Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #35: The Grand Finale Minus The Grand Part

Clash of the Champions 35
Date: August 21, 1997
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes

Clash of the Champions more or less was WCW’s Saturday Night’s Main Event. They started it up to go head to head with Wrestlemania 4 and actually put a solid dent in it. The show went on for 9 years but by the end no one cared at all. The show was just worthless as there was already two hours of television a week so in essence we were just getting an extra Nitro two weeks a year, which is why this is the final one.

As for current storylines, this is at the height of the NWO’s power but Sting is looming. I think you know the story there. The main event is Luger and DDP vs. Savage and Hall. See what I mean about how this just isn’t that interesting of a show? Let’s get to it.

The opening video just runs down the card. Other than the stupid tag team main event this sounds pretty decent.

We get a clip of Dillon saying that Sting has until Thursday to make his demands as Sting had ripped up two contracts with match offers in them. Sting came through the crowd and got in the ring and the fans chanted Hogan. Sting pointed to the fans who were chanting it. This angle was freaking sweet. And then Hogan and his ego just had to kill it dead.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael

Jarrett used to be a Horsemen and stole McMichael’s wife Debra so Mongo wants to get the title to get some revenge or something. This was the epitome of a feud that no one wanted to see but would never die. Mongo is a Horsemen here meaning we get to hear the sweetest theme music of all time. Jarrett was neither interesting nor good at this time whereas Mongo never was either of those things so we’ll give it to…dang who do we give this one to?

Actually let’s just hope this ends fast. We take a break and come back with Jarrett throwing Mongo into the steps (His name was Steve Mongo McMichael in case you were wondering). Debra chokes him and I still couldn’t care less. The WCW midcard just completely sucked and while we were having Owen vs. Austin followed by Rock vs. Austin in WWF at this point for the IC belt, this just doesn’t hold up. Jarrett puts on a sleeper as a great visual representation for this match.

Mongo gets his own and Debra gets up on the apron. For no apparent reason Eddie Guerrero runs out with a belt and goes up top but hits Jarrett by mistake. Mongo covers for the title with ease. Debra tries to get him back and fails at it.

Rating: D+. At least it was short. These two feuded forever and no one cared ever. It just wasn’t interesting at all but they thought they could just slap the Horsemen name on it and get a good reaction from it through the south. There wasn’t much here though so the time was good if nothing else. Mongo held it for less than a month before Hennig turned heel and took it.

Alex Wright comes out and speaks in English and Gene warns him to speak in English which was stupid. It’s as simple of a promo as you could ask for. He has Ultimo Dragon tonight.

Gene is with the guys from a show called Dinner and a Movie. In essence they showed a movie and made food with a play on words of the movie title. It was an ok idea but why are these guys on a wrestling show? There’s your problem with WCW right there: too much corporate interference.

Stevie Richards vs. Raven

Raven “didn’t have a contract” at this point and insisted on wrestling only in No DQ matches. This is a grudge match or something as Richards was tired of Raven pushing him around. Richards had allegedly had a career ending neck injury but miraculously healed and showed up in WCW a few weeks later. They point out Raven’s ankle issue as he has a thing on his shoe to balance out the fact that his right leg is shorter than his left.

The Raven drop toehold hits to the chair as this is just a squash match so far. He throws in a bulldog onto the chair for good measure. Richards comes back with some decent stuff but at the end of the day he remembers he’s Steven Richards and the other guy is Raven and the best DDT other than Jake Roberts (who trained Raven) ends it.

Rating: C+. It was a squash and a quick one at that so we’ll just call it a bit above average for the DDT, which is the coolest move in history. Richards would be gone in like two weeks or so.

We get a cool video about Ultimo Dragon, explaining a bit of his history and his name. WCW hit the ball so far out of the park with this division that it’s insane. The name was called Ultimate Dragon but that was incorrect, as it was supposed to be Ultimo Dragon: Final Dragon, as in the final student of Bruce Lee, who he emulated in the ring. That’s the kind of thing that you just never get in WWE and it’s why the cruiserweights worked so well.

That and they never took them seriously. The shot of the J-Crown (8 titles from around the world which were defended on WCW television and included a WWF light heavyweight title that was active for 20 years but only in Japan, meaning that a WWF Title was defended on WCW television multiple times in 1996 and 1997) titles being piled up is just awesome.

TV Title: Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright

When Dragon won the title a few weeks prior, it was the match where no one talked about the match whatsoever other than the final three count as the whole match was nothing but talking about the NWO. At the end they more or less said hey we have a new champion! Now back to what we were talking about. It was just ridiculous how that was all they talked about.

Wright was a guy that they tried so hard to push but it just never played out like they wanted it to. He was this young hotshot that was somewhat over as a face so of course they turned him heel and no one cared after that. Dragon really was underrated in the ring. In WWE they just threw him into the cruiserweight division and let him die off because that division sucked so hard it was pathetic. These two feuded for the better part of a year and I don’t think anyone ever cared.

There was no focus at all on the title or anything as it was always about the NWO. Dragon gets the Asai moonsault that he invented and does better than anyone else. The commentary is all about them as well which is NICE. We hit a very nice ending sequence as they fight over pins but Wright hits a SWEET German suplex for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match but just boring. The problem was that while these two had good matches, it’s Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright. There’s just no heat at all and it’s not a great matchup while being a good match if that makes sense.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Jericho

Eddie is challenging here and is freshly full heel. Eddie’s cowardly heel stuff of running on his knees always made me chuckle. How much commentary do you really need on a Guerrero vs. Jericho cruiserweight match? The Canadian goes for that running springboard dropkick to the guy on the apron that he uses a lot but slips and botches it badly.

I guess once a year is understandable. In a quick ending, they hit another fast series of pinfalls but Jericho actually keeps Eddie down and gets the pin. Eddie jumps him after the match.

Rating: C-. WAY too short here but we just had to have Mongo and Jarrett earlier instead of on Nitro right? The ending sequence was fun as always and these two just flowed together pretty well. They needed more time though and that’s why the grade is low.

Silver King/Villano 4/Villano 5/Psicosis vs. Super Calo/Juventud Guerrera/Hector Garza/Lismark Jr.

More or less the idea here is go out there and do a bunch of flips like you do every night without ever getting pushed more than a tiny bit against each other. This is Lucha rules, meaning if someone goes to the floor then they don’t have to make a tag for someone else to come in. I used to hate Mike Tenay but he’s worth his weight in gold here.

There’s no real point to saying who is in as they move in and out so fast that it’s hard to keep up with them. We hit the big pile on with everyone hitting their big over the top rope until Psicosis hits the guillotine legdrop off the top onto Super Calo for the pin.

Rating: B-. It was just over the top and ridiculous which is what these guys did best. This was very fun and it worked well as it always did. These guys were well paid to go out there and just get the crowd going and that’s what they always did.

The cooking guys join the NWO. Tonight is their one year anniversary but Hogan isn’t here tonight because he’s in Canada doing a Hollywood movie. That’s WCW for you. We go to a commercial and come back to DDP Diamond Cutting one of the movie guys.

Konnan/Syxx vs. Ric Flair/Curt Hennig

Hennig was kind of an associate Horseman at the time but soon he would join the NWO and injure Flair. If there was ever a guy tailor made to be in the Horsemen, it’s Hennig. Syxx (X-Pac) more or less beats up Flair but we’ll ignore the pop he’s getting for doing it. That doesn’t exist. Flair gets his knee knocked out as Hennig hits the Fisherman’s Suplex on Konnan to get the win. This was a five minute train wreck.

Rating: C-. This was just insane and it felt like it was about two minutes long instead of the five that it actually was. Hennig denies being a Horsemen but also denies not being a Horsemen while only saying one thing. He actually does this which is impressive.

He would go heel soon enough in another dumb move because he was perfect for the Horsemen. He had the look, he could talk, he was over, he had the attitude and he was great in the ring. Naturally he was thrown into the NWO and forgotten about.

WCW Tag Titles: Lex Luger/DDP vs. Randy Savage/Scott Hall

About ten guys come out for the NWO and they have their party for it being their birthday. Apparently Nash is letting Savage defend his half of the tag titles for no apparent reason. Yeah of course we just throw two guys together that have never teamed together before (according to the ring announcer) and give them a tag title shot.

In WWF they would have won the titles. People keep popping the balloons that the NWO dropped so it sounds like people keep shooting guns or something and it’s really annoying. And for no apparent reason everyone other than Nash leaves. It’s exactly what you would expect from a match where the titles simply weren’t going to change hands.

The faces dominate early on but then the heels take over to set up the hot tag. Luger gets Hall in the rack but takes an accidental Diamond Cutter and gets pinned. What else is there to say here?

Rating: C+. It’s ok and that’s about it. What more do you want here? They had an ok match that no one cared about on a show that not a lot of people actually watched. Are you looking for something huge here?

We come back and Bischoff talks forever and then the lights begin to flicker. They go off and we see Sting in the rafters with a vulture. The famous speech in a child’s voice follows and the lights go out again and the bird is on the top rope. The NWO is terrified and Nash pulls the belt back to swing it at him as we go off the air. Think about how stupid this was for the live audience for a minute.

Overall Rating: C-. You could see that this was about the name of the show and nothing more. Yeah there were four title matches but that happened at almost every Nitro. Yes two titles changed hands but who cares? It’s just not an interesting show as Nitro was lighting the world on fire on Mondays on a weekly basis. Ten years earlier this was an awesome idea but here it just didn’t hold up at all. Not bad, but only watch if you like this time in WCW. Otherwise it’s nothing of note at all.

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #34: On To The Year Of Sting

Clash of the Champions #34
Date: January 21, 1997
Location: Wisconsin Center Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 6,800
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Dusty Rhodes, Bobby Heenan

This is another of the prime time specials from WCW and one of the last ones. The NWO is in full control here and this show means nothing for the most part as everything was about Nitro. Also we were more or less in a deep freeze because everything was building to Sting vs. Hogan which was in about 11 months. This is also the go home show for Souled Out. Let’s get to it.

After some yapping we’re ready to start.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Ultimo Dragon

Dragon is champion coming in here and Tenay is here for the sake of knowledge. Malenko has lost two in a row coming into this including one the previous night and the opener at Starrcade. The idiot that is known as Tony Schiavone keeps calling him Ultimate Dragon. They hit the mat and Dragon uses a bunch of spin moves to get out. They stay on the mat and we take a break.

The NWO now has its own hotline.

Back with them slugging it out. Dragon apparently lost the J-Crown at the January 4th show at the Tokyo Dome to Jushin Thunder Liger. This is a more hard hitting match than you’re used to with these two. Long vertical suplex gets two and it’s off to a head scissors on the mat. Dragon hammers away with kicks and Dean heads to the floor for a breather.

Half crab by Malenko and here comes Dean. Off to another leg lock and out to the floor. All Malenko here as he hooks on the figure four. Actually he doesn’t as Dragon blocks it for a bit. They speed things up a bit and it’s a spin wheel kick from Dragon to take Dean down. Dean grabs a superplex to take Dragon down and we speed it up even more. Powerbomb by Dean is reversed into a rana but we counter stuff even more.

Out to the floor and Dean is whipped into the railing. Asai Moonsault takes Dean down and the fans are into this to say the least. Back in and a top rope moonsault gets two for Dragon. Now all the fans turn and look at something else as Dragon gets a twisting rana off the top. Tiger suplex is reversed into a Cloverleaf attempt but that gets reversed. Another powerbomb is reversed into a butterfly powerbomb and a third Cloverleaf attempt. Down goes Onoo and the Cloverleaf ends this.

Rating: B+. Great stuff here as they were incredibly crisp with both guys working incredibly hard. The cruiserweight division was absolutely incredible at this point and Dean was at his absolute peak in 1997. Excellent match here with very little missing from it at all and an incredible opener. Bets on anything being good compared to this?

Mike Enos vs. Scotty Riggs

Neither gets an intro so what do you expect here? This is a very basic power vs. speed match and Riggs is here to look good before his match with Bagwell at the PPV. Both guys are incredibly generic and I see absolutely no reason for this to be here. A running forearm ends this for Riggs in about two minutes. Totally pointless match that gets no rating. Riggs says he’s the heart and soul of WCW. I can’t make this stuff up.

Here are the Horsemen, in this case Benoit and Anderson with some women. Oh and Mongo is there too. The fans of course want Flair. Benoit talks about how awesome he is and there’s a HUGE Benoit chant. Anderson says finish Sullivan tonight. Mongo (huge booing for the Bear here in Packer town). Debra says nothing of note at all.

Chavo Guerrero Jr/Chris Jericho/Super Calo vs. Konnan/La Parka/Mr. JL

Tenay and the other commentators say the Horsemen are having issues because Flair isn’t here. La Parka is replacing Psicosis who is injured and Jericho is replacing Juventud Guerrera who just no showed. This is under lucha rules, meaning if you hit the floor another member of your team can come in just like a tag. Chavo vs. JL to start with Jerry Lynn (what the JL stands for) destroying him.

Off to Konnan and Calo with Konnan continuing his team’s dominance. Calo was a guy I never liked or got the appeal of for the most part. We get some nice speed moves from those two with Calo looking kind of awesome actually. Off to Jericho and La Parka for awhile now and Parka is a bit nuts. Parka does a Spinarooni of all things but can’t keep Jericho down. Konnan comes in and it’s a Doomsday Device with La Parka throwing out a Whisper in the Wind instead of a clothesline. That was kind of awesome.

Konnan takes Jericho down and it’s off to Chavo. They are MOVING out there. Jericho vs. JL at the moment with Jericho taking over. Konnan comes in as does Chavo so there are four in the ring at once. Out to the floor and JL dives on Jericho. Chavo dives on JL and La Parka dives in general. Calo with a slingshot hilo to La Parka and in the ring JL gets a rana on Jericho for two. Jericho wants a superplex but settles for a super rana for the pin. Jericho looked like a star here.

Rating: B. Fun match here that was nothing but dives and speed. This is something you got in WCW that was great: they mixed up the styles every match almost. We’ve had a technical match, power vs. speed and now lucha libre. Not bad for 40 minutes. Jericho looked awesome here and of course would go on to mediocrity in WCW before becoming a legend in WWE.

Renegade/Joe Gomez vs. Harlem Heat

Guess what we’ve got here. Gomez is a guy that Is just kind of around while Renegade is the WCW version of Ultimate Warrior who hasn’t meant anything in about 18 months. Booker beats on Gomez for a bit and then Stevie and Sherri get to do the same. Axe kick to Gomez but Renegade comes in to get what passes for a hot tag. Harlem Heat destroys him and the Heat Seeker (Doomsday Device with a missile dropkick) ends him quickly. Just a squash.

Masahiro Chono vs. Alex Wright

Chono is NWO. He jumps Wright immediately but Wright charges back at him. Wright backflips off the top and gets an enziguri. Not in the same move mind you. He’s a dancer, not Spider-Morrison. The fans don’t really like either guy here. Wright can move and gets a leg lariat for about 9 but Nick Patrick won’t count with any speed at all.

Chono takes over again and throws Wright over the top which should be a DQ but isn’t here because Patrick doesn’t want to count. Sunset flip by Wright but the shoulder of Patrick hurts. Belly to back gets no cover and then Wright misses a cross body. Mafia Kick ends Wright pretty easily and the shoulder is fine of course.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here with the idea being that it was a preview of what the PPV is going to be like. The match itself means nothing of course but it wasn’t really supposed to. Wright again continues to mean nothing at all but being a midcard jobber to the stars. Weak match but it got the point across.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Scott Norton

Patrick is the referee again. Eddie is US Champion here but doesn’t have the physical belt as Syxx stole it. Norton chops away and uses basic power to take over. Eddie goes after the knee and gets Norton off his feet like a smart man. He chops away which just makes Norton mad. Norton is NWO if that clears anything up. Here comes the power game again as I can remember the majority of this show from watching it when it aired.

Norton does something I haven’t seen before as he sets him for a suplex and just drops him without moving at all. No cover though as Norton is wanting to show off here. Big powerbomb puts Guerrero down again but a clothesline misses Guerrero and down goes Patrick. DDP, currently the fastest rising star in forever comes through the crowd and drops Norton with the Diamond Cutter and gets a huge pop. Frog Splash makes Patrick count the three with a hilarious look on his face.

Rating: D+. Well they did a great job here of making it seem possible that WCW had a chance on Satruday at the PPV. Not much of a match but it wasn’t supposed to be. Eddie, like Jericho, looked great here but that wouldn’t matter as we needed guys like Buff Bagwell to get pushes and the TV time.

Giant talks about Hogan. He’s in the dark here almost and talks about how Hogan paid Giant to be on the sidelines and keep him from taking out Hogan because no one can stop the Giant. He strikes a match and says that Hogan is like this match. It gave light, it gave some warmth, but eventually it gets blown out. At Souled Out, Hogan is blown out. I’ve always liked this promo and it’s still pretty awesome today.

Chris Benoit vs. Kevin Sullivan

Woman is here with Chris and looks pretty good here. This is falls count anywhere again. Kevin wants to start it on the floor and Benoit says let’s do it. They had another of these at the Great American Bash the previous year and it was totally awesome. They’re in the crowd almost immediately and are in the back quickly.

The first room is the men’s room and Benoit knocks a towel dispenser off the way with his head. Benoit throws a trashcan that hits Hart and the referee. This is almost move for move the same match as their Great American Bash match. Sullivan gets a clothesline for two as we’re still in the men’s room. Now we’re talking about an Andy Griffith movie.

Back into the arena and Benoit is kicked down the steps. Seriously, this is the SAME MATCH. Back in the ring and Benoit is in the Tree of Woe for the running knee. Double stomp to Benoit gets two. Woman comes in and cracks Sullivan with a wooden chair to end Sullivan and give Benoit the win. Well at least the ending was different I suppose. Also they didn’t swerve us.

Rating: B-. Well yes it’s a good match but legitimately over half of the spots are identical to the one at the Bash. Also the Bash’s ending was better and it went on longer. It also helps that we got to see it for the first time back then. Sometimes you need to see a semi-shoot like this though as it makes things more interesting, as it did here.

Benoit hits him with a chair again post match.

Amazing French Canadians vs. Steiner Brothers

The French Canadians are the Quebecers. Colonel Parker is with them in a French Canadian soldier outfit I guess. They try the Canadian national anthem but get cut off by Steinerized. The Outsiders injured Scott in a form of attempted vehicular manslaughter and this is his return. The Outsiders pop up on the screen to laugh at them with Nash implying he’ll come out here.

Scott has a new look here which would eventually be what he wore as a heel. The Steiners clean house to start and hit top rope clotheslines almost at the same time. We take a break and come back with Rick in some trouble. The Canadians beat him down and try their Cannonball move but Rick gets out of the way just in time. The Canadians seem to not tag at all. Here’s Scotty who destroys them both on his own. A French flag shot fails and the elevated DDT ends Oulette with ease.

Rating: C-. Without the commercial we saw about 3 minutes here so why not rate it. Nothing worth note at all as it was again really just a squash to set up the Steiners against the Outsiders at the PPV. Scott would be about to get pushed to the moon as a solo guy and get a major push. Anyway, this was domination.

Scott Hall vs. Lex Luger

Main event time here and Hall has a small army with him. Luger has the kind of rare black boots on. Luger does the pec dance and gets a toothpick in his face for his troubles. All power by Luger to start and he no sells the fallaway slam. A middle rope bulldog puts Luger down for two though and Scott works on the arm. Chokeslam puts Luger down but he’s up quickly.

Some fan shouts about oozing machismo which makes me smile a bit. He hits the floor and the numbers (I only see the number Syxx but whatever) catch up with him so that Hall can take over. Syxx interferes again with Nash distracting the referee. The clothesline from Syxx gets two. Now the fallaway slam works a bit better, getting two this time.

Off to the abdominal stretch as Luger is in trouble. Luger gets out of it after about a minute but misses an elbow and here comes Hall again. Luger comes back again and hits a slingshot dropkick of all things and lets loose his rather limited offense. Atomic drops and punches and clotheslines OH MY! No sign for the Rack yet but there’s one after a powerslam. Nash breaks it up but Luger fights both of them off. Where is WCW? Is there a good Old Maid game going on in the back? Syxx finally gets a shot in and it’s a DQ.

Rating: C. Just a main event match here with an unsurprising finish. At least they gave them some time here and we got a decent match out of it. Luger probably should have gone over but I guess they wanted the Outsiders looking as strong as possible going into the PPV. Not bad, but just kind of there for a TV main event.

The Steiners come out for the save from the beatdown.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show here from a weaker period for WCW. There was some good stuff here but the bad is hard to overlook. The opener is great of course but there wasn’t much really good after that. The good outweighs the bad though and they build up Souled Out pretty well so I can live with this. Not bad but nothing great either.

 

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #17: This Is A Free Show. Remember That.

Clash of the Champions 17
Date: November 19, 1991
Location: Savannah Civic Center, Savannah, Georgia
Attendance: 6,922
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

This is a show that I remember watching on a tape quite a few times. This is a stacked card with five title matches and the reveal of the major storyline at the time. There had been a lot of massive gift boxes being delivered to Sting and tonight we got to find out who had delivered guys like Cactus Jack and Abdullah the Butcher to try to hurt Sting and take him out. This is a nostalgia show for me but it still looks good. Let’s get to it.
We list off the title matches and everything looks good, but Rick Steiner is getting a world title shot vs. Luger. Well you can’t win everything I guess.

Tony and Jim run down the high points which is nothing of note. Missy and Eric, with THICK hair, talk about Missy’s interview with the newest rookie in the company: Marcus Alexander Bagwell.

Thomas Rich vs. Big Josh

TON of notes here. For one thing this is a lumberjack match. For those of you that aren’t old school enough or can’t get the name change, that would be Tommy Rich, as in the former NWA World Champion. Big Josh is the guy famous in WCW for dancing with bear cubs. In WWF he’s most famous for being the original Doink the Clown. Rich is in a group called the York Foundation led by Alexandra York, more famously known as Terri Runnels.

Ok now for the match even though I’m spent from all those notes. They used to be friends (a long time ago for you Veronica Mars fans. For those of you that don’t get that, go watch it as it’s a very underrated show) and then Rich turned heel so it’s a revenge match. Josh is this wilderness dude that wears jean shorts and a flannel shirt to the ring. The lumberjacks are a bunch of midcarders that mean nothing of note.

The Freebirds, I guess faces at this point, throw Rich back in. Richard Morton and Terrance Taylor, members of the Foundation, beat Josh up on the floor as you would expect them to. The match itself is nothing for the most part as it’s just filler for the lumberjack stuff. Taylor accidentally hooks Rich’s leg and Josh hits his seated senton to end it.

Rating: D. This was nothing at all. It filled in 8 minutes and wasn’t interesting in the slightest. Other than Sting this is one of the worst times for WCW other than its end as Flair was gone so no one bought Luger as champion. This was a good example of it: a guy that dances with bear cubs fighting a bunch of Wall Street guys that were barely able to beat jobbers. See why this was a bad time for the company? Boring match.

Firebreaker Chip vs. Bobby Eaton

Chip was part of a team with Todd Champion who were called the Patriots. Eaton was about to become a member of the Dangerous Alliance. Chip was this young guy that never really did much but I think they won the US Tag Titles at one point. The crowd is about as alive as Christian’s chances of main eventing Wrestlemania next year (get over it fanboys. It’s never happening).

Eaton was one of the best workers of the 80s and was still great at this point. It’s a shame this isn’t a tag match where he’s one of the best ever. This is just pure filler and Eaton hits a suplex and a bridge to get the pin. Yeah whatever.

Rating: D-. This was like the first match but just without an angle going with it. The crowd was dead and there was nothing of note here. There was nothing of note here but the wrestling was decent. This was just a match. That’s a good way to put it: this was just a match between two decent guy. Other than that there’s absolutely nothing here. It’s not horrific or anything but it’s just there.

Ad for Starrcade, which was the first Battlebowl and my first WCW show. I can’t wait for that show, even though it’s pretty terrible.

It’s time for the box thing and Sting’s entrance is something else. He’s just the US Champion here but he’s by far and away the most popular guy in the company and possibly the top star in the world at this point. A bunch of muscle guys bring this carriage without wheels thing out. There’s a name for it but I can’t think of it and it doesn’t really matter.

A woman (Madusa) pops out and tries to seduce Sting. This of course doesn’t work as Sting is a HERO. With his back turned though (Sting never was the smartest guy in the world) Lex Luger pops out of the carriage and hits Sting in his knee that was destroyed about a year and a half or so ago. In a funny bit Luger hits the left knee and the with Sting does goes after the right knee. Sting shakes his head and shouts NO and then Luger grabs the left one which is the bad one. An army of faces run him off after not a lot of knee damage. This comes into play later on.

Diamond Studd vs. Tom Zenk

The Diamond guy would go to WWF soon and imitate Al Pacino with a name of Razor Ramon. This match started in the break for some reason. Sting is being attended to in the back so we cut this down to a quarter of the screen. Sting is put in an ambulance and taken to a hospital. Back to the match and Zenk kicks Diamond Dude in the head and hits a crucifix to end it. He takes a Diamond Death Drop (Razor’s Edge) afterwards.

Rating: N/A. This was just a backdrop so that Sting could leave.

TV Title: P.N. News vs. Steve Austin

These two feuded forever and it never went much of anywhere. News is a very fat rapper and very white on top of that. You might have heard of the other guy. This is still the old NWA TV Title which is far better looking than the more famous WCW one. News would dominate Austin for the most part and then Austin would either get out on a time limit draw or a DQ or a count out or something like that.

News completely dominates for the most part here while wearing bright orange with the words Yo Baby Yo Baby Yo all over his tights. Basically Austin can’t do anything here and knows it so he just tries to get in a shot where he can. He also has shoulder length blonde hair if you can imagine that. AUSTIN GOES LUCHA as he dives over the top with a flying forearm to save his lady friend.

For no apparent reason Austin goes for the stomach and of course that doesn’t work. They’re badly calling spots here as it amazes me that you could have a guy as talented as Austin stuck with a guy like News. Austin avoids an avalanche and uses his feet on the ropes to get the heel pin.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and Austin is always fun to watch. News wasn’t as bad as his gimmick makes him sound but since this is WCW we can let that slide I think. This was short enough to not be that bad as Austin cheats to win again, which is the whole point to this feud. Short and not that awful. Austin would become part of the Dangerous Alliance soon and be repackaged as a killer which were the seeds of his legendary character.

Missy talks to Bagwell and we actually see videos of him training. He’s 21 here and would be around for nearly 10 years which has to be one of the longest tenured guys in WCW history without leaving for anything other than injury.

It’s time for the Top Ten, which was updated weekly and rarely made anything resembling sense.

10. Vader
9. Bobby Eaton
8. Bill Kazmaier
7. Cactus Jack
6. Barry Windham
5. Dustin Rhodes
4. Ron Simmons
3. Steve Austin
2. Rick Steiner
1. Sting

Yeah….just a few odd ones in there.

Cactus Jack vs. Van Hammer

Van Hammer is one of the weirdest cases in wrestling history. He was completely devoid of talent, his gimmick was that of a heavy metal guitarist and he couldn’t really talk. That being said, he was the second most popular guy in the company after Sting. I LOVED this guy and for the life of me I don’t know why. This was by far his biggest feud as he never did anything of note after this but whatever.

Jack jumps Hammer as a fairly attractive woman looks like she’s in ecstasy over him. Jack jumps him (Tony called it) and it’s on. This wasn’t a feud yet but it would become one. Hammer gets a dropkick to the stomach and we head to the floor. Hammer realizes he’s fighting Cactus Jack on the floor and goes back to the ring immediately.

Cactus Clothesline and we’re on the floor. It’s all Foley here until Van Hammer hits a clothesline to the back of the head which I think was one of his finishers. Jack gets Hammer’s guitar and hits him in the throat with it for the pin, which was Hammer’s first loss. They brawl to the back.

Rating: D+. This was pretty weak as Jack just beat him up for the most part and then cheated to win. This is probably too high though due to bias but that’s the fun part of nostalgic shows. Hammer would never really improve but obviously Jack would.

We get ahold of Eric on the phone at a hospital where Sting is. Way before he starts talking though we hear Eric tell Tony to move his head in a funny moment.

At Halloween Havoc The Enforcers (Zbyszko and Anderson) broke Barry Windham’s arm by slamming it in a car door, putting him out. Windham tried to keep wrestling but couldn’t, so Dustin Rhodes, his partner, has a mystery partner for the tag title match tonight. This is going to be awesome.

Tag Titles: Enforcers vs. Dustin Rhodes/???

The champions don’t know who they’re fighting yet. Rhodes comes out with Windham who is in street clothes. We bring out Dustin’s partner but he’s in a black robe with a big dragon mask on. Oh you know where this is going. Dustin takes the dragon mask off and there’s a hood over his head.

If you didn’t get it, it’s RICKY FREAKING STEAMBOAT. Anderson loses his mind over this, clearly shouting NOT RICKY STEAMBOAT!!! The fans freaking erupt as Steamboat had been doing WWF house shows as recently as three weeks or so before this. HUGE shock and to say this is going to be a classic is an understatement.

Steamboat and Anderson start us off as the champions are trying to adjust on the fly. It’s a big brawl immediately on the floor for a bit. It’s ALL Rhodes and Steamboat here as they clean house. Larry’s arm gets worked over to start and it’s been one sided so far. Tony makes the stupid statement of you have to be a good singles wrestler to be a good tag wrestler. I’m not sure on that one. Now that I’m back from making a thread on it, let’s continue.

Anderson breaks tradition and comes off the top with a double axe that actually connects! That’s the extent of Anderson’s offense though as this continues to be one sided. Larry comes in and slows things down (shocking isn’t it?). Ricky uses martial arts and that’s using one of Larry’s moves some how. Well to an extent that’s true but it’s worded oddly.

The heels take over with good old fashioned double teaming. Can anyone sell a sunset flip like Arn Anderson? If they have I’d certainly like to see it. Why do wrestling companies always insist on showing us shots of the crowd in the middle of the match? We know they’re there and we can tell if they’re enjoying it or not. We don’t have to see them to prove it.

Arn and Larry use some great double team stuff and Arn busts out a bearhug. They work on Ricky’s back as this has been a very fun match. They switch out when the referee is busy and swear they tagged. Moments later Dustin and Ricky make a tag but the referee didn’t see it. The referee is of course Nick Patrick so did you expect anything less than nefarious means?

Dustin gets the hot tag and comes in to clean house, beating the heck out of both guys. He hits the bulldog on Arn and makes a blind tag. Arn doesn’t know it and walks into the cross body off the top and there’s no way you’re getting up from that. The roof is blown off again as the new champions celebrate.

Rating: A-. This was a great match including a great surprise for the partner. This was a televised title change which is something you never saw back in the day. They went old school here with the heels cheating and the faces working hard and everything worked. It’s a great match and considering this was on free TV, you can’t go wrong at all.

The Enforcers are mad about losing apparently because they didn’t sign to fight Steamboat. Arn and Eaton would team up to get the tag titles in a few months which became part of WrestleWar 92 which had probably the best gimmick match in WCW history. I’m looking forward to that one.

We get a music video about Jushin Liger, complete with clips of him beating up someone named Pegasus Kid. I’m sure he would never go anywhere.

Dangerously (Heyman) has the contract for the US Title match later tonight. There’s a clause in it that says if Sting can’t be there by the time the bell rings, Rude gets the title by forfeit. In a funny line Heyman says “I’m not lying this time.” Always a good sign that he has to point that out.

Jim is on the phone with Eric again who is with Sting. Ok never mind he’s not with Sting. Sting is apparently leaving and Eric tells him about the loophole where he’s going to have to forfeit and apparently steals an ambulance.

Light Heavyweight Title: Johnny B. Badd vs. Brian Pillman

These two would put on a classic at Fall Brawl 95. Unfortunately that was when Badd had stopped having an overly flamboyant character and was getting ridiculously good ridiculously fast. On the way to the ring Badd has women putting money in his garter belt. What does that tell you? This title would evolve into the Cruiserweight Title in a few years and actually mean something.

Pillman and Liger had one of the best openers ever in a few months at Superbrawl but something tells me this isn’t going to be anything like that. The weight limit here is 236lbs for no adequately explained reason. Badd’s manager is Teddy “Peanut” Long. Has this guy EVER not been working? We hear again that Badd was a boxer which I think was at least partially true.

Pillman was completely awesome at this point while Badd was the opposite, which makes for an interesting dynamic here. They brawl to the floor and I’m trying to figure out if Badd is a heel or a face. Well the people are booing him but I’m not sure what that really proves in this case. Badd takes over for a bit but Pillman hits a nice spinwheel kick.

Badd totally botches the top rope sunset flip but Teddy has the referee for no apparent reason. We do the ram the wrestler into the guy on the apron for the rollup to end it. They managed to mess up the cradle too. Badd knocks out Long afterwards.

Rating: D+. Badd just isn’t that good. There’s no other way to put it: he’s just not that good. Pillman was more or less carrying this and while it’s not bad, it’s certainly not that good. Like I said though, Badd would improve a lot and in 95, these guys would have some wars.

United States Title: Rick Rude vs. Sting

Rude had debuted like a month earlier and had guaranteed that he would win the US Title from Sting. Paul cuts a promo talking about how Sting isn’t here but of course as he does the ambulance pulls up and Sting goes in the wrong door. His buddies help him out and the first is on the ramp. Sting is limping horribly and he manages to press slam Rude on the ramp which is impressive even if he’s healthy.

Crowd is electric here. This is ALL Sting as he realizes if he stops moving at all then Rude can get to his knee. Rude gets to it anyway and wraps the knee around the post. I remember FREAKING when this was on. Rude Awakening is blocked which I think had only been done in WWF by Warrior and Hogan at this point. Rude gets knocked down but rams into the knee on the way down.

Heyman gets a phone shot to the back of the head for a false finish. Ross is losing his mind of course and Dangerously is going nuts. DDT puts Rude down but a chop block and tights get Rude the title. This was like four minutes long but it never once slowed down at all. Rude would hold the belt for over a year and had to forfeit due to injury.

Rating: B+. This is WAY high, but the atmosphere here and the energy is completely insane. For less than five minutes long to get that kind of a reaction and do a TON of other stuff in the process, this means a ton. Let’s see what this accomplished.

1. It gets Rude over. Sting was the MAN in WCW and Rude just beat him for his title in his second match with the company. Rude had been a glorified midcarder until his last maybe five months in WWF and now he’s a total tough guy that beat Sting and is the US Champion.

2. It frees up Sting to fight Luger for the world title. Sting was clearly destined to win the world title but he had to get rid of the US belt first. This was like Cena losing the US Title to Orlando Jordan (yes young fans, that happened) before he could beat JBL for the world title.

3. It keeps Sting strong. It in essence took Madusa, Luger, Dangerously and Rude plus a cell phone and a bad knee to beat Sting. To manage to keep him strong and make Rude looks strong at the same time is a great thing. Sting keeps his credibility and Rude gets the rub.

4. It gives Sting a feud to come back to once he wins the world title. And dang was that feud awesome.

Not bad for four minutes and 50 seconds, counting the thirty seconds it took to get to the ring for the champion.

We go to Dangerously, Rude and Madusa who say it was all a setup and Luger was in on it too. He says WCW answers to him and forms the Dangerous Alliance who would eventually get Zbyszko, Anderson, Eaton and Austin to join Rude. Dangerously had been fired from being a commentator so he formed this team to get back at WCW. He would do the same thing with a guy named Brock after he was fired by Vince after the Invasion. Arn Anderson later said that this was one of the best groups of talent he had ever seen, and only WCW could manage to screw it up. That’s just funny.

Ron Simmons says he’ll be back from his wrist injury soon enough. Him winning the world title was mind blowing to say the least.

We recap Rick Steiner pinning Luger in a tag match and beating up Race.

WCW World Title: Rick Steiner vs. Lex Luger

This was supposed to be Simmons but the aforementioned wrist injury kept that from happening. Scott was also hurt if you were wondering why the more talented one isn’t in there instead. Steiner takes it to the mat and Luger is just beaten there. We hear about Scott having a one night manager’s license or something. This is where WCW got stupid at times: instead of having a license or something, he can’t just be there for his brother’s biggest match ever? WWF did it too and it was stupid then as well so shut up about my WWF bias. Yes I like WWF more and I’m going to cut them more slack. I like them more and have since I can remember. So to the people that keep complaining about it, let it go.

Steiner dominates early as you would expect. Steiner keeps dominating but Race yells at him and that somehow gives Luger the advantage. Did he scare a guy named the Dog Faced Gremlin into losing his advantage? Luger throws in a low blow and takes over. Luger pounds on him but Steiner just kind of shakes it off and makes his comeback. The top rope bulldog gets two as Luger puts his foot on the rope. Mr. Hughes, the bodyguard, and Scott Steiner come in and do nothing of importance. It lets Luger get a belt shot to Steiner to end it though.

Rating: D. The lack of drama hurts it as this was just literally thrown on at the end. It’s not horrible but seriously, RICK STEINER? No one else was available? This was just a weird match and while it’s watchable, it’s certainly not very good. It came and went though so there’s always that.

Tony and Jim talk about the hotline where they’ll have the decision on whether the tag title switch stands. LANCE RUSSELL and Gordon Solie are doing the talking. Any old school fan just came to that.

Overall Rating
: A-. This was a free show. I actually forgot about that a few times during the tape. To say the card is stacked and a lot happens here is an understatement. They fit 9 matches, five of which were title matches with two changes, into a two hour card. How’s THAT for efficiency? There’s also a major stable being formed and a classic tag match. Couple this in with the fact that this was thrown on TV for free and that the WWF PPV of the month was the abysmal Survivor Series and this is as one sided as it can get.




Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #16: WCW In 1991 Is Very Bad

Clash of the Champions 16: Fall Brawl 91
Date: September 5, 1991
Location: Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center, Augusta, Georgia
Attendance: 2,800
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

It’s late 91 in WCW so I’d bet on some focus on Sting and Luger. The main focus here seems to be on the Light Heavyweight Title Tournament which is a title that wound up going nowhere. Other than that there’s a tag team tournament final which means nothing for the most part. WCW in 91 was pretty weak to say the least but we have to get through this so let’s get to it.

Bischoff, Hyatt and Dangerously are going to be doing the interviews tonight apparently.

Battle Royal

Z-Man, Bobby Eaton, Ranger Ross (he still had a job at this point?), Tommy Rich, Young Pistol Tracy (Smothers), Oz (Nash), PN News (big fat white rapper), Sgt. Buddy Lee Parker, Steve Austin (with a freaking ponytail), Dustin Rhodes, Terrance Taylor (sucks), Big Josh, Barry Windham, One Man Gang, El Gigante (legit 7’7)

Standard battle royal to start with people just beating on each other with no particular rhyme or reason. Gigante picks Taylor up and has his over the ropes but gently sits him down instead. The guy never was that smart. Then he puts Parker on the top rope and pulls him back in too. Dude, READ THE RULES!!! No one out yet I don’t think. Eaton and Austin finally to the apron but that gets them nowhere.

Big Josh tries to skin the cat and pulls out Ross and Taylor but goes out himself also, bringing us down to 12. Rich is out as is Parker. Z-Man is out as everyone left beats on Oz and Gang. Nine left at this point. Austin puts Tracy out. Gang LAUNCHES Eaton out as we’re down to seven. Make it six as News is out. Austin and Windham go out together so we’re down to Gang, Gigante, Rhodes and Oz.

The heels hammer down the good guys as I distinctly remember watching this show at some point in my life. It’s so weird to see Gigante towering over Nash. Rhodes goes out due to double teaming but the heels turn around and a double clothesline gives the giant the win. This was called the Georgia Brawl apparently. Ok then.

Rating: D. This was pretty awful for the most part. It’s really just a battle royal which isn’t all that interesting unless it’s for a title or the Rumble. This was just kind of there for the sake of getting a lot of people on the card at the same time, which is stupid when a lot of them have matches later. Not sure what the point was here.

Light Heavyweight Title Tournament Semi-Final: Badstreet vs. Brian Pillman

Badstreet is a member of the Freebirds and is Brad Armstrong in a mask. They threw gimmick after gimmick at him in hopes of getting him over. It didn’t work, but that’s old school style to say the least. This is Pillman’s return to WCW match after being the Yellow Dog (masked guy, everyone knew who he was) forever. Four man tournament apparently. Oh apparently he got a first round bye. That helps a little.

Badstreet cheats of course while Pillman continues to be about five years ahead of his time with his Cruiserweight style stuff. Slingshot sunset flip gets two as we can hear the director. Dropkick to the apron sets up a suplex back into the ring for Pillman, but Badstreet counters into a suplex to the floor in a pretty nice move. That isn’t a DQ though as we change the rules again.

Brian is sent into the railing as Badstreet takes over a bit. Up to the apron again and Pillman is sent into the post. After a good long rest for him because Badstreet is kind of stupid, Pillman gets a slingshot cross body for two. Neckbreaker gets two for the masked dude. Pillman dropkicks him off the top and adds in a suicide dive to the floor. Missile dropkick misses but a spinwheel kick gets two, both by Pillman. Badstreet gets a DDT for two. Crucifix by Brian is countered into a Samoan Drop and up they go. Pillman knocks him off the top and a top rope cross body (Air Pillman) ends this.

Rating: B+. AWESOME match here and keep in mind that this is 1991. This is something that would have been awesome in 1997 and yet they were doing it years early. It’s scary to think of what Pillman could have done if he hadn’t destroyed his ankle. Really liked this one and the whole thing worked very well. Great match.

WCW Top Ten:

10. Bobby Eaton
9. Z-Man
8. Diamond Stud
7. One Man Gang
6. Dustin Rhodes
5. Steve Austin
4. El Gigante
3. Barry Windham
2. Ron Simmons
1. Sting

World Champion: Lex Luger.

They did this every week and it really never meant much. Naturally they hyped it forever because that’s how WCW rolls.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Sting

Badd is the gay character that we don’t say is gay. He’s also heel (mostly) and undefeated. Sting is US Champion here but it’s non-title. He also doesn’t seem to have the belt with him but whatever. This was during the gift box angle which was about Luger vs. Sting eventually. They shake hands to start as Badd wants to use his left hand. Sting plants him but a Vader Bomb (maybe that’s why the feuded!!!) gets knees.

Sting no sells it and Badd hits his top rope sunset flip for two. Sting gets a small package for two as this is a rather fast paced match. And now we slow things WAY down as it’s a wristlock fight. It’s so weird to think that this is nearly twenty years old. Sting grabs an armbar as this has gotten boring in a hurry.

As Badd pops off some punches that miss, another gift box is delivered. Stinger Splash misses and Badd gets his left hand, but it’s just to the ribs. Badd thinks the box is for him and turns his back on Sting but the more famous dude is too hurt to capitalize. Sting sees the box now as the match stops completely. Sting grabs an AWFUL small package to end it.

Rating: D. Other than the fast paced opening, this was them just waiting on the whole box angle to happen. Once that happened, the whole thing came to the fastest screeching halt you’ll ever see. Boring match overall as Badd was a comedy guy and Sting was never in any danger here.

Post match Cactus Jack pops out of the box, apparently debuting and massacring Sting with a top rope elbow to the floor and the double arm DDT. Eaton and Big Josh run out for the save. They wouldn’t have their blowoff match for about 9 months, but dang it was worth the wait.

Light Heavyweight Title Tournament Semi-Final: Mike Graham vs. Richard Morton

Morton is part of the York Foundation and is managed by Alexandra York, more famous as Terri. Morton looks exactly the same as he did in the Rock N Roll Express so the heel turn didn’t really work. Graham is the son of Eddie Graham, who is considered one of the best bookers ever and was based in Florida. Morton gets a Boston Crab after starting on his back. Not bad.

They trade some pin and submission attempts so Morton hits the floor for awhile. He checks what the computer tells him to do (just go with it) and heads back in. They head to the mat and this is rather boring already. Graham gets something resembling a German suplex out of the corner for two. Morton takes over for a bit before Graham grabs a Figure Four. Not that it matters as Morton is in the ropes so we’re back to the uninteresting wrestling.

Graham is painfully boring in the ring. That’s really all there is to it about him. He’s here because his dad is famous and that’s about it. He throws on an Indian Deathlock as the fans flat out do not care at all. They need to end this match already. Apparently Graham used to put holds on Gordon Solie. Random but ok. Rolling half nelson gets two for Graham. York gets on the apron which doesn’t mean much of anything. Morton rolls him up and uses the tights to advance to the finals.

Rating: D. Really boring match here as nothing of interest was going on at all. Graham is really boring and Morton is a failure as a heel for the most part. I mean, cut your hair or something dude. Really boring match that no one cared about for the most part here. It set up the match at the PPV I guess, but that doesn’t mean it’s worth seeing.

Time for Bill Kazmaier, a legit winner of the World’s Strongest Man, is going to attempt to break a world record. What record this is we don’t really establish but that’s not really important. He’s in the tag title final later on tonight so I smell an angle here. Four guys bring out a big globe thing but Kazmaier is going to bend a rod over his head instead. Somehow this is a record. The bar bends but here are the Enforcers (Zbyszko and Anderson) who are in the title match with Kaz and Rick Steiner later. They hit him in the ribs with a weight and leave. Hey I was right.

Freebirds vs. Patriots

The Patriots are Todd Champion and Firebreaker Chip. They’re from WCW Special Forces, whatever that’s supposed to be. The Birds are doing their rock band gimmick here. One Patriot is a soldier and one is a fireman. Ok then. Hayes vs. Chip to start us off. Hayes naturally stalls because that’s what he does. Ross makes baseball comparisons because he has nothing else to do.

The Birds are the US Tag Champions and will defend against the Patriots on Saturday. Why they’re not doing it here? Who knows of course. The Patriots clear the ring as this isn’t going to be much of a match methinks. Garvin vs. Chip now and it’s pretty clear that the Patriots aren’t that good. We begin a rather boring match as neither team have guys you want to run a match. Off to Champion who beats on the actual champion known as Hayes. Everything breaks down and with some heel cheating, Garvin pins Chip. The Patriots would get the titles Saturday.

Rating: D. That grade is becoming a standard for this show somehow. Weak match again as neither team had any idea of what they were doing. That being said also, why in the world would we have this match be non-title on whatever night this is and then have the title match like three days later? It’s WCW. I guess that’s why.

Here’s Paul E. Dangerously to talk to Cactus Jack. Jack won’t say who the mastermind is but wants a round of applause for Sting because his career is OVER. Another gift box comes out which Jack says has Abdullah in it. Naturally as Jack goes to give him a hug it’s Sting in the box and the fight is on. These two would feud on and off for a long time before their classic in June which is still one of my all time favorite matches.

We get a clip of Ron Simmons having his jersey retired at Florida State. Bobby Bowden, the coach of Florida State, says Simmons is awesome.

Ron Simmons vs. Diamond Stud

Stud is more famous as Scott Hall. So let’s see. Hall is a guy who has something to do with diamonds and Nash is Oz. As in Wizard of Oz. There’s nothing hidden to it as he was billed as being from the Emerald City. A few years later they told Austin and Foley there was no way to market them. And people wonder why they went out of business. Simmons is currently on a roll and is signing the contract for the world title match later.

Stud jumps him to start and Simmons pretends to actually be in trouble here. That’s so cute. Simmons starts hammering away but walks into a half Rock Bottom/half chokeslam for two. Middle rope bulldog hits but Stud poses to get rolled up for two. Simmons starts his comeback and there’s the spinebuster. Shoulder block and we’re done quick. Simmons was on the roll of a lifetime here but wouldn’t win the title for almost a year. No rating due to length but it was just a workout for Simmons.

Dangerously talks to Simmons post match and he says he’ll accomplish his dream. Harley Race and Mr. Hughes come out and Simmons says he wants Luger, not them.

Terrance Taylor vs. Van Hammer

Hammer is debuting here and would become arguably the third most popular guy in the company and maybe even the second. What do you think is going to happen here? Taylor hammers away and Hammer no sells it. Hammer gets something close to We Will Rock You going and a top rope knee drop ends this. Seriously, that’s his finisher? Total squash.

Missy Hyatt finally gets her interview in the locker room of Luger. She’s been trying to do this for months and Simmons interrupts this one too. They throw him out so he breaks the door down. This goes nowhere.

TV Title: Steve Austin vs. Z-Man

Austin is champion and still has the old NWA style TV Title. Austin’s tights look like they have confetti on them. Z-Man is a former champion also. Basic match to start as Austin has his arm worked on. They ram into each other with Austin’s blonde hair flowing. That’s a weird thing to see indeed. Lots of headlocks follow as this isn’t much of a match at all.

When I say that I mean there’s no real effort here. They’re having a match and while they’re not doing anything particularly wrong, you can tell there’s almost no effort at all in it. They’re going through the motions out there with a lot of arm work and all that jazz. Z-Man hits a superkick and Austin stalls a lot. Slingshot cross body to the ramp hits but a top rope one misses completely.

Off to the chinlock to waste some time. Austin had a habit of trying to milk the clock as much as he could which I guess is what he’s trying to do here. There’s the Stun Gun (flapjack onto the top rope) but Austin doesn’t cover. Small package gets two for Z and we hit the sleeper. Austin’s chick named Lady Blossom gives him an object and we’re done.

Rating: D+. Boring match until the end and the whole thing didn’t work at all for the most part. Like I said they were going through the motions the entire time. Zenk (What do you think the Z stood for?) was a guy that was ok at times but at other times he was rather boring indeed, with this being one of those times.

We get a video on Ron Simmons giving a speech to some kids.

Time for the contract signing but Luger wants to wait awhile first. While we wait, here’s another video on Simmons bringing some kids to the Omni to see him wrestle.

Here’s the actual signing and Luger is ready. They do this on the stage instead of in the ring for once. Ron signs up as Dusty Rhodes is there for no apparent reason. Literally, the announcers are asking why he’s there. Luger gives a quick promo and just get to the brawl already. Things get interesting as Luger mentions that Simmons can be the first black champion but when he loses, Simmons can be Lex’s driver. Playing the race card is kind of interesting.

We recap the tag title tournament in reverse which is weird but it fills in time.

World Tag Titles: Enforcers vs. Bill Kazmaier/Rick Steiner

The Steiners had to drop the titles because Scott got hurt so this is a tournament final. Kaz is hurt from earlier so that’ll probably play into the ending. We’re rapidly running out of time here with entrances still going on and less than seven minutes in the show. Rick clears the ring to start and it’s more or less a handicap match due to the rib injury. Powerslam takes Anderson down for two.

Kaz is just chilling on the apron while it’s 2-1. So why is he here anyway? Larry works on the arm and amazingly doesn’t stall. Off to Anderson as the Enforcers talk trash to Kaz. Really basic match here as Steiner can’t fight off the numbers. Steiner gets a suplex to take Anderson down but can’t get a belly to belly off the middle rope. Kaz tags himself in but Anderson gets a shot in to the ribs for Larry to fall on top for the titles. Barely ran three minutes.

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this again? Did we really need all the earlier matches on here for the sake of having a three minute title match in the main event? Kaz never meant anything but he looked good so that’s about all he had. Scott would be back soon enough, but this was pretty worthless.

The Enforcers brag to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was pretty awful as they more or less phoned the whole thing in. 91 in WCW was pretty awful as they had very little thinking in their entire show with this being no exception at all. Sting would feud with everyone at the same time more or less, but this would be put on hold as the Dangerous Alliance would form at Halloween Havoc to make things really awesome in a hurry. This however, wasn’t awesome at all. Not worth seeing at all.

 

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #15: I Apologize For This Show’s Pun

Clash of the Champions 15: Knocksville USA
Date: June 12, 1991
Location: Civic Auditorium, Knoxville, Tennessee
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

Let’s get the most important thing out of the way first: that is a very dumb pun for a title. This is a weird show for WCW as Flair was on his way out due to WCW being really stupid. The main event is Flair defending the title against Bobby Eaton in a 2/3 falls match which should be awesome. This is a very old school style show in that there are a lot of matches but most of them are short. Let’s get to it.

Missy Hyatt opens the show but Paul E. Dangerously (Heyman) comes out to wonder why he wasn’t told they were going live.

Young Pistols/Z-Man vs. Freebirds

The Pistols are Steve Armstrong/Tracy Smothers and the Birds are Hayes/Garvin/Badstreet, who is Brad Armstrong, Steve’s real life brother, under a mask. The Freebirds are US Tag Champions here and have two managers: Big Daddy Dink who is more famous as Oliver Humperdink and Diamond Dallas Page who is more famous as Diamond Dallas Page. Garvin vs. Z-Man to start us off.

Bill Alfonso, as in Fonzie from ECW, is the referee. Everything breaks down quickly and the good guys clear the ring. Smothers vs. Hayes now and Smothers takes over. The Birds beat the Pistols at SuperBrawl for the titles so there’s a history there. The ring gets cleared out again and it’s off to Garvin again. Badstreet comes in and Smothers evades all of them for awhile until Badstreet sends him to the floor. Smothers takes a hot shot onto the railing and Z-Man is down too for some reason. Everything breaks down again and the three good guys are thrown out twice. They come back in and hit three stereo sunset flips for the pin.

Rating: C. We’ll ignore that the ending was totally illegal because it was kind of a cool looking thing. The match wasn’t bad and was there to get the crowd into the show which is the whole point. The Pistols never did much of anything and Z-Man either had just lost the TV Title or was about to get it. After that he didn’t do much either. These guys had nothing else to do so throw them in a tag match. That’s old school booking 103.

Enter the Great American Bash Ric Flair Sweepstakes for a chance to meet Ric Flair who was in the WWF by that time! That’s the final WCW PPV I’m going to review also as it’s possibly the worst show ever.

Oz vs. Johnny Rich

Oz is just what he sounds like: a character based on the Wizard of Oz. He comes out of a castle that is so real you can see it shake from the smoke machines. He has the Great Wizard (Kevin Sullivan) with him and Oz himself is more famous as Kevin Nash. You might ask why this character exists. That would be because Ted Turner’s TBS station had acquired the rights to the film Wizard of Oz. Seriously, that’s it. After the big slow entrance, Nash wrestles a faster version of what he usually does, totally missing the point. He finishes with an Eye of the Storm (James Storm’s move) which is called the Emerald City Slam. Just a squash here.

PN News is coming. Oh dear. He’s a guy the size of Mark Henry and a very white rapper.

Dan Spivey vs. Big Josh

Josh is a lumberjack that danced with bear cubs. Are you starting to get why this period was AWFUL for WCW? Spivey is really tall so this is power vs. power. Neither guy is very good and this is almost all punching. Spivery gets a big boot but walks into a suplex. They miscommunicate on something and Josh gets a German for no cover. Here’s Kevin Sullivan still in his Wizard stuff to break a crutch over Josh’s back and a German suplex pins him. This was nothing.

The WCW Top Ten:
1. Lex Luger
2. Great Muta
3. El Gigante
4. Bobby Eaton
5. Nikita Koloff
6. Sting
7. Arn Anderson
8. Barry Windham
9. One Man Gang
10. Steve Austin

All are under Flair of course.

Here’s the Danger Zone which is Dangerously’s talk segment. He brings out Jason Hervey because that little fungus has to be on every WCW show EVER. Heyman won’t let him say anything other than like one word. They talk about the Wonder Years and Dangerously says Hervey is dating Missy Hyatt who Dangerously feuded with forever. Hervey gets mad and gets hit with the phone so Missy comes out for the save.

Terrance Taylor vs. Dustin Rhodes

Rhodes is REALLY young here and not that good. Taylor is the Computerized Man of the 90s and part of the York Foundation. He has Alexandra York with him who is more famous as Terri Runnels plus Mr. Hughes. Rhodes is undefeated which I’m sure has nothing to do with his fat daddy booking things. There’s going to be a new member of the Foundation tonight.

Dustin beats the tar out of him to start but misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Isn’t that always the way for overly perky faces. Taylor gets a bottom rope suplex of all things back in for two. Gutwrench powerbomb gets the same. Dustin fights back and hits the Flip Flop and Fly to take over. He hits the bulldog but Hughes gets up on the apron. Ricky Morton is here for some reason and the match is thrown out. Morton beats Dustin down and he’s the new member of the Foundation.

Rating: D. This was nothing other than a way for Morton to come in for the turn at the end. Rhodes and the Foundation feuded for a long time as Robert Gibson was recovering from a knee injury. This wasn’t a very good match as Dustin was the boss’ son and that’s about it. No one was interested in it but the turn at the end was a nice touch.

Big Josh makes the save.

Johnny B. Badd is coming. His character is gay but we’re not going to say that because it’s 1991.

We recap Nikita Koloff jumping Sting by mistake at the first SuperBrawl to end the classic tag match. This set up a huge feud which is being blown off here.

Sting vs. Nikita Koloff

I remember these two having a chain match later so maybe this isn’t the blowoff. Sting runs to the ring and is pounded down quickly. No one ever accused Sting of being the brightest guy in the world. Koloff hits a flying tackle and Sting is in big trouble. Out to the floor and Sting goes into the railing. Out of nowhere Sting hits a piledriver but Koloff is up first.

Koloff drops him on his head with a tombstone for two. He kicks at the ribs and blocks a sunset flip. The second attempt works and Sting gets two. Koloff hammers on the ribs again and the extended squash continues. Nikita even throws in an evil laugh because he’s foreign and foreign people are bad. Out to the floor and Sting manages to reverse Koloff into the barricade. Back inside Sting hits a tombstone of his own and makes his comeback. He fires away with that unique style of offense of his but the Splash misses and Koloff loads up the Sickle but Sting ducks and grabs a rollup for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C. The crowd was WAY into this but the match was pretty dull. Koloff just didn’t care anymore at this point as his wife had passed away a few years before and he wanted out of wrestling to run his gym. He would be gone pretty soon after the Bash and would come back for a summer run in WCW before retiring for good. The crowd carried this a lot and it helped keep the match from being worse than it should have been.

PN News and the chicks from Salt N Peppa are here to rap. This is……well let’s go with William Regal will win a grammy for best rapping before this guy. Johnny B. Badd and Teddy Long appear and talk about how they’re tired of being held down or something. Badd leaves and this is worthless.

Diamond Studd is coming. In a year or so he would imitate Al Pacino from Scarface and call himself Razor Ramon.

Barry Windham/Arn Anderson vs. El Gigante/Brian Pillman

Whoever takes the fall is out of WCW. Brian vs. Arn to get us going in a future battle of the Horsemen. Off to Windham who pounds him down but a spin kick gets two for Pillman. Back to Arn and I guess we’re waiting on the hot tag to Gigante, kind of like when Giant and Sullivan beat up Anderson and Benoit in 96. They can’t beat Gigante so avoid him at all costs. He gets his hand in on Anderson but Windham makes the save.

They do the Andre/Snuka spot for a cross body for two on Windham. Gigante and Anderson go to the floor as Pillman is shoved off the top and Windham kicks him in the face for the pin. Not long enough to rate but Pillman was back in a mask by the PPV which was one of those things where everyone knew who he was but it was a joke or something.

Great American Bash report, which was a tour but there was a PPV for one night of the show.

We get a clip from the ending of Bash 90 with Sting taking the title off Flair. Also stuff from the Steiners beating the Freebirds.

Clip from the WCW/New Japan Supershow where the Steiners won the IWGP Tag Titles.

IWGP Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Hiroshi Hase/Masahiro Chono

Hase vs. Scott to start and Hase hits an enziguri (called a karate kick) to send Steiner to the floor. Steiner takes a beating so it’s off to Rick who is more popular here. Chono comes in and hits the Mafia Kick and then a second one. A third one can’t put Rick down so he hits a Steiner Line instead. Off to Scott and the Steiners hit a move that would have been a cool finisher for another team but for the Steiners it’s just another move. Scott sets for an Outsider’s Edge and Rick drops a top rope elbow at the same time to drive Chono down.

Off to Hase and the American hits a German on the Japanese dude. Rick’s headset is coming off. But how will he know when to breathe without the voice telling him when to inhale? (Why else would he wear that thing?) It’s off to the rookie Chono which is weird to say. He recently had a match with Lou Thesz of all people and hooks in an STF to prove it. Scott and Hase fight on the floor as Rick has been in the hold about 30 seconds. Scott gets to the apron and comes off the top, missing completely to the point where he has to break it up again.

Scott comes back in and runs over Hase so he can hit a butterfly bomb for two. There’s a belly to belly off the top for two and Hase is about dead. Chono saves and a dragon suplex gets two. This is getting a lot better as it goes on. The Japanese try an Irish on the American but Rick pulls Chono out so Scott can hit a Frankensteiner on Hase for the pin. JR’s American spirit pops out as he FREAKS about the Steiners retaining.

Rating: B. Very good match here as the Japanese team was all over the place with cool suplexes and the Steiners were more than capable of hanging with them, which gave us something that you almost never saw in America at this point. Hase would team with Muta to take the titles from the Steiners later in the year.

Post match, the Hardliners, Dick Slater and Dick Murdoch, come out and beat up both teams. During the beatdown they legit injured Scott’s arm. He had to have surgery and wasn’t ever really the same. Keep in mind that this was when WCW basically had the world title on standby for him whenever he was ready to break up the Steiners, so this was a pretty big deal.

Diamond Studd vs. Tommy Rich

Total squash and Rich’s only offense is some basic stuff after getting his knees up on a Vader Bomb. Razor’s Edge ends it. This lasted about 90 seconds.

A kid won a Sting look-a-like contest. He gets to meet Sting. The kid freaks out so this is kind of cool. Koloff jumps him, setting up the rematch at the Bash. That’s where the chain match was. I knew it happened somewhere.

US Title: Great Muta vs. Lex Luger

Luger is champion and the winner gets the title and the world title shot at the Bash. Muta spits out some mist before the match begins. There’s nothing really going on as far as flow to it but it’s big star vs. big star. Luger uses his power stuff but misses an elbow so Muta can stomp away. A gorilla press puts Muta down but Lex misses a charge and takes a big kick. The handspring elbow misses and Muta crashes to the floor. At least that looked cool. Back in Muta loads up the mist but Luger comes up with a counter that somehow no one else ever thought of: he covers his eyes. A powerslam ends this five seconds later.

Rating: D. Match sucked but I’m more impressed by that block. I mean, of all people, LEX LUGER is the clever one??? Even with all these reviews I can still be surprised. Anyway Lex would go on to main event the Bash in a match I can’t wait to get to for how stupid it is. Muta would go back to Japan and would only appear on occasion.

There’s a guy coming to WCW. His name is Steve Austin. Wait….he’d be TV Champion at this point. I’m going to give up trying to figure out WCW. It’ll add years on to my life.

Steve Austin vs. Joey Maggs

Oh ok he had won the title but the episode hadn’t aired yet. Austin’s manager is a chick named Lady Blossom who has a chest that is probably bigger than Trish’s and still works. Austin hits the Stun Gun and we’re done in about 40 seconds.

We continue the Coming Attractions thing which is what they’ve been using to talk about new people all night. This is for Black Blood, which is Billy Jack Haynes as an executioner.

Richard Morton is introduced as the newest member of the York Foundation. He’s in a suit with the rocker hair. He talks about not having to sign autographs anymore. Gibson comes out and is medically cleared now. Morton beats him up and piledrives him. Dustin Rhodes comes out for the save. This might have lasted a minute.

WCW World Title: Bobby Eaton vs. Ric Flair

2/3 falls. Feeling out process to start and Eaton gets in a slap to tick Flair off. A clothesline puts Flair outside and they’re going slow to start but they have enough time for it. Back in Flair gets him in the corner and Eaton isn’t a big enough face to shrug those off. Eaton fires away on him and there’s a Flair Flop. Bobby grabs a shortarm scissors and I’m not sure if that would hurt or not.

There’s a little old lady in the front row that is having a blast. Flair keeps getting a little rush of offense but Eaton counters it every time. Flair sends him into the corner and Eaton’s head might have hit the post. That’s enough for Flair as he goes in with his usual stuff. After working over the arm for a bit they get back up and slug it out with Eaton taking over again. Flair goes up and Ross makes a joke about how that never works.

Flair Flip in the corner and a right hand takes him down. Something like a Boss Man Slam into a backbreaker puts Flair down and a big swinging neckbreaker looks to set up the Alabama Jam. It’s a top rope legdrop and it puts Eaton up 1-0. There’s a thirty second rest period between falls. They slug it out again and Flair can’t keep up with him.

Backslide gets two. Eaton hits another neckbreaker and goes up again but Flair pops up this time and in a smart move, Eaton comes back in instead of going up. Flair is put down again but as Eaton goes up he gets shoved off and hits his knee on the floor, causing a count-out to tie things up.

Back in Eaton hits a superplex but can’t capitalize because of the knee. Eventually the cover gets two and Flair sets for the knee crusher. For absolutely no apparent reason he picks Eaton up for it….and suplexes him instead. He has the knee held back too so it was clearly that move. Anyway Flair goes after the knee and gets the Figure Four after two failed attempts. After a few moments in there, Flair grabs the ropes and Eaton blacks out from the pain for the pin and Flair retains.

Rating: B. It’s a good match and the first fall is by far the best. Eaton was a very good hand for WCW and you could throw him in for a quick TV title shot like this and get a good result like this. Flair working on the knee makes sense and after sitting through a show this long and boring, this was probably a bit high but I don’t care at this point. The show is over and that’s all that matters.

JR and Tony wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event is good and the tag match was good, but MAN the rest of this show is dull. These new guys that were being brought in had no real stories to them or anything like that and as a result, no one was all that interested in them. This all led up to the Bash which is absolutely dreadful. Anyway this was another weak show but 91 wasn’t a kind year to WCW. Sting vs. Koloff was a huge feud but this match was nothing worth seeing. Bad show but it has its moments.

 

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #14: Oh Hamburgers It’s 1991 WCW

Clash of the Champions 14: Dixie Dynamite
Date: January 31, 1991
Location: Georgia Mountains Center, Gainsville, Georgia
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Dusty Rhodes

Another one of these and it’s from a pretty bad era for the company. Unlike the one later this year, this show looks atrocious on paper. This is the first one in WCW rather than the NWA so I would expect a few changes. Also Dusty is the booker again so expect the Dusty Finish to abound. The main event is Scott Steiner vs. Ric Flair for the title. I’m not exactly riveted either. Let’s get to it.

After a quick look at the top two matches we get a very 80s opening. You can tell the arena is tiny. I wonder if AJ was there.

National Anthem.

Dusty talks a lot and won’t shut up.

Sting/Lex Luger vs. Doom

Luger is of course US Champion here as he more or less always was. I love that old Sting music. And then again the same can be said of Doom’s music. They’re the tag team champions here in the longest reign in the history of the belts. Ron Simmons and Butch Reed if you weren’t familiar with that. This isn’t announced as a title match but the referee holds up the belts. I guess it is one then.

Reed vs. Sting to start us off. Sting overpowers Reed which is rather impressive. Even in an armbar he shouts to the crowd. Notice what he’s doing there: he doesn’t let the crowd get taken out of it, even in a rest hold. That’s a very nice thing to do. Luger in now as Dusty talks a lot. Ross says in about 5 seconds what it took Dusty 30 to say. We hear about Wrestlewar a little bit where Luger is defending the title.

Simmons vs. Luger now and Ron can’t take him down with shoulders. You can see Simmons wanting to shout his catchphrase. Luger dominates him with power. How often do you see Doom losing to power stuff? Luger walks into a hot shot though and the champions take over. After a break it’s still Doom in control.

Simmons puts his head down though and Luger manages to get a knee/kick in to put Ron down. Simmons gets the tag though to bring in Reed who hits a dropkick of all things to take down Luger. Dusty talks about football to waste even more time. Luger finally takes down Simmons but Reed drills him with a top rope shoulder block to take him right back down. The problem is that it took him right down into his corner. Well isn’t that always the way?

Sting comes in to clean house but Dan Spivey runs out of the crowd to take down Luger. Spivey was Luger’s upcoming opponent at the PPV if I didn’t mention that. Sting doesn’t seem to care and beats up Doom on his own. Reed hits a shoulder to Simmons by mistake and he stumbles into the referee. The referee gets up in time to see Sting get thrown over the top for the CHEAP DQ.

Rating: C. Well it was fun while it lasted but I’ve never been able to stand that over the top rule. This was kind of a backdrop for the Spivey vs. Luger match but that didn’t exactly work. It was ok I guess but the match didn’t really go anywhere and the titles never felt like they were in danger at all.

We unveil the winner of the WCW’s Sexiest Wrestler award. It’s Z-Man. Next.

TV Title: Z-Man vs. Bobby Eaton

Z-Man is champion here. They REALLY crank in chants for Bobby here. Either that or 2000 people can chant louder for Bobby Eaton than they can for Goldberg. Dusty talks about how great both guys are. I can see why Z-Man won the sexiest wrestler thing. Apparently Zenk had already lost the title at a TV Taping so this shouldn’t really mean much at all. This is live mind you so imagine his mindset.

Dusty’s voice gets REALLY old when he’s comfortable which he definitely is here. The problem is that he talks A LOT. Eaton works the arm a bit but goes up and Z-Man hits a sweet dropkick to send him to the floor. And then Dusty talks about how great Brian Pillman is for no apparent reason. He also can’t wait to remind us that he’s a former TV Champion either.

They start slugging it out as Dusty is getting harder and harder to ignore. We hit a test of strength as Ross says Terry Taylor is a tough guy. Oh dear. If this is the show I think it is we get another stupid moment in WCW history coming up very soon. As Dusty talks about getting hit in the head with a stick, Eaton goes up again and gets caught one more time.

Superkick puts Eaton down. Big backdrop and Eaton is in trouble. Who covers someone off a backdrop? Who does he think he is, Moolah? Eaton gets him down and manages to get the top rope knee drop but Z-Man gets to the ropes. Cradle gets two for the champion but he walks into a neckbreaker that gets two for Eaton.

You can see fans leaving for the concession stand. Nice to see a title match has them so enthralled. Z-Man gets a freaking back slide of all things to get the pin to retain. Eaton’s shoulder might have been up though so expect another match before the airing of Arn winning the title.

Rating: C+. This started out slow but it got a lot better once they picked up the pace a bit. Eaton is a guy that is straight up underrated in wrestling as he consistently put on great match after great match. This was fine for what it was, even though it would have been understandable for Z-Man to do next to nothing out there.

The replay shows that it wasn’t even close with Eaton completely kicking out before three. That was pretty bad.

Alexandra York (Terri) says that she has selected the newest member of the York Foundation (computer assisted heel group that more or less sucked) and we’ll see him tonight.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Allen Iron Eagle/Tommy Rich

I don’t know who Eagle is either. This is Garvin and Hayes. The Birds are heels here but good luck getting a team called the Freebirds booed in Georgia. Dang it now I’m going to have Badstreet USA stuck in my head all day. Hayes and Rich start as we actually get a reference to the world title reign of Rich. Eagle is another Indian character.

The Indian character of course chops a lot. I’m stunned too. Garvin does….something and down goes Eagle. Eagle ducked his head like he was going for a backdrop and Garvin ran up to him to set for a DDT (finisher) but Eagle just fell backwards. Weird as heck  but whatever. We hit the chinlock as this isn’t much at all. Hayes punches him and it sounds great. Eagle forgets to sell and just stands there, making him one of the worst guys I’ve seen in a long time.

Dusty and Jim try desperately to say that Eagle was stunned from the move and it’s just funny as can be. Anyway, Hayes is ticked and beats the tar out of him on the floor with some hard stuff. When Michael Hayes is the ring general, you know you’re in real trouble. Dusty of course talks about being able to go down Badstreet and be ok because he’s tough.

Amazingly enough they manage to screw up something else with Eagle not realizing that Garvin is supposed to be doing a blind charge so Garvin has to throw up a knee to save the spot. Everyone comes in and we get an awkward looking kick to the guy before an awkward looking sunset flip sets up the tag to Rich that isn’t seen. The Birds DDT the heck out of Eagle to end it, thankfully.

Rating: D-. This is a horrible match, but it’s one of those matches where you can laugh at it very hard. The match is bad, don’t get me wrong, but Eagle was so bad that he was hilarious. There were at least 5 botched spots in a seven minute match. Let that sink in for a bit. It really was that bad.

Dusty talks to Paul E. Dangerously about the arm wrestling match tonight with Missy Hyatt and implies that Paul is gay. Dusty of course has more to talk about which is what he’s there for. Dusty’s comments here are flat out sexist but it’s Georgia so he can get away with it I guess. Somehow Heyman gets into I Have A Dream. Moving on.

Joey Maggs vs. Sid Vicious

What do you think is going to happen here? Sid brings his own paramedics with him if that tells you anything. Sid’s hometown of Anywhere He Darn Well Pleases is still great stuff. He’s a Horseman here too. A clothesline and powerbomb end this in maybe a minute. Sid was a bit of a nut but that powerbomb was sweet every time. The paramedics come out and we take a break. Back with Sid beating up Maggs some more on the stretcher. That’s kind of awesome.

Tony talks to Sid who says everyone fears him.

Ricky Morton vs. Terry Taylor

Here’s another one of WCW’s famous goofs. Terry Taylor is introduced as the Computerized Man of the 90s. That would be all fine and good except for one thing: That was his name once he turned heel. The problem is that the heel turn was that the heel turn hadn’t happened yet, completely giving away the ending of the match. Why did Capetta (ring announcer) even have that on his card? What sense does that even begin to make? Early 90s WCW is made fun of a lot, but it’s not really a secret as to why is it?

Taylor wants respect or something, also giving a good indication of the already spoiled heel turn. Robert Gibson is injured here which would eventually lead to Morton joining the York Foundation as well. Technical/feeling out process to start with no one being able to get a distinct advantage. Nice arm drags by Morton. They speed things up a bit but still no one can get an advantage.

We take a break as Taylor hits the floor to break the momentum. Back with Terry holding an armbar. Nice jawbreaker by Morton has Taylor in trouble though as they’re going back and forth rather nicely here. Dusty of course can’t stop talking long enough for Ross to talk about the match but it’s Dusty’s show so who cares? Alexandra York comes down now as we’re not sure who she’s here for. Apparently no one was listening to the intros either.

For no apparent reason we get an inset promo from York, saying that Taylor is indeed the newest member of the York Foundation and that her computer has told her how he’s going to win this. That was the gimmick of the Foundation: the computer would predict the outcome of the match, such as here where it says the time of the fall and what Taylor will win with. It’s as dumb as it sounds.

Morton gets a small package for two as Taylor turns heel and wrestles all evil and such. A bad bulldog gets two for Taylor. It amazes me that they had wireless so early in the 90s. Morton hammers away in the corner and gets a suplex for two. Dropkick puts Taylor down but a second misses and Morton hits the mat rather hard, allowing Taylor to steal the pin.

Rating: C. It’s ok and the early part is good but other than that this was kind of flat. Morton’s singles time was kind of awkward as he was definitely the better half of the team but he wasn’t someone people wanted to see without his partner. This was ok but nothing really all that special.

We get a preview of the Japanese women’s wrestling at WrestleWar. And 8 seconds is all we get of that.

We see Sting getting the Wrestler of the Year award which allegedly was totally rigged or something.

Dusty talks (naturally) about the Gulf War and praises the troops. The war had just ended or was about to end which messed up the Wrestlemania plans Vince had. How dare international politics and wars get in the way of Wrestlemania??? Didn’t Sadaam watch Superstars?

Ranger Ross vs. El Cubano

Ross is a military dude that would be gone soon after this and in prison for robbery, domestic violence, embezzlement and attempted arson by 1996. Somehow an evil masked Communist is looking like a good guy all of a sudden. Cubano is just a masked guy that is apparently Cuban. In an inset interview Ross praises the troops as well.

Apparently if you can see a guy’s face you can read their mind. This is of course according to Dusty. JR says that Ross (the wrestler that is) is a great role model for anyone of any color. Really? The color line was needed there? Cubano misses a top rope splash and Ross sends him to the floor. Ross runs to the ropes and dives over feet first in a plancha type dive. It wasn’t to hit Cubano or anything. That’s just how he left the ring. A rollup ends it maybe 8 seconds later.

Rating: N/A. The odd comments here were more interesting than the match. This went nowhere of course as it was a generic evil guy against Ross who was gone probably before the next PPV. Just a squash.

Ad for WrestleWar and Wargames.

Arn Anderson/Barry Windham vs. Renegade Warriors

The Renegade Warriors are the Youngblood brothers minus Jay who was dead by now. There are massive portraits of the Horsemen behind the ring on the wall. Yeah this isn’t going to be dominance at all. The Warriors jump the Horsemen to start and it’s a big brawl. Sweet merciful crap they look stupid though with their tights being more or less bright plaid.

Windham and one of the Warriors start this off. Arn’s eyes are flat out hilarious. When he gets freaked out you would think he was in a Three Stooges sketch with how freaked out he is. Dusty really likes to remind us that this is in color. Ok Chris is in the singlet. Arn takes him to the mat and works the knee but gets rolled up for two and Arn wants time out.

Off to Barry now and the Horsemen can’t get anything going at all here. Mark beats up Arn a bit. Oh I forgot: the Warriors are Mark and Chris. That might help a bit. Arn gets a spinebuster out of nowhere and the writing is on the wall now. Off to Barry who gets a kind of jumping DDT for two. Dusty rambles about putting your wife in a front facelock and something about a shotgun as Arn and Chris ram heads.

Atomic drop takes care of Chris but they botch Arn’s pump splash out of the corner as he never hits it but he more or less did here since Chris didn’t roll out of the way and barely got a knee up. Mark back in and it’s a big brawl all over again. He gets sent to the floor though and the Horsemen just destroy Chris with a lariat and the superplex for the easy pin.

Rating: D+. Just a long match that wasn’t interesting or anything as we needed seven and a half minutes somehow to show that the Horsemen are awesome over a glorified jobbing tag team. Nothing that terrible but it still wasn’t all that good at all. Too long as it should have been about half this long.

We get a clip of Vader vs. Stan Hansen from Japan which was a freaking war. They’ve having another match at WrestleWar. Hansen, tobacco flowing everywhere, says that it’ll be a real war between real men at the PPV.

Buddy Lee Parker vs. Brian Pillman

Parker is the guy that trained Goldberg and is widely considered to be one of the biggest jerks in the history of wrestling. In short, he was very short and according to Batista had a bad case of Napoleon Syndrome, meaning he hated being small so he tried to use his authority as head of the Power Plant to compensate for it, including telling Batista he had no future in wrestling for some reason. He was a jobber that thought he had meant something in other words.

This is really just a way to talk about WarGames which Pillman is in. He would be the ending of the match as Sid would more or less kill him with a powerbomb and they had to stop the match due to it. Crucifix gets two for Pillman. Even Parker’s basic offense looks bad. Dusty says he has a daughter named Cody. I’ll leave that one alone. Pillman gets a great plancha over the top to take down Parker on the ramp. Top rope cross body ends this squash (notice a theme going on here?) with barely a bit of sweat from Pillman.

Rating: D+. This was a squash but it was a bit longer than the other ones tonight outside of the tag match. Pillman looked great but since he’s in the main event of a PPV shouldn’t we expect that? A squash is fine but what’s the point of having a bunch of them on one show, especially a major one like this? This wasn’t much at all but Pillman’s flying was awesome stuff.

Join the WCW Fan Club!

It’s time to arm wrestle! This was part of the never ending until it ended feud between Paul E. Dangerously and various men as he was feuding with Missy here. Some country DJ is the ring announcer for this. Oh and let’s talk about the troops because that’s just what southern people do. Dangerously being billed as the Psycho Yuppie continues to crack me up.

This is one of the funniest moments in company history as Missy comes out in this big workout jacket but as she is warming up and Paul isn’t looking, Missy takes the jacket off to reveal a low cut top. Heyman’s jaw drops and Hyatt gets the easy win in like two seconds. Funny stuff.

Lawrence Taylor is chilling with the Horsemen at some bar in New Jersey, even though Flair is defending the title tonight in Georgia. This was odd and rather pointless indeed.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Ric Flair

From what I can find, both Flair and Dusty (booking here) came to Scott and flat out said the title is yours, just say the word. Steiner was absolutely awesome at this point and he really was on the verge of shattering the glass ceiling and becoming the top guy in the world. However, he turned them down because it was pretty clear that as soon as his singles push went into effect, Rick was gone. He wouldn’t win the world title for nearly ten years.

Hiro Matsuda is here from NJPW because the first Superbrawl with Fujinami vs. Flair is coming up. El Gigante is here too. Flair won’t shake his hand which resulted in a brief feud between them. Flair has been champion less than three weeks here, getting it back from Sting earlier this month. This has TV time remaining which I’d almost bet anything on that playing into the finish.

Flair shows off his biceps and Steiner is like boy please. Feeling out process to start as you would expect there to be. Steiner counters a top wristlock and Rick gets in Ric’s face as he grabs the ropes. Dusty thinks Scott would like to go into WrestleWar as World Champion. You can’t buy analysis like this people.

Flair hits the floor a bit to buy some time as Scott has been on fire so far. A little more feeling out stuff results in Scott grabbing another armbar. This is some nice technical stuff so far. Flair goes for the knee and Steiner is like oh no you didn’t and clotheslines the tar out of him so Flair hides again. Surprisingly an atomic drop breaks up Steiner’s momentum. I’m surprised his balls can feel anything with all those steroids in him.

Rick shoves Ric’s feet off the ropes when Flair tries to cheat. Is there a reason for those portraits of Anderson and Windham to still be there? Steiner powers out of a cover as we take a break. Back with Steiner throwing the Figure Four on Flair. He’s no Jay Lethal though so he can’t get the tap out. How often do you see a face in control when you come back from a break?

In an awkward looking spot, Flair charges at Steiner but Steiner falls backwards and Flair goes over the ropes. In the awkward part Steiner is supposed to go over also but didn’t have the momentum so after he was stopped he jumped into the air and went over the top. We have ten minutes of TV time left. Flair goes in for the kill on the knee and yells at Rick a lot.

Figure Four goes on and Steiner is in trouble. As we wait for the inevitable reversal, I wonder why the ring ropes were blue, black and yellow. What kind of a weird combination is that? The hold is broken via rope so Flair puts it on again in the middle of the ring. Steiner easily turns is over and we’re back on now.

Flair goes to the floor and Steiner takes him down with a Steiner Line. Down to five minutes remaining. Steiner pounds away in the corner as his leg is ok now. Nick Patrick stops Steiner from punching and Flair a shot in to take over a bit. Ross takes a breath so Dusty talks for a minute or so about how much experience he has in the ring. Under four minutes and Steiner gets a bad sleeper.

Steiner clotheslines Flair over so they alter the rules again so that’s not a DQ with three minutes left. Knee drop by Flair as Steiner is in trouble. Two minutes left and Flair is in the stall mode. Steiner gets a sweet bridge up into a Tiger Bomb but doesn’t cover for no apparent reason.

Ric is on the floor with a minute left. Steiner Line has Flair reeling with 30 seconds left. Flair Flip out of the corner and there’s not enough time. Belly to belly gets two as the bell rings for the time. The whole TV time thing is bogus as we go off the air a minute and a half after TV time expires. Ah ok we needed to show the credits. That explains it. Heaven forbid we don’t know that Ted Turner is responsible for this.

Rating: B. This was good for what it was but with more time it could have been great. Like I said this could have been a title change if Steiner had given it the ok but he decided a tag team was more important. Anyway this was good stuff and it worked rather well considering Steiner didn’t have much big match experience at all. Fun match and interesting for the most part but the ending might as well have been announced at the beginning given how obvious it was.

Overall Rating: D+. Well they tried but at the end of the day there was too much weak stuff here to make this a really good show. The main event is solid but other than that there wasn’t much here at all. Far too many squashes and uninteresting matches for the first hour and a half setting up a good main event doesn’t make a good show though. 91 was really bad for WCW down the line and this was probably the best time for them in the year until the very end of the year. Pretty bad show but the main event is solid. That’s about it.

 

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #12: Can We Get Sting Some Direction Please?

Clash of the Champions 12: Fall Brawl 90
Date: September 5, 1990
Location: Ashville Civic Center, Ashville, North Carolina
Commentators: Bob Caudle, Jim Ross
Attendance: 4,000

We’re kind of in No Man’s Land here with no major show to build to and none to come off of. This is in the Black Scorpion period so you know things are pretty bad. That’s the main event tonight: Sting vs. the Black Scorpion in what I’m sure will be a classic. Other than that you get a Nasty Boys match of all things. Yes the Nasty Boys in 1990. That should be shall we say, interesting? Outside of that….yeah this is going to suck. Let’s get to it.

Side note: this show winds up having a special moment for me which we’ll get to at the end.

Also keep in mind this has zero connection to the PPV series of the same name. This show is also called Mountain Madness.

Jim and Bob run down the card.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

Garvin and Hayes here. We get the music video as it feels like the 80s all over again. You old school fans know what I’m talking about. The Freebirds are faces here which makes me think we might have faces vs. faces here. The Freebirds are the Southern tag champions here which I’m not sure what are. Yep faces vs. faces. This was supposed to be a six man with Bob Armstrong and Buddy Roberts on the respective teams but Roberts has a bad arm so it’s standard.

Hayes and Smothers start us off. The Birds have face paint on which is a different thing for them. Also the ramp is really weird here as it comes to a corner rather than the traditional side of the ring. Ok maybe the Birds are heels but the crowd just likes them. That sounds far more realistic in the South. Smothers hits a nice superkick to send Garvin to the floor. And now the fans think the Birds suck. Maybe it’s just that the crowd is insane.

Armstrong (the Southern Boys are Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers in case the names were confusing you. The Freebirds are Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin) hits a SWEET top rope cross body and the Birds go running. Or is it flying? Everything goes nuts so we kind of restart things with Smothers vs. Hayes again. BIG left hand by Hayes catches Armstrong as he’s on the apron.

I’ve looked around and I have no idea what those tag titles the Birds allegedly hold are. Now the Birds are being booed. Caudle thinks if Robert E. Lee had the Southern Boys during the Civil War Atlanta might have been the capital. They really would have been awesome if they had gotten the Confederacy to switch from Richmond to Atlanta for the capital. Yeah I’m that bored here: I’m making US History corrections.

The Freebirds are credited as being the first team to use rock and roll music for their entrances. Ross mentions that here and for once that’s accurate. Listen to some DVDs and see how many people take credit for being the first to do that. Gorgeous George used theme music back in the 50s but I’m pretty sure the Birds were the first to use rock music. Then again almost everyone in WCCW did that at first so it was either them or the Von Erichs. Again, not much is going on here so I have time for tangents like these. I need to do some WCCW stuff.

Armstrong comes in to clean some house and has a nice dropkick. Bob Armstrong comes in to cheat to counteract Roberts’ cheating. Yep his arm is fine of course. Everything goes nuts and Roberts throws a foreign object to Hayes but a double sunset flip gets the pin for the Southern Boys. The heels beat up Bob Armstrong (Road Dogg’s dad. Steve is his brother) after the match.

Rating: C-. Not a great match at all as it was very start and stop which is rarely a good thing. This wasn’t horrible and the fast paced stuff made it fairly good. Far too many dead spots in there though. Also the double Southern gimmick was just kind of a headscratcher. Crowd is red hot though so this was a good opener from that perspective.

Tony talks to the Steiners who just won the US Tag Titles. Rick in a pink hat works somehow. Scott fumbles through both of his lines. They’re fighting Maximum Overdrive tonight. No one has heard of them, which is probably because they’re a pair of jobbers.

Buddy Landel vs. Mike Rotunda

Rotunda would be gone to become IRS in like a day. Landel is still alive here which amazes me. Rotunda has some chick with him that won a poetry contest held by Burger King. Very different time obviously. Technical stuff to start with nothing really all that special about it thus far. Somewhat botched hip toss by Rotunda and we have a standoff.

Rotunda’s tights have an anchor on them for some reason. A second hip toss works a bit better this time as Landel actually jumps. We somehow slow it down even more here which I didn’t think was possible. They slug it out a bit which is definitely the best part of this so far. But enough of that as we hit the mat again. Rotunda gets up and hooks a freaking backslide to get the pin. Wow that’s not something you see everyday.

Rating: D. Just boring filler here as neither guy meant anything at all. Rotunda turned heel soon after this but was in WWF less than 6 months later. This went nowhere at all and was just about five minutes of wrestling to fill in that much time. Landel was pretty worthless here and was gone soon also.

The Freebirds say they’re awesome and are rather ticked off about life in general. Oh apparently they want the Southern Boys again. We get a video of them in Hollywood as they were supposed to be a big time rock band. Fans mob them and that’s that.

Tim Horner/Brad Armstrong vs. Master Blasters

Brad Armstrong is a very underrated wrestler that oddly enough would hook up with the Freebirds as a masked man soon after this. The Master Blasters are a debuting team of giants, one of which has a huge mowhawk which he would soon shave and replace with black hair. When this team died off he would be repackaged as Vinnie Vegas but then he would get released to go to WWF and become a guy named Diesel, who would eventually become known by his real name: Kevin Nash.

It’s weird seeing Nash look all ripped. Armstrong is called the Candy Man here. Any guesses as to what we’re going to see here? Nash, a power guy named Steel, uses a wristlock. Iron, the dude that did nothing other than be a part of this team, is really bad. You can tell Nash is really green here. Iron misses a falling headbutt so badly the fans loudly boo it. When you can see it that clearly without a video screen that’s a bad sign.

Nash hits a decent powerslam on Armstrong to take him down. His eyes are FREAKY as they’re wide open and very white. Nash works the majority of the match as he’s the one that sucks less here. This Iron guy is horrible. He falls down before a dropkick hits him and can’t take a backdrop properly. Horner comes in and gets about 20 seconds of offense in before Nash crushes him. Double shoulderblock ends Armstrong clean.

Rating: D. Just a squash but Iron was HORRIBLE. Nash wasn’t very good yet but he was passable at least. Horner was a jobber for the most part but was decent enough. Armstrong was a good worker but he was a jobber here so you couldn’t see much of that. This was fine for what it was but nothing special at all.

Brian Pillman is going to start a new contest called the gauntlet. Back in the day there was an NWA show on Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. You would have a match on each show and if you won all three you won $15,000. If you lost the three guys split the money. Kind of a pointless concept but it lasted for awhile. Nothing special though.

Missy Hyatt brings out the “greatest world champion of ever”, Ric Flair. He has a US Title match vs. Luger tonight and is rather over since this is definitely Flair country. Nothing is said here at all.

Jackie Fulton/Terry Taylor vs. Nasty Boys

Fulton is the brother of Bobby Fulton of the Fantastics and did some stuff in Japan. This ends his career highlights. Everyone else I’d think you know. Knobbs and Fulton start us off. This is the debut for the Nasties and of course they would be gone in a few months. Knobbs was in the final three of the 91 Rumble so the couldn’t have been in WCW long after this.

Fulton takes them both down very quickly as the Nasties can’t get much going. Caudle tries to say that Jackie is one of the Fantastics which is incorrect but whatever. Taylor sends Sags into the post as the first time team is winning here surprisingly enough. You would think the Nasties were the jobbers here. Taylor is the key to the match here. Why he’s the key is never explained but apparently he’s the key.

The Nasties take over with the highest extent of their wrestling abilities. Taylor gets a sunset flip for two as Knobbs punches the mat by mistake. Heel miscommunication lets Fulton get the tag. He goes up but Knobbs catches him in a nice powerslam, allowing Sags to hit a top rope elbow to end it.

Rating: C. I can’t believe I’m saying this but the Nasty Boys had an entertaining match. This was kind of an odd debut here but the Nasties looked good near the end. Hardly a great match but I thought it was entertaining enough for about 7 minutes. Power vs. speed is hard to screw up even for the Nasty Boys.

Sid Vicious is here and wants to yell at Sting. Sid was a Horsemen here and wants the title, which are grounds for throwing him out. Just ask Sting if nothing else.

Bill Irwin vs. Tommy Rich

Irwin was the Goon in WWF and something close to a big star in WCCW but is a generic cowboy here. Tommy Rich is the most forgotten world champion ever and we start off fast. Rich hits a dropkick to send Irwin to the floor which Ross ensures us is NOT a DQ because his feet hit the mat first. That makes such little sense I’m not even going to try to make a joke out of it so whatever. We talk about the military for no apparent reason other than Rich is wearing a Confederate style of tights.

Rich hits a jumping headlock takeover which looked like he wanted Irwin to carry him over the threshold or something. Lot of headlocks here. Irwin stomps the same way Lance Storm does with that little hop in his kicks. Rich gets a pretty nice counter to a side slam into a sleeper. Charge misses for Irwin and a Thesz Press gets the pin. As surprising as this may be that is supposed to be a pinning combination. I’m not sure how one move can be a combination but you get the point.

Rating: D+. Far too short to mean much and the headlocks were rather repetitive but they were working rather quickly out there. Rich would join the York Foundation in a rather pointless stable but it had some success. Other than that neither guy meant anything until Rich went to ECW and did some forgettable stuff.

We get the WCW Top Ten.

World Champion: Sting

10. Buddy Landel
9. Tommy Rich
8. Junkyard Dog
7. Flyin Brian
6. Stan Hansen
5. Sid Vicious
4. Barry Windham
3. Arn Anderson
2. Ric Flair
1. Lex Luger

Tag Teams:

World Champions: Doom

10. Rotundo/Horner
9. Junkyard Dog/El Gigante
8. Flyin Bryan/Z-Man
7. Samoan Swat Team
6. Freebirds
5. Southern Boys
4. Midnight Express
3. Horsemen (no members listed)
2. Rock N Roll Express
1. Steiner Brothers

Took a minute to list off and that’s all there is to it. I never got the point of these things.

Stan Hansen is mad that he’s number 6 so he’s going to fight everyone above him.

LPWA World Title: Bambi vs. Susan Sexton

So back in the 80s and early 90s there were a fair amount of women’s wrestling companies. None of them were very good and they had a lot of the same rosters. This is another example of one where they try to get their product on national TV. Susan is champion here but it doesn’t really matter all that much as this won’t be mentioned again. Both are in the old school one piece swimsuit-looking outfits.

Sexton works on the knee early as she’s fairly decent from a technical standpoint. This is all technical stuff which isn’t that interesting but is pretty decent from the standpoint of technique. Sexton does the first move that isn’t technical with a reverse cross body. Boring match so far. Small package by Bambi gets two and is reversed for the pin by Sexton.

Rating: D. Yeah this was pretty pointless. The problem with these companies was that there was absolutely nothing separating these girls once they got in the ring. Today you have companies like SHIMMER where the girls are all distinctly different. These girls had different names and gimmicks but inside the ring they were the same thing, making the company pointless. Pretty worthless match but not terrible.

Maximum Overdrive vs. Steiner Brothers

Overdrive is an unknown team and the Steiners just won the US Tag Titles and are more or less considered the only team in the world capable of touching Doom at this point. What do you think is going to happen here? Scott and one of the jobbers start us off. Scott gets a Sharpshooter without the legs being intertwined. The jobbers names are Hunter and Silencer.

There’s a reason I’ve never heard of them. In the words of Steve Austin, it’s because they absolutely suck. Surprisingly enough Rick seems to be the more popular one here. I know I’m not saying much here but this is just killing time before we get to the end. And there it is as Scott ENDS Hunter with the DDT from the top.

Rating: D-. Again I say so? No one thought there was any kind of chance for the no names here and that’s exactly what the case was. Why should anyone have wanted to see a six minute squash, especially when the other team was awful? They were a jobbing tag team and this was their career highlight. Can we go to something else now?

Missy plugs the Main Event and I want to hit her.

Stan Hansen vs. Z-Man

Hmm what do you think is going to happen here? Z-Man wears pink in this, apparently just wanting Hansen to murder him faster. We’re already on the floor and Hansen pops him with a chair. Hansen is kind of a cross between Austin and JBL when he was a bar fighter. He had a match at a WWF/Japanese (might have been AJPW but I’m not sure) with Hogan and he nearly KILLED Fink. In case you didn’t guess Z-Man has gotten a total of one kick in throughout the match here. He gets some jobber offense in the form of dropkicks until a Lariat ends him.

Rating: N/A. Just to show that Hansen is awesome and giving him a reason to be in the building. Keep that in mind.

We recap Luger vs. Flair at Wrestlewar 90 where Luger STILL couldn’t get the title off of him. He’s been US Champion for over a year now so everyone is just waiting on him to lose it. Luger is second only to Sting in popularity but Flair is his Kryptonite. Luger says he’s not used to being the champion vs. Flair which is true as I don’t think Flair has ever challenged him for anything before.

US Title: Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger

I love that black and white Flair robe. It has to be his best one, including the blue one. Since we’re in North Carolina, Flair is more or less the second coming. There’s no feeling out period here since both of them have fought about a million times. Speaking of a million times, Flair broke his back in a plane crash 20 years ago. Flair chops Luger and Luger Hulks Up.

Luger’s offense is limited at best but the fans freaking love him so it’s easy to see why he was pushed the way he was. Flair’s shoulder might be hurt. To the shock of no one that pays attention he’s faking and a cheap shot gives him the advantage. Ross messes up when he talks about Flair’s past, saying he played football and weighed 265lbs, 25lbs lighter than he is now, putting Luger at 290 here.

Basically Flair wants this to get his shot at Sting again. And there goes the knee as Flair gets a solid shot in on it. Flair chops away in the corner then kicks Luger in the knee and repeats the sequence a few times. Nice. Luger comes back again and we get a Flair Flop, but as he goes down Flair pokes him in the eye. That is what you call thinking while wrestling. We hit the fifteen minute mark (more like 10) and Luger gets two on a backslide. We already had one fall off of that move this century so there was no way that was happening.

Flair goes flying off the top as the crowd is way into this. We get the corner flip and clothesline on the apron as Flair is reeling. Another gorilla press and powerslam set up the Rack. It’s a bearhug first which makes sense for once here. Second rope suplex gets two as Flair gets his foot on the ropes. You can hear the crowd groan as they thought it was over. Flair hits a cross body to send them both to the floor. Luger gets back in and gets MAULED by Stan Hansen. This set up their match at Halloween Havoc where Hansen ended the longest US Title reign ever. Luger would get it back about 7 weeks later and hot it seven more months, giving him the title for two years minus 50 days. That’s not bad.

Rating: B. Rather good match here as these two just have insanely good chemistry together. Other than Sting Flair brought out the best in Luger and this was no exception. It’s a natural face vs. a natural heel which is the easiest formula in the world to work and these two did it as well as anyone. Luger chased Flair for years and I don’t think ever beat him for a title.

The Black Scorpion wants Sting. If Sting wins he’ll tell Sting who he is. Sting says he’s ready.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Black Scorpion

Scorpion has to be very careful here because he can’t let any of his trademark moves come out here so as to preserve his identity. Sting is so popular it’s unreal. This is actually the NWA and WCW Titles at once but they’re the same thing so it doesn’t really matter. Scorpion is in a hood and a mask so he’s doubling up here. Scorpion beats up Sting to start here but something tells me that’s not going to last long.

The announcers try to figure out who is under the mask as it’s been established that Scorpion is someone from Sting’s past. We hit the floor and it’s more or less even. Back in the ring and Sting takes over. He goes for the mask but the Scorpion gets out. There’s a section of about 20 empty chairs about seven to nine rows deep. Those would be excellent seats as they’re about eye level with the ring. I don’t remember them being empty earlier so they must have left or something.

They brawl on the ramp for a bit and Sting takes over. Top rope cross body gets two and Scorpion keeps the advantage. We take a shot at WWF by saying anyone can have a belt made and say they’re a champion but only this title dates back to 1905. That’s nonsense but since when has truth meant anything in wrestling? In something I hardly ever remember, Sting gets the pin off the Splash and not the Deathlock.

Rating: D+. Pretty much a standard match here which obviously was to further the angle which was blown off as Starrcade where the Scorpion was revealed to be of course Ric Flair. This Scorpion was a former midcarder named Al Perez whose name shouldn’t really mean anything to you. The match was more or less just a power vs. power match and I don’t think anyone believed Sting was in anything resembling danger.

Post match Sting goes for the mask and gets it off, revealing a red mask underneath. He goes for that one but ANOTHER Black Scorpion shows up on the ramp. Instead of, oh I don’t know, RUNNING EIGHT FEET TO GET AT THE BLACK SCORPION, Sting stares at him and lets him walk away.

Sting says he’s confused to end the show.

On a semi-related note, the Black Scorpion standing on the ramp and staring down Sting is my very first memory of wrestling ever.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty weak show but the Luger vs. Flair match is good and the main event has the most popular guy in the world not named Hulk Hogan so it revived the crowd. The problem is this is a two hour show and about an hour of it is just painfully boring. WCW was in a weird spot here as there wasn’t really much of anything for Sting to do and with Flair leaving in about 9 months things would just get worse. It would take a combination of Rick Rude and Paul E. Dangerously (Heyman) to breathe life into the company in about 13 months. This wasn’t much at all but the last half hour was ok. Not worth seeing though.

 

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Wrestle War 1990 – Another Great Flair vs. Luger Match

Wrestlewar 1990
Date: February 25, 1990
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 9,894
Commentators: Jim Ross, Terry Funk

We’re into 1990 now and Funk has stepped into commentary, so we need a new feud for Flair. That man would have been Sting who had been thrown out of the Horsemen on February 6. At Starrcade, Sting had pinned Flair to win the Iron Man Tournament and asked for a title shot. Flair snapped and turned the Horsemen heel again, destroying Sting in the process. That night, Sting legit hut his knee so his title match tonight (which he was supposed to win) was postponed. The replacement? Lex Luger, who has had more classics with Flair than should be legally allowed. Let’s get to it.

This show is called Wild Thing. The NWA had a habit of adding random titles to shows which have nothing to do with them for the most part.

Dan Spivey is hurt and may be out tonight.

JR and Terry run down the card.

Teddy Long says Spivey is indeed hurt and there will be a replacement for him tonight. There’s another surprise later as well.

Kevin Sullivan/Buzz Sawyer vs. Dynamic Dudes

Sawyer is insane and that’s about all you need to know about him. He starts with Ace and these people are a bit more receptive than the Philly crowd was in our last show. Speaking of last shows, this is the final major show that Sawyer was on for WCW if that means anything for you. Ace sends him to the floor and a brawl breaks out on the outside. Shane and Sullivan come in and the Dudes keep control with the arm work.

Ace comes in to work on the arm more but Sullivan gets a tag. He also gets in a fight with Sawyer, much to the Dudes’ amusement. That’s smart: why break up a fight when you can get a breather? Sawyer’s arm goes into the post so Shane cranks on it. Out to the floor with Sawyer taking over. Sunset flip gets two for Ace and there’s the tag to Shane. Buzz immediately takes him down and hooks a bearhug to take Shane to the mat.

Sullivan comes in and pops Ace, which draws him in so that Sullivan can throw Shane to the floor. Everything breaks down and Johnny botches a flying headscissors. Sawyer goes up and hits a big old flying splash for the pin. That’s the interim Raw GM and the Executive Vice President of Talent Relations for you. Funk called it the Jam Sandwich, which is something Brodus should use.

Rating: C-. Not much here as none of these guys was much to watch at this point. I’ve never been a big fan of Shane and Ace is just ok. He never was all that good as his size became an issue for him but he was too slim to be a power guy. Not a very good match with a total contrast in styles that didn’t work at all.

Norman the Lunatic, who is a goofy character that isn’t all there upstairs, hits on Missy Hyatt.

Cactus Jack Manson vs. Norman the Lunatic

Yes it’s Mick Foley and no he doesn’t mean a thing yet. He’s pretty much just thrown onto the card here, much like Cuban Assassin was last time. Jack jumps him to start but gets thrown to the floor with ease. JR: “This will not be a battle of wits. It may be a battle of nitwits.” Also Jack’s favorite color is light black and wants to be the foreman of the Double Cross Ranch.

Jack rams Norman’s head into the buckle and Norman says do it again. A quick bearhug goes on Jack but he’s soon whipped over the corner and out to the floor in a big crash. Headbutt knocks Jack off the apron but misses a charge into the post. Back in and Cactus rips at his face. Cactus pounds him down and it’s off to a chinlock. The electric chair drop puts Jack down but a splash misses. Jack tries a sunset flip but Norman drops onto him for the pin.

Rating: D. Yeah it was bad but Foley of course would get a lot more going for him. Norman is more famous as Bastian Booger and a lot of other bad characters in WWF. Jack was clearly going to be a guy that bumped like mad, but at the end of the day what sets him apart is that he made people care about him as opposed to guys like say New Jack.

Jim Cornette talks about how things change but some things stay the same. Tonight the Midnights have the Rock N Roll Express, which is something that never changes.

Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

This is another one of those matches where the starting rating rises up from a C to a B. These guys feuded for probably 6 years on and off and had more classics than you could shake a stick at. Why you would want to shake a stick at it is beyond me but you get the idea. Gibson vs. Stan gets us going. Lane dives to the mat and they counter each other a lot. Gibson counters a counter and drops a fist onto Lane’s head to take over.

Cornette gets in an argument with Nick Patrick and wants to box him. This is an old spot they did which always gets a big reaction. Cornette is dispatched quickly and it’s Morton vs. Lane now. The fans are into this too. Bobby gets knocked to the floor and Lane shoves him down as well. We never got a big singles match between those two and I think that’s for the best.

Lane vs. Bobby now and they speed things up. Nothing seems to be coming out of the shove from a few moments ago. Off to a test of strength and Morton is losing. He climbs up Bobby, stands on his shoulders, and jumps onto Lane in the corner. Gibson runs off Lane and the Midnights are knocked to the floor. Cornette tries to get in and falls over the top rope so Gibson knocks back down. Both Midnights are double clotheslined to the floor as well and it’s been one sided for about the first eight minutes.

Back in now and it’s Gibson vs. Lane but Lane still can’t get anything going. Morton comes in for a double elbow but gets sent outside. Never mind again as Lane goes into the post. Now it’s Eaton again and it’s a slugout. Terry gets into this and they both tumble to the floor. Outside Lane slams Morton and the Midnights take over.

Now we get into a much more traditional tag match which was popularized if not perfected by these teams, making this a fun match. Morton is sent to the floor and rammed into various metal objects. He manages a sunset flip but Cornette grabs the referee. Morton tries an O’Connor Roll but Lane makes a blind tag and hooks a neckbreaker for two. Eaton goes after the arm with a single arm DDT and into a hammerlock.

Lane comes in for a quick reverse chinlock before bringing in Eaton for a top rope elbow. Back to the arm by Lane. Man the Midnights tag in fast. Eaton works on the arm again with the hammerlock and the Midnights set for the Rocket Launcher. It hits the knees though and here’s Gibson. Everything breaks down but he’s still 2-1. The Midnights load up the Flapjack but Gibson rolls through for the pin on Lane.

Rating: B+. Oh come on it’s the Midnights vs. Rock N Roll. There’s practically no way that this can be screwed up. It’s a great speed match and they know each other so well that they’re going to have a good match through familiarity if nothing else. Fun stuff here but somehow not their best work together.

The Road Warriors have Sting armbands on and are ready for the Chicago street fight up next.

Skyscrapers vs. Road Warriors

Street fight. The Skyscrapers are almost a revolving door of members and in this case it’s Mark Callous and a masked man who is played by Mike Enos. The Skyscrapers have Teddy Long to counter Paul Ellering. Long comes in to fight Ellering and is knocked to the floor with one punch. Everyone is in street clothes. What street these would be normal on I have no idea but the thought is there.

The Warriors dominate to start and here comes Doom for no apparent reason. They’re in suits and Teddy goes to join them. Enos gets in some offense to take over (he’s just the masked man here but I’ll be calling him Enos to keep things clearer) but it’s pretty short lived. The Road Warriors shrug it off and Hawk hits a running clothesline off the apron to Callous. They get back in and this slows down even more. The Warriors throw Callous out and the Doomsday Device kills Enos easily for the pin.

Rating: D. I love the Road Warriors but they need the right kind of team to make things work. The Skyscrapers were never quite a team that worked, at least not here. They were good at destroying jobbers and small people but having brawls like this was never really anything worth seeing.

Doom comes in post match and brawls with the Warriors in a much more entertaining fight. This feud never really happened as the Warriors jumped to the WWF in June.

US Tag Titles: Freebirds vs. Brian Pillman/Z-Man

The Birds are challenging here. They get sent to the floor immediately and the champs steal their clothes and dance around as Badstreet plays in the background. Funny moment. The crowd is all over the Birds. They weren’t much in the ring but they were heat machines. Today is Flair’s birthday according to JR. We finally get going with Brian vs. Hayes. Brian knocks him around with a clothesline and Garvin fluffs his hair.

Speaking of Garvin here he is and he gets Z-Man. Z takes him down with a headlock but misses a dropkick. Garvin, ever the Rhodes Scholar, ducks his head and gets kicked in the face. Back to Brian for another headlock. Hayes comes back in and things are going slowly to start, implying that they have a lot of time to work with. Sunset flip with a great jump gets two for Pillman.

Z-Man works on the arm and goes into a Fujiwar Armbar to Hayes. Back to Garvin who loses any advantage that Hayes had gotten on Z-Man. Pillman comes in as the fans seem a bit distracted. Hayes comes in and hooks a sleeper (sleep hold according to Ross) as JR talks about Paul Boesch, the promoter of Houston Wrestling for decades, demonstrating this hold in the second World War.

Brian escapes and sends him into the corner but charges into a great left hand to put him down. Brian rolls through a cross body for two. Back to Garvin as this is going a lot longer than I was expecting it to go. Since Garvin can’t manage to keep Brian in one place he makes the tag to Z-Man. Z-Man puts the Z Lock (sleeper) on Hayes but Garvin comes off the top for the save.

Garvin hooks a chinlock as this match has gone well over fifteen minutes so far. Now they mix things up with a Hayes chinlock. After 18 minutes, we’re told this is a rematch from the finals of the tournament where Z-Man and Pillman won the titles in the first place. Z-Man gets a small package for two. Hayes is like enough of that and goes back to the chinlock. JR thinks Hayes looks like Alice Cooper. Terry wants to know if Hayes knows who Buffalo Bill is.

Hayes goes up and kind of steps off with no significant contact being made. Back to Garvin as this needs to end really soon. Who decided to give the Birds over twenty minutes? Top rope fist gets two for Hayes after a non-tag. Bulldog gets two as Pillman breaks it up. Back to the chinlock #4 but Zenk drops him with a DDT of his own. There’s the tag to Pillman and the fans care more than I expected them to. Pillman cleans house but Hayes brings in a title but Pillman comes off the top with a cross body as the title is being taken out to retain the titles.

Rating: D. Technically the match was fine but MY GOODNESS this ran long. It clocks in at almost twenty four minutes which is just far too long. Pillman and Zenk can easily go that long but the Birds were already through their whole set of stuff at about 10 minutes in. The solution of course? Go 14 minutes past that. WAY too long and if you cut this to like 12 minutes it’s probably an okish match.

The Birds DDT both champs post match.

The Steiners are all fired up and dedicate their match to Sting. Rick calls himself a big bad bully beater upper.

Tag Titles: Ole Anderson/Arn Anderson vs. Steiner Brothers

This was supposed to be Tully/Arn but he failed a drug test and was pretty much finished in mainstream wrestling so they brought out Ole in the finals part of his in ring career to fill in for him. Scott starts with Arn and the ring is quickly cleared by pure power. The Steiners are champions if that’s unclear. The Andersons try to double team and that fails as well. Rick and Scott go after the knee of Ole so Ole bails and almost says some very bad words.

Rick vs. Ole now and it turns into another brawl very quickly with the champs clearing the ring again. Rick hooks on a headlock to Arn and JR talks about Rick wanting to be an elementary school science teacher. Terry wants to know why he isn’t anyone’s favorite wrestler. Arn gets in a knee and goes up but has Rick waiting on him. For once a Horseman thinks better of it and climbs down.

Arn bails to the floor and both Steiners are in again. That’s been a habit of theirs tonight. Back to Ole with a headlock on Scott which goes nowhere. Arn comes in again and takes an atomic drop, allowing him to do his great selling of it. Figure Four is broken up by Ole who then comes in legally. For some reason Ole tries amateur stuff on Scott who easily suplexes him and tags in Rick.

The Anderson get an advantage for what must have been a good three seconds but Rick suplexes Arn to stop it cold. Ole tries to hit Rick in the head and that goes about as well as anything else has. The Andersons are brothers at this point for those of you that try to keep track of how they’re related. They go after Rick’s arm which is their trademark. Ole tries to hit Rick in the head which is enough for Rick to make the tag back to Scott.

Scott and Arm go outside and Scott accidentally clotheslines the post. You know Arn is going to go after that like Elvis on a pound of bacon. Ole comes back in and the arm work continues. For some reason the Andersons keep switching off from the arm to general attacks which never work. A Vader Bomb gets knees and there’s a Frankensteiner and a hot tag to Rick. In a fast ending, Rick punches them both down and a fast small package pins Ole.

Rating: C-. It’s not bad but again this was long and not that great. The Andersons were a lot stupider than you would expect from them here which is very Un-Horsemenlike. It’s much better than the previous one but it’s still long and boring. It was too slow and these guys didn’t click at all for the most part.

The Andersons get in a double team move on the arm of Scott post match to injure it.

Lex says he’s nervous but he’s going to Rack Flair tonight and win the title.

Flair says that he’s great and has Woman says that Lex needs to get his engine started, whatever that means.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger

Sting is with Lex while Woman is with Flair. The idea here is that Sting was supposed to get the title shot here but legit injured his knee which makes this out to be a “tragedy” according to the introductions. This is the main event and we have 45 minutes to go during Flair’s entrance. Chain wrestling to start with no one having an advantage. Flair shoves the referee and is shoved right back.

Flair agrees to a test of strength and down goes Naitch. Flair bails to the floor and says Wooo a lot. Lex knocks him to the floor again so Ric takes the walk. Luger chases him down and the beating continues. Lex is US Champion here. A gorilla press by Luger puts Flair down so Flair tries the chops. Those do about as well as they do against Sting and Lex is all fired up.

There’s a bear hug which Luger bends forward for a two count. Luger hits ten punches in the corner but Flair ducks a clothesline and Luger falls to the floor. Flair chops away outside and back in they go. Scratch that as Flair dumps him again and calls for Woman to get on the apron. With the referee distracted Flair sends him into the barricade and chops him down. Flair punches him back down to the floor as I guess he’s looking for the countout.

Back in for more than ten seconds this time and Flair drops a knee on the head. Another knee drop hits for two. Lex pops up for his comeback but misses a corner charge and is right back down again. This is one of those matches that’s hard to make fun of because they both know what they’re doing and have such great chemistry together that there’s not much they can’t do together.

Flair hooks a hammerlock and stomps on the arm. Lex starts coming back again so Flair pokes him in the eyes, which Funk calls the Achilles Tendon of big men. Luger gets caught in another hammerlock and when he tries to punch his way out of it, the referee stops the fist, allowing Flair to poke him in the eye again. Ric works on the arm even more but Lex grabs the throat to break it up. He throws Flair into the corner for the Flair Flip and we go to the floor.

Flair chops Lex again and Luger is all fired up. Back in and Flair is caught in a sleeper which puts him down. The champ gets his foot on the ropes and manages a belly to back to escape. Luger suplexes him right back and goes after the knee. He wraps it around the post and tries a figure four. Even JR basically says it’s awful as he spins the wrong way, making him look like he’s a nine year old imitating it.

Ric fights up and chops some more but walks into a powerslam for two. The pop on the kickout was big as the fans thought it was over. Flair still can’t get that the chops don’t work and Lex is all fired up. After a quick exchange outside, Luger backslides him for two. Luger punches him in the corner but Flair atomic drops him, hurting Lex’s knee in the process. Where are these knee injuries in matches against people not named Flair?

A pair of top rope axhandles gets two for Flair. Butterfly suplex gets two. Here’s a sleeper by Flair as he hasn’t gone after the knee much yet. That gets broken after awhile and NOW it’s knee time. We’re probably half an hour into this. Flair works on the knee in his usual manner as Sting comes back to ringside. Sting cheers Luger on enough for him to reverse the hold and it’s broken up.

He slaps Lex to fire him up and Flair bails fast. Out to the floor and Lex no sells a whip into the barricade. There’s a gorilla press and Flair goes up, only to get slammed down. Luger clotheslines him to the floor then suplexes him back in for two. There’s the powerslam which Luger earlier said would set up the Rack. Woman distracts Luger, allowing Flair to knee Lex in the back, crushing the referee in the process.

Lex clotheslines Flair down but there’s no referee. A superplex kills Flair dead again but the Andersons run in because there’s no referee. There’s the Torture Rack and the referee is back up, but the Andersons go after Sting. Luger drops the hold when Flair is about to give up, going to save his friend. The Horsemen keep him out there long enough for the count out and a HUGE boo from the crowd. Sting’s day was coming soon though.

Rating: A. See, THIS is how you book a screwjob finish. It made perfect sense for Lex to go out there, meaning that for once he wasn’t an idiot. They had the crowd into this and when you can do that during a forty minute match, that’s usually a great sign. It was an excellent match and the ending is about as perfect as it could have been. Luger would get a rematch the next month in a cage and then it was Sting’s turn.

The Steiners come out for the save. Good thing they couldn’t be out 40 seconds earlier to let Lex get the title isn’t it?

Overall Rating: B-. Still not a classic but it was a better show than Halloween Havoc for sure. The two later tag matches weren’t anything of note and you can always find a good Express vs. Express match. Still though, this was a good show overall and there really isn’t anything all that terrible on it. I’d highly recommend the clipped version or one with a fast forward button at the ready.

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #11: Sting Is Almost There

Clash of the Champions 11: Coastal Crush
Date: June 13, 1990
Location: McAlister Field House, Charleston, South, Carolina
Attendance: 4,100
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bob Caudle

This is right before the Great American Bash which is where Sting grabbed thr brass ring and got his first world title. The main event is Junkyard Dog vs. Flair and I have no idea why. Anyway, this is mainly a nothing show, but we also get some Steiners vs. Doom awesomeness so I can’t complain there. Let’s get to it.

The Southern Boys say they’re ready for the Freebirds.

The Birds respond by singing their own theme music.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

This is the Southern Boys’ (Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers) national debut. The Birds jump them which doesn’t work out all that well for them. Smothers and Garvin officially start us off. Smothers gets beaten down in the corner but breaks through and draws the Birds in for Steve to hit a top rope cross body to take them both out. Things settle down a bit and Garvin takes over on Armstrong.

Back to Hayes who works over the arm. This is a pretty basic match so far but nothing has been all that bad. Elbow gets two for Hayes and it’s back to the arm. The arena they’re in is on the campus on the Citadel whose coach won some award the day of this show so it’s nice timing. In other words, there’s not much to talk about here so I’m repeating what JR says. Armstrong finally breaks through to make a tag to Smothers and he cleans house. Everything breaks down and Garvin covers Smothers but Steve comes off the top with a flying headbutt and puts Tracy on top for the big upset.

Rating: C+. Great example here of what you do to start a show. They had a fast paced match with a hot ending and that’s all you need to do to start a show. I enjoyed it, even though there wasn’t much to it. That being said, at times that’s all you need to do and it was a very fine opener.

Tommy Rich vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow looks strange sleeveless. Rich hammers away to start but runs into the size and power game. Tommy, who used to be world champion while Bigelow never war, works on the arm and gets a rollup for one. Bam Bam just goes off, tossing Rich all over the place and then choking past five for the DQ. Bigelow wasn’t in WCW long if I remember right.

Rating: D-. This was pretty much nothing but a way for Bigelow to look dominant. I don’t remember him in 1990 at all and I know he wasn’t on most of the PPVs later in the year at all. I’ve checked and this and Capital Combat were the only two major shows he was on all year. It was an NWA/Japan thing so he went to Japan for good for a few years until he went back to the WWF in late 92.

A man is coming. His name is Vader. He’ll debut at the Bash.

This guy will be as well: El Gigante. He has an interview with Gary Michael Capetta of all people. It’s in Spanish because Gigante can’t speak much English. I speak enough Spanish to understand it but thankfully they translate it.

Samoan Swat Team vs. Mike Rotunda/Z-Man

Rotunda is Captain Mike here which is post Varsity Club for him. The Swat Team is Fatu and Samoan Savage, who is better known as Tama from the Islanders. Rotunda vs. Fatu gets us going and the Samoan is knocked to the floor. Off to Z-Man who dropkicks Fatu to the floor again. Back to Rotundo who gets a cross body for two. The Samoans cheat to take over. Oddly enough they don’t have a manager which is rare for the wild savages.

Rotunda gets caught and beaten down. By the way, changing the last letter of his name is intentional. You’ll hear it as either depending on what year it is. Nerve hold goes on and Bob Caudle says it’s like hitting a mule in the head with a 2×4. Can someone call PETA? Rotundo gets beaten down on the floor but comes back with a double clothesline to take over. Z-Man comes in and misses most of the kicks that are sold anyway. Savage hits a Vader Bomb but the faces switch (WHAT?) and Rotunda steals a small package win.

Rating: D+. I’m in awe over that ending. One: Rotunda has shorter hair. Two: He’s in black, Z-Man was in white. Three: They don’t look alike. Four: FATU LOOKED STRAIGHT AT HIM FOR THREE SECONDS. The match was ok other than that though, and it was fine for the spot it had on here which was just a five and a half minute filler.

Video on Mean Mark.

Mean Mark vs. Brian Pillman

For those of you unfamiliar with Mark, I’ll save his reveal to the end of the match. Mark has Dangerously with him and jumps Pillman to start. He’s a big monster and that’s about the extent of his character. Oh and he’s mean. Pillman tries to use speed but Mark just kicks him down like he’s nothing. Crucifix doesn’t work at all and Mark stomps away. Off to a chinlock and Mark is so new he can’t even do that right. An elbow in the corner misses but Brian can’t get anything going. Mark knocks him to the apron but he skins the cat and hits a missile dropkick. And then they botch the ending off an Irish whip so Mark hot shots him for the pin.

Rating: D. Boring match here but it set up Mark for his US Title shot at the Bash. His finisher was the Heart Punch which is exactly what it sounds like. Mark would only appear like 5 times in the NWA before his final appearance at the Bash. He would be in the WWF in November as an unhurtable monster called Kane. That was just his first name. His occupation was an undertaker. He soon dropped the first name and just went by his job title.

US Tag Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

The Midnights have the belts. That Midnight song is just AWESOME. Eaton vs. Gibson to get us started. These two teams probably wrestled about a thousand times so they’ll have a decent match just by muscle memory. The problem here is that they’re getting old which makes that a little bit harder. They spend a few minutes working on getting to a lockup. Off to Lane who does a little better with his kicks.

Gibson kicks him in the head to knock him back down. Off to Morton and my goodness the hair gel bills in this match could bankrupt a small country. These two are called the cream of the crop by JR and I can’t say I agree. They’re moving fast here but somehow it’s still in first gear. Nothing here is anything interesting at all. Morton finally gets a rana to speed things up but the Midnights have a meeting instead of keeping things going.

Off to Eaton but Morton escapes the corner again and grabs the arm again. The Midnights can’t get anything going here. Morton tries another armdrag but Bobby punches him down to finally give the Midnights the advantage. Morton counters a superplex in mid-air but Lane breaks up a rollup. Everything breaks down and the challengers hit stereo rollups for stereo twos.

Things slow down again and Eaton hits a suplex to Morton before bringing Lane back in. Off to Eaton quickly but he misses a charge in the corner and Gibson comes in for probably the last tag of the match for his team. Morton and Eaton go to the floor as Gibson goes after the legs. Off to a sleeper instead but Bobby breaks it up which gets two for Eaton. Everything breaks down again and the double dropkick takes Eaton down. Lane breaks the cover up….and that’s a DQ. Seriously?

Rating: C. This was one of the weakest Express Collisions I’ve seen in a very long time. Granted it probably had a lot to do with them getting later into their mainstream careers. Not much to see here but the Midnights would lose the titles soon and they would be retired before too long, which was probably the right idea.

Doug Furnas vs. Barry Windham

Furnas is billed as the World’s Strongest Man. Windham is a Horseman. Furnas runs Barry down and JR is talking about football. Sunset flip gets two for Doug and Barry bails. Furnas kind of botches a backflip off the top and doesn’t quite get Barry up for a gorilla press. Clothesline gets two. Barry gets his knee up and takes Doug’s head off with a clothesline. JR can’t stop praising Furnas to get on to the match. Powerslam gets two for Furnas. They hit the ropes for a bit and Barry grabs a belly to back and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Decent power match here but nothing too great. Furnas went to Japan soon after this so he didn’t mean all that much. Windham was a Horseman for a few more years but mainly did tag team stuff. He has a really forgettable career around this time actually. Not much here but it was ok.

Sid (after being told to go by the director) says he’ll take out Luger.

Lex Luger vs. Sid Vicious

Sid jumps him to start and but Lex hits a clothesline and pins him in like 20 seconds.

World Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Doom

The Steiners had been unstoppable but Doom had shocked the world and won the titles at a PPV called Capital Combat. Doom has the old Ron Simmons’ music which is still awesome. The masks are gone too. Ron vs. Scott gets us going. Scott busts out something I’ve never seen before: a floatover fallaway slam. It isn’t really falling away either as he doesn’t let go. Both Doomers take one and the ring is cleared.

A Steiner Line to the back of the head puts Simmons down and it’s off to Reed. Scott throws him around too. I can easily see why they were thinking he was the heir apparent to the world title here. You know, except for the whole Sting guy. Rick comes in now but Nick Patrick gets in the way and Ron gets in a right hand. Rick is like cool man and hits a belly to belly to send Ron flying.

Now it’s Rick’s turn to beat up Doom on his own. Reed FINALLY goes to the eyes to take over. They go back to the Doom corner and Rick fights back out of it with ease. On the floor Doom gets it together and takes Rick down via a clothesline. Simmons beats on Rick back inside and you can really tell that Doom isn’t that experienced yet. While Scott is with the referee Rick gets tossed to the floor. Reed comes in and drops a middle rope elbow for two.

Reed misses a running knee into the corner and Rick hits a double axe off the middle rope. Back to Scott and things speed way up again. Everything breaks down and Teddy throws in a foreign object. Scott takes Simmons down with a superplex but Reed clocks him with the object. Rick covers Simmons at the same time and it’s a double pin, but Scott was legal so Doom wins it.

Rating: C. These two could have good matches every time they went out there and this worked well enough. Doom would hold the titles longer than any team in the history of WCW, now losing them until February of the next year to the Freebirds who lost them to the Steiners before they won them from Doom. And yes that’s accurate.

JYD says he’ll win.

Paul Orndorff says he’ll beat Anderson.

Paul Orndorff vs. Arn Anderson

I don’t remember Orndorff around this time at all. He’s a face and Anderson is by definition a Horseman. Anderson is TV Champion but this is non-title. Slow start with Paul working on a headlock. Make that a sleeper. Now it’s a figure four. You know that’s going to get a pop in the south. After the leg is slammed into the post, Anderson hooks the spinebuster to break the momentum.

Orndorff gets a sunset flip and pulls the trunks down which thankfully is on a different camera side. Off to an abdominal stretch. Arn finally gets caught grabbing the ropes and we go to a chinlock instead. Orndorff comes back with punches and things speed up a bit. It’s still not all that interesting though. Anderson gets the knees up but Orndorff reverses a small package for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a dull match here but I’ve never liked Orndoff’s stuff at all. Well his stuff with Hogan was good but his WCW stuff always bored me. I think it’s more that he had one incredible feud and that was about it for him. Boring match and Orndorff never got the title I don’t think.

The Horsemen say that they’ll win the main event tonight and Flair will keep the title. This was pretty rambling though.

NWA World Title: Junkyard Dog vs. Ric Flair

JYD gets a full jazz band intro. He takes Flair down with a right hand and is trying to keep this basic, which is probably smart for someone of his intellect. There the on all fours headbutt. A punch puts Flair on the ramp and we get a Flair Flop. Back in a few chops are no sold. A punch in the corner gets the same result. Now a knee drop is no sold. Ok we get it: he has a hard head.

Now they stand around for awhile because that’s been done a few times already in this match, so let’s do it again. Dog punches him again and there’s Flair Flop #2. Ole distracts the referee so Flair hits JYD in the head with a chair. Guess how much it’s sold. The answer would be NONE. Flair jumps into a punch and this is really quite bad. Flair hits a knee to the back…and then gets slammed off the top. He pounds away and the Horsemen run in for the DQ.

Rating: F+. This was just bad. I have no idea what the point in making JYD look so strong was but it didn’t really work at all. Flair didn’t get anything more than a few chops here and there and it made him look awful. This didn’t work at all and the champ looked like a joke. He would lose the title in a few weeks, but man at least make him look strong beforehand.

Sting and his boys clear the ring and Sting stalks Flair to the back.

After a break, Rocky King yells about the Horsemen. Thankfully someone intelligent sounding (Sting) talks quickly and says he wants Flair. Their title match hadn’t been announced yet. He suggests the Bash for the shot and says he’ll beg if he has to. The Horsemen come back and it winds up being Sting vs. Flair in the ring as everyone else is held back. Sting pounds on Flair as the credits roll.

Overall Rating: C-. Not the best show ever but I’ve seen a lot worse. The problem is that the wrestling is ok, but it’s not really interesting. You had a bunch of matches on here that ran about five minutes and that really isn’t enough to get some interest going for things. This didn’t really set up the Bash. Almost all of these people were on the PPV but their matches weren’t announced here. Not much to see but it’s nothing horrible.

 

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Clash of the Champions Count-Up – #10: Sting’s Done Hurt His Leg

Clash of the Champions 10: Texas Shootout
Date: February 6, 1990
Location: Memorial Coliseum, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jim Cornette

We’re getting ready for the WrestleWar PPV and there’s one moment on this show that totally altered that PPV as well as arguably the next three and a half years of WCW as well as a legend’s career but we’ll get to that later. Also on this show….uh…..oh you get to see Foley at 24 years old against Mil Mascaras in a match he talks about in his book. Oh and Undertaker is on this show about 8 months before he became Undertaker. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks like a bad arcade game where you have what appear to be cardboard cutouts of wrestlers being shot in windows of a saloon. It’s going to be one of those shows isn’t it? Cornette gets two talk for two and a half hours so he couldn’t be happier.

Terry Funk has a live mic in Texas to do interviews at ringside. This cannot be good under any circumstances.

Gordon Solie is doing backstage interviews and has the Road Warriors here, about four months before they bailed to WWF. They don’t like the Skyscrapers.

Oliver Humperdink does the intro for Samoan Savage (Tama from the Islanders). He comes out to something like the Halloween theme. These interviews are very, and I mean EXACTLY like ones you would see on a SNME.

Steve Williams puts a dummy in an ambulance and says to the hospital while Bad to the Bone plays in the background. This is going to be a LONG night isn’t it?

Samoan Savage vs. Steve Williams

Oliver Humperdink is listed as the Big Kahuna here. Are you serious? Williams goes right at him in the corner and the brawl is on. The Samoan runs away which is probably the right thing for him to do at this point. Williams fires off right hands and slams that fat man. How did he used to be pretty slim just a few years prior to this? He finally drills a clothesline to take Williams down and get a breath of air.

Humperdink does some weak choking as Williams has been sent to the floor. There’s a house band for no apparent reason called the Tough Guys. Woman is here for no apparent reason again. That sounds like a running theme for tonight. Nitron, Woman’s usual muscle, isn’t here tonight for some reason that the announcers don’t know either.

Time for the chinlock to go on because we have to do that. Cornette makes Mexican jokes as he has been known to do once or twice a minute. Williams fights up with no real trouble but walks into a powerslam for two. That’s almost too interesting though so it’s back to the nerve hold. Sunset flip doesn’t work for Dr. Death but hitting him in the head doesn’t work for Savage. Back to the chinlock as Cornette thinks there should be a Samoan contingent to balance things out.

Williams is sent to the floor and Humperdink gets in a shot which stuns him a bit. So let me get this straight. A right from Humperdink can sent Williams reeling a bit but at the same time a straight downward shot by the Samoan has no effect? Why is Humperdink the manager again? Anyway a top rope splash misses for the Savage so Williams walks around with him in a slam for awhile. Williams gets a backslide of all things and we’re done.

Rating: C-. For a battle of power men there it was just ok. This would be Williams’ last match actually as he was supposed to beat Luger for the US Title at WrestleWar but something happened to change that and he left for Japan as a result. Not much of a match but it’s an opener with Tama as a competitor. What were you expecting?

The Tough Guys play for a bit for no apparent reason.

Terry Funk is here to talk to the Horsemen (faces at this point) who he says will be hard to stop in 1990. In this case it’s Flair (world champion, shocking I know), Arn, Ole and Sting. Yes that Sting. Ole gets in Funk’s face for talking too much. Well no one ever accused Ole of being all that smart. Flair says they’re going to make a statement through their spokesman Ole.

Ole, the great spokesman, has his back to the camera. This is about Sting apparently, because he’s fired. Ole and Arn have been brought back by Flair to get rid of Sting, who is in trouble for wanting the world title. Sting wasn’t taken out yet because Sting saved Flair. Ole offers him a chance to live if he turns down the title shot and has two hours to do that. Sting says not a chance so Ole says the same thing. Sting finally gets a chance to say something but it’s a classic Horsemen beatdown. This isn’t the big moment that I was referring to.

Mod Squad vs. Brian Pillman/Tom Zenk

The Mod Squad is a weak heel tag team made of Basher and Spike. Pillman and Spike (I think) start us off. He’s the skinnier one if nothing else. Pillman can throw a great dropkick. Off to Zenk and the arm work begins. Basher comes in and that goes about as well. Cornette and Ross really don’t seem all that interested in this match and I can’t say I blame them.

Brian beats on Basher for awhile and Zenk adds an enziguri for two. Double teaming doesn’t work on Zenk as Pillman gets a double slingshot clothesline to take both Mods down. Apparently the Midnight Express want to reelect Marian Berry. Ok then. Spike gets a face jam to Pillman to take over as Cornette makes jokes.

We talk about Sting and Flair some more because the match is rather boring. Double teaming by the Squad as Pillman doesn’t even have the Bengal tights here. Off to a chinlock and then another one by the other Mod dude. This match is taking far too long as there hasn’t been anything of note. Cornette disputes the idea that he loves the fans as Pillman gets an elbow to Basher but can’t tag out. Crucifix gets two for Brian but Spike misses a top rope elbow, hot tag Zenk, house is cleaned, cross body ends Basher.

Rating: D. How in the world was this a ten minute match? It should have been something like three but we had to fill in time I guess. Z-Man and Pillman would win the US Tag Titles less than a week after this so there was no way they were going to lose here. Just WAY too long for what they had going on here.

Cactus Jack Manson vs. Mil Mascaras

It’s Foley before he meant anything at all. Nice heat on his introduction though. Foley BLASTED Mascaras in his book over this match so let’s see how bad it is. Cornette says Mascaras is most popular in Japan for some reason. We get to a bow and arrow almost immediately as Mascaras makes Foley look like an idiot, which to be fair is fine because Foley is a far smaller deal at this point.

Test of strength goes to Mascaras and headscissors a go-go. Cactus gets sent to the floor and falls over a chair, landing on his back. JR: “A breakfast room at a honeymoon hotel isn’t as empty as Cactus Jack’s head.” Jack hammers away and Mascaras ignores it, hooking what can only be called a Liontamer for a bit.

Here’s a great example of the no selling complaints. As you know, one of Foley’s signature moves is the elbow off the apron. He hits a backbreaker on the floor and Mascaras never actually goes all the way to the ground. Foley sets for the elbow but there’s no Mascaras, as instead he’s snuck into the ring and dropkicks Foley to the floor where he bangs his head on the concrete. That was one of his signature moves for a long time, and people wonder why he can barely move. Anyway a top rope cross body ends this.

Rating: D. Match was weak, but I totally see Foley’s point with the no selling thing. I mean dude, shake your head a little bit after a punch at least. You’re in the midcard for a one off appearance. You’re not quite Hulk Hogan here. The backbreaker thing was pitiful too. Jack took awhile to set up the elbow which I’d guess was supposed to be the spot for the plunge, but at the same time you can’t even hit the ground? Foley isn’t the only one to complain about this, so it’s not just a personal grudge.

Missy Hyatt hypes that she’s the new co-host of the Main Event.

The Tough Guys perform and Cactus Jack beats them up. That’s a perk. He and the drummer, an AWA guy named JT Southern, get into it a bit and that went nowhere.

Norman the Lunatic, more famous as Bastian Booger, is a crazy man here. As in he was in a straightjacket most of the time. Here he wants hot dogs or something and is told it’s falls count anywhere against Kevin Sullivan.

Norman the Lunatic vs. Kevin Sullivan

Before the match we get a video of Norman at a zoo, petting pigs. In the arena he’s in a cowboy outfit and hands out valentines to the fans. This was one of those concept characters if you get the idea. Sullivan jumps him and we go to the floor almost immediately. Back at this point, companies could sponsor parts of the ring, meaning Sullivan is sent into the Roos’ post.

Norman does that seated splash of his for no cover. A middle rope splash misses though and we’re back to the floor again. Sullivan actually SLAMS Norman in an impressive and surprising spot. There goes Norman’s shirt which means we have to see something rather unpleasant. A “belly to back suplex” (looked like a Russian leg sweep) gets two. Cornette: “This Norman is so stupid that mind readers only charge him half price.”

Sullivan dominates him for a good while and there’s nothing of note. I guess they’re afraid of trying to let Sullivan work a regular match which I can’t blame them for. Back in for you guessed it, more brawling/pounding by Sullivan. Norman makes a comeback and knocks Sullivan through the ropes to the outside. Up the aisle they go and the ramps is huge. Backdrop gets two for Sullivan. Into the back and they go into the women’s restroom where sound effects are used sans video. Sullivan is knocked out of the room as Norman has a toilet seat in hand. Apparently the pin happened off camera. At least it’s over.

Rating: D. This was junk of course and the ending hurts it even worse. No word on why they were fighting but I’d assume it was some kind of bully thing as that has infected even the past. Better go found a charity to help fight it. How do those work anyway? Do you accept donations to pay bullies off? Norman would stick around for awhile and do nothing of note before he became a trucker for some reason.

Funk is here for his talk show segment known as Funk’s Grill with Luger as his guest. They like each other and Luger says Sting should turn down the shot because Luger would get the shot otherwise. The fans want Sting but Luger says you have the Total Package right now. This goes absolutely nowhere.

Road Warriors vs. Skyscrapers

Skyscrapers are Mean Mark (Undertaker) Callous and Dangerous Dan (Spivey) Spivey and have Teddy Long with them. Spivey beats on Hawk a bit but Hawk runs him over because he’s….uh Hawk I guess. Animal and Callous comes in. I’ll do what I can to not call him Taker but it’s not easy. He’s 6’9, has red hair and is 24 here. Animal no sells his offense but that’s typical for Animal.

Callous MOVES out there, missing a cross body of all things but it’s off to Spivey and Hawk again. Hawk charges but hits the post and the beating is on. We get what would become known as Old School to Hawk. It’s so weird to think that Taker and Foley were 8 years away from having one of the most brutal matches of all time. Taker counters a clothesline into a Fujiwara armbar which only lasts a few seconds.

Old School doesn’t work a second time and it’s off to Animal and Spivey. Everything breaks down and the Skyscrapers double team Animal for a bit until he backflips out of a double suplex. Hawk comes back in and it’s Doomsday Device for Spivey. Callous comes off the top with a chair and everything breaks down and it’s finally thrown out as Hawk takes a spike Piledriver. The Road Warriors get a big beatdown laid on them.

Rating: C-. For Taker being this young guy out there it’s very cool to see. Other than that it’s just a brawl which is ok but they’ve had it a few times already tonight which is a bit of an issue. Either way it’s not a terrible match but at the same time it got a bit annoying throughout. Eh it’s TV so I can’t complain that much.

Back from a break and they replay the Warriors getting beaten down.

Gordon Solie still can’t get an interview with Sting. He does have Brian Pillman though, who says Sting is losing his mind.

Doom say they’re going to win the tag titles.

Tag Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

This is masks vs. titles despite everyone knowing who Doom is. It’s Butch Reed and Ron Simmons, as in two of the three black wrestlers in the whole company. Sounds bad but it’s true. Reed rants for a bit before Simmons starts with Scott. It’s power vs. power here and the voice of Ron Simmons is unmistakable. Scott makes Simmons look like an idiot and it’s off to Reed (Doom #2).

Doom is sent to the floor as this is all Scott so far. Scott wants the mask already but Reed gets out just in case. The fans chant for Sting as Rick comes in. The basic idea of this match is Doom gets mad, a Steiner runs them around the ring a bit, suplex takes the Doom guy down, start over. Back off to the far bigger Simmons who pounds Scotty down a bit. Scott plays Ricky Morton for a bit as the beating is on.

People didn’t go for as many covers back in the day. Very interesting change in the times indeed. BIG spinebuster gets two for Reed but he picks him up. Scott grabs a backslide for two and a Piledriver gets the same. Sunset flip gets two on Reed but Scott can’t make the tag. There’s a Frankensteiner out of nowhere and it’s off to Rick. He manages to rip the mask off and it’s Butch Reed. Rick rolls up Reed a second later to end it.

Rating: D+. Yeah amazingly enough, this was boring. This whole show has been that way because the matches have been going far longer than they should have. The masks were pretty pointless here so it’s not like the titles were ever in any real jeopardy. Weak match in a running theme for tonight.

Apparently if Simmons doesn’t unmask he’s suspended. If his identity is supposed to be a secret, how could they suspend him? Either way he unmasks and Ross’ reaction of “It’s Ron Simmons” is almost funny it’s so anti-climactic.

We see Sting getting destroyed again.

The Horsemen are like yeah we’re awesome.

Ric Flair/Ole Anderson/Arn Anderson vs. Dragonmaster/Great Muta/Buzz Sawyer

The ones you haven’t heard of other than Muta is called the J-Tex Corporation and had been feuding with the Horsemen. They’re heel now though so this is heel vs. heel in a cage. Dragonmaster is a guy that was known as Kendo Nagasaki who you’ll hear of every once in awhile. There are more than one of him though so it might be a bit confusing.

Sawyer (that guy was NUTS) stars with Anderson. The fans are cheering for J-Tex, which would be like cheering for Vickie Guerrero today. The Horsemen hammer on Sawyer with Flair and he exchanging shots. Off to Ole as Cornette rants about Sting a lot. Dragonmaster hammers away and is cheered loudly. Muta comes in and the place pops HARD. He and Arn go at it and it’s handspring elbow time. And here’s Sting.

Sting charges the cage and the roof is blown off the place. He climbs up the side of it and hammers on Flair over the cage wall but is dragged down by security and other wrestlers. He gets up the aisle but charges again, this time not being able to get at Flair. Sting hops down as the match is more or less forgotten about. Sawyer misses a splash off the top of the cage and Sting appears to have hurt his leg. What wasn’t known at the time is that Sting had ripped some ligaments apart and wouldn’t wrestle for six months, meaning the title match was off. As for the match, everything breaks down and Arn pins Dragonmaster with a DDT.

Rating: D. Match sucked but it wasn’t the point at all. As I’d assume you figured out, Sting’s injury was the big deal here, as it completely changed the company and took all of the heat away from him because it was Luger that got the title shot and Flair held the title another six months instead of giving it to the young lion known as Sting. Either way, weak match to end a bad show.

Flair and Sting “fight” (remember Sting has one leg) in the aisle to end the show.

Overall Rating
: D-. Well Sting vs. Flair is made, but at the same time that match fell apart completely due to Flair’s egging him on for the second time there. Anyway, not a good show in the slightest but at the same time….yeah this was terrible. There’s no other way around it. The matches went on WAY too long and at the same time they weren’t that good. Weak show to put it mildly and I’m glad it’s over.

 

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