ECW on TNN
Date: October 8, 1999
Location: Civic Center, Houma, Louisiana
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re a step closer to November 2 Remember which I think is the flagship show but they only treat it like that once in awhile. The main story at the moment is the battling tag champions which was intensified after Raven cost Dreamer a match last week. Other than that we’re still waiting on most of our upcoming matches. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on the women of ECW. Tonight the performer formerly known as Sunny is going to blow the lid off of women in wrestling. It’s amazing how much more fun the girls were to look at when they could do more than awkwardly smile if they were good or frown if they were bad.

Theme song.

After Joey and Joel intro the show, we get a clip from late August in the ECW Arena and a Sunny (called Tammy Lynn Sytch here) vs. Francine catfight which is cut off pretty quickly.

Time for another match from Anarchy Rulz. It’s clipped on the TNN broadcast but here’s the match review in full.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy vs. Little Guido

During the entrances, Joey says he’s more or less high on laryngitis medications. Ok then. Tajiri is in his traditional look now. Crowd seems to favor Crazy the best. They point out the three distinct styles here which is a nice touch. Well this is better than another combination them going one on one again I guess. Oh and Big Sal is now the Big Salbowski. Give me a break.

Yes I get that it’s an intentional parody, but if this was the other way around, ECW would be FREAKING over WWF taking another idea from them. When ECW does it, it’s a parody though. Yeah that’s annoying. The chant of Where’s My Pizza starts up. WOW those get annoying. It’s your basic spotfest to start: stupid but fun. Guido hooks a camel clutch on Crazy and Tajiri kicks the tar out of him. They set for it again and Tajiri kicks the tar out of Guido. Nice one.

Tajiri hits a picture perfect moonsault to the floor to take out both guys. It was of the Asai breed in case you were curious. Guido hits a second rope Fameasser which looked good. Not sure why but it did. Crazy one ups Tajiri by hitting a top rope Asai moonsault and lands ON HIS FEET. That was awesome looking. In a SICK spot, Tajiri goes for a sunset flip on Crazy but it’s blocked. Tajiri pulls himself back up, spins crazy around and hooks the Tarantula.

Guido throws in a great double foot to the face. That was one of the coolest things I’ve seen in a long time. Guido gets the Sicilian Crab at the same time Crazy gets a camel clutch. Tajiri was totally off the ground. Ton of sick spots in this match. That baseball slide dropkick in the Tree of Woe is always great. Crazy follows that up with a moonsault to put Guido out.

It’s elimination rules in case you didn’t get that so we’re down to Tajiri and Crazy. The ten punch count being in Spanish is always a nice touch. The handspring elbow hits for Tajiri. We get a Super Loco chant. When they get creative like that I can live with them. Tajiri blocks the triple moonsault and just goes off on Crazy. A SICK brainbuster ends it.

Rating: B-. This is an odd match. The spots were great and I liked them a lot, but I just could not get into the match as a whole if that makes sense. I think it’s because this has been done so many times now that there’s just no real reason to care about this match. It was fun, but there’s just nothing of substance to it. Nice spot fest though.

Nice to see them use ¼ of their show on an old match.

We talk about Sunny being introduced to the world in SMW in 1994, which would be when she was 21. The shots here are of her in a swimsuit, and based on how she looked in WWF, imagine how good she looks here. We get a bio of her and how the pressure got to her. She talks about how she started abusing prescription drugs, namely Soma. She talks about how Louis Spicolli died from overdosing on it and alcohol.

Here’s another match from Anarchy Rulz, this time the opener.

Lance Storm vs. Jerry Lynn

We start with this? Really? I guess part of anarchy is that we’re getting rid of the best match right off the bat for some reason. Dawn Marie’s dress is almost not even there. These are two of my favorites from ECW so I’ll be pleased with this more than likely. Jerry’s ribs are messed up because the Impact Players beat him up about a week before.

Lance Storm having his own personal chick is just amusing. Crowd is pretty one sided to say the least. We have a nice technical piece to start. Did you expect anything else? The fans applaud which is always a good sign. ECW fans were fair if nothing else. I’ve always liked Joey’s mentioning of the referees. They work extremely hard and rarely get the credit that they deserve. Storm’s chops kind of suck.

There’s a bad delay right before it connects and it makes them look really weak. The fans get bored with the match and would like to see something from Dawn. Cyrus gets a nice line in by saying that Storm is a step ahead of Gene Kiniski who was billed as Canada’s Greatest Athlete: he’s CALGARY’S Greatest Athlete. That’s a great line and could be solid for a heel in a territorial promotion.

The referee yells at someone at ringside for a LONG time with his eyes totally away from the action. Nice one guys. Jerry hits a nice plancha from the top rope to the floor and down goes Storm. Having Cyrus as an analyst is a GREAT help. Joey is fun to listen to but there is simply too much to have one guy do. That’s not a knock on Styles. It’s too much for anyone. Having an analyst in there takes a ton of pressure off of Joey and it’s helping a lot.

Cradle piledriver is blocked. Again, can someone explain the difference to me? SWEET pinfall reversal sequence that goes on for nearly a minute straight. That’s VERY impressive and literally gets a standing ovation from the crowd. They go wide to show it and they well should. Amazing stuff as I knew it would be. Cyrus points out that he used to be a wrestler which is something that needs to be done more often.

TNA has been doing it more often lately as they point out that Taz used to be a wrestler. He’s been retired what, 9 years or so? A LOT of fans likely haven’t seen him wrestle. How long has it been for King? Point out to the fans that he actually has experience. Jerry is a former world champion as is Taz. Let the fans know that once in awhile. There’s a chair wedged in the corner that hasn’t been doing anything yet.

Lynn is thrown into the corner but slides to avoid the steel macguffin. He slams his ribs into the post though and Storm goes after it like a Hart-trained wrestler attempting to use basic psychology. Lynn hits a Stunner out of nowhere to get us back to even. I love when wrestlers just bust out random moves.

It makes no sense that so many guys only use their signature stuff. Use whatever comes to mind, at least in kayfabe terms. Storm hits a knee to the ribs and hooks a ¾ nelson of all things for the clean pin? That came out of NOWHERE. It’s fine to end it that way as it looked solid, but DANG that was random.

Rating: A-. I loved this and yes it’s biased. Even still though, this was very solid stuff. See what happens with simple psychology and good wrestling? It works very well indeed and you get a great match that I was way into. This worked and to be fair it’s probably because they’re two of my favorites in ECW.

House show ads.

They air the November 2 Remember ad twice in a row.

Sunny talks about being the Kliq Chick and how she didn’t like being looked at as someone that should get pushed because of who she was hanging out with/sleeping with. She says her first drink was after she left the WWF. For some reason I have a few issues believing that. Sunny talks about her niece dying and Paul pushes her to talk more. She blasts some of the other girls in the business and says she’ll set the standard and she’s still alive. End of show.

Overall Rating: I. As in Incomplete. This was Sunny babbling about nothing of note in what was supposed to be an expose. The “expose” wound up being her saying she hung out with the Kliq and that the other girls aren’t as good as her. On top of that they can’t even film new matches for anything so it’s back to Anarchy Rulz again. We’ve seen almost half of that show here on TNN. They had like four nights a week of house shows and they couldn’t film 45 minutes worth of stuff? The wrestling we got was fine but when it was all old stuff, what’s the point?

Remember to like this on Facebook and follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: September 24, 1999
Location: Flickinger Center, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 3,960
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

Back with the fifth episode of this show. We’re past Anarchy Rulz now and the most important thing is that Mike Awesome is the new world champion. Tazz lost the belt because he’s heading to WWF which was a major blow to ECW, especially after losing the Dudleys two weeks earlier. This is around the time I started watching the show infrequently so I’ll probably remember some of this stuff. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey open the show. Joe is like Fred Flintstone because he makes the ladies’ bed rock. Joey invites Dreamer to the ring along with Francine. He asks Dreamer about his bad back but Gertner cuts him off to talk about Francine. She isn’t pure apparently but Joel has a girl in the back that certainly is. That would be Miss Congeniality. She comes out and is pretty clearly a hooker. CATFIGHT! Congeniality came out with Doring and Roadkill and it’s time for a brawl. Since this is ECW, it becomes this.

Tag Titles: Tommy Dreamer vs. Danny Doring/Roadkill

The two of them beat up Dreamer to start because there’s no partner. Raven runs in after about 45 seconds and pins Doring with a DDT. The champions leave separately. Congeniality takes a DDT as well.

For those of you unfamiliar, Miss Congeniality is probably better known to you by her other wrestling name: Lita.

Opening sequence.

Dreamer calls out Raven for a fight. Dreamer comes back out but won’t get in the ring.

House show ads.

November 2 Remember ad.

Call the ECW Hotline!

We look at the history of Taz with the world title, starting with him making Shane pass out.

We get a clip from the PPV of Tanaka arriving and being interviewed when Judge Jeff Jones (Awesome’s manager) arrives and yells at Tanaka. Tanaka rams him into the car and walks off.

Post break Heyman is holding Joey back from killing Joel. Joel insults Heyman so Joey has to hold Paul back. Funny, but I have no idea what the point was.

We get highlights from Storm vs. Lynn with Storm scoring the upset. We also see Sabu beat up Justin Credible, only to lose to That’s Incredible.

We see from the beginning of the world title match up until Taz being eliminated. Here’s the pasted part from the PPV review.

ECW World Title: Masato Tanaka vs. Taz vs. Mike Awesome

No intro or anything. Joey just says it’s time for our world title match. The fans throw a TON of stuff into the ring because of Taz. He sold out apparently. No. Heyman screwed up the booking of him because no one cared about him as a face after he whined for a year and Shane Douglas wouldn’t drop the title like he should have. I still say that had as much to do with killing ECW as anything did. That and not putting the belt on RVD about 5 months before this.

Mike Awesome is in the crowd and Taz says send him in there too. Heyman comes out and holds Awesome back. I love how the fans go from YOU SOLD OUT to yelling his catchphrase with him inside of a minute. Remember that officially Taz hasn’t been announced as leaving yet but it’s the worst kept secret in wrestling. Heyman makes it a threeway.

So yeah add Mike Awesome to the title because I’m lazy. Oh and Awesome is in wrestling gear in the crowd. I’m shocked too. They double team him and that doesn’t work at all. Tanaka takes an Awesome Bomb. And then the Roaring Elbow and Awesome Splash puts Taz out in about two minutes. There you go then.

The locker room empties so that everyone can say goodbye to Taz.

Little Guido vs. Super Crazy

Joey’s voice is messed up so Joel is on his own. They feel each other out to start with Guido hooking a cross armbreaker on the mat. The speed continues and Guido gets thrown into the corner. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker sends him to the floor so Crazy hits a hard suicide dive and they go into the crowd. HUGE top rope Asai Moonsault into the people has the crowd screaming like…well like an ECW crowd.

A superplex brings Guido back in and gets two. This has been one sided so far, and that would probably be the sign of Guido’s comeback. Surfboard by Crazy which he shifts into a Dragon Sleeper while the legs are still hooked. Lionsault misses and Guido hooks a sweet seated full nelson into a dragon suplex position for two. He works on the arm a bit and throws Crazy to the floor where Big Sal throws him into the barricade.

Back in for a Fujiwara Armbar, followed by a top rope Fameasser for two. Guido distracts the referee so Sal (weighs about 600lbs) can splash Crazy for two. The beating continues but Crazy grabs a DDT out of nowhere for two. He loads up the three moonsaults but hits knees on the second. Sal comes in again but his powerbomb is countered. A brainbuster pins Guido a second later.

Rating: C+. This was the usual great stuff between any combination of these two and Tajiri. The thing here though is that Tajiri and Crazy actually moved up the card after this, which is something WCW never quite got right. I could have done with a lot less Sal in this, but that goes for almost any Guido match.

Post match Sal jumps Crazy so Spike comes out and beats him up. There’s a three count so this was officially a match but whatever.

House show ad.

Here are Storm and Dawn Marie for a chat. We go to a break before they get in and when we come back, RVD is saying Lynn from an Impact Players beating. Johnny Smith runs in for a 3-2 beating when the lights go out. It’s Sabu of course and the beating is on. Sabu takes out Justin as Lynn makes his comeback.

We cut to the announcers and when we cut back the ring is full of people brawling. I mean there are like 15 guys in there and here’s New Jack for the big beating.

And never mind as it’s back to the announcers with like 2 minutes left to tell us who won the world title at the PPV. It’s Mike Awesome and Taz hands the belt to him. The locker room hugs Taz and that’s it.

Overall Rating: D. What a mess this was. These 20 second “matches” that are out of nowhere are really getting old as they don’t advance anything and are there to pop the live crowd. That’s the opposite of what WCW did, as everything was about the TV crowd. To paraphrase Lance Storm: “You look at the TV camera because there are a few thousand people in the arena and millions on the other side of the camera.” It’s common sense, which is something ECW lacked at times.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

And follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: September 17, 1999
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

Back with another episode, I believe the forth one. The main event tonight is again Lynn vs. RVD which was at least more enjoyable last time. Other than that we’ve got some very short matches which I’m sure will please the fans in Philly but won’t do jack for the rest of the country. These shows at least go by quickly. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of Raven and Dreamer pinning Rhyno/Victory to keep the titles, presumably at a PPV or somewhere. Raven only popped up at the end to retain again. Apparently this was the very ending of a match that was happening before the TV taping begin.

Cyrus’ ban has been lifted and he’ll be at the PPV, according to Cyrus. Fonzie says the only person in danger is Justin Credible for having Sabu banned in the first place. Sabu pops up and since this is the REAL ECW, he doesn’t talk.

Theme song.

Spike Dudley vs. PN News

Yes, it’s THAT PN News. Acid Drop, pin in less than thirty seconds.

Someone has been injured and is being taken out in an ambulance but we don’t know who.

Super Crazy vs. Tajiri

This is joined in progress with Tajiri in control. He powerbombs Crazy to the floor and they go into the crowd for a bit which doesn’t get them anywhere. Missile dropkick misses so Crazy hits him diez times in the corner. The handspring elbow misses but Tajiri does that submission where he bends Crazy over his back and spins him around. The Japanese guy hits a German on the Mexican but he walks into a powerbomb for the pin. Too short to rate but it was the usual fast paced goodness from these two.

We go to a playground at night with Raven hanging out by the swings. He talks about the two year war with Dreamer and we get some highlights from it. We get the “It’s Tommy’s” line from Beulah about her baby which is still awesome. Raven talks about how he took Dreamer to school and after two years, it was time for Dreamer to graduate. The pop when Dreamer pins him is still great. Then Dreamer let Beulah get hurt by the Dudleys, so now Raven has to save him again. This didn’t make a lot of sense but it’s Raven so it rarely did.

Here are Storm and Dawn Marie unscheduled.

TV Title: Lance Storm vs. Rob Van Dam

This means that it was Lynn in the ambulance earlier at the hands of the Impact Players. While Van Dam is walking around high fiving fans, Storm dives onto him to take over. Springboard missile dropkick puts Van Dam down and Storm crotches him on the top rope. Chair to the head puts Van Dam….not down at all as he hits a one footed kick to the chair, kind of like a Van Daminator from the top. And here’s Justin for the double beatdown.

Lynn, all taped up makes the save but a British dude named Johnny Smith runs in to make it 3-2 in favor of the Players.

Lynn is being taken out after a break but Rob runs his mouth enough to get Lynn off the stretcher and into the ring for the scheduled title match.

TV Title: Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob charges at him and we go straight to their usual “you can’t hit me but I can’t hit you either” sequence, resulting in a double clothesline. Spin kick gets two for Rob. Lynn cross bodies him to the floor but his bad ribs are sent into the barricade. Rob tries a Van Daminator but Lynn has a brain and pelts Rob with the chair. They both get onto the barricade and Lynn hits something like a bulldog to send Van Dam face first into a chair.

He picks up the chair and there’s the Van Daminator. That gets two back in the ring but Rob is still sore from the beating earlier. Lynn sits up to avoid Rolling Thunder but gets kicked down so that the split legged moonsault can get two. Fonzie throws in a chair but Rob lays it down in the corner. Lynn jumps over Rob in the corner but gets kicked in the face then kicked again, this time from the middle rope for two.

Now the chair is put in the middle of the ring. Rob tries the running monkey flip out of the corner but Lynn jumps out of the way and hits a powerbomb out of the corner onto the chair for two. Bridging German gets the same. Van Dam has a small cut above his eye. They go to the corner and the champ hits a BIG clothesline to put Lynn on the floor and through a table.

The match stops for a bit as Lynn is in agony and almost has to leave. Eventually he comes back to a big ovation and gets suplexed back inside. Rob goes for the chair but as he picks it up, Lynn dropkicks it into his face for two. Cradle piledriver is countered as is Van Dam’s northern lights suplex by a DDT from Lynn. That gets two and both guys are spent.

A superplex from Lynn puts both guys down again and gets an eventual two for Lynn. Van Dam grabs a small package for two as well as a rollup for the same. Fonzie pops Lynn with a chair but the Five Star misses. Lynn covers off the miss but THAT gets two. Van Daminator FINALLY gets the pin on Lynn.

Rating: B. This was probably my favorite of the 9000 matches these guys had. The near falls were great and the injury angle helped a lot. Joey seemed to have a conspiracy theory going on about how Lynn wasn’t really jumped or something, but I don’t think anything ever came of it. This was a really fun match and for a TV show, this was excellent.

Lynn gets a big ovation to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Given that one match was almost half the show, that gives this a pretty positive ending. The rest of it was pretty stupid, but for once they have some clear stories going on. They don’t however use the show to build up the PPV, which is probably the whole point of it. The Van Dam vs. Lynn match is good, but once you see them fight 10 times it loses some of the appeal. Good show, probably the best so far.

Here’s Anarchy Rulz if you’re interested:

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

And follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Guilty As Charged 2001
Date: January 7, 2001
Location: Hammerstein Ballroom, New York City, New York
Attendance: 2,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Cyrus

It ends here. Or at least it should have since there was the WWE version which was good but not ECW and then there’s the TNA version which will be bad but ECW. This is the final ECW PPV in the original incarnation of the Tribe of Extreme. The main event is more or less a ladder match with Sandman vs. Credible vs. Corino for the title. Other than that there’s a semi-famous Dreamer vs. Anderson I Quit match which I’ve never seen. Let’s get to it, even though this is all that’s left to get to.

Oh and RVD isn’t on the card here since he wasn’t paid either.

We open with a long music video with no real purpose other than highlights of the previous few PPVs. Keep in mind there were no national TV shows and very limited syndicated channels and barely any touring. In a sense, the company was just going PPV to PPV for anything. The video is at three minutes already.

A little telling sign of ECW’s problems: while the place looks full, notice the listed attendance. A full house is great, but not when it’s less than 3,000 people to fill it. Joel does his usual stuff but gets dirtier than usual, although it’s rather funny. He introduces Matthews and York who he is now managing.

Random note here: it wasn’t known that the company was going out of business. There was supposed to be another PPV in March but they canceled it in February and went out of business just after Wrestlemania. In other words, for about 10 days, ECW was in fact the second biggest wrestling company in the country due to WCW being out of business. Pay no attention to the fact that Heyman was working for WWF or that they hadn’t had a show in about two months and let Heyman have his moment.

Anyway Da Baldies jump York and Matthews and beat up Gertner in the aisle. And here are Cyrus and Lynn with an evil referee while the Baldies continue the beatdown. Lynn hits York with a Cradle Piledriver and Cyrus gets the pin. That somehow was an opening match. Between Joel finishing his poem and the three count, which included a speech, the intro, the beatdown, an extension of the beatdown and the pin, five minutes passed, hence the short description and no official inro to a match.

Lynn says he’s not a jobber to the stars anymore and he’s the New F’N Show. He also lets us know that RVD isn’t the biggest star. Lynn won’t wrestle a non man event either.

Theme song. I still fail to see why we needed a few minutes out of every PPV for this.

Tag Titles: Hot Commodity vs. Danny Doring/Roadkill

The backs of the belts are purple. I wouldn’t have bet on that one. Doring and Dinero start us off. Basically we’re just waiting for the hot tag to Roadkill to have him clean house. And there he is, earlier than I expected, for the beatdown. Hart Attack (called the Lancaster Lariat of Lust) connects.

We go to the floor and Doring kind of botches a Poetry in Motion over the top rope. Hamrick interference gets two as this isn’t much of a match. It’s ok but it’s going a bit too fast. Money hits the Crash Landing which would be his finisher in his brief run in WCW at the end of the company. Dinero hits a SWEET dropkick to put Roadkill on the floor.

It’s back to waiting on the big hot tag to Roadkill which is basic and smart booking. I like the funny little names that are all based around sex for Doring. At least they’re trying. He comes in and destroys everyone and the big double clothesline has Hot Commodity in trouble. Dinero’s finisher is called the Jalapeno Popper. Seriously? Hamrick comes in but does nothing as the Buggy Back (wheelbarrow/legdrop combo) ends it.

Rating: D+. Nothing that special here but it was ok. The champions were in trouble a bit too long for my taste but it certainly wasn’t horrible. This was just a gimme tag title defense for the champions which is fine. The match wasn’t much, although that could be that I can’t stand Hot Commodity.

The heels start a big beatdown and here’s Nova for the save, leading to this.

Nova vs. Chris Hamrick

Sure why not. Nova is different here somehow apparently. He’s leaner and very popular, so of course he’s in a thrown together match early in the show against a guy that’s no challenge to him. He goes for the leg for some reason and hooks a figure four. Well that didn’t last as Elektra comes in to break it up.

Hamrick gets a nice rana off the top to take over. Nova Hulks Up and an enziguri takes Hamrick down. He gets a huge chant as Cyrus insists he’s not fan friendly now. Elektra comes in again to annoy me so she gets kicked in the head by Nova. I like this new guy. Down goes the referee. Sure because in a company where there are no disqualifications we need a referee.

Chris Chetti, who Nova beat in a loser leaves ECW match, comes in and counts a pin on Nova. And here’s Spike for no apparent reason. Lou E. Dangerously says he would never be a Dudley, which is the joke since he used to be Sign Guy Dudley. A big brawl erupts and Nova hits a Swanton on Chetti and Kryptonite Krunch to end Hamrick because that was still going on.

Rating: D+. Decent match between two high fliers but the insanity just got annoying of course. I have no idea why Spike had any point there but whatever. Naturally Chetti and Nova would be supposed to feud again because having a Loser Leaves ECW match wasn’t enough somehow. This was of course angle building with wrestling on the side. Not a fan of that at all.

Cornio says he’s getting his belt back tonight, which Sandman stole.

CW Anderson vs. Tommy Dreamer

This is an I Quit match and is your standard veteran vs. young punk with something to prove feud. Dreamer is in a freaking Logan’s Roadhouse shirt. Is he a waiter on the side since he’s not getting paid? I’m not sure if I’m kidding there or not. We’re on the floor immediately as Cyrus is irritating. Back in the ring and Dreamer has a Dragon Sleeper of all things.

Anderson goes to the arm which is likely hurt since it’s Tommy Dreamer. Why should an I Quit match be a wrestling match? Cyrus wants it to be technical which is completely against the idea of the match but whatever. Dreamer goes violent with the ring bell hammer and busts Anderson open. Fairly sick drop toehold into the back of a chair busts Dreamer open.

CW works on the knee which doesn’t really get him anywhere. Dreamer takes some very bad looking unprotected chair shots and busts out a ring of barbed wire. The towel boy from the last show comes in and helps Dreamer beat him up. And there’s a metal sheet to the non-wrestler. Throw in a suplex and I’m sure he’s perfectly fine right?

Spinebuster onto the wire, called razor wire here, and of course Anderson goes for the arm instead of the back which was just slammed into barbed wire. We switch back to the spine as he goes through some chairs. Ok make that the neck as it’s all Anderson here. It’s table time but Anderson goes through it. They take part of it and Dreamer chokes him out for the victory.

Rating: C. Not bad but if this is supposed to be a classic in ECW I fail to see it. Also, nice job of elevating Anderson there by giving the win to the old man that still has never quit. I don’t get this one really and while it was a good beatdown, the psychology was just not there at all as Anderson couldn’t just pick a body part. It’s ok but nothing great at all.

We now hit the WTF part of our show.

Francine is making jokes about a huge sandwich and Corino comes in. He says he’s the world champion so she should screw him. She says no because of the lack of belt. He asks where Justin is and she says in the bathroom with Missy Hyatt. Naturally Corino doesn’t buy it but after he leaves, out walks Justin with his pants unbuckled and is followed by Missy Hyatt in a towel. She says she’s screwed him twice already today and to just let Justin screw Francine already. Missy leaves and Corino and Jack Victory are STUNNED. Victory wants some too because she used to manage him in Texas (true story) but she doesn’t remember. She asks if she screwed him. This was completely pointless but absolutely hilarious.

Website ad/house show ad (including the final show 6 days after this)/ad for Living Dangerously which didn’t happen.

FBI vs. Kid Kash/Super Crazy vs. Tajiri/Mikey Whipwreck

The winners are the #1 contenders. Tajiri in a hat is just funny for some reason. It always has been. Three people in at once here and it’s elimination. Kash, Mikey and Mamaluke start us off. Mikey’s laugh is awesome. Kash botches the heck out of a springboard and faceplants to draw a huge chant against him.

The fans do the whole pizza/Sal E ate it deal which gets old fast. Crazy vs. Tajiri starts up and the value of the show instantly rises. Kash misses another big dive and it’s breaking down very fast. Yeah forget that whole three in the ring at once. Crazy does a big dive and of course Kash out does him. Make no mistake about him: the guy could fly with the best of them.

Crazy goes for another dive and completely misses in a painful looking spot. Sal kills Kash with a splash to take out him and Crazy. And so of course it’s these two teams again because we haven’t seen this match enough. Mikey drops DiBiase punches which makes me smile. Mamaluke gets freaking destroyed and both he and his partner are put in the Tree of Woe.

Naturally they take over in about 9 seconds because they can. Double Powerbomb off the top to Mikey to more or less end him. And of course that gets two also. Mikey gets the hot tag and is of course fine just afterwards. The lack of selling in this match is painful. Chairs are involved and are of course nothing special. Double suplexes end it. Well at least it’s over.

Rating: D+. This was just a tag team triple threat. There was no real point to it and while it wasn’t horrible, there just wasn’t anything at all to talk about in it, which is clearly why I wrote four paragraphs on it. It just wasn’t an interesting match in the slightest and it never got off the ground. The title match would have been good too which is a shame they had to go out of business.

Same ads as early.

Sandman says he’s the most likely to win. How did he get into the world title picture without winning anything for like a year?

Simon Diamond/Swinger vs. Balls Mahoney/Chilly Willy

What kind of a name is Swinger? In WCW he was Johnny Swinger and here he’s just Swinger. That never made sense. Swinger talks about not getting any from Dawn Marie while Simon has, so he’s gone out and gotten Jasmine St. Clair. She and Blue Boy come out and apparently Blue Boy is his new manager. Oh look: another pointless midcard faction. After about a minute of brawling, Rhyno comes in and gores everyone including the women. Well there’s five minutes filled. Jasmine takes a piledriver off the middle rope.

Again with the ads!

Rhyno says he’s just begun.

ECW World Title: Steve Corino vs. Sandman vs. Justin Credible

So the main event is starting an hour and forty minutes into the show? THESE guys are going to go an hour? Why do I not think this is possible in the slightest? This is a ladder match but it’s billed as ladders, tables, chairs and canes. Where does that sound familiar from? Sandman’s entrance is three minutes so far as Joey actually talks about psychology regarding the entrance. That actually makes sense. Apparently it’s like icing a kicker. Makes sense.

The match starts after we spend five minutes on his intro. We start with brawling as Cyrus says Justin will unload on them like he did on Missy. It’s a spotfest and not a particularly good one. Sandman goes for the belt a few times to no avail. He goes through a table and I guess the fans are impressed.

Sandman beats up everyone and goes up the ladder. Justin is ready to make the save but the ladder breaks. Well what else did you expect? Sandman goes through a table again in a spot that made me think I had rewound the tape by mistake. Tombstone to Corino and Francine hits a rana on Sandman for no apparent reason. BIG ladder is brought in by Sandman.

Cornio and Justin go up and just like KOTR 99 the belt goes up. Just like KOTR 99, it was never explained as far as I know. Corino and Justin go through a table and Sandman goes up to win the belt. Yeah that’s it as the main event is over at three minutes past ten.

Rating: D+. Spotfest, but not a very good one. Sandman going through table after table was rather annoying and repetitive. This wasn’t horrible but it feels completely anti-climactic. Sandman is champion again and is a more believable choice than either of them but at the same time he’s the old guy that hasn’t meant anything in forever. I’m not wild on this at all.

Corino shakes Justin’s hand and here come….Da Baldies? They fight Justin and Corino to the back which has Joey shocked, as the two singles guys are fighting together.

And here’s Rhyno who gores Sandman. He wants to know why he’s the TV Champion when there is no TV in this company. He wants the world title and wants his shot RIGHT NOW. The announcers say he’s not very brave. Yeah he’s so brave to jump a guy he’s destroyed every time they’ve fought. Rhyno threatens to kill his family if he doesn’t get a match. Sandman says ring the bell.

ECW World Title: Sandman vs. Rhyno

Gore gets two, the fans chant RVD, Sandman gets pile driven through a table, Sandman kicks out, piledriver on a broken table, Rhyno is champion after like a minute.

Cyrus comes out and says Rhyno is the unified champion, meaning the TV Title is officially dead. He issues the open challenge and NOW RVD comes out to answer. Joey is shocked that RVD wants the world title. Good thing Rob was in his gear and stretched just in case there was an open challenge.

ECW World Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Rhyno

And never mind as here’s Jerry Lynn for a Dusty Finish and the fans aren’t exactly thrilled.

Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

So here’s your last 20 minutes or so of the show. The fans are glad to see Van Dam as I guess this was supposed to set up RVD vs. Rhyno. Lynn is in shorts which is a weird sight. The TICKED OFF RVD has time to talk to the fans of course. We stall a lot as Joey gives us the pride crap. No contact is made for about two minutes as we have to kill some time since it couldn’t be spent wrestling.

They fight on the floor and RVD’s mouth is busted a bit. WAY too much stalling here. Van Dam does his normal stuff on the floor as it’s very clear they’re just trying to fill time at this point. This is really just a match and not a great one. The psychology in the third one made it far more interesting but here it’s just you take over then I take over. Some fans yell something about a bald guy or other and are cheered when he gets thrown out.

I know I’m not saying much here but there isn’t much to say. Since there’s no angle here or title on the line there’s no feeling to this match at all and it’s really hurting it. Also it doesn’t help at all that Lynn is a horrible heel. He had his most successful few months of his career so he wants to change all that. Sure why not.

Lynn gets a DDT on a chair for two as this is just dragging. Five Star doesn’t hit and Lynn gets two. And here’s Joel Gertner to beat up Cyrus for general purposes I guess. Van Daminator gets no cover as I wonder why you would EVER hold up a chair in an RVD match. It’s just so stupid. Gertner helps set up the Van Terminator to kill Lynn dead and end it. And that’s the final ECW match in the history of the original PPV era.

Rating: C-. Just not interesting at all. It’s an ok match as most of them were, but I still find this to be a completely overrated series. This is by far and away the weakest they’ve ever done and just never became interesting. It’s not a bad match, but it’s way too long and had no real point other than being the wrestling match on the last half hour of the show. I just couldn’t get into it at all.

Credible and Lynn are the New Impact Players. That’s how the show ends. Oh and with Francine blowing her line.

Overall Rating: D. I’m going through the card here and without looking at the ratings, the best I can give a match is the I Quit match which was just ok. There just was nothing at all here to warrant paying a dime, or in this case $21.95, to see. This just wasn’t an interesting show at all. Sandman, the one guy of the three the fans accept as a main event player, wins the title and then Rhyno, a guy that had trouble with Spike last month is here to steal it?

I thought the point of a monster was to be a MONSTER and not have to steal a title. RVD vs. Rhyno should have been at least six months earlier but I guess it was supposed to be the Living Dangerously match. This show just didn’t have anything good going for it and it showed badly. Bad way to go out, but the one silver lining was that they had some new stuff planned it seemed, including RVD going for the world title. Shame that’s only two years too late to give the company another breath of air. Oh and the show ended at 10:35, yet the Simon/Swinger match clocked in at 48 seconds.

So now we come to the hard part and probably the feature attraction here: the final thoughts on ECW. Now it’s no secret that I was never a fan of the original ECW. I thought the company was way overhyped and just straight up not very good. ECW was in fact one of the most influential companies in the world with some very innovative stuff. Then it stopped being innovative. Everyone was cursing, everyone had hot women, everyone used weapons, everyone had the more adult angles. They also got talent from ECW and Heyman just never came back.

If you look back at the ECW PPV guys and the reactions they were getting, it became increasingly clear that the midcard was the most popular section of the show. This is where one of the big ECW talking points comes into play: the TV Title and the World Title were sometimes on equal footing. That does not work. Even in a company today like WWE where there is enough talent to have two full rosters and they’re still crowded, people don’t like more than one champion. The other thing to consider is that to the masses, the TV Title was known as the belt worn by guys like Ultimo Dragon, Yuji Nagata, Alex Wright and Prince Iaukea.

You can make the case all you want that the titles were equal and that the matches for the TV Title were better. That very well may be true, but it doesn’t matter what reality is. What matters is how your audience perceives it. Take for example John Cena. Anyone with eyes can see that Cena is a talented wrestler and has far more than 5 moves. However, the people think he’s overrated and that’s all that matters. RVD vs. Lynn for the TV Title might be the best match on the card, but it’s not for the World Title. Fans are familiar with the idea of the World Champion being the important guy.

This transitions into my next point: Rob Van Dam and the Heavyweight Title. Now I’ve long since argued that the company was in trouble the day Shane Douglas got hurt. Shane was world champion and him dropping the belt to Taz was about as much of a given as you could ask for. The problem is that when Shane got hurt, Taz was the hottest thing in the company. Shane gets hurt for like 3 months and doesn’t drop the title until January, six months after his injury. The problem was that Taz had to just sit around for six months waiting on the shoulder to heal and people didn’t care when he won the belt.

This sets off a domino effect as Taz now has an 8 month reign and no one cares by this point and he has no one to fight. Van Dam is getting more and more popular so the belt goes on Mike Awesome for about seven months and then after a few short reigns (as in two in less than ten days) it goes to Justin Credible. Wait….what? Credible had a career win total of nothing important and yet he’s the world champion? This was the problem for the rest of the company’s run of nearly two years: the champions had never done jack.

The final three champions for all intents and purposes were Credible, Lynn and Corino. The problem is these three had a combined one important win: Lynn beat RVD when he had a bunch of ring rust and there was no title on the line. The problem was the Andre the Giant syndrome: as long as RVD was around and they didn’t beat him, the fans didn’t accept these guys as the world champion. This is what I’m getting at with the RVD issues the whole time. He had well received matches with Jerry Lynn for the TV Title. Why couldn’t they be for the world title? To the average and casual fans, he’s the midcard champion. That doesn’t sell a lot of new PPVs.

This is one of my final (I think) points: the impromptu matches and insane PPVs. These are fine once in awhile, but the thought that pops into my head is something I read in the Death of WCW book, so please note this is not my original idea but it fits ECW perfectly. Imagine if say McDonalds sold one thing: the mystery meal. You don’t know what’s in it but just that it’s edible food. It could be fish, chicken, hamburger etc. You know it’s one, but not specifically. How many people do you think would eat there? ECW PPVs were the same (to a degree): you were going to get wrestling, but you didn’t know what it was going to be.

Having random matches is fine once in awhile, but eventually you have to stand by what you’re offering and live or die by it. Having RVD vs. Lynn on this show doesn’t mean anything because even if it’s the second coming of Steamboat vs. Flair it doesn’t add a single buy because the only people that would see it have already bought the show. Now if you advertise that RVD, the most popular guy in the company, is going to be there then you might sell some more shows and make more money. See what I’m getting at here? It’s ok once in awhile but not all the time.

All that being said, there were some good things about ECW. Their tag wrestling was solid and their midcard would have made even WCW drool at times. Super Crazy vs. Tajiri was great for instance. Some of the tag matches were awesome and the women were very hot. There was some solid in ring work too and the brawls were decent at times. It would have been nice to mix things up a bit with more wrestling and less brawling, but I get the idea I guess.

Overall the company was never going to be a giant. It simply wasn’t in the cards and that’s all there is to it. However, if they hadn’t stretched things way too far and tried to be the third national company, there’s a chance they could be around today. As a regional company with lower salaries, they definitely could have been around at least to a certain degree.

ECW was a company that tried very hard, but at the end of the day it just didn’t have enough to survive. It most certainly meant something to wrestling though and paved the way for the indy companies like CHIKARA and ROH today. It was a good idea and successful to a degree, but without changing, it was doomed to die, which it did.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

ECW on TNN
Date: September 10, 1999
Location: Lost Battalion Hall, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

Back with episode three as we keep getting closer to Anarchy Rulz. The Dudleys are officially gone so we move into a new era. Our main event tonight is RVD vs. Jerry Lynn for the TV Title which is considered the holy grail of feuds in ECW. The matches are good but I’ve never found them to be the masterpieces that people claim that they are. Anyway, let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of last week’s show where the titles changed hands.

Opening sequence.

House show ads during Rhyno’s entrance.

Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Before the ECWites start complaining, yes I know that’s the WWE spelling of it and that’s how I spell it. Get over it. Speed vs. power here. Crazy moves as fast as he can but his springboard moonsault press is caught in a powerslam for two. Rhyno is brand new here. He misses a charge and Crazy hits a springboard missile dropkick and a leg lariat of the same kind of two.

Gertner keeps trying to order Mexican food. Out to the floor and Rhyno is knocked into the crowd. HUGE Asai moonsault takes Rhyno out. Back in the ring and Rhyno starts up the power offense. Crazy comes back with a tornado DDT for two. Selling and being on offense for an extended period weren’t things commonly done in ECW. A moonsault gets knees and another powerslam gets two. Crazy counters a powerbomb into a rana for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match here with Crazy moving around quite well. The ECW midcard was usually very solid and this was one of their better periods. That being said, I eventually got tired of Tajiri vs. Crazy which happened for months on end. Decent little match here, although the ending was pretty weak. To be fair, Rhyno was brand new at this point so he didn’t have his whole deal down yet.

Post match Rhyno teases turning on his manager but destroys Crazy instead.

Since Tanaka and Awesome are challenging Taz for the title at the PPV, here’s their match from Heat Wave 98, which I’m copying and pasting. I’m not sure if the full version is shown on the TV show but this is the full review of if.

Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka

These two feuded for the better part of ever and Tanaka usually would win if you can believe that. Awesome was just a freak of nature to say the least. In a little known bit of trivia, Awesome is the step nephew of one Hulk Hogan. Awesome could do just about everything and jumped all over the ring like Rey Mysterio, but he was the size of Test or so. And there he goes with a huge dive over the top rope.

Tanaka gets a running start with a chair to nail Awesome in the freaking head. That looked painful. Basically all Tanaka can do is blast him with a chair. I’m not saying that’s all he’s capable of, but that that’s all he can get to work. A huge splash hits as this is rather physical. It’s not great but it’s far from bad as well. Tanaka takes a bunch of chair shots to the head but he Rises Up as the chair looks diseased.

The Awesome Bomb connects but Awesome wants to use a table instead. I hate those things. A chair shot from the top which should have killed Tanaka connects and still no cover. Tanaka escapes twice despite likely being legally dead and power bombs Awesome through the table.

I’ve officially lost this match now, as there comes a point where disbelief can’t be suspended anymore. The Roaring Elbow connects for the second time but only the first time that it was either noticed or that Awesome sold it. A tornado DDT on a chair ends it with Tanaka getting the pin.

Rating: C+. Well it was a good brawl but not much more. The amount of kickouts was just dumb near the end, as half of those bumps should have killed them. It certainly was exciting if nothing else though. The good thing is that the matches didn’t really get bad but they never really got better either. This was fun.

House show ads.

TV Title: Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

Jerry doesn’t even get an entrance. Van Dam is champion and has been for the better part of ever, which is about accurate I believe. They slug it out to start and we get a pretty sweet gymnastics routine until a standoff. They both pose but as Rob does, Lynn kicks him to the floor. Lynn hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take Rob out and we take a break. Back with Lynn being thrown into the barricade but RVD misses the Van Daminator because Lynn comes up with the brilliant idea of throwing the chair back.

Rob hits a moonsault off the barricade to take Lynn out. Joel: “That piece of commentary brought to you by the master of the obvious.” THANK YOU! That’s what gets on my nerves about Styles: he spends so much time saying the moves we’re seeing. This isn’t radio. I know what a moonsault looks like. Back in and Van Dam drops a legdrop onto a chair onto Lynn’s face.

Van Dam comes in with his top rope kick to take Lynn down for a close two. Fonzie throws in a chair and Rob loads up Jerry for a superplex onto said chair but Jerry counters into a sunset bomb onto it for two. They do a pretty nice sequence with the chair with both guys trying to hit the other with it, ending with Van Dam dropkicking it into Lynn’s head. Van Dam’s monkey flip is countered and Jerry hits a Van Daminator of his own for two.

Lynn hits a tornado DDT onto the chair and both guys are down. A delayed cover gets two for Lynn and the chair is thrown to the side. Lynn loads up the cradle piledriver but RVD counters into a pretty good pinfall reversal sequence. That gets a standing ovation and they clothesline each other….and the Impact Players run in for the no contest.

Rating: B-. Good match here but the chair got a little annoying. That’s part of my problem with ECW in general: I get that it’s a hardcore based company, but I’d like to see some more wrestling before we get to something like that. Good match though, and it’s clear why they couldn’t give us an ending here, which is ok.

The Impact Players (Justin Credible/Lance Storm with Jason and the smoking hot Dawn Marie) say they’re more deserving to close the show than these two.

We get a highlight package of the Impact Players’ greatest hits.

Lynn vs. RVD is made again for next week and a winner is guaranteed.

House show ads end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Another pretty decent show here. The major perk of these shows is that they’re really short, running about 45 minutes and a good deal of that is taken up by house show ads and stuff that goes by really quickly. The show was entertaining enough though so I can see why people were fans of it. Decent show.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

Living Dangerously 1999
Date: March 21, 1999
Location: Asbury Park Convention Center, Asbury Park, New Jersey
Attendance: 3,900
Commentator: Joey Styles

So Taz is world champion. Yep that’s about all there is to it at this point. Other than that there isn’t a ton going on here. Shane is on his way out and the company is in trouble. They wouldn’t be on national TV for another few months and this is really a dry spell for them.

The problem was no one bought Taz as champion after the “big” win for reasons I’ve already given. Other than that, the main thing here is RVD vs. Lynn starts up. Now I have only seen one of their matches in their seemingly never ending series, so let’s get to this. Yep the card looks like crap. I’m stunned.

Some guy asks Taz what it’s going to be like when there’s the unification match tonight. It’s the FTW Title vs. the ECW Title. Good to know. He calls out Austin and Flair, the other world champions and a bunch of other guys. Give me a break Taz. Fits the character though.

Joey welcomes us to the show. Having the logo on the mat helps a lot. We hype up the main event because we haven’t had Sabu vs. Taz in awhile. Ok then.

Play the theme song monkeys!

Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

It’s a rematch from the last PPV, which is a good idea as it came from out of nowhere and was awesome. Tajiri’s hair looks more like it would later on so that’s a bit more like it. Apparently there have been other matches and this is the blowoff to it. Now this is a match where I wonder something: how do they call spots? Not trying to sound rude or anything but do they speak the same languages?

We start with a lot of nice looking spots which don’t accomplish anything but they got the crowd impressed so that’s a perk. Big old standing ovation for that and I can’t blame them. Love that handspring elbow. Naturally this is more of a spotfest than a match but that’s all fine and good. If these are on the show, this is where they belong without question. Crazy hits the triple moonsaults which are kind of cool I think.

Wow Crazy is better than I remember him being. This has been all him at this point in case you were wondering and there goes his head from a kick so there we are. I could watch Tajiri kick people all day. Crazy misses a springboard and the crowd seems to think he screwed up. Crazy goes completely away from the match idea and hits a low blow. They set up a second Batista Bomb but they botch the heck out of it so I think Tajiri countered it. After another counter, Crazy gets the pin on a rollup.

Rating: B. Not bad, but way behind their other match. This was certainly entertaining, but at the same time it was miles behind what they did last month. Far more of a spotfest than anything else but at the same time that’s what an opener should do: it got the crowd into it so this was a success.

Van Dam, Sabu and Van Dam say they’ll beat Taz. Van Dam should be world champion, period. You can see the masking tape over the Taz name plate on the FTW belt. That’s awesome.

We see some highlights of the previous match but it’s interrupted by some guy that looks like Sean Waltman from the mid 90s yelling. HOLY CRAP THAT’S STEVE CORINO????? He looks NOTHING like he does now. I mean NOTHING. I honestly didn’t recognize him and that hardly ever happens. He yells out an open challenge and the fans want Sid. We get Balls and Axl instead.

Balls Mahoney vs. Steve Corino

I really can’t get over how different he looks. I’m in awe. Hearing Corino called young is rather amusing. This is all Balls to start. Steve is the heel here. How many times did Rotten actually wrestle? All I remember him doing is screaming and yelling a lot. Mahoney hits a decent frog splash if nothing else.

The fans want to see a chair shot. I’m amazed at how Corino is more or less a jobber here. He always had a sweet superkick. He refuses to use the chair and gets booed. Amazing isn’t it? My mouth is hanging open from that chair shot. He might get up by 2001. Balls wins with ease. Fans were way into it at least.

Rating: D. Seriously, Mahoney just beat Corino. Even as a jobber, that’s not right ever. This was like 4 minutes long so how good can they make it? Steve was a total jobber if nothing else anyway. Total filler of 7 minutes counting intros here.

We recap the Dudleys vs. the Gangstas which wound up with Mustapha turning on New Jack to set up their match tonight.

Little Guido vs. Antifaz del Norte

No one knows who the other guy is. Big Sal is the only one with Guido tonight. There’s a really long stall to start. I’m sure there’s an epic story behind this and it’s not just a randomly thrown together match at all. His name means Mask of the North or North Mask in case you were curious for no apparent reason. The fans are shall we say restless although the Mask guy isn’t bad. The fans want Tracy Smothers.

We get a big chop battle that leads nowhere. Russian legsweep from the middle rope and you can make your own ethnical jokes. The fans chant boring and I mean they chant it LOUDLY. Sal likes to curse a lot. He ENDS the masked guy with a powerslam through the table at ringside. A Sicilian (Walls of Jericho) Crab ends it and we get the bad FBI music. Smothers and Rich come out and beat up Guido until Sal chases them off.

Rating: D-. And that’s all on the masked guy. I have no idea who he was and I have no idea where he went after this. He was pretty good though which makes up a bit for Guido being completely uninteresting. Why was this on PPV again?

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

Ok let’s see if this lives up to the hype still. Van Dam gets an epic pop. Still gets nowhere near the main event or the world title. I’m stunned. Oh and he and Sabu are the tag champions again. Paul, take a good look at RVD. He’s the reason you’re out of business. The fact that you simply never made him the main guy killed your company.

Well among other things but that could have gotten you a lot of cash at the end. Lynn is a guy that the more I see the more I like. Apparently Van Dam is supposed to win in a walk. ECW needs to stop the close-ups. They do a swank sequence of can you top this which is working for me. Lynn took his freaking head off with a clothesline there. Van Dam likes to stall. A lot.

In a funny spot Lynn drops a leg on the back of his neck when he does that split move. Perfect timing on it too so it looked great. Lynn shows off his leaping too and hits a spinning crossbody to the floor. The psychology here is that Lynn is doing basic stuff to counter Van Dam’s high stuff. Apparently one of the fans loves a girl named Melissa.

We’re in the crowd now with a bunch of jumps and flips from Van Dam. Entertaining if nothing else. Van Dam tells D-Von Alfonso to get the table. Oh wait it’s a chair. That’s better. I will never be able to avoid cringing at the surfboard. That’s just insane. Not big on the chair stuff here but with Van Dam they never booked him right anyway so it works.

SWEET counter as Lynn hits a counter to something into a springboard into a powerbomb onto a chair. Better than it sounds. Van Dam takes a reverse DDT onto the chair for two. The chair is laying on the mat for the most part which is annoying but bearable I guess. Apparently Lynn is the new F’ING show. Fonzie makes the save for Van Dam as Lynn was up top with the chair.

And Lynn goes off the top and through a table against his own wishes. Lynn has been down a LONG time. Jerry stops the attack with a chair to stop the split legged moonsault. I love pinfall reversal sequences and apparently the crowd does too. The speed here is great. Van Dam takes a tornado DDT from the apron onto the table. Note that it wasn’t through it. That was scary looking.

Hey we’re back in the ring again. Lynn hits a nice jumping DDT for two…and we get a bell? The referee tries to hand him the belt as he’s making a decision. Uh, WHAT? Lynn wants five more minutes. And for once that’s what we’re going to get. That decision has boggled my mind. See my mind? It’s boggled now.

Who in the world would do that? RVD hits the Van Daminator and the Five Star to take over from nowhere and get the pin. There might have been two more minutes after Overtime started, making me wonder WHAT THE FREAKING POINT TO IT WAS. They shake hands after the match which is always cool.

Rating: B. I said to X in the Board Room that I didn’t know if this was good or not but it was certainly entertaining and I think that holds up actually. It’s certainly entertaining, but the referee making the decision thing was just WEIRD. I mean have you ever heard of that before? Still though, this was full of sweet spots and while there was little flow to it, the oh crap factor makes up for that so I’ll take it.

Ah apparently the main event WILL NOT have a pre determined winner. Got it.

We kind of recap Taz vs. Sabu. Why is that so hard for them to get right?

Jasmine St. Claire, an adult actress, says she’s the new queen of wrestling. Cue Francine. This was earlier in the night. And the point of this was…?

Mustapha Saed vs. New Jack

Oh dear. Oh dear indeed. Mustapha paid off the Dudleys to beat some guys up, including new Jack. Can someone shoot that stupid song? I beg of you. Oh dear. It’s a bunch of weapons shots. The main ones are a keyboard and a plastic lawnmower a 2 year old would like. New Jack swings a guitar that breaks before it hits Mustapha.

Oh dear. We hit the crowd and you can feel the balcony dive coming. Mustapha is taped to the table and there goes New Jack. Yep there he goes. Nope it doesn’t mean much as he does it every time. And after being walked back to the ring that’s enough for the pin.

Rating: N/A. Dude, New Jack, you can’t wrestle. Let it go. This wasn’t wrestling so I can’t grade it.

And here are the Dudleys. They beat up New Jack until a bunch of guys come out to save him. Joel does his intro and it’s pretty weak. Bubba starts talking, still as a country hick. They don’t have a match or anything as they’re just here talking. It’s open challenge time.

Spike Dudley/Nova vs. Dudley Boys

And of course within a minute we have Spike thrown into the crowd and he’s surfed around. His leg hit the rail on the fall though so the sound was really bad. Nova looks like Hurricane in blue and black here. He gets a Bubba Bomb from the middle rope and 3D. Ok let’s move on. Ring announcer gets 3D. DANG Spike has been surfed around for a long time.

Bubba talks again and says there’s no one left. Something tells me that a certain monster named Sid will be here soon as he was featured in the opening video and he happens to be an unstoppable monster. Bubba offers to fight the crowd. Judge Jeff Jones comes down with a stretcher and yep there’s Sid. Sid blowing bubbles while Bubba yells at him is funny. SID SELLS SOMETHING! I’m in SHOCK.

Fans are WAY into Sid who hits a double chokeslam. Sid destroys them and…here’s Spike again. Sid beats up D-Von on the ramp and Spike hits the Acid Drop…for the pin. Sure. Why not? Spike gets powerbombed too. Sid would be gone in a few months for WCW. And there’s another powerbomb through a table conveniently placed on the floor.

Rating: D-. The fans popped HUGE for Sid but other than that this was just a total mess. The idea that the match was still going on all that time is nothing short of idiotic and it shows very well why Heyman’s booking was so crazy at times. This should have been Sid comes out and beats people up. Spike and Nova simply weren’t needed.

We recap Shane leaving ECW which hasn’t actually happened yet but should have happened about 6 months before this. The fans of course don’t want the biggest heel in company history to go. The Impact Players argue over who gets to be the next Franchise. Shane says Dreamer gets to carry on the legacy of Shane. There are too many jokes there than I have time to type. The Impact Players beat up Shane and Francine to a ballad for some reason and Dreamer is beaten up too.

Tommy Dreamer/Shane Douglas vs. Impact Players

This is more or less Shane’s final big deal in ECW. Dawn Marie is pretending to be Beaulah at this point for no apparent reason. Oh Storm is Dreamer and Justin is Douglas. I get it now. Francine’s looks were WAY underrated. Shane of course went from being the top heel for like ever to being loved because he wanted to retire which is a wrestling tradition. Of course he was in WCW in like 2 months.

Shane in long tights is just weird looking. This new ring announcer kind of sucks. Dawn Marie dressed like Beulah: WIN. Great heat on Storm here. And we’ve already got double teaming. Something tells me this is going to get insane soon. Justin won’t come in to fight Shane. Ok never mind yes he will. Shane hits a nice rolling suplex set. Always loved that kind of thing. Dreamer hooks the absolute worst abdominal stretch I have ever seen. I mean it looks AWFUL.

The heels are dominating as Dawn apparently has herpes. Justin isn’t that good, period. Storm does one of the worst spot calls this side of Shawn Michaels. We get a TOTALLY random Ric Flair sucks chant. Credible screams for mercy which is rather amusing. This isn’t quite a fully fledged disaster but it’s reaching the outer limits of Disasteria.

This is more or less heel dominance for the most part, which tells me that the faces will get the win in the end. It’s weird but whenever the faces take over the crowd dies a bit, even though they’re all over the heels. Most odd indeed. They’re setting up for the big hot tag to Shane by having Dreamer get the heck beaten out of him.

Shane comes in and offers to reform the Triple Threat and then screws over the Players by hitting a double clothesline. Ok that was pointless but whatever. Dawn hits a low blow on Shane while Jazz distracts the referee. You know, because the referee wouldn’t hear the screaming she was doing. Cat fight ensues of course. This is still pure heel domination.

And here’s Francine with a ladder. Sure why not? Dreamer hits the DDT on Justin into Lance’s balls. Justin kicks out of the belly to belly. Oh I’m so shocked. Maybe he managed to do that because IT’S JUST A FREAKING SUPLEX! Francine stops a cane shot and kicks Justin in the head to set up the Pittsburgh Plunge for the pin.

Replay shows Justin looking over his shoulder to make sure she was there for the spot. Post match Cyrus comes out and causes the Impact Players to beat up the faces. He saves Francine though.

Rating: C-. Not bad but whatever I guess. This was all about Shane getting one last thing and he did so good for them. Yeah the match sucked but it had great heat and it got the job done so I’ll give it credit.

We look at the TV Title match again as we’re rapidly running out of time. The referee says this isn’t Holyfield-Lewis fight and there will be a clean winner. He’s referring to Evander Holyfield vs. Lennox Lewis. They had a long fight and Lewis more or less dominated but the fight was declared a draw. Apparently the referee was ready to give Lynn the belt because he was the clear winner.

Even the interviewer more or less says that’s freaking stupid. Van Dam walks in and says there will be a rematch at the next PPV. Sure why not. So Lynn had the title won and was told he had the title but wanted five more minutes and got pinned clean. Sure why not?

ECW World Title/FTW Title: Sabu vs. Taz

This is title for title for no apparent reason. We see a clip of how Taz broke Sabu’s jaw. Apparently that same clothesline tore tendons in Taz’s arm. That’s quite an arm strike. Taz gets a nice pop. Why do they keep saying that this was the main event of Barely Legal? It wasn’t as far as I remember. Also, from ECW, I still have never heard WHY THEY HATE EACH OTHER.

Would that be so hard to freaking tell me? Yes I know why from other research, but you would think they could TELL ME THAT OR SOMETHING. It’s so strange thinking that Taz is such an imbecile on commentary now. Taz talks before the match again and says we should make it falls count anywhere and then says his catchphrase because we have to have that right.

We hear Sabu talk which is something you rarely hear if ever. I think other than on DVDs I’ve heard it once? They actually start with a wrestling sequence if you can believe that. We hit about our 20th F Bomb tonight. Sure why not. Sick boot to the head of Sabu. Here’s your required brawling for the main event as we hit the crowd. The beauty of crowd brawling for them at least is they get to go out and do very little at all but still make it look like they’re doing a lot.

Ok not really but you would think otherwise. We’re on the ramp now and that gets us nowhere. This is just spot after spot with little flow or thought to them at all. Hey we’re in the ring! What do you know about that? It’s table time of course and Sabu goes through it. Taz calls out Hogan and Flair. That’s just amusing. This is ALL Taz.

Fonzie tries to throw in the towel but Sabu says no. This is just Sabu getting beaten up, so therefore it’s becoming totally awesome! He makes a short comeback and Taz gets his foot on the ropes. So what if it’s FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE? Even the fans yell at that. And there’s the Tazmission and Sabu is out. Handshake ends the show.

Rating: D. Yeah this was pretty weak. It was just one guy beating the heck out of the other with one guy refusing to quit the entire time, then a short comeback and the ending is a guy that put on a stunt show not actually giving up because he’s out cold. Even after all that, I hope that Sabu and Taz Have A Nice Day If You Smell What I’m Cooking.

Overall Rating: D. This is more or less a one match show as Lynn and Van Dam had a good match but other than that, this felt thrown together and like it was about 1/3 filler. Not a lot made sense and they even screwed up the one good match they had with a stupid ending. I think the problem here is that you have no one legit to challenge Taz other than Van Dam and Heyman simply would not give him the push.

Awesome and Tanaka were both gone and Sid was too big of a deal to put against Taz I guess, so we get matches that aren’t that interesting like this which is ok but we’ve seen it SO many times that it’s just boring. The show is watchable I suppose, but I wanted it to end about an hour and a half before it did. If this was cut to about 2 hours instead of three, it’s FAR better. Check out the TV Title match if you want but it’s not required viewing.

First ECW on TNN
Date: August 27, 1999
Commentator: Joey Styles

From the title I think you get the idea here. This show is weird as it’s a lot like the old WWF TV shows as it’s a collection of previously aired matches thrown together here. The first show they taped was awful so they turned it into this. The main thing is Lynn vs. Van Dam from Hardcore Heaven 99 which I’ll re-review and see how it matches up with the original rating I gave it, which is something I don’t think I’ve done before. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of the Dudleys (who would leave for WWF in like a week) powerbombing someone through a flaming table as Joey says this isn’t WCW or WWF but ECW.

Cue theme song. The main focus is Tazz who would leave in like 2-3 months and everyone knew that was going to happen.

Joey lists off a bunch of people to have held the TV Title but says RVD might be better than all of them.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

I think this is new commentary here but I’m not sure. This is really just a way to introduce Van Dam and give us what they know is an exciting match. You can’t hear a word the ring announcer is saying. They start with a nice sequence where neither can get any real advantage but the fans love it. We actually get highlights of both guys in the middle of the match. I get that you want to showcase two of your top guys but dude, do it when there’s not a match on.

Van Dam gets knocked to the floor and Lynn takes over. Lynn gets a top rope bulldog for two. RVD is bleeding from…..something. I think at this point we go to a commercial as we get an ad for Anarchy Rulz. Joey suggests the Warrior could be coming to ECW. Oh dear. Yeah the commentary here is new. Lynn is bleeding too now after botching a fall to the floor and hitting his foot on the ropes. The replay has a rap song with it. Really?

Lynn gets a sunset powerbomb for two. What would an ECW match be without tables? Van Dam’s eye is messed up and black as coal. Van Daminator in the stands as this match is kind of hard to follow. Another commercial doesn’t help as they don’t stop the match for it, which is either a good idea or a bad idea and I’m not sure which. Lynn gets another sunset powerbomb through the table on the floor.

CUE THE RAP SONG REPLAY! After a clip or a commercial, Fonzie takes a chair pelted at his head. Lynn goes for a top rope belly to belly but he just falls off. You know the chant we get from that. Cradle Piledriver is blocked and both guys are down. Split Legged Moonsault hits Lynn. PAY ATTENTION MORRISON. THAT IS HOW YOU DO THE FREAKING MOVE. And there’s the Five Star out of more or less nowhere but Lynn rolls through for two. Van Daminator and a HUGE Five Star ends it.

Rating: B-. The clipping hurts this a lot. It makes this look like far less of an ultra competitive match and more like RVD just breaking a sweat. It’s still good but at the same time it really makes Lynn look weak. At the same time though this was about RVD and that worked very well. This was still good but a different kind of good. I gave the PPV version a B as I still find these matches to be overrated by most ECW fans.

We plug Rollerjam (which as a kid I thought was a cool show. The women were hot if nothing else) and then talk about the ECW World Title, listing off guys that didn’t win it but tried to, such as Konnan, Benoit, Austin and Foley. I’m not entirely sold on talking about guys that USED to be here, but you could look at it like this: We had these guys before they were superstars. Imagine what kind of buried treasures we have here now. That makes sense.

Shane threw down the NWA Title, which meant nothing to most fans watching this show but whatever. That was 5 years before the debut of the TV show. Didn’t know that.

ECW World Title: Taz vs. Rhyno

This is from Hardcore TV or a house show. Rhyno hits a powerbomb 3 seconds in and Taz just pops up. Rhyno means nothing at this point which you can probably guess. Well we’re in Chicago if nothing else. Taz is massacring him here with Rhyno looking like a  jobber. He’s hit two punches to the ribs and a no sold powerbomb. Tazz sets up a table and Rhyno hits new levels of offense with THREE punches to the ribs. Suplex through the table sets up the Tazmission. Total squash if there ever has been one.

Rating: N/A. This was DOMINANCE which is the idea I guess, but Rhyno looks like a freaking joke here. The problem is that these matches are just random defenses with no meaning to them. We keep hearing about Steve Corino and how he’s Taz’s archenemy, but we never even see him.

Video on Sabu who is apparently awesome. No match or anything but just highlights.

Ad for Anarchy Rulz again.

Spike Dudley vs. Big Sal

Low blow and Acid Drop end it. Literally that’s the whole thing. Who is Spike? Who is Sal? “Spike has done it again!” What does he do? Apparently that’s not important. Ah ok they call him the Giant Killer.

The Impact Players introduce themselves and we have no idea if they mean anything or not. Cyrus pops up for no apparent reason as Jason makes gay jokes about Joey. We see clips of the Impact Players beating people up which helps a bit as we know they’re dominant.

House show ads.

We get a BUNCH of clips of guys and a brief description (as in their nickname) of them. It’s set to a Kid Rock song so what do you expect here?

Taz talks about how TNN and ECW are together now and how cool that is I guess. We get clips of famous people he’s made tap out. He talks for like three minutes and that ends this mess.

Overall Rating: D. This was a total mess. Considering this is the first show, this was just awful as you learn nothing about the guys other than Taz being a tough guy and RVD is awesome. Other than that though you get nothing at all here though and other than a single good match to start, this gave us nothing. We have no idea about any feuds or angles or anything like that as it was just a few squashes and one big match from months earlier. This just didn’t work as Heyman clearly didn’t know what he was doing, which became a theme here. Bad show and just a car wreck of an hour.