Impact Wrestling – April 12, 2019: The One Two Combination Of Impact Troubles

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 12, 2019
Location: St. Clair’s College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re about two weeks away from Rebellion and you can see most of the card from here. That’s a good sign as you should be able to know what you’re getting this close to the pay per view and it’s looking pretty solid on paper. The problem is they rarely get beyond solid and it would be nice to move forward for a change. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Moose vs. Zachary Wentz

Wentz goes for a wristlock to start and Moose throws him around for the easy escape. A lot bridge puts Moose on the floor for an apron superkick and Wentz is actually able to muscle him back in. That’s not a good idea as it’s a running corner dropkick to put him down again and Moose sends Wentz flying. The referee does at least yell at Moose before he chokes away on the ropes a bit more.

The other Rascalz can only watch as it’s an apron bomb to knock Wentz even sillier. Moose throws him back in but stops to pose, allowing Wentz to hit a dive. Back in and some running knees in the corner rock Moose, setting up a springboard crossbody for two. A high crossbody (minus the springboard) is countered into a gorilla press toss over the top onto the other Rascalz. The spear finishes Wentz at 8:36.

Rating: C. This mini feud has been far more entertaining than it should be, though I’m not sure where it goes. Does Moose just beat all three of them and then move on to something else? That’s not the best usage of a rather talented team, though maybe they can come up with something else before Moose runs through them all.

Rob Van Dam is back full time.

Rob is glad to be back and hopes his magnetic waist still has it.

Madison Rayne isn’t letting her loss to Jordynne Grace get to her because the goal is the Knockouts Title. Tessa Blanchard comes in to say that the glory days are over. Madison brings up beating Tessa twice and is fine with doing it a third time.

Rosemary vs. Su Yung

Yung has her usual army of bridesmaids with her. Rosemary charges straight at her and hammers away as she continues to blame Su for the loss of Allie. The upside down triangle choke over the ropes has Yung in more trouble but she gets out and starts in on the knee. A dragon screw legwhip sends Rosemary down and it’s time to bring out the bloody glove.

That takes too long though and a reverse DDT puts both of them down. A German suplex doesn’t work on Yung so Rosemary spears her, drawing the bridesmaids up to the apron. Cue Kiera Hogan to go after them but Rosemary doesn’t want to hear it. The Bridesmaids jump her for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: D+. This was more storyline based than anything else and that’s ok for the most part. It’s interesting that Yung is now being pushed at a stronger level than where she was when Allie was in her corner. The story can continue, though you could argue that it should have ended a long time ago.

Post match Hogan is forced to watch as Rosemary gets beaten down. Hogan gets a Panic Switch of her own.

Video on United We Stand. Tommy Dreamer thinks it feels like ECW. I know it’s not the same thing, but Impact surpassed the initial success of ECW a long time ago. That’s not the greatest compliment in the world. The wrestlers are fired up over making it such a success. I’d have to see a failure.

Ace Austin isn’t happy with Aiden Prince costing him the six way scramble last week and wants revenge.

GWN Flashback of the Week: Taylor Wilde vs. Angelina Love, I believe from No Surrender 2008.

Killer Kross talks to Willie Mack about….jazz music? Speaking of jazz, Rich Swann likes jazz and is playing Swann for a fool. Wouldn’t be shocking actually.

The Deaners are still coming.

North vs. Sheldon Jean/El Reverso

That would be Josh Alexander/Ethan Page. Alexander and Reverso start things off and it’s quickly off to Jean, who gets his arm cranked. Reverso comes back in and gets caught in an assisted spinning sitout DDT from Page. A spinning backbreaker keeps Reverso in trouble and a powerbomb backbreaker from Alexander makes it even worse. Reverso gets over for the tag to Sheldon, who comes in with a springboard clothesline. Alexander cuts him off at the knees though and it’s a series of strikes to Reverso’s head, setting up a reverse AA into a whip spinebuster for the pin at 5:25.

Rating: D+. The North (not a good name) looked nice enough together and some of their double teaming was rather impressive. That being said, they shouldn’t give up so much offense in their debut, let alone to two unknowns. I mean, his name is El Reverso. How much should he be getting in?

Gail Kim doesn’t want to hear Tessa talk.

The North is here to stay.

Madison Rayne vs. Tessa Blanchard

Gail is on commentary. Madison doesn’t like Tessa shoving her in the face to start so she gets in a kick to the ribs. A rope walk hurricanrana sends Tessa outside for a few seconds but she’s right back in for some dropkicks to the back. Tessa’s suplex makes it even worse and we hit the chinlock….as we look at Gail for the fourth time in less than three minutes. Madison gets caught in the corner for a Codebreaker and we take a break.

Back with Madison hitting some forearms and a dropkick as we look at Gail AGAIN. Tessa’s spinning full nelson faceplant gets two and a double slingshot suplex is good for the same. The frustration sets in as we look at Gail for the eighth time in about ten minutes. Tessa grabs a chair but Gail takes it away, allowing Madison to get a rollup pin at 13:57.

Rating: C. I knew the Gail Kim love would be strong and that’s what we got here with the ridiculous amount of cutting over to her. The story is good and has been well built up, but I’m scared that they’re going to give Gail the win instead of going with the move that makes sense. Madison was her usual self here, which is exactly the kind of thing they brought her back in to do.

Post match Tessa yells at commentary.

Eddie Edwards and Eli Drake ask the Lucha Bros for a Tag Team Title shot but LAX comes in for the double beatdown.

The Deaners are still coming.

Johnny Impact says someone as dumb as Brian Cage only comes around once every thousand years. Now he has a fan club in Jordynne Grace that he can do food prep with. Taya Valkyrie implies that Grace and Cage are sleeping together to get under Melissa Santos’ skin.

OVE calls Rich Swann a walking dumpster fire. Swann stabbed them in the back and at Rebellion, they’re taking the X-Division Title.

Tessa promises to make it personal with Gail.

Rob Van Dam is back soon.

Fallah Bahh can’t find KM so he goes into the women’s dressing room and finds Scarlett Bordeaux. She doesn’t mind and agrees to team with him next week.

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie vs. Jordynne Grace/Brian Cage

Taya is willing to start with Cage but she gets run over by Grace to start instead. They trade whips into the corner with Grace hitting a Cannonball, sending Taya over for a tag. Johnny is good though and bails to the floor to avoid having to face Cage. We take a break and come back with Johnny backing off from Cage, who shrugs off a superkick.

The fall away slam sends Johnny down but the springboard corkscrew crossbody staggers Cage just a bit. One heck of a clothesline blasts Impact and a backdrop gets way more height than it should be able to. Johnny finally slides between the legs and dives over to Taya. A trip to Grace lets Taya take over with a Jeff Hardy legdrop between the legs for two. Taya cranks on the arm and a running hip attack keeps Grace in trouble. That just means a sitout powerbomb out of the corner to plant Taya and a roll into the corner allows the tag to Cage.

House is cleaned with an enziguri in the corner and a release German suplex back out of it rocks Johnny all over again. The flipping neckbreaker puts Cage down for two and there’s the Flying Chuck. Again though, Cage shrugs it off and blasts Johnny with the discus lariat. Grace comes in with a German suplex and hits a running dive onto Impact. Cage adds a flipping version to take him out again…but the referee chop blocks Cage so Impact can knee him in the head for the pin at 14:00.

Rating: D+. It’s like they’ve run out of good ideas to keep this feud going so they’re going to the most basic booking tropes they can think of. The crooked referee isn’t one of my favorite stories and while it’s better than watching them have the same matches over and over, this feud needed to end about two months ago and it’s just going on and on.

Post match Cage gets beaten down so Impact and Taya can pose with the referee. Johnny kisses Taya to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Not their best show here as they’ve spent way too long on a lot of these stories and need something fresh. Impact has always had issues with making their main event stories seem epic and knowing when to end a feud, both of which are on full display here. It’s not a bad show by any stretch but it didn’t make me want to see Rebellion, which I’m often forgetting about in general. Just get to something fresh and make it more interesting.

Results

Moose b. Zachary Wentz – Spear

Rosemary b. Su Yung via DQ when the Undead Bridesmaids interfered

The North b. Sheldon Gene/El Reverso – Assisted whip spinebuster to Reverso

Madison Rayne b. Tessa Blanchard – Rollup

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie b. Brian Cage/Jordynne Grace – Knee to Cage’s head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – April 5, 2019: Their New Reality

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 5, 2019
Location: St. Clair’s College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

So in the middle of all the insanity that is Wrestlemania weekend, we have this show in pursuit of anyone remembering that it’s actually taking place. That’s kind of a shame actually as things are pretty decent at the moment with Johnny Impact’s overdue heel turn already paying dividends. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap serves its lone function.

Opening sequence.

Petey Williams vs. Trey Miguel vs. Idris Abraham vs. Jake Crist vs. Aiden Prince vs. Ace Austin

Great. Williams is back. One fall to a finish so everything is insane to start with Austin being the last man standing, earning him a quadruple superkick until it’s Austin vs. Abraham alone in the ring. Williams replaces Abraham in a hurry with Petey grabbing a German suplex for two. Now it’s Prince taking Williams’ place and suplexing Austin for two. Abraham and his huge afro are back in with Trey spinning away from him. Crist is back in with a Death Valley Driver but Abraham drops him with a Blue Thunder Bomb.

Not to be outdone, Austin drops a frog splash for two on Abraham and drops Miguel with a swinging neckbreaker. Williams’ swinging Russian legsweep gets two on Miguel and the Sharpshooter goes on. That’s broken up so it’s O Canada to Crist in the corner. Austin puts Prince over Crist in the corner and it’s the Tower of Doom to bring everyone down. The Canadian Destroyer gives Petey two on Austin and it’s Prince flip diving onto Austin and Abraham on the floor. Back in and Williams hits a super Canadian Destroyer to finish Crist at 8:35.

Rating: C+. So you know every match with all of these people thrown into a match with everyone hitting their spots and moving on? This was the most recent one of them that I’ve seen. There’s nothing to separate them from the rest of their kind and Petey Williams is far from inspiring.

LAX and Konnan want to use Full Metal Mayhem to earn respect from the Lucha Bros.

Taya Valkyrie doesn’t care that she lost to Jordynne Grace last week. Madison Rayne comes in and says she wants a title match. Jordynne comes in and wants her rematch for the title but Taya makes a #1 contenders match for later tonight for the Rebellion title match.

Announcers’ preview.

OVE vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack

Sami Callihan/Madman Fulton for OVE. Swann, now clean shaven, goes straight after Callihan to start and flips over him into the dropkick. Mack comes in, shrugs off a cheap shot from Fulton, and hits a 619 to Callihan’s ribs. Fulton’s second interference works a bit better and it’s Sami scoring with a clothesline to send us to a break. Back with Fulton suplex slamming Swann for two but Mack comes right back with a spinebuster.

A standing moonsault gets two but Fulton breaks up the hot tag attempt. The neck crank goes on for a bit until the break allows the hot tag off to Swann. Everything breaks down and Fulton is hurricanranaed to the floor, leaving Callihan to take a Lethal Injection. The Phoenix Splash misses and everyone but Mack heads outside, meaning it’s a big flip dive onto all three. Back in and Mack breaks up a Cactus Piledriver but gets slammed down by Fulton. The Cactus Piledriver finishes Swann at 14:01.

Rating: C+. This was mainly about making Fulton look like a monster and….they only kind of did that. Granted when you’re as big as Fulton, the monster thing is already included so it’s not the biggest deal in the world. This story has been going on for a long time now and I’d assume that Callihan gets the title soon. Like at Rebellion maybe.

Post match the beatdown is on until Tommy Dreamer makes the save with a chair.

Johnny Impact gets annoyed at being asked questions about Brian Cage and threatens to John Stossel Menendez. Killer Kross comes up and puts his arm around Menendez, saying he should get a title shot someday. Johnny looks worried.

Moose invades the Rascalz’ room and brings a female friend, with an invitation to bring a bunch of animals in as well.

GWN Classic Moment of the Week: Full Metal Mayhem at Bound For Glory 2011.

Rosemary goes to Allie’s grave and rants about Kiera Hogan and James Mitchell, plus her father Kevin Sullivan, all of whom are to blame. Then she disappears.

Jordynne Grace vs. Madison Rayne

The winner gets the Knockouts Title shot t at Rebellion. Grace throws her down with ease to start and then does it again even harder. Rayne’s middle rope crossbody bounces off of her so a rollup works a little better. An enziguri gives Rayne two but Grace Pounces her right back down.

Some knees to the back set up a not quite giant swing as Rayne’s back is in trouble. A backbreaker into a side slam keep Rayne down but the Vader Bomb misses. Rayne gets two off a high crossbody and she gets in a rear naked choke. That’s broken up as well and a torture rack into a spinning powerbomb gives Grace two. Grace has had it and the Grace Driver finishes Rayne at 8:48.

Rating: C. This is why Rayne was brought back in. She’s not the best in the world, but you’re going to get a good match from her and everything she does looks fine. Couple that with a resume and a pretty good promo and it’s easy to see the value in her. Put her in there with the newer talent and see what she can do for them.

Post match here’s Taya for a fight with Grace but Johnny comes out for a distract so Taya can beat her down. Johnny goes up for the Countdown To Impact but Cage makes the save.

Josh Alexander is coming and is presented like a psychopathic killer in amateur wrestling gear.

Josh recruits Ethan Page as his partner.

Rohit Raju vs. Fallah Bahh

Raju has both Singhs with him but there’s no KM. Bahh jumps over an early legsweep attempt and hits the spinning belly to belly. The charge hits post but Bahh is fine with a Samoan drop. There’s a running crossbody to set up the Banzai Drop but Singh knocks Bahh down, giving Raju the pin with feet on the ropes at 2:59.

Post match here’s Scarlett Bordeaux to slap Raju and it’s a double splash in the corner. Scarlett’s running hip attack (after pulling the dress up) lets her celebrate with Bahh.

The Deaners, a couple of rednecks, get Impact contracts.

Swann vs. Callihan for the X-Division Title is set for Rebellion.

Video on Gail Kim’s Hall of Fame career and the current feud with Tessa Blanchard.

Tessa Blanchard says Gail was great in the era of bra and panties match. Now people like Gail and Madison are trying to relive their glory days. This is Tessa’s era and in this era, Gail isn’t a legend.

Eli Drake/Eddie Edwards vs. LAX

Before the match, Konnan gets in an argument with Drake and punches him, meaning it’s an early ejection. The fight is on and we do that really annoying thing of taking a break less than twenty seconds in. Back with Santana punching Eddie until a blind tag lets Drake come in and take over. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Ortiz and it’s back to Eddie for a headbutt, which might hurt him more given the thickness of that hair. Drake gets two off a neckbreaker but Ortiz is right back with a middle rope dropkick for a breather.

It’s back to Santana to pick up the pace as everything breaks down. A tiger driver gives Eddie two on Santana with Ortiz making the save. That means a rolling cutter into a Codebreaker into a superkick into the double belly to back faceplant for two on Eddie with Drake making the save. The Street Sweeper is loaded up but here are the Lucha Bros for a distraction. That’s enough for Drake to get in a shot with Kenny, setting up the Boston Knee Party to finish Ortiz at 10:55.

Rating: B-. Not bad here and giving us a new main event team is a good thing. Drake and Eddie have more than enough of a combined resume to hang with either team and giving them this win is the right move. They could challenge the winners of Full Metal Mayhem for the titles…or at least they could if Impact hadn’t decided to release Drake for not liking one of their not great ideas.

Post match the Lucha Bros runs in and beat down LAX, with Santana being powerbombed through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Nothing was bad on here, though nothing was must see either. That’s not a bad place to be for a show like this with very little importance. Rebellion is looking like any Impact pay per view: a solid card up and down but nothing that I’m overly excited to see. I’ll take a good but not great card over nothing shows though so they’ve moved to a nice new reality.

Results

Petey Williams b. Trey Miguel, Idris Abraham, Jake Crist, Aiden Prince and Ace Austin – Super Canadian Destroyer to Crist

OVE b. Rich Swann/Willie Mack – Cactus Piledriver to Swann

Jordynne Grace b. Madison Rayne – Grace Driver

Fallah Bahh b. Rohit Raju – Rollup with feet on the ropes

Eddie Edwards/Eli Drake b. LAX – Boston Knee Party to Ortiz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Ring of Honor TV – March 20, 2019: In Which Long British Names Don’t Make Up For A Boring Show

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor

Ring of Honor
Date: March 20, 2019
Location: RP Funding Center, Lakeland, Florida
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana

It’s time for things to get a little weird as we have the post-pay per view show taped before the pay per view, meaning we won’t be getting any kind of fallout. In other words, it’s going to be all about the wrestling and I’m not sure what that’s going to include. Hopefully they have something good here so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you needed a recap.

Opening sequence.

Shinobi Shadow Squad vs. Silas Young/Briscoes

Oh this is going to hurt. Eli Isom and Jay start things off with Eli actually taking over for all of two seconds off a front facelock. A kick to the ribs cuts him down though and it’s off to Mark as the announcers tease spoiling a pay per view that hasn’t happened yet in a clever enough chat. Cheeseburger comes in and gets clotheslined as we take a break.

Back with Young clotheslining Burger as well before handing it off to Mark for a camel clutch. A missed charge lets Burger roll away a few times and the hot tag brings in Isom to pick up the pace. White Noise gets two on Jay but it’s the Death Valley Driver into the Froggy Bow….for two? The strong pushing of Isom continues and gets even stronger as his brainbuster hits Jay for another near fall. The Briscoes are done with him and come back in for a High/Low into the Jay Driller for the pin at 9:14.

Rating: C-. The more I see of Isom, the more I like him. There’s no reason for him to be anything more than a jobber but he’s trying hard and getting a bit of a push as a bonus. That’s nice to see and the fact that he’s an average sized person and not Cheeseburger sized makes it better. There was no way the villains were losing here, but at least there was a nice moment or two.

Rhett Titus is ready to win the NWA National Championship from Willie Mack next week.

Joe Keys and Brian Johnson are in the ring and don’t like the ugly women here in Florida.

Joe Keys/Brian Johnson vs. The Bouncers

Keys wants a posedown with Bruiser, who starts a BEER chant instead. A test of strength lets Bruiser hit him in the face and an atomic drop has Keys in the corner. Another chop sends him crawling over to Johnson and the jobbers get Bruiser into the corner for a double stomping. A double slam gets one on Bruiser, who gets over to the corner for the tag to Milonas without any trouble. Everything breaks down and Closing Time finishes Joe at 5:19.

Rating: D. This was a mostly squashy squash and that’s not the most thrilling thing in the world. I’m still not wild on the Bouncers but at least they’re now just there for the fun matches instead of anything important. This was a fun match for the crowd and while the jobbers got in a little too much offense, this could have been worse.

Madison Rayne doesn’t like Thunder Rosa disrespecting the Women of Honor.

Willie Mack is defending his National Title in all fifty states and next week Florida will be state #5.

Madison Rayne vs. Thunder Rosa

Sumie Sakai and Holidead are the seconds and Rayne charges to the ring and starts hammering away. A running forearm has Rosa in more trouble but Rayne and Sakai have to drop Holidead, allowing Rosa to take over. Back in and a kick to the back has Rayne in trouble and we take a break. We come back with Rayne hitting an enziguri but getting pulled down into a chinlock instead. That goes nowhere so Rayne is up with a spear, followed by another enziguri for two. Rosa hits a Gory Bomb for her own near fall but the reverse DDT gives Rayne the pin at 9:15.

Rating: D+. I still don’t care much for the women’s division, but at least they’re putting out some fresh talent. It’s still not the most thrilling in the world and Rayne is leaving, though at least there’s someone new out there. Rosa and Holidead should be pushed stronger, even if there’s nothing they can do because the Women’s Title scene is kind of a mess.

Coast to Coast is back next week.

Rocky Romero vs. Zack Sabre Jr.

Feeling out process to start with Sabre taking over on the arm as only he (and I mean that literally) can. Romero gets out with a dropkick to the floor but Sabre is back in to work on the leg. Make that the arm again as Sabre switches up in a hurry. Another dropkick gets Romero out of trouble again so this time Sabre goes after the neck as we take a break. Back with Sabre still toying with Romero and grabbing a crossarm choke.

Romero reverses into one of his own, followed by a tornado DDT for his first real offense. A springboard crossbody gives Romero two and there’s a kick to the face for a bonus. The forever lariats in the corner are countered into an STF but Sabre tries to make it a little too flashy and Romero makes it to the rope.

Sabre does his cocky kicks to the face so Romero takes him into the corner for a running knee to the ribs. A DDT gets two and Romero wins a slugout, followed by a running Sliced Bread for two more. The Sliced Bread in the corner is countered though and Sabre pulls him down into Hurrah! Another Year, Surely This One Will Be Better Than the Last; The Inexorable March of Progress Will Lead Us All To Happiness for the win at 13:44.

Rating: B-. Sabre is one of those once in a generation talents with some of the most incredible holds you’ll ever see. Romero….I don’t get it. I know he’s a much bigger deal in Japan but I don’t ever remember seeing him do anything better than average in the ring. Sabre’s insane stuff worked well here, but it was just a one off match for a special main event due to Sabre’s appearance.

Overall Rating: C-. These shows are the definition of hit or miss as you never know what you’re going to get. This was all about wrestling and it wasn’t very good for the most part, including some lame long form squashes and nothing that meant anything long term. It wasn’t terrible, but nothing that you needed to see whatsoever.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Ring Of Honor – August 15, 2018: They’re Making Me Rethink My Meat Preferences

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor Wrestling

Ring of Honor
Date: August 15, 2018
Location: EagleBank Arena, Fairfax, Virginia
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana

Your guess is as good as mine about what we might be getting this week. This show could be about wrestling, it could be about storytelling, or it could be about setting up some show for the Honor Club that doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things. The company is all over the place anymore, mainly due to not having a big show to build towards at the moment. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Bouncers vs. Briscoe Brothers

Non-title and the Bouncers are the Beer City Bruiser/Brian Milonas. Brian catches Mark’s crossbody and throws him hard with a belly to belly suplex. Jay comes in and gets rocked as well, with the Bouncers running the Brothers over without any trouble. Another hard shoulder knocks Jay down but the Brothers are back up with a double knockdown to the floor. That means a big flip dive from Jay, followed by a Whisper in the Wind from Mark as we take a break.

Back with Mark in more trouble and Milonas hitting his falling backsplash for two. A Trash Compactor of all things gets two on Mark with Jay having to make the save. Bruiser misses a Cannonball off the apron though and the Briscoes start the running corner clotheslines to put Milonas in trouble. A missed charge sends Bruiser into Milonas and an impressive Death Valley Driver gets two on Milonas. There’s a Blockbuster from the apron to Milonas, followed by the Froggy Bow for the pin at 9:27.

Rating: C+. I came into this one ready to not like it but the Bouncers were much better than I was expecting. They were in there working hard and doing a strong big man style, which is where they do have value. Granted it helped to be in there against a team as good as the Briscoes. I’m not sure how well it would have worked without them, but that’s how any better match works.

Post match the Briscoes say no one is taking these belts from them, especially So Cal Uncensored. Cue So Cal Uncensored to talk about how they need gold to stick around at the end of the year. The fight is on and referees are breaking it up as we take a break.

Karen Q. vs. Madison Rayne vs. Kelly Klein vs. Tenille Dashwood

The winner gets a future Women’s Title match and it’s one fall to a finish. All of them get an inset promo on their way to the ring. Believe it or not, they all want to be champion. Way to show the awesome levels of character depth from this division. Karen bails to the floor to start and Klein is proud of ducking an early double clothesline, only to be knocked to the floor.

Madison rolls Dashwood up for some near falls and lets her know how close that was. That’s enough to bring Karen back in but she gets suplexed upon arrival. Ian says there are supposed to be tags here, which is quite the news to Colt. Fair enough actually. Karen is back up with some running forearms to Madison and a snap suplex gets two. Dashwood puts on the Tarantula and takes Karen up top, only to have Kelly come back in with the Tower of Doom on everyone as we take a break.

Back with Dashwood taking over but Klein breaks up a near fall on Karen. Klein puts Karen up in a fireman’s carry and easily catches Madison in a fall away slam at the same time. No matter who does those things, they’re always impressive. A high crossbody gives Dashwood two on Klein and the Spotlight Kick connects, only to have Karen steal the near fall. Madison is back up though and the Rayne Check finishes Karen at 9:36.

Rating: D+. Just a big collection of stuff here without much of a flow or story being told. Madison as the next challenger is a good idea as you need someone with some name value to the more common wrestling fan (Madison isn’t a star but she’s better known than the Stardom women in America). I’m a bit surprised given that Madison is in the Mae Young Classic but this feels like a one off title shot anyway.

Here are Cody and Brandi Rhodes to take issue with the way his World Title rematches have gone. Yes he’s had two shots, but neither of them have been on on one. He needs someone to come out here who is all business so here’s NWA World Champion Nick Aldis, who Cody will be defending against at All In. Aldis talks about agreeing to their match at All In, but where’s the upside for him? What does Cody have to offer him? There’s no ROH World Title on the line so Aldis has nothing to gain, and that doesn’t sound like good business.

Cody offers up the ring of honor as collateral, which Aldis accepts and leaves. Hang on a second though, as Cody calls out Aldis for beating a 53 year old history teacher for that title while Cody was beating Kenny Omega and Kota Ibushi. Aldis gets back in and holds up the ring but here’s the Bullet Club to break things up. Nice segment here, especially for a match with the most obvious ending in the world.

Cheeseburger/Flip Gordon/Josh Woods vs. Bully Ray/Punishment Martinez/Shane Taylor

The Club is defending but hang on a second as here’s Bully Ray to post Flip and take him out. Post break, Bully and company say Cheeseburger and Woods need a partner so the fans chant for Colt Cabana. Cheeseburger says they’ll do it 3-2 so let’s hit the bell.

Cheeseburger/Josh Woods vs. Bully Ray/Punishment Martinez/Shane Taylor

Woods and Taylor start things off but Shane tags out to Martinez instead. That’s fine with Josh, who slugs away in the corner and a suplex has Martinez in trouble. Martinez stomps him out of the corner though and now Taylor is willing to come in so Woods suplexes him as well. Bully comes in and Cheeseburger comes in for the not very well done staredown. Cheeseburger slips out of a powerbomb and avoids a charge but Ray hides in the other corner.

The distraction lets Taylor crotch Cheeseburger and we take a break. Back with Ray talking a lot of trash as Cheeseburger tries to crawl to the corner. Shane knocks Woods off the apron with the running right hand and with Cheeseburger alone, Cabana runs in to be the third man and clean house. Cheeseburger tags himself in for a top rope double stomp and Cabana dives onto Ray. Taylor comes back in with Greetings From 216 and the pin at 7:41.

Rating: D. Good. I liked watching Cheeseburger’s head bounce off the mat and I was smiling when he got pinned. The character wasn’t creative in the first place and I’m sick of having the same stories pounded into my head for years now. It’s really annoying to watch him in there so often and even occasionally getting the better of people nearly 200lbs heavier than him. I can’t stand the guy and it was nice to see him get beaten up and pinned. Do it less often though, because it would mean Cheeseburger isn’t wrestling as often.

One positive: a thrown together team was fighting people they have issues with and not getting a random Six Man Tag Team Title match. I had just glanced at the graphic earlier and thought this was a title shot for Cheeseburger and company so the match we actually got was a bit of a relief.

Post match the beating is on but Flip Gordon comes back out with a chair for the save. Ray and company bail to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Like I said, this was another show where it was a total guessing game of what you were going to see. The wrestling wasn’t great to say the least (though the opener was good) and the main event angle is one of my least favorites in wrestling for the last year minimum. Building towards All In is better than nothing and gave the show its best segment. Other than that though, it feels like they were just throwing stuff out there and hoping for the best this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/


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Impact Wrestling – June 28, 2018: They’re Doing Things Right

IMG Credit: WWE

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 28, 2018
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

We’re getting closer and closer to Slammiversary and the card is really starting to take shape. One of the matches though appears to be Eddie Edwards vs. Tommy Dreamer, which means more of Dreamer talking about stuff that happened twenty years ago and how much he loves wrestling. That’s all well and good, if you ignore the fact that he’s done it for more than half of his career. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s big stories, including Konnan returning and being suspicious of King, Edwards going insane, Madison Rayne becoming #1 contender and OVE vs. Pentagon Jr./El Hijo Del Fantasma.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Rayne for a chat. She never intended to get back in the ring but now it’s all about creating moments. The biggest moment she could create would be to become the Knockouts Champion again. Sure she’s afraid of Su Yung, but she’s told her daughter to not be afraid of monsters. She’s coming to Slammiversary not as a mom, but as the five time Knockouts Champion.

This brings out Tessa Blanchard to say it’s not 2011 anymore. Tessa rants about being a third generation diamond of professional wrestling so Madison mocks her for telling us that over and over. A fight nearly breaks out but the lights flicker and Yung’s laughter is heard, allowing Tessa to drop her with a forearm. Tessa is awesome and while the Rayne story makes sense, I’m not really caring about what she’s saying.

Rich Swann vs. Trevor Lee

Swann is looking and acting exactly as he did in WWE. It’s a pose/dance off to start with Swann turning the test of strength into more dancing. There’s a flip over Lee as we have no contact in the first minute. A dropkick sends Lee outside though and more dancing takes us to a break. Back with Swann kicking him between the shoulders but getting dropped throat first onto the top rope.

Lee knocks Swann into the corner and chokes a bit as we’re told that it’s Blanchard vs. Rayne later tonight. Swann avoids a charge in the corner though and snaps off some dropkicks into a headscissors to the floor. That means the big flip dive to drop Lee again but his running double stomp gets two. Not that it matters as Swann hits his spinning kick to the head, followed by the reverse hurricanrana and the Phoenix splash for the pin at 12:40.

Rating: C+. If you liked Swann in WWE, you’ll like him here too as he’s doing the exact same thing. That’s a nice pickup as Swann has charisma and the fans love him, not to mention the division needs a top face star which Swann could certainly be. That being said, given how often the division needs some fresh blood, there might be far bigger problems at the moment.

We see OVE attacking Pentagon at a PCW show in Los Angeles. They take off his mask but Pentagon falls on his face, which Sami doesn’t care to expose to anyone.

Clip of the King of the Mountain match from Slammiversary 2005.

Katarina comes up to tell Grado and that she has a match next week. Grado is surprised but she reminds him that she’s a former two time Knockouts Champion. That’s a relief that we’re not supposed to think she’s someone brand new.

Desi Hit Squad vs. Z&E

This is the Hit Squad’s (Gursinder Singh/Rohit Raju) official debut though we’ve heard about them for months. They’re introduced by manager Gama Singh, a famous former wrestler. Everett tries to spin out of a wristlock but gets punched in the face for his efforts. A dropkick and then a double dropkick get two on Raju as we hear about Singh’s training methods. The Squad sends them both to the floor though and a dropkick gives Singh two back inside.

That’s about it for their control at the moment though as they’re both sent outside for a springboard corkscrew dive from Everett. A springboard spinwheel kick gets two on Raju but Singh knocks them both down. Raju knees Everett into a Sky High for another near fall so DJZ makes a save, apparently remembering that he’s in the match. A series of moonsaults gets two on Raju as Gama Singh is on the apron. The distraction lets Raju grab a rollup with tights to pin Everett at 6:53.

Rating: C. The Hit Squad was better than I expected but they didn’t exactly live up to the hype from hearing about them for so long. The ending didn’t do them any favors either as it was the same distraction for a save into a cheating pin that people have done for years now. They were fine, but certainly nothing inspiring or overly impressive.

Pentagon Jr. challenges Sami to mask vs. hair at Slammiversary.

Video on Moose, who grew up in a very bad neighborhood but he had an outlet in sports. He was drafted by the Atlanta Falcons but got traded around so much that he lost his love for football but his love for wrestling was growing. This is what he wanted to do more than anything else, even though his wife didn’t support it.

At a House of Hardcore event in Philadelphia, Eddie Edwards attacked Tommy Dreamer and busted him open. Eddie rubbed the blood onto his face and left, with Moose following him out and demanding an explanation. Eddie just said to leave him alone.

Konnan and King argue at the LAX Clubhouse with Konnan saying he’s playing him, no matter what King thinks. King leaves and Konnan says King is lying but LAX doesn’t buy it. Konnan promises proof.

Dezmond Xavier vs. Matt Sydal

Non-title. Xavier armdrags him to start but Sydal has a seat on the mat. A handshake is declined and Sydal takes a quick break on the floor. Back in and Xavier takes his head off with a clothesline and pounds away in the corner. Sydal starts in on the knee though and grabs a half crab, which he lets go in a hurry due to a sore hip. A dropkick to the leg cuts Xavier down again but he snapmares Sydal to the floor. The running flip dive drops Sydal one more time but the knee goes out to slow Xavier down. Back in and Sydal catches him on top, setting up that flip package cradle (name that already) for the pin on Xavier at 5:57.

Rating: C+. This had a lot more of a story than most X-Division matches and that’s a nice thing to see. Xavier continues to be one of the most underutilized talents on the roster. He’s young, looks great and can flip around with the best of them but instead he’s just putting over the champion with the third eye deal, which isn’t exactly lighting the division on fire. Such is life in Impact.

Post match Brian Cage comes out to go after Sydal but Jimmy Jacobs and Kongo Kong show up for a distraction, allowing Sydal to hit Cage with a belt shot. Kong adds a top rope splash.

Callihan says it’s on at Slammiversary and promises to humiliate Pentagon.

The announcers preview Slammiversary, which will include Johnny Impact vs. Fenix vs. Rich Swann vs. Taiji Ishimori.

Austin Aries says he’s being hunted by a Moose and doesn’t think much of Moose’s story. Aries didn’t fail at his first career, but the difference is Moose is going to fail his second too. Moose is desperate and no match for Aries.

Madison Rayne vs. Tessa Blanchard

Some forearms knock Blanchard to the floor to start but she sends Madison throat first into the middle rope. A running elbow to the back keeps Madison in trouble and Tessa kicks her in the back for two. We’re off to an abdominal stretch and a delayed vertical suplex gets two more.

Madison finally gets in a headscissors for two of her own, only to get caught in the corner for a hanging Downward Spiral. A spear gets Madison out of trouble and it’s off to the forearm exchange. Tessa gets the better of it and gets her up in a fireman’s carry, only to get pulled down with a crucifix slam for the pin at 8:04.

Rating: C. They’re going all the way in on the Madison push but I can’t imagine they’ll have her win the title at Slammiversary. I know this company LOVES its nostalgia pushes but egads that would be a big waste of Yung. Then again this is the company that has had Madison go over Tessa twice in a row, which is nuts if Tessa is sticking around for the long term.

Post match Tessa knocks her down and grabs a chair but here are Yung with the dead bridesmaids. Tessa bails and the bridesmaids beat on Madison but Allie runs in for the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was the new Impact wrapped up in a nice package: nothing bad (the biggest key of them all), some stuff that intrigues me, and no particularly great matches. The wrestling isn’t terrible but it’s nothing that’s going to blow the doors off. What the show has become is stable, but there are enough things that are starting to grow (the main event angle, Moose vs. Aries and the LAX feud) that they’re a few steps ahead of where they were a few months back. That’s a positive sign and hopefully they stay on this trajectory.

Results

Rich Swann b. Trevor Lee – Phoenix Splash

Desi Hit Squad b. Z&E – Rollup with tights to Everett

Matt Sydal b. Dezmond Xavier – Flip package rollup

Madison Rayne b. Tessa Blanchard – Crucifix slam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/05/25/new-book-nxt-the-full-sail-years-from-dallas-to-new-orleans/


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Ring of Honor TV – May 16, 2018: With High Honor

IMG Credit: Ring of Honor Wrestling

Ring of Honor
Date: May 16, 2018
Location: Stage AE, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, BJ Whitmer

This week should be a big deal with the Young Bucks getting a Tag Team Title shot against the Briscoes, which is about as high profile of a tag match as you’re going to see around here. It might be the biggest tag team match you can have and with a bigger stage, would be one of the featured matches on any major pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Klein vs. Madison Rayne

You can tell Kelly is serious here as she ties her hair back. Madison tries to speed things up to start but can’t get a sunset flip. Instead it’s some clotheslines to put Madison in trouble and we take an early break. Back with Klein choking in the corner and yelling at the crowd a lot. Madison comes back with some forearms and a cutter for two but the Rayne Drop is broken up. A second attempt works just fine for two but Klein is right back with a Samoan drop. With that not working, it’s a knee to Madison’s face for the pin at 8:12.

Rating: D+. That’s a big enough win and the kind of thing that Klein needed after her loss at Supercard of Honor. The logical move would be to have her earn another title shot and take the title from Sumie Sakai, but there’s every chance that ROH will go with one of their other unknown names to take the title instead. It’s not like it’s unprecedented.

So Cal Uncensored is ready to face the divided Bullet Club.

Jay Lethal is a better wrestler than Punishment Martinez so he’s not worried.

Here are the Motor City Machine Guns for a chat. They’ve accomplished their goal of winning the Ring of Honor Tag Team Titles but what do they do now that they’ve lost the belts? Split up? Or win the titles again? The truth is they’re not sure but they know they’re brothers for life. Cue the Dawgs and the match is on.

The Dawgs vs. Motor City Machine Guns

The Guns clean house to start and an enziguri into a Downward Spiral sends Ferrara to the floor. The Dream Sequence is broken up though and we take a break. Back with Ferrara being thrown into Shelley’s ribs in the corner but Ferrara dives onto Titus by mistake. Sabin comes in for a dive onto both of them but Titus hits both of them in the face. Now the Dream Sequence connects on Titus, who pops up with a running big boot to Sabin. The Doggy Splash gets two as everything stays broken down. Titus gets tied in the Tree of Woe though and Ferrara gets suplexed into him. Skull and Bones puts Titus away at 7:35.

Rating: C-. I still can’t stand the Dawgs but as long as they’re not talking and losing their matches, they’re not the most annoying things in the world. The Guns teasing a split is interesting as well and that could lead somewhere, though their previous singles feud in TNA really didn’t do anything for me.

The Young Bucks are ready to beat the Briscoes again.

Top Prospect Tournament First Round: Facade vs. Eli Isom

You never know what you’re going to get in this tournament. Facade describes himself as a ninja and has a woman named Danni with him. They grade near falls to start and that means an early standoff. Isom gets in a jumping knee to the face to take over as the face pace continues. A springboard spinning kick to the face of a seated Isom puts Facade down but Isom is right back up with a t-bone suplex. That doesn’t get him very far though as Facade sends him outside for a springboard flip dive, followed by a springboard clothesline back inside. And never mind as here’s Bully Ray to clothesline Facade for the DQ at 4:40.

Rating: C+. That was already better than most of last year’s Top Prospect Tournament matches as Facade was entertaining and memorable while Isom was at least trying. This thing can be VERY hit or miss and last year’s offered Josh Woods alone as an interesting prospect. At least this seems to be off to a better start. Oh and again, it’s a DQ and not the no contest that they’ll bill it as. When you interfere and hit one person, it’s a disqualification whether you want to go with that story or not.

Ray says that as the enforcer (because he wasn’t fired after yelling at his boss and beating up wrestlers at Supercard of Honor), he’s firing both of them for being bottom feeders in the wrestling business. Cue Cheeseburger (Ian: “We needed somebody to stand up to Bully Ray!” Whitmer: “AND IT’S THIS PIPSQUEAK???”) to call Ray a piece of ****.

A one armed chokeslam drops Cheeseburger so here’s COO Joe Koff to fire Ray. Well at least it was only a short term stupid move. Ray unretires, meaning he’s back as a wrestler. As long as they don’t expect me to care about Cheeseburger pinning Ray, fine. He puts on the Hall of Fame ring, which is censored ala the REAL World Title back in 1991.

The Bullet Club is ready to win the Six Man Tag Team Titles but Cody and Marty Scurll disagree about who is going to win the World Title at Best in the World.

Tag Team Titles: Young Bucks vs. Briscoes

The Briscoes are defending. Mark throws in a chair before the bell but Jay and Nick are fighting, allowing Matt to pelt it at his head instead. The brawl and match start on the floor with Nick being suplexed onto the apron and Matt getting double teamed on the other side of the ring. Nick is right back up though and the Briscos are powerbombed onto the apron to send us to a break. Back with Mark cutting off Matt’s attempt to run around the floor and get to the hot tag.

A spear cuts Mark down instead and now the hot tag connects so Nick can start in with the kicks. The Superkick Party is on and a shooting star press/standing moonsault combination gets two on Mark. Cease and Desist can’t go on so the Briscoes grab a rear naked choke and Sharpshooter of their own. Like most submissions on faces, the holds are broken up in short order. Instead it’s a Razor’s Edge into a neckbreaker (sweet) for two on Matt but the Doomsday Device is broken up. The Jay Driller gets two on Matt but Mark uses a chair to break up the Meltzer Driver for the DQ at 8:15.

Rating: B-. This needed more time and was starting to get really good by the end of the match. The Bucks are far better to watch as faces than heels, which is something that should have happened far sooner than it did. That being said, the Briscoes are just on another planet right now and they’re the most entertaining things about Ring of Honor at the moment.

Post match the Briscoes wreck the Bucks with chairs but Mark is smart enough to hide behind the entrance and take out Adam Page and Flip Gordon as they try for a save. Cody comes out a few seconds later but gets beaten down as well. Great ending sequence to make the Briscoes look even more awesome.

Overall Rating: B. This show worked very well with a variety of stories being told and nothing, save for Cheeseburger’s mere existence, felt like a waste of time. The main event was good and the World Title situation could be a lot of fun once Dalton Castle is back to full health. Good show here, and one of the best, most efficient episodes they’ve put together in a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Impact Wrestling – April 6, 2017: One Story Can Kill a Show

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 6, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero, Jeremy Borash

We’re past Wrestlemania so it’s time for the real Orlando wrestlers to take their city back. Last week’s show focused on a wide variety of stories, which helped set up a lot of this week’s material. Tonight we have a gauntlet match for the #1 contendership to the Knockouts Title plus a last man standing match between Eddie Edwards and Davey Richards. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Eli Drake vs. Caleb Konley

This starts immediately after the opening sequence with no entrances. Drake sends him outside for a cheap shot from Tyrus, followed by some right hands from Eli back inside. A neckbreaker out of the corner gives Eli two but Caleb comes right back with a rolling palm strike. That actually sends Drake outside for a suicide dive, followed by a high crossbody for no cover. Caleb goes up but Tyrus offers a distraction, allowing Drake to hit White Noise for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: D+. I’m very glad Drake has a better finisher as no one was going to buy a knee lift and clothesline for someone who is supposed to be climbing the card. Drake seems to be just a few months away from rocketing towards the main event (or at least he should be) and changing finishers was the right call. Not the worst match here and it’s a rare instance of just a match to put someone over.

Josh and JB bicker AGAIN, this time focusing on Josh calling JB ugly. Bruce Prichard comes down and demands that Josh and JB get in the ring. Josh: “I’m sorry I said I wished you were dead!” Bruce says everyone is sick of hearing from these guys so he’s got a solution. They’re both going to pick a team and we’ll see who knows the most. I hope that means the loser is off commentary.

Gauntlet Match

This is basically a Royal Rumble with the final two having a regular match where the winner gets a future title shot. Ava Storie is in at #1 and Madison Rayne is in at #2, complete with the Killer Queen song. That goes nowhere so after the first one minute interval, Rebel is in at #3. Storie runs them both over with a double clothesline and Amanda Rodriguez is in at #4.

The two newcomers slug it out with no one even attempting an elimination. M.J. Jenkins is in at #5 as the announcers just act like we should know who all these new people are. Diamante from LAX is in at #6 and Rodriguez is the first one eliminated. ODB is in at #7 and sends the other five into the corner for a huge splash.

Storie is put out after a pretty solid performance and Brandi Rhodes completes the field at #8. Brandi gets rid of Diamante and Jenkins eliminates Rebel. ODB and Brandi double team Jenkins out but Madison tosses Brandi a second later. That leaves ODB vs. Rayne for the title shot and it’s now pin or submission. Not that it lasts long or anything though as ODB hits a quick Bam for the win at 9:21.

Rating: F. Yeah this was horrible and there’s no way around it. I have no idea who half the wrestlers in this match were and commentary would rather talk about Josh being married to Madison than tell us ANYTHING about these people. To be fair though, TNA fans have proven that they’ll watch anything this company presents so they might as well fill the shows with cheap talent.

Here’s James Storm for a chat. During his entrance, Josh says he won a coin toss to determine who gets to make the first pick. So wait: do they get to pick anyone they want or do the people have to agree? Earlier tonight it was implied that the announcers have to pick the teams with JB saying Josh didn’t have enough friends to fill a lineup. Anyway, Storm says the Cowboy is back and it’s time for him to become World Champion again.

Cue Bram and Kingston to rant about Storm lying to them about the DCC. Storm says he picked the music and bought the suits while Kingston was the one begging for a job. Kingston spits in Storm’s face and takes a Last Call. Bram loads up a chair shot but gets stared down. Another Last Call sends the chair into Bram’s face and Storm hits the catchphrase.

Andrew Everett thinks he’s earned an X-Division Title match. Gregory Helms and Trevor Lee come up to say Everett can have a shot if he wins his triple threat tonight.

Andrew Everett vs. Marshe Rockett vs. Suicide

Everett kicks Rockett to the floor as the announcers KEEP GOING about their upcoming tag match before switching over to fantasy baseball. This is the kind of stuff you expect from One Night Only shows. Suicide knocks Andrew to the floor and follows with the falling dive. Back in and Rockett stomps on Everett before powerslamming him out of the air.

Everett sends both of them to the floor again and follows with a corkscrew dive. Suicide grabs something like a Black Widow on Everett as the announcers argue over whether Al Snow should have Pope’s job. A kick sends Suicide to the floor and Everett hits a shooting star for the pin on Rockett at 6:24.

Rating: C. I like the fact that they’re actually building someone up as a challenger for a title match down the line and for once there’s an actual story in this division. I have no confidence in them to follow up on all this stuff but at least we’ve got something brewing for now, which is more than they’ve done in a long time.

Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards

Last Man Standing and Eddie jumps Davey in the aisle. Eddie knocks him into the barricade and follows with two suicide dives as they quickly head into the crowd. Davey gets crotched on a barricade but ducks a dive, sending Eddie crashing into a garbage can for a good looking spot. Richards gets in a few kicks, stops to kiss Angelina Love, and grabs a chair.

Angelina throws in two more chairs with Davey setting the two of them up in the middle. Josh’s response: “I have my third member!” Eddie uses another kiss distraction to powerbomb Davey through the chairs for a six count. Not that it matters as Eddie grabs even more chairs (bringing the total up to at least six) and pelts one at Davey’s head. Eddie piles the chairs up but Angelina grabs the foot, allowing Davey to superplex Edwards onto the pile. We see Eddie’s wife Alisha Edwards in the front row for some trash talk with Angelina.

Back from a break with Davey hitting Eddie in the head with a chain wrapped fist but Alisha’s cheers bring Eddie back to his feet. Rapid fire chops have Davey in trouble and a belly to belly into the corner makes things even worse. A baseball slide sends a chair into Davey’s face and Eddie wraps a chair around Davey’s neck.

The top rope double stomp somehow doesn’t kill Davey so the women get into it, resulting in a chair taking Alisha down. Eddie gets chaired as well so Davey wraps a chain around his foot but stops with second thoughts. Angelina tells him to do it for her and Creeping Death with the chain ends Eddie at 22:43.

Rating: B+. This got the time that it needed and the violence was more than enough to make it work. These two beat the heck out of each other and made it look like they wanted to kill each other. Now the problem is they need to let the feud end here instead of just continuing it for the sake of continuing it, which gets old in a hurry.

We get a video on Veterans of War involving Operation Iraqi Freedom. I believe one of them was Gunner, who is a former member of the military.

JB wants to make Impact Wrestling great.

LAX celebrates their title win.

We look at James Storm updating his theme music in a studio.

Alberto El Patron vs. Jon Bolen

A few kicks have Bolen in trouble but he grabs a powerslam. That’s about it for his offense though as Alberto sends him into the corner for the top rope double stomp and the pin at 1:18.

Post match Alberto calls out Lashley.

Allie/Braxton Sutter and KM/Sienna are getting into it again when Karen Jarrett comes in to break it up. They’ll have a mixed tag next week.

Fury is unleashed next week and has something to do with Sutter and Allie.

Bruce Prichard is out to moderate the picking of the teams, which really is how they’re closing the show. Josh goes first and picks Lashley while JB picks Alberto El Patron. Next up we have Bram for Josh and JB picks Chris Adonis (Masters). There’s nothing in between these picks save for a little arguing here and there. Josh goes with Eli Drake and Tyrus helps Josh’s team beat down the good guys. Matt Morgan comes out for the save and gets in a staredown with Lashley as someone else gets out of a limo. We’re out of time though so go to Impact’s website to find out who the last team member is (it’s Magnus).

Overall Rating: D+. This is a show where one thing really does bring the whole thing down. We had a great gimmick match and some stuff involving the World Title but what closes the show? Bickering announcers. Can you imagine if Cole vs. Lawler closed a show instead of something involving John Cena?

This show also gave a great illustration of the problem with announcers as major characters: it was the main thing we heard about all night long. The stuff in the ring got almost no focus because we had to hear about how great Josh was and how JB didn’t want to hear about it. I’m going to assume Josh winds up being some big heel manager (which wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world) but DANG this story is ruining some good stuff on the show. Big step down from last week here and it’s almost all because of one story.

Results

Eli Drake b. Caleb Konley – White Noise

ODB won a gauntlet match last eliminating Madison Rayne

Andrew Everett b. Marshe Rockett and Suicide – Shooting star press to Rockett

Davey Richards b. Eddie Edwards – Creeping Death with a chain around the boot

Alberto El Patron b. Jon Bolen – Top rope double stomp

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Impact Wrestling – November 17, 2016: The New New Divide

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 17, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

The big story coming out of last week’s show is the unmasking of the DCC, which revealed James Storm, Bram and the yet to be named Eddie Kingston to be behind the recent attacks. The group has targeted Eddie Edwards and the Hardys, meaning we might be seeing the some combination of the three fighting the DCC tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s show ending beatdown.

Here’s Eddie Edwards for an opening chat. Eddie is a nice guy but he knows he has a target on his back. He’ll get right to it: he’s not leaving this ring until he gets to fight a member of the DCC. Cue all three of them though and the beatdown is quickly on with Eddie Kingston finally being officially referred to as…..Kingston. Jeff Hardy comes out for the save and cleans house.

After a break, Eddie and Jeff go in to see the boss (meaning Billy Corgan, who isn’t named here) but Aiden O’Shea won’t allow the cameras follow them in.

Jesse Godderz vs. Aron Rex

Non-title and pinfall or submission only, making this a glorified street fight. Jesse doesn’t waste any time and knocks Rex straight into the corner before trying an early Adonis Lock. That earns him a rake to the eyes and a chinlock because Rex is the kind of heel who uses a chinlock two minutes into a match. Rex takes it outside and sends Jesse into the barricade, followed by yet another chinlock. That steams Jesse’s hair so he sends Aron outside and then hammers away back inside. The Adonis Lock makes Rex tap at 7:53.

Rating: D+. The story here is solid enough but that really doesn’t make it interesting, which is mainly due to Rex. He won a title in a competition that didn’t work well in the first place and now he’s a heel just because, which puts him in a feud that keeps going against Godderz. Not terrible here but I have no interest in watching these two again.

Laurel Van Ness is texting Braxton Sutter, much to Allie’s annoyance. Maria comes up and laughs at Allie for thinking Brandi Rhodes wants to be her partner.

Due to the attack last week, Gail Kim is forced to vacate the Knockouts Title.

Hardy and Edwards get to face the DCC in an anything goes handicap match tonight.

Sienna/Laurel Van Ness vs. Brandi Rhodes/???

The villains seem to be called the Lady Squad. Better than Ladyballs I guess. Maria laughs at the idea that no one wants to be Brandi’s partner but Rhodes has a surprise: Madison Rayne. Madison and Sienna get things going with some forearms putting Sienna in trouble. It only takes some choking to get her back in control though, followed by Laurel choking with her boot in the corner.

A snap suplex gets two for Laurel but a missed charge allows Madison to make the hot tag to Brandi. Unfortunately that leaves Brandi to clean house and she’s just not ready to do that. Madison and Laurel fight outside and a bad looking Downward Spiral puts Sienna away at 6:01.

Rating: D. Brandi is in a weird place here as she’s being pushed as a big deal but just isn’t capable of hanging at that level in the ring yet. That being said, she’s had all of three matches and there’s definitely a natural charisma there. I don’t know if she’ll be in the ring long term but she’s trying. Unfortunately she’s trying on a stage she’s not ready for yet and that’s making things look bad.

Matt Hardy, still sane, doesn’t understand why he would give the trick or treaters green beans. Reby tells him to go back to the Impact Zone to save his brother but Matt would rather delete e-mails, including the Young Bucks newsletter. He mentions unsubscribing and the Scribe appears….but only Matt can see him. Reby wants him to get help.

Trevor Lee vs. Ethan Carter III vs. Lashley vs. Mike Bennett

One fall to a finish, no tags and the winner gets a title shot at some point in the future. It’s a big brawl to start with Lashley getting the better of it by suplexing Bennett and throwing Lee over the down and down onto Ethan. Back from a break with Trevor getting in some kicks to everyone’s face as Josh plugs the Wolf Creek season finale. Bennett and Lee seem to form a quick alliance but as is so often the case, it breaks down as soon as one of them wants the pin.

The fans want someone to kill the troll as Carter takes some shoulders in the corner. Ethan comes right back and loads up a double 1%er, only to get speared in half by Lashley. A cutter drops Lashley and a deadlift German suplex gives Lee two on Carter. Bennett starts snapping off superkicks and spinebusters, only to have Lashley give him the real spinebuster. Lee suplexes Lashley to block the spear (sweet counter) and dives over the top to take out Carter and Lashley. Back in and Carter grabs a sleeper to make Lee tap at 14:07.

Rating: C+. This was getting fun but at the same time it’s getting a bit tiresome to have Lashley and Carter rotating into the #1 contenders spot over and over and over. You know they’re going to get their title shots at some point so just let them have it later and try someone else in those spots for a change.

Reby and Matt look at some Broken Matt videos and Matt is terrified of the chaos.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake asking Ethan to come out here and be his guest. Drake gets right to the point: he wants one more match with Carter with that title shot on the line. Ethan wisely says no but Drake sweetens the pot by saying he won’t challenge for the title for one year if he loses. That’s not cool with Ethan, who wants people like Eli chasing him near the top of the ladder. However, he also wants one more fight with Drake so let’s do it next week. If Drake wins, he gets the title shot but if he loses, he can’t speak for the rest of the year. That’s good enough for Drake and the deal is made.

Decay threatens Jade with destruction at the hands of Rosemary.

Basile Baraka vs. Mahabali Shera

This feud just won’t go away. Baraka takes him down and chokes with the boot as Josh goes into a way over the top plug for a new sitcom at Pop. Shera gets tired of the trash talk and gets in a powerslam but a camel clutch is countered into a rollup for two. Another slam sets up another camel clutch to make Baraka tap at 4:05.

Rating: D. Why is this still a thing? I know they need to fill in time but is this really the best they have? Or is Shera just there to keep the Sony Six people happy? Neither guy is interesting and the Tribunal, which could have been at least something, has turned into one of the least interesting acts in a long time.

Post match the Tribunal beats Shera down until Al Snow makes the save. Josh: “AL SNOW IS TRENDING WORLDWIDE ON TWITTER RIGHT NOW!” Does Josh know that trending on Twitter is a real thing and not just a random statement? Snow and Shera shake hands, which Josh calls the Mega Powers uniting. He might be the greatest troll announcer ever and I doubt he has any idea of it.

Rosemary is creepy to Jade and it’s announced that their Knockouts Title match will be inside a cage.

Eddie Edwards/Jeff Hardy vs. DCC

Handicap match and anything goes. Jeff is just normal Jeff Hardy here and gets in an early Twist of Fate on Bram. It’s too early for the Swanton though as the rest of the DCC pulls Bram outside, leaving Jeff to dive on all three of them. Eddie gets in a few shots on Storm as we take a break. Back with the DCC in control until Jeff hits Storm in the back with a few chair shots. Kingston is sent through two open chairs in the ring but Bram comes in for the save. The Brighter Side of Suffering through a table plants Edwards, allowing Storm to superkick Jeff for the pin at 13:43.

Rating: C. Not bad here but, as is always the case, TNA doesn’t know how to wait on something. It’s fairly clear that Matt is going to be the big savior for TNA and the six man will result in Final Deletion XIX or so. That should be entertaining, but would it kill TNA to wait a little longer before doing these big matches?

Overall Rating: C-. Impact really is cut in half at this point as the top half of the show is going really well but there’s such a big gap further down the card. It’s kind of hard to go from a “dream” tag team vs. the TNA Wyatts to Snow/Shera vs. the Tribunal. I’m having a little more fun watching Impact lately but, as usual, I have no reason to believe it’s going to last.

Results

Jesse Godderz b. Aron Rex – Adonis Lock

Brandi Rhodes/Madison Rayne b. Sienna/Laurel Van Ness – Downward Spiral to Sienna

Ethan Carter III b. Lashley, Trevor Lee and Mike Bennett – Sleeper to Lee

Mahabali Shera b. Basile Baraka – Camel clutch

DCC b. Eddie Edwards/Jeff Hardy – Last Call to Hardy

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Impact Wrestling – September 29, 2016: So Close Now

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 29, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s an interesting show this week for very different reasons. Above all else (at least in theory) this is the go home show for Bound For Glory. However, if the rumors are true, there’s also a strong chance that this is one of the, if not the very, last episodes of the show in general. Let’s get to it.

Jeremy Borash is in the ring to introduce Ethan Carter III and Lashley as the captains for tonight’s Lethal Lockdown. We’re going to get something like a live draft with the following teams announced:

Lashley, Drew Galloway, Mike Bennett, Maria Kanellis

Carter, Aron Rex, Moose, Gail Kim

The captains talk a lot of trash and say this is all that matters to them at the pay per view. Lashley isn’t like the people Carter has beaten because he can end Ethan’s career. Carter has a challenge: the two of them starting Lethal Lockdown one on one. Lashley agrees.

X-Division Title: Eddie Edwards vs. DJZ

DJZ is defending after accepting Edwards’ challenge last week. They chop it out to start until DJZ gets in a hurricanrana to send Eddie outside. DJZ’s flip dive doesn’t work though and it’s Eddie sending the champ into the barricade for a suicide dive. A sitout powerbomb gets two for Eddie but he takes too long going for the Boston Knee Party, allowing DJZ to hit a ZDT to retain at 5:34.

Rating: C. Well that happened. This was yet another match that probably should have been at Bound For Glory but instead let’s throw it on here for five minutes with no time to develop. As usual there’s nothing significant going on in the X-Division and there’s no title match announced three days before the biggest show of the year. I’m sure some multi-man match will be added on because that’s how this division works.

Post match the Helms Dynasty comes out and beats up both guys.

Maria yells at Allie some more when Laura comes in. Allie looks like she’s about to cry as Maria says this is what a woman should look like.

Mike Bennett and Moose had a sitdown interview earlier with Moose talking about how he’s dealt with people like Bennett for his entire football career. Bennett says this isn’t football and promises to teach Moose a lesson on Sunday. Moose says after he beats Bennett all around the ring, the fans will be chanting one name.

Madison Rayne vs. Laurel Van Ness

Laurel offers Madison a chance to kiss her hand before the match but Madison forearms her in the face. That means it’s time for a trip to the floor so Allie can check Laurel’s makeup. Back in and Laurel gets in a few slaps as even Josh is sounding bored with this match. Laurel hits a curb stomp for the pin at 3:56.

Rating: D. We’re three days away from the biggest show of the year and TNA is showcasing a newcomer instead of building up the matches they’ve got coming up. It says a lot when Josh Matthews, who can get hyped over whatever latest stupid sitcom he’s shilling for Pop, sounds like he’d rather be anywhere else. Laurel was watchable and the gimmick works but not the right time to debut it.

Allie announces Laurel as the winner, as per Maria’s orders.

Lashley offers a title shot to anyone who takes Ethan out.

Drew Galloway is in the ring and calls out Aron Rex for a chat. Galloway talks about how he made this the place to be (for unemployment checks) so you’re welcome. Rex: “First of all, get your own catchphrase.” Aron promises to beat Drew up like a greasy haired loser so Drew brings up the stuntman. This Sunday there can only be one and that’s going to be Drew Galloway. Security comes out to break up the brawl but both guys get in cheap shots.

Decay promises to destroy the Hardys.

Long recap of Decay vs. House Hardy.

Reby Hardy vs. Rosemary

Reby throws her around to start but gets choked down. Some forearms to the back have Reby in trouble but she grabs a Twist of Fate, only to have Steve get on the apron for a distraction. Reby goes after Steve and it’s the mist to Reby’s eyes for the DQ at 3:10.

Rating: D-. Yeah this was all you could have expected. Neither of them are regular wrestlers and the “match” was your old school Divas catfight instead of anything resembling wrestling. This feud can’t end quickly enough for me as I’m tired of hearing them say the same things for months on end.

Post match the big brawl breaks out and Rosemary gives Reby a Side Effect through a table.

Lashley wins the coin toss for his team.

Back from a break, Decay beats on Matt and Jeff even more. They fight to the back where Matt is electrocuted by a cable and we go to three camera shots at once with Steve shouting DECAY.

Cody Rhodes vignette.

Maria and Gail have another sitdown interview with Maria insisting on being introduced properly. They insult each other a few times and argue over whether the title or the Hall of Fame is more important.

Tyrus is talking about the Bound For Gold match when Eli Drake interrupts. A business partnership is offered but Tyrus isn’t interested. Then what’s the point of his character?

We run down the Bound For Glory card. The X-Division Title isn’t mentioned.

Ethan gives his team a pep talk.

Team Carter vs. Team Lashley

This is Lethal Lockdown, meaning there’s a cage with weapons around the ring. Two men will start for five minutes and then Lashley’s team sends in a man for a 2-1 advantage for two minutes. After those two minutes are up, Team Carter sends in a second man to even things up. The teams alternate every two minutes until all eight are in. At that point the cage roof lowers and it’s one fall to a finish.

Carter is in the ring to start but Lashley sends Bennett out to start instead. They slug it out to start with Carter getting the better of it, only to walk into a spinebuster. A clothesline gets Carter out of trouble and both guys are down until it’s Galloway giving Lashley’s team their advantage. The beating is on and we take a break.

Back with Rex coming in to even things up and the good guys take over, as is always the case in these things. Lashley gives his team another advantage as the clock is all over the place here. There’s nothing to talk about here as they’re just hitting each other over and over during these periods. Moose even things up and hits a spinning crossbody but everything evens out until it’s Maria coming down the ramp.

Bennett tells her not to get in though so the brawling continue until Gail Kim comes out and throws Maria inside. That lasts all of ten seconds as Maria runs out with Gail chasing her up the ramp. I’m SO glad they were added here and not, say, whoever is in the X-Division Title match. Ah right, WE DON’T HAVE ONE OF THOSE FOR THE PAY PER VIEW.

Back from another break with Lashley’s team in full control until Lashley has them stop for a meeting, allowing Rex to come back with a chair shot. Moose and Rex take turns beating Lashley down with various weapons. Bennett gets in a pipe shot on Rex and superkicks a chair into Moose’s face.

Moose does the same thing with a dropkick but walks into the Futureshock. It’s down to Carter vs. Lashley with Ethan winning a slugout and sending him head first into the cage. The TK3 is no sold so Lashley spears him down and grabs the head and arms choke. Carter goes for the ropes but it doesn’t matter inside the cage. Ethan passes out at 29:03.

Rating: C+. The women being a big waste of time aside, this was a standard Lethal Lockdown with an odd ending as Carter probably shouldn’t lose to end the go home show. Lashley continues to look dominant and he probably should drop the title on Sunday. The other people were really just background noise here, which is why this was such a waste of a gimmick. Just do an eight person tag or something.

Lashley’s choice for the main event: no holds barred.

Overall Rating: D+. Bound For Glory, assuming it happens, really isn’t looking that hot on paper and this show didn’t do it many favors. The matches have all been built up well enough but they’re still not interesting. The main event being no holds barred doesn’t do much for me and the X-Division still not having a match isn’t much better. The company certainly isn’t heading in on a high note but that’s pretty standard anymore.

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Impact Wrestling – July 28, 2016: What To Delete Next

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 28, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

Tonight is still about finding a #1 contender for the World Title as we have the semifinals of the Bound For Glory Playoff with four people still possibly advancing to fight Lashley. Speaking of Lashley he now holds both the TNA World and X-Division Titles so we’ll have to see what he does with both belts. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s first round to get us to the final four.

Here’s Matt Hardy for his match but first, Matt summons Brother Nero to the ring, meaning we get to hear Reby say OBSOLETE over and over again. Matt commands Jeff to help him win his match tonight despite THAT NOT BEING PART OF THE STORY. We’re still not ready as Matt growls at Ethan like an intoxicated gorilla. Ethan says nothing, including Senor Benjamin or Vanguard 1 bringing a dilapidated boat to the ring and dropping it on his head. Matt: “You are nothing more….” Ethan: “MY PROMO IS NOT OVER!!!” Carter says this man is Jeff Hardy and he is a relevant creature.

Bound For Glory Playoff Semifinals: Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III

Matt bites the hand to block a chop so Carter goes with a middle rope dropkick, only to have Ethan tweak his ankle. A belly to belly suplex lets Matt kick at the leg but Ethan kicks him out to the floor for a dive. That just hurts his ankle again though and Ethan has to break out of the Twist of Fate. A Stinger Splash looks to set up the TK3 but Matt kicks the ankle again. The second TK3 works but Reby throws in the hammer. The referee is distracted by…..I think Jeff but Matt gets caught with the hammer anyway. As the referee takes it away, Ethan takes his own boot off to knock Matt out, followed by the 1%er to advance at 7:30.

Rating: C. The ankle injury worked fine but there’s still much insanity going on with the Matt vs. Jeff feud. Thankfully it seems to be wrapping up at Bound For Glory but why am I supposed to believe that it’s the final match? It’s kind of hard to buy that when they’ve already done the FINAL match. Oh and again: there’s no reason Jeff is Matt’s servant. Owning Jeff’s intellectual property doesn’t mean he has to do everything Matt tells him, even in TNA’s odd world.

Madison Rayne is annoyed at Maria and Allie so they give her Gail Kim tonight.

Post break, Matt yells at Jeff and promises to make it worse.

Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim

No entrances. Gail gets an early two off a backbreaker but Madison knees her in the ribs and a kick to the head gets two. An enziguri gets the same for Madison and there’s a slide into a clothesline against the bottom rope. Back up and Gail hits a quick Eat Defeat for the win at 4:59.

Rating: D+. These two have fought several times over the years and it’s really not interesting to see them do it again as we build towards Maria vs. Gail Kim in what should be a one sided slaughter. Madison isn’t the most intriguing character in the first place as she’s really just that person who used to be important but time has passed her by.

Mike Bennett and Moose are ready to destroy Lashley.

Rosemary and Bram meet in the woods and we get a flashback to Rosemary looking normal. When she was younger (as in early 20s) she had a cat. One day the cat got sick so she took it to mama, who told her everything would be ok. Then her Mama threw the cat in a trashcan to make Rosemary crazy like she is today. Back to reality, Bram thinks Rosemary is a little weird but they stop to look at a barn. It’s always a barn.

Moose vs. David Star

David is sat on the top rope for a dropkick out to the floor but Star comes back with a running dropkick. A pop up apron powerbomb ends Star’s run though and probably most of his career at the same time. Back in the and the Gamebreaker (basically a Rainmaker but with a discus lariat but without pulling Star in, making the spin rather pointless) ends Star at 2:22.

Post match here’s Lashley to come after Moose. We come back from a break with Mike Bennett pulling Moose back from Lashley and asking who wants to see this match. Eh not yet though as Bennett wants Moose to wait because Bennett needs him in the corner for the playoff match later.

The two of them leave so Lashley says he’s already got two titles but he wants all the singles gold. This brings out DJZ to suck up a bit so Lashley says DJZ can pick the match type for the X-Division Title match (remember that DJZ became #1 contender at Ultimate X). DJZ picks a ladder match and it’s on right now. Thankfully there are ladders ready just in case Lashley allowed DJZ to pick a stipulation.

X-Division Title: Lashley vs. DJZ

Lashley is defending and it’s a ladder match. DJZ gets thrown around to start but scores with a middle rope back elbow to the jaw. Lashley throws the ladder out of the ring because he can so they head outside with DJZ hitting a flip dive off the announcers’ table. Back from a break with Lashley crushing DJZ with a ladder and no selling a baseball slide to drive the ladder into his chest.

Back in and the Dominator plants DJZ but he’s still able to dropkick Lashley off the ladder. That’s not enough for the climb though as Lashley lifts up the ladder and DJZ at the same time (Pope: “That’s not something you’ll see in the X-Division.” Except for right now, when we’re seeing it in the X-Division.). DJZ grabs a quick tornado DDT to plant Lashley but he slams DJZ off the ladder and retains at 12:38.

Rating: C-. This was fine even though the ending was obvious. There were some Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy tones here so the story worked but it was only as good as a DJZ match could get. I still really don’t like the idea of the X-Division being a prop for the World Champion to use. It was bad enough when Seth Rollins did the same thing to the US Title last year and I’m fairly convinced that this is a copy of that story. Eleven months is long enough to copy something right?

Ethan Carter III and Drew Galloway want to fight each other in the finals.

Bram and Rosemary look at the barn and Rosemary asks if it matters. We go to the flashback again with Rosemary talking to a tree about some guy named John. Rosemary writes in a journal and signs an R in her own blood. This keeps cutting in and out with pictures in her Decay attire and is all over the place like the Final Deletion style videos. Back in reality, Bram says it doesn’t matter if we hear about these old things because they’re here now. To be continued.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake. Eli calls Lashley a cross eyed halfwit and says you can’t just go around collecting titles like this is Pokemon Go. He likes the odds of putting Lashley’s two titles against his one but here’s James Storm to interrupt. Drake says he was calling out contenders and not a drunk. Storm brings up the DQ in their match and offers Drake another beer. Eli pulls out a jug of water but Storm kicks it out to the floor. Storm: “WATER SUCKS!”

That’s still a no so Storm makes parent sex jokes, earning himself a bunch of dummy’s. Drake will give him another shot but if Storm loses, he can’t have any more beer, can’t ride the Boozer Cruiser and can’t use that stupid country song. So…..he wants Storm deleted? Storm takes a swig of beer, drinks the one he had for Drake, and says it’s on. A belt shot misses but Drake gets in a low blow and Blunt Force Trauma.

Tyrus is still ready to fix your problems.

Grado calls Tyrus to try and get his help against the Tribunal but he and Mahabali Shera have no money. There’s a match next week.

Decay beats the BroMans down in the back and there’s a match up next.

Tag Team Titles: Decay vs. BroMans

Joined in progress with only Raquel at ringside. Decay is defending and this is Monster’s Ball just because. The champs are in control and pouring tacks out onto the mat as this is one sided so far. Jesse gets slammed down would rather grab a chair than follow up. Robbie ducks a double clothesline so Robbie can springboard in with a double clothesline of his own as the challengers take over.

Abyss gets a chair dropkicked into his face and a double spear sends him through a barbed wire board. Jesse grabs the Adonis Lock with Steve’s face in the tacks but Abyss breaks it up and throws him through a table at ringside. Cue another barbed wire board and Janice (of course) but Raquel sneaks in with a low blow to save her buddies. Robbie drops Janice though and a chokeslam onto the barbed wire retains the titles at 6:50.

Rating: C. If you’ve seen one of these you’ve seen them all, save for the pretty cool Adonis Lock onto the tacks spot. This was another gimmick match for the sake of having a gimmick match though and that gets really old in a hurry. It was fun enough and a violent (by TNA standards) brawl but almost nothing we haven’t seen before.

Bound For Glory Playoff Semifinals: Mike Bennett vs. Ethan Carter III

Moose jumps Galloway during the entrance and powerbombs him onto the apron. Drew still says ring the bell because disqualifications cannot possibly happen before the bell. Bennett slowly beats him down until Drew grabs an overhead belly to belly to get himself a breather. A quick cutter gives Mike two and he throws Galloway outside. They head outside with Bennett going chest first into the bottom of the ring (as in the wood that holds it up) for two.

Drew tries Futureshock but spins Mike around first. That’s not enough though as Bennett slips away and punches the referee by mistake. Cue Moose to take Galloway out with a middle rope Sky High but Bennett only gets two. Now it’s Carter to go after Moose and send him into the steps, only to miss a kendo stick shot which hits Galloway by mistake. Moose pulls Carter to the floor, leaving Mike to hit the MIP for the pin at 7:46.

Rating: C. WAY too messy near the end but they got the point across. In theory this should set up Galloway vs. Carter at Bound For Glory but I can’t imagine they’ll do Bennett vs. Lashley at Bound For Glory. Of course there’s always the big multi-man match that wrestling companies love so much and would be as big of a mess as you can get.

Overall Rating: C-. The show was fine but it really does show how weak they are once you get out of the upper midcard. Gail Kim is still a boring face of the Knockouts, the X-Division is a prop, Decay is still doing the same things they’ve been doing and the idea of Grado/Shera vs. the Tribunal again makes me very drowsy. Storm vs. Drake does sound good though so not all hope is lost. If nothing else, well done on having six matches in a week, which is hard for any tow hour show to pull off. Finally, they seem to have dropped Dixie vs. Corgan for now, though I can’t imagine it stays gone.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – 1%er

Gail Kim b. Madison Rayne – Eat Defeat

Moose b. David Star – Gamebreaker

Lashley b. DJZ – Lashley pulled down the title

Decay b. BroMans – Chokeslam onto a barbed wire board

Mike Bennett b. Drew Galloway – MIP

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