Impact Wrestling
Date: June 28, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

Things are getting interesting around here as there are only two more weeks until Smackdown moves to Tuesday nights, leaving Impact with an hour against a live WWE show with top names appearing every week. There has been no word on a time slot change or any major plans for what TNA might to do counteract this but I wouldn’t like their chances going head to head. Maybe we can get more Matt vs. Jeff out of this. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at last week’s major events.

Mike Bennett and Maria are in the ring to open things up. Maria gloats that Dixie Carter is gone this week so she’s running the show. This brings us to the new X-Division Champion with Bennett saying he has a golden ticket. In two weeks, he gets to prove that he’s the best X-Division Champion of all time. Cue Lashley to say Bennett is half the man that he is and doesn’t want to go here. Bennett cuts a really good promo about how it doesn’t matter who he’s facing because he’s taking the title.

This brings out Ethan Carter III to say he’s ready to go tonight and thinks Bennett got where he is by sucking up to a rock star. A fight is ready to break out until Billy Corgan comes out to say he’s an icon elsewhere but he’s here to be a fair judicial observer. Carter says there’s an infinite amount of sadness (Smashing Pumpkins album) in this situation so Corgan makes an X-Division battle royal for tonight with the winner facing Bennett for the title later tonight. The brawl is on but Drew Galloway comes out for the save, only to hit the Claymore on Carter by mistake.

I really hate Destination X. The X Title isn’t mentioned by any main eventer all year and gets no time. Then some main eventer goes and wins it without much effort, uses it at the show and then drops the title back into obscurity for another eleven months. I don’t even consider this exposure for the title and the division because it really does come off like the main eventers are slumming with the belt and could take it anytime. How does that strengthen the division or the title?

Drew and Ethan argue over whether or not that kick was intentional.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Sienna

Sienna is defending and Allie says it’s time to force Gail into retirement. Gail ducks a charge to start and gets two off a clothesline out of the corner. Sienna uses a Samoan Drop to break up a crucifix attempt and we hit the chinlock. Cue Jade to go after Allie but Jade comes out with her baton to knock Jade out. Sienna hits a Pounce (the Silencer) to retain at 3:15.

Rating: D. This was your weekly Gail Kim praise period as most of the match was about how awesome she is for going into the Hall of Fame. Kurt Angle wasn’t praised this much and it’s getting a little annoying to hear every single week. I’m sure she’ll get the belt back at Bound For Glory in the big feel good moment because she’s a pioneer (who is still here) and we can’t let the division go on without her.

Matt is wheeled in (in a chair with wheels as he calls it) and says, in what sounds like a thicker accent, that he’s broken but the war with Brother Nero will never end. I’m sure it won’t, but that won’t stop TNA from billing every match as the biggest one yet and possibly the last every single time.

Bennett and Galloway run into each other in the back with Mike saying he can beat the entire X-Division one after another. Drew says be careful what you say because those guys are great. They compare who has beaten who with Drew saying he’s actually won the World Title.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake with Eli popping up from behind his podium. Drake: “When I say dummy, you say yeah. Dummy!” Crowd: “YEAH!” Drake: “I wasn’t talking to you!” He talks about going home for a dinner with his father and some friends. Apparently the Drakes are famous for their mashed potatoes and the beatings they give people and Eli does them both better than anyone.

Tonight’s guest is James Storm, who actually walks to the ring for once. Storm calls him Eli Dork and starts an ELI DRAKE DUMMY chant. Drake hits the button a lot so Storm says let’s make it a drinking game. That’s fine with Drake who pulls out a jug of water, earning himself a round of boos. Drake: “You’re gonna boo WATER?” This is the greatest talk show host ever and Drake wants to know where Storm’s title is.

Storm thinks we should change this game to him slapping Drake every time he hits the button. That’s enough for Drake who cuts the interview short and tells Storm to take his stupid beer with him. Drake wraps it up and eats the Last Call. This went a bit long but Drake was great as usual and Storm as a challenger is fine.

Jeff Hardy will meet his brother in the ring tonight face to face. They can’t go a single week without these two doing something???

We get a graphic labeled “earlier tonight” of a beatdown from last week with Decay destroying Bram.

Rosemary sits on Bram’s lap and says everyone comes to decay eventually so just let it happen.

Here’s Matt in his wheelchair with Reby pushing him around. He wants to be wheeled around the ring so he can look into the eyes of everyone that has put him in this place. The fans want Jeff so Matt yells about how he’s been broken all over this place. He wants Jeff out here to look him in the face and that’s exactly what he gets after a break. Matt says he wants this to be over but promises to never stop pursuing Jeff until he gets what he needs, which is one win.

Give him six weeks and he’ll be ready for their final battle. Matt wants to raise the stakes and make it for the Hardy name. Didn’t we do this one already? Reby freaks out for no apparent reason so Jeff tells her to get on her broom and fly away. More screeching ensues so Matt jumps out of the chair and destroys Jeff, because selling injuries off a big cage match isn’t a thing around here. Matt hits him with a chair and wraps it around Jeff’s neck for a Twist of Hate. The final match is in one week…..at Matt’s house. Matt keeps saying it will be the final deletion.

Battle Royal

Eddie Edwards, Braxton Sutter, Trevor Lee, Rockstar Spud, Andrew Everett, DJZ, Mandrews

The winner gets a title shot tonight with Mike Bennett and Maria on commentary. Only Edwards gets an entrance so it’s kind of hard to tell who all is in this. Spud is eliminated early and Mandrews eats a forearm from Lee, allowing Everett to put him out. Eddie hurricanranas Lee and Everett at the same time as Bennett lists off some luchadors that trained him, such as El Flippy.

DJZ is sent out and we’re down to four with Sutter, Everett, Edwards and Lee. Everett and Edwards wind up on the apron as Bennett gets off commentary. Bennett grabs Eddie’s foot so Lee can knock him out. We get some heel miscommunication and Sutter knocks both of them out for the title shot at 4:55.

Rating: D. I’ve never been a fan of these nothing battle royals with almost no one involved as they make the division look so worthless. This was a bunch of people who are lucky to get a match every few weeks with a guy who has had all of three matches in the company getting the win. Have a regular match or something but find a way to make them more entertaining.

Post match the Helms Dynasty beats Sutter down and Bennett is ready to go.

X-Division Title: Mike Bennett vs. Braxton Sutter

Bennett is defending and walks around for about a minute to start. A small package gives Braxton two but the Miracle in Progress retains Bennett’s title at 1:12.

Grado and Mahabali Shera have a third man to face Al Snow and Tribunal. It’s like that match in 1996 where people are wondering who the third man is.

Al Snow/Tribunal vs. Mahabali Shera/Grado/???

Can anyone tell me why the Tribunal is two people and Al Snow is a separate entity? Grado and Shera get jumped before the third man comes out and it’s…..Tyrus. Eh I’ve heard of worse ideas. Shera slams Baraka to start before it’s off to Snow, with the whistle, to pound on Grado. The beating doesn’t last long as Tyrus comes in to clean house. Baraka dives at him and gets caught in a World’s Strongest Slam for the pin at 2:57. The Tribunal had some promise at first and now they’re about where I expected them to wind up.

Bennett says that was a ten star match and he’s cashing in next week before anything else can happen.

TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Drew Galloway vs. Lashley

Lashley is defending. We start after a break because adding another four minutes to the match time tonight is out of the question. Lashley tells them both to bring it to start but Drew and Ethan get in an argument after taking him down. It breaks down into your regular triple threat with Lashley cleaning house until the challengers start double teaming him.

A double suplex is almost broken up through pure power so they just throw Lashley down instead. Lashley is knocked outside so the other two can chop it out with Carter getting the better of it. The 1%er is countered into the Future Shock but Lashley runs in for the save at two. A spinebuster gets two on Galloway but Ethan can’t hit the TK3 on the champ. The Claymore hits Ethan by mistake, setting up back to back spears to retain Lashley’s title at 9:03.

Rating: C+. I’m so glad they gave this the time it deserved after all the build it received in that whole week they gave it to set up. The match was entertaining enough while it lasted, but those last three words are the key. They didn’t even get ten minutes for a major title match like this and for what? So Al Snow could have a few minutes in the ring? Really? I’m curious to see where they’re going with Lashley now, other than presumably Bennett and then the likely showdown with Jeff Hardy.

Overall Rating: D. This was TNA in a nutshell: less than twenty two minutes of wrestling in two hours, ANOTHER Matt vs. Jeff match was made, the X-Division was patted on the head and told “aw you’re cute, now let the big boys have your title” and Al Snow gets a match because there was no one else around to give that character to. Oh and let’s praise Gail Kim because we haven’t this week.

I couldn’t stand this show and it’s going to get even better when they have Dixie Carter come back to talk about how serious everything is next week. There’s some good stuff around here but there are SO many problems dragging the rest of the show down and next week it’s back to Hardyville for whatever Matt’s latest genius idea will be.

Results

Sienna b. Gail Kim – Silencer

Braxton Sutter won a battle royal last eliminating Andrew Everett and Trevor Lee

Mike Bennett b. Braxton Sutter – Miracle in Progress

Grado/Mahabali Shera/Tyrus b. Al Snow/Tribunal – World’s Strongest Slam to Baraka

Lashley b. Drew Galloway and Ethan Carter III – Spear to Carter

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: June 14, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s past Slammiversary and we have a new World Champion as Lashley took the title from Drew Galloway via knockout. Tonight is a special show though as we have four title matches with the World, King of the Mountain, Tag Team and X-Division Titles all on the line. Let’s get to it.

We open with…..the feed screwing up as it’s a bunch of looping commercials.

Eighteen minutes in and we see Eli Drake coming out to face Jeff Hardy for the King of the Mountain Title. And never mind as we’re back to the commercial loop.

Apparently that match ran about two minutes as Lashley comes out to the ring for a chat at 9:21. Never mind again as the loop is back on at 9:22. At 9:23 Lashley is back to say that anything can happen on live TV. Oh and the audio is screwed up and out of sync. He talks about how Drew Galloway lost the title and it’s back to the loop at 9:25.

At 9:32 (with a LIVE graphic in the corner), Ethan Carter III is in the back talking to Drew Galloway about how tough his schedule is and we’re back on the commercials in about twenty seconds.

It’s 9:45 and the only word from anyone is that Pop TV is having technical issues. Still nothing on screen or anything as the only information is coming from Twitter.

10:00 and no changes.

At 10:14 we get a crawling message saying the show will be airing in its entirety. This message airs once and doesn’t say what time the show will be starting. The graphic starts running on a loop a few minutes later and is gone by 10:20.

10:40 and the graphic is still gone with no updates in sight.

The show starts airing at 10:50 with no announcement whatsoever. It just started airing, complete with the crawler still airing.

We open with a package from Slammiversary with the footage turning to stills before the big moments actually happen.

Josh Matthews: “Tonight LIVE on Impact, witness the fallout from Slammiversary.”

Lashley comes out to open the show, meaning the very brief clips we saw earlier were out of order. Last week Lashley promised to win the title and here he is with the belt. Everyone else has run out the building to get away from him but here’s Ethan Carter III to interrupt. Lashley says Carter is a joke and doesn’t want this fight. After Lashley beats him, there’s no one left.

Cue Drew Galloway to interrupt but Lashley calls him a loser. Drew tells him to shut up but Lashley thinks he looks like garbage. Lashley says he’s flat out better than Drew and everyone knows it, including EC3. Drew doesn’t care because he’s invoking his rematch clause right here tonight.

Yesterday, Jeff Hardy challenged Eli Drake for the King of the Mountain Title.

King of the Mountain Title: Eli Drake vs. Jeff Hardy

Drake is defending. Jeff starts fast and sends Eli out to the floor for a baseball slide, only to eat a big clothesline. Hardy takes forever to get back in and eats a swinging neckbreaker for two before we hit the chinlock. A powerslam out of the corner gets two for Eli but Jeff comes back with a quick Whisper in the Wind. Eli dives into a powerbomb but grabs a second powerslam for two. Blunt Force Trauma is countered into the Twist of Fate followed by the Swanton, only to have Matt Hardy run in and bite Earl Hebner’s hands and face. Jeff goes after him for the DQ at 7:37.

Rating: D+. Mostly boring match here with Drake being much better when he can insult people on the mic though he’s passable in the ring. The worst thing here though is Matt vs. Jeff is continuing after what should have been the blowoff match. That’s the signature match between the two of them and Jeff won clean. There’s no reason for this to continue other than that’s the best TNA can come up with.

Ethan and Drew are in the back with Carter saying Drew worked himself too hard with his schedule as champion. Drew knows how to face Lashley and after he gets the belt back, Ethan is getting a title shot.

Jeff is still in the ring and says he’s sore after Sunday but he did what he had to do to get rid of his brother (Brother Moore. “If I can be Brother Nero, he can be Brother Moore”). Apparently that wasn’t enough though because Matt is still crazy. Matt pops up above the video screen to say this is where Broken Matt Hardy was born. This was where Jeff Hardy tried to end his career with no remorse for Matt, Reby or Maxill.

Matt wants Jeff to be DELETED but Jeff thinks Matt would be better off cutting a six minute promo in a hotel than this bull. Apparently Jeff has to come up and fight him or they’ll fight again next week. Jeff comes towards the stage and grabs a table but Matt says they should fight with hon-uh (his way to say honor). That’s fine with Jeff who climbs the steps and starts fighting, only to have Reby sneak up and spray him with a fire extinguisher. Matt slides Jeff down the railing and through a table.

After a break, Matt wants to face Jeff next week in Six Sides of Steel. Matt does this weird biting thing as he talks.

X-Division Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is challenging and his manager Shane Helms jumps Eddie from behind to give Trevor an early advantage. Trevor starts firing off some right hands but charges into a boot in the corner. Eddie can’t hit his Backpack Stunner and another Helms distraction lets Lee get in a jumping knee to the jaw for two. Eddie dives through the ropes to take out Shane before a running knee to the chest (The Boston Knee Party. Seriously.) takes out Lee for the pin to retain at 4:00.

Rating: C. This was fine and hopefully wraps up the Lee vs. Edwards feud. I’m sure we’ll be seeing Shane vs. Edwards now though because that’s what the fans want to see: a guy in his 40s who was a big deal like ten years ago facing a guy who has the X-Division Title because his partner got injured.

Video on the Hall of Fame.

The BroMans spy on Raquel as a way to plug a Big Brother show.

We see a clip of Ethan and Lashley talking “during the break”, despite the fact that this version is being aired with no breaks due to the technical issues. Ethan says he doesn’t care who the champion is because he’s coming for the title. That sounds fine with Lashley because he’d love to take Ethan out.

Dixie Carter is in the ring to announce the new Hall of Famer as the roster is on the stage. After a quick speech about what this means, the newest inductee is announced as Gail Kim, which was pretty easily guessed months ago. Gail comes to the ring in tears and we go to a package on her, including the fact that she’s a five time Knockouts Champion with 232 days as champion. I have no idea where they got that number from as according to Wikipedia, her last reign alone was 232 days and she’s held it for over 700 days combined. They can’t even get their HALL OF FAME packages right?

Dixie praises Gail for creating the greatest female divisions in the world and thinks she’ll go down as the greatest in the world. The official induction is at Bound For Glory. Gail talks about how great her career has been because of this company and how important it’s been to her. She thanks everyone she’s ever worked with and is so grateful to be here.

Decay says they feel the presence of someone’s darkness.

We see Marti Bell costing Jade the Knockouts Title on Sunday.

Marti rants about how screwed up the Dollhouse was but through it all, she and Jade stood by each other. Once Jade became champion though, that title was her new best friend. Cue Jade for a brawl.

Tag Team Titles: Decay vs. BroMans vs. Mahabali Shera/Grado vs. Tribunal

Decay is defending and this is one fall to a finish. You would think Shera and Grado losing to the Tribunal would prevent them from getting a title shot immediately but things rarely go as they should around here. Baron Dax and Shera get things going and work on a wristlock each. It’s off to Robbie vs. Abyss with the latter easily destroying E. until Baraka comes in to steal a two count. A chinlock keeps Robbie down but he comes back with a Boom Drop and the tag off to Jesse as house is cleaned.

Jesse springboards in to dropkick Abyss to the floor before a quick BroDown sets up the Adonis Lock on Steve. Abyss makes the save though and chokeslams Jesse, only to have Shera come off the top to take Abyss down. Everything breaks down with Grado working on Steve in the ring until Snow shoves Grado off the top. Abyss chokeslams Steve onto Grado for the pin to retain at 6:46.

Rating: D+. This was your usual “here are a bunch of people running around like crazy” mess, which makes for a match that is too hard to keep track of with no one being able to stand out. Decay continues to impress though and lives WAY beyond what you would expect them to be able to do.

Maria tells Allie to leave her and Mike Bennett alone. She is FURIOUS that Gail is going into the Hall of Fame because no one appreciates them. Mike is ready to leave right now but Maria says they need to go to the ring and get everything they want.

Jeff Hardy accepts Matt’s challenge for next week.

Here are Mike (in a shirt covered in pineapples) and Maria with something to say. Mike says TNA needs a hero like him but the people have rejected him. Maria screeches that the loss on Sunday was a conspiracy from TNA management and they want it stripped from the record books.

They demand Dixie get out here right now but get Billy Corgan instead. Mike says he’s disappointed so here’s Dixie to back Billy up. Maria yells at her a lot but Dixie reminds her that we are LIVE tonight. Dixie says there’s too much talking and not enough wrestling here, especially from Maria who hasn’t had a single one on one match yet. If Maria has issues she should set up a meeting about it but Maria says the finger of blame should be pointed at Dixie because she’s the problem.

Maria thinks she could run this place better than Dixie and Billy must agree with her. She and Mike should be in the Hall of Fame but Dixie calls her self absorbed and thinks Maria shouldn’t be running the Knockouts division. Maria goes on and on about how awesome she is and how she’s a self made woman, only to have Dixie slap her in the face. Lame slap of course but did you expect anything else?

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Lashley

Drew, with heavily taped ribs, is challenging and Ethan Carter III is on commentary. They immediately fight on the floor with Drew taking over early and making sure to slide back in to break up the count. Lashley goes after the ribs and steps on the taped up part before dropping him on the apron with a side slam. They get inside for the first time with Lashley throwing Drew over the top and down to the floor for a big crash. Lashley is in full control but stops to stare at Ethan, allowing Drew to come back with some chops.

Back in and Lashley misses the spear and gets caught in something like a Kimura. Lashley escapes and grabs a Crossface, only to have Drew reverse into a Tombstone but Lashley reverses that as well, only to get caught in a piledriver for two. Drew’s super Celtic Cross gets two but the Claymore takes out the referee. Lashley hits a pair of spears and grabs a chair, only to have Ethan take the chair away. Carter hits Drew by mistake (nice Summerslam 1997 ending) and Lashley side chokes Drew for the knockout win at 10:18.

Rating: C. I wasn’t really feeling this one but Ethan vs. Drew could be one heck of a feud for the #1 contendership, though I do wonder where that leaves Lashley. They really weren’t hiding the ending they had set up and that almost always draws away some of the attention. Still though, decent enough match with the time they had to work with.

Overall Rating: C-. So let’s recap here (ignoring the technical issues at the moment): all title matches, no title changes, and what looks like the start of Dixie vs. Maria. This felt like a way to long way to sit around and wait for next week to really go anywhere. It’s not the worst show by any stretch but almost nothing got me interested here and that’s a bad sign on a night when a lot of people should have been watching.

That brings us to the small room that couldn’t contain the elephant that was around tonight. This was one of the worst examples of production, behind the scenes work and handling a major issue that I’ve ever seen. Sure a lot of it is probably Pop TV’s fault but of course TNA is going to find a way to blame ANYONE but themselves. That’s one of the things that drives me insane about TNA: they almost never seem to accept any responsibility. The show was taped and there didn’t seem to be any issues with the show that aired before Impact. What a coincidence that TNA’s show for the week isn’t working right.

What bothers me the most though is the lack of anything resembling communication between TNA and their fans. All they would say was “Pop TV is having an issue and we’ll be back in a bit.” Nothing about the time, nothing about when the show would air and very little about thanking the fans for their patience and sticking with TNA. It was a bunch of sitting around waiting on this show which wasn’t even that great in the first place.

Sure a lot of that is on Pop, but how much blame do you think Vince would get if this happened on Monday Night Raw? If nothing else they would have had SOMETHING on screen instead of what we were getting. Air an old match, put up a graphic, put up ANYTHING other than the same commercials over and over.

Yeah TNA put up a video on their Facebook but nothing on their website or Twitter and that’s not something they could blame on Pop. The whole thing was a mess and again, it’s always something with TNA. It comes off as amateurish and that doesn’t help a lot of their major issues, but I’m sure I’m just being a WWE fanboy and not giving them the respect they deserve, whatever that’s supposed to be.

Why do I say they don’t deserve a ton of respect? That Gail Kim graphic. TNA likes to treat their Hall of Fame as something special and to be fair they do a solid job with it, but they can’t even have someone look over this package and say “Hey, that’s wrong.” Do you know how I knew it was wrong? Very simple: I’ve watched TNA long enough to know that Gail has held the title way longer than that.

I get that they probably didn’t have someone from TNA put that together but is it really too much to ask someone to proofread something before it goes out over international television? As usual it comes off as TNA looking amateurish and not paying attention. Of course no one is expecting WWE levels of production and research, but a simple bit of math (or checking Wikipedia) is really not asking too much. If TNA stops doing stupid things like this, people will start treating them like something worthwhile. When these mistakes keep happening over and over again however, they earn the treatment they get.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Eli Drake via DQ when Matt Hardy interfered

Eddie Edwards b. Trevor Lee – Boston Knee Party

Decay b. BroMans, Tribunal and Mahabali Shera/Grado – Abyss chokeslammed Steve onto Grado

Lashley b. Drew Galloway – Side Choke

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It’s that time of year again. It’s time for TNA to pretend that they’re a major wrestling promotion by offering a pay per view that most people aren’t going to watch that is supposed to lead them into their potential war against Smackdown. The main event is allegedly Drew Galloway defending the World Title against Lashley in a TKO or submission only match for reasons that have been forgotten in the weeks of build. Let’s get to it.

We’ll start with the match TNA has announced as the official opener as Trevor Lee defends the X-Division Title against DJZ, Andrew Everett and Eddie Edwards in the match that was easy to predict because this is what the X Title is these days (or these years actually: a match you throw onto a show after a very weak build for the sake of talking about the good old days when people cared about it. The position on the card or whoever fights for the thing doesn’t matter as long as the title is treated as a complete afterthought.

As for the match itself, I’ll go with Edwards getting the belt to set up a match against Helms at Bound For Glory which isn’t going to be the most interesting either. Helms debuted last October and has done a grand total of almost nothing since, other than naming a small stable after himself and teasing an in ring debut that might get some minor attention. Edwards winning makes sense here and could give the title some more false hope of meaning anything going forward.

Dang I’ve been a bit bitter this time. Maybe the next match will be a bit better.

We also have an Al Snow match as his new French team faces the comedy duo of Grado and Mahabali Shera which should be destined for the pre-show. This is a feud that has been built up for a few weeks now and still has no real reason to exist other than to make Al Snow look more important than everyone else in the match. The French guys could be something interesting in the future but I really don’t expect them to be anything more than long term Wolves fodder. I’ll go with them to win here but we’ll likely get a rematch on Impact so Grado and Shera can get their comedit win.

Braxton Sutter has a match against an opponent to be named. I’m sure this will be a squash but Sutter impressed me a lot on Tuesday so I’m fine with this one getting a pay per view spot. It probably won’t get much time but at least it should be entertaining while it lasts.

Back to the title matches as we have Jade defending the Knockouts Title against Sienna. Jade is a really sad case as it’s clear that TNA wants to focus the whole division on Gail Kim but felt the need to take the title off of her for a bit before getting back to her, likely in a big moment at Bound For Glory as she’s entered into the Hall of Fame. Notice how even in a preview for the title match I keep talking about Gail Kim? See how similar it is to TNA? Sienna likely wins here so they can switch the title to Kim in October but at least it would kill off the dead Jade title reign and end its misery.

Decay should easily retain the titles over the BroMans, who are just thrown out there because Beer Money isn’t around anymore. As much a I’ve enjoyed Raquel as the latest eye candy around the pool and in the gym, she’s not going to be enough to get the suddenly much better BroMans another title reign. Decay has actually been a lot of fun lately and I can’t imagine they’re losing the titles to anyone but the Wolves, because they’re the Gail Kim of the tag division.

I’ll go with Drake to keep the King of the Mountain Title as Bram turns into TNA’s hybrid version of Cesaro and Ryback: he might get a quick push but at the end of the day he’s there to put someone over instead of getting himself over. Drake is going to have to cheat as hard as he can to win this thing but he’s been on fire lately and deserves some recognition for all that effort.

Now we get to the big stuff and we’ll start with the third biggest match on the card as Drew Galloway defends the World Title against Lashley in a TKO/Submission only match. Basically the two of them have been brawling for months and somewhere in there Dixie Carter had this darlin idea of mixing MMA and TNA rules because that’s what fans want to see when they watch professional wrestling.

I’ll go with Galloway to retain as Lashley is really just a glorified monster, albeit a rather good one. The stipulations would seem to favor Lashley, even though he made Kurt Angle tap out a few months ago. I’m not really wild on this match and it’s going to feel a little flat as a main event on a show like this. Still though, Galloway retains.

Next up is the match I’ve been looking forward to more than any other on the show as Ethan Carter III gets his rematch with Mike Bennett. These two have had the best feud TNA has produced in a LONG time and most of it is due to having two young guys with different personalities fighting each other. It’s been fun and the matches have worked, making this feud one of the big reasons that TNA has been tolerable. I’m sure this is going to be really entertaining as well and one of the better matches of the night.

That leaves us with the real main event. It won’t go on last but given how TNA has gone over the last few months, it’s very clear that this is the most important match of the night, at least in their eyes. We have Matt Hardy (now looking like a homeless Shakespearean actor) against Jeff Hardy (who may or may not be Willow half the time) in a Full Metal Mayhem match.

I don’t remember the last time a feud has turned me off on a promotion worse than this one has with TNA. They’ve treated this as the be all and end all feud of TNA when it’s really just the same thing we’ve seen time after time. I’m really not even sure why they’re fighting other than Matt is obsessed with getting rid of his brother. One week they were having an I Quit match that ended in a draw and now it’s this completely over the top feud with so bad they’re good vignettes.

I’m sure Jeff is going to do something completely stupid that no one will be able to follow because that’s how TNA works. There are better and more important feuds, but Matt vs. Jeff is their version of Austin vs. Rock for whatever reason and the fans not wanting to stick around really doesn’t matter to TNA. The match should be entertaining but as usual it’s the trip to the dentist office of wrestling: the end result is better than you were expecting but that doesn’t mean it was fun getting here. I’ll actually take Matt to win, likely putting him back in the World Title hunt because he’s a Hardy and that’s where he belongs.

One final note: Gail Kim vs. Maria is off due to Maria breaking her hand. There’s always the chance they’ll swap in Allie to take her place though and if that’s the case, I’ll take Gail to win a good match.

Overall, I really do not want to see Slammiversary, This insanely booked Hardy vs. Hardy feud has just crippled my interest in the show in recent weeks and I don’t see that getting any better anytime soon. If Matt vs. Jeff closes the show over the better or more important match, I’m going to be taking a break from TNA to keep myself from going insane. The show has the potential to be entertaining but TNA needs to nail something special tomorrow night, which I really don’t expect them to do. I mean, it’s not like they ever really do.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: June 7, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s the go home show for Slammiversary and the big question is what the heck Matt and Jeff Hardy are going to do after last week’s bizarre video from inside Matt’s barn with the fake baby and difficult to destroy table. Good or bad, it’s been a hot topic in wrestling ever since so they’re doing something right. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Matt attacking Jeff.

Here’s Matt in the arena to a JEFF IS BETTER chant. Matt talks about how Jeff was jealous of Matt being World Champion so he had to be destroyed. That’s why you won’t see Jeff here tonight, tomorrow or on Sunday. However, before Matt can be whole again, he needs his World Title back. This brings out Drew Galloway, who Matt says would never be champion without Jeff’s help. Matt wants to be added to the main event of Slammiversary but Drew says no. Hardy calls him a coward so Drew agrees to defend the title tonight against Matt.

Madison Rayne vs. Sienna

Winner gets Jade (at ringside here) for the title on Sunday. Allie offers an early verbal distraction, allowing Sienna to get in a few cheap shots from behind. Sienna starts working on the back but can’t hit the AK-47 (that spinning faceplant as dubbed by Dinero). Madison gets in a dropkick but a few shots to the back sets up the AK-47 for the pin and the title shot at 2:33.

Post match Jade saves Madison from a beating. Can we just get the title on Sienna so Gail can get it back in the big special moment at Bound For Glory? You know, for a change of pace.

Maria and Mike Bennett say they’ll win tonight.

Eli Drake is on a mountain and tells Bram to come get him.

Here’s Eli Drake for Fact of Life. Drake’s guest is….himself. Yeah last week he beat Bram because Bram is a dummy. He’ll be champion as long as he wants but tonight he wants to recognize some other champions so here’s Decay. Drake compares them to a basketball team and thinks Rosemary might be the hottest Knockout around under all that makeup. He asks how they’re going to take the BroMans apart on Sunday so Steve talks about all the evil inside them. Abyss says the BroMans aren’t beautiful and they’ll decay at Slammiversary.

Cue the BroMans and Raquel to say they want a fight tonight. A match is teased and it’s Grado and Mahabali Shera coming out because we were starting to get a bit serious. Drake says they should be worried about the Tribunal and presses the DUMMY button a lot. The Tribunal comes out for the big brawl and Bram attacks Drake from behind as we go to a commercial.

Eli Drake/Decay/Tribunal vs. Mahabali Shera/Grado/BroMans/Bram

Shera works on Drake’s arm to start and Eli bails from Bram in a hurry. Abyss comes in and hammers away on Bram before Steve bites his forehead. It’s off to Robbie for a beating from Steve and then another one from Baron Dax as Al Snow continues blowing his whistle. He’s a coach now you see. Basile chinlocks Robbie for a good while but Robbie gets up and brings in Robbie.

A quick BroDown drops Steve but Abyss makes the save as everything breaks down. Robbie gets in a nice dive before Bram starts cleaning house with knees and clotheslines. Grado gets in a Bionic Elbow on Drake but a frog splash only gets two. The referee is distracted though so Drake hits Grado low and does that knee lift/clothesline combo for the pin at 7:50.

Rating: D+. Just too much going on here and nothing had a chance to focus. You had three feuds in one here and that’s a little too much at once. The Tribunal vs. Grado/Shera is one of the weakest feuds in a long time because it revolves around Al Snow. Bram vs. Drake could be good but it’s really not a feud that has any steam going into Sunday. The BroMans are as added on of a set of challengers as I’ve seen in a good while.

Gail Kim does her basic promo about how she wants to show Maria how serious this is. Ethan Carter III talks about how he wants to use the sword of redemption on Bennett this Sunday.

Lashley isn’t pleased with Matt getting a title shot tonight and promises to make sure things go right tonight. Matt says the title is his and Lashley just needs to understand that.

We see Ethan Carter III and Mike Bennett having a weigh-in. A fight broke out of course.

Gail Kim/Ethan Carter III vs. Maria Kanellis/Mike Bennett

Not so fast yet as Maria is going to have Allie take her place. Allie screeches a lot until Ethan actually begs her to stop. Gail comes in to run Allie over but Maria trips her up to give Allie an opening. A double faceplant drops both women though and it’s a double tag to bring in the guys. The 1%er is broken up but Bennett is sent to the floor. Allie goes after Ethan to no avail so the guys run up the ramp. Back inside and Eat Defeat is broken up but Allie’s brainbuster is countered into a small package to give Gail the pin at 4:44.

Rating: C-. Nothing to this one but they’re very wise to have Maria not wrestle as it’s really not her strong suit. Allie is in a weird place as she’s certainly talented in the ring but she’s playing a character who doesn’t have much of a wrestling background. The dynamic is working but Maria is going to have to wrestle at some point.

Post match Sienna runs in and Gail gets a Conchairto on her leg.

Willow hijacks a feed. Great.

X-Division Title: Eddie Edwards vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is defending and has Shane Helms in his corner. Eddie starts the fight on the floor but a Helms distraction lets Trevor stomp him down. A comeback is cut off by another distraction and Trevor stomps away again. Trevor’s atomic drop doesn’t do much as Eddie sends him outside for a plancha followed by a suicide dive.

Back in and Lee uppercuts him in the back of the head before a lifting German suplex gets two. Cue Andrew Everett for a distraction but Lee’s jumping knee only gets two. DJZ comes out for a save but Helms hits Eddie in the head with the title belt to give Lee the pin at 7:09.

Rating: C+. The match was a good technical display but how far have they buried this title? There’s no mention of a title match on Sunday but I’m sure we’ll get some big multi-man match because that’s what the thing is all about. Well at least when they have time to feature the thing between the same people getting four segments a show.

Lashley comes up to Galloway and says he hopes Drew keeps the title tonight. Galloway talks about making Kurt Angle tap out so he’s ready for Lashley.

Gail Kim’s knee is hurt. Uh, thanks as I wouldn’t have gotten that otherwise.

Braxton Sutter vs. Billy Callis

Callis powers him down in to the corner to start but Sutter punches him back. A few kicks to the ribs set up a jumping Downward Spiral to pin Callis at 2:10. Sutter looks good but the name sucks.

Sutter says he’s worked hard to get here and he’s going to take over. That’s no BS.

Willow talks about Jeff Hardy’s war with Matt.

Ethan gives a fired up promo about the showdown with Bennett on Sunday.

We run down the Slammiversary card with Trevor Lee defending the X-Division Title against Andrew Everett, DJZ and Eddie Edwards added. Well that was obvious.

Video on Galloway vs. Lashley.

TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Drew Galloway

Drew is defending. Josh isn’t sure if Matt vs. Jeff will be happening because no one has seen Jeff, though we’ve seen Willow. They quickly head outside with Drew catching a charging Matt and tilt-a-whirl slamming him on the apron. A Side Effect onto the steps puts Matt in control though and a neckbreaker gets two back inside.

Matt bites the champ’s forehead and puts on his guillotine choke. Drew flips him over for the break and it’s time for some chops to make Matt’s chest red. The Celtic Cross drops Matt but he counters a superplex attempt, only to have Drew lift himself up and throw Matt off the top. The Claymore is loaded up but Lashley comes in for the DQ at 6:15.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but again you knew the ending before they even started. Lashley vs. Galloway is a good enough feud but this company is all about the Hardys and everyone knows it. Lashley basically said he was going to interfere here and that’s not the way you want things to go, especially in a big match like this designed to make you want to buy a pay per view.

Post match Galloway and Lashley fight to the back and the lights go out. They come back on and most of the fans (at least in the lower arena) are wearing Willow masks. Cue a bunch of Willows on the stage when the real Willow appears on screen to say Jeff will be free on Sunday to end Matt once and for all. Here’s Jeff to come out and stare at Matt, who is shocked by this for some reason. They brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Why does this company have to do some good stuff to give me hope for their post Slammiversary stretch? The World Title feud and Bennett vs. Carter are both good but sweet goodness that Hardy vs. Hardy feud is death. It’s a rare situation where all you can do is look at it and pretty much be in awe because there’s nothing that needs to be said about it. Yeah the match is probably going to be a spectacle because both guys are insane but the story building up to it is pure dreadful.

The rest of the show felt crammed together but that’s TNA: focus on one or two things and if there’s time for the rest, those stories are just lucky to get the consideration they receive. Slammiversary is going to be a very up and down show that I’m really not looking forward to but there are parts that could be quite good.

Results

Sienna b. Madison Rayne – AK-47

Decay/Eli Drake/Tribunal b. BroMans/Bram/Grado/Mahabali Shera – Clothesline to Grado

Gail Kim/Ethan Carter III b. Mike Bennett/Allie – Small package to Allie

Trevor Lee b. Eddie Edwards – Pin after Shane Helms hit Edwards with the X-Division Title

Braxton Sutter b. Billy Callis – Jumping Downward Spiral

Drew Galloway b. Matt Hardy via DQ when Lashley interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

We’re about a month away from Slammiversary and for the most part the show hasn’t been brought up yet. Save for maybe a mention here or there, nothing yet has been announced. I’m sure you can figure out most of the card by this point though and things are ranging from interesting to not all that great. Let’s get to it.

The announcers talk about Lashley being the new #1 contender to the World Title.

We recap last week’s triple threat main event with Decay beating down Jeff Hardy so Lashley could get the win and the title shot.

Here’s Jeff Hardy to get things going by calling out Decay. Cue the whole team with Abyss talking about how Jeff’s devotion to the fans have made him weak. Steve says the same things so Jeff thinks the only way you can decay is when you die. “And that’s ok because I’m about to kill you.”

Rosemary implies that they were paid off to take out Hardy (well someone has to pay for that face paint) and that person will reveal themselves at the right time (It’s going to be Matt Hardy. Just save time and say it’s Matt Hardy already. Everyone knows it’s going to be Matt Hardy so just say it’s Matt Hardy and get us to the TLC match they’re going to have at Slammiversary, likely in the real main event.).

For now the brawl is on until James Storm comes out for the save. Abyss is willing to destroy both of them for free tonight. Jeff: “Let’s pretend I’m the weatherman.” No Jeff, I don’t want to pretend you’re a weatherman. It’s something about a charismatic storm after the break.

Tag Team Titles: Jeff Hardy/James Storm vs. Decay

Decay is defending and this is Storm’s guaranteed rematch since Roode is gone. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Storm for some clotheslines on Abyss before a Sling Blade gets two. Abyss drops Storm though and chokeslams Steve onto him for a near fall of his own. Storm raises a boot to stop a charging Steve and brings in Jeff for a Twist of Fate on Abyss. The Swanton is loaded up but the lights go out and Willow (Jeff’s old character) appears on stage. Gee, I wonder who is under the mask. A double mist from Decay sets up the Black Hole Slam on Jeff to retain the titles at 6:15.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s going to be Matt Hardy. As usual this is one of those ideas that really doesn’t need to be this in depth but TNA feels the need to build up the Hardy vs. Hardy feud, which really should be the biggest story in the history of wrestling because the Hardys are totally huge deals who have NEVER had a major violent feud before.

Remember how we looked at the triple threat match from last week? Well now we’re going to do that again, for the second time in about twenty minutes.

Drew Galloway doesn’t like Lashley.

Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis were at a Smashing Pumpkins concert last week and hung out with the band after the show.

Here’s Galloway for a chat. Drew is sick of Lashley and wants him out here right now. Lashley comes out and we get the traditional exchange of respectful greetings. We hear about how Lashley got into Kurt Angle’s head, which Drew says is Lashley’s game. He’ll try to get inside your head and then break you down physically, but Drew wants to fight tonight. Lashley says we can wait a week and leaves but Drew is going to fight tonight.

Cue Eli Drake to say it’ll never be over between the two of them. Drake is here to win gold and he’s going to win it all, even if he has to learn to do flips and win the Tag Team Titles on his own. Tonight though he’ll take that World Title and it’s time for a fight with a title match starting after a break.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Eli Drake

Drew is defending of course. Drake starts choking and drops a leg for two before they head outside with Drew firing off chops. Back in and the Future Shock is broken up so Drew settles for a snap powerslam for two. Drake tries to bring in the briefcase but the referee takes it away. Instead it’s the Claymore to the face and the Future Shock to retain the title at 5:42.

Rating: C-. As usual Drake isn’t much beyond competent in the ring but at least we got to hear some of his sweet mic work earlier in the night. I’m really not wild on the World Title being on in the first hour, especially given what is likely going to be happening in the main event slot. This was fine enough though.

Ethan Carter III wants a rematch with Mike Bennett and isn’t leaving the ring until he gets it.

Jade and Gail Kim are in Maria’s office and are going to be facing each other tonight. Maria wants a five star match like the ones that Davey M. guy is always talking about.

Here’s Ethan Carter, who makes sure to soak in some of the cheers before getting to his point. For over two years he was unbreakable, unbendable and unbeatable but now he’s just a man with a vendetta. Therefore, Bennett needs to fetch his wife and get out here to talk business. I’m sure there’s a reason Maria changed outfits between segments. Maria loads up her name but Ethan dubs her Toots McGee and cuts her off.

Mike says he has a huge ego because he was the first man to beat the unbeatable. Ethan wants a rematch right now but apparently Maria has talked to Billy Corgan and there’s a new idea. Apparently Mike has a challenge for Ethan in the form of a road to redemption. We’ll start tonight inside Six Sides of Steel with Ethan facing…..someone.

We look back at Willow distracting Jeff Hardy earlier tonight.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Jade

Jade is defending and Sienna is at ringside. Gail takes it to the mat for an early headlock but Jade comes back with one of her own. A crucifix is countered but Gail counters the counter into an armdrag, followed by an exchange of hurricanranas. They shake hands until Jade gets in a German suplex for two. A cross armbreaker over the ropes has Gail in trouble but Kim sends her outside for a suicide dive. Sienna offers a distraction so Jade can get in a suicide dive of her own, only to have Sienna beat Jade down for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it was clear that they were doing the mirroring story, which almost guaranteed the interference for the DQ ending. It’s a really good idea to have Sienna as an enforcer for Maria because no one is going to buy Maria as someone who can beat Gail or even hang with her. There was nothing to the match of course but there was no reason for there to be one here.

Sienna beats both of them down post match.

We go to Al Snow’s Wrestling Academy with a trainer torturing a student, which is how things used to be. Snow rants about how this is now the exception because it’s all about how the young guys get to come in and live their dreams without putting in any effort. Snow wants to be the Donald Trump of wrestling and make it great again, starting with Grado and Shera.

Ethan wants to know his opponent.

Al Snow vs. Mahabali Shera

Snow gets him into a chase around the ring before grabbing a wristlock back inside. They head outside with Snow pulling out a foreign object for a shot to the throat. Pope: “The Sheik just texted me.” That’s only good for two so Snow chokes with wrist tape for two more. The fans chant for Grado as Snow hits the Snow Plow for two more. Cue Grado to break up another foreign object shot, allowing Shera to hit the Sky High for the pin at 5:27.

Rating: D-. What in the world is the point of this story? They really don’t have anything better to do than doing an Al Snow vs. two comedy guys feud? As in that’s how weak the rosters have gotten at this point? I don’t know who this is supposed to be appealing to, but it’s certainly not me.

Jeff Hardy attacks Willow in the back and beats him down. After a break, Jeff is still at it until two more Willows attack him with the third giving him a Conchairto.

Video on Lashley vs. Galloway next week.

Ethan Carter III vs. ???

Inside a cage and the opponent is……Rockstar Spud. Carter hammers away to start and sends him into the cage a few times. Spud gets in a quick shot and chokes with his belt but he still can’t get out. Back in (after Spud looks like he’s being dragged under the bed in a slasher movie) and Carter keeps beating him up until Spud tries a fast climb. Carter is actually kicked off the cage and Spud drops a top rope elbow for two. The beating continues with Spud going into the cage over and over before gorilla pressing him off the top of the cage. The 1%er puts Spud away at 8:24.

Rating: D. Nothing to this one but it was entertaining enough. This was designed to be a squash so it worked on that front, but there’s only so much you can get out of a match with a clear ending and Spud getting squashed on less than an hour’s notice. It’s a cool idea for a story, even if it’s the same thing Sami Zayn did in NXT in 2014. At least they’re copying good promotions this time.

Overall Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it was almost all about three stories: Jeff Hardy vs. Willow (it’s Matt Hardy), Ethan Carter III vs. Mike Bennett and Lashley vs. Drew Galloway. My problem here is that the weakest of these stories (Hardy vs. Hardy) is getting the most TV time and attention. I wouldn’t be surprised that’s the main event of Slammiversary either, or at least the real main event of the show. This one really didn’t work all that well though and that’s going to be the case until they spread the focus around a little bit.

Results

Decay b. Jeff Hardy/James Storm – Black Hole Slam to Hardy

Drew Galloway b. Eli Drake – Future Shock

Jade b. Gail Kim via DQ when Sienna interfered

Mahabali Shera b. Al Snow – Sky High

Ethan Carter III b. Rockstar Spud – 1%er

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: April 19, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s a big night here as we have the battle of the Hardyz with the right to the last name on the line. In this case it’s an I Quit match over the name, as well as a ladder match with all of the Knockouts at once for control of the division. This isn’t about the title but rather about who runs the Knockouts as a whole. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Hardyz feud and how big tonight is.

Knockouts Ladder Match

Pretty much every active Knockout is involved here. Gail goes after Jade to start as it’s a bunch of brawling all over the place. The Beautiful People (still a thing because of reasons) dropkick a ladder into the Dollhouse’s collective faces, only to have Jade get up and do the Terry Funk ladder around the head spot.

Gail gets pulled down and slapped by Maria, sending them up the ramp in a chase. Cue Rosemary and the Decay to blast Gail with a kendo stick and kidnap her, even further guaranteeing the winner here. The rest of the match stays broken down with Jade clearing out the ring but getting powerbombed off the ladder by Marti. Maria kendo sticks Velvet down and goes up for the contract to win control at 5:13.

Rating: D. Were you expecting anything else? Maria and Gail are the only real characters in the whole division so who else were you going to go with here? Gail being kidnapped is better than having her talk about how serious things need to be for a change and Maria is far more entertaining than the rest of the division so this is the right idea all around. Horrible match of course but Maria isn’t much of a worker.

Drew Galloway is going to call out Lashley right now.

Maria and Mike Bennett are happy.

Decay has Gail in the rafters.

Here’s Drew, with heavily taped ribs, to call Lashley out. Apparently the spears from last week have cracked his ribs and he’s not allowed to wrestle this week. However, the TNA officials didn’t say anything about him fighting tonight. Drew invites Lashley out here to finish the job but it’s Rockstar Spud coming out instead.

Spud says if there was a match right now, he’d easily become the new World Champion. He’s out here to warn us that tonight is the last night that we’re going to see Jeff Hardy. Drew is about to beat him down when Tyrus comes out to say he told us so. Those ribs are a target and that’s what Tyrus likes. He’ll take that title match next week and it doesn’t matter what condition Drew is in. Drew agrees and they shake hands. Spud goes after Drew and it’s a double beatdown on the ribs, including a big splash.

Reby Hardy is holding a camera to film Matt, who promises to make Jeff quit once and for all.

The Decay still has Gail, who Rosemary calls a pawn.

X-Division Title: DJZ vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is defending and none of them get entrances. The champ bails to the floor to start but is almost immediately chopped by both challengers. Edwards is sent into the post so Lee hooks DJZ in a chinlock. That’s broken up with a jawbreaker until Eddie comes back in with a hard shot to Lee. Shane Helms pulls DJZ to the floor but Eddie breaks up a superplex attempt. Shane gets on the apron again though, allowing Andrew Everett to run in and shove Eddie into a jumping knee to retain Trevor’s title at 4:20.

Rating: D. So much for Lee doing anything with the title and all the work that Tigre Uno put into his title reign for that matter. Now it’s all about Shane Helms and a boring string of matches where Lee is a glorified project instead of the focus of the division like he’s supposed to be.

Everett gives Edwards a 630 post match.

Post break Shane and company says that Andrew Everett is the newest member of the Helms Dynasty.

Here are Eric Young and Bram for Eric’s weekly “I’m awesome” speech. He brags about how devastating the piledriver is and says no one can beat him because everyone can try. Young is tired of TNA sucking up to these young punks like the marble mouth Scotsman Drew Galloway.

Therefore, this is the last time you’ll be seeing him because he and Bram quit. Actually not so fast because Bram doesn’t quit. Bram is tired of playing second fiddle to Eric and thinks that King of the Mountain Title would look better around a real man’s waist. Young gets in a quick piledriver and walks off, only to come back and grab a pair of scissors to shave Bram’s beard.

Jeff Hardy thinks the World Title changed Matt and he’ll do whatever he has to do tonight.

Here are Mike Bennett and Maria with something to say. Mike wants all the attention on him because it’s time for a fairy tale. Once upon a time there was a prince with full control over a kingdom and his name was Ethan Carter III (dang I was hoping for Adam Cole). Prince Ethan had it all until one day a white knight called the miracle arrived. Then one day the Prince decided to fight the knight, who took all of the Prince’s power. This is now Bennett’s Kingdom of Miracles but here’s Ethan to interrupt.

Ethan wants the record to show that it was a disqualification win but then he beat Bennett down. He likes a lot of Bennett’s style but at the end of the day, Ethan is just the better man. If Bennett won’t fight him, Ethan will be Mike’s new shadow and beat him down every chance he can. Bennett says that the two of them can fight as many times as they want and he’ll beat Ethan every time because Ethan will keep coming back with another excuse. Ethan talks about how he’s never been pinned or submitted around here but if Mike wants to be the man, face him next week in a No DQ match at Sacrifice. Bennett is game.

Gail wakes up and calls Decay insane.

Here’s Al Snow to talk about how much he can’t stand this group of fans. They’ll watch every week and complain about it on the internet but then they keep watching. Back in the day, not everyone was allowed in the wrestling business and Snow would never pay to see any of these people in the ring. Tonight, he’s giving Mahabali Shera a lesson in what wrestling really means.

Al Snow vs. Mahabali Shera

Al jumps Shera during the entrance and stomps him down before grabbing the mic and calling fans into the ring for a fight. Shera makes his comeback and knocks Snow outside, only to have Al crawl under the ring and come out the other side to deck Shera again. Back in and Snow shrugs off another comeback by hitting Shera in the head with a foreign object. Snow takes forever and covers for the pin at 5:35, giving us a great overhyped cover and celebrating.

Rating: D. Snow is playing the character really well but good night there’s just no hiding the fact that it’s Al Snow getting this kind of time. You would think there would be someone else to take this spot and get a nice run out of it but since TNA can barely run a TV show anymore, the young guys are now doing jobs for people who barely wrestle once a year.

Decay says Gail might be sacrificed.

Eli Drake will have his own talk show next week called Fact of Life.

Here’s Decay with Gail for the plan’s payoff. Rosemary calls us all pawns and puppets and threatens to cut off Gail’s hair. Abyss says the only thing that can save her now is Beer Money, so here are the champs for the save. Storm and Roode have to stay at ringside because Abyss has to issue a challenge for the Tag Team Titles. However, he wants the match to have no rules or regulations, which is called the Valley of Shadows. The match is on and Gail is released.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

I Quit for the Hardy name. Jeff headscissors him out of the corner to start and they clothesline each other a few times. Jeff can’t get the Twist of Fate so he puts on a Figure Four of all things to make Matt scream no a lot. The hold is turned over twice so here’s Rockstar Spud for the save, only to have Jeff powerbomb him with ease. Matt uses the distraction to knock his brother out to the floor where he pelts a chair at Jeff’s head to break up a dive.

We take a break and come back with Matt bending Jeff’s arm around the barricade but getting pulled into the steel for his efforts. They head into the production area with Jeff swinging a pipe to hit Matt’s ring bell before going up towards the rafters. Jeff slides down the railing with a chair to the head but Matt still won’t quit.

Matt gets knocked onto some cases so Jeff can climb a ladder, only to have Matt climb up and hit a Side Effect to drive him though a piece of barricade. Back up and Jeff grabs a choke to knock Matt out without him quitting. That’s fine with Jeff who goes way up on top of the set for a Swanton onto Matt through a table. The match is stopped at about 18:30 as medics take care of them both and we go off the air.

Rating: C+. So yeah, after all that, there’s no finish and we’re likely getting something else out of these two in weeks to come because they’re the real stars of the show. The big dive looked good but I really don’t need to see these two doing stuff like that anymore. It was entertaining fifteen years ago but now it feels like they’re stretching instead of entertaining.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had some good stuff but it was scattered throughout a lot of weak action and far too little wrestling. You really should be able to get in more than a quick ladder match, a nothing triple threat, an Al Snow win and a main event without a finish. It really doesn’t help that the focus is on Matt vs. Jeff and Tyrus is #1 contender. Yeah there’s interesting stuff otherwise but I need WAY more than that to keep me entertained for two hours a week. It’s a watchable enough show but parts of it are going to put you to sleep.

Results

Maria Kanellis won a ladder match by pulling down the contract

Trevor Lee b. DJZ and Eddie Edwards – Jumping knee to Edwards’ chest

Al Snow b. Mahabali Shera – Foreign object to the head

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy went to a no contest

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Impact Wrestling
Date: April 12, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

Things have picked up a little bit in recent weeks around here after a strong showing last week. The big story continues to be the imminent Tyrus title shot but first we need to get through Matt vs. Jeff, which is still the biggest feud in the promotion despite Drew Galloway being World Champion. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Matt Hardy losing to Drew Galloway last week.

Here’s the Matt Hardy Brand to open things up. Matt insults the fans that paid to see him (even though they don’t charge for tickets) and says every dollar in his bank accounts was built on the Hardy name. However, there’s a ball and chain around his ankle and it’s named Jeff Hardy. Jeff comes out and says the title is bigger than any one of them because it means who is the best in this business.

Matt claims that he’s carried Jeff over the years and has he’s tired of seeing Jeff ruin their name. Therefore, Matt wants Jeff to go off and do his paintings or music or whatever and leave the Hardy name behind forever. Jeff says no to a match over the name (seriously) but the only thing that really scares him is Reby’s crazy genes infecting the family tree. Apparently the fight is on.

Tag Team Titles: Beer Money vs. BroMans vs. Decay vs. Eric Young/Bram

Beer Money is defending and this is one fall to a finish. It’s a huge brawl to start with Storm heading outside to ride around on the Boozer Cruiser and hit Bram low. Back in and Bram takes the double suplex which means it’s time for the opening bell. It gets annoying to have all that brawling before the match actually starts with none of it really counting.

Anyway Young works on Roode to start before Abyss tags himself in, only to chokeslam his partner onto Bobby for two. Young comes in again and decks Storm but walks into a backdrop for two. Robbie gets the tag instead and it’s a BroDown to set up the Adonis Lock on Eric with Abyss making the save. Everything breaks down and Robbie dives onto Bram and Steve. Young hits Bram by mistake and it’s the Last Call on Eric to retain the titles at 4:54.

Rating: D+. The match was watchable enough but it was a lot of chaos for the sake of Bram and Young screwing up again. I could go for them just splitting the team and giving Bram the title already as it’s not like there’s much left for the title anyway. Maybe Bram can get a small rub off of it but this isn’t doing him anything. Decay and the BroMans were just window dressing here.

Matt comes up to Jeff and says the match is on for next week but he wants it to be an I Quit match. Jeff has no problem with this but wants a tag match tonight with the stipulations on the line. If Matt and Tyrus win then it’s I Quit. If Jeff and his mystery partner win, it’s Full Metal Mayhem. So now the main event is a Hardy vs. Hardy match to determine the stipulations of the next Hardy vs. Hardy match.

Eddie Edwards has been attacked in the back.

Here’s Maria to say it’s time for the genesis of the new Knockouts division. Maria asks Jade to come out here and hand over the title to its rightful owner. That’s not cool with Jade because the champ calls the shot in the division, but here’s Gail Kim to interrupt. We get the traditional “you have to work for this” thing before Maria laughs at the Knockouts and how they’re all barking at her.

This brings out Rebel and Marti Belle to say they run this place, followed by the Beautiful People with Velvet saying they’re the OG Knockouts. Madison says she knows how to lead, which Velvet doesn’t quite get. Maria thinks the division needs a leader so here’s Billy Corrgan to again explain that he has authority around here. He’s been talking to Dixie and in a week there’s going to be one big match over leadership of the division. For tonight though, Madison gets a title shot. Everyone brawls and Maria leaves.

EC3 doesn’t think Mike Bennett is a miracle but he’s certainly talented. Tonight though, Bennett takes a beating.

Here are Shane Helms and Trevor Lee with something to say. Apparently Lee was going to fight Eddie Edwards but that surprise attack has changed plans. There’s a replacement though.

Trevor Lee vs. DJZ

Non-title for whatever reason. DJZ starts fast and snaps off a headscissors before hitting a big flip dive over the top to take Trevor out. A tornado DDT looks to put Lee away but Shane offers a distraction, allowing Trevor to load up his fisherman’s DDT. DJZ is ready though and grabs a small package for the pin at 2:59.

Post match Edwards runs out to save DJZ from a post match beatdown.

Bennett promises to beat Carter tonight.

Drew Galloway will be Jeff’s partner tonight.

Mike Bennett vs. Ethan Carter III

Carter takes him down and hammers away to start before cranking on the arm for some chops. They head outside with Bennett not being able to suplex him onto the ramp, only to have Carter give him one instead. Back in and Maria rakes the eyes while Bennett chokes on the ropes to give Mike his first real advantage.

Carter fights back but Bennett grabs the ropes to block an Irish whip. A jumping Downward Spiral gets two for Ethan and the TK3 gets the same with Maria having to put Mike’s foot on the rope. Ethan gives chase but walks into a cutter for no cover. Instead Bennett brings in a chair, which Carter takes away and uses on Bennett for the DQ at 7:28.

Rating: C+. This was all about setting up a rematch and there’s nothing wrong with that. Carter and Bennett have some chemistry together and Bennett is going to be a good choice for a main event player, assuming he gets past the whole Miracle thing, which really isn’t working for me. At least the match was good and the rematch should be even better.

We look back at Al Snow beating down Mahabali Shera and Grado two weeks back.

Snow is willing to apologize tonight.

Al Snow is in the ring to talk about what he did two weeks ago and apologize. All he wanted to do was make sure that some young talent paid some dues. Cue Shera to get in Snow’s face and yell about how his friend is in the hospital. Snow says he’s been doing this a long time and it’s all he knows. Back in his day, you had to earn your way in here and that’s what he wanted to happen again.

When he was 19, he was beaten in the back of the head so many times that he went blind in one eye for over an hour. Snow was trying to relive those old days and maybe it was out of jealousy but he’s going to pay for all of Grado’s medical bills. Al agrees to try and do better and offers to mentor Grado and Shera. That’s fine with Shera and they go to leave, only to have Snow send him into the steps over and over. The segment worked well enough but was there NO ONE besides Al Snow that could play this role? No one at all?

Drew is getting ready when Tyrus comes in and suggests that Drew get a bodyguard. Bad things happen to good people and he can have his title shot anytime he wants, which makes him very dangerous.

Knockouts Title: Jade vs. Madison Rayne

Madison is defending and gets an early two count off a rollup. Jade comes back with a hard shot to the face and something like a reverse DDT for two. A release northern lights suplex gets the same on Madison but she comes back with a kick to the head for a breather. Some hard chops have Jade in trouble and a discus forearm sets up a loud screech. Jade shrugs them off though and avoids a high cross body, followed by an STO to retain at 5:15.

Rating: C. This was fine and that’s all it needed to be. Rayne is a good choice for a first challenge and gets to put Jade over as the new champion. The division and the title both needed a breath of fresh air after Gail’s latest title reign and Jade is different enough to make it work. It wasn’t a great match or anything close to it but it did everything it was supposed to do.

Matt Hardy/Tyrus vs. Jeff Hardy/Drew Galloway

If Matt’s team wins, next week is an I Quit match but if Jeff’s team wins, next week is Full Metal Mayhem. Tyrus and Jeff get things going but things quickly break down with Drew and Jeff cleaning house. Drew isn’t quite Jeff as he tries some Poetry in Motion but it’s enough to have them in control as we take a break. Back with Matt pounding Drew down in the corner, followed by Tyrus stomping on Drew’s hand.

We hit the camel clutch for a bit, followed by a belly to belly for two on the champ. Drew avoids a charge in the corner and it’s a double tag to the brothers Hardy. Jeff beats Matt down with ease and gets two off a backslide. Matt rolls away before the Swanton is launched though so Jeff dives onto Tyrus instead. A quick Claymore drops Tyrus but Reby slips Matt a hammer, which goes upside Jeff’s chin. Somehow this doesn’t kill him so Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate for the pin at 11:54.

Rating: C-. They really need to cut out these screwy endings, even though they had to do something nefarious here to give us the I Quit match. You don’t want the champion losing so Jeff taking the fall is the only option. I get the idea of not wanting it to be clean, but you can’t hold his foot or use the ropes or something? The only option is HIT HIM WITH A HAMMER? There’s no in between?

Post match the losers are in the ring when Lashley comes in for some spears to Galloway.

Overall Rating: C. This was watchable enough but they need to find some more fresh blood in the main event. Matt vs. Jeff over the Hardy name really isn’t enough to make me care about whatever they’re doing. Lashley vs. Galloway for the title is interesting and Bennett vs. Carter should be good. In other words, this would be setting up a good pay per view card but that’s not what they have around here so we’re likely getting a big TV taping instead. Lucky us.

Results

Beer Money b. Decay, BroMans and Eric Young/Bram – Last Call to Young

DJZ b. Trevor Lee – Small package

Mike Bennett b. Ethan Carter III via DQ when Carter used a chair

Jade b. Madison Rayne – STO

Matt Hardy/Tyrus b. Jeff Hardy/Drew Galloway – Twist of Fate to Jeff

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2016
Location: MEN Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re still in England and Lockdown is in a week (not that TNA has bothered to tell us that just yet of course), likely with the returning Ethan Carter III challenging Matt Hardy in one of the new champ’s first title defenses. Other than that we may have more issues between Matt and Dixie Carter over Jeff Hardy’s future. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Tag Team Title situation with Decay stealing the Wolves’ belts and daring the champs to come get them in a Monster’s Ball this week.

Another recap shows us the ending of last week’s show with Ethan Carter III returning to chase off Matt Hardy.

Ethan comes up to Dixie in the back and says it’s now his mission to take the title back from Hardy. Dixie tells him that the rematch will be next week in Lockdown inside the steel cage. That’s fine with Ethan, but tonight he has something personal to take care of.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Ethan in the arena with something to say. He walked into this company two and a half years ago with a chip on his shoulder and he’s beaten everyone in front of him save for one name. That one man is all that matter to him right now and that is Matt Hardy. The one word that matters right now is rematch and Matt is going to be locked inside a cage with all of Ethan’s rage and vengeance.

Right now though, Ethan’s fists need to start punching someone and he can’t think of anyone better than Tyrus. Maybe Tyrus is breast feeding Maxel Hardy but get out here right now and fight. Tyrus comes out to say Ethan doesn’t want this. However, Tyrus thinks Ethan is afraid to be alone and he got to a new level with Tyrus. They were close enough for Tyrus to call him boss, but now Tyrus knows everything about him. Ethan asks if Tyrus is done and now the brawl is on.

Tyrus takes over and punches Carter up the aisle, only to be sent into the barricade a few times. This brings out Matt for the double beatdown and it’s time for a chair. Ethan fights both of them off though and cleans house with a chair. Matt issues the challenge for the tag match later tonight.

Here are Eric Young and Bram with something to say. Young asks if there’s anyone in the crowd tough enough to take his King of the Mountain Title from him. One person who certainly won’t be doing it is Jeff Hardy, but this brings out Beer Money. OF COURSE IT BRINGS OUT BEER MONEY because we haven’t had this story go on long enough yet. Storm accepts the challenge and we’re ready to go.

King of the Mountain Title: Eric Young vs. James Storm

Young is defending and gets taken down in a hurry with Storm sending him into the corner. Storm gets sent to the floor though, allowing Eric to take over back inside. An elbow to the face gets two and a neckbreaker gets the same. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Storm fights up with some clotheslines. Roode intercepts Bram and all four guys brawl to the floor for the double countout at 4:07.

Rating: D. Sweet goodness I can’t stand Eric Young. I don’t remember being more miserable when someone comes on my TV. I get that he’s been around for a long time but this feud with Bobby Roode and now Beer Money I guess has been going on for years now. There’s no reason left for them to fight other than “well they’ve been fighting for a while now.” Find something else for them to do or stop putting them on TV because it’s been old for a long time.

All four fight into the crowd.

Drew Galloway offers to be Ethan’s partner. They have common goals but Ethan wants to stand alone tonight.

Back from a break and THEY’RE STILL FIGHTING. Just put them in the cage match like you know you’re going to next week so we can hopefully end this feud already. We cut away as the fighting continues.

Here are Mike Bennett and Maria to discuss the people that have come across Mike so far. Kurt Angle hit him from behind and then ran away. Drew Galloway is stuck with a ticking time bomb called a briefcase. Tonight though, Mike wants to face one of the UK’s own.

Mike Bennett vs. Mandrews

Mandrews takes him down with an early armdrag and we’re already at the first shooting star, only to have Mike raise his knees. We hit the early chinlock for a few moments before Mike flapjacks him for two. Mandrews comes back with a spinning DDT and a standing corkscrew moonsault for two of his own. Bennett crotches him on top and hits a hanging Diamond Cutter, followed by the Miracle in Progress for the pin at 3:46.

Rating: D+. I’m not wild on the Miracle gimmick but at least he looked more dominant for a change. Bennett could go somewhere, assuming he can actually outlive Matt Hardy’s World Title reign. Not much to see here but it’s always fun to watch a pest like Mandrews get beaten down for a bit.

Post match Bennett keeps pounding on Mandrews until Drew Galloway makes the save.

Rosemary talks about leaving the Wolves lying in a pool of their own blood with nothing to wear. Abyss promises that she’ll be the most beautiful woman at the ball. The Decay is in a cage when someone comes up to say he remembers Rosemary. He blows a kiss and says he’ll see them soon. Apparently that would be British wrestler Jimmy Havoc.

Post break and Bennett beats down Galloway and Mandrews in the back.

Odarg the Great (notice the spelling) is coming.

Matt Hardy and Tyrus threaten Rockstar Spud to not be Ethan’s partner later.

We look back at Angle vs. Lashley from last year.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Decay

Monster’s Ball (street fight) with the Wolves defending. They brawl in the aisle to start and the weapons are quickly brought in as we take an early break. Such a stupid WWE move. Back with the Wolves in control and grabbing a ladder. Abyss’ ankle gets caught in the ladder but Rosemary mists Davey to break up the top rope double stomp, allowing Abyss to pelt a chair at Eddie, knocking him down through a table.

Abyss pulls out Janice and before I can type “and he swings it, only to get it caught in the turnbuckle pad because HE ALWAYS GETS IT CAUGHT IN THE TURNBUCKLE PAD”, he swings it, only to get it caught in the turnbuckle pad because HE ALWAYS GETS IT CAUGHT IN THE TURNBUCKLE PAD. That means more violence as Abyss piles up chairs until Eddie gets up for the save, setting up sunset bomb onto the chairs.

Steve and Davey get back in and the champs hit the clown in the back with a chair, setting up a top rope double stomp. Abyss starts cleaning house and brings out the bag of tacks. Pope: “We always think it’s the tacks but you never know!” Yeah Pope we do know, because it’s always the tacks. Eddie kicks Abyss out to the floor, allowing Davey to suicide dive the monster into the barbed wire board. Steve blasts Eddie with a chair off camera and puts his head inside a chair.

Rosemary gets in the ring to break up something like a Conchairto though as she pours the tacks (yeah they were tacks, because they’re always tacks) onto Eddie’s head first. The Conchairto misses though because of course it does, allowing Eddie to use Janice to knock a chair into Steve’s face. Richards kisses Rosemary (there’s some sexual assault for you) but it’s a trick to suck the mist out of her mouth. I’m not sure if that’s brilliant or ridiculous. Whatever they call Chasing the Dragon onto the chairs puts Steve away at 14:33.

Rating: C+. Much like almost everything else on this show, I’ve seen this so many times before. Like I said a few times here, you knew it was going to be tacks because it’s always tacks. You knew Abyss was going into the barbed wire board because he always goes into the barbed wire board. Finally you knew Janice wasn’t hitting anyone because it never does. The match is still entertaining, but they haven’t changed the formula in so long that it’s beyond stale. Oh and thanks for coming Decay. Can we just release Steve now?

Spud offers to be Ethan’s partner but Ethan still wants to do it alone.

Gail Kim/Madison Rayne vs. Jade/Marti Bell

Speaking of things we’ve seen time after time. It’s a brawl to start with Marti scoring off a Samoan Drop to Kim, followed by a running flip neckbreaker for two. Gail gets beaten down a little more until Jade runs into a boot in the corner. The hot tag brings in Madison as everything breaks down. Jade’s dive is broken up by Gail’s forearm, allowing Madison to roll Marti up for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. So? The feud is just going to continue because the Dollhouse has the numbers advantage and for some reason they’ll beat everyone down and re-establish dominance that they lose again the next week because they almost never win anything. I’m sure a former Beautiful People member will make the save and set up a six Knockout cage match that only TNA’s hardest of hardcore fans will find interesting because that’s how the Knockouts work.

Post match, the Dollhouse beats down Gail and Madison until Velvet Sky makes the save. Velvet wants Lethal Lockdown next week.

Mahabali Shera is back and has a new friend in Odarg the Great, who says he’s a good guy. It’s clearly Grado as the mask is similar to Vader’s old style.

Eric Young/Bram and Beer Money are still fighting in the back. Pope: “They’ll get tired in a while.” The villains finally start walking away but Beer Money tells the cameraman that they want a cage match next week. So I’m supposed to care about a ten minute match after they just fought for over an hour?

Jesse Godderz/Eli Drake vs. Mahabali Shera/Odarg the Great

Well he was coming an hour ago, then he appeared and now he’s having a match. He even comes out to Grado’s music and doing Grado’s strut, though he’s billed from Parts Unknown. Pope even gets in a Midnight Rider reference as the match begins without a bell that I could hear. Shera drop toeholds Drake down and ties Eli’s arms up to make him do the dance.

Jesse has some better luck by taking Shera to the mat and setting up something like a Demolition Decapitator. Back up and the hot tag brings in Odarg to clean house as everything breaks down. A Sky High gets two on Jesse as Drake goes after the mask. Odarg pulls it off instead and rolls Drake up (looking him right in the face) for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: D+. Maybe it’s how much I’ve disliked this show but I had a good time with this. I can go with comedy much easier when everyone is in on the joke and they’re just having fun with it. I mean, it’s not like the Feast or Fired briefcase has had strict rules before so this is hardly a stretch. If nothing else it’s the most I’ve ever been entertained by Grado and it gives the talented Drake something to do.

Drake’s shocked look post match is great.

Post break Eli wants Grado at Lockdown but Odarg comes up to say he’ll be Drake’s opponent.

Matt Hardy/Tyrus vs. Ethan Carter III

Handicap to start. The fans are doing this awkward wave to Carter’s music and it’s really not working. Tyrus starts for the team but gets knocked back into the corner for an early beating. A t-bone suplex sends Carter flying though and we take a break. Back with Matt dropping a middle rope elbow to Ethan but Rockstar Spud comes out to be Carter’s partner. Ethan scores with a clothesline but stays in to fight Matt as the fans want Spud. A dropkick puts Matt down and the hot tag brings in Spud who actually doesn’t turn on Carter.

There goes the bowtie but Spud beats on Tyrus instead, allowing Matt to take him down with something like Big Show’s Final Cut. The Heart Punch puts Spud down but Tyrus misses a charge in the corner, allowing Spud to grab an Underdog. The real hot tag brings in Carter to face Hardy as everything breaks down. Ethan dives at both guys but they fail to catch him, leaving Carter to crash in an ugly looking landing. Back in and the Side Effect gets two on Ethan, followed by a Twist of Fate to Spud. The 1%er puts Matt away at 12:54.

Rating: C. Just a main event tag match here but I don’t buy the idea of Spud being fine with Carter less than a year after everything that happened. If there’s one thing TNA does well, it’s remember continuity like that so, as predictable as it might be, I’m kind of hoping Spud turns on Carter next week.

Overall Rating: D. This show got better in the second hour but the first hour was one of the least interesting (which is far different than worst) offerings from TNA that I’ve seen in a long time. It showcased so many of their problems: acting like WWE, setting up someone like Decay and then having them lose in their first big match and above all else, a bunch of stuff that we’ve seen before. That’s where TNA loses me: I really have no interest in seeing the same tropes that they’ve covered just a year or so ago. This got better later on, but it really had nowhere to go but up.

Results

James Storm vs. Eric Young went to a double countout

Mike Bennett b. Mandrews – Miracle in Progress

Wolves b. Decay – Brainbuster onto a chair to Steve

Odarg the Great/Mahabali Shera b. Eli Drake/Jesse Godderz – Rollup to Drake

Ethan Carter III/Rockstar Spud b. Tyrus/Matt Hardy – 1%er to Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: December 9, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s week #10 of the World Title Series and we’re down to the final eight. In theory that means we’re getting the quarterfinals tonight, though I’m not sure if that’s going to be enough to fill in a full two hour show. There’s still no date announced for the finals but they have four weeks left on Destination America and only three rounds of the tournament to go. Let’s get to it.

We get the double preview via voiceover and the announcers.

Video on Mahabali Shera vs. Lashley.

TNA World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Mahabali Shera vs. Lashley

The announcers can’t remember the name of Shera’s dance. Can’t they just go outside because IT’S SWEEPING THE NATION??? Shera takes over with a hard clothesline and some stomping in the corner to start. Lashley remembers that he’s fighting a guy who is only know for a lame dance that is sweeping the nation, minus the announcers’ booth of course, and powerbombs him out of the corner.

Back from an early break Lashley in control on the floor and high fiving fans. Lashley tries a dive off the apron but Shera catches him in mid air (ok that’s good) and slams him on the floor. They head back inside for more clotheslines from Shera before he drops Lashley off a gorilla press. The Sky High is countered though and a spear sends Lashley to the semi-finals at 10:27.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here and thank goodness they went with Lashley instead of the glorified rookie because they thought they were going to India before that got screwed up again because of whatever reason they’re claiming. Lashley is the much better option here though I wouldn’t put the title back on him again. TNA needs something fresh on top right now and being back where they were a year ago with Lashley as champion around the time they head to a new network isn’t the right idea.

The announcers talk about Lashley a bit.

Video on Eric Young and Tigre Uno’s paths to the final eight.

Video on Awesome Kong vs. Jesse Godderz from last week.

Godderz promises to show what the Man is capable of tonight.

TNA World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Tigre Uno vs. Eric Young

Before the match, Young calls Tigre stupid like the rest of the fans. He wants Tigre to leave like the coward that he is and Tigre teases going, only to come back in and take Eric out instead. A hurricanrana into a rollup gets two for Tigre but Eric drops him with a hard shot. There’s a backbreaker for two from Eric and we take a break.

Back with Young still in control as Josh shills merchandise. A shot to the ribs gets two and Eric throws him to the floor. Young chokes some more back inside and tries a moonsault for no apparent reason, resulting in a big crash and burn. Tigre hurricanranas him down and drops a top rope legdrop between the legs for two. A top rope hurricanrana gets the same but Eric grabs the piledriver to advance at 11:42.

Rating: D+. This was another obvious ending, which is a major problem with this tournament as a whole. Young would be the worst choice of the realistic contenders for the title but he’s fine as a guy to lose in the semi-finals. Tigre looked like a jobber here though, which is exactly what was expected when he fought against the adults outside of the X-Division.

The announcers recap Young winning and preview Jesse Godderz vs. Matt Hardy.

Matt Hardy is ready for Jesse, who is going to take a Twist of Fate and get pinned as one more step towards getting the title back.

Eric Young says these have been warmups for what he’s going to do to everyone else in this tournament.

TNA World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Jesse Godderz vs. Matt Hardy

Matt grabs a headlock to start until Jesse shoves him away. Josh tries to explain the situation that got us to this tournament and it really still doesn’t make sense. A few slams drop Jesse and it’s time for Matt to pose a bit. They head outside with Jesse driving him into the steps and nailing a dropkick as we take a break.

Back with Jesse working on the back (smart) with forearms and a bearhug. A slow motion powerslam gets two for Godderz and it’s back to the bearhug on the mat with feet on the ropes. Back up and Matt hits a quick Side Effect (with very little elevation) followed by a sleeper drop. Well at least it’s different than the four moves he usually uses.

A throw off the top sets up a middle rope elbow to the back of Jesse’s head for two. The Twist of Fate is broken up and a dropkick gets two for Jesse. Back up and an enziguri (kind of) sends Matt into the corner but the Adonis Lock is broken up. The Twist of Fate sends Matt to the final four at 17:22.

Rating: C. They had to have one longer match like this and this was one of their best option out of the four matches they had tonight. Godderz was a glorified jobber here but it was nice to see him doing some good stuff. He’s gone from a total goof to a pretty decent midcarder, which is more than most people expected from him. Good enough match here but longer than it needed to be.

The announcers talk about Matt.

It’s time for a sitdown interview with Dixie freaking Carter where she gives her thoughts on the major events of the year: Drew Galloway debuting was cool, Ethan Carter III is family but he was kind of a jerk, Matt Hardy vacating the title was sad, the tournament was awesome and let the Knockouts have a chance to be the best. The big news here: the semi-finals and finals are going to be on the live show on January 5. So wait, what are they doing for the next THREE WEEKS?

Long recap of the ending of Bound For Glory and the tournament up to this point.

Next week it’s Group Future 4 vs. Group X-Division in an eight man tag. Also Eddie Edwards vs. Rockstar Spud vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Bobby Roode. These will be the first non-tournament matches in nearly three months.

We recap the night so far.

Quick video on Ethan Carter III vs. Davey Richards.

TNA World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Ethan Carter III vs. Davey Richards

Before the match, Ethan makes fun of Davey’s Wolves’ howl. Richards says he doesn’t have a rich aunt or a bad tan, but he has a bunch of fans who are going to howl with him. Ethan grabs an armdrag to start but Davey comes back with a wristlock. A dropkick puts Ethan on the floor, only to have a Tyrus distraction cause Davey to charge into a forearm. We hit a chinlock for a few seconds and an elbow to the mat (called the face) gets two on Davey. Tyrus gets in a cheap shot on the floor (where is Eddie anyway?) and we take a break.

Back with Ethan whipping Davey hard into the corner and putting on the chinlock. Davey comes back with some kicks in the corner, only to miss a charge and crash face first into the buckle. They slug it out until Davey gets low bridged out to the floor, setting up a suicide dive to Tyrus and two in a row to Ethan. A German suplex gets two for Davey but he misses the top rope stomp, setting up a TKO for two.

Ethan goes up top for some reason but gets headbutted several times, setting up a superplex into a regular suplex for two. Both finishers are broken up and Ethan tries a rollup, only to get caught in a triangle choke. Ethan lifts him up and flips him over, giving us a weird edit into a TKO. The 1%er sends Ethan to the final four at 16:37.

Rating: B. This was the best match of the night by a mile with the hot segment right before the finish. The ending was totally obvious but at least we had a good match before we got to the ending. Richards clearly wasn’t the one that was going take Carter down but he got things moving here instead of just sitting around waiting for the obvious finish.

Here are the semi-finals:

Ethan Carter III

Lashley

Matt Hardy

Eric Young

Overall Rating: C-. This show’s problem can be summed up in one line: the winners were never in doubt. Mahabali Shera, Tigre Uno, Jesse Godderz and Davey Richards are not going to be in the final four of a World Title tournament no matter how you look at it. The wrestling was fine, but the endings were never in doubt and that’s rarely a good idea for a full show.

The semifinals are coming up in four weeks, but that brings us to the biggest problem: what are they going to do to fill time? Two matches were announced for next week but I have no idea what they’re going to do unless it’s Best Of shows. You knew these scheduling issues were coming but I didn’t think it was going to be this bad. This wasn’t a bad show but it felt like a lot of waiting around before we got to the obvious, which made the whole thing feel long.

Results

Lashley b. Mahabali Shera – Spear

Eric Young b. Tigre Uno – Piledriver

Matt Hardy b. Jesse Godderz – Twist of Fate

Ethan Carter III b. Davey Richards – 1%er

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 2, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

We’re in week nine of the World Title tournament and it’s finally time to get to the round of sixteen, meaning single elimination matches. The brackets were revealed last week and we’ve been promised to have this round done tonight. In theory the finals will be held at the live Impact on January 5 but that hasn’t been confirmed. Let’s get to it.

Quick preview of the round of sixteen starts things off.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: DJZ vs. Ethan Carter III

DJZ goes right after him with some rollups for early near falls but DJZ knees him in the ribs to stop that cold. Carter gets sent to the floor for a suicide dive though with Tyrus not giving him much of a heads up. Back in and DJZ gets sent outside as well, allowing Tyrus to run him over with a headbutt to the chest. Dinero: “Josh I don’t know if you’ve ever been hit in the head with a coconut before.” A chinlock doesn’t get Carter very far so DJZ comes back with his fast paced offense, capped off by the tornado DDT for two. DJZ’s hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb, followed by the 1%er to give Carter the pin at 6:28.

Rating: D+. Watchable match here with the ending never in doubt. It’s nice to finally get through some of these matches so we can get rid of the lower level names and get down to the bigger matches. I’m glad they kept this one short as the match wasn’t good enough to make me care about seeing it go any longer but it didn’t overstay its welcome.

Gail Kim is ready for Tigre Uno because she’s so proud to be one of the sixteen WRESTLERS in this tournament. Gail, you’re great in the ring, beautiful and very talented, but SWEET GOODNESS you are so boring.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Gail Kim vs. Tigre Uno

Tigre isn’t sure what to do to start so Gail kicks him in the ribs. Thankfully Pope mentions that these two are both champions, even though there are no belts in sight. Tigre goes with some basic wrestling including a front facelock but Gail comes right back with a spinning cross body. Eat Defeat is broken up so Gail settles for a Black Widow. Tigre powers her out to the floor for a plancha but Gail snaps off a hurricanrana back inside. Gail’s normal offense including the Figure Four around the post has him in trouble, only to have Tigre sit down on a sunset flip for the pin at 5:32.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. Gail was built up as a potential star throughout the last two months but then she just loses here in five minutes. I’m glad that Tigre won because he’s been a solid X-Division Champion and it would suck to see him lose really early on, but did they really need to build Gail up as something only to have her lose that easily?

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Bram vs. Davey Richards

The winner gets Carter. Bram shoves him down to start and Davey might need to change strategy. With the arm work not getting him anywhere, Davey takes it to the floor for some kicks to the chest. They look good but don’t seem to have a lot of effect as Bram takes him up into a fireman’s carry to drop him face first onto the steps. Davey comes back with a drop toehold to send Bram into the steps as most of this match has been on the floor.

A double stomp from the steps keeps Bram in trouble and Davey takes him back inside for a northern lights suplex. Josh thinks Davey winning would be an upset as the top rope double stomp gets two on Bram. An F5 plants Davey and Bram yells a lot. The Brighter Side of Suffering is countered into a small package to give Davey the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C. This wasn’t too bad but Richards still doesn’t do anything for me as a singles guy. His passive aggressive promos probably have a lot to do with it as he seems like he’s going out of his way to be nice, which really makes him more boring than anything else. The same problem that the tournament has had throughout is still here though: these guys are just doing moves to each other and there’s no personal issue, making it a lot harder to get invested.

Eli Drake isn’t worried about Mahabali Shera.

Video on Shera’s success so far.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Mahabali Shera vs. Eli Drake

Josh talks about Shera wanting to make it to the semifinals but the part where he says “in Mumbai, India” is edited out. An early clothesline puts Drake on the floor and it’s time to dance. Back in and Shera shrugs off some kicks to the chest and scores with more clotheslines. Sky High eliminates Drake at 3:12.

Rating: D. Well that was quick and thankfully they kept the dancing to a minimum, but good night I’m not getting behind this dancing schnook. He’s gotten better but at the end of the day he’s a guy who pops his shoulders and does one good move. For some reason that makes him one of the top eight wrestlers in the company? Really? It’s clear that they were putting him in this spot because of the India tour but like so many other things TNA plans, they couldn’t get it to work. Oh wait there were “security concerns”. Right. Maybe they can get the Los Angeles Coliseum. I hear Wrestlemania VII is over now.

Matt Hardy says he’ll win.

Pope and Josh pick the remaining matches.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Bobby Roode vs. Matt Hardy

Feeling out process to start with both guys getting in some low level offense. They head outside with Matt clotheslining the post to give Roode a target back inside. Roode cranks on the arm and grabs a Hennig necksnap but stops to yell at the fans. Is he a heel again? The Crossface doesn’t stay on long and Matt comes back with a Side Effect for two. It’s back to the Crossface but Matt is up again, setting up the Twist of Fate to advance at 6:36.

Rating: C. How am I supposed to feel anything about this? Roode worked on the arm for a few minutes and then Matt did his finisher to advance. That’s this tournament in a nutshell: two people have a match and one of them wins. There’s nothing more or less than that because we don’t have time to fit in any emotion or stories so this is what you’re getting, like it or not.

Drew Galloway is ready.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Awesome Kong vs. Jesse Godderz

The winner gets Matt Hardy. Before the match, Jesse implies that Kong wants to do a different kind of wrestling with him. As stupid as this is, it’s the first time all night where we’ve had anything more than “I want the title and I’ll win.” Jesse puckers up and gets punched in the mouth as Kong starts in a hurry.

A splash in the corner crushes Jesse and three straight slams send him to the floor. Godderz says Kong’s one night in Heaven is off so Kong throws him into the steps. Josh isn’t sure if this would be an upset as Kong throws Jesse back inside. Kong misses a splash though and gets rolled up with a handful of trunks for the pin at 3:12.

Rating: D. You knew this was coming didn’t you? I mean, the Knockouts advancing might have been interesting and something worth seeing so that had to be crushed in the first round at the hands of Tigre Uno (not as bad) and a comedy goof in Jesse Godderz. To be fair though, Kong wasn’t going to be able to do much due to all her injuries anyway but this was another option that could have been interesting going nowhere in this way too long tournament.

The announcers recap the night so far.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Kenny King vs. Eric Young

The winner gets Tigre Uno. King grabs the arm to start before grabbing a headlock to keep Young in trouble. Back up and Eric sends him to the floor for an attempt at a countout, only to have King do a handstand into a kick to the head from the apron. That earns him a forearm to put him outside again. King realizes that going toe to toe isn’t working so he comes back in with a springboard clothesline and a bad looking spinebuster for two. Not that it matters as the piledriver sends Young to the next round at 6:22.

Rating: D. Well they didn’t have much of a choice here as Young is the only one that actually still works for the company. Run of the mill match for the night so far with the limited action and almost nothing interesting until the ending. Young winning was the obvious ending and he’s got a good looking piledriver but this was another predictable match, which wasn’t what this show needed.

Videos on Lashley and Galloway to set up the main event.

Eric Young yells about being on a crazy tidal wave.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Drew Galloway vs. Lashley

The winner gets Shera. Lashley powers him into the corner to start and chokes with his boot as we take an early break. Back with Lashley missing a charge in the corner and getting dropped with a top rope clothesline. Drew sends him shoulder first into the post to weaken the spear, which is the most common strategy used against a power wrestler, even though it almost never works. Back in and Lashley rolls some Germans before a powerslam gets two. Galloway comes back with White Noise and loads up the Claymore, only to run into the spear for the pin at 13:53.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. Galloway could have been an interesting way to go here but instead let’s go one step closer to being right back where we were a year ago. Lashley still has a lot in him and is a good option on top, but I was pulling for Galloway here to give us something fresh instead.

Here are the updated brackets:

Ethan Carter III

Davey Richards

Lashley

Mahabali Shera

Tigre Uno

Eric Young

Jesse Godderz

Matt Hardy

A long preview of next week’s round of eight takes us out.

Overall Rating: D+. I’m not going to bother re-listing all the issues I have with this show and tournament as I managed to squeeze them in during all the short matches that were just like the first eight weeks of short matches this tournament has offered. This was a step forward for the show but they’re dragging this out as long as they possibly can and it’s just not working. Want proof that it’s not working? The Impact after Bound For Glory 2011 drew just over two million fans. Last week drew 234,000 fans, which was up over the previous week. That’s a loss of 88% of the audience in four years.

Let me repeat that: in four years, nearly nine out of every ten people that had been watching TNA have stopped. A big reason why would probably be the same people in the main events over and over. Of the people still in this tournament with a realistic chance of winning (Lashley, Hardy, Carter and maybe Young and Shera), four of them are former World Champions. Galloway was a good option for something fresh but let’s make sure to get rid of him in the first round before he makes a splash in this thing. As I’ve said so many times over the years: they never learn.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. DJZ – 1%er

Tigre Uno b. Gail Kim – Rollup

Davey Richards b. Bram – Small package

Mahabali Shera b. Eli Drake – Sky High

Matt Hardy b. Bobby Roode – Twist of Fate

Jesse Godderz b. Awesome Kong – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Eric Young b. Kenny King – Piledriver

Lashley b. Drew Galloway – Spear

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