Impact Wrestling
Date: May 31, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

We’re getting closer to Slammiversary and the card is set for the most part. After last wee’s Hardy centric episode, tonight is about the World Title as Lashley and Drew Galloway get to choose each other’s opponents in a Pick Your Poison series. Other than that it should be interesting to see what gets some focus heading into the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s show, mainly focusing on Matt Hardy.

Dixie Carter is putting a mystery man in charge tonight.

Here are Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis (hokey smoke) to open things up. Mike knows that he’s not in charge because he didn’t hear from Dixie on AOL Instant Messenger or MySpace so he wants the boss to get out here right now. Of course it’s Ethan Carter III and Bennett freezes. Ethan thinks Mike should have the night off tonight and Bennett doesn’t seem to mind.

Actually what Ethan meant was a night off from wrestling because Mike will be cleaning the toilets all night. Maria freaks out but Ethan tells her to put a sock in it. Apparently she’s gotten on management’s nerves so tonight Ethan is reviewing her decisions to see if she’s fired. Bennett threatens violence but Ethan throws them out anyway. Now it’s time for Lashley, who teases a fight with Ethan but just wants to talk about Pick Your Poison with Drew Galloway. This brings out Galloway as we take a break.

We come back to see Ethan showing Mike the toilets he’s in charge of and apparently there’s quite the stench.

Back in the arena, Drew introduces Lashley’s opponent.

Bram vs. Lashley

Non-title. Bram hammers away to start but Lashley pounds him down and takes it to the floor with Bram being sent into the barricade. Lashley takes too much time messing with his headband though and Bram comes back with a few shots to the face. The Brighter Side of Suffering is broken up so Lashley catches him with a spinebuster. Some clotheslines look to set up the spear but instead Lashley heads outside for a chair and that’s a DQ at 6:19.

Rating: D+. This is a match that could have been something interesting but instead it’s a champion looking like a second rate loser. Bram is someone who could be an important talent going forward but why go with that when you can push someone else in his place? At least it wasn’t a clean pin though.

Post match Lashley spears Bram a few times until Galloway comes out for the save with a chair. Cue Eli Drake with his briefcase and you know what’s going on.

King of the Mountain Title: Bram vs. Eli Drake

Bram is defending and kicks out at two at the bell. They slug it out in the corner until Drake hits a knee to the face and clothesline for the pin and the title at 1:01.

Raquel’s latest lesson to the BroMans is to focus, which in this case means watching her walk around the pool in a swimsuit.

Mike Bennett is still cleaning toilets when Earl Hebner walks out of a stall. After a bit of swearing, Bennett is now a referee.

Drake drinks champagne and abuses people backstage.

We go to the Hardy Family Estate where Matt has invited Jeff for the contract signing.

BroMans vs. Tyrus/Rockstar Spud

Bennett is referee and the winners here get a title shot at Slammiversary. Robbie punches Spud to start and it’s off to Tyrus without a tag but Bennett says it’s fine. Jesse gets beaten down by both villains as the announcers talk about how Tyrus and Spud have nothing to do without Matt Hardy being around. A Raquel distraction lets Jesse come in and beat up Spud, setting up the BroDown. The Adonis Lock makes Spud tap at 4:03.

Rating: D+. I can’t imagine they give the BroMans the titles at Slammiversary, even with the good looking manager. Tyrus and Spud being all depressed without Matt around is a really stupid story and doesn’t fit Tyrus whatsoever, but that’s never been a major issue for TNA so I doubt it’s going to change here.

Maria, in a different outfit, is on the phone with Billy Corgan about how Ethan is screwing this place up. Ethan comes up and hangs up the phone. They’re about to head to the ring where he’ll settle this whole ordeal between Gail and Maria.

Clip of Jeff Hardy driving his motorcycle to Matt’s estate.

Ethan is in the ring as Maria, Allie and Sienna come down. The other two (Girl A and Girl B according to Ethan) are asked to leave as Ethan brings Gail Kim down. The result is going to be a match between the two of them at Slammiversary, which is what Gail has wanted from the beginning. As for tonight though, Gail has a partner and since Maria has two women on her team, we’ll have a tag match right now.

Gail Kim/Jade vs. Sienna/Allie

Allie screeches a lot as Gail and Sienna slug it out to start. A shot from Allie lets Sienna take over as the screeching continues. Sienna and Allie hit a double slam on Gail for two before it’s off to Jade to kick Sienna down. A missile dropkick gets two on Sienna but Allie tags herself in and tries to talk her way out of getting beaten up. That earns her forearms and a kick to the head as Sienna comes back in, only to Eats Defeat, followed by Jade package piledriving Allie in the face for the pin at 5:17.

Rating: D. Allie’s screaming is a big detraction here but this continues the theme of “let’s have good looking women on the show.” I know the Knockouts are a big deal but tonight has been a lot more about making the women into eye candy, with Allie’s short skirt here being a prime example.

We go back to the estate where Matt is playing the piano when Jeff comes in. Matt talks about this place being their genesis and walks away.

Back in the arena, Bennett freaks out on Ethan because he’s not a janitor or a referee. Bennett: “And my wife isn’t a wrestler.” Ethan gives him a match tonight and hopefully his opponent is sober.

James Storm vs. Mike Bennett

Joined in progress with Bennett in street clothes and getting two off a clothesline. We’re already off to a chinlock for a bit before Storm makes his comeback with right hands and clotheslines. Storm hits the Eye of the Storm and looks to set up the Last Call but Maria distracts him with a beer. Somehow this works on a former World Champion and a slap to the face lets Bennett grab a rollup for the pin at 5:55.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and since there was no real reason for them to be fighting it was a pretty worthless six minutes. It also doesn’t help that a former World Champion is easily pinned by a slap and rollup but they had to come up with some way out of this for Bennett.

Post match Ethan says he’s coming for Bennett at Slammiversary.

Here’s Al Snow to a BORING chant to talk about how he’s looking for talent over in England. This brings out Baron Dax and Basile Baraka (Marcus Louis and Sylvester LeFort), now collectively known as the Tribunal. Both of them talk about how they’re bringing talent and class back to wrestling. Snow yells about wanting to get rid of weapons unlike Grado, who he beat with a single wrestling move last week.

We see him pinning Grado after a Snow Plow, but here are Grado and Mahabali Shera to show us the full footage, including Snow using a trashcan lid. Snow goes off about how kids these days can doctor footage on any computer. Somehow parents are brought into this and Snow says Shera’s mom loves him. The fight is on and Snow hits Grado and Shera with a chair so the beatdown can be on.

Braxton Sutter (Pepper Parks) talks about how most people get their big break earlier but the day he was offered a contract was one of the best days of his life. He doesn’t have a story of when he started watching wrestling because it’s always been there for him. His goal is to be World Heavyweight Champion and he’ll start anywhere. This was a serious speech but had some emotion to it in a nice moment.

We run down the pay per view card.

Back to the Hardy estate where Matt says this must all end where it began. Jeff follows him into a barn where there’s a ring set up. Josh says stay tuned to find out if the match was signed. I’m sure that’s why they just advertised it on the pay per view rundown.

Lashley comes out to announce Drew’s opponent.

Drew Galloway vs. Decay

As in all three members. Drew fights both men at the same time but can’t bring himself to punch Rosemary. That allows the numbers game to take over with Drew being sent to the floor for a big beatdown, including a whip head first into the post. Back inside and the guys take turns hitting Drew in the face until Galloway starts his comeback. Rosemary comes in and almost eats the Futureshock. The Claymore is caught in a chokeslam for two so it’s Janice time. Cue Lashley to spear Abyss by mistake, allowing Galloway to Claymore and Futureshock Steve for the pin at 6:21.

Rating: D+. So Decay is off TV for weeks and then comes back to get beaten in a handicap match? No it wasn’t clean but you couldn’t drag out any two heels for this to work? Or have Lashley knock/choke Drew out for the pin? No apparently the best they have is Drew going over all of them at once because that’s how TNA thinks.

Enough of the World Title though as it’s time to go back to the Hardys. Matt says this must end where it all began, which apparently is the ring in the barn. Jeff goes to get in but Matt rolls outside to a small table. Jeff wants this to end but here’s Reby to throw a fake baby at him. Matt hits Jeff with something made of glass and gives him a Side Effect (IN FREAKING SLOW MOTION) through the table. Matt promises that this will end at Slammiversary.

Overall Rating: D. While still not good, this was WAY better than last week as they actually didn’t focus on just Matt vs. Jeff. This week it was about all three big stories but unfortunately we now have to sit around and watch Matt praise his own brilliance or whatever it is that he’s doing now because no one in TNA will ever tell him no. The rest of the show was more watchable due to more wrestling and less stupid talking but it still was a pretty boring show as TNA runs through what could have been weeks of stories in a night because they don’t have the roster to make anything else work.

Results

Bram b. Lashley via DQ when Lashley used a chair

Eli Drake b. Bram – Clothesline

BroMans b. Rockstar Spud/Tyrus – Adonis Lock to Spud

Gail Kim/Jade b. Sienna/Allie – Package piledriver to Allie

Mike Bennett b. James Storm – Rollup

Drew Galloway b. Decay – Futureshock to Steve

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Impact Wrestling
Date: May 17, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re getting closer to Slammiversary and one of the big questions coming out of last week is who is behind the Willow mask. Someone attacked Jeff Hardy last week while dressed as Jeff’s old alter ego in an attempt to take him out for good. Presumably this is the same person who sent Decay after Jeff two weeks ago. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Lashley attacking Drew Galloway a few weeks back. They fight for the World Title tonight but a fight broke out in the empty arena as they arrived earlier.

Here’s Willow to get things going. Josh: “The creation of the imagination of the mind of Jeff Hardy.” After the announcers talk about how Willow has come to life, he cackles about how he’s finally free. Cue Jeff Hardy to ask if Willow loves or hates before hammering away on him.

Jeff Hardy vs. Willow

Some right hands stagger Willow but he comes back with a Twist of Hate. The Twist of Fate puts Willow away at 39 seconds.

Jeff goes for the mask but here’s a bigger (though only average size) Willow to attack Jeff with the umbrella. A third Willow, clearly bigger than the other two, comes down the ramp to say something about giving Jeff his worst nightmare (the audio was very hard to understand).

Post break, Willow takes his mask off to reveal Matt Hardy. Matt talks about how Nero (Jeff’s middle name) got over because of Matt’s genius. A few weeks back, Jeff didn’t finish the job when he took Matt out so now it’s time to put Matt through his own personal nightmare. Matt chokes him out again and we’re finally done. If Matt being Willow surprised you in any way, shape or form, you haven’t been paying attention.

Velvet Sky is in the back where she was supposed to meet Maria. Instead there’s a newcomer named Allie, who is Maria’s bubbly new personal assistant (played by indy wrestler Cherry Bomb). Apparently Velvet is facing Sienna tonight and if she loses she’s fired.

Dixie Carter makes the World Title match a lumberjack match.

Velvet Sky vs. Sienna

Sienna rolls her up for a quick near fall before beating her into the corner. Velvet gets the same result off the same move before a running neckbreaker gives her another near fall. Not that it matters as Sienna puts Velvet on her shoulders for the spinning faceplant and the pin at 3:22.

Rating: D. Well uh, see you Velvet. That was quite the unceremonial ending to her TNA run as this was nothing more than a squash. Sienna is a good monster heel for Maria to hide behind and we’ve already gotten to the point of her character, which is about as simple of an idea as it needs to be. Nothing match here.

Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis are sitting by their pool with Maria getting up and diving in for a swim. After the very gratuitous shots of her, she sits back down with Mike talking about how he wants to be the best of all time in TNA. Maria is going to get some sun and then they’re going to head to the Impact Zone.

Here are Mike and Maria in the ring for a chat. Mike talks about how Ethan Carter III needs his road to redemption and if he loses once, there’s no rematch. Tonight, Ethan has an opponent who has been around the world and is very well known for his black and white. Therefore, get out here EARL HEBNER! Earl comes out and Mike wants to fight him tonight, Hall of Famer vs. future Hall of Famer. Another referee comes out and Mike begs Earl to fight him, eventually getting himself a punch to the face. The bell rings.

Mike Bennett vs. Earl Hebner

One punch drops Earl and Mike takes his shirt off…..for a two count. Yes Earl actually kicked out and for some reason it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen on TNA in months. Earl hits the worst low blow in years but Maria goes after him. Earl actually takes his shirt off, earning himself a boot to the face for the pin at 1:49. I really shouldn’t be laughing at this but it was HILARIOUS.

Post match Ethan Carter III runs out for the save but Mike has an opponent for him. That would be Tyrus, who attacks Ethan from behind, kicking off a last man standing match.

Ethan Carter III vs. Tyrus

Last man standing and joined in progress with Tyrus holding a nerve hold. Tyrus goes outside to get a chair but makes the mistake of wedging it in the corner, which means he goes head first into it instead. A trio of Stinger Splashes in the corner don’t do much damage to Tyrus so Ethan avoids a splash in the corner, setting up a high cross body. Carter hits him in the back with a chair for a nine so it’s time to set up two chairs.

Tyrus suplexes him through them for a close call and it’s table time. Tyrus misses a Vader Bomb and only hits table but still gets up. Ethan grabs a chair but gets sent flying off a suplex. A spike to the neck sends Carter to the floor for an eight and a Big Ending on the ramp gets nine. With nothing else working, Ethan grabs a piece of the barricade but Carter elbows him in the head and drops Tyrus onto the barricade. Ethan puts the steps on him and then beats the steps with a chair for the win at 10:48.

Rating: B-. This was more entertaining than I was expecting as they didn’t bother wasting time with wrestling and just started beating on each other with metal objects. Carter winning was the obvious way to go but hopefully this ends things with him and Tyrus. I know there’s some value in Tyrus as a heavy but he’s really not working as a wrestler, which to be fair is almost always the case with him.

Mike Bennett comes out and looks at Ethan.

Lashley training video.

Jeff Hardy says Matt took his own creation and promises to finish this at Slammiversary.

Eddie Edwards/DJZ vs. Andrew Everett/Trevor Lee

It’s all over the place to start until we settle down to DJZ sending Everett into the corner. A chase on the floor ends with Lee kicking DJZ in the face to take over with a near fall inside. It’s off to Edwards as things break down with Eddie’s Backpack Stunner getting two on Everett. Andrew’s moonsault hits a raised boot and Eddie takes the champ down on the floor, leaving DJZ to hit a jumping DDT for the pin on Everett at 5:13.

Rating: C. The match was fine, albeit completely meaningless. That’s the problem with this division: it’s here one week and then back a few weeks later with one vague story of Helms creating a stable and Edwards fighting against it but there’s very little to care about. The champion has taken a big backseat to Helms and if Helms never wrestles, it’s a big waste of time.

Galloway training video.

It’s time for Fact of Life with Eli Drake. After calling some people dummies, Drake says he can change the world with this Feast or Fired briefcase. This brings him to his guest tonight, the future former King of the Mountain Champion, Bram. The champ says the briefcase may be dangerous but Drake himself isn’t. That earns him a DUMMY, YEAH as Drake talks about how he’s going to win the title one way or another so Bram could just hand him the title right now. Bram thinks he should just rip out Drake’s throat so Eli leaves. Bram questions Drake’s manhood and a fight breaks out with Bram standing tall.

Ethan wants his match with Bennett tonight but Bennett says there’s one more match for Ethan first. That would be against Matt Hardy next week and Matt is a lot more nuts than when he took the title from Carter in the first place.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Lashley

Lashley is challenging and this is a lumberjack match. They lock up to start with Lashley taking him into the corner until a big boot puts Lashley down. The spear out of nowhere sends Drew outside though and we take a break. Back with Galloway being sent out to the floor before Lashley suplexes him again.

We hit a quickly broken chinlock before Drew starts slugging away, followed by a neckbreaker for a breather. A top rope clothesline drops Lashley but the Future Shock is broken up. Something like a chokeslam gets two for Lashley but Drew grabs the Celtic Cross. The Claymore is loaded up but the lumberjacks pull Drew outside for the DQ at 11:53.

Rating: C+. The match was fun while it lasted but it was clearly just a way to set up a rematch at Slammiversary. You could tell they were going for something screwy as soon as they put the lumberjacks out there and that makes for a less than thrilling main event. Drew vs. Lashley is a good enough match but the story is only hit or miss.

Post match the lumberjacks fight with DJZ hitting a dive to take out a bunch of them. Trevor Lee does the same thing before Eddie Edwards superplexes Everett onto the pile. Bram knees Lashley but Drake hits him in the back with the briefcase. Cue Jeff Hardy to take Eli down but Matt breaks up the Swanton. Bennett throws Drake to the floor but here’s Carter to chase him off, only to eat a spear. Drew gives Lashley the Claymore and flips onto the lumberjacks to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The ending was good but so much of this show felt like it was just sitting around waiting on the Hardys to do more stuff. Matt vs. Jeff is really dragging down what is an otherwise rapidly improving show with some feuds that make me want to see more of the show. The problem is Matt vs. Jeff is by far the biggest story going on and it wouldn’t shock me if they main evented the pay per view. There’s good stuff here but TNA’s standard problems keep holding it back.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Willow – Twist of Fate

Sienna b. Velvet Sky – Spinning faceplant

Mike Bennett b. Earl Hebner – Big boot

Ethan Carter III b. Tyrus when Tyrus couldn’t answer the ten count

DJZ/Eddie Edwards b. Trevor Lee/Andrew Everett – Jumping DDT to Everett

Drew Galloway b. Lashley via DQ when the lumberjacks interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

We’re about a month away from Slammiversary and for the most part the show hasn’t been brought up yet. Save for maybe a mention here or there, nothing yet has been announced. I’m sure you can figure out most of the card by this point though and things are ranging from interesting to not all that great. Let’s get to it.

The announcers talk about Lashley being the new #1 contender to the World Title.

We recap last week’s triple threat main event with Decay beating down Jeff Hardy so Lashley could get the win and the title shot.

Here’s Jeff Hardy to get things going by calling out Decay. Cue the whole team with Abyss talking about how Jeff’s devotion to the fans have made him weak. Steve says the same things so Jeff thinks the only way you can decay is when you die. “And that’s ok because I’m about to kill you.”

Rosemary implies that they were paid off to take out Hardy (well someone has to pay for that face paint) and that person will reveal themselves at the right time (It’s going to be Matt Hardy. Just save time and say it’s Matt Hardy already. Everyone knows it’s going to be Matt Hardy so just say it’s Matt Hardy and get us to the TLC match they’re going to have at Slammiversary, likely in the real main event.).

For now the brawl is on until James Storm comes out for the save. Abyss is willing to destroy both of them for free tonight. Jeff: “Let’s pretend I’m the weatherman.” No Jeff, I don’t want to pretend you’re a weatherman. It’s something about a charismatic storm after the break.

Tag Team Titles: Jeff Hardy/James Storm vs. Decay

Decay is defending and this is Storm’s guaranteed rematch since Roode is gone. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Storm for some clotheslines on Abyss before a Sling Blade gets two. Abyss drops Storm though and chokeslams Steve onto him for a near fall of his own. Storm raises a boot to stop a charging Steve and brings in Jeff for a Twist of Fate on Abyss. The Swanton is loaded up but the lights go out and Willow (Jeff’s old character) appears on stage. Gee, I wonder who is under the mask. A double mist from Decay sets up the Black Hole Slam on Jeff to retain the titles at 6:15.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s going to be Matt Hardy. As usual this is one of those ideas that really doesn’t need to be this in depth but TNA feels the need to build up the Hardy vs. Hardy feud, which really should be the biggest story in the history of wrestling because the Hardys are totally huge deals who have NEVER had a major violent feud before.

Remember how we looked at the triple threat match from last week? Well now we’re going to do that again, for the second time in about twenty minutes.

Drew Galloway doesn’t like Lashley.

Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis were at a Smashing Pumpkins concert last week and hung out with the band after the show.

Here’s Galloway for a chat. Drew is sick of Lashley and wants him out here right now. Lashley comes out and we get the traditional exchange of respectful greetings. We hear about how Lashley got into Kurt Angle’s head, which Drew says is Lashley’s game. He’ll try to get inside your head and then break you down physically, but Drew wants to fight tonight. Lashley says we can wait a week and leaves but Drew is going to fight tonight.

Cue Eli Drake to say it’ll never be over between the two of them. Drake is here to win gold and he’s going to win it all, even if he has to learn to do flips and win the Tag Team Titles on his own. Tonight though he’ll take that World Title and it’s time for a fight with a title match starting after a break.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Eli Drake

Drew is defending of course. Drake starts choking and drops a leg for two before they head outside with Drew firing off chops. Back in and the Future Shock is broken up so Drew settles for a snap powerslam for two. Drake tries to bring in the briefcase but the referee takes it away. Instead it’s the Claymore to the face and the Future Shock to retain the title at 5:42.

Rating: C-. As usual Drake isn’t much beyond competent in the ring but at least we got to hear some of his sweet mic work earlier in the night. I’m really not wild on the World Title being on in the first hour, especially given what is likely going to be happening in the main event slot. This was fine enough though.

Ethan Carter III wants a rematch with Mike Bennett and isn’t leaving the ring until he gets it.

Jade and Gail Kim are in Maria’s office and are going to be facing each other tonight. Maria wants a five star match like the ones that Davey M. guy is always talking about.

Here’s Ethan Carter, who makes sure to soak in some of the cheers before getting to his point. For over two years he was unbreakable, unbendable and unbeatable but now he’s just a man with a vendetta. Therefore, Bennett needs to fetch his wife and get out here to talk business. I’m sure there’s a reason Maria changed outfits between segments. Maria loads up her name but Ethan dubs her Toots McGee and cuts her off.

Mike says he has a huge ego because he was the first man to beat the unbeatable. Ethan wants a rematch right now but apparently Maria has talked to Billy Corgan and there’s a new idea. Apparently Mike has a challenge for Ethan in the form of a road to redemption. We’ll start tonight inside Six Sides of Steel with Ethan facing…..someone.

We look back at Willow distracting Jeff Hardy earlier tonight.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Jade

Jade is defending and Sienna is at ringside. Gail takes it to the mat for an early headlock but Jade comes back with one of her own. A crucifix is countered but Gail counters the counter into an armdrag, followed by an exchange of hurricanranas. They shake hands until Jade gets in a German suplex for two. A cross armbreaker over the ropes has Gail in trouble but Kim sends her outside for a suicide dive. Sienna offers a distraction so Jade can get in a suicide dive of her own, only to have Sienna beat Jade down for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it was clear that they were doing the mirroring story, which almost guaranteed the interference for the DQ ending. It’s a really good idea to have Sienna as an enforcer for Maria because no one is going to buy Maria as someone who can beat Gail or even hang with her. There was nothing to the match of course but there was no reason for there to be one here.

Sienna beats both of them down post match.

We go to Al Snow’s Wrestling Academy with a trainer torturing a student, which is how things used to be. Snow rants about how this is now the exception because it’s all about how the young guys get to come in and live their dreams without putting in any effort. Snow wants to be the Donald Trump of wrestling and make it great again, starting with Grado and Shera.

Ethan wants to know his opponent.

Al Snow vs. Mahabali Shera

Snow gets him into a chase around the ring before grabbing a wristlock back inside. They head outside with Snow pulling out a foreign object for a shot to the throat. Pope: “The Sheik just texted me.” That’s only good for two so Snow chokes with wrist tape for two more. The fans chant for Grado as Snow hits the Snow Plow for two more. Cue Grado to break up another foreign object shot, allowing Shera to hit the Sky High for the pin at 5:27.

Rating: D-. What in the world is the point of this story? They really don’t have anything better to do than doing an Al Snow vs. two comedy guys feud? As in that’s how weak the rosters have gotten at this point? I don’t know who this is supposed to be appealing to, but it’s certainly not me.

Jeff Hardy attacks Willow in the back and beats him down. After a break, Jeff is still at it until two more Willows attack him with the third giving him a Conchairto.

Video on Lashley vs. Galloway next week.

Ethan Carter III vs. ???

Inside a cage and the opponent is……Rockstar Spud. Carter hammers away to start and sends him into the cage a few times. Spud gets in a quick shot and chokes with his belt but he still can’t get out. Back in (after Spud looks like he’s being dragged under the bed in a slasher movie) and Carter keeps beating him up until Spud tries a fast climb. Carter is actually kicked off the cage and Spud drops a top rope elbow for two. The beating continues with Spud going into the cage over and over before gorilla pressing him off the top of the cage. The 1%er puts Spud away at 8:24.

Rating: D. Nothing to this one but it was entertaining enough. This was designed to be a squash so it worked on that front, but there’s only so much you can get out of a match with a clear ending and Spud getting squashed on less than an hour’s notice. It’s a cool idea for a story, even if it’s the same thing Sami Zayn did in NXT in 2014. At least they’re copying good promotions this time.

Overall Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it was almost all about three stories: Jeff Hardy vs. Willow (it’s Matt Hardy), Ethan Carter III vs. Mike Bennett and Lashley vs. Drew Galloway. My problem here is that the weakest of these stories (Hardy vs. Hardy) is getting the most TV time and attention. I wouldn’t be surprised that’s the main event of Slammiversary either, or at least the real main event of the show. This one really didn’t work all that well though and that’s going to be the case until they spread the focus around a little bit.

Results

Decay b. Jeff Hardy/James Storm – Black Hole Slam to Hardy

Drew Galloway b. Eli Drake – Future Shock

Jade b. Gail Kim via DQ when Sienna interfered

Mahabali Shera b. Al Snow – Sky High

Ethan Carter III b. Rockstar Spud – 1%er

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: May 3, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

For the first time in a long time, we’re coming up on a pay per view with Slammiversary airing in June. The big stories at the moment are Drew Galloway wanting to fight Lashley, probably in the pay per view main event, and Mike Bennett being the first man to defeat Ethan Carter III which likely sets up a rematch at Slammiversary as well. Now take all of that and forget most of it because it’s time to put the focus back on the Hardy Boyz. Let’s get to it.

Earlier today, Lashley attacked Drew Galloway at the gym and beat the champ down. They wound up in an MMA cage and Lashley knocked him down with one punch but couldn’t choke him out. Eventually some other wrestlers broke it up.

We look at Bennett pinning Carter last week.

Mike and Maria come out with the former bragging about being the one man to finally pull something off that no one else ever could last week. No one in the back can beat him and now he deserves to be World Champion. This brings out Jeff Hardy because of course it does, though at least it’s not so he can yell at Matt. Jeff doesn’t think much of Bennett beating Carter because it just makes him a joke. The fans say Jeff is better and a match is pitched for later tonight. Bennett says he’ll go ask Dixie but Jeff cleans house, prompting Mike to say we’ll do it.

Mike Bennett vs. Jeff Hardy

Joined in progress with Bennett slapping on a chinlock. Jeff fights back with an atomic drop and the legdrop between the legs but here’s Lashley to spear Jeff for the DQ at 1:48.

Bennett gets speared as well because Lashley is going to run through the entire roster until Dixie Carter gives him what he wants. Here’s Dixie who is indignant that Lashley wants to be handed a title shot. She makes Hardy vs. Bennett vs. Lashley for the #1 contendership as tonight’s main event with Drew as guest referee.

Rosemary asks Crazzy Steve is he’s ready for his transformation. He certainly is so she spits something into his mouth. Abyss takes off his mask and gets the same treatment. The stuff seems to burn both of their faces.

Here’s Decay for a chat. Rosemary talks about the team taking the titles from the people’s heroes last week and their transformations. Steve can now speak and talks about how Rosemary has changed him. Rosemary talks about how many people have tried to control Abyss, including his father and brother. Now though he can show his true self, which means he wears paint instead of a mask. Abyss says he’s beautiful and the fans seem to agree. Cue James Storm to say he’s a cowboy who drinks a lot of beer. It’s time for a fight and Decay is quickly dispatched. We’re not done yet though as Storm wants Abyss right now.

Abyss vs. James Storm

Joined in progress as well with Storm getting in a baseball slide to take the brawl outside. Rosemary and Steve go after Storm but neither draws a DQ, likely because of plot convenience. Storm fights back inside with his shots to the face and a bulldog for two. Abyss gets the same off a chokeslam but Storm puts him back down with a Sling Blade, setting up a top rope elbow for another near fall. Steve’s mist doesn’t work but Abyss’ blinds Storm so the Black Hole Slam can put him away at 6:00.

Rating: D+. This was what you would expect and the right ending with Abyss getting a win to confirm the Decay’s new power. I’m starting to like the stuff they’re going with after a long time of feeling like they were just another goth gimmick. If nothing else it’s actually getting more mileage out of Abyss which continues to astound me.

Maria wants Dixie to look at some papers. Jade better be smarter than Gail Kim was.

Jeff Hardy is more concerned about winning the title tonight than Matt.

Here’s Maria to call out Jade for a chat. Maria sees Jade’s star on the rise but thinks she needs to just hand over the title now because Jade wouldn’t be anywhere without her. Jade says no so Maria brings out her friend Sienna to fight the champ. Sienna throws her around to start but Jade gets in a few kicks. They head outside with Jade being sent hard into the steps. Back inside and Sienna gives her something like a spinning Big Ending to leave Jade laying.

Bram says he’s been called a lot of things and now he’s being called champion.

And now, in case you haven’t heard enough talking yet, we have a sitdown interview with Ethan Carter III. Well at least we would if he was here but Bennett comes in to say that Ethan is missing because he’s scared. Tonight he’ll get his title shot no matter what.

King of the Mountain Title: Bram vs. Eli Drake vs. Andrew Everett vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Jesse Godderz

Bram is defending in a King of the Mountain match, meaning you have to get a pin to become eligible to hang the title. If you pin someone, they’re sent to a penalty box for a minute so there’s some strategy involved. Jesse and Eli trade rollups to start as Everett hides on the floor with Shane Helms. Bram plants Everett with a powerbomb for the pin to become eligible early on.

Eddie grabs a half crab on Drake but Everett breaks it up for no logical reason. Edwards sends him out to the floor and hits a big dive, only to have Drake get in a cheap shot from behind for a rollup and pin to become eligible. Bram sets up a ladder and gets the belt but Jesse dropkicks him down. Drake slams Jesse but the champ comes back in for a Cactus Clothesline.

Everett misses a moonsault and gets caught in the Adonis Lock for a quick submission to make Jesse eligible. Edwards and Everett brawl to the back to leave us with three people. Godderz goes up but Drake pulls him down and hits him in the head with the Feast or Fired briefcase. He takes too long going up though and it’s Bram dropkicking the ladder down, allowing him to hang the title to retain at 7:25.

Rating: D+. I’m just not a fan of these matches and this didn’t change anything. It’s four guys getting title shots for no logical reason and this week the title is defended in a King of the Mountain match after last week’s title change was in a regular match. Just call the thing the TV Title and get rid of this stupid gimmick already because it’s way more complicated than it needs to be.

Drake tries to cash in post match but Bram gets up and chases him off.

Galloway says he’s had a rough day so he’d love to see Lashley try to put his hands on him.

Matt Hardy sits in the shadows and accuses Jeff of trying to remove him from this dimension. Their war isn’t done.

Before the main event, Ethan Carter III comes out to congratulate Bennett on the win. Carter isn’t like the rest of those people who lost to him over the years and then came out here to complain about it. He accepts this loss but it’s changed him. Bennett needs to go and win that World Title because he wants to take the title back from Mike one day. Carter rants about how the loss made him incomplete and kept him from becoming the best wrestler on the planet. He’ll be back for Bennett soon enough.

Jeff Hardy vs. Lashley vs. Mike Bennett

For the #1 contendership with champion Drew Galloway as guest referee. Drew promises to call this down the middle and we’re finally ready to go. It’s a slow start with both guys going after Lashley who easily powers them away. The big guy is sent outside though and Jeff takes them both out with a Whisper in the Wind as we go to a break.

Back with Jeff still fighting off both guys but eating a powerslam from Lashley. A long delayed vertical suplex, complete with a point to Galloway, plants Bennett. The spear hits Galloway though, followed by Bennett hitting the cutter on Lashley. Jeff dropkicks Bennett to the floor and adds the Swanton on Lashley for no count.

Bennett is sent face first into the steps over and over, followed by a Swanton onto Bennett on the steps. Cue the Decay for no apparent reason to go after Hardy, including a chokeslam onto the steps. Decay leaves so Lashley spears Jeff into the post for a great looking crash. Another spear gives Lashley the pin and the title shot at 14:02.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining enough at times and I’ll take Decay vs. Jeff over Hardy vs. Hardy any day. Lashley was the obvious winner here and that’s fine but this needed more time instead to really get good. If you take out the commercial and the Decay interference, this was under ten minutes long and that’s really not enough for a big epic match.

Lashley and Drew brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t do it for me as they didn’t even have thirty minutes of wrestling in a two hour show. There was just WAY too much talking on here and even though there was some good stuff built up, you have to actually have something in there instead of just setting up stuff for six weeks from now. I wasn’t feeling this one and the pacing issues really need to be fixed, including less than eight minutes of wrestling in the first seventy five minutes of a show. Big miss this week and that’s not a good sign on the first show of a new taping cycle.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Mike Bennett via DQ when Lashley interfered

Abyss b. James Storm – Black Hole Slam

Bram b. Eli Drake, Andrew Everett, Eddie Edwards and Jesse Godderz – Bram hung the title

Lashley b. Jeff Hardy and Mike Bennett – Spear to Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: April 26, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s another one of those big TV specials (Sacrifice in this case) for TNA with a main event of Tyrus challenging Drew Galloway for the TNA World Title. Other than that we have Ethan Carter III vs. Mike Bennett in a No DQ match and Beer Money defending the Tag Team Titles against Decay in a Valley of Shadows match. Let’s get to it.

Tyrus and Rockstar Spud are in the ring to start with Tyrus talking about how Drew Galloway has promised to defend the title against him no matter what condition he’s in. Here’s Drew and we’re ready to go.

TNA World Title: Tyrus vs. Drew Galloway

Drew is defending and has bad ribs coming in. Tyrus does the smart thing to start and sends Drew to the floor for some kicks from Spud. Some chops knock Tyrus back but the big man goes right back after the ribs to take over. A double legdrop to the ribs gets two but Tyrus misses a Vader Bomb. With the tape ripped off, Drew comes off the top with a chop to the head and (doesn’t) plant Tyrus with a horrible bulldog.

Spud gets dragged in and suplexed for his efforts, followed by a Claymore for two on Tyrus because this match MUST continue. A World’s Strongest Slam puts Drew down so Tyrus goes up, only to get caught with a right hand to the face. Drew gets two more off a superplex before the Futureshock puts Tyrus away at 7:55.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t even bad but it felt like it went on forever because only TNA thinks Tyrus is even the slightest bit interesting. Thankfully this gets rid of Tyrus as anything of importance and lets us move past the brilliant idea to have him win a World Title shot at the biggest show of the year.

We recap last week’s main event with Jeff Hardy hitting a Swanton off the set to knock out both guys.

Maria has plans for the Knockouts division.

Beer Money doesn’t care what the Valley of Shadows is because this is all about their legacy with the titles.

Maria is here to talk about rebuilding the Knockouts division through a revolution. Yeah they’re not even hiding the ripoff here. Cue Gail Kim to say Maria is ruining everything that has been built and to accuse Maria of having Rosemary kidnap her last week. Maria threatens her with her power and makes Gail vs. Rosemary. If this is really supposed to lead to Gail vs. Maria, they’re even more delusional than they thought.

Gail Kim vs. Rosemary

Rosemary has Crazzy Steve with her. It’s a brawl to start with Gail being sent outside and into the post. Back in and Rosemary puts on a full nelson with her legs. Gail easily gets out and puts on the figure four around the post, followed by a twisting top rope cross body for two. A Scorpion Death Drop gets two for Gail but Steve pulls her to the floor. This brings out Maria for a distraction, allowing Rosemary to mist Gail, followed by an F5 for the pin at 6:11.

Rating: D+. If there’s a point to this story coming that isn’t Gail vs. Maria coming anytime soon, I’d love for them to get to it already. The problem here is we’ve covered so much of Gail over the years that it’s really hard to get fired up about her again. In other words: GIVE US SOMETHING NEW ALREADY.

Here’s Eli Drake for Fact of Life where the mission is to name all the dummies. Like for instance Jeff Hardy, who dove off a scaffold to prove that he’s extreme. Or like Drew Galloway, who thinks having a belt makes him a big deal. Drake has a button to press after every name that says DUMMY, YEAH. His guests tonight are the BroMans, who are now wearing glasses.

Unfortunately they have no lenses so Drake thinks they’re dummies. Jesse had the chance to ride Eli’s coattails but decided to get back together with this waste of space like Robbie E. Jesse brings up the loss to Grado so Drake gets in his face and calls him every name he can think of, capped off by, of course, dummy. The BroMans quickly dispatch him and make fun of Drake’s catchphrase. As usual, Drake has a great presence to him and was one of the bright spots on the show.

Decay is ready for their Tag Team Title shot.

Ethan Carter III says he isn’t perfect because he’s no longer the World Champion. He’s on his way back though through revenge and that starts tonight with Mike Bennett.

Tag Team Titles: Beer Money vs. Decay

Decay is challenging in a Valley of Shadows match, which means anything goes. I’m assuming at least as there’s no explanation before the match. There are weapons everywhere and the lights are dimmer than usual. The champs control to start but are quickly pulled to the floor to keep up the brawl. Of course the lighting makes it difficult to see what’s going on but that might be best all around.

Pope tells us that this is No DQ and Josh throws in that it’s no countout, which you could tell on your own, furthering the theory that TNA announcers are entirely worthless. Decay takes over with Abyss throwing a bunch of weapons into the ring to continue the beating on the champs. Apparently Rosemary interfered at one point but the announcers couldn’t see what she did because of the lighting. A Rocket Launcher is broken up and Roode catapults Steve into a DDT from Storm. Abyss eats a spinebuster from Roode and a top rope elbow from Storm gets two.

We take a break and come back with Abyss bringing in the barbed wire board because this is yet another name for Monster’s Ball. The double suplex puts Steve onto the barbed wire but Abyss breaks up the name shouting. Now it’s thumbtacks because, again, this is Monster’s Ball. Rosemary comes in and mists Abyss by mistake, earning him a beer bottle to the head for two. Steve shoves Storm off the top and through a table, followed by a low blow to Roode. The chokeslam onto the tacks gives Decay the titles at 15:33.

Rating: C. Yeah fine. I know Roode is leaving and the team is done so Decay getting the belts makes more than enough sense but I’ve seen Abyss doing this match with this exact same set of spots so many times that it’s really hard to care anymore. Overall the match was fine but there’s no connection to it, which is the case for so many things in TNA.

We look back at Eric Young cutting off Bram’s beard last week.

Bram, still with a huge beard, says he’s ticked off and wants to end Young tonight.

Mike Bennett talks about how much his debut has changed things for Ethan Carter. No one has pinned him either so tonight the streak comes to an end.

King of the Mountain Title: Bram vs. Eric Young

Young is defending and they go at it from the bell. This is also falls count anywhere because we haven’t just gotten done with a hardcore style match. Bram backdrops him for two but the Brighter Side of Suffering off the apron is countered with a grab of the beard. Young pulls out a trashcan lid but opts for a low blow instead. A DDT plants Bram and there’s a trashcan lid shot for good measure. Young bites the face to break up a superplex attempt and drops the top rope elbow for two. The piledriver through a table is countered into the Brighter Side of Suffering through the same table for the pin and the title at 6:29.

Rating: D+. AND STAY OUT YOU RASPY VOICED PEST WITH A STUPID BEARD!!! In case you didn’t know, that was it for Eric Young and I couldn’t be happier. The guy always felt like he was in way too high of a spot and while he did have some moments, I’m so glad to see him finally out of TNA. Bram should have had that title a long time ago with Young being left out but then where would we have been without Young to guide us?

Drew Galloway wants to fight Lashley next week.

Here’s a banged up Jeff Hardy to update us on his condition. Jeff says he did what he did last week because he’s Jeff Hardy and hopefully that put some sense into Matt’s head. This brings out Reby and Spud to yell about how Jeff is selfish for hurting Matt. Reby slaps him a few times until Jeff knocks her hand away. Spud goes after Jeff’s leg and gets a Twist of Fate for his efforts.

Mike Bennett vs. Ethan Carter III

Street fight. They get right in each others faces to start and Ethan clotheslines him out to the floor. Bennett grabs a chair but gets backdropped out to the floor for his efforts. Some chops up against the barricade have Bennett in even more trouble and Carter stops a charge in the corner with a raised boot. Mike sends him shoulder first into the post though and the arm is wrapped around the post for good measure.

Ethan starts his comeback but can’t get the 1%er. Instead he settles for two off a jumping Downward Spiral, followed by a double clothesline to put both guys down. Bennett grabs a quick cutter for two so it’s time to beat the tar out of Carter with a chair. The 1%er connects but Maria comes in to break up the cover. Carter unloads on him with the chair and puts on a cobra clutch, only to have Bennett climb the ropes and flip backwards for the first ever pin on Carter at 11:08.

Rating: B. I’m digging the heck out of this feud and I’m hoping it continues. The key thing here though is that they treated Carter getting pinned as something big and then gave that accolade to someone who could go somewhere with it. Really solid main event here and exactly what this show needed.

Bennett is STUNNED to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event helped a lot but this really didn’t feel like a big show. The name didn’t help things either as this felt more like Hardcore Justice than a run of the mill show like Sacrifice. It doesn’t help that the World Title match had Tyrus involved and then three straight hardcore style matches. The main event was good though and TNA has some potential going forward, even though I have no reason to believe it’s going to last.

Results

Drew Galloway b. Tyrus – Futureshock

Rosemary b. Gail Kim – F5

Decay b. Beer Money – Chokeslam onto a pile of tacks

Bram b. Eric Young – Brighter Side of Suffering through a table

Mike Bennett b. Ethan Carter III – Rollup counter to a cobra clutch

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: April 19, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

It’s a big night here as we have the battle of the Hardyz with the right to the last name on the line. In this case it’s an I Quit match over the name, as well as a ladder match with all of the Knockouts at once for control of the division. This isn’t about the title but rather about who runs the Knockouts as a whole. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Hardyz feud and how big tonight is.

Knockouts Ladder Match

Pretty much every active Knockout is involved here. Gail goes after Jade to start as it’s a bunch of brawling all over the place. The Beautiful People (still a thing because of reasons) dropkick a ladder into the Dollhouse’s collective faces, only to have Jade get up and do the Terry Funk ladder around the head spot.

Gail gets pulled down and slapped by Maria, sending them up the ramp in a chase. Cue Rosemary and the Decay to blast Gail with a kendo stick and kidnap her, even further guaranteeing the winner here. The rest of the match stays broken down with Jade clearing out the ring but getting powerbombed off the ladder by Marti. Maria kendo sticks Velvet down and goes up for the contract to win control at 5:13.

Rating: D. Were you expecting anything else? Maria and Gail are the only real characters in the whole division so who else were you going to go with here? Gail being kidnapped is better than having her talk about how serious things need to be for a change and Maria is far more entertaining than the rest of the division so this is the right idea all around. Horrible match of course but Maria isn’t much of a worker.

Drew Galloway is going to call out Lashley right now.

Maria and Mike Bennett are happy.

Decay has Gail in the rafters.

Here’s Drew, with heavily taped ribs, to call Lashley out. Apparently the spears from last week have cracked his ribs and he’s not allowed to wrestle this week. However, the TNA officials didn’t say anything about him fighting tonight. Drew invites Lashley out here to finish the job but it’s Rockstar Spud coming out instead.

Spud says if there was a match right now, he’d easily become the new World Champion. He’s out here to warn us that tonight is the last night that we’re going to see Jeff Hardy. Drew is about to beat him down when Tyrus comes out to say he told us so. Those ribs are a target and that’s what Tyrus likes. He’ll take that title match next week and it doesn’t matter what condition Drew is in. Drew agrees and they shake hands. Spud goes after Drew and it’s a double beatdown on the ribs, including a big splash.

Reby Hardy is holding a camera to film Matt, who promises to make Jeff quit once and for all.

The Decay still has Gail, who Rosemary calls a pawn.

X-Division Title: DJZ vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is defending and none of them get entrances. The champ bails to the floor to start but is almost immediately chopped by both challengers. Edwards is sent into the post so Lee hooks DJZ in a chinlock. That’s broken up with a jawbreaker until Eddie comes back in with a hard shot to Lee. Shane Helms pulls DJZ to the floor but Eddie breaks up a superplex attempt. Shane gets on the apron again though, allowing Andrew Everett to run in and shove Eddie into a jumping knee to retain Trevor’s title at 4:20.

Rating: D. So much for Lee doing anything with the title and all the work that Tigre Uno put into his title reign for that matter. Now it’s all about Shane Helms and a boring string of matches where Lee is a glorified project instead of the focus of the division like he’s supposed to be.

Everett gives Edwards a 630 post match.

Post break Shane and company says that Andrew Everett is the newest member of the Helms Dynasty.

Here are Eric Young and Bram for Eric’s weekly “I’m awesome” speech. He brags about how devastating the piledriver is and says no one can beat him because everyone can try. Young is tired of TNA sucking up to these young punks like the marble mouth Scotsman Drew Galloway.

Therefore, this is the last time you’ll be seeing him because he and Bram quit. Actually not so fast because Bram doesn’t quit. Bram is tired of playing second fiddle to Eric and thinks that King of the Mountain Title would look better around a real man’s waist. Young gets in a quick piledriver and walks off, only to come back and grab a pair of scissors to shave Bram’s beard.

Jeff Hardy thinks the World Title changed Matt and he’ll do whatever he has to do tonight.

Here are Mike Bennett and Maria with something to say. Mike wants all the attention on him because it’s time for a fairy tale. Once upon a time there was a prince with full control over a kingdom and his name was Ethan Carter III (dang I was hoping for Adam Cole). Prince Ethan had it all until one day a white knight called the miracle arrived. Then one day the Prince decided to fight the knight, who took all of the Prince’s power. This is now Bennett’s Kingdom of Miracles but here’s Ethan to interrupt.

Ethan wants the record to show that it was a disqualification win but then he beat Bennett down. He likes a lot of Bennett’s style but at the end of the day, Ethan is just the better man. If Bennett won’t fight him, Ethan will be Mike’s new shadow and beat him down every chance he can. Bennett says that the two of them can fight as many times as they want and he’ll beat Ethan every time because Ethan will keep coming back with another excuse. Ethan talks about how he’s never been pinned or submitted around here but if Mike wants to be the man, face him next week in a No DQ match at Sacrifice. Bennett is game.

Gail wakes up and calls Decay insane.

Here’s Al Snow to talk about how much he can’t stand this group of fans. They’ll watch every week and complain about it on the internet but then they keep watching. Back in the day, not everyone was allowed in the wrestling business and Snow would never pay to see any of these people in the ring. Tonight, he’s giving Mahabali Shera a lesson in what wrestling really means.

Al Snow vs. Mahabali Shera

Al jumps Shera during the entrance and stomps him down before grabbing the mic and calling fans into the ring for a fight. Shera makes his comeback and knocks Snow outside, only to have Al crawl under the ring and come out the other side to deck Shera again. Back in and Snow shrugs off another comeback by hitting Shera in the head with a foreign object. Snow takes forever and covers for the pin at 5:35, giving us a great overhyped cover and celebrating.

Rating: D. Snow is playing the character really well but good night there’s just no hiding the fact that it’s Al Snow getting this kind of time. You would think there would be someone else to take this spot and get a nice run out of it but since TNA can barely run a TV show anymore, the young guys are now doing jobs for people who barely wrestle once a year.

Decay says Gail might be sacrificed.

Eli Drake will have his own talk show next week called Fact of Life.

Here’s Decay with Gail for the plan’s payoff. Rosemary calls us all pawns and puppets and threatens to cut off Gail’s hair. Abyss says the only thing that can save her now is Beer Money, so here are the champs for the save. Storm and Roode have to stay at ringside because Abyss has to issue a challenge for the Tag Team Titles. However, he wants the match to have no rules or regulations, which is called the Valley of Shadows. The match is on and Gail is released.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

I Quit for the Hardy name. Jeff headscissors him out of the corner to start and they clothesline each other a few times. Jeff can’t get the Twist of Fate so he puts on a Figure Four of all things to make Matt scream no a lot. The hold is turned over twice so here’s Rockstar Spud for the save, only to have Jeff powerbomb him with ease. Matt uses the distraction to knock his brother out to the floor where he pelts a chair at Jeff’s head to break up a dive.

We take a break and come back with Matt bending Jeff’s arm around the barricade but getting pulled into the steel for his efforts. They head into the production area with Jeff swinging a pipe to hit Matt’s ring bell before going up towards the rafters. Jeff slides down the railing with a chair to the head but Matt still won’t quit.

Matt gets knocked onto some cases so Jeff can climb a ladder, only to have Matt climb up and hit a Side Effect to drive him though a piece of barricade. Back up and Jeff grabs a choke to knock Matt out without him quitting. That’s fine with Jeff who goes way up on top of the set for a Swanton onto Matt through a table. The match is stopped at about 18:30 as medics take care of them both and we go off the air.

Rating: C+. So yeah, after all that, there’s no finish and we’re likely getting something else out of these two in weeks to come because they’re the real stars of the show. The big dive looked good but I really don’t need to see these two doing stuff like that anymore. It was entertaining fifteen years ago but now it feels like they’re stretching instead of entertaining.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had some good stuff but it was scattered throughout a lot of weak action and far too little wrestling. You really should be able to get in more than a quick ladder match, a nothing triple threat, an Al Snow win and a main event without a finish. It really doesn’t help that the focus is on Matt vs. Jeff and Tyrus is #1 contender. Yeah there’s interesting stuff otherwise but I need WAY more than that to keep me entertained for two hours a week. It’s a watchable enough show but parts of it are going to put you to sleep.

Results

Maria Kanellis won a ladder match by pulling down the contract

Trevor Lee b. DJZ and Eddie Edwards – Jumping knee to Edwards’ chest

Al Snow b. Mahabali Shera – Foreign object to the head

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy went to a no contest

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 29, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Drew Galloway

It’s a big night this week as we have Jeff Hardy getting a World Title shot against champion Drew Galloway. On top of that we’ll probably be looking at the fallout from last week’s big gauntlet match, as well as maybe having the Knockouts Title match between Gail Kim and Jade. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s gauntlet match with Jeff Hardy eliminating his brother Matt for the win.

Here’s the Matt Hardy Brand to open things up. As expected, Matt is livid about losing the match last week and calls it an injustice. He wants and demands a title shot tonight because Jeff doesn’t deserve one. This brings out Maria and Mike Bennett with the latter talking about how he deserves the title shot because no one wants to see Matt as champion again.

Maria and Reby almost get into it before the guys talk about their lack of respect for each other. Before any punches can be thrown though, here’s Ethan Carter III to interrupt. Ethan pitches a show about the Matt Hardy Brand being the Three Stooges before praying for Mike Bennett’s career. That’s enough for Mike as he yells at Ethan, only to have Matt cut them off and challenge Ethan to a fight against the entire Matt Hardy Brand, including Reby. Ethan says game on.

Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Hardy Brand

Tyrus throws Ethan around to start and it’s quickly off to Spud, who crawls away at the first threat of violence. It’s back to Tyrus who breaks up some right hands in the corner with a nice hot shot. Spud and Tyrus take turns on Carter with Matt coming in for a few cheap shots in the vein of Bobby Heenan. Carter finally fights back against Matt but has to deal with Tyrus instead of hitting the 1%er. Spud gets caught in a cobra clutch, which draws in Bennett for the DQ at 6:28.

Rating: D. Boring stuff here with Matt following a simple formula but not being all that interesting. That sums up the Matt Hardy Brand as a whole: they’re doing all the right things as heels but there’s almost no interest. Carter is doing really well in the face roll but he needs someone better to work off. Like say, Bennett for example.

Post match the Brand beats Carter down until Beer Money comes out to clear the ring. They heard a fight going on and would love to get in on that so let’s make this a six man tag.

Matt Hardy/Tyrus/Mike Bennett vs. Ethan Carter III/Beer Money

This is joined in progress with Storm working over Bennett until Tyrus pulls James off the apron. Tyrus starts working on the ribs and goes simple by burying the point of his elbow into James’ back. James tries to bite the hand to escape and takes Bennett down for the hot tag to Roode. Bobby starts cleaning house as everything breaks down with Carter chasing Bennett and Maria up the ramp, leaving Storm to Last Call Tyrus. Both heels get suplexed but Tyrus gets in a heart punch, setting up the Twist of Fate to put Roode away at 6:07.

Rating: C-. Standard six man here with Carter and Bennett leaving Beer Money, as in the Tag Team Champions, to get pinned in a standard tag match. You can also tell that they’re running low on ideas as they used one story to carry a fourth of the show. It doesn’t help that it’s not the best story on the show but that’s standard for TNA.

Gail Kim isn’t happy with what Maria pulled last week so tonight it’s Madison Rayne vs. Velvet Sky for the #1 contendership. I guess Jade lost the shot?

The BroMans can’t believe they’re back together when Eli Drake comes in to laugh at them. Jesse says he has an idea.

Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne

#1 contenders match. Velvet puts on a headlock to start and Madison gets annoyed, causing things to get a bit heated. A clothesline gets two on Sky but some Skylines (I’ve heard worse) put Rayne in trouble, followed by a bulldog for two. Not that it matters as a quick jackknife rollup gives Rayne the pin at 3:35.

Rating: C. This is another match we’ve seen so many times before and it’s really hard to care about the same women who just pop up every few weeks for a filler match like this. The Knockouts division continues to need a lot of fresh blood, which it seems we might be getting with Jade and Maria. The match was fine but nothing I never need to see again.

Velvet raises her hand post match.

Drew Galloway talks about needing to do something special to beat Jeff Hardy tonight.

Pope gets in the ring with something to say. People have been noticing that he’s been getting more physical lately because Pope has to be the man that he is inside. A few weeks ago he stood up for his announce partner and Lashley doesn’t seem cool with that. Cue Lashley who tells Pope to apologize and go sit down because he’s not a man anymore.

Pope talks about getting into this business at the same time as Lashley, which means he wants to fight right now. Lashley gets in and the brawl is on with referees not being able to hold them back. Pope sidesteps a spear and Lashley goes to the floor, allowing Pope to hit a BIG dive off the top. Security still can’t break them up so we cut away. I’m not a Pope fan by any stretch but this was really good.

Another video on last week’s gauntlet.

Jeff Hardy is used to being the underdog.

Matt Hardy hates the main event.

Jeremy Borash has taken over for Pope on commentary.

Here are Eric Young and Bram with Eric talking about how awesome he is and blaming Bram for the elimination last week. Everyone wants to be him so he’s watching Jeff win the World Title tonight so he can take it away from him later. Cue the BroMans for our third unannounced match of the night.

BroMans vs. Bram/Eric Young

The BroMans clean house to start until Bram stomps Robbie down in the corner to take over. The beating doesn’t last long though as Jesse gets the hot tag and starts to clean house. Bram holds Eric but eats a right hand from his partner. Jesse knocks Eric into Bram and it’s the BroDown to put Young away at 4:28.

Rating: D. Storyline instead of a match here and there’s nothing wrong with that. The BroMans are a fun enough act to be a low level tag team but more important to me here is the fact that Bram and Young seem to be splitting. I haven’t cared for Young in years and I’m glad Bram might be getting some spotlight for a change.

Grado and Mahabali Shera are ready for the celebration (and dancing) when Al Snow jumps them and breaks Grado’s arm. Yes, AL SNOW is now getting a feud. That’s how bad things have gotten.

Here are Trevor Lee and Gregory Helms to call out Eddie Edwards. Helms praises the Wolves for being amazing and revolutionary but thinks it’s time for his in ring debut. He’s been a champion around the world and beaten some of the best of all time so how about they get together and win the Tag Team Titles? Eddie has a week to make his decision.

Pope wants to fight Lashley with no rules next week.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy is challenging and gets a headlock takeover out of the corner to take over early. Drew comes back with an overhead belly to belly and Hardy is already in trouble. The champ is sent outside for a dive from Hardy and we take a break. Back with Jeff getting two off a Twist of Fate but taking too much time going up and getting superplexed down.

The Claymore gets two and they head up top for what looked to be a super powerslam from Drew but Jeff reverses into something like a hiptoss. That looked to be a bit botched but it was good enough. Another Twist and the Swanton get two on Drew so Jeff sends it outside and puts Drew on the steps. The Swanton hits knees though and it’s a quick Futureshock to give Drew the pin at 14:18.

Rating: B-. Another pretty good main event here with Jeff being a good first victory for Drew, but they certainly didn’t hit a special level. It’s good that they’re getting Jeff out of the way early though as he’s one of those guys who is always going to be near the top of the roster so thankfully Drew can focus on someone new.

Apparently that new means Matt, who comes out to say that he was hoping Jeff won but he’ll settle for taking the World Title from Drew next week. Drew is ready to fight right now but here are Bram and Eric Young to help beat him down. That earns them a double Claymore and Jeff hits Matt with a Twist of Fate. Next week, Jeff wants Young in Six Sides of Steel.

Overall Rating: D+. I didn’t hate the show and they’re definitely making sense with the stories but it’s really hard to get behind a roster with Gregory Helms, Tyrus, Matt Hardy and Al Snow getting so much air time. The storylines are put together well enough but nothing has a spark. There’s nothing going on that I look forward to (though Pope vs. Lashley looks good) and a lot of that is due to how much we see the same people.

Look at the ending: MORE Hardys and more Bram/Eric Young. I get that they’re low on talent right now but they really need to get some fresh bodies in there, especially with Roode and Young leaving at the end of this taping cycle. The Hardys are all over this show and I’m really sick of them. Drew is a good choice for the young face champion but the show is all about Matt and Jeff and that’s been old. Freshen things up a bit, even if you have to hire some new low level names. You never know what you might find in there and it might help things out a bit.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy Brand via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered

Matt Hardy/Tyrus/Mike Bennett b. Ethan Carter III/Beer Money – Twist of Fate to Roode

Madison Rayne b. Velvet Sky – Jackknife rollup

BroMans b. Eric Young/Bram – BroDown to Young

Drew Galloway b. Jeff Hardy – Futureshock

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 22, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews

It’s a new era in TNA (yes another one) as Drew Galloway won the World Title last week from Matt Hardy. Other than that we’re near the beginning of the final taping cycle for Eric Young and Bobby Roode so it should be interesting to see what happens to them before they leave. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the events that led to the new World Champion last week.

Here’s Drew for his first speech as World Champion. He’s worked a long time to get here and now he wants to be the kind of champion who brings this company back to where it once was. Drew doesn’t care what it takes because he’ll use this title to bring honor back to TNA. Cue Matt Hardy with Rockstar Spud and Reby to call Drew a cheating thief. Drew talks about being at a great after party last week after winning the title. He didn’t steal a thing because he took the title by capitalizing on the chaos.

Matt promises that the Matt Hardy Brand (Is that the stable name?) will destroy Drew. The champ is ready to fight so here is Jeff to say he’s at the front of the line for the first title shot. That’s just fine with Drew who says Jeff can have a title shot if he’d like one. Matt wants Jeff to get back on his dirt bike and break the rest of his limbs. Cue Eric Young and Bram (because of course) to beat Jeff down. The Matt Hardy Brand (yes that’s the official name it seems) works on Drew. A table is loaded up and we take a break.

Back with the villains still in control and beating on the good guys until Ethan Carter III makes the save with a chair. Carter says we’re not having a punch party without inviting EC3. Drew gets up and Carter says he’s definitely a deserving champion, but he (Ethan) was never pinned for it. The challenge is laid out and Drew immediately accepts. This brings out Mike Bennett and Maria with Bennett saying he pinned Drew last week and deserves the shot. Drew is willing to fight them all so here’s Dixie to announce a gauntlet match between the Hardys, Bennett, Carter and presumably Young.

Been Money lists off various former teams who might be answering their open challenge tonight. The shots at Pacman Jones are kind of funny.

It’s time to draw for the gauntlet match order. Bennett goes first and promises to beat the best TNA has to offer to become World Champion. He seems happy with his number.

Here’s Beer Money to issue an open challenge for the Tag Team Titles with a surprise team answering.

Tag Team Titles: Beer Money vs. BroMans

Sure why not. Robbie runs Roode over to start but it’s quickly off to Storm as the announcers talk about the BroMans by mentioning the World Title Series. Jesse comes in for some lockups with Storm as the challengers (and heels I guess) take over on James in the corner. A clothesline is enough to bring in Roode for the house cleaning, including a spinning Rock Bottom for two as everything breaks down. The Bro Attack (formerly known as the BroDown) gets two on Roode but a Last Call into the DWI is enough for the pin on Robbie to retain at 5:38.

Rating: C. Match was fine but it’s very telling that with the Wolves out and Decay defeated for the time being, it’s already time to start putting old teams back together. This division hasn’t actually been a division for years now and it’s getting clearer and clearer every single month. Hopefully this lasts more than one week.

Decay says……something about hurting Davey Richards.

Eric Young says Bram’s spot is by his side and both guys seem happy about their numbers. Young again thinks someone is stalking him.

Eddie Edwards vs. Crazzy Steve

No DQ. It’s a brawl in the aisle to start with Eddie getting the better of it until Abyss offers a distraction so Steve can get in a few shots from behind. A running Cannonball against the steps crushes Eddie again and it’s time to actually head inside. Rosemary sends in a bunch of chairs for a Raven drop toehold into the steel. More chairs are wedged into the corners but Steve is sent head first into several of them. Rosemary finally pulls the referee out at two so Eddie sends Steve into her, setting up a rollup for the pin at 6:49.

Rating: D+. I get the idea behind the Decay but they really don’t do much for me. Yeah they’re the latest creepy stable and that’s fine but it’s really nothing I’m going to get excited about. Eddie needs to move on to the X-Division to breathe some life into it so hopefully this Decay feud doesn’t go anywhere.

Maria talks about how Gail Kim as Knockouts Champion hasn’t changed a thing. A revelation is promised.

Dixie Carter seems to put Lashley in the gauntlet match.

Jeff Hardy is ready to draw when Ethan comes in. Ethan draws #1 but we don’t see what Jeff’s number is.

Knockouts Title: Maria vs. Gail Kim

Maria is challenging but before the bell she talks about how she’s been granted something by TNA management. Before that’s announced though, she has some special guests: the Dollhouse. Maria talks about how the Dollhouse has had a bunch of leaders over the months but nothing special has ever come of it. That means it’s time for the Dollhouse to split up because only little girls play with dolls. Marti Belle gets in her face and says no way but Maria offers a title shot to the winner of a triple threat between the Dollhouse. Gail is fine with this and just leaves.

Marti Belle vs. Jade vs. Rebel

The match starts after a break with Maria on commentary. Rebel gets double teamed in slow motion before getting kicked down in a High/Low. As expected the other two get in a fight over who gets the fall before putting on a double half crab. Maria continues her borderline creepy talk about reaching potential as Rebel gets knocked down again, allowing Jade and Marti to take over. Marti electric chairs Jade off the top and all three are down. Then, in something we haven’t seen yet, Rebel gets laid out so the other two can fight. Jade Rock Bottoms Marti onto Rebel for the pin at 6:29, though that should be Marti pinning Rebel.

Rating: D. This felt like it went on forever though it did a good job at making Maria look like the most interesting Knockout in years. There’s something about her that just gets your attention and that’s exactly what the division has been lacking. Gail really isn’t interesting and it’s LONG past time for something fresh.

The Matt Hardy Brand draws their numbers as Matt claims conspiracy. He winds up with the best number though.

We recap Grado winning the ladder match last week.

Grado is excited about a party next week but Mahabali Shera is annoyed that Odarg left without paying him back $50. Grado accidentally pulls out an Odarg mask but Shera is too stupid to notice.

Gauntlet Match

Before the match, Drew says there’s too much talking tonight. A-freaking men brother but what do you mean tonight? With him as champion, you can expect a lot more action because he’s heading to the back so we can have this match. This brings out Lashley to congratulate Drew, drawing a NO MORE TALKING chant. Lashley is in the gauntlet match because he wants that title shot too. Ethan Carter III finally cuts them off as entrant #2.

This is basically a mini Royal Rumble with over the top eliminations which at least saves us from some bad falls. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get a hiptoss so Carter nails a running shoulder. There’s the Stinger Splash in the corner and Carter hammers away until Spud comes in at #3. The heels start double teaming Carter for a few minutes until Bennett comes in at #4 (complete with Maria back in the same dress she was in earlier and not the pink outfit she was in during the match).

Carter goes right after Bennett but gets taken out by Spud as Eric Young is in at #5. There are still no eliminations as they mostly stand around and do little shots to each other. Tyrus is in at #6 to give us five heels at once. Unfortunately he takes so long getting to the ring that Spud gets tossed by Carter as we take a break.

Back with Bram in as well and Lashley spearing Bennett down to be the only man left standing. Tyrus is tossed to clear the ring a bit, followed by Bram kneeing Young by mistake to get rid of him. Lashley spears Bram and throws him out, leaving Lashley, Carter and Bennett in the ring. This brings Pope off commentary to throw Lashley out, which of course counts. Carter saves Pope from Lashley and clotheslines him over the top for a more legitimate elimination. That allows Pope to fight Lashley up the ramp until Matt Hardy is in at #8.

Bennett and Hardy start double teaming Carter until Jeff Hardy comes in at #9. The fans chant for Hardy, which may or may not be a very sudden shift in support for Matt. These are the final four, which we’re told a few moments into the fight because there was no indication that Jeff was the final entrant. Carter backdrops Bennett out but Bennett grabs his hand, allowing Matt to get the elimination.

We’re down to Hardy vs. Hardy with Matt taking over and dropping a bunch of legdrops. The Side Effect has Jeff in more trouble but he comes back with a whip into the corner and the slingshot dropkick. Matt gets in a Twist of Fate but can’t send Jeff to the floor, allowing Jeff to backdrop him out for the title shot at 23:50.

Rating: C+. This match is a microcosm of TNA in a nutshell: they have all these interesting stories and ideas with potential to do something new but it’s all about the Hardys. Whether you like it or not, it has been determined that you’re getting Matt vs. Jeff and that’s all there is to it. Not a bad match or anything but Matt vs. Jeff really isn’t interesting and I can’t imagine that’s the last we’ll be seeing of it.

Drew applauds Jeff to wrap things up.

Overall Rating: C. Not the worst show in the world here but the key is the potential. Drew Galloway and Maria Kanellis seem like the real deal but that’s been the case far too many times in the past for me to get my hopes up. The other problem is of course TNA’s taping cycle and how they’re going to replace all this departing talent. They need some new signings in a hurry or this could get a lot worse very fast. Good building show this week, but those Hardys need to be kept apart.

Results

Beer Money b. BroMans – DWI to Robbie

Eddie Edwards b. Crazzy Steve – Rollup

Jade b. Marti Belle and Rebel – Rock Bottom to Marti

Jeff Hardy won a gauntlet match last eliminating Matt Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 15, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

This is a special live(ish) episode with some major matches taking place. We have Jeff Hardy returning (as he does every single year after the company gets back from the UK) to go after Eric Young but not for the King of the Mountain Title, as well as Matt Hardy defending his World Title against Ethan Carter III (again). Let’s get to it.

Eric Young vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title but before the match, Young finds Dixie Carter in the back and yells about how he’s going to destroy the golden boy tonight. The fight starts fast with Jeff trying an early Twist of Fate but Eric bails to the floor. Dixie cuts off the match and says the winner of this is going on to the main event for the World Title. The fans get behind Jeff as Eric pounds away and shoves Jeff off the top for a big crash.

Back in and Eric stomps Hardy in the corner before crotching him again to break up a Whisper in the Wind attempt. A choke out of the corner and a neckbreaker give Eric a near fall but he dives into a raised boot to give Jeff a breather. Another Twist of Fate is broken up as Eric gets crotched, only to shove Eric down and hit the Swanton for the pin at 10:02.

Rating: C-. Just a basic match here but that announcement sealed the ending. You knew they were going to try to get Jeff into the title hunt as soon as possible as they really don’t have anyone else to thrown out there. The match was nothing interesting either but that’s to be expected with these two.

Post match here are Matt Hardy and company with something to say. After the break, Matt says he would have been there to help Jeff but he had to take care of his family. Reby thinks that Jeff is Maxell’s second favorite wrestler and lets him hold the baby. Matt offers his brother a long build towards a Bound For Glory match but Jeff doesn’t buy it. He’ll take that match tonight and counters a Twist of Fate attempt into one on the champ to stand tall.

Earlier today, Eddie Edwards was attacked by the Decay.

Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis promise to destroy Gail Kim and Drew Galloway.

Eddie Edwards says he’s ready to fight Beer Money on his own but they’re willing to join forces with him to fight Decay tonight.

Mike Bennett/Maria Kanellis vs. Gail Kim/Drew Galloway

The women start but Maria bails to the corner for a tag before anything can happen. Drew comes in and kicks Mike in the face before bringing Gail back in for a few shots of his own. Back to Drew as the announcers talk about the sitcoms airing on POP. Drew tells Bennett to bring it so Maria slaps him in the face.

That just makes Drew chop Mike even faster but he gets pulled off the top for a crash. Maria comes in and tries to keep Drew away from Gail, which goes about as well as you would expect. The tag brings in Gail for Eat Defeat to Bennett followed by a Claymore but Maria grabs a rollup on Gail with a handful of trunks for the pin at 5:07.

Rating: D+. This was a way to get Maria in the ring and at least Gail lost for a change. Of course that doesn’t mean anything because she’s always going to wind up getting the title back for a long reign because TNA thinks she’s the most amazing thing on the planet. The fact that everything Maria says is accurate doesn’t help things either. This division really needs a breath of air and Gail near the top isn’t going to do that any good.

We look back at Lashley turning heel to end last week’s show.

Here’s Lashley in the ring for an interview about his actions last week. He waited a long time to fight Angle because he’s the best and strongest around this company, which he proved last week. So why does he get overlooked for the Drew Galloways and the Jeff Hardys? Politics maybe? Not that it matters as Lashley came after Kurt to prove he belonged here. Lashley has no friends and wants no friends because he needs no friends. However, Josh Matthews is in his ring right now, so Lashley throws him into the corner. Dang I thought they wanted him to be a heel. Pope comes in for the save and gets beaten down as well, which the fans actually don’t like.

That’s their best idea to make him a heel? Have him beat up the most annoying announcer this side of Cole as a Miz fan? As usual, anytime Lashley talks, things go badly for him as there’s no charisma or any kind of an intimidating voice. The idea here is good but the execution was a disaster of course.

The Decay welcomes us to their black hole and promises a third person to fight against Beer Money and Edwards.

Jeremy Borash has replaced Pope on commentary.

Ethan Carter III congratulates Jeff Hardy for getting into the World Title match but Jeff says he’s winning the title for the Creatures.

Decay vs. Eddie Edwards/Beer Money

The partner is Rosemary, which should make for some interesting action. Steve jumps Storm from behind to start but it’s quickly off to Roode for two off a release gordbuster. Abyss comes in to start cleaning house by slamming Roode down, allowing him to chokeslam Steve onto Roode’s body for two. Rosemary gets the tag and hammers away for a bit before Roode avoids a Cannonball from Steve. The hot tag brings in Storm for his chance to clean house but Steve pulls Rosemary away from the double suplex. Instead Rosemary mists Edwards, allowing Steve to get the pin at 7:17.

Rating: D+. This did nothing for me as it was just two teams doing moves to each other for a few minutes until the ending. Decay is an idea but it’s something we’ve seen enough times before that it’s a bit hard to get behind. They’re definitely entertaining and freaky enough to get noticed but losing that title shot a few weeks back crippled their push.

Billy Corgan (You know him. I mean, you all read the internet so you know he has power here. It’s not like we ever need to TELL YOU THAT or anything.) tells Grado that TNA has come to a decision and will let him know the fate of the Feast or Fired case in the ring.

Matt and Reby accuse Dixie of adding Jeff to the match because she’s jealous. This earns them a new stipulation for the title match: no countout and no DQ. Aren’t all triple threats like that already?

We recap the King of the Mountain Title briefcase issue with TNA finally showing the footage of Eli Drake switching the briefcases. This was released on TNA’s Youtube page so of course TNA assumed we had all seen it. Corgan comes out and says it’s Drake’s case but Grado gets a new contract. Oh but it’s going to be above the ring in a ladder match after the break. BUILD THIS STUFF UP!

Eli Drake vs. Grado

The announcers try to figure out what’s on the line here as Drake hits Grado in the back with the ladder. A hard whip sends Eli into the ladder and Grado starts his comeback, only to have Jesse Godderz come out for the save. Cue Mahabali Shera for a save but the heels hit him in the back with the briefcase. Grado goes up the ladder but dives onto the pile for an unnecessary chance. Another attempt at the case is stopped by Drake so Grado takes him down with a huge electric chair, which is enough for Grado to pull down the contract at 7:07.

Rating: C. Ok and now what? Grado is back on the roster after never really being off and they blew off the thing in a ladder match on five minutes notice. This is the kind of stuff that gets on my nerves about TNA: they have all these matches and stories and they blow them off on the live shows to pop ratings but then they go to eternal rematches afterwards because they have nothing left to air. That’s way too hasty and it gets them in trouble a lot of the time.

Eric Young tells Bram that everyone is out to get him so they have to work together.

TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III

Matt is defending and we don’t even get big match intros. The challengers beat Matt down to start but it’s Ethan grabbing a rollup for two on Jeff. Carter drops both Hardys and sends them both to the floor as we take a break. Back with Ethan down on the floor after a Side Effect and but Jeff blocks a Twist of Fate. The Swanton is loaded up but here are Bram and Eric Young to pull Jeff down and piledrive him on the concrete. Jeff is taken out as Carter gets back in and hits his Stinger Splash, drawing out Spud and Tyrus for another save.

They’re quickly dispatched though, allowing Matt to kick Ethan low. The Twist of Fate is countered into the 1%er but Mike Bennett comes in (ENOUGH ALREADY!) to chair Carter in the back. That’s only good for two and the Twist of Fate gets the same. Bennett throws Carter to the floor and fights into the crowd with Bennett getting in another chair shot. Matt is ready to leave and shouts at the fans that he’s leaving as champion…..but here’s Galloway to cash in his briefcase as the triple threat is a no contest at 18:30.

Rating: D+. The run-ins were driving me insane here as they took away anything this could have gotten going. The major bright spot here though is that Carter didn’t get pinned. That should be a major moment and wasting it in a triple threat would have been a big waste. I’m really not a big fan of having people added to matches to make them a triple threat but TNA is in love with the idea and that’s what we were stuck with here.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Matt Hardy

The Claymore and Future Shock give Drew the title at 18 seconds.

Drew celebrates with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is TNA’s major TV problem showing its head again: there’s WAY too much being burned off in a single show and not enough over the coming weeks. You could have had Grado vs. Drake announced for next week, Jeff vs. Young go on last (assuming Jeff is healthy enough to compete) and the World Title match at a later date. Instead they threw all that together and didn’t even get a good show out of it. It’s not bad but WAY too much in a single night, which isn’t a good thing.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Eric Young – Swanton Bomb

Maria Kanellis/Mike Bennett b. Drew Galloway/Gail Kim – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Decay b. Eddie Edwards/Beer Money – Steve pinned Edwards after mist from Rosemary

Grado b. Eli Drake – Grado pulled down the contract

Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III vs. Jeff Hardy went to a no contest

Drew Galloway b. Matt Hardy – Future Shock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 1, 2016
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re getting close to the end of the UK tour and we have one more week before Kurt Angle’s farewell match. The big story here is Rockstar Spud turning on Ethan Carter III last week, costing Carter the TNA World Title against Matt Hardy. Tonight is going to be about Ethan’s revenge against Spud. Let’s get to it.

Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode

Angle starts in with armdrags and works on Roode’s wrist early on. Back up and a knee to the ribs drops Angle for a pair of two’s as they’re clearly going with a main event style formula here. Roode’s front suplex gets two more but Angle suplexes out of a chinlock. We hit the rolling Germans for a bit before the ankle lock goes on for the first time.

Roode kicks away because no one taps out to the first ankle lock and sends Angle into the post to set up the Crossface. Kurt reverses into the ankle lock which is countered into another Crossface, which is countered into the Angle Slam for two. The Roode Bomb gets the same but a second attempt is countered into the ankle lock to make Roode tap out at 8:38.

Rating: B-. Kurt’s Greatest Hits tour continues as he beats someone else who could mean something for TNA because Angle needs this extra dose of praise. That’s been the problem with this whole thing: it’s been about making sure Angle looks as amazing as he can, which is one of the worst things you can do when TNA is in the shape it’s in at the moment. But hey, it’s not like Angle has enough accolades already right? At least the match was good, albeit almost all finishing moves.

Post break, Roode praises Angle and James Storm comes out to do the same. Beer Money gets out the beer but give Angle (and his DUIs) a half gallon of milk instead. They had me worried there for a bit. Angle isn’t done yet either because he wants to see Beer Money vs. the Wolves. Cue the Wolves to praise Angle before accepting the match against Beer Money next week. Storm says polish those belts up.

Here are Matt Hardy and company because this show was actually entertaining for a little bit. Hardy brags about beating Ethan last week and promises that Ethan will never get another shot at the title. Tyrus is just laughably huge behind Matt here. Matt welcomes out Rockstar Spud, now in a leather jacket because he’s a villain and villains wear leather jackets.

Spud doesn’t like the idea of his English fans cheering for Carter and asks for a show of hands of the people there for him when he needed help. We get some praise for Matt, who is the champion this company needs and deserves. Spud says they’ve gotten rid of the cancer but here’s Carter to interrupt. House is quickly cleaned and Spud is left alone with Ethan. The villains runs off but Carter challenges Spud to a fight tonight.

Gail Kim is going to call out Maria.

Post break Dixie Carter yells at Matt and company (that needs a name and I’m sure TNA has 14 of them ready since they haven’t had a heel stable in long enough) and refuses to sanction Ethan vs. Spud for later. They’ll still have the match but it’s going to be unsanctioned. Oh dang they’re fighting without TNA approval. That’s like, scary.

Abyss vs. Jimmy Havoc

No DQ. Havoc goes right after Abyss to start and knocks him to the floor, only to have a trashcan pelted at his head. Abyss sends him into the apron and busts out the cheese grater but Havoc gets his hands up just in time. A table takes too long to set up though and Havoc gets in three trashcan shots to the head for a near fall.

Rosemary offers a distraction though and Abyss throws a chair at Havoc, knocking him off the top and through a table at ringside. The Janice shot misses and Havoc dropkicks Abyss through the table for two. Jimmy brings in the barbed wire board but charges into the Black Hole Slam onto it for the pin at 6:02.

Rating: C-. “Hey! We signed this awesome British wrestler for this tour and we’ve got him in Abyss’ signature match. Let’s put Abyss over!” Such is life in TNA where they manage to make all of the British wrestlers either a heel or a loser because they think people still want to see Abyss doing his hardcore stuff. I’m so sick of these hardcore matches and now they’re not even getting enough time to go anywhere. Bad match and annoying result.

Mike Bennett promises to take care of Drew Galloway tonight.

Carter is going to destroy Spud later.

Here’s Gail Kim to call out Maria. We get the exact same speech about THIS IS WRESTLING and WRESTLING IS SERIOUS that has bored fans every single time over the years but they keep having Gail say the same thing because Gail has no character and is one of the least interesting wrestlers of all time. Anyway she calls out Maria who won’t get in the ring because she has something to say.

Maria talks about Gail wanting to be famous because she married a celebrity chef and had the wedding televised. We hear about Maria being famous for being on Celebrity Apprentice, being in Playboy and working with Donald Trump. However she’s a lady so there won’t be a fight here tonight. Gail goes after her but gets jumped by Jade.

Bram and Eric Young are here for Young’s King of the Mountain Title defense but first of all they have to insult the British fans because none of them know how to fight. Young issues an open challenge.

King of the Mountain Title: Big Damo vs. Eric Young

Damo is a huge hairy man who looks like a cross between Rusev and a lumberjack while weighing well over 300lbs. A running dropkick puts Young on the floor (Josh: “People are already making memes about it!”) and Damo drops an elbow back inside. Back up and Young shrugs off some right hands, only to get slammed down for a backsplash. A powerbomb and another elbow get two on Young, followed by a cross body to crush him again. Damo tries another backsplash but hits knees, setting up the piledriver to retain the title at 3:40.

Rating: D+. Damo looked good but are you impressed with Young yet? I mean he’s crazy and he has a piledriver so that makes him an interesting wrestler and character for sure. As usual, let’s make sure the person who might be a future star for TNA gets beaten by the guy who has been around forever because that will keep the British crowds hot.

Drew promises to make Bennett tap tonight.

Drew Galloway vs. Mike Bennett

Galloway stomps him down in the corner to start but Maria offers a distraction. That goes nowhere though as Mike gets kicked in the face and sent outside for a throat first drop across the barricade. Bennett is sent into the post again but he gets in a shot to Drew’s taped up knee. The more wrestling I watch the more I agree with the “don’t tape it up” announcers because it really is too obvious.

Back in and Drew gets kicked in the face for two and we hit the cross arm choke. Even more kicks to the head have Drew in trouble but he Hulks Up and punches Bennett down. A middle rope clothesline looks to set up the Future Shock but Drew settles for a spinebuster instead. Mike gets in a cutter for two but the Miracle in Progress is countered into the Celtic Cross. There’s the Claymore followed by the Iron Maiden (Drew’s crossface) but Maria breaks it up. Mike grabs a rollup and a handful of trunks at 7:56.

Rating: C. Well at least the right guy won (I think). Bennett could be something interesting but I’m not sure if they should be getting there by having him beat Drew Galloway. Much like WWE, they can’t quite get this whole PUSH SOMEONE NEW right because they knock someone off to get someone else over. TNA is a bit easier to accept though as they barely have anyone left on their roster.

Matt gives Spud a pep talk.

Grado promises proof that he was screwed.

We look back at Angle vs. Lashley I.

Preview for next week’s show.

Rockstar Spud vs. Ethan Carter III

Street fight, meaning our second anything goes match of the night. We see Carter coming to the ring from the back when Tyrus jumps him. Carter beats him back down but Matt runs in as well, only to have Carter shove them into the back of a truck and lock the door. This is joined in progress after a break with Ethan knocking him down the aisle and throwing him into the barricade.

They get inside for the first time with Spud choking with his shirt but Carter kicks him in the shoulder for a comeback. Back to the floor now and Spud tries a running chair shot to the face but Carter stops him with a raised boot. Carter hits the TK3 and loads up a table. Spud can’t crawl away in time and has to settle for a low blow. Some left hands don’t do much for Spud as Carter grabs the hand and powerbombs him through the table. A cobra clutch with a bodyscissors has Spud tapping until he taps out. Referees come out to break it up to end the show as this is a no contest (remember not an actual match) at about 9:00.

Rating: D+. This was as entertaining as Carter squashing Spud for nine minutes was going to be. As usual, the problem here is TNA turning someone heel to advance a storyline and making them a lackey for whoever the big heel is at the moment. Yeah Spud is a heel now and he just got crushed but at least Matt is still World Champion, minus an opponent of course.

Overall Rating: C. Not their best effort tonight but at least it’s a big step up over the previous few weeks. The problem here is the same one they’ve had in a long time now: it seems to be more about setting up either a feud we’ve seen before or about praising the old guard who are either leaving or barely around anymore. Unfortunately, I have no real reason to believe TNA will keep things going as they have almost no ability to maintain momentum.

Results

Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode – Ankle lock

Abyss b. Jimmy Havoc – Black Hole Slam onto a barbed wire board

Eric Young b. Big Damo – Piledriver

Mike Bennett b. Drew Galloway – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Ethan Carter III vs. Rockstar Spud went to a no contest

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