Smackdown – May 12, 2006: They Aren’t Helping Themselves

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 12, 2006
Location: ipayoneCenter, San Diego, California
Attendance: 11,700
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re on the way to Judgment Day and that means it’s going to be a bad night for Rey Mysterio. Last week he got destroyed by Mark Henry and tonight it’s probably going to be the Great Khali. But hey, at least he can beat JBL at the pay per view and that makes up for everything, right? Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Rey Mysterio becoming the underdog World Champion and getting destroyed by Mark Henry last week. Tonight it gets even worse with Great Khali.

Here’s John Bradshaw Layfield, who set up Mysterio’s battles with the giants, to get things going. He talks about how Rey is “a tough little Mexican fighter” and worries that Rey is going to take his innertube back to Mexico. The fans stop to chant for Eddie, who JBL agrees was great, but JBL was greater. Then he took the US Title from Chris Benoit and at Judgment Day he’s going to be the first ever double champion.

After that, he’ll offer Rey’s family a job. Dominik can shine his boots, Rey’s wife can do his dishes in a short little Latino dress, but Rey can sell drugs, get into prostitution or work a donkey show in Tijuana. Rey finally comes out to clear the ring in a hurry. JBL can say these things with some conviction, but dang the times have changed.

Super Crazy vs. Nunzio vs. Kid Kash

The winner gets Gregory Helms, on commentary, for the Cruiserweight Title at the pay per view. It’s a brawl to start with Crazy being sent outside and Nunzio being backdropped out after him. Everyone gets back in for an exchange of rollups for two each until Kash’s clothesline gets two on Nunzio. Kash kicks Nunzio off the top and hits his moonsault for two more with Crazy making the save. Crazy covers both of them for a near fall each and Nunzio makes his own save. Nunzio loads Crazy up in a Doomsday Device but Crazy victory rolls him for the pin as Kash misses the high crossbody.

Rating: C. It was fine enough action but there was no hiding how unimportant everything they were doing was here. The Cruiserweight Title hasn’t meant anything in years and you can see how far it is falling almost every week. Points for trying to do something and having an action packed match, but this was the popcorn/nacho portion of the show.

The returning Kurt Angle storms into Teddy Long’s office to demand a match with Mark Henry. Long says no because Angle isn’t cleared so Angle grabs him by the jacket. The match is on for the pay per view.

Gymini vs. Mike Wellington/Joey Ryan

The Gymini are Jesse and Jake, while Ryan (yes that Ryan) has belt loops on his trunks. Jake powers Wellington to the apron to start and hits a clothesline back inside. Ryan comes in and gets kicked in the head, followed by a double shoulder for a bonus. Some elbows to the back of the head set up a chinlock, with Jesse pulling the hair. Wellington gets slammed onto Ryan and a double toss into the air for a big crash finishes Ryan without much effort.

Rating: D+. There is something rather cathartic about seeing Joey Ryan getting beaten up. Total destruction here of course as WWE has almost always known how to push two big monsters like this. I’m not sure how far they can go from here, but they can do this match well enough, especially given how short it was.

Various wrestlers like the See No Evil premiere, with Kurt Angle having to hide behind Viscera.

We look at Finlay beating Chris Benoit to make the semifinals of the King of the Ring.

Here are Booker T. and Sharmell for a chat. Booker is upset that Kurt Angle was thrown out of the tournament because he was looking forward to the match. He doesn’t want a forfeit so Angle can come out and face him right now (Angle was escorted from the building after talking to Long). Booker even gives him a ten count, with a pause for one last beg at nine, before declaring himself the winner. The celebration is on, complete with spinning Sharmell around and a Spinarooni.

King of the Ring Semifinals: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

They fight over a lockup to start with Lashley eventually powering him into the corner. Lashley takes him down with an explosive single leg but Finlay is back up with a clothesline. The chinlock goes on for a good while before Lashley is back up with a big boot. A gorilla press gutbuster has Finlay in trouble and a running clothesline in the corner rocks him again.

Some forearms gets Finlay out of trouble though and he chokes with the ring skirt. The chinlock goes on again and a pull of the trunks takes Lashley down again. Cue Booker and Sharmell, with the former sitting on the throne to see Lashley get his knees up to stop a splash. Lashley gets caught in the ring skirt for another beating though and we take a break.

Back with Finlay working on an arm, with an elbow into the shoulder for a bonus. A running shoulder gives Finlay two but Lashley gets fired up and snap off the overhead belly to belly. The running powerslam connects but Finlay blocks the spear with a boot. Finlay throws in the chair and grabs the Shillelagh, the latter of which is taken away. The referee is dumb enough to get rid of it, allowing Finlay to get in a chair shot. Lashley shrugs it off and hits the spear for the pin.

Rating: C+. The chinlocks took something out of this but they made Lashley look like a monster and that’s the important part. Lashley is showing some different offense out there most weeks and that’s an encouraging sign for someone who could do three moves and get by on his look alone. Finlay continues to be a nice gem and they worked well together.

Post match Lashley tells Booker to get out of his chair before he gets thrown out.

Here are MNM for a chat. Johnny Nitro says they’re the hot team and the sexiest champions of the century. They don’t like Paul London and Brian Kendrick getting in their way, which is why they got three straight Snapshots last week. After we see a clip from last week, Melina talks about how those punks are just trying to get a rub from the champs. Cue Jillian Hall, who talks about beating up Melina at the makeup table. Melina says Jillian looked better with the growth on her face. The fight is almost on but here are London and Kendrick to pants the champs. Hall rips off Melina’s skirt too and the good guys run.

Mark Henry vs. Paul Burchill

We get the debut of Henry’s signature song. Henry clotheslines him down and hits a kick in the ribs as this is feeling squashish. Burchill is tossed outside in a heap (with one hand) and Henry throws him back inside for a bonus. There’s the running splash in the corner and a second one against the post has Burchill pretty much done. Back in and Henry hits two more splashes, grabs the mic to say Kurt Angle is getting the same thing. The World’s Strongest Slam is good for the pin.

Rating: D. This was little more than a way to keep Henry warm before his match with Angle. It was nothing we hadn’t seen before but there was only so much you can get out of this version of Henry. Also, so much for Burchill, but how long was a Pirates of the Caribbean tribute character going to last?

Tatanka is still becoming a Lakota warrior.

Big Vito says he and Nunzio are going out tonight. Nunzio needs to go get a shower but Orlando Jordan cuts him off, saying that he saw someone who looked a lot like Vito in drag in a club in London. Nunzio doesn’t buy it.

Judgment Day rundown.

Rey Mysterio vs. Great Khali

Non-title, JBL is on commentary, and Cole keeps mentioning that Mysterio’s friends and family are here because it’s his hometown. Before Khali comes out, Rey dives onto JBL but here is Khali (with Daivari) to cut things off. Mysterio gets in Khali’s…uh, chest, and the EDDIE chants start up again. Khali throws him outside in a hurry and JBL turns up the trash talk to an eleven. Rey gets knocked off the apron again and a springboard dropkick hurts Mysterio more than Khali. Mysterio is thrown outside for a third time with JBL getting in a cheap shot. Back in and the double arm chokeslam finishes Rey in short order.

Rating: F. What do you even say here? This came off as more of Vince and WWE being annoyed at the fans for wanting something and punishing them for it after giving them what they asked for. They do this with so many of their titles and then wonder why it isn’t as important or why the fans are walking away. It made Mysterio, who could potentially draw some money, look like nothing and Khali isn’t likely to get a title shot anytime soon, but at least they advanced Mysterio vs. JBL, which I’m sure people will be flocking to pay for. I remember thinking this was stupid in 2006 and it is even worse now, which doesn’t surprise me.

Post match JBL gets in Rey’s face to talk about how he let everyone down. JBL has another opponent for next week. Tick tock. JBL shoves him to the floor to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Well that happened. This was not WWE’s finest hour as they don’t seem to have a clue about what they want to do here so the solution is to squash the World Champion on back to back weeks. It was a rough sit as this show doesn’t exactly have star power and they are going out of their way to damage the star power that they do have. Bad show here, and WWE isn’t helping itself.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – May 5, 2006: The Wrestling Oasis

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 5, 2006
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time to start building towards the next Smackdown pay pr view as Backlash has come and gone. Therefore, it’s time for Rey Mysterio to continue looking like the weakest World Champion in history, which kind of defeats the purpose of making him the World Champion in the first place. It’s rather sad to see but that’s what you get around here sometimes. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event where Kurt Angle had Rey Mysterio in a lot of trouble until Mark Henry ran in for the DQ. Henry destroyed Angle after the match.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Mysterio, who is officially defending against JBL at Judgment Day, to get things going. Rey talks about how awesome it is to be champion every day and he’s loving it all. He was ready to tap last week…and here’s JBL to interrupt. JBL says it isn’t over yet amigo but at Judgment Day, it’s the American hero vs. the masked illegal immigrant. There is a place in JBL’s America for illegals though, because just last week there was a mass walkout to shut down all kinds of things across the country.

The fans chant for EDDIE, with JBL saying how it’s always either for EDDIE or JBL because no one cares about Rey. Anyway, there are always places for illegals to take out his garbage or clean his house. It’s the size of the fight in the dog. Rey asks if JBL is calling his people dogs. JBL: “You’re not a dog Rey. You’re a Mexican.” JBL goes on a rant about Rey living off of Eddie’s legacy so Rey says he’ll fight anyone, anytime. That works for JBL, so Rey can fight this man tonight. Cue Mark Henry, who just happened to be standing behind the curtain I guess. The staredown is on and I don’t see this going well. Again.

Booker T. vs. Gunner Scott

Rematch from three weeks ago where Scott scored a big upset. During the entrances, Cole announces that Booker is going to the King of the Ring finals because Kurt Angle has injured ribs and can’t compete. Booker runs him over to start and elbows his way out of a hammerlock attempt. Scott strikes his way out of the corner, only to get caught in a hot shot. We hit the chinlock but Scott fights up with more strikes. Some suplexes have Booker in trouble until he hits the hook kick to the face. A Sharmell distraction sets up the ax kick to give Booker the pin.

Rating: D+. This was a way to right the ship after Booker lost a few weeks back and doesn’t get the King of the Ring match. I’m not sure how much Booker needed the win, but at least he gets some momentum heading into a bigger match. Booker could make for a pretty good king, and the fact that he is talking about it more than anyone else would suggest he is a likely candidate.

Post match, Booker is proud of his win over Gunner somebody and promises to win the tournament. His subjects need to get used to bowing down.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. MNM

MNM is…not defending here as they jump London and Kendrick from behind. Kendrick takes a pair of Snapshots and there’s no match.

Video on Tatanka entering a Lakota sweat lodge to be purified so he can become a warrior.

Great Khali and Daivari come in to see Teddy Long, who has a contract signed by Undertaker for a match at Judgment Day. Khali growls a bit.

King of the Ring First Round: Finlay vs. Chris Benoit

The winner gets Lashley in the semifinals. Finlay drives him into the corner to start but doesn’t get very far. Benoit gets it to the mat for a headlock and then switches to an armbar to counter Finlay’s counter. Finlay winds up mounting Benoit, who punches his way from the mat to get out. Back up and they go nose to nose until Finlay starts slugging away to knock Benoit into the corner.

That earns him a leg takedown with Benoit cranking on the leg. The hold sends Finlay over to the ropes for the break as the chess game continues. Benoit gets sent shoulder first into the post and it’s time to work on an armbar. Some shoulders are driven into Benoit’s shoulder so he sweeps the leg for a failed Sharpshooter attempt. The top of Benoit’s head has been busted open (not that badly) and he can’t get the Crossface t make things even worse.

The release German suplex works though and Finlay comes up holding his shoulder. It’s so banged up that he rolls outside and throws in some chairs as we take a break. Back with Benoit getting two more off a snap suplex but getting sent chest first into the buckle. We hit the chinlock until Benoit jawbreaks his way to freedom, only to get pulled down into another facelock.

Finlay sends him into the corner but misses a charge into the post. The rolling German suplexes set up a missed Swan Dive but Benoit ducks a Shillelagh shot. With the referee getting rid of the club, Finlay gets in a chair shot, setting up the Celtic Cross for the pin to advance.

Rating: B. This was a good example of a match with two guys beating the heck out of each other for a long time and it was rather entertaining. They kept Benoit looking strong in defeat and Finlay gets one of the biggest wins of his WWE tenure. Sometimes you need two people beating the fire out of each other until one of them is done and that’s what you got.

Gymini vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Funaki

Simon Dean fires the Gymini up before the bell. We’ll say Gymini #1 puts Funaki on the top rope to start and #2 pulls him down to the floor in a crash. Back in and #2 stomps in the corner and we hit the chinlock. There’s a butterfly suplex to drop Funaki again but this time he rolls over and brings in Scotty, who gets suplexed down in a hurry. The Crash Diet (kind of a double powerbomb) finishes Scotty in a hurry.

Rating: D+. Total squash here, but does beating up Scotty and Funaki really mean that much? You can only get so far off a match like this and it feels like the Gymini debuted months ago. It isn’t a hard gimmick to make work, but they’re managing to make two muscleheaded twins look like a big waste of time. That’s hard to do.

Video on See No Evil.

Bobby Lashley comes in to see Booker T., who is in a towel. They both promise violence.

Super Crazy vs. Kid Kash vs. Nunzio

The winner gets a title shot at the pay per view. They start with the rapid exchange of shots to the face until the Sicilian Slice gets two on Crazy. Kash and Nunzio are sent outside for the top rope Lionsault from Crazy….and here’s Great Khali to destroy them all for the no contest.

Khali destroys them all for a bonus feature.

Raw Rebound.

Judgment Day rundown, with Khali having accepted Undertaker’s challenge and Melina vs. Jillian Hall confirmed.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry

Non-title and JBL is on commentary. After the same video that opened the show, we’re ready to go. Rey starts dodging around to start but nearly gets caught after a chase around the ring. Back in and Henry slugs away, only to get knocked down in a hurry. JBL goes after Rey on the floor and gets sent over the announcers’ table.

Back in and Rey’s springboard is knocked out of the air, which JBL says is like Henry eating Rey like a $3.99 pizza buffet. Cole and JBL argue about whether underdogs or rich people built America as Henry runs Rey over. Some missed charges in the put Henry down and Rey reverses the World’s Strongest Slam. A dropkick to the back sets up the 619 but Henry pulls him out of the air for the World’s Strongest Slam and the pin.

Rating: D+. And so one of the lamest World Title reigns of all time gets to continue because WWE thinks this is what you’re supposed to do to make fans pay for a big show at the end of the month. If you don’t want Mysterio as the champion, just have him drop the title already, because this isn’t helping the title in the slightest. I guess Vince found it funny or something though and that’s all we’ve got.

Post match Henry drags him up to the stage and loads up a splash off the set but JBL runs up to say no. JBL promises him the first title shot when he beats Rey, because if Henry crushes him then there’s no title shot. With Rey still down, JBL makes Mysterio vs. Great Khali for next week in Rey’s hometown of San Diego.

Overall Rating: D. What a strange show. This was a bunch of pretty bad matches with one really good one stuck in the middle. That’s not enough to save the rest of it though and we get this kind of a show, which only left me wanting to get through the pay per view so we can move on to anything else.

So far JBL has humiliated Rey, pointed out that no one really likes him, or even chant for him for that matter. Then you have Rey ready to lose to Angle and then actually lose to Henry here. Imagine any other face World Champion ever being presented like that and see how fast you get a quick headache. Benoit vs. Finlay was good, but that was nowhere near enough to save us from the really bad main event angle.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – April 28, 2006: Focus People, Focus

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 28, 2006
Location: Wembley Arena, London, England
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s time for a huge main event in 2/3 of a Wrestlemania rematch. This time around we have Rey Mysterio defending the World Title against Kurt Angle, with JBL waiting on the winner. Other than that it’s time to continue the King of the Ring as we continue the lull before the next Smackdown only pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video is about Mysterio vs. Angle. Does it need to be anything else?

Opening sequence.

Here’s JBL, in a Rolls Royce, for a US Title defense and a chat. And yes he has an American flag in hand and an American flag jacket. Before the match, JBL brags about America and how much England needs them. If British Prime Minister Tony Blair is George W. Bush’s poodle, then every British person is America’s stepchild.

Therefore, tonight JBL is throwing them a bone by giving an Englishman a US Title shot. How tough can the challenger be though? After all, the British follow a queen, which has JBL on his knees in laughter. The fans chant for ENGLAND but JBL says an American is talking. He wants everyone to salute his jacket but his opponent cuts him off.

US Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. William Regal

Regal, in regular gear this week, is challenging and promises to show JBL what British people think of Americans. The beating is on in a hurry with Regal choking JBL with the jacket and firing off some shots to the face. The fans are all behind Regal and an uppercut puts JBL on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Regal kneeing away but getting punched in the face to cut things off. Regal is bleeding from the ear so JBL goes after it, followed by a sleeper. A belly to back gets Regal out of trouble but JBL kicks him in the face. JBL’s swinging neckbreaker and DDT combine for two but Regal is back with an exploder suplex for a heck of a reaction. Regal grabs the Regal Stretch but JBL gets two fingers on the rope. JBL goes more villain with a thumb to the eye and the Clothesline From JBL retains the title.

Rating: C+. This was a nice match as they didn’t bother with anything tricky and just had two guys hit each other for ten minutes. Regal fighting for his country and getting the huge face pops made for some weird visuals (not in a bad way) and it wouldn’t have been completely insane to see a fluke title change. You could tell Regal was fired up here and it helped a lot.

JBL’s goofy grin while he hugs the title makes it that much better.

Booker T. and Sharmell are ready for Booker’s match with Kurt Angle in the King of the Ring but he doesn’t like being asked about Angle vs. Mysterio. Gunner Scott comes in to remind Booker of the upset win a few weeks ago. Booker agrees to face Scott again….but not tonight because Booker has a chest cold and a sinus infection. He’ll find Scott an opponent who can sop him up like a biscuit.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Rock to win his first WWF Title at No Mercy 2000.

Video on Tatanka’s path to become the new warrior of his Native American tribe. I can appreciate trying to make something out of someone, but Tatanka in 2006 wasn’t going to be the answer, especially with something like this.

MNM/Gregory Helms vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Super Crazy

It’s a brawl to start with the villains being sent outside for the big triple dive. Kendrick gets shoved off the top back inside though and Mercury takes over with some quick near falls. A backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gets two and Nitro adds his breakdancing legdrop for the same. Helms grabs the quickly broken abdominal stretch and Kendrick gets over for the hot tag to London. Everything breaks down and London rolls Helms up for the pin. Melina is stunned, though that might be due to Tony Chimmel using the high pitched SUPER for Super Crazy.

Rating: C. They got a lot of stuff into a sub four minute match and that’s perfectly fine. I’m not sure if Crazy is supposed to be the next challenger for Helms or if he was just someone put out there to fill in a spot, but this was all about MNM vs. London and Kendrick anyway. They kept this short and got to the point, which is all they needed to do.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Angle beats Austin at Unforgiven 2001.

Melina yells at MNM for losing and insults Jillian Hall for getting fired last week. She offers Hall a job doing her makeup and throws said makeup on her. The catfight is on with makeup being used in various ways.

Bobby Lashley wants to be King of the Ring because of what it has meant for everyone else. He really doesn’t need to be talking.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Big Show at Armageddon 2004.

King of the Ring First Round: Mark Henry vs. Bobby Lashley

Henry shoves him around a few times to start and Lashley isn’t sure about this one. A headbutt puts Lashley down again and there’s a hard whip into the corner. Henry cuts off the comeback with a rather hard clothesline, with Cole telling us to go outside and run into our house to see what that feels like. Hopefully no one with a house boat follows that advice.

A backbreaker plants Lashley again but Henry misses a charge allowing the comeback to start. Lashley hits the clotheslines and the impressive slam but Henry powers out of the Dominator. Henry misses a charge and gets low bridged over the ropes to the floor, giving Lashley the countout win.

Rating: C-. That’s about as smart of a way to do this as they could have had, even if it looked like Henry slipped on a banana peel to end things. Henry is still a monster who shouldn’t be losing very often, so aside from not having him in the tournament, the only way to go was a countout or DQ. Lashley was thrown around a bit, but that slam felt like a pretty impressive moment.

Post match Henry beats Lashley up some more, including a splash against the post to bang up his ribs.

Rey Mysterio is asked about always being seen as an underdog. Tonight he is the underdog again but he knows he has to stay away from the ankle lock. He’ll give it his best but if he loses, it was well worth it. This has been the latest moment of WWE making sure you know Rey is in way over his head.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt beats Brock Lesnar and the Big Show to win the title at Vengeance 2003.

Booker T., complete with chest cold, is here with Sharmell to announce Gunner Scott’s opponent. After using some medicine, here we go.

Finlay vs. Gunner Scott

Booker and Sharmell sit in on commentary. Finlay headlocks him down to start and pulls on the arms with his boot on Gunner’s head. Back up and Gunner hits a dropkick tot he floor but the baseball slide gets caught in the ring skirt so the beating can be on. Scott fights back and hits an elbow to the face, followed by a belly to belly for two. They fight outside where Booker gets in a cheap shot, allowing Finlay to hit the Air Raid Crash for the pin.

Rating: D+. Scott feels like their latest attempt to make someone out of nothing and it’s too early to know if that is going to be a success. Booker having another injury/condition to keep him out of the ring is a bit of a stretch after he was just injured for so long, but his talking is making up for it. On top of that, it’s nice to see Finlay being featured again as he’s doing well in his role as the tough villain.

Post match the beatdown is on until Chris Benoit runs in for the save.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari for a chat. Daivari says that is it true: Great Khali has dominated the Undertaker and destroyed his spirit. Undertaker is afraid of Khali, who yells a lot to emphasize his point. Krystal runs away to wrap things up.

Kurt Angle’s Winner’s Circle: Kurt wins a battle royal to become champion again.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending and commentary makes it clear that he is the underdog. Again. Angle drops to a knee as Rey circles him, meaning it’s an early takedown to put the champ down. An uppercut cuts Rey down again but he’s back up with right hands in the corner. That just earns Rey a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and a regular version gets two. Rey charges into a belly to belly to the floor and we take an early break.

Back with Rey caught in a chinlock with a bodyscissors. That’s broken up so Rey has to escape the Angle Slam and kick Angle in the head for a double knockdown. The 619 is blocked so Rey is right back with a sitout bulldog for two, allowing Cole to call Rey the underdog again. Another Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for two more but Angle runs the corner for a superplex.

Back up and Angle misses a charge hard into the post and falls out to the floor. That means Rey can hit a top rope Fameasser on the way back in for another near fall, but Angle flips him over with a release German suplex. The Angle Slam is countered for a third time and the 619 connects this time. Angle counters the West Coast Pop into the ankle lock but here’s Mark Henry to jump Angle for the DQ.

Rating: B-. They were having a good match and I can live with the DQ ending, but man alive this “Rey is such an underdog” is getting old in a hurry. What makes it even worse is that it comes after the last three months being about Eddie Guerrero, making Rey feel like a high school student who is in over his head in a bad 90s action comedy. Rey is an underdog, but there’s a difference between someone Barry Horowitz’s 1995 winning streak and one of the best cruiserweights of all time. As usual, WWE needs to lighten up on beating us over the head and I don’t think they’ll get that.

Post match Henry crushes Angle against the post and puts him on a table. The running splash from the apron destroys Kurt to end the show as Rey, again, is forgotten.

Overall Rating: C. As usual, the British shows are always a little off but there was only so much they could do without having anything to build towards at the moment. The next pay per view will start to come into focus soon and Angle vs. Mysterio did feel big, but they didn’t help themselves with making Rey seem like a loser who has gotten lucky. The show did go by very quickly though and nothing was bad, so it was hardly a difficult sit. Just get them something to focus on and we can move on to something a little better.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – April 7, 2006: The Other Followup Show

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 7, 2006
Location: Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the fallout show for Wrestlemania and that could make for an interesting night. Raw was pretty good this week and I’m wondering if they are going to follow the same path. There are a few ways to go with this one and Smackdown could use a boost after some fairly weak Wrestlemania build. Let’s get to it.

Here is Wrestlemania if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. MNM

Non-title and here are London and Kendrick to pick Melina up during the splits entrance for a little change of pace. Nitro gets elbowed in the face to start and Mercury is knocked off the apron. A headscissors into a dropkick gets two on Nitro but Kendrick is sent outside in a big crash. Back in and Nitro stomps away as the champs take over for the first time. Kendrick is sent crashing outside again and this time Melina rakes the eyes because she’s rather good at being evil.

Back in again and the breakdancing legdrop hits Kendrick but he manages a small package for a very delayed two. Nitro chokes on the rope and Melina gets in some choking, followed by Mercury coming in for four straight near falls. The fans want London and get him as he comes in to break up a cover, though I don’t think that’s what they meant. Back up and Kendrick gets over for the tag to London, but the referee didn’t see it for the old classic.

The double stomping is on but Kendrick rolls between them and makes the hot tag to London. House is cleaned and the Dropsault gets two on Mercury. Melina gets up on the apron to knock London into a rollup for two but Kendrick breaks up the Snapshot. London gets a VERY close two off a sunset flip but Nitro breaks up the 450. The Snapshot is broken up again though and London grabs a cradle for the pin.

Rating: B-. Dang this could have been a heck of a title change but the big deal here is finally having a fresh team to come after the titles. Well a fresh team that people might actually like that is. By this point, MNM’s title reign means nothing whatsoever but it could be a nice moment when they finally drop the things, despite what all the losses have done to them.

A very excited Booker T. and Sharmell come in to see Teddy Long. Teddy doesn’t get it and reminds them what happened at Wrestlemania. The difference though is Booker now has a restraining order against Boogeyman and if he comes within 100ft….Long goes to jail?

We look at Rey Mysterio winning the Royal Rumble.

Booker T. vs. Gunner Scott

Scott, better known as Brent Albright, is debuting. Booker hammers on him a bit to start but gets taken down with a drop toehold, much to his surprise. Some knees to the ribs set up a chinlock on Scott, which is broken up in a hurry. Booker kicks him in the face and there’s a spinebuster….followed by the Boogeyman’s music. Scott uses the distraction to grab a rollup pin.

Post match here’s Teddy Long to say that must have been a miscue. He raises Scott’s hand to rub it in.

We look at Randy Orton beating Rey Mysterio at No Way Out, plus Mysterio being added back into the Wrestlemania main event anyway.

Scott is very pleased with his win and Chris Benoit comes up to congratulate him.

Chris Benoit vs. Simon Dean

Benoit’s music hits while Dean is still on his scooter and panic sets in quickly. They go inside to start the proper beating and it’s a belly to back suplex into a hard elbow. Dean gets him into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs and a bulldog but the fans are all over him. The chinlock is broken up in a hurry and Benoit rolls the German suplexes into the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: D+. It was short and to the point, which was nice as it’s fun to see Dean get beaten up. This was a fine little way to get Benoit back on his feet after the loss on Sunday, which is where you can use someone like Dean rather effectively. Benoit is someone you can heat up in a hurry and they did it here in the same way they always did: with a nasty beating and a good looking Crossface.

Post match we get a video invitation to join JBL for his huge US Title celebration next week.

We look at Mysterio winning the title on Sunday.

Kurt Angle growls a lot and slaps Randy Orton in the face.

Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending. They stare at each other for a good bit to start and the EDDIE chants are on again. Rey gets back into the corner but comes out with a headlock, which is reversed into a headscissors on the mat. That’s broken up as well but Orton is back up with a forearm to the back. An uppercut from his knees gives Orton two and we’re already in the chinlock. Rey fights up and the wheelbarrow bulldog is quickly countered with a faceplant so the chinlock can go on again.

A headscissors gets Rey out of trouble and sends Orton outside, meaning it’s the big springboard seated senton to the floor. Orton gets pummeled in the corner but knocks Rey right back down and grabs another chinlock. Rey fights up again and gets to the apron but the springboard is countered with a dropkick to the floor (that looked good). We take a break and come back with Rey in probably the sixth chinlock so far. A faceplant out of the corner plants Rey for two more and we’re in another chinlock.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Orton does the dive onto a raised book which was only designed to dive into a raised boot. Rey hits the springboard seated senton and a springboard moonsault into a reverse DDT gets two. Rey goes up but gets dropkicked out of the air for two more. One heck of a clothesline drops Rey again but Orton’s charge hits the post. Rey mixes it up a bit with a 619 in the corner, setting up the regular version. Dropping The Dime retains the title.

Rating: C+. This got a lot better once Orton dropped the chinlocks. He probably used eight or nine during the match, which is more than a lot of people are going to use in a month. There was no reason to believe that the title was changing here and Mysterio pinning Orton clean is far from a stretch. Cut out five (or more) of those chinlocks and thisi s a much better match but what we got worked well.

Palmer Cannon says the following views are not those of WWE.

Miz torments WWE headquarters.

Mysterio thanks everyone who believed in him from day one and dreams do come true. He is ready to defend against everyone but for now he wants to thank his family, who are here with him.

William Regal comes up to Paul Burchill and complains about the pirate garb. They have a match next and we get a bet with the winner getting to chose how the winner dresses. Burchill thinks Regal will make a lovely buxom wench.

Paul Burchill vs. William Regal

Regal goes to the eyes to start but loses a slugout. They uppercut it out until Regal throws him down with a half nelson suplex. We hit the chinlock (Orton fan) but Burchill suplexes his way to freedom and the C4 finishes Regal.

Rating: D+. This didn’t get much time but Regal continues to be able to make something out of nothing. He was fighting as he usually would for the sake of turning Burchill back into a normal looking human. That isn’t something that should warrant something so serious but Regal made it work, which is quite impressive.

Wrestlemania XXIII is in Detroit.

Teddy Long announces the return of the King of the Ring. The first match: Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Before the match, Henry says he will never be the same after Wrestlemania because he shouldn’t be locked in a casket. When he was in the box, he had a vision of Undertaker’s future, which brings us here. Henry jumps him to start but Undertaker sends him into the corner. Cole says a headbutt from Henry is like a typewriter to the head, because people know what it is like to have a typewriter to the head. A big shove puts Undertaker down again but he’s back up with a big boot to the floor. There’s the apron legdrop…and here are Daivari and the debuting Great Khali. Undertaker goes after him and we’ll say that’s the match.

Post match Undertaker hits Khali in the face a few times but Khali (not named) chops him down. Some headbutts rock Undertaker and Khali rips a turnbuckle pad off (giving us some stuffing to make me think about George Steele) to ram Undertaker in. The big posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. This would have been in between a C and C+ if that was possible as the show was just slightly more hit than miss. Khali debuting felt like an important moment and it means that we don’t have to see Undertaker vs. Henry again. Other than that, Rey vs. Orton was fine enough and they set things up for the future, including the King of the Ring being set up. Not a bad show, but it was only so good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 31, 2006: The One Time A Year

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 31, 2006
Location: Kemper Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and that’s probably the best thing that can happen to Smackdown at the moment. The blue matches are already set and have been for a good while. That has left us with some rather weak shows on the way to Chicago but tonight is the last stop. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Randy Orton causing issues before Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle.

Here is Mysterio to open things up. He wastes no time this week and calls out Orton right now but here’s Angle instead. Angle wants Orton tonight so he can beat him here and then do it again at Wrestlemania. No one beats him, including Rey on Sunday. Cue Orton to call both of them ladies, sending Rey and Angle into an argument over who gets to face Orton tonight. Orton suggests a handicap match and then changes his mind because he isn’t wrestling tonight. He’ll see you in Chicago but here’s Teddy Long to interrupt.

Teddy likes the idea of a handicap match but Orton says Teddy is giving Rey another favor like he did when he put Rey in the main event of Wrestlemania. Angle seems to agree so Rey thinks Angle doesn’t respect him. Orton cuts them off and suggests Rey vs. Angle tonight so Rey can prove himself. They’re both down and Teddy makes the match. As for now, security is going to escort Orton out.

A ranting Orton left during the break.

Chris Benoit vs. Road Warrior Animal

Non-title. Before the match, Animal rants about how he is a legend but doesn’t have a spot at Wrestlemania. Benoit gets shoved around to start but Benoit takes him to the floor without much trouble. Back in and Benoit rolls the German suplexes so Animal tries the brass knuckles. Benoit doesn’t mind and snaps on the Crossface for the easy tap.

Benoit goes to the back where an applauding JBL and Jillian Hall are waiting for him. JBL talks about taking the World Title from another technical wrestler in Eddie Guerrero so he knows he can do it to Benoit as well. Benoit is glad JBL’s hand is healed because he’ll need it to tap out.

This Week In Wrestling History: Wrestlemania II with the battle royal, where William Perry and Big John Studd eliminated each other.

Perry is going into the Hall of Fame this year.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Daniel Cross

JBL has Daniel Cross with him and Cross is having his fifth career match. His fifth career loss comes after less than a minute and a pair of Clotheslines From JBL.

Hall of Fame rundown.

Miz is still coming, but first he needs to invade Titan Towers.

Booker T. vs. Paul Burchill

Sharmell is here too and they both look scared of the Boogeyman. Booker knocks him around to start but Burchill hits a quick crossbody….and it’s Boogeyman time. Sharmell freaks out and tries to leave but they’re scared of Boogeyman’s smoke. There is no Boogeyman so Booker checks underneath the ring, with Boogeyman coming out the other side and kidnapping Sharmell. Booker gets counted out somewhere in there as the angle disguised as a match wraps up.

Post break, Booker can’t find Sharmell. Just follow the screaming.

Bobby Lashley/Tatanka/Matt Hardy vs. MNM/Finlay

Hardy and Mercury start things off and it’s quickly off to Lashley to beat up MNM (again). A Finlay distraction cuts Lashley off but he shrugs them off all over again. Tatanka comes in for a dropkick to Nitro and a legdrop gets two. Finlay comes in and hammers on Tatanka so it’s off to Mercury, who gets punched in the face. Good grief MNM are presented as such helpless losers. Tatanka suplexes both champs down and hands it off to Matt to clean house. Everything breaks down and Lashley gets to clean house, leaving Matt to hit the Twist of Fate to finish Mercury.

Rating: D+. Sweet goodness MNM can’t buy some good luck at this point. Was anyone looking for a rehash of Hardy/Tatanka vs. MNM? Matt getting a win is fine, but was there no one else for him to beat? Nothing to see here, but at least Lashley got to clean some house. Just stop making it the champs’ house.

Here’s Mark Henry in a suit for a funeral for Undertaker. With a choir singing over the speakers, Henry goes over the victims of the Streak, giving us a rather rare Giant Gonzalez reference. The future is in Henry though brothers and sisters, amen. He is the man who took out Batista and he will end the Streak. This didn’t need the funeral theme but lining up the names was a nice idea.

Mexicools vs. Jamie Noble/Kid Kash

Jamie goes nuclear by messing with the lawnmower on the way to the ring, meaning the fight is on in a hurry. Kash takes Psicosis into the corner to start and Noble comes in to run him down with an elbow to the face. Super Crazy gets knocked off the apron so Noble can choke away behind the referee’s back. The camel clutch goes on with Noble pulling at the face before Psicosis dropkicks him out of the air. The hot tag brings in Crazy and house is cleaned with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Kash. Noble hits a neckbreaker and Kash goes up top but Crazy super Spanish Flys him down for the pin.

Rating: C. This was one of those matches you usually only see right before a major pay per view, with the cruiserweights getting to go in there and getting to do their stuff for a few minutes. The good thing is that these people are talented enough to make it work because they can do this kind of stuff in their sleep. Perfectly fine match and a completely acceptable use of TV time.

Booker looks for Sharmell by following a trail of worms.

Post break, Booker follows Sharmell’s screams (and the worms) and finds….Sharmell on a box and screaming a lot because she’s scared of the worms. Boogeyman is far down the hall and laughs a lot. Please get to the end of this already.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Non-title. Angle drives him into the corner to start and then takes him down by the arm. The headlock on the mat keeps Rey in trouble but he gets in a drop toehold into the ropes. Angle gets away from the 619 attempt though and things reset. A headscissors into the corner and another one to the floor have Angle in trouble and we take a break.

Back with Angle sending him hard into the corner to band up the ribs and we hit the waistlock. The bodyscissors goes on but Rey fights up, only to get snapped over in an overhead belly to belly for two. The reverse chinlock with a knee in Rey’s back goes on but Rey fights up again and hits a sitout bulldog. A basement dropkick gets two and a springboard seated senton gets the same. Rey misses a charge into the corner though and it’s a release German suplex to send him flying. There go the straps but the ankle lock is countered into a 619, which is countered into an ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: B. You have to give the fans some kind of an important match on the show and putting two of the best ever out there is a good way to go. They had a fair amount of rest holds and stuff where they could lay around here and that’s not a bad thing. The good side here is the fact that Angle and Mysterio are still very great, even when they’re not at full gear. Nice main event and easily the best thing on the show.

Post match here’s Orton for the RKO to Rey as Angle looks on. Orton says Angle is getting the same thing on Sunday so Angle charges back in. The RKO is countered into an Angle Slam and the ankle lock to make Orton tap to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show is always a weird one as you can only get so much out of a Smackdown where they are trying to get to Wrestlemania safely. The main event is good as you would expect, but the rest is a bunch of quick appearances from people who are going to be at Wrestlemania. It isn’t much to see, but that is hardly a surprise this time around.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 24, 2006: The Better Version

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 24, 2006
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We are less than ten days away from Wrestlemania and Smackdown is in a tough spot. The problem is their side of things is completely set up but we have two more shows before we get to the big show in Chicago. In other words, there is more time for Mark Henry to remind us he isn’t afraid and for Rey Mysterio to talk about Eddie Guerrero. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence, I believe with a new theme song.

Here’s Randy Orton, coming up through Rey Mysterio’s trap door, to open things up. He stands on the platform and says he doesn’t need a fancy entrance or gold medals to be a star around here. Orton talks about the Saturday Night’s Main Event handicap match where he turned on his partners but it’s just that his they would rather fight with him than win a match. They’re just jealous of all of his skills and talents, so feast your eyes on the next World Champion. Short and sweet here.

We look at Finlay cheating to qualify for the Money in the Bank ladder match, plus Road Warrior Animal costing himself his spot.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Battle Royal

Johnny Nitro, Joey Mercury, Bobby Lashley, Simon Dean, Gymini #1, Gymini #2, Paul London, Scotty 2 Hotty, Funaki, Orlando Jordan, Jamie Noble, Nunzio, Sylvan, Super Crazy, Psicosis, Tatanka, Paul Burchill, Kid Kash, Road Warrior Animal

Animal rants a lot on the way to the ring, talking about how unfair this is because he’s more money than anyone here. That earns him a big beatdown and a quick toss over the top for the elimination. Everyone else starts brawling and it’s Scotty being dumped out next. There goes Kid Kash with him and Burchill gets rid of Nunzio. Lashley dumps out the posing Gymini and Dean is thrown out with them as we take a break.

Back with more brawling as Sylvan and Jordan are dumped. Kendrick and Noble save themselves from the apron but MNM dump both of them. There go London and Psicosis and Burchill gets rid of Super Crazy. Tatanka gets rid of Burchill and we’re down to Tatanka, Lashley and MNM. The war path legdrop hits Mercury, who sends Tatanka through the ropes.

The Snapshot hits Lashley but Tatanka comes back in with the double chops to the head. Mercury low bridges him out though and we’re down to three as Cole and Tazz argue over Melina screaming. The double Boston crab has Lashley in trouble but he powers up and suplexes both of them. Lashley’s spear hits post but he’s right back with a spear. Mercury gets gorilla pressed into Nitro though and they’re both out to give Lashley the win.

Rating: C. Other than the bizarre continuing Tatanka push, this was as good as it was going to be. Lashley was about the only possible option to win here and there was no need to pretend it was going to be anyone else. Having Lashley go in as the final option works well enough and we should be in for a good Money in the Bank. They didn’t go too far with this one and that’s all they needed to do.

We look at JBL’s failed cheating in the Saturday Night’s Main Event beer drinking contest, earning himself a beating from Steve Austin.

After saying Kristal Marshall needs to stand there like the woman she is, JBL says the video didn’t show him winning the contest. As for tonight, JBL isn’t cleared to face Chris Benoit, but William Regal is.

We look at Undertaker destroying Daivari at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Mark Henry is ready to take Undertaker’s Streak. Tonight though, Kurt Angle is the next victim.

Finlay vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey isn’t sure what to do to start so Finlay grabs a headlock to take him down. To mix it up a bit, Finlay pulls back on the head (think a Crossface with Mysterio face up) and then slams him down. The chinlock (and a rather aggressive one at that) goes on and a forearm to the face cuts off the comeback bid. A camel clutch goes on for a bit, followed by Finlay sending him outside for a face first drop onto the apron.

Back in and Finlay misses a charge into the corner, allowing Rey to strike away in a hurry. Rey sends him face first into the middle buckle and a split legged moonsault gets two. Finlay bails to the floor to escape a 619 attempt so Rey hits a baseball slide. The slingshot dive lands on the ring skirt though and Finlay hammers away. There’s a whip into the barricade and Finlay posts him back inside to make it worse.

Rey kicks at the leg but gets pulled into a double arm crank. That’s escaped and Finlay’s sunset flip is countered with a kick to the head. Rey hits the springboard seated senton for two but Finlay is back with a Regal Roll for the same. That earns him a kick to the head and Rey loads up the springboard as Finlay goes for the shillelagh. That’s enough of a distraction for Orton to run in for the RKO to give Finlay the pin.

Rating: B. They were rolling by the end of this and it was one of the better back and forth matches I can remember on Smackdown in a good while. You had two talented people with different enough styles that meshed well together. I was getting into and wanted to see how it would go, which wound up being in a surprise direction thanks to some well timed interference.

Raw Rebound.

Here’s Teddy Long for the Boogeyman/Booker T. contract signing. The match was supposed to take place at Saturday Night’s Main Event but claimed a knee injury. The interesting thing though was Booker’s doctors couldn’t find a thing wrong with him. That’s why if Booker doesn’t have the match at Wrestlemania, he’s fired. Booker goes on a rant about how he shouldn’t have to wrestle because he’s that good. Teddy is willing to make it a handicap match with Teddy choosing the partner. Booker signs and Teddy picks Sharmell as the partner.

Miz is currently at Spring Break but he’s coming to Smackdown.

Chris Benoit vs. William Regal

Regal gets a ride to the ring in JBL’s limo. Joined in progress with Benoit’s wristlock being reversed into an armbar until Regal takes him down. With JBL and Jillian Hall watching from the top of the limo, Regal can’t bridge out of a test of strength. They go to the mat with Benoit sending him to the floor. That earns him an exploder from Regal and a kick to the head crushes Benoit’s skull against the post. Back in and we hit the chinlock until Benoit fights up and chops away. Regal goes old school with a crossface chickenwing of all things but Benoit reverses into a dragon suplex. The Crossface makes Regal tap in a hurry.

Rating: B-. This could have been longer but it did its job. Benoit was in a physical fight and might have gotten a little banged up before Wrestlemania but still got the win in the end. These two could have a good match no matter what and they did it here again. If nothing else it was nice to see Regal getting another chance to do something in the ring, which doesn’t happen enough these days.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle

Non-title. Joined in progress again with Henry grabbing the corner to block a German suplex attempt. Angle takes the leg out instead and cranks on the knee but Henry gets up and hits a quick slam. The kickout annoys Henry and the choking is on in the ropes. Henry knocks him outside and a headbutt sends Angle into the barricade. A ram sends Angle into the barricade and we hit the bearhug back inside.

Angle reverses into a German suplex but Henry is back with a running splash, crushing the referee in the corner. The ankle lock goes on but here’s Randy Orton. Rey Mysterio comes in to go after him but takes out Angle with the seated senton by mistake. Henry gets up and the World’s Strongest Slam is good for the pin on Angle.

Rating: C. Much like their Royal Rumble match, there was a little too much insanity going on around here for the match to really work. What we got instead was Orton getting to mess with his other Wrestlemania opponent after doing so earlier in the night. That’s a good idea, but it didn’t come after nearly as good of a match as Finlay vs. Mysterio.

Angle yells at Mysterio to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was much better and the kind of a show that made me want to watch Wrestlemania that much more. Playing up some issues other than Eddie Guerrero has been rather refreshing as Eddie has barely been mentioned in the last few weeks. The rest of the card isn’t exactly looking great, but I’ll take this over what we had last week again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Saturday Night’s Main Event #32 (2020 Redo): The Commercialization Of Wrestlemania

IMG Credit: WWE

Saturday Night’s Main Event #32
Date: March 18, 2006
Location: Cobo Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz

And then there’s this, as we need a two hour commercial for Wrestlemania. The main event is a handicap match between the John Cena/HHH (the Raw main event) and Rey Mysterio/Kurt Angle/Randy Orton (the Smackdown main event), though it could wind up at any part of the show. There’s also Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon in a street fight, which could have some strong potential. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon and Shane McMahon promise to destroy Shawn Michaels tonight.

Shawn Michaels says if he’s going down, Shane is coming with him.

HHH is going to be champion again at Wrestlemania when he beats John Cena. Cue Cena to say HHH is tagging with the champ tonight.

JBL admits that it was a bad idea to challenge Steve Austin to a beer drinking contest but he’ll teach Austin something tonight.

The Boogeyman is coming to get us.

I miss these fifteen second promos. Why don’t we get these things more often today?

Opening sequence.

HHH/John Cena vs. Randy Orton/Kurt Angle/Rey Mysterio

Cena and Orton slug it out to start but Angle tags himself in and suplexes Cena down. There’s another suplex but it’s too early for the Angle Slam. Instead Cena hits a spinebuster as the arena is rather full of smoke from the pyro. HHH comes in so Angle suplexes him for a change. There’s the tag to Rey for a few near falls on HHH until he pokes him in the eye. Cena shoulders Rey down but a headscissors takes HHH over for a change. HHH pulls Cena out of the way of the 619 and blasts Rey with a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with HHH sending Rey hard into the barricade, much to Cena’s annoyance. Cena won’t tag in but Angle does come in to break up a cover off a spinebuster. The sleeper cuts off the EDDIE chants but Rey is out in a hurry. Rey knocks HHH off the top though and hits the moonsault. A dropkick is enough for the hot tag to Orton, who gets beaten up by Cena in a hurry.

The FU hits Orton but HHH Pedigrees Cena and walks out. Actually hold on as HHH comes back and puts Orton on top…and Mysterio breaks up the cover. HHH Pedigrees Mysterio but gets taken out by Angle. There’s an RKO to Angle but Cena counters another RKO into a rollup to finish Orton.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here but it was a good idea to have the pin be a fluke. It also made sense to have such complete insanity for most of the ending, as it fit everything that was going on. None of these people wanted to team together and it wasn’t like this was anything more than a spectacle. They didn’t treat it as anything such either and that was the right idea here.

Cena and HHH pose at each other.

Here’s who is going into the Hall of Fame.

Booker T. has a bad knee and can’t face Boogeyman tonight. Teddy Long cancels the match and Booker limps out of the trainer’s room with Sharmell. They both break into big smiles.

Here are Edge and Lita for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table covered in weapons. Tonight’s guest is Mick Foley, who is so pathetic that all he can do is say a city’s name and put a sock on his hand. That isn’t exactly cutting edge, so Edge wants him out here right now for the Wrestlemania beating.

Cue Foley, with Edge lighting the table on fire. Foley turns it over and beats Edge up before pouring out the thumbtacks. Lita gets in a cheap shot though and Edge knocks Foley onto the tacks. Foley gets up, smiles, and chases Edge up the ramp for a neckbreaker. He even gets extra violent with a Conchairto. Once Edge started talking, this whole thing was only about six minutes long.

Long recap on Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels. They’ve done a very good job of making me want to see Shawn superkick his head off so well done on the build.

Sharmell and Booker have gotten changed and dance in happiness. Cue Boogeyman from the ceiling and they run off screaming through the hall.

It’s time for the beer drinking contest between Steve Austin and JBL, who Texas Two Steps out of the limo. After another opening sequence for the second hour (or second hour and ten minutes or so), JBL talks about how happy NBC is to have him on the show. JBL gets in the insults to Detroit, including the jokes about the carmakers, the labor unions, the mayor, and of course the sports teams. He’ll win the US Title at Wrestlemania and make everything better, but here’s Austin in the truck to cut him off.

Austin says it’s good to be on this show and back in Detroit, but he’s thirsty. He doesn’t understand why JBL challenged him to the contest and thinks JBL is about 6’1 and 205lbs. JBL tries to correct him and talks about drinking a case of beer for breakfast and fifteen pitchers for lunch. That sends JBL into a rant about how Austin tries to buck the system but here are the rules for the contest. Austin: “All right.”

JBL has Canadian beer and they each have 25 beers with a minute to drink each. He insists that they go back to back, with JBL insisting that he isn’t Brokeback Mountain. Austin: “No comment.” JBL mentions the one minute time limit and Austin asks if he’s a one minute man. JBL: “You been talking to my wife?” They start, with JBL pouring his beer out instead of drinking it. Austin calls him out so JBL throws a beer at him and runs. Cue Chris Benoit to throw JBL back in for more beer dousing and the Stunner to complete the extended cameo.

Candice Michelle and Victoria admire Candice’s Playboy cover.

Candice Michelle/Victoria vs. Trish Stratus/Mickie James

JR: “Mickie James is a little psycho.” We get a recap of Mickie’s obsession with Trish and we’re ready to go. Trish and Candice start things off, so of course we get the Go Daddy dance. Candice chokes away both with hands and rope, allowing Victoria to get in a kick to the face. The slingshot flipping legdrop gives Victoria two and we hit the front facelock. The fans are rather pleased with Mickie bouncing on the bottom rope to cheer Trish on and Trish throws Victoria off. Victoria is smart enough to knock Mickie off the ropes, only to walk into Stratusfaction for the fast pin.

Post match Mickie says this is goodbye, but she wants to say it the right way. She tries to kiss Trish but only gets the cheek, allowing Mickie to hit the Chick Kick and scream a lot. Mickie even hits the Stratusfaction, with Lawler saying she doesn’t get even but she gets odd.

During the break, Mickie says she loved Trish and shouts if Trish loves her now.

Wrestlemania rundown, including Booker T. vs. Boogeyman.

Here are Mark Henry and Daivari for a chat. After a video on Henry attacking Undertaker and the casket match being set up as a result and a break, Daivari rants about how Henry isn’t scared of anything, including Undertaker. Henry says Undertaker is afraid of him and he will shove Undertaker into the coffin.

There’s the gong and the druids bring out the casket, followed by Undertaker himself. After the long entrance, the slugout is on with Henry running him over. They head outside with Undertaker whipping him into the steps and then chokeslamming Daivari onto the casket. A Tombstone puts him onto the casket as well as Henry is gone.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

Street fight and Vince is here with Shane. Shawn runs up the ramp to jump Shane and we start in a hurry. A chair goes over Shane’s back and Shawn loads up an early table. Vince gets in a cheap shot from behind to put Shawn down though and Shane throws in a ladder. Shawn goes back first into the post twice in a row and Shane climbs the ladder. Shawn doesn’t stay on the table long though and superplexes Shane from the ladder (in the ring) through the tables (on the floor) for the huge crash to send us to a break.

Back with Shawn knocking Shane down again and loading up the ladder in the corner. Shawn climbs said ladder but Vince gets in a few kendo stick shots to the back to knock him back down. Shane drops the ladder onto Shawn’s back and Vince is rather pleased. It works so well that Shane does it again for two and there’s the running ladder shot to the face for the same. We hit the double arm crank for a breather but Shawn is up with a DDT. Shane is fine enough to chair him in the face but Coast To Coast misses, with Shawn pulling Vince in the way of the trashcan.

There’s the flying forearm into the nipup and the comeback is on. The top rope elbow connects and Sweet Chin Music does the same, only to have Vince pull the referee out. Shawn goes after Vince but Shane gets in a low blow, setting up the Sharpshooter. Vince immediately calls for the bell to give Shane the win. JR: “Michaels has been castrated of his dignity!” JR never was one to let things feel small.

Rating: B-. They beat each other up well, but that big superplex spot was a weird thing to put in the first half of the match. It worked out well enough though and the anger continues to build in Shawn, to the point where he should be ready to annihilate Vince at Wrestlemania. It was a story building match, but it was entertaining at the same time.

Overall Rating: C. This was nothing but a big commercial for Wrestlemania and in that sense it worked out well enough. Nothing on here is overly bad and the show really did seem to fly by. It isn’t a show you need to see, but it also isn’t anything that you would regret watching. The energy was there and for a one off special to set up a big show, it was perfectly fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 17, 2006: It’s All Set

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 17, 2006
Location: CenturyTelCenter, Bossier City, Louisiana
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Saturday Night’s Main Event, which is the last real stop on the Road to Wrestlemania. Things have been a little strange as of late as we have been building towards both shows at once, but Saturday Night is just a commercial for Wrestlemania anyway. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at last week’s main event tag and Undertaker challenging Mark Henry for the Wrestlemania casket match to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lumberjack match. Lashley kicks Finlay outside to start and Finlay gets to beat up the lumberjacks. Back in and Lashley pulls him away from the ropes for a crash to the mat. A clothesline into a backdrop sends Finlay outside again and it’s time for the big staredown between everyone involved. Some cheap shots from the lumberjacks put Lashley down so Finlay throws him outside again to keep up the beating. The chinlock goes on back inside, followed by some forearms to the back.

Those just annoy Lashley, so Finlay sends him outside for more lumberjack fun. Finlay misses a charge into the post though and Lashley pops off a belly to belly. A clothesline gives Lashley two and there’s the one armed delayed vertical suplex. Lashley throws Finlay onto the lumberjacks and then goes outside to beat on him some more. I’m not sure if he understands the idea of a lumberjack match. Back in and Sylvan grabs a chair, but Lashley takes him down. The distraction works though as Finlay gets in the shillelagh shot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as they were beating the heck out of each other but they kept going with the lumberjacks to make things a little off. What we had was a good brawl though and I liked all of the physicality. Sometimes you need to just throw people in there and have them beat each other up, which worked out well enough with two power guys like them.

Wrestlemania Big Time Moment: the Gimmick Battle Royal. Works for me.

MNM is gawking over Vince McMahon’s Muscle and Fitness cover and admiring his glutes. Melina comes up to take it away, revealing that they are looking at Candice Michelle’s Playboy. She keeps it for her own personal use. Nitro: “What are you going to do with it?” Melina: “Use your imagination.” Melina walks over to Kristal Marshall and says that she’s beautiful in the Divas Magazine, but Kristal needs to learn her place around here. Paul Burchill comes up so Melina call MNM over. Burchill whips out the sword and the villains run off.

William Regal/Jillian Hall vs. Kristal Marshall/Paul Burchill

Regal keeps stealing glances at Jillian in her gear. The women fight over a lockup to start with Jillian sending her into the corner. That allows commentary to discuss their gear, as commentary tends to do around here. Regal tries to break things up and gets slapped in the face so Burchill comes in for a running crossbody. A shove out of the corner puts Burchill down though and Regal kicks him in the head (simple things can work just fine). We hit the chinlock but Burchill fights up and it’s back to the women for the catfighting. Since that can’t last long, Burchill comes back in for the C4 to finish Regal in a hurry.

Rating: D+. It really is amazing to see the differences between people with Wrestlemania stories and people who are destined for the pre-show battle royal. They’re fighting over a magazine and Burchill’s choice to be a pirate, which doesn’t exactly make me think much of them going into the biggest show of the year. Then again I’m a sucker for most pirate shenanigans so this was entertaining in a few ways.

Sharmell and Booker are in the back with Sharmell screaming about how scared she is of the Boogeyman. Booker has a box for her though and knows everything will be ok.

Verne Gagne Hall of Fame video.

Booker T. vs. Jeremy Young

Sharmell is in a beekeeper’s suit. Booker runs Young over as Sharmell continues to panic on the floor. Some more shots to the face let Booker stomp him down in the corner and there’s a spinebuster to cut off the comeback. The ax kick finishes Young.

Rating: D. Yeah I don’t think there’s any secret to what they were going for here. I’m hoping they wrap up the Boogeyman stuff sooner rather than later as it is the kind of story that was fun once or twice (and that’s a stretch) and now it’s just silly. Well sillier that is. Let him be a special attraction if he has to be on the show, but having him with big names like this is a little too much.

Post match Boogeyman’s music plays so Booker and Sharmell hide underneath the ring. Guess who they find under there.

We look at last week’s main event again.

We get a sitdown interview with Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle. Orton cuts Cole off to ask Angle how healthy he is after last week’s attacks. Angle thinks it’s funny and loads up the broken freaking neck line but Orton cuts him off as well because we’ve heard it before. As for Mysterio, Orton is going to embarrass him at Wrestlemania because he doesn’t belong in the main event. Angle calls out Orton for not respecting Mysterio, who beat Orton to win the Royal Rumble.

Orton says Angle is a paper champion who won the title in a battle royal that Orton wasn’t even in. That sends Angle into a rant about Orton being a one time champion who held it for a month. Mysterio says he’ll win the title at Wrestlemania because dreams come true. Rey says he will have Angle’s back tonight and tomorrow, but that won’t be the case at Wrestlemania. Angle doesn’t want it any other way and Orton promises to dominate in all three matches. This didn’t add much but it worked well enough and reinforced what was already set up.

The Miz is coming.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Road Warrior Animal vs. Matt Hardy

Matt slugs away to start and gets shoved down. That’s fine with Matt as he takes Animal down and hammers away again. Animal goes after Matt’s banged up knee, which only draws up some louder HARDY chants. The leg cranking is on but Matt uses the good leg to kick him away. A reverse DDT into the Side Effect gets two and there’s another Side Effect to send Animal into the corner. Matt unloads in the corner but almost hits the referee, allowing Animal to get in a brass knuckles shot for the pin.

Rating: D. I’m not exactly expecting this to stand as even 2006 Smackdown isn’t insane enough to put Animal in a big match at Summerslam. The match was nothing of course because it’s Animal, but what else were you expecting? Was there really a rub to get from beating an old member of half of the Legion of Doom?

Post match the referee sees the knuckles and reverses the decision to send Matt to Wrestlemania. Dang Matt really can’t catch a break. Yeah he’s going to Wrestlemania, but he has to keep heat on Animal?

Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and JBL is on commentary with a cooler of beer to hype up the beer drinking contest with Steve Austin. Benoit goes straight to the suplex to set up the corner chops. Jordan is sent outside for more chops, allowing Benoit to glare at JBL. Back in and Jordan takes him down by the arm as JBL goes into one of his rather intense rants about Austin meaning nothing in Texas. Benoit fights out of an armbar and snaps off the German suplexes. JBL: “I GOT FIRED IN GERMANY ONE TIME AND I REALLY DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT!” The Sharpshooter finishes Jordan.

Rating: D+. These two had to set some kind of a record for facing each other in matches that weren’t all that good. It isn’t like Jordan is making anyone look good as he’s someone out there to get beaten up with no doubt about who is winning. Can we see what Benoit can do against a stuff giraffe named Irving instead?

Post match JBL hits Benoit with the cooler (good shot too).

We look back at Mark Henry costing Kurt Angle the World Title two weeks ago.

Mark Henry isn’t scared of the casket or the Streak. Tomorrow, Undertaker can come face him on Saturday Night’s Main Event.

MNM/Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle/Randy Orton/Rey Mysterio

Melina and Daivari are here with the villains and Angle has bad ribs from last week. Orton slaps Nitro before the bell and it’s Angle top wristlocking Nitro to start. Mercury comes in and gets a knee to Angle’s ribs to take over in the corner. Angle’s ribs are fine enough to snap off a belly to belly and it’s off to Rey. The springboard moonsault gets two on Mercury and a spinning bulldog to Nitro gets the same.

Mysterio gets sent into the corner though and Henry comes in to step on Rey’s chest. The splash misses though and Rey hammers away in the corner, only to have Orton distract the referee so Daivari can get in a cheap shot. That of course means an EDDIE chant, because that’s all Rey means these days. We take a break and come back with Melina slapping Mysterio.

A headscissors choke on the apron (with the camera cutting to the other side of the ring because the skirt is a little short) keeps Rey down and Nitro drops an elbow on Rey’s back. Henry comes back in for the gorilla press drop but another splash misses. An enziguri allows the diving tag to Angle, as Orton stops to fix his boot. Angle starts cleaning house as everything breaks down, including the Angle Slam to Henry. There’s the 619 to Nitro but Orton tags himself in and throws Mysterio outside to steal the pin on Nitro.

Rating: C. And yes, the Tag Team Champions lose again. It was to a bigger name, but can we go a few weeks without them losing? Just for a change of pace? Anyway, this was another way of enforcing things that we already know, because there isn’t much else that can be done to set up the triple threat. That’s not good with two weeks to go before Wrestlemania, but it isn’t the deepest story in the world.

Overall Rating: C-. This was another show that bounced back and forth between building to Saturday Night’s Main Event and Wrestlemania but it didn’t work as well as Raw. The triple threat match is as set as it is going to be, though it was nice to have the three of them not bring up Eddie every few seconds. The wrestling wasn’t great, but that is rarely the point this time of year. Not a bad show, but the build for Wrestlemania is just tightening up everything that is already set, plus some MITB qualifying. That could make for some fairly week shows on the way to Chicago, but this could have been worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2011 (2016 Redo): Because Of A Text

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This is a pretty big show with the blowoffs to two amazing feuds. The headlining act match is CM Punk vs. John Cena in a champion vs. champion match and the rematch to their masterpiece a month earlier. The match I was more excited about though was Christian vs. Randy Orton in one of the most underrated feuds in recent years. Let’s get to it.

The guitarist from Tool plays the national anthem.

The opening video talks about a domino effect, triggered by CM Punk winning the Raw World Title back in Chicago at Money in the Bank. As a result, Vince McMahon was stripped of power (for all of a few months) and John Cena became the other Raw World Champion. Tonight it’s champion vs. champion and nothing else is worth talking about.

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Mysterio had beaten Miz to win the vacant Raw World Champion so Miz attacked him on Raw to help set this up. This is in during the full on Cole Love Miz period and the annoyance begins early. Before the match Miz complains about not being on the show but here’s R-Truth to complain about various letters. He doesn’t like spiders and Summerslam or Cee Lo Green performing so S and C are on his bad list. Cue Alberto (Mr. Raw Money in the Bank) to cut him off and we’re finally ready to go.

Morrison and Del Rio are both WAY over here but it’s Kofi vs. Miz to get things going. A double flapjack with Morrison helping out plants Miz and we get stereo nipups. Morrison gets all fired up to hammer on Truth because their partnership from a few years ago just means nothing to him. Everything breaks down for a bit with Morrison being knocked off the top rope to change control.

Miz grabs the chinlock but gets kicked in the head to knock him silly. It’s back to Kofi as things speed up and the SOS counters the Skull Crushing Finale for two. Everything breaks down for a bit and Miz hits a Diamond Cutter into a 1%er for two. I’m still not wild on that move but Kofi’s selling made it look better. The heels start taking turns on Kofi with Del Rio starting in on the arm and mocking Kofi’s clapping taunt.

Miz gets two off a clothesline as Cole sings his praises, even listing off Miz’s high school accolades. A double stomp allows the hot tag to Rey, who comes in to a roar. Mysterio starts cleaning house but Del Rio breaks up a double 619. Morrison dives onto Alberto and Truth takes the 619, followed by a top rope splash for the pin at 9:36.

Rating: B-. Take six guys and give them ten minutes to have a fun opener. I like a good six man tag and it can accomplish multiple goals in a short span. For some reason though WWE feels that the only kinds of matches you can have are singles, regular tags and triple threats so we don’t get enough of something like this. If nothing else it gave the fans a lot to cheer about in a short time, meaning they’re ready to go early on. Well done indeed.

Executive Vice President of Talent Relations Johnny Ace (you get tired just listing his job title) wants CM Punk to publicly apologize for embarrassing him on Monday. Punk says he’s sorry and offers a big grin but he turns around to see Stephanie. The champ insults the men in her life but she doesn’t seem phased. Stephanie: “But what would I know? I’m just Vince McMahon’s clueless daughter.” Punk: “Yeah pretty much.” Stephanie offers a handshake for luck but Punk says no because he knows where that hand has been. WHY CAN NO ONE BURN STEPHANIE LIKE THIS TODAY???

We recap Mark Henry vs. Sheamus. This was during Henry’s rampage over everyone in his path and his Hall of Pain period. No one was left for him to beat so Sheamus, a heel at the time, came out and simply said “I’ll fight him.” I still really like that line as it sums up everything and gives you a reason to like Sheamus in two seconds. Simple, yet effective.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Henry shoves him around to start but Sheamus comes back with knees to the ribs and forearms to the back. The Irish Curse attempt is easily shrugged away though and Sheamus is tossed outside. Back in and Henry does the running crotch attack to the back of Sheamus’ head, followed by a backbreaker for your run of the mill heel offense.

An over the shoulder backbreaker keeps Sheamus in trouble but Henry misses a Vader Bomb. That means it’s time for forearms to the chest but a double shoulder puts both guys down. Sheamus is up first and the Brogue Kick knocks Henry to the floor. Ever the not that bright good guy though, Sheamus goes out after him and gets driven though the barricade for the countout at 9:22.

Rating: C+. I like that finish a lot as they made Sheamus look like a real threat with the Brogue Kick and then didn’t have him get pinned. The important thing here though was Henry looking unstoppable as he was on the way to the World Title soon after this. Smart booking here and everyone comes out looking like they should.

Christian has an insurance policy for his match against Randy Orton. It’s going to be a summer blockbuster and he’ll be like Harry Potter. Orton on the other hand will be like Cowboys and Aliens: an overrated, overproduced and overhyped flop. Hey now that movie was underrated.

Cee Lo Green does his mini concert for reasons I don’t understand. Bright Lights, Bigger City is catchy though. Some Divas come out to dance during Forget You.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is defending in your standard Barbie vs. monster feud and has Eve Torres in her corner. Beth on the other hand has Natalya. Kelly goes straight after her to start and fires off some forearms in the corner to send Beth outside, followed by a middle rope cross body to the floor. Back in and Beth knocks her out of the corner to take over before we hit a quick chinlock. An over the shoulder backrbeaker (good move for Beth) has Kelly in trouble and Beth ties her in the Tree of Woe to make it even worse. Kelly gets knocked around in the corner but counters the Glam Slam into a victory roll to retain at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Total squash for the most part here with a fluke ending, albeit the same fluke ending to almost every Kelly vs. Beth match ever. Kelly certainly got her push because of her looks but she was getting much better in the ring near the end of her career with matches like this one being far more watchable than some of the disasters that the division hard around this time.

Stephanie leaves John Cena’s locker room. For some reason we have to see the Cena logo twice for the announcers to catch on.

R-Truth is annoyed about getting ripped off so Jimmy Hart of all people offers his managerial services. Truth agrees but realizes that Jimmy is named….uh, Jimmy, and freaks out. Ron Artest and his daughter are shown watching for a worthless cameo.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

Fallout from Money in the Bank where Bryan won by knocking Barrett off the ladder. Bryan doesn’t have his Flight of the Valkyries (yes Flight, which was the name of his WWE theme instead of Ride) theme song yet and it’s really weird to have it missing. Daniel starts in with the kicks and works on the arm as Booker talks about Daniel’s diet.

Bryan fights out of a wristlock and dropkicks Barrett down before bending Barrett’s shoulders around in a variety of painful looking ways. The running dropkick in the corner and a running kick to the chest, only to walk into the yet to be named (or at least not named here) Winds of Change. Barrett fires off his knees in the ropes and kicks Bryan out to the floor.

Back in and we hit the chinlock before Daniel escapes the Wasteland, setting up a running knee off the apron. Barrett’s pumphandle slam doesn’t work and it’s time for the yet to be named YES Kicks. Again, those chants really add a lot. The guillotine goes on and Barrett gets taken down into the LeBell Lock, only to reach over to the rope for the break. Bryan gets crotched on top though and Barrett hits a quick Wasteland for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B. I still really like this match as it’s two guys beating on each other for the better part of twelve minutes until one of them can’t get up again. Barrett was the bigger star at this point as Bryan really was just a guy in trunks at this point, albeit one with a huge upside. Sometimes you just need a good wrestling match without a lot of meaning behind it and that’s what you got here.

The California National Guard is here.

We recap Christian vs. Randy Orton in a feud that has been going on for months. Christian lost the title less than a week after winning it and then wanted one more match. Orton eventually lost the title via DQ at Money in the Bank, setting up the rematch here with No Holds Barred. This is one of the best feuds in a long time and would have won Feud of the Year had it not been for Cena vs. Punk. It was perfectly put together and one great match after another. The two of them had chemistry together and that’s the most important thing you can do.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Christian is defending and this is no holds barred but first the champ has a big surprise for everyone as he brings out Edge. After an insane ovation, Edge thanks the fans but reminds them that he can never compete again due to his neck injuries. He was kind of glad that he left when he did though because it opened the door for Christian to become champion.

Christian lost the title five days after winning it and then complained about it for week after week. He just whined until he got his way and then won the title via disqualification. Edge might have done some dastardly things in his time but he did it with some style. Somewhere along the way, Christian became a disgrace to himself. Edge isn’t going to help him tonight and leaves Christian all alone.

Orton starts hammering away in the corner and backdrops Christian to set up the circle stomp and a knee drop for two. They head outside but Christian is smart enough to run away from an RKO through the announcers’ table. Christian grabs the title and runs into the crowd but Orton easily catches him (hint: it’s the guy in wrestling gear carrying a big gold belt) and sends it back inside.

The champ sends him shoulder first into the post (completely legal remember, even though you’ll almost never hear it called a DQ in the first place) to take over. It’s kendo stick time as we hit the standard street fight tropes. Christian misses a shot though and has to settle with an elbow to Orton’s jaw. There’s an interesting story here with Christian not being able to pull off the cheating but doing just fine with the wrestling. Orton grabs a rollup for two but gets caught in a spinebuster for the same.

It’s kendo stick time again but Christian dives into a dropkick to the ribs to keep up the subtle story. Orton can’t get in a stick shot either as the no holds barred rule hasn’t played a big role yet. The elevated DDT is countered into a Killswitch attempt which is countered into Orton’s backbreaker. He can’t hit the Punt but Christian can’t crotch him against the post as Orton uses his legs to pull Christian face first into the post instead.

Now it’s time for the real weapons as Orton pulls out some tables but Christian gets in a shot from behind and sets one up on the floor. Back in and Christian goes up top, only to get superplexed down onto an unset table for a unique spot. It also gets a near fall but that’s not as important. That table is set up in the corner but Christian has to counter the RKO by sending him to the floor. Orton sends him knees first into the steps, only to have Christian send him head first into the steps.

Next up it’s a monitor off Orton’s head to knock him onto the announcers’ table. Like any cocky heel would do though, Christian tries an RKO but gets caught in the real thing through the table for a double KO spot. Back in and Christian gets two off a Killswitch and you can hear the fans going nuts on the near fall. Well deserved too. With the table still looming in the table and another one at ringside, Christian opts for two chairs.

That’s enough for Orton as he takes one away and cracks Christian over the back, followed by a second one to send the champ off the apron and through the first table. Orton brings in the steps and some trashcans but Christian avoids a stomp onto the steps. He can’t avoid a powerslam through the table or a DDT onto the trashcan as this is getting brutal. Christian blocks the RKO with a kendo stick shot, only to have Orton hit another one a few seconds later to win the title back at 23:43.

Rating: A. I love this feud and the matches get better and better every time. There was a great story here of Christian being able to compete in the wrestling but being in WAY over his head against Orton, who has that evil streak in him. This started off as more of a wrestling match with Christian poking his toe into the violence but then embracing it full on, only to be destroyed by the more violent Orton. It’s a great story with a great match to go with it and that’s as good as it gets.

Video on WWE taking over Los Angeles for the week, including an Axxess.

We recap John Cena vs. CM Punk in a narrated video. Punk won the Raw World Title from Cena last month in a masterpiece, only to leave the company with the title immediately after. Cena won the title a few weeks later but Punk came out that night (good thing he just happened to be there), setting up a champion vs. champion match to see who really is the best man. Ignore the fact that they already established that fact at Money in the Bank when Punk beat him in the first place. Due to Punk leaving under Vince’s watch, the Board of Directors replaced Vince as boss with HHH, who Punk hates in general.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and HHH is guest referee. As expected, Punk is now a mega face and gets a big old pop, much to HHH’s annoyance. Cena on the other hand is booed out of the building as you kind of have to expect as well. Feeling out process to start with Punk grabbing a headlock for that horribly blatant spot calling. Punk was on a roll at this point but he was as bad as Shawn Michaels at hiding that stuff.

The dueling chants start up and sound even louder than usual, as they should at a major show. Now it’s Cena working a headlock into an armbar before Punk hits a leg lariat for two. Cena takes him down into a chinlock as this is firmly in first gear over five minutes in. The fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. True but at least he still is a wrestler and not someone who has been waiting two years for a UFC fight.

Punk finally escapes and puts Cena down for a breather, earning a loud CM PUNK chant. Off to a body vice as this match seems to be collapsing under the weight of the expectations from the previous match. Back up and Punk snaps his throat across the top rope to block a superplex attempt, followed by dropkicking Cena out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Punk grabs a seated abdominal stretch, only to have Cena power up into a spinning slam for a breather. Fans: “FRUITY PEBBLES!”

The finishing sequence is countered by Punk’s headlock takeover but he gets caught in the ProtoBomb. Punk comes right back with an enziguri and a Koji Clutch (I love that move) which is countered into an STF which is countered into the Anaconda Vice (Not a key lock Booker. Learn your details.). That actually gets some near falls until Cena reverses into a crossface to continue this pretty awesome sequence. Punk gets to the ropes and sends Cena outside for a suicide dive to put both guys down again.

HHH, who has been a total non-factor for the first fifteen minutes, gets to nine but can’t bring himself to finish the countout. Instead he throws both of them back inside and it’s time for the big strike off. Cena takes over with a dropkick and the Shuffle but the AA is countered into a sunset flip and kick to the head for two each. Cena’s sitout powerslam gets the same, as does Punk’s middle rope bulldog.

A very weary Punk’s springboard clothesline is countered into the STF but they haven’t traded enough finishers yet. Speaking of finishers, Cena gets two off the AA. The GTS gets the same result with Punk staring up at HHH in shock. Punk comes up holding his knee though but drops the top rope elbow for two anyway. Cena pounds Punk down but eats a running knee to the face, setting up the GTS for the pin at 24:08, despite Cena’s foot clearly being on the rope.

Rating: B+. This match would be remembered so much more fondly if it wasn’t for the fact that they had such a masterpiece just a month earlier. They had to try and follow that up and it just couldn’t be done. The screwy ending didn’t help things, just like having HHH out there for the sake of waiting on a screwy finish that doesn’t seem to mean much since this is a night when instant replay doesn’t exist.

HHH applauds Punk post match and raises his hand before leaving. Punk poses….but here’s Kevin Nash through the crowd to lay Punk out. That means Alberto time and here we go.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Punk is defending and loses the title to an enziguri in eleven seconds.

A quick celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. This show is nothing short of excellent with only the Divas Title match being short of good (and seeing Kelly Kelly in shorts is never a bad thing). Orton vs. Christian is great stuff with a great story, the main event is awesome, Barrett vs. Bryan is a hidden gem, the crowd is white hot all night and the rest is all worth watching…..until you get to the ending.

That’s where the show falls apart as not only did the ending only make limited sense here but it would turn into one of the biggest messes anyone had seen in a few short weeks. Somehow Punk wouldn’t get his rematch next month because he was busy jobbing to HHH in the main event of Night of Champions.

Oh and Nash? Yeah he sent himself a text message telling him to come out there right then because he wanted one more crowd reaction. That’s how they followed up on the potentially hottest angle in years: Kevin Nash sent himself a text message and HHH pinned CM Punk, setting up HHH vs. Nash, who never fought Punk in this whole thing. Such is life in WWE, or out of WWE actually and you can’t blame Punk after all that.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2016 Redo: B-

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2016 Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2016 Redo: A

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B+

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2016 Redo: A

I think we can call this my definitive thoughts on the show as the ratings were almost identical in the last two reviews. Definitely check this one out.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2011-a-screwy-ending-isnt-a-bad-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2011 (2013 Redo): I Still Love It

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This year has been all about the rise of CM Punk. In June he sat on the stage and ripped into John Cena and the WWE in general, leading up to the world title match at Money in the Bank in Chicago. Punk won the title in a masterpiece and then left the company as champion. Cena won the title from Rey Mysterio on Raw, but Punk came back with his title. Tonight it’s champion vs. champion for the undisputed title. Oh and Christian vs. Orton in the blowoff to the underrated feud of the year. Let’s get to it.

Adam Jones, some guitarist from Tool, plays the Star Spangled Banner. WE WANT MAN MOUNTAIN ROCK!

The opening video is about how Summerslam being where dreams are made. We shift to a shot of dominoes falling over. Punk talks about being the first domino being knocked over and starting a revolution. HHH is guest referee tonight because what would a major match be without him?

The theme song this year is Bright Lights Bigger City by Cee Lo Green. I usually don’t care for him but it fits the show well.

The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/R-Truth vs. Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio

Cole IMMEDIATELY freaks out over Miz being on Summerslam. Miz keeps talking about how awesome he is until Truth cuts him off. This was when Truth was insane so he complains about things that start with the letter S, like spiders, Summerslam, Cee Loo Green and Conspiracy. Del Rio is the Raw MITB winner. The fans are WAY into Del Rio here for some reason. Mysterio gets a title shot at Punk or Cena tomorrow on Raw. Miz and Kofi get things going and the fans are actually behind Miz as well. Kofi hits a nice monkey flip followed by a dropkick before bringing in Morrison.

A double clothesline puts Miz down and the good guys do stereo nipups in a nice visual. Off to Truth who is tackled by Morrison but comes back with right hands to the face. Truth sends Morrison to the floor as the announcers talk about wigs. Thankfully Booker is there to get us back to the action by shouting BACK TO THE ACTION! Miz comes in with a kick to the head and puts on a chinlock, only to have Morrison kick him in the head to escape.

Kofi comes flying in off the hot tag and cleans house with his barrage of high flying offense including a cross body to Miz for two. The Boom Drop gets two and everything breaks down. Kofi gets two off the SOS but Del Rio breaks up the pin. Miz hits a kind of Diamond Cutter face plant for two and it’s Kofi in trouble from the boots of R-Truth. Del Rio comes in with a belly to back suplex and mocks Kofi’s Trouble in Paradise hand slap.

Kofi kicks him away but Miz breaks up a hot tag bid. Cole lists off Miz’s high school accomplishments as Kofi flips out of a sunset flip and stomps on Miz’s ribs to put him down. Hot tag brings in Rey to face Truth who does his usual backflip/splits sequence, only to have Rey kick him in the head. Del Rio breaks up a double 619 so only Truth takes the kick. Kofi dives on Miz and Rey hits a top rope splash on Truth for the pin.

Rating: B-. Take six guys, give them ten minutes and let them have fun. It’s an idea as old as time and it’s still used to this day because it still works. The good guys can fire up any crowd with their high spots and the fans were into the match as a result. As mentioned earlier, Summerslam is great at having good openers and this was no exception.

Johnny Ace wants an apology from Punk over a kick to the head on Monday. Punk gives an over the top apology and Ace walks away. Punk turns around to see Stephanie who wishes him good luck. He makes fun of Vince and she wishes both Cena and Punk good luck. “But I’m just Vince’s clueless daughter right?” Punk: “Yeah pretty much.” She offers him a handshake but he knows where it’s been.

We recap Sheamus vs. Mark Henry. Henry is just starting the Hall of Pain run and has been destroying everyone in sight and breaking a lot of limbs. He stood tall in the ring until Sheamus came out and said three simple words: I’ll fight him. It turned Sheamus face and made him very popular due to the simple idea of standing up to a bully. THIS is how you book Sheamus: have him in there against some monster and taking a good fight to him, not slumming it with Damien Sandow and winning each match with ease.

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Henry takes him down with a clothesline to start but Sheamus comes right back with right hands. The pale one pounds away and actually knocks Henry down to his knees, only to be thrown to the floor. Henry EASILY throws Sheamus through the ropes and hits a splash for two. A running crotch attack crushes Sheamus’ neck but he’s in the ropes before the count starts.

A backbreaker puts Sheamus down and it’s off to an Argentinean backbreaker to complete the set. Sheamus powers out, only to be sent chest first into the corner. Henry misses a Vader Bomb though and Sheamus has a breather. A series of ax handles to the chest and head put Henry down followed by the forearms in the ropes. They clothesline each other down and we get a breather.

Back up and Mark runs into a boot in the corner, allowing Sheamus to go up for the top rope shoulder, good for two. The Brogue Kick misses though and a clothesline puts Sheamus down. Sheamus slips out of the World’s Strongest Slam and there’s the Brogue Kick to knock Henry to the outside. Sheamus follows him to the floor but Henry drives him into the post and through the barricade in a great crash, allowing Mark to beat the count for a countout win.

Rating: C+. This was another simple formula: take two big power brawlers and let them beat the tar out of each other for nearly the minutes. It’s also a smart ending as Sheamus gets to stay strong but Henry gets another win. Sheamus would get a countout win I believe at the next PPV so it evened out. Good, fun brawl here.

World Heavyweight Champion Christian says his match with Orton will be an epic summer blockbuster. He’ll be like Harry Potter, making magic at every turn. Orton will be like Cowboys and Aliens: a flashy flop. That movie was good though.

Trailer for Killer Elite which is probably sponsoring the show or something.

Here’s Cee Lo Green for the mini concert. He looks like he’s in big sparkly pajamas but the song isn’t bad so I’m not complaining much. The fans aren’t moving at all for this but the vocals are pretty bad so I can barely hear a word he’s saying. Now he throws in his bigger hit Forget You, complete with Divas in red dancing behind him.

Now here’s a Slim Jim ad. I’m sure the fans are LOVING this stuff.

Now a 7-11 commercial. My goodness get to something else.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

I could go for a Slurpee. Back to 7-11 it is! Kelly is defending. Beth and Natalya are the Divas of Doom here and don’t like the Barbies like Eve and Kelly. Kelly and those AWESOME little shorts of hers go after Beth and we get the screaming headscissors. Beth is knocked off the apron and Kelly dives off the middle rope to knock her to the floor. Back in and Kelly flips out of the corner and Beth clotheslines her down.

Kelly gets dropped throat first on the top rope for two Eve plays cheerleader. This is a lot of standing around with Beth glaring down at Kelly before hitting a running Umaga shot in the corner. We hit the chinlock followed by the second over the shoulder backbreaker of the night. Kelly finally slips out and hits a quick neckbreaker to put both of them down.

Beth sends her into the Tree of Woe for no follow up before getting two off a side slam. Kelly gets in a knee to the face and goes nuts on Beth, only to have the handspring elbow countered. The Glam Slam is countered into a victory roll for the pin, just like every time Kelly beat Phoenix.

Rating: D+. All things considered, this was something resembling a miracle. The match was nothing of note but Kelly actually didn’t embarrass herself out there. She got WAY better over the years, but at the end of the day she was out there because of how good she looked in those tiny shorts. It also says a lot that less than two years later only Natalya is left from this match.

Stephanie leaves Cena’s locker room for some reason.

Truth and….Jimmy Hart of all people talk about a c-o-n-spiarcy. Jimmy offers to manage him and Truth seems interested before he realizes that Hart is…..LITTLE JIMMY! Truth looks over to see Ron Artest (Metta World Peace) and his daughter in a worthless cameo.

BUY TWIX!

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

I like Barret’s End of Days theme a lot better than the God Save the Queen one now. This is MITB fallout as Bryan knocked Barrett off to win the case. Bryan has some slow music which isn’t all that bad, but soon he would go to Flight of the Valkyries which works far better for him. Bryan is rocking the white trunks with red trim here which are pretty awesome. Feeling out process to start with Barrett punching Bryan down to stop the wrestling part of the match.

Daniel takes it to the mat and spins out of a wristlock before dropkicking Wade down. Cole says Barrett is a submission master as Bryan does the AJ Styles drop down into a dropkick, right down to the same overblown drop down. Back up and Bryan hooks a dragon screw leg whip and a running dropkick in the corner for two. Another kick to the chest gets two and Bryan backflips over Barrett, only to charge into the Winds of Change for two. A slingshot belly to back backbreaker gets two for Wade and we hit a reverse chinlock.

Back up and Bryan hits a running clothesline but Wade comes back with a big running forearm to the face. Wade puts Bryan in the ropes and kicks him out to the floor before hooking a chinlock. The hold doesn’t last long again but Bryan ducks a boot and crotches Barrett on the top. A dropkick puts him on the floor and there’s the flying knee off the apron. Back in again and the missile dropkick gets a close two for the American.

Bryan escapes a pumphandle slam and fires off more kicks to the chest for two. Wade ducks a clothesline and hits a big boot to the face for two but Wasteland is countered into the guillotine choke. Barrett goes down and there’s the LeBell Lock but Wade gets into the ropes for the break. Daniel loads up a superplex but Barrett crotches him on the top rope. A middle rope clothesline takes Bryan off the ropes and Wasteland is good for the 100% clean pin.

Rating: B+. I REALLY liked this for one reason: it was a good wrestling match. It’s a basic story of one guy wanting revenge for a loss in a big match, it had a good story in the ring with a striker against a technical guy and the action was good. Wade Barrett is a guy who can go in the ring but he’s the ultimate jobber to the stars and I have no idea why when he can do this.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Christian. Christian won the title at Extreme Rules but Orton came over to Smackdown to replace Edge as the top guy. Orton won the title on his first night on the show, ending Christian’s title reign in less than a week. Christian wanted one more match, turning heel in the process.

Orton beat him again, but Christian some how got one more match and if Orton got disqualified, he would lose the title. For once, that actually worked and Christian won the title. Tonight, it’s the final match with no holds barred. These matches kept getting better and better and if Punk vs. Cena hadn’t happened it would have run away with feud of the year.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Before the match, Christian brings out Edge to be in his corner to a HUGE ovation. After a full entrance, Edge says that he’ll never be cleared to wrestle again. When he first left, that made him happy because he was able to pass the torch to Christian. Edge didn’t think it was fair that Christian had to defend the title five days after a ladder match and Christian complained too.

Then he complained more and more and more and more. Then he wanted rematch after rematch and FINALLY he won the title back…..but he did it by disqualification. Yeah Edge did some bad things, but he did it with style. He didn’t hide behind lawyers and clipboards. Somewhere along the line Christian became a parody of himself. Edge didn’t know Christian would ever be like this, and that’s not good. Edge drops the mic, walks out, Christian freaks, and here’s Randy.

Remember this is no holds barred. Orton takes him into the corner and stomps him down before hitting a quick clothesline. Christian rakes the eyes and gets a quick one count off a middle rope elbow to the face. A backdrop puts Christian down and Randy stomps away but the champion chokes away on the ropes. Orton loads up the Elevated DDT but gets backdropped to the floor. Really back and forth so far.

Orton sends him head first into the barricade and loads up the announce table. The RKO is blocked and Christian grabs the belt before sprinting into the crowd. Randy catches up with him and stomps Christian down onto the concrete before heading back to ringside. Back in and Orton rains down right hands in the corner. Christian avoids a charge and sends Orton’s famously bad shoulder into the post to take over. The champion brings in a kendo stick to choke away before getting two off a back elbow.

Christian busts out a spinebuster for two and goes to the middle rope, only to be dropkicked out of the air. The powerslam puts Christian down again and now Randy gets the kendo stick. Instead of swinging though he catches Christian’s dropkick into a jackknife cover for two followed by the Thesz Press. Christian escapes the Elevated DDT into a Killswitch attempt but Orton counters into the backbreaker for two. The idea of this feud was that they knew each other so well and they would add another move to the string of counters every match. It was awesome.

Orton can’t hit the Punt but has to send Christian face first into the post to avoid getting crotched against the steel. Randy pulls out a pair of tables and slides one into the ring, only to have Christian drive him into the apron. Christian sets up the other table on the floor and they head inside where Orton superplexes him onto (not through as the table hasn’t been set up yet) the table for two. The table is set up in the corner but Christian counters the whip into the reverse DDT for no cover. Instead he loads up the spear but Orton jumps over and tries the RKO, only to be sent over the top and out to the floor.

Christian goes after him but is sent knees first into the steps to put him down again. Orton takes forever to set up the steps but gets sent face first into the steel again. Christian loads up the other announce table and blasts Orton in the head with the announce table. The champion tries an RKO through the table but gets caught in the real thing to destroy the table instead. Back in and Christian hits a quick Killswitch for two and Christian is furious.

The champion brings in a pair of chairs for the Conchairto but spits on Orton, causing Randy to move away. Now it’s Randy with the chair, cracking it over Christian’s back and knocking him off the apron through the table. Orton throws in some steps and trashcans before catching a charging Christian in a powerslam through the table in the corner.

Some HARD kendo stick shots to the back have Christian in even more trouble and the Elevated DDT crushes a trashcan. Christian tries one more rush but his sunset flip out of the corner is countered into the RKO (same move that gave Orton the title in the first place) onto the steps for the pin and the title.

Rating: A-. Much like the Undertaker vs. Edge Cell match a few years earlier, this was the perfect way to blow off a feud with Orton being the definitive winner. This feud did a great job of building upon itself with the extended sequences carrying over from match to match and building a deep psychology. Great match here and the whole feud is worth checking out.

Video on Axxess.

We recap Punk vs. Cena. As mentioned, Punk left with the title at Money in the Bank so there was a tournament held to crown a new champion. Mysterio won but lost the title to Cena the same night. Punk came out and held up his own belt, meaning we had two champions. This all happened in two weeks when it could have went on for months. The entire match is summed up with one idea: Cena doesn’t know if he can beat Punk. HHH is the new boss and is the guest referee tonight for no reason anyone not named HHH can figure out.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk has more or less been turned face by the will of the crowd alone. Feeling out process to start with Punk grabbing a headlock and SHOUTING spots into Cena’s ear. Cena easily takes him down to the mat and slaps on a headlock. That gets him nowhere so Punk gets up and we have a quick staredown. Cena grabs a single leg and slaps on an armbar followed by a chinlock. Back up and Punk hits a quick leg lariat before hooking a chinlock of his own with a bodyscissors.

Cena powers out and hooks a quick fisherman’s suplex before hooking another chinlock. The fans chant Fruity Pebbles and WE WANT ICE CREAM as Punk gets up a quick big boot to the jaw. HHH hasn’t been a factor so far. A few knees to the ribs and a headbutt to the shoulder set up another bodyscissors from Punk as we’re barely in second gear nearly eight minutes into the match. Cena escapes again and they fight over a suplex off the apron. Neither guy can go anywhere so Punk kicks Cena in the head to knock him outside.

Back in again and Punk cranks on a neck lock but Cena stands up and suplexes out of it. Cena tries to speed things up but the shoulder block is caught by a knee to the head for two. The running knee in the corner misses and now Cena can initiate the finishing sequence, only to have Punk hit a knee to break up the Shuffle. CM tries a kick but gets caught in the STF, only to get to the ropes and counter the ProtoBomb into a downward spiral and a Koji Clutch.

Cena rolls out and puts on the STF but Punk slips in an arm to block most of the pressure before countering into the Anaconda Vice. Cena rolls out of THAT and tries the STF again but Punk crawls out before it goes on full. AWESOME sequence there as the gear has shifted hard. Punk backdrops him to the floor and hits the suicide dive but he bumps his own head in the process. HHH starts counting and gets to nine before going to the floor and throwing both guys back inside.

They slug it out back in the ring but Cena can’t hit the AA. Instead he busts out a GREAT dropkick and hits the Shuffle. The AA is countered again into a sunset flip for two followed by the high kick for two more. Cena escapes the GTS and hits a corner splash (?!?) and a sitout powerslam (that’s more like it) for two. The top rope Fameasser doesn’t get to launch as Punk hits the running knee to the head and the bulldog off the top for two.

Punk loads up another springboard but gets caught in the STF to put him in real trouble. He finally gets to the rope and pops up for a GTS attempt, only to be countered into the AA for a close two. The top rope Fameasser misses again and Punk grabs a quick GTS for two more. HHH still hasn’t been a major factor other than throwing both guys in. The Macho Elbow gets two and Cena goes into straight brawling mode but gets caught by another knee to the chin. GTS #2 connects and the three goes down but Cena’s foot was on the ropes before two.

Rating: B+. The match is good with that sequence in the middle being a big highlight but there’s one major problem for this match: it’s the sequel to Money in the Bank. That’s doomed so many matches over the years and while it didn’t sink this one, it certainly slowed it down a lot. Still though, good stuff here and definitely worthy of a major PPV main event.

Punk takes a victory lap around the ring but won’t shake HHH’s hand. The Game doesn’t seem too mad about it and raises Punk’s hand as the winner. HHH leaves, CM Punk poses, and KEVIN NASH comes in through the crowd and lays out Punk with a Jackknife. Cue Alberto Del Rio, briefcase in hand.

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Kick to the head, Del Rio wins the title to end the show. This would turn into one of the stupidest and most ridiculous stories ever with Nash showing a text asking him to lay out Punk but it turned out he sent it to himself for one more moment in the limelight after a big fan reaction at the Royal Rumble. The end result of all this: HHH beating Nash and Punk.

Overall Rating: A. This is a GREAT show with some awesome matches and some great drama at the end. Now to be fair no one knew what the drama would lead to, but it blew my mind when I watched it at first. The rest of the show is awesome though with the worst match being the Divas. If the biggest torture I have to go through all night is looking at Kelly in those shorts and Eve looking gorgeous all dressed up, so be it. Great show here and well worth seeing.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio/The Miz/R-Truth

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Original: C

Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

Redo: B+

Randy Orton vs. Christian

Original: B+

Redo: A-

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

Redo: B+

CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

Redo: A

Ok the main event isn’t THAT good. I think we’re firmly at the point where my ratings are about the same for most matches.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6