Saturday Night’s Main Event #32 (2020 Redo): The Commercialization Of Wrestlemania

IMG Credit: WWE

Saturday Night’s Main Event #32
Date: March 18, 2006
Location: Cobo Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz

And then there’s this, as we need a two hour commercial for Wrestlemania. The main event is a handicap match between the John Cena/HHH (the Raw main event) and Rey Mysterio/Kurt Angle/Randy Orton (the Smackdown main event), though it could wind up at any part of the show. There’s also Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon in a street fight, which could have some strong potential. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon and Shane McMahon promise to destroy Shawn Michaels tonight.

Shawn Michaels says if he’s going down, Shane is coming with him.

HHH is going to be champion again at Wrestlemania when he beats John Cena. Cue Cena to say HHH is tagging with the champ tonight.

JBL admits that it was a bad idea to challenge Steve Austin to a beer drinking contest but he’ll teach Austin something tonight.

The Boogeyman is coming to get us.

I miss these fifteen second promos. Why don’t we get these things more often today?

Opening sequence.

HHH/John Cena vs. Randy Orton/Kurt Angle/Rey Mysterio

Cena and Orton slug it out to start but Angle tags himself in and suplexes Cena down. There’s another suplex but it’s too early for the Angle Slam. Instead Cena hits a spinebuster as the arena is rather full of smoke from the pyro. HHH comes in so Angle suplexes him for a change. There’s the tag to Rey for a few near falls on HHH until he pokes him in the eye. Cena shoulders Rey down but a headscissors takes HHH over for a change. HHH pulls Cena out of the way of the 619 and blasts Rey with a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with HHH sending Rey hard into the barricade, much to Cena’s annoyance. Cena won’t tag in but Angle does come in to break up a cover off a spinebuster. The sleeper cuts off the EDDIE chants but Rey is out in a hurry. Rey knocks HHH off the top though and hits the moonsault. A dropkick is enough for the hot tag to Orton, who gets beaten up by Cena in a hurry.

The FU hits Orton but HHH Pedigrees Cena and walks out. Actually hold on as HHH comes back and puts Orton on top…and Mysterio breaks up the cover. HHH Pedigrees Mysterio but gets taken out by Angle. There’s an RKO to Angle but Cena counters another RKO into a rollup to finish Orton.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here but it was a good idea to have the pin be a fluke. It also made sense to have such complete insanity for most of the ending, as it fit everything that was going on. None of these people wanted to team together and it wasn’t like this was anything more than a spectacle. They didn’t treat it as anything such either and that was the right idea here.

Cena and HHH pose at each other.

Here’s who is going into the Hall of Fame.

Booker T. has a bad knee and can’t face Boogeyman tonight. Teddy Long cancels the match and Booker limps out of the trainer’s room with Sharmell. They both break into big smiles.

Here are Edge and Lita for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table covered in weapons. Tonight’s guest is Mick Foley, who is so pathetic that all he can do is say a city’s name and put a sock on his hand. That isn’t exactly cutting edge, so Edge wants him out here right now for the Wrestlemania beating.

Cue Foley, with Edge lighting the table on fire. Foley turns it over and beats Edge up before pouring out the thumbtacks. Lita gets in a cheap shot though and Edge knocks Foley onto the tacks. Foley gets up, smiles, and chases Edge up the ramp for a neckbreaker. He even gets extra violent with a Conchairto. Once Edge started talking, this whole thing was only about six minutes long.

Long recap on Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels. They’ve done a very good job of making me want to see Shawn superkick his head off so well done on the build.

Sharmell and Booker have gotten changed and dance in happiness. Cue Boogeyman from the ceiling and they run off screaming through the hall.

It’s time for the beer drinking contest between Steve Austin and JBL, who Texas Two Steps out of the limo. After another opening sequence for the second hour (or second hour and ten minutes or so), JBL talks about how happy NBC is to have him on the show. JBL gets in the insults to Detroit, including the jokes about the carmakers, the labor unions, the mayor, and of course the sports teams. He’ll win the US Title at Wrestlemania and make everything better, but here’s Austin in the truck to cut him off.

Austin says it’s good to be on this show and back in Detroit, but he’s thirsty. He doesn’t understand why JBL challenged him to the contest and thinks JBL is about 6’1 and 205lbs. JBL tries to correct him and talks about drinking a case of beer for breakfast and fifteen pitchers for lunch. That sends JBL into a rant about how Austin tries to buck the system but here are the rules for the contest. Austin: “All right.”

JBL has Canadian beer and they each have 25 beers with a minute to drink each. He insists that they go back to back, with JBL insisting that he isn’t Brokeback Mountain. Austin: “No comment.” JBL mentions the one minute time limit and Austin asks if he’s a one minute man. JBL: “You been talking to my wife?” They start, with JBL pouring his beer out instead of drinking it. Austin calls him out so JBL throws a beer at him and runs. Cue Chris Benoit to throw JBL back in for more beer dousing and the Stunner to complete the extended cameo.

Candice Michelle and Victoria admire Candice’s Playboy cover.

Candice Michelle/Victoria vs. Trish Stratus/Mickie James

JR: “Mickie James is a little psycho.” We get a recap of Mickie’s obsession with Trish and we’re ready to go. Trish and Candice start things off, so of course we get the Go Daddy dance. Candice chokes away both with hands and rope, allowing Victoria to get in a kick to the face. The slingshot flipping legdrop gives Victoria two and we hit the front facelock. The fans are rather pleased with Mickie bouncing on the bottom rope to cheer Trish on and Trish throws Victoria off. Victoria is smart enough to knock Mickie off the ropes, only to walk into Stratusfaction for the fast pin.

Post match Mickie says this is goodbye, but she wants to say it the right way. She tries to kiss Trish but only gets the cheek, allowing Mickie to hit the Chick Kick and scream a lot. Mickie even hits the Stratusfaction, with Lawler saying she doesn’t get even but she gets odd.

During the break, Mickie says she loved Trish and shouts if Trish loves her now.

Wrestlemania rundown, including Booker T. vs. Boogeyman.

Here are Mark Henry and Daivari for a chat. After a video on Henry attacking Undertaker and the casket match being set up as a result and a break, Daivari rants about how Henry isn’t scared of anything, including Undertaker. Henry says Undertaker is afraid of him and he will shove Undertaker into the coffin.

There’s the gong and the druids bring out the casket, followed by Undertaker himself. After the long entrance, the slugout is on with Henry running him over. They head outside with Undertaker whipping him into the steps and then chokeslamming Daivari onto the casket. A Tombstone puts him onto the casket as well as Henry is gone.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

Street fight and Vince is here with Shane. Shawn runs up the ramp to jump Shane and we start in a hurry. A chair goes over Shane’s back and Shawn loads up an early table. Vince gets in a cheap shot from behind to put Shawn down though and Shane throws in a ladder. Shawn goes back first into the post twice in a row and Shane climbs the ladder. Shawn doesn’t stay on the table long though and superplexes Shane from the ladder (in the ring) through the tables (on the floor) for the huge crash to send us to a break.

Back with Shawn knocking Shane down again and loading up the ladder in the corner. Shawn climbs said ladder but Vince gets in a few kendo stick shots to the back to knock him back down. Shane drops the ladder onto Shawn’s back and Vince is rather pleased. It works so well that Shane does it again for two and there’s the running ladder shot to the face for the same. We hit the double arm crank for a breather but Shawn is up with a DDT. Shane is fine enough to chair him in the face but Coast To Coast misses, with Shawn pulling Vince in the way of the trashcan.

There’s the flying forearm into the nipup and the comeback is on. The top rope elbow connects and Sweet Chin Music does the same, only to have Vince pull the referee out. Shawn goes after Vince but Shane gets in a low blow, setting up the Sharpshooter. Vince immediately calls for the bell to give Shane the win. JR: “Michaels has been castrated of his dignity!” JR never was one to let things feel small.

Rating: B-. They beat each other up well, but that big superplex spot was a weird thing to put in the first half of the match. It worked out well enough though and the anger continues to build in Shawn, to the point where he should be ready to annihilate Vince at Wrestlemania. It was a story building match, but it was entertaining at the same time.

Overall Rating: C. This was nothing but a big commercial for Wrestlemania and in that sense it worked out well enough. Nothing on here is overly bad and the show really did seem to fly by. It isn’t a show you need to see, but it also isn’t anything that you would regret watching. The energy was there and for a one off special to set up a big show, it was perfectly fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 17, 2006: It’s All Set

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 17, 2006
Location: CenturyTelCenter, Bossier City, Louisiana
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Saturday Night’s Main Event, which is the last real stop on the Road to Wrestlemania. Things have been a little strange as of late as we have been building towards both shows at once, but Saturday Night is just a commercial for Wrestlemania anyway. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at last week’s main event tag and Undertaker challenging Mark Henry for the Wrestlemania casket match to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lumberjack match. Lashley kicks Finlay outside to start and Finlay gets to beat up the lumberjacks. Back in and Lashley pulls him away from the ropes for a crash to the mat. A clothesline into a backdrop sends Finlay outside again and it’s time for the big staredown between everyone involved. Some cheap shots from the lumberjacks put Lashley down so Finlay throws him outside again to keep up the beating. The chinlock goes on back inside, followed by some forearms to the back.

Those just annoy Lashley, so Finlay sends him outside for more lumberjack fun. Finlay misses a charge into the post though and Lashley pops off a belly to belly. A clothesline gives Lashley two and there’s the one armed delayed vertical suplex. Lashley throws Finlay onto the lumberjacks and then goes outside to beat on him some more. I’m not sure if he understands the idea of a lumberjack match. Back in and Sylvan grabs a chair, but Lashley takes him down. The distraction works though as Finlay gets in the shillelagh shot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as they were beating the heck out of each other but they kept going with the lumberjacks to make things a little off. What we had was a good brawl though and I liked all of the physicality. Sometimes you need to just throw people in there and have them beat each other up, which worked out well enough with two power guys like them.

Wrestlemania Big Time Moment: the Gimmick Battle Royal. Works for me.

MNM is gawking over Vince McMahon’s Muscle and Fitness cover and admiring his glutes. Melina comes up to take it away, revealing that they are looking at Candice Michelle’s Playboy. She keeps it for her own personal use. Nitro: “What are you going to do with it?” Melina: “Use your imagination.” Melina walks over to Kristal Marshall and says that she’s beautiful in the Divas Magazine, but Kristal needs to learn her place around here. Paul Burchill comes up so Melina call MNM over. Burchill whips out the sword and the villains run off.

William Regal/Jillian Hall vs. Kristal Marshall/Paul Burchill

Regal keeps stealing glances at Jillian in her gear. The women fight over a lockup to start with Jillian sending her into the corner. That allows commentary to discuss their gear, as commentary tends to do around here. Regal tries to break things up and gets slapped in the face so Burchill comes in for a running crossbody. A shove out of the corner puts Burchill down though and Regal kicks him in the head (simple things can work just fine). We hit the chinlock but Burchill fights up and it’s back to the women for the catfighting. Since that can’t last long, Burchill comes back in for the C4 to finish Regal in a hurry.

Rating: D+. It really is amazing to see the differences between people with Wrestlemania stories and people who are destined for the pre-show battle royal. They’re fighting over a magazine and Burchill’s choice to be a pirate, which doesn’t exactly make me think much of them going into the biggest show of the year. Then again I’m a sucker for most pirate shenanigans so this was entertaining in a few ways.

Sharmell and Booker are in the back with Sharmell screaming about how scared she is of the Boogeyman. Booker has a box for her though and knows everything will be ok.

Verne Gagne Hall of Fame video.

Booker T. vs. Jeremy Young

Sharmell is in a beekeeper’s suit. Booker runs Young over as Sharmell continues to panic on the floor. Some more shots to the face let Booker stomp him down in the corner and there’s a spinebuster to cut off the comeback. The ax kick finishes Young.

Rating: D. Yeah I don’t think there’s any secret to what they were going for here. I’m hoping they wrap up the Boogeyman stuff sooner rather than later as it is the kind of story that was fun once or twice (and that’s a stretch) and now it’s just silly. Well sillier that is. Let him be a special attraction if he has to be on the show, but having him with big names like this is a little too much.

Post match Boogeyman’s music plays so Booker and Sharmell hide underneath the ring. Guess who they find under there.

We look at last week’s main event again.

We get a sitdown interview with Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio and Kurt Angle. Orton cuts Cole off to ask Angle how healthy he is after last week’s attacks. Angle thinks it’s funny and loads up the broken freaking neck line but Orton cuts him off as well because we’ve heard it before. As for Mysterio, Orton is going to embarrass him at Wrestlemania because he doesn’t belong in the main event. Angle calls out Orton for not respecting Mysterio, who beat Orton to win the Royal Rumble.

Orton says Angle is a paper champion who won the title in a battle royal that Orton wasn’t even in. That sends Angle into a rant about Orton being a one time champion who held it for a month. Mysterio says he’ll win the title at Wrestlemania because dreams come true. Rey says he will have Angle’s back tonight and tomorrow, but that won’t be the case at Wrestlemania. Angle doesn’t want it any other way and Orton promises to dominate in all three matches. This didn’t add much but it worked well enough and reinforced what was already set up.

The Miz is coming.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Road Warrior Animal vs. Matt Hardy

Matt slugs away to start and gets shoved down. That’s fine with Matt as he takes Animal down and hammers away again. Animal goes after Matt’s banged up knee, which only draws up some louder HARDY chants. The leg cranking is on but Matt uses the good leg to kick him away. A reverse DDT into the Side Effect gets two and there’s another Side Effect to send Animal into the corner. Matt unloads in the corner but almost hits the referee, allowing Animal to get in a brass knuckles shot for the pin.

Rating: D. I’m not exactly expecting this to stand as even 2006 Smackdown isn’t insane enough to put Animal in a big match at Summerslam. The match was nothing of course because it’s Animal, but what else were you expecting? Was there really a rub to get from beating an old member of half of the Legion of Doom?

Post match the referee sees the knuckles and reverses the decision to send Matt to Wrestlemania. Dang Matt really can’t catch a break. Yeah he’s going to Wrestlemania, but he has to keep heat on Animal?

Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and JBL is on commentary with a cooler of beer to hype up the beer drinking contest with Steve Austin. Benoit goes straight to the suplex to set up the corner chops. Jordan is sent outside for more chops, allowing Benoit to glare at JBL. Back in and Jordan takes him down by the arm as JBL goes into one of his rather intense rants about Austin meaning nothing in Texas. Benoit fights out of an armbar and snaps off the German suplexes. JBL: “I GOT FIRED IN GERMANY ONE TIME AND I REALLY DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT!” The Sharpshooter finishes Jordan.

Rating: D+. These two had to set some kind of a record for facing each other in matches that weren’t all that good. It isn’t like Jordan is making anyone look good as he’s someone out there to get beaten up with no doubt about who is winning. Can we see what Benoit can do against a stuff giraffe named Irving instead?

Post match JBL hits Benoit with the cooler (good shot too).

We look back at Mark Henry costing Kurt Angle the World Title two weeks ago.

Mark Henry isn’t scared of the casket or the Streak. Tomorrow, Undertaker can come face him on Saturday Night’s Main Event.

MNM/Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle/Randy Orton/Rey Mysterio

Melina and Daivari are here with the villains and Angle has bad ribs from last week. Orton slaps Nitro before the bell and it’s Angle top wristlocking Nitro to start. Mercury comes in and gets a knee to Angle’s ribs to take over in the corner. Angle’s ribs are fine enough to snap off a belly to belly and it’s off to Rey. The springboard moonsault gets two on Mercury and a spinning bulldog to Nitro gets the same.

Mysterio gets sent into the corner though and Henry comes in to step on Rey’s chest. The splash misses though and Rey hammers away in the corner, only to have Orton distract the referee so Daivari can get in a cheap shot. That of course means an EDDIE chant, because that’s all Rey means these days. We take a break and come back with Melina slapping Mysterio.

A headscissors choke on the apron (with the camera cutting to the other side of the ring because the skirt is a little short) keeps Rey down and Nitro drops an elbow on Rey’s back. Henry comes back in for the gorilla press drop but another splash misses. An enziguri allows the diving tag to Angle, as Orton stops to fix his boot. Angle starts cleaning house as everything breaks down, including the Angle Slam to Henry. There’s the 619 to Nitro but Orton tags himself in and throws Mysterio outside to steal the pin on Nitro.

Rating: C. And yes, the Tag Team Champions lose again. It was to a bigger name, but can we go a few weeks without them losing? Just for a change of pace? Anyway, this was another way of enforcing things that we already know, because there isn’t much else that can be done to set up the triple threat. That’s not good with two weeks to go before Wrestlemania, but it isn’t the deepest story in the world.

Overall Rating: C-. This was another show that bounced back and forth between building to Saturday Night’s Main Event and Wrestlemania but it didn’t work as well as Raw. The triple threat match is as set as it is going to be, though it was nice to have the three of them not bring up Eddie every few seconds. The wrestling wasn’t great, but that is rarely the point this time of year. Not a bad show, but the build for Wrestlemania is just tightening up everything that is already set, plus some MITB qualifying. That could make for some fairly week shows on the way to Chicago, but this could have been worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2011 (2016 Redo): Because Of A Text

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This is a pretty big show with the blowoffs to two amazing feuds. The headlining act match is CM Punk vs. John Cena in a champion vs. champion match and the rematch to their masterpiece a month earlier. The match I was more excited about though was Christian vs. Randy Orton in one of the most underrated feuds in recent years. Let’s get to it.

The guitarist from Tool plays the national anthem.

The opening video talks about a domino effect, triggered by CM Punk winning the Raw World Title back in Chicago at Money in the Bank. As a result, Vince McMahon was stripped of power (for all of a few months) and John Cena became the other Raw World Champion. Tonight it’s champion vs. champion and nothing else is worth talking about.

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Mysterio had beaten Miz to win the vacant Raw World Champion so Miz attacked him on Raw to help set this up. This is in during the full on Cole Love Miz period and the annoyance begins early. Before the match Miz complains about not being on the show but here’s R-Truth to complain about various letters. He doesn’t like spiders and Summerslam or Cee Lo Green performing so S and C are on his bad list. Cue Alberto (Mr. Raw Money in the Bank) to cut him off and we’re finally ready to go.

Morrison and Del Rio are both WAY over here but it’s Kofi vs. Miz to get things going. A double flapjack with Morrison helping out plants Miz and we get stereo nipups. Morrison gets all fired up to hammer on Truth because their partnership from a few years ago just means nothing to him. Everything breaks down for a bit with Morrison being knocked off the top rope to change control.

Miz grabs the chinlock but gets kicked in the head to knock him silly. It’s back to Kofi as things speed up and the SOS counters the Skull Crushing Finale for two. Everything breaks down for a bit and Miz hits a Diamond Cutter into a 1%er for two. I’m still not wild on that move but Kofi’s selling made it look better. The heels start taking turns on Kofi with Del Rio starting in on the arm and mocking Kofi’s clapping taunt.

Miz gets two off a clothesline as Cole sings his praises, even listing off Miz’s high school accolades. A double stomp allows the hot tag to Rey, who comes in to a roar. Mysterio starts cleaning house but Del Rio breaks up a double 619. Morrison dives onto Alberto and Truth takes the 619, followed by a top rope splash for the pin at 9:36.

Rating: B-. Take six guys and give them ten minutes to have a fun opener. I like a good six man tag and it can accomplish multiple goals in a short span. For some reason though WWE feels that the only kinds of matches you can have are singles, regular tags and triple threats so we don’t get enough of something like this. If nothing else it gave the fans a lot to cheer about in a short time, meaning they’re ready to go early on. Well done indeed.

Executive Vice President of Talent Relations Johnny Ace (you get tired just listing his job title) wants CM Punk to publicly apologize for embarrassing him on Monday. Punk says he’s sorry and offers a big grin but he turns around to see Stephanie. The champ insults the men in her life but she doesn’t seem phased. Stephanie: “But what would I know? I’m just Vince McMahon’s clueless daughter.” Punk: “Yeah pretty much.” Stephanie offers a handshake for luck but Punk says no because he knows where that hand has been. WHY CAN NO ONE BURN STEPHANIE LIKE THIS TODAY???

We recap Mark Henry vs. Sheamus. This was during Henry’s rampage over everyone in his path and his Hall of Pain period. No one was left for him to beat so Sheamus, a heel at the time, came out and simply said “I’ll fight him.” I still really like that line as it sums up everything and gives you a reason to like Sheamus in two seconds. Simple, yet effective.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Henry shoves him around to start but Sheamus comes back with knees to the ribs and forearms to the back. The Irish Curse attempt is easily shrugged away though and Sheamus is tossed outside. Back in and Henry does the running crotch attack to the back of Sheamus’ head, followed by a backbreaker for your run of the mill heel offense.

An over the shoulder backbreaker keeps Sheamus in trouble but Henry misses a Vader Bomb. That means it’s time for forearms to the chest but a double shoulder puts both guys down. Sheamus is up first and the Brogue Kick knocks Henry to the floor. Ever the not that bright good guy though, Sheamus goes out after him and gets driven though the barricade for the countout at 9:22.

Rating: C+. I like that finish a lot as they made Sheamus look like a real threat with the Brogue Kick and then didn’t have him get pinned. The important thing here though was Henry looking unstoppable as he was on the way to the World Title soon after this. Smart booking here and everyone comes out looking like they should.

Christian has an insurance policy for his match against Randy Orton. It’s going to be a summer blockbuster and he’ll be like Harry Potter. Orton on the other hand will be like Cowboys and Aliens: an overrated, overproduced and overhyped flop. Hey now that movie was underrated.

Cee Lo Green does his mini concert for reasons I don’t understand. Bright Lights, Bigger City is catchy though. Some Divas come out to dance during Forget You.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is defending in your standard Barbie vs. monster feud and has Eve Torres in her corner. Beth on the other hand has Natalya. Kelly goes straight after her to start and fires off some forearms in the corner to send Beth outside, followed by a middle rope cross body to the floor. Back in and Beth knocks her out of the corner to take over before we hit a quick chinlock. An over the shoulder backrbeaker (good move for Beth) has Kelly in trouble and Beth ties her in the Tree of Woe to make it even worse. Kelly gets knocked around in the corner but counters the Glam Slam into a victory roll to retain at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Total squash for the most part here with a fluke ending, albeit the same fluke ending to almost every Kelly vs. Beth match ever. Kelly certainly got her push because of her looks but she was getting much better in the ring near the end of her career with matches like this one being far more watchable than some of the disasters that the division hard around this time.

Stephanie leaves John Cena’s locker room. For some reason we have to see the Cena logo twice for the announcers to catch on.

R-Truth is annoyed about getting ripped off so Jimmy Hart of all people offers his managerial services. Truth agrees but realizes that Jimmy is named….uh, Jimmy, and freaks out. Ron Artest and his daughter are shown watching for a worthless cameo.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

Fallout from Money in the Bank where Bryan won by knocking Barrett off the ladder. Bryan doesn’t have his Flight of the Valkyries (yes Flight, which was the name of his WWE theme instead of Ride) theme song yet and it’s really weird to have it missing. Daniel starts in with the kicks and works on the arm as Booker talks about Daniel’s diet.

Bryan fights out of a wristlock and dropkicks Barrett down before bending Barrett’s shoulders around in a variety of painful looking ways. The running dropkick in the corner and a running kick to the chest, only to walk into the yet to be named (or at least not named here) Winds of Change. Barrett fires off his knees in the ropes and kicks Bryan out to the floor.

Back in and we hit the chinlock before Daniel escapes the Wasteland, setting up a running knee off the apron. Barrett’s pumphandle slam doesn’t work and it’s time for the yet to be named YES Kicks. Again, those chants really add a lot. The guillotine goes on and Barrett gets taken down into the LeBell Lock, only to reach over to the rope for the break. Bryan gets crotched on top though and Barrett hits a quick Wasteland for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B. I still really like this match as it’s two guys beating on each other for the better part of twelve minutes until one of them can’t get up again. Barrett was the bigger star at this point as Bryan really was just a guy in trunks at this point, albeit one with a huge upside. Sometimes you just need a good wrestling match without a lot of meaning behind it and that’s what you got here.

The California National Guard is here.

We recap Christian vs. Randy Orton in a feud that has been going on for months. Christian lost the title less than a week after winning it and then wanted one more match. Orton eventually lost the title via DQ at Money in the Bank, setting up the rematch here with No Holds Barred. This is one of the best feuds in a long time and would have won Feud of the Year had it not been for Cena vs. Punk. It was perfectly put together and one great match after another. The two of them had chemistry together and that’s the most important thing you can do.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Christian is defending and this is no holds barred but first the champ has a big surprise for everyone as he brings out Edge. After an insane ovation, Edge thanks the fans but reminds them that he can never compete again due to his neck injuries. He was kind of glad that he left when he did though because it opened the door for Christian to become champion.

Christian lost the title five days after winning it and then complained about it for week after week. He just whined until he got his way and then won the title via disqualification. Edge might have done some dastardly things in his time but he did it with some style. Somewhere along the way, Christian became a disgrace to himself. Edge isn’t going to help him tonight and leaves Christian all alone.

Orton starts hammering away in the corner and backdrops Christian to set up the circle stomp and a knee drop for two. They head outside but Christian is smart enough to run away from an RKO through the announcers’ table. Christian grabs the title and runs into the crowd but Orton easily catches him (hint: it’s the guy in wrestling gear carrying a big gold belt) and sends it back inside.

The champ sends him shoulder first into the post (completely legal remember, even though you’ll almost never hear it called a DQ in the first place) to take over. It’s kendo stick time as we hit the standard street fight tropes. Christian misses a shot though and has to settle with an elbow to Orton’s jaw. There’s an interesting story here with Christian not being able to pull off the cheating but doing just fine with the wrestling. Orton grabs a rollup for two but gets caught in a spinebuster for the same.

It’s kendo stick time again but Christian dives into a dropkick to the ribs to keep up the subtle story. Orton can’t get in a stick shot either as the no holds barred rule hasn’t played a big role yet. The elevated DDT is countered into a Killswitch attempt which is countered into Orton’s backbreaker. He can’t hit the Punt but Christian can’t crotch him against the post as Orton uses his legs to pull Christian face first into the post instead.

Now it’s time for the real weapons as Orton pulls out some tables but Christian gets in a shot from behind and sets one up on the floor. Back in and Christian goes up top, only to get superplexed down onto an unset table for a unique spot. It also gets a near fall but that’s not as important. That table is set up in the corner but Christian has to counter the RKO by sending him to the floor. Orton sends him knees first into the steps, only to have Christian send him head first into the steps.

Next up it’s a monitor off Orton’s head to knock him onto the announcers’ table. Like any cocky heel would do though, Christian tries an RKO but gets caught in the real thing through the table for a double KO spot. Back in and Christian gets two off a Killswitch and you can hear the fans going nuts on the near fall. Well deserved too. With the table still looming in the table and another one at ringside, Christian opts for two chairs.

That’s enough for Orton as he takes one away and cracks Christian over the back, followed by a second one to send the champ off the apron and through the first table. Orton brings in the steps and some trashcans but Christian avoids a stomp onto the steps. He can’t avoid a powerslam through the table or a DDT onto the trashcan as this is getting brutal. Christian blocks the RKO with a kendo stick shot, only to have Orton hit another one a few seconds later to win the title back at 23:43.

Rating: A. I love this feud and the matches get better and better every time. There was a great story here of Christian being able to compete in the wrestling but being in WAY over his head against Orton, who has that evil streak in him. This started off as more of a wrestling match with Christian poking his toe into the violence but then embracing it full on, only to be destroyed by the more violent Orton. It’s a great story with a great match to go with it and that’s as good as it gets.

Video on WWE taking over Los Angeles for the week, including an Axxess.

We recap John Cena vs. CM Punk in a narrated video. Punk won the Raw World Title from Cena last month in a masterpiece, only to leave the company with the title immediately after. Cena won the title a few weeks later but Punk came out that night (good thing he just happened to be there), setting up a champion vs. champion match to see who really is the best man. Ignore the fact that they already established that fact at Money in the Bank when Punk beat him in the first place. Due to Punk leaving under Vince’s watch, the Board of Directors replaced Vince as boss with HHH, who Punk hates in general.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and HHH is guest referee. As expected, Punk is now a mega face and gets a big old pop, much to HHH’s annoyance. Cena on the other hand is booed out of the building as you kind of have to expect as well. Feeling out process to start with Punk grabbing a headlock for that horribly blatant spot calling. Punk was on a roll at this point but he was as bad as Shawn Michaels at hiding that stuff.

The dueling chants start up and sound even louder than usual, as they should at a major show. Now it’s Cena working a headlock into an armbar before Punk hits a leg lariat for two. Cena takes him down into a chinlock as this is firmly in first gear over five minutes in. The fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. True but at least he still is a wrestler and not someone who has been waiting two years for a UFC fight.

Punk finally escapes and puts Cena down for a breather, earning a loud CM PUNK chant. Off to a body vice as this match seems to be collapsing under the weight of the expectations from the previous match. Back up and Punk snaps his throat across the top rope to block a superplex attempt, followed by dropkicking Cena out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Punk grabs a seated abdominal stretch, only to have Cena power up into a spinning slam for a breather. Fans: “FRUITY PEBBLES!”

The finishing sequence is countered by Punk’s headlock takeover but he gets caught in the ProtoBomb. Punk comes right back with an enziguri and a Koji Clutch (I love that move) which is countered into an STF which is countered into the Anaconda Vice (Not a key lock Booker. Learn your details.). That actually gets some near falls until Cena reverses into a crossface to continue this pretty awesome sequence. Punk gets to the ropes and sends Cena outside for a suicide dive to put both guys down again.

HHH, who has been a total non-factor for the first fifteen minutes, gets to nine but can’t bring himself to finish the countout. Instead he throws both of them back inside and it’s time for the big strike off. Cena takes over with a dropkick and the Shuffle but the AA is countered into a sunset flip and kick to the head for two each. Cena’s sitout powerslam gets the same, as does Punk’s middle rope bulldog.

A very weary Punk’s springboard clothesline is countered into the STF but they haven’t traded enough finishers yet. Speaking of finishers, Cena gets two off the AA. The GTS gets the same result with Punk staring up at HHH in shock. Punk comes up holding his knee though but drops the top rope elbow for two anyway. Cena pounds Punk down but eats a running knee to the face, setting up the GTS for the pin at 24:08, despite Cena’s foot clearly being on the rope.

Rating: B+. This match would be remembered so much more fondly if it wasn’t for the fact that they had such a masterpiece just a month earlier. They had to try and follow that up and it just couldn’t be done. The screwy ending didn’t help things, just like having HHH out there for the sake of waiting on a screwy finish that doesn’t seem to mean much since this is a night when instant replay doesn’t exist.

HHH applauds Punk post match and raises his hand before leaving. Punk poses….but here’s Kevin Nash through the crowd to lay Punk out. That means Alberto time and here we go.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Punk is defending and loses the title to an enziguri in eleven seconds.

A quick celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. This show is nothing short of excellent with only the Divas Title match being short of good (and seeing Kelly Kelly in shorts is never a bad thing). Orton vs. Christian is great stuff with a great story, the main event is awesome, Barrett vs. Bryan is a hidden gem, the crowd is white hot all night and the rest is all worth watching…..until you get to the ending.

That’s where the show falls apart as not only did the ending only make limited sense here but it would turn into one of the biggest messes anyone had seen in a few short weeks. Somehow Punk wouldn’t get his rematch next month because he was busy jobbing to HHH in the main event of Night of Champions.

Oh and Nash? Yeah he sent himself a text message telling him to come out there right then because he wanted one more crowd reaction. That’s how they followed up on the potentially hottest angle in years: Kevin Nash sent himself a text message and HHH pinned CM Punk, setting up HHH vs. Nash, who never fought Punk in this whole thing. Such is life in WWE, or out of WWE actually and you can’t blame Punk after all that.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2016 Redo: B-

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2016 Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2016 Redo: A

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B+

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2016 Redo: A

I think we can call this my definitive thoughts on the show as the ratings were almost identical in the last two reviews. Definitely check this one out.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2011-a-screwy-ending-isnt-a-bad-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2011 (2013 Redo): I Still Love It

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This year has been all about the rise of CM Punk. In June he sat on the stage and ripped into John Cena and the WWE in general, leading up to the world title match at Money in the Bank in Chicago. Punk won the title in a masterpiece and then left the company as champion. Cena won the title from Rey Mysterio on Raw, but Punk came back with his title. Tonight it’s champion vs. champion for the undisputed title. Oh and Christian vs. Orton in the blowoff to the underrated feud of the year. Let’s get to it.

Adam Jones, some guitarist from Tool, plays the Star Spangled Banner. WE WANT MAN MOUNTAIN ROCK!

The opening video is about how Summerslam being where dreams are made. We shift to a shot of dominoes falling over. Punk talks about being the first domino being knocked over and starting a revolution. HHH is guest referee tonight because what would a major match be without him?

The theme song this year is Bright Lights Bigger City by Cee Lo Green. I usually don’t care for him but it fits the show well.

The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/R-Truth vs. Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio

Cole IMMEDIATELY freaks out over Miz being on Summerslam. Miz keeps talking about how awesome he is until Truth cuts him off. This was when Truth was insane so he complains about things that start with the letter S, like spiders, Summerslam, Cee Loo Green and Conspiracy. Del Rio is the Raw MITB winner. The fans are WAY into Del Rio here for some reason. Mysterio gets a title shot at Punk or Cena tomorrow on Raw. Miz and Kofi get things going and the fans are actually behind Miz as well. Kofi hits a nice monkey flip followed by a dropkick before bringing in Morrison.

A double clothesline puts Miz down and the good guys do stereo nipups in a nice visual. Off to Truth who is tackled by Morrison but comes back with right hands to the face. Truth sends Morrison to the floor as the announcers talk about wigs. Thankfully Booker is there to get us back to the action by shouting BACK TO THE ACTION! Miz comes in with a kick to the head and puts on a chinlock, only to have Morrison kick him in the head to escape.

Kofi comes flying in off the hot tag and cleans house with his barrage of high flying offense including a cross body to Miz for two. The Boom Drop gets two and everything breaks down. Kofi gets two off the SOS but Del Rio breaks up the pin. Miz hits a kind of Diamond Cutter face plant for two and it’s Kofi in trouble from the boots of R-Truth. Del Rio comes in with a belly to back suplex and mocks Kofi’s Trouble in Paradise hand slap.

Kofi kicks him away but Miz breaks up a hot tag bid. Cole lists off Miz’s high school accomplishments as Kofi flips out of a sunset flip and stomps on Miz’s ribs to put him down. Hot tag brings in Rey to face Truth who does his usual backflip/splits sequence, only to have Rey kick him in the head. Del Rio breaks up a double 619 so only Truth takes the kick. Kofi dives on Miz and Rey hits a top rope splash on Truth for the pin.

Rating: B-. Take six guys, give them ten minutes and let them have fun. It’s an idea as old as time and it’s still used to this day because it still works. The good guys can fire up any crowd with their high spots and the fans were into the match as a result. As mentioned earlier, Summerslam is great at having good openers and this was no exception.

Johnny Ace wants an apology from Punk over a kick to the head on Monday. Punk gives an over the top apology and Ace walks away. Punk turns around to see Stephanie who wishes him good luck. He makes fun of Vince and she wishes both Cena and Punk good luck. “But I’m just Vince’s clueless daughter right?” Punk: “Yeah pretty much.” She offers him a handshake but he knows where it’s been.

We recap Sheamus vs. Mark Henry. Henry is just starting the Hall of Pain run and has been destroying everyone in sight and breaking a lot of limbs. He stood tall in the ring until Sheamus came out and said three simple words: I’ll fight him. It turned Sheamus face and made him very popular due to the simple idea of standing up to a bully. THIS is how you book Sheamus: have him in there against some monster and taking a good fight to him, not slumming it with Damien Sandow and winning each match with ease.

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Henry takes him down with a clothesline to start but Sheamus comes right back with right hands. The pale one pounds away and actually knocks Henry down to his knees, only to be thrown to the floor. Henry EASILY throws Sheamus through the ropes and hits a splash for two. A running crotch attack crushes Sheamus’ neck but he’s in the ropes before the count starts.

A backbreaker puts Sheamus down and it’s off to an Argentinean backbreaker to complete the set. Sheamus powers out, only to be sent chest first into the corner. Henry misses a Vader Bomb though and Sheamus has a breather. A series of ax handles to the chest and head put Henry down followed by the forearms in the ropes. They clothesline each other down and we get a breather.

Back up and Mark runs into a boot in the corner, allowing Sheamus to go up for the top rope shoulder, good for two. The Brogue Kick misses though and a clothesline puts Sheamus down. Sheamus slips out of the World’s Strongest Slam and there’s the Brogue Kick to knock Henry to the outside. Sheamus follows him to the floor but Henry drives him into the post and through the barricade in a great crash, allowing Mark to beat the count for a countout win.

Rating: C+. This was another simple formula: take two big power brawlers and let them beat the tar out of each other for nearly the minutes. It’s also a smart ending as Sheamus gets to stay strong but Henry gets another win. Sheamus would get a countout win I believe at the next PPV so it evened out. Good, fun brawl here.

World Heavyweight Champion Christian says his match with Orton will be an epic summer blockbuster. He’ll be like Harry Potter, making magic at every turn. Orton will be like Cowboys and Aliens: a flashy flop. That movie was good though.

Trailer for Killer Elite which is probably sponsoring the show or something.

Here’s Cee Lo Green for the mini concert. He looks like he’s in big sparkly pajamas but the song isn’t bad so I’m not complaining much. The fans aren’t moving at all for this but the vocals are pretty bad so I can barely hear a word he’s saying. Now he throws in his bigger hit Forget You, complete with Divas in red dancing behind him.

Now here’s a Slim Jim ad. I’m sure the fans are LOVING this stuff.

Now a 7-11 commercial. My goodness get to something else.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

I could go for a Slurpee. Back to 7-11 it is! Kelly is defending. Beth and Natalya are the Divas of Doom here and don’t like the Barbies like Eve and Kelly. Kelly and those AWESOME little shorts of hers go after Beth and we get the screaming headscissors. Beth is knocked off the apron and Kelly dives off the middle rope to knock her to the floor. Back in and Kelly flips out of the corner and Beth clotheslines her down.

Kelly gets dropped throat first on the top rope for two Eve plays cheerleader. This is a lot of standing around with Beth glaring down at Kelly before hitting a running Umaga shot in the corner. We hit the chinlock followed by the second over the shoulder backbreaker of the night. Kelly finally slips out and hits a quick neckbreaker to put both of them down.

Beth sends her into the Tree of Woe for no follow up before getting two off a side slam. Kelly gets in a knee to the face and goes nuts on Beth, only to have the handspring elbow countered. The Glam Slam is countered into a victory roll for the pin, just like every time Kelly beat Phoenix.

Rating: D+. All things considered, this was something resembling a miracle. The match was nothing of note but Kelly actually didn’t embarrass herself out there. She got WAY better over the years, but at the end of the day she was out there because of how good she looked in those tiny shorts. It also says a lot that less than two years later only Natalya is left from this match.

Stephanie leaves Cena’s locker room for some reason.

Truth and….Jimmy Hart of all people talk about a c-o-n-spiarcy. Jimmy offers to manage him and Truth seems interested before he realizes that Hart is…..LITTLE JIMMY! Truth looks over to see Ron Artest (Metta World Peace) and his daughter in a worthless cameo.

BUY TWIX!

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

I like Barret’s End of Days theme a lot better than the God Save the Queen one now. This is MITB fallout as Bryan knocked Barrett off to win the case. Bryan has some slow music which isn’t all that bad, but soon he would go to Flight of the Valkyries which works far better for him. Bryan is rocking the white trunks with red trim here which are pretty awesome. Feeling out process to start with Barrett punching Bryan down to stop the wrestling part of the match.

Daniel takes it to the mat and spins out of a wristlock before dropkicking Wade down. Cole says Barrett is a submission master as Bryan does the AJ Styles drop down into a dropkick, right down to the same overblown drop down. Back up and Bryan hooks a dragon screw leg whip and a running dropkick in the corner for two. Another kick to the chest gets two and Bryan backflips over Barrett, only to charge into the Winds of Change for two. A slingshot belly to back backbreaker gets two for Wade and we hit a reverse chinlock.

Back up and Bryan hits a running clothesline but Wade comes back with a big running forearm to the face. Wade puts Bryan in the ropes and kicks him out to the floor before hooking a chinlock. The hold doesn’t last long again but Bryan ducks a boot and crotches Barrett on the top. A dropkick puts him on the floor and there’s the flying knee off the apron. Back in again and the missile dropkick gets a close two for the American.

Bryan escapes a pumphandle slam and fires off more kicks to the chest for two. Wade ducks a clothesline and hits a big boot to the face for two but Wasteland is countered into the guillotine choke. Barrett goes down and there’s the LeBell Lock but Wade gets into the ropes for the break. Daniel loads up a superplex but Barrett crotches him on the top rope. A middle rope clothesline takes Bryan off the ropes and Wasteland is good for the 100% clean pin.

Rating: B+. I REALLY liked this for one reason: it was a good wrestling match. It’s a basic story of one guy wanting revenge for a loss in a big match, it had a good story in the ring with a striker against a technical guy and the action was good. Wade Barrett is a guy who can go in the ring but he’s the ultimate jobber to the stars and I have no idea why when he can do this.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Christian. Christian won the title at Extreme Rules but Orton came over to Smackdown to replace Edge as the top guy. Orton won the title on his first night on the show, ending Christian’s title reign in less than a week. Christian wanted one more match, turning heel in the process.

Orton beat him again, but Christian some how got one more match and if Orton got disqualified, he would lose the title. For once, that actually worked and Christian won the title. Tonight, it’s the final match with no holds barred. These matches kept getting better and better and if Punk vs. Cena hadn’t happened it would have run away with feud of the year.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Before the match, Christian brings out Edge to be in his corner to a HUGE ovation. After a full entrance, Edge says that he’ll never be cleared to wrestle again. When he first left, that made him happy because he was able to pass the torch to Christian. Edge didn’t think it was fair that Christian had to defend the title five days after a ladder match and Christian complained too.

Then he complained more and more and more and more. Then he wanted rematch after rematch and FINALLY he won the title back…..but he did it by disqualification. Yeah Edge did some bad things, but he did it with style. He didn’t hide behind lawyers and clipboards. Somewhere along the line Christian became a parody of himself. Edge didn’t know Christian would ever be like this, and that’s not good. Edge drops the mic, walks out, Christian freaks, and here’s Randy.

Remember this is no holds barred. Orton takes him into the corner and stomps him down before hitting a quick clothesline. Christian rakes the eyes and gets a quick one count off a middle rope elbow to the face. A backdrop puts Christian down and Randy stomps away but the champion chokes away on the ropes. Orton loads up the Elevated DDT but gets backdropped to the floor. Really back and forth so far.

Orton sends him head first into the barricade and loads up the announce table. The RKO is blocked and Christian grabs the belt before sprinting into the crowd. Randy catches up with him and stomps Christian down onto the concrete before heading back to ringside. Back in and Orton rains down right hands in the corner. Christian avoids a charge and sends Orton’s famously bad shoulder into the post to take over. The champion brings in a kendo stick to choke away before getting two off a back elbow.

Christian busts out a spinebuster for two and goes to the middle rope, only to be dropkicked out of the air. The powerslam puts Christian down again and now Randy gets the kendo stick. Instead of swinging though he catches Christian’s dropkick into a jackknife cover for two followed by the Thesz Press. Christian escapes the Elevated DDT into a Killswitch attempt but Orton counters into the backbreaker for two. The idea of this feud was that they knew each other so well and they would add another move to the string of counters every match. It was awesome.

Orton can’t hit the Punt but has to send Christian face first into the post to avoid getting crotched against the steel. Randy pulls out a pair of tables and slides one into the ring, only to have Christian drive him into the apron. Christian sets up the other table on the floor and they head inside where Orton superplexes him onto (not through as the table hasn’t been set up yet) the table for two. The table is set up in the corner but Christian counters the whip into the reverse DDT for no cover. Instead he loads up the spear but Orton jumps over and tries the RKO, only to be sent over the top and out to the floor.

Christian goes after him but is sent knees first into the steps to put him down again. Orton takes forever to set up the steps but gets sent face first into the steel again. Christian loads up the other announce table and blasts Orton in the head with the announce table. The champion tries an RKO through the table but gets caught in the real thing to destroy the table instead. Back in and Christian hits a quick Killswitch for two and Christian is furious.

The champion brings in a pair of chairs for the Conchairto but spits on Orton, causing Randy to move away. Now it’s Randy with the chair, cracking it over Christian’s back and knocking him off the apron through the table. Orton throws in some steps and trashcans before catching a charging Christian in a powerslam through the table in the corner.

Some HARD kendo stick shots to the back have Christian in even more trouble and the Elevated DDT crushes a trashcan. Christian tries one more rush but his sunset flip out of the corner is countered into the RKO (same move that gave Orton the title in the first place) onto the steps for the pin and the title.

Rating: A-. Much like the Undertaker vs. Edge Cell match a few years earlier, this was the perfect way to blow off a feud with Orton being the definitive winner. This feud did a great job of building upon itself with the extended sequences carrying over from match to match and building a deep psychology. Great match here and the whole feud is worth checking out.

Video on Axxess.

We recap Punk vs. Cena. As mentioned, Punk left with the title at Money in the Bank so there was a tournament held to crown a new champion. Mysterio won but lost the title to Cena the same night. Punk came out and held up his own belt, meaning we had two champions. This all happened in two weeks when it could have went on for months. The entire match is summed up with one idea: Cena doesn’t know if he can beat Punk. HHH is the new boss and is the guest referee tonight for no reason anyone not named HHH can figure out.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk has more or less been turned face by the will of the crowd alone. Feeling out process to start with Punk grabbing a headlock and SHOUTING spots into Cena’s ear. Cena easily takes him down to the mat and slaps on a headlock. That gets him nowhere so Punk gets up and we have a quick staredown. Cena grabs a single leg and slaps on an armbar followed by a chinlock. Back up and Punk hits a quick leg lariat before hooking a chinlock of his own with a bodyscissors.

Cena powers out and hooks a quick fisherman’s suplex before hooking another chinlock. The fans chant Fruity Pebbles and WE WANT ICE CREAM as Punk gets up a quick big boot to the jaw. HHH hasn’t been a factor so far. A few knees to the ribs and a headbutt to the shoulder set up another bodyscissors from Punk as we’re barely in second gear nearly eight minutes into the match. Cena escapes again and they fight over a suplex off the apron. Neither guy can go anywhere so Punk kicks Cena in the head to knock him outside.

Back in again and Punk cranks on a neck lock but Cena stands up and suplexes out of it. Cena tries to speed things up but the shoulder block is caught by a knee to the head for two. The running knee in the corner misses and now Cena can initiate the finishing sequence, only to have Punk hit a knee to break up the Shuffle. CM tries a kick but gets caught in the STF, only to get to the ropes and counter the ProtoBomb into a downward spiral and a Koji Clutch.

Cena rolls out and puts on the STF but Punk slips in an arm to block most of the pressure before countering into the Anaconda Vice. Cena rolls out of THAT and tries the STF again but Punk crawls out before it goes on full. AWESOME sequence there as the gear has shifted hard. Punk backdrops him to the floor and hits the suicide dive but he bumps his own head in the process. HHH starts counting and gets to nine before going to the floor and throwing both guys back inside.

They slug it out back in the ring but Cena can’t hit the AA. Instead he busts out a GREAT dropkick and hits the Shuffle. The AA is countered again into a sunset flip for two followed by the high kick for two more. Cena escapes the GTS and hits a corner splash (?!?) and a sitout powerslam (that’s more like it) for two. The top rope Fameasser doesn’t get to launch as Punk hits the running knee to the head and the bulldog off the top for two.

Punk loads up another springboard but gets caught in the STF to put him in real trouble. He finally gets to the rope and pops up for a GTS attempt, only to be countered into the AA for a close two. The top rope Fameasser misses again and Punk grabs a quick GTS for two more. HHH still hasn’t been a major factor other than throwing both guys in. The Macho Elbow gets two and Cena goes into straight brawling mode but gets caught by another knee to the chin. GTS #2 connects and the three goes down but Cena’s foot was on the ropes before two.

Rating: B+. The match is good with that sequence in the middle being a big highlight but there’s one major problem for this match: it’s the sequel to Money in the Bank. That’s doomed so many matches over the years and while it didn’t sink this one, it certainly slowed it down a lot. Still though, good stuff here and definitely worthy of a major PPV main event.

Punk takes a victory lap around the ring but won’t shake HHH’s hand. The Game doesn’t seem too mad about it and raises Punk’s hand as the winner. HHH leaves, CM Punk poses, and KEVIN NASH comes in through the crowd and lays out Punk with a Jackknife. Cue Alberto Del Rio, briefcase in hand.

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Kick to the head, Del Rio wins the title to end the show. This would turn into one of the stupidest and most ridiculous stories ever with Nash showing a text asking him to lay out Punk but it turned out he sent it to himself for one more moment in the limelight after a big fan reaction at the Royal Rumble. The end result of all this: HHH beating Nash and Punk.

Overall Rating: A. This is a GREAT show with some awesome matches and some great drama at the end. Now to be fair no one knew what the drama would lead to, but it blew my mind when I watched it at first. The rest of the show is awesome though with the worst match being the Divas. If the biggest torture I have to go through all night is looking at Kelly in those shorts and Eve looking gorgeous all dressed up, so be it. Great show here and well worth seeing.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio/The Miz/R-Truth

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Original: C

Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

Redo: B+

Randy Orton vs. Christian

Original: B+

Redo: A-

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

Redo: B+

CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

Redo: A

Ok the main event isn’t THAT good. I think we’re firmly at the point where my ratings are about the same for most matches.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2011 (Original): The Rematch

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

It’s the biggest party of the summer. Wait that was another ad campaign. It’s Summerfest! No wait that’s a Piven botch. It’s Punk vs. Cena II. Well actually more like their 8th match but the second PPV main event. Seriously that’s the extent of the hype for this show. There’s also Christian vs. Orton V or whatever but that’s really minor by comparison. There’s also a mini concert because those have worked oh so well before right? Let’s get to it.

The guitarist from Tool plays a rock version of the Star Spangled Banner. He’s no Man Mountain Rock.

The opening video is about how we’re in LA and LA is awesome. This is like the 4th year in a row it’s been in LA. Might be three but still that’s a ton. There’s another video about how there’s a domino effect in the Punk vs. Cena war. That Bright Lights Bigger City song is growing on me a bit.

Here’s Miz to open the show and he’ll be in a six man tag. He first has something to say. Why am I not surprised? He says he’s returned to Summerslam and wants to thank the fans for insisting he competes tonight. Miz is cut off by Truth who talks about spiders. They start with the letter S, as does Summerslam. Singing also starts with an S and Cee Lo Green is singing tonight. You know what else starts with a C? CONSPIRACY!!! Del Rio cuts him off to save our sanity.

The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/R-Truth vs. Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio/John Morrison

Well they had to fill in the card with something. Del Rio gets a face reaction from the Hispanic heavy crowd. Kofi has white shorts now. Morrison, the hometown boy, gets NOTHING. We get a recap of Rey getting jumped by Miz on Monday. The rest of the feuds I think you know. The bell rings almost 15 minutes into the show. Miz vs. Kofi to start us off. There’s a Miz is Awesome chant.

Big monkey flip and a dropkick put Miz down. Off to Morrison and we get double flapjacks/double nipups. Nice fast paced stuff to start so far. Off to Truth vs. Morrison and Truth isn’t afraid anymore. There’s the springboard spin kick (Moonlight Drive I think? It’s the same one Cody uses for the most part) but it only gets two. The heels cheat (EVIL!) and send Morrison to the floor to shift momentum.

Off to Miz who hooks a chinlock which eats up some time. Morrison fights out of it with something resembling a Pele kick (ala AJ) and it’s warm tag Kofi. That cross body is SWEET. Miz takes him down and every heel not named Alberto works him over. Time for Kofi to imitate a long haired blonde guy from the 80s who thought he could sing named Morton for a good while.

We’re just waiting on the hot tag to Rey at this point. And yep there it is. The seated kick to Truth gets two. 619 is broken up and a second is as well. Rey makes up for that by hitting one to Truth and Miz at the same time. Everything breaks down and the faces all start diving like a broke boxer in Vegas. The ring is cleared and Rey hits the top rope splash on Truth for the pin at 9:30.

Rating: B-. Solid opener here which was very fast paced. That’s exactly what the opening match is supposed to be. You had to get a bunch of these guys on the show somehow and this is as good a way as any. I like these random tag matches because you combine feuds and manage to get a fun match too. Not everything needs to have some epic backstory to it to be a good match and this is proof of it. Good stuff.

Johnny Ace demands a public apology from Punk for getting kicked in the head. Well Ace is certainly annoying already so he’s doing his job. Punk mockingly apologizes and Ace leaves. Punk turns around and there’s the still hot Stephanie. She says HHH, Cena and Vince have all wished him good luck. He kind of says she’s brainless and she offers him a handshake anyway. “I would but I know where that hand has been.”

Recap of Henry vs. Sheamus which is basically about Sheamus being the only guy willing to fight Henry. That’s still a cool moment.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

I can’t imagine this going long. Sheamus gets in a few shots early on but then the beating begins. Henry hammers on Sheamus and we head to the floor where Henry gorilla presses Sheamus into the ring through the top and middle ropes. That was kind of awesome. Splash gets two. There’s a backbreaker and now an over the shoulder body vice.

The pale one fights out of it and manages to take Henry down for a moment. Emphasis on the moment aspect though as Henry takes him down again. The Vader Bomb misses though and Sheamus starts his comeback. A flying axehandle puts him on the mat and Sheamus starts dropping some knees. He fires off the forearms to the chest when Henry is caught in the ropes.

Sheamus hits the ropes and they collide, sending both guys down for a few seconds. The Irishman hits a top rope shoulder block for two. The cord is of course hot here because it’s LA and it’s a wrestling town. Sheamus pounds his chest but the Brogue Kick misses. Henry tries the World’s Strongest Slam but Sheamus counters and the Brogue Kick sends Henry to the floor. He’s out cold and dead weight now. Naturally since Sheamus is a face now he goes after him and is rammed back first into the post and then through the barricade which explodes. It’s a countout win by Henry at 9:20.

Rating: C. Well it’s Sheamus vs. Mark Henry. What were you expecting here other than power vs. power? This could probably lead to a gimmick match down the line which I wouldn’t be opposed to seeing. They backed themselves into a corner with the booking here though and it was pretty obvious that they weren’t going to do a clean ending here, which is understandable.

Christian is in the back with a big smile on his face. He has an insurance policy and the entire WWE is the beneficiary. Anything goes and we’re in LA, which means the match is going to be like a summer blockbuster like Harry Potter. Well that’s better than a Buff Blockbuster I guess. Oh Christian is Potter while Orton is Cowboys and Alience. I haven’t seen that yet so I can’t make a joke there.

Ad for some movie.

Time to kill off any momentum we had built up in the first 45 minutes with a performance by Cee Lo Green. Since one song wasn’t enough, here’s another with some dancing Divas. Well we’ve just lost 5 minutes of my life.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Eve and Nattie are here as seconds. Kelly looking good in the tiny white shorts and Beth in the blue skirt thing. Kelly uses speed to take over and does her gymnastics stuff. I can’t complain about an upskirt shot of Beth. Kelly dives off the middle rope to the floor. That looked decent. Beth remembers that she’s Beth Phoenix and she’s fighting Kelly Kelly so she gets a gorilla hot shot for two. Booker and Jerry as for a wardrobe malfunction. Off to a chinlock as Cole says he’s turned off by Kelly over some photoshopping thing.

Beth hooks an over the shoulder backbreaker but Kelly escapes into a neckbreaker for two. Kelly gets put in the Tree of Woe but escapes via gymnastics. This is kind of stop and go match. Kelly gets all fired up and slams Beth’s head into the mat a few times to come back. She looks spent though. Handspring elbow is caught into the Glam Slam and Kelly rolls through for the pin at 6:20. Yes, that just happened totally clean.

Rating: C+. Given what I was expecting, this was a miracle. It’s nothing great or anything but they tried out there. It’s pretty easily Kelly’s best match ever and that’s not covering a lot but they worked hard and it came off pretty well. I totally don’t get the ending but the plastic chick going over in Hollywood makes sense.

Stephanie comes out of Cena’s locker room.

Jimmy freaking Hart of all people is with R-Truth and says he needs a manager. Truth realizes something: JIMMY IS LITTLE! HE’S LITTLE JIMMY!!! Truth scares him off and talks about the conspiracy, yelling at Ron Artest and his daughter who are just chilling in the back for no apparent reason.

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Mat stuff to start with Barrett in control. Booker talks about Bryan having his lunch today. We had breakfast talk on Friday and now this? Jerry calls Barrett a carnivore which is a decent enough line. SICK looking arm hold into a pin attempt by Bryan. Cole is way off tonight, calling Barrett the submission specialist and thinking Bryan was the carnivore Jerry was talking about.

Cross body gets two for Bryan. There’s a dragon screw legwhip which has Dusty Rhodes freaking out I’m sure. Running dropkick in the corner gets two and it’s surfboard time. Here come the kicks as Bryan channels his inner Rockette. Barrett gets a shot in and takes over again. This has been a match of varying streaks which is usually a formula for good stuff.

Barrett gets a slingshot (thing Blanchard) backbreaker for two and it’s off to a chinlock. The British dude keeps expanding his arsenal with a flying forearm for two. Oh and Bryan has a much shorter haircut now. Barrett gets sent to the floor with a dropkick and a running knee square to the head. That looked SICK. Back inside now and the pumphandle slam is countered into more kicks. Bryan is speeding things up and taking over now.

HARD kicks to the chest but Barrett won’t go down. Ok a big one to the head puts him down. I think he kicked the British out of him. Now Barrett takes over again and loads up Wasteland but Bryan elbows out of it and throws on the guillotine. That doesn’t work and it’s off to the LeBell Lock but Barrett makes the rope. I thought that was the end. This is getting some time too. They go up to the corner and Bryan gets crotched. Barrett gets a middle rope lariat to the crotched Bryan and now he loads Wasteland, which is enough for the clean pin at 11:45.

Rating: B. Match of the night here by far and it was good stuff. They went back and forth hard here and it let both guys showcase themselves really well. Bryan losing here is ok because he didn’t look bad at all. You can lose and not look bad and this is a great example of that. Good match here and I was way into it near the end.

The California National Guard is here.

We recap Christian vs. Orton. Basically Christian played up Orton’s anger management and got him to snap long enough to lose the title at Money in the Bank. Tonight it’s no holds barred. And remember Christian has promised a surprise insurance policy.

The champ comes out first which is odd. He has a mic and says he’s a man of his words. The insurance policy…..IS EDGE???? His haircut is a little weird but he looks about the same. A bit skinnier though which is expected. If I didn’t have to hit the gym every day I certainly wouldn’t.

Edge says that he’ll never be able to wrestle again but he was happy when he left because he was able to pass the torch to Christian. He thought the first defense against Orton was unfair but then Christian started complaining a lot. Christian did win the title back but he did it by disqualification. Edge did a lot of weak things but he did it with style and was never boring.

He didn’t hide behind suits and clipboards. No Edge you hid behind Vickie. Somewhere along the lines Christian became a disgrace to himself. Christian knows he’s better than that but now he’s just a whiner. With that, Edge leaves to a nice ovation. And heeeeeeeeere’s Randy!

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

No holds barred remember. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. Opening slugout is won by Orton and he hammers the Canadian down in the corner. Christian gets that reverse guillotine thing of his and a jumping back elbow (love that move) gets two. Back body drop sets up the Garvin Stomp and a knee drop for two. They have a ton of time here.

The psychology is working here because they’ve had like 5 matches beforehand to get each others’ moves down, meaning the counters make a lot more sense. Elevated DDT is blocked into a backdrop to the floor. Orton loads up the table but the RKO is counter. Christian grabs the belt and heads into the crowd. The GM computer is there but it hasn’t been used in weeks.

Orton catches him in the crowd and hammers away. Back to ringside now and Christian finds a kendo stick to pound on Orton. He chokes away and shouts a lot and gets two. Christian charges at him in the corner and gets rolled up into a VERY close two count. Spinebuster gets two for the champion. Orton fires off a dropkick to block a kendo stick shot from the middle rope.

Randy is bleeding from the mouth a bit. He starts his finishing sequence and there’s the powerslam. Now he’s got the stick but Christian gets his feet up to break that up. Middle rope dropkick is countered into a jackknife cover for two for Randy. Thesz Press takes Christian down but Christian counters into the Killswitch. That is countered into the backbreaker for two.

Orton grabs some tables from under the ring but Christian spears him into the railing. Cole recaps the show in case someone is flipping through the PPV channels and wants to see if they’re watching the right show they bought I suppose. There’s a table set up at ringside and one in the ring not set up. Orton superplexes Christian onto the unset table but might have hut his tailbone. It only gets two anyway.

The table is already broken but Orton puts it in the corner anyway. Yes slap a cracked table with some of the legs already broken. Nothing could go wrong with that idea. Christian counters the toss into it and hits the reverse DDT. He loads up the spear but Orton jumps over him. RKO is countered and we go back to the floor. Christian goes into the steps and does a nice flip over them.

Now Christian puts Orton’s head into the steps so Randy is going to take a little nap now. Edge’s former brother but now his best friend for life because kayfabe is more powerful than blood drills him with the monitor and I think he says RKO. Christian tries an RKO but Randy has fought the Undertaker a few times so he counters into the RKO of his own and both guys are down.

The fans say this is awesome and they’re getting there. Back in the ring and Orton tries another RKO but Christian counters into the Killswitch for a LONG two. The fans thought it was over. The Spanish announcers are trying to get back on the air which is a funny visual. Christian has a chair now and make it a pair of them. It’s Conchairto time but Christian spits on Orton and takes FOREVER, allowing Orton to get up and crack Christian with the chair. The Canadian goes to the apron and a running shot to the head sends Christian through the table.

Orton still isn’t done as he throws everything he’s got under the ring. There are steps, kendo sticks, garbage cans and the table that is still up in the corner. Christian is on the steps trying to get a breather. Orton puts his foot on the champ’s head and tries a stomp but Christian moves. Powerslam puts Christian through the very end of the table, meaning the rest of it is still standing.

Now it’s stick time and Christian’s back takes a shot. The stick is already bent after two shots. There’s an elevated DDT onto the can. It feels like they’re just killing time for some reason. Orton goes into RKO mode onto the steps but Christian finds a kendo stick from somewhere. He tries to go off the ropes but jumps into an RKO on the steps, giving Orton his 9th world title at 24:36.

Rating: B+. Definitely a good match but they’ve had a better one, probably at Over the Limit. The beating was really good and the ending was SICK. Christian was defeated here and that’s what he needed to have done. They’ll probably have one more blowoff match, hopefully in the Cell which is where this feud could go. After that one though, I don’t know if there’s a point. Still though, very good match that didn’t feel like it was 25 minutes, which is a good thing.

Video about Axxeess while they clear out the ring. There’s a lot of anti-bullying stuff there too. There are some uh….celebrities here I guess they’re called.

Stephanie is talking to HHH but we can’t hear what’s being said.

We recap Punk vs. Cena in the same video we’ve seen three or four times already. I think you get the idea of this already.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

HHH is guest referee and it’s champion vs. champion. This show has been very good so far but if this match is as good as it could be, it hits great. Cult of Personality is a sweet song. We go way old school with a weapons check. Punk is far more popular than Cena. Feeling out process to start. The jean shorts are officially classic. The dueling chants begin and it’s totally domianted by Cena Sucks.

The feeling out process continues and John takes Punk to the mat almost in an amateur style. Now the fans think someone can’t wrestle. This has nearly 40 minutes if need be so they can build very slowly. Cena grabs a chinlock but Punk grabs one of his own including a body vice. Booker is complaining about the technical stuff. Release fisherman’s suplex gets two for John.

We’re seven minutes into this and there hasn’t been anything big yet. Then again it’s not even 10:30 so it’s not like they have to get going immediately. Punk in control and he drops a headbutt and it’s back to the bodyvice. HHH has been pretty inconsequential so far. Cena tries the STF but Punk kicks him off. The crowd is all over Cena tonight. Dropkick knocks Cena off the apron.

Back inside and Punk gets in some kicks to the ribs. There’s an Earthquake for two. Cena fights up but gets caught with a running knee to the head with him against the ropes. He falls onto the mat and fights up into You Can’t See Me. Cena tries the STF but Punk counters into the hold called the Anaconda Vice (Koji Clutch) which is countered into a modified STF. Cole sounds bored out of his mind on the hold.

Punk counters into the real Anaconda Vice (called a keylock) but Cena counters into a Crossface (called a front facelock or something) but Punk gets a rope. Suicide dive takes both guys out. HHH starts the count and both guys are down at 9. Thankfully he stops the count and goes to get them, drawing a round of applause. He throws both guys back in and says let’s go.

Both guys get up and it’s time for the slugout. Cena grabs an AA attempt but Punk escapes, only to get taken down by a SWEET dropkick. There’s the Shuffle but the AA is countered into a sunset flip which is countered into a jackknife cover which is countered into a backslide which is countered into a bridge and a kick to the head for two. AWESOME sequence!

GTS is countered and Cena hits a corner splash. Sitout powerslam gets two as this is getting awesome very quickly. Punk breaks up the top rope Fameasser with a running knee to the head (very popular move anymore) and a bulldog gets two. Punk tries the springboard clothesline but Cena counters into the STF but Punk grabs a rope. The fans are into it but they’re waiting on the HHH stuff I think.

AA is countered into the GTS which is countered into the AA for two. Cena complains to HHH but HHH says it was two. Cena goes up and gets HUGE air on the Fameasser but misses, crashing into the mat and possibly hurting his leg. GTS gets two and Punk is stunned. Punk goes up but is very tired. With a point to the air he drops an elbow for two. That made me smile. Punk’s face is great as he’s shocked.

There’s a Randy Savage chant which is the right idea. Cena grabs a rollup for two and Cena is all fired up. He punches away but Punk grabs a kick to the ribs and another knee to the head. GTS (hit the arm) gets three but Cena’s foot is on the rope. Chant with me: DUSTY FINISH! The pin went down at 24:30.

Rating: A+. It’s not as good as MITB but to call this less than a perfect grade would be unfair. They beat the tar out of each other and had some incredible chemistry as always. These two just have it and there’s no way to teach that. It worked perfectly and the whole thing was great. Cena was all over the place here, trying to prove how well he could work and that’s what he did here. Great match but great in a different way than last month, which is a good thing.

Punk is all happy post match but won’t shake HHH’s hand. HHH holds the arm up and leaves. Of all people KEVIN NASH is in the ring and beats up Punk, leaving him laying with a Jackknife. IT’S ALBERTO!!!

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Running enziguri and Del Rio is champion!!!!!!! He celebrates and we’re done. WOW.

Overall Rating: A+. I liked it better than MITB I think and that’s saying a whole lot. There isn’t a single bad match on the whole card as even the Divas were impressive. Great show here with a great pair of main events to end it. This has been an AWESOME summer and a lot of it has been spearheaded by Punk and hopefully it’s not going to end. The ending is great as we have questions, a great match and a new champion. Definitely worth seeing and it’s great for different reasons than MITB, which is a great sign. Great show and the best two show streak for WWE in years.

 

Results

Rey Mysterio/John Morrison/Kofi Kingston b. Alberto Del Rio/R-Truth/The Miz – Top Rope Splash to R-Truth

Mark Henry b. Sheamus via countout

Kelly Kelly b. Beth Phoenix – Victory Roll

Wade Barrett b. Daniel Bryan – Wasteland

Randy Orton b. Christian – RKO onto the steps

CM Punk b. John Cena – GTS

Alberto Del Rio b. CM Punk – Running enziguri

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 10, 2006: Something About The Wrestlemania Build

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 10, 2006
Location: Mobile Civic Center, Mobile, Alabama
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re running out of time before Wrestlemania and this time around that means we need to start setting up some Money in the Bank participants. Other than that we are all but guaranteed to get some fallout from last week when Mark Henry attacked the Undertaker to cost him the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap

We open with a recap of Undertaker vs. Angle, set to Deadly Game, at least on the Network. Then Henry crushed Undertaker to make it even worse.

Here are Mark Henry and Daivari to get things going. Fans have been calling it a classic, but how can you have a classic without Henry? He is the only man who deserves to be champion because he took out Batista and Undertaker and Angle is scared of him. Now he wants his title shot, so he is calling Kurt Angle out. So Kurt has options: he can hand it over, or get it took.

Cue Angle to say he’s ready right now and the fight is on. This brings out Randy Orton to jump Angle, which brings out Rey Mysterio for the failed save attempt. Henry crushes Rey but Angle makes the save with a chair. Teddy Long comes out to make the main event in obvious fashion.

Money in the Banks Qualifying Match: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Or not as they start brawling in the aisle before the bell. The referee tries to break it up and gets shoved down, drawing out more referees to break it up. Lashley shrugs off a shillelagh shot to the head and gets in a spear until they brawl to the back. No match.

They fight into the parking lot and wind up on top of a car with Lashley ramming him head first into the roof over and over. With Finlay still on top of the car, Lashley (and some editing tricks) turn the car over, possibly onto Finlay.

Someone is coming, and his name is the Miz.

Here is JBL, fresh off hand surgery, for a chat. He has been blessed by the outpouring of support from the fans and he loves them too. However, since his injury, he has been cheapshotted and blindsided by none other than Steve Austin. Last week, Austin was interviewed by WWE.com and mentioned the greatest Texas wrestlers and JBL was not mentioned!

JBL lists his resume, which includes holding the WWE Title longer than Austin. His last Wrestlemania was bigger than anything Austin ever did and JBL is better than Austin on Austin’s best day. All Austin has left is his ability to drink beer, so JBL wants to prove that he is better than that too. That’s why he wants Austin in a beer drinking contest at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Then he’ll go to Wrestlemania and take care of Chris Benoit. We see a clip of Benoit injuring JBL’s hand, and JBL says he better go on last at Wrestlemania, because no one is following him. As usual, JBL is great at talking and possibly even better at taking a beating for what he said.

Gregory Helms, who broke his nose in Australia, comes in to see Teddy Long. Teddy doesn’t think it’s fair that Helms has to defend the Cruiserweight Title every week. Helms agrees, but gets to face Chris Benoit in a non-title match.

Video on the Australia/New Zealand tour.

William Regal vs. Paul Burchill

Burchill is making his pirate debut and Regal is shaking his head about having to do this. Before the match, Regal declares this a joke because Burchill is going to make a bloody fool out of himself. Burchill swings in on a rope and Regal finds it oh so funny. Then Burchill whips out a sword and Regal’s face is great. They fight over wrist control to start with Burchill taking him down into an armbar. Regal throws him away and hits a knee to the face, followed by even more knees to keep Burchill down.

We get an inverted full nelson (that’s a…well rare one at least) for a bit, followed by an exploder suplex for two on Burchill. An elbow gets Burchill out of trouble and it’s a jumping clothesline to take Regal down. A very badly hidden camera edit (Regal went from down on the mat to on his feet in a split second) takes us to Burchill getting two off an enziguri and grabbing a standing Spanish Fly for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m a sucker for pirate movies but this isn’t going to be anything more than a short term gimmick and I think everyone knows it. The change is understandable as Regal and Burchill were only going to go so far as the evil British tag team, but the pirate gimmick going off of the success of Pirates of the Caribbean feels like something that belongs in Memphis, not WWE. At least Burchill is a talented guy though, as this could be a lot worse.

Here are a nervous Booker T. and Sharmell for a chat. Sharmell, with a bag wrapped around her shoulder, says they are tired of the treatment Booker has been receiving. This has been due to Teddy Long and the Boogeyman and they have LETTERS to prove it. First up is a letter from the head of the NAACP, who says Boogeyman is a bad role model for minority children and is rolling back all of the gains in the Civil Rights Movement.

Then someone from PETA says that Boogeyman is cruel to worms, who have feelings too. A third letter, from the editor of Worm Digest, says that Boogeyman should be stopped. Fourth up is a letter from the President’s Council on Health and Fitness, which says eating worms is unhealthy!

So Long needs to get out here right now and address the Boogeyman problem. Long pops up on screen instead and makes Boogeyman vs. Booker for Saturday Night’s Main Event. Booker isn’t happy and throws out the letters….but finds worms instead. Boogeyman appears in the aisle and chases Booker and Sharmell off. The letters thing was kind of funny actually.

Raw Rebound.

Sherri Martel Hall of Fame video.

Kristal Marshall vs. Jillian Hall

Bra and panties match, which is exactly how you follow up a video honoring a woman in wrestling. Jillian throws her down by the hair to start but Kristal is back with a crossbody. The catfight is on with Kristal losing her shirt but coming back with a sunset flip to get rid of Jillian’s skirt. Jillian can’t hit a slam and Kristal takes the shirt to win.

And yes Kristal follows tradition by stripping as well.

Batista was at the Arnold Classic and met Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Chris Benoit vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title. Helms hides in the ropes to start before going with the lockup. Benoit grabs the bad nose and chops away, followed by the snap suplex. The Sharpshooter is blocked and Helms gets in a drop toehold, setting up a legdrop to the back of the neck. We hit the chinlock for a bit until Benoit sweeps the leg but still can’t get the Sharpshooter.

The chinlock goes on for the second time but this time Benoit is up with the release German suplex. Benoit finally gets smart enough to go after the bad nose and NOW the Sharpshooter worse. Helms makes the rope and tries to leave but the rest of the cruiserweights are there to throw him inside. Another German suplex sets up the Swan Dive into the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: C. Benoit winning was expected, but Cole saying that Helms winning would be a huge upset doesn’t exactly do much for the title. It would be an upset, but a champion beating another champion shouldn’t be the biggest shock in the world. It shows you just how worthless the Cruiserweight Title is, even if that has been obvious for a long time now.

Video on Candice Michelle’s Playboy shoot.

We look back at Animal turning on Matt Hardy last week.

Animal talks about his years with Hawk as part of the Legion of Doom. They were the biggest tag team ever and then last week, Matt told him to go up for the Doomsday Device. Well now the tag team days are over and it’s time for Animal to look out for #1.

We look back at the Lashley vs. Finlay fight. Next week, they’re having a lumberjack match.

Mark Henry/Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio/Kurt Angle

Daivari is here with the villains. Angle and Orton start things off with Orton not seeming thrilled to go after him. Kurt drives him into the corner for a clean break before wrestling Orton down to the mat with ease. It’s off to Rey in a hurry and the EDDIE chants begin just as fast. It’s too early for a 619 though as Henry pulls Orton out of the way and we take a break.

Back with Mysterio hammering away at Orton and going up top, where Daivari distracts him for a second. Orton dropkicks him out of the air so Henry can come in to throw Mysterio around. It’s back to Orton for the forearms to the chest as Angle is getting anxious on the apron. The fast tags continue with Orton getting in a few shots before handing it back to Henry. Rey’s kicks to the face have no effect as Henry gorilla press drops him but misses the splash.

The diving tag brings in Angle to clean house and, after avoiding the RKO, he grabs the ankle lock. Henry makes the save so it’s Rey springboarding back in and hitting the 619 on Orton. Angle and Orton fight on the floor as Henry stands on Mysterio. The referee gets splashed on purpose and Daivari sends in a table. Henry loads Mysterio onto it and goes to the middle rope with Angle making the save. The RKO drops Angle and Orton puts him on the table instead. Henry’s splash crushes Angle so here are more referees to check on him as the match was thrown out somewhere in there.

Rating: C. Pretty run of the mill main event style tag match here and it worked well enough in that regard. The whole point was to keep Henry looking like a monster and having him destroy the World Champion is a good way to get there. In addition you have Angle banged up for Wrestlemania, but just get to the Undertaker stuff already.

Henry and Daivari are left alone in the ring and there go the lights. Undertaker’s voice comes up to challenge Henry for a Wrestlemania casket match. Henry rubs his face and nods to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a show that was about setting up things for Wrestlemania, with most of the matches already set or fairly obvious. That worked out well enough too, as the stuff that needed to get a focus got some attention, with a big match being made. Much like last week though, it is very obvious who has something going for Wrestlemania and who doesn’t, as the interest goes up and down throughout the night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – February 17, 2006: Last Chance To Get Out

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: February 17, 2006
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for No Way Out, which is looking like one of the best shows that WWE has put together for a good while now. I’m not sure what to expect here, but we’re going to be seeing some previews for some of the pay per view matches. For once, that sounds like a fine idea. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio vs. Sylvan

Sylvan talks about being the whole package, so Rey hits him with a baseball slide and a slingshot dive to start things off in a hurry. Rey hammers away on the floor and sends him into the steps as the aggression is strong here. They head inside for the opening bell so the aggressive Rey grabs a headlock.

Rey kicks at the leg as the EDDIE chants start up, meaning it’s an Eddie dance. A missed charge in the corner lets Sylvan get in a backbreaker and a delayed belly to back gets two. The bearhug goes on, followed by a spinebuster for two more. Rey fights out of a waistlock and is immediately clotheslined right back down. That doesn’t seem to matter though as it’s a 619 into Dropping The Dime for the pin on Sylvan.

Rating: C-. It was nice to see Rey a little more aggressive as he can be fast enough to make it work well. You can only do the stick and move offense for so long and Rey getting in a win like this, even one where he had to fight through some adversity, was a nice change of pace. Rey is often presented as surviving instead of winning decisively, so this worked out well.

Post match Randy Orton comes out to say that Eddie main evented Wrestlemania (not exactly) but Rey will never do that because he can’t win.

Post break, Mysterio runs into Kurt Angle, who asks if Rey is letting Orton talk to him like that. It would be an honor to face Mysterio at Wrestlemania but here’s Mark Henry to ask why Angle is worried about Wrestlemania. Tonight, Henry is taking out Angle and Undertaker.

Here’s Orlando Jordan to say that he should be getting the US Title shot at No Way Out. No one in that locker room can beat him either.

Boogeyman vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan jumps him but Boogeyman finishes with the pumphandle slam in less than a minute.

Post match, Boogeyman drops worms on Jordan. Moving on.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Hotty is challenging in place of Kid Kash, who had a family emergency. Helms stomps away in the corner to start but Scotty snaps off some hiptosses for two. A missed charge sends Scotty into the post though and a knee to the face gets two. Helms drops some legs and gets two more off a Chris Jericho style cocky cover. A clothesline sets up the chinlock but Scotty is up with elbows and a backdrop. The Worm tease takes too long though and it’s a clothesline into the Shining Wizard to retain.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here and that was kind of the point. The cruiserweights don’t have much going at the moment so Helms is about as good of a choice as they have. They’re going to need to do something else to boost things up, starting with a good challenger. I’m not sure how likely that is given the history of the division, but what we’re getting so far isn’t quite promising.

Post match Helms says he can do that against anyone in the cruiserweight division. Cue the cruiserweight division to beat the heck out of Helms, capped of by the Worm from Scotty.

Video on the Undertaker.

We look at the Helms beatdown again.

Teddy Long comes in to see Helms as he is getting ice on his ribs. For No Way Out: another Cruiserweight Open.

Mr. Kennedy interrupts Paul Burchill’s interview and can’t believe we’re seeing this. Burchill puts a sword to Kennedy’s throat and Kennedy suddenly sees the brilliance. Kennedy: “We need a pirate in this business.”

John Bradshaw Layfield/Finlay vs. Chris Benoit/Bobby Lashley

Booker T. and Sharmell are on commentary and Benoit’s entrance makes Booker sweat. Benoit and Finlay start things off and fight over a lockup until Finlay takes him down by the leg. Back up and Benoit hits a dropkick as Booker rants about being able to work 365 days a year. Sharmell: “Michael Cole, you would scream like a girl if you had an ingrown toenail.” Finlay gets Benoit tied in the ring skirt so JBL can stomp on Benoit’s hand on the steps.

Said hand is bent around the turnbuckle so Benoit uses the good hand to chop JBL into the corner. Unfortunately it’s the Finlay corner and the beating is on all over again. Benoit slugs away from JBL and brings Lashley in to clean house. The shoulders in the corner have JBL in trouble so he goes to the eye to save himself. Finlay comes in and gets clotheslined to the floor, with JBL diving off the apron to drop Lashley.

We take a break and come back with Lashley caught in a sleeper. Lashley fights up but Finlay kicks him in the back to take care of the comeback bid. Finlay comes in and uppercuts him a few times, only to have Lashley hit the running clothesline. The hot tag brings in Benoit to clean house, including a suplex to JBL. The rolling German suplexes keep JBL in trouble but Finlay makes the save. Benoit sends Finlay into the steps but Booker chairs Benoit in the back. The Clothesline From JBL finishes Benoit.

Rating: C+. Pretty solid enough tag match and that works out well for everyone. Finlay doesn’t have the big win on his own yet but he’s become a player in a hurry. Now as long as they can do something with him in the coming weeks, he might be able to become someone around here. He comes off as someone different, and that’s a great status to have.

Bret Hart Hall of Fame announcement.

Matt Hardy vs. Simon Dean

The Gymini are here with Dean and offer a rather early distraction. The other pulls Dean out of the way of a charge in the corner and that means an ejection. Dean gets in a few cheap shots and sends Hardy into the corner as commentary doesn’t seem to think the match deserves that much attention. The Side Effect gets Matt out of trouble and the Twist of Fate finishes in a hurry.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what it means that this is the best Matt has gotten to look since Survivor Series. The match was nothing and just a win over Simon Dean of all people, but at least Matt got to win something. He needs to reset things a bit and while I don’t believe that is going to start from this, it’s better than nothing.

Video on Angle’s career, including several clips of his amateur career.

Raw Rebound.

Matt Hardy runs into Melina in the back and accepts her offer. Not the backscratching offer, but the offer for a match against MNM with a partner of his choosing. Ok then.

No Way Out rundown.

MNM/Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle/Undertaker

Daivari and Melina are here with the villains. Angle and Mercury start things off but Undertaker steps in front of Kurt to start instead. Undertaker throws Mercury into the corner without much trouble and demands Henry. That’s just what he gets, along with a blind tag from Angle who uppercuts Henry instead. It’s off to Nitro, who misses a charge into the corner. The ankle lock is broken up and everything breaks down in a hurry. Undertaker and Angle clear the ring but stop to stare at each other, allowing Henry to throw both of them outside.

We take a break and come back with Nitro holding Angle in a chinlock before Mercury comes in for shoulders in the corner. Henry fights out of an ankle lock without much trouble and it’s Mercury back in with the next chinlock. That one is broken up with a suplex and the hot tag brings in Undertaker. Snake Eyes into the big boot hits Mercury but Henry breaks up the double chokeslam. MNM chokes away in the corner and a double suplex gets two. Undertaker avoids a Henry charge and calls for the chokeslam but Angle tags the hand instead. Angle cleans house in a hurry and finishes Nitro with an ankle lock.

Rating: C+. Normally I wouldn’t be thrilled with the Tag Team Champions losing like this but due to a mixture of that ship sailing a long time ago and it being against Undertaker and Angle. This was all designed to keep pushing Angle vs. Undertaker, which is somehow looking even better than it did before. The match wasn’t the point here, but it worked out well enough for what they were trying to do.

Post match Undertaker chokeslams and Tombstones Henry (without the best landing) to scare Angle a bit. The staredown ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was good enough but what matters the most here is making No Way Out look more interesting. The card is looking rather good two days before the show and that is more than you usually get out of the February show. Then again, having Undertaker vs. Angle on the show is about as good as you can get for a pre-Wrestlemania main event.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – February 10, 2006: One More Week

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: February 10, 2006
Location: Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Attendance: 4,542
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re getting closer Eddie Guerrero to No Way Out and that means Kurt Eddie Guerrero Angle vs. Undertaker, plus Eddie Guerrero Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton over the Eddie Guerrero memory of Eddie Guerrero. That might sound like a good Eddie Guerrero top to the card but they’re going to need more Eddie Guerrero matches to make the show work in the Eddie Guerrero end. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Randy Orton insulting the memory of Eddie Guerrero to convince Rey Mysterio to put up his Wrestlemania title shot. In defense of Eddie Guerrero’s legacy of course.

Opening sequence.

Matt Hardy vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

One fall to a finish and the winner gets Booker T. (on commentary with Sharmell while Jillian Hall is at ringside) for the US Title at No Way Out. It’s a brawl to start with Matt and JBL being sent outside but coming back in so JBL can clothesline Matt back to the floor. Benoit can’t Sharpshooter JBL but he can Crossface him with Jordan coming back in for the save. Matt suplexes Jordan for two as Cole and Booker argue over how much Booker has been wrestling as of late.

JBL pulls Matt to the floor and sends him face first into the steps. Back in and Benoit snaps off a release German suplex to JBL. That doesn’t seem to have much effect as JBL is back up to boot Matt in the face, followed by Benoit DDTing Jordan. JBL gets sent into the steps by Jordan and Benoit, who send Matt into the steps as well. Back in and Benoit hits a top rope superplex to Jordan and we take a break.

We come back with JBL breaking up a Crossface on Jordan as Booker complains about sweating so much. A middle rope elbow gives JBL two on Benoit and Matt’s neckbreaker gets the same on JBL. Booker rants on Benoit being a prima donna for making the save and then complains about the refereeing over and over. JBL suplexes Benoit as Booker is losing his mind about Benoit not being pinned.

The Clothesline From JBL hits Hardy but Jordan has to be dispatched, allowing Benoit to make the save. The Three Amigos take JBL down and the rolling German suplexes drop Jordan again. There’s the Swanton for two on Jordan with JBL making a save this time. JBL is sent to the floor and Matt hits the Side Effect on Jordan. Benoit is back up though and the Crossface makes Matt tap for the title shot.

Rating: B-. They kept the action moving here and Booker’s panicked reactions made the match a little bit better. Then again there was Jordan doing his best warm body who happens to be in there performance, yet somehow not being the one to take the fall. Why do you have Jordan in there if he isn’t the one taking the loss? Can this guy please just get released already?

As Benoit celebrates, Teddy Long tells Booker and Sharmell that it’s either fight at No Way Out or forfeit.

JBL rants about how he can beat anyone when Bobby Lashley comes up. The challenge is on for No Way Out and Jillian accepts on JBL’s behalf, much to JBL’s fear.

Melina offers Matt Hardy a spot in MNM.

Daivari is sick of hearing about Kurt Angle and is looking forward to seeing Mark Henry destroy Undertaker tonight. Henry promises to take Undertaker out.

Here’s MNM for an Open Challenge.

MNM vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Non-title. London wristlocks Mercury down and drops a leg on the arm but Mercury is back up with a right hand to the face. A hurricanrana gives London two more as Melina is looking rather confident on the floor. Nitro comes in and gets hurricanranaed by Kendrick, followed by a dropkick for two. A clothesline to the back of the head staggers Kendrick though and it’s back to Mercury, who gets dropkicked by London.

The threat of a kick to the face sends Mercury outside and that means another headscissors from Kendrick. London adds a big flip dive onto both of them but Kendrick gets backdropped over the top and outside for a nasty crash. Back in and Kendrick gets sent hard into the corner but he fights out of the backbreaker. The diving tag brings in London but the referee doesn’t see it, allowing MNM to hit a Snapshot, with Melina grabbing London’s leg so there’s no save.

Rating: C-. London and Kendrick could be a good addition to the tag team division. I mean, assuming there actually is a division, as there isn’t much to the whole thing aside from MNM and….do Heidenreich/Animal still count? The FBI is still around but other than that, we more or less have the champions and whomever is challenging them at the moment. In other words, business as usual.

Video on the Asian tour.

Randy Orton wants to set the record straight on his Eddie Guerrero comments last week. After seeing the “Eddie isn’t up there” comments again, here’s Orton in the arena to address said comments….and he’s in the low rider. Orton doesn’t know where Eddie is and doesn’t care. All that matters is that Orton got what he wanted: a chance to take Mysterio’s Wrestlemania title shot.

Orton is going on to Wrestlemania to become champion, but that’s at Wrestlemania. Why is he here in a low rider this week? See, Eddie Guerrero was no saint, and Orton has the proof. He pulls out a copy of Eddie’s own book to read a section but here’s Rey Mysterio to jump him. Mysterio dropkicks him head first into the post and Orton is out.

Cruiserweight Title: Nunzio vs. Gregory Helms

Helms is defending. They go to the mat to start and here’s Kid Kash, who gets the winner next week, to watch from the aisle. Nunzio grabs an armbar and hurricanranas him out to the floor but Helms is back with something like an F5 to send Nunzio throat first across the top rope. A high crossbody (to the face) drops Nunzio again and we hit the chinlock. Nunzio fights up with some clotheslines and a neckbreaker gets two. Helms is right back with a fireman’s carry spun into a knee to the face, followed by the Shining Wizard to retain.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. There isn’t much that you can do with these matches as there is little interest in them as the cruiserweights have been treated like nothing for a long time now. The action was fine enough (save for that high crossbody) but at the end of the day, it’s the Cruiserweight Title. WWE isn’t going to treat it as anything important and it’s hard to get behind it as a result.

Palmer Cannon is glad the juniors are back. Mr. Kennedy comes in and likes them, but Pirate Paul Burchill breaks through a wall, says hello, and leaves.

Octagoncito/Pequeno Valencia vs. Mascarita Sagrada/Tzuki

Valencia is nearly Rey Mysterio’s size so Sagrada picks up the pace to start and takes him down early on. The much bigger Valencia misses a running dropkick in the corner and it’s Tzuki coming in to spin around into a headscissors. Octagoncito comes in but Tzuki is too busy armdragging Valencia….but here’s Finlay to beat up Octagoncito for the DQ.

Post match Finlay beats up Tzuki for a bonus. Finlay says this is serious and he’s here to fight. I’m all for him in something like this. The juniors are all talented, but it doesn’t fit in here and having Finlay beat them up is going to get more mileage than anything they do.

Raw Rebound.

Video on Undertaker.

No Way Out rundown, which is looking pretty good.

Booker T. and Sharmell are leaving but the trunk of their car is full of worms.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Daivari is here with Henry. Undertaker grabs a headlock to start, which looks rather out of place for him. A running shoulder has no effect on Henry so he grabs his own headlock. Henry’s shoulder works a bit better and he hiptosses Undertaker down with ease. Henry charges into a boot in the corner but a collision sends Undertaker into the ropes. The running charge misses though and Henry falls outside as we take a break.

Back with Henry hammering away against the barricade. Undertaker reverses a whip though and sends Henry hard into the steps. Some right hands and a big boot rock Henry and the elbow to the face sets up the apron legdrop. A glare at Daivari means it’s a delayed two on Henry, who isn’t knocked down off Old School. Henry catches a charge in the corner though and powers Undertaker into the other corner.

A headbutt to the spine gives Henry two and it’s time to crash down onto Undertaker’s lower back. Henry stands on the ribs and Daivari gets in some choking as the referee yells. They head outside again with Undertaker’s back being sent into the barricade and the apron. That’s good for one back inside but Undertaker slugs away from his knees and hits the running clotheslines in the corner. The chokeslam (and a decent one at that) connects but MNM come in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. I was into this one until the ending, but that was the right call. You don’t want either of these two losing at the moment, as Undertaker is going into a World Title shot and Henry just lost at the Rumble. MNM’s loose association with Henry is enough for them to come in here and it was the right ending to a nice power match.

Post match Undertaker shrugs off MNM and chokeslams Daivari but MNM are back up. Henry runs Undertaker over but Kurt Angle runs out for the suplexes to make the save. Henry runs through Angle, only to have Undertaker kick Henry in the face. Undertaker grabs the title, so here’s Teddy Long to make Henry/MNM vs. Angle/Undertaker in a handicap match for next week. Henry is pleased to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a tricky one as it wasn’t much on its own, but it was quite the show for setting up No Way Out. They’ve got a hot card for the show and Angle vs. Undertaker sounds awesome. If they can keep that up next week, we could be in for something special at the pay per view. Cut out some of the weaker stuff (Booker vs. worms, juniors and the rather lame cruiserweights) and you’ve got an excellent show. As it is, it wasn’t much here but it looked to the future, which is a good thing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – February 3, 2006: The Adult Version

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: February 3, 2006
Location: TD Waterhouse Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and on our way to Wrestlemania, but first up we need a stopover at No Way Out, which seems like it is going to feature Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle. That is a heck of a main event on its own, but Smackdown will also have Rey Mysterio as the Royal Rumble winner on the show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We look at Kurt Angle defeating Mark Henry (thanks to a lot of cheating) to retain the World Title on Sunday, with Undertaker coming out to say he wanted the title and destroy the ring to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Teddy Long to talk about the surprises from the Royal Rumble. This included Undertaker saying he wanted Kurt Angle so the title match is on at No Way Out. How nice to see them just getting to the point and not wasting time for a change. The biggest surprise though was the winner of the Royal Rumble, as Rey Mysterio dedicated his win to Eddie Guerrero and now he’s going to Wrestlemania.

Cue Rey (who Cole says won the Rumble last night) in a low rider and wearing an Eddie shirt as the fans chant for Eddie. Teddy leaves and Rey thanks Eddie, who got him last night. Cue Randy Orton to interrupt though, who says Eddie was laughing at Rey last night. Randy and Eddie know that Rey isn’t ready to headline Wrestlemania and there must have been divine intervention last night. He knows Rey couldn’t beat him in a regular wrestling match, but the fans cut him off with a YOU SUCK chant. Rey: “I’m glad I’m not the only person who thinks you suck.”

Orton wants to challenge Rey for the Wrestlemania title shot so Rey looks up to Eddie. Randy: “Eddie’s not up there. Eddie’s down there….in h***.” The fight is on and referees have to pull Rey off of Orton. This is the point where the Eddie stuff jumped to a new level of ridiculous, as the story has stopped being about anything but Eddie. There needs to be more to it than that for a Wrestlemania World Title match.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Mexicools

MNM is defending and has Melina with them. Psicosis monkey flips Nitro down to start and it’s a moonsault/legdrop combination for two with Mercury having to make a save. The champs bail to the floor and Crazy hits a big running flip dive to take them both down. We take a break and come back with Mercury suplexing Psicosis for two. Melina adds a headscissors choke from the apron and Tazz sees nothing wrong with that.

Psicosis fights out of a double arm crank but it’s a double spinebuster to put him back down for three near falls in a row. That’s enough to draw Melina to the apron for some yelling but Mercury is sent into her, meaning the ankle injury flares up again. Back in and Psicosis gets over for the hot tag to Crazy for the house cleaning. A tornado DDT gets two on Mercury but Melina takes off her boot to knock Crazy silly and retain the titles.

Rating: C. I know the Mexicools aren’t likely to go anywhere but they’re fine for the smaller, high flying tag team. There is always a place for a team like them and they did rather well here. The champs were in trouble until their manager cheated to retain their titles. That’s as by the book as you can get but they did it well enough to get by with a somewhat hot match.

Booker T. and Sharmell tell Teddy that he still can’t wrestle after his injury was aggravated in the Royal Rumble. Teddy says Booker can pick a substitute to face Chris Benoit tonight, but that substitute can lose the US Title for him. Yelling ensues.

Raw Rebound.

Here is JBL complaining about how he has to be put in the ring with one freak show after another. Anyone who gets in the ring with him becomes a star but he’s tired of WWE depending on him to give people a rub. No more, because he is a wrestling god, but here’s Bobby Lashley to interrupt for his match.

Bobby Lashley vs. Chad Dick

JBL is still at ringside, along with James Dick. Chad’s early cheap shots don’t work as Lashley throws him down, then does the same thing to James. The Dominator finishes Chad in less than a minute.

Post match, Lashley gets blasted by the Clothesline From JBL.

We see the same Angle/Undertaker video that opened the show.

Here’s the Undertaker for a chat. Undertaker says the time is drawing near for Kurt Angle and there is no way out. Angle has the title that he wants so here’s Angle to interrupt. Kurt says Undertaker makes people scream but he makes them tap. Undertaker is the Phenom, but he’s the wrestling machine. When the bell rings, Angle doesn’t have a soul either, so at No Way Out, he isn’t wrestling in peace. Undertaker knows Angle believes that, but he will rest in peace at No Way Out. Thunder strikes and Undertaker disappears.

Wrestlemania is 58 days away.

Octagoncito vs. Tzuki

Yes the Juniors are back and they have their own graphic. Octagoncito jumps him to start but gets dropkicked to the floor for a flip dive. Back in and Octagoncito hits a dropkick into a gorilla press as commentary argues about how to pronounce the names. Tzuki comes back with an armdrag and a tilt-a-whirl headscissors, followed by a sunset flip for two. A high crossbody into a crucifix gives Tzuki the win. These guys were gone for months and now they’re back, though I can’t imagine they’ll make any bigger of an impact than they did before.

Mr. Kennedy interrupts Chris Benoit’s warmup and hints that he knows Booker’s replacement opponent. Benoit threatens to break his arm for getting this close again.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. ???

Benoit is challenging and the mystery replacement is….Finlay. This could be interesting. Booker joins commentary as Finlay takes Benoit down for an elbow to the face. A keylock sends Benoit over to the rope as Booker goes over he and Benoit’s history with Finlay in WCW. Finlay forearms him down again and we hit the armbar. Benoit gets him into the corner for some quick stomping but Finlay uppercuts him back.

Some chops send Finlay into the corner again so it’s another uppercut to drop Benoit again. We hit the reverse chinlock but Benoit is back up with the rolling German suplexes. Booker’s distraction breaks up the Swan Dive though and Finlay gets in a cheap shot. That just earns him the Crossface but Sharmell comes in with Booker’s crutch for the DQ.

Rating: C. I could go for more of Finlay getting into the title picture as he’s rather good at what he does. The Booker vs. Benoit stuff is interesting as well as they have had a bunch of matches already but the injury has allowed their feud to continue without getting stale. I’m starting to get into this situation and that’s always a good thing to see, especially if Finlay is going to be a regular part of it.

Post match the double beatdown is on.

Daivari doesn’t agree with the idea that Kurt Angle defeated Mark Henry because it was the steel chair that beat him.

The Boogeyman scares Booker and Sharmell. Please tell me that’s not going to be about the title.

Gregory Helms says he is the greatest cruiserweight alive today and he knows that no one on Smackdown is going to give him a threat. Nunzio comes up and threatens to break Helms’ leg. The title match is set for next week.

Palmer Cannon agrees that Paul Burchill and William Regal don’t want to be a tag team anymore. See, Regal’s heritage is British, but Burchill’s is from PIRATES. He wants to swashbuckle on Smackdown and Cannon loves it. Regal’s eyes bugging out at all of this makes it that much better.

Randy Orton/Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio/Kurt Angle

Daivari is here with the villains. We’re joined in progress with Orton saying he wants Rey to start. That’s what Orton gets so Rey comes in and hammers away until Orton sends him face first into the middle buckle. A headscissors puts Orton the floor though, just like on Sunday, with Rey following with a springboard seated senton.

Back in and Orton takes Rey into the corner so Henry can come in to step on Rey’s face. Orton drops a knee to the chest and hammers at Rey as the fans want Angle. A dropkick cuts off Rey’s comeback attempt but Orton goes shoulder first into the post. The diving tag brings in Angle, who slaps the ankle lock on Henry. That’s broken up in a hurry so it’s an Angle Slam right back into the ankle lock.

Orton makes the save so Angle goes for his ankle, only to have Daivari’s distraction allow a low blow to break things up. Orton knees Angle in the ribs and it’s back to Henry to headbutt him into the corner. Angle is sent outside for a whip into the steps but he’s right back in for an uppercut off with Orton. It’s Orton getting the better of things though and the chinlock goes on.

That’s broken up so Angle can hit a German suplex and it’s back to Rey for a springboard seated senton. The sitout bulldog lets Rey hammer on Orton until a heck of a clothesline takes him down. The Eddie chants bring Rey back up for the 619 on Orton but Henry breaks up a springboard. Everything breaks down and Angle chases an interfering Daivari through the crowd. Henry follows them, leaving Orton to counter a hurricanrana into a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nice main event tag match here that advanced Orton vs. Rey, with the other two guys being there as well. Orton and Mysterio can do their thing at No Way Out and this was a good way of setting them up for that match. They followed the formula for the most part here and Orton winning clean advanced the story they’re setting up. Pretty nice job all around.

Post match Orton says Rey has as much chance of winning the title at Wrestlemania as Eddie has at coming back to live. Rey accepts the challenge on behalf of Eddie to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the wrestling for the most part but e pluribus gads the Eddie stuff is going to be an incredibly rough sit. That’s the biggest story on the show right now and I’m almost scared to see how bad it is going to get. It isn’t a great thing to focus on and it’s rather uncomfortable at times on top of that, but WWE has never been one for tact. The wrestling was good but the stories were hard to take, making this about as vintage of a WWE show as you can get.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 27, 2006: Hurry Up

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 27, 2006
Location: Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means we should be in for very little of note, as most of the card is already set. The Rumble itself hasn’t gotten that much attention, but it’s not like the match is going to need that much help. Other than that, we’ll be seeing more from Mark Henry and Kurt Angle, which could be a good thing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle, with Daivari being revealed as Henry’s new manager.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry

Before the match, we see a clip of Rey dedicating his Royal Rumble to Eddie Guerrero. Daivari is on commentary as Rey hammers on Henry to start. Some dropkicks to the leg earn Rey a clothesline but Henry misses a sitdown splash. Henry is right back up and knocks him to the floor before dropping him onto the mat with a gorilla press. The splash doesn’t warrant a cover so he throws Rey outside to start the stalking.

Rey avoids a shot to the steps though and takes Mark back inside for some sliding dropkicks to the head. A moonsault gets one and Rey snaps him throat first across the top. There’s the 619 into the springboard seated senton, but Henry throws him off. Rey gets back up and charges into the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin.

Rating: C. This was the classic big man vs. little man formula and it was fine again. Henry is at his best when someone is bouncing off of him and he stands there to do power stuff. They were smart enough to not try anything too complicated here and in a situation like this, that was easily the best choice.

Matt Hardy is ready to win the Royal Rumble because he will not die.

Booker T. comes in to see Randy Orton before his match with Chris Benoit tonight. Orton is ready to win the Royal Rumble and Booker seems ready to return to the ring. They’re good for now, but Orton might be ready to take Booker up on that favor sooner or later.

Video on the Mexico tour.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Mexicools vs. FBI vs. The Dicks

The winners get the final two Smackdown spots and we’re joined in progress after a break with Vito powering James up and bringing in Nunzio. The Mexicools low bridge Nunzio to the floor though and it’s Crazy coming in to clean house. James has to save Chad but Nunzio tags himself in to drag Psicosis into the corner. The double stomping sets up Vito’s camel clutch on Psicosis and it’s right back to Nunzio for an armbar. That’s broken up in a hurry and Psicosis gets over to Crazy to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and a wheelbarrow slam/X Factor combination gives Psicosis the pin on Nunzio.

Rating: C-. They got in and out here fairly quickly and that is the best thing that they could have done. There was no need to do anything else here and at least they let the best choice win. The Dicks have gone nowhere since debuting and I can’t imagine that was ever in doubt. Finally you have the FBI, who are a fine midcard team and nothing more than that.

Classic Rumble moment: Chris Benoit wins.

Randy Orton vs. Chris Benoit

No holds barred. They lock up to start and Benoit grabs a to wristlock, with Orton reversing into a headlock. Orton is smart enough to grab the rope before a German suplex and bails to the floor as we take a break. Back with Orton rolling away from the threat of a Crossface and uppercutting him outside. Orton sends him into various things and gets two on the floor, even though falls counting anywhere wasn’t mentioned at the beginning.

Back in and Orton grabs the chinlock before snapping off the dropkick to put Benoit on the floor again. The trashcan is pulled out but a drop toehold sends Orton into it face first instead. Benoit starts chopping away to put Orton onto the announcers’ table, where a thumb to the eye gets Orton out of trouble. Back in and Orton hits a rather aggressive chinlock but Benoit fights up for a failed Sharpshooter attempt.

A knee drop gives Orton two and it’s right back to the chinlock. This time it’s a northern lights suplex to get Benoit out and they head outside again. The chop off goes to Benoit and it’s back inside for Three Amigos to Orton. Benoit keeps it up with a top rope superplex and they’re both down. Orton rolls outside to pick up the trashcan and gets in a heck of a shot to Benoit’s head as we take a break.

Back with Orton holding ANOTHER chinlock, followed by the over the back neckbreaker. Orton takes him outside and peels the mat back, with Benoit backdropping him onto the concrete. They head inside again for the rolling German suplexes but the Swan Dive hits trashcan lid. Benoit isn’t having that so he blocks the RKO, smashes the trashcan lid over Orton’s head and Crossfaces him for the win.

Rating: B. Good brawl here and I liked that it was more about the two of them beating each other up instead of using weapons all the time. There were a few weapons shot here including the ending, but it wasn’t the focal point of the match and that’s a good way to go. Orton does need to lighten up on the chinlocks though, because we’ve covered those extensively enough.

Animal wants to win the Royal Rumble because it’s all he has left to accomplish.

Finlay vs. Funaki

Finlay knocks him down to start and kicks Funaki in the head. Funaki’s enziguri looks to set up the tornado DDT but Finlay throws him down but the yet to be named Celtic Cross (White Noise) finishes Funaki in a hurry.

Post match Finlay keeps up the beating so the referee reverses the decision. Finlay does not approve of this and doesn’t like Americans. He isn’t going away so get over it.

JBL tries to convince Jillian Hall that the Boogeyman is scared of him. Hall is having nightmares about the Boogeyman eating her beauty mark. She asks if JBL ever noticed it and JBL’s eyes panic in a funny bit.

Bobby Lashley is going to win the Rumble.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

After looking under the ring for the Boogeyman, JBL sends Scotty into the corner but gets knocked down. The Worm is cut off by the Clothesline From JBL and here’s the Boogeyman…or at least his music. Scotty is gone and the worms (sounds like a secret alliance to me) fall from the ceiling, covering half of the mat. Now the Boogeyman pops up to scare JBL into the worms. JBL runs off as Boogeyman eats a bunch of worms, as usual.

Raw Rebound.

Melina shows Teddy her taped up ankle and says he has done nothing about this. That’s strike two and he is officially on notice.

Daivari and Mark Henry say Angle loses on Sunday.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Kurt Angle vs. MNM

Non-title and Melina is here with MNM. We’re joined in progress with Mercury getting headlocked down and then taken down with ease. A shoulder puts Mercury on the floor so Nitro comes in instead. Angle armbars him without much trouble and then hammers away in the corner. A Melina distraction lets Nitro get in a knee and Mercury low bridges Angle to the floor.

Nitro pulls Mercury out of the way of a charging Angle to send him shoulder first into the post and there’s a running knee in the corner. The Snapshot is broken up with Mercury being sent outside, where Melina slips him something. Melina offers a distraction so Mercury can get in a loaded right hand for two. The Angle Slam drops Mercury and a suplex sends Nitro to the floor. Angle grabs Mercury’s ankle for the tap.

Rating: C. Match was fine but they really needed Angle to survive cheating and make one of the champs tap? They couldn’t have had some kind of shenanigan or had Henry come in for the DQ? Anyway, Angle has looked awesome as of late and they’ve done a great job of turning him face in a hurry, though it isn’t exactly hard to cheer the guy.

Post match here’s Henry, who is Angle Slammed in a hurry. The ankle lock is broken up with raw power and Angle is stunned to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They did a little more for the Rumble itself but this was the Angle vs. Henry show. That isn’t the kind of match that should work on paper but the build they gave it here worked out pretty well. Benoit vs. Orton was a good, long match but it’s the only other thing of value on the whole show. Then again, with the Rumble on Sunday, everything is cranked up for Wrestlemania, meaning this is the most inconsequential show of the season.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6