Monday Night Raw
Date: July 8, 2013
Location: 1^st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is a pretty stacked show tonight. First and foremost, THEY’RE HERE! Tonight is the debut of the Wyatt Family who have been sending creepy messages to the company for months now. Other than that we have the job performance evaluation of Vickie Guerrero, meaning all of the bosses of the company will be in one place at the same time. Let’s get to it.

We open with a Wyatt Family vignette, saying we’re coming.

Opening sequence.

Vickie and Brad are in the ring with a ladder and a referee to open the show. She talks about how important the ladder has been to the WWE’s history with people like Shawn Michaels, Razor Ramon and HHH. To her it represents her climbing up the corporate ladder over her career. If she falls, she’s holding the fans responsible. Vickie goes up top of the ladder and compares WWE to companies like IBM and GE. She’s done everything on her own for years and has done her best to entertain the people. From the top of the ladder to the bottom of her heart, everything she’s done has been for the people.

Jerry Lawler of all people cuts her off and says EXCUSE ME? Lawler has received word that in preparation of the job evaluation tonight, the McMahons and HHH are taking in all factors, including the WWE Universe. There’s a poll on the WWE App where you can give her a pass or fail grade as managing supervisor.

Vickie says she considers the WWE Universe like her family, meaning they have good and bad days. At the end of the day though, they’ll have her back right? What sounds like Vince’s voice is heard saying “Please don’t fall Vickie.” but it sounded like something we weren’t supposed to hear. Tonight it’s Cena vs. Henry face to face, along with Christian vs. Kane, Punk vs. Orton and Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan. Dang this is a packed show. Sheamus vs. Bryan is RIGHT NOW.

Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Sheamus grabs a headlock to start before taking Bryan down with a shoulder block. They hit the ropes with Bryan nipping up and knocking Sheamus down with a clothesline for two. Bryan fires off the kicks to the chest but Sheamus comes back with the Irish Curse for two. They fall out to the floor with Bryan trying the running knee to the face but being caught in mid air and dropped into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Bryan backflipping over Sheamus in the corner but charging into another Irish Curse for two. A back elbow gets two more for Sheamus and the rolling senton puts Bryan down again. The Brogue Kick misses though and Sheamus tumbles to the floor, setting up the FLYING GOAT to put both guys down again. Back in and the missile dropkick gets two for Bryan but he kicks Sheamus to the apron, allowing Sheamus to hit the ten forearms.

Sheamus gets crotched while loading up the top rope shoulder but blocks a top rope hurricanrana, allowing him to hit the shoulder for two. Bryan avoids a charge in the corner and hits a big kick to Sheamus’ head for two, but the following Swan Dive misses and both guys are down. Back up and Bryan fires off more kicks followed by a crucifix for two. Bryan tries to transition into the NO Lock but Sheamus counters into the Cloverleaf, which Bryan counters into a small package for the pin at 14:10.

Rating: B. This right here is a great example of why I hated the Sandow feud. Sheamus can have some AWESOME matches when he isn’t toying with someone five levels below him. Bryan’s rocket push continues as Sheamus is someone that almost never loses a match anywhere. When’s the last time he was pinned clean? December against Big Show I believe? Great match here.

They shake hands post match.

WWE has sent someone to the bayou to find the Wyatt Family compound.

AJ tells Langston to be worried about Kaitlyn but Langston laughs it off. Ziggler pops in and wants to talk to her in private. He wants to know why she’s never out there for his matches anymore and is following Kaitlyn for some reason. AJ says she’ll do anything to be the power couple they’re destined to be but Ziggler doesn’t seem sure. AJ seems to offer sex but Ziggler wants the world title instead. Everything seems ok though.

We get the same career retrospective on Mark Henry that we got last week.

We look at RVD vs. Eddie Guerrero from Raw in 2002.

Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns vs. Tons of Funk

Brodus slams Rollins down to start before bringing in Tensai for a double chop. A delayed butterfly suplex gets two on Rollins before it’s back to Brodus who misses a cross body. Off to Reigns who takes Brodus’ head off with a clothesline for two. We get a McGuire Twins reference from JBL (they were a tag team who weighed a combined 1500lbs or so) as Reigns puts on a chinlock.

Roman pounds on Brodus as the match continues to go longer than it should. Reigns tries a Samoan Drop but Brodus slips down the back into a rollup for two. Brodus hits a belly to back suplex to escape and makes the tag off to Tensai. The bald one cleans house and hits the rolling senton in the corner followed by the Baldo Bomb for two on Rollins. Seth ducks under a charge and Rollins spears Tensai down for the pin at 6:35.

Rating: D+. This started very slow but the hot tag to Tensai picked things way up. The JBL commentary with old references was very entertaining but it went over the heads of most of the fans which is a shame. Other than that though there wasn’t much of note here, as there was no way Shield was losing six days before a title defense.

The reporter has found Wyatt Family members Luke Harper and Erick Rowan (the guy in the mask) and seems to be kidnapped by Harper.

Here’s Cena for the showdown with Henry. He sucks up to the crowd by saying it sounds like Money in the Bank is tonight. Cena is here to face Mark Henry but there’s no Henry. Cue the big guy who says that he’s starving for something. Cena makes a Snickers joke but Henry says he’s not going to respond to something like that. Instead he’s going to chill because he’s a different man now.

He’s known who Cena is for years and he’s a puppet. That title will validate Henry’s career and will make him a first ballot Hall of Famer. He’d sell out his mama to have that title. Cena says Henry better win on Sunday then because he sees a desperate man in Henry. If Henry doesn’t win it, he loses everyone’s respect and seventeen years will have been wasted. Henry cracks up because he doesn’t care what the people think. People love Cena or they hate him but Henry doesn’t care.

There are lines that Cena won’t cross because of who he is, but Cena takes the hat and shirt off and draws a line with his foot. Henry says not for free, because he’ll get Cena on Sunday, but then he takes his shirt off anyway. Mark goes towards Cena but stops and says he’ll see Cena Sunday. Henry charges again and runs over Cena but John tries an AA. The weight is too much though and he lands on the champ’s head, knocking him out. Henry picks him up and hits the World’s Strongest Slam before posing with the title.

Orton says he’ll win the MITB contract on Sunday and would have no problem cashing in on Cena if he was laid out like he was moments ago.

Miz is on commentary for the next match.

Curtis Axel vs. Chris Jericho

Non title here. Heyman has sunglasses due to a bad black eye at the hands of Alberto Del Rio on Smackdown. Axel says that Jericho wears a jacket with Christmas lights on it but neither he nor Miz is standing in the way of perfection. Jericho quickly dropkicks him to the floor and hits a baseball slide to take the champion down. Back in and Axel kicks Jericho down as we take a break.

Back with Jericho fighting back but not being able to hook the Walls. A northern lights suplex gets two for Chris and a high cross body gets the same. Axel comes back with a swinging neckbreaker for two but Jericho bulldogs him down and gets two off the Lionsault. The Codebreaker is countered into a PerfectPlex for a VERY close two as Heyman is beside himself.

Jericho hooks the Walls (BIG pop for that) but Axel quickly makes it to the rope. Axel is knocked off the apron and into the announce table, drawing Miz to his feet. Heyman gets his client back inside before the countout but he walks into the Codebreaker for the pin at 10:14, his first loss as a Heyman Guy.

Rating: C+. Good match here and at least the ending wasn’t clean. I don’t like having the champion lose here after the bad luck the champions have had over the previous few months but that’s life in the WWE anymore. The match was good though and having Axel rub elbows with top level guys is going to do nothing but good for him.

We look at RVD winning the IC Title on Raw from Christian in 2003.

Sandow keeps cutting Rhodes off from talking about MITB. Colter, Cesaro and Swagger come in to say the country is in trouble. They don’t seem pleased with Sandow but Colter says the son of an American Dream should know better. Barrett comes in and says he’s winning but Colter says Barrett doesn’t speak English. Fandango comes in but everyone cuts off the catchphraase in a funny bit. He goes to say it anyway so Barrett drops him with a Bull Hammer.

Back to the Bayou where Harper takes the cameraman inside, telling him not to stray. The compound is very dark but we find Bray Wyatt himself, who says he’s been waiting for us. Creepy stuff man.

Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio

The colored lights are back which don’t fit for a match with the World Heavyweight Champion involved. Del Rio takes him into the corner to start but misses a charge, allowing Cara to get two off a kick to the face. Cara goes up but gets caught with a running enziguri for two. Del Rio hits another running enziguri in the corner for two more and it’s off to an armbar by the champion.

Cue Ziggler (and the regular lighting) and Cara gets two off a rollup. Ziggy says that he’s sorry for what he did to Ricardo but he’s going to introduce Del Rio the way he should be introduced. The match keeps going as Ziggler makes small genitals jokes. Cara gets two off a slingshot senton but walks into a German suplex. A LOUD superkick puts Cara down but Del Rio finally goes after Ziggler for the brawl. Sin Cara hits a big dive to take Alberto out as the match ends at about 5:00.

Rating: D+. Most of that is for how loud Del Rio’s kicks were. I don’t see why they couldn’t have Del Rio get the win here as it’s not like Sin Cara is doing anything right now. Ziggler is still lacking that big moment to solidify his face turn but he’s getting closer. The announcing wasn’t funny but then again most things in WWE aren’t anymore.

It’s time for the job evaluation. The trio of judges sit in front of Vickie as she pleads her case for why she should stay. She talks about getting rid of crazy AJ and takes credit for RVD, Rock and Undertaker all returning. Stephanie says Vickie had nothing to do with those returns so Vickie talks about Brock, before apologizing for Lesnar attacking Vince and HHH.

Vince stands up and says bringing Lesnar back was a genius move. He believes that Vickie is highly entertaining but she’s made some boneheaded decisions in the name of good entertainment. HHH says Vickie can be unintentionally entertaining but she’s terrible at her job. For instance a few weeks ago she was promoting the WWE video game but the people were booing her out of the building. Vince might think it’s entertaining, but Vince’s thoughts on entertainment aren’t all that modern. “It’s why the Golden Girls aren’t on TV anymore.”

HHH sucks up to the fans and says they want and deserve better than Vickie Guerrero. He does give her one point: she has the most annoying voice in the history of broadcast television. Vince praises her for breaking through the male dominated glass ceiling and thinks she should be permanent GM. HHH speaks up again and says the whole point of this is Vince is going to do what he wants, including putting a spineless puppet like Vickie in power.

HHH says Stephanie should get to decide Vickie’s fate and Vince agrees. Both guys suck up to her (“Daddy’s little girl!” “The mother of my children and the woman that has to go home for me after this.”) but Stephanie says the answer will be decided by the WWE App vote. The results say Vickie failed by a margin of 75% to 25%, meaning Vickie is fired. Vickie rants about how you can’t trust the people and how she’s not a spineless puppet. Stephanie fires her and Vickie goes into evil mode.

She falls to her face and screams a lot as the fans chant NO MORE VICKIE. Vickie crawls onto the table and shouts that the McMahons need her in charge. Vince stays in the ring and asks the people if they’re happy. He blames the fans for failing and throwing away the most entertaining GM in Raw history. We need a new GM and that will be…..Brad Maddox. Oh joy. Maddox is shocked and stands still in the ring as Vince helps Vickie out.

Post break Vickie is crying and Vince says he’ll make it right somehow. Maddox comes up and thanks Vince for the opportunity but Vince won’t shake his hand. Vince asks Brad how long he’ll hold his hand out for but Vickie goes after Brad and says get out of his life. The new GM runs off. Vince: “You ruined my jacket!”

Kane vs. Christian

Kane shoves Christian around to start and hits a hard whip into the corner. The Canadian escapes a powerslam and snaps Kane’s neck over the top rope. A middle rope dropkick gets two as the commentators rattle off MITB stats. They head to the floor for a big dive off the top from Christian as we take a break. Back with Christian hitting a tornado DDT out of the corner for two. An uppercut puts Christian down but the top rope clothesline misses. Christian charges into the chokeslam out of nowhere for the pin at 7:42.

Rating: D+. Screw the reason because THEY’RE HERE.

Wyatt pops up on the screen and says that he has brothers, not followers. It’s time for the people to stand up and realize what’s going on. He’s seen it all in his dreams his thoughts and he understands that this is the end instead of the beginning. He lights a lantern and says we’re here before blowing the light out.

Back in the arena the lights are out and the Family’s music starts playing. Wyatt walks out with a lantern and sits down in what is presumably his rocking chair. The lights come up and Harper/Rowan (not yet named) are attacking Kane. They’re big guys who can look Kane in the eye and pound him down. They get him to the floor and send him into the steps before crushing Kane’s head between the steel. Wyatt gets in Kane’s face and says what sounded like down with the machine. The fans chant Husky Harris because they have to think they’re smart.

Vickie carries out her box of stuff but runs into Ryback. He puts the box on the floor and hugs her, saying it’s going to be ok.

The Bellas are on commentary for the next match.

AJ Lee/Alicia Fox vs. Kaitlyn/Layla

Layla starts by throwing kicks at Alicia as the Bellas insult AJ. A quick rollup gets two for Layla as the Bellas basically bury the entire Divas division. Kaitlyn goes after AJ and they head to the floor where Kaitlyn hits a SWEET spear to knock AJ out cold. The match is stopped at about 2:00.

Punk wants to know if he’s best in the world because he held the title for 434 days or did he hold the title for 434 days because he’s the best in the world.

Randy Orton vs. CM Punk

Feeling out process to start as the fans are split down the middle. Orton runs him over with a shoulder block and a sweet dropkick takes Punk down. Punk comes back with a suplex for two as the dueling chants begin again. The Elevated DDT is countered by a kick to the head to send Orton to the floor. The suicide dive takes Orton down again as we take a break.

Back with Orton holding a chinlock and taking Punk down with a t-bone suplex before he can make a comeback. We hit the chinlock again but Punk fights up and hits a quick dropkick to put Orton down. Orton comes back with his clotheslines but Punk avoids the powerslam and gets two off a rollup. A neckbreaker puts Randy down again and there’s the running knee in the corner. The Macho Elbow connects for no cover but it’s GTS time. Orton shoves Punk through the ropes for the Elevated DDT but can’t follow up with a cover.

Orton loads up the RKO but Punk blocks, only to be caught in the snap powerslam for two. Punk escapes ten punches in the corner and hits another running knee to the chest but Orton escapes the GTS. The RKO is blocked by a high kick to the head and it’s a GTS for the clean pin at 13:41.

Rating: B-. Another good match to close out the show here with Punk looking strong. Orton doesn’t lose a thing by getting pinned here as it’s all about climbing on Sunday. This was your usual battle of the superstars formula and it worked as well as you would have expected it to. These two always have solid chemistry together.

Post match Bryan runs out and beats up Punk before hitting Orton with a ladder. He climbs up and grabs the case to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. I had a blast with this show tonight and it absolutely flew by. We had good to great matches all night, the AMAZING Wyatt Family debut, a solid build to the PPV on Sunday, that wicked spear from Kaitlyn, the reaction from Maddox when he was named GM, the funny Fandango segment and Layla in some of the smallest shorts in recorded history. WWE is on a roll right now and this was one of the best shows they’ve had in a long time. I’m fired up for MITB and I never came close to that for Payback or Extreme Rules.

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Small Package

Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins b. Tons of Funk – Spear to Tensai

Chris Jericho b. Curtis Axel – Codebreaker

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara went to a no contest

Kane b. Christian – Chokeslam

Alicia Fox/AJ Lee vs. Kaitlyn/Layla went to a no contest

CM Punk b. Randy Orton – GTS

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

He officially announced it on Raw. Given all the injuries, I can’t say I blame him.  The fans gave him a very nice reaction and chanted his name.

Edit: scratch that as Henry beat up Cena to set up a future match.

Smackdown
Date: April 19, 2013
Location: Thompson-Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield

Back to the blue team again as we’re starting to set up Extreme Rules. The main stories around here are Ziggler vs. Del Rio vs. Swagger and Henry vs. Sheamus which were both furthered on Raw. We’re still in that limbo period between the aftermath of Wrestlemania and the build to Extreme Rules so it’s kind of hard to guess what’s coming tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Swagger breaking up Alberto’s rematch and then beating the champion on Raw, only to be beaten up by Del Rio seconds later, thereby making everyone look weak at the same time.

Here’s Fandango to open the show. Cole tells us how Fandangoing is taking over the world, continuing to bury the idea into the ground. Fandango hits on Lillian who doesn’t seem repulsed by him. He asks if she’s ever Fandangoed before and that’s too much for her……until he spins her around and dips her back. Apparently she’s terrible though so Fandango drops her to the mat. Fandango asks Lillian to pronounce his name but is interrupted by Santino.

Marella says that Fandango can dance but he’s a very rude person. He liked watching the cheerleaders on Youtube Fandangoing a lot better than he likes watching the real thing. Santino offers to Fandango for us here but introduces us to his dance partner the Cobra. The dance discombobulates Fandango and he gets sent to the floor. The match is after a break.

Santino Marella vs. Fandango

Fandango pounds him down as the announcers tell us about all of the Fandangoing around the world. The fans think Fandango can’t wrestle as he stomps on Santino. Santino tries to nip up but can’t do it so Fandango pounds on him even more. Off to a quick cravate but Santino comes back and gets the nipup this time. The Cobra is countered into a downward spiral for the pin for Fandango at 3:10. Yes make sure to take away the one good looking move he has and replace it with one of the most overused finishers in wrestling.

Rating: D. It really is pitiful how WWE has screwed up ANOTHER hot start for a character. Fandango got hot for a single week, so WWE’s move is for him to not have a match on Raw and then squash a jobber to open Smackdown. That’s fine for most people, but when your first match is against Jericho at Wrestlemania and now you’re doing this two weeks later, it’s a big step down. They should have given him the US Title on Raw or something like that, as it would at least show they’re doing SOMETHING with him, other than telling us how awesome Fandangoing is and killing the concept right out of the gate.

Booker yells as Teddy for making Swagger vs. Ziggler on Monday when Big Show comes in. He thanks Teddy for giving him a partner tonight, unlike Booker who gave him a handicap match. Booker glares at Teddy so he leaves with Big Show.

Kofi Kingston vs. Wade Barrett

Non-title all around. Barrett pounds Kofi down to start but gets caught in a standing rana for two. A dropkick gets the same for Kingston and it’s off to an armbar. Believe it or not, Barrett actually uses his punching background for a few seconds here but Kofi easily fights him off with a kick to the head. Back to the arm for a bit but Barrett knocks him off the top rope.

Wade takes Kofi to the floor and rams Kofi’s face into the announce table. That’s only good for two on Kingston so Wade pounds on the ribs to keep Kofi down. Barrett pulls him off the top again for two and it’s back to the chinlock. That goes nowhere so Wade hits a kind of Samoan Drop, but he covers arrogantly and gets rolled up for the pin at 5:32.

Rating: C. Not bad here but was there NO ONE else that Kofi could have pinned other than the Intercontinental Champion? Were the Prime Time Players off getting dance lessons? Were the 3MB guys trying to get Rhythm and Blues to open for them? Apparently so because we just had to have a champion get pinned here to make KOFI FREAKING KINGSTON look strong as a midcard champion.

We recap Sheamus being attacked by Mark Henry.

Henry says he attacked Sheamus because he can and that’s what he does. Sheamus jumps him for a change.

We recap the world title situation with Del Rio and Swagger both wanting title shots. Del Rio was jumped by Swagger as he tried to get his rematch, so Swagger got the match and pinned Ziggler. It’s a good thing he did too because Ziggler was starting to look credible for a few moments there. A triple threat match has officially been announced for Extreme Rules.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger goes for the bad leg to start but Del Rio goes to Jack’s bad arm to escape. Del Rio stays on the arm and it’s another standoff. Jack takes him down with a quick headlock before going after the bad leg. Swagger tries to wrap it around the post but Del Rio punches his way out of danger. Alberto rams the bad arm into the steps and we head back inside for a hard kick to Swagger’s back for two.

Del Rio misses a charge into the corner though and is backdropped onto the ropes, hurting his leg again in the process. Colter talks trash as Del Rio falls to the floor and we take a break. Back with Albeto fighting out of a leg lock and kicking away at the arm again. Swagger goes right back to the knee for two more and hooks a leg lock on the mat. A crucifix gets two for Del Rio but Swagger kicks him in the face to put both guys down again.

Swagger takes it to the corner again and wraps the leg around the ropes before taking the bandage off the bad knee. Alberto fights up again but misses the running enziguri in the corner. Swagger puts him on the apron but as he goes for Del Rio, Alberto grabs a quick armbar over the ropes. The bad knee saves Swagger again though and it’s time to shout WE THE PEOPLE a lot. Alberto ducks a big boot and comes back with the backbreaker but hurts his own knee in the process.

There are the forearms to the back and a Backstabber for two on Swagger. The armbreaker is broken up once and a second attempt is countered into the Patriot Lock in a nice counter. Alberto gets to the ropes so Swagger immediately hits the Vader Bomb for a close two. Del Rio comes back with the Codebreaker to the arm but the armbreaker is countered with Swagger sending him out to the floor.

They head back inside and a HARD superkick to Swagger gets two as Jack grabs the rope. The Patriot Lock goes on again but Del Rio counters into the armbreaker. Swagger counters into a rollup but Alberto counters THAT into a small package for the pin at 14:32 shown of 18:02. Really good finish.

Rating: A-. That’s likely a bit high but I was WAY into this at the end. If they had done this match at Wrestlemania it would be a match of the night candidate with ease. The arm vs. leg stuff here was great and the submissions both played into the finish. Stupid booking aside, this was really good stuff and I had a great time with it.

We get an abbreviated version of Ryback’s reasoning for attacking Cena and their confrontation and the Shield beating down Cena to end Raw.

Shield says Monday was a moment that Cena won’t forget anytime soon. They claim that Ryback has learned to not mess with the Shield anymore and saw a look on his face. They say the same look on Undertaker’s face a few weeks ago and Undertaker is afraid. Ambrose promises to prove that Undertaker is mortal on Raw.

Great Khali/Natalya/Hornswoggle vs. Epico/Primo/Rosa Mendes

We actually get a reason for this match: Epico/Primo/Rosa stole Horny’s parking spot earlier and there’s video to prove it. I’ve heard worse. I can’t think of anything off the top of my head but I’ve heard worse. Nattie takes Rosa down to start but can’t hook the Sharpshooter. Rosa comes back with a kick to the back and a chinlock but Natalya fights back with a clothesline. Off to Epico and Khali with the giant hitting some hard chops in the corner. Primo tries to help but gets sent into the same corner as Epico for simultaneous chops. Horny annoys Rosa into a chase and Khali hits the Punjabi Plunge to pin Epico at 3:18.

Rating: D. Rosa was basically in half of a swimsuit and a vest so it doesn’t fail based on that alone. That’s about the extent of the good parts of the match though as none of these are people I care to see. At the end of the day they’re fighting over a parking lot, but how many people can’t get on television? Remarkable.

We get most of Punk’s promo from Raw where he walked out.

We get Heyman challenging HHH to fight Brock in a cage match at Extreme Rules.

Mark Henry/Big Show vs. Randy Orton/Sheamus

Henry and Sheamus start and immediately talk trash, but Henry brings in Big Show before there’s any contact. They immediately start brawling and Big Show sends him to the apron for chops to the chest like Sheamus would hit forearms. Sheamus comes back and hits the forearms to take over. Sheamus goes up top for the shoulder but has to jump over Show instead, allowing the giant to hit a superkick to take him down. An elbow drop misses and it’s off to Orton.

The side slam puts Orton down and here’s Henry to continue slowly pounding on Orton. A bearhug has Orton in trouble and it’s back to Big Show to stay on the ribs. The chokeslam is countered into a DDT and both guys are down. Hot tag brings in Sheamus for his running forearms and the top rope shoulder for no cover. White Noise connects but a Henry distraction lets Show spear Sheamus down as we take a break.

Back with Show kneeing Sheamus in the head and getting two off the Final Cut. Henry comes in for a nerve hold before Big Show comes in for the same thing. Sheamus tries to fight up and finally manages a chop block to put Big Show down. Hot tag brings in Orton to pound on Henry and some clotheslines drop the smaller of the two monsters. A DDT gets two but Henry powers out. Show tries to come in but gets caught in the Elevated DDT. Everything breaks down and Show chokeslams Orton for the pin at 13:32 shown of 17:02.

Rating: B. This was the tag team formula to the letter and that’s all you need a lot of the time. I’m a big fan of combining two feuds into one match like this as you can get those stories advanced while also adding in something different. Henry vs. Sheamus is going to be good stuff when we get to it and Orton vs. Big Show might not be bad either. Good main event here.

Overall Rating: B+. This is exactly what Smackdown should be: a wrestling heavy show with long matches and angle advancement. Tonight was incredibly entertaining and blew by which is a good sign. Swagger vs. Del Rio is well worth seeing and the main event is solid stuff too. The rest of the stuff is very hit or miss but when you have an hour and a half of actual TV and about 40 minutes of that is top shelf stuff, you can’t complain that much at all. Very good show.

Results

Fandango b. Santino Marella – Downward Spiral

Kofi Kingston b. Wade Barret – Crucifix

Alberto Del Rio b. Jack Swagger – Small Package

Great Khali/Natalya/Hornswoggle b. Epico/Primo/Rosa Mendes – Punjabi Plunge to Epico

Mark Henry/Big Show b. Randy Orton/Sheamus – Chokeslam to Orton

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 8, 2013
Location: IZOD Center, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the night after Wrestlemania and we have a new world champion here on Raw. Cena pinned Rock after a somewhat lackluster match, giving Cena not only his 14^th world title but his 4^th title win at Mania alone. Other than that, HHH still has a job, Undertaker has still never lost at Wrestlemania, Shield is still undefeated and Del Rio retained the title. Tonight is usually a huge show with a big surprise, so let’s get to it.

Here’s Cena to open the show. We also get a Tweet from Rock saying that he tore his abdominal muscles off the bone during his match last night. Cena says it should be everyone’s dream to win in the main event of Wrestlemania, because you get the adulation, the respect and the cheers (of which he gets very few on all counts). He says the fans have known him for ten years now and it seems they’re angry tonight. Actually Cena is upset too because Wrestlemania is over.

However, it’s the night after Wrestlemania which is when things happen. Last year he got beaten up by Lesnar but he’s still here now. Maybe he’ll do a little dance. Maybe with a kick. Maybe with a little shake. “Maybe even a little heel turn?” Anyway he says he’s the champion and this is what he wants for a Wrestlemania celebration: to defend the WWE Championship. He doesn’t care who it is….and here’s Mark Henry.

Henry gets in Cena’s face and says that he won his match too, just like the champion. The fans chant for Sexual Chocolate so Cena cracks a joke. Henry yells some more about Ryback so Cena cracks more jokes. Cena agrees to defend the title tonight against Henry but here’s Booker T. He says Rock is #1 contender to the WWE Championship (Cena: “Once in a lifetime best two out of three?”) because Rock has a guaranteed rematch. Therefore, if Henry wants a shot, he has to beat Cena in a one on one match tonight. Henry promises to put Cena in the Hall of Pain.

Alberto faces Colter/Swagger in a handicap match tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. Big E. Langston

We get a Tweet from Shield saying that they’re going to do something historic. Langston shoves Bryan down to start and hits a hard running charge into the corner to keep control. A delayed backdrop puts Bryan down and Langston pounds away in the corner. Bryan comes back with a bunch of kicks to the chest and a hard one to the head, but an AJ distraction lets Ziggler crotch Bryan. As Kane goes after Dolph, Big E. throws Daniel over the top and onto Kane for the save. Back inside and the Big Ending gets the pin on Bryan at 2:17. Total squash.

Kurt Warner, former NFL quarterback, hosts a new reality show called The Moment on USA and is at Raw tonight.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett is challenging after losing the title last night on the pre-show. Wade pounds away in the corner to start but Miz comes back with a left hand and a snap suplex for two. Off to a chinlock by the champion as the fans chant for Barrett. Wade escapes but gets caught in a quick sunset flip for two more and it’s back to the chinlock. That’s easily broken up as we now talk about the rugby player Barrett is named after. Wade comes back and sends Miz into the ropes for a neckbreaker to the apron as we take a break.

Back with Barrett getting a near fall off the Winds of Change. Miz rolls to the floor so Wade can drop an elbow off the apron for two. Off to a chinlock on the champion for a bit but Miz fights up and pounds away. A running knee and big boot put Barrett down but they botch the Reality Check (the backbreaker went fine but Wade fell down before the neckbreaker started).

The corner clothesline hits a bit better and Miz’s short DDT gets two. Wasteland is escaped and Miz puts on the Figure Four, only to have Wade make the rope. Barrett comes back with a quick elbow and goes to the middle rope (since nothing has been done to his leg at all so far right?). Miz breaks it up but gets slammed into the top turnbuckle. Barrett hits the Bull Hammer and regains the title at 13:00.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t bad actually but the booking makes less than no sense. This puts Barrett at 1-2 in the last three weeks against Miz, but he walks out with the title anyway. Naturally there’s going to be a third match because that’s how WWE works, but this whole feud (what are they fighting over anyway?) is worthless and done for.

Vickie and Maddox are arguing in the back when Sheamus comes in. He wants Big Show tonight but Brad says Sheamus will owe them one. Sheamus glares him down so Vickie says she’ll give Sheamus a match. She doesn’t say who it’s going to be against though.

Randy Orton comes up to Booker in the back and asks for a match with Big Show tonight. Booker says Sheamus has already gotten that match tonight but Orton says Booker is a GM and a Hall of Famer. This makes Booker overrule Vickie and give Orton the match instead. Great. Now we get battling GMs. Again.

Here are Colter and Swagger with Zeb asking for the fans’ support for their handicap match up next against Del Rio. He wants the fans to chant USA when Del Rio comes out.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Zeb Colter/Jack Swagger

The heels have to tag so Swagger starts things off. The fans want Ziggler. Not much of note to start until Swagger is sent to the floor. Del Rio hits a suicide dive to send Swagger into the announce table and hits a running stomp for good measure. A top rope cross body gets two on Swagger but Zeb gets in a cheap shot, allowing Swagger to take out the world champion’s knee.

The knee is worked on even more until Del Rio fights back and tries for the enziguri in the corner. It misses by six inches but thankfully Swagger doesn’t sell it. They trade some standing switches and there’s the Patriot Lock, but Del Rio rolls out quickly. Del Rio puts the armbreaker on over the top rope until a four count but is knocked into the barricade for good measure as we take a break.

Back with Jack hitting a belly to back suplex for two and cranking on the leg some more. Jack misses a charge into the corner and hits the post, allowing Alberto to make his comeback with some clotheslines and the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. The backbreaker re-injures the champion’s knee though and both guys are down again.

A hard kick to Swagger’s head gets two but the armbreaker is countered into a belly to belly for two. Off to the Patriot Lock again but Alberto makes a rope. The hold goes on for the third time but Alberto pulls him into the armbreaker as he did last night. Jack taps at 11:06. Colter never got into the match.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible but at the same time it’s the same……screw the rating because we’ve got music.

Post match Alberto has his leg looked at and HERE COMES ZIGGLER!

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Dolph Ziggler

The place goes NUTS for Ziggler as he stomps away on the leg and head of Alberto. The Fameasser hits for two but Ziggler misses a splash in the corner. The enziguri in the corner hits for a VERY close two and there’s the armbreaker. Ziggler cranks on the bad knee to break the hold and the Zig Zag gives us a new champion at 2:15.

If that’s not enough, here’s Undertaker. He talks about dedicating the match to Paul Bearer….and here’s Shield. They surround the ring and all get on the apron at the same time. Cue Kane and Bryan for the save before there’s any contact. As usual, Shield runs when the numbers are even.

In the back, Ziggler says he’s going to go show off his new title.

R-Truth/Santino Marella/Zack Ryder vs. 3MB

No entrances for any of these guys in this random tag match. Truth and Heath start things off with Slater being slammed down. Santino comes in, thrusts his pelvis, gets punched once, and bails. Off to Ryder vs. Mahal with Zack getting beaten down on the floor by a cheating McIntyre. Apparently Drew is legal now and hits a big boot to the jaw for no cover.

Off to Slater for some more beating before it’s back to McIntyre for an armbar. A neckbreaker puts Drew down and there’s the hot tag to Santino. He cleans house on Slater with his usual stuff but Mahal breaks up a near fall. Everything breaks down and the Cobra is enough to pin Slater at 3:30.

Rating: D. I have no idea what the point of this was. Were they running short or something and needed to fill in five minutes with something like this? None of the guys have anything going on right now so let’s spend a few minutes on them here to fill in a gap….I guess?

We look at the week in New York/New Jersey to promote Wrestlemania.

Orton and Sheamus argue in the back. Sheamus says he has this and Orton isn’t pleased.

Last night Big Show said he didn’t turn on his partners but rather they turned on him. He tagged himself in and yeah, he saved the team from the TripleBomb. Then later on, Orton stole the tag which should have belonged to him because Orton had to take his thunder. No one is taking Show’s thunder again. That’s not the route he wants to take anymore. The only thing important to him anymore is himself.

Here’s Sheamus to ask who wants to see him face Big Show. He calls out Vickie to make it official but here’s Orton instead. Randy gets in Sheamus’ face and says that Big Show is his tonight. He asks the fans who wants to see him beat up Big Show and the fans seem pretty split. The solution? TWITTER POLL!

Back from a break and Orton wins the poll 77-23. Before the match though, here are Booker and Vickie. Instead of Orton vs. Big Show, it’s Orton vs. Sheamus and the winner gets Big Show. So the poll happened…..why?

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

They shove each other to start and the fans do an OLE chant. Orton hits a snapmare but Sheamus avoids a knee drop. Sheamus hits a pair of knees for his own for two and starts working on the arm. Orton comes back with another knee to the chest as the match keeps going. Randy hooks a chinlock as the fans think a four minutes old match is boring.

Now Sheamus hooks a chinlock as the announcers talk about going to London in a few weeks for Raw. Now the fans chant for Rob Van Dam. Now it’s HBK. Orton slowly stomps away as the match is completely ignored. The fans are now chanting for JBL as Sheamus gets two off the rolling fireman’s carry. Sheamus goes up top and the fans chant for Lawler. This is BIZARRE. Orton dropkicks Sheamus out of the air and now they’re chanting Cole as we take a break.

Back with the fans chanting what sounded like DDP and then ECW as Sheamus makes a comeback. The Irish Curse hits for two as the crowd is doing the Wave. JBL: “I wish Michael would drown in it.” Sheamus hits his knee to the ribs and the ten forearms in the ropes as the fans suddenly start cheering along. A suplex brings Orton back in as Sheamus is smiling. Orton’s backbreaker puts Sheamus as we get a Randy Savage chant. Even the announcers are giving up at this point.

The powerslam and t-bone suplex put Sheamus down as the HBK chant starts again. There’s the Elevated DDT and Orton loads up the RKO, only to be shoved off into White Noise. I think the fans are booing Sheamus but how can you tell in this match? The Brogue Kick misses and here comes Big Show as I think everyone knew was about to happen. He throws Sheamus into the post, presumably ending the match at 15:10. Fans: “Thank you Big Show.”

Rating: N/A. I have almost no idea what happened in this match but the crowd stole the show here. The thing I don’t get is that while the match was slow paced, it wasn’t THAT bad. This is a case where the fans just did not care what was going on and found ways to entertain themselves. I’ve never seen anything like this but it was awesome in a way. For an actual grade, we’ll go roughly C- or so.

Post match Show KO’s Orton and hits a BIG spear on the floor. The fans chant FIRE RANDY as Orton is launched into the announce table. Show picks up the announcers’ chairs and tries to throw them into the ring but only hits the ropes both times. Fans: “ONE MORE TIME!” Show walks away instead.

We recap Shield invading Undertaker’s speech earlier.

Fandango vs. Kofi Kingston

The fans are still hot and it seems to be for Fandango. Fandango dances around Kofi before Kingston sends him into the corner. The fans are HUMMING FANDANGO’S THEME MUSIC. Not that it matters as Jericho runs in for the DQ at 1:30.

Post match Jericho destroys Fandango by whipping into whatever he can find. They head inside and there are the Walls of Jericho for good measure. Referees finally come out to break it up. A Codebreaker leaves Fandango laying. The referee declares Fandango the winner and from his back in agony, Fandango corrects his pronunciation. The crowd basically starts a dance party to Fandango’s music.

Video on Cena’s media appearances today.

We look at HHH getting his arm looked at. He’s fine apparently.

Here’s Heyman (crowd ERUPTS) in the back with something to say. His guys lost last night but it took HHH 23 minutes to beat Lesnar. Shawn and HHH aren’t here because of the beatings they took last night at Lesnar’s hands. Paul says Lesnar is ready for a fight TONIGHT. That isn’t happening though, because Brock doesn’t fight for free. Instead, Heyman wants to talk about Punk who is going to tell the fans how he feels…..next week.

Rhodes Scholars/Bellas vs. Funkadactyls/Tons of Funk

This was scheduled for last night but got bumped for time reasons. We’re joined in progress after a break with Naomi hitting the Rear View on one of the Bellas. Off to Cody but Naomi hits a rana on him anyway. Tensai comes in and launches Cody into the corner before hitting a RUNNING FLIP DIVE into the corner. Cody hits a Disaster Kick to send Tensai into 619 position.

The Bellas smack their hips onto Tensai’s head and the Wind-Up Elbow gets a BIG reaction. The hot tag brings in Brodus for his usual stuff and a kind of slide into a cover gets two. Everything breaks down and Sandow is crushed between the big men. A double splash ends Damien at 2:28.

We look at The Moment again.

John Cena vs. Mark Henry

Non-title here and if Henry wins, he gets a title shot at some point in the future. Cena ducks under Henry and dances a bit. He pounds on Henry but gets run over by a single shot from Mark. The fans are behind Henry of course. Mark pounds on Cena in the corner but misses a splash, allowing Cena to pound away. Henry rolls to the floor as we hear about Rock tearing his abdominal muscle off his pelvis bone in addition to having a hernia.

They go back to the announce table so here’s a chant for the table. Henry loads up the announce table but Cena escapes the World’s Strongest Slam. Mark rams him back first into the post but Cena sends him into the steps and slides back inside for the countout win at 3:29. Seriously that’s it.

Rating: D+. Again what can you expect here? They didn’t have the time to do much here but what we got wasn’t bad. Cena is the kind of guy who could have a good match against Henry if given the time, but again what can you ask for with about two hundred seconds to a match? Nothing to see here.

Post match Henry lays out Cena but Ryback makes the save. Ryback lays out Henry with a Meat Hook…..and turns to look at Cena. The fans chant YES but Ryback pulls Cena to his feet. Cena stares at him and Ryback nods. Cena poses on the ropes and Ryback does FEED ME MORE. Cena looks at Ryback…..AND THERE’S THE MEAT HOOK! Shell Shock to Cena ends the show and we’ve got a heel turn.

Overall Rating: C+. I’ve seen over 40,000 matches and well over 2000 shows. I have NEVER seen anything like this crowd tonight. I’m pretty sure they started because they were bored and then they just took off. As for the show….eh it wasn’t terrible, but the first hour SUCKED. I’m sick of these GM’s having to hold our hands through every match being made and taking up so much time because saying “these two have issues, tonight they fight” is too complex. Anyway, a lot of stuff happened tonight and it’s going to be interesting to see the fallout of it. Good show overall and FAR more interesting than I was expecting.

Results

Big E. Langston b. Daniel Bryan – Big Ending

Wade Barrett b. The Miz – Bull Hammer

Alberto Del Rio b. Jack Swagger/Zeb Colter – Cross Armbreaker to Swagger

Dolph Ziggler b. Alberto Del Rio – Zig Zag

Zack Ryder/Santino Marella/R-Truth b. 3MB – Cobra to Slater

Sheamus b. Randy Orton via DQ when Big Show interfered

Fandango b. Kofi Kingston via DQ when Chris Jericho interfered

John Cena b. Mark Henry via countout

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon at:

Well…….No, but it was after the match.  Henry beat Ryback clean in about eight minutes.  It was basically a squash.  Odd indeed.

At least it isn’t called the Colossal Jostle.There isn’t as much to say about this one.  At the end of the day this is one of those matches that is there to give us a cool visual rather than have a competitive match.  I don’t think it’s any secret that the odds say the match ends with a big old Shell Shock on the big old Henry, and that’s the right call for this match.  It shouldn’t run more than seven minutes tops, as you don’t want to expose either of these guys as being as limited in the ring as they actually are.

Ryback NEEDS this win far more than Henry does.  Mark is old and banged up and likely doesn’t have much more time in the company.  Ryback on the other hand has a good chance of being one of the top stars in the company for a few years to come.  A win over Henry would have meant a lot more a year ago, but here it still means a lot and the Shell Shock can be the signature spot for him for a long time to come.  Big moves like that at Wrestlemania have done a lot for guys in the past, so why not do it again here?

As for the match, if it’s somehow not clear yet, Ryback wins with the Shell Shock.  He definitely needs this match more than Henry, as Ryback hasn’t had a big win since…..before the Cell?  The big question is can he pull the move off without botching it badly?  Henry is another guy like Jericho who can do as many jobs as you ask him to do and he’s still going to be a solid threat because of how big and powerful he is.  He’ll also look good here because Ryback can throw him around like the monster that he is.  These matches can work wonders for someone and I think that’s what’s going to happen for Ryback……assuming he can hit the Shell Shock.

He’s a heel apparently and wants to be in the Chamber.  I can’t say I’m complaining and it’s yet another guy in the Smackdown title picture.  I’m a happy KB over this.

Smackdown
Date: April 27, 2012
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T

It’s the last show before Extreme Rules and we’re minus a Josh Matthews here due to Lesnar killing him on Monday. We have a main event tonight of Sheamus vs. Mark Henry in a non-title match which is a rematch from Raw where Daniel Bryan cheated Sheamus with a fast count. Other than that I don’t think anything else has been announced. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is time, as I want it to be next Friday so I can see Avengers.

We see a clip of Josh’s attack from Monday.

Here’s Bryan to open the show. He talks about cutting the cord and finally getting rid of AJ. He’s out here to set the record straight: the Wrestlemania loss to Sheamus doesn’t count and should go against AJ’s record, not his. Then on Monday he was asked to be guest referee in Sheamus vs. Henry. He said he’d call it right down the middle and he did. Some people are saying he fast counted Sheamus but here’s footage showing he didn’t. The count is shown in slow motion. We also get the post match attack and YES Lock.

Bryan says it’s time for a question and answer session. Did Henry beat Sheamus? YES. Did he make Sheamus tap out? YES (not that I remember). Will he get the title back on Sunday? YES. Cue Del Rio who asks a bunch of questions with Ricardo shouting SI after every one in a funny bit. Big Show comes out and wants to know if it’s YES or SI, which starts a chant. Show knocks Bryan to the floor and chokeslams Ricardo. Good chokeslam too.

Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

This is joined in progress after a break and I’m pretty sure is non-title. Show chops Del Rio in the corner and clubs him down with forearms. Del Rio is knocked to the floor but he drapes the arm over the ropes to take over. Show vs. Cody’s stipulation will be determined by a spin of the wheel. Show shrugs him off and spears him down. He loads up the chokeslam but Cody comes in for the DQ at 1:54.

Cody tries some weapons but Show knocks them away. He steals Cody’s belt and whips Cody with it a few times. Cody hasn’t gotten in a single successful attack or victory over Show at all since Wrestlemania.

Ace and Eve are in the back and he says that Eve can make whatever changes she thinks are good on Smackdown. Just run them by him first. Eve says she doesn’t know any of the crew people so maybe they should make them wear nametags. They run into Teddy who wants to know what his job is. Ace says Teddy reports directly to Eve, who tells him to go get a nametag.

We get a clip from the Divas Title match Monday where Nikki won it from Beth.

Damien Sandow talks about enlightenment. The fans aren’t enlightened as they worship people with nonsensical catchphrases and loud music. He debuts in a week.

Alicia Fox vs. Nikki Bella

Non-title again. The place just goes silent for this as you can hear the girls shouting at each other. Nikki throws Alicia and those hips around with a snapmare and it’s off to a modified chinlock. Alicia comes back with a one footed dropkick and basically falls off the middle rope for a back elbow. Twin Magic lets Brie hit a facejam for the pin at 1:48.

O’Neil and Young come up to Yoshi who I think they’re facing tonight. They make fun of Japanese people that put their hands together and bow while saying hai. They ask about Yoshi’s partner and imply he can’t speak English. Big Zeke comes up and says he’s the partner tonight. They sing a song about how Zeke is big and strong but doesn’t have any cuts. Where were these guys on NXT?

Teddy is now in a maid’s outfit over his suit and has a big nametag on his chest. Aksana comes in and he thanks her for sticking by him. She’s surprised he has grandchildren and here’s Ace who says Aksana’s favor has been granted: Antonio Cesar gets a tryout match tonight. If he wins, he gets a job. Eve had an idea that Aksana should be guest ring announcer. Oh and Teddy will have his own ringside commentary table to make sure we have three commentators and he starts next. Ace will tell him every word he says through a headset.

Ezekiel Jackson/Yoshi Tatsu vs. Darren Young/Titus O’Neil

Teddy is on commentary at a separate table but can’t talk unless Ace gives him the ok and the exact words in his ears. Young and Tatsu start in the corner and Young takes him down with a Hot Shot. Off to Titus as Cole berates Teddy. The heels beat on Tatsu with double teaming and on their own. Young dropkicks the knee out on Jackson while he’s on the apron and a REALLY bad modified Hart Attack out of the corner gets the pin on Yoshi at 1:50. Young missed Tatsu for the most part so it was more like a shove than a chop while Titus powerbombed him.

Here’s Cole in the ring and he brings out Orton for an interview. Cole asks about Orton’s match on Sunday and Orton says he likes to shoot first and ask questions later. He’ll be ready to do whatever it takes to beat Kane on Sunday. We get a video on their feud (long one too, like two minutes) and Orton says he can almost respect what Kane did because it’s something he’d do, but he won’t accept it. On Sunday, there are no rules so he can do whatever he wants. Kane is the devil’s favorite demon, but even the devil couldn’t so what Orton is going to do on Sunda.

Cue….Jinder Mahal? He thinks Orton and Kane will destroy each other and a new breed will emerge. Mahal says he’s better than Orton all around and that he’ll be waiting after Extreme Rules. Orton cuts him off and lays him out with an RKO. Are they really going with Mahal vs. Orton after this? Why? What has Mahal done to make them think he deserves that spot?

Kofi Kingston says don’t try this at home or school.

Tyson Kidd vs. Antonio Cesaro

Kidd doesn’t get an entrance. Cesaro’s music reminds me of Johnny B. Badd’s. Cesaro is of course Claudio Castagnoli. He has what looks like socks wrapped around his thighs. Booker: “Are those kneepads?” Cole: “No Booker. If they were kneepads they would be around his knees.” Cesaro uses a lot of power strikes and a gutwrench suplex to take Kidd over. He throws Kidd in the air and hits a European Uppercut on the way down. Cesaro sets for a cradle piledriver but falls forward ala DDP’s pancake move for the pin at 1:10.

Teddy has to go in and do something he doesn’t want to do post match. He raises Cesaro’s hand and then Cesaro kisses Aksana.

Long video on Lesnar vs. Cena, including clips from the sitdown interview and from Edge’s promo on Monday. Cena hasn’t said much in this.

Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes

This is as a result of the attack before the six man from last week. Cody is still sore from the whipping Show gave him earlier. Cody goes for the knee which doesn’t work at all. He manages to take Khali down and DDTs the knee before going up top. A missile dropkick puts Khali down for two. Back to the knee but Khali gets up and uses some clotheslines to take Cody down. Disaster Kick is caught in the Plunge….for the clean pin at 1:59. Oh good grief I’m not going to bother explaining how stupid this is.

Washington pitches to the tag champions some more and thinks Rosa should talk some more. He needs a decision by Monday though. Ryback comes up and glares at them and walks away. Washington tries to set up a meeting with him.

The Usos are watching in the back.

Jacob Kaye vs. Ryback

Kaye says that he’s not going to be another no name schnook. I like this guy already. He’s from Grand Rapids and has been trying to escape it for years now. Kaye charges at him and gets thrown down immediately. Ryback kicks his head off and chokes him with the boot. Gorilla press into a powerslam sets up the clothesline and the Muscle Buster gets the pin at 1:08. This guy is so much fun.

Video on AJ going crazy last week. She has no comment on anything but looks very evil. Kaitlyn comes up and tells Striker to leave her alone. Striker leaves and Kaitlyn tries to talk some sense into her so AJ slaps the taste out of her mouth. She immediately seems to regret it but Kaitlyn leaves. This is getting interested.

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Henry overpowers him to start so Shemaus slows down a little bit. A headlock doesn’t work and Henry puts him down again. Sheamus goes to the knee and takes Henry down for two. He goes for the arm but Henry shoves him to the floor with ease. Sheamus comes back with the slingshot shoulder for two and we take a break. Back with Henry slamming the champ to take over.

Henry gets knocked to the apron and Sheamus hits the ten forearms which are getting cheered a lot better lately. Henry easily throws Sheamus down though and hits a HARD whip into the barricade. Back in for a quick nerve hold but Sheamus gets out. Henry hits something that looked like a crescent kick to put Sheamus down for two. Sheamus comes back with his double ax handles to the chest and down goes Henry.

A DDT gets two for the champion. He’s getting fired up now and starts to pound his chest and shouting Brogue. Probably due to shouting very loudly, Henry is able to run him over for two. A charge misses and Sheamus goes up but jumps over Henry. Brogue Kick takes Henry’s head off for the pin at 7:26 shown of 10:56.

Rating: C. This was exactly what you would expect from these two. Henry is the perfect foil for a guy like Sheamus as it looks impressive when Sheamus beats him but Henry’s power is good enough to give Sheamus a threat. Also it helps that Sheamus has a finisher that he can hit on anyone instead of a power move.

Bryan comes to the apron and Sheamus invites him down. Sheamus says this Sunday won’t be a fluke and there won’t be an AJ to blame. Will Sheamus kick Bryan’s head off and keep the title? YES! YES! YES! The chant ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this show for the most part other than the Khali win. For the life of me is it a crime to make him look strong before a rematch? Anyway I liked a lot about this, including the push for the world title match and Ryback’s match, as he’s the more interesting version of someone like Tensai, minus the big win. Good show here and they pushed the PPV strong, which is the right idea.

Results
Big Show b. Albert Del Rio via DQ when Cody Rhodes interfered
Nikki Bella b. Alicia Fox – Brie Bella pinned Fox after a facejam
Darren Young/Titus O’Neil b. Yoshi Tatsu/Ezekiel Jackson – Double Team Powerbomb
Antonio Cesaro b. Tyson Kidd – Cradle Pancake
Great Khali b. Cody Rhodes – Punjabi Plunge
Ryback b. Jacob Kaye – Muscle Buster
Sheamus b. Mark Henry – Brogue Kick

Remember to like this on Facebook and follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 12, 1998
Location: Tsongas Arena, Lowell, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re on Saturday again for our first of two Raws in three days. We’re continuing the push to Breakdown on the 28th. We’re in the full stretch of Austin vs. Vince now as Vince is trying to have Kane and Undertaker get the title off Austin by manipulating them somehow. Other than that we’re kind of transitioning from the Summer to the end of the year which culminates at Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

The arena looks really different here as the aisle is shaped like an L instead of a straight line, so the video screen (not the Titantron) is on the opposite side from the camera instead of on the side if that makes sense.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Edge

Jarrett takes over quickly and rams Edge into the buckle. Edge comes back with an enziguri and here’s Southern Justice with a guitar. Jeff hits a powerslam for two. Northern lights suplex gets two for the Canadian. They’re going back and forth very quickly here. Out to the floor goes Edge but he comes back with a top rope cross body for two. Jarrett hits what would become the Stroke for no cover. DDT gets two for Jarrett as does a catapult into the buckle for Edge. Edge hits two Amigos and a sitout gordbuster for the third. And there’s the guitar shot for the DQ loss for Jarrett.

Rating: C. This was getting good until the end with the lame ending. Edge was a great addition to the roster in a few years but here he was still learning his stuff pretty slowly. Jarrett got MUCH better after getting his haircut and starting the guitar stuff. Also dropping the stupid country music stuff helped a lot.

Austin vs. Kane vs. Undertaker later tonight. Gee that’s kind of a quick addition.

Bradshaw vs. Darren Drozdov

Droz has a torn bicep coming into this. Bradshaw runs him down almost immediately and suplexes Droz for two. Droz comes back with a powerslam but gets backdropped to the floor. Back in the big boot misses and Drozdov hits a big shoulder block to take over. Apparently that triple threat I mentioned earlier is for Breakdown, not tonight. Droz counters the Clothesline and hits a DDT followed by a three point clothesline for two. Bradshaw scoops the feet in the corner and puts his own feet on the ropes for the cheap pin.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but I never got the appeal of Droz. When you have what he had as a gimmick there’s only so far you can go but he tried. Bradshaw was just waiting for the APA to hook up so he’d have anything to do. Until then he was just a ticked off Texan of which there were about a hundred over the years. Not bad, but just a filler.

I think this show was more like a special rather than a full episode of Raw as we get a long recap of Austin/Kane/Undertaker from over the summer.

Mark Mero vs. Miguel Perez

Yeah this is acting a lot more like a special as there aren’t any promos or anything but a bunch of quick matches. Also it seems like this show is a little shorter than most usual ones. Feeling out process to start as Perez is using his speed advantage to take over. A dropkick puts Mero on the floor and Marc slows things down a bit. Top wristlock gets no one anywhere but Mero takes over with a clothesline in the corner. Perez comes back with a dropkick and standing moonsault for two. DDT gets the same but Perez walks into the TKO for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here but it was a glorified squash which I’m not a fan of. At the very least we didn’t have to hear Jackie talk during this. Perez was never on Raw again so at least he went out losing. Granted I don’t think I ever saw him win so this isn’t a shock. Is it clear I’m trying to fill in this space yet?

The Oddities aren’t worried about the DOA later.

Disciples of Apocalypse vs. Oddities

Golga and Kurrgan here. The ICP play them to the ring again here which was probably a bigger deal back then. Kurrgan and I think Skull start things off before it’s time for the jumping Cartman loving Earthquake. King has Golga’s Cartman next to him with the crown on it. Golga loads up the Earthquake….and the top rope breaks. It falls off the corner and Golga gets choked with it. The ICP run in for the DQ because the ring is broken.

The clowns get beaten up post match.

Here’s Rock with something to say. He wants to talk about the ladder match at Summerslam where he beat up HHH for thirty minutes but then HHH climbed the ladder and stole the Rock’s Intercontinental Title. The Rock will always be the People’s Champion though. Lately though people have had issues knowing their roles. Those people would be the Undertaker and Kane. Kane isn’t going to get away with chokeslamming the Rock and sometime soon Rock will be coming for Kane. This would be something very close to a face turn.

And now for something completely different, here’s the Lion’s Den match from Summerslam, in its entirety.

Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. I know that because Ross said that this match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. So this is the WWF version of the UFC cage but they’re wrestling a WWF style match in there, which is about what you’d expect I guess, as it’s pretty clear Shamrock wouldn’t have much trouble in a real MMA fight with Owen.

Hart would hang on for awhile, but it’s not likely he would have much of a chance in the long run. The cage offers some different effects, but it’s nothing earth shattering. It’s better than a normal match would have been though, as it suits Shamrock very well. Speaking of that, he hits a sweet move as he gets a running start and plants his foot on the cage to jump backwards and catch Owen with I think either a back elbow or a dropkick.

Either way it looks very good and he nailed him with it. The cage isn’t really offering a lot of differences, but the main one is on whips. With no ropes, you’re just hitting cage, which has to hurt pretty badly. Hart gets the sharpshooter, which Ross says no one does better. Remind me never to leave WWF.

This is likely the coolest spot of the match as Shamrock crawls to the cage and climbs it while in the Sharpshooter, forcing the hold to be broken. The problem is they just brush over it, despite it being brilliant. Owen gets a choke on him but Shamrock runs up the cage to backflip out of it and gets the real ankle lock, not the Angle lock, to get the win.

Rating: B-. This was a weird concept and I guess it worked. It didn’t really fail, but it just wasn’t the best thing in the world. Overall the in cage stuff was fine, but it just wasn’t to my liking and I’m glad it only happened like three times. Shamrock never quite clicked in the WWF until the next year, so that can’t get here soon enough.

Too Much vs. Southern Justice

Christopher and Knight start with Lawler playing cheerleader for his son. Off to Taylor who doesn’t have the same luck. Knight kicks him in the chest which gets a hug from Christopher. From what I can tell, Too Much was going to be Billy and Chuck in the Attitude Era but it didn’t come together. It turns into a power vs. speed match as Brian tries a cross body out of the corner but gets caught in a powerslam for two. Hot tag brings in Scotty but there’s too much power for Too Much and the Slop Drop pins Scotty.

Rating: D. Whatever again here man. It’s very clear that this is just a placeholder show until we get to the real stuff again in two days. That gets really annoying though as we have to sit through a show with stuff like we’ve gotten so far. I watched Summerslam so why would I want to see that match again on Raw?

Promo of the old guys saying they love the new generation.

Dustin Runnels vs. Vader

Dustin is wearing the “He Is Coming Back” shirt. Vader drills him and pounds him down but is too fat to be Vader anymore. The beating goes on for awhile but Dustin gets in a shot to break the momentum. He makes his comeback (get it?) but sees Val in the crowd with a sign saying “I Have Come.” Ok that’s kind of funny. Vader jumps the distracted Dustin and actually wins the match with a Vader Bomb. This was very short.

Video on Sable, focusing on her match from Summerslam.

Al Snow is here and wants to talk to Vince. He gets Slaughter, Patterson and Brisco instead. It’s a comedy segment that ends with Patterson getting a shot between the legs from Head. Get this show over with already!

The Headbangers think it’s Saturday.

Headbangers vs. D’Lo Brown/Mark Henry

Brown and Mosh start things off with Mosh in control. Off to Thrasher who hits a flapjack for two. Henry comes in and it takes double teaming to take him down. A double suplex puts Henry down and it’s back to Mosh vs. D’Lo, with the latter hitting a running powerbomb for two. The Headbangers throw the Nation together and here’s Chyna for the DQ. Too short to mean anything but it was bad.

D-Generation X vs. Kai En Tai

Taka and Roadie start things off. The Outlaws double team Taka so it’s time for Funaki. Men’s Teioh comes in and the squash continues. HHH comes in and doesn’t bother to take his hat off. HHH chops him in the chest and hits the high knee before bringing Dogg back in. The heels take over and quadruple team Road Dogg with elbows and a dropkick from Taka. Top rope splash gets two for Togo. Road Dogg moves from a top rope splash from Taka and it’s off to Pac. Things speed up and everything breaks down. A gorilla press from Billy into the X-Factor pins Taka.

Rating: C-. A squash match to end this wretched show. For some reason that doesn’t surprise me. There was never any doubt that DX was going to win this and they never broke a sweat. The Nation didn’t even come out to try to avenge the earlier DQ loss. In other words, it’s a pretty worthless main event, although that finisher was cool.

HHH gets a fan to flash DX to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. For the love of all things good and holy, NEVER LET AUSTIN AND VINCE BE OFF THE SHOW AGAIN! This was one of the least interesting shows I can ever remember with no main event guys showing up and therefore making it almost a lame house show. I don’t know if everyone else was on vacation or what but this show came off like it was nothing. The ONLY thing of note here is Rock calling out Kane which could have been done on any other show. Just horrible and totally not needed, especially with regular Raw being back in two days.

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall

And follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Smackdown
Date: January 6, 2012
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

I’m presuming Booker will be on commentary here. Anyway tonight we have a double main event with two title matches. First of all we have Booker challenging Cody for the IC Title in their rubber match in what should be good. We also get Bryan defending the world title against Big Show in what should be an interesting match as I’m really not sure how well Bryan will be able to manage against a monster. He’s a great seller though which should help. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Orton vs. Barrett last week.

Booker isn’t on commentary.

Intercontinental Title: Booker T vs. Cody Rhodes

Feeling out process to start and Booker has a very mild advantage. Cody takes over and works on the arm. They chop it out with Booker winning. They’re starting slowly here which implies they’ll have a lot of time to work with. Booker sends him to the floor where he gets dropped onto the railing. We take a break with Rhodes in control. Back with the same circumstances, just in the ring this time.

Backslide gets two for the challenger as does a big kick. Rhodes blocks a shot into the corner and tries the top rope standing moonsault, which only partially hits. Cody seemed to have hurt his leg coming down. He isn’t limping so maybe it was just a quick flash of pain. Off to a double arm hold, as in imagine if Booker is sitting down and Cody has Booker’s arms like he’s trying a double arm DDT or butterfly suplex.

Spinebuster takes Cody down but Booker can’t hit the scissors kick or the Book End. The second attempt at the kick gets two. Big reaction on the kickout too. Cody gets up and sends Booker into the corner where he sets for the Jack Brisco sunset flip but Cody stays in the middle of the ring. Booker tries a side kick but Cody ducks and hits the Beautiful Disaster for the pin at 9:12 shown of 12:42.

Rating: C+. Pretty good match and they made Booker look good here as it came off like he got caught rather than he got beat. I’ve heard rumors he might have something else like this and I wouldn’t be all that opposed to it. There’s nothing wrong with a guy that still gets a reaction from the crowd being used to put someone over like he did for Rhodes here.

Cody is walking in the back and Dustin pops up to congratulate him on a big victory. Cody yells at him, saying this is why they don’t talk. He’s already more of a success than his brother and he might be a better one than his dad. If Dustin considers putting on the gold paint for one more run, think twice because he’s a joke but not a laughing stock. Cody can change that though, so don’t try it.

Ryder is with Teddy and says he’s stepping down as assistant to the GM. Drew pops in but Ryder offers up Santino to be the new assistant, which is accepted. Zack leaves and Santino mentions some of the things he can do for Teddy, including syncing his iPod. As for Drew, he’s got Santino tonight and if he loses, he’s on very thin ice. If Santino wins, he’s officially the assistant. Drew leaves and here’s Aksana. Santino leaves while the two of them make dinner plans.

Royal Rumble moment: Cena returns. Screw WWE.com’s list. That’s the #1 moment in the history of the Rumble…..maybe. It’s probably either that or Hogan vs. Warrior. Either way it’s better than their’s: Shawn survives from #1.

Alicia is talking to AJ and AJ is really happy with Daniel. She’s worried about his match though. Bryan pops up to a pop which I don’t buy. He brags about beating Big Show and Alicia leaves. AJ is nervous about the match and Bryan is very confident. Sex is implied for later.

Hornswoggle vs. Heath Slater

This is an over the top rope challenge, so basically a two man battle royal. Horny looks at something in the lights and when Slater looks, Horny stomps on his foot. Slater chokes in the corner as we’re certainly in a comedy match. Horny tries a middle rope cross body but gets caught. Slater tries to dump him but Horny uses leverage and hair for the win at 1:37. This was just for the kids.

Slater beats him down post match but Gabriel makes the save. He hits the 450 and we cut to a very closeup shot on Slater, as in it looked like it was about a foot from his body on the mat and pointed at the corner.

Don’t be a bully.

Ted DiBiase vs. Hunico

Camacho, the bodyguard, has a mic. Oh wait it’s Hunico with the mic and Camacho is riding the bike. Both of them talk and aren’t happy that they didn’t get invited to join the DiBiase Posse. That Lowrider bike just isn’t working for me. Hunico tries to speed things up to start and hooks a headscissors which DiBiase countered into kind of a reverse sitout powerbomb. That could be a solid finisher if used by some power guy.

Hunico takes it to the mat and hooks a Fujiwara Armbar. DiBiase comes back and hits some dropkicks but Dream Street is countered. The arm goes into the buckle and Hunico locks in one of the weirdest pinning combinations I’ve ever seen. Basically DiBiase looked like he was in a backslide but Hunico was on one knee with DiBiase’s legs on his shoulders and was looking the other way. No idea what that’s called but it gets the pin at 3:06.

Rating: C. I liked this a lot as there was some basic psychology in it. Hunico worked on the arm which weakened DiBiase’s finisher, then DiBiase couldn’t hit Dream Street, Hunico went back to the arm and it led straight to the finish. Now why can’t we see something that simple a lot more often?

At the end of the day though, they’re riding away on a bicycle. Not working for me.

Here’s Barret and apparently this is supposed to be an update on Orton. Barrett says he’ll be handling this update instead of the doctors. We see a clip of the end of the show last week. As for the medical update, he has a herniated disc. As for his career update, he’s done. Oh sure he might try to come back someday but his mental edge is gone.

That brings us to the Royal Rumble in Orton’s hometown, where Orton will have to sit in the crowd and watch him win. There isn’t a single superstar that can stop him from winning. Cue Sheamus with a rebuttal. I like the idea of this feud as Sheamus needs something to do until the Rumble and Barrett can’t get to Bryan yet while the monsters are still after him. Sheamus says Barrett is like his uncle: a big talker, but just a sheepherder. Well at least he’s not a bushwhacker. However the uncle had been kicked in the head as a child so he wasn’t all there. Now what’s Barrett’s excuse?

They’re about to fight when they’re interrupted by…..Jinder Mahal? He doesn’t say anything but slaps Sheamus in the face. Sheamus fights them off but sets for a Celtic Cross on Barrett. Mahal gets in a shot but Sheamus destroys him again. Sheamus walks into Winds of Change and Barrett leaves. Sheamus gets put in a camel clutch and Jinder stands tall. Why are they going with this match again? Sheamus has destroyed him every time they’ve been together and they’re doing it again? Why? Hopefully so it’ll lead to Barrett vs. Sheamus, which is what it probably is.

We recap the Show/Bryan/Henry ordeal at TLC.

Santino Marella vs. Drew McIntyre

If Santino wins he’s the assistant to the GM and Drew is on very thin ice. Santino does his splits and hammers away. Drew comes back with a suplex, getting two. Futureshock is countered but Drew keeps control. Drew sets up a superplex but Santino slips off the top (intentionally) and sends Drew into the post. Cobra ends this at 2:28. Cole: “We’re going to go the way of WCW with these two running the show.” I’m fine with Santino here as it’s going to be played for comedy and it gives him something to do. No harm no foul here as Drew isn’t doing anything anyway.

In the back, Drew is freaking out when Teddy comes in. Drew says that can’t count because of a greased rope or something. Teddy says that’s strike two and next week, if it’s strike three he very well may be out.

Epico/Primo vs. Air Boom

Non-title here. Rosa is rather enjoying to watch. We haven’t seen the champs in awhile. I think that’s Epico starting with Bourne. Bourne lands on his feet out of a snapmare attempt and it’s off to Kofi. The champs combine to do AJ Styles’ dropdown to the dropkick spot. Rosa: “Ay caramba!” Off to Primo as we hear about Epico playing baseball at Western Michigan University. Kofi gets in a shot and double tags bring in Bourne and Primo. Bourne speeds things up and everything breaks down. Kofi sets to dive but Rosa blocks I think Primo. Bourne tries Air Bourne but Epico pulls Primo out and Bourne crashes, getting pinned at 3:50.

Rating: C-. The match was ok with a little change of pace since it’s usually Kofi that plays cleanup. I’m really not wild on the way Epico and Primo seem to be getting their push towards the title here because they’ve already lost to the champs a few times so now why should they be getting more shots? It’s FAR too common of a way of building to a title match and I’ve never been a fan of it.

Big Show says that tonight he’ll be conscious and he’ll get the title back. Bryan may be a good wrestler….and here he is. Bryan comes off like a total jerk here, talking about how Show is all natural and Bryan had to work to get where he is. If Bryan had been born as big as Show is, it wouldn’t have been 9 years between his title reigns. Show puts his hand on his shoulder and says don’t make me hurt you out there. Bryan doesn’t like being touched and is very defensive about it. Pretty heelish promo by Bryan here.

Sheamus vs. Jinder next week.

Natalya vs. Tamina

We get a quick highlight package of both of their papas before the match. Natalya takes her down quickly and pounds away at Tamina, shouting about family. Tamina tries a cross body but bounces off Natalya instead of falling on top of her. A Samoan Drop sets up the Superfly Splash and we’re done at 1:42. Standard Divas match anymore.

Raw ReBound.

Still don’t be a bully. If we have to Stand Up For WWE this fall again I’ll pull my hair out.

The same Rumble moment from Raw is shown here: Hacksaw winning it.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Daniel Bryan

Henry joins us for commentary, probably giving away the ending already. We get big match intros. Cole asks Henry who would win between Bryan and Hornswoggle. Henry GOES OFF, ranting about how that has nothing to do with this match and how it has nothing to do with him not having the title, which is all that matters here. Henry: “If you don’t got nothing intelligent to say, don’t say nothing at all.”

Show charges right at Bryan so the champ has to use speed maneuvers. Josh asks Henry if he thinks it’s fair that Show gets the first shot. Henry says no so Josh points out that Show was the champion that Bryan beat. He gets cut off by Henry who tells Josh to shut up. I’m LOVING Henry on commentary here. He’s all ticked off and tells people what he thinks. Show grabs him by the throat and throws him to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Bryan firing away kicks to no effect. He goes to the floor and after a quick switch, Bryan hits a baseball slide to send Show back to the table. Henry: “Why you all jumping?” Cole: “It might have something to do with a 500lb man coming at us.” A plancha is caught but Show’s knees go into the post. His head does the same and Bryan tries to win via countout. Back in and Show is mad.

Bryan manages to get his to his knees and fires off the kicks which have no effect. Cole and Henry are cracking me up with Henry refusing to admit he’s wrong on anything, even stuff that makes no sense and scaring Cole into agreeing. That’s what a monster should do. Bryan goes outside again so Show pulls him up by the hair. FREAKING OW MAN! Bryan tries something off the top but jumps into a chop. Show comes out of the corner and spears Bryan down for a very delayed two.

Henry is standing up now. He actually gives Bryan credit for kicking out of that. Show pulls the straps down and calls for the chokeslam but Bryan counters into a guillotine. Why Show doesn’t use his free hand to punch Bryan in the ribs is beyond me but whatever. Bryan is bleeding from the mouth and he shifts to a LeBell Lock. Show breaks it pretty easily and pulls up the big punch but Bryan hits the floor. Bryan gets in Henry’s face and Henry shoves him, so Bryan yells to the referee and it’s a DQ. Total heel move there by Bryan. Match ran 6:17 shown of 9:47.

Rating: C-. Well it wasn’t awful and Bryan made it more believable than I’d expect but the ending is a good thing. Without a ton of cheating or making Show look like an idiot, there aren’t many ways you can conceivably have Bryan win here. Show easily breaking the LeBell Lock was a good example of it. Bryan does know a bunch of holds, but Show is so big and powerful that it’s a stretch to believe he can keep Show in them. I’m interested in this heel turn that Bryan is heavily teasing though.

Bryan does the huge post match celebration as usual.

Overall Rating: B-. Not a great show but I thought this was pretty good. We got some stories advanced tonight and some new stuff like Barrett vs. Sheamus set up. Bryan’s heelish ways are interesting as he can only be interesting as the face champion that escapes with the title for so long. Good show here and a good way to start the new year.

Results
Cody Rhodes b. Booker T – Beautiful Disaster
Hornswoggle b. Heath Slater – Slater hit the floor
Hunico b. Ted DiBiase – Bridging Rollup
Santino Marella b. Drew McIntyre – Cobra
Epico/Primo b. Air Boom – Epico pinned Bourne after a missed Air Bourne
Tamina b. Natalya – Superfly Splash
Daniel Bryan b. Big Show via disqualification when Mark Henry interfered

Remember to like me on Facebook at:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/kbwrestlingreviewscom/117930294974885?sk=wall