Smackdown – October 7, 2004: Compliments Instead Of Insults

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: October 7, 2004
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re past No Mercy and there isn’t much to say. Undertaker is now dealing with Heidenreich, JBL retained the title and John Cena got the US Title back. The next major show is Survivor Series and at least we aren’t likely to hear the wrestlers burying the show before we get there. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Last Ride match with (stop me if you’ve heard this before) JBL taking a horrible beating and surviving as champion.

Opening sequence.

Here’s hometown boy John Cena to open things up because the champ is home. After bragging about how the Red Sox and Patriots are winning (like that’s going to last), Cena actually gives some respect to Booker and the fans aren’t sure about that one. Cena: “Ok now back to making fun of people.” That brings him to Cole, who is ugly, sucks, and talks very slowly. We’re doing something different tonight so he’s going to have a fan come in here and insult Cole with him.

Cue the debuting Carlito Caribbean Cool to say that US Title is cool. The Red Sox jersey isn’t though because those guys never win and that makes Cena a punk. He loads up the apple but Cena makes baseball jokes (fair enough in this town) and threatens to make Carlito swallow instead of spit. Carlito laughs it off and says Cena took five matches to win the US Title but he can do it in one. The challenge is sent out but Carlito wants to do it later tonight so he doesn’t mess up his clothes. Cena extends a hand but gets caught with a DDT, plus some apple spit. This was a bit rushed, though I’ve never been a Carlito fan.

Rey Mysterio vs. Kenzo Suzuki

Rob Van Dam is here with Rey. Mysterio’s music cuts off Rene Dupree’s entrance and likely singing. Rey speeds things up to start and kicks the leg but gets kicked in his face to slow things back down. A chop to a seated Mysterio sets up an armbar, which doesn’t last long because it’s just an armbar. Back up and Suzuki grabs a double underhook shoulder breaker but Rey shrugs it off and hits a seated senton. A springboard corkscrew splash gets two and Rene’s distraction earns himself the 619. Another one hits Kenzo and the claw legsweep (still an awful move) is easily countered into a rollup to give Rey the pin.

Rating: C-. It looks like Mysterio and Van Dam are next in line for another title shot and that’s perfectly fine. The tag division is barely a thing at the moment so having the two of them put together into a makeshift team is as good an idea as anything else. Whoever gets the title off of Kenzo is fine with me as he’s somehow getting even less interesting as time goes on.

WWE received an award from Make-A-Wish.

JBL brags about retaining the title and says he didn’t know Heidenreich would be there to help him. He’s still the WWE Champion and doesn’t like the idea of having to face Hardcore Holly again. The fans love him though and they can start those JBL chants right now.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Hardcore Holly

Non-title. Holly wastes no time in going after JBL’s bandaged head and pounds away with right hands. You can’t fault his logic. The gut is busted open in a hurry and Holly has no problem kicking him in the head with the blood getting on his boot. JBL manages a fall away slam to send Holly outside where he goes head first into the announcers’ table.

Holly sends him into the steps and the blood is flowing very well, including as a suplex gets two on JBL. Cue Orlando Jordan, who is totally fine after last week’s crucifixion. Holly’s dropkick gets two and a top rope elbow gets the same. The Alabama Slam looks to finish but a Jordan distraction lets JBL get outside. Jordan grabs the leg again and JBL takes the countout.

Rating: C. Another not too bad match from these two though they’re really not doing themselves any favors with JBL. I know he’s not the greatest champion in the world, but having him mostly get beaten up by career jobber to the stars Hardcore Holly is making JBL even harder to take seriously. At least WWE isn’t treating Holly as a threat to the title again though, as I’m still not entirely over that.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. is coming back in two weeks. That’s not the biggest deal in the world but given the injury, it’s a nice little story.

Theodore Long tells Paul Heyman that Heidenreich stepped over the line and nothing like that is happening again here. It took the jaws of life to get Undertaker out of the hearse but the Undertaker was gone. Since laws don’t exist in WWE unless the script calls for them, Long isn’t punishing Heidenreich because Undertaker will deal with it himself. Heyman stammers that it doesn’t matter to Heidenreich, who will recite poetry tonight.

Raw Rebound.

Kurt Angle explains that he was sick at No Mercy and had to face Big Show anyway. He’s ready to take on Big Show tonight but his doctors won’t let him. Mark Jindrak can do it instead and Angle will be at ringside.

Next week: JBL vs. Holly in a hardcore match for the title.

Mark Jindrak vs. Big Show

Luther Reigns is at ringside and Angle is on commentary but he stares straight at Show without saying a word. Show throws Jindrak over the top to start and then stands on his chest in the corner (without grabbing the rope) as the beating is on in a hurry. The beating bores Show, who goes outside to yell at Angle (still hasn’t said anything) but gets dropkicked off the apron.

There’s a whip into the steps for two back inside and it’s time to start on Show’s arm. It’s kind of hard to whip a giant into the post though and Show sends him to the floor with one arm. Luther Reigns tries to get in but Eddie Guerrero comes down to cut him off. Angle’s interference fails and Show chokeslams Jindrak for the pin.

Rating: D+. It’s not likely to last long but at least Show is getting to look good for the time being. He’s seemed more focused and aggressive of late and that’s working for him. Jindrak has a lot of the tools to get over, though being a lackey isn’t the best way to go about it. Then again he never had much of a spark so you can only expect so much from him.

Carlito says he didn’t disrespect Cena because it was the other way around. He commands respect and tonight, everyone will learn the definition of cool when he becomes the US Champion. Carlito’s graphic comes up, which you don’t see very often after a promo.

We look back at Billy Kidman injuring Paul London at No Mercy and blaming the fans.

Billy Kidman vs. Charlie Haas

Jackie Gayda is in Haas’ corner. Charlie works on the arm to start, including an armdrag into a rollup for two. A hotshot cuts Haas off and let’s talk about the Undertaker out of nowhere. The chinlock stays on the general throat area until Haas fights up with a t-bone suplex. A spinning top rope crossbody gets two but Haas charges into raised boots in the corner.

The shooting star press is loaded up but Jackie climbs onto Charlie to protect him. Kidman kicks Haas to the floor and BK Bombs Jackie before heading up again. There’s no shooting star though as Kidman says he doesn’t think so and climbs down as Rico comes in to take care of Jackie. No contest.

Rating: D+. I’m liking this Kidman story more and more every week, though I’m expecting it to come to an end with Chavo beating him. He’s doing some interesting stuff as you don’t often get into the mental side of a wrestler and it’s an interesting place to go. They’ve gone somewhere and while I get that it’s going to end, it’s kind of a shame as Kidman has gotten a nice rub from this.

Jordan bumps into Booker T. and asks to hear the SUCKA. Booker doesn’t want anything to do with him because Jordan is just an errand boy. And I guess Booker is just a face again, even though there are already as many if not more top faces than top heels.

Another look back at the Last Ride match and the end of No Mercy.

We see some more potential Tough Enough finalists, including Marty Wright (Boogeyman).

Here’s Heidenreich for poetry time with Heyman handling the introduction while also panicking over Undertaker not being in the hearse. Heidenreich says no one, including Undertaker, better interrupt him as he recites his masterpiece. Therefore the fans boo him and keep cutting him off because they don’t understand that they’re just extending their own agony. Heidenreich actually goes into the crowd and beats up some fans, all of whom happen to have some good camera presence.

US Title: Carlito Caribbean Cool vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and Carlito runs scared to start. You can only run so far though as Cena blasts him with a clothesline and whips him into the steps for a bonus. Another whip into the corner has Cena looking confident, which is never a good sign. A delayed vertical suplex, complete with squats, has Carlito in even more trouble. Cena shows off again with a one armed side slam.

It’s kind of strange to see Cena being this cocky but it’s making him look like a bigger star. Carlito gets whipped into the steps but manages to low bridge Cena to the floor. Cena is fine enough to catapult him into the crowd and the posing in the ring takes us to a break. Back with Carlito ducking a crossbody and grabbing a swinging neckbreaker for two. A slingshot elbow gets the same and we hit the chinlock.

Cena powers out with a backdrop and the comeback is on with the usual. The Shuffle gets two and Cena throws him outside but the referee won’t let Cena follow. That means Carlito can pick up the title, which Cena takes away. The referee takes it next, allowing Carlito to use the chain on Cena for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. This was a weird one with Cena dominating for the most part until Carlito got in the cheating shot to win the title. It’s certainly a strong way to debut someone and makes Carlito look like a pesky thief that deserves a beating, though it doesn’t help the fact that it’s still Carlito and he still looks like he’s a seventeen year old with a bad static electricity shock.

Carlito steals the chain to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Maybe it’s the comparison to Raw, but this is the kind of show that makes it clear how much better Smackdown is at the moment. There was a point to almost everything on the show and they set things up throughout the night. On top of that, it doesn’t feel nearly as repetitive and there were no insults from the wrestlers about the upcoming pay per view. Raw is becoming harder and harder to watch while this show is enjoyable, despite having nowhere near as top level stars. I don’t know if it’s going to keep lasting this way, but it’s nice at the moment.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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SuperBrawl Revenge (SuperBrawl 2001, 2016 Redo): One More Time

SuperBrawl Revenge
Date: February 18, 2001
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 4,395
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

I’m still not sure what the REVENGE subtitle is referring to but it might be due to the fact that we’ve seen several of these matches on TV in recent weeks. The main event is Kevin Nash challenging Scott Steiner for the World Title in a match we saw just six days ago on Nitro. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks like something out of a serial killer movie with someone cutting out pictures of Ric Flair and cutting words like PSYCHO and GREED out of magazines and newspapers. No idea what it meant but at least it looked cool.

Jamie Knoble vs. Evan Karagias vs. Kaz Hayashi vs. Yang vs. Shannon Moore vs. Shane Helms

Elimination match for the #1 contendership. Helms is a replacement after Animal attacked Kidman so we can have these six opening ANOTHER pay per view. Thankfully there are tags here so it won’t be as insane to keep track of. Well at least to start because there’s no way the tags last. Jamie and Shannon start things off but Shane comes in with Shannon tossing Jamie into a powerbomb for two.

Even sends 3 Count to the floor with the Dragons hitting stereo Asai Moonsaults (which the camera mostly misses). Back in and the Dragons double team Jamie, followed by Kaz headscissoring him into the middle turnbuckle. Jamie fights back and it’s off to Evan to beat on Yang. I know it’s not exactly a surprise but it would have been nice to not have a three way tag for a change.

Karagias plants Yang with a full nelson slam and then almost completely misses a springboard dive. Shane tags himself in and goes nuts on Evan before getting spun around into a rollup by Yang. Things are starting to speed up a bit with the Samoan Drop/neckbreaker combination getting two on Yang as Kaz makes the save. Tony says anyone could have made a save and Hudson talks about how anyone should have because he doesn’t know the rules of this thing.

The tags start getting much faster until Kaz starts cleaning house, only to have Evan drive him into the corner. Shane pops up with a top rope superplex to drop Kaz, followed by FIVE straight missed top rope moves to put all six down. Hudson: “The first man to his feet has to be the legal man.” No Scott, that’s not how wrestling works.

Kaz springboards into a kick to Evan’s head, only to get kicked into an X Plex from Shane. Evan hits a good looking springboard dive to take out Shane and Yang on the floor. We get the parade of dives with Jamie going last and being the only man standing. Back in and Evan gorilla presses Kaz into a spinebuster for two, followed by a powerbomb/missile dropkick combo but Jamie and Evan fight over who gets to cover. Guys don’t listen to Scott Hudson. It just destroys your career. In the melee, Yang grabs an over the back piledriver on Evan for the first elimination.

Jamie slips back in and grabs a tombstone to get rid of Yang to get us down to four. 3 Count’s double team doesn’t work as Jamie dropkicks Shannon into the barricade, only to have Shannon come back in with a super Bottoms Up for the pin on Noble. So we’re down to Shannon, Shane and Kaz with the team looking down at Hayashi. Hudson tries to say there are no teams here because he thinks we might believe him. In a fairly scary looking spot, Shannon backslides Kaz and Shane adds a guillotine legdrop at the same time.

Shane calls for the Vertebreaker but Shannon gives him the Bottoms Up in a quick turn. We get a ref bump on the save (STOP DOING THAT!) so Shane can kick out but Shannon low blows him right back down. Kaz and Shannon double team him for a bit before Kaz throws Moore outside. Shane gets back up and hits the Nightmare on Helm Street to eliminate Shannon and we’re down to two. Kaz rolls through a top rope sunset flip and kicks Shane in the face for two, only to get caught in the Vertebreaker to give Shane the title shot.

Rating: B. The match was the fun you would expect from these six but it’s getting really tiresome to see WCW putting them against each other over and over again. It’s cool to see them get some time like this (over seventeen minutes, the longest match on the show) but of course it’s the opener and the match is likely to be forgotten in about an hour because that’s where these guys belong.

Earlier today Chavo Guerrero was with Animal and Ric Flair but we can’t hear what was said. Chavo was upset though.

Hugh Morrus says General Rection did a lot of good things for the Wall in WCW but then Rection (he’s speaking like Rection is a different person) felt Wall’s betrayal. Tonight it’s Hugh Morrus, who has nothing but hatred in his heart.

Ric gives Scott Steiner an envelope that contains Kevin Nash’s future. Scott is very pleased by this.

Commissioner Lance Storm tells Kronik (arriving half an hour into the show) that Clark has to be seen by the company doctor before he can wrestle tonight. The Brian/Bryan’s don’t seem to mind.

Hugh Morrus vs. The Wall

Grudge match following the split of the Misfits in Action. Wall hammers away to start and gets an impressive looking shoulder to knock Morrus outside. Morrus comes back with a hard shot of his own and sends Wall into the steps, which he uses to crush Wall’s head up against the post. They get back in after a few minutes on the floor with Hugh dropping a top rope elbow for no cover.

Wall comes back with some big chops, followed by headbutts in the corner. Morrus avoids a top rope legdrop and both guys are down again. A spinebuster plants Morrus and keeps up the string of hard hitting moves. Back up and Wall gets flapjacked so we can have another double breather. They slug it out from their knees, which Hudson describes as not wrestling of any type. Then why exactly am I watching? Morrus gets up first and hits a German suplex to set up No Laughing Matter for the pin.

Rating: D. This started off well with them beating on each other with heavy shots that looked like they did a lot of damage but then the ridiculous amount of laying around after big spots got annoying in a hurry. Cut this match down by about two or three minutes and it’s actually a fun power brawl but it was clear that they were out there too long. Wall didn’t look as horrible here, which is high praise in his case.

Konnan goes after Animal for what he did to Kidman.

We recap the battle of the Thrillers, which is basically about who has the Tag Team Titles, which set up a rivalry over who were the stars of the team.

Tag Team Titles: Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo vs. Mark Jindrak/Shawn Stasiak

O’Haire and Palumbo are defending. Before the match, both teams say they’re awesome and promise a win. A quick brawl breaks out at the bell before Stasiak clotheslines O’Haire to start. Sean sends Jindrak throat first into the ropes though, allowing Palumbo to get in a dropkick to the face. The champs take over with Palumbo jumping over his partner to land on Mark’s ribs before grabbing a sleeper.

Stasiak actually does something right for a change as he distracts Palumbo so Mark can get in a clothesline to take over. A double clothesline into a double nipup into a double elbow drop let the challengers show off a bit, only to have Palumbo hit that insanely hard right hand on Stasiak’s jaw. It’s not enough for the tag though as Jindrak takes him back into the corner for more stomping.

Mark grabs the chinlock on Palumbo as they’re doing the smart thing here by waiting on the hot tag to O’Haire, who is by far the most interesting of these four. Back to Stasiak for an armbar before Jindrak grabs a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. They’re certainly giving Stasiak and Jindrak a bunch of offense.

Shawn misses a top rope splash (which would have overshot Palumbo by three feet anyway) and the hot tag finally brings in O’Haire to a moderate pop. That’s not bad considering there’s no reason to cheer the champs, who never have done anything to turn face. Everything breaks down and Stasiak has to pull his partner away before the Seanton Bomb can launch. Not that it matters as Palumbo Jungle Kicks Shawn down, setting up the Seanton to retain.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all here and the clean finish did a lot of good here. Sometimes you just need one side to come off as the better team and that’s what happened in this match. O’Haire looks like a star and I’m really surprised he didn’t become a bigger deal in wrestling due to his look and athleticism alone. The other three were average at best (Palumbo) and a warm body at worst (Stasiak) with all four of them really needing personalities and/or characters.

Dustin Rhodes blames Ric Flair for keeping him out of WCW. Tonight he’s drawing first blood on his team. After that, you will never forget the name of Dustin Rhodes.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Chavo is defending after Rey won a gauntlet match earlier in the month. Rey starts fast with a running clothesline as you can see far too many empty seats in the upper deck. The champ sends him to the apron for an attempted sunset bomb which is countered into a hurricanrana to send Chavo flying. Back in and Chavo drapes him ribs first across the top rope.

Going after Rey’s ribs has worked for years so there’s no reason to not go for it again. Rey gets tied up in the Tree of Woe to work on the knee but Chavo stays on the ribs. Now that’s just versatility. It’s time for the Gory Special for a bit with Chavo teasing the Gory Bomb (not Gory Buster, no matter how many times the announcers try to refer to it as such). Rey escapes and tries a springboard, only to dive into a dropkick to the ribs. This has been all Chavo as he keeps countering everything Rey throws at him.

There’s an STF of all things before Chavo sends him outside. Rey comes up holding his knee which is quickly sent into the steps. Chavo steals a fan’s Mysterio mask and puts it on Rey before grabbing a chinlock. Back up and Rey crotches him on the turnbuckle, setting up a hurricanrana as the mask comes off. Chavo takes a breather outside so Rey flip dives over the top to take him out as he FINALLY starts acting like himself. Another springboard goes badly for Rey though as he bangs up his knee, also just like himself.

It’s time for a chair because….well I have no idea actually. Rey sends Chavo into the buckle and tries a hurricanrana, which finally sends Chavo outside after two botches. Hudson praises Rey’s execution, which Tony says is appropriate since he almost killed Chavo. That was far too close to being amusing. Cut it out Schiavone. Back in and the Bronco Buster hits Guerrero as Rey is way too healthy in a hurry. Rey goes for a chair so Chavo finds another one to crack Rey in the head, setting up the brainbuster to retain the title.

Rating: B+. What is with this show tonight? We’re almost halfway in and there has been one bad (and not even that bad) match so far. Chavo was basically wrestling himself for most of this match, which you really don’t expect out of Rey. To be fair though there’s a good chance that Mysterio is injured or at least banged up as he was so often. Chavo on the other hand is looking like the best champion in years and his matches are getting better and better every time.

Commissioner Storm moves up Kronik’s match, meaning Clark might not be tested in time.

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Rick Steiner, which is basically “Dustin is back and was here ten years ago so therefore he’s awesome” and Rick Steiner is here because he has to be.

US Title: Rick Steiner vs. Dustin Rhodes

Steiner is defending after Dustin pinned him on Nitro. Dustin starts fast with a DDT and clothesline as we hear about the Rhodes vs. Flair feud. A missed crossbody sends Dustin outside and it’s time for the brawling. Rick slowly pounds away and rakes the eyes, making sure he has as little wrestling involved as possible.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before it’s off to a half crab. It’s off to another chinlock until Dustin gets a jawbreaker (more like a Diamond Cutter) to escape. A clothesline puts Rick down again but he won’t sell a faceplant. Dustin’s bulldog sends the champ outside but the referee takes a chair away from Rhodes. During the argument, Rick takes the turnbuckle pad off and a hotshot onto the steel retains the title.

Rating: D. Rick Steiner sucks and I’m not sure I need to go much further than that. It doesn’t help that Dustin is such an uninteresting character with his clotheslines and bulldogs as we wait on the latest chapter in Dusty vs. Ric. This is probably the best example of WCW’s biggest problem: old guys hogging spots with no one else ever getting a chance. I’m no fan of his but Shane Douglas has been tossed aside in this whole thing for the sake of Steiner and that’s a downgrade at this point. At least Shane can cut a good heel promo.

Post match Rick beats on him even more but Dustin fights back and hits Shattered Dreams.

Ric tells Storm that everyone not on their team needs to be out of the building after their match. Also, Kronik vs. Totally Buff is now a #1 contenders match. Storm says consider it done. This has been your most recent plot advancement.

Diamond Dallas Page gives Cat a pep talk.

Totally Buff vs. Kronik

Before the match, Totally Buff has to laugh that Goldberg is gone. After getting through that, Buff says Clark hasn’t been medically released so this is a handicap match. Clark comes out but gets blasted in the head by a Buff chair shot to really make this two on one. Bagwell keeps moving to break up a full nelson slam and it’s an early double teaming to keep Adams in trouble. A double back elbow gets two and it’s off to Luger to stay on the back.

Adams makes a big comeback with some clotheslines and throws Bagwell at Luger. The super Blockbuster is broken up and here’s Clark into the ring as…..Bryan Clark comes out to the stage. IT’S A SWERVE as the Clark who was laid out earlier (when Kronik’s mood lighting was still on) was actually Mike Awesome in disguise. Mike lays out Adams with a German suplex, setting up the Blockbuster for the pin and the title shot at Greed.

Rating: D-. When I have to sit and try to figure out how many parts there were to a swerve, it might be a bit too complicated. It also doesn’t help that this is a match we’ve seen so many times already in recent weeks that all the novelty or interest in it has gone away. Bad on so many levels, not the least of which is Luger getting a title shot at the next pay per view.

The announcers talk about the swerve with Hudson pointing out that Storm must have been in on it, not realizing that Tony JUST SAID THAT. Bobby Heenan used to do that as a gag with Monsoon. Hudson does it because he’s not that bright.

Storm ejects Kronik from the building but they beat up security.

Lance Storm vs. The Cat

Winner is Commissioner, though if Cat wins it doesn’t take effect until midnight. Before the match we get a quick fan poll to decide who the people want as commissioner. Storm rides him to the mat to start and slaps him in the back of the head for fun. A spinning kick to the face sends Lance outside but he sends Cat into the barricade. Cat’s leg is bent around the ropes to start the build towards the Mapleleaf. Hudson says Cat won’t give up that easily because he wants that corner office back.

Storm kicks the leg out to break up a comeback bid but he takes too long going up and gets slammed back down. The leg is wrapped around the post though and Cat is down again. That lasts all of ten seconds before he comes back with his dancing offense, including the elbow drop. There’s a kick to the head but cue Mike Sanders, who is quickly taken down by Miss Jones (who is looking great tonight). The Feliner puts Storm away and makes Cat Commissioner again.

Rating: D. Thank goodness our six day international crisis is over. This could have been a lot worse but the key thing here was keeping it short. Cat is only going to be able to do so much in the ring, even with a technician like Storm out there doing most of the work for him. This was more of a spectacle, but Storm really should have been out of power longer.

Quick recap of Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page, which is mainly over Jarrett having Page arrested (went nowhere) before bringing Page’s old enemy Kanyon back to feud with Page again.

Cat is the new Commissioner but Ric has thrown him out of the building.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Not so fast because Jeff brings up Page saying he would fight Kanyon anywhere anytime.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kanyon

Kanyon sneaks in from behind but Page is ready for him with the discus lariat. They head outside with Kanyon going into the barricade a few times. Kanyon sends him in as well though, followed by a Fameasser from the apron onto the steps. Page has some blood on his eye as Kanyon suplexes him from the bottom rope back in for two. Another Fameasser (which Tony calls innovative) gets two more for Kanyon and we hit an innovative chinlock.

Back up and Kanyon uses Page’s swinging neckbreaker for two as there is a lot more blood in a hurry. Page fights back with a swinging Rock Bottom, only to eat a sitout Alabama Slam for another near fall. Kanyon hits the Cutter but the referee goes down, allowing Jarrett to come in with the Stroke. A Flatliner puts Page away.

Rating: C+. These are two guys who are going to have a good match with almost anyone you put out there and that’s what we got here. The Kanyon Cutter should have finished the match but at least the right person won here. Kanyon should have been a big deal but all the heel turns and time off really held him back.

Post match Kanyon introduces Jarrett for the original match.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Jeff Jarrett

Tony is saying Page just went “Ten, fifteen, twelve minutes” against Kanyon because just over eight minutes is close enough to twelve or fifteen. They fight into the crowd with Jarrett rocking the staggered Page with right hands. Back to ringside with Page sending him into the announcers’ table, only to be hit in the ribs with a few chair shots. Jeff drops some slow shots to the head but gets caught by the discus lariat. Sleeper, counter sleeper, jumping DDT from Page for a change of pace instead of the belly to back.

Back up and Page keeps slugging away with Jarrett going face first into the buckle over and over. Cue Kanyon, who Tony wants knocked out with a ball bat. Now come on Tony. You know it’s the ball bat that sets up the finisher which knocks people out around here. Jeff chairs Page down for two but the guitar hits Kanyon by mistake, setting up the Diamond Cutter for the pin. Hudson: “THAT IS A PERFORMANCE FOR THE HISTORY BOOKS!” For having back to back long TV matches?

Rating: C+. Despite a lot of the flack Page gets, he’s always going to give you a good match if he’s allowed the chance. It probably won’t be the best thing in the world but at least you’re guaranteed something totally watchable at worst, which is something WCW is severely lacking at this point.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. Kevin Nash. Basically Nash is standing up for WCW but Steiner hit him in the knee with a pipe on Nitro.

Ric Flair comes out for commentary on the main event.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is defending but before we have the match, let’s look at the Sid Vicious injury to show how bad Scott can be to people. Ric has an announcement to make: the loser has to retire, which apparently was the ruling in the envelope. Nash is wheeled out with some good looking nurses and the leg in a cast. It looks like a countout but Nash stands up and we’re ready to go. A belt shot to Steiner’s head pins him in 12 seconds.

Of course that’s not it as Flair says it’s 2/3 falls and no DQ. We cut to the back to see Totally Buff lay out Page in the back as Nash beats on Steiner at ringside. Nash slowly hammers away before clotheslining him out to the floor. Midajah offers a distraction so Steiner can hit Nash in the head with a pipe. Flair makes it falls count anywhere so Steiner pins him on the floor for the second fall.

Some brass knuckles shots have Nash in even more trouble as the crowd is groaning as they’re far from impressed here. Both guys are bleeding and Steiner keeps hammering away at the cut on Nash’s head. The push-ups elbow gets two followed by the t-bone suplex for the same. Another knuckles shot is blocked with Nash hitting a side slam to put both guys down.

Midajah pulls the knuckles away from Nash but Flair sends in a chair so Nash can be knocked out (Tony: “He’s dead!”). The Recliner is broken up (with Tony acting like Nash is the new Goldberg as a result) and Nash gets two off a chokeslam with Midajah making the save. The Jackknife connects but Midajah interferes AGAIN, earning herself a side slam. Flair pulls the referee out and punches him in the jaw, allowing Steiner to get in a low blow, knuckles shot, chair shot and the Recliner to retain.

Rating: F. Nash isn’t exactly the new Goldberg because it didn’t take this much to put Goldberg down. You could see what they were going for as soon as Nash pinned him off the belt shot and it was just a bunch of Tony treating Nash like the greatest thing that ever lived for the rest of the match. Nash actually wouldn’t wrestle in WCW again so for once they did something right, though I’d be surprised if he wasn’t on Nitro tomorrow.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a good example of a show where you knew exactly what you were going to get out of each match. Six man cruiserweight elimination? Good stuff. Lance Storm vs. The Cat? Waste of time. Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner? Oh please. The big surprise though was how much good stuff there actually was and the show was very nice as a result. I can’t imagine anything else they’ll have will top this but at least it was nice to have one more easy show to sit through.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – February 14, 2001: An Acceptable Valentine’s Day Present

Thunder
Date: February 14, 2001
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

This show is the equivalent of going to the gas station and buying your significant other transmission fluid for Valentine’s Day. It’s also the final show before SuperBrawl and believe it or not there’s something advertised for this week. Tonight we’ll be seeing Hugh Morrus/Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr./The Wall as two feuds are combined into one. Let’s get to it.

Nitro montage opens things up.

We see an exclusive clip of Kevin Nash being loaded into an ambulance after Nitro went off the air.

Opening sequence.

Commissioner Lance Storm is here in a suit and tells Mike Awesome he’ll be wrestling tonight. Scott Steiner comes in and demands a match so he can hurt someone.

Jamie Knoble/Evan Karagias vs. Air Paris/AJ Styles

Well this is a bit more interesting. The winners are in the #1 contenders match on Sunday. AJ drives Noble into the corner to start as Tenay talks about how great he’s heard Styles is. Believe it or not, Tenay points out that his finisher, the Shooting Styles Press is in fact named after himself. AJ dropkicks Jamie into the corner as everything breaks down and the newcomers clear the ring.

In a somewhat dangerous move, AJ backdrops Paris over the top onto both guys with Paris slightly banging up his knee. Back in and it’s Evan vs. Paris with the rookie grabbing a sitout spinebuster. Styles comes in and gets a cheap shot on Noble but gets decked from behind to change control.

Something like a Trash Compactor gets two on AJ before Jamie grabs a surfboard. Noble can’t get a tombstone as AJ grabs a pop up powerbomb for the hot tag off to Paris so everything can break down. Evan hits a great looking springboard plancha to take Styles out, setting up a Doomsday Device on Paris.

Jamie and Evan actually get in a fight over who can cover though, despite both of them moving on if they win. The delay lets Styles get back in but he takes a 450. Paris makes a save and the fans (along with me) are surprised that wasn’t the finish. AJ busts out his Shooting Styles Press to the floor (meaning it’s not actually a press) but takes out his partner by mistake. Back in and a powerbomb/missile dropkick combo puts Styles away.

Rating: B. Now that’s how you debut a team. Above all else, Styles and Paris were allowed to control for a long time which helped the match seem like a bigger win for Noble and Karagias. It’s also clear that AJ was the better prospect of the team as Paris was more of your run of the mill indy guy who happened to get a shot on TV.

Storm gives Mike Sanders Kwee Wee for later tonight.

Sean O’Haire tells Mark Jindrak to look into his eyes and fear what he sees.

We run down the SuperBrawl card.

Sean O’Haire vs. Mark Jindrak

At least it’s not Stasiak. Jindrak gets annoyed when Sean shoves him around so O’Haire punches him in the face. A running knee makes things even worse and then Sean just drops him out of a suplex. Apparently bored with beating Mark up this badly, Sean just kicks him out to the floor. To keep things going, O’Haire hits the Seanton Bomb from the apron for a nice variation on the move. He takes too long setting up the real one though and Jindrak kicks the rope to break it up.

A super hurricanrana takes Sean down for two as the fans are starting to get into this. Mark sends him to the ropes and….they presumably botch the heck out of something as we go to a shot of the crowd. Sean gets in a DDT to send Mark outside as Stasiak comes out to watch. No man, leave them alone and let them be entertaining for a change. Back in and O’Haire kicks him down to set up the Seanton Bomb for the quick pin.

Rating: C+. This was a total one man show from O’Haire as Jindrak, an athletic freak in his own right, just wasn’t keeping up with him. Sean should have been a big deal and probably put into singles action in a hurry (picture him as the super face to take down the monster Steiner down the line) but instead he’s stuck dealing with the rest of the Thrillers who are just beneath him. Like Stasiak for instance.

Jeff Jarrett and Rick Steiner want a match tonight and Storm smiles.

Kwee Wee vs. Mike Sanders

Kwee Wee jumps on him for some right hands as we’re in Angry Alan mode. A way too early piledriver attempt is countered with a backdrop but Sanders punches the mat by mistake. Instead they head outside with Kwee Wee hurricanranaing him down. A sunset flip off the apron….does nothing because it’s on the floor so Kwee Wee throws him back inside but gets caught in a suplex for two. Kwee Wee gets in a suplex of his own and sends Sanders into the corner for some right hands. A Regal Roll gets two but Sanders grabs a rollup and the tights for the pin.

Rating: D. And so much for Kwee Wee. To be fair they had to have him lose here before he started getting too popular against their will and that just couldn’t happen. Sanders had almost no offense here and Kwee Wee did all the work but which one is getting the push? Sanders of course, mainly because he wasn’t given a dead end gimmick by WCW’s amazing braintrust.

Bryan Clark is taken out of the building as he can’t wrestle tonight. Brian Adams rants until Totally Buff beats him down. Konnan comes in for the save.

Mike Awesome promises to break the Cat’s bones so he can’t land on his feet.

Mike Awesome vs. The Cat

Awesome starts fast by throwing Cat into the corner and just mauling him with forearms. Cat’s comeback is easily shoved away as there’s no answer for the power so far. A sleeper of all things slows Cat down until he comes back with…..a wristlock? That earns him a low blow for general stupidity and they head outside. Cat tries choking him with a cable but for once the referee actually does his job and breaks it up. How convenient. Mike misses a charge but Cat kicks the post by mistake, again likely due to general stupidity. Back in and a chop block sets up the Awesome Splash for the pin.

Rating: D. Miller is just not very good in the ring and it’s getting clearer every time he’s out there. Now that he’s not the Commissioner (which I’m sure he never will be again ever) there’s no hiding his uselessness and it was clear that Awesome had to tone it down again so Cat wouldn’t get squashed. Well not as squashed that is.

Diamond Dallas Page and Dustin Rhodes are ready for Rick Steiner and Jeff Jarrett tonight. Now that’s a main event worth calling your friends about. They might watch it otherwise.

Chavo Guerrero Jr./The Wall vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Hugh Morrus

Combining two feuds into one though Morrus doesn’t like either opponent in the first place. Rey and the monster start things off and for some reason, Rey tries a sunset flip. Maybe he’s been watching Cat matches to try something that stupid. It goes as badly as you would expect so Morrus comes in with a drop toehold so Rey can add a legdrop. Morrus powerslams Wall before handing it back off to Rey, who charges into a tilt-a-whirl slam. That’s better than you would expect to see from Wall.

Chavo comes in and gets caught in a quick Bronco Buster but comes back with a Gorybuster (wrong Tony) for two. Wall chokes a lot and it’s back to Chavo for a chinlock. That goes as far as a chinlock is going to go and Rey gets a breather off a hurricanrana. The hot tag brings in Morrus as everything breaks down with Rey splashing Chavo from Hugh’s shoulders. A clothesline looks to set up No Laughing Matter but Chavo makes the save, leaving Rey to springboard into a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C. Believe it or not the Wall was one of the best parts of this as he played the power role really well. Sometimes you just need a big guy around to throw a smaller person around the ring and that was where Wall excelled. Chavo vs. Rey should be good if Mysterio is ready to go while Wall vs. Morrus…..will likely me want to go make a sandwich.

Wall and Chavo beat the losers down post match.

Totally Buff make fun of Latinos before Buff faces Konnan.

Video on Nash vs. Scott Steiner.

Konnan vs. Buff Bagwell

After some Konnan rambling in what barely resembled English and Buff’s dancing, we’re ready to go. Buff chokes a lot and yells at the ref a bit before walking into a DDT for two. Back up and Buff forearms him a bit, meaning it’s time for more dancing. It’s almost like his entire offense is one move and pose. How very Justin Credible of him. A Buff chinlock slows things down even further and here’s Lex Luger for some nefarious reason. Konnan makes his comeback with his usual stuff but Luger sneaks in with the forearm to break up the Tequila Sunrise. Buff grabs a Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. Actually not horrible here with Buff working on the neck to set up the neckbreaker but you can only go so far when Buff’s offense is almost the same as it was when he debuted ten years ago. There’s something to be said for getting on the crowd’s nerves with posing etc. but that’s more than half of what Buff does in a match. It’s ok to actually wrestle every now and then.

Brian Adams was trying to limp out for the save but couldn’t get there in time.

Scott Steiner destroys catering because he wants Nash. Like he’d ever work back to back Thunders.

Diamond Dallas Page/Dustin Rhodes vs. Rick Steiner/Jeff Jarrett

So just last week’s match with Rhodes swapped in for Nash. That might actually be a downgrade for once. Jarrett says this is the world’s largest inbred family reunion and tonight is Page’s last stop. It’s a brawl to start (of course) with all four heading out to the floor. We settle down to Dustin missing a charge at Jarrett and getting beaten down by Steiner.

Page gets the tag and comes in with a top rope clothesline and neckbreaker for two. It’s back to Dustin but Jeff knees him in the back so Steiner can get in a belly to belly suplex. The double teaming continues until we get the sleeper/belly to back sequence with Jarrett. Page comes in and cleans house with the clotheslines until Steiner decks him from behind, setting up the Steiner Bulldog. A bonus Stroke is enough to put Page away.

Rating: D+. They were smart to keep this one short but the match worked well enough with three good workers and Rick Steiner there to fill in a fourth spot. It’s also a good idea to combine two feuds into one match as if nothing else you don’t have to hear Mike and Tony talk about these feuds twice. I still don’t know what WCW saw in this version of Dustin but I’m sure it’s something about being a cowboy.

Post match Scott Steiner comes in with a pipe to go after Page’s knee but everyone else comes out for a brawl with security breaking it up until Scott breaks a guard’s leg to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was actually one of their stronger entries with a really strong first half hour and bad matches going short enough that they didn’t drag the whole thing down. I’m sure the fact that Nash and Flair weren’t on the show had nothing to do with it of course. It’s not that they’re playing their roles well (especially Nash actually) but the story isn’t interesting when it leads to Nash getting ANOTHER title shot on Sunday. Anyway better show than usual this week though that’s not exactly saying much.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro – December 12, 2000: Might As Well Ruin Tuesday

Monday Night #270
Date: December 12, 2000
Location: Centurytel Center, Bossier City, Louisiana
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

It’s the go home show for the final Starrcade and the show is airing on a Tuesday, likely due to something else getting the regular timeslot on TNT. These recent shows have ranged from mostly missing to somehow shooting yourself in the foot, dropping the gun and having it shoot you in the other foot but hopefully things pick up a bit before the biggest show of the year. Let’s get to it.

This show was taped on Monday so any references to being live are pure falsehoods.

To show you how worthless Thunder is, here’s the same recap video that opened last Wednesday’s show. In other words: ignore anything on Thunder because the only show that matters is Nitro.

Lex Luger is granted a match by Mike Sanders.

Here’s Ric Flair to say we’re live (we’re not) and that we’re in Shreveport (Again not really, though the towns are about five minutes apart. Why not just have everyone say the same town?). Ric says Steiner and Sid aren’t going to come into any contact with each other in this arena. They’ll be out here talking but they’re going to hold the fighting until Starrcade. If they fight, it’s going to be a suspension and the title being stripped. As for Steiner, yeah he put Sting, Booker T. and Arn Anderson in the hospital but they could be here tonight to get some payback (I’m sure).

Sgt. AWALL is going to get a World Title match tonight and that’s finally enough to bring Sanders out to interrupt. Mike has a match of his own for tonight as the Perfect Event will face Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire and the Insiders in a non-title match. There goes Flair’s suit jacket and he makes Sid vs. Sanders. If Mike doesn’t wrestle, he loses his power and the Thrillers are barred from ringside.

Earlier today, Scott Steiner beat down Corporal Cajun until AWALL made the save to set up tonight’s title match. That’s better than I was expecting.

Sid is ready for tonight and for Sunday.

Jindrak and O’Haire have a monitor.

Disco Inferno insults Sarge so he yells a lot. So a guy famous for losing almost all the time is now one of the most intimidating guys in the company? That kind of stuff gets old in a hurry, but I’m not sure how many people remember Sarge in the first place.

Lance Storm/Major Gunns vs. The Cat/Ms. Jones

Before the match, Storm has an idea to make this more interesting: if Cat loses, he has to sing the Canadian national anthem on Thunder. Storm stops for the song and here comes Santa Claus (right down the steps instead of right down his own lane). That goes nowhere so here’s Cat to call Storm a Power Ranger. Cat makes the obvious stipulation of Storm having to sing if he loses too.

The women get things going with Gunns actually throwing a decent dropkick to knock her into the corner. Jones gets two off a spinning kick to the face and it’s off to the men. Cat dances out of a sunset flip and gets one of the loudest pops WCW has had in months. You could actually see the fans freaking out over the dancing. The Feliner gets two with Gunns (not Jones, Tony), putting the foot on the ropes. We get the catfight on the floor as Elix Skipper’s interference fails. Cat catches Duggan’s 2×4 and knocks Storm out for the pin.

Rating: D+. Who knew Cat was this over in Louisiana? Jones and Gunns were just there for their looks (not the worst idea in the world) and their wrestling was of course horrible. The Duggan thing is long overdue and I have no idea why they put him with the Canadians in the first place.

Jimmy Hart is starting a radio network and is ready to wrestle some Memphis DJ’s when Nitro hits the Mid-South Coliseum.

Hugh Morrus (yeah we’re going with that as the people are calling him Hugh most of the time) catches Lash Leroux (the gimmick names are mostly dead anyway) on the phone with Chavo. That’s fine with Hugh as he gives AWALL a pep talk.

Sanders adds Kronik to the three way dance, much to Reno’s annoyance.

Crowbar and Daffney are on commentary as Norman Smiley issues an open challenge for a hardcore match in the hopes that he gets a title shot as a result.

Meng vs. Norman Smiley

Meng has Paisley with him because that’s still a thing. Norman, complete with shoulder pads, gets stomped down in the corner as Crowbar is doing his Gordon Solie thing again. They head up the aisle with Norman actually getting in a few shots for some effect. Somehow DJ Ran still has a job (Why isn’t he fighting Jimmy Hart?) and a booth in the arena so the guys fight around there too. Santa tries to get involved so Meng drops him too, followed by some chops to make Norman scream. Norman steals Santa’s bag so here’s Santa in the ring to throw powder at both guys for a double DQ in a hardcore match.

Rating: F. That’s my standard rating for hardcore matches anymore because there’s no good reason to have guys like this (meaning Crowbar and Smiley) in this waste of time. I mean, they’re better than Brian Knobbs and company but there’s so much other stuff these people could be doing.

The blinded Meng puts the Death Grip on Paisley. Santa takes off the beard…..and it’s Terry Funk. Terry starts throwing chair shots but can’t put Meng down. Kwee Wee comes out too as Meng finally drops. Terry says he’s the real Santa Claus (Crowbar: “He’s my idol.”) and wants the Hardcore Title at Starrcade. Crowbar gets in the ring and the match seems to be on, earning himself a chair shot to the head.

Sarge is given Lex Luger on Thunder and Goldberg tonight.

The Harris Brother eat sandwiches because that’s a thing that actually exists in wrestling. We cut to the Filthy Animals, who put laxatives in said sandwiches.

Steiner promises to knock down anyone Flair sets up for him.

AWALL is ready and Morrus is fine with a war against Shane Douglas. Lash is facing Shane tonight but he’s using some of Chavo’s lines to Hugh’s annoyance.

Mike Sanders vs. Sid Vicious

Sanders is in street clothes and says he’s not medically cleared to wrestle. Not that it matters as Sid, also in street clothes, chokeslams and powerbombs him for the pin in about a minute.

Sid says the sucka ain’t got no class. Tony: “What is he talking about?”

Post break, Sid attacks a parking lot attendant and demands the keys to all the cars.

Kronik beats Reno down until Vito tries to make a save. The rest of the Thrillers come in to beat him down but Kronik isn’t cool because they thought Reno was a Thriller. Apparently there’s a tag match at Starrcade.

Insiders vs. Perfect Event vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Non-title and the announcers talk about the Harris Twins’ sandwiches during the entrances. Nash, O’Haire and Palumbo and it’s Kevin getting superkicked a few seconds in. Stevie: “What does he call that kick?” Tony: “The Jungle Kick.” Stevie: “……ok.” Nash clotheslines them down and tags Page in for the house cleaning. Jindrak and Stasiak come in and beat Page down as well but Nash quickly comes back in for the real destruction. Palumbo gets jackknifed but Jindrak takes Nash down to set up a Seanton Bomb. Now it’s Page coming in with a Diamond Cutter on Jindrak, only to have Stasiak hit Page with a belt for the pin.

Rating: D. So to recap: Nash and Page were against four young guys, all of whom are either current or former Tag Team Champions and it took a belt shot to finally put them away. As we’ve firmly established, these stories are designed to make the older generation look good at the expense of the next generation. I don’t know how this benefits anyone but Page and Nash but I can’t wait for them to get the titles back on Sunday and set things right with the world.

The Thrillers worked over Nash’s knee during the break.

Sid is moving cars around in the parking lot.

Sgt. Dewayne Bruce vs. Goldberg

Goldberg doesn’t know who he’s facing because Jindrak and O’Haire took his monitor earlier in the night. Bruce says they have to do this even though Goldberg doesn’t want to do it. Cue Luger to say to say it’s Goldberg’s career if he doesn’t fight here. Goldberg tries to leave anyway but Sarge hits him in the back. Goldberg still won’t fight back until it’s a spear to put him down. There’s no Jackhammer though so Sarge grabs his leg and demands it. Goldberg grants the request and it’s 30-0.

Sarge is carried out on Goldberg’s shoulder.

Jamie Noble asks Kwee Wee, Paisley and Meng for advice on how to deal with Evan Karagias. Evan runs in to say they all have to come see what Sid is doing in the parking lot.

Shane Douglas vs. Lash Leroux

Before the match, Shane rants about how he’s stuck here without Torrie because of what Morrus did. Lash takes him down in a hurry and pounds away at Shane’s head before a snap suplex gets two. A suicide dive sends Shane into the barricade and it’s time to fight by the table. This has been all Lash so far and the announcers don’t sound very surprised. Back in and Shane grabs a powerslam but it’s a double clothesline to put them both down. Cue Chavo to offer Lash a chair but the distraction lets Shane load up the chain. Lash hits Shane with the chair though and that’s a quick DQ.

Shane lays him out with the chain so here’s Morrus for the save and some yelling at Chavo.

One of the Harris Twins has a stomach ache.

Sid is still playing with the cars.

Mike Awesome is ready for his ambulance match with Bam Bam Bigelow at Starrcade. Thankfully he says he’s ready for the Career Killer to come back so maybe That 70s Guy is dead.

Jarrett and company are ready for Sunday but one of the Twins isn’t looking so good. Tony finds this HILARIOUS.

Jeff Jarrett/Harris Twins vs. Filthy Animals

Elimination rules and it’s Konnan/Kidman/Mysterio. We’re not quite ready to go yet though as both Twins run to the back for some, ahem, relief. Konnan gets in an X Factor on Jarrett to start but the other Animals try to come in, allowing Jeff to get in a Stroke on Konnan for the elimination. Jeff’s music is quickly cut off because this match MUST CONTINUE! You know, because those are the rules.

Kidman snaps Jeff’s throat across the top rope for two but Jarrett suplexes Rey with one arm. A powerbomb plants Rey again but not before he tags Kidman in for a missile dropkick. The baseball slide low blow and the Bronco Buster have Jeff in trouble but the referee gets bumped. Jeff guitars Kidman but Rey springboards in with a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: D-. This is a confusing one as it was fun while it lasted but I’d like to repeat the fact that the Harris Twins were out early because of an overdose of laxatives. Also you would think this match would be the big payoff on Sunday but why do that when you can have another hardcore match? The wrestling was actually good here but the story just crippled it, as is so often the case around here.

Video on Starrcade’s main events.

Sid almost has the ring of cars ready.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Sgt. AWALL

Steiner is defending. Before the match, Steiner says Flair needs to thank Anderson for changing his mind about stripping the title. Steiner, in his deadly purple trunks, pounds AWALL down to start and we’re already seeming to be in squash territory. The comeback is quickly cut off with a belly to belly for two before Steiner throws him over the top. AWALL throws him over the barricade to put Steiner in trouble, setting up a powerslam for two back inside. A chokeslam looks to finish but AWALL would rather mess with the stupid table. That earns him a suplex through the table (good riddance) and the Recliner retains the title.

Rating: D. I can’t stand it when people do stupid things like AWALL messing with the table. It really does make these people look like the biggest morons in the world while also enforcing that relaxed rules nonsense. Even the WWF at the peak of its madness had some rules but this is basically ECW on a bigger stage which really doesn’t work.

Steiner chokes AWALL with the pipe until Sid gets up on screen and says since they can’t fight in the arena, come fight him in the parking lot. Scott heads outside to find a ring of cars ready for the fight because Sid may not be able to talk, but he can certainly park cars. After busting out a windshield for fun, Steiner hits Sid in the ribs with the pipe but has to fight out of a powerbomb. Steiner rams Sid’s head into the top of a car to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Bad wrestling, bad storytelling leading into bad matches and bad everything else (save for a decent angle with Goldberg not wanting to fight his mentor). This was a show that didn’t make me want to watch Starrcade but made me not want to watch WCW again. I know the running joke is that WCW was an old folks’ home but that’s exactly what we’re getting here. The biggest show of the year has three major matches and the only one with someone young is designed to make Nash and Page look good. It really is all about the old guard as we head into Starrcade near an all time low for the company.

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Monday Nitro – November 6, 2000: Well, It Didn’t Suck

Monday Nitro #265
Date: November 6, 2000
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson

It’s a new month for Nitro and hopefully things stay on the good path that Thunder put WCW on. The big story is Scott Steiner vs. Booker T. for the World Title in a few weeks at Mayhem but unfortunately we have a lot of TV left for them to screw up. We also have a new boss in Ric Flair, who wasn’t even on Thunder. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on Ric Flair returning and the Stasiak turn, followed by Steiner vs. Booker.

Earlier today, Midajah distracted an arriving Sting (head to toe in red) so Steiner could attack him. Buff Bagwell made the save.

The Thrillers talk about putting Jeff Jarrett in a tag match for no apparent reason.

Here’s Lex Luger, the hometown boy, to open things up. Instead of getting in the ring he goes over the announcers’ table and asks Mark Madden to stand up. Apparently Madden insulted Luger’s body last week despite being in horrible condition and having no business to talk about anyone. That’s about it, save for the other announcers ripping on Madden a little bit.

Luger gets inside and talks about all the big names that have been around this company over the years before getting to Goldberg. That Streak isn’t happening again because someone like Luger isn’t going to let that happen. They’ll be meeting at Mayhem and that Streak is already going to be history.

It also seems that Goldberg has been working on a book for eighteen months. Now after Luger got over the shock of finding out that he meant writing it, he was lucky enough to get his hands on a chapter. Lex calls up one of the writers from WCW Magazine, who says there’s nothing in the magazine about Luger himself. As you would expect, Luger beats the guy down and racks him. I get the idea here but Luger wasn’t exactly the best talker.

Goldberg arrives.

The guy from WCW Magazine was taken away on a stretcher.

Nash and the Thrillers look through Goldberg’s book before saying the Thrillers are now down a member. That makes them a better team though because Stasiak was making a bunch of crazy statements like wanting to be a World Champion. You know who should be a champion? Kevin Nash, who wants Booker tonight. Stasiak comes in and begs to be on the team again but is brushed off. He promises to be there for the team tonight.

Lance Storm vs. Kwee Wee

Before the match, Storm tells us to not vote because we all lose due to being Americans. Madden thinks Storm won’t want to fight Kwee Wee due to all the glitter. Tony almost calls Ric Flair the WWF CEO because he’d rather work for the other company too. Storm jumps Kwee Wee during the entrance as Paisley is on commentary. They get inside with Kwee Wee hitting a high cross body for two, followed by a tilt-a-whirl into a reverse sitout powerbomb for the same. A quick spinebuster sets up the Maple Leaf to make Kwee Wee tap.

Post match the Canadians keep the hold on so Paisley calls out Code Blue. This apparently means Meng who comes out for the save. Now wouldn’t Meng have been a more interesting option than Rection over and over?

Goldberg is ready for Bam Bam Bigelow tonight and isn’t worried about Luger either. Cue Luger to list off his resume but it’s a ruse for Bigelow to attack.

Now we get to another sad moment on the show as Tony brings up Battledome. What’s Battledome you ask? It’s an American Gladiators ripoff with WWF elements added including characters and storylines etc (along with Terry Crews as one of the Warriors). It was a pretty low budget show but I always had a good time with it, albeit partially because I was twelve years old. The idea of putting it together with wrestling was awesome at the time but looking back now it’s just sad.

Anyway Tony and company talk about how lame it is that the Battledome guys are to challenge WCW wrestlers to a fight. This led to a brawl on Battledome with Diamond Dallas Page and Cat with Page stealing their Warriors title belt (yeah they had a title belt) and spitting on it. This is actually worse than I remember.

Hardcore Title: Shawn Stasiak vs. Reno

Reno is defending and I suppose this is Stasiak’s punishment. Just like last week on Thunder, there’s no opponent for Stasiak though as we see Reno down in the back. Apparently Reno is still champion though because it wasn’t a pinfall or a submission.

Nash and the Thrillers look at Reno, who says more than one person was behind this.

Here’s Ric Flair with something to say. Flair sucks up to the Chicago crowd and says it’s time to change this company for the better. As for Mayhem, we’ll be seeing Rection vs. Storm for the US Title for the last time, along with Goldberg vs. Lex Luger. That only leaves Flair with the World Title and it doesn’t matter if it’s Scott Steiner or Booker T. because both of them will be walking into a cage at Mayhem. However, Steiner needs to behave himself better because it’s time to be a man around here.

Cue Steiner to get right in Flair’s face and grab him by the lapel. This brings out Booker to clean house in very short order. Steiner is taken out so Flair makes the cage match a straitjacket cage match, meaning a straitjacket is above the ring though you still win by pinfall or submission. Flair still isn’t done yet though and says if Steiner touches any non-wrestler, he’s out of this company.

Jimmy Hart has gotten some responses from various DJ’s for his fight. As soon as he says Howard Stern, it’s clear that this isn’t exactly on the up and up. Mancow comes in (Wearing a Creed shirt. Yeah there are going to be jokes but I was a fan.) because this is STILL a thing. A fight nearly breaks out with Mancow running his mouth until 3 Count comes in to beat him down.

Tag Team Titles: Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire vs. 3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

Jindrak/O’Haire are defending against Moore/Helms and Yang/Hayashi respectfully. The challengers all brawl to start but the champs him the ring and start cleaning house. They stop to pose though and Hayashi slingshots in with a DDT while Yang comes off the top with a good looking headscissors. Now it’s Jindrak and O’Haire getting double teamed in a smart move from two teams that can’t stand each other.

Yang stops a comeback with a double poke to the eyes as the champs bail to the floor. They’re in good enough shape to catch the Dragons as they come over the top, including the beal from the floor on Yang. Helms gives Jindrak the Nightmare on Helms Street (Final Cut) but Evan Karagias runs in for the save. O’Haire comes off the top with the Seanton Bomb to give Jindrak the easy pin.

Rating: C+. This is easily the highlight of the week time after time and most of it is because they’re just letting the people do their thing. It’s very similar to what the cruiserweights did back in the day: have meaningless matches to pop the crowd before everyone else screws things up.

Post match the Battledome Warriors appear (off camera that is) to yell at Jindrak and O’Haire. At the same time the unmasked Jamie-San comes in and chairs the Dragons. Jamie and Evan stare each other down.

Diamond Dallas Page is back after several months away and Hudson is WAY too excited. Page talks about having a non-televised match about four months against WCW World Champion Booker T. It was that moment that he realized how negative a person he’d become. Then he heard the crowd popping louder than they have in a long time and it made him realize how happy he is with this job and this life. Now he’s back to have the time of his life thanks to a call from Flair.

Page says he’s back and does the usual celebrating but he stops to yell at the Battledome guys. He calls out some boys from the back so here are Buff Bagwell, Cat and Rick Steiner for a showdown. All of them talk trash and a brawl breaks out. This would lead to Steiner showing up on Battledome to compete in a game.

Stasiak says he had nothing to do with attacking Reno.

Buff Bagwell/Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner

Jeff and Buff get things going as the announcers get on Madden for suggesting that Steiner could kill a fan. Bagwell gets in a quick swinging neckbreaker and it’s off to Sting vs. Steiner. A belly to belly suplex sends Sting flying and the heels take over with Jeff coming in for a middle rope elbow. It’s already back to Steiner to crank on Sting’s arms as they’re certainly not going anything beyond average so far.

Jeff gets caught in a sunset flip with Buff adding in a right hand to knock him backwards, only to have Steiner take over again. A DDT on Scott allows the hot tag to Bagwell and everything breaks down. Sting and Jarrett fight to the floor as Buff gets in a Blockbuster on Steiner, only to eat a guitar shot. The Recliner puts Bagwell away.

Rating: D+. It’s your standard main event tag formula but of course the match was short and had a weapon spot because it’s not like this was something that could have gone through clean. Bagwell not being on this level didn’t do him any favors either but I’m really not sure why Sting and Jarrett are STILL fighting. Isn’t that story done yet?

US Title: Alex Wright vs. General Rection

Wright is challenging and Lance Storm is on commentary. Before the match, Wright speaks German and Disco gives a questionable translation though there’s no big punchline at the end. Rection takes him into the corner before catching a charge in a powerslam. The fans sound like they want to see Gunns’ puppies as Rection gets two off a legdrop. Madden: “Legdrop never wins anymore.”

Wright gets in a spinwheel kick to take over but it’s time for dancing. An impressive slam sets up a Vader bomb for two on the champ and a top rope stomp (might have been a botch) gets the same. Disco tries to get in a chair shot so here’s the MIA for the save. A splash in the corner sets up No Laughing Matter to retain Rection’s title.

Rating: D. Rection really isn’t very good. They’re trying something with the US Title push but there comes a point where that’s not going to get you far enough. Wright was a good challenger but at the end of the day, there’s only so much you can do with what you’re being given.

Jim Duggan says America sucks because it doesn’t work.

Booker will defend against Kevin Nash tonight but he’s also ready for Mayhem.

Goldberg vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

We get the full Goldberg entrance and his right leg is heavily taped. Bigelow is right on him to start with an early splash as Madden thinks the taped leg might be injured. He’s not sure of course. Cue Luger as Goldberg is in trouble early on. A single right hand sends Bigelow flying across the ring but a Luger distraction lets Bam Bam get in a belly to back. There’s the top rope headbutt for two so Goldberg pops up for the two moves and the pin.

We come back from a break with Steiner ranting a lot before joining commentary for the main event.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Booker T.

Nash is challenging of course. Feeling out process to start with Nash getting the better of it off those big right hands to the head. They head outside for more punches before Booker gets in a chair shot to take over. Well that’s pretty heelish. Nash doesn’t bother selling it anyway though and kicks the champ in the face for two. Booker fights up again and gets the ax kick, only to have another kick hit the referee by mistake. Cue Shawn Stasiak with brass knuckles to knock Booker out but then he knocks Nash out too (duh), giving Booker the pin to retain.

Rating: D-. Just a bunch of punches and kicks before all the screwy stuff that makes sure they both look equally weak. Booker is turning into a lame duck champion in a hurry as he hasn’t looked strong in weeks. If you don’t want your champion to be strong, it’s probably time to find a new champion. Then again they haven’t exactly been going out of their way to hide what Steiner is getting at the pay per view.

Steiner grabs Booker to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Well it didn’t suck and that’s a step in the right direction for WCW. There isn’t much to say here as we’re coming up on Mayhem and the shows aren’t looking great but at least they’re coherent and seemingly going somewhere. It should probably be Goldberg vs. Steiner for the title at Starrcade (which is next month) but that stupid Streak thing is getting in their way. If only there was a way to change things in wrestling with almost no ramifications. Anyway, another not awful show here and that’s an improvement.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro – October 30, 2000: So That’s Why He’s There

Monday Nitro #264
Date: October 30, 2000
Location: Bren Events Center, Irvine, California
Commentators: Mark Madden, Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone

We’re past Halloween Havoc and as you might expect, WCW managed to screw up what should have been a pretty easy show. Booker T. is still the World Champion after Scott Steiner got disqualified, meaning tonight it’s Booker defending against Mike Awesome in a match I’m sure will happen as advertised. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last night’s results, thankfully omitting the Sting Army.

Someone is here in a white limo.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Kidman/Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Jindrak and O’Haire are defending and we hear about a new CEO arriving tonight. So what was the point of having two guys fight over being Commissioner for so long? I’m assuming we can add that to the list of stories that go nowhere and mean nothing. Konnan sits in on commentary, which could be a lot more entertaining than it has any right to be. Rey slaps Jindrak in the face to start as Konnan talks about an article on Jindrak’s high school sports career.

Kidman comes in and stomps Jindrak in the corner until it’s off to O’Haire for a hard shot to the face. A blind tag brings in Rey with a springboard sunset flip but Sean drops him with a slingshot sitout powerbomb. That great looking springboard clothesline gives Jindrak a near fall as well but Rey comes back with a hurricanrana out of the corner. The hot tag brings in Kidman to clean house as everything breaks down. The BK Bomb drops Jindrak to set up the Nutcracker Supreme, followed by a botched count as the Boogie Knights are late running in. Disco gets in a Last Dance, giving O’Haire the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. As usual this company does much better when they just let the wrestlers wrestle. There were too many botches in here to really have it work but putting Jindrak and O’Haire out there with guys like Mysterio and Kidman is only going to do good things for them. Hopefully these matches are signs of the future instead of signs that Jindrak and O’Haire are being carried.

Mike Sanders is in the back with Kevin Nash when Scott Steiner comes up and demands a title match tonight. That’s fine with Mike so Scott leaves. Kevin tells Sanders to pick his battles.

Hardcore Title: Reno vs. Kwee Wee

Reno is defending after beating Kwee Wee last week but Rolling the Dice on Paisley after the match. Before the match, Kwee Wee talks about beating up Reno in the Power Plant and not wanting to be one of the Natural Born Ratings Killers. I’ll never get used to this meta nonsense. Kwee Wee starts in with some trashcan shots and a sunset flip on the floor for two as the announcers talk about Steiner.

The fans want tables as the champ starts swinging a kendo stick to take over. Kwee Wee gets in a few more shots and they head up the ramp, only to have the Thrillers come out and beat him down. The big toss from O’Haire and Jindrak sends Kwee Wee flying back inside, setting up the Roll of the Dice onto a trashcan lid to retain Reno’s title.

Rating: D. One guy hit the other one with weapons and then the other guy hit the first one with weapons, followed by the Thrillers coming out to make this nothing. You would think they would be out there at the bell since there were no rules but that might make too much sense. I like the idea that Kwee Wee was in the Power Plant class with these guys but doesn’t want to side with them but the gimmick is making this more of a joke than anything else.

Here’s General Rection to talk about how proud he is of winning the title but has to call out the Misfits, including Major Gunns back in the camouflage. After a bunch of hugs, Rection rips the Canadian sticker off and makes it the US Title again. He dedicates this to all the C team players like Konnan and Mysterio (Really? They’re C team? What’s the B team then?) who never get a chance to show what they can do.

Gene starts the slow clap for Rection and the roster comes out to applaud for him. Even Booker and Goldberg, the latter of whom says he appreciates Hugh (yes Hugh) make appearances. You know what might make this better? Renaming the champ Bill DeMott. This was quite a moment but it’s really hard to get fired up for someone named General Rection.

We’re not done yet as Lance Storm pops up on screen to say Rection never beat him for that title. If Rection is man enough, he’ll give Storm another shot at that title. Rection is one step ahead of him as he’s already had the rematch made and signed (complete with a contract) for Mayhem. Goldberg tells Hugh to shut Storm up. This was a lot better than I was expecting and felt like a really strong rub, assuming he doesn’t drop the title soon.

Here’s David Flair with the DNA testing results, which say Buff Bagwell is NOT the father. You know, which you can get in less than 24 hours. Cue MI Smooth (Madden: “You ever notice he looks like an inflated Cuba Gooding Jr.?”) to say he has a bone to pick with David. Apparently Smooth never told him that Buff was the dad and David just jumped to that conclusion.

David Flair vs. MI Smooth

Smooth destroys him as you would expect and we get a Flair Flip in the corner. David’s sunset flip only gets two and it’s a Bubba Bomb to put David away in a hurry.

Jimmy Hart issues an open challenge to wrestle any radio DJ. Oh sweet goodness wasn’t Mancow enough?

Here are the Boogie Knights with something to say. Disco: “I’m not entirely sure why we’re out here.” Apparently Sanders sent them out here, perhaps to praise their abdominal development. This brings out Goldberg to easily toss the two of them over the top and take their mic. Goldberg didn’t know who he was until a few weeks ago but now adversity has introduced him to himself. After last night, Kronik knows who he is to. The record is just a number and now everyone in the back is next. You would think they could have had him beat the Knights to get two more wins here.

The new CEO comes out of his office and we look at his feet. Since this is WCW though, the camera is looking up and has to pan down quickly so we see the new boss’ face.

Here’s Mike Sanders in a suit with something to say. Sanders brags about his win last night, including bragging about knocking out the Cat for the 1-2-3. Actually it was a 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10 because it was a countout but close enough I guess. That brings him to business though as the World Title match is now going to be Booker defending against Awesome and Steiner. As for the CEO, all he’s going to run is around getting Sanders coffee. This new CEO is going to drop out of WCW faster than Shawn Stasiak drops out of a spelling bee.

Cue Ric Flair, who we saw earlier. You would think they would edit these things to make sure they don’t give away the big moment of the night but that’s too low brow for them I guess. Flair has been watching Sanders lately and he’s impressed by what he sees. However, Sanders and the rest of the Thrillers are going to start playing by the rules or they’re not going to play at all.

Mike gets sent out but first of all, Flair is going to have him fight the Cat again tonight and it’s going to be by the rules. That brings us back to last night and we’ll start with Lex Luger. Ric asked Luger to watch out for his boy but Luger went a bit too far. Buff Bagwell is owed an apology but it seems that Luger is back.

This brings out Jeff Jarrett, who has to find a working mic. Jarrett thinks Ric Flair is going to be around until after civilization ends (not that far off actually). Flair: “The only time you’re the chosen one is when you’re in a room full of girls.” They threaten each other a bit and Flair keeps insisting that he’s retired. I’ll believe any of this will mean something when I actually see it happen.

Here’s Lex Luger with something to say. Last night Ric made him an offer: take care of David and he’ll be back full time. Luger brags about all his accomplishments and his bank account before saying last night with Buff was just business. Tonight though he wants to make an announcement: he’s next. For Goldberg that is. Buff comes out and fumbles over his challenge to Luger, setting up a match for later. Actually Buff has a referee here with him just in case so let’s do it right now.

Lex Luger vs. Buff Bagwell

Buff starts with that double arm DDT but the Blockbuster hits the referee by mistake. Luger uses the distraction to get in some chair shots, setting up the Rack for the quick win. It amazes me how Buff continues to be treated as such a nothing guy. He’s kind of the Dolph Ziggler of his day.

Shawn Stasiak promises loyalty to the Thrillers. Nash gives Palumbo and Stasiak a quick spanking and offers to let Pamela give him one.

Kronik vs. Perfect Event

Nash sits in on commentary. Stasiak actually knocks Adams into the corner to start as a loud WE WANT SCOTT HALL chant breaks out. It’s off to Clark to stomp Palumbo down in the corner and Stasiak gets knocked out to the floor. Nash: “Walk it off kid.” That sends Stasiak off to the back as the full nelson slam plants Palumbo. High Times puts Palumbo away.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as the dull Shawn Stasiak face turn continues, even though I have little reason to believe that he’s actually going to turn as WCW is likely to make it a SWERVE. There wasn’t much to the match of course but that’s what you have to expect from a Perfect Event match.

Post break Nash leads the Thrillers to find Stasiak.

Booker isn’t worried about having two challengers at once. Steiner cheated to get where he is while Awesome won his shot fair and square.

The Cat vs. Mike Sanders

Before the match, Cat says he saw Maddenin the shower earlier today. Hudson: “What was he doing watching you in the shower?” Sanders asks for a handshake but it’s a chop to the chest instead. Cat starts hammering away in the corner before they head outside, allowing Madden to rant about how much he hates Cat because Madden looks GREAT in said shower. Back in and Mike puts on a chinlock for a bit before Cat fights up with his dancing elbow. A quick Feliner gives Cat the pin in a hurry.

Post match Shane Douglas pops up on screen and says Cat needs to worry about his own house. The camera pans over to Ms. Jones, who gets a backbreaker for slapping Shane in the face.

Cat is livid post break.

Mike Awesome likes the idea of Steiner being in the main event and suggests an alliance to take Steiner out.

WCW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Booker T. vs. Scott Steiner

Booker is defending. Before the match Steiner rants about how he should have won last week and got ripped off anyway. Booker limps out to the ring and Mike couldn’t feel more added on if he was a free toaster for opening a bank account. Steiner and Booker start fighting before Awesome comes out and Booker hits a quick sidekick to take over. Mike finally comes out maybe two minutes in and it’s time to clean house. Awesome’s flying shoulder gets two on Booker but Steiner comes back in with his belly to belly.

The elbow into the pushups have Booker in trouble but Awesome goes up for a clothesline. The Awesome Splash gets two on Steiner until Booker gets in a side kick to put everyone down. Booker is up first, only to get suplexed by Steiner. Scott beats on the champ outside until Awesome gets in a chair shot. Back in and Scott gets two off the super Angle Slam and there’s the Recliner, only to have Booker kick Steiner in the face. The Bookend to Awesome retains the title.

Rating: D+. Ah so Awesome was put in there as a jobber. I have a hard time believing that WCW planned this all the way back in Australia but it’s a better idea than they have most of the time. The problem here continues to be that Steiner is a fairly one note character who is doing what he can but it’s now more of a matter of time until he gets the title, which makes a lot of these shows feel unimportant.

Steiner has to be held back by security. Booker issues a challenge for him at some point in the future because the fans want to see it.

Overall Rating: D. It’s still a bad show but they got rid of a lot of the stuff that really slowed things down, such as Jeff Jarrett, Shane Douglas wrestling and the Thrillers looking like morons. As we’ve covered multiple times, a lot of the wrestlers just really aren’t that good right now. The stories are trying but there’s only so far guys like Lex Luger, David Flair and an old Scott Steiner can take you.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Halloween Havoc 2000: There It Is

Halloween Havoc 2000
Date: October 29, 2000
Location: MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 7,582
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

It’s at least a double main event tonight and you could argue a triple with Kronik vs. Goldberg, Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett and Booker T. defending the World Title against Scott Steiner. After that though the card falls off a cliff and hits every single rock on the way down. Let’s get to it.

We open with the fans being polled about the handicap match. Well to be fair that’s cheaper and safer than asking the announcers what they think.

The regular opening video focuses on how everyone needs to overcome their fears.

Tony: “This is sports entertainment!”

Tag Team Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Rey Mysterio/Kidman vs. Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak

O’Haire and Jindrak are defending after losing to both teams in recent weeks. The Thrillers come out second for no logical reason but I’m sure it’s supposed to draw money or humble them or something. The ring has the Backstage Assault (WCW video game sponsoring the show) logos in each corner. Konnan is on commentary as Alex, Mark and Kidman are in to start. I’ve always liked that three men in at once rule in WCW.

Kidman headscissors Mark down and hits a nice dropkick before it’s off to Rey, whose Bronco Buster hits a raised boot. Disco comes in and dances but Jindrak springboards in so high that Disco has to take a step back before Jindrak hits him. O’Haire throws Rey into the air for a powerslam (cool spot) so Disco helps double team him down, only to start fighting with Rey over the cover. Kidman comes in and elbows Disco instead of O’Haire, only to have Wright dropkick Kidman for two.

The fans stay on Disco as Wright knees Jindrak in the arm for two (well done camera guys). The yet to be named Tower of Doom freaks Stevie out as Wright is planted for a double two count. Konnan is already getting on my nerves with his Natural Born Cranberries line and we get a triple tag to bring in Rey, Disco and O’Haire. Everything breaks down and Kidman takes the double beal over the top from the floor.

O’Haire throws Rey over the top into a belly to belly from Wright for two. The Animals take over for a bit and Wright takes a Kid Crusher but the champs make a save. Wright runs into Rey and falls over the top anyway, leaving Disco to Last Dance Jindrak. Stevie sounds like he’s doing a JR impression for reasons that aren’t clear, only to have O’Haire hit the Seanton Bomb for the pin on Disco to retain.

Rating: B-. This was a lot of fun as they just let all six of them go nuts for ten minutes to fire up the crowd. I like the idea of a hot opener and given that they probably don’t have much left on the show worth much until the last three matches, this was a good choice to have early on the card.

Post match Wright beats down the Animals with a chair so Konnan comes in, drawing in Sgt. AWOL for the save for absolutely no logical reason. Konnan looks hurt and comes up limping.

Hardcore Title: Reno vs. Sgt. AWOL

AWOL is challenging so he sets up a table in between matches. Reno hits him with a kendo stick but takes a boot to the face (totally missed), only to flapjack AWOL through the table for two. Madden says old school hardcore rules are in effect: pinfalls count anywhere and anything goes. That would be different than the new rules of start in the back and end in the ring. So there are two eras for a title not even a year old?

A trashcan shot to the head gets two on AWOL as I have flashbacks to him being invincible just about a year ago. AWOL comes back by putting a trashcan over Reno’s head before kicking the can rather hard. Not the part with Reno inside of course because that might mean something looks good in this match.

AWOL and Stevie Ray do a Too Sweet for some reason before the guys walk up the aisle. A Roll of the Dice on the ramp knocks AWOL silly but let’s set up two tables instead of covering. As expected, AWOL gets up and throws Reno through both tables (or at least most of them). That’s not enough for a cover either so they head backstage with AWOL throwing a computer monitor at Reno’s head. Ignore the picture on the monitor that isn’t plugged in because this is OLD SCHOOL HARDCORE, meaning technology doesn’t have to make sense.

The champ blasts him with a fire extinguisher and throws AWOL through another table, only to have AWOL throw him onto another table. Madden makes jokes about the internet ruining wrestling as AWOL hits him with the monitor again. AWOL hits agent Fit Finlay and Madden gets in what sounds like an inside joke that makes no sense unless you were probably in catering that day. Back to ringside and AWOL loads up another table, only to walk into Roll of the Dice to retain Reno’s title.

Rating: D-. WAY too long here as I was begging for this to be over nearly halfway through. This gimmick is so beyond dead and now the match is getting nearly eleven minutes (third longest match of the night) on a card with ten other matches. Who is this supposed to appeal to? I hit you with some object, we do a table spot, repeat five times? That’s the best they’ve got?

Post match the Perfect Event comes out and beats on AWOL, drawing out Lieutenant Loco and Corporal Cajun to give us a very lame reaction.

Shane Douglas talks to the Thrillers and tells them that Nash has put him in charge of the team tonight. Nash can’t even show up on pay per views now?

Apparently Goldberg was injured when he hit the post on Thunder. He isn’t here yet but that’s commonplace in WCW.

Kronik talks to the Nevada State Wrestling Commission and mentions Goldberg having a head/neck injury.

Lieutenant Loco/Corporal Cajun vs. Perfect Event

This is an impromptu match but luckily the Thrillers were already in their gear. Why Loco and Cajun had to go to the back and come back out isn’t clear. Stasiak gets beaten down to start and you can see people getting out of their chairs. It’s also clear that the cameras aren’t panning over to the side because there are A LOT of empty seats that keep sneaking into view.

Things settle down to Stasiak beating on Loco before it’s off to Palumbo. The announcers argue over how together the Perfect Event is, despite the fact that they’re not even the best team in their own stable. Palumbo charges into Cajun’s raised boot as I have no idea why this match is taking place on pay per view. Was a ten match card really not enough? A double flapjack puts Loco down as Stevie thinks Madden called Loco “Chubby Toes.”

Stasiak gets two off a sitout powerbomb (Tony: “Out of the Coach Kevin Nash playbook!”) as the announcers talk about how many saves you’re allowed to make in tag team wrestling. Apparently there used to be a limit on that. You would think that some company like Ring of Honor might have brought that back over the years. Loco somehow spins out of a press slam and it’s off to Cajun with the hot tag.

Palumbo makes the save so Stasiak can get two and the fans are put right back in their seats. Well the fans that are still in the arena at least. A sleeper makes things even worse but Cajun fights out….and is put in another sleeper. Well Palumbo’s hand is over Cajun’s eyes so it’s more like a one man game of Peek-A-Boo. Cajun escapes again and runs him over for the tag to Loco but the fans aren’t bothering to get fired up this time. Everything breaks down and Loco gives Stasiak a quick tornado DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. It was a watchable match that I’m going to forget about inside of the next ten minutes and really only served to further the “Stasiak is a screwup” story, which isn’t interesting in the first place because IT’S SHAWN STASIAK. You could have easily cut this from the show and given the time to other matches and given how fast the fans were leaving, there’s probably something to that idea.

Konnan is hurt but is willing to go fight anyway.

Torrie Wilson/Shane Douglas vs. Konnan/Tygress

You can see Stasiak and Palumbo leaving the ring as Shane’s entrance comes on. Torrie is in a Wonder Woman swimsuit and the announcers trip over each others tongues to oogle her. Before the match, Shane laughs at Konnan’s injuries and offers Tygress a chance to come out here and get beaten up. Or sexually assaulted if you pay attention to what he says.

Tygress fights on her own to start by kicking Shane low, setting up a HORRIBLE sequence between the women. Shane breaks up the Bronco Buster as the announcers talk about Torrie’s stockings. A double Franchiser is loaded up but Konnan comes in through the crowd for no apparent reason for the save. His back is fine enough to clothesline both of them down and we get a horrible looking double baseball slide as everything heads outside.

It settles down into a regular match and Tony freaks out when Tygress grabs a wristlock on Shane. Torrie tries to make a save and has no idea what to do (makes sense) so Shane takes over on Tygress to save himself. It’s off to Torrie for a really awkward looking run across the ring (with no complaints from the announcers), followed by a camel clutch from Shane.

Off to a crossface chickenwing with Shane putting her hand near his crotch (and shouting something about “make me feel good baby”) until Tygress escapes and crawls over for a hot tag to Konnan. Everything breaks down and Torrie pulls the referee into the path of a Bronco Buster for the comedy spot of the match. Torrie gives Konnan a decent Franchiser for two but the good team gives Shane a double facebuster for the pin.

Rating: D-. Other than Torrie in that outfit, this did not need to be on pay per view. This needed to be about five minutes shorter and on Nitro, mainly because I have no idea why this match even took place. Something about who is the best couple, but isn’t Tygress with Rey? They made it clear that this was all about looking at Torrie but there are other ways to do that without wasting over ten minutes of pay per view time.

Again the camera immediately cuts away to the next interview. What’s up with them wanting to get away from Tygress and Torrie so fast? Anyway David Flair and his doctors (they have stethoscopes and stuff) are ready to prove that Buff is a lying piece of garbage.

Buff Bagwell vs. David Flair

This is a DNA match and we’re still waiting on a definition of what that is. Madden: “Tony what are the rules of a DNA match?” Hey thanks Mark. It means First Blood, though I don’t think the fans have actually been told that otherwise. Before the match, Buff promises that he’ll win. You can add that to the long list of things that could have been cut from this show.

Buff punches David down to start and scores with a swinging neckbreaker. All Buff so far as this is a total squash since David still isn’t much of a wrestler. David does the Flair Flip in the corner but gets slammed down just like his daddy. Buff rips the shirt off and makes him do a double bicep pose, allowing David to kick him low for his first advantage. Outside they go but Buff can’t get a piledriver on the exposed concrete because that might kill him.

Your comment of the show that sums up how stupid this whole thing is: Tony: “David trying to bust Buff open and get a DNA sample!” Just imagine a non-fan hearing that one line and see how they react. Anyway they get back in and David tries a chair, only to get hit low and hit with the chair instead. David is busted open so the match is over but since the wrestlers don’t seem to know how the match works, Buff gives him a Blockbuster anyway.

Rating: D-. This was a squash and another match that didn’t need to be on a pay per view. The DNA story is interesting enough but does anyone really care about David Flair? Buff would be a better person in this role, especially since Ric has barely been a factor in it most of the time. At least we got to see David beat up his mailman though. That’s something right?

Post match Lex Luger of all people comes out to celebrate with Buff and turn on him a full two seconds later. Luger posts Buff and busts open his lip, allowing David to get a sample. Boy that’s convenient.

Goldberg, looking a bit shaky, arrives. Thank goodness they made sure to fix that cliffhanger that started half an hour ago.

Scott Steiner and Midajah aren’t worried about Goldberg. Steiner promises to win the title.

The Cat vs. Mike Sanders

This is a kickboxing match for the Commissionership with three rounds lasting two minutes each. Both guys get to run their mouths to start and still nothing of note is said. Palumbo and Stasiak (fine again) are in Sanders’ corner as Madden thinks this is a karate match. They feel each other out for a bit until Cat kicks him in the head for an eight count. A legsweep drops Sanders and they lock up with about ten seconds to go to end the round.

Cat beats on him with ease for a knockdown and Sanders barely beats the count. Another punch drops Mike again but the Perfect Event argues over whether or not to throw in the towel. Mike says throw it in but somehow beats the count to end the round. This has been completely one sided so far and Cat has barely broken a sweat.

Stasiak and Palumbo get in a fight during the break but here’s Shane Douglas for some reason. The referee is outside yelling at the Thrillers as Cat beats up Sanders even more. Cat gets in a good looking cartwheel kick and Sanders doesn’t want to get up. With Mike kind of on his feet, Cat hammers away even more. To his credit though, he’s able to shout “GET THE CHAIN MAN!” to Douglas, who knocks Cat out with a chain a few seconds later.

The slowest ten count ever (the referee is at five with twenty seconds left and gets to nine with three seconds left) allows the Cat to get up just in time and the match continues. Cat knocks Sanders out again but goes to the floor to fight Shane, giving Mike a countout win. In overtime. In a kickboxing match. To be a wrestling commissioner. Which he already was.

Rating: F. There’s a difference between this kind of stuff and the kind of stuff you would see under full Russo control. While that stuff was really more about shock value and being as stupid as possible, this was a match where you knew everything that was going to happen from the second Shane came out (save for maybe the stupid countout ending). It’s still really bad either way but at least this had some great facial expressions from Sanders. Of course this was horrible but it’s not like the two of them could have a much better wrestling match.

Goldberg talks to the wrestling commissioners and says he’s fine from Monday. The injury was on Wednesday’s show but it was taped on Monday so I’m not sure if I can call that a botch or not.

Kronik gives Goldberg until the end of the night because they get paid either way.

Mike Awesome vs. Vampiro

Add this to the list of things that doesn’t really need to be on pay per view. Not the match that is but Mike as That 70s Guy. This is over Awesome beating Vampiro down a few weeks back so Vampiro is here for revenge. Odd heel motivation but whatever. Vampiro wants to put Awesome’s title shot on the line as well. Now that’s more like a heel. Mike says groovy. Well actually he says that’s fine but he should have said groovy.

Vampiro is knocked to the floor to start and a big plancha takes him down again. That never stops looking awesome. The brawl heads into the crowd despite there being regular rules for this one. Vampiro grabs a cane from someone and beats on Awesome, only to have the guy hit Awesome, who beats him down as a result. Well that was a bad moment.

Back in and they duel with chairs like samurai warriors according to Tony. I’d love to meet Tony’s history teacher if he thinks samurai’s fought with folding metal chairs. Vampiro gets the better of it and takes over with a release belly to belly superplex that almost had a horrible landing. Back in and Vampiro tries a top rope seated senton but Mike seems to counter into a sitout powerbomb. Well I think so at least because it looked kind of like a counter and kind of like Awesome fell backwards. Mike covered for two so we’ll go with horribly executed counter.

Instead it’s time for a table and even Stevie thinks there’s something wrong with this. The Nail in the Coffin gets no cover so let’s bring in another table. Madden: “There’s always room for jello and there’s always room for another table.” I saw Ghostbusters II first so I smiled at that line more than I should have. They head outside for an Awesome Bomb on the floor…for two? Are we having a second match where they don’t know the rules? Vampiro is up fast enough to break up the Awesome Splash. Instead it’s a Super Awesome Bomb to give Mike the pin and give us that sweet 70s music.

Rating: D. They had something there with the big spots but that doesn’t really work if the spots don’t actually work. Awesome and Vampiro were trying but there’s only so much you can do when the match is barely looking like a match and turns more into a trainwreck. It also didn’t help that they beat up a fan in the crowd. You know that whole assault thing.

General Rection gives a fired up promo talking about how he’s lost so much over the last few months but he’s here for one more fight.

Vampiro is being checked on by the trainers and gets a round of applause when he sits up. Tony shows us a replay and calls it one of the most amazing spots you’ll ever see. Who in the world is going to care if you call it a move? As usual it comes off like WCW trying to make themselves look smarter and forgetting that a lot of fans don’t care.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm/Jim Duggan

Storm is defending in a handicap match and goes on a rant about how Rection won’t just accept that he’s been beaten. Duggan argues with the referee over who gets to keep the board before locking up with Rection and brawling around the ring. Rection clears the ring with clotheslines before no selling Storm’s chops in the corner.

There’s a backdrop to send Lance outside but Duggan knocks Rection outside as well to take over for the first time. Stevie: “Tony, why do they call her Major Gunns?” The bad guys take over with Duggan elbowing him down to give Storm two. A superkick gets another delayed near fall but Duggan’s Three Point Clothesline is turned into a double clothesline to put both guys down.

Storm slaps on a sleeper and Stevie actually compares it to the one from the Perfect Event match. Who would have thought Stevie would be the best analyst between Tony and Mar…..this isn’t all that surprising actually. Canadian miscommunication gives Rection an opening and he powerslams Storm for one.

Duggan hits his partner by mistake again before the referee drops down as Lance runs the ropes. He does it a second time and then we get the ref bump because we needed a ref bump. Duggan piledrives Rection for no count so here’s Elix Skipper, who is quickly taken down by a flag shot from Gunns. Back in and a Russian legsweep to Duggan with the 2×4 (clearly not making any contact) is enough to set up the No Laughing Matter to give Rection the title.

Rating: D. I appreciate them trying to keep Storm strong but was this really the best idea they could come up with? Rection isn’t really the most interesting guy in the world but at least it fits the story they’ve built up for months. In a good company this would free Storm up for a main event run but you know WCW isn’t bright enough to pull that off.

Mayhem ad centered entirely around Scott Steiner.

Jarrett is ready for Sting.

We recap Jarrett vs. Sting which is over Jarrett claiming Sting has no heart. For some reason this resulted in him dressing up as Sting and mimicking him, which only served to tick Sting off and set up a big fight here. On paper, this should be a layup.

Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jeff goes around the ring running his mouth so Sting jumps him from behind to start things fast. They get inside with Sting hitting an atomic drop….and here comes Surfer Sting. The real Sting (Sting Prime?) beats him up as Madden wonders if you can get disqualified for beating yourself up. Fair question….I think? Sting and Jarrett fight by the stage and then into the crowd so here’s 1990 Sting to get beaten up as well. The real Sting gives him a Death Drop on the stage as Jarrett stands in the ring.

Back in and here’s Wolfpac Sting (possibly played by Chris Harris) as we skip eight years or so. For some reason Sting takes him up to the stage for some bat shots and another Death Drop. Jeff hits him in the neck/shoulder with the bat as the referee checks on Wolfpac Sting. Back in and Jeff puts on a sleeper, probably giving us the highlight of the match. Sting fights up and makes his comeback as Crow Sting breaks through the mat and pulls Sting under.

That earns Crow another beatdown but the lights go out and Crow Sting II repels from the ceiling. Sting gives him a Death Drop through the table to knock the wig off and reveal a bald spot. Back in and Sting puts on the Scorpion, only to have Crow Sting I hit him with the guitar. That’s no sold (why not at this point) and Crow I gets a Death Drop, followed by the guitar shot from Jeff for the pin.

Rating: T. For There it is. I had heard about how horrible this show was going to be. This match started roughly two hours in and while it was bad, there have been worse. Then there it was. There’s the big moment that turns this into horrible. WCW spent weeks building up a three match show and one of them involved Sting fighting the demons of his past because Jarrett apparently hired a bunch of guys to dress up like Sting and interfere at timed intervals.

Normally I would go into a big rant about why this is stupid but it’s up there with Mae Young giving birth to a hand or David Flair beating up a mailman on the list of things that speak for themselves. With WCW in the position they’re in, they have no business screwing over the fans on one of the only matches that was almost guaranteed to be well done. I mean, it wasn’t going to be a classic or anything but if you have Sting and Jarrett doing a mostly straight match, it’s going to be fine.

Instead of a match though, which is something the fans might be interested in based on how Russo’s TV ratings died over the summer, the company did some insane spectacle that might have made sense to three people in the building. The story of Sting needing to show heart is fine and Sting is the kind of guy who can pull that off but instead we get this mess with everyone being confused and annoyed. How this benefits anyone is beyond me but at least I have a reason to hate this show even more now.

Stevie Ray doesn’t help things here by talking about how Sting came up short after fighting off all those odds. As in an army of Sting clones is the same as Jimmy Hart distracting a referee.

Booker T. is ready for Steiner.

We recap Steiner vs. Booker T., which is basically Steiner going insane and attacking Booker.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is challenging after beating Goldberg last month. Booker comes out first and Tony talks about the World Title not being on last tonight. Before he comes out, Steiner chokes an agent for the title match not going on last. I can get behind that. Booker gets the fans clapping to start things off so Steiner backs him into the corner and gets in an elbow to the jaw. Booker’s forearm sends Steiner out to the floor, allowing Scott to jump the barricade and yell at a fan.

Back in and Booker gets beaten down, only to come back with a clothesline for two. They head into the crowd because Steiner and Booker T. won’t wrestle for some reason. Steiner throws Booker through the second announcers’ table and chokes the referee for only counting to two. There’s the top rope Samoan drop to set up some push-ups but Booker leapfrogs over Scott to take it back outside. That goes nowhere so Booker starts with the kicks, including a missile dropkick and ax kick for two each. It’s time for the pipe though as Steiner beats down Booker and the referee, drawing the lame DQ.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that good before the lame ending which made things even worse. We’re 0-2 on the three main events and this was the best of them so far. There’s an idea here with Steiner being too hot headed to win the title but it would have helped if they had done a good match before getting here. Booker’s comeback was nice but they needed something better than this after all the other stuff they’ve done tonight.

Jeff Jarrett has to come out and help calm Steiner down.

We recap the main event which is basically Goldberg is dominant and Kronik are big and strong. Go have a four minute match to wrap up this pay per view.

Goldberg vs. Kronik

Before the match (because giving it more time would be stupid), Adams says Goldberg is too hurt to wrestle so the referee needs to count. We cut to the back where the Wrestling Commission guys announce that Goldberg is cleared. Goldberg’s music hits with six minutes left in the show and the bell rings with just over four to go. They brawl to the floor because this is nothing resembling a wrestling match. Kronik takes over but loads up a table, only to have Goldberg knock Adams away and spear Clark through the table for a pin. Adams gets two off a full nelson slam and it’s the spear and Jackhammer to keep Goldberg around.

Rating: F. That’s you main event people: Goldberg doing the same old thing he’s done for over three years now over a team who was losing the titles to Vampiro and Great Muta a few months back. There’s nothing to talk about here and the fact that this went on last due to some injury angle that started and ended in the same night sums up this horrible show.

Overall Rating: F. Oh yeah this failed and it failed bad. There’s a good opening match where they let the wrestlers go out and do something fun but the rest is one failed idea after another. However, the key word there is idea and that’s what keeps this show above some of Russo’s disasters: you can see the thinking behind a lot of these matches. Notice that I said thinking behind and not that they actually worked.

That’s the problem here: they were trying something in most of the matches and then each of those ideas came crashing down, mainly because the wrestlers just aren’t all that good these days. I mean, Cat and Sanders are good talkers for WCW but it’s really hard to watch them do something goofy when I can flip on Raw and watch Austin, Rock and Jericho talk to people and then tear the house down with almost anyone they get in the ring with.

WCW is in a bad place right now and so much of that is due to all the turmoil from the last few months. They’re in a better place with some storylines starting to make sense and some promising young talent but you can’t come off one of the worst stretches in wrestling history and then bounce back to life like nothing ever happened. The fans, at least the ones that are left, aren’t buying it and I can’t blame them.

Look at the build for this show. WCW made it clear that this was going to be a three match card with everything else filling in the gaps. Goldberg vs. Kronik would have been lame as a Thunder main event and it closed the show. Booker vs. Steiner was the most acceptable of the three despite it being nothing more than sequel bait. The less said about Sting vs. Jarrett the better.

If I’m one of the few fans still watching and paying for WCW, why in the world am I going to keep going after this show, save for pure habit? Three big matches were promised and the best one under delivered. If that’s the best they can do at this point then they can’t close the doors fast enough. The worst part for me though is that this was somehow still better than a lot of what Russo had done earlier in the year. Those lats summer and early fall shows really were that bad, though this was getting close to their level.

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Thunder – October 18, 2000: The WCW Rumble

Thunder
Date: October 18, 2000
Location: Rod Laver Arena, Melbourne, Australia
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone

We’ll wrap up the Australian tour with one of wrestling’s best traditions: a battle royal for a future title shot. In this case it’s all for the #1 contendership with the title shot coming on the Nitro after Halloween Havoc. These overseas shows have been hit or miss so it should be interesting to see how this one goes. Let’s get to it.

We see Sam Greco working out like any martial arts wrestler (in theory) does. He’ll be interviewed later.

Rey Mysterio vs. Mike Sanders

Before the match, Sanders praises Nash and the Thrillers but makes sure not to swear in the process. I can get behind that theory. This is going to be a non-title match so here’s Cat to make it No DQ as well. You know, because Rey Mysterio can get so violent and this will in no way allow interference by any of Sanders’ cronies.

Cat sits in on commentary as Mysterio takes over to start, which is made even better when Sanders lays on the middle rope for a legdrop. As in he walked over there and got into position for the move with no provocation so Rey could drop a leg on him. A top rope splash gives Rey two and now let’s look at the announcers cracking each other up. Rey bulldogs him down as this is pretty much the last thing you want to do to a champion. Then again O’Haire and Jindrak have been treated like goons for weeks and still have the belts so maybe Sanders is on to something here.

The Bronco Buster connects but Rey gets crotched on the top. Shouldn’t that have a similar impact? Sanders yells at Cat for some reason, allowing Rey to come back with a guillotine legdrop for two. A victory roll a few seconds later is enough to put Sanders away. No idea why this needed to be No DQ.

Rating: D+. Some of Rey’s high spots were good but this did more harm than good. Why WCW feels the need to have their young champions lose over and over is beyond me but that’s what we’re going to be seeing for the time being because Heaven forbid someone actually get over around here.

Shane Douglas promises to win the battle royal tonight. I wouldn’t bet on that one chum.

Video on Kronik vs. Goldberg.

Kronik jumps Goldberg from behind, possibly taking him out of the battle royal later. Smart move if nothing else.

Shane Douglas vs. Big Vito

Vito sucks up to the fans and wants to get his hands on Reno. You might try Nevada instead of Australia then. They circle each other to start until Vito gives him an atomic drop for a comedic sell job. Another atomic drop takes us to the floor and Shane gets backdropped outside for good measure. Vito hits a quick suplex and drops a headbutt for one, followed by his always good looking top rope elbow for double that. That means it’s chain time but a shot to Vito’s head only sets up the Pittsburgh Plunge for two. Not that it matters as the Franchiser ends Vito a few seconds later.

Rating: D. This was what you would expect: take someone who was hot a few years back and put them over someone you’ve been pushing lately because of whatever reason they have at the moment. Oh and make sure that the guy challenging for the Hardcore Title soon after this loses as soon as weapons get involved.

Goldberg beats up Ron Harris for no apparent reason.

Mike Awesome and Crowbar are ready for the battle royal tonight.

Boogie Knights vs. Harris Twins

This could be….well it’s going to be something for sure. After the Knights do some catchphrases, only Don comes out for some reason. The actual team takes over with a nice missile dropkick but Wright charges into a Rock Bottom. Cue Ron for a sidewalk slam on Disco….and an elbow to the Duck. Disco gets dropped face first onto the mat to send him outside where he finds ANOTHER Duck. A Duck shot to Ron sets up a high cross body to give Disco the pin.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what the point of this one was but it really didn’t work. I get the Goldberg stuff earlier in the night but the Boogie Knights vs. one of the Harris Twins really isn’t the way to get the crowd into a show. The Knights are actually a decent team though and that’s all they need to be since they aren’t likely to get near the titles anytime soon.

Team Canada promises to end General Rection’s career at Halloween Havoc. An argument breaks out over who deserves the World Title shot.

Video on Steiner vs. Booker T.

Scott Steiner invites Pamela Paulshock to join him later tonight. At least he has good taste.

Elix Skipper comes out to run his mouth about how awesome he is until someone sneaks up on him.

Goldberg vs. Elix Skipper

A gorilla press into a World’s Strongest Slam sets up the two moves and we’re done in a little over a minutes.

Post match Goldberg says that’s 11-0 and he’s coming for Kronik. As usual I’ll remind you: other than YOU’RE NEXT, Goldberg shouldn’t be talking.

As he’s done for weeks now, Jeff Jarrett says Sting is soft.

Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner vs. Kidman/Konnan

Steiner throws Kidman around like the cruiserweight jobber he is now and we’re already on the signature stuff. The gorilla press sets up the push-ups, followed by a quick stomping in the corner. Kidman gets in a quick dropkick before Konnan comes in with the rolling clothesline. It’s off to Kidman vs. Jarrett with the Sky High planting Jeff for two, only to have Torrie come out and kidnap Tygress. The top rope Angle Slam sets up the Recliner to put Kidman away in a hurry.

Rating: D. So much for Kidman meaning much around here anymore. Why bother keeping him strong when you can have Steiner and Jarrett beat up the Filthy Animals for fun? This was your usual squashing of two midcarders who could go somewhere in WCW but instead they get beaten down for the sake of Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner, the latter of whom is already #1 contender.

Goldberg is still here.

Ric Flair arrives.

Booker and Sting want the Tag Team Titles. For reasons that aren’t clear, Booker is in the battle royal tonight.

It’s time for the interview with Sam Greco who is officially part of WCW. He’s ready to be aggressive in the ring and is already friends with Goldberg. Tony asks about being a martial artist like the Cat but Greco would rather focus on wrestling in the ring. Greco talks about being a Rocky movie with a Goldberg intensity. We wrap it up with Greco saying he’ll be bringing intensity to the table three or four times. From what I can find, Greco only wrestled three times with all three matches in Japan and the first being in November 2002.

The Thrillers sing a little Backstreet Boys. Sanders is told to make sure the team keeps the titles tonight.

Video on Jarrett vs. Sting.

Tag Team Titles: Booker T./Sting vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Booker and Sting are challenging. Sting and O’Haire get things going with the champions taking over early on until Jindrak comes in to send Sting outside. In a ridiculous power display, the champs throw Sting over the top and back inside. For some reason Madden asks if the Funk Brothers are up and coming contenders. Sting elbows them both out of the corner and the hot tag brings in Booker to clean house. The ax and side kicks get two on Sean and it’s a double finisher, only to have Mike Sanders come in and jump the referee for the DQ. After the champions were knocked out in less than three minutes of course.

Sting and Booker pose as Tony says the fans deserved a better match than that. Well yeah.

This Week in WCW Motorsports was very bad as the car didn’t qualify for the race.

Kronik vs. Perfect Event

Clark doesn’t waste any time and dives off the apron to take Palumbo out, leaving Stasiak alone for a bit. The power guys beat on him like he’s the weak link of the Thrillers, which is the way the announcers are presenting him for whatever reason. I mean, ignore the team that loses all the time when you can make fun of Stasiak right? The full nelson slam causes Stasiak to kick Palumbo in the face, setting up High Times for the pin on Chuck.

Post match here’s Goldberg but he gets chaired down, followed by High Times.

Here’s Ric Flair to be interviewed by Mark Madden. Ric talks about the fans being amazing in the best country in the world because the women here are amazing. However, he’s here to bring his son home. Cue David in a white coat and Ric gets right to the point: they can have all the women they want for the next thirty days if he’ll come home. David says no so Ric leaves, causing Madden to yell at David, basically erasing all the times that he ripped on Ric months ago. With Mark yelling, David tries to give him a blood test.

Halloween Havoc video.

Countdown to Armageddon

This is basically a Royal Rumble allegedly with two minute intervals. Mike Sanders and the Cat start things off and yeah they’re not even trying to hide the fake randomness. They slug it out to start with Cat getting in an elbow and a kick because what else was he going to hit? Shawn Stasiak is in at #3 and it’s time for the run of the mill team beating on a single guy.

Chuck Palumbo is in at #4 and the intervals are more like thirty to forty seconds. The three on one beatdown continues until it’s Disco Inferno in at #5. Disco is smart enough to hang back while everyone beats on Cat until Alex Wright comes in at #6 because RANDOM. It’s rather amusing to hear Tony try to push this as a random draw which WWE was nice enough to drop years ago. Crowbar, minus the 70s stuff, is in at #7. Naturally this turns into a debate about whether or not it’s bad to work at a service station.

Ron Harris is in at #8 as these intervals are getting shorter and shorter. Don Harris is in at #9 as the ring is way too full. Jim Duggan is in at #10 as there’s barely time to write out who is entering before Penzer starts the next countdown. Duggan slugs away for a bit and it’s Lieutenant Loco in at #11. Kevin Nash is in at #12 and we take a break to come back with Nash just getting in the ring to get rid of Duggan, Loco, Sanders and Cat in just a few seconds. The Boogie Knights get rid of Crowbar but get dumped by Nash as David Flair is in at #13.

Perfect Event gets rid of the Harris Twins but get in a fight, allowing Stasiak to hit a horrible right hand to get rid of Palumbo. Stasiak jumps out to avoid facing Nash, who dumps David a few seconds later. Corporal Cajun is in at #14 and eliminated fifteen seconds later, leaving Nash alone. Kwee Wee is in at #15 and is eliminated even faster than Cajun. At least we don’t have to sit around in the meantime.

Rey Mysterio is in at #16 and actually puts Nash down with a springboard missile dropkick. Mysterio escapes a Jackknife and here’s Booker T., as in the World Champion in a match for the #1 contendership, in at #17. That goes nowhere so here’s Mike Awesome at #18. Sting is in at #19 as we’re getting some interesting names in there but the short intervals are making it really hard to care. Everyone goes after Nash, which Madden says is like an old kung fu movie. Nash gets dumped as Jeff Jarrett comes in at #20, though Scott Steiner comes in as well. We’ll call that #21.

Sting Cactus Clotheslines Jeff out for the double elimination (with Steiner leaving as well) and it’s Kidman in at #22. Awesome dumps Booker off camera (oh come on), leaving us with Awesome, Kidman and Mysterio. Lance Storm is in at #23 and nothing happens until Big Vito is in at #24. Sean O’Haire is in at #25 as the announcers can’t remember what number we’re on.

Mark Jindrak is in at #26 as they aren’t even hiding the random stuff here. Konnan is in at #27 as the mindless brawling continues. Kronik, as in both members, come in at #28 and Adams gets rid of Kidman in a hurry. Rey and Konnan go out as well, followed by Storm and Vito. The intervals have stopped and Adams hits the ugliest piledriver I’ve ever seen to thankfully not cripple Awesome.

That’s not enough to get rid of him though so here’s Goldberg, apparently not an entrant because he can’t get a title shot (but the WORLD CHAMPION can). Jindrak and O’Haire are put out and Clark quickly follows. Adams tries to bring in a chair but gets speared, setting up a double clothesline from Awesome and Goldberg to give Mike the win, thereby confusing the fans since Goldberg is still in the ring as Awesome is announced as the winner.

Rating: C. Some really questionable moments aside, this was actually pretty enjoyable. I kind of liked the hyper intervals as it kept the match from dragging because people like Jindrak, Loco and Kwee Wee certainly aren’t getting a title shot so why pretend they will? Awesome winning is a nice surprise, even though the 70s music playing to end the show really made it feel silly. It’s good to see someone fresh in the main event instead of having the same five or six guys get title shot after title shot. This was as good as it was going to be and they managed to avoid most of the stupid battle royal tropes so call it a nice surprise.

Overall Rating: D+. The big main event helped but the rest of the show still had so many of the same problems that regularly plague WCW. As is so often the case, the World Title is the only thing that matters, assuming you have any reason to care about it after all the damage it’s taken over the last year. Not a terrible show but still bad enough to fit the WCW mold to a tee.

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Monday Nitro – October 16, 2000: Going Back Down (Under)

Monday Nitro #262
Date: October 16, 2000
Location: Rod Laver Arena, Melbourne, Australia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mark Madden

We’re still in Australia and that’s been a good thing so far. Halloween Havoc is in less than two weeks and we’ve got the main event set but the main story seems to be more about humiliating the Natural Born Thrillers at every given chance. Other than that we have Goldberg trying to recreate the Streak with the Sid Vicious formula of knocking people out and counting it as a win. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Disco and Wright are challenging in a rematch from last week where the Knights pinned the champions. This is different from Thunder where the champions were pinned again as Thunder resulted in a title change whereas the previous match was restarted. Before the match, Alex rambles in German and Disco says the Thrillers are barred from ringside. The champs try to get in a cheap shot from behind to start but Disco gets a quick one off a swinging neckbreaker.

Alex gets two off a powerslam as Madden wonders why Wright has no hair. Jindrak hits Disco from the apron to take over as the fans are yelling at Disco because heel vs. heel matches aren’t a good idea. Mark puts Disco on the top rope for some hard shots to the jaw and everything breaks down, meaning it’s time for a ref bump. The Seanton Bomb misses and Disco gives Mark the Chartbuster, only to have Kronik come in with High Times to Disco. Tony: “It’s the hired guns of Mark Sanders.” Wright gets beaten down as well, allowing Jindrak to retain the titles.

Rating: D. More of the same here but at least the champions didn’t get pinned again. I can live with them being laid out with a finisher because there was no count but having them pinned twice on TV in a week was a huge bullet to their credibility. The Knights are a nice team and fit together well. I’m actually digging their stuff as both of them are good in the ring when they cut out the comedy stuff.

Sanders tells Nash that they’re about to take over WCW. Nash says he’s too hung over to do anything tonight.

Goldberg arrives.

The Thrillers come in to see the Cat and Miss Jones to talk about Nash being annoyed. Cat yells at them so Sanders makes Sting vs. Nash tonight. That’s not it though as Cat makes it a lumberjack match. Boy it’s convenient that Nash just said not to book him.

Team Canada vs. Misfits in Action

Before the match, Storm talks about being sick of Australia and promises to give Rection a preview of Halloween Havoc. It’s Loco/Cajun/AWOL for the Misfits here with Rection nowhere in sight. Skipper and Loco get things going and here’s Rection through the crowd to pull Storm off the apron. So why not just have him come out with them in the first place? Security quickly ejects him as Duggan comes in to beat on Loco.

AWOL gets the tag and is immediately dropkicked in the knee so it’s back to Loco as the beating continues. Everything breaks down (of course) and the referee gets bumped (of course), allowing Cajun to dropkick Skipper through the table (of course). Gunns slides in a chair to the wrong man but Storm’s shot to Loco’s back only gets two. Instead it’s the Maple Leaf making Cajun tap a few seconds later.

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of this same match structure over and over. You’re almost guaranteed a ref bump and some interference, but above all else you’re almost guaranteed that Team Canada will beat the Misfits with Gunns screwing something up. This has been the story for months now and it stopped being interesting when it started.

Here are Shane Douglas and Torrie to insult the fans. Shane invited the Filthy Animals to come out here for a fight right now.

Shane Douglas vs. Filthy Animals

Yes a heel is in a handicap match against non-jobbers. In this case that would be Konnan/Mysterio/Tygress, meaning we’re in our third match and are already on our fourth stable. The Animals destroy Shane until he maces them for a quick DQ.

Post match Konnan gets handcuffed to the ropes while Shane piledrives (not a shoulder breaker Tony) Mysterio.

Stasiak and Palumbo are mad about getting beaten up by Goldberg so Nash tells them to drop it.

Mysterio is put in an ambulance.

Shawn Stasiak/Chuck Palumbo vs. Crowbar/Mike Awesome

Nash is on commentary. Awesome and Palumbo get things going as Nash wants the 70s music abolished. Palumbo springboard dropkicks Awesome to the floor and the fans start chanting for Mike. A Stasiak baseball slide hits Palumbo by mistake and it’s time for an argument, allowing Awesome to dive over the top to take them both down. Things settle back down to Palumbo headscissoring Crowbar down to set up a superkick out to the floor.

Crowbar hurricanranas Palumbo and drops a slingshot legdrop on Stasiak for two. It’s back to Awesome who gets crotched on top and superplexed as Nash and Madded continue to riff on the match by talking about how horrible a student Stasiak is. Stasiak hits Palumbo by mistake and an Awesome Splash is enough to pin Shawn.

Rating: D. Even when they bring someone up to help bolster the roster they can’t help but screw things up. Nash was the star here because he’s the coach with the stupid kids under his wings and as usual, the Thrillers are made to look like losers. They’re going out of their way for this stuff at the moment and I have no idea what the point of this could be. I’m sure they’re doing this to draw money or whatever because that’s all WCW was ever about.

Nash throws a chair into the ring ala Bobby Knight to make sure you know this is ALL about Nash instead of anyone else.

Douglas is proud about what he did and wants a World Title shot tonight. Torrie calls Pamela Paulshock a very bad word.

David Flair wants Buff Bagwell in a DNA match at Halloween Havoc, whatever that is. Sanders gives him the match but has a job for David tonight.

Johnny the Bull vs. Kwee Wee

Fallout from the Lava Lamp Lounge. Kwee Wee monkey flips him to start and Johnny snaps his ankle, giving Kwee Wee a pin in about twenty seconds.

Johnny is taken out on a stretcher.

Here’s the Cat with Miss Jones for a chat. Cat hates Madden (join the club) but wants to dance. They both dance but Cat says he isn’t out here to dance. Instead he wants to beat up Mike Sanders because there isn’t room for two commissioners. Sanders comes out and says he doesn’t have time tonight but he’ll beat Cat up at Halloween Havoc. Cue Kronik to go after Cat (who makes drug references) but Goldberg comes to the ring and says bring it. Sanders holds Kronik back and Kronik accuses Goldberg of believing their own hype. A lot of trash talk keeps this going for a bit but nothing happens.

WCW World Title: Shane Douglas vs. Booker T.

Scott Steiner is on commentary. I’m so glad that WCW gave this the proper fifteen minutes of build that it deserved. The bell rings and we cut to Konnan telling Tygress to wait on him because he has something to do. Stevie talks about having his money on Booker in Vegas as Booker kicks Shane in the face. Torrie trips Booker but we cut to the fans for no logical reason. Couldn’t we cut to Torrie instead?

They fight to the floor with Shane getting the better of it, followed by a top rope clothesline for two. We hit the chinlock as Steiner wants to know why Shane isn’t going after the knee. Fair point but then again Steiner is a known genius. The reverse Hennig neck snap gets two on the champ but Steiner is telling Shane to go after the knee. If the knee is already bad, wouldn’t it be better for Steiner to have two injured body parts?

Booker fights out of a neck crank with a spinebuster and Steiner is suddenly the best analyst in the company. As in he’s calling moves and explaining what Shane should be doing to stay on the injuries. Torrie puts a chain on Shane’s hand but Kidman runs out for a save. That brings Steiner out of the chair to attack Kidman so here’s Konnan to jump Steiner. Now Jarrett comes out to attack Konnan, leaving Booker to Bookend Shane to retain the title.

Rating: D+. The neck stuff was fine and Steiner was entertaining in a very different way than usual but the five people interfering continues to make you want to scream SETTLE DOWN ALREADY. I’m still not sure why Shane got a title shot in the first place other than saying he wanted one but stranger things have happened in WCW.

Post break, Midajah yells at Kidman in Spanish and Steiner wants to fight Kidman tonight.

David Flair vs. Goldberg

This is Sanders’ brilliant idea because when you think about a way to get rid of Goldberg, you think of David Flair. Before the match, here’s Ric Flair to do commentary. Goldberg doesn’t want to fight David so he shoves David away, followed by the spear and Jackhammer for the pin in about a minute.

Ric stares at Goldberg before checking on David.

Kidman says he’s as tight with the Filthy Animals as Pamela is in her top. He’s ready for Steiner tonight. Konnan doesn’t like Scott either.

Scott Steiner vs. Kidman

Before the match, Steiner does a profanity laced version of AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE before beating up a fan. Steiner throws Kidman around to start and tries a powerbomb but thankfully some things are sacred and Kidman faceplants him. That’s about it for Kidman though as Steiner gives him the super Angle Slam, followed by the Recliner to end the squash.

Preview of a profile on Goldberg airing on CNN.

Konnan vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett interrupts Konnan as he allows Tygress to feel his hat but the rolling clothesline drops Jeff to the floor. Konnan has a chair knocked out of his hands and Jeff blasts him instead, allowing them to head back inside. A faceplant drops Jeff and it’s time for a Bronco Buster until Shane Douglas comes out to grab Tygress. Torrie goes after her as well, allowing Jeff to bring in the guitar, which hits Tygress by mistake. The Stroke puts Konnan away in a hurry.

Jarrett puts Konnan in the Scorpion.

Earlier this week, Kevin Nash had his own beer made. Ok then.

Kevin Nash vs. Sting

Lumberjack match with almost everyone we’ve seen tonight and a few others around the ring. Nash, in theory still hung over, goes right for Sting to start and fires off the knees in the corner. Sting knocks him to the floor for a beating by the Misfits and it’s time to work on Nash’s knee. The Scorpion is on in a hurry but the Thrillers helps pull Nash to the ropes. Back in and the Stinger Splash is broken up with a raised boot and Nash takes over again. Snake Eyes sets up a neck crank as I wouldn’t mind if they got to the brawl instead of going through the motions like this.

Steiner and Booker get in a fight while Nash cranks on Sting’s neck as everyone fights on the floor, setting off a GOLDBERG chant. Sting fights back with a bunch of clotheslines but the referee gets bumped on a Stinger Splash attempt. Cue Jeff with a guitar to knock Sting cold though and give Nash the pin.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? Lumberjack matches almost always go this way and there’s almost no way around it. Jarrett just hitting him with the guitar for the win was probably better than having whatever other nonsense they might have gone with here. At least the hung over stuff didn’t amount to anything, which is definitely the best for everyone involved.

Nash pulls down the straps and Tony freaks out but nothing happens to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. The overbooking has brought the show back down to normal (well normal by WCW 2000 standards) and it’s still just as annoying. You had all of the screwy endings and the far too short matches because everything had to be packed in to a single show. There’s really no reason why a three hour Raw has fewer matches than a two hour episode of Nitro. On top of that, aside from the two main events, WCW has done a horrible job of setting up the pay per view. I have almost no idea what the other matches are and the limited build we’ve gotten goes nowhere. Bad show again and for all the worst reasons.

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Thunder – October 11, 2000: I Don’t Want To Jump Off A Cliff

Thunder
Date: October 11, 2000
Location: Entertainment Centre, Brisbane, Australia
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray

We’re still down in Australia for a show that was taped right after Nitro. Monday’s show was an improvement but it’s hard to say how well that’s going to carry over because this company has the consistency of a broken roller coaster. Halloween Havoc is in a few weeks and most of the card is already set though so let’s get to it.

Scott Steiner and Jeff Jarrett yell at Shawn Stasiak, telling him to tell Sanders that Steiner wants Booker tonight. Of all the people you could tell this to, you pick Shawn Stasiak?

Shane Douglas/Lance Storm vs. Konnan/General Rection

Fallout from the Down Underwear match on Monday. Before the match, Douglas and Torrie rip on the Australians for being wannabe Americans. O Canada is interrupted by the Misfits theme, which is quite the downgrade. The good guys rush the ring and clean house before we get going. Douglas and Konnan slug it out in the corner to start but Storm sneaks in with a blind tag, setting up a springboard cross body to drop Konnan in a nice move.

The heels take turns on Konnan with Shane nailing a nice basement dropkick. You would have thought Storm would use that spot. Gunns offers a quick trip though and a double clothesline puts Storm and Konnan down. We get a good looking catfight as Rection comes in off the hot tag. Rection’s top rope elbow gets two on Storm with Shane using a reverse Hennig necksnap for the save. Cue Kidman for a Kid Crusher to Shane, setting up No Laughing Matter for the pin.

Rating: C. Storyline advancement, Kidman, a three way catfight and some good looking stuff from Storm and Douglas. What more can you ask for from a short tag match between two midcard storylines? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think WCW was actually being booked somewhat well.

Mike Sanders is singing Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport (obviously an Outback Jack fan) when Stasiak comes in to explain Steiner’s demands. Booker gets a non-title match tonight (not necessarily against Steiner) and a quick argument breaks out over a stuffed kangaroo.

Here’s the Cat to talk to Australian martial arts champion Sam Greco. Sam admits that most people don’t know who he is but he’ll fight anyone that WCW puts in front of him. Cue the Thrillers, with Sanders saying Cat can’t hire anyone. Cat: “I hired your mom last night.” Sanders is annoyed so Cat gives him Stevie Ray tonight, which forces him to make Cat vs. Kevin Nash. We’re still not done yet though as Cat changes the match to Sanders vs. Sting. Greco kicks Sanders down and that’s supposed to be his big introduction. Tank Abbott he is not.

Jindrak and O’Haire don’t have much to say to Sanders.

Tag Team Titles: Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak vs. Lieutenant Loco/Corporal Cajun

Jindrak and O’Haire are defending and start beating up the much smaller guys in a hurry. Loco is thrown across the ring and clotheslined down. The Misfits come right back with DDT’s, only to have Sean plant Loco with a tilt-a-whirl slam. The hurricanrana into the Seanton gets two with Chavo making the save, setting up a Frog splash for two on Sean. Leroux grabs a hurricanrana of his own for the very quick pin on Jindrak for the titles in a big surprise.

Rating: C. They kept this one moving fast in the smartest move of the night as Chavo and Leroux are only so interesting even when they’re at their highest speed. O’Haire and Jindrak are a good, young team and it’s really no surprise that they lose in a nothing match like this to a low level team.

Not so fast though as Sanders comes out and says the rematch is RIGHT NOW.

Tag Team Titles: Lieutenant Loco/Corporal Cajun vs. Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak

A quick double rollup gets two on the new champs and Sean superkicks Chavo. Lash dives back in with a high cross body for two, followed by a botched sunset flip for the same. All four stay in the ring and we get an awkward sequence where Sean brings in a belt but watches Jindrak get sunset flipped again for two more before hitting Lash in the head to turn a hurricanrana into a powerbomb. That’s still not it though as Chavo makes the save but gets knocked out, setting up the Seanton for the pin to give the Thrillers the titles back. Too short to rate but as usual the title change doesn’t mean much.

AWOL comes out to fight the champs.

Elix Skipper brags about being an Olympian and wants Kidman later tonight.

Kronik vs. Booker T.

Non-title. Before the match Booker doe some good sucking up to the fans. Well what else is a face champion supposed to do? The beatdown is on in a hurry with Kronik beating Booker down like he’s any given jobber. It’ snot like titles mean anything anyway right? The full nelson slam looks to set up High Times but here’s Goldberg through the crowd to spear Clark. Adams almost gets a full nelson slam on Goldberg but eats a superkick from Booker as the match is thrown out. Well that was pointless.

Chuck Palumbo is on the phone with someone who might be his mom and asks for advice against Goldberg.

Johnny the Bull tells an arriving Nash that Sanders is having problems but Nash doesn’t seem worried.

Kidman vs. Elix Skipper

This could be fun and Duggan is with Skipper. Kidman pounds away to start and dives onto Duggan with a nice plancha. Back in and Kidman misses a quick splash, allowing Skipper to stomp away. We get some CANADA SUCKS chants as Skipper misses a top rope elbow (drawing a Macho Man reference from Madden).

The Bodog gets two for Kidman and a quick BK Bomb gets the same. Kidman gets crotched and Skipper rope walks into a hurricanrana for a cool looking yet mostly screwed up spot. Not that it matters as Duggan gets in a board shot, setting up the Play of the Week (Wasn’t it Play of the Day last time?) for the pin.

Rating: C-. I was expecting more here but they’re doing a good job of building Skipper up as a player in the division. This makes him 1-1 against Mysterio and Kidman which is a lot better than a lot of people do. Just like so many cares before him though, it’s likely that he winds up doing nothing because the Cruiserweight Title is stuck in an angle instead of a feud but at least he isn’t being wasted.

Palumbo confirms that he was indeed talking to his mom but lets it slip that she told him to run. WHY ARE YOU TREATING THE THRILLERS LIKE WORTHLESS COWARDS??? WCW spent all this time and effort to bring these guys up (years after they should have) and it’s another excuse to waste them while making the old guys look strong. Yeah they’ve gotten the midcard titles that almost everyone has won over the years and haven’t done anything for anyone but since it’s WCW they do the same things over and over and over again and then wonder why it doesn’t go anywhere.

It’s time for an Australian Lava Lamp Lounge because this gimmick WILL get over no matter how dead it is. At least the set is a bit more festive this week with the Australian décor. Tonight’s guests are Kwee Wee (not Kiwi Mike, though it would be easier to type) and Paisley and Mike gets right to hitting on her. Kwee Wee talks about training with the Thrillers and yells at Mike for the Paisley stuff, only to have the Thrillers and Harris Brothers come out for the weekly attack. Another week with the same stuff because WCW wants to make Mike Awesome look as stupid and worthless as possible.

Sanders tells Nash about his match with Sting tonight. So Nash wasn’t watching the show either?

Goldberg vs. Chuck Palumbo

After the long entrance, Palumbo (looking very serious in yellow) tries a cheap shot with as much success as you would expect. Stasiak gets in a shot from the apron but Goldberg no sells a top rope shoulder. A spear drops both guys and Goldberg Jackhammers both of them for back to back pins, making the new streak 7-0. To be fair they had to do something to make this new one get higher in a hurry and this is as good as they can get.

Halloween Havoc video.

Sting vs. Mike Sanders

Non-title of course. Jarrett comes out dressed as Surfer Sting (again to Metallica) and points the bat at Sanders. Jeff talks about having no heart anymore and lays down, drawing out the real Sting to clean house. A Stinger Splash misses though and Sanders gets in a few bat shots followed by a dancing DiBiase falling punch. We hit a cobra clutch of all things until Sting makes the obvious comeback with three Stinger Splashes and a Death Drop for the easy pin. Good thing those baseball bat shots didn’t have too much effect.

Post break Sanders yells at the Thrillers, even though he should be yelling at Jarrett for bailing so early. Then again, heels aren’t supposed to make sense.

Harris Twins vs. Mike Awesome/Crowbar

Awesome gets beaten down by the Twins to start as the referee continues to not care about doing his job. Crowbar dropkicks both Twins out to the floor and the thrown together 70s team (the fact that Crowbar was one of the roster’s hidden gems for so long and gets this as a reward sums up a lot of WCW’s problems) getting the better of it early on.

Crowbar tries to speed things up a bit too much though until he charges into a Rock Bottom as everything breaks down. A nice wheelbarrow suplex (always liked that move) drops Ron but it’s already table time. I’m not sure if I’d rather have a table involved or watch the Harris Brothers try to have a regular match. The table is set in the corner but Awesome counters a powerbomb with a backdrop to drive Ron through for the pin.

Rating: C-. The action was faster paced here but the important thing is the Twins losing. I know it isn’t going to mean anything long term but at least a team of two talented guys who work hard got a win over one of the least interesting acts in the company. Maybe that’s just dumb luck or maybe it’s Russo being gone. Either way, at least it was the right call.

Rey Mysterio vs. Scott Steiner

We get a few rhymes from Steiner about how awesome he is with the ladies. For some reason Stevie says that watching BET at night doesn’t mean you’re going to win. Tony: “Tygress, you got it girl.” Steiner knees Rey in the ribs to start and we’re already in squash mode. If it’s good enough for the Jung Dragons, squashing Rey isn’t much of a stretch of course. I mean, all cruiserweights are the same right?

Rey tries to speed things up but gets his head taken off by a clothesline. Steiner throws him over the top but Rey hangs on, allowing him to drop a springboard legdrop to break up the pushups. A hurricanrana staggers Steiner again….and he throws Rey down with a suplex to take over again. Something like an Angle Slam from the middle rope sets up the Recliner to end this squash.

Rating: D. I get the idea here but there has to be someone besides Mysterio that you could put into this spot. Normally this should have been Lash Leroux but for some reason we already saw him twice tonight. You can’t find anyone else other than the most successful cruiserweight the company has ever had to take this beating? No one at all? With the roster WCW had they didn’t have three schnooks to put out there and get squashed in a handicap match?

Kevin Nash vs. The Cat

Oh wait as here’s Mike Sanders because we haven’t seen him enough. Stevie: “When is he going to defend that belt?” Tony announcers Nitro and Thunder in England next month but Stevie doesn’t want to go. Did he turn heel and I missed it? Sanders sits in on commentary in a holdover Russo trope but pops up to the apron for an early distraction. You know, because Kevin Nash needs help against The Cat.

Nash does his usual slow offense in the corner while throwing in some trash talk. Now it’s Nash offering a test of strength but getting kicked in the ribs for a surprise knockdown. I’m stunned Nash actually bumped for that. Another karate shot stuns Nash but he kicks Cat in the face. There go the straps but Sanders comes in with a chair to knock Cat out for absolutely no apparent reason.

Booker comes out to save Cat from a powerbomb through the chair. This brings out Steiner which brings out Sting which brings out Jarrett. The heels dominate until Goldberg comes out, only to have Kronik run in and give Goldberg High Times to end the show. One note here: for the last few weeks they’ve had a Halloween Havoc countdown come on screen a few times a show. It’s a good idea to keep fans thinking about this but also letting them know that they’re running out of time to order the show. I wish more companies would do this today as it can’t take more than a few buttons to get it on screen.

Overall Rating: D+. Again, better show here as the problems that have been plaguing the shows are still there but they’re toned way down. They need to cut out the dueling authority figures nonsense and stop with the quick title changes but the show doesn’t feel as chaotic. It doesn’t make me want to throw the remote at the screen anymore and is now just more of a show with a lot of problems instead of a show flying off a cliff. That’s something, right?

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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