Monday Night Raw – May 17, 2010: There’s A Reason We Don’t Talk About This Stuff

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 17, 2010
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
Guest Host: Buzz Aldrin

This is a requested show, mainly because it features quite the Canadian cast of stars in Toronto. That should be enough to make things interesting, but we’re also in the Bret Hart Era, as he showed up again back in January and just kind of stayed. We could be in for a fun time, as I have almost no memory of this time. Let’s get to it.

As a bonus, this show is commercial free.

Opening sequence. Dang I miss Nickelback. Yeah I said it.

Here is Bret Hart to get things going and yeah the fans seem to like him (the Blue Jays jersey probably helps). Last week Hart heard Miz challenge him to a US Title match here in Toronto and he doesn’t take challenges lightly. He called headquarters and said book the match but now he’s had a week to think about it. There are so many old wrestlers who keep hanging around long past their time and he doesn’t want to be one, so the match is off.

Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt and he wants to know why Hart came back. Hart can’t fool him because all Jericho sees is a pathetic has been. Jericho doesn’t think Hart cares about closure and he’s only back here because he’s a big phony. Hart deserved to get screwed in Montreal, but Hart asks Jericho when he last looked in a mirror. What Hart remembers is Jericho learning in the Hart Dungeon but he was more often up getting a drink instead of training.

Jericho is the one who needs to take a good look at himself, but Jericho says he did that earlier and saw a man better than Hart ever was. Jericho thinks Hart is out here to hear the fans cheer for him one more time, but the reality is Hart doesn’t matter. To all of Hart’s new fans…..pause for a pro-Bret chant…..the reality is the Hart name means nothing anymore. Stu Hart would be ashamed of his son.

Jericho goes to leave, but Hart says tell Miz to get his boots on because he has a match tonight. That makes Jericho chuckle because he thinks Hart will try to get himself disqualified, so the match should be No DQ. Works for Hart, who also promises that the Hart Dynasty is going to beat Jericho and Miz on Sunday at Over The Limit. This felt like a way to have Jericho and Hart together in the ring and….yeah that works.

Great Khali hates rental cars. Hornswoggle is in a Hummer. It’s a WWEshop ad.

Here is Edge for a chat before his name. He talks about the people Randy Orton has been RKOing in recent weeks but gets cut off by Orton’s handpicked opponent for later tonight (with Edge getting to pick Orton’s later).

Edge vs. Christian

They take their time to start with a lockup going nowhere, leaving Edge looking rather confused. Christian takes him down again and we have another standoff. Edge slaps him in the face and bails to the floor to start the chase. Back in and Edge hammers away to take over, only to have Christian hit him in the face a few times. Christian sends him outside though and hits a slingshot neck snap, setting up the springboard dive to the floor.

Christian’s charge hits the barricade though and he barely beats the count back in. Back in and Edge grabs the armbar before knocking Christian down to cut off the comeback attempt. The armbar goes on again, only to have Edge switch to a simple pull on the arm. Christian fights up but can’t hit the pendulum kick in the corner. Edge catches him on top but a superplex attempt is countered into a tornado DDT for two.

The Killswitch is countered so Christian hits him in the face instead. Christian’s top rope splash misses and Edge sends him hard into the corner. The spear misses for Edge though and Christian hits the pendulum kick. The Killswitch still doesn’t work though as Christian’s arm gives out, with Edge sending it hard into the post. Now the spear can give Edge the pin.

Rating: B. Yeah of course these two are going to be able to have a good match with each other in their sleep. It helps when they’ve known each other for the better part of ever and they had the time to put together something solid. This felt like a showdown and they beat each other up with Edge picking the arm apart and finishing him off.

Post match Randy Orton pops up on screen to say he isn’t sure why Christian was out there, because that wasn’t Edge’s opponent. Here’s Orton’s pick to face Edge.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge immediately bails to the apron and yeah he’ll just take the countout.

Post match Christian throws Edge in and there’s the chokeslam.

Maryse is not happy with Trish Stratus being on the cover of a magazine because Trish is no celebrity. She also mocks Divas Champion Eve Torres, who shows up to pour powder over Maryse. The brawl is on with Maryse being left laying.

Buzz Aldrin and his wife are here when Vickie Guerrero comes in to introduce herself. There’s just one problem: the Aldrins are in her office. Aldrin talks about walking on the moon and compares it to Vickie walking out as GM of Raw. Actually her replacement will be here next week! Aldrin tries to show her some app on his phone but Vickie doesn’t care. That’s fine with him, as he has the Bella Twins come in and get rid of her. My goodness I forgot how worthless this whole concept really was.

We look at Batista attacking Mark Henry with a chair last week and putting him in something like the Rings of Saturn.

Mark Henry vs. Batista

Henry’s shoulder is taped up and Batista jumps him from behind with a 2×4. The shoulder is sent into the post and Batista steps onto Henry to get in the ring. Batista demands and receives a spotlight. Posing ensues and no match.

We look at the history between Sheamus and John Cena.

Ted DiBiase vs. Yoshi Tatsu

DiBiase brings out VIRGIL as his bodyguard as he is getting to throw his money around. Tatsu starts fast with an armdrag into a dropkick for two but gets driven into the corner. A big gutbuster takes Tatsu down though and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Tatsu kicks him in the face, then does it to the chest for two. Back up and Tatsu misses another shot and walks into Dream Street for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can consider a lot of factors about why DiBiase’s time in WWE didn’t go well, but at the end of the day, he just wasn’t that interesting. He has average size, a generic look and nothing special in the ring. Other than his father, what was there that made him stand out in any way?

Post match DiBiase calls out R-Truth (who turned down the chance to be DiBiase’s “Virgil”) and says the person who has no problem with being the new Virgil is the original Virgil. DiBiase says he if can’t buy it, he’ll beat it, including R-Truth at Over The Limit.

Chris Jericho gives Miz a pep talk and Miz is NOT answering questions. Instead, Miz talks about how you don’t see a national hero coming back again but Miz is ready to beat him. Miz walks into the arena and promises to embarrass both Bret Hart and the Hart Family name. He promises to make Hart scream and tap out to the Sharpshooter, just to make it personal.

US Title: Miz vs. Bret Hart

Hart is challenging and this is No DQ/No Countout. Miz immediately bails out to the floor and says he doesn’t trust Hart, who would bring in the Hart Dynasty. Cue Vladimir Kozlov and William Regal, who have been paid to deal with them. Indeed cue the Hart Dynasty to brawl with them to the back so cue Chris Jericho, with Natalya coming in to even things up a bit. A slap drops Jericho but he’s back up to deck Hart. David Hart-Smith is back in to help make the save but Miz loads up a Sharpshooter. Tyson Kidd runs in to break that up and it’s a Hart Attack into the Sharpshooter to make Hart champion.

Rating: C. Obviously this was more of an angle than a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Hart gets one more title win, even a token one, and it was a nice feeling in his home country. It also furthers the Dynasty vs. Jericho/Miz so it’s not like anything was terribly hurt. This went fine and they got out of there quickly, which always helps.

Hart and his family get to celebrate a bit.

Money In The Bank is getting its own pay per view.

We look at John Cena winning a Beat The Clock Challenge a few weeks ago, meaning he got to pick the stipulation for his match with Batista at Over The Limit. Then Sheamus jumped him from behind to lay him out.

We get a message from our sponsor: Santino Marella, parodying a Dos Equis beer commercial.

Laycool/Maryse vs. Bella Twins/Eve Torres

Layla (the real one) and McCool both have Women’s Titles. After a near brawl before the bell, Layla grabs a headlock on Eve to start before sweeping the legs and getting two off a rollup. Eve is right back with a neckbreaker for two and it’s Brie coming in, with Layla rolling her up for two. McCool gets in a cheap shot to take over and then comes in for some knees to the ribs. Layla misses a legdrop though and Nikki comes in…as McCool pulls her over the top. A monkey flip and Hennig necksnap get two on McCool but Maryse comes in with the French Kiss (DDT) to finish Nikki.

Rating: C-. To say the women’s division was not doing great around this time would be an understatement, and that almost non-existent crowd reaction didn’t make it much better. They did feel like they were trying and it helped, but there is only so much you can do to overcome these problems. It felt like they were going over every piece of their script and that doesn’t make for the best match.

Post match Maryse and Eve have to be held apart.

John Cena isn’t worried about his critics because he would rather speak to those who still support him. He and the Cenation have tasted victory and defeat but he has never not delivered on a promise. Tonight he is ready to take Sheamus out and then he will go on to face Batista in an I Quit match at Over The Limit. If Batista can make him quit, there will be no rematch because the champion should not be a quitter. Batista has hurt him before but Batista can’t make him quit. At Over The Limit, Batista will quit and the champ will be here.

Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger

This is Edge’s pick to face Orton and Swagger’s World Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Michael Cole lists off Swagger’s talents, including being a Scrabble champion. Orton takes him down to start and Swagger is already thinking twice about this. Orton’s backbreaker has Swagger down and we hit the slow motion stomp. The big knee misses though and Swagger hits a clothesline for two.

Orton fights out of a chinlock and Orton starts the comeback but Swagger bails to the floor. Back in and Swagger snaps off a belly to belly, setting up the running Vader Bomb. Swagger takes him outside to keep up the beating before grabbing another chinlock back inside. Orton fights up again and kicks him away, followed by the snap powerslam. Now the hanging DDT can connect and Orton loads up the RKO, only to have Edge come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The only thing this match did was remind me how awful Swagger was as champion. It wasn’t so much that he wasn’t skilled, but he felt completely out of place in this role and very far in over his head. Orton never felt like he was in serious trouble and that shouldn’t be the case against the World Champion.

Post match it’s an RKO to Swagger but Edge spears Orton down.

Over The Limit rundown.

Here is Buzz Aldrin for a chat. He’s happy to be here and talks about liking Swagger vs. Orton. Over the last few years, he’s been trying to make the space program better and we need new rockets and spacecraft. Canada has done some wonderful things as well, including building the landing gear on the craft he and Neil Armstrong used to land on the moon.

Finally Zack Ryder and Alicia Fox interrupt, with Ryder mocking Canada and their love of moose meat. Ryder implies that the moon landing was faked and we see a clip of Aldrin punching someone who said the same thing. Aldrin says he won’t pound Ryder…and we awkwardly pause until Evan Bourne and Gail Kim interrupt. Thankfully the match starts to wrap this up, as Aldrin was completely out of place here. That being said, who in the world thought he was a good choice to be in this spot?

Evan Bourne/Gail Kim vs. Zack Ryder/Alicia Fox

Bourne chops away to start and gets one off a sunset flip. Ryder comes back with a swinging neckbreaker as commentary mocks almost everything Aldrin was talking about and reference space movies. Everything breaks down and Kim hits a missile dropkick for two on Fox. Back up and Fox sends her to the floor as we talk about Aldrin on Dancing With The Stars. The neck crank doesn’t last long as it’s Ryder snapping off a running hurricanrana to Ryder. Fox breaks up the shooting star press, leaving Kim to hit Eat Defeat for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well, at least it was better than Aldrin. This was a rather out of nowhere tag match and save for maybe a brief feud, there was little reason to see these people fighting. As for Aldrin…yeah I’m not sure what they were thinking. He’s a celebrity but that doesn’t mean he belongs on a wrestling show. I don’t get the point of this, but that was the case with almost the entirety of the guest host period.

Post match Aldrin gets in to celebrate and even does something close to a moon walk.

Another ad, this one with Goldust as a blind date.

Sheamus vs. John Cena

Non-title. They start slowly with Sheamus taking him into the corner and stomping away. Cena shrugs that off and they head outside, where Sheamus is sent hard into the steps. Back up and Sheamus sends him into the barricade and they head back inside, where Sheamus gets to slowly hammer away. A suplex gets Cena out of trouble and he sends Sheamus into the post for another crash outside.

Back in and the AA attempt is countered so Cena settles for the ProtoBomb. Sheamus is back up to knock him to the apron for a running knee, which works so well that he does it again. Cena gets back in but the running bulldog is shrugged off. Sheamus slowly hammers away until Cena manages the flying shoulder to start the comeback. The threat of the AA has Sheamus grabbing the ropes but Batista runs in to jump Cena for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was better than almost anything else on the show and it shouldn’t be a surprise. Cena works well against power brawlers and that’s what you got to see here, as Sheamus continues to be someone Cena just can’t pin. It might not have been a classic, but it was a hard hitting brawl at the end of a not so great show and I’ll certainly take that here.

Post match Batista lays Cena out with a pair of spinebusters and grabs something like the Rings of Saturn to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The opener and the Hart stuff made this work as well as it did, but egads this era does not hold up well. For the parts that do work, there are even more things that miss almost entirely, like the Aldrin stuff (including the tag match), DiBiase and the women’s match. There is a reason you do not hear this period talked about very often and this was a good illustration of why that is the case.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2022 (2023 Edition): What The Heck Was I Thinking?

Royal Rumble 2022
Date: January 29, 2022
Location: The Dome At America’s Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 44,390
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

Somehow this show was a year ago and that might be better for everyone involved. This show was absolutely not well received and I am almost scared to see just how badly this falls down. Hopefully time has been a bit kinder to it, but you never can tell. In addition to the Royal Rumbles, we have Seth Rollins challenging Roman Reigns for the Undisputed Title and Brock Lesnar defending the WWE Title against Bobby Lashley. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the Titantron on my right.

The opening video looks at how the Road To Wrestlemania begins here. As usual we get the Royal Rumble highlight reel and dang there have been some great moments over the years. The rest of the matches, which don’t mean nearly as much (as usual), get some attention as well.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Reigns is defending and is currently by himself, as Paul Heyman has jumped back to Brock Lesnar and the Usos are barred from ringside. In the name of mind games, Rollins comes to the ring to the old Shield music, complete with the through the crowd entrance and gear (Of note: McAfee talks about the Shield days and says it was “Mox”, Seth and Roman”.).

Rollins goes with the grappling to start and Reigns is frustrated early. The corner clotheslines miss for Reigns and Rollins clotheslines him to the floor. Back to back suicide dives don’t do Rollins much good as Reigns knocks him out of the air back inside. They fight to the floor again though and Rollins is fine enough to hit a quick powerbomb through the announcers’ table.

Back in and the frog splash gets two but Rollins misses the Phoenix splash. Reigns’ spear is cut off by a boot to the face though and a buckle bomb into the Stomp gets a close two. Another Stomp is loaded up but Reigns blasts him with a clothesline to cut that off. Reigns’ powerbomb gets two so Rollins laughs at him, earning the big forearms to the face. The laughter is enough to let Rollins pull him into a triangle choke, which is broken up with another hard powerbomb.

They head back outside with Rollins being sent into various things, followed by a Superman Punch for two back inside. They head outside again and the spear cuts Rollins in half. Back in and another spear is countered into the Pedigree (how Rollins beat him for the title in 2016) for a rather close two.

Rollins has to elbow his way out of a Rock Bottom attempt and kicks Reigns in the face. Another spear cuts Rollins down again….but he’s still laughing at Reigns. Rollins holds out the Shield fist so Reigns pulls him into the guillotine. The referee checks the arm, with the hand falling onto the rope for the break. Well in theory at least, as Reigns doesn’t let go and it’s a DQ at 14:23.

Rating: B. This was a good match and that shouldn’t be a shock given who was in there. Any combination of the Shield guys are going to work well together and that was on display here. They tied the history of the team in well and Rollins broke Reigns down mentally, which should set up a huge rematch down the line. Granted it didn’t and this was a one off match, but it should have set something up.

Post match Reigns is all upset and slowly grabs a chair. The big beatdown leaves Rollins laying.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and Sasha Banks (in Sailor Moon gear) is in at #1 and Melina is in at #2. They pose at each other to start before Banks dumps her in less than a minute. That leaves Banks do to Melina’s splits pose until Tamina is in at #3. Banks dropkicks her through the ropes before Tamina can get inside, setting up the Meteora from the apron. Tamina saves herself back inside but gets caught with a quick Rey Mysterio bulldog. Running knees have Tamina in trouble in the corner but she headbutts her way to freedom.

Kelly Kelly is in at #4 and it’s strange to see her as anything but the blonde. Kelly comes in for the short form screaming headscissors but stops to dance, allowing Tamina to run her over. For some reason Kelly tries the triangle choke over the ropes on Banks and gets dumped for not thinking that through. Aliyah is in at #5 and hits a weird looking standing Thesz press to hammer on Banks. Tamina slaps Aliyah and they grapple against the ropes as Liv Morgan is in at #6.

Morgan knocks everyone down and stops for a bow, allowing Banks to hit Three Amigos. Queen Zelina is in at #7 and kicks Banks out in a pretty big upset. Tamina can’t eliminate Aliyah as Bianca Belair is in at #8. A kick to the head rocks Tamina and Belair muscles Vega up for a suplex. Belair’s handspring kick to the face can’t get rid of Morgan but she does hit Vega with a moonsault. Dana Brooke, with Reggie, is in at #9 but she does say she’ll go in on her own. Tamina saves Zelina for some reason so Brooke gives Belair a handspring elbow in the corner.

Michelle McCool is in at #10, giving us Tamina, Aliyah, Morgan, Zelina, Belair, Brooke and McCool. House is cleaned and McCool knocks Brooke….right into Reggie’s arms. The Faithbreaker hits Vega and Brooke gets tossed for good this time. Sonya Deville is in at #11 and goes over to join commentary rather than getting inside. The slow elimination attempts continue until Natalya is in at #12.

Morgan goes right at Natalya, who puts her on the apron without much trouble. It’s not quite enough for an elimination so Natalya dumps Tamina instead. More teased eliminations continue until Cameron is in at #13. Cameron cleans some of the house as Deville gets up and slides in, where she takes out Cameron without much trouble. Natalya and Deville are the only ones left standing until Naomi, who hates Deville, is in at #14.

A springboard spinning kick to the face rocks Deville and Naomi kicks her out. Carmella is in at #15 and Corey Graves certainly approves. Carmella walks around the ring as a good chunk of the other women bunched up on one side of the ring for some reason. Rhea Ripley is in at #16 and throws Carmella inside, only to get triple teamed down. Ripley shrugs that off and knocks out Carmella and Vega without much trouble.

Charlotte is in at #17 as a bunch of people go after Natalya. Aliyah is tossed out after about 23 minutes, followed by Naomi being kicked to the floor. She hangs on by her feet….but Sonya Deville is still here to pull Naomi out for the elimination anyway. Ivory, as part of the Right To Censor, is in at #18 and says nothing has changed since she was last here. It is hard for her to look at these girls and, as she gets in the ring, she says she sees a lot of wayward, lost little girls. As she is talking, Ripley picks her up and, as she is still talking, Ripley tosses her out. Ivory: “HOW DARE YOU???”

With that rather funny bit out of the way, Brie Bella is in at #19 and starts the YES chant but can’t get rid of Natalya. Ripley and Belair can’t get rid of Charlotte as Mickie James, reigning Impact Wrestling Knockouts (or Women’s, as the graphic says) Champion is in at #20. That gives us Morgan, Belair, McCool, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Brie Bella and James, the latter of whom goes right after McCool. A headscissors gets rid of McCool and it’s Alicia Fox (with the brown hair instead of the blonde hair) in at #21.

Fox gets to clean some house and the referee checks on Natalya. Nikki Ash is in at #22 and we pause for her to sneak up on Ripley but, of course, she can’t eliminate her. Everyone pairs off until WWE Legend Summer Rae (AND HER SONG THAT IS SO FREAKING CATCHY) is in at #23. A slap off with Natalya goes to Rae, but Charlotte runs her over before anything can get interesting. Natalya dumps Rae and it’s Nikki Bella in at #24. House is cleaned again and the Bellas get to reunite, with Nikki knocking out Fox. Sarah Logan returns at #25, gets in a few shots, and is tossed by the Bellas.

They toss Liv as well, after a pretty ridiculous 37 minutes without an elimination. Liv and Logan get their reunion on the floor as Lita is in at #26. Mickie goes after Lita and gets DDTed, allowing Lita to get the easy elimination. Charlotte and Lita slug it out until Mighty Molly is in at #27…and gets jumped by Ash on the floor. Molly is tossed in and then eliminated by Ash, who gets in a rather long pose and stare. Ronda Rousey makes her big return at #28 and yeah this feels like a huge deal, especially with almost everyone in the ring stopping to look at her.

Ash is out fast and Nikki Bella is sent to the apron…where Brie punches her out. Shotzi is in at #29 as Rousey gets rid of Brie. Rousey goes after Belair and Natalya powerbombs Charlotte as Shayna Baszler completes the field at #30. That gives us a final grouping of Belair, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Lita, Rousey, Shotzi and Baszler. Rousey and Baszler start wrecking people before squaring off instead. Charlotte interrupts that as well so Rousey kicks out Shotzi.

Belair gets rid of Natalya but Natalya comes back in, only to be tossed by Rousey as well. Lita cleans house, including a middle rope hurricanrana on Ripley. The Litasault is loaded up but Ripley breaks it up and, say it with me, Charlotte gets rid of Lita. Ripley and Rousey fight to the apron and Charlotte kicks Ripley out. Belair kicks Charlotte on the apron and spinebusters Baszler but Baszler catches her in the Kirifuda Clutch. That’s reversed into a KOD attempt but Charlotte dumps both of them. We’re down to Rousey vs. Charlotte and they square off, until Charlotte missed a boot in the corner and gets dumped at 59:45.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly great and showed just how little depth there was to the women’s division at this point. Of the thirty women involved, HALF of them were legends or returning names. I know why there is a Women’s Royal Rumble, but if you need to import half of the lineup, it might be time to put it on the shelf. With six of the entrants not even making it a minute each, this was a bunch of nothing until Rousey came in and won, because part timers and returning stars rule.

Titus O’Neil and company did their local charity stuff.

Raw Women’s Title: Doudrop vs. Becky Lynch

Doudrop is challenging and attacked Lynch leading up to the title match. After the Big Match Intros, Doudrop goes with the power to send Becky outside for a breather. Back in and Becky has to bail from a Vader Bomb, leaving Doudrop to get Cannonball the steps by mistake. Becky kicks away but what looks to be a tornado DDT is blocked. The sleeper puts Doudrop down to one knee but she powers out without much effort. Doudrop’s charge goes into the post and Becky hits the missile dropkick for two.

Becky gets run over again though and a backsplash connects for two. The triangle choke has Becky in some trouble but the sitout powerbomb breaks that up fast. The Cannonball gets two but Becky is back up with a Molly Go Round for two of her own. Doudrop’s throat is snapped across the top and a top rope Fameasser gets two more. Back up and Doudrop plants her for two more, only to have another Vader Bomb countered into a super Manhandle Slam to retain the title at 12:55.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much bad as much as it was a lot of standing around waiting on the finish. Doudrop wasn’t about to dethrone the biggest women’s star ever, even if this is a downgraded Becky. This was Becky being given a mountain to climb and I can absolutely give them points for running a fresh challenger out there. That’s a good thing, but you need to have an entertaining match to back it up and that wasn’t the case here. When the most exciting thing in a match is the Wrestlemania sign catching on fire, you’re in big trouble.

The announced attendance is 44,390.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley. They’re very similar, they’re monsters, they were amateur wrestlers, the were mixed martial artists, now they’re having a title match.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley

Lesnar is defending and has Paul Heyman with him while Lashley has MVP. They fight over a lockup to start until Lesnar snaps off a German suplex. Lashley is right back with one of his own but Lesnar hits two in a row. The F5 is countered though and Lashley hits a pair of spears to send Lesnar outside. Another spear sends Lashley through the barricade in the required big crash and Lesnar is rather smiley.

Lashley is back up to post Lesnar and they head back inside. Back in and Lesnar grabs more German suplexes but Lashley slaps on a quick Hurt Lock. Lesnar rams him into the corner for the break and the F5 hits Lashley, only to bump the referee at the same time. Cue Roman Reigns to spear Lesnar down before telling Heyman to hand over the title. Heyman does just that and a belt shot knocks Lesnar silly. Lashley gets the cover and the title at 10:14.

Rating: C+. That’s by far the match of the night so far as it felt like something actually happened. Lesnar vs. Lashley is a genuine dream match and something different for Lesnar, though he wrestled it similar to how he wrestles everything else. The Heyman twist was a good way to go and it’s nice to see Lashley get his title back, but this could have been something special and instead it was just ok. Granted Lashley injured his shoulder during the match so take it with a grain of salt.

Heyman leaves with Reigns as Lashley celebrates.

We recap Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Maryse/Miz. Edge came back, Miz didn’t like it, the wives got involved, mixed tag.

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

Miz is knocked outside to start and Maryse is sent on top of him, allowing Edge to forearm Miz back inside. A cheap shot lets Miz take over on Edge and cannonball down onto his back. Maryse chokes a bit from the floor so Beth goes a stalking, for some reason thinking she needs a chair. Edge manages a quick implant DDT and Maryse can’t cut off the tag.

Beth comes in to beat up Maryse, including a spinning side slam for two. Miz goes after Beth and gets hammered down in the corner for his efforts. Maryse gets in a cheap shot with the loaded purse for two, setting up a camel clutch of all things. That’s broken up and Beth hits a clothesline for the double knockdown.

It’s back to Edge for the Edge-O-Matic on Miz, with Beth adding a powerbomb. Edge’s top rope elbow gets two but he spears the corner for the mishap. Maryse snaps off a top rope hurricanrana (that’s a new one for her) and there’s the French Kiss for Beth. The Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Edge and Miz gives us a shocked face. Beth is back up though and a double spear cuts Miz down. Mostly stereo Glam Slams give Edge the pin at 12:28.

Rating: C. Here is another match where it could have used some chicanery with Miz and Maryse cheating as much as they could have to win the thing and instead they played it pretty straight. The idea of battling couples works, but Edge and Beth aren’t going to lose to Miz and Maryse without all kinds of cheating and everyone knew it. Not an awful match, but another boring one on a show full of them.

A recipient of the Congressional Medal of Honor is here so we hear his story.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with AJ Styles in at #1 (and strikes a Shawn Michaels pose for some reason) and Shinsuke Nakamura (Intercontinental Champion) in at #2, meaning Pat McAfee gets to dance on the announcers’ table. A strike off goes to Nakamura, who hits the spinwheel kick to the head but can’t exploder Styles out. Styles knocks him into the corner and it’s Austin Theory in at #3. The rolling dropkick hits Styles to start but Nakamura goes for Theory.

Robert Roode is in at #4 and hits some spinebusters but Styles cuts him off. Styles reverses a whip and sends Roode outside for the quick elimination. Ridge Holland, with face guard, is in at #5 to run some people over. Styles gets rid of Nakamura and goes after Theory as Montez Ford is in at #6. Ford throws Theory to the apron but can’t get rid of him. Instead Ford kicks away at Holland to little effect and US Champion Damien Priest is in at #7.

A bunch of stomping ensues until Sami Zayn is in at #8. More nothing ensues and it’s Johnny Knoxville in at #9. Knoxville takes Sami down and hammers away before going after Styles. The Phenomenal Blitz drops Knoxville fast and Ford adds the frog splash. Sami Helluva Kicks Knoxville out but Styles dumps Zayn for a bonus. Angelo Dawkins is in at #10, giving us Styles, Theory, Holland, Ford, Priest, and Dawkins. Omos is in at #11 and he should get to clear some of the ring. There goes Dawkins and Ford follows him rather quickly.

Ricochet is in at #12 and get chopped by Omos as NOTHING continues to happen. Chad Gable is in at #13 and rallies the troops to go after Omos, which means sending Priest after him alone. With Priest gone, the rest of the group, plus Dominik Mysterio in at #14, gets rid of Omos. Happy Corbin is in at #15 and dumps Ricochet pretty fast. Dolph Ziggler is in at #16 as this is reaching some incredible levels of boring. Deep Six plants Dominik and Corbin gets rid of him, followed by Styles getting rid of Theory.

Sheamus is in at #17, with Holland being tossed before Sheamus can get inside. Rick Boogs is in at #18 and McAfee is excited, as compared to the eerily still crowd. Boogs tosses Gable and Madcap Moss is in at #19. Corbin tosses Styles, ending a nearly thirty minute run with….nothing (that’s the story of the match so far: nothing happens, and we’re just sitting around waiting as more people come in and go out).

It’s Riddle in at #20, giving us Corbin, Ziggler, Sheamus, Boogs, Moss and Riddle as this drones on. Corbin and Moss get rid of Boogs and Drew McIntyre returns from injury at #21. McIntyre wastes no time in getting rid of Moss and Corbin, which would somehow carry on through Wrestlemania. That’s not enough though as Drew follows them outside and unloads on them with steps to the head. Kevin Owens is in at #22 and Pop Up Powerbombs McIntyre.

Rey Mysterio is in at #23 and the fans are barely reacting to a string of big, popular names. Kofi Kingston is in at #24 and gets tossed to the apron fast. Owens breaks up a springboard attempt and Kofi lands on the barricade….but his feet hit the floor as Kofi finally botches his big save spot. It’s Otis in at #25 and hits some elbows as the mindless brawling continues.

Big E. is in at #26 and oh yeah, he’s a former WWE Champion. Belly to belly suplexes abound and the Warrior Splash hits Owens. Bad Bunny gets lucky #27 and gets to clean house, including a high crossbody, followed by a Canadian Destroyer to Riddle. Bunny ducks the Brogue Kick and ducks Sheamus before teaming up with Rey to get rid of Ziggler. Mysterio turns his back on Bunny and almost gets tossed, leaving Owens to Stun Bunny instead. Otis dumps Mysterio and Shane McMahon is in at #28.

Shane wastes no time in getting rid of Owens before slugging it out with McIntyre. Randy Orton, the hometown boy, is in at #29 and the RKO gets rid of Big E. Another RKO hits Otis and Riddle hits a running RKO to McIntyre. Otis is out….and Brock Lesnar is in at #30, meaning everyone knows exactly where this is going. Lesnar gets to clean house, including a bunch of suplexes before dumping Orton and Bunny. Riddle is tossed, Shane follows him, and it’s down to Lesnar vs. McIntyre. Some right hands look to set up the Claymore but Lesnar reversed into the F5 to win at 51:11.

Rating: D-. This was HORRIBLE and is absolutely in the running for worst Royal Rumble of all time. There was no drama until the end, but the bigger problem is there was nothing set up throughout the match. This is the third time I’ve seen this match and I still have no idea what is supposed to be interesting until the end. People come in, they brawl, they get eliminated, more people come in. It’s about 50 minutes of absolute nothing and then “oh well, here’s Brock to get ANOTHER Wrestlemania title match after two minutes of work”. This felt like they didn’t try and just said “Lesnar wins, move on”. Absolutely horrendous.

Overall Rating: D-. I’ve heard this show called the lowest of the low for WWE creative in this era and that very well may be true. The ONLY decent thing on the entire show was Rollins vs. Reigns, and that ended in a screwy finish. You also have Lesnar vs. Lashley and that doesn’t even require creative to work. Instead, we had two terrible Rumbles, one of which is an all time miss, plus some nothing midcard matches. The Rumbles are always going to define these shows though and these were all time terrible. Horrific show and it gets worse every time I watch it.

 

Ratings Comparison

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B-
Redo: B

Women’s Royal Rumble:

Original: C-
Redo: D+.

Becky Lynch vs. Doudrop

Original: D+
Redo: C-

Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

Original: C
Redo: C

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: C+
Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C-
Redo: D-

WOW I have no idea what I was thinking on that Men’s Royal Rumble. That has to be up there on my all time list of stupid ratings.

 

Here is the original review if you need a recap.

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2022/01/30/royal-rumble-2022-at-least-something-caught-fire/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – July 11, 2008: The Not So Wedding Show

Smackdown
Date: July 11, 2008
Location: River Center, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these and I’m barely remembering what we’re dealing with at the moment. HHH is ready to defend the Smackdown World Title against Edge at the Great American Bash, though Edge and Vickie Guerrero are having some troubles, to the point where their wedding is off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge’s recent issues, from losing the World Title to CM Punk to his problems with Vickie Guerrero. Edge thinking that yelling at his boss/fiance was a good idea wasn’t his greatest moment.

Here is- Edge to get things going. He has had a week to think about what he said to Vickie Guerrero last week….and the wedding is STILL off. He’s happier without Vickie because he’s better than her. At the Great American Bash, he can prove everyone wrong by winning the World Title again.

He has won more titles than anyone else in this industry and he will prove how great he is again at the Great American Bash when he beats HHH. Cue Vickie Guerrero (Vickie: “Excuse me, baby.”) to say the wedding being canceled isn’t her loss. Vickie gives him a match tonight: a No DQ match against the Big Show. Edge says he isn’t afraid and promises to make Show a loser like her. Vickie has his mic cut off.

Video on Maria.

Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Matt takes him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Back up and Matt grabs a headlock for some careful grinding. Benjamin sends him into the corner and hits a neckbreaker for two. The neck crank goes on as Benjamin certainly has a target so far. That’s broken up and Benjamin misses the Stinger Splash, allowing Hardy to start the comeback.

It’s too early for the Twist of Fate so Hardy settles for a corner clothesline/bulldog. The top rope elbow to the back of the head gives Matt two but Benjamin is right back with the exploder for the same. Matt is back up to try the Twist of Fate but Benjamin grabs the rope and hits…well it was supposed to be Paydirt but Matt fell the wrong way, making it kind of a jumping clothesline. Either way, it gives Benjamin the upset pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a surprise and it was even a clean pin, which doesn’t make for the best future for Matt and the title. For now though, Benjamin getting a push isn’t a bad thing, but he couldn’t have put his feet on the ropes here? Nice job on the surprise pin, though I’m not wild on the way they got there.

The Edgeheads are in Vickie Guerrero’s office and say the three of them don’t deserve Edge’s abuse. Instead, they want to face Jesse and Festus, with Vickie making the match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Domino

MVP is on commentary and gets a few jabs from Kennedy during the pre-match chat. Kennedy takes him down to start and hits a corner clothesline, with Domino bailing out to the floor. Back in and Domino manages a quick slam and legdrop but Kennedy fights up again. Some elbows to the face and a running boot in the corner have Domino in trouble, setting up the Mic Check to give Kennedy the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this short here and that is how it should have gone as the point was for MVP and Kennedy to be in the same place, likely with something happening after the match. Both of them could use this feud as they could both go or a boost. Domino does not seem long for this place, as he could not have been more of a jobber here.

Post match Umaga runs in and wrecks Kennedy.

Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, gives Edge a pep talk and says he’s going to give Vickie Guerrero a piece of his mind.

Post break Chavo offers Vickie that piece of his mind….which is about how horrible Edge is and how the Guerreros have to stick together. Vickie doesn’t buy it (my goodness intelligence!) and gives Chavo a match with HHH instead.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Non-title. Finlay and Morrison start things off as JR goes on a mini rant about Edge and Vickie’s drama. Miz’s cheap shot earns him a flip over the top so Finlay beats up both of them at once. Hornswoggle comes in for some Stunners (JR: “Next thing you know he’ll be drinking beer!”) but a double dropkick cuts him off. An enziguri hits a kneeling Morrison though and it’s Finlay coming in to clean house. The Celtic Cross connects but Miz makes the save. That earns him a shillelagh shot, followed by the Tadpole Splash to give Hornswoggle the pin.

Rating: C. Nothing is getting a ton of time this week and that doesn’t exactly make me interested in seeing the longer form rematch. This probably sets up a pay per view title match and at least there was some cheating to get us to the rematch. It’s still a bad night for the champs though and that isn’t the best thing to see.

Video on Jeff Hardy’s Mission: Impossible themed photo shoot as he chases the World Title.

HHH vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. HHH fights out of a headlock to start and elbows him in the face, which does not sit well with Chavo early on. Chavo’s arm wringing gets him punched in the face and HHH starts in on the arm. Chavo comes back with some right hands and Neely’s cheap shot sets up a crossface chickenwing of all things. That’s broken up so HHH hits the running knee. The spinebuster cuts Chavo off again and, after decking Neely, HHH grabs the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion won for once, even if it was in another short match. Then again, it’s nice to have a showcase for the World Champion for a change as you don’t get to see that often enough. Chavo getting punished for trying to play Vickie and Edge at the same time was nice too and the match went well, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Natalya/Maryse

Michelle takes Maryse down to start as Foley explains how to pronounce Maryse. A dropkick gives Michelle two and it’s off to Cherry for a Hennig necksnap. Maryse runs over to bring in Natalya, who easily slams Cherry. Natalya gets in a kick to the leg and grabs the Sharpshooter for the fast pin. Did they suddenly get a go home cue or something?

Post match Natalya beats up Michelle and suplexes her on the floor.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Jesse slugs away at Hawkins to start and stomps him down in the corner. Ryder comes in but so does Festus with the latter getting to clean house. Festus clears the ring and Hawkins and Ryder just take the countout.

Post match the bell has turned Festus into a zombie again so Hawkins and Ryder beat down Jesse. They were being scientific….until Jesse rings the bell so Festus can wreck the villains.

Video on HHH.

Stevie Richards vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Kozlov has gained entrance music and runs him over with a shoulder to start. Some knees to the ribs and a fireman’s carry put Richards down and we hit the bodyscissors. Back up and Richards hammers away, only to get headbutted down for the pin.

Edge yells at Chavo Guerrero until the Edgeheads come in. The argument keeps going until Vickie Guerrero comes in. If anyone else tries to help Edge, or if Edge walks out on the match, they’re fired.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Edge vs. Big Show

No DQ and Vickie Guerrero is watching from the stage. Show starts fast and takes him to the floor for a ram into the barricade. The announcers’ table takes too long to load up though and Edge gets in a quick spear as we take an early break. Back with Show cutting off a kendo stick shot and throwing Edge into the steps and over the barricade without much effort. Edge comes back with a bulldog off of said barricade and they both get a breather.

A kendo stick to Show’s head lets them go back inside, where Edge’s choke manages to take Show down again. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex but the chokeslam is countered into a DDT. Edge brings in a chair but charges a bit too hard, allowing Show to punch it into his face. For some reason that doesn’t know Edge silly and he’s back with a low blow. The Conchairto is loaded up but Show is up with a chokeslam. Show loads up his own Conchairto, only to have Vickie say stop the match. The bell rings and Vickie comes in to check on Edge.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show street fight and that is probably something they have done more than once. The ending was more important though and that is going to lead to the next step in the rather long Edge/Vickie saga. Putting someone against Big Show is a pretty standard punishment, so everything here made sense, even if it wasn’t an instant classic.

Edge and Vickie reconcile to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The ending is the big story here as there wasn’t much else on the rest of the show. They did well enough with Edge and Vickie, but that’s about all there is on here, with even HHH not feeling that important. HHH vs. Edge/Vickie is a big time feud and having it take place at a mid level pay per view like the Great American Bash is certainly a weird choice. Smackdown needs another good story though as there just isn’t much going on around here.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 4, 2008: They Did It Better Than Raw

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2008
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

We’re into the new reality around here as both Night Of Champions and the full Draft are done. There is only one World Champion after Edge lost his title to CM Punk on Raw, meaning HHH is once again on top. Other than that, we should get to see how some of the new stars mesh with what’s left of the old. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the 4th of July and talks about how the wrestlers get to live the American Dream with live action fireworks.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP wastes no time in bringing out his guest, the still World Champion HHH. After a nice hello, MVP congratulates HHH on his win at Night Of Champions and welcomes him to Smackdown. It’s been a long time since HHH has been here but he is already a big fan of MVP. HHH appreciates the bling and the Power Ranger outfit that MVP wears when he wrestles.

MVP says it’s cutting edge technology and Olympians wear it to compete. HHH says that sounds like a performance enhancer and MVP might get thirty days off. With that shrugged off, MVP brings up that he makes more money than HHH, who could see how that would make some people angry. Not that it matters as he would rather be a 12 time World Champion rather than the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history.

HHH is out here to get a rub from MVP though and he has some special footage. MVP doesn’t like that, so he says let’s play footage instead. We get a recap of CM Punk winning the Raw World Title and retaining it over JBL in the main event, followed by a brawl with security to end the show. Back in the arena, HHH says Edge got Punked out and MVP says Edge got his punk card pulled.

The jokes continue until Vickie Guerrero, back in the wheelchair, interrupts. HHH wishes her well on her upcoming wedding. HHH: “Imagine: marrying the boss to get ahead. Who thinks up that kind of stuff?” HHH thinks she and Edge just need to go to Vegas because he knows a great drive thru place. You don’t even need to be conscious!

Vickie brags about Edge’s success against Batista, but HHH says looking at her, there are things Edge would do that HHH would never do. Vickie doesn’t get what he means but eventually tells him to shut up. Edge is on his way here and speaking of Edge, HHH will be defending the title against him at the Great American Bash.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria vs. Cherry vs. Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

Star on a pole match with the winner facing Natalya, on commentary and now a redhead, for the Divas Title. A quick brawl to start leaves Kelly as the only one standing but Victoria knocks her off the pole. Cherry cuts Victoria off before Maryse has to knock Michelle down. A double electric chair drops Maryse and Cherry catapults Kelly into the corner. Victoria adds the slingshot flipping legdrop to Cherry and goes up. That’s cut off as well so Michelle kicks Maryse down and wins.

Rating: D+. What are you supposed to say about this? It’s the kind of match that is all about one thing and not exactly having much to do with wrestling. This felt like something out of another company and it really doesn’t fit with what they’ve been trying with the women in recent weeks. Michelle finally gets put into the title match, which is long overdue as she has been the obvious pick for a long time now.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in to see Vickie Guerrero, who wants to know where Edge is. They don’t know, so she asks them about Edge losing the title on Raw. Vickie blames them both and gives them a match with Jesse and Festus. That’s a punishment?

Edge arrives and a lot of people look at him in silence.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Jesse And Festus

Festus is dressed as Uncle Sam. Hawkins and Ryder jump Festus to start and are quickly shrugged off, setting up a middle rope Hart Attack. Jesse has to fight out of a double team in the corner but gets pulled into another corner to begin the beating. Hawkins grabs a Russian legsweep for two and we hit the neck crank. Jesse is able to get over to the corner for the tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. With Hawkins sent to the floor, a seated senton and the fireman’s carry flapjack (with a great sell from Ryder) finishes for Festus.

Rating: C. This was in fact a Jesse and Festus match and that’s about as good as it’s going to get for them. The team isn’t overly interesting and the one joke of Festus losing it at the bell has long since used up its usefulness. It’s not like Hawkins and Ryder are great, but they’re a heck of a lot better than the other choice.

Post match Edge comes to the ring and beats on the catatonic Festus as Hawkins and Ryder make Jesse watch. Edge throws in a nasty chair shot to the head and stares down at Festus.

Post match Vickie Guerrero tries to calm Edge down but even the Great American Bash match doesn’t make it better. Vickie mentions giving him permission and Edge loses it, saying she doesn’t understand what is going on. He has been at this for sixteen years to the day but Vickie cuts him off, saying she is still his boss. She calls him a fool and Edge storms out.

Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison

Hardy shoves him down to start so Morrison grabs the arm to slow things down. Morrison gets sent outside and a slingshot dive….doesn’t launch as Hardy head fakes him instead, setting up a dive off the apron instead. Back in and Morrison hits a running knee to the face for two but the Flying Chuck misses. Hardy’s slingshot dropkick in the corner is broken up though and Morrison drops him out to the floor in a crash.

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on an armbar before blocking a Whisper In The Wind attempt. The armbar goes back on, allowing commentary to talk about Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Morrison cuts off a comeback attempt by sending him shoulder first into the post but Hardy counters a dive with a sitout powerbomb. Hardy fights up with some forearms and a cradle gets two. The Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two but Morrison Pele kicks him on top. The Moonlight Drive doesn’t work for Morrison though and it’s the Swanton to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was the “Hardy is here and he’s good on his own” match of the show. It worked well with these two showing the same chemistry they’ve had before, with Hardy showcasing his ability to fight from behind. Morrison feels good on his own too, making for a nice match.

Video on Maria.

Umaga vs. Funaki

Umaga wastes no time in knocking him into the corner and a superkick puts Funaki down as well. Foley even goes inter promotional by saying this is like Mark Henry beating up Colin Delaney on ECW. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike for the squash pin.

Edge is ranting to Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder when he is told that Vickie Guerrero wants to see him. He goes to Vickie’s office, where she goes on about how she is going to be in the wheelchair with back problems for life (keeping in mind that she was standing earlier tonight). Edge says not to talk to her in that gibberish, so Vickie screams at him to GET OUT. That’s exactly what he does, with the door closing behind him. Edge walks a bit, then turns around and tries to get back in, but the door is locked.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. It’s a brawl to start with Matt running Kennedy over but Kennedy is back up with a kick to the face. Kennedy clotheslines Chavo in the corner but Benjamin is back up with a kick of his own. Chavo is back up to take Benjamin down, only to have Benjamin toss him into the air for a nasty crash. Matt and Kennedy put the other two down before knocking each other down as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy cleaning house as Foley compares this to Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. Everyone but Chavo is caught in a Tower Of Doom but Benjamin is up to suplex Chavo down. Neely distracts Benjamin though and Chavo gets to Three Amigos Matt. The frog splash gets two as Kennedy makes the save. Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate on Chavo before dropping Kennedy onto Neely. Benjamin comes in and gets Twist of Fated onto Chavo, with Matt pinning the latter to retain.

Rating: B-. I believe they call this a sprint, as they were packing in whatever they could for about ten minutes. The 4th of July aspect meant that this more or less had to be the main event and it was a good match as a result. Matt retaining is a fine way to go too, even if getting the US Title off of ECW is not a bad idea.

Here is Edge, without music, for a chat. Edge says this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was attacked twice on Raw and now he is going to get the World Title back at the Great American Bash. Ever since he came in here tonight, he was feeling the disrespect, including from Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder, who should have been trying to make him happy.

He didn’t even receive the support of Vickie Guerrero, who should be there for him in his time of need. Therefore, Edge is going to let us in on some dirty little secrets, but here is a screeching Vickie (walking) to interrupt. She asks what Edge is doing so Edge walks up to her. Edge says the wedding is off, leaving Vickie to scream a lot and take off her ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good enough here (ignoring the stupid women’s match) and having Edge’s breakdown throughout the show made it work better. They have at least a main event set for the Great American bash and there is time to set up the rest of the card. Nice show here, as they didn’t have a bad lull after getting the new roster set up.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 27, 2008: Find Your Balance

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,748
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

The Draft has come and gone and now we have a new lineup around here. Some of the moves should make for some nice changes, though this is also the go home show for Sunday’s Night Of Champions. It should be interesting to see what happens with the new stars and the old stories, though Night Of Champions could be quite the endpoint for a lot of stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Draft recap.

Vickie Guerrero is rather sad as we hear about Vince McMahon nearly being crushed during Million Dollar Mania. She hopes Vince isn’t confined to a wheelchair like she is. That moves us on to how great Smackdown is, because she and Edge are getting married soon. With that out of the way, here’s new broadcaster Jim Ross!

Here is HHH to get things going. He talks about how crazy Vince McMahon is and makes jokes about how everything came crashing down on him. Anyway, for the first time in six years, he’s part of Smackdown and he sees the familiar faces of Mick Foley and Jim Ross. HHH says jr would be the one person he would pick to bring here with him (JR: “Thank you.”) so he’s home.

HHH gets in the self described sucking up to the fans before getting to the self described shilling of Sunday’s pay per view. The title is what matters so here is Edge to interrupt. Edge says this is special and big because the two best around are in the ring. He’s heard rumors that they can’t get along but Edge thinks they can make it work. HHH says they both have massive egos and he can see that his is way bigger than Edge’s.

The other difference: HHH will still be champion after Night Of Champions. Edge points out that he can actually beat Batista, unlike HHH. This is Edge’s house and show, so HHH needs to show him some respect. Cue Batista to interrupt and spear Edge down without much trouble. Batista even steals the title for a bonus. That was kind of a cool segment, with the mini Evolution reunion working.

Kane/Big Show vs. MVP/Mark Henry

Henry has been added to the ECW Title match at Night Of Champions after beating Kane on ECW. Kane and MVP start things off with the latter kicking away at the legs until an uppercut drops MVP. It’s off to Show to unload in the corner and knock MVP down without much effort. Henry comes in to cut off the power advantage so it’s right back to Kane. It doesn’t go so well this time around as Henry takes him into the corner for a boot to the head from MVP. Kane fights up so MVP tells Henry to do this himself and leaves…but Henry throws him back inside. The chokeslam gives Kane the fast pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and Kane continuing his dominance of MVP is amusing for some reason. It makes sense to keep everyone but MVP strong as MVP doesn’t exactly have much going on at the moment. This was more about letting Kane get some heat back after his loss to Henry on ECW and it worked just fine all things considered.

Vickie Guerrero discusses wedding plans with Alicia Fox but Edge interrupts. Vickie tells him to not worry about Batista because he’ll be gone. He’ll even get the title back tonight.

Video on Umaga.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Ryder drives Finlay into the corner to start but an atomic drop breaks that up in a hurry. Hawkins comes in and misses a baseball slide, allowing Finlay to unload with forearms. Back up and Finlay sends Hawkins outside, setting up the Celtic Cross to Ryder. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come out for the staredown.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Edge grabs a drop toehold to continue to technical opening. Back up and Matt hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for two as commentary isn’t sure if that would be an upset (yes, it would be). We take a break and come back with Matt blocking the Edge-O-Matic. Edge gets sent outside and Matt nails a clothesline off the apron but a cheap shot cuts Matt off back inside.

Choking on the ropes sets up a running crotch attack to the back of the neck and Edge kicks him in the chest. The cravate has Matt in more trouble but he fights up and grabs the Side Effect for two. That lets Foley get in a Get Smart reference, making him all the more swell. A DDT gives Matt two but he misses the moonsault. Edge misses the spear but gets two off a backslide with his feet on his rope. Back up and the Twist of Fate is countered into the spear to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and the ending sequence was good. I’m not wild on seeing the US Champion losing but at least it was to someone higher up on the food chain. Edge gets some momentum heading into his title match on Sunday while Matt…eh he’s defending against Chavo Guerrero so he’ll be fine.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Victoria/Natalya Neidhart/Maryse

Michelle and Maryse start things off with Michelle cranking on the arm. Maryse immediately bails out to bring Victoria in, with Kelly coming in as well. Foley remembers wearing chaps like Kelly and JR backs away as fast as he can. Cherry comes in and bulldogs Kelly for two as they’re rapid firing through the tags. It’s back to Michelle for a basement dropkick on Natalya, who is right back with the a wheelbarrow hot shot. The surfboard has Michelle in more trouble, followed by the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a chinlock but Victoria comes in to cut Michelle off again. The standing moonsault gives Victoria two as Foley wants to see more of Kelly’s chaps. Foley: “I’m just trying to give you a little Jerry The King Lawler JR.” Kelly gets in a kick to the ribs, setting up one of the most freezing cold tags I’ve ever seen as Cherry comes in. A neckbreaker gets two on Maryse but Natalya gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Everything breaks down and Maryse rolls Cherry up for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly good and I have no idea why they haven’t just announced Michelle for the title match yet. She’s the most obvious pick they could have but they’re still playing the “who is it going to be” nonsense. Am I supposed to believe that Cherry is getting a title shot? Anyway, this match was pretty lame, as it was almost Michelle in a handicap match.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Domino

Kozlov powers him into the corner to start and works on the arm. A shot to the chest sets up an overhead belly to belly suplex but Domino manages to drop him with a jumping elbow. Back up and Kozlov kicks him in the face, setting up the reverse DDT for the pin, though he had to work a bit more here.

Rey Mysterio, on the way to the ring for his final Smackdown appearance, runs into Hornswoggle for some odd…uh, looking at each other.

Here is Rey Mysterio for his final Smackdown appearance. He came to Smackdown six years ago with a heart full of dreams. Thanks to the fans, he became Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion and the World Heavyweight Champion. Smackdown will always have a place in his heart but now he is heading to Raw. The fans are offered to come along with him and we get some nice words in Spanish to wrap things up.

Batista vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and then breaks up an early Batista Bomb attempt. A splash gives Umaga two and there’s a hard kick to the back of Batista’s head. Batista gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Umaga cuts off the comeback with a kick to the face and a jumping headbutt puts him down again. We’re off to another nerve hold but Batista fights up. A slam attempt doesn’t work so Umaga knocks him back into the corner to hammer away some more. Umaga misses a splash and hits the ring post though and there’s the spinebuster. Cue La Familia to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not the most exciting match here as Umaga almost squashed him until the run-in ending. Umaga needed the boost after spinning his wheels for a long time, though having him do this to the #1 contender was a little strange. The bigger problem here was the match being rather slow though as these two have never had much chemistry together.

Post match the big beatdown is on but HHH makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts here but it wasn’t their best show. The problem is they were trying to build to the show with the old lineup but then had to introduce the new wrestlers. That made for a weird balance and they only kind o pulled it off. Things will be in their new normal next week though and that should make things a lot better.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 16, 2008: Mama KB’s Birthday Bonanza

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 16, 2008
Location: E-Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s night two of Million Dollar Mania, which is likely going to mean a lot of sitting around while Vince McMahon talks on the phone. Other than that, we’re on the way towards Night Of Champions and things are heating up between John Cena and HHH. We’re also a week away from the Draft and that means things are going to be shaken up soon. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. Cena talks about how much he loves WWE and how there are moments that transcend time. Moments like Hulk Hogan slamming Andre the Giant, Shawn Michaels’ boyhood dream coming true, and the first time Steve Austin beat someone up. We are (less than) two weeks away from another one of those moments, when he defeats HHH at Night Of Champions to become WWE Champion.

Cue HHH to say this isn’t personal but he’s not sure how much he believes that. Last week, Cena cost HHH a match with Jeff Hardy. If that happens again, this is going to get really personal really fast. Cena brings up HHH knocking him off the announcers’ table last week but HHH knew he would fall off on his own anyway. We hear about HHH tapping at Wrestlemania, with HHH pointing out that IT WAS TWO YEARS AGO.

Cena says HHH may be champion, but until he beats Cena, it doesn’t matter. HHH mocks Cena for being a favorite of younger fans and THAT is enough to make Cena want to fight. A referee comes in but here is Vince McMahon to says not so fast, because this is about giving away money. As for the people in the ring, Cena is in a match right now.

John Cena vs. Umaga

Street fight. Cena tries a sunset lip of all things before going for the slam, with Umaga falling down on him instead. Umaga knocks him hard off the apron and we take a break. Back with Cena charging into a Samoan drop on the ramp but the running hip attack only hits post. Cena hits him with the microphone (there had to be better options) but Umaga plants him with the spinning Rock Bottom for two.

Umaga grabs a chair but Cena takes it away and puts him down instead. The Throwback and top rope Fameasser connect, only to have Cena fall down when trying the FU. A whip into the steps keeps Cena down so Umaga brings the steps inside, only to have Cena reverse into the FU for the pin.

Rating: C+. These two had some great chemistry together at one point and it was still there to a certain extent, but Umaga has fallen a very long way since the old days. Cena got a little something out of a win over the monster though and that was the point. I’m sure HHH will have a match of his own later on as it’s a good way to make both he and Cena look like stars.

Vince McMahon calls a fan and makes him bark like a dog, which is good for $125,000.

And now, a bikini contest between Maria, Eve Torres, Jillian Hall, Lena Yada, Layla, Melina and Maryse, with Charlie Haas of all people hosting. They all disrobe (well not Jillian, who would rather sing), get fifteen seconds each, and Maria wins.

Vince, money, $100,000, though the fan from North Carolina says Ric Flair is the most handsome man ever from the state. Vince lets him have the money anyway.

We look back at Chris Jericho injuring Shawn Michaels’ eye.

Jim Duggan comes out (both he and the 2×4 are in tuxedos) to help Vince McMahon give away $50,000 but the call goes to voicemail. Vince mocks the fan for blowing it so another fan wins instead.

Jeff Hardy vs. Carlito

Jeff starts fast by sending him outside for the slingshot dive. Back in and Carlito catches him in the ropes for the hanging swinging suplex. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Hardy’s back but it’s broken up rather quickly. Jeff misses a dropkick to give Carlito two but he’s right back with a jawbreaker to send Carlito flying. The Whisper In The Wind gets two and there’s the sitout gordbuster. The Twist of Fate into the Swanton finishes Carlito off.

Rating: B-. Nice match here, though they didn’t have much time to get very far. The interesting thing here though is that Hardy seems ready to move up to the main event scene. Last week he beat HHH and this week he gets a nice win over Carlito. He’s too big to be in the Intercontinental Title scene, so there isn’t much left for him to go but move up the ladder again. That could be a big deal, and we should be on the way.

Vince, $175,000 this time, but the fan has to sing part of the National Anthem.

Here is Chris Jericho to explain attacking Shawn Michaels last week because everyone has been getting on him about it. We see a clip of the attack and then Jericho blames the fans for changing. It wasn’t his fault that any of this had to happen but the fans are blaming him anyway. That means the fans don’t deserve to be saved anymore and he doesn’t need want them to cheer him anyway. They must want Shawn to come out here right now but it’s not going to happen.

Cue Ric Flair to interrupt and get in Jericho’s face to tell him to shut up. No he can’t wrestle anymore, but they can go to the parking lot and have a fight right now. They start heading to the back but Jericho runs into HHH, who thinks Jericho has been doing enough. Ever since Jericho came back, HHH has been wanting to make Jericho his business and now he wants a fight. Jericho backs down though and we take a break. Back with Flair still wanting to fight but Vince McMahon comes in to have him escorted out. Instead, Vince makes HHH vs. Jericho for tonight.

Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Cryme Tyme

Non-title. Ted DiBiase comes out to offer a distraction….and Holly rolls JTG up for the pin in about ten seconds. Well at least they didn’t lose again.

Vince, $16 to a North Carolina fan in honor of the 16 time World Champion Ric Flair.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Mr. Kennedy/Mickie James

This Kennedy vs. Burchill feud needs to wrap up already if they want Kennedy to be something. Kennedy starts fast with a backdrop and stomps away in the corner. Burchill isn’t having that and pulls him into a chinlock before grinding a forearm into Kennedy’s face. Back up and Kennedy hits a running boot in the corner but Katie tags herself in. The fight with Mickie is on with Mickie’s running basement dropkick getting two. The men brawl to the floor, leaving Mickie to miss the top rope Thesz press. Katie grabs a backbreaker for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Kennedy and Burchill didn’t do much here but this was about Katie getting another win over Mickie to set up a likely title match. It’s nice to see some fresh blood in the title picture and Katie has done well enough in her chances so far. I can’t imagine she wins the title, but so far so good.

Vince, $174,984 to a VERY excited fan.

Vince, $75,000.

Night Of Champions rundown.

John Cena wishes HHH luck.

Vince, $300,000. We’ll be doing this again next week.

HHH vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. HHH knocks him down a few times to start as Jericho can’t get much going early on. A whip into the post bangs up Jericho’s shoulder and he falls out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Jericho choking on the ropes and then standing on HHH’s back to choke some more. Jericho misses a charge though and HHH slugs away, only to have the facebuster blocked. The Walls don’t work either and HHH hits a spinebuster. Jericho can’t get the Walls or the Lionsault and they fight out to the floor. Cue Lance Cade of all people to jump HHH for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Another nice match and that’s kind of the point here. I can go for not having a champion lose clean in a thrown together match and they covered that well here. Throw in Cade joining Jericho out of nowhere and things were certainly interesting. They covered a few things here and that’s nice to see for a main event.

Post match the beatdown is on but John Cena runs in for the save. HHH and Cena get in a fight but Jericho and Cade take them both out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The action was good and they’re turning Night Of Champions into something big, but at the end of the day, the Vince money stuff is getting annoying fast. They’re trying to throw in some jokes here and there but there is only so much that can be done with someone getting a phone call, saying a password, and winning money. Next week is the Draft though and that should change things up more than enough.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 13, 2008: They Need More

Smackdown
Date: June 13, 2008
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re well on the way to Night Of Champions and Batista is the new #1 contender to Edge’s Smackdown World Title. That alone should make for a good build towards the show, but we’re going to need more than that. Smackdown’s midcard might not be the strongest, but I’m sure we’ll have some Chuck Palumbo involved. Let’s get to it.

Vickie Guerrero is in the ring and we’re starting big with a contract signing. Batista comes out first but won’t sit down, even after Vickie offers him the chance. Vickie hypes up Edge a bit but since he has already signed the contract, he won’t be needed at the moment. She signs as well and tells Batista he needs to, but then won’t hand it over. Apparently Batista has to beat Great Khali tonight to really become #1 contender. That’s fine with Batista, who calls Vickie ugly and leaves. Hold on though as Vickie says if Batista loses tonight, he’s out of WWE. Vickie: “You’re dismissed.”

Finlay vs. John Morrison

Hornswoggle and Miz are here and this is a rather unique match. Finlay runs him over with a shoulder to start so Morrison heads to the floor. A legsweep takes Finlay down for a change but he ties Morrison up in the ring skirt. Hornswoggle is thrown at Miz to break up some interference but Morrison scores with a kick to take over. We hit the chinlock back inside before a neckbreaker gives Morrison two more. Finlay comes back with some clotheslines but Miz goes after Hornswoggle again. That’s enough of a distraction for Morrison to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. I could go for more of these two but this was more about setting things up for later. Finlay and Hornswoggle are at least a fresh team but I’m not sure I’d get behind the idea of them as serious challengers. Granted that might not be the case anytime soon as Finlay lost here, though I do like seeing a fresh match.

We’ll be looking at some classic Batista moments, like winning the 2005 Royal Rumble.

Edge likes the idea of honoring Batista before he’s gone from WWE, just like he did with Undertaker. Cue CM Punk to hint at cashing in the Money In The Bank briefcase at Edge’s wedding next month.

Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Before the match, we see a clip of Henry promising to give Big Show another black eye at Night Of Champions. Henry shoves him into the corner without much trouble to start and knocks him down for a kick to the back. There’s another slam to set up a headbutt in the corner as this is total destruction. Dreamer gets a boot up in the corner and slugs away but the DDT is blocked. The World’s Strongest Slam finishes Dreamer without much trouble.

Edge comes in to see Vickie Guerrero, who is planning her wedding with wedding planner Alicia Fox. He’s worried about the threat of a CM Punk cash-in but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP wants to renegotiate his contract because his talents are being underutilized. Edge doesn’t want to hear it so MVP says he could take the title. Anyway, he wants a new contract but Vickie points out that Teddy Long gave him the original. She’ll consider it…if he takes care of this CM Punk issue. Works for MVP.

Cherry vs. Maryse

Cherry takes her down and hammers away to start so Maryse bails into the corner. Back up and Maryse kicks the leg out to take over and we hit the cravate. Cherry fights up and slugs away, setting up a hammerlock DDT for the fast pin. Not much to this one.

Video on the Great Khali.

MVP vs. CM Punk

Punk wrestles him to the mat to start before grabbing a headlock. MVP reverses into one of his own for a bit, only to have Punk pop up. A spinwheel kick drops MVP and we hit the chinlock again. MVP slips out and grabs an armbar and cranks away for a bit. Punk is able to fight out with his good arm as they’re certainly not breaking out of second gear so far.

A missed charge sends Punk’s bad arm into the post and MVP sends it in twice more. We take a break and come back with MVP hammering away and grabbing a Fujiwara armbar. Punk fights out so MVP puts on another armbar. Back up again and Punk is able to hit a kick to the head for two and a hurricanrana gets the same.

Punk goes up top but the elbow only hits raised knees. With nothing else working, MVP pulls off a turnbuckle pad and uses the distraction to grab the Money In The Bank briefcase. Punk scores with the jumping knee to the head and takes the briefcase back (it’s his after all) but the referee sees it and calls the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was the wrestling match of the show and it got a lot of time, but the armbars took up a good bit of the time. They made sense given what MVP was tasked with doing but that didn’t make for an interesting match. At least Punk didn’t get pinned again, as they seem to be getting close to the cash-in, or certainly teasing the heck out of the thing.

Video on Edge winning the World Title by beating Undertaker in a TLC match.

Here is Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, to announce that he will be Edge’s best man. In addition, at Night Of Champions, he’ll beat Matt Hardy for the US Title!

Matt Hardy vs. Chuck Palumbo

Non-title. Palumbo powers him into the corner to start and kicks Matt outside. Back in and Palumbo hits a belly to back suplex into a chinlock as the pace stays slow. Palumbo misses a top rope legdrop for two and Matt grabs the Side Effect for two. The Twist of Fate finishes Palumbo soon after.

Rating: C. Palumbo continues to hang around and he’s oddly starting to grow on me. At the end of the day, he’s never going to be a big star but he’s someone who can handle a middle of the road spot like this and do just fine. That’s a role that you need to have on any show and Palumbo, while not great, is doing it well enough.

Video on Batista winning his first World Title at Wrestlemania XXI.

Video on the first week of Million Dollar Mania.

Vladimir Kozlov is asked about better competition and answers in Russian.

Video on Batista winning the World Title at Survivor Series 2006.

Jesse & Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Festus runs both of them outside to start before Jesse drop toeholds Deuce down to start. Jesse gets taken into the corner though and the double teaming is on quickly. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Jesse kicks his way out. Festus comes back in to clean house, including an uppercut to Domino. A sitdown splash gives Festus the pin.

Rating: C-. These teams feel like they have been fighting each other in circles for months and neither has shown any signs of moving up the ladder. At some point you need to do something that actually matters or otherwise this is just filler. The Festus Is A Monster deal has gone about as far as it can and it’s not getting any better. In other words, it’s a WWE tag team problem, as they continue to prove why there isn’t enough depth for two sets of titles.

Post match Deuce N Domino go at it, with Domino getting the better of things and walking off. And the depth lowers again.

Video on Batista vs. Great Khali from 2007.

Batista vs. Great Khali

If Batista wins he gets a Night Of Champions title shot but if he loses, he’s fired. Edge and Vickie Guerrero come out to watch as Khali chops away in the corner. Batista tries to fight back and we take a break. Back with Khali headbutting him to the floor before dropping the leg. Khali hits the elbow in the corner but Batista reverses for the shoulders to the ribs. The chokebomb gets two and we hit the nerve hold. Batista fights up and blocks the chop, setting up the sear for the fast pin.

Rating: C. As usual, keeping things short is the right way to go for Khali and Batista gets the win to set up the title match. It wasn’t the most interesting drama but they were in and out of there in about five minutes. They built it up over one night but it worked out well enough for a single night main event.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was almost all about setting up the Batista vs. Edge match and it went well enough. That being said, they needed something else to make things interesting and that was lacking pretty badly. Smackdown doesn’t have the most depth in the storyline department at the moment and as has been the case for a long time now, they need to work on that.

 

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Monday Night Raw – August 16, 2010: A Very Themed Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 16, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This was a request for reasons not quite clear. It’s night after Summerslam and the big story is John Cena and company vanquished the Nexus, in a match that saw Cena overcome some rather insane odds. Other than that, Sheamus is still Raw World Champion, having retained the title over Randy Orton. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here is the Nexus to get things going, with commentary saying that the team showed they belong despite losing last night. Wade Barrett (the team’s leader) says they beat SIX of the best that Raw had to offer last night (keep in mind that it was a 7 on 7 tag match) and they are still ready to dominate WWE. They were defeated and that means there will be consequences for Raw.

Cue John Cena, to say that Barrett has the resolve of Winston Churchill and the toughness of Snooki from the Jersey Shore. Cena brings up how Barrett tapped out to cause the team to lose. The reality is that Nexus is expendable and Barrett must be kicking himself in the fish and chips over letting Daniel Bryan go. Then last night Bryan eliminated over half of the Nexus by himself as they proved that Nexus can be defeated.

You have the various members of the team, such as Otunga (an above average male escort), Tarver (looks like a stripper), Heath Slater (the chick from Wendy’s…..so Wendy), Darren Young (a cross between Cena and Buckwheat), Justin Gabriel (he has an “alternative” way of thinking) and Skip Sheffield (who thinks the Meow Mix theme).

All that matters is they are a bunch of humans, with Young tapping out in less than a minute. We get an email from the anonymous Raw General Manager (egads the flashbacks), saying tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a bunch of singles matches, with threats made against Nexus interference.

Barrett doesn’t like hearing that he tapped out, but promises that after tonight, Nexus will be stronger than ever. If any of them lose though, their spots might not be safe. Otunga says that’s fine, but if Barrett loses, someone else can step up and take the leadership. We get another email, saying Nexus can pick their matchups tonight. Except for Barrett that is, because he gets to face Chris Jericho. So there’s your show tonight, and they did it in about fifteen minutes. That’s fairly fast for some Raw opening segments.

Chris Jericho vs. Wade Barrett

Jericho kicks him down to start as the rest of Nexus is shown watching in the back. There’s the triangle dropkick to send Barrett outside but he’s able to knock Jericho off the apron for a breather. There’s a big boot to drop Jericho again and we hit the double arm crank. Jericho fights up and hits a middle rope dropkick, followed by the bulldog. A quick Wasteland attempt is countered into the Walls, sending Barrett straight to the rope. Back up and Jericho boots him in the face again, only to get caught with an enziguri. The Codebreaker is loaded up but Barrett reverses into the Wasteland for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. Jericho can be criticized for a lot of things, but he has a reputation as someone who will put just about anyone over. That is a big win for Barrett, especially after last night’s big loss. Barrett being able to hang with someone at Jericho’s level helps him a lot and they had a good match to show what Barrett can do.

This week’s guest hosts are Jason Sudekis, Charlie Day and Justin Long. They have a new moving coming out and seemingly have no idea what to talk about here so they just make weird noises. We hear some NBA insults before the team introduces the Hart Dynasty (Tag Team Champions).

Hold on though as we get another email. As of tonight, the Unified Tag Team Titles will now be known as the WWE Tag Team Titles, so here is Bret Hart with the new (bronze, because of course) titles. Thankfully that means dropping the dumb four belts for two people idea but here is Nexus on the screen. They have picked Hart’s opponent for tonight: Justin Gable, who promises a 450 to Bret. At least those morons were off quick.

We hear about Daniel Bryan replacing the injured Great Khali on Team WWE. No clip for that?

Michael Tarver vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan goes after the arm to start as Cole goes off about Bryan having no skill or change of becoming a star because he doesn’t eat meat. The rapid fire kicks to the chest in the corner have Tarver in more trouble and a missile dropkick makes it worse. Cue Miz and Alex Riley for a distraction though, allowing Tarver to get the fast rollup pin.

Post match Bryan goes after the Miz but Riley and Tarver take him down. The Skull Crushing Finale onto Miz’s Money In The Bank briefcase leaves Bryan laying.

Post break Miz and Riley talk about how they don’t like Bryan’s popularity, with Miz promising that Riley will be the next breakout star.

Darren Young tells Nexus that he’ll be facing John Cena. Pep talking ensues.

Justin Gabriel vs. Bret Hart

Actually hold on as we get an email saying there is a replacement.

Justin Gabriel vs. Randy Orton

Orton (in his weird bare arms phase) powers him into the corner to start but Gabriel flips over him and starts kicking away. As Lawler tries to figure out what kind of animal Gabriel is poking here (before finally remembering the whole VIPER thing), Orton snaps off the powerslam and the hanging DDT. The RKO is loaded up but cue Sheamus for….not a DQ as Orton brawls with him into the crowd for the countout instead. Well that was a dumb way out of the stipulation.

Post match Orton goes back inside to RKO Gabriel. With that not being enough, Orton grabs a chair and unloads on Sheamus to blow off some steam. That’s not enough so Orton drops Sheamus with the RKO on the floor for a bonus.

Skip Sheffield/David Otunga vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

Morrison works on Otunga’s arm to start before grabbing a Russian legsweep. It’s off to Sheffield to powerslam Truth but Otunga comes back in and gets Downward Spiraled. Cole asks what a Truth/Morrison win would mean for the locker room’s psyche. I’m thinking….not much? Anyway Morrison comes back in to pick up the pace but Sheffield runs him over. One heck of a running clothesline finishes Morrison to keep Nexus undefeated.

Melina/Eve Torres/Gail Kim vs. Jillian/Maryse/Alicia Fox

Gail easily takes Maryse down to start and calls her a gold digger. A crossbody gives Gail two and it’s off to Melina, who is taken into the wrong corner. Fox hits her always nice looking northern lights suplex and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up and Eve comes in with a bunch of dropkicks. Everything breaks down and Eve hits an enziguri out of the corner to drop Jillian. The moonsault is loaded up but Jillian rolls her up out of the corner for the big upset pin.

Edge isn’t surprised that he led Team WWE to victory last night but here is Heath Slater to interrupt. They’re facing each other tonight and Heath tries to get him to back out. That’s not going to work for Edge, who isn’t losing to a Wendy looking Edge wannabe. Heath decks him and leaves.

Edge vs. Heath Slater

Edge knocks him into the corner without too much trouble to start but Heath gets in a cheap shot. They head outside with Edge being sent into the barricade, followed by the armbar back inside. That’s broken up and Edge makes the clothesline comeback for two. Heath gets in his own clothesline for two, with a fan shouting “I HATE YOU HEATH SLATER! I HATE YOU!” Back up and Edge sends him (Heath, not the fan) outside but misses the baseball slide dropkick. The spear against the steps misses….and Heath beats the count back inside for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well that was nothing, but it’s getting more than a little tough to accept that after eliminating all seven members last night, Team WWE can’t beat a single member of the Nexus here. That doesn’t makes the most sense and it’s leading to some rather screwy finishes. This didn’t feel like something Edge would ever fall for and it’s not something I would buy him doing, which doesn’t exactly make for a strong finish.

Post match Edge hits a spear to blow off some steam.

The hosts are in the back with Great Khali and talk about long distances relationships (which is why Khali hasn’t been doing the Kiss Cam). Justin Long sees a picture of Khali’s girlfriend and the other hosts aren’t impressed. They then find out that Khali understands English, but he admits the girlfriend is ugly. Then he leaves with the Bellas. Cole: “WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?”

Video on Summerslam week, including a bunch of charity stuff.

John Cena vs. Darren Young

No entrance for Young and that can’t be a good sign. Hold on though as cue Nexus to watch from the stage and Young gets two off a fast rollup to start. Young grabs a headlock and my goodness you can hear the spots being called despite a fairly rowdy crowd. Cena reverses into a headlock of his own but gets suplexed down, setting up a legdrop for two more. Cole: “Remember Young has to win this match.” Lawler: “I think Cena has to win this match.” Cole: “I agree with you.”

A clothesline and neckbreaker give Young two each and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Back up and Cena….charges into an elbow in the corner as this has been one sided so far. Young drops a leg, Cena says “one more leg”, Young drops another leg. A northern lights suplex gets two more and Young is getting frustrated. With nothing else working, Young tosses him outside and then into the steps for a nine count. Back in and Cena quickly starts the comeback, setting up the Shuffle into the STFU for the tap.

Rating: C+. For someone who almost never got used on his own, Young can wrestle a decent match when he is given the chance. Granted having Cena call spots REALLY LOUDLY might have helped, but it was the best Young ever looked in WWE. At some point someone from Nexus had to lose and Young was the only one left by the end.

Post match the Nexus comes to the ring but let Cena go, instead circling Young. The big beatdown is on, with the Wasteland into the 450 splash destroying Young to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Normally I like the idea of focusing on one thing throughout the show but this was extreme even by WWE standards. Other than the women’s match and some dumb stuff with the hosts, this was all about one storyline. Throw in Nexus dominating most of the show and this wasn’t exactly interesting, with Nexus dominating most of the show despite losing last night. Not a good show, as the Nexus story was instantly a lot lamer after the Summerslam loss. Focusing on a big story is fine, but you have to mix it up a bit.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Smackdown – June 6, 2008: It’s Something New

Smackdown
Date: June 6, 2008
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We FINALLY have a new Smackdown World Champion as Edge (with all of his friends helping) defeated Undertaker in a TLC match to win the title. In addition, Undertaker is officially gone from WWE and I know Edge won’t be bragging about that in the slightest. We are less than a month away from Night Of Champions and that show could use some attention. Let’s get to it.

Here is One Night Stand if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of TLC, with Edge stealing the title. Actually not really as anything goes, so I guess it was clean? Kind of?

La Familia is in the ring, with Vickie Guerrero (back in the wheelchair after walking at One Night Stand) introducing Edge to quite the negative reception. They all have champagne as Edge thanks everyone, but especially Vickie herself. Edge talks about how Vickie completes him, because she made this happen. As for Undertaker, Edge would have run him out of here anyway so Undertaker should thank him. Edge: “May he rest in peace.”

Vickie announces that she and Edge are getting married in five weeks on July 11, but cue Batista to interrupt. Batista doesn’t know why he wasn’t invited to the party but he just wants to wish them luck. Actually he just wants to wish them bad luck and ugly kids because he doesn’t like either of them!

Either way, he wants a World Title shot, but Vickie gives him an eight man tag tonight where he can face La Familia while teaming with three partners…of Vickie’s choosing. Oh and if he loses, no title shots EVER! They certainly hit the ground running here after One Night Stand and that is a good thing, as Edge really needed to face someone new after that never ending feud with Undertaker.

Finlay vs. Chuck Palumbo

This is a Belfast Brawl (street fight) with Hornswoggle in Finlay’s corner. Hornswoggle goes after Palumbo’s bike and gets shoved down to start, meaning Finlay is ready to fight fast. Palumbo gets in a few right hands on the floor and it’s already time for some weapons. A drop toehold sends Palumbo face first into a trashcan but he’s back up with a right hand. Palumbo takes off a turnbuckle pad so Finlay gets the shillelagh, earning himself a big boot. With Finlay down, Palumbo loads up a chain but Hornswoggle hits him low, allowing Finlay to get in a chain shot to win.

Rating: C. That should end the feud but it’s kind of amazing to see how much Palumbo has gotten out of the whole thing. Finlay never was able to get the better of him without help and Palumbo dominated a lot of their time together. Not great here, but you’re only getting so much out of a five minute street fight.

MVP is in a sky box and doesn’t seem pleased with Finlay and Hornswoggle.

Here is Big Show, with a heck of a black eye, to brag about winning the Singapore cane match and say he’s on to a bigger challenge in Kane. Cue Mark Henry to interrupt because he remembered Show telling him to pick on someone his own size. Then he got involved in a match involving STICKS. Show got beaten up to look like that, and we see Show going face first into the steps to bang up his eye. Show is ready to fight but Henry walks away.

We see WWE accepting an award at a film festival involving the military. I believe we saw this a few weeks ago.

Great Khali vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce starts for the team and is promptly caught in the claw. Domino comes in and gets kicked in the face so they’ll try some double teaming. Khali has no time for this and hits a pair of chokebombs for the pin. Total destruction.

Vickie Guerrero talks to the Divas and compares herself to the Fabulous Moolah. She wants her own Women’s Champion though, so the Divas Title is coming. Tonight, we’ll crown one of the competitors. This has to happen as you can only have random matches for personal issues for so long.

We recap Jimmy Kimmel’s Cousin Sal, as trained by Roddy Piper, vs. Santino Marella. A lot of this is cut off of Peacock, likely due to trademarked footage.

Santino Marella vs. Cousin Sal

Roddy Piper and Jimmy Kimmel is here with Sal, who is in a kilt. Sarah Silverman is here in the crowd for a bonus. They circle each other to start as we hear about how much Sal has waned to do this over the years. Sal grabs a headlock and Santino might need to rethink this. We get the airplane spin and a suplex for two on Santino as Kimmel looks like he’s seeing an amusing dog trick. Kimmel offers a distraction and Sal gets a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. I almost didn’t rate this but it was officially a match. No this wasn’t anything from a quality standpoint and that wasn’t why they did it. This got them on Jimmy Kimmel Live and tied some things into that with the Piper appearance so it’s hard to complain. Nothing match, but they were in and out in less than six minutes.

Post match Santino jumps Sal but Piper saves Kimmel.

MVP is still not impressed.

Post break Sal is getting checked out by Kimmel, who won’t let Sal talk for some reason. Kimmel has Sal’s next opponent, and brings in Big Show for some clowning.

Miz and John Morrison mock Hornswoggle but Finlay comes in (complete with green hat) to scare them off.

Edge talks to Chavo Guerrero, who he wants to be the best man. He’s going to be Uncle Edge after all! Chavo is in and we get an awkward hug.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla vs. Maryse vs. Cherry vs. Natalya vs. Victoria vs. Michelle McCool

This is the Golden Dreams match, meaning there’s a gold star on a pole and the winner is in the Divas Title match. Everyone goes for the pole to start and that quickly devolves into a huge brawl. The ring is cleared save for Michelle and Natalya, with Michelle kicking her out and going up. Maryse makes the save, followed by Layla and Victoria doing the save. Natalya powerbombs Victoria and Michelle down and grabs the star for the title shot.

Million Dollar Mania press conference video.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Kozlov grabs a front facelock to start before kicking Yang in the face. The half crab goes on so Kozlov can yell a lot but he misses an elbow. Yang kicks him in the head, only to miss an elbow. Kozlov finishes with a belly to belly.

Batista is ready for Edge and company.

La Familia vs. Batista/???/???/???

Batista’s partners are Nunzio, Funaki and Colin Delaney. Batista and Ryder start things off with Batista not having much trouble. Chavo comes in and gets Jackhammered for two so Batista Rocket Launchers Delaney onto Chavo for two more. We take a break and come back with the villains taking turns on Delaney.

Edge grabs a headlock and forces Delaney to tag Funaki (sidenote: Foley points out that Nunzio and Funaki are former Cruiserweight Champions and very well could cancel out the Edgeheads. That might not be the story they are going for, but it’s accurate.), who gets beaten down for a change. Ryder’s chinlock goes on before it’s back to Edge, who counters the tornado DDT without much trouble. Funaki avoids a charge and Batista gets the tag to clean house. Edge breaks up the Batista Bomb and everything breaks down. Batista hits a double spear and the Batista Bomb finishes Hawkins.

Rating: C+. They were telling a story with Batista overcoming the odds here and, as Foley pointed out, Nunzio and Funaki have had some success before so they could have been worse. Batista getting the win should set him up for Night Of Champions, but odds are he has some more hoops to clear first. As commentary was pointing out though, with Undertaker gone, who else is there to come after Edge?

Overall Rating: C. The idea of Edge vs. Batista is nice and they do need a Women’s Title here, but the rest of the show wasn’t exactly must see. You had a bunch of short matches, including the pole match, and that doesn’t exactly make for a strong middle of the card. There are worse shows, but this didn’t give me confidence on the way to Night Of Champions.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 30, 2008: Of The Indiana Edges?

Smackdown
Date: May 30, 2008
Location: World Arena, Colorado Springs, Colorado
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

It’s the final show before One Night Stand and as was the case last week, the show is completely set up. There isn’t much more than needs to be said around here as Edge vs. Undertaker in a TLC match sells itself. Other than that, Batista vs. Shawn Michaels in a stretcher match is already there so it should be time for the big final push towards Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Edge joins us to start and says he will be introducing a series of clips of the Undertaker throughout the night, because this will be Undertaker’s last night on Smackdown. It will also be his first time on the Cutting Edge, which could be fascinating. Ok more like moderately interesting but fascinating sounds better.

Opening sequence.

Here is Batista to get things going and the fans seem rather happy to see him. Batista doesn’t have much to say because the time for talking is LONG gone. If nothing else, he is a man of his word and on Sunday he is going to hurt Shawn Michaels. Some people will have a problem with that but he hopes they can find it in their hearts to forgive him. After that, the winner of the TLC match between Batista and Undertaker….and here is Vickie Guerrero, with the Edgeheads, to cut him off.

Vickie says that it’s great for Batista to be looking at the future, but maybe he’ll be drafted to Raw. On top of that, what if he loses to Shawn Michaels and his bag of trick (Bag of tricks?)? He would humiliate all of Smackdown and VICKIE WOULD LOOK BAD! Batista cuts off whatever she is demanding and says this has nothing to do with her. This is about Batista vs. Shawn Michaels so go worry about Edge. The Edgeheads are ready to fight, but Vickie makes a tag match later, with Batista getting to pick his partner.

We look at Undertaker debuting at Survivor Series 1990.

Matt Hardy vs. Elijah Burke

Non-title. Burke knocks him into the corner to start but Hardy slugs his way out of trouble. That earns Hardy the Four Up before Burke rains down more right hands. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Hardy fights up. Burke drops him with a clothesline for two and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Hardy’s back. Hardy finally suplexes his way to freedom but it’s too early for the middle rope elbow. Instead Hardy settles for two off a Side Effect but Burke blocks the bulldog out of the corner. Not that it matters as Hardy grabs the Twist of Fate for the pin.

Rating: C. Not much to see here as they only had so much time and a lot of it was spent on punches. This felt like a way to get Hardy on the show but it would have been nice if the match had been a bit better. Burke has been pretty much nothing for a good while now so the title not being on the line here made a bit more sense.

MVP says no one cares about Matt Hardy but Jamie Noble interrupts. Noble thinks they’re a lot alike but MVP doesn’t want to hear it. A match is made for later.

Finlay vs. Chuck Palumbo

Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Palumbo kicks away to start and hits a heck of a right hand in the corner. Finlay ducks a charge though and Palumbo goes shoulder first into the post. Some arm cranking ensues and they head outside with Finlay sending him arm first into the steps. Back in and Palumbo hits one heck of a big boot for two, with Finlay’s arms rolling back into his head. Finlay’s eyes are fine enough to see Palumbo going to the floor off a running clothesline. That means it’s time to go after Hornswoggle, followed by a chain to Finlay’s face for the DQ.

Rating: C. Well they’re certainly trying with Palumbo and having him take it to Finlay like this was a good way to go. They’re having a nice enough mini feud and even though I don’t think it’s going to be some big breakthrough for Palumbo, I can go for some fresh feuds like this one. Just throw some people out there and see what happens.

Jamie Nobel comes into Vickie Guerrero’s office and is granted a match with MVP without much trouble. He thinks its too simple so Vickie and the Edgeheads tell him to get out.

We look at Undertaker throwing Mankind off of the Cell. Foley being on commentary to talk about how important that was helps a bit.

John Morrison vs. CM Punk

The Miz is here with Morrison. Well in theory at least as the referee ejects him before the bell. Punk grabs a fast rollup for two before kicking Morrison down. Back up and Morrison hits a running shoulder, setting up a kick to the head for two. A seated full nelson goes on but Punk is right back up with the running knee into the corner. The bulldog back out of the corner gets two but Morrison cuts him off again. Punk is fine enough to reverse a suplex though and the GTS is good for the fast pin.

Batista/??? vs. Edgeheads

Batista…doesn’t need a partner so here is Vickie to say this can be a handicap match. Actually scratch that, as Batista said he doesn’t need a partner, but he does have one.

Batista/Big Show vs. Edgeheads

Show wheels Vickie to the back before heading to the ring. Hawkins slugs away at Batista to start and is quickly run over. Batista drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs and Show adds the chop. It’s off to Ryder, who is pulled in (by the head, off the floor) for one heck of a chop. Batista easily fights out of the corner and a cheap shot just earn Hawkins a spinebuster. The chokeslam finishes as Show chokeslams Ryder for a bonus.

Rating: C-. Total squash here, and what els were you expecting it to be? Batista winning this on his own wouldn’t have been a stretch so bringing in a fellow monster like Show made it some entertaining destruction. I’m not sure how much it helps get them ready for their One Night Stand matches, but at least they got to do this first.

We look at Undertaker winning the 2007 Royal Rumble after an incredible finish with Shawn Michaels.

Cherry is rather banged up after Maryse kicked her in the face last week. Maryse comes into the trainer’s room and says she hurt her ankle…when she kicked Cherry.

One Night Stand rundown.

MVP vs. Jamie Noble

MVP stomps him down in the corner to start but Noble grabs a leglock. A shot to the ribs and a faceplant bangs up said ribs even more. Noble gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the abdominal stretch. The big kick to the head is cut of with a kick to MVP’s knee though and a Cannonball (“Throwing your body at your opponent” according to Cole or “upside down back spasm” according to Mick.) rocks him again. A high crossbody hits Noble but MVP drops him ribs first across the top. The big boot finishes Noble.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting as Noble was working (as usual) and they even had something of a story between the ribs vs. knee. This was a match that got more effort than it probably needed but it wound up being pretty nice. MVP needs something to do, though I’m not sure what that could be at the moment.

Undertaker beat Batista at Wrestlemania XXIII.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Shannon Moore

Kozlov chops him down without much trouble. Moore fights back but gets knocked out of the air. A belly to belly overhead suplex sets up the reverse DDT to keep Kozlov undefeated.

Vince McMahon is giving away money starting next week on Raw.

Michelle McCool vs. Maryse

Deuce N Domino are here with Maryse. McCool fireman’s carries her down, with Foley saying that’s the same thing he used to do. A sunset flip doesn’t work for Maryse as McCool rolls through and hits a basement dropkick. Back up and Maryse chokes in the corner but gets knocked down again. Deuce N Domino offer a distraction so Maryse can take out the let and grab a half crab. Cue Cherry for a distraction though, allowing McCool to switch into a heel hook for the fast tap. These matches still aren’t great, but you can see McCool getting better.

We look back at Edge cashing in Money In The Bank on Undertaker last year.

It’s time for the Cutting Edge, with the World Title above the ring, with a ladder set up. Edge is a little more serious than usual here and talks about his feud with the Undertaker over the last year. It all ends on Sunday because it has to, and Undertaker will be gone from WWE. And FOR REAL this time, not just a few months.

It comes down to experience in the match, and we see a video of the two of them in TLC matches. In other words, a blank screen for Undertaker’s half and a bunch for Edge (with an Indiana Jones theme for some reason). Edge finally brings out Undertaker, who makes his rather slow way to the ring and doesn’t seem overly happy. Edge knows that Undertaker isn’t comfortable about all these things, so here is La Familia with a casket to make him feel better.

Undertaker slugs Edge down and the fight is on, with Undertaker fighting through the numbers game. That just lets Edge chair Undertaker in the back, as well as the head, to put him down. More chair shots let them put Undertaker in the casket, leaving Edge to (slowly) climb the ladder. Before he can grab the belt though, the gong strikes and the lights go out. Undertaker is on top of the ladder and house is quickly cleaned. Hawkins is Last Rided through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was mainly about Edge vs. Undertaker, which went better than I expected given that they’ve been feuding for months now. Other than that you didn’t get much of a build for Sunday, though there were a few decent enough matches. The Edge vs. Undertaker stuff was good enough, but this was a skippable show as you would be better off just going straight to the pay per view.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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