Smackdown
Date: December 21, 2007
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We have a new World Champion around here as Edge defeated Batista and Undertaker in a triple threat match at Armageddon. That is going to be a big change of pace as we head into the new year but now Edge needs a new challenger for the Royal Rumble. I doubt we find out who that is tonight but maybe there is something else out there. Let’s get to it.

Here is Armageddon if you need a recap.

Teddy Long wheels Vickie Guerrero to the ring and we look at Edge winning the World Title at the pay per view. Back in the arena, Vickie introduces Edge, who is officially presented with the title by Teddy. Edge isn’t sure who he should thank first before starting with Teddy. Then he thanks the fans, the Edgeheads, but there are two in particular, so here are the Major Brothers (who weren’t identified on Sunday).

They just went by the Major Brothers to get noticed, and now we get to meet the real people: Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder. With that out of the way, Edge thanks the real star here by kneeling next to Vickie. Edge declares her the love of his life (again) and we get a music video of the two of them together in a park, at dinner, under a gazebo and more.

Back in the arena, Edge needs to talk about Batista, who doesn’t need to carry the show anymore. Tonight, after Batista loses his rematch, the last image you will be seeing is Edge holding up the title. This was the big celebration, but Edge now having Ryder and Hawkins makes him a bit more dangerous.

Great Khali/Runjin Singh vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Singh is in a copy of Khali’s gear and mocks his pose for one of the few out of the ordinary things he has ever done in WWE. Finlay’s right hand to Khali doesn’t do much to start as Khali throws him into the corner. A big boot puts Khali down as JBL wants to know what isn’t big on Khali. Singh comes in, or at least gets tagged, as Hornswoggle pulls his pants down on the apron.

Everything breaks down and Khali is knocked down on the floor, leaving Finlay to throw water at Singh (as Hornswoggle hides under an umbrella). Back in and a giant swing sets up the Tadpole Splash to finish Singh. Not enough shown to rate, but this was comedy and nothing more.

Dancing ensues post match.

Here is Ric Flair for a chat. Flair wishes us a Merry Christmas, because it might be the last chance he gets to in a WWE ring. He got to see everyone here today and he respects all of them. Anyone who knows him knows that he has been in the ring for 35 years and he has only want to be the best. Now Vince McMahon has decided that the next time Flair loses a match, he has to retire.

In ten days, he has to face the greatest wrestler alive today, HHH. That’s who Flair has said he wanted to face in his final match, just for some irony. Five years ago, he came back here and wasn’t in a good place, but HHH told him to go be himself. Therefore, Flair knows that HHH is going to bring the best he can. Flair loves HHH as a brother, but if he loses, he’ll have no regrets. This was serious Flair and he made the match feel a lot bigger.

Maryse, in a bit of a Mrs. Claus outfit, welcomes us back and wants us to keep her warm.

Rey Mysterio/CM Punk/Kane vs. Big Daddy V/Mark Henry/MVP

Kane and Henry start things off with Henry taking him into the corner for the heavy right hands. That’s reversed so Kane can get the better of things but Punk comes in and gets knocked away without much effort. MVP runs Punk over but gets caught with the running knee in the corner. A rollup gives Punk two and it’s a six man standoff as we take a break. Back with Rey coming in to kick MVP in the head and snap off an anklescissors. It’s quickly off to Punk vs. Big Daddy V, the latter of whom plants Punk without much trouble.

A gorilla press slam makes it even worse and MVP comes in to work on an armbar. Henry gets in some choking but it’s right back to MVP, who gets enziguried down. The hot tag brings in Kane to clean house, including the side slam to drop MVP. The top rope clothesline sets up a moonsault from Rey Mysterio but Henry breaks up the 619. Everything breaks down and Punk knees Henry in the corner, setting up the 619. A chokeslam and the springboard splash are enough to finish Henry.

Rating: B-. This got some time and built up rather well until the hot ending saw the good guys slay a monster. The time is a big factor here as there were multiple stories going on at once and you need the extra few minutes to make that work. They pulled it off here and I had a nice time with the match as a result. Well done and a near hidden gem.

We look at Edge winning the World Title again.

We see Jamie Noble and Michelle McCool on their date at a restaurant, which looks quite a bit like the backstage room at any given WWE TV show. Noble seems to be in a little over his head with the menu and shocked at the prices, but he wants Michelle to meet his granny. Then he tries to order a bunch of French food (fries, onion soup etc) because it’s a French restaurant.

The waiter can’t do that so Noble goes on a bit of a crazed rant (Jean Claude Van-Damme is mentioned) before he is told this is actually an Italian restaurant. Later, after dinner, Noble gives her a gift: Old Spice cologne so she can smell him when he’s gone. Noble talks about hunting and fishing, plus enjoying magic. He tries to pull the tablecloth out and….yeah. Noble: “Check please!”

Festus vs. Deuce

And they’re both Santa Claus. The bell rings and Festus pulls on his beard before unloading in the corner. Deuce (Santa Deuce actually) gets in a knee to the ribs and starts clubbering before taking out the knee. Festus is sent outside and then brought back inside for a chinlock, which of course triggers the comeback (as chinlocks are known to do). Some uppercuts set up a splash and, after Jesse takes out an interfering Deuce, a fireman’s carry into a flapjack is enough to give Festus the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here and the Christmas deal was pretty tacked on. This match didn’t do much for me other than show how weak the tag division is at the moment, as you have Miz and John Morrison running roughshod over the division and Cody Rhodes and Hardcore Holly as champions on the other show. How good can the divisions really be with that kind of depth?

And now, an address from JBL (he has a podium). This is going to be his final appearance on Smackdown because he is getting back in the ring to deal with Chris Jericho. It will be a bigger comeback than anyone has ever seen and we see a clip of JBL costing Jericho the Raw World Title at Armageddon. All Jericho had to do was apologize for bumping into JBL but instead Jericho treated him as an afterthought. JBL isn’t coming back to be in the opening match in Poughkeepsie because he is going to prove that he is the only wrestling god.

Maryse is hanging Christmas ornaments and wishes us Happy Holidays.

Tazz takes JBL’s place on commentary.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Batista

Batista is challenging…but hang on because Vickie Guerrero has a better idea.

Smackdown World Title: Edge/Edgeheads vs. Batista

Batista is still challenging. Curt Hawkins starts things off for the team and gets pummeled in the corner. An Edge distraction lets Hawkins get in a cheap shot so Ryder can come in. Edge has to break up the Batista Bomb and we take a break. Back with Edge stomping on Batista and dropping an elbow to make it worse. Batista fights up but misses a charge into the post.

That doesn’t seem to mind as he runs Edge over and does the same to the Edgeheads without much trouble. The spinebuster is enough to pin Ryder for the title and yeah I wouldn’t buy it either. Vickie says not so fast as Batista has to pin Edge (points for a false finish) so he pulls Edge back in for a top rope shoulder. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but Hawkins brings in the chair for the DQ.

Rating: C. They kept this fast paced and gave us the (not exactly convincing) fake out but you can only get so much out of Batista beating up Edge’s new goons. Giving Edge lackeys is a good thing though and they should serve him well in the future. For a debut as a team it went well, but this felt like a house show main event rather than something big.

Post match Edge hits a Conchairto and wishes us a Merry Christmas to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Much like the rest of the TV from this week, it was pretty clear that they weren’t going to put in the biggest effort between a pay per view and the holiday break. Throw in the Royal Rumble being about a month away and there was little reason to do much on this show. The six man was good, but the rest of the show was little more than a filler week.

 

 

 

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Summerslam 2022
Date: July 30, 2022
Location: Nissan Stadium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s time for one of the biggest shows of the year and that means we are in another stadium. The show is going to be interesting for a few reasons, including the fact that it is the first Summerslam ever not under Vince McMahon’s watch. That means we might be seeing something new this time around so let’s get to it.

The opening video features a country song about Nashville and how it’s a crazy town. The rest of the video looks at the major matches, with Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar not getting that much of a focus above the rest.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging. They go to the mat to start with Belair running her over, only to have Lynch snap the arm to take over. Back up and Belair backflips away, setting up a release Glam Slam. A standing moonsault gives Belair two but Belair’s arm is banged up. They head outside where a KOD drops Lynch onto the barricade but she holds the arm and slams Belair into the barricade as well.

A legdrop to the back of the neck makes it worse and they head inside with Belair in trouble. Belair gets sent into the corner for a kick to the back before getting taken down into a weird armbar. With that broken up, Lynch dropkicks her to the apron but another middle rope legdrop is countered into a powerbomb (that’s a new one). Belair knocks her outside for another Glam Slam onto the apron and a suplex on the floor drops Lynch again.

Back in and Belair’s arm gives out on a slam attempt, allowing Lynch to bust out Diamond Dust for two. Lynch goes to the hair but Belair pulls her up into an old Big Show Alley Oop of all things. The KOD is countered into a failed Disarm-Her attempt so they roll outside with the KOD connecting on the floor. Back in and another KOD is blocked so Belair hits a spinebuster. Lynch is back up to pull her off the top though and it’s the Manhandle Slam for two. This time it’s Lynch going up but a Spanish Fly brings her back down. The KOD retains the title at 15:03.

Rating: B. The problem here is that it’s a rematch from one of the better things WWE has done in a very long time. There was nowhere near the same level of urgency or anything close to it and that is because the feud ran out of steam. It’s still a good match and these two feel like some of the bigger stars in the division, but you’re only going to get so far with a match we saw done bigger and better less than four months ago.

Post match respect is shown….and then Bayley is back. Bayley walks down the aisle….and then Dakota Kai does as well. And so does Io Shirai. The trio gets in the ring and stares down Belair, but Lynch gets back up and a staredown sends Bayley and company leaving, with Bayley putting her arms around them. Well there’s your big start.

We recap Logan Paul vs. The Miz. They teamed together at Wrestlemania and won, but then Miz attacked him. Paul has since signed and now he wants revenge.

Logan Paul vs. Miz

Ciampa and Maryse are here with Miz, who gets a chant about the size of his anatomy. Miz has has a Polaroid around his neck of him attacking Paul in a nice touch. Paul gets taken down but is ready for the basement boot to the face. Instead, Miz kicks him down a bit more slowly and mocks Paul, who doesn’t look pleased. Paul takes him down and teases a YES Kick before shifting to the boxing.

Back up and Miz pulls him off the middle rope and hits a Codebreaker. After a cheap shot from Ciampa and a chinlock that doesn’t last long, Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner and Paul has an opening. A Blockbuster and powerslam give Paul two each and he fires off some YES Kicks. The Figure Four rubs it in to Miz a bit more but he makes the rope. Ciampa gets in another cheap shot and is ejected, only to have him sit down in a chair.

Cue AJ Styles to jump Ciampa, leaving Paul to hit a not so Phenomenal Forearm for two. With nothing else working, Paul takes him outside and loads up the announcers’ table for a heck of a frog splash (that got some serious distance). Maryse offers a distraction so there’s no count, Miz loads up the Polaroid but has to pause before hitting Maryse. Paul grabs a Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 14:13.

Rating: C+. All things considered, this was pretty good, with that frog splash being a major highlight that is going to be shown for a long time to come. Paul has a good look and the athleticism to back it up, meaning he could have a future in this business. Miz was put there because he was going to guarantee a safe match that he could keep together and he pulled that off well here. Not a great match, but for a celebrity in his second match, Paul looked rather good.

The Maximum Male Models shill Pure Life Water.

US Title: Theory vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending after taking the title from Theory at Money In The Bank. Theory jumps him from behind with the Money In The Bank briefcase before the bell but Lashley says ring the bell. Some forearms to the back keep Lashley in trouble but he’s right back with a big spinebuster. That’s enough for Theory and he tries to leave, only to have Lashley cut him off. Lashley swats away a toss of the briefcase and takes things back inside, where the spear hits the post by mistake. He’s fine enough to load up a gorilla press and then drops Theory into the Hurt Lock to retain at 4:38.

Rating: C-. This was near dominance for Lashley, who shrugged off everything Theory threw at him and then won in the end. The briefcase shots can only get you so far and the rest of the match was pretty much downhill for Theory. I’m still not sure why they needed to do this match again, but Theory continues to fall apart after being thrown into a ladder match for his lone big win in a rather long time.

Judgment Day vs. Mysterios

No DQ and Rhea Ripley is here with Judgment Day. They start fast with Dominik hitting a big suicide dive on Balor, leaving Rey to Lionsault Priest. An armdrag out of the corner rocks Balor again but he’s back with some choking on the ropes to slow Dominik down. Priest and Balor start taking turns on Dominik until he gets in a shot of his own, allowing Rey to come in and pick up the pace.

Balor throws in a chair but Rey takes it away and starts swinging, at least until Priest drops him with a superkick. Rey fights back and tries the 619 but Balor makes the save, only to get caught on top. The double 619 is loaded up but Rhea Ripley pulls Dominik outside and drops him on the apron. Priest gives Rey the South of Heaven chokeslam but here is the returning Edge to spear Balor. Edge helps set up a 619 into the springboard splash to give Rey the pin on Balor at 11:05.

Rating: C. I wasn’t interested in the match before it was announced and I wasn’t interested in how it went. These teams have fought each other time after time now and there is little reason to get interested in them again. The Edge return was a nice moment, but it would have been better to have him appear on Raw rather than here to avoid doing the tag match again. Oh and thank goodness Balor took another fall, just in case you hadn’t gotten the point yet.

We recap Pat McAfee vs. Happy Corbin. McAfee is happy to be on commentary and laughed at Corbin for losing. Corbin jumped him and wants revenge, so it’s time to have a match on the big stage. There is a personal connection here too, as they were roommates when they played in the NFL.

Happy Corbin vs. Pat McAfee

McAfee has a choir interrupt Corbin’s entrance by singing BUM A** CORBIN for an interesting way to go. Corbin talks trash to start and gets superkicked, setting up a hurricanrana out of the corner. A clothesline puts Corbin on the floor so McAfee puts him on top but gets shoved into his moonsault. That’s fine with Corbin who dropkicks him into the corner so the beating can begin.

Some forearms and right hands send McAfee outside where Corbin whips him into the barricade. Back in and Deep Six gives Corbin two so he tries the slide under the bottom rope (Cole: “Shades of the Boss Man at Summerslam 1991.”) but gets kicked in the face. McAfee hits a dive but gets sent onto the announcers’ table, with Corbin talking trash to Michael Cole.

Back in and Corbin goes up, with McAfee charging the corner and superplexing him back down for two. A missed charge sends Corbin into the post and outside, leaving McAfee to go up top. After almost falling, McAfee flip dives onto Corbin (Cole: “The Swan-Tone Bambini!” Graves: “THE WHAT?????”) and they head back inside. The referee gets bumped so McAfee kicks him low (with Cole pointing out that it was payback for last night when Corbin did the same), setting up a middle rope Code Red (and not a great one, as it might have been a botched Canadian Destroyer) for the pin at 10:35.

Rating: C. Yeah they missed a bit here, as McAfee wasn’t quite on par with his previous performances. They had some very near botches (that slip before the flip dive could have been terrible) but they pulled it together well enough. Much like Miz, Corbin is the kind of guy who is there to walk McAfee through the match, even if Corbin in control isn’t the most fun. McAfee was off tonight, but remember that this is his fourth or so career match. It’s going to happen at some point.

We look at Drew McIntyre beating Sheamus to become the new #1 contender.

Here is McIntyre to talk about being ready to challenge Roman Reigns or Brock Lesnar at Clash At The Castle. McIntyre: “Let’s talk about Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER! Uh…..in Nashville! In a last man standing match! In front of…..what’s your name?” Fan: “Colt!” McIntyre: “IN FRONT OF COLT, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER!” Anyway, he’s ready to win and gets some fireworks.

We recap the Usos vs. the Street Profits. The Usos won at Money In The Bank but Montez Ford’s shoulder was up. That and some other screwy decisions meant that a guest referee was needed so….Jeff Jarrett was brought in. Sure.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Street Profits

The Profits are challenging and come to the ring with the Tennessee Titans cheerleaders. Dawkins and Jimmy start things off with Jey coming in rather quickly. The top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two and Jey grabs a chinlock to keep him down. The Umaga attack in the corner connects and the Usos get to do the NUMBER ONE thing. Another Umaga attack misses though and Dawkins’ enziguri allows the tag to Ford so house can be cleaned.

A running Blockbuster gets two on Jey with Jimmy making the save. Jey is back with a pop up neckbreaker on Ford but he’s back up to send the Usos outside. Dawkins hits the big running flip dive onto both of them, setting up the lifting swinging neckbreaker for two on Jimmy. Everything breaks down and some superkicks set up the Superfly Plash to Dawkins for two.

Ford comes in but gets dropped again, allowing the Usos hit hit the stereo Superfly Splashes on Dawkins. That’s broken up as well and everyone is down for a breather. Dawkins is back up with a spinebuster into Ford’s frog splash for two, meaning Ford stops to yell at Jarrett. Ford hands it back to Dawkins but loads up a dive to the Usos, who kick him in the knee to cut him off. Double superkicks on the floor and in the ring drop Dawkins, setting up the 1D to retain the titles at 13:21. Jarrett was barely a factor here.

Rating: C+. What in the world was the point of that? They built up the Profits as the kingslayers and then they just lose like they have before, with the guest referee meaning nothing? I’m not sure where this is supposed to go, as the Profits have nothing left to do and the only team worth going after the Usos is the Viking Raiders. The Usos are beyond stale as champions and much like Reigns, they’re out of challengers, so what are we supposed to do now?

Riddle runs through the crowd and wants Seth Rollins out here for a fight right now. Security tries to get rid of Riddle but here is Rollins anyway. Cue Rollins so the fight is on, with Rollins hitting another Stomp to leave Riddle laying.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match with Liv Morgan defending against Ronda Rousey. Morgan won Money in the Bank and cashed in on the same night on a banged up Rousey. Tonight, Morgan needs to prove she can do this.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Liv Morgan vs. Ronda Rousey

Morgan is defending and gets kicked down to start. The ankle lock is broken up and Morgan is back with a Codebreaker. Oblivion is broken up and Rousey goes for the armbar, which is reversed into the Rings of Saturn. A crucifix bomb gives Morgan two but Rousey gets another armbar in the ropes.

Back in and the armbar goes on again but this time Morgan makes the rope. Another armbar sends Morgan rolling to the ropes again and we pause for the doctor to look at Morgan’s arm. Morgan insists that she can go but Rousey pulls her into a cross armbreaker. That’s stacked up for a pin on Rousey at 4:35….with Morgan tapping at the same time. Morgan retains, even though the tap came first as shown on replay.

Rating: C-. I had a bad feeling they would pull something like this, as Morgan won but only after getting wrecked by Rousey for a few minutes. As usual, WWE is hesitant to add someone to the main event scene and it makes for some lousy moments like this one. Either let Liv get the big win or give it back to Rousey, but enough of this “well we’ll see” stuff. Rousey looked good and will probably get a rematch, but my goodness the halfhearted push is annoying.

Post match Rousey goes after the arm again and beats up the referee for a bonus as we seem to have a heel turn.

Kane is here to announce the attendance of 48,449. I understand he has some questions about that count.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. They’ve fought a lot before and now they’re doing it again, this time in a Last Man Standing match, which is billed as their final match. Theory is also lurking around with the Money In The Bank briefcase.

WWE Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Reigns is defending in a Last Man Standing match…..and Lesnar rides to the ring in a tractor. Lesnar cuts off Paul Heyman’s entrance and does his own, while standing in the….whatever you call the part of a tractor that holds stuff. Lesnar dives out of the tractor to start and Reigns is knocked outside, setting up a big overhead belly to belly. They fight over to the lighting structure and knock each other into it, with Lesnar getting the better of things again.

A German suplex sends Reigns flying again so it’s table time. Heyman begs enough for a distraction, allowing Reigns to Samoan drop Lesnar through the table. Reigns puts him through another table and takes it back inside for a pair of Superman Punches. The spear keeps Lesnar down for a bit but a second attempt is countered into a failed F5 attempt. Reigns gets sent outside in a heap so Lesnar goes to the tractor.

With that going nowhere, he hits Reigns in the head with a piece of the table for about six. Lesnar throws Reigns into the bucket of the tractor, raises him up, and then drops him down into the ring. With that not working, Lesnar rolls some German suplexes and hits an F5 for nine. Another F5 is countered into a guillotine, which Lesnar reverses into one of his own. Reigns is mostly out but dives back to the ropes to break the count at nine.

Lesnar gets back in the tractor….and starts ramming the ring. Then he lifts the ring up to send Reigns sprawling out onto the floor but here are the Usos for the save. Lesnar dispatches them so Heyman tries to call it off, only to get F5’ed through the announcers’ table (they’ve been teasing that for a LONG time). Reigns is back up with a spear and they’re both down…so here is Theory to cash in.

A briefcase shot drops Reigns but Lesnar F5’s Theory onto the briefcase. The Usos are back up with a double superkick for nine, followed by a spear for nine more. Reigns unloads with the briefcase for nine more, followed by a belt shot, but Lesnar gets up again. A shot with the other belt knocks Lesnar down and the Bloodline piles a bunch of stuff onto him before standing on top of it to retain at 22:44.

Rating: B-. This is going to be the really divisive match of the night and that isn’t a surprise. They did a lot of stuff and the match was a total spectacle, but they lost me at the end with Reigns knocking him down for nine over and over. It’s a good example of a match that needed to be trimmed down by a few minutes to hammer the point home better. At the same time, I’m sure the fans on the other side of the ring loved looking up at the video screen, because those front row tickets are pretty worthless when the ring is halfway on its side for the last seven minutes of the match.

The other problem here is simple: who in the world is supposed to be able to stop Reigns? Drew McIntyre is the next big challenger, but is that their solution? McIntyre has already had his time and while you can’t really gauge things from the pandemic, I don’t know how much of a success it was. Reigns has cleared out the company by this point, and they are going to need something special to get the title off of him, whenever they finally do it.

Reigns and the Bloodline celebrate for a long time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was kind of all over the place, with a good first half, a pretty lame second half, and a main event that will probably have a lot of people mad. The best part was the overall feeling though, as it did feel more loose, with commentary sounding like humans instead of buzzword machines. The show didn’t go too long and was over in less than four hours, but it didn’t have anything great and not much really happened. Not an awful show, but if this was supposed to be the big relaunch, they’re only a little bit of the way there (and that was mainly after the first match).

Results
Bianca Belair b. Becky Lynch – KOD
Logan Paul b. Miz – Skull Crushing Finale
Bobby Lashley b. Theory – Hurt Lock
Mysterios b. Judgment Day – Springboard splash to Balor
Pat McAfee b. Happy Corbin – Code Red
Usos b. Street Profits – 1D to Dawkins
Liv Morgan b. Ronda Rousey – Rollup

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 25, 2022
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We’re officially in an all new era as Vince McMahon is completely gone and HHH is now in charge of creative. That may sound very interesting on paper but I would give it another week before you see any major changes. There might be some surprises here and there this week though as it’s the go home show for Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with Miz and Logan Paul mid-brawl in the ring with referees having to break it up. There’s your fresh way of starting the show.

With that out of the way, here is the Bloodline for a chat. Roman Reigns gets to the point by having the Garden acknowledge him before handing it off to Paul Heyman. After the mic goes out (Heyman: “We have a sound guy that must be from New Jersey or something. We want your name written down. You’re the next one out the door.”), we hear about everything Brock Lesnar has done over the years.

Lesnar has ruined a lot of things over the years, including the Streak, but he won’t do that on Saturday when Roman Reigns nears 700 days as Universal Champion. Reigns is tired of hearing about Lesnar every time you mention his name so it is time to send Lesnar back to Canada to slaughter a bunch of hogs. Heyman explains the concept of Last Man Standing, which is how Reigns is finally going to get rid of Lesnar once and for all.

Now cue Theory with the briefcase, but Reigns says that if you’re going to come out here, get in the ring and acknowledge the Tribal Chief. Theory stares Reigns down, but Reigns says that Theory’s daddy isn’t here to protect him anymore. Fans: “WHO’S YOUR DADDY?” Reigns says it’s going to be him if Theory doesn’t mind himself. The Bloodline goes to leave but Jimmy Uso taps Theory on the neck. A briefcase shot to the back…actually doesn’t get any reaction from Jimmy, as the Bloodline leaves in peace.

Post break Theory is still in the ring but Drew McIntyre cuts him off.

Theory vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre starts fast and hammers away with the power but gets caught with a jawbreaker. Theory gets to stomp away in the corner until McIntyre blasts him with a clothesline. Futureshock connects but Theory rolls outside before the Claymore can launch. That’s cool with McIntyre, who drops him chest first across the announcers’ table as we take a break.

Back with Theory sending him outside and then whipping him hard into the steps. Back in and McIntyre reverses a suplex into one of his own before winning the slugout. The Claymore is loaded up again but here are the Brawling Brutes to jump McIntyre for the DQ at 9:37.

Rating: C. I liked this one well enough as you had Theory in there with a fresh opponent but he also didn’t use the briefcase for the DQ. It was nice to not go with the obvious ending that Theory has been using as they actually mixed it up a bit. Now just let Theory win a match and we might be getting somewhere.

Post match the beatdown is on until Bobby Lashley makes the save. Theory has to bail before he gets wrecked as well.

Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre vs. Theory/Sheamus

Joined in progress with Lashley beating on theory before handing it off to McIntyre. A cheap shot from behind puts McIntyre down though and it’s Sheamus coming in to choke away in the corner. The Irish Curse plants McIntyre and Sheamus hammers away but he won’t tag Theory back in.

That’s enough for McIntyre to get in the Glasgow Kiss and bring Lashley back in. Sheamus gets suplexed and knocked outside, where Lashley’s spear to Theory is cut off by Sheamus’ knee. Butch gets in the ring for a distraction so Ridge Holland can go after McIntyre. That’s fine with McIntyre, who suplexes Butch onto Holland, earning the Brutes an ejection and we take a break.

Back with Lashley fighting out of a chinlock but getting knocked down again so Sheamus can come back in. Lashley spinebusters his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in McIntyre to clean house. A Sky High gets two on Theory but McIntyre gets low bridged to the floor, leaving Lashley to hit the big spinebuster on Theory. Sheamus breaks up the cover with a top rope knee so McIntyre takes him outside. The fight is on until Sheamus hits the White Noise on the floor. Theory is back up but cue Dolph Ziggler for a distraction so Lashley can grab the Hurt Lock for the tap at 12:20.

Rating: B-. This got some more time and advanced Lashley vs. Theory a bit more. Sheamus vs. McIntyre is already set for Friday so they got a little extra time of their own here. It might not have been the best match but it was an effective bit of storytelling and there is always room for that.

Post match Theory goes up the ramp but gets superkicked by the Usos. Roman Reigns comes back out to hand Theory his briefcase.

We look back at 20 years of Rey Mysterio in WWE.

Rey arrived with his wife and kids earlier tonight.

Dolph Ziggler says he wants Theory to back up his potential. AJ Styles comes in to say he likes that idea but here is the Alpha Academy to interrupt. A tag match is set up.

Here is Rey Mysterio, with Dominik, for the 20th anniversary celebration. Rey talks about having his first match in Mexico at 14 years old and now here he is. Rey can’t believe he made it here after making all kinds of legendary rivalries. As a smaller guy and a proud Latino, he became World Champion at Wrestlemania XXII and made a lot of friends along the way.

Rey thanks Dean Malenko, Konnan, Batista, Kurt Angle and Edge, but then there is Eddie Guerrero. He thanks Eddie for always watching over him and feels truly humble for all of the support he has received for the last twenty years. Rey also thanks his family (watching backstage along with some friends) and Dominik in particular but finally he needs to thank the fans. We get some thank you’s in Spanish but here is Judgment Day through the crowd for their scheduled match.

Mysterios vs. Judgment Day

Joined in progress (a theme tonight) with Dominik taking over on Balor before sending him into the corner for right hands from Rey. We get the Eddie dance in the corner as Rey hammers away, only to get sent face first into the buckle. Priest comes in for the hard whip into the corner and the toss suplex gets one.

It’s back to Balor for the chinlock but Rey pops u for a quick escape. Dominik comes back in to clean house, including a dropkick to put Balor on the floor. Priest cuts off Dominik’s dove and sends him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Dominik hitting a reverse Sling Blade and bringing Rey back in for a kick to Priest’s head.

A top rope seated sent on gets two on Priest, who boots Rey down for two of his own. It’s back to Balor, who has to avoid the 619 and hit the Coup de Grace for two as Dominik saves. With nothing else working, Balor tries the Eddie Guerrero chair trick but Rey does the same thing right back. A double 619 sets up the frog splash to finish Balor at 11:29.

Rating: C+. This feud really needs to wrap up already because it has already run out of steam. Granted that might be due to Judgment Day being treated as a bunch of losers for so long now but I’m sure they’ll stretch it out again. It was nice to see Rey get a win on his big night, though the evening is young and ripe for something happening later.

We look at Cody Rhodes winning the ESPY Award for WWE Moment of the Year.

The Mysterios join their family and friends backstage with drinks being poured. Rey also gets what looks like his gear from Halloween Havoc 1997. Rhea Ripley comes in and pie faces Rey’s daughter, meaning it’s Judgment Day coming in to beat Rey down (Balor: “It’s not your anniversary. It’s my birthday!”), including Priest powerbombing him onto a table.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat, but first we see how her match with Becky Lynch at Summerslam. Cue Becky but Belair cuts her off with the EST names. Becky decks her and the brawl is on with referees having to break it up. Short and to the point here.

Alexa Bliss is ready for Doudrop tonight and then is coming for the title.

Rey Mysterio is pretty banged up but Dominik has to chase off Judgment Day. The distraction lets Rhea kick Rey in his bad arm.

Doudrop vs. Alexa Bliss

Nikki Ash is here with Doudrop and her distraction lets Doudrop hit a running crossbody for an early two. The chinlock goes on to keep Bliss in trouble but she fights up and kicks away. A running basement dropkick gives Bliss two but she has to avoid a charge in the corner. Doudrop is favoring her shoulder so the referee checks on her, allowing Ash to shove Bliss off the top. Not that it matters as Bliss grabs a tornado DDT for the pin at 4:19.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as Bliss’ offense was a bit hard to buy against a monster like Doudrop. That being said, Doudrop hasn’t meant anything in a long time so the result wasn’t a surprise. At least Bliss seems to have something in mind now and her getting back into the title picture wouldn’t be the biggest stretch.

Post match Bliss signs a fan’s sign for a nice moment.

AJ Styles tells Logan Paul that he doesn’t know much about him, but if Paul doesn’t like Miz, AJ must like him.

It’s time for the debut of Logan Paul’s Impaulsive TV and he gets straight to the point by calling Miz out. An insult to the size of Miz’s testicular fortitude, here is Maryse to answer instead. Maryse can’t pronounce genitalia but she does have some statistics about average size. Paul: “Who measures their testicles?” Cue Miz to say he does, as does every single man in this arena. Miz yells about how he gave Paul everything and now Paul is ruining it. Paul says Maryse has a bigger set than Miz and the brawl is on, with Ciampa running in to help beat Paul down. The Skull Crushing Finale drops Paul.

The Street Profits and the Usos have a staredown with Jeff Jarrett in the middle. Trash is talked but Jarrett says he wants peace kept tonight, because he’ll remember it on Saturday.

AJ Styles/Dolph Ziggler vs. Alpha Academy

Before the match, Chad Gable praises himself and mocks Styles and Ziggler as a thrown together team. Like the New York Knicks! AJ starts fast with the drop down into the dropkick to send Gable outside. There’s the big slingshot dive and we take a break. Back with Otis running over AJ, who manages to slip over for the tag to Ziggler. That’s fine with Otis, who drops Ziggler with a hard elbow to the face. Gable comes in and misses the moonsault, allowing Ziggler to hit the superkick. Everything breaks down and AJ knocks Gable into a Zig Zag for the pin at 7:26.

Rating: C. Pretty much just a “there” match with Styles and Ziggler having nothing in common and now getting a tag match for whatever reason. They did need to get Ziggler something to do until Theory is freed up so maybe this is the best that they have. Then again, the Alpha Academy doesn’t mean anything anymore after so many losses so this was some decent filler and little more.

Summerslam rundown.

Bloodline vs. Riddle/Street Profits

Dawkins takes Jimmy down to start and hands it off to Ford. Jimmy pulls Ford into the corner for some choking from Jey and Reigns but Ford is fine enough to grab the arm. Riddle comes in for the rapid fire kicks and the Usos are sent outside, with Ford hitting the big flip dive.

We take a break and come back with Riddle getting stomped in the wrong corner, including some from Reigns himself. Reigns cranks on the arm and hands it back to Jimmy, who misses a splash in the corner. That’s enough for the tag to Ford, who starts the house cleaning with some kicks to the head. Reigns comes in off a blind tag though and a release Rock Bottom plants Ford hard for two. Ford got busted open somewhere in there and the Usos make it worse with something like a top rope Demolition Decapitator.

We take another break and come back with Ford managing to knock Reigns down. Riddle gets the tag to clean house and everything breaks down in a hurry. That includes a bunch of moves with the word Bro, including the springboard Floating Bro to the floor. Reigns tags himself back in and drops Riddle for two, with Ford making the save. Jimmy hits a big dive onto Ford on the floor but Dawkins takes him out. Riddle hits the hanging DDT on Reigns but the RKO is shoved off, allowing Reigns to hit the spear for the pin at 19:25.

Rating: B. This was the hard hitting and long main event tag match that is going to work more often than not. Riddle taking the fall is a bit sad to see, but it is a fall against Reigns and the Profits have a title match at Summerslam so it could have been a worse pick. Good, long match here though and sometimes that’s what you need.

Post match here is Seth Rollings to give Riddle a Stomp onto the steps to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show wasn’t a masterpiece by any means, but it was WAY better than the last few terrible weeks. There was a bit more energy to the show and while we didn’t get anything significantly different, I’ll take some slight changes over what we were getting and hope for more after Summerslam. Other than that, the sad part of this show is how Madison Square Garden feels like any other arena. There was little here that made the Garden feel special and that is sad for the World’s Most Famous Arena. Overall though, this was a breath of fresh air and I’ll take that any week.

Results
Drew McIntyre b. Theory via DQ when the Brawling Brutes interfered
Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre b. Theory/Sheamus – Hurt Lock to Theory
Mysterios b. Judgment Day – Frog splash to Balor
Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop – Tornado DDT
AJ Styles/Dolph Ziggler b. Alpha Academy – Zig Zag to Gable
Bloodline b. Riddle/Street Profits – Spear to Riddle

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: June 6, 2022
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are done with Hell In A Cell and that means we are done with Cody Rhodes for the time being. Rhodes defeated Seth Rollins in the main event last night but did so with a torn pectoral muscle. We won’t be seeing him for a long time, so now the question is what happens on the road to Money In The Bank. I’m sure that song will ensue. Let’s get to it.

Here is Hell In A Cell if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last night’s Cell match, featuring Cody somehow not losing an arm.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Here is Cody Rhodes for a chat. After welcoming us to the show, Cody talks about how it is a privilege to do what he does. Cody talks about his daughter and how he wants her to know that in the darkest part of his career, he stood and fought. He did it against one of the best ever in Seth Rollins (Cody: “Yeah I don’t like him either.”) and now the book is closed.

With that out of the way, he wants to talk about what’s above him, which would be the Money in the Bank briefcase. It has eluded him throughout his career, but if he were to retrieve the briefcase and win it, he would be the WWE Undisputed Universal Champion (that needs a new name).

Cue a limping Seth Rollins to interrupt and say that while he doesn’t like Cody, after last night, he respects him. Rollins says Dusty is proud of his baby boy right now and they shake (left) hands. Rollins whispers something we can’t hear and limps away, leaving Cody looking a bit taken aback. Cody gets the long walk up the ramp….and Rollins hits him in the back of the head with a sledgehammer. A stomp on the peck and some pokes with the hammer later, Rollins leaves him alone. There’s Rollins getting his heat back after last night.

Post break, Cody pulls himself up and refuses the stretcher.

Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

The bell rings and here are the 24/7 goons, with Brooke winning the title. Becky grabs the mic and says this isn’t happening, so right now she’s challenging for the 24/7 Title, with promises of violence against anyone who interferes. Call this a no contest at about 1:00.

24/7 Title: Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Brooke is defending and gets Bexploded to start. Cue Asuka for a distraction though and the rollup…actually only gets two. Becky blasts Brooke with a clothesline but Brooke is back with the handspring elbow. The Swanton misses though and Becky kicks her in the face. The Manhandle Slam is countered though and Asuka grabs Becky’s leg so Brooke can retain the title at 2:13.

John Cena is coming back on June 27.

It’s time for MizTV, featuring the return of Maryse. Miz hypes her up and talks about how great she is before talking about the premiere of the new season of MizTV. Cue Riddle, tonight’s guest, to interrupt and stumble through some French. Maryse speaks some better French and Riddle says gesundheit. Riddle says hi to Randy Orton and hopes he is back soon…unlike his stepdad. With that out of the way, Miz says Orton’s career is over and he isn’t coming back.

That’s too far for Riddle, who is tired of fighting Roman Reigns’ minions every week. He wants Reigns himself and he’s going to take the title from him. Riddle finds it funny that John Cena is playing Peacemaker while Miz is playing homemaker, while Maryse leads him around by the testicles. This sets off a discussion of the size of Miz’s testicles, with Riddle saying prove it. Miz looks disturbed so Riddle asks for a match right now. Miz, in a tuxedo, says no but here is Ciampa to jump Riddle from behind. Sure, Miz is down for the match.

Miz vs. Riddle

Joined in progress with Riddle in trouble but he makes a pretty quick comeback. Riddle gets sent outside where he pulls off Miz’s pants, leaving Maryse to send in the (seemingly) loaded purse. That’s cut off with an RKO to give Riddle the pin at 2:13.

We look at NXT In Your House, which was a pretty good show.

Street Profits vs. Usos

Non-title Championship Contenders match. Dawkins rolls Jimmy up a few times for some early near falls before hitting the jumping elbow for two more. A double flapjack gives Ford his own two and the Usos need a breather. The Usos need a breather on the floor before Jey comes in, only to get taken down by Dawkins as well. Back in and Jey gets knocked off the top for a crash and we take a break.

We take a break and come back with Dawkins in trouble, including the running hip attack in the corner. Dawkins is sent outside for a whip into the steps and we take a rather fast second break. Back again with Jey running Ford over for two but Ford sends him outside. That means the parade of dives, including Dawkins hitting the big running flip dive. Back in and the spinebuster into the frog splash gives Ford two, with Jimmy making a last second save. They fight to the floor and it’s Ford diving back in to beat the count for the win at 16:28.

Rating: C+. The two breaks in the middle didn’t help things but at least a regular team is getting a title match at some point. I’ll take that over the next thrown together team, as you can only do so much with them. The Profits are one of the better teams around today so go with someone who might be a threat to the titles.

We look back at Seth Rollins attacking Cody Rhodes earlier today.

Here is Bobby Lashley for a chat. He talks about the history he has with MVP but even MVP and Omos couldn’t take him out. So what is next for Lashley? Cue Theory of all people to interrupt, because he doesn’t like being interrupted. Lashley doesn’t like this and is ready to fight but Theory wants to show off his bicep. Lashley is fine with that and shows Theory a bigger one. The challenge is on for the US Title shot but Theory doesn’t think Lashley has earned it. Theory says Lashley has never beaten him so Lashley kicks him to the floor.

Veer Mahaan vs. Dominik Mysterio

Rey Mysterio is at ringside. Dominik starts fast and gets Veer a bit frustrated with the chasing. A dropkick through the ropes staggers Veer and a kick to the face makes it worse. Back in and Veer blasts him with a jumping clothesline before knocking Dominik outside. Dominik gets thrown into Rey, with Veer kicking Rey in the mask to make it worse.

We take a break and come back with Dominik fighting out of a neck crank and starting the comeback. A missed charge in the corner lets Dominik hit a 619 to send Veer’s head into the post. The frog splash connects for two, but Veer is back up with the Million Dollar Arm. The Cervical Clutch is loaded up but Rey comes in for the DQ at 9:14.

Rating: C-. Can we just wrap this story up already? It started all the way back in April and now it just keeps going. If WWE wants to do something with Mahaan, then have him crush the Mysterios for good so they can move on to anything else. Mahaan is only so interesting in the first place and dragging this out over and over isn’t helping him.

Here is Judgment Day to announce their newest member. Damian Priest says ALL RISE and Rhea Ripley talks about how they love power. Edge is proud of the two of them and announces the newest member of the team: Finn Balor. Edge is rather pleased and asks how this happened. Balor talks about how there was clarity last week, because joining Judgment Day was a calling. Now he can finally see clearly and after last night’s loss, Balor reached out to talk about how things have been going.

Balor didn’t realize how similar they were, with Priest saying that they are ready to shake off the last issues with Judgment Day….which is Edge. Priest decks Edge and the other three lay him out, with Balor adding the Coup de Grace. A Razor’s Edge toss sends Edge through the announcers’ table but we’re not done yet. The Crossface with the chair bar has Edge in more trouble and there’s the Conchairto to knock Edge out again.

Omos vs. Cedric Alexander

Chokebomb finishes Cedric in 7 seconds.

Post match Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode return but MVP isn’t happy with them stealing Omos’ spotlight. Ziggler superkicks MVP but the two of them run off from Omos.

Otis vs. Ezekiel

Chad Gable is here with Otis, who powers Ezekiel into the corner to start. There’s the t-bone suplex to send Ezekiel down, setting up the neck crank. Ezekiel fights up and strikes away, including a jumping knee into an enziguri to finish Otis at 2:19.

Post match Ezekiel grabs the mic and talks about how Kevin Owens disrespected him. Next week, he wants a rematch so here is Owens to agree, with one condition: Ezekiel has to admit that he is Elias. Ezekiel admits that his name is Elias, which has Owens very happy. The rematch is on, but Ezekiel says that he was lying. A jumping knee leaves Owens laying.

We look at Bianca Belair retaining the Raw Women’s Title last night.

Alexa Bliss vs. Doudrop vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Liv Morgan

The winner gets Bianca Belair, at ringside, at Money in the Bank. Morgan and Bliss are knocked outside to start, leaving us with Ripley and Doudrop slugging it out. Ripley gets the better of things but Morgan and Bliss pull Doudrop out to the floor. Morgan and Bliss get back in to double team Ripley, who isn’t having any of that. Morgan is sent outside, leaving Ripley to stomp away. The delayed suplex is broken up by Morgan but Doudrop runs everyone over and we take a break.

Back with Doudrop beating on Bliss and hitting a clothesline for two. Morgan and Ripley pop back in with Morgan hammering away in the corner, setting up the middle rope hurricanrana. Doudrop is back up with a sitout powerbomb for two on Monday with Bliss making the save.

They all go to the corner and it’s a Tower Of Doom to bring everyone back down in a crash. Bliss and Morgan are up first for the exchange of rollups for two each. Twisted Bliss hits knees though, leaving Morgan to load up the Oblivion to Doudrop. Nikki Ash makes the save though, leaving Doudrop to Michinoku Driver Liv. Ripley makes a save of her own and it’s Riptide to Doudrop for the pin at 14:18.

Rating: C+. I don’t think there was any serious question about the winner here as Ripley is in the big stable and the team needs something to make them look more important. You don’t have her lose a match so soon to take away their momentum so this was the right way to go. Doudrop isn’t doing anything anyway so they went with the right option, with Morgan and Bliss being spared from taking an unnecessary fall.

Belair and Ripley stare each other down and the rest of Judgment Day come in to join Ripley to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. You know, I really didn’t dislike this show and a lot of that was due to it feeling like things were happening. They had some fresh stories, or at least some fresh matches, which is more than I can say about the last few weeks. It was far from a great show and I have no confidence that it is going to continue, but we didn’t get a bunch of Money in the Bank stuff and they had a surprise with the Judgment Day thing, so I’ll call this a success.

Results
Dana Brooke vs. Becky Lynch went to a no contest
Dana Brooke b. Becky Lynch – Rollup with Asuka holding the leg
Riddle b. Miz – RKO
Street Profits b. Usos via countout
Veer Mahaan b. Dominik Mysterio via DQ when Rey Mysterio interfered
Omos b. Cedric Alexander – Chokebomb
Ezekiel b. Otis – Crucifix
Rhea Ripley b. Liv Morgan, Alexa Bliss and Doudrop – Riptide to Doudrop

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Barretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Primo and J. are sent out in the first thirty seconds but the ring is still really full. Henry puts out the Dudebusters and Chavo, only to get dumped by Khali. As you might expect, a bunch of people get together to put Khali out as well. Cryme Tyme gets together to put out Gallows but Shad eliminates JTG. Things settle down for a change but there are still too many people in there.

Rating: D+. This would be the traditional not great battle royal but it was cool to see someone young getting a win for a change. You could see a lot of new names showing up around the company, though a lot of them really never went anywhere. Unfortunately that would include Tatsu, who never went much higher than this, partially due to ECW not being around to take away some of the roster spots.

We open with another fly over.

Fantasia (from American Idol) sings America the Beautiful.

Tag Team Titles: R-Truth/John Morrison vs. The Miz/Big Show

Video on Wrestlemania week in Phoenix.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Extreme Rules ad.

Sheamus vs. HHH

Two straight Irish Curse backbreakers put HHH down as the match slows a lot. An ax handle gets two and some simple right hands to the face get the same. We hit the chinlock because this is the point in a WWE style match where you would put on a chinlock. After a powerslam, Sheamus grabs an armbar. Dude come on. HHH fights up out of the devastating armbar (because nothing else had been done to his arm) and grabs a DDT.

The high knee and facebuster get two but Sheamus counters the Pedigree into the Brogue Kick for two (of course HHH gets to be one of if not the first person to kick out of it). After the spinebuster sends Sheamus to the apron, another Brogue Kick drops HHH. No cover though as HHH pops up and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 12:10.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk holds him down with a test of strength grip until Rey fights up and springboards to the top for a moonsault into a DDT (that looked way better than I was expecting). Another moonsault is caught in the GTS (Go To Sleep) but Rey grabs the rope to save himself. Rey kicks him down and tries a frog splash but Punk sits up just in time. Back up and Serena saves Punk from a 619, only to have it connect a few seconds later, setting up the springboard splash for the pin at 6:30.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Bret punches it out of his hand though and beats on him for a bit, followed by stomping away at the “lower abdomen”. Someone throws Bret a chair so he can have a seat for a bit. Bret beats on him with the chair for a good while and Vince appears to be in shock. The Sharpshooter finally makes Vince tap at 11:09.

Rating: A. This was all it needed to be and exactly what people were expecting. Neither guy is a wrestler anymore so having the Hart Family, especially Kidd and Hart-Smith, helped a good bit. There was never any doubt as to what this was going to be and while it went a bit longer than it needed to, it did everything it needed to.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Atlanta. Cole promises a great guest host.

The attendance is 72,219, again not announced as a record.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Maryse/Michelle McCool/Alicia Fox/Layla/Vickie Guerrero vs. Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix/Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Rating: D. Well at least it was quick. The Divas were in a weird place here as they were trying to find a new top name but everyone was kind of getting lost in the shuffle. Laycool (Layla and Michelle) were trying but they needed some top stars. Kelly eventually became the main star, even though she was just a model who could only kind of work a match. Anyway, this was a nothing match that was only there for the Vickie stuff, which was another problem around this time.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista gets into his gloating power offense but Cena grabs a quick suplex to get a breather. An early AA attempt is countered into a DDT for two and now Batista gets his real advantage. We hit the chinlock with a body scissors (Striker: “Look at this potential submission hold!” Just stop. Please.) but Cena fights up and wins a slugout, only to get caught in a neckbreaker. Now we get the real Cena comeback with all his usual stuff, including the STF which sends Batista crawling to the ropes. A quick spear gets two for the champ and both guys are down.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ and no countout. Shawn just walks down but Undertaker makes his big entrance by rising up through the stage. Shawn breaks up the staredown with a throat slit of his own so Undertaker pounds on him in the corner early. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up Old School but Undertaker might have tweaked his knee. Shawn goes right after the knee to break up a chokeslam and starts in on the arm for some reason. Striker: “Shawn Michaels is very adept at submission grappling.” For the love of all things good and holy will someone SHUT HIM UP???

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo:

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

2013 Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/04/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvi-goodbye-mr-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 7, 2022
Location: Ball Arena, Denver, Colorado
Commentators: Jim Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We have less than two weeks to go before Elimination Chamber and a lot of the big matches are set. Since this is Raw, we have two Elimination Chamber matches set up, plus Becky Lynch vs. Lita, as Smackdown doesn’t seem all that important this month. Tonight is a special show since we are on SyFy due to the Winter Olympics, so we have NO COMMERCIALS in the first hour. I’m thrilled too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open big with the final round of the Academic Challenge between RKBro and the Alpha Academy. This time around, it’s a Quiz Bowl competition and after looking at the spelling bee/scooter race being split, we’re ready to go. Chad Gable explains the rules: it’s one point per question and if you get it wrong, the other team gets to steal. One point per answer, first to give points wins.

Alpha Academy gets the history question (who was the first President with a college degree) right but Riddle evens it up in biology (how many hearts does an octopus have). They trade Greek Mythology (who flew too close to the sun) and Cartoons (which Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle used nunchucks) and it’s tied at two. Otis knows that Texas is the biggest of the 48 continental states but Riddle doesn’t know whose father-in-law Justin Bieber is. Randy guesses Alec Baldwin (of the four Baldwin choices) and gets it wrong, only for Gable to steal the point (with Stephen Baldwin) and goes up 4-2.

Film And Literature doesn’t go so well as Gable thinks Romeo and Juliet has been made into more films than Hamlet. Riddle knows it though and it’s 4-3. Orton picks Sports and gets a question about the Denver Broncos, which the fans help him get right. With the score tied at 4-4, Gable insults the fans and gets the final category of Metric Conversions. Gable doesn’t know how many grams are in an ounce, but Orton gets it right for the win. Gable goes into a huge rant and keeps getting buzzed. Cue the Street Profits to say Alpha Academy owes RKBro a title shot, but Gable wants a match right now.

Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

Non-title. Ford strikes away at Gable to start and everything breaks down early on. Gable kicks Ford out to the apron for a breather and it’s Otis coming in to slow it down a bit. The big splash crushes Ford and it’s off to the neck crank to make it worse. A running splash in the corner connects but Ford avoids a second to send Otis into the post.

The double tag brings in Dawkins to slug away at Gable. Dawkins hits a running splash in the corner and grabs a t-bone suplex for a bonus. Otis has to make a save so Ford hits a big running flip dive to take him down on the floor. That leaves Gable to pull Dawkins into the ankle lock and the counter gives Gable the pin at 5:37.

Rating: C+. Both teams looked good here and the counter into the clean pin was a nice way to go. Gable and Otis get some extra momentum on the way to whenever they have to defend their titles against RKBro. Good for a fast TV match though and I’ll take what I can get from something like that on Raw.

Video on Lita.

MVP brings out Bobby Lashley, complete with his own Paul Heyman style intro. Hometown boy Lashley gets the kind of reception that you would expect and MVP talks about how Lashley took the title from Brock Lesnar. Then Lesnar won the Royal Rumble and has earned another shot at Wrestlemania. Well done, but now he wants in the Elimination Chamber as well, which is pure fantasy.

Lesnar is in the match but taking the title from Lashley is pure fantasy. Lashley says THE CHAMP LIVES HERE before talking about how Lesnar disrespected him. Last week Lesnar came to the show and said he wanted to get into the chamber. What Lesnar doesn’t realize is that he’ll be locked inside with Lashley. After the Elimination Chamber, Lashley is going to Wrestlemania with his title. Pretty simple and to the point promo here.

We look at Alexa Bliss getting her (replica) Lily doll last week.

This week, Bliss seems to love the doll but hands it over to the therapist, leaving her in tears.

Damian Priest vs. AJ Styles

Non-title. Styles ducks some shots in the corner and chops away before getting dropped with a jumping elbow to the jaw. Priest is sent outside for a slingshot forearm but comes right back with a running clothesline inside. Styles slips out of a superplex and has to escape the Reckoning.

The Styles Clash is broken up as well so Styles hits a fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. A kick to the head staggers Styles though and a bulldog driver gets two. Another exchange of strikes to the head goes to Styles…but Priest falls on top of him for two anyway. That was a bit odd but Priest is fine enough to break up the Phenomenal Forearm. AJ is right back with the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: B-. For those of you keeping track, that is Priest’s third straight singles loss and fifth out of six singles matches. I would really like to believe that WWE isn’t cooling off on him but that seems to be the situation at the moment. Other than that, we had a good match here with Styles getting a win before he moves on to a bigger match. I’m sure the only way to build him up was a win over the United States Champion too.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Seth Rollins mocks Kevin Owens for not making it into the Elimination Chamber but Owens thinks he might be lying. That’s a negative from Rollins, who laughs a lot.

It’s time for MizTV with Maryse here with Miz. They waste no time in bringing out the Mysterios as this week’s guests (with Miz and Maryse dancing during the entrance). Miz mocks Dominik for losing last week and puts his hand up to silence the crowd. Of course Miz didn’t cheat to win last week, unlike Edge and Beth Phoenix at the Royal Rumble.

Miz talks about how he used the Money in the Bank contract to become WWE Champion last year but the fans still think he is a cheater. Somehow though, Rey Mysterio is on the cover of WWE2K22 instead of the Miz. What does Rey have that Miz or Maryse doesn’t? Maryse thinks she was great at the Rumble and thinks Rey should call himself Rey Marysesterio. Dominik gets in Miz’s face and the rematch is on. Miz likes the guts, and thinks Dominik is Eddie Guerrero’s son.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz

Dominik starts fast by taking Miz down but Maryse breaks up the 619. That’s enough for an ejection, but Miz kicks Dominik in the face anyway. The referee gets rid of Maryse so Rey trips Miz, allowing Dominik to grab the pin at 1:40.

Post match Dominik does the Eddie Guerrero dance to celebrate.

Nikki Ash vs. Bianca Belair

Belair, whose hair is a bit more down this week, runs her over to start and does her dance. The delay lets Nikki tie Belair’s leg up in the ropes and put on a half crab. That’s broke up and Belair hits a fall away slam into some slams, albeit with some limping. Some rolling suplexes get two on Nikki but she’s back with a tornado DDT; Belair catches her with a kick in the corner though and it’s the KOD to finish Nikki at 3:57.

Rating: C. The selling was pretty good, though maybe Belair stopping to dance while selling the leg wasn’t the best look. Belair is great at the athleticism but she goes with that dance WAY too much. Other than that, Nikki’s crash continues, but at least she got in some offense here. She is just going to be cannon fodder in the chamber, but this could have been more of a squash.

The 24/7 chase continues, with Dana Brooke saying Reggie is such a sweet guy. She kisses him on the cheek, but says they’re really good friends. They hug, with Reggie teasing a regular kiss before the 24/7 goons chase them off.

Kevin Owens vs. Austin Theory

Theory goes intense to start and stomps him down in the corner, followed by a hard whip into another corner. Back up and Owens sends him into the corner, setting up a trip to the floor. A flip dive off the steps crushes Theory and we take a break. Back with Owens hitting a Cannonball to send Theory outside.

The frog splash off the apron crushes Theory for two back inside but they trade finisher escapes. Owens’ spinning superplex is broken up so he settles for a super Regal Roll. The Swanton only hits raised knees but Owens blocks a rolling something with a superkick. Owens Stuns him for the pin at 9:00.

Rating: C+. They were packing in a good bit of action here, which is partially due to Owens dropping some weight in recent months. He has been moving better as a result and the matches have improved as well. Theory losing again is likely to make Vince McMahon angry, which could make for another step forward. Given McMahon’s interactions, it would seem that Theory has a perfectly fine future and that’s nice to see.

Randy Orton gives Riddle a pep talk/advice for the Elimination Chamber but tells him to focus on Seth Rollins tonight. Riddle is grateful and even invites Orton to a celebratory toga party next week. Orton seems ready to shake his head.

Veer Mahaan is still coming.

Here is Lita for a chat. She was fired up to get to be in the Royal Rumble with some of the biggest stars today. Then she showed up on Raw to challenge Becky Lynch, because she has been wanting that match for a long time. Cue Lynch to say how much that means to her. She has wanted to be Lita for so long but now that she is the champ, there is need for Lita.

Lynch is the star around here and now Lita shows up around the most important time of the year asking for a title shot? Lita talks about how she was some punk rock kid who chased her dreams. The people made her a four time Women’s Champion, but Lynch says Lita can keep the people. The fight is on with Becky getting the better of things but making the mistake of going back. That means a Twist of Fate into the Litasault to leave Becky laying. Lita still isn’t a great talker, but they both got the point across here.

Kevin Owens comes up to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about taking Austin Theory’s place in the Elimination Chamber. That isn’t happening, because last week’s qualifying matches were final. Owens wants to go to Wrestlemania as WWE Champion and talks about how much Texas means to him. He basically begs but nothing is said.

Liv Morgan vs. Doudrop

Doudrop goes with the power to start so Morgan tries the eternally bad idea of trying a choke. Morgan gets driven into the corner though and we take a break. Back with Doudrop hitting the backsplash but Morgan manages to fight up. A series of strikes rock Doudrop and the springboard spinning Codebreaker gets two. Morgan’s hurricanrana is countered into an electric chair faceplant for a near fall, followed by the Vader Bomb to crush Morgan for the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C-. Call it a hunch, but the fact that Morgan is clearly on the downside of her big push made it clear that she was losing here. The fact that Doudrop has already lost her title shot doesn’t matter. Morgan’s time near the title is over and that is kind of a shame, as the fans seemed ready to go with her, but that doesn’t seem to be happening anytime soon.

We look at Alexa Bliss’ therapy earlier.

And now, more of Bliss’ therapy. She has been trying to control her anger but might have beaten up a woman (who looked like Lily) at the grocery store. The therapist thinks they have more work to do.

Seth Rollins has done everything but headline Wrestlemania as WWE Champion so he’ll have to win the title in the Elimination Chamber.

Seth Rollins vs. Riddle

Rollins throws him down to start but Riddle grabs an early armbar. With that broken up, Rollins takes it outside for a buckle bomb against the barricade and we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with an Alberto top rope double stomp instead. Riddle blocks a clothesline with a kick to the head though and the forearms in the corner rock Rollins again. Riddle sends him outside for the apron kick to the chest and a springboard Floating Bro. Cue Kevin Owens to jump Riddle for the DQ at 7:49.

Rating: C. This was starting to get going before the ending, which was a good way to protect both of them. I’m not sure how much sense it makes to have either of the people in a World Title match so this could have been a lot worse. That being said, I think you can guess what is coming in the rest of the show.

Post match the beatdown is on until Randy Orton runs in for the save and let’s do that tag match thing.

RKBro vs. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins

Joined in progress with Orton working on Rollins and taking him outside for a drop onto the announcers’ table. Back in and it’s off to Riddle but Owens comes in off a blind tag and takes over. The backsplash gets two on Riddle and Owens mocks Orton a bit for a bonus. Rollins adds a top rope ax handle and an elbow to the jaw cuts off the comeback bid.

A double stomp gives Owens two and there’s a heck of a chop in the corner. Rollins misses the big frog splash and Riddle’s jumping knee drops Owens. There’s the hot tag to Orton to start cleaning house but Rollins blocks the RKO. It’s back to Riddle, who gets caught with a rolling elbow to the face. Another one to the back of the head sets up the Stomp for the pin at 8:05.

Rating: C+. There are your #1 contenders, who managed to get a title shot and then lose a match in the span of about two and a half hours. I know the Tag Team Titles don’t mean anything but could they at least pretend like they matter? Rollins getting a win means more and his story is more important, though you would think they might have a better idea on how to do this.

Post match Orton hits Owens with an RKO to blow off some steam and end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The word “bleh” comes to mind with this one, as it felt like a bunch of filling in time before we get to the important stuff next Saturday. That makes for a really dull three hours, with the extra fifteen minutes without commercials in the first hour making it worse. There was good action here, but it was more 50/50 booking and people not getting much of anywhere. I want to see how Elimination Chamber goes but they aren’t making the build to it all that thrilling.

Results
Alpha Academy b. Street Profits – Rollup to Dawkins
AJ Styles b. Damian Priest – Phenomenal Forearm
Dominik Mysterio b. Miz – Rollup
Bianca Belair b. Nikki Ash – KOD
Kevin Owens b. Austin Theory – Stunner
Doudrop b. Liv Morgan -Vader Bomb
Riddle b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered
Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens b. RKBro – Stomp to Riddle

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Royal Rumble 2022
Date: January 29, 2022
Location: The Dome At America’s Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 44,390
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We are officially kicking off the Road to WrestleMania XXXVIII and that means things should be starting big here. First up we have the Royal Rumbles themselves, plus what should be a pair of awesome World Title matches as Brock Lesnar defends against Bobby Lashley and Seth Rollins challenges Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.

Note that I was in the stadium for this, sitting in the upper deck with the Titantron on my right.

No Kickoff Show matches this year, which was a bit weird.

The opening video looks at the start of the Road To Wrestlemania, with a look at just about everything on tonight’s card. Cool, even if it isn’t breaking new ground.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is challenging and comes out to the Shield theme, including in the Shield gear. He even flips over the apron as McAfee talks about how these two plus Mox ran roughshod on the wrestling world. This plays into the feud so well and it makes things that much more personal. Rollins starts sticking and moving early on and ducks a clothesline in the corner. The Sling Blade drops Reigns and Rollins hits back to back dives on the floor.

Back in and the springboard knee to the face is uppercutted out of the air to give Reigns a breather. There’s the apron boot to the face but Rollins catches the dive off the steps. A powerbomb puts Reigns through the announcers’ table and a frog splash gets two. The Phoenix splash misses but Rollins is right back with the Buckle Bomb. The Stomp gets two and Rollins can’t believe the kickout, allowing Reigns to comeback with a clothesline.

There’s a powerbomb for two on Rollins, who starts to laugh. Said laughter earns him some heavy shots to the head but he pulls Rollins into a triangle choke. Reigns doesn’t care for that and powerbombs his way to freedom before sending Rollins shoulder first into the post. They head outside with Reigns sending him into various objects. Back in and the Superman Punch gives Reigns two so Rollins rolls outside for a needed breather.

That’s fine with Reigns, who hits a spear, only to have another countered into a Pedigree back inside (how Rollins beat Reigns at Money in the Bank 2016) for two. Rollins takes too long with the BURN IT DOWN stomps and gets caught with another spear. Before Reigns can cover though, Rollins keeps laughing and holds out the Shield fist. Instead of falling for it, Reigns grabs a guillotine but Rollins makes the rope (with the referee picking it up and dropping it onto the rope). Reigns doesn’t let go though and that’s a DQ at 14:35.

Rating: B-. This was starting to roll at the end and then they went with the ending designed to set up a rematch rather than give us a winner. This is a match you could run back a few times based on their history alone but instead we get the screwy way out. They seem to be going with some weird Batman vs. Joker story, albeit with Rollins as a heroic Joker, and that is oddly intriguing. Unfortunately that isn’t enough to make up for a bad ending though and it brought things down.

Post match Reigns grabs a chair and destroys Rollins, ala how Rollins turned on him to break up the Shield years ago. That’s some good…symbolism I believe?

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and Sasha banks is in at #1 (second time in five years and in Sailor Moon inspired gear.) and Melina is in at #2. The splits entrants gets a big ovation and they pose at each other to start. That’s enough for Banks, who dumps her out and poses again. Tamina is in at #3 and you can feel the silence. Banks jumps her on the floor to start but can’t get her over so soon. Some running knees in the corner rock Tamina instead and it’s Kelly Kelly in at #4. Kelly and Banks team up on Tamina but Kelly tries Figure Four necklock over the ropes.

That means an easy elimination to get rid of Kelly and it’s Aliyah taking her place at #5. Some teased eliminations don’t go anywhere and it’s Liv Morgan in at #6. The modified Backstabber has Banks in trouble and it’s Liv cleaning house, as the camera cuts go INSANE, to the point where I can’t even see everyone in the ring.

Queen Zelina is in at #7 as Tamina puts Banks on the apron. Tamina gets the elimination and the fans are not pleased, mainly because that leaves Liv Morgan as the biggest name in the match. Bianca Belair is in at #8 and the fans seem rather pleased as she goes after Tamina. Zelina gets suplexed and splashed but Tamina saves the elimination due to reasons of not thinking things through.

Dana Brooke, with Reggie, is in at #9 and gets to clean house but Tamina and Zelina double team her down. Michelle McCool is in at #10, giving us Tamina, Aliyah, Morgan, Zelina, Belair, Brooke and McCool. House is cleaned, including McCool’s Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) to Zelina. Brooke gets tossed by McCool and it’s Sonya Deville in at #11. Well not quite in as she joins commentary instead of heading inside. Sonya explains that the jacket staying on means she isn’t competing yet, because that is somehow literally the rule now.

Natalya is in at #12 as we continue the brawling on the ropes. Tamina is tossed but Belair saves herself as Cameron (to Somebody Call My Mama) in at #13. A reminder of Cameron’s history with Naomi is enough to get Sonya inside to eliminate Cameron. Oh no. Whatever would we do without Cameron? Naomi is in at #14 and the fight is on, with Naomi hitting the springboard kick to the face. Sonya is out in a hurry and it’s Carmella in at #15. Hold on though as she needs to put on her mask, meaning everyone else can brawl on the ropes (again).

Rhea Ripley is in at #16 and that should mean some eliminations. Instead of getting in immediately, she throws Carmella inside so she can toss Vega and Carmella at the same time. Ripley cleans house until Charlotte is in at #17 (this can’t be good for Rhea). Natalya gets triple teamed as Charlotte tosses Aliyah. Naomi is sent over the top but lands on her hands….so Sonya pops up to pull her out.

It’s Ivory in at #18 (that woman does not age) and she has a mic, saying that nothing has changed. She sees a lot of wayward, lost little girls, but she wants to see….and then Ripley picks her up. Ivory doesn’t stop talking (about Facebook followers) as Ripley puts her on the apron and then knocks her out. Funny gag and better than anything else in the match so far.

Brie Bella is in at #19 and the place goes coconuts. Graves: “One half of the Bella Reality Empire.” Natalya has to save herself from Brie, who has to kick her way to freedom as well. Mickie James, the Impact Women’s (yes Women’s) Champion is in at #20 and the camera cuts makes it a little difficult to see the title. That gives us Morgan, Belair, McCool, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Brie Bella and James. Some kicks rock a few people and Mickie gets to nip up.

Mickie hurricanranas Michelle out and it’s Alicia Fox (thankfully with the dark hair instead of the blonde) in at #21. Brawling ensues and it’s Nikki Ash in at #22. Ripley waits at the ropes but Nikki comes through the crowd (because she knew that A, Rhea would be in at this point and B, knew that she would be looking at the entrance) to jump Rhea from behind. That’s not enough for an elimination though and Ripley gets to chop Charlotte. Summer Rae (with the CRAZY catchy Call To Me theme) is in at #23, hits a few kicks and then gets tossed by Natalya.

Nikki Bella is in at #24 (to a bit of a weaker reaction than Brie received) and gets to to clean house, including getting rid of Fox. Sarah Logan, in a kind of caveman style look, is in at #25. The Bellas get jumped and we get a quick Riott Squad reunion, only to have the Bellas toss both of them (and do the L on the head taunt because it’s 1992). Lita is in at #26 to give us a big dose of star power and gets to clean house. Mickie gets tossed over the top and a hanging DDT gives Lita the elimination.

We get the Lita vs. Charlotte showdown until Mighty Molly is in at #27. Nikki jumps her in the aisle though and throws Molly inside, where the cape is ripped off. That’s enough for Nikki to toss Molly out….and Ronda Rousey returns at #28 (for some reason, commentary gave Sarah Logan a MUCH stronger shocked reaction). Rousey gets rid of Ash and tries to knock out Nikki, only to have Brie knock Nikki out instead.

Brie gets beaten up in the corner and it’s Shotzi in at #29. Rousey dumps Brie and moves on to Ripley (that could be interesting) but switches to Belair. Shayna Baszler (perhaps with new music) is in at #30, giving us a final grouping of Belair, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Lita, Rousey, Shotzi and Baszler. Rousey smiles at the sight of Baszler, who suplexes Lita and kicks Natalya.

We get the Rousey vs. Baszler showdown but Charlotte breaks that up. Rousey dumps Shotzi and Belair gets rid of Natalya…who gets back in, only to be dumped by Rousey as well. Ok then. The Twist of Fate hits Charlotte and there’s the middle rope hurricanrana to Ripley. The moonsault is loaded up but Charlotte kicks Lita out instead. Ripley has to get out of a triangle choke over the ropes by shoving Rousey into the post….and Charlotte kicks Rhea out (BECAUSE OF COURSE CHARLOTTE BEATS RIPLEY AGAIN!).

That gets us down to four with Charlotte getting kicked down. Belair flips out of Baszler’s Kirifuda Clutch but the threat of the KOD is broken up, allowing Charlotte to dump Belair and Baszler at the same time. That leaves us with Rousey vs. Charlotte and the big staredown is on. Charlotte charges with a running boot and gets tossed to give Rousey the win at 59:38 (the one on one stuff wasn’t even a minute long).

Rating: C-. And that is almost all because the last few minutes picked up. This was a perfect illustration of how shallow the women’s division is because WWE focuses on the same people over and over again. Counting everyone up, you had FIFTEEN WOMEN who were making some sort of return here, including several who weren’t exactly huge stars that I was wanting to see back in the first place.

For instance, Cameron was here. As in the Cameron who is best known for that time when she didn’t know how a cover worked. She was nothing more than a joke back in the day and now she gets a Rumble spot for the sake of advancing Naomi vs. Sonya? Was anyone wanting to see Sarah Logan and Summer Rae return for their combined minute and a half? Or Ivory and Molly Holly getting in their 45 seconds total? Of those fifteen returning legends/surprises, seven of them didn’t even last 75 seconds. If that’s the best you can do with them, what’s the point?

That leaves you with fifteen active names (including one of the Women’s Champions) and egads some of them were rough. There is no depth in the women’s division right now and I wouldn’t want to watch most of these women again, at least based on how they were presented here.

As has been the case for WAY too long in the women’s division, WWE cares about its top stars (save for Sasha Banks, who was a total nothing afterthought here for some reason) and no one else. Charlotte, Rousey and arguably Belair were presented as important here. Who else in the division gets treated like a big deal? Becky Lynch and…..is there anyone else? The talent is absolutely there and available, but if WWE is going to have a handful of people at the top, there is no need to have this match. At the very, very least, find a better lineup of people to come back as surprises, because this was really tough to watch.

A lot of sign pointing and pyro (remember that, because it becomes important later) ensue.

Titus O’Neil, who might be the greatest person in WWE history, did a bunch of charity work this week.

Raw Women’s Title: Doudrop vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is defending and the idea is that Doudrop is a different kind of challenger. Doudrop powers her into the corner to start and a shoulder takes Lynch down again. The threat of the basement crossbody sends Lynch bailing outside for a breather, only to have Doudrop nail a headbutt back inside. A backsplash hits Becky’s spine but the Cannonball only hits stairs, allowing Becky to stomp away.

The chinlock doesn’t last long so Becky switches to a sleeper….as the fans are chanting about a fire. Yeah remember that pyro during Rousey’s celebration? Well it wound up causing the Wrestlemania sign to CATCH ON FIRE, with pieces of melted plastic falling down. The fans in the section were evacuated and the sign was lowered, because WWE has somehow managed to start a small fire from how much they put into pyro (though they couldn’t TURN DOWN THE SPOTLIGHTS that were shining into the fans’ eyes all night long, making most of the show half viewable).

Anyway, Doudrop powers out of a sleeper but misses a charge into the post. Becky’s missile dropkick gets one and she starts shouting about being straight fire. Doudrop runs her over and hits the full backsplash, only to have Becky come back with the Disarm-Her. That’s switched into a cross armbreaker but Doudrop powerbombs her way to freedom.

Now the Cannonball can connect in the corner but the Vader Bomb hits raised knees. Lynch busts out a Molly Go Round of all things for two so she hammers away at the head. Doudrop scores with some headbutts but gets draped over the top for Becky’s top rope Fameasser. Something like a Big Ending gives Doudrop two but the Vader Bomb is countered into a super Manhandle Slam to retain the title at 13:18.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match where there was no drama and it felt like we were sitting around waiting on the inevitable finish. Lynch isn’t going to lose to Doudrop, either now or with WrestleMania so soon. Doudrop was the victim of the month for Lynch and that is where things started to fall apart. The match wasn’t a bad one and Doudrop did her monster stuff well, but this was a bunch of sitting around waiting for Becky to beat her.

Tonight’s attendance: 44,390. It’s not a record or anything, but at least we stopped the show so WWE can pat itself on the back. Again.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. Brock Lesnar, featuring the forged in fire video from a few weeks ago. This is great stuff, as it shows how similar their paths were on their way to this showdown. The video made me want to see the two of them fight and it warmed me up again here.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley

Lesnar, with Paul Heyman, is defending while Lashley has MVP to even things out. They fight over a lockup to start and neither can shove the other away. Lesnar snaps off a German suplex and smiles but Lashley is right back up. Lashley hits a BIG German suplex of his own, sending Brock into the corner for some nodding and a big eyed “OK!”.

Back to back German suplexes rock Lashley but he’s right back on his feet again. Some right hands rock Lesnar and a pair of spears send Lesnar outside. Another spear only hits the barricade though, sending Lashley into the timekeeper’s area and allowing Lesnar to point at his intelligent head. Back in and Lashley misses a charge into the corner so Lesnar hits another German suplex. Lesnar does it a few more times and even keeps his own count.

The F5 is countered though and Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock out of nowhere. Lesnar can’t power out but he can drive Lashley into the corner, crushing the referee in the process. Lashley goes for it again but this time Lesnar reverses into the F5. There’s no count though…and here is Roman Reigns to spear Lesnar in half. Reigns stares down at Heyman, who hands over the WWE Title. A big belt shot knocks Lesnar silly and another referee comes out to count the pin, giving Lashley the title back at 10:17.

Rating: B-. I liked this one more the first time, as the rewatch just showed you how much of it was spent on German suplexes. That’s Lesnar’s favorite way to go and it doesn’t often make for the most exciting matches. There were good parts to this and Lashley looked like he had a real chance, but ultimately this was about Lesnar vs. Reigns and that’s where the main event scene is becoming a big problem. Lashley just won the WWE Title and is a total afterthought, which should never be the case.

Heyman leaves with Reigns in case it wasn’t clear.

We look at Ronda Rousey returning and winning the women’s Royal Rumble.

We recap Miz/Maryse vs. Edge/Beth Phoenix. They are two of the most powerful married wrestling couples and Edge already beat Miz earlier this month. Then Maryse went a bit nuts by hitting Phoenix in the head with a brick, meaning it’s time for the big mixed tag. Yeah it isn’t the most thrilling story but it’s the logical way to go.

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

The double entrances are quite good, including Edge and Beth high fiving each other as they pass on the stage. Beth chases Maryse outside to start and Miz has to make a save, accidentally pulling Maryse outside. Back in and the guys come in to slug it out, only to have Maryse offer a distraction so Miz can take over. The YES Kicks rock Edge but he counters the big one into a rollup. Maryse gets in a slap, sending Beth outside to chase her off with a chair. Edge gets in a quick shot, allowing Beth to start stomping the steps to fire him up.

The tag brings in Beth for a spinning side slam to rock Maryse again. Miz comes in for the save and gets in a staredown with Beth, who is driven into the corner for the right hands to the head. That is completely realistic in this case and the spot works as a result. Maryse makes a save with the loaded purse though and it’s time to stomp away. The signature pose sets up Maryse’s reverse chinlock but Beth powers up for a double clothesline. That’s enough for Edge to start stomping like Beth did earlier in a nice touch.

The hot tag brings in Edge to clean house, including an Edge-O-Matic and a top rope elbow (that’s a new one for him) but Edge misses a spear into the corner. Maryse hits a top rope hurricanrana (not exactly a signature for her and Lita’s was cooler, but that was a big one from Maryse) and the Skull Crushing Finale gets two. Beth is back in and it’s a double spear to Miz, setting up the stereo Glam Slams for the double pin at 12:30.

Rating: C. This felt like a big Raw main event and nowhere near a match that belonged in the same feud Edge and Miz started. Edge vs. Miz was fine, but Maryse couldn’t be presented as a real threat to Beth. That doesn’t make it much better when Miz is barely seen as a threat to Edge, making this a match that felt like it had another pretty clear ending from the get go. It was fun live, but watching it back just made it feel like Edge and Beth were doing some weird couples workout.

Video on Sasha Banks, which might be a better choice if she hadn’t been an afterthought in the Royal Rumble. This is one of those Peacock filler videos.

As the Banks video was airing in the arena, Edge and Beth Phoenix went over to their daughters in the front row and took them up to the stage, where one of them did Edge’s pose with him. It was one of the better parts all night and very sweet.

We get a video on a Medal of Honor winner, who was injured in Afghanistan and saved several lives. Four soldiers were killed that day though and now he wears a bracelet on his wrist in their memory.

The soldier, Captain Flo Groberg, is here, as part of a partnership between the Medal of Honor foundation and WWE. Cool.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and the Wrestlemania sign is back up. AJ Styles is in at #1 and Shinsuke Nakamura is in at #2, meaning the star power is out in force to get things going. Nakamura strikes away to start but Styles is back with the sliding forearm. Austin Theory is in at #3 and this could get interesting. Theory breaks up the fight and tries to toss Nakamura but has to punch Styles instead.

Robert Roode is in at #4 and takes Nakamura down with a spinebuster, setting up a showdown with Styles. McAfee refers to this as a massive impact and AJ forearms Roode out for the first elimination. Nakamura runs Theory over as Ridge Holland is in at #5. Styles tosses Nakamura and the clock picks up quite a bit as Montez Ford is in at #6.

Holland plants Styles with a slam and then a backdrop as Damian Priest is in at #7. Some near eliminations ensue until Sami Zayn is in at #8 as the intervals is nowhere near ninety seconds. No one is eliminated again so here is Johnny Knoxville in at #9. He actually takes Sami down and hammers away but Styles drops Knoxville with a forearm. Ford hits a splash and Sami Helluva Kicks Knoxville out. It was short, it didn’t hut anything and it was a celebrity appearances. Not my kind of deal, but it wasn’t a problem in the match.

Sami is rather pleased but gets tossed out as well, with Angelo Dawkins in at #10 to replace him. That gives us Styles, Theory, Holland, Ford, Priest and Dawkins. With nothing happening, Omos is in at #11 and gets rid of Ford and Dawkins with back to back eliminations. Styles is sent back first into the post and it’s Ricochet in at #12 with a missile dropkick on Omos. That doesn’t work out so well so Ricochet strikes away, earning himself a big chop.

Chad Gable is in at #13 and rallies the troops, which results in…Priest going after Omos on his own. That means Priest is out so everyone goes after Omos together. This includes Dominik Mysterio coming in at #14 and helping eliminate Omos (though a charging shoulder from AJ helped a bit more). Happy Corbin is in at #15 (the clock might be going even faster) and tosses Ricochet, because that is what Ricochet is doing in WWE. Dolph Ziggler is in at #16 as the ring is filling up again. Deep Six hits Dominik and Corbin throws him out, just as Styles does to Theory (minus the Deep Six).

Sheamus is in at #17 and gets a quick pep talk from Holland, who is tossed during Sheamus’ entrance. Sheamus beats on various people and it’s Rick Boogs in at #18, with McAfee being surprised that he has his own music. Boogs powers Gable around and gorilla presses (with one arm) him out. Madcap Moss is in at #19 as Boogs gorilla presses Ziggler, who manages to save himself. Styles misses the Phenomenal Forearm on Moss and gets caught in Corbin’s chokebreaker.

That’s enough for Moss to toss AJ in quite the surprise as Riddle is in at #20. That gives us Corbin, Ziggler, Sheamus, Boogs, Moss and Riddle, as the first fourteen entrants are already out. After kicking off the flip flops, Riddle suplexes Boogs, who is tossed out by Corbin and Moss without much trouble.

It’s Drew McIntyre in at #21 (which actually surprised me) and that means the big staredown with Corbin and Moss (who put him on the shelf). McIntyre doesn’t waste time in tossing both of them, but he isn’t done. Instead, McIntyre grabs the steps and unloads on the two of them until referees break it up. Kevin Owens is in at #22 and sends McIntyre inside before beating on various people.

Owens even gets creative by stomping on Riddle’s bare feet as Rey Mysterio is in at #23. Rey almost eliminates Riddle but gets caught by a Stunner from Owens. Kofi Kingston is in at #24 and goes up, only to be shoved off by Owens….with his feet hitting the ground. Kingston tried to grab the barricade for his big signature save spot but he just didn’t land right. That’s disappointing, but this was bound to happen at some point as these things got so elaborate. Given what Kofi has done over the years, I’d say one slip is a pretty acceptable result.

Otis is in at #25 and runs some people over until Big E. is in at #26. Big E. gets to clean house as well until Bad Bunny returns at lucky #27. The high crossbody hits Sheamus and there’s a Canadian Destroyer to Riddle. Sheamus goes after Bunny and loads up the Brogue Kick but gets low bridged for a surprise elimination. Bunny helps Rey set up the 619 to Ziggler and then tosses Ziggler as well.

With his luck running strong, Bunny tries to get rid of Rey as Shane McMahon is in at #28 (to a VERY big reaction from commentary). Rey is eliminated by Otis as commentary can’t stop praising Shane. Owens goes after Shane and gets tossed, setting up a showdown with McIntyre (they used to be friends, a long time ago). Hometown boy Randy Orton is in at #29 and seems VERY happy to soak in those cheers. RKBro gets rid of Big E. and it’s jumping/running RKO from Riddle to Otis.

That’s enough to get rid of Otis….but Brock Lesnar is in at #30. We have a final grouping of Riddle, McIntyre, Bunny, McMahon, Orton and Lesnar, which isn’t exactly inspiring. Lesnar cleans house like you would expect him to do and there goes Orton. Bunny gets in Lesnar’s face and gets an F5, setting up another elimination. Lesnar tosses Riddle and Shane, leaving us with Lesnar vs. McIntyre. They slug it out until McIntyre has to escape the F5. The Claymore misses though and Lesnar tosses McIntyre for the win at 51:08.

Rating: C+. This was a better match than the women’s version, mainly because the star power was so much stronger and it didn’t leave me asking “really?” over and over. There were a lot of big names in here, but oddly enough this one suffered from a lack of surprises. You had McIntyre, Bunny and Shane, but other than that and Lesnar (who was there earlier in the night), there was nothing that jumped out. It didn’t have much in the way of comedy and nothing in the way of nostalgia, leaving this as a bit of a dry Rumble.

The other big problem is the ending, as Lesnar came in and erased everything else that ha happened. Lesnar was going to win the Rumble to get us to Reigns vs. Lesnar again, making the 51 minute match little more than a response to an angle that took place two matches earlier. That could have been done in a few ways, but they went with Lesnar being added at the end of a big match to get a title shot. Again.

Overall, this match was good enough, but part of that is due to the amount of bad that filled up the rest of the show. It’s definitely not a great Rumble and the ending left a(nother) bad taste in my mouth, but the McIntyre return and some of the bigger names helped a bit. If nothing else, this was even more proof that cutting so many wrestlers wasn’t a great idea when you need so many for one night.

Lesnar points at the sign so more pyro can go off (which caused the sign to catch on fire AGAIN) and replays can wrap us up.

Overall Rating: C-. It could have been worse, but this was one of the lamer Rumbles, and WWE events in general, in a long time. Nothing on here was exactly great and the two Rumbles highlighted a lot of WWE’s current problems. It feels like we are going to be seeing the same people (and Rousey) taking over another Wrestlemania. That wasn’t interesting in recent years and it isn’t interesting again here.

The biggest thing here is it felt like going back to the well and seeing whatever they can get out of the old names. The Rumble can be a great way to build someone up (like Belair and McIntyre in recent years) but this was designed to build up Rousey and Lesnar, who don’t exactly need the help. Throw in that we are probably getting Lesnar vs. Reigns again and there wasn’t much to get excited about here. The show might not have been horrible, but it was boring and uninspiring, which was a lot worse in this case.

Results
Seth Rollins b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns would not release a guillotine
Ronda Rousey won the women’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Charlotte
Becky Lynch b. Doudrop – Super Manhandle Slam
Bobby Lashley b. Brock Lesnar – Belt shot from Roman Reigns
Edge/Beth Phoenix b. Miz/Maryse – Double Glam Slam
Brock Lesnar won the men’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Drew McIntyre

 

 

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It’s time for things to get serious in WWE and that makes things feel better. WWE tends to know how to get the bigger things right, at least when it comes to the build. That is the case again this time, as the card for the show is looking great. The Rumbles themselves will be fine, but you also have some good looking World Title matches and a pretty stacked mixed tag. Let’s get to it.

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

This is a match that you probably saw coming a few weeks ago as Maryse has been around from the start and Edge kept talking about Phoenix. The story itself has been a bit hit and miss though, as I’m not entirely sure why the four of them are still feuding. The idea of seeing Beth crush Maryse is appealing, though seeing Edge vs. Miz again isn’t the most thrilling.

I’ll go with Miz/Maryse stealing a win here, as it seems to set up a final blowoff match. I’m not sure when that would happen as I can’t imagine stretching this all the way out to WrestleMania, but Elimination Chamber could be a possibility. There is more than enough talent to get through this and the match should be pretty good, but I’m only kind of wanting to watch it.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar(c) vs. Bobby Lashley

Now things get interesting as we have a match that people have been wanting to see for a good while, with Lashley himself having pushed for it for years. When Lashley debuted in OVW, he was billed as Brock Lesnar Times Ten, which is close enough to how the match is being built. Lesnar isn’t going to be able to overpower or maybe even out wrestle Lashley so we’re a bit closer to a stalemate this time around, which takes away what Lesnar is used to.

But dang who in the world wins here? I still can’t imagine that we’re getting Lesnar vs. Reigns title for title at WrestleMania so someone has to lose….and I just don’t think it happens here. We’ll go with Lesnar retaining here, though it’s the one I have rather little confidence in picking. Lashley winning the title back would make sense, but I’ll say Lesnar holds onto the title, at least for now.

Women’s Royal Rumble

The more I think about this one, the less sure I am. WWE has done such a job of making the division so focused on Becky Lynch and Charlotte that it is hard to fathom someone else becoming a big star. While Charlotte is in the Rumble, I’m not sure I can picture her winning while still champion, which should set up a new challenger for either her or Lynch. That leaves a few options….and they are rather slim.

As much as I want to go with the big rumored return or Lita for the sake of setting up the teased Lita vs. Charlotte match, I’ll go stupid and pick Bianca Belair to win a second in a row. She is one of the few women in the match who doesn’t feel like a joke or at least someone there to fill in a spot and that is worth a look. Rousey or Lita might be more likely, but I’ll take what might be a safer pick with Belair.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Doudrop

This is an actual fresh matchup which is almost hard to fathom in modern WWE. I’m glad to see Doudrop basically turning into Viper, because that is an interesting person to watch. Sometimes you need a monster who can wreck some stuff in short order and that is what Viper can do. If nothing else, it is nice to see something different so maybe we could have a better match as a result.

I’ll go with Lynch to retain of course, as Doudrop feels like a monster of the month for her at worst. That is a weird situation for a heel, but ultimately this does not seen to be anything serious for Lynch. It should be a good match though, as Doudrop has done quite a few things well during her time in WWE. Granted the Doudrop run has not exactly gone great overall, but maybe things are changing in a good way.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Seth Rollins

This is one of those matches that makes me wonder how the whole thing is going to go, because you know someone is going to get involved with one of the World Title matches. If Reigns attacked Lesnar to cost him the title, the same thing is likely happening here. Or there is the chance that Lesnar interferes here anyway. That is all beyond the idea of the match itself, which should be rather good.

I’ll go with Reigns retaining here, but again I’m coming into the two title matches completely confused. The Elimination Chamber leaves the option of a last minute change, but we could be in for a couple different options. The good thing is that these two have some great chemistry together and hopefully they can do that again here. We need something good from these two and I can believe it will happen.

Men’s Royal Rumble

I’d like to believe that one of the Royal Rumbles ends the show but that might not be the case this time. For the sake of sanity though, we’ll go with the show’s namesake match actually taking the main event slot. This match is pretty wide open as well, and I’m not sure where that is going to go. There is one name that stands out a bit more than most, but it might be pure false hope.

For some reason, I can’t shake the idea of Big E. winning, even if that might not be the most likely case. I’ll take him to win, but there is also a strong possibility of either Reigns or Lesnar losing their World Title and entering here to set up WrestleMania. It wouldn’t be the most satisfying finish, but ultimately it is a strong chance. From who we have confirmed though, I’ll go with Big E.

Overall Thoughts

The more I look at the card, two things stand out. First of all, the top of WWE’s roster is stacked and they can put on some great combinations. This show is looking good as a result and I’m wanting to see what happens on the show. At the same time, the Rumble matches show you just how weak the rest of the rosters are, as neither match is exactly full of names who could pull this off. The show should be good, but WWE really, really needs to rebuild its roster. Assuming they don’t just release more people instead. For now though, the show looks good and that’s enough hope for one night.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 24, 2022
Location: Huntington Center, Toledo, Ohio
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that could mean a few things. While the show is mostly set on the Raw side, there is always room to get in the final push towards Saturday and odds are that is what we are getting tonight. If nothing else, we have Miz celebrating Maryse’s birthday, which sounds shenanigansy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We’re starting big this week with the official weigh-in between Bobby Lashley (with MVP) and Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman). Lesnar is looking rather casual in jeans and a cowboy hat, which Corey Graves doesn’t like. That earns him a threat, but Lashley goes first and weighs 273lbs. MVP says the match has been in the making for a long time but don’t worry, because Lashley will be gaining weight after the Rumble: the exact same weight as that title.

Lesnar goes next, and does at least take off his hat, allowing him to weigh in at 286lbs. Lashley says Lesnar isn’t taking this serious but Lesnar talks about how Sunday morning, the headlines will read about Lashley winning with the Hurt Lock. Heyman: “What?” Lesnar: “The new WWE Champion: Bobby Who!”

We look at Bianca Belair winning last year’s women’s Royal Rumble.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Bianca Belair vs. Queen Zelina

And yes, after making her entrance before the break and the preview for tonight’s show, we are supposed to believe that Belair has been dancing in the ring for about six minutes straight. Belair wrestles her down to start and hits a dropkick but Zelina kicks her into the corner. A gorilla press and some suplexes put Zelina down again but she’s back up to try a Code Red. That’s blocked with straight power though and the KOD finishes for Belair at 3:50.

Rating: C-. This was little more than a squash, with Belair running Zelina over the whole time. That’s how it should have been too, as Belair is going to be a favorite for the Rumble. Zelina has her crown and lame King Booker impression and that is about all she needs to be doing right now.

Kevin Owens does not like being accused of lying against Damian Priest last week so tonight, he’ll do as the shirt says and Keep On Fighting.

United States Title: Damian Priest vs. Kevin Owens

Priest is defending. Priest starts slugging away in the corner and punches his way out of trouble. The chokeslam is broken up so Owens bails to the floor, only to step away from the threat of a dive. Owens is sent into the barricade instead but still manages to knock Priest off the apron. The Swanton hits raised knees though and we take a break.

Back with Owens hitting a tornado DDT into a frog splash for two. The low superkick doesn’t get Owens much further though as Priest hits his own kick to the face for two of his own. Hold on though as Owens claims another injury but this time, Priest stomps away. The goldbricking lets Owens grab a rollup with tights for two but Priest blasts him with a clothesline. Priest unloads in the corner and the referee finally calls for the DQ at 9:36.

Rating: C+. Remember when Priest unloaded on Dolph Ziggler and got disqualified? Or when he unloaded on Shinsuke Nakamura and got disqualified? Or when WWE had one idea for how to present someone like Priest? I’m glad Priest is getting this much TV time, but can WWE please come up with something new other than this Ken Shamrock IN THE ZONE idea?

We look back at Nikki Ash beating up Rhea Ripley last week.

Rhea Ripley is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Dana Brooke is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Liv Morgan is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Rhea Ripley/Dana Brooke/Liv Morgan vs. Nikki Ash/Carmella/Tamina

During the entrances, Sonya Deville yells at Damian Priest in the back. Doesn’t do anything about it, but she does threaten him. Also, Tamina, Nikki and Carmella are ready to win the Rumble. Tamina knocks Dana into the corner to start so it’s Rhea coming in with a bunch of clotheslines. The basement dropkick rocks Tamina again and everything breaks down. Carmella gets the tag and the Prism Trap finishes for Ripley at 2:21.

Post match Nikki gets in a cheap shot on Rhea and runs off.

We recap RKBro vs. Alpha Academy being set up for an Academic Challenge, because that’s what we watch Raw to see.

And now, a spelling bee between Alpha Academy and RKBro. Before we get started though, Chad Gable makes it clear that this is the first of three events over the next three weeks. He also insults Ohio’s intelligence and brags about his GPA (which he doesn’t spell). RKBro comes out, and we start with Otis spelling some kind of Swiss cheese.

Riddle thinks calibration is pronounced calibrotion and then doesn’t understand he has to spell it himself. Then he gets it right , meaning it’s time to celebrate. Gable brags about how easy his word will be and then misspells dissolution. Orton gets dumbbell to win and now it’s time for Orton vs. Gable. Randy even spells how he’ll win: R-K-O. This could have been worse, but having it go on for three weeks isn’t exactly appealing.

Randy Orton vs. Chad Gable

Feeling out process to start until Gable starts in on the arm. Orton can’t get very far away though as it’s an armdrag into an armbar to put him in trouble. The threat of an RKO sends Gable bailing to the floor but he’s back in to send Orton bailing as well. Orton is fine with going outside though as he drops Gable back first onto the announcers’ table. Otis offers a distraction though and Gables takes out Orton’s knee. The moonsault gets two on Orton and we take a break.

Back with Gable working on his leg some more but Orton fights up for the backbreaker. There’s the hanging DDT but Otis suplexes Riddle on the floor. Gable grabs a backslide for two, only to charge into the powerslam. The RKO is countered into the ankle lock, only to have Riddle jump Otis with the scooter. Orton sends gable into the corner and now the RKO can finish at 13:35.

Rating: B-. Scooter hijinks aside, this was a good match as Gable continues to feel like one of the bigger threats to break through to the next level. I have no reason to believe he ever will, but it feels like the chance is there. Orton pinning him isn’t a bad thing, but I’m not sure about having this Academic Challenge stuff go on for two more weeks.

Post match, Riddle picks next week’s competition: a scooter race!

Bad Bunny has a tour coming.

We recap last week’s therapy session, with Alexa Bliss still being obsessed with Lillie. Someone throws a headset down in the background.

We go to Alexa Bliss back in therapy. This time she is asked about how she met Lillie, sending her into a story about how she was six years old and some girls made fun of her. Then she met Lillie, who took care of them…somehow. They had fun all day and that’s the segment, as we go back to commentary with Bliss still babbling away.

Austin Theory tries to get Vince McMahon to give him a good Royal Rumble number but Vince wants him to focus on AJ Styles. Theory lists off Styles’ resume and goes to leave, but forgets his phone. Vince tells him to bring back a really good selfie.

Veer Mahaan is still coming to Raw.

AJ Styles vs. Austin Theory

Styles starts fast by shrugging Theory off and dropkicking him out to the floor. There’s the slingshot forearm to the floor and Theory is rocked early. Back in and Theory sends him face first into the corner, setting up the quickly broken chinlock. Some chops and kicks to the chest have Theory down and there’s the jumping knee drop.

Theory drops him throat first across the top rope and sends Styles chest first into the buckle. A big crash out to the floor has Styles in more trouble and we take a break. Back with Styles getting kicked in the head and being knocked down again. Styles is able to pop back up with the middle rope moonsault into the reverse DDT though and the comeback is on.

The Phenomenal Blitz sets up the sliding forearm for two on Theory. A belly to back suplex gets Theory out of trouble though and a running Blockbuster gives him two of his own. The Pele drops Theory again but Theory goes to the ropes to escape the Calf Crusher. Back up and Theory breaks up the Phenomenal Forearm but gets caught with his feet on the ropes. Styles is fine enough to get back to the ropes and now the Phenomenal Forearm finishes Theory at 16:56.

Rating: B. These two worked very well together and putting Theory in the ring with someone like Styles is a good idea. I’m still not sure what is going on with the Vince/Theory stuff, but it seems that WWE sees something in Theory in the first place. Styles can be put into any spot on the show and thrive, which is a very useful asset to have.

Ad for WWE2K22.

We get a sitdown interview between Becky Lynch and Doudrop, with Becky talking about how confident she is and Doudrop not buying Becky being this good. Becky didn’t hear a thank you for putting Doudrop in the biggest match of her career. She brings up Doudrop attacking her last week to cost them a tag match, but Doudrop can’t hear anything because the whining makes her zone out. Doudrop gets up and marches into Becky’s studio to drive her into a wall. Referees break it up in a hurry.

We look back at Rey Mysterio tossing his son Dominik over the top last week in a Royal Rumble preview.

Rey is very pleased with being on the cover of WWE2K22. Dominik is ready to win the Royal Rumble, but Rey says that means throwing him out. Rey: “He’s just kidding.”

Street Profits vs. Mysterios

Dominik sends Dawkins outside to start and hits a dive, leaving Ford to backdrop Rey onto Dominik (for a nearly scary crash) on the floor. Ford hits a big running dive of his own and we take a break. Back with Dawkins dropping Dominik with a right hand for two but the hot tag brings in Rey to pick up the pace. Ford launches Rey into the air for the big crash, setting up the rolling splash for two. Dominik breaks it up but the double 619 is cut off by Dawkins. Rey victory rolls Ford for the pin at 7:51.

Rating: C+. The flips and dives were good here with both teams getting the chance to show what they can do in the air. Rey is likely to get a big push going forward towards the video game launch, but it isn’t like losing to a former World Champion is going to kill the Profits’ momentum. You know, assuming they had any.

Post match Dominik tries to dump Rey but gets tossed out for his efforts. The Profits throw them out but get dumped by Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode. The Profits and the Mysterios get back in to clear the ring but don’t trust each other.

Smackdown Rebound.

Seth Rollins knows he has Roman Reigns’ number and he’ll prove it at the Royal Rumble. For this week though, he’ll be at Smackdown too.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Here is Miz for Maryse’s big birthday celebration. There are all kinds of gifts and paintings around, so here is Maryse to open everything. Miz opens the first present, which is a portrait of the two of them as a prince and princess, which has to be looked at from the side as the straight on shot leaves it with a glare that makes it impossible to see. The second gift: what looks like a bedazzled jewelry box.

Now she wants the big gift, which Miz doesn’t recognize. Miz thinks there is something going on here and tells security to open the gift. It’s…..a brick on a stand. Miz laughs a lot and we see Maryse hitting Beth Phoenix in the back of the head with the loaded purse last week. With that out of the way, it’s time for Miz to sing Happy Birthday but Edge and Beth Phoenix interrupt.

Edge threatens violence and they run through security without much trouble. The presents are wrecked and more security is beaten up, including with a Hart Attack and a 3D for some fun. Miz and Maryse panic as another guard is powerbombed through the cake to end the show. This was pretty by the book but Miz and Maryse are great at this kind of thing.

Overall Rating: C+. There were some rocky points on this show but the mostly good wrestling carried everything else. The World Title match didn’t get a lot of attention here, but ultimately that match is going to sell itself. This show was more about the Royal Rumble matches and those are the ones that have not gotten a ton of attention. Oh and there was a spelling bee.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Queen Zelina – KOD
Kevin Owens b. Damian Priest via DQ when Priest attacked in the corner
Rhea Ripley/Dana Brooke/Liv Morgan b. Tamina/Carmella/Nikki Ash – Prism Trap to Carmella
Randy Orton b. Chad Gable – RKO
AJ Styles b. Austin Theory – Phenomenal Forearm
Mysterios b. Street Profits – Victory roll to Ford

 

 

 

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