ECW on TNN – March 17, 2000: The Great Divide

ECW on TNN
Date: March 17, 2000
Location: Asbury Park Convention Center, Asbury Park, New Jersey
Attendance: 2,300
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

It’s the show after Living Dangerously and a few things have changed. First and foremost, Super Crazy of all people won the TV Title, beating Rhyno in the finals. We also have new tag team champions with the Impact Players getting the belts back, putting us right back where we were before the fast title changes happened. The next PPV isn’t until May so we’ve got time to build to the next bad show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a brawl from some undetermined show with the Impact Players beating Nova and Chris Chetti to retain the titles. We only saw the last 75 seconds or so.

Opening sequence, but instead of the usual stuff we get a recap of the PPV.

RVD and Super Crazy are in the back with Rob saying Crazy is nice for carrying his belt. Crazy should get all the perks: limousine rides, champagne, green cards, all that good stuff. Just remember that Rob is coming back to get his title back.

Angel vs. Sandman

After about four minutes of intros and a break we have all of Da Baldies laying out Sandman so Angel can talk trash while beating on him. A cane shots from Skull gets two for Angel but Sandman throws him out to the floor. Sandman beats all of Da Baldies down and heads to the back for a piece of guardrail.

Angel gets crushed and we head back inside for more left hands from Sandman. The rail is set up in the corner but Angel comes back with more right hands, only to be sent into the rail in the corner. Sandman gets crotched on the rail but Vito accidentally hits Angel with the cane. Sandy pounds away on all of them and pins Angle after breaking the cane over his head.

Rating: D-. This was your usual ECW hardcore mess. The match wasn’t any good and to even call it a match is a big stretch. Sandman was popular though so the fans were into him which is the right idea. It doesn’t do New Jack any favors though as he’s fought Da Baldies for months now with no success.

Cyrus is sitting next to Rhyno and says this started as business but has become personal. He wants to kill off the ECW phenomenon and Rhyno says no one is safe.

Joel implies Cyrus and Rhyno are lovers.

Steve Corino is in the ring with Jack Victory and wants to know when he got heat with the office. He just wanted to be on TV once in awhile and doesn’t want his match tonight.

Steve Corino vs. New Jack

New Jack’s song begins and the beating is quickly on. This is one of those “matches” which involves nothing but weapons shots because New Jack doesn’t seem to know how to wrestle. Joel: “He’s beating Corino like a lapdancing midget at a funeral.” Joey: “What he said.” A guitar shot puts Corino down and draws in Jack Victory to try to save his buddy.

They head to the floor with New Jack taking over as they head towards the balcony. We take a break and come back with Victory strapped to a table as New Jack dives from the balcony to destroy everyone in sight. Back in and Rhyno runs in to Gore New Jack, giving Steve the pin.

Rating: N/A. Considering this was a four minute “match” which was mostly spent on a big balcony dive before someone not even involved in the match caused the end, what kind of a rating do you think I’m going to give it? I can’t stand New Jack as he’s completely against what wrestling is supposed to be. When you make Sandman look like a skilled grappler, something isn’t right.

Spike Dudley is out 9 months for knee surgery.

House show ads.

Raven talks about having his woman taken from him and tells Tommy to pretend life is a game of cards. The cards are finely blown glass and as they build trust, they turn over more and more cards. Then one day the cards are swept away and shattered, leaving both guys wanting the cards intact again. Didn’t they just want to play a game? The camera pan up to show Francine dressed like Raven and doing his pose and catchphrase.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka

Awesome is defending. The referee does a weapons check but as soon as the bell rings Judge Jeff Jones throws in a chair. Tanaka grabs one of his own and we get the dueling chair spots until they cave each others’ heads in with chair shots. Tanaka hits a running forearm in the corner and a dropkick sends Awesome to the floor. Mike gets a boot up to knock a chair into Tanaka’s face and drops him ribs first over the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Tanaka dropping Awesome with a tornado DDT and getting two off a missile dropkick. Awesome grabs a quick chokebomb for a near fall of his own and a Batista Bomb gets the same. The Awesome Splash gets the third straight two count and it’s table time. Surprisingly enough Tanaka is put through it with no reversal before being rammed into the corner for two again.

Here’s another table because just one isn’t a title match in ECW. Tanaka breaks up an Awesome Splash through the table and superplexes the champion through the wood to put both guys down. There’s the Roaring Elbow to knock Awesome out but Jones has the referee. Cue Raven to lay out Tanaka and the referee with DDTs for no explained reasons. Tanaka is powerbombed through a table on the floor and here’s Tommy Dreamer for the save, only to get caught in a DDT as well. Dreamer is powerbombed through a table as well and the match is thrown out.

Rating: C. The match was fun as usual but we get the idea already: Tanaka and Awesome can beat the tar out of each other. The idea here is that Raven and Awesome are the latest evil partnership but we kind of got that idea when they won the tag titles. I’m just over this match already and I have no need to ever see it again.

Overall Rating: D. I can’t remember a company with a bigger divide between the main event and everything else. The main event stories take up the last third of the show and the rest of the episode was just random brawling with no stories to be seen anywhere. Nothing to see here, but this just felt like a wasted episode.

 

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On This Day: September 19, 1999 – Anarchy Rulz 1999: Goodbye Taz, Goodbye Sanity

Anarchy Rulz 1999
Date: September 19, 1999
Location: Odeum Expo Center, Villa Park, Illinois
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Cyrus

And so it dies here. No not the company as they held onto life, if you want to call it that, for about another 16 months after this. Taz leaves here though, as WWF came with a huge sum of money about three weeks after ECW debuted on TNN. The Dudleys already left about two weeks earlier. Word has gotten out that Taz is leaving too, so don’t expect him to be incredibly over tonight. Other than that, there isn’t much on the card. Storm vs. Lynn should be fun though. Let’s get to it.

We see Masato Tanaka showing up. He’s the number one contender. I’m not sure but I think that was Dave Prazak doing the interview. Awesome’s manager shows up and doesn’t like Tanaka. He gets smacked.

Cyrus and Joey do the intro you would expect before we throw it to the theme song.

Lance Storm vs. Jerry Lynn

We start with this? Really? I guess part of anarchy is that we’re getting rid of the best match right off the bat for some reason. Dawn Marie’s dress is almost not even there. These are two of my favorites from ECW so I’ll be pleased with this more than likely. Jerry’s ribs are messed up because the Impact Players beat him up about a week before.

Lance Storm having his own personal chick is rather amusing. Crowd is pretty one sided to say the least. We have a nice technical piece to start. Did you expect anything else? The fans applaud which is always a good sign. ECW fans were fair if nothing else. I’ve always liked Joey’s mentioning of the referees. They work extremely hard and rarely get the credit that they deserve. Storm’s chops kind of suck.

There’s a bad delay right before it connects and it makes them look really weak. The fans get bored with the match and would like to see something from Dawn. Cyrus gets a nice line in by saying that Storm is a step ahead of Gene Kiniski who was billed as Canada’s Greatest Athlete: he’s CALGARY’S Greatest Athlete. That’s a great line and could be solid for a heel in a territorial promotion.

The referee yells at someone at ringside for a LONG time with his eyes totally away from the action. Nice one guys. Jerry hits a nice plancha from the top rope to the floor and down goes Storm. Having Cyrus as an analyst is a GREAT help. Joey is fun to listen to but there is simply too much to have one guy do. That’s not a knock on Styles. It’s too much for anyone. Having an analyst in there takes a ton of pressure off of Joey and it’s helping a lot.

Cradle piledriver is blocked. Again, can someone explain the difference to me? SWEET pinfall reversal sequence that goes on for nearly a minute straight. That’s VERY impressive and literally gets a standing ovation from the crowd. They go wide to show it and they well should. Amazing stuff as I knew it would be. Cyrus points out that he used to be a wrestler which is something that needs to be done more often.

TNA has been doing it more often lately as they point out that Taz used to be a wrestler. He’s been retired what, 9 years or so? A LOT of fans likely haven’t seen him wrestle. How long has it been for King? Point out to the fans that he actually has experience. Jerry is a former world champion as is Taz. Let the fans know that once in awhile. There’s a chair wedged in the corner that hasn’t been doing anything yet.

Lynn is thrown into the corner but slides to avoid the steel macguffin. He slams his ribs into the post though and Storm goes after it like a Hart-trained wrestler attempting to use basic psychology. Lynn hits a Stunner out of nowhere to get us back to even. I love when wrestlers just bust out random moves.

It makes no sense that so many guys only use their signature stuff. Use whatever comes to mind, at least in kayfabe terms. Storm hits a knee to the ribs and hooks a ¾ nelson of all things for the clean pin? That came out of NOWHERE. It’s fine to end it that way as it looked solid, but DANG was that random.

Rating: A-. I loved this and yes it’s biased. Even still though, this was very solid stuff. See what happens with simple psychology and good wrestling? It works very well indeed and you get a great match that I was way into. This worked and to be fair it’s probably because they’re two of my favorites in ECW.

Joey and Cyrus argue about “the office.”

Simon Diamond is here. He used to sleep with Dawn Marie so he’s awesome. He talks in the 3rd person but has none of Rock’s talent so there you go. He is looking for a partner and asks for Tom Marquez who graduated from the House of Hardcore. And that’s not good enough because Simon didn’t say it. There is no man here to fight Simon. And cue Jazz. Apparently he’s looking for a partner. Which is why he asked for someone to fight. Got it.

She’s a face at this point and is in no way shape or form a Chyna rip-off. Nope, not at all is she, the woman that looks tough and is overly muscular and fighting men a rip-off of Chyna. Not at all. Diamond runs his mouth off and yells at Marquez, the timekeeper tonight, to fight Jazz. Sure why not.

Jazz vs. Tom Marquez

Jazz gets beaten up for awhile and then hits a mat slam for a long two but a guy named Tony DeVito pulls the referee out. Yeah this wasn’t a match. 45 seconds at most.

Chris Chetti and Nova run out for the save and apparently THIS is a tag match now.

Chris Chetti/Nova vs. Tony DeVito/Simon Diamond

Apparently Nova is the most ripped off wrestler in the world as whatever he invents is on Monday night the next week. While that’s true to an extent, I’ll let it go and let Mr. Joey Pot and Cyrus Kettle, call this match. Wow that Jazz is BLACK. WOW that joke sucked. Anyway, you get the idea I think. DeVito goes for a Rock Bottom and botches the living tar out of it. And after about two minutes Danny Doring and Roadkill along with that redhead chick named Angelica run out for the DQ. Yes it’s Lita.

Rating: N/A. Two minutes of just boring stuff.

They hit Jazz with the Hart Attack. A ton of jobbers come out to stop Roadkill and it’s just a massive brawl. And now we get the point to all this: it’s New Jack. Oh why does he have to come back? I’m sure you know my thoughts on New Jack by now. One of the jobbers in there is the semi-famous Big Vito.

Staple gun to the head of some guy. And we do it again. Make it three times. I hate New Jack. I truly do. Nova and Chetti seem to like him though. Ok to be fair, the crowd is going nuts over this.

Tour ad.

Cyrus and Joey argue some more.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy vs. Little Guido

During the entrances, Joey says he’s more or less high on laryngitis medications. Ok then. Tajiri is in his traditional look now. Crowd seems to favor Crazy the best. They point out the three distinct styles here which is a nice touch. Well this is better than another combination them going one on one again I guess. Oh and Big Sal is now the Big Salbowski. Give me a break.

Yes I get that it’s an intentional parody, but if this was the other way around, ECW would be FREAKING over WWF taking another idea from them. When ECW does it, it’s a parody though. Yeah that’s annoying. The chant of Where’s My Pizza starts up. WOW those get annoying. It’s your basic spotfest to start: stupid but fun. Guido hooks a camel clutch on Crazy and Tajiri kicks the tar out of him. They set for it again and Tajiri kicks the heck out of Guido. Nice one.

Tajiri hits a picture perfect moonsault to the floor to take out both guys. It was of the Asai breed in case you were curious. Guido hits a second rope Fameasser which looked good. Not sure why but it did. Crazy one ups Tajiri by hitting a top rope Asai moonsault and lands ON HIS FEET. That was awesome looking. In a SICK spot, Tajiri goes for a sunset flip on Crazy but it’s blocked. Tajiri pulls himself back up, spins crazy around and hooks the Tarantula.

Guido throws in a great double foot to the face. That was one of the coolest things I’ve seen in a long time. Guido gets the Sicilian Crab at the same time Crazy gets a camel clutch. Tajiri was totally off the ground. Ton of sick spots in this match. That baseball slide dropkick in the Tree of Woe is always great. Crazy follows that up with a moonsault to put Guido out.

It’s elimination rules in case you didn’t get that so we’re down to Tajiri and Crazy. The ten punch count being in Spanish is always a nice touch. The handspring elbow hits for Tajiri. We get a Super Loco chant. When they get creative like that I can live with them. Tajiri blocks the triple moonsault and just goes off on Crazy. A SICK brainbuster ends it.

Rating: B-. This is an odd match. The spots were great and I liked them a lot, but I just could not get into the match as a whole if that makes sense. I think it’s because this has been done so many times now that there’s just no real reason to care about this match. It was fun, but there’s just nothing of substance to it. Nice spot fest though.

We throw it to Steve Corino who says they were going to bring in the Insane Clown Posse to fight Raven and Dreamer tonight. And they’re not here. Corino was the manager apparently and brought them in. Instead Raven and Dreamer get Rhino and Corino. Ok then.

Billy Corgin is here.

They rant about WCW or something or other for awhile.

Justin Credible vs. Sabu

Does anyone else find it stupid that ECW says Sabu is genocidal? That’s just a bit of overkill. Sabu was banned for no apparent reason. Justin has a restraining order. Sacre bleu. What a waste of my time. Yes I quoted Smart Guy of all things. The referee says it’s a legal document, but there is no law tonight since Anarchy Rulz. Justin drills the announcer for saying it and the lights go out. Let’s get to it.

Apparently the Impact Players got him banned for being too violent. Fonzie gets a table for Sabu. Justin gets a Russian leg sweep on the ramp which looked good. I’d expect that’s the only wrestling move for awhile. Sabu goes through a table for some reason. Did anyone care about Credible? I don’t really think so. We get a vague Kliq reference which Justin was a part of in the back.

Sabu hits a big spot and Joey calls it indescribable just before he, say it with me, DESCRIBES IT. A bunch of overblown table spots follow. I don’t care either. So since Justin is having his head handed to him, I’m more or less counting down the time until the SHOCKING yes SHOCKING I SAY comeback that gives Justin the win. Cyrus finds Fonzie annoying. That’s very amusing. Justin is bleeding fairly badly.

A kendo stick shot gets two but Sabu has his foot on the ropes. Ok, so legally binding documents aren’t legal, but the ropes are. Got it. That’s Incredible gets two. Fonzie slides in a chair but it hits Sabu in the head. Nice one. BAD looking tombstone (That’s Incredible) on the chair ends it.

Rating: D-. The only word that came to my mind here was meh. I just totally did not care here for a few reasons. One, it’s Justin Credible. Two, you bring Sabu back to have him job? What sense does that make? The match was so sloppy and just bad. Didn’t like this at all, mainly due to the idiotic booking as Heyman continues to insist that Justin is some ring god.

ECW World Title: Masato Tanaka vs. Taz

No intro or anything. Joey just says it’s time for our world title match. The fans throw a TON of stuff into the ring because of Taz. He sold out apparently. No. Heyman screwed up the booking of him because no one cared about him as a face after he whined for a year and Shane Douglas wouldn’t drop the title like he should have. I still say that had as much to do with killing ECW as anything did.

That and not putting the belt on RVD about 5 months before this. Mike Awesome is in the crowd and Taz says send him in there too. Heyman comes out and holds Awesome back. I love how the fans go from YOU SOLD OUT to yelling his catchphrase with him inside of a minute. Remember that officially Taz hasn’t been announced as leaving yet but it’s the worst kept secret in wrestling. Heyman makes it a threeway.

So yeah add Mike Awesome to the title because I’m lazy. Oh and Awesome is in wrestling gear in the crowd. I’m shocked too. They double team him and that doesn’t work at all. Tanaka takes an Awesome Bomb. And then the Roaring Elbow and Awesome Splash puts Taz out in about two minutes. There you go then.

The locker room empties so that everyone can say goodbye to Taz. Yeah this was a total secret right? Awesome hits a sweet Tope (Taker Dive) to the floor to take Tanaka down. This is your standard solid match with these two. Naturally chairs and tables are brought into play but you have to expect that in ECW. Tanaka hits a Tornado DDT on a chair for two.

And Tanaka gets powerbombed over the top to the floor through a table. Top rope splash follows that for two. Ok then. Tanaka no sells three LOUD chair shots and this Diamond Dust which is an awesome move. It’s table time again with Awesome in control again. Awesome hits a top rope powerbomb for the pin. Yeah that works but a chair shot to the head from the top doesn’t? Taz hands him the belt after the match. The roster says goodbye to Taz as no one cares about Axl Rotten. The fans loving Taz now is kind of stupid. Taz tells them to chant for Awesome. Nice touch there.

Rating: B. Usual good stuff here from these two, but at times the no selling gets annoying as all goodness. Still though, this was a shock to some people and it was a nice touch throwing Awesome in there as people knew Taz was losing, so here we didn’t know who was leaving with the belt. This was good.

Raven is hanging out by a swing and runs down the majority of the feud between him and Dreamer. The “It’s Tommy’s” line gets me every time. And no, I’m not running down that whole feud. The thing was excellent though. Raven and Dreamer are tag champions at the moment. Raven says he let Dreamer beat him that night. This is the Raven that everyone loved and he was awesome. He quotes Keyser Soze. How awesome is that?

Gertner comes out to interrupt the announcer and the crowd pops. And here are Francine and Dreamer. Man in the Box is always awesome so I can’t complain. To get it over with, the Dudleys were leaving and Dreamer stood up to them. Raven ran in to be his partner and they won the tag titles. They hate each other though and Dreamer is hurt badly so Raven is making him wrestle until he’s crippled.

Simple in a way I guess. Dreamer says he won’t be cutting a babyface promo. And cue the babyface promo. He’s going to wrestle no matter what the doctors say. And here’s Corino so I’d bet we’re getting a tag title match. Ok never mind as it’s a singles match with Rhino. Pay no attention to the fact that they said there would be a tag title match later tonight with these three and Raven which is inevitable. Yeah I’m not even counting this as a match because Raven is just killing time before he gets here. They’re just wasting time and HERE’S Raven.

Tag Titles: Raven/Tommy Dreamer vs. Steve Corino/Rhino

Jack Victory, the sidekick of Corino and Rhino comes in to help and a double DDT ends this about 12 seconds after Raven gets there.

Rating: N/A. Can someone tell me when the match ended and when it started?

Mancow, some annoying DJ that had TWO WCW PPV matches comes out with some fat guys since we have a ton of time left. They do nothing other than high five Raven and leave. WOW.

Ad for November to Remember.

So with 35 minutes left in the tape there’s just RVD to go.

Axl Rotten comes out to talk. Seriously, why does this guy keep getting on PPV? He wants the shot at Awesome. Please come murder him. Instead it’s the Impact Players and a British guy named Johnny Smith. Apparently Smith vs. RVD is the main event. Rotten says the people are cheering for the women and not the talent.

Insert your Becca joke here. Balls Mahoney and Spike come in for the save and Dawn gets hit with an Acid Drop. Smith takes a BIG chair shot and leaves. So Balls gets the title shot instead. Oh dear.

ECW TV Title: Balls Mahoney vs. Rob Van Dam

And we have half an hour to go and this is the main event. Oh DANG this could be painful. So we have Lynn who is obsessed with beating Van Dam and we get….Balls Mahoney vs. RVD. And people wonder why this company died. So Van Dam walks around for a few minutes to kill time. Wouldn’t a five minute match be a better use of time?

Oh that’s right: that army of jobbers had to be beaten up by New Jack instead of having a quick match. So with 25 minutes to go, NO ONE buys Mahoney having a prayer here. Seriously, they’re just blatantly wasting time now. I can’t get over Balls Mahoney main eventing a PPV. Seriously, no one cares about this match at all. All I’m doing is watching the clock on the player to wait until this is over.

Are those punches Balls throws supposed to be impressive or something? Van Dam hits a nice dive from the top into the crowd. And that ends anything interesting in this match. Seriously, the rest is more or less nothing but punches, kicks, chair shots and Balls doing moves he botches. This got TWENTY MINUTES.

Yeah I skipped a lot of the details here, but other than managing to kill an ECW crowd in a town like Chicago, this is the least interesting main event I can ever remember. Just terrible. A video package of the show fills in the final three minutes of the show.

Rating: F. Balls Mahoney main evented a PPV. That should be a meme somewhere for EPIC FAIL.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t completely terrible. There are some good matches here, but good night the stuff that sucked was sucking hard. The opener and world title match were both very solid but the rest is completely forgettable. The three way cruiserweight match was fine for what it was but it’s been done WAY too much for me to care again. Not completely terrible, but nothing worth seeing. Storm and Lynn and the title match are good though.

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ECW on TNN – March 10, 2000: In Search Of A New Wrestling Mastermind

ECW on TNN
Date: March 10, 2000
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

It’s the go home show for Living Dangerously and the main story….is up for debate actually. It could be Dreamer and Tanaka winning the tag titles on a fluke last week. It could be (and likely is) Heyman and company going to war with the Network. It could be Dusty vs. Corino. Either way, none of these feuds have had matches announced for the PPV, but maybe we’ll get something tonight. Let’s get to it.

Joey and Joel are in the ring for the intro for the first time in a few weeks. Joel actually gets to finish him limerick this week by saying that after tonight’s show in Philly, he’ll be riding Cyrus’ mom silly. This of course draws out Cyrus but even Joey goes off on him this time, saying he won’t interview a jerk like Cyrus.

Opening sequence.

Cyrus is still in the ring as the fans chant for RVD. We FINALLY get some matches announced for the PPV as tonight we’ll start a TV Title tournament which will end at the PPV. Bill Alfonzo comes out but Cyrus keeps ranting, saying he’s canceling ECW on TNN to be replaced by Extreme Championship Shuffleboard. This brings out RVD with the title and his ankle wrapped up. Before we get to that though, here’s a PPV ad so we can pay the talent.

Also a hotline ad.

Back in the arena with Scotty Anton (Riggs) standing by RVD’s side. Cyrus makes fun of Riggs but Rob shoves him away and praises Riggs for his loyalty. Yeah the screwjob is coming a mile away. Anyway Rob says his leg is getting better and he’s still in the gym to stay in shape. Rob talks about watching ECW grow for years now and about how he’s never left for greener pastures. He isn’t going to let Cyrus screw up everything ECW has done no matter how badly he’s hurt.

Rob throws down the belt and vows to take the title back from whomever Cyrus gets it on and he’ll do it here on TNN. Cyrus and Fonzie are about to get into it but Rhyno gores Fonzie down. Rob and Rhyno get into it but Anton pulls RVD away before he’s injured even worse. Cyrus wants to start this tournament right now.

TV Title Tournament Quarter-Finals: Rhyno vs. Spike Dudley

Spike scores with a quick neckbreaker and gets two off a small package. A sunset flip gets the same and Spike low bridges a charging Rhyno out to the floor. Back from a break with Spike being thrown off a balcony onto but not through some tables. Back to ringside with Rhyno being sent into the barricade and a bulldog gets two for Spike.

Spike takes a chair to the top but dives into a left hand to the ribs to put him down. A TKO gets two for Rhyno and he sets up a table in the corner. Spike comes back with the Acid Drop but here come all the heels to break it up. The distraction lets Rhyno Gore him through the table, injuring Spike’s knee in the process. A piledriver sends Rhyno to the semi-finals at the PPV, apparently against Sandman who beat Tajiri in a non-televised match.

Rating: D. I’m over this Spike the Giant Killer schtick. We get it: you have ONE MOVE that can stop big guys but people are going to interfere in case it’s a top level monster. It’s the same idea of X-Pac being able to hit the X-Factor and win matches against guys he has no business being in the ring against. In other words, COME UP WITH SOMETHING ELSE.

Spike is being taken to the hospital.

Jado/Gedo vs. Impact Players

This is also from the same show but it’s being shown out of order for some reason. I think Gedo is starting against Credible with the Players in early control. Off to Storm for a dropkick and a bunch of trash talking (yes from Lance Storm) before it’s back to Credible for a chinlock. Gedo tries to fight up but gets taken down by a clothesline and it’s back to Storm for right hands. Gedo flips out of a German suplex and clotheslines Storm down, allowing for the tag off to Jado.

Storm gets crotched on the top and belly to back superplexed down. Everything breaks down and both teams score some hot near falls. Back to Justin as the chair is thrown out of the ring, only to be replaced by a table. Jado reverses a hiptoss to send Credible through the table before catching Storm in a tiger driver. A top rope splash from Gedo gets two and Justin is dropkicked to the floor. Jado gets two off a middle rope powerbomb but Gedo walks into a superkick and gets caught in a spike piledriver for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a fun match for the most part when they ignored the violent nonsense. I can usually overlook insanity and rules breaking down in tag matches because it makes for the most interesting stuff. Also, how nice was it to see actual TAGS in a tag team match? Fun stuff here.

We’re FINALLY given more PPV matches with Dreamer/Tanaka defending against the Impact Players and Mike Awesome/Raven (never been on screen together that I remember) and Corino vs. Dusty Rhoes in a bullrope match.

Tag Titles: Raven/Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka/Tommy Dreamer

Sure why not. Awesome throws Dreamer around to start before it’s off to Raven for some cheap shots. Dreamer gets up and Raven runs off to bring Mike back in. Tanaka gets the tag as well to give us the same match we’ve been watching for three months. Awesome wins a slugout and gets two off a quick splash. Tanaka sends him face first into the middle buckle and scores with a missile dropkick for no cover. Awesome counters the tornado DDT into a sitout spinebuster but he tags Raven instead of covering.

We get our first chair but Tanaka channels his inner Samoan and no sells the shot to the head. Tanaka elbows him in the head for two and Raven is sent into the chair in the corner. Dreamer pounds away and puts Raven in the Tree of Woe for the standing on the crotch spot. Awesome uses the distraction to powerbomb Dreamer out of the corner to give Raven two. Back to Mike for a middle rope back elbow, getting another near fall.

A choke bomb gets two more on Dreamer so it’s back to Raven. Bird Boy grabs a mic and pounds it into Dreamer’s head as Raven talks trash to Tommy. Dreamer does the smart thing by kicking Raven low but the back is too hurt to tag. A bulldog gets two on Dreamer and it’s table time. Awesome misses the splash through the table and Dreamer makes the tag off to Tanaka. He cleans house on both challenges but Awesome takes him down with a release German suplex.

Everything breaks down and Judge Jeff Jones sends in two more tables. Masato loads up a superplex through the table but gets crotched on the top instead. Dreamer loads up a Death Valley Driver off the top, only to be pulled down by Raven and sent face first into the edge of the table with the drop toehold. That looked SICK.

The Awesome Splash is only good for two and the Awesome Bomb through the table gets the same thanks to a save by Tanaka. The Roaring (discus) elbow gets two on Raven and the Dreamer DDT gets the same. Awesome hits the running Awesome Bomb through the table on Dreamer, allowing Raven to get the pin and the titles.

Rating: D+. This was actually something almost kind of resembling the tag team formula. It’s certainly not a good match but at least there was some kind of a flow to it. The booking on the other hand continues to be stupid as there’s no real reason to change the titles around like this other than to set up the three way dance. Raven vs. Dreamer and Tanaka vs. Awesome are played out, but Heyman, the GENIUS, can’t come up with anything new so this is what we’re stuck with.

Sinister Minister does his recap of the show and laughs a lot. Is there a point to this guy?

Overall Rating: D+. Well it wasn’t as bad as last week’s show but that isn’t saying much. We do at least have something set up for Sunday which is more than I was expecting to have by the end of the show. Some of the wrestling here wasn’t terrible and the less Sandman nonsense I have to sit through the better.

Here’s Living Dangerously if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/12/on-this-day-march-12-2000-living-dangerously-2000-two-ecw-shows-in-a-month-is-dangerous-enough/

 

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ECW on TNN – March 3, 2000: ECW Can Bend Time And Space

ECW on TNN
Date: March 3, 2000
Location: The Rave, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 2,250
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

This show has to be better that last week’s. Literally, it’s not possible to produce a show worse than last week’s so soon thereafter. We still don’t have anything announced for the PPV which is in nine days. Odds are there will be a tournament of some sort for the TV Title at the show but since nothing has been announced yet, it’s hard to say. Let’s get to it.

Mike Awesome says it’s personal between him and Spike Dudley.

Theme song.

ECW World Title: Spike Dudley vs. Mike Awesome

Spike jumps Mike with a chair but goes after Judge Jeff Jones, allowing Awesome to crush Spike’s head with a chair. More chair shots to the head follow and Dudley is busted open. Mike has a table set up on the floor but Spike rakes the eyes to escape a gorilla press slam. Dudley rains down right hands in the corner but charges into an elbow to put him back down. Now Spike is launched over the top and through the table….as we go to a PPV ad.

Back with Spike bulldogging Awesome through a table off the stage and the Acid Drop gets two on the ring with Jones breaking up the pin. Awesome breaks up another Acid Drop attempt and hits a wicked release German suplex to lay Spike out. Three BIG powerbombs kill Spike but he raises his shoulder to tick Awesome off again. A table is set up in the corner and a running powerbomb through the table finally ends Spike.

Rating: D+. Ok now can we get someone other than Spike or Tanaka for Awesome to defend the title against? This pairing has been done to death and we’ve got the idea down pretty clearly already. The match was the same as it always is: Spike tries hard but gets destroyed by power in the end. Somehow this was the best match in two weeks on the show.

Masato Tanaka rants in Japanese when Dawn Marie comes in to tell him to shut up. He yells at her and the Impact Players come in to lay him out.

Joel’s limerick is cut off again.

Steve Corino is in the ring to talk about something. Erik Watts, one of the most worthless wrestlers of all time, is his opponent tonight and has a belt of some sort with him, which apparently is the old Mid-South Heavyweight Title. Sure why not. Corino talks about how the two of them are a lot alike in their old school beliefs such as hating tables and chairs. He doesn’t want to bleed for these losers in Milwaukee and the fans aren’t pleased. Corino talks about how things were in the old days and insults Dusty Rhodes a bit. Tonight it’s a Texas bullrope match to keep it old school.

Steve Corino vs. Erik Watts

It’s the four corners variety but we’re still not ready because Corino has more cheap heat jokes. He talks about how the Crusher (the Man Who Made Milwaukee Famous) was a closet homosexual and a sexual deviant (Joel: “That’s a bad thing?). The referee (future indy guy H.C. Loc) says he’s from Milwaukee and insults Corino, leading to a big beatdown from Watts, Jack Victory and Corino.

The fans chant for Dusty but Corino says he retired Dusty last week (two weeks ago sport). However, Corino wants Dusty to come out of retirement for a bullrope match because Dusty is the reason Jim Crockett went out business, the reason the WWF almost went out of business in 1989 (not really) and the man who cut the brake lines on Magnum T.A.’s car.

Super Crazy vs. Tajiri vs. Little Guido

Elimination rules. Guido is knocked to the floor to start, allowing Crazy and Tajiri to fly around the mat for a bit as only they can do. Crazy goes to the floor as Guido comes back in for a kick from Tajiri. Guido takes Tajiri down into a Fujiwara Armbar as Crazy is down from something the camera missed. Guido chops Tajiri and double teams him along with Crazy.

Tajiri comes back with a kick to Crazy’s head and goes outside with Guido. Crazy busts out an Asai Moonsault to take both guys down and lands on his feet just to show off. Big Sal misses a splash on Crazy against the barricade, allowing Crazy to dive onto the big fat guy. So it’s Crazy alone in the ring until Tajiri comes back in for the Tarantula. Guido makes the save before catching Crazy in a kind of reverse powerbomb out of the corner for two.

Tajiri’s handspring elbow is countered into a Russian legsweep from Guido, only to have Crazy take him down with a running DDT for two. Tajiri brainbusters Guido for the elimination to get us down to one on one. Crazy kicks him out to the floor but misses the Asai Moonsault, allowing Tajiri to kick him in the jaw. Back in and the handspring elbow connects on Crazy but he no sells a low dropkick to the face. Because, you know, being kicked in the face doesn’t hurt or anything. Crazy hits a jumping Tajiri low (that came out of nowhere) and a top rope Lionsault gets the pin on Tajiri.

Rating: C. See, this is what ECW needs to do more often: throw talented guys out there and let them show off. There were no weapons used in this and the fans still seemed to like it. Yeah Sal interfered but that’s minor by comparison to what usually happens on this show. The match wasn’t great or anything but it was easy to sit through and by comparison to the drek I’ve been sitting through, it was a masterpiece.

House show ads.

Cyrus complains that the three way dance was a ratings killer so he has Rhyno Gore Crazy through a locker.

We get a clip from Hardcore TV of Francine coming out to face Dreamer after Dreamer apologized for DDTing her last week. She takes a sharp turn by saying people are here to see her topless rather than to see Dreamer fighting. Dreamer isn’t good enough to survive without her because she got him over in ECW. He never did anything without her and what about Raven Tommy, what about Raven? The difference is Dreamer needs her, but Raven wants her. Dreamer tells her to get out and loads up a piledriver but Raven makes the save with the DDT.

With Dreamer down, here are the Impact Players to pick the bones. Justin superkicks him down and they load up the spike tombstone but Masato Tanaka comes out for the save…..and to start a match?

Tag Titles: Masato Tanaka/Tommy Dreamer vs. Impact Players

And it’s a title match? Sure why not. The challengers clean house to start and they head into the crowd for the brawl. Storm throws Dreamer down some stairs and dives onto his body as Credible and Tanaka fight into the concourse. Dreamer and Storm head back inside with Lance getting crotched on the top rope so Dreamer can stand on his groin.

A baseball slide sends a chair into Storm’s face but Justin interferes, allowing Storm to superkick Dreamer down for two. Here’s the required table and Dreamer counters a suplex into the Death Valley Driver through the table. Everyone is inside again and Tanaka hits a quick Diamond Dust for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. Well that happened. Seriously, that’s about all I’ve got on this one. The match was literally thrown toge…..wait a minute. Tanaka was attacked by the Players on the ECW on TNN show, but he teamed up with Dreamer on TNN, which showed a flashback to him winning the titles on Hardcore TV? The Players had the titles when they attacked Tanaka, so we had a flashback to a match that took place before the events that set it up. This show is done in a few months and it’s pretty clear why.

Overall Rating: C-. Defying the laws of time and space, this was one of the better shows they’ve had in awhile. At least they had some decent matches on this episode instead of the mindless brawling we had to sit through last week. It’s still not a good show and we still have nothing concrete for the PPV, but there’s one full show left for them to turn it all around right?

 

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ECW on TNN – February 18, 2000: With The Only Meaningless Conchairto In History

ECW on TNN
Date: February 18, 2000
Location: Tallahassee Civic Center, Tallahassee, Florida
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

The main story coming out of last week’s show was Rhyno and Corino going after Dusty Rhodes with Sandman making the save. Odds are we won’t hear about that tonight due to it being the second half of a double taping, but the story wasn’t very good other than Dusty’s parts anyway. We also might get an update on the TV Title situation. Let’s get to it.

We open with Cyrus in the back, talking about how we only have 59:45 to go until ROLLERJAM! ECW is in trouble after Dusty Rhodes attacked him last week and they have heat with the network now. RVD is officially stripped of the TV Title and ECW will do what Cyrus says to do. NOW ONLY 57:19 UNTIL ROLLERJAM! I remember watching this when it first aired and it was awesome due to Cyrus being so over the top. Also Rollerjam was awesome.

Opening video.

Joey and Joel do their intro from the booth instead of the ring with Styles talking about the new video game, which was a clone of WWF Attitude.

Tanaka says he’s winning the title back tonight.

Nova/Chris Chetti vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring

Chetti takes Doring into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. A quick kick puts Danny down and it’s off to Nova for a double elbow and hip toss. Roadkill comes in sans tag to clean house but takes out Doring by mistake. Nova comes back with a kick to Roadie and a spinebuster to Doring before diving to the floor to take out Roadkill. Nice sequence there.

Back in and Roadie blocks a tornado DDT and Doring takes Nova down with a clothesline. This is pretty fast paced stuff but it’s not falling apart at all. A pair of slams (sidewalk and power style) put Nova down and a top rope elbow from Doring gets two. Nova comes back with a reverse DDT and it’s off to Roadie vs. Chetti.

Chris cleans house on both guys and hits a tornado DDT on the big fat guy (Roadkill). Nova and Chetti load up the Tidal Wave (top rope splash and legdrop from the same corner) but only Nova launches with Chetti getting crotched. Doring makes the save and Roadkill pops up to set up a table on the floor. The big fat splash misses Nova entirely, but Doring hits a jumping double arm DDT on Nova for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it falls into the same ECW trap that most matches do: there’s not enough time spent building to the frantic (yet good) finish. Both of these teams were good in the roles they played, but Nova and Chetti never won the titles and Roadkill and Doring only won the belts after the TV show was off the air.

Post match the Impact Players, the reigning tag champions, come out to destroy all four guys.

Mike Awesome says he’ll keep the title.

Super Crazy vs. C.W. Anderson

I never cared for C.W. Anderson. He’s supposed to be a throwback to Arn Anderson but it never quite worked. Crazy hooks a quick headscissors to put Anderson on the floor before hitting a BIG springboard moonsault to take out Anderson and Bilvis Wesley. Crazy picks up a chair for no apparent reason, allowing C.W. to superkick it into his face. It’s already table time but Anderson goes to the top rope after setting it up. Crazy is all like ESTOY EL LUCHADOR and hurricanranas Anderson down for two.

Not that it matters though as Anderson comes back with a spinebuster through the table. Arn Anderson should smack him around for that kind of no selling. A half nelson suplex gets another two count for C.W. but a springboard tornado DDT gets the same for Crazy. Super throws in two more tables and chairs for something resembling a Conchairto because why not use one of those in a meaningless TV match? A springboard legdrop through the table gets two for Crazy as Lou E. Dangerously makes the save. Bilvis accidentally hits Lou with a chair, allowing Crazy to hit two moonsaults through the table for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, this was a six and a half minute TV match with no story to it, so we had three tables, a Conchairto, two people interfering and chair shots. The reason stuff like this worked in the Austin vs. Foley main events was there was a solid foundation under the matches to get us to that point. Just having it all happen in a few minutes between guys with no story doesn’t work at all unless you’re some kind of bloody thirsty sociopath.

Chetti and Nova want a piece of the Impact Players. They didn’t need to wear a jock strap on the face or to carry Shawn Michaels’ bags (Justin) to get over.

ECW World Title: Masato Tanaka vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome is defending. The fans chant RVD at Awesome during the weapons check. You know, because we wouldn’t want weapons getting involved in an ECW match or anything. Awesome runs the challenger over to start and catches a Thesz Press attempt in a belly to belly suplex. Tanaka comes right back with a powerslam of his own, only to have Awesome run the corner and hit a back elbow to the jaw. Nice move.

Tanaka quickly knocks him to the floor and hits a plancha off the top rope to the floor. Mike goes into the barricade but gets a boot up to stop a charging challenger. A big dive over the barricade into the crowd takes Tanaka down as we hit the brawling stage. Mike hits a HARD chair shot to the head (what was that about weapons?) but Tanaka no sells it. A German suplex is no sold and a chokebomb gets two for Awesome.

It’s table time but Tanaka escapes an Awesome Bomb and sends Mike to the apron for a DDT, sending Awesome through the table. A running chair shot to the head has Awesome in trouble and a missile dropkick to the back of the head gets two. Tanaka hits the top rope chair shot to a grounded Awesome but Mike counters the tornado DDT into a kind of spinebuster on the chair.

The second attempt at the DDT connects but Awesome gets up at two. Diamond Dust (flipping Stunner off the middle rope) is countered into an Alabama Slam for two and Mike gets two off a sitout Awesome Bomb. The Awesome Splash gets the same and here’s another table. Tanaka escapes another Awesome Bomb and hits the Roaring Elbow, only to have Mike deck him on the top and hit a top rope Awesome Bomb through the table to retain.

Rating: C+. Yeah these matches are hard hitting and fun, but when you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all. There is NOTHING between the big moves and it takes away from any value the match has. It’s a car crash match with nothing but spots and that makes for a match that is fun for a bit but has zero staying power at all. There’s no story or anything here and that holds matches WAY back.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was fun in a car crash sense, but other than that there’s nothing on here worth seeing. One of ECW’s biggest problems is the complete lack of an upper midcard. There’s a tag team division, a middle of the card and a main event scene, but nothing between them. This becomes a problem because there’s nothing for the guys in between so you get a bunch of random matches from week to week. This was decent enough but it didn’t do much for me.

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ECW on TNN – September 10, 1999: Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

ECW on TNN
Date: September 10, 1999
Location: Lost Battalion Hall, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

Back with episode three as we keep getting closer to Anarchy Rulz. The Dudleys are officially gone so we move into a new era. Our main event tonight is RVD vs. Jerry Lynn for the TV Title which is considered the holy grail of feuds in ECW. The matches are good but I’ve never found them to be the masterpieces that people claim that they are. Anyway, let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of last week’s show where the titles changed hands.

Opening sequence.

House show ads during Rhyno’s entrance.

Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Before the ECWites start complaining, yes I know that’s the WWE spelling of it and that’s how I spell it. Get over it. Speed vs. power here. Crazy moves as fast as he can but his springboard moonsault press is caught in a powerslam for two. Rhyno is brand new here. He misses a charge and Crazy hits a springboard missile dropkick and a leg lariat of the same kind of two.

Gertner keeps trying to order Mexican food. Out to the floor and Rhyno is knocked into the crowd. HUGE Asai moonsault takes Rhyno out. Back in the ring and Rhyno starts up the power offense. Crazy comes back with a tornado DDT for two. Selling and being on offense for an extended period weren’t things commonly done in ECW. A moonsault gets knees and another powerslam gets two. Crazy counters a powerbomb into a rana for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match here with Crazy moving around quite well. The ECW midcard was usually very solid and this was one of their better periods. That being said, I eventually got tired of Tajiri vs. Crazy which happened for months on end. Decent little match here, although the ending was pretty weak. To be fair, Rhyno was brand new at this point so he didn’t have his whole deal down yet.

Post match Rhyno teases turning on his manager but destroys Crazy instead.

Since Tanaka and Awesome are challenging Taz for the title at the PPV, here’s their match from Heat Wave 98, which I’m copying and pasting. I’m not sure if the full version is shown on the TV show but this is the full review of if.

Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka

These two feuded for the better part of ever and Tanaka usually would win if you can believe that. Awesome was just a freak of nature to say the least. In a little known bit of trivia, Awesome is the step nephew of one Hulk Hogan. Awesome could do just about everything and jumped all over the ring like Rey Mysterio, but he was the size of Test or so. And there he goes with a huge dive over the top rope.

Tanaka gets a running start with a chair to nail Awesome in the freaking head. That looked painful. Basically all Tanaka can do is blast him with a chair. I’m not saying that’s all he’s capable of, but that that’s all he can get to work. A huge splash hits as this is rather physical. It’s not great but it’s far from bad as well. Tanaka takes a bunch of chair shots to the head but he Rises Up as the chair looks diseased.

The Awesome Bomb connects but Awesome wants to use a table instead. I hate those things. A chair shot from the top which should have killed Tanaka connects and still no cover. Tanaka escapes twice despite likely being legally dead and power bombs Awesome through the table.

I’ve officially lost this match now, as there comes a point where disbelief can’t be suspended anymore. The Roaring Elbow connects for the second time but only the first time that it was either noticed or that Awesome sold it. A tornado DDT on a chair ends it with Tanaka getting the pin.

Rating: C+. Well it was a good brawl but not much more. The amount of kickouts was just dumb near the end, as half of those bumps should have killed them. It certainly was exciting if nothing else though. The good thing is that the matches didn’t really get bad but they never really got better either. This was fun.

House show ads.

TV Title: Jerry Lynn vs. Rob Van Dam

Jerry doesn’t even get an entrance. Van Dam is champion and has been for the better part of ever, which is about accurate I believe. They slug it out to start and we get a pretty sweet gymnastics routine until a standoff. They both pose but as Rob does, Lynn kicks him to the floor. Lynn hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take Rob out and we take a break. Back with Lynn being thrown into the barricade but RVD misses the Van Daminator because Lynn comes up with the brilliant idea of throwing the chair back.

Rob hits a moonsault off the barricade to take Lynn out. Joel: “That piece of commentary brought to you by the master of the obvious.” THANK YOU! That’s what gets on my nerves about Styles: he spends so much time saying the moves we’re seeing. This isn’t radio. I know what a moonsault looks like. Back in and Van Dam drops a legdrop onto a chair onto Lynn’s face.

Van Dam comes in with his top rope kick to take Lynn down for a close two. Fonzie throws in a chair and Rob loads up Jerry for a superplex onto said chair but Jerry counters into a sunset bomb onto it for two. They do a pretty nice sequence with the chair with both guys trying to hit the other with it, ending with Van Dam dropkicking it into Lynn’s head. Van Dam’s monkey flip is countered and Jerry hits a Van Daminator of his own for two.

Lynn hits a tornado DDT onto the chair and both guys are down. A delayed cover gets two for Lynn and the chair is thrown to the side. Lynn loads up the cradle piledriver but RVD counters into a pretty good pinfall reversal sequence. That gets a standing ovation and they clothesline each other….and the Impact Players run in for the no contest.

Rating: B-. Good match here but the chair got a little annoying. That’s part of my problem with ECW in general: I get that it’s a hardcore based company, but I’d like to see some more wrestling before we get to something like that. Good match though, and it’s clear why they couldn’t give us an ending here, which is ok.

The Impact Players (Justin Credible/Lance Storm with Jason and the smoking hot Dawn Marie) say they’re more deserving to close the show than these two.

We get a highlight package of the Impact Players’ greatest hits.

Lynn vs. RVD is made again for next week and a winner is guaranteed.

House show ads end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Another pretty decent show here. The major perk of these shows is that they’re really short, running about 45 minutes and a good deal of that is taken up by house show ads and stuff that goes by really quickly. The show was entertaining enough though so I can see why people were fans of it. Decent show.

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