Lucha Underground – September 6, 2017: Donuts, Coffee and Medallions

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Date: September 6, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

We’re less than a month away from Ultima Lucha Tres and that means it’s time to start filling out the card. The big story this week is a street fight between Cortez Castro and Joey Ryan, who have been feuding for months now, partially due to the whole….I’m going to stop there because this company’s storylines are really complicated. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the tournament finals before moving on to the Worldwide Underground and the collection of the seven medallions. Above that though, Matanza is coming for Rey Mysterio, which can only end badly.

Aztec Medallion: Drago vs. The Mack

Drago wastes no time with a running dropkick and a tornado DDT, only to have Mack shove him away without much effort. Mack does a headstand in the corner, earning himself an enziguri. La majistral gets two and Mack is in some trouble. He’s fine enough to elbow Drago in the mask but Kobra Moon gets on the apron for a distraction. A quick Dragon’s Lair gives Drago the pin and the medallion at 3:46.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one as it didn’t have much time and the whole Drago/Moon thing has killed off a lot of interest I’ve had in both of them. Mack hasn’t done much since losing to Johnny Mundo and this is a pretty big loss for him. He doesn’t have anything as we head towards Ultima Lucha and hopefully he’s not stuck with these people.

Post match Mack Stuns Drago and gets beaten down by the rest of the Tribe.

Back from a break with Dario Cueto in the ring. Next week will be the 100th episode so we’ll be having some big matches. First up, we’ll have the Worldwide Underground vs. Prince Puma and a team to be announced later tonight. In the main event though, Rey Mysterio will face Matanza. Dario brings Rey out and tells him to leave the building before Matanza’s match tonight. If he doesn’t, Dario will fire Dragon Azteca Jr. That’s cool with Rey, who promises to destroy the Cueto legacy next week with Dario coming next.

Aztec Medallion: Cortez Castro vs. Joey Ryan

5-0 street fight, meaning there’s a bunch of police themed stuff around the arena. Dario runs to start so Castro follows him outside for some chops. A tornado DDT on the floor has Joey in trouble, because dropping someone head first onto concrete doesn’t knock them cold like it used to.

Back in and Joey gets in a slam and sets up a riot shield in the corner. Joey hammers on him with some handcuffs to bust open Castro’s head. Now it’s some nightstick shots to the back so Striker can make Big Boss Man jokes. With nothing else to do, Joey puts on a plastic glove and lubes up his hand to….yeah you can figure that one out for yourselves. That’s enough to fire Castro up (not the most shocking thing in the world) and he knocks Joey outside, sending him through some of the cops. Fans: “WE WANT DONUTS!”

Joey goes face first into the police cruiser but Castro misses a swing with a ball bat. Instead Joey grabs a sledgehammer (HHH jokes abound), only to hit the windshield by mistake. Castro gets dropped onto the hood of the car anyway but it’s time to go to the snack table.

That means hot coffee down Joey’s trunks and Castro tases him there for a bonus. Naturally Joey is right back with a superkick to drive a box of donuts into Castro’s face as Striker talks about an Aztec medallion. The balance from the commentary to the match isn’t exactly working. Back in and Castro maces him, followed by a running Samoan Driver onto the riot shields for the pin at 13:02.

Rating: C. I wanted to like this match and they were getting somewhere in the beginning with the blood and violence, but then they went flying off a cliff. I really don’t need to see Joey lubing up his hand, having hot coffee poured down his trunks and superkicking a box of donuts. Yeah it’s a police themed match, but you can either go with the theme or go with the story. Trying to do both turns it into a mess, which is what happened here.

Rabbit Tribe vs. Matanza

Matanza is offered a hat to start but dancing doesn’t work so well. Vampiro explains various drug cults as Matanza is sent outside for a dive from Saltador and a plancha from Mala Suerte. Back in and a series of dropkicks has Matanza reeling but they stop for some more dancing. Matanza actually dropkicks the trio down but Easter eggs to the head are good for a distraction. A pair of superkicks sets up London’s shooting star for two and that’s enough for Matanza. House is cleaned in a hurry and the Wrath of the Gods ends Saltador at 4:46.

Rating: D. Now this one missed a lot more than the previous match. I really like the Rabbit Tribe as they actually feel like chaos instead of what usually passes for such in a wrestling promotion. However, this was a lot of running around being goofy yet still having success against a monster like Matanza. The ending was the right call but dang I didn’t like how they got there.

Here’s Prince Puma to announce his team for next week. Before he can get to the announcement though, here’s Mundo to say he’s going to take Mundo to Slam Town at Ultima Lucha, just like he did on the first episode. Puma brings up beating him to become the first champion, which Mundo takes as confidence. If Puma is so confident, let’s make it title vs. mask. The deal is made but here’s Dario to interrupt. Since we already have a mask vs. mask match at Ultima Lucha (We do?), let’s make it title vs. career. Puma decks Mundo and holds up the title because it’s on.

Overall Rating: C. They’re firmly into the stretch to build up Ultima Lucha Tres though I’m not sure if they have enough time to set up four hours worth of matches in just two more shows. It’s cool to get to a milestone like the 100th episode but this season, which is now at A YEAR long really needs to wrap up. I’m still liking the show but it’s nothing I’m really looking forward to anymore, which is quite the shame given how much fun it used to be.

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Lucha Underground – January 11, 2017: Hasta Eventually

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Date: January 11, 2017
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

The opening recap looks at Dragon Azteca Jr. wanting to go after Matanza, Cortez Castro coming back to the Temple under a mask, Texano getting mad at Famous B. and Johnny Mundo picking All Night Long for his match with the Mack.

Texano vs. Joey Ryan

Texano shoves B. down and high fives fans as he leaves.

Cage vs. Veneno

That seems to be Castro under his mask. Veneno is wearing a spider style mask and Vampiro says the name means poison. A few kicks have Cage in trouble until a Screwdriver crushes Veneno for the pin at 1:23.

Cage leaves and Sexy Star comes out to yell at Veneno, likely due to the spider mask.

Matanza vs. Dragon Azteca Jr.

After the credits, Marty Martinez stalks Melissa Santos but Mariposa kidnaps him. She thinks he might be learning something but a slap to the face just makes him laugh.


Apparently this is a mid-season finale and the show will be back in the summer. That’s a very, very long time off and that’s not good.

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Lucha Underground – December 7, 2016: Bullfighting

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Date: December 7, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

The tournament will be called the Battle of the Bulls with four fatal fourways (one fall to a finish). The winners will advance to a fourway elimination match for the title shot.

Battle of the Bulls First Round: Cage vs. Texano vs. Joey Ryan vs. Dr. Wagner Jr.

Dario gives Sexy Star a match with PJ Black. If she wins, she gets her title rematch inside a cage. If she loses though, no more title shots ever.

Sexy Star vs. PJ Black

Kobra Moon tells her tribe that they must bring back the man who deserted them over a thousand years ago. She orders them to bring her the man who used to be a dragon.

Battle of the Bulls First Round: Marty Martinez vs. Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. The Mack vs. Mil Muertes

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Lucha Underground – November 30, 2016: Break Up The Tribe

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Date: November 30, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Pentagon Dark vs. Black Lotus/Black Lotus Tribe

Gauntlet match with Pentagon vs. all four in turn. First up is Doku, who walks to the ring with her arms folded for an odd look. Doku fires off some chops in the corner and a hard kick to the ribs, only to get dropkicked across the ring. Pentagon starts getting more serious so the kicks and chops get even harder. Well at least louder, with one sending Doku out to the floor.

A gorilla press toss sends Doku face first onto the apron and a sick kick to the thigh has her in even more trouble. Back in and Doku scores with a good looking spear followed by a top rope elbow. She tries it again though but Pentagon is waiting on her and breaks the arm for the win at 6:12.

Pentagon is sent into the chairs and hit in the head with a metal sign. Back in and Pentagon starts wrenching on the knee but Yurei comes back with a hurricanrana. A tornado DDT looks to set up something out of the corner, only to have her dive into the package piledriver. One more broken arm later and Yurei is done at 7:22 (13:34 total, not counting breaks between falls).

Before the third fall, Matanza is working out when Dario comes in. Next week Matanza will get his rematch for the title but the monster wants Mysterio.

The third entrant is Hitokiri, which translates to Assassin. A dropkick sends Pentagon outside and a big moonsault press has Pentagon in even more trouble. Hitokiri starts banging away with a chair and Pentagon is in trouble. Vampiro is getting turned on by the violence and Pentagon is thrown through some chairs. Again. Pentagon is slammed onto the exposed concrete and you can see his body being broken down.

Prince Puma wakes up in his coffin and Vampiro is waiting on him. Vampiro: “Come with me.”

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Lucha Underground – November 16, 2016 (Aztec Warfare III): Letting Them Fight

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Date: November 16, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Lucha Underground Title: Aztec Warfare

Matanza gets kicked out to the floor and the three others start fighting for some reason until Pentagon Dark (POP) is in at #5. Back from a break (such a rarity around here) with little having changed and Pentagon cleaning house. Matanza gets back in and knocks Pentagon to the floor, likely in a preview of a HUGE rematch down the line. PJ Black is in at #6 and gets two on Crane via a top rope Lionsault.

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Lucha Underground – November 2, 2016: It Worked Before

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Date: November 2, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Lucha Underground Title: Matanza vs. Cortez Castro

Dario calls Castro a rat in a rare instance of the backstage stuff being mentioned in front of the cameras.

Dario and Joey Ryan are laughing in the back when Son of Havoc comes in with Mascarita Sagrada. Mascarita wants to face Famous B. so Dario makes Havoc vs. Dr. Wagner Jr. If Havoc wins, Mascarita gets to pick the stipulations for the match with Famous B. If Wagner wins, he gets to pick.

Dr. Wagner Jr. vs. Son of Havoc

The White Rabbit Tribe is still coming.

Grave Consequences is confirmed for next week.

Rey Mysteiro Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Loser leaves the Temple and unfortunately that means we have to hear about how great and legendary Chavo is. Chavo headlocks Rey down to start as Dinero talks about how many times this match has taken place over the years. Not the best argument, but neither is having Chavo in a featured role.

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Lucha Underground – October 19, 2016: It’s A Big Deal Again

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Date: October 19, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Vampiro goes up to Puma for some advice but the Prince wants nothing to do with him.

Lucha Underground Title: Matanza vs. Killshot

The Rabbit Tribe is still coming.

Drago vs. Fenix vs. Aerostar

Mil Muertes vs. Prince Puma

Rey Mysterio is talking to Chavo Guerrero Sr. about his respect for Chavo Jr. Sr. respects Rey as well.

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Lucha Underground – October 5, 2016: Now That’s An Upgrade

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Date: October 5, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Ivelisse vs. Mariposa

Marty decks Ivelisse post match.

The White Rabbit Tribe is coming. Somehow I like this idea.

Texano vs. Cage

Lucha Underground Title: Prince Puma vs. Matanza

Killshot is lifting weights when Joey Ryan comes in with a note for him. Killshot asks who gave it to him. Ryan: “What do I look like? A detective?” The note says Killshot left someone for dead.

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Lucha Underground – September 21, 2016: Not Quiet Yet

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Date: September 21, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Matt Striker, Vampiro

Mysterio and Azteca are working out with Mysterio saying to forget Pentagon because they have their own battle to fight. Chavo Guerrero comes in and grabs a leg lock on Azteca but Rey quickly chases him off.

Lucha Underground Title: Matanza vs. The Mack

Mack is challenging and, somehow knowing he would be getting the shot, runs in through the crowd to go after Matanza in the aisle. A Stunner on the floor gives Mack three straight near falls, followed by a hurricanrana for good measure. Matanza shrugs it off and grabs a release German suplex. A pumphandle throw makes it worse and Cueto wants to see Mack dropped on his neck. Mack sends him outside for a flip dive but his frog splash hits knees. Wrath of the Gods retains the title at 6:03.

Cage vs. Texano

Dario comes out of his office to say that the winner of this will get the ULTIMATE OPPORTUNITY. They go to the mat to start until Cage sends him over the ropes, only to get Stunned across the top. Texano gets kicked to the floor and taken down by a big man flip dive which always looks cool. Back in and Cage grabs a reverse Boston crab of all things but his rolling Germans are countered into an ankle lock. They trade some small packages for two each, followed by Cage hitting a Death Valley Driver for two more. A big old discus lariat takes Texano down and gives Cage the pin at 6:02.

Dario says not so fast as that was the first match in a Best of Five series. And before you ask, this was taped before Cesaro vs. Sheamus started.

Trios Titles: Aerostar/Fenix/Drago vs. Worldwide Underground

Aerostar and company are defending. Drago and Evans start things off with Jack having issues removing his warmup gear. Black tags himself in but Taya does the same so we can finally get contact. They trade technical stuff to start with Taya flipping out of a waistlock for a standoff.

Black misses his top rope Lionsault and Taya has to throw Evans in by the hair. The champs start speeding things up and whip each other into Black in the corner as Evans is sitting on the floor with his arms folded. Black tries a springboard but Aerostar springboards up into a hurricanrana of his own. I know it looked bad with Black clearly just being there so he could get taken down but still, cool spot. A springboard Codebreaker puts Black away at 9:23.

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Lucha Underground – September 7, 2016 (Season 3 Premiere): Picking Up Where We Left Off

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Date: September 7, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Lucha Underground Title: Son of Havoc vs. Matanza

Gift of the Gods Title: Taya vs. Sexy Star

Star gets beaten down until Fenix, Drago and Aerostar make the save. You can almost guarantee an eight person tag.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Pentagon Dark

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