Summerslam Count-Up – 2008 (2013 Redo): The Main Event Fight Isn’t The Main Event

Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We run down the card because you might have ordered the show blind or something?

MVP vs. Jeff Hardy

MVP makes the ropes and the referee has to keep pulling Jeff out of the corner. Jeff eventually gets free and charges right into a snap belly to belly for two. MVP kicks him in the back and puts on something like a crucifix hold before rolling over into a camel clutch. Off to something like a side leg bar but MVP eventually lets it go. Jeff goes tot he apron but MVP knocks him out of the air to break up a springboard, getting two.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy

Jeff Hardy comes out to make the save and the Hardys suplex Henry.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Punk was basically a glorified midcarder at this point but his time would come. JBL shoves Punk into the corner to start and a hard shoulder puts the champion down. Punk comes back with a flying forearm to send him to the outside and a suicide dive fires the fans up even more. Back in and a high cross body gets a one count for Punk but another shoulder block puts him down. Punk tries to go up, only to be taken down by a middle rope fall away slam for two.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

Rating: C+. This match, while slow, was a great example of psychology in a wrestling match. HHH knew that there was only one move he could use to hurt Khali and give him a chance for the win so it was the only thing he tried for most of the match. This was HHH working around someone and it worked quite well as HHH is a very talented wrestler, which unfortunately is often forgotten.

John Cena vs. Batista

Back up immediately and Cena throws Batista to the floor in something resembling an FU before collapsing down. Back in again and Cena fires off the shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb to set up the Shuffle. The FU is countered again and Batista kicks him in the face to put both guys down. Batista drives shoulders into the corner and catches him in the spinebuster to put Cena down. Cena backdrops out of the Batista Bomb and hits a DDT on the leg to set up the STFU. Batista FINALLY crawls over and gets a rope to shock Cena.

The Cell is lowered.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Taker counters the spear into a chokeslam for a close two and Taker is getting frustrated. The Last Ride is countered by a low blow and an Impaler gets two. Back up and Taker loads up the Last Ride again but wants it through the tables on the floor. Edge slips over the top and hits the spear for a very close two. Now the Last Ride connects but Edge gets out at two.

Rating: A. THIS is how you blow off a feud. Edge was completely destroyed at the end here with Undertaker hitting every big move he had and Edge not kicking out of them at all. These two had some great action all year long and the Cell is the best way to blow the whole thing off. Having it as a TLC match inside the Cell was fine and it made for a great main event.

Taker leaves but Edge very slowly gets up. The big man goes back inside and sets up the ladder before lifting Edge onto it. Taker throws in another ladder and climbs up next to Edge so he can throw the Canadian down through the mat. He raises his arms up and lights the hole on fire to end the show in a corny moment.

Ratings Comparison

MVP vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: B

Redo: B-

Kofi Kingston/Mickie James vs. Glamarella

Original: D

Redo: D+

Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Great Khali vs. HHH

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Batista vs. John Cena

Original: A

Redo: A-

Edge vs. Undertaker

Original: A-

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: A-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/11/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2008-punk-as-champion-thatll-never-happen-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2007 (2022 Redo): We Need Super Cena

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

This is a bit of a weird show as it is built around the two World Title matches, but two of the other big matches involve people who have been gone for months. We’ll be seeing Randy Orton challenging John Cena for the Raw World Title while Great Khali defends the Smackdown World Title against Batista. At the same time, Rey Mysterio and HHH are back after some long layoffs, making the build for this a bit weird. Let’s get to it.

The opening video narrates a look at Mysterio returning and the regular World Title matches, making it feel like a TV show.

Then we get the REAL opening, with the “We Can Rebuild Him” video on the returning HHH, the actual star of the show.

Kane vs. Finlay

Grudge match after Finlay accidentally knocked a cup of coffee Kane. Worked for Jericho in 2000. Kane, with his injured ribs, knocks Finlay into the corner to start and grabs a slam to keep him in early trouble. Some uppercuts in the corner set up some choking on the ropes before Kane knocks him over the top. That’s not enough for Kane, who boots him in the face, only to get hit in the ribs.

Back in and a backsplash gives Finlay two and it’s off to a half crab. Kane fights up again and it’s an enziguri to put Finlay down for a change. A one armed side slam gives Kane two and there’s the top rope clothesline to rock Finlay again. Finlay is right back with a shot to the ring but it’s Hornswoggle time.

You don’t do that to Kane, who shoves Hornswoggle down but can’t chokeslam Finlay due to the bad ribs. JBL: “He has won a WWE Championship with that chokeslam.” No, he hasn’t. Finlay unhooks the turnbuckle pad, which is enough for him to sneak in the Shillelagh (with an assist from Hornswoggle) shot to the ribs for two. That’s too much for Kane, who sends him into the post and grabs the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was about taking two hard hitting guys and letting them beat on each other for a little while. That’s how you start a show and it worked well enough, as they both know how to do this match really well. Not a classic opener or anything close, but it was fun to watch two guys like this do their thing.

Vince McMahon and Coach joins the General Managers in a party themed move. McMahon thinks the mother of his illegitimate son wants a payday but here is Santino Marella to suggest he is said son. That’s rejected, so here is MVP to say he wants to issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy for something other than a match. Vince is down for that, but William Regal thinks Vince’s son would be more, uh, regal. Everyone else leaves and Vince seems disturbed by the thought of being with an Englishwoman.

Video on Rey Mysterio. Did you know he’s back tonight?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

Umaga is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. They stare at each other to start and Umaga punches both of them in the face before sending them into various corners. Carlito and Kennedy need a breather on the floor and decide to go for a distraction, which goes horribly wrong as well. Kennedy saves Carlito from the running hip attack in the corner though and it’s a running boot to drive Umaga’s head into the steps. That leaves Kennedy to stomp on Carlito inside but he’s right back with a springboard elbow.

They seem to be going as fast as they can because Umaga is up, meaning it’s an uppercut from the floor to drop Carlito. Kennedy saves him from a Stinger Splash in the corner though and a shot to Umaga’s head gets two. Umaga isn’t about to get double suplexed so he suplexes both of them at the same time instead. The monster awakens and wrecks both of them, including the running hip attack in the corner to Carlito. Kennedy knocks Umaga outside…but Umaga is right back in with the Samoan Spike to finish Kennedy to retain.

Rating: C. It was little more than a Raw match and that didn’t exactly leave us with a great showcase. The good thing is that Umaga looked like a monster out there as Kennedy and Carlito combined completely failed to stop him. That’s the kind of win that will build Umaga back up even more and that is going to make the person who finally stops him look even bigger, as it should.

Undertaker is back at Unforgiven.

We recap Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Chavo put Rey on the shelf for knee surgery and is now laughing at the idea that Rey is coming back. Revenge seems imminent.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Rey’s torso is covered in silver paint because he can be a bit odd with some of his costume ideas. They talk trash to each other to start until Rey hits him in the face. Chavo goes after the knee but Rey slips away without much effort. The test of strength is on, allowing them to flip around a lot with neither getting very far.

Another try for the knee works better for Chavo as the leg is wrapped around the middle rope. Rey isn’t having that and kicks Chavo outside before taking him back in for some knee work of his own. There’s a middle rope hurricanrana to send Chavo flying again but he catches Rey in the Tree of Woe to go after the knee again. Said knee is wrapped around the post as we get to the meat of things. The stretch muffler has Rey in more trouble and there’s a dropkick to the knee.

The knee is fine enough to hit an enziguri but it gives out on the 619 attempt. Rey has to get to the ropes to get out of a half crab and now it’s Chavo’s turn to be in the Tree of Woe. That doesn’t last long either so Rey sends him outside for a running seated senton off the apron. Rey misses a high crossbody back inside though and it’s a Gory Bomb to give Chavo two. Another 619 attempt misses and Chavo hits a few Amigos. Rey isn’t having that though and it’s the 619 into the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: B-. As expected, this was a good match between two talented wrestlers, though I’m still not sure how much interest there was going to be in Chavo as a focal point. He’s a very good worker, but he is more a solid hand than a featured player. That being said, this was all about Rey being back and getting to shake the rust off, which worked well in his first match in a long time.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell say Rey Mysterio’s return may have been great, but HHH’s return will be an entrance, followed by him bowing down to King Booker.

Battle Royal

Maria, Beth Phoenix, Melina, Jillian Hall, Mickie James, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Kristal, Michelle McCool, Layla, Kelly Kelly, Brooke

The winner gets a future Women’s Title shot against Candice Michelle, who is at ringside. It’s a brawl to start, as it should be, with a bunch of brawling around the ring. Jillian gets rid of Maria and Layla is gone soon after. Brooke seems to have been tossed somewhere in there too and Kristal gets rid of Victoria (that’s an upset).

Michelle knocks Kristal out and there goes Kelly (through the ropes, because over the top is a bit too much). Torrie helps get rid of Jillian and Melina knocks out Mickie. We’re down to Michelle, Melina, Beth and Torrie, with Melina being knocked out by Michelle. Beth gets rid of Torrie without much effort and we’re down to two. Michelle tries a kick and is tossed out to give Beth the win.

Rating: D. What else did you expect here? There are only a few women who are ready to challenge for the title and Beth is about as good of a choice as you could have here. Beth is a different kind of monster and we should be in for a showdown with Candice. At least they kept this moving, as that is the best idea they could have had here.

Almost immediately as soon as the match is over, here is MVP, with a few guys carrying a cooler, to say no one paid to see these women. You need him on the show, so MVP talks about how he used to drink beer. His tastes have changed now that he is rich, but tonight it’s time for a beer drinking contest with Matt Hardy.

Hold on though, as Matt brings up MVP using a surrogate for their boxing match. Well Matt (who somehow knew this would be a drinking contest) has his own surrogate: Steve Austin. Cue Austin, who warms up for the contest with some rope running and pushups but it’s a Stunner before the first beer is consumed. A lot of drinking ensues. Nothing wrong with a surprise appearance like this, even if Austin didn’t say a word.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

Vince McMahon is still in the office with the bosses when Cryme Tyme interrupts. They think “Vinnie Mac” (Vince: “Vinnie Mac?”) might be their dad and it’s time to chant MONEY MONEY YEAH YEAH. Everyone dances around Vince, including William Regal in a hat. Cue Ron Simmons for the catchphrase.

Video on John Morrison.

ECW World Title: John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Morrison is defending and gets taken down without much trouble to start. Punk wins a grapple off to start and hits a hiptoss before hitting a triangle dropkick to the floor. Back up and Morrison hits a neckbreaker onto the apron, allowing him to hammer away with some right hands.

We hit the chinlock with an arm trap, which Tazz doesn’t seem to notice as a version of the Tazmission. A regular chinlock doesn’t work either and Punk is back up with a middle rope crossbody for two of his own. The scoop powerslam gets two more but it’s a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to give Morrison two more. Back up and Punk crotches Morrison on the top and they’re both down for a bit. Punk’s top rope hurricanrana is countered though and Morrison puts his feet on the ropes for the stolen pin to retain.

Rating: C. These two have had more than a few matches now and it wasn’t exactly anything better than their previous stuff. Punk has lost to Morrison time after time now and there isn’t much left for these two to do with each other. The other problem is that there isn’t anything else for Punk on ECW, but he has to win something soon. Not a bad match, but it could have been on ECW TV.

King Booker vs. HHH

This is HHH’s first match since January after another torn quadricep. Booker, with Queen Sharmell, thinks there is only one king around here. Naturally HHH gets a big special entrance video, including the WE CAN REBUILD HIM deal. Commentary tries to put it over like the 2002 MSG return and it’s just not there.

Booker slugs away to start but gets punched outside without much trouble. Back in and HHH gets cut off with an elbow to the head, only to get knocked right back to the floor. HHH gets to punch him in the face a bit more, setting up the facebuster for two back inside. Booker gets smart by going after the leg, only to have HHH take out Booker’s leg instead.

The Figure Four goes on so Sharmell rakes the eyes for a save. The slugout goes to HHH, and he tosses Booker outside for a whip into the steps. They head back inside for the spinebuster but Booker breaks up the Pedigree attempt. Some knees to the head set up a side slam but Booker misses the Houston Hangover. The Pedigree finishes Booker without much effort.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t a disaster but it was far from as good as you would have expected from these two. HHH shrugged off everything Booker threw at him and then won clean in the end, which isn’t exactly surprising. I would have expected a bit more than about eight minutes, but odds are they didn’t want to leave HHH out there to get winded early. This could have been worse, though it was pretty lame, all things considered.

We recap Batista vs. Great Khali for the Smackdown World Title. Khali is the new unstoppable monster and Batista is one of the only people who can come after him. That’s a bit of a problem though, as Khali’s Claw/vice grip are rather deadly.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista is challenging and gets pounded down in the corner to start. Khali sends him outside in a heap and hits the big chop on the way back in. That’s only good for two so Khali sends him shoulder first into the post, setting up the nerve hold. The rope is grabbed, meaning it’s a forearm to the back and another nerve hold goes on.

Cole describes the reaction as the fans getting restless, which is certainly one way to go. Batista fights up and blocks the vice grip, setting up the spinebuster. For some reason Batista goes up but dives into the double chokeslam for two. Runjin Singh throws in a chair and Khali hits Batista for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Restless would be one way to go, but the better term would likely be “bored out of their minds”. This was a bunch of sitting around doing nothing until Khali did something pretty stupid and now we are likely in for a rematch, because that is what we needed here. I get the idea of the chase, but the idea of Khali being involved in anything fast paced is disturbing.

Post match Batista gets the chair and blasts Khali for a change. JBL is livid at Khali for doing something so stupid, which is a fair assessment.

It’s back to the office, where Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young come in to see Vince. They don’t think they’re the mother of the son, but Mae wants some relations with Vince RIGHT NOW to make a new son. Mae jumps him and leaves a taste in Vince’s mouth…which he kind of likes. Coach: “That’s disgusting sir!” Vince: “Old chicken makes good soup.”

We recap John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title. Cena has been champion for almost a year but Orton has been on a path of destruction. Now it’s time for Cena to stop him, because no one else can do it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and gets headlocked to start, with the fans really not being behind Cena. The headlock (and really blatant spot calling) continue until Orton reverses into one of his own. Cena can’t counter into the STFU and Orton stomps him down. Back up and Orton keeps it simple with a hard shot to the head which might cause Cena to miss a crossbody.

That means Orton can knock Cena off the apron and onto the announcers’ table for two back inside. The rather aggressive chinlock goes on but Cena suplexes his way to freedom. A missed charge lets Orton get in some more stomps but he misses the big knee. The powerslam doesn’t miss though and we’re right back to the chinlock. Cena tries to power up again so Orton grabs a sleeper with a bodyscissors.

More power gets Cena out of trouble, this time by driving Orton into the corner. Now the comeback is on, including the Shuffle, but the FU is countered into the backbreaker. There’s the hanging DDT as JR is wondering when the concussion is coming. The RKO is countered but Cena misses another charge and falls over the top. Back in and Cena tries the Throwback but winds up with a Blockbuster, which is quite the odd visual coming from him.

The top rope Fameasser connects and Orton is in trouble again. This time the FU is countered with a neck snap across the top. That’s enough to load up the Punt but Orton takes too long and gets pulled into the STFU. The rope gets Orton out of trouble and he grabs a quick RKO for two (that’s still a rare kickout). Cena is done playing around though and hits the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This was a big time fight and Cena felt like he went through a long battle. They were trading big moves but the ending was a bit of a letdown, as Cena kicked out of the RKO and then finished him clean. That doesn’t leave much of a future for the feud, but never let it be said that WWE won’t let something continue despite it looking like it was wrapping up. What we got was good though, as these two were starting to feel it when they went home.

Overall Rating: C. The main event helps a lot and there was enough good to make it work, but Batista vs. Khali was horrible and HHH’s return was a disappointment. It was a bunch of short matches too, with only Orton vs. Cena and Mysterio vs. Guerrero breaking ten minutes. At least we got some good stuff in there though, including a solid main event. Good, but certainly not great show.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2005 (2020 Redo):

Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2004 (2019 Redo): The Young One

Summerslam 2004
Date: August 15, 2004
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,640
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the second biggest show of the year and that could go multiple ways. Smackdown has been getting better as of late but it’s still not very good. Raw has had its moments, but with the second biggest match from the red show being HHH vs. Eugene, they’re working underneath a pretty low ceiling. Let’s get to it.

The theme is the Summer Games, giving us an Olympic themed opening. I’ve always liked these as they’re actually rather entertaining.

The opening video looks at the big matches, but Diva Dodgeball is in the middle, even before the Intercontinental Title and Smackdown World Title matches. I’m thinking no on that one.

Dudley Boys vs. Paul London/Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio

Spike recently joined his brothers and since there are no other teams on Smackdown, Kidman and London are still feuding with the Dudleys. Rey just walks out to his music, which takes a lot of the impact away. D-Von hammers on Kidman to start but gets armdragged down for his efforts. London comes in for an assisted moonsault and the dropkick gets two.

A rather hard clothesline takes London down and it’s off to Spike for some screaming stomps in the corner. Bubba comes in for the trash talking elbow drop and the villains start taking turns working on London. Straight right hands break up the comeback attempt but Bubba hits D-Von by mistake. Spike gets kicked away and that’s enough for the tag off to Mysterio.

The springboard legdrop gets two on Spike and a hurricanrana out of the corner makes things even worse. A reverse DDT plants D-Von and it’s back to Kidman for a top rope back elbow to Spike. Everything breaks down and a BK Bomb gets two on Spike. Bubba gets double dropkicked to the floor and Spike takes a Hart Attack of all things. The 619 sends Spike into the shooting star from Billy for two with D-Von making the save. Back in and Kidman walks into the 3D to give Spike the pin.

Rating: C. Well that was a dumb ending. You have Spike as Cruiserweight Champion and have him pin a Tag Team Champion to open one of the biggest shows of the year? You couldn’t have Rey pin D-Von here to let the fans feel good? This didn’t help anything other than building Spike up, which was done as well as it was going to be with the Cruiserweight Title win. Bad decision here, in a match that didn’t need to have this kind of a finish.

We recap Kane vs. Matt Hardy. Lita slept with Kane to get him to leave Matt alone, actually being stupid enough to believe it would work. As a result Lita is pregnant but still loves Matt. Therefore, she’s marrying the winner of this match. Somehow, not even the most bizarre stipulation in Summerslam history.

Kane vs. Matt Hardy

Matt goes straight at him to start and hits what I guess was a middle rope Side Effect for two. The middle rope legdrop to the back of the head gets the same and a weird looking tornado DDT (with Matt landing on his stomach) gets the third two. Kane finally hits a clothesline to take over but a Lita distraction lets Matt low bridge him to the floor.

The slingshot dive sets up a Twist of Fate for nine and probably the best chance Matt had. Lita throws in the bell and distracts the very stupid referee so Matt can clock Kane for two. Kane kicks him in the face and goes up but gets caught by Matt. That’s fine with Kane, who hits a super chokeslam for the pin and Lita’s hand.

Rating: D. Short and bad here, with Matt having less than no chance throughout. Matt has been destroyed and turned into an idiot this whole feud and Kane winning in the end was the only way it could go. Now just get to the wedding, which is destined to be the most entertaining part of this whole thing. The match was nothing that couldn’t have been done on Raw but with a nice looking ending. That’s also Matt’s last WWE match for about a year as he had a bad knee injury and was then released in April.

Randy Orton doesn’t want to hear about anyone being upset because tonight is a night for celebration. John Cena cuts him off and promises him some merch. He’s an Orton fan, but a quick fan poll seems to suggest that they don’t agree with him. And so it begins.

Booker T. vs. John Cena

Match #1 in a best of five series for Booker’s US Title. They slug it out to start with Cena hitting a clothesline for one. Cena gets in the Throwback for two so Booker crotches him on top to cut that off in a hurry. Booker throws in a You Can’t See Me and drops a knee for no cover. A jumping kick to the face cuts off Cena’s early comeback and it’s a camel clutch to keep things slow.

That’s broken up so Booker goes with a spinebuster and side slam to drop Cena again. The ax kick misses though and Cena hits his running clothesline out of the corner. That just earns him a flapjack into a Spinarooni but Cena hits a quick FU for the pin, ignoring Booker’s shoulder being way off the mat.

Rating: D+. That’s the third straight fast match here and that’s not a good thing on a show like this. They didn’t even have seven minutes here, which is the kind of match that could have been on Smackdown instead of wasting it on this show. Cena is likely losing the next two matches to put him in a hole which is fine, but I could have gone for a better start to this thing.

Eric Bischoff (“the head cracker in charge of Raw”) comes in to see Theodore Long and points out the revolving door to the Smackdown GM office. Bischoff advises him to enjoy it while it lasts but Teddy tells him to get to steppin.

Intercontinental Title: Batista vs. Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Hometown boy Edge is defending and Batista is on fire at the moment. Speaking of Batista, he knocks Edge off the apron during his entrance and we hit the Y2J chants early on. A hard elbow knocks Jericho down and a shoulder does it again. Edge comes back in with a chop block to break up the Batista Bomb though and it’s time for some Canadian violence on Batista. Snake Eyes gets Batista out of trouble but Jericho grabs his boot to slow him down a bit.

A clothesline puts Batista outside and leaves Edge alone in the ring….where he’s booed out of the building. Well that’s rather surprising. Batista gets sent face first into the steps and we’re down to Jericho vs. Edge in the ring. Edge gets the better of the fight but gets loudly booed when loading up the Edgecution. The Walls attempt gets a much better reaction, though Edge reversing into a small package isn’t as well received. Back up and Jericho pokes him in the eye, setting up the full Walls of Jericho.

The hold is pulled back into the middle until Batista finally makes a save with the clothesline. Edge takes Batista down with an Edgecution for two as Jericho is banged up on the floor. The spear is loaded up but for some reason Jericho cuts Edge down on the way to Batista. A spinebuster gives Batista two on Jericho but this time it’s Edge sending the big man outside. That gives us another battle of the Canadians and another loud Y2J chant. Batista gets dropkicked off the apron but the distraction lets Edge spear Jericho down to retain.

Rating: D+. The odd crowd reactions threw things off here, though they’re not quite as out there as you might think when you remember Edge teasing a heel turn as of late. Now that being said, you would think the hometown deal would be enough to overcome the recent cheating but that wasn’t the case here. On top of that, the match didn’t have a ton of heat and was a string of one on one matches instead of all three at once. Edge retaining is fine, though Batista is getting bigger and bigger every week.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle in a Wrestlemania rematch. Eddie cheated (kind of) to win at Wrestlemania in Angle’s last match for about five months. Angle is back now, though while he was on the shelf he cost Eddie the WWE Championship so Eddie is out for revenge and to prove that he can hang with Angle on an even playing field. This has been the best set up feud for the whole show and the match should be able to live up to the hype.

Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Angle has Luther Reigns with him. Feeling out process to start as the odd fans are cheering for Angle here. Shockingly enough Angle is more than fine against Eddie on the mat so Eddie tries for the ankle. He’ll settle for a headlock instead so Angle reverses into a quick keylock. Eddie armdrags him straight into an armbar but it’s time to start the rolling German suplexes. That doesn’t work either as Eddie reverses the second into the ankle lock as the wrestling lesson continues. Angle reverses into the real thing but Eddie puts his own on at the same time. It doesn’t last long, though cool idea there.

A rope finally saves Eddie so Reigns gets in a cheap shot like a good lackey should do. That means another ankle lock before Angle finally switches gears a bit for something close to an STF. With Eddie down, Angle starts untying Eddie’s boot but the delay lets Eddie get in a kick to the face. It’s right back to Eddie’s ankle until Eddie gets in an Angle Slam of his own. Eddie makes his comeback with right hands but the ankle isn’t exactly sturdy.

It’s fine enough for the Three Amigos so Eddie goes up for the frog splash, only to get caught with the running belly to belly superplex. Angle’s Angle Slam is countered into a DDT and another frog splash attempt misses. The Angle Slam gets two so Angle rips the boot off to set up the ankle lock again.

The roll through sends Angle into the referee so Eddie hits Angle and Reigns with the boot. Of course Eddie throws the boot away and falls down instead of hitting a frog splash, which would have made more sense. Eddie hits the frog splash for two a few seconds later and yells at the referee on the kickout. That’s enough for Angle to pick the ankle and put on the grapevine to make Eddie tap.

Rating: C+. What exactly are they saving all the time for on this show? That’s the first match to break thirteen minutes and nothing else has even hit nine. There are three matches left on the card and nearly an hour and a half left in the show, but nothing has even hit fifteen minutes yet. Did Diva Dodgeball need the extra time?

Anyway, this wasn’t all that great as the first few minutes were looking like the start of a thirty minute classic but then they just jumped the stolen finishers (which is becoming a rather tired trope) and had Angle break the ankle down for the win. This was dying for another eight minutes of build towards the finish but for some reason this show has to go as fast as it can because of reasons.

We recap HHH vs. Eugene. HHH found out that Eugene was his favorite wrestler and agreed to use him to help get the World Title if HHH could eventually make Eugene want to quit. In other words, it was a story that was way more complicated than it needed to be and Eugene, who started off as a very fun, unique character has turned into the clueless putz that cost HHH the title. Therefore, HHH must destroy him to prove that he’s better than a mentally disabled person who doesn’t know how to wrestle but imitates wrestling he watched on TV as a kid. In the second biggest Raw match on Summerslam. Of course.

HHH vs. Eugene

No one is at ringside for a bit of a surprise. HHH wins an early slugout but Eugene elbows him in the face so it’s time head outside. That means a chance for HHH to hide behind Lilian Garcia, allowing him to take over again. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Eugene blocks a suplex to the floor. Some right hands in the corner set up a Flair Flop and HHH has a bad knee. Believe it or not, it’s a way for HHH to sucker Eugene in again and outsmart him for a cheap shot.

A backbreaker keeps Eugene in trouble as JR freaks out of the fake injury. He certainly must have loathed Bret Hart then. The fans think Eugene sucks so his comeback isn’t exactly well received. HHH offers a handshake but this time Eugene is ready for him and pulls it into a Rock Bottom. The People’s Elbow is countered with the spinebuster to a face pop as the trip into the bizarre continues. HHH chokes away and it’s back to the floor for a whip into the steps.

Back in and HHH slowly beats on him, setting up the sleeper because this match needed a sleeper. Eugene escapes and hits a backdrop, followed by a middle finger and the Stunner. That’s enough to send HHH outside for a breather though and here’s Ric Flair because HHH is actually in trouble. The big boot into the legdrop connects but Flair gets knocked off the apron. Eugene goes up top and dives into the Pedigree but spins out, setting up a Pedigree on HHH instead. Flair puts his foot on the rope so it’s just a two, earning an ejection. Cue William Regal to knock Flair cold with the brass knuckles as the Pedigree finishes Eugene.

Rating: D. Well thank goodness for that. After a few months of getting frustrated, the great and mighty HHH came back and beat the comedy act in a match at one of the biggest show of the year. All it cost Eugene was all of the good will he built up too, but at least HHH got the big win. This whole story was really stupid and a huge waste of time, which really doesn’t work when it boils down to HHH needing almost fifteen minutes to beat a comedy guy. It was just bad all around and didn’t help anyone other than HHH, who didn’t get that much out of it anyway.

And then, Diva Dodgeball with the Diva Search girls basically in swimsuits while the Raw women are in matching gear. Before the game starts, Coach tells us about some trash talk that happened after Raw went off the air. They proceed to play dodgeball, which is in no way shape or form an excuse to have good looking women in barely existing clothing running around. The Diva Search girls dominate and win. Trish yells about the refereeing and then blames Victoria, triggering a fight. This took up nearly six minutes, which is about seven minutes too long.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Undertaker

No recap for this one because the build hasn’t exactly been thrilling. JBL won the title earlier in the summer and needed an opponent so Undertaker showed up. For some reason JBL decided he wasn’t afraid of Undertaker and brought out a mini version, who Undertaker wound up beating up instead. Then JBL brought in Orlando Jordan as his Chief of Staff because he needed a designated lackey.

Undertaker knocks him to the floor early on and the beating begins, including JBL’s arm going into the steps. Back in and JBL hits a quick swinging neckbreaker before going up top for a good looking top rope shoulder. An armbar doesn’t get JBL anywhere so Undertaker pulls on the arm as well and hits Old School. Undertaker grabs an ugly triangle choke until Jordan pulls the foot under the rope.

With that not working, Undertaker hits a big boot to JBL but misses a running version in the corner to let JBL take out the knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and a Jordan distraction lets JBL smash the leg with a chair. Undertaker gets sent into the barricade so Jordan can get in a few shots before sending him inside. The fans start the Wave as the leg work continues.

The leglock goes on as JBL is smart enough to just throw on a hold and let the fans die down. It’s not exactly thrilling for the fans at home but it’s a smart idea here. Undertaker fights out and pulls JBL down into a quickly broken kneebar. They head outside again with Undertaker hitting the apron legdrop. The announcers start chanting for the Spanish table but JBL snaps the throat across the top for a breather. Again JBL takes too long going up though and it’s a superplex for two.

Jordan throws the belt in for a shot to the head and the very delayed near fall with Jordan grabbing the hand to slap the mat. Undertaker finally beats up Jordan but eats another Clothesline From JBL. With the referee still down, JBL rains down right hands in the corner which is only done to set up the Last Ride. Jordan is back in with the belt so Undertaker takes it away and hits JBL for the DQ.

Rating: D. The thing is, it’s not even the worst match in the world. It felt like it was straight out of the HHH/Ric Flair Greatest Hits playbook with Jordan being the worst Flair impersonator of all time. The leg work was fine and JBL still wasn’t horrible yet, but the ending was pretty lame with Jordan being pathetic and JBL’s finisher not being able to do much damage. It’s not so much horrible or even bad as much as it is uninteresting and uninspired, which made for a very long seventeen minutes.

Post match the beatdown continues with the bloody JBL being chokeslammed through the roof of the limo. JBL does a stretcher job, guaranteeing a rematch. Of note: at some point during the match, a fan tried to climb onto the limo and security kept him from not only, you know, climbing onto the limo but also breaking the roof and injuring himself/ruining the spot.

Cole shows us a replay and tells us to listen. There’s no sound.

Raw World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging after winning a battle royal and pinning Benoit in a tag match. Here’s your exchange that would never happen today: Lawler: “Hey JR you got a camera on you?” JR, dripping with sarcasm: “Yeah right here in my pocket.” The fans are all over Earl Hebner with the YOU SCREWED BRET chants as they stare each other down at the bell. Benoit drives him into the corner and takes Orton down for a rather early chinlock. A test of strength goes to Orton but he misses a knee drop.

Benoit is right back with the armbar and armdrags him down into another armbar. That’s reversed as well with Orton grabbing a Sharpshooter of his own. Benoit slips out of that and tries a Crossface, sending Orton to the floor where he posts Benoit to really take over. A second posting keeps the champ down and Orton drapes him over the top rope for good measure.

Something like a DDT on the apron gets Benoit out of trouble but he misses a dive through the ropes, sending himself HARD into the barricade. Back in and Orton hits the over the shoulder neckbreaker for two, followed by the chinlock. Benoit fights up for stereo crossbodies but gets up first for a northern lights suplex. A release German suplex has Orton in more trouble and the Sharpshooter goes on.

That’s good for two arm drops until Orton makes the rope so they’re both exhausted. Some rolling German suplexes put Orton down again but he gets his feet up to block the Swan Dive (FREAKING OW MAN!). The cover is countered into a Crossface but Orton rolls out. Back up and Benoit tries it again but Orton spins him around into the RKO for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. It’s not a masterpiece but it was a good, long, well put together match with a completely clean ending that made Orton look like the better man. The new heel on top is long overdue and it’s nice to see Orton, who has gotten a lot better in a hurry, win the title here. Benoit’s title reign was very respectable and he beat HHH a few times, which is about as good as you’re going to get. It’s a rather good main event, though not exactly a classic.

Post match Benoit gets back in and shakes his hand, demanding that Orton be a man. Orton shakes his hand and Benoit leaves in peace, allowing Orton to pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is two different halves and it’s as noticeable as you’re ever going to see. The first four matches are all short and need more time while the remaining four, as in the big matches, either fail to live up to the hype or just aren’t very good in the first place. This show needed to be reshuffled a bit with some extra time being given to a few other matches. Stuff like Diva Dodgeball and the opener could have been cut to give the time to other matches. It would have done the show a lot of good, but there was only so much this show could do.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Dynamite – July 6, 2022: The 6th of July

Dynamite
Date: July 6, 2022
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Taz, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur

We’re back to the normal show this week and that could mean more than a few things. In this case it means that we are going to be seeing Jon Moxley defend the Interim World Title against Brody King, which should be a heck of a fight. Other than that, it is time to build towards Ring Of Honor’s Death Before Dishonor later this month. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

TNT Title: Wardlow vs. Scorpio Sky

Wardlow is challenging in a street fight. Sky strikes away at the leg to start and gets dropped with a hard shoulder. A low blow cuts off Wardlow but he’s fine enough to toss Sky around a few times. They head outside where an American Top Team distraction lets Sky send Wardlow into the steps.

We take a break and come back with Wardlow knocking him off the top and hitting a Swanton. The Powerbomb Symphony is loaded up but Wardlow clears them out without much effort. The distraction lets Sky get in a belt shot for two and Wardlow is back with the spinebuster. A three movement Powerbomb Symphony gives Wardlow the pin and the title at 8:29.

Rating: C. Not exactly a great match and I’m not sure on the idea of having Sky lose again here, but Wardlow needed to win something already and they pulled that off here. Wardlow shrugged off whatever was thrown at him here and he won the title like a monster should. Good enough match and it did what it needed to do.

Confetti falls and Wardlow gets to celebrate.

Jon Moxley is tired of people trying to make their name off of him and tonight, Brody King is going to do it again. You don’t know what kind of a monster you have with him but Moxley knows what he is facing tonight in King.

Here are Christian Cage and Luchasaurus for a chat. Christian has been asked what is going on for a few weeks now and why Luchasaurus has sided with him. Before he can say anything, here is Matt Hardy to interrupt. Matt says he and Jungle Boy have gotten close in recent weeks and Jungle Boy didn’t deserve what Christian did to him.

Christian: “Matt, you’re starting to make your brother sound like the sober one.” Matt talks about regretting the time he spent manipulating people and maybe the last month has been karma coming to get him. Christian calls Matt out for being delusional and for riding Jeff’s coattails for one more run. The brawl is on with Luchasaurus leaving Matt laying, including a chokeslam through the ringside table. I could have gone without the Jeff references but this was fine enough.

Video on Blood & Guts from last week. The Jericho Appreciation Society promises it is not over.

Jake Hager yells at Claudio Castagnoli for never being a World Champion. Castagnoli talks about respect and promises to earn it next week.

Butcher and the Blade vs. Swerve Strickland/Keith Lee

Bunny is here with the villains. Lee headbutts Butcher down to start so we’ll try Strickland vs. Blade instead. That doesn’t go so well for Strickland to start but he knocks Blade down and hands it back to Lee for a shot of his own. Blade jawbreaks his way to freedom but gets knocked outside. Bunny offers a distraction to cut off the dive though and Butcher gets in a cheap shot to take over as we take a break.

Back with Lee getting to clean house as everything breaks down. A lariat/enziguri combination drops Butcher but Blade pulls Swerve in the way of Lee. Butcher hits Lee with a Stunner and Butcher runs him over, allowing Butcher to toss Lee into Blade’s knee. A running knee gets a VERY close two on Swerve with Lee making a (maybe late) save. Back up and Swerve In Our Glory finishes Blade at 9:38.

Rating: C+. I’m not wild on the continued tease of Swerve and Lee breaking up, especially when they haven’t been around long in the first place, but at least they won the match in the end. Butcher and Blade almost feel like a relic from the past but they are still good enough as a team to make a match like this work. Just either split Swerve and Lee or let them stay together and stop with the teases if it isn’t happening.

Post match Team Taz comes out to yell at Swerve and Lee, with Ricky Starks losing his mind over what sounds like a challenge. Cue the Young Bucks to cut them off, though they don’t have to apologize for anything because they started this company. The Bucks brag about the tag division, including what we saw at Double Or Nothing, which was 4.5 stars. Granted that’s an off night for the Bucks, but they need to keep things going. The solution to that: a triple threat match next week at Fyter Fest. Fans: “FTR!” Nick: “We’re better than them and you know it.” The match seems to be on.

Malakai Black says his House’s violence is by design and Jon Moxley doesn’t know what he is in for.

Here is Eddie Kingston for a chat. He congratulates Wardlow on winning the title and everyone who won Blood & Guts last week. The only person he doesn’t like is Chris Jericho, who made him a liar last week. Kingston didn’t get to taste his blood…but Jericho cuts him off on the screen. Jericho asks if Kingston wants to get nuts and we see the Jericho Appreciation Society slamming Ruby Soho’s hand in a car (granted it wasn’t in the car and they more or less had to tell her to get it slammed in the door, making it look really bad).

Here is the Dark Order, complete with -1, to say that they aren’t going anywhere. They’re here to stay because Dark Order is forever but here is QT Marshall to interrupt. Marshall doesn’t think much of the team and -1 in particular, so threats are made. Cue Hangman Page to send Marshall into the ring and the big beatdown is on. -1 teases beating Marshall but says he’ll wait until he’s 18. This could have, and probably should have, been a post show segment.

Rush vs. Penta Obscuro

Andrade, Jose, Fenix and Alex Abrahantes are here too. They go right at it to start with Rush getting the better of things by running Obscuro over. The fight heads to the floor, where the Alex Abrahantes and Jose get in a fight of their own and we take a break. Back with Rush hitting a powerslam for two but Penta grabs a Backstabber for the same.

They slug it out until Rush knocks him into the corner and hits a top rope dropkick for two. Penta is back up with a kick to the face and the Fear Factor gets two, with Andrade putting Rush’s foot on the rope. The distraction lets Rush get in a low blow and rip off Penta’s mask (of course) for the pin at 11:04.

Rating: C+. Good brawl here, though I am completely over that rip off the mask ending. It has been done so many times with both of the Lucha Bros that it feels like something they have to do instead of something special. These two can work the hard hitting style well and they did here, though Rush is still only so interesting.

Jay Lethal and company are happy with the upcoming ROH TV Title shot at Death Before Dishonor. Lethal isn’t taking Joe lightly, but he is taking Joe’s title. Good line.

Mark Sterling is trying to get the Best Friends to sign a petition to get rid of Swerve Strickland. Orange Cassidy wants his lawyer present and that’s….Danhausen? Sterling wants Tony Nese vs. Cassidy on Rampage so they can make a lot of money. but Cassidy isn’t sure. Danhausen to Cassidy: “How about you vs. his client on Rampage? We’ll make a lot of money.” Cassidy is in. Funny stuff, especially Danhausen shouting various legal terms and no one paying attention to him.

Ruffin It/Fuego del Sol vs. Gunn Club/Acclaimed

The Club cuts off Caster’s rap and tensions are high. Fuego takes Colten down to start but it’s Bear Bronson coming in for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Caster hits the Mic Drop, but Austin tags himself in and steals the pin at 2:14. This story is oddly growing on me.

Post match the Club and Acclaimed get into it but Billy Gunn comes in the ring…and turns on the Acclaimed, leaving both of them laying. So there’s the Acclaimed’s face turn.

Miro is not happy with Malakai Black.

Thunder Rosa/Toni Storm vs. Marina Shafir/Nyla Rose

Rosa takes Shafir into the corner to start and it’s a double suplex for two. A hip attack keeps Shafir in trouble as the dominance is on to start. Rose gets in a cheap shot though and a fireman’s carry slam drops Storm as we take a break. Back with Storm fighting out of the corner and handing it back to Rosa to clean house. The running dropkick against the ropes staggers Rosa but she’s back up with a Rock Bottom. Everything breaks down and the hip attack hits Shafir, setting up a spike fire thunder driver to pin Shafir at 9:07.

Rating: C. Calling Rosa and Storm Thunderstorm is a funny way to go, though at first I thought it was AEW’s latest gimmick match. Anyway, this is a fine way to set up what should be Rosa vs. Storm for the title down the line, though the less Shafir we see on TV the better. It isn’t working with her, but she’s here pretty frequently anyway for whatever reason.

Stokely Hathaway recommends Leila Grey as the newest Baddie. Jade Cargill says he better be right.

Daniel Garcia is ready to take the Ring Of Honor Pure Title from Wheeler Yuta at Death Before Dishonor.

FTR wants the Briscoes at Death Before Dishonor, one more time.

Interim AEW World Title: Jon Moxley vs. Brody King

King is challenging and William Regal is on commentary. They shove each other around to start and get in each others’ faces to yell a lot. King knocks him outside and sends Moxley into various things to take over. Back in and Moxley gets in a few shots to the knee to take over but gets dropped again as we take a break.

Back with King missing a Cannonball in the corner so Moxley puts him on top and rakes the back for some pain. King blasts him with a clothesline and hits a piledriver for two before grabbing the sleeper in the corner. With that broken up due to being in the ropes, Moxley grabs a Paradigm Shift. The hammer and anvil elbows keep King in trouble, setting up the bulldog choke to finish him off (ala how Moxley beat Brodie Lee) at 11:14.

Rating: B-. They had a good fight here, even though it was Moxley defending against Moxley’s Designated Victim #1. There was no reason to believe that King was going to take the title here, but in this case that worked out well. Moxley gets a win over someone who looks impressive and King doesn’t lose anything from a loss to the champ. Completely logical choices.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t their strongest effort as everything seemed a bit off. Maybe it was a post-holiday hangover or something but it just didn’t quite click. They have some time before All Out and you can probably guess the top of the card from here, but focusing on it would be nice. Certainly not a bad show, but Dynamite has a pretty high bar and this was beneath their usual.

Results
Wardlow b. Scorpio Sky – Powerbomb Symphony
Keith Lee/Swerve Strickland b. Butcher and Blade – Swerve In Our Glory to Blade
Rush b. Penta Obscuro – Small package
Gunn Club/Acclaimed b. Fuego del Sol/Ruffin It – Mic Drop to Bear Bronson
Thunder Rosa/Toni Storm b. Marina Shafir/Nyla Rose – Spike fire thunder driver to Shafir
Jon Moxley b. Brody King – Bulldog choke

 

 

 

 

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Dynamite – June 1, 2022: The Latest One

Dynamite
Date: June 1, 2022
Location: Kia Forum, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Excalibur, Tony Schiavone, Jim Ross

We’re done with Double Or Nothing and for once that means that we are going to be building towards another show. This time it’s Forbidden Door, which is going to includes a bunch of special matches between AEW and New Japan. Odds are that includes new World Champion CM Punk so let’s get to it.

Here is Double Or Nothing if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

CM Punk/FTR vs. Gunn Club/Max Caster

Caster’s rap promises to make FTR pay like Amber Heard and that FTR is only here because of Punk’s coattails. Then the Club gets the city wrong twice before Bowens gets to do it right. Harwood takes Austin into the corner to start and hands it off to Wheeler. Austin powers him into another corner so Colton can come in, only to get backdropped. Punk comes in and drops a top rope ax handle onto the arm, much to the fans’ delight.

Caster manages to send him into the corner but Harwood is right back with a powerslam. A double elbow gives Austin two on Harwood though and Billy Gunn adds a right hand for the same. Harwood fights over for the tag but Punk and Wheeler get pulled off the apron in a good heel move.

The double flapjack gets two on Harwood and we take a break. Back with Austin trying a Sharpshooter (giving us a hilarious closeup of Punk’s eyes bugging out) but Harwood fights out and brings in Punk to clean house (after slipping on the springboard clothesline). Wheeler gets dropped over the top onto Caster and Colten, leaving Punk to top a top rope elbow on Austin. Billy’s distraction doesn’t work as Punk powerbombs Austin into him. The GTS into the Big Rig finishes Austin at 11:45.

Rating: B-. I don’t remember Punk and FTR teaming together before but I’m not at all surprised that they work well together. They seem to have a similar philosophy about wrestling and that is going to make for some good matches. At the same time, very nice work from the Gunn Club and Caster, who were put in a pretty high level spot and held their own throughout.

Post match Punk says he doesn’t do drugs but this must be what it feels like. After all of those miles, he still has a lot to learn. He has made mistakes but those are learning moments. Now all you can do is call him the champ. Dax Harwood talks about what all of this means to him, because being Ring Of Honor Tag Team Champion is very important. You don’t come out here and attack his best friend, even if you’re from another company. Punk talks about New Japan Pro Wrestling and wants to know who he has at Forbidden Door. Cue Hiroshi Tanahashi and I think we have a main event.

Here is MJF for a chat. Actually make that Max Friedman, who says there are some executives here and the boss wouldn’t want anything bad to happen. The boss has been wanting to sit down with MJF for a long time now but it’s too little too late. When this company started, it was all friends wrestling but he is out there expected to hit grand slam after grand slam. He has to be perfect though, because he is the 26 year old prodigy.

MJF hears clapping and booing, which he finds interesting because they were the same people calling him unprofessional over the weekend. There are people in the back who want his spot and they can have it because he doesn’t want to be here anymore. The fans are the problem because they are a bunch of internet marks.

MJF isn’t going to pretend to watch New Japan or chase star ratings and drop people on their head. He is that great because he makes you feel but people take him for granted. It isn’t just them, but the big man in the back too. Do you know who the second biggest minute for minute draw is?

It’s him, and you can ask Stat Boy Tony about it. Just don’t ask Tony to reach into his pockets to pay him, because he needs to give all his money to every ex-WWE guy he can find. MJF: “Hey boss? Would you treat me better if I was an ex-WWE guy?” The only position Khan should have is behind the guardrail so MJF wants Khan to fire him. After yelling at a director to not count him down, MJF swears a lot and throws the mic down. So there’s your worked shoot, and only MJF could have pulled it off this well.

Johnny Elite vs. ???

It’s an open challenge as answered by….Miro, who says he is healed and ready to destroy everyone on earth and in Heaven. Miro stomps him down into the corner and the beating is on, including a Saito suplex. We take a break and come back with Miro hitting a release Rock Bottom but Elite manages a kick to the head. The standing shooting star press gives Johnny two but Miro is back up with a jumping kick to the face. Game Over finishes Elite at 6:04. Not enough shown due to the break, but this was just a step above a squash.

Video on Anarchy In The Arena.

Here is the Jericho Appreciation Society for a chat. The team brags about everything they did and Chris Jericho lists off the things that happened to him. This includes Eddie Kingston trying to LIGHT HIM ON FIRE and Bryan Danielson wanted to kick his expletive head in. Cue Eddie Kingston to say he wants to fight all of them, but he has William Regal here to say how the match should go. Regal: “BLOOD AND GUTS!” Not quite the same ring to it.

Kingston comes to the ring but gets beaten down, allowing Ortiz to come in from behind and hit Jericho with the Madball. Ortiz cranks it up even more by CUTTING JERICHO’S HAIR, sending Jericho into a rant. Jericho agrees to Blood and Guts, but first Jericho wants a match with Ortiz, hair vs. hair. Ortiz is in, meaning we now have a hair vs. hair match to set up Blood and Guts, which is a rematch from Anarchy in the Arena, which is the spiritual successor to Stadium Stampede.

In the back, Jay Lethal, Sonjay Dutt and Satnam Singh jump Samoa Joe and injure his arm. This is different than when Jay Lethal, Sonjay Dutt and Satnam Singh jumped Samoa Joe and injured his arm in the ring.

Matt Hardy/Darby Allin/Jurassic Express/Christian Cage vs. Young Bucks/ReDRagon/Hikuleo

Adam Cole is on commentary and Jeff Hardy is here too. Fish gets beaten down to start as everyone gets to take a few shots at him. This includes Matt’s middle rope elbow to the head but Fish kicks Matt away. Everything breaks down and the dives are aplenty, but the Bucks superkick Christian and we take a break.

Back with Luchasaurus getting the hot tag and cleaning house, including the standing moonsault for two. Hikuleo comes in for the exchange of throat grabs with Luchasaurus. A double clothesline puts both of them down and it’s a double tag to O’Reilly and Allin. Everything breaks down again and Allin’s dive is pulled out of the air by Hikuleo, setting up Chasing the Dragon on the floor. Matt cleans house and sends people into the buckle ten times each, leaving Christian to spear Hikuleo off the apron. The Bucks clean house with superkicks and the Meltzer Driver finishes Jungle Boy at 11:50.

Rating: C. Another wild ten man tag here, which is similar enough to something we get on almost any AEW show. The ending would suggest that the Bucks are getting back into the title picture, which might not be a thrilling prospect, but it would be nice to get the titles on one of the biggest teams in AEW. The Express is good, but they’re overshadowed by a lot of other teams around here.

Swerve Strickland introduces some people, who have something to do with music and Black Panther. A fashion icon gives him a jacket and Keith Lee wants titles.

Here is Athena for a chat. She wants to break Jade Cargill’s winning streak so here are Cargill and Stokely Hathaway. The staredown and shouting is on, with the Baddies, Anna Jay and Chris Statlander coming out to join in.

JD Drake vs. Wardlow

Wardlow, now with music, hits some shoulders and a two movement Powerbomb Symphony for the pin at 1:04.

Post match Tony Schiavone comes to the ring to talk to Wardlow….but here is Mark Sterling, who sends a lone security guard to the ring (Wardlow: “This guy doesn’t watch the product.”). It’s a lawsuit over Wardlow attacking various security guards and Sterling will see him in court. Wardlow powerbombs the guard and stuffs the papers in his mouth. At least that’s a bit more original.

The Men of the Year are ready to take out Dante Martin on Rampage. Martin comes in to say he’s better than Scorpio Sky and he’ll prove it on Rampage.

Britt Baker/Jamie Hayter vs. Ruby Soho/Toni Storm

Storm has to be held back from Baker to start so Baker heads outside to kiss her Owen Hart belt. Back in and Baker gets beaten down, allowing the tag off to Soho. That doesn’t go well for Soho, who is taken outside as we take a break. Back with Soho managing a Saito suplex on Baker, allowing the hot tag to Storm.

Everything breaks down but it’s Hayter hitting a hanging DDT to drop Storm on the floor. Soho hits a high crossbody to take Hayter down on the floor but Hayter hits an Irish Curse to drop Soho back inside. No Future connects for Soho but Baker tries to pull her into Lockjaw. That’s broken up but Hayter reverses the reversal, meaning Soho has to fight out of it again. A fisherman’s neckbreaker drops Soho but she is back with a knee to the face. Destination Unknown gives Soho the pin on Baker at 9:37.

Rating: C+. Soho gets a bit of her momentum back by beating Baker but it isn’t going to matter until she does it in a big one on one match. I still like Soho, but she has fallen pretty far since her debut. We could be heading for a showdown between the two of them, even though we just did that three days ago. Storm continues to just kind of be there, and I don’t know where she is supposed to go.

Post match Hayter hits Soho with the belt so Baker can stand tall.

Jon Moxley vs. Daniel Garcia

William Regal and Chris Jericho are on commentary. Moxley knocks him into the corner to start but Garcia is back with some chops. Those just annoy Moxley, who takes him down for some kicks to the back. Moxley was busted open somewhere in there and Garcia sends him outside to block the Paradigm Shift. A whip into the steps lets Garcia crush the ankle against the post and we take a break.

Back with Moxley hitting a toss suplex onto the steps for a SCARY landing, as Garcia landed back first on the edge of the steps. Thankfully he can get back in so Moxley can hit a butterfly superplex. The hammer and anvil elbows are countered into the same thing from Garcia, who hits a heck of a piledriver for two. Garcia’s Sharpshooter is countered into a bulldog choke but they head outside, with Moxley dropping him onto the table. Cue Chris Jericho to run to the ring but Eddie Kingston (who stumbles down there) pulls him down. The bulldog choke finishes Garcia at 11:28.

Rating: B+. Scary landing on the steps aside, this turned into a heck of a match after the break as they turned up the energy by about a thousand. Moxley looked like he was in trouble more than once but was able to hang on and win. Awesome stuff here as there were a few minutes that had me completely hooked.

Post match Moxley says Blood and Guts is on.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a heck of a show as they had things happening throughout. The biggest part is the energy that it had throughout, which isn’t something that has been around as much lately. AEW needed a Dynamite like this one and this certainly delivered with one of their best in awhile. Check out the second half of the main event, plus the MJF promo that is going to have people talking for a bit.

Results
CM Punk/FTR b. Max Caster/Gunn Club – Big Rig to Austin
Miro b. Johnny Elite – Game Over
Young Bucks/ReDRagon/Hikuleo b. Matt Hardy/Jurassic Express/Darby Allin/Christian Cage – Meltzer Driver to Jungle Boy
Wardlow b. JD Drake – Powerbomb Symphony
Ruby Soho/Toni Storm b. Britt Baker/Jamie Hayter – Destination Unknown to Baker
Jon Moxley b. Daniel Garcia – Bulldog choke

 

 

 

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Dynamite – May 18, 2022: Their Weird Trend Continues

Dynamite
Date: May 18, 2022
Location: Fertitta Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Excalibur, Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

It’s Wild Card Wednesday, meaning we find out the two Joker entrants in the Owen Hart Foundation tournaments. Other than that, we have two Dynamites left before Double Or Nothing and that means it is time to start hammering out a few more matches on the card. Most of the show is already set though and that can make things all the more interesting. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Owen Hart Foundation Tournament First Round: Samoa Joe vs. ???

Non-title and the joker is….Johnny Elite (Nitro/Morrison/about eight other names). Feeling out process to start as Joe doesn’t seem overly impressed. Joe knocks him into the corner for some shots to the ribs, followed by an elbow to the face. Some shots to the face have Joe in a bit of trouble though and Elite knocks him to the floor, setting up the big twisting cannonball to take Joe down again.

We take a break and come back with Joe hitting a big boot and then chopping Elite down. The MuscleBuster is loaded up but Elite takes him down and goes up top. The 450 connects (with Elite’s knees hitting a good bit short) for two but Joe is right back with the MuscleBuster for the pin at 10:21.

Rating: C+. Yeah fine. Elite is about as perfect of a choice as you could get to have him come in, be a nice enough surprise, and be fed to Joe without ruining a debut. I don’t need Elite to stick around, but he had a pretty nice start to his time in AEW, even if this is it. Joe is likely making a deep run in this thing and him winning the whole tournament wouldn’t shock me.

Post match Jay Lethal, Sonjay Dutt and Satnam Singh come in to take Joe out with a pipe. The Best Friends make the save.

We look back at Jeff Hardy getting banged up last week against Darby Allin (egads).

The Young Bucks come up to see the Hardys, with Jeff being cleared to wrestle tonight. The Bucks have been praying for him all week but Jeff wants that “Christian AF BS” out of here. Jeff has a tournament to win and Matt threatens violence if the Bucks interfere. Matt calling the Bucks Hardys cosplayers was funny.

Hangman Page vs. Konosuke Takeshita

Non-title and CM Punk is on commentary. Page starts fast and knocks him to the floor but Takeshita is back in with some strikes of his own. They head to the apron with Page taking him down again as we take a break. Back with Takeshita hitting a Blue Thunder Bomb and a jumping knee for two each. They clothesline each other down but Page is back up with a release German suplex, setting up a Tombstone for two.

The buckshot lariat is countered into a jumping knee and a stalling German suplex plants Page again. They go up top with Takeshita hitting a heck of a forearm to knock Page to the mat. Page pops right up with a discus lariat and the Buckshot lariat….but doesn’t cover. Instead it’s the GTS (Punk: “I’ve got him right where I want him.”) for the pin at 12:12.

Rating: B-. I’ve liked Takeshita more than I would have expected as DDT Pro doesn’t have the best reputation for being serious. Takeshita has a good look and his work has gone well enough so I could go for more of him going forward. That being said, this was an extended workout for Page and that’s all it needed to be.

Fuego del Sol and the Dark Order are ready for the House of Black.

Swerve Strickland/Keith Lee vs. Workhorsemen

Lee gets the better of a chop off with Drake to start and hands it off to Strickland. A jumping kick to the face rocks Henry in the corner and it’s back to Lee to clean house. Lee loads up a sitout powerbomb and Strickland adds a top rope double stomp for the pin at 2:21. Nice use of the new power/speed team here.

Post match Lee says they are a top five team but here is Team Taz to interrupt. Ricky Starks calls Lee Rex from Toy Story but Strickland says Starks looks like a bar of soap with a pearl necklace on. Cue Jurassic Express with Christian Cage to interrupt. Christian says they are the best and the triple threat challenge is thrown out for Double Or Nothing. Deal. Oh and for a bonus: let’s do Jungle Boy vs. Ricky Starks vs. Swerve Strickland next week.

Red Velvet and Kris Statlander are ready to fight in the first round of the Owen Hart Tournament on Friday. Jade Cargill comes in for catchphrases/trash talk.

Here are MJF and Shawn Spears, with MJF nearly getting sick when saying he’s in Houston. He tells Wardlow to get out here right now so here is Wardlow, with his hands still cuffed. MJF spits in his face and slaps him but Wardlow maintains his composure. MJF gets in a few whips but Wardlow doesn’t flinch. Spears gets in a few whips of his own and those wake him up, but MJF gets in a low blow and unloads with the belt. The Dynamite Diamond ring knocks Wardlow cold and MJF is rather pleased with himself.

Roppongi Vice throws out the challenge to FTR for a Ring of Honor Tag Team Title shot.

Owen Hart Foundation Tournament First Round: Kyle O’Reilly vs. Rey Fenix

Fenix starts with the flips but loses a chop off to put him right back down. Back up and an armbar slows Fenix down but he knocks O’Reilly to the floor for a heck of a running flip dive. O’Reilly posts the arm though and we take a break. Back with Fenix kicking him down as O’Relly’s chest is very red. O’Reilly grabs the rolling butterfly suplexes but Fenix drives him into the corner for a springboard spinning kick to the head.

Another spinning kick rocks O’Reilly but he bounces off the ropes with a rebound lariat. O’Reilly is back with a choke, which is reversed for a jumping enziguri. Fenix isn’t done and knocks him to the floor for a rope walk flip dive. Back in and a rolling cutter is countered into a cross armbreaker for the tap at 11:16.

Rating: B. This was an interesting back and forth style, with O’Reilly being perfectly logical by going after the arm that was hurt not too long ago. O’Reilly is going to go after a limb no matter what and they gave him an extra target here. Joe vs. O’Reilly should be a good showdown next week and they have done a nice job getting us there, especially with Fenix getting in just enough flips etc. to not take it too far.

Here is the Blackpool Combat Club/Eddie Kingston/Santana/Ortiz, as William Regal and Chris Jericho have their face to face chat (as Jericho tends to do). The Jericho Appreciation Society comes out, with the order to cut off the pyro and music. Jericho brings up the attack last week and says he thought Regal would be dead by now. Regal gets a chuckle out of that and talks about how Regal should have been one of the best of all time given all of his skills. Instead, he wound up being a world class addict.

Regal has been fired from every company he has ever worked for until he weaseled his way in here on the coattails of his proteges. Then you have Eddie Kingston, whose face was burned with a fireball. Then you have Bryan Danielson, and we pause for a YES chant. Danielson has never had a drink or taken a drug in his life, but stick with this gang long enough and Regal will have him needing the program just like Moxley. Jericho tells Regal to get out of the business or the Wizard will shoot a fireball in his face. Or relieve himself in Regal’s tea again.

The tea gets Regal talking, as the two of them have known each other since 1997. The only thing that are worse than Jericho’s voice are the screams from a burning orphanage so please be quiet. Jericho is right about Regal’s issues, but one thing has kept him going for the last 21 years. Whenever he has been on a show with Jericho, Regal would go to Jericho’s bag when Jericho was in the ring and….place Jericho’s toothbrush in a certain area. Daniel Garcia: “HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO SOMEONE???” Regal: “Actually flower, I did it to yours last week.”

Jericho loads up the Stadium Stampede challenge but Moxley says he “isn’t doing that s***.” Moxley isn’t doing that sports entertainment stuff so let’s make it anything goes with glorious violence until the Society is bleeding like stuck pigs. Call it whatever you want, including wrestling vs. sports entertainment.

Jericho seems down with that and brings up the other team’s history with each other, including Danielson calling Kingston “a judgmental prick.” Kingston to Danielson: “You are.” Kingston doesn’t care about buyrates or ratings though so let’s fight right now. Jericho and company leave instead, with Danielson and Kingston being ready to fight over giving chase. There were some great lines in there, but this wasn’t what I had in mind for Regal vs. Jericho: Face To Face, especially as Regal didn’t exactly get in any great lines in response to Jericho’s stuff.

Dante Martin and Matt Sydal want the Blackpool Combat Club on Friday.

Owen Hart Foundation Tournament First Round: Britt Baker vs. ???

The Joker is Maki Itoh, the singing wrestler who teamed with Baker last year at Revolution. Baker loads up the Fingerpoke of Doom but Itoh small packages her for two instead. Itoh steps on her foot and hits a headbutt, only to miss a falling headbutt. There’s a Sling Blade to Baker and we take a break.

Back with Baker sending Itoh face first into the buckle, but Itoh has a hard head so she does it to herself. A headbutt puts Baker down and Itoh adds a tornado DDT for two. Itoh finally hits her falling headbutt for two but Baker pulls her straight into the Lockjaw for the win at 6:45.

Rating: D+. The match itself was nothing and that isn’t the point here. Itoh is the definition of a gimmick and therefore having her pop up once every now and then is going to work. I don’t know how much anyone was wanting a payoff to Itoh and Baker teaming together at Revolution, but for something that lasted about eight minutes, there are far worse ways to go.

Post match Toni Storm comes out for the staredown with Baker, who doesn’t seem impressed.

Here is Tony Schiavone in the ring to hype up next week’s three year anniversary show but Serena Deeb cuts him off. She is sick of hearing Tony talk, especially last week when Tony said that she can’t beat Thunder Rosa. Dustin Rhodes has had a lot to say about Deeb having no chance against Rosa, so here is Dustin to interrupt.

Deeb calls him the poster boy of failure and says Jim Ross might be the only one with any brains around here. She says Dustin knows how hard it was to be a woman in her era and even got implants to satisfy old perverts. So why does Dustin think Deeb can’t beat Thunder Rosa? Dustin has nothing to say so she slaps him in the face, which draws out Rosa. Deeb takes the Women’s Title from her and gets in a good shot. I have no idea what they were going for here, but Deeb talking isn’t a good thing.

Owen Hart Tournament Semifinals: Adam Cole vs. Jeff Hardy

Cole jumps him in the aisle and the beating starts fast. Hardy is sent into the steps, setting up a Backstabber to drop Jeff again. We take a break and come back with the slugout in the middle (because of course) but Cole enziguris him down. The sitout gordbuster gives Jeff two but the Whisper in the Wind is…kind of superkicked out of the air (that didn’t look great). The Boom misses so Jeff hits the Twisting Stunner, only to miss the Swanton. Cole hits the Boom for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: C. This felt like a rush job due to time constraints, especially with Cole jumping him in the aisle. I can kind of get the idea of not wanting Allin to lose to Cole here, but if that is the case, don’t set up the brackets that way in the first place. Hardy was still banged up here so he has an out, but it wasn’t like there was much to the match in the first place.

Post match Cole stares at Jeff but Matt Hardy gets in to cut him off. The Young Bucks come in for the cheap shot but the Hardys stare them down. Cole jumps the Hardys and here are Sting and Darby Allin for the save. Cue ReDRagon to go after Sting and Allin though, including Sting’s ankle being Pillmanized to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. AEW continues their weird streak of a good show with that one weird thing in there. This time it was Deeb’s segment, as I’m not sure I get what they were trying to do. Other than that (and the Baker vs. Itoh match, which was meant to be glorified comedy), there wasn’t much to complain about here. Double Or Nothing had matches either added or enhanced so I can’t complain all that much. Not a home run show here, but it did what it needed to do and didn’t go nuts with the surprises. I had fun, so call it at least mostly a success.

Results
Samoa Joe b. Johnny Elite – MuscleBuster
Hangman Page b. Konosuke Takeshita – GTS
Swerve Strickland/Keith Lee b. Workhorsemen – Sitout powerbomb/top rope double stomp to Henry
Kyle O’Reilly b. Rey Fenix – Cross armbreaker
Britt Baker b. Maki Itoh – Lockjaw
Adam Cole b. Jeff Hardy – Boom

 

 

 

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Smackdown – November 16, 2007: That’s More Like It

Smackdown
Date: November 16, 2007
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and that means it is time for Undertaker and Batista to stare at each other because their title match in the Cell has been set for a few weeks now. Other than that, we don’t have much, but I could go for more of Jamie Noble, who has been a gem in recent weeks. I’m not sure how they fill two hours with that but let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a video on Batista vs. Undertaker inside the Cell. That’s about as big as it gets on this show.

Opening sequence.

Jeff Hardy vs. Finlay

Non-title and commentary explains that the GM’s have agreed that the Brand Split is out the window for this week. Finlay takes him into the corner for a rare clean break to start before going with a rather simple armbar. Hardy isn’t having that and picks up the pace by sending Finlay outside for a dive.

Back in and Jeff is sent shoulder first into the post and things slow right back down. The chinlock goes on, with Finlay adding in some elbows for two. Hardy tries to fight out but Finlay goes aerial with a basement dropkick, setting up another chinlock. Back up and Finlay sends him into the corner, allowing Jeff to hit a quick Whisper in the Wind. The slingshot dropkick is loaded up so Finlay grabs the shillelagh but the referee grabs it and calls for the DQ.

Rating: C+. I like the ending here and there is something fun about watching Finlay take someone apart. It is what he does best and you can believe that he is capable of hurting just about anyone you put him in there against. If nothing else, I can go for seeing the Intercontinental Champion not taking a pin in a match designed to set up another one.

Jeff clears Finlay out.

We look at Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels in the first Cell match.

Here is Undertaker for a chat. Undertaker talks about how evil the Cell is but no one comes out of it the same. He has been in it more than anyone else so let’s call it the Deadman’s Playground. On Sunday, Batista’s fate will be the same as everyone else and he will lose the World Heavyweight Championship. Oh and he will rest in peace. Much like Batista last week, this was short and to the point, which is a good thing.

Beth Phoenix/Victoria vs. Mickie James/Torrie Wilson

Mickie and Victoria start things off with Mickie getting out of a wristlock and grabbing a victory roll for two. Phoenix comes in to take Mickie down by the hair but Mickie sends her into the corner. That’s enough for the tag to Torrie, who gets in some forearms before Phoenix grabs her with a side slam. The Glam Slam finishes Torrie without much trouble.

Jeff Hardy goes to take care of some personal plans, which is cool with Matt Hardy. Kind of a random interaction.

Undertaker destroyed Mankind in and outside of the Cell.

It’s time for the VIP Lounge and MVP gets straight to the point by bringing in Matt Hardy as his guest. MVP talks about how they have been rivals but became partners and champions. Matt likes the sound of that, but brings up MVP pulling Jeff Hardy off the apron on ECW and injuring him to win a tag match. MVP’s explanation: he was in a wrestling match and tried to win! That’s not good enough for Matt, who wants his US Title shot. MVP says they need to worry about the Tag Team Titles but Matt says they aren’t friends. Matt wants his title shot right now….but MVP says they have to defend the Tag Team Titles RIGHT NOW.

Tag Team Titles: MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz and Morrison are challenging. Miz takes MVP into the corner for a clean break to start so MVP knees him in the head. The running boot in the corner tweaks MVP’s knee though and that means it’s off to Hardy. Morrison comes in and starts going off Matt’s knee so the champs can match. A clothesline gives Matt a breather but Morrison twists the knee right back down. Matt fights up again and tries the Twist of Fate but Miz chop blocks him and covers for the pin and titles in a big upset.

Rating: D+. That ending screams shenanigans and it would not surprise me to see something screwy happen after the match. MVP and Hardy did some great things as Tag Team Champions but at some point you have to move on to the next point in the story. That seems to be where we are going now and that is better than almost anything else they could do.

Post match MVP says not so fast because the rematch is being cashed in RIGHT NOW (while referring to Miz and Morrison as 98 Degrees and N’Sync).

Tag Team Titles: MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz and Morrison are defending. Joined in progress with the limping MVP hammering on Miz until the knee buckles. Matt comes in so Miz takes him down by the leg and starts cranking away. The Mizard of Oz gets two on Matt and Morrison grabs a half crab. That’s switched into something like a kneebar on the mat and Matt taps to retain the new champs’ titles.

Post match MVP helps Matt up…and then takes out the knee again. The big beatdown is on, with Matt’s knee being crushed in the steps. A shinbreaker onto the steps makes Matt scream and MVP’s leg seeming just fine.

Undertaker shoved Rikishi off the top of the Cell.

Survivor Series rundown.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey has bad ribs coming in but is fine enough to snap off an armdrag. Kennedy gets sent out to the floor fast but is ready for the dive, leaving Rey in the ring as we take a break. Back with Kennedy going for the mask before settling for a shot to the ribs to keep Rey in trouble. Some shoulders in the corner and a suplex give Kennedy two, setting up the bodyscissors.

Kennedy cranks away until Rey (who shouts that he can’t breathe) makes the rope so it’s out to the floor with the ribs being sent into various things. A torture rack of all things stays on the ribs until Rey slips out for a rollup and a near fall. Rey manages a spinning DDT to put them both down for a breather.

Back up and Rey hits the springboard spinning crossbody, setting up the springboard seated senton. A big kick to the head gives Rey two but Kennedy is right back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two of his own. The 619 looks to set up Dropping The Dime but Kennedy is too far away so Rey gets back inside. Kennedy takes him down again and loads up the Green Bay Plunge. That takes too long as well though, allowing Rey to hit a super hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: C+. Another case of two talented wrestlers having a good match and that is not the biggest surprise. Smackdown has been having these longer matches to give the show a more old school wrestling feel and that is a nice thing to see. This was a nice preview for Survivor Series and it actually gives one of the teams a bit more momentum for once.

Undertaker beat up Randy Orton in the Cell.

It’s time for the official weigh-in between Great Khali and Hornswoggle. After they both come out, Hornswoggle goes first and weighs 138lbs. Khali tries and breaks the scale, with Michael Cole saying that if Khali weighs 420lbs, he’ll outweigh Hornswoggle by more than 280lbs. Runjin Singh translates Khali’s rant about the people he has hurt. Then we get a photo opportunity between then and Hornswoggle cries, with Khali pointing at him and tearing up Hornswoggle’s hat.

Batista vs. Mark Henry

Non-title and No DQ. Batista knocks him down to start and they’re on the floor in a hurry. Back in and Batista works on the arm before going with a slam to show off. A belt shot to the head finishes Henry fast. This was similar to Undertaker vs. Great Khali last week, but without as much Khali.

Post match Batista takes him outside for a whip into the steps. Batista chokes him with a camera cord and spears him down. Cole attributes this to the Cell possessing his soul, but Batista cuts him off with some chair shots to Henry. Undertaker’s face appears on the Titantron (though Batista’s bugged out eye look easily tops it) to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I liked this show a pretty good bit as they set up some other Survivor Series matches aside from the main event. You can only get so far with the focus being on that one match and it is the kind of build that Survivor Series needed. Good show here, with some longer matches that made me want to see the pay per view that much more.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – November 9, 2007: The Build To One Match

Smackdown
Date: November 9, 2007
Location: Rabobank Arena, Bakersfield, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are almost up to Survivor Series and the main event is set. Other than that, Smackdown doesn’t have much going on at the moment though and they need to come up with something in the next week or so. This week will see Rey Mysterio vs. Finlay, in what should be the blowoff to a pretty decent feud. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Jesse/Festus, Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore, Deuce N Domino, Major Brothers, Dave Taylor/Drew McIntyre

Only one member has to be eliminated and the winners get a Tag Team Title shot later tonight. It’s a brawl to start with almost everyone getting together to eliminate Festus, who has to be forced to the back because the bell didn’t ring to snap him back to normal. Yang and Moore hit a double dropkick on McIntyre as there isn’t exactly much going on here. We finally get something out of the norm as Yang takes his shirt off, only to get kneed off the top and out to the floor.

For some reason we take a break and come back with Taylor being clotheslined out, leaving us with the Majors vs. Deuce N Domino. Brett gets knocked down but he’s able to make a last second save for Brian. A suplex/high crossbody combination hits Brett but Crack Them In Da Mouth is broken up, allowing the Majors to dump both of them out for the surprise win.

Rating: D+. This was about as good as it was going to get, as there isn’t much that can be done with a five team battle royal. The best part is the fact that they mixed it up a bit, as Deuce N Domino are done as a team that really matters, at least for the time being. The Majors have cooled way off, but at least they’re something that feels a lot more fresh.

Torrie Wilson asks Michelle McCool what is up with Michelle and Chuck Palumbo. Michelle says they’re just friends but Torrie isn’t convinced. Kenny Dykstra and Victoria come up and the brawl sets up a match.

We look back at the history of the Great Khali vs. Undertaker, as they face off in a No Holds Barred match tonight.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria

Chuck Palumbo and Kenny Dykstra are here too. McCool shoulders her down to start and cranks on a wristlock but Victoria manages to send her outside. Victoria gets in a ram into the barricade and takes her back inside for two. Back up and Michelle kicks her in the face, setting up a big boot. The guys get in a fight though and Victoria grabs a DDT for the fast pin.

Rey Mysterio isn’t worried about Finlay because Finlay doesn’t know him. After some Spanish, Rey declares himself a winner.

Jamie Noble interrupts Vickie Guerrero and CM Punk to thank Vickie for the Rey Mysterio DVD last week. He has a special….VHS with her, including the promise of, ahem, personal footage at the end. Punk likes the retro VHS but Noble goes into a rant about what Vickie has put him through. A match is made (after a discussion of pie). Noble: “Is this some kind of crazy fetish with you???” And give him back his tape! Noble continues to be absolutely hilarious in the last few weeks.

Finlay vs. Rey Mysterio

They start slowly and JBL is NOT pleased with the way the fans are chanting about Finlay. A hard clothesline drops Rey and it’s time to start the clubbing shots to the back. Rey hurricanranas him to the floor and adds a baseball slide into an Asai moonsault as we take a break. Back with Finlay getting in a shot of his own to take over again, with Rey getting rocked by a few kicks to the ribs.

Finlay sends him chest first into the buckle to break up a comeback and a buckle bomb has Rey in even more trouble. As commentary argues over whether the fans want competition or a fight, Finlay slams him legs first into the ropes and grabs a Boston crab. With that broken up, some knees to the back send Rey outside, where he is sent into the barricade. Back in and the Boston crab goes on again, with Rey getting out again.

A rollup out of the corner gives Rey two as a turnbuckle pad has been taken off somewhere in there. Rey hammers down some right hands but gets dropped face first onto the exposed buckle for two more. Another hard clothesline gives Finlay two but Rey slips out of a belly to back suplex. The 619 sets up the West Coast Pop, which is broken up with a knock off the ropes. Finlay hits the Celtic Cross for the completely clean pin.

Rating: B-. These guys work well together and they did so again here, with Finlay getting one of his bigger wins in recent months. It’s strange to see this one go down clean but Finlay beating Mysterio isn’t the biggest stretch. If nothing else, it is always fun to see Finlay pick someone apart like this and he did it well here.

Post match Finlay takes him outside for a laptop to the head and a ribs first ram into the post to leave Rey laying. Rey is so banged up that the mask comes off as the referee checks on him.

We look at Great Khali crushing Kane with the Vice Grip back in the day.

CM Punk vs. Jamie Noble

Non-title. Noble goes for the arm to start but gets kicked in the leg, setting up a triangle dropkick out to the floor. Back in and Noble manages a few kicks to the ribs, setting up a cobra clutch of all things. Some knees to the head seem to wake Punk up as he’s back with the running knee into/the bulldog out of the corner. Not that it matters as Miz runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. They really can’t have Noble take a pin from a reigning champion? Noble has been beaten like a drum and keeps coming back but I guess they had to draw the line somewhere. Punk getting onto one of the bigger shows is a good thing too as he should be starting to move in that direction in the next few months.

Post match John Morrison joins Miz in the beatdown. Punk gets in a GTS on Morrison but Noble hits his fireman’s carry gutbuster to drop Punk again.

Video on the Cell.

Here is Batista for a chat, with JBL getting a prompt phone call to allow himself a hasty escape. Batista says he and Undertaker are not friends, but he is pulling for Great Khali tonight. He wants Undertaker at his best in the Cell because he wants to prove that he is the better man. Everything is on the line and he’s ready for Undertaker. This was short but VERY to the point and it worked.

Tag Team Titles: MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Major Brothers

The Brothers are challenging. Brian armdrags Matt into an early armbar but Matt punches his way out of trouble. The corner clothesline into the corner bulldog (might not want to do such a similar sequence in the match right after Punk) and it’s off to MVP for a suplex. MVP isn’t interested in bringing Matt back in so he grabs the Playmaker for the pin to retain. Not much more than a squash here.

Post match, the champs don’t seem to trust each other.

Remember how Khali uses the Vice Grip? Here’s even more proof of it.

Fabulous Moolah tribute video.

Survivor Series rundown.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali

No Holds Barred. Undertaker starts striking away early on and hits a chokeslam less than a minute in. We take an early break and come back with Khali taking over in the corner and getting two off a clothesline. The nerve hold goes on for a bit, only to have Undertaker fight up. That’s countered into the Vice Grip but Undertaker punches his way out and hits an all time bad chokeslam (as Khali got all of an inch into the air) for two. Khali is right back with the chokeslam but stops to pose, allowing Undertaker to sit up. The triangle choke (possibly making his debut) makes Khali tap.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to see here as Undertaker wasn’t about to lose to Khali, who has fallen off the planet in the last few months. Beating Khali will always mean something because he is so big but he’s a three move combo at best. That doesn’t make for the most thrilling match but Undertaker getting in a new finisher was a nice touch.

Undertaker motions that he wants the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were a few minor bright spots in here but again it didn’t feel like a show you needed to watch. They are focusing hard on the Cell match to carry the Smackdown side of the pay per view and that should work, but I’m not sure how much else there is going to be that is worth seeing. Maybe they add in something more next week, though I don’t know what else they have to add. Fix that up and they could be ok, but it isn’t looking like a strong show nine days out.

 

 

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Smackdown – November 2, 2007: A Show In One Interview

Smackdown
Date: November 2, 2007
Location: Nassau Coliseum, New York City, New York
Attendance: 12,300
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are done with Cyber Sunday and the big story on the blue side is Batista FINALLY defeating the Undertaker to retain the World Title. It is time to get towards Survivor Series and that could go in more than a few directions. They don’t have a ton of time to set it up though so hopefully we start getting somewhere this week. Let’s get to it.

Here is Cyber Sunday if you need a recap.

Here is Batista to get things going. He talks about growing up in a rough neighborhood and having to fight for everything. Now he has done the same thing here, with every kind of fight you could imagine. Then on Sunday, he finally accomplished something he thought he would never do when he defeated the Undertaker. Their rivalry has been a war and now they are 1-1-2 and that makes them even.

Tonight they’re partners, but their differences have not been settled. He has Undertaker’s back but wants to know if Undertaker has his. There go the lights and Undertaker appears in the ring. Undertaker says he has Batista’s back because Batista still has the one thing that he wants. Batista asks if that means he wants a rematch, so the match is on. As Batista goes to leave, Undertaker says let’s do it in the Cell. Well that escalated.

In the back, Vickie Guerrero comes up to Jamie Noble, who panics and says he wasn’t hurting anyone. Vickie doesn’t have time for this because she has to work on the Cell match. Jamie thinks he’s being put in the match with them but she has a gift for him: a Rey Mysterio DVD, because he is facing Rey tonight. That works a lot better for Noble, who thinks Vickie is sweet on him. Oh and maybe later they could watch, ahem, some different DVDs.

Festus vs. Domino

Their respective partners are here too as Batista vs. Undertaker in the Cell is set for Survivor Series. Festus starts fast with a backdrop and some shots to the face for two. Domino goes to the eyes to escape and hits some knees to the face. That earns him another kick to the head as Jesse takes out an interfering Deuce. A fireman’s carry flapjack gives Festus the pin without much trouble.

Video on Eve winning the Diva Search.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Finlay, who is facing Rey next week, comes out to watch at ringside. Feeling out process to start with Jamie flipping him over by the arm and barring it for a bonus. That’s fine with Rey, who climbs up Noble and grabs a sunset flip for two. Back up and Noble hits a running knee to the ribs to cut Rey down but he’s fine enough to load up the 619. That sends Noble bailing to the floor, where Rey gets in a kick to the legs to put Noble in more trouble.

Noble gets back in and hits something like an over the shoulder backbreaker spun into a cutter over the top (that’s a new one) to take over. A northern lights suplex stays on the banged up arm and the armbar goes on again. Noble drops him face first onto the mat and puts on the armbar for a third time. That’s broken up and Rey headscissors him down into a Fujiwara armbar. Noble slips out so Rey hits a springboard seated senton, only to charge into a powerslam. The tiger driver is loaded up but Rey reverses into a hurricanrana for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where you can have two guys do just about anything get a good match out of them. Noble has been used as a goon in recent weeks but he is capable of doing something like this if he is given the chance. Rey vs. Finlay sounds like it should be a good blowoff match next week too, as they have had a solid feud over the last few weeks.

Post match Finlay calls Rey a quitter and a loser, which he’ll prove next week.

Raw Rebound.

Matt Hardy is still healing and he’ll be ready to go next week. That’s cool with MVP, because he survived at Cyber Sunday and they need to get back to dominating. Matt agrees, and wishes MVP luck in his match tonight. MVP doesn’t know anything about a match, but it’s next…and Kane’s pyro goes off.

MVP vs. Kane

Non-title. Kane punches him down to start and a hard whip into the corner bangs up MVP’s ribs. Back up and MVP gets in a few shots of his own but a backbreaker gives Kane two. Some shots to Kane’s bad ribs (you might want to come up with something different) slow him down though and a running shoulder to the ribs gives MVP two of his own.

Kane rocks him with an uppercut but MVP is right back on the ribs as they aren’t making this very complicated. That’s reversed into a bearhug on the mat but MVP reverses into a seated abdominal stretch. MVP kicks him out to the floor and we come back with Kane having to fight out of a bodyscissors. Kane gets in a faceplant out of the corner and the top rope clothesline connects, setting up the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure who put this together but they could have done a bit better than an exchange of working on the ribs over and over. Have Kane’s shoulder hit the post or something but find a way to mix it up. Also, the US Champion gets pinned again, which probably doesn’t set up another title match, but at least they had this happen again because of course they did.

Post match Big Daddy V comes in to drop Kane and crush the ribs again. Cole: “He is a mean man!”

Mick Foley vs. Jonathan Coachman

Foley is the hometown boy and this match needs a guest referee in the form of Hornswoggle. Coach realizes he’s in trouble and Foley shoves him over Hornswoggle to make it worse. Foley rakes his eyes over the top and drops an elbow, setting up the green Mr. Socko. Hornswoggle adds the Tadpole Splash so Foley can get the pin. Just a quick way to make the live fans smile.

Next week, ECW World Champion CM Punk comes to Smackdown.

Kenny Dykstra vs. Chuck Palumbo

Victoria and Michelle McCool are here too. Palumbo hits him in the face to start and grabs a belly to back suplex for an early two. They head outside with Palumbo being sent back first into the apron as JBL talks about what a great future Dykstra has. Back in and Palumbo snaps off an overhead belly to belly. Michelle cuts off Victoria’s interference and Palumbo hits a top rope shoulder. Full Throttle finishes Dykstra off.

Rating: D+. Palumbo’s total stall continues and that is due to having him face people like Kenny Dykstra and Chris Masters. WWE has presented him as nothing more than a lower level guy and there is no reason to care about him. You’re only going to get so far with this and Palumbo has hit that point.

Rey Mysterio’s DVD went on sale last week.

Great Khali and Mark Henry shout at each other in a strategy session.

Great Khali/Mark Henry vs. Undertaker/Batista

Undertaker starts fast on Henry but Old School is broken up. Some shots to the arm put Henry in the corner though and now Old School connects. Henry gets knocked off the apron and we take an early break. Back with Batista driving Henry into the corner as well, allowing Undertaker to come in for a headbutt.

A running knee in the corner gets two (and has Batista impressed) but Henry powers Undertaker into the corner to bring in Khali. Since you don’t want Khali doing much more than kicking away in the corner, Henry comes back in and gets taken down with the running DDT. Batista comes in and gets elbowed in the face by Khali, setting up the big chop for two.

The Vice Grip goes on and makes Undertaker pace on the apron before eventually making the save. Batista spears Khali down and it’s back to Undertaker to unload on Henry. Everything breaks down and Batista spinebusters Henry, followed by Undertaker big booting Khali. The Batista Bomb is loaded up….but JBL runs in to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C. This worked in a bit of a weird way, mainly because no one is going to buy Henry and Khali as a threat to the top two forces on the show. They didn’t bother having Undertaker and Batista in that much trouble, but the ending was a bit of a surprise. JBL is pretty clearly getting ready to make some kind of a comeback, though I’m not sure how much interest there is in having another big guy on a show with so many monsters.

Henry and Khali wreck Batista and Undertaker to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was all about the Undertaker vs. Batista Cell announcement and a grand total of nothing else. The second biggest thing on this show was finding out that Rey Mysterio has a new DVD out. Maybe it’s fallout from the pay per view or not needing much for Survivor Series, but this was a weak show and I was pretty bored.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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