Smackdown – April 6, 2007: The Last Victory Lap

Smackdown
Date: April 6, 2007
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are done with Wrestlemania and that means it is time to back in the glory of a pretty awesome show. I’m not sure what that is going to entail, but this time around we should be in for at least an appearance from Undertaker, who won the Smackdown World Title on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Here is Wrestlemania if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Mr. Money in the Bank/Kennedy to get things going. Kennedy brags about the briefcase’s power and promises that the Kennedy Era will have begun. Begun.

Jeff Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy

They fight over a lockup to start and go up against the ropes with neither being able to get very far. Jeff shoulders him down and grabs an armdrag into an armbar. Kennedy gets sent outside for the slingshot dropkick through the ropes into the big dive. We take a break and come back with Jeff hitting the sitout gordbuster.

The Swanton is broken up though and Kennedy bends him around the post to work on the ribs, setting up a seated abdominal stretch. Back up and Kennedy knees him in the ribs to cut off a comeback attempt and there’s a backbreaker to make it worse. The regular abdominal stretch goes on but Hardy hiptosses his way to freedom. Whisper in the Wind drops Kennedy again but a REALLY far Swanton only hits mat. The DDT finishes Hardy, which Cole calls cashing in on victory. It’s going to be a long contract holding time.

Rating: C. Pretty standard match here with Kennedy getting a nice win as he gets ready to move forward with the briefcase. That’s the right thing for him to do and the kind of win that he needs. Kennedy has cheated to beat a bunch of top names, but he needs to prove that he can get some clean pins like this one.

Post match, Hornswoggle charges at Kennedy but it’s Finlay jumping Kennedy from behind and promising violence if Kennedy ever hurts Hornswoggle again.

Wrestlemania got a lot of press.

Krystal is in Teddy Long’s office and they had a great time at Wrestlemania, plus AFTER the show. Teddy gets a card to open later but Mr. Kennedy comes in to say he wants him in the ring. After some clarification, Teddy figures out that he means Hornswoggle and the match is on for next week. Oh and we’ll make it a handicap match with Finlay involved too. Kennedy leaves upset and Long opens the card, which he says is amazing.

Ashley runs into Timbaland (music producer) and praises his music. Jillian Hall comes in to audition for him and Ashley/Timbaland aren’t impressed.

Wrestlemania music video.

Chris Benoit vs. The Miz

Non-title and Miz is looking fiery here. They fight over a lockup to start and Miz grabs a headlock. You don’t do that to Benoit, who snaps off a belly to back suplex for the break. A backdrop has Miz in more trouble and a snap suplex gives Benoit two. The chops put Miz into the corner and Benoit sends him out to the apron. That means a heck of a chop to stop him cold but Miz manages to snap the throat across the top rope.

Miz hammers and stomps away and the cravate puts Benoit in more trouble. Benoit can’t even roll out of it so Miz knocks him into the corner for the running clothesline. Some elbows to the head give Miz two and it’s off to another chinlock. That’s broken up as well and Benoit starts striking away to take over.

The release German suplex sends Miz flying so Benoit loads up the Swanton, only to have MVP pull Miz away at the last second. It might not sound like much, but factor in that Miz was probably 75% of the way across the ring and Benoit would have connected. That’s one of the longest top rope jumps I’ve ever seen and the crash landing lets Miz steal the pin. JBL sounding crushed at the fact that Miz just beat Benoit is great.

Rating: C-. Not the most thrilling match here but good night that jump was a sight to behold. You don’t see someone get that kind of distance most of the time and unfortunately it didn’t get the credit it deserved. MVP vs. Benoit continues and odds are we’ll get a rematch at Backlash, or whatever the next Smackdown pay per view is. Works for me, as long as MVP keeps facing international champions.

We look at Matt Hardy going after Sharmell in Money in the Bank to distract King Booker. JBL: “He made the wrong choice.”

Booker and Sharmell aren’t happy and swear revenge.

King Booker vs. Matt Hardy

Queen Sharmell is here with Booker. Matt punches him into the corner to start, setting up the clothesline in to the bulldog for two. Booker is back up with a kick to the face and Sharmell adds some choking from the floor. A spinebuster plants Matt, who is bleeding from the mouth, for no cover. Instead it’s a quickly broken chinlock, followed by an elbow to the face.

Matt is right back up with a neckbreaker and Matt’s own elbow gets two. Booker isn’t having any of that and kicks Matt in the face for two more. We hit the abdominal stretch and Booker throws in some elbows to the ribs. That’s shifted into an armbar but Matt fights up again and hits the Side Effect. Matt’s rollup gets two but Booker superkicks him hard. Back up and Booker tries a backslide, only to have Hardy grab a small package for the quick pin.

Rating: C. I don’t think there is any surprise tot he fact that these two could have a fine enough match if they were given time. The amount of holds wasn’t quite interesting but at least they got to do a little bit here and tie it back in to what happened at Wrestlemania. Sharmell seems to be getting some more focus though and that might not be the most thrilling concept.

Post match Sharmell yells about Matt violating her at Wrestlemania and then Booker LOSES. Sharmell walks out on him, leaving Booker upset.

Kane vs. Dave Taylor

William Regal is here too and jumps Kane before the match. Kane beats both of them up without much trouble and leaves them laying. No match.

Booker apologizes to Sharmell and things seem to be better. Then she slaps him.

Mark Henry is coming back.

Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. Chavo Guerrero/Gregory Helms

Non-title and here are Deuce & Domino and Cherry to watch from their car. Helms takes London down to start and drops an early leg for two. Chavo comes in for an armbar followed by a dropkick for a quick two. The champs are right back up with running headscissors to put Guerrero and Helms on the floor, setting up the big dives.

We take a break and come back with Helms’ swinging Rock Bottom backbreaker getting two on Kendrick. The alternating beating in the corner is on, setting up Chavo’s front facelock. That doesn’t last long though as the hot tag brings in London to clean house in a hurry. A Nightmare on Helm Street gives Helms two as everything breaks down. Chavo’s superplex is broken up though and he gets sent outside. A Sliced Bread/sitout powerbomb combination gives Kendrick the pin.

Rating: C+. As JBL keeps saying, London and Kendrick are fun to watch. That’s exactly the case and it’s hard not to like them. To have held the titles this long and still be so entertaining is quite the trick that they have pulled off. It is probably time to drop the titles though, and it actually makes me a bit sad because these guys really are that good.

Deuce & Domino want the titles.

The Condemned had a big premiere in Detroit.

Booker is upset about Sharmell.

Hall of Fame video.

We’ve got druids so I think you know what that means. Here’s the Undertaker, fresh off winning the Smackdown World Title at Wrestlemania. Before he can say anything though, cue Batista, who marches straight down to the ring. Batista says congratulations and he wants his rematch. Undertaker nods and Batista leaves but here is King Booker to jump Undertaker from behind. That doesn’t go well for Booker, as the Tombstone onto the announcers’ table leaves him laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. As has been the case with almost everything else this week, this was more about taking a breather rather than doing anything meaningful. Booker going after Undertaker and the rematch being set up are fine, but this was a show that didn’t really do much as far as setting up things. For the first show after the biggest night of the year, that is completely fine.

 

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Smackdown – March 30, 2007: They Didn’t Screw It Up

Smackdown
Date: March 30, 2007
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final (of three) go home shows for Wrestlemania and I wouldn’t bet on seeing much in the way of important action here. That is perfectly fine in this case and they would be insane to try anything too complicated. We’re sure to get a lot of talking about Wrestlemania though and that should work out well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Edge for a match with Matt Hardy, but first he wants to talk about Money in the Bank. Edge knows what it means to be in a match like this and what it can mean. He has cashed the briefcase in before and has won more ladder matches than everyone else in the match combined, so he’ll be winning again.

Edge vs. Matt Hardy

Actually hang on as Edge isn’t wrestling tonight, but he has a replacement.

Great Khali vs. Matt Hardy

Edge is at ringside as Matt hammers away to no avail to start. Khali kicks him down in the corner and the chokeslam is loaded up….but here is Kane. Well at least his pyro, so Khali goes up the ramp and Kane appears on screen. Kane holds up the hook and says two more days….and I guess the match just ends.

Teddy Long is making some dinner reservations when Krystal comes in. He has made dinner reservations for them, plus some dancing. Krystal shows off her ring gear and kisses him on the cheek before leaving. Long is rather pleased.

Finlay vs. Mr. Kennedy

There is a ladder at ringside and Kennedy points out the briefcase above the ring. They go with the hard lockup to start and fall out to the floor with neither being able to get an advantage. Back in and Finlay works on the hammerlock so Kennedy elbows his way to freedom. Kennedy nails a running boot in the corner for two but Finlay catches him trying to take off the turnbuckle pad. It’s too early to send Kennedy into the buckle though, as he reverses into a whip into said buckle.

The Regal Roll gives Kennedy two so it’s time for a ladder, which goes rather badly. Finlay goes shoulder first into the post and Kennedy rolls him up for two. Since pulling out a ladder didn’t work, Kennedy goes with the big ladder already set up at ringside. For some reason Kennedy throws it at Finlay, who ducks and hits a clothesline. Cue Hornswoggle with a two foot stepladder to Kenton Bomb Kennedy. Finlay grabs the Celtic Cross for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a bit of a messy match as they didn’t exactly have chemistry. Heel vs. heel is always a bit weird and I wasn’t exactly getting into it. The match certainly wasn’t bad or anything, but I was more waiting on it to finish up than getting into it, which is never a good sign.

We look at Vince McMahon pinning Bobby Lashley, albeit with some help, on Raw.

Maryse welcomes us back from commercial. Her robe opening up is just an accident of course.

MVP vs. Vito Batomango

Batomango’s Ethiopian Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. You might remember him from the earlier days of TNA as D-Ray 3000. MVP stomps him down and hits the running big boot in the corner. Some knees to the ribs set up some Chris Benoit style rolling German suplexes. The Playmaker finishes for MVP in a total squash. The gimmick is kind of funny actually.

Post match MVP says he has made 5 pay per view appearances. At Wrestlemania, he is facing the man who is “4 real” and the referee will count 3. In 2 days, there is 1 United States Champion. That wasn’t bad.

We look at Batista and Undertaker erupting last week.

Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy

They fight over a lockup to start until Jeff grabs a hammerlock. Orton fights up but gets caught in an armbar to mix up the cranking a bit. A rollup gives Jeff two and a sitout gordbuster drops Orton onto his head for the same. Jeff tries to jump over him in the corner but gets blasted with a clothesline to the floor. We take a break and come back with Orton grinding away on a chinlock.

Hardy fights up but walks into the backbreaker for two. The Garvin Stomp keeps Hardy in trouble and the dropkick sets up the choking on the ropes. Another chinlock has Hardy in trouble but he fights up again, this time with a Sling Blade. The slingshot dropkick in the corner gets two but Orton rolls away before the Swanton can launch. Cue Edge to go after Hardy so Orton yells at him, allowing Hardy to hook a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: C+. This got some time and Hardy getting the pin on Orton isn’t the biggest upset in the world. The good thing here was keeping up Edge vs. Orton, which has potential to be a heck of an upper midcard feud if that is the way they go. It’s nice to have something other than building momentum for the ladder match and it has helped a lot over the last few weeks.

We look back at Undertaker and Batista fighting last week.

We look at Shawn Michaels superkicking John Cena on Raw.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Melina/Victoria/Jillian Hall/Michelle McCool/Krystal vs. Ashley/Torrie Wilson/Candice Michelle/Maria/Mickie James

Mickie snapmares Victoria down into a basement dropkick to start but a regular dropkick misses. Michelle comes in and starts kicking away, followed by the same from Melina. Jillian gets in the hair toss and a slam, meaning it’s time to pose. Victoria’s elbow misses though and it’s off to Candice for a slam of her own, plus the Go Daddy dance. Maria gets in the Bronco Buster on Victoria and Torrie throws in a Stink Face. It’s off to Ashley for the real work though and house is cleaned in a hurry. Melina runs away from a fight and Ashley reverses Jillian’s powerbomb into a hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: D. I think you got the idea here and they weren’t exactly being subtle about everything they were doing. The match wasn’t any good because most of them aren’t really wrestlers, but Ashley looked a bit more competent so maybe there has been some coaching between her recent mess and this one.

King Booker vs. CM Punk

Booker has Queen Sharmell with him and backs Punk into the corner. Some right hands rock Punk but he snapmares Booker into a basement dropkick to the back of the head. Back up and Booker kicks him in the face, setting up the knees to the face to make it even worse. A pull of the hair cuts Punk off again and Booker elbows him in the face for two. The seated armbar doesn’t last long as Punk is back up with even more kicks to the head. An enziguri gets two but Booker takes him right back down for another chinlock. That’s too far for Punk, who pops up into a bridging rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty dull match here, but it isn’t a surprise that they would want to keep things slow with two days to go before Wrestlemania. Just going six and a half minutes was surprising enough, but you can only get so far with a bunch of chinlocks and armbars. It’s nice to see Punk get a bigger win for once though.

We look at Shawn Michaels finally turning on John Cena on Raw.

Shawn Michaels is All Grown Up.

Video of the Wrestlemania press conference, where Donald Trump slapped Vince McMahon.

JBL gets in the ring for the big interview between Batista and Undertaker….but gets Steve Austin instead. Austin doesn’t waste time and Stuns JBL, allowing beer to be consumed.

Post break, Teddy Long brings out Batista and Undertaker for the real interview. Security keeps them apart, with Teddy saying this is Smackdown and not Wrestlemania. Batista says he doesn’t have as much respect for Undertaker, who has no response. Teddy asks what it is going to take to beat Undertaker. Batista: “48 hours.” The fight is on with security getting taken out. The spinebuster plants Undertaker, who sits up as Batista leaves. More staring and shouting ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They didn’t screw up, the ending was good, and we even got a long match. This was a fine go home show and that’s all it needed to be as they are on a roll heading into Detroit. I want to see the show as they have set everything up as well as possible. Good stuff here, which doesn’t surprise me at all after what they have done over the last month and a half or so.

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 27, 2007: Happy Birthday Pop

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 27, 2007
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and this time, ECW actually matters quite a bit in the show. This time we have the ECW Originals vs. New Breed eight man tag, plus the ECW Champion in what is really the show’s main event. I’m curious to see how a go home show will go around here so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a quick look at Vince McMahon pinning Bobby Lashley on Raw, albeit via a lot of shenanigans.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Elijah Burke

No seconds in a bit of a surprise. They go to the mat to start with Rob trying a backslide, only to have Burke drop down onto him for a creative counter. Rob simplifies things a bit by kicking him in the face and putting him on top top the top rope kick to the face. That means Rob van hit the big running flip dive to take Burke down again as we go to a break.

Back with Rolling Thunder hitting raised knees and a pair of suplexes giving Burke two. A Texas Cloverleaf of all things puts Rob in more trouble so he grabs a rope for the break. Burke grabs a chinlock with a knee in the back but Rob fights up and hits the spinwheel kick for two. The Elijah Express only hits buckle though and Rob nails the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was another momentum building match towards Wrestlemania and that is perfectly fine in this situation. You need to keep Van Dam strong if you want the Originals to seem like they have any chance of winning on Sunday so this was a fine way to go. Burke continues to have some great charisma and he seems like he should be a bigger star than he already is.

Post match the New Breed runs in for the brawl but the ECW Originals make the save.

Extreme Expose.

Edge comes in to see CM Punk and the Hardys before their eight man tag tonight. They should work together to take out four other people in Money in the Bank. Punk and the Hardys don’t say no.

Snitsky vs. Balls Mahoney

Snitsky knocks him off the apron at the bell and sends Mahoney into the post for a bonus. Back in and another big boot finishes for Snitsky in a hurry.

We look at Vince McMahon (with some help) pinning Bobby Lashley on Raw.

King Booker suggests an alliance with Finlay tonight but Finlay isn’t interested.

We get a split screen sitdown interview with Vince McMahon and Bobby Lashley. Vince is looking forward to Wrestlemania being over because he beat Lashley last night. Sure Lashley has some credentials, but it’s a good thing Vince didn’t take his sweatshirt off last night. Vince follows the law of the jungle and it is going to come out at Wrestlemania when Umaga destroys Lashley for good. Then Donald Trump will be bald. Lashley: “Listen you old b******.” Vince will be bald at Wrestlemania. Lashley talked for about five seconds here.

Mr. Kennedy/Randy Orton/King Booker/Finlay vs. Matt Hardy/Jeff Hardy/Edge/CM Punk

Joined in progress with Matt hitting a Side Effect for two on Kennedy as we start fast. The Hardys take over on Kennedy but Jeff misses a charge, allowing Orton to come in and stomp away. A quick Whisper in the Wind gives Jeff two and Matt comes back in with the middle rope legdrop for two. Punk comes in but has to chase off Kennedy, allowing Finlay to come in and elbow him down.

It’s Booker coming in to hammer away with right hands and Finlay grabs the chinlock. Orton’s clothesline gets two and Booker grabs a front facelock. That’s broken up and Punk hits the running knee into the corner, setting up the bulldog. While that should be enough for the hot tag, Edge walks out and leaves instead as everything breaks down. Booker nails a quick ax kick to finish Punk.

Rating: C. This was as main event taggy as a main event tag can be and anyone could have gotten the pin. Edge walking out was completely expected of him and made all the sense in the world. I like that this match has gotten some more attention as of late, as it has a lot of people involved so many other things have gotten more attention.

The winning team brawls post match until the Hardys come in with a ladder (it is their nature) to clean house. Finlay is busted next to the eye and the Hardys go up the big ladder and grab the briefcase at the same time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There is something fun about a show where they just stop focusing on the main stories and shift everything over to the Wrestlemania build. It worked well here and that’s all they needed to do. The show was still fine enough and the main event gave us some nice build towards Money in the Bank. Another show you don’t need to watch, but it helped with the important stuff.

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Dynamite – August 25, 2021: On Their Worst Days

Dynamite
Date: August 25, 2021
Location: UW-Milwaukee Panther Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Excalibur, Tony Schiavone

Then everything changed. CM Punk made his, ahem, surprise debut last week on Rampage in what might be the greatest moment AEW has had in its history. Other than that….I mean does anything else really matter? All Out is in a week and a half and most of the card seems to be set but there are still some spots available. Let’s get to it.

Here is Rampage if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We get a quick clip from Punk’s debut on Rampage.

Orange Cassidy vs. Matt Hardy

No seconds here for a change. We open with the DELETE vs. lazy kicks, which I think we’ve seen before. Matt breaks up the lazy superkick though and reaches into his own pockets to pull out money. Cassidy hits the dropkick into the nipup, complete with hands in his pockets. Then he picks up the money and put it into his pocket. Well some of it at least, as he would rather dive onto Matt, who catches him with the Side Effect on the floor.

Cassidy’s ribs are wrapped around the post and it’s back inside (with a bunch of money on the mat) for some belly to back suplexes. Matt stops to pick up a bunch of money and even steals the money back from Cassidy (as he should, since Cassidy is a thief). Cassidy tries to fight back but Beach Break is countered into a nasty Splash Mountain for two. The Twist of Fate is blocked though and Cassidy takes him down.

A high crossbody lands on Hardy’s face and Hardy is busted open. Cassidy goes up, hits the Jeff Hardy pose, and puts his hands in his pockets for the Swanton. Hardy blocks a Twist of Fate and a top rope elbow hits Cassidy’s back again. Then Cassidy grabs his own Twist of Fate for two as Matt’s blood is all over Cassidy. Hardy tries a guillotine choke but Cassidy reverses into a cradle with his hands in the pockets for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C+. The match was good enough, despite it having a lot of comedy and being two guys I’m not fond of most of the time. Cassidy should be beating Hardy, who doesn’t need to be going over just about anyone at this point. Also, it was very, very refreshing to have a straight match without 437 people getting involved at the same time.

Aleister Black is ready to destroy Arn Anderson’s son, plus the rest of the Nightmare Family. That could take a whole lot of destructing.

Here is Chris Jericho to talk about tapping out to MJF last week. Jericho talks about the Labors of Jericho and how he came up short in the grand finale. It has become a mantra for him: “BEAT MJF! BEAT MJF! BEAT MJF!” Jericho has an idea for a final match between them but MJF won’t come out. His idea is one more match at All Out, where he will put his career on the line.

Cue MJF with a “MJF – 3, Jeriblow – 0” shirt, to say this is getting a little embarrassing. He knows Jericho needed a rub from the fastest rising star in the history of professional wrestling, but the cash cow’s udders are sore. Last week, MJF made him tap out faster than someone listening to a Fozzy CD, but the idea of Jericho never wrestling again is too much to pass up so the match is on. That was about the only way they could go after last week.

The Varsity Blonds say they’re a real family and they’re ready to beat the Lucha Bros.

Tag Team Title #1 Contenders Tournament First Round: Varsity Blonds vs. Lucha Bros

Julia Hart is here with the Blonds and the Elite comes out to watch. Garrison can’t get very far with Fenix so it’s off to Pillman to superkick Penta. A running hurricanrana takes Penta down but he is right back with a Sling Blade. Back from a break with Penta taking down both Blonds and handing it back to Fenix for a bunch of kicks.

The rolling cutter gets two on Pillman and everything breaks down, including Fenix hitting a very fast suicide dive onto the Blonds. Back in and Pillman hits a heck of a powerbomb for two on Fenix. Garrison adds a springboard elbow but Penta makes the save this time. The Bros send Garrison outside and it’s an assisted Fear Factor for the pin at 8:23.

Rating: C+. It was fun while it lasted and the right team won in the end. The Lucha Bros are about as awesome of a team as you’re going to find when they are on a roll and that was the case there. What mattered here was getting the right team moving forward, and the Varsity Blonds will have their day (eventually).

Post match Jurassic Express joins the Lucha Bros in the ring. The Elite tries to come in and are knocked off the apron in a hurry.

Video on Pac vs. Andrade.

All Out rundown, now including Britt Baker defending the Women’s Title against Kris Statlander.

Jamie Hayter vs. Red Velvet

Hayter has Britt Baker and Rebel in her corner. Hayter wastes no time in throwing Velvet into the corner for the choking. Velvet manages to send her to the floor for back to back suicide dives (with Hayter going flat down for a different kind of selling). A hard posting drops Velvet and Baker gets in a few cheap shots as we take a break. Back with Velvet winning a slugout and hitting a running elbow against the ropes. Some running knees connect on the ropes but Baker offers a distraction, allowing Hayter to hit a hard lariat for the pin at 6:53.

Rating: C. Velvet got in some offense here and that should have been the case when she was getting the title shot just two weeks ago. Hayter needs to get a few wins to establish herself as someone to beat and this was a good step. Put her over someone Baker beat so that Hayter looks like she is on a higher level.

Post match the beatdown is on but Kris Statlander makes the save.

The Dark Order doesn’t seem to be on the same page over, uh, Page. Alex Reynolds doesn’t like what Evil Uno has been saying and walks out, with John Silver going with him. Uno tries to apologize but the rest of the team isn’t thrilled either.

Tony Schiavone brings out CM Punk for a chat. Punk is asked what one thing brought him back to wrestling, but Punk can’t hear over all of the people. Punk lists off some of the younger wrestlers who he wants to face, but there is one guy who has gotten his attention first. He’s going to retire the nickname Voice of the Voiceless because there are people who have a voice and there are people who listen.

Punk has been looking at someone like Darby Allin who looks like he is willing to kill himself. There are people asking if Punk can still go and if he still has it to be the best in the world. He looks at Allin and sees someone who would have been Punk’s favorite wrestler at 15 years old. Allin isn’t the biggest or the strongest but he has heart.

Can Punk still do it? Fans: “YES! YES! YES!” Punk: “That’s someone else’s thing and you just have to wait a little longer.” He’ll see Allin in Chicago and loves his wife April. Punk gets a very strong sendoff. This was a straight promo from Punk and it was a good way to set up the Darby match at All Out.

Miro talks about how he will forgive Fuego del Sol but he is going to drag Eddie Kingston under the water because he is the Redeemer. Bring him the Mad King before he burns this place to the ground.

Eddie Kingston/Jon Moxley/Darby Allin vs. Wingmen

Sting and Peter Avalon are here too. Allin chokes the much bigger JD Drake to start and sends him outside. The big dive has to be canceled so Ryan Nemeth swivels his hips at Kingston. A single chop gets rid of him so Cezar Bononi comes in to shrug off Kingston’s chops. Moxley tags himself in and a double shoulder clears the ring.

We take a break and come back with Moxley suplexing Bononi and it’s Kingston coming in to strike away on Drake. Moxley has to save Kingston from a Vader Bomb with a bite to Drake’s face, allowing Allin to hit a super Code Red. Avalon gets beaten up on the floor as Nemeth tries to bring in a chair. That goes horrible, and it’s a flipping Stunner into the Coffin Drop to finish Drake at 7:40.

Rating: C. This was a total weekend show main event and that’s all it needed to be. I was worried about the Wingmen giving three much bigger names too much of a problem but they got out of there just in time. Good enough match here, even if it was just a workout for the openers.

Post match everyone else is brawling on the floor so here is Daniel Garcia to jump Allin from behind.

Tay Conti is ready for the Casino Battle Royal but the Bunny comes in to offer her a spot in the Hardy Family Office. The contract is ripped up with a NO and the fight is on.

FTR wants one more match with Santana and Ortiz.

Here is the Elite to promise to take out Christian Cage. Cue Cage, to show a video of Don Callis hyping up the ten year old Kenny Omega, which is why he fired Christian. Back in the ring, Omega says that makes him like Vince McMahon, Verne Gagne or Eddie Graham, but this isn’t Greg Gagne or Eric Watts. Christian accuses Callis of manipulating Omega, who asks Christian “You think you know me?” Callis takes off his pink suit and the group beatdown is on until Frankie Kazarian runs in for the save with a lead pipe.

Jon Moxley sent a contract to New Japan and got it sent back with one signature. Satoshi Kojima has signed the deal and Moxley is ready to send him out in a blaze of glory. Moxley wants to do some horrible things to Kojima and he’ll see him at All Out.

Gunn Club vs. The Factory

Paul Wight is on commentary. Comoroto gets sent outside to start and it’s off to Solow, who gets taken down by Austin. Marshall gets in a cheap shot though and we take a break. Back with Colton coming in to clean house as everything breaks down. Marshall stops to yell at Wight though and the distraction lets Colton grab the small package win at 5:51. Not enough shown to rate, but it was just a way to mess with Marshall.

Dan Lambert, with the Men of the Year, rants about wrestling fans being soft and how they all want their safe spaces. Those people need to believe in men like these two, and there may be hope for them yet.

Arn Anderson knows that his son Brock is in over his head and he’s probably going to lose to Malaki Black. He’ll be there with his son though.

Brock Anderson vs. Malakai Black

Brock takes him down and hammers away but Black unloads with strikes in the corner. Hold on though as Black yells at Arn, allowing Brock to get in a few shots to the leg. That earns Brock a suplex and Black Mass, making Arn cringe. The delayed pin finishes Brock at 2:29.

Post match Arn comes in to check on Brock but Black has a chair. Arn is ready to fight and blocks a kick to the head. He can’t block a low blow though and then the kick to the head drops Arn. Lee Johnson runs in for the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t the must see episode as it was much more about having the people involved in the bigger stories talking rather than wrestling. That being said, this is the show that All Out has been needing as everything else has been cleared out and the pay per view could get some focus. It’s not a show you need to watch, but there was some good storyline advancement and nothing bad up and down the show.

Results
Orange Cassidy b. Matt Hardy – Rollup
Lucha Bros b. Varsity Blonds – Assisted Fear Factor to Pillman
Jamie Hayter b. Red Velvet – Lariat
Eddie Kingston/Darby Allin/Jon Moxley b. Wingmen – Coffin Drop to Drake
Gunn Club b. The Factory – Small package to Marshall
Malaki Black b. Brock Anderson – Black Mass

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Monday Night Raw – March 21, 2007: I Want To See It

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 26, 2007
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 15,146
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and that means we are not likely to see a lot of wrestling this time around. Instead, expect a heck of a lot of talking, plus some rather short matches to get everyone to Detroit as safely as possible. That being said, we have a heck of a double main event with Bobby Lashley vs. Vince McMahon and a No Way Out main event with Shawn Michaels/John Cena vs. Batista/Undertaker. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Coach in the ring to announce that Vince McMahon vs. Bobby Lashley is now No DQ, but any interference will result in a fine and suspension. Cue Steve Austin to another thunderous pop and he has a story to tell Coach. He was sitting down at the ranch and got a bunch of gifts, in the form of a new four wheeler, a rifle, a hunting knife and more. Every gift that he got was from Donald Trump and he thinks that Trump is trying to buy him off.

Coach thinks so to but Vince would never…..and Austin cuts him off, saying that he told the delivery driver to take them all back. It turns out that they came from Stamford, Connecticut and the offices of Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Does Vince think Austin is stupid enough to think that Trump is buying him off? Coach says no one thinks he is stupid and eventually admits that he was the one who sent the gifts.

Austin isn’t pleased but explains that he will beat up both Lashley and Umaga if they don’t listen to him at Wrestlemania. Coach understands the idea, but he does not understand why Vince and Trump are worried about being bald. Austin and Coach show that bald is beautiful….and there’s the Stunner. Beer is consumed and poured onto Coach.

Post break, Austin leaves in his truck but gets cut off by Vince McMahon’s limo. Vince comes out of the sun roof to yell but sees Austin, who flips him off for old times’ sake. With Austin gone, Vince gets out, pulls the driver out, beats him up, and fires him.

Jillian Hall/Victoria/Melina vs. Torrie Wilson/Ashley/Candice Michelle

Ashley rolls Melina up for an early near fall and it’s off to Candice to spinwheel kick Victoria. The Go Daddy dance takes too long and Victoria kicks Candice down. The Tree of Woe sets up a running Bronco Buster to the upside down Candice and Jillian comes in for the assortment of hair pulling. Candice avoids a flipping legdrop and crawls over (nearly crawling out of her shorts on the way there) for the hot tag to Ashley. Everything breaks down with Ashley snapping off some headscissors. The other four brawl, leaving Ashley to victory roll Hall for the pin.

Rating: D. I think you can figure out the reason behind this one and seeing Ashley’s house cleaning at the end was not exactly appealing. It isn’t Ashley’s fault that she can’t learn how to be a wrestler in the span of a few months. The title match isn’t going to be about the technical side and that wasn’t the case here either. Not good wrestling, but that wasn’t what this was for in the first place.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

CM Punk vs. Kenny Dykstra

Punk is the hometown boy and Dykstra jumps him on the way in. Dykstra hammers away and kicks Punk off the top before he has the chance to doing anything. The chinlock doesn’t last long but a jumping back elbow cuts Punk down again. Some clotheslines give Dykstra two and we hit another chinlock. Back up again and Punk knees his way out of a front facelock, setting up the springboard clothesline. More knees, including one in the corner, sets up the bulldog for two. The still yet to be named Go To Sleep finishes Dykstra.

Rating: C-. This was a nice way to have Punk get a come from behind win in his hometown while also building him up a bit for Wrestlemania. It isn’t hard to figure this one out and they did it well enough. They didn’t do anything flashy here as it was just a nice win with a guy beating someone beneath him. Don’t make this more complicated than it needs to be.

Post match Edge pops up on screen to say Punk isn’t winning at Wrestlemania. Don’t worry though, because Punk is going to get his chance to respond in the first ever eight man edition of the Cutting Edge.

Clip of Bobby Lashley crashing through the cage wall to get to Umaga on ECW. That’s still great.

All of the Money in the Bank participants are in the ring as Edge comes out for the big interview. Edge brags about his success in ladder matches, which includes winning more ladder matches than everyone in here combined. Throw in that he has never lost at Wrestlemania and why should anyone else have a chance? How is Matt Hardy even on Wrestlemania?

Matt promises to be in Edge’s face but makes the mistake of mentioning Lita and gets cut off. King Booker talks about all of his success but mentions the word peasants, which is too far for Finlay. He is sick of all this nonsense because everyone else sounds like a bunch of old women. Finlay to Edge: “You didn’t like that chisel chin?” Randy Orton tells Finlay to not hurt Edge’s feelings because Edge needs an excuse to bail out of this match like he has done for the last month.

Mr. Kennedy cuts them off (big reaction) but Edge cuts that off as well and mocks Jeff Hardy’s pose. Jeff says this is going to be his first Wrestlemania in five years so he plans to steal the show. He’ll go through his own brother if it means winning Money in the Bank. The CM PUNK chants cut everyone off so Edge asks him about being straightedge.

Edge: “Well my addictions are sex, violence and championship gold around my waste.” Punk says Edge seems to be addicted to running his mouth and the fight is on. Edge slips out while everyone else fights, with the Hardys and Punk standing tall….until they realize Edge is on the ramp. The chase is on and we take a break.

John Cena explains how we are going to have Playboy bunnies, vampires, ladders, the Queen of Soul and MICHAEL COLE at Wrestlemania. Cena: “WHO KEEPS INVITING MICHAEL COLE???” We’re going to have a legend killer, the Deadman and a bald billionaire, but after all that, there will be John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels.

People will talk about it for years, even Maria when her grandkids are there and certain parts of her are hanging down to her knees. Maria isn’t convinced, but Cena gets serious and talks about how he is going to carve his name into the history books. One man will be left standing and he will proudly say THE CHAMP IS HERE. This was Cena’s hard sell at the end and it worked as always.

We look at Vince McMahon not being able to bribe Bobby Lashley. Then Lashley threatened violence against the boss.

Vince McMahon vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and No DQ, though interference is not allowed. Before the match, Vince says that he isn’t going to embarrass him with his physical dominance, because he’ll just pin Lashley instead. NOW you can ring the bell….and Vince drops to the floor. Cue Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch to go after Lashley, with limited success.

Now it’s Chris Masters coming in but he can’t get the Masterlock. John Morrison comes in and goes after Lashley, earning himself a running powerslam. Umaga and Armando Alejandro Estrada come in as well and the real fight is on. The numbers finally take Lashley down (Vince’s low blow helped) and Umaga’s pop up Samoan Drop lets Vince get the pin.

Post match the big beatdown is on, including the running hip attack in the corner and the Samoan Spike. That means Vince can get another pin to really prove himself, followed by one more Samoan Spike.

During the break, Vince promises to win on Sunday and then shave Donald Trump’s head. Cue Eugene in a Trump outfit, complete with wig, but Vince rips the wig off and leaves.

Randy Orton/Mr. Kennedy vs. Hardys

You would think this kind of a reunion would be built up a bit more. Orton jogs out to the stage for a weird visual. Matt headlocks Orton to start and hits a quick middle rope elbow to the back of the head for one. Jeff comes in but gets knocked into the corner by Kennedy so the stomping can begin. An anklescissors gets Jeff out of the corner but Kennedy sends him hard out to the floor.

Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table and we hit the chinlock back inside. Kennedy comes back in but his belly to back superplex is broken up, allowing Jeff to hit the Whisper in the Wind. The hot tag brings in Matt to clean house but he takes too long setting up the Twist of Fate on Orton. Kennedy makes the save but gets taken to the floor by Jeff. That’s fine with Orton, who grabs the RKO for the pin on Matt.

Rating: C-. This was the momentum building match, but it’s a little hard to buy that the Hardys are going to lose clean to a makeshift team in less than five minutes. I know the match doesn’t mean a thing going forward, but the Hardys losing to Orton and Kennedy? It isn’t a huge stretch, but it is a bit of a surprise.

The final inductee into the Hall of Fame class is…..Jim Ross. You can’t have Lawler go in without Ross so this is appropriate. The wrestlers imitating JR’s catchphrases is pretty awesome. JR gets a very emotional moment with the crowd, including a standing ovation.

Great Khali vs. Ric Flair

The destruction is on in a hurry and they head outside, with Khali loading up the chokeslam onto the steps. Cue Carlito for the fast DQ to save Flair.

Carlito gets destroyed for being nice but Kane comes in for the real save.

Ladies and Gentlemen by Saliva is the official theme song of the show. They let you know when they perform it in concert too.

The Condemned is coming.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Shawn Michaels talks about facing John Cena before but this is different than ever before. Every legend, icon, immortal, New York Times bestseller and great have stood across the ring from him but none of them could get it done. Yet here he is, standing the test of time because he is the main event, the icon and the showstopper. On Sunday, Shawn is going to take Cena to the top of the mountain but first, Cena has to go through the valley. Shawn is walking out as WWE Champion, but he has his partner’s back tonight. This was a heck of a promo, which isn’t really Shawn’s strong suit most of the time.

Shawn Michaels/John Cena vs. Batista/Undertaker

Non-title. The entrances take the better part of ever until it’s Undertaker and Cena taking turns throwing the other into the corner for right hands. Snake Eyes drops Cena but the big boot is countered into a failed FU attempt. Shawn comes in but gets kicked in the face, leaving Cena to get clotheslined. Batista comes in to help clean house but Undertaker is ready to fight.

Cena breaks that up (he isn’t always that bright and is soundly booed) and Shawn comes in to get rid of the Smackdown guys. Shawn whips Undertaker into the steps, followed by a swinging neckbreaker for two back inside. It’s back to Cena, who gets dropped with the jumping clothesline. Batista is back in for the shoulders to the ribs but Cena bulldogs him down (again with the booing).

Everything breaks down and Undertaker boots Shawn in the face. There’s a spinebuster to Cena but Undertaker throws Shawn at Batista to break up the Batista Bomb (in a callback to Smackdown). That’s enough for Undertaker, who walks out, leaving Cena to initiate the finishing sequence on Batista. Shawn joins in on the double Shuffle…..and FINALLY superkicks Cena to give Batista the pin.

Rating: B. This was ALL about the storylines working on their own and the tag match was just happening at the same time. What makes it works is the two stories being so well built up that I wanted to see what happened. The fact that you had four people who can work a good match like this and they didn’t stop for the entire time they had. Good action, but better storytelling, which is more important anyway.

We actually take one more break and come back with….replays of the superkick to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The wrestling here was completely inconsequential. This show was about accomplishing one goal and it did just that: I want to watch Wrestlemania. This year’s build has been one of the best that I can remember and as long as Smackdown isn’t a total disaster, they have done an outstanding job of making me want to see the show. Good build to the pay per view, even if it would have been quite the miss as a regular show. It wasn’t a regular show though, and that’s what matters.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – March 16, 2007: Keep It Going A Bit Longer

Smackdown
Date: March 16, 2007
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

I’m really not sure what to expect here and I kind of like that feeling. Last week’s Smackdown was a complete success with a pair of gems in Undertaker vs. Finlay and Kane vs. Batista. If they can come close to that this week, they are going to be in fine shape as they round the turn towards Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Batista to get things going (while rocking the heck out of a suit) on MizTV. Miz sucks up to Batista for the sake of not being ripped in half and brings out the latest WWE Magazine. There is an interview in here where Batista said that he was unstoppable, but Undertaker is the one who is really unstoppable. Miz thinks Undertaker could come out here right now and take Batista apart. The lights go off but pop back up and Miz laughs because he paid some guy in the back to turn them off. Batista finds if funny and shakes Miz’s hand….but he doesn’t find Miz funny. Destruction ensues.

Ashley and Kane are going to be on Smallville. I remember that episode.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Matt Hardy

Feeling out process to start with Kennedy not looking all that worried. Hardy takes him down with a hammerlock but gets sent into the corner for his efforts. That earns Kennedy a running clothesline and they crash out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kennedy grabbing a cravate to keep Hardy in trouble.

Hardy fights up but the corner bulldog is shoved away, allowing Kennedy to hit a chop block. The leg is slammed into the apron and some knees to the knee keep Hardy in trouble. A clothesline gives Kennedy two and the Indian Deathlock goes on. Hardy turns it over (Does that hurt?) and Kennedy has to grab the rope for the break.

Kennedy is fine enough to go up and miss the Kenton Bomb, allowing Hardy to strike away. The Side Effect gives Hardy two and Kennedy’s rollup, while grabbing the rope, gets the same. Another Regal Roll is countered into the Twist of Fate to give Hardy the fast pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. This was a longer match and it’s weird to see Kennedy getting pinned clean. Kennedy worked over the leg for a good chunk of the match and then but Hardy worked through it until he could win in the end. That’s a story that works well for both guys and Hardy winning reminds you that he is actually pretty good around here.

Post break, Kennedy says that he’s still winning Money in the Bank.

MVP vs. El Grande Latte

Non-title, as Latte’s Honduran Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Cole brags about winning his Little League championship as MVP dismantles the rather thin Latte. Ballin connects and MVP ties him in the Tree of Woe to stomp away. The Playmaker finishes for MVP in a hurry.

Post match, MVP reiterates his challenge to Chris Benoit for Wrestlemania. MVP lists off some of the great US Champions and says he has more style than Ric Flair and more skill than Harley Race. He’s living the American Dream too as the poor boy from Miami, but maybe Chris Benoit isn’t hearing him. Maybe we should change his name from the Crippler to the Coward. Cue Teddy Long to say the match is on and here is Benoit to start the brawl.

This Monday: John Cena vs. Chris Benoit and Shawn Michaels vs. JBL. Cole isn’t convinced but JBL says he has something planned.

Melina/MNM vs. Ashley/Brian Kendrick/Paul London

Mercury (now without the mask) headlocks Kendrick to start but it’s quickly off to London to work on the arm. Enough about a match with half the people involved being champions though, as it’s time to talk about Vince McMahon and Donald Trump. The women come in and stare at each other before handing it back to Kendrick and Nitro. Everything breaks down and a double dive to the floor takes MNM down.

Back in and Melina gets in a cheap shot to the ribs and it’s a reverse chinlock with a knee in the back to keep him down. Nitro grabs the cravate and it’s back to Mercury to stay on him with some right hands. A double belly to back faceplant gets two on Kendrick and we’re off to a chinlock. Mercury goes after Ashley but the distraction allows the hot tag to London. Everything breaks down and Melina gets in a cheap shot on Ashley, leaving London to walk into the Snapshot for the pin.

Rating: C. The women might as well have been on the outside here but I get the concept at least. I’m not sure how bad it is going to be for Ashley to be in a title match at Wrestlemania but the fact that she was barely active here isn’t the most encouraging. The guys could probably work this match in their sleep, but London and Kendrick haven’t been around much as of late so there wasn’t a ton of energy to the whole thing.

Video tribute to Ernie Ladd.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell are not happy that he has to wrestle the Undertaker tonight. Finlay comes in looking for Hornswoggle but they don’t care about him. Hold on though, as Booker asks Finlay for advice against Undertaker. Finlay: “RUN!” The guys leave and Hornswoggle appears, carrying a pitcher of beer. He wishes Sharmell a Happy St. Patrick’s Day and asks for a kiss, sending her running off screaming. Well that was creepy.

Celebrities pick Vince McMahon vs. Donald Trump.

Long video on the Trump vs. McMahon contract signing.

Daivari vs. Kane

Kane’s entrance cuts off Daivari’s rant so we’re starting fast. The destruction doesn’t take long as Kane knocks him into the corner and hammers away with the variety you would probably expect. The choke shove sends Daivari out through the ropes and it’s a chokeslam onto the steps. Then Kane grabs the hook chain and ties Daivari up, which I think is enough for the no contest.

Post break Kane drags Daivari backstage and seemingly into the boiler room.

Mr. Fuji Hall of Fame video.

Undertaker vs. King Booker

Batista is on commentary. Booker actually wins an early slugout but the advantage doesn’t last long as Undertaker punches him into the corner. They’re on the floor in a hurry with Booker going face first into the steps. Back in and Old School is broken up, allowing Booker to drop him with a running forearm. A big boot takes Booker down just as fast for two and now Old School can connect.

Undertaker’s running DDT gets two and it’s time for the slow rights and lefts in the corner. As Undertaker clotheslines him outside, JBL says that Batista is better than King Kong Bundy and Giant Gonzalez. Undertaker makes the mistake of stopping to glare at Batista though and Booker gets in a cheap shot as we take a break. Back with Booker hitting a side slam for two and grabbing a chinlock. That’s broken up and Undertaker pulls him outside to start the brawling again.

They get back inside with Booker kneeing away to block a superkick and we hit the front facelock. Booker hammers away but Undertaker does it a bit better, setting up Snake Eyes into the big boot. Undertaker hits the jumping clothesline but Booker is back with the jumping side kick for two. Back up and the Undertaker tries the Last Ride, only to get jumped by Finlay for the DQ.

Rating: C+. These two beat each other up and that’s all you can ask for here. Well maybe save for Undertaker getting the pin, as it isn’t like Booker losing to Undertaker is going to derail him. Booker was actually working harder here and it was a harder hitting offense than usual this week. Good match, but the ending was a bit weird.

Post match the brawl is on with Undertaker getting the better of things, including throwing Finlay into Batista. Undertaker walks up the ramp as Batista is livid to end the show. This has been a really well built story so far and I want to see these two fight.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t as good as last week, but that was a pretty high ceiling to reach. What matters here is they are making Wrestlemania look good and none of the recent shows have been awful. If they can keep that momentum up for the next two weeks, Wrestlemania might be even better than it seems, which would be rather impressive. Another good show this week.

 

 

 

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Dynamite – August 11, 2021: Now With Super Speed And Stupid Villains

Dynamite
Date: August 11, 2021
Location: Petersen Events Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur

It’s the Britt Baker Show this week and that is pretty long overdue. Baker has been the best thing about the women’s division, if not the entire company, for a long time now and deserves a big hometown night like this. Other than that, we are getting ready for both All Out and this week Rampage debut. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

MJF, with Wardlow, talk about how Chris Jericho is trying to make his way through the Labors of Jericho, but tonight he is running into a monster. Jericho needs to defeat MJF because he never has before and he can’t handle that. Somehow though, let’s say that he makes it through Wardlow, what do you think is waiting on him? MJF brings up Wardlow losing to Cody Rhodes in the cage last year though and tells him not to mess up again. Wardlow destroys the apple MJF hands him.

Elite vs. Mike Sydal/Matt Sydal/Dante Martin

Don Callis is on commentary and during the entrances, we’re told that Kenny Omega will defend against Christian Cage at All Out. That’s going to get some people talking. Mike gets sent into the corner by Matt Jackson to start but comes back with a rollup for two. Nick comes in and rakes Martin’s eyes but a rather spinning headscissors takes Nick down. Omega comes in to take Martin down and is booed out of the building.

The Sydals come in for double enziguris to Omega, followed by the double baseball slides. Dante is launches out onto them, with Mike joining in but Matt Sydal hanging back. They head back inside with Martin hitting a high crossbody on Matt Jackson (who thankfully is fine after having his leg go underneath him on the landing). Omega comes in to shove Mike down and the Elite starts taking their turns.

The Kitaro Crusher gets two but Mike slips away and gets the hot tag to Matt Sydal. Everything breaks down and the Sydals grab a Muta Lock/Crossface combination on Matt Jackson. That’s broken up by Omega who snaps off some snapdragons. Martin comes in to clean house and then gets the hot tag to clean house again. A running springboard hurricanrana to the floor drops Omega and a moonsault gets two on Matt Jackson.

We hit the parade of shots to the face, capped off by Omega hitting a heck of a V Trigger to Martin. The One Winged Angel is countered though and Martin hits a Pele. Another V Trigger cuts that off but Martin counters a Tiger Driver 98 into a rollup. A third V Trigger and the One Winged Angel plant Martin as the Bucks superkick the Sydals. The BTE V Trigger finishes Martin at 12:18.

Rating: B. Now this was more like it, as the Elite shouldn’t have been sweating these guys and then had to turn it up to pull off the win. Martin’s comebacks against Omega at the win made for a good sequence and more than one of the counters surprised me. Good stuff here and the kind of Elite swagger I can go for on occasion. That being said, this was a breakout performance from Martin, whose high flying stuff looked great and had the fans going nuts.

Post match Callis gets in the ring for a chat but here is Christian Cage to cut them off. The Jurassic Express comes in to even things up a bit and we take a break. Back with Callis taking the mic from Christian, who does get a bit of praise. It’s true that Christian has a great finisher and Omega can’t wait to kick out of it. Christian calls Callis a piece of s*** and then uses….whatever Pittsburgh term he uses for a bad person. Callis says of course Christian isn’t getting his title shot in Pittsburgh, but Christian has heard something else.

See, Omega has a lot of titles, and according to Tony Khan, he’ll be defending the Impact Wrestling World Title on Friday, in the first match of Rampage. The music plays but Jungle Boy says hang on a second. It turns out that he has been talking to Khan as well, so next week on Dynamite, the Jurassic Express gets a shot at the Young Bucks. Omega is so annoyed that he has nothing to say after cutting the music.

We look back at Malakai Black laying out Cody Rhodes last week while talking about how he has one foot on Cody and one foot in the grave.

Cody and Brandi Rhodes have a new reality show starting September 29.

Miro is ready to destroy Fuego del Sol.

Daniel Garcia vs. Darby Allin

Garcia has 2.0 (formerly Ever-Rise) and Allin has Sting. Allin grabs a headlock to start but Garcia shoves him off and shoulders him into an armbar. Garcia takes him into the ropes as one of 2.0 offers a distraction, allowing Garcia to send Allin arm first into the buckle. We take a break and come back with Garcia pulling him off the ropes.

A double arm lock allows Garcia to kick Allin in the head until he can reach the rope with a boot. Garcia slaps him in the back, which just seems to bring Allin back to live. A rear naked choke out of nowhere has Allin in trouble but he flips backwards for two and the break. The flipping Stunner plants Garcia and the Coffin Drop is enough for the pin on Garcia at 10:39.

Rating: C+. I remember seeing a lot of Garcia over Wrestlemania weekend and being impressed. I’m glad to see him getting a chance here and that is a good thing. The same is true of 2.0, who are great at being the goofy lackeys. Allin continues to be built up for something big, and they are certainly teasing the huge showdown in Chicago.

Post match 2.0 goes after Allin but Sting takes them out. Allin gets back up and 2.0 is cleared out in a hurry.

Death Triangle doesn’t like what Andrade El Idolo has been doing to mess with them. Pac says the Lucha Bros are the best and deserve gold. As for Andrade, if he wants some of Pac, come find him.

Orange Cassidy/Chuck Taylor/Wheeler Yuta vs. Matt Hardy/Private Party

Kris Statlander and the rest of the Hardy Family Office are here too. Hardy and Cassidy have the DELETE vs. Pockets staredown to start, with Cassidy putting Hardy’s hand in his own pocket to start. That’s enough for two off a rollup but Hardy is back up with the Side Effect for two. Cassidy rolls away before Matt can launch the middle rope elbow and avoids a charge in the corner.

The falling middle rope splash gets two and it’s Marq Quen coming in to set up a missed Poetry In Motion. Cassidy slow motion kicks Quen in the knee and drops low to set up Yuta’s running charge. Taylor adds Soul Food and Yuta hits something like an Angle Slam for two. The Silly String plants Yuta though and the near fall sends us to a break. Back with everything breaking down and the women getting in an argument on the floor.

Cue Nyla Rose to run Statlander over and Jack Evans to take out Yuta. Everything breaks down and it’s a parade of secondary finishers until Yuta hits a top rope splash for two on Kassidy. Matt sends Taylor into the barricade (and nearly runs a referee over on the way). Gin and Juice hits Yuta but Cassidy makes the save and hits an Orange Punch on Kassidy. Hardy sends Quen into Kassidy and the Twist of Fate finishes Yuta at 9:53.

Rating: C. The action was certainly energized but there were WAY too many people involved in this match. You had all seven members of the Hardy Family Office, Cassidy, Taylor, Statlander, Rose and Yuta. That’s double the amount of people actually in the match and it was way too much going on to keep track of what was happening. Just keep some of them in the back or break it up a bit because a lot of the fun was lost due to the calamity.

Chavo Guerrero is offended by the Death Triangle’s comments but thinks Andrade El Idolo vs. Pac sounds good for All Out.

Santana and Ortiz want to hurt FTR even more because it isn’t over.

Nyla Rose vs. Kris Statlander

Great. Nyla Rose is here twice. Vickie Guerrero and Orange Cassidy are here too. Rose runs her over to start but Statlander gets in a shot of her own. Vickie screams at Cassidy to mess him up, allowing Rose to hit a chokeslam onto the apron for two. Statlander handstands her way to freedom but gets speared down, allowing Rose to load up a superplex. That’s countered into a powerbomb out of the corner and Area 451 finishes Rose at 2:59.

The Young Bucks are back at the basketball and say that beating the Jurassic Express will be like a layup. Cue Luchasaurus to block it and say not in his house. Nick calls it a foul but Brandon Cutler says it was all ball. When AEW gets a theme going, they run with it until the bitter end. That being said, it was a funny segment.

Video on Britt Baker vs. Red Velvet in the main event of the first Rampage. Velvet is on a roll and gets a title shot against Baker in Baker’s hometown.

Tony Schiavone brings out Britt Baker for a chat, meaning the fans get to wave the yellow towels (Pittsburgh Steelers tradition). Baker can’t really comment on Red Velvet’s rise because she is on the top of AEW. She wasn’t afraid to step up when this city needed a champion and holds up the title, because it means hope. Speaking of hope, Red Velvet might have a glimmer of it if the match wasn’t taking place in Pittsburgh. With that out of the way, Baker needs Tony to practice his DMD, which seems to go well. Cue Red Velvet for the brawl before the title match.

Ricky Starks says he is a man instead of a machine and is ready for Brian Cage.

Impact Tag Team Titles: Dark Order vs. Good Brothers

The Brothers are defending and Impact’s Scott D’Amore is on commentary. The Order jumps them to start and it’s Anderson in trouble in a hurry. Brandon Cutler offers a distraction so here is Frankie Kazarian to take care of him. We take a break and come back with Grayson getting the hot tag and cleaning house. A 450 gives Grayson two and the Fatality is loaded up. Cutler breaks that up and it’s a Gun Stun to Grayson, setting up the Magic Killer to retain at 7:39.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to get very far, but at the same time, that is a lot better than having the Good Brothers out there for a long match. I don’t know if there was any drama about the Dark Order actually winning here, but if they ever actually do, the pop is going to be other worldly.

NWA Women’s Champion Kamille is ready for Leylah Hirsch.

Here is QT Marshall and the Nightmare Factory to get the apology from Tony Schiavone. Therefore, they grab Tony’s son from the crowd and beat him up, despite Tony apologizing (and calling Marshall a son of a b****). Cue Paul Wight to wreck everyone.

Here’s what’s coming next week, including Sting/Darby Allin vs. 2.0 in a Texas Tornado match.

Chris Jericho vs. Wardlow

This is the fourth Labor of Jericho and MJF is at ringside. Jericho starts fast and hits a Codebreaker for one, which just seems to annoy Wardlow. They head outside with Jericho being sent into the barricade and post as the dominance is on. Back in and Wardlow hits a pair of powerbombs to send us to a break.

We come back with Wardlow hitting another powerbomb but Jericho chops away. That just earns him the F10 but MJF says keep going instead of covering. Jericho grabs the legs and puts on the Walls but MJF rakes the eyes for the break. MJF tries to slip Wardlow the Dynamite Diamond but gets caught, meaning it’s an elimination. Jericho uses the distraction to get in a shot with Floyd, setting up the Judas Effect for the pin at 10:07.

Rating: C. First off: am I crazy or was MJF announced as guest referee coming into this? Anyway, the match was mostly a squash until the wacky finish and that’s how you get Wardlow to look like a monster. Jericho had to hit him in the face with a baseball bat to win so it isn’t like he beat him clean. This was little more than a means to an end though and there was little drama as a result. In this case, that’s how the match should go.

Post match Shawn Spears runs in to jump Jericho, which draws in Sammy Guevara for the save. Wardlow and MJF run back in to beat on Jericho, including the Salt of the Earth on the bad arm, but Jake Hager makes the real save. MJF grabs the mic and says the match is on for next week, but there will be no Judas Effect or Judas music. That’s a pretty lame way to go, especially since Jericho used his other two (and more famous) finishers in the match, with commentary bragging about how awesome the Codebreaker has been over the years.

Overall Rating: B. I’m not sure where to start here as this was a PACKED show with all kinds of things going on throughout the night. The first thing I would say is that I was entertained though, as they threw in so much stuff that it was never once boring. This was the kind of energized show that WWE has not had in years and only NXT has had in a long time. That part was very fun and is the kind of thing that AEW has focused on over its existence.

That being said, there are still quite a few issues here, with the biggest being the amount of people running around. There were multiple matches here with WAY too many people involved and it dragged things down almost every time. AEW’s roster is far, far too big for one show and having everyone running around all the time keeps things from leaving as much of an impact as they should. In the same vein, it felt like nothing had a chance to breathe because they were building up Rampage, Dynamite and All Out at the same time, while also focusing on titles from three different promotions (with AAA there as well).

Overall, I liked the show a lot but there were times where I was getting frustrated by how many things were going on. That has been an issue with AEW for a long time, as they try to pack in way too much stuff. I’m half hopeful that Rampage will help, but at the same time I’m worried that they will keep Dynamite the same and add even more in on Rampage. Maybe not, but they need to find a way to pace things a bit better. Still though, heck of a fun show.

Results
Elite b. Mike Sydal/Matt Sydal/Dante Martin – One Winged Angel to Martin
Darby Allin b. Daniel Garcia – Coffin Drop
Matt Hardy/Private Party b. Wheeler Yuta/Orange Cassidy/Chuck Taylor – Twist of Fate to Yuta
Kris Statlander b. Nyla Rose – Area 451
Good Brothers b. Dark Order – Magic Killer to Grayson
Chris Jericho b. Wardlow – Judas Effect

 

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2008 (Original): Summerslam Likes Double Main Events

Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

Another year and here we are at the final Summerslam before this year’s installment. The main guys are still the main guys, except CM Punk is now the World Heavyweight Champion. The belts have switched again by the way. The real main event here is Batista vs. Cena but the match going on last is Taker vs. Edge in the Cell to finally blow off this feud.

They tried to make this show more of a dream card and I think to an extent it worked. HHH vs. Great Khali is the other title match and it’s gotten a lot of criticism, but I’ve always liked it. Since it’s been such a short time since this show, there’s only so much I can rant on here, but let’s get to it.

The theme of this show is the biggest blockbuster of the summer. This led to some creative ideas of various wrestlers in movie roles, with the best one being Jericho as Indiana Jones. The voiceover guy says there’s never been a box office bust. He never saw Summerslam 1995 did he? They play up Taker and Edge as the main event which is fine as it’s likely the bigger match. I’ll get to that later as it deserves a real tribute for one of the promos that was done about it.

Jeff Hardy vs. MVP

Jeff would be launched into the world title scene shortly after this, eventually getting the title in December. Needless to say, he’s ridiculously over. Ross says that Hardy gets a Michael Phelps like reaction. That’s just funny knowing what we know now about Phelps. MVP is still full heel here as he should be every time he’s in the ring. The set looks cool too as it looks like a movie marquee with the match that’s going on at the moment on it. I like that.

MVP is dominating this. Hardy has had next to no offense the entire match as it’s been all MVP since he hit a belly to belly suplex very early on which messed up Jeff’s neck and back. Since then, that’s all MVP has worked on. What a great concept. Someone hurts something and you go after it. Who would have thought of something like that?

There’s so much back and neck work here that it’s like I’m watching an Angle match. Hardy gets to the apron and tries a springboard move but MVP just punches him in the face. I freaking LOVE that. When all else fails, just hit him in the face.

MVP gets him down in the corner and sets up for the Drive By, but apparently his slapping the mat, posing and yelling allows Jeff to hear him coming and he avoids it. Jeff makes his comeback but as he’s going for the Bomb, Shelton runs out and Jeff dives on him. He misses the Swanton this time and MVP kicks him in the head for the pin. I don’t remember Jeff and Shelton doing anything.

Rating: B. This was a good match. The psychology was right there and MVP got the win which he needed far more than Hardy. Hardy just got beaten up in this match and he got beaten up badly, so that’s a perk. Either way, this was a good match with both guys looking solid. Why they never pulled the trigger on MVP I’m not sure.

Maria is an interviewer tonight I guess and is with Santino and Beth. This was when Santino was I guess at his peak and so of course the company decided to shove him down our throats. Beth looks ungodly hot here.

We have a poll about will Edge and Vickie divorce? Yes they would about 6 months later.

IC/Women’s Title: Mickie/Kofi vs. Beth/Santino

There’s a very simple concept here as Adamle was out of room on the card for both matches so he put them together and the winners leave with both titles. I love Kofi as the IC Champion. He was young, good, popular and in need of the push. What more can you ask for from the IC Champion? Mickie needs to wear white more often. The men can fight the women here. Beth beats up Mickie but she beats up Santino as spellcheck hates this match.

Kofi beats up the Italian so this is getting better all the time. Kofi is one of the few guys that can pull off the all yellow look. This is a lot of stalling until Kofi can kick it into high gear. Santino is pure comedy here, or at least an attempt at it. Mickie beats him up even more, but Beth catches Mickie with the Implant Buster or whatever it’s called to win it. Cole calls Beth he I think by mistake. Beth carries Santino out on her shoulders.

Rating: D. Not only was it boring but the booking was stupid. Oh yeah let’s take the belt off of a great choice in Kofi for the sake of comedy! Yeah the belt will be just fine. This was the beginning of the killing of the IC belt that it took Rey to save. I hated this, but Kofi and Mickie’s figure brings us back to a passing grade.

Buy the Hardy Boys DVD.

We hear about Shawn’s eye injury from the Great American Bash. More or less, he’s going to announce if he’s retiring or not here tonight. Jericho wants him gone. He was wrestling at house shows in between the PPVs, so obviously he wasn’t’ that hurt. Shawn comes out with his very hot wife named ReBECCA for this big announcement. She’s taller than he is. That’s just funny. This is going to be a long segment.

Shawn surprisingly says that he’s going to retire. Shawn thanks the fans and goes through all of his career highlights, including the screwjob and beginning DX. Geez his hair is falling out fast. As he’s thanking everyone, Jericho’s music kicks on. You know for someone that’s gotten rid of everything old, he’s sticking to that music like processed horse. Jericho says that he wants Shawn to admit that he’s quitting because of Jericho and not the eye injury.

Shawn says he’ll sit his kids and his wife down and admit that but Jericho has to sit his wife and kids down and tell them that he’ll never be Shawn Michaels. The crowd pops like crazy over that as this is one of the best segments I’ve ever seen. To up this even further, Shawn turns to leave but Jericho throws a punch that hits Shawn’s wife. Jericho leaves as Shawn is panicking. Everyone runs out to help her as Jericho leaves. The fans are eating this up with a spoon.

She sold it perfectly too so that’s helping a lot. This would lead to Shawn nearly killing Jericho at Unforgiven where Jericho would actually win the title, leading to the ladder match at No Mercy to finally end this feud.

Some movie is sponsoring this show.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry

Henry is champion here. He came over to ECW and just tore the place up, leading to this match. This is what I guess you could call the Michael Hayes Special. It was around this time that Hayes had used some racial slurs in the back and Henry complained about it. Soon therafter, Kofi won the IC Title, Shelton got the US Title and Henry the ECW Title. You might call it a coincidence, but it’s a bit too much for me to believe.

Henry even got the new belt because it didn’t fit around his overly large gut. He also has Tony Atlas with him here for no apparent reason. I think it was because Henry is horrible as a talker. We get the big fight introductions which never cease being cool. Bell rings and we’re off. Striker tells us who is who and what colors they’re wearing since we couldn’t tell that ourselves. Matt pops him with some punches but Henry just powers him to the corner.

Wait, Matt hits the Twist and goes for the cover? What the heck? Atlas pulls him out…and it’s a DQ in 30 seconds. Um, WHAT THE HECK? I know the Shawn segment was long but DUDE, you couldn’t fit in a three minute match before we do this? Oh that’s right. We had to have Santino celebrate instead.

Atlas beats on Matt but Jeff runs out and helps fight the two muscle guys off. Striker says the Hardys might be the best tag team in the last twenty years. Yeah, I’m not going near that one as it’s too easy to make fun of.

Rating: N/A. Really, what was the point of this? Matt would get the title the next month.

Ad for the Summerslam Anthology.

Same poll question is asked.

We get a recap of JBL vs. Punk. Punk won the title back in June in an epic moment, stealing the belt from Edge with the MITB contract. The problem was Punk was treated badly as champion, just as he was in his second reign. Think about it. This past reign he lost clean to Morrison twice. In the first reign, Batista won or barely lost at least once. Why can they not just give him a clean win? Maybe they will here, but over a weak opponent.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. CM Punk

Punk’s line of “some people like to refer to me as a fluke. I like to refer to myself as world heavyweight champion.” is just great. Punk gets a solid reaction during the intros. It’s not huge but it’s good. They talk about how this is a culture clash and they’re exactly right. I really like that actually as it’s definitely old school vs. new school as they say it is. For once they’re absolutely right. I love that suicide dive that Punk throws out a lot of the time.

They actually call JBL Bradshaw which I haven’t heard him referred to in forever. JBL tries a bearhug but it turns into a reverse waistlock. JBL is pretty bad at this point as his injuries were just getting to be too much for him. The main thing here is Punk’s ribs being worked on, which while a bit generic is something that works just about every time. Bradshaw’s style works well there so it’s not like he is doing something out of the ordinary.

A few submissions follow but surprisingly enough Punk wins a slug out. He hits a leg lariat but in an unplanned spot, JBL’s head slams into Punk’s which busts him open without cutting him. That was just painful looking. They hammer on each other a bit more, but Punk avoids a big power move to hit the GTS for a clean pin. I know that was short, but it wasn’t designed to be an epic match.

It was about 11 minutes and it made Punk look good as it was supposed to. He needed a clean win with the GTS to make himself look at least respectable. Lawler and Cole don’t do him any favors as they still talk about how he’s a fluke champion and a Cinderella story. Why do they need to do that? We get it, but the point of that match was to build him up a bit harder. Why mention what they were trying to overcome here?

Rating: B-. It was pretty generic at times, but it was certainly solid. JBL was doing what he was best at: slow methodical offense that made Punk look good when he came back from it. This was what Punk needed to make his reign a lot more credible: a clean pinfall victory over a big name. He would lose the title without being in the match next month due to the Scramble while JBL would move on to HBK after he got done with Jericho.

Khali is warming up in the back. That leads us to this recap. There wasn’t much of a story here other than Khali wanting a shot. The basic idea of this feud is simple: HHH can’t get the Pedigree on Khali.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

The fans pop huge for HHH. Khali’s size is flat out scary. I’ve seen him at house shows and he’s just absolutely massive. We get a cool stat that the WWE Title has been defended 17 times out of 20 Summerslams but it’s only changed 3 times. That’s very impressive actually. One more time we get the big match introductions. Khali is booed pretty loudly. HHH is only 255 here so he’s slimmed down a bit. HHH is the faster guy here which isn’t something you see that often.

He goes for the Pedigree within 30 seconds which doesn’t hit. Less than a minute in Khali hits the double handed chokeslam and the vice. HHH becomes the first guy to escape that hold but it’s not him hogging the spotlight. He’s smart enough to kick the knees out, which plays to his being the Cerebral Assassin. That makes sense, so shut up HHH haters. Ok, we’ve been in this two minutes and Khali has used his three signature moves. That makes sense. MASSIVE you can’t wrestle chant.

Khali busts out a leg drop, so obviously he can wrestle, since that guy was an in ring general. The crowd isn’t convinced though as the chant starts again. It might be the neck grip that he’s using that doesn’t really cause a lot of pain I wouldn’t think. HHH gets the facebuster to lock Khali in the ropes.

Nothing comes of it though as he’s out very fast. Pedigree try #2 doesn’t work either. HHH is smart again as he goes for the knees. That’s the best thing to do against a guy this massive. He uses the vice again as this is very back and forth. The Game forces the hands off but they’re right back on again, and it’s knee time. The third time on the Pedigree works and HHH wins.

Rating: B+. Now a lot of people are going to say this match sucks, but I disagree. This is probably Khali’s best match ever, and I think a lot of the credit for that should go to HHH. The idea here was that HHH just had to survive until he could hit his one big home run move.

Once he got that the match was going to be over and that’s exactly what happened. That makes perfect sense. The whole match was about him trying to hit the Pedigree and when he did it won the match. What more can you ask for out of something like this? There’s only so much you can do with Khali, so they did the best they could, and it worked out very well to me.

We get the recap of Cena vs. Batista, which the more I think about it, the more I like the short buildup. This match was based on two titans clashing and that’s all there needed to be. Cena’s One Day promo is something I really like.

More or less what he says is that despite all the years of him being the supposed biggest thing in the company, Batista got all the accolades and that one day, they would have their showdown. When you hear Cena talk, you have to give him this: he admits he has faults, unlike someone like Hogan who just screams about how great he is. It’s nice to hear both sides of it for a change.

John Cena vs. Batista

Big staredown before the bell and it’s on. This definitely has the big fight atmosphere and it’s working perfectly. You may no like either guy but you can’t argue that this is the biggest match the company had for a long time. Seeing this as one of the main events at Wrestlemania is still just awesome looking. Batista Bomb is avoided early as it’s kind of a long feeling out process to start.

Release fisherman’s suplex gets two for Cena as I have a feeling a strong style is coming. Side slam by Batista gets two. FU is blocked and Big Dave goes for the knee. Batista gets a figure four as the fans all go WOO as you would think two people just kissed on a sitcom. After a rope is grabbed Cena hits the FU on Batista but it’s over the top rope so we kind of hit a break.

Here come the shoulders and the Protoplex sets up the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Since it’s a freaking punch though Big Dave pops up and kicks Cena’s head off so that both guys are down. Big spinebuster by Batista but the Batista Bomb is countered into the STFU that has ZERO pressure on the neck or upper body at first. The fans boo the heck out of this.

The positioning of the knee in this hold is always freaky looking to me and looks horrendous every time. A rope is almost grabbed but Cena pulls them back to the center. He’s been in it nearly a full minute now but FINALLY the rope is grabbed. FU is blocked again into a rear naked choke of all things by the Animal. The good thing here is you get a closeup of the arm and it’s not fully on so there is a legit reason for Cena not dying.

After elbows get Cena out of the hold a BIG OLD SPEAR puts him down. Sometimes there’s nothing better than a big old tackle. Batista goes for a powerslam but Cena counters like people counter Tombstones into a BIG FU for a long two. Fans are WAY into this too.

Cena goes up top but Batista goes up too and we slug it out on the buckle. Nice place for the boo/yay spot. Cena shoves him off but goes for the leg drop into the powerbomb which more or less snapped his neck after it was already hurt and put him out for three months until the biggest shock in like ever as he was #30 in the Rumble. Somehow it gets two so Batista hits one of the biggest Batista Bombs ever ends this clean.

Rating: A. This was the super match that everyone wanted to see and it was a great one. Both guys were spot on to say the least. Batista gets an unfair reputation as being bad, but when it’s a big match, he brings it. The ending of this match was excellent, with neither guy being able to do it. I don’t like the strong style like that being used that often, but when it’s done right, it’s a thing of beauty.

The ending with Batista just losing it and beating Cena down until there was no way he was getting up was great as it plays up to the Animal theory. This was a showdown that lived up to the hype and left the door open for the Mania rematch that we know is coming one day. This loss does something else: it keeps Cena human.

He’s dominated everyone, but there’s one man that he just can’t beat: Batista. It gives him something to shoot for. He lost the Rumble to him in 2005 and he lost here as well. That’s a great touch indeed.

The poll results say that Vickie and Edge will divorce.

The Cell is lowered and the fans pop huge. This is the newer model of the cell which is less wide but taller, making it look more like a cell than a cage. We get the recap for the feud. It started with Taker going after the title and beating Edge at Mania. Edge cheated on his wife later on, resulting in her punishing him with the Cell match upon Taker’s return from suspension.

The title aspect of the feud was long over by this point, so this was a bit weird for a choice. Before the show though, Edge and Foley cut an in ring promo where Foley said that Edge wasn’t the same guy he used to be and that Edge would get killed if he didn’t change. It was probably the best promo of the year and was absolutely great to say the least.

Hell in a Cell: Undertaker vs. Edge

Both guys are well received, but of course Taker gets the mega pop as he’s beyond legendary status at this point. We start with a fistfight and of course Taker dominates. He hits a SWEET kick to the face to get a real advantage. Taker always gets insane out there and it’s great every time. His most famous moment has to be throwing Foley, so if nothing else consider that for his stuff in here.

They’re already on the floor and have spent more time there than they did in the ring. Stairs are brought into the ring so we’re going hardcore already. Taker hits Snake Eyes onto the stairs but Edge blocks it I guess as he really isn’t hurt by it. Spear is hit into the steps, (granted Taker is sitting up against them so it’s more like a running shoulder block) so they’re saying screw the thought process I guess.

Oh look it’s a table, so I guess this is the hardcore cell now? Another table is leaned against the cage. We have a double stack of tables on the floor. I’m curious to see how that’s going to work as there’s far less room between the cage and the ring than there used to be. Edge gets a chair so we’re up to three different weapons in less than ten minutes. At least they’re staying true to the original concept. I hate changes to a match like this.

You can hear the fans chanting Edge so even back then he had a lot of fans. It’ll be good for him to come back as a face. He’s a great heel, but it’s not going to kill him to change a bit. Sick chair shot to Taker as Edge is completely in control here, which I think I expected him to be. This isn’t your standard HIAC match yet though as it’s been more of a hardcore match in a cage, which I don’t think I like that much. And now we have a ladder.

They had a TLC match already, so I guess they need one in a cage too? We get a ton of weapons shots but it ends with Edge trying a conchairto that Taker just sits up and chokes him to escape and take back over. Back on the outside, Taker just kills Edge with the steps. The sound on this was just great. Edge of course is back on offense in about 8 seconds and he spears Taker through a section of the Cell which crashes down onto the table.

It wasn’t as cool as when Lashley did it to Umaga, but it certainly wasn’t bad. Now they’re on the floor in front of the cage. You know, I don’t remember if there’s ever been a Cell match that stayed in the cage. It’s almost a running joke. Again, there’s only so much I can make fun of here as it’s been an intense, well fought match. Edge runs across some tables and spears him through the ECW table which has replaced the Spanish Announcer Table as the destroyed furniture of choice.

Taker pops up of course and is now dominating. The no selling is getting to be very annoying now. They’re back in the cell now with Edge beating on him with the ladder as the Home Depot main event continues. We see Vickie and the remnants of La Familia, the worst stable in recent history, looking on. The commentators try to figure out if they’re happy or not. Well they’re not clapping their hands, so if they’re happy they don’t know it. Edge brings in a camera so maybe it’s a Staples match.

Taker avoids the spear and chokeslams Edge for a long two. Jim Ross must be the Chris Berman of wrestling with all of these annoying nicknames for people. Also, why does he have to keep referring to the cell like it has thoughts of its own? Is this a wrestling match or a Stephen King story? Edgecution which is called the Impaler, which needs to come back. It’s such a better move than the spear which a lot of people use and he’s not that good at it either.

Taker sets for the Last Ride through the double stack of tables on the outside but takes a spear instead. They say that Taker has had more issues dealing with Edge than anyone else. I think Kane and Foley would disagree. Also the fact that he never beat Bret Hart could be a factor in there. Last Ride gets two. Ross gets the great line of Last Ride means Last Rites. If you thought I was being legit there, you need help.

Edge is pretty much dead at this point but he comes back long enough to hit an Edge-a-Matic on the stairs to make ANOTHER comeback out of the Tombstone. Ross points out that Taker isn’t standing. That’s another line that I don’t even need to make fun of. Edge tries Old School. Now, let’s count how many ways this is going to not work. Well, Taker chokeslamming him through the two tables outside would be the best way I guess, and that’s what he does.

Tazz says that Edge looks like he fell off of a building. Actually I’d say he looks like he got chokeslammed off of the top rope through two tables inside a Hell in a Cell cage by the Undertaker at Summerslam 2008, but keep in mind I’m not a professional. How many buildings do you know of that have tables stacked up on the ground outside of them? Back in the ring, Edge gets speared as Taker shows how you steal a move.

It was B+A while in special mode on No Mercy for those of you interested. He follows this up with a SICK camera shot to Edge’s head. Dang this is more of a slaughter than he should have gotten in the WZ Tournament this year. Conchairto is next, as Edge never should be able to wrestle again. The tombstones finishes this absolute massacre. La Familia is applauding. Taker walks up the aisle but turns around and comes back.

Ok, I’m not huge on Edge, but dang it let the man live. He gets the ladder which isn’t much taller than Taker is actually. He stands Edge up on it so it’s like he was climbing and fell asleep. Taker gets another ladder next to it as I’m not sure what he’s setting for. He chokeslams Edge through the ring to FINALLY end the show.

OR DOES HE???

Taker gets on his knees and raises his arms, as fire stars shooting out of the hole. JR says where Taker sent Edge. Oh man it why did they have to go there? Yeah, that hurt things a LOT.

Rating: A-. I’m not wild on the weapons in there. The idea of the Cell is to have it be enough to hurt people. More or less you had a TLC match in the cage, which both worked and didn’t work at the same time. On one hand, you had an incredibly violent match with a definitive winner of the feud in Taker, but you also had a lot of clutter in there.

I think the weapons could work but they just used FAR too many of them. The fire at the end was just stupid. So wait, Edge is there now? If so, then why was he back on TV a few months later completely fine? See why it makes NO FREAKING SENSE???

Overall Rating: A-. A very solid show here, as there’s just one bad match and one headscratcher in the double title match. Other than that, this is a very good show. Your two non title matches are both great, the world title matches are solid, and you have a solid segment.

The only thing I think that’s missing would be the match with Hardy and Henry. Why not have like 3 minutes worth instead of 30 seconds? Were they running so close to the time limit that they couldn’t spare two minutes or so? Either way, this was a great show and one of the better ones I’ve seen.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Monday Night Raw – May 23, 1994: Hit The Random Button On Trash Day

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 23, 1994
Location: Struthers Fieldhouse, Youngstown, Ohio
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Randy Savage, Vince McMahon

We’re thankfully onto a fresh taping cycle so maybe things can get a little bit better. It’s not like you can get much worse than what we’ve had in recent weeks so hopefully this is a step in the right direction. We are about a month away from the King of the Ring and that means more qualifying matches in the coming weeks. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s sumo match with Earthquake defeating Yokozuna. As a result, Yokozuna and Crush destroyed Earthquake on the Wrestlemania Revenge Tour, writing him out of the promotion. It also writes him out of tonight’s King of the Ring qualifying match, meaning Owen Hart needs a replacement.

Opening sequence.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Owen Hart vs. Doink The Clown

Doink has Dink with him. Owen jumps him to start but gets sent into the buckle for his efforts. That earns Doink a rake to the face paint and the belly to belly suplex makes it even worse. Doink fights back up and grabs a backdrop as Dink has to stand on the steps to see the match. With Owen sent outside, Dink gets in to dance a bit as the pandering is on a roll.

We hit the stall button for a bit and the WE WANT BRET chants have Owen even more annoyed. Back in and Owen gets him into the corner for some right hands, only to be sent outside. This time Dink offers a distraction, allowing Doink to catch Owen with a clothesline. That’s quite a heelish sequence for Doink but he was better when he was evil anyway. Owen finally gets smart by pulling Doink down by the leg and wrapping it around the post. We take a break and come back with Owen grabbing a chinlock to keep things slow.

Back up and Owen’s always good looking belly to belly gets two and we hit the camel clutch (not a Boston crab Vince). Doink fights up and takes him down for a breather, meaning it’s time for the comeback slugout. An overhead belly to belly gives Doink two for a change and a neckbreaker….gets no count as here is Jeff Jarrett to kidnap Dink. The distraction lets Owen grab a rollup for the pin at 12:33.

Rating: C. This was a decent match, as Owen kept getting frustrated by Doink and even needed some cheating to move on. I think they actually saw something in Doink, as Vince was trying to get “The Doinkster” over on commentary. Not exactly a classic, but Owen getting some time was always going to be worth a little something at worst.

It’s time for the King of the Ring Report, with Todd Pettengill explaining the tournament. I know this stuff is basic, but you’re going to have someone who doesn’t know how it works and this could hook them in. We run down the brackets and the remaining qualifying matches (including Tatanka vs. Jimmy Del Ray!) before moving on to the rest of the card. This includes Diesel talking about how Bret Hart was up against a monster. To put it mildly, Diesel is really, really bad at talking here as it sounds like he’s reciting lines and not very well at that.

The Headshrinkers are defending the Tag Team Titles against Yokozuna and Crush, plus Roddy Piper vs. Jerry Lawler because reasons. Roddy even stops training to talk about how he needs the fans to send money to the kids. Lawler called Piper Jurassic Park, but that’s the biggest film of all time so he’ll take that as a compliment. Piper couldn’t be less interested in this match if it was his time in WCW.

We get a WWF Unbelievable (ad campaign) video, with a loudmouth saying he can beat everyone up and then being more and more damaged. Come see the WWF abuse people?

Duke Droese vs. Barry Horowitz

This is Droese’s Raw debut and he shoves Barry around to start. There’s a hiptoss into a slam as this is feeling squashish. Another hiptoss has Savage wondering if Droese can do anything besides be big, fast, strong and wrestle. Barry manages a shot to the face of his own and gets in a middle rope ax handle. Droese’s arm is sent into the corner and the armbar goes on to make it worse. That’s broken up and it’s a spinebuster to plant Barry. A jumping elbow finishes for Droese at 2:57. Yeah, but he’s still a wrestling garbageman. This wasn’t going to work.

Here’s what the Wrestlemania Revenge Tour looks like. Jonathan Taylor Thomas from Home Improvement gets a cameo because….well because 1994 isn’t good. Also, we’re about three months removed from Wrestlemania. How much revenge do you need?

IRS vs. Gary Sabaugh

Sabaugh is a bit better known as the Italian Stallion from the NWA. The eternally sweaty IRS sends him outside to start as commentary talks about politics. An elbow to the face drops Sabaugh back inside and we hit the chinlock. A legdrop sets up another chinlock as the IRWIN chants begin. Commentary talks about basketball as the hammerlock keeps Sabaugh in trouble. IRS hits a butterfly suplex to set up a third chinlock, which shouldn’t happen in a twenty minute match, let alone a Raw match like this one. Back up and a hot shot cuts Sabaugh off and the Write Off (running clothesline) finishes at 4:12.

Rating: D-. Yes it’s a running clothesline and yes it’s called the Write Off. It isn’t like there is much else that you can expect from a wrestling tax agent, so just try to survive the match most weeks. IRS was pretty firmly hitting the extent of his usefulness at this point, meaning he was fine as a midcard heel. Just stop giving him so much time.

We look at Crush costing Lex Luger his King of the Ring qualifying match on Superstars. A brawl ensued.

It’s time for the King’s Court, with Jerry Lawler mocking Randy Savage, but even he isn’t as bad as Roddy Piper. For now though, here is Lex Luger as this week’s guest. The USA chants begin and WOW this place is small. It feels like a small high school gym and that’s not what you think of for Raw. How could you think this feels like Raw? This place is full! Anyway, Lawler talks about Luger’s bad luck at Wrestlemania, including his first Wrestlemania (where Luger won, as Lawler’s history seems off).

After threatening Lawler, Luger talks about how Crush cost him his King of the Ring chances and promises to damage him. Lawler doesn’t think Luger would say that to Crush’s face so here is Crush in person. His arm is in a sling though, and no one seems to have heard about it. Crush claims Luger jumped him from behind because Luger knows he can’t win face to face. He would totally take Luger out right now if he wasn’t hurt so Luger takes the jacket off.

Lawler says Luger wouldn’t hit an invalid, so Luger clotheslines Crush to the floor, revealing that the arm is fine. Luger was quite evil here, as he didn’t know for sure that Crush was faking it. Then again the feud was thrown together because Mr. Perfect is gone so this is as good as they could do on short notice.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Matt Hardy

It feels like a randomly generated match on a Wrestling Legends game. Ted DiBiase is on commentary as Volkoff hammers away on the mat and then catches Hardy on top. Forearms to the chest and a knee to the ribs has Hardy down again. Hardy gets in a few shots to the face but a kick to the ribs cuts him off. The Boston crab finishes for Volkoff at 2:32. Volkoff feels so out of place here, and not just because he needs a haircut.

Next week: Bret Hart is on the King’s Court, which has Lawler and Savage rather excited.

Overall Rating: D. They continue the awful path to the even worse King of the Ring and this is getting harder to watch. The wrestling isn’t good and the character stuff is downright awful, with stuff like the garbageman, Volkoff in 1994 and Doink as a good guy all combining to make the shot terrible. I’m looking forward to wrapping this month up because it really is that bad these days.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2005 (2013 Redo): The Weirdest Ladder Match Ever

Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

Tonight is the first show in a long time with a special attraction main event. Tonight’s main event is the returning Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels in a match billed as legend vs. icon. Other than that we have the first Summerslam with the new generation on top with John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and Batista defending against JBL. Let’s get to it.

The Navy color guard presents the flag and Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem. She may stumble over a lot of announcements but she can sing the heck out of that song.

The opening video is about Cena vs. Bischoff with Eric’s surrogate Chris Jericho. This would be the 185th attempt to recreate Austin vs. Vince, each one less successful than the previous. It covers the rest of the matches too, focusing on Hogan vs. Shawn of course. The theme song is Remedy by Seether so we have another good song this year.

Never mind as the main song that will be played in the arena is some stupid hip hop song.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan, the most worthless wrestler I can think of at the moment, is defending. He took the title from Cena of all people and defended it over the course of the summer. In some of the smartest booking you’ll ever see to open a show, Benoit shoves him into the corner, snaps off a German suplex and puts Jordan in the Crossface for the submission and the title in 25 seconds.

When a guy is so bad that you can’t trust Chris Benoit with him on live TV, this is the right move. Benoit would go on to show how fast the match was by timing how long it took him to do things like go to the bathroom or have a cup of coffee, each of which lasted longer than the match. Brilliant stuff here and the crowd is instantly on fire.

Vickie Guerrero, not yet a character, begs Eddie to calm down about Mysterio and Rey’s son Dominic. Eddie says Vickie doesn’t get it but she tries to talk him down. He interprets this as Vickie thinking he can’t beat Rey and throws her out.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Matt dated Lita in real life but Edge stole her away (both on screen and in real life) while Matt was out with a knee injury. Hardy was released from WWE while Edge and Lita became an on screen couple. This led to an AWESOME angle where Matt, who had been rehired VERY quietly, showed up on Raw and attacked Edge from behind. He did it again but was arrested, shouting that he’d be at Ring of Honor. Matt was finally brought back full time, setting up a white hot feud with Edge. They made the feud feel as real as any I can remember in a long time before it was to a degree.

Edge vs. Matt Hardy

This is during Lita’s ultra slutty phase and DANG does it work for her. The fight starts on the floor with Matt in control before heading inside for a bell. Hardy grabs a choke but Edge gets into the ropes. Back to the floor for a bit before Edge gets in a right hand inside to take over. Edge spears him off the apron and out to the floor in the spot made much more famous against Mick Foley.

Back in and Matt hits some HARD lefts and rights before going into the corner to rain them down. Edge steps forward and drops Matt face first on the post (with Matt clearly pulling himself forward to hit it correctly), busting Hardy open. Edge goes after the cut….and the match is stopped in less than five minutes. We get a good shot of Matt’s head and the cut is shown to be just a step above nothing, making this ridiculous. I’m guessing the idea was due to a head injury (not a real one mind you) but it makes Matt look like a complete joke.

Rating: C+. This was fun while it lasted but the length and ending crippled it. Matt was on fire coming in but he would be made to look like the jobbiest jobber of all time during the feud with Edge. Eventually Edge would send him to Raw and keep Lita, ultimately winning the world title in a few months. This was more or less it for Matt as far as being a big deal.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Oh this is a fun one. They were tag team champions in the spring but Eddie started to get paranoid that Rey was better than him. Rey beat him at Wrestlemania in a friendly match and Eddie was set off. He turned on Rey and started going after Rey’s 8 year old son Dominic.

Uncle Eddie said he had a story to tell Dominic but Rey kept stopping Eddie from telling it. They had a match at Great American Bash where if Eddie won he could tell the story but if not he had to stay quiet. Eddie lost, but told the story anyway: he’s Dominic’s actual father but gave him to Rey because Eddie was in no condition to be a father. Then he wanted custody of Dominic, so there was one solution.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Here’s the solution: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” That line summed up the entire feud and is a famous line today. Eddie looks at Rey to start before kneeing him in the ribs to get things going. A hard belly to back suplex puts Rey down but he comes back with a monkey flip to send Guerrero to the floor. Rey is sent straight into the steps and then the ladder as Eddie maintains his early control.

Eddie slides in the ladder and goes up but a springboard dropkick takes Guerrero down. Another ladder is brought in but Rey dropkicks it into Eddie, sending both the ladder and Guerrero to the floor. A great looking springboard seated senton takes Eddie down but Rey is too banged up to immediately climb. They slug it out on the ladder with Eddie taking over but they botch the first big spot of the match: Eddie tries a sunset bomb but Rey falls off a second late, meaning he falls on Eddie instead of with him.

Back up and the ladder crushes Rey in the corner before Eddie brings in a second ladder. Rey is sandwiched between the ladders so Eddie can hit a slingshot hilo in a painful looking spot. Guerrero goes up but Rey sets the other ladder up like a ramp to get to the top. Eddie is backdropped onto the ladder ramp, sending both ladders and both wrestlers crashing down to the mat. Rey goes up one more time but has the ladder dropkicked out from under him in the second crash in 90 seconds.

Eddie lays a ladder on the top rope and drops a charging Rey chest first onto the steel. Guerrero goes up but Dominic gets in and shakes the ladder to stop him. Eddie gets in his face and shouts that he’s the new daddy but Rey stops him from punching the kid. Mysterio moves the ladder against the ropes and sends Eddie into it for the 619. Rey Drops the Dime on the ladder onto Eddie and goes up but gets caught in an electric chair. As they’re about to fall, Rey spins around and slips down Guerrero into a powerbomb.

Rey slowly climbs again but Guerrero kicks the ladder away and catches the falling Rey in another powerbomb. In a smart move, Eddie puts the ladder over Rey before climbing up and grabbing the briefcase. Since he’s a heel in a ladder match though, he takes FOREVER to work the simple clip, allowing Rey to kick the ladder over and pull Eddie down. Rey can’t follow up though and gets caught in Three Amigos with the third on the ladder. Eddie goes up again and here’s Vickie, which makes me think the slow climb was a missed spot where she was supposed to come out. She shoves him down and Rey gets up the ladder for the win.

Rating: B-. This was good but the botches hurt it a lot. The other major problem here is the whole thing is so silly. It’s really hard to get into a match with the prize being a custody of a kid. Are we supposed to believe that Eddie is going to win and presumably abuse the world’s stupidest looking eight year old? I’ve seen far worse but this wasn’t a great match by any stretch. Eddie of course would be gone in about two and a half months but he would beat Rey in a cage match in about ten days.

Rey hits Guerrero with the briefcase post match.

Jericho says the time is now for him to become WWE Champion. After Cena loses tonight, he’s nothing more than the flavor of the month. I mean, Jericho beat Rock and Austin in one night to become the first Undisputed Champion. Tonight Jericho will win the WWE Championship and Eric Bischoff can have a champion to be proud of.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

Yep he’s still around. This is for Angle’s gold medal and Eugene has Christy Hemme as a cheerleader. Eugene won some Olympic challenge by lasting three minutes against Angle, so this is no time limit. They really couldn’t find something better for Kurt? Angle easily takes him to the mat to start but Eugene comes back with a spinebuster to LOUD booing. Angle takes his head off on the People’s Elbow attempt for two and the fans go nuts. A BIG release German suplex puts Angle down and it’s time for some knees to the face.

Kurt sends him into the buckle but Eugene Hulks Up and does his goofy punching and a Rock Bottom for two. A Stunner gets the same and Eugene is pulls invisible straps down to set up an ankle lock on Angle. Kurt easily gets up and hits the Angle Slam followed by the ankle lock for the submission.

Rating: D. They booked a five minute squash at Summerslam for KURT ANGLE??? Seriously? This was a horribly dull match and Eugene had no business being in there. He barely even does anything with his gimmick anymore and is really just Hacksaw Jim Duggan minus the patriotism. Thankfully Kurt would move on to face Cena for three months straight after this.

Angle stands on a chair and has the medal placed around his neck.

The Divas are in bikinis and washing a limo. It has the Presidential logo on the door and Vince comes out. “Hey, why not?” THANKFULLY this went nowhere.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Wrestlemania rematch and I think that’s all you need to know. Orton immediately bails to the floor before being slapped right in the face. Taker misses a right hand in the corner but runs Orton over with a shoulder block. Off to a headlock on Randy followed by a big boot, leaving Orton with a dazed look in his eyes. Taker grabs a key lock but Orton armdrags him off the top to break up Old School. Orton hits a HARD right hand to the face, earning him a launch into the corner and rapid punches from the dead man.

Orton gets up a boot in the corner but charges out straight into a big boot for two. The jumping clothesline puts Orton down for two more and a running knee in the corner has Randy in big trouble. Randy manages to dodge a running big boot in the corner but can barely follow up due to the beating he’s taken. As Taker gets back in from the apron Orton gets in a shot to the leg to take over.

Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and wraps it around the post before putting on a basic leg lock in the ring. A knee drop to the face gets two before Orton takes him into the corner to wrap the leg around the ropes. Randy powerslams him down for two and it’s off to a leg lace. Taker fights out of it and rams Orton’s knee into the mat but Randy comes right back with a chop block to the front of the leg. More cannonballs onto the knee have Taker in bigger trouble but the big man kicks him out to the floor.

The legdrop across the apron has Orton in more trouble and Taker does a one legged Old School. Uh Dead Man, there’s more to selling than just limping before you do a move with no issues. Taker hits Snake Eyes but he can’t run fast enough for the big boot, allowing Orton to dropkick him down. The RKO is countered but Taker has the tombstone countered twice and Orton hits his backbreaker for two. Taker rolls through a high cross body and hits the chokeslam but a “fan” comes in and the distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the pin. It’s Bob Orton (Randy’s dad) of course.

Rating: C+. This was ok but the ending was stupid. It doesn’t hold a candle to their Wrestlemania match but the rematch inside the Cell at Armageddon was WAY better. Bob Orton didn’t add much to this feud and Orton wasn’t ready to make the jump to the full time main event scene just yet. The match wasn’t bad or anything though.

Some big shot Republicans are here.

We recap Jericho vs. Cena. As mentioned there isn’t much to talk about here. Bischoff doesn’t like Cena and has Jericho to take the title away from him. This is Cena’s first feud as champion on Raw. This gets the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. John Cena

They stare each other down to start before trading chops to Jericho’s advantage. A snap suplex puts Cena down but Jericho’s springboard cross body misses Cena entirely and Chris hits the floor. Back in and Cena hits a running elbow into the face but charges into a dropkick to slow things down again. A suplex gets two for the challenger and he follows it up with a dropkick to the jaw. Jericho sends him out to the floor and dropkicks him off the apron for good measure.

Cena gets choked with a microphone cord before being thrown inside to be beaten up even more. A superplex has Cena in trouble but it shook Jericho up too badly to cover. Cena starts pounding back but misses a flying shoulder, allowing Jericho to try the Walls, only to be kicked out to the floor. As Jericho gets back in, Cena drops a top rope leg onto Chris’ head for a close two count. The FU is countered into a DDT and both guys are down.

The fans are split here as Jericho chokes away on the ropes. Cena is in trouble but he comes back with a HARD clothesline to put both guys down again. They slug it out with Cena taking over and hitting his usual finishing sequence, including the spinning powerbomb but as he loads up the Five Knuckle Shuffle, Jericho counters into the Walls. After a long crawl, Cena finally makes it to the rope to escape. A belly to back superplex gets two for Jericho but as they get back up, he charges right into the FU to retain the title for Cena.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t bad here but it didn’t really click for the most part. This was an off time for Jericho as he didn’t fit as a heel because he was more or less the same guy he had always been but he was supposed to be bad now. Cena was starting to click as a main event guy though and that’s a really good sign, but the feud with Bischoff didn’t do anything for him as everyone saw it for what it was.

Chicago gets Wrestlemania 22.

We recap JBL vs. Batista. Basically it was supposed to be Muhammad Hassan taking the title off Big Dave but there was the whole terrorist angle (Hassan had terrorist looking guys attack Undertaker on the same day as the 7/7 London bombings and the backlash got Hassan released) so JBL was thrown in. This is a rematch after the Great American Bash where JBL won by DQ, so tonight it’s no holds barred.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL dollars rain from the sky before we get going. The fight starts in the aisle and a belt shot to the head has JBL in trouble. They head over to some of the equipment with JBL being sent into various metal objects. Batista is whipped into a steel case and they brawl through the crowd to ringside where the champion spears JBL through the barricade. A dazed Batista is sent into the post and we finally get inside the ring.

JBL pounds him down into the corner and whips Batista with the timekeeper’s belt. The choke with the belt goes on longer than any human would be alive but Batista fights out and whips JBL with the belt as well. Batista hits the corner shoulders but charges into a boot and JBL’s Clothesline is good for two. JBL brings in the steps and loads up a powerbomb off of them, only to be backdropped down instead. Batista hits the spinebuster and the Batista Bomb but he doesn’t cover. Instead he picks up JBL again and powerbombs him onto the steps for the emphatic pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much at all and the ending was never in doubt. It’s just over nine minutes and about a minute of that was spent on JBL choking Big Dave. JBL was the main event jobber at this point which meant he was ok at best. Batista was still the biggest star in the company at this point but Cena was rising fast.

We recap Hogan vs. Michaels. Hogan was inducted into the Hall of Fame and the fans chanted one more match. HBK was dealing with Muhammad Hassan and Daivari and begged Hogan to join him for one more match. They teamed up for the win at Backlash and became a semi-regular tag team until the 4th of July when Shawn superkicked Hogan after a win. Shawn accused Hogan of living off a reputation for twenty years, setting up a showdown here tonight. Shawn turned heel for the build because goodness knows Hogan isn’t getting booed on his nostalgia tour.

Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan

Michaels cools his heels on the floor before the bell as the fans are way into this. Hogan easily wins the first lockup and shoves Shawn down a few more times. The fans tell Shawn that he screwed Bret as he hooks a headlock to take over for a few moments. A hard shoulder block puts Shawn on the floor and Michaels stalls again. Back in and Shawn chops away before being whipped onto the top rope for some punts to the ribs. Shawn is crotched on the top and punched in the face for his efforts.

Michaels finally wises up and thumbs Hulk in the eye, only to have Hogan come back with a backdrop. Hogan sends him to the floor and launches him back inside before walking into some right hands and chops. Then comes the mistake as Shawn slaps him in the face, cuing the Hulk Up. Shawn slaps him again….and it seems to work. He fires off more chops but gets sent into the corner for the Flair Flip and a big right hand to send Shawn to the floor.

Hogan drops him on the announce table and pounds away with those “ham-like” right hands. Shawn is posted but Hogan breaks the count at nine. Hogan tries to ram him in again but Shawn slips off and posts Hulk instead. The bald one is cut open and Shawn pounds away at the cut. They fall to the mat with Shawn staying on the assault and the cut being in such a goofy straight line that you almost have to chuckle.

Off to a sleeper with Hogan’s blood GUSHING onto Shawn’s arm. Hogan’s arm only drops twice and he comes out of it with a belly to back suplex. Both guys are down and Hogan looks very confused. Back up and there’s the forearm into the nipup but the big elbow misses. There’s the finger point but another forearm breaks up the big boot. The referee is bumped though just before Shawn nips up again. Shawn goes to the wrong corner for the elbow so instead he puts Hogan in the Sharpshooter as a second referee slides in.

The hold stays on for a LONG time but Shawn has it on so badly that it’s easily believed. Hogan makes the rope so Shawn loads it up again, only to be kicked off and into another referee. With no referee, Shawn hits Hogan low and grabs a chair. A bad looking shot to the head puts Hogan down and there’s the big elbow. It didn’t work for Savage in 89 and it’s not going to work here. Sweet Chin Music gets two and I think you can fill in the blanks here. One Hulk Up, big boot (with infamous overselling that would make Rock say “DUDE tone it WAY down) and a legdrop later and we’re done.

Rating: C-. This is your standard Hogan match but that’s not exactly the best thing to see in 2005. It’s a cool idea for a match in theory but it didn’t quite hold up in actuality. Shawn had to tone his main event style WAY down to let Hogan keep up with him and it was all nostalgia after that. I’m ok with the booking here as Shawn didn’t need the win at all and was the guy to put over everyone in his return so putting over Hogan is fine. The match is worth seeing for historical significance but not much more.

Shawn and Hogan make up and massive posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a hard one to grade as it’s not exactly a bad show, but there’s nothing here that you should go out of your way to see at all. This was a bad time for the company as they were in a big transition to the new stuff but the new guys weren’t ready yet. That leaves an uninteresting show with matches that were easy to predict. It’s not terrible by any means and there are FAR worse shows out there, but this isn’t worth seeing other than the main event for history.

Ratings Comparison

Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B

Redo: B-

Kurt Angle vs. Eugene

Original: A+

Redo: D

Randy Orton vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

Redo: C+

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Original: C

Redo: C

Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: D

Redo: D+

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

The Eugene match was because I liked seeing Eugene get beaten up. The overall rating doesn’t even make bad sense.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/08/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2005-shawn-vs-hogan-and-cena-vs-batista/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.