Smackdown – October 27, 2006: The Big Fight Tag

Smackdown
Date: October 27, 2006
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re on the way to Cyber Sunday, but that only means something for a few people on this show. Other than that we are starting the build towards Survivor Series, or at least we should be pretty soon. I’m not sure what to expect from this show but the main events have been pretty big as of late. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s a ticked off Batista to get things going. He talks about winning the World Title at Wrestlemania XXI but then being forced to vacate it due to an injury. Since then, all he has wanted to do is get his title back but an Irish thorn has been a pain in his neck so he wants Finlay out here right now.

Instead here are Paul Heyman and his security, with Heyman recapping tonight’s main event of John Cena/Batista vs. Big Show/King Booker. Heyman points out that Batista is the lone non-champion, which does it sit well with Batista. That sends Heyman into a speech about why Batista should be a champion because he looks and acts like one. Teddy Long is holding him back, even though these people don’t care about him. Heyman cares about him though and would love to have him in ECW.

Batista says that’s a nice offer and asks for some time to think about it. That’s fine of course, but Batista turns it down before Heyman can get out of the ring. The brawl is on but here are Big Show and King Booker to beat Batista down. John Cena runs in for the save and the good guys clear the ring in a hurry.

Wrestlers talk about whether John Cena or the Marine is tougher. That’s three times for this segment this week.

William Regal/Dave Taylor vs. Bobby Lashley/Tatanka

Tatanka shoulders and clotheslines Regal down to start and hands it off to Lashley, who charges into a knee in the corner. Taylor comes in for a few quick shots but charges into a boot to the face. The tag brings in Tatanka and everything breaks down. Lashley gets sent outside and Regal grabs a rollup with his feet on the ropes and Taylor pushing a bit for the pin. Tatanka tore his meniscus at some point in there so he might be gone for a bit.

Post match Tatanka beats up the referee and decks Lashley with a right hand, followed by a low blow.

Chris Benoit is asked about possibly facing Umaga at Cyber Sunday but goes over to see Vickie Guerrero. He asks what is going on with her and Chavo Guerrero and what they did to Rey Mysterio. Vickie accuses Benoit of using Eddie to further his career because they weren’t as close as he thought they were.

MVP claims an intestinal virus to keep him out of a No DQ match with Kane. Mr. Kennedy comes in and says he wants to face Undertaker tonight. Long says Kennedy knows Undertaker isn’t here tonight so he can replace MVP in the No DQ match against Kane.

We recap King Booker and Big Show attacking John Cena on Raw, followed by Booker taking out Big Show.

Chavo Guerrero tells Vickie Guerrero to be careful around Chris Benoit and to keep her friends close and enemies closer.

Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title and yes we’re doing this again. Helms takes him down and pounds away to start but Matt is right back up with a running clothesline into the corner. A bulldog out of said corner gets two but Helms shoves him off the apron for a clothesline on the floor. Back in and Helms chokes on the rope to set up the chinlock for a bit. Matt fights up again and hits the Side Effect for two. The Twist of Fate is loaded up but Helms reverses into a rollup and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: C. It was a quick match and little more than that, which is not exactly something I needed to see. These two have fought a few times now and while the match at No Mercy was rather good, there was nothing to this one which made me want to see it keep going. Hopefully this is it because there isn’t much else left to see from them.

Ashley, in a fairy costume for later, comes in to ask Paul London and Brian Kendrick’s opinion on her costume. London is disappointed because she stole it from him. Kendrick thinks she looks great and the three of them are heading out later. Ashley leaves and the guys lose it.

Ad for Controversy Creates Cash.

Kane vs. Mr. Kennedy

No DQ. Kane slugs away to start and hammers away in the corner as JBL jumps on Cole for accidentally saying Victoria’s Secret instead of….whatever he was trying to say. A suplex plants Kennedy for two and there’s a hard clothesline to put him down again. Kennedy ducks a big boot though and Kennedy hammers away to little avail. They head outside with Kennedy whipping him into the steps and uses a chair on the knee.

Another hard chair to the knee rocks Kane and Kennedy wraps the knee around the ropes for a running kick back inside. Kane gets in a few uppercuts though and a hard clothesline out of the corner drops Kennedy. A one armed side slam does it again but here’s MVP to break up the top rope clothesline. Kane beats both of them up but MVP chairs the knee out so Kennedy can steal the pin.

Rating: C+. This worked out fairly well and Kennedy continues to build up momentum with one win over a big name after another. Kane was basically in a handicap match here and I think you know where this is going. That should work out well, and a match against Undertaker and Kane should be a nice rub for the young guys.

John Cena comes in to see Batista before the tag match and Batista mocks the You Can’t See Me. That’s not good enough for Cena, who gets in Batista’s face about how it is war out there so take this seriously. Cena wants some heart and Batista buys into the idea.

Here are Chavo and Vickie Guerrero for a chat. Chavo talks about how the family finally have some peace in their lives. A fan says they suck but Chavo says Guerreros don’t suck. They are glad to be rid of Rey Mysterio and let’s look at him saying I QUIT again. Then we watch it again just to make the point clear. Make it three times because Chavo could watch it all day long. There’s the fourth time but as he calls for the fifth, here is Chris Benoit instead. The Guerreros bail before anything can be said.

Video on the tour of the Philippines.

Here is Teddy Long for a chat. He saw what happened in the previous match so next week it is Kane/Undertaker vs. MVP/Mr. Kennedy. As for tonight, it’s a Divas Battle Royal.

Battle Royal

Jillian Hall is Elvis, Michelle McCool is a nurse, Kristal is a gold miner (or digger more than likely), Ashley is a fairy and Layla is a bunny. Before the bell, cue the Miz to make himself referee and we’re ready to go. We’re down to Kristal vs. Layla in less than a minute with Layla taking over. Kristal puts her on the apron though and Miz pulls her out for the win. This certainly existed as a way to get the women in their outfits and out of the ring in a hurry.

Post break, Miz is in the ring with Kristal to celebrate the win but here’s the returning Boogeyman. Miz shoves Kristal at him and the worms are back.

We recap Tatanka snapping.

Big Show and King Booker bicker over who is better but agree to work together tonight.

The Marine is still a thing.

King Booker/Big Show vs. John Cena/Batista

Cena and Booker get things going with Batista applauding from the apron. Batista comes in and gets in a few shots of his own, followed by some choking in the corner. It’s already back to Cena and a double clothesline drops Booker again. We take a break and come back with Cena coming in to slug away at Booker but Show comes in to run him over. Booker adds some kicks to the ribs and there’s Show’s headbutt for a bonus.

Cena clotheslines Booker but gets knocked over the top in a hurry. The sleeper goes on to keep Cena in trouble but he reverses into the ProtoBomb. Booker goes for the tag….and Show walks off to make up for Raw. The hot tag brings in Batista and it’s time to clean house. The shoulders in the corner set up the running powerslam to plant Booker. Cena comes in for most of his finishing sequence, followed by the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a nice enough main event tag team match and that is all it needed to be. What mattered here was getting in some tension between Booker and Batista, which worked out well enough. You don’t need to do anything more than what makes sense at times and that is exactly what went down here. Nice match, and Cyber Sunday gets a boost.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty nice show here for the most part and there is nothing wrong with that. Having Big Show and John Cena as guest stars is helping to prop the show up but the good sign is that they are also building for the future. Mr. Kennedy and MVP are looking strong and Chavo is getting a nice push as well. I’m interested in where things are going and that has not been the case for a bit.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIX (2017 Redo): I Might Have Been Wrong

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

This one is very interesting as the TV leading up to the show has been a cross between boring and really bad, yet the show has one of the best reputations of all time. I’m really curious to see how it goes from such a bad build to such a great show, especially with so much emphasis on Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Morely and Storm are defending with Morely acting as the new champion due to William Regal being injured. The Dudleys are on the floor in forced servitude to Morely and Eric Bischoff. Van Dam kicks Morely out to the floor to start and it’s Kane diving onto the champs for a cool visual as we take a break. Back with the champs in control and Morely grabbing a chinlock. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two as the announcers rip on Morely. The Money Shot misses and it’s off to Kane for the house cleaning.

Storm breaks out of a chokeslam and gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. There’s the top rope clothesline for two with Morely making the save, only to eat a jumping kick to the face. The chokeslam looks to set up the Five Star but Rob comes inside before jumping to the top. Morely shoves him off, which makes me think there was some mistiming there. The distraction lets the Dudleys hit a 3D on Storm….and an elbow on Van Dam so the champs can retain the titles.

Rating: D+. That’s certainly how you warm a crowd up. If ever there was a time for an easy title change to give the fans something to cheer for, it should have been this right here. When you consider how soon Kane and Van Dam would get the titles anyway, this really seems like a big head scratcher.

The opening video shows wrestlers getting ready with a collection of voiceovers talking about how important this one night really is. This treats the event with a lot more respect and it’s quite the effective idea. It shows that everyone is in awe of the event itself and makes it feel even bigger.

And now, the theme song Crack Addict. So much for the respect part.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt, defending here and accompanied by Shannon Moore, is appearing in his fourth Wrestlemania and often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him. Mysterio is dressed like Daredevil, starting the awesome tradition of dressing like a superhero (most of the time) at Wrestlemania.

Matt is sent outside early on and Rey busts out a corkscrew dive to take both of them down. Rey can’t hit a sunset bomb to the floor so Matt drops him onto the barricade to take over. The Ricochet gets two as Tazz talks about Matt being off the banana juice and moving to tea. The Twist of Fate is countered into a rollup but Matt grabs the Side Effect for two. As Cole talks about loving latex and teabagging (seriously), Matt misses a charge into the post and Rey gets two off a crossbody.

Shannon breaks up the 619 though and now the Twist of Fate gets two. Splash Mountain is loaded up but Rey reverses with a hurricanrana for two more. Shannon makes the save so Rey takes him down before hitting the 619 on Matt. The West Coast Pop is broken up though and Matt grabs a rollup and the rope to retain.

Rating: C+. This was a good choice for an opener as you want something fast paced but don’t want to overstay your welcome. They were in and out in less than six minutes, which is pretty close to the sweet spot for an opener. Mysterio winning probably would have been the better option but at least he didn’t get the title a week later or something like that.

The Miller Lite Catfight Girls are here. I’m with Lance Storm: it’s nonsense that these two got time and the seven minute Tag Team Title match got stuck on Heat.

Nathan Jones was laid out earlier tonight.

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring. Again, Tag Team Titles on Heat in a short match but time for this.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

A-Train messes with Undertaker’s bike on the way to the ring. If I had a dollar for every time a hairy chested man with nipple piercings adjusted the mirror on my motorcycle….well I’d be poor as I don’t have a motorcycle but the rest happens more often than you would think. Show tries a sneak attack but gets sent to the floor so Undertaker can chokeslam A-Train for two.

Undertaker actually leapfrogs A-Train and drops him with Old School as they’re certainly moving in the early going. A Derailer cuts Undertaker off and Show posts him for good measure. It’s off to Show whose chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara armbar. A-Train’s save is countered into a cross armbreaker so Show gets to make a save of his own. We hit an abdominal stretch as Cole wants to know if Undertaker’s stamina is going to hold up after such a long layoff due to injury. We’re four minutes into the match and Undertaker has been back from injury for almost TWO AND A HALF MONTHS Cole, you pathetic nitwit.

A-Train puts on an abdominal stretch of his own and Tazz shows how to do his job by suggesting things Undertaker should do to escape/relieve the pressure. I get that they have different jobs but at least Tazz is saying stuff that makes sense and doesn’t sound stupid. A-Train talks trash and throws some punches until Undertaker mostly misses the running DDT (he was barely touching A-Train).

Running corner clotheslines have the monsters in trouble until A-Train gets in the bicycle kick. Show hits his chokeslam but here’s Nathan Jones in the aisle to kick Show’s head off. A-Train takes a big boot from Jones (because the referee doesn’t understand disqualifications) and the Tombstone is enough for the pin.

Rating: C-. Actually not a bad power match here as I can buy the idea of Undertaker holding his own against these two for eight minutes, especially after he’s shown he can beat them both on his own. The fact that Jones couldn’t even be trusted to wait for people to run into his kicks is incredibly telling and pretty much spells the end of his career.

The Catfight Girls meet Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson, who are standing around looking at Torrie’s Playboy. As various gorgeous women just do. Stacy has a new marketing campaign idea for them and they all leave together.

We take a quick look at the Tag Team Title match from Heat. Add this to the stuff that could have been cut in exchange of just airing the match.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Victoria is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Jazz jumps the champ from behind to start fast and it’s already time for a modified Muta Lock on Trish. Trish gets knocked outside as Lawler thinks this should turn into a love triangle. Back in and Victoria hits her slingshot legdrop for two on Trish but has to powerslam Jazz for two.

It’s back to Trish as JR tries to figure out why King called her a quarter among pennies. A sitout powerslam gives Jazz two on Trish but it’s time for a fight with her fellow villain. Jazz kicks Victoria down but gets rolled up for two, followed by the Chick Kick for the same. Victoria gets sent outside, leaving Trish to get caught in the STF.

With Victoria distracting the referee, Richards breaks up the hold so Victoria and Trish can trade rollups (with Victoria’s tights being pulled rather low) for two each. Jazz gets knocked outside, leaving Richards to swing a chair but hit the top rope and knock it back into his own head. The Chick Kick to Victoria gives Trish the title back at 7:18.

Rating: C. Not bad at all here as they kept things tight and had everyone moving the entire time, including Richards with the chair to his own head. It made Trish look like the one who survived until the end, though at some point she’s going to have to beat Jazz. You can do that later though as this was all about getting her the title and I’d prefer her to pin the champ than the other challenger.

Rock doesn’t want to hear about the people because they’ve been booing him and calling him a sellout. It’s true that he’s a sellout because he sells out every Wrestlemania he’s in. Rock has lost to Austin twice at Wrestlemania but Hollywood has taught him that the third act is all that matters.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Team Angle

Team Angle is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. The challenging team both beat on a champ until it settles down to Chavo vs. Haas. A dropkick puts Charlie down and it’s off to Benoit, who runs into an armdrag from Guerrero. Eddie comes in with the slingshot hilo but they ram heads for a double knockdown.

Benoit brings Rhyno in to powerslam Eddie and it’s already off to Benjamin as they’re keeping the pace fast here. A double dropkick gets two on Rhyno but Haas gets taken into the Rhyno corner for a double stomping. Eddie stomps on Rhyno and gets taken into the same corner that Haas got caught in. Benoit catches Eddie on the top with a superplex for two as Benjamin makes the save.

That’s fine with Chris who throws Eddie into the air and pulls him down into the Crossface for a sweet move but Haas makes a save this time. Chavo and Haas come in and everything breaks down. The rolling German suplexes have Chavo in trouble but Benoit walks into a superkick from Benjamin. A legdrop gets two with Eddie dropping a frog splash for the save. Haas suplexes Chavo but turns into the Gore. Chavo eats one as well, only to have Benjamin steal the pin to retain the titles at 8:46.

Rating: B-. I don’t remember liking this one this much but they didn’t stop for the entire match. Benoit and Rhyno are still an odd choice for a tag team but it wouldn’t surprise me if they were setting up for Benoit and Edge in this spot before he got hurt. Team Angle needed this win and that’s the right call out of the three options.

Torrie and Stacy get in a fight over whether Vince or Hulk created Wrestlemania. The Catfight Girls do the same (though one of them keeps calling him Holgan) and agree to settle this in bed.

King is mesmerized.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho. Chris seems jealous that Shawn is back and getting attention. He’s wanted to be the next Shawn Michaels but now he wants to be the first Chris Jericho by defeating Shawn at Wrestlemania. This has been a long build but they’ve been smart to wait until here for the match. Shawn accepted the challenge with a superkick and telling Jericho that he would see him at Wrestlemania in a moment I always liked.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn tries to fire some confetti cannons on the way to the ring but some of them fail to go off, prompting an “eh what are you going to do” look. Jericho on the other hand just looks down at him in disdain in the perfect response. Some early armdrags frustrate Jericho so Shawn lounges on the top rope.

Back up and Shawn kicks him away without too much effort as they’re still firmly in first gear. Jericho is ready for a leapfrog and slaps Shawn in the face, earning himself a right hand to the jaw and a trip to the floor. Back in and Jericho scores with a spinwheel kick but a bulldog is countered with a good crotching. We hit a random Figure Four but Jericho reverses pretty quickly.

They head outside again with Shawn hitting a nice plancha, only to get caught in the Walls in the aisle. The bad back is sent into the post as Jericho has a big target to work with now. Back in and Jericho yells about how he’s better than Shawn as he stays on the back in a variety of ways. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back before Shawn grabs a DDT to get him out of trouble.

Jericho nips up and hits the forearm into Shawn’s pose, which you just don’t do at Wrestlemania. Shawn makes his comeback (with two nipups of his own) and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence (as required by a classic like this) for a couple of twos each. Jericho is Lionsault for two more before countering a hurricanrana into the Walls. Shawn grabs the rope so Jericho elbows him in the jaw and tunes up the band.

Sweet Chin Music puts Shawn down for two and the fans seemed to buy that as the finish. Shawn teases the Walls but goes with a catapult into the post for two instead. It’s Jericho up first with a belly to back superplex but Shawn reverses into a crossbody in mid-air for yet another near fall.

The top rope elbow gets the same but the real Sweet Chin Music is countered into the Walls again. Just like last time, Shawn grabs the ropes though this time he follows up with more Chin Music for a very delayed two. Both guys are spent so Jericho grabs a belly to back suplex, only to have Shawn flip over and grab a rollup with his legs for the pin at 22:31.

Rating: A. Oh come on like this one needs an explanation. These two were both on fire here and just had an awesome match. It’s the match that made it clear Shawn had more than just a few performances in him as he felt a lot more like the older version here, which is exactly what the match needed to be. Jericho being able to do every athletic thing Shawn could do but not be able to outsmart him is a perfect story in a similar vein to Shawn vs. Shelton Benjamin a few years later. Great match here and one of the best Shawn had in his comeback.

They hug post match but Jericho kicks him low like the heel he is.

The evil referee from Montreal goes to see Vince.

The new attendance record is announced.

Limp Bizkit takes their sweet time performing Crack Addict.

Here are the Catfight Girls to fight on a bed set up on stage. Cue Stacy and Torrie to join in. Girls are stripped, pillows are swung and Coach is pantsed and pinned. Again, World Tag Team Titles not on the show but these girls get like four segments.

We recap HHH vs. Booker T. which focuses on Booker’s criminal past. That’s firmly established before the “someone like you doesn’t deserve to be World Champion” line is made. It’s a better way to go about it but there’s no good way to spin that statement. Basically Booker is fighting for his one big moment and HHH is defending because….well because it’s Wrestlemania and what else is he supposed to do?

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T.

HHH is defending and comes out first for some reason. JR talks about Booker becoming a five time WCW Champion so King says that place was a joke. JR: “How long did you work there?” King: “Never.” JR: “Well I did.” King: “Was it a joke?” JR: “D*** right.” A hard lockup takes them into the corner where they trade chops and some right hands. Booker charges into a boot to the face and HHH goes up top, only to get armdragged down. You would think Flair would have taught him better but if Ric never learned, HHH didn’t need to either.

The announcers bicker over whether or not Booker was born on a pool table which turns into a discussion of Fink being drunk last night. Booker gets sent outside and goes into the steps as the pace slows a lot (yes, in a HHH match). A neckbreaker gets two on Booker and a spinebuster gets the same.

Booker slips out of a suplex and grabs a DDT for his first offense in a long time. The jumping knee and a facebuster cut Booker off but he comes back with a spinebuster. HHH goes up again for some reason and dives into a boot to the face. Seriously they never learn. The scissors kick only hits ropes and Booker falls out to the floor as he was getting dangerously close to beating up HHH and that must be stopped.

Flair sends Booker’s knee into the steps and it’s time for an Indian Deathlock back inside as we flash back to 1974. Back up and the knee is done but Booker grabs a sunset flip for a fast two. A jumping elbow to the jaw puts HHH down again and there’s the ax kick for no cover.

Flair’s distraction has no effect as Booker hits the Houston Hangover, which thankfully isn’t followed up on because the knee gives out again. They stagger to their feet with Booker’s knee preventing him from trying another ax kick. Instead it’s the Pedigree, the completely ridiculous 24 second wait, and then the pin with one hand over Booker’s chest to retain the title at 18:44.

Rating: C+. And there goes Booker’s main event career for the next few years. Aside from being a somewhat boring match, that ending is unforgivable. There’s no reason to not give Booker the title here, even if it’s just until Backlash. The leg stuff at the end was better but this was WAY too much HHH with Booker only having a few hope spots here and there. He didn’t even get the big two count at any point. This was all about HHH establishing that he is the one and only star on Raw no matter what and that’s a major problem. Booker needed this win, or at least anything other than a clean loss.

Long recap of Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon for the show’s real main event. Basically Vince suddenly decided that he hated Hogan for leaving the company ten years ago and testifying against him in the steroids trial so they had to have a fight. This was suddenly elevated to the biggest match of all time despite there not really being a clear reason why Vince started hating Hogan in the first place. If it was mentioned at the start, it was completely bogged down in all the mess that followed. This is at worst the second biggest match on the show and while not surprising, that’s probably not the best idea in the world.

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight and if Hogan loses, he has to retire. Hogan “spears” Vince down because that’s the kind of thing Hogan is known to do. Some slow motion (expect to hear that a lot in this one) right hands have Vince in trouble and Hulk stomps him in the corner. A clothesline gives Vince a breather and he throws those awkward punches. Now it’s off to an armbar because that’s what you want to see from these two in a street fight.

Hogan fights out of the test of strength but Vince is smart enough to kick him in the gut. That’s so effective that they do it three straight times before Vince sends him outside. Hogan gets posted but still manages to avoid a chair shot. Instead it’s Hulk chairing Vince in the head and of course we’ve got some blood (you knew that was coming and you know it’s coming from Hulk too).

More chair shots have Vince reeling, though not enough to knock him out, because Vince is more manly than your average wrestler. Another chair shot hits the Spanish announcer in the head because this match needed additional casualties. Vince low blows him and gets in his own chair shot to draw Hogan’s blood as this is already dragging. And now…..it’s ladder time, which certainly picks things up a bit.

A monitor shot to the head puts Hogan on the table and Vince climbs up, puts his hand to his ear, and drops a leg (which doesn’t hit Hogan but it’s a great visual nonetheless) to destroy the table and freak the crowd out all over again. Vince throws Hogan inside and grabs a pipe from underneath the ring. In the visual of the match, Vince very slowly raises his bloody head over the apron and gives the kind of evil smile that only he can pull off. It’s a great shot too and makes up for a lot of this match.

Hogan hits him low to put both guys down….and here’s Roddy Piper, looking so out of shape that he makes Hogan look great. Piper teases hitting both of them before knocking Hogan out with the pipe (Why this is considered a surprise is beyond me. They’re mortal enemies whose feud was the reason for the first Wrestlemania main event. Why was him attacking Hogan ever in doubt?).

That’s only good for two so Vince beats up the referee, drawing out the evil referee from earlier in the night, along with a regular referee. Vince pipes Hogan again, giving us that flopping around like a fish selling. It’s Hulk Up time with Hulk beating up both Vince and the evil referee. The big boot and three legdrops finish Vince at 20:48.

Rating: C-. I’ve seen this match several times and it’s actually grown on me a lot. The expectations were through the floor coming in and it’s a pretty fun old people brawl. It’s dumb, goofy fun and while it’s WAY too long (you could easily cut eight minutes if not more), it’s one of those matches where you knew what you were getting and that’s exactly what was delivered. Vince’s complete over the top visuals made it even better. It’s not good of course but it’s fun, which is a lot more important for something like this.

Hogan poses as Shane comes out to check on his father. We get a staredown but Hogan seems to understand that he doesn’t have any issues with Shane.

You can already hear Cole’s voice giving out.

We recap Steve Austin vs. The Rock. This is ALL about Rock as Austin is on fumes and it’s not exactly a secret. Basically Rock is ticked off about being booed last year in Toronto and turned into the most amazing heel in the world as a result. The only thing he has left to do in his career is beat Austin at Wrestlemania and this is probably his last chance. This gets the music video treatment but it can only get so far when one person is doing 90% of the work in the feud (not really a criticism of Austin but Rock was just on another planet at this point).

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Writing that one never gets old. The camera follows Austin from behind in a pretty unique shot which works quite well. They stare each other down to start with Austin hitting the first right hands. The threat of a Stunner sends Rock bailing to the floor so Austin beats him over the announcers’ table and whips him into the steps.

Back in and Austin chokes a bit (that’s somewhat out of character) and gets two off a suplex. Rock gets in a chop block to get a breather with Austin bailing out to the floor. The kicks to the leg have Austin staggering around and Rock wraps the leg around the post. We hit the Sharpshooter with Austin fighting to the ropes as you can really feel the lack of fire in this one.

It’s intense but it’s clear that Austin doesn’t have that high gear anymore. The leg is wrapped around the post again and Rock grabs Austin’s vest. That’s too much for Austin so it’s some bad punches and a double clothesline for another breather. The Thesz press and middle finger elbow get two as Austin is getting some fire going.

A Rock Bottom gives Austin two but Rock comes back with a Stunner. Austin grabs the real thing for two more but Rock cuts him off with a low blow. The vest comes off and the People’s Elbow gets two. The Rock Bottom gets the same, followed by two more to FINALLY put Austin away at 17:55.

Rating: B+. I know there were outside circumstances (Austin spent the previous night in the hospital due to drinking too much alcohol and caffeine) but this would have felt so much bigger as the main event. It’s a very good match and feels big at times but when you have the history that these two have, nothing is going to live up to that standard.

Austin not being able to keep up with Rock was a great way to show that Rock was the better man that night and even with the fire not as hot as before, Austin is still worth seeing at any point. This is another one that’s grown on me and while it might not be as great, it felt important, which is what matters most here.

After thanking Austin for what happened (not audibly but he’s since said that’s what was he was doing), Rock leaves Austin for the big hero’s sendoff. This wasn’t billed as Austin’s farewell but it turned out to be his retirement match. It would have been a great way to close the show, but I get the idea of not wanting that to be the case if Austin couldn’t go. It’s a bit of a disappointment but at least he got the big moment.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock got cheated out of the title at Survivor Series and has gone on a path of destruction to get it back, including winning the Royal Rumble. Angle has used every possible way out of facing him but tonight he’s out of escapes and has nothing left to do but fight. The fact that his neck is being held together by paperclips and duct tape is just a detail because Angle has a low level of sanity. This feels like a major showdown, which is all you can ask for out of the main event of Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar, with bad ribs, is challenging and can win the title via DQ or countout. Angle grabs a front facelock but Brock throws him off and we’re back to a standoff. Kurt’s headlock has about the same effect but he breaks up Brock’s armbar. Lesnar grabs a powerslam, only to get caught in the first German suplex. Brock pops right to his feet though, sending Angle bailing to the floor as they’re not laying into each other just yet.

Back in and a gorilla press (Tazz: “The vanilla gorilla!”) plants Angle, who cuts off a charge with a boot. A German suplex into the corner messes with the ribs again and it’s off to something like an STF from the side. Angle lets go of the legs and switches to something closer to a Bank Statement. Brock won’t tap so Angle suplexes him with ease. That earns him a spinebuster though, which Angle is crazy to take with such a bad neck.

Brock hits his own suplexes but Angle pops up and rolls some German suplexes of his own. Neither finisher can hit so Angle trips him into the ankle lock. Brock grabs the rope….which doesn’t count for no apparent reason. Instead Angle switches to a half crab, followed by a running knee to the back. Brock backdrops him to the floor, again because Angle is freaking nuts.

Back in and the Angle Slam gets two, which Cole says has never happened before. I find that very hard to believe. The F5 gets two more but Kurt gets the ankle lock with a grapevine. Brock manages to drag him over to the ropes for the break, followed by another F5. Instead of covering though, Brock heads up top.

In one of the scariest moments in wrestling history, Brock tries a shooting star press (apparently suggested by Johnny Ace) but leaves it short, landing square on his head and knocking himself completely silly. With his eyes glazed over, Brock hits a third F5 for the pin and the title at 21:09.

Rating: A-. This started off rather slowly but then picked up the pace to become one heck of a hard hitting fight. Angle did everything he could with all the suplexes and left it all in the ring in what might have been his last match. Lesnar did everything he needed to do (save for hitting that shooting star) and if he had nailed the finish, this would go up several notches. It’s a great finish and the kind of main event that Smackdown should have put on at this point. Excellent match.

Lesnar is GONE as he tries to pull himself up.

A long highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. The more I watch this show, the more I appreciate it. There’s nothing bad on the card with the worst match being either Undertaker vs. Big Show/A-Train or the street fight and even those are watchable. There’s also a great selection of top matches, though HHH vs. Booker leaves a lot to be desired. That being said, Jericho vs. Shawn, Rock vs. Austin and the main event are more than enough to make this a classic.

My main issue is still the same: the show could use a breather between all of the top matches. I could have gone for swapping in say the women’s triple threat or the Smackdown Tag Team Title match in between the street fight and Rock vs. Austin, just for the sake of a little breathing room. The way it’s done is more than fine though and it would only have been improved with a few tweaks.

Overall, it’s one of the best Wrestlemanias ever but I can’t put it above or really near the level of X7. There’s some great stuff here but it’s not enough to top everything that show has to offer. I could easily see this being the second best Wrestlemania of all time (it’s in the top three or four at the absolute worst) and that’s some pretty high levels of quality.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIX (2015 Redo): That’s Our Mr. Wrestlemania

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Sunday Night Heat: Raw Tag Team Titles: Kane/Rob Van Dam vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Ashanti sings America the Beautiful.

JR and Lawler are at a table away from ringside as they were every week on Raw.

The aisle is crooked again this year.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

The Miller Lite catfight girls are here. These are your celebrities for the show as they were good looking women who would argue over various things and then fight over them.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Rating: C. Another not bad match here with Jones doing the only thing he should have been doing. The guy was big and had a great look but at the end of the day you have to be able to do more than stare at someone and throw an awesome spin kick. Undertaker works well against monsters like Show and A-Train as can move better than both of them and the offense is fast enough to work.

Undertaker waves the American flag.

We look back at the tag match on Heat.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle

Rating: C+. Another fun match but for a different reason. As was the case on Smackdown at this point, this was all about the action and a fast pace which worked very well, especially given the wrestlers the roster had. This was a nice change from the earlier matches and entertained throughout.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

With nothing else working, Jericho puts on the Walls of Jericho but Shawn is quickly in the ropes. Jericho keeps up the psychology with a backbreaker and keeps up the story of the match with his own Sweet Chin Music for a very close two. With almost nothing else working, Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but gets countered into a cross body for two of his own.

They shake hands post match but Jericho kicks him low like a real villain.

Crooked referee Sylvan Grenier (who screwed Hogan out of his rematch with Rock the previous month) goes in to see Vince.

The new attendance record is announced.

Wrestlemania XX is in New York.

Raw World Title: Booker T. vs. HHH

Vince McMahon vs. Hulk Hogan

Shane McMahon comes out to check on his dad. Ever the evil loser, Vince flips Hogan off.

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

We recap Angle vs. Lesnar. Brock had lost the title due to Paul Heyman turning on him late last year and Angle took the title from new champion Big Show. Lesnar won the Royal Rumble to get another shot, but Angle is in horrible shape coming into this due to his neck flaring up as well. This is being set up as a major showdown between the most real wrestlers in the company and the intensity is all there.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

The show is still great though and could have been better if they had swapped the card a bit. The five major matches in a row needed to be broken up a little bit, maybe with the Undertaker match moved in between Vince vs. Hogan and Rock vs. Austin, which probably should have gone last. All of the problems (which are minor) aside though, this is still a great show and one of the best Wrestlemanias of all time.

Ratings Comparison

Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Original: D

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: A

HHH vs. Booker T

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: D+

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Original: B

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: B+

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: A-

Everything seems about the same here, though that women’s match keeps growing on me.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/26/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-19-overrated/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/28/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xix/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIX (2013 Redo): One Last Round

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

The theme song is called Crack Addict. Needless to say this was never mentioned on TV.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

The Miller Lite Catfight Girls are here. This would be your celebrity involvement for the year. They were from a series of beer commercials and would argue over various stupid things, in this case which match is bigger: Vince vs. Hogan or Rock vs. Austin III.

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring and no one cares. By plays to the ring I mean performs the song until Taker finally comes out.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

The Derailer (chokebomb) puts Taker down and Big Show rams him into the post for good measure. Back in and A-Train hits a slingshot into the middle rope for two. Big Show comes in again and all Taker can do is throw desperate right hands. A Big Show chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara Armbar of all things but A-Train comes in to break it up. Taker throws him in a cross armbreaker but Big Show legdrops him to take control.

Undertaker waves an American flag post match to show how awesome he is.

The Catfight Girls run into Stacy Keibler and Torrie in the back with talk of a new marketing campaign. Next.

Benjamin comes in off a blind tag and superkicks Chris down for two. Eddie tags himself in and collides with Benoit to put both guys down. Shelton comes in to work on Benoit some more and a legdrop gets two. Eddie breaks it up with a Frog Splash but Chavo tags himself in, only to be suplexed down by Haas. Rhyno comes in for some Gores including one to Chavo, but Benjamin comes in (I have no idea if he was legal) and steals the retaining pin on Chavo.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it had no business being on Wrestlemania. This could have been on any given episode of Smackdown and no one would have noticed the difference. Rhyno and Benoit were just thrown together while the Guerreros were a regular team and former champions. Not bad here but not Wrestlemania worthy.

We recap Shawn vs. Jericho. Shawn returned last year and won the world title in a shocker. The two of them started feuding right before the Rumble where they eliminated each other. Jericho wanted to be a wrestler because he wanted to be Shawn Michaels. People started calling him the next HBK, but he wanted to be the first Chris Jericho. Jericho then went insane with the jealousy and obsession with being the best by destroying Shawn with a chair. One night when Jericho was walking through the entrance, Shawn superkicked him and said he would see Jericho at Wrestlemania.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Back up and Jericho avoids a leapfrog and slaps Shawn in the face. Shawn slaps him right back and avoids a charge, sending Jericho out to the floor. A baseball slide keeps Jericho in trouble but back inside he rolls through a top rope cross body for two. Jericho hits a spinwheel kick to put Shawn down again before sending him into the buckle. Shawn blocks the bulldog though and crotches Jericho in the corner. At least Fozzy will have some higher pitched songs now.

Shawn puts on a Figure Four of all things but Jericho quickly rolls it over. Another attempt at the hold is countered and Jericho sends Shawn shoulder first into the post. Jericho tries to throw him to the floor but Shawn skins the cat into a headscissors to bring Jericho outside with him, followed by a sweet plancha to take Chris down again. Shawn tries a dropkick on the floor, only to be caught in the Walls of Jericho.

Jericho loads up Sweet Chin Music for the final insult and it hits just about perfectly. That only gets two as does a cross body by Shawn. Shawn keeps the thunder stealing theme going by trying the Walls on Jericho but has to opt for a catapult into the corner instead. Jericho comes back with a belly to back superplex attempt but Shawn counters in mid air into a cross body for two.

Michaels goes up again but Jericho kicks the referee into the ropes to crotch Shawn down on the top. Jericho tries a superplex but gets shoved down and hit with the top rope elbow for two. Shawn loads up the Superkick but gets caught in the Walls again. Jericho drags him back to the middle of the ring but Shawn makes it on the second attempt.

A boot to the faces gets two for Shawn as the fans are WAY into this now. Back up and Jericho whips him hard into the corner for a Flair Flip to mess with the back even more. Chris tries a belly to back suplex but Shawn flips over and jumps up into a rolling cradle for the pin out of nowhere on Jericho.

Post match Jericho kicks Shawn low like a real heel.

Sylvan Grenier, a crooked referee, goes in to see Vince.

We get the new attendance record announcement.

Limp Bizkit performs Crack Addict live. Again, not the best use of PPV time to say the least.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T

HHH is in his manly purple trunks here. They fight into the corner to start with Booker smacking HHH in the face a few times to take over. A backdrop puts HHH down but he comes back with a clothesline. The champion goes up top but just like his mentor, he gets armdragged down with ease. A clothesline puts HHH down for two but Booker goes up and gets knocked down to the floor for his efforts.

Booker gets sent into the announce table as the referee tells HHH to get back in, complete with some very salty language from the referee. Lawler keeps making jokes about Booker being an ex-con as HHH gets two off a neckbreaker. Booker tries to fight back with right hands but gets caught in a spinebuster for two for the champion. A suplex is escaped though and Booker DDTs him down for no cover.

Booker pounds away on HHH before taking him down with a forearm. A spinning variety of said forearm gets two but HHH comes back with his lame sleeper, which was the move he was trying to get over at this point to no avail. The facebuster staggers Booker but he comes back with a quick spinebuster for two. HHH tries going up again but jumps into a jumping superkick for two.

The Harlem Side Kick misses HHH and Booker crashes out to the floor. Flair gets in some shots before sending Booker back in for a freaking Indian Deathlock as we continue the trip back to 1974. Since the hold goes on forever and I have a chance to look at it, the question occurs to me of why does that hold hurt? Their legs are in the exact same positions, so why would it only hurt Booker?

Anyway Booker gets to the rope for the break and we get to the work over the leg to set up the Figure Four because we need to pay tribute to Flair every 18 seconds portion of the match. A rollup out of nowhere gets two for Booker and he counters the Pedigree, only to be kicked into the referee in the corner. Not that it matters as the referee counts a quick two off a rollup anyway.

Wrestlemania 20 is in Madison Square Garden.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. This feud was A MESS as all of a sudden Hogan came back and Vince decided he hated him so they should fight. The problem is Vince never quite made his reasons for suddenly hating Hogan clear other than Vince was nuts. This led to a debate about which of them made Wrestlemania and saying the match was 20 years in the making. Not exactly but when nothing else in the feud makes sense, why should this?

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

They head back in, only for Hogan to punch him out to the floor. Another chair shot to the back puts Vince down as does a third. Hogan swings again but knocks out the Spanish announcer by mistake. Vince hits Hogan in his Real American testicles as the slow brawling continues. A chair shot puts Hogan down and Vince pulls out a ladder, making me think this ends badly.

Shane McMahon comes out to check on his father post match. He glares at Hogan but nothing happens. Ok then. Ever the jerk, the bloody Vince flips off Hogan to end things.

We recap Rock vs. Austin III. Austin came back from walking out on the company due to boredom and the newly heel Hollywood Rock wanted to finally beat Austin at Wrestlemania. Do you need much else of a story beyond that?

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

The champ hits a SWEET release German on Brock for two and the Angle Slam gets the same. Lesnar comes back with the Angle Slam for two of his own as the fans are getting way into this now. Back to the ankle lock by Kurt and he hooks the grapevine for good measure. Brock somehow makes it to the rope, which I believe is the only time anyone has escaped the grapevine version of the ankle lock.

Both guys stagger to their feet and hug to end the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Ratings Comparison

Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Original: D

Redo: C

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: C

Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Original: C+

Redo: C

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-

Redo: A-

HHH vs. Booker T

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Original: B

Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: A-

What the heck was I thinking on that Hogan match?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/26/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-19-overrated/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIX (Original): It’s Stacked

Wrestlemania 19
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz
America The Beautiful: Ashanti

This show gets a lot of praise around here and I’m not entirely sure why. I’ve never been that enthralled by it, but maybe it needs another viewing. Your main event here is Kurt vs. Brock, which is simply due to Brock winning the Rumble and a solid build as you’re not really sure who the better man is. Brock is just past one year on television at this point and is going for his second world title.

To say he was dominant is an understatement. The real main event though is Hulk vs. Vince in a no holds barred match. It’s another instance of not putting the real main event on last, which is a shame as it got most of the buildup. Your midcard special is Jericho vs. Shawn in what was excellently built up as well.

We also get the third match in the Austin/Rock saga, which while still a big match, simply doesn’t have the big fire in it this time around. It turns out to be Austin’s last match as a regular. More or less that’s what holds this show back: the hype. The buildup was as good as any I’ve ever seen, but it wasn’t a mind blowing show. Let’s get to it.

Well done “it’s our World Series” package that never gets old, following Ashanti singing America the Beautiful which has been missed by me. The first problem with this show is simple: the theme song. Crack Addict by Limp Biskit. I never could figure out why they wouldn’t say the name of the song on television, but then it made sense. Make your own PG jokes.

Cruiserweight Title: Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is dressed as Daredevil as he beging his tradition of being a superhero at Mania. Matt is in the middle of what was always one of my favorite stupid gimmicks: Mattitude V1.0. This involves him having fun facts pop up on screen during his entrance which is made to look like he’s on a website. Today’s Mattitude Facts: Matt is appearing in his 4th Wrestlemania and Matt often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him.

He’s also desperately trying to stay at the Cruiserweight limit of 220lbs, often with comical results. Matt is accompanied by Mattitude Follower (MFer) Shannon Moore. Hardy used Disco Inferno method of Cruiserweight wrestling: Wrestle like a heavyweight and hope it works out for the best. Moore distracts Rey to start but Matt gets backdropped to the floor. Blast you little MFer.

Head scissors and a spinwheel kick put Matt down and set up an attempt at a sunset bomb to the floor. Shannon makes the save and allows Matt to take over. Shannon’s people are called Morons. Taz and Cole make bad jokes about how Matt got his weight down using terms like banana juice, teabag and BJ. You figure the rest out for yourself.

Matt locks in a bow and arrow to keep Rey on the mat for awhile. A corner charge misses though and Matt goes into the post. Seated Senton gets two for Rey and we speed things up a bit more. Shannon breaks up the 619 and there’s the Twist of Fate for two. The foul poles in the background take a bit of getting used to.

Matt tries Splash Mountain from the bottom rope but Rey reverses into a rana for two. 619 hits and it’s West Coast Pop time. Matt ducks so Rey settles for a victory roll. Hardy ducks into it ala Owen at Mania X and grabs the rope to get the win. That was abrupt to say the least.

Rating: C-. Not a fan of the ending at all. This was getting good and they cut the legs out from under it after less than six minutes. I get why they had to do that as a lot of the matches are long but the pacing of the match could have been a lot better to make that ending not seem so abrupt and not to make this seem like a TV match. Still decent though.

Time for our first bad celebrities as the Miller Light Cat Fight girls show up. They’re two hot chicks that fight over beer. Their limo couldn’t be tackier as it’s a long black limo with a sign on the door saying Catfight Girls. It just doesn’t look good at all. The dumb arguments start already.

We get a clip from earlier with Nathan Jones, Undertaker’s tag partner for later, being laid out by A-Train and Big Show. This would be due to the fact that the company thought he wasn’t capable of being on live PPV with his skills at the time. Shouldn’t they have noticed this before Wrestlemania Sunday?

Limp Bizkit performs Rollin live to play us to this.

Undertaker vs. Big Show/A-Train

This is Taker vs. Big Show for the 10th time or so. A-Train is there for no apparent reason other than to make us think Taker might have some issues here. Fred Durst does not belong in the ring at Wrestlemania with Undertaker, period. This is officially a handicap match now. A-Train spits on Taker’s bike to distract him so Show can jump him. This of course fails and A-Train takes a chokeslam for two as Show saves.

Taker hammers away at both guys and makes sure to stay out of the corner. This was part of the A-Train’s push which I never quite understood but they were trying at least. Taker busts out a leap frog of all things and there’s Old School to A-Train. Derailer (Chokebomb) hits Taker but of course he doesn’t cover. Instead he sends Taker to the floor so Show can ram him into the post.

There’s a flag on Undertaker’s bike which is due to his nephew serving in Iraq who the match has been dedicated to. Show comes in and they slug it out a bit. Taker really likes to punch doesn’t he? Show’s chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara armbar and then into a cross armbreaker to A-Train. Show drops a leg to break that up and rams some headbutts in.

Abdominal stretch goes on after all the head and neck work. I guess Show is working on the ribs now. A-Train comes in now and stomps away before putting on an abdominal stretch of his own. Taker reverses into one of his own and that’s about the extent of his offensive run as it’s back to the beating again. Train slaps him in the face because he’s not that intelligent.

Naturally Taker makes the comeback and hits a running DDT for two as Show makes the save. Show is sent to the apron by the referee so Taker hits him anyway. Here’s the comeback and the monsters are in trouble. Big clothesline takes down Show. And never mind as a bicycle kick takes his head off. Chokeslam to Taker and here comes Nathan Jones. He kicks Show in the aisle to take him down (shouldn’t that be a DQ?) and hits the ring. Big boot to A-Train and the Tombstone ends this.

Rating: D. Can someone explain to me why this got ten minutes almost and the previous match couldn’t even get six? Not much of a match and far too long for its own good. Taker was never going to lose and everyone knew it, yet they let it go off even longer which didn’t help at all. Jones was gone soon after this I believe.

Catfight girls run into the much hotter Torrie and Stacy.

We get a recap of the pointless Raw tag title match from Heat that leads nowhere. That was on Heat and the Cat Fight girls were on here. That’s life I guess.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Victoria

Jazz still isn’t cared for at all. As usual Trish looks great and gets the confetti for her entrance. Yeah, no guesses as to who is going over here. Victoria is champion coming into this and is in her total psycho phase here with the awesome T.A.T.U. theme music. I’ve always loved this character and throwing in that I always thought Victoria was mind blowingly hot isn’t hurting anything here.

Ross says that Jazz has a Mike Tyson like attitude. Lawler says it’s a Mike Tyson like look. Victoria has Steven Richards with her for no apparent reason. Jazz jumps both of them quickly and sends Victoria to the floor. She grabs a front facelock and flips forward to bend Trish in half with a facelock. Trish gets a Thesz Press and poses a lot. Victoria pulls her to the floor and we brawl out there for a bit.

Jazz vs. Trish in the ring at the moment with the less attractive one in control. Double shoulder breaker to Trish so it’s Victoria vs. Jazz now. Love that backless outfit on Victoria. Lawler says Trish is like a quarter among pennies. What the heck does that even mean? Match is kind of a mess so far but it’s not horrible. Powerslam by Jazz gets two on Trish.

The heels go at it again which Trish takes advantage of, ramming their heads together to take over. Big spin kick by Jazz misses and Trish gets a rollup for two. Chick Kick gets two. Trish kicks Victoria to the floor as Jazz shouts a lot. Half crab goes on and into an STF to Trish by Jazz. Stevie intercepts Trish’s tap out so Victoria isn’t out.

Trish gets a rollup of Victoria and we get a nice shot as Trish pulls the tights. Double chickenwing by Jazz to the blonde but Victoria takes Jazz down. Moonsault misses though, but Victoria still sends het to the floor. Stevie accidentally hits himself with a chair and takes a Stratusfaction for being an idiot. Chick Kick to Victoria gives Trish the title.

Rating: D+. This was just your standard Women’s Title match and nothing more. They’ve been the same for years and this was no different. Trish gets the title back for a token title change and would likely hold it for a very long time. Yeah that’s all I’ve got. Oh and Victoria has a nice figure.

Rock is bitter about being booed last year against Hogan and has turned his back on the people. He’s obsessed with beating Austin in a big match, which I don’t think he ever has. This takes way longer than it should have.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle vs. Rhyno/Chris Benoit

First fall wins it here as I continue to be amazed by how well Eddie suited his gimmick. While he’s not as great as he’s given credit for, he certainly was good. Team Angle is Charlie Hass and Shelton Benjamin by the way. Hass was supposed to be the breakout star at first but obviously after about two matches we knew that wasn’t going to happen. This is more of what we’ve seen all night long: a match that’s good enough to be a decent TV main event, but not WM worthy. No point here other than for the titles to be on the line.

Team Angle has the titles here. Benoit had a masterpiece with Angle at the Rumble but since a guy that was ridiculously popular and great in the ring clearly had no business feuding with HHH on Raw for the title (I mean we had SCOTT STEINER to do that) he was shoved into this pointless tag team and wasted most of 03 until he got so popular that he went to Raw the next year after winning the Rumble.

Big brawl to start as the referee tries to settle things down a bit. Chavo and Haas finally get us started. Haas tags out to Benoit and it’s Benoit vs. Eddie now. This works for me. To the shock of no one they hammer away on each other with neither guy being able to maintain an advantage. They ram heads which allows Rhyno to be brought in.

Powerslam to Eddie gets two. Benjamin comes in for the first time and works on the neck of Rhyno. Chavo breaks up a pin attempt as this is just ok. It’s like any match that could have been on Smackdown yet it’s here on Wrestlemania. Benoit suplexes Haas for two. We’re off to Rhyno vs. Benjamin now. They’re tagging in and out quickly but it’s kind of keeping anything from getting started. It’s been a random assortment of one on one matches so far. Nothing bad but nothing that interesting.

Eddie dropkicks Rhyno to take over and it’s off to Benoit vs. Guerrero again. Guerrero gets a belly to back and sets for the Frog Splash but gets caught in a superplex for two as Shelton saves. Benoit fires Eddie into the air for a flapjack and pulls him down into the Crossface in an awesome looking move. Haas breaks it up seconds later and then just leaves so the two masters can go at it some more.

Chavo comes in and cleans a lot of house. His name being Guerrero kind of hurts him as he’s always in Eddie’s shadow. Rolling Germans to Chavo but Chavo makes a blind tag to Shelton. Superkick to Benoit gets two. Eddie vs. Shelton at the moment so Shelton covers Benoit. Frog Splash breaks up the pin though so it’s off to Chavo vs. Haas. Haas suplexes him and gets Gored. Gore to Chavo and Benjamin steals the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. It was getting a lot better at the end when they dropped the tagging stuff but this was a match that could have been on any Smackdown for the most part. It’s good and definitely the best match of the night so far. Still though, not much here but good stuff for what it was.

Torrie and Stacy argue with the Catfight girls over who made Mania, Hulk or Vince. This isn’t sexy or interesting, it’s just annoying at this point as the Catfight girls read from a script. Apparently this argument is going to be settled “in bed”. Lord help us all. One of them keeps saying Holgan instead of Hogan.

From this thing on, everything is nearly 18 minutes long.

We recap Jericho vs. Shawn. Shawn came back and won the world title. Jericho ran his mouth so Jericho got kicked in the face. He eliminated Shawn from the Rumble and vice versa. Shawn was his inspiration apparently and wanted a match at Mania. Jericho was walking through the curtain one night and something kicked him in the face. Shawn came out and posed over him, saying he’d see him at Wrestlemania. Jericho was evil here, putting Stacy in the Walls of Jericho and drilling Shawn with chairs.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn brings a confetti gun with him. Oh ok he has them throughout the entrance to fire his own pyro. Cute kind of. Shawn gets pyro that goes around the back of the stadium when he does his in ring pose. That’s pretty cool. The fans are into Shawn of course as they have some mat stuff going on to start us off. Shawn lays on the top rope which is something I always found funny.

Headlock takes Jericho to the mat and out he goes to the floor. Shawn teases a plancha but Jericho sees it coming. Shawn stops and goes with a baseball slide instead. Back in a cross body gets two for Jericho as he rolls through Shawn’s move. Jericho hammers away but can’t get the bulldog. Shawn busts out a figure four and Jericho is in trouble.

After that doesn’t last long a headscissors puts Jericho on the floor, allowing Shawn to hit his plancha. Jericho counters and locks on the Walls on the floor. Shawn’s back goes into the post and HBK is in trouble. Jericho gets another dropkick to keep Shawn on the floor. Shawn’s back is the target now and it’s all Jericho. The cocky pin doesn’t work so we go to the chinlock.

Shawn reverses a suplex into a DDT but he can’t get up. Once he finally does, Jericho adds a forearm and the Nip Up. Shawn Nips Up also and then does it again. There’s the moonsault press for a long two. We get the always classic pinfall reversal sequence, resulting in a Walls attempt but Shawn kicks him off instead.

Northern Lights Suplex gets two for Jericho but Shawn bridges up for a backslide. Jericho reverses that and takes Shawn does to retain control. Lionsault gets two and Shawn starts his comeback. Rana misses though and it’s into the Walls for Shawn. Shawn makes the rope but his back is destroyed. Backbreaker sets up a top rope back elbow for no cover.

Instead Jericho Tunes up the Band. A fairly awesome Sweet Chin Music puts Shawn down for two and Jericho isn’t sure what to do next. Shawn gets a cross body out of the corner and some rights to buy himself some time. Shawn teases the Walls of Jericho but goes with a slingshot instead, sending Jericho into the post. Jericho tries a belly to back off the top but Shawn spins over into a cross body for a long two.

Shawn goes up and gets crotched via the referee being sent into the rope. Superplex is blocked though as Shawn shoves him off and there’s the elbow. Time to Tune up the Band again but the kick misses and it’s into the Walls again. A rope is grabbed and Jericho tries to beg to the referee. Chris walks into Sweet Chin Music though and down he goes but Shawn can’t cover. Both guys are back up and Jericho sends him into the corner. Shawn flips over and gets his feet under Jericho’s shoulders, rolling him backwards to end this finally.

Rating: A-. Definitely a great match, but not an all time classic. HBK shows he still can go at Mania and Jericho has one of the best matches of his life here as he’s totally into this. The only thing missing was the superkick to end it for Shawn, but this might have been better, not sure yet.

Jericho kicks Shawn in the balls post match, cranking his heel rating up by about 10.
Last month at no Way Out the show was in Montreal, there was a French ref that screwed Hogan out of the rematch with the Rock by helping Vince. He heads into Vince’s locker room.

Goldberg debuts at Backlash. That may have been the biggest flop in company history. It turns out he fought Rock in Rock’s last match before he left to make another movie, thereby more or less ending his time as an active wrestler.

New attendance record of over 54,000. Impressive again.

Limp Biskit performs AGAIN, and somehow the people couldn’t care less than they did the first time. This goes on 5 minutes.

Torrie’s Playboy came out two days later. We see clips of a news conference. We get the Catfight between the Catfight Girls and Torrie/Stacy. Coach gets stripped down to his underwear, as do the rest of the girls. Not a real match, not an interesting segment. The only thing good about this is Stacy’s Legs music which I always liked.

Time to talk about the Raw World title. This show has been on for nearly two hours and this literally hasn’t been mentioned until now. There hasn’t been a graphic, there hasn’t been hype, there hasn’t been an interview. If that’s not proof that the title matches aren’t the biggest on the card, I don’t know what is.

The idea here is that they’re playing up Booker’s hard life growing up vs. HHH’s privileged lifestyle. Booker pinned him on Raw in a tag match. Nothing about this match screams Mania at all. Unforgiven or Judgement Day maybe, but not Wrestlemania.

Raw World Title: Booker T vs. HHH

Oh and Booker pinned HHH on Raw this past week. I forgot about that but it’s not like it’s going to matter. HHH has the purple tights on here too. Poor Booker. He actually thinks he has a chance here. We hear about his hard life and how he worked his way up to become a 5 time WCW Champion. Jerry: HHH told us how much of a joke that place was. Ross: I worked in WCW. You didn’t. How would you know it was a joke? Jerry: Was it a joke? Ross: Darn right it was! Too funny.

They slug it out in the corner to start with Booker having a slight advantage. HHH actually goes up top and gets arm dragged down. Out to the floor now and the champion goes into the post. Back in and a clothesline gets two for Booker. Now we talk about the Fink for no apparent reason. HHH sends Booker to the apron and rams his head into the post to take over.

Jerry keeps making prison/court jokes about Booker. Neckbreaker by HHH gets two and he lays in the shots. The fans chant for Booker so HHH hits a spinebuster on him to quiet that down and get two in the process. Big clothesline in the corner gets the same. Suplex gets reversed and Booker hits a DDT and Lawler makes fun of Booker again. Ross has to stop himself from saying GD which gets Lawler laughing.

Side slam gets no cover for Booker but a spinning forearm gets two. Sleeper by HHH doesn’t work but a high knee does. It’s been mainly the champion in control here. Facebuster connects but HHH walks into a spinebuster for two. HHH tries to go up again and jumps into a jump kick by Booker for two. Axe kick and side kick misses, the latter of which sends Booker to the floor.

Flair drills Booker’s knee into the stairs to give HHH something to work on. HHH busts out an inverted Indian Death Lock which you won’t see for years. HHH, love him or hate him, is almost as old school as you get. Off to a regular one as Booker is in trouble. For those of you unfamiliar, the best way I can put it is a Sharpshooter with the legs instead of the arms and legs and less torque on the back. It doesn’t matter as a rope is grabbed.

HHH tries to send him into the corner and Booker collapses. Knee crusher is reversed into a sunset flip for two as the fans pop big for it. Pedigree is countered but Booker is launched into the referee who stays down for about a second. Must not have been planned. Booker gets a jumping back elbow and his leg is fine now. Scissors kick puts HHH down as now the leg hurts again. That gets two.

Booker goes up but Flair interferes to let HHH get to Mr. T. Superplex is blocked and Booker hits the Harlem (Houston here) Hangover for no count as Flair puts the foot on the ropes. Naturally, as after all HHH isn’t allowed to lose the title for a very long time right? Booker’s knee gives way and HHH hits the Pedigree. Twenty five seconds later HHH puts his hand on Booker and retains. Well of course he does.

Rating: C+. This was around the time that HHH was trying to expand his moveset to include things like the sleeper, Indian deathlock and DDT. They’re ok, but he wanted them as extra finishers and that just didn’t work. It was a very weird time in his career right now and this match it the crowning glory of that time. It’s clear here that Booker wasn’t going to win the title and was being fed to HHH. If you want to see the time where people say HHH was taking over the company, here is exhibit A.

WM 20 is going to be at Madison Square Garden. That is where it belongs.

We recap Hogan vs. Vince. If Hogan loses, he retires…again. This is billed as 20 years in the making, despite this being the 19th year of Mania. The fight is over who should get the credit for Mania, both the Hulka and Wrestle varities. That’s a thread that was great when it was done and I’d like to see a replay of it.

Anyway, this is a street fight for obvious purposes. It’s also the match that sold this show, but in WWE logic, that can’t go on last of course as they didn’t learn from last year. While obviously this isn’t the entire story, the more I see of this the more I think Hulk should get more credit. Based on the video alone, this should be the main event.

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Hogan comes out to Voodoo Child. Are you serious? WWE owns the rights to the most legendary theme song in wrestling history and they use Voodoo Child? The pop is barely even there which surprises me. The fans are into it, but there’s not much special.

To top it all off, he comes out first. Seriously? I know Vince isn’t a fan of Hogan’s but this is absurd. Once they say his name he gets a pop, but I really think the fans didn’t know who he was at first. Hogan, nice guy that he is, rips up a Vince Still Sucks sign.To say McMahon is ripped is an understatement.

Hogan takes him down with a clothesline to start and we get some “ground and pound.” Vince fights back and hammers away, working on the arm. They’re moving incredibly slowly right now too. The arm goes around the post as we talk about the steroids trial in the early 90s, which according to Stephanie was like 9/11. Test of strength goes on and Hogan fights back up.

They ram chests like Warrior and Hogan but once again Vince kicks him in the gut to bring him back to his knees. Vince having a muscular man on his knees. Make your own jokes here. Hogan fights up for the third time and gets kicked in the ribs again and sent to the floor. Vince hammers away even more and has been in control the majority of the match here.

Chair shot to Hogan misses and Vince is rammed into the post instead. The chair drills Vince as Hulk takes over for a bit. Vince is busted open so Hogan hammers away. Crowd is into this too. Another chair to the back and down goes Vince. Hogan misses a chair shot and the Spanish Announcer takes it in the head. That’s what he gets for putting stuff on their table I guess.

Low blow by Vince shifts control again and he grabs the chair. And now Vince sets up a ladder. This cannot end well at all. He sets it between the tables and Hogan is laid out on the Spanish Announce Table with a monitor shot to the head. Vince climbs up, does the hand to the ear, and drops a leg onto Hogan, leaving both people laying.

After they lay around for about two minutes off of that, Vince rolls him back in and gets two for a big (although what should be an unsurprised) pop. Vince’s face is creepy from that. He goes under the ring and luckily finds a lead pipe. We get the famous shot of Vince’s crazy/evil eyes as he slowly rises up above the apron to get back in.

Hogan, ever the hero, gets a low blow to make Vince drop the pipe. A guy runs in through the crowd in a hood and pulls it off, revealing Rowdy Roddy Piper. Well he belongs in the discussion I guess. He picks up the pipe and drills Hogan with it, I guess being a heel. Piper is fathere too. Piper leaves and that gets two, putting us right back to where we were before Piper got here.

The referee steps on the pipe so Vince can’t use it. It’s a street fight so anything goes right? Vince drills him and waves down another referee. He gets two: an actual referee and the aforementioned French referee (future tag champion Sylvan Grenier). Another pipe shot and leg drop get two as Hulk Hulks Up. Down goes the French dude to the power of AMERICA. Hogan drops THREE leg drops and this is finally over.

Rating: B. While not the legendary classic it gets credit for, this was very fun indeed. Piper makes little to no sense to me at all here. Stupidly enough, it led to a feud between Hogan and Piper/Sean O’Haire. Really? Anyway, this was a very fun fight all day. I never really thought Vince would win, but it was fun to believe in him for awhile. Biggest flaw for me though: that freaking Voodoo Child song. HULK HOGAN’S MUSIC IS REAL AMERICAN. Anyone could tell you that. So freaking stupid.

Shane comes out to check on his dad. Yeah that’s all he’s here for. Seriously, he does nothing else.

We recap Rock vs. Austin. What recap do you need here? This match is the epitome of a grudge match. The idea here is simple: Rock has never beat Austin in a big match, namely at WM. He has done it all but defeat his arch rival and it’s killing him. This would have been so much more effective had it been 1-1 at Mania for them.

The problem for me was simple. So what if Rock wins? It’s still 2-1 Austin and Austin beat him twice for the title. That doesn’t exactly scream even to me. This is a weird thing to do here as Rock is finally (get it?) as big as Austin as far as star power despite Austin being so far past his prime he can’t even see it and Rock would be gone in a month, but he’s finally the true heel here and it’s one on one.

This whole match is built on Rock needing to win and getting more and more desperate to do it. They’re both nowhere near as good as they were 2-3 years ago, but they’re still very solid.

This gets the music video treatment but it doesn’t pack anywhere near the punch of My Way.

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

This is Austin’s last match as today. Austin comes off his fourth corner and turns around to see Rock waiting on him. This is the first time Austin came out second I think. There’s the bell and these two at Mania just feel right. They slug it out and Austin takes control, shocking no one. Stunner misses early and we hit the floor. We go to the Smackdown table with Austin beating Rock to death.

Rock goes into the steps and takes a belly to back suplex in the ring. We get into the wrestler vs. actor debate which is rather interesting indeed. This match has DQs mind you. Rock gets a shot to Austin’s knee which I think is his first offense of the match so far. Out to the floor again and Rock gets a second chop block to take Austin down.

After some more knee work on the floor Rock sends him into the ring again and stomps away. Austin fires off some punches but lowers his head and Rock takes the knee out again to stop Austin’s momentum. Sharpshooter goes on and Austin is in trouble. Hebner is the referee so I’d listen for a quick bell. Rock might take that….something or other to Hollywood and Vince might not get to make a bombing movie out of it.

Ross goes OFF on Jerry about talking about Hollywood so much. Rock wraps Austin’s leg around the post again and throws on Austin’s vest. Oh my stars and garter belts. Austin fights back and it’s a double clothesline to put both of them down. Back up and they slug it out with the knee seemingly fine again. I guess that’s a Texan thing. Thesz Press and Austin hammers away.

FU Elbow gets two, probably because it’s just an elbow drop. Austin stomps a mudhole but Rock hits a clothesline and nips up. Austin gets a Rock Bottom out of nowhere to the Rock as he’s still in the vest. That gets two. Stunner is blocked but Rock gets the Stunner for two of his own. That should be a scoring system in the event of a tie.

Rock hammers away but the final punch misses and it’s a Stunner by Austin for a long two. Austin tosses the referee away to get to Rock but Rock gets a low blow and it’s time for the People’s Elbow. Austin moves out of the way but can’t get another Stunner. The second People’s Elbow (minus the jacket) gets two, likely because it’s just an elbow drop.

Both guys are spent and Rock is getting up first. The fans are all over the Rock here. Rock Bottom hits but only gets two and a big pop. Rock is stunned. See what I did there? Another Rock Bottom somehow gets two and Rock doesn’t know what to do. A third Rock Bottom FINALLY ends Austin and the Rock has finally gotten the win at Wrestlemania over Austin.

Rating: B+. This is a tricky one. It’s a far cry from their epic wars before and is a joke compared to their match two years ago, but this was a different kind of match. I shortchanged this before but this is a good match. Rock was the star here, which granted has to do with him being 30 and Austin being 39 here. They beat the heck out of each other and while Austin was a shell of his former self he was still good here. Good match and a good way to close out Austin’s career.

Austin gets the big sendoff as I think it was kind of understood that he was done at this point.

We recap Angle vs. Lesnar. Lesnar won the Rumble to get here and Kurt is champion. Kurt had thrown Team Angle at Lesnar a bunch and kept ticking Lesnar off, including switching places with his brother to get a pin on Brock in a title match. This is more or less a dream match and if anyone interferes, if Kurt gets counted out or disqualified, he loses the title.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

And here we are. FINALLY it’s the last match of the show but the fans are so drained they don’t even know what’s going on anymore. Kurt had reinjured his neck but instead of being out for a year and you know, really getting it fixed, he got a quick fix, resulting in him likely being on the verge of death every time he gets in the ring. There was a real chance this was his last match. Cole’s voice is almost completely gone here. Lesnar of course has a rib injury. My goodness when did he not have a rib injury?

Brock debuted the night after Mania the year before (which was in mid March but we’ll call it a year still) so this is an incredible rookie year for him. We get both of their resumes and they’re incredibly impressive to say the least. Tito Ortiz is in the front row. All of a sudden a lot of the ground and pound and submission stuff just got a lot funnier.

Shocking no one they go to the mat and technical stuff early. It’s so weird to see guys that are awesome at what they do with that stuff and have it look this good. Angle tries the headlock but Lesnar easily overpowers him. Kurt is moving very gingerly here. Brock fires off those shoulders in the corner and gets a powerslam for two.

Angle snaps off a suplex but Brock is right back up almost immediately. Out to the floor with Kurt trying to run. By the power of Akbar though, IT’S A TRAP and Kurt drills Brock as he comes in to take over. Brock is like screw that and gets a gorilla press to take over again. Angle Germans Brock into the buckle in an awesome spot. Brock gets pounded down on the floor for a bit.

Belly to back gets two in the ring. A vertical version of it gets two as well. Kurt grabs a modified STF that has Brock in agony. It shifts off into a chinlock as Angle loses the leg hold. Modified camel clutch now which furthers the pain in the ribs. Can’t say Kurt doesn’t have psychology going for him. Brock stands up and rams Kurt’s back into the corner to break the hold.

Belly to belly by Kurt reinjures Lesnar’s ribs as does a knee to the back. A second sends Brock to the floor. Back in Angle runs into a spinebuster Brock comes back and hammers away with the power but runs into an elbow. BIG belly to belly sends Angle flying as does a second one. Those get two and probably another neck surgery for Kurt.

Angle grabs Rolling Germans out of nowhere, each time landing on the back of his head and neck. This time it’s 4 suplexes though and both guys are spent. Neither finisher can hit with the F5 being countered into the ankle lock. That gets shifted to the half crab which is probably a stupid move by Kurt given the position he had Brock in. Cole’s voice is gone. Get that man some tea.

Kurt charges but gets backdropped to the floor to give Brock a chance to breathe. Brock takes over but Angle gets one HECK of a German suplex, flipping Lesnar onto his stomach in the air for two. There go the straps and the Angle Slam hits, naturally, for two. Cole says that’s the first time anyone has kicked out of it. Something tells me that’s nonsense.

Brock counters another Slam attempt into a small package that Taz calls a Spladle or something like that. Yeah it was a small package. F5 out of nowhere gets two as the crowd is finally into this. Ankle Lock goes on and gets the grapevine. Wow so someone actually did escape this. Ankle lock is avoided, as is the Slam. HUGE F5 puts Angle down, but Brock goes up instead.

We now get the sickest looking spot in a good many years at any show as Lesnar, weighing nearly 300lbs and being dead tired goes to the top rope. Now when I originally watched this, I had seen Lesnar down in OVW use a shooting star press and it was the best thing I’d ever seen in a wrestling ring, but there was no way I could ever believe he would throw one out at Wrestle-freaking-mania.

Of course he did though, but he shows why he shouldn’t, as he under-rotates and lands on his head. I don’t care who you are, that is sick looking. Luckily Angle is smart enough to cover him here to keep the match going. Right there, if Lesnar had gotten pinned I don’t think anyone would have been able to say a word to him.

They show the replay from another camera angle and you can hear Taz absolutely freak over it. That was indeed one of the sickest looking things I’ve ever seen. Lesnar hits another F5 and gets the win. Post match, Lesnar’s eyes show that he is absolutely gone. He has no clue where he is and it looks bad. Angle shakes his hand and fireworks play us out. Clearly not the planned finish but they did what they could and it made sense given the circumstances.

Rating: A-. These guys nearly killed each other, literally. One of those suplexes goes bad and Angle dies, Lesnar nearly killed himself on the ending. This was a great match though, but the ending just stops it in its tracks and it really hurts things. Had that landed, this is a definite A. It’s certainly worth watching though.

Brock is handed the title and is absolutely gone. I doubt he knew his name at this point.

Overall Rating: B. This went back and forth for me. It’s definitely good, but it’s far from great. It ended well with the face taking the gold like he should have, but the booking for this show was absolutely terrible. What this show desperately needed was a first half main event. Look at your final five matches: HBK/Jericho (best wrestling on the card by far), HHH vs. Booker T (Raw Title), Street Fight (the real main event), Austin/Rock (no explanation needed) and Lesnar/Angle (SD Title).

You can clearly see the problem. There’s no chance at all to catch your breath here and it’s very draining. A filler, like say Taker’s match in between there somewhere and another like the triple threat tag match, or even the Raw Tag Titles from Heat would have nearly saved this show. Maybe a segment or something like that also. Either way, the second half of this show is WAY too packed and it hurts things badly. The show is good, but I’d watch it out of order. Recommended, but not as great as it’s made out to be.

 

 

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Dynamite – March 17, 2021: So Much For The Barbed Wire

Dynamite
Date: March 17, 2021
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

It’s time for the next special show as we have a St. Patrick’s Day special. This time around we have the fallout from last week’s big angle with the Inner Circle being laid out by MJF and his new group. Other than that, we have a major showdown with Thunder Rosa and Britt Baker. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

MJF and company arrived at the airport earlier today.

Penta El Zero M vs. Cody Rhodes

During the intros, Penta (through a translator) promises to send Cody onto an early paternity leave. Penta jumps Cody during the entrances and we starts on the floor. Some kicks to the face and leg have Cody in more trouble and they head inside. Cody screams at Penta for chopping him and hits a release gordbuster. The Sling Blade gives Penta two and a Backstabber is good for the same.

Penta starts going after Cody’s bad arm but he’s fine enough to send Penta out to the apron. That means the Disaster Kick out to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. Back in and Cero Miedo is broken up with a superkick into a Canadian Destroyer into the Cody Cutter for two. Cross Rhodes gets two, as does a Vertebreaker, because modern professional wrestling is ridiculous. Cody wraps the leg around the post to set up the Figure Four but Penta makes the rope. Another Figure Four attempt is countered into the arm snap but Cody grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 10:09.

Rating: C+. Yeah I know they did a lot of cool stuff but they completely lost me with the ridiculous amount of kickouts. Sure a lot of people do it these days and it’s still ridiculous. Cody hit two finishers, a Vertebreaker and his submission with Penta surviving everything until a rollup got the pin. There is no need to do that much in a ten minute opening match and it was turning into a near joke.

Post match the Nightmare Family comes out to chase Penta off. QT Marshall gets out late and the Nightmare Family (all six members in the ring to chase off one Penta) is annoyed at him for being late.

The Young Bucks are ready to face Rey Fenix and Pac when Don Callis comes in. He’s heard that their dad wasn’t feeling good so Callis got him a shirt (“Do Not Slap Leg When Kicking”. SEE??? BECAUSE IT WAS A WWE THING AND THAT MEANS IT’S FUNNY TO REFERENCE IT BECAUSE IT MUST BE STUPID!!!). Anyway, Callis wanted to see the Bucks that he saw in Japan but there is nothing elite about them here. As for Kenny Omega, he is now the wrestling god and Omega doesn’t recognize the Bucks because they are just another team with fancy tights. Do they see the same Bucks they saw in Japan? Yay Japan. Again.

Jade Cargill vs. Dani Jordyn

Cargil doesn’t waste time in hitting a jumping knee and we hit the posing. A release German suplex sends Jordyn flying and Jade nips up, setting up Jaded (Glam Slam) for the pin at 1:17. That’s exactly how Cargill should be presented: total dominance with her doing the things she can make look good. Don’t have her trying to run before she can crawl.

Post match Cargill gets in Red Velvet’s face but is held back.

We look back at the big beatdown to end last week’s show.

Here are MJF and company for a chat. Tully Blanchard talks about how great it is to be in the middle of the ring with this bunch of guys. Last week they were in the ring with the Inner Circle and you saw them destroyed. So doesn’t that make this new group the most dominant group? That makes them the pinnacle (that sounds like a name) of professional wrestling. Thirty four years ago, Tully started his career with the best team in wrestling and now he’s ending it with them too.

MJF says now he is Judas and talks about how hard it was to take a backseat to Jericho for six months. Every time Jericho talked, he had to fall back as Jericho’s hairline. MJF sang and danced for Jericho and pretended to like his comedy BS, but it worked as planned. He was plucking Jericho feather by feather and then it was the coup de grace: he convinced everyone that he wanted to take over the Inner Circle. From day one, the plan was to kill the Inner Circle from the inside because he wanted to build something even better.

Tully was right when he called this group the Pinnacle and MJF talks about every member of the team. Then there is MJF himself, because he is the most talked about star in wrestling at 24 year old. He has 25 years plus left in the tank and that must make a lot of people want to put their fist through the screen. The GOAT spot is reserved for him and the Pinnacle is ready to be the backbone of AEW for years to come. And yes, he is better than us and we know it. Good promo here, with MJF selling it to perfection as you would expect.

Jurassic Express/Bear Country vs. Matt Hardy/Butcher and the Blade/Private Party

During the entrances, Hardy talks about how his team loves to make money and how he is building an empire. Matt wants to face Stunt to start but Marko makes him charge into the corner. That lets Jungle Boy comes in with a missile dropkick and everything breaks down in a hurry. The good guys clear the ring and Bear Country LAUNCHES Marko over the top (and he barely got his head down in time) for the huge crash.

Boulder throws Marq Quen but accidentally hits Boy by mistake, allowing Hardy to hit the Side Effect for two. We take a break and come back with Luchasaurus cleaning house with a bunch of kicks. The standing moonsault press gets two on Kassidy and it’s off to Bronson for a suplex.

Luchasaurus does not like Bronson coming in but Marko tags himself in as well as the good guys break down. A brawl breaks out on the floor and Kassidy kicks Marko in the face. Matt cuts off Marko’s comeback attempt and there’s Gin and Juice. That lets Matt tag himself in and hit the Twist of Fate for the pin on Stunt at 8:43.

Rating: C-. The tension between the Express and Bear Country could lead to a decent mini feud, but I’m not sure how much more they can milk out of Hardy. The Big Money Matt character is slightly better than Broken Matt but it’s still Matt Hardy as the focal point in 2021. That is only going to get them so far and it is getting more and more obvious every time he is in the ring.

Jon Moxley and Eddie Kingston say they don’t like the Good Brothers, and it isn’t just because Moxley wasted his money on Talk N Shop A Mania. Moxley thinks Karl Anderson has googly eyes like something you see kids making with construction paper. Kingston says this isn’t Tokyo or the Impact Zone because this is their home. The Good Brothers are cowards who die a thousand deaths. Moxley and Kingston are soldiers who will only die once. See you out there. I’m not wild on their matches, but these are two of the best talkers on wrestling right now and they’re a highlight every week.

Christian talks about people who are considered workhorses in this business. He is the kind of guy who makes other wrestlers look better but he isn’t a workhorse. That’s because he is THE workhorse but he only wants one spot. That spot is currently held by the AEW World Champion, who he got to meet last week. Omega is on borrowed time as World Champion and they’ll see each other down the road. He is here to cement his legacy and out work everyone. More good talking here, with Christian not sounding like he did in WWE, which is a welcome result.

Eddie Kingston/Jon Moxley vs. Good Brothers

The Brothers jump Kingston during his entrance but here is Moxley, with his shoulder taped from the barbed wire match, to start the fight. Moxley is sent shoulder first into the barricade and the Magic Killer drops him on the floor. The bell rings and it’s Kingston getting hammered down in the corner. More shots to the face give Gallows two as Moxley is still down on the floor.

Kingston gets in some chops but Gallows kicks Moxley off the apron as we take a break. Back with Kingston hitting a middle rope shoulder to drop Gallows and suplexing Anderson. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Moxley, who hits a running dropkick to send Anderson into the corner.

The running clothesline sets up a piledriver for two and there’s a suicide dive onto Gallows. Back in and Anderson scores with the spinebuster on Moxley, followed by the belly to back suplex/neckbreaker combination to plant Kingston. Gallows and Moxley brawl out to the floor, leaving Moxley to small package Anderson for the pin at 9:53.

Rating: C+. I liked this one as they told a good story with Moxley being down for the most part to leave this as a handicap match. The Good Brothers are fine as the enforcers for Omega and that’s all they need to be. This was mainly a one sided match until things picked up in the end, which is the story they were telling. Good enough match here.

Post match the beatdown takes out Moxley and here is Kenny Omega, dancing to the ring (that was great) and Kingston gets a Magic Killer. Kingston gets his ankle Pillmanized and the chair is wrapped around Moxley’s neck. Cue the Young Bucks to make the save but Omega gets in Matt’s face. Omega keeps wanting the Too Sweet, even with the Bucks looking ready to fight. Moxley gets the chair to clear the ring and Omega talks about his shoe. Omega was a bit loopy here and it worked….kind of? The dancing certainly did.

Tony Schiavone brings out Sting for his weekly chat but brings out Darby Allin as well for a change. Allin talks about winning the TNT Title and is here to defending it every week. He wants to pay tribute to the best TNT Champion of all time and will defend the title against any member of the Dark Order. Cue Lance Archer and Jake Roberts to interrupt. Archer wants to know why Sting is always getting the TV time and calls Allin the most indyrific wrestler around here. Roberts tells Allin to go put his hot dog bun back on because he is just a weenie.

Archer and Roberts leave so here is Team Taz, with Brian Cage speaking for himself this week. Cage talks about how great the street fight was and says he respects Sting. With or without the bat, Ricky Starks is wrong: Sting is still the Icon. Cage leaves as the rest of the team yells at him.

Video on Scorpio Sky, who was always the nice guy because no one wanted him to be the star. Now, everything has changed.

Rey Fenix vs. Angelico

Angelico takes him down to the mat to start but Fenix flips out of a wristlock. An armdrag takes Angelico down and we reset a bit. Angelico grabs the arm and starts hammering away on the tape on Fenix’s back. We take a break and come back with Fenix making the comeback and hitting the rolling cutter for two. A fireman’s carry is broken up and Fenix gets sent into the corner. An exchange of kicks to the head sets up Fenix’s crucifix bomb. The Black Fire Driver finishes Angelico at 7:31.

Rating: C+. These guys beat each other up for a few minutes and that was all it needed to be. I’m not sure why this wouldn’t be Fenix and Pac beating up the Hybrid 2 but the less Jack Evans around, the better things can be. Fenix continues to be as entertaining as it gets and I’m looking forward to the Tag Team Title match.

Miro is working out but stops to say he is sick of hearing about Chuck Taylor and Orange Cassidy. Kip Sabian comes in to say he isn’t done with them and wants the rematch. He also isn’t happy with Miro for bumping into Penelope Ford but Miro says the worst thing you can do is have your wife at ringside (right). Miro leaves and Fenix accepts the rematch on behalf of the team.

John Silver accepts the TNT Title challenge for next week.

The Pinnacle takes over the Inner Circle’s dressing room.

Thunder Rosa vs. Britt Baker

Lights out, meaning anything goes and Rebel is here with Baker. Speaking of Rebel, she hits Rosa from behind with a crutch before the bell and Baker takes it to the stage. The Air Raid Crash on the ramp gets two, as apparently this is falls count anywhere. Baker misses a chair shot against the barricade as we see Hikaru Shida watching from the back. Rosa is back up and throws a chair at Baker’s face and another shot to the back. Baker is sent over the barricade with Rosa following but missing a charge into a chair.

They’re back at ringside with Rebel helping Baker set up a table. A bunch of chairs are thrown inside and Rosa is busted open. We take a break and come back with Baker superplexing her onto the pile of chairs, which leaves her down as well. A delayed cover gets two and Rebel slides in a ladder. Rosa sends Baker face first into the ladder for two and there are the running knees in the corner.

The ladder is put on Baker’s face and a running dropkick crushes Baker in the corner. That busts her open too as commentary can’t believe how this is going. Baker is bleeding hard but manages to send her into the ladder. Rosa is down and Baker goes up….but gets Death Valley Drivered off the top and into the ladder for the huge crash. That’s good for two as well and somehow Baker is back up with a DDT onto the chair. The stomp onto a chair gets the same but Baker, who is covered in blood, smiles.

Rebel slips in the glove….and a bag of tacks as well. Rosa is back up and tries a powerbomb onto the tacks, only to have Rebel offer a distraction. That’s fine with Rosa, who knocks her off the apron and through the table, followed by the powerbomb onto the tacks for two. Baker pulls her down into the Lockjaw but Rosa rolls it into the tacks for the break in a painfully smart move. A hard low superkick rocks Rosa again and they head to the apron with Rosa pulling her off the top. That means a Fire Thunder Driver through the table to finally end Baker at 16:37.

Rating: A. This was everything you could have wanted from the match and more, but above all else it felt like a war. You could feel that these two were going to do everything they could to beat the other, but also to survive as long as they could. It was as hard hitting and brutal of a match as I have seen in a long time and I dug the heck out of the whole thing. I got a lot more out of the violence here than in the barbed wire match and I would not have bet on this coming in. Great match and check it out for sure.

They’re both mostly done to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. That main event bailed out an otherwise pretty meh show, as it was the only thing worth seeing. The good thing is that it is VERY worth seeing and made up for almost everything else. The first twenty minutes of this show had me ready to trash the whole thing but it did get better as it went along. I’m not big on some of the stories they are telling here, but at least they had a classic to wrap it up. Good show, and that is almost entirely attributed to the main event and some solid promos.

Results

Cody Rhodes b. Penta El Zero M – Sunset flip

Jade Cargill b. Dani Jordyn – Jaded

Matt Hardy/Butcher and the Blade/Private Party b. Jurassic Express and Bear Country – Twist of Fate to Stunt

Eddie Kingston/Jon Moxley b. Good Brothers – Small package to Anderson

Rey Fenix b. Angelico – Black Fire Driver

Thunder Rosa b. Britt Baker – Fire Thunder Driver through a table

 

 

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Revolution 2021: Bang, In Really Small Letters

Revolution 2021
Date: March 7, 2021
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Excalibur, Jim Ross

There is something rather pleasing about having another AEW pay per view. The company has such a great track record with these things and it should be awesome to see what they can do again. The main event is an exploding barbed wire deathmatch because….I have no idea why but it is certainly going to get them some attention. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Britt Baker/Rebel vs. Riho/Thunder Rosa

Hold on though as Rebel has been attacked (she’s on crutches so it must be true) so we have a replacement.

Pre-Show: Britt Baker/Maki Itoh vs. Riho/Thunder Rosa

Itoh sings her own entrance song rather loudly. Riho takes Baker down by the arm to start so it’s quickly off to the rope. Some dropkicks rock Baker and there’s a headscissors to put Baker down again. Rosa comes in to armbar Itoh down and it’s switched into a crossface. With that broken up, Rosa wins an exchange of forearms and Itoh starts to cry. A stomp to Rosa’s boot just makes her shoulder Itoh down and she drops Itoh face first onto the turnbuckle.

Riho comes in and gets dropped down onto Itoh for two of her own. Back up and they slug it out until Baker pulls Riho to the floor, where Rebel is suddenly fine enough to send her into the steps. Itoh misses a falling headbutt back inside so it’s back to Baker to stomp away. A missed charge allows the tag off to Rosa so house can be cleaned. The running backsplash gets two on Baker but a Sling Blade drops Rosa.

Now Itoh’s falling headbutt gets two but Rosa is right back with a Stunner. Itoh hits a tornado DDT for two so she goes up top, only to miss the falling headbutt. Riho comes back in and charges into a half crab from Itoh, meaning a rope has to be grabbed. Another headbutt is blocked with a shot to the head and it’s quickly back to Rosa vs. Baker for the exchange of rollups. Baker runs into Rebel by mistake and walks into the Death Valley Driver with Itoh making the save. Rebel gets in a crutch shot to Rosa to give Baker the pin at 14:52.

Rating: C+. It was certainly energetic and fast paced and it was quite nice to see Baker get the win. The Rebel swap was fine as Itoh certainly has a lot of charisma, though I’m not sure how long she is going to be around here. If it is a one off appearance then great, but I’d hope it isn’t someone else in the way of Baker getting her overdue Women’s Title.

The opening video looks at the big matches.

Tag Team Titles: Young Bucks vs. Chris Jericho/MJF

The Bucks are defending and jump Jericho and MJF to start and hammer them out to the floor. Jericho and MJF send them together but stop to brag a bit, allowing the Bucks to take them down with stereo dives. The Bucks grab stereo Sharpshooters until the ropes are grabbed so Nick heads up top. This time Jericho is ready for it and hits the triangle dropkick to send him outside to take over.

Back in and a flapjack lets Jericho and MJF mock the Bucks’ pose. Nick flips over and slides between the legs to make the hot tag to Matt. The house cleaning doesn’t even get past the first room as MJF takes him down and gets in a Fargo Strut. Jericho hits a suplex as JR’s voice sounds like it is about to go out. A double suplex gets two on Matt and we hit the chinlock. Matt fights up but gets sent back into the corner, where he comes out with a double DDT.

It’s back to Nick to pick the pace way up, including the slingshot Canadian Destroyer for two on MJF. Everything breaks down with Matt hammering away at Jericho, who reverses into the Walls. That’s broken up so the Meltzer Driver is loaded up, only to have Jericho reverse into a Tombstone. Now the Walls can go on in full until Jericho stops to drag it back to the middle, allowing Matt to slip out. A missed charge in the corner crotches Jericho so MJF comes back in to counter a hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb for two.

MJF gets rather cocky so Matt scoops him up for the Meltzer Driver, only to have Jericho hit the Codebreaker on Nick for the save. A Floyd the baseball bat sets up the Heatseeker for two on Matt and MJF is stunned. It’s back to Nick so the Bucks can hit stereo high crossbodies for two each. Jericho’s Judas Effect hits Wardlow by mistake but the Lionsault is superkicked out of the air. The BTE Trigger gets two as MJF makes the save, earning himself a trip to the floor. The Meltzer Driver finishes Jericho at 17:50.

Rating: B-. They did a nice job of making me buy into the drama off the Heatseeker so they had to be doing something right. There wasn’t much of a reason to believe new champions were coming here but they did a nice enough job of changing my mind throughout. Good opener, though it went on a little longer than it should have.

Post match we run down the card, with JR apologizing for how bad his voice sounds (fair enough as he sounds horrible).

Casino Battle Royale

It’s a tag team Royal Rumble with 15 teams announced coming in. There are ninety second intervals and both members have to be eliminated, with the winners becoming #1 contenders. At least they have the casino game to validate the gambling theme this time. The Natural Nightmares (Dustin Rhodes/QT Marshall) are in at #1 and the Dark Order (5/10) are in at #2 and the brawling is on in a hurry. Dustin snaps off the powerslam on 5 but Marshall is caught in a fall away slam/running dropkick combination. A double bulldog takes the Order down and it’s Santana/Ortiz in at #3.

House is cleaned but the Order knocks them both down. Marshall tosses 5 for the first elimination and has to hang on when 10 tries to toss him out as well. The Sydal Brothers are in at #4 and we get everyone brawling again with no one being tossed. The ring is getting a little full and the Dark Order (Evil Uno/Stu Grayson) are in at #5 to make it even more crowded. Everyone in the Dark Order teams up on Santana for a toss powerbomb and 10 adds a spinebuster. Mike Sydal was tossed in there somewhere so things are a little less full. The Gunn Club (Austin/Colton) are in at #6 and get to clean house for a bit.

The Quick Draw takes Santana down and Matt Sydal is out for the first full team elimination. Peter Avalon/Cezar Bononi are in at #7 and get in their own share of house cleaning. With no more eliminations, the Varsity Blonds (Brian Pillman Jr./Griff Garrison) are in at #8. The Gunn Club starts taking over with Peter Avalon being tossed. Bononi is in trouble but Marshall dumps both of them (despite them being part of the Nightmare Family). Dustin yells at him but Marshall eliminates himself and walks out as Bear Country (Bronson/Boulder, who I’ve never actually seen in the ring before) are in at #9.

A big boot to Grayson is enough for the Bears to toss him and Jurassic Express (Jungle Boy/Luchasaurus) is in at #10. Jungle Boy clotheslines Ortiz out and Luchasaurus does the same to Bononi to get rid of another team. There go Garrison, Santana and Evil Uno all at the Express’ hands and Butcher and the Blade are in at #11. The rest of the Dark Order is out thanks to interference from Jack Evans, leaving us with Dustin, Bear Country, the Jurassic Express and Butcher and Blade. Bunny gets involved and pulls Dustin out to get us down to six at the moment.

Private Party (Marq Quen/Isaiah Kassidy) are in at #12 to make it eight people at once and more brawling ensues. Stunt saves Pillman from being tossed it’s SCU (Christopher Daniels/Kazarian) in at #13. Luchasaurus breaks up their house cleaning but Bear Country tosses him out. Butcher dumps both Bears thanks to a Bunny distraction, only to have the two of them pull Butcher underneath the ropes to beat the heck out of him.

Rey Fenix and Pac are in at #14 to wreck a bunch of people and toss Quen and Blade. The brawling continues until the Dark Order (John Silver/Alex Reynolds are in at #15 to complete the field. Some rapid fire eliminations leave us with Fenix, Pac, Silver and Boy, leaving us with three teams over four entrants. Silver is almost tossed but manages to hang on with one hand and Fenix has to do the same. Pac and Silver slug it out with Silver kicking him up against the ropes but missing a charge into the snap German suplex.

Pac tosses Silver to the apron and Fenix walks the rope to kick him in the head for the elimination. Boy can barely get up but he manages to duck Pac’s kick to the head and low bridge him to the floor. That leaves Fenix vs. Boy in the staredown with Boy being knocked through the ropes to the floor in a hurry. Fenix hits a heck of a flip dive but Boy is right back with a clothesline back inside. There’s the poisonrana but Fenix kicks him in the head and tosses him out for the win at 26:47.

Rating: C+. I’m never sure how to rate these but they kept things moving quickly enough to keep it from being boring. That’s the key to something like this as while the ring got too full more than once, it was cleared out in a hurry near the end, which is what matters most. Fenix and Pac winning is the right call and it’s rather impressive that they are such a good team despite being thrown together. Good enough stuff here and the right team won.

Paul Wight says the big signing is here and gives us a hint: no one can out work him.

Diamond Dallas Page and Al Snow are here.

We recap Ryo Mizunami vs. Hikaru Shida for the Women’s Title. Mizunami was ready to retire until she showed up at Double Or Nothing and it revitalized her career. She won the #1 contenders tournament and is ready to go for the title.

Women’s Title: Hikaru Shida vs. Ryo Mizunami

Shida is defending and gets knocked into the corner early on. The chops have Shida in trouble but she sends Ryo face first into the buckle and hits her own chops. Ryo chops away even more until Shida sends her into the corner for a running knee. Another running knee gets two but Ryo counters the running knee off the chair into a powerbomb over the barricade.

Back in and Ryo hammers away until Shida gets in a kick to the face out of the corner. The missile dropkick gets two on Ryo so Shida takes her to the ramp for a sunset driver. Shida smiles a lot and takes her back inside for two off a suplex. They strike it out until Ryo nails a few clotheslines to take over. Shida hits some running knees to the face but can’t cover. They grab hands and get up for another slugout until Ryo hits a Rock Bottom.

The guillotine legdrop gets two so Shida snaps off a straitjacket suplex, with Ryo popping back up for a screaming clothesline. Another running knee sets up the Falcon Arrow for two on Ryo and a poke to the eye sets up a small package for the same. The running knee connects but Ryo reverses into a rollup for two more. Shida hits an enziguri for two more and she tries another Falcon Arrow…which looked to be countered into a DDT but seemed to be swung into a Rock Bottom to plant Rio instead. Another running knee gets two on Ryo, followed by another knee to retain the title at 15:46.

Rating: C-. I’m so sick of Shida with her 917 running knees offense mixed in with some Falcon Arrows to spice it up a bit. She has been champion for almost ten months now and it feels like she has had the same match throughout her reign. I didn’t get into this for the most part as a good bit of the work was sloppy and the abundance of knees had me begging for the thing to be over. Shida needs to drop the title almost immediately and the sooner it is to Baker, the better.

Post match Nyla Rose, Britt Baker and Rebel run in to jump Shida and Ryo but Thunder Rosa makes the save, likely setting up a six woman on Dynamite.

Miro and Kip Sabian jump Chuck Taylor and Orange Cassidy in the back but demand the music be played anyway. Taylor is busted open thanks to going into some glass and is dragged to the ring as Miro calls him Charles over and over. Miro offers him the chance to let it stop but Taylor says ring the bell.

Miro/Kip Sabian vs. Chuck Taylor/Orange Cassidy

There is no Cassidy and Taylor is clotheslined down in a hurry. Miro rubs Taylor’s blood on his chest and Sabian is in with a missile dropkick. Chuck is sent into the corner for a boot to the face and another dropkick from Sabian makes it worse. Taylor gets in a shot to the face as Cassidy staggers to the ring. Well part of the way as he falls down on the stage on the way there.

Cassidy pops up to Orange Punch Miro and Taylor knocks Sabian down, allowing Cassidy to get the hot tag. Everything breaks down with Cassidy hitting a dive onto Sabian but getting caught in a fireman’s carry gutbuster. The Deathly Hallows is broken up and Taylor tags himself in for a Beach Break/double stomp combination. A piledriver gets two on Sabian with Miro having to make a save.

Cassidy puts his hands in his pockets for the slow motion kicks to Miro (of course), who kicks him down (as you should). Cassidy is back with the Stundog Millionaire but is driven into Penelope Ford to knock her to the floor. Miro kicks Cassidy in the head and throws Sabian back inside so Miro can make the tag. The jumping kick to the face sets up Game Over to finish Taylor at 7:54.

Rating: D+. Now can we please move them both on to ANYTHING else? Miro getting the win makes sense, but I hope this isn’t setting up some Miro vs. Cassidy showdown. The match needed to be this short after everything else has felt long and thankfully they didn’t do anything stupid here like giving Cassidy a fluke pin. They need to move on though if they want to make Miro into something important as it isn’t happening against Taylor and Cassidy.

MJF and Chris Jericho aren’t happy with their loss so on Wednesday it is the Inner Circle War Council, when changes are coming. MJF seems to suggest that Jericho may be in trouble.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Hangman Page. Hardy wants to be Page’s manager/agent but Page tricked him into signing a contract where the winner gets the loser’s income for the first three months of the year. I’ve heard far worse ideas.

Matt Hardy vs. Hangman Page

Private Party is here with Hardy. Page ducks a right hand and hammers away in the corner as commentary talks about how Hardy has been wrestling almost as long as Page has been alive. There’s a fall away slam to Matt and they head outside with Page hitting an ax handle off part of the stage. Back in and Matt bails straight to the floor again, where he sends Page’s arm into the post.

The hand is wrapped around the post and sent into the steps with commentary wisely pointing out that it’s the Buckshot Lariat arm. Back in and Hardy bites the finger before bending the fingers back again. Page fights up and uses the right hand without thinking, which makes it even worse. The springboard clothesline puts Hardy down but the bad arm keeps Page down too. Hardy grabs a Twist of Fate on the floor and Page has to beat the count at nine.

Back in and Hardy German suplexes him off the top for two but Page is back up with a shot to the face. A clothesline puts them both on the floor as the fans are VERY into Hardy. Page is up first with a moonsault to take Hardy down again, followed by a sliding clothesline back inside. Deadeye is broken up and Hardy takes him down with a neckbreaker. Hardy catches him on top with a Razor’s Edge powerbomb for two more but the Twist of Fate is countered into the Deadeye.

That draws up Private Party for the distraction with Page having to get rid of both of them. The Buckshot Lariat is countered into the Side Effect (that looked good) and the Twist of Fate gets two (with commentary spoiling the kickout by shouting about how Matt is going to do it). Cue the Dark Order (all six members of them, which is not evening the odds as Excalibur calls it) to take care of Private Party, allowing Page to hit the Buckshot Lariat for the pin at 14:57.

Rating: C+. This was a better match than I would have bet on, though the fans at ringside screaming for Hardy every two seconds were rather pesky. They went with the only result they could have chosen so at least nothing went too far here. Page with the Dark Order intrigues me, but I’d rather they keep it this way instead of him joining in full.

Post match Dark Order and Page celebrate with some beer.

Video on the Face Of The Revolution ladder match for a TNT Title shot on Wednesday and with a mystery entrant.

Max Castor vs. Lance Archer vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Penta El Cero Miedo vs. Scorpio Sky vs. ???

Ladder match and the mystery entrant is…Ethan Page. Eh works for me. It’s a brawl to start with various people being knocked outside. Archer grabs a ladder to hit Cody in the bad shoulder and hit Sky and Castor in the head. Penta kicks Archer down and hits the Sling Blade but gets caught with by Sky’s German suplex. Castor comes in to clear the ring but here is Jack Evans with the boom box, only to have Dark Order’s 10 run out to take care of him (because a six man ladder match needs another story going on).

The ladder is set up and Page kicks Cody down to get rid of him. Castor starts hitting everyone with the boom box, including a few shots to Cody’s bad shoulder. Penta uses the ladder for a ramp to flip dive onto Cody and Castor. Archer dropkicks Penta to the floor but Page is back in to tie Archer up in the ladder. Page can’t hit a tilt-a-whirl side slam on Sky so he settles for Splash Mountain to drop Sky onto the ladder onto Archer.

Said ladder is bridged between the ring and the barricade so let’s bring in another one. Cody has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Penta off the ladder but Penta is right back up with the Canadian Destroyer to drive Cody into the bridged ladder. That’s enough for Cody to be taken to the back (or at least to the entrance of the tunnel) as Sky pulls Castor off the ladder. Castor and Sky are up at the same time but Archer and Page join them. Everyone gets knocked off with Penta being up first for some kicking.

Sky pulls Penta down for the big crash, leaving Page and Castor to slug it out on the ladders again. Castor hits a huge sunset bomb to bring him down but Sky puts Castor onto the ladder in a crash. The frog splash crushes Castor onto the ladder and everyone is down again. Archer catapults Sky onto the ladder but then has to pull him back down. A jumping knee knocks Sky off the apron and through another ladder at ringside to put him way down.

Penta is back up to clean house but here’s Cody to whip a bunch of people with the belt. Archer suplexes Cody onto the bad arm and Castor adds an elbow drop off of the ladder to keep Cody down. Archer shoves the ladder over to take out Penta and Castor, followed by a string of chokeslams. The Black Out onto the ladder knocks Castor silly but Page powerbombs Archer off of the ladder.

That brings Jake Roberts in for a clothesline to Page but Penta kicks Roberts down. Cody is back up with the Cody….uh, slap to the face this time, to bring Penta off the ladder. Penta is right back up to take Cody off of the ladder but Sky cleans house with a chair. Cody and Sky slug it out on top of the ladder, with Sky being smart enough to pull on the bad arm. Cody gets knocked down and Sky wins at 23:16.

Rating: B. This was the spot fest that it needed to be and I’m rather pleased with Sky winning. Not just because I picked him to win, but also because he is the kind of smooth wrestler who can have a good match against anyone. Now they need to actually do something with him, because it feels like the kind of spot we have been in with him more than once before.

It’s time for the big signing and….yeah it’s Christian Cage. Cool moment as he was just in the Rumble, but dang I wanted to see Edge and Christian vs. the Usos. Christian signs without saying or doing anything else.

We recap Sting/Darby Allin vs. Team Taz. Allin has been getting on Team Taz’s nerves so they beat him up multiple times. Then Sting showed up to even the odds, meaning it’s cinematic match time.

Team Taz vs. Darby Allin/Sting

We go cinematic in a warehouse, with Allin hitching a ride on the back of a truck ala Back to the Future. Sting and Allin have an army of people in face paint to accompany them and we’re actually in a ring. Allin gets thrown over the top so he bounces off of a wall and back into the ring (Tony: “LIKE SPIDER!”) to drop Cage. They’re out of the ring in a hurry with Cage powerbombing one of the masked men against the apron. Cage drags Allin away from the ring as Sting hits the Stinger Splash on Starks.

A big camera zoom takes us across the building to Allin slipping out of a powerbomb attempt. Cage throws him through some doors as another Stinger Splash hits Starks. They leave the ring too with Sting grabbing the bat to chase Starks away. Starks says Sting is nothing without the bat so Sting throws it down and beats on Starks without it. We go back to Cage picking up Allin for a suplex and walking him up a flight of stairs (because he can just do that).

Back to Starks beating up Sting and throwing a barrel at his knees. Cage hits Starks in the head by mistake though and Allin is back with a bottle to Cage’s head. A double chokeslam puts Cage through a table and there’s a Coffin Drop off of a post to take Allin down. Cue Powerhouse Hobbs and Hook to beat Allin down and a big toss sends him through a window. Sting gets kicked in the ribs as JR says so much for this being a tag match.

With Sting in trouble, Allin pops up and throw him a bat (across the building and down a floor), which Sting breaks over Cage’s back. Allin then dives off of a balcony through Cage through part of the floor, leaving Starks and Sting to go back to the ring. The Stinger Splash hits exposed buckle and Starks spears him for two. Back up and Starks misses an elbow, setting up the Scorpion Death Drop to finish Starks at 13:49.

Rating: B. Your taste is going to entirely depend on what you think of cinematic matches so this could be quite the range of ratings. I’m not wild on the idea, but I would absolutely prefer this to a regular match for Sting. Starks taking the fall is frustrating but this is kind of a special circumstance. I know Sting isn’t going to be a regular wrestler and while he didn’t look bad here, he doesn’t need to be doing this very often.

Double Or Nothing is in May.

We run down the Dynamite card.

We recap Jon Moxley vs. Kenny Omega in an exploding barbed wire deathmatch. Moxley won’t leave Omega alone so he is picking this as a way to get rid of Moxley for good. Atsushi Onita talks about how dangerous the match is and violence is promised.

AEW World Title: Jon Moxley vs. Kenny Omega

Omega is defending and there is barbed wire everywhere. If you touch the barbed wire ropes something explodes, and if we go thirty minutes EVERYTHING EXPLODES. Don Callis in on commentary and the referee is in something resembling a hazmat suit. Moxley takes a shot of whiskey during the Big Match Intros and we’re ready to go. They take their time going to the lockup and Moxley blocks a drive into a barbed wire board in the corner. They chop it out until Omega grabs a headlock and Moxley can’t even suplex his way out of it.

Neither is able to send the other into the barbed wire board so Moxley sends him outside through the one section with no barbed wire. A Russian legsweep with a barbed wire baseball bat takes Omega down and there’s a kendo stick shot to the back. Back in and Omega throws powder into the eyes, meaning Moxley needs to blindly swing the barbed wire bat. Moxley is sent into the barbed wire for the first explosion for two.

Some kendo stick shots have Moxley in trouble and the Kitaro Crusher through a trashcan gets two. Back up and the rather bloody Moxley is sent into the barbed wire board in the corner, setting up Omega’s middle rope moonsault for two. Schiavone: “We have exactly twenty minutes before this ring explodes.” Moxley sends him into the ropes for an explosion and then dropkicks him into them for another.

Back up and Moxley suplexes Omega through another barbed wire board in the corner but a Paradigm Shift onto a barbed wire chair is blocked. Moxley sends Omega flying with a German suplex and a side slam onto the barbed wire chair has Omega in a lot of pain. The barbed wire is wrapped around Moxley’s arm but the running lariat is countered into a dragon suplex.

The V Trigger gets two and Moxley drives him into the wire, with the explosion going off in Omega’s face. They head to the apron for a slugout until Moxley hits a Paradigm Shift through the barbed wire board for a double explosion. They’re both down for a long time until Moxley pulls the wire off of the board. They get back in and we get a noise signaling that we are ten minutes away from the big explosions.

Omega gets in a low blow and there’s a V Trigger in the corner. Make that two in a row and the One Winged Angel gets two as Moxley puts his foot on the ropes for the explosion (clever). Cue the Good Brothers to beat on Moxley and an exploding barbed wire bat to the face gets two. The One Winged Angel through the chair retains the title at 25:09.

Rating: D+. For a barbed wire street fight, it was pretty good (assuming you don’t find “yeah he used barbed wire, but now he’s going to use MORE barbed wire” to be a rather dumb idea), but for something built around THE RING MIGHT EXPLODE, this was rather disappointing. The match was built around the danger and I was laughing when some sparklers and smoke went off. Throw in how ridiculous the barbed wire stuff was and this was horrible. Make it a regular barbed wire match and it’s FAR better, but the explosions being such a joke killed it.

Post match the beatdown stays on as we’re told the ring is going to explode no matter what because THERE IS NO FAIL SAFE. As I try to figure out why that would be a feature, Omega handcuffs Moxley’s hands behind his back and the big beatdown ensues as we kill off the last of the thirty minutes.

The one minute countdown is on and the handcuffed Moxley is in the ring. Eddie Kingston comes in to try and get him out….and a bit of pyro goes of around the ring. The pyro from the corners was smaller than what would come up during Diesel’s entrance and the stuff at ringside was even weaker. This was pathetic, and Kingston actually selling it makes things even worse. I actually can’t remember the last time I saw something so disappointing and it is going to be a rather black eye for AEW for a good while.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts to the show but I’m rather disappointed by the whole thing. It didn’t have anything that was must see, it felt rather long and then the ending was an all time letdown. Christian signing is cool and the cinematic match was good, but this is going to be remembered for one or two things and that’s it. They went too far with the build and now it is going to cause them trouble.

The ending was a good example of one of AEW’s biggest problems: they have to do too much. The main event ended with a One Winged Angel THROUGH A CHAIR. You could put Moxley on the shelf for three months with that and it would have been fine. But no, we need to (allegedly) blow up the ring because a move you could say broke his neck isn’t enough. That’s something they do far too often and it hurts them. I’m really disappointed and I don’t like that feeling with what is usually one of the best products out there.

If you ever needed proof that AEW needs someone to say no sometimes, this is it. One of the things that a lot of people were saying was it was going to be ridiculous and they were hyping it up too much because that’s over the top. Well this is what we wound up with because AN EXPLODING RING is kind of a stupid idea. Tony Khan needed to say no and just let them have the barbed wire match and move on. They’ll be fine in a bit after this, but this was a step back for them and that is a new situation for them to be in.

Results

Young Bucks b. Chris Jericho/MJF – Meltzer Driver to Jericho

Rey Fenix/Pac won the Casino Battle Royale last eliminating Jungle Boy

Hikaru Shida b. Ryo Mizunami – Running knee

Miro/Kip Sabian b. Chuck Taylor/Orange Cassidy – Game Over to Taylor

Hangman Page b. Matt Hardy – Buckshot Lariat

Scorpio Sky won the Face Of The Revolution ladder match

Sting/Darby Allin b. Team Taz – Scorpion Death Drop to Starks

Kenny Omega b. Jon Moxley – One Winged Angel through a chair

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Revolution 2021 Preview

It has been a few months now and in AEW’s world, that means it is time for another pay per view. There is something very, very refreshing about that as I don’t need a pay per view every month and given that AEW’s worst ever pay per view was still completely watchable, we should be in for something good here. The card isn’t the strongest but they know how to execute so let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Riho/Thunder Rosa vs. Britt Baker/Rebel

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Baker was eliminated from the #1 contenders tournament like it was absolutely nothing, but then again the women’s division has been kind of a mess. I can’t picture a world in which Baker is not Women’s Champion before the end of the year though and I think that road might be starting sooner than expected.

That being said, I’ll go with Riho/Rosa here, as AEW is likely going to want to reheat Riho after her tournament loss. Baker needs it too, but I’m not sure I can picture them going with her over some of the other options. Baker is going to be over no matter what because she is so awesome at so many different things, though I don’t think that equals a win here. Riho and Rosa win, hopefully pinning Rebel if they have to.

Women’s Title: Hikaru Shida(c) vs. Ryo Mizunami

This is the result of the weeks long international #1 contenders tournament (because reasons) and the big result is a match that was set up years ago….in another promotion….in Japan. That’s about all of the explanation we have been given, as Mizunami has barely been around the company, but what does that matter when she has done some great things elsewhere that we might not have seen or even heard of in the first place?

I’ll take Shida here, even though her title reign is LONG overdue and she needs to drop the thing already. However, I’m not sure Mizunami is the best choice as we don’t know anything about her other than she and Shida were once partners. This match should be fine, but it isn’t something I’m going to have that much interest in given what we have had to build it up so far.

Miro/Kip Sabian vs. Orange Cassidy/Chuck Taylor

This feud has been going for a few months now and I’m still not quite sure I get the appeal. Miro has lost any momentum he had on the way into the company, Sabian has pretty much disappeared, Taylor is Taylor and Cassidy was upset that someone was forced to say they weren’t friends. How that sets up an important pay per view match is beyond me, but that’s what we have here.

For the sake of hope, I’ll go with Sabian/Miro here, as the two of them really need a win to build up some momentum. It helps that they have gotten away from the gaming thing for the most part but that doesn’t exactly leave them with much to go on. This feud has been a rather dull way to go but AEW seems to love all of them (some are a good bit more valuable than others) and here we are. Miro and Sabian win, as they certainly need it more.

Casino Tag Team Royale

What is with this company’s gambling obsession? Anyway, this is basically a tag team Royal Rumble for a future title shot and they have fifteen teams announced so far. Battle royals (and they have a lot of them around here) are hard to predict as you can get anyone into the title shot in a hurry, which makes them kind of hard to predict. That means you can go a lot of different ways so it’s kind of a guess as to who is winning.

I’ll take Rey Fenix/Pac to win, as that squash on Wednesday was more than enough to make me think they are next in line for a shot at the titles. If nothing else, watching those two beat each other up with the dives can be rather entertaining television and it isn’t like a lot of the teams have a realistic chance in the first place. Pac and Fenix win, but this could go in a lot of different directions.

Tag Team Titles: Young Bucks(c) vs. Chris Jericho/MJF

This started off as an interesting feud but then fell apart in a hurry. The whole thing with the Bucks’ father (and their insult to Jericho that makes them sound rather dumb once you think about it) wasn’t good but it’s all they have. You would think Jericho and MJF could talk anything into being interesting but for some reason they haven’t been able to make it work. It could be the Bucks being the least likable faces in a long time, but the match should work out better than the build.

Of course the Bucks win here, as it’s hard to imagine them losing those titles for a very long time to come. The Bucks are major stars in AEW and it makes sense to have them in the title picture. Jericho and MJF seem destined to be on a collision course somewhere down the road and I can’t imagine them winning or even needing the titles to make that story work. The Bucks retain here, as they should.

Face Of The Revolution Ladder Match

This is for a TNT Title shot because, much like kidnappings, battle royals, tournaments and gambling, this company loves ladder matches for title shots. The big question here is who fills in the final spot and I have no idea who that might be. Christian seems to be the fancy pick at the moment, but I don’t want to see someone with a history of concussions in a match this violent.

As for a winner, I’m going with some instinct and picking Scorpio Sky, though you never know with something like this. It’s hard to predict a match when you don’t even have the full field but this makes for a nice build for the drama alone. I’m not overly sure about Sky winning, but he certainly makes for an interesting option and I’ll go with that for the win here.

Hangman Page vs. Matt Hardy

This is for the loser’s income for the first three months of the year and my goodness I cannot bring myself to care about Hardy. The character is interesting enough but as soon as I hear the Hardy name attached, all of the positives are overshadowed. The match itself should work as Page is charismatic enough to get around anything, but fighting over money with Hardy sounds like the result of a bad lawsuit instead of an angle.

Again for the sake of my sanity I’ll hope for Page to win here, as there is little reason to go with Hardy. Page having some more money and Hardy being broke or needing more clients is a better story, though I’m not sure how far anything is going to take these two. Hardy doesn’t need to win here but I’m a bit scared that he might anyway, just due to his star power and name value. Still though, Page should win.

Sting/Darby Allin vs. Team Taz

It’s cinematic time and that is the best thing they could do with Sting. I know he handled the powerbomb well enough (as in he was perfectly fine a week later) but he really doesn’t need to be in a full on match. The cinematic matches aren’t my favorite but if they have to have Sting wrestle (and it is hard not to), this is absolutely the right way to go about doing it.

I’m actually not sure who to pick here, as Team Taz needs the win more, but you don’t want to have either the debuting legend or the champion losing. It really could go either way but I’ll take Sting and Allin to win as they make for the better story. Sting can put someone over later and Allin is going to have a new #1 contender so he isn’t going to need to deal with taking a loss here.

AEW World Title: Kenny Omega(c) vs. Jon Moxley

When Omega announced this as the Exploding Barbed Wire Deathmatch, I completely expected him to laugh and say “nah I’m kidding, it’s a cage match”. This is as over the top as you can get and feels like they are doing it because Tony Khan looked at his tape collection and decided what he felt like doing today. I get the reason for the stipulation in the end, but there are a bunch of ways to get there without going this direction.

Omega wins here, as the entire point of the match would seem to be to blow Moxley up so he goes away while his wife has their baby. That’s all well and good and the match will probably have some good drama/violence/action, but I’d be curious to know how many people aren’t going to watch or pay or pay for the show because of how ridiculous the stipulation is. I know it isn’t a majority, but there are going to be some out there because this is pretty insane and not in the best way.

Overall Thoughts

AEW has done an excellent job in their first year and a half because this show isn’t very appealing match by match but it’s an AEW pay per view and therefore it has my interest. They have done rather well at pay per views over their lifespan and the reputation is enough to carry this thing. That’s a rare place to be and if things here even exceed expectations by a little bit, everything should be more than fine.

 

Oh and the big signing.  Eh play it safe and go with Kurt Angle.

 

 

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No Mercy 2006 (2021 Redo): The Benefit Of Low Expectations

No Mercy 2006
Date: October 8, 2006
Location: RBC Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 9,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re back to the pay per views and this time around it’s another pretty low level one with one of the weaker Smackdown shows. The main event, as of two days ago, is now a four way with King Booker defending his title against Finlay, Batista and Bobby Lashley. Other than that we have Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio in a Falls Count Anywhere match as the second biggest thing on the card. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the four way, with everyone saying it is time for no mercy. It’s not a good sign when there is nothing else to talk about.

Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms

Still non-title because the Cruiserweight Title still doesn’t matter. Helms is the hometown boy and Cole goes over their history and tries to put over the idea of the match being the battle of North Carolina. They fight over a headlock to start until Hardy shoulders him down. Matt’s takedown gives us back to back standouts as the fans are behind Hardy. Helms takes him into the corner and stomps away but Hardy is right back with a clothesline.

They head to the floor with Matt hitting a quick slingshot dive to take him out again. Back in and a neckbreaker into a backbreaker puts Hardy down and a super Russian legsweep gives Helms two. Helms grabs a Codebreaker for two more and it’s time to crank on the arm some more. Hardy fights up with a reverse DDT before winning the slugout to take over. Some clotheslines set up the bulldog out of the corner for two and the middle rope legdrop gets the same.

Helms comes back with a reverse Unprettier and then hits it twice more, only to get punched out of the air. Back to back to back Side Effects get two but Hardy’s moonsault hits knees. The Shining Wizard gets two so Hardy gets in a shot to the face and heads up top. That earns him a crotching and running Shining Wizard for two but Hardy is right back with the Twist of Fate for the quick pin.

Rating: B. This was a very nice surprise as I had no interest coming in and they had a heck of a match here. Ignoring everything about the title and how many times we have seen the match now, this was a rather good opener and I dug everything about it. Call it a hidden gem as this was one of the bigger surprises I have seen in a long time.

King Booker needs to focus but also tells William Regal that he needs help tonight. Regal is willing to help and is tasked with getting Finlay to help Booker in the four way. He’s up to the crusade.

Tag Team Titles: KC James/Idol Stevens vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

London and Kendrick are defending and Michelle McCool/Ashley Massaro are here too. Stevens hammers London in the corner but London is right back with a headscissors. Kendrick comes in to crank on the arm as JBL actually compares London and Kendrick to the Simpson Brothers. It’s off to James, who is taken down with a double clothesline and the champs hit stereo dives to the floor.

Back in and McCool offers a distraction, allowing James to shove London off the top and put him in trouble. James hammers away and hands it back to Stevens for a double underhook crank on the mat. London breaks free and goes for the tag but Stevens pulls Kendrick to the floor. The second attempt works a bit better though and it’s Kendrick coming in to clean house.

London hits a dive onto Stevens, leaving James to superplex Kendrick down for a near fall. McCool offers a distraction so the illegal Stevens can hit a chokebreaker to give James two on Kendrick. London breaks up a double suplex and launches Kendrick for a double dropkick. Sliced Bread into a step up shooting star press finishes James to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. These guys work well together and London/Kendrick have turned into the latest awesome young high fliers. That’s the kind of thing that is always going to have a place in the wrestling world and they have looked great for a long time now. They could use some fresh competition but they have earned a spot on a pay per view like this one.

William Regal goes to find Finlay but finds Vito in a dress jumping rope (Regal: “You’re sweating like Vince McMahon in a church.”). Vito pulls up his dress to reveal the thong, freaking out Regal (who is jumping rope and singing London Bridge) and making him fall into the concession stand.

Teddy Long is in the ring with a cake and a huge birthday present for the birthday boy…..The Miz! Cue Miz, who shouts a lot of HOO-RAH’s, but Long has something for him: that would be Layla, who is barely concealing her rather limited clothing. She has Miz sit down and the lap dance is on, then blindfolds him (with Miz talking about whips and chains). Cue the most obvious payoff in the world, freaking Miz out as he sees who is dancing in front of him next. Layla and Big Dick Johnson dance together as Miz runs.

MVP vs. ???

This is MVP’s in-ring debut and he has the big inflatable tunnel for his entrance. Before the match, MVP talks about how great he is, though the fans chant POWER RANGER at his offense. The opponent is a rather skinny man named Marty Garner, who is slapped down before the bell. MVP takes him down and rides him a bit, followed by a snapmare of all things for two. The fans call this boring and MVP snaps a bit, setting up the yet to be named Playmaker for the fast pin. JBL really doesn’t seem to like him.

Regal is in a towel after the shower but Vito comes in to freak him out again. That sends Regal running off with the towel falling off. Teddy Long isn’t pleased and puts Regal in a match for later. This was a bit of a problem as Regal’s penis was accidentally exposed for a split second during the segment and WWE had to apologize.

We recap Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Kennedy isn’t scared of Undertaker’s power, as we put a completely fresh spin on an Undertaker feud.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Non-title and for some reason we wait about thirty seconds for the referee to ask if they are ready. Undertaker charges at him to start and sends the arm into the corner. That’s enough to send Kennedy outside for a breather so Undertaker sends the arm into the post this time. Back in and Old School is countered with an armdrag, which commentary is sure has never happened before.

Kennedy stomps away in the corner but walks into a Downward Spiral for two. Undertaker is knocked to the apron though and Kennedy drives him into the apron to take over again. Another shot knocks him off the apron again and a DDT out of the ropes catches Undertaker on the way back in. The running crotch attack to the back of the neck gets two and Kennedy slowly pounds on him.

Kennedy grabs a piledriver, which freaks commentary out, partially because they call it a Tombstone. That’s good for a pair of twos so it’s off to a chinlock to keep Undertaker in trouble. Undertaker is right back up to win the slugout and there’s the jumping clothesline. Snake Eyes into the big boot gets two but Kennedy grabs the referee to block the chokeslam.

Kennedy’s neckbreaker gets two but Undertaker is right back with the chokeslam for two. Back up and Kennedy sends him into the exposed buckle, setting up the Kenton Bomb for two more. Kennedy goes to get his title and leave but Undertaker takes it away and hits him for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was getting good until the fairly weak ending, but I will absolutely take that over a champion losing again. They could come back with a rematch in a few weeks, though it isn’t like the title is doing anything for Kennedy in the first place. Undertaker did give him a good bit here and that’s always nice to see when there is a chance to put someone over.

Post match Undertaker beats up the referee to blow off some steam.

We recap Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Chavo claimed that Rey was sponging off of the Guerrero name (fair) and cost him the World Title. The feud ensued and this time it’s Falls Count Anywhere.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo and it is Falls Count Anywhere. Chavo elbows him down to start but Rey slips out of a rollup and hammers away. The EDDIE chants begin as they head up top and then both crash down for the double knockdown. That’s enough of the ring so they fight up to the entrance with Rey having to hurricanrana his way out of a powerbomb.

Rey knocks him into the barricade but is quickly Gory Bombed onto the same barricade to put them both down again. Chavo is draped over another barricade for a clothesline to the back of the head but Chavo sends him head first into some hockey boards for two. There’s a head first swing into a chair and it’s time to fight into the crowd.

Rey gets in a few shots to the face and runs off the barricade to hit the seated senton for two more. They fight towards the ring, with the camera being knocked around quite a bit each time. It’s finally into a bit of a clearing for a 619, setting up a crossbody off of a tunnel to give Rey the pin.

Rating: C-. This was only so good though they needed to have a more violent match/brawl like this one. Chavo is somehow managing to overcome a career that has not seen him as a major player for the most part so it was nice to see him working this well in such a role. That being said, it was a lot of walking around and punching, so they were only going to get so far.

Post match Vickie is REALLY not pleased.

William Regal vs. ???

The mystery opponent is….Chris Benoit, who is making a rather long awaited return. Benoit drives him into the corner to start so Regal start in on the arm. A headlock takeover has Regal down but Benoit fights up and wristlocks his way to freedom. Back up and the test of strength lets Regal bridge on his neck and then flip backwards, only to get caught in a bodyscissors.

Regal steps on the arm to get out so Benoit chops him into the rolling German suplexes. A headbutt busts them both open and Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two. They head to the apron to tease the super German suplex but Regal knocks him out to the floor instead. That’s fine with Benoit, who tries the Sharpshooter but gets kicked in the face for the block. Something like a hybrid dragon sleeper/abdominal stretch has Benoit in more trouble but he slips out and hammers on Regal’s cut.

Some suplexes send Benoit flying but the Regal Stretch attempt is countered into a Crossface attempt, which sends Regal to the ropes. Back up and Regal ties the legs up to put on a dragon sleeper for some hard neck cranking. That doesn’t last long as Benoit grabs a dragon suplex and puts on the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: B. These two beat each other up for a long while and it if had some more time, it could have been a classic. Benoit hasn’t missed a beat and I don’t think anyone was expecting anything else. These two have always worked very well together and they made it work here again. Heck of a match and it’s very nice to see Benoit back.

In the back, King Booker yells at Regal for not finding Finlay and doesn’t want to hear excuses. Finlay comes up to say he’s here to fight for the title so Booker yells at him as he leaves. Booker yells at Regal and tells him to get out, including a slap to the face. Regal drops him with one left hand.

We recap the main event. King Booker is World Champion and was scheduled to defend against Bobby Lashley. Then Teddy Long added Batista and Finlay to make it a four way earlier this week.

Batista and Bobby Lashley will see each other out there.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Batista

Booker, with Queen Sharmell, is defending and it is one fall to a finish. Finlay gets knocked outside to start so Booker gets double teamed in the corner until Finlay runs back in for the save. Lashley is tossed as well, leaving Batista to take the double teaming for a change. Finlay and Batista head to the floor so Lashley comes back in with a spinebuster for two on Booker.

Batista takes Lashley’s place so Finlay and Booker double team him down again. An elbow to the face drops Batista but Finlay jumps Booker, sending JBL over the edge. Finlay sends him face first into the apron and then sits on his chest for two back inside. Batista comes back in and gets caught in a Fujiwara armbar. A Samoan drop doesn’t get Batista out of trouble though as Finlay switches to a keylock, followed by a half crab to Lashley.

That’s broken up as well and Booker kicks Finlay in the face for two. It’s Lashley up with a gorilla press gutbuster for two on Finlay. That draws out the Leprechaun for a low blow, setting up Finlay’s Shillelagh shot to Lashley. Batista is back in with a Jackhammer to Booker but has to knock Finlay down. We’re down to Batista vs. Lashley, with the former nailing a fast spear for two.

Batista is busted open off of what might have been an accidental collision so Lashley hits him with a spinebuster. Finlay pulls Batista to the floor, leaving Booker to grab the Book End for two on Lashley. A kick to the face gets two more but it’s Batista back in for spinebusters all around. The Batista Bomb hits Finlay but Lashley spears Batista, allowing Booker to pin Finlay to retain.

Rating: B-. It was a smart move to let them all get in there and do their things in shorter bursts than trying to have something coherent for all four of them. Booker retaining is fine, even if it seems pretty clear that he is just keeping the title war for Batista. This was a well put together match and they went with the best way out of it that they had available. Nice job here, especially for a match with about two days’ announcement.

Overall Rating: B. Where the heck did this come from? This was in and out in a hurry at just over two and a half hours with three very good matches included. WWE has a strong track record of surprises when it comes to shows like this, as the card looked terrible coming in. Maybe it is the lack of expectations but what we got here worked rather well and that was a great surprise.

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Smackdown – October 6, 2006: I’m Not Sure What Else They Can Do

Smackdown
Date: October 6, 2006
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Attendance: 5,585
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for No Mercy and I’m not sure what else there is to set up for the show. The card has been set in stone for a good while now and while there are still a few things that could be firmed up, everything else is ready. Hopefully they keep the interest up, though a boost would certainly help things out a lot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

King Booker, with Queen Sharmell, is ready to make Bobby Lashley pick Batista as his poison tonight.

Bobby Lashley is cool with that and picks Finlay as Booker’s poison. No matter what happens though, nothing changes for Sunday.

Rey Mysterio/Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero

Take two feuds and mix them together. Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo. Rey wants Chavo to start but gets Helms instead, meaning it’s quickly off to Hardy to hammer away. A springboard ax handle to Helms’ shoulder connects but he spinebusters Rey down to take over. Now Chavo is willing to come in for a few cheap shots before handing it back to Helms. That means a drop toehold into the corner and everything breaks down in a hurry.

Helms hits a Codebreaker on Hardy and grabs a triangle choke, followed by some stomping from Chavo. The Side Effect gets Matt out of trouble and it’s the lukewarm tag to Rey to clean house. There’s the big kick to Chavo’s head and Poetry in Motion sets up the hurricanrana into the 619. Rey Drops The Dime and pins Helms, with commentary not even throwing out a token mention of the Cruiserweight Title.

Rating: C. Totally run of the mill tag match here but it worked out fine for what it was supposed to do. I’m still not thrilled with the Cruiserweight Title being the most worthless belt I’ve seen in years. Hardy can’t go after the thing and there is no mention of someone wanting to be champion, so the little value it already has goes lower and lower every day.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show, which is a rather obvious excuse to show off….yeah I think you get this one.

Elijah Burke vs. Tatanka

Sylvester Terkay is here with Burke, who praises himself before the match. Terkay offers a distraction and Burke gets in a cheap shot, only to get chopped down in a hurry. Burke gets in a knee and hits a dropkick in the corner, followed by a driving shoulder to keep Tatanka in trouble. The running Vader Bomb elbow gets two and the chinlock goes on. Tatanka fights up with a flapjack and the Papoose To Go, followed by the top rope chop to the head for two more. Terkay offers a distraction though and Burke hammers away, allowing Terkay to get in a cheap shot. Burke hits a Stroke for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re doing the right things with Burke and Terkay here but nothing is clicking. Burke has the charisma and Terkay is the muscle, which is a formula that has worked for years but it isn’t working for them. Granted having to cheat to beat Tatanka isn’t going to make things better for them. This Tatanka gets cheated story needs to wrap up too, as it is approaching a few months now.

Trailer for the Marine.

King Booker asks Finlay if he will lay down for the king, but Finlay asks William Regal if he would do the same. Regal says of course he would, but Finlay isn’t going to do it. Booker: “DON’T DO THIS! DON’T DO THIS!”

King Booker vs. Finlay

Non-title and Queen Sharmell is here too. Sharmell offers an early distraction so Booker can jump him from behind for an early two. Booker hammers away but Finlay shows him how it’s really done and grabs the chinlock. Some forearms keep Booker down and there’s a stomp to the ribs, followed by an elbow to the jaw.

Booker gets sent shoulder first into the post and Finlay grabs another chinlock as he continues with the simple yet effective offense. They exchange forearms until Booker drops him with a side kick. Cue the Leprechaun with a mouse to scare Sharmell and the distraction lets Finlay get in a Shillelagh shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but that wasn’t the point. This was about showing Booker as a bit weaker than you might expect and they had a short match to prove the point. You don’t need to do much more than that here, though Finlay continues to look completely comfortable against anyone in there. I know he isn’t going to be a long term main eventer, but he’s really good in the brawling enforcer role.

Bobby Lashley vs. Batista

We get the big staredown and handshake to start. They shove each other around and the test of strength goes nowhere. Lashley backs him into the ropes to escape a headlock and then runs Batista over with a shoulder. Batista hits a shoulder of his own but it’s way too early for the Batista Bomb. Instead Batista pulls him down into a chinlock with a bodyscissors, followed by the shoulders in the corner. A big boot cuts off Lashley’s comeback attempt but a double clothesline gives us a double knockdown. Cue Finlay to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was a bit more fun but it was exactly the same as the previous match: there was no point in trying to do anything here because the entire point was to get them in the ring and then do the DQ. There is nothing wrong with that and they did things as they were supposed to. Good enough stuff here, and Lashley hanging in there with Batista makes him look better.

Post match the beatdown is on with King Booker coming in to go after Lashley. Cue Teddy Long to say enough of this, because we’ll just make Sunday’s match a fatal four way. Dang that’s rather unfair to Lashley.

Post break Booker and Sharmell yell at Long but Batista, Finlay and Lashley come in to yell/thank Teddy as well. Long doesn’t want to hear it and makes the tag main event.

Sylvan vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Yang talks about how he likes NASCAR, cold beer and beating people up. There are no fast cars or beer around here, so that leaves a bad Roddy Piper knockoff line instead. Yang kicks him down for an early one as JBL freaks out about everything Yang related. Sylvan is back up with a clothesline and a bearhug, which is broken up in a hurry for the clothesline comeback. A missile dropkick gives Yang two and a kick to the face gets the same. Yang tries a victory roll but Sylvan stacks him up and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: D. It says a lot when even WWE seems to have given up on the Yang gimmick so soon. There is nothing to the whole thing other than a one note joke and it wasn’t that funny in the first place. Sylvan isn’t much better, but at least they have dropped the ambassador thing and are going with him as a generic foreign heel, which fits him a bit better. Not much better mind you, but it is an improvement.

Clip from the No Mercy press conference.

Here is MVP for a chat on the platform. He talks about how everything is changing but no one is ready for his debut. JBL loses it because MVP hasn’t even gotten in the ring yet.

Mr. Kennedy is in a black shirt in a black room and talks about how successful Undertaker has been through his mind games over the years. Last week Kennedy came face to face with it but he wasn’t scared. All of those plans mean nothing to him and nothing will prepare Undertaker for the devastation coming for him at No Mercy.

Michelle McCool, KC James and Idol Stevens are ready for Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Ashley Massaro.

Michelle McCool vs. Ashley Massaro

Both tag teams are here too. They trade shoulders to the ribs in the corner to start as JBL is in quite the bit of lust. Ashley hits her in the back and puts on an abdominal stretch, followed by the Boston crab. KC James pulls McCool to the ropes so Ashley tries a high crossbody, only to have Michelle roll through and grab the trunks for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, I think you get the point here and they aren’t exactly trying to hide that fact. That makes all the sense in the world but points to Ashley for being able to hang in there well enough. I know she isn’t a career wrestler but she is trying out there and you can see it even in such a short match.

Clips from the Marine premiere at Camp Pendleton.

No Mercy rundown.

King Booker/Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley/Batista

Finlay jumps Batista to start but Batista takes him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. They head outside with Batista hitting a clothesline and bringing it back inside so Lashley can come in. Booker gets the tag and walks into a suplex for two with Finlay having to make the save. They head outside again with Booker sending him into the steps, allowing Finlay to grab a chinlock. A knee to the ribs gets two on Lashley and Booker adds a basement dropkick to the face for the same.

Lashley suplexes his way out of a front facelock (Booker’s stunned face is great) but Finlay is back in with some elbows to the face. Booker takes Lashley outside again and starts striking away, followed by a crossface from Finlay back inside. Lashley powers over for the tag to Batista but Booker has the referee so we keep going (still a classic spot). A spear gets Lashley out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Batista, only to have William Regal come in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Much like the two singles matches, this wasn’t about the action itself but rather having the wrestlers in the ring before Sunday. It’s coming off like WWE has no confidence in the title match as you don’t often see two more people thrown in two days before. It should be fine, but they aren’t really hiding how B level show the four way is starting to feel.

Post match Batista cleans house and Lashley doesn’t look happy to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was the hard sell show for the pay per view and while they hit all of the bases, it still isn’t the most interesting show. No Mercy doesn’t feel like a major pay per view and there isn’t much they can do to get around that. The show wasn’t the worst and it did its job, but No Mercy isn’t an interesting show no matter how much they do on the go home effort. They were trying, but there is a limit to what can be done.

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