Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

So last year at Wrestlemania XXV, Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker had one of the best matches ever. That means it’s time for a rematch, with Michaels career on the line. That is more than big enough for a special match, to the point where it makes John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title feel that less important. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Beretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Prime is out within seconds, followed by Beretta and Croft at the same time. Henry launches Chavo out but then gets tossed by Khali. A bunch of people get together to toss Khali before Cryme Tyme gets rid of Gallows. Then Shad tosses JTG because that’s how battle royals work. Regal and Finlay slug it out for old times’ sake before everyone breaks off for fights of their own.

Masters keeps putting people in the Masterlock and is eliminated for not being that bright. Kozlov eliminates Kidd and Hart-Smith before being tossed out as well. Funaki, Goldust, Regal and Shad are out in a row, with Reks following them. Santino starts using the Cobra and thankfully is tossed out by Finlay.

Archer gets rid of Yang and is quickly dropkicked out by Tatsu (Striker continues to try and get “The Poison Fist Of The Pacific Rim” over as a nickname for Tatsu. This is because Striker is really annoying.). Knox gets to clean house for a bit but cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to get in a shillelagh shot. The Tadpole Splash hits Knox and Finlay tosses Carlito. Ryder eliminates Finlay and Knox at the same time, leaving Tatsu to kick Ryder out at 8:43.

Rating: C. It’s a battle royal to get a bunch of people on the show. They didn’t waste time here and it gave the fans something to see during the pre-show, which is about all you can ask for here. Tatsu was someone who seemed like he was ready to move forward more than once but it just never came together. It’s not like this was some big win but he was as good of a winner as you could have had.

Fantasia sings America The Beautiful. Not well but she does sing it.

The opening video talks about what it means to be at Wrestlemania and how important it is to be here. This is the big chance and the stars will seize it.

The set has something of an ancient pyramid theme with another over the ring, both of which look cool. If nothing else, I’ve always liked I Made It.

Tag Team Titles: ShoMiz vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

ShoMiz is defending and there isn’t much of a story here, save for Truth and Morrison winning a triple threat match to get the title shot. Miz and Morrison start things off with Morrison getting the better of things. Truth comes in with a top rope legdrop for two into a WHAT’S UP. It’s off to Show, who sends Truth flying with a fall away slam. What looks to be a Vader Bomb is broken up via a Morrison kick to the head, followed by Morrison’s knee to Miz’s head. Show breaks up Starship Pain though, leaving Truth’s dive to Show to fail miserably. Back in and Show KO Punches Morrison for the pin to retain at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one and it really would have been better off as a pre-show match. They didn’t even get four minutes and there is only so much you can do with the amount of time you might get on a regular TV show. ShoMiz was a fairly forgettable team and while it was nice to have the titles on the card, it’s not like this was anything remotely memorable.

Video on Wrestlemania Week, which always looks cool.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Legacy implodes as Orton has had it with the two of them screwing up and turned on them, setting up this for some revenge. DiBiase and Rhodes go after him to start and it doesn’t go well early on. Orton gets smart by dividing and conquering but walks into a dropkick from DiBiase. The double teaming is on with both of them taking turns to punch Orton while the other holds him back. There’s a double suplex to put Orton down but he fights out of the corner (the fans approve).

The comeback doesn’t last long though as DiBiase hits a clothesline, setting up a High/Low to put Orton down again. Rhodes snaps off an Alabama Slam for two and the save from DiBiase means it’s time for the young hooligans to fight. Orton fights up and sends DiBiase to the floor, followed by a snap powerslam back inside. There’s the backbreaker to Rhodes but DiBiase pulls Orton outside. Rhodes’ dive only hits DiBiase so Orton hits the double hanging DDT. With DiBiase down on the floor, Orton Punts Rhodes and then RKO’s an invading DiBiase for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. There wasn’t much in the way of drama here once DiBiase and Rhodes got in their offense. Orton looked like he was toying with them at the end, which was part of the reason why he was turning into a popular star all over again. This was about Orton smashing through his former lackeys and showing them who the real star was, which he did in quite the destruction by the end.

Vickie Guerrero and company are ready for their ten woman tag. Jillian Hall comes in for a song and whole thing turns into a Slim Jim commercial, with Santino Marella having a bite to change Jillian. First she’s Mae Young, then Gene Okerlund (yes in the same dress) and finally Melina. Wacky….I guess you could call it fun? This isn’t on the Network due to the music.

Money In The Bank

Christian, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shelton Benjamin

This is the last Wrestlemania MITB match before it would go on to get its own show this same year. It’s the usual melee to start with almost everyone going outside. The first ladder is sent inside about thirty seconds in but a bunch of people stop to go after McIntyre rather than climbing. Almost everyone tries to go up but gets stopped, with Kane chokeslamming Bourne over the top for a crash onto more people.

Swagger and Hardy get trapped behind a ladder in the corner and Christian monkey flips Kingston into the ladder onto them. Ziggler breaks it up and makes the climb but MVP pulls him right back down. Kingston hammers on Kane in the corner, earning himself a powerbomb onto a ladder. Benjamin goes up this time so it’s Swagger spearing him with another ladder to break it up.

Swagger gets caught under a ladder so Hardy and Christian hit him with a ladder each. One of the ladders is bridged into another, with Bourne kicking Christian off the bridged version. Air Bourne hits Christian and Bourne goes up, only to be cut off by Hardy. Swagger cuts Hardy off though and shoves him onto the bridged ladder for the huge crash. Shelton and MVP go up but come crashing down, leaving everyone on the floor for a bit.

Kane goes up but has to cut off Ziggler, including a chokeslam onto the ladder. With Kane distracted, Kofi comes back in to kick him in the head but the only ladder available is broken. Kofi gets crazy creative by using the pieces like stilts and jumping up the rungs, only to have McIntyre make the save.

McIntyre goes up but Hardy shoves the ladder over for the big crotching on top. It’s Matt going up this time until Christian is there as well but they both have to knock Kane down. That’s not enough for Christian, who hits the reverse DDT off the ladder to plant Matt again. Christian goes up again, only to have Swagger make the save and pull the case down for the win at 13:29.

Rating: B-. It was a wild match as usual but there is only so much you can do with ten people in a match trying to get in as much time as possible. The stilts spot was very unique and stood out more than anything else, though the rest was little more than the usual big spots and crashes. Swagger winning is a surprise, but WWE was trying something new and that’s often a good idea.

We look back at last night’s Hall Of Fame ceremony.

The Class of 2010 is introduced:

Stu Hart (represented by eight relatives)
Wendi Richter (seems very happy to be there)
Mad Dog Vachon (sadly in a wheelchair)
Antonio Inoki (not the strongest reaction)
Bob Uecker (nice reception)
Gorgeous George (represented by his former wife)
Ted DiBiase (by far the strongest reaction)

Sweet goodness that Hall of Fame theme is always awesome.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. After debuting on Raw and winning the WWE Title within a few weeks, Sheamus was knocked out of the Elimination Chamber by HHH, costing him the title. Sheamus then went on to talk about how much he loved watching HHH while growing up. Then Sheamus laid him out, which HHH liked because it’s what he did when he went after the Ultimate Warrior in 1996 (and yes they explained how badly it went). That plus a need for revenge makes for a Wrestlemania match.

HHH vs. Sheamus

HHH’s entrance goes on for a good while, as you might have expected. Sheamus drives him into the corner to start but HHH hits him in the face. It’s way too early for the Pedigree though as Sheamus bails out to the floor. Back in and a suplex drops Sheamus again, setting up the knee drop for one.

HHH goes old school (shocking I know) as we hit the Figure Four, with Sheamus going straight to the ropes. The fight goes outside with HHH being whipped into the steps, followed by the (yet to be named) Irish Curse back inside. An ax handle to the head cuts HHH off again and Sheamus grabs the armbar.

We’ll make that a chinlock but HHH suplexes his way to freedom, sending Striker into a FAR too long….whatever you call what he does. HHH grabs a DDT and they’re both down, followed by the expected slugout. There’s the running knee into the facebuster for two and a neckbreaker drops Sheamus for the same.

The yet to be named Brogue Kick misses so HHH tries the Pedigree, only to be reversed into the Brogue Kick for two. The fans are rather behind HHH, who fights out of the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) and gets two more off a spinebuster. Sheamus rolls out to the apron and manages another Brogue Kick…but takes too long and gets Pedigreed out of nowhere for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This is the type of match that will work almost every single time as you had two big strong guys beating the fire out of each other until the ending. That’s the kind of brawl that both of them know how to do (though Sheamus would get WAY better later on) and it worked here. That being said, Sheamus is the up and comer and loses to HHH, which seems to be a bit counterproductive, but this would hardly be the first time that happened.

We recap CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio. After Mysterio cost Punk a spot in Money In The Bank, Punk scared the heck out of Mysterio’s daughter Aliyah. They then traded various attacks before Punk creepily sang Happy Birthday to Aliyah, which was too far. Now it’s time for their fight, with Mysterio having to join the Straight Edge Society if he loses.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has the Straight Edge Society (Luke Gallows and Serena) with him and talks about how these 70,000 people here are going to drink or try pills to make their problems go away. He can be their savior and lead them to a better place because he chooses to be drug free and better than everyone here. Mysterio is one of the Na’vi from Avatar, which isn’t quite the same as the superhero gear he tends to use.

Gallows offers an early distraction and Punk gets to stomp away in the corner before tying Mysterio in the Tree of Woe. A missed charge results in a crotching against the post though and they head to the floor…where Punk drops him face first onto the steps. Back in and Punk hammers away for two and we’re already in the chinlock. Mysterio fights out like he’s a top star who was in a chinlock and hits the springboard seated senton.

Punk snaps off a powerslam for two before hitting one heck of a kick to the head for the same. Four more near falls have Punk rather frustrated until Mysterio is up with a springboard moonsault DDT for two of his own. Mysterio’s frog splash misses to give Punk two more, meaning it’s time for even more frustration. Back up and Mysterio loads him up for the 619 but has to take out the Society. Not that it matters as the 619 into the springboard splash finishes Punk at 6:30.

Rating: C+. Another match that was good but they didn’t have the time to do very much. It had the stakes and they work well together, but there is only so much they can do when they have less than seven minutes. It makes perfect sense to have the loudmouth holier than thou heel get what’s coming to him and who better to do that than one of the resident superheroes?

We recap Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon. Hart returned after thirteen years of bitterness after the Montreal Screwjob and of course Vince McMahon couldn’t let it to. Hart wanted to fight Vince at Wrestlemania but got turned down, only to have his leg broken in a car wreck in the parking lot. Then Vince agreed to fight him….and then Hart revealed he was gold bricking, because that’s just what Hart does.

Vince McMahon vs. Bret Hart

No Holds Barred. Hold on though as Vince grabs a mic and says he’s hired a bunch of lumberjacks, in the form of various members of the Hart Family. As a bonus, Bret’s brother Bruce can be guest referee! Bret isn’t overly shocked and says what’s done is done. If there is one thing about the Harts though, it’s that they got paid up front and the money is already in the bank.

If there is one thing he’s learned from the Montreal Screwjob, it’s there’s nothing better than a good double cross. The Harts, including Bret, are united, and tonight is the night that Bret screws Vince. The bell rings and Bret punches him down and chokes in the corner, with Vince bailing to the floor. That means the Harts can make it even worse, including a slap from Natalya (Striker: “Best luck in your future endeavors Natalya.”).

The Hart Dynasty hits a top rope Hart Attack to the floor and it’s time to throw Vince back inside. Bret works on the leg, which sends Vince outside again. This time he comes back in with tire iron but Bret knocks it away again and takes it away. Bret hammers away with the tire iron…and then does it some more…and more, to the point where unless Bret has the strength of a two year old, Vince should be in a coma.

The Sharpshooter is teased but Bret lets it go so he can use the tire iron again. Some low blows have Vince down again and let’s get a chair in there too. Bret sits down and then hits some hard chair shots to Vince’s back. The chair is bent up so Bret finally (and I do mean finally) grabs the Sharpshooter for the win at 11:08.

Rating: C. Ok so I’ve called this an A+ before because I love what they did with Vince being absolutely destroyed and not getting in a single bit of offense. This was never supposed to be anything but a massacre until the Sharpshooter…but my goodness how long did they go with the tire iron/chair shots? The thing here is that this is really only a match in name only so I’m not going to call it bad, but Bret couldn’t have mixed it up with some different stuff other than hitting him over and over with the same stuff?

A big Hart celebration ensues.

Wrestlemania XXVII is coming to Atlanta, Georgia.

Official attendance: 72,219.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Edge for the Smackdown World Title. They were partners last year but Edge tore his Achilles. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble (at #29 in a great surprise) and won, setting up his title shot here. For some reason the build for this match involved Edge saying “spear” over and over until it lost all meaning.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. They start slowly with Jericho grabbing a headlock (Jericho: “Ask him!”) but Edge is right back with some running shoulders. Jericho is back with some stompings in the corner before sending Edge outside. That’s good for a long count before Edge comes back in and gets chinlocked. Jericho slowly stomps and slaps away, which takes long enough that Edge manages to send him shoulder first into the post.

A running shoulder sends Jericho into the announcers’ table and there’s a clothesline off the apron. They head back inside and hopefully pick up the energy a bit here. Back in and Edge gets two off a super gordbuster, followed by a middle rope sunset flip for the same. Jericho goes simple by kicking him in the head but the Codebreaker is blocked. The spear is countered into a quick Walls but Edge slips out.

The Lionsault misses and Edge is right back up with the Edge O Matic for two. Jericho’s enziguri gets two more but so does the Impaler as things slow back down a bit. Jericho mixes things up a bit with a middle rope forearm to the back of the head (Edge was nice enough to look over his shoulder before Jericho jumped), only to have his own spear cut off by a big boot.

The real spear is countered into a Codebreaker for a rather delayed two. Jericho starts going after the ankle before switching to the Walls. We’ll make that a half Walls to stay on the bad ankle but the rope is grabbed. Edge’s rollup for two is also grabbed and they crash out to the floor for a breather. The frustrated Jericho grabs the belt and the referee gets distracted, allowing Jericho’s belt shot to get two. The Codebreaker to a limping Edge retains the title at 15:47.

Rating: B. This was good but it never hit that next level and it made things kind of disappointing. Edge only teased the spear once and never got a big near fall. I was expecting something a lot more epic than we got here and that just didn’t happen. There were some shenanigans due to the belt shot but this needed to be more intense and violent given what Edge was saying coming in.

Post match Jericho goes after Edge again but Edge hits a spear off the announcers’ table and through the barricade as the feud must continue.

We look at the pre-show battle royal.

Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse/Vickie Guerrero vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres/Gail Kim/Kelly Kelly/Mickie James

Get the women on the show special. Vickie bumps Gail to start and turns around to pose, only to run into Phoenix. The non-Vickie team takes turns beating on Vickie in the corner, who asks if Kelly knows who she is. That earns Vickie a kick to the ribs with McCool making the save. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of finishers, leaving Vickie crying in the corner as Beth comes up behind her. McCool makes another save and the Hog Splash (Cole’s name) finishes Kelly at 3:29.

Rating: D. Oh what else were you expecting here? A bunch of the people barely did anything, there were a bunch of Vickie fat jokes, Lawler drooled over most of them and Striker continues to try to make everything sound like the most important moment ever because it gets people paying attention to him. Terrible match and little more than a way for Vickie to keep her heat.

We recap John Cena challenging Batista for the Raw World Title. Cena got the title back in the Elimination Chamber but Vince McMahon allowed Batista an immediate title shot. Now it’s time for the fair rematch, with Batista talking about being tired of Cena being the star when they got big at the same time. You can pretty much ignore all of those details though and just go with “It’s John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.”

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and Cena’s big entrance is from the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. We get the Big Match Intros before they fight over a lockup. Batista grabs a headlock before running Cena over, only to have Cena come back with a headlock of his own. That’s broken up and Batista sends him hard into the corner for the running clothesline to the back of the head.

Some cranking on the neck has Cena down but he manages a release suplex (that didn’t look great) and the bulldog connects for two. It’s way too early for the AA though as Batista reverses into a DDT for two of his own. A chinlock with a bodyscissors keeps Cena down for a bit, only to have him power up and start slugging away. Batista sticks with what has been working by grabbing a neckbreaker for two more.

The front chancery keeps Cena in trouble until he powers up again. The STF goes on out of nowhere but Batista grabs the rope like a bad villain should. Batista is fine enough to hit a spear for two before loading Cena up top. The superplex attempt is blocked and Cena hits a super Five Knuckle Shuffle of all things.

Batista gets back up and hits his namesake Bomb for two, giving us a great shocked face. Back up Cena counters another Batista Bomb into the AA (toss variation) for two, leaving them both down. Cena goes up but dives into a spinebuster (how Batista injured Cena’s neck a few years ago), only to have the Batista Bomb reversed into the STF (with Cena giving him a LONG talk) for the tap at 13:29.

Rating: B. It’s good and they were getting to the big stuff but I was expecting longer than just shy of fourteen minutes. Cena getting the title back is the right way to go for him though as he can put someone else over rather soon. Batista was not quite what he used to be but these two instantly make for an epic feel. Not a classic match, though they didn’t do anything wrong with the setup and finish going rather well.

Cena poses with a guy in a WE HATE CENA shirt for a funny moment.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker. Shawn lost to him the previous year before, leaving Shawn obsessed with having to get the win. It is so big that Shawn is willing to put his career on the line against the Streak, saying he doesn’t have a career if he can’t beat the Undertaker. Not that it matters as this feels absolutely huge and you know it’s going to go well.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ. The entrances are absolutely epic and you know that you’re about to see something special. They also take their sweet time getting to the ring and it builds up even more, with Shawn staring at Undertaker the entire way to the ring. Undertaker charges at him to start but Shawn is right there with the chops. Shawn gets flipped into the corner, setting up Snake Eyes into the big boot.

Old School connects but Undertaker comes up limping a bit. The chokeslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, with Shawn wisely kicking away at the leg. The Tombstone is broken up as well so Shawn starts in on the shoulder, which is a bit of an odd choice given UNDERTAKER IS LIMPING.

Undertaker slips out but has to block a quick superkick attempt as things reset a bit. The logic kicks in as Shawn starts going after the knee in the corner but Undertaker clotheslines him to the floor. The Taker Dive is loaded up but Shawn comes back in to take out the knee in a rather smart move. It’s too early for the Figure Four and they head outside, where Shawn is rammed back first into the post. The apron legdrop connects but Shawn goes after the leg again to take over.

Now the Figure Four goes on until Undertaker sits up. Shawn: “No.” And Undertaker goes back down. Well that was polite of him. Undertaker turns it over so Shawn wisely lets go and they take a breather. Back up and they strike it out until Undertaker grabs a quick chokeslam for two. The Tombstone is escaped again though and Shawn grabs the ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker finally uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom so Shawn sends him outside. A springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air so Undertaker hit the Tombstone on the floor to knock Shawn silly. Medics come out to check on Shawn but Undertaker isn’t having that and throws him back inside for two, meaning frustration is setting in. This might have more of an impact if MATT STRIKER WOULD SHUT UP for once, but instead he needs to keep shouting what he thinks sound like highlight reel worthy lines.

The Last Ride is loaded up but Undertaker’s knee gives out and they crash down, with Shawn getting two off a faceplant. Shawn’s top rope elbow only hits raised knees, which have Undertaker in even more pain. Hell’s Gate goes on but Shawn flips over into a rollup for two. Shawn hits a quick Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere for two but another attempt is countered into a heck of a Last Ride for two more.

They go outside and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. That takes too long though and it’s a superkick to knock Undertaker onto the table instead. In something that couldn’t possibly go wrong, Shawn goes up and moonsaults down onto Undertaker, mostly hitting his feet/lower legs, which does tie into everything so far. Shawn realizes he has a chance and throws Undertaker inside and hits a clean Sweet Chin Music (that has to be the fourth or fifth) for two, with Cole telegraphing the kickout by screaming that Streak was over.

Another superkick is countered into a chokeslam but Undertaker can barely move, let alone cover. Instead it’s a Tombstone (with tongue) for two and we get another stunned face. Shawn can’t get up so Undertaker loads up the throat slit….but stops. Undertaker tells him to stay down as Shawn pulls himself up and then slaps Undertaker in the face, admitting that he can’t do it and basically telling Undertaker to finish him off. The jumping Tombstone does just that at 24:00.

Rating: A+. What do you want me to say here? This is an absolute masterpiece and one of the best matches either of them have ever had if not their best ever. The leg stuff played a role throughout until Shawn gave it everything he had but just couldn’t do it in the end. It told an amazing story with some great action, including multiple near falls where you could buy it being over. It’s better than I remember it being and one of the best main events in Wrestlemania history.

Undertaker needs the ropes to get to his feet and Shawn finally gets up. Undertaker says something to him we can’t see and they hug before Undertaker leaves him alone in the ring. Shawn gets to soak in the THANK YOU SHAWN chants before doing the long walk up the ramp. Shawn: “I’m gonna drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” He looks back again and walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a weird show as there isn’t much that is Wrestlemania worthy. Edge vs. Jericho is just good, Money in the Bank is its usual ok self, HHH vs. Sheamus is a slightly above average power brawl and Batista vs. Cena wasn’t even fifteen minutes long. Those are the high points though, as the rest of the show is pretty much mediocre/forgettable to bad. That doesn’t make for a great Wrestlemania, but this show is usually pretty well remembered.

That’s because of the main event and my goodness does it deserve the praise it receives. I’ve seen it a few times now and it pulled me in again with how epic of a showdown they were having here. It felt like a Wrestlemania main event match and you do not get those very often. That match alone makes this Wrestlemania worth seeing, though I would definitely recommend fast forwarding a good bit of the midcard, as it was quite the miss in multiple places.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: D+
2024 Redo: C

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: C

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B-
2024 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: B+
2024 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: A-
2024 Redo: B-

That’s quite a drop for the overall rating but some of the lower matches just don’t hold up as well.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXIV
Date: March 30, 2008
Location: Citrus Bowl, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 74,365
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

This show has had a pretty strong build as the card has been all but set for a few weeks now. The bigger matches include Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Edge defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker, plus the Raw World Title triple threat match as Randy Orton defends against John Cena and HHH. Throw in Shawn Michaels trying to end Ric Flair’s career and that’s a heck of a card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Elijah Burke, The Miz, Chuck Palumbo, Snitsky, Deuce, Tommy Dreamer, Shannon Moore, Jamie Noble, Kofi Kingston, Festus, Cody Rhodes, Lance Cade, Hardcore Holly, Jesse, Stevie Richards, Trevor Murdoch, The Brian Kendrick, The Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Domino, Mark Henry, Val Venis, Kane, Jim Duggan

The winner gets an ECW Title match later in the show. The bell rings so Festus snaps, allowing him to toss out Deuce and Domino rather quickly. Khali tosses Duggan and Burke gets rid of Richards, only to get eliminated by Kane. Miz, Yang, Moore and Jesse go out in a hurry, with Venis going out somewhere in there.

Murdoch, Festus, Kendrick and Cage go as well as the ring clears out VERY fast. Henry throws Kingston on top of the pile, followed by Noble (who tries to walk on the eliminated bodies but gets knocked down), Rhodes and Palumbo. A bunch of people get rid of Khali, Dreamer and Holly, leaving us with Henry, Kane and Snitsky. Kane gets rid of Snitsky, slips away from Henry and kicks him out for the win/title shot.

Rating: D. This is one of those “let’s get everyone on the DVD” matches and they didn’t bother wasting time with anything else. Kane winning is a fine way to go as he is pretty easily the biggest name in the match. There is almost no reason to not put the title on him later in the night and at least they didn’t waste time announcing the title match in advance, as Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane is hardly some huge showdown.

John Legend sings the America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how important it is to be here, as well how much has changed in a year. It’s not do much a sequel to last year, as much as it is the grand culmination of a rather eventful year. Cool video, as WWE nails these most of the time.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

Belfast Brawl (street fight) and kind of a weird choice for an opener. JBL gets the limo entrance and we look at a quick recap of JBL attacking Hornswoggle (Finlay’s son) as Vince McMahon’s mercenary. As you might expect, Hornswoggle is back as well. They start the fight on the floor with JBL getting the better of things before the bell. Finlay reverses a whip into the steps and they’re back inside for the bell.

That means it’s time to go outside for some weapons, with JBL grabbing a trashcan for a heck of a shot to Finlay’s head. The steps are brought in but JBL gets backdropped off of them for a crash. JBL hammers him back down and grabs the shillelagh but Hornswoggle gets in a kendo stick shot for the save. Finlay shillelaghs JBL down and the fans are rather pleased, with Finlay pulling out a table to make them even happier.

With the table up in the corner, a heck of a clothesline drops JBL again but he goes outside and slaps Hornswoggle. Finlay goes nuts and unloads on JBL, who manages to grab a trashcan lid. The suicide dive (oh dear) is lidded out of the air and JBL even kicks Hornswoggle down. Back in and a trashcan shot to the head puts JBL down for a change, setting up the spear through the table. Finlay grabs the steps but JBL knocks out his knee, sending Finlay face first into them. The Clothesline From JBL finishes Finlay off.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t a classic but they beat each other up rather well and started the show off pretty well. It’s a bit weird to see JBL win as the villain comes out on top, but at the same time he’s a much bigger star than Finlay. Even from fighting underneath, Finlay beating JBL would have been a big upset. It might have been the better result though, but at least it was a solid opener.

Kim Kardashian is the guest host and talks about the Money In The Bank ladder match. Mr. Kennedy interrupts to say he’ll win again this year to become the first ever back to back winner. Kardashian laughs at him repeating his name.

John Morrison vs. Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Money In The Bank. Everyone but MVP bails to the floor to go for a ladder to start, leaving MVP to steal one of the ladder that slides in. Some shots to the face put various other people down but here is Jericho with the big ladder. That means a ladder off (?) with MVP being knocked outside, leaving Morrison to pick up a ladder and moonsault down with it onto the pile (there’s a highlight reel moment).

Back in and Jericho cuts off Kennedy’s climb but catapults him into the ladder in a bit of a mistake. Kennedy can’t get the briefcase so Morrison jumps onto the ladder for the slugout. Benjamin sets up his own ladder and joins the two of them, setting up a sunset bomb into a Tower Of Doom (geez) off the ladders. Carlito breaks up Benjamin’s climb and hits him with the GTS. MVP comes in to knock some people down but misses a running boot in the corner.

It’s Carlito getting pulled down this time so Benjamin Dragon Whips him down. Benjamin goes up until Carlito and Kennedy shove his ladder over…sending him through a bridged ladder at ringside. Kennedy, Carlito and Jericho go up but MVP shoves the ladder over, only to be taken out by Morrison as the carnage continues. Jericho gets the Walls on Morrison on top of the ladder (geez that looks painful/scary) until he has to stop Kennedy.

Hold on though as Carlito and Punk springboard onto the ladders, setting up the big crashes, including Carlito’s super Backstabber to Jericho. That leaves MVP all alone so he goes up but Matt Hardy (in gear) runs in to make the save and reignite their feud. A super Twist of Fate brings MVP off the ladder and Matt runs off through the crowd, leaving Jericho to wedge two ladders together, making kind of a big V (Daddy not included).

Morrison goes up and gets knocked down just as fast, including a crotching on top. Jericho’s climb is cut off by an apple to the face but Kennedy shoves Carlito into a ladder in the corner. Punk makes the save but gets Codebreakered into a ladder to leave everyone down. That lets Jericho go up until Punk starts the slugout. Punk gets smart by tying Jericho’s leg in the ladder and gets the briefcase for the win.

Rating: B. Yeah these matches can be interchangeable but dang they are a lot of fun. This was another spotfest and Punk winning the briefcase is about as big of an endorsement as he could have gotten here. I’d still like to see one or two fewer people in there but Benjamin getting taken out softened things a bit. Heck of a fun match and that’s all it needed to be.

We see the video from last night’s Hall Of Fame induction ceremony.

Here is the Class Of 2008 (dang that music is still great):

Brisco Brothers (how Jack wasn’t in already is beyond me)
Gordon Solie (you can’t forget that voice)
Rocky Johnson (complete with a shuffle)
Peter Maivia (I hear he’s a family man)
Eddie Graham (had to be inducted in Florida)
Mae Young (again, how was she not in before)
Ric Flair (who thankfully isn’t here to tell us about how great he is)

Snoop Dogg is having a great time here so far and he has found someone he sees eye to eye with, from movies to food to cars to everything. That would be Festus but Santino Marella comes in to threaten Snoop….who whips out a bell to send Festus after Santino. Todd Grisham asks where the bell came from so here is Mick Foley, complete with Mr….would it be Snoopo?

Batista vs. Umaga

Smackdown vs. Raw so Theodore Long and William Regal are here. Batista powers him into the corner to start and a shoulder sends Umaga outside for a breather. Back in and a spinwheel kick drops Batista for a change, followed by a splash to the back for two. The nerve hold goes on, which seems a bit early for this one. With that broken up, a powerslam from Umaga sets up…another nerve hold. The Samoan drop gives Umaga two but the Samoan Spike is blocked. Umaga misses a charge into the post, gets spinebustered, and the Batista Bomb (with Batista falling backwards) finishes him off.

Rating: D. Oh this was bad, as it was Batista laying around a lot and then doing his two big finishers. They had built this up as a big match and Batista barely did anything for most of the match. While Umaga had fallen a long way, he was able to do more than this. Normally I would complain about their lack of time, but I don’t want to imagine how much worse this would have been if it had gone longer. Pretty awful match.

We look at the tale of the tape for Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

We look at Kane becoming the new #1 contender to the ECW World Title on the pre-show.

ECW World Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane

Chavo is defending and loses the title to a chokeslam in a record eleven seconds. That’s how it should have gone as there was no reason to believe Chavo would be a threat to Kane.

Here’s the Carlito/Maria ad for the show you’re already watching. Weird.

Raven Symmone is very loud and introduces a bunch of Make-A-Wish kids. That’s always cool. The kids, not Symmone.

We recap Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels. Flair is still on his winning streak, as he has to retire whenever he loses his next match, so now he wants to face one of the best ever in Shawn, or he doesn’t want to be here anymore. Shawn thinks he has to put Flair down, but Flair isn’t about to go down without a fight. This include an AMAZING tribute video to Flair, set to Leave The Memories Alone. I’m not a Flair fan but dang this worked well.

Flair says his game plan is to be the man. WOO!

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Flair retires if he loses. Shawn takes him down to start and teases a strut but Flair is back up with a hammerlock. That’s reversed into one from Shawn and they get up for a standoff, complete with WOO. Flair takes him into the corner and brings up the Old Yeller line, earning a shot to the face from Shawn (busting a lip in the process).

A quick slugout goes to Shawn so he goes up top, only to get slammed off. Flair goes up and hits the high crossbody for two in a Starrcade 83 callback. Back up and Shawn sends him outside again, only to have an Asai moonsault hit the edge of the announcers’ table (as in not Flair) to do some serious damage to his ribs. The count is beaten so Flair goes right after the ribs, including a suplex for two.

Shawn knocks him outside again though and hits the moonsault off the top for another knockdown. Back in and they chop it out again until Michaels hits the flying forearm into the nipup. The top rope elbow hits Flair but Shawn can’t bring himself to fire the superkick. You don’t do that to Flair, who grabs the Figure Four, which is turned over without much trouble. Shawn sunset flips him for two more but Flair is right back to the leg, as is his bread and butter.

There’s the Figure Four again and this time it stays on a lot longer. The rope is grabbed to get Shawn out of trouble and he nails Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere. A very delayed cover gets two so Shawn loads it up again, only to have Flair fall down. Shawn’s attempt at picking him up earns himself the required low blow for two but Flair can’t follow up either.

Instead, Shawn pulls him into that inverted Figure Four of his, sending Flair to the rope for a change. They chop it out from their knees until Shawn hits another Sweet Chin Music. Shawn won’t cover so he goes to the corner, with Flair getting back up. Flair says bring it, so Shawn says “I’m Sorry, I Love You” and superkicks him for the pin.

Rating: B. This is a weird one to rate as it is a farewell for Flair, but not exactly a classic. At the end of the day, Flair has been able to wrestle a completely acceptable match for a long time now but there is a big gap between that and hanging in there on this level. It didn’t exactly feel like a classic and the drama was limited, but what we got was certainly good. The problem is that when you think of Flair vs. Michaels on the stage of Wrestlemania, you expect a bit more than “good”. That being said, Flair gets to out with a solid match on the grand stage against a legend. What more could you reasonably ask for?

Shawn immediately leaves so Flair can have the big moment. Flair kisses and hugs his family and makes the long walk up the aisle before blowing one last kiss to the crowd. Yeah it’s an emotional moment, as like him or not, Flair is still a legend and one of the last links to the glory days of the 70s/80s.

Edge talks about being at Wrestlemania VI and seeing Hulk Hogan lose in the main event. It was ok though, because it has come full circle and now he is here again. See, everyone can count on the Undertaker at Wrestlemania but tonight, he takes everything away from them, just like Hogan losing took it away from him. That makes sense.

Fireworks go off.

Maria/Ashley vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina

This is the Playboy Bunnymania match, meaning a lumberjill match with Snoop Dogg as the Master of Ceremonies. Naturally Snoop comes to the ring in what looks like a Mercedes golf cart, with most of the women following him. Santino Marella is here with the villains. Ashley drives Beth into the corner to start so Maria can come in. Melina gets sent to the floor for a quick beating from the lumberjills, setting up Maria’s Bronco Buster back inside.

Ashley comes back in and gets caught in the wrong corner. A trip to the floor goes badly for Ashley as well and Beth grabs the bearhug. With that broken up, Beth electric chairs Melina into a moonsault onto Ashley (not bad) for a near fall….and the lights go out. As in an actual lights issue, not an Undertaker cameo.

We get a spotlight as Maria (now legal) hits a crossbody for two on Beth. The Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog for two and Beth’s spear hits Melina by mistake. Ashley dives off the apron onto a bunch of lumberjills, leaving Maria to hit a top rope bulldog for two on Beth, with Santino making the save. Jerry Lawler gets up and decks Santino but Beth hits the fisherman’s buster to pin Maria.

Rating: D. Well ok then. This is one of those matches that was never going to be very good in the first place, but then it got a bit more time than I was expecting (even at five minutes) and the villains win. The match was supposed to be little more than goofy fun and you can’t have Maria get in a rollup for the pin? Just a rather weird choice and I’m not sure why they went this way.

Post match Snoop Dogg drops Santino and kisses Maria.

We recap the Raw World Title match, with Randy Orton defending against John Cena and HHH. Cena and HHH are both coming back from major injuries, with Orton having risen to the top during their absences. Now both of them are back to win the title at Wrestlemania, but Orton doesn’t quite see it that way.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena vs. HHH

Orton is defending and Cena’s big entrance this year is a marching band playing him to the ring (that’s rather cool). The bell rings and Orton hits HHH with the bell before brawling with Cena. HHH gets back up and takes Orton outside to beat him over the announcers’ table, followed by the sleeper back inside. Cena picks both of them up but HHH slips out and kicks him low. Orton is back up as well and knocks HHH down to stomp away at both of them.

Cena catches Orton up top but a HHH distraction lets Orton reverse into a sunset flip for two. Another hard shot puts HHH down and Orton hits a double hanging DDT. The RKO to Cena is countered with a shove, leaving Orton to land on HHH. The Throwback hits Orton and the top rope Fameasser takes him down again. Back up and HHH goes after Orton’s knee and slowly stomps away. Cena’s distraction lets the RKO drop HHH but Cena pulls Orton into the STFU.

Orton is about to tap so HHH grabs his hand and pulls it to the rope in a smart move. A whip into the steps takes Cena down and HHH grabs the Indian Deathlock on Orton, because of course he has to do that. Cena sends HHH over the ropes and grabs the STFU on Orton again, only to have HHH make another save. HHH grabs a crossface on Cena but gets broken up, meaning it’s time for the slugout. The FU and Pedigree are both broken up so HHH hits a face/spinebuster. Another shot to the knee takes Orton down and there’s the Pedigree to Cena….but Orton Punts HHH and pins Cena to retain the title.

Rating: B-. It’s an interesting way to go to have Orton retain, but if you want him to have him feel like a bigger main event, giving him the win at Wrestlemania makes as much sense as anything else. Orton can drop the title to one of them alter if he has to but for now, he gets the win that he needs. The match wasn’t exactly great though and felt like almost any other big time triple threat, with one person being out for most of it so the others could fight. Then Orton stole the pin, which is far too common of a finishing sequence in something like this. Not awful, but I’d call it pretty disappointing.

We recap Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr., in a package that is cut from Peacock, likely for music. Mayweather broke Show’s jaw with a punch at No Way Out so Show is trying to take him out. This is billed as the Best Fighter In The World vs. the Largest Athlete In The World and is as McMahon Freak Show style as you can get.

Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Pinfall, submission or knockout only. Mayweather comes out with his entourage and makes money rain from the sky for a festive entrance. The bell rings and Mayweather, in boxing gloves runs away to start before hitting a few shots to the ribs. Hold on though as Mayweather needs water (from a chalice, because of course) so Show beats up part of the entourage.

Back in and Mayweather goes for the right hand to the face but Show pulls it out of the air. The big stomp on the hand misses so Show grabs him by the throat on the corner. A few right hands don’t do much to Show so Mayweather grabs the required sleeper. That’s broken up so Show goes after the hand again and stands on Mayweather, which has the entourage shouting that how THAT IS AGAINST THE RULES!

The big chop in the corner drops Mayweather again and there’s a side slam to crush him. Show gets creative by dropping a leg on the arm and that’s enough for the entourage to pull Mayweather out. That goes as well as you might expect and they go back to the ring, with Mayweather being mostly done.

The entourage tries to come in and gets dropped, with a chair shot having no effect on Show. Mayweather gets the chair and drops Show (after a guy twice his size couldn’t even stagger him), setting up a low blow. Some chair shots to the head stagger Show again so Mayweather grabs brass knuckles from the entourage to knock Show silly for the knockout win.

Rating: C+. This was a total mess and incredibly entertaining throughout. There is something fun about seeing Mayweather get beaten up, even if he won in the end. It made sense to not bother trying to do anything else here than having a goofy match and that is what they pulled off. Good enough stuff here, even if it was mainly Show doing slow motion stuff and Mayweather’s entourage getting beaten up. Still though, they knew what they had here and it worked.

The attendance, as announced by Kim Kardashian: 74,635.

We recap Edge vs. Undertaker for Edge’s Smackdown World Title. The focus is on both of them being undefeated at Wrestlemania, with Edge seemingly being more obsessed with giving Undertaker his first loss rather than retaining the title. Undertaker just wants to hut Edge, as tends to be the case to anyone who has hurt him before. Like Edge, who cost him the World Title and then stole it for himself.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is defending and gets his neck snapped across the top rope to start. Undertaker hammers away back inside and starts cranking on the arm, as is his custom. Old School is broken up and Edge sends him to the apron for a shoulder into the barricade. A running neckbreaker snaps Undertaker’s neck across the top to even things up a bit, meaning Edge gets in some Wrestlemania worthy posing.

Undertaker finally gets back in, where he is caught with a missile dropkick. Edge takes too long to go up again and gets shoved to the floor, setting up the required Taker Dive. Back in and Undertaker’s banged up back means the Last Ride doesn’t work so Edge takes him back outside. There’s a drop onto the barricade, followed by the half crab to keep Undertaker in trouble back inside.

Make that a double leg crank until Undertaker kicks him away for a needed breather. Undertaker wins the slugout and Snake Eyes connects, only to have Edge hit a dropkick to block the big boot (that’s smart). The chokeslam is countered into the Edgecution for two and frustration is setting in. Back up and the chokeslam gives Undertaker two but Old School is countered again (as the theme of Edge knowing everything that is coming continues).

A superplex brings Undertaker back down but for some reason, Edge decides to punch away in the corner. The pose lets Undertaker try the Last Ride, which is countered into a neckbreaker to give Edge two. Another Last Ride attempt connects for two but the Tombstone is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. Undertaker is up again and Old School connects, only to have a big boot hit the referee (you knew that was coming).

Edge goes low and grabs a camera, which knocks Undertaker silly for….well nothing actually as the referee falls to the floor. For reasons of delusions of grandeur, Edge tries his own Tombstone, which is reversed into the real thing, with another referee running down to count the near fall. Cue the Edgeheads to get beaten up, allowing Edge to hit a spear for two. Another spear is pulled into Undertaker’s choke and Edge has to tap away the title.

Rating: A-. That felt like a Wrestlemania main event as you had Edge countering every single time but ultimately not being good enough to beat Undertaker, even with the interference. Edge had his game plan but got a bit too cocky a few times, allowing Undertaker to catch up fast. Undertaker getting his title back and vanquishing Edge in the process is a great way to close the show, and the fact that it came in an excellent match makes it even better.

Undertaker celebrates and pyro rains.

The big highlight video wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a show where there is a lot of good stuff but the bad drags it down, with only the main event really standing out as great. Other than that you have Money In The Bank doing its usual stuff, Flair’s farewell as a special moment, a freak show match with Show vs. Mayweather and a just pretty good Raw World Title match. That really isn’t enough to carry a nearly four hour Wrestlemania, leaving it as a good enough show, but far from a classic or all time show.

 

 

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Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

It is pretty rare when you have a true one match card but that is what we have here, as Batista is defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker inside the Cell. There might be a few other things going on here, but that has been treated as the be all and end all of the show, as it should be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Survivor Series before we move on to this year’s preview.

ECW World Title: Miz vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and for the sake of sanity, I’ll only refer to him as champion. It’s a brawl to start with Punk getting double teamed down into the corner. Morrison catapults Punk into the corner but he comes out with a middle rope crossbody. Punk knocks Miz to the floor but the springboard clothesline is broken up to put Punk down again. Miz breaks up Punk’s springboard with a shot to the floor though and it’s a camel clutch to Punk.

That means Morrison comes in for the save, setting up a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to drop Punk again. A suplex from the apron gets two on Miz but he is right back with a running corner clothesline. Punk is back in with a hurricanrana to send Morrison into Miz for a powerbomb and a near fall. The running knee in the corner sets up the corner bulldog to give Punk two on Miz and a double underhook backbreaker onto the knee gets the same. Morrison is back up to go after Miz, only to be sent outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Miz and retain.

Rating: C+. Miz and Morrison’s rise continues as the two of them have become rather dependable on ECW, and now elsewhere. It makes sense to give them the Tag Team Titles and now we should be seeing even more of them. This was a good way to get the show going as Punk has to work to retain and Miz and Morrison have come far enough that they didn’t seem like cannon fodder.

We look at MVP turning on Matt Hardy, costing the two of them the Tag Team Titles.

MVP says Matt will not be wrestling tonight because he can’t walk. He is tired of being Matt’s latest crutch and he is better than any of his opponents tonight.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson

One fall to a finish rather than elimination rules. Michelle suplexes Victoria to start and then kicks her in the face for two. Torrie comes in and gets swung into the side slam, only to come back with a suplex. It’s off to Jillian vs. Kelly, with the latter grabbing a rollup for two of her own. Phoenix comes in and plants Maria but a missed charge allows the hot tag to James to clean house. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits the Long Kiss Goodnight to finish Melina.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? It was a bunch of the good women vs. the bad women and there is only so much you’re going to get from a match like that. They didn’t have time to do anything and given some of the skill levels of the women involved, that is not a bad idea. The positive sign is that the women are making progress, but a lot of them still aren’t ready to be in a match like this. Leave this thing to Raw.

William Regal and Coach are ready to see Hornswoggle get crushed by Great Khali.

Randy Orton is ready to disappoint everyone and break the Heart Break Kid.

Shawn Michaels wants revenge. And the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Holly and Rhodes are challenging. Rhodes and Cade start things off with Cade grabbing a hiptoss for some early celebrating. A sunset flip gives Cody one and the headlock goes on. That just earns Cody a backbreaker to cut him off so it’s off to Murdoch for a change. Cody takes him into the corner and it’s Holly coming in to forearm away. The hanging kick to the low abdomen has Cade in trouble and the champs need a breather on the floor.

Back in and it’s an atomic drop into a running boot to Holly’s face as Murdoch takes over again. Cade atomic drops Murdoch into a legdrop on Cody for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. Holly suplexes his way out of trouble but Cade is right there with a clothesline. The second atomic drop/legdrop misses though and it’s Cody coming in to very little reaction to clean house. Everything breaks down and Murdoch Code Reds Cody to retain.

Rating: C-. This would have been fine on any given Raw, meaning it was a pretty disappointing pay per view match. Cade and Murdoch are fine as champions and Rhodes and Holly are getting there as a veteran/rookie team, but they aren’t ready for this kind of a match on pay per view. It was far from bad, but this match was sent out there to die and I think WWE knew that was going to happen.

Team HHH, which is down a man due to Matt Hardy’s knee injury, is ready for Team Umaga. Rey Mysterio talks about being an underdog, but that has never been Kane’s thing. Kane brings up the Katie Vick incident (and goes into details). Then Jeff Hardy reminds HHH of the time he put Jeff in the hospital. HHH: “Uh, my bad.” HHH says this is the night when they can come together and do something terrible, so let’s go do it.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

We get a preview of Batista vs. Undertaker with a look at their Cell match in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Why Batista is wearing a Tag Team Title to the ring isn’t clear.

Vince McMahon sits down with Hornswoggle to explain why he made the match with Great Khali for tonight. Some people think that it is because Vince hates him, but it is really because he wants Hornswoggle to rise up like the McMahons do. Vince has been an underdog against Time Warner and the US government and he won. Now go win against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Shane McMahon comes out to introduce Vince McMahon and then Hornswoggle for some family flavor. We even get an old school explanation of the rules as the fans want Shaquille O’Neal (in the front row) to help Hornswoggle, but Vince grabs the mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want. Hornswoggle kicks the knee and then dropkicks Runjin Singh through the ropes. The green mist sets up some right hands but Khali chases Hornswoggle off. The distraction lets Hornswoggle grab the shillelagh but Vince takes it away. Khali loads up the Vice Grip, only to have Finlay come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say about something like this? The match was a segment instead of anything competitive and that is all it was ever going to be. At the end of the day, the Hornswoggle/Vince story has run out of steam and adding Finlay into the mix isn’t likely to make things that much better. Maybe they can shift things around, but Vince needs to be on to something else.

Post match Finlay destroys Khali with the shillelagh and a low blow, allowing Hornswoggle to escape.

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. Michaels came back in September and went after Orton, who had put him on the shelf. Orton kept getting superkicked but got disqualified last month. Now Michaels wants revenge but can’t use the superkick. If he does, the match is instantly over, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is challenging and we even get a weapons check. Feeling out process with Michaels grabbing a cravate of all things to start. Orton can’t even slam his way out of the cravate but he can drive Shawn into the corner for some right hands. Michaels is right back with a choke on the back before switching to a front facelock as you can feel the anger and hatred here.

Back up and Orton is sent outside, with Shawn hitting an Asai moonsault to take him down. They get back inside with Shawn grabbing a…..wait for it…..Sharpshooter. Orton makes the rope and gets in a poke to the eye, setting up the hanging DDT for two. Shawn fights up and slugs it out, setting up the forearm. More right hands have Orton in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick for two.

Some slams give Michaels a breather and the top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music. That’s a head fake though and they trade some rollups for two each. Michaels grabs a Crossface instead but Orton gets a foot on the rope. The backbreaker cuts Michaels off again but he counters the Punt into an ankle lock of all things. The grapevine goes on in the middle, only to have Orton kick his way to freedom. Michaels’ Figure Four attempt is countered with a kick into the post so he teases the superkick but gets RKOed to retain Orton’s title.

Rating: B. Pretty good here, but the amount of stipulations they had going on made it a little difficult to believe that they were going to change the title here. Shawn not using the superkick at the end looked a bit awkward though and the ending only worked so well. They had a good match otherwise though, which has to be expected when it’s Shawn vs. Orton getting time.

Post match Orton talks trash to Shawn and gets superkicked.

SAVE US!

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker for Batista’s Smackdown World Title. They’ve fought several times this year and Batista finally beat him for the first time last month. Now it’s the big final showdown inside the Cell.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending inside the Cell. They start fast with Batista hitting a hard clothesline but having to elbow his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker punches him into the corner and hits Snake Eyes into the running big boot. The chair is brought in but Batista spears him down. Undertaker’s clothesline gets two this time and they head outside with Undertaker hammering away.

A face rake against the Cell sets up a chair to the throat has Batista in a lot of trouble so Undertaker chairs him in the ribs for two. Old School is countered into a spinebuster (that was cool) for a delayed two and it’s time to slug it out again. Batista’s running powerslam gets two and they head outside with Undertaker getting blasted with a clothesline. Undertaker is fine enough to whip him into the steps and now a chair to the head has Batista busted open.

Old School is broken up again and Batista hits a superplex but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke. Since we’re in the Cell, the rope breaks the hold (erg) and they head outside again. This time Batista hits him in the face with the steps and now Undertaker is busted open too. Back in and a chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is countered into another spinebuster for another near fall.

It’s table time, with Batista tossing him through it for two more. The Batista Bomb onto the steps is countered into a backdrop onto the steps. Undertaker plants him with the chokeslam for two, followed by another onto the steps….and a cameraman breaks it up. That’s because the cameraman is Edge, who cameras Undertaker in the head. A Conchairto on the steps knocks Undertaker silly and Edge puts Batista (who saw nothing) on top to retain.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and it felt like a war, with the Edge interference being a great surprise to give them a back door out of the match. What mattered here is they kept things high impact here, which is exactly what these two do best. Let them go in there and hit all their power stuff until one of them can’t get up, which granted was due to some help in this case. You can all but guarantee the triple threat next month and that is a fresh way to go, so nicely done.

Post match, Edge takes Undertaker down again and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main events carry the show, but there is a really big gap between the top of the card and everything else. Even the third biggest match on the show doesn’t feel that important as the whole show was built around Batista vs. Undertaker. The show was a fun enough watch, but outside of the main event, it doesn’t feel like a lot of this matters in the long run.

 

 

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Survivor Series 2005
Date: November 27, 2005
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s all about Raw vs. Smackdown as the big elimination tag is all that matters around here. That’s in addition to the Raw World Title match, which should be another good but not exactly thrilling showdown. I’m not sure what to expect for most of the show, but that elimination tag is the centerpiece of the show. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence is almost all about Raw vs. Smackdown, as it should be.

Booker T. vs. Chris Benoit

Match #1 in a best of seven series for the vacant US Title. Benoit gets backed into the corner to start and it’s a surprisingly clean break. Booker slams him down but Benoit pops back up for a standoff. Some forearms puts Booker on the floor and we’re still in low first gear. They go to the mat with Benoit easily getting the better of things and cranking on the leg to limited success.

That’s enough for Booker to take another breather on the floor. Back in and Booker elbows him in the face so Benoit hits him with a running forearm. That just earns Benoit a side slam for two and the armbar goes on. Make that an abdominal stretch but Benoit fights out again and hits an elbow. Booker elbows him into the corner and gets two off a neckbreaker.

A reverse chinlock doesn’t last long so Booker goes with the jumping kick to the face instead. Benoit grabs a quick dragon screw legwhip but the Sharpshooter is countered into a small package for two. The rolling German suplexes work a bit better but Sharmell’s distraction delays the Swanton, allowing Booker to roll away. A rollup with feet on the ropes and Sharmell grabbing the leg is enough for Booker to get the pin.

Rating: B. This was better than their Smackdown match as they were able to build things up a bit better. It’s a good way to start off the show, though it’s not like these matches matter all that much until we get to what is more than likely going to be a seventh match. That sounds good in theory, but it wouldn’t surprise me to see the match get a little boring by that point.

Eric Bischoff meets with Vince McMahon in the back and talks about the history of screwjobs at Survivor Series. Tonight, Bischoff Screws Cena. Cue Cena: “So Eric Bischoff screws guys.” Bischoff leaves and Cena shakes Vince’s hand. In a legendary line, Vince: “Keep it up my n****.” Vince struts off as Booker and Sharmell look flabbergasted. I can’t believe this is uncensored on the Network.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending and this is interpromotional after Melina and MNM kidnapped Trish on Raw. Mickie James and Melina are here as well. Trish jumps her to start and sends Melina outside for the big dive onto all three of them. Back in and a hair toss sends Melina down and the headscissors does the same. Melina gets in a knee to the back and a kick to the ribs.

They trade boot chokes in the corner and but Melina goes after Mickie, leaving MNM to try the Snapshot on Trish. That’s broken up by a referee actually paying attention and the two of them are ejected. We hit a modified surfboard, which I’m sure is not just an excuse to put Trish in various positions. The Matrish is broken up with a shot to the ribs for two but the Stratusphere works just fine. Stratusfaction is broken up but Mickie saves Trish from a cheap shot to the back. A top rope bulldog retains the title.

Rating: D+. There was only so much you could do here as there is no secret to the fact that this is setting up Mickie challenging Trish for the title at some point in the future. Melina hadn’t gotten good in the ring yet so for now she’s glorified eye candy who can do a passable match. In other words, she’s a traditional Diva of the era.

We recap HHH vs. Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match. Flair beat him last month in a cage match so now it’s about ending each other in the way WWE ends people.

HHH vs. Ric Flair

Non-title and Last Man Standing. HHH jumps him in the aisle and the beating is on in a hurry with Flair’s robe and belt being ripped off. Flair gets in a kendo stick to the ribs (Flair using a kendo stick is just wrong) and they head into the crowd with HHH managing to backdrop him back to ringside. A suplex has Flair in more trouble inside and the pace slows a bit.

They go outside again and a screwdriver to the head busts Flair open in a hurry. Back in and some kneedrops make the blood flow even more and it’s already back to the floor. HHH takes too long setting up the announcers’ table though and Flair sends him face first into the steps. A spinebuster on the floor cuts Flair off again though as this has been one hope spot after another with HHH dropping him every time. HHH grabs a microphone to yell but Flair grabs him low.

That earns him a trip into the announcers’ table but Flair backdrops him through the other one in the first really big spot of the match. HHH is up at eight so Flair takes him back inside for some chops. Some right hands put Flair down as well so he hits HHH low to even things up. A chair to the head puts HHH down and Flair bites at the head, followed by a crotching against the post.

The chop block takes HHH down again but the Figure Four is broken up. Flair doesn’t seem to mind as he wraps the knee around the post and smashes it with a chair. NOW the Figure Four can go on and Flair even grabs the rope for a bonus. HHH taps so Flair can claim a bit of a moral victory and the hold is let go. A shot to the face knocks Flair into the corner and the steps to the head give HHH five.

There’s the drop toehold to send HHH face first into the steps but he staggers up and hits a Pedigree. Flair pulls himself up so there’s a second Pedigree. He’s up again so they hit the same sequence one more time. Flair gets to his feet a third time so it’s a sledgehammer shot to the….something well hidden by a camera cut but it’s finally enough to finish Flair off.

Rating: B. It’s good but it’s nowhere near as good as the cage match. As usual, the ending didn’t work very well as they were just doing the same stuff over and over again until a big hammer shot put Flair down. Thankfully they didn’t waste a lot of time with the near falls throughout the match, which are always annoying in a match like this. It wasn’t great and it should have been shorter but it worked well enough.

Randy Orton and JBL try to fire up Team Smackdown but Batista comes in and takes care of it for them.

Here are Edge and Lita for a chat. They’re changing things up around here because they are going to have their own talk show with the Cutting Edge. With that out of the way, Edge calls out Detroit Tiger Dmitri Young, who plays for a bad team and is fat you see. Detroit sports jokes abound but Young asks about Edge’s World Title. Edge and Lita are out of here, just like Ford and GM.

We recap John Cena vs. Kurt Angle. Kurt has beaten him a few times but never for the title so now he has Daivari as his personal referee. It’s the final showdown and this should be a good one.

Raw World Title: Kurt Angle vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and Daivari is guest referee. The place goes coconuts for Cena as the star power continues to rise. Angle wastes no time in taking him down by the leg and cranks on the ankle a bit. Some shoulders put Angle on the floor and DANG the fans are into Cena. Daivari won’t let him go after Angle though and things settle down a bit. Back in and Angle stomps him down in the corner until Cena snaps off a release fisherman’s suplex.

That’s not even worthy of a count so Angle grabs the ankle lock. Cena makes the rope so Daivari kicks his hand away. With that not working, Cena kicks him away and slaps Daivari in the face. Daivari is ready for the DQ but Angle gets sent into him for the double knockdown. Angle posts Cena and another referee comes down to count two. Some suplexes give Angle some twos and we hit the waistlock. Another suplex drops Cena again and the fans get even louder.

It’s off to the weird cousin of an STF on Cena but Angle switches to a regular chinlock pretty quickly. Cena suplexes his way to freedom and the comeback is on….so Angle clotheslines the referee on purpose. A low blow drops Cena and the Angle Slam gets two from the third referee. Angle’s top rope superplex gets two more but he misses the moonsault. The FU is broken up and Angle decks the third referee so here’s one from Smackdown. Angle tries to hold him back as Cena DDTs Daivari and then FU’s Angle to retain.

Rating: C+. They had a good match in there somewhere but egads they had too much going on at the same time here. When you have a fourth referee climbing over the three down referees, you’re only going to get so far. Cena needs a fresh opponent now as he’s beaten Angle more than once now so just let him do something else. That being said, who is there right now?

Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long

Palmer Cannon is here with Teddy and there is a referee from both shows. Long posts to start and then ducks a clothesline, meaning it’s time to dance. With that out of the way, it’s more dancing and the required crane pose. Cannon gets drawn onto the apron and Bischoff gets in some choking. A sleeper goes on until Long takes off his own shoe and hits Eric in the head. Eric is ticked….and we’ve got the Boogeyman. Choking into a pumphandle slam drops Bischoff and the one shoed Long gets the pin.

Rating: D-. Teddy’s dancing is the only thing that keeps this from failing because it always makes me smile. This was a complete waste of time but they had to have something in there to stretch the show out a bit. It wasn’t a match of course but what else were you expecting out of something like this?

Both teams get cheered to the ring by their locker rooms.

We recap Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown. Back at Homecoming, Bischoff turned out the lights on a Smackdown six man tag so a bunch of invasions started happening. Therefore, let’s have an elimination tag for brand supremacy.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Shawn Michaels, Kane, Big Show, Carlito, Chris Masters

Smackdown: Batista, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio

Entrances take forever of course and Rey gets some very loud EDDIE chants. Orton takes Shawn into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. Shawn gets in a whip to the other corner to set up some chops as commentary is already bickering. Orton gets in a slam but misses the knee drop so it’s off to Masters. The knee the face works fine on him but it’s quickly off to Lashley, who tosses Masters around.

Carlito gets the tag so Lashley pulls him in and hits a running powerslam for two. It’s back to Shawn, who gets knocked down as well. There’s the Dominator to Carlito but Kane saves Shawn from the same fate. A Kane chokeslam from the apron lets Shawn get rid of Lashley, who wasn’t nearly the factor you would have bet on after the last few weeks. Rey comes in and dropkicks Shawn in the knee as Cole says he’d love to see this dream match. I know he has a short attention span but he can’t remember something from less than two weeks ago?

Kane comes in and gets dropkicked down but is right back up for a big boot. A backbreaker gets two on Rey and we hit the backbreaker. Rey fights out in a hurry though and it’s off to Batista for the shoulders in the corner. A spear into the spinebuster gets rid of Kane but here’s Show for an immediate chokeslam. That’s good for two but Kane is back up for a double chokeslam to get rid of Batista. JBL’s middle rope shoulder is pulled out of the air by Big Show but Orton snaps his throat across the top.

The Clothesline From JBL into the 619 into the RKO into another Clothesline From JBL into the springboard seated senton FINALLY gets rid of Big Show and we’re down to 3-3. Everything breaks down and JBL hits Shawn with a fall away slam on the floor as Masters plants Rey. Carlito comes in for a legdrop and the chinlock goes on. Rey fights up and gets a blind tag from JBL, who blasts Carlito with the Clothesline for the pin.

Masters comes in next and gets hammered down as Shawn is still out on the floor. Rey comes back in and avoids a charge into the post, setting up the 619. Dropping the Dime gets rid of Masters and it’s down to Shawn vs. Orton/Mysterio/JBL. Rey throws Shawn back in and hits the 619 but the West Coast Pop is Sweet Chin Musiced out of the air for the pin. JBL tries the Clothesline but Shawn ducks and superkicks him out for the back to back pins in about fifteen seconds.

That leaves us with Shawn vs. Orton but neither finisher can hit. Orton bails to the floor so Shawn hits a slingshot dive as the fans want Undertaker. Back in and Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup but JBL is still here and brings in a chair. That earns him another superkick but Shawn walks into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was good enough and was absolutely the main event of the show. Even though this was for completely meaningless bragging rights, it worked this time because that was something fresh. It’s the difference between doing it once and doing it every year: this time felt like they had built something up instead of throwing it out there because it was November. It also helps when you have Shawn at his best playing the underdog and Orton being great at this match. This nearly identical formula worked in 2003 and it worked here too.

Post match the Smackdown locker room comes in to celebrate….and we’ve got druids. They bring out a casket and stand it upright as the gong hits. Lightning strikes the casket and it is lit on fire, with Undertaker walking out. Undertaker destroys the roster as the Ortons get to the outside. The big staredown with the throat slit ends the show.

Overall Rating: B+. For a show that was almost entirely about the main event, this was actually a very good show with only the Long vs. Bischoff non-match being bad. There are several good matches throughout and it doesn’t drag at all. The ending was a bit obvious as everyone was waiting on Undertaker, but that’s not always the worst thing. Check this out if you need something to watch as it’s a very impressive show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: June 16, 2008
Location: E-Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s night two of Million Dollar Mania, which is likely going to mean a lot of sitting around while Vince McMahon talks on the phone. Other than that, we’re on the way towards Night Of Champions and things are heating up between John Cena and HHH. We’re also a week away from the Draft and that means things are going to be shaken up soon. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. Cena talks about how much he loves WWE and how there are moments that transcend time. Moments like Hulk Hogan slamming Andre the Giant, Shawn Michaels’ boyhood dream coming true, and the first time Steve Austin beat someone up. We are (less than) two weeks away from another one of those moments, when he defeats HHH at Night Of Champions to become WWE Champion.

Cue HHH to say this isn’t personal but he’s not sure how much he believes that. Last week, Cena cost HHH a match with Jeff Hardy. If that happens again, this is going to get really personal really fast. Cena brings up HHH knocking him off the announcers’ table last week but HHH knew he would fall off on his own anyway. We hear about HHH tapping at Wrestlemania, with HHH pointing out that IT WAS TWO YEARS AGO.

Cena says HHH may be champion, but until he beats Cena, it doesn’t matter. HHH mocks Cena for being a favorite of younger fans and THAT is enough to make Cena want to fight. A referee comes in but here is Vince McMahon to says not so fast, because this is about giving away money. As for the people in the ring, Cena is in a match right now.

John Cena vs. Umaga

Street fight. Cena tries a sunset lip of all things before going for the slam, with Umaga falling down on him instead. Umaga knocks him hard off the apron and we take a break. Back with Cena charging into a Samoan drop on the ramp but the running hip attack only hits post. Cena hits him with the microphone (there had to be better options) but Umaga plants him with the spinning Rock Bottom for two.

Umaga grabs a chair but Cena takes it away and puts him down instead. The Throwback and top rope Fameasser connect, only to have Cena fall down when trying the FU. A whip into the steps keeps Cena down so Umaga brings the steps inside, only to have Cena reverse into the FU for the pin.

Rating: C+. These two had some great chemistry together at one point and it was still there to a certain extent, but Umaga has fallen a very long way since the old days. Cena got a little something out of a win over the monster though and that was the point. I’m sure HHH will have a match of his own later on as it’s a good way to make both he and Cena look like stars.

Vince McMahon calls a fan and makes him bark like a dog, which is good for $125,000.

And now, a bikini contest between Maria, Eve Torres, Jillian Hall, Lena Yada, Layla, Melina and Maryse, with Charlie Haas of all people hosting. They all disrobe (well not Jillian, who would rather sing), get fifteen seconds each, and Maria wins.

Vince, money, $100,000, though the fan from North Carolina says Ric Flair is the most handsome man ever from the state. Vince lets him have the money anyway.

We look back at Chris Jericho injuring Shawn Michaels’ eye.

Jim Duggan comes out (both he and the 2×4 are in tuxedos) to help Vince McMahon give away $50,000 but the call goes to voicemail. Vince mocks the fan for blowing it so another fan wins instead.

Jeff Hardy vs. Carlito

Jeff starts fast by sending him outside for the slingshot dive. Back in and Carlito catches him in the ropes for the hanging swinging suplex. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Hardy’s back but it’s broken up rather quickly. Jeff misses a dropkick to give Carlito two but he’s right back with a jawbreaker to send Carlito flying. The Whisper In The Wind gets two and there’s the sitout gordbuster. The Twist of Fate into the Swanton finishes Carlito off.

Rating: B-. Nice match here, though they didn’t have much time to get very far. The interesting thing here though is that Hardy seems ready to move up to the main event scene. Last week he beat HHH and this week he gets a nice win over Carlito. He’s too big to be in the Intercontinental Title scene, so there isn’t much left for him to go but move up the ladder again. That could be a big deal, and we should be on the way.

Vince, $175,000 this time, but the fan has to sing part of the National Anthem.

Here is Chris Jericho to explain attacking Shawn Michaels last week because everyone has been getting on him about it. We see a clip of the attack and then Jericho blames the fans for changing. It wasn’t his fault that any of this had to happen but the fans are blaming him anyway. That means the fans don’t deserve to be saved anymore and he doesn’t need want them to cheer him anyway. They must want Shawn to come out here right now but it’s not going to happen.

Cue Ric Flair to interrupt and get in Jericho’s face to tell him to shut up. No he can’t wrestle anymore, but they can go to the parking lot and have a fight right now. They start heading to the back but Jericho runs into HHH, who thinks Jericho has been doing enough. Ever since Jericho came back, HHH has been wanting to make Jericho his business and now he wants a fight. Jericho backs down though and we take a break. Back with Flair still wanting to fight but Vince McMahon comes in to have him escorted out. Instead, Vince makes HHH vs. Jericho for tonight.

Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Cryme Tyme

Non-title. Ted DiBiase comes out to offer a distraction….and Holly rolls JTG up for the pin in about ten seconds. Well at least they didn’t lose again.

Vince, $16 to a North Carolina fan in honor of the 16 time World Champion Ric Flair.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Mr. Kennedy/Mickie James

This Kennedy vs. Burchill feud needs to wrap up already if they want Kennedy to be something. Kennedy starts fast with a backdrop and stomps away in the corner. Burchill isn’t having that and pulls him into a chinlock before grinding a forearm into Kennedy’s face. Back up and Kennedy hits a running boot in the corner but Katie tags herself in. The fight with Mickie is on with Mickie’s running basement dropkick getting two. The men brawl to the floor, leaving Mickie to miss the top rope Thesz press. Katie grabs a backbreaker for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Kennedy and Burchill didn’t do much here but this was about Katie getting another win over Mickie to set up a likely title match. It’s nice to see some fresh blood in the title picture and Katie has done well enough in her chances so far. I can’t imagine she wins the title, but so far so good.

Vince, $174,984 to a VERY excited fan.

Vince, $75,000.

Night Of Champions rundown.

John Cena wishes HHH luck.

Vince, $300,000. We’ll be doing this again next week.

HHH vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. HHH knocks him down a few times to start as Jericho can’t get much going early on. A whip into the post bangs up Jericho’s shoulder and he falls out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Jericho choking on the ropes and then standing on HHH’s back to choke some more. Jericho misses a charge though and HHH slugs away, only to have the facebuster blocked. The Walls don’t work either and HHH hits a spinebuster. Jericho can’t get the Walls or the Lionsault and they fight out to the floor. Cue Lance Cade of all people to jump HHH for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Another nice match and that’s kind of the point here. I can go for not having a champion lose clean in a thrown together match and they covered that well here. Throw in Cade joining Jericho out of nowhere and things were certainly interesting. They covered a few things here and that’s nice to see for a main event.

Post match the beatdown is on but John Cena runs in for the save. HHH and Cena get in a fight but Jericho and Cade take them both out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The action was good and they’re turning Night Of Champions into something big, but at the end of the day, the Vince money stuff is getting annoying fast. They’re trying to throw in some jokes here and there but there is only so much that can be done with someone getting a phone call, saying a password, and winning money. Next week is the Draft though and that should change things up more than enough.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: June 9, 2008
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Both Night Of Champions and the Draft are looming, but this is about MONEY! Tonight is the official start of the new concept as Vince McMahon is going to be giving money to the fans. I’m sure this won’t dominate the conversation on commentary, even with John Cena challenging HHH at the pay per view is already set. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Vince McMahon and it’s money time. Vince has $1 million in cash brought out and put in a case, as he explains how to win (register, answer the password he gives you, win money). The password is “WWE Universe” and we’ll have our first phone call, for $200,000, after our first match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Paul Burchill

Katie Lea is here with Burchill, who is tossed outside in a hurry. Back in and Kennedy grabs a headlock as commentary talks about Kennedy’s rising popularity since he got rid of William Regal. Burchill belly to back suplexes Kennedy into the corner to escape and the chinlock goes on. That doesn’t last long as Kennedy is back up with a running boot to the head. The Mic Check finishes Burchill without much trouble.

Rating: C. Kennedy wins again and that is how you give someone a push. WWE is building him back up and winning a quick feud against Burchill should give him a nice step up. You can sense that WWE wants to do something big with Kennedy and he seems to be off to a nice restart.

Post match Katie comes in to slap Kennedy, allowing Burchill to hit the Twisted Sister (JR: “Holy Dee Snider!”

Here is Vince for the $200,000 giveaway and he even puts his glasses on to make the call. First up, Vince calls the wrong number, then he calls someone whose number plays music until the person answers the phone. The guy picks up but Vince hangs up on him, leaving JR and King a bit stunned. Vince: “You guys want to win $200,000 or not?” Vince calls the music guy again and this time he gets through, with the guy giving the password and winning the money. More later and hopefully with some more entertaining hijinks.

Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix

Non-title. Mickie kicks her in the ribs to start but a DDT attempt is countered into a kind of side slam for two. A slingshot suplex gives Beth two more but Mickie headscissors her way out of a powerbomb. Mickie hits a running dropkick to the face for two before the top rope Thesz press finishes Beth in a hurry.

Post match Beth decks Mickie but Melina runs in to go after Beth, including a top rope faceplant.

It’s time to give away more money and the guy wins $75,000.

John Cena and HHH run into each other in the back and talk about what a big match they’ll have at Night Of Champions. It’s not personal, but rather about being the best. HHH says he’s the best right now, but Cena reminds him of their Wrestlemania match. They’ll see what happens at Night Of Champions.

Charlie Haas of all people is here to help give away more money. Vince McMahon tries to call a few times and can’t get anywhere, as he makes jokes about modern technology and a “crack staff”. A guy named Gabe brings Vince another number, with Haas getting to dial. Actually never mind as Vince dials and gets through to a woman who wins $50,000.

Hang on though, as Vince says he’ll make it $100,000 if Haas can kiss a Diva. Cue Maria and kissing ensues, but Vince says if Haas can kiss another Diva, the woman gets another $25,000. Cue Mae Young, who grabs Haas by the trunks and kisses him. Ron Simmons comes out for his catchphrase as Young has Haas begging for help. That was as weird of a segment as you could have hoped to see.

JBL thinks no one deserves money but John Cena deserves a beating.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena

HHH is on commentary and a quick distraction lets JBL hammer away in the corner. JBL forearms him in the back but gets pulled down with the running bulldog. A swinging neckbreaker cuts Cena down for two but he gets up to stare JBL out to the floor. HHH and JBL have a standoff and we take a break.

Back with JBL kicking Cena in the face on the floor and dropping an elbow for a bonus. The cravate goes on back inside as we see Lawler on WWE.com for some reason. The sleeper goes on and Cena is in about as much trouble as you would expect for a sleeper to give John Cena. Another big boot cuts Cena down but he pops back up and initiates the finishing sequence. The AA is escaped though and the Clothesline From JBL gets a delayed two thanks to a foot on the rope. JBL loads up the announcers’ table, which takes long enough that Cena can grab a small package for the fast pin.

Rating: C. These two only have so much chemistry together and they don’t have great matches for two bigger stars. Granted it doesn’t help that Cena losing to JBL seems almost hard to fathom, especially with a big title match coming up. At least JBL got in some more offense here, but the whole rivalry being so one sided isn’t doing them any favors.

Post match Cena gets on the announcers’ table but HHH trips him down and leaves.

Vince McMahon comes out to give away more money, but first he talks to Lilian Garcia. He brings up her measurements and adds them up to 98, so let’s give away $98,000. A woman answers and wins.

Here is Chris Jericho for the Highlight Reel. His guest was a hero to Jericho as a child and during his career, so here is Shawn Michaels. Jericho talks about how Shawn is still banged up from the beating Batista gave him but brings up the “fake” knee injury. Shawn says the only person he lied to about the knee injury was Jericho himself, with Jericho talking about how he always get booed for telling the truth. Jericho wants to know how Shawn has become such a lying worm of a human being…and jumps him to start the fight. A low blow cuts Shawn off and Jericho says this is what Shawn wanted. Then he sends him face first into the Jeritron 5000 to bust Shawn’s eye open.

Post break, we see what we saw pre break.

Snitsky/Umaga vs. Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly

Non-title and my goodness how far Umaga has fallen. Cody dodges Snitsky to start before handing it off to Holly. That doesn’t go so well to start as Holly goes to the middle rope but Cody wanted a double suplex. The suplex works but Holly gets annoyed at Cody, allowing Snitsky to jump Holly and take over. Umaga comes in for a clothesline but Snitsky misses the big elbow for a crash. The double tag brings in Cody to slug away at Umaga but the dropkick only puts him on one knee. Umaga’s swinging release Rock Bottom is a swinging release faceplant this time and the Samoan Spike finishes Cody fast.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here and it’s not exactly interesting to see Cody and Holly losing over and over. They only felt like a makeshift team in the first place but they’ve been champions for months now. That doesn’t make for a great story and now it seems we are on the way towards their inevitable demise. I’m sure Snitsky and Umaga will get a title shot out of this though yes?

Post match Ted DiBiase Jr. comes out to say the champs need to get their act together before they lose the titles at Night Of Champions.

WWE does work with Make-A-Wish. That’s always awesome, as the smiles on those kids’ faces are amazing.

Back in the arena and Vince McMahon cuts off Jillian Hall and Trevor Murdoch’s singing to give someone $2, the value of Hall’s singing. That’s so cruel it’s almost hilarious. Vince calls someone else and gives him $200,000, earning some swearing in happiness.

Cryme Tyme vs. Santino Marella/Carlito

Santino and JTG start things off with Santino grabbing a rollup for a fast two. JTG does it right back for the same and Santino is already looking annoyed. Shad comes in for a slam before Alabama Slamming JTG onto Santino for two. JTG gets knocked out of the air though and Marella puts on a camel clutch. That’s broken up and everything breaks down with Shad hitting an STO for the pin on Santino.

Rating: C. Hopefully that starts the end of Carlito and Marella’s run as a team as my goodness they’re about as lame of a team as you can get. Other than that, this was a nice win for Cryme Tyme, as they always seem ready to move on up to the title picture. Not enough time to do much here, but at least the right team won.

Post match Vince McMahon calls Cryme Tyme to the stage as he gives away $51,998. Lawler: “Did he say $51,998?” JR: “That’s right Jerome.” And the fan wins.

Jeff Hardy vs. HHH

Non-title and John Cena is on commentary. HHH runs him over with a shoulder to start but stops to stare at Cena, allowing Hardy to hammer away. More right hands look to set up the Twist of Fate but HHH powers him off and hits the spinebuster. The jumping knee gets two on Hardy and we hit the abdominal stretch (complete with a rope grab of course).

The facebuster connects as commentary talks about the value of a good right hand. Back up and Hardy misses the Whisper in the Wind, allowing HHH to clothesline him out to the floor. Hardy manages to drop him ribs first onto the barricade but HHH hiptosses Hardy into Cena for the crash. That’s enough for Cena to pull HHH off the apron….and Hardy wins by countout. Ok then.

Rating: C+. They got to do a bit here but it was only about nine minutes long and with that screwy finish. Cena vs. HHH does feel like a huge match but I would imagine it headlining Summerslam rather than Night Of Champions. At the same time, Hardy is getting a nice push here as well, which could bode well for his future.

Post match Cena and HHH stare each other down on the floor before Hardy dives onto both of them.

Vince McMahon comes out and thanks everyone for making Million Dollar Mania work. Then he gives a fan $250,000 to end the show with promises of another $1 million giveaway next week.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was mostly all about the money and it’s not exactly an interesting thing to see. Other than Vince not being able to use a phone very well and some mishaps, it was a lot of “here’s a person winning money”. The rest of the show wasn’t very interesting either, though HHH vs. Cena does feel like a huge pay per view match. Other than that though, pretty weak stuff this time around.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 16, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This was a request for reasons not quite clear. It’s night after Summerslam and the big story is John Cena and company vanquished the Nexus, in a match that saw Cena overcome some rather insane odds. Other than that, Sheamus is still Raw World Champion, having retained the title over Randy Orton. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here is the Nexus to get things going, with commentary saying that the team showed they belong despite losing last night. Wade Barrett (the team’s leader) says they beat SIX of the best that Raw had to offer last night (keep in mind that it was a 7 on 7 tag match) and they are still ready to dominate WWE. They were defeated and that means there will be consequences for Raw.

Cue John Cena, to say that Barrett has the resolve of Winston Churchill and the toughness of Snooki from the Jersey Shore. Cena brings up how Barrett tapped out to cause the team to lose. The reality is that Nexus is expendable and Barrett must be kicking himself in the fish and chips over letting Daniel Bryan go. Then last night Bryan eliminated over half of the Nexus by himself as they proved that Nexus can be defeated.

You have the various members of the team, such as Otunga (an above average male escort), Tarver (looks like a stripper), Heath Slater (the chick from Wendy’s…..so Wendy), Darren Young (a cross between Cena and Buckwheat), Justin Gabriel (he has an “alternative” way of thinking) and Skip Sheffield (who thinks the Meow Mix theme).

All that matters is they are a bunch of humans, with Young tapping out in less than a minute. We get an email from the anonymous Raw General Manager (egads the flashbacks), saying tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a bunch of singles matches, with threats made against Nexus interference.

Barrett doesn’t like hearing that he tapped out, but promises that after tonight, Nexus will be stronger than ever. If any of them lose though, their spots might not be safe. Otunga says that’s fine, but if Barrett loses, someone else can step up and take the leadership. We get another email, saying Nexus can pick their matchups tonight. Except for Barrett that is, because he gets to face Chris Jericho. So there’s your show tonight, and they did it in about fifteen minutes. That’s fairly fast for some Raw opening segments.

Chris Jericho vs. Wade Barrett

Jericho kicks him down to start as the rest of Nexus is shown watching in the back. There’s the triangle dropkick to send Barrett outside but he’s able to knock Jericho off the apron for a breather. There’s a big boot to drop Jericho again and we hit the double arm crank. Jericho fights up and hits a middle rope dropkick, followed by the bulldog. A quick Wasteland attempt is countered into the Walls, sending Barrett straight to the rope. Back up and Jericho boots him in the face again, only to get caught with an enziguri. The Codebreaker is loaded up but Barrett reverses into the Wasteland for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. Jericho can be criticized for a lot of things, but he has a reputation as someone who will put just about anyone over. That is a big win for Barrett, especially after last night’s big loss. Barrett being able to hang with someone at Jericho’s level helps him a lot and they had a good match to show what Barrett can do.

This week’s guest hosts are Jason Sudekis, Charlie Day and Justin Long. They have a new moving coming out and seemingly have no idea what to talk about here so they just make weird noises. We hear some NBA insults before the team introduces the Hart Dynasty (Tag Team Champions).

Hold on though as we get another email. As of tonight, the Unified Tag Team Titles will now be known as the WWE Tag Team Titles, so here is Bret Hart with the new (bronze, because of course) titles. Thankfully that means dropping the dumb four belts for two people idea but here is Nexus on the screen. They have picked Hart’s opponent for tonight: Justin Gable, who promises a 450 to Bret. At least those morons were off quick.

We hear about Daniel Bryan replacing the injured Great Khali on Team WWE. No clip for that?

Michael Tarver vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan goes after the arm to start as Cole goes off about Bryan having no skill or change of becoming a star because he doesn’t eat meat. The rapid fire kicks to the chest in the corner have Tarver in more trouble and a missile dropkick makes it worse. Cue Miz and Alex Riley for a distraction though, allowing Tarver to get the fast rollup pin.

Post match Bryan goes after the Miz but Riley and Tarver take him down. The Skull Crushing Finale onto Miz’s Money In The Bank briefcase leaves Bryan laying.

Post break Miz and Riley talk about how they don’t like Bryan’s popularity, with Miz promising that Riley will be the next breakout star.

Darren Young tells Nexus that he’ll be facing John Cena. Pep talking ensues.

Justin Gabriel vs. Bret Hart

Actually hold on as we get an email saying there is a replacement.

Justin Gabriel vs. Randy Orton

Orton (in his weird bare arms phase) powers him into the corner to start but Gabriel flips over him and starts kicking away. As Lawler tries to figure out what kind of animal Gabriel is poking here (before finally remembering the whole VIPER thing), Orton snaps off the powerslam and the hanging DDT. The RKO is loaded up but cue Sheamus for….not a DQ as Orton brawls with him into the crowd for the countout instead. Well that was a dumb way out of the stipulation.

Post match Orton goes back inside to RKO Gabriel. With that not being enough, Orton grabs a chair and unloads on Sheamus to blow off some steam. That’s not enough so Orton drops Sheamus with the RKO on the floor for a bonus.

Skip Sheffield/David Otunga vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

Morrison works on Otunga’s arm to start before grabbing a Russian legsweep. It’s off to Sheffield to powerslam Truth but Otunga comes back in and gets Downward Spiraled. Cole asks what a Truth/Morrison win would mean for the locker room’s psyche. I’m thinking….not much? Anyway Morrison comes back in to pick up the pace but Sheffield runs him over. One heck of a running clothesline finishes Morrison to keep Nexus undefeated.

Melina/Eve Torres/Gail Kim vs. Jillian/Maryse/Alicia Fox

Gail easily takes Maryse down to start and calls her a gold digger. A crossbody gives Gail two and it’s off to Melina, who is taken into the wrong corner. Fox hits her always nice looking northern lights suplex and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up and Eve comes in with a bunch of dropkicks. Everything breaks down and Eve hits an enziguri out of the corner to drop Jillian. The moonsault is loaded up but Jillian rolls her up out of the corner for the big upset pin.

Edge isn’t surprised that he led Team WWE to victory last night but here is Heath Slater to interrupt. They’re facing each other tonight and Heath tries to get him to back out. That’s not going to work for Edge, who isn’t losing to a Wendy looking Edge wannabe. Heath decks him and leaves.

Edge vs. Heath Slater

Edge knocks him into the corner without too much trouble to start but Heath gets in a cheap shot. They head outside with Edge being sent into the barricade, followed by the armbar back inside. That’s broken up and Edge makes the clothesline comeback for two. Heath gets in his own clothesline for two, with a fan shouting “I HATE YOU HEATH SLATER! I HATE YOU!” Back up and Edge sends him (Heath, not the fan) outside but misses the baseball slide dropkick. The spear against the steps misses….and Heath beats the count back inside for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well that was nothing, but it’s getting more than a little tough to accept that after eliminating all seven members last night, Team WWE can’t beat a single member of the Nexus here. That doesn’t makes the most sense and it’s leading to some rather screwy finishes. This didn’t feel like something Edge would ever fall for and it’s not something I would buy him doing, which doesn’t exactly make for a strong finish.

Post match Edge hits a spear to blow off some steam.

The hosts are in the back with Great Khali and talk about long distances relationships (which is why Khali hasn’t been doing the Kiss Cam). Justin Long sees a picture of Khali’s girlfriend and the other hosts aren’t impressed. They then find out that Khali understands English, but he admits the girlfriend is ugly. Then he leaves with the Bellas. Cole: “WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?”

Video on Summerslam week, including a bunch of charity stuff.

John Cena vs. Darren Young

No entrance for Young and that can’t be a good sign. Hold on though as cue Nexus to watch from the stage and Young gets two off a fast rollup to start. Young grabs a headlock and my goodness you can hear the spots being called despite a fairly rowdy crowd. Cena reverses into a headlock of his own but gets suplexed down, setting up a legdrop for two more. Cole: “Remember Young has to win this match.” Lawler: “I think Cena has to win this match.” Cole: “I agree with you.”

A clothesline and neckbreaker give Young two each and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Back up and Cena….charges into an elbow in the corner as this has been one sided so far. Young drops a leg, Cena says “one more leg”, Young drops another leg. A northern lights suplex gets two more and Young is getting frustrated. With nothing else working, Young tosses him outside and then into the steps for a nine count. Back in and Cena quickly starts the comeback, setting up the Shuffle into the STFU for the tap.

Rating: C+. For someone who almost never got used on his own, Young can wrestle a decent match when he is given the chance. Granted having Cena call spots REALLY LOUDLY might have helped, but it was the best Young ever looked in WWE. At some point someone from Nexus had to lose and Young was the only one left by the end.

Post match the Nexus comes to the ring but let Cena go, instead circling Young. The big beatdown is on, with the Wasteland into the 450 splash destroying Young to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Normally I like the idea of focusing on one thing throughout the show but this was extreme even by WWE standards. Other than the women’s match and some dumb stuff with the hosts, this was all about one storyline. Throw in Nexus dominating most of the show and this wasn’t exactly interesting, with Nexus dominating most of the show despite losing last night. Not a good show, as the Nexus story was instantly a lot lamer after the Summerslam loss. Focusing on a big story is fine, but you have to mix it up a bit.

 

 

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One Night Stand 2008
Date: June 1, 2008
Location: San Diego Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 9,961
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Mike Adamle, Tazz

It’s time to go EXTREME as every match has some sort of a stipulation announced. The big Raw main event is HHH defending the Raw World Title against Randy Orton in a Last Man Standing match. On the other side, the vacant Smackdown World Title is literally up for grabs in a TLC match between Edge and Undertaker. Let’s get to it.

The opening match focuses on how everything is EXTREME with all kinds of matches.

Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy

Falls Count Anywhere. Umaga goes with the power to start but a quick Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy a breather. Hardy goes up top but dives into a swinging release Rock Bottom. Umaga misses a charge and falls to the floor though, allowing Hardy to hit a dive for two. They fight into the crowd and then up to the set, where Hardy hits him in the face with a traffic cone. That just earns him a superkick but Umaga misses a charge.

The fight heads into the back, where Umaga shrugs off a fire extinguisher blast and sends him into a wall. Hardy walks up the steps and slides down the handrail to take Umaga down in a rather unique crash. They wind up outside with Hardy being sent into an anvil case for two, only to send Umaga into the back door of an equipment truck. Hardy climbs up onto another truck and knocks Umaga down, setting up a Swanton off of said truck for the pin in one of the most unique looking dives you’ll ever see.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t the longest match, but I can absolutely appreciate them doing something other than the same old stuff. This was only in and around the ring for a minute or two at the start and then it felt like something of an old school hardcore match. It’s nice to see them going into a few different places for a change. Have some fun with the match, especially when you can open the show.

Earlier today, Mick Foley explained a stretcher match, complete with a demonstration.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Big Show vs. CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer

Singapore cane match (meaning each corner has a pole with a cane at the top) and the winner gets the ECW Title shot later this month at Night Of Champions. Bam Neely is here with Chavo to make it six people out there at once. Everyone goes after Show to start and it goes about as well as you would expect, with Show being the last man standing.

The others get back up though and take Show down, setting up the quadruple sticking. With Show down on the floor, everyone quickly turns on each other until Chavo takes Punk outside. Chavo’s big swing hits NFL star Shawn Merriman, who takes it back and hits Chavo instead. Show picks up the steps so Morrison takes out his knee, sending Show’s face into the steps.

Back in and Dreamer counters the GTS into a Texas Cloverleaf but Morrison makes the save. A Tower of Doom takes out everyone….except for Show, who pops up. Neely gets taken down and Morrison is beaten up next. Back in and Show unloads with the stick and chokeslams Dreamer. Show’s eyes are busted open from the steps but he’s fine enough to hit a big cane shot to pin Dreamer.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work so well as while it was mainly about the sticks, those things kind of lose their impact rather quickly. Show was the monster in there and it makes sense that he wins, though they didn’t quite hide what was likely to happen from the start. Not an all time bad match or anything close, but more just a bad concept.

Vince McMahon promises to give away money on Raw. And no, WWE employees like interviewer Tod Grisham, are not eligible. Ron Simmons comes in to voice his displeasure.

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

First Blood. Cena wastes no time in pulling off a turnbuckle (revealing a large yellow pad) and then knocks JBL outside. JBL goes face first into the announcers’ table but, after a trip back inside, manages to low bridge him back outside. Some right hands have Cena in more trouble and a big boot makes it even worse. It’s already time for the chair but the big swing only hits post.

A microphone to the head drops Cena again and they head back inside for more mic shots. Cena is right back up with the comeback sequence (seems rather early) but JBL isn’t about to get FU’ed this soon. There’s a posting and Cena is down hard but not bleeding. A DDT onto the steps is broken up and now it’s Cena with the mic to the head.

Back in and JBL kicks him rather low and a ram into the exposed buckle makes it worse. With that not working, JBL gets in a hard shot to the ribs and grabs a chain, only to walk into an FU. JBL is able to hit a big boot and Cena gets tied up in the ropes (uh oh). That means it’s time for a bullwhip but Cena gets free and chains him down. The STFU with the whip goes on and JBL is bleeding from the mouth so the referee calls it.

Rating: B-. They had a few creative spots in there but the ending left a good bit to be desired. I can go for the idea of bleeding from the mouth for a different way to go, though that doesn’t make it all the more interesting. Also, you would think this was a way for JBL to win without Cena taking a fall but instead it’s Cena getting him again. Oh well.

Randy Orton comes in to see Batista and pitches a reuniting if they’re drafted to the same show. Batista doesn’t say a word.

Beth Phoenix vs. Melina

I Quit and they’ve hated each other for a while now. One of Melina’s photographers falls down on the way to the ring for a funny blooper. Beth trash talks her to the ropes to start but Melina snatches a guillotine of all things. That’s broken up with a backbreaker and Beth bends her over the knee for a bonus. What looked to be a slam off the top is reversed into a faceplant from Melina, who grabs a Muta Lock. Beth breaks that up as well and then drives her hard into the corner.

The over the shoulder backbreaker has Melina in more trouble before Beth switches off to an armbar. Melina is able to kick her into the post though and the rather logical Fujiwara armbar goes on. Make that a cross armbreaker but Beth powers up into a toss powerbomb. A wheelbarrow faceplant sets up a double chickenwing on Melina, whose legs are bent up against Beth’s as well. Beth switches into a neck crank, making Melina’s head touch the bottoms of her feet and that’s finally enough for the submission.

Rating: C+. That ending alone was enough to make this worth a look as no one is supposed to bend that way. It looked like Beth was about to break her and that is the kind of painful ending you want in a match like this. Beth almost has to be getting ready to go after the title again, as she is such a force over the other women that it is hard to not head in that direction again.

Mickie James comes to see John Cena in the trainer’s room but Mike Adamle comes out of the bathroom. He invites them to Tijuana with them but that’s a no, as is their status as a couple. Instead, Cena talks to Mickie about a rear naked choke.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Batista. Shawn beat him before but faked a knee injury to do so, which hasn’t set well with Batista. Tonight, it’s a stretcher match for revenge.

Shawn Michaels vs. Batista

Stretcher match. Shawn’s charges don’t work to start and Batista drops him with a clothesline. Another clothesline puts Shawn on the floor but he manages to send Batista into the steps. A stretcher shot to the ribs puts Batista down and Shawn does it again for a bonus. Batista is back up with a Batista Bomb attempt but Shawn reverses into a guillotine choke. The partially out Batista is put on the stretcher but it’s way too early to go anywhere.

Shawn gets rammed into the apron and then the barricade, followed by one heck of a clothesline. The big running powerslam looks to set up the spear but it only hits the post. Shawn’s forearm into the nipup into the top rope elbow connects but Sweet Chin Music is blocks. The Batista Bomb is escaped as well and there’s the superkick to put Batista on the stretcher (in a nice crash).

Batista gets back off of it though, meaning Shawn gets to spear him with the stretcher again. With the power not working, Batista goes with the smarts and see-saws the stretcher into Shawn’s face for a creative spot. Back in and the spinebuster into the Batista Bomb puts Shawn down again but here is Chris Jericho….to cheer Shawn?

Back in and Batista says he’s sorry but loves Shawn, setting up another Batista Bomb. Shawn is wheeled up to the finish line, only to have Jericho stop him for another pep talk. It’s enough to get Shawn off the stretcher (ok by falling but off), so Batista goes and gets the steps. The spinebuster onto the steps is enough for Batista to get the win.

Rating: B. Commentary made a good point by saying that Batista wanted to hurt Shawn rather than beat him, and that is exactly how this went. Batista destroyed Shawn in the end here and of course Shawn knows EXACTLY how to sell that. It was a heck of a beating near the end, though Shawn was putting in a rather awesome fight until they got there. Jericho’s part will probably be brought up later, but here it was just a little weird. Either way, best match of the night so far here.

We recap Randy Orton vs. HHH for the Raw World Title, which is about Orton wanting to get the title back after losing a few times. Orton beat him to win the title in a Last Man Standing match last year so let’s do it again here.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is defending and it’s Last Man Standing. After a weapons check (Why?), we’re ready to go, with Orton sending him outside to start. HHH gets in a whip to the steps and it’s time to go into the announcers’ table. Back in and HHH rips at Orton’s face before sending him shoulder first into the post (been done too much tonight).

Orton’s shoulder is fine enough to hit a dropkick though and they head outside. HHH hammers away on the announcers’ table but Orton slugs his way out of a Pedigree attempt. The DDT onto the floor has HHH down for about eight so Orton hammers away at the head. The frustrated Orton peels the floor mat back but the RKO is blocked.

Instead Orton grabs the steps and blasts HHH in the face for a nine. Now it’s time for some choking with an electrical cord before the RKO is loaded up. HHH shoves him over the top this time and Orton lands HARD on his shoulder. Orton can be heard saying he’s broken his collarbone but he gets up anyway, allowing HHH to hit a quick sledgehammer shot to retain.

Rating: B-. Well you can only rate this one so well as the injury derailed everything they were doing. Orton was seriously hurt so there wasn’t much of a choice but to wrap it up. What we got before that was pretty good as these two can occasionally work well together, but as usual, it wasn’t exactly some classic. We won’t be seeing Orton for a good while though as that was a horrible landing.

Orton gets up and oh yeah that thing is HORRIBLE looking. Orton walks around for a bit to yell at fans and we get some replays, likely to try and kill off a few minutes.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match, with Edge vs. Undertaker in a TLC match for the vacant title. They’ve fought for the title for months but Edge can’t beat him. Instead Edge’s girlfriend/Smackdown GM Vickie Guerrero has been helping, including this time as she is giving Edge his signature match for the title.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

For the vacant title in a TLC match and if Undertaker loses, he’s gone. Undertaker hammers away to start and hits a rather early Old School . Edge is able to send him outside though and some tables are stacked up. As usual that takes too long though and Undertaker fights back. There are now four tables stacked up 2×2 and the first ladder is set up. Undertaker would rather put it on the corner though, where Edge sends him face first into the steel.

Edge gets sent into the corner as well, allowing Undertaker to climb. They fight on the ladder but then knock each other onto a ladder in the corner. It’s Undertaker getting the better of things and kicking Edge in the face, setting up the apron legdrop, which hits raised chair. Edge bridges the ladder between the ring and the apron, which cannot end well. A chair to the head drops Undertaker and then Edge does it again for a bonus.

With Undertaker on a table, Edge dives off the announcers’ table to crush him again. Back in and Edge cuts him down with a spear, followed by Undertaker’s leg being crushed in the ladder. Two more chair shots to the head keep Undertaker down but getting another chair for some reason lets him get up.

Undertaker throws him through a ladder and to the floor, but cue the Edgeheads for the save. That doesn’t last long as Undertaker fights up again and puts them through a table each. Edge is back up again now and sends Undertaker’s knee into the barricade. With Edge climbing, Undertaker Last Rides him off the ladder and through two tables for a huge crash.

Now it’s Bam Neely and Chavo Guerrero coming in for another save so Undertaker chairs both of them down. Undertaker goes up again but this time Edge shoves it over, with Undertaker crashing through four tables at ringside (geez that’s a huge bump or him, or anyone for that matter). That’s finally enough for Edge to win the title.

Rating: B. It’s quite the spectacle, with Edge pulling out every cheating tactic he had available (which granted in a match like this means “send in the goons”) and Undertaker doing a bunch of bigger than usual spots. Other than that, it was time for Edge to get the title back, or at least beat Undertaker, as Undertaker had beaten him over and over. Now Undertaker can go away for a bit and come back looking for revenge, which is often what he does best. Good main event, but not a classic.

Vickie Guerrero walks out and celebrates with La Familia. Undertaker gets up and does the big slow exit to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a strange show in that the matches were mostly good, but they weren’t that interesting. The problem here comes down to the fact that we’ve covered almost every facet of most of these feuds and it’s time for something new. That’s the biggest problem with WWE at the moment, as the build for the last few weeks has only been so good and now it is time to move on to something else. Good show, but this really needs to be the turning point to a new set of stories.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 26, 2008
Location: Pepsi Center, Denver, Colorado
Attendance: 16,524
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before One Night Stand and the end of last week’s show set up a pair of huge matches for the show. Now we are getting ready for JBL vs. John Cena in a first blood match and HHH vs. Randy Orton in a last man standing match for HHH’s Raw World Title. I’m sure we’ll get some more tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Memorial Day video.

Opening sequence.

Vince McMahon joins us on the Titantron to say William Regal got what he deserved last week, but are the fans getting what they deserve? They deserve appreciation, and tonight they will receive it like never before. He’s open to suggestions, including from the wrestlers. By the end of the night, fans will receive appreciation like they have never seen.

Here are HHH and Randy Orton for a face to face standoff. Orton is asked about how he beat HHH in a last man standing match before, but it was HHH’s third match of the night and Orton’s second. Orton is sick of having his accomplishments downplayed, because what matters is that he beat HHH in this very match.

HHH says the fans are laughing at Orton because he’s a censored. He isn’t laughing though, because Orton has a tendency to find a cheap way out. If Orton wants to be the best, he has to face the best over and over. Orton says HHH doesn’t thrive on competition because he either brings in his threats or just flat out eliminates him.

Like Shawn Michaels or Evolution, because HHH knows he needed to fear them. HHH says Evolution was about making Orton realize his potential but he isn’t just going to walk away. Orton promises to win and goes to leave, but HHH promises to end the Age Of Orton like it never happened. There wasn’t much left to be said about this feud so this was nothing we haven’t heard before.

Melina vs. Jillian Hall

Beth Phoenix is on commentary. Jillian jumps her to start and hits a flipping faceplant before hitting some kicks to the back. Melina fights back and elbows her in the face, setting up an Indian Deathlock for the fast tap.

Chris Jericho comes in to see Vince McMahon with an idea to appreciate the fans: a match with Shawn Michaels tonight. Deal, and we’ll make it non-title. Cryme Tyme comes in and steal some of Williams Regal’s stuff to sell.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly

Non-title. Rhodes dropkicks London down to start but a double dropkick puts Rhodes down for two. Holly comes in to knock Kendrick down but Rhodes misses a middle rope crossbody. It’s off to London to dropkick and hurricanrana Holly as everything breaks down. London tries to skin the cat, only to get caught in the Alabama Slam for the pin.

Rating: C. Fast paced stuff here but they only had so much time to make it work. London and Kendrick are still an entertaining team but for some reason WWE insists on sticking with Rhodes and Holly as champions. The tag division barely exists, though you would think WWE might want to go with the better of the two teams here.

Post match here is Ted DiBiase of all people. He has a special moment for us, in the form of the newest member of the Raw roster: his son Ted DiBiase! Ted Jr. says he has always wanted to become a champion and that is what he is going to do in his debut match. So Holly and Rhodes need to pay attention, because everybody has a price, but he is priceless. That’s a great line.

Roddy Piper is training Jimmy Kimmel’s Cousin Sal for his match against Santino Marella. Kimmel comes in to watch the training and isn’t sure if this is going well as Piper beats up Sal. Oddly enough this is included on Peacock, along with a recap of last week’s segment, which wasn’t on Peacock.

Mickie James suggests a contest to Vince McMahon where schools get to say why they love WWE and the winner gets a Diva For A Day. JBL comes in to say that sounds like an escort service (working for strangers you see) and suggests the ring mat, covered in John Cena’s blood on Sunday, be cut up and sold.

Some soldiers wish us Happy Memorial Day.

John Bradshaw Layfield/Umaga vs. John Cena/Jeff Hardy

Cena and JBL start things off but let’s go with Umaga instead. The FU attempt doesn’t work but Umaga misses a charge in the corner so Cena can slug away. The swinging release Rock Bottom cuts Cena off though and we take a break. Back with JBL hammering Hardy into the corner and whipping him into another one.

The abdominal stretch goes on but Hardy slips out and hits a Whisper In The Wind. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Cena and house is cleaned in a hurry. Umaga knocks Cena into Hardy for the tag but the Swanton misses. With Cena and Umaga on the floor, the Clothesline From JBL finishes Hardy off.

Rating: C+. The ending came a bit out of nowhere but it was a good enough match to get the people involved out there. Umaga vs. Hardy has been a bit forgotten amid the two main event level matches at One Night Stand so giving them a bit of exposure was a good idea. Then again JBL vs. Cena isn’t exactly thrilling and it’s more interesting to go in another direction, even for one match.

Shawn Michaels comes to see Vince McMahon and doesn’t buy Vince wanting to appreciate the audience. Vince says Shawn will have to give the devil his due. Shawn: “You would know about that wouldn’t you?”

Video on the recent tour of Mexico.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito

Carlito takes him down fast and grabs a quickly broken chinlock. The Backstabber is loaded up but Kennedy reverses into the Mic Check for the fast win.

Post match Katie Lea Burchill comes out to say some people aren’t happy with Kennedy getting rid of William Regal. Paul Burchill pops up from behind and lays Kennedy out.

Trevor Murdoch tries to sing a country version of No Chance but Vince McMahon sends him away.

One Night Stand rundown.

Video on Randy Orton vs. HHH.

More troops say hi.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. They go to the mat a few times to start and that’s good for a standoff. Shawn sends him crashing out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Shawn fighting out of a chinlock but Jericho takes him into the corner for some stomping. Jericho’s bulldog is blocked with a shove into the corner and there’s the nipup.

The superkick is countered into a Walls attempt, which is countered into a small package for two. The second Walls attempt works far better but Shawn makes the ropes. That doesn’t work for Jericho, who takes him tot he floor and grabs the Walls again for the double countout.

Rating: B-. Jericho vs. Shawn is going to work almost every time but Jericho is teetering on the brink of a heel turn. I’m curious to see how they get to what should be Jericho as quite the villain, as they could go a few different ways to get there. I’m not sure how much we’ll get out of the Shawn vs. Batista match to get there, but they have an interesting story on the way there.

Post match Jericho grabs a chair but puts it down.

Here is Vince McMahon for the big announcement despite there not being much time left. Vince walks through the roster on the stage before talking about how everyone together. Let’s do that in four weeks with the WWE Draft. Until then, for the next four weeks, Vince is going to give away MONEY. What if he gave away a thousand dollars? Ten thousand dollars? Or even A HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS? Heck he’s a billionaire, so over the next week, he’s going to give away the sum of ONE MILLION DOLLARS. End of show.

Overall Rating: C+. They did a nice job of covering just about everything on this side of the One Night Stand card and that is the right idea. Other than that, the money thing at the end was more than a bit different, but at least they’re trying to set something up for after the pay per view. WWE certainly needs something fresh at the moment as they continue to milk another pay per view out of feuds they’ve been running for a long time. Not a bad show, but the build to Summerslam needs to start fast.

 

 

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Summerslam 2007
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

This is a bit of a weird show as it is built around the two World Title matches, but two of the other big matches involve people who have been gone for months. We’ll be seeing Randy Orton challenging John Cena for the Raw World Title while Great Khali defends the Smackdown World Title against Batista. At the same time, Rey Mysterio and HHH are back after some long layoffs, making the build for this a bit weird. Let’s get to it.

The opening video narrates a look at Mysterio returning and the regular World Title matches, making it feel like a TV show.

Then we get the REAL opening, with the “We Can Rebuild Him” video on the returning HHH, the actual star of the show.

Kane vs. Finlay

Grudge match after Finlay accidentally knocked a cup of coffee Kane. Worked for Jericho in 2000. Kane, with his injured ribs, knocks Finlay into the corner to start and grabs a slam to keep him in early trouble. Some uppercuts in the corner set up some choking on the ropes before Kane knocks him over the top. That’s not enough for Kane, who boots him in the face, only to get hit in the ribs.

Back in and a backsplash gives Finlay two and it’s off to a half crab. Kane fights up again and it’s an enziguri to put Finlay down for a change. A one armed side slam gives Kane two and there’s the top rope clothesline to rock Finlay again. Finlay is right back with a shot to the ring but it’s Hornswoggle time.

You don’t do that to Kane, who shoves Hornswoggle down but can’t chokeslam Finlay due to the bad ribs. JBL: “He has won a WWE Championship with that chokeslam.” No, he hasn’t. Finlay unhooks the turnbuckle pad, which is enough for him to sneak in the Shillelagh (with an assist from Hornswoggle) shot to the ribs for two. That’s too much for Kane, who sends him into the post and grabs the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was about taking two hard hitting guys and letting them beat on each other for a little while. That’s how you start a show and it worked well enough, as they both know how to do this match really well. Not a classic opener or anything close, but it was fun to watch two guys like this do their thing.

Vince McMahon and Coach joins the General Managers in a party themed move. McMahon thinks the mother of his illegitimate son wants a payday but here is Santino Marella to suggest he is said son. That’s rejected, so here is MVP to say he wants to issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy for something other than a match. Vince is down for that, but William Regal thinks Vince’s son would be more, uh, regal. Everyone else leaves and Vince seems disturbed by the thought of being with an Englishwoman.

Video on Rey Mysterio. Did you know he’s back tonight?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

Umaga is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. They stare at each other to start and Umaga punches both of them in the face before sending them into various corners. Carlito and Kennedy need a breather on the floor and decide to go for a distraction, which goes horribly wrong as well. Kennedy saves Carlito from the running hip attack in the corner though and it’s a running boot to drive Umaga’s head into the steps. That leaves Kennedy to stomp on Carlito inside but he’s right back with a springboard elbow.

They seem to be going as fast as they can because Umaga is up, meaning it’s an uppercut from the floor to drop Carlito. Kennedy saves him from a Stinger Splash in the corner though and a shot to Umaga’s head gets two. Umaga isn’t about to get double suplexed so he suplexes both of them at the same time instead. The monster awakens and wrecks both of them, including the running hip attack in the corner to Carlito. Kennedy knocks Umaga outside…but Umaga is right back in with the Samoan Spike to finish Kennedy to retain.

Rating: C. It was little more than a Raw match and that didn’t exactly leave us with a great showcase. The good thing is that Umaga looked like a monster out there as Kennedy and Carlito combined completely failed to stop him. That’s the kind of win that will build Umaga back up even more and that is going to make the person who finally stops him look even bigger, as it should.

Undertaker is back at Unforgiven.

We recap Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Chavo put Rey on the shelf for knee surgery and is now laughing at the idea that Rey is coming back. Revenge seems imminent.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Rey’s torso is covered in silver paint because he can be a bit odd with some of his costume ideas. They talk trash to each other to start until Rey hits him in the face. Chavo goes after the knee but Rey slips away without much effort. The test of strength is on, allowing them to flip around a lot with neither getting very far.

Another try for the knee works better for Chavo as the leg is wrapped around the middle rope. Rey isn’t having that and kicks Chavo outside before taking him back in for some knee work of his own. There’s a middle rope hurricanrana to send Chavo flying again but he catches Rey in the Tree of Woe to go after the knee again. Said knee is wrapped around the post as we get to the meat of things. The stretch muffler has Rey in more trouble and there’s a dropkick to the knee.

The knee is fine enough to hit an enziguri but it gives out on the 619 attempt. Rey has to get to the ropes to get out of a half crab and now it’s Chavo’s turn to be in the Tree of Woe. That doesn’t last long either so Rey sends him outside for a running seated senton off the apron. Rey misses a high crossbody back inside though and it’s a Gory Bomb to give Chavo two. Another 619 attempt misses and Chavo hits a few Amigos. Rey isn’t having that though and it’s the 619 into the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: B-. As expected, this was a good match between two talented wrestlers, though I’m still not sure how much interest there was going to be in Chavo as a focal point. He’s a very good worker, but he is more a solid hand than a featured player. That being said, this was all about Rey being back and getting to shake the rust off, which worked well in his first match in a long time.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell say Rey Mysterio’s return may have been great, but HHH’s return will be an entrance, followed by him bowing down to King Booker.

Battle Royal

Maria, Beth Phoenix, Melina, Jillian Hall, Mickie James, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Kristal, Michelle McCool, Layla, Kelly Kelly, Brooke

The winner gets a future Women’s Title shot against Candice Michelle, who is at ringside. It’s a brawl to start, as it should be, with a bunch of brawling around the ring. Jillian gets rid of Maria and Layla is gone soon after. Brooke seems to have been tossed somewhere in there too and Kristal gets rid of Victoria (that’s an upset).

Michelle knocks Kristal out and there goes Kelly (through the ropes, because over the top is a bit too much). Torrie helps get rid of Jillian and Melina knocks out Mickie. We’re down to Michelle, Melina, Beth and Torrie, with Melina being knocked out by Michelle. Beth gets rid of Torrie without much effort and we’re down to two. Michelle tries a kick and is tossed out to give Beth the win.

Rating: D. What else did you expect here? There are only a few women who are ready to challenge for the title and Beth is about as good of a choice as you could have here. Beth is a different kind of monster and we should be in for a showdown with Candice. At least they kept this moving, as that is the best idea they could have had here.

Almost immediately as soon as the match is over, here is MVP, with a few guys carrying a cooler, to say no one paid to see these women. You need him on the show, so MVP talks about how he used to drink beer. His tastes have changed now that he is rich, but tonight it’s time for a beer drinking contest with Matt Hardy.

Hold on though, as Matt brings up MVP using a surrogate for their boxing match. Well Matt (who somehow knew this would be a drinking contest) has his own surrogate: Steve Austin. Cue Austin, who warms up for the contest with some rope running and pushups but it’s a Stunner before the first beer is consumed. A lot of drinking ensues. Nothing wrong with a surprise appearance like this, even if Austin didn’t say a word.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

Vince McMahon is still in the office with the bosses when Cryme Tyme interrupts. They think “Vinnie Mac” (Vince: “Vinnie Mac?”) might be their dad and it’s time to chant MONEY MONEY YEAH YEAH. Everyone dances around Vince, including William Regal in a hat. Cue Ron Simmons for the catchphrase.

Video on John Morrison.

ECW World Title: John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Morrison is defending and gets taken down without much trouble to start. Punk wins a grapple off to start and hits a hiptoss before hitting a triangle dropkick to the floor. Back up and Morrison hits a neckbreaker onto the apron, allowing him to hammer away with some right hands.

We hit the chinlock with an arm trap, which Tazz doesn’t seem to notice as a version of the Tazmission. A regular chinlock doesn’t work either and Punk is back up with a middle rope crossbody for two of his own. The scoop powerslam gets two more but it’s a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to give Morrison two more. Back up and Punk crotches Morrison on the top and they’re both down for a bit. Punk’s top rope hurricanrana is countered though and Morrison puts his feet on the ropes for the stolen pin to retain.

Rating: C. These two have had more than a few matches now and it wasn’t exactly anything better than their previous stuff. Punk has lost to Morrison time after time now and there isn’t much left for these two to do with each other. The other problem is that there isn’t anything else for Punk on ECW, but he has to win something soon. Not a bad match, but it could have been on ECW TV.

King Booker vs. HHH

This is HHH’s first match since January after another torn quadricep. Booker, with Queen Sharmell, thinks there is only one king around here. Naturally HHH gets a big special entrance video, including the WE CAN REBUILD HIM deal. Commentary tries to put it over like the 2002 MSG return and it’s just not there.

Booker slugs away to start but gets punched outside without much trouble. Back in and HHH gets cut off with an elbow to the head, only to get knocked right back to the floor. HHH gets to punch him in the face a bit more, setting up the facebuster for two back inside. Booker gets smart by going after the leg, only to have HHH take out Booker’s leg instead.

The Figure Four goes on so Sharmell rakes the eyes for a save. The slugout goes to HHH, and he tosses Booker outside for a whip into the steps. They head back inside for the spinebuster but Booker breaks up the Pedigree attempt. Some knees to the head set up a side slam but Booker misses the Houston Hangover. The Pedigree finishes Booker without much effort.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t a disaster but it was far from as good as you would have expected from these two. HHH shrugged off everything Booker threw at him and then won clean in the end, which isn’t exactly surprising. I would have expected a bit more than about eight minutes, but odds are they didn’t want to leave HHH out there to get winded early. This could have been worse, though it was pretty lame, all things considered.

We recap Batista vs. Great Khali for the Smackdown World Title. Khali is the new unstoppable monster and Batista is one of the only people who can come after him. That’s a bit of a problem though, as Khali’s Claw/vice grip are rather deadly.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista is challenging and gets pounded down in the corner to start. Khali sends him outside in a heap and hits the big chop on the way back in. That’s only good for two so Khali sends him shoulder first into the post, setting up the nerve hold. The rope is grabbed, meaning it’s a forearm to the back and another nerve hold goes on.

Cole describes the reaction as the fans getting restless, which is certainly one way to go. Batista fights up and blocks the vice grip, setting up the spinebuster. For some reason Batista goes up but dives into the double chokeslam for two. Runjin Singh throws in a chair and Khali hits Batista for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Restless would be one way to go, but the better term would likely be “bored out of their minds”. This was a bunch of sitting around doing nothing until Khali did something pretty stupid and now we are likely in for a rematch, because that is what we needed here. I get the idea of the chase, but the idea of Khali being involved in anything fast paced is disturbing.

Post match Batista gets the chair and blasts Khali for a change. JBL is livid at Khali for doing something so stupid, which is a fair assessment.

It’s back to the office, where Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young come in to see Vince. They don’t think they’re the mother of the son, but Mae wants some relations with Vince RIGHT NOW to make a new son. Mae jumps him and leaves a taste in Vince’s mouth…which he kind of likes. Coach: “That’s disgusting sir!” Vince: “Old chicken makes good soup.”

We recap John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title. Cena has been champion for almost a year but Orton has been on a path of destruction. Now it’s time for Cena to stop him, because no one else can do it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and gets headlocked to start, with the fans really not being behind Cena. The headlock (and really blatant spot calling) continue until Orton reverses into one of his own. Cena can’t counter into the STFU and Orton stomps him down. Back up and Orton keeps it simple with a hard shot to the head which might cause Cena to miss a crossbody.

That means Orton can knock Cena off the apron and onto the announcers’ table for two back inside. The rather aggressive chinlock goes on but Cena suplexes his way to freedom. A missed charge lets Orton get in some more stomps but he misses the big knee. The powerslam doesn’t miss though and we’re right back to the chinlock. Cena tries to power up again so Orton grabs a sleeper with a bodyscissors.

More power gets Cena out of trouble, this time by driving Orton into the corner. Now the comeback is on, including the Shuffle, but the FU is countered into the backbreaker. There’s the hanging DDT as JR is wondering when the concussion is coming. The RKO is countered but Cena misses another charge and falls over the top. Back in and Cena tries the Throwback but winds up with a Blockbuster, which is quite the odd visual coming from him.

The top rope Fameasser connects and Orton is in trouble again. This time the FU is countered with a neck snap across the top. That’s enough to load up the Punt but Orton takes too long and gets pulled into the STFU. The rope gets Orton out of trouble and he grabs a quick RKO for two (that’s still a rare kickout). Cena is done playing around though and hits the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This was a big time fight and Cena felt like he went through a long battle. They were trading big moves but the ending was a bit of a letdown, as Cena kicked out of the RKO and then finished him clean. That doesn’t leave much of a future for the feud, but never let it be said that WWE won’t let something continue despite it looking like it was wrapping up. What we got was good though, as these two were starting to feel it when they went home.

Overall Rating: C. The main event helps a lot and there was enough good to make it work, but Batista vs. Khali was horrible and HHH’s return was a disappointment. It was a bunch of short matches too, with only Orton vs. Cena and Mysterio vs. Guerrero breaking ten minutes. At least we got some good stuff in there though, including a solid main event. Good, but certainly not great show.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.