Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 16,697
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

We’re getting close to the end of the run here with only three shows left. Tonight we’ve got the Rumble of course along with Undertaker defending against Mysterio and Sheamus defending against Orton. I remember really liking this one as the new generation had arrived and was rising up the card. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the Road to Wrestlemania is beginning and how it determines what happens for months to come. This is called the most star studded Rumble ever, which is a tagline that has been used before.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Christian is defending and man that ECW ring announcer has an annoying voice. Regal is with Jackson here. According to Striker, Jackson went to Columbia Law School. Now there’s a factoid that fell through the cracks. Jackson shoves Christian into the corner and then does it again into the ropes so the champion slaps him in the face. After a brief chase, Christian dropkicks Jackson out to the floor.

The springboard plancha takes Jackson out and we head back in. Christian finally gets caught in the corner and pounded on before having the Killswitch easily blocked. Instead Christian chokes away on the ropes and hits another shot to the face. Jackson throws Christian to the floor where Regal tries to throw him back in, earning himself an ejection. Off to a neck crank back inside which Jackson picks up into a kind of cobra clutch slam for two.

A vertical suplex gets two for Big Zeke and it’s time for more choking. A sunset flip is easily blocked by Jackson and it’s back to the chinlock. Striker tries to figure out what a peep is, as he knows it as a something made of chocolate. Some shots to the face get Christian out of trouble for awhile, or at least until a clothesline to the back of the head gets two.

Jackson hooks both of Christian’s arms back for another hold before putting the champion on top. The superplex is blocked and Christian hits a top rope back elbow for two (LOVE that move). Jackson’s big clothesline misses and a middle rope dropkick gets two for the champion. A spinwheel kick gets two on Jackson but a swan dive misses and gives Zeke a near fall as does a backbreaker.

The tornado DDT gets ANOTHER two for Christian so Jackson takes his head off with a clothesline. Off to a sleeper from Christian when the Killswitch doesn’t work but Jackson counters into a powerslam position to ram Christian’s back into the buckle. Christian slides down Jackson’s back and grabs the Killswitch out of nowhere to retain.

Rating: C+. Trim two minutes out of this and it goes WAY up in quality. The period of near falls went on too long without getting any significant heat from the crowd. Jackson would get the title in a little over two weeks on the final episode of ECW because if there’s one man that should be the final ECW Champion, it’s a musclehead that could barely get through a five minute match most of the time.

Cryme Tyme come in to try to get a second spot in the Rumble from Teddy and Tiffany. Khali says “no dice homeslice” to selling their spot because he’s keeping it real. Apparently he’s learned his English from Family Matters (Singh’s words, not mine). Ok then. Anyway US Champion the Miz comes in and laughs which causes him to have to defend against MVP.

Orton is in the back when Cody Rhodes comes in. He’s there for Randy in the title match tonight but that’s not all. Apparently DiBiase isn’t in on this because his mind is on winning the Rumble and taking the title from Orton.

US Title: The Miz vs. MVP

A quick clothesline gets two for MVP and he works on the champ’s ribs to start. Miz gets a boot up in the corner to slow him down but MVP comes right back with a belly to back suplex for two. They head to the floor for this gem from Striker: “Miz is one of the most recognizable faces on this planet.” I don’t think Miz is one of the most recognizable faces in this match.

Back in and Miz sends MVP to the apron and gets kicked into the table on the floor. Not that this is treated like anything of note because the announcers are laughing about Sherri Shepard from The View. Miz sends shoulders into MVP’s ribs in the corner followed by the running corner clothesline. A top rope double ax gets two for Miz and we hit the chinlock.

After that eats up some time, MVP pounds away with all of his usual stuff. Ballin hits and a running boot to the side of the head gets two for the challenger. A big shoulder block gets the same for MVP but he misses a running boot in the corner. MVP grabs three straight quick near falls but gets caught in a small package for the pin to keep the title on Miz.

Rating: D+. If there was a reason for this to be on PPV other than the show was running short, I don’t know what it was. Miz didn’t look like anything special out there but somehow he would be world champion a year later. MVP on the other hand would be out of the WWE but he did well enough in Japan. Nothing to see here other than a filler match.

Post match MVP hits the Playmaker on Miz and gets booed LOUDLY. He lost completely clean so the booing is deserved.

Show and Jericho, the former tag team champions, run into each other. Show accuses him of being jealous of the chemistry Show and Miz have but Jericho brushes it off. He calls the crowd gelatinous worms before pointing out all of the similarities he and Miz have. Show says he’ll throw both Miz and Jericho out to win the Rumble. R-Truth pops up and says he’ll do the same. Show leaves Jericho standing there much to Jericho’s chagrin.

DiBiase wishes Orton luck and says he’s got Randy’s back. Orton asks where Cody is but DiBiase doesn’t know. This was during the time when Legacy was about to die and both members were trying to get on Randy’s best side. DiBiase claims that Rhodes only wants to win the Rumble but Orton has heard enough. He doesn’t want anyone’s help and gets a clear face pop in response.

The National Guard is here.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Sheamus won the title in a shocker last month at TLC and is heel here. He’s also still not that good and wouldn’t really hit his stride for about a year and a half. They stare at each other to start and my goodness is Sheamus pale. A dropkick puts the champion down but he comes right back with a running ax handle. Sheamus gets in a shot to the arm and we head to the floor where said arm is sent into the steps.

Back in and Orton goes for the knee and things slow down a bit. Orton wouldn’t really pick up the pace of his offense until about the following year which made his matches pretty hard to sit through. Sheamus comes back by sending Orton’s shoulder into the post twice and hitting some shoulder blocks in the corner. That gets him nowhere though as Orton takes out the knee again and knocks Sheamus to the floor.

They head inside again and yet AGAIN momentum shifts back to Sheamus as he hits a DDT on the arm for two. Off to an armbar for a bit before they slug it out to the boo/yay chants. Orton wins the slugout but walks into the Irish Curse for two. The High Cross is escaped and Orton kicks Sheamus in the head to send him to the outside. Orton gets ready for the RKO but Rhodes jumps the guardrail and blasts Sheamus in the back before running away. The referee sees it though and despite Orton hitting the RKO, he’s disqualified and Sheamus keeps the title. Lame ending to a pretty lame match.

Rating: D+. Like I said, Sheamus just wasn’t very good yet. He was still this big imposing brawler who pounded on people and that’s about it. There was indeed a story in the match but it wasn’t a very entertaining one as they just kept beating on each other’s limbs but when there’s no difference because of the beating, the story doesn’t work. The ending didn’t help either but it did set up something in the future.

Post match Orton snaps on Cody as DiBiase comes down to save his partner. While Orton yells at Cody in the corner, Sheamus comes back in and lays out Randy with a Brogue Kick.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool. This was an awkward feud as Mickie won the title shot in a triple threat and then Laycool made fun of Mickie for being fat. This is of course odd as Mickie is a professional athlete and gorgeous and would only be called fat by a crazy person. It’s also pretty disturbing when you consider how WWE pushes the Divas as role models. The final bit of it was a segment where Mickie got beaten down and covered in food.

Women’s Title: Michelle McCool vs. Mickie James

Pre match Michelle runs her mouth about how fat Mickie is and accuses her of skipping out on the match. Michelle offers cake and here’s Layla in a Mickie Pig costume. The real Mickie sprints to the ring and hits a Thesz Press on Layla on the floor. She heads inside, sends Michelle into Layla and hits the MickieDT for the pin and the title in 20 seconds.

Post match the other Divas bring out a cake and smash it into Laycool’s faces.

We recap Mysterio vs. Undertaker. Rey won the shot by slamming a cage door onto Batista’s head to escape because that’s what heroes do. Taker said he’ll show no mercy on Mysterio so Rey uses the same line everyone does on Taker: he isn’t afraid. Batista beat up Mysterio as well, claiming that Undertaker and the world title was his.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Undertaker

Mysterio, in the deep south, comes out wearing a white hood. Striker talks about Lawler being in the ring with Kamala and Lord Humongous (Sid) because he thinks it makes him sound interesting. He’s trying to make a comparison to being in the ring with Undertaker, but if he was as smart as he thinks he is, he would ask Jerry what it’s like to be in the ring with Undertaker himself, which would save a lot of headaches.

Rey fires off some shots in the corner before Taker grabs him by the neck and throws him up and over the top and out to the floor. That looked awesome. Back to the apron and Rey fires off strikes to the face, only to get punched right back down to the floor by a single shot. Taker misses the legdrop on the apron but hits it the second time before heading back in. Rey counters a chokeslam into the 619 but Taker easily grabs the legs. Tombstone is countered and Taker misses an elbow drop.

Rey tries a springboard cross body but jumps into a boot to the chest. We head to the floor again and there’s another big boot to the head to take Rey down. A third big boot keeps Rey down but the fourth misses and Taker sends his leg around the post. Rey hits a baseball slide to send the leg into said post and Taker is in trouble. The seated senton off the apron is caught and Taker puts him back on the apron, only to be caught by an Asai Moonsault to put both guys down.

Taker grabs Rey by the throat and slams him into the barricade. The champion’s nose is busted a bit. Taker does that lifting wristlock of his to crank on the arm a bit before punching Rey down in the corner for a bit. A big side slam gets two for the guy who would use a side slam in this match as Striker goes into this big speech about how the blood shows that undertaker is mortal. Seriously, it’s a BLOODY NOSE. Watch the freaking Lesnar match in the Cell when the blood is literally dripping from Taker’s head and down onto Lesnar’s body.

Rey starts firing off some punches but a single shot from Taker is enough to put him back down. A jawbreaker finally staggers the big man and they do a kind of cross body, although Taker counters into something like Langston’s Big Ending, so it’s hard to say which hurt worse. Taker sits up so Rey kicks him in the face. Why has no one done that before? Rey drops the dime (springboard legdrop) for two but Taker kills him with a big clothesline. The Last Ride is countered and the 619 hits as does a second one, but the West Coast Pop is countered into the Last Ride to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was solid stuff for the most part for a few reasons. First of all, they didn’t make Taker look ridiculous to get into position for Rey’s moves. That’s my biggest issue with most of Rey’s battles against giants: how stupid the big men look. The other good thing here is that Taker wasn’t knocked silly after just a few moves. Rey only hit maybe a dozen offensive moves here other than basic strikes and it wouldn’t have made sense to have Taker in major trouble. Finally, Rey can bump like crazy when he’s trying to. The only issues here are the lack of a threat to Taker and Striker’s commentary. Chill out already man.

Shawn is watching in the back when Kane comes in and says Shawn’s obsession with Taker is unhealthy. This is KANE calling something unhealthy. He warns Shawn to cool it with Taker because it won’t end well. Kane leaves and HHH comes in. Shawn apologizes for whatever happened on Raw which apparently isn’t important enough to specify. HHH agrees Shawn vs. Taker is meant to be, but it won’t be by wining the Rumble.

Rumble by the Numbers time:

23 Winners

627 entrants eliminated

36 eliminations by Austin

11 eliminations by Kane in 2001

2002 was the last Rumble in Atlanta

62:12 Rey was in the Rumble in 2006

2 seconds was the record for 20 years until Santino broke it last year

3 wins for Austin

2 win for #1, the same as #30

70% of the winners win at Mania

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is #1 and Evan Bourne is #2. Bourne snaps off a headscissors to start and follows up with a spinwheel kick to take Dolph down. Ziggler comes back with the Zig Zag but can’t throw Evan out. Bourne decks Ziggler and hits Air Bourne as CM Punk of the Straightedge Society is #3. He slams the other two guys’ heads together and dumps them out one after the other. Punk gets a mic and says that tonight is the greatest night in the history of the Straightedge Society. These two are just the first of 29 men who will challenge him, but they can be saved.

The clock starts running down, so Punk gives us the line of the night: “Excuse me, it’s clobberin time.” JTG is #4 and after a few clotheslines, he poses like an idiot in the corner and gets dumped. Punk gets the mic again and says that not everyone can be saved because they don’t have his dedication. Great Khali is #5 and Punk immediately says he can make Khali greater by saving him. He asks Khali to raise his hand for the Straightedge Pledge but Khali lowers the hand onto Punk’s head for the chop.

There’s the Khali Vice and in less than 90 seconds, Beth Phoenix of all people is #6. She stares down Khali and gets picked up and placed on the apron. Beth kisses Khali but in the process pulls him over the top to eliminate him. Phoenix gets back in and BEATS UP PUNK, only to get caught in a GTS to the chest. Would that really knock her out? Before she’s dumped out, here’s Zack Ryder at #7.

As Ryder gets in, Punk grabs the mic and says Zack has potential. PREACH IT BROTHER! Punk starts offering him a spot but his Ryder with the mic before he gets done with it. The fans are going nuts for Punk now and there goes Ryder. Punk talks about how great he is and wants to know who is next, but whoever it is, they’re inferior to Punk. In at #8 is HHH as we enter the second segment of the Rumble.

They stare each other down and HHH starts punching. The facebuster has Punk staggered and a spinebuster puts him down as Drew McIntyre is #9. That gives us a tag champion in HHH and the IC Champion in Drew at the moment. HHH is looking a bit flabby here. He hits the high knee on McIntyre and escapes the GTS to eliminate Punk. DiBiase is #10 as we’re flying through this.

HHH gets double teamed down in the corner until John Morrison, the guy that lost the title to McIntyre, is #11. He takes both heels down and pounds away on them before hitting a jumping DDT on Drew. Starship Pain almost completely misses Drew and HHH clotheslines John down. Kane is #12 and comes in with the top rope clothesline to HHH. There’s a double chokeslam to McIntyre and Morrison before Kane tries to dump DiBiase.

Rhodes is #13 and saves Ted as he comes in. Morrison is sent to the apron and springboards back in, only to get dropkicked out of the air. Legacy goes after Kane but HHH saves him for no apparent reason. Cody saves himself from being eliminated and MVP is #14. Miz runs up behind him though and blasts MVP with the US Title. Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on McIntyre to break up the Future Shock on Kane. HHH is in trouble in the corner and MVP is carried to the back.

Carlito is #15 and the ring is starting to get full. There’s a Backstabber to HHH and one for Drew and Ted as well. Miz is #16 and hits a quick Finale on Carlito. Cue MVP to clothesline Miz out and eliminate himself in the process. Matt Hardy is #17 and lasts about 20 seconds before Kane puts him out. HHH immediately dumps Kane too and the ring is a lot more empty all of a sudden.

HHH starts laying out everyone and Shawn is #18. Carlito is backdropped out, Rhodes and DiBiase are tossed, Morrison gets dumped, and DX puts out McIntyre to get us down to DX. Before anything can happen though, Cena is #19 to get us to the final third of the match. Cena cleans house and hits a double Shuffle before getting caught in the Pedigree. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks HHH out to pop the crowd BIG.

Shelton Benjamin in that stupid gold period is #20. He hits Paydirt on both guys but gets dumped by Cena in less than 50 seconds. Yoshi Tatsu is #21 and doesn’t even make it 30 seconds. Big Show is #22 and Cena is shaken. Big Show RUNS down to the ring and house is cleaned. Shawn and Cena try to eliminate each other but Show pulls Shawn back in for some reason. What’s up with that tonight?

Mark Henry is #23 and we get a quick battle of the giant. Who would think those two would have a world title feud a year and a half later and be REALLY popular? Henry slams Show and falls on Cena as he tries an AA. Show spears Henry down and Chris Masters is #24. Masters tries the Masterlock on Show and gets dumped for his efforts. Now Henry goes after Show but Shawn breaks it up for some reason. R-Truth is #25 and actually dumps BOTH big guys. There’s something you wouldn’t expect.

Truth hits a Stroke on Cena and Jack Swagger is #26. All three guys get Vader Bombs and Swagger goes old school with a very slow Oklahoma Stampede. Jack knocks Michaels to the apron but can’t get the elimination. Kingston is #27 and cleans house on Swagger, hitting the Boom Drop and dumping him out with a nice leverage move. Truth puts Kofi on the apron but gets pulled out by a reverse headscissors.

Jericho is #28 but after cleaning about half the house, Cena grabs an AA to put him down. Shawn adds the top rope elbow and tunes up the band but Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise to take him out. Cena dumps Kofi but walks into a Codebreaker. Everyone is down and EDGE makes his big return at #29. That’s rather brilliant instead of waiting for the big surprise at #30, we get a SWERVE that actually makes sense.

Everyone gets a spear and Jericho is out. Edge is back about six months early and it’s Edge-O-Matics all around. Batista is #30, giving us a final four of Shawn, Cena, Edge and Batista. Not bad at all. It’s power all around but Edge spears him down. Everyone is down now Shawn gets up first and hits the forearm on Cena followed by the nipup.

Shawn slams every American in sight and drops the top rope elbow on Cena. Batista takes one too as Edge is still down in the corner. Sweet Chin Music hits Cena and there’s one for Batista as well. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and Michaels superkicks Edge back in, only to get knocked out by Batista. The crowd gasps HUGE at that and Shawn is about to cry. Shawn gets back in and superkicks the referee to vent some frustration. Shawn FINALLY leaves and Cena escapes the Batista Bomb before dumping Batista out. Edge misses the spear but throws out Cena a second later to go to Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. This is kind of a hard one to grade. They definitely followed the three act structure which helped a lot and the match was VERY fast paced. I mean, the longest anyone was in there was Cena and he barely broke 20 minutes. The problem with that is it doesn’t give anything time to develop. The main story was Shawn which is fine and he would get to Mania at the end of the day anyway. It’s a really fun Rumble but not one of the best ever.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is very solid and the rest has nothing terrible so we’ll call it a good show overall. Things would get a lot more interesting soon after this with the rise of the Nexus and a very solid Wrestlemania. This was also a time of transition for the company as a lot of the guys in this show would be gone by the end of the year. Anyway good show here and worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Miz vs. MVP

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D+

Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

Dang I liked Sheamus a lot more than I thought I did.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/29/royal-rumble-count-up-2010-one-of-the-best-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: August 17, 2007
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

The reign of the Great Khali continues as we are nine days away from Summerslam. I’m curious to see where they are going with the rest of the card, but Khali has already massacred Batista with the Claw. With the main event set, we could use some build for a few more of the matches. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is MVP for the first episode of his VIP Lounge talk show. MVP talks about being better than you and challenging Matt Hardy to face him in a boxing match at Madison Square Garden on Saturday Night’s Main Event. However, MVP has to back out due to his heart condition, but he has a replacement: the only four time World Heavyweight Champion, Evander Holyfield.

This brings out Matt Hardy as the show’s first guest, with Matt talking about how he has beaten MVP in arm wrestling and a wrestling match, but now MVP is running again. MVP again brings up his heart condition but Matt says it’s the lack of a heart. Matt is fine with fighting Holyfield, but MVP has a challenge for him tonight.

That would be the Masterlock Challenge, with Chris Masters and a referee coming out. Before we get started, Matt punches Masters in the face but the hold is finally put on. MVP does commentary as Matt starts blacking out and then gets in the ring to kick Matt down to cut off the comeback. The villains go to leave but come back in for the Playmaker and trash talk to Matt.

We recap Vince McMahon finding out that he has an illegitimate child on the roster.

Vince is here, in a peach colored jacket, with Coach, who has been put in charge of checking the roster to find out who Vince’s child might be. The ECW roster has been checked off the list, save for Big Daddy V. Vince thinks it’s a possibility, but wants everyone here tonight checked too.

Jesse and Festus with they could be Vince’s son. Well Jesse does, while Festus (who Jesse thinks looks like Vince) stares a lot.

Deuce N Domino vs. Major Brothers

Non-title. Domino shrugs off a wristlock to start so it’s off to Brian for some more success on the arm. There’s a double flapjack to Domino but it’s quickly off to Deuce to take over on Brett. The chinlock with a knee in the back makes it worse, setting up Domino’s neckbreaker for two. A suplex finally gets Brett out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Brian to clean house. Brian hits a spinebuster for two but misses a high crossbody. Deuce cracks him in the mouth for the pin.

Rating: C. I’m not sure if there is a tag team division at the moment but it’s nice to see another team getting the chance to crack into the title picture. Deuce N Domino have no one to fight for the belts at the moment so why not see what the Majors can do in the spot? It’s not like there is anyone else at the moment so work with what you have.

Vince McMahon and Coach are in Teddy Long’s office to offer best wishes on Teddy and Kristal’s wedding. Great Khali and Runjin Singh come in to yell about having to face Kane tonight. Teddy says get over it but Vince isn’t sure about Khali’s parentage. He seems to like the idea though and did have that one time in India.

Chuck Palumbo still likes motorcycles.

We recap Kane and Finlay attacking each other last week.

Finlay vs. Jamie Noble

Finlay powers him into the corner to start and then does it again, only to have Noble slug away. Noble manages to knock him outside but Finlay is right back in to work on the leg. A slam sends Noble’s leg into the ropes and the half crab goes on. An Indian Deathlock makes it worse….and here is Kane to go after Finlay for the DQ.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but it was good while it lasted. Noble was little more than a comedy guy at the moment but he was able to have a good match with just about anyone. That being said, this was all about setting up Finlay vs. Kane, likely for Summerslam, and that should be a good fight.

Post match the brawl is on but here is Hornswoggle to shove Noble into Kane’s bad ribs. Kane chokeslams Noble and Finlay escapes.

Rey Mysterio is coming back at Summerslam.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Shannon Moore

Chavo still has the Rey Mysterio mask from last week. Moore gets taken down to start and charges into an elbow in the corner. A running headscissors sends Chavo outside but he is ready for the dive, instead suplexing Moore into the post. Back in and a stretch muffler keeps Moore in trouble but he pops out and is fine enough to hit a Whisper in the Wind. The Gory Bomb is countered into a sunset flip for two, only to have Chavo come back with a brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. What the heck was that? I don’t know what Shannon was going for here but Chavo worked on the knee for a bit and Moore hopped up to hit a big flip off the top. I can forgive a bit of no selling but what’s the point of Chavo posting the leg and then working on it if that’s the reaction he is going to get? Not a good match, and that’s because of Moore in this case.

Post match Chavo puts the mask on Moore and gives him a frog splash to the knee.

Here is Batista for a chat. He admits that he is a little grouchy but he has had all week to stew about what happened. Last week, Great Khali crushed Ric Flair’s skull and treated him like a piece of dirt. That freak wrapped those hands around his head like a vice grip and that has never happened to Batista before. Right here and right now, he is promising himself and Flair that….and never mind as here is Khali on screen to interrupt.

Khali demonstrates what is coming for Batista at Summerslam by popping a basketball. Batista goes on a rant about how basketballs don’t hold grudges, which makes it sound like he is feuding with the ball. A ticked off Batista is a good thing but I’m not sure how well the title match is going to go.

Vince McMahon and Coach keep going over the idea of Vince being Khali’s dad, but Coach thinks Batista might have gotten his great physique from McMahon too. Vince seems to improve….and here is Big Dick Johnson dressed as a baby for some dancing. With Vince turning his back, Coach starts dancing too because he’s a goof at heart.

Mark Henry vs. Greg Cardona

Cardona goes for a waistlock to start and gets tossed down in a hurry. Henry throws him to the floor with no trouble and then stands on his head back inside. A backbreaker sets up a World’s Strongest Slam and a bearhug to give Henry the squash win. Cardona is better known as Trent Beretta, but I wonder if he was borrowing the future Zack Ryder’s real last name.

Post match Henry goes on a rant about Undertaker’s druid coming out last week and suggesting that Undertaker was coming back. We see another clip of Henry wrecking Undertaker and, just like last week, the feed is hacked to hint that Undertaker is coming back at Unforgiven. Then the gong goes off and there is a small pile of sand in the aisle. Henry picks it up, lets it fall through his fingers, and that’s it.

Torrie Wilson and Michelle McCool are going to be the bridesmaids in the wedding. Victoria comes in and is really glad that she’ll be one too, but that isn’t happening. Victoria slaps Michelle, who slaps Kenny Dykstra instead. Teddy Long makes the match for tonight.

Jimmy Wang Yang and Funaki come up to Vince McMahon to suggest they are his son. Vince says he wasn’t in Japan long, but here is Kane to laugh and call Vince dad.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria

Kenny Dykstra is here too. Victoria yells at her to start and gets thrown to the floor for her efforts. Back in and Victoria takes her down without much trouble and rips at Michelle’s face. The top wristlock keeps Michelle in trouble as commentary talks about a bunch of celebrities weddings. Michelle comes back with some armdrags and kicks Victoria down, setting up a middle rope clothesline for the pin.

Rating: D+. The division continues to be in a weird place as they have these random setups for a match every week and then get about five minutes at most. You can only get so far on something like that and I think we’re at that point now. I’m not sure what they can do without more wrestlers or something to fight over, but that needs to be figured out.

HHH is coming back at Summerslam.

Summerslam rundown.

Vince McMahon and Coach are about to leave but here is Howard Finkel of all people to suggest he might be the son. Vince shoves him away.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Non-title, Runjin Singh is here with Khali and Kane has bad ribs. Khali goes after the ribs to start but gets knocked outside where Kane can hit an uppercut. Back in and Khali knocks him out of the air, allowing him to hammer on the ribs again. We hit a rib claw, but since that’s just putting a hand on his ribs, Kane is able to fight up and pound away in the corner. The chokeslam is countered with the Claw though and Kane finally goes down for the pin.

Rating: D. I know he can only do so much, but Khali rubbing the side of Kane’s stomach for a good chunk of the match is not exactly thrilling television. The Claw vs. choke deal at the end was just about the only thing they needed to do here but it was a rough way to get there. Khali is showing how limited he is here and that is making it hard to watch.

Post match here is Finlay to go after Kane again but Batista runs in to go after Khali. Finlay gets speared down again but Khali head vices Batista out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were good and bad parts here, with Vince getting to interact with a bunch of people and that is always going to work. The rest of the show was up and down at best, with some of the matches being little better than dreadful. The good thing is that Summerslam is mostly set, but the idea of Batista vs. Khali in a big match has the potential to be a train wreck. Smackdown has been trending down since Khali won the title and that is making this show rougher every week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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Smackdown
Date: August 10, 2007
Location: Chevrolet Center, Youngstown, Ohio
Attendance: 3,700
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re closing in on Summerslam and the main event is set, with Batista challenging Great Khali for the World Title. That may be a problem for Batista, as Khali debuted a Claw hold, which could cause quite the damage. The rest of the card could use some attention though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. Domino

They’re starting fast this week and Deuce and Cherry are here with Domino. Batista knees him in the ribs as the smoke from Batista’s pyro is still filling the arena. A suplex gives Batista two but it’s too early for the Batista Bomb. Back up Cherry’s distraction does absolutely nothing as Batista takes Deuce N Domino out with ease. The spear into the Batista Bomb is good for the easy pin. On Domino.

Rating: C-. Total squash and that’s what it should have been. It would have been nice to not see a champion lose this way, but it isn’t like there are any other tag teams worth beating up around here. Batista didn’t break a sweat here and that made for an entertaining enough destruction.

Post match Deuce tries to jump Batista and gets wrecked as well. Great Khali pops up on screen to yell at Batista, who won’t be celebrating at Summerslam. We see a clip of Khali Clawing Ric Flair last week to knock him out.

Here is the returning Rey Mysterio, whose knee surgery must have been a success as he is about four inches taller now. Whoever it is seems to be a big Chavo Guerrero fan because he doesn’t know if Rey can beat Chavo at Summerslam. Or if he can even face Chavo, because Chavo is that amazing. He gets on his knees to beg Chavo to avoid that kind of a beating again but here is Eugene to interrupt.

Eugene vs. “Rey Mysterio”

The fans think Chavo sucks and it’s a headscissors to take Eugene down to start. The 619 misses and believe it or not, it’s Chavo under the mask. Eugene is so offended by the deception that he starts hammering away and hits a Gory Bomb, followed by Three Amigos. The frog splash takes too long though and Chavo moves, allowing him to hit his own for the pin.

Rating: D+. They didn’t bother trying to take this one too far as there is only so much you can get out of this kind of a match. It was also a match where the copying moves made sense, but Eugene is so far beyond meaning anything that it is hard to believe that he was kind of a big thing at one point. Chavo is on his way to the big showdown with Rey and that should work out well for both of them.

Kenny Dykstra kisses Victoria as she is getting her makeup done when Michelle McCool comes in to tell them to get a room. Violence is teased.

Raw Rebound.

Mark Henry vs. Sterling Keenan

Keenan is better known as Corey Graves. Bearhug finishes for Henry in about a minute.

Post match Henry says no one will mess with him because of this, sending us to a video of him attacking Undertaker. As the beating is on, we cut to an Undertaker vignette, with the word “Unforgiven” being heard. Back in the arena, a man in black walks away from the ring and his footprints are rather prominent.

Torrie Wilson vs. Victoria

Jimmy Wang Yang and Kenny Dykstra are here. Victoria jumps her to start and takes it to the floor. That means Yang has to dropkick Dykstra down as Torrie is scared. Back in and the Widow’s Peak finishes Torrie in a hurry.

Post match the beating stays on but Michelle McCool runs in for the save.

We recap Matt Hardy beating MVP in arm wrestling and regular wrestling last week.

Commentary tells us that thanks to the Wellness Policy, MVP found out that he had a heart condition and has had surgery, but will be back in a week.

MVP complains about how his heart was messed up last week but Matt Hardy cheated to beat him anyway. It would usually take someone a year to return but he’ll do it in a week because he is half man and half amazing.

Matt Hardy vs. Finlay

Finlay points a finger in his face to start and they take their time to start. A headlock and shoulder have Matt in early trouble so he grabs a headlock of his own. Commentary talks about Mr. McMahon’s illegitimate child (ok fair enough) as Matt hits Finlay in the face for two. Hold on though as Finlay complains of an eye poke, which naturally is a way to sucker Matt in for some uppercuts.

Back up and Finlay charges into a boot in the corner but manages to send Matt hard to the floor. They fight over a ram into the apron so Matt gets posted as we take a break. We come back with Finlay staying on the arm that went into the post, including kicking away at the shoulder. The cranking begins on the arm but the referee is smart enough to see the feet in the ropes. Good of him for doing his job for once.

Back up and Matt hits an elbow to the face, only to get taken down into another armbar. The arm is slammed onto the apron before Finlay goes with the armbar again. Back up and Finlay forearms away in the corner but Matt slugs him down. The middle rope elbow to the back connects and the Side Effect gets two. Finlay fights back but here is Hornswoggle at ringside. Finlay brings him inside but Jamie Noble comes out to chase Hornswoggle off. Finlay goes to rescue Hornswoggle….and it’s a countout.

Rating: C+. This felt like they had set up a joke for seventeen minutes and then forgot the punchline. They set up everything with Hardy’s arm being banged up and then just let it end in the middle of his comeback? Instead of managing to beat Finlay with one arm, it was like they were saying “close enough, we’re done”. This had me really confused and disappointed, even though the rest of it was rather good.

In the back, Jamie Noble asks Kid Kash and Funaki where Hornswoggle is. Finlay comes in and grabs Noble, telling him to stay away from Hornswoggle. Noble says this is three on one….but Kane pops up behind them and beats up Finlay.

Kane vs. Sylvan

Sylvan rants in French until the fire cuts him off. Kane sends him flying into the corner and hammers away without much trouble. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Sylvan cuts off a charge in the corner. Kane hits a big boot though and the top rope clothesline sets up the chokeslam for the easy win.

Post match Finlay runs in and beats Kane down with the shillelagh.

Teddy Long and Vickie Guerrero talk about Teddy’s wedding and gives him some Viagra as a wedding present.

Here is Chris Masters for the Masterlock Challenge to anyone in the crowd. A rather large fan is goaded into it, but says he has played football, wrestled…..and just got out of prison for manslaughter. With that, Masters picks another fan, who he easily beats. I’m still not sure why this is supposed to be interesting, especially after someone already broke the hold.

Batista tells Ric Flair to be careful against Great Khali, but Flair is mad over being rag dolled last week. He’s felt the Claw from other people before and now it is time for a Figure Four on Khali.

Ric Flair vs. Great Khali

Non-title. Flair chops away to start and is tossed to the ground for his efforts. The nerve hold goes on for a good while, followed by the big chop and a big boot. Flair manages a low blow and chops away, with Khali going down to a knee. Then Khali grabs the Claw to finish Flair without much trouble.

Rating: D. This was as good as Khali nerve holding Flair for about a minute and a half was going to be. The Claw is a fine way for someone with Khali’s hands to go, but you need something other than that. The problem is he can’t do much more and this was a bad example of how limited he really is.

Post match the Claw stays on so Batista runs in for the save. Khali Claws Batista down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I don’t remember the last time Smackdown came up with such a bad show as this was rather awful. There was nothing on here that you would need to see and the best match, between Hardy and Finlay, has one of the more disappointing endings I have heard of in a long time. This didn’t make me want to see Summerslam and it was one of the weakest shows WWE has put on in a long time.

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Smackdown
Date: July 6, 2007
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re on the way to the Great American Bash and that could go in a few different directions after last week. Batista beat Edge but isn’t allowed to challenge for the title. Therefore we are going to need a new challenger, but I’m not sure who that is going to be. Maybe we can have a wacky competition to crown a new #1 contender. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Non-title and before the match, MVP says that the title means he is better than anyone here but Matt’s music cuts him off. They lock up to start with MVP grabbing a headlock to take over. Matt gets sent into the corner and MVP is already looking cocky. A slam drops Matt again and MVP gives him the Ballin pose. Matt flips out of a test of strength and but MVP spins over into a backslide for two.

This time it’s Matt working on a headlock of his own, setting up a bulldog out of the corner. Back up and MVP kicks away at the leg before pulling up the pant leg to get at the brace. We take a break and come back with MVP kicking him in the back and grabbing an armbar. Matt fights out of that in a hurry and hits the middle rope elbow to the back for two more. MVP catches him on the apron though and knocks him into the barricade for the big crash to take over.

We hit the seated abdominal stretch on Matt on the mat, followed by a waistlock to mix it up a bit. Matt gets up again and hits back to back Side Effects for two each but catches him on top with a superplex for two of his own. A fireman’s carry drop bangs up Matt’s ribs even worse and MVP kicks him in the head for another near fall. MVP’s running boot to the chest in the corner gets two but Matt is right back with a Twist of Fate for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. This got some time and Matt continues to be the underrated gem of the roster as he is having one long and pretty good match after another. I liked this one well enough, though some of the ribs work could have been cut out in the middle. I’m not wild on the champ losing twice in a row though, and hopefully that isn’t the start of a trend. It probably is, but hopefully not.

Michelle McCool goes shopping.

Kristal and Teddy Long are discussing wedding plans when Edge comes in. He wants to know what he’s doing tonight so Long says go have the Cutting Edge. Long will even send in the biggest guest the show has ever had.

Chris Masters vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Masters sends him into the corner to start and runs him over without much trouble. A clothesline knocks him silly as JBL says this is what happens when cruiserweights face heavyweights. Yang fights up and kicks away, including a dropkick, but a high crossbody is pulled out of the air. The Masterlock finishes in a hurry.

Post match here is Great Khali, so Masters bails in a hurry. Yang is picked up and chokeslammed without much effort. Through the translator, Khali issues an open challenge for the Great American Bash, promising to destroy more people until someone accepts.

Jesse and Festus are coming to Smackdown. Apparently Festus is a navigational wizard.

Major Brothers vs. Jeremy Young/Mike Fox

Brian cranks on Fox’s arm to start and it’s off to Brett to work on an armbar. A double hiptoss gets two with Young making the save but Brett knocks him off the apron. That leaves Fox to get caught in a Russian legsweep/STO combination for a fast pin. The Majors didn’t look bad here.

Rey Mysterio is coming back.

Finlay vs. Ric Flair

Somehow this is their first singles match ever. They start slowly as we hear about their various bar activities. A hard shoulder puts Flair into the corner but he takes Finlay down by the leg. Back up and Finlay knocks him into the corner before grabbing the nerve hold. Flair fights up and goes with a thumb to the eye, only to get clotheslined back down for two. Now it’s Finlay starting in on the leg, including a half crab into the Celtic Knot.

Flair makes the rope so Finlay hits a Vader Bomb onto the leg to stay on the target. A cannonball down onto the leg is cut off though and Finlay crashes outside. Back in and Flair grabs the Figure Four, sending Finlay to the ropes this time. A belly to back suplex drops Finlay again but here is Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to hit Flair in the knee with the Shillelagh. The Celtic Knot finishes Flair in a hurry.

Rating: C+. These are the kind of guys who could have a good match with each other just due to pure talent so I’m not at all surprised that this worked out. The ending was an easy way for Finlay to cheat and win so Flair gets to save a bit of face. Not exactly a great match, but it was nice to see for the sake of a curiosity.

Victoria interrupts Torrie Wilson’s Summerslam photo shoot and says Torrie isn’t taking over Smackdown like she did on Raw. Torrie calls her crazy and the fight is on.

Great Khali beats up a stagehand, who had been accused of wanting to face him at Great American Bash.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Kenny Dykstra

This is Palumbo’s return after several years away and he has become a biker in his absence. Palumbo sends him into the corner to start but Dykstra is back with a dropkick. Dykstra sends him arm first into the post and a DDT on the arm gets two. We hit the armbar for a bit but Palumbo fights up and hits a slam spun into a Rock Bottom (Full Throttle) for the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here, but what were you expecting from these two? Palumbo as a biker is about as lower card of a gimmick as you can get but he could be fine to fill in some time for a few weeks. Dykstra continues to be someone who is fine as a heel that you want to see get punched in the face and he filled in that role well enough this time too.

Raw Rebound.

Mark Henry is ready to hurt the new wrestlers around here.

Deuce vs. Eugene

What an odd match, though it might have something to do with Domino having a broken nose. Eugene is distracted by Cherry’s skates so Deuce sends him into the corner to start. Deuce stops for a kiss from Cherry so Eugene Hulks Up…and here is Great Khali to beat both guys up.

Post no contest (which should have been a DQ), Khali issues the open challenge again and here is Batista to accept. The staredown is on with Khali leaving.

Rey Mysterio is still coming back. Nothing has changed in the last hour.

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge but he doesn’t know the guest. He would love to tell us about the guest but he can’t do that tonight. Edge is ready to ask the tough questions so here is…..Kane (giving us a great face from Edge, who seems to gulp a bit). Edge: “Like the kids say today, it’s all good.” Edge talks about how Kane debuted in WWE ten years ago this October and brings up Kane introducing the Inferno match.

We hear about See No Evil, but that doesn’t Edge talks about his own accomplishments, which are a bit better than Kane’s. Edge goes to leave but Kane grabs him by the throat, saying he doesn’t like Edge very much. That’s enough for Edge, who says he’ll never be in the ring with Kane again. Cue Teddy Long to say not so fast, because Edge is defending the World Title against Kane at the Great American Bash. It might not be the biggest match in the world, but Kane is as good as anyone else available at the moment.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a nice show with some good action and the main event set for the pay per view. They still need some bigger names around here and hopefully the returning Mysterio can help in that area. The stars they have are good enough at the moment, but they don’t have much of a bench and that could become a problem in a hurry. For now though, they had a pretty good show, even with Deuce vs. Eugene getting the final match slot.

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Smackdown
Date: June 22, 2007
Location: Bobcats Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Vengeance: Night Of Champions and the card is set. It isn’t a show that needs a lot of setup, so it’s a good thing that we have one of the biggest storylines in years to help pad things out. Other than that, we likely have Batista/Ric Flair vs. MVP/Edge. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open fast with the Cutting Edge, with Edge saying he had Vince McMahon’s final interview on this very show. There will be a special tribute to Vince on Raw, even if Vince made him face Batista in a Last Chance match at Vengeance. For now though, let’s bring out someone brand new to the show, and someone you wouldn’t expect as a suspect: Torrie Wilson.

Torrie isn’t sure what Edge is talking about, but Edge accuses her of being scored by Vince and put into a match with Carlito. Edge sees one liar in the ring but here is MVP to cut them off. MVP doesn’t think Torrie should have to go through this…because she should be going through a lie detector test! Cue Ric Flair to go after both of them but the beatdown is on. Batista runs in for the save, setting up a likely tag team main event.

Post break, Teddy Long and Vickie Guerrero have made the tag match.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore vs. Chavo Guerrero/Jamie Noble

Not this tag match. Noble headscissors Moore down to start and grabs a rather early chinlock. That’s broken up so Noble hits a running shoulder before it’s off to Chavo. A dropkick gives Moore two and it’s off to Yang, who gets a bit of a response (which may be canned but it’s better than nothing). Noble comes back in and gets caught in a jumping hurricanrana, only to stomp Yang down without much trouble.

Chavo comes in and stomps away before it’s right back to Noble to work on the arm. Yang fights up but Chavo avoids a charge to send Yang’s shoulder into the post. That doesn’t stop Yang from hitting a dropkick though and the hot tag brings in Moore. House is cleaned in a hurry and Chavo is dropped face first onto the buckle. Yang hits a big dive onto Noble but Chavo Gory Bombs Moore for the pin.

Rating: C. It’s the least valuable title this side of the Texas Hardcore Title but there is something about putting four high fliers out there and letting them go for a few minutes. Chavo needed the win to get him back on track before the title match so at least there is a bit more set up for Sunday. Now just do something with the title already.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show.

Mark Henry vs. Funaki

Henry throws him around a few times to start as commentary raves over the power. The bearhug goes on and Funaki is out in a hurry.

We see more of the same clips of Vince’s explosion and people talking about it that we’ve seen for a week and a half now.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Teddy Long because she has set up all of the travel for everyone to go to Raw next week. Long is happy but seems to have some special plans for himself and Kristal. Cue Kristal, and Long seems nervous about something he has planned in public tonight, with Kristal joining him in the ring.

Finlay vs. Matt Hardy

They take turns powering the other into the corner to start until Finlay hits him in the face. Matt sweeps the leg and grabs a headlock on the mat so Finlay rips at his face. A belly to back suplex has some more success at getting Finlay out of trouble and we hit the chinlock. That’s eventually broken up and Matt sends him face first into the corner over and over.

They head outside where Finlay is sent into the barricade, which draws out Hornswoggle from under the ring. The distraction lets Finlay run Matt over and we take a break. Back with Finlay pulling him down by the hair and going back to the chinlock. With that broken up, Finlay’s Vader Bomb hits raised boot but Finlay goes after the knee. Some kicks to the knee set up a leglock, followed by a kneeling half crab.

Hardy makes the rope so Finlay takes him outside and drops him knee first onto the steps. Back in and Finlay rips the knee brace off and sits on the leg again. Finlay grabs the leg but gets caught with an enziguri to start the comeback. The Side Effect gives Matt two and he manages the middle rope elbow to the back. Hornswoggle offers a distraction but Matt shrugs off the Shillelagh shot and hits the Twist of Fate for the pin.

Rating: B-. This got some serious time and it’s a good sign to see Matt pick up this kind of a win. Matt fought through an injury and interference to win clean. That’s the kind of a win that can help build someone up and it came over someone with enough credibility. It helps to have people like this who can eat up a lot of time and have a rather effective match and they did so here.

We look at Stephanie McMahon’s appearance on Raw, where she remembered her dad and swore vengeance for whoever blew him up.

Here are Teddy Long and Kristal for a chat in the ring. Long says he didn’t know what it meant to be happy before he met her. He has a question for her and proposes, but she starts crying and walks away without saying anything.

Chris Masters vs. Danny Shanley

We get a Masterlock highlight reel before the match, which is pretty much all of Masters’ career. Shanley can’t Irish whip him to start so Masters hits a hard clothesline. Masters snaps him throat first across the top and starts pulling on Shanley’s head. A slam plants Shanley again and we hit the neck crank. Masters switches up to the Masterlock for the easy win.

Rating: D. Yeah it was a squash and yeah it played to Masters’ strengths, but it was the same Masters that we have seen since he debuted. That’s why his career stalled: he looked great and had a good full nelson, but what else did he have? There was little more than a physique and eventually you need something more than that to have a successful career.

In Memory of Sherri Martel. How nice of them to get to this almost three fourths of the way through the show.

Teddy Long finds Kristal in the back and she’s still in tears. He apologizes and she puts the ring on to accept. Well that was anti-climatic.

We run down the Vengeance card.

We get a press conference from the lead investigator in the Vince McMahon case. They have found DNA from Vince, the limo driver and one more well known (and unnamed) personality. This apparently warranted a full press conference (minus press).

Michelle McCool…plays tennis? She gets to take her aggression out on tennis balls and wear these cute outfits (her words). Not their most subtle work here.

Ric Flair/Batista vs. MVP/Edge

Flair gets the big hometown entrance, which is rather well received, and Little Naitch gets to hold the ropes for him. Edge’s pyro leaves the arena a bit smoky to start so Flair chops him in the corner for lowering the air quality. JBL says you don’t want to wrestle someone in their hometown, showing that JBL has no idea how WWE works. Flair cranks on the arm so it’s off to Batista, who gets to run over MVP.

With MVP down, Flair comes in to drop the elbow for two and it’s right back to Batista. MVP kicks Batista in the face and gets plowed over for his efforts as we take a break. Back with Edge stomping on Batista and grabbing a waistlock. MVP’s crossface forearms get two but Batista catches him in the swinging Boss Man Slam. The tag brings in Flair (POP) and house is cleaned, only to have Edge come in with a quick spear to cut him down. Batista makes the save and it’s Flair getting stomped this time.

MVP grabs a seated abdominal stretch but Flair fights up and hits a chop. JBL: “That’s like getting hit with a frying pan.” How many times has he been hit with a frying pan? MVP kicks Flair in the head to cut him off and Edge comes back in to talk a lot of trash. A backdrop gets two as Batista is pacing on the apron. MVP misses a big running boot in the corner though and Flair goes for the leg, allowing the hot tag to Batista. Everything breaks down and Batista counters Edge’s spear into a spinebuster. The Batista Bomb finishes Edge off.

Rating: B. This was good and egads it was nice to not see the hometown star get crushed to end a show. Flair didn’t need to get the fall here because having him get to celebrate to end the show was more than enough. Batista gets some momentum before the title match and Flair gets to pose. That’s how this should have gone and it was a good match too.

Overall Rating: B. Rather strong show here, with the only thing close to bad being a Chris Masters squash. Other than that, it was a pair of good, long matches and a way to make me want to see both Vengeance and Monday’s big show. I liked this one a lot and it’s one of the better TV shows WWE has had in a long time. Nice job.

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Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

This is one of those shows where there’s a little bit of something good and a little bit of something bad. First the bad: there’s Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali. The good though is Batista vs. the Undertaker inside the Cell, which almost has to be almost has to be good. Other than that the card looks fine and we’ve got Shawn in a world title match which is almost guaranteed to be at least decent. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how this started twenty years ago, as you would expect it to. It also talks about the main event matches tonight, as you would expect it to as well.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz

Punk is defending and Miz and Morrison are tag champions. The tag champions of course jump at the same time because one on one, neither have a chance to beat Punk. Punk kicks the tar out of Miz’s head and gets a quick two on Morrison. Both tag champions are sent to the floor where Punk takes both of them out with a suicide dive. Back in and Punk gets caught in a double suplex after the springboard clothesline fails.

Miz and Morrison double team Punk but Miz is the first of the heels to go extra heel, dumping Morrison out to the floor. He hooks a chinlock on Punk but has to let go to knock Morrison back to the outside. Punk kicks Miz in the head but Morrison comes back in with a backbreaker to the champ (as in the ECW Champ) followed by a cobra clutch (called a Japanese sleeper by Joey Styles because he likes to sound smarter than he actually is).

Miz pulls Punk to the floor and rams him into the concrete to get us down to the tag champions fighting. Morrison sends him into the corner chest first and hits the yet to be named Starship Pain for two. Punk comes back in and ranas Morrison off the top into a powerbomb from Miz in a SWEET looking move. That only gets two but it got a BIG reaction from the crowd.

With Morrison pretty much dead, Punk kicks Miz in the face for two and hits the knee/bulldog combo for the same. Punk hits a backbreaker on Miz but Morrison grabs a rollup and trunks on the champ for two. Morrison escapes the GTS but gets knocked to the floor, allowing Punk to hit the GTS on Miz for the pin to retain.

Rating: C. Other than that rana/powerbomb spot, this was only ok. Punk had to carry the whole thing, but you could see something special in Miz. It’s a little easier to see it now, but a buddy of mine said that he thought Miz would be the bigger deal because of this match. I’m not sure if I’d agree based on this match, but Miz did indeed look better than Morrison here. This was a pretty good choice for an opener, but the execution wasn’t great because Punk didn’t have enough to work with.

We recap MVP turning on Matt Hardy and taking out his knee. They had been partners for awhile before this but everyone thought MVP was evil the whole time, and this was the not very shocking turn.

MVP says that Matt won’t be competing tonight because he needs crutches to get by. That doesn’t surprise MVP, because Matt has always needed a crutch, be it either Jeff or MVP. Oh and he’s better than Matt.

Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla

One fall to a finish here and Beth is Women’s Champion. The Divas Title doesn’t exist yet which is how things should have stayed. Layla is WAY hotter being evil and Melina has some gorgeous hair. She also falls off the apron during her splits entrance which is worth a chuckle. The second attempt works and thankfully she’s smiling after screwing it up. Mickie and Maria are ridiculously good looking as well.

Victoria and Michelle start things off with Michelle taking over with a headlock. A big boot puts Victoria (Tara in TNA if you’re new at this) down and it’s off to Torrie who can’t wrestle a watchable match to save her life. Victoria kills her mostly dead with a side slam and it’s off to Layla who is so bad here that she can’t even beat up torrie. Kelly and Jillian come in and Jillian tries to scream a bit, only to get rolled up for two. Maria comes in, basically wearing a bikini.

Thankfully Beth comes in to flatten Maria before handing it right back to Layla. Actually make that Melina, who misses a charge at Maria and crotches herself, allowing for the hot tag to Mickie. James beats up everyone in sight, has her partners take out Beth, and hits the Long Kiss Goodnight on Melina for the pin. What’s the Long Kiss Goodnight you ask? That would be every 13 year old’s dream: Mickie literally bends Melina back and kisses her before kicking her in the head for the pin.

Rating: D. Yes, the match sucked. Yes, most of the women in this are horrible wrestlers. Yes, if you’re complaining about these things, you’re missing the point. This was pure fan service as you had ten girls in either tight or barely there outfits and one hot woman kissing another hot woman before kicking her in the head. If you’re looking for a wrestling match here, you’re in the wrong place.

Coach and Regal are in the back looking smug. Hornswoggle, who is Vince’s son at this point, is pacing very nervously. Remember that he faces Khali tonight.

Orton says history isn’t going to be made tonight. He’s going to beat Shawn because if Shawn uses the superkick, Shawn loses the match.

Shawn is here for revenge tonight because Orton has tried to hurt him and take his livelihood. Therefore tonight, Shawn is going to take the title.

Raw Tag Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Cade and Murdoch are defending. Rhodes is brand new at this point and spent weeks getting beaten up by Holly before Holly respected him enough to team with him. Cody and Cade start things off with the rookie getting hiptossed down. The crowd pretty much died as soon as the bell rang, which should tell you about the tag team situation at the time as these are the best Raw had for their belts.

Off to the very redneck Trevor Murdoch who chops away but gets caught in a headlock. Yeah Cody didn’t quite get anywhere as a worker for awhile. Holly comes in and is immediately beaten down by Cade. The crowd is reacting a bit so it’s not totally dead but it’s nothing special. The heels are sent into each other and fall out to the floor as Holly takes over. We actually get a HOLLY chant for the only time I can ever remember.

A rollup gets two for Hardcore and it’s off to Murdoch via a blind tag. Holly gets his head kicked off and things slow back down again. The champs tag in and out a lot before Cade picks up Murdoch to drop him down with a legdrop for two. We hit the chinlock on Holly which goes nowhere so Holly suplexes Trevor down. Cade misses an elbow drop but Holly still can’t tag out.

Cade tries that dropping Murdoch into a legdrop move again but as almost always is the case, it doesn’t work this time. Warm tag brings in Cody who hits a missile dropkick on Lance for two. Holly and Cade fall to the floor and Murdoch hits the stupid cousin of a Canadian Destroyer (much more like a sunset flip than a piledriver) to retain.

Rating: C-. Another so-so match here but at the end of the day, it’s Hardcore Holly and a rookie Cody Rhodes vs. Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch. That’s only going to take you so far as the fans aren’t going to care about it for the most part. I don’t get why they didn’t change the titles here as Holly and Rhodes would get the belts in a month (and hold them for SIX MONTHS) anyway.

The announcers explain the concept of a Survivor Series match to the uninitiated. That’s something you hardly ever see anymore: a basic explanation of WHAT IS GOING ON. Sometimes you need to slow things down a bit and tell people what’s going on. If you’re flipping through the channels and see something flashy like wrestling, you’re likely to stop but if you have no idea what’s going on, you’re not likely to stay. Gorilla Monsoon was a master at doing this.

Team HHH isn’t worried about being down 5-4 coming into the match (Matt was hurt remember) but Kane says he isn’t an underdog. We recap the Katie Vick angle (HHH: “Uh…..yeah sorry about that.) and Jeff reminds HHH that he put him in the hospital. HHH is sorry about that too and says tonight they can unite in the idea of doing something terrible to someone else.

Team HHH vs. Team Umaga

HHH, Kane, Jeff Hardy, Rey Mysterio

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, MVP, Finlay, Big Daddy V

Kennedy’s mic doesn’t work for the live intro at first so we can only hear the ending. Jeff is IC Champion and MVP is US Champion. Remember that we’re starting at 5-4 because Matt is gone. Rey and Kennedy get things going with Kennedy using a rare power advantage to take over. Kennedy pounds in the corner but gets caught in a sunset bomb before it’s off to Jeff for a BIG pop. Rey and Jeff combine for some Poetry in Motion and Kennedy is in trouble.

Scratch that trouble as Jeff runs into an elbow (JBL: “That’ll knock the purple out of your hair!”) and it’s off to MVP. MVP limps a bit which apparently is a fake injury or something. Or maybe he’s making fun of Matt Hardy. I never cared for MVP so I really don’t care. Off to the 550lb Big Daddy V who uses his big fat man offense on Jeff, before stupidly throwing Jeff to the corner for a tag to Kane.

V almost immediately belly to belly suplexes Kane down for two but Kane comes back with some clotheslines in the corner. A top rope clothesline puts V down again but Kane has to chokeslam Finlay. V hits a Samoan Drop and a big elbow on Kane for the upset (yeah it’s an upset) elimination. HHH comes in and hits the facebuster on the monster but gets caught by a clothesline to shift the momentum right back.

We get the match that everyone is looking forward to in HHH vs. Umaga and the fans don’t react at all. Umaga takes the Game down with a belly to belly of his own and a headbutt has HHH in trouble. Umaga misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Rey. Rey pounds away but almost immediately gets knocked down by the other monster. Mysterio goes after the leg but a rana is just a bad idea. Actually it is as he swings Umaga into the 619, followed by a springboard seated senton for two. Umaga is like BIG SAMOAN SCREAM and hits a spinning release Rock Bottom and the Spike to eliminate Rey.

So it’s all five villains vs. Jeff and HHH, and it’s not that the two superheroes are likely to run through all five and win or anything like that of course. Jeff vs. Kennedy starts things off and Hardy is in trouble quickly. I don’t think Jeff really gets going until he looks like he’s been thrown out of a building though. Jeff comes back with a dropkick but the slingshot dropkick in the corner misses due to an MVP assist. Cole talks about how that’s the second time MVP has caused that move to miss in three days. JBL: “Maybe MVP is just smarter than the Hardys.” I love it when JBL cuts Cole off at the knees. No one does it better.

Off to MVP who hooks a chinlock on Jeff which goes on for awhile. Jeff fights up but gets gets caught in a fireman’s carry drop. MVP starts talking trash to the fans and walks into a Twist of Fate to make it 4-2. Kennedy is in next and walks into an enziguri, which allows for the tag off to HHH. A high knee sets up a clothesline for two for HHH followed by a spinebsuter. HHH sees the human whale known as Big Daddy V coming and avoids an elbow which crushes Kennedy and allows HHH to make it 3-2.

V gets both superheroes on the floor and crushes Hardy against the post which probably put Jeff on the harder stuff for a few days. What the harder stuff for Jeff is I’m not sure but it has to be illegal. Back in the ring HHH and Hardy avoid a charge in the corner and hit a double DDT on V for the elimination. I’ve always wondered how basic moves when a monster is fresh is enough to eliminate them. These guys have no stamina at all.

It’s HHH/Jeff vs. Finlay/Umaga if you’re keeping track. Finaly comes in and pounds away on HHH while JBL talks about how great Finlay is. Does anyone ever have a bad thing to say about this guy? Here’s something bad to say about him: he does the stupidest looking spot in wrestling where he goes the middle rope and jumps into a boot in a move that is only designed for him to jump into a boot.

Hot tag brings in Jeff for a hard (and appropriate) Irish whip into the corner and the slingshot dropkick for two. Jeff goes to the apron and is immediately drilled by Umaga to give the evil foreigners control again. Finlay whips Jeff into the corner but gets caught by a Whisper in the Wind. A mule kick staggers Umaga and there’s the hot tag to HHH to meet Finlay. The high knee puts Finlay down and there’s a spinebuster to follow it up.

The Pedigree is loaded up but Umaga kicks HHH’s head off (there must be a great surgeon in WWE for all the times that happens) to break it up. The Celtic Cross (White Noise. It’s an Irish thing) is escaped and there’s the Pedigree to make it 2-1. Umaga DESTROYS HHH in the corner but the running attack misses by a mile. Pedigree, Swanton, we’re done.

Rating: B-. The match was pretty fun stuff but once we got down to 5-2, it was a matter of guessing what order the five were going out in rather than who was going to win. That being said, it’s probably the right move as HHH would move on from Umaga after this and take to feud with Orton. That feud would follow Hardy vs. Orton at the Rumble, so this was definitely a launching pad for the two survivors back to the main event.

Buy Smackdown vs. Raw! For some reason when they do the HIAC on the game as you would expect them to, Batista has a Smackdown tag title, a title he hadn’t held in almost two years, instead of the world title he currently held.

Shaquille O’Neal is here.

Hornswoggle is still nervous in the back. Tonight’s match is another of those tough love things from Vince. Speaking of the boss, he comes in and Hornswoggle immediately hugs his leg. This is one of those things that I think WWE missed about Horny: he acts like a child. HE HAS A FULL BEARD! THE GUY IS IN HIS TWENTIES! HORNSWOGGLE IS NOT A CHIL……why am I annoyed by this? It’s Horswoggle. Vince says he made this match because Horny is a McMahon and therefore has to rise to the occasion. He compares this to his battles with Turner and the US government. Vince gives him a pep talk and Horny is ready.

Here’s Shane McMahon to the arena, rocking a suit. Shane introduces Vince and apparently they’ll be in the corner of Horny tonight. Well that’s nice of them. JBL says this is going to be Biblical. Cole: “This isn’t the Bible.” Vince isn’t in his headset either. That’s the natural reaction that Cole has. Why does he get to keep his job for so long?

Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali

Runjin Singh, Khali’s manager, says we should have the wrestlers get together for the reading of the rules. This results in Singh talking over the referee as he translates. The fans want Shaq but they get the bell instead. The fans realize Shaq is here and Vince tells him to sit down. Vince tells the fans he doesn’t care what they want. Now there’s a shoot if there’s ever been one. Horny takes off his jacket and hat and kicks Singh in the face. Horny kicks at the legs of Khali…and wisely runs away. Singh runs his mouth some more and gets GREEN MIST IN THE FACE!

Horny dives on Singh and pounds away before hiding from Khali under the ring. The small guy finds that Irish club and calls Khali in but the stick is of course caught. Khali kicks him down but before the Vice Grip can go on, Finlay runs in for the save and face turn. This ran over three minutes but it doesn’t deserve to be rated. At least this did serve a purpose though, so it’s not a total failure. It should have been on Raw though.

Finlay beats up Singh and Khali with the club. It would eventually be revealed that Finlay was Horny’s father, but I’m not quite sure why Vince agreed to the whole thing in storyline.

Watch this DVD about Taker being 15-0! I guarantee you it won’t be out of date in about six months or so!

Alfonso Soriano, a baseball player, is here.

We recap Shawn vs. Orton. Shawn had the title won in a previous match but Orton intentionally got himself disqualified and then Punted Shawn to the shelf for a few months. Shawn admitted he wanted revenge but Vince banned the superkick for no apparent reason other than being evil.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending, if Orton gets DQ’ed the title changes, Shawn can get no more shots if he loses, and if Shawn attempts to use the Superkick, he loses the match. Got all that? Shawn almost immediately goes to the cravate and Orton spends nearly two minutes trying to fight out of it. Now that’s a (European) headlock. Orton escapes in the corner and Shawn raises his leg for the kick but the referee says that wasn’t an attempt. It’s going to be one of those referees I guess.

Orton drops down as Shawn runs the ropes so Shawn gets on Randy’s back and chokes away. The hold switches to a front facelock as they’re spending a lot of time in holds so far. Randy finally gets to the floor where Shawn fakes diving over the top so he can dropkick him through the ropes before faking ANOTHER dive and hitting an Asai Moonsault in a good sequence. Back in and Orton rolls through a crossbody for two before hitting an uppercut to take over.

Shawn fights up and throws on the required Sharpshooter and Orton finally makes the rope. I know when holds go on I’m not very descriptive, but what is there to say? You know what the hold looks like and it’s really hard to convey the drama of someone crawling to the ropes. Orton comes back with a thumb to the eye and snaps Shawn across the top rope to take over. The Elevated DDT hits for two. I didn’t remember Randy doing that move back then.

It’s off to a chinlock by Orton as the hold marathon continues. It’s not boring or bad but it’s a very different way of going about a match. Shawn fights back but walks into a dropkick for two. Shawn catches another dropkick in mid air and slams Randy down a few times before hitting the top rope elbow for two. By instinct, Shawn tunes up the band but he fakes Orton out by making him duck and grabs a rollup for two. Brilliant psychology there.

In a move I was shocked to see at the time, Shawn puts on a Crossface. Remember that this is just five months after Benoit, so that’s not a move you would have expected to see here. Orton finally gets a leg over the rope and Shawn looks spent from that not working. He tries the hold again but Randy clotheslines his head off for two. Orton hits the backbreaker and loads up the same Punt which kept Shawn out for five months.

Randy gets a running start but Shawn grabs an ankle lock with a grapevine to make Orton scream. Orton uses the good leg to kick Shawn away and break the hold. Why don’t more people do that to angle? Michaels tries the Figure Four but Orton kicks him into the post. Shawn pulls up the foot for the kick but since he has to stop, Orton hits the RKO for the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. I was digging the psychology here as Shawn had to come up with all kinds of ways to beat Orton instead of the RKO. It says a lot about Shawn that the only way they could have Orton be able to hang in a fight with him was to take away Shawn’s big move. Orton would hold the title for another five months or so until HHH (of course) took it away from him.

Orton demands that Shawn say Orton is the future but Shawn is pretty out of it. There’s the superkick we were waiting on.

Cole is talking about the main event and SAVE US. For those of you unfamiliar, this was a series of videos that popped up at random on shows with what looked like the Matrix announcing that someone was coming to SAVE US. It would be revealed tomorrow night that it was the return of Chris Jericho.

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker. Batista lost the belt to Undertaker at Wrestlemania and they feuded for the title on a few PPVs. After a cage match on Smackdown, Edge cashed in the MITB contract and won the title from Undertaker. Later, Edge was hurt and had to vacate the belt, which was won by Khali. Batista eventually beat Khali for the belt and Taker came back to challenge him for it.

They fought at Cyber Sunday with Batista winning, which made them 1-1 with a few draws. Taker wanted one more match and Batista was perfectly cool with that, but Taker wanted it in the Cell. See how that worked? It was a natural progression with the Cell being the FINAL match between them (one on one at least). That’s a logical progression that you rarely get anymore. This was an excellent feud which won Feud of the Year from Meltzer. I can’t argue with that at all as it was great.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Big Dave is defending. Taker charges to start and is caught in a headlock before getting run over by Big Dave. Taker shrugs it off and tries an early chokeslam but Batista fights out of it. This is one of those feuds where you don’t bother with the basic stuff and go with the big power moves because that’s all that’s going to have any effect. Taker clotheslines him down and pounds away in the corner. We’re still in the early going here so this doesn’t mean a lot yet.

The Snake Eyes and Big Boot get two for Taker and it’s chair time. Batista hits a BIG spear to take Undertaker down and gets the chair. That goes badly for the champ as Taker kicks the chair back into his face and gets two off a clothesline. They head outside and Taker keeps control with a solid shot into the steps. Batista gets raked against the Cell and there’s the legdrop on the apron.

To stay on the throat, Taker puts the chair over Batista’s throat and slams the bottom of the chair into the steps. The champ is bleeding from the mouth now. Back in and Taker covers by driving a forearm into the throat. Taker is kind of the heel in this match I think, which says A LOT about how over Batista was here. Back in Taker loads up Old School but Batista catches him in the spinebuster in a cool counter.

They slug it out and Batista takes over with a clothesline that gets two. Batista hits a powerslam and takes it back to the floor. They’ve done a solid job here of having both guys dominate for a long stretch which usually works well for a big time match. Taker whips Batista into the Cell to take over again so maybe what I just said is nonsense. Batista gets rammed head first into the Cell and things are starting to pick up.

A chair shot keeps Batista down and the champ is cut open on the forehead. Batista blocks Old School again and hits a superplex to put both guys down. As Big Dave is crawling over to Taker, the Dead Man tries the Hell’s Gate (triangle choke) but it’s not on full. Batista makes the rope and heads to the floor for a breather. Has Batista never watched a big time Taker match? He deserves the Taker Dive that he gets.

Taker picks up the steps and tries to ram Batista with them, but Batista pulls himself up using the cage and kicks them back into Taker’s face. Batista picks up the steps and just rams Taker in the head with them four or five times, busting the Dead Man open. Back in and Batista does the stupid thing of punching Taker in the corner and gets a Last Ride for his efforts. That only gets two and the pop isn’t huge from the crowd. They know we’re getting A LOT of finishers before a pin here.

There’s a chokeslam but it only gets two. The Tombstone is countered into a spinebuster for two and there’s another spinebuster for good measure. It’s table time and Batista easily powerbombs him through it….for two. There’s the pop from the crowd on the kickout that we were looking for. Now the Animal loads up the steps but Taker backdrops him onto said steps for two. The Tombstone hits….for two. If my memory is right, Batista and Shawn are the only two people to take all three of Taker’s finishers and kick out of all three. Batista might have done it more than once but I’m not sure.

Taker KILLS Batista with a Tombstone on the steps but at two, someone pulls the referee out of the ring. It’s the returning Edge, who I presume was hiding under the ring. He steals a camera and clocks Taker with it before hitting a Conchairto on the steps. Batista has no idea this is going on after the Tombstone. Edge pulls the champ on top and the pin is pretty much academic.

Rating: B+. This was very good but it never quite got to that level that they were hoping for it to I don’t think. The problem is this was match was based on respect instead of hatred which takes a lot out of a match like this. Edge would win the title in a triple threat next month and eventually lose it to Taker at Wrestlemania.

After the Cell is raised, Edge beats on Taker some more to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a nice surprise. The tag title match is some uninspired stuff but other than that (ignoring the non-match between Khali and Horny) there’s nothing bad on here at all. The Divas match is what it is and if the worst thing I have to do is look at Kelly Kelly and Maria in barely there shorts for five minutes, I’ve got a good show on my hands. The big matches delivered and the other matches aren’t bad so this is a solid show all around and worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz

Original: B-

Redo: C

Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla

Original: D

Redo: D

Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Original: D

Redo: C-

Team HHH vs. Team Umaga

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: D+

Redo: B

Batista vs. Undertaker

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

The main thing I’ve learned about myself from these redos is that I was a lot looser with my grades back then. The redo grades here are a lot more toned down and it’s a bit harder to please me now.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/16/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2007-batista-vs-undertaker-in-the-cell/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: June 1, 2007
Location: John Labatt Centre, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the last Smackdown before One Night Stand but we also have to finish the build to Saturday Night’s Main Event, because the one thing that WWE needed at this point is more content. Last week saw Batista become the #1 contender again, meaning he gets a shot at Edge and the World Title in a cage on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chris Benoit/Matt Hardy vs. MVP/The Miz

The graphic says Mike Mizanin but commentary calls him the Miz. Benoit and MVP lock up to start with MVP getting pummeled into the corner. It’s off to Hardy for a back elbow and elbow drop for two so Miz comes in to get beaten up as well. A backbreaker gives Benoit two, followed by a snap suplex for the same. Miz sends Benoit into the corner though and rams him head first into the mat for two.

The Mizard of Oz gets two on Benoit, who suplexes his way out of trouble again. That’s enough for the tag to Hardy, who pulls Miz out of the corner into a sitout powerbomb for two of his own. Everything breaks down and the villains are cleared out as we take a break. Back with Miz hammering away and cutting off Matt’s comeback with a clothesline. MVP’s cheap shot from the apron keeps Matt in trouble and it’s time for a nerve hold to keep things slow.

The running boot to the face in the corner gets two more on Matt as the beating is on in full. Miz snaps Matt’s throat across the middle rope for two and the chinlock goes on. MVP comes back in but Matt finally gets up an elbow in the corner, setting up the running bulldog. The hot tag brings in Benoit to clean house but Miz kicks off the Sharpshooter attempt. That’s fine with Benoit, who settles for the Crossface and the tap as Matt dives onto MVP.

Rating: C+. This got some time and it makes a lot of sense to put Miz in there with some talented people. Miz needs ring time and a way to get built up, with a match like this working rather well. It’s a good sign that he was able to hold up his part of the match, as the new, serious version is working much faster than I would have expected.

Finlay gives Hornswoggle a pep talk for his match with Little Boogeyman, because that’s a thing.

Jillian Hall vs. Michelle McCool

Feeling out process to start with Michelle flipping out of an early headscissors. Michelle grabs a cradle, which is in no way a reason for her to twist and contort. Jillian sends her outside and chokes away inside as the fans are not exactly interested. We hit the backbreaker for a bit before Michelle comes back with a belly to belly for two. Jillian takes her down and hits the front flip legdrop for three near falls but here is Ashley Massaro for a distraction. That’s enough for Michelle to grab a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for the pin.

Rating: D+. This is a case where you have to consider the particulars. It wasn’t a very good match, but it felt like a match. They were doing actual moves and looking fairly competent at them, which is a lot better than a series of hair pulls and brawling. You can see the women coming a long way and that’s rather impressive.

Boogeyman fires up Little Boogeyman.

Little Boogeyman vs. Hornswoggle

Boogeyman is here too. JBL: “Koko B. Ware would look like Andre the Giant in this match.” Little Boogeyman spits worms into Hornswoggle’s hat to start and then knocks Hornswoggle down. The gyrating elbow gets two and it’s time to throw worms at Hornswoggle. That’s fine with Hornswoggle, who spits mist back at Little Boogeyman.

Cue Finlay from underneath the ring to throw Little Boogeyman back inside, setting up a brawl with Boogeyman. Hornswoggle dives off the apron to hammer on Boogeyman for a weird visual, leaving Finlay to Shillelagh Little Boogeyman. Hornswoggle debuts the Tadpole Splash for the pin to end a surprisingly wild match.

Mark Henry is going to hurt Kane tonight.

Raw Rebound.

Kane vs. Mark Henry

Kane kicks him to the floor so Henry comes back in for the drive into the corner. The clubbing forearms into the running powerslam plants Kane and there’s the running splash in the corner. Henry misses a splash though and Kane drops an elbow into a legdrop for two. Kane scores with the top rope clothesline but Henry bails to the floor at the threat of a chokeslam. That’s fine with Kane, who dropkicks him through the ropes, only to get caught in a bearhug. Henry drives him hard into the post and that’s enough for the countout.

Rating: C-. This was a way to keep Henry strong while also protecting Kane for a future rematch so they covered two ideas at once. Henry is being built up as a major force on Smackdown and a big win over Kane would go a long way to get him there. This was the first step on that path so not a bad start, even if the match wasn’t great.

Post match Kane sits up and chases Henry off.

Edge isn’t scared of Batista and is ready for him on the Cutting Edge later tonight.

Deuce N Domino aren’t worried about the Draft because they aren’t going into the army and getting buzzcuts. The interviewer explains it and the champs aren’t happy.

Tag Team Titles: Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. William Regal/Dave Taylor vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce N Domino are defending. Regal elbows Domino in the face to start and hands it off to Taylor to uppercut Domino down. London comes into headlock Taylor before shifting to the arm, with Kendrick coming in off the top to stay on it. Taylor uppercuts his way to freedom though and it’s off to Deuce via a blind tag. That’s fine with London, who armdrags Deuce down and hands it off to Kendrick in a hurry. Taylor punches him in the face to escape (as you do) but Kendrick crossbodies him over the top for the crash to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Kendrick and Deuce slowing things back down until Kendrick has to try to skin the cat. Domino breaks that up with a kick to the ribs though and the champs take over on Kendrick. Back in and Domino grabs a cobra clutch until Taylor tags himself back in. Kendrick is tossed outside in a crash but Regal is smart enough to throw him back inside to break up the countout.

We hit the chinlock back inside with Kendrick having to put a boot on the ropes for a break. An enziguri finally gives Kendrick a breather but Regal comes back in to wreck him with a half nelson suplex (that landing was nasty). The villains get in a fight of their own though and Kendrick gets over for the tag to London. House is cleaned in a hurry but Cherry hits London with her rollerskate so Domino can steal the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B-. This got time and was enough of a different kind of match to keep things feeling fresh. You don’t see triple threat tag matches very often around here so it was nice to have something different for a change. Deuce N Domino have established themselves as champions, though I’m not sure who they are supposed to face next, as depth isn’t really a priority for the tag division.

One Night Stand rundown, including Mark Henry vs. Kane in a lumberjack match.

Teddy Long congratulates Vickie Guerrero on coming up with the lumberjack match. Kristal is worried about being Drafted to another show, but Long would give up being GM to be with her. Vickie says she would run the show in his honor if he had to leave. She even lets the two of them leave early tonight and volunteers to run the show (all ten minutes left of it) for Teddy. Sure why not.

It’s time for the Cutting Edge and Edge wastes no time in bringing out Batista as his guest. Edge makes it clear that this is not going to get physical but he isn’t scared of Batista. Maybe Batista is the one intimidated….so he takes off his jacket. He’s just a bit hot, but Edge is looking a bit scared.

Batista talks about how Edge stole the title from Undertaker but Edge says he’s the champ. Batista: “Until One Night Stand.” Edge wishes him luck, so Batista does the same and slaps him in the face. Edge says he doesn’t need it so Batista says he does and slaps Edge again. We go back and forth with YES YOU DO/NO I DON’T plus some shoving. Edge says he isn’t scared, but Batista says he should be and punched Edge down to end the show. They’re doing what they can with almost no story here and it’s going as well as can be expected.

Overall Rating: C. This show took a different path from last week in that they were trying to build things up as well as they could while also giving us a good amount of in-ring action. What we got here was entertaining enough, though I’m really looking forward to getting past Sunday and on to something fresh. For now though, it a nice go home show for a not so great looking pay per view.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 28, 2007
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,176
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the start of a big week in WWE as we have the three regular TV shows, plus a special Saturday Night’s Main Event and One Night Stand this weekend. That makes this show week the go home show for Sunday, which doesn’t need a lot more set up but maybe they have something good planned. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

It’s Memorial Day, so we get the tribute to the fallen soldiers, including Taps.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Candice Michelle, Mickie James, Maria, Jillian Hall, Layla, Brooke, Kelly Kelly, Michelle McCool, Kristal, Melina

Non-title and it’s a Bikini Beach Blast battle royal, meaning they’re all in bikinis with water guns and pool toys. Melina gets attacked (with the water guns and pool toys) to start and then the water balloons are brought out. Kelly seems to have to adjust her top as the fans want puppies. Kristal is thrown out (through the ropes, because over the top is too much for this kind of match) and there goes Brooke as we slow down for various “weapon” shots. There goes Maria and it’s time to weakly hit each other with pool noodles. Layla is tossed as Lawler says he can’t stand up at the moment.

McCool pours a bucket of water over Kelly, who seems to like it, and then tosses her out. Melina and Jillian go after Mickie and hit her with a water gun for the elimination. Jillian dumps Candice and we’re down to Jillian, Melina and McCool. The villains put McCool on the mat and stretch her by the limbs but she gets back up and clotheslines them down (JR: “Now that’ll knock the barbecue sauce right off of you!”). McCool throws Jillian out and hits a dropkick, but since Melina can’t fall through the ropes, she drops down and rolls out to give McCool the win.

Rating: D. I get it, but my goodness this stuff is cringe. This match actually got about six minutes so Lawler could lose his mind about a thousand times, which got as annoying as you would imagine. There are obvious reasons to put this stuff on TV but egads it does not exactly hold up well.

Here is Shane McMahon to announce that this is the unofficial start of summer. That put some excitement in the air and that is the case in WWE as well. In two weeks, we will be having the first ever tri-branded WWE Draft, featuring Raw, Smackdown and ECW. Any superstar, champion, legend and even leprechaun can be drafted to any show.

Change is inevitable, save for the case of Vince McMahon. At One Night Stand, Vince is going to beat Bobby Lashley, so tonight Shane is going to do the same, as Lashley teams with John Cena against Shane, Umaga and the Great Khali. Tonight, Lashley is finding out what they call Shane the Money. Dancing ensues.

Hardys/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team/Johnny Nitro/Kenny Dykstra

Nitro and Cade start things off with Cade elbowing him in the face to take over early. It’s off to Matt to take Shelton into the corner so Jeff can come in for the first cover. A dropkick to the back of the seated Benjamin lets Matt come back in for the middle rope elbow as this is one sided so far. Haas comes in for a change and gets thrown into the corner for some elbows from Cade and Murdoch.

As JR suggests that the Hardys, as in the champions, are the real World’s Greatest Tag Team, Haas and Benjamin are sent outside for a huge dive from Murdoch to blow Lawler’s mind (Lawler: “IT WAS LIKE A FLYING COW!”). We take a break and come back with Jeff hitting the Whisper in the Wind to Dykstra but Benjamin gets in a kick to the head to take over. Dykstra hits a heck of a clothesline for two, setting up a backbreaker. Nitro adds a slingshot elbow and Matt has to come in for the save.

Benjamin kicks Jeff in the face for two and we hit the chinlock with a bodyscissors. It’s back to Haas for a belly to belly suplex and a chinlock as we hear that One Night Stand will be all extreme rules matches. Dykstra grabs his own chinlock and bites Jeff in the head for a bonus. That’s enough to get Jeff to jawbreak his way to freedom and the diving tag brings Matt back in. A double DDT (one regular, one reverse) plants Nitro and Dykstra as everything breaks down. The Twist of Fate into the Swanton finishes Dykstra as Lawler can’t believe Cade and Murdoch didn’t turn on the Hardys.

Rating: B-. This was one of those matches that helps move things forward while keeping things fresh. You have so many people in the match that you can have a few pairings you don’t usually get while also solidifying Cade and Murdoch’s face turn (or at least what feels like one for the time being). Good stuff here, which shouldn’t be a surprise given the talent involved.

Post match Benjamin says the Hardys didn’t pin he and Haas, so the challenge is on for One Night Stand. Matt says it’s on, and we’ll make it a ladder match, because of course they will.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

John Cena reiterates that he is not scared of the Great Khali and would say…..some weird noises to the Punjabi Frankenstein. That’s translated to Cena still not being afraid but he is neither deaf nor invincible. While he isn’t scared, he isn’t sure if he can do the impossible. Yes he made Khali tap, but there was doubt over whether he won or lost.

You can throw out the submissions at One Night Stand because Cena is going to have to put Great Khali on his shoulders and throw him down for the three seconds. Cena isn’t sure if he can do that but he takes great pride in silencing his critics. At One Night Stand, Cena can and he will. This was classic Cena, as he mocked Khali at first, then told the story of the match and brought the fired up promo.

Santino Marella is excited for the Draft and Maria laughs at his accent, which yes, is Italian. He asks if Maria is ok from the battle royal and they seem interested in each other. With Santino gone, Randy Orton pops up to talk about Rob Van Dam. It seems that Van Dam is not happy with Orton injuring Shawn Michaels, but that was one of the highlights of Orton’s career. He felt bad about injuring Shawn, but he won’t about hurting Van Dam.

Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

They go with the grappling to start as Orton grabs a headlock and blocks a top wristlock attempt. An armdrag frustrates Orton and Van Dam uses his legs to grab a rollup for two. A monkey flip sends Orton flying and there’s a kick to the head. They head outside with Orton getting the better of a slugout, setting up the big dropkick off the top and into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Orton working on the chinlock. Orton pulls him down by the hair to cut off a comeback attempt and it’s time for the circle stomp. Another chinlock is broken up again and Van Dam hits the springboard kick to the face for the double knockdown. Van Dam is up first and kicks him down again, setting up Rolling Thunder.

Orton’s poke to the eye just earns him a step over kick to the face but Van Dam is a little shaky as he goes up top. Van Dam kicks him off the apron but comes back in with the hanging DDT for two. The referee stops to check on Van Dam, who can’t get up to his feet and looks gone. The Punt connects and the referee calls the match as Van Dam is out of it.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of violent Orton that can make for some good stuff as he can be absolutely lethal when he is given the chance. Taking out Michaels and Van Dam in short succession is pretty impressive and should set him up for something else later. Having Van Dam’s facials make it seem like he had been hit in the head with a boulder made this even better.

Post match Orton hits the RKO to make it worse.

Ric Flair/Torrie Wilson vs. Carlito/Victoria

Leave it to Flair to wind up with Torrie out of the whole thing. Flair takes Carlito into the corner to start the chopping but it’s off to Victoria to slap Flair in the face. Lawler: “Lay it on her! She wants it!” Flair takes her down and tries the Figure Four, with Carlito having to make the save. It’s back to Carlito to stomp away at the head and leg, setting up the half crab. Victoria hits Carlito by mistake though and Torrie gets to come in and take over. An X Factor gets two with Carlito making the save. Carlito comes in, kisses Torrie, and hits the Backstabber for the pin (JR: “I KNOW IT’S LEGAL BUT I DON’T LIKE IT!”).

Rating: D+. This feud is running out of gas in a hurry as Carlito has yet to make me believe he is a real threat to Flair. They have fought each other a few times now and it has yet to be anything better than just ok. Both guys need to move on already, as Flair can find something better to do and Carlito can find a good haircut.

Shane McMahon has to break up an argument between Great Khali and Umaga. Shane: “Worst prom couple ever.” He tells them to take out John Cena and Bobby Lashley, but make sure he gets the pin.

One Night Stand/Saturday Night’s Main Event rundowns, edited off of Peacock due to Puddle of Mud.

It’s time for the Kiss Cam with Maria but Chris Masters interrupts. He wants Santino Marella to take the Masterlock Challenge. Masters threatens Maria so cue Marella for the brawl, which ends in the Masterlock. This has been a very Maria frequent show.

Shane McMahon/Umaga/Great Khali vs. John Cena/Bobby Lashley

Umaga sends Cena into the corner to start but misses a charge. Cena scores with the Throwback for a fast two but he gets thrown into the corner to start the hammering. There are the LET’S GO CENA/CENA SUCKS chants as Khali kicks Cena in the head. Shane comes in to stomp away and it’s Umaga getting in some right hands. The Samoan drop gives Umaga a delayed two and Khali drops a leg.

Now Shane is willing to stick around for the bodyscissors and shots to the back of Cena’s head to make things worse. That’s broken up with the ProtoBomb and it’s Lashley coming in to pick up the pace. Lashley runs Umaga over but can’t slam Khali as everything breaks down. The Samoan Spike puts Cena down on the floor and there’s the chokeslam to Lashley. Shane’s top rope elbow hits Lashley for the pin.

Rating: C. Just a quick way to bring in as many people as you can for the main event, which went well enough. Shane getting to gloat works well, as Lashley can shut up either Shane or Vince McMahon to even things up. The match was pretty immaterial, but it isn’t like losing to Umaga and Khali is a big defeat. Lashley didn’t do much until the end but it worked out fine.

Vince McMahon comes out to celebrate with the villains to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It was better than last week but not by much. This did a good enough job of making me want to see the Raw half of One Night Stand, as they are betting on the gimmicks and stipulations to make the show work. That’s about all you can do at this point in the cycle of feuds so at least they’re going with the smartest route possible.

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Smackdown
Date: May 11, 2007
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a big show this time around with the Undertaker defending the World Title against Batista inside a cage. That alone should be enough to carry the show and….well that’s about what it’s going to do as that’s the only major thing set for the show. Unless you could spoilers that is, as WWE has already said what happens this time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at Undertaker vs. Batista and how we got to the cage match. I have a feeling we’re getting a bunch of history tonight.

Opening sequence.

The cage is already around the ring.

Chris Benoit/Matt Hardy vs. Finlay/MVP

They either edited the heck out of something or the cage had a rocket attached to it, as there is no way they raised that thing up so fast. Benoit and Finlay lock up to push each other around the ring to start. It’s already off to MVP to shoulder Benoit down but he has to escape an early Crossface attempt. Matt comes in to drop an elbow and it’s already back to Benoit to stomp away in the corner. Finlay has to break up the cover off a suplex so Matt comes back in for a neckbreaker. Benoit misses a baseball slide to Finlay but clotheslines him down instead. Cue Hornswoggle to….do nothing as we take a break.

Back with Hardy bulldogging Finlay for two and cranking on a headlock. It’s back to MVP to stomp away but Hardy suplexes him for two, with Finlay having to make another save. Matt elbows MVP off the top and actually hits a moonsault, only to bang up his knee in the process. MVP is smart enough to go right after the knee before handing it off to Finlay for a half crab.

That’s broken up but MVP is right there to cut him off again. That lasts all of two seconds though before it’s the hot tag to bring in Benoit to clean house. The rolling German suplexes get two but the Swan Dive misses. MVP comes in, walks into a dragon screw legwhip, and gets jackknife covered to give Benoit the fast pin.

Rating: C+. This was good enough, though MVP losing AGAIN is getting old. It’s ok to let him steal a pin in a tag match but he has to lose there too. It’s one thing to get pinned by Chris Benoit but losing to him over and over takes away a lot from MVP. Not a bad tag match though, which is one thing you can almost always depend on: throwing talented wrestlers out there and giving them time to do something.

Here’s another video on Batista vs. Undertaker.

Next week: Ozzy Osbourne performs the Judgment Day theme song.

Jillian Hall vs. Michelle McCool

Jillian sings a slowed down version of her theme song until Michelle’s entrance cuts her off. Michelle hammers away to start and it’s a catfight with more punching than usual. The reverse chinlock sends Jillian over to the ropes but she is right back with a cartwheel into an elbow. The chinlock has McCool in trouble but she’s back up with an elbow to the face. A jackknife rollup gives McCool two and a belly to belly gets the same. Jillian gets in some elbows in the corner but charges into a backbreaker to give Michelle the pin.

Rating: D+. No it wasn’t good, but you can tell that they are trying to have a good match. There is a world of difference than this and some of the nonsense that you would see out of the Divas division. They need a lot more time and polish, but you can see the effort and some of the basics in there. In other words, Finlay continues to be a wizard with this stuff.

Krystal is rubbing Teddy Long’s shoulders and asks if he has found an assistant yet. He hasn’t found anyone appropriate yet but she has an idea. We’ll have to hear about that later though as two hillbillies from West Virginia come in. They’re here to fight but Teddy says if they can get to Baltimore next week, they can have a match. Long mentions their name as the Dalton Boys as they leave. Krystal goes back to shoulder rubbing and suggests Vickie Guerrero as the assistant. Teddy is skeptical about hiring a Guerrero but Krystal talks him into letting her have an interview next week. That’s good enough for Krystal.

More on Undertaker vs. Batista.

Raw Rebound.

Ashley joins us from Stamford and wants to get back to Smackdown. If nothing else, she wants to get her hands on Jillian and to see Paul London and Brian Kendrick get their Tag Team Titles back.

Domino vs. Paul London

I know I make fun of these teams having a bunch of singles matches but COME ON ALREADY. Deuce, Cherry and Brian Kendrick are at ringside too. London dodges a double leg dive to start but gets shoved away. The referee breaks that up so Domino kicks him in the ribs, only to get dropkicked down.

London scores with a moonsault to the floor (which he missed to cost his team the titles a few weeks ago), only to get snapmared back inside. Domino grabs a cobra clutch but London is back up with a cradle for two. A headscissors into a basement dropkick connects and a snap spinwheel kick drops Domino again. Deuce tries to offer a distraction so London hits the dropsault onto Domino for the pin.

Rating: C. Not too bad here, but e pluribus gads I’m sick of seeing this match. It’s been done to death at this point and I don’t see any reason to want to watch it again. Hopefully we get to the title rematch so Deuce N Domino can retain and move on to ANYTHING else. These teams have fine matches, but the interest has been depleted after seeing some combination of it so many times.

Another Undertaker vs. Batista video.

Snitsky video.

Kane vs. Dave Taylor

Boogeyman, Little Boogeyman and William Regal are here too. Kane appears to be a mixture of happy and confused by the Boogeymen. They start fast with Kane hitting a hard slam as commentary is busy freaking out about the people at ringside. Taylor gets a boot up in the corner and hammers away until Kane kicks him down. Regal trips Kane and feigns innocence in a way that feels so appropriate for him. Kane is back up with the sidewalk slam and the top rope clothesline as Boogeyman and Regal get in a fight on the floor. The chokeslam finishes Taylor.

Rating: C-. About what you would expect here and that was fine enough. Kane and Boogeyman are growing on me as the freaky tag team as it’s a bit of a different direction for both of them. If nothing else, seeing Regal and Taylor being disturbed by what they’re looking at every week has been great. Not a good match, but another part of an entertaining story.

Undertaker beat Batista at Wrestlemania.

The Condemned.

Undertaker and Batista went to a draw in a Last Man Standing match at Backlash.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending in a cage with pinfall, submission or escape to win. Batista has a bad leg and Undertaker has a bad arm to slow both of them down a bit. They go to the slugout to start until Undertaker kicks him in the face. A clothesline gives Batista two but a shot to the bad leg breaks up the Batista Bomb. Undertaker gets knocked down and it’s a top rope shoulder to give Batista two.

We take a break and come back with Batista breaking up an escape attempt but getting hit in the face for his efforts. Batista takes him down and hammers away before a low blow drops Undertaker again. The shoulders and clothesline in the corner let Batista climb but Undertaker hits him in the leg for a crotching. The running big boot knocks Batista into the cage but Batista kicks him down as well as we take a break.

Back again with Batista blasting him with a clothesline for two. Undertaker hits some clotheslines of his own and it’s Snake Eyes into the big boot. There’s the chokeslam for a close two but Batista sends him into the cage. We take another break and come back with the busted open Undertaker walking into a spinebuster for two.

Batista, apparently having never watched an Undertaker match, hammers away in the corner and gets Last Rided for two. Undertaker can’t quite get out of the door so they both go up top for a slugout. Batista knocks him down and climbs up but Undertaker is right there to meet him. They both climb down and drop to the floor….at the same time.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a fight and as usual between these two, it felt like a war with the question being who could survive, let alone win. These two have some great chemistry together and it was on display again here. They feel like each others’ equals and given that they have had more draws than decisive wins in their rivalry, it feels that way in the ring too.

The referees go over to the monitors to look and the feet hit the ground at the same time so the match is officially a draw, with the Undertaker retaining the title. The cage is raised…and here is Mark Henry to jump Undertaker. Henry sends him into the post and crushes him with the splash inside. That’s quite the bad situation for Undertaker and now it’s about to get worse.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is challenging via Money in the Bank cash in. The bell rings and Edge covers for two but Undertaker can’t sit up. He pulls himself up on the ropes and it’s the spear to give Edge the pin and the title.

Post match Edge hits him with the briefcase and poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The cage match alone is worth the watch and the rest of the show continues its hot streak. That’s going to be it for the Undertaker for a long time though as the arm injury was a torn bicep, putting him out of action for several months. That leaves Batista to carry the show again, and now he’ll be able to feud with Edge for the time being. Solid show here, but it feels like the start of a new era, which might not be so great.

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Smackdown
Date: April 27, 2007
Location: Earl’s Court, London, England
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re overseas for the go home show for Backlash and that has all the makings for a pretty dull show. I’m sure the big names will be around, but how much are they actually going to do in this situation? This doesn’t feel like a spot for a bunch of top level stuff, though I would have said something similar for this week’s Raw. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open in the back with Batista beating up Mr. Kennedy. A rake to the eyes gives Kennedy a quick breather until someone who might have been Finlay makes the save, taking the cameraman out in the process. Batista and Finlay brawl into the arena until Kennedy comes in to go after Batista’s taped up thigh. Then the gong hits and the lights go out, with Undertaker appearing in the ring. Batista turns to yell at the villains and Undertaker disappears.

Post break Mr. Kennedy and Finlay want to see Undertaker vs. Batista tonight but Teddy Long puts them in the tag match instead. Let’s make that No DQ too. You would think the bad guys would learn one day.

Kane/Boogeyman vs. Dave Taylor/William Regal

Kane unloads on Regal in the corner and it’s still weird to hear the fans cheering for Regal for once. Taylor comes in and gets choked in the corner as well so it’s back to Regal to actually punch Kane down. As JBL wonders how Boogeyman gets through customs, Kane hits a side slam into the top rope clothesline for two on Regal. Taylor gets knocked outside and we take a break.

Back with Taylor taking over on Regal’s arm and grabbing a crossface chickenwing. It’s back to Regal to hammer away some more as JBL is still going on about the customs. Kane belly to bellies his way to freedom but Taylor cuts him off again. There’s a double suplex to keep Kane in trouble but Taylor misses a middle rope spinning crossbody. Everything breaks down and Kane kicks Regal into a chokebomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here other than the freak show appeal, which is perfectly fine for a one off team. Despite commentary hyping up the idea that Kane and Boogeyman could go after the Tag Team Titles, it doesn’t feel like anything more than a quick one off match to blow off Kane vs. Regal/Taylor for good.

Post match Regal and Taylor bail from the threat of worms.

The Condemned opens today. Now get it onto DVD and then out of people’s minds so we can get away from it for good.

Deuce vs. Brian Kendrick

Domino, Cherry and Paul London are here too. Kendrick avoids some shots to the face to start and grabs a headlock. The headlock takeover lets Kendrick grind away a bit but Deuce fights up and puts on a headlock of his own. That’s broken up and Kendrick dropkicks him into the corner, only to get taken down again.

An elbow drop gives Deuce two and he punches Kendrick in the face to break up a sunset flip attempt. The double arm crank goes on but Kendrick is back up with a headscissors into an enziguri. Sliced Bread connects but Cherry offers a distraction, allowing Domino to go after the injured London. Deuce kicks Kendrick in the face for the pin.

Rating: C. Basic tag match here as it is clear that London and Kendrick’s time is over. They held the titles for the better part of ever so it is time to let someone else do something for the time being. There is nothing wrong with that either, as it isn’t like there is anyone else to challenge for the titles at the moment.

We look back at the opening brawl to set up tonight’s main event.

Deuce and Domino don’t feel like answering questions so they make like a banana and split.

Here is MVP with another of his international challenges. This week, he is facing two champions, both of whom are better than Chris Benoit. First up is a guy like Braveheart: the Scottish Champion, Hamlet Macbeth!

MVP vs. Hamlet Macbeth

Non-title and Macbeth (What bloody man is that?) has Braveheart face paint and a kilt to go with what looks like a bad fitting white sweater. MVP elbows and clotheslines him down to start the stomping. A neckbreaker lets MVP stomp away (as he makes assurance double sure) but the comeback is on, even as Macbeth loses his wig (this is a sorry sight). MVP takes his head off with a clothesline and hits the running boot in the corner, knocking him silly with one fell swoop. The Playmaker wraps Macbeth up, and what’s done cannot be undone. Hopefully he can bear a charmed life.

Post match MVP wants his second competitor, but gets a surprise challenger.

Chris Benoit vs. MVP

Non-title. Benoit suplexes him down for an early two and sends MVP hard into the corner. The charge hits boots though and MVP kicks him outside as we take a break. We come back with Benoit fighting out of a chinlock but getting knocked right back down. A suplex gives Benoit two and the chinlock goes on.

Back up and Benoit snaps off a German suplex into the Crossface, sending MVP straight to the rope. A superplex gets some delayed near falls and the Sharpshooter goes on, with MVP going to the rope again. Another Crossface sets up a third rope break so Benoit rolls some German suplexes. MVP rolls outside before the headbutt can launch though and takes the countout.

Rating: C+. It was intense while it lasted and MVP walking out makes the most sense. There is no need for him to get banged up when he has a title match coming up in two days so why take the beating here? MVP should win the title on Sunday as there is little for him to do if he doesn’t finally step up.

Teddy Long and Kristal are kissing in his office and declare their love for each other. They would love to spend some more time with each other so maybe Teddy could find someone to help him with his work around here. Kristal seems to approve.

Mark Henry is still on his way back.

Jillian Hall comes out to sing a song for the newly single Prince William until someone cuts her off (edited off of Peacock).

Jillian Hall vs. Michelle McCool

Some hair takedowns have Michelle in trouble to start but a cartwheel splash hits raised knees. Michelle slugs away and gets in an elbow to the face, setting up a Russian legsweep ala Brad Armstrong. Not that it mattes as Jillian hits an X Factor for the fast pin.

Post match Jillian goes to sing again but Michelle beats her up.

Backlash rundown.

Mr. Kennedy/Finlay vs. Batista/Undertaker

No DQ. Before the match, Kennedy talks about being a REAL American, where they play REAL football. Undertaker and Batista jump them before the bell and we start fast. Batista knees away at Finlay in the corner before it’s off to Undertaker and Kennedy. Undertaker actually gets caught in the corner so Kennedy can hammer away, only to get clotheslined down for two. Batista comes back in and catches Finlay on top before clearing the ring as we take a break.

Back with Batista hammering on Kennedy and handing it off to Undertaker. Old School is broken up but Undertaker is right back up with a boot to the face. Back to back Old Schools connect for two and Batista sends Finlay into the steps. Undertaker throws Kennedy outside and hits the big boot to the side of the head. Finlay gets thrown over the announcers’ table and we lose Cole for a bit.

Back in and Batista gets to beat up Kennedy, who eventually goes after the leg. The Shillelagh to the knee takes Batista down again and Undertaker is content to let Batista get beaten up. A spear gives Batista a breather but Finlay makes the save. Undertaker gets knocked off the apron and that’s enough to bring him back inside to clean house. Chokeslams plant both villains but Batista comes back in for the spinebuster to finish Kennedy, much to Undertaker’s annoyance.

Rating: C+. This was just a way to have Undertaker and Batista in the same ring before Backlash, with Undertaker being pleased at Batista’s pain. Kennedy and Finlay could have been any two good enough heels to fill in these spots and it would have worked out fine, so it isn’t like there is much to complain about.

Post match Batista says no one keeps him down for ten and he’s taking his title back. Undertaker says he’s coming for Batista’s soul to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. For a two hour commercial for half of Backlash, this worked out pretty well. You shouldn’t have been expecting much from this show and while what we got was good enough, it isn’t like there is anything worth seeing. Backlash has been ready to go for a few weeks now and this was about not screwing up on the way there. Good enough show, but just get us to the pay per view already.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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