Survivor Series 2009
Date: November 22, 2009
Location: Verizon Center, Washington, D.C.
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

Team Miz vs. Team Morrison

The Miz, Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger

John Morrison, Matt Hardy, Evan Bourne, Shelton Benjamin, Finlay

Off to Matt vs. Drew as things slow down a bit. They send each other into opposite corners with Matt taking over via a neckbreaker and the yelling legdrop for two. Another neckbreaker puts McIntyre down but Matt goes up and misses a moonsault press. A second Future Shock (called a Kobashi DDT by Striker) gets a second elimination for Drew, leaving us with Morrison vs. Sheamus/Miz/McIntyre.

Rey Mysterio vs. Batista

We recap Team Kofi vs. Team Orton. Orton was all evil and psycho so Kofi stood up to him. This resulted in what looked to be one of the best face pushes in a long time, as Kofi showed some AWESOME emotion and looking like a serious threat to take Orton down. He destroyed an Orton racecar and then got in a BIG brawl with Orton all over Madison Square Garden, culminating in hitting a Boom Drop through a table.

Team Randy Orton vs. Team Kofi Kingston

Kofi Kingston, MVP, Mark Henry, R-Truth, Christian

Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, CM Punk, William Regal

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho vs. Big Show

Jericho misses a charge and Taker pounds away on Show before clotheslining him down. Show heads to the floor and Jericho gets beaten up for awhile but the big bald guy pulls the champ to the floor. Taker is all cool with that though and posts Show before getting crotched when attempting Old School on Jericho. Chris superplexes him down but Taker gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Jericho counters the counter and puts on the Walls, but Show breaks it up with a chokeslam.

The survivors of Team Miz (Miz, McIntyre and Sheamus) brag a bit. They all claim to be the future.

Team Mickie James vs. Team Michelle McCool

Michelle McCool, Layla, Beth Phoenix, Jillian Hall, Alicia Fox

Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Melina, Gail Kim, Eve Torres

Batista liked hurting Rey.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena

Cena signs some autographs for National Guard members to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Team Miz vs. Team Morrison

Original: B

Redo: C+

Batista vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Team Kingston vs. Team Orton

Original: B+

Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho vs. Big Show

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Team Mickie James vs. Team Michelle McCool

Original: D

Redo: D-

John Cena vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: C+

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/18/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2009-the-pg-powers-explode/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

It is pretty rare when you have a true one match card but that is what we have here, as Batista is defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker inside the Cell. There might be a few other things going on here, but that has been treated as the be all and end all of the show, as it should be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Survivor Series before we move on to this year’s preview.

ECW World Title: Miz vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and for the sake of sanity, I’ll only refer to him as champion. It’s a brawl to start with Punk getting double teamed down into the corner. Morrison catapults Punk into the corner but he comes out with a middle rope crossbody. Punk knocks Miz to the floor but the springboard clothesline is broken up to put Punk down again. Miz breaks up Punk’s springboard with a shot to the floor though and it’s a camel clutch to Punk.

That means Morrison comes in for the save, setting up a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to drop Punk again. A suplex from the apron gets two on Miz but he is right back with a running corner clothesline. Punk is back in with a hurricanrana to send Morrison into Miz for a powerbomb and a near fall. The running knee in the corner sets up the corner bulldog to give Punk two on Miz and a double underhook backbreaker onto the knee gets the same. Morrison is back up to go after Miz, only to be sent outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Miz and retain.

Rating: C+. Miz and Morrison’s rise continues as the two of them have become rather dependable on ECW, and now elsewhere. It makes sense to give them the Tag Team Titles and now we should be seeing even more of them. This was a good way to get the show going as Punk has to work to retain and Miz and Morrison have come far enough that they didn’t seem like cannon fodder.

We look at MVP turning on Matt Hardy, costing the two of them the Tag Team Titles.

MVP says Matt will not be wrestling tonight because he can’t walk. He is tired of being Matt’s latest crutch and he is better than any of his opponents tonight.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson

One fall to a finish rather than elimination rules. Michelle suplexes Victoria to start and then kicks her in the face for two. Torrie comes in and gets swung into the side slam, only to come back with a suplex. It’s off to Jillian vs. Kelly, with the latter grabbing a rollup for two of her own. Phoenix comes in and plants Maria but a missed charge allows the hot tag to James to clean house. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits the Long Kiss Goodnight to finish Melina.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? It was a bunch of the good women vs. the bad women and there is only so much you’re going to get from a match like that. They didn’t have time to do anything and given some of the skill levels of the women involved, that is not a bad idea. The positive sign is that the women are making progress, but a lot of them still aren’t ready to be in a match like this. Leave this thing to Raw.

William Regal and Coach are ready to see Hornswoggle get crushed by Great Khali.

Randy Orton is ready to disappoint everyone and break the Heart Break Kid.

Shawn Michaels wants revenge. And the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Holly and Rhodes are challenging. Rhodes and Cade start things off with Cade grabbing a hiptoss for some early celebrating. A sunset flip gives Cody one and the headlock goes on. That just earns Cody a backbreaker to cut him off so it’s off to Murdoch for a change. Cody takes him into the corner and it’s Holly coming in to forearm away. The hanging kick to the low abdomen has Cade in trouble and the champs need a breather on the floor.

Back in and it’s an atomic drop into a running boot to Holly’s face as Murdoch takes over again. Cade atomic drops Murdoch into a legdrop on Cody for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. Holly suplexes his way out of trouble but Cade is right there with a clothesline. The second atomic drop/legdrop misses though and it’s Cody coming in to very little reaction to clean house. Everything breaks down and Murdoch Code Reds Cody to retain.

Rating: C-. This would have been fine on any given Raw, meaning it was a pretty disappointing pay per view match. Cade and Murdoch are fine as champions and Rhodes and Holly are getting there as a veteran/rookie team, but they aren’t ready for this kind of a match on pay per view. It was far from bad, but this match was sent out there to die and I think WWE knew that was going to happen.

Team HHH, which is down a man due to Matt Hardy’s knee injury, is ready for Team Umaga. Rey Mysterio talks about being an underdog, but that has never been Kane’s thing. Kane brings up the Katie Vick incident (and goes into details). Then Jeff Hardy reminds HHH of the time he put Jeff in the hospital. HHH: “Uh, my bad.” HHH says this is the night when they can come together and do something terrible, so let’s go do it.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

We get a preview of Batista vs. Undertaker with a look at their Cell match in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Why Batista is wearing a Tag Team Title to the ring isn’t clear.

Vince McMahon sits down with Hornswoggle to explain why he made the match with Great Khali for tonight. Some people think that it is because Vince hates him, but it is really because he wants Hornswoggle to rise up like the McMahons do. Vince has been an underdog against Time Warner and the US government and he won. Now go win against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Shane McMahon comes out to introduce Vince McMahon and then Hornswoggle for some family flavor. We even get an old school explanation of the rules as the fans want Shaquille O’Neal (in the front row) to help Hornswoggle, but Vince grabs the mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want. Hornswoggle kicks the knee and then dropkicks Runjin Singh through the ropes. The green mist sets up some right hands but Khali chases Hornswoggle off. The distraction lets Hornswoggle grab the shillelagh but Vince takes it away. Khali loads up the Vice Grip, only to have Finlay come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say about something like this? The match was a segment instead of anything competitive and that is all it was ever going to be. At the end of the day, the Hornswoggle/Vince story has run out of steam and adding Finlay into the mix isn’t likely to make things that much better. Maybe they can shift things around, but Vince needs to be on to something else.

Post match Finlay destroys Khali with the shillelagh and a low blow, allowing Hornswoggle to escape.

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. Michaels came back in September and went after Orton, who had put him on the shelf. Orton kept getting superkicked but got disqualified last month. Now Michaels wants revenge but can’t use the superkick. If he does, the match is instantly over, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is challenging and we even get a weapons check. Feeling out process with Michaels grabbing a cravate of all things to start. Orton can’t even slam his way out of the cravate but he can drive Shawn into the corner for some right hands. Michaels is right back with a choke on the back before switching to a front facelock as you can feel the anger and hatred here.

Back up and Orton is sent outside, with Shawn hitting an Asai moonsault to take him down. They get back inside with Shawn grabbing a…..wait for it…..Sharpshooter. Orton makes the rope and gets in a poke to the eye, setting up the hanging DDT for two. Shawn fights up and slugs it out, setting up the forearm. More right hands have Orton in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick for two.

Some slams give Michaels a breather and the top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music. That’s a head fake though and they trade some rollups for two each. Michaels grabs a Crossface instead but Orton gets a foot on the rope. The backbreaker cuts Michaels off again but he counters the Punt into an ankle lock of all things. The grapevine goes on in the middle, only to have Orton kick his way to freedom. Michaels’ Figure Four attempt is countered with a kick into the post so he teases the superkick but gets RKOed to retain Orton’s title.

Rating: B. Pretty good here, but the amount of stipulations they had going on made it a little difficult to believe that they were going to change the title here. Shawn not using the superkick at the end looked a bit awkward though and the ending only worked so well. They had a good match otherwise though, which has to be expected when it’s Shawn vs. Orton getting time.

Post match Orton talks trash to Shawn and gets superkicked.

SAVE US!

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker for Batista’s Smackdown World Title. They’ve fought several times this year and Batista finally beat him for the first time last month. Now it’s the big final showdown inside the Cell.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending inside the Cell. They start fast with Batista hitting a hard clothesline but having to elbow his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker punches him into the corner and hits Snake Eyes into the running big boot. The chair is brought in but Batista spears him down. Undertaker’s clothesline gets two this time and they head outside with Undertaker hammering away.

A face rake against the Cell sets up a chair to the throat has Batista in a lot of trouble so Undertaker chairs him in the ribs for two. Old School is countered into a spinebuster (that was cool) for a delayed two and it’s time to slug it out again. Batista’s running powerslam gets two and they head outside with Undertaker getting blasted with a clothesline. Undertaker is fine enough to whip him into the steps and now a chair to the head has Batista busted open.

Old School is broken up again and Batista hits a superplex but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke. Since we’re in the Cell, the rope breaks the hold (erg) and they head outside again. This time Batista hits him in the face with the steps and now Undertaker is busted open too. Back in and a chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is countered into another spinebuster for another near fall.

It’s table time, with Batista tossing him through it for two more. The Batista Bomb onto the steps is countered into a backdrop onto the steps. Undertaker plants him with the chokeslam for two, followed by another onto the steps….and a cameraman breaks it up. That’s because the cameraman is Edge, who cameras Undertaker in the head. A Conchairto on the steps knocks Undertaker silly and Edge puts Batista (who saw nothing) on top to retain.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and it felt like a war, with the Edge interference being a great surprise to give them a back door out of the match. What mattered here is they kept things high impact here, which is exactly what these two do best. Let them go in there and hit all their power stuff until one of them can’t get up, which granted was due to some help in this case. You can all but guarantee the triple threat next month and that is a fresh way to go, so nicely done.

Post match, Edge takes Undertaker down again and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main events carry the show, but there is a really big gap between the top of the card and everything else. Even the third biggest match on the show doesn’t feel that important as the whole show was built around Batista vs. Undertaker. The show was a fun enough watch, but outside of the main event, it doesn’t feel like a lot of this matters in the long run.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Survivor Series 2006
Date: November 26, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,400
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I’ve always been a big Survivor Series fan and there is something great about seeing a milestone show with the 20^th edition. On top of that, we have three elimination tag matches for a change and the card looks pretty awesome. Then again that has been the case with several shows before and you never know if it is going to live up to the hype. The big non-elimination match is Batista vs. King Booker for Book’s Smackdown World Title so let’s get to it.

The opening video briefly talks about the anniversary before moving on to a traditional hype video looking at the big matches.

Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad

Legends: Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Dusty Rhodes, Ron Simmons

Spirit Squad: Kenny, Johnny, Mikey, Nicky

Arn Anderson and Mitch are at ringside. The Squad has been insulting Flair and the rest of the legends so it’s time to go to school. Simmons is replacing the injured Roddy Piper and scares Mikey down to start. A powerslam drops Mikey again and it’s a bunch of clotheslines to take the rest of the Squad down. Mitch offers a distraction though and Simmons goes out after him.

The stalking and watching Anderson beat up Mitch take a bit too long though and Simmons gets counted out. Simmons takes Mitch to the back with him and Anderson is ejected (with the fans NOT approving). That means Nicky gets to come in and request a salute from Slaughter, who works on his arm instead. It’s off to Flair for some shots of his own before handing it back to Slaughter for the cobra clutch. Kenny gets in a kick to the back of Slaughter’s head though and the mostly out Nicky gets the pin.

Dusty comes in for the Bionic Elbow to get rid of Nicky and it’s 3-2. Some jabs get Dusty out of the corner but a rollup is enough to finish him off. That leaves Flair alone against Kenny/Mikey/Johnny but Flair grabs a rollup and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin. A small package gets rid of Kenny, meaning Flair can chop Johnny and put him in the Figure Four for the fast tap. Flair beat the last three of them in about two minutes.

Rating: D. The wrestling wasn’t the point here of course and it isn’t like the Squad means anything in the first place. Flair can beat all of these guys without breaking a sweat and he came pretty close here. The team almost has to be done now and that is going to be better for Raw at this point. The idea wasn’t going to work no matter what they did so to get as much as they did out of them is impressive enough. Pretty bad in-ring stuff, and that was never the point.

Post match the big beatdown is on with no one coming out for the save.

We recap Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero for Benoit’s US Title. Benoit thinks that Chavo and Vickie Guerrero are taking advantage of Eddie Guerrero’s estate but they told him to stay out of their business (a fair point). Chavo beat Benoit up and tonight he can win the title.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo, with Vickie, is challenging. Benoit starts very fast with a slam into a backbreaker for two, followed by easily winning a strike off. A snap suplex and slam get two each on Chavo as JBL says Chavo made Rey quit like a little girl. I’m almost scared to imagine when/how JBL made a little girl say she quit. Chavo comes back with a series of strikes and sends Benoit hard into the post.

There’s a Saito suplex for two and the armbar goes on. Benoit gets creative with a Samoan drop to escape but Chavo dropkicks him right back down. A suplex sets up the frog splash for two but Chavo stops to yell some more. Benoit fights up again and knocks Chavo away for a needed breather so Vickie gets on the apron. After dealing the pesky manager, it’s the Crossface to retain the title.

Rating: C. That is pretty much it for Chavo being seen as anything serious as he loses the big showdown after Benoit kicks out of his finisher. What other reason is there to buy into him at this point? Chavo was not exactly a can’t miss prospect here anyway and it’s ok for him to not win, but this should wrap it up on him being seen as a serious villain, at least for the time being.

Lita, with Edge, affirms that she is still retiring after her title match against Mickie James no matter what. Edge makes fun of Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb while Cryme Tyme sneaks in and steals a box. Edge rants about DX as Cryme Tyme sneaks out of the room.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Mickie James

Lita is defending and gets driven into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs to start. Some kicks to the ribs slow Mickie down and Lita counters a headscissors out of the corner by slamming Mickie down on her face (the simple ones always work). The fans deem Lita a “crack w****” as she gets some near falls. With the chant down, Lawler is right there with more jokes about Lita as the bodyscissors has Mickie in trouble.

Lita misses a splash of all things, sending Lawler into the joy of hope over a wardrobe malfunction. Mickie kicks her in the face for two but the hurricanrana out of the corner is countered into another faceplant. The Litacanrana gets two but the DDT is countered with a grab of the rope. They trade rollups for two each until Mickie hits the MickieDT for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. The match was about what you would expect from a big Raw showdown but what matters is passing the torch (which Mickie has held before). The bad thing here was the amount of jokes at Lita’s expense, as commentary laid it in even thicker than usual. I know she’s leaving, but WWE can be rather cruel with these things at times, which was the case here.

Post match Lita insists on being called the greatest of all time but has to rant at the fans for disrespecting her so much. Cue Cryme Tyme with the box, sending Lita further over the edge. It’s time for a “ho sale” but it’s cash only. First item up is some yeast infection medicine, followed by some underwear (which JBL wants to smell before buying). Something that vibrates goes for $25 and finally, Lita’s box (it’s cheap and wide) is a hot item to wrap it up. Kind of a cruel way to go, but at least it saves them the cost of a trash bag (April 2021 reference for those of you reading this in 3847).

Earlier today, Batista wouldn’t answer any of Michel Cole’s questions. After a clip of the beatdown on Smackdown, Batista says he’s leaving as champion.

Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO

DX: HHH/Shawn Michaels/Matt Hardy/CM Punk/Jeff Hardy

Rated-RKO: Edge/Randy Orton/Gregory Helms/Mike Knox/Johnny Nitro

The fans are way into Punk so HHH lets him ask if they are ready. The bell rings and HHH has Kelly Kelly get on the apron for a better view (while covering Shawn’s eyes of course). The distraction lets Shawn hit the superkick for a fast pin and elimination. Shawn chops away at Nitro and hands it off to Jeff to knock him down as well. Helms comes in to take Matt down and it’s Edge coming in as well to stomp away.

The villains start taking turns on Matt, who has to cover up from Nitro’s right hands to the head. Matt kicks him away and brings Punk in, much to the fans’ delight. Matt’s neck snap across the top sets up a Rock Bottom into the Anaconda Vice to eliminate Nitro. Orton dropkicks Punk down and Helms takes over with a front facelock to keep him on the mat for a bit.

The yet to be named Codebreaker connects for Helms and the RKO gets two with HHH making a save. It’s back to HHH for the jumping knees to the face as everything breaks down. Jeff and Shawn hit some dives onto the floor, leaving HHH to bust Helms’ spine. The Twist of Fate into the spinebuster gets rid of Helms and it’s Rated-RKO against all five members of the other team. Rated-RKO try to leave but get thrown back inside for Poetry in Motion into Sweet Chin Music to get rid of Edge. Another superkick into the Pedigree finishes Orton for the win.

Rating: D+. How weird is it to see a squash in a Survivor Series elimination match? Granted the talent on one side was completely nuts but my goodness man. This was completely one sided and I’m not sure how wise that was. Rated-RKO were decimated here, Helms’ title somehow lost even more value and Nitro was just a guy. It was fun, but I’m not sure if this was the smartest move.

We recap Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Kennedy is the latest young guy to go after Undertaker and say he is the new big star. This time Kennedy even managed to bust Undertaker open with his microphone so tonight it’s a First Blood match, which seems like a nice way out of having someone take a fall.

Mr. Kennedy is ready for his match but MVP gives him a pep talk anyway.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

First Blood. Kennedy hammers away to start and gets knocked over the top for his efforts. Undertaker sends him face first into the announcers’ table and then throws Kennedy over it for a bonus. Some headbutts have Kennedy in pain and there’s a big boot to to drop him again. Kennedy is back up with a whip into the steps but gets posted to cut that off in a hurry. Back in and Undertaker hits a top rope superplex but Kennedy is back with a low blow.

Undertaker doesn’t seem to mind and kicks away at the ribs before hammering away in the corner. Another low blow slows Undertaker down but Kennedy’s nose is busted. Cue MVP to towel Kennedy’s blood off….and throw Kennedy back inside as payback for Kennedy doing the same thing on Smackdown. Kennedy hammers away but here is MVP with a chair, which hits Undertaker by mistake (in theory) to bust him open. The referee finally sees it to give Kennedy the win.

Rating: C. The ending sets up a few more things, including MVP’s complete and utter destruction. Much like MVP winning the cage match against Kane on Smackdown, this is the kind of win that helps make Kennedy look that much more important. Of course it would be better to have Undertaker get pinned, but that isn’t something that happens very often so take what you can get here. Granted that’s Undertaker beating Kennedy up for most of the match and then getting cheated at the end, though I doubt Kennedy would mind.

Post match Kennedy brags about the win and talks a lot of trash, allowing Undertaker to wrap a chair around Kennedy’s head. Kennedy is busted open and Undertaker gives him a nasty Tombstone. The gloves come off and some bare knuckle punches have the bloody Kennedy bleeding even more. The referee drags him off.

Queen Sharmell gives King Booker a pep talk so Booker can monologue about how this is it for Batista.

Team Cena vs. Team Big Show

Cena: John Cena, Bobby Lashley, Rob Van Dam, Kane, Sabu

Big Show: Big Show, Finlay, MVP, Test, Umaga

Cena avoids Umaga’s charge to start and sends him outside. Everything breaks down and Umaga hits Cena in the ribs with a TV monitor for the fact DQ. We settle down to Test elbowing Van Dam in the corner and planting him down so MVP can come in with the chinlock. Van Dam, with his nose bleeding, fights up and scores with the spinning kick to the face.

More kicks put all of the villains down and it’s Kane kicking MVP in the face. The Five Star gets rid of MVP but Test is right there with the big boot to eliminate Van Dam. Test sends Sabu outside but Lashley nails a spear, allowing Sabu to hit a tornado DDT for the pin. Show comes straight in to chokeslam Sabu for the pin as these eliminations are flying by. The Leprechaun comes out to give Finlay the Shillelagh and a shot to the head rocks Kane, setting up a chokeslam so Big Show can get rid of him too.

So it’s Cena/Lashley vs. Show/Finlay with Show powerslamming Cena in a hurry. Finlay comes in to stomp away but Cena gets in a knockdown of his own. That’s enough to bring in Lashley and everything breaks down again. A double clothesline drops Show but here’s the Leprechaun, who is thrown onto Cena. The distraction lets Lashley spear Finlay down for the pin and we’re down to 201. Cena manages to DDT Show and there’s a double suplex to put him down again. The finishing sequence is initiated and the FU finishes Show.

Rating: D+. his match, which featured eight eliminations, is now the longest match of the night at about twelve and a half minutes. I’m not sure why we need to go that short with everything but it has been a problem with almost everything on the show. Cena and Lashley teaming up to take out Show worked, but was there really any need for five eliminations in less than two minutes?

We recap Batista vs. King Booker for the Smackdown World Title. Batista had to vacate the title earlier this year due to an injury in this very building. It is his missing to get it back but Booker isn’t going it up so easily. If Batista loses, he can never challenge Booker for the title again.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Batista

Batista is challenging and starts fast by jumping him before the bell. They get inside to officially start the match with Batista hammering away in the corner. The threat of a Batista Bomb sends Booker bailing to the floor and the fans aren’t pleased. Back in and Batista hammers away even more but a hot shot gets Booker out of trouble. A catapult sends Batista throat first into the bottom rope and Booker stomps away even more.

Booker pokes him in the eye but you don’t need two eyes to hit a side slam for two. They head to the apron for a slugout with Batista knocking him back in. Sharmell grabs the leg though and Booker kicks him out to the floor again. Back in and Booker pounds him down into a chinlock as Cole asks JBL what it feels like to try and get the title back. JBL: “I’m not a loser Michael. Bring up something else.”

Batista fights up and hits the clotheslines into a big boot to send Booker outside. That means a whip into the steps, followed by a top rope shoulder (dang) for two back inside. Booker is right back with a Bookend for two but Batista is up with the Batista Bomb. They’re right next to the rope so Booker saves himself, allowing Sharmell to hand him the title. A Sharmell distraction doesn’t work though as Batista ducks the shot and takes the belt away. Batista’s belt shot is enough for the pin, the title, and the energized celebration.

Rating: D, This really didn’t work and the ending was stupid. How much of a conqueror does this make Batista, when he needed a belt shot to beat Booker? It’s a reclaiming the glory story and that should work, but the lack of drama didn’t help anything. Pretty awful main event with the main bright spot being the fact that they didn’t go long here. It’s the longest match of the show at less than fourteen minutes and it felt every one of them.

Batista celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. For a show that looked pretty fun on paper, this wound up being a nearly complete miss with nothing worth seeing, a bunch of matches that felt rushed, and a World Title change in the end that was about as lame as possible. These Survivor Series matches are supposed to be about hanging in there over a grueling match, but Finlay and Benoit had a match on Smackdown that was longer than anything here. It wasn’t the worst show, but someone needs to teach them how to Survivor Series.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 18, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 14,957
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Summerslam and the big story is Batista defeated John Cena in one heck of a bragging rights match. That is the kind of match that you do not get to see very often and in theory it should make Batista the #1 contender to the Raw World Title. CM Punk dispatched JBL and is going to need a fresh challenger so let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

Here is a rather serious looking Chris Jericho to get things going. He isn’t here to apologize for what happened to Shawn Michaels’ wife last night because the person who should be apologizing is Shawn himself. Shawn is the person who put her in danger, and here is the proof. We see a long recap of the segment, which capped off with Jericho “accidentally” hitting Shawn’s wife in the face.

Back in the arena, the fans are not exactly pleased with Jericho, who says that Shawn could have just sent in a video or something to make his big announcement. Instead he had to come to the ring and do everything in person, which is why his wife got hurt. All Shawn had to do was admit that Jericho was the reason he’s finished and now look what happened. The reality is Shawn has tarnished his reputation and that is something he is going to have to live with for the rest of his life. Jericho slowly walks out, with commentary not being sure what to make of this. Good stuff here, as Jericho was much more somber and it worked.

Batista vs. Paul Burchill

Batista is coming in with a bad knee. Burchill kicks him in the face to start and Batista actually gets knocked into the corner. A shot to the knee cuts off the comeback attempt but Batista is back with a spear. The spinebuster into the Batista Bomb finishes Burchill quick.

Mike Adamle introduces Primo Colon (Carlito’s brother) as the newest member of the Raw roster but John Cena walks past. Adamle tries to talk to him but Cena walks up to Batista, saying last night was great and the better man won. Batista thanks him for that, but Cena says that was last night. Batista: “All right.”

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall/Katie Lea

Jillian’s song from Chicago doesn’t make the Peacock cut. Mickie drives Jillian into the corner to start and then takes both of them down at once. Kelly comes in with a sunset flip for two as we hear about Kelly’s dating tips in an interview. Katie gets Kelly up in an electric chair so Jillian can come in to pull her down in a crash.

The reverse chinlock has Kelly in trouble and Jillian knocks her down for two. Kelly gets some knees up though and the tag brings Mickie back in for some slightly more sophisticated stuff. A neckbreaker gets two on Katie as Jillian makes the save. Mickie and Kelly hit a double dropkick on Jillian, followed by the MickieDT to finish Katie.

Rating: C+. Better than I was expecting here, which granted is mostly due to Mickie carrying things for the team. Jillian is little more than a gimmick and Katie has already peaked. At the same time you have Kelly, who is getting better but still feels like more of a long term project. Granted it’s a project with some upside so there are worse ideas.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Jamie Noble

Noble strikes away to start and hammers away in the corner, only to get caught with the fall away slam. The slow beating is on until the Clothesline From JBL puts Noble out. JBL won’t cover though and instead hits another Clothesline, followed by another clothesline, which is enough for the stoppage.

Here is Mike Adamle for some announcements. First up, tonight’s main event is CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho. Speaking of the Raw World Title, Shane and Stephanie McMahon have told him to make a new announcement: at Unforgiven, there will be a 20 minute Championship Scramble for the title. There can be multiple falls, but the last person to score one will be the official World Heavyweight Champion. Here are the participants: World Champion CM Punk, Kane, JBL, Batista and John Cena. That’s not bad. Not the concept that is, as that’s a cool idea, but rather Adamle getting through this without any major errors.

John Cena vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase

Non-title. Hold on though as here is Cryme Tyme, who steal the Tag Team Titles and run off. DiBiase looks ready to start but Rhodes comes in instead and we take an early break. Back with Rhodes getting in a cheap shot out of the corner, which is enough for a chase around the ring and a tag off to DiBiase. Back in and DiBiase hammers away, setting up a double suplex for two, followed by a dropkick for the same. Rhodes knocks him to the apron and then into the barricade before it’s back to DiBiase.

Cena’s missed charge into the corner lets DiBiase grab a belly to back suplex, setting up a clothesline for two. Cena tries the comeback but DiBiase grabs the arm so Rhodes can drop him again as the numbers advantage continues. A flying shoulder misses for Cena as well as he just can’t keep anything going. DiBiase snaps off a suplex but tries a second, which Cena reverses into one of his own. That’s enough to start the real comeback, with Cena firing off the shoulders into the Shuffle on Rhodes. DiBiase gets knocked to the floor and the STF finishes Rhodes clean.

Rating: C. Yeah not a fan of the Tag Team Champions losing for the second time in three weeks, especially with Cena out there on his own. It also wasn’t a very entertaining match, as it was mostly Cena selling for over ten minutes before coming back with his usual to win. There was no other team other than the champs to take this loss?

Harley Race is here.

We look at Chris Jericho accidentally (in theory) hitting Shawn Michaels’ wife last night.

Last night, Shawn and his wife Rebecca were going to leave the arena but Shawn stopped to say he was going to come home and comfort his family, because she got punched in the face because of him. And then….and then….and I guess that sums it up.

CM Punk says what Chris Jericho did last night was reprehensible but they deal with people like him in Chicago.

Santino Marella vs. D’Lo Brown

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Santino while Kofi Kingston comes out to join commentary. Santino knocks him down for an early two as Kingston wants to know who wears the pants in Glamarella. Brown fights back and hits a quick legdrop but Phoenix gets in the ring to block the Low Down. Brown: “GET TO STEPPIN! I SAID GET TO STEPPIN!” That’s enough for Phoenix to slap Brown in the face for the fast DQ.

Post match Santino goes after Kingston, who knocks him silly with a ram into the announcers’ table.

Classics On Demand: Trish Stratus b. Stacy Keibler in a bikini contest.

Here is Kane to explain why he was carrying around Rey Mysterio’s mask in a bag. He’s been carrying the bag around for a while because it put a smile on his face. Mysterio has not been around for about six weeks, because Kane has never really liked him. Kane calls Mysterio a slithering little slime that hides behind a mask and like a fungus that grows in the marshes of your psyche.

Six weeks ago, he attacked Mysterio but spared his life. Mysterio is alive, but his spirit is broken and dead. We get some evil laughter, which is enough to bring out a limping Batista. The brawl is on but Kane goes after the bag leg and hits a chokeslam to escape. Should be a good hoss fight when we get around to it.

CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title and Jericho has Lance Cade with him. The fans are of course behind Punk and Jericho does not like that. They take their time to start until Punk strikes him down for an early two. Punk cranks on both arms but Jericho slips out, only to miss a charge into the post as we take an early break. Back with Punk getting pulled into a chinlock before Jericho bends his back over the knee. That’s broken up with a kick to the head so Jericho pulls him into an abdominal stretch.

Punk fights out again and grabs his own backbreaker for his own two, followed by the corner clothesline. The bulldog is blocked though and Jericho hits the Lionsault for two. The Walls go on but Punk reverses into a rollup for two and the escape. Jericho slips out of a GTS attempt and grabs the Walls, sending Punk crawling over to the ropes. Another GTS attempt is countered and Jericho goes up, only to get kneed in the face. The super bulldog leaves both of them down but a quick Cade distraction lets Jericho hit the Codebreaker for the win.

Rating: B-. Well of course Punk, who is already seen as an underdog champion, loses in his hometown with the least amount of interference. It’s nice that there is a little something in there to protect Punk, but this felt like WWE was trying to make him look bad in front of his friends and family (who they made clear were there). The match was pretty good, but the result felt like such annoying business as usual from WWE.

Overall Rating: B-. This was mainly about setting up the major players before the Championship Scramble, even with the champion himself losing in the end. The good thing is that covers a lot of ground and eats up a bunch of time on the show, as there wasn’t much good on the undercard. Unforgiven feels like it’s going to be a one match show, but it’s one of those matches with so much in it that the show should work out. Now just get a little something else for some insurance, as a two match card sounds even better.

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Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We’re wrapping up the summer with this big one, though it is more or less a two match show. On the Raw side, that would be John Cena vs. Batista, while the Smackdown side counters with Edge vs. Undertaker inside the Cell. That should be enough to carry the show, which is pretty much what WWE is going with, as the rest of the show does not feel nearly as important (which, fair enough). Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a trailer for the ultimate summer blockbuster, complete with clips of Summerslams past. I’ve seen worse ideas. The Cell match gets some hype as well.

MVP vs. Jeff Hardy

MVP fires off some kicks to start but gets chased to the floor, where Hardy takes over rather quickly. Back in and Hardy hits a slingshot legdrop before cranking on the arm for a change. MVP fights up and catches a charging Hardy in an overhead belly to belly into the corner for a nasty crash. A double underhook crank goes on, followed by a camel clutch to keep Hardy down. That’s broken up so MVP switches over to a half crab and then something like a heel hook as the submissions are varying here.

Hardy tries to fight up again but what looked like a springboard is cut off by a hard right hand. MVP ties him in the Tree of Woe but Hardy slips out and grabs a neckbreaker for a breather. The slingshot dropkick is cut off by a kick to the chest though and Hardy is right back in the corner. That doesn’t last long as he comes right back out with the Sling Blade but cue Shelton Benjamin for a distraction. Hardy takes him down but misses the Swanton, allowing MVP to hit the Drive By for the pin.

Rating: B-. They were getting going near the end here and it wound up being a rather nice way to open the show without it feeling like a major match. Odds are Hardy is going to get another US Title shot after the Benjamin interference but I’m curious to see what is next for MVP. There isn’t much in the way of another upper midcarder for him to face so other than a rematch with Hardy, he’s kind of in a weird place.

Maria interviews Santino Marella and Beth Phoenix, with Santino saying Maria has let herself go since they broke up. They are known as Glamarella, which is a total phenomenon. Maria: “Like your unibrow?” Santino says they they need to go, with Beth glaring at Maria and saying Santino is all his. Santino: “This is awkward.”

Intercontinental Title/Women’s Title: Kofi Kingston/Mickie James vs. Santino Marella/Beth Phoenix

Kofi and Mickie are defending and it’s winner takes all. Mickie has to get away from Beth’s power to start before kicking out the leg. A basement dropkick gives Mickie two but a belly to back suplex puts her right back down. Santino comes in and is promptly monkey flipped, allowing Kofi to come in and hammer away. Beth stops to yell at Santino and gets dropkicked out to the floor, leaving her to catch Santino as he is knocked off the apron.

Back up and Santino manages a neckbreaker over the ropes to take over on Kofi. A snap suplex gets two on Kofi and we hit the chinlock. Kofi fights up and hands it back to Mickie to take over on Beth. A dropkick knocks Santino off the apron and the top rope Thesz press gets two on Beth, with Santino diving back in for the save. The MickieDT plants Santino but the distraction lets Beth hit the Glam Slam for the pin and both titles.

Rating: C. The match was pretty quick and to the point, but it isn’t like Kofi was doing anything significant as champion and Mickie had held her title for a good while. Glamarella is a better act at the moment and it makes sense to change both belts. Go with what makes sense here, as Santino as the in over his head champion who needs Beth to save him should be fun.

Beth having to wake Santino up so he can be awarded his title is funny. He gets on Beth’s shoulders to be carried out for a great bonus.

We recap Shawn Michaels’ eye injury, which might result in the end of his career, all at the hands of Chris Jericho. It is time for him to make an announcement, and you know Jericho is going to have something to say as well.

Here is Shawn, with his wife Rebecca, for his announcement. He gets right to the point, saying he has been talking to his doctors and with the injury to his eye, on top of his back and knees and everything else, it is time to listen to his doctors. Shawn talks about some of the highs and lows of his career, but now he has the chance to be known as a full time husband and father. Before he can make the officially announcement though, here is Chris Jericho to interrupt.

Jericho: “No.” Shawn: “Excuse me?” Jericho isn’t going to let Shawn walk away like this, because he wants to hear Shawn admit that he is leaving because of what Jericho did to him. Jericho wants Shawn to have to go home to his family and say that he isn’t good enough. For now, he wants Shawn to admit that Jericho put him out for good. All of his accomplishments mean nothing because the epitaph for Shawn’s career says “the man who was forced to walk away from the ring because of Chris Jericho.”

Shawn says he’ll go home and tell his kids that he can’t wrestle anymore because of a vile human being. Jericho needs to go home too though, and sit his wife and kids down to tell them that he will never, ever be Shawn Michaels. They stare at each other and Jericho comes up swinging, with Shawn ducking so the punch hits Rebecca instead.

Shawn is distraught and Jericho looks upset before leaving. Jericho stares back at him and Shawn looks almost lost before checking on Rebecca again. Rebecca eventually gets up and leaves with Shawn as this gets the time that it needs. This was REALLY good stuff with Jericho selling the jealousy and Shawn getting in the great mic drop line at the end.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy

Henry, with Tony Atlas, is defending. Hardy slugs away to start but is easily powered into the corner. A Twist of Fate connects out of nowhere…but Atlas breaks up the cover and that’s a DQ in about thirty seconds. Well that’s either a time crunch or they had nothing else to do and needed to extend the feud another month.

Post match the beatdown is on but Jeff Hardy runs in for the save.

We recap CM Punk defending the Raw World Title against JBL. Punk won the title via Money In The Bank cash-in and JBL keeps talking down to him for being in over his head. Punk is out to prove he belongs on this level.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Punk is defending and gets powered into the corner to start for a clean break. A headlock doesn’t work so Punk kicks away and dropkicks JBL out to the floor, setting up the big dive. Back in and JBL hits a big shoulder to take over, setting up a super fall away slam for two. Some elbows to the back keep Punk in trouble and we hit the bearhug.

Punk fights out but charges into a boot to the face for two. The waistlock stays on the ribs before JBL switches over to the abdominal stretch. Punk fights out and manages the running knee in the corner but JBL is back with a heck of a clothesline (not the Clothesline From JBL but rather just a clothesline from JBL).

Another comeback with a kick to the head gives Punk two but JBL powerslams him out of the air for two more. The Clothesline From JBL is broken up with a leg lariat but JBL cuts off the bulldog out of the corner. JBL sends him flying with a belly to back superplex and Punk is bleeding from somewhere on his head. Back up and Punk hits a quick GTS for the really sudden pin to retain (possibly due to the cut).

Rating: C+. It was a fine come from behind win for Punk, even if the ending was really sudden. What matters the most though is giving Punk a clean pin over someone with some status. He still only feels so much like a major star, but a win in a World Title match at Summerslam should help that. Now just make him slightly more important on Raw and it will be even better.

We recap HHH vs. Great Khali for the Smackdown World Title. HHH is the champion but Khali is big. End of story.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

HHH is defending and Khali has Runjin Singh with him. The early right hands stagger Khali but he easily blocks a Pedigree attempt. HHH’s clotheslines are cut off with the tree slam but Khali would rather pose than cover. The Vice Grip is broken up and a chop block takes Khali down. They go outside where the big chop knocks HHH silly and it’s time to stomp away back inside.

The fans think Khali can’t wrestle and he proves them wrong by grabbing a nerve hold. That stays on for a good while but HHH slugs away and hits a facebuster to tie Khali’s arms in the ropes. Khali kicks his way out so HHH goes after the leg and even ties it around the post in a smart move. Not that it matters as Khali chops him down again and the Vice Grip goes on again. Since it’s HHH, he manages to power out and, after another failed attempt, hits the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: C. That’s on something of a sliding scale as Khali is only going to be so good on his best day and the match wasn’t exactly good. That being said, they followed a simple formula here of Khali slowly beating him down and grinding away while HHH just tried for his one big home run dhow. It wasn’t good, but I’ll take a “that could have been worse” for a World Title match involving Khali.

We recap John Cena vs. Batista in their first ever match in WWE. I don’t think it needs much more of an explanation than that.

John Cena vs. Batista

Batista grabs a headlock into a running shoulder to start but Cena is back with a hiptoss. Back up and Cena’s shoulder runs Batista over for a change but Batista gets two off a suplex. A side slam gives Batista two more and he mixes things up with a Figure Four of all things. The leg is fine enough that Cena gets to the rope and FU’s Batista over the top for a crash out to the floor. While Cena gets a breather, Batista comes up holding his knee, which can’t go well.

Back in and Cena hits another Shuffle but the second FU is broken up. Batista powers him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs but the Batista Bomb is countered into a DDT on the knee. Cena gets the STFU but Batista powers out into something like a rear naked choke for a change.

A shot to the knee gets Cena out of trouble, only for Batista to spear him down for two. Cena manages to reverse a powerslam into an FU for a rather delayed two. They go up top with Cena knocking him off the top, only for the top rope Fameasser to be countered into a powerbomb for two more. The Batista Bomb gives Batista the pin.

Rating: B. It didn’t quite live up to the hype, but how can anything live up to that kind of pressure? This was the definition of a dram match with two of the biggest names in WWE facing off for the first time. It also wasn’t very long, not even breaking fourteen minutes. What we got was good, but it felt like it should have been incredible and it just never got there.
The Cell is lowered.

We recap Edge vs. the Undertaker inside the Cell. This is more about Edge vs. his wife Vickie Guerrero, as Edge cheated on her with their wedding planner. As a result, Vickie put him in the Cell match as revenge. Edge has tapped into his more evil, aggressive side to fight back against Undertaker but also to deal with Vickie. Undertaker hasn’t appeared during the whole thing and is more a big shadow over the real feud, making it kind of a weir build. Edge has done well though and is feeling more like the great version of himself, which gives this promise.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Inside the Cell. They start slowly until Undertaker kicks him in the face. It’s already time to head out to the floor, where Edge is sent hard into the Cell. Another whip sends him into the steps as this is one sided so far. Undertaker drops the apron legdrop as we see La Familia watching backstage. The steps are set up in the corner and Edge is Snaked Eyesed onto them….which wakes Edge up for some reason. Undertaker is sent into the steps and then speared against the for a bonus.

It’s table time but first, Edge knocks him silly with the steps again. Edge can’t manage to suplex him through two tables at ringside though and has to fight out of a chokeslam attempt. A chair to the throat puts Undertaker down again so let’s throw in a ladder as well. One heck of a chair shot to the head puts Undertaker down, allowing Edge to put him onto the table. The chair shot off the ladder crushes Undertaker and they’re both down. Edge is up first and loads up a Conchairto, which takes too long, allowing Undertaker to slug away.

A big boot sends Edge into the Cell and some hard steps to the head makes it worse. Edge manages a posting though and the spear sends Undertaker through the Cell wall for the big crash. It’s Undertaker up first and he hits Edge in the head with a TV monitor. They go onto the announcers’ table, with Edge hitting a spear to send him through the other table. Somehow Undertaker is up first again and hits Edge with the bell.

They go back inside (the fans do not approve), where Edge is waiting with a ladder to the head. A camera to the head (ala Survivor Series last year when Edge cost Undertaker in the Cell) but Undertaker pops back up with a chokeslam for two. The Last Ride is broken up with a low blow and Edge hits the Edgecution for two. Another spear gets another two but Undertaker is back up with the Last Ride for the same. The Tombstone onto the steps is broken up and Edge sends him head first onto the steps for a double breather.

For some reason Edge goes up, allowing Undertaker to chokeslam him off the top and through a pair of tables for the huge crash. Back in and Undertaker hits a spear of his own before grabbing the camera (Undertaker: “WELCOME TO H***!” That’s a good line but it would have been better if that was the active camera, instead giving us a shot of Undertaker shouting into a camera from the side). A Conchairto and the Tombstone finally finish Edge.

Rating: A-. These two beat the fire out of each other and it made for a great fight. They even told a story with the violence as Edge threw everything he had at Undertaker but just wasn’t good enough. That’s what Vickie Guerrero was hoping to do here and it made for a great story. Undertaker massacred Edge here and the ending felt like a total destruction, which is exactly what it should have been. Heck of a main event here and it lived up to the hype.

Post match Undertaker stands up a ladder and puts Edge on it. Undertaker climbs up a second ladder and chokeslams Edge through the mat. Fire comes up from the hole to to hammer in the symbolism and end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The last two matches delivered and thankfully those were the matches that mattered by far the most. Throw in a pretty awesome Shawn/Jericho segment and this was a good show. What mattered here was the show felt important, which is what something like Summerslam should do. WWE still needs to boost up something else other than the main stories, but for now they were enough to carry the show.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 11, 2008
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before Summerslam and we have new Raw Tag Team Champion as Batista and John Cena won the belts last week. Odds are their reign won’t last long but they already have a match set for Summerslam anyway. Other than that, JBL is the new #1 contender to CM Punk’s World Title so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of John Cena and Batista winning the Tag Team Titles last week, despite not being able to stand each other.

Here is Cena to get things going. Cena talks about how Mike Adamle made a match between himself and Batista at Summerslam for the first time ever. The two of them have never had an issue before, but now they are the Tag Team Champions. Earlier today, Adamle was looking for ideas for Cena and Batista, ranging from a broken glass arm wrestling match to a chili cook off but all you need is the two of them in the ring together.

Cue Batista, with Cena saying they won the titles last week, but tonight they have a rematch against Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase. They have to work together or they’ll both lose, but that isn’t happening at Summerslam. Cena has never admitted this to anyone, but he has spent six years watching Batista be groomed to be the to star and Cena never had that.

Instead, he has spent years going to war to turn critics into believers. They both have impressive resumes, but they have never answered the question of who is better. We’ll answer that question at Summerslam and it’s going to be Cena. Batista says he’s been watching Cena as well and compares their resume. He has watched Cena get booed out of the building but Cena never changed a thing.

Batista would never do some of those things, but there are a bunch of people over the age of 15 who want to see him beat Cena senseless. On Sunday, he’s going to prove he’s the better man. A rather intense handshake wraps it up. This is a match that writes itself but they’ve done a great job of making it more interesting.

Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Santino Marella is on commentary. Beth powers her into the corner to start but gets slapped in the face. That doesn’t go well for Kelly, who gets taken down and then faceplanted for her efforts. As Santino drops the name “Glamarella” for his relationship with Beth, Kelly slips out of a gorilla press and gets two off a rollup. Not that it matters as the Glam Slam finishes for Beth in a hurry.

Post match Santino comes in to say he wants to send a message to Mickie James and Kofi Kingston by having Beth beat Kelly up again. Kingston and James run in for the save to clear the villains out…but Santino wants to face James right now. See, he needs practice on figuring out where he can put his hands while facing a woman. Kingston says he’ll do it, but Santino says “don’t be a girl”. It turns out those are fighting words so James is in. Santino promises to put her back in the kitchen where she belongs.

Santino Marella vs. Mickie James

We’re joined in progress after a break, apparently with Santino having insulted James’ parents during the break. James’ headlock doesn’t work very well but she’s able to headscissor her way out of Santino’s version. James trips him down and rides him a bit (spanking included of course) but Santino gets in a slam. The knee drop misses but Santino distracts the referee, allowing Beth Phoenix to get in a cheap shot. Kofi Kingston protests, only for Santino to grab a rollup with tights for the pin.

Mike Adamle is talking to Todd Phillips when Kane comes in. Adamle has an idea for him tonight: a match with Chris Jericho. Works for Kane, but Adamle also wants the bag that Kane has been holding. Kane says Adamle doesn’t want to do that, but Adamle says we don’t want kids going back to school and carrying a bag like his. Kane calls this a huge mistake before leaving. Fair enough, but the mistake was made by having Adamle talk this much in the first place.

We look at a classic clip of the Valiant Brothers losing the World Tag Team Titles to Ivan Putski and Tito Santana.

Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase talk about Batista and John Cena not being a team, meaning they’ll lose the titles back tonight. They’re young, but they’re further along than any Hall Of Famer was at this point. Maybe next year they’ll be facing off in the main event of Summerslam, but the difference is they really respect each other.

Cryme Tyme vs. Highlanders

Cole calls this a very important match, showing that Cole is either a liar or a moron. Gaspard powers Rory around to start but a cheap shot lets the Highlanders take over on JTG. Rory starts in on JTG’s arm but a hammerlock is broken up. It’s back to Shad to clothesline Robbie and a delayed suplex sets up an STO for the fast pin. Cryme Tyme moving into the title picture wouldn’t be a bad idea.

Randy Orton has been involved in a motorcycle accident and is hurt all over again. And the delays continue. Maybe we can get some RNN Breaking News about him going forward though.

Here is JBL with a special challenge for CM Punk, who comes out before anything can be said. JBL goes into his usual insults about Punk, who finally cuts him off to say he’s tired of hearing the same things since he’s won this title. No he isn’t your traditional champion but he’s watched every Summerslam since he was a kid and it’s going to be a dream come true to beat JBL at that show.

Punk says that with all due respect to Batista and John Cena, this is the real main event. JBL is incensed that Punk would compare himself to stars like Cena and Batista. He asks how Punk has earned his place and calls him Cinderella. Midnight strikes on Sunday though because fairy tales aren’t real. Punk has talent, but he also has six days left as champion. JBL rolls up his sleeves (JBL: “Settle down Cinderella.”) and pulls back a sheet revealing a bottle of whiskey. He wants a drinking contest with Mr. Straightedge, which JBL finds boring.

JBL pours Punk a drink, saying he’ll have a chance to win if he takes that one drink. If Punk won’t do it, he won’t be able to win against JBL on Sunday. Punk says JBL doesn’t get it because they’re not the same person. Doing things his way has gotten Punk this far so he’ll pass on the drink. JBL says he didn’t realize Punk brought his soapbox so he’ll toast to Punk instead.

Hold on though as Punk says JBL changed his mind so he’ll do the toast. And the drink is thrown into JBL’s face, setting up the running knee in the corner. I’m not sure what the point of the drinking thing was supposed to be here, but they did a nice job of presenting the differences between them. JBL’s old school stuff is fine, but geez he makes everything he says sound so dull and it’s not helping.

We look at Shawn Michaels’ eye injury, with a decision about his career set for Summerslam.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Lance Cade is here with Jericho, who is ran over and dropkicked to start. Kane powers him out of the corner but misses an elbow. Not that it matters as Kane takes it outside and knocks Jericho around again before heading back inside. Cade’s distraction lets Jericho hit the triangle dropkick and he gets to hammer away a bit.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Kane is back up again with a spinning toss (looked like the side slam to start but he just tossed Jericho instead). Kane misses a charge into the corner but it’s too early for the Walls. Now the side slam can connect, followed by the top rope clothesline…and here is Mike Adamle with a bunch of security. Kane goes over to get the bag though, allowing Jericho to hit the Codebreaker for the pin.

Rating: C+. These two often worked pretty well against each other but it was weird to see a heel vs. heel match between them. Kane losing here is a bit strange as he’s the current monster, but at least he was distracted. That being said, putting Kane in a story with Adamle doesn’t seem like the best idea. Then again, Kane has a history of being in bad stories and he tends to….well sometimes he makes them better.

Post match Adamle says he knows what Kane is talking about, because the “he” Kane has been asking about is Kane himself. Adamle knows Kane has been struggling to find those answers but Kane can lead a normal life by giving Adamle that bag. The fans need to know what is in the bag and, after comparing himself to Ronald Reagan’s “tear down this wall”, Adamle says “give me that bag”.

Kane says there is a mask in the bag and the man who wore it has been scarred and tortured beyond all human recognition. The problem is that it’s not Kane’s mask. Kane opens the bag and pulls out….Rey Mysterio’s mask. Adamle is confused, but that might just be how he normally looks.

William Regal vs. Jamie Noble

Regal pounds away to start and they’re quickly on the floor for a ram into the apron. Back in and Noble knocks him into the corner for a Cannonball. A high crossbody gives Noble two but Regal snaps off a suplex. The running knee finishes Noble quick.

Smackdown Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

We get the results of the poll from earlier, with John Cena being named the bigger star over Batista 73%-27%. Dang that’s a squash.

Raw Tag Team Titles: John Cena/Batista vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase Jr.

Rhodes and DiBiase are challenging and don’t even get an entrance. Batista insists he start but Cena slaps him from the apron to come in instead. Rhodes and DiBiase jump Cena to take over, which lasts all of a few seconds before Cena shoulders his way to freedom. Cena tells Batista that he can’t see him and we take a break. Back with DiBiase holding Cena in a chinlock, which doesn’t last long either as Cena powers up.

DiBiase misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Batista to clean house. The spinebuster hits DiBiase but Batista stops to taunt Cena, who breaks up the Batista Bomb. A cheap shot to the knee cuts Batista off and Rhodes cranks away on the leg. Batista powers up and slaps Cena in the face for a tag, which has Cena glaring at him. The glaring Cena gets rolled up to give DiBiase the pin and the titles back.

Rating: C. The match was pretty slow paced and much like last week was much more about the story than the wrestling. That’s how something like this should have gone as there was no reason for Batista and Cena to keep the titles long term. Cena and Batista want to fight and they have nothing else to worry about, which is the way this should go.

Post match Cena and Batista are ready to fight but have to dispatch Rhodes and DiBiase again. With the villains gone, Cena teases walking out without a fight but that’s just not his nature. Security comes in, gets knocked down, and then cuts off the fight to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. In case it isn’t clear, John Cena vs. Batista is by far the best thing going on with this show. It feels big and it comes off as the most important thing you’re going to be able to see right now. The Kane stuff is more weird than anything else (but it took a good turn here), the mixed tag stuff could be worse, and the Punk vs. JBL stuff is just dull. That leaves Cena and Batista miles ahead of everything else an I want to see those two fight on Sunday. I don’t quite want to see the rest of the show, which is about as hit or miss as you can get.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 4, 2008
Location: Thompson-Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

For reasons I still do not want to understand, we’re in the Mike Adamle Era as he is the new GM of the show. Other than that nightmare, we have less than two weeks to go before Summerslam and the real main event from Raw is set as John Cena will face Batista. Other than that, CM Punk still needs an official challenger and we might get that tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick note: I did the Saturday Night’s Main Event but it didn’t save properly and was lost. Normally I would redo it but a grand total of nothing happened on the show and I’m not going to waste even more time on such a pathetic excuse for a “special”.

Here is Mike Adamle to get things going. The fans are all over him before he tells a story about a man who worked in a circus like atmosphere and wasn’t very good at his job. He’s talking about Ronald Reagan, who went from being a B list movie star to the Presidency. Reagan acted with a monkey, while Adamle said Jeff Harvey.

There have been people criticizing his work as an ECW commentator and wanting his resignation. That is your right as an American but it isn’t an American that he wants to be in. He wants to be in an America where a 5’9 man can play seven years in the NFL and be a star. As for tonight, how many people would like to see a championship match tonight? Instead, we’ll do three of them, with Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase defending the Tag Team Titles against John Cena/Batista….and here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL knows what it means to make a bad first impression, but now people see him for the success that he is. After bragging about being featured in Fortune Magazine and being a former professional football player, he brings up the World Title match at Summerslam. Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying he should get the title shot instead.

Bickering ensues, but Adamle cuts them off and makes JBL/Jericho vs. CM Punk, where either of them get the title shot at Summerslam if they beat him. If Punk wins, neither gets a title shot. That’s kind of an unfair stipulation, but I had to listen to Adamle talk so there is nothing fair. He’s just not the right pick for this spot and that was even more apparent here.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Paul Burchill

Burchill, with Katie Lea, is challenging and works on a wristlock to start. Kingston flips him over for two as we hear about Burchill’s rugby career. Some right hands in the corner keep Burchill in trouble but Katie offers a distraction, allowing Burchill to get in a clothesline. We hit something like a seated crossface chickenwing until Kingston fights up and strikes away. A crossbody gives Kingston two and Trouble In Paradise retains the title.

Rating: C+. Hopefully this finishes Burchill as a challenger as it feels like it has been going on for months now. Burchill hasn’t felt like a big time challenger but he keeps going after Kingston. The clean finish gives me some hope though as there is pretty much no reason to keep this going.

Post match the Burchills go after Kingston again, only to be cleared out. Cue Mickie James for her scheduled match with Katie.

Women’s Title: Katie Lea vs. Mickie James

Joined in progress with Mickie striking away, including a dropkick to the floor. Mickie hits a Thesz press off the apron and strikes away before doing the same in the corner. A neckbreaker over the ropes has Mickie in more trouble and we hit the surfboard. With that broken up, Mickie hits her own neckbreaker for two but Lea’s suplex gets the same. Not that it matters as the MickieDT retains the title.

Rating: C. This feud has been going even longer than Kingston vs. Burchill and it’s nice to seemingly have it wrap up. Mickie is in need of a fresh challenger for the title and there aren’t many options around here. Lea is fine enough in the ring but there are only so many people she can face at the moment. For now though, it doesn’t seem to be Mickie and that’s fine.

Post match Beth Phoenix runs in to take Mickie out. Santino Marella approves and mild spanking ensues.

Mike Adamle calls Stephanie McMahon to thank her for the opportunity. Beth Phoenix and Santino Marella come in to interrupt because they both want title shots at Summerslam. Adamle says there is only room for one more match so they bicker a bit. Adamle finally cuts them off and makes a tag match between the two of them and Kofi Kingston/Mickie James, winner take all.

Video on John Cena.

Batista is happy to get a shot at the Tag Team Titles but could go for a different partner. He could also go for the World Title shot at Summerslam but if beating John Cena gets him there, so be it.

Layla dances in the ring and we see a clip of her ending things with Jamie Noble (who had made reservations at Waffle House). Cue William Regal to remind us that he is the King Of The Ring but here is Noble to interrupt. The brawl is on but referees break it up.

CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield

Non-title. Hold on though as Mike Adamle pops up on screen to say that this match has a ten minute time limit. If the match goes to the time limit, it’s a triple threat match at Summerslam for the title. JBL and Jericho argue to start so Punk jumps them, not wanting a triple threat either. A double shoulder drops Punk and Jericho gets sent outside. The fall away slam gives JBL two on Punk an JBL slowly hammers away in the corner.

Jericho manages to send JBL into the steps though and the chinlock has Punk in trouble. Back up and Punk catches him on top, only to get pulled into an abdominal stretch with five minutes left. JBL comes back in and tries to steal the pin on Punk, meaning it’s time for the villains to slug it out. JBL gets sent outside so the Lionsault can give Jericho two. Punk is back up with a springboard clothesline to JBL before sending Jericho into the corner with three minutes left.

Punk’s running knee in the corner sets up the bulldog to drop JBL and the GTS gets two with Jericho making the save. Jericho gets catapulted into JBL for two as we have a minute and a half left. Another GTS attempt is countered into the Walls on Punk with JBL making his own save…and then falling on Punk to steal the pin with one second left.

Rating: C+. This had quite a few different rules and while they might have been more complicated than necessary, at least it clears up the question of who will be getting the title shot. On the other hand, it’s JBL, who is just so boring with everything he does that he drains the life out of everything. Punk should be able to get a nice title defense, but dang it is not going to be interesting on the way there.

We get a long recap of Chris Jericho injuring Shawn Michaels’ eye and possibly ending his career.

Michaels joins us from San Antonio and says his eye is really banged up. The injury has allowed him to take a break and heal up a bit but he has all kinds of health issues. He has another evaluation two days before Summerslam and he wants to come to the show and announce his decision. If he is allowed to compete, even on a part time basis, he’ll do it, but he’s going to listen to his doctors. Chris Jericho said maybe Shawn should just go home and be with his family….and maybe he should.

Here is Matt Striker to remind us who he is and request the best competition.

Matt Striker vs. Kane

Kane powers him away to start and shrugs off a forearm to the back. Kane plants him with a slam, hits the top rope clothesline and finishes with the chokeslam.

Post match Kane grabs the bag he has been carrying around and says he has been in a bad place lately. He looks at the bag and says “he’s not alive, he’s dead.”

Smackdown Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

Video on Batista.

John Cena talks about how that video gives him a perspective on Batista, because it makes him know what Batista can do in the ring. As for Mike Adamle, we’ll have to see what happens with his time as the boss, but anyone can see what happens when Cena and Batista face off.

Cena has been overshadowed by Batista more than once and knew that they were going to go head to head at some point. They they both wound up on Raw and he knew it would happen one day. Then a few weeks ago, he punched Batista in the face and knew that one day was going to be at Summerslam. First though, they can become Tag Team Champions. Cena hopes they win. This was the kind of promo that made the match feel so much bigger, which is where Cena tends to shine.

Kelly Kelly comes in to see Mike Adamle to compliment him on everything he has done. She brings up Kane, but Adamle has an idea for him for next week. For now though, she’s going to watch the main event with him.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Batista/John Cena

Cena and Batista are challenging. DiBiase starts with Cena and is quickly knocked down for an early two. Batista comes in to shove Rhodes down and fires off the shoulders in the corner. A missed charge goes into the post though and we take a break. Back with Rhodes working on the arm but Batista powers out again and hands it off to Cena. DiBiase breaks up the FU though and hits a belly to back. The fist drop (ala his dad) has commentary thinking DiBiase is mocking the Five Knuckle Shuffle because these two aren’t very good at times.

Batista does not look impressed as Cena gets double elbowed down for two more. Rhodes grabs a sleeper (from the left for a weird look) and then DiBiase does the same (from the right side, in case you were wondering), only to have Cena reverse into one of his own. That’s broken up as well but Cena walks over and slaps Batista in the face for the tag. A backdrop and spear take DiBiase down and Cena cuts Rhodes off, leaving the Batista Bomb to connect for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. The match itself was fairly dull, but the storytelling with Batista not wanting to do this because he can’t stand Cena, while Cena is always going to want to compete and win because that’s who he is. It made for an interesting dynamic and gives another layer to a match that is pretty much already set up. Other than that, it was a fairly long match with Cena and Batista running through the champions at the end, which is a bit more acceptable when you have a modern day Mega Powers in Cena and Batista.

Batista rather forcefully hands Cena his belt and they slowly hold up the titles. It turns into a pose off and then a staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show is pretty much Cena/Batista and then everything else, as there is very little that I would want to see otherwise. Adamle is just not interesting, which might be what they’re going for but it’s not making for the most thrilling material. Other than that, you have the World Title stuff which is hardly making me want to see what happens next. Batista and Cena are good stuff, but I’m going to need a lot more than that to sell this side of the Summerslam card.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 28, 2008
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 14,722
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to Summerslam and the end of last week’s show seemed to set up what could be a heck of a big Raw main event. It seems that we are on the way to a showdown between John Cena and Batista, which is the kind of a match that could headline Wrestlemania if given the chance. That should do for Summerslam, but we could be in for a bit of an uneven reaction in Batista’s hometown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of the Batista/John Cena/CM Punk/Kane/JBL situation from last week, leaving us with Batista and Cena squaring off to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Here is John Cena to get things going and he has to acknowledge the mixed reaction. He is now perfect and he has made a mistake, meaning there are consequences to face. Last week, he hit Batista in the mouth and that means there are going to be consequences (I think he said that already.). If Batista would like to come out here, they can settle those consequences right now.

Cue Batista, who says that he saw what happened and they’re cool. They’re cool enough that once Batista defeats CM Punk to win the World Title, Cena is getting the first shot. Cena finds that nice….but Batista has already had his two shots. There are a lot of guys who deserve a shot and Cena isn’t sure Batista is at the top of that list. Batista laughs and says he knows CM Punk can’t beat him and neither can Cena.

That has Cena laughing as well, saying that Batista must be glad to be back home. A match between them should headline Wrestlemania, but what if we did Wrestlemania tonight? Batista likes the sound of that….but here is the returning Shane McMahon to interrupt. He and Stephanie McMahon have selected the new General Manager for tonight’s show, who we will meet later.

The new GM has made a bunch of matches tonight, including CM Punk against a free agent. As for Batista vs. Cena, it won’t be happening tonight, because Cena will be facing JBL and Kane. Oh and he can have Batista as a partner. Shane seemed a bit off here, speaking much more quietly and calmly than usual.

Santino Marella/Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly/D’Lo Brown

Before the match, Santino and Beth argued over who kissed whom last week but agreed to keep this strictly professional. The men start things off, with Santino saying he has this but getting his kick to the ribs blocked. Brown hits him with a rather hard clothesline and then knocks him into the corner off a right hand.

A missed charge lets Santino grab a neckbreaker though but he can’t manage a fireman’s carry. Instead Beth tags herself in and easily lifts Brown for a funny spot. Kelly comes in for some running forearms but Beth knees her down without much trouble. Santino wants in but misses an elbow, which does not sit well with Beth. Instead Santino grabs a rollup for the fast pin and the big celebration.

Post match we get a celebratory…handshake, but neither seem happy with that. Santino puckers up but gets glared at, only to have Beth grab him by the hair for a rather firm kiss of her own.

Shane McMahon looks at a picture of Vince McMahon when JBL interrupts to ask how Vince is doing. Shane ignores the question so JBL moves on to asking about the World Title. That’s something JBL needs to take up with the GM, but his question about Kane is cut off by a phone call from the new GM (and yes the ringtone is Shane’s theme song).

Raw Tag Team Titles: Jim Duggan/Jerry Lawler vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./Cody Rhodes

DiBiase and Rhodes are defending and Lawler comes out from the entrance rather than just getting up from commentary. Actually hold on though as the new General Manager has sent in a notice saying that Lawler will not be teaming up with Duggan, but there is a replacement.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Michael Cole/Jerry Lawler vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./Cody Rhodes

DiBiase and Rhodes are still defending and Cole is less than happy. After a break, Cole is on the apron (meaning no commentary, which is always weird) and Lawler naturally tells him that he’s going to do this on his own. DiBiase starts for the team and backs Lawler into the corner for a surprisingly clean break. It works so well that DiBiase does it again, but this time Lawler slaps him in the face to pick things up a bit.

DiBiase runs him over and hammers away before handing it off to Rhodes, who gets slapped as well. Lawler hammers Rhodes down in the corner but a middle rope dropkick gets Rhodes out of trouble. We hit the armbar but Lawler fights up and slugs away, as he is known to do. It’s way too early for the piledriver though and Lawler is sent into the corner…where Cole makes contact and that’s a tag. Rhodes sends Lawler outside so Cole actually hits him in the face, much to the fans’ delight. A hard clothesline retains the title.

Rating: C. This was much more of an angle than a match and that’s ok for something like this one. The new GM is apparently quite the villain, which should make for a bigger deal later tonight. If nothing else, DiBiase and Rhodes looked like the biggest villains in the world here, which is a good sign and better than they would have gotten out of Lawler and Duggan.

Post break Mike Adamle has taken over for Cole. Adamle says he was told to be here this week, suggesting that the GM had this planned in advance.

Here is Jamie Noble, with Layla, to say the new GM needs to pay attention to him. He wants to show off for Layla and prove that he’s the next Intercontinental Champion, so “Coffee” Kingston needs to get out here right now.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jamie Noble

Non-title. Noble hammers away to start and slams him down for two. Kofi is back up with the assortment of kicks into the Boom Drop, setting up a middle rope crossbody. Noble tries a fireman’s carry but gets caught with the spinning kick to the head to give Kingston the fast pin.

CM Punk vs. ???

Non-title, JBL is on commentary, and it’s……the returning William Regal, who is back from a Wellness suspension. Regal (in a sleeveless vest for a weird visual) grabs a headlock to start and takes Punk down. They go to the mat and Punk is rather overmatched. A jawbreaker gets Punk out of trouble and a leg lariat puts Regal down. Some knees in the corner just annoy Regal though and he hammers away, setting up a kick to the head against the post.

Back in and Punk (bleeding from the nose) gets taken down with Regal grinding a forearm into the jaw. Regal slowly forearms away and grabs a half nelson, which isn’t something you often see. Punk fights up and kicks away, including a hard one upside the head for two. A hard half nelson suplex drops Punk again, only to have him come back with the GTS for the fast pin.

Rating: B-. They were beating each other up out there and it was a fun match to see, even if it didn’t last long. You can imagine Punk being rather happy with getting to work with a veteran like Regal, who was probably happy to be back period. It was a nice return for Regal, who is always nice to have around.

Post match JBL gets in the ring so Punk is waiting on him, only for Kane to come out and drop JBL. Punk goes after Kane and gets taken down by JBL, who seems to come to an understanding with Kane.

Here are Chris Jericho and Lance Cade, for what is described as the final Highlight Reel. Jericho, in a suit, talks about how he has done something none of the fans here have done as he grew up. For years, he was seen as an entertainer and a party host for the new millennium. That is what he thought the fans wanted so he went along with it and even hosted his own talk show.

It was a pathetic mistake to pander to the fans and he was wrong to go that way. He will never settle for what the fans want again so tonight, the Highlight Reel is over. Before we go though, Jericho has a special tribute to a man whose career he personally ended. It’s not Shawn Michaels though, but rather Y2J. We see some clips of Jericho’s less than serious moments (a lot of which involves being mean to Stephanie McMahon) before Jericho asks if the fans miss that guy.

That footage embarrasses Jericho because he could have done that forever but no one would have ever respected him like Shawn Michaels. That made him realize he had to do something about it so he has given Michaels such a beating that he is gone forever. When he hurt Michaels, he hurt every one of the fans. Cade says he appreciates Jericho for taking him under his wing and saving him.

Jericho appreciates him as well, just like he appreciates how hard it is for Michaels to try to watch this show. He wants Michaels to listen to him for the first time ever: stay home and move on with your life. Enjoy life away from wrestling and move on, just like Jericho has. Speaking of which, he wants the Summerslam title match too. This was the really good evil Jericho and he has me wanting to see Michaels come back and get his revenge. Great stuff here.

Jim Ross joins commentary and has to correct Adamle from saying Survivor Series tickets will be on sale, because they will be “available”. That is a Vince line if I’ve ever heard one.

Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall

Non-title and Mickie’s dad is in the front row. Mickie starts fast and tries the hurricanrana but gets faceplanted for her efforts. Hall’s running flipping faceplant sets up something like a dragon sleeper, followed by some screeching. JR critiques Adamle’s move calling as Mickie fights back with a Thesz press and slugs away. The MickieDT finishes Hall rather quickly.

Post match Mickie goes to hug her dad but gets jumped by Katie Lea Burchill. Paul Burchill comes out as Katie says they’ll both be champions soon.

Todd Grisham can’t get Shane McMahon to reveal the GM, but whoever it is, they’re already here.

Summerslam rundown.

Jenny McCarthy still doesn’t like autism. Various celebrities agree.

Cryme Tyme have John Cena’s back for the main event but Batista comes in. Cena says he has this so Cryme Tyme leaves, with Batista telling Cena to stay out of his way. Then they aren’t sure who should go to the ring first.

Batista/John Cena vs. Kane/John Bradshaw Layfield

Cena and JBL start things off with JBL hammering him down to limited avail. Cena is right back with the Throwback for one and Batista tags himself in as JR is trying to figure out why he’s on the show this week. JBL’s forearm to the back doesn’t get him very far as Batista plants him with a powerslam. Kane makes the save so the villains are cleared out, leaving Batista and Cena to glare at each other as we take a break.

Back with JBL grabbing a swinging neckbreaker to put Cena down and handing it off to Kane. A basement dropkick and slam give Kane two each and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up so it’s back to JBL, who knocks Cena into the corner again. Cena fights up again (he does that a lot) and double clotheslines Kane down. The big tag brings in Batista to clean house including the spinebuster to JBL (Batista was polite enough to say “SPINEBUSTER” before he did it).

A low bridge takes Batista down though and Kane gets to come back in for a kick to the ribs. Kane stays on said ribs with a bodyscissors before it’s back to JBL to hammer away in the corner. Batista gets up again and spears JBL, who is right back with a big boot. Unfortunately JBL is also back with a right hand that hits Kane by mistake, meaning it’s time for some stalking. Cena uses the distraction to tag himself in and hit the AA to finish Kane.

Rating: C+. This got some time and felt like a big main event, though there is only so much interest in Batista and Cena as partners when they are likely to be fighting each other in a few weeks. Other than that you have Kane and JBL who are….well they’re not that interesting. There isn’t a big time heel at the moment and odds are that is going to be the GM, which doesn’t have the best track record.

Post match Shane McMahon comes out to announce that the new General Manager is….Mike Adamle. The fans are stunned into silence and it’s made even worse as he announces Cena vs. Batista for Summerslam. The staredown gets almost no reaction as the fans are stunned by the announcement to end the show. If that’s the best they’ve got, this show is in BIG trouble because the silence was almost scary after that announcement.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t a very good show in the first place and then it was made even worse by that terrible reveal at the end. I’m not sure how the best choice is the third show’s dorky/dumb announcer, but I don’t see this ending well. Maybe they have something better planned, but possibly the biggest match at Summerslam getting that kind of a reaction is a very telling sign. The rest of the show was hardly much better, with a bunch of lame stuff and nothing worth seeing. Pretty weak show here, and it isn’t giving me much hope going forward either.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 21, 2008
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

So it’s been a bit since I’ve been on these but I might as well at least get through Summerslam. The Great American Bash has wrapped up and the big story is that CM Punk is still the Raw World Champion after going to a double DQ with Batista. At the same time, he is probably also going to have to deal with Kane, who attacked Punk after the match, and John Bradshaw Layfield, who actually beat John Cena. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Great American Bash if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Great American Bash, or at least the main event scene on the Raw side.

Batista is in the production truck and doesn’t like the recap of Kane attacking him.

Opening sequence.

Here is a ticked off Batista to get things going. He planned on coming out here as the new World Heavyweight Champion but then Kane got involved to cost him that title match. Since the McMahons aren’t here now, he’s going to put himself in charge, meaning he’ll be getting a rematch for the title against CM Punk. If anyone has a problem with that….and here is JBL on the Titantron to interrupt.

JBL asks why Batista should get the World Title match when he lost last night. He is entitled to the next World Title shot, but Batista thinks JBL should come out here and discuss that idea. JBL is banged up though and it’s feeling that tonight…so here is CM Punk to interrupt. Punk doesn’t want to hear from JBL right now (JBL is aghast) because he isn’t happy with Kane either.

Punk wanted to prove that he was the better man last night against Batista….so let’s do it again tonight. JBL rants on the Titantron but Batista says cut his mic. Punk is on for the match against Batista, with the title on the line, tonight. There are a bunch of matches to be had out of here and that is certainly one of them.

Jenny McCarthy welcomes us to join her in the ring to fight autism on Saturday Night’s Main Event. Oh dear.

Here is Shawn Michaels……’ music, with Lance Cade coming out instead. Cade used to look up to him as his mentor, but then things changed. He wants Shawn out here right now to have some words but here is Paul London instead.

Lance Cade vs. Paul London

London slugs away to start and jumps over him in the corner but Cade is right back with a backbreaker. London’s back gets bent over Cade’s knee for a bit before Cade sends him ribs first into the post. The sitout Rock Bottom spinebuster finishes London in a hurry to complete what was more or less a squash.

Post match Cade says that since Michaels won’t come out here, we’ll have Chris Jericho come out instead. Jericho says Michaels isn’t coming out tonight and he won’t be coming back. We look at Jericho beating Michaels the previous night via stoppage due to Michaels’ eye being destroyed, complete with the big dramatic music.

Back in the ring, Jericho talks about how Michaels knew how bad things were going to be and got in the ring anyway because he had to take another chance. Jericho talks about all of Michaels’ injuries, including a detached retina, which means he will never be able to see properly again. The thing is though that when Michaels’ eye closed, Jericho’s opened instead. Michaels never mentored Jericho, and now he is happy with what he did last night. The lack of remorse here was rather good and that has some potential, especially whenever Michaels gets back.

Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly slips behind her to start and sweeps the leg but a rollup is easily blocked. Phoenix muscles her up for a slam and we hit something like a seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up and Kelly’s enziguri his shoulder, setting up the screaming headscissors. The handspring elbow is loaded up and quickly blocked though, setting up the Glam Slam for the pin.

Rating: C. This felt like it was more about Kelly getting in some offense instead of being wrecked by Beth, which was quite the surprise. Beth already beat Santino Marella last week so it is clear that she is in for something big, though Kelly certainly got a focus here. She has a lot of the tools already and if she can get the in-ring aspect down, it could go rather well for her.

Here is Jim Duggan for a chat. He isn’t going to take up much time, but he is thinking about hanging up his boots. Last week, Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes said this was a game for young men, and maybe his time has passed by. He wanted to come out here and say thank you, but Jerry Lawler cuts him off. There is no age limit around here and Duggan can keep going as long as he wants to. Duggan can do something that Barack Obama and John McCain would love to do: get people to stand up and cheer USA. Duggan seems to like that and says no, he doesn’t want to give it up.

Cue Rhodes and DiBiase, with the latter thinking this is amazing. Just because Lawler likes to date women younger than him, he doesn’t get to explain things. Rhodes says he was two and a half years old when Duggan won the Royal Rumble, but they weren’t even alive when Lawler slapped Andy Kaufman. Lawler demonstrates the slap and DiBiase has to hold Cody back. For now though, they can deal with this later, but watch what’s about to happen.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Cryme Tyme/John Cena

Both Cena and JBL are rather banged up after last night but they start things off….with JBL handing it off to Cody instead. Cena punches him in the face and gets two off the bulldog before stopping to glare at JBL. Gaspard comes in for two off an elbow and a rather hard clothesline in the corner.

It’s off to DiBiase, who is quickly suplexed for two as the one sidedness continues. JTG comes in but gets caught with a cheap shot, which is enough for JBL to come in for a change. The big shoulder drops JTG and it’s back to Cody for the bearhug. That’s broken up due to reasons of it’s Cody doing a bearhug but DiBiase comes in to cut off the tag.

A middle rope double stomp gets two and Cody adds a top rope knee to the ribs. DiBiase drops some elbows on the ribs and grabs a bodyscissors as the villains certainly have a target here. JTG finally fights up and hits a quick dropkick for a breather. Cody comes ni but misses a charge into the post, allowing the tag off to Cena to start the house cleaning. JBL bails through the crowd, leaving Cena to fireman’s carry both Cody and DiBiase at the same time. Cody gets tossed and the FU finishes DiBiase.

Rating: C+. The heat segment on JTG was pretty long but Cena coming in to smash people is always worth a glance. While I could have gone without one of the Tag Team Champions losing, getting pinned by Cena is hardly the end of a career. Cryme Tyme continues to do well as Cena’s friends and that is certainly better than what they had been doing.

Chris Jericho and Lance Cade are going to lave but run into Kane, who still has that mask.

Various celebrities support Jenny McCarthy’s autism charity, which is working with WWE.

Mickie James/Kofi Kingston vs. Paul Burchill/Katie Lea

Mickie knocks Katie into the corner to start so Burchill comes in for some glaring. Kingston high crossbodies him to break that up but Burchill hammers him down rather quickly. The leg cranking goes on for a bit before Kingston is up with a sunset flip for two. The women start brawling on the floor so Burchill breaks it up before ducking Trouble In Paradise, which hits the post. Back in and the Wicked Sister gives Burchill the pin.

Rating: C+. This had some nice high spots from Kingston but it was mainly there for Burchill to get the pin, likely setting up a title match. That could be fine for a one off match, though I’m not sure if Burchill is going to be the biggest threat. He’ll do for now though, even if Lea might not be so equal to James.

Jamie Noble is hitting on Layla when Batista comes in to ask if Noble has seen Kane. That’s a rather rude no, so Batista chokes Noble and says if he sees Kane, let him know that Batista is looking for him.

CM Punk says if he goes down, he’s going down swinging. JBL comes in to say he wants the World Title shot at Summerslam. He threatens to make Punk a transitional champion but Punk points out that he already beat JBL. Glaring ensues.

We look at Chris Jericho damaging Shawn Michaels’ eye again last night. It’s the same footage from earlier.

Here is Santino Marella for an open challenge. Well open to anyone but women that is.

Santino Marella vs. D’Lo Brown

Well there’s a surprise and cue Beth Phoenix to watch. Brown throws him into the corner and there’s a suplex to put him down again. A basement clothesline sets up the Low Down to give Brown the easy pin.

Post match Brown leaves so Phoenix gets in the ring and decks Marella. She wants a fight and they do a standing switch….then they stare at each other and kiss. As it tends to go.

Toby Keith doesn’t like autism, but he does like Jenny McCarty trying to fight autism.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. CM Punk

Batista is challenging…and here is Kane before the match gets started. The brawl is on, with Punk running in and getting beaten down as well. After some questions from the referee and the Big Match Intros, we’re ready to go. Punk’s headlock doesn’t last long as Batista kicks him in he face to take over.

Back up and Punk gets in a neckbreaker and kicks away for two. A drop toehold lets Punk take him down and hammer away as the fans don’t seem thrilled so far. Punk fires off some knees to the back and puts on a choke, which is broken up even faster. The Figure Four necklock goes on for a bit before Punk hits a running knee to the face for two more. The running knee into the bulldog gets two but Punk’s springboard clothesline is spinebustered out of the air. Batista fires off the shoulders in the corner and hits the spear, only for JBL to come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This really didn’t work and that might be because Punk was on offense for so much of it. Punk beating on Batista is only so easy to believe in the first place and it doesn’t help when he’s already presented as an underdog champion. On top of that, you had the fans waiting on what was likely going to be some kind of run in, so there was only so much reason to get into things here.

Post match John Cena runs in to go after JBL but hits Batista by mistake. Cena and Batista have to be held back and there’s Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C+. This show wasn’t so much about doing anything here but rather about setting the pieces up for later. You can pretty clearly see Batista vs. Cena being set up at the end, which leaves JBL to challenge Punk because we’re that lucky. Other than that we probably have another Jericho vs. Michaels match coming up, which makes for a heck of a top of the card on the Raw side. Not a great show here, but it has set the stage for the good ones later.

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Wrestlemania XXII
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s time for the biggest night of the year and this time around it has been rather fun. The Raw side has been a heck of a build while the Smackdown side has been hit and miss at best. This is one of the more forgotten Wrestlemanias (given that the image on the poster was of John Cena vs. Booker T., a match which hadn’t taken place in over a year at this point, you can kind of tell that they aren’t caring all that much) and it’s also the last one to date in a regular arena. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Eugene, Viscera, Goldust, Snitsky, Rob Conway, Tyson Tomko, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, Matt Striker, Super Crazy, Psicosis, Funaki, Steven Richards, Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, Animal, William Regal, Simon Dean

Half from Raw and half from Smackdown, so yes they are wearing the designated shirts. Dean tries to do his intro and gets kicked in the face for the immediate elimination. Richards gets rid of Conway and Funaki goes out as well. There goes Cade, followed by Goldust getting rid of Richards. Striker is out too and there go Crazy and Goldust as the ring is cleared out in a hurry. Snitsky gets rid of Regal and MNM dumps Eugene after a Snapshot.

We get the Raw vs. Smackdown showdown and Murdoch and Psicosis go out back to back. We’re down to Viscera, MNM, Snitsky, Tomko and Animal with Viscera and Animal being the targets for the other four. Viscera misses a charge in the corner but beats up MNM without much trouble. That means a double Visagra (Cole: “Melts in your mouth, not in your hand!” What in the world could that possibly mean in this context?) and Melina is nearly sick. It gets even worse as Viscera tosses MNM to get us down to four.

Snitsky kicks Tomko out by mistake and the LOD chants start back up. A big boot to Animal lets Viscera get rid of him, much to the crowd’s annoyance. Snitsky misses a running big boot though and Viscera wins without touching Snitsky at all. Cole: “I was hoping that would go on for another 15-20 minutes!” Tazz: “One of the best battle royals I’ve ever been a part of!” They’re bringing the Wrestlemania level snark this year.

Rating: D. Yeah this was horrible but the whole point was to get the undercard on the roster. I’m not sure on the logic of having the Chicago guy get all the way to the final three and then have him lose for the sake of Viscera, but I guess they don’t want a heel winning to open the show. Not that it would have mattered as it would have been one of the pops of the night, but it’s not worth getting annoyed about in the first place as it was a six minute battle royal before the feature presentation begins.

Post match Viscera kisses Lilian, who doesn’t seem thrilled.

Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child sings America the Beautiful. You know they’re getting in those American visuals every year and this is no exception.

The opening video looks at some great Wrestlemania moments over I Dare You by Shinedown. I like the song so this is a pretty good combination. They switch over to another song and the matches for this year’s show. That’s a nice mix that they tend to do well most years.

The posters of wrestlers around the top of the arena are a nice touch.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Carlito/Chris Masters vs. Big Show/Kane

Show/Kane are defending and we get the always awesome visual of the city set being on fire during Kane’s entrance. Masters shoulders Kane down to start as JR says this is the first tradition two on two tag match for these titles since Wrestlemania XV. How do you go that long without doing the normal version? Kane is back up with a leapfrog into a dropkick and it’s off to Show for the loud chops in the corner. A poke to the eye allows the tag off to Carlito, who gets a HECK of a reception (one of the loudest reactions I’ve ever seen for him), though Show throws both he and Masters around with ease.

Carlito gets gorilla pressed over the top onto Masters (seemingly elbowing him in the face on the way down) and Kane hits the top rope clothesline onto both of them. Back in and a double flapjack actually gets two on Show, with the replay showing a ram into an exposed buckle had something to do with it. Kane gets the tag so Show has to break up the Masterlock. Everything breaks down and Masters saves Carlito from the chokeslam. Masters hits Carlito by mistake when trying to save him again, meaning Kane can boot Masters to the floor. Not the chokeslam can hit Carlito to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. It was basically a more energetic Raw match and that works well enough for a Wrestlemania opener. I tend to like something like this more than some white hot match to open the show as it means you can go up from here. Carlito and Masters hadn’t been treated as threats to the title coming into the show so it makes sense for them to be little more than an annoyance here.

Post match, Carlito and Masters argue, with the fans being entirely behind Carlito. No violence ensues though.

Shawn Michaels, with a bandage on his head, says he doesn’t regret saying that Vince McMahon needed to grow up. Last year he and Kurt Angle tore the house down and the year before that, he did the same thing with Chris Benoit and HHH. Tonight, Shawn is going to be a different version of himself. Tonight, Vince McMahon needs to bow down and pray because Shawn is taking him to his own personal h***.

Matt Hardy vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Money in the Bank, allowing Cole to get in his first (to be fair in this case, minor) slip up of the night by saying Edge cashed in after John Cena’s Armageddon match. It’s a big brawl to start and the fans are behind Van Dam early on. Hardy goes for the first ladder but Van Dam takes him down with a slingshot dive onto the ladder onto Hardy for the crash. A ladder is bridged against the ropes so Shelton gets a running start for a huge flip dive to take down all of the young people.

Flair and Finlay fight in the ring (go on) but Matt comes in for the save with a superplex to bring Flair off the ladder (egads man). So Flair screams a lot and gets the X treatment (thanks to his knee), meaning we’re going to be down a person after about two and a half minutes. Lashley goes up top but Shelton grabs a sunset bomb. He can’t get Lashley down though so Finlay and Hardy go into the hurt business to bring Lashley crashing to the mat. Hardy crushes Finlay with the ladder in the corner until Finlay throws it back at him.

Finlay loads up the ladder but here’s Flair (after about three minutes away) to cut him off. Chops abound and Flair goes up again until Finlay makes the save with the Shillelagh, making Flair take another bump he shouldn’t be taking. The briefcase is swinging back and forth so Finlay can’t pull it down, allowing Shelton to go up as well. Lashley breaks that up and hits the Dominator on Benjamin, so Van Dam has to dropkick a chair into Lashley for the save.

Matt’s screaming legdrop from the ladder hits Lashley but he has to Side Effect Finlay off the ladder. Finlay gets knocked down as well though and Rob hits a splash off the very top of the ladder for the big crash. Van Dam goes up so Shelton does the always insane springboard onto the top of the ladder (because he can just do that) and hammers away. Matt brings in another ladder and climbs up to slug away at Shelton, who steps over to the other ladder. Rob shoves them both over for the big crash to the floor (always looks great) though and pulls down the briefcase to win.

Rating: B. This was good but not quite up to the standard that the big ladder matches have. It wasn’t all that long either and they didn’t have time to build much up. Shelton got in the big, impressive spots but there were enough high level bumps to go around. Van Dam and Flair were the only realistic winners here too so they picked one of the best options. Not as good as the others, but it still did what it was supposed to do.

New Hall of Famer Gene Okerlund is interrupted by Randy Orton, who doesn’t think much of someone who held a microphone for thirty five years. He promises to win the Smackdown World Title tonight but here’s Batista to say whoever leaves as champion is just holding it for him. Next year, he’s going to be champion at Wrestlemania XXIII.

It’s time for the Hall of Fame class, minus Bret Hart, who was not comfortable with appearing.

Gene Okerlund (No one did it better.)

Sensational Sherri (How was she not in already?)

Tony Atlas (He always seems happy to be around.)

Verne Gagne (Doesn’t mean anything directly to WWE, but you don’t have a wrestling Hall of Fame without him.)

William Perry (Sure, but he couldn’t get a suit? Or a tie? Or a shirt that tucked in?)

The Blackjacks (Again, how were they not in already?)

Eddie Guerrero (Yep.)

Vickie Guerrero looks rather overcome by the reception in a touching moment.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL, with Jillian Hall, is challenging and the ramp raises up so the limo can drive in. After commentary can manage to stop talking about Jillian’s cowgirl look, they bring up JBL wanting to prove that he can beat another great technical wrestler after Eddie Guerrero. They go straight to the slugout to start until Benoit drop toeholds him to try the Crossface. JBL is able to block it so Benoit headbutts him in the back of the head, which is a rather intense next step.

Some forearms to the neck keep JBL in trouble and a chop takes him down again. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter though and JBL bails to the floor to hide behind Jillian. Back in and JBL hammers him down in the corner until he misses a charge, allowing Benoit to roll the German suplexes. JBL crotches him on top though and hits the Eddie dance for some good mocking. The superplex brings Benoit down in a crash, allowing JBL to dance some more. He even hits two Amigos before having to boot Benoit in the face to cut off the comeback.

We hit the chinlock but Benoit fights up with more suplexes. The Swan Dive gets a close two but JBL blocks another Crossface attempt. He also blocks a German suplex with a grab of the rope and the referee, allowing him to….actually not cheat. Instead the Clothesline From JBL is countered into the Crossface, which is countered into a cradle (with a grab of the rope) to give JBL the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This has always been a bit of a weird one for me as JBL wasn’t exactly a hot challenger coming in but he did pick up the title, which reheated him in a hurry. He wasn’t going to make it back to the World Title anytime soon (or ever, as he didn’t need it), but he needed to win something instead of losing over and over again. This was good enough though and it’s hardly a stretch to see JBL win a match over Benoit.

We recap Edge vs. Mick Foley. Edge accused Foley of costing him the Raw World Title and wanted to beat him down, so Foley agreed to a fight. Foley wanted that one Wrestlemania moment and Edge is starting to realize that he might be in over his head.

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Hardcore match, Joey Styles joins commentary, Lita is here with Edge and Foley’s flannel shirt is buttoned up for a change. Edge has a bat to start but the early swings miss and Edge drops it to the floor. Foley slugs away in the corner and puts Edge in the Tree of Woe for the running elbow to the face. Lita throws in a metal sign though and it goes upside Foley’s head over and over. The spear hits early….and Edge is in a lot of pain, as Foley opens up the shirt to reveal a band of barbed wire wrapped around his stomach.

Foley cuts himself free and ties Edge in the ropes, meaning it’s time to grab the barbed wire bat. Lita tries for the save so it’s the Cactus Clothesline to Edge, sending all three outside in the process. Foley is certainly bringing it early on. A neckbreaker on the floor drops Edge and Foley pounds him down but his charge is hiptossed into the steps for a REALLY painful looking crash. There go Foley’s knees into the steps and it’s time for a chair. Edge loads up a table on the floor but Foley rolls off before Edge can come off the top.

Instead Edge slams him head first into the steel ramp (for a SICK thud)….and it’s time for the lighter fluid. Edge covers Foley in the fluid but gets piledriven for two. Foley grabs the chair but a Lita distraction lets Edge hit a DDT. Foley is busted and the barbed wire bat to the head makes it even worse. It’s time for the thumbtacks but Foley slams Edge (with no shirt) down onto them for the really big reaction.

A barbed wire Mandible Claw goes on and now it’s Edge being hit with the barbed wire bat over and over. Now it’s time for Foley to spray the table with lighter fluid but Lita hits Foley in the knee with the barbed wire bat. The table is set on fire and Edge hits the spear through the ropes and through the fire for the pin.

Rating: A. What is there to say about this? They massacred each other and Foley bled all over the place before taking a huge bump to end the match. This was a different side of Edge and it’s the side that needed to be shown to make him feel like more than a flash in the pan. This felt like two people wanting to hurt each other and then getting to do so, as Foley continues to know how to make someone into a much bigger star than almost anyone else.

Edge and Lita looking like they’re in physical shock after the match makes it a lot better.

Some fans won tickets to the show from Snickers.

Booker T./Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

Booker makes Sharmell start, jumps Boogeyman from behind, and then comes in to hammer on Boogeyman. The comeback doesn’t take long and Booker is sent into the post. Boogeyman eats some worms and stares at Sharmell for trying a staff shot to the back. Sharmell gets kissed with the worms and runs off, leaving Boogeyman to chokebomb Booker for the pin.

Rating: F. Of course this is a failure as there isn’t anything to be praised here. It was the three of them doing a short, bad match and the big deal was Sharmell getting a mouth full of worms. There isn’t much else to it than that and the fact that this aired at Wrestlemania at any point after about 1991 tells you why it’s a failure.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James for the Women’s Title. Mickie is a psycho who was obsessed with Trish (they never said the word lesbian but that’s what they were going for) but Trish wasn’t interested. Once Mickie was flat out turned down, she completely snapped and decided to take the Women’s Title instead. This feels like a big fight and that’s a good thing around here.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending. They fight over a lockup to start as JR tries to diagnose Mickie’s mental state. The Thesz press (JR: “Maybe the Louise Thesz press.”) puts Mickie down but she comes back with a kick, only to be thrown into the splits. A baseball slide puts Mickie on the floor but Trish kicks the post by mistake. Mickie wraps the leg around the post in a smart move and there’s a dropkick to the knee to make it worse.

The fans get behind Mickie and she wraps the leg around the ropes. The half crab goes on before it’s time to stomp on the leg in the corner. Mickie stops to soak in the cheers and bends the leg some more. This time Trish reverses into the spinning anklescissors but the fans aren’t happy with the comeback. The Stratusphere is countered with another slam of the leg to the mat as Lawler notices that Mickie’s skirt isn’t the most functional in a match.

Trish comes back with a Stratusfaction attempt but Mickie grabs her between the legs (on the Network) and licks her own hand (not on the Network) as JR loses it. Mickie tries the Stratusfaction but she either leaves it short or Trish can’t hold her on the knee, meaning they botch it horribly (also not on the Network). Mickie settles for the Chick Kick for the pin and the title. JR: “THE NUT JOB HAS WON THE TITLE!”

Rating: B-. This was getting really good near the end but then the botch happened and it stopped everything cold. The leg stuff was good and while it would have made more sense to have Trish’s knee give out when she was trying the Stratusfaction, it worked for a story in the match as Mickie knew how to break the thing down. More importantly though, Mickie FINALLY ends Trish’s year long plus reign and becomes the new star, which is long overdue. They needed to have the title change here as Trish had run out of gas a long time ago but it wasn’t like she had anyone good enough to drop it to.

Vince McMahons has the rest of the family drop to their knees in prayer before his match with Shawn. Vince: “God, let’s face it. I don’t like you, and you don’t like me.” Vince praises his own physique and promises to end Shawn.

Mark Henry vs. Undertaker

Casket match and the druids take their time wheeling the casket to ringside. Undertaker does the full entrance and Henry manages to keep glaring at him before jumping him to start things off. Some running clotheslines don’t do much to Henry so he runs Undertaker over with a single shot. They head outside with both guys going head first into the steps. The fans are in am ore traditional role here with the Undertaker cheers, which are cut off when Henry blocks Old School.

A low blow saves Undertaker from going into the casket and now it’s time to go after the arm. Old School connects this time but he still can’t get Henry down. Henry runs him over again but misses the running crotch attack and gets dropped into the casket. Undertaker follows him in and the lid closes before opening up with Undertaker’s hand around Henry’ throat.

They get back inside with Henry hitting the World’s Strongest Slam and covering because he isn’t that bright. Speaking of not that bright, Henry hammers away in the corner but gets planted with the Last Ride. Undertaker throws him onto and over the casket, setting up the Taker Dive (which barely clears the casket). Back in and a pretty impressive Tombstone lets Undertaker put him in the casket for the win.

Rating: D. Another one which didn’t work so well, mainly because there was no drama. Who was believing that Mark Henry was going to be the one to break the Streak? The Taker Dive and Tombstone both looked great but there isn’t much of a way around the fact that it was Mark Henry trying to break the Streak. It had no drama and wasn’t even that long, leaving this near the bottom end of the Streak (at least once it became a big deal).

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon. Shawn told Vince that it was time to get over the Montreal Screwjob and grow up so Vince decided to destroy Shawn once and for all. He has done a great job of making Shawn miserable and now it is time for Shawn to FINALLY get his hands on Vince in a no holds barred match.

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

No Holds Barred and there is a big framed copy of Vince’s Muscle and Fitness Magazine at ringside. Shawn jumps him to start and sends him into JR as the WE WANT BRET chants begin. The framed magazine goes around Vince’s head and Shawn is all ticked off. Cue the Spirit Squad to beat Shawn down though and hit the five man toss into the air. JR: “Someone get the hook!” Shawn gets their megaphone (which is smoking/powdery for some reason) and beats them down though, which sends them off for some reason.

Vince, now bleeding above the eye, gets in a clothesline to take over and it’s time to choke in the corner. The leather belt rips Shawn’s back up and it’s time to choke. Vince actually tunes up the band but Shawn blocks the kick (which had height but was nowhere near the right form) and hammers away. JR: “How are your stock dividends now???” The top rope elbow connects but here’s Shane with a kendo stick to take Shawn down. Always one to rub it in, Vince drops his pants but Shawn puts Shane’s face into it instead, followed by a low blow to Vince.

A clothesline puts Shane on the floor but that’s not enough, as Shawn handcuffs Shane to the rope. The Shane dance sets up a bunch of kendo stick shots to Shane and there’s a heck of a chair shot to Vince’s head. Lawler: “CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!” Vince is busted open and Shawn tunes up the band….before stopping cold. Instead he goes outside and grabs a ladder, which goes straight into Vince’s forehead.

Shawn still won’t cover as he grabs some trashcans and a table instead, even shoving Shane away to get to them. The trashcan to the head drops Vince again and Shawn goes up the ladder. Then he climbs back down and pulls out the BIG ladder. Shawn climbs again, does the suck it sign, and elbows Vince through the table for the huge crash. Medics bring a stretcher out but Shawn scares them off, stands Vince up, yells a lot, and finishes with the superkick.

Rating: C+. Of course it’s junk as an actual match, but this was exactly what they set it up to be. There is no reason to believe that Vince can hang with Shawn in a regular match so he didn’t really come close. Vince brought in a bunch of people, Shawn beat them up and then the beating began. Shawn destroyed him completely (or at least until the next night on Raw, or maybe a week later if they’re feeling generous) and it made sense. Might have gone a little long, but it was the logical way to go.

Post match Vince is taken out on a stretcher and still flips Shawn off. Cole talks about how Shawn promised to never go back to his old self but did it here. Not exactly, as it was just Shawn being violent and aggressive, which isn’t quite what they were talking about on the way here.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle for the Smackdown World Title. Rey won the Royal Rumble to earn the title shot but Orton talked enough trash to get him to put the shot on the line at No Way Out. Orton cheated to win, but Teddy Long put Rey in the match too, making it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending and POD plays Rey, in an Aztec warrior costume this year, to the ring. Orton jumps Angle with the belt before the bell to start but Angle is right back in with a German suplex to Orton, plus a double German to both of them at once (with Rey flying through the air). An overhead belly to belly takes Orton over as well but Rey sends Angle face first into Orton’s crotch.

Angle is fine enough to send Rey up for a super hurricanrana to Orton before throwing Rey outside. Rey breaks up the ankle lock attempt and kicks Angle in the head for two as the fans are split between Rey and Kurt. The 619 is countered into the ankle lock and Rey taps (less than four minutes in) but the referee is with Orton. The German suplexes take down both challengers and an Angle Slam to the floor drops Rey in a heap. That means an ankle lock to Orton but this time Rey grabs the referee so he can’t see a tap.

Rey Drops the Dime on Angle but gets knocked outside again. The RKO connects for a delayed two on Angle and Randy goes up top, earning himself the running belly to belly superplex. Rey is back in with the springboard seated senton for two more on Angle and Orton is back in to kick Angle to the floor. The powerbomb neckbreaker gets two on Rey but the RKO takes too long, allowing Angle to come back in with the Angle Slam on Orton. Rey slips out of the Angle Slam and armdrags Angle to the floor. That leaves Orton to be dropkicked into the ropes for the 619 into the West Coast Pop for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This is still one of the more perplexing big matches in Wrestlemania history as it had no real structure other than them doing moves to each other. Nothing was built up, nothing set up the finish and Rey just pinned Orton to win. It was fine as it was, but I was expecting a lot more, including more time as it didn’t even last ten minutes.

Post match the Guerreros come out to celebrate with Rey.

JR and the King talk about HHH and John Cena being ready for tonight. They needed two minutes for this instead of the other World Title match? Ah right: they needed to put a bed and pillows in the ring. Great way to use the Wrestlemania time.

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

It’s the annual Playboy match pillow fight so JR talks about Frank Gotch gate records in Chicago during the entrances. They to to the bed to start and then hit the catfighting. Torrie turns the bed over on her and then puts her dog on Candice’s face. Candice loses her dress and then puts on a headscissors over the ropes while bending backwards over the ropes. A middle rope elbow hits Torrie on the bed and it’s time to cut Torrie out of her dress. Candice pulls out her Playboy but gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D-. Yeah this happened and that’s about all there is to say about it. They were there to promote Playboy and it worked well enough, even though the Playboy Diva is usually a face and someone who wins but not quite this time around. It wasn’t exactly a match of course, but why would you expect anything else?

We see clips of the Wrestlemania press conference, with HHH saying the match against John Cena will be easy and Cena saying not so fast. HHH won a tournament to get the shot so there isn’t much of a story.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and HHH, sitting on a throne in a Thor/Conan motif (the announcers say Conan but he had a big hammer), rises out from the stage. Cena on the other hand comes out after a gangster video and following an old car, complete with CM Punk as a machine gun toting gangster in one of the more well known Before They Were Famous cameos. Still as close as he ever got to the Wrestlemania main event. We get an old school weapons check as JR puts over the idea of the grunt vs. the seasons, trained professional to give us a good story to the match.

They fight over the arm control to start and Cena is sent into the corner for some frustration. The fans are almost entirely behind HHH here, or at least the loud ones are. The FU doesn’t work and they stare each other down again. Cena is sent outside for a big cheer but he comes back in to slug away. A backdrop gives Cena two and the fisherman’s suplex gets the same.

We’re already into the chinlock as the fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. There’s the big whip over the corner to send HHH to the floor and another backdrop puts him on the ramp. Back in and HHH hits the jumping knee for a positive reaction as commentary keeps talking about the crowd reactions. HHH whips him hard into the steps and the fans even pop for him breaking the count.

Back in again and the facebuster into a running clothesline gets two on Cena, with JR calling it a slobberknocker. A pair of neckbreakers gets two more and we hit the neck crank. HHH switches to a sleeper and then a chinlock as JR gets the World Title wrong and has to apologize to Rey Mysterio. Cena fights up and hits his own clothesline before winning the slugout. There’s a powerslam and Cena initiates the finishing sequence but the Shuffle is countered with a spinebuster for two more. Another sleeper is countered into a belly to back suplex and it’s the Shuffle into the STFU.

HHH finally makes the rope and escapes the FU before sending Cena into the referee in the corner. That means a low blow to both of them, meaning HHH can give us the crotch chop. It’s sledgehammer time and Cena is knocked silly for a delayed two. The FU gets the same and the fans are popping hard on these near falls. Cena misses a high crossbody so HHH tries the Pedigree but Cena pulls him into the STFU, even trapping the arm so HHH can’t make the rope. It takes some time but HHH finally taps and Cena retains.

Rating: A-. That’s the ultimate achievement on Raw and the win that Cena really needed to become THE guy. He had been champion for almost a year straight but still felt somewhat like someone who hadn’t made it all the way to the top yet. Cena had been the guy, but he wasn’t THE guy until this one and that’s a big change.

The match itself was great as you would expect from these two on the big stage. They played up the idea that Cena was in over his head but ground out another win as he tends to do. Cena was getting better at the big matches around this point and of course that would become one of his calling cards down the line. This worked well and felt like a Wrestlemania main event as the company is now Cena’s, which is what matters most.

The celebration and five minute highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. Just like it did in the buildup, Raw annihilated Smackdown here with the two matches that made the show and a lot of other good stuff in between (plus winning Money in the Bank). Edge vs. Foley and the main event certainly deliver, but the rest of the show isn’t anything great. There are some really bad parts on here but the rest is good enough. That may sound good, but I’d like a little more than “good enough” for Wrestlemania.

The biggest problem here is that there really aren’t many blow away moments. Cena winning was more of a long term deal, Rey winning the title felt more like Eddie’s big farewell, Money in the Bank is all about the future and Trish finally losing is hardly top tier stuff. Shawn getting the win against Vince was nice to see, but that middle finger after the match doesn’t make it seem like a blowoff. The problem here is Smackdown, as there wasn’t much of note other than Rey’s title win. It was a one sided show between the two brands and when the show is built around both, it doesn’t work so well, Good, but forgettable.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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