Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2
Date: April 6, 2018
Location: Pontchartrain Convention & Civic Center, Kenner, Louisiana
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Denver Colorado, Emil J

I’ve done parts of this series before so I figured I might as well knock off the rest of them. This show features a match that I’ve always wanted to see as it started one of the strangest comeback stories in wrestling history. Other than that, we’re in for a total mess and that is absolutely by design. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is designed after what looks to be a 16 bit video game, with Joey Janela and Glacier going after Marty Jannetty on the streets….where Jannetty lights Dink on fire to clear the stage. The second stage features Janela and Jannetty shooting at a Barber Shop (which can shoot back). With the shop destroyed, Shawn Michaels pops out of a DeLorean and superkicks Jannetty. That was different.

James Ellsworth is in a toy store and talks about working in WWE before coming here in his return to the independent scene. Tonight he’s ready to fight Matt Riddle, who doesn’t think much of Ellsworth.

Nick Gage music video. Is this just a really long pre-show?

David Starr talks about what wrestling has done for him and tonight, he’s ready for Mike Quackenbush. This is a really long pre-show isn’t it?

Quackenbush is in, and says so to Starr’s face.

Video on the Great Sasuke vs. Joey Janela, the show’s main event.

There’s going to be a Clusterf*** Battle Royal.

We start the series of videos from the beginning again as I guess we’ve got some time to kill before the show starts.

After 24 minutes of the videos looping, we’re ready to go, meaning we get to hear the commentators getting ready for the show and going over the match order.

The opening video is modeled after the WWF Attitude Era intro.

We open with a video on Joey Janela, which is basically a recreation of The Wrestler.

Teddy Hart vs. KTB vs. Tony Deppen vs. Eli Everfly vs. Gringo Loco vs. DJZ

One fall to a finish and DJZ would go on to become Joqauin Wilde in WWE. It’s a brawl to start (duh) with Everfly being sent outside. Deppen clears the ring but gets anklescissored down by Loco. Everfly is back in to snap off a headscissors before he and Loco come to a standoff. Hold on though as DJZ is back with his air horn but gets cleared out again. Hart walks on KTB’s back before pulling him into a sunset flip for two.

A torture rack backbreaker sends Deppen outside and a Project Ciampa hits Everfly. With a helping hand from the referee, Hart moonsaults onto a bunch of people on the floor. KTB dives onto everyone (Hart doesn’t go down) and Everfly hits a dive of his own. Back in and a springboard tornado DDT plants KTB and a super hurricanrana gives Everfly two on Loco. KTB comes off the top to dive onto everyone but Hart, who DDTs KTB down.

A Lionsault misses for KTB and Loco hits a springboard cutter to bring him down again. DJZ is back up and sunset bombs Loco into a moonsault onto KTB before hitting them both with a rolling DDT. Everfly hurricanranas Hart to the floor and takes Deppen up top for a…..super flipping Jay Driller (commentary: “He can’t do that!”) and the pin at 11:06.

Rating: B-. I’m not big on scrambles like this one, but there is something to be said about doing this kind of acrobatics and flips all over the place. It was certainly a fun match and the right way to fire up the crowd to start the show. Everfly’s finisher was completely nutty, making it perfect for a show like this one. Very fun stuff here and believe it or not, the fans loved it.

James Ellsworth vs. Matt Riddle

Ellsworth’s intergender title isn’t on the line (and I’m assuming Riddle’s unidentified title isn’t either). Ellsworth chop blocks him from behind before the bell but Riddle snaps off a gutwrench suplex to drop him as well. Fans: “WHERE’S YOUR CHIN?” Riddle hits a running forearm in the corner and the backsplash makes it worse. Riddle’s running knee just misses….because Ellsworth doesn’t have a chin. A superkick gives Ellsworth one but another is countered into the Bromission to give Riddle the win at 3:38.

Rating: C. Well yeah, what were you expecting? This was always going to be total destruction and it shouldn’t have been anything else. Ellsworth was always a joke and that’s how he was treated here, with Riddle, the indy prodigy, running through him. The missed knee was funny and then Riddle finished him off, as he should have done. That’s oddly logical from a show like this but I’ll take it.

Ellsworth flips off the crowd on the way out in a nice touch.

The ring announcer is ready to introduce the next match and….Virgil interrupts? He calls someone out (the audio isn’t exactly clear), gets no one, and leaves.

PCO vs. Walter

PCO isn’t the monster just yet. Before the match, Walter offers a chance to walk out but PCO gives him a crotch chop and we’re ready to go. They circle each other to start and PCO takes him into the corner for some taps to the chest. Walter works on the arm and gets kicked away without much trouble. PCO knocks him outside and loads up the dive, only to get run over with a shoulder.

The chop off ensues until Walter grabs a slam and sits on his chest. Some choking on the ropes keeps PCO down but he chops his way out of trouble. A kick to the head and short DDT put Walter down and it’s time to head outside. PCO loads up the first table but takes too long and gets dropped down onto the apron. Walter blocks a powerbomb off the apron and sends PCO hard into the steps, but the big chop only hits post.

As he’s a bit off, PCO goes up top and moonsaults down onto Walter and the referee for the big triple knockdown. Granted there was almost no length to the dive so it’s a wonder that he hit the two of them as well as he did. Walter is up first and powerbombs PCO through the table before doing it again (sans table) inside.

The second referee comes in for the two count so PCO gets booted in the face. The chops just wake PCO up though and he opens his own shirt so Walter can chop him again. PCO wins a chop off and the fans are actually on their feet as Walter looks scared. A discus forearm puts Walter on the floor for a suicide dive and a running flip dive takes him down again.

Back in and a super hurricanrana gives PCO two but Walter flips him over with a release German suplex. PCO is right back with a Regal Roll into a split legged moonsault for two (and another standing ovation). Back up and PCO hits a top rope Swanton to finally put Walter away at 18:29.

Rating: B+. Oh yeah this was rather awesome as it was all about two big guys beating each other up and hitting each other really hard. Walter was already a big deal but this would be a nice boost to his career. At the same time, it kicked off one of the most improbably career resurgences as PCO would turn this into an incredible second act to his career. It’s easy to see why too, as this was just hard hitting pain for the sake of beating on each other, with those chops making my skin crawl.

Post match they trade another chop each and shake hands before Walter leaves.

GCW World Title: Penta El Zero M vs. Nick Gage

Gage is defending and swears a lot before the bell. We get a CERO MIEDO vs. MDK chant off until Gage knocks him outside. The dive is cut off with a chair to the head and Penta chairs him again for a bonus. Penta’s chop hits the post though (with commentary pointing out that it’s two matches in a row) but is fine enough to grab some doors. Gage hiptosses him through a door in the corner and grabs a Falcon Arrow for two.

The boot scrape is cut off though and Penta Death Valley Drivers him through another door. A piece of the door over the head rocks Gage again and Penta puts some pieces onto Gage onto a table. The backsplash off the barricade doesn’t put Gage through said table in a nasty crash. Back in and Penta bridges a door over some chairs and Pentagon Drivers him through the door for two. Penta sets up another similar structure but gets powerbombed off the ropes through it instead. The chokebreaker retains Gage’s title at 9:27.

Rating: D+. This felt like a match where the idea was “Gage vs. this guy” and they didn’t have any more thought put into it. Gage didn’t do much of anything here and then retained in the end after Penta had done so much. That didn’t make for an interesting or even fun match from the usual freak show standards, so this was kind of a wreck.

Respect is shown post match. Penta leaves and Gage yells at the fans, who don’t seem to like him. Then he high fives a bunch of fans on the way out so he’s quite an odd duck.

Mike Quackenbush vs. David Starr

Starr does his long introduction and commentary (featuring Walter for this match) will not shut up, saying no one cares what Starr has to say. They fight over arm control to start until Starr gets two off a Thesz press. Back up and they shake hands before Mike climbs the rope and armdrags him into a leglock which he rolls over for what appeared to be a Crossface attempt, sending Starr to the rope.

Mike stomps on the foot and sweeps the leg, setting up some double knees to the ribs. The abdominal stretch goes on and even Walter is impressed by the series of twists it took for Mike to get it on. With that broken up, Starr Death Valley Drivers him into the corner twice in a row, followed by a springboard clothesline to the floor. Starr doesn’t want the countout so he throws Mike back in and gets tossed off the top for his efforts.

A Swanton gives Mike two but his hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb for two. Starr kicks him in the head for two, which has Walter wanting Mike to win because Starr is “acting like a d***.” A nice tornado DDT sends Starr outside but the big dive is cut off, with Starr driving him into the apron. Back in and Mike grabs a double arm crank but Starr slips out and blasts him with a clothesline for the pin at 11:37.

Rating: B-. This was the technical match of the night so far, with Starr being just enough of a villain to make it a little uneven. What mattered here was getting in something different on the show and they made it work. These two worked well together and you could hear Walter being impressed on commentary so there had to be something to this one.

Commentary: “Walter is it fair to say that the better man won?” Walter: “No.” Starr grabs the mic and puts Mike over before saying how glad he was for being on this show.

Clusterf*** Battle Royal

This is a Royal Rumble with pinfalls, submissions and over the top eliminations, though the entrance intervals are going to be shaky at best. We see some people in the back trying to check into the match, including MJF in a blonde wig disguise. Jimmy Lloyd is in at #1 and Session Moth Martina (she likes beer) is in at #2. Martina dances a lot and gets kissed for her efforts as Orange Cassidy (still just an indy guy and not a phenomenon yet) is in at #3.

Cassidy takes so long to come in that Wheeler Yuta (looking about 17 years old) comes in at #4 and Curt Stallion comes in at #5 for the grapple off. Yuta rolls him up for two and it’s Facade in at #6 to strike away at Stallion. Facade sends him outside and adds a rope walk moonsault onto everyone outside (as no one has been eliminated yet). Back in and a running kick to the head pins Stallion for our first elimination. Swoggle is in at #7 and snaps off some German suplexes.

With Swoggle cleaning house, Grado is in at #8 and he seems immune to German suplexes. Apparently Grado is quite intoxicated and Kikutaro is in at #9 and crotches himself while trying Old School. As some other wrestlers come back in….the Invisible Man is in at #10. House is cleaned and Kikutaro is tossed before Swoggle taps to a Fujiwara armbar. Joe Gacy is in at #11 and slugs it out with Yuta, including the handspring cutter. Bryan Idol is in at #12 and gets to clean some house before Chris Dickinson, in a mask, smoking a cigarette, and coming out to Real American, knocks out Facade.

Gacy is tossed and Yuta is Razor’s Edged out onto the pile (some are still in, some aren’t) at ringside. Dickinson hits Hulk Hogan’s finishing sequence to get rid of Grado and is left alone (I think). Dan Severn is in at #13 and they go with the grappling (after issues at yesterday’s Bloodsport). Alabama Doink (sure) is in at #14 and gets tossed by Severn, who is eliminated by Dickinson. Rickey Shane Page is in at #15 and beats up Dickinson….as well as the still in Lloyd.

With that not working, Marcus Crane comes in at #16 and gets beaten up by Dickinson. Aeroboy (a masked luchador with another masked man apparently named Crazy Boy….who looks like Excalibur) is in at #17 and starts cleaning house, with a Swanton into a double pin getting rid of Dickinson. Rory Gulak (or Drew, according to the rather drunk commentary team) is in at #18 and doesn’t like the idea of the match (with the sign to prove it). Nate Webb is in at #19 and walks through the crowd as Rory beats people up inside.

Everyone gets out of the ring as the fans sing Webb’s song. After taking over the camera, Webb gets inside and plants Gulak with something like a spinning Big Ending for the elimination. Ethan Page is in at #20 so Gulak kicks him in the head. That earns Webb a trip into the corner and it’s MJF (no wig) in at #21.

The masked men go after Page and MJF, with the villains tossing out the luchadors. With them gone, MJF Codebreakers Page into a rollup for the elimination. Martina (hey she’s still in this) comes back in and puts a condom on her face for a Mandible Claw on Page. She also wraps her legs around MJF’s hand for the female version of Joey Ryan’s penis suplex. Then Page rolls her up for the elimination. Cassidy finally gets in for the lazy strikes (the fans approve) and a double chokeslam pus the villains down.

That lets Cassidy go up….and fall off the top so MJF and Page can pin him at the same time. The Invisible Man beats both of them up until Lloyd gives him a piledriver…..which is illegal in Louisiana so Lloyd is eliminated. Page and MJF double team Webb for a double two count so they beat up referee Bryce Remsburg. That results in a beating from Remsburg, who gets sent outside.

Mikey Whipwreck is in at #22 (oh yeah this is a battle royal) and beats the villains up until MJF elbows him in the face. The Whippersnapper (Stunner) sends Page into a spinning faceplant from Webb for the pin and we’re down to….however many are still in this thing. MJF shoves Mikey off the ropes and hits a splash for the pin. A poke to the eye stuns Webb and MJF throws him out….but the Invisible Man rolls MJF up for the win at 39:38.

Rating: D. This right here? It was dumb. I get the idea of having a bunch of people involved and all that jazz but my goodness did this not hold my interest. I’m sure the live crowd (plus a lot of alcohol) really enjoyed it but it was a bunch of indy stars coming in, doing a little something and then moving on. It’s also one of those battle royals where it is virtually impossible to keep track of who is in there and who isn’t as people will stand outside for such long stretches. These things can be fun, but this didn’t have any big surprises or cool moments, leaving it as something that just kept going.

Joey Janela vs. Great Sasuke

Penelope Ford, in a Mardi Gras mask, is here with Janela. Sasuke comes to the ring with what looks like holy water to bless fans. A quick takedown doesn’t get either of them very far so they go to a grappling sequence with Janela twisting the fingers around. Sasuke nips up though and sits in the middle of the ring, which has Janela worried. Back up and Sasuke…apparently hypnotizes Janela and then spins his hand around, causing Janela to flip himself over.

Sasuke puts him in a chair at ringside and loads up a ladder, only to be whipped into it instead. Back up and Sasuke sends him flying off the top and onto the table for a nasty crash. Sasuke brings it back inside and puts Janela on the ladder for a missed Swanton, leaving Sasuke’s heck caught in said ladder. Janela grabs an inflatable alligator to crush Sasuke before loading up six chairs back to back.

With Janela going up top, Sasuke powerbombs him down onto the chairs in one of those STOP DOING THAT bumps. Sasuke hits him in the head with a door and then whips him through another in the corner. They slug it out on the apron and there’s a Death Valley Driver to plant Sasuke (Janela: “F*** YOU JIM CORNETTE!”). With Sasuke in a chair at ringside, Janela misses a top rope flip dive, only hitting the chair instead.

Janela is laid on a table and a big running flip dive drives him through it, which draws in Ford. A dance distracts Sasuke and Janela grabs a figure four. Sasuke gets to the rope, which rightly has commentary asking “IN THIS MATCH?” Janela misses a moonsault and gets laid over another table at ringside, allowing Sasuke to try and put a trashcan over himself and climb up.

This proves rather difficult (as you might have guessed) so he just throws it at Janela instead, setting up a Swanton onto Janela onto the table for the huge crash. Back in and Janela gets two (as Sasuke is mostly dead) but can’t believe the kickout. A Michinoku Driver onto the side of the ladder gives Janela two more, followed by a top rope double stomp onto a chair onto Sasuke for the pin at 25:16.

Rating: D+. To say this just kept going would be an understatement. It turned into little more than a hardcore brawl and that isn’t the most thrilling thing to see. Sasuke did a bunch of flips, but it didn’t exactly feel like a special match. Chop this in half and have some more wrestling and it’s much better, but it didn’t work for the most part, mainly due to the length and feeling like an indy street fight.

Post match Janela puts Sasuke over huge and thanks the fans, talking about how he can’t believe all this happened. Sasuke gets in a quick thank you of his own and they do a quick karaoke version of It’s My Life by Bon Jovi (sure) to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show where it depends on your viewing location. Watching this live in person would have been a blast, though watching it back at home just doesn’t work so well. The Quackenbush vs. Starr and PCO vs. Walter matches are both good (the latter being very good) but the rest of the show is mostly skippable. These shows would get better, but it took some time to get the formula of “fun indy show” down. For now, it isn’t quite working yet, but it could have been a lot worse. Just kind of a not great show that went on too long.

 

 

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Evolve #1
Date: January 16, 2010
Location: Rahway Events Center, Rahway, New Jersey
Attendance: 500
Commentators: Leonard F. Chikarason, Lenny Leonard

So a good chunk of the Evolve library has been put up on the Network and since the whole thing is being blown up for the sake of Peacock sooner than later, I figured I would take a look at one of their shows. This is the promotion’s debut event so there is not likely to be much in the way of storylines. Let’s get to it.

Kyle O’Reilly is warming up when Davey Richards gets annoyed at the cameras. They’re here to film everything for a documentary but Davey and manager Tony Kozina throw them out anyway. Davey Richards being really serious? Stunning indeed.

Akira Tozawa and Kota Ibushi have a chat that I can’t understand.

Opening sequence, mainly featuring clips from Full Impact Pro.

Various people talk about why they wrestle, with one of them saying he would be dead if he didn’t.

Kyle O’Reilly vs. Bobby Fish

O’Reilly has Tony Kozina with him. They trade kicks to the legs to start and then fight over the wrist, which the fans appreciate. Back up and Fish nails a dropkick and avoids a charge to send O’Reilly shoulder first into the rope. The big dive takes him down and it’s back inside for a t-bone suplex to send O’Reilly flying again. A top rope headbutt gives Fish two but O’Reilly knees his way to freedom. O’Reilly is back with the rolling butterfly suplexes for two of his own and it’s time to trade the hard kicks.

Fish kicks him down into a cross armbreaker, sending O’Reilly straight into the ropes. More big kicks rock O’Reilly but he counters one into a reverse fisherman’s suplex for two of his own. Fish hits a superkick but walks into a discus lariat for the double knockdown. O’Reilly is back up with a tornado DDT for no cover so Fish grabs a Falcon Arrow for his own two. Back up and O’Reilly hits another tornado DDT into a brainbuster for the pin at 6:35.

Rating: C+. This was a good way to start things off as it was all action and the kind of match that an audience like this would appreciate. If nothing else, it was bizarre to see these two looking so young but that’s the point of an opener like this. It was a hard hitting indy style match and that’s what it should have been in this spot.

Chuck Taylor vs. Cheech

No transition between the match and no entrances, which makes the show move a lot faster. Cheech was a regular on the independent scene around this time and Taylor would get more famous later on. This is an official qualifying match for the Evolve singles division. They start fast with Cheech hitting a shoulder but Taylor sidesteps a dropkick.

Cheech takes him down without much trouble and grabs something like a Sharpshooter where he sits down on the leg rather than pulling it back. That lets him get in some posing until Taylor makes the rope and comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. A headscissors has Cheech in trouble and an overhead belly to belly sends him flying. Cheech is right back up with a moonsault press for two but Taylor hits a dropkick for the same.

The Awful Waffle is broken up and Cheech grabs some rollups for two each. Cheech superkicks him into the corner and hits a running kick to the face, followed by a 619 from the floor. Back in and Chuck hits his own kicks to the face, only to get caught with a spear. A running elbow in the corner drops Cheech for two and the Awful Waffle finishes Cheech at 6:29.

Rating: C-. It was energetic but this was every stereotype of an indy match you can find. They were doing everything they could all match with no selling and one spot after another. I know that’s the style that they want to have around here but it would be nice to see someone stop for a few seconds just to let something sink in for a change.

Post match Chuck is asked about his win and doesn’t like the idea of having to win a qualifying match. Vengeance is coming.

Ricochet vs. Arik Cannon

Cannon is an indy mainstay and RICOCHET HAS HAIR! LIKE SHOULDER LENGTH HAIR!!! Ricochet flips out of a wristlock to start so the bigger Cannon runs him over with a shoulder. A headscissors sends Cannon to the floor and Ricochet hits the cartwheel flip dive. Back in and Cannon nails a suplex into the corner but Ricochet takes him down for two off a quick rollup.

They trade strikes in the corner until Cannon drops him with a right hand into a brainbuster for two. Ricochet can’t hit a tornado DDT as Cannon reverses into a swinging brainbuster for another near fall. Back up and Ricochet kicks him in the face, setting up a 630 for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: C. Ricochet got to showcase himself a bit here but Cannon was dominating most of the match. That being said, Ricochet wasn’t exactly intimidating with the hair and not exactly filled out physique. Then again he was in his early 20s here and had a long way to go. Not a bad match, but they were flying through it so fast that it could only go so far.

Post match here’s Chuck Taylor to say that he’s from the south where they don’t believe in evolution. He’s into creationism so he’s here to create. The challenge is on, with Ricochet saying let’s do it now but Taylor walking off.

Silas Young is with Jimmy Jacobs and talks about what they want to do around here. Another wrestler (who might have been a very young Adam Cole) comes in to tell Jimmy that his match is coming up, which Jimmy does not seem to appreciate.

Brad Allen writes MOM on one set of wrist tape and MAC on the other, both with some crosses surrounding the names.

Dark City Fight Club vs. Aeroform

The Club is Jon Davis/Cory Chavis and were around the indies for years without ever making it to the big time. Aeroform is Louis Lyndon/Flip Kendrick, another team who would hang around for years. The smaller Aeroform starts fast and hits a double dropkick for two on Chavis. Back up and Chavis blasts Kendrick for two, setting up a modified Hart Attack (side kick instead of a clothesline, which Harlem Heat called the Big Apple Blast). Lyndon gets double teamed down as tags just seem to be a suggestion here.

Davis misses a charge in the corner and Lyndon gets over for the hot tag to Kendrick to clean house. Everything breaks down (Was it ever together in the first place?) and Lyndon has to avoid a brainbuster onto the apron. A springboard DDT Plants Davis and a 540 Spiral Tap gets two with Chavis making the save. Back up and Davis Pounces Kendrick, leaving Lyndon to take Project Mayhem (double hiptoss into a sitout powerbomb/neckbreaker combination) for the pin at 6:25.

Rating: C-. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it was just a mess with a bunch of flips vs. a bunch of power stuff. That isn’t quite thrilling stuff but it’s a basic formula that can work in most cases. I know tag team wrestling has basically devolved into two on two matches with tags just kind of being a detail but a little lip service to the idea that they still matter would be nice every now and then.

Mercedes Martinez vs. Niya

Mercedes is introduces as the WSU (Women Superstars Uncensored) World Champion but this seems to be non-title. Niya didn’t seem to wrestle very long and Martinez chops her into the corner to start. Some rolling suplexes set up a fisherman’s buster to finish Niya at 1:11. Yep Martinez is still awesome.

Post match, Martinez says she is here to fight men and women because she is here to evolve.

Brad Allen vs. Silas Young

Allen starts fast with a dropkick to knock Young into the ropes, setting up the big dive to the floor. Back in and Allen misses a high crossbody out of the corner and it’s time to chop it out. Allen gets the better of it and hits a springboard flip dive for two, followed by a gator roll to send Young outside. That means a DDT on the floor to drop Allen for a change, followed by a knee drop for two back inside.

A rolling elbow into a basement clothesline gives Young two more and frustration is setting in early. Allen uses the delay to grab a neckbreaker, followed by a slingshot Swanton for two more. Young gets flipped backwards onto the apron and then the floor, setting up a big moonsault from the top. That sounds good in theory, but Young dropkicking him out of the air made it a bit worse.

That’s good for a nineteen count and then two more for Young back inside. Young is even more frustrated and starts kicking Allen in the head. A hard clothesline gets two but Young misses a springboard moonsault, allowing Allen to hit a springboard spinning high crossbody for two of his own. Allen catches him in the corner and hits a swinging Downward Spiral for the pin at 10:23.

Rating: C+. I liked this a bit better as they had some more time and even sold a thing or two. This was a good deal slower than the previous matches and that’s a smart change after everything else has been so fast paced. It’s no classic or anything but Allen made a bit of an impression and you could see the potential in Young, even if he had to change a lot to become a star. Now why did Allen not have the writing on his wrist tape?

Post match, Allen says he has been fighting for this chance for his entire career and thanks Evolve for the chance. And his mom too. Allen goes to leave but comes back to say he wants Chris Hero at the next show.

Jimmy Jacobs vs. Ken Doane

That would be Kenny from the Spirit Squad. The much bigger Doane shoves him down with ease to start and unloads in the corner but Jacobs is right back up with some stomping of his own. A small package gives Jacobs two but his guillotine choke is broken up in a hurry. Doane ties him up in the ring skirt and hammers away for two back inside. Jacobs’ shoulder being up earns him another beating and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Doane trips him down again with a slingshot elbow getting two.

The chinlock goes on again and the fans think this is awesome. As I try to figure out if that is sarcasm, Jacobs breaks out and hits a quick clothesline. Doane’s slam and running forearm can’t keep Jacobs down so he whips Doane hard into the corner. Some stomps to the ribs get two but Doane is back up with a heck of a spinebuster for two.

A hanging DDT out of the corner gives Jacobs two but the Contra Code is countered into a bridging German suplex to give Doane two more. Doane’s guillotine legdrop (that always looked good) is enough for the pin at 10:07. Hold on though as Jacobs’ foot was on the ropes and TOMMY DREAMER (HOW IS HE ON EVERY SINGLE SHOW EVER???) comes down to point out the referee’s mistake. The match is restarted and Jacobs grabs the guillotine choke for the fast tap at 10:51.

Rating: C+. Doane is someone who was crippled by a horrible gimmick but he was completely watchable once he got away from the nonsense of the Spirit Squad. I’ve never been a Jacobs fan but he was doing a nice underdog deal here, which is more than I would have bet on. Nice match and that’s nice to see.

Post match Dreamer gets in the ring to say he’s back (When did he ever leave?). He walked away from something that he loved but he would never walk away from being in the wrestling ring. He thanks everyone for trying to live their dream and letting him live his. It was his dream to have a midcard match on an indy show restated? Get better dreams. Dreamer goes to leave but Jacobs says hang on a second (it has been a full thirty seconds since Dreamer got some praise).

Jacobs thanks Dreamer for promoting the show but won’t thank him for helping him win his first Evolve match, because Jacobs doesn’t need it. He is choosing to stand alone in Evolve and wants to know why Dreamer is here. Is it because he needs that one more minute in the spotlight? Jacobs wants that look off of Dreamer’s face because he has seen it for the last fifteen years. Dreamer takes his jacket off but Jacobs doesn’t need approval from a washed up has been. Dreamer is just here to have fun though and isn’t even being paid, so he jumps Jacobs. The fight is on with Dreamer getting the better of it because reasons.

Davey Richards is still warming up.

Ken Doane leaves the rest room with his bag over his shoulder and rants about how he is tired of being treated like this everywhere he goes. He storms off.

Chris Dickinson vs. Johnny Gargano

Gargano has long hair for a weird look and has only been wrestling for about five years. Dickinson takes him into the corner to start but Gargano is back with an enziguri into a running clothesline. An Ace Crusher gives Gargano two and it’s time to start trading cradles for two each.

Gargano gets something like the Rings of Saturn but it’s broken up for an exchange of strikes to the face. They’re both knocked to their knees with Gargano blocking a big kick to the ribs. Dickinson is right back with a Falcon Arrow for two and an elbow to the face gets two more. The knee pad comes down but Gargano catches him with a running DDT. There’s the Lawn Dart into a full nelson spun into a faceplant to finish Dickinson at 6:04.

Rating: C. This is one of the best parts about watching a show like this: seeing future stars as absolute nothings who are mainly there to fill in a spot on the card. Gargano looked a little odd with his longer hair but managed to keep his calm against the bigger and more athletic Dickinson. Good enough match here but another short one.

Post match some people show up to the VIP area and Gargano is rather pleased to see them. Again: NAME THESE PEOPLE.

TJP vs. Muneori Sawa

They trade some kicks to start with Sawa taking him to the mat for a quick trip to the rope for a break. A snap German suplex sends TJP flying but he’s right back with a rollup into a standoff and applause. Sawa can’t get the arm so he takes TJP into the corner for a kick to the chest. More rapid fire strikes connect but Sawa misses a running boot. Not that it matters as he takes TJP down by the leg and headbutts away at the knee, followed by an elbow to the ribs.

TJP is right back with a cross armbreaker, sending Sawa straight into the ropes for the break. Some kicks to the arm keep Sawa down but he’s back up for an exchange of strikes to the face. They slug it out from their knees until Sawa pulls him into a kneebar. The rope is grabbed so it’s a dragon screw legwhip, only to have TJP pull him into a cross armbreaker for the break. Back up and TJP’s leg is fine enough to fire off kicks, setting up another cross armbreaker. That’s reversed into a rollup for two and Sawa nails a Shining Wizard for two more. The Octopus goes on and TJP taps at 9:18.

Rating: B-. I’ve always liked TJP and that was the case again here. They were tearing it up with the submissions and holds, which made for a heck of a showcase. That’s the kind of thing you can always go with and it was great to see here. I don’t think I have ever seen Sawa before so it was cool to have someone fresh but still fun to watch. Good stuff here.

Adam Cole narrates his talk with Tommy Dreamer and promises people will remember him. So yeah the guy who looked like Adam Cole earlier was in fact Adam Cole.

Team Frightening vs. Akuma’s Army

That would be Frightmare/Hallowicked/Mike Quackenbush vs. Brodie Lee/Gran Akuma/Icarus and these guys are from Chikara. Mike takes Icarus down by the arm to start and that goes nowhere as commentary tries to explain the story here, which is as much of a downward spiral as you can get. Icarus slips out of an Octopus attempt and it’s quickly off to Hallowicked vs. Lee for an exchange of shoulders.

Hallowicked snaps off a running hurricanrana and brings Akuma back in, with Hallowicked taking him down with a spinning armdrag. It’s back to Icarus so Akuma gets in a cheap shot from the apron but a series of kicks from the ring and apron rock Akuma in a hurry. A victory roll gets two on Icarus and it’s back to Lee for a heck of a powerbomb. Frightmare gets knocked off the top and Lee pulls him back over the top for two.

Akuma comes back in and Frightmare uses him as a launchpad to hurricanrana Lee. The hot tag brings in Hallowicked, who charges into Lee’s swinging Boss Man Slam. The pace picks up and Akuma hits some double knees to the chest for two on Frightmare. Mike comes in for a super hurricanrana into a Swanton with Frightmare adding a standing moonsault for two on Akuma. Frightmare snaps off a tornado DDT to Lee and the Rydeen Bomb (Sky High) finishes Icarus at 11:34.

Rating: C+. This was another fast paced and entertaining match, though egads trying to figure out what the backstories in a Chikara match is harder than something that is very complicated. It was a nice addition on the show from an energy perspective but the costumes and characters do feel completely out of left field here. Pretty high energy match though and that’s all you can ask for out of a showcase.

The documentary filmmaker consoles TJP but then runs away when she realizes she is on camera.

Davey Richards vs. Kota Ibushi

Kyle O’Reilly, Tony Kozina and Michael Nakazawa are here. They waste no time in going with the hard strikes to the face with Ibushi knocking Richards out to the floor. Back in and Ibushi strikes away in the corner until they head to the apron where Richards snaps him down onto the apron. Richards starts in on the arm with a hammerlock suplex into a flipping over hammerlock.

There’s a stomp to the arm, followed by a modified Tequila Sunrise. Richards goes up top but Ibushi is right up there, only to get taken down by a flying armbar. Ibushi fights up with forearms to the face, with Richards seeming to enjoy them as usual. More cranking to the arm ensues and they both go to the apron. A fight over a superplex to the floor is broken up with Ibushi knocking him outside. That means the big moonsault can connect, followed by more rapid fire strikes into a standing moonsault for two.

Richards shrugs them off and hits his own missile dropkick, followed by the handspring kick to the head for two more. A cross armbreaker is broken up in a hurry but Ibushi flips out of a superplex attempt. The rapid fire kicks just wake Ibushi up more and it’s the double moonsault for two. Ibushi goes up but Richards catches him with the release German superplex. Running kicks in the corner rock Ibushi again and a big kick to the face gets two.

Ibushi rolls out of a kimura and snaps off the poisonrana, only to get blasted with a running clothesline. More strikes set up another running clothesline and the DR Driver gets two on Ibushi. They head up top for the exchange of headbutts and Ibushi knocks him down. The Phoenix splash misses and Richards knocks him down for a shooting star press. The Kimura makes Ibushi tap at 18:13.

Rating: B. It was very hard hitting and a very strong style match, but my goodness I had forgotten how annoying Richards could be. The ultra serious and hard hitting/striking stuff gets old fast and it did here again. There is something that seems so ridiculous about being hit in the face and just screaming at someone but that is almost all Richards would do. Good match for the style they were wanting, but I wouldn’t be complaining that this was Richards’ only Evolve match for about three years because of his new deal with ROH.

Brad Allen talks about how he signed with WWE and his mom was killed in a car wreck the next day. Egads that’s rough.

Johnny Gargano, Jimmy Jacobs and the VIP people from earlier try to get Silas Young to go out on the town with them. Young agrees, but gets a phone call as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is the definition of a promotion where if you like it you’ll like it and if you don’t like it you won’t. That might sound really simplified, but there is not going to be much of a middle ground on this stuff. It was a VERY similar style throughout with a good chunk of the roster using a bunch of kicks to the chest/head and submission holds. You know what you are getting here and if you like that style then you will enjoy it, but if that is not your thing, this is not likely to change your mind. The show is far from bad and nothing is overly terrible, but it very well might not be your style.