Smackdown – December 7, 2007: On Badstreet

Smackdown
Date: December 7, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Florence, South, Carolina
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re almost up to Armageddon and the big story continues to be Edge joining forces with Vickie Guerrero, making them the top villains around here. Edge is set to face Batista and Undertaker in a triple threat at the pay per view and that should make for a heck of a show. The rest of the card could use some build as well though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Vickie/Edge/Batista/Undertaker situation.

Opening sequence.

Here is Teddy Long, now the Assistant General Manager, to get things going with a State of Smackdown address. Teddy is happy to be back while Vickie Guerrero is out of action, which is why he made last week’s announcement. At Armageddon, it will be Edge and Undertaker challenging Batista for the World Title. Speaking of titles at the pay per view, MVP will be defending the United States Title against Rey Mysterio.

Cue Edge to interrupt and say that even a heart attack can’t stop Long. Edge reminds Long that he is the ASSISTANT General Manager, but Long says he is still the boss. After Edge talks to the camera to express his love to Vickie, Edge rants about how Long has screwed him out of the title over and over. Long logically explains all of his actions and gives Edge Kane tonight to shut him up.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse/Festus

Non-title. The bell rings and Festus chases Morrison to the floor, leaving Jesse to hiptoss Miz. A high crossbody gives Jesse two but a neck snap across the top cuts him off. That’s broken up and the hot tag brings in Festus to clean house with reckless abandon. A faceplant and big boot drop Morrison so it’s back to Jesse. That’s fine with Morrison, who crotches Jesse on top and steals the fast win. Miz and Morrison keep racking up wins, but they’re rapidly running out of teams to beat.

Elijah Burke doesn’t like the idea of being the last person on Batista’s mind and is going to beat him tonight.

We recap Edge vs. Kane, which started back in July when Kane attacked him, leading to the big injury.

Batista vs. Elijah Burke

Non-title. Burke backs into the corner to start and then gets backed into the corner for a bonus. A running clothesline rocks Burke but he dropkicks the knee out to get a breather. Burke hits a chop block into a basement dropkick for two, with Batista getting annoyed. Batista spears him out of the air and hits the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Jamie Noble hits on Michelle McCool with offers of….Pepto Bismol? Noble rants about being a real man, unlike Chuck Palumbo and puts out an offer: if Noble beats Palumbo again, he gets a date with McCool. Deal.

Jamie Noble vs. Chuck Palumbo

If Noble wins, he gets a date with Michelle McCool. Palumbo takes him into the corner to start and hammers away but Noble kicks the knee out. An overhead belly to belly rocks Noble, but he gets a knee up in the corner. McCool gets up on the apron and takes off her jacket for a distraction. Palumbo is almost sent into McCool though and a rollup gives Noble the pin (and the date).

Cole has an idea for the date: curling up on the couch and…..watching the Triumph and Tragedy of World Class DVD! Works for me, but I might be the minority.

It’s time for the VIP Lounge with MVP talking about how he has world class everything, so of course he wants to talk about World Class Championship Wrestling. We see what looks like a trailer for the DVD and here it this week’s guest: Michael PS Hayes! Complete with Bad Street! Hayes isn’t interested in sitting down but is willing to talk about all of the deaths from the promotions. Hayes: “Six Von Erich brothers. Five are dead.” The point of the DVD is to say no to drugs and that is a great message (fair).

Hayes wants people to learn that but MVP says that Hayes is a survivor. MVP: “You look good for your age.” Hayes doesn’t like that and asks if MVP can tell time. Of course he can, so Hayes asks how it feels for your time to be running out soon. MVP asks about Hayes’ receding hairline and his expanding waistline but backs off from a fight. Hayes wants to try to stick with the DVD but MVP switches to the Hardys. Like that time when MVP crippled Matt Hardy.

Hayes says the Hardys are their own men and when Matt is back, MVP will have a serious problem. That sends Hayes into a rant about Rey Mysterio taking MVP out last week. MVP calls out Hayes for being the third wheel of the Freebirds and says they carried him. Hayes goes off about how MVP has no respect for the people who got here so he’s ready to beat MVP up. The beatdown is on with MVP laying him out with the Playmaker but Rey Mysterio makes the (very late) save. At least this was a different way to build up the title match.

Remember that Edge vs. Kane video? Here it is again.

Batista is ready for Edge and Undertaker, though he knows how hard of a fight it is going to be.

Raw Rebound.

Hornswoggle is playing in Deuce N Domino’s car and they don’t like it. The chase is on but Finlay comes in, allowing Hornswoggle to break the antenna. A match is implied.

Finlay vs. Deuce

Hornswoggle, Domino and Cherry are here too. Deuce actually hammers him down in the corner to start but Finlay grinds away on the mat to take over. A headlock takeover puts Deuce down again, with Cole referring to Finlay as Great Khali. Domino chases Hornswoggle around the ring, allowing Deuce to jump the distracted Finlay and take over. The neck crank goes on but Finlay slugs away….as Finlay sprays Cherry with a fire extinguisher. The distraction lets Finlay get in a Shillelagh shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. The big thing here is that Finlay needed to cheat to beat Deuce. When in the world would that make sense? Anyway, Finlay and Hornswoggle are slowly becoming a decent team together and that is more than I would have bet on what seems to be a glorified comedy act. The match was nothing to see, but Finlay is still good most of the time.

Post match here is Great Khali but the distraction lets Domino get in a cheap shot. Khali vice grips Finlay down.

Armageddon rundown.

Kane vs. Edge

Batista is on commentary. Before the match, Edge declares his love for Vickie Guerrero. Kane chokes him down to start as Batista doesn’t want to talk about the past. Edge’s arm is wrapped around the post and the rope before a right hand puts him down again. The double arm crank goes on but Edge fights up and hits an Edge-O-Matic. A spear knocks Kane off the apron and we take a break.

Back with Edge driving knees into the ribs but Kane fights up and hits the running clothesline in the corner. There’s the side slam but Edge breaks up the top rope clothesline. The regular spear is cut off with a big boot and now the top rope clothesline drops Edge again. Kane loads up the chokeslam but Edge drops him throat first over the top rope. That’s enough for Edge to bring in a chair (but doesn’t use it), which draws the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was just getting going when they went with the ending to keep both of them strong. That’s the better result, as both of them have a match at the pay per view. At least they got in some good stuff before they wrapped things up, which is all you can ask for in a situation like this one.

Post match Kane beats Edge down and loads up the steps but Edge sends him face first into them. The Conchairto is loaded up but Batista comes in for the save….and there’s the gong. Undertaker pops up to chokeslam Edge, earning himself a spear from Batista to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There wasn’t much in the way of wrestling on this show, though the pay per view feuds got enough of a quick build to make the show sounds more interesting. While Armageddon isn’t entirely built around the triple threat, it is by far and away the biggest part of the show. Giving it a lot of attention here makes sense, but it would be nice for something else to get some significant time of its own.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – July 4, 2022: Hot Dog

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 4, 2022
Location: Pechange Arena, San Diego, California
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s a special day as we are live on a major holiday, meaning there will be a grand total of no one watching this show. We’re also fresh off of Money In The Bank and one briefcase is down, as Liv Morgan is the new Smackdown Women’s Champion. Theory is no longer the US Champion but he is Mr. Money In The Bank, which he probably will be for a long time since I’m not sure if Roman Reigns works here anymore. Let’s get to it.

Here is Money In The Bank if you need a recap.

Ric Flair’s WOO is back in the Then, Now, Forever opening.

The opening video features a look at some very American things before promising to celebrate freedom and breaking the bank tonight. Kind of weird that they didn’t go with a more traditional 4th of July video.

Here is new United States Champion Bobby Lashley to get things going. Lashley is very happy to be back and welcomes us to the show. It’s the man that makes the title and there is not another man in any division or promotion who can beat him for this title. Cue Theory to say he is a young Mr. Money In The Bank and while Lashley won the first half, Theory had a great comeback and came through in the clutch.

Lashley isn’t impressed, but Theory announces that he is getting a rematch at Summerslam and then is cashing in that night to leave with both titles. Lashley is ready to go right now but Theory knocks him down with the briefcase. That’s broken up and Lashley hits the big spinebuster to send Theory running.

The Mysterios are glad to be home.

Judgment Day vs. Mysterios

The villains jump the Mysterios before the bell and we start during the break. Back with Rey fighting back on Priest but a springboard is broken up with a shot to the face. Dominik is taken outside and sent into the barricade as we take a break less than two and a half minutes after we came back from the other one.

Back with Rey hitting a super seated senton on Priest but Dominik charges into a boot in the corner. Rey’s super hurricanrana gets two on Priest, setting up the double 619. A frog splash hits Balor’s raised knees so Dominik brings in a chair. Balor takes that away, meaning it’s time for Rey’s second Eddie tribute in thirty seconds…..and him falling down is enough for the DQ at 9:13.

Rating: C. This has been the latest edition of “Eddie Guerrero was awesome and you will remember that forever” theater, with a special encore at the end. Judgment Day losing to something screwy like this isn’t a good thing to see but at least the Mysterios didn’t get beaten down in their hometown. Granted the night is young, so you never know how bad it could get for them.

We look at Logan Paul signing with WWE and wanting to face the Miz.

Miz knows what it’s like to bring celebrity status into WWE and wants Paul to retract his statement about them being enemies. Now he’s ready to beat AJ Styles and prove the size of his testicles.

And now (well, earlier today), the Street Profits held a 4th of July party, but the Alpha Academy comes in to mock the Profits for losing last night and for not understanding what this holiday is about. Gable gets slapped in the face and the solution is Otis vs. Angelo Dawkins in a hot dog eating contest.

Judgment Day jumps the Mysterios in the back.

AJ Styles vs. Miz

Styles strikes away to start and sends Miz outside as we take an early break. Back with Styles in trouble and Miz hitting the short DDT for two. Not that it matters as the Phenomenal Forearm finishes for Styles at 6:25. Not enough shown to rate but this was nothing.

Post match Ciampa runs in to jump AJ but Styles fights back. Miz is back in with the Skull Crushing Finale and shakes hands with Ciampa, likely sealing Ciampa’s fate.

We recap Liv Morgan winning Money in the Bank and cashing in on Ronda Rousey later that night. Then Rousey was all happy and ok with losing the title.

Here is a crying Liv Morgan for her big championship speech. The fans say she deserves it but she says WE deserve it. She believed in herself and the fans believed in her, which gave her the confidence to do everything on Saturday. This is for all of us…..and here is Natalya to interrupt. Natalya wants the thank you for softening up Rousey and wants the title shot. Liv says bring it and you know where to find her but here is Carmella to interrupt. Carmella wants them to go back to Smackdown and Liv mocks her for the loss on Saturday. The double beatdown is on until Bianca Belair makes the save. Adam Pearce, tag match.

Liv Morgan/Bianca Belair vs. Carmella/Natalya

Joined in progress with Natalya coming in and getting headlocked by Morgan. That’s fine with Natalya, who takes her down and hits the basement dropkick for two. The Sharpshooter goes on so Belair tosses her hair over so Morgan can pull herself to the corner for a tag. Belair comes in but gets caught in another Sharpshooter. That’s broken up so Natalya posts her as we take a break, just over three minutes after coming back from the last one.

Back with Belair fighting out of a chinlock but getting stomped in the corner by Natalya. Belair gets over for the tag off to Morgan for a Codebreaker but Natalya drops her as well. Everything breaks down and Morgan has to kick off a Sharpshooter attempt. Oblivion finishes Natalya at 10:12.

Rating: C-. Yes, their big idea for Liv’s first night is a match with Natalya and Carmella, because that’s the best we can do on the 4th of July. I’m not sure how that is the best they have for her, but it isn’t like her title win was the kind of thing that deserves much better. I like Liv a good bit, but this isn’t the kind of thing that gives me the greatest hope for her future.

Back to the party, with Veer Mahaan having his food stolen, Omos throwing Reggie around and Ezekiel talking about bad 4th of July experiences with his brothers. Then Ezekiel sprays ketchup on Seth Rollins.

We get the creepy video from Money In The Bank, featuring various artifacts from various stars over the years.

Seth Rollins vs. Ezekiel

Rollins sends him into the corner but Ezekiel takes it to the floor for a breather. Back in and Rollins grabs a neckbreaker for two, only to have Ezekiel kick him out of the corner. Ezekiel takes Rollins down on the floor and we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting a Downward Spiral into the middle buckle, only to get kneed out of the air for two. Ezekiel pulls him out of the corner for a helicopter bomb and another near fall, followed by some rollups for the same. Rollins is back with the Stomp for the pin at 10:14.

Rating: C. Watchable enough match, but Ezekiel was in over his head here and that was fairly obvious. Odds are Rollins is being set up for another match with Riddle, likely at Summerslam, so he needed a boost here. Ezekiel is in danger of having his feud with Kevin Owens cool off while he’s gone, but how much longer could that have gone anyway?

Post match Rollins loads up another Stomp but Riddle runs in with the RKO to lay him out.

Earlier today, Akira Tozawa beat Otis and Angelo Dawkins in a hot dog eating contest, winning more than both of them combined. Chad Gable wants a recount but Otis isn’t feeling good.

Bobby Lashley/Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy/Theory

Dawkins and Theory start things off with Theory taking over and handing it off to Gable to go after the leg. That’s broken up and it’s Lashley and Ford busting out the double suplexes, with salutes. Dawkins adds the running flip dive and we take a break. Back with Ford knocking Theory down and diving over to tag….no one, as Gable pulled Dawkins off the apron.

Lashley gets the tag a few seconds later and starts cleaning house as Dawkins launches Theory over the announcers’ table. Lashley powerslams Gable but Otis makes the save. That’s fine with Lashley, who spears Otis to set up Ford’s frog splash. Gable makes a save this time and starts throwing suplexes, setting up a moonsault for two on Lashley. The American Automatic (Rolling Chaos Theory) is loaded up but Lashley escapes and hits the spear to pin Gable at 10:02.

Rating: C+. Best match on the show so far, and that is at least partially due to Otis and/or Dawkins not getting sick halfway through. There is always room for a good six man tag and this worked well enough, as the good guys didn’t get handed a fast loss. Gable is still better than what he is doing here but at least he is getting some TV time.

Post match, Otis vomits and we get a slow motion replay.

Becky Lynch doesn’t care about any of this and wants the Women’s Title back. She is ready for Asuka but Asuka isn’t ready for her.

And now, Uncle Sam’s 4th of July celebration, with R-Truth dressed as Uncle Sam. We hear about this being the greatest holiday, which celebrates America’s victory over the aliens in 1996. Sam reads his favorite passage from the Constitution: “WELCOME TO EARTH!” Cue Ludvig Kaiser and Gunther to interrupt so pain can begin.

Gunther vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Graves about Gunther: “He is not human. He is like a piece of iron.” Nice Rocky IV line, but you got the countries wrong you buffoon. Big boot, clothesline and powerbomb finish for Gunther at 48 seconds.

Alexa Bliss wants the title back but Asuka comes in to yell at her.

Same spooky vignette from earlier.

Video on Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns.

Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Street fight and they both have weapons. It’s a brawl to start with Asuka kicking her down and hitting a chair shot to the back. Becky manages to get a chair into the corner but Asuka breaks that up and hits a dropkick off of another chair. A powerbomb off the apron is broken up and Becky hits a Bexploder onto the pile of chairs on the floor. They trade chair shots until Asuka hits a running hip attack into a chair into Becky through the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Becky going up top but getting caught with a chair. A superplex onto the pile of chairs rocks Becky so Asuka puts a trashcan over her and strikes away. There’s the missile dropkick to drop Becky for two so it’s time to set up the table. With that blocked, Asuka loads up the mist, which Becky blocks with a well timed umbrella. Asuka takes her up top but Becky is back with the Manhandle Slam through the table for the pin at 11:40.

Rating: B-. It was ok, but it was little more than a house show main event. They have probably had this match about a dozen times in front of not that many people and that is not a bad thing. They never came close to another gear or anything close to it, but Becky getting her big win is a good idea. Now just don’t have them fight ever again.

Becky says she’s back to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The show wasn’t the worst, but it felt every bit of its three hours plus a lot more. That made for a very rough night as the matches were only so good for the most part. The 4th of July stuff wasn’t awful, but Otis vomiting and the Uncle Sam stuff didn’t have me begging to see more. Overall, this was the definition of a holiday show: they knew no one was going to be watching and presented a show that wouldn’t change a thing in three hours. This wasn’t a nightmare, but it was dull and that is often worse.

Results
Mysterios b. Judgment Day via DQ when Finn Balor was accused of using a chair
AJ Styles b. Miz – Phenomenal Forearm
Liv Morgan/Bianca Belair b. Carmella/Natalya – Oblivion to Natalya
Seth Rollins b. Ezekiel – Stomp
Bobby Lashley/Street Profits b. Theory/Alpha Academy – Spear to Gable
Gunther b. R-Truth – Powerbomb
Becky Lynch b. Asuka – Manhandle Slam through a table

 

 

 

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Smackdown – July 1, 2022: Nope.

Smackdown
Date: July 1, 2022
Location: Footprint Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank and that means we probably need a lot of talk about the percentages of wrestlers who successfully cash in. I for one could go for some good old statistics to make me care about the show, as it isn’t like there is much else to say. Maybe they can surprise us though. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The participants in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match are on ladders in the ring (save for Omos) and talk about how they want to win on Saturday. It means they can cash in, with Seth Rollins saying Summerslam sounds like a good idea. Sami Zayn says he’ll win and keep the contract in the Bloodline’s house. MVP laughs off the idea of anyone but Omos winning and there is no one who can do anything to stop them. Sheamus wants to beat Brock Lesnar, though Drew McIntyre says he has already done it.

Cue Miz (Drew: “The frickin MIZ?”) to says he is a two time Mr. Money in the Bank winner and deserves to be in the match. Cue Ezekiel to say what you would expect, followed by Happy Corbin doing the same. Madcap Moss joins in and here is Adam Pearce to make a battle royal.

Battle Royal

Omos, Ezekiel, Madcap Moss, Happy Corbin, Miz, Sheamus, Seth Rollins, Drew McIntyre, Riddle

Not just a battle royal, but a GOOD OLD FASHIONED battle royal. It’s a brawl to start with no one being able to do much with anyone. Omos tosses Ezekiel and does the same to Moss, followed by Miz, leaving Corbin and those already qualified. McIntyre and Omos have their slugout, which goes badly for McIntyre as he gets thrown down. Sheamus gets tossed into the corner as well and Rollins eliminates himself in a smart move, only to have Riddle go outside (not eliminated) and hit an RKO on the floor. Everyone gets rid of Omos and we take a break.

Back with the villains taking over on Riddle and McIntyre, which lasts as long as you might expect until Sheamus hits the forearms to Sami’s chest. Riddle is back with a Bro To Sleep to Sheamus, followed by the snap powerslam (minus some of the snap). Back up and Sheamus knees Riddle out, leaving us with Sheamus, Sami, Corbin and McIntyre. Sami Helluva Kicks Sheamus by mistake but Sheamus is fine enough to Claymore McIntyre.

Now it’s McIntyre getting to clean house, though he doesn’t actually eliminate anyone. With Corbin on the ground (not eliminated, meaning he’s winning), McIntyre hits the Futureshock on Sheamus. Sami comes back and gets Claymored, setting up the elimination. Sheamus is almost dumped but it’s Corbin coming back in to toss McIntyre and Sheamus at the same time for the win at 15:25.

Rating: C-. What else is there to say about a match like this? It didn’t have any stakes and Corbin was telegraphed as the winner as soon as he was the only one not in the ladder match left. It isn’t an interesting match and it wasn’t that good, but at least it filled up the first half hour of the show.

Corbin is happy with his win but has nothing to be said about Pat McAfee.

Video on Natalya vs. Ronda Rousey, mainly focusing on last week’s showdown and exchange of insults.

Natalya laughs off Ronda Rousey’s threats and mocks Rousey’s movie career. Now she is going to make Rousey tap out and become the two time Smackdown Women’s Champion.

New Day vs. Viking Raiders

Before the match, Kofi says it’s great to be in Phoenix in June. Woods: “Kofi it’s not June anymore.” Kofi: “JU-LYING!” That somehow wins him $5 but it’s time to get serious. Last week the Vikings were back and attacked them, so get out here right now and get your Asgards kicked. The team is officially billed as The New Vicious Viking Raiders, just to hammer in the idea. It’s a brawl before the bell and New Day is left laying after a bunch of shield shots. No match.

Happy Corbin, Ezekiel, Miz and Madcap Moss are arguing over who should be in the Money in the Bank ladder match. Miz: “I WAS ON THE TODAY SHOW THIS MORNING!” Moss: “I’m just happy to be here.” As Miz looks appalled by that statement, the four way for the spot is announced for later, making the entire first half hour of this show a waste of time.

Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss vs. Shotzi/Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans

Becky Lynch comes out to join commentary as Asuka shoves Shotzi into the corner to start. Evans comes in to take Asuka into the corner and there’s the slingshot Bronco Buster. A sunset flip slows Rodriguez down so Bliss comes in for a change. Rodriguez splashes her in the corner to cut that off, followed by a running shoulder to drop her again.

Liv comes in and gets taken down in the corner by Shotzi. That sets off the parade of flips and dives as the Raw women stand tall as we take a break. Back with Bliss dropkicking Rodriguez as Cole tries to talk to Lynch and McAfee actually calls the match. Shotzi takes over on Bliss and grabs….I think a Boston crab, but Bliss escapes.

Bliss escapes and brings in Asuka, who seems to no sell and enziguri and grabs the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Asuka hits the hip attack for two. Another hip attack misses in the ropes so Liv tags herself in and hits the Codebreaker, with Rodriguez having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Oblivion finishes Shotzi at 13:18.

Rating: D+. This is the kind of match that makes me loathe Money in the Bank season. This was the better part of fifteen minutes for the sake of building momentum towards a match that has nothing to do with pinning each other. The teams will be fighting each other tomorrow and absolutely none of this will matter. Somehow this is all WWE does for the ladder matches and it’s an even bigger waste of time every year.

Sonya Deville asks Adam Pearce about the handicap match last week and has FILED AN OFFICIAL COMPLAINT. Deville slaps him in the face and leaves. I said an audible “oh good grief” on that one as this dumb power struggle story continues.

And now, a GAME SHOW between the Usos and the Street Profits, with Kayla Braxton presiding. This means Braxton asks questions, such as are the Usos scared to lose. They aren’t scared because they run all of the shows but the Profits say the Usos just run to the grocery store for Roman Reigns.

As for the Profits, it has been a year and half since they have been champs, and now there are rumors they aren’t getting along. Ford: “Where did you hear that?” Dawkins: “Dirtsheets?” Profits: “Probably.” Ford talks about the Usos’ family, prompting the Usos to say “respect”. They talk about legacy, trash talk each other and steal the other team’s catchphrases before staring each other down. I was promised a game show here but there was no game show to be found.

Max Dupri is ready for his Maximum Male Models showcase.

And now, Max Dupri for the debut of his models. Dupri introduces the models, starting with ma.çè (pronounced “Mah-Say”), yes spelled that way and formerly known as Mace), with Dupri explaining how physically perfect his physique is. Next up is the former Mansoor, but now known as Man.soor (with the letters having symbols over them that I don’t know how to type). Pronounced “Man-Swah”, he has a fanny pack around his neck, drawing in some Michael Hayes comparisons. Believe it or not, McAfee is a huge fan and Cole is trying not to break. For a lower midcard gimmick, I’ve certainly seen worse.

Ronda Rousey reminds us that her daughter is nine months old instead of ten like Natalya said. Oh and she’ll make Natalya tap tomorrow. Keeping this short and sweet is a good idea.

Money In The Bank rundown.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Happy Corbin vs. Miz vs. Madcap Moss vs. Ezekiel

It’s a brawl to start with neither being able to do much. Ezekiel and Moss are left alone with the former hitting a slam but getting elbowed in the jaw. With Ezekiel on the floor, Corbin comes back in to clean house, only to have Miz break it up. Everyone else is on the floor with Miz missing a charge and being sent into the announcers’ table. Corbin sends Moss into the steps and chokeslams Ezekiel onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Corbin in control but Moss is back with the Punchline for two as Ezekiel makes a save.

Ezekiel’s middle rope crossbody is countered into a fall away slam but Miz is there with the running knee to Moss. Deep Six cuts Miz off for two more and Corbin is frustrated. Ezekiel is back up to clean house until he has to break out of Corbin’s chokeslam attempt. A jumping knee rocks Corbin and there’s a spinebuster to Moss. Miz gets sent into the corner but comes back with the Skull Crushing Finale for two as Corbin makes the save. Corbin hits End of Days on Miz but takes too long looking at McAfee, allowing Moss to send him into the post and steal the pin on Miz at 10:34.

Rating: C. So yes, the entire first half hour of this show was a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME because it meant absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. That is a very Money in the Bank season match and I can’t say I’m the slightest bit surprised. The ending probably helps set up McAfee vs. Corbin, which is going to be fun later in the month, but it would have been nice to do something a bit more important for this show.

McAfee mocks Corbin to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Nope. This was the kind of show that I can’t stand and yet here it was with every one of the problems that you would expect from a show like this one. It felt like they were trying to fill in the two hours that they had here with stuff that either meant nothing or wasn’t good enough to make a more important show. It’s the reason why I can’t stand this time of year in WWE and I’m not surprised it was any worse this time around.

Results
Happy Corbin won a battle royal last eliminating Drew McIntyre and Sheamus
Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss b. Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans/Shotzi – Oblivion to Shotzi
Madcap Moss b. Ezekiel, Happy Corbin and Miz – End of Days to Miz

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 27, 2022: Twenty Years Is A Long Time

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 27, 2022
Location: Sames Auto Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Jimmy Smith

It’s a very special night as John Cena is here to celebrate twenty years (to the day) of his WWE debut. That should be enough to carry the night and that might need to be the case. This is also the go home edition of Raw for Money In The Bank, meaning it’s time to build momentum, establish dominance, and maybe even come up with an original tagline for what the participants are doing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Earlier today, John Cena returned to quite the hero’s welcome, meeting a bunch of applauding wrestlers and backstage workers. He does kind of deserve it.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Battle Royal

T-Bar, Mustafa Ali, Shanky, Akira Tozawa, Rey Mysterio, Dominik Mysterio, Ricochet, Shinsuke Nakamura, Jinder Mahal, Riddle, Miz, AJ Styles, Ciampa, Reggie, Shelton Benjamin, Dolph Ziggler, R-Truth, Veer Mahaan

Tozawa is tossed out fast and Mahaan clotheslines Benjamin out. The Mysterios and Ali get together and eliminate Mahaan, leaving R-Truth to try to dance with Shanky. Mahal is having none of that though and Truth is tossed. Styles eliminates Mahal and Shanky, with T-Bar throwing Reggie onto them.

We take a break and come back with Ali gone at Ciampa’s knee but Styles knocks Ciampa out. Miz blocks Rey’s 619 and hits the short DDT, which isn’t enough for the elimination. Dominik tries to get rid of Ziggler but gets tossed himself. Miz manages to toss Rey but can’t do the same to Riddle, who gets back in underneath the bottom rope. Ricochet knocks T-Bar to the apron, where he pulls Ricochet out with him.

Ricochet gets thrown onto a standing ladder before diving back to the apron. A not so great headscissors takes T-Bar out as we take another break. Back again with Riddle, Miz, Ziggler, Ricochet, Nakamura and Styles still alive. Miz hits a middle rope ax handle on Riddle but hurts his leg on the landing and goes down. Nakamura knocks Ziggler out but gets kicked to the floor by Riddle. Miz is down on the floor (not eliminated) with medics looking at his knee as Ricochet is catapulted onto the middle rope.

A spinning crossbody is dropkicked out of the air by Styles, who throws Ricochet out. That leaves us with Riddle vs. Styles, with Corey saying we’re down to two. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Miz pops up to pull Styles out, meaning it’s Miz vs. Riddle. The hanging DDT drops Miz but he counters the RKO into the Skull Crushing Finale. Riddle manages to hurricanrana him out to the apron and the RKO is good enough to give Riddle the win at 19:23.

Rating: C. It was a battle royal and they almost had to go with Riddle getting the win here. At the end of the day, he has one of the biggest stories in the company at the moment and it involves Roman Reigns. As for the match itself, it was a long battle royal but at least they had some star power there at the end and that is what makes these work as well as they can most of the time.

Commentary: The field is complete!

Commentary: There is one spot left!

Get it together people.

The Street Profits introduce John Cena….but he’s on the wrong side, meaning the camera has to swing around a bit. They ask Cena for advice at Money In The Bank but he reminds them of their success. Cena tells them to never stop, which they interpret as……Never Give Up.

Shawn Michaels, Big Show (he doesn’t even go here), Booker T., Daniel Bryan (he doesn’t even go here either), Trish Stratus and HHH all congratulate Cena on his 20 years.

Riddle is fired up about Money in the Bank and shakes Kevin Patrick to blow off some of the steam.

Jimmy Uso vs. Montez Ford

Uso runs him over to start but gets armdragged into an armbar for his efforts. That’s broken up and they head outside, with Ford being sent into the steps as we take a break. Back with Ford fighting up and hitting a clothesline, followed by a kick to the ribs. The running Blockbuster gives Ford two and he hits a heck of a dive against the barricade. Back in and one heck of a frog splash finishes Jimmy at 9:50.

Rating: C+. They had a good enough match here, but I could go for ANYTHING ELSE to keep the story going until Saturday. Have them talk to each other if you have to, but find a way to fill in the gap a bit differently. They’ve done this over and over now and odds are we’ll see it again on Smackdown, because you have to complete the concept you see.

The Mysterios run into Finn Balor and Damian Priest. Balor talks about Rey coming up on his 20 year anniversary but says Rey hasn’t been doing so well as of late. Priest gives Dominik a sales pitch and Rey has to be held back. The match seems to be set for next week in San Diego.

Here’s a long John Cena career retrospective, complete with a look at Cena debuting against Kurt Angle and Undertaker giving him the famous handshake of respect. We also see stuff on his Make-A-Wish work and wrap it up with the testimonials. I know he might not be the most popular and there are some fair criticisms about him, but my goodness Cena is one of the all time legends for a reason.

Here is Miz for a chat, but first we need to look at Logan Paul training at the Performance Center. Miz promises that he and Paul will be back at Summerslam, but first we need to look at Miz turning on Paul at Wrestlemania. Miz mocks the idea of the interviewer being a journalist and hypes up his own media career. After Wrestlemania, he told Paul that was an education and promises that they will be Tag Team Champions. The only disappointment is AJ Styles, which prompts a question about Miz’s tiny……and we are NOT making that a thing. Cue AJ to deck Miz and the match is on.

AJ Styles vs. Miz

Styles starts fast and hits the drop down dropkick but Miz is right back with a shot of his own. The running crotch attack in the ropes drops AJ again and the ax handle gives Miz two. The chinlock goes on for a bit, only to have Miz get knocked to the floor. Styles misses the moonsault though and Miz drops him again as we take a break.

Back with Miz hitting the YES Kicks but AJ snaps off a German suplex for a breather. The fireman’s carry neckbreaker gives AJ two but Miz gets in a shot of his own to cut him off. AJ counters the Skull Crushing Finale into a rollup for two and there’s a brainbuster to leave both of them down. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Miz bails to the floor and takes the countout at 13:00.

Rating: C. Not exactly a great match but Miz being a coward continues to work out for him. This felt like a match sent out there to fill in time though and that is rarely a good feeling. It was fine while it lasted, but both guys seem to be waiting on something to do. Miz has that in the form of Logan Paul, though I don’t know about Styles at the moment.

John Cena meets Ezekiel, which has him a bit confused. Cena asks about Elias, who is apparently giving Elrod (yes Elrod) a tour. His advice to Ezekiel though: never forget who you really are. Ezekiel leaves but Theory comes in and hypes himself up, listing off his accomplishments. Oh and Cena is a grown man wearing jorts. Theory loads up the selfie but Cena slips away.

Kurt Angle, Randy Orton, JBL, Chris Jericho (there’s a gasp), Stephanie McMahon and Steve Austin all pay tribute to John Cena.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. After a look at Carmella jumping her last week, Belair lists off her catchphrases and tells Carmella to come get her right now. Cue Carmella to say she has the beauty and the brains and is going to take the title on Saturday. Kevin Patrick tries to ask Belair another question so Carmella tries a cheap shot, which earns her a right hand to the face. Belair stands tall. This felt like they had to get these two on the show and they couldn’t think of anything else.

Liv Morgan and Alexa Bliss are friends now but they won’t be on Saturday. Badly written lines with worse line reading ensues.

Liv Morgan vs. Alexa Bliss

Asuka is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with some grappling going to Bliss. She misses the moonsault knees though as Asuka can’t quite master English again. Bliss avoids a middle rope dropkick and grabs the chinlock. Back up and Oblivion misses, allowing Bliss to grab the DDT. That’s countered into a rollup to give Morgan the pin at 3:23, leaving Asuka worried/surprised.

Rating: C-. Asuka was a bit of a distraction here but the match wasn’t going to be much in the first place. This felt like the kind of match where Morgan was supposed to build momentum but, as is the case every time, it has nothing to do with a ladder match. I don’t know how much of a chance either of them have on Saturday, though I can take these two getting a few minutes to remind us that they’re around.

Video on John Cena’s Make-A-Wish stuff. Still absolutely incredible.

Here is Vince McMahon to introduce John Cena, who comes through a tunnel of adoring stars. With Vince gone, Cena says this is a milestone, which he rarely likes to celebrate because he is always looking forward. However, tonight he has been looking back at what he has done and he couldn’t do it without these people. Cena has been allowed to do this for two decades and that is because of the fans.

The people have been honest enough to tell him when he sucks and kind enough to tell him when he doesn’t. Cena has been waiting for that right moment and this feels like that right moment. We get a THANK YOU CENA chant and he says his heart is beating out of his chest. Cena thanks the fans for moments like that one and for making him who he is. He has always said WWE prepared him for anything and he doesn’t mean Fast and the Furious or Peacemaker.

WWE has made him a better human being, person and husband. Spending moments with the families he has spent time with today has taught him empathy and kindness. The fans have taught him humility and perseverance and every time he gets in the ring, he gives everything he has because these fans give him everything they have. This isn’t about a last name but about people coming together and he’s 45 years old. He doesn’t know when you’ll see him again, though he isn’t saying it isn’t happening. Fans: “ONE MORE MATCH!” Cena: “It ain’t just gonna be one. Don’t worry about that.”

It isn’t about him but about us. If you like something, tell the people. If you see something that sucks, tell the people. Cena thanks the people and asks Laredo to show what kind of noise they can make. Some catchphrases wrap us up. Cena didn’t say much here, but it felt a lot more real than some of the things he usually says. Good stuff, even if it didn’t mean a great deal.

Alpha Academy vs. Bobby Lashley

Theory is guest enforcer. Lashley can’t clothesline Otis down to start but he can shoulder him down. Theory gets on the apron to break up the suplex attempt though, leaving Lashley to send Otis into the corner. Lashley chases Theory outside, allowing Chad Gable to hit a flip dive off the apron. Otis adds the splash and we take a break.

Back with Lashley still in trouble but fighting out of a neck crank. Otis breaks up a superplex and powerbombs Lashley down, setting up Gable’s moonsault for two. Otis goes up this time but Lashley catches him in an electric chair. Gable comes off the top, only to land in the Hurt Lock for the tap at 8:18.

Rating: C. All this match did is make me wonder why we didn’t get to see this match last week to set up Lashley vs. Theory at Money In The Bank. It kept Theory from taking a loss and served the entirely same purpose. At least they kept Lashley looking strong and he should be in for a good match against Theory at the show.

Post match the beatdown is on but Lashley fights them all off.

We look at Cody Rhodes defeating Seth Rollins inside the Cell and Rollins attacking him the next night on Raw.

We get an interview with Cody, who has his pectoral muscle taped up while sitting in a gym. Cody says he might have been flying a little too close to the sun and now he is out for nine months, though he is trying to beat that. He gives his thoughts on the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match, which includes Rollins. If Rollins wins, Cody will be the first to congratulate him.

Seth Rollins comes up to John Cena in the back and laughs to the tune of Cena’s music. Rollins compares their careers and success before saying he’ll win Money in the Bank. Then Omos pops up to scare Rollins a bit, which MVP seems to like. Rollins looks to Cena for help but Cena wishes him luck and bails.

Money in the Bank rundown.

Becky Lynch vs. Tamina vs. Doudrop vs. Nikki Ash vs. Shayna Baszler vs. Xia Li

Elimination match and everyone jumps Becky to start. The ring is cleared other than Tamina and Doudrop but Nikki breaks up the staredown. Ash breaks that up but the fight goes through anyway, allowing Becky to come in with a Molly Go Round to Doudrop. Li comes back in to roll Becky up for two but Li has to deal with Ash. The Manhandle Slam gets rid of Li at 2:32 so it’s Shayna coming in to go after Becky.

With that broken up, Doudrop comes in to crush Shayna in the corner but Tamina makes a save. Ash sends Tamina into Becky’s missile dropkick, only to have Becky Disarm Ash for the tap at 4:25. We take a break and come back with Becky suplexing Baszler against the barricade but Doudrop crushes Becky and Tamina against the same barricade.

Back in and we hit the Tower of Doom to leave everyone laying again in the big crash. Baszler kneebars Tamina but gets splashed by Doudrop for the pin at 10:55. Tamina Samoan drops Becky but misses the Superfly Splash. Doudrop Vader Bombs Tamina for the pin at 12:22, ending my thinking that WWE might actually go there. That leaves Doudrop to miss the Vader Bomb on Becky, who is back with a super Manhandle Slam for the win at 13:18.

Rating: C+. Did they just forget about Becky being a heel for a night? This was Becky mowing down the women’s undercard without much trouble and acting like a total heroine the whole time. I was slightly worried that they would go with Tamina here but they got Becky into the match, as they needed to do. Just remember what kind of a person she is at the moment.

Overall Rating: C. Cena carried this show with star power alone because the rest of the show was only so good. It was about building up two spots in the ladder matches and a few other things for Saturday, as the card is only looking so interesting. You can only get so much out of a pay per view that is about a future title shot rather than the title that night, which might explain why it is in the friendly confines of an arena. The show wasn’t all that exciting, but Cena helped it along well enough.

Results
Riddle won a battle royal last eliminating Miz
Montez Ford b. Jimmy Uso – Frog splash
AJ Styles b. Miz via countout
Liv Morgan b. Alexa Bliss – Small package
Bobby Lashley b. Alpha Academy – Hurt Lock to Gable
Becky Lynch won a five woman elimination match last eliminating Doudrop

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – December 6, 2007: Pick Your Not Quite Poison

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: December 6, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Florence, South Carolina
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re on Thursday here, probably due to some kind of a scheduling conflict, and that means a grand total of nothing. The big story coming out of last week saw Mark Henry attacking Kane and seemingly joining forces with Big Daddy V. Kane is going to need some help and maybe he can get that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Matt Striker is in the back with Big Daddy V and Mark Henry, saying that CM Punk now has no other choice. Punk can pick one of them to face and they will take his title. Isn’t that a choice?

Opening sequence.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Major Brothers

Non-title. Brett wastes no time in dropkicking Miz to the floor for a slingshot dive before Brian does the same thing to Morrison. A cheap shot takes Brett down on the floor though and it’s a double faceplant to drop Brett back inside. Morrison’s running knee to the face gets two but Brett slips out of a double belly to back, allowing the hot tag off to Brian for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down and Brian takes Miz to the floor, leaving Brett to get dropped throat first on top. The flipping neckbreaker gives Morrison the pin.

Rating: C. I like Miz and Morrison getting somewhere with the wins, but there are only so many teams for them to run over one after another. It makes sense to have Smackdown and ECW work together and it has helped, but as usual, the double Tag Team Champions deal doesn’t quite work in WWE. Normally I would say you would hope they could learn, but I don’t think I’m that gullible.

CM Punk doesn’t care if he’s facing Big Daddy V or Mark Henry because he loses either way. Armando Alejandro Estrada or Matt Striker can choose, because he’ll fight either of them.

Balls Mahoney/Kelly Kelly vs. Victoria/Kenny Dykstra

The guys start things off with Dykstra hitting a dropkick for an early two. That earns him the snap jabs from Mahoney so it’s off to the women. A very spinning headscissors drops Victoria for two and Kelly slaps Dykstra for a bonus. Victoria knocks her down and grabs a choke to keep things slow. Kelly fights up and brings Mahoney back in to roll Dykstra up for the pin.

Rating: C-. This would be your feel good win of the week as Kelly and Mahoney continue to have nothing to do together but they’re stuck here for the time being. The oddball thing was fun while it lasted but how far can you really go with something like this? Nothing match as you might have guessed, though what else could they have done?

Here is Shelton Benjamin to talk about promises. People are promised all kinds of good things, including him. He was promised that one day he would get his big break, because he is the Gold Standard.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Benjamin takes him down to start but a crucifix gives Yang two. Back up and a heck of a buckle bomb drops Yang again, setting up a neck crank to put Yang in more trouble. That’s broken up but Yang’s high crossbody is countered into a gutbuster. The jumping Downward Spiral gives Benjamin the pin.

Rating: C. The series of Benjamin squashes continues as they still need to come up with a name for that finisher. The gutbuster out of the air was pretty awesome, but there is only so much that can be gotten out of Benjamin with that goofy looking gold hair. It’s an idea that might have worked on paper but it isn’t quite clicking otherwise.

Here’s the opening video again.

Armageddon rundown.

Kevin Thorn v. Jeff Lewis

Thorn is just a guy in trunks this time. Lewis grabs the arm to start and gets planted with a quick backbreaker, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A torture rack backbreaker finishes Lewis in a hurry.

Here is Matt Striker to toss a coin to determine CM Punk’s opponent for tonight.

CM Punk vs. Mark Henry

Non-title and Punk’s early kick to the chest has no effect. A waistlock is quickly countered with straight power so Punk goes with the required choke on the back. Henry doesn’t seem to mind as he walks Punk out to the floor for a posting to break it up. Back in and Henry steps on the ribs but has to shrug off Punk’s rapid fire kicks. The nerve hold goes on, though the fans stay right there behind Punk. The charge in the corner misses though and Punk hits the running knee, only to have Big Daddy V come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? Henry is the better of the two options, but it isn’t like he can do that much at the moment. Punk is still in need of some challengers though and these two could do well in the role, assuming you don’t expect too much from them. Like a good match here for instance.

Post match the beating is on until Kane makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. They have things going on here, but that doesn’t mean they are the most interesting. Punk and Kane vs. the monsters feels like something that is done to fill time until Punk is ready for his next real match ad that is only going to get them so far. The rest of the show is pretty skippable, but they certainly get points for putting in some kind of effort to build stories and people up. Just execute it better.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 20, 2022: All The Old Tricks

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 20, 2022
Location: Pinnacle Bank Arena, Lincoln, Nebraska
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are less than two weeks away from Money in the Bank and that means we are probably in for some qualifying matches. Those can make for some interesting showdowns, though I’m not sure I would get my hopes up for that around here. On top of that, Riddle gets to deal with the fallout of losing to Roman Reigns on Smackdown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Tim White.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. After getting in her catchphrases, she says that the match with Rhea Ripley isn’t happening….for now. So who gets the title shot at Money in the Bank instead? Tonight we have five women competing, in the form of Alexa Bliss, Liv Morgan, Carmella, Asuka and Becky Lynch, in a fatal five way match to see who gets the shot. All five competitors come out one by one to say they should get the title shot while also taking shots at each other. Belair says she is ready for a fight so let’s have the match. Standard revolving door intro as the women continue to be catty to each other.

Alexa Bliss vs. Liv Morgan vs. Asuka vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella

One fall to a finish. Bliss and Morgan trade rollups to start and then roll around the ring on a small package attempt. Carmella comes back in to cover both of them until Asuka comes in to miss a bunch of strikes to the face. A spinning backfist drops Carmella but Becky trips Asuka to the floor. Bliss’ running Blockbuster gets two on Carmella, who rolls Bliss up and yells at her. Back in and Morgan sends Carmella into the corner before going up, only to be shoved onto the pile. Corey: “Who is headed to Money in the” and we go to a break.

Back with Becky escaping the Asuka Lock and hitting the Manhandle Slam on Asuka. Bliss comes off the top for the save and gets her own two with Morgan and Carmella making their own save. Becky drops Morgan but gets pulled to the floor by Asuka for the save. Bliss tries Twisted Bliss but hits raised knees, only to have Carmella superkick Morgan for the pin at 12:23.

Rating: C-. So they’re just punting on the title match? I’m not sure why Ripley is out but Belair could probably wrestle herself to a more interesting match than anything Carmella is going to be able to offer. Carmella hasn’t been around since Wrestlemania but now she gets a title match because someone is out? I know Becky and Asuka vs. Belair have been done but….Carmella? It’s almost like having such a shallow women’s division can cause problems.

Post match, Becky Lynch is yelling about not being at Money in the Bank. Post break, Becky is still yelling and eventually gets a Money in the Bank qualifying match against Asuka for later tonight. Becky is not pleased, though she might not be as surprised if she had read the official Raw preview that advertised Lynch vs. Asuka in a qualifying match.

Here is Vince McMahon for a chat. This week marks the 1517th episode of Raw, continuing its role as the longest running weekly episodic show in history. For that, Vince thanks the fans for being there for them. Twenty of those years have been dominated by John Cena, who is back next week. End of speech, though Vince does trip a bit on the way out of the ring. Now that felt like trolling.

Video on Roman Reigns vs. Riddle on Smackdown, with Reigns retaining but getting taken out by the returning Brock Lesnar after the fact. Reigns vs. Lesnar, Last Man Standing at Summerslam.

Here is Riddle for a chat before his Money in the Bank qualifying match. Before the match, Riddle talks about swearing vengeance against Roman Reigns for injuring Randy Orton. He got THIS close on Smackdown but a big spear was enough to beat him. Now Riddle can’t challenge for the title again, but he can win Money in the Bank and cash in to end Reigns’ reign of terror. We hear about the other participants, with Riddle wanting to hit Seth Rollins with a ladder for what he did to Cody Rhodes.

Cue Omos and MVP to interrupt, with MVP suggesting that Riddle is REALLY high right now if he thinks he has a chance against Omos. Tonight, Riddle is going to have a bad comedown when Omos slams him down. Riddle likes the joke but promises to take Omos down with an RKO, which is spelled with three letters.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Riddle vs. Omos

Riddle has taped up ribs but charges at him to start, setting up some rapid fire kicks in the corner. Omos takes him down with a side slam and hits a running elbow to crush Riddle. The logical bearhug goes on for a good while until Riddle fights out again. Some running shots in the corner are cut off by a toss across the ring but Riddle gets his feet up in the corner. The Floating Bro staggers Omos but the RKO is countered into the chokebomb for the pin at 3:51.

Rating: C-. These losses with Riddle trying so many of Orton’s moves and mannerisms could be leading somewhere, as I could see Orton being sick of Riddle losing using his stuff. Throw in Riddle dedicating a huge match to Orton and then losing and some seeds are being planted. Riddle vs. Orton is a huge match if that is where they want to go, and waiting so much longer makes it worth the effort. Or RKBro is back as the most over act on Raw. Kind of hard to lose either way there.

Post match Omos lays Riddle out again and leaves, with Seth Rollins coming to the ring. Rollins kicks him to the floor and laughs at Riddle for losing back to back matches. He promises to win the briefcase and cash it in on Roman Reigns, who has been ducking him since the Royal Rumble. The speech takes so long that Riddle gets back in, only to get kicked in the ribs and Stomped.

Here is Theory, on the pose down platform from last week, for a chat. After looking at a recap of Theory spraying baby oil on Bobby Lashley to blind him last week, Theory brags about how great he is and how no one can touch him. Next week is the twenty year celebration of John Cena but Cena’s time is up and Cena’s time is now. Theory does some poses but Lashley pops up behind him. Theory loads up the selfie and sees Lashley, who blinds him with the baby oil. The spear cuts Theory down and Lashley promises to take the US Title. Good segment here, as that selfie thing is a good way to go for Theory.

We recap Edge being thrown out of the Judgment Day a few weeks back.

Theory is annoyed about Bobby Lashley, who doesn’t deserve a US Title match. However, Adam Pearce has ruled that if Lashley can win a gauntlet match tonight, he gets the title shot at Money in the Bank. Three opponents to be named.

Jey Uso vs. Angelo Dawkins

Before the match, the Usos promise to keep smashing people and the Street Profits want to fight. Dawkins sends him into the corner to start for a spinning splash. Jey low bridges him to the floor though and there’s the suicide dive. Some right hands rock Dawkins and we take an early break. Back with Jey hitting a pop up neckbreaker for two but walking into the Silencer. A superkick drops Dawkins so Jey goes up top, only to dive into a Sky High for the pin at 7:20.

Rating: C. Not much to this one again and that isn’t surprising. It’s the same idea that we have seen time after time as WWE’s ability to book a tag feud continues to be more or less horrible. This does give the Profits a bit of momentum, but it isn’t like this is some great idea. Just get on with it and give us what should be a nice tag match at the pay per view.

We see Elias in the back playing guitar when Ezekiel comes in to say Elias is his #1 fan. They sit on a couch together, with Elias talking about going around the world, writing songs and playing shows. Elias says he is a changed man and won’t be insulting Nebraska when he goes out there. He is proud of what Ezekiel has done and hits the Walk With Elias catchphrase. They seem cool with each other, despite sitting on very opposite ends of the couch for no adequately explained reason.

Here is Elias in the ring for a concert. After hitting the catchphrase, Elias is ready for a song about Ezekiel but here is Kevin Owens to interrupt. Owens doesn’t buy any of this and accuses them of FAKING THE VIDEO. Owens: “I SAW A MOVIE WITH A T-REX IN IT LAST WEEK!” Ezekiel pops up on screen to say that they are different people and wishes Elias luck with the concert. Owens is a little bewildered and Elias sings about how he is back for one night and Owens is a liar. That’s enough for Owens, who goes after Elias but gets beaten down. The guitar to the back sends Owens bailing.

We cut to the back where Owens falls through the curtain and explains how Elias did all of that and blames Elias for everything. He wants to face Elias, Ezekiel or their younger brother Elrod next week….so here is Ezekiel to accept the challenge. Owens is so mad that he…sits down in a chair. Owens: “ELROD!!!”

Gauntlet Match

Bobby Lashley has to beat three opponents in a row to win here. First up it’s Chad Gable, who gets taken down to the mat without much effort. Back up and Lashley sends him flying with a suplex, followed by a running forearm to knock Gable outside. Gable gets posted and then rather delayed vertical suplexed back inside. The spear is countered into an ankle lock though and Lashley is in trouble. Back up and Gable hits the moonsault, only to have Lashley pop up and grab the Hurt Lock for the tap at 5:42.

Otis comes straight in to jump Lashley though and sends him into the barricade. A splash on the floor crushes Lashley and we take a break. Back with Otis grabbing a neck crank but missing a Vader bomb. The Downward Spiral plants Otis but he fights out of the Hurt Lock. Instead, Lashley hits the spear but Gable comes in for the DQ at 14:22 (total). The beatdown is on until Theory is the third man. Theory hammers away and loads up the A Town Down but Lashley reverses into a cradle for the pin at 16:44.

Rating: C. This is a great example of WWE overthinking something and screwing it up without needing to. You could have gotten the same result and more or less the same match by having this be a handicap with Otis and Gable instead of Theory. Have Theory jump in after the match and get speared or something, which gives you the same ending and no pinfall on the champ. But why do that when you have one idea and insist on running with it?

Bianca Belair isn’t surprised about Carmella getting the title shot and lists off her catchphrases until Carmella jumps her from behind. Belair is so annoyed that she gets up and stares.

It’s time for MizTV, with special guest AJ Styles. After Miz mocks Styles’ theme song, Miz talks about how Styles has been on a losing streak in recent weeks and calls AJ a failure. Miz insults the University of Nebraska but AJ sucks up to them, saying this is Cornhusker country. AJ thinks Miz must be annoyed with his popcorn sized testicles, but Miz insists that this WILL NOT become a thing. He brags about all of his success until AJ talks about how he has had some issues as of late. The brawl is on with Ciampa coming in to knock AJ outside. I like the visual, but do something with Ciampa other than having him start then lose.

Ciampa vs. AJ Styles

Miz is on commentary and Ciampa jumps Styles to start, setting up a running knee to the head. The chinlock goes on but Styles is back with the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. Ciampa is back with a right hand but the Fairy Tale Ending is countered with a backdrop. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Ciampa at 4:19.

Rating: C. Another match that should have been better and treated as a big deal but why do that when you can have Ciampa lose again? I know it’s a bunch of backstage politics nonsense, but you look around at the roster and decide that an NXT legend who looks great and can go isn’t worth anything? It’s another case of WWE not just accepting what is right in front of them and that is really, really frustrating.

Post match Styles lays out an invading Miz and steals his sunglasses.

Veer Mahaan talks about how awesome he is and promises more destruction. Fear him. I fear anything involving Veer so they’re off to a good start.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Becky jumps her on the stage but Asuka tries the armbar at the bell. That’s broken up but so is the Disarm-Her, allowing Asuka to kick away. They head up top with Becky knocking her down, only to get caught with a running kick to the face. Becky kicks her outside though and we take a break.

Back with Asuka hitting the hip attack and grabbing the ankle lock. With that broken up, Asuka hits a missile dropkick for two before they head to the apron. Becky stomps her way out of a powerbomb attempt but gets kneed out of the air for the double knockdown. They both beat the count back in, where Asuka blasts her with a kick to the head for the pin at 12:14.

Rating: B-. As usual, there is one match on this show that works because you have some talented people get in the ring and have their match. The problem again though is this is burning through another match between two of the top women in the division when you didn’t need to. Asuka vs. Becky is a big match, but not so much when it has been done so many times.

Becky freaks out to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a good example of a show where the majority of the show wasn’t so much bad, but rather a mixture of frustrating and boring. There was very little on this show that would make me want to see either next week’s show or the pay per view. You had a champion getting pinned when he didn’t need to, a bunch of rematches, a tag match between singles wrestlers and Ciampa losing again. It feels like they were playing Bingo with the most annoying and tried and false ideas that they have over and over again. Nothing show, and that’s a bad sign on the way to Money in the Bank.

Results
Carmella b. Becky Lynch, Asuka, Liv Morgan and Alexa Bliss – Superkick to Morgan
Omos b. Riddle – Chokebomb
Angelo Dawkins b. Jey Uso – Sky High
Bobby Lashley won a gauntlet match last eliminating Theory
AJ Styles b. Ciampa – Phenomenal Forearm
Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Kick to the head

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 13, 2022: Everyone Has A First Time

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 13, 2022
Location: Intrust Bank Arena, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Jimmy Smith

It’s the first Raw without Cody Rhodes in a bit and that doesn’t exactly leave us with a ton of options. The biggest problem would seem to be the lack of a main event star around here, but maybe we can find someone in the Money in the Bank qualifying matches. Let’s get to it.

Here is last week’s show if you need a recap.

We open with MizTV with special guest Paul Heyman. Miz talks about the Money in the Bank ladder match and puts over how important the briefcase can be, including his two wins. Heyman says that the percentages don’t matter because whoever wins is going to lose to Roman Reigns.

We hear about Reigns vs. Riddle on Friday, so here is Riddle to discuss various testicles. Riddle is ready to win the title on Friday but Heyman doesn’t think Riddle is even going to win tonight. As for Friday though, he can win, or he can never have another title shot ever. Heyman brings out the Usos but here are the Street Profits to uneven the odds.

Jimmy Uso vs. Montez Ford

Feeling out process to start with Jimmy knocking him down and getting a bit cocky. Back up and Ford takes him down with an armbar but Jimmy sends him to the apron and snaps off a suplex to put Ford in even more trouble. We take a break and come back with Jimmy staying on the ribs with a waistlock.

Ford flips out and starts kicking away, including a step up enziguri for two. The spinebuster gets two more on Jimmy but he’s right back with a pop up Samoan drop for the same. Ford is back up with a super hurricanrana to catch Jimmy on top but the frog splash hits knees, allowing Jimmy to get the pin at 12:51.

Rating: C. This was a nice singles match from both though the ending was only so good. I’m not entirely sure I can buy a countered splash as enough for a pin but it does make the impact of the splash look that much better. Ford getting a single match sounds like a good idea, though I’m not sure he’s ready for the singles push that people have been wanting for a long time.

We recap Seth Rollins showing respect to Cody Rhodes last week and then attacking him with a sledgehammer anyway.

We get a sitdown interview with Seth Rollins, who is asked if he feels any remorse over what he did. Of course not, because Rollins sees Cody as a virus. Sometimes you have to take matters into his own hands, like Rollins has a sledgehammer in his own hands. As for tonight, he wants to qualify for Money in the Bank and suggests using that sledgehammer on AJ Styles. Cue Styles to forearm Rollins, saying that was for Cody.

We look back at Dana Brooke beating Becky Lynch last week.

24/7 Title: Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Brooke is defending but gets jumped before the bell. Becky beats her down and says this isn’t about the 24/7 Title because she is tired of the disrespect. She thinks she should just win that Money in the Bank briefcase but for now, she’ll go after Brooke again. Cue Asuka for the brawl and Becky is cleared out. No match.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Alexa Bliss/Liv Morgan vs. Nikki Ash/Doudrop

Nikki now has new black and gold gear. Bliss takes Ash to start but it’s quickly off to Doudrop, who isn’t having anything of a headscissors. A backsplash crushes Bliss for two and it’s back to Nikki to hammer away. Nikki’s running bulldog is countered and it’s off to Morgan to clean house. Morgan hits a middle rope dropkick for two on Doudrop, allowing the tag back to Bliss for the running Blockbuster. Ash makes a fast save and everything breaks down, with a side slam/reverse DDT combination getting two on Bliss. The fight goes to the floor but Bliss grabs a DDT to finish Ash at 4:21.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here, but the important part is getting two potential Money in the Bank winners to qualify at the same time. There were a lot of spots to fill and now they have two more covered in the span of one match. That is more than you get most of the time, even if there was little doubt given who was on the other side of the ring.

We recap the Judgment Day shakeup from last week with Finn Balor knocking Edge out and seeming to take over.

Kevin Owens vs. Ezekiel

Owens knocks him into the corner and hits a Cannonball, setting up the Swanton for two at twenty seconds. Ezekiel is back and knocks Owens to the floor to take over, setting up a spinebuster for two back inside. That lets Ezekiel go up but Owens rolls away, which means Ezekiel goes outside with him.

An AA onto the steps knocks Owens silly and we take a break. Back with Owens holding a chinlock until his backsplash only hits Ezekiel’s raised knees. Ezekiel hits a running splash in the corner, followed by a jumping knee to put Owens on the floor again. Owens gets in a shot of his own but stops to yell at commentary, meaning Ezekiel wins by countout at 8:31.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as the structure was all over the place, with Owens starting so fast and then losing when he got too annoyed. The problem was that Ezekiel got in a bunch of offense in the middle and it wasn’t close to a squash. The action was ok, but the match wound up being a mess.

Post match Ezekiel says he wants Money in the Bank, but before that there is next week….and Elias will be back.

Video on John Cena visiting a non-verbal refugee in the Netherlands.

MVP vs. Cedric Alexander

Omos is here with MVP. Before the match, MVP says Alexander needs to learn that he is down here and Omos is up here, with the Money In The Bank briefcase. Cedric knocks him down to start and there’s the springboard Downward Spiral for an early two. An Omos distraction lets MVP hit a clothesline and Ballin gets two more. The Playmaker gives MVP the pin at 1:31.

AJ Styles is ready to beat Seth Rollins in a Money in the Bank qualifying match.

Rollins dedicates his match to Cody Rhodes.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Seth Rollins vs. AJ Styles

Styles slugs away to start and grabs some early rollups for two each. Rollins gets in a shot of his own but AJ sends him outside, setting up the slingshot forearm to the floor to drop Rollins again. Styles gets sent over the announcers’ table though and we take a break. Back with Styles striking away, setting up the belly to back faceplant for two. The low superkick gives Rollins the same but the Stomp is countered into the Calf Crusher.

That’s broken up but AJ grabs it again, this time sending Rollins over to the ropes. Back up and Rollins hits a discus forearm, only to have his buckle bomb countered into a suplex into the corner. Rollins is fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb but the frog splash only hits mat. The Styles Clash is loaded up but Rollins reverses into a sunset flip for the pin at 15:11.

Rating: B. We’ll call this another case of “what were you expecting”. These two could probably have a very good match in their sleep and that is what they did here, with Rollins winning to get back on track and Styles putting over someone else who is already a big star. That is kind of Styles’ thing as of late but at least Styles is done with Edge for the time being.

Riddle vs. Ciampa

Miz is on commentary. Riddle takes him down into a cross armbreaker to start, only to be sent into the corner for his efforts. Ciampa comes back with a shot of his own but has to escape Bro Derek. Another shot runs Riddle down but he wins a strike off and hits the Orton scoop powerslam. The hanging DDT gets the same but Ciampa grabs an ankle lock. The running knee to the face gives Ciampa two but Riddle hits his own knee. The RKO finishes Ciampa at 4:35.

Rating: C. What is Ciampa supposed to be in WWE? He is a big enough star that he is consistently on Raw and some people seem to think something of him, but he has been treated as a loser for weeks. What was the point in bringing him up if this is the best they have for him? Other than crushing another HHH guy of course.

Bianca Belair is sick of Rhea Ripley and promises to shut her up at Money In The Bank. Judgment Day pops up on screen to recap getting rid of Edge and seems rather happy with it. Ripley promises to take the Women’s Title from Belair.

Theory is ready to beat Bobby Lashley in a pose down tonight.

John Cena is back in two weeks.

Chad Gable vs. Mustafa Ali

Otis is here with Gable, who takes Ali down without much effort. Ali hurricanranas him into an armdrag but he misses a charge into the middle buckle for a nasty crash. The bow and arrow hold goes on but Ali slips out without much trouble. Gable misses the moonsault though, allowing Ali to hit a running clothesline. The tornado DDT connects but Otis offers a distraction, allowing Gable to hit Chaos Theory for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: C+. I’m glad to see Ali back on TV but I don’t think there is any reason to believe that things are going to get better for him than this. WWE is not going to give Ali much of a chance to do anything after his disagreement with the company and while it is sad, it certainly isn’t that surprising. I mean, he’s losing to Gable on Raw. How much worse can it be?

We look back at Veer Mahaan taking out Dominik Mysterio.

Veer Mahaan vs. Rey Mysterio

Dominik is here too. Rey goes for the leg to start but gets taken down with a single shot. Veer sends him chest first to the floor for the crash, followed by the chest first whip into the corner back inside. A missed charge sends Veer into the post and out to the floor, where he beats up Dominik for fun. Back in and Veer spins him into a faceplant, setting up the Cervical Clutch to make Rey tap at 3:39.

Rating: C. If there is a point coming to this seemingly never ending feud, I’m not seeing it. Mahaan has wrecked both Mysterios multiple times now but for some reason we are seeing it again and again. How long are they supposed to do it before WWE gives up? So far it has been two plus months, so I guess about that long plus.

And now, a pose down between Bobby Lashley and Theory. They both get to do the same three poses, with Theory looking fine but being outmatched. Lashley wins, but Theory sprays baby oil in his eyes and dropkicks him. This could have been a segment at 9:14 on any given week and far from the closing of Raw.

Overall Rating: C-. This was right back to the norm for Raw: a bunch of stuff that we have covered before without anything that you really need to see. Couple that with a pretty dreadful last half hour and there was no reason to care about this show. Money in the Bank got a little build, but I still have no idea why I should want to see a bunch of qualifying matches for a ladder match for a title shot that might not have happened a year from now.

Results
Jey Uso b. Montez Ford – Countered frog splash
Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop/Nikki Ash – DDT to Ash
Ezekiel b. Kevin Owens via countout
MVP b. Cedric Alexander – Playmaker
Seth Rollins b. AJ Styles – Sunset flip
Riddle b. Ciampa – RKO
Chad Gable b. Mustafa Ali – Rolling Chaos Theory
Veer Mahaan b. Rey Mysterio – Cervical Clutch

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – November 27, 2007: Mini Monster Mash

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: November 27, 2007
Location: Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re almost to the end of the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean around here. ECW is in need of something different and unfortunately I think we have already gotten that. Kane and Big Daddy V seem to be the next big things, though some of the Smackdown people can help. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla

Layla chokes on the rope to start and we are firmly in catfight mode. Cue Balls Mahoney for a distraction though, allowing Kelly to grab a rollup for the fast pin.

Video on Big Daddy V.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. The bell rings and Festus chases Miz and Morrison off but we settle down to Jesse working on Morrison’s arm. A running dropkick to the side of the head gets two and it’s off to Festus for a splash. Jesse is slammed onto Morrison for two more so Miz comes in, only to get front facelocked. Morrison tries to make a save but gets glared at by Festus, who clotheslines both of them out to the floor.

After Jesse’s dive onto Miz and Morrison and a break, we come back with Morrison hitting a slingshot elbow for two on Jesse. The chinlock with a knee in Jesse’s back keeps him in trouble and we hit something like a cobra clutch. Jesse finally gets up and rolls away, allowing the hot tag to Festus to clean house. The rocket launch forearm hits Jesse for two but Morrison is back in with a cheap shot for the quick pin.

Rating: C. Watchable enough match as Miz and Morrison continue to clean out what limited competition that they have. There still isn’t enough to make a full on division but even a few teams are better than champions and their challengers of the month. Outsmarting Jesse and Festus is the best way to go with them, though I’m waiting on someone to just grab the bell and ring it to cut him off.

Video on Kane.

We look back at the women’s match.

Smackdown Rebound.

Elijah Burke introduces Shelton Benjamin, who wants to be ECW World Champion.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Shannon Moore

Benjamin twists the arm and grabs a belly to belly to start, setting up a t-bone suplex. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Moore flips out of a suplex. A slingshot something is countered into the jumping Downward Spiral to give Benjamin another fast win.

Rating: C-. What else can you say here? It’s a squash for Benjamin, who seems to be the newest star who is going to be added to the show for the sake of bolstering the roster. That is what ECW needs, and even though Benjamin’s blond hair is a bad idea, it’s nice to see Benjamin getting another chance. Nothing match, but what else were you expecting?

Kane vs. Big Daddy V

Extreme Rules and Matt Striker is here with V. Kane slugs away but his running clothesline doesn’t do him much good. V sends him outside, where the stick that Striker picks up is quickly taken away. Back in and V beats him down, setting up some standing on the ribs. Kane gets in a shot of his own and starts bringing in the weapons, only to be crushed all over again. A big boot knocks the chair into V’s face though and the middle rope clothesline puts him down.

They head outside, where V hits a loud chop up against the barricade, followed by a tackle through a table in the corner to crush Kane. Another table is set up in the middle of the ring but Kane slugs away and tries a choke. Some kendo stick shots don’t work but a trashcan shot does stagger V. Cue Mark Henry to jump Kane from behind though and the double beatdown is on. Kane is chokeslammed/spinebustered through the table to give V the win.

Rating: C. Another power brawl here but the ending does open the doors for Kane to need to find a partner to fight the monsters. I don’t know who that is going to be because Undertaker is busy with anything else, but that could make for more than a few different ideas. Now just find a way around the fact that it’s a Big Daddy V match and it should be ok.

Posing ensues to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Here’s the latest pretty much nothing edition of ECW and I’m not particularly surprised. There are some stories, but you are only going to get so far with the roster that they have. ECW is comprised of a bunch of up and comers, people who haven’t been proven yet and wrestlers with nothing else to do. That doesn’t make for a very good show, but it is all they have at the moment.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 6, 2022: I’ll Take It For A Week

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 6, 2022
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are done with Hell In A Cell and that means we are done with Cody Rhodes for the time being. Rhodes defeated Seth Rollins in the main event last night but did so with a torn pectoral muscle. We won’t be seeing him for a long time, so now the question is what happens on the road to Money In The Bank. I’m sure that song will ensue. Let’s get to it.

Here is Hell In A Cell if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last night’s Cell match, featuring Cody somehow not losing an arm.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Here is Cody Rhodes for a chat. After welcoming us to the show, Cody talks about how it is a privilege to do what he does. Cody talks about his daughter and how he wants her to know that in the darkest part of his career, he stood and fought. He did it against one of the best ever in Seth Rollins (Cody: “Yeah I don’t like him either.”) and now the book is closed.

With that out of the way, he wants to talk about what’s above him, which would be the Money in the Bank briefcase. It has eluded him throughout his career, but if he were to retrieve the briefcase and win it, he would be the WWE Undisputed Universal Champion (that needs a new name).

Cue a limping Seth Rollins to interrupt and say that while he doesn’t like Cody, after last night, he respects him. Rollins says Dusty is proud of his baby boy right now and they shake (left) hands. Rollins whispers something we can’t hear and limps away, leaving Cody looking a bit taken aback. Cody gets the long walk up the ramp….and Rollins hits him in the back of the head with a sledgehammer. A stomp on the peck and some pokes with the hammer later, Rollins leaves him alone. There’s Rollins getting his heat back after last night.

Post break, Cody pulls himself up and refuses the stretcher.

Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

The bell rings and here are the 24/7 goons, with Brooke winning the title. Becky grabs the mic and says this isn’t happening, so right now she’s challenging for the 24/7 Title, with promises of violence against anyone who interferes. Call this a no contest at about 1:00.

24/7 Title: Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Brooke is defending and gets Bexploded to start. Cue Asuka for a distraction though and the rollup…actually only gets two. Becky blasts Brooke with a clothesline but Brooke is back with the handspring elbow. The Swanton misses though and Becky kicks her in the face. The Manhandle Slam is countered though and Asuka grabs Becky’s leg so Brooke can retain the title at 2:13.

John Cena is coming back on June 27.

It’s time for MizTV, featuring the return of Maryse. Miz hypes her up and talks about how great she is before talking about the premiere of the new season of MizTV. Cue Riddle, tonight’s guest, to interrupt and stumble through some French. Maryse speaks some better French and Riddle says gesundheit. Riddle says hi to Randy Orton and hopes he is back soon…unlike his stepdad. With that out of the way, Miz says Orton’s career is over and he isn’t coming back.

That’s too far for Riddle, who is tired of fighting Roman Reigns’ minions every week. He wants Reigns himself and he’s going to take the title from him. Riddle finds it funny that John Cena is playing Peacemaker while Miz is playing homemaker, while Maryse leads him around by the testicles. This sets off a discussion of the size of Miz’s testicles, with Riddle saying prove it. Miz looks disturbed so Riddle asks for a match right now. Miz, in a tuxedo, says no but here is Ciampa to jump Riddle from behind. Sure, Miz is down for the match.

Miz vs. Riddle

Joined in progress with Riddle in trouble but he makes a pretty quick comeback. Riddle gets sent outside where he pulls off Miz’s pants, leaving Maryse to send in the (seemingly) loaded purse. That’s cut off with an RKO to give Riddle the pin at 2:13.

We look at NXT In Your House, which was a pretty good show.

Street Profits vs. Usos

Non-title Championship Contenders match. Dawkins rolls Jimmy up a few times for some early near falls before hitting the jumping elbow for two more. A double flapjack gives Ford his own two and the Usos need a breather. The Usos need a breather on the floor before Jey comes in, only to get taken down by Dawkins as well. Back in and Jey gets knocked off the top for a crash and we take a break.

We take a break and come back with Dawkins in trouble, including the running hip attack in the corner. Dawkins is sent outside for a whip into the steps and we take a rather fast second break. Back again with Jey running Ford over for two but Ford sends him outside. That means the parade of dives, including Dawkins hitting the big running flip dive. Back in and the spinebuster into the frog splash gives Ford two, with Jimmy making a last second save. They fight to the floor and it’s Ford diving back in to beat the count for the win at 16:28.

Rating: C+. The two breaks in the middle didn’t help things but at least a regular team is getting a title match at some point. I’ll take that over the next thrown together team, as you can only do so much with them. The Profits are one of the better teams around today so go with someone who might be a threat to the titles.

We look back at Seth Rollins attacking Cody Rhodes earlier today.

Here is Bobby Lashley for a chat. He talks about the history he has with MVP but even MVP and Omos couldn’t take him out. So what is next for Lashley? Cue Theory of all people to interrupt, because he doesn’t like being interrupted. Lashley doesn’t like this and is ready to fight but Theory wants to show off his bicep. Lashley is fine with that and shows Theory a bigger one. The challenge is on for the US Title shot but Theory doesn’t think Lashley has earned it. Theory says Lashley has never beaten him so Lashley kicks him to the floor.

Veer Mahaan vs. Dominik Mysterio

Rey Mysterio is at ringside. Dominik starts fast and gets Veer a bit frustrated with the chasing. A dropkick through the ropes staggers Veer and a kick to the face makes it worse. Back in and Veer blasts him with a jumping clothesline before knocking Dominik outside. Dominik gets thrown into Rey, with Veer kicking Rey in the mask to make it worse.

We take a break and come back with Dominik fighting out of a neck crank and starting the comeback. A missed charge in the corner lets Dominik hit a 619 to send Veer’s head into the post. The frog splash connects for two, but Veer is back up with the Million Dollar Arm. The Cervical Clutch is loaded up but Rey comes in for the DQ at 9:14.

Rating: C-. Can we just wrap this story up already? It started all the way back in April and now it just keeps going. If WWE wants to do something with Mahaan, then have him crush the Mysterios for good so they can move on to anything else. Mahaan is only so interesting in the first place and dragging this out over and over isn’t helping him.

Here is Judgment Day to announce their newest member. Damian Priest says ALL RISE and Rhea Ripley talks about how they love power. Edge is proud of the two of them and announces the newest member of the team: Finn Balor. Edge is rather pleased and asks how this happened. Balor talks about how there was clarity last week, because joining Judgment Day was a calling. Now he can finally see clearly and after last night’s loss, Balor reached out to talk about how things have been going.

Balor didn’t realize how similar they were, with Priest saying that they are ready to shake off the last issues with Judgment Day….which is Edge. Priest decks Edge and the other three lay him out, with Balor adding the Coup de Grace. A Razor’s Edge toss sends Edge through the announcers’ table but we’re not done yet. The Crossface with the chair bar has Edge in more trouble and there’s the Conchairto to knock Edge out again.

Omos vs. Cedric Alexander

Chokebomb finishes Cedric in 7 seconds.

Post match Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode return but MVP isn’t happy with them stealing Omos’ spotlight. Ziggler superkicks MVP but the two of them run off from Omos.

Otis vs. Ezekiel

Chad Gable is here with Otis, who powers Ezekiel into the corner to start. There’s the t-bone suplex to send Ezekiel down, setting up the neck crank. Ezekiel fights up and strikes away, including a jumping knee into an enziguri to finish Otis at 2:19.

Post match Ezekiel grabs the mic and talks about how Kevin Owens disrespected him. Next week, he wants a rematch so here is Owens to agree, with one condition: Ezekiel has to admit that he is Elias. Ezekiel admits that his name is Elias, which has Owens very happy. The rematch is on, but Ezekiel says that he was lying. A jumping knee leaves Owens laying.

We look at Bianca Belair retaining the Raw Women’s Title last night.

Alexa Bliss vs. Doudrop vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Liv Morgan

The winner gets Bianca Belair, at ringside, at Money in the Bank. Morgan and Bliss are knocked outside to start, leaving us with Ripley and Doudrop slugging it out. Ripley gets the better of things but Morgan and Bliss pull Doudrop out to the floor. Morgan and Bliss get back in to double team Ripley, who isn’t having any of that. Morgan is sent outside, leaving Ripley to stomp away. The delayed suplex is broken up by Morgan but Doudrop runs everyone over and we take a break.

Back with Doudrop beating on Bliss and hitting a clothesline for two. Morgan and Ripley pop back in with Morgan hammering away in the corner, setting up the middle rope hurricanrana. Doudrop is back up with a sitout powerbomb for two on Monday with Bliss making the save.

They all go to the corner and it’s a Tower Of Doom to bring everyone back down in a crash. Bliss and Morgan are up first for the exchange of rollups for two each. Twisted Bliss hits knees though, leaving Morgan to load up the Oblivion to Doudrop. Nikki Ash makes the save though, leaving Doudrop to Michinoku Driver Liv. Ripley makes a save of her own and it’s Riptide to Doudrop for the pin at 14:18.

Rating: C+. I don’t think there was any serious question about the winner here as Ripley is in the big stable and the team needs something to make them look more important. You don’t have her lose a match so soon to take away their momentum so this was the right way to go. Doudrop isn’t doing anything anyway so they went with the right option, with Morgan and Bliss being spared from taking an unnecessary fall.

Belair and Ripley stare each other down and the rest of Judgment Day come in to join Ripley to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. You know, I really didn’t dislike this show and a lot of that was due to it feeling like things were happening. They had some fresh stories, or at least some fresh matches, which is more than I can say about the last few weeks. It was far from a great show and I have no confidence that it is going to continue, but we didn’t get a bunch of Money in the Bank stuff and they had a surprise with the Judgment Day thing, so I’ll call this a success.

Results
Dana Brooke vs. Becky Lynch went to a no contest
Dana Brooke b. Becky Lynch – Rollup with Asuka holding the leg
Riddle b. Miz – RKO
Street Profits b. Usos via countout
Veer Mahaan b. Dominik Mysterio via DQ when Rey Mysterio interfered
Omos b. Cedric Alexander – Chokebomb
Ezekiel b. Otis – Crucifix
Rhea Ripley b. Liv Morgan, Alexa Bliss and Doudrop – Riptide to Doudrop

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – May 30, 2022: In A Word, Frustrating

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 30, 2022
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith

It’s the go home show for Hell In A Cell and there are four matches announced for the card. I’m not sure what they are waiting for with adding on more matches, but you have to think that something takes place this week. However, it is also Memorial Day, meaning there is a good chance that very little is going to happen here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Becky Lynch to get things going. She hasn’t been out here to start things off in a bit and she knows the people here are glad she has lost everything. Lynch doesn’t care what these people think, because she collects enemies. We flash back to Money in the Bank 2020, with Asuka winning the briefcase. Then Lynch handed her the Raw Women’s Title because she had to go become a mother.

That made Asuka a selfish monster….and here is Asuka to interrupt. She mocks Becky for being a baby and promises to win the title on Sunday. Cue Bianca Belair, who isn’t happy with Asuka kicking her last week and isn’t too fond of Becky either. She is sure the title isn’t going anywhere though and the fight is on, with Asuka hip attacking Becky to the floor, leaving the other two in the ring.

Asuka vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title and Becky Lynch is on commentary. They flip and jump over each other to start until Asuka kicks her in the ribs. Back up and Belair gets to the middle rope where she, as always, tells Asuka what she can kiss. After the backflip over Asuka, Belair gets pulled down for a kneebar, followed by a guillotine choke. That’s reversed into a suplex for two but another suplex sends both of them crashing to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Asuka hitting a German suplex into the running hip attack for two. Belair catches her on top though, only to moonsault backwards, allowing Asuka to hit a middle rope dropkick for two. A missed charge in the corner lets Belair try the KOD, but Asuka flips out and lands on her feet. Asuka comes up holding her knee though (Becky is VERY pleased) and needs a breather on the floor. Back in and a quick knee gives Asuka two but the Asuka Lock is countered. Asuka tries a rollup, which is quickly stacked up to give Belair the pin at 13:05.

Rating: C+. This match and the last segment let me figure out what I don’t care for with Belair. Her matches are usually good (this one was) and she can do things no one else can do, but none of her matches feel natural. Every time she does something it feels like it’s “ok, time to do this” or “this is where I do thing #3”. Between the kiss it deal or the moonsault off the ropes or the dance or whatever, it feels like she is walking step by step through a script that was planned in advance. It feels robotic and very rarely does she shake that off.

Post match Becky comes in and lays them both out.

Mysterios/Ezekiel vs. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy

Gable headlocks Rey to start but can’t hold onto him, allowing Dominik to come in instead. Dominik takes Gable to the corner and runs the ropes for a wristdrag. Everything breaks down and a triple dropkick sends Otis outside. Gable knocks Dominik off the ropes though and a whip sends him into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Rey dropkicking Owens to break up a Sharpshooter, allowing the tag to Ezekiel. Everything breaks down and Ezekiel cleans house with some Stinger Splashes. A spinning powerbomb gets two on Gable and a hurricanrana sets up a missed 610 on Owens. That leaves Owens to superkick Gable by mistake and it’s a double 619 to rock Gable again. Ezekiel’s spinning suplex finishes Gable at 8:32.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice action here and that shouldn’t be a surprise. Owens losing it more and more over Ezekiel is some nice stuff, even if it makes me want to watch Bobby Heenan trying to find out who Giant Machine really is. I’m still not caring about the Mysterios all that much, but at least it’s better than watching them deal with Veer Mahaan.

Post match Owens is ticked and wrecks the announcers’ table as the Academy isn’t pleased.

We recap Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins.

Here is Cody for a chat. Cody talks about having the potential to do great things and how his father knew how to see that potential in others. His father told him about the potential in Seth Rollins and then one day Cody was facing Rollins at Wrestlemania. That made Cody nervous, because he couldn’t come back with a loss. Cody didn’t lose there and he didn’t lose at Wrestlemania Backlash.

Now they’re going to the Cell and Cody is going to be able to lose all of his self control because Rollins will be locked inside with a man who wants to hurt him. Cue Rollins to interrupt through the crowd to say he just doesn’t like Cody. All Rollins hears in his sleep is CODY CODY CODY and he can’t stand it any longer.

Six years ago, Cody left WWE and found some friends who wanted to tear down everything Rollins built. Now Cody is back, but he doesn’t get to tear down Rollins’ kingdom. You don’t get to take a sledgehammer to Rollins’ throne and then try to take it from him. On Sunday, Rollins is going to end him and we can wake up from this American nightmare. Cody asks what is stopping him from coming after Seth right now.

Rollins seems to have reality set in on him and Cody takes the jacket off. Rollins comes to the barricade but turns away, only to have Cody come a charging. They fight back to ringside with Cody driving him through the barricade. Referees break it up but they keep fighting, then referees break it up but they keep fighting. They’re finally split apart and kept apart as the fans approve. As they should, as this was the kind of personal brawl that they needed. Rollins now has given a reason to hate Cody and that opens things up a lot more. Good stuff.

Doudrop vs. Alexa Bliss

Nikki Ash is here with Doudrop. Bliss gets powered into the corner and taken down for an early two. Back up and Bliss headscissors her into the corner, setting up a some basement dropkicks. Doudrop runs her over again but misses a Vader Bomb, allowing Bliss to go up, take out Ash, and hit Twisted Bliss for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: D+. I can’t get over how ridiculous the Nikki visuals are, as you have Bliss in the standard (or close enough) gear, Doudrop as the monster, and Ash still in the superhero gear. The match itself was your usual big vs. little match, which only kind of works most of the time. I don’t quite buy Bliss pinning Doudrop after a splash but it isn’t like Doudrop has meant anything in months.

Last week, MVP beat Bobby Lashley and made the Lashley vs. Omos match on Sunday into a handicap match.

It’s time for MizTV, because it feels like we have one of these every week. Miz plugs the season premiere of MizTV next week but here are the Street Profits to interrupt. They talk about Hell in a Cell on Sunday and hype up the card but realize they need to ask Miz about the show. Miz is ready to answer but IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT HE THINKS. Miz puts his hand up and they mock him asking what that means.

Then the 24/7 goons come running in and the Profits get involved as well. It turns into a multi person brawl until Tamina hits a Samoan drop on Dana Brooke to win the title. Tamina picks Akira Tozawa up and kisses him, only to get taken down in a backslide to give Tozawa the pin and the title. So what in the world was the original point of this segment again?

We recap Mustafa Ali’s issues since he came back to WWE as he tries to win the US Title.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ciampa

Theory is on commentary and if Ali wins, he gets a US Title shot. Ali sends him into the corner to start but Ciampa is right back with a knee to the face for two. Ciampa elbows him down and grabs a chinlock before stomping on Ali’s head. The second chinlock doesn’t last as long as Ali is back up with a kick to the face to send Ciampa outside. There’s a suicide dive, with Ali almost going head first into the announcers’ table. Ali goes up but Theory pulls him off the ropes for the DQ at 3:24.

Rating: C-. Well at least Ciampa didn’t get pinned again. I know it’s false hope but my goodness I was hoping he could do SOMETHING on the show. Instead, he might as well be in the corner to my left, because he is little more than a background guy while the real stars are out there. Nothing match, but at least Ali and Theory are getting to do something.

Post match, Theory lays out Ali and says we’ll do the title match right now. Oh and Ciampa disappeared because he means nothing.

US Title: Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Theory is defending and Ali pulls himself up, only to get thrown back down. A whip into the corner rocks Ali again but he manages a superkick. Ali goes up but gets crotched, setting up the A Town Down to retain the title at 1:43.

Hold on though as here is Adam Pearce to say let’s run it back on Sunday.

Riddle and Shinsuke Nakamura dub themselves the Bronin and Ronin and promise to take the Tag Team Titles.

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Riddle

Non-title but a CHAMPIONS CONTENDERS match. Jey gets taken into the wrong corner to start and it’s time for alternating kicks to put him in trouble. That’s broken up and it’s off to Jimmy for a Samoan drop. Jey comes back in to whip Riddle hard into the corner but another kick gets Riddle out of trouble. Nakamura comes back in with Good Vibrations to Jimmy. There’s the sliding German suplex but Jey comes back in to cut Nakamura off. The Superfly Splash gives Jey two and we take a break.

Back with Nakamura getting over to Riddle for the hot tag but the hanging DDT is broken up. Nakamura tags himself back in as Riddle is being suplexed to the floor and it’s Kinshasa to Jey. Jimmy makes a save to leave everyone down but it’s Riddle back in with the snap powerslams. Now the hanging DDT can plant Jey, only to have Jimmy hit Riddle with the scooter for the DQ at 11:35.

Rating: C+. Thirty minutes or so? Is that how long it was since they did THE EXACT SAME ENDING? You have a match for a title shot and someone gets disqualified to earn said title shot and they do it TWICE IN THREE MATCHES??? That is another level of lame booking and I can’t even be shocked that they did it. The match itself was good as you probably expected, but that ending was so dumb that it took away any interest I had in what they were doing.

Post match Nakamura breaks up the double Superfly Splash and Riddle hits the super RKO on Jimmy.

Mustafa Ali is ready for his title match on Sunday. He keeps getting knocked down but he is going keep getting back up and win the US Title in his hometown. Then Theory jumps him again and takes a selfie with the title over Ali. Normally this would set up a big title win for Ali, but I’d hope you aren’t that gullible.

Hell In A Cell rundown, including Judgment Day vs. AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan.

Video on Memorial Day.

Liv Morgan vs. Rhea Ripley

Morgan has been standing in the ring for about ten minutes now, following Ali’s promo, the pay per view rundown, a commercial and the Memorial Day video. Ripley had it better, having only stood there for the commercial and Memorial Day video. Morgan gets knocked into the corner to start but comes back with a choke. Some rams into the corner can’t break it up so Ripley drops backwards onto her for the real break. Ripley takes it to the floor and puts Liv on the apron, only to get caught in a hurricanrana. That isn’t working for Morgan either though as she gets dropped on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Morgan in trouble as Damian Priest and AJ Styles are at ringside. Ripley yells about how Liv dragged her down to her level as I would like to again point out YOU WERE A TEAM FOR A MONTH AND A HALF! STOP ACTING LIKE IT WAS SOMETHING! Morgan fights up and sends her outside for a high crossbody but Priest trips Morgan up. Styles cuts that off and Morgan reverses Riptide into a Backstabber for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C-. Sure why not. You have Ripley, who is FINALLY getting pushed as the monster that she should be and she loses to perennial loser Liv Morgan to set up a six person tag on Sunday. Morgan even overcomes the interference to win to make it even worse. I’m sure Ripley will be fine, but my goodness stop giving people losses like this and the acting like they mean nothing.

Post match Priest takes out Styles. Cue Finn Balor to take him out, allowing Morgan to dropkick Ripley so our plucky band of heroes can stand tall.

We look at the Cody/Seth brawl again.

And now, a contract signing because yes, this is how we’re ending the show. Bobby Lashley, Omos and MVP all come to the ring with Adam Pearce in charge. MVP promises to destroy Lashley in the Cell and says there is no Almighty Era without him. This Sunday, it ends once and for all. MVP signs and he hands it to Omos to do the same. Lashley says he never needed MVP but MVP says he’s talking too much so sign the contract.

The contract is signed and Pearce goes to wrap it up but MVP says we’re not waiting for Sunday. Security comes in and are cleared out just as fast…and here is Cedric Alexander to help take Lashley down. That’s fine with Lashley, who drops Alexander but gets kicked in the face by Omos. A table is set up in the corner and Omos loads up the powerslam, only to have Lashley slip out and spear him through it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a great example of a show where the wrestling itself worked but everything else dragged it down. Having two matches end in DQ to set up title matches, with a title match squeezed in between, is hardly thought out planning and they kept the dumb rolling by having Morgan beat Ripley. If you want to do something with Morgan, send out ANYONE other than Ripley for her to beat. Were Sonya Deville and Carmella busy?

That being said, there were good parts of the show, including the Cody vs. Seth brawl and a fair few of the matches. The problem, as usual, was most of that last hour, as it is clear that they are front loading the show and ending it with the lamer stuff. That makes for a very long time to wrap things up and that was the case again here. While there was good wrestling, it was surrounded by stuff that was either annoying or just bad, and that makes for a pretty frustrating show.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Asuka – Rollup
Mysterios/Ezekiel b. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy – Twisting suplex to Gable
Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop – Twisted Bliss
Mustafa Ali b. Ciampa via DQ when Theory interfered
Theory b. Mustafa Ali – A Town Down
Riddle/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Usos via DQ when Jimmy used the scooter
Liv Morgan b. Rhea Ripley – Backstabber

 

 

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