Monday Night Raw
Date: March 14, 2011
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
Guest Star: Snooki

After last week’s pretty good show, we’re here with the first of the final three Raws before Mania.  With 20 days to go, things started to looks up last week as Miz got serious and Cena apparently is done talking to Rock.  Also tonight it’s Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus in a title vs. job match which should be fun.  Let’s get to it.

Oh and Snooki is here tonight too.  Dang it all.

We open with a picture of the Rock and hear him talking to the president.  He makes fun of Cena’s promo last week, saying it wasn’t funny and that Cena talks like a child.  Cena’s music hits and Rock says he’ll have to call the President back.  Rock talks to someone off camera, saying that Cena is a man for coming to see him.

And it’s a kid.  The kid is in a Cena shirt and raps a bit but Rock says that Cena has to talk like an adult.  Rock sits down and makes fun of “Cena”, saying that while Cena has run with the ball since Rock is gone, he hasn’t run that far.  At the end of the day, it comes down to the fact that Cena simply isn’t that talented.

Rock says it doesn’t matter how that makes him feel and Cena starts crying.  Rock says that the fans should be crying after seeing Cena’s movies.  The Rock gives him a gift: a box of Fruity Pebbles.  This is absolutely hilarious by the way.  After sending the kid away, Rock turns to the camera and turns his attention to the Miz.

They haven’t been introduced and Miz claims to be the most must see WWE Champion in history.  Well he’s the Rock, the most electrifying man in all of entertainment.  There’s this ominous music playing in the background at the same time.  Miz hit the People’s Elbow and insulted his family.  That statement means that Miz wants the biggest whipping of all time.  Rock says the time for talking is done and before Mania he will be on Raw.  Cena needs to shut his mouth.  The smack will be laid down, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Trish is in the back with Snooki.  Someone get me my gun that I don’t own.

All three commentators are here and Cole is in his own glass/plastic box.  That’s hilarious.  Oh and it’s called the Cole Mine.  Great stuff.  There’s no top on it.

Here’s Miz and we get a clip of three weeks ago when Miz and Cena won the tag titles.  Also we see the end of the cage match and of last week’s show.  In present time Miz says that Rock’s shirt says I Bring It.  That’s true as he brings bad movies, weak catchphrases and long diatribes of a has been.  Miz runs down Rock’s family because he’s WWE Champion, making him better than them.

Rock likes to make six year olds cry.  Miz says Rock should step into this ring as Miz will make Rock cry.  Rock doesn’t own Cena, the Miz does.  Miz says that he hopes Rock brings it here to St. Louis, but if Rock does he’ll be overshadowed by Miz.  The catchphrase seems to end the commercial but we have an e-mail.

Cole has to leave the box to get to the podium and Lawler blocks his way.  Apparently Jerry is going to read them tonight.  There are two first time ever matches tonight: one for Cena and one for Miz.  Cena faces Alberto Del Rio and Miz faces the Great Khali.  I would have bet on HHH but I guess they’re saving that for Mania.  Miz vs. Khali is next.

The Miz vs. Great Khali

 

Naturally Khali dominates to start.  Cole is already getting on my verves by ignoring Lawler every time he talks.  Khali gets the big overhead chop and locks in the vice less than a minute in.  Miz’s face being all crushed is hilarious.  Miz gets the rope and Riley runs in for the DQ (wasn’t he fired?) at 1:14.  Miz destroys Khali with a chair Austin style post match.  DDT on the chair ends it.  Miz actually BROKE the chair, as in one of the legs is hanging off.  There’s a gash in Khali’s back too which I can’t imagine is fake.

Cole is going to expose Lawler tonight with a special guest.

Orton vs. Ryan later.

We see the HHH video from Smackdown which is designed to make HHH look like a tough guy.  That isn’t that hard to do.

John Morrison is talking to Snooki.  Dang it he had potential.  She offers him a spot of Jersey Shore.  Vickie and Dolph come up and make fun of Snooki.  Apparently Vickie was offered the cover of Playboy.  Snooki makes a fat joke and blocks a slap to hit Vickie and we take a break.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

 

There’s a graphic with an American flag and fireworks for the US Title.  Cool.  If Sheamus loses he quits.  Gail Kim is with Bryan here.  Sheamus looked angry about the idea of the stipulation even though it was his idea I believe.  Sheamus takes over early as we talk about the possibility of the curse of being King of the Ring.  Bryan moonsaults over Sheamus and tries the LeBell Lock but Sheamus escapes.

Suicide Dive to the floor takes down Sheamus and a missile dropkick takes down the Irishman for two.  Sheamus hits the floor again and looks lost as we take a break.  Back with Sheamus in control of Bryan, mainly focusing on his back.  Bryan grabs a small package for two and sends Sheamus to the floor.  Sheamus may have hurt his ankle again just like last week.

He makes it back in this week but the Brogue Kick misses and Bryan grabs the LeBell Lock.  Sheamus grabs the ropes and tries the High Cross.  Bryan rolls through it for two and they slug it out with Bryan taking him down.  BIG kick to the head gets a long two.  Bryan goes up but jumps into the Brogue Kick which ends Bryan’s title reign at 9:00.  Sweet ending.

Rating: B. This was a good TV match with both guys coming off looking good.  Sheamus is arguably a bigger star than Bryan so it’s not like this is a major upset.  The kick looked great too so it’s not like some weak move ended it.  Good TV match too and it got some good time with some hard hitting shots.  Good stuff.

Cole says he’s going to commit Regicide (killing of a king) tonight and his guest is up next.

After a recap of last week’s segment with JBL, Cole and Austin.  Cole is in the ring and says that Jerry gets defensive about his family.  Tonight Cole isn’t going to talk about Lawler’s family because Lawler’s family is going to talk about Lawler.  Cue Brian freaking Christopher, looking like a slim Dusty Rhodes with a beard with a distance.  Christopher cuts a total heel promo, saying how Lawler never wanted a family or a son and when Christopher made it to WWE, Lawler didn’t acknowledge that Christopher was his son.

Lawler grabs the mic and says that he’s glad Christopher never went by Brian Lawler, because he’s a bigger screw up than Charlie Sheen, proven by him associating with Michael Cole.  Brian asks his dad how it feels that his son was at Wrestlemania before Lawler did as one of the biggest stars in the company as part of Too Cool (just go with it).  Christopher gets in his face and Lawler just sits there and takes it.  Cole says this proves that Lawler is a loser.

CUE JR of all people who says that Cole has gone too far with everything and that Cole needs to come to his senses.  Cole says that Ross needs to just go away and that he’s the voice of the WWE and not Jim Ross.  Ross has wanted to talk to him about that, because the voice of the WWE is that of the fans, not one person.  Lawler has been carrying Cole like a baby kangaroo in his mother’s pouch.  Ross says Cole isn’t cuddly like a kangaroo though.  He’s a rat bastard.

Cole talks about how this is what he always expected: Ross leaving Cole in his Cole’s ring like a coward.  JR takes the jacket and tie off and is ready to fight.  As he gets ready, Swagger jumps Lawler and then hits the ring to beat up Ross and put on the ankle lock.  Lawler gets up and hammers Swagger but Cole jumps on Lawler and puts the ankle lock on Lawler who taps.  Cole puts the hold on Ross and the evildoers stand tall.  Good stuff here indeed.

Edge and Christian get a tag title shot on Friday.  Cool.

Randy Orton vs. Mason Ryan

 

Huge hometown boy pop for Orton of course.  Orton has punted everyone so far and this is the final one left for Orton to beat.  Punk is on the ramp of course and if Ryan wins he can be in the corner of Punk at Mania.  Ryan uses basic power to take over and hits the sitout Rock Bottom for two.  The referee seemed like he had to stop early there so maybe Orton missed his cue.  Ryan picks him up and another attempt is countered into the RKO to end it at 2:58.  This was nothing for the most part but at least the dismantling of the Nexus is over now.

Orton goes up for Punk on the ramp but turns around and sprints back into the ring to punt Ryan as well.  Punk tries to get in from behind but Orton turns and they lock eyes with both almost on their stomachs.  Punk slithers out.  Ryan is taken out on a stretcher.

We recap Snooki and Vickie from earlier and that slap.

Drew Carey is going into the Hall of Fame.  What do you even say to that?

Cole talks some more about how awesome he is.

Snooki and Trish are up next.  Snooki gets hit on by Zach Ryder and it’s totally pointless.

Snooki comes out and says nothing at all of note.  Way to earn that paycheck!

Vickie Guerero vs. Trish Stratus

 

This is No DQ all of a sudden.  Before the match Vickie yells at Snooki and claims that she was supposed to be on the cover of Rolling Stone instead of Snooki.  Trish works as a brunette too.  Vickie warms up before we get going here so Trish rolls her up for two.  Vickie runs to the floor and loses her shoe.  She gets it back and uses it like a sword.  Then she throws the shoe at Trish and tries to use it like a baseball bat.

Vickie gets spanked by the shoe until Dolph comes in for the save.  Cue Morrison for the second save and a big corkscrew plancha to take down Ziggler.  Laycool comes in and Michelle gets the boot to the face of Trish.  Vickie gets the pin at 2:30.  Just a comedy match here, and yet still longer and better than Hardy vs. Sting.  You knew I’d have to get a shot in at that somewhere.

Laycool gets in Snooki’s face post match and the fight is on.  Trish makes the save.  Snooki raises her arms and the tips of her fingers are equal to the top of Trish’s head.  Vickie makes a challenge for a 6 person/Diva/creature tag at Mania.  Snooki will do it.  Oh sweet goodness I need a blunt object to bash my skull in with.

Sin Cara is still coming.  That looks awesome.

Shawn talks about Undertaker.  I should point out that it’s 10:58 and we have a main event to go still.  Shawn praises Taker as he did HHH last week and nothing of note is said.  There’s an aura to the Streak apparently.

Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena

 

Del Rio grabs a headlock to start and Cena speeds things up.  Cole says Rock is here tonight in St. Louis.  Del Rio hits the floor and we take a break at 11:05.  Ok then.  Back with Del Rio getting two off an unseen move.  Double knockdown and they slug it out after getting up.  Here come the shoulders and Del Rio is in trouble.  Five Knuckle Shuffle but Brodus runs in for the DQ at 7:25.  Not enough shown to rate again which is rather annoying but that’s life.

Anyway the point here is that Rock’s music plays and HE’S…..someone in a bald wig.  That would be Miz I believe.  Cena beats up Brodus but the numbers catch up to him.  That’s the best bald wig I’ve ever seen.  Cena is sent to the floor and Miz beats on him even more.  A few mic shots to the head put Cena down.  Del Rio and Clay are gone.

Miz suplexes him onto the ramp to mess with his back.  Cena fires back but can’t get the FU.  Miz DDTs him on the stage and Cena is out.  Cena gets rammed into the big WWE sign on the stage as this is going a bit long.  Skull Crushing Finale into the same sign and Cena is out cold to end the show.  Miz’s face is awesome.

Overall Rating: A-. This was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen….for about an hour and ten minutes.  Starting with Orton, the rest of this show just fell apart.  Now that being said, it was still very good overall.  Cena/Miz/Rock is awesome at this point and the Cole vs. Lawler thing is going to be epic when it finally goes off.  This was a very good show and they got things going for Mania even more.  That being said, I loathe “celebrities” like the Jersey Shore people so that was a big black mark for me.  Other than that, good stuff and even more good building for Mania.

Results

Great Khali b. The Miz via DQ when Alex Riley interfered

Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick

Randy Orton b. Mason Ryan – RKO

Vickie Guerrero b. Trish Stratus – Guerrero pinned Stratus after a big boot from Michelle McCool

John Cena b. Alberto Del Rio via DQ when Brodus Clay interfered

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 28, 2011
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

We have five Raws to go before Wrestlemania and the card is starting to have a lot more shape to it.  With the highest rating the show has had in over a year and a half from last week and a record high rating for Smackdown on Syfy this past week, things are looking good on paper at the moment.  Tonight we’ll likely see more of Cena vs. Rock to build up to some showdown in Atlanta or possibly even next year in Miami.  Let’s get to it.

HHH opens the show and it’s confirmed that he has Taker at Wrestlemania as he’s on his way to the ring.  Josh sounds a bit off tonight, like his voice isn’t working properly.  The graphic shown for their match lists Undertaker as The Last Outlaw.  Sounds like a weak cowboy heel gimmick in the 80s.  HHH chant starts up before he talks.  Josh hasn’t talked in awhile while Lawler has so maybe he’s sick or something.

HHH says the real test is the test of time and there is nothing he hasn’t done in WWE.  He’s defined the Elimination Chamber, he’s defined Hell in a Cell, he’s a 13 time world champion, he started DX and Evolution.  He’s been hated and loved, he’s defeated icons legends and immortals and has been here 16 years.  HHH says he’s outlasted everyone except for one person.

He says Undertaker is now known as the Last Outlaw, but that’s not true.  The two of them are more alike than Undertaker realizes.  There are no more challenges for either of them but Taker has the Streak which is all that keeps him going.  HHH claims to be the only true challenge Undertaker has left.  I guess we’re ignoring HHH being victim #9 in the Streak.  HHH’s only remaining challenge is ending the Streak, which will happen at Wrestlemania 27.  When the Streak dies, Undertaker dies with it and if he can’t end the Streak then he’ll die trying.  Good and emotional promo here from the Game.

As he’s about to leave, here’s Sheamus.  Sheamus steps into the ring and gets a stiff low blow.  No Pedigree but rather Sheamus is thrown to the floor where his beating continues.  He throws Sheamus into the time keeper’s area and launches the chair out of there too.  Pedigree onto the announce table kills Sheamus dead.  That table collapsed very well too as it looked like it exploded.  And before everyone says it, no that wasn’t a burial.

Shawn Michaels is going to give his opinion on the HHH vs. Undertaker match later.

Cole is going to answer King’s challenge tonight.

Rock (via satellite) will answer Cena as well.

Back and Sheamus is just now being helped out of the arena.  There’s an E-Mail which Lawler answers.  He starts saying the May I Have Your Attention Please but stops and says nah.  The E-Mail says that Sheamus was supposed to have a match and will still have that match, against this man who is returning to Raw.

Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne

 

Bourne fires away with kicks and hits (read as he missed by three inches) with a spin kick.  That sets up the Shooting Star Press to end this in 37 seconds.

Rating: B-. The first 12 seconds were pretty good, the next 8 dragged it down but the final seventeen more than made up for it.  Solid TV match.

With Bourne still in the ring, Justin Roberts introduces Michael Cole. He says he’ll tell us what his plans are for Wrestlemania in just a few moments and we take a break.

Undertaker will be on Smackdown.  There will also be a contract signing for Edge vs. Del Rio.

After a quick video of Cole insulting Jerry and his mother last week, Cole calls Lawler into the ring.  Apparently only Lawler can get fired for striking Cole and not the other way around.  Cole stumbles over his words here.  Cole claims to have the most guts in the company and that he never backs down from a fight.  His answer to the challenge is no.  Cole’s face is so smug here that it’s great.

Cole says he’ll accept under two conditions.  First off his trainer has to be in his corner at Wrestlemania and he gets to pick a special guest referee for the match.  Lawler says he doesn’t care if Cole has the Dark Knight, King Kong, Saba Simba and Superman with him, it’s on.  Cole is WAY too happy about this, even dancing a little over it.

He introduces his trainer: Jack Swagger.  Odd choice but it gives Swagger something to do I guess.  Lawler stares up at Swagger and Cole slaps him.  Jerry goes after Cole but gets caught in an ankle lock while Cole laughs at him.  The referee isn’t announced here.

Austin will be here next week.

Cole wipes off Lawler’s headset to take over on commentary.

Cue Orton to a ROAR.  Great pop for him there.  This is a match but Orton has something to say to Punk first he.  Last week CM was right about something.  Two and a half years ago when Orton punted him it was the biggest mistake of Orton’s career.  He should have kicked harder.  Faith can’t protect Punk from punting him again.  Orton talks about putting Punk in a rehabilitation home and the only thing Punk will have left is the faith that failed him.

Cue New Nexus led by Punk who has the microphone.  Could we get to a match anytime soon?  Punk says he’ll take care of Orton and here they come.  An E-Mail stops them, which says that Orton will face Punk at Mania.  Until then Orton gets singles matches against members of the New Nexus.  If they beat Orton, that member can be in Punk’s corner at the PPV but if they lose, that member is barred.  If any member interferes, the team is disbanded.

Randy Orton vs. Michael McGillicutty

 

Orton takes over quickly as you would expect.  The knee drop misses and here comes McGillicutty.  A clothesline by Orton sends him to the floor and we take a break.  Back with McGillicutty hitting a dropkick for two.  He adds the Mr. Perfect neck snap from the middle rope in a cool looking move.  There’s the chinlock from McGillicutty on the master of the chinlock.  Orton fights back and gets the powerslam and backbreaker.  Elevated DDT has McGillicutty reeling.  RKO ends it at 7:15 with about 4 minutes shown.

Rating: D. Not impressed here as it was just a step ahead of a squash.  Did anyone think McGillicutty had a chance here at all?  Either way, it would be nice to have a 1-1 match at Mania rather than having to worry about the interference.  This also gives Orton something to do between now and Mania so that helps a bit.

Post match Orton sets for the punt and Punk comes out to talk him out of it.  This fails of course and McGillicutty’s head is somewhere in the 4th row.  McGiilicutty’s face on the replay is great as his eyes are bugged out and his mouth is wide open.

We get a clip of Sin Cara aka Mistico signing with WWE.  The name Mistico is mentioned as well which is surprising.

Here are Miz and Riley.  Miz says Rock is responding to Cena tonight and not to Miz.  Why isn’t he doing that?  Because Rock knows his time has passed and Miz is now the top star in WWE.  Everyone wants him and wants to talk to him.  He talks about Cena, saying that Miz won the titles last week, not the two of them.  Cena should be worried about Miz, not Rock.  Miz says he’ll beat Cena and then everyone will talk about him as the greatest superstar of all time.

Cue Cena who says he has very important news.  He can’t listen to anything else Miz says because Miz isn’t well.  Cena pulls out a Doctor’s Note (construction paper with Doctor’s Note written on it and a Red Cross) and says Miz is obsessive compulsive.  He’s obsessed with being awesome despite being average.  Cena lists off various things that Miz does, none of which are funny.

Riley says that toilet bowls are called Johns, because just like Cena, they’re full of crap.  Even Cole makes fun of Riley for that one.  Cena asks Miz if he gets it now why no one takes him seriously as champion.  Cena makes something resembling a gay joke by asking if Miz wants to know if he wants his legacy to be shared with another man.  He says Miz should fire Riley tonight to make Mania one on one.

Miz tries to come back at Cena by making fun of the jean shorts so Cena makes more gay jokes.  He says be a man tonight and wants a match with Riley.  If Cena wins, Riley doesn’t work for Miz anymore.  Miz accepts for Riley, on one condition.  Miz won’t interfere, but if Riley wins, Cena has to say Miz is the greatest superstar of all time, because he’s the Miz and he’s awesome.  Cena lists off all the things he’s been put through in the past year and twists his arm around saying ok you’re on.

We get an E-Mail (and the third person answering it in the form of Cole) which says the match tonight will be in a cage.  Good thing they had one above the ring.  You can only win by escape.  Really a weak segment that doesn’t make me want to see them fight any more than I did before.

Divas Battle Royal

 

Back with this randomly starting.  Eve is on commentary and the winner is #1 contender.  About four people are gone in maybe a minute.  You can go through the ropes to be eliminated.  Within maybe a minute we have a Bella, Maryse and Gail.  Gail sends Maryse out with a handful of tights and then the Bellas switch.  One is thrown out and the other switches.  Eve says she’s had enough and whichever Bella that is (Cole doesn’t know either for the most part) but apparently it’s Brie who wins in 2:00.  Basically all the Raw Divas were in this.

We go to Rock at his home in a Cena hat and with a chain around his neck.  He makes fun of the rapping thing from last week and then “takes this crap off.”  He goes on a big rant against Cena, saying he’s electrifying Buffalo like only Rock can.  He looks like he’s in front of a green screen (I know he’s not but it looks like it for some reason).

Rock talks about making his big return and then Cena replies to him with a rap.  Well of course he did because that’s how the guy in the purple shirt and jean shorts would do.  He makes fun of Thuganomics and Hustle, Loyalty and Respect.  This all started when Cena called Rock a liar when Rock said he loved WWE but never came back.

His love for WWE is endless.  He was born here and it’s in his blood.  There are title belts behind him which he proudly displays and that all he wanted to do was prove that he can do things outside of WWE to open the door for the locker room.  But then Cena insulted the Rock.  Cena opened a door of his own and on the other side is The Rock.

At Mania he’ll be hosting but he’ll be addressing Cena sooner than Cena thinks.  His spirit is everywhere and he can electrify Buffalo just like this.  He snaps his fingers and the lights go out in the arena.  Rock says he’s never alone but is with the millions and millions of Rock’s fans.  He implies he’ll be face to face with Cena very soon.  He says the Rock is back to scratch an itch, so enjoy your Fruity Pebbles you Yabba-Dabba Man.  Very intense and full of energy, but it’s a step down from the two previous promos by these two.

Shawn gives his thoughts on HHH vs. Undertaker.  There is no higher mountain than the Streak but there is something about HHH that is intense beyond words.  More or less Shawn doesn’t pick either guy.

Here’s Daniel Bryan for a match but Miz jumps him on the way to the ring.  A running big boot puts Bryan down as this is an assault.  Fan: “Miz you’re a big cheater!”  Bryan is destroyed and takes a Skull Crushing Finale onto the floor.  Even Cole gets on Miz for this.  Miz grabs a mic and says he did that because he can.  Welcome to the Miz Show!  Now lower the cage and start the match!

Alex Riley vs. John Cena

 

You can win by escape only and if Cena wins, Miz has to fire Riley.  Miz tweets that he’s on commentary which is kind of cool.  Cena hammers away in the corner and doesn’t seem to be that worried.  Release fisherman’s suplex puts Riley down.  Miz is being a jerk even to Cole as he’s not happy about being forgotten for Rock and Cena.  That’s a very legitimate criticism actually.  Miz runs away to stop Cena from getting out of the cage and allows Riley to get in a good shot and take over.

Riley’s chest is blood red.  Cena goes into the cage and Miz has Riley bring Cena over to the cage to take a picture of him for Twitter.  That’s hilarious.  Miz slips the phone in through the cage and Cena is clocked with it.  The referee is like dang I need to upgrade.  Cena makes a diving save and Miz runs up to start a tug of war with Riley.  STFU goes on and Riley is in trouble.  Cena tries to get out but Miz grabs a chair and holds him off for Riley to get an electric chair drop and we take a break at 11:02.  Ok then.

Back with Riley hitting a dropkick but Cena is coming back with his ending sequence.  Five Knuckle Shuffle hits as the crowd doesn’t seem to care.  They’ve been pretty weak all night but granted with this card that’s not really something you can blame them for.  FU is blocked and they fight on the top rope.    Riley knocks him down and goes up but takes forever as I guess Cena wasn’t ready in time.

Cena makes the save and they fight on top of the cage.  Riley goes back in and Cena does also for some reason.  Back in the ring there’s the FU and Cena grabs Miz’s phone to take a picture of Riley.  Miz stops him from escaping again but Cena just shoves the  door open with the power of Flintstone Vitamins to win at 12:50.  He winds up taking a Skull Crushing Finale on the floor to end the show.

Rating: C+. Decent  match for the most part and I don’t think the ending was ever really in doubt, but the phone spots were funny as they were trying something new out there for the sake of comedy.  Good stuff here but I’d really like this to become a more serious main event feud than the comedy stuff they’ve been doing so far.  Also, Riley vs. Cena in a cage?  Really?  That’s the main event of Raw?

Overall Rating: D. Well some stuff was added to Mania, but this was a very boring show.  FAR too little wrestling.  Even another five minutes or so would have helped this but there was just nothing of note in the ring here.  I get that they just had a big South American tour and are all spent but this was ridiculous.  Cena not taking Miz seriously is getting old fast and I’m hoping the title doesn’t change at Mania.  Weak show overall, but there were some decent parts.

Results

Evan Bourne b. Sheamus – Shooting Star Press

Randy Orton b. Michael McGillicutty – RKO

Brie Bella won a Divas Battle Royal – Bella last eliminated Gail Kim to win

John Cena b. Alex Riley – Cena escaped the cage

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 21, 2011
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We’re 41 days away from Wrestlemania and the first stop on the real Road to Wrestlemania is here in Fresno.  The main event on the Raw side is Cena vs. Miz which does sound like a big match if done right.  WWE has a lot of momentum right now with a good show last night, Rock’s return last week and the arrival of whoever 2-21-11 is about tonight should mean this will be a big night for WWE.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot of a clock counting down to 2-21-11 which is set to end in roughly an hour.

Theme song.

Cena opens the show and says what a day and what a crowd.  There’s a Rocky chant as he gets ready to talk.  The fans seemed to be split when he came out but cheering more for him than booing.  He won the Elimination Chamber last night and is going to Wrestlemania.  Last night should have been a fun night filled with wine, women and song, but this isn’t your typical night.

Since last week he hasn’t been hearing about the Miz or the Elimination Chamber but rather about alleged comments Rock made about him.  People have been asking what Cena is going to say about the Rock, but Cena isn’t sure what to do.  He was planning on just letting it go because it’s the Rock.  We look at the footage and Rock’s face on screen gets a big old pop.

We see the clip from last week of Rock ripping Cena apart for the catchphrase and the hand gestures and the colorful shirt.  Rock said he’ll see Cena at Wrestlemania.  Cena says that Rock was making fun of him and Cena should probably say something right?  There’s only one way for Cena to call someone out but he hasn’t done it in a long time.  However, he still has a degree in Thuganomics.  If he doesn’t take care of this tonight he can’t focus on Wrestlemania.  This is a one time only thing.

After a brief warmup he’s in a Fresno State (location of the show) of mind and he gets out the chain.  I won’t try to put what he says here but his great line is “I was speaking the truth.  You left us all hanging to play a fairy about a tooth?”  Cena is like a big purple pinwheel Rock so go ahead and blow him.

There’s a Witch Mountain/Brokeback Mountain joke in there as Cena is ripping into all of the movie titles of Rock.  The fans are into this it seems and definitely aren’t booing.  To close it out he said we couldn’t see Rock for seven years but Cena is here every week to show what the fans mean to him.  Find this online as Cena completely owned Rock here.

Cole is going to interview King later.

Morrison vs. Punk next.

46 minutes left in the clock.

John Morrison vs. CM Punk

 

Morrison can barely walk and do his pose due to the knee injury last night.  Punk is limping as well.  This is one of the best rivalries in years in WWE.  Think back to how many times they’ve fought over the years.  Morrison hammers away in the corner and Punk is in trouble to start.  He slips to the floor though and rams Morrison’s knee into the apron to take over.  Punk is moving much better than Morrison here.

Punk busts out the Haas of Pain of all things.  It’s like a Sharpshooter but Punk is laying next to Morrison and puts his foot on the crossed legs of Morrison and bends Morrison back.  Morrison gets out and fires away again.  And never mind as Punk gets a kick to the knee and the GTS ends this clean at 2:57.  That came out of absolutely nowhere.

Rating: C+. Considering the injuries and the psychology here this was good enough to warrant a rating.  Punk looked good and it doesn’t really hurt Morrison that much since you had Morrison all banged up out there.  Decent match and something I’d love to see more of with these two both healthy.

Post match Punk talks to Randall Keith Orton about how Punk is right here and waiting on Orton.  The New Nexus has the night off and this isn’t a trap.  Everything is about choices.  Today these people bought a ticket to see Punk.  In September of 2008, Orton made a choice to punt Punk in the head and cost him the title.

He points at the Mania sign and says that Punk isn’t going there because Punk is going to hurt him.  Orton needs to walk away and not be here next week or Punk will hurt him.  Cue Orton through the crowd and Punk runs.  New Nexus comes out but Punk shoves them away and a stand off takes us to a break.

 

Here’s Ricardo to introduce Del Rio for his match.  As Del Rio is doing his entrance, Kofi jumps Alberto.  There was a bell before Del Rio came out and a referee is out there so I’m assuming this is a match.  They never get into the ring though and Del Rio puts the Cross Armbreaker on the heavily bandaged arm and leaves Kofi laying.  I guess this wasn’t a match.  Kofi gets up and Del Rio jumps him again and Kofi is in trouble.

Miz is up next as we have 23:30 to go in the clock.

Here’s the WWE Champion to talk about the Rock.  He talks about remembering Rock ripping people apart time after time and was thrilled to hear what Rock had to say about him.  The best Rock could do is say that Miz sucks?  Really?  Really?  REALLY?  He’s heard better from kindergarteners.  Let him wipe his tears in his championship gold.  Miz doesn’t care what the fans think of him and he’s the most must see WWE Champion there is.  This was a lot better than it sounds.

We get an E-Mail which says enough about the Rock as the GM will deal with Rock when the GM is ready.  We get a Rock N Sock Connection reference and tonight the tag titles are on the line with Corre vs. Miz/Cena.  Please…..not this angle AGAIN.

Back with I kid you not George Washington vs. Abraham Lincoln.  Cena does a run-in to beat up George Washington.  It’s for the WWE All-Stars game if that makes you feel any better.

Bella Twins vs. Eve Torres/Gail Kim

 

Fast paced brawl to start with Gail dominating.  Nice cross body by her gets two.  The other Bella pulls Gail off the apron and it looked like her head slammed into the floor.  This is a very aggressive match.  Eve comes in and does the standing moonsault for two as the other Bella distracts her.  Rollup by Eve doesn’t work as Twin Magic occurs and one Bella pins Eve at 2:30.  This was nothing.

Less than three minutes and we take a break.

Back with the countdown starting at 25 seconds.  We see shots of the house and the crowd counts it down as the door on the house is opened.  Yep it’s Taker to almost no one’s shock.  Still cool though with Johnny Cash playing him to the ring.  There’s the gong and the place lights up.  Big explosions and Taker’s symbol hangs over the ring.  He takes the hat off, AND IT’S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!!!!  HHH is back too!

He does the corner pose and Taker stares him down.  HHH looks over his shoulder and the music ends.  BIG HHH chant starts up.  They get nose to nose and HHH looks at the Mania sign.  Then Taker looks at the Mania sign.  Taker….smirks at HHH and puts the hat back on.  Deadman turns his back on the Game as the sign hangs over both of them.  Taker turns to face the Game and gives him a throat slash.  Not a word has been said this whole time.  HHH holds up his arms and does the crotch chop.  They stare down again and we go to a break.  Cool segment.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

 

They brawl to start and Henry grabs a bearhug and throws him to the floor with ease.  Very slow and lumbering match here as we’re back in the ring.  Slingshot shoulder block gets two for the king.  Henry rams Sheamus into the corner to take over.  A splash misses and Sheamus kicks him in the chest.  Sheamus pulls the turnbuckle off and Henry rams him into the exposed buckle.  World’s Strongest Slam ends this at 3:50.

Rating: D-. It was slow, it was stupid, it was lumbering and this gets us….where?  Nothing special here at all and granted it didn’t help to have to go on after the double return like that.  Yeah I’ve got nothing else to say here.

Miss USA is going to be on Tough Enough.  I give up.

Daniel Bryan and Gail are in the back but Sheamus comes up to get in his face.

The latest inductee into the WWE Hall of Fame is Hacksaw Jim Duggan!  This works fine for me.

Cole is here to talk to Jerry Lawler.  They can’t fight or they’re both fired.  Oh and Cole reminds us again that he’s a journalist.  The interview is next.

Here’s Lawler and Cole’s first question is what was it like knowing that last night was his big night.  Jerry says nothing.  How did it feel when he realized his dreams were going to be shattered and he was going to lose to the awesome Miz?  Did that mean maybe Cole was right and that it was time to retire?  Jerry says nothing.

What was it like when you were laying on your back and you realized that your deceased mother, no disrespect, had the best seat in the house and that your Wrestlemania dreams were over, how did you feel when you realized you let your mother down?  Jerry grabs Cole by the coat and says if Cole ever mentions his mother again it’ll be the last thing Cole ever says.  He’s had enough of listening to Cole.

Jerry says he’s going to Wrestlemania and he’s issuing an open challenge: Lawler vs. Cole.  Cole calls Lawler senile and runs back to the announce desk.  Lawler says be a man and show us what you’ve got.  Jerry asks if Cole is a coward and Cole takes his jacket off and throws his drink in Jerry’s face.  Cole runs into the crowd and Jerry is ticked.

Tag title match next.

Tag Titles: The Miz/John Cena vs. Heath Slater/Justin Gabriel

 

According to Josh this is unprecedented for some reason.  Miz vs. Slater to start us off.  All Miz so far as he beats on both Corre members.  Cena responds with a golf clap and is tagged in to a good pop.  Back off to Miz as the champions have had nothing for the most part.  There’s the Skull Crushing Finale and it’s over in 3:12.  What the heck?  Uh…ok then.  No rating due to the length as it’s 10 minutes til 11:00 so there’s a lot more to come here.

Barrett says hold it as the Corre is invoking their rematch clause right now.  An E-Mail says ring the bell.  The match starts post break.

Tag Titles: The Miz/John Cena vs. Heath Slater/Justin Gabriel

 

Back with the match already in progress and Miz holding a wristlock on Gabriel.  Cena comes in as does Slater.  Cross body by Cena gets two and it’s back off to Miz.  The WWE Champion is knocked to the floor and Corre holds Riley back so Miz can be beaten down by Gabriel.  Slater gets two on Miz.  Off to a chinlock by Slater which gets him nowhere.  It’s weird seeing Miz as the defacto face.  Neckbreaker by Slater gets two.

Gabriel in now but Miz fights him off and hits that knee to the back/neckbreaker combo.  He can’t make the tag though as Slater is tagged in for the save.  Miz still can’t make a tag and Gabriel throws on a headlock.  The crowd is WAY into this too which is making things a lot better.

Gabriel is sent to the apron and tries to come in off the top.  He jumps into a big boot though and Cena wants a tag.  Ask and ye shall receive as it’s Cena vs. Slater now.  Cena initiates his ending sequence and there’s the 5 Knuckle Shuffle and FU.  Actually it isn’t as Miz shoves Cena over with something like the Skull Crushing Finale and Slater gets the pin  to regain the titles at 12:00!

Rating: C+. Better formula match here and it worked pretty well.  I had a feeling they were going to do the switch right back and I’m glad they did.  This worked rather well and it sets up more of the world title feud between the two.  Good stuff here and the whole segment worked rather well.  Also very good that they didn’t go with the predictable ending.

Overall Rating: A-. First and foremost, those people complaining about the lack of wrestling here need to shut their mouths.  They’re completely missing the point of this and don’t even bother trying to compare it to Impact last week.  This was about building to Mania and it did that in spades.  The point was completely different and if you didn’t like what was done tonight that’s fine.  However, it wasn’t the same as what they did there and this is an instance where the lack of wrestling can be excused to a degree.

As for the show itself, this was a drama/storyline building show and it worked very well in that regard.  Cena responded to the Rock, we set up Cole vs. Lawler, Miz vs. Cena got development, two major stars returned to set up their big match at Mania and we might have a midcard feud developing with Sheamus vs. Bryan.  That all happened in two house plus more stuff.  I disagree with what they had go on last, but this was a huge show and it came off like a huge show.  Well done indeed.

Results

CM Punk b. John Morrison – GTS

Bella Twins b. Eve Torres/Gail Kim – Small Package to Eve

Mark Henry b. Sheamus – World’s Strongest Slam

The Miz/John Cena b. Heath Slater/Justin Gabriel – Skull Crushing Finale to Gabriel

Justin Gabriel/Heath Slater b. John Cena/The Miz – Slater pinned Cena after a Skull Crushing Finale

Elimination Chamber 2011
Date: February 20, 2011
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

It’s the final major stop on the Road to Wrestlemania as tonight we more or less set the main events in stone.  The title matches are the Smackdown Chamber match which has an open spot and Jerry Lawler vs. The Miz for the Raw Title.  It blows my mind that there’s an actual chance that is somewhat open for debate about who wins.  Also there’s the Raw Chamber match and that’s about it.  Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what you would expect: it’s a video of how the Chamber is the big diabolical (their word not mine) turn on the Road to Wrestlemania.  This is another of those shows where the big match sells itself and there’s not a thing wrong with that.

The set has what looks like the side of a Chamber in front of the Tron.  Yeah that’s not a bad idea at all.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston

 

Not a bad choice tos tart with but I’m so used to the Chamber starting us off that it’s a bit surprising.  Ricardo gets in a jab at the Raiders which is rather easy to do to be fair.  Alberto says that he’s committed to excellence unlike the people from Oakland.  Commitment to Excellence is the motto of the Oakland Raiders if that line makes no sense.  Tonight six men fight for the chance to face him and there’s nothing they can do to stop him.  Kofi’s music finally cuts him off.

This is non-title mind you.  Josh talks about Alberto taking liberties on Horny while Horny was blindfolded.  You can make your own jokes there.  We get an Alberto chant to start and a basic back and forth sequence to start.  Alberto is sent to the floor where Ricardo plays nurse as well as he can.  Kofi tries something on the apron and is rammed into the post to soften up the arm.

Body scissors by Del Rio who has a big chant going for him here.  Belly to back gets two for Alberto and it’s back to the body scissors.  Kofi fights back and gets a spinning flying forearm off the top in an awesome looking move.  They fight from their knees up to their feet and Kofi chops away.  Boom Drop hits but Trouble in Paradise misses.  Pendulum kick hits but the cross body is countered into a knee that might have been into the arm or ribs but it wasn’t clear.

Del Rio tries a superplex but Kofi fights him off and gets a missile dropkick for a close two.  It’s always cool when it looks like the referee threw his shoulder out on the two counts.  Del Rio gets something close to a GTS but instead it ends with a double knee to the ribs.  That only gets two and Kofi counters what looked like a big atomic drop into a DDT.  Ricardo distracts though so it’s only two.

The Armbreaker can’t go on as Kofi grabs the rope before it is applied.  SOS gets a very close two.  Booker is totally behind Kofi but says he’s trying not to be biased.  Kofi jumps at Del Rio in the corner but misses and Alberto gets a nice neckbreaker for no cover.  Cross Armbreaker is attempted but Kofi locks his hands to avoid it for a bit.  And never mind as it goes on and Kofi taps.  Alberto’s face is hilarious.

Rating: B. This is the kind of win that Alberto needs.  Kofi can afford some losses like this as Del Rio’s star is rising rapidly.  Also he didn’t get destroyed at all as he got ripped off by Ricardo a bit.  This worked rather well but is something you could see on a lot of Smackdowns for free.  Still good though.

Orton is ready.

Edge says he’s had a bad week and now that he has to walk into an Elimination Chamber after a week with Vickie, it seems like a walk in the park.  Drew McIntyre comes up and asks about the casualties like Kelly.  Edge says that Kelly and the title have something in common: neither will ever be seen with Drew.

Video about the Chamber which makes me think we’re getting ready for a lumberjill match.  What?  You don’t see the obvious connection there?

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Wade Barrett vs. ???

 

Remember that we have an extra spot open in the Chamber due to Dolph having been fired.  Kane comes out first and therefore is in a pod to start.  Drew is out second and therefore will be in a pod as well.  The first four will be in pods which means we get to see who the final guy is rather soon.  Barrett is in third.  We hear about his bare knuckle fighting experience which makes me ask again: has he ever used said skills to win a match?  Also Cole thinks Barrett is from Eastern Europe instead of Western.

Here’s Teddy Long when we’re ready for the fourth person.  He’s here to introduce the next participant I guess.  Here’s the replacement: It’s Big Show which is kind of what I expected when he came out there.  Rey vs. Edge to start.  Five minute periods as always with the last man standing winning.  Every five minutes another comes in.  Edge and Rey start off kind of slow which makes perfect sense as they want to maintain energy.

Edge sends Rey out to the steel for the first time with a backdrop.  Drew is all ticked off and hammers on the glass as he wants to get to Edge as fast as possible.  Edge and Rey fights on the outside with Rey being rammed into the cage multiple times.  Rey gets rammed into the glass which is “the strongest in the world” which gets two.  We’re more or less just killing time here and there’s the ten second clock.

In third it’s Barrett.  He’s all fired up and goes after Rey immediately.  Edge gets up to slow down the Englishman.  Edge and Rey work together until Edge slides Rey across the mat and cage so that his head rams into the wall.  FREAKING OW MAN!  Boss Man Slam to Edge gets two and Barrett turns his attention to Rey after taunting Show.  Pumphandle slam gets two.

Barrett is dominating here and we’re out on the steel again.  A shot to the cage with Edge’s head going into it gets two.  Edge low bridges Barrett and Wade might have hurt his knee.  Rey takes down Edge but as he goes up Barrett stops him.  Wasteland on the cage is countered as Rey grabs the cage.  He tries to climb but Barrett catches him in a powerbomb position.  Rana takes Barrett into the ring but Edge gets a big boot to stop the 619 for two.  Again, why would you stop a finisher?

In fourth is Kane.  He goes straight for Edge but gets caught by a boot.  Kane cleans house, beating everyone in sight down.  Everyone wakes up and gangs up on Kane as they should.  A bunch of kicks to the head can’t stop him so we get a triple clothesline with Barrett clotheslining Edge and Rey and vice versa.  We get some basic stuff and Barrett gets beaten down by Kane outside.

Rey tries to go up to take down Kane but a HUGE uppercut knocks Rey down into a Tree of Woe.  Edge adds a baseball slide for two.  Kane, Edge and Rey in the ring now while Barrett is slowly crawling back in.  In at #5 is McIntyre.  No eliminations yet.  Drew has been wanting in the whole time and immediately picks up Rey and launches him into the glass.  The Europeans beat up Kane, who actually is European as well so scratch that theory.  Drew kicks the rope as Barret gets in and then throws him through the UNBREAKABLE glass.  That’s a running joke now and it’s never been funny.

Drew is all annoyed and goes after Edge.  All Drew here as he can’t get Futureshock on Edge but Edge hits Edgecution for no cover.  Rey is somehow still alive as Edge is trying to get up.  Edge wants the spear but Kane grabs him in a chokeslam.  Rey is back in too but can’t hit the 619.  Kane beats everyone down and slams Rey into the post.  Drew can’t get Futureshock again as Kane backdrops him onto Barrett outside.

Edge and Kane hit double big boots to take each other down.  That replay of Rey being thrown in awesome as it’s amazing he’s still alive.  Show is getting ready as we’re under ten seconds.  Naturally he takes down everyone.  Barrett is the only one not in other than kind of Rey.  HUGE chop to Drew.  Barrett is the only one left standing other than Show and the stalking begins.

Show gets his hand on Barrett and chops away like 8 times on the outside.  Barrett rolls back into the ring and it’s all Show.  Big punch coming and Barrett is more or less dead and the pin is academic.  We’re down to five and Rey is on top of a pod.  Kane hits the top rope clothesline.  Edge adds a top rope elbow for two as Show launches Edge over the referee.  Futureshock to Show as Rey is still up there.  The DDT gets two as Rey is ready to jump.  Huge seated senton gets two as Rey is LAUNCHED.

619 and a spear put Show down but Kane fights them off.  Chokeslam to Show and we’re down to four (Kane, Drew, Edge and Rey if you’re curious).  Drew jumps into a chokeslam immediately and we’re down to three.  It’s more or less a handicap match here but Edge is taken down.  Rey hits a bunch of stuff on Kane but he can’t get the pin.  Spinning cross body is caught in a chokeslam position but he reverses into the 619.  Rey goes up and jumps into a powerbomb.  Spear from Edge and a double cover is enough to take Kane out and we’re down to Rey vs. Edge.

Kane kills Edge with a big boot and a chokeslam to Edge has both guys down.  After them laying there for a good while, Edge gets up and tries the spear but Rey reverses into a rollup for two.  Springboard cross body is rolled through into two for Edge.  Sitout bulldog gets two.  Rey goes up but gets stopped by a shot from the Canadian.  Mysterio knocks Edge down and tries a rana but Edge reverses into a sitout powerbomb for a long two.

Another powerbomb is countered into the 619 but Edge catches it and locks on the Edgecator of all things (kneeling Sharpshooter that he uses once in a blue moon).  Rey is in trouble but reverses into a rollup for two.  Good stuff here.  Edge sets for the spear and the fans are booing a bit.  Spear misses but the second one doesn’t and it’s NOT OVER.  Rey kicks out again in a big surprise.  619 hits and the springboard splash gets two.  Another 619 hits and Rey goes up.  Edge pops up and spears him out of the air to go to Wrestlemania FINALLY.

Rating: A. GREAT match here with Edge vs. Rey being the highlight.  I would say the ending was predictable but still, the ending sequence with all the kickouts was so good that it’s more than ok.  I don’t like Rey but he was great here.  I loved all the aggression in there with everyone destroying each other all night long.  Great stuff here and one of the better Chamber matches I can remember in along time.

Post match Alberto hits the ring and the beating is on Edge.  The Armbreaker goes on but CHRISTIAN runs out for the save to the least interested response from Cole that I have ever heard.  Unprettier to Del Rio (yes I know it’s the Killswitch but Unprettier is a better name).  Edge gets a spear to Del Rio to put him down.

The Rock will be at Mania.  Not sure if you heard that.

Lawler is getting ready when Striker comes in to ask for Jerry’s thoughts.  He’s thinking about his mother which is good emotion from Lawler.

Booker gets to make an in ring appearance and introduces the third trainer of Tough Enough: TRISH STRATUS??????  Even with the brown hair she’s still great looking.  She says she’s been getting excited about being around the ring and has been working on a new catchphrase.  FINALLY, the Trish has come back at Oakland to deliver Stratusfaction to the millions SUCKA!  Uh…yeah just wear little clothing Trish.  Booker wants to know that she didn’t just say that.  She’s here tonight to see King win the title.

Chaperone trailer despite the movie bombing for the most part.

Tag Titles: Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov vs. Justin Gabriel/Heath Slater

 

Jackson is here too which makes me think there’s a title change here.  Kozlov and Slater to start but it’s off to Santino almost immediately.  Off to Gabriel now as they trade strikes and leg sweeps.  Vlad gets a  battering ram to send Gabriel to the floor but a kick to the head puts the Russian down.  Very international match here with Canada/Italy, South Africa, South America, Russia and America being represented.  Slater in with a slingshot corkscrew splash for two.

Booker keeps calling Jackson a thug despite him not doing anything yet.  Back to Santino again who gets all fired up.  Hip block sets up the headbutt for two.  Gabriel comes in and it’s Cobra time.  It takes down Gabriel but Slater is legal so Marella has to cover him for two.  Slater gets up and stomps away at the Canaditalian.  Gabriel misses a slingshot hilo and it’s off to Kozlov who has no heat on the tag.

Blind tag brings Slater in and Jackson pulls Gabriel out of the ring.  Slater gets a reverses DDT for no cover as he brings Gabriel back in.  Santino is taken down by Slater and the 450 FINALLY gives Corre their first gold in the form of the tag titles.  Quick and simple and more or less a Raw match but the mild buildup works perfectly here.

Rating: C. This was a Raw match on PPV but it was perfectly fine.  Corre winning is the right move here and this lets them spread over to Raw, setting up the potential clash at Mania.  This was perfectly fine and a good way to bridge the gap between the first half and second half of the show.

Miz says he’ll win because this is his time, not Lawler’s or Rock’s.  He says he’ll address Rock later.

Here’s Vickie to waste more time.  She’s a bit quieter here.  She says that Dolph and her were dealing with some issues as he has a bad temper.  The booing is kind of funny.  It was a crime of passion apparently when Dolph jumped Teddy.  She begs for the fans to plead with Teddy to rehire Dolph as she deserves some compassion and a little bit of love.

Teddy comes out and Vickie sucks up to him.  Dang I didn’t want that image in my head.  He says shut up as he’s in a hiring mood.  It’s not Dolph but he’s rehired Kelly instead.  Kelly shoves Vickie down and the beatdown is on.  Laycool comes out for the save and beats down Kelly.  Trish comes out and runs them off but they go after Trish.  The good girls fight back and beat down Laycool and pose to end this.  Trish botched a lot of stuff in there too and it was rather bad.  We couldn’t have added five more minutes to Kofi vs. Alberto?

We recap Miz vs. Lawler.  There’s a great bit at the beginning showing Miz doing his apron pose and the different titles and things he’s had to hold in a quick montage.  Miz talks about how he was told to quit and kept rising up the ranks resulting in this title reign.  Lawler said that Miz needed to shut up and that’s all we see of their rivalry.  Instead we see Lawler winning the Raw rumble.  We get a cool montage of Lawler and how he’s won over 140 titles but never the WWE Title.  Cool video indeed.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Jerry Lawler

 

Wow I never thought I’d type that.  We even get big match intros.  Jerry in white and black with a cape here.  That’s rather awesome.  The bell rings twice so technically this isn’t happening.  Jerry gets a quick backslide and small package for two each.  He unleashes his variety of punches as it’s all Lawler so far.  Miz gets knocked to the floor and chills for a bit.  Riley distracts Jerry though and Miz sends him into the post to shift momentum.

Miz can’t get Lawler in the ring for some reason.  He settles for a running knee while Lawler is on the apron for two.  Jerry gets a punch and the fans wake up.  Running clothesline in the corner and down goes Lawler.  Miz goes up and Jerry crotches him so they slug it out on the middle rope.  Superplex puts Miz down for two.  Riley’s reactions out there are hilarious.

They slug it out again and Jerry gets a pair of dropkicks for no cover.  Backdrop and a falling punch get two as Miz is in trouble.  We get something close to Cole being civil by saying Lawler is hanging in there.  Riley interferes by tripping Lawler and is ejected.  I know it’s a long shot and more or less an impossibility but the stars are seeming to align for Jerry to pull this off.  Miz misses a charge in the corner and Lawler rolls him up for two.

Miz escapes the Piledriver and gets a big boot for two.  Jerry reverses the pin into a rollup for two and then Miz is sent to the floor over the top.  Cole is so annoying here as Jerry rams Miz into the announce table.  Cole says he and Miz have a personal relationship which you can make your own jokes about.  Jerry throws Miz at the commentators and Miz lands on Cole.  Booker cracking up at that is great.

Lawler is in control here and goes up top as we’re back in the ring.  Top rope punch to a standing Miz gets a very close two.  Crowd is INTO this.  Miz gets a thumb to the eye but can’t get the Finale as Lawler shoves him off.  Jerry gets a DDT and Miz is reeling!  He looks at the Mania sign and goes up for the middle rope punch.  With a point to the sign and the strap coming down, Jerry gets the fist but Miz gets his foot on the ropes.  My heart jumped into my throat there.

As Booker talks about Dr. Dre and Snoop Dog for no apparent reason the Piledriver is reversed into a rollup by Miz for two.  Jerry reverses that into one of his own for two but Miz gets a kick to the head.  And there’s the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin.  It was a nice dream while it lasted but at the end of the day I think we all knew this was coming.  Still though, INCREDIBLE job here by WWE of making us think it could happen.

Rating: B-. The match was weak from a technical standpoint but they NAILED the drama here.  Jerry is a master at working the crowd and he had me believing that it was possible.  He made us believe that he could actually do this and put on a passable match at the same time.  I really hope this results in Jerry vs. Cole or Riley at Mania, but still this was a great performance and the whole thing worked.

Cole celebrates like crazy and poses with Miz in the ring.  Jerry gets up and is like well I tried.  He gets a standing ovation and they play his music to take him out.  Cole of course WILL NOT SHUT UP and let Lawler have his moment.  If this doesn’t end with Jerry piledriving Cole half to death then it fails.  Still though, great moment and incredible storytelling by WWE there.

2-21-11 promo.  Yes, let’s continue to look for tiny clues in there when we’ll find out tomorrow.

Cena is eating Fruity Pebbles and Todd comes in.  Cena says that he’s thinking about the Chamber tonight and not what happened on Monday.  He feels Yabba Dabba Delicious though.

Striker is with Punk who says he’ll win.

Mania is in 42 days.  That sounds incredible.

We recap the first match Chamber match which is going to be hard to top.

John Cena vs. Randy Orton vs. CM Punk vs. R-Truth vs. John Morrison vs. Sheamus

 

Truth, Punk, Orton and Cena in the pods to start.  Punk gets in Orton’s face while Orton is in the pod.  Booker says he can go right now and he means against Cole.  Morrison vs. Sheamus to start us off.  How in the world is Morrison a dark horse like this?  Oh and remember that the winner gets Miz at Mania.  Here we go.  The fans seem to like Punk but I’m not sure if that’s what they’re saying.

They start off with some nice back and forth stuff until Sheamus slaps him.  Angry Morrison shows up and the beating is on.  Sheamus hides outside so Morrison dives over the top rope to take him out.  Both block head shots to the cage and Morrison sets for the Flash Kick.  Sheamus avoids it but Morrison is like boy I’m John Morrison so he catches himself on the cage and hits a Flash Kick from there instead.  That gets two back in the ring.

Sheamus takes over and we have dueling Cena/Punk chants.  With not a lot going on it’s Orton in third.  He cleans some house and it’s a powerslam (Booker calls it a scoop slam) to Sheamus and then one to Morrison (scoop powerslam according to Booker which I can live with).  Morrison goes through the glass.  Actually he might not have as the door might have been open.

Orton manages to get the elevated DDT to Sheamus onto the cage in a painful looking spot.  Punk enjoys that for some reason.  All Orton here as Morrison and Sheamus are getting destroyed.  Morrison takes a superplex for a close two as no one is gone yet.  There’s one for Sheamus as well for the same result.  Miz and Riley are watching.  Oh and Scott Armstrong has a job again.

In fourth is Punk and Orton is waiting on him.  And they can’t get the pod opened.  Punk is stuck in the door!  THIS IS HILARIOUS!!!  Orton is like screw it and hammers away as Punk still isn’t out!  Ah there he is.  RKO and Punk is gone in like 12 seconds!  Orton celebrates….and we get an E-Mail???  Since Punk couldn’t get out, he’s back in the match.  Dang it all.  He’s allowed back into his pod also.  Oh sweet goodness.

Irish Curse to Orton but the High Cross misses.  Flash Kick to Orton and it’s Sheamus vs. Morrison now.  Morrison is thrown to the steel and might have hurt his ankle.  There’s the clock again and it’s Cena in now.  And never mind as Sheamus kicks his head off as soon as Cena’s pod opens.  Cena is up soon after it but can’t get the FU to Morrison who flips out to land on his feet on the steel.

Morrison takes out Orton and Sheamus.  Cena dumps Morrison to the steel again and they fight out there for a bit.  Sheamus is like forget it and launches himself with a double slingshot clothesline to take both guys down.  Orton vs. Sheamus in the ring now and a Thesz Press takes Sheamus down.  Truth is in next and Sheamus tries the same thing he did to Cena which doesn’t work here.

Truth hammers away on Sheamus in the pod which works for a few seconds.  All five still in now.  Truth cleans a little house with the Lie Detector to Cena.  And then he walks into a Brogue Kick to put him out.  Orton vs. Cena and Sheamus vs. Morrison at the moment.  Sheamus’ back is all red and purple.  Orton throws Morrison through the glass and then the superpowers explode.

They slug it out but Orton gets a sweet dropkick for two.  There’s the clock and it’s time for Punk.  Orton waits on him and the door opens for a change.  Cena grabs Orton though but it winds up being an RKO to Cena on the steel.  Punk isn’t in the ring yet.  Brogue Kick to Orton and apparently covers count on the steel as Punk gets two out there.  Punk does the RKO setup in a nice bit of cockiness and manages to get the GTS to put Orton out.

Down to four now (Punk, Cena, Sheamus and Morrison).  Punk goes after everyone but the bulldog on the steel to Sheamus doesn’t work at all.  Morrison vs. Sheamus now and Morrison tries to climb a pod.  Sheamus follows and they fight ON TOP OF THE POD.  Sheamus sets for the High Cross but Morrison fights out of it and knocks Sheamus to the mat.

Morrison CLIMBS THE DOME OF THE CHAMBER and hangs there before dropping down onto Sheamus for the pin!  Would have been better if Sheamus hadn’t looked at him for 10 seconds but dang that looked incredible.  Punk charges at Cena which fails completely.  Five Knuckle Shuffle hits and Punk rolls to the steel.  FU doesn’t work out there but Morrison dives on both of them and they’re all down.

With Cena down, Morrison tries the running knee at Cena but it misses and the knee goes through the glass.  FREAKING OW MAN!  In the ring Punk covers off a freaking snap mare for two.  Triangle choke goes on which is now the Anaconda Vice apparently. Cena is like screw it and stands up to allow Morrison to team up for a Doomsday Device for two on Punk.  Wow they’re going old school here and Morrison is looking great.

FU to Morrison but Punk takes Cena down so there’s no cover.  Punk gets the springboard clothesline to Cena on the steel and Punk might be busted open on his arm.  Punk slingshots Cena into the glass which doesn’t break.  COVER HIM!  Naturally he doesn’t as he goes after Morrison.  A slingshot into the pod doesn’t work as Morrison catches himself on the pod then jumps to the cage and hits a Flash Kick.  Starship Pain misses though and the GTS ends Morrison.  Cena pops up and hits an FU over the ropes and onto the steel to go go Mania!

Rating: A-. Another great match here.  I hated the Punk thing at first but now it’s not so bad all things considered.  Cena winning is again predictable but at the same time it’s the best match they have available.  I’d love to see it and if you throw Rock in as a wildcard how can you go wrong?  This was a good match and the whole thing worked.  Good stuff again and worth seeing.

Overall Rating: A. This was an AWESOME show.  When the worst match is perfectly acceptable, how can you say it’s anything but great?  We have Mania set up, there was great drama in the Raw Title match, Corre gets a title now and we got two GREAT Chamber matches.  Mania is set and I’m getting fired up now.  Couple that with the Rock and 2-21-11 tomorrow and how can you complain?  Great show and well worth seeing.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. Kofi Kingston – Cross Armbreaker

Edge b. Wade Barrett, Big Show, Kane, Rey Mysterio and Drew McIntyre – Edge last eliminated Mysterio to win

Justin Gabriel/Heath Slater b. Vladimir Kozlov/Santino Marella – 450 to Kozlov

The Miz b. Jerry Lawler – Skull Crushing Finale

John Cena b. CM Punk, John Morrison, Randy Orton, R-Truth and Sheamus – Cena last eliminated Punk to win

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 24, 2011
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show before the Rumble so something tells me they’re going to be talking about one thing quite a bit.  Tonight is probably going to be the last push for people that actually think they have a chance at it while they’re nothing but cannon fodder for the people that really have a chance.  Also tonight we get to find out a little something about the guy that might as well be Batista’s son.  Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.  I can’t remember the last time that happened.

Edge vs. Miz in a champion vs. champion match.

Melina challenges for the Divas Title tonight.

Here’s Edge to open the show.  He says to Miz that he doesn’t have a lot of patience and doesn’t want to wait.  After listing off things he doesn’t like to wait for he says let’s do it now Miz.  An E-Mail cuts him off though and the GM doesn’t like Edge still.  Thankfully they’ve gotten what looks like an e-mail on the screen now.  We’re going to have a mini Rumble right now and whichever of the three can throw Edge over gets #40.

Edge vs. Tyson Kidd/Drew McIntyre/Jack Swagger

 

They all come and are in at once.  Edge takes them all down and eliminates Kidd.  Drew kicks him HARD in the head and almost gets him out.  Swagger makes the save as he wants the final spot but charges at the champion and goes flying out also.  Edge throws Drew out without much effort to win at 1:14.  No rating of course and I’m not even going to call it a real match of course.

Post match Edge says he’s going to get ready for Miz but first of all he wants to relive something that he did the last time he was on Raw.  Does anyone want to see a smashed computer?  Edge goes out to the computer but Cole stands in his way.  Edge is going after him but here’s Nexus instead.  Five guys this time, including the new guy.

Punk says that in this world only the strong survive and they do that by evolving.  He talks about the Rumble being bigger and to survive, the New Nexus had to evolve as well.  Punk introduces the new man, and his name is indeed Mason Ryan as we all knew coming in.  At least it’s official now.  Ryan says faith.  That’s the only thing he says.  Everyone is in Nexus because of faith according to Punk.

He talks about Corre (yes I know it’s the wrong spelling and I don’t care) and how Nexus has more faith than they do.  He will win on Sunday and Nexus will become the most powerful group the WWE Universe will ever see.  Could that mean a new addition?  As he stops talking, cue the Corre (I hate myself at times).

Barrett says he’s looking at the poor man’s version of Nexus.  Jackson says Corre will try to win the Rumble for themselves but will eliminate Punk.  Ryan gets in his face and we have an e-mail.  The GM makes Barrett vs. Punk.  The loser’s entire group is out of the Rumble.  The guest referee is Cena.  King says it’s a match you never thought you would see on Raw.  Why wouldn’t you expect to see that on Raw?  Anyway that takes us to our first break.

Back and we get a clip of the mini Rumble from last week with Henry clearing the ring.

John Morrison/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Alberto Del Rio

 

Alberto and Morrison start us off.  Cole is ripping into Jerry over him lasting 4 seconds in the 97 Rumble.  Alberto controls early and brings Sheamus in after a few seconds.  Morrison fights back fairly well against the Human Jar of Mayonnaise.  Off to Alberto again and Morrison may want to consider a tag.  He’s fought off Del Rio but won’t tag.

Morrison sets up for Starship Pain but Sheamus pulls him to the floor as we take a break.  Back with Del Rio holding Morrison in a chinlock.  Sheamus interfered during the break to give his team the advantage.  Off to Sheamus again and we see that Michael Tarver is watching on.  He looks a bit slimmer but that could be due to being in a suit.  Sheamus continues to hammer away and locks in that highly modified crossface chickenwing that he’s been using recently.

A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two.  Brogue Kick misses and Morrison gets an enziguri to take down Sheamus.  Henry finally is tagged in after 9 minutes.  He runs over Del Rio a few times and gets a standing splash for two.  He and Sheamus face off but get Sheamus gets taken down by the Flash Kick.  Morrison dives out onto Sheamus and may have tweaked his knee on the landing.  In the ring the cross armbreaker ends Henry at 10:07.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this match for some reason.  It’s not terrible but Henry not coming in until the very end hurt it a bit.  Morrison seemed like he was sleepwalking through this and it didn’t work that well for the most part.  It’s an ok match but it never really got going for me.

Divas Title: Melina vs. Natalya

 

Melina is shrieking early and knocks Natalya to the floor very early.  Natalya is in trouble and Melina locks on a Full Nelson using her legs while sitting on the mat.  That’s a new one on me for sure.  Natalya stands up and rams Melina in the corner and fires off some forearms.

She pulls back for a big right hand but Melina drills her to take her down.  Melina tries a leg lock but Natalya grabs the legs and pulls into a Sharpshooter, wrenching back on it so hard that she’s laying on her back.  There’s the easy submission at 2:45.  Too short to grade but that submission was great.

Post match here’s Laycool.  They say that this Sunday Natalya is losing some weight in the form of the title.  They don’t say which it is but apparently one or both is getting a shot.

Back and we recap last week’s main event with Punk winning by DQ due to Ryan kicking him in the face.  There’s a religious sounding song in the background as Punk narrates about loyalty and faith.

Nexus is worrying about how Punk could cost them their spots in the Rumble.  Punk and Ryan come up and Punk talks about making a sacrifice to beat Cena.  He says that Sunday they will all sacrifice their spots so that Punk can win.  Harris isn’t looking happy about that.  He says there are 40 people this year and what if Punk is already gone when they get there?  Ryan says Punk won’t be eliminated.

Punk says take care of the Corre tonight but McGillicutty says what about Cena?  Punk says he’ll win because Barrett was Cena’s main enemy, not Punk.  The leader has them take a knee and raise their fists, drawing great heat from the crowd.

Matthews is with Cena who says he’s always done the right thing and he’ll do that tonight.  If Punk wins he’ll eliminate every member of the New Nexus.  If Barrett wins he has to deal with the Corre, which has an extra R.  He found out what it stands for earlier today but gets cut off by Miz and Riley.  Apparently it stands for rectum.

Miz says everyone needs to realize that winning the Rumble could be the worst thing possible as it means they could face him.  Cena stares him down and says Miz might lose at the Rumble and lose his rematch and not make it to Wrestlemania.  Cena leaves and Miz gets rid of Matthews.  Miz asks the audience if they think he’ll win the Rumble.  He asks Riley if it’s ready and Riley says roll the footage.  We get a clip of the beatdown of Orton from last week and Cole is very happy with it.

The Miz vs. Edge

 

As we’re about ready to go here’s Dolph.  Can we get to some wrestling already?  Ziggler and Vickie join us on commentary and we finally get the bell.  Edge has taped ribs due to the Corre attack on Friday.  After a brief feeling out process Edge takes over with some basic stuff.  Later on we’ll get an update on Teddy Long.  Miz fires back but no one has had a long advantage yet.

Edge gets a clothesline to take Miz to the floor and we take a break.  Back with Edge getting a cover over what looked like a backdrop.  Jerry: “Vickie I’m glad you could be here.  I thought you’d be at the birth of your next boyfriend.”  King gets a good line in every now and then like there.  Miz takes over but lowers his head and gets caught in a spinning neckbreaker.  Edge wants the spear but Miz hits the floor.

Miz goes for the ribs but can’t send Edge into the railing as the Canadian reverses.  Back in and Miz can’t get a superplex.  Edge knocks him off and gets a top rope cross body for two.  Jerry gets in an argument with Vickie and Dolph over glasses and pants or something like that.  Miz drapes Edge over the top rope as we take another break.

Back with Miz getting a two off an unseen move.  Some right hands get another two.  Miz has a body scissors on Edge as Cole goes on and on about how great Miz is, listing off various people he’s a combination of: Sammartino, Thesz, Michaels, just to name a few.  Edge fights up and gets his half nelson face crusher for two.  Miz’s corner clothesline misses and Edge gets two.

Riley grabs the leg of Edge and Edge goes after him.  Nothing comes of that but Miz gets a small package on Edge when he comes back in for two.  Edge hits the ropes and misses a clothesline but Edge takes out Riley with a baseball slide.  Edgecution puts Miz down and Edge wants the spear.  And never mind as Ziggler trips him for the DQ at 16:40.

Rating: B-. Good match here and it got a lot of time.  The double commercial kind of hurt it as it made it feel a bit disjointed.  They started to crank it up at the end, but the most important thing here is that Miz looked pretty strong.  No one winning definitively is a good thing for sure.  Not a great match but not bat at all.

Post match Ziggler hits the Zig Zag but here comes Orton for the save.  The crowd wakes way up for his appearance.  RKO to Riley and RKO to Ziggler, but Miz gets a shot in and leaves with the title as we take a break.

Back with Barrett saying that he always talked about how Nexus was about the bigger picture.  However he lost sight of that and only cared about the title and humiliating Cena.  We pan out to see everyone else but Barrett repeated that there are no leaders here.  Matthews asks about the attack on Long but Barrett again denies it.  He respects Cena and hopes that can be mutual someday.

Daniel Bryan/Bella Twins vs. Ted DiBiase/Alicia Fox/Maryse

 

The genitaila have to match here.  The guys start and it’s off to a Bella and Maryse very soon.  The other Bella hits on Daniel and Maryse gets a rollup with ease to end it at 57 seconds.  No rating of course.  Alicia I beg of you: straighten your hair again.

Back and the Bellas are arguing about Bryan.  Tarver is staring at them and then disappears.  That was….odd.  They go into Bryan’s locker room and find him making out with Gail Kim who is apparently his girlfriend who he’s been dating for SIX MONTHS???  And yes he was in fact a vegan.  Gail says he was hanging with the Bellas because he felt sorry for them since there were no more guest stars and they had nothing to do.  They call Gail a nothing and a brawl breaks out.  This was surprisingly hilarious.

Here’s Nexus and the tag titles are on the line next.

Miz/Ziggler vs. Rated RKO on Friday.

Michael McGillicutty/Husky Harris vs. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov

 

Cole corrects himself as this is not a title match.  McGillicutty and Kozlov to start.  Off to Santino and he loses the advantage for his team.  Harris beats him up for a good while as the Canaditalian is in trouble.  He needs a tag but Harris takes Vlad down before it can be made.  Santino wakes up and fights Harris off on his own.  Time for the Cobra but he walks into a clothesline from Husky.  Downward Spiral ends it at 3:52.

Michael McGillicutty/Husky Harris b. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov @ 3:52 – Downward Spiral to Marella

Rating: D+. Nothing special at all here and I’m not entirely sure if I’d have gone with a glorified squash of the champions.  It was a TV match with nothing going on at all for the most part.  Pretty clear that it’s just a way to set up another Nexus title run which they could use I guess.  Yeah that’s it.

Otunga says let’s hear it for the winners and introduces Punk.  Cena is coming and we go to a break.

Wade Barrett vs. CM Punk

 

Cena is referee and the winner’s group gets to stay in the Rumble.  Before the match, Cena throws Nexus out.  Hey Corre, you’re out too.  Cole gets on Cena for abusing his power with those ejections.  Ah there’s the bell but Cena shoves Punk down almost immediately.  Punk comes up with a fist but Cena points out the referee.  There’s a slap to Barrett from Punk and again with the shirt.

Punk jumps Barrett and we’re finally on.  Barrett is thrown to the floor and Punk jaws at Cena, saying that’s him on Sunday.  Naturally Cena throws Punk over the top.  Punk charges back in but won’t hit him because it would mean he’s out of the Rumble.  Barrett jumps him from behind, but Cena hits the floor to sign some autographs instead of counting a pin.

Back in the ring and it’s…a bell?  It’s a double DQ for use of excessive profanity on a PG show at 2:00.  Both teams are out of the Rumble!  Cena starts to leave but it’s an E-Mail.  The teams are back in, but if Cena doesn’t apologize to both guys then he’s out.

Wade Barrett vs. CM Punk went to a Double DQ @ 2:00 when they both used too much profanity

Cena apologizes but drills them both.  The rest of the teams run in and Cena hits the floor.  The locker room empties and it’s the annual pre-Rumble big brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. And let the bashing me begin.  This wasn’t about wrestling tonight and I’ll be ignoring comments from people that say this is unfair to give this such a grade.  Yes it is, as the point of this show was a buildup to the Rumble.  This certainly did that and in spades.  It wasn’t a wrestling heavy show but it wasn’t supposed to be.  Decent enough stuff and the things that needed to happen happened.  Good go home show.

Results

Edge b. Drew McIntyre/Jack Swagger/Tyson Kidd – Edge last eliminated McIntyre to win

Alberto Del Rio/Sheamus b. John Morrison/Mark Henry – Cross Armbreaker to Henry

Natalya b. Melina – Sharpshooter

Maryse/Ted DiBiase/Alicia Fox b. Daniel Bryan/Bella Twins – Rollup to Nikki Bella

Michael McGillicutty/Husky Harris b. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov – Downward Spiral to Marella

Wade Barrett vs. CM Punk went to a Double DQ when they both used too much profanity