Monday Night Raw
Date: May 16, 2011
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

It’s the final Raw before the Over the Limit PPV and we have our main event in the form of Cena vs. Miz for the title.  Other than that there isn’t a ton here so we’ll likely fill out the rest of the card tonight for the red show.  Over the Limit feels like a filler PPV which is rarely a good thing.  Hopefully Raw gives me a reason to not think that after tonight.  Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

Here’s Cena but before he can say anything Riley pops up on the stage.  Riley says he knows what Cena is going to say and introduces a video of Miz beating on Cena.  Here’s Miz -who looks weird without the title.  Riley talks about how everyone has underestimated Miz.  They’re in the ring now and Cena isn’t pleased.  We get some classic cheap heat on the San Antonio Spurs for choking.

Cena cracks some jokes and implies Miz is a kid/stupid and then turns serious.  He talks about how Miz has proven everyone wrong, but on Sunday he won’t be saying he’s awesome.  He’ll be saying he quits.  An E-Mail says that Miz can pick Cena’s opponent and the stipulation for tonight but it can’t involve Miz or Riley.  Miz isn’t sure yet on either option.

Kofi Kingston vs. CM Punk

 

I’m not sure if this is a step up for Kofi or a step down for Punk.  Punk takes over to start and tells Nexus to stay at the top of the ramp.  Kofi sends him to the floor and they come down, only to have Punk send them back again.  Punk fires off some elbows to the chest for two.  Knee drop gets the same.  He tries to go up top but Kofi gets a kick to the side of the head and the champ takes over.

That HUGE cross body gets two and New Nexus is looking worried.  Boom Drop hits despite Kofi running around for about 8 seconds beforehand.  He keeps looking at Nexus and misses Trouble in Paradise.  GTS can’t hit but Kofi misses his jump in the corner.  There’s the GTS and Punk gets the totally clean pin at 3:56.

Rating: C+. This was fine and I can live with Kofi losing here as he was distracted by Nexus and he lost to a guy with a far better resume than he had.  I’d love to see these guys get more time out there as the stuff they had worked quite well while it lasted.  This was fine for a TV match.

Punk says that was just the beginning and Nexus will become the most dominant force in WWE history.

Miz is talking to Ziggler and Vickie about possibly facing Cena I assume.

Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly

 

Non-title again.  We talk about the Divas on Twitter because that’s about all there is to talk about.  Kelly does her gymnast stuff as we keep talking about Twitter.  The Twins cheat a bit and Brie works on a chinlock.  Kelly spanks her a bit and a quick rollup/pinning combination ends this at 1:56.

Post match the Bellas beat down the blonde and it’s Kharma time.  HUGE pop for the music coming on too.  Kelly is out in the corner and Kharma goes after her, only to have a Bella hit Kharma in the back.  Implant Buster to the other one.  We do get the terrified Kelly eyes and Kharma picks her up by the jaw.  She flicks Kelly in the head, laughs, and leaves.

Miz talks to Big Show and gets cut off.

That’s What I Am ad.

Here’s Rey to address the situation with R-Truth from last week.  He says that he wants to prove to Truth that he had no business being in last week’s main event or any for that matter.  He’s still waiting as we go to a break.  Back and instead it’s Alberto coming out to see Rey.  He talks about how he’s a pure blooded Mexican unlike Rey.  Rey says he’s proud to be a Chicano and an American.  If Truth isn’t here, then he has no problem shutting Alberto’s mouth instead.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio

 

They start off very fast with Rey getting a kick to the chest and moving out of the way of a charging Alberto.  Codebreaker to the arm out of the corner as we take another break.  Back with more arm work by Alberto and Rey can’t quite fight back.  Alberto puts on an armbar.  Make that a LONG armbar.

Rey starts his comeback and here’s R-Truth up in the rafters.  He wants the cops to be called as there’s a thief here as Rey stole his title shot.  Alberto doesn’t take the chance to jump Rey or anything so once Truth shuts up Rey keeps the advantage.  He speeds things up a bit more and it’s 619 time, but Ricardo grabs Rey for the CHEAP DQ at 9:34 total.

Rating: D+. Very boring match here as it was about 80% armbar and commercial.  The point was to set up the Truth stuff post match but can’t you have a good match at the same time that you’re setting up an angle?  Pretty weak stuff overall and not what you would expect from these two.

The heels beat Rey down a bit more post match, working on the arm.  Truth runs in after they leave and beats him down even more, saying that on Sunday Rey is going to get got.  The mask is almost off Rey at this point when Truth leaves.

Miz recruits Punk and Mason Ryan.

Time for the contract signing for Cole and Lawler.  Lawler agrees that if Cole wins Cole gets the HOF ring and if it ever happens, Lawler will induct Cole into the Hall of Fame.  Cole signs immediately as does Lawler.  Michael is all happy about it and it turns out that Sunday is a Kiss My Foot match.  We get a clip of Ross being forced to kiss Cole’s feet last month and also a clip from the Kiss My Foot match against Bret Hart where Lawler was made to kiss Bret’s feet and then his own also.

Cole puts his disgusting foot on the table and Lawler says shut up.  That was Bret Hart and Cole is no Bret Hart.  He’s not even a Jack Swagger.  Cole runs his mouth off, talking about how no one remembers Swagger being a former world champion and the only reason Swagger was on Wrestlemania was because of Cole.  Swagger isn’t happy with this and says he’s all yours King before leaving.  Cole tries to make nice with Jerry and gets slammed down by the tie again.  On Sunday, Jerry is going to put his foot in Cole’s mouth and close it.  Cole is crying as the segment ends.

Miz is talking to Kane when Big Show comes up.  Kane leaves while Miz is still talking and the tag champs face Nexus next.

Cole is all annoyed now.

Big Show/Kane vs. Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga

 

Kane vs. McGillicutty to start us off and that goes badly for Genesis dude (NXT 2 reference if you didn’t watch the show).  Does that make Kane Nintendo Boy?  Big Show comes in and the Nexus actually manages to take him down.  Cole keeps apologizing for the tiniest things that tick Jerry off now which is a nice touch.  The non-champs work on Show’s leg as Punk runs his mouth a lot.

Show actually uses some nice leg work to get out of the hold but Otunga stops the tag.  Show gets a belly to back suplex to put both guys down and there’s the tag to Kane.  Otunga’s boots look like the ones Swagger usually wears.  Kane beats up both guys but here’s Ryan in for the…..not DQ as he doesn’t get any contact in.  Show takes him down on the floor and it’s chokeslam time.  Punk gets a kick to the back of the head and the McGillicutter ends Kane at 4:50.

Rating: C. Not bad here and nice to see a little surprise as Nexus might actually be getting a push for a change.  Nexus is never going to be as strong as they were at first but this is nice to see as instead of just standing around they actually get a few wins.  Hopefully the tag titles change hands soon though as Kane and Show can only do their unstoppable giants deal so long before it gets incredibly dull.

Truth is Miz’s latest recruit.  As long as they don’t have another match I have zero issues there.

We run down the Over the Limit card to fill in some time.

Kane and Show say the loss means nothing.  There’s a title match on Sunday against Nexus apparently.

Cena is up next and he runs into Ryder again.

Miz comes out and picks a no holds barred match.  Cena comes out to fight and is jumped by Jack Swagger, who is the opponent.

John Cena vs. Jack Swagger

 

Swagger starts off in control as Cole says this is why Swagger abandoned him.  Cena tries to fight back but Swagger takes him down and adds a leg drop.  The dueling Cena chants begin and Swagger adds a suplex.  Vader Bomb hits as we take a break.  Back and we see that Cena tried to fight back during the break on the floor but was rammed into the post.  Also Swagger got a shot in with the computer.

Back in the ring and Swagger gets a chair shot to the back and Cena is in big trouble.  Vader Bomb onto the chair gets two only as the fans are getting back into this.  Jack wedges the chair between the top and middle rope but here comes Cena.  Never mind as he gets caught in something resembling a half belly to belly/half spinebuster for two.

Ankle lock goes on but Cena rolls through and avoids a charging Swagger, sending him head first into the chair.  Cena starts the finishing sequence and with a look at Miz, the Attitude Adjustment sets up the STF for the tap out at 11:30 total.  Better match than I was expecting.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent main event here as Cena and Swagger continue to have rather solid chemistry together.  Cena gets to win a match by submission to prove that he can even though we already knew he could.  Swagger looked good out there and got to be in control the majority of the time, which is what they should have done.  Good stuff.

Miz lists off various ways he could make Cena quit on Sunday, suck as dropping Cena off the stage, slamming a camera into Cena as he’s against the stage (which he actually does, getting a big crack as it hits the stage) or he could find something under the ring to use on Cena.  Alex finds a pipe which he hands to Miz who climbs the stairs.

Miz says he won’t use any of those things because there are a million ways to beat Cena which Cena hasn’t thought of yet.  He says he’s going to find a way to make Cena quit that Cena has never seen before.  Cena looks a tiny bit worried/scared here.  Miz won’t use the pipe Sunday, but he will tonight.  Riley provides the distraction and Miz gets a shot in but Cena fights back and takes down Miz, standing tall to end the show.  Cena says Miz is going to need the million he has and a million more, because at Over the Limit Miz is going to say I Quit.  Staredown ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Not a bad show here as they added some stuff to the PPV as well as built up a bit of drama for it.  It still feels like a filler PPV but it’s more interesting now or at least more fleshed out.  For a go home show this was certainly adequate but it only gets my interest up for the PPV a little bit.  Good enough though.

Results

CM Punk b. Kofi Kingston – GTS

Kelly Kelly b. Brie Bella – Cradle

Rey Mysterio b. Alberto Del Rio via disqualification when Ricardo Rodriguez interfered

David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty b. Kane/Big Show – McGillicutter to Kane

John Cena b. Jack Swagger – STF

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, Manhattan, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett, Randy Savage

Well since it’s the anniversary of this, why not do it? Raw more or less ended SNME which I’ll do that last original episode soon enough, as in about an hour from now. This is the show that completely revolutionized wrestling as it was the first show to be aired weekly on prime time cable. The production values were WAY up also as the lighting and the effects were stuff that was unheard of. We’re gearing up for the 93 Rumble which kind of sucked but whatever. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney who I didn’t think had a job at this point welcomes us to the show and keeps Heenan from coming in. This would become a running joke on the first few shows until Monsoon threw him out of the company. The arena looks small but cool. Rob Bartlett was a comedian from the Don Imus show and he is easily the worst announcer of all time but to be fair, I’ve read some comments from him since and he completely admits that he was awful, so at least he’s not delusional.

Koko B. Ware vs. Yokozuna

Koko comes out to what would become Owen’s music which makes sense as they were partners around this time. I wonder what’s going to happen here. They say their first swear word on the air which might be a first in company history. The tag line was uncooked, uncut and uncensored. I never got the uncooked part. How is that appealing? Bartlett just makes fat jokes about Yoko which makes sense. Vince is about as excited as humanly possible to be here. Bartlett makes jokes implying that Koko is Gary Coleman which is kind of funny but just out of place here. After Koko gets in no offense for about 4 minutes, the Banzai Drop ends this.

Rating: N/A. It was a glorified squash which is fine. I’m not sure how good this was for the first match in history but that’s fine I guess. This was just to push Yoko so that certainly accomplished its job. A lot of the earlier shows were almost all squashes so get used to it.

Ad for the Rumble.

We get a prerecorded interview from Heenan who talks about Perfect being scared of Narcissus, who was more commonly known as Luger. Heenan is WAY too excited about Luger.

Steiner Brothers vs. Executioners

The Executioners are masked jobbers as if it matters. That goofy clown as Vince calls him is at ringside and gets too much attention. Apparently his name is Doink. As for the match, are you really expecting anything other than total destruction? Apparently Mitch Ferhat, a former Buffalo Bill, is coming to the WWF. He never got there. The Steiner Bulldog ends it.

Rating: N/A. It was more or less the same thing as we got a match earlier, but with two guys instead of one. This is fine as it establishes two dominant forces for new fans which is a good idea.

A woman says that she’s Bartlett’s aunt. Naturally it’s Heenan in drag. This simply does not get old.

Razor Ramon comes out for a “special” interview. He’s fighting Bret for the title at the Rumble in case you didn’t know. It’s exactly what you would expect it to be as it’s just Ramon talking about Bret and how he’ll win the title and we see a clip of him beating up Owen on Superstars, which is why Owen isn’t here tonight.

Ad for Headlock on Hunger, which was a charity thing they were doing at the time to feed hungry people in Somalia.

Tatanka likes the Headlock on Hunger.

Intercontinental Title: Max Moon vs. Shawn Michaels

Max Moon may or may not have been Konnan. Shawn is just getting used to being a midcard deal so don’t expect much here. I don’t think it’s him here as it might be Paul Diamond, who was one of the Orient Express. We get more and more New York jokes from Bartlett that only a handful of people would get. He was great on a morning talk show but WAY off on a wrestling show.

They get the three un line here twice in one match as they try so hard to get that over as a tagline before they realized it sucked. Bartlett, in something that blows my mind, does an impression of Mike Tyson calling into the show from prison. This goes on over two minutes. Make that three. THEY’RE STILL DOING IT.

Seriously they did this for half of the match. Is this supposed to be funny or something? Am I supposed to be amused? After what felt like forever, Shawn hits the kick and that stupid suplex that he was using as his finisher at the time for the pin.

Rating: C+. It was an average match, but it had the DUMBEST commentary in recorded history. The match gets bonus points for being ok with those voices going though so there we are.

Ad for WWF Mania, a Saturday morning show.

Gene does the control center for the Rumble, which more or less is him talking about the major matches and we get promos from some of the guys in said matches, in this case Shawn and Marty. This is short but it was very effective at summarizing the entire show into a 3 minute video. Well done. We run down some people in the Rumble and get comments from Perfect. Ok now this needs to end as it’s about five minutes now. This was the first winner gets a title shot and it’s at 4pm. That’s just odd.

We have an Amish man trying to get inside. Guess who it is. He asks if anyone knows how to get onto the roof. I feel like I’m watching a Trix Cereal commercial. Also, WHERE DOES HE GET THESE COSTUMES???

Kamala exists and that’s about it.

Damien Demento vs. Undertaker

Who else would you get to main event the first show? Bartlett makes fun of Taker and I’m already tired of him. Demento is the guy that freaked out on youtube recently and freaked out about modern wrestling. He’s annoying as all goodness and this is his career highlight. We go over the matches for next week and that’s about all that happens in this match. The Tombstone ends this quickly.

Rating: N/A. It’s like 3 minutes long and it’s more or less a squash. That’s not that interesting.

Doink sprays Crush with water to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This started off ok but it felt like there was no flow to it at all. It just wasn’t that good of a show as far as establishing people like it was supposed to do. This show definitely assumed that most people were long time fans of the show and that’s not a good idea to do on a brand new main show.

Still though, this is one of those shows everyone should see at least once as it truly did completely revolutionize wrestling. Definitely take a look at it if you never have before or just to compare it to modern wrestling and see how much things have changed.