Monday Night Raw – July 24, 2006: They Were A Little Preoccupied

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 24, 2006
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to Summerslam and that means it’s time to start cranking up the build towards the show. You can guess where a lot of the card is going but they still need to hammer home some of the details. That can be quite the tricky situation but hopefully they can figure it out. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Shawn Michaels (and only Shawn, as Stephanie McMahon went into labor earlier in the day so the McMahons and HHH are a little busy) to get things going. A few weeks ago, he and HHH said that Stephanie McMahon had gone into labor and that was a lie. After a quick chat with God, Shawn says that life imitates art because Stephanie is currently in a hospital in Connecticut giving birth. As good family, Vince and Shane are at her side but HHH is at the hospital as well. Now between you and me, Shawn thinks HHH knows who the father is.

Cue Jonathan Coachman, on the phone with Vince, to interrupt. Vince has decided that Shawn won’t be running amuck tonight because the Coach is in charge. Shawn takes the phone and has Cleveland give Shawn two words. Shawn: “No sir they didn’t say that. They said hi!”

Shawn gives Vince some Lamaze lessons and then hands the phone to Coach because Vince is rather annoyed. Coach hangs up and Shawn asks if Vince asked about him. It turns out that Vince has made a match tonight with Shawn vs…..Coach himself. Shawn pauses and then bursts out laughing needing Coach to hold him up. A pause sets up more laughter and Shawn falls to the mat in hysterics. They had to throw this together at the last minute so this was as good of a plan as they could think of.

We look back at Randy Orton attacking Hulk Hogan at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Lilian Garcia is back so we look at Viscera attacking her two weeks ago.

Tag Team Titles: Spirit Squad vs. Highlanders

The Highlanders are challenging. Kenny sends Rory (not Robbie JR/Lawler) into the buckle and it goes rather badly. Everything breaks down in a hurry with the Highlanders getting in some right hands in the corner. Rory is sent outside and it’s Robbie in trouble until he neckbreakers his way to freedom. It’s off to Rory to clean house but a distraction lets the rest of the team break up the Scot Drop. Kenny Rolls the Dice to finish Rory and retain the titles.

Rating: D. Well that was necessary. They bring the Highlanders in, give them some nothing wins, and then have the Squad beat them in about three minutes. It might not be the end of the team, but were they that bad that you needed to have them lose so soon? Nothing match due to the time, but man that’s a fast defeat after bringing them in.

Mick Foley joins us from WWE Studios and can’t believe that Ric Flair called him “fat boy” last week. It hurt then and it hurt thirty years ago when Foley’s brother used it on him. Flair uses a fourth grade insult because he has nothing left and is nothing but a second rate circus sideshow. What has become of Flair? Now all he is doing is attacking innocent women, one of whom happens to be a friend of Foley’s. He’ll see Flair next Monday.

This week in wrestling history: Great American Bash 1989. Yep that works.

Here’s Ric Flair for a chat. Flair talks about the clip we just saw, which featured him beating up Foley’s mentor Terry Funk. Now all Flair wants is Foley in a match in any arena in this country. Cue Edge and Lita to say that Edge is the man now….and here’s Johnny Nitro to jump Flair from behind. The double teaming is on but John Cena runs in for the save.

Carlito hits on Trish Stratus and they’ll be hanging out after the match.

Coach is on the phone with Vince McMahon to try and get out of the match but Edge and Lita come in to rant about what just happened. Vince has a solution: Edge/Nitro vs. Cena/Flair tonight.

We get an official announcement that Stephanie has given birth to a girl named Aurora Rose.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

For the #1 contendership to the Intercontinental Title, which Carlito beat Shelton for last week. Carlito grabs some early rollups for near falls to start and a quick dropkick gets two. Benjamin is sent to the apron but pulls Carlito over the top by the arm to take over. Back in and a DDT on the arm sets up an armbar to stay on the shoulder.

Carlito fights up and hits a hurricanrana to head up top, only to dive into a Fujiwara armbar. The rope gives Carlito the break and he counters a powerbomb into a sunset flip for two. The Backstabber connects for two as Shelton gets his foot on the rope. With nothing else working, Carlito takes the turnbuckle pad off so the referee goes to yell. Shelton uses the distraction to get in a low blow for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. They had a little more time here though this would seem to be setting up a triple threat for the title at Summerslam. If that’s the case, I’ve heard of far worse ideas than putting these two with Nitro on a big stage for a title. It could work out well for all three and WWE could benefit from pushing younger stars for the Intercontinental Title.

We look at the Diva Dance Off from Smackdown.

Here’s Hulk Hogan (the greatest sports entertainment attraction of all time according to JR) and the ovation takes a rather good while, with the song starting over. Hulk talks about how crazy these Cleveland fans are but he knows that Randy Orton is crazy too. This wouldn’t even be the first time that he has dealt with the Orton family. Back in the 80s, Hogan dealt with Randy’s dad Bob.

When the blood was shed, there was respect on both sides. Now Hogan has to deal with Randy, who comes out to cut Hogan off. Randy is here to talk about Brooke Hogan and yes there was chemistry there. You could see it, even with Hulk’s fading eyesight. He and Brooke talked for at least five or ten minutes before Hulk showed up.

Brooke told him how handsome he was and how she loved the color of his eyes. The only bad thing is that Brooke is going to have to see her father’s legend killed. Hulk is ready to fight right now so Orton heads to ringside but takes his time. Hogan knocks him off the apron and into Jerry Lawler, who throws Orton inside for some right hands. Orton bails from the threat of the big boot. Nice little tease of the match here.

Mickie James vs. Candice Michelle

Non-title. Mickie kicks away for an early two and the chinlock goes on. Lawler makes his usual jokes as Mickie gets in the shoulders to the ribs. Candice is back with the figure four neck lock over the ropes, only to have Mickie roll through a high crossbody and grab trunks (or something close to them) for the fast pin.

Jerry Lawler threw out the first pitch at an Indians game.

Shawn Michaels vs. Jonathan Coachman

Shawn’s pyro is missing so he blames Coach. The bell rings so hang on a second as Shawn rolls outside to grab a skullcap. Coach nearly loses his pants and there’s the forearm into a nip up. The atomic drop sets up the top rope elbow….and here’s most of the Spirit Squad. Shawn dispatches them in a hurry so Sweet Chin Music drops the coach. Cue Umaga to jump Shawn for the DQ. This was an angle instead of a match but it worked fine.

Post match Umaga hits Shawn with the Samoan Spike to leave him laying as DX might have to sweat a bit for the first time in a few months.

John Cena thinks Maria is a little confused. Yes she’s beautiful, but sometimes he thinks she ate paint chips when she was a kid. Then sometimes he looks at her and thinks about things he only see in Penthouse Forum and….where was he going with this again? Anyway the show is being run by a phone tonight because Stephanie had a baby (Cena: “And HHH might have an inside track on knowing who the father is. He knows somebody or something.”). Then you have Edge, who is really rated PG-13 and Lita is rated NC-17 (Cena: “No Cold Sores In 17 Days!”).

Then there is Johnny Nitro, who is named after a natural gas and I’ll let you figure out the jokes yourself. Then you have the Legend Killer trying to put the moves on the legend’s daughter (Cena: “And I can’t blame him.”) but remember: Hogan Knows Best. Cena runs down the rest of the midcard and says that the big point is so clear even Maria can understand it: his partner is Ric Flair and they get to beat up Edge. Cena tells Maria to call him to wrap up a rather all over the place promo. Again though: the show was rewritten in a hurry so maybe he was told to just go fill time.

It’s time for the Diva Search elimination with Maryse being eliminated. I’m sure we’ll never see her again. This Friday: it’s musical chairs, with Miz nearly cracking up at the idea.

John Cena/Ric Flair vs. Edge/Johnny Nitro

Flair and Nitro lock up to start with Nitro getting smart by going to the eye. Everything breaks down in a hurry with the villains being cleared out as we take a break. Back with Cena getting beaten down with Edge getting in a little dance. Cena fights out and gets over to Flair for the tag as the pace picks up. The Figure Four goes on Nitro but Edge makes the save and hits the spear.

Nitro grabs a neckbreaker to send Flair outside but he’s back in with the chops. A clothesline takes Flair down though and he is knocked outside again to keep up the beating. Back in and Edge gets chopped out of the air, allowing the hot tag to Cena so house can be cleaned. Lita offers a distraction though so a chair to the back can give Nitro two. Cena is fine enough to grab the STFU to make Nitro tap.

Rating: C. Just a run of the mill main event tag here and that’s fine. I know the Intercontinental Champion had to tap out but it’s not like Nitro is anywhere near Cena’s level at this point. They’re still teasing Cena FINALLY getting his hands on Edge and I think you know where this whole thing is going. Not a great match or anything, but for a one off main event, it worked well.

Cena and Edge yell at each other a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. They didn’t have much to offer here but it worked out well enough all things considered. Again though, how much can you really complain about when the show is thrown out of wack due to Stephanie having a baby? There is still time to set up Summerslam and it’s not like you can’t see the card from here anyway. Not a very good show, but it didn’t need to be this week.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 21, 2020: That’s WWE For You

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 21, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

So we’re coming off Tables, Ladders And Chairs where the Fiend was burned alive to end the show. That’s kind of intense, but it’s cool because he sent out a tweet about twenty minutes later just in case there was any emotional impact built up. Last week’s numbers were an all time disaster and there is a chance we’re in for a shakeup (it’s been long enough since they’ve, ahem, fixed the problems around here) tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Tables, Ladders And Chairs if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Charlotte, now billed as a thirteen time champion because of the Women’s Tag Team Title, to get things going. We look at Charlotte returning last night to help Asuka against Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler, with Charlotte saying that she’s always willing to help a friend when asked. Charlotte introduces Asuka, who comes out to rant in Japanese, before switching to English to say she’s a double champion.

Charlotte brings up the Raw Women’s Title, friend to friend of course, but here are Baszler and Jax to interrupt. Nia says Charlotte took six months to heal up her broken arm but that voice is still just as robotic. Charlotte mocks her for losing last night but Nia says the two of them have a naughty or nice list. They just hand out beatings, like the one they gave to Lana.

Cue Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke, who are scheduled to face Jax and Baszler later tonight. Mandy thinks something looks different about Dana. She can’t figure it out, but she knows Baszler looks like Rudolph with a nose job and Jax is a reindeer without antlers. Then they get it: they aren’t the champions anymore. Charlotte says get a referee out here and the champs will sit around and watch.

There is going to be a Legends Night on January 4, featuring Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Kurt Angle and more. So there’s your effort to make the show better: the exact same people who they always trot out for something like this. Great indeed.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Charlotte and Asuka are on commentary as Baszler takes Rose down to start. Rose tries some grappling of her own and Baszler has not time for any of that, kicking her away without much trouble. A kick to the head gets two on Baszler though and it’s off to Brooke for a double suplex. Jax comes in and gets taken down with a very spinning headscissors. An ax handle to the knee and a knee from Rose put Jax on the floor.

The double dives take out Jax and Baszler but Rose and Brooke stop for a staredown with Charlotte and Asuka. Jax sends Rose into the barricade though and we take a break. Back with Rose slugging away on Jax but getting taken down by Baszler. Jax and Baszler stomp away on the leg but Jax misses the legdrop.

Baszler gets knocked off the apron though, leaving Rose to clothesline Baszler and hammer away in the corner. It’s off to Brooke for the cartwheel splash and a step up enziguri drops Baszler. The Swanton gets two with Jax making the save so Brooke takes Jax down on the floor. Baszler kicks Rose down though and hits a spinning backbreaker on Brooke. The stomp onto the arm misses but Baszler Kirifuda Clutches Brooke for the tap at 12:56.

Rating: C-. Brooke and Rose are there for obvious reasons and while they were trying here, I didn’t buy them as any kind of a threat to the monsters and it would have been fairly ridiculous to have them win. That being said, they do seem to be trying to get better and if they keep improving, good for them and good for us in the future.

Post match Jax gets sent out over the top post match for the big crash.

We look back at the Hurt Business winning the Tag Team Titles last night.

The Hurt Business finds a production worker wearing a New Day shirt, which they rip off and replace with a Hurt Business shirt. Dude got a new shirt so I don’t see this as a huge problem.

Here’s the Hurt Business for the VIP Lounge. MVP brags about their success and says the VIP Lounge is for people better than you. Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander brag about their win last night and Bobby Lashley says no one can beat him for the US Title. MVP thinks it’s a special occasion so he has a professional photographer for a photo. R-Truth photo bombs them though and the merry band of idiots chases him off.

Cue Riddle and Jeff Hardy to interrupt, with Riddle saying the Hurt Business should be chilling instead of being worried. Maybe listen to the Joe Rogan podcast or watch a Dave Chapelle special and escape the existential nature of life. After all, we’re all carbon based lifeforms living on a rock hurdling into space. MVP: “Nobody knows what you’re talking about. Nobody cares about your hair brained concepts. Why are you here?” Hardy says there is more to life than status and they would rather die with pride than live a life of greed. Ok then.

Angel Garza vs. Drew Gulak

Before the match, Garza gives the backstage interviewer a rose and offers her a post match interview under the mistletoe. She seems…..intrigued? Unsure? Thinking she forgot to pick up bread this week? Garza TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and throws them at Gulak to start, meaning it’s time to hammer away early on. A backbreaker gets Gulak out of trouble but Garza chops him in the corner. Garza hits a running knee to the ribs for one but the Wing Clipper finishes Gulak at 2:13.

We look at Drew McIntyre successfully defending the WWE Title last night against AJ Styles and Miz, who cashed in Money in the Bank.

AJ Styles blames Miz for costing him the title. Now he’s going to be on MizTV to hear an explanation and it better be good.

It’s time for MizTV, because on a show where we have so many people sitting on the sidelines, we can have two talk shows in the first hour with wrestlers in action later tonight. Miz apologizes for losing last night and brings out AJ for another apology. AJ yells at Miz for costing him the title by failing at a cash in but Miz snaps, saying he successfully cashed in ten years ago. Now he can’t do it again, because he has been here for fifteen years and no one respects him. Maybe becoming champion again would make people respect him but now he won’t have the chance.

Miz apologizes to AJ because they were both robbed last night. He even has a peace offering: AJ Styles can co-star in the next Marine film! We see a poster, which features Miz and Omos front and center, with a tony AJ on the head. Omos grabs the mic and says Miz screwed up last night but Morrison defends him. AJ talks about how Omos was about to have a peanut butter and Morrison sandwich last night but AJ called him off. Hang on though as Miz thinks that because Morrison technically cashed in the briefcase, he should get the contract back.

Miz demands it back RIGHT NOW but here’s Drew McIntyre to say he had a little celebration after he won the match last night. There was a little celebration and he, Keith Lee and Sheamus had an idea for a sequel to last week’s Night Before TLC. Sheamus and Lee pop up to read their part of the poem, which is all about tonight’s six man street fight. Drew thinks we should just do it now, but AJ dropkicks Lee into Sheamus, meaning Drew has to separate them.

We recap Retribution trying to recruit Ricochet over the last few weeks.

Drew has to keep Sheamus and Lee apart in the back. Sheamus leaves and Drew tells Lee that the three of them can do some damage together. Lee eventually agrees.

T-Bar vs. Ricochet

Retribution is at ringside as Ricochet kicks away at T-Bar to start. The springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air though and the standing backbreakers let T-Bar toss him around. T-Bar blasts him with a clothesline for two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Ricochet low bridges him to the floor but has to deal with Shatter and Mace. That’s enough for T-Bar to get in a boot from behind, but Mustafa Ali stops T-Bar to yell at Ricochet. T-Bar saves Ali from Ricochet and Feast Your Eyes gives T-Bar the pin at 2:43.

Post match T-Bar tells Ricochet to join Retribution or be ended.

New Day says they’ll be back after last night’s loss.

Hurt Business vs. Riddle/Jeff Hardy

Bobby Lashley/MVP for the Hurt Business here with the rest of the team at ringside. Hardy jumps the Business to start and hands it off to Riddle in a hurry. Riddle doesn’t do so well as Lashley takes him into the corner, meaning MVP can come in for the choking. A neckbreaker gets two on Riddle but he gets in a shot of his own, allowing the tag off to Hardy.

The legdrop between the legs into a basement dropkick gets two on Lashley, who powers out on the kickout. Broetry in Motion hits Lashley and the assisted Floating Bro keeps MVP in trouble. We take a break and come back with Hardy being knocked off the top and onto the steps on the way to the floor. Lashley starts going after the arm and MVP adds an armbar with an elbow into the shoulder.

The Ballin Elbow gets two but MVP misses a charge in the corner, allowing Hardy to hit the Whisper in the Wind. The hot tag brings in Riddle to clean house, with Alexander’s distraction not slowing him down in the slightest. A fisherman’s suplex connects but Lashley makes a very fast save. Riddle takes out Alexander and Benjamin but Lashley avoids the Swanton. The Twist of Fate is countered into the Hurt Lock and the tap at 11:50.

Rating: C+. This was pretty straight formula stuff and it’s a good thing to see Lashley getting another win. I’m really wanting to see Riddle vs. Lashley for the US Title, likely at the Rumble at this point, but I’m not sure where that leaves Hardy and the rest of the team for now. The Hardy Bros isn’t exactly a brilliant idea, but for a short form team, it should work out well enough.

Here’s Elias for a song. He talks about how rough of a year it has been but he has discovered someone who understands the Universal Truth in Jaxson Ryker. Now get his opponent out here.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Gran Metalik

Ryker throws him around to start as Elias sits on the turnbuckle for a song. Metalik avoids a charge into the post and hurricanranas Elias, but Ryker runs him over. The sitout chokebomb finishes Metalik at 57 seconds.

We recap last night’s main event, including the post match burning of the Fiend.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. He has been called sick, twisted, deranged and demented and last night, he showed he was all of those things when he burned the Fiend alive. Orton is not a normal man and he enjoyed every single second of what he did. He kneels down to look at the exact spot where it happened and says he can smell it if he closes his eyes. Orton: “Burning flesh has a tendency to linger.” Last night he couldn’t sleep because the voices in his head were gone.

All that he could hear instead was the Fiend gasping for breath and the flames got hotter. Orton says the Fiend is no more and he is the evil son of a b**** who took him out. Speaking of out, the lights go out and Alexa Bliss, on a swing set is in the ring. Bliss says he built this for her and now it’s Alexa’s Playground. Orton is probably wondering where He is. Maybe He is at a tanning salon or at the beach or maybe he’s at his favorite restaurant, eating his favorite food (Bliss: “Barbecue!”).

But Orton is right: it was right here where you can still see and smell what happened to the Fiend. It’s almost like Fiend was absorbed into the mat and now he’s home in the earth. But if he ever leaves home, he’ll come back to Alexa’s Playground and it’ll be like nothing Orton has ever seen. The lights go out again and…..we look at commentary. As usual, WWE is horrible at building up tension as this could have taken six weeks but instead it took one day. Just let us believe that Fiend could be gone instead of all but saying “yeah he’ll be back” the next night.

We look back at Charlotte returning to win the Tag Team Titles last night.

Lacey Evans and Peyton Royce are ready to take care of Charlotte and Asuka tonight.

Lacey Evans/Peyton Royce vs. Asuka/Charlotte

Non-title. Royce is caught in the Asuka Lock fifteen seconds in with Evans having to make a save. Asuka kicks Lacey in the ribs as we see Baszler and Jax watching from the back. Royce gets in a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Asuka in trouble but Lacey and Peyton get in an argument, allowing Asuka to suplex her way over for the tag to Charlotte. Chops abound and a big boot drops Royce. Charlotte gets pulled into a half crab though and Evans tries to play defense, only to have Asuka slip in for the save. Asuka kicks Lacey down and the Figure Eight finishes Royce at 8:03.

Rating: C. Just a quick win to keep Asuka and Charlotte hot after their title win last night. The team should be fine as a dream team for a little while, but I’m not sure who is supposed to take the titles other than Baszler and Jax. That can work for the time being though, as it’s not like the titles are regularly defended in the first place. On the other side, it’s nice to see that we are getting closer to the Iiconics reunion every single week.

We look at Titus O’Neil giving a long time Tampa worker a car after 27 years on the job. It was one of five cars that O’Neil and his foundation gave away.

We look back at Drew McIntyre having to break up the fight between Sheamus and Keith Lee.

Miz is on the phone trying to get his contract back but AJ walks up to hang up the phone. Miz isn’t happy.

Drew McIntyre/Sheamus/Keith Lee vs. Miz/John Morrison/AJ Styles

Holiday street fight, so Morrison and Sheamus start things off. Morrison elbows Sheamus in the head and takes him down by the leg in a bit of a surprise. Sheamus is taken into the corner for some triple teaming but Sheamus powers his way out without much trouble. It’s off to McIntyre, with Morrison taking him down by the leg. The Glasgow Kiss rocks Morrison though and Lee comes in for a double toss suplex to send Morrison flying.

A double shoulder drops Morrison as well and there’s a double hiptoss to AJ from Sheamus and Lee. Sheamus glares at Lee, who slaps him in the chest, causing Drew to have to separate them again and we take a break. Back with Miz and Morrison being shoved off the apron as things have calmed down a bit. Sheamus puts AJ in a chinlock but Styles gets up for the tag off to Morrison.

That’s fine with Sheamus, who knocks him down and goes up top, only to be shoved down through one of the tables at ringside. Back in and Miz takes over on Sheamus, even ripping at his face to make it worse. AJ comes in and cuts Sheamus off, only to get caught with White Noise. The hot tag brings in McIntyre to clean house with a bunch of suplexes. McIntyre nips up but tweaks his leg (which Morrison worked on earlier and AJ damaged last night) in the process.

It’s fine enough to hit a spinebuster for two as everything breaks down. Lee runs over Styles and Morrison takes the Irish Curse. AJ comes in with some candy cane kendo stick shots to McIntyre’s knee to take things outside. McIntyre throws him into a Christmas tree and then hits a powerbomb through a table of egg nog and cookies.

The Claymore is broken up but Sheamus tags himself in to load up the Brogue Kick. Lee tags himself in as well and shoves Morrison into Omos’ arms, allowing Omos to drop Morrison through a table (with the camera cutting to the ring and then back to the powerbomb). The Spirit Bomb finishes Miz at 18:25.

Rating: D+. What kind of a street fight was that? This was a regular six man (with tags) for fifteen minutes with a weapons shot and some tables being broken in the last three, making me wonder why they bothered with the theme at all here. It didn’t help that they’re redoing the arguing teams from the Survivor Series deal (with two of the same people) a month later, but you can’t expect WWE to be that creative. At least Sheamus vs. McIntyre should be fine for a Rumble title match.

Post match Sheamus hits Lee with the Brogue Kick, causing McIntyre to yell WHY to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This definitely wasn’t the reset show and really, it’s not the worst thing to do. The numbers aren’t going to be great in the first place, but it’s also four days until Christmas and they have over a month before the Royal Rumble. Why bother trying to do something big here when they aren’t going to have an audience in the first place? Granted it probably isn’t a good idea to take a week off after last week’s terrible number, but that’s WWE for you.

Results

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax b. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch to Brooke

Angel Garza b. Drew Gulak – Wing Clipper

T-Bar b. Ricochet – Feast Your Eyes

Hurt Business b. Jeff Hardy/Riddle – Hurt Lock to Hardy

Jaxson Ryker b. Gran Metalik – Sitout chokebomb

Charlotte/Asuka b. Peyton Royce/Lacey Evans – Figure Eight to Royce

Keith Lee/Sheamus/Drew McIntyre b. John Morrison/The Miz/AJ Styles – Spirit Bomb to Miz

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: From Fire To Bronuts In Seven Minutes Or Less

Maybe this has something to do with those low ratings.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-fire-bronuts-seven-minutes-less/




Monday Night Raw – July 17, 2006: Anyone Want To Make This Hard For Them?

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 17, 2006
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Saturday Night’s Main Event and as a result, absolutely nothing has changed. Therefore, it’s time to get ready for Summerslam and John Cena challenging Edge for the Raw World Title seems to be a likely choice. That is the kind of match that deserves the big stage and hopefully that’s exactly what it gets. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

D-Generation X joins us with a special message: a video recapping them being mean to Vince McMahon over the last few weeks. It’s not much funnier in a big video package either.

Here’s DX, featuring hometown boy Shawn Michaels, for a chat. Actually we make that a discussion of which shirt they are supposed to be wearing tonight. HHH thought they were wearing the old one, available at the merchandise stands and WWEShop.com. Michaels thinks it’s the new one, which is also available at the merchandise stands and WWEShop.com, though he has to read his locations off his wrist. HHH: “Easy there Miz.”

With the important stuff out of the way, Shawn has heard that Vince McMahon is kind of mad at them but they aren’t sure why. HHH takes a quick poll of the audience about whether or not they should stop. HHH: “Now come on Shane. Uh, Shawn. It’s live TV give me a break.” Besides, there’s no way the people here, in Shawn’s hometown of San Antonio, Texas, would want to see DX face the McMahons in a tag match tonight.

The fans disagree so HHH thinks we should make the match. Cue the McMahons, with Vince calling DX a bunch of degenerate juvenile delinquents. Vince says tonight, we’ll have Shawn vs. Shane, which seems to take the latter by surprise. Shane didn’t like Shawn’s impression, because he DOES NOT dance around like a midget on crack. Tonight, instead of the Alamo, these people will remember Shane beating Shawn 1-2-3. The DX plugs are always worth a chuckle.

Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin

The winner gets a future Intercontinental Title show (or Cruiserweight Title shot according to the introductions). Shelton headlocks him down to start and the armbar is on in a hurry. That’s reversed into an exchange of rollups for two each before Shelton kicks him in the face for two. The chinlock is on in a hurry and Shelton switches to right hands and choking like a villain should.

It’s off to a sleeper, which is broken up in a hurry so Carlito can hit a clothesline. A springboard back elbow gives Carlito two but the Backstabber is countered. Shelton grabs a cradle but can’t reach the rope. Instead, Carlito reverses into one of his own and successfully grabs the rope for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see in this one and the ending was hardly in doubt after Carlito beat Nitro in the mixed tag on Saturday. There was no need to do anything tricky here and going with Carlito as the next challenger makes as much sense as anyone else. You can always use some fresh stars so pushing someone as a new face is worth a shot.

We look back at John Cena beating Edge via DQ on Saturday, though he did put Edge through the announcers’ table to continue the feud.

Trish Stratus hits on Carlito, who declares that cool.

This Week In Wrestling History: The Brawl To End It All. Yeah that was pretty big.

Trish Stratus/Torrie Wilson vs. Mickie James/Victoria

Candice Michelle is guest referee for obvious reasons. Mickie drops Torrie in a hurry and Trish has to be held back to break up some interference. Victoria’s dancing moonsault takes too long to set up though and it’s off to Trish to take over. Victoria whips Mickie into the corner but misses Trish, only to have Mickie break up the Stratusphere. Candice doesn’t like the interference and throws Mickie outside, leaving Trish to hit Stratusfaction for the pin on Victoria. Short match with an obvious point.

Armando Alejandro Estrada isn’t worried about Umaga facing John Cena tonight. Umaga has no comment on the subject, though he does shout after Estrada hits his catchphrases.

Mick Foley joins us from WWE Studios and yes, this is the shirt he wore when he was interviewed by Katie Couric. For now though, Foley wants to talk about Ric Flair, who remembers beating Foley two straight falls at Vengeance. Foley remembers it as Flair being left bloody and broke, which was Foley’s plan all along. That’s why Flair is getting no rematch, as Foley has nothing left to prove.

Charlie Haas and Viscera are not explaining their actions against Lilian Garcia last week.

We recap the Diva Search Boot Camp from Smackdown.

Highlanders vs. Jared Steel/Russell Simpson

Steel and Simpson jump the Highlanders from behind and the fight is on in a hurry. That’s about it for the offense as Robbie headbutts Simpson down and it’s time for Fun With Kilts. The Scot Drop finishes Simpson in a hurry.

Post match the Highlanders challenge the Spirit Squad for the Tag Team Titles. Unlike the Squad, they have something beneath their kilts.

Post break, DX meets the Highlanders and tells them to go meet Vince in his office. Make yourselves at home, shout in his ear, and hug him a lot. More on this later I assume.

It’s time for Striker’s Classroom, with the chalk board saying Edge > Cena. No one here in Texas is going to know what that means so here is his guest for this week: John Cena. Striker explains the equation but Cena takes the pointer away. Cena: “You stupid bas****! Listen up dumb*** I’m going to spell it out for you.” Cena says that it means Lita cost him the title so tonight, someone is getting a beating. Striker yells but Cena has an opponent.

John Cena vs. Umaga

Armando Alejandro Estrada is here with Umaga but Cena jumps him in the corner before the bell. Umaga shrugs it off and sends Cena flying through the chalkboard as the bell rings. A piece of the board goes over Cena’s back and the beating is on in a hurry. Cena tries to fight back but a shot to the throat cuts him right back down. A knee to the chest keeps Cena in trouble and his quick STFU attempt doesn’t work.

Umaga runs him over with a clothesline and here are Edge and Lita to watch Cena being tied in the Tree of Woe. The running headbutt connects but the running hip attack only hits corner. Cena goes after Edge, earning him a whip into the steps from Umaga. The top rope splash misses though and Cena slugs away, even managing the ProtoBomb. There’s the Shuffle but Edge comes in, allowing Umaga to hit a superkick into the Samoan Spike for the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this moving and while Umaga won with some interference, he still beat Cena and that is quite the accomplishment for someone who has only been around for a few months. Cena vs. Edge will be the big showdown at Summerslam, but Umaga got a lot out of this win. They’re trying something new here and hopefully it works out well for everyone.

Vince comes into his office and throws the Highlanders out for eating his food. One of them gives him a spank on his way out, which makes Vince jump.

Randy Orton vs. Eugene

Eugene’s jacket still has the green paint from last week. Orton takes him down in a hurry as the HOGAN chants start up. Eugene gets in a shot of his own and mocks Orton’s pose, earning himself a heck of a clothesline. The backbreaker into the RKO finishes Eugene in a hurry.

Post match Orton tells Eugene to never take advantage of the McMahons again. He would never take advantage of Brooke Hogan like that, because she’s a very pretty girl. Orton likes that song About Us, but he would like to show us his favorite hit. We see Orton giving Hulk Hogan the RKO onto the back of a car on Saturday, which somehow confused Brooke. I mean I know the Hogans are gullible but come on now.

Back in the WWE Studios, Mick Foley gives Melina a shout out and talks about how impressive Ric Flair was in his hardcore match. Flair got extreme, so maybe next week he can wear a flannel shirt or drive a minivan! Foley sings a little Michael Jackson to say that Flair is out of his life but here’s Flair in the arena to interrupt. Flair is bandaged up and shows us a clip of his match with Big Show on ECW. Flair: “That would be an a** whooping and a half!”

Now Flair wants Foley in a hardcore match anywhere anytime…but here are Johnny Nitro and Melina instead. Nitro says he and Melina are good friends with Foley and Flair means nothing to Foley. Flair can be out here all night and get no answer from Foley, but he’ll get one from Nitro. Melina gives us a WOO and Nitro jumps Flair, who takes out Nitro’s knee. Nitro kicks him away and Melina gets knocked off the apron though, meaning Nitro bails with her. Flair wants them to tell Foley he says WOO. The addition of Melina was always a weird part of this story but it was certainly different.

Here’s Miz for the first elimination in the Diva Search. Amy is eliminated and we’re having a Diva Dance Off this week on Smackdown.

Vince is annoyed at DX, and Shane finding an “I HEART COCKS” sign on his back makes it worse. Shane’s sign says “ME TOO”.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

HHH and Vince are at ringside. Joined in progress with Michaels sending Shane outside for an Asai moonsault and some right hands. Vince offers a distraction though and Shane scores with a Shawn forearm into the nip up (JR on Vince: “His boy Shane just won the pony.”). The top rope elbow connects and, after running around the ring, Shane tunes up the band.

The superkick is blocked though and Shawn punches him down. There’s the real forearm into the nip up (Shane’s was fake….somehow) and the elbow keeps Shane in trouble. Vince breaks up Sweet Chin Music so HHH chases him off. Cue the Spirit Squad to jump Shawn for the DQ.

Rating: C-. As is the case with most McMahon matches, keeping it short is a good idea. Shane mimicking Shawn was a good idea and the match could have been a lot worse under different circumstances. It’s good that Shane didn’t take the fall, but can DX ever break a real sweat in this feud?

Post match the Squad sends HHH into the steps and beats up Shawn. Shane loads up some chairs but HHH is back with the sledgehammer to clear the ring, because DX can’t look bad even when it’s six on one.

Overall Rating: D+. This show went by rather quickly but that doesn’t mean it went well. Cena vs. Umaga was interesting but the money match is against Edge. Then you have the DX vs. McMahons stuff and….yeah it’s starting to wear thin. There is a lot of juice left in the feud if they do it right, but that’s not what is going on. DX is running through the McMahons and/or their goons every week and that is taking away a lot of the interest in the feud. The rest of the show was your usual stuff, but they need to tweak that main event story in a hurry.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 14, 2020: At Least That Was Good

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 14, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

It’s the go home show for TLC and that means it is time to really hammer things home for Sunday. In other words, there is a good chance that this show is not going to be all that great or eventful, but commentary will tell us how important Sunday is going to be. Granted it won’t be, but that’s traditional for the December show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Sheamus accidentally Brogue Kicking Drew McIntyre in the face. Everything wound up being fine though, as it tends to be when someone kicks someone else in the face.

Opening sequence.

We open with the Dirt Sheet, featuring a Christmas theme and Miz reading The Nightmare Before TLC. The story involves AJ Styles (here), Omos (introduced by AJ but Miz says he isn’t that important and turns the lights out on him) and Drew McIntyre (as played by John Morrison ala Braveheart). They act out Sunday’s match, starting with a chair shot (Morrison: “OW ME BACK!”) and then stabbing Drew with the sword.

Then Miz will cash in the briefcase, which doesn’t sit well with AJ. Styles: “That is not in the book that I gave you!”. The argument is on until Sheamus, who faces AJ tonight, comes out to interrupt. AJ tries to back up and throws a Christmas tree at him. Sheamus sends him outside and we’re ready to go. The book treatment was better, but man alive Miz and Morrison are dragging these things down.

Sheamus vs. AJ Styles

Sheamus takes him into the corner and hammers away so AJ needs a breather on the floor. Back in and AJ scores with some kicks to the head to slow Sheamus down a bit. Sheamus is fine enough to hit a knee to the face, only to have AJ start kicking at the leg. That just earns AJ another shot to the face and a toss suplex.

It works so well that Sheamus does it again but AJ knocks him outside. Sheamus catches the dive on his shoulders but Omos intercepts a powerbomb attempt. The staredown is on and we take a break. Back with AJ working away on the leg and kicking away in the corner, only to get caught in the Irish Curse.

Sheamus sends him flying and gets two off a knee to the face. AJ grabs a quick Calf Crusher to send Sheamus bailing to the ropes and a quick White Noise gives Sheamus two. With nothing else working, Sheamus loads up a super White Noise but AJ slips out and goes for the knee again, setting up the rollup pin at 15:52.

Rating: B. They beat each other up for a long time here with the knee work playing into the ending. I’m not sure what else you can ask for out of a match like this, which shows you what throwing a Christmas tree can do. Sheamus doesn’t lose anything by losing to AJ and AJ gets a nice win. Not bad for one match.

Post match AJ talks trash so Sheamus grabs him, only for Omos to pull him into the ropes to tie him up. AJ unloads with chair shots to the legs and ribs to leave Sheamus mostly out of it.

The Hurt Business harasses a member of the production crew who is eating a Bronut and wearing a Riddle hat. He just found the hat and offers them a bronut, which earns him some milk over his head. With the crew member gone, the team promises to destroy the New Day and Riddle.

Riddle comes up to New Day and Jeff Hardy and since everyone misses Big E., he should be Bro E. against the Hurt Business later. New Day seems to agree.

Jeff Hardy/New Day vs. Hurt Business

Riddle and MVP are here too. Lashley runs over Woods to start but Woods kicks him in the ribs and brings Kofi in. That earns Kofi a gorilla press toss, though Alexander tagging himself in doesn’t sit well with Lashley. It’s off to Hardy, who sends Alexander into the corner. That earns him a kick to the ribs though and Shelton comes in to slug away.

Hardy knocks Shelton off the apron though and the rest of the Hurt Business follows, meaning it’s time for a trombone concert to send us to a break. Back with Kofi jumping over Shelton in the corner and hitting a clothesline. The Boom Drop connects but Lashley breaks up Trouble in Paradise. Alexander slams Kofi head first into the mat and Shelton bends Kofi’s back around the ropes.

Lashley elbows him down in the corner and the stomping continues. Kofi finally fights up and rolls over for the hot tag to Jeff to pick up the pace. Alexander takes Jeff down and talks a lot of trash, only to get caught in a Russian legsweep. Everything breaks down and Woods dives onto Lashley on the floor, only to get pulled out of the air. Lashley throws Woods around and head back inside where the Hurt Lock finishes Hardy at 15:53.

Rating: C+. Another long match here with both teams getting to look good. The Hurt Business is turning into one of the better teams in a good while on Raw and I could go for seeing a lot more of them in the future. It’s also nice to not have the makeshift team beat the established one, making this a rather fine use of a good chunk of the show.

We look back at least week with Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler and Asuka/Lana firing each other up. Lana is still scared of Nia because of course.

Asuka says that even though Lana is scared of Nia, she can go out there and fight anyway. Lana agrees, which Asuka says makes her brave.

Lana vs. Nia Jax

Nia shoves her down to start and then takes it into the corner for a splash. Lana manages a hurricanrana and kicks Nia down, only to get headbutted on top. The super Samoan drop is escaped though and Lana pulls Nia down into a cradle for the fluke pin at 1:45.

Post match Shayna Baszler jumps Asuka in the back as Nia beats Lana up. Shayna comes out and snaps Lana’s arm before stomping on the leg. Lana’s boot is taken off so Shayna can work on the leg even more, including Nia hitting a legdrop onto the leg. Asuka finally comes in for the save as the Lana sympathy is cranked up even more. Still not exactly working, but this was more of a classic formula as Lana actually did SOMETHING for once. Granted the fact that it was her first singles match win in two and a half years (and second ever), maybe they’re slowly starting to figure it out.

Here’s Elias, who introduces Jaxson Ryker as his new associate. Ryker understands the universal truth, which is that WWE stands for WALK WITH ELIAS. Ryker talks about how Elias’ music has changed him for the better and now he is going to change WWE. Elias starts playing but here’s R-Truth to interrupt. He apologizes for interrupting Elias’ performance last week on Main Event because he isn’t an interrupter. The song starts again but here’s the menagerie of numskulls to chase Truth. Ryker takes them out for a change, allowing Truth to leave.

Miz and John Morrison talk strategy to take the WWE Title but here’s Keith Lee with a coin. Miz calls heads before the toss or even knowing the stakes, but Lee says they both win, meaning pain is coming.

Keith Lee vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz gets knocked to the floor to start so Morrison slaps Lee in the face, which goes as well as you would expect. Some double teaming has Lee in some trouble though and a knee to the face puts him down. That earns Morrison a toss into the air for a crash to the mat. The Pounce (or at least Lee getting close to him) sends Morrison flying over the top and we take a break.

Back with Miz hitting the short DDT into Morrison’s standing shooting star press for two. Miz is sent crashing to the floor, where he trips Lee down to break up a suplex on Morrison. Back in and Lee suplexes both of them at once but Morrison slips out of the Spirit Bomb. Miz gets in a shot from behind so Morrison can hit the Flying Chuck, setting up the double pin on Lee at 10:01.

Rating: D+. Well it’s a good thing that we make sure to keep Mr. Money in the Bank and his comedy partner strong by having Lee lose again. We’re firmly to the point now where Lee is in a free fall and that’s a scary thought to imagine. Miz and Morrison have been one of the weakest things on the show for months now and here they get to pin Lee. All to set up what is likely going to be a failed cash in several weeks if not months from now. How generous of them.

We look back at Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt from last week, with Bray turning into the Fiend to end the show.

Here’s Bray Wyatt for a road trip, complete with the puppets on the other side of the barricade. Bray is glad to be here but he needs to apologize to Randy Orton for everything that has been happening in recent weeks. Things have gotten out of hand and the Fiend has a mind of his own. After Orton takes Him on this Sunday, Bray isn’t sure what is going to be left of Randy.

It won’t be any fun and games because all that is left is sadness. Yowie Wowie that’s alright! There won’t be any fun and games on Sunday, so Bray has prepared some jokes for tonight and they are going to be HYSTERICAL. What’s the best way to measure a viper? In inches, because they don’t have any feet. What do snakes use to clean their car windows? Windshield vipers! That one knocks Bray to his knees but here’s Orton on the screen to interrupt.

Orton talks about how the Fiend changed him last week, just like Bray changed into the Fiend. For the first time in a long time, Orton was outmaneuvered by Him, so tonight, Bray should come see him. Tonight, they can play a game of hide and seek. Bray loves the idea and accepts so Orton says come find him. The puppets approve as Bray says let the games begin. More on this later.

Mace vs. Ricochet

Mustafa Ali is on commentary. Mace sends him into the corner for a running elbow, followed by the elbows to the face. We hit the chinlock but Ricochet fights up and kicks Mace down. The running shooting star press gets two (second time we’ve seen that move in two matches) but Ricochet has to fight off the rest of Retribution. A chokebomb gives Mace two and a fireman’s carry spun around into a slam (kind of like an Air Raid Crash but without trapping the leg) for the pin on Ricochet at 2:55.

Post match Ali says this isn’t over with Ricochet until it’s over.

Bray Wyatt goes to find Orton and asks if Riddle has seen him. Riddle: “Hey bro.” Bray: “Actually it’s Bray.” Riddle has a new idea: Bro Nouns (he has a Venn diagram), which would be great for an episode of Firefly Fun House. Bray leaves but Ramblin Rabbit pops up. Riddle dubs him Bro Baby Yoda and has him sign a carrot for his rabbit named Skipper. This was one of the more bizarre things I’ve ever seen.

Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia is here with Shayna. During the entrances, we’re told that Lana is out of TLC due to the attack earlier. Asuka will still get a title shot, but with a mystery partner. Shayna kicks her into the corner to start but Brook avoids the arm stomp. Dana goes up top, where Nia shoves her down for the DQ at 1:23.

Post match Mandy Rose runs in for the save with a kendo stick. Asuka runs in to help with the fight and the good women stand tall.

R-Truth talks to Huskus the Pig when Bray comes up to say Huskus shouldn’t talk to strangers. Truth thinks Bray is Huskus’ father, so Bray says HIDE AND SEEK and runs off. Truth: “What a beautiful family.”

Post break Bray goes looking for Randy but finds an empty, shaking rocking chair. Bray has a seat and Orton pops up behind him for the beatdown. Orton sends him into various things and then locks Bray inside a wooden case. He whips out a well placed can of gasoline and pours it on said crate, which is then set on fire. The Fiend pops up and Mandible Claws Orton. This ends the most obvious surprise in recent memory, but Orton’s face helped a lot.

Back from a break and we look back at what we just saw.

Riddle vs. MVP

MVP forearms away to start but misses the running boot in the corner. Riddle hits the Final Flash and the Floating Bro is good for the pin at 48 seconds.

Bobby Lashley runs out for the beatdown but Riddle escapes with the bronuts. I’d like to point out that Randy Orton tried to LIGHT BRAY WYATT ON FIRE a few minutes ago and now it’s Riddle talking about how he’s having a sugary treat.

It’s time for the Championship Ascension Ceremony so here are AJ Styles and Drew McIntyre with Tom Phillips in the ring. AJ says Drew doesn’t need to address him, but rather the title, because he won’t be having it around his waist again. This is going to be their first ever singles match so maybe AJ needs to find out a little more about McIntyre. AJ can’t believe that it took Drew nineteen years to get here but AJ is ready to use every table, ladder and chair to get the title back.

Drew calls that an impressive speech and says he has always wanted to face AJ. This Sunday, the match is TLC and no, he has never been in one before. Drew says he thought his goal was to win the WWE Title but the loss and second win changed everything for him. It is so much harder to stay champion and he was the man who lead WWE through uncharted waters. He’s a frickin diamond and he’s ready for AJ on Sunday. Every man dies but not every man truly lives, so on Sunday he’s willing to do whatever it takes to remain champion.

The title is raised up but AJ says he isn’t the only person Drew is facing on Sunday. Cue Miz and Morrison to jump Drew, who fights them all off and throws a ladder to the floor. Omos throws in the steps for a distraction though and AJ chop blocks Drew down (nice move after setting it up earlier tonight against Sheamus). The Phenomenal Forearm connects and AJ adds some ladder shots. AJ tells Omos to throw in some more stuff so we get a table and another ladder. Various other shots let AJ climb the ladder to pull down the title…and we cut off with Tom in the middle of his big close.

Overall Rating: C. The first hour of this was rather good but then it started to go downhill in a hurry. The biggest problem with this show is TLC is mostly set already, leaving little for this show to cover. There were some good matches, but seeing Miz and Morrison beat Lee and Lana being pulled from the match that they have spent three and a half months building (though it wouldn’t shock me to see her wrestle anyway) was a bit deflating. The show wasn’t awful, but it’s one you can almost completely skip (Sheamus vs. AJ was good), which isn’t the best way to set up a pay per view.

Results

AJ Styles b. Sheamus – Rollup

Hurt Business b. Jeff Hardy/New Day – Hurt Lock to Hardy

Lana b. Nia Jax – Cradle

John Morrison/Miz b. Keith Lee – Double pin

Mace b. Ricochet – Fireman’s carry spun into a slam

Dana Brooke b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Riddle b. MVP – Floating Bro

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – July 10, 2006: Another Commercial Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 10, 2006
Location: Tyson Events Center, Sioux City, Iowa
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Everything got shook up last week as Edge beat Rob Van Dam to win the Raw World Title. Other than that, it’s time to head towards Dallas for Saturday Night’s Main Event, which was scheduled to feature last week’s main event. Odds are something is going to change for that show, which is likely only going one way. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at last week’s title change.

John Cena vs. Shelton Benjamin

Edge and Lita are sitting at their own commentary table, as Edge is defending against Cena on Saturday in your new main event. Cena whips him into the corner to start but Shelton is back with a suplex. A snap suplex sets up a chinlock as Lawler is begging Edge and Lita for a live celebration. Back up and Cena misses a crossbody, meaning it’s right back to the chinlock.

That’s broken up with an electric chair so Cena goes up, only to have Edge offer a distraction. Shelton hits a great looking springboard enziguri to put Cena on the floor and we take a break. Back with Shelton holding another chinlock as Edge gets in his version of Dusty Rhodes’ “wined and dined with kings and queens” line as Cena makes the comeback. The FU is countered though and Shelton grabs a Samoan drop for two. The Stinger Splash misses though and it’s the STFU for the tap.

Rating: C. The chinlocks took some of the life out of this but Cena was looking good while it lasted. Shelton is a solid choice for an opponent here as he can have just enough credibility to give Cena a sweat but he’s still not going to be actually score the upset. Good opener here, with Edge and Lita rolling on commentary.

Post match Cena charges at Edge and the fight is on. Lita grabs Cena’s leg so Edge can hammer away and the Impaler into the spear leaves Cena laying. Edge and Lita say they’re heading to the hotel.

We look back at DX’s barbecue last week and the two of them torturing Vince McMahon.

Eugene mocks Vince and Shane McMahon over last week and shouts catchphrases at them. Vince thinks there should be a handicap match tonight, and guess who is facing the McMahons. Eugene: “Dr. Isaac Yankem?” Shane isn’t happy with Eugene’s lack of getting it.

Melina vs. Trish Stratus

Johnny Nitro is here with Melina. Trish chases her to the apron to start and it’s time to scream a lot. Melina bails underneath the ring and a Nitro distraction lets Melina get in a kick to the back of the head. We hit the chinlock for a bit with Trish fighting out of it, setting up the Stratusphere out of the corner. The spinning headscissors into a spinebuster gives Trish two and Melina is in trouble. Nitro offers a distraction though and Melina’s rollup with tights gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here and there is nothing wrong with that on the way to making Melina something. Trish vs. Melina isn’t exactly a major feud but the women’s division has been dying for fresh blood for a very, very long time now. Melina might not be the future, but they have to bring in someone else so points for doing anything.

Post match Carlito runs in to go after Nitro to build towards Saturday’s mixed tag.

Edge and Lita go to a hotel but their room isn’t ready yet. Time to hit the bar, albeit after Edge yells at the desk clerk.

Highlanders vs. Rob Conway/Matt Striker

Striker’s music interrupts the Highlanders’ pre-match chat so Striker can go nowhere with Rory. Conway comes in and gets beaten up in the corner, setting up the Battering Ram for two. Robbie scares Striker off the apron and there’s a double shoulder to drop Conway again. The Scot Drop is good for the fast pin.

Ric Flair is ready to tell the world the truth about Mick Foley.

Here’s Ric Flair to tell the world the truth about Mick Foley. Flair talks about Foley challenging him to a classic wrestling match at Vengeance and Flair beat him two straight falls. That was all the proof you need that Foley is a glorified stuntman….and here’s Foley on the screen to interrupt. Foley talks about how Flair talked out of the side of his a**, got rather drunk, hired a ghostwriter and slapped his name on a book to call himself an author. On the other hand, Foley wrote everything out on 760 pages of notebook paper and became a New York Times bestseller.

Foley wants to take us back to Munich, Germany in 1994 when Flair was Foley’s boss. That night, Foley got his head caught in the ropes, threw a punch, and dropped his ear. Someone took the ear back to Flair, who put it on ice and saw Foley finishing the match. Foley is the guy who ate peanut butter and jelly, drove 1000 miles round trip and slept in his car while learning to wrestle while Flair grabs men’s genitalia today and calls it wrestling. Foley: “Heading into Vengeance, I hadn’t been in fear of another man since I was an altar boy.”

Flair has talked about all these people who had beaten him up and all the pain and agony. They were going to go all night and all day and CAN YOU PLEASE GET A NEW CLICHE??? After Vengeance, that spot that Flair had in Foley’s mind was gone. Flair is a 16 time World Champion but Foley has his own titles. He’s the Hardcore Legend, a 3 time WWE Champion, a two time bestselling author, he’s been interviewed twice by Katie Couric and he’s a personal friend of Melina.

Whether Flair likes it or not, he gets no rematch because he’s out of Foley’s life. Flair: “Foley, will you quit crying about the past???” I’ll pause for the ironic laughter. Flair wants Foley right now in a hardcore match….and here’s Paul Heyman for one of the most bizarre standoffs I’ve ever seen. Flair has talked about how much garbage there is in ECW, but Heyman prefers to call it Extreme Entertainment.

Maybe Flair has not heard about it, but there is a new ECW World Champion and Heyman shows us some footage of the title change. Cue Big Show to say Flair is great but there is one thing he has never done: won the WWE, WCW and ECW World Titles. Maybe Flair can come do that too so the challenge is on for tomorrow night. Flair accepts and the title match is set, only to have a Heyman distraction set up the cobra clutch backbreaker to leave Flair laying.

There was a LOT to cover here. The Foley promo was the kind of thing you would expect from him when it’s time to get serious and the fire was there in his eyes. That kind of a story is hard to overcome and Foley was incredible as usual. Then there’s the Big Show challenging Flair and…..yeah it’s not helping ECW. It continues the trend of ECW needing guest stars and while it’s true, it doesn’t bode well for the show’s future. The biggest problem is it isn’t clear what ECW itself is, other than a place for Raw wrestlers to show up if there is nothing for them to do on Monday.

Vince and Shane are warming up with a baseball bat when Eugene comes in. Eugene can’t talk his way out of the match but they hand him a DX shirt….and then cover him with slime. Shane sends him into the wall and then shoves Eugene’s head into the toilet. Eugene is thrown out and Vince tosses the shirt with him.

During the break, Paul Heyman offered Candice Michelle a dance off against Kelly tomorrow, but she instead offers to dance with Kelly.

Viscera vs. Charlie Haas

Haas gets knocked into the corner to start and there’s the big chop to keeps him in trouble. Viscera stops to shout at Lilian Garcia and gets his throat snapped across the top rope. A kick to the back rocks Viscera but he charges into a swinging Boss Man Slam. The hip thrusting running splash misses….and Lilian tells them to start. She gets in the ring and says she just wants to be friends with both of them, but Haas pokes him in the eyes. The blind Viscera hits a Samoan drop on Lilian (because he’s now blind and dumb) and the match is stopped for medical treatment. Not enough to rate, but this was bad.

Post match, Viscera and Haas leave together because it seems to be a plan. Ok so maybe he isn’t so dumb.

Edge and Lita are a little intoxicated at the bar via a lot of mimosas.

Here’s the Miz to bring out the Diva Search finalists, though he stumbles through some material and has to read a number off of his wrist. We bring out the women and Miz says that’s why he got nervous. They all get twenty seconds to introduce themselves, with the first offering to be our sex kitten. Miz seems to approve of Maryse, who says she wants to be the next Fabulous Moolah, though the fans don’t seem to care.

Rebecca pulls something out of her boot and throws it all onto the rest of them. Most of them basically say they’re good looking, suck up to the crowd and say vote for them, showing the range of this group. Miz has a curve ball: this Friday will be the first challenge with Diva Boot Camp. He gets to say the information again and gets a lot close this time.

Jim Duggan yells at Shane McMahon for picking on Eugene and offers to beat some respect into him. Vince comes in to hit Duggan with a chair and the McMahons both give us a HOO.

Here’s Randy Orton to talk about how Hulk Hogan will be at Saturday Night’s Main Event. Hogan is a legend, and on Saturday he gets to meet the Legend Killer.

Randy Orton vs. Val Venis

RKO in 20 seconds.

Post match, Orton says he’s looking forward to meeting Hogan’s daughter Brooke too.

Edge and Lita are in their room when room service arrives. They need champagne and they want it in three minutes.

Smackdown rebound.

Saturday Night’s Main Event rundown.

Champagne arrives….but it’s disguised as John Cena, who beats the heck out of Edge. Cena sends him face first into the food (Cena: “The steak is actually pretty good.”) and lays him out with the title belt. Cena rings the dinner bell and leaves.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. Eugene

The McMahons still have the slime on them and let’s make this No DQ for a bonus. Vince handles Eugene’s entrance, saying he is lean, mean, green and Eugene, who is still covered in slime. Cue the Spirit Squad to make it worse and Shane gets in a cheap shot as Vince heads to the apron with a mic for some live commentary. Shane punches Eugene down as Vince starts yelling about how no one is laughing now.

Eugene Hulks Up and hits the big boot, which draws in the Spirit Squad for the big beatdown. Shane loads up the big elbow through the announcers’ table but here’s DX to cut it off. Vince is glad to see them and wants the two of them to come to the middle of the ramp. Vince keeps looking above them and says NOW but nothing happens….so Eugene rolls Vince up for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, this was more about the angle than the wrestling itself and that’s perfectly fine. DX getting to mess with the McMahons again works, but it would be nice to have DX actually break a sweat for once. The main idea is fine, but at some point you need to make the heroes feel threatened. So far they have just been toying with the McMahons and the Spirit Squad and I don’t see that changing on Saturday.

DX is in hysterics on the stage and gives us the catchphrase to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was basically a big commercial for various things, ranging from the Diva Search to ECW to Saturday Night’s Main Event to the long term future with Summerslam (whenever they bring it up). That works out well, but the stuff in between is pretty horrible, with Viscera and Haas now seemingly becoming a team. Not a bad show, but it would be nice to not have so many things going on at once.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 7, 2020: Cut It Down

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 7, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

We’re less than two weeks away from Tables, Ladders And Chairs and that means we are almost to the end of this version of the Thunderdome. Things are getting a little more interesting around here and hopefully we get something better on the way to the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the locker room on the stage again for another ten bell salute to Pat Patterson. There aren’t many people who deserve it more.

Here’s Randy Orton to get things going. After a look back at last week when he was a guest on A Moment Of Bliss and seemed to get inside the Fiend’s head by messing with Bliss, Orton talks about how he got rid of his moral compass years ago. Orton is the kind of monster that Bray should be afraid of so worry about who is there when you let him in.

Cue Bray in the Firefly Fun House to say Orton gets little old him tonight. Orton says he isn’t in the mood for games…..so Bray says it’s time to play the fireflies’ favorite game show: Let’s Get Randy. Bray now has a bad wig and a microphone and sends us to the three contestants: Mercy the Buzzard, Ramblin Rabbit and Huskus the Pig. The prizes tonight is a brand new cruces (no idea if I spelled that right) but it’s made from the Tree of Knowledge and forged by St. Louis’ greatest shaman, and the rotting corpse of Friendship the Frog!

The question tonight is how should Orton be punished at TLC. The contestants give their answers, with Rabbit thinking they should sit down and discuss their feelings. Bray: “That’s revolting. You’re sick. Sick.” The solution, with the wig coming off, is coming from the Fiend….who doesn’t actually say anything. Instead Orton says he wants to face Bray tonight because he can face the Fiend at TLC. Bray is down for that.

Nia Jax says that it’s time for Shayna Baszler to destroy Lana for good. Shayna says Lana’s front is going to look like her back and her back is going to look like her front. Jax: “She’s going to have boobs on her back.”

Shayna Baszler vs. Asuka

Non-title and Lana and Nia Jax are at ringside. They go straight to the mat for an exchange of leglocks, with Nia getting a heel hook, Asuka reverses into an ankle lock and then a kneebar but Baszler is out in a hurry. Baszler sends her hard to the floor and we take a break. Back with Baszler working on the arm but Asuka reverses into a rollup for two.

Baszler fires off the kicks to the ribs but Asuka gets the knees up in the corner for a breather. The Kirifuda Clutch is countered with a backflip into a cradle so Asuka tries the Asuka Lock. That’s broken up as Jax goes after Lana, earning herself a trip into the steps. Lana dives at Jax and manages a hurricanrana into the announcers’ table. Baszler can’t believe this and yells at Lana, who runs off so Asuka can roll Baszler up for the pin at 8:38.

Rating: C. This was a nice exchange of submission work until it became about Lana and Jax again because that has been the case for months now. Other than that, we have Baszler losing again because WWE managed to another match between the two most successful NXT Women’s Champions ever and it winds up being about Lana and Jax, because it’s always about Jax in some way.

We look back at Cedric Alexander beating Xavier Woods last week. Therefore, tonight we have Kofi Kingston vs. Shelton Benjamin because that’s one of WWE’s favorites.

The Hurt Business ran into a guy holding a box of shirts and torment him a bit, as only they can.

We recap last week’s main event, with the combined forces of AJ Styles, John Morrison and Miz not being able to take out Drew McIntyre and Sheamus. Tonight, the combined forces of AJ Styles, John Morrison and Miz try to take out Drew McIntyre and Sheamus.

We look back at Dana Brooke slapping Mustafa Ali in the face last week, leading to Slapjack beating Ricochet. Then later in the night, Dana beat Reckoning in quite the upset.

Riddle brings Dana Brooke and Ricochet some Bronuts, which are part of his idea for MVP. With Riddle gone, Ricochet says he didn’t want to be in Retribution because they’ll all jackasses. He’ll team with Brooke though because they both want to take out Retribution.

Ricochet/Dana Brooke vs. Slapjack/Reckoning

Mustafa Ali is here with Slapjack and Reckoning. Before the match, Retribution promises to end Brooke and Ricochet tonight. Reckoning slaps Brooke to start and the brawl is on early. It’s off to the guys with Ricochet taking Slapjack to the floor for a big flip dive. Back in and Slapjack hits something like a Falcon Arrow for two before it’s back to the women. Brooke grabs a quick Samoan driver for the pin at 1:47. Remember when Retribution went on a winning streak for like two weeks and it seemed that things were getting better? WWE must not have been paying attention.

Post match Ali yells at Reckoning and Slapjack for embarrassing them and storms off.

Keith Lee comes up to Sheamus and knows it’s a matter of time before he turns on Drew McIntyre. Sheamus doesn’t like the sound of that.

It’s time for MizTV (including John Morrison, as usual) with AJ Styles, with Omos, as the guest. Omos is offered a chair but AJ says the big tree prefers to stand. Morrison asks AJ about his plans for the TLC match against Drew McIntyre, so AJ talks about wanting to break a chair over Drew’s back. Miz and Morrison start making fun of Sheamus and McIntyre’s accents as the show morphs into the Dirt Sheet. The gist is that Sheamus is going to turn on McIntyre, with the accents getting thicker and thicker. They attribute the voices to watching a lot of Liam Neeson and Shrek movies but here’s Sheamus to interrupt.

Sheamus knows everyone is going to believe he’s turning on McIntyre, but Miz and Morrison mock his inability to count. There are three of them and one of him, so what is Sheamus supposed to do? Cue McIntyre to say the odds have been against him before and he’s ready to take care of these two again. He knows Miz keeps his testicles in Maryse’s purse but Miz replaced them with Morrison’s when he made Morrison his sidekick b****.

AJ points out that Omos is here too….but they’re on the floor so McIntyre and Sheamus clear the ring. McIntyre throws the MITB briefcase from the ring to the stage (dang) and Miz is distraught. Miz and Morrison still do not feel like anything more than an annoyance to McIntyre and it’s not holding up.

We look back at the opening segment.

Kofi Kingston vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton takes him down to start and fires off a few shots in the corner to keep Kofi in trouble. Kofi gets up and jumps over Shelton out of the corner, only to have the SOS countered into a heck of a powerbomb for two. Shelton slaps on the ankle lock and then sends Kofi outside, where Kofi is favoring his leg. A charge only hits the barricade though and it’s Trouble in Paradise for the pin back inside at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Kind of a weird match here, which didn’t have much time to do anything and only served to get New Day even with the Hurt Business after last week. I was surprised by how fast it wrapped up but sometimes you don’t need to keep things going for the sake of filling time. Kofi getting the win is all that mattered and it worked out fine.

Post match Cedric says not so fast because he wants Kofi too. That’s cool with Kofi and the match is on after a break.

Kofi Kingston vs. Cedric Alexander

Joined in progress with Alexander working on the bad knee, including cranking on the leg on the mat. Kofi fights up and sends him outside, followed by the SOS for two back inside. Cedric takes the leg out again though and a brainbuster gets two. The superplex is broken up but Kofi misses the top rope shot to the head. The Lumbar Check finishes Kofi at 4:20.

Rating: C-. I can go for Cedric picking up some big wins and even though it wasn’t clean, this does set up the Tag Team Title match at TLC. Now granted I’m not sure why we’re going to be seeing another title shot for the Hurt Business, especially a Tag Team Title shot based off of singles wins, but I’ll take almost anything from the Hurt Business. Alexander got a lot of of this win too, even given the situation.

We look back at Elias getting electrocuted last week against Jeff Hardy, who thankfully didn’t bust his head open on the steps.

Pat Patterson tribute video.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Sheamus/Drew McIntyre vs. Miz/John Morrison/AJ Styles

McIntyre shoves Morrison around to start and there’s a headbutt to drop him again. Sheamus comes in and trades arm holds with Morrison before hitting him in the face. Miz gets knocked outside and Sheamus and Morrison follow, where Sheamus almost knocks McIntyre down. Instead, the two of them catch a diving Morrison and toss him onto the announcers’ chairs (geez) as we take a break.

Back with Miz getting planted off a double toss suplex as the dominance continues. Miz gets in a shot to the face and hands it off to AJ to hammer away in the corner. Morrison gets to do the same but Miz gets knocked away without much trouble. That means it’s back to Sheamus to wreck Miz a bit, only to have Morrison get in a shot to the face. A double shot to the back gets two on Sheamus and it’s time for some right hands to the face. Morrison flips over Sheamus and grabs a gator roll before handing it back to AJ.

Some right hands in the corner have Sheamus in trouble and a kick to the head makes it worse. The Calf Crusher goes on but Drew breaks that up in a hurry. That allows the hot tag to Morrison, who starts sending Morrison flying (so much that one of the cameras is sent reeling). A double northern lights suplex has Miz and Morrison down again as everything breaks down. The Brogue Kick hits McIntyre by mistake and it’s the Phenomenal Forearm to finish Sheamus at 15:47.

Rating: D+. This took its sweet time getting somewhere but the ending was the right call. Sheamus feels like a much bigger threat to McIntyre than Miz and Morrison and AJ is the biggest threat out of all of them. In other words, they have a good story in there but Miz and Morrison are just kind of there to clog things up.

We look at Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler wanting to destroy Lana. Next week: Lana vs. Jax.

Lana is panicking so Asuka gives her a pep talk. She is going to beat Nia and the win the Tag Team Titles. Asuka leaves and Nia pops up to stare Lana down.

Sheamus knows McIntyre is going to want a fight and he’s ready. That Brogue Kick was NOT intentional but here’s Drew to interrupt. Charly Caruso knows better than to stick around as Drew says Sheamus knows what is about to happen. A lot of breathing ensues.

We come back from a break with Sheamus and McIntyre fighting but Pat Buck breaks it up. That earns him a big slam through a table and Sheamus and McIntyre are cool again.

Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. Hold on though as Riddle comes up to Jeff in the back and suggest a tag team: the Hardy Bros. Jeff politely declines because he needs to head to the ring. Lashley takes him into the corner to start and the stomping starts early. Some choking makes it worse and MVP is right there to mock Jeff. The Dominator is countered though and Jeff strikes away, only to have the Twist of Fate countered into a failed Hurt Lock attempt.

MVP offers a distraction to break up the Whisper in the Wind so here’s Riddle to take MVP off the apron. Hardy sends Lashley outside for a clothesline off the apron. We take a break and come back with Hardy being sent outside, meaning Lashley gets to yell at Riddle. The Hurt Lock is countered so Lashley settles for rolling Hardy into a rear naked choke. Riddle tries to coach Hardy out of trouble and Hardy rolls over to elbow his way to freedom.

The legdrop between the legs into a basement dropkick gets two on Lashley. Back up and Lashley hits a quick Downward Spiral for two, only to have Hardy come back with the Twist of Fate. It’s too early for the Swanton though and Lashley spears Hardy in half. The Hurt Lock finishes Hardy at 13:13.

Rating: B-. I got into this one and they did a good job of making me want to see Riddle vs. Lashley. There’s something awesome about Riddle going serious and turning into the machine but you have to build Lashley up as well. A win over someone of Hardy’s caliber is going to do just that and it was another good match on the way there.

Ramblin Rabbit knocks on Randy Orton’s door, saying Bray can’t wait to see him.

Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray shoves him around to start and they head outside with Orton being dropped onto the announcers’ table. Bray grabs a headset and says yowie wowie we’ll be right back to send us to a break. Back with Bray in trouble and Orton chokes away in the corner. The stomping sets up the chinlock but Bray fights up and goes Pat Patterson with an atomic drop.

Bray’s crossbody sets up an implant DDT for two but Orton reverses Sister Abigail into the backbreaker. A quick trip to the floor doesn’t work for either of them so Orton pokes him in the eye back inside. The hanging DDT connects but then the lights start going out. The RKO connects on Bray but the lights go out….and Orton is covering the Fiend. It’s the Mandible Claw to put Orton down to end the show as we’ll say the match was a no contest at 11:45.

Rating: C. This wasn’t much to see but the ending was a good way to go. The Fiend running through Orton at the pay per view could be interesting if that’s the way they go, but it doesn’t hurt anything if Orton gets the better of Wyatt. It isn’t like Bray got pinned or anything so this was just a way to get to the ending, which worked out fine.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had one of the worst feelings you can have from Raw: it felt like a three hour show. They did move a few things forward and the Raw half of TLC does look pretty good (not entirely, but more good than bad) but Miz and Morrison and the Lana stuff are really dragging it down. It feels like those people are dragging down the good stuff because they have to be there and that’s not a great thing to have taking place. Overall the show wasn’t the worst, but it REALLY would have been better off at two hours instead of three.

Results

Asuka b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Ricochet/Dana Brooke b. Slapjack/Reckoning – Samoan driver to Reckoning

Kofi Kingston b. Shelton Benjamin – Trouble in Paradise

Cedric Alexander b. Kofi Kingston – Lumbar Check

AJ Styles/Miz/John Morrison b. Sheamus/Drew McIntyre – Phenomenal Forearm to Sheamus

Bobby Lashley b. Jeff Hardy – Hurt Lock

Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt went to a no contest

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – July 3, 2006: I Love Mr. Fuji

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 3, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,993
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Then Rob Van Dam and Sabu got pulled over and the police found a bunch of drugs, meaning they had to be punished. This is quite the problem when you’re the WWE Champion and have a title defense coming up in a few weeks. Tonight will probably deal with the fallout so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s DX’s parody and their most recent humiliation of the McMahons.

DX arrives in the parking lot and is greeted by Jonathan Coachman and a bunch of security guards. Vince McMahon has barred them from appearing on the show tonight and Shawn Michaels wants to know what they’re supposed to do tonight. HHH has an idea and the team walks away. I have a bad feeling about this.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and Lita for an opening chat. Edge promises that he is going to own the summer and tomorrow night, he is getting his shot against Rob Van Dam. Then it’s on to Saturday Night’s Main Event where he will defend against Van Dam and John Cena. Those two are like the Philadelphia Phillies and the Philadelphia Eagles, with various insults ensuing. For tonight though, Lita is going to show Torrie Wilson what a cover girl is supposed to look like and Edge is in a triple threat tag team match.

Edge is about to announce his partner but here’s Cena to beat him up. Cue Van Dam, who has heard about how close he was to tapping out. He’s a fighting champion, so Cena can have a title shot tonight. Edge says that’s not fair because he would lose his title shot tomorrow night if Cena wins. That’s cool with Van Dam, so let’s do Saturday Night’s Main Event tonight with a triple threat title match. Edge promises that the next WWE Champion will be Rated R, but Van Dam says the next champion will be Rated RVD. Maybe he does need the suspension to clear his head a bit.

Vince McMahon arrives in the back with Coach greeting him. DX is indeed gone, much to Vince’s approval. The two of them walk inside….and DX drives up in a convertible with women in the back. Where did they get the car?

Batista is back this Friday.

Lita vs. Torrie Wilson

Lita suplexes her down for two to start and gets the same off a Russian legsweep. A knee to the back lets Lita mock her a bit so Torrie slaps her in the face. The comeback is on with some clotheslines but the referee takes the Stink Face by mistake. Lita DDTs her to end the annoyance.

Vince yells at Coach about making sure DX is gone. It feels like a ghost town around here and Vince wants to know what is going on.

Spirit Squad vs. Eugene/Jim Duggan/Viscera/Val Venis/Gene Snitsky

What a horrible assortment of losers, but at least they have the matching cheerleader uniforms. Nicky and Venis start things off and some cheap shots from the apron have Val in early trouble. A suplex allows Venis to make the tag off to Eugene but Johnny comes in off the blind tag to kick him down.

It’s off to Kenny for a jumping back elbow and Mitch comes in for the cover. The rotating beatdown ensues until Kenny misses a splash in the corner. The hot tag brings in Snitsky to clean house as everything breaks down. Duggan gets a rather strong reaction but is sent outside in a hurry. A top rope legdrop/Swanton combination finishes Snitsky.

Rating: D. There’s only so much you can get out of this but it’s the kind of thing that the Squad needed after so many bad losses. The menagerie of numskulls getting to lose to the Squad doesn’t have anything else going on so this wasn’t quite the devastating defeat. It’s going to give the Squad a bit of a push to their next loss to DX though so this is as good as it’s going to get for them at the moment.

We go back to the parking lot where DX is having a 4th of July bash with Shawn working the grill and the women nearby. We get various hot dog jokes about McMahon and DX, but HHH sees Mr. Fuji over there. Shawn: “I LOVE MR. FUJI!” Shawn goes over to see him so HHH has some women come up and flash a WWE bus driver (with the camera not doing the best job of covering things up as the girls walk off). Shawn comes back and is disappointed by the lack of Mr. Fuji. As for the Spirit Squad, they can come out here and take their beating whenever they like.

Highlanders vs. Rob Conway/Matt Striker

Rory headbutts Striker down to start and hammers away in the corner, complete with putting his kilt over Striker’s face. Robbie come in for a Junkyard Dog style headbutt to Conway, who has to suplex his way to freedom. Striker is good without coming back in though, leaving Conway to take the Scot Drop (double fireman’s carry into a faceplant) for the pin. Short and inoffensive as a way to get the team’s feet wet.

Candice Michelle comes up to HHH as Shawn is off in the TV production truck. HHH seems to have some issues standing and then Candice has the same problem. Various issues ensue, complete with Candice shouting YES over and over. They both seem rather relieved and two women pop up from underneath the table. That’s rather risque for this era.

Post break, Shawn tells HHH to come into the control truck, with Candice and the other two girls going with them. There are cameras all over the arena and after having the women get to know one of the production guys over there, Shawn sits down and starts pushing buttons. The feed goes out but they’re still on the air.

Vince goes to the restroom and of course there is a camera in there, which of course WWE has access to. Vince gives commentary (Andre the Giant is mentioned) but Coach comes in to say that Vince is on camera (with Coach’s leg being moistened), freaking the boss out.

Post break here is Vince in the ring to talk about how humiliating last week is. DX is out there in the parking lot with their barbecue but now they are humiliating him and that’s too much. The mic cuts out and we get some noises, as Vince isn’t happy again.

Vince’s voice is suddenly very high pitched before going to the other direction, with Vince saying he sounds like Darth Vader. Then we get a picture of a rooster drawn on screen, with a word balloon saying “I LOVE COCKS”. HHH’s voice comes over the loud speaker and he says DX can humiliate him even further….so we see last week’s human waste drop again. Vince tells Coach to go deal with this so we see Shawn knocking Coach down with the door of the production truck.

The livid Vince makes DX vs. the Spirit Squad in an elimination tag. That sounds like a very bad idea and the laughter sound effects seem to agree. Then we get crickets instead of Vince’s music, which starts up a few seconds later….and is soon replaced by Stand Back. As funny as this kind of thing is going to get and was a long way around to set up a match that sounds like it should be a Raw main event.

Intercontinental Title: Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito

Nitro is defending and we get some extensive replays of Melina’s entrance. Carlito is taken into the corner to start and Nitro claims a poke to the eye before getting in a cheap shot. The dancing legdrop sets up the chinlock as Lawler talks about Melina’s maracas. Carlito fights up without much trouble with a clothesline and the springboard back elbow. The Backstabber connects but Melina comes in for the DQ.

Post match here’s Trish to start the catfight with Carlito standing back and watching. More replays, this time of Trish running to the ring and the brawl, ensue.

Paul Heyman isn’t sure about Rob Van Dam doing this but Van Dam believes in himself and ECW. Van Dam leaves and Heyman gives him that Brock Lesnar/Big Show Survivor Series 2002 look.

We meet the Diva Search finalists, including Maryse, Layla, Milena (Rosa Mendes) and various others.

Vince doesn’t care about Coach being banged up because he’s leaving and wants Coach to get the limo ready.

Umaga vs. Scott Wright

DX interrupts Armando Alejandro Estrada’s promo with a merchandise plug. Umaga would be a better enforcer for Vince than the Spirit Squad. The Samoan Spike finishes Wright in a little over a minute.

Post match, DX interrupts Estrada’s promo again, this time with various sound effects.

Vince gets in the limo….and a bunch of fireworks go off from it, complete with green smoke. After the driver pulls Vince, covered in smoke and green paint, DX pops up with American flags and sparklers. Happy Fourth of July.

This Week In Wrestling: the NWO debuts.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. He was inspired by the NWO video, but not as excited as he was by Brooke Hogan’s music video last week. That would be Hulk Hogan’s 18 year old daughter mind you. Hulk is going to pick Brooke’s date on an upcoming episode of Hogan Knows Best, and if Orton gets to be the pick, he’ll show Brooke why he’s a legend. Oh dear.

Edge says he’s going to win a title, unlike Philadelphia.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and Edge gets double teamed in the corner to start. Rob and Cena start taking turns, with Van Dam hitting a running spinwheel kick in the corner. Edge gets tossed outside and we take an early break. Back with Edge breaking up Van Dam’s superplex attempt on Cena, who crashes out to the floor. The cartwheel moonsault gives Van Dam two on Edge but Cena pulls Edge outside for a whip into the steps. Rob is right there with a dive onto Cena but Edge is back in to break up the FU on Van Dam.

Cena loads up Edge in a suplex until Van Dam takes both of them down. A double clothesline puts all three down and it’s a three way slugout from their knees. Rob is sent outside and Cena initiates the finishing sequence on Edge. The FU puts Edge on the floor so Lita brings in a chair, earning herself an FU of her own. Van Dam is back in with the Van Daminator to Cena but the Five Star misses. There’s the FU to Van Dam but Edge is in with a belt shot to Cena for the pin on Van Dam and the title.

Rating: B. They kept things moving here and the match was better than I would have bet on as a result. Above all else they weren’t out there too long with the match only running about eleven minutes. Edge winning is quite the big moment and it’s the first time the title has changed hands on Raw since 2001. Good match here, as Van Dam’s main event push loses a leg in a single night.

Cut to a STUNNED Cena fan for a great visual as Edge celebrates (with Lita still down) to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Aside from the main event, which I liked quite a bit, this was a one note show with the entire night being about DX vs. Vince. That doesn’t exactly make for the best night, though there were at least some funny jokes. It isn’t a good feud because DX feels like they’re toying with Vince and the Spirit Squad, but it hasn’t gone on long enough to completely overstay its welcome. This week used up a lot of that mileage though, as this was a pretty rough show.

As for the title change, I’m not sure how much longer Van Dam was going to be champion anyway, as his title reign seemed to be little more than a way to warm up the debuting ECW. I can’t imagine him making it all the way to Summerslam as champion so there is a good chance that the title change would have gone the same way at Saturday Night’s Main Event. Either way, Van Dam looks like a moron for screwing up the biggest push of his career and it’s pretty hard to feel sorry for him.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 30, 2020: The Wrong Way To The Right Place

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 30, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

We are on the way to TLC and also on the way to new Thunder Dome at Tropicana Field in the next few weeks. That could make for some interesting changes along the way, though the biggest surprise is that last week’s show was actually good. I’m not sure how much reason I should have to believe that is going to repeat itself but maybe we’re in for a holiday miracle. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Alexa Bliss for A Moment Of Bliss with Randy Orton. After a clip of last week when the Fiend interfered and cost Orton his match against AJ Styles, Orton talks about how well he knows Bray Wyatt. He hasn’t met the Fiend yet, but he understands that Fiend wears his pain and suffering on his exterior. Orton on the other hand keeps all of his pain and suffering inside. They both hear voices too, but the Fiend’s voices are Orton’s. Bliss: “Well that’s not what he told me.”

Orton thinks he has gotten inside of Fiend’s head, which Bliss thinks is what the voices have told him. Or are they telling Orton lies? Who is manipulating who? The lights go half off and Orton asks if Bliss sees what he means. More of them go off and Bliss asks Orton the same thing. The lights come back up and Bliss has jumped into Orton’s arms as Fiend pops up. Orton hands Bliss to him (as Fiend seemed to be begging for her) and bails, before asking who is laughing now.

Commentary throws us to a package on Jeff Hardy vs. Elias as I wonder what they’re watching Fiend do at the moment. We actually see a clip of Hardy attacking Elias on Main Event, which is probably the first reference to the show on Raw in the last three years minimum.

We look back at Drew McIntyre eliminating Brock Lesnar from the Royal Rumble.

We recap Elias vs. Jeff Hardy. Elias accuses Hardy of running him over with a car earlier this year to put him out of action for several months. Various guitar shots have ensued so now it’s a Symphony of Destruction match, meaning hardcore with musical weapons provided.

Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

Symphony of Destruction with Hardy slugging away to start. They head outside with Elias’ jumping knee blocking a violin shot. Hardy drops him face first onto the apron and then sends him face first into a piano. Hold on though as the piano starts moving, revealing R-Truth inside. Cue the band of misfits to give chase, though Hardy and Elias pick some of them off for interrupting. They break guitars over Drew Gulak and Lince Dorado as we take a break.

Back with Elias loading guitar picks on his hand to punch Hardy in the head over and over. Joe: “He’s picking Hardy’s mind!” They go outside with Hardy being sent into the drums, only to send Elias right back into them. Back in and Elias cuts off a guitar shot but Hardy gets in a hurricanrana.

Elias gets in the guitar shot for two, as Hardy grabs the ropes (in a falls count anywhere match). They head back outside with Elias picking up part of the broken guitar and stabbing the speaker to electrocute himself (I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt and say it was because of the guitar strings). Jeff gets in a cello shot to the back and hits a swanton through a table for the pin at 12:24.

Rating: C-. Electrical and rope break issues aside, this wasn’t quite as epic as they seemed to be hoping for. Above all else, the musical weapons made it feel more like a joke than anything else, thereby defeating a lot of the point. Throw in the 24/7 cameos and it wasn’t quite the most thrilling idea.

Hardy even gets a tambourine as a prize.

Riddle comes up to Keith Lee to talk about how cool it will be if one of them gets the title shot. He’s always wanted to hear Drew McIntyre talk alike he’s Fat B****** from Austin Powers and yes we get an impression. Lee vanishes in the meantime, probably falling into the void of the 18 years since that character was introduced.

New Day wants you to buy Cyber Monday merchandise.

We look back at three weeks ago when Mustafa Ali beat Ricochet thanks to a Retribution distraction.

Ali talks about Ricochet pushing the same boulder up the same mountain week after week. Ricochet has been lied to just like them so why isn’t he next to them? Slapjack says Ali has shown him the way and saw him for what he really is: a weapon for Retribution. Tonight, maybe Ricochet will see what Ali sees.

Slapjack vs. Ricochet

Ali is ringside. Ricochet uppercuts him into the corner and fires off a forearm, only to glare down at Ali. That’s enough for Slapjack to pull Ricochet out of the corner for two but Ricochet is right back with a dropkick. The standing shooting star press gives Ricochet two but here are Mace and T-Bar, who are dropped by Ricochet’s big running flip dive.

Back in and Ali shouts instructions to Slapjack as Dana Brooke comes out to slap Ali in the face. She yells about Reckoning attacking her as Ricochet kicks Slapjack in the face. Ricochet takes out the monsters again but gets caught in a swinging belly to back suplex for the pin at 3:30.

Rating: C. They were cranking up the action here, though there was a bit too much going on at once. That being said, it was nice to see Retribution keeping up the momentum as you kind of expect WWE to have them lose every chance they can. The match was the usual good enough stuff, though the idea of Retribution adding Ricochet is a little more intriguing.

Commentary IMMEDIATELY sends us to a look at Drew McIntyre defeating Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania.

And now, MizTV because we haven’t had a freaking talk show in an hour. After the usual Miz and Mrs. plug, Sheamus is brought out as this week’s guest. Sheamus wants to get this over with because they already have a match tonight. Miz and Morrison bring up Sheamus returning the McIntyre family chest a few weeks ago and ask why McIntyre forgot about Sheamus. That’s not cool with Sheamus, so Miz brings up how friends are supposed to act.

See, when Miz wins the title, Morrison gets the first title shot because that’s what friends do. So tonight, how about Sheamus turns on McIntyre and Miz gets the title? Sheamus laughs it off so Miz gets serious by bringing up Sheamus being WWE Champion five years ago. Now his career is a joke. That makes Sheamus take off his jacket and the beatdown is on. Miz and Morrison are taken out until Miz gets in a briefcase shot to leave Sheamus laying. I could go with not seeing a talk show again for a good eight months.

We look back at Lana saving Asuka from Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler last week.

Asuka and Lana fire each other up.

Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler bicker about last week’s loss.

Asuka/Lana vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Non-title. Baszler grabs Lana in a waistlock to start but Lana reverses into a quick rollup. It’s off to Asuka as Lana holds the ropes open, which Nia clearly sees, charges at anyway, and then dives through the ropes to the floor. That was one of the most fake looking spots I’ve seen in a very long time. Lana and Asuka hit stereo suicide dives and we take a break. Back with Nia throwing Lana around without much effort whatsoever.

Shayna gets to work on the leg a bit before handing it back to Jax in a hurry. They head outside with Lana managing to post her, allowing the hot tag to Asuka. House is cleaned until Shayna and Asuka trade kicks to the head. Lana tags herself in and hits a high crossbody on Shayna, who pulls her into the Kirifuda Clutch. Asuka breaks that up with a sliding knee and Lana pins Baszler at 9:28.

Rating: D. This story is getting more and more grating every week as the Lana push goes down our throats harder and harder. Lana isn’t particularly good at anything and Jax is only slightly less worse, but we’re supposed to want to cheer for Lana because….and that’s where the story falls apart because there is still no reason to cheer for Lana. Yeah Nia is annoying and mean, but Lana is really bad at this wrestling thing and is only winning because of Asuka. Lana beating Jax or Baszler off a fluke doesn’t make her look like a hero. It makes her look like James Ellsworth in better gear.

Sheamus is banged up when Drew McIntyre comes in to say that looked fun. Sheamus isn’t sure why Drew didn’t come out there for the save but now it’s time to beat up those Muppets. Hey now. Sheamus is a Muppet so don’t tell him to beat up his family so close to the holidays.

Here’s New Day for a match but first, Kofi Kingston talks about how cool it is for Xavier Woods to be a host on the relaunched G4. Woods talks about how important video games are to him and thanks anyone who has ever supported him in any way. In a preview of his hosting gig, Woods recaps New Day beating the Hurt Business a few times, but here’s the Hurt Business with a rebuttal, because these teams can’t have a match without a five minute discussion first. MVP says they’re 2-2 against each other and Cedric Alexander says G4 better be a dream job because he’s about to end Woods’ wrestling career.

Cedric Alexander vs. Xavier Woods

Alexander jumps him before the bell and we take a break. We’re joined in progress with Alexander hammering away and driving in elbows to the back. Woods fights back to limited avail but manages to drop Alexander with a few shots to the face. The Honor Roll gets two on Alexander, who is back with a brainbuster for the same. Woods gets knocked outside but he counters a suicide dive by whipping Alexander hard into the barricade. Back in and Alexander quickly hits the Lumbar Check for the pin at 3:26.

Rating: C. I really could go for getting rid of WWE’s booking technique of having title matches where the champions retain and then continuing the feud anyway. New Day beat Hurt Business twice in three matches and yet we are still probably going to see a fourth match between them at the pay per view. Kind of like the Women’s Tag Team Title match, because WWE really does do these things more than once on the same show.

Alexander goes off celebrating without the Hurt Business for some reason.

Riddle annoys AJ Styles by calling him Skipper. Omos: “Skipper is his rabbit.” AJ wants to know why Omos knows that and why Riddle didn’t name his rabbit Hoppy. That’s Riddle’s turtle’s name but AJ is more like a rabbit anyway: good hops, soft and furry. AJ shoves Riddle and says tonight is serious.

We recap the opening sequence.

Keith Lee vs. Riddle vs. AJ Styles

The winner gets McIntyre at TLC for the title shot. AJ and Riddle are sent outside so Lee teases the big dive, sending the other two scattering in advance. Since Lee isn’t Nia Jax, he stops when he sees his target gone and the leapfrogs both of them back inside. A running crossbody gets two on Riddle and AJ is sent into Riddle in the corner. With AJ down on the floor, Lee stands on Riddle’s hand but AJ is back up to knock Lee outside. Riddle dropkicks AJ down to join him and then hits a springboard dive onto the two of them.

Back from a break with Riddle hitting a series of Brotons on Lee for one but the Floating bro misses AJ. It’s Lee’s turn to clean house again, this time throwing Riddle around with ease. Riddle slips out of the Spirit Bomb though and grabs a triangle, only to be swung into AJ while pulling on Lee’s arm.

Lee breaks it up and Riddle kicks him in the head, setting up the running forearms in the corner. A Pounce sends Riddle flying so it’s AJ finally getting to hammer on Lee. AJ gets caught on top so Riddle pulls Lee off, only have AJ hit a high crossbody for two on Riddle. Some jumping knees put Lee on the floor but it’s AJ hitting the Phenomenal Forearm to pin Riddle for the title shot at 13:59.

Rating: B-. It felt like a lot of triple threats we’ve seen before but the action was good and they went with the safe and acceptable ending. Riddle isn’t ready for the spot and Lee REALLY doesn’t need another big loss. That leaves you with AJ, who can take loss after loss and still be just fine so they went with the right call here after a good match.

Miz and Morrison are ready for the tag match.

Dana Brooke vs. Reckoning

Before the match, we get a quick promo from Mustafa Ali and Reckoning talking about how Brooke is going to be punished for putting her hands on Ali. Reckoning jumps her to start and hits a few shots in the corner. We’re already in the chinlock but Brooke fights up and makes the comeback. Ali gets on the apron but has to drop out of the way of the threat of r a right hand. Reckoning misses a kick to Brooke and gets rolled up for the pin at 2:24.

Post match, Ali yells at Reckoning because there is no losing around here.

Miz and Morrison (geez) come up to AJ and Omos in the back and offer him a peach pie for help against McIntyre tonight. AJ agrees, only because it would be easier to beat Miz to get the title. They’ll see AJ out there, but he does tell them to lave the pie.

MVP comes up to Riddle, who has a new idea: the Weed Bros Gardening Service. They’ll come over and get rid of all your weeds in a flash. MVP says Riddle’s ideas are stupid and shoves him away, meaning it’s time for a fight. Bobby Lashley runs in to jump Riddle and the Hurt Lock goes on.

Keith Lee comes up to Sheamus in the back and asks if he plans on turning on Drew McIntyre tonight. Sheamus says it’s none of his business.

Here’s McIntyre for a chat before the main event. He talks about doing everything he promised to do and says you can tell a lot about a man by looking into his eyes. He had Roman Reigns in trouble at Survivor Series but then Jey Uso had to get involved. Their paths will cross again and next time, he is taking Roman down. You can believe that. As for TLC, McIntyre is coming for AJ and retaining the title.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Sheamus/Drew McIntyre

AJ Styles is on commentary. Sheamus throws Morrison around to start and then gives him a rather large boot to the chest. McIntyre come in to run Morrison over and it’s ten forearms each to Miz and Morrison’s chests. Sheamus shouts at AJ to come get in here and goes outside to get in his face. Miz’s cheap shot doesn’t work but an Omos distraction lets Morrison hit a dropkick through the ropes.

We take a break and come back with Miz driving knees into Sheamus’ back and ripping at his face. Morrison comes in to knee Sheamus down in the corner and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry with the hot tag bringing in McIntyre to clean house. AJ does not exactly approve as McIntyre snaps off belly to belly suplexes and then nips up. The Claymore is loaded up but AJ comes in with the Phenomenal Forearm to McIntyre for the DQ at 9:50.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as it was all about waiting around for the ending and then whatever they have planned for after the match. Miz and Morrison are a good tag team but both they and Miz’s briefcase are props in other feuds. Sheamus and McIntyre work well together, though I could go for a one off title match between them down the road.

Post match AJ has Miz and Morrison hit a bunch of finishers on McIntyre (I must have misses Sheamus being taken out) but Miz argues with Styles over bossing him around. McIntyre fights up and takes care of Miz and Morrison, leaving AJ to need Omos to get him out of trouble. Omos carries AJ away to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was not a horrible show but it certainly was a boring one. They did their thing of having the same matches that they have had before to set up another version of the same match, leaving fans to need to watch the same match they have already seen, only this time on pay per view. There were good things on the show though, with AJ vs. McIntyre being a good setup, Retribution only lost one of their matches, and Orton vs. Fiend is intriguing. They have some good ideas and goals, but they need to find a way to get there go well. Fix that and things will get better, because this didn’t quite work.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Elias – Swanton through a table

Slapjack b. Ricochet – Swinging belly to back suplex

Lana/Asuka b. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax – Sliding knee to Baszler

Cedric Alexander b. Xavier Woods – Lumbar Check

AJ Styles b. Riddle and Keith Lee – Phenomenal Forearm to Riddle

Dana Brooke b. Reckoning – Rollup

Sheamus/Drew McIntyre b. Miz/John Morrison via DQ when AJ Styles interfered

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – June 26, 2006: That Dark Future

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 26, 2006
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Vengeance and a grand total of pretty much nothing happened on the show. Other than Johnny Nitro winning the Intercontinental Title, it was one of the least important shows that WWE has put on in a very long time. We do have something important tonight though, as John Cena gets his rematch against Rob Van Dam for the WWE Title. Let’s get to it.

Here is Vengeance if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

JR and King run down the card.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James

Trish is challenging in her first match since Backlash when she badly injured her shoulder. Mickie goes right for the shoulder to start but Trish is out in a hurry. The threat of a hammerlock is countered into some right hands to the head and a spinebuster gives Trish two. A hurricanrana gives Trish two but Mickie kicks her in the face. The MickieDT retains the title in a hurry. Mickie spent almost as much time adjusting her top as she did fighting.

Post match here are Johnny Nitro and Melina, with Lawler being VERY glad to see Melina. Mickie leaves and Melina gives some insincere praise for the comeback match. Nitro is the only man holding singles gold on Raw and Trish is looking at the new top Diva in WWE. Trish goes after her but Nitro grabs Trish, drawing out Carlito for the save.

Post break, Carlito is ranting about Nitro when Trish comes up to thank him. Carlito rants in Spanish, which Trish agrees with in the form of “right, right.” Anyway she thanks him again and, in regards to the question on his short (spit or swallow), she whispers something in his ear, which he enthusiastically declares cool. Lawler is rather pleased by that result.

We look at DX tormenting Vince McMahon last week.

The Spirit Squad is ranting to Vince and Shane McMahon, but the latter tells them to watch tonight as the McMahons take care of DX.

We get some fan picks for Cena vs. Van Dam tonight.

Umaga vs. Kamala

This was set up after Umaga beat Eugene and had a staredown with Umaga. Armando Alejandro Estrada and Kim Chee are here too. Kamala chops away to start but gets knocked down, setting up the running hip attack in the corner to crush Kim Cheer for a bonus. The middle rope headbutt sets up the Samoan Spike to end the complete squash.

We go to the Diva Search casting special, featuring the Miz as emcee and Ashley Massaro as the big speaker. The Divas dance a lot and we see Brooke Adams, Layla El, Rosa Mendes and Maryse, none of whom are named. The finalists are out here tonight.

Here’s Torrie Wilson to unveil the summer Divas magazine. Believe it or not, the cover to the swimsuit magazine with Torrie Wilson is Torrie Wilson in a swimsuit. Cue Edge and Lita to interrupt and throw Torrie out in a hurry. Edge says he should be the star of the show and on the cover of magazines (the swimsuit may be implied). He should be the star around here and the fact that Rob Van Dam is defending against John Cena tonight is a joke.

If Edge doesn’t get a rematch, they’re leaving Raw. The fans think they suck so Edge and Lita leave through the crowd. Hold on though as they do stop by the merchandise stand where Edge takes his shirt (which should be in the center). They’re out the door, shirts in hand.

Here’s a banged up John Cena to talk about how One Night Stand wasn’t his finest hour. He could just storm through off with shirts under his arm or he could fight and earn a rematch. Tonight, he takes care of business.

Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Viscera/Val Venis

It’s the return of Cade/Murdoch, who were a decent team while they originally lasted. Cade hammers Venis down to start but Venis gets in a right hand to the face. It’s off to Murdoch via a hot tag and an atomic drop into a big boot has Venis down again. Cue Charlie Haas to talk to Lilian Garcia and that’s not cool with Viscera. The hot tag brings in Viscera and house is cleaned in a hurry but Charlie kisses Lilian, allowing Cade and Murdoch to finish with a High/Low (which we only see on the replay).

Rating: D. The match was just there for the sake of the angle, as you might be trying to find out why Viscera, Lilian Garcia and Charlie Haas are getting a story. Points enough for trying something out of an accident if nothing else, though I’m not sure how many miles they can get out of something like this.

We see Brooke Hogan’s music video for About Us.

Randy Orton liked what he saw in said video.

Shane McMahon is so excites for the match against DX that he hits some furniture with a baseball bat.

Here’s HHH, as Vince McMahon, for a chat. HHH says he’s going to come out here and ramble incoherently before DX takes him the McMahons tonight. It will be more embarrassing than having his pants taken down, than losing to Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania, or even than the XFL (that gets a gasp). Last week, DX sent him a rooster, suggesting that he loves cocks. In reality, he loves great men like Dick Ebersol, Dick Chaney and Dick Clark. He loves them of any size, shape and color. HHH: “I’ll even do an Asian!”

Cue Shane McMahon, as played by Shawn Michaels, meaning it’s a lot of dancing as HHH does the Vince ear pull. Shawn says he is the product of Vince’s semen. He even has it on his business card. He brings up Vince’s eventual death, which sets off another round of dancing. HHH: “Son, are you mildly retarded?” HHH says Shane must be mistaken because Stephanie is getting all of Vince’s money. HHH: “Stephanie and that guy who knocked her up.”

After hearing about what a stud that guy must be, Shawn talks about how he just needs one more shot and he’s so excited that he has to dance. HHH yells in his face to stop, sending Shawn straight down. Actually dancing doesn’t sound like a bad idea, so hit that STAND BACK. This goes on for a long time but the Hulk Hogan bass solo is enough to bring out the real Vince and Shane.

Cue the Spirit Squad to join the McMahons for the beatdown, but never mind because DX drops a bunch of human waste on them (apparently it smells bad). HHH: “Don’t worry: because of Shawn, it’s holy s***.” JR: “It’s indescribable what DX has done to the McMahons!” You mean when they imitated them and then dropped fake human waste on them? The parody was funny for a bit but went on too long. Then the other stuff…..just wasn’t, as always.

We look at Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair from Vengeance, with Flair being left beaten and bloody.

Flair, from is home in Charlotte, says that everything Foley did last night was proof that everything Flair wrote about him was true. Vengeance is sworn and Flair was all fired up here.

Paul Heyman talks to Rob Van Dam because he’s worried about the title match against Cena. Tonight it’s under WWE rules in a WWE ring with a WWE referee. Rob says it’s cool and he’s got this.

More fans give their Cena vs. Van Dam picks.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Kane powers him into the corner to start but Orton gets in a shot to the face and two off a dropkick. A big boot and running clothesline in the corner rock Orton, setting up the top rope clothesline. Kane loads up the chokeslam but here’s Costume Kane, who Kane jumps in the aisle and knocks down. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match that was more about the angle than anything else. Orton continues to be on a roll but there is only so much you can do with Kane vs. a fake Kane. The pay per view match wasn’t good in the first place so keeping the thing going doesn’t exactly sound great. Though at least it isn’t more See No Evil.

Post match Kane is back up and chokeslams Costume Kane twice in the ring and one more time on the stage. Kane drags him to the back and then to the back. Post break, Kane unmasks him (showing the bald head of Luke Gallows, though we don’t see the face) and throws him outside. If I remember right, the original plan was to say that Costume Kane was the real version and the one we had seen was a fake, but thankfully they realized that would have been even dumber than what we got so take the small wins where you can.

We see the Tough Enough finalists being selected (including a quick look at the Bella Twins). Brooke Adams is cut but Maryse makes it (there’s something awesome about Miz meeting his future wife being shown like this).

We look at Rob Van Dam winning the WWE Title from John Cena at One Night Stand under less than fair circumstances.

The Highlanders use a public restroom. Hilarity ensues and they debut next week.

Raw World Title: Rob Van Dam vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging and slugs away to start. Rob gets in a kick and heads up top, only to be shoved down hard in a crash as we take a break. Back with Rob fighting out of a chinlock and starting the slugout. That goes to Cena as well but this time Rob kicks him off the top instead. There’s the flip to the floor to drop Cena again and Rob hits a legdrop for two back inside. It’s time for a chair but Cena scores with the hard clothesline into the running shoulders.

The ProtoBomb into the Five Knuckle Shuffle looks to set up the FU but Rob slips out and hits a kick to the head. They slug it out again with Rob hitting another kick to the face, setting up a German suplex for two on Cena. The split legged moonsault gets the same and there’s the top rope kick to the face. Cena rolls away before the Five Star can launch and then gets his knees up to block Rolling Thunder. The FU sets up the STFU but Edge runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They did what they could here and Cena was showing the fire that made him feel like a bigger star. The ending was a good way out if they weren’t going to change the title, but it didn’t exactly help Van Dam look like a star. Then again, just being champion doesn’t make Van Dam a bigger star than Cena and being beaten until Edge comes in is hardly some death sentence.

Post match Edge says he’ll see Van Dam tomorrow and leaves through the crowd.

Overall Rating: C. This was good enough but there are some things that aren’t exactly making me look forward to the future. Above all else, there is the Diva Search, which is going to be around for the next two months and bring the show to a grinding halt. I guess they need new models though. Other than that, Cena was showing fire and they are starting to plant seeds for Summerslam, but some of these things are not exactly making me interested in seeing where things are going. Not terrible, but the future isn’t looking bright.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6