Monday Night Raw
Date: August 1, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indianapolis
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Tonight we continue the road to Summerslam with the first public statement from the champ (I think) CM Punk. HHH is still in charge and in theory JR will he here as well. We’ll probably start the building to the PPV as there are only two Raws left before the show, which has really snuck up on us. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of what got us to have two champions. I still don’t see why Vince didn’t strip Punk of the title as MITB went off the air or book him in a “champion can lose the title by countout” match with anyone he could find.

Here’s Punk, still with the new song, to open the show. He holds up the belt to a solid reaction and declares that THE CHAMP IS HERE. He has a story to tell us. Punk says he knew for about a year that his contract was going to be up. He loves working in WWE but not the bosses. He spoke his mind and we managed to get some change out of it. Vince has been relieved of his duties and that’s change.

Punk takes some credit but the fans are to be thanked also. Punk is here to make this fun again but he couldn’t do that from his couch in Chicago. He made the call to come back and the timing couldn’t be better. Cena may have a belt but what Punk has is a championship title. This title means that he’s the best wrestler in the world.

Cue HHH who says he brought back Punk because it was good for business. That’s why he brought back JR and Morrison (again, when was he actually gone other than to injury?): business. Personally though, HHH thinks Punk is smug, overrated and believes his own hype too much. Punk says it’s like looking in a mirror.

The champion talks about how Vince has let guys go that are main event level talent: guys like Batista, Foley, Jericho and Lesnar. HHH says if you want to tell the truth, why not do it about why you re-signed? Punk isn’t sure about this but HHH says it’s because he wanted to hear his own voice. Punk has called the microphone a pipe bomb, but what happens if no one is around to hear a pipe bomb? He needs the WWE Universe for the platform.

Punk calls that a 50/50 shot, but the truth is that he’s the WWE Champion. HHH says that’s true but so is Cena. HHH says he’ll fix that tonight and his music plays him out. Punk says cut the music, even though he loves Motorhead. He says he’s just getting warmed up. Punk isn’t going to shut up just because he signed a contract. If Hunter Hearst Helmsley (Punk’s words) wants to talk about egos, let’s talk about HHH’s.

We get references to HHH using his power backstage that he got from sleeping with the boss’ daughter and how he held everyone down. That’s true to a degree but that’s a big debate for later. HHH says because he’s the boss, he can’t break certain rules, even though he wants to take Punk’s head off. “Can you do that, or do you need to go ask your wife first?” Punk leaves HHH who is kind of smiling.

Rey has a tag match later and Morrison dives over him. They get Miz/Truth later.

Oh great there’s a Divas battle royal next.

Divas Battle Royal

Picture every Diva who isn’t champion and they’re in this. Kelly is on commentary here. They’re going out incredibly fast. We’re down to Alicia, Beth, Natalya, Eve and the Bellas. Scratch Nattie from that. This match actually takes a break. Really? Back with more boring Divas action. Alicia is out. There’s nothing to talk about here because they’re just trying to put each other out. Even looks good in pink though. Eve is out and landed pretty badly. Beth puts both Bellas out (one on each shoulder) to win at 7:18.

Rating: D. So? It’s the same stuff as always and it never was very interesting at all. There’s nothing else to say here as most of the match was either rapid eliminations or the commercial. It was what it was and that’s about all there is to say about it. At least Beth can destroy her now.

Post match Kelly goes in to hug her like an idiot and Beth turns heel and kills her, thank goodness.

Truth comes up to Miz and says they’re a lot alike. Miz disagrees so Truth says that having two WWE champions is bad. It’s horrible. It’s…..”A conspiracy?” Miz doesn’t like this and tells Truth to leave. Truth wants to know why HHH had them in a tournament if he was just going to bring back Punk. I guess we’re ignoring Vince making that tournament now.

Cena says his focus tonight is HHH because there are two WWE Champions. The decision is tonight so Cena will be there for it.

The Miz/R-Truth vs. John Morrison/Rey Mysterio

Miz vs. Morrison starts us off. John keeps going after Truth which lets Miz get a shot in. Suplex gets two. Nice leg sweep puts Miz down and it’s off to Rey. Seated Senton off the top gets two. Miz is sent to the floor as is truth. Rey hits a seated senton off the apron to take Truth down and John dives over the top with a corkscrew dive to mostly hit Miz and we take a break.

Back with Truth holding Rey in a camel clutch. During the break the evildoers actually didn’t cheat to take over. Nice to see for a change. Truth continues his old school offense with an abdominal stretch. Rey fires off but it’s off to Miz who gets a seated boot for two and we hit the chinlock. Enziguri puts Miz down but he keeps the tag from being made. Back to the chinlock, this time by Truth.

Big spinning forearm gets two on Mysterio. Rey dives again for the ropes but Miz makes the save again. Nice little story there for the match. Miz hits his corner clothesline but goes up and dives into a dropkick. There’s the hot tag to Morrison who gets a solid pop. See what happens when you build something up?

He cleans house and hits the C4 to Truth for two. He loads up Starship Pain but Miz pulls Truth out of the way. Back inside an axe kick misses and a Pele kick sends Truth into the 619 position. Miz makes the save and sends him into the crowd. Moonlight Drive hits Miz but Morrison walks into that jumping downward spiral for the pin at 11:03.

Rating: B. See, THIS I can get into. They built up the hot tag all match and the payoff for it was a solid reaction from the crowd. Things can be so simple and yet can still work very well. I liked it rather well here and Morrison’s mistakes were played up well by Miz and Truth, who caught him in his mistakes. Nice to see and it’s called psychology. Makes me all tingly.

Post match Truth hits Morrison with a bottle of water and Morrison takes the Finale.

HHH says nothing of note.

Summerslam Recall is Warrior taking the title from Honky in probably the best Summerslam moment for the vast majority of the series.

Here are Dolph and Vickie. I’m still not sure on the song. Vickie says her catchphrase a lot and wants to know why Dolph hasn’t been getting enough attention. Dolph says he’s more of a man than anyone in the arena and anyone in the back. Cue…..Alex Riley? I think I can work with this. Riley wants to know when Ziggler is going to accomplish something without Vickie. Dolph has Vickie step aside….and leaves.

Santino Marella/Zack Ryder vs. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty

This is non-title and the Nexus name has been dropped it seems. King mentioned Ryder’s show before the breaHe gets the hot tag to a ROAR but gets beaten down after a brief flurry. Santino is sent to the floor and Ryder misses the Rough Ryder. He gets caught in something like a Demolition Decapitator at 2:22. This was fine.

We get some of the earlier exchange between the Game and Punk.

Punk says he’s the champ.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Evan Bourne

Bourne runs into a boot to start and the beating begins. Del Rio’s arm work is great as the psychology of the match is perfect for him. His finisher is an arm hold so why would he work on anything but the arm? That’s basic psychology for you: why would you do something to say Bourne’s back if you’re going to work on the arm to end it? Bourne makes a brief comeback and the armbreaker ends this at 2:30.

Post match he puts the hold on again and Kofi comes out for the save.

Here’s HHH for the big announcement on who should be champion. He’s about to say it but John Lauranitis (you try to spell it) comes out and says executive VP and in charge of signing talent. HHH doesn’t look happy here. Johnny Ace (see why he got that name?) says Vince would want Cena stripped of the title. That brings out Cena who says that Ace never thinks and is the yes man that Punk was talking about.

Cena says that he’s not going to strip the title because it would devalue the title. He talks about how he wants to hit Ace again because that was his favorite part about Money in the Bank. HHH: “I don’t have any problem with that.” Ace leaves and HHH says he’s not stripping the title. Punk only came back to WWE when Cena was pinning Rey and said to hit his music. HHH again says he won’t strip the title and that brings out the other champion.

Punk doesn’t like the idea that HHH is going to strip him of the title which he has a legit claim to also. HHH says that’s not what he was going to do and tells them to quit whining. Also to Cena, it’s not Hunter. He’s Cena’s boss. At Summerslam it’s the rematch for one undisputed champion. Kind of lackluster the way he said it but it’s the only way they can do it.

HHH leaves and they stare each other down. Punk holds up his title and his music plays us out. Scratch that as Cena holds his up and that music plays us off. Punk goes onto the ropes and now HIS song plays. This is kind of awesome. Now Cena does the same but Punk’s is the last one heard after it changes like 8 times total.

Overall Rating: B. This was a hit and miss show. The HHH and Punk stuff was good and the tag match was good, but the rest of the show was building to other shows later in the future, which is ok but a little boring for a TV show. Summerslam is looking better now though as you can see a lot of the matches coming into focus. Good sign and a good building show here, but not great due to the wrestling being subpar.

Results

Beth Phoenix won a Divas Battle Royal

The Miz/R-Truth b. John Morrison/Rey Mysterio – What’s Up to Morrison

Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga b. Zack Ryder/Santino Marella – Middle rope elbow/backbreaker combination to Ryder

Alberto Del Rio b. Evan Bourne – Cross Armbreaker

Smackdown
Date: July 29, 2011
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

It’s a new era in the WWE as HHH is now in charge and tonight he’ll be here to talk to Smackdown. No clue what that’ll bring but it should be interesting at least. We should get something of an update on Christian vs. Orton which is probably going to be the SD main event for the I think fifth PPV in a row at Summerslam. Christian having the title now is a nice twist though. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine are NXT and the heat wave that will not end.

Here’s HHH to open the show. He even does a Vince walk down the ramp. Booker is ticked that Cole is still here. HHH is going to start with the things that are the most important and work his way down. In this case that would be the two world titles. The Raw situation is more complicated because he has two world champions. Punk’s name gets less volume than Cena but there are more boos for John. Granted this is Smackdown so that means about as much as a chant in the Impact Zone. Punk has been re-signed and a decision will be made on the situation by Monday.

He starts to talk about Smackdown’s situation and is cut off by Christian’s music. He’s glad HHH is in charge because he’s tired of Teddy Long trying to ruin the show by sucking up to Orton. Christian says that HHH probably wants to establish a working relationship with the champ. HHH says not really because Vince fostered a culture around here where it’s encouraged to step on toes. In HHH’s world though if you step on his toes, he’ll slap you back. The Game doesn’t like negotiations so here’s how it is: at Summerslam it’s Christian vs. Orton in a no holds barred match.

Christian starts to complain but R-Truth of all people interrupts them. He says he’s back home on Smackdown but doesn’t clarify if it’s for more than just tonight. I’d assume it isn’t though. Truth is a bit confused because HHH isn’t talking to himself. Everyone knows there’s a conspiracy against him. DON’T WHAT ME! This Monday, those conspiracies better be figured out. Truth calls himself a man of action. HHH says that gives him an idea so it’s Truth vs. Orton later tonight. Christian offers some tips on how to beat Orton but HHH says not so fast. Christian has a match also against John Morrison, and it’s next.

HHH and Teddy are in the back when Zack Ryder pops up, saying he has an idea. HHH says Ryder has been bothering him all week. A call comes in for the Game so to get Ryder to shut up, HHH makes him Teddy’s official assistant. I felt a great disturbance in the IWC.

John Morrison vs. Christian

I’m kind of curious to see how Morrison is in the ring in his first match back. Morrison sends him to the floor quickly and teases a dive but Christian moves. Morrison puts the brakes on and back into the ring we go. Back elbow puts John down as does a right hand. Morrison fights back and the Moonlight Drive gets two. I think that’s the name at least but it’s the spinning springboard kick that Cody uses also.

Morrison gets sent to the floor and Christian misses a dive out there. John dives through the ropes as we take a break. Back with Christian hitting something that looked like a neckbreaker (only caught the end of it) for two. Christian slams him into the mat and pounds away, working on the neck. Neck crank goes on which makes sense for a change. Tornado DDT is countered and Morrison gets a brief comeback.

He sets for something but Christian reverses into a reverse DDT and gets two. Morrison tries the diving neckbreaker that he used in ECW but Christian rolls out. Christian takes him down again for two and is starting to get frustrated. Standing C4 gets two for Johnny. He pounds Christian down into the corner but the champ fires off a spear for a close two. Christian goes up top only to get drilled. Morrison goes up also and backdrops Christian off the top. Morrison tries something like Starship Pain but lands on his feet. Christian guillotines him and the Killswitch ends him at 6:18 shown of 9:48.

Rating: B-. Pretty fun match and Morrison looked fine. I’m really not sure I get the point in having his return match be against the champ but that’s Smackdown for you. Moving Morrison back to Smackdown wouldn’t be a bad idea to give them an upper midcard face to eventually feud with Christian. Either way, this was pretty good stuff, especially for an opener.

Jinder Mahal and Khali have a sky box.

Here’s Wade Barrett who wants to talk about why he left England to become a WWE Superstar. It wasn’t for the fans but rather to make himself a lot of money. He lost track of that in the last year but thanks to Daniel Bryan, he realizes that again. It should have been his case and the paycheck that comes with it.

He’s going back to basics because greed is underrated. Bryan’s music cuts him off and Booker calls him a superhero. Bryan says Slater said the same thing last week and Bryan made him tap. Barrett asks if he really just compared Barrett to Slater. Wade takes credit for shaping Nexus in his own image which Bryan disagrees with. Barrett may have main evented PPVs, but Bryan is going to main event Wrestlemania. Barrett decks him and holds up the case. Bryan picks the arm and hooks the LeBell Lock, making Barrett tap. Booker: “What’s he tapping for?”

Ryder is talking to Teddy when Mark Henry comes up. Teddy says people don’t want to deal with him right now. Ryder says he’ll find an opponent for Henry. Long won’t fist bump him.

Video of Justin Gabriel in South Africa, his home country. This pushes him like a face, talking about how he grew up in wrestling and how he’s kind of a local celebrity now.

Natalya/AJ/Kaitlyn vs. Alicia Fox/Rosa Mendes/Tamina

We get reference to AJ on NXT this week and AJ’s crush on Horny. Tamina and Natalya start us off as Cole makes fun of Rosa because he’s a jerk. Booker: “Rosa is hotter than a Mexican plate lunch.” Tamina takes over and brings in Alicia who gets two off I think a Tamina Samoan Drop. Booker says Alicia has been on fire recently. What show has he been watching? Off to AJ who is seriously too cute for words. A cross body out of the corner misses and Alicia hits the scissors kick for the pin at 2:12. Cole: “Booker you wish you had legs like she did.” Booker: “Yeah sometimes.” Cole and Josh: “WHAT?”

Video on Henry being all evil and dominant, breaking the two giants’ legs.

Mark Henry vs. Bobby Howard

Howard is a local guy apparently and appears to be about 5 and a half feet tall. Ryder tries to talk him into getting into the ring, offering him Broski of the Week honors. Henry is all ticked off and Booker says get Henry some A-1 steak sauce. I think you know what’s coming here. It ends at 1:06 after a WICKED backbreaker.

Post attempted manslaughter, Henry gets a chair and looks to Pillmanize his leg, only for Teddy to make the save. Teddy says Henry can’t compete anymore which Henry doesn’t like the sound of. Long says he’ll find someone. Cue Sheamus of all people who comes out and takes Teddy’s mic. He says he’ll fight Henry which gets a face pop. Sheamus says Henry is just big and as Henry says, bigger isn’t better.

We get an old Irish folktale which ends with Henry being called a 425lb bag of crap. Henry yells at Teddy and there’s a loud Sheamus chant. Sheamus smacks him and ducks low to send Henry to the floor. Henry charges back but Sheamus grabs the chair and says bring it. Henry leaves and Sheamus stands tall. I know I’m a fan of the guy, but face Sheamus is AWESOME. The key thing to him is it’s not really a change of personality. He’s always been willing to fight everyone. Now he just wants to fight bad guys. I can dig this.

Tag Titles: Usos vs. Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga

Wow the champs are on Smackdown. Nexus has new music too. We’ll say that’s Jey starting vs. McGillicutty. They beat the champs on Superstars to set this up. Off to Otunga who does a bit better with Jimmy. Chinlock goes on and the crowd is silent until Jimmy gets a shot in and brings in Jey. He takes over on McGilligutty and they set for the top rope splash. Otunga distracts the referee by pointing out that Jimmy is in the ring still so he can shove Jey off the top. McGillicutter ends this at 2:30.

Ryder is bragging to what he did tonight so far. Teddy says he’s done enough but Ryder suggests Legacy vs. Jackson in a handicap match. Teddy isn’t sure but Ryder has already talked to all of them so the match is on.

Raw ReBound talks about Monday night and all the insanity on it.

Truth feels good about the main event tonight. He says he feels like a bunch of eagles swooping down on a snake. He has a snake tonight and tonight, the Viper is gonna get got.

Ezekiel Jackson vs. Ted DiBiase/Cody Rhodes

Cody’s jacket is sleeveless now. Rhodes and DiBiase have to tag here so Ted starts. Both guys are in quickly and that doesn’t go well for the team. Double teaming takes down Jackson until DiBiase gets dropped with a modified snake eyes. Off to Cody who takes a bunch of slams. There’s the Rack but Ted makes the save. That move rarely finishes anyone. Jackson charges at Cody but his shoulder goes into the post. Cross Rhodes ends this at 2:22. What is with the short matches tonight?

Mahal is in the sky box and says stuff we can’t understand. Khali says something too.

R-Truth vs. Randy Orton

The lack of music works for Truth. Orton hits some clotheslines to start and Truth shrugs them off. Another clothesline by Randy gets two. Big knee drop misses and Truth hits a jumping side kick for two. Orton heads to the floor and Truth takes forever to send him back in. He takes enough time that Orton can almost get the elevated DDT but Truth escapes into a Stunner on the apron.

Sloppy suplex into the stunner gets two. Here’s Christian to watch the match and we take a break. Back with Orton firing off some right hands, only for Truth to hit the spinning forearm for two. Off to a chinlock before another elbow gets two for Truth. Truth goes up but jumps into a punch to the stomach.

Orton starts his finishing sequence and gets all googly eyed. Elevated DDT hits and he loads up the RKO. There’s a very small trickle of blood on Randy’s lip. Truth slides to the floor as Christian offers a distraction. Orton follows him out and Truth blasts him in the head with a water bottle. It doesn’t do much here other than make Randy mad so he picks the bottle up and goes back in. Orton spears Truth down and the bottle is nowhere in sight. Instead he hits the floor and grabs a chair, which goes into Truth’s ribs for the DQ at 7:54 shown of 11:24.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t all that interested in this one. I’m not sure why as the match was ok but it really just kind of came and went. It’s not bad but I was just sitting around waiting for it to end. Truth’s offense was off all night long with the moves not looking like they were making a ton of contact and not looking very damaging. Not impressed here but it wasn’t particularly bad, just not very good.

Post match Truth is sent to the floor and Orton pops him in the head with a monitor. RKO onto (not through) the table and Truth is more or less dead. Christian has been watching in near horror the entire time here. Orton gets all evil again and snaps off a second RKO onto (again not through. FREAKING OW MAN) the table to Truth. Christian and Orton stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I just wasn’t feeling this one. It has its moments, such as Morrison vs. Christian and Sheamus as a face, but other than that the whole thing was kind of meh. It’s pretty good overall but there’s nothing that jumps off the page at you and the rather short matches overall hurt it a lot. Not a horrible show, but for Smackdown’s usually awesome standards, this wasn’t up to par.

Results

Christian b. John Morrison – Killswitch

Alicia Fox/Tamina/Rosa Mendes b. AJ/Natalya/Kaitlyn – Scissors kick to AJ

Mark Henry b. Bobby Howard – Backbreaker

Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga b. Usos – McGillicutter to Jey

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase b. Ezekiel Jackson – Cross Rhodes

R-Truth b. Randy Orton via DQ when Orton hit R-Truth with a chair

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 18, 2011
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

We’re in England tonight as you can see by the location of the show.  This show was taped which might explain some differences in the look and feel of the show.  We’re apparently a week away from the 2011 WWE Draft which means this might be the last night a lot of Raw stars are well….Raw stars.  We also will likely get some more matches added to the Extreme Rules card.  Let’s get to it.

Nickelback opens us up.  Awesome.  Yes I like them.  Go ahead and make your jokes.

Here’s R-Truth to open the show in the arena.  Cole cuts Lawler and King off almost immediately and says it’s not 12 years ago.  Lawler says he likes listening to R-Truth rap.  Why do I have a problem believing that?  Truth says he’s going to preach the gospel.  He’s been down a long road of trials, tribulations and demons.  His problem now is that he’s in line to become WWE Champion.  Cena’s name is booed.  For the WWE Universe he’s fighting everybody anywhere anytime.  And that is the truth.

Cue John Morrison who says he’s happy but would be happier if it was him.  Morrison says Truth got lucky last week.  Truth says he’s in the best shape of his life.  We get a clip from last week where during a commercial a referee handed Truth some water as Cena came in.  Morrison says Truth is in good shape for someone who smokes.

Truth: “All you’re trying to do is get me to challenge you to a match for my spot at Extreme Rules.”  Morrison: “All right I accept.”  Morrison points out that Truth said he’d fight anybody and the people seem to like the idea.  Truth says he’ll do it on two conditions.  First up a bottle of water and a cigarette.  Morrison says he’ll need some luck too.  Crowd had no response at all to those three final things.

John Morrison vs. R-Truth

 

This is for the spot at Extreme Rules apparently.  Morrison takes over early and Truth hits the floor.  The fans aren’t thrilled as he gets some water and we take a break.  Back with Truth holding a headlock and then grabbing some pinning combinations for two.  Back to the headlock again as I guess Truth was tired again?  Morrison makes a small comeback with clotheslines but is takes down by a spinning kick by Truth.

Truth works on the arm for a bit and hits that suplex into a Stunner move of him for two.  Axe kick misses as does Morrison’s kick off the middle rope.  Morrison blocks the jumping downward spiral (which I think is called What’s Up but I’m not sure), putting Truth in perfect position for Starship Pain to end this in 7:08 (counting commercial).  Morrison is now in the PPV main event.

Rating: C. Just an ok match here but the water angle was kind of interesting for a nice twist.  The reaction to the change in the triple threat is kind of surprising though as they acted like it was no big deal at all.  Not a terrible match but just kind of there.  The best word I can think of for this match is basic.  It wasn’t anything great but it wasn’t bad either.  Average grade sounds right.

Truth goes off on Morrison post match, apparently turning heel.  He throws in a running knee to Morrison’s head, driving it into the railing.  Then he kind of hougs Morrison and says it’s all right before throwing him down on the floor.  He steals Jerry’s water and blasts Morrison in the head with it.  Truth says John did this and hits What’s Up on the floor.  He gets a cigarette from a fan and actually lights up.  Never thought I’d see that on WWE programming.  He blows smoke on Morrison and throws the lit cigarette at him before leaving.  Long segment here but not too bad.

Evan Bourne vs. Dolph Ziggler

 

No entrance for Bourne here other than a faint trace of his music.  Vickie does the regular entrance for Ziggler, who she claims is new and improved.  He has a haircut and dark hair now.  Well he doesn’t look like Curt Hennig anymore.  Ziggler takes over quickly but is caught in a hurricanrana.  Bourne tries to come off the ropes but gets caught by a dropkick for two.

We hit the mat and Ziggler looks like he’s unsure what he wants to do before settling on a bow and arrow kind of hold for a bit.  Bourne keeps trying to fight back with some strikes but Ziggler takes him down with ease.  A nice little string of offense by Evan ends with a spin kick for two.  He goes up for Air Bourne but Ziggler moves.  Bourne LANDS ON HIM FEET but is caught in a Zig Zag to end it at 2:10.  That landing by Bourne was amazing.

Cole is going to be knighted later apparently.

The Raw Rewind is all three of Sin Cara’s appearances.

Video of Edge’s two appearances last week, set to 3 Doors Down’s When You’re Young.  Del Rio is going to have a farewell party for Edge on Smackdown apparently.

Here’s Miz in a new shirt, along with Riley.   It looks like a baseball jersey and says Awesome.  Miz complains about being in a triple threat match and having it changed on him.  The match is going to be in a cage also where you can win by pinfall, submission or escape.  He wants a chair because he’s going to protest this change as we take a break.

Back with Miz running his mouth as we come back in mid sentence.  He’s talking about how it doesn’t matter who does something because at Extreme Rules he’s going to still be champion at the end of the match.  He sets for the catchphrase and Sin (Scene according to JR) Cara’s music cuts him off.

Sin Cara vs. Alex Riley

 

BIG height on the trampoline this week as he easily clears the top rope.  Loud Sin Cara chant starts and here’s Cena at a full sprint to clear the ring.  Well you can’t say Cara isn’t getting a good rub right of the bat.  The GM sends an e-mail to make it a tag match.  Works for me.

Alex Riley/The Miz vs. John Cena/Sin Cara

 

Riley and Cena start with the fans booing Cena out of the building.  Bulldog takes Alex down and he bails to the floor as we take another break.  Back with Cena taking it to Miz FU is blocked and Miz gets a Side Effect to send Cena into the corner.  The announcers talk about the Draft and Jerry wants to know if Cole is drafted off Raw.  My guess would be very little would change as he already does Smackdown but what do I know?

Riley and Miz hammer on Cena a bit more until Cena gets that sitout powerslam kind of move he hit last week.  That’s enough for the hot tag as Cara comes in by kind of jumping into Miz.  Things speed way up and Cara hits all kinds of dives and springboard moves to take down both opponents.  He sets for what looked like a springboard splash of some sort but Riley made the save, pulling him to the floor.

Miz rams him into the apron and takes over as they’re now the legal men.  The dueling Cena chants begin as Riley gets a clothesline for two.  Back off to the champion who can’t get his running clothesline in the corner.  Double tags bring in Riley and Cena and John initiates his ending sequence.  Before 5 Knuckle Shuffle he takes out Miz.  The champ picks up his title to leave as Cena hits the FU on Riley.  Tag brings in Sin Cara who TOTALLY misses a springboard moonsault which is enough to end this at 10:30.

Rating: C+. Not a terrible match but Cara still looks really shaky out there and can’t hit some very basic spots.  If not for the sake of a quick camera edit that ending would have looked completely unrealistic and even with it the move looked bad.  Cara is trying but he looks like he’s about to go flying to the floor any second.  Not a good sign to be sure.

Nikki Bella vs. Eve Torres

 

Brie says that she wants a rematch but Eve might get drafted to Smackdown.  Not really any kind of a threat or anything but just kind of a statement of fact.  Eve misses a baseball slide to Nikki as she’s in a Tree of Woe to let Nikki take over.  Brie I think tries to slam Eve’s knee into the apron but the contact doesn’t seem to be there.  Nikki misses a double knee drop and Eve gets a rollup to end it at 1:48.

Eve poses after her win and Cole cuts it off.  He’s going to be knighted next.

Back with Cole in the ring and he calls out Swagger.  Jack comes out in a suit holding what looks like a robe over his arm.  Swagger doesn’t look mad at him after last week.  They hug so I guess everything is ok.  Swagger pulls out a scroll and botches saying “Hear Ye” by saying “Hear He”.  Tonight we add a new item to his hall of fame career as he becomes Sir Michael Cole.

Swagger brings out a woman that is called Queen Elizabeth.  The fans boo loudly as she reads whatever proclamation she has and taps him on the shoulders with the sword.  Cole kisses the queen and tries to start a Sir Michael Cole chant.  The fans reply by chanting sucks.  Cole says to show respect because they’re all his peasants.  And speaking of peasants, he turns his attention to JR and the King.  Isn’t a King ahead of a knight?

Cole says they should kiss his feet.  Cole takes his shoe and sock off, revealing a disgusting looking foot that looks like it’s dirty and infected or something.  Swagger takes Lawler out and then grabs Ross.  JR of course refuses so the ankle lock goes on and down goes Ross onto the foot.  Cole and Swagger stand tall.

Punk vs. Orton later tonight.

Santino Marella vs. Sheamus

 

Cole and Matthews on commentary now as this is what, the 7^th or 8^th week in a row that the same team doesn’t finish commentary?  Sheamus says this might be his last chance to embarrass Santino due to the draft.  The Champion sends Santino into the corner and takes over with ease.  Powerslam is reversed and that’s about it for this sequence by Santino.

Off to that crossface chickenwing on the mat but Marella fights back up.  An elbow drop leads to a similar version of the same hold.  Total dominance for the first few minutes until Santino dodges a charge in the corner.  He loads up the Cobra but falls down in the process.  Brogue Kick ends this clean at 3:28.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here and a way to get Sheamus on the show.  Santino is a rare breed of jobber where he can lose time after time but keep his credibility based solely on his comedy.  Not much of a match but at the same time it wasn’t supposed to be.  Kind of surprised that Santino got in literally no offense.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

 

Punk grabs a headlock to start and the fans chant in a dueling fashion.  Orton stomps Punk down in the corner which doesn’t last long at all.  Punk fires off some knees to the head and a running one puts the Viper down.  Orton comes back and gets his powerslam to set up the RKO.  Punk shoves him off and we take a break.

Back with Punk slamming Orton and dropping a knee.  Off to a front facelock and Orton can’t seem to reverse it.  We get a GTS/RKO chant as Punk keeps up his offense.  We go out to the floor for a bit as Punk wants to know if he can get a pin out there.  Back in and it’s off to a modified triangle choke.  Orton bites the fingers to escape.  Punk tries a bulldog which is reversed into a belly to back suplex as we’re back to about even.

The bulldog hits this time and it gets two.  Punk is all frustrated since getting bitten on the hand.  He fires off some kicks but walks into the Orton backbreaks and an Angle Slam for two.  Punk clotheslines him on the top rope as we get another dueling chant.  Springboard clothesline gets two.  Punk goes up, only to get caught by a superplex for a long two.  Punk rolls to the apron which is a bad idea against Orton.  Elevated DDT is reversed into a GTS attempt.  That is countered into an RKO attempt but Punk gets a kick to the head.  Another GTS attempt is countered into a rollup for the pin at 15:44.

Rating: B-. Not a terrible match here but it certainly wasn’t enough to save the show.  They were trying and gave us a pretty good match but it wasn’t as good as their Mania match.  This was the standard long match to end a TV show and send the fans home happy which is fine, but I’d like to see Punk get one win over Orton in this feud.  Not bad, but nothing classic.

Post match the New Nexus hits the ring for the big beatdown.  Batista’s Welsh son hits his Rock Bottom/Side Effect finisher to leave Orton laying.  McGillicutty and Otunga want to do something of their own but Ryan says Orton is his.  Ryan sets for a punt but Punk wants the honor.  After taking forever, Punk charges into an RKO to end the show.  Nice ending.

Overall Rating: D. This didn’t do it for me at all.  I know it’s a show over in London so things are a bit different, but at the same time a lot of this felt like it was completely lacking.  There wasn’t a main point to most of tonight other than I guess you could say Truth’s turn.  Cole’s segment didn’t really do anything other than make him look like a bad guy which we’ve known for a long time now.  Nothing of note here and I wasn’t impressed at all.

Results

John Morrison b. R-Truth – Starship Pain

Dolph Ziggler b. Evan Bourne – Zig Zag

Sin Cara/John Cena b. The Miz/Alex Riley – Springboard moonsault to Riley

Eve Torres b. Nikki Bella – Rollup

Randy Orton b. CM Punk – Rollup

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 11, 2011
Location: Webster Bank Arena at Harbor Yard, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Josh Matthews

Tonight we’ll likely begin the build to Extreme Rules.  We didn’t have much time last week as the focus was on Mania fallout and of course next year’s Wrestlemania main event being set up.  It should be interesting to see what Cena does to fill the next 50+ weeks.  No matches on the Raw side have been announced for the PPV so we should get something tonight.  Let’s get to it.

On Tough Enough there was a teaser that Edge says his career might be over.  That came out of left field.

Cole gets a special introduction as the only undefeated superstar in the WWE.  “What’s up Jerry?”

Here’s Cena to open the show properly.  He talks about how this is a great time to be in the WWE Universe because last week there was an announcement made that turned WWE upside down.  Cena talks about the announcement that was so big it takes a year to digest.  The match can’t just be a match though, so that match needs to be for the WWE Championship.  Therefore Cena needs to win the WWE Championship, so he issues a challenge for right now.

Instead he gets Randy Orton.  Orton says that Cena may want a title shot but he had his already and lost.  Orton says Cena should step aside and let someone that won their match at Wrestlemania get a shot.  Cena gets ready to reply but here’s John Morrison.  He says we’ve seen this show (referring to Cena vs. Orton) before but now it’s better because John Morrison is involved.

Before that though here come Vickie and Dolph.  Vickie says she should get the shot because she pinned Morrison.  But if not her then Dolph.  Ziggler says he isn’t here on Raw to waste his time on Cena.  He’s never faced Miz for the title so the line starts with him.  Don’t worry though because everyone will get title shots when he’s champion.

We’re not done yet because here’s R-Truth.  He says that the gospel truth is that he’s never had a WWE Championship match.  I think there’s a reason for that Truth.  An e-mail says that there’s a new cobncept match.  It’s a 5 man gauntlet match.  Tonight (presumably) there will be two starting and another enters at a preset interval.  You can’t get a win until all five are in and the winner meets Miz at Extreme Rules.  I think those are the rules at least.  It was a bit hard to keep track of.

Lawler vs. Swagger later.  If Lawler wins he gets a rematch with Cole.

There’s a video of a baby doll with its head taken off.  You can see the person holding it, clearly the soon to be debuting Awesome Kong.  She laughs crazily.

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Brie Bella

 

Brie allegedly won a Divas battle royal to win this shot.  Wasn’t that weeks ago and she got the shot already?  Eve brings a marker to have an X put on Nikki’s hand so we know she’s on the floor.  That’s rather intelligent.  Brie takes her down to start but Eve makes her comeback with a dropkick and the standing moonsault for two.  Eve gets her in the Tree of Woe and when she’s being taken off there’s a switch.  While Nikki is being taken out Brie sneaks up on her and an X-Factor gives Brie the title at 2:20.  Weak match but all the girls looked good from a looks perspective at least.

Sin Cara debuts next.

Back with Eve being all upset about losing and Gail comes in to say she knows how it feels.  Eve says all the Divas are the same.  Natalya gets the same response.  Tamina walks up to get something and just keeps walking.  Ok then.

Sin Cara vs. Primo

 

The fans cheer for Sin Cara as Primo hammers away.  He tries to toss Cara into the air so Sin Cara lands on his shoulders and backflips off.  Out to the floor and a slingshot rana sends Primo flying.  Primo is thrown back in but gets a baseball slide to send Cara back out.  We hit a modified chinlock as Primo is getting way too much offense in here.

Cara chops away and gets another rana to get the crowd going a bit more.  Powerbomb is countered into a very fast and hard sunset flip.  Primo goes up but gets kicked in the head.  They stand on the top rope and Primo falls, sending Cara to the floor.  A C4 2000 (Downward Spiral with a backflip off the top) ends Primo at 4:30.

Rating: D+. I haven’t seen this big of a blown debut in a long time.  Primo controlled the majority of the match and whenever Cara got something going, Primo would hit something to slow him down.  You couple that with the botch at the end and this was a glorified train wreck.  At least the ending was good.

We get a clip from the end of Raw last week with Corre running in.  During the live chat on NXT last week Howard Finkel said that was very stupid of them to do.  When the Fink comes down on someone, that’s not a good sign.

Corre is in the ring and Barrett says he used to see them as equals, but if they can’t hold up their end of the bargain then there’s no point in continuing.  Gabriel takes offense to it and says the 450 has taken out more people and he’s a 3 time tag champion.  Slater says WE are three time tag champions.  Jackson says he made Corre legit.  He gets cut off by Santino’s music though.

Here are Santino, Henry, Bryan and Bourne.  Santino says if they’re the Corre then they’re the A.P.P.L.E.: Allied People Powered (by) Loathing Everything (you stand for).  This fight is for Kozlov so APPLE POWERS UNITE!  And yes Santino really said that.

Corre vs. Apple

 

This is joined in progress as we come back.  The Apple name is hilarious if nothing else.  Corre is in control hammering away on Daniel Bryan.  I wonder if he regrets leaving being the king of the indies yet.  Gabriel gets a hilo for two.  After a nice long beating it’s the hot tag to Santino who cleans house.  Cole makes apple jokes the whole time.  Everything breaks down and Bryan throws out a suicide dive to take out Barrett.  Cobra is loaded up and a reverse DDT ends Santino at 3:37.

Rating: D+. Nothing special at all here other than to show that Corre is mostly united at least.  Bryan sells very well so the match was about as good as it was going to get given what they had to work with.  Not a terrible match but all things considered it was just ok.  At least the right team won.

We talk about Lawler vs. Swagger and here’s JR to be in Lawler’s corner.  Cole makes fun of Ross so JR tries to break into the Cole Mine.  When that fails he hits Cole with his hat.  Jerry gets up to take out Swagger and we go to a break.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jack Swagger

 

If Lawler wins he gets a rematch with Cole at Extreme Rules and gets to pick the stipulations.  If Swagger wins then Cole never has to face Lawler again.  Cole and Ross are at ringside and are on microphones.  Swagger controls with basic stuff to start, namely hammering on Jerry.  Cole keeps talking trash as Jerry makes a brief comeback, including taking a brief victory lap around the ring.

Headlock by Swagger is reversed by a belly to back suplex.  Ankle lock goes on and Jerry does as Ross says by getting to the ropes.  Cole shouts MOMMY at Jerry during the hold.  Josh isn’t talking during the match.  Swagger grabs an armbar and cranks on it a bit.  Ross: “Your guy had you in an ankle lock and now has a wrist lock.  Show’s how stupid he is!”

Cole calls Swagger Jackie as he rams Jerry into the buckle.  Lawler Lawlers Up and hammers away.  Cole keeps running his mouth so JR finally blasts him.  The distraction allows Jerry to grab a rollup for the pin at 5:18.  Swagger’s face after it is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

Rating: C-. A lot of that is for the commentary/talking alone.  JR’s line is one of the most obvious yet brilliant lines I’ve heard in a long time and shows the basic lack of psychology that is present in wrestling today.  Not a great match or anything but given who was in there, this was solid.  And no, I’m not saying this was better than the previous two matches.  They’re not on the same scale and shouldn’t be.

Cole rips into Swagger post match, blaming him for everything and saying he paid good money for his help.  It was all Swagger’s fault that he lost.  Then he slaps Swagger and runs.  Jerry grabs the mic and says we need to talk about Extreme Rules.  He picks the obvious tag match: JR/Lawler vs. Swagger/Cole.  Smart thinking actually.  Jerry reminds Swagger that Cole just slapped him in the face.  Cole panics as Swagger looks like he’s about to eat him.

We get a video package of wrestlers both past and present talking about how great Undertaker vs. HHH was.

Edge is talking to Cena and will be heading to the ring next.

Here’s Edge as JR, King and Matthews are doing commentary now.  Please, I beg of you, pick a team and stick with it.  This rotating lineup in the middle of the show is getting annoying.  Anyway Edge says he’s going to ramble a lot in this.  He says a lot of people thinks WWE doesn’t hurt and he wishes that wasn’t true.  8 years ago he had a neck injury and had spinal fusion surgery to correct it.

He knew he was wrestling on borrowed time but recently he’s been losing the feeling in his arms.  He’s taken some tests and managed to make it through Wrestlemania, but the tests tell him he has to retire.  The doctors have said he has no choice but thankfully they’ve found out now and he’s not going to be in a wheelchair.

Edge breaks down into tears as I’m thinking this isn’t a storyline at all.  The fans chant thank you Edge and he says thank you guys.  Edge talked to Christian who has been his best friend for 27 years.  Edge was mad at himself but he’s still a fan of the WWE.  He talks about going to Maple Leaf Gardens with Christian and seeing guys like Demolition, the LOD and Hogan.

Then he went to Wrestlemania 6 and saw Hulk Hogan vs. the Ultimate Warrior and said he’d be doing that.  Fast forward 18 years and it was him in there against the Undertaker.  Now he’s won more titles than anyone in WWE history and had his last match in a main event at Wrestlemania and gets to retire as World Heavyweight Champion.

Edge has been in this business for 19 years and he grew up in front of these people.  He runs through his career from running through the streets of New York to doing posing for the benefits of those with flash photography to a live sex celebration (“luckily with Lita and not Vickie Guerrero”) and he hopes that he’s earned the fans’ respect.

He’s going to miss this and tomorrow he doesn’t have to wear tights and now he gets to eat ice cream.  He says he’d do it again, even getting hired by JR.  He drops the mic and gets a standing ovation.  No Alberto, no interruptions, nothing else.  If this was a work, give this man an Emmy right now.  He does his pose on the stage and his music plays him out.  Heavy stuff man.

We’re back and everyone, faces and heels, is applauding Edge.  Even Vickie, Dolph, Corre, everyone.  Dustin Rhodes is there in a shirt and tie.  Still no Alberto or Christian.  No word on the title situation yet but I’d assume Christian will take his place in the ladder match for the vacant title.

Cue Miz to a nice pop actually.  He’s on commentary here.

John Cena vs. Randy Orton vs. R-Truth vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison

 

Two will start and then it’s a standard gauntlet match, last man standing wins.  Ziggler locks on a chinlock after some back and forth stuff.  Lawler asks Miz who he’d prefer to face and Miz says he can’t hear him over his awesomeness.  Josh is reading something and not seeming to pay attention.

Orton fires off some offense and looks down at Miz.  Ziggler hides in the ropes to avoid the RKO.  He can’t avoid the elevated DDT though and Orton sets for the RKO.  The Nexus returns though and distracts Orton, allowing him to be pinned at 2:43.  Well I didn’t see that one coming.  Orton has to fights off the Nexus but Ryan takes him out.  Orton is left laying as we take a break.

Back with Truth vs. Ziggler.  Miz runs down Truth, wondering which version of him would come up.  Lawler asks who Miz would rather face and Miz says he’ll face either of them.  Chinlock goes on by Ziggler as Miz talks about not getting respect.  If Cena wanted icon vs. icon he should have challenged Miz.  Miz says he’s not a talker.  Lawler responds with a facepalm.

The in ring stuff is rather boring, mainly because everyone knows Truth doesn’t have a chance here of winning the whole thing.  Truth hammers away with right hands and gets a sitout gordbuster for two.  Ziggler comes back with a neckbreaker as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled by this.  Out of nowhere Truth gets a jumping downward spiral to put eliminate Ziggler after 4:00 (all times other than the final are of the two in the ring, not overall time).

Morrison is next and will face Truth after the break.  They exchange a bunch of pinfalls to start us off until Morrison hits a breakdancing legdrop and throws on a chinlock.  Miz keeps bashing everyone and is sounding like a less insulting version of Mystery Science Theater.  They hit the floor and a double clothesline puts both guys down.  Both guys slide back in at nine and we keep going.

Morrison gets all angry and takes down Truth with some running offense, including a leg lariat.  Truth reverses into a suplex/Stunner.  He picks Morrison up for a suplex but shifts him to the side and catches him in a Stunner.  Cool looking move.  Morrison gets up and hits his kick off the middle rope but misses Starship Pain.  The jumping Downward Spiral sends Truth to the final two at 4:51.

Cue Cena as it’s him vs. Truth for the shot at Miz.  I didn’t see this one coming.  We’re going to start this up after a break.  During the break we’re told Edge will surrender the title on Friday.  This looks more real every second.  Back and we’re ready to go.  Miz comments on the dueling chants and Cena hits a dropkick to the champ’s shock.  Cena hammers away and hits a new move: a combination powerslam/side slam for two.

Release fisherman’s suplex gets two and Cena goes up top.  Top rope Fameasser gets two and I have a feeling this isn’t going to be as easy as it seemed.  Truth makes the comeback and “hits” (read as it misses by about 8 inches) his spinning forearm for two.  The downward spiral (that needs a name) can’t hit and Cena initiates his ending sequence.  Cena sets for the FU but Miz and Riley run in and hit both guys at the same time for a double DQ I guess.  The last pairing ran 5:36 and overall counting commercials it ran 30:40.

Rating: C+. The grade is for the whole thing rather than any individual segment.  Hard to really grade this as there isn’t much of a precedent for it and the whole match was choppy.  Luckily this had a lot of time as the matches where people are eliminated in about a minute are rather annoying as they’re ridiculous any other time of the year.  Not bad, but hard to grade.  Ending was good though.

Miz says there’s no #1 contender and we get an E-Mail.  There are now 2 #1 contenders: Cena and R-Truth, and there will be a triple threat match at the PPV.  Odd choice but ok then.  Cena and Truth have a weird bromance moment for a bit as they slap each other on the back rather fiercely and Truth glares at Cena as he leaves.

Overall Rating: B. Well it can’t be said nothing happened here.  We have a new stable (and yes I know it’s a joke), a new #1 contender, a new champion and one of the biggest stars of all time retired.  The wrestling here clearly wasn’t the point and for a show with this much going on that’s more than understandable.

Results

Brie Bella b. Eve Torres – Sitout Facebuster

Sin Cara b. Primo – C4 2000

Corre b. Apple – Slater pinned Marella after a reverse DDT

Jerry Lawler b. Jack Swagger – Rollup
Randy Orton vs. John Cena vs. R-Truth vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison went to a double disqualification when Alex Riley and the Miz interfered