Royal Rumble 1992
Date: January 19, 1992
Location: Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s time to get back to one of the classics as this one comes up on the request list pretty regularly. Since this is going to be my fourth time looking at it, odds are this is going to be the last time I look at it for a very good while. You probably know the big attraction by heart at this point and that should be more than enough to carry the whole thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with Vince McMahon narrating a list of Royal Rumble entrants, which does have a certain charm as he is SO into it.

Commentary runs down most of the card. There are only five matches, so a full list wouldn’t be too much to ask.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

The Express (Kato/Tanaka) has Mr. Fuji with them. Owen and Kato start things off as Heenan ignores everything else to talk about Ric Flair in the Royal Rumble (fair enough in this case). Kato’s O’Connor roll is countered into an armbar, followed by a running hurricanrana to give Owen two. Neidhart comes in for an armbar of his own before it’s off to Tanaka for another showdown.

Tanaka bounces off of Neidhart as commentary talks about Neidhart’s questionable sanity. A spinebuster sets up Owen’s middle rope elbow as commentary finally starts talking about the match in front of them. That lasts all of ten seconds as we switch over to the Mountie winning the Intercontinental Title from a rather sick Bret Hart (not quite) at a recent house show. Heenan: “He had a 104 degree temperature. I’ve wrestled with an 113 degree temperature! It’s not that big of a deal!”

Neidhart hits a double clothesline to set up Owen’s high crossbody, followed by a spinwheel kick for two on Kato. Tanaka gets in a kick from the apron though and a Fuji cane shot lets the villains take over. Kato is back up with a jumping back elbow for two as Heenan tries to leave to consult with Flair before the Rumble. We get our first “fair to Flair” of the day as Owen does Breth’s chest first into the buckle bump. A superkick gives Tanaka two so he does it again, setting up a headbutt to the, ahem, lower abdomen (even commentary isn’t sure on that one).

Owen fights up and gets over for the tag but the referee doesn’t see it thanks to a well timed distraction (because the classics always work). Instead a belly to belly plants Tanaka for two, leaving them both down. Neidhart gets drawn in again, allowing a double clothesline for two on Owen. Another superkick drops Owen again but he gets back up with a double dropkick. The hot tag brings in Neidhart to clean house as everything breaks down. Owen hits a heck of a suicide dive on Kato, setting up the Rocket Launcher for the pin (Monsoon: “Sayonara baby!”) at 17:19.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that I miss in modern wrestling: take some talented people and put them in the ring together for a good while with little on the line. I get why it wouldn’t go over well today, but dang it is a nice flashback to a different era. The New Foundation wasn’t exactly as good as the Harts, but they were good enough to put in a nice effort like this one here.

We look at the Mountie defeating the sick Bret Hart to win the Intercontinental Title. Mountie kept the beatdown going after the match until Roddy Piper made the save. Another sneak attack from Mountie didn’t work, but now we have a title match.

Jimmy Hart is ECSTATIC over the Mountie winning the title. Mountie promises to beat Roddy Piper up, while taking his manhood AND his skirt.

Roddy Piper says we’re looking at one of the original Village People in the Mountie. First, Mountie wants to take Piper’s integrity, but Piper doesn’t have any! Then he’s coming for Piper’s manhood. Piper is here to wrestle, but he doesn’t know what Mountie is here to do. Tonight, Piper can win two titles and now he has to go win the first one.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Mountie is defending and has Jimmy Hart in his corner. Piper unloads to start and Mountie bails outside fast. A Hart distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, followed by some leapfrogs back inside. You can only do that to Piper for so long though as he sends Mountie into the buckle a few times. There’s a bulldog out of the corner as commentary bickers about how many rights Heenan has.

Hart’s distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, including some face first rams into the buckle. A sunset flip gives Piper two as Heenan again claims the 113 degree temperature, which he survived thanks to half of a children’s Aspirin. Back up and Piper sends him over the top, only to have Mountie skin the cat. Piper sends him into an interfering Hart though, grabs the sleeper, and wins the title at 5:20.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing, but was anyone buying the Mountie as having a chance against Piper? The whole thing was a way to transition the title off of Bret to set up the eventual showdown with Piper at Wrestlemania. Piper winning a title after all those years as a star is great to see though and that was the other major point. Bad match, but a good result.

Post match Hart tries to come in with Mountie’s shock stick, which Piper takes and uses on the Mountie instead. We do get a classic Fink AND NEEEEW moment, with Piper getting to hold the title for a great moment.

Hulk Hogan is ready to win the Royal Rumble, where he won’t have any friends because he wants the WWF Title back.

The Bushwhackers and Jamison (a disturbingly nerdy guy with a bad suit and a sock sitting out of his pocket) are ready for the Beverly Sisters’ final fling. They’ll beat up the Genius too.

Bushwhackers vs. Beverly Brothers

Jamison and the Genius are here too. We hit the stall button to start, with two and a half minutes passing before the Brothers jump Luke to start the physicality. Luke fights up and bites the back of Blake’s tights, setting up a double forearm to put the Brothers outside. We settle down to Beau vs. Butch as commentary talks about Jack Tunney actually doing something lately.

Beau gets in a cheap shot to take over as commentary talks about 20,000 fans here (17,000 official, so at least it’s not that far off). Everything breaks down again and the Bushwhackers clear the ring for the second time as we are somehow almost seven minutes into this. The Beverlies both try sneaking up from behind to even less avail but this time Butch goes outside to beat up Beau. A cheap shot to Luke finally gets us into a more traditional match, with the Beverlys taking turns with the elbows. Jamison: “Stop cheating!”

A backbreaker puts Luke down again and there’s a headbutt to the back for two. Heenan rants about his tax money going to Jamison as this match just keeps going. Luke gets beaten up again as genius slaps Jamison. One shot is finally enough for Luke to get over for the tag to Butch so house can be cleaned. The Battering Ram hits Blake and a running headbutt gets two on Beau. The referee has to get Luke out though and Blake hits a top rope ax handle to pin Butch at 14:56.

Rating: D-. Yowza this was a horrible match, with nothing good in the way of wrestling, a bunch of repetitive stalling and a lame ending. This was one of the worst pay per view matches I’ve ever seen from the WWF and the time would have been better used by airing an old pinball tournament. Awful in every sense.

Post match the Bushwhackers clean house and hold Genius back so Jamison can kick him in the shin. Good for him I’m sure.

The Legion Of Doom is ready for the Natural Disasters because they’ll fight anyone. Hawk wants the Disasters’ tongues hanging out like dead deers’.

Tag Team Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Legion Of Doom

The Disasters, with Jimmy Hart, are challenging. Hawk wastes no time in swinging away at Typhoon and everything breaks down quickly. Earthquake comes in and shrugs off Hawk’s dropkick, only to miss a (decent actually) dropkick attempt of his own. Gorilla: “He wouldn’t have hit Sky Low Low with that one!” Well no, as it would have been two feet above Low Low’s head. Think Monsoon.

It’s off to Animal for a double clothesline and knockdown, followed by Animal’s failed slam attempt to put him in trouble again. That lasts all of three seconds as Typhoon comes back in and gets his arm cranked, allowing the tag back to Hawk. A backbreaker cuts Hawk down and Typhoon adds a running crotch attack to the back. The required bearhug goes on before Earthquake steps on Hawk’s ribs.

Another bearhug goes on as Heenan is trying to pay someone to go to the back to get Flair information. This one is broken up just as quickly as the other, leaving Earthquake to miss a splash in the corner. Hawk manages a middle rope elbow to the head and it’s finally off to Animal to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and they fight to the floor, with only Typhoon beating the count back in for the win at 9:24.

Rating: D+. While it wasn’t good, this is just slightly better than the other tag match and that is what matters here. At the end of the day, the match was about setting up something in the future, even if that didn’t quite happen. The match wasn’t exactly fun to watch, as Earthquake and Typhoon are only going to be able to do so much in the ring. Throw in the LOD being a bit limited in their own right and this was about as good as it was going to get.

Post match the brawl is on and the Disasters are cleared out.

In the back, Jimmy Hart and the Disasters rant a lot.

Roddy Piper is very happy with his win and dedicates it to his son Colt.

After a clip of the famous Barber Shop split, Shawn Michaels doesn’t care that Marty Jannetty is out of the Rumble because Shawn is going to win it anyway.

Ric Flair has drawn #3 and doesn’t care, because he’s Ric Flair.

Randy Savage is ready to get back to the top of the mountain.

Sid Justice is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Repo Man is ready to repossess the WWF Title.

British Bulldog is ready to win another battle royal, just like he won another one last year at Royal Albert Hall in London.

Jake Roberts is ready to get what he needs and beat up Randy Savage at the same time. Trust him.

Mr. Perfect and Ric Flair are ready for the latter to prove that he is the REAL World’s Champion.

Paul Bearer is ready for 29 caskets as the Undertaker is WWF Champion again.

Hulk Hogan is ready for it to be every man for himself in the Royal Rumble so he can get the title back. Hogan was sounding rather whiny and a bit paranoid here.

Jack Tunney gives us a brief welcome and says may the best man win.

WWF Title: Royal Rumble

For the vacant title (after Hulk Hogan cheated to take it back from Undertaker) with two minute intervals. British Bulldog is in at #1 and Ted DiBiase is in at #2 as Heenan is already calculating odds on Flair’s ring time. Bulldog hammers away but charges into an elbow in the corner. DiBiase grabs some suplexes as Heenan suggests going through the ropes and hiding to kill time.

Bulldog gets thrown over the top but hangs on and runs back in to toss DiBiase, leaving Heenan upset. Ric Flair is in at #3 (Heenan: “NO!” Monsoon: “YES!”), sending Monsoon into a statement about how no one from entrants #1-5 has ever made it to the end. Heenan apologizes for not being able to be objective as Bulldog grabs the gorilla press. Flair gets in a poke to the eye for a breather as Jerry Sags is in at #4.

Bulldog gets double teamed as Heenan wants Flair to go rest in the corner. A double clothesline gets Bulldog out of trouble and there’s a dropkick to get rid of Sags (Heenan: “OH NO!”). Haku is in at #5 and goes after Flair (Heenan: “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HAKU??? HAVE YOU GONE NUTS???” You know, because HAKU is most well known for his calm, rational demeanor), who actually takes him down and drops a knee to the head. Bulldog gets rid of Flair and Shawn Michaels is in at #6.

A superkick drops Flair fast (not yet the big time finisher) and another….lands in the general vicinity of Bulldog’s head as Heenan wants a stiff drink. We also start the weird timing as Heenan says Flair has been in over ten minutes despite the match not even going for ten minutes yet. Tito Santana is in at #7 and has Flair upside down in the corner (Heenan: “PERFECT! GET OUT HERE!”).

Flair slips out and gives Santana a belly to back suplex, followed by a low blow to Bulldog (Heenan: “I’d do that to my grandmother if I had to!”). The Barbarian is in at #8 (Heenan: “When I managed him, he barely liked me!”) and everyone brawls around without much going on. The Texas Tornado is in at #9 and goes right after Flair as Heenan is sounding increasingly desperate. Things slow down even more (fair enough) as the Repo Man is in at #10, giving us Bulldog, Flair, Michaels, Santana Barbarian, Tornado and Repo Man.

Barbarian and Flair double team Tornado and it’s Greg Valentine (in his bizarre face run) at #11. Naturally he goes right for Flair as Heenan talks about how the Perfect Plan called for Flair to go no more than 30 minutes. Flair kicks Repo Man low and it’s Nikolai Volkoff (Heenan: “300 pound Lithuanian!”) in at #11. Valentine grabs the Figure Four on Flair (Heenan….well you can just imagine) as Volkoff is tossed out to clear some of the ring. The Big Boss Man is in at #12 to pick up the energy a bit.

There goes Valentine, with Repo Man and Bulldog following him. Tornado is out as well as Heenan is begging Flair to get away from Boss Man. Santana and Michaels are both out and it’s Hercules at #13. Flair chops at Barbarian (Heenan: “NO RIC!”) and gets gorilla pressed for his efforts. Hercules dumps Barbarian (saving Flair in the process) but gets tossed as well. Boss Man clotheslines Flair but misses a charge and gets low bridged out, leaving Flair alone in the ring.

It’s Roddy Piper in at #14 and Heenan is beside himself as Flair is in even bigger trouble. Piper beats him up and takes it to the floor to keep up the beating. Back in and it’s an airplane spin into the sleeper to knock Flair mostly out. Jake Roberts is in at #15 to sit in the corner as the sleeper continues. Roberts goes after Piper (Heenan: “Thank you Jake!”) before hitting the short arm clothesline (Heenan: “You no good….”). Piper makes the save (Heenan: “It’s not a skirt! It’s a kilt!”) and Flair puts the Figure Four on Roberts. That’s broken up by Piper (Heenan: “You no good skirt wearing…..”) and it’s Jim Duggan in at #16.

Even Monsoon is praising Flair’s conditioning at this point as Heenan thinks Hulk Hogan is behind the order of entrants. Duggan punches Flair into the corner as Roberts does the same to Piper. It’s IRS in at #17 and it’s a double noggin knocker from Duggan to Roberts/Flair, giving us a Flair Flop. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 and he still looks weird in those long tights. Heenan: “He’s wasting time!” Monsoon: “He is not!” Heenan: “I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.”

Piper chops on Flair in the corner but hands him off to Roberts, who can’t get rid of him. The Undertaker is in at #20 and Heenan is….oddly kind of calm about it. That gives us Flair, Piper, Roberts, Duggan, IRS, Snuka and Undertaker, with Snuka being tossed almost immediately. Undertaker grabs Flair by the throat, with Heenan declaring that everything is over. Duggan saves Flair and gets kicked low by Undertaker (that’s a weird visual) as Randy Savage is in at #21, meaning Roberts bails straight to the floor (not out).

Undertaker jumps Savage from behind so Piper comes back in, only to get kneed over the top by Savage. Hold on though as Savage dives over the top to go after Roberts again….but Undertaker throws Savage back inside, apparently because he wasn’t THROWN over the top. Ignore that this goes against previously established rules, but since when has that mattered? Flair stomps on Savage in the corner and hits Undertaker low, the latter of which doesn’t seem to matter.

Berzerker is in at #22 and hammers on various people as Heenan panics at Flair going after Savage. Undertaker and Piper choke Flair until Virgil is in at #23. Flair survives an Undertaker elimination attempt and it’s Colonel Mustafa in at #24. Monsoon refers to Flair as “Martel” twice, even as Duggan punches Flair in the face. Piper beats on Flair in the corner and it’s Rick Martel in at #25.

Heenan thinks some of the bigger names have gotten some great luck in the drawing, again forgetting an announcement on Superstars that some of the bigger names were guaranteed later numbers. Mustafa is out and everyone brawls….until Hulk Hogan is in at #26 (Heenan: “OH MY GOD NO!”). The brawl is on again as Heenan starts bargaining with God to let Heenan win. Hogan gets rid of Undertaker and Berzerker back to back with Virgil and Duggan going out at the same time.

Skinner is in at #27 as Heenan thinks Flair should be the Real World’s Champion no matter what. Sgt. Slaughter is in at #28 as Skinner is out. Hogan and Piper go at it, with Monsoon sounding almost surprised because they’re friends, despite having one of the most famous rivalries in wrestling history. Flair officially sets the all time record as Sid Justice is in at #29 to quite the reaction.

More brawling ensues as Warlord is in at #30, giving us a final grouping of Flair, Piper, IRS, Savage, Martel, Hogan, Slaughter, Sid and Warlord. Hogan slams Flair at the top and they both roll outside (not eliminated) to fight some more outside. Sid dumps Slaughter as Monsoon can’t believe that Flair is still here. Granted he also thinks Flair has been here for an hour when we’re still coming up on an hour into the match.

Piper pulls IRS out by the tie and Sid dumps Warlord to get us down to six. Sid gets rid of Martel and Piper, leaving us with Savage, Sid, Hogan and Flair, which makes me want to play Super Wrestlemania. There goes Savage as well, leaving Hogan to punch Flair over the top. Hogan goes to dump him but Sid tosses Hogan instead. Ever the nice guy, Hogan grabs Sid’s arm because “you stole my belt”, allowing Flair to dump Sid (with Hogan’s help) for the win and the title at 1:02:02. Heenan: “YESx50!”

Rating: A. Yes it’s still great and it still works as well as probably any Rumble would for almost ten more years. Flair has a great performance in setting the record and never once seeming like he was laying around for any extended period of time. You also have a star studded lineup with all kinds of people feeling like dark horse candidates, meaning there was little down time. Then of course there’s Heenan, who has the call of a lifetime as you can picture him losing his mind at everything falling apart. Monsoon laughing at Heenan when Flair comes out early but then respecting Flair by the end is great too, making this a masterpiece.

Post match Hogan and Sid bicker a lot, setting up Wrestlemania. I remember watching this at around four years old and wondering why Hogan was upset when he was eliminated without breaking any rules. There was no reason for him to be angry over this and he was just whining.

In the back, Jack Tunney presents Ric Flair with the title, allowing Flair to give the incredible “with a tear in my eye” speech, talking about how this is the title that matters the most in the world. Flair, Perfect and Heenan all WOO in celebration. Perfect: “We’re not the kind of guys to say we told you so but….we told you so!” After Flair cracks up at that one (and Gene gets in the infamous “PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT!”), Gene signs off and sends us to the highlight package to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a weird show as the main event is the ONLY thing that matters (though the Piper title win was a very nice moment) and everything else is pretty minor. The problem is one of those two matches is horrible and another is pretty bad, bringing the overall rating down a bit. That being said, this is the definition of a one match show and there is little reason to watch anything but the Intercontinental Title match and the main event. One is a feel good moment and the other is an all time classic, so we’ll call this quite the success.

WWF, 2022, 1992, Redo, Royal Rumble, New Foundation, Orient Express, Mountie, Roddy Piper, Jimmy Hart, Hulk Hogan, Bushwhackers, Beverly Brothers, Jamison, The Genius, Natural Disasters, Legion Of Doom, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Sid Justice, Randy Savage, Undertaker

Ratings Comparison

New Foundation vs. Orient Express

Original: C+
2013 Redo: B-
2018 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C+

The Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

Original: B
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

Original: F+
2013 Redo: T (The Worst Match In Royal Rumble History)
2018 Redo: F
2023 Redo: D-

Legion of Doom vs. Natural Disasters

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B
2023 Redo: A-

I’m pretty much done with this show after this one, though it’s still rather great.

Best Of Big Boss Man
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Rick Stewart, Lord Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper, Bobby Heenan, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is one of the signature series of the WWE Vault as you get to see various wrestlers throughout their careers. In this case it’s someone who is one of the most memorable parts of the company in his day but he only had so much success. This should be a lot of fun as I was quite the fan so let’s get to it.

As usual, we open with a quick intro.

From Starrcade 1986.

Big Bubba Rogers vs. Ron Garvin

Street fight (meaning you win by pinfall or a ten count) and Jim Cornette is here with Rogers (as he was Cornette’s bodyguard). Garvin punches him in the face to start and Bubba is actually staggered, which wasn’t something that happened very often back then. For some reason Garvin agrees to a test of strength but tis a ruse as he hits Bubba in the face again, this time for a trip to the floor.

Back in and Bubba powers him into the corner and then sends him outside (Cornette: “GARVIN’S A COWARD! HE’S TRYING TO RUN!”). Garvin gets back in and gets sent back outside, where he grabs a drink to throw into Bubba’s face. Now the punches start working and Garvin chokes away a bit, only to get kneed in the face. A splash in the corner gives Bubba eight and some hard stomping gets the same, even with Garvin busted open.

Bubba drops an elbow for two and then stands up, allowing Garvin to get up at an eight count (as I try to figure out if that makes sense). A rope gets brought in so Garvin punches him down and chokes with said rope, followed by a bite to bust Bubba open. Bubba is able to come right back with a bearhug, only for Garvin to use some hard headbutts to break it up. Garvin knocks him out to the floor for a six (Cornette: “BUBBA! FIGHT BACK!”) but Garvin just hits Bubba in the head a few more times.

Bubba might hit him low as they go back inside, where Garvin gets in a slam off the top. The kickout sends Garvin onto the referee so he muscles Bubba up for a Texas piledriver. That earns him a tennis racket shot to the head and they’re both out at ten. That doesn’t work though so it’s the first man to his feet to win. Cornette comes in to yell and gets shoved down by the referee, allowing him to to hit Garvin in the knee with the racket. That’s enough for Bubba to be up first for the win at 11:52.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t exactly what you would expect from a street fight, but it was two hard hitting guys beating each other up. I could have gone for a little something more, but at least they felt like they were having a fight. Garvin was laying in those shots and HIT HIM IN THE FACE is quite the logical way to go. Cornette cheating was exactly what you would expect from him and it fit in well with the ending.

From New York City, March 18, 1989.

Big Boss Man vs. Hulk Hogan

In a cage in MSG and Slick is here with the Boss Man. Well in theory as Hogan chases Slick off before getting inside. Hayes says he’s never seen someone climb over the top and get into a cage. This isn’t even the first time he’s called a match where Hogan came in that way. Hogan chokes him with the shirt from behind to start and sends Boss Man into the corner for some running clotheslines.

One of them puts Boss Man down and sets up a suplex as Hogan is rather energetic here. Boss Man gets in a shot of his own and goes up but Hogan is there to chop away on the ropes. Hogan catches him on top and they strike it out, only for Hogan to be shoved down in a bit crash. That’s enough for Boss Man to get over the top but Hogan is up again, this time with the superplex off the top of the cage, which is nowhere near as epic as the famous one on Saturday Night’s Main Event.

The big crash leaves both of them down for a good while until Hogan crawls over to the door. Boss Man gets the boot for the save and Hogan bites him on the head. A spinebuster cuts Hogan off again so Boss Man can choke with a rope. Back up and they ram each other into the cage for another double down. As you might have expected, Hogan gets up first and starts the big comeback, including some rams into the cage.

Boss Man is busted open and Hogan drops the leg so Slick decks the referee and comes inside. This goes as well as you would expect, with Hogan handcuffing Boss Man to the cage. Hogan climbs over as Slick gets the key in, beating him to the floor and hitting Boss Man with a chair as the referee gets up for the win at 11:15.

Rating: B-. It’s no surprise that these two work so well together as they did this match all over the place (including the same day in Boston). Boss Man was as natural of an opponent as Hogan could have had and that’s why he was this role so soon after coming over. It’s not as good as the famous one, but it still worked fine, especially for a house show match.

From Wrestlemania VII.

Before the match, Big Boss Man promises to take the Intercontinental Title from Mr. Perfect, but he’s also out for revenge for Bobby Heenan insulting Boss Man’s mother. The Heenan Family has been mowed down one by one, but now Perfect is the only one left. It’s time for revenge.

Heenan promises to give the people a free look at a law enforcement officer getting a beating. Perfect describes how perfect he happens to be and we’re ready to go.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect, with Heenan, is defending and Boss Man’s weight loss is remarkable. He’s probably lost about 80lbs since the cage match with Hogan, which was about two years earlier. That’s amazing and he looks FAR better here. Boss Man throws the towel back at Perfect to start and then spits at him before heading outside. Perfect gets punched around ringside and then thrown inside for another beating, including swinging him around BY THE HAIR (GEEZ).

A quick shot to the throat finally cuts Boss Man off and we hit the chinlock, with Perfect starting in on the back. The abdominal stretch goes on and Heenan is demanding the bell is rung. There has to be a Montreal joke there somewhere. Perfect hits a dropkick into the necksnap but the PerfectPlex is countered into a small package. Instead Perfect comes back with something close to a running Blockbuster (with Bossman’s legs almost getting bent backwards underneath him).

Perfect goes up but gets knocked out of the air, sending Heenan into panic mode. Boss Man crotches him against the post but Heenan offers a distraction, allowing Perfect to get in a ram into the steps. That’s a bit too far though and here is ANDRE THE GIANT (thankfully able to walk) to even things up. Andre picks up the title and wacks Perfect in the head, leaving both of them down. Boss Man slowly goes over…and the Heenan Family runs in for the DQ at 10:46.

Rating: C+. These guys had some rather nice chemistry together and it wound up working well, with both of them getting in some offense. It still doesn’t make a ton of sense to have Perfect retain the title here, as he could have gotten it back to drop it to Bret Hart at Summerslam. Either way, the match worked out well, with Boss Man doing some of his best work at this point.

Post match the brawl is on, with Andre helping Boss Man clean house. Andre leaves and Boss Man comes up from behind him and grabs him by the shoulder, with Andre looking like he’s ready to kill him. Everything is cool though.

From Summerslam 1991.

Big Boss Man vs. The Mountie

The loser spends the night in jail and Jimmy Hart is here with the Mountie. Boss Man slugs away to start and knocks Mountie down, only to have Mountie get away from the running crotch attack against the rope. Instead Hart offers a distraction, allowing Mountie to poke him in the eye. Mountie is pulled out of the air, which is rather impressive, and sets up a hard spinebuster. Hart offers another distraction so Mountie can get in a cheap shot to take over.

Back in and a jumping elbow to the back of the face drops Boss Man again. Boss Man misses a charge into the corner to make it even worse, followed by some elbows for a really lazy looking cover. A forearm to the chest knocks Boss Man off the apron and a piledriver gets two back inside. Mountie stands around for a long time until Hart gets up for the distraction. The shock stick doesn’t connect though and it’s a Boss Man Slam…for two? Well that isn’t something you see very often. Instead it’s one heck of an Alabama Slam to give Boss Man the pin at 9:37.

Rating: B-. The Alabama Slam alone was worth a look, as Boss Man laid him out with that thing. Other than that, it was one of the last big time Boss Man matches, even without much of a reason for doubt. Boss Man going to jail isn’t exactly a thing, while Mountie going to jail has quite the comedic potential. Which is what wound up happening.

Post match Mountie is sent into the police van and taken away….and we don’t see the rest, though this isn’t about him.

From Spring Stampede 1994 (and since we’re in WCW, he has a very original new name).

The Boss vs. Vader

Harley Race is here with Vader. The brawl starts on the ramp, with Race holding Boss but getting crushed by Vader by mistake. Boss knocks Vader over the rope and inside as the bell rings, meaning it’s time to strike away. A big boot and running right hand knock Vader back onto the ramp, where he hits a hard clothesline of his own. Vader throws him over the top and back inside, where a running splash (from the ramp and over the top) hits raised knees.

They go back outside with Vader being sent into the barricade and then then dropped onto it via quite the power display from Boss. Back in again and a rather easy looking slam drops Vader again but he gets back up. They slug it out and Vader gives him a backdrop over the top, with Boss barely getting the rope to help with the flip over. A splash crushes Boss back inside and Vader unloads in the corner.

Back up and Boss slugs away, including a running clothesline to the bleeding Vader. Boss gets run over again so Vader goes up, where Boss powerbombs him down for quite the impressive crash. A middle rope DDT gives Boss two so he goes up for a high crossbody of all things. That looked a bit weird and it makes sense as Boss goes up again but gets powerslammed off the top. The Vader Bomb only gets two so it’s a top rope moonsault to finish Boss at 9:04.

Rating: B+. This was one of Boss’s best matches ever, as he knew how to have a fight rather than wrestling. That’s exactly what it felt like here, as Boss was more than capable of hanging with Vader physically. There is very little in wrestling more entertaining than watching two big guys beating the living daylights out of each other until one of them falls and that’s what we got here. Awesome power brawl.

Post match Race loads up the handcuffs but Boss (or BOSS MAN according to Heenan) fight shim off and unloads on both of them with the nightstick.

From Fall Brawl 1994 and he’s now the Guardian Angel, which was a real group of citizen police. In other words, the WWF threatened to sue, which made sense in this case as THE BOSS might as well have been the exact same gimmick as he had in the WWF.

Guardian Angel vs. Vader vs. Sting

This is a triangle match (meaning two of them have a match and the winner faces the other man in a second match) for a future World Title match and Harley Race is here with Vader. They flip coins and Sting is the odd man out so it’s Vader vs. Angel, winner faces Sting immediately after. Angel gets in Sting’s face and tells him to stay out of this, with Sting agreeing but not liking the tone at all.

They shove each other a bit to start and then go to a test of strength, with Vader powering him down. Vader unloads on him in the corner but some running clotheslines give Angel a breather. The slam doesn’t work though and Vader is right back with the forearms in the corner. Guardian gets in a shot of his own and manages a rather impressive slam. An elbow between the legs sets up a less than successful slam attempt and Vader drops him face.

The chinlock goes on for a bit, only for Angel to fight up and hit a running crossbody for two. Another running charge sends Vader outside in a heap and Angel is back up. Vader decks Race by mistake and a slam gives Angel two back inside. The sliding uppercut underneath the ropes connects with Vader’s jaw but the referee gets bumped, meaning the Boss Man Slam gets no count. Race gets up and hits Angel, allowing the Vader Bomb to put him away at 7:07.

After a brief rest period, Sting comes out and we’re ready for the second round. Vader shoves him around to start and backs him into the corner, where Sting Hulks Up. That earns him the standing splash for the easy knockdown, followed by the Vader Bomb. Rather than covering, Vader tries it again but Sting cuts him off. Sting strikes away until a shot to the face drops him just as fast. Another Vader Bomb misses and Sting clotheslines him over the top. Sting suplexes Race on the floor and Vader back inside, followed by a splash…which hits raised knees.

The moonsault misses for Vader though and the fans are going nuts, despite Sting not doing much here. A superplex drops Vader again and the big elbow actually connects for Sting. The Samoan drop gives Sting two more and he German suplexes Vader down (that looked great) for two. Back up and Vader fires off the forearms, which trigger the Hulk Up. Sting drops him again with four minutes left and some top rope clotheslines have Vader in more trouble.

The top rope splash gets two with two minutes left and Vader is back up with a belly to back suplex. Vader goes up but dives into a powerslam, as tends to happen to him. Sting gets two off a clothesline and grabs the Scorpion but can’t get it all the way on as time expires at 25:56 total (15:00 of Sting vs. Vader).

Therefore it’s a five minute overtime and Vader kicks Sting down, followed by a hard suplex for two. Sting is sat on top but breaks up a superplex attempt with three minutes left. Vader crashes down but Sting is too banged up to do anything other than get down and weakly cover for two. This time it’s Vader going up and getting super backdropped down. Vader clotheslines him down for two more as we have a minute to go. A big splash gives Vader two more and he hits the powerbomb but takes too long to cover as time expires at 32:14.

So it’s now sudden death, meaning it’s the first person to be knocked down loses. Vader starts slugging away and Sting can barely stay up as he staggers to the ropes in a great visual. A big collapse into the corner isn’t enough for a knockdown and Vader is getting mad. Well madder. Sting fights back and knocks Vader against the ropes so Race gets on the apron. Cue the Guardian Angel to cut him off, with the referee following them. Sting drops the referee but a masked man (who has been causing issues as of late) runs in to deck Sting, allowing Vader to get up and win at 34:26.

Rating: B+. This is a weird one, as it’s literally two falls in one match with different wrestlers involved. The Angel vs. Vader stuff is decent, but Sting vs. Vader is the usual incredible showdown. It took some time to warm up but once they got going, it was a huge slugfest, with Sting staggering to stay on his feet being excellent stuff. If nothing else, this made Vader look like a killer, as he beat both guys back to back.

From Monday Night Raw, November 30, 1998.

Hardcore Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mankind

Mankind, with the JOB Squad, is defending in a ladder match and Commissioner Shawn Michaels is here with Boss Man. The Squad is chased off to start and Boss Man hits him in the head with the nightstick. Mankind is right back with a ladder to the head (Shawn gives it a minus two) and then drops the ladder onto Boss Man (Shawn gives it a one). They get inside and Mankind goes up but dives onto Boss Man rather than go for the belt.

An elbow to the ladder with Boss Man inside (good for a six) crushes him again and there’s a double arm DDT to keep him down. Boss Man cuts off the climb though and sends Mankind into the ladder in the corner. That’s good for a ten from Shawn but Mankind uses Socko to cut off a climb. Cue the Rock (in a shirt, trunks and tennis shoes for a weird look) to shove the ladder over and hit a Rock Bottom. Boss Man gets the title (his first in the WWF or WCW) at 6:20.

Rating: C. There’s a reason this time period is so well remembered, as there was so much going on. This match had interference, a ladder, Michaels’ running score gag, and the Rock in that weird get up. That’s quite a bit to cover in one match, which doesn’t even hit six and a half minutes. And it’s for the Hardcore Title. At least Boss Man finally got his hands on some gold, which was something he had earned over the years.

Post match the beatdown stays on for a bonus.

From Monday Night Raw, December 14, 1998.

Tag Team Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Big Boss Man/Ken Shamrock

Boss Man and Shamrock, with Shawn Michaels, are challenging. Boss Man shoulders Gunn down a few times to start so Gunn tells him to bring it. Some dropkicks clear the ring and even Dogg gets in one of his own. Back in and Boss Man gets in a shot to Gunn’s leg and take over. Shamrock knows how to go after a limb and takes the knee pad down to stay on the leg. Some elbows to the leg leave Gunn unable to run the ropes and Dogg comes in for a quick shot for a breather.

Shamrock tries a hurricanrana but gets countered into a sitout powerbomb. That’s enough for the tag off to Dogg but Michaels chairs him in the back. The Boss Man Slam is good for two so Gunn is back in, only to get distracted by Michaels. That earns Gunn a nightstick to the head and he’s out as the ankle lock goes on to make Shamrock and Boss Man (already the Intercontinental and Hardcore Champion) Tag Team Champions at 6:47.

Rating: C. This was another match where they packed in quite a bit of stuff, though thankfully not as bad as the previous one. At the same time, I’m really not sure that a mega stable like the Corporation needed two double champions. There were no other wrestlers who could have taken those titles? Either way, at least Shamrock seemed thrilled with the title win, as you should.

Overall Rating: B-. For lack of a better term, Boss Man was good at being a boss for someone to fight. It made his matches with people like Hogan or Vader work so well, as Boss Man had the size to match up with them, but he could also be a big power guy against more normal sized opposition. He had a sneaky good collection of matches as well, as once he slimmed down and figured out his style, it was working far better. This was a lot of fun and I can see why I was a fan of his for such a long time.

 

 

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Superstars
Date: August 24, 1991
Location: Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper, Randy Savage

It’s the last show before Summerslam 1991 and that means it’s time for the final push towards the show. That means we’ll be looking at the main event of Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan, plus Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Commentary hypes up Summerslam.

We run down the card for this week’s show.

The Dragon vs. Jim McPherson

Believe it or not, Steamboat chops away to start but McPherson gets in a shot of his own. Steamboat’s top rope chop sets up the high crossbody for the pin at 1:30.

Gene Okerlund has an UPDATE, which is….a recap of Jake Roberts sending Ultimate Warrior into a special room, where a snake bit Warrior in the face. Roberts was very pleased with Warrior being poisoned and seemingly left him to die. This brought in Undertaker and Paul Bearer, who were working with Roberts in quite the twist. That was Roberts’ heel turn, as Warrior wanted Roberts’ help against the Undertaker but then Roberts turned on him. It worked rather well.

Roberts talks about how snakes have to turn on people, like a snake that ate a rabbit one time.

Okerlund is disgusted, but sweet goodness Roberts is selling the heck out of this turn.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Bill Pierce

Slaughter strikes away and it’s off to an insert promo from Slaughter and company, promising to destroy Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior. A gutbuster and backdrop have Pierce down again, setting up a top rope double stomp to the back (GEEZ SARGE!). The camel clutch finishes at 2:38.

Buy the bodybuilding magazine! Sweet goodness I can’t escape that stupid stuff.

Koko B. Ware vs. Dick Wernick

Ware armdrags him down to start and claps a lot as commentary talks about anything else. The Ghostbuster finishes for Ware at 1:27.

Sean Mooney is in the Event Center and tells us about some of the non-main event. British Bulldog, the Dragon and Texas Tornado are ready for the Warlord and Power & Glory. Tornado: “At Summerslam.” Bulldog: “91!”

The Mountie is ready to lock the Big Boss Man in the jailhouse.

IRS vs. ???

IRS clotheslines him down to start and grabs the abdominal stretch. Greg Valentine, facing IRS at Summerslam, promises to prove there is no escape from his Figure Four. A Samoan drop finishes for IRS at 2:00.

Here is Sid Justice for a platform interview. He’s ready to call the main event down the line, with Gene Okerlund asking how he can possibly be impartial. Sid doesn’t like that and promises that justice will be served.

Bobby Heenan holds up the big gold belt and says it’s making Hulk Hogan’s knees shake. The owner of this belt may be coming to the WWF and his name is Ric Flair. It’s not the initial announcement, but this stuff is still incredible to imagine, as it was worlds colliding.

Natural Disasters vs. Ray Garcia/Ross Greenberg

Jimmy Hart is here with the Disasters. Garcia gets taken into the wrong corner as we get an insert promo from the Bushwhackers and Andre The Giant, the latter of whom looks about 4000 years old and threatens the Disasters with his crutch. A double shoulder sets up a powerslam into the Earthquake for the win at 2:13.

Bret Hart is ready to win the Intercontinental Title and threatens to execute Mr. Perfect. Dude have you thought about just trying to pin him?

Mr. Perfect, with the Coach (a terrible fit for Perfect), is ready for what might be the best match this company has ever seen. It might not have been that great, but it did wind up being pretty awesome.

Gene Okerlund hypes up Summerslam and focuses on the Tag Team Title match, with the Nasty Boys threatening to get rid of the Legion Of Doom. The Legion Of Doom says they own Nastyville.

The Mountie tours the jailhouse in New York City and gets some nice photos taken. The Boss Man promises to have Mountie locked up. Advantage, Mountie.

Bret Hart vs. ???

Hart shoulders him down to start and we get an insert promo from Mr. Perfect, who is ready. Hart goes into his usual stuff and finishes with the Sharpshooter at 2:25. Total squash.

IRS is ready to face Greg Valentine and is almost as happy as he is for tax day.

The Natural Disasters are ready to squash the Bushwhackers. That might be literal.

Commentary wraps us up.

Overall Rating: C+. Considering this was hyping up a show I’ve seen a ton of times, they did quite the job of making me want to see it again. This was nothing more than an hour long commercial and they actually did quite the good job. Summerslam wasn’t even that great of a show, but they absolutely went all out to make me want to see the show again, which is quite the effect. Good enough stuff here, and as usual it just flies by.

 

 

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Summerslam 1991
Date: August 26, 1991
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Roddy Piper, Gorilla Monsoon

This is a show that almost no one remembers other than one match. The main event is Hogan/Warrior vs. Slaughter/Adnan/Mustafa, which would have been a much better match a few months ago when Slaughter was still a threat. Other than that we have the wedding of Savage and Miss Elizabeth who reunited at Wrestlemania VII in one of the best moments in company history. Let’s get to it.

We open with Savage in the back getting ready while Alfred Hayes asks him questions. Savage says that he’s ready and in the danger zone, but HAYES’ TIE IS CROOKED. “NOW YOU’RE OK AND IT’S TIME TO GO CHECK MY BABY BLUE EYES!”

We get the regular intro with the theme of a match made in Heaven and a match made in Hell.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Ssteamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Sean Mooney says to call some hotline to hear prerecorded comments from Liz and Savage!

Mr. Perfect says he’s an awesome champion.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart

Perfect has been champion since last November so he’s a pretty big deal. He also has his Coach (former wrestler John Tolos) with him. Stu and Helen Hart are in the audience to watch their son. Feeling out process to start with Bret scoring first by hip tossing Perfect to the floor. Back in and Bret grabs a headlock followed by a crucifix for two. Bret puts the headlock on again as Heenan and Piper are going to war on commentary. Gorilla: “WILL YOU STOP???”

Perfect grabs at the hair to escape and chops Bret’s chest off. A slam puts Bret down but he kicks Perfect away and slams him down, only to have Perfect kick him right back. Bret is all like screw this wrestling stuff and clotheslines Perfect to the floor. The champ tries to run but Bret throws him back in and the dude in pink is mad. Perfect gets in a HARD kick to the ribs and Bret is sent to the floor where Coach whistles at him.

Bret tries to get up but is knocked off the apron and right on top of a production guy who has a very confused look on his face. Back in and Bret jumps over Perfect in the corner and gets two off a rollup. The fans are WAY into this so far. Perfect sends Bret chest first into the buckle to take over again as Heenan is starting to lose his marbles. Another hard whip into the buckle gets two for the champion followed by the Hennig neck snap for two more.

Hart is sent to the floor for a bit and they both come back in on the top. It’s Bret crashing down to the mat to give Perfect two as Heenan is thinking Perfect should get himself disqualified. The champ hooks a sleeper but Bret fights up into a crucifix, only to be dropped down into a Samoan drop for two. The PerfectPlex looks to finish Bret but it only gets two, sending MSG into delirium.

Back up and Bret fights back, sending Perfect across the ring and crotch first into the post. A suplex and small package get two each for Bret and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. Bret yells at the referee and gets rolled up for two before Bret starts going after the knee. He loads up the Sharpshooter but he has to knock Coach to the floor. The distraction lets Perfect get in a shot to take over. Perfect drops a leg between Bret’s legs but as he tries it again, Bret grabs the leg and puts the Sharpshooter on from his back. He turns the hold over and Perfect submits really fast but it’s good for Bret’s first singles title.

Rating: A. Oh come on it’s Bret vs. Perfect from Summerslam 91. Do I really need to explain this one? It’s one of the best matches of all time and holds up over twenty years later. The counter by Bret is a great way to show how solid of a mat wrestler he was. Kicking out of the PerfectPlex was the perfect idea as Bret took the champ’s best shots and still won. It’s still excellent and required viewing for wrestling fans.

Bret celebrates with his parents.

The Bushwhackers are ready for the Natural Disasters and Andre is ready for Earthquake, the man who broke his leg a few weeks back.

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Andre looks terrible here and would be dead in less than 18 months. The Whackers sneak up on the big men on the floor and poke them in the eyes. We finally start with Butch vs. Typhoon and the big man being bitten on the trunks. Earthquake tries to come in but splashes his own partner by mistake. A double clothesline puts Quake down and the Bushwhackers are in full control.

Earthquake finally realizes he weighs more than both Bushwhackers put together and pounds Butch down with a few shots to the back. Heenan makes an obscure Newhart reference as Quake slams Butch into the corner but misses an elbow drop to the back. The second attempt connects though and it’s off to Typhoon for more fat man offense.

Off to an over the shoulder backbreaker on Butch which transitions into a bearhug by Earthquake. Heenan leaves to go find Hogan and embarrass him which we’ll get to later. Quake finally hits Typhoon with a clothesline by mistake as everything breaks down. The Bushwhackers hit Battering Rams on both Disasters but it’s finally the big men crushing Luke and the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was a waste of time and everyone knew it was going to be from the moment the bell rang. The Bushwhackers were the epitome of comedy bumpkins and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m not sure why they picked them of all teams for Andre to back and the match was horrible.

Post match the Disasters go after Andre but the LOD comes out for the save. This was Andre’s last appearance for the company.

Heenan goes to Hogan’s dressing room with the NWA World Title to issue a challenge. “Hogan” (you never see him) opens the door and slams it in Heenan’s face. For the life of me I can’t get over seeing that belt in the WWF.

Virgil recaps his feud with DiBiase. You’re probably familiar with this one: Virgil was his bodyguard for years but at the Rumble, DiBiase pushed him just once too often and Virgil snapped. DiBiase lost to Virgil via countout at Wrestlemania and tonight it’s a rematch with the Million Dollar Title on the line.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

This is one of the very rare defenses of this title. DiBiase has Sensational Sherri with him. Piper is Virgil’s mentor so the commentary is going to be rather slanted. Virgil starts fast and hits three straight clotheslines to send DiBiase out to the floor. Heenan is back on commentary but doesn’t want to talk about Hogan. Virgil misses a dive to the floor and DiBiase sends him into the steps to keep him down. Back inside and Ted is in full control but he brags too much and gets caught in the Million Dollar Dream. The fans go nuts but Sherri comes in and blasts Virgil with her loaded purse for the DQ.

Rating: D. Actually hang on a minute.

The referee says the match MUST continue, sending Sherri to the back and Roddy into delirium. Virgil pounds on DiBiase in the corner but since he doesn’t have much experience he can’t do anything. He tries to whip DiBiase across the ring but gets countered into a ref bump to put both guys down. Ted yells at Piper like the true heel that he is before suplexing Virgil down. A piledriver lays Virgil out but sicne there’s no referee, DiBiase rips the turnbuckle off instead. Ted yells at Piper once too often though, allowing Virgil to ram him into the buckle twice for the pin and the title. Piper goes NUTS.

Rating: D+. This is a good example of a match where the crowd and announcing make it much better than it would have been otherwise. Virgil just wasn’t that good and this was his one and only storyline with the company due to there being nothing else to his character. How the guy kept a job for so many years with both WWF and WCW is beyond me.

The Mountie is ready for his Jailhouse Match with Boss Man. We get a clip of him shocking a handcuffed Boss Man from a few weeks ago. Moutnie insults the New York cops who take the loser to jail later tonight.

Boss Man says Mountie is going to jail tonight.

Mountie vs. Big Boss Man

Mountie talks trash to start so Boss Man punches him in the mouth to take over. They slug it out with Boss Man hitting a back elbow and a splash for two. Boss Man hits his running crotch attack to the back of Mountie’s neck followed by the sliding uppercut. Mountie dives into a good looking spinebuster for two but Boss Man chases Jimmy Hart instead of following up, earning him a trip into the steps.

Back in and Boss Man misses a splash in the corner as Heenan says it’s not Mayberry for the Boss Man tonight. Mountie gets two each off some elbows and a dropkick but the kickout sends him to the floor. He pulls Boss Man to the floor as Gorilla calls Jimmy a walking advertisement for birth control. Back in and they slug it out with Mountie hitting a piledriver for no cover. Instead Mountie gets his shock stick but only hits the mat. A hard uppercut sets up the Boss Man Slam for two (I don’t remember anyone not named Hogan kicking out of that) before another piledriver attempt is countered into an Alabama Slam to end Mountie.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen far worse and Boss Man’s high impact offense is always worth a look. This is the perfect blowoff to the feud which is something you rarely see anymore. Today feuds just keep going with some random gimmick match which may or may not fit the feud. This was the logical ending to it and it was tailor made for the blowoff. Why thy don’t do this anymore is beyond me.

Mountie is dragged away by cops.

DiBiase goes on a huge rant about the title, saying that Virgil stole it and he’ll get it back.

Bret says this is the best day of his career and he waited a long time to prove how great he is. I’m pretty sure we’re in intermission.

The Natural Disasters are going to eat the Legion of Doom for dinner.

Boss Man asks Sean Mooney what kind of bird can’t fly. A jailbird of course. He brags about winning a bit more.

Savage is nervous for the wedding.

Speaking of the wedding, here’s the phone number again, complete with a countdown clock for a five minute intermission. Seriously they just count down five minutes of dead air time. AND THIS WAS ON THE HOME VIDEO.

Mountie arrives at the jail and shouts that the cops can’t do this to him because HE’S THE MOUNTIE! He tries to read the cops their rights and gets thrown in a cell.

Jimmy Hart is panicking while his Nasty Boys are read for the LOD. It’s a street fight later tonight.

Mountie is tricked into having his picture taken.

The Legion of Doom wants the tag titles. Hawk says once they win the belts they’re going to chew up the Natural Disasters and spit them out “like the tartar that sticks to your teeth.”

Mountie yells about having being fingerprinted. These bits are so overblown that they’re hilarious.

Sgt. Slaughter and his cronies are excited about having a 3-2 advantage. Slaughter says he might have a surprise for later.

Sid Justice, the referee for the main event tonight, says that he’ll call it down the middle. Gene shows us a video of Slaughter and company offering Sid a spot on the team but Sid says they stopped him but he turned them down.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Legion of Doom

The Nasties are defending and this is No Countout/No DQ, making it a street fight in modern terms. The champions are sent to the floor and the fight is on early. Back in the ring Animal hits a quick powerbomb on Knobbs for two followed by Hawk enziguring Sags down. We get down to the stupid tagging part of the street fight with Sags sending Hawk to the floor and hitting him with a bucket of water.

Back in and Knobbs works over Hawk in the corner before Sags sends him into the steps. A back elbow gets two for Knobbs and a top rope version gets the same for Sags. Brian goes up top again but jumps into Hawk’s boot, finally allowing for the hot tag off to Animal. Everything breaks down and Sags hits Animal in the back with Jimmy’s helmet for two. Hawk steals the helmet and lays out both Nasties, setting up the Doomsday Device on Sags for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This SUCKED as the street fight rule was barely used at all. It was little more than a few shots with the helmet when the referee wasn’t looking anyway. Hawk and Animal barely broke a sweat out there as they were already talking about the Natural Disasters earlier tonight instead of worrying about winning the belts. This win was a long time coming though.

The Mountie is put in a cell by some VERY sweaty policemen.

I.R.S. vs. Greg Valentine

Uh…..sure. Feeling out process to start so Gorilla recaps the show so far. Valentine takes over with a quick shoulder block and a clothesline. Somehow we’re nearly two minutes into the match with this much action. IRS rolls to the floor as Gorilla says Undertaker and Jake Roberts might be here. Back in and Valentine slams him down, sending IRS right back to the floor.

The tax guy heads in again and puts on an abdominal stretch followed by a jumping clothesline for no cover. Off to a chinlock before IRS misses a knee into the corner, giving Greg the opening on the leg. The Figure Four is quickly broken by a grab of the ropes and a second attempt at the hold is countered into a small package for the pin by IRS.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that bad but it had no business being on a pay per view. This would be the equivalent of the Divas match on a modern show to give the fans a breather between the big matches. Valentine was long past his point of being a star but he could still put people over like he did here.

Buy Hulk Hogan’s PPV, which is a Best of Hogan show. I’ve heard of worse ideas.

Hogan and Warrior talk about their victims in the main event.

Ultimate Warrior/Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Sid Justice is guest referee and Hogan is WWF Champion. Hogan and Slaughter get things going but the Sarge wants to stall. Slaughter pounds on him in the corner but gets caught between the right hands of both superheroes. Off to Warrior for a clothesline followed by a double big boot to put Slaughter down again. A clothesline gets two for Hogan and it’s back to Warrior. This is completely one sided so far. Hogan comes back in with a middle rope ax handle for two.

Sid breaks up some choking in the corner and the distraction lets Slaughter get in some shots on Hogan. Adnan, an old manager, comes in to rake Hogan’s back and slowly pound away in the corner. Off to Mustafa (Iron Sheik) for the gutwrench suplex and the camel clutch but Warrior makes the save. Slaughter comes back in to choke away in the corner and send Hogan into Sid for a staredown. Sarge jumps the distracted Hogan and stomps away on the back.

Warrior breaks up a top rope something by Slaughter, allowing for the hot tag to the painted one. Warrior cleans house on Slaughter but runs into Sid for another staredown. Back to Mustafa who gets caught in a suplex but Slaughter blocks a tag. Slaughter puts Warrior in a chinlock, only to have the Ultimate One fight up and clothesline Sarge down. There’s the hot tag to Hogan as Hogan chases the lackeys to the back with a chair. More on that later as Hogan throws powder in Slaughter’s face and drops the leg to win.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of this one as the match was never in doubt at all, but above that the Iraq War had been over for six months so the interest in the feud was done long ago. Nothing to see here but the fans reacted pretty well to it. This would have been better as a house show main event instead of the main event of Summerslam. If nothing else there was a match around this time on a Coliseum Video with Slaughter/Mustafa/Undertaker against the superheroes. Wouldn’t that make a much better main event here?

Hogan and Sid pose for a long time post match.

Mountie is in jail and a fat biker hits on him.

Hogan and Sid are STILL posing.

We get the video of Savage proposing to Liz and her responding with an OH YEAH. We also get a four minute music video highlighting their entire history together to a sappy love song.

The ring is set up like a chapel for the wedding. Savage comes out in a shiny tux with a big feather on his hat. Heenan: “Why is the second most important guy called the best man?” From what I’ve read this is a legit renewal of vows as the two were already married in real life. There isn’t much to say here other than it’s a wedding and no one interrupts it. This takes like ten minutes.

With the show in the arena done we go to the reception with Savage telling Heenan to beat it. Gene Okerlund does the ceremonial toast. They have the first dance and everything seems to be fine. Now we eat cake before heading over to the gift table where things get interesting.

First off, “WE GOT A BLENDER!!!” Savage freaks out as only he can as you would think he just got the WWF Title instead of a blender. Liz goes to open a present…..and there’s a cobra inside. She freaks out and Savage tries to pull her back, but Undertaker comes in and bashes him in the head with the urn. Jake Roberts comes in and holds the cobra in front of Liz’s face until Sid makes the save with a chair to end the show. This would set up Roberts vs. Savage in the feud of the year which resulted in Undertaker’s face turn.

Overall Rating: C-. This is an interesting show in that the first half is a much higher quality than the second half. The second half has all predictable matches where the winners were never in doubt, but that doesn’t exactly make it terrible. The show is definitely entertaining and set up a lot of stuff down the road while launching Bret Hart up to the next level. It’s worth a watch if you can find it in full but I wouldn’t expect to be blown away.

Ratings Comparison

British Bulldog/Ricky Steamboat/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Original: D

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: A+

Redo: A

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: D+

Big Bossman vs. The Mountie

Original: D

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Nasty Boys

Original: D

Redo: D

Irwin R. Schyster vs. Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dang this show ticked me off the first time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/25/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1991-a-wedding-that-goes-badly-what-a-new-concept/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Superstars
Date: June 13, 1992
Location: Rupp Arena, Lexington, Kentucky
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect

We’re off to the start of a new taping cycle here and that means…well very little but it’s still nice to see these things being released on occasion. They’re such an easy watch and that makes for some fun flashbacks. The big story continues to be Papa Shango cursing the Ultimate Warrior and the blowoff has to be coming soon. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

The hosts welcome us to the show with a bunch of horse puns before talking about the WBF Championships, because that’s still a thing.

We run down the card.

Tatanka vs. Barry Horowitz

Horowitz hammers away to start but Tatanka is back with some leapfrogs (and barely seems to get the landing on one of them). A hiptoss doesn’t do much to Horowitz, who sends Tatanka face first into his boot. Tatanka hits a not exactly smooth gorilla press and we get a Rick Martel insert promo, mocking Tatanka over the stolen feathers. Tatanka fights back, hits the top rope chop to the head, and finishes with the Papoose To Go at 2:24.

UPDATE!

We recap Ultimate Warrior’s issues due to Papa Shango’s curse. Then last week Shango blew smoke at Gene Okerlund and left him unable to use his right hand, which started spurting out more black goo. Okerlund does sell it rather well, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

The Warrior is willing to sacrifice his flesh so he can walk only as a skeleton. If he stands only as a skeleton, it is still as the skeleton as the Ultimate Warrior. I’m sure that’s answering a challenge. I guess.

Shawn Michaels vs. Graig Brown

Sherri is here with Michaels, who takes Brown down a few times. We get an insert interview from Michaels/Sherri, where he talks about how hard it must be to go through life being as ugly as Bret Hart. He’ll take that Intercontinental Title from Hart though. A ram into the buckle annoys Michaels so he rolls outside for a quick check in the mirror. Back in and the superkick into the teardrop suplex finishes Brown at 1:41. Naturally Michaels uses this as a chance to talk about the WBF. Let it go already man.

We go to the Event Center with Sean Mooney.

Repo Man doesn’t like dogs ruining his business and suggests a choke collar. That’s what he wants to do to the British Bulldog.

Texas Tornado has rededicated a lot of things, including his life, his friends and to Jesus, because he is doing it for you. You could hear him slurring his words a bit here, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

We go to the streets of Miami, where Razor Ramon talks about how he comes from the gutter. He has no education, but who needs it? Look at his gold and his clothes. Of course he is a success, and all he wants is the world.

Natural Disasters vs. Executioners

The Executioners (generic masked guys) charge at the Disasters to start and try some slams, earning themselves a pair of backbreakers. Typhoon splashes #1 in the corner and then throws him down, followed by some slow stomping. Earthquake comes in for the double splash in the corner and for some reason #2 tries a double clothesline (Perfect finds this amazingly stupid). The powerslam into the Earthquake into the Typhoon splash (ignore that Typhoon was already in the ring when he was tagged) finishes at 2:57.

Back to the Event Center, with Skinner talking about how he likes it nice and hot in the summer. Virgil and Crush (“Or Crunch, whatever his name is.”) are coming at him from different sides but he has all the time in the world. If he can beat up a bear or an alligator, he can beat up a WWF Superstar.

Paul Bearer and Undertaker warn Berzerker and Mr. Fuji against coming to the dark side.

The Mountie vs. Bill Koby

Vince’s “Oh no not him again” when Mountie comes out is great. Mountie takes his time to start before tying him up in the Tree of Woe for some stomping. We get an insert promo from Sgt. Slaughter talking about the importance of Flag Day. Mountie finishes with a dropkick at 1:27.

Post match the Mountie gets his shock stick out of the box and threatens Koby, who runs away just in time.

Ad for the WBF PPV.

We get an empty arena interview with Randy Savage, who will be defending the WWF Title later. There are allegations that he had to bend the rules to win the title, which makes Savage whistle. Yes he has bent the rules a time or two but he reserves the right to do it again in the future. He’s fine with wrestling scientifically but if he knows he’s going against a dirty player, he’s not going to be naive.

Savage isn’t going to forget anything Ric Flair has said or done and he’ll take it to the grave. He’s bad to the bone with a heart made of stone and he’s the WWF Champion and Ric Flair is not. Of course he’ll break the rules if it means beating Flair. It’s weird to hear a clear good guy talk like that, but it fits Savage perfectly well.

Kamala vs. Dale Wolfe

Harvey Wippleman handles Kamala’s introduction. Kamala chops away on the ropes to start and stomps him down, followed by a variety of choking. Commentary goes silent for a few moments before the splash finishes for Kamala at 1:24.

El Matador vs. Mike Samples

Of note: during Matador’s entrance, a man with a mustache and wearing a blue shirt can be seen holding up a four year old, who got a high five from Matador himself (no wonder I’ve always been a fan). Commentary finally stops talking about the WBF before going to an insert promo from Matador….so he can talk about the WBF. Matador takes him down by the arm and finishes with El Paso de la Muerte at 1:26.

Mr. Perfect calls the Big Boss Man and we see shots of all of the bruises and injuries the Boss Man sustained at the hands of Nailz. Perfect is glad that Boss Man’s career is over but Boss Man says he’ll be back, which makes Perfect hang up.

Nailz vs. Ron Cumberledge

For some reason, Nailz is one of the only things I remember about this show (likely due to being terrified of him). Nailz chokes away in the corner and kicks him in the ribs. A standing choke finishes Cumberledge at 1:07.

Post match Nailz beats him down with a nightstick.

Papa Shango talks about pain and how he’s hurting the Ultimate Warrior. The Warrior will become his mindless, thankless troll. How could you tell?

The Legion Of Doom are ready for every team around because they are the only great team around.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Shawn Michaels has left the building. McMahon: “What?”

Overall Rating: C-. This was a fairly weak show even by Superstars standards, but at the same time, there was some great nostalgia in here. It’s a show I haven’t seen since it aired live (or even being there in person) and it’s from a period that the WWF doesn’t talk about very often. The fact that McMahon and Perfect talked about the WBF so much rather than the show itself shows you just where the WWF was at this point.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s the Gulf War show, as Hulk Hogan is fighting to get the WWF Title back from former American hero turned Iraqi sympathizer Sgt. Slaughter. If that sounds like one of the worst ideas for a Wrestlemania main event ever, you have quite the memory for these things. Other than that we have Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior in a match that actually belongs in a big spot at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about the stars and stripes with only Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter being shown.

Willie Nelson sings America The Beautiful.

Jim Duggan joins commentary for the first match, while saying that Hulk Hogan going after Sgt. Slaughter is like the military going after Saddam Hussein.

The Rockers know they’re ready for Haku and the Barbarian, whether they are part of the Heenan Family or not.

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Haku and Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, are already in the ring in a move that could cut down on so much Wrestlemania time these days. Shawn and Haku start things off as the fans are already yelling about Heenan. Haku whips him into the corner a few times but a shoulder and some right hands get Shawn out of trouble. Marty comes in for the double elbow but Barbarian clotheslines both Rockers inside out.

Back up and a double superkick drops Barbarian and it’s time for pointers with the Brain (jot that down for a talk show idea). We settle back down to Marty sunset flipping Barbarian for two before working over the arm. Haku comes back in for a double headbutt and an assisted hot shot has Marty in even more trouble. The gorilla press plants Marty again and Barbarian even draws Shawn in so double choking can ensue.

A hard whip into the corner gives Barbarian two more and we hit the required bearhug (What took them so long?). Marty tries to fight back but gets caught in a heck of a powerslam to cut him off again. Barbarian misses the top rope headbutt though and there’s the tag to Shawn. House is quickly cleaned, including a middle rope crossbody to Barbarian. Everything breaks down and it’s a double clothesline to Barbarian. Marty missile Barbarian and Shawn adds a high crossbody for the pin at 10:33.

Rating: C+. The middle felt a little bit long but this was a perfectly fine power vs. speed tag match. The Rockers are one of the better speed teams from around this time and they were a great choice for an opener. Haku and Barbarian on the other hand were perfectly acceptable monsters, making this a rather nice way to get the crowd fired up. It would have been a heck of a house show match (and probably was more than once) and that worked well in this spot.

We get our celebrity interviews with Regis Philbin (scared of Earthquake), Marla Maples (future wife of Donald Trump and tonight’s guest timekeeper) and Alex Trebek (Jeopardy jokes abound). I love Jeopardy and Regis can be funny, but these are about as cringe as you can get.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Jimmy Hart is here with Bravo, who jumps Tornado at the bell and clotheslines him out to the floor in an early heap. Back in and Tornado slugs away but can’t get the Claw. Bravo knocks him down again and drops an elbow for two, setting up the side slam. The delayed cover gets two and there’s a middle rope elbow to the back of Tornado’s head. Bravo goes up but dives into the Claw, setting up the Tornado Punch for the pin at 3:11.

Rating: D. This is the match that I cite for why I don’t redo every Wrestlemania (or any show) very often. There are only so many ways you can talk about a nothing match like this with no build and almost no time. Tornado was past his expiration date and Bravo would be gone, save for mostly house shows, after this, so what were they supposed to do here?

Slick and the Warlord are ready to beat British Bulldog. Sweet goodness I was scared of Warlord’s half mask back then and it’s still an awesome look to this day.

Bulldog says he can powerslam Warlord.

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Slick is here with Warlord but Bulldog has his mascot Winston (he’s no Matilda). This is power vs. power so Warlord starts with the clubbing forearm to the back. Bulldog runs him over with some shoulders and Warlord is already on the floor for a breather. Back in and Warlord counters the crucifix into something like a Samoan drop as things slow way back down. The bearhug goes on for a bit before Bulldog charges into a hot shot to cut the comeback right back off.

We hit the chinlock, with Heenan even complaining about how sloppy Warlord has it on. With that broken up, Bulldog dropkicks him into the corner and hammers away, setting up a crossbody for two. The piledriver is blocked so Bulldog settles for two off a sunset flip instead. Bulldog misses a charge though and Warlord gets most of the full nelson, minus the fingers being locked. The incomplete version is broken up and Bulldog hits the powerslam for the pin at 8:10.

Rating: C. This was another house show style match as Bulldog gets an impressive win, with that powerslam still looking great. Warlord is up there with the most generic monster villains you can get but he looked good enough that beating him still felt like something of a big deal. These two could have some nice power matches though and they made a basic story work well here.

The Nasty Boys, with Jimmy Hart, are ready to win the Tag Team Titles, even if it means beating the Hart Foundation. They destroy Gene handkerchief to warm up.

The Hart Foundation are ready for a fight but say the Nastys can’t crack, move or break the foundation.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Nastys, with Jimmy Hart (in a helmet), are challenging and Macaulay Culkin is in the audience, with Monsoon thankfully recognizing him. Sags punches away at Bret to start but Bret is back with a Thesz press and right hands (….hey). Bret cuts off a kick to the ribs and stomps Sags in the abdomen (or bread basket, whichever you prefer). Knobbs comes in to hammer on Neidhart in the corner, which of course is just fine with Neidhart.

The hard shoulders send Knobbs to the floor before it’s time to work on the arm back inside. It’s back to Sags, who gets taken down again by Neidhart, allowing Bret to hammer away as well. The Russian legsweep into the middle rope elbow connects but Bret has to cut off an interfering Knobbs. That’s enough for Sags to get in a cheap shot so the Nastys can actually take over for a change.

Bret is knocked to the floor for a breather, followed by a hard whip into the corner back inside as the pace stays slow. The reverse chinlock goes on for a good while before Knobbs comes in for one of his own. Sags grabs a third reverse chinlock, followed by Knobbs dropping elbows to the bad back.

Make that four reverse chinlocks until Bret finally avoids a charge in the corner. The tag to Neidhart isn’t seen but Knobbs runs into Sags by mistake, allowing Neidhart to come in legally. House is cleaned and a powerslam gets two on Knobbs. The Nastys collide again and the Hart Attack hits Knobbs. There’s no referee though, allowing Sags to get in a shot with Jimmy’s helmet to give Knobbs the pin and the titles at 12:00.

Rating: C. There were good sections, but how in the world can four straight reverse chinlocks be the best you have? Mixing it up at least a little big really shouldn’t be too much to ask but apparently that wasn’t going to happen here. This was a way to get some fresh blood in the tag division, which would be needed as the Harts were more or less done after this, with Bret moving into his singles career.

We recap Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts. Martel went to spray Jake’s snake bag with cologne (because reasons) but sprayed Jake in the eyes. Roberts was blinded as a result, though he managed to DDT Brother Love at one point. His eyes were messed up for months but now he’s back for a blindfold match.

Roberts says snakes have five senses but they always do it better in the dark.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

They’re both in hoods and if you ignore being able to see the eye hole when Jake puts his on, it makes for a good visual. Roberts goes smart early on by having the crowd help him find Martel. There’s no contact for the first minute until both of them stumble over the other a bit. Jake gets two off a rollup and then steps around Martel’s backdrop attempt (because that’s the kind of thing you do when you can’t see).

The pointing thing results in a collision and a pair of missed charges. Then to mix it up a bit, they miss each other again. Martel finally catches him with a slam but misses the elbow drop as Gorilla and Bobby suddenly can’t hear each other. Martel corners the referee in the corner as Jake is in another corner to start the pointing. With that not working, Jake starts clapping to get Martel to come over. This one actually works, but they crash into the ropes. Heenan: “Why doesn’t Martel lift the hood up and peak?” Gorilla: “That’s cheating!” Heenan: “SO WHAT???”

A headlock doesn’t work for Jake as Martel sends him outside. Heenan: “Excuse me. MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR!” Martel follows him out and pokes around with a chair, with the swing only hitting the post. Back in and Martel hits a backbreaker to set up the Boston crab. With that broken up in a hurry (so much for Martel’s finisher), Jake grabs the DDT for the pin at 8:31.

Rating: D. This match isn’t something that works well on second viewings, as there are so many instances where it is clear that they can see each other. Roberts getting the win is the feel good moment, but it took its sweet time getting there. Not as completely horrible as I remember it, but it doesn’t work very well if you’re paying attention.

Post match Jake busts up the Arrogance atomizer and puts Damien on Martel.

Marla Maples is in the locker room where the Nasty Boys, Jimmy Hart and the Mountie are celebrating the Tag Team Title win. Dino Bravo and Earthquake come in with more champagne and Marla is surrounded. That’s it for her, as this isn’t exactly a great celebrity cameo. What exactly was nasty about a big celebration anyway?

Jimmy Snuka vs. The Undertaker

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker of course. Snuka stares at Undertaker as we cut to Bearer looking….well weird to everyone else, normal for him. Undertaker sends him into the corner a few times before knocking Snuka outside in a heap. A suplex brings Snuka back in but he manages a few strikes for a breather. Snuka’s missed charge only hits ropes though and it’s another crash to the floor, followed by the Tombstone to make Undertaker 1-0 at Wrestlemania at 4:20.

Rating: D+. It’s always kind of interesting that one of the most important things in the company’s history started off as such a nothing match. This was little more than a squash as Snuka had absolutely nothing. The Tombstone alone was worth a look, though Undertaker was still figuring a lot of things out at this point.

We recap Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior in a career threatening match. Savage wanted a shot at Warrior’s WWF Title but got turned down (despite Sherri’s suggestive advances). As a result, Savage cheated like crazy to cost Warrior the title to Sgt. Slaughter. Warrior wants revenge, and their careers are on the line. This is FAR more interesting than the real main event as it has a more personal story and could go either way.

Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior

Before the match, Heenan spots Miss Elizabeth in the crowd, looking a bit distraught. Savage, with Queen Sherri, gets his big throne entrance and Warrior makes it weird by walking to the ring. They take their time to get going until Warrior powers him away. Savage bounces off of him and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Back in and Warrior chokes away before hitting an atomic drop, though things are still moving fairly slowly.

Sherri’s interference fails and Warrior punches Savage down again. Savage finally comes back with that running clothesline but Warrior pulls a high crossbody out of the air (that’s always impressive). Instead of slamming Savage down though, Warrior sits him down to start up the mind games. Said games cause Savage to throw in a chair but Warrior punches him down again. Warrior finally misses a charge into the corner though and Sherri stomps away on the floor.

Savage’s top rope ax handle has a bit more impact but Warrior shoves Sherri down anyway. A posting drops Warrior and Sherri, not taking this lying down, kicks away at Warrior. As Gorilla says this is officially the largest pay per view audience in the history of pay per view, Warrior gets two off a backslide for a breather. Warrior hits the clothesline and runs the ropes a bunch, only to miss the shoulder.

Savage grabs the chinlock for a bit before Warrior fights up. A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown and they’re both rather winded. Back up and Warrior actually grabs a small package but Sherri has the referee. Savage knees Warrior in the back to send him into the referee and now things are getting going. Sherri comes in off the top with her shoe but hits Savage by mistake, meaning it’s time for Warrior to go a-stalking.

A rollup (seemingly with trunks) gives Savage two and he sends Warrior hard into the corner. Savage clotheslines him in the back of the head and drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow. Then he drops the top rope elbow….for two, just in case you didn’t know who was winning here.

Warrior Warriors Up and hits the shoulders into the gorilla press drop. The Warrior Splash connects for two and now Warrior is stunned. Warrior looks up, then looks at his hands, and starts walking up the aisle. Instead of taking the countout, Savage jumps him from behind and goes up top, only to miss his dive onto the barricade. Back in and Warrior’s flying shoulder sends Savage outside again. They get back in and do it again, as Savage’s bumps off the shoulder here are awesome. A third running shoulder sends Savage outside again and Warrior throws him back inside. Savage is DONE and Warrior gets the pin at 20:47.

Rating: A-. This felt like an epic showdown between two top stars and that is what it was supposed to be. You don’t get this kind of a match very often around the WWF and they made it work on every front. The ending scene of Savage being completely defeated made it look like the better man won, even with Savage and Sherri cheating every chance they could. Outstanding match here and it still more than holds up.

Post match Warrior leaves and Sherri berates Savage as he still can’t get up. She even kicks him over and over….until Elizabeth jumps the barricade and chases Sherri off (the ultra rare instance of her getting physical). Savage finally gets up and sees Elizabeth, leaving him very confused. Elizabeth stretches out her arms and Savage finally hugs her to a huge roar. Savage puts her on his shoulder and then holds the ropes open for her, because things have finally changed before them.

This is the moment that can still bring a bit of a tear to the eye of fans of my generation because it was YEARS in the making and the fans were begging Savage to take her back by the end. It’s Savage FINALLY being at peace and getting his happy ending after leaving it all in the ring. This is still one of the best things that WWE has ever done and it still gets to me, even if I’ve seen it dozens of times.

And now, a debate on instant replay in wrestling, with Vince McMahon moderating the discussion between New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner and NFL analyst Paul Maguire. Steinbrenner wants instant replay but if it takes more than a minute to get the call right, fire them. Vince: “What do you mean fire him? Like, from his job?” Maguire doesn’t like the idea and insults Steinbrenner over his comments. We get an instant replay, as looked at by the Bushwhackers, which results in the tape being ruined. Their ruling: the tape is inconclusive, therefore the play stands. This was bizarre to put it mildly, which might be why it isn’t on the Peacock version.

We run down what is left on the show as this feels like an intermission. Gorilla and Bobby talk about what has gone on so far, with Heenan saying if he was Savage, he would rather have some money than a skirt.

Regis Philbin interviews Undertaker and Paul Bearer, with Undertaker taking measurements for….reasons. Puns about being alive ensue.

Alex Trebek interviews Demolition, with Mr. Fuji, who yell a lot and scare Trebek a bit. Trebek tries to turn it into something Jeopardy-ish and the yelling gets has him throwing it back to Regis.

Regis tries to talk to Genichiro Tenryu and Koji Kitao about their match but can only use Japanese company names. They want to know where Kathy Lee (the co-host of his talk show) is and it doesn’t go well.

Jake Roberts and Damien scare Trebek off. Roberts tells Damien that he’ll have to settle for the home version of Jeopardy.

Those four segments? They were really, really bad.

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

This is Crush/Smash, with Mr. Fuji, in the very last try to push the team as meaning anything. Tenryu and Kitao are here as part of a partnership with Tenryu’s SWS promotion. Demolition jumps Kitao to start but Kitao knees Crush against the ropes. A distraction lets Smash get in a shot from behind though and Demolition takes over. Crush hits a top rope ax handle to the back as the fans aren’t exactly interested here. Kitao gets over for the tag off to Tenryu, who misses a top rope elbow. The Demolition Decapitator is loaded up but Kitao makes a save. Tenryu enziguris Smash and a powerbomb gives Tenryu the pin at 4:40.

Rating: D. Call it a style clash, call it Demolition being worthless at this point or call it the WWF not getting why this would be a bad idea, but this really did not work in any sense. The Ax/Smash version of Demolition was great, but the Crush/Smash version was Demolition in name only. This was more or less it for Demolition and based on this, that is the best thing for everyone involved.

Big Boss Man is tired of Bobby Heenan talking about his mama and has run through the Heenan Family. Now Mr. Perfect, and the Intercontinental Title, are all that’s left.

Bobby Heenan references the Rodney King beating and promises you’ll see something similar when Mr. Perfect beats up the Big Boss Man.

Intercontinental Title: Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Boss Man is challenging after spending months beating up the rest of the Heenan Family (Rick Rude was originally going to be included but he left the company in the fall). Alfred Hayes is joining commentary to replace Heenan, who is in Perfect’s corner. Boss Man catches Perfect’s towel and cleans himself off with it, much to Perfect’s annoyance. Perfect gets knocked around as the beating is on, including Perfect charging into a boot in the corner.

There’s the big toss over the top and you know Perfect is going to take a huge bump off that one. Back in and Boss Man takes off his belt, only to have Perfect take him away and start hammering him down. Some shots to the back keep Boss Man in trouble and we hit the abdominal stretch. With that broken up, a good looking dropkick gives Perfect two and the neck snap makes it worse.

The PerfectPlex is countered into a small package for two but Perfect knocks him down again. Perfect goes up and dives onto a raised boot, setting up the ram into the buckle for another huge Perfect bump. Boss Man crotches him against the post but a Heenan distraction lets Perfect send him into the steps.

With the numbers advantage causing issues, Andre the Giant (oh boy) comes out to….well it’s not exactly even but it definitely changes things. As you might expect, Heenan panics so Perfect goes after Andre, who smacks him in the face with the Intercontinental Title. A VERY delayed cover gets two and here are Haku and Barbarian to jump Boss Man for the DQ at 10:46.

Rating: C. There was a lot going on here but I still don’t get why Boss Man didn’t win the title. That would seem to be the most obvious ending but instead it just goes nowhere, with Boss Man getting the “feel good” win. Perfect very easily could have wont he title back a month or so later, but at least we got one more Andre appearance where he looked somewhat mobile.

Gene Okerlund interviews……Donald Trump, who hopes to have Wrestlemania back in Atlantic City. Chuck Norris is here too, and thinks the wrestlers are great athletes, even name dropping Argentina Rocca of all people. Henry Winkler is happy the Ultimate Warrior won. Lou Ferrigno finds this really entertaining. I need a Christmas special where those four get together and save Santa Claus.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Jimmy Hart is here with Earthquake. This is my regular chance to ask what the heck the WWF was thinking by making Valentine a good guy around this time. Earthquake starts fast and hits an early powerslam for two as the dominance seems to be on. Valentine avoids a charge in the corner and slowly hammers away. A running elbow to the head actually puts Earthquake down on one knee and a middle rope version actually knocks him down. The Figure Four is blocked and Hart offers a distraction, allowing Earthquake to drop the elbow. The Earthquake finishes Valentine at 3:17.

Rating: D+. The match was fine enough and Valentine got in some offense, but there is only so much that you can get out of this situation. Earthquake cleaned Valentine out and beat him without much effort. I’m still not sure who saw Valentine as a good guy but to call it a flop would be too kind.

The Legion of Doom promise to make Power And Glory sour and gory. That’s a heck of a line.

Legion of Doom vs. Power And Glory

Slick is here with Power And Glory. The Doomsday Device finishes Roma at 58 seconds and the LOD wants the Tag Team Titles.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Virgil had been mistreated for years and FINALLY snapped at the Royal Rumble after a tag match with DiBiase. Roddy Piper has been supporting Virgil, despite Piper being in a horrible motorcycle accident that has left him barely able to walk at the moment.

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Roddy Piper is here with Virgil, who punches DiBiase outside to start. With DiBiase back inside, Virgil punches him right back to the floor. Back in again and DiBiase gets clotheslined to the floor as the frustrations continue. A slower DiBiase gets back inside and this time a few shots slow Virgil down.

The beating is on, including a piledriver for two as commentary talks about how big of a show this has been. A suplex drops Virgil again and DiBiase heads outside to deck Piper. Back in and a powerslam gives DiBiase two but Piper uses his crutch to low bridge DiBiase to the floor. DiBiase goes after Piper but gets counted out at 7:42.

Rating: C-. As has been said, the problem with Virgil is that there just wasn’t anything there in the ring. His punches were his best weapon, as other than that, he was as generic as you could get. Getting the win over DiBiase was a nice moment, but they didn’t exactly make it feel like a big deal. It would have been too much to see Virgil pin him, but this wasn’t exactly thrilling.

Post match DiBiase goes after Piper’s knee again, with Sherri running in to help with the beating. Some crutch shots to the knee have Piper in trouble but Virgil gets up for the save. Piper is in agony but Virgil tells him to get up. Then Piper gets up with Virgil’s help.

Sean Mooney sends us to a recap of Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan. Slaughter has been playing by a new set of rules, including burning a Hulk Rules shirt. Adnan and Slaughter come in, with Adnan ranting a lot before we look at Slaughter jumping Hogan recently. Slaughter threatens to get himself disqualified or counted out in the main event. It doesn’t help that Slaughter getting disqualified or counted out was his best chance to retain the title.

Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Just in case the show hasn’t gone on long enough yet. Santana knocks him outside to start and hammers away back inside but Jimmy Hart slips Mountie the shock stick. One electrocution (and a joke about bad Mexican food from Heenan) and Santana is done at 1:21. This might be the all time definition of needless filler.

Hulk Hogan promises to use secret weapons to win the WWF Title. And no, a beating from Sgt. Slaughter isn’t slowing him down.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is defending, Marla Maples is the guest timekeeper, Alex Trebek is the guest ring announcer and Regis Philbin is on commentary. Hogan chases Adnan and Slaughter around to start before Slaughter even takes the belt off. We then pause for Slaughter to get ready before hitting the stall button for a bit longer. They lock up (accidentally knocking the referee down) and slaughter is sent into the corner.

Back up and Hogan runs him over with a shoulder, sending the champ outside. Slaughter grabs a chair but Hogan is waiting for him. Instead they head back inside, where Slaughter pokes him in the eye to take over. Heenan has to explain some of the backstory to Regis as Hogan slugs away to put Slaughter in the corner. Some rams into the buckle keep Slaughter in trouble as this isn’t exactly thrilling so far.

There’s a backdrop to Slaughter and a running knee sends him into the corner again. A catapult into the corner sets up the raining down right hands but Slaughter knocks a diving Hogan out of the air. Hogan shrugs that off and drops a bunch of elbows before going to the top (oh dear) where Adnan’s distraction lets Slaughter slam him down. Now a chair to the back can keep Hogan down on the floor, followed by the slow beating back inside.

Slaughter complains about the speed of a two count and the referee yells right back. The Boston crab goes on, all of four inches from the rope, so Hogan tries to power out anyway. With that not working, Hogan grabs the rope to escape, which feels pretty out of character. Some knees to the back set up a top rope knee to the back but for some reason Adnan distracts the referee, allowing Hogan to kick out.

A chair to the head busts Hogan open so Slaughter pounds away on the head and grabs the camel clutch. Hogan powers up again and escapes but Slaughter sends him into the corner. Slaughter puts the Iraqi flag onto Hogan and that’s enough for the Hulk Up. Said flag is destroyed and Hogan throws the punches, setting up the big boot and leg to get the title back at 20:22. Monsoon: “The war is now officially over.”

Rating: C+. The problem here is that it isn’t a bad match, but it might be the most obvious result in the history of….well perhaps human kind. Desert Storm was already over so this was just a formality, as Slaughter was a short form champion from the second he won the belt. Hogan did his normal match here, albeit a bit longer than usual, and the Hulk Up was short even by his standards. It’s completely fine, but with the war already over, it was nowhere near the feel good, special moment they were hoping it would be.

Hogan poses and waves the American flag to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show that has good pieces but DESPERATELY needed to be trimmed down. Would anyone have missed Earthquake vs. Valentine, Santana vs. Mountie or Von Erich vs. Bravo? The main event is on the lower end of Wrestlemania main events and the celebrity stuff is horrid. At the same time, Warrior vs. Savage is a classic and there is some other good stuff in there, but they really needed to cut this down by at least thirty minutes to get rid of some of the drag.

 

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B
2023 Redo: C+

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D-
2023 Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C-
2023 Redo: C

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F
2013 Redo: F
2015 Redo: F-
2023 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2015 Redo: A
2023 Redo: A-

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D-
2023 Redo: D

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: F+
2015 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D+
2023 Redo: C-

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+
2023 Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: B-
2023 Redo: C-

I’ve really come down on this one over the years and other than maybe boosting up Savage vs. Warrior a bit more, I’m not sure how I had some of those earlier ratings.

Here is the original if you’re interested:

The 2013 Edition:

And the 2015 Edition:http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/16/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-vii-no-that-isnt-a-tear-in-my-eye/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

WWF Rampage 1991
Hosts: Sean Mooney, Gene Okerlund, Bobby Heenan
Commentators: Lord Alfred Hayes, Sean Mooney, Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Jim Neidhart, Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

We’re still on the WWE Vault with another Coliseum Video, which should make for a bit of fun. These things are the definition of hit and miss but we can often see something good in there somewhere. Then again there can also be some drek to get through as this isn’t the best time for the company. Let’s get to it.

We’re on a golf course with Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan giving us some tips. Gene says his handicap is Heenan, who almost looks like a clown and thinks they’re about to play tennis.

From Fresno, California, June 18, 1991.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. British Bulldog

Perfect, with Coach (gah that didn’t work), is defending. Bulldog wastes no time in shoving him down and easily wins an exchange of shoulders. After a breather on the floor, Perfect is smart enough to not go for a test of strength. Bulldog accuses him of being a chicken, which Hayes does not think is the British way. For some reason Perfect tries a test of strength and immediately screams “AH YOU SON OF A B****!”

Even commentary has to cover for that one, thankfully with Bulldog getting two off a rollup. They trade sunset flips for two each and Bulldog gets in a bunch of rams into the corner on various turnbuckles. Perfect is back up with a shot of his own though and we slow back down for a breather. A Boston crab, with a grab of a rope, has Bulldog’s back in trouble but he powers out anyway. Perfect’s nice dropkick sends Bulldog outside, where Coach gets in some rather lame stomps.

Cue Bret Hart to chase Coach off so Perfect hits the Hennig necksnap but the referee almost gets bumped. After a bit of chastisement, Perfect goes with the sleeper and gets a pair of arm drops. That’s enough to make Bulldog fight up and he crotches Perfect on top, naturally with a hilarious sell. The referee gets bumped though and Bulldog can’t get a count off a small package. Coach comes in so Hart cuts him off and counts the pin because he’s a bit nuts at the moment. Hart and Perfect get in a fight and the referee sees it for the DQ at 9:32.

Rating: C+. Nice enough stuff here and that shouldn’t be surprising given who was in there. These two are talented stars who can have a good match with anyone and they had a bit of time here. That being said, the ending felt like a bit of an escape hatch and having Hart counting the pin was just kind of nuts.

Post match Hart beats up Perfect even more but Bulldog isn’t overly happy.

Gene hits a shot which seems to be good, though there is nothing in the way of tips. Well other than where to send a postcard to request a fan favorite match.

From New York City, April 22, 1991.

Warlord vs. Texas Tornado

Commentary argues over which of these two is smarter and….yeah all hail the Warlord. They take their time to lock up and then stop to pose some more, with Warlord not being happy at not being so popular. We get the test of strength and Tornado goes down for a two count, which you don’t see very often. Tornado fights up and blocks a big boot, setting up the Tornado Punch.

For some reason Warlord doesn’t even go down, instead grabbing a bearhug. That’s finally broken up so Warlord knocks him to the floor, which Monsoon says is Tornado taking a break. Warlord drives him back first into the post and they come back in, with Tornado not being able to make a sunset flip work. The slow forearms to the back have Tornado in trouble, to the point where he can’t pick Warlord up.

Warlord misses….we’ll call it a splash so Tornado is up with the clothesline comeback. The Tornado Punch gets two with Warlord getting a foot on the rope. Tornado gets a sleeper but they crash out to the floor for the double countout at 9:18. Ignore Tornado being back in before the ten count, to the point where even Heenan thinks he made it.

Rating: D. Oh heck no as this was rather horrible with Tornado being pretty much useless. It’s a bad sign when Warlord is carrying the whole thing and then they had the lame finish on top of that. This was one of the worst matches I’ve seen in a good while and it somehow just kept getting worse.

Post match Tornado argues with the referee, probably asking where he parked his chicken.

From New York City, June 3, 1991.

Animal vs. Paul Roma

Before the match, Roma and Hercules have a coin toss to determine which one will face Animal, which might be slightly interesting if Mooney’s voiceover hadn’t said it would be Roma. Hercules just stays in the ring at the bell and distracts Animal so Roma can hammer away. They actually trade leapfrogs until Animal catches Roma with an atomic drop. A headbutt between the legs keeps Roma in trouble but he knocks Animal off the top to the floor.

Back in and Roma hammers away, setting up a rather high dropkick. Three straight backbreakers set up a top rope shot to Animal’s head as this is more one sided than you might think. Animal fights up and they trade reversals until the referee gets bumped. A flying shoulder hits Roma for no count so Hercules gets in a cheap shot. Roma accidentally missile dropkicks Hercules though, allowing Animal to grab a powerslam for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: C-. This was in the weird non-Hawk period for the Legion Of Doom and that isn’t the most memorable stretch of time for a reason. There wasn’t much to see here other than Animal winning a glorified handicap match, which thankfully didn’t last long. Roma’s dropkicks looked good at least.

It’s back to the golf course, where Gene explains the importance of a chip shot. Gene’s shot goes fairly well while Heenan’s club goes flying. They move on to a shot from a bunker, with Heenan advocating cheating while Gene hits a nice shot. Heenan cheats anyway and Gene is aghast. Finally we move on to putting, with Heenan cheating again to succeed, which has Gene stunned.

From Fresno, California, June 18, 1991.

Big Boss Man/Rockers vs. Nasty Boys/Mountie

In case you wanted the most 1991 match possible. Jimmy Hart is here with the villains and the Nastys are the Tag Team Champions. Knobbs holds up one of the titles in an early Ric Flair impression. Shawn, with his backwards neon green hat (again, 1991) starts with the Mountie but Shawn tags in Boss Man, who gets taken into the corner by Sags (for the first contact over two minutes in).

A fairly delayed powerslam plants Sags right back down Mountie comes in and gets spinebustered, with the villains being cleared out for a needed breather. Back in and Boss Man enziguris Knobbs so Jannetty can come in with a middle rope faceplant. A sunset flip gives Jannetty two and it’s back to Shawn for the superkick. Boss Man adds an elbow to the face and does that weird bouncing headlock of his.

Sags finally gets in a cheap shot from the apron and Boss Man crashes out to the floor so the villains can finally get control. Sags drops some elbows and Mountie’s elbow to the jaw gets two. To avoid being left out, Knobbs drops an elbow of his own for two more before taking Boss Man into the corner. The Rockers are drawn in, which is enough for the triple teaming to continue.

Mountie confirms his identity by shouting “I AM THE MOUNTIE!”, which is enough for Boss Man to fight up. Shawn comes in to clean house as everything breaks down. In the melee, Shawn intercepts the megaphone and knocks Knobs out, only to get shocked by Mountie’s shock stick. Not that it matters as Jannetty steals the pin at 10:12.

Rating: C+. This got better near the end but the heat segment didn’t last very long, meaning there was a lot of other stuff to cover the rest of the time. What helps here is the lineup was interesting enough that it gave for some nice options, which is the point of a six man tag. It’s not a great match but it’s perfectly fun for this kind of a spot.

From New York City, New York, June 3, 1991.

The Dragon vs. Smash

Sure why not. Demolition was done at this point and Smash was waiting for a new gimmick. The Dragon was Ricky Steamboat without being able to call him Ricky Steamboat because his divorce was really nasty (and ridiculous). Smash works on the arm to start but you know Steamboat is fine with doing something just like that. Back up and Steamboat has to skin the cat (of course) before sending Smash over the top.

Smash gets back in and is quickly armdragged into an armbar as Steamboat is quickly checking his boxes here. Some chops to the head (or about four inches in front of his head) have Smash in more trouble and we’re right back to the armdrag into the armbar. Back up and Smash gets something like a chokeslam to cut Steamboat down and a belly to back suplex gets two, with Monsoon really not being pleased with the technique.

The neck crank goes on for a bit before Smash sends him outside again, this time for a ram into the post. A slam on the floor and a backbreaker back inside sets up another neck crank, which he switches into a sleeper to keep Steamboat in trouble. Steamboat finally fights up and strikes away, setting up a dropkick to the floor. A middle rope dive to the floor takes Smash down again but he suplexes Steamboat back inside. Smash misses a charge though and the high crossbody gives Steamboat the win at 10:17.

Rating: D+. Oh come on what else were you expecting here? Steamboat can do something good with just about anyone but he needs something more than a bored Smash, who is barely a singles star in the first place. This did not work and was boring on top of going longer than it needed. If you have someone as talented as Steamboat, find a better way to use him.

From Green Bay, Wisconsin, May 7, 1991.

Jake Roberts vs. Barbarian

Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, stalks him around to start and Jake’s left hands don’t do much good. An armbar doesn’t get Jake very far so Barbarian hammers away, at least until a knee lift takes him down. The threat of the DDT sends Barbarian bailing to the floor and we stall for a bit.

Back in and Barbarian pounds him down again, with Heenan getting in some choking. A backbreaker gives Barbarian two and he seems to rip at Jake’s face for a change. Jake’s short arm clothesline misses and Barbarian kicks him in the face, only for Jake to bounce back with a DDT. Cue Earthquake for a distraction so Jake busts out Damien and chases him off….for the countout at 7:27.

Rating: C-. Well, at least it was a bit shorter. This tape has hit a wall with the last two matches and I’m not sure I can see that getting much better. Barbarian is a prime example of someone who played a role perfectly well despite not being a big star. He was doing it again here, but Jake Roberts can’t beat the Barbarian in a match like this? That’s quite the stretch.

Bobby and Gene are seemingly off the course in an attempt to find a ball. Naturally, Bobby cheats again because that is his nature.

From London, England, April 24, 1991.

Greg Valentine vs. Haku

Oh come on. This is from the dreadful Valentine face run and he grabs a headlock to start. An atomic drop into a running elbow to the head sends Haku outside for a needed breather. Back in and Haku kind of bobs and weaves a bit before chopping away in the corner. Some backbreakers give Haku two and we hit the reverse chinlock.

Valentine fights up but gets caught in it again, only to fight up again (it worked the first time). Some rams into the buckle have Haku staggered, which has Vince a bit surprised on commentary. Piper: “Go after him Gregory!” The big elbow misses though and Haku strikes away again, only to get headbutted between the legs. The Figure Four attempt is blocked but Valentine grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C. This is a good example of a match that was technically fine but….who in the world was wanting to cheer Valentine? It’s just a weird idea and something that never exactly worked. That was on display here and while the match was ok because both of them are talented stars, it’s hard to get behind eternal heel Valentine, even against someone like Haku.

From Tuscon, Arizona, May 28, 1991.

Power & Glory vs. Orient Express

Slick and Mr. Fuji are here for a rather rare heel vs. heel match. We get a fairly long staredown to start until Hercules shoves Kato down to start. It works so well that Hercules does it again but Kato chops away in the corner. Hercules isn’t having that and blocks a whip out of the corner, only to miss an elbow. A gorilla press works a bit better on Tanaka as it’s weird to see the fans cheering for Power & Glory (at least more than they’re cheering for the Express).

Roma reminds the fans that the team is evil too and by coming in for a double clothesline. After some nice leapfrogs, Roma drops Tanaka again and hits a nice top rope elbow for two. Kato gets in a cheap shot though and comes in with an elbow to the face as things slow back down. Roma fights out of a chinlock but gets tripped by Fuji, giving us the threat of a manager brawl (actually….Slick vs. Fuji could be awesome).

Hercules gets drawn in so Tanaka can jump over Kato and onto Roma’s back for two. Roman jumps over a double clothesline and Hercules comes back in for his own double clothesline despite the lack of a tag. A heck of a dropkick to Kato gives Roma two and Tanaka’s sunset flip gets two more. Slick low bridges Kato down to the floor though and everyone goes outside for the double countout at 8:28.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match here, but dang it was more weird than anything else. Power & Glory fit into the good guys slot (albeit by default) pretty easily here and I could go for seeing them do it a bit more. That being said, I still want to see Slick vs. Fuji, as that just sounds fun. As in what a lot of this tape has not exactly been.

Back to the course, with Heenan lying to another player about where his ball went.

And now, At Home With Paul Bearer. After taking a very long time to get inside, Bearer is messing with a body in a casket, because he had to bring some of his work home. He apologizes for not tidying up and then sits down in something of a throne. Bearer offers us a drink, which might be made of human remains. He looks at some knickknacks, such as the Urn, a dead plant and a skull, plus a guillotine. This was pretty much little more than The WWF Addams Family and it wasn’t any good.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, June 2, 1991.

Undertaker vs. Ultimate Warrior

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker. Warrior cleans house to start and hammers away, only to get his neck snapped over the top rope. Back in and Undertaker grabs Warrior by the face, which was a big thing for him back in the day. This goes on for far too long, with Warrior powering out after nearly three minutes of Undertaker just holding his face. Warrior fights up but gets knocked down again, only to avoid the big running elbow. Another comeback is cut off and Undertaker hits a quick Tombstone but Warrior pops up. Then Undertaker hits him with the Urn for the DQ at 7:44.

Rating: D-. Warrior did pretty much nothing here other than surviving the Tombstone but then the match just ended before anything else could happen. It isn’t a good sign when so much of the match was spent with the Undertaker just standing there with his hand over Warrior’s face. Pretty horrible match here, and probably the only reason this tape was uploaded in the first place.

Post match Undertaker and Bearer load up a body bag but Warrior fights out and clears the ring.

Heenan and Gene argue over who is paying for the golf and a golf cart chase takes us out.

Overall Rating: D+. There are a few passable matches early on in the tap to carry things but this just falls apart after the six man tag. It’s a pretty sad day when you have Greg Valentine vs. Haku as a high point for the second half of a nearly two hour tape. While there are worse tapes out there and this did have a nice variety (with no Hogan anywhere to be seen), but dang the match quality is just not there to back it up. Find something else to watch.

 

 

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Summerslam 1991
Date: August 26, 1991
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Roddy Piper, Gorilla Monsoon

This is a show that almost no one remembers other than one match. The main event is Hogan/Warrior vs. Slaughter/Adnan/Mustafa, which would have been a much better match a few months ago when Slaughter was still a threat. Other than that we have the wedding of Savage and Miss Elizabeth who reunited at Wrestlemania VII in one of the best moments in company history. Let’s get to it.

We open with Savage in the back getting ready while Alfred Hayes asks him questions. Savage says that he’s ready and in the danger zone, but HAYES’ TIE IS CROOKED. “NOW YOU’RE OK AND IT’S TIME TO GO CHECK MY BABY BLUE EYES!”

We get the regular intro with the theme of a match made in Heaven and a match made in Hell.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Ssteamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Sean Mooney says to call some hotline to hear prerecorded comments from Liz and Savage!

Mr. Perfect says he’s an awesome champion.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart

Perfect has been champion since last November so he’s a pretty big deal. He also has his Coach (former wrestler John Tolos) with him. Stu and Helen Hart are in the audience to watch their son. Feeling out process to start with Bret scoring first by hip tossing Perfect to the floor. Back in and Bret grabs a headlock followed by a crucifix for two. Bret puts the headlock on again as Heenan and Piper are going to war on commentary. Gorilla: “WILL YOU STOP???”

Perfect grabs at the hair to escape and chops Bret’s chest off. A slam puts Bret down but he kicks Perfect away and slams him down, only to have Perfect kick him right back. Bret is all like screw this wrestling stuff and clotheslines Perfect to the floor. The champ tries to run but Bret throws him back in and the dude in pink is mad. Perfect gets in a HARD kick to the ribs and Bret is sent to the floor where Coach whistles at him.

Bret tries to get up but is knocked off the apron and right on top of a production guy who has a very confused look on his face. Back in and Bret jumps over Perfect in the corner and gets two off a rollup. The fans are WAY into this so far. Perfect sends Bret chest first into the buckle to take over again as Heenan is starting to lose his marbles. Another hard whip into the buckle gets two for the champion followed by the Hennig neck snap for two more.

Hart is sent to the floor for a bit and they both come back in on the top. It’s Bret crashing down to the mat to give Perfect two as Heenan is thinking Perfect should get himself disqualified. The champ hooks a sleeper but Bret fights up into a crucifix, only to be dropped down into a Samoan drop for two. The PerfectPlex looks to finish Bret but it only gets two, sending MSG into delirium.

Back up and Bret fights back, sending Perfect across the ring and crotch first into the post. A suplex and small package get two each for Bret and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. Bret yells at the referee and gets rolled up for two before Bret starts going after the knee. He loads up the Sharpshooter but he has to knock Coach to the floor. The distraction lets Perfect get in a shot to take over. Perfect drops a leg between Bret’s legs but as he tries it again, Bret grabs the leg and puts the Sharpshooter on from his back. He turns the hold over and Perfect submits really fast but it’s good for Bret’s first singles title.

Rating: A. Oh come on it’s Bret vs. Perfect from Summerslam 91. Do I really need to explain this one? It’s one of the best matches of all time and holds up over twenty years later. The counter by Bret is a great way to show how solid of a mat wrestler he was. Kicking out of the PerfectPlex was the perfect idea as Bret took the champ’s best shots and still won. It’s still excellent and required viewing for wrestling fans.

Bret celebrates with his parents.

The Bushwhackers are ready for the Natural Disasters and Andre is ready for Earthquake, the man who broke his leg a few weeks back.

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Andre looks terrible here and would be dead in less than 18 months. The Whackers sneak up on the big men on the floor and poke them in the eyes. We finally start with Butch vs. Typhoon and the big man being bitten on the trunks. Earthquake tries to come in but splashes his own partner by mistake. A double clothesline puts Quake down and the Bushwhackers are in full control.

Earthquake finally realizes he weighs more than both Bushwhackers put together and pounds Butch down with a few shots to the back. Heenan makes an obscure Newhart reference as Quake slams Butch into the corner but misses an elbow drop to the back. The second attempt connects though and it’s off to Typhoon for more fat man offense.

Off to an over the shoulder backbreaker on Butch which transitions into a bearhug by Earthquake. Heenan leaves to go find Hogan and embarrass him which we’ll get to later. Quake finally hits Typhoon with a clothesline by mistake as everything breaks down. The Bushwhackers hit Battering Rams on both Disasters but it’s finally the big men crushing Luke and the Earthquake for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was a waste of time and everyone knew it was going to be from the moment the bell rang. The Bushwhackers were the epitome of comedy bumpkins and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m not sure why they picked them of all teams for Andre to back and the match was horrible.

Post match the Disasters go after Andre but the LOD comes out for the save. This was Andre’s last appearance for the company.

Heenan goes to Hogan’s dressing room with the NWA World Title to issue a challenge. “Hogan” (you never see him) opens the door and slams it in Heenan’s face. For the life of me I can’t get over seeing that belt in the WWF.

Virgil recaps his feud with DiBiase. You’re probably familiar with this one: Virgil was his bodyguard for years but at the Rumble, DiBiase pushed him just once too often and Virgil snapped. DiBiase lost to Virgil via countout at Wrestlemania and tonight it’s a rematch with the Million Dollar Title on the line.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

This is one of the very rare defenses of this title. DiBiase has Sensational Sherri with him. Piper is Virgil’s mentor so the commentary is going to be rather slanted. Virgil starts fast and hits three straight clotheslines to send DiBiase out to the floor. Heenan is back on commentary but doesn’t want to talk about Hogan. Virgil misses a dive to the floor and DiBiase sends him into the steps to keep him down. Back inside and Ted is in full control but he brags too much and gets caught in the Million Dollar Dream. The fans go nuts but Sherri comes in and blasts Virgil with her loaded purse for the DQ.

Rating: D. Actually hang on a minute.

The referee says the match MUST continue, sending Sherri to the back and Roddy into delirium. Virgil pounds on DiBiase in the corner but since he doesn’t have much experience he can’t do anything. He tries to whip DiBiase across the ring but gets countered into a ref bump to put both guys down. Ted yells at Piper like the true heel that he is before suplexing Virgil down. A piledriver lays Virgil out but sicne there’s no referee, DiBiase rips the turnbuckle off instead. Ted yells at Piper once too often though, allowing Virgil to ram him into the buckle twice for the pin and the title. Piper goes NUTS.

Rating: D+. This is a good example of a match where the crowd and announcing make it much better than it would have been otherwise. Virgil just wasn’t that good and this was his one and only storyline with the company due to there being nothing else to his character. How the guy kept a job for so many years with both WWF and WCW is beyond me.

The Mountie is ready for his Jailhouse Match with Boss Man. We get a clip of him shocking a handcuffed Boss Man from a few weeks ago. Moutnie insults the New York cops who take the loser to jail later tonight.

Boss Man says Mountie is going to jail tonight.

Mountie vs. Big Boss Man

Mountie talks trash to start so Boss Man punches him in the mouth to take over. They slug it out with Boss Man hitting a back elbow and a splash for two. Boss Man hits his running crotch attack to the back of Mountie’s neck followed by the sliding uppercut. Mountie dives into a good looking spinebuster for two but Boss Man chases Jimmy Hart instead of following up, earning him a trip into the steps.

Back in and Boss Man misses a splash in the corner as Heenan says it’s not Mayberry for the Boss Man tonight. Mountie gets two each off some elbows and a dropkick but the kickout sends him to the floor. He pulls Boss Man to the floor as Gorilla calls Jimmy a walking advertisement for birth control. Back in and they slug it out with Mountie hitting a piledriver for no cover. Instead Mountie gets his shock stick but only hits the mat. A hard uppercut sets up the Boss Man Slam for two (I don’t remember anyone not named Hogan kicking out of that) before another piledriver attempt is countered into an Alabama Slam to end Mountie.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen far worse and Boss Man’s high impact offense is always worth a look. This is the perfect blowoff to the feud which is something you rarely see anymore. Today feuds just keep going with some random gimmick match which may or may not fit the feud. This was the logical ending to it and it was tailor made for the blowoff. Why thy don’t do this anymore is beyond me.

Mountie is dragged away by cops.

DiBiase goes on a huge rant about the title, saying that Virgil stole it and he’ll get it back.

Bret says this is the best day of his career and he waited a long time to prove how great he is. I’m pretty sure we’re in intermission.

The Natural Disasters are going to eat the Legion of Doom for dinner.

Boss Man asks Sean Mooney what kind of bird can’t fly. A jailbird of course. He brags about winning a bit more.

Savage is nervous for the wedding.

Speaking of the wedding, here’s the phone number again, complete with a countdown clock for a five minute intermission. Seriously they just count down five minutes of dead air time. AND THIS WAS ON THE HOME VIDEO.

Mountie arrives at the jail and shouts that the cops can’t do this to him because HE’S THE MOUNTIE! He tries to read the cops their rights and gets thrown in a cell.

Jimmy Hart is panicking while his Nasty Boys are read for the LOD. It’s a street fight later tonight.

Mountie is tricked into having his picture taken.

The Legion of Doom wants the tag titles. Hawk says once they win the belts they’re going to chew up the Natural Disasters and spit them out “like the tartar that sticks to your teeth.”

Mountie yells about having being fingerprinted. These bits are so overblown that they’re hilarious.

Sgt. Slaughter and his cronies are excited about having a 3-2 advantage. Slaughter says he might have a surprise for later.

Sid Justice, the referee for the main event tonight, says that he’ll call it down the middle. Gene shows us a video of Slaughter and company offering Sid a spot on the team but Sid says they stopped him but he turned them down.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Legion of Doom

The Nasties are defending and this is No Countout/No DQ, making it a street fight in modern terms. The champions are sent to the floor and the fight is on early. Back in the ring Animal hits a quick powerbomb on Knobbs for two followed by Hawk enziguring Sags down. We get down to the stupid tagging part of the street fight with Sags sending Hawk to the floor and hitting him with a bucket of water.

Back in and Knobbs works over Hawk in the corner before Sags sends him into the steps. A back elbow gets two for Knobbs and a top rope version gets the same for Sags. Brian goes up top again but jumps into Hawk’s boot, finally allowing for the hot tag off to Animal. Everything breaks down and Sags hits Animal in the back with Jimmy’s helmet for two. Hawk steals the helmet and lays out both Nasties, setting up the Doomsday Device on Sags for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This SUCKED as the street fight rule was barely used at all. It was little more than a few shots with the helmet when the referee wasn’t looking anyway. Hawk and Animal barely broke a sweat out there as they were already talking about the Natural Disasters earlier tonight instead of worrying about winning the belts. This win was a long time coming though.

The Mountie is put in a cell by some VERY sweaty policemen.

I.R.S. vs. Greg Valentine

Uh…..sure. Feeling out process to start so Gorilla recaps the show so far. Valentine takes over with a quick shoulder block and a clothesline. Somehow we’re nearly two minutes into the match with this much action. IRS rolls to the floor as Gorilla says Undertaker and Jake Roberts might be here. Back in and Valentine slams him down, sending IRS right back to the floor.

The tax guy heads in again and puts on an abdominal stretch followed by a jumping clothesline for no cover. Off to a chinlock before IRS misses a knee into the corner, giving Greg the opening on the leg. The Figure Four is quickly broken by a grab of the ropes and a second attempt at the hold is countered into a small package for the pin by IRS.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that bad but it had no business being on a pay per view. This would be the equivalent of the Divas match on a modern show to give the fans a breather between the big matches. Valentine was long past his point of being a star but he could still put people over like he did here.

Buy Hulk Hogan’s PPV, which is a Best of Hogan show. I’ve heard of worse ideas.

Hogan and Warrior talk about their victims in the main event.

Ultimate Warrior/Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Sid Justice is guest referee and Hogan is WWF Champion. Hogan and Slaughter get things going but the Sarge wants to stall. Slaughter pounds on him in the corner but gets caught between the right hands of both superheroes. Off to Warrior for a clothesline followed by a double big boot to put Slaughter down again. A clothesline gets two for Hogan and it’s back to Warrior. This is completely one sided so far. Hogan comes back in with a middle rope ax handle for two.

Sid breaks up some choking in the corner and the distraction lets Slaughter get in some shots on Hogan. Adnan, an old manager, comes in to rake Hogan’s back and slowly pound away in the corner. Off to Mustafa (Iron Sheik) for the gutwrench suplex and the camel clutch but Warrior makes the save. Slaughter comes back in to choke away in the corner and send Hogan into Sid for a staredown. Sarge jumps the distracted Hogan and stomps away on the back.

Warrior breaks up a top rope something by Slaughter, allowing for the hot tag to the painted one. Warrior cleans house on Slaughter but runs into Sid for another staredown. Back to Mustafa who gets caught in a suplex but Slaughter blocks a tag. Slaughter puts Warrior in a chinlock, only to have the Ultimate One fight up and clothesline Sarge down. There’s the hot tag to Hogan as Hogan chases the lackeys to the back with a chair. More on that later as Hogan throws powder in Slaughter’s face and drops the leg to win.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of this one as the match was never in doubt at all, but above that the Iraq War had been over for six months so the interest in the feud was done long ago. Nothing to see here but the fans reacted pretty well to it. This would have been better as a house show main event instead of the main event of Summerslam. If nothing else there was a match around this time on a Coliseum Video with Slaughter/Mustafa/Undertaker against the superheroes. Wouldn’t that make a much better main event here?

Hogan and Sid pose for a long time post match.

Mountie is in jail and a fat biker hits on him.

Hogan and Sid are STILL posing.

We get the video of Savage proposing to Liz and her responding with an OH YEAH. We also get a four minute music video highlighting their entire history together to a sappy love song.

The ring is set up like a chapel for the wedding. Savage comes out in a shiny tux with a big feather on his hat. Heenan: “Why is the second most important guy called the best man?” From what I’ve read this is a legit renewal of vows as the two were already married in real life. There isn’t much to say here other than it’s a wedding and no one interrupts it. This takes like ten minutes.

With the show in the arena done we go to the reception with Savage telling Heenan to beat it. Gene Okerlund does the ceremonial toast. They have the first dance and everything seems to be fine. Now we eat cake before heading over to the gift table where things get interesting.

First off, “WE GOT A BLENDER!!!” Savage freaks out as only he can as you would think he just got the WWF Title instead of a blender. Liz goes to open a present…..and there’s a cobra inside. She freaks out and Savage tries to pull her back, but Undertaker comes in and bashes him in the head with the urn. Jake Roberts comes in and holds the cobra in front of Liz’s face until Sid makes the save with a chair to end the show. This would set up Roberts vs. Savage in the feud of the year which resulted in Undertaker’s face turn.

Overall Rating: C-. This is an interesting show in that the first half is a much higher quality than the second half. The second half has all predictable matches where the winners were never in doubt, but that doesn’t exactly make it terrible. The show is definitely entertaining and set up a lot of stuff down the road while launching Bret Hart up to the next level. It’s worth a watch if you can find it in full but I wouldn’t expect to be blown away.

Ratings Comparison

British Bulldog/Ricky Steamboat/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Original: D

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: A+

Redo: A

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: D+

Big Bossman vs. The Mountie

Original: D

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Nasty Boys

Original: D

Redo: D

Irwin R. Schyster vs. Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dang this show ticked me off the first time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/25/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1991-a-wedding-that-goes-badly-what-a-new-concept/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania VIII
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

This was one of the names mentioned for a possible redo so I’ll throw it in as a bonus. On his podcast, Bruce Prichard mentioned this as one of the worst Wrestlemanias ever and I’m really not sure why. The show features a double main event with Ric Flair defending the WWF World Title against Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan’s possible retirement match against Sid Justice. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon gives us the big over the top introduction as only he can do. It only talks about the double main event but really, nothing else is worth talking about.

Gorilla and Bobby (with a VERY visible section of empty seats between their heads, which will be a recurring problem tonight) intro the show with Heenan looking for the pictures. Those would be promised “centerfolds” of Elizabeth, which Ric Flair has promised. More on this later.

Reba McIntyre singes the Star Spangled Banner. It’s odd to hear anything but America the Beautiful.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Tito is a bullfighter (it didn’t work then either) and Heenan says he’s McIntyre’s sister. Heenan: “That’s arriba McIntyre!” Shawn has Sherri with him and we get a cool shot from behind with Shawn looking up at the huge stadium. This is his first singles Wrestlemania so it’s quite the big moment for his career. Heenan thinks Shawn is a future Intercontinental Champion. He’s a few months early but he certainly can call things.

We get a long stretch of Sherri leaving and some trash talk before we actually do anything because stalling is a thing on stadium shows too. They start fast (once they start that is) with Tito getting two off a crossbody and headlocking him to the mat. Shawn gets sent outside in a heap and that means it’s time for the over the top selling. We hit the headlock again and MY GOODNESS there are some half empty sections very visible in the upper deck. If that happened today, the production staff would all be fired.

Tito pops him in the jaw and Sherri is panicking at the thought of Shawn’s face being damaged. It’s back to the headlock and Shawn can’t even throw him off with a lift into the air. Heenan swears that he’s won a match with a headlock and that someone even gave up during instructions.

Back up and Shawn finally throws him over the top for a huge crash to take over. A backbreaker keeps Tito in trouble as Sherri is taking her glove off for some reason. We hit the chinlock and even more of those empty sections are shown. There’s almost no angle you can show here that doesn’t display them and it’s really distracting. Tito fights up but charges into the superkick (not yet a finisher) and Heenan declares no more tacos tonight.

The Teardrop Suplex is broken up and Tito scores with his flying forearm (Heenan: “That’s the Flying Jalapeno!”) to send Shawn outside. Back in and Tito slugs away, allowing Shawn to do the overblown Wrestlemania selling for the first time. El Paso Del Muerte (jumping forearm to the back) sends Shawn to the floor and Tito tries a suplex, only to have Shawn grab the rope and fall on top for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: B-. Good opener here as Tito is one of those guys who is always good for a solid performance. Shawn’s star was clearly on the rise here (give someone Sherri if you need them to get a rocket attached to their back) and a win in a competitive match was a good start. Solid match here and that’s all it needed to be.

Gene Okerlund is on the platform and brings out the Legion of Doom for an interview, including manager Paul Ellering. Paul talks about the need to put the team together in the first place and now revenge has brought them back together. He’s not here to get rich but to get even. Animal talks about facing and defeating adversity and now it’s time to get revenge on everyone, including Jimmy Hart and Money Inc.

Hawk says they’re a runaway train and now, look who’s driving the train. Paul wraps it up by saying they’re going to earn their money the old fashioned way: beating people for it. They want the titles back and don’t care who they have to beat to get them back. Ellering was good for the team in the NWA but I have no idea why he was needed here. Or why he’s somehow back in WWE twenty six years later.

Jake Roberts isn’t bringing a snake back to the ring but he will recap his feud with Undertaker. He’s gone full evil to go after Ultimate Warrior but since Warrior left the company, Undertaker turned face on Jake, setting up the match. Jake trapped Undertaker’s hand in the casket on the Funeral Parlor and laid Bearer out with a DDT, followed by a chair shot to Undertaker. Evil Jake was awesome but this was a bit of a different kind of animal.

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

I love that pulling himself up from the corner thing that Jake does. Diamond Dallas Page borrowed it from him and it’s not all that surprising. Jake slugs away to start and reality sets in very quickly. A running right hand puts Undertaker on the floor but Jake gets pulled outside as well. The beating is on and the fans are WAY into a fired up Undertaker.

Back in and Jake’s right hands still don’t have much effect so Bobby starts making Munsters references. Better than the Addams Family at least. Undertaker starts choking but Jake grabs a quick DDT and you can feel the fans react. Then Undertaker sits up and it’s very clear that this is something different. Another DDT drops Undertaker again but this time Jake goes after Bearer….as Undertaker gets up again. That means a Tombstone on the floor and Jake is DEAD for the pin at 6:41.

Rating: D. This was around the time where the Undertaker would start to be the kind of attraction that the company wanted him to be. It’s clear that there’s something very different about him and beating a big name like Roberts was a great way to push him towards that goal. I mean, beating Hogan less than six months ago did it even more so but still, awesome booking here. This was Jake’s last match with the company until 1996 as he was turned down for Pat Patterson’s job and left as a result.

Roddy Piper and Bret Hart are in the back with Roddy talking about growing up together when Bret was a bit dumb. Apparently Mrs. Hart would make them sandwiches but Bret finally cuts him off. They’re supposed to have a nice contest for the Intercontinental Title but Bret wants to be serious. That’s fine with Roddy and the match is on. Bret lost the title due to wrestling with a high fever and Piper won it almost immediately. This is Bret’s big rematch and one of the most intriguing matches on the show.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Piper is defending. The first minute is spent with Piper taking off his kilt and some instructions from the referee. Never let it be said that Wrestlemania doesn’t know how to waste time. Piper armdrags him down to start as Monsoon actually analyzes the match, which isn’t something you get from most other announcers. Heenan’s idea: waffle the other guy with a tire iron.

Piper tries some amateur wrestling and is quickly sent outside in a huff. Back in and Piper spits at Bret and Heenan wants an apology right now. Bret wins a battle of the wristlocks and Piper can’t chop his way to freedom. Monsoon says thirty countries are watching the show live, lists off three of them, and then stops for a good fifteen seconds of silence. A running dropkick drops Piper but Bret comes up holding his shoulder. Heenan sees right through it (Bobby: “WHAT A GREAT MOVE!”) and Roddy is REALLY not happy.

Bret comes back with a running crossbody and they fall out to the floor at the same time. Piper is up first and holds the ropes for Bret but naturally gets in a cheap shot to take over. Well you know he’s the most natural heel ever so it’s not exactly a surprise. A bulldog gives Piper two and Bret is busted open (which he lied about, claiming that it was a hardway cut to save his job) somewhere in there.

Bret is fine enough to get two off a sunset flip and Heenan is begging for some more violence. A slugout goes to Piper so Bret hits a running forearm to knock him outside. Back in and a double clothesline puts them both down with Piper’s head landing on Bret. Heenan wants a count but Monsoon accurately says all four shoulders are down so there can’t be a pin. So much for the Brain.

Bret is up first with the Five Moves of Doom but Piper blocks the Sharpshooter. The middle rope elbow hits a raised boot and Piper has an opening. The referee gets bumped though and Bret is sent face first into the steps. Piper grabs the bell but can’t bring himself to do it (Heenan: “GIVE IT TO ME! I’LL HIT HIM!”), instead grabbing a sleeper. Bret climbs the corner and flips backwards onto Piper for the pin and the title at 13:52.

Rating: A-. This is the match that you point at when you need to prove that Piper can put on a good match when he’s given the chance. Bret winning the title back here was all that this should have been and the classic made it an even better moment. That ending would be used several times over the years and is rather famous in its own right, which is rather fitting when it comes from a classic wrestler like Bret. Great match here and another example of how talented both of them really are.

They shake hands to make it clear that Piper is still on the good side.

Heenan sends us to Atlanta, Georgia and the home of future WBF Bodystars Champion Lex Luger. Lex is his usual smug self and praises Bobby while calling Gorilla fat. Luger takes off his shirt to reveal a muscle shirt and Heenan is WAY too excited. He has some milk to wrap this up with Monsoon not exactly being impressed. Monsoon: “You found someone even more conceited than you are!”

The Mountie, the Nasty Boys and Repo Man are excited for the eight man tag.

Sgt. Slaughter, Jim Duggan, Virgil and Big Boss Man are excited for the eight man tag. Remember that Slaughter was main eventing the show last year.

Comedian Ray Combs is guest ring announcer for said eight man tag and of course he has some jokes. Since we can’t survey who will be good or evil (yeah you can), he’s asked 100 people (the gimmick of his Family Feud game show) about some of the people in the match. The Mountie is dumb like the Three Stooges, Repo Man is ugly and looks like a girl and the Nasty Boys are only successful because they’re lucky. With that he’s chased off and we’re ready to go.

The Mountie/Nasty Boys/Repo Man vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan/Big Boss Man/Virgil

The good guys clean house with elbows and clotheslines as Heenan plugs some WWF names being on Family Feud. So there’s your cross promotion. Hang on though: SHAWN MICHAELS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING! Monsoon: “WHO CARES?” Well Shawn might. Anyway we settle down to Sags vs. Duggan with Jim firing off some clotheslines. I mean, as much fire as Duggan is going to have.

Slaughter comes in for some clotheslines of his own to Knobbs before dropping to his knees for an elbow to the ribs. What an odd visual. It’s off to Boss Man for a wind up uppercut but he misses a splash on Repo Man. Repo jumps onto Boss Man’s back, shouts ONE MORE TIME, and jumps right into a low blow.

Virgil, with a broken nose, comes in and gets taken down without much effort. Even Heenan is running out of ways to make fun of the people in this match because Virgil is such a joke in the first place. Sags hits a pumphandle slam but Boss Man comes in with a spinebuster as everything breaks down. Some heel miscommunication sees Sags hit Knobbs to give Virgil the pin at 6:28.

Rating: D. Wrestlemania was different back then, which might be the biggest understatement of the wrestling year. This was a house show match to pop the crowd but here it served as a way to let them cool down a bit after the title change. At least it served a purpose, but it feels so out of place on here.

Flair and his executive consultant Mr. Perfect look at the blown up picture of Liz (we can’t see it of course) with Flair swearing it’s real. Ric talks about the bright lights and the big city where Savage will try to reclaim the biggest trophy of them all. After Savage takes the beating of his life, Savage can look up and see the pictures just like everyone else. Then Liz has one more shot at Space Mountain. Perfect: “Can I come along with you this time champ?”

Savage won’t grant interviews.

Since the company doesn’t feel the need to explain the story, the idea here is Flair claimed to have been with Liz before she met Savage. As Savage is completely crazy most days and even worse when it comes to her, this sent him into the rage of all rages and set up the angle after the match was made, which is always odd. Anyway, Flair has promised to show some rather private pictures of Liz, which have only been referenced about a hundred times in the first hour and ten minutes of the show.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ric Flair

Flair is defending and wearing red, meaning he’s likely losing (Look it up. He almost never wins a big match when he’s wearing red.). Heenan instantly says that to be fair to Flair, you have to say that’s a great robe, giving Monsoon one of his best ever WILL YOU STOP’s. Savage jumps Flair in the aisle until Perfect drags him off the champ. Heenan sums things up very well: Savage wants to hurt Flair rather than win the title so things should be going fine for Flair (and Heenan, who was in full on Flair fanboy mode here).

Flair tries an atomic drop and gets his head taken off with a clothesline. A backdrop sends Savage to the floor with one of his trademark great bumps. Savage is already favoring his back so Flair stomps away as Heenan goes into one of the best, longest rants I’ve ever heard him give on Flair not losing. Flair gets two off a suplex (Heenan: “An eighty year old woman could have counted faster than Hebner!”) and the belly to back version is good for the same. A chop takes Savage right back down and Flair drops him back first onto the apron.

Another suplex gets another two as they’ve moved to a rather slow pace. Savage manages to get in a neckbreaker and Heenan needs a drink. The required slam off the top keeps Flair in trouble and Heenan is begging for Flair to do something. I know I’m talking about Heenan a lot in this match but he’s absolutely amazing here. The Flair Flip sends Ric to the top but he dives into a clothesline for two and Heenan….well I think you can figure this one out from here.

Savage sends him outside and hits an ax handle to drive Flair into the barricade. With Flair falling down, we get one of the most obvious blade jobs you’ll ever see (nearly getting him fired in the process). Back in and Savage hammers away with another ax handle getting two. The big elbow connects but Perfect pulls Savage out at two. Thank goodness that wasn’t a DQ or they might have burned the dome down.

Perfect gets dragged in and the referee gets bumped for a few seconds, allowing Perfect to throw Flair an object. That’s only good for two as well so Perfect nails Savage in the leg with a chair. Cue Liz with a host of suits (including Shane McMahon in one of his first on-screen appearances) trying to stop her. Flair goes into his usual leg work routine and the Figure Four goes on. Heenan: “SHOW ME THE PICTURES!”

Perfect grabs the hand so the referee kicks it away, allowing Savage to turn it over and break the hold. A small package gives Savage two (and a GREAT false near fall with the crowd gasping) but Flair goes back to the knee. Savage blocks a right hand though and a rollup (with trunks) gives Randy the title back at 17:58.

Rating: A. I got WAY into this match watching it back and was having a great time with everything. The crowd completely bought into Savage’s quest for revenge with the title just being a bonus prize. All the cheating was great stuff with Savage overcoming all odds, partially due to the inspiration from Liz. The match was even different from the usual stuff with Savage having long stretches of control, which you almost never see in a match like this. Really great stuff here and an underrated classic. If nothing else just listen to Heenan’s commentary.

Post match Heenan bails from the booth and Flair tries to kiss Liz. That earns him a bunch of slaps to the face as everything goes crazy. Perfect takes Savage down and Flair goes after the knee as all the suits are powerless to stop anything. Savage fights up and cleans house before finally being announced as the new champion.

Perfect claims a handful of trunks (accurate) and says that’s not how a macho man would act. Heenan comes in and says there’s nothing to worry about because it’s all on tape. Flair says tonight, a man is going to walk around Indianapolis claiming to be the real World’s Champion and to have the love of Liz. Perfect talks about Savage taking a shortcut, which Flair has NEVER done. Perfect: “Just like his old lady! A cheater!” Ric promises to get the title back and kiss Liz whenever he sees her.

Savage can barely walk and says this isn’t done. Today was just a piece of what Flair has coming to him because he hasn’t been beaten up properly. Flair has somehow made him even madder than he was so it doesn’t matter where it is, but Ric is getting the beating he deserves. Liz isn’t allowed to say if she’s been vindicated as Savage gives her the belt, saying it’s hers. Savage if Flairs though and this is just a piece. GREAT stuff here from Savage who can play the crazed man like few others (and I use the term “play” loosely).

We recap Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan. Hulk had been named #1 contender and Sid wasn’t happy. Therefore he turned on Hogan during a tag match and went on a major rampage, including destroying the Barber Shop set. That was enough to change Wrestlemania as Hogan wanted to fight Sid instead. Hogan has also teased that this might be his last match, which translates to “steroids are becoming a big issue and Hogan isn’t the cleanest looking guy in the world”.

Intermission keeps going with some members of Tatanka’s tribe dancing in the ring.

Rick Martel has some reservations about Tatanka because he’s still outside scalping tickets.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

Yes this is on Wrestlemania as it’s just a different time. Martel knees him in the ribs to start as Heenan issues a statement on it being a matter of time until they get the title back. He lists off all of his jobs in the Flair organization with Monsoon only responding with “YOU’RE A LIAR!” Heenan offers to put em up and Monsoon laughs it off.

Tatanka elbows his way out of trouble and sends Martel shoulder first into the post. A choke takedown drops Tatanka as we’re still waiting on the announcers to acknowledge the match going on. Martel sends him hard to the floor as Monsoon says “Ric Flair” is giving a wrestling lesson right now. Rick heads up but gets crotched, setting up the comeback and a crossbody to pin Martel at 4:31.

Rating: D. Just a filler match here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Today it would be a quick comedy match or something so it’s hard to argue with something being in this spot on the card. Martel feels out of place here, though there’s nothing wrong with having a solid hand like him on the roster. You’re going to get least a watchable match out of him and this did its job, albeit not in the most entertaining way.

Tag Team Champions Money Inc. (Ted DiBiase and IRS with new manager Jimmy Hart) is ready to take care of the Natural Disasters. Hart jumped from the Disasters to Money Inc. and has told them all of the Disasters’ secrets. It’s not a bad idea and it’s not like it’s hard to boo Money Inc.

The Disasters (Earthquake and Typhoon) are ready for revenge and the titles.

Tag Team Titles: Money Inc. vs. Natural Disasters

Money Inc. is defending. IRS starts with Earthquake but bails in very short order as Heenan complains about all the noise here. Some hard shoves send DiBiase into the corner before the champs are rocked with some big clotheslines. After a meeting with Jimmy, it’s IRS getting his arm hammered by Earthquake.

Typhoon comes in for a hiptoss and it’s his turn to get tossed into the corner. Completely one sided so far as Gorilla keeps mocking Heenan over Flair’s loss. Typhoon finally misses a splash in the corner and it’s off to DiBiase. We get an awkward looking sequence where DiBiase doesn’t seem ready to low bridge Typhoon to the floor. No worries though as they do it again a few seconds later (erg) and this time Typhoon goes over.

A double clothesline (somehow to the back of the head as Typhoon can’t even run the ropes properly) sets up a front facelock as this is dying before my eyes. Back up and Typhoon gets in a clothesline for his own for the ice cold tag to Earthquake. Everything breaks down and DiBiase is clotheslined to the floor. Earthquake loads up the Earthquake but IRS is pulled to the floor and it’s an intentional countout to retain the titles at 8:37.

Rating: F. WOW this was terrible and the fans clearly didn’t care. Can you blame them though? Not only was it boring but on top of that it was full of botches and had a house shoe level finish. Just horrible stuff here and in the running for worst Wrestlemania match ever. That’s some rather elite company and I have no idea why they thought this was a good idea.

Brutus Beefcake is here to support Hulk Hogan because Hulkamania will live forever.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

Oh come on GET TO THE MAIN EVENT ALREADY! Skinner jumps him from behind to start and hits a quick shoulder breaker. The reverse DDT gets two on Owen but he skins the cat and grabs an O’Connor Roll to pin Skinner at 1:08. Absolute filler.

Sid cuts off Gene Okerlund, calling him a short, bald headed little oaf. He’s going to destroy Hulkamania once and for all. We go to a sitdown interview with Hogan where he says he’s just not sure if this is his final match or not. Vince, conducting the interview, shakes his hand and thanks him for everything. Sid promises to destroy every Hulkamaniac because he rules the world.

Sid Justice vs. Hulk Hogan

Sid has Harvey Whippleman in his corner. Hogan gets the big entrance and the fans are as into it as they’ve been in a good while but Sid jumps him from behind. In one of the most underrated Hogan sequences ever, he does a mini Hulk Up, punches Sid to the floor, and clotheslines him off the apron to send Sid outside. You can feel the power of Hulkamania and my goodness it works so freaking well all over again.

We settle down to Sid choking and hammering in the corner but Hulk is right back with more right hands. The fans are ALL OVER this and Sid bails to the floor for a minute. Back in and we hit the test of strength with Hogan going down. As the fans all reconsider their place in life, Hogan fights up but gets knocked into the corner. Hogan is in trouble again and gets sent to the floor for some shots to the back from Harvey’s medical bag.

Sid grabs a nerve hold and it looks like Hogan is taking a nap. Sid’s powerbomb sets up Hogan’s fish out of water selling and it’s time for the Hulk Up. Heenan: “THEY’RE BOTH NUTS!” The big boot and a slam (not exactly impressive on Sid) set up the legdrop….for two, as the scheduled run-in was mistimed (on purpose, as the company decided to make Hogan look bad in case it was his last match). Instead Harvey comes in for the DQ at 12:37.

Rating: D-. I know the wrestling is pretty terrible but my goodness some of those Hogan comebacks felt like the old days. The fans helped this one a lot and the opening was just too much to call this a failure. It felt like a house show match and that’s completely unacceptable for a Wrestlemania main event, but at least it had some great moments.

Post match Papa Shango (the scheduled run-in) comes out for the double beatdown but the Ultimate Warrior makes his return after about eight months away for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is all over the place as it goes from very good to horrible all night long. The ending with Warrior returning is more than enough of a combination with the two great matches to make the show work though and really, some of the bad matches are short enough that they don’t mean much. It doesn’t mean much in the long term as this was a VERY weak time for the company, but better times were coming in the forms of Bret and Shawn. For one last hurrah for the old guard though, it worked as a fun show, albeit one that needed a very powerful fast forward button.

Ratings Comparison

Shawn Michaels vs. El Matador

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: B-

Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

2018 Redo: A-

Mountie/Nasty Boys/Repo Man vs. Jim Duggan/Virgil/Sgt. Slaughter/Big Boss Man

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2018 Redo: A

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D

Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D-

2018 Redo: F

Skinner vs. Owen Hart

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2018 Redo: B-

Nothing really out of the norm there and I’ve liked the show every time.

Here’s the original review:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/15/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-8-hogan-who-needs-the-bald-man/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/17/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-viii-show-me-the-pictures/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania VII
Date: March 24, 1991
Location: Los Angeles Sports Arena, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,158
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

In addition to the double main event, we have a match that is going to change wrestling going forward but no one knew it yet. This is a time of change for the company but it was still a very dark period at the moment. We’ll see a lot of the changes on this show, many of which will be better than others. Let’s get to it.

Unfortunately Jesse Ventura is gone from the company. Heenan is great but you can’t replace Jesse and Gorilla.

The opening video is just a quick look at Hogan vs. Slaughter.

Willie Nelson, complete with a replica WWF World Title belt, sings America the Beautiful.

Gorilla brings out Jim Duggan to do commentary on the first match. You know Duggan is happy to be on a show with a theme of Stars and Stripes.

The Rockers are ready for the opening match and aren’t worried about Bobby Heenan at ringside.

Rockers vs. Barbarian/Haku

So much for Heenan finding new members of the Family. Barbarian now has fur trunks, a fur cape and antlers, only one of which he wears during the match. I’ll let you figure out which of them that is. Shawn and Haku get things going with Shawn’s speed not working very well to start. Instead it’s a flying shoulder for two on Haku in a rare display of power from Shawn. Marty comes in to try some tandem offense but Barbarian runs them over with a double clothesline.

The Rockers come back with some dropkicks though and Heenan takes a break for a meeting. Back in and Barbarian uses the power to take over on Marty but Shawn helps his partner with a hurricanrana to take over. They try the same thing on Haku but this time the referee holds Shawn out, allowing Barbarian to come in and snap Marty’s throat across the top.

After another quick beating, Marty gets in a quick cross body for a breather. Barbarian breaks up the tag attempt though and it’s time for the bearhug. Marty fights out but dives off the middle rope and right into an awesome powerslam. He’s still able to roll away from a top rope headbutt though and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and a Marty missile dropkick sets up a Shawn high cross body to put Haku away at 10:33.

Rating: B. This is a perfect opening match as they were in and out of there fast enough but got in almost everything that they needed to do. The Rockers were awesome at this point and Haku/Barbarian were great foils for them with the power vs. speed dynamic. It holds up well and is still one of the better opening matches, especially considering it really doesn’t mean anything but still got the crowd fired up.

It’s already celebrity time as Gene is backstage with Regis Philbin, Alex Trebek and Marla Maples (Donald Trump’s girlfriend at the time). Regis talks about meeting some wrestlers for his talk show and he likes being a guest for a change. Earthquake scares him though. Gene: “Regis, you’re beautiful.” Marla doesn’t have anything of note to say and Alex makes the Jeopardy jokes you would expect him to make.

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Tornado, also known as Kerry Von Erich, is a huge star from Dallas who had more drug problems than should be humanly possible. He’s reaching the end of his very short shelf life already so this isn’t likely to work well. Bravo clotheslines Tornado to the floor before he can even get his robe off but Tornado comes back with a failed claw (his finishing hold) attempt. Tornado ducks some clotheslines but walks into the side suplex for two. A bad looking middle rope chop to the back has Tornado in more trouble but he catches Bravo in the claw, followed by the Tornado Punch (exactly what it sounds like) for the pin at 3:11.

Rating: D-. Not a good match here in the slightest with both guys looking sluggish and not really excited to be out there. This is another filler match, though these are starting to get fewer and further between, at least compared to a few years ago. In your depressing moment of the show, both of these two will be dead in less than two years.

Slick says his Warlord (now bald and without facepaint, making him look far more intimidating) is ready to fix the British Bulldog. The idea is that the Bulldog can’t escape the full nelson.

British Bulldog says he can powerslam the Warlord and his mascot Winston (a dog) says there’s no bull in this Bulldog. So Bulldog can speak canine. That’s quite the low level superpower.

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

This is the solo version of the Bulldog who is even bigger and stronger than he was before. Bulldog starts fast with some hard shoulders to send Warlord outside. Back in and Warlord drops backwards to break up the crucifix attempt as Heenan is already getting on Gorilla’s nerves.

We hit the required bearhug before Warlord opts to just pound Bulldog in the back with heavy forearms. A nice belly to belly nice dropkick to the chest (since when could he jump like that?) followed by a sunset flip for two. Warlord comes back with the full nelson but he can’t get the fingers locked. Just like Billy Jack Haynes four years ago, Bulldog breaks the incomplete hold, followed by a quick powerslam to pin Warlord at 8:11.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here as Warlord was fine as a dragon for Bulldog to slay. This is a good example of a match where they went step by step in a very basic idea but the execution was good enough to make what should have been a disaster into something totally watchable.

Jimmy Hart has his Nasty Boys (Brian Knobbs and Jerry Sags) ready to win the Tag Team Titles. The Nasty Boys were a hot act in WCW in late 1989 so of course the company didn’t bother to sign them to contracts and they were in the WWF in January.

The Hart Foundation say the Nasty Boys are already at the bottom and they’re going even lower.

Macaulay Culkin is here.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Nasty Boys

The Harts are defending. Jimmy Hart is wearing a helmet for reasons that aren’t clear though it might be to protect himself from injury. Jerry and Bret start things off with Hart nailing a Thesz press and some right hands. So that’s where Austin learned it. It’s off to Knobbs vs. Neidhart with Jim going off with forearms to the chest in the corner. We hit the armbar for a bit before it’s off to Bret for right hands to Jerry’s head.

The Russian legsweep (not a neckbreaker Gorilla) sets up the middle rope elbow for two but Knobbs gets in a cheap shot from behind to take over. A hard whip sends Bret into the corner as the announcers debate the main event. Off to a reverse chinlock from Sags before Knobbs comes in for the same hold. Jerry comes in for another one as they’re switching in and out very quickly. Brian hooks his second version but Bret gets up and drops Knobbs onto his back for the break.

The referee doesn’t see the tag though and Bret’s punishment continues. Knobbs hits Sags by mistake though and NOW the tag counts. A quick powerslam gets two on Knobbs and everything breaks down. The Nasty Boys collide again and there’s the Hart Attack to Knobbs but Jimmy throws in the helmet, allowing Sags to knock cold, giving Knobbs the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C+. Simple idea here and a good way to get the titles on the Nasty Boys. They may not have been as polished as the Harts but they’re entertaining brawlers who can put on a good enough match to validate holding the titles. This was it for the Harts as they would amicably split (a rare thing in wrestling) and Bret would be in the singles ranks by the end of the summer.

We recap Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts. Last year, Martel had sprayed the snake bag with cologne but hit Jake in the eye as well, blinding him for several months. Jake was still blind until the new year but he kept going after Martel. Tonight it’s a blindfold match with both guys wrestling under a hood.

Jake says a man has five senses but a snake has six: they always do it better in the dark. That’s a sense?

Rick Martel vs. Jake Roberts

As the hoods are being put on, Jake sticks his hand underneath his, allowing us to clearly see the hole allowing them to see. So much for the gimmick working here. They can’t find each other for the first minute but Martel trips over Jake. Some stuff on the mat goes nowhere so Martel loads up a backdrop, only to have Jake step to the side. There’s your proof that they can see in case the big hole in the hood wasn’t enough for you.

More “blind” searching ensues and they miss charges. Martel finds him for a slam but misses an elbow drop. We’re almost four minutes into this and there’s been about fifteen seconds of contact. The referee gets cornered in the corner but Martel realizes he’s got a shirt in his hands. Jake starts clapping his hands to get Martel’s attention before circling around to catch him. This gives us another ten seconds of contact as the fans want a DDT. I’d settle for a right hand at this point.

Martel finds the snake bag and backs away right into Jake….who still can’t get his hands on him. The bored Gorilla and Heenan do a not very funny bit where Heenan keeps repeating him until a shoulder knocks Jake to the floor. Heenan: “Excuse me for a second. MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR!” Rick gets a chair but hits the post by mistake while Jake is sitting in the ring. Roberts pulls him back in but Martel hits a quick backbreaker to set up the Boston crab. That goes nowhere so Jake grabs him for the DDT and the pin at 8:33.

Rating: F-. This is one of the worst matches in wrestling history, let alone just Wrestlemania. They stumbled around for eight minutes and had less than a minute of “action” in the whole thing. Martel never even cheated. There’s a dozen ways to make this work for a heel but they just did it straight (well as straight as you can do when you see Jake’s hand inside the match at the start) and wasted everyone’s time. Awful “match”.

Post match Jake destroys the cologne atomizer and puts Damien on Rick.

Maples is in Jimmy Hart’s team’s locker room for the Nasty Boys’ celebration. Calamity ensues so she throws it back to Gene, meaning Gorilla.

Jimmy Snuka vs. Undertaker

Here we go. Undertaker is completely different than anything else in the company at this point and probably ever as he plays the character perfectly, walking stoically to the ring while Paul Bearer has this disturbing look on his face. Snuka, now with a mustache and goatee, turns his back on Undertaker and gets beaten down, followed by Undertaker just ripping at his face. Jimmy goes to the apron but gets suplexed back inside. The fans are openly cheering for Undertaker here as Snuka’s offense has almost no effect. The tombstone makes Snuka victim #1 at 4:19.

Rating: D. The match was nothing to see and no one had any idea of what this would lead to. Undertaker was clearly a star from the second he walked through the curtain last year at Survivor Series though and he’s still going twenty five years later. Snuka was the designated victim here, which is the role he had been playing for years.

Notice what Heenan said when Undertaker won: “THAT’S JIMMY SUPERFLY SNUKA!” Yes, the same Snuka who has been living on his reputation for years now. That’s one of the most valuable things you can have on a roster. Snuka never has to win another match and his reputation makes beating him mean something. It’s job security for Snuka and a great way to put over someone young and new. Bad match, good booking.

We recap Savage vs. Warrior, which started over the WWF World Title and is now career vs. career.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Before we get going, Heenan spots Elizabeth in the crowd. I’m sure that’s just a coincidence. Bobby is drooling over Queen Sherri and Savage looks fired up. Warrior actually walks to the ring to really sell how serious this is for everyone. Warrior’s trunks have a picture of the WWF World Title on the back with the words “means more than this” wrapped around it. That’s a nice touch.

Savage gets thrown around to start and it’s time to chill on the floor for a second. Back in and Warrior lifts him up by the throat but he’s still keeping things slow paced. Sherri’s attempt at interference fails and Savage gets tied up in the ropes to continue the beating. Savage finally gets in some offense with a running clothesline as Gorilla compares their careers.

Warrior catches a high cross body in midair but just sets Savage down and slaps him in the face. With nothing else working, Savage throws in a chair but even that doesn’t work as Warrior throws him down again. More stomping has Savage in trouble as we cut to a concerned Elizabeth in the crowd. They’re still in first or second gear and this has been almost all Warrior so far. Savage finally gets smart by avoiding a charge in the corner, sending Warrior crashing down to the floor.

Sherri rakes his back so Warrior casually shoves her down but Savage sends him into the post. A backslide gets two for Savage and he freaks out even more than usual. Warrior runs the ropes and tries a flying shoulder…..while Savage is down on his hands and knees. He deserves to crash and burn as well as the sleeper from Randy. Back up and it’s a double clothesline. This has been a chess match so far and the fans are staying with them every second to make the atmosphere even better.

Sherri’s distraction keeps the referee from seeing a small package and Savage kicks out. Warrior’s shoulder hits the referee by mistake but Sherri comes off the top with a shoe to Savage’s face by mistake. Savage guillotines him across the top rope and drops the top rope elbow. That’s not enough as he goes up top for another one. Savage isn’t done yet as he drops THREE MORE ELBOWS….for two.

Warrior fights up again and hits three straight clotheslines followed by the gorilla press and splash…..for two. Warrior starts talking to his hands and asking if this is his destiny. Savage decks him from behind but his top rope ax handle sends him crashing into the barricade. Randy is out of it so Warrior (“NOW I KNOW!”) throws him back inside for a flying shoulder block, sending him out to the floor again. He does it two more times and Savage is DONE, allowing Warrior to put his foot on the chest for the pin at 20:50.

Rating: A. This was a war and Warrior’s best match by a thousand miles. The crowd hung with them every step of the way here and the drama was amazing. It’s a rare case where words don’t do a match justice and you just need to see it for yourselves. The action is great but it’s the atmosphere that carries the whole thing. This is more than worth seeing if you haven’t caught it before.

Post match Warrior leaves and Sherri explodes on Savage, blaming him for the loss and kicking him when he’s down. Elizabeth jumps the barricade and throws Sherri to the floor as Savage gets up. Savage gets up and turns around…..and is stunned. The referee tells Savage that Sherri was the one beating on him and he has no idea what to do.

Elizabeth opens her arms and Savage hugs her, finally reuniting with his true love who still loved him after he lost everything he had. Savage puts her on his shoulder like he would do in the old days as we see fans crying everywhere. Elizabeth holds the ropes open but he says not this time and holds them open for her for the first time ever, showing that he’s a changed man.

Savage takes one last bow before leaving with the only thing that matters to him. This is one of the most perfect moments to cap off one of the best long term stories the company has ever put together. Also of note: this wasn’t his full on face turn. Savage would do commentary for a few months and was still a heel for a long stretch.

It’s intermission so let’s go to……a debate on instant replay? This is a reference to the NFL debating the issue recently and I have no idea why this is here. Vince moderates the discussion between George Steinbrenner (New York Yankees owner) and Paul Maguire (NFL analyst) over Randy Savage interfering at the Royal Rumble.

Steinbrenner wants the referees fired if they take too much time to make a call and Maguire wants the guys to wrestle. Maguire insults Steinbrenner under his breath and we go to the replay to see if he really did it. The referee are the Bushwhackers (who else?) but they say it’s inconclusive and therefore the play stands. This really, really wasn’t funny and Heenan’s face in his hands sums up the whole thing.

After that, we have a five minute intermission, meaning we just sit around waiting for five minutes. Well it’s better than lame “comedy”.

Gorilla and Heenan preview the rest of the show.

Undertaker measures Regis for a coffin. Regis: “We’re dying out here.”

Demolition, now just Smash and Crush (replacement for Ax) and heels, tells Alex Trebek that only Mr. Fuji (their manager again) has all the answers.

Regis is with Genichiro Tenryu and Koji Kitao, who don’t speak English. He tries Toyota but they think he’s Kathy Lee Gifford.

Jake and Damien freak Trebek out. Damien will have to settle for the home version of Jeopardy. Heenan takes credit for setting the whole thing up.

Demolition vs. Tenryu/Kitao

This is part of a cross promotional deal with Tenryu’s SWS promotion. It’s a brawl to start with Smash and Crush pounding Kitao down to start. Crush drops a top rope ax handle to the ribs as the crowd really isn’t into this as they have no idea who the newcomers are. Heenan thinks Kitao’s first name is Fred as he clotheslines Smash down and makes the tag to Tenryu. Smash rolls away from a backwards top rope elbow and everything breaks down. Kitao breaks up the Decapitator and Tenryu powerbombs Smash for the pin at 4:16.

Rating: D-. The crowd was silent here and it’s really not had to see why. Demolition was WAY past their expiration date and this would be their last match as a team before it was off to the singles ranks. This didn’t work as a match though and the Japanese guys would be gone right after this, never to be seen again save for some one off Royal Rumble appearances for Tenryu.

Heenan leaves to manage Mr. Perfect in the next match and will be replaced by Lord Alfred Hayes.

Big Boss Man is ready to take the Intercontinental Title to complete his revenge on Heenan for insulting Boss Man’s mama. Can you blame him for being mad in that case? Boss Man has run through the entire Heenan Family and only Perfect is left. Again: simple, yet effective. Side note: it really is amazing to see how much weight Boss Man has lost in the last two years. He’s probably down 100lbs.

Heenan and Perfect call Boss Man Barney Fife and reference the Rodney King beatings, which had taken place just three weeks earlier.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man is challenging and knocks Perfect over the top rope with a single right hand. Back in and he swings Perfect around BY THE HAIR. Freaking ow man! Perfect avoids a charge in the corner but gets whipped so hard that he flips forward in a crash. Boss Man whips him with a belt (the referee is fine with this of course) but Perfect wraps the belt around his fist for a shot to the ribs.

We hit an abdominal stretch on the challenger and Heenan tells the timekeeper to ring the bell. The PerfectPlex is countered into a small package for two but a reverse Hennig neck snap (kind of a running Blockbuster) gets two. Perfect is nice enough to go up top for the dive into the raised boot that was clearly designed as a way for him to dive into a raised boot.

Boss Man crotches him against the post but Perfect whips him hard into the steps to take over again. Heenan gets in some cheap shots….and here’s Andre, who is moving better than he has in years. In the distraction, Perfect takes the turnbuckle pad off but Andre hits him in the head with the title belt. Boss Man makes a slow cover but here are Barbarian and Haku for the DQ at 10:14.

Rating: C+. To this day I have no idea why they didn’t change the title here. Boss Man running through the Heenan Family and winning the title should have written itself but they went with the DQ finish instead for some reason. Andre wouldn’t be back after this but it was nice to see him get to do something fun one last time.

Andre helps Boss Man clean house. Boss Man grabs Andre’s shoulders from behind and Andre looks like he wants to kill him.

Donald Trump, Chuck Norris, Lou Ferrigno (the reason Hulk Hogan got his name. They were on a talk show once and Hogan was said to be bigger than the actor who played the Incredible Hulk) and Henry Winkler (who once played a wrestler) are all here. Fonzie just made the show.

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Valentine did a really quick face turn to set this up, despite no one really wanting to see it in the first place. A quick powerslam puts Hammer down but he comes back with some chops in the corner. Heenan, back on commentary, is wondering how Andre could have been here. An elbow to the head staggers Earthquake and a middle rope chop actually puts him down. The Figure Four doesn’t work and it’s the Earthquake Splash for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: D. This is another match that could have been cut out to get the time down a little bit. Valentine is an old standard at Wrestlemania but that doesn’t mean he needs to be getting a match this late in the show in 1991. Earthquake has fallen down the card a bit but he’s still fine for a midcard act.

The Legion of Doom (I’m going to assume you’ve heard of them) blames Power and Glory for their lack of Tag Team Titles. After tonight, they’re going to be sour and gory.

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Power and Glory is Hercules and Paul Roma. Hawk clotheslines them down to start and Roma dives into a powerslam. The Doomsday Device puts Roma away in 59 seconds. Well that worked.

We recap Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase. Virgil FINALLY had enough of DiBiase treating him like garbage at the Royal Rumble. Roddy Piper, recently injured in a motorcycle accident, has been mentoring and coaching Virgil for the match.

Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

Virgil dances around like a boxer to start and punches DiBiase to the floor. Back in and a clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor again but Virgil sends him back inside. They get in again and Virgil takes him to the mat as this is still in first gear. Gorilla and Heenan talk about this being the largest pay per view audience in history (right) as DiBiase chops away in the corner. A piledriver gets two for Ted and a pair of suplexes gets the same. DiBiase remembers that he used to be really evil and shoves Piper down but Piper uses the crutch to low bridge him to the floor to give Virgil a countout win at 7:37.

Rating: D+. This was more of a feel good moment than anything else but it fell really flat with the countout (DiBiase’s third match in a row to end in a countout) instead of DiBiase getting rolled up for a pin. Virgil would pretty much max out here as after this he didn’t have any character and just kind of floated around.

DiBiase beats Virgil down post match and Queen Sherri runs in to become Ted’s new manager. They do a number on Piper’s bad knee but Virgil gets the crutch to make the save. Virgil tells Piper to be a man and get up, just like Piper told him to do multiple times. It’s more bad execution of a good idea.

We look at Sgt. Slaughter and his boss General Adnan (longtime heel manager Sheik Adnan Al-Kaissie) burning a Hogan shirt.

Slaughter and Adnan say Hogan is playing by their rules. We look at Slaughter beating up Hogan and Jim Duggan with a chair as part of these new rules. He might just get himself counted out or disqualified to keep the title. They’ve been teasing this idea all night.

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Mountie is an evil Canadian mounted policeman played by Jacques Rougeau and managed by Jimmy Hart. Tito scores with an early atomic drop and a right hand but a Jimmy distraction lets Mountie get in his shock stick to Tito’s ribs for the pin at 1:20. Nothing but filler. Gorilla: “That will go in the record books as a victory for the Mountie but not for anyone who viewed it.”

Hogan says he has secret weapons to deal with Slaughter’s ground warfare. He isn’t pleased with Slaughter for beating him down and putting him in the camel clutch. Hogan isn’t the same man he was just a week ago but he’s doing it for AMERICA tonight.

Trebek is guest ring announcer, Maples is guest timekeeper and Regis is on commentary.

WWF World Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan is challenging and naturally comes out with the American flag. The champ stalls to start and is content to do so for the first minute and a half. A lockup takes them into the corner and neither can get an advantage. Hulk eventually shoves him down before grabbing a headlock. A shoulder sends Slaughter into the ropes for some of his great selling.

Adnan offers a distraction so Slaughter hits Hogan in the back with a chair for an attempt at a DQ. The referee is fine with the chair but Hogan doesn’t sell it anyway. Slaughter’s thumb to the eye works a bit better but he misses an elbow drop. A forearm to the head gets two for Hulk (how rare is it for him to get a near fall?) and he sends Slaughter chest first into the buckle. Hulk slingshots him into the post and it’s time for some right hands in the corner. This has been almost all Hogan so far.

Hogan actually goes to the middle rope but Slaughter punches him out of the air. That goes nowhere either so Hogan goes all the way to the top (!), only to get slammed right back down. Another chair shot is ignored by the referee so Slaughter chokes with a camera cable. Back in and Slaughter starts in on the back to set up the camel clutch.

First up though is a Boston crab but Hogan is all of three inches away from the ropes. A top rope stomp to the back (that looked dangerous) looks to pin Hogan but Adnan is on the apron for absolutely no logical reason. Try domestic help next time Sarge. There’s a chair to the head and Hulk is busted open, a rare thing at this point. The camel clutch goes on but Slaughter would rather cover him with the Iraqi flag. Of course you know this means war and it’s Hulk Up time. The legdrop gives Hulk the title back at 20:23, making him the first three time WWF World Champion.

Rating: C+. Aside from being the most obvious ending in the world, this was a fine Wrestlemania main event. Hogan winning made sense, even if the Gulf War had been over for about a month at this point. Slaughter was fine for a one off title reign as the turncoat worked well enough. Not a classic or anything but it did exactly what it was supposed to do.

A lot of posing and flag waving take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut out about forty five minutes of filler, this becomes a minor classic. The wrestling is actually quite good here with a fun opener, good title matches and a classic in the middle. There’s still too much filler though and it really drags down what is still a fun show. It also has a much more feel good tone to it and the show felt a lot lighter than the previous years. The wrestling helps carry this one and it’s actually a hidden semi-gem.

Ratings Comparison

Rockers vs. Haku/Barbarian

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

Texas Tornado vs. Dino Bravo

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D-

British Bulldog vs. Warlord

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C-

Nasty Boys vs. Hart Foundation

Original: C-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C+

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2015 Redo: F-

Undertaker vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

Genichiro Tenryu/Koji Kitao vs. Demolition

Original: W (For What were they thinking)

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D-

Big Boss Man vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Earthquake vs. Greg Valentine

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: F+

2015 Redo: D

Legion of Doom vs. Power and Glory

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

The Mountie vs. Tito Santana

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C

2013 Redo: B-

Overall Rating: B-

I’ve always had a soft spot for this show.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/14/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-7-wrestlemania-goes-patriotic/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/16/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-vii-no-that-isnt-a-tear-in-my-eye/

 

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http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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