So this is the latest big screen adaptation of a wrestling story, in this case the wrestling biography of the same name by Jeff Leen (which I have but haven’t read). The film is about the rise of Mildred Burke and is directed by Ash Avildsen, whose father directed Rocky. If you didn’t know that coming in, you will absolutely get the feeling as there is a VERY strong Rocky/Karate Kid style to the film.

I won’t go step by step with the whole thing, but it’s almost a 2/3 falls movie. The first twenty to thirty minutes are a rough sit, as you have stuff like Burke going to a show and having another fan explain the concepts of “heels” and “babyfaces”, which she then uses in a conversation with a wrestler, which the wrestler doesn’t seem to mind. This would be a stretch today but in the 1930s, it would be a one in a billion chance at best and a complete disaster at worst.

After that though, though, settle WAY down and it turns into a much more traditional film, which does get good in a hurry. You see Burke fighting up through the ranks and trying to make women’s wrestling more of a legitimate attraction, plus dealing with her dirtbag husband, who was also her promoter. It feels like a story where you’re seeing Burke trying to become a star and fix her relationships with her husbands/son and bringing in new wrestlers and doing all these other things….and that’s where the problem comes in.

The biggest issue is there is too much going on in the movie and it’s kind of hard to focus on anything. Burke is definitely the centerpiece of the whole thing, but it feels like she’s jumping from one thing to another a lot of the time while still going through the main story. They probably could have done a lot of good by cutting some stuff out, as it basically needs a bit more focus. They throw a lot of information at you and it’s kind of hard to keep track of where things are going, especially if you don’t have a bit of a background in what really happened.

Overall, it is a good movie and you want to see Burke succeed because she’s been through a lot, but the first twenty or so minutes, where a lot of stuff is set up, goes by way too fast. It would have been nice to see things get off to a slower start and build up some more sympathy for her while cutting out some of the things later on. The movie is about two hours and twenty minutes and it flies by, but it gets bogged down at times and that hurts it a bit.

On the wrestling end, there are some things in there that are either flat out wrong or inaccurate, plus some stuff that is WAY out of the timeline (wrestlers tapping out did not become a thing, at least a common thing) until the 90s for example). Some of the stories they tell aren’t accurate in the slightest (someone famous enough to be a name in the movie is shown dying due to the negligence of a promoter but in real life, died at 89), including a cameo which I won’t reveal (but it’s great) where someone says something that is ONLY there as a wink to the audience. Throw in a character saying Scott Hall’s “bad times don’t last but bad guys do” speech and it’s a bit eye roll inducing at times.

There are a lot of cameos, with Naomi, Toni Storm (who plays a fairly important part in the middle), Kamille (who plays a big part) and Britt Baker (who I didn’t actually see), plus Mickie James in a non-speaking (or if she spoke it’s blink and I missed it). Jim Cornette keeps popping up as well and is rather perfect as an old school NWA representative.

If you can find a screening (it’s VERY limited, with only one or two showings a day here), it’s worth a look, though you should also read the book, which goes WAY more in-depth about what happened (the director has said the movie ends with 100 pages left in the book). Definitely cool to see this era though, as Burke is one of the actual pioneers who really did change wrestling forever.

You don’t often get a movie about wrestling and it’s even rarer to have one catering to smarks but that’s what we have here.  It’s certainly low budget but the comedy works and it’s a really easy sit.  You can tell the people who made it put some effort into it and got the idea behind wrestling, which is so important on something like this.  Check it out completely free on Youtube.

And it was pretty fun.

The movie has some big names in it like Kurt Angle, Roddy Piper, Shane Douglas, Jim Duggan and Matt Hardy and it’s EXACTLY what the title sounds like. It’s made well enough to get by and there are enough funny lines (“I’m an icon! Just ask Hogan!”) to make you chuckle a few times. They keep it short at 90 minutes (84 without credits) and it’s a good time. They don’t try to make it anything more than what it should be and that’s the way to go. Check it out if you get the chance.

As a life long Flintstones fan, I’ve been waiting for a very long time for this movie to come out. The Scooby-Doo movie was actually pretty solid for a quick hour and a half sit through, but this is just fifty minutes long. I’m really not sure if this is going to work as well, but I’m going to give a list of thoughts/issues throughout the whole thing. Expect some rare Flintstones fan boy rage in this one. Let’s get to it.

So first and foremost, this thing’s full title is The Flintstones and WWE: Stone Age Smackdown. That’s quite the wordy title, and the movie is only 49 minutes long. At the end of the day though, that’s probably a good thing. This really isn’t very good and didn’t need to be made. There’s a really basic plot (Fred needs money, thinks sports entertainment (not wrestling. Unless I missed it, that word is never used) is an easy way to afford a vacation) and everything is wrapped up really fast. There are only two wrestling shows in the whole thing and less than five matches.

Of course the main thing here is the wrestlers, but there aren’t many to go around. The entire cast from WWE is:

John Cena: a relative of Mr. Slate (which means he’s actually related to Barney if this is cannon) who can throw around dinosaurs.

Rey Mysterio: a guy who works in an office and wears a mask for no apparent reason.

Undertaker: an undertaker, who messes with a tablet a lot.

Bella Twins: two girls from Bedrock. They’re in this about three minutes combined.

Daniel Bryan: just there for a YES cameo.

CM Punk: villain. More on him later.

Mark Henry: Punk’s lackey.

Vince McMahon: owns a raw fish bar. GET IT?

And that’s it. The wrestlers are pretty limited here, and it’s made even stranger by the fact that they’re not wrestlers. They’re just people Fred hires to be in his shows, meaning they don’t know how to wrestle a match. Undertaker and Cena use tombstones at one point but that’s the extent of the wrestling involved.

There isn’t much to the plot and I’ll spare the major spoilers in case you want to see this. There’s only a handful of decent jokes, such as Cena suggesting he take up music and Punk being obsessed with ice cream. The only other scenes that gave me a chuckle were Daniel Bryan and John Cena doing the Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck YES/NO bit (WWE meets Looney Tunes could have some serious potential) and Bam Bam being stronger than Henry.

The characters look really off for the most part, but at least it’s consistent. Wilma’s head is MASSIVE and it’s really distracting. As for the WWE people, Cena looked fine, Vince wasn’t wearing a suit and looks way out of place in anything else, Mark Henry looked homeless, and the Bellas look like they did back in 2008. On the other hand though, they pretty much nailed Undertaker’s look perfectly, save for him wearing pink trunks at one point and spending too much time on the tablet.

For the most part, the wrestlers are just kind of there. Cena does a few things (including having his theme song start playing for no apparent reason), Mysteiro could have been anyone, Henry is a standard lackey and the Bellas are run off by Wilma and Betty. The interesting character though is Punk, who has the only running joke (thinking Barney’s pet Hoparoo is a kangaroo. I didn’t say the joke was funny), bullies Barney and seems to be cruel to animals. I don’t think they were going over the top with him as he’s certainly the closest thing they have to a villain, but it was interesting given what’s happened since he left.

As for the Flintstones stuff, it’s pretty standard, uninspired stuff.  These characters could have been on any given cartoon and you wouldn’t notice the difference. Fred wants money, the girls don’t trust the boys because they know they’ll have a scheme, and that’s about the extent of their involvement. It feels like someone said “put the Flintstones in this” and someone who has watched all of two episodes of the show was in charge of them (to be fair though, you can pretty much understand the main Flintstones characters after watching five minutes of any episode). They’re there, but it’s nothing you haven’t seen before.

Overall, this really is just a thing. It’s not really funny, it’s not really good, and it’s basically just there to say WWE and the Flintstones are doing something together. The Scooby-Doo movie had WAY more effort put in and I had about a thousand times more fun watching it. This pretty much just came and went and only got a handful of chuckles out of me. It’s far from horrible as it’s not even 50 minutes long, but unless you’re a big Flintstones fan, there’s no need to watch it. The wrestlers aren’t enough of a factor to draw in WWE fans and you would be better off watching the Scooby-Doo movie instead.

Oh and one more thing: one of the main jokes in the history of the Flintstones is taking someone with a famous name and adding a rock pun. They’re doing a movie with WWE and no one brings up THE ROCK??? That’s the biggest layup joke you could ever make and there’s nothing there? Come on now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Miz’s movie in case you forgot.
It’s not terrible but I’m probably going to forget I watched it in about 3 days. Miz is the co-star of the movie and is about what you would expect. It’s not like That’s What I Am where they hyped up Orton and he literally wasn’t on screen for five minutes.

The movie is supposed to be a comedy but it’s more of an action movie than funny. The story is an ex-bounty hunter is coming back to New Jersey because the one bounty she ever let get away is back in town. She hooks up with her old team, including ex-boyfriend Miz. She doesn’t want her fiance to know she used to be a bounty hunter and spends half the movie hiding it. The fact that it’s set at Christmas means nothing to the plot at all and this could have been set at any time of the year with no effect on the story.

It’s better than some WWE movies but there’s a reason this is a straight to DVD movie that aired once on cable. The action sequences aren’t bad and the lead girl is good looking.  Miz isn’t bad in it all things considered and he looks fine beating up goons.  It ran an hour and 45 minutes with commercials so it’s not even that long. The movie isn’t terrible by any means but it’s nothing that is going to blow you away or be something you’ll want to watch multiple times.   If you like Miz and not serious action movies you might like this but definitely don’t buy the DVD if you’re just curious.  Rent it or see if it’s ever on TV again at best.