Monday Night Raw – April 25, 2005: Something About The Show Being In England
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw Date: April 25, 2005 Location: NEC Arena, Birmingham, England Attendance: 10,500 Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler
We’re over in England this week for the go home show for Backlash. I’m not sure what to expect this week, but you can probably bet on a slow form HHH promo where he talks about how incredible the Pedigree is. Other than that, we need to get ready for the pay per view, which isn’t the strongest card so far. Let’s get to it.
Here’s Batista to open things up for a change. He’s here to honor a great man who gives his body to the business. That would be Jim Ross, who managed to do last week what it took Batista two years to do: beat HHH. Batista even puts on JR’s hat for a visual which works more than it should. Why didn’t JR tell us that he had wrestling skills? JR beat a ten time World Champion last week and that means a JR chant.
Cue HHH so Batista gives JR his hat back because things are getting serious. HHH talks about how serious this is, so Batista says he’ll defend the title against JR at Backlash instead. Since HHH can’t get a joke, Batista shows us the clip of JR getting the pin last week and raises his hand. HHH’s jacket comes off and the fight is almost on but HHH bails instead. The JR stuff was amusing and Batista needling HHH is always funny.
JR takes over for Coach on commentary.
We recap Viscera helping Trish last week and earning some, ahem, favors, in return.
Viscera and Trish Stratus are out to dinner together, though Viscera has to apologize for being late because he was buying condoms (and it’s about a ten pack). More on this later, thank goodness.
Chris Jericho vs. Sylvain Grenier
Grenier starts fast with a flapjack so Jericho chops away, only to get suplexed right back down for two. The chinlock goes on a minute in, because Grenier can’t go more than a minute without a chinlock. Jericho fights up with some forearms and the bulldog, followed by the enziguri. Conway gets in the distraction though, only to have Jericho slap on the Walls for the fast win. Just a step above a squash but at least they didn’t do anything ridiculous.
Post match the double teaming is on but Shelton Benjamin runs in for the save. Jericho isn’t exactly grateful so Shelton gives him a t-bone. Kind of a mixed message there no? Shelton: “WHO’S YOUR B**** NOW???”
Back at the restaurant, Trish thanks Viscera for what happened last week so orders bangers and mash in a Cockney accent. Viscera tells her that he is a banger who likes to mash, so Trish calls him the horniest guy on the planet. Viscera orders an entire page of the menu.
Christian and Tyson Tomko are in the back when Ric Flair comes in and tells Christian to take care of Batista tonight. Don’t worry though because Christian has this and he doesn’t need HHH’s help. The fans seem rather pleased by this one. A fight nearly breaks out but Tomko gets rid of Flair.
We look at Backlash tickets going on sale.
Here are Christian and Tomko for a chat. After saying Canadians are smarter than Brits, Christian talks about how he won’t have any problems doing what HHH can’t do: beating Batista with a real finisher. Then he’s heading to Smackdown to beating the Ali G ripoff John Cena, because that’s how he rolls. Cue Kane to beat up Tomko as Christian runs off.
Lita can’t wait for Trish to finally get what she deserves.
Christian is hiding from Kane and asks Flair for some help. HHH comes out but rather angrily tells Christian that they can talk business.
And now, the Masterlock Challenge, because it worked so well last week. The money is offered (pounds instead of dollars), the plant is pulled from the audience, and Masters wins. This takes several minutes.
In the back, Coach asks how long it is going to take Shawn Michaels and Hulk Hogan to self destruct. Shawn doesn’t buy it because they have big egos after they’ve done it all. Coach is tossed out and Shawn introduces Hogan, who introduces Gene Okerlund for the formal interview. Shawn talks about looking around the locker room last week and needing someone to fight with him. That’s why he asked about Hogan two weeks ago right?
Hogan talks about the Hall of Fame and the fans wanting one more match. After hanging out with Big Ben and eating some tea and crumpets, he had to give the fans what they wanted and deal with Muhammad and Daivari. So what are you gonna do? Shawn not being able to tear the shirt is funny at least. Just a quick hype interview for the big tag match.
Here are a bunch of Divas with Christy Hemme saying they’re here to party. They call out the ladies of the Daily Star, with Lawler rather approving of their status as Page Three girls. I can get that as they’re rather fetching, but would anyone like to have a match anytime soon? We’re over an hour into the show and we’ve had one match which didn’t even last three minutes.
They’re all here to promote William Regal’s new book (which is incredible) so here he is in person, with Tajiri as a bonus. Regal is at his hammy best here, soaking in the home country cheers and encouraging them a bit. Dancing ensues but here are Hassan and Daivari to cut them off. As Regal’s eyes bug out, Hassan accuses England of being a follower of all things America. Challenge, accepted.
Muhammad Hassan/Khosrow Daivari vs. William Regal/Tajiri
Non-title. Joined in progress with Regal beating up both of them so the villains take a quick breather on the floor. Tajiri comes in for a standing moonsault onto Daivari but it’s quickly off to Hassan to take over on Regal. The slow beatdown ensues as we see a pro Waylon Mercy sign in the crowd. Daivari gets two off a neckbreaker but it’s a collision with Hassan for a double knockdown. Regal kicks Daivari away and the hot tag brings in Tajiri for the rapid fire kicks. The Downward Spiral plants Tajiri though and Hassan knocks Regal down on the floor. Daivari’s guillotine legdrop finishes Tajiri.
Rating: D. And that pretty much ends anything Regal and Tajiri could do with the titles. The best thing that can be said here is that Regal, the hometown boy who has a book coming out and is a champion, didn’t take the fall in this non-title match which could have had any other team putting Hassan and Daivari over. I know the tag division doesn’t mean anything, but I’d love to hear how this was the best solution they had.
Post match the beatdown stays on with no Hogan to make the save, because that interview earlier was backstage in another country.
Back at the restaurant, Trish asks Viscera what his name means. It means inner organs, but his outer organ works just fine. Trish is scared off so she offers to knock Christy Hemme out so Viscera can do whatever to her. As we move past that as fast as possible, Viscera asks her to dance and destroys a tray of dishes by mistake. Viscera: “Uh, check please?”
Edge vs. Val Venis
Edge jumps him before the bell and kicks Venis in the face as we get one of those awesome British chants that I can’t understand. We’re already on the chinlock as the fans switch to a HARDY chant. Val fights up with a hot shot and clothesline as the fans just go away for the comeback. A half nelson slam looks to set up the Money Shot but Edge gets the knees up. The spear finishes Venis.
Rating: D. Just a quick match here and it wasn’t very good. It’s almost strange to see Edge win a regular match like this as Venis could have been anyone here. This doesn’t really do much to set up Edge vs. Benoit on Sunday but it was nice to throw a little curve in there for a change.
Post match Edge puts on a leglock and ignores the chants for Matt. Edge switches to a Crossface for some salt rubbing until Benoit comes in for the save and brawl.
HHH, Christian and Flair come in to see Coach, who is now guest referee. Flair will be guest timekeeper and HHH is going to be Christian’s problem solver as the old trope is brought up again. HHH won’t let Coach call Eric Bischoff to confirm everything.
Viscera and Trish have drinks, with Viscera having some mouthwash (which he swallows). Hang on though as Trish slaps him, saying he gets nothing if he doesn’t destroy Kane first. That’s cool with Viscera, but he wants a little down payment. Trish flashes him and his eyes bug out.
The Diva Search is coming because we’re that lucky.
Christian vs. Batista
Non-title with Coach as referee, Flair as timekeeper and HHH at ringside. Batista isn’t wasting time this week and starts throwing Christian around with ease, including a trip out to the floor. Back in and Batista sends him into the corner for some kicks to the ribs, followed by a heck of a whip into the corner. Batista hits a powerslam but hang on as Coach has to tie his shoe. HHH gets in a low blow and a thumb to the eye as we take a break.
Back with Christian choking on the ropes and getting two off a splash. The chinlock doesn’t last long as JR rips into Coach for general purposes. Christian’s springboard dropkick gets two more but Batista fights up, only to get choked by Flair. Christian sends him throat first into the rope and a neckbreaker gets two.
The comeback is on in a hurry with clotheslines and the powerslam but a Flair distraction cuts him off. Christian gets caught in an electric chair but Coach hurts his shoulder. Batista beats everyone up and tosses HHH, setting up the Batista Bomb on Christian. Coach is out so Batista grabs the hand to slap the mat for three, which counts here.
Rating: D+. It wasn’t quite Austin vs. Love but it did the job well enough. Christian isn’t quite ready to break through the glass ceiling but they would be a little nuts to not send him to Smackdown to go after Cena’s title. The seeds have been planted and it wasn’t going too far to see him in this match.
Post match Batista beats up HHH and Flair but walks into a Pedigree. HHH posts and shouts a lot to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. This was a rather different kind of show and it didn’t work out that well. The wrestling was barely there for the first half and then it became clear that Sunday is just a two match show. The tag match is going to be more about nostalgia and a one time moment while the main event is a rematch from a not great original match. That doesn’t sound like the best show, which is probably why it’s such a forgotten event. Pretty bad show here, but it could have been a lot worse.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
Monday Night Raw – April 18, 2005: New York State Of Awful
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw Date: April 18, 2005 Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York Attendance: 17,258 Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler
We’re less than two weeks away from Backlash and that means things are going to start picking up around here, including what should be a big deal with the show taking place in the Garden. Maybe Batista can get some significant time this week, assuming HHH is willing to let the World Champion in on his time. Let’s get to it.
Jim Ross is in Eric Bischoff’s office where the boss won’t let him out of his match with HHH. As a bit of a reprieve though, the match will be No DQ and Batista can be in JR’s corner. So yes, the World Champion is now playing second fiddle to an announcer facing HHH in the main event. I’m sure you can guess how the match is going to go, but is this really the best usage of the monster champion?
Opening sequence.
There’s no special MSG setup. I miss that thing.
Edge vs. Chris Benoit
Good thing these two are awesome together because they fight a lot. Benoit still has a banged up arm so Edge jumps him on the way in and pounds away. You don’t forearm Benoit in the back though as he’s right back with the rolling German suplexes to rock Edge. The Swan Dive misses though and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Benoit’s back. Thankfully Edge sees the big bandage on the arm and switches to an armbar instead.
That’s reversed into the Crossface but Edge is in the ropes soon enough. They head outside instead and Benoit clotheslines him over the barricade so they can fight into the crowd. It heads into the back with Benoit getting the better of it as the match is thrown out somewhere in there.
Rating: C. This was too short to matter or go anywhere (other than to the back that is) but it was more about setting up some big gimmick match down the line. Edge getting a nice win to really make him feel like a bigger deal is going to help him, as Money in the Bank doesn’t have quite the impact yet.
Referees and Sgt. Slaughter break things up.
Post break the Divas are looking at their swimsuit magazine (as large groups of good looking women do) when Edge and Benoit brawl through a door to break it up. Bischoff comes in to make a Last Man Standing match for next week.
Here’s Trish Stratus for a chat. She wants to talk about what happened with Kane and Lita last week so she would like Lita out here to clear the air. Cue Lita on a crutch and she gets the loudest booing in her career to date. Trish wants to make peace between the two of them but hang on as we pause for the YOU SCREWED MATT chants. After threatening to leave if the fans don’t calm down, Trish talks about how she loves Lita despite what has happened between them. Fans: “WE WANT MATT!”
Lita doesn’t buy it and doesn’t accept her apology. Much like Trish, payback is going to be a b****. The fans don’t react to that so here’s Kane as Lita hits Trish with her crutch. Kane chases Trish up the ramp but Viscera of all people comes out for the save. Crowd: “LET’S GO MABEL!” The Samoan drop and splash crush Kane and Viscera carries Trish off while licking his lips. Oh…..this isn’t going to go well in any form for anyone involved.
Post break Trish thanks Viscera, who puts her up against the wall and makes some, ahem, suggestions about how she can thank him. Viscera: “Glad to be of service, but I’ll be more glad when you service me.” There is talk of mixing business with pleasure but Trish would like to take it slowly. Viscera kisses her anyway and Trish looks rather shaken. Coach: “YOU GO BOY!”
Heart Throbs vs. William Regal/Tajiri
Non-title and oh the Heart Throbs. These two were one of the most over, popular teams that OVW (then known as the Heartbreakers) had ever seen as they were something close to male strippers and had a dancing manager named Mo Green. They came out to It’s Raining Men and the whole thing was so goofy and over the top that they became the hottest thing in OVW. It wasn’t going to work in a big arena or on Raw, but it’s hard not to be a little disappointed after what they did in OVW.
Anyway, they (Romeo and Antonio) dance out and Regal and Tajiri’s stunned looks are great. Romeo dances at Regal to start so it’s off to Tajiri. That means a Crane Kick pose so Tajiri grabs a wristlock to take Romeo down. Antonio comes in but gets taken into the corner for the tag off to Regal, who gets taken into the corner as well. Antonio pounds away at Regal’s back, which has a grand total of no effect. Tajiri comes back in and hammers away until Regal snaps Romeo’s throat across the top. A spinning sunset flip gives Tajiri the easy pin.
Rating: D. So as great as the gimmick is, there isn’t much that they can do once the bell rings. That’s kind of an important part and the lack of skill was on full display here. They’re perfectly watchable but it’s nothing beyond that and it was showing badly. I’ll take this result over the champs losing though so this could have been worse.
Post match the Heart Throbs beat the champs down. I wouldn’t be overly intimidated.
Batista isn’t here and JR is panicking.
HHH has dealt with Batista by talking to the limo company.
Muhammad Hassan doesn’t trust police who look at him strangely. He and Daivari aren’t worried about Hulk Hogan either because Hogan is just another selfish American.
Muhammad Hassan vs. Shawn Michaels
Shawn wastes no time in rushing the ring to start hammering away as the fans are WAY into Michaels here (not surprising). They slug it out and the fans switch over to a HOGAN chant. A running knee lift staggers Hassan but Daivari’s distraction lets Hassan get in his own shot.
Shawn’s back is driven into the apron to slow him down and we take a break. Back with Hassan hitting something like a reverse Eye of the Hurricane for two and commencing to choke. The chinlock goes on for all of a few seconds before Shawn makes the comeback with the usual. The top rope elbow connects but Daivari has to be slammed off the top and the DQ is on.
Rating: D+. Another not great in-ring performance from Hassan but he’s far better than he was a few months back. Having him against the bigger names helps a lot, though there is only so much that can be done when he doesn’t have the best matches. If they can figure out a way to mix up his promos a bit he could be a big deal, but for now it’s just a slow improvement.
Post match the beatdown is on until Hulk Hogan comes in for the save to blow the roof off the place. Posing ensues with Shawn wearing Hassan’s head cover. This goes on for a good while, but the reaction makes it worth it.
It’s time for the Masterlock Challenge with Chris Masters putting up $1000 cash to anyone in the crowd who can break his full nelson. The fan, named Roman, comes in and says he’s tough because he’s from New York. This goes exactly as you would expect it to.
Shelton Benjamin vs. Simon Dean
Non-title. Dean’s pre-match promo is broken up by Shelton’s entrance, which is probably best for everyone. Before the match, we get a clip from last week with Chris Jericho saying Fozzy’s new single is called Shelton Is A Little B****. Cue Jericho to say that he gets a title shot at Backlash, but he has something a little better. Jericho brings out Fozzy’s guitarist and actually performs Shelton Is A Little B****.
As the song goes on, Simon jumps Shelton from behind and goes up top, with the referee ringing the bell just before a top rope clothesline. What kind of a nitwit thinks that’s a fair start to a match? The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by some stomping for good measure. Shelton fights up and hits a northern lights suplex for two to start the comeback. The Stinger Splash and exploder finish Dean in a hurry.
Rating: D. Oh come on, what could they have done to follow up on that song? Jericho stole the show here, as usual, and Shelton getting beaten up by Dean wasn’t the most thrilling idea in the first place. Shelton vs. Jericho should be good and I can go with the story, though I’d prefer more of that song.
Smackdown Rebound.
Here are Christian and Tyson Tomko for a chat. Christian wants a Hulk Hogan style reaction…and here’s Vince McMahon, who can power walk to the ring three months after tearing both quads because of course he can. Christian knows that Vince is here to congratulate him after last week, but Vince agrees with Steve Austin: Christian is a CLB.
Vince wants to announce the return of a big idea but Christian cuts him off, saying that we know about the return of the Diva Search. That earns him the threat of unemployment, followed by the announcement of the return of the Draft in about a month. Christian likes the idea and thinks he should be sent to Smackdown to challenge John Cena. Vince thinks Christian belongs in the main event too, so next week he can face Batista.
Backlash rundown. That card has come together out of nowhere.
HHH promises to hit Batista with the Pedigree and get the title back at Backlash. Tonight, JR gets to find out what the Pedigree means. We get a video on the Pedigree and I have to wonder how long HHH has had this waiting.
Jim Ross vs. HHH
No DQ and no Batista as this is going to go badly. They stare at each other a bit with HHH offering a handshake, with Lawler knowing where this is going. A right hand to the stomach finally gives us something and it’s the slow beating, until JR manages to get in a shot to the face. HHH knocks him down again and yells at the referee as JR is busted open. Lawler says this isn’t fair as HHH has been World Champion more times than you can count. I think I can count to ten man.
JR loses his Oklahoma jersey and the slow beating continues as the crowd is just gone. Lawler has finally had enough (he must have gotten sick of the counting) and goes to the ring, which draws Ric Flair in as well. That earns Lawler a Pedigree of his own but here’s Batista’s limo (with Batista driving) to make something happen. Batista comes in for the save and counters the Pedigree, setting up a chair to HHH’s head. JR is pulled on top for the pin.
Rating: F. Well that was bad. What was the point of this supposed to be? Making it clear that HHH is an evil villain without making him have an actual match? I guess JR pinning him is supposed to be humiliating but it’s not like Batista beating HHH Up, especially with a chair, is that big of a deal. This should have been about two minutes long instead of eleven and, again, Batista gets a limited reaction because he doesn’t show up until the end of the show and the fans are dead from the bad match. What a great way to push the new champ.
The mild celebration ends the show.
Overall Rating: D-. What an awful show with the Heart Throbs being one of the highlights. The only decent match was Edge vs. Benoit, which was there to set up another match in the future. I don’t know if they were messed up because they were heading to Europe soon or what but this was a disaster on almost all grounds. Backlash is looking ok enough, but they need a much better TV show next week if they want it to have a chance. Horrible show here and one of the worst in a good while.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
Monday Night Raw – April 4, 2005 (2019 Redo): Before It Became A Thing
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw Date: April 4, 2005 Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California Attendance: 16,653 Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
It’s the show after Wrestlemania and that means that means it’s time for the season premiere. Batista won the Raw World Title last night and hopefully changed things for a long time to come around here. We’ve seen the HHH show for so many years now and last year’s summer break with Chris Benoit on top didn’t really change anything. Maybe Batista can do a little better so let’s get to it.
We open with a nice long Wrestlemania recap video, cut together with the Gladiator trailer. That’s how the show should start.
And here’s HHH because the guy who lost the title is more important than the person who won the thing. HHH takes his sweet time talking and doesn’t like the BATISTA chants. He finally admits that he lost the title last night but rest assured that this is NOT the beginning of the Batista Era because Batista was great for one night. HHH is great every night so the title will come back to him. He’ll get his rematch, presumably at Backlash, and take the title back. At least it was short.
Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin
Benjamin is defending and they’re all banged up. Christian tries to talk some trash to start and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Shelton isn’t sure who to go after so he knocks Christian down as well, only to get in an argument with Jericho over who gets to beat Christian up in the corner. Those are fighting actions to Jericho, who sends Christian outside and punches Shelton in the face.
Shelton’s crossbody gets two so Jericho bulldogs him down. Christian breaks up the Lionsault though and takes Jericho’s place, setting up a neckbreaker for two on Shelton. Jericho gets knocked off the apron and we hit the chinlock. With that going nowhere, Christian goes up top but the other two are right there for a Tower of Doom to put them all down.
Jericho enziguris Christian and grabs the sleeper drop on Shelton for two before rolling them both up at the same time for two more. Shelton is back up with a Stinger Splash for two on Christian with Jericho making a save. The exploder hits Jericho but Tomko pulls Shelton outside for a kick to the face to give Christian two. The Walls have Christian in trouble (Lawler: “DON’T TAP CAP!”) but Shelton springboards in with the bulldog to pin Jericho and retain.
Rating: B. I might have to raise the rating a bit just for DON’T TAP CAP. This was rather energetic with all three working hard and hitting their big stuff with a rather creative finish. You can’t just have people do their finishers all the time so throwing in a surprise like this is a welcome change. Shelton has been champion for a long time now and he’s gone from a surprise winner to an established guy as the title has done a lot for him, as it’s supposed to do.
Edge signs his Money in the Bank contract so Eric Bischoff is ready for the title match tonight. That’s not happening because Edge is saving it for later. This annoys Bischoff, who gives Edge a match with Chris Benoit instead.
Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. Orton says it wasn’t supposed to happen like it did because he came THIS close to making history. He even countered the chokeslam into the RKO but that wasn’t enough. That’s why he tried the Tombstone but he felt something snap in his shoulder and then he was looking up at the lights.
Then he was in the back, looking up at the monitor and seeing Batista as the new World Heavyweight Champion. That was different because he respects Undertaker but knows he’s better than Batista. This year alone, Orton has pinned Batista twice so tonight, he’ll do it a third time. Bischoff comes out to say it’s on, though non-title because HHH and Edge are already lurking around the next shot.
Women’s Title: Christy Hemme vs. Trish Stratus
Trish isn’t defending because she kicks Christy in the head before the bell. She knocks Lita down as well and attacks the bad knee again, all with the big grin on her face.
We see the full Eugene/Muhammad Hassan/Hulk Hogan segment from last night.
Gladiator trailer.
Here’s Shawn Michaels, limping down the ramp, for a chat. He has only had two loves in his life and those are his family and wrestling. Last night he gave it everything he had but couldn’t get it done. With that being said though, he has a question: would anyone like to see a rematch? The fans seem interested and that’s what Shawn was hoping to hear. He doesn’t know when, where or how it would happen but he’ll do whatever he can to give the fans what they want.
Cue Muhammad Hassan and Daivari to interrupt though and this isn’t likely to go well. Daivari rants a lot as Shawn sits on the top rope and doesn’t quite understand. Hassan switches to English and talks about Hogan returning last night before Shawn came up short in failing to steal the show. Instead Shawn tapped out and left as a disgrace in losing.
That’s enough to get Shawn’s jacket off so Hassan goes into his usual spiel. He accuses the fans of loving losers so Shawn punches him in the face so the fight is on. Daivari distraction lets Hassan get in a chop block though and the beatdown is on, including the camel clutch (instead of something on the leg). Shawn sells the heck out of the beating.
Edge vs. Chris Benoit
Benoit’s arm is badly damaged after last night. Feeling out process to start with Benoit having to keep the bad arm away. The snap suplex and a back elbow put Edge down but he gets in a shot to the bad arm. That’s enough to send Benoit outside for a breather, though he’s fine enough to send Edge into the barricade.
Back in and Benoit makes the mistake of using the bad arm and has to go outside again. Edge manages to snap the arm across the top rope and it’s time for some pulling on said arm. The armbar goes on and Benoit can’t even slam his way out of it. Benoit finally flips his way out and drops Edge but makes the mistake of trying the Swan Dive.
The crash is enough for Edge to get two and he baseball slides Benoit to the floor where he lands on the arm as we take a break. Back with Benoit’s arm in another (albeit different) armbar with the bandage having been pulled off. Edge gives up on that and goes up top, where Benoit chops away with the good arm.
Benoit’s top rope superplex brings him back down in a good looking crash. The Sharpshooter goes on but Edge makes the rope, so Benoit tries the Crossface. Benoit’s arm is WAY too hurt for that to work though and Edge takes him down with a flying armbar. The spear hits corner though and Benoit grabs a rollup for the pin.
Rating: B. They had a good story going here and you know the action is going to be more than enough to carry these two to something great. That’s exactly what happened here with Benoit fighting through the adversity and surviving until the end. Edge losing isn’t going to hurt him that much either as he has the briefcase for a long time and can absorb a loss here or there.
Post match Edge jumps Benoit and sends him into the steps before crushing the bad arm with a chair. JR is VERY furious about this, while Lawler says it’s like the toaster you get when you open a new bank account. All I got was a bank book and a debit card.
Here are Simon Dean and Maven for a chat. They’re not impressed by the Los Angeles fans because all they want to do is eat nachos and drink beer. That’s not healthy and Simon defies anyone to tell him otherwise. Cue the glass shatter and here’s Steve Austin to an eruption. Austin isn’t impressed with all of these products and doesn’t like someone putting down beer drinkers. After insulting their hair, Austin offers Simon a beer, which Simon will drink…if it’s low calorie.
They make a deal: Simon will drink a beer if Austin will drink a Simon Shake. Simon gets the beer but asks if Austin has a glass. After taking a few sips, it’s time to do some pushups to work off the calories. Austin makes him do a lot more before trying the shake, which he says tastes like garbage. Maven says it’s a man’s drink and throws it on Austin. Fans: “YOU F***** UP!” They’re right, as the beatdown is on and beer is consumed. Fine use of Austin on a show like this.
Kane comes up to Orton in the back and laughs at him for not being able to beat Undertaker.
Randy Orton vs. Batista
Non-title. Orton’s headlock works as well as you would expect so he takes Batista into the corner for some right hands. They head outside with Batista being sent into the steps as this isn’t exactly a great showcase of the new World Champion. Back in and Orton grabs a chinlock for a good while before Batista manages to fight up. The corner shoulders have Orton in trouble and his bad shoulder is sent hard into the post. Batista posts it again for good measure and it’s the spinebuster/Batista Bomb to finish Orton. That would be his last match until August.
Rating: D. What was that? Orton gets to beat him up for four minutes and then loses to the double finisher? We wait for an hour and forty five minutes to finally see the new champ and he gets beaten up for most of the match? Orton is on his way to the injured list for a good while and this is the spot they put these two in? I’m not sure I get this one.
HHH comes out to glare at Batista and signal that he wants the title to end the show.
Overall Rating: B-. This is before the post-Wrestlemania Raw became a bigger deal and that left us with a pretty energized show. What we got was a show was some good wrestling but little in the way of storylines. Other than HHH vs. Batista continuing, there wasn’t a lot going on here. That’s ok for a show like this though and what we got was certainly entertaining. Good show, and we can start everything that matters next week.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
Monday Night Raw – February 14, 2005: The Last Stop
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw Date: February 14, 2005 Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio Attendance: 7,500 Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
We’re back in America but the show is in a bit of a weird place at the moment. It’s the last show before No Way Out, meaning the last show before we can officially begin the Road to Wrestlemania. The fans are chomping at the bit to see Batista finally snap and turn on HHH but we need to go through the motions of acting like Batista might go after JBL instead. The inching forward continues tonight so let’s get to it.
Here’s Chris Jericho in a mock New York Rangers jersey to open things up with the Highlight Reel. The guest this week is Candice Michelle, who is very popular at the moment due to her Go Daddy commercial from the Super Bowl. Jericho talks about all the attention she has been getting since the commercial but Candice doesn’t know what the big deal is about. She teases dancing a bit here and suggests a wardrobe malfunction might happen.
Jericho freaks out over the idea of a bare shoulders. Candice takes her shoulder straps down, giving us a GREAT CAESAR’S GHOST from Jericho. Cue Muhammad Hassan though and Jericho doesn’t seem pleased. The fans give him a USA chant and Hassan calls it hypocrisy. Not the fans chanting USA to an Arab American and proving his point, but Candice being cheered while he received no accolades for beating Sgt. Slaughter. This is part of the dumbing down of America and Jericho is the poster child of stupidity (I’m having Dean Douglas flashbacks).
Jericho thinks they have a lot in common. See, Hassan and Daivari are Arab Americans and he is the Ayatollah of rock and rollah. Daivari rants and points but Jericho doesn’t play on that side of the fence. Jericho has seen the way they look at each other and gets the idea: Daivari is Hassan’s special Valentine! The match is on after the break.
Chris Jericho vs. Muhammad Hassan
Joined in progress with Hassan getting dropped with a belly to back suplex followed by a regular one for the arrogant two. The Walls attempt doesn’t work so Jericho hits a springboard shoulder to knock him off the apron. A Daivari distraction lets Hassan get in a backbreaker though and it’s time to start in on the ribs. It’s kind of amazing how much easier Hassan is to watch when he’s in a match that might mean something.
The shots to the back are cut off with a spinwheel kick and Jericho hits the running crotch attack to the back. The Flashback looks to finish Hassan but Daivari has the referee. That earns him a springboard dropkick, but the distraction lets Hassan hit the Downward Spiral for the pin.
Rating: D+. I said it was easier to watch but that doesn’t make it good. Hassan’s matches just don’t have many good qualities to them and when the promos are the exact same thing every week, he’s just not going to get very far. I know WWE thinks this is the best idea they’ve had in a good while because it ties into the real world news of the moment, but it’s really not working because they’re not letting it go beyond the stereotypical characteristics.
HHH is ready for a fight because JBL is on his way here to confront Batista. Ric Flair goes to tell Batista and HHH is upset because this is an insult to Evolution.
Announced for the Hall of Fame: Roddy Piper. He has to be there.
Randy Orton talks to Stacy Keibler and she calls him trouble. Stacy asks him if he’d like to do something after the show and Orton is down. These two have less chemistry than an English class.
Flair interrupts Batista flirting with Maria and doesn’t care about JBL showing up. That’s cool with Flair, who says if JBL becomes too big of a problem, Batista can just beat him at Wrestlemania. Batista hasn’t made his mind up yet but he will next week. As for tonight though, Batista wants HHH to stay out of it with JBL. He’s smart, looking intimidating and has a backbone. More reasons why he got over as much as he did.
Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Gene Snitsky
Benjamin is defending and kicks away to start, setting up the Stinger Splash in the corner. Snitsky kicks him down though and we hit the chinlock, which doesn’t last very long. A middle rope elbow misses Shelton and JR goes into a rant about Piper having the character to go into the Hall of Fame.
Shelton hits a great looking top rope clothesline for two as a fan holds up a Jay Mariotti Fears Woody Paige sign (ESPN fans might get that one). Snitsky’s pumphandle powerslam is broken up so he kicks Shelton in the face for two instead. That means some yelling at the referee, followed by a nasty chair shot to the head for the DQ.
Rating: D. Well it’s better than watching Shelton vs. Maven all over again. Benjamin is still one of the smoothest performers in wrestling and someone who can make anything he does look great. Snitsky is fine as a monster and just getting him away from Kane is a huge improvement. The rematch won’t be great but at least there’s a story to get us there.
Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. William Regal/Tajiri
Regal and Tajiri are defending after having won the titles last week. Conway punches Regal to start and it’s quickly off to Grenier for a headlock. Since it’s just a headlock, Tajiri comes in for some kicks (which look good as always) to take over. Conway tries to come back in to draw Regal in as well, allowing a neckbreaker from behind to take Tajiri down. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Tajiri fights up and hits the handspring elbow. Regal comes back in and it’s forearms a go-go, plus the knee trembler to finish Conway and retain the titles in a hurry.
Rating: D+. They really need to get away from La Resistance now as they’ve been beaten so many times that the value is gone. I know that means they need to build up some new challengers and that isn’t their strong suit, but they need to do something fresh. Regal and Tajiri don’t feel like long term champions and Tajiri is just Eugene’s replacement, but there is no one who is taking the titles at the moment.
Randy Orton vs. Christian
They’re not wasting as much time with backstage stuff this week. Tyson Tomko is out with Christian, who shoves Orton to start and gets punched in the face. That means more right hands on the mat as Orton is keeping it simple here. A headlock keeps Christian in place and Orton does it again as they seem to have some time for this one. Christian gets back up and chokes in the corner but takes too much time slapping his chest, allowing Orton to punch some more.
Tomko’s distraction doesn’t work as Christian charges into another right hand but Christian finally gets a backdrop to the floor. That lets Tomko make up for his general ineptness with a whip into the steps as we take a break. Back with Tomko having been ejected and Christian (sporting a big welt on the side of his head) grabbing a chinlock. A dropkick and neckbreaker get two each and it’s the chinlock sequel. The reverse DDT gets two more so Christian steps on his head in frustration.
You don’t do that to someone so Orton whips him chest first into the buckle and they’re both down. Orton’s comeback is on with a dropkick and backdrop, plus a long series of forearms to the chest. The great looking high crossbody gets two but Christian dodges a charge to send him into the post. Christian goes for the buckle so here’s Tomko for a big boot to give him two. Orton’s backbreaker sets up a failed RKO attempt, so Orton leapfrogs over him and hits the RKO for the pin.
Rating: B. These two have always worked well together and Christian is getting something out of these matches. It’s the kind of push where he might not be winning but he’s establishing that he can hang with top stars. That and the still funny promos are going to make him a bigger star and the push is seemingly waiting in the wings.
Eric Bischoff is on the phone with Theodore Long, who he accuses of sending JBL here. That’s fine with Eric because Batista will deal with JBL just fine. Edge comes in to complain about everyone talking about Batista. Last week, Batista cost him the world Title and tonight Edge is going to beat him again. Then JBL can come in and beat Batista up so Batista will sign to face JBL at Wrestlemania. Bischoff thinks that’s unlikely but lets Edge go on. If Edge wins, he should get the World Title shot at Wrestlemania. Bischoff doesn’t say anything, as the logic isn’t strong with this one.
Video on the Japan tour.
Here’s Trish Stratus for a chat. Last week during the Divas fashion show, she realized that the new women are trying to steal her spotlight. It doesn’t matter if you’re Brittney Freaking Spears, no one is doing that to her. Trish wants Christy Hemme out here right now because the Women’s Champion wants to say something. Christy comes out with JR praising her personality. Lawler: “THAT’S WHAT YOU NOTICE ABOUT HER???”
Trish brings up a word that the fans used to chant at her, which starts up all over again because there is strong power of suggestion in wrestling. That word (s***) is Christy’s now because she has agreed to pose in Playboy. Christy is giggling with pride and thinks people will want to see the magazine. That doesn’t make the chant apply to her though. Sleeping with half the locker room like Trish does though. A big slap drops Christy as WWE’s inability to go a few months without a women’s storyline involving sex amazes me.
We look back at the end of last week’s show with Batista costing Edge the World Title match.
Kane vs. Simon Dean
Before the match, Simon nearly cries about how his career is probably about to end. Worry not though, because he will continue to produce the Simon System. If you don’t believe in him, he sentences you to a life of obesity! Kane is tired of listening and starts the stalking so Dean hides behind the referee. A glare at said referee allows Simon to throw powder in Kane’s eyes. Kane doesn’t mind and kicks him in the face as the pain is imminent. The chokeslam is loaded up but Kane stops for some pushups. Now the chokeslam can finish Dean in a hurry.
We look back at the videos from JBL and Big Show, which don’t please Batista.
Earlier today, Coach annoyed Shawn Michaels (who looks weird in a suit) about Kurt Angle bragging over what happened at the Royal Rumble. Shawn suggests Angle focus on his match at No Way Out, even though Shawn has some incredible talent of his own.
HHH asks Batista about JBL. Batista wants to handle it himself but HHH says this is about all of Evolution. Tonight, Batista can worry about Edge and HHH will deal with JBL. Batista leaves and HHH says he has his back.
Chris Masters is coming.
Batista vs. Edge
HHH is at ringside. Edge’s headlock is broken up by Batista just lifting him into the air and it’s time to hammer in the corner. They head outside with Edge grabbing an Edge O Matic on the floor for a rather sick thud. Back in and Edge chokes on the rope, followed by a neckbreaker for two.
We hit the cravate for a bit until Batista powers up with a World’s Strongest Slam. A shoulder looks to set up the spinebuster but Edge reverses into the Edgecution. The spinebuster cuts off the spear and the Batista Bomb connects….as JBL’s limo arrives. HHH comes in and shoves the referee down and that’s a rather abrupt DQ.
Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and the ending was just there to protect both guys. That was about the only option they had other than Edge walking out so I can live with the lame DQ for a change. Batista and JBL isn’t likely to happen but it’s a box they need to check off before we can get to a bigger story.
Post match Flair waves Batista and HHH to the back with HHH saying this is about Evolution. Batista says it’s about him vs. JBL but here’s the limo to try and run Batista over. HHH shoves him out of the way as the limo drives off. Batista is ticked off and promises to go to Smackdown on his own to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. The holding pattern continues and there is only so much that Orton vs. Christian could do to save the rest of the show. That being said, this is pretty definitively the last show before we get to the stuff that really matters. Wrestlemania is coming and it’s going to be all about Batista, which is exactly what the fans want. The contract signing next week is going to change everything and it’s time to get things moving. This show wasn’t good, but it’s not like that is going to matter beyond next Monday.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXI: The Modern Era Begins
Wrestlemania XXI Date: April 3, 2005
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 20,193
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz
We’re at the launch of a new era in WWE as Batista and Cena are ready to take over the company as the next generation of top stars. They’re challenging HHH and JBL tonight in the respective title matches in what really are company altering matches. On top of that we’ve got Angle vs. HBK and the first MITB match, making this a PACKED show. The theme tonight is Wrestlemania Goes Hollywood which means we get some outstanding parody film trailers. Let’s get to it.
Lillian Garcia (looking GREAT in a baby blue outfit which shows off her flat stomach) sings America the Beautiful.
The Wrestlemania 21 logo is revealed.
We get a montage of the trailers (HHH as Braveheart, John Cena/JBL from A Few Good Men, Undertaker as Dirty Harry, Eugene as Forrest Gump and many more. Look these up) set to Behind Those Eyes by 3 Doors Down.
We get the final trailer which is Gladiator with Steve Austin as Russell Crowe.
Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero
They’re tag team champions but fighting to see who is better here as Eddie is getting frustrated by Rey unintentionally showing him up. Rey is in a Mexican/American double flag themed outfit here instead of his usual superhero stuff. Rey immediately starts adjusting his mask which will be a recurring theme tonight. Eddie takes him to the mat with a headlock and Rey is already messing with his mask.
An armdrag puts Mysterio down and Eddie grabs a test of strength grip. Back up and Rey tries a sunset flip, only to be catapulted out to the floor. Eddie slides out but Rey slides back in, only to miss a 619 to the floor. Back in and they grab another strength grip before Eddie flips Rey over. The referee counts and they bridge up at the exact same time in a cool visual.
Rey is backdropped but lands on his feet, only to have to adjust the mask again. Eddie is backdropped now and tweaks his knee in the process. Rey is knocked to the floor though and there’s a plancha by Guerrero to take him out. Back in and Eddie cranks on the arms a bit before suplexing a mask fixing Mysterio down for two. Guerrero hooks a surfboard submission but has to leg it go because his own shoulders were down.
Off to an STF on Rey which shifts into an armbar. Eddie tries a powerbomb but gets armdragged out to the floor instead. A BIG corkscrew dive to the floor keeps Eddie down as does a seated senton back inside. Back up and Eddie tries Three Amigos but gets rolled up for two instead. There’s a backbreaker for two on Rey followed by Three Amigos but Guerrero tries a fourth and is sent into 619 position.
Eddie pops up and hits another backbreaker for two, causing his frustrations to start coming out. Three more Amigos set up the Frog Splash but Rey gets out at the last second. Naturally, Rey adjusts his mask. La Majistral gets two for Mysterio and there’s the 619 to send Eddie sprawling across the ring. The West Coast Pop is countered into a powerbomb for two and Eddie isn’t sure what to do. Instead of following up though, Eddie gets caught in a standing rana for the pin out of nowhere.
Rating: C+. This was a disappointment. At the end of the day, these two didn’t live up to the expectations they had set, especially given their masterpieces back in WCW. They never got out of first or even second gear and that really brought things down. The match felt like they were trying to have a masterpiece and they collapsed under the weight. It was ok, but it could and should have been SO much more.
Eddie doesn’t turn on Rey after the match. That would come later.
JBL and Orlando Jordan bump into HHH and Flair. JBL says that he’s never lost the world title like HHH has and HHH is going to add another loss to his total tonight. A showdown is teased but everyone backs down.
Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider are here.
Edge vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Benoit vs. Christian vs. Kane
This is the first ever Money in the Bank ladder match and thankfully there are only six people instead of the eight that we usually get today. In a cool visual, Kane’s fire engulfs a bunch of ladders on the stage before everyone else attacks him to start things off. Kane goes for the ladder but everyone jumps him to stop him from getting any weapons. Benjamin and Benoit hit a double suplex on the Big Bald and there’s the opening bell.
Jericho hits Christian in the face with the first ladder and it’s Jericho vs. Benjamin in the ring. The bulldog takes Shelton down but Jericho has to dropkick Edge and Benoit to the floor. A slingshot plancha takes Edge down again Christian dives on all three other Canadians before Shelton dives onto all four of them. Kane goes up top and takes out a bunch of guys as well before pulling out the first ladder.
Before Kane can climb though he has to knock down everyone else, only to have Jericho dropkick him down. Jericho gets the ladder and crushes various people with it before dropping the ladder onto Edge. Benoit grabs Jericho for a German suplex though to send him flying before Benoit tries to climb up. Kane makes a save but gets caught in the Crossface instead. Now there’s a Crossface to Edge but Kane breaks it up with a ladder shot to Benoit’s chest.
Kane follows that up by crushing Benoit’s arm with the ladder, only to be speared by Edge. Edge and Christian stare at each other before crushing Kane between some ladders. Shelton takes both former partners down with a springboard clothesline before trying the Dragon Whip on Edge but kicking the ladder into Christian instead. Edge whips Shelton into the ladder but the spear hits the ladder instead of Benjamin. A Stinger Splash against the ladder crushes Edge and it’s time for a climb.
It’s Jericho and Benjamin up on the ladder but here are Christian and Benoit on their own ladder. Edge climbs a third ladder before Christian hits a DDT onto Benoit’s arm to pull him down to the mat. Jericho is knocked down as well and Shelton hits the T-Bone Exploder off the ladder to crush Edge yet again.
Now we have two ladders set up, one of which set up like a ramp to reach the standing ladder. Jericho climbs up but Benjamin runs up the ladder ramp and clotheslines Jericho off the top and out to the floor. Shelton climbs up but Christian hits him in the ribs with a ladder to put him down again. Christian’s problem solver Tomko comes in now and sets up a ladder for his employer to send Christian to the top. Kane comes back in and fights both guys off before shoving Christian off the ladder off the ladder and out onto Tomko on the floor.
Jericho and Kane both go up and both crash down almost as fast. With one good arm, Benoit comes back in and tries to load up a ladder, but being the psycho that he is, he hits the Swan Dive on Kane instead of going for the case. Now Benoit goes up and rams his head into Kane to send him down (much scarier now than it used to be) but Edge hits Benoit in the bad arm with a chair and climbs up to become the first Mr. Money in the Bank.
Rating: B+. This was the spiritual successor to TLC and having it be every man for himself made it all the better. It worked very well with six men instead of the eight that it would become, making this one arguably the best overall. Very fun match and the spots were still crisp and fresh. Good stuff here.
Here’s Eugene who is still almost kind of popular at this point. Eugene talks about the midget match from Wrestlemania 3 when the midgets attacked King Kong Bundy because he’s so excited to be here. This brings out Muhammad Hassan and Daivari who don’t like being mistreated by Americans because they’re Arab Americans. Hassan makes fun of Eugene and goes on a rant about being left off of Wrestlemania.
He complains about Hollywood being phony before Daivari yells at Eugene too Hassan decks a still injured Eugene and putting him in a camel clutch. We need a savior here and it’s HULK HOGAN walking down that aisle! The arena, in a word, loses it. Daivari and Hassan jump him but it’s a double noggin knocker for those meanies. Hogan punches Hassan down and chops away before booting him down. Hassan is sent flying and Daivari hits Hogan in the back with a chair. That has absolutely no effect and there’s the big boot for Daivari’s troubles. Hogan stands tall and it’s time to pose. As in for nearly five minutes.
We recap Orton vs. Undertaker. Orton was on fire last year and won the world title before losing to HHH because Orton was on fire on the same show HHH was on. After moving on from the Game, Orton decided to go after the Streak because he’s the Legend Killer. Orton made it clear that he was evil now by acquiring a girlfriend in Stacy Keibler so he could RKO her. That’s about it but do you need more?
Randy Orton vs. Undertaker
It’s Wrestlemania so we get druids, chanting and torches for Undertaker’s entrance. This is never not cool. We also get the Burn in My Light theme for Orton from back when Orton looked like a 24 year old and not like he was made out of orange shoe leather. Undertaker is just 12-0 at this point. Feeling out process to start until Orton scores a quick dropkick for two. A single right hand puts Orton down but a quick rollup out of the corner gets two for Randy.
Undertaker throws him into the corner and drops the leg on Orton on the apron for good measure. Old School drops Orton again but Undertaker misses a running boot in the corner, allowing Orton to dropkick him out to the floor. Back in and a clothesline puts Taker down again for two but a running DDT drops Orton for two for the tall guy. Undertaker follows up with some clotheslines in the corner before loading up the snake eyes/big boot combo. Orton blocks the coming boot with an uppercut but he stops to pose, allowing Undertaker to sit up.
They slug it out until Undertaker simply runs Orton over for two. Off to a dragon sleeper by Taker which clearly makes Orton tap but it doesn’t count this early I guess. Orton twists around into a nice DDT for two before we hit the chinlock. Taker fights up so it’s a sleeper instead, only for Taker to counter again with a belly to back suplex. Back up and Orton powerslams Undertaker down for two but he makes the eternal mistake of punching Undertaker in the corner and gets caught in the Last Ride.
Orton escapes though and tries the RKO, only to be shoved off. He grazes the referee on the way to the ropes which apparently passes for a ref bump. The Last Ride is countered again and here’s Randy’s dad Bob with the cast (that’s a VERY slow healing injury as it’s at about 23 years now) to give Orton a VERY close two. In one of my favorite counters ever, Taker loads up the chokeslam but Orton counters in mid air into the RKO for two. Like any good lunkhead, Orton loads up the Tombstone but gets countered into the real thing to make Taker 13-0.
Rating: C+. While not great, Orton was trying out there. The problem was that Orton had been crushed so badly by HHH that there was no reason to buy him as a threat here. I won’t say didn’t even have to break a sweat here but other than that RKO counter and MAYBE the cast shot, Undertaker was never in any danger or even extended trouble.
We recap Trish vs. Christy Hemme. Christy looked amazing in Playboy and Trish got jealous because she was Women’s Champion but couldn’t get any respect. Hemme, who wasn’t a wrestler, challenged Trish to a title match. Lita was coaching Hemme to try to make this interesting but it never worked at all.
Women’s Title: Christy Hemme vs. Trish Stratus
Trish immediately takes it to the floor and sends Christy knees first into the steps. Did I mention this is Christy’s singles debut? Christy comes back with some kicks that look amateur at best. Stratus comes back with some chops in the corner but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Trish hits a hard kick to Christy’s ribs and shoves the injured Lita into the barricade. Christy fires off more kicks and hits a reverse Twist of Fate for two. Trish has enough of this and Chick Kicks Hemme down to retain.
Rating: F. This is where you can tell that the Playboy push was a terrible idea. At the end of the day, Hemme was a model, not a wrestler. If they want to hire models, then either teach them for a long time or don’t have them wrestle, because this kind of stuff is embarrassing. I’m not saying Hemme wasn’t trying or anything like that, but she simply didn’t have the talent to be here. Trish would hold the title until next Wrestlemania.
We recap Shawn s. Angle which I think is going to be better. They put each other out of the Rumble but Angle snapped because when he won a gold medal, everyone kept talking about how awesome Shawn Michaels was and now fifteen years later, Angle wants to get Shawn back for it. Shawn says Angle is great, but this is Wrestlemania and therefore Shawn’s world.
Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle
This was when Angle was the wrestling machine so this should be awesome. Kurt takes in the YOU SUCK chants because that’s how awesome he is. I should mention the set as it has the Hollywood sign on one side and a movie marquee on the other side which says Now Playing and then the match, making it feel all the more special. They stare it down to start until Shawn slaps him in the face.
Angle takes it to the mat and rides Shawn to frustrate him. Shawn gets to a rope and gives Kurt a look like “o………..k then time for a new plan.” Michaels grabs a headlock takeover to slow things down but the fans are behind Kurt. Kurt fights up but can’t escape the hold without using the ropes. Nice storytelling there with Shawn gladly going to the ropes but Angle going to them out of frustration.
Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.
Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.
Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex before putting on a body vice with a chinlock. The fans are split here but Shawn fights up with some chops to take over. Kurt will have none of that though and suplexes Shawn down to stop the comeback bid. Another belly to belly gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Michaels gets up again and they slug it out with Angle taking Shawn down with a hard clothesline.
Shawn blocks a superplex attempt but Kurt rolls away from the top rope elbow. There go Angle’s straps but Shawn counters the Angle Slam and backdrops Kurt to the floor. Shawn goes up and half dives/half falls onto Angle with a cross body. As they get back in, Angle tries his German suplex off the apron but Shawn kicks him low like a good former villain. With Angle on the announce table, Shawn hits a gorgeous springboard spinning cross body to send Angle onto the floor as the table doesn’t break.
Both guys make it in on different sides of the ring at nine. Angle is bleeding from the mouth. They slug it out again with Shawn taking over. There’s the forearm and nip-up as Shawn’s back is perfectly fine all of a sudden. Now the big elbow hits but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock but Shawn FINALLY makes the rope. The Angle Slam is rolled through but Angle counters into the ankle lock but Shawn counters into a rollup for two. Another superkick is caught and there’s the Angle Slam for two.
To show how angry Kurt is, he puts his straps up just so he can take them down all over again. In a scary spot, Angle tries the moonsault but Shawn doesn’t roll away far enough, sending Angle’s face into Shawn’s side. Shawn goes up again but Angle runs up the corner for the belly to belly off the top. Somehow that only gets two and Angle yells at Shawn, talking about how Michaels’ days are done. Shawn shoves him back and superkicks Angle down but he can’t follow up.
The cover eventually gets two and Shawn isn’t sure what to do now. He slowly stands up but Angle grabs the ankle lock again. Shawn tries to kick Angle off but Kurt won’t let go. They’re in the middle of the ring with Shawn writhing in pain. Angle puts on the grapevine and Shawn is all but dead. He hangs on for as long as he can before FINALLY tapping out to give Angle the win.
Rating: A+. Angle and Shawn at Wrestlemania having a masterpiece. Who would have ever seen that coming? The match was excellent all around and the match never stopped being great. They would have another masterpiece at Summerslam which again shouldn’t surprise anyone. Great match here and definitely worth seeing if you haven’t before.
Shawn gets the big ovation post match.
We get the Basic Instinct trailer which is Stacy Keibler flashing Jericho, Benoit and Christian while implying she and Trish are lesbians.
Moolah and Mae Young are here.
It’s time for Piper’s Pit with newly inducted Hall of Famer Roddy Piper. Apparently his guest is Steve Austin but it takes Piper forever to get to the entrance. Piper is pretty much rambling here as is his custom most of the time. Oh wait Piper says that he’s the toughest guy around here rather than Austin. Here’s the Rattlesnake for his annual cameo. They slap each other as this is supposed to be some epic encounter I think. Piper gets annoyed at the WHAT chants but gets into the concept pretty quickly.
This goes on WAY too long as Piper says that he’s the real rebel instead of Austin. Austin makes fun of the way Piper looks and asks if he’s supposed to be scared or intimidated. Piper says they’re failing to communicate and here’s Carlito of all people. Piper thinks Carlito looks like Alfalfa and insults are traded. Carlito has his own apple spat in his face by Roddy so Piper is beaten down. Austin beats up Carlito, beer is consumed and Austin Stuns both guys. This went on WAY too long and was more awkward than anything else.
We get the Taxi Driver trailer which is most of the roster trying to do “You talking to me?” with very mixed results. Batista does a Who’s On First bit as he asks for his line and the script guy keeps saying “You talking to me?” constantly frustrating Big Dave. Good stuff.
Akebono vs. Big Show
Time for our “celebrity” match of the year. Akebono, a grand sumo champion, is going to face Big Show in a sumo match. There’s a circle in the ring (that’s kind of overkill) and you have to knock the other guy out of it or off his feet to win. Show of course is in the sumo thong because what else would you expect from him?
The big idea here is that Akebono is outweighed for the first time ever. They spend way too long setting this up before the whole match lasts like a minute with Akebono throwing Show out of the circle. Seriously, that’s it. Total waste of time here. Yes, a legit sumo grand champion beat a guy with no idea what he was doing.
We recap Cena vs. JBL which is a culture clash. The idea is simple: Cena is the new young guy who is popular with the fans while JBL is old, rich and reserved. JBL has held the title forever and someone has to stop him eventually. Cena has been at war with JBL and his Cabinet as well so it’s basically 4-1 tonight. JBL has spent months insulting Cena’s life and family because Cena can’t touch him without losing his title shot. JBL couldn’t touch him either or he would lose the title, so Cena spraypainted a lot of JBL’s stuff.
Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield
JBL gets a police escort for his limo as JBL dollars fall from the sky. Surprisingly enough the champ sends Orlando Jordan and the Bashams to the back before the match. This is one of the rare instances where “My Time Is Now” is very appropriate. It’s a feeling out process to start but Cena runs into a boot in the corner. The champion starts pounding away in the corner and there’s the fallaway slam for good measure.
JBL chokes away on the ropes as this is in very slow mode to start. They slug it out for a bit but Cena charges into a spinebuster to put him down again. A neckbreaker gets two for the champion and a big clothesline gets two on Cena. JBL puts on a sleeper but Cena counters into a belly to back suplex to put both guys down. A double clothesline puts both guys down and we head to the floor for a neckbreaker by the champion.
Back in and JBL puts Cena down with a superplex for a delayed two as the crowd is mostly dead. Layfield goes up but dives into a powerslam for no cover. Cena comes back with his usual stuff including the Shuffle. Cena pumps up his shoes and after ducking the Clothesline, the FU (now called the AA) gives Cena his first of many world titles.
Rating: D. This was a REALLY dull match as JBL was freaking terrible in the ring at this point. He was so slow and lethargic and the match never worked at all. The ending sucked too as JBL didn’t even hit his finisher before taking the FU for the pin. Their rematch at Judgment Day was WAY better as it was a total brawl which suited JBL to perfection.
We do the Hall of Fame stuff. The class is introduced and Orndorff is far more impressed with Miss Jackie than anything else. The class this year is Volkoff, Iron Sheik, Orndorff, Bob Orton, Jimmy Hart, Piper and Hogan. Guess who gets the biggest reaction by far.
Wrestlemania 22 is in Chicago.
We recap the main event. HHH was world champion for the better part of ever in Evolution but Batista was becoming the big star. In January Batista won the Royal Rumble and got to pick HHH or JBL to challenge at Wrestlemania. Batista overheard HHH and Flair calling Batista stupid and HHH’s days were numbered.
Raw World Title: Batista vs. HHH
Since this is HHH, he gets the big entrance with Motorhead before Batista comes out, meaning Batista gets a much weaker entrance. Little things like that are why people can’t stand the guy. The singer for Motorhead BUTCHERS the song, but then again it isn’t likely one he sings that often. Oh and HHH rises through the stage with the band and gets to pose with them before Batista just walks out. For a big old school fan like HHH, it’s pretty interesting that he comes out first like that, no? Batista also doesn’t have pyro yet so he looks like he’s having a seizure on the stage. No I Walk Alone yet either.
They lock up to start with HHH shoving him against the ropes. The locking up continues with Batista not being able to shove HHH down like a power guy should be doing. A shoulder block puts HHH down but HHH gets to run Batista over this time. You know, so it’s clear that HHH is every bit as strong. A Pedigree is countered and Batista powerslams the champion down. Big Dave hits some shots to the face in the corner followed by a backdrop. Dang they’re really cranking this up now.
HHH hits the jumping knee to the face to send Batista back to the floor. Yet again, Batista can’t get anything going at all. Batista gets distracted by Flair and is sent into the steps by the champ. Back in and HHH drops an elbow on Batista’s back to keep control as this has been mostly one sided so far. Flair gets in some choking and HHH drops more elbows on the back. A suplex puts Batista down for two as this is already going slowly. Flair chokes away even more before HHH guillotines Batista out to the floor.
We get the “deliberate pace” line from JR which means “dear freaking goodness DO SOMETHING ALREADY!”. Batista hits some right hands to wake the crowd up a bit but there’s the HHH spinebuster to make sure HHH doesn’t look bad at all. The Pedigree is countered with a backdrop but there’s the facebuster to stop Batista again. We’re eleven minutes into this match and it’s ALL HHH so far. The Game goes up but jumps into a clothesline followed by a side slam for two.
The fans don’t get fired up of course though and they have no reason to. Batista’s offense has been stopped cold every time and there it is again as he charges into a boot in the corner. Batista throws him to the floor but YET AGAIN HHH stops him by sending him into the steps. The Pedigree on the steps is countered into a catapult into the post to bust the champion open. Back in and Batista pounds on the cut before clotheslining him in the corner.
The pace is still REALLY slow again because Heaven forbid we get an exciting main event. They head to the floor again where Batista lays out Flair as the referee disarms HHH with a chair. The referee goes down so here’s Flair for interference. HHH gets in a belt shot for two and the fans FINALLY wake up a bit. The spinebuster puts HHH down but the momentum is broken up AGAIN with a low blow. The Pedigree is blocked though and it’s something that we would call White Noise and Batista Bomb to give Batista the title.
Rating: C-. Oh dear. This wasn’t about Batista winning the title but rather about HHH losing it. Instead of looking dominant, Batista looked like a guy who survived against HHH, which is one of the last things you want to do to make a new star. Just WAY too much HHH on offense here and it brought the match way down, especially for a match that was supposed to be Batista’s coming out party.
Batista celebrates to end the show.
Overall Rating: B-. There’s some really lame stuff here but the historical significance of the main events more than make up for their lackluster in ring material. The MITB match and Angle vs. Shawn are more than worth seeing and Orton vs. Undertaker isn’t bad. Most of the matches here fall under not bad and the show is a letdown as a result. Still though, it’s good stuff, but it could have been legendary.
Ratings Comparison
Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero
Original: B-
Redo: C+
Edge vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Benoit vs. Christian vs. Kane
