Smackdown
Date: April 9, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and for once, there are some important things actually happening here. This time around we have the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, plus a Smackdown Tag Team Title match. Normally I would have an issue with the titles being defended on Smackdown instead of the pay per view, but considering they have not been defended since Dolph Ziggler and Bobby Roode won them in January, how important can they be? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Daniel Bryan going after Roman Reigns and Edge.

Here is Daniel Bryan to get things going. Bryan talks about how we are so close to Wrestlemania and he can’t wait to finally see it, hear it and feel it. Yes the Thunderdome is great, but there is nothing like wrestling in front of a live audience at Wrestlemania and there is nothing like winning the Universal Title in the main event.

Now Bryan is known for his association with the word YES, but there are people who don’t think he should be involved in the main event of Wrestlemania. Just ask Batista and Randy Orton, or Edge and Roman Reigns. They will tell you no, but Bryan knows the truth and that is how he came to say yes yes yes. Bryan was told he would never wrestle again but he said yes. Then he was told he would never headline Wrestlemania again. Adam Pearce said no, but he said yes.

This Sunday is the biggest match of his career. You have Edge who thinks Bryan stole a spot from him. Then you have Roman Reigns, who knows Bryan can beat him and that means Reigns is nothing that he thinks he is. Bryan is willing to do anything he has to do to win this the title, which brings him to the last question: can he walk out of the main event of Wrestlemania as Universal Champion? Yes. YES. YES!!! This was a GREAT promo as Bryan sold every single thing he needed to about the show and more. I know he is best known for his in ring stuff but dang he can talk with the best of them.

The Street Profits are joining in on the YES chant when Bobby Roode and Dolph Ziggler attack them. The Mysterios and the Alpha Academy join in and the big fight is on.

Tag Team Titles: Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler/Bobby Roode

Roode and Ziggler are defending and it is one fall to a finish. We are joined in progress with Dominik getting stomped in the corner and the champs have to make a save. A back elbow gives Roode two on Dominik and we hit the chinlock. Dominik fights up and the hot tag brings in Rey to clean house. Everything breaks down in a hurry with the Mysterios cleaning house, including back to back dives to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Roode working on Ford. Otis comes in to drop a big elbow on Ford and it’s off to Ziggler for the chinlock. A nice dropkick puts Ford down again but the Fameasser is countered into a helicopter bomb. The hot tag brings in Dawkins to clean house but Rey tags himself in and sends Dawkins outside.

The Mysterios clean house and Dominik’s frog splash gets two on Roode, with Otis splashing them for the save. Everything breaks down and Dawkins sunset flips Gable for two. Gable’s backslide gets the same but Ford tags himself in and hits the huge frog splash on Gable to knock him silly. Roode tags himself in though and steals the pin to retain at 13:05.

Rating: C+. This was as you would have expected as they went nuts with the speed and fast paced part, though there is still something lacking about the match not taking place on the pay per view. At least we had the match at all though, because the titles actually need to be defended at some point. The lack of a title change doesn’t matter, though I’m not sure who is going to take the titles from Roode and Ziggler.

Bianca Belair is nervous about the Wrestlemania title shot but she isn’t scared. This is the biggest opportunity of her career and the chance makes her dangerous. When she wins the title, it is the greatest night of her life.

Big E. is getting a haircut in his hometown of Tampa because this is where he comes to get his mind right. He takes us on a tour of Tampa, including near his high school where he would run two miles before he would go on to win a state championship in wrestling. Then we have Raymond James Stadium where he played in a high school all star football game and where he took a piece of the field with him. Now it is where Crews is defeated at Wrestlemania. Big E. was bringing the fire here and I wanted to see more of it.

Wale will perform Big E.’s theme song live.

Long video on the Fiend vs. Randy Orton. I still can’t believe it’s just a regular match.

Tamina vs. Nia Jax

Reginald, Shayna Baszler and Natalya are all here too. They shove each other around to start and Tamina backhands her into the corner to start the beating. Tamina and Shayna get in a tug of war over Reginald so Nia runs her over off the distraction. Nia misses a charge into the corner but Baszler offers a distraction, allowing Nia to crotch her on top. Tamina hits a superkick to the ribs and a Samoan drop for a delayed cover but Shayna comes in for the DQ at 2:58. This has been your annual “Tamina is AMAZING” Wrestlemania season moment.

The Riott Squad is ready for Tag Team Turmoil but Carmella and Billie Kay come up and confirm that they are in the match as well. Dana Brooke and Mandy Rose and Lana and Naomi come in and the big brawl is on. Natalya and Tamina come in to leave everyone laying.

We get an election ad style video on how you don’t know the real Cesaro. You know Seth Rollins though, because he is the kind of a person who you can believe in. Paid for by the Friends Of Seth Rollins.

Here is Edge for a chat. He sits in a chair with a spotlight on him and talks about how he needs to manifest his dreams. Yes he won the Royal Rumble and some fans would ask if that is enough. Those people do not understand what it means to come back after nine years off and how hard it is to get this far. Edge did not come back to be a shell of himself because he wants to steal the show. He wants to be Universal Champion and does not want to hear from Daniel Bryan.

Remember when Bryan had all of those ridiculous ideas about how he could be involved with the title match? Bryan needs to go be some bookstore clerk and stop sticking his nose in their business. Then there is Roman Reigns, who walks around like Edge owes him something. In reality, Reigns owes him, because think about it. Reigns came into the company in a three man group, made his entrance through the crowd and uses a spear as his finisher. Edge: “You’re the Samoan Edge.”

This match is taking place ten years to the day that he had to vacate the title but you don’t get a video package set to piano music on that. If it is Daniel Bryan doing this, that video is made in a heartbeat. Edge fought back through a torn tricep and won the Royal Rumble so why is he having to jump through hoops?

Edge isn’t phoning this in because he is doing this at a level that no one has ever done after coming back from this kind of an injury. That is a slap in the face to him and his work ethic so it is time for him to take and command the respect that he deserves. He is the Rated R Superstar and winning the title is his dream. Now he will manifest it. Another great promo here because Edge is about 9375% better as a heel.

Sonya Deville talks to Adam Pearce and thinks it should be Edge vs. Reigns in a singles match. She leaves him with that thought.

Sasha Banks isn’t worried about Bianca Belair. After Belair taps out at Wrestlemania, she will know her place in WWE, which is beneath Banks. At Wrestlemania, Banks will prove that she is the V-EST.

Video on Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre, which will open night one.

Sami Zayn came in to see Logan Paul and Jake Paul at their boxing training session and invited himself in. Then he accidentally locked himself out of the gym, where another boxer won’t let him back in.

In the arena, Sami storms the announcers’ table and wants to know how that tape was shown. Sami promises to end Kevin Owens at Wrestlemania. Speaking of Owens, here he is to attack Zayn and send him running.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Akira Tozawa, Mustafa Ali, Angel Garza, King Corbin, Cedric Alexander, Drew Gulak, Elias, Erik, Gran Metalik, Humberto Carrillo, Jaxson Ryker, Jey Uso, Kalisto, Lince Dorado, Mace, Murphy, Ricochet, Shelton Benjamin, Shinsuke Nakamura, Slapjack, T-Bar, Tucker

I’m probably missing at least a few people. It’s a big brawl to start as tends to be the case in a match like this. Cedric and Shelton get rid of Tozawa and then do the same to Tucker (with his shiny silver pants). Everyone else goes after Shelton and Cedric, who are ready to go. They’re also ready to be sent outside as it’s a double elimination to send us to a break. Back with Erik being tossed out and Gulak earning the same fate.

Mace and T-Bar get together to throw out Carrillo, who lands on Gulak. There’s a jumping knee from Elias to get rid of Slapjack, giving us Mace/T-Bar vs. Ryker/Elias. Mace and T-Bar get rid of both of them but Ali dumps Mace. Murphy saves Ali from an elimination for some reason and Ali gets rid of T-Bar. The Lucha House Party teases a reunion but Dorado won’t do the dance. That means a double team on Kalisto and he gets kicked out without much trouble. Carrillo dumps Dorado but gets backdropped out by Corbin as the ring is clearing out in a hurry.

We take a break and come back with Murphy and Garza slugging it out on the apron. Garza TAKES OFF HIS PANTS but gets kicked in the face. That’s not enough for an elimination, but Corbin shoving Murphy off the ropes certainly is. Nakamura gets rid of Garza and we’re down to Nakamura, Ali, Corbin, Uso and Ricochet (not too shabby). Ali and Ricochet fight to the apron and Ricochet headscissors Ali out.

Uso superkicks Ricochet out though and we’re down to three. Another superkick puts Corbin on the apron and Nakamura knees him out. Nakamura elbows his way out of the Samoan drop and nails the spinning kick to the head. Uso hits a superkick but Nakamura blasts him with Kinshasa. The elimination is reversed though and Uso wins at 15:44.

Rating: C. This wasn’t too bad and I’m good with the winner. Uso has been one of the biggest surprises in wrestling in the last six months and it is nice to see him actually win something for a change. It isn’t the biggest prize in the world, but Uso’s stunning main event run was a bigger deal anyway. This gives him something of his own though and that is a cool thing to see.

Post match here are Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman for the big final chat. Reigns doesn’t know why he is here because he is in a title match when he doesn’t even have to be pinned to lose. No he isn’t worried about winning on Sunday because when you spend every day at a 12, wrestling at a 10 isn’t hard. Maybe he can have one good week like Daniel Bryan and Edge, but he has been having great weeks since August 23 at Summerslam.

Reigns made this title relevant but the fans cut him off with the YOU TAPPED OUT chants. That makes Reigns chuckle, because if Bryan made him tap, he would be champion. Then you have Edge saying no one took the title from him. Reigns: “That’s garbage.” Reigns took it from Edge and the comeback story ends at Wrestlemania. Being in the main event with Roman Reigns is Edge’s dream and that is where it ends. It is also where Reigns’ dream begins, because what he has done in the last year is just the start.

Reigns is the head of the table and that makes him unselfish. The dreamers are the ones who are selfish because it is all about them. Who gave Jey Uso the greatest year of his career? They have the gold right over there (the Andre trophy) to prove how great it has been. Reigns is going to smash the two of them on Sunday and the referee is going to count 1-2-3. They are going to look up and see a greater man than them as the whole world acknowledges him. Another great one here, and one of the better promos Reigns has ever given.

Overall Rating: B. This show was centered around the three promos and the matches filled in the gaps. That made for a very concise show which focused entirely on Wrestlemania and a pair of big matches. I really liked this one and it flowed nearly perfectly, but there was one thing that gets annoying: if WWE wrestlers can do promos this well around Wrestlemania season, what in the world is the excuse the rest of the year??? Reigns, Bryan and Edge all had really high level promos here that played off of each other and told the story of the match. You won’t see that again all year and I will never understand why.

Results

Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode b. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio, Alpha Academy and Street Profits – Frog splash to Gable

Tamina b. Nia Jax via DQ when Shayna Baszler interfered

Jey Uso won the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal last eliminating Shinsuke Nakamura

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

So here we are. After all these months, we’ve finally arrived at Wrestlemania and as JR has put it, it don’t get no bigger than this. The main event is Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar (THIS TIME FOR SURE!), along with Ronda Rousey making her long awaited in-ring debut. It’s hard to say what to expect, other than a very long show with a lot of stuff crammed in. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show. My seat was in the lower arena in the corner, opposite the hard camera. I was looking almost directly at the upper right hand ring post.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are in on commentary for this, along with Saxton. I was coming into the stadium as the wrestlers came down the ramp so my timing couldn’t have been much better. As usual, it’s almost impossible to tell what’s going on to start until Aiden English is eliminated. Anderson gets rid of Viktor and it’s already time for Ziggler to do his last second saves.

There goes Hawkins (who I still can’t wait to see actually win something) R-Truth and Goldust reunite for all of eight seconds before Goldust tosses him. With an incorrect countdown to Wrestlemania clock on the screen, Primo is eliminated as well. Mike Kanellis is out (I forgot he worked here too) as Byron tries to explain the Woken Universe to JR. With Jim not exactly sounding interested, Apollo knees Breeze out.

Viktor is out next and the ring is starting to clear a bit, at least to the point where you can at least see the mat. Matt does his rapid fire rams into the buckles to rock Goldust, drawing another DELETE chant. Ryder loads up the Broski Boot on Ziggler but Mojo Rawley runs him over for another elimination to make the fans hate him even more. Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows and we take a break.

Back (After they showed the commercial in the stadium. You know, the place WHERE WE’RE WATCHING WHAT THEY’RE ADVERTISING!) with Revival getting rid of Apollo. Wilder is sent to the apron but a Dawson save allows them to eliminate Benjamin instead. The Revival is sent out at the same time, followed by Kane getting rid of the Miztourage. We cut to the crowd where John Cena is watching as a fan (because of course he is) and come back to see Cara being tossed as well.

Kane uppercuts Fandango out and Slater makes the mistake of going to the apron, allowing Corbin to get rid of him as well. Gable joins him on the floor, leaving us with Corbin, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Fandango, Kane, O’Neil and Dillinger. That means a Kane vs. Corbin showdown but everyone else interferes before anything happens. Titus starts cleaning house and throws Ziggler over his shoulders, only to get superkicked and clotheslined out. Goldust snaps off the powerslam to Ziggler and it’s Shattered Dreams to Tye.

Ziggler is ready for him though and dumps Goldust but gets punched down by Hardy. That gives us the TEN vs. DELETE showdown, which I didn’t know I needed to see. A Twist of Fate is enough to get rid of Dillinger, followed by Ziggler superkicking Kane’s hands. Kane dumps him without much effort but Corbin dumps his fellow giant to get us down to Mojo, Corbin and Hardy. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the double teaming begins. Not that it matters as we’ve got Bray Wyatt to save Hardy, allowing him to eliminate Rawley. Wyatt takes End of Days but Matt gets rid of Corbin to win at 16:34 as Wyatt wasn’t entered.

Rating: D-. Yeah this was terrible, running WAY too long and making me wonder when it was going to be over. So many of these people just don’t need to be on Wrestlemania (Hawkins, Ascension, R-Truth, Primo, Kanellis, Rawley to name a few) and they’re just extending the show by being in this. Matt winning makes the most sense as it’s not like many other people in the match are doing anything at the moment.

Matt and Bray pose post match as Bray is officially good. Now just don’t get injured and lose your spot again.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

The title is vacant coming in, Drake Maverick is at ringside and Ali is SubZero for some reason. Cedric shouts a lot and they shake hands for the sake of good sportsmanship. An exchange of shoulders goes to Cedric so Ali snaps off a hurricanrana for our first standoff. Back up and Cedric flips away to grab a headscissors, followed by a dropkick for two. Ali gets sent to the floor and taken down by a big flip dive but there’s no commercial, despite the announcers sounding like they were sending us to one. Nice change of pace for once.

Back in and we hit a waistlock to keep Ali down and a high backdrop gives Cedric two. Another waistlock and a knee to the ribs keep Cedric on target as he certainly has a game plan. Cedric plants him with a Spanish Fly and counters a tornado DDT by crotching Ali on top. With Ali stunned, Cedric goes up as well but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly, which even impresses Cena. The 054 is broken up with a shove to the floor and now we go to the inset ad for Rousey’s debut. At least they didn’t show this in the stadium, which would have almost been just as annoying as showing the whole thing.

Back with Cedric getting caught in a reverse hurricanrana and now the tornado DDT connects. The 054 hits this time but Cedric gets his foot on the ropes. Another 054 attempt misses and Alexander elbows him in the head. Ali gets elbowed down again and the Lumbar Check gives him the title at 12:18.

Rating: B-. This was a lot less competitive than I remember it being as Alexander dominated from the beginning and ran over Ali save for a little flurry near the end. Alexander winning is the right call and I’m glad neither of them went heel here. They both looked good but Ali was a step behind what he usually does here. I had a good time with it and Cedric winning is a feel good moment. That’s all you could ask for here.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Naomi, Carmella, Mandy Rose, Peyton Royce, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Sarah Logan, Dakota Kai, Sasha Banks, Mickie James, Bianca Belair, Becky Lynch, Kairi Sane, Taynara Conti, Sonya Deville, Lana, Bayley, Ruby Riott, Natalya, Dana Brooke

Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary. Royce, Devi, Kai, Belair, Sane and Conti are from NXT. Lynch, Bayley and Banks are the only ones to get entrances. Carmella poses with the briefcase at the bell and gets gang attacked, meaning it’s an early elimination. It’s Dana being circled (Dana: “THAT’S NOT NICE!”) and gang attacked for the elimination.

Everything breaks down and the NXT women stand tall, meaning it’s time for the required NXT chant. Becky yells at Devi for stealing the orange look and gets slammed for her complaints. Mandy gets tossed and Paige is panicking. Deville is slammed down and Belair is allowed to hit a 450 as we take a break.

Back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow on Riott during the commercial. Devi is tossed and Conti is knocked out a few seconds later. Belair whips Becky with the hair but gets kicked out in short order. Kai kicks Naomi in the face to put her under the ropes and out to the floor. Banks gets rid of Kai and Riott punches Mickie out. Now it’s Royce firing off some kicks but the Riott Squad superkick her out to a chorus of boos.

We’re down to the Squad, Natalya, Banks, Bayley and Naomi on the floor. Natalya suplexes Riott and Logan down but Bayley saves Sasha from the same. Bayley and Sasha get rid of Natalya, Morgan, Riott and Logan in short order. They stare each other down and Bayley gets the quick elimination. Cue Naomi though and the Rear View is good for the win at 9:49.

Rating: D+. I liked it better than the men’s version (that’s not exactly a high bar to clear) but egads what is the point in giving this to Naomi? She’s been doing a grand total of nothing in recent weeks (months really) and there was a story between Banks and Bayley. This feels like giving Orton the Royal Rumble last year in that someone has to win it, even if

And now, the main show.

Khloe and Halle sing America the Beautiful. They’re billed as “the future of music” but I’m not convinced. If that’s the case, I’d expect an original song.

The opening video is about having a good time, just like it was four years ago. The camera walks through the streets of New Orleans and goes into a cafe/club before someone goes onto a balcony to throw beads down to a crowd below. The regular highlight package, set to Kid Rock’s Celebrate and mixed with Wrestlemania XXX highlights (good choice really), takes us into the stadium and my goodness the set looks amazing. It’s designed to look like a Mardi Gras mask, though the bottom looks like a huge mustache over the entrance. Also, several of the wrestlers’ eyes will appear in the mask for a very cool touch.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending after both challengers beat him in one night, which is totally the same thing or something. Rollins has blue contacts in, I guess making him the ice to the fire that burns it down? Still though, looks pretty cool. In another cool addition, there are some personalized 3D projections for some wrestlers, including Miz’s name with quotes around him saying how great and awesome Miz is. These could only be seen on the monitors so I didn’t notice them until the second match.

Miz, looking even goofier than usual with what looks like a red version of Drew Gulak’s old gear, sends the Miztourage to the back so he can do this on his own. Balor has a rainbow shirt on with a group of fans in identical shirts cheering him on from the stage. The screens say “for everyone” with FOR EVER capitalized.

Balor sends Miz into Rollins to start and some rollups get two for all three of them. With Miz being sent outside, Rollins superkicks Balor in the ribs, only to get sent outside. That means a big flip dive onto the two of them as Balor gets the first real advantage. Everyone heads back inside with Rollins hitting a double Blockbuster for two on Balor. Miz takes Rollins down and grabs a chinlock for a few seconds to slow things down. A neckbreaker gets two on Balor and it’s back to the chinlock.

Balor fights up and stomps on Miz’s ribs but gets caught with a Sling Blade from Rollins. Seth isn’t done and hits a suicide dive on both guys, only to get caught in a Sling Blade from Balor. Miz’s short DDT gets two on Seth and he boots Rollins in the face to break up a springboard. A dragon screw legwhip sets up the Figure Four on Balor but here’s Rollins with a frog splash for the break. That looked much better on screen as you didn’t see Rollins until he was on the top and ready to jump.

They all head outside again with Balor escaping the shoulder breaking barricade bomb. Instead it’s a Sling Blade to put Rollins down but he’s back up with an enziguri to rock Balor. That earns him a Pele and the 1916 for two as Balor is stunned. Miz catches Balor on top but gets caught in a buckle bomb, leaving Balor to take the superplex into a Falcon Arrow but Balor reverses into a small package for two. A Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Rollins to cap off a rocking sequence.

Another Finale is reversed into a rollup for two but Balor gets crotched on top. Rollins goes up top with him but Miz is right there with a super Skull Crushing Finale (looked better than it sounds). The cover is broken up with a Coup de Grace and a second hits Miz clean. Rollins runs over with a Stomp to drive Balor’s head into Miz’s back, followed by the regular version to pin Miz for the title at 15:30.

Rating: B. This was the kind of match you expect from the Intercontinental Title as all three were working hard and the match felt very crisp at the same time. Miz will get the title back someday and break both records, as he should. I’m sure Balor will get the title as well, which is nothing but good for the Intercontinental Title. If nothing else it’s cool to see the former World Champions becoming Intercontinental Champions. That wasn’t always the case (After Pedro Morales, the next former World Champion to win an Intercontinental Title was HHH in 2001) but it’s a good way to give the title some more instant credibility.

Ad for the Andre documentary. I’ve heard good things.

Cena is still a fan. How cool would it be to have him next to you at Wrestlemania?

We recap Charlotte vs. Asuka, which is title vs. streak. Charlotte has dominated the Women’s Division for nearly three years now but Asuka hasn’t a match since debuting in late 2015. The match here is Queen vs. Empress with Charlotte saying she’s ready for Asuka.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and copies HHH’s entrance from Wrestlemania XXX with a throne and three masked men helping her off. These three: Riddick Moss, Tino Sabbatelli and Dan Matha. I’m assuming this was something about she once helped HHH off the throne but now she has her own, but it felt like a tribute to HHH more than anything else. Asuka on the other hand has 3D masks superimposed over her entrance. You know, in case it wasn’t scary enough already.

They fight over a wristlock to start with both of them flipping away, leaving Charlotte to hit the strut. Charlotte trips her down and goes for the leg but Asuka kicks her away, setting up a knee shot for two. Back up and Asuka’s hip attack is blocked so it’s time for the chops. The second hip attack sends Charlotte outside and you can see the cockiness on Asuka’s face.

Charlotte gets back in and it’s time to start cranking on the arm to set up the Asuka Lock. It’s way too early for that though so Charlotte strikes her in the face a few times but has to break another attempt. This time it’s a backpack Stunner to get Charlotte out of trouble and some knees to the head (think the Stomp but with a knee) put Asuka down again. The moonsault misses though as Asuka catches her in a triangle (SWEET!) in the middle of the ring.

That’s reverses into a Boston crab but Asuka rolls her way out of it. They head to the apron (becoming way too common) and Asuka suplexes her down to the floor in a big crash. Back in and the missile dropkick puts Charlotte down for two and Asuka is getting frustrated. They go up top and it’s a super Spanish Fly (I believe that’s three on the night so far) to give Charlotte a big breather.

Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold on the mat before switching to the Asuka Lock. Charlotte reverses that with a rollup before cutting Asuka in half with a spear for a VERY near fall. With Asuka half done, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight, balancing on one hand because of the banged up arm. After hanging on as long as she can, Asuka ACTUALLY TAPS to retain Charlotte’s title at 13:05.

Rating: A-. I was kind of stunned at the amount of time this had as I would have bet on it being at least five minutes longer. This felt like a clash of titans and Charlotte winning gives her a very strong case for being the best of all time. Aside from not being around as long as some others, she has the resume, skill and pure skill to make her the best WWE has ever seen.

Having Asuka do a lot of her usual stuff (albeit cranked up a few notches) was a great way to set up the match as Charlotte was able to hang on and use what she had seen along with her natural athleticism to be ready for what Asuka brought. It was hard hitting, told a story and was an instant classic. Great stuff here, which shouldn’t be that surprising.

Post match Asuka says Charlotte was ready for Asuka and congratulates her.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something (the words “Taker is here” may have been spoken) so Cena jumps the barricade (security around here sucks) and sprints up the ramp. That took something away from the women’s moment. Do the commercial and then move on to the Cena angle. It’s not going to make that much of a difference and lets the women have their full moment.

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Rusev vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending after having a three way feud with Roode and Mahal for the last few weeks. Rusev pinned Orton in a tag match to be added, along with being one of the hottest guys in the company. Aiden English (who has gotten his hair cut since the battle royal) introduces Rusev, in rhyme of course. You can see the fans heading for the concourse during the entrances, which is rather interesting given how popular Rusev was over the weekend. Aside from a Wrestlemania shirt, I saw more Rusev Day shirts than anything else. I guess the repelling powers of Mahal and Orton are too much even for Rusev Day.

The early threat of an RKO sends Mahal bailing to the floor and Rusev dropkicks Roode to the floor. Rusev cannonballs off the apron to take out Orton and Mahal as Phillips acknowledges the popularity of Rusev Day. Back in and Roode’s Blockbuster gets two, leaving Mahal to get punched back and forth between Roode and Orton. A superplex brings Roode down but it’s Mahal asking Rusev for an alliance.

Rusev, realizing that he should have been Mahal last year, stomps Mahal down in the corner instead before getting two off a belly to back suplex. Roode is back with a spinebuster for two on Mahal but gets posted by Orton. Now it’s Rusev kicking Orton down until a spinwheel kick misses. The hanging DDT plants Rusev and English is starting to panic. A pair of RKO’s take out English and Rusev, followed by one to Mahal for a near fall with Roode making the save. Mahal takes a Machka Kick but can’t get the Accolade. Instead he has to deal with Sunil Singh and walks into the Khallas to make Mahal champion at 8:15.

Rating: D. And that is the big middle finger to the fans who thought they were getting somewhere with the Rusev Day chants. WWE wants Jinder Mahal to be pushed in this role and the lack of success and complete apathy to his push means nothing. This is what WWE wants and you can chant RUSEV DAY and buy his merchandise all you want. Mahal is WWE’s guy right now and you can just deal with it until they’re tired of him. Rusev taking the fall here is all the evidence you need: your voices don’t matter here and get over it. The match was as uninteresting as these four were going to be, which was completely expected.

The Fashion Police try to give Mick Foley a ticket but Breeze likes his style, driving Fandango to his knees in terror.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon. Rousey signed with WWE earlier in the year but Angle thinks HHH and Stephanie are just trying to use her. This set off a feud between the two teams with Rousey beating HHH much, only to have Stephanie put her through a table. The match was set up because Rousey needs a debut and putting her in a tag match is the best possible idea. It lets them hide her negatives and accentuate her positives so this has some potential. Of course there’s also the potential that it’s really just about Stephanie, which certainly wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibility.

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle

In a near repeat of last year, HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles with a group of motorcycles accompanying them. I don’t know if HHH is just that big a fan of motorcycles or if he just wanted to see his wife as a biker chick again (fair enough) but this didn’t do much for me. Rousey comes out in a Roddy Piper style kilt, in what shouldn’t be a shock to anyone paying attention whatsoever. The fans give Rousey a nice reaction and Stephanie pie faces her before the bell. They’re already milking the heck out of Rousey murdering her and a hair pull makes things even worse.

The men start things off with the fans telling Angle that he still has it. Angle cranks on the arm as they’re actually treating this like a tag match to start. Stephanie offers a low bridge though and HHH sends him into the steps to really take over. A suplex brings Angle back inside and we’re just waiting on this to explode. Back in and HHH calls for and delivers a spinebuster for two. Angle kicks him away and nearly into Stephanie but HHH puts the brakes on in time. A suplex drops HHH, only to have Stephanie pull Rousey off the apron. I’ll give Stephanie this: she knows how to be an amazing heel.

Another kick to the floor is enough for the tag to Rousey and the place goes coconuts. Rousey EXPLODES into the corner (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!”) to pull Stephanie in and scores with a running clothesline. With Stephanie in big trouble (Rouse: “COME ON B****!”), Rousey takes her into the corner and unloads with rights and lefts before throwing Stephanie again. It’s already time for the arm….and Stephanie blocks it by stacking her up.

Back up and Rousey goes into Beast Mode, setting up a spinning Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee out. Rousey: “You’re the biggest cheater I’ve ever seen! I’m going to go continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls Rousey outside as well but Angle takes him onto the announcers’ table. Kurt gets thrown onto the other table so HHH can check on Stephanie. He turns around to see Rousey though and it’s time for some intergender violence.

You can see HHH thinking about it and the fans are WAY into this one. He finally agrees to it and Rousey UNLOADS on him with rights and lefts to drive HHH into the corner. A fireman’s carry has HHH in trouble but Stephanie makes the save. This was GREAT with HHH selling the heck out of the beating and making Rousey look that much better. Stephanie slaps Rousey for some reason and the chase is on, this time with Stephanie sending him into the barricade.

HHH takes Rousey down though and it’s time for Angle to unleash the suplexes. The rolling German suplexes have HHH in trouble but he tries a quick Pedigree. That’s reversed into a catapult into the corner (he always takes that so well) and the Angle Slam gets two. There go the straps (that never gets old) but Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock. Angle doesn’t seem to mind and puts the ankle lock on her (doesn’t look great this time around). That’s broken up with a Pedigree but Rousey makes a save.

A powerbomb attempt to Rousey is countered into a hurricanrana (good one too) and there’s the armbar on HHH. The place (including me) goes even more nuts until Stephanie makes the save with a sleeper (called a rear naked choke, which of course Stephanie knows how to do). That’s reversed into another armbar attempt but Stephanie blocks AGAIN.

The ankle lock goes on HHH and the villains grab hands until HHH sends Angle into the women for the break. Angle and Rousey both get posted and it’s time for the double Pedigree. Kurt sends HHH to the floor and the armbar….is blocked for a third time. Rousey FINALLY gets it on and Stephanie taps at 20:38. Dana White is shown applauding Rousey from the front row.

Rating: A-. I can’t give it anything higher than that due to Stephanie going toe to toe with Rousey (at grappling nonetheless) but this was INCREDIBLY fun and far better than anything I was expecting. They pulled every trick they could to make Rousey look better here and it worked to near perfection. She looked like someone who had been doing this for years and came off like a star who is in this for the long haul. Absolutely incredible here and as entertaining as it could have been. I had a blast, Stephanie issues aside. The ending was fine and the most important part, so we’ll call this a major success.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

The Usos are defending, the New Day has 3D pancakes and, with the call of the DragonZord, Woods’ trombone summons an army of little people dressed like pancakes. I do like the Bludgeon Brothers’ logo with the arms holding hammers to make a B. Kofi wastes no time hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jimmy but Harper makes the save. The Brothers pulls Big E. to the floor for a beating and then powerbomb Woods into the post for good measure.

Back in and Kofi’s beating continues but Jimmy tags himself in and starts kicking away. Some superkicks do a little good but Harper shoves Jimmy into the corner. Jey tags himself in as well (must be a family thing) and starts kicking away, only to have Rowan break up the double Us.

Rating: D+. This feels like a victim of time but it’s not the worst thing in the world. They went out of their way to make the Brothers look like killers and that’s exactly what happened here. I could have gone for a little more time given to the match, but something has to be cut on a show this long and this was one of the most logical choices. The Brothers won though and that’s what matters the most.

Here’s John Cena for a match, though no opponent has been named yet. A second referee runs down though and tells Cena something is wrong. Cena grabs the referee as he’s shaking his head no. This goes on for a bit….and there go the lights….because Elias is here. Elias: “Were you expecting somebody else?”

Well that someone doesn’t have the charisma Elias has, nor does he have the talent that Elias carries in his soul. Cena bails back to his seat in disgust and leaves Elias alone to sing his song, insulting the fans as he always does. As you might guess, Cena gets up and cleans house by initiating his finishing sequence.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner and hammers away, including the running clothesline. Old School sets up Snake Eyes and the WORST BIG BOOT EVER. When you’re sitting hundreds of feet away from the ring and can see the gap between the boot and the hands in front of Cena’s face, it’s a really bad sign. But remember, HE STILL HAS IT. The chokeslam is countered into a belly to back suplex but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, sending Cena falling off his feet in shock. The chokeslam and Tombstone end Cena completely clean at 2:42. Undertaker doesn’t even seem to be sweating.

So….that happened. I definitely like it better than seeing Undertaker stumble through a long match and it certainly should be memorable. Of course it’s not likely to mean anything until next Wrestlemania season, but this is the perfect payoff: Cena has been acting like a complete and utter jerk this whole time and Undertaker threw him the most decisive beating of his career. Even the Lesnar squash saw Cena get in a little offense and a near fall. Here it was a single suplex and that was it. I’m fine with Undertaker going out like this, but at this point I have no reason to believe it’s over.

Hall of Fame video. Hillbilly Jim should be done any minute now.

Here’s the big presentation to the crowd.

Jeff Jarrett. Nice reaction and the strut still looks good.

Mark Henry. No salmon jacket, no buys.

Hillbilly Jim. My hero as a young Kentucky boy.

Ivory. She’s looking better now than she did when she was active.

Jarius JJ Robertson. Did you know he’s cute? Wasn’t sure if that was made clear.

Dudley Boyz. Yep. Next.

Goldberg. I’m hoping those chants aren’t piped in. He does a Green Lantern pose with the ring to wrap things up.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn. Owens and Zayn have been going after the two of them for months now and it wasn’t clear where things were going. Then Bryan was cleared to wrestle again and everything came together at once. The evil Canadians have been attacking both of them, including giving Shane a hernia. They’ve been fired, but Bryan wants one more match with their jobs on the line. The question here is whether or not Shane turns on Bryan, which could go either way.

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Shane is in a YES jersey, with the YES being pretty clearly taped on. That sounds like a way for a quick switch to YUP (Owens and Sami’s battle cry) for me. Bryan gets his own entrance, with a Terminator style video, showing the YES chant spreading around the world, even in mainstream sports, before locking in on the home of the YES Movement, which happens to be right here in the Superdome. You can see the emotion on Bryan’s face as he comes to the ring and it’s nearly moving to see.

Owens and Zayn’s music hit but they come in from behind for the big beatdown, including an apron bomb to Bryan. That might be enough for him as the medics come in to check. Even the fans don’t seem to buy this one, as they probably shouldn’t. Shane is willing to fight on his own and YES, we get the lame punches on Owens in the corner. The jumping elbow to the jaw puts Owens down but Shane has to beat up Zayn as well.

Now of course he can do that at the same time, including a jumping kick to Owens and a Maivia Hurricane to Sami. The old hernia pops up though and brings Shane down as we have a stretcher for Bryan. We settle down to Sami taking over on Shane before it’s off to Owens (thankfully in a KO Mania III shirt) to step on the stomach. Owens: “MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY! MONEY ISN’T GOING TO SAVE YOU NOW!”

A superkick sets up the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but Owens gets knocked to the floor. The Helluva Kick misses and Sami gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Of course Shane is fine enough to hit the Coast to Coast but Owens makes the save with a backsplash onto the bad stomach. The frog splash gets two but Bryan comes back in for the save. That’s not enough for a hot tag so Sami gets out of a chinlock by slamming Sami into the mat.

NOW it’s off to Bryan for the first time in nearly three years. He takes his time coming in (as he should) before hammering away on Zayn. There’s the moonsault into the running clothesline, followed by a running knee off the apron to Owens. A missile dropkick puts Bryan down but he grabs his head….and nips up because he’s fine. That was a scary but great moment. The running corner dropkicks rock Owens and Zayn and a top rope hurricanrana drops Sami. Kevin breaks up the knee though and the Helluva Kick is only good for two. My goodness finishers mean nothing on Wrestlemania night.

Owens tells him to stay retired and gets two more off the Pop Up Powerbomb. Since we haven’t seen him in long enough, Shane takes Owens down and we’re back to even again. Back in and Sami hammers away while asking how Bryan could do this to them. That’s enough for Bryan and he unloads with the strikes and YES Kicks, even hitting the big one. The running knee into the YES Lock is good for the submission at 15:25 to keep Owens and Zayn fired.

Rating: C+. This was of course ALL about Bryan, to the point where even Shane’s usual superhero efforts seem to pale in comparison. They didn’t go with the stupid swerve finish for the sake of the storyline because this needed to be Bryan’s night. To go from having no chance to wrestling in a huge Wrestlemania match is more than you could ever ask for and he doesn’t look like he’s lost a step. If he’s back full time, WWE just got one heck of a bonus. Not a great match, but the ending was what it should have been.

Bryan and Shane celebrate with Bryan going to the floor to kiss Brie in a nice moment.

Attendance announcement.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax. Bliss had been her friend for a long time but was eventually caught making fun of Nia’s size and weight. This didn’t sit well with Jax and it was time to SMASH. And take the title. Bliss is suddenly ultra confident despite being a foot shorter and about 160lbs lighter.

Raw Women’s Title: Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss is challenging and comes down from the set on a mini platform. So that’s what happened to Bad News Barrett’s stage. Hang on a second though as Nia needs to destroy Mickie James before the bell, meaning this is truly one on one. Bliss slaps Nia due to high levels of stupid and Jax’s growl gives us a horror movie level scream in response. Makes sense actually.

There’s a gorilla press to plant Bliss as the dominance isn’t taking time tonight. That’s not the beginning of the end for some reason as Bliss starts in on the knee to take over, including a double knee to the knee in the corner. A guillotine choke is shrugged off but Nia goes shoulder first into the post (WAY too common of a spot tonight). Twisted Bliss to the floor drops Nia and the DDT gets two, shocking/scaring the heck out of Bliss all over again.

For some reason Bliss calls Nia pathetic and slaps her a few times….until Nia grabs her by the throat. A charge into the corner is cut off by another kick to the knee but Bliss’ sunset flip is tossed into the corner. Bliss is right back with a poke to the eye but Nia is right back with one of the hardest Alabama Slams you’ll ever see. Since Bliss is mostly dead, it’s a super Samoan drop to put her away for good and make Nia champion at 9:01.

Rating: D+. I was firmly in the camp of this needing to be about a minute long with Bliss getting in nothing beyond a few harmless forearms and I’m still of that state of mind. Bliss didn’t look like a joke here but there’s a time to squash the heck out of someone and that’s what we had here. Jax is a monster and should have destroyed Bliss in short order. Bliss is going to be fine with one more of those cocky promos and it really would have been better to have her get crushed here. The ending did look great though and the right person won, but it’s the wrong path to get here.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. AJ Styles is the ace of the show and has beaten everyone put in front of him. Shinsuke Nakamura won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot and we have a dream match. Both guys have promised to win and hopefully they don’t collapse under the expectations. The hype video goes throughout AJ’s career, including clips of him on Thunder and from TNA (!) because WWE can just do something like that.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by an army of violinists plus Alice Cooper guitarist Nita Strauss playing the heck out of a guitar. That’s one of the better Wrestlemania entrances I’ve ever seen with Strauss’ playing stealing the show. AJ’s graphic lists him as the Universal Champion. If nothing else he gets a cool looking spinning ring of blue light around him once he gets inside for a cool visual.

Feeling out process to start as the announcers talk about the Japanese match without talking about the Japanese match. AJ drives him into the corner but gets shoved away as they’re still in low first gear. They hit the mat with Nakamura kicking him in the face before doing his head on the chest arm waving deal. A knee drop keeps AJ in trouble but he breaks up Good Vibrations to offer some mind games of his own.

Back to the corner we go with a hard forearm rocking Styles but he grabs a backbreaker for his first major offense. A knee drop gets two on Nakamura and it’s off to the chinlock. The drop down into a dropkick sends Nakamura outside but he kicks the leg out from the apron. A kick to the head really puts Styles in trouble and a middle rope kick to the face makes it even worse. Nakamura tells him to come on but kicks AJ down. Well dude if you want him to COME ON you have to give him the chance to pull it off.

The running knee in the corner rocks AJ but he’s right back with a pumphandle gutbuster for two. It’s Nakamura’s turn to come back in a hurry though and a Landslide (Samoan Driver) gets another near fall. Some right hands in the corner have AJ rocked but he kicks the knee out to take Nakamura down. There’s the Calf Crusher but Nakamura reverses into a triangle choke (another very popular move this weekend).

That’s broken up with something close to a Death Valley Driver and they’re both down again. Nakamura gets in the kick, only to come up holding the damaged leg. There’s some logic to Styles’ plan at least. The running knee hits the buckle and the Phenomenal Forearm gets two.

AJ needs to bring out the mega guns and tries the springboard 450, which hits the bad knee and gives Nakamura two off a small package. They slug it out until AJ Peles him down, only to get kneed in the back of the head. Nakamura has had it and drives knees into the head before slapping AJ a few times. The Kinshasa is loaded up but AJ rolls through, straight into the Styles Clash to retain at 20:20.

Rating: B. Yeah they didn’t really come close to the expectations here and I can’t say I’m surprised. They didn’t have much going on in the way of telling a story other than both guys hitting their big moves and countering a few of the other’s. There’s no reason to hate either of them and that makes for a dull match if you don’t build to a big finish. It’s certainly good but it never hit that next level that people were expecting. Oh and both Royal Rumble winners lose in their title shots. What a great use of the pay per view.

Post match Nakamura presents AJ with the title….and hits him low (with some Ric Flair level force) to turn heel. Nakamura mocks the fallen champion and kicks him to the floor for Kinshasa. For some reason he flashes a Diamond Cutter sign as he goes up the ramp. Maybe he’s a DDP Yoga user?

Now this was good, but why not do this BEFORE NAKAMURA LOST CLEAN? Do it at the worthless Fastlane or on any show before this match. Give them something more personal to fight over, because what we got for a story here was lacking a bit. I don’t get why WWE thinks this has as much of an impact after a loss, because it really doesn’t work. If nothing else have Nakamura hit him low to steal the title after Kinshasa didn’t get the job done. Just something other than this.

Kickoff Show recap.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

Strowman won the shot by winning a tag team battle royal on his own and his partner has been quite the topic of debate coming into this show. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float to the tune of When the Saints Go Marching In before switching to their usual entrance. I was worried I was a bit too tired and imagined all the costumed people on the float but not so much apparently.

Strowman comes out and turns the float over off the stage but has no partner. He knows everyone wants to know who it is, but he wanted to wait until he got to New Orleans. That’s because his partner….is a member of the WWE Universe. Strowman looks around forever and finally sees someone in the crowd. He goes into the crowd (this is taking WAY too long) and finds….a ten year old boy. The boy, named Nicholas, is introduced as Strowman’s partner as Graves is losing his mind.

Nicholas is terrified (completely understandable) as Braun starts (good idea) with Sheamus. Graves isn’t sure about this as Nicholas probably has algebra tomorrow. Fans: “WE WANT NICHOLAS!” A chokeslam gets two on Cesaro but Braun gets double suplexes. With Sheamus talking trash to Nicholas, he drops a top rope knee for two. On Braun, not the kid.

Braun crossbodies both of them down and Sheamus gets backdropped over the corner for a NASTY fall, hitting both the post and the steps on the way down. That’s enough for the tag to Nicholas….who tags straight out again. The powerslam on Cesaro is good for the pin and the titles at 3:57.

Rating: F. I laughed when it happened but the more I think about this, the worse and worse it looks. If you want to do this over a comedy team or something then fine, but after everything Cesaro and Sheamus have done over the last few years, this is the best they can get? Having Brains Strowman come out there would have been a better move as this comes off as a stupid idea where they just refused to pick something and went with the first stupid idea that came to their heads. Put Hawkins out there if this is the best thing you can come up with. I didn’t like this idea as it makes it into a total joke, which shouldn’t be the case.

Wrestlemania XXXV is in New York. Well New Jersey but whatever. I’m good on that one.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns. Lesnar won the Universal Title at last year’s show and Reigns won the Elimination Chamber after doing nothing main event level for months. Reigns went on to call Lesnar out for not being here all the time and just doing what’s best for himself, which earned Reigns a series of beatings. But hey, this time for sure, right?

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and nope, the plan didn’t work. As you might expect, the fans boo him out of the building all over again because THIS ISN’T WORKING. After the Big Match Intros, Lesnar hits three German suplexes in the first thirty seconds. Reigns is right back up with two Superman Punches and a running clothesline to put Lesnar on the floor. Brock grabs a belly to belly on the outside, followed by a second one with Reigns almost landing on his head.

The fans chant for CM Punk as Brock loads up the announcers’ table. Another belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the table (no elevation at all) and Brock hits another German suplex back inside. A seventh suplex (with a fan providing helpful signs) is almost completely flat as we’re just waiting on the beach balls now.

There’s another belly to belly, during which time the fans started doing the Wave. A fan in my section started shouting about how the fans should just leave if they’re that bored because they’re ruining it for the rest of the fans. He was promptly given a DELETE chant because wrestling fans are rather horrible people at times. It’s time for another table as the fans want Johnny Gargano.

Reigns posts him on the floor as the fans aren’t reacting in the slightest. A spear sends Lesnar over the table (still no reaction) as the Wave is in full swing. The fans loudly boo….because a beach ball is taken away. Reigns gets two off a Superman Punch and two spears and it’s beach ball time again. Brock blocks a spear with a knee for two, followed by the F5 for the same. The fans still aren’t interested, because this just isn’t anything they care about.

F5, two, F5, two (Brock: “MOTHERF*****!”), the fans chant BORING (actually acknowledging the match for a change, F5 through a table (to NO reaction), F5, two. That’s enough for Lesnar as he takes the gloves off and just unloads with the hard right hands as the fans declare this awful. Reigns is GUSHING blood but hits two spears for a near fall. Not that it matters as a sixth F5 retains the title at 15:49, shocking the heck out of the crowd.

Rating: D. Here’s the thing: the match itself is a hard hitting video game match and had some entertaining spots. If you watch it in a complete vacuum, it’s actually good. The problem is, at least in this case, you can’t just ignore everything else and watch the match on its own. This was a complete and utter rejection of everything going on and you can’t ignore it. I’m not sure how much more needs to be done to make it clear that Reigns isn’t working but this might be it. Either that or we try to do this again NEXT year, just because that’s what WWE is obsessed with doing.

I have no idea where they go from here as Lesnar might not be around much longer and other than Reigns, there’s no one that could conceivably take the title from him. Reigns winning here was the logical call, but I can see why they pulled the plug. If it’s that bad though and the fans have rejected him this many times in a row, it’s time to admit defeat and move on. Hopefully that’s what the loss means, but stranger things have happened, just with Roman alone actually.

After a long highlight package, as in about seven minutes long, a cleaned up Reigns walks up the ramp to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. You know, there’s a pattern to these mega long shows. For the last three years, they’ve all started off white hot for about two hours but then they hit a road block and go sailing off a cliff. In Dallas it was the Cell, in Orlando it was the mixed tag and here it was pretty much everything after Rousey’s match (Bryan and Styles’ matches ranged from good to acceptable).

Maybe it’s having Reigns as the big finish or maybe it’s just the length of the shows, but they simply can’t maintain the momentum they set up at the start of these shows. It’s like they just run out of ideas and throw whatever nonsense they have on the screen, which may or may not work. I can get that with a small writing staff, but with THIRTY WRITERS put together into two groups, there’s never an excuse to run out of ideas this quickly.

Overall, the show is more good than bad, thanks to the first two matches, the mixed tag, Bryan and AJ, but they really needed to shed….oh a good two hours to get this down to manageable. Notice that I keep saying that year after year. Seven hours is just not something that anyone can pull off because eventually your buzz goes away. It’s happened to me three years in a row and I can’t imagine I’m in the minority. Just give us a break at some point because not everyone needs to be on the show. If you’re only good enough to be thrown into the battle royal, odds are you don’t belong on the card.

Really, the mixed tag main eventing would have made more sense (like you would EVER have to ask Stephanie if she wanted to main event Wrestlemania). If they were going to pull the plug on Reigns winning the title here, go with the feel good, fun match and let Rousey look like the big star. It would make more sense but Reigns seemed to be set in stone for that spot, pretty obvious reaction aside.

All in all, Wrestlemania XXXIV is a good show that needs a MAJOR edit to make it work. Switch the lineup around, shorten some matches, cut some matches (in other words, GET THE TIME LOWER) and you might have something great on your hands. As it is though, it falls into the same category as the other two mega long shows: a hot start, but they run out of gas because there’s a limit to how much wrestling any large group of fans can take.

Results

Seth Rollins b. The Miz and Finn Balor – Stomp to Miz

Charlotte b. Asuka – Figure Eight

Jinder Mahal b. Randy Orton, Bobby Roode and Rusev – Khallas to Rusev

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle b. HHH/Stephanie McMahon – Armbar to McMahon

Bludgeon Brothers b. New Day and Usos – Double sitout superbomb to Kingston

Undertaker b. John Cena – Tombstone

Shane McMahon/Daniel Bryan b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – YES Lock to Zayn

Nia Jax b. Alexa Bliss – Super Samoan drop

AJ Styles b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Styles Clash

Braun Strowman/Nicholas b. The Bar – Powerslam to Cesaro

Brock Lesnar b. Roman Reigns – F5

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw
Date: April 5, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and unfortunately about half of the show will be destroyed by the NCAA Championship game. Therefore you might expect a lot crammed into the first hour and a half or so, but we are going to be lucky enough to have the main event of Drew McIntyre vs. King Corbin, because you always need more Corbin. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Drew McIntyre for an opening chat. We see a clip of King Corbin and Bobby Lashley taking him out last week and, after the fire goes off, McIntyre talks about how we have five days until Wrestlemania. Things have changed so much in the last year and now McIntyre is ready for he and Lashley to tear each other to shreds.

Drew talks about how much he wanted to be WWE Champion, even when his mother was getting leukemia treatment. He wanted to go home so badly but his mom threatened to beat him up herself if he gave up. It took his this many years to get to the top of the mountain….and here are Lashley and MVP to cut him off.

Lashley says it took Drew sixteen years to get to the top but it took Lashley seventeen so he knows the feeling. Now he is on top of the mountain and everyone wants to take his title. Last week he felt Drew quiver and shake in the Hurt Lock, which Drew agrees is no joke. Drew is ready to fight right now but MVP says they’re waiting for Saturday. MVP promises Drew loses so Drew says maybe he can go be an Amazon driver instead. Or he can say screw that and come win the title back at Wrestlemania. King Corbin comes out to promise to beat up Drew tonight.

Riddle and New Day make jokes about Omos getting Kofi pretty high last week. Kofi Kingston hopes no one gets that high over the weekend but knows they’ll win. Oh and Riddle is ready for Sheamus, even though he smells bad.

AJ Styles vs. Xavier Woods

AJ has the Calf Crusher on in less than a minute so Kofi throws the microphone at Omos for a distraction. That makes AJ let go of the hold and Woods grabs a small package for the pin at 1:18. This has been your first example of “get them out of the ring before they can get hurt during Wrestlemania week”.

New Day goes into the stands to celebrate with the titles.

Bad Bunny and Damien Priest show up in a $3 million Bugatti.

Video on Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon, including the announcement of their cage match at Wrestlemania.

Here is Braun Strowman in a cage for a chat. Strowman is sick of being tired of being called stupid, even with Shane having his fake report card last week. At Wrestlemania, Strowman is fighting for everyone who has ever been called stupid. At Wrestlemania, it isn’t going to be here comes the money, but here comes the body bag. Cue Shane McMahon to say the decision to have a cage match is not that stupid. Shane promises to beat Strowman at Wrestlemania and that is going to make him feel stupid. This is still a horrible feud, but at least this was coherent and not something that made me want to lash out irrationally.

Braun Strowman vs. Elias/Jaxson Ryker

The double teaming puts Strowman down to start and Ryker hits a top rope headbutt. Elias hits a top rope splash called an elbow, but Strowman kicks both of them off at once. That makes Shane take off his jacket to come to the ring but Strowman knocks Elias and Ryker away, sending Shane backtracking. Strowman clubs them down and hits back to back powerslams for the pin at 2:36.

Miz and John Morrison have buckets of paint….and use it on the Bugatti, complete with HEY HEY, signatures and a painting of a bunny. Good thing it’s a white car.

Post break Bunny finds his car and panics a good bit, only to have Miz and Morrison jump him from behind. Agents and Priest make the save as Bunny seems more surprised than hurt.

We recap the contract signing between Rhea Ripley and Asuka from last week. It turned violent and led to a tag match this week.

Rhea Ripley says she and Asuka have to work together tonight or they’ll get destroyed. Asuka can wait for vengeance.

There will be a four team Tag Team Turmoil on Saturday, with the winners getting a Women’s Tag Team Title match on Sunday.

Asuka/Rhea Ripley vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Non-title. Shayna and Asuka shove each other around to start with Asuka taking her down and stepping on her face. Ripley comes in and throws Baszler around so it’s off to Jax for the power showdown. Jax picks her up but Ripley slips out and….tags Asuka right in. Jax runs Asuka over for two but she is right back with a Codebreaker.

It’s back to Ripley, who is distracted by Reginald and sent into the apron as we take a break. Back with Jax dropping an elbow on Ripley to keep her in trouble. That’s broken up in a hurry and the hot tag brings in Asuka to clean some house. A knee to Baszler gets two but Ripley turns on Asuka, allowing Baszler to hit a running knee for the pin at 12:01.

Rating: C-. Makes as much sense as anything else, as it isn’t like there was any reason for Ripley and Asuka to work together. Ignoring that this is the fourth time in a month and a half that we have had people feuding for a title facing the Tag Team Champions between Raw/Smackdown/NXT, the match at least made a bit of sense this time around.

We look back at the Hurt Business splitting up last week.

Cedric Alexander, with Shelton Benjamin by his side, grabs MVP by the jacket and says Lashley is nothing without the two of them backing him up. Violence is teased but Cedric and Shelton let him go and leave. MVP says he isn’t worried about Lashley vs. Cedric tonight. He talks about how many great things he did for the two of them when Lashley comes up to ask what happened. Lashley promises pain for Cedric tonight.

Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler are happy with their win when the women in the Tag Team Turmoil match on Saturday (for the shot at the Women’s Tag Team Titles on Sunday) and Billie Kay come in to say they’ll win. Jax’s “YOU DON’T EVEN GO HERE” to Natalya/Tamina was funny. Not as funny as when Bianca Belair said it in NXT last year, but still funny.

Video on Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre.

Cedric Alexander vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title. Hold on though as Shelton Benjamin comes in to help Cedric jump Lashley before the bell. Lashley knocks them away and we officially get going with Lashley sending Cedric into the corner. A neckbreaker gives Lashley two and they head outside with the beating continues. Cedric’s forearms to the back have no effect so Lashley sends him into the corner for the running shoulder to the ribs. Outside again with Alexander being sent ribs first into the post as we take a break.

Back with Alexander hammering away but being sent outside. Benjamin saves Alexander from going into the post again so it’s the Neuralizer to stagger Lashley back inside. A missile dropkick gives Alexander two but Lashley plants him with a spinebuster. The spinning Big Ending sets up a powerbomb/spinebuster (Lashley got him so high that it could have been either) and the Hurt Lock finishes Alexander at 10:20.

Rating: C. This was longer than I would have expected and it was nice to see Alexander get in some offense before going down as he should have. As stupid as it is to split up the Hurt Business before they could really become great, Lashley running through them has been effective. Granted he could have run through some other talented people to get here but leave it to WWE to mess up something good.

Post match Lashley won’t let go so Shelton comes in for the save, earning himself a beating of his own.

Video on Fiend vs. Randy Orton.

Here are Damien Priest and Bad Bunny to address what Miz and Morrison did earlier. Priest says it’s easy to jump Bunny 2-1 so let’s make this a tag match at Wrestlemania. Bunny talks about how he has been a huge fan for a long time and watched wrestling with his dad. He is only here to do his job and perform his song about Booker T., but now he has to deal with these two.

After switching to Spanish for a bit, Bunny says he doesn’t respect Miz anymore and at Wrestlemania it is time to give him a whipping. Miz and Morrison pop up on screen to mockingly applaud everything Bunny and Priest said. The tag match is on and they ride off in their limo.

Mustafa Ali talks to Sheamus about how Riddle cost him the US Title. Tonight, he’s taking care of Riddle, but that’s not cool with Sheamus. He’s rather serious about this but Riddle splits them up with his scooter.

Mustafa Ali vs. Riddle

Non-title….and a bunch of colorful birds come flying at the screen when Riddle jumps up to kick off his shoes. I know it happened last week and it’s still bizarre. Riddle takes him down for the early triangle choke attempt but Ali is out in a hurry. Ali gets in a chinlock of his own but Riddle breaks that up just as fast and sends him outside for a kick to the chest. A Sheamus distraction (thanks to the hat) lets Ali drop Riddle on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Ali hammering away in the corner and grabbing a bodyscissors to work on the ribs. Riddle gets him up and drops back for the break, meaning it’s time for some breathing. They get back up with Riddle hitting the running forearms in the face, only to have Ali go back to the ribs. A few kicks get two and Ali grabs a guillotine choke but Riddle isn’t having any more of this. The choke is quickly reversed into a Bro Derek for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: C. This is another match that could have been something interesting if it meant anything other than softening Riddle up for Sheamus. That being said, I can go for Riddle activating Beast Mode and destroying someone, though I do wish it wasn’t Ali. They did what they needed to do here, even if it wasn’t something I wanted to see.

Drew McIntyre is ready to run through King Corbin and move on to the title match. He isn’t sure why Corbin thinks this is a good idea, but it’s a Claymore and the pin.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Drew McIntyre vs. King Corbin

Before the match, Bobby Lashley promises to put McIntyre to sleep at Wrestlemania. MVP is on commentary as they shove each other around to start. Drew grinds away on a headlock for a bit before running Corbin over for two. Corbin manages the slide underneath the corner into a clothesline for two of his own, followed by a hard whip into the corner to drop McIntyre again. A belly to back slam gives Corbin two more and they head outside.

This time Corbin is whipped into the steps though and McIntyre smiles as we take a break. Back with McIntyre getting two off of a bridging northern lights suplex and then hammering away. Corbin sends him to the apron and then into the post though, which has MVP rather pleased. Back in and Corbin gets two of his own off a suplex of his own before crucifixing the arms and elbowing McIntyre in the head.

Corbin cuts off a comeback attempt with a chokeslam for two. Another under the ropes clothesline is cut off with a spinebuster for a jackknife cover into a near fall. McIntyre grabs the Futureshock for two because THIS MATCH NEEDS TO KEEP GOING. Corbin catches him on top and gets two more off a superplex, followed by Deep Six for the same. That’s enough for MVP, who says that this is about taking out McIntyre, meaning it’s time to send in the cane. Of course it takes too long and McIntyre hits a (very leg slappy) Claymore for the pin at 18:00.

Rating: C+. Well thank goodness they split up the Hurt Business because otherwise we could have had McIntyre fighting the two of them here instead of Corbin vs. McIntyre for the better part of twenty minutes. Gotta get that Corbin in there though, as he doesn’t have anything to do at Wrestlemania and it wouldn’t be right to not have him do the same power moves that he has done since he debuted. Throw in the “oh dang we need to wrap this up” finish and this was entertaining, but really frustrating at the same time.

Lashley comes out for the big showdown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show served one purpose and one purpose only: to get you fired up for Wrestlemania. What we got was good enough in that regard, but watching an eighteen minute Corbin match might not exactly light you up all that much. The rest of the show had some moments, but you could feel every minute of this three hour commercial, with only a few parts being noteworthy. It isn’t like there were expectations coming into this one, though I’m not sure how much more it made me want to see the shows.

Results

Xavier Woods b. AJ Styles – Small package

Braun Strowman b. Elias/Jaxson Ryker – Powerslam

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax b. Asuka/Rhea Ripley – Running knee to Asuka

Bobby Lashley b. Cedric Alexander – Hurt Lock

Riddle b. Mustafa Ali – Bro Derek

Drew McIntyre b. King Corbin – Claymore

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 29, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, MVP, Tom Phillips

We are less than two weeks away from Wrestlemania and that means it is time to really hammer things home. That might be a problem for the next two weeks though as the shows are going to be up against the NCAA Elite Eight this week and championship game next week. I’m not sure how WWE is going to handle these things but it could be interesting. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Drew McIntyre arrived earlier and isn’t worried about someone taking him out before Wrestlemania.

Here is the Hurt Business to get things going and MVP recaps the chance for someone to take out McIntyre for a future title shot. We look at Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander losing to McIntyre last week and Bobby Lashley is not pleased. They failed miserably and Lashley does not want to be associated with them. MVP gives them the chance to defend themselves but Shelton says Lashley wouldn’t have the title if not for him. Shelton doesn’t like MVP holding him back so Lashley decks Alexander and Shelton suplexes Lashley down. That earns him some knees to the ribs into a Downward Spiral.

We look back at Sheamus attacking Riddle with his scooter last week.

Riddle isn’t sure if Sheamus had a tummy ache or just doesn’t have a soul. Sheamus made him mad last week and tonight Riddle is dealing with it. Riddle goes over to Titus O’Neil and thinks that Titus is hosting the roast of Wrestlemania. Titus corrects him but Riddle asks about the mac and cheese. Sheamus jumps Riddle before their match.

We look at the Hurt Business split, for some reason featuring Main Event graphics.

Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander go up to Adam Pearce and want Shelton vs. Lashley tonight. If that works, Alexander wants a chance next week. Pearce isn’t sure, so they question his testicular fortitude. The match isn’t made but I think you know where this is going.

Riddle vs. Sheamus

Non-title. They go to the mat to start until Sheamus takes him into the corner for a shot to the ribs. A headlock takeover has Riddle in trouble but Riddle pulls him down into a choke (for what looked like a tap but doesn’t count). Sheamus fights up and they head outside where Riddle hits the Floating Bro.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus fish hooking the jaws but Riddle fights up. Sheamus goes up top but gets caught in a belly to belly superplex, with Riddle seeming to land on his head. Riddle is fine enough to send Sheamus into the corner for some running forearms into a t-bone suplex.

The Broton gives Riddle two but a triangle choke is reversed into a powerbomb….which doesn’t break the hold. Instead Sheamus makes the apron for White Noise onto said apron to knock Riddle silly for two. An Alabama Slam gets two more but the Brogue Kick is is broken up. Riddle’s knee is blocked but Sheamus’ connects (it looked like it was supposed to be a Brogue Kick but they were too close) for the pin at 12:45.

Rating: B-. As soon as I saw this match booked and it went past five minutes, I know where it was going, all the way up to Wrestlemania. That is the kind of thing that WWE has done over and over and for the life of me I don’t get the logic. They have a match that is probably the same length that they are going to go on Wrestlemania with a clean finish so now I am supposed to want to watch them do the same thing in less than two weeks? That’s the best that they have and it isn’t exactly inspiring.

Post match Riddle shoves Sheamus off the apron.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman.

Shane promises to expose Strowman tonight.

Drew McIntyre runs into AJ Styles and Omos and accuses them of wanting to cash in on Lashley’s offer. Omos says their Wrestlemania plans are more realistic and tension is teased.

Here are Shane McMahon, Elias and Jaxson Ryker for a chat. Shane credits adrenaline for allowing him to run to safety last week. As for Strowman, Shane has found a few things about him, including proof that Strowman is stupid. We see Strowman’s report card (three D-, a D and a D+), plus comments on how much of a distraction Braun really is. Then we get a picture of Braun, with his beard, a dunce cap and a WrestleMania XV jacket, standing in front of a blackboard with “2+2=5, I AM NOT STUPID I AM NOT STUPID” written in large chalk. Shane thinks Braun needs a hug so here is Braun himself.

Braun Strowman vs. Jaxson Ryker

Strowman throws him outside and chases Shane McMahon around (minus train sound effects) but Shane gets away. Back in and Ryker manages a quick shot and goes up, only to leave an ax handle short so he lands on his feet and then ax handles Strowman. That doesn’t get him very far so Strowman goes sends him outside again, setting up the train (with sound effects), but it doesn’t even go halfway around the ring and only hits one person. Back in and the running powerslam finishes Ryker at 2:27.

Post match the beatdown is on with Strowman cleaning house again. Strowman grabs the mic and reminds Shane that he gets to pick the stipulation. It’s going to be….a steel cage match.

It’s time for the Dirt Sheet, with Miz and John Morrison being rather pleased about their upcoming music video. Before we get there though, Miz needs to rant about his challenge to Bad Bunny last week, followed by Bunny attacking him to accept the challenge. Miz promises to pay Bunny back at Wrestlemania for every piece of wood in his back. Now we get the music video for Hey Hey, Hop Hop.

The video features the two of them in white suite (and bunny suits) dancing on the Raw stage and talking trash about Bad Bunny and Damian Priest in front of a fake crowd, including saying that Bunny isn’t OG like Bugs. Also, because WWE, we look at Miz and Morrison watching themselves on the screen, which kind of misses the point of a music VIDEO.

This goes on for a rather long time and Miz is in tears, so here are Bunny and Priest to interrupt. Bunny, in Spanish, promises to take care of Miz at Wrestlemania so Priest steps aside so Miz can get in Bunny’s face. A right hand staggers Miz (it looked good) and Priest and Bunny head inside to break up the Dirt Sheet set.

Randy Orton talks about being in the ring with a lot of legends over the years but none of them have been like the Fiend. Orton knew that he had to do something about the Fiend so he made the decision to burn the Fiend alive. Then Alexa Bliss started talking about how she could bring the Fiend back. Now Orton knows what he is dealing with and knows that at Wrestlemania he has to dig down deep and take care of this abomination. Orton will do whatever it takes to get the Fiend out of his life.

Bobby Lashley vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title and Cedric Alexander is here with Benjamin. Shelton wrestles him to the mat to start but Lashley powers up and hammers away. Lashley sends him outside for a hard posting, followed by a running shoulder in the corner back inside. Hold on though as Lashley has to chase Alexander up the ramp. The distraction lets Shelton hit Paydirt for two, followed by a running knee in the corner. Lashley shrugs it off and hits a pair of spinebusters into the Hurt Lock for the win at 4:13.

Rating: C. Shelton was game here and it made for a nice enough match. As usual, there is nothing wrong with an obvious ending and it isn’t like they wasted a bunch of time or teased a bunch of false finishes. Just get in, do what you need to do, and then get back out before things stop being interesting.

New Day comes up to AJ Styles and Omos in the back because they have an idea for game night. AJ is ready to fight Xavier Woods instead tonight but New Day doesn’t seem impressed. They’ll play some kind of a game first before we get to the title match at Wrestlemania. Kofi: “LET THE GAMES BEGIN BAY-BEE!!!”

Riddle vs. Sheamus is set for Wrestlemania.

It’s time for New Day game night, with all kinds of games set up in the ring. AJ Styles and Omos join them and we’ll start with charades. New Day manages to get A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton but AJ can’t get Omos to understand the Lion King. With that out of the way, it’s time for Pictionary (or at least something close to it). Kofi identifies a rocket ship but Omos can’t figure out the sun. Omos is sick of these games and AJ throws some of the stuff out before his match with Xavier Woods. This show is setting a new record for bad ways of building a pay per view.

A kid has paid tribute to Hulk Hogan with an impression and a big Hogan poster.

Xavier Woods vs. AJ Styles

Woods, in Mortal Kombat themed gear, shoulders AJ down to start and sends him into the corner. AJ gets knocked outside for the big flip dive from Woods, who mockingly glares at Omos as we take a break. Back with Woods hitting a backdrop and putting AJ on top but Styles drops him face first onto the turnbuckle. A fireman’s carry backbreaker gives AJ two but Woods is back with a tornado DDT for one. Woods goes to the apron but Omos grabs the leg to throw him back inside for the DQ at 7:57.

Rating: C. I know Kofi is the one who gets the glory but Woods is someone who can more than hold his own in the ring. That makes for some pretty good matches like this one, as Woods was able to do just fine against a master like Styles. It’s also nice to see Omos do something, because just standing there and glaring is only getting him so far.

Post match Kofi gets gorilla pressed over the barricade (with WWE knowing how to shoot the move to make it look all the more impressive). Woods gets planted with something like a Sky High so Omos can put his foot on Woods’ chest for a three count.

It’s time for Alexa’s Playground with Bliss looking at a Jack in the Box. They used to be called the Devil in the Box and could only be opened once they were weakened. That is what happened to the Fiend at Wrestlemania and Randy Orton believed that the Fiend was gone forever. The Fiend was really just weakened and trapped inside Bliss’ Fiend in a Box. Now Fiend is looking forward to Wrestlemania, because the Legend Killer dies. She turns the crank on the box and a Fiend figure pops up….and the real Fiend is sitting beside her. Ok that was actually kind of creepy.

Drew McIntyre is frustrated and heads into the locker room to ask who is stepping up to take him out and get his Wrestlemania title shot. No one has stepped up and he never would have done that just a few years ago. Drew tells Braun Strowman to step up because he should be a five time World Champion (egads the horror). Strowman says he’ll take care of Shane McMahon and then come for the title when McIntyre wins it.

Humberto Carrillo doesn’t seem interested so McIntyre tells Riddle to do it. Riddle says Sheamus is a full Thanksgiving meal….so McIntyre has to deal with Carrillo. McIntyre headbutts Drew Gulak and gets in Ricochet’s face. Ricochet knows Lashley’s word means nothing but if McIntyre wants a fight, he has one. Drew can respect that and they’re on for later. Makes sense, even if this made these people seem rather lame for not being willing to go after the title.

Naomi vs. Shayna Baszler

Lana, Nia Jax and Reginald are at ringside and Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke are on commentary. Shayna starts fast and stomps on the arm as we look at Brooke and Rose some more. The Kirifuda Clutch is broken up but Reginald offers a distraction. Everyone gets into a brawl on the floor and Naomi rolls Baszler up for the pin at 2:24.

Riddle comes up to Asuka in the back to ask if they would like scooters in Japan. Riddle starts to say something else, laughs, and says he forgot his lines. He walks off and Asuka awkwardly looks into the camera. I know it’s kind of hard to tell with Riddle, but that felt a lot like the Sid promo from the 90s where he forgot it was live.

It’s time for the contract signing for the Women’s Title match. Rhea Ripley and Asuka both come to the ring, with Ripley saying that Asuka is soon to be the former champion. Rhea signs and so does Asuka, who talks about Rhea having too much confidence. The table is turned over and smashed into Asuka’s head….and here are Shayna Baszler, Nia Jax and Reginald.

They can’t believe Ripley is here to get the title shot after Baszler has dominated the two of them already. Where is their Wrestlemania match? Baszler wants to fight Rhea right now but Jax proposes a tag match for next week, which Rhea accepts. So yes, now Jax and Baszler are going to drag down ANOTHER Women’s Title feud for Wrestlemania, because just one wasn’t enough.

MVP comes up to Ricochet and is happy that Ricochet is taking things seriously. Ricochet doesn’t want to hear it and heads to the ring.

Great Khali and Rob Van Dam are going into the Hall of Fame. This year’s class is pretty awesome.

Ricochet vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre wastes no time in LAUNCHING Ricochet for a backdrop and then sends him flying off a belly to belly. Ricochet gets in a shot to the face though and sends McIntyre outside, only to be pulled to the floor for a shot to the face. A whip into the steps is countered with a jump onto the barricade, where Ricochet walks across and hits a dropkick on the floor. Back in and 630 misses, allowing McIntyre to hit the Claymore for the pin at 2:41.

Post match here’s Mustafa Ali (who seems to have shaved a bit) to go after McIntyre’s knee. McIntyre sends him outside and we have another match.

Mustafa Ali vs. Drew McIntyre

Joined in progress with Ali staying on the leg and kicking it out to the apron. McIntyre’s chop doesn’t get him very far as Ali knocks him down to go after the knee again. A top rope splash to the leg gets two but McIntyre snaps off an overhead belly to belly. There’s another one but McIntyre is slow to follow up. A third suplex sets up a Glasgow Kiss into the Claymore for the pin at 3:42 shown.

Rating: C. This was a bit better than the previous one, though watching McIntyre run through people who could be in an interesting place on this show is a little rough. That being said, McIntyre and Lashley being built up as monsters is a good way to go and we could be in for a heck of a match at Wrestlemania as a result.

Post match McIntyre calls out Lashley and, after we cut to a nervous looking MVP, here he is. Post break, McIntyre says he didn’t even notice MVP behind him and now it is time to fight. The brawl is on with Lashley being knocked to the floor. Cue King Corbin to jump McIntyre from behind and lay him out until McIntyre manages a belly to belly. The Claymore is countered into Deep Six, allowing Lashley to put on the Hurt Lock. Lashley does it two more times to really hammer the point home and leave McIntyre laying.

Overall Rating: D+. Lashley and McIntyre did everything they could to save this but they could only do so much. I don’t remember the last time I saw a show that did so little to make me want to see a pay per view. This was every bad WWE booking trope (split up a perfectly good/rather good team, beat the champ to set up rematch, distraction finish, set up matches on the fly, a lot of Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler and a King Corbin appearance to set up a match either this week or next) with very little to make me want to watch. It felt like total autopilot for most of the show and that’s really bad at this time of the year.

Results

Sheamus b. Riddle – Jumping knee

Braun Strowman b. Jaxson Ryker – Running powerslam

Bobby Lashley b. Shelton Benjamin – Hurt Lock

Xavier Woods b. AJ Styles via DQ when Omos interfered

Naomi b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Drew McIntyre b. Ricochet – Claymore

Drew McIntyre b. Mustafa Ali – Claymore

I think we’ve talked enough about how unimportant this show is as even WWE has seemed to acknowledge it. They have gone out of their way to start advertising Wrestlemania already, mainly because it is taking place a mere three weeks after Fastlane. That is nowhere near enough time for a Wrestlemania build but at least they are doing something with it in advance. That means at the cost of Fastlane, but how many people are going to care? Let’s get to it.

Alexa Bliss vs. Randy Orton

Let’s get this out of the way early because this story has been awful. Odds are this is going to set up the return of the Fiend, or whatever the latest Bray Wyatt incarnation we’re getting, to get us to the final blowoff at Wrestlemania. I’ve been dreading this since the second they announced it because it is going to have a lot of supernatural shenanigans and that is not a good thing.

Since this is not likely to be a match but is billed as one anyway, I’ll take Bliss to “win”, as I can’t imagine Orton actually doing anything to her. I know it’s going to be bad and I don’t need to see it, but at least it’s better than watching Orton vs. the Fiend again….or at least I think it is. Anyway, Bliss wins the non-match.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler(c) vs. Bianca Belair/Sasha Banks

This is a tried and kind of true method of building towards a singles title match and thankfully we seem to have moved past the point of doing a title change here, as it would be one of the worse things that they could do. What worries me is the amount of Reginald that could be involved, because WWE REALLY wants to do that Jax Likes A Small Guy story for whatever reason.

I’ll take the champs to retain here, even though they have no other challengers and have done about all they can with the belts. Banks vs. Belair needs to be a story about the two of them instead of the two of them dealing with other people, so hopefully that is where we go after this match ends. I’m not sure what to expect going forward, but these stories need to be split up already.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Why? What did we do to deserve this, which very well may set up a rematch at Wrestlemania? I know Shane is a McMahon and that makes him one of the stars of the show, but it does not make him fun to watch in the ring. McMahon has been the face in this story since the beginning and watching him outsmart Strowman and beat him up on Monday didn’t help things.

For the sake of my sanity, I’ll take Strowman here, but I don’t think I have much of a reason to believe that is correct. There is little reason for this match to take place other than getting Shane in the ring again and the green slime deal did not make things any better. We’re pretty much down to hoping for a miracle with this one and that is not a good place to be.

US Title: Riddle(c) vs. Mustafa Ali

Redemption almost has to be coming to an end sooner or later a they have been on fumes for the entirety of their run. Maybe they get a boost if Ali can win the title here, but it’s not like anything else they have done has worked so far. The team is so far removed from its original identity that they don’t really even have characters anymore, so winning a title might give them a little something to focus on.

That being said, I can’t imagine they take the title off of Riddle so soon so I’ll go with him retaining and furthering Retribution’s problems. At the very least it would be nice to see Mace and T-Bar turned into a tag team as they could give New Day some issues in a hurry. That’s a little ways off though, as Ali has to lose to Riddle first, which is what I see happening here.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Seth Rollins

This was added during this week’s Smackdown and that means you should be able to see the path to Wrestlemania from here. Nakamura is standing up for Cesaro after Rollins took him out the previous week, like any good friend should be doing. That will likely set up Rollins vs. Cesaro at Wrestlemania, but first we have to get through this one and it should be a fun one.

There is no reason for Nakamura to win here so I’ll take Rollins as he gears up for Tampa and Cesaro. Maybe we can get the good Nakamura here instead of the coasting version, but given how he is feeling in this story, can you blame him for not exactly being thrilled? We might even have a great one in there, but I’m not exactly getting my hopes up for it this time.

Intercontinental Title: Big E.(c) vs. Apollo Crews

I want to like this one and there is a chance that we can get a good match, but everything will fall apart again as soon as Crews starts talking. I know that it is nice for him to have a character, but the combination of Coming To America and Black Panther accent is hurting what would otherwise be an interesting character. Big E. has sold the emotions while still taking a beating, so the potential is there.

I’ll take Big E. to retain here as I can’t imagine they take the title off of him that soon. Throw in the fact that Crews sounds so out there and it is hard to imagine the title changing hands. Crews is better than he was about a year ago, but I have no idea how far they think he is going to go without some adjustments. The talent is there, but as usual with WWE, they aren’t quite hitting the presentation.

Drew McIntyre vs. Sheamus

This is No Holds Barred and the Raw main event of the show. That’s not the worst idea in the world as these two have had some pretty awesome matches so far and I could go for watching them beat the fire out of each other on pay per view. There is a slight chance of throwing a monkey wrench into the McIntyre vs. Lashley Wrestlemania title match but that might be a stretch.

I’ll go with McIntyre here, but I can’t shake the feeling that they might try something. Lashley interfering would make some sense, though I’m not sure if that would change what they have already announced. We could be in for a heck of a fight here though and these two have shown some outstanding chemistry together. Let them do their thing and have the match of the night though, because that’s what they could do here.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Daniel Bryan

Now here we have the match where I really hope they do change something around, because this should be Wrestlemania. Bryan has made me believe in him all over again with those awesome promos on Friday and it would be great to see him get the chance to do his thing one more time on the big stage. Unfortunately we are getting Edge instead, and he will be ringside this time as the outside enforcer.

I really want to say that they’ll pull a surprise here (not necessarily a title change, but something that brings Bryan into Wrestlemania) but I don’t think they will. Edge will get involved in the finish and I could go for him trying to spear Jey Uso and hitting Bryan to cost him the title. That’s pure fantasy booking, but Reigns isn’t losing here and he’ll retain the title on his way to Tampa.

Overall Thoughts

The potential is there. This show feels like it could be rather good based on the complete lack of expectations coming into it and that is not a bad thing. There is little reason to care about the show but if the action and storytelling are both there, we could be in for a nice night. Odds are they are going to be in and out quickly as has been the case with most B level pay per views as of late, so for once we can call this cautious optimism.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 15, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Fastlane, which is such an important show that it doesn’t actually have any raw matches announced yet. Odds are that is fixed tonight, but it doesn’t hide the fact that even WWE doesn’t care about the thing. This should be an eventful one so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

They don’t waste time by announcing Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.

Here are Bobby Lashley and MVP for a chat to get things going. MVP says we are now in the Almighty Era and Lashley promises to destroy McIntyre at Wrestlemania. Lashley: “Right now are in the….Almighty Era.” And that’s why MVP handles most of the talking. Cue Miz and John Morrison with Miz praising Lashley’s speech and saying they are all in on the Almighty Era. They think Miz should be in the title match at Wrestlemania because Miz defended the title twice in one night and had cramps both times!

Cue Drew McIntyre to say he knows what it is like to be on a sixteen year journey. McIntyre was knocked down off the ladder and claw back up and then they have both reached the finish line. MVP tries to interrupt but gets shut down and is asked why he is here. Miz interrupts and gets glared down, with McIntyre saying he owes Miz one.

They are facing each other tonight and Miz needs to run because McIntyre is going to Fastlane to beat up Sheamus and then take the title back from Lashley at Raymond James Stadium. The fight is nearly on but a Miz distraction lets Lashley jump him from behind. MVP and Lashley leave so Miz hammers away. Cue Sheamus to jump Lashley until referees break it up. MVP holds Lashley back.

Post break Sheamus says he is going to beat McIntyre on Sunday but then he wanted to show Lashley what is waiting on him after Wrestlemania.

Miz vs. Drew McIntyre

Miz hammers away in the corner but McIntyre is right back with the chops to take over. The toss suplex sends Miz flying and the Glasgow Kiss makes it even worse. John Morrison throws his sunglasses at McIntyre, which just gets on his nerves. There’s the reverse Alabama Slam out of the corner so Morrison tries another distraction earning himself an ejection.

We take a break and come back with McIntyre sending Miz flying with an overhead belly to belly suplex. McIntyre takes him to the floor for a ram into the apron and several into the steps. Back in and the Futureshock drops Miz on his head, followed by the Claymore for no cover. Instead McIntyre picks him up, points to the Wrestlemania sign, and finishes with the Hurt Lock at 11:20.

Rating: C-. There is nothing wrong with a statement win like this, as the point was to show how ready McIntyre is for Wrestlemania. Miz is someone who is going to be fine with loss after loss so it’s not like this is going to take away any of his momentum. The match was mostly a squash anyway and that’s all it needed to be.

Bad Bunny won a Grammy.

We look at Shane McMahon calling Braun Strowman stupid.

Here is Strowman in the ring but Shane cuts him off in a hurry. Strowman knows that Shane isn’t going to apologize because that’s not what McMahons do. Instead, Strowman issues the challenge for tonight but Shane says no because Strowman can’t handle him. Shane talks about how this proves Strowman is stupid, like the t-rex, which went extinct as well. Then he accepts the match.

R-Truth, dressed like Steve Austin, interrupts Dana Brooke, Mandy Rose, Lana and Naomi, who tell him that 3:16 Day is tomorrow. They can’t drink though because they have a match next.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Lana/Naomi

Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler are on commentary. Naomi knocks Dana down to start and it’s quickly off to Mandy to hammer away in the corner. Dana comes in with a handspring elbow in the corner and Mandy adds a running knee to the face. That’s broken up and it’s off to Lana to clean house. Everything breaks down and here’s the returning Asuka (facing Baszler later) for the big distraction. Shayna goes after her and gets kicked in the head, leaving Lana to hit an X Factor on Mandy.  Brooke comes back in with a swinging neckbreaker to pin Lana at 4:28.

Rating: D+. This just does not work for these teams no matter how many times they try it. Lana continues to not feel like she has the best instincts in the ring, though she has been getting a bit better. These four are all trying, but Naomi should be near the top of the card, not toiling in the lower levels of the tag division.

New Day is ready to get the Tag Team Titles back when Riddle comes in. He wants them to win like he is going to do against Mustafa Ali tonight and then they can get matching scooters. Or have matching pancakes!

Tag Team Titles: Hurt Business vs. New Day

New Day is challenging. Woods takes Alexander down by the arm to start and it’s quickly off to Kofi, who pulls Alexander to him with an invisible rope (ala Ryo Mizunami in AEW). A jumping knee puts Woods on the floor though and Shelton sends him hard into the steps. Back in and Kofi hits the middle rope standing double stomp, which is enough to bring Woods back in to clean house.

Everything breaks down and they head outside with Woods being whipped HARD into the steps as we take a break. Back with Woods hitting a clothesline but getting kneed in the ribs. The Michinoku Driver gives Alexander two but Woods gets in a shot, allowing the hot tag to Kofi. The SOS gives Kofi two as everything breaks down. Woods hits a DDT on Alexander on the floor and Trouble in Paradise hits Shelton. Woods hits the top rope elbow into Daybreak for the pin and the titles at 13:04.

Rating: C+. Well that came out of nowhere. New Day has held the titles so many times now that it doesn’t mean anything anymore but that has never stopped WWE. The worst part here is that commentary acted like it was a bigger deal that the team has momentum heading into Wrestlemania rather than being champions. That’s not how things should be working and it explains a lot of WWE’s problems these days.

Post match here are AJ Styles and Omos to interrupt. AJ mocks New Day for having another win but says he is running out of things to accomplish. He has never been a Tag Team Champion though, so he and Omos should be the next champions. The challenge is on for Wrestlemania, but Kofi wants to know if they are even registered as a team. Woods accepts the challenge and everything is set.

Damien Priest and Bad Bunny mock Miz and John Morrison for losing everything but Miz asks what Priest has won. Priest gets in his face, sending Miz and Morrison running off. R-Truth comes in trying to hit Bad Bunny in the head with a Steve Austin lunchbox. Priest calls him out and Truth gives Bunny a bunch of Austin merchandise instead. Bunny is so touched that he gives Truth the 24/7 Title back, meaning Truth can remember Bunny’s name. The menagerie of numskulls gives chase and we’re back at it.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Damien Priest

Broken Arrow and Lights Out finish Ryker in 37 seconds.

Post match Elias tries to bring in the guitar but Bunny takes it away. Elias picks him up for a slam but Bunny slips out and hits Elias in the face, setting up Hit The Lights from Priest. Cue John Morrison for a distraction though and Miz runs in with a guitar shot to Bad Bunny. There’s the Wrestlemania angle.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Hold on as Shane needs to warm up. After some pushups, Shane goes over to the hopscotch game he has set up, because Strowman talked about how this was like being back in school. Strowman isn’t having that and grabs Shane, who he sends into the barricade. The Strowman Express is loaded up but Shane is waiting on him with a camera to the face instead. Another camera shots sets up the elbow through the announcers’ table. Shane isn’t done as he pulls out….a bucket of green slime to cover Strowman. With that done, Shane pulls out…..another bucket of green slime to cover Strowman again! No match.

Rhea Ripley is still coming.

We look at Alexa Bliss tormenting Randy Orton.

Bliss, on her swing set, says that if Orton wants to get rid of her, he can do it at Fastlane. But is he going to do it?

We look at Molly Holly being inducted into the Hall of Fame.

Asuka vs. Shayna Baszler

Non-title. During the entrances, Baszler says she is glad she hurt Asuka a few weeks ago. Asuka attacks them both before the bell and sends Jax outside with a Codebreaker. The bell rings and Asuka kicks away but gets kneed in the face. They brawl on the mat until Asuka gets up to dropkick Jax. Shayna grabs the Kirifuda Clutch but Asuka flips back for the pin at 1:31.

Post match Shayna doesn’t let go but Asuka escapes anyway. The beatdown continues with Asuka firing off Kawada Kicks and pulling off a turnbuckle pad. Baszler’s face is crushed against the buckle and Asuka loads up a curb stomp. The referee breaks it up to prevent a high dentist bill.

Mustafa Ali is yelling at Retribution when Riddle speeds through on his scooter. The sound effects he was making push this to funny.

Fastlane rundown with Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon added.

US Title: Mustafa Ali vs. Riddle

Ali is challenging and has Retribution with him. Riddle knocks him outside to start but gets sent into the announcers’ table. A swinging neckbreaker off the apron drops Riddle and we take a break. Back with Ali hitting another neckbreaker for two but Riddle strikes away. A suplex sets up the Broton for two and he kicks Ali in the head. There’s a rollup so T-Bar gets up, only to have Ali reverse into one of his own. T-Bar drops down but the delay lets Riddle kick out and hit the Bro Derek to retain at 8:31.

Rating: C. This was much more about Ali having problems with Retribution, if nothing else because he keeps promising that he can win the big one and failing just like them. It is a shame that Retribution has never taken off because the talent is there, but never let it be said that WWE doesn’t know how to screw things up. The team is likely on borrowed time and at this point, that’s probably the best idea.

Randy Orton is ready to kick Alexa Bliss out of his life.

Here’s Drew McIntyre to say he has been watching the show and doesn’t like MVP’s guarantees. That’s why he is out here tonight, because he wants to see this match up close and get ready for Wrestlemania.

Sheamus vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and Sheamus sends him into the corner to start in a hurry. Some forearms to the back have Lashley in trouble but he powers Sheamus to the mat. A clothesline drops Sheamus again and the delayed vertical suplex does it one more time. Sheamus is back up and sends Lashley to the apron for the forearms to the chest.

Lashley is fine enough to catch him with the overhead belly to belly though and we take a break. Back with Lashley working on the armbar and sending Sheamus into the corner again. The running charge hits the post though and Sheamus gets up top for the clothesline. Some elbows to the shoulder and an armbar keep Lashley in trouble and Sheamus sends him outside.

Back in and the Irish Curse gets two and Sheamus grabs a kind of complicated leglock. Lashley fights up again and hits a Downward Spiral, followed by a superplex for the big crash. The spear is blocked by a jumping knee to the face and Sheamus grabs White Noise for two. Lashley doesn’t seem to mind and pops up with the spear for the pin at 17:41.

Rating: B. I know he isn’t the most popular guy but Sheamus can do a good power match. That was on full display here and Lashley is more than capable of hanging right in there with him. This was a heck of a fight that took a little time to get going. Once they started trading bombs though, it was good good stuff and that’s what you would have expected from these two.

Post match Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock on Sheamus but McIntyre breaks it up with the Claymore. Sheamus and McIntyre stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really weird show as it did a very good job of setting up Wrestlemania but did very little to set up Fastlane, which is in less than six days. The good thing is that they added more matches to both pay per views, but Fastlane is going to be lucky to run longer than two and a half hours. The wrestling was more good than bad and there was nothing terrible (your taste may vary on Shane vs. Strowman) so this was one of the better Raw’s in a while (and it still wasn’t great).

Results

Drew McIntyre b. The Miz – Hurt Lock

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke b. Lana/Naomi – Swinging neckbreaker to Lana

New Day b. Hurt Business – Daybreak to Benjamin

Damien Priest b. Jaxson Ryker – Hit The Lights

Asuka b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Riddle b. Mustafa Ali – Bro Derek

Bobby Lashley b. Sheamus – Spear

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 1, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe, Tom Phillips

It’s a title night as we have the Miz’s first WWE Title defense against Bobby Lashley. This is an interesting one as it is hard to imagine Miz walking into Wrestlemania as champion, but at the same time they’re almost telegraphing the title change too hard. Drew McIntyre is back tonight too and that is likely to be a factor. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of the setup of the title match.

Here’s Drew McIntyre to open things up. It has been a rough month for him and we’ll start with his issues with Sheamus. They were friends for twenty years until Sheamus turned on him, though Drew is still not sure why. Then two weeks ago at Elimination Chamber (it wasn’t two weeks ago), Drew defended his title inside the Chamber but got attacked by Bobby Lashley. That let the Miz cash in Money in the Bank, because THE FREAKING MIZ is WWE Champion. It’s cool though, because his mission is clear: get the title back and main event Wrestlemania. He didn’t come that far to lose here so get out here Sheamus, because you’re the first step.

Cue the Miz and John Morrison, with Miz demanding his big, special introduction, complete with pyro. Miz brags about winning Money in the Bank and saying it was a matter of time before he became WWE Champion. McIntyre agrees and wants a hug but Miz turns him down, knowing that McIntyre isn’t happy with this. The only person McIntyre can blame is….Bobby Lashley!

McIntyre isn’t buying it so Miz says that he himself is the real victim. He has a wife and two daughters and Lashley threatened him at Elimination Chamber. Miz had no choice but to make that deal and now Lashley has a title shot instead of McIntyre. So maybe Miz and McIntyre should join forces as the 3MBIGOS!

Cue MVP, now on a cane, to interrupt to ask if this is the beginning of a new business arrangement or just desperation to keep Miz’s title. McIntyre says he didn’t fall for that but MVP says he is here for a reason: Miz vs. Lashley begins promptly at 9pm, so Miz has less than an hour. Miz isn’t happy but here’s Sheamus to face McIntyre, who wants to fight instead of talk. The brawl is on in the aisle with McIntyre knocking him over the barricade and we take a break before the match starts. I can go for this “we’re doing X at Y time” as it’s so, so nice to have some kind of a structure around here.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

It’s a brawl to start with McIntyre hammering away and elbowing him in the face. The referee has McIntyre back off and Sheamus knocks him down for a change, setting up a middle rope knee drop for two. McIntyre fights out of an armbar and stomps on the face before whipping Sheamus hard into the corner. Sheamus picks him up by the leg though and puts him down, only to get caught in the ropes for the ten forearms to the chest. You don’t rip off a signature move like that though so Sheamus puts him in the ropes for forearms to the chest and back.

The Brogue Kick puts McIntyre on the floor and we take a break. Back with Sheamus working on an armbar with a knee on McIntyre’s face. The Irish Curse gets two and we hit the reverse chinlock with a knee in McIntyre’s back. The comeback lets McIntyre get up and they fight to the floor, with Sheamus being suplexed onto the announcers’ table (Tom: “This is gnarly!”). McIntyre backdrops him onto the announcers’ table again and nails a top rope clothesline back inside.

Sheamus hits his own clothesline and goes up but McIntyre nips up. The Glasgow Kiss rocks Sheamus and a belly to belly superplex takes us to a break. Back with McIntyre hitting a spinebuster for two but getting kneed in the face for the same. White Noise gives Sheamus two more and he sends McIntyre face first into the buckle.

McIntyre is back up again though and it’s a super White Noise to plant Sheamus hard (with the referee immediately checking on him) for two. Sheamus is fine enough to catch him with an Alabama Slam out of the corner for his own two and they’re both down. It’s Sheamus up first so he loads up the Brogue Kick, only to have Drew Claymore him first for the pin at 23:05.

Rating: B+. These two beat the fire out of each other and it was all about two guys hitting each other really, really hard for a long time. You don’t see a Raw match get this time a lot of the time but they made it work really well. This was pay per view quality so seeing it on TV in a big time match made me smile a lot. I was worried they would have built this up for months and then not gone anywhere with it so well done on doing this here.

Post match we get the respectful staredown.

Nia Jax stares Naomi down in the back.

Naomi vs. Nia Jax

Lana and Shayna Baszler are here too. Nia runs her over to start and we’re already in the bearhug. With Naomi mostly done, the Samoan drop and powerbomb finish her off in a hurry at 2:20. Total and complete squash.

Rhea Ripley is coming.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging….but hang on because Miz has a rather bad stomach cramp and can’t see himself going to the ring right now. Adam Pearce doesn’t buy this but here’s Lashley to jump Miz. John Morrison: “SOMEBODY GET A TOWEL!” Lashley leaves him laying, but Pearce says Miz will defend the title at 10:00pm instead.

Here’s Braun Strowman for a chant before his match. He knows that Shane McMahon and Adam Pearce have a conspiracy against him. It started when he headbutted Pearce but then he wasn’t allowed in the Elimination Chamber, which sucked without him. Cue Shane and Pearce with Shane saying that he knows Braun is upset. This is all about conflict management though and the key is communication.

That’s why Strowman needs to know that it was Shane making this tag match tonight, because Pearce had nothing to do with it. Tonight, Strowman gets to team with WWE management, meaning Adam Pearce. They can do great things, and tonight they can win the Tag Team Titles! Strowman likes the idea but threatens Pearce with violence if he screws this up.

Tag Team Titles: Braun Strowman/Adam Pearce vs. Hurt Business

Strowman and Pearce are challenging and Strowman starts fast by cleaning house of the champs. Shelton Benjamin is crushed on the floor and Cedric Alexander is whipped hard into the corner. Strowman stands on Alexander’s chest and then sends him flying for a really big crash.

The running shoulder hits the post though (he’s really, really bad at that) and it’s Shelton coming in with a running knee to the face. Strowman fights off both champions without much effort though and there’s the running powerslam to Benjamin. Shane gets on the apron and demands Pearce get the tag (Pearce: “WHY??? IT’S OVER!”)…..so Shelton rolls Pearce up to retain at 3:14.

Rating: D+. This was one hundred percent an angle rather than a match and that’s ok. Pearce was only there to keep setting up Strowman vs. McMahon at Wrestlemania, which is not exactly the kind of match that is going to draw much interest. I’m rather glad they didn’t change the titles here and while it didn’t make the champs look great, it could have been worse.

Strowman is livid and storms to the back.

Elias and Jaxson Ryker come up to Damien Priest and Bad Bunny with a musical proposal. A collaboration is proposed because the two of them could be bigger than the Beatles. Bunny smirks a bit, which has Elias excited, but Priest translates to “that’s a no”.

Here are Elias and Jaxson Ryker for some music before Elias’ match, but Elias is not pleased with his lack of a Grammy nomination. That’s like Tom Brady not getting an ESPY nomination! Elias is ready to perform but gets cut off as usual.

Elias vs. Damien Priest

Jaxson Ryker and Grammy nominee Bad Bunny are here too. Priest powers him into the corner to start and grabs an armbar. The standing and seated version have Elias in trouble for a bit, followed by a spinwheel kick to make it worse. Elias bails to the floor to yell at Bunny and we take a break.

Back with Priest working on another armbar but Elias manages to send him throat first into the rope to escape. A running boot in the corner rocks Priest again and a running clothesline gives Elias two. Elias gets in a cheap shot from the floor and the chinlock goes on. Priest fights up again and strikes away, setting up the Broken Arrow for two of his own.

A rollup gives Priest two more but he gets kicked to the ropes, only to dive into a jumping knee to the face. Drift Away is countered but Elias fires off some forearms to the back. Priest doesn’t seem to mind as he kicks Elias in the head and Hit The Lights finishes for Priest at 15:20.

Rating: C-. This was far longer than it needed to be but Priest overcoming some cheating and winning in the end is all that matters. Priest is someone with a lot of potential and it seems that WWE is actually going with that for a change. Bad Bunny is the star for now, but Priest is the star for later and it is nice to see WWE doing something with that.

We look at the opening video on Miz vs. Lashley again and the first attempt at the match.

Randy Orton isn’t sure what is going on with the Fiend but knows Alexa Bliss is playing a part in it. After looking at what Bliss has been doing lately and talking about the Fiend returning, Bliss interrupts the interview and talks to a Jack-In-The Box about bringing the Fiend back. Before that though, there is something Orton should know. The screen goes nuts and a man in a hood comes up. That’s Orton, who talks to Randy (yes that’s right) and says this doesn’t end on his terms. Soon, Randy will come face to face with everything he has ever done. The real Orton starts coughing and the evil one stares at him. And moving on.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Bobby Lashley

Miz, with John Morrison, is defending and actually comes into the arena this time. Before the bell, Miz tries to talk Lashley into waiting for Wrestlemania but that isn’t happening. The bell rings, Miz drops to the floor, grabs the title and sprints to the back for the countout at 29 seconds. Well at least they didn’t waste time.

Post break Shane McMahon tells MVP and Lashley that there will be a title match tonight. MVP: “THIS IS BULL****!” If Miz tries something else, Shane will consider stripping Miz of the title.

Here’s Charlotte for a chat before her match (because everyone has something to say this week). She came back to be Asuka’s partner and didn’t want to be in the Raw Women’s Title picture. Asuka has worked so hard to be champion for the last six months, but Bianca Belair chose to face Sasha Banks at Wrestlemania. That leaves Asuka alone, so Charlotte wants the title shot. Asuka isn’t here though because Shayna Baszler kicked her tooth out last week. She knows Asuka will be back but here are Baszler and Nia Jax to interrupt.

Baszler laughs off the idea of hurting Asuka and Nia says no one likes Charlotte. She needs to understand that they are the real power around here. Charlotte knows everyone wants her gone but people don’t have to call her the best of all time. Instead, they just call her Charlotte.

Shayna Baszler vs. Charlotte

Charlotte starts swinging before the bell but Nia jumps her from behind. We take a break and come back joined in progress with Baszler hammering away in the corner. Charlotte comes back with the fall away slam and some chops but the Figure Four is broken up with a kick to the floor. Jax’s charge hits the steps and Charlotte counters the Kirifuda Clutch. Natural Selection finishes Baszler at 2:55.

So Charlotte got jumped before the match, shrugged it off, got rid of Jax, countered Baszler’s finisher and won clean in about seven minutes max (assuming the bell rang as soon as they went to a break) to survive the Tag Team Champions on her own. Yeah, it must be Wrestlemania season if Charlotte has the Supergirl cape on again. Oh and this is the second time these two have ever had a singles match (with the first ending in 56 seconds when Nia interfered). What a great way to have a dream match go down for the first time.

Shane McMahon confirms that Miz either has to fight or Lashley is the new champion.

Riddle/Lucha House Party vs. Retribution

T-Bar starts fast with a chokebreaker for two on Riddle ten seconds in. Mace comes in with Mass Effect for two, followed by another backbreaker from T-Bar for two. Riddle gets up and makes the hot tag off to Dorado to pick up the pace, setting up a very fast tag to Metalik. An elbow off of Dorado’s shoulders finishes T-Bar at 2:05 in another fast match.

Post match Mustafa Ali yells at Retribution and at Riddle, which means we’re not done yet.

Riddle vs. Mustafa Ali

Non-title and Ali starts fast by working on Riddle’s arm. A dropkick to the arm and a running neckbreaker gets two. It’s back to the arm with a Fujiwara armbar as we get another countdown to Lashley vs. Miz, telling you that this match isn’t lasting long. Riddle pulls him into a choke but gets reversed into a cradle for two. Back up and Riddle kicks him in the head, setting up the running forearms in the corner. The Broton gets two more on Ali but Slapjack gets on the apron for a distraction. Mace does the same and Ali hits kind of a reverse super X Factor for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: C-. Well I’ll give them credit: they waited a full eight days before having the new champion take a pin. At least it wasn’t clean and Ali might be able to get a bit of a boost out of this, but I have no reason to believe Retribution is going anywhere out of this. Hopefully Riddle can rebound soon, because he needs to rebound eight days after becoming US Champion.

Miz comes in to see Shane McMahon and complain about what is happening. He wants to know what kind of match it is going to be, but Shane isn’t sure yet. That sends Miz further over the edge as he talks about everything he can do for the company, only to get this treatment. Shane says good luck, champ.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Bobby Lashley

Miz is defending and here’s Shane McMahon to make it a lumberjack match. The bell rings and Miz tries a belt shot but Lashley pulls it away. With Lashley looking ready to end him, Miz heads to the apron, only to come back in for a shot to the face. That sends Miz bailing to the floor and tries to bribe the lumberjacks but gets tossed back in.

Lashley blasts him with a clothesline and hits the shoulders in the corner before throwing Miz outside again. Retribution won’t help him but the Hurt Business will throw him back inside. A Downward Spiral sets up right hands to Miz’s head and Lashley presses him to the floor. Retribution throws him back in this time and there’s the spinebuster. The Hurt Lock makes Lashley champion at 3:04.

Rating: D. They didn’t have a choice here as it was either going to be here or at Fastlane. Lashley has been ready to be WWE Champion for the better part of twenty years now so finally giving him the title was the right call. You should know where this is going for Fastlane and Wrestlemania, but maybe now the freaking out over Miz winning the title can end.

Post match Lashley beats him down again and celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The opener was good and the title change was important, but that more or less ends the positives on the show. It was a bad night for champions (four losses in the last five matches) and some of the things the show did made me glare at the screen for longer than I should have needed to. This show was kind of a mess, but they got the important parts right. Now if only they could get the other stuff right too, they might be somewhere.

Results

Drew McIntyre b. Sheamus – Claymore

Nia Jax b. Naomi – Powerbomb

Hurt Business b. Adam Pearce/Braun Strowman – Small package to Pearce

Damien Priest b. Elias – Hit The Lights

Bobby Lashley b. The Miz via countout

Charlotte b. Shayna Baszler – Natural Selection

Riddle/Lucha House Party b. Retribution – Elbow drop to T-Bar

Mustafa Ali b. Riddle – Super head slam to the mat

Bobby Lashley b. The Miz – Hurt Lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 1, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and that means we only have two more pay per views to go before Wrestlemania because Elimination Chamber and Fastlane both need to be things. Edge won the men’s Royal Rumble and has a decision to make, which very well may come tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

Here’s Drew McIntyre to get things going. Drew talks about how we are on the road to Wrestlemania and goes over how great each match was last night. Cue Edge to interrupt him though and McIntyre praises him for everything Edge did for him over the years. Drew was here when Edge had to retire and then he was in the Rumble last year when Edge returned.

Edge says he likes Drew but what is wrong with him? Winning the Rumble last night means that Edge can challenge Drew for the title. So why isn’t Drew kicking his head off right now? Cue Sheamus to interrupt and ask Edge who he is to question Drew. Edge has been sitting at home while Drew carried this company all year. Drew may take the high road but that’s not what Sheamus is going to do.

Edge won last night, so he can make a decision or Drew can do it for him. That isn’t happening tonight, but everyone will know when he makes his decision. Either way though, Edge is walking out of Wrestlemania SA champion. Edge leaves, and Sheamus Brogue Kicks McIntyre, likely setting up the Elimination Chamber title match.

Post break, Sheamus says he and Drew aren’t friends anymore and he wants the WWE Title. Drew Gulak is waiting with Sheamus’ bags and Sheamus leaves.

US Title: Riddle vs. Bobby Lashley

Riddle is challenging and MVP is here with Lashley. They start fast with Riddle getting caught in a delayed suplex but managing a hurricanrana to the floor. There’s the Floating Bro from the apron and Lashley is in more trouble. Back in and Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock over the ropes but Lashley doesn’t break for the DQ at 1:48 (Riddle seemed to tap anyway).

Post match Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock again to knock Riddle out, with MVP telling Lashley that he went too far. Lashley grabs it for a third time and drops Riddle onto the barricade.

We look back at Asuka and Charlotte losing the Women’s Tag Team Titles to Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax last night.

Bad Bunny is here.

Back from a break and Riddle doesn’t even remember who he was facing.

Randy Orton can’t believe Edge pulled it off last night but the bigger problem is Edge made Orton look like a liar. See, Orton had promised that Edge wouldn’t be back but here he is again. Orton beat Edge up time after time because he loves him like a brother and tried to get him out of this business. Edge isn’t going to main event Wrestlemania because tonight there will be no mercy or compassion. They meet tonight.

Kofi Kingston is here with Xavier Woods tonight when Woods faces Ali and Retribution again.

Mustafa Ali vs. Xavier Woods

Retribution and Kofi Kingston are here too. Ali punches him down to start but gets clotheslined out to the floor for his efforts. Back in and Ali grabs a running neckbreaker, followed by a running neckbreaker for two more. Woods fights back up and strikes away before swinging into a Russian legsweep to drop Ali again. Ali is right back up but can’t hit the tornado DDT. T-Bar breaks up a pin attempt so Kofi goes after him, allowing Woods to grab a crucifix to pin Ali at 4:07.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here as Retribution takes another loss after going on a nice mini winning streak. I know this is leading to Kofi vs. Ali at some point, but it might be nice to build Ali up a little bit rather than tearing down any minor thing he builds up. The match was fine and at least the finish wasn’t entirely clean, but let Ali have a winning streak.

Damian Priest and Bad Bunny are chatting in the back.

We look back at the opening sequence.

Here are Miz and John Morrison for MizTV. They get straight to the point this week and bring out Bad Bunny as the guest. We look at Bad Bunny’s performance last night, plus Miz and Morrison getting on his nerves, causing him to dive on them in the Royal Rumble. Back in the ring Bunny confirms that he wants to be a wrestler, so Miz talks about mentoring Daniel Bryan to all of their success.

They’ll help Bunny get into wrestling if he helps them record an album. Miz: “We get Grammys and you get Slammys.” Morrison samples a bit of their Spanish rapping abilities but Bunny isn’t interested. Miz goes on a rant about how this is their ring but Bunny says he’s only here because his friend wants to be a guest. Cue Damian Priest to take out Miz and Morrison and we have a match.

Damian Priest vs. The Miz

Priest wastes no time in knocking Miz to the floor for the step up flip dive to take out both Miz and Morrison. Back in and Miz fights back but Priest isn’t having that and hits the running elbow in the corner. The Broken Arrow gets two but a Morrison distraction lets Miz get in a cheap shot. Miz goes for the briefcase but Bunny takes it away. Bunny hands it to Morrison and hits him with the microphone. The Reckoning finishes Miz at 4:26.

Rating: C. This was about establishing Priest and if having Bad Bunny as his friend helps that along then so be it. I don’t know anything about Bunny but he seems to be quite the big deal in the music world at the moment. If that helps Priest along then great, because Priest is the kind of guy who could be a heck of a star on Raw. A good debut helps that and it worked out well enough here.

Long video on Alexa Bliss going all evil.

Tag Team Titles: Hurt Business vs. Lucha House Party

The Hurt Business is defending and MVP is on commentary. MVP ignores a question about Lashley to talk about Bad Bunny before saying he has never seen Lashley go that far before (MVP: “But I like it.”). Shelton throws Dorado around to start but gets kicked in the face. Metalik comes in off of Dorado’s shoulders and (eventually) gets in a hurricanrana to take Benjamin over. Everything breaks down in a hurry and the House Party knocks the champs to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Shelton hitting a gutbuster for two on Dorado, with MVP shouting “GO BACK TO THE RIBS”. Some knees in the corner keep Dorado in trouble but he finally knocks Shelton down long enough to get over for the tag to Metalik. The pace picks up with a rope walk hurricanrana to Alexander. Dorado dives onto Shelton, who catches him out of the air, meaning Metalik has to dive onto both of them. Back in and Metalik rolls Alexander up for two but Alexander runs him over. Shelton tags himself in again though and Paydirt finishes Metalik to retain the titles at 11:13.

Rating: C. Hey, did you know that Alexander and Benjamin are champions who don’t get along? I’m not sure if WWE has pounded that into your head well enough by doing the same thing every single week since they won the belts in the first place. Throw in MVP questioning Lashley earlier in the night and I’m a bit scared about the Hurt Business’ future.

We look at Charlotte and Asuka losing the Tag Team Titles again.

Charlotte is focused on winning the Tag Team Titles and takes the blame for getting distracted by Ric Flair and Lacey Evans. Asuka is frustrated over the loss because she was ready last night. Charlotte says it’s time to get the titles back.

Charlotte/Asuka vs. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Naomi/Lana

The winners get a future Tag Team Title shot. We get an inset promo from Lana and Naomi, with Lana giving one of the most scripted, forced, unnatural statements ever about how they’re a team. Naomi isn’t much better, but that Lana one was as rigid as I can remember in a long time. Charlotte runs Naomi over to start so Mandy and Asuka tag themselves in. Both of them try dropkicks so Mandy grabs a rollup for two.

Lana and Dana tag themselves in and oh dear. Lana misses a few kicks to the face and gets sent into the corner for the handspring elbow. Mandy and Brooke clear the ring and we take an early break. Back with Charlotte grabbing the Figure Four necklock and rolling Dana over for a tag off to Mandy. Charlotte gets taken into the corner but escapes a double suplex without much effort. Asuka comes in for the running hip attack to Rose in the corner, followed by the Shining Wizard for two.

It’s quickly back to Charlotte to run Lana over for a few near falls but Lana reverses a powerbomb into a hurricanrana. Naomi gets the hot tag and starts to clean house before it’s back to Lana, who is promptly kicked in the face. Everything breaks down with a parade of shots to the head. Natural Selection drops Dana….and here are Ric Flair and Lacey Evans for another distraction. Charlotte goes after them so Naomi hits the Rear View to finish Asuka at 11:10.

Rating: C-. Well at least Mandy and Dana didn’t take another fall, and since the idea of Charlotte taking back to back falls is horrible and atrocious, Asuka was the only other sacrificial lamb. Thank goodness we’re picking up the Lana vs. Jax feud again though, because that needed to keep going after the six week break. Otherwise we might have left dozens of people waiting for the big culmination.

A sad Drew McIntyre talks about his ten year friendship with Sheamus, including the two of them spending Christmas together in a diner because they had no one else. If Sheamus wants the match, he has it. No date given.

Video on Carlito.

Jaxson Ryker/Elias vs. Jeff Hardy/Carlito

Carlito takes Elias down to start and it’s off to Hardy to go after the arm. It’s off to Ryker for two off a suplex and Elias comes back in to elbow Hardy in the back. Carlito gets knocked off the apron to keep him angry as Elias hits a sitout chokeslam for two on Hardy. Ryker misses a middle rope splash though and it’s back to Carlito to start cleaning house. A faceplant cuts that off so Elias comes back in and rolls Carlito up for two. Carlito flips out of a suplex though and hits the Backstabber, setting up Hardy’s Swanton to finish Elias at 5:53.

Rating: C. I was never a big Carlito fan but he looks a heck of a lot better this time around, at least physically. If he can put in the effort and try to make another run work, WWE might have picked up a hidden gem. He looked pretty good here, though that was in a rather small dose. Not bad though, and that’s a fine way to start your run back.

Long video on Edge’s retirement, return and feud with Randy Orton setting up last night’s Royal Rumble win.

Edge talks about how great it was to come back last night and get this far, but there has always been a black cloud hanging over both himself and his family. That black cloud is Randy Orton and tonight he is going to deal with it so he can go back to Wrestlemania and get back a title he never lost. Tonight he gets closure on why he can’t carry his daughters to bed or play soccer with them because he’s finishing things with Orton.

Nikki Cross vs. Alexa Bliss

Cross asks Bliss what she wants from her and takes her down with a headlock. Bliss slips out and smiles at Cross, who runs her over with a crossbody. Back up and Bliss pops her with a right hand, meaning it’s a bit of a cheer before Bliss gets two. After a “well shucks/fiddlesticks” look from Bliss, she steps on Cross’ back and then sends her face first into the mat a few times.

A bit of hopscotch into a kick to the ribs gets two more and we hit a bodyscissors. Back up and Sister Abigail is broken up….and then Bliss turns back into the Goddess. Bliss says it’s her and offers a hug but gets kicked in the ribs, followed by a clothesline. Then it’s back into Funhouse Bliss so the smiles are on again. Sister Abigail into a DDT finishes Cross at 6:43.

Rating: D. Remember when Mick Foley had the Three Faces Of Foley and would transform from one personality to another when he was pushed too far or became comfortable enough that another could come out? Well screw all of that because what one of the most creative gimmicks of all time really needed was magic that let him change his look, style and gear in the blink of an eye. I’m a bigger Bliss fan than most but egads this is getting really, really annoying. Bring crowds back just to get rid of this nonsense.

Bliss goes to leave post match but runs into Randy Orton on the way to the ring for the main event.

Randy Orton vs. Edge

Edge goes straight at him to start and hammers away, setting up the standing choke that he used back in April. Orton breaks that up and chokes him down in the corner, followed by more choking on the rope. Edge snaps off a quick Edgecution for two but the spear is countered into a scoop powerslam. They take it outside with Orton sending him into the steps and we take a break.

Back with Edge in trouble but hitting a clothesline out of the corner. The RKO is countered into the Edge O Matic for two and Edge knocks him off the apron into the barricade. Edge follows and gets poked in the eye, allowing Orton to drop him onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Orton sends him throat first into the bottom rope, followed by the hanging DDT. And now Alex Bliss is on the top rope with black fluid spilling out of her mouth. The spear finishes Orton at 16:02.

Rating: C+. These two always work well together and that was the case again here, even with whatever Bray Wyatt’s latest idea with Bliss is, even if no one but him has any idea what is going on. Edge is going on to something bigger and better at Wrestlemania so it’s nice that he can put the Orton thing behind him rather than having some other big pay per view match between them. I wouldn’t be shocked to see that happen again, but at least they gave Edge the win here.

Overall Rating: C-. This show wasn’t great, but it was still one of the best Raw’s in a long time due to cutting out a lot of the nonsense and having something to build towards over the next few weeks. Throw in Miz and Morrison being confined to the midcard where they belong at the moment and WAY less of the Bliss/Orton shenanigans and it was a lot easier to watch. Not a good show, but by comparison, it worked wonders (in other words, Smackdown on Monday).

Results

Riddle b. Bobby Lashley via DQ when Lashley would not let go of the Hurt Lock in the ropes

Xavier Woods b. Mustafa Ali – Crucifix

Damien Priest b. The Miz – Reckoning

Hurt Business b. Lucha House Party – Paydirt to Metalik

Naomi/Lana b. Dana Brooke/Mandy Rose and Charlotte/Asuka – Rear View to Asuka

Carlito/Jeff Hardy b. Elias/Jaxson Ryker – Swanton to Elias

Alexa Bliss b. Nikki Cross – Sister Abigail DDT

Edge b. Randy Orton – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 28, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

It’s the last Raw of the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. The big story coming out of last week saw Sheamus attacking Keith Lee, which did not sit well with WWE Champion Drew McIntyre. That would seem to be setting up a title match at the Royal Rumble, but we have over a month to hammer down the details. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Jon Huber.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Drew McIntyre to get things going. McIntyre talks about how this has been a pretty crazy year for him. We hear about what he has done this year and next week is starting with a bang as he is defending the title on Legends Raw. Here’s Sheamus to interrupt and McIntyre doesn’t want to hear the platitudes. They have known each other for fifteen years and next week they are ready to face off for the title, like they have always wanted to. Sheamus says he just has to Brogue Kick Keith Lee tonight so they can start next year the right way.

Cue Lee (McIntyre: “You had to know this was coming.”) to say he didn’t like getting kicked in the head last week. He’ll wait for the bell tonight to extract an apology, but he does say Sheamus might stab Drew in the back. Sheamus says he kicked Lee last week for always running his mouth about how he was going to turn on Drew. The argument makes McIntyre say let’s get a referee down here and do this now. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Lee before the bell and Drew isn’t happy. Of note: McIntyre got in a Luke Harper “yeah yeah yeah” for a rather nice tribute.

Sheamus vs. Keith Lee

The winner gets a shot at Drew McIntyre, on commentary, next week. Lee shoves him down to start but gets hit in the ribs, setting up a quickly broken armbar. Sheamus kicks Lee down again and stands on his face to set up another armbar. Back up and Lee suplexes him to the floor, setting up a posting. Sheamus knees him down on the way back in though and a top rope clothesline puts Lee onto the announcers’ table.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus hitting the ten forearms to the chest. Sheamus goes up top but misses an ax handle, allowing Lee to pounce him down. The spinebuster gives Lee two but the Spirit Bomb is blocked. Instead it’s something like a crossbody for two on Sheamus and a better version connects for the same. Back up and Sheamus manages White Noise but loses a battle of headbutts. The Grizzle Magnum sets up the Spirit Bomb to give Lee the pin and the title shot at 12:54.

Rating: B-. There’s something great about two big guys hitting each other really hard for a little while and that’s what they did here. Lee getting the shot is certainly interesting, even if it seems likely to be a path towards a triple threat at the Royal Rumble (or Sheamus getting a shot of some kind). Either way, nice hoss match here, which is all it needed to be.

Lee goes out to see McIntyre post match and the title is held up.

Miz vs. Gran Metalik

John Morrison and Lince Dorado are at ringside. Miz is rather distraught over losing the briefcase so Metalik grabs some rollups for early near falls. A headscissors sends Miz to the floor and there’s a dropkick to put him down again. Metalik adds a moonsault to the floor but Miz hits a big boot back inside. A second big boot sets up a reverse chinlock and Miz throws in a bunch of trash talk. Back up and Miz misses a shot, allowing Metalik to grab a sunset flip for the upset pin at 3:22.

Rating: C-. Metalik was flying all over the place to start and the upset was a nice touch. What matters most here was going with a bit of a surprise, even if it is more about Miz than Metalik. I’m curious to see where this is going for Miz, but it’s nice to see him getting featured at a more appropriate level. At the same time, I could go for more of the luchadors but that isn’t likely to be the case.

AJ Styles and Omos interrupt Elias’ practice and Jaxson Ryker isn’t happy. AJ says Elias is more like Johnny Trash and a match is set for later.

Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler

Mandy Rose is in Brooke’s corner. Brooke slaps her in the face to start but the cartwheel splash hits knee. Baszler cranks the arm across the apron and slaps on an armbar back inside. The Kirifuda Clutch goes on from the floor with Mandy yelling at Baszler. The arm stomp misses so Brooke takes it back inside for a running flip neckbreaker for two. Brooke has to bail out of something off the top though and it’s a jumping knee into the Kirifuda Clutch for the tap at 3:32.

Rating: D+. Brooke is trying rather hard but there is no reason to believe that she is going to be able to beat someone like Baszler. That makes these matches rather boring to watch as you can only have so much reason to believe that it’s going to work. Brooke has come a long way, but the gap is still far too big for her to cross.

Long video on Randy Orton vs. the Fiend with Alexa Bliss hinting that the Fiend will be back.

Here’s Alexa Bliss with Alexa’s Playground because she too needs another talk show. Bliss talks about how the Fiend is gone but he’ll be back someday. Maybe next week at Legends Raw, because he wants to meet his hero, Hulk Hogan. Fiend has been taking his vitamins and saying his prayers, but Bliss doesn’t want to know what he prays to. After her own “yeah yeah yeah”, Bliss introduces Randy Orton, who doesn’t come out.

Bliss does it again and again there is no Orton. Bliss finds this rude, but we go to the Firefly Fun House, where Orton walks through the door. That’s not cool with Bliss, and Orton makes it worse by kicking Huskus the Pig away. Orton laughs at the idea that the Fiend could come back and throws Mercy the Buzzard out the window, taking out Abigail in the process. Orton ribs Ramblin Rabbit’s head off as Bliss challenges Orton for tonight. Orton thinks this is where Fiend is supposed to return, so he accepts.

We look at Nia Jax attacking Charlotte to put her on the shelf six months ago.

Charlotte is ready for revenge, even against someone like Jax. Asuka comes in to celebrate the new year because Jax isn’t ready for Charlotte.

AJ Styles vs. Elias

Omos and Jaxson Ryker are here too. AJ strikes away to start but gets caught with a backdrop for one. They head outside with Elias sending him arm first into the post as we take a break. Back with Elias hitting a top rope Meteora to set up a chinlock. AJ gets sent outside so Omos offers some intimidation.

They head back inside with AJ hitting the Phenomenal Blitz into the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. Drift Away gives Elias the same but the Pele catches him on top. A quick TKO gives Elias another two but AJ goes to the apron for a forearm. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Elias at 14:02.

Rating: C+. This deserves the same complaint that I have about a good number of AEW matches: it didn’t need to be this long and felt like they were extending it out for the sake of extending it out. Elias looked pretty good here, but it’s kind of hard to believe that AJ is going to need fourteen minutes to beat him. The match was far from bad, but cut something like this down.

We see a clip from Raw Talk with Ricochet talking about how frustrated he is with losing all the time. Something needs to change.

Mustafa Ali says Ricochet needs to change.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ricochet

The rest of Retribution is here too. Ricochet hammers away to start and hits an early powerslam for two. The dropkick gets two but a Retribution distraction lets Ali knock him into the corner. Mace shoves Ricochet off the top for a crash and we take a break. Back with Ali grabbing a chinlock but Ricochet fights up and manages a moonsault into a German suplex to put them both down.

A hard clothesline drops Ali as well and the Kick Back connects, only to have Mace pull Ali out. The rest of Retribution gets on the apron so Ricochet tries a springboard DDT to T-Bar off the apron, which only somewhat connects and nearly kills T-Bar. Ali gets dropkicked into the post and another tornado DDT drops Mace with another scary landing. Back in and Ricochet’s shooting star press hits Ali’s knees, setting up the Koji Clutch to knock Ricochet out at 11:50.

Rating: B-. They had me believing in Ricochet again there near the end and that’s a pretty impressive trick. They’re doing something with Ricochet fighting against the team but I’m not sure where it ends. I can’t imagine Ricochet joining the team, but at least Retribution and Ricochet are FINALLY doing something for a change.

Post match Ali offers Ricochet the chance to join Retribution, earning himself a no and the Recoil.

Nia Jax says she has some goals: beat Charlotte, get the Tag Team Titles back, and (Shayna Baszler: “There’s a #3?”) enter the Royal Rumble to go on to Wrestlemania. Baszler likes the sound of that idea.

We look at Keith Lee becoming #1 contender.

Drew McIntyre says everyone has been waiting for Lee to step up, but he might not like what he finds up there. Lee can beat anyone when he is motivated, except Drew of course. See you next week.

Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Asuka and Shayna Baszler are here too. Nia powers her around to start so Charlotte grabs the arm. That’s broken up with power so Charlotte starts slugging away to knock her outside. Baszler and Asuka come over as Charlotte sends Jax into the post. Back in and the Figure Eight is easily countered with a shove into the corner and we take a break.

We come back with Jax hitting a sitout powerbomb (with the feed going black for a bit, possibly due to Charlotte’s gear having some issues) but Baszler and Asuka get into a brawl. Charlotte avoids the legdrop and tries the Figure Eight but Baszler comes in with the Kirifuda Clutch for the DQ at 10:52.

Rating: C. You can probably pencil in the rematch for the Tag Team Titles for the Rumble, even if it might not be the most thrilling story. Jax just wrestles the same match far too often and it brings down what value she has. Charlotte needs to shake some rust off, but she’s going to be the focal point of the division until Becky gets back at least so she doesn’t have much to worry about.

The Hurt Business chases off another random guy in the back.

Angel Garza has a rose when Charly Caruso comes up for an awkward reunion. Garza won’t say who the rose is for but here are R-Truth and the merry band of numskulls to knock the rose out of his hand. The petals are on the floor so Garza hands it to her anyway, saying it’s the thought that counts. Caruso doesn’t seem impressed.

We look at Big E. winning the Intercontinental Title on Smackdown.

Riddle, Jeff Hardy and New Day try to come up with a four man team name.

Riddle/Jeff Hardy/New Day vs. Hurt Business

During the entrances, Bobby Lashley declares for the Royal Rumble so he can main event THIS YEAR’S Wrestlemania. Cedric Alexander dropkicks Riddle down to start but walks into a gutwrench suplex. Lashley comes in to shoulder Riddle down and it’s off to Shelton to drive him into the corner. Riddle takes Shelton into the corner for a change and the Unicorn Stampede is on, capped off by Hardy’s slingshot dropkick.

Everything breaks down and house is cleaned, with the Hurt Business being knocked outside. Lashley has to be held back and we take a break. Back with Lashley hitting a Downward Spiral for two on Riddle and handing it to Shelton for a half crab. Cedric’s reverse chinlock doesn’t last long as Riddle comes back with a kick to the head. Kofi comes in off the hot tag to clean house, including the Boom Drop to Alexander.

Woods makes a blind tag and Kofi dives onto Shelton. Everything breaks down again with Woods taking out Cedric and MVP at the same time. Jeff dives off the top onto MVP and Woods nails Alexander with the discus lariat (Tom: “A big Harper clothesline!”) and Hardy adds the Swanton. Lashley makes the save and Shelton knees Riddle off the apron. The Twist hits Shelton and Lashley comes back in, only to have Hardy block the spear. That’s fine with Lashley, as it’s the Hurt Lock to finish Hardy at 14:27.

Rating: B-. They were hitting another level with that everything breaks down sequence and it went on for a lot longer than something like that usually does. I’m not sure how much value there is in having Hardy tap out tot he same hold again but they kept Riddle and Lashley looking strong, which is what matters most. The Hurt Business continues to be one of the best things in WWE today and the more I see of them next year the better things will be.

Post match the brawl stays on with Riddle hitting the Final Flash to Lashley so the team can escape.

John Morrison tries to perk Miz up but saying John Cena lost to Kevin Federline doesn’t help. Adam Pearce comes up with the Money in the Bank briefcase…..because he’s here to return it to Miz. It turns out that Miz is right so he’s Mr. Money in the Bank again. Celebrating ensues.

Here is Alexa Bliss so Randy Orton can answer her challenge. Orton asks where Fiend is but Bliss says this is about her. She goes outside to find a present, which contains gasoline. Bliss challenges Orton to do to her what he did to him but Orton doesn’t move. Bliss pours the gasoline on herself and says light the match.

Orton still won’t move so she calls him a little b**** and pours the rest of the gas on herself. Orton: “You think I won’t do it?” He talks about how much he loves to hurt people so if Bliss wants to join the Fiend in h***, he’ll make her join him. There go the lights so Orton lights the match….and that’s it. Dang when is the last time they had an actual cliffhanger???

Overall Rating: B-. This was an up and down show as they didn’t have some of the best efforts on parts of the card. What matters here though is it feels like they are focused on the Royal Rumble and that’s a good thing. WWE does far better when they have something to focus on and you can get a long way based off having people announced for the Rumble. I’m curious to see where some of these stories go though and since there is no football on next week, some people might actually watch the show for a change.

Results

Keith Lee b. Sheamus – Spirit Bomb

Gran Metalik b. Miz – Sunset flip

Shayna Baszler b. Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch

AJ Styles b. Elias – Phenomenal Forearm

Mustafa Ali b. Ricochet – Koji Clutch

Charlotte b. Nia Jax via DQ when Shayna Baszler interfered

Hurt Business b. New Day/Riddle/Jeff Hardy – Hurt Lock to Hardy

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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