Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One (2022 Redo): I Remember Those People

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Bebe Rexha

This is somewhere in between a Performance Center Wrestlemania and the regular version, as the show is taking place in front of a limited capacity audience. That alone is worth a look and now it is time for a Wrestlemania style show. The main event for the first night is Bianca Belair challenging Sasha Banks for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Let’s get to it.

No Kickoff Show matches (on either night) this year, which is a little weird to see.

The huge pirate ship set looks awesome, as WWE knows how to use what is available to them.

Here is Vince McMahon, with the roster behind him on the stage, to talk about how bad things have been over the last year. As we emerge from this pandemic, WWE would like to thank the fans for sticking with them and WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA! Very nice and you know it’s a big moment when the boss is out there for something like this.

Bebe Rexha, with a guitar player, singe America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how the WWE Universe has waited a long time to get back here, and now they are back for the spectacle and the passion. Wrestlemania is back in business (there’s a tagline for you). Tonight we will see an event that is bigger than the history of history.

That line is so bad that the voiceover from last year (with a bad Jack Sparrow impression) takes over to say this is a continuation from last year with wrestlers fighting for immortality. Now let’s drop some realness (as the kids say, because apparently kids say that), because tonight we continue a decades old spectacle.

That sets up the Wrestlemania highlight package, but first we need to thank the fans, including those in a commemorative chair or watching tonight on Peacock. The course has been corrected and this can’t be stopped. Sparrow voiceover: “Now how’s that for a cold open?” The original voiceover wants a big finish though so how about this: WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA!

Commentary welcomes us to the show….which is being delayed due to a weather delay, because of course it is. The fans bust out the ponchos and start heading for the concourses as this is quite the change of plans. With nothing else going on, commentary talks about Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley getting to start the show but since we have some time to fill, we’re going to get some special interviewers backstage.

Shane McMahon talks about how he hasn’t been bullying Braun Strowman and is ready to take him out tonight. MVP and Bobby Lashley interrupt to say that tonight will be the crowning moment of the Almighty Era. Drew McIntyre only understands violence and tonight, Lashley is going to give him that. McIntyre pops in and says Mother Nature can’t save Lashley so let’s do it back here.

MVP and Lashley are taken out and McIntyre talks about how he is trying to keep his emotions together and won’t lose it last year. Last year they were at the Performance Center and he won the WWE Title, lost it for three weeks and got it back, but now the weather is trying to hold him back again. Lashley is losing the title tonight. You can tell that McIntyre isn’t comfortable improving.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about how important the show is.

New Day is fired up about having the crowd back and you can’t feel that feeling until you feel it. They accepted AJ Styles and Omos’ challenge because they are fighting champions and don’t care how big or phenomenal their challengers are. No one can hang with them and here is Big E. to glare at interviewer Kevin Patrick, plus hype up how great the rest of the team is. It nearly turns into a sermon, as Patrick seems a bit scared.

Cole dubs the show Wrestlerainia but seems to be alone in that one.

Braun Strowman says he’s ready to get out there and destroy Shane McMahon for the sake of everyone who has ever been bullied. This isn’t going to be pretty or technical, because Shane is going to be beaten into an inch of his life. Tonight, he’s proving that bullies do not win.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about Vince McMahon’s speech.

Kevin Owens, rocking that KO Mania V shirt, takes the microphone from Kevin Patrick to talk about his history with Sami Zayn. They have known each other for almost twenty years and they started wrestling each other all over. One time they wrestled each other in front of 23 people in Owens’ hometown. They went to New York City, to Peru and around the world, but in those twenty years, no two people were talked down to by “industry experts” like they were.

Now they are here and tomorrow night they get to do it again at Wrestlemania. It has never been this big or this important but this isn’t the Sami that he has known. That’s ok though, because in the end, this is Wrestlemania and it’s Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Tomorrow night, Owens is Stunning some sense back into Zayn and if Logan Paul wants to try something, he’ll be in the ring. To the point, eloquent, and it told the story of their match. This stuff can be done with zero scripting and if the people can handle that, I have no idea why they aren’t given the chance.

Michael Cole and Samoa Joe, in ponchos, hype up the show being on in less than five minutes. In a good note for the two of them, Byron Saxton’s microphone has died.

Bianca Belair isn’t nervous but she knows she is getting in the ring with Sasha Banks. Belair doesn’t run from competition so tonight, she is proving that she is the best. Not too bad here.

Seth Rollins can’t remember Kevin Patrick’s name (Rollins: “It’s Mike right?”) but he loves the chaos of Wrestlemania. He isn’t happy with hearing about Zazaro Swinging him a record number of times but it was probably to help Zazaro springboard to a new level. Tonight the clouds will clear and the sun will shine down on the new Mr. Wrestlemania.

Miz and John Morrison aren’t worried about Bad Bunny and Damian Priest because they’re stars. BE JEALOUS!

The Kickoff Show panel gives us one more quick hype.

Now this is kind of interesting, because the Peacock version of the show has the weather delay with the promos as its own video (which is billed as the start of the show). Vince’s speech and America the Beautiful are on the regular video of the show and there is no mention of the delay, though the video with the delay references Vince’s speech. Because WWE.

Speaking of Because WWE, the opening video is on both the weather delay video and the regular Wrestlemania video.

Since we can’t just GET ON WITH IT ALREADY (and because the fans need to get back in their seats), here are hosts Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, with the latter not getting the most positive reaction. Titus is fired up to be in his hometown and the WWE Universe is bringing the energy that they need. After one year, one month and one day, we are back live! Hogan doesn’t think the fans heard him so Titus says it again to a stronger reaction. They hype up the opening match with the Hurt Lock vs. the Claymore and wonder what happens when the Hulkamaniacs run wild for TWO NIGHTS!

We recap Bobby Lashley defending the WWE Title against Drew McIntyre. Miz cashed in Money in the Bank against McIntyre and won the title, only to lose it to Lashley eight days later (which was about as obvious of a result as you could have, as there was no way Miz was going to Wrestlemania as champion). McIntyre is getting his rematch, with Lashley trying to have the roster take McIntyre out before the show. That didn’t work, and now it is time for the showdown.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. They fight over the power lockup to start until Lashley runs him over with a shoulder. The overhead belly to belly works a bit better for McIntyre, who throws in a bit of a crude gesture. Some shoving goes to McIntyre but Lashley hits him in the face to cut that off. A running clothesline takes Lashley to the floor, where he is fine enough to drive McIntyre into the barricade a few times.

Back in and a neckbreaker gives Lashley one (because McIntyre doesn’t wait for two) before he sends McIntyre into the corner. The charge takes too long though and the arm goes into the post. A Codebreaker to the arm sets up a failed cross armbreaker attempt so McIntyre goes with some clotheslines instead. There’s the overhead belly to belly and then another one has Lashley in more trouble (as we see commentary standing at ringside for some reason, likely weather related).

The Futureshock is blocked though and Lashley hits the spinning Dominator for two of his own. McIntyre gets planted with the big spinebuster for two more but he’s right back with the reverse Alabama Slam. They go up top with the superplex being broken up so McIntyre puts on a Kimura up there instead. Lashley knocks him out so McIntyre does the situp toss back down (that always looks cool).

Back up and Lashley hits another spinebuster but, after a few seconds (good), McIntyre nips up for the staredown. Another belly to belly sends Lashley down again and now the Futureshock can connect. McIntyre isn’t done though as he rolls two more Futureshocks for two so it’s time to load up the Claymore. Lashley bails outside to avoid the whole kick in the face thing, only to have McIntyre hit a big running flip dive to the floor to take out Lashley and MVP at the same time.

Back in and the Hurt Lock is blocked so Lashley sends him flying again with a suplex. The Downward Spiral looks to set up the Hurt Lock again but McIntyre rams him into the corner for the break. A third spinebuster is countered into the Kimura, which is broken up as well for another double knockdown. McIntyre wins a slugout but MVP offers a distraction, allowing Lashley to duck the Claymore. The Hurt Lock goes on and McIntyre is in trouble, with even the flip out of the corner not breaking it up. McIntyre finally passes out to retain Lashley’s title at 18:21.

Rating: B. This was the heavyweight slugfest style match as you had two big men beating on each other until one of them couldn’t keep going. It was hard hitting, it was a heck of a fight, and it was about who could stay on their feet. That’s how you open the show and it felt Wrestlemania worthy, even if the ending wasn’t the best thing. Heck of an effort here though and this one stuck with me even over the last year.

Titus O’Neil is backstage with the NWO (Hogan/Hall/Nash/Syxx) and offers them a spot on Ding Dong Hello. She’ll settle for a Too Sweet, but only Hall and Syxx take her up on it before leaving. I forgot how good Bayley was as a heel.

Tag Team Turmoil

Five teams and the winners get a Women’s Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. Lana/Naomi are in at #1 (they both like to dance) and Billie Kay/Carmella (after Kay FINALLY found a partner to pay off her amazing resume deal) are in at #2, with Kay not being exactly great at trying to match Carmella’s more suggestive entrances (but there was nothing for her to do in WWE because reasons). Carmella takes Lana into the corner to start and beats her down, only to have Lana slip away from Kay.

The hot tag brings in Naomi for the pull someone’s face into the back of her tights (because WE’RE HAVING FUN) before handing it back to Lana. This proves to be a bad idea as Lana can’t time kicking Kay down so Kay rolls Naomi up (with an assist from Carmella) for the elimination at 2:19.

The Riott Squad (Liv Morgan/Ruby Riott) are in at #3 with Morgan kicking Kay in the face (take notes Lana). Kay manages to put her down in the corner so though so Carmella can do her moonwalk into the dropkick. That doesn’t last long as Morgan fights up and hits a Codebreaker, only to hold Kay on top. Riott adds a top rope backsplash for the pin at 4:58 (total) but Carmella superkicks Morgan down after the fall.

Dana Brooke/Mandy Rose are in at #4, with Mandy infamously slipping on the ramp (edited out here, because WWE doesn’t make mistakes). An early Blockbuster drops Dana but she’s right back with a running flip neckbreaker for two. Riott grabs a sunset flip for the same and it’s Morgan coming in to pick up the pace. A Codebreaker into the Riott Kick gets two with Brooke having to make the save.

Rose gets in a kick to the ribs in the corner though Rose slips on the middle rope. Brooke slaps Rose in a rather personal area for a tag (sure why not) before a superplex drops Morgan. Not that it matters though as Morgan reverses into a small package for the pin at 9:17. After the ring announcer says the Riott Squad was eliminated and then issues a correction, Natalya and Tamina complete the field at #5.

Morgan rolls Natalya up for two but it’s off to Tamina for a sitout powerbomb. Tamina gets taken into the corner though and it’s the Codebreaker into the backsplash for two, because Tamina doesn’t get pinned you see. The superkick sends Morgan outside and there’s the Hart Attack to Riott. The Sharpshooter is loaded up but Natalya hands it off to Tamina for the Superfly Splash and the final pin at 14:06.

Rating: D. Egads man. The Women’s Tag Team Titles have been good for about three months out of the nearly three years they have been around and that is the case again here. Natalya and Tamina are about as interesting as the dogcatcher and the The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, but they need to go over the Riott Squad, Kay and Brooke/Rose, because of course they do. This match was frustrating and bad on top of that, as you have a bunch of thrown together teams (and the Riott Squad) fighting for a shot against another thrown together/oddball team. Just drop the titles already.

Get vaccinated!

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro. Rollins got swung around a bunch of times so he pointed out that Cesaro had never had a Wrestlemania Moment (whatever definition we’re using for it this year) in the form of some campaign ads of who you should approve of more. The match was set up as a result, with Cesaro wanting his big shot.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

Cesaro hits a running uppercut to start and knocks Rollins to the apron for a bonus. There’s a knee lift but Rollins snaps the arm across the top rope to take over. Back in and Cesaro’s superplex is countered into a Buckle Bomb for two as Rollins turns up the sneering. The top rope superplex into the Falcon Arrow gives Rollins two but Cesaro is back up with another uppercut.

The Swing (you knew that was coming) sets up the Sharpshooter but Rollins makes the rope. Rollins drops him again and hits a corkscrew frog splash (that’s a new one) for two of his own. Cesaro is right back up with a Neutralizer for two, setting up the shocked kickout face. Another attempt is countered into a quick Pedigree to give Rollins his own near fall and they’re both down (as long as he doesn’t start countering Pedigrees, we should be ok).

Rollins shouts about how he survived the Neutralizer and the Swing, setting up a missed running kick to the face. That’s fine with Rollins, who swings his leg back and kicks Cesaro in the back of the head instead (cool). The Stomp is countered into the uppercut so now it’s the torture rack swing (with no hands, because THAT’S SOMETHING ELSE HE CAN DO). The 23 rotation Swing sets up another Neutralizer for the pin on Rollins at 11:27.

Rating: B-. They got the result right as there was no way Cesaro was coming back from losing after everything Rollins said about him. The problem is that if this was going to mean anything, it needed to come about six years earlier. I’m happy to see Cesaro get his win, but it’s really hard to buy that it is going to mean anything beyond maybe the next few weeks. Good match though, which shouldn’t be a surprise given who was in there.

We look at Jey Uso winning the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, plus Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler retaining the Smackdown Tag Team Titles, last night on Smackdown.

Ziggler and Roode pick AJ Styles and Omos to take the Raw Tag Team Titles from New Day.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos

New Day (Xavier Woods/Kofi Kingston) is defending and this is Omos’ in-ring debut. Kofi and Omos start but Woods chants at Styles and gets him to start instead. Styles can’t get the Calf Crusher early on so they trade rollups instead. A belly to back suplex sends AJ face first onto the mat and it’s time for some Francesca from Woods. That’s enough for Woods to come in and grab a headlock, allowing him to shout about how they are cutting the ring in half. Styles fights up and tries to get over for the tag but Woods realizes that could cause a variety of damage.

Woods drags him back to the corner before sending Styles to the floor, setting up a dropkick through the ropes. Kofi keeps Styles down and a springboard splash to the back gets two. UpUpDownDown is loaded up but Styles kicks his way out and crawls over to Omos for the tag, despite Woods’ protests.

The tag brings in Omos (Kofi: “YOU GOT THIS WOODS!”) and Woods’ kicks have no effect. Kofi’s top rope chop is pulled out of the air and a backbreaker has Woods’ back bent over Omos’ knee. A side slam drops Woods again and Styles comes back in with a Phenomenal Forearm off of Omos’ shoulders to knock Woods silly as this isn’t going well for the champs. A standing Sky High sets up the pin with one foot to finish Kofi for the titles at 9:45.

Rating: C. The match might not have been the best, but the story it told worked well. What mattered here was having Omos look like an unstoppable monster and they nailed every bit of that side. What they didn’t nail was the part where Styles, who could probably beat either member of New Day with a limited amount of trouble, was treated like Jesse to Omos’ Festus. The Omos stuff worked, but the Styles half really didn’t work.

Styles sits on Omos’ shoulders for the cool visual after the match.

GET VACCINATED!

The cage is lowered.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman. Shane decided that Strowman was stupid and bullied him for the beat you over the head story of the show. Then Shane slimed him (as poured green goo over him) but their match at Fastlane was postponed to here due to Shane’s knee injury. This story was dumb and designed to put the focus on Shane, because of course it was.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Inside a cage with pinfall, submission or escape and Jerry Lawler joins commentary. As Lawler makes every joke about Strowman being stupid that he can think of, Jaxson Ryker and Elias (Shane’s goons) jump Strowman with chairs on the floor. A chair is thrown in with Strowman so the beatdown can be on. Strowman takes the chair away but Shane kicks him in the leg and takes over again because he’s Shane McMahon.

Shane’s escape attempt doesn’t work so he punches and kicks Strowman down in the corner. Another escape attempt is broken up but this time Shane pulls a piece of sheet metal off the top and beats Strowman down with that instead. Strowman fights up again and hits him in the face, with Shane being nice enough to sell for a few seconds. The running powerslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, allowing Shane to send him face first into the cage.

A DDT drops Strowman and Coast To Coast hits Strowman in the ribs. Shane goes for the climb so here are Ryker and Elias to help him over but Strowman knocks them off the cage. That makes Shane fall back inside too but of course he’s fine enough to get up again. This time Strowman follows, only to find a well placed toolbox (at least there would be a reason to have that up there) and knock Strowman off.

That’s enough for Shane to get over the top, where Strowman grabs him by the hand and then rip the cage open (that’s a new one) to pull him back inside. Strowman pulls him to the top of the cage and throws him down for the huge crash. Instead of climbing out though, Strowman climbs down, gives a speech about how this is for everyone who has ever been called stupid. The running powerslam finishes Shane at 11:26.

Rating: D. I for one enjoyed seeing the Shane McMahon Show here, as this was giving me Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax at Wrestlemania XXXIV vibes. This should have been Shane getting in a few shots off the interference and then being crushed like an old can. Instead, it was Shane beating on Strowman and getting in all of his stuff before Strowman beat him up to win. As usual, it was about Shane first and then everyone else, because that’s the Wrestlemania tradition we need to continue.

Here are some fireworks as the cage is raised.

Commentary talks about the Hall of Fame induction but Bayley interrupts, saying she can do Cole’s job better. She throws us to the induction ceremony video, with various people talking about how great this is.

Here is this year’s class:

JBL (long overdue)

William Shatner (not here but at least he did some stuff in wrestling before)

Bella Twins (who can’t quite do their dance in those dresses)

Jushin Thunder Liger (not here but he should be in every Hall of Fame)

Titus O’Neil (Warrior Award, as the man is a saint)

British Bulldog (again, how was he not already in)

NWO (yeah they’ll do as headliners)

Wrestlemania XXXVIII is in Texas.

Bad Bunny/Damian Priest vs. Miz/John Morrison

Booker T. is on commentary. Bunny is one of the hottest rappers in the world and a lifelong WWE fan. He performed his song about Booker T. so Miz and John Morrison wanted some collaboration. That wasn’t happening, so they broke his DJ’s equipment. Bunny eliminated them from the Royal Rumble and then picked up Damian Priest as a partner, setting up the big showdown. Miz and Morrison also destroyed Bunny’s really expensive car to make it…well material rather than personal in this case.

As for tonight, an army of bunnies hop to the ring, albeit with ears (and a head) falling off, leaving the rest of them to hold their big bunny heads on, because that’s how WWE does things. Miz and Morrison show up to do their Hey Hey Hop Hop rap live, which was a catchy song. On the other hand, Bunny rides into the stadium on the top of a semi truck for a pretty cool entrance.

Priest backs Miz into the corner to start but Miz wants Bunny instead. That’s exactly what he gets, with Bunny looking more comfortable than I would have expected. Miz sticks his chin out so Bunny hits him in the face (Morrison: “Rabbits are lucky! That was luck!”) before another right hand knocks him into the corner. The frustration is on so Bunny tackles him down and hammers away. Miz gets a bit more serious but this time Bunny grabs an armdrag.

Morrison isn’t happy and tells Miz to act like they’re the best tag team of the 21st century. A rather spinning headscissors takes Miz down again so Morrison comes in for a change. That means a headbutt to send him into the corner and a running elbow….is elbowed out of the air to put Bunny in trouble for the first time. The pace slows down a bit as Miz gets to mock Bunny and then rip at his face. Bunny fights out of a chinlock but Miz hits the big boot to cut him off again.

Another shot knocks Bunny to the floor and Morrison busts out a Spinarooni, meaning Booker gets in his catchphrase. Priest makes the mistake of looking at the crowd and gets knocked down by Miz, allowing Bunny to get dragged back into the corner. Bunny gets a boot up in the corner though and a tornado DDT out of the corner gives him a breather. That’s enough for the tag to Priest to start cleaning house, including the toss suplex to send Miz into Morrison.

The South of Heaven chokeslam gets two on Miz as everything breaks down. Stereo head claps set up stereo Broken Arrows for two on Miz and Morrison with the villains rolling outside. Of course that means the big dive from Bunny but Priest gets knocked down back inside. Morrison pulls Bunny to the floor, where Bunny hits a Canadian Destroyer to leave Miz stunned. Back in and a Doomsday crossbody finishes Miz at 15:03.

Rating: B. It was longer than it needed to be and Bunny selling the first ten minutes was certainly a choice, but this was WAY up there on the celebrity match list. Bunny clearly put in some effort and time as he looked good with the stuff he was doing out there. It was more him doing moves than wrestling a match but for a one off, this was a very successful debut. Bunny is the celebrity and is going to get the attention because he is the reason the match is taking place, but he more than delivered here and it was a very impressive showing.

We look back at Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley from earlier in the night.

Here’s what’s coming tomorrow night.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the Royal Rumble and gets to challenge for the title, with both of them talking about how they’re the rest best around here. This was a simple story but it was set up well, with Belair being treated as the next big thing but needing to conquer the current big thing.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Belair is challenging and we get the Big Match Intros. They fight over the lockup to start until Banks pulls her down, only to have Belair nip up. Belair takes Banks down instead but has to bail out of a standing moonsault. Banks sends her to the apron for a neck snap across the top and a ram into the post, setting up Banks’ big dive to the floor. That’s fine with Belair, who catches said dive and gorilla presses Banks for a walk up the steps (that’s not normal, at all).

Back in and Banks gets in a few shots of her own, setting up some rights and lefts on the mat. The double arm crank keeps Belair down so let’s hit the wide shot to show off the SNICKERS logos. Banks goes up top so Belair brings her right back down with the big crash. They head outside where Banks uses the hair to pull Belair into the post, only to miss the running knees against the barricade.

Back in and Belair grabs a VERY delayed suplex, complete with a slingshot and muscling Banks back up before taking Banks back for the double knockdown. Banks is up first and grabs the hair, which is used to pull her into a clothesline from Belair. A standing shooting star hits Banks and a release Glam Slam drops her again. Belair’s 450 only hits knees though and they’re both down again. Back up and Belair is fine enough to hit a pair of powerbombs for two, meaning they’re down again.

This time it’s Banks up first with a double springboard tornado DDT (that was cool), with the kickout leaving her stunned. The frog splash (with Cole thinking it was a Meteora) gets two on Belair and now frustration is setting in. They head outside with Banks sending her into the steps before taking it back inside for the Bank Statement. Belair looks more scared than hurt and it’s made even worse as Banks rolls into the middle. You don’t do that to Belair, who rolls forward to make the ropes for the break.

Belair drives her into the corner with straight power but can’t hit a Stratusphere. Instead Banks gets her into the Tree of Woe but misses the Alberto double stomp. Now Belair can hit her 450 for two, meaning it’s her time to scream in shock. The KOD is loaded up but Banks sticks the landing, so Belair is done playing. The big whip with the hair rocks Banks and now the KOD gives Belair the pin and the title 17:27. Ignore Cole shouting about a kickout.

Rating: B. There was a lot more laying around in this one than I thought but they did a good job with Banks’ natural skills vs. Belair’s power/athleticism. This was making me think of Asuka taking the NXT Women’s Title from Bayley back in 2016, as Bayley was great but Asuka was that much better and overwhelmed her. Very good match and the first time a women’s singles match has headlined the show to give it the historical aspect.

The big celebration is on to end the show, complete with Belair’s family in the front row for a nice touch.

Overall Rating: B-. Overall the show is good, but there are some rather part parts that hold it back. You can only get so far with stuff like the Tag Team Turmoil match and the cage match, which both dragged on and didn’t seem to be the hottest stories in the first place. Other than that, it is the same problem as last year: having the show split in half takes away the feeling of this being the biggest show of the year. I get why they’re doing it, but egads it doesn’t feel as special. The good matches here are more than enough to carry it, but this is far from a classic.

Ratings Comparison

Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-

Redo: B

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: D

Redo: D

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

Redo: B-

AJ Styles/Omos vs. New Day

Original: C+

Redo: C

Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: D

Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest

Original: C

Redo: B

Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Almost everything is about the same save for Bad Bunny/Priest, which is better than I remembered.

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXVI (2024 Edition): It’s Better Than I Remember

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

So last year at Wrestlemania XXV, Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker had one of the best matches ever. That means it’s time for a rematch, with Michaels career on the line. That is more than big enough for a special match, to the point where it makes John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title feel that less important. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Beretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Prime is out within seconds, followed by Beretta and Croft at the same time. Henry launches Chavo out but then gets tossed by Khali. A bunch of people get together to toss Khali before Cryme Tyme gets rid of Gallows. Then Shad tosses JTG because that’s how battle royals work. Regal and Finlay slug it out for old times’ sake before everyone breaks off for fights of their own.

Masters keeps putting people in the Masterlock and is eliminated for not being that bright. Kozlov eliminates Kidd and Hart-Smith before being tossed out as well. Funaki, Goldust, Regal and Shad are out in a row, with Reks following them. Santino starts using the Cobra and thankfully is tossed out by Finlay.

Archer gets rid of Yang and is quickly dropkicked out by Tatsu (Striker continues to try and get “The Poison Fist Of The Pacific Rim” over as a nickname for Tatsu. This is because Striker is really annoying.). Knox gets to clean house for a bit but cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to get in a shillelagh shot. The Tadpole Splash hits Knox and Finlay tosses Carlito. Ryder eliminates Finlay and Knox at the same time, leaving Tatsu to kick Ryder out at 8:43.

Rating: C. It’s a battle royal to get a bunch of people on the show. They didn’t waste time here and it gave the fans something to see during the pre-show, which is about all you can ask for here. Tatsu was someone who seemed like he was ready to move forward more than once but it just never came together. It’s not like this was some big win but he was as good of a winner as you could have had.

Fantasia sings America The Beautiful. Not well but she does sing it.

The opening video talks about what it means to be at Wrestlemania and how important it is to be here. This is the big chance and the stars will seize it.

The set has something of an ancient pyramid theme with another over the ring, both of which look cool. If nothing else, I’ve always liked I Made It.

Tag Team Titles: ShoMiz vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

ShoMiz is defending and there isn’t much of a story here, save for Truth and Morrison winning a triple threat match to get the title shot. Miz and Morrison start things off with Morrison getting the better of things. Truth comes in with a top rope legdrop for two into a WHAT’S UP. It’s off to Show, who sends Truth flying with a fall away slam. What looks to be a Vader Bomb is broken up via a Morrison kick to the head, followed by Morrison’s knee to Miz’s head. Show breaks up Starship Pain though, leaving Truth’s dive to Show to fail miserably. Back in and Show KO Punches Morrison for the pin to retain at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one and it really would have been better off as a pre-show match. They didn’t even get four minutes and there is only so much you can do with the amount of time you might get on a regular TV show. ShoMiz was a fairly forgettable team and while it was nice to have the titles on the card, it’s not like this was anything remotely memorable.

Video on Wrestlemania Week, which always looks cool.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Legacy implodes as Orton has had it with the two of them screwing up and turned on them, setting up this for some revenge. DiBiase and Rhodes go after him to start and it doesn’t go well early on. Orton gets smart by dividing and conquering but walks into a dropkick from DiBiase. The double teaming is on with both of them taking turns to punch Orton while the other holds him back. There’s a double suplex to put Orton down but he fights out of the corner (the fans approve).

The comeback doesn’t last long though as DiBiase hits a clothesline, setting up a High/Low to put Orton down again. Rhodes snaps off an Alabama Slam for two and the save from DiBiase means it’s time for the young hooligans to fight. Orton fights up and sends DiBiase to the floor, followed by a snap powerslam back inside. There’s the backbreaker to Rhodes but DiBiase pulls Orton outside. Rhodes’ dive only hits DiBiase so Orton hits the double hanging DDT. With DiBiase down on the floor, Orton Punts Rhodes and then RKO’s an invading DiBiase for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. There wasn’t much in the way of drama here once DiBiase and Rhodes got in their offense. Orton looked like he was toying with them at the end, which was part of the reason why he was turning into a popular star all over again. This was about Orton smashing through his former lackeys and showing them who the real star was, which he did in quite the destruction by the end.

Vickie Guerrero and company are ready for their ten woman tag. Jillian Hall comes in for a song and whole thing turns into a Slim Jim commercial, with Santino Marella having a bite to change Jillian. First she’s Mae Young, then Gene Okerlund (yes in the same dress) and finally Melina. Wacky….I guess you could call it fun? This isn’t on the Network due to the music.

Money In The Bank

Christian, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shelton Benjamin

This is the last Wrestlemania MITB match before it would go on to get its own show this same year. It’s the usual melee to start with almost everyone going outside. The first ladder is sent inside about thirty seconds in but a bunch of people stop to go after McIntyre rather than climbing. Almost everyone tries to go up but gets stopped, with Kane chokeslamming Bourne over the top for a crash onto more people.

Swagger and Hardy get trapped behind a ladder in the corner and Christian monkey flips Kingston into the ladder onto them. Ziggler breaks it up and makes the climb but MVP pulls him right back down. Kingston hammers on Kane in the corner, earning himself a powerbomb onto a ladder. Benjamin goes up this time so it’s Swagger spearing him with another ladder to break it up.

Swagger gets caught under a ladder so Hardy and Christian hit him with a ladder each. One of the ladders is bridged into another, with Bourne kicking Christian off the bridged version. Air Bourne hits Christian and Bourne goes up, only to be cut off by Hardy. Swagger cuts Hardy off though and shoves him onto the bridged ladder for the huge crash. Shelton and MVP go up but come crashing down, leaving everyone on the floor for a bit.

Kane goes up but has to cut off Ziggler, including a chokeslam onto the ladder. With Kane distracted, Kofi comes back in to kick him in the head but the only ladder available is broken. Kofi gets crazy creative by using the pieces like stilts and jumping up the rungs, only to have McIntyre make the save.

McIntyre goes up but Hardy shoves the ladder over for the big crotching on top. It’s Matt going up this time until Christian is there as well but they both have to knock Kane down. That’s not enough for Christian, who hits the reverse DDT off the ladder to plant Matt again. Christian goes up again, only to have Swagger make the save and pull the case down for the win at 13:29.

Rating: B-. It was a wild match as usual but there is only so much you can do with ten people in a match trying to get in as much time as possible. The stilts spot was very unique and stood out more than anything else, though the rest was little more than the usual big spots and crashes. Swagger winning is a surprise, but WWE was trying something new and that’s often a good idea.

We look back at last night’s Hall Of Fame ceremony.

The Class of 2010 is introduced:

Stu Hart (represented by eight relatives)
Wendi Richter (seems very happy to be there)
Mad Dog Vachon (sadly in a wheelchair)
Antonio Inoki (not the strongest reaction)
Bob Uecker (nice reception)
Gorgeous George (represented by his former wife)
Ted DiBiase (by far the strongest reaction)

Sweet goodness that Hall of Fame theme is always awesome.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. After debuting on Raw and winning the WWE Title within a few weeks, Sheamus was knocked out of the Elimination Chamber by HHH, costing him the title. Sheamus then went on to talk about how much he loved watching HHH while growing up. Then Sheamus laid him out, which HHH liked because it’s what he did when he went after the Ultimate Warrior in 1996 (and yes they explained how badly it went). That plus a need for revenge makes for a Wrestlemania match.

HHH vs. Sheamus

HHH’s entrance goes on for a good while, as you might have expected. Sheamus drives him into the corner to start but HHH hits him in the face. It’s way too early for the Pedigree though as Sheamus bails out to the floor. Back in and a suplex drops Sheamus again, setting up the knee drop for one.

HHH goes old school (shocking I know) as we hit the Figure Four, with Sheamus going straight to the ropes. The fight goes outside with HHH being whipped into the steps, followed by the (yet to be named) Irish Curse back inside. An ax handle to the head cuts HHH off again and Sheamus grabs the armbar.

We’ll make that a chinlock but HHH suplexes his way to freedom, sending Striker into a FAR too long….whatever you call what he does. HHH grabs a DDT and they’re both down, followed by the expected slugout. There’s the running knee into the facebuster for two and a neckbreaker drops Sheamus for the same.

The yet to be named Brogue Kick misses so HHH tries the Pedigree, only to be reversed into the Brogue Kick for two. The fans are rather behind HHH, who fights out of the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) and gets two more off a spinebuster. Sheamus rolls out to the apron and manages another Brogue Kick…but takes too long and gets Pedigreed out of nowhere for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This is the type of match that will work almost every single time as you had two big strong guys beating the fire out of each other until the ending. That’s the kind of brawl that both of them know how to do (though Sheamus would get WAY better later on) and it worked here. That being said, Sheamus is the up and comer and loses to HHH, which seems to be a bit counterproductive, but this would hardly be the first time that happened.

We recap CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio. After Mysterio cost Punk a spot in Money In The Bank, Punk scared the heck out of Mysterio’s daughter Aliyah. They then traded various attacks before Punk creepily sang Happy Birthday to Aliyah, which was too far. Now it’s time for their fight, with Mysterio having to join the Straight Edge Society if he loses.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has the Straight Edge Society (Luke Gallows and Serena) with him and talks about how these 70,000 people here are going to drink or try pills to make their problems go away. He can be their savior and lead them to a better place because he chooses to be drug free and better than everyone here. Mysterio is one of the Na’vi from Avatar, which isn’t quite the same as the superhero gear he tends to use.

Gallows offers an early distraction and Punk gets to stomp away in the corner before tying Mysterio in the Tree of Woe. A missed charge results in a crotching against the post though and they head to the floor…where Punk drops him face first onto the steps. Back in and Punk hammers away for two and we’re already in the chinlock. Mysterio fights out like he’s a top star who was in a chinlock and hits the springboard seated senton.

Punk snaps off a powerslam for two before hitting one heck of a kick to the head for the same. Four more near falls have Punk rather frustrated until Mysterio is up with a springboard moonsault DDT for two of his own. Mysterio’s frog splash misses to give Punk two more, meaning it’s time for even more frustration. Back up and Mysterio loads him up for the 619 but has to take out the Society. Not that it matters as the 619 into the springboard splash finishes Punk at 6:30.

Rating: C+. Another match that was good but they didn’t have the time to do very much. It had the stakes and they work well together, but there is only so much they can do when they have less than seven minutes. It makes perfect sense to have the loudmouth holier than thou heel get what’s coming to him and who better to do that than one of the resident superheroes?

We recap Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon. Hart returned after thirteen years of bitterness after the Montreal Screwjob and of course Vince McMahon couldn’t let it to. Hart wanted to fight Vince at Wrestlemania but got turned down, only to have his leg broken in a car wreck in the parking lot. Then Vince agreed to fight him….and then Hart revealed he was gold bricking, because that’s just what Hart does.

Vince McMahon vs. Bret Hart

No Holds Barred. Hold on though as Vince grabs a mic and says he’s hired a bunch of lumberjacks, in the form of various members of the Hart Family. As a bonus, Bret’s brother Bruce can be guest referee! Bret isn’t overly shocked and says what’s done is done. If there is one thing about the Harts though, it’s that they got paid up front and the money is already in the bank.

If there is one thing he’s learned from the Montreal Screwjob, it’s there’s nothing better than a good double cross. The Harts, including Bret, are united, and tonight is the night that Bret screws Vince. The bell rings and Bret punches him down and chokes in the corner, with Vince bailing to the floor. That means the Harts can make it even worse, including a slap from Natalya (Striker: “Best luck in your future endeavors Natalya.”).

The Hart Dynasty hits a top rope Hart Attack to the floor and it’s time to throw Vince back inside. Bret works on the leg, which sends Vince outside again. This time he comes back in with tire iron but Bret knocks it away again and takes it away. Bret hammers away with the tire iron…and then does it some more…and more, to the point where unless Bret has the strength of a two year old, Vince should be in a coma.

The Sharpshooter is teased but Bret lets it go so he can use the tire iron again. Some low blows have Vince down again and let’s get a chair in there too. Bret sits down and then hits some hard chair shots to Vince’s back. The chair is bent up so Bret finally (and I do mean finally) grabs the Sharpshooter for the win at 11:08.

Rating: C. Ok so I’ve called this an A+ before because I love what they did with Vince being absolutely destroyed and not getting in a single bit of offense. This was never supposed to be anything but a massacre until the Sharpshooter…but my goodness how long did they go with the tire iron/chair shots? The thing here is that this is really only a match in name only so I’m not going to call it bad, but Bret couldn’t have mixed it up with some different stuff other than hitting him over and over with the same stuff?

A big Hart celebration ensues.

Wrestlemania XXVII is coming to Atlanta, Georgia.

Official attendance: 72,219.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Edge for the Smackdown World Title. They were partners last year but Edge tore his Achilles. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble (at #29 in a great surprise) and won, setting up his title shot here. For some reason the build for this match involved Edge saying “spear” over and over until it lost all meaning.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. They start slowly with Jericho grabbing a headlock (Jericho: “Ask him!”) but Edge is right back with some running shoulders. Jericho is back with some stompings in the corner before sending Edge outside. That’s good for a long count before Edge comes back in and gets chinlocked. Jericho slowly stomps and slaps away, which takes long enough that Edge manages to send him shoulder first into the post.

A running shoulder sends Jericho into the announcers’ table and there’s a clothesline off the apron. They head back inside and hopefully pick up the energy a bit here. Back in and Edge gets two off a super gordbuster, followed by a middle rope sunset flip for the same. Jericho goes simple by kicking him in the head but the Codebreaker is blocked. The spear is countered into a quick Walls but Edge slips out.

The Lionsault misses and Edge is right back up with the Edge O Matic for two. Jericho’s enziguri gets two more but so does the Impaler as things slow back down a bit. Jericho mixes things up a bit with a middle rope forearm to the back of the head (Edge was nice enough to look over his shoulder before Jericho jumped), only to have his own spear cut off by a big boot.

The real spear is countered into a Codebreaker for a rather delayed two. Jericho starts going after the ankle before switching to the Walls. We’ll make that a half Walls to stay on the bad ankle but the rope is grabbed. Edge’s rollup for two is also grabbed and they crash out to the floor for a breather. The frustrated Jericho grabs the belt and the referee gets distracted, allowing Jericho’s belt shot to get two. The Codebreaker to a limping Edge retains the title at 15:47.

Rating: B. This was good but it never hit that next level and it made things kind of disappointing. Edge only teased the spear once and never got a big near fall. I was expecting something a lot more epic than we got here and that just didn’t happen. There were some shenanigans due to the belt shot but this needed to be more intense and violent given what Edge was saying coming in.

Post match Jericho goes after Edge again but Edge hits a spear off the announcers’ table and through the barricade as the feud must continue.

We look at the pre-show battle royal.

Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse/Vickie Guerrero vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres/Gail Kim/Kelly Kelly/Mickie James

Get the women on the show special. Vickie bumps Gail to start and turns around to pose, only to run into Phoenix. The non-Vickie team takes turns beating on Vickie in the corner, who asks if Kelly knows who she is. That earns Vickie a kick to the ribs with McCool making the save. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of finishers, leaving Vickie crying in the corner as Beth comes up behind her. McCool makes another save and the Hog Splash (Cole’s name) finishes Kelly at 3:29.

Rating: D. Oh what else were you expecting here? A bunch of the people barely did anything, there were a bunch of Vickie fat jokes, Lawler drooled over most of them and Striker continues to try to make everything sound like the most important moment ever because it gets people paying attention to him. Terrible match and little more than a way for Vickie to keep her heat.

We recap John Cena challenging Batista for the Raw World Title. Cena got the title back in the Elimination Chamber but Vince McMahon allowed Batista an immediate title shot. Now it’s time for the fair rematch, with Batista talking about being tired of Cena being the star when they got big at the same time. You can pretty much ignore all of those details though and just go with “It’s John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.”

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and Cena’s big entrance is from the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. We get the Big Match Intros before they fight over a lockup. Batista grabs a headlock before running Cena over, only to have Cena come back with a headlock of his own. That’s broken up and Batista sends him hard into the corner for the running clothesline to the back of the head.

Some cranking on the neck has Cena down but he manages a release suplex (that didn’t look great) and the bulldog connects for two. It’s way too early for the AA though as Batista reverses into a DDT for two of his own. A chinlock with a bodyscissors keeps Cena down for a bit, only to have him power up and start slugging away. Batista sticks with what has been working by grabbing a neckbreaker for two more.

The front chancery keeps Cena in trouble until he powers up again. The STF goes on out of nowhere but Batista grabs the rope like a bad villain should. Batista is fine enough to hit a spear for two before loading Cena up top. The superplex attempt is blocked and Cena hits a super Five Knuckle Shuffle of all things.

Batista gets back up and hits his namesake Bomb for two, giving us a great shocked face. Back up Cena counters another Batista Bomb into the AA (toss variation) for two, leaving them both down. Cena goes up but dives into a spinebuster (how Batista injured Cena’s neck a few years ago), only to have the Batista Bomb reversed into the STF (with Cena giving him a LONG talk) for the tap at 13:29.

Rating: B. It’s good and they were getting to the big stuff but I was expecting longer than just shy of fourteen minutes. Cena getting the title back is the right way to go for him though as he can put someone else over rather soon. Batista was not quite what he used to be but these two instantly make for an epic feel. Not a classic match, though they didn’t do anything wrong with the setup and finish going rather well.

Cena poses with a guy in a WE HATE CENA shirt for a funny moment.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker. Shawn lost to him the previous year before, leaving Shawn obsessed with having to get the win. It is so big that Shawn is willing to put his career on the line against the Streak, saying he doesn’t have a career if he can’t beat the Undertaker. Not that it matters as this feels absolutely huge and you know it’s going to go well.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ. The entrances are absolutely epic and you know that you’re about to see something special. They also take their sweet time getting to the ring and it builds up even more, with Shawn staring at Undertaker the entire way to the ring. Undertaker charges at him to start but Shawn is right there with the chops. Shawn gets flipped into the corner, setting up Snake Eyes into the big boot.

Old School connects but Undertaker comes up limping a bit. The chokeslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, with Shawn wisely kicking away at the leg. The Tombstone is broken up as well so Shawn starts in on the shoulder, which is a bit of an odd choice given UNDERTAKER IS LIMPING.

Undertaker slips out but has to block a quick superkick attempt as things reset a bit. The logic kicks in as Shawn starts going after the knee in the corner but Undertaker clotheslines him to the floor. The Taker Dive is loaded up but Shawn comes back in to take out the knee in a rather smart move. It’s too early for the Figure Four and they head outside, where Shawn is rammed back first into the post. The apron legdrop connects but Shawn goes after the leg again to take over.

Now the Figure Four goes on until Undertaker sits up. Shawn: “No.” And Undertaker goes back down. Well that was polite of him. Undertaker turns it over so Shawn wisely lets go and they take a breather. Back up and they strike it out until Undertaker grabs a quick chokeslam for two. The Tombstone is escaped again though and Shawn grabs the ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker finally uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom so Shawn sends him outside. A springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air so Undertaker hit the Tombstone on the floor to knock Shawn silly. Medics come out to check on Shawn but Undertaker isn’t having that and throws him back inside for two, meaning frustration is setting in. This might have more of an impact if MATT STRIKER WOULD SHUT UP for once, but instead he needs to keep shouting what he thinks sound like highlight reel worthy lines.

The Last Ride is loaded up but Undertaker’s knee gives out and they crash down, with Shawn getting two off a faceplant. Shawn’s top rope elbow only hits raised knees, which have Undertaker in even more pain. Hell’s Gate goes on but Shawn flips over into a rollup for two. Shawn hits a quick Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere for two but another attempt is countered into a heck of a Last Ride for two more.

They go outside and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. That takes too long though and it’s a superkick to knock Undertaker onto the table instead. In something that couldn’t possibly go wrong, Shawn goes up and moonsaults down onto Undertaker, mostly hitting his feet/lower legs, which does tie into everything so far. Shawn realizes he has a chance and throws Undertaker inside and hits a clean Sweet Chin Music (that has to be the fourth or fifth) for two, with Cole telegraphing the kickout by screaming that Streak was over.

Another superkick is countered into a chokeslam but Undertaker can barely move, let alone cover. Instead it’s a Tombstone (with tongue) for two and we get another stunned face. Shawn can’t get up so Undertaker loads up the throat slit….but stops. Undertaker tells him to stay down as Shawn pulls himself up and then slaps Undertaker in the face, admitting that he can’t do it and basically telling Undertaker to finish him off. The jumping Tombstone does just that at 24:00.

Rating: A+. What do you want me to say here? This is an absolute masterpiece and one of the best matches either of them have ever had if not their best ever. The leg stuff played a role throughout until Shawn gave it everything he had but just couldn’t do it in the end. It told an amazing story with some great action, including multiple near falls where you could buy it being over. It’s better than I remember it being and one of the best main events in Wrestlemania history.

Undertaker needs the ropes to get to his feet and Shawn finally gets up. Undertaker says something to him we can’t see and they hug before Undertaker leaves him alone in the ring. Shawn gets to soak in the THANK YOU SHAWN chants before doing the long walk up the ramp. Shawn: “I’m gonna drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” He looks back again and walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a weird show as there isn’t much that is Wrestlemania worthy. Edge vs. Jericho is just good, Money in the Bank is its usual ok self, HHH vs. Sheamus is a slightly above average power brawl and Batista vs. Cena wasn’t even fifteen minutes long. Those are the high points though, as the rest of the show is pretty much mediocre/forgettable to bad. That doesn’t make for a great Wrestlemania, but this show is usually pretty well remembered.

That’s because of the main event and my goodness does it deserve the praise it receives. I’ve seen it a few times now and it pulled me in again with how epic of a showdown they were having here. It felt like a Wrestlemania main event match and you do not get those very often. That match alone makes this Wrestlemania worth seeing, though I would definitely recommend fast forwarding a good bit of the midcard, as it was quite the miss in multiple places.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: D+
2024 Redo: C

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: C

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B-
2024 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: B+
2024 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: A-
2024 Redo: B-

That’s quite a drop for the overall rating but some of the lower matches just don’t hold up as well.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXIV (2023 Edition): That Felt Like Wrestlemania

Wrestlemania XXIV
Date: March 30, 2008
Location: Citrus Bowl, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 74,365
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

This show has had a pretty strong build as the card has been all but set for a few weeks now. The bigger matches include Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Edge defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker, plus the Raw World Title triple threat match as Randy Orton defends against John Cena and HHH. Throw in Shawn Michaels trying to end Ric Flair’s career and that’s a heck of a card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Elijah Burke, The Miz, Chuck Palumbo, Snitsky, Deuce, Tommy Dreamer, Shannon Moore, Jamie Noble, Kofi Kingston, Festus, Cody Rhodes, Lance Cade, Hardcore Holly, Jesse, Stevie Richards, Trevor Murdoch, The Brian Kendrick, The Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Domino, Mark Henry, Val Venis, Kane, Jim Duggan

The winner gets an ECW Title match later in the show. The bell rings so Festus snaps, allowing him to toss out Deuce and Domino rather quickly. Khali tosses Duggan and Burke gets rid of Richards, only to get eliminated by Kane. Miz, Yang, Moore and Jesse go out in a hurry, with Venis going out somewhere in there.

Murdoch, Festus, Kendrick and Cage go as well as the ring clears out VERY fast. Henry throws Kingston on top of the pile, followed by Noble (who tries to walk on the eliminated bodies but gets knocked down), Rhodes and Palumbo. A bunch of people get rid of Khali, Dreamer and Holly, leaving us with Henry, Kane and Snitsky. Kane gets rid of Snitsky, slips away from Henry and kicks him out for the win/title shot.

Rating: D. This is one of those “let’s get everyone on the DVD” matches and they didn’t bother wasting time with anything else. Kane winning is a fine way to go as he is pretty easily the biggest name in the match. There is almost no reason to not put the title on him later in the night and at least they didn’t waste time announcing the title match in advance, as Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane is hardly some huge showdown.

John Legend sings the America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how important it is to be here, as well how much has changed in a year. It’s not do much a sequel to last year, as much as it is the grand culmination of a rather eventful year. Cool video, as WWE nails these most of the time.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

Belfast Brawl (street fight) and kind of a weird choice for an opener. JBL gets the limo entrance and we look at a quick recap of JBL attacking Hornswoggle (Finlay’s son) as Vince McMahon’s mercenary. As you might expect, Hornswoggle is back as well. They start the fight on the floor with JBL getting the better of things before the bell. Finlay reverses a whip into the steps and they’re back inside for the bell.

That means it’s time to go outside for some weapons, with JBL grabbing a trashcan for a heck of a shot to Finlay’s head. The steps are brought in but JBL gets backdropped off of them for a crash. JBL hammers him back down and grabs the shillelagh but Hornswoggle gets in a kendo stick shot for the save. Finlay shillelaghs JBL down and the fans are rather pleased, with Finlay pulling out a table to make them even happier.

With the table up in the corner, a heck of a clothesline drops JBL again but he goes outside and slaps Hornswoggle. Finlay goes nuts and unloads on JBL, who manages to grab a trashcan lid. The suicide dive (oh dear) is lidded out of the air and JBL even kicks Hornswoggle down. Back in and a trashcan shot to the head puts JBL down for a change, setting up the spear through the table. Finlay grabs the steps but JBL knocks out his knee, sending Finlay face first into them. The Clothesline From JBL finishes Finlay off.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t a classic but they beat each other up rather well and started the show off pretty well. It’s a bit weird to see JBL win as the villain comes out on top, but at the same time he’s a much bigger star than Finlay. Even from fighting underneath, Finlay beating JBL would have been a big upset. It might have been the better result though, but at least it was a solid opener.

Kim Kardashian is the guest host and talks about the Money In The Bank ladder match. Mr. Kennedy interrupts to say he’ll win again this year to become the first ever back to back winner. Kardashian laughs at him repeating his name.

John Morrison vs. Carlito vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Money In The Bank. Everyone but MVP bails to the floor to go for a ladder to start, leaving MVP to steal one of the ladder that slides in. Some shots to the face put various other people down but here is Jericho with the big ladder. That means a ladder off (?) with MVP being knocked outside, leaving Morrison to pick up a ladder and moonsault down with it onto the pile (there’s a highlight reel moment).

Back in and Jericho cuts off Kennedy’s climb but catapults him into the ladder in a bit of a mistake. Kennedy can’t get the briefcase so Morrison jumps onto the ladder for the slugout. Benjamin sets up his own ladder and joins the two of them, setting up a sunset bomb into a Tower Of Doom (geez) off the ladders. Carlito breaks up Benjamin’s climb and hits him with the GTS. MVP comes in to knock some people down but misses a running boot in the corner.

It’s Carlito getting pulled down this time so Benjamin Dragon Whips him down. Benjamin goes up until Carlito and Kennedy shove his ladder over…sending him through a bridged ladder at ringside. Kennedy, Carlito and Jericho go up but MVP shoves the ladder over, only to be taken out by Morrison as the carnage continues. Jericho gets the Walls on Morrison on top of the ladder (geez that looks painful/scary) until he has to stop Kennedy.

Hold on though as Carlito and Punk springboard onto the ladders, setting up the big crashes, including Carlito’s super Backstabber to Jericho. That leaves MVP all alone so he goes up but Matt Hardy (in gear) runs in to make the save and reignite their feud. A super Twist of Fate brings MVP off the ladder and Matt runs off through the crowd, leaving Jericho to wedge two ladders together, making kind of a big V (Daddy not included).

Morrison goes up and gets knocked down just as fast, including a crotching on top. Jericho’s climb is cut off by an apple to the face but Kennedy shoves Carlito into a ladder in the corner. Punk makes the save but gets Codebreakered into a ladder to leave everyone down. That lets Jericho go up until Punk starts the slugout. Punk gets smart by tying Jericho’s leg in the ladder and gets the briefcase for the win.

Rating: B. Yeah these matches can be interchangeable but dang they are a lot of fun. This was another spotfest and Punk winning the briefcase is about as big of an endorsement as he could have gotten here. I’d still like to see one or two fewer people in there but Benjamin getting taken out softened things a bit. Heck of a fun match and that’s all it needed to be.

We see the video from last night’s Hall Of Fame induction ceremony.

Here is the Class Of 2008 (dang that music is still great):

Brisco Brothers (how Jack wasn’t in already is beyond me)
Gordon Solie (you can’t forget that voice)
Rocky Johnson (complete with a shuffle)
Peter Maivia (I hear he’s a family man)
Eddie Graham (had to be inducted in Florida)
Mae Young (again, how was she not in before)
Ric Flair (who thankfully isn’t here to tell us about how great he is)

Snoop Dogg is having a great time here so far and he has found someone he sees eye to eye with, from movies to food to cars to everything. That would be Festus but Santino Marella comes in to threaten Snoop….who whips out a bell to send Festus after Santino. Todd Grisham asks where the bell came from so here is Mick Foley, complete with Mr….would it be Snoopo?

Batista vs. Umaga

Smackdown vs. Raw so Theodore Long and William Regal are here. Batista powers him into the corner to start and a shoulder sends Umaga outside for a breather. Back in and a spinwheel kick drops Batista for a change, followed by a splash to the back for two. The nerve hold goes on, which seems a bit early for this one. With that broken up, a powerslam from Umaga sets up…another nerve hold. The Samoan drop gives Umaga two but the Samoan Spike is blocked. Umaga misses a charge into the post, gets spinebustered, and the Batista Bomb (with Batista falling backwards) finishes him off.

Rating: D. Oh this was bad, as it was Batista laying around a lot and then doing his two big finishers. They had built this up as a big match and Batista barely did anything for most of the match. While Umaga had fallen a long way, he was able to do more than this. Normally I would complain about their lack of time, but I don’t want to imagine how much worse this would have been if it had gone longer. Pretty awful match.

We look at the tale of the tape for Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

We look at Kane becoming the new #1 contender to the ECW World Title on the pre-show.

ECW World Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Kane

Chavo is defending and loses the title to a chokeslam in a record eleven seconds. That’s how it should have gone as there was no reason to believe Chavo would be a threat to Kane.

Here’s the Carlito/Maria ad for the show you’re already watching. Weird.

Raven Symmone is very loud and introduces a bunch of Make-A-Wish kids. That’s always cool. The kids, not Symmone.

We recap Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels. Flair is still on his winning streak, as he has to retire whenever he loses his next match, so now he wants to face one of the best ever in Shawn, or he doesn’t want to be here anymore. Shawn thinks he has to put Flair down, but Flair isn’t about to go down without a fight. This include an AMAZING tribute video to Flair, set to Leave The Memories Alone. I’m not a Flair fan but dang this worked well.

Flair says his game plan is to be the man. WOO!

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Flair retires if he loses. Shawn takes him down to start and teases a strut but Flair is back up with a hammerlock. That’s reversed into one from Shawn and they get up for a standoff, complete with WOO. Flair takes him into the corner and brings up the Old Yeller line, earning a shot to the face from Shawn (busting a lip in the process).

A quick slugout goes to Shawn so he goes up top, only to get slammed off. Flair goes up and hits the high crossbody for two in a Starrcade 83 callback. Back up and Shawn sends him outside again, only to have an Asai moonsault hit the edge of the announcers’ table (as in not Flair) to do some serious damage to his ribs. The count is beaten so Flair goes right after the ribs, including a suplex for two.

Shawn knocks him outside again though and hits the moonsault off the top for another knockdown. Back in and they chop it out again until Michaels hits the flying forearm into the nipup. The top rope elbow hits Flair but Shawn can’t bring himself to fire the superkick. You don’t do that to Flair, who grabs the Figure Four, which is turned over without much trouble. Shawn sunset flips him for two more but Flair is right back to the leg, as is his bread and butter.

There’s the Figure Four again and this time it stays on a lot longer. The rope is grabbed to get Shawn out of trouble and he nails Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere. A very delayed cover gets two so Shawn loads it up again, only to have Flair fall down. Shawn’s attempt at picking him up earns himself the required low blow for two but Flair can’t follow up either.

Instead, Shawn pulls him into that inverted Figure Four of his, sending Flair to the rope for a change. They chop it out from their knees until Shawn hits another Sweet Chin Music. Shawn won’t cover so he goes to the corner, with Flair getting back up. Flair says bring it, so Shawn says “I’m Sorry, I Love You” and superkicks him for the pin.

Rating: B. This is a weird one to rate as it is a farewell for Flair, but not exactly a classic. At the end of the day, Flair has been able to wrestle a completely acceptable match for a long time now but there is a big gap between that and hanging in there on this level. It didn’t exactly feel like a classic and the drama was limited, but what we got was certainly good. The problem is that when you think of Flair vs. Michaels on the stage of Wrestlemania, you expect a bit more than “good”. That being said, Flair gets to out with a solid match on the grand stage against a legend. What more could you reasonably ask for?

Shawn immediately leaves so Flair can have the big moment. Flair kisses and hugs his family and makes the long walk up the aisle before blowing one last kiss to the crowd. Yeah it’s an emotional moment, as like him or not, Flair is still a legend and one of the last links to the glory days of the 70s/80s.

Edge talks about being at Wrestlemania VI and seeing Hulk Hogan lose in the main event. It was ok though, because it has come full circle and now he is here again. See, everyone can count on the Undertaker at Wrestlemania but tonight, he takes everything away from them, just like Hogan losing took it away from him. That makes sense.

Fireworks go off.

Maria/Ashley vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina

This is the Playboy Bunnymania match, meaning a lumberjill match with Snoop Dogg as the Master of Ceremonies. Naturally Snoop comes to the ring in what looks like a Mercedes golf cart, with most of the women following him. Santino Marella is here with the villains. Ashley drives Beth into the corner to start so Maria can come in. Melina gets sent to the floor for a quick beating from the lumberjills, setting up Maria’s Bronco Buster back inside.

Ashley comes back in and gets caught in the wrong corner. A trip to the floor goes badly for Ashley as well and Beth grabs the bearhug. With that broken up, Beth electric chairs Melina into a moonsault onto Ashley (not bad) for a near fall….and the lights go out. As in an actual lights issue, not an Undertaker cameo.

We get a spotlight as Maria (now legal) hits a crossbody for two on Beth. The Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog for two and Beth’s spear hits Melina by mistake. Ashley dives off the apron onto a bunch of lumberjills, leaving Maria to hit a top rope bulldog for two on Beth, with Santino making the save. Jerry Lawler gets up and decks Santino but Beth hits the fisherman’s buster to pin Maria.

Rating: D. Well ok then. This is one of those matches that was never going to be very good in the first place, but then it got a bit more time than I was expecting (even at five minutes) and the villains win. The match was supposed to be little more than goofy fun and you can’t have Maria get in a rollup for the pin? Just a rather weird choice and I’m not sure why they went this way.

Post match Snoop Dogg drops Santino and kisses Maria.

We recap the Raw World Title match, with Randy Orton defending against John Cena and HHH. Cena and HHH are both coming back from major injuries, with Orton having risen to the top during their absences. Now both of them are back to win the title at Wrestlemania, but Orton doesn’t quite see it that way.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena vs. HHH

Orton is defending and Cena’s big entrance this year is a marching band playing him to the ring (that’s rather cool). The bell rings and Orton hits HHH with the bell before brawling with Cena. HHH gets back up and takes Orton outside to beat him over the announcers’ table, followed by the sleeper back inside. Cena picks both of them up but HHH slips out and kicks him low. Orton is back up as well and knocks HHH down to stomp away at both of them.

Cena catches Orton up top but a HHH distraction lets Orton reverse into a sunset flip for two. Another hard shot puts HHH down and Orton hits a double hanging DDT. The RKO to Cena is countered with a shove, leaving Orton to land on HHH. The Throwback hits Orton and the top rope Fameasser takes him down again. Back up and HHH goes after Orton’s knee and slowly stomps away. Cena’s distraction lets the RKO drop HHH but Cena pulls Orton into the STFU.

Orton is about to tap so HHH grabs his hand and pulls it to the rope in a smart move. A whip into the steps takes Cena down and HHH grabs the Indian Deathlock on Orton, because of course he has to do that. Cena sends HHH over the ropes and grabs the STFU on Orton again, only to have HHH make another save. HHH grabs a crossface on Cena but gets broken up, meaning it’s time for the slugout. The FU and Pedigree are both broken up so HHH hits a face/spinebuster. Another shot to the knee takes Orton down and there’s the Pedigree to Cena….but Orton Punts HHH and pins Cena to retain the title.

Rating: B-. It’s an interesting way to go to have Orton retain, but if you want him to have him feel like a bigger main event, giving him the win at Wrestlemania makes as much sense as anything else. Orton can drop the title to one of them alter if he has to but for now, he gets the win that he needs. The match wasn’t exactly great though and felt like almost any other big time triple threat, with one person being out for most of it so the others could fight. Then Orton stole the pin, which is far too common of a finishing sequence in something like this. Not awful, but I’d call it pretty disappointing.

We recap Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr., in a package that is cut from Peacock, likely for music. Mayweather broke Show’s jaw with a punch at No Way Out so Show is trying to take him out. This is billed as the Best Fighter In The World vs. the Largest Athlete In The World and is as McMahon Freak Show style as you can get.

Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Pinfall, submission or knockout only. Mayweather comes out with his entourage and makes money rain from the sky for a festive entrance. The bell rings and Mayweather, in boxing gloves runs away to start before hitting a few shots to the ribs. Hold on though as Mayweather needs water (from a chalice, because of course) so Show beats up part of the entourage.

Back in and Mayweather goes for the right hand to the face but Show pulls it out of the air. The big stomp on the hand misses so Show grabs him by the throat on the corner. A few right hands don’t do much to Show so Mayweather grabs the required sleeper. That’s broken up so Show goes after the hand again and stands on Mayweather, which has the entourage shouting that how THAT IS AGAINST THE RULES!

The big chop in the corner drops Mayweather again and there’s a side slam to crush him. Show gets creative by dropping a leg on the arm and that’s enough for the entourage to pull Mayweather out. That goes as well as you might expect and they go back to the ring, with Mayweather being mostly done.

The entourage tries to come in and gets dropped, with a chair shot having no effect on Show. Mayweather gets the chair and drops Show (after a guy twice his size couldn’t even stagger him), setting up a low blow. Some chair shots to the head stagger Show again so Mayweather grabs brass knuckles from the entourage to knock Show silly for the knockout win.

Rating: C+. This was a total mess and incredibly entertaining throughout. There is something fun about seeing Mayweather get beaten up, even if he won in the end. It made sense to not bother trying to do anything else here than having a goofy match and that is what they pulled off. Good enough stuff here, even if it was mainly Show doing slow motion stuff and Mayweather’s entourage getting beaten up. Still though, they knew what they had here and it worked.

The attendance, as announced by Kim Kardashian: 74,635.

We recap Edge vs. Undertaker for Edge’s Smackdown World Title. The focus is on both of them being undefeated at Wrestlemania, with Edge seemingly being more obsessed with giving Undertaker his first loss rather than retaining the title. Undertaker just wants to hut Edge, as tends to be the case to anyone who has hurt him before. Like Edge, who cost him the World Title and then stole it for himself.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is defending and gets his neck snapped across the top rope to start. Undertaker hammers away back inside and starts cranking on the arm, as is his custom. Old School is broken up and Edge sends him to the apron for a shoulder into the barricade. A running neckbreaker snaps Undertaker’s neck across the top to even things up a bit, meaning Edge gets in some Wrestlemania worthy posing.

Undertaker finally gets back in, where he is caught with a missile dropkick. Edge takes too long to go up again and gets shoved to the floor, setting up the required Taker Dive. Back in and Undertaker’s banged up back means the Last Ride doesn’t work so Edge takes him back outside. There’s a drop onto the barricade, followed by the half crab to keep Undertaker in trouble back inside.

Make that a double leg crank until Undertaker kicks him away for a needed breather. Undertaker wins the slugout and Snake Eyes connects, only to have Edge hit a dropkick to block the big boot (that’s smart). The chokeslam is countered into the Edgecution for two and frustration is setting in. Back up and the chokeslam gives Undertaker two but Old School is countered again (as the theme of Edge knowing everything that is coming continues).

A superplex brings Undertaker back down but for some reason, Edge decides to punch away in the corner. The pose lets Undertaker try the Last Ride, which is countered into a neckbreaker to give Edge two. Another Last Ride attempt connects for two but the Tombstone is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. Undertaker is up again and Old School connects, only to have a big boot hit the referee (you knew that was coming).

Edge goes low and grabs a camera, which knocks Undertaker silly for….well nothing actually as the referee falls to the floor. For reasons of delusions of grandeur, Edge tries his own Tombstone, which is reversed into the real thing, with another referee running down to count the near fall. Cue the Edgeheads to get beaten up, allowing Edge to hit a spear for two. Another spear is pulled into Undertaker’s choke and Edge has to tap away the title.

Rating: A-. That felt like a Wrestlemania main event as you had Edge countering every single time but ultimately not being good enough to beat Undertaker, even with the interference. Edge had his game plan but got a bit too cocky a few times, allowing Undertaker to catch up fast. Undertaker getting his title back and vanquishing Edge in the process is a great way to close the show, and the fact that it came in an excellent match makes it even better.

Undertaker celebrates and pyro rains.

The big highlight video wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a show where there is a lot of good stuff but the bad drags it down, with only the main event really standing out as great. Other than that you have Money In The Bank doing its usual stuff, Flair’s farewell as a special moment, a freak show match with Show vs. Mayweather and a just pretty good Raw World Title match. That really isn’t enough to carry a nearly four hour Wrestlemania, leaving it as a good enough show, but far from a classic or all time show.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 18, 2008: Stiff Trapezoids

Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2022 (2023 Edition): What The Heck Was I Thinking?

Royal Rumble 2022
Date: January 29, 2022
Location: The Dome At America’s Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 44,390
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

Somehow this show was a year ago and that might be better for everyone involved. This show was absolutely not well received and I am almost scared to see just how badly this falls down. Hopefully time has been a bit kinder to it, but you never can tell. In addition to the Royal Rumbles, we have Seth Rollins challenging Roman Reigns for the Undisputed Title and Brock Lesnar defending the WWE Title against Bobby Lashley. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the Titantron on my right.

The opening video looks at how the Road To Wrestlemania begins here. As usual we get the Royal Rumble highlight reel and dang there have been some great moments over the years. The rest of the matches, which don’t mean nearly as much (as usual), get some attention as well.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Reigns is defending and is currently by himself, as Paul Heyman has jumped back to Brock Lesnar and the Usos are barred from ringside. In the name of mind games, Rollins comes to the ring to the old Shield music, complete with the through the crowd entrance and gear (Of note: McAfee talks about the Shield days and says it was “Mox”, Seth and Roman”.).

Rollins goes with the grappling to start and Reigns is frustrated early. The corner clotheslines miss for Reigns and Rollins clotheslines him to the floor. Back to back suicide dives don’t do Rollins much good as Reigns knocks him out of the air back inside. They fight to the floor again though and Rollins is fine enough to hit a quick powerbomb through the announcers’ table.

Back in and the frog splash gets two but Rollins misses the Phoenix splash. Reigns’ spear is cut off by a boot to the face though and a buckle bomb into the Stomp gets a close two. Another Stomp is loaded up but Reigns blasts him with a clothesline to cut that off. Reigns’ powerbomb gets two so Rollins laughs at him, earning the big forearms to the face. The laughter is enough to let Rollins pull him into a triangle choke, which is broken up with another hard powerbomb.

They head back outside with Rollins being sent into various things, followed by a Superman Punch for two back inside. They head outside again and the spear cuts Rollins in half. Back in and another spear is countered into the Pedigree (how Rollins beat him for the title in 2016) for a rather close two.

Rollins has to elbow his way out of a Rock Bottom attempt and kicks Reigns in the face. Another spear cuts Rollins down again….but he’s still laughing at Reigns. Rollins holds out the Shield fist so Reigns pulls him into the guillotine. The referee checks the arm, with the hand falling onto the rope for the break. Well in theory at least, as Reigns doesn’t let go and it’s a DQ at 14:23.

Rating: B. This was a good match and that shouldn’t be a shock given who was in there. Any combination of the Shield guys are going to work well together and that was on display here. They tied the history of the team in well and Rollins broke Reigns down mentally, which should set up a huge rematch down the line. Granted it didn’t and this was a one off match, but it should have set something up.

Post match Reigns is all upset and slowly grabs a chair. The big beatdown leaves Rollins laying.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and Sasha Banks (in Sailor Moon gear) is in at #1 and Melina is in at #2. They pose at each other to start before Banks dumps her in less than a minute. That leaves Banks do to Melina’s splits pose until Tamina is in at #3. Banks dropkicks her through the ropes before Tamina can get inside, setting up the Meteora from the apron. Tamina saves herself back inside but gets caught with a quick Rey Mysterio bulldog. Running knees have Tamina in trouble in the corner but she headbutts her way to freedom.

Kelly Kelly is in at #4 and it’s strange to see her as anything but the blonde. Kelly comes in for the short form screaming headscissors but stops to dance, allowing Tamina to run her over. For some reason Kelly tries the triangle choke over the ropes on Banks and gets dumped for not thinking that through. Aliyah is in at #5 and hits a weird looking standing Thesz press to hammer on Banks. Tamina slaps Aliyah and they grapple against the ropes as Liv Morgan is in at #6.

Morgan knocks everyone down and stops for a bow, allowing Banks to hit Three Amigos. Queen Zelina is in at #7 and kicks Banks out in a pretty big upset. Tamina can’t eliminate Aliyah as Bianca Belair is in at #8. A kick to the head rocks Tamina and Belair muscles Vega up for a suplex. Belair’s handspring kick to the face can’t get rid of Morgan but she does hit Vega with a moonsault. Dana Brooke, with Reggie, is in at #9 but she does say she’ll go in on her own. Tamina saves Zelina for some reason so Brooke gives Belair a handspring elbow in the corner.

Michelle McCool is in at #10, giving us Tamina, Aliyah, Morgan, Zelina, Belair, Brooke and McCool. House is cleaned and McCool knocks Brooke….right into Reggie’s arms. The Faithbreaker hits Vega and Brooke gets tossed for good this time. Sonya Deville is in at #11 and goes over to join commentary rather than getting inside. The slow elimination attempts continue until Natalya is in at #12.

Morgan goes right at Natalya, who puts her on the apron without much trouble. It’s not quite enough for an elimination so Natalya dumps Tamina instead. More teased eliminations continue until Cameron is in at #13. Cameron cleans some of the house as Deville gets up and slides in, where she takes out Cameron without much trouble. Natalya and Deville are the only ones left standing until Naomi, who hates Deville, is in at #14.

A springboard spinning kick to the face rocks Deville and Naomi kicks her out. Carmella is in at #15 and Corey Graves certainly approves. Carmella walks around the ring as a good chunk of the other women bunched up on one side of the ring for some reason. Rhea Ripley is in at #16 and throws Carmella inside, only to get triple teamed down. Ripley shrugs that off and knocks out Carmella and Vega without much trouble.

Charlotte is in at #17 as a bunch of people go after Natalya. Aliyah is tossed out after about 23 minutes, followed by Naomi being kicked to the floor. She hangs on by her feet….but Sonya Deville is still here to pull Naomi out for the elimination anyway. Ivory, as part of the Right To Censor, is in at #18 and says nothing has changed since she was last here. It is hard for her to look at these girls and, as she gets in the ring, she says she sees a lot of wayward, lost little girls. As she is talking, Ripley picks her up and, as she is still talking, Ripley tosses her out. Ivory: “HOW DARE YOU???”

With that rather funny bit out of the way, Brie Bella is in at #19 and starts the YES chant but can’t get rid of Natalya. Ripley and Belair can’t get rid of Charlotte as Mickie James, reigning Impact Wrestling Knockouts (or Women’s, as the graphic says) Champion is in at #20. That gives us Morgan, Belair, McCool, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Brie Bella and James, the latter of whom goes right after McCool. A headscissors gets rid of McCool and it’s Alicia Fox (with the brown hair instead of the blonde hair) in at #21.

Fox gets to clean some house and the referee checks on Natalya. Nikki Ash is in at #22 and we pause for her to sneak up on Ripley but, of course, she can’t eliminate her. Everyone pairs off until WWE Legend Summer Rae (AND HER SONG THAT IS SO FREAKING CATCHY) is in at #23. A slap off with Natalya goes to Rae, but Charlotte runs her over before anything can get interesting. Natalya dumps Rae and it’s Nikki Bella in at #24. House is cleaned again and the Bellas get to reunite, with Nikki knocking out Fox. Sarah Logan returns at #25, gets in a few shots, and is tossed by the Bellas.

They toss Liv as well, after a pretty ridiculous 37 minutes without an elimination. Liv and Logan get their reunion on the floor as Lita is in at #26. Mickie goes after Lita and gets DDTed, allowing Lita to get the easy elimination. Charlotte and Lita slug it out until Mighty Molly is in at #27…and gets jumped by Ash on the floor. Molly is tossed in and then eliminated by Ash, who gets in a rather long pose and stare. Ronda Rousey makes her big return at #28 and yeah this feels like a huge deal, especially with almost everyone in the ring stopping to look at her.

Ash is out fast and Nikki Bella is sent to the apron…where Brie punches her out. Shotzi is in at #29 as Rousey gets rid of Brie. Rousey goes after Belair and Natalya powerbombs Charlotte as Shayna Baszler completes the field at #30. That gives us a final grouping of Belair, Natalya, Ripley, Charlotte, Lita, Rousey, Shotzi and Baszler. Rousey and Baszler start wrecking people before squaring off instead. Charlotte interrupts that as well so Rousey kicks out Shotzi.

Belair gets rid of Natalya but Natalya comes back in, only to be tossed by Rousey as well. Lita cleans house, including a middle rope hurricanrana on Ripley. The Litasault is loaded up but Ripley breaks it up and, say it with me, Charlotte gets rid of Lita. Ripley and Rousey fight to the apron and Charlotte kicks Ripley out. Belair kicks Charlotte on the apron and spinebusters Baszler but Baszler catches her in the Kirifuda Clutch. That’s reversed into a KOD attempt but Charlotte dumps both of them. We’re down to Rousey vs. Charlotte and they square off, until Charlotte missed a boot in the corner and gets dumped at 59:45.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly great and showed just how little depth there was to the women’s division at this point. Of the thirty women involved, HALF of them were legends or returning names. I know why there is a Women’s Royal Rumble, but if you need to import half of the lineup, it might be time to put it on the shelf. With six of the entrants not even making it a minute each, this was a bunch of nothing until Rousey came in and won, because part timers and returning stars rule.

Titus O’Neil and company did their local charity stuff.

Raw Women’s Title: Doudrop vs. Becky Lynch

Doudrop is challenging and attacked Lynch leading up to the title match. After the Big Match Intros, Doudrop goes with the power to send Becky outside for a breather. Back in and Becky has to bail from a Vader Bomb, leaving Doudrop to get Cannonball the steps by mistake. Becky kicks away but what looks to be a tornado DDT is blocked. The sleeper puts Doudrop down to one knee but she powers out without much effort. Doudrop’s charge goes into the post and Becky hits the missile dropkick for two.

Becky gets run over again though and a backsplash connects for two. The triangle choke has Becky in some trouble but the sitout powerbomb breaks that up fast. The Cannonball gets two but Becky is back up with a Molly Go Round for two of her own. Doudrop’s throat is snapped across the top and a top rope Fameasser gets two more. Back up and Doudrop plants her for two more, only to have another Vader Bomb countered into a super Manhandle Slam to retain the title at 12:55.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much bad as much as it was a lot of standing around waiting on the finish. Doudrop wasn’t about to dethrone the biggest women’s star ever, even if this is a downgraded Becky. This was Becky being given a mountain to climb and I can absolutely give them points for running a fresh challenger out there. That’s a good thing, but you need to have an entertaining match to back it up and that wasn’t the case here. When the most exciting thing in a match is the Wrestlemania sign catching on fire, you’re in big trouble.

The announced attendance is 44,390.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley. They’re very similar, they’re monsters, they were amateur wrestlers, the were mixed martial artists, now they’re having a title match.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley

Lesnar is defending and has Paul Heyman with him while Lashley has MVP. They fight over a lockup to start until Lesnar snaps off a German suplex. Lashley is right back with one of his own but Lesnar hits two in a row. The F5 is countered though and Lashley hits a pair of spears to send Lesnar outside. Another spear sends Lashley through the barricade in the required big crash and Lesnar is rather smiley.

Lashley is back up to post Lesnar and they head back inside. Back in and Lesnar grabs more German suplexes but Lashley slaps on a quick Hurt Lock. Lesnar rams him into the corner for the break and the F5 hits Lashley, only to bump the referee at the same time. Cue Roman Reigns to spear Lesnar down before telling Heyman to hand over the title. Heyman does just that and a belt shot knocks Lesnar silly. Lashley gets the cover and the title at 10:14.

Rating: C+. That’s by far the match of the night so far as it felt like something actually happened. Lesnar vs. Lashley is a genuine dream match and something different for Lesnar, though he wrestled it similar to how he wrestles everything else. The Heyman twist was a good way to go and it’s nice to see Lashley get his title back, but this could have been something special and instead it was just ok. Granted Lashley injured his shoulder during the match so take it with a grain of salt.

Heyman leaves with Reigns as Lashley celebrates.

We recap Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Maryse/Miz. Edge came back, Miz didn’t like it, the wives got involved, mixed tag.

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

Miz is knocked outside to start and Maryse is sent on top of him, allowing Edge to forearm Miz back inside. A cheap shot lets Miz take over on Edge and cannonball down onto his back. Maryse chokes a bit from the floor so Beth goes a stalking, for some reason thinking she needs a chair. Edge manages a quick implant DDT and Maryse can’t cut off the tag.

Beth comes in to beat up Maryse, including a spinning side slam for two. Miz goes after Beth and gets hammered down in the corner for his efforts. Maryse gets in a cheap shot with the loaded purse for two, setting up a camel clutch of all things. That’s broken up and Beth hits a clothesline for the double knockdown.

It’s back to Edge for the Edge-O-Matic on Miz, with Beth adding a powerbomb. Edge’s top rope elbow gets two but he spears the corner for the mishap. Maryse snaps off a top rope hurricanrana (that’s a new one for her) and there’s the French Kiss for Beth. The Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Edge and Miz gives us a shocked face. Beth is back up though and a double spear cuts Miz down. Mostly stereo Glam Slams give Edge the pin at 12:28.

Rating: C. Here is another match where it could have used some chicanery with Miz and Maryse cheating as much as they could have to win the thing and instead they played it pretty straight. The idea of battling couples works, but Edge and Beth aren’t going to lose to Miz and Maryse without all kinds of cheating and everyone knew it. Not an awful match, but another boring one on a show full of them.

A recipient of the Congressional Medal of Honor is here so we hear his story.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with AJ Styles in at #1 (and strikes a Shawn Michaels pose for some reason) and Shinsuke Nakamura (Intercontinental Champion) in at #2, meaning Pat McAfee gets to dance on the announcers’ table. A strike off goes to Nakamura, who hits the spinwheel kick to the head but can’t exploder Styles out. Styles knocks him into the corner and it’s Austin Theory in at #3. The rolling dropkick hits Styles to start but Nakamura goes for Theory.

Robert Roode is in at #4 and hits some spinebusters but Styles cuts him off. Styles reverses a whip and sends Roode outside for the quick elimination. Ridge Holland, with face guard, is in at #5 to run some people over. Styles gets rid of Nakamura and goes after Theory as Montez Ford is in at #6. Ford throws Theory to the apron but can’t get rid of him. Instead Ford kicks away at Holland to little effect and US Champion Damien Priest is in at #7.

A bunch of stomping ensues until Sami Zayn is in at #8. More nothing ensues and it’s Johnny Knoxville in at #9. Knoxville takes Sami down and hammers away before going after Styles. The Phenomenal Blitz drops Knoxville fast and Ford adds the frog splash. Sami Helluva Kicks Knoxville out but Styles dumps Zayn for a bonus. Angelo Dawkins is in at #10, giving us Styles, Theory, Holland, Ford, Priest, and Dawkins. Omos is in at #11 and he should get to clear some of the ring. There goes Dawkins and Ford follows him rather quickly.

Ricochet is in at #12 and get chopped by Omos as NOTHING continues to happen. Chad Gable is in at #13 and rallies the troops to go after Omos, which means sending Priest after him alone. With Priest gone, the rest of the group, plus Dominik Mysterio in at #14, gets rid of Omos. Happy Corbin is in at #15 and dumps Ricochet pretty fast. Dolph Ziggler is in at #16 as this is reaching some incredible levels of boring. Deep Six plants Dominik and Corbin gets rid of him, followed by Styles getting rid of Theory.

Sheamus is in at #17, with Holland being tossed before Sheamus can get inside. Rick Boogs is in at #18 and McAfee is excited, as compared to the eerily still crowd. Boogs tosses Gable and Madcap Moss is in at #19. Corbin tosses Styles, ending a nearly thirty minute run with….nothing (that’s the story of the match so far: nothing happens, and we’re just sitting around waiting as more people come in and go out).

It’s Riddle in at #20, giving us Corbin, Ziggler, Sheamus, Boogs, Moss and Riddle as this drones on. Corbin and Moss get rid of Boogs and Drew McIntyre returns from injury at #21. McIntyre wastes no time in getting rid of Moss and Corbin, which would somehow carry on through Wrestlemania. That’s not enough though as Drew follows them outside and unloads on them with steps to the head. Kevin Owens is in at #22 and Pop Up Powerbombs McIntyre.

Rey Mysterio is in at #23 and the fans are barely reacting to a string of big, popular names. Kofi Kingston is in at #24 and gets tossed to the apron fast. Owens breaks up a springboard attempt and Kofi lands on the barricade….but his feet hit the floor as Kofi finally botches his big save spot. It’s Otis in at #25 and hits some elbows as the mindless brawling continues.

Big E. is in at #26 and oh yeah, he’s a former WWE Champion. Belly to belly suplexes abound and the Warrior Splash hits Owens. Bad Bunny gets lucky #27 and gets to clean house, including a high crossbody, followed by a Canadian Destroyer to Riddle. Bunny ducks the Brogue Kick and ducks Sheamus before teaming up with Rey to get rid of Ziggler. Mysterio turns his back on Bunny and almost gets tossed, leaving Owens to Stun Bunny instead. Otis dumps Mysterio and Shane McMahon is in at #28.

Shane wastes no time in getting rid of Owens before slugging it out with McIntyre. Randy Orton, the hometown boy, is in at #29 and the RKO gets rid of Big E. Another RKO hits Otis and Riddle hits a running RKO to McIntyre. Otis is out….and Brock Lesnar is in at #30, meaning everyone knows exactly where this is going. Lesnar gets to clean house, including a bunch of suplexes before dumping Orton and Bunny. Riddle is tossed, Shane follows him, and it’s down to Lesnar vs. McIntyre. Some right hands look to set up the Claymore but Lesnar reversed into the F5 to win at 51:11.

Rating: D-. This was HORRIBLE and is absolutely in the running for worst Royal Rumble of all time. There was no drama until the end, but the bigger problem is there was nothing set up throughout the match. This is the third time I’ve seen this match and I still have no idea what is supposed to be interesting until the end. People come in, they brawl, they get eliminated, more people come in. It’s about 50 minutes of absolute nothing and then “oh well, here’s Brock to get ANOTHER Wrestlemania title match after two minutes of work”. This felt like they didn’t try and just said “Lesnar wins, move on”. Absolutely horrendous.

Overall Rating: D-. I’ve heard this show called the lowest of the low for WWE creative in this era and that very well may be true. The ONLY decent thing on the entire show was Rollins vs. Reigns, and that ended in a screwy finish. You also have Lesnar vs. Lashley and that doesn’t even require creative to work. Instead, we had two terrible Rumbles, one of which is an all time miss, plus some nothing midcard matches. The Rumbles are always going to define these shows though and these were all time terrible. Horrific show and it gets worse every time I watch it.

 

Ratings Comparison

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B-
Redo: B

Women’s Royal Rumble:

Original: C-
Redo: D+.

Becky Lynch vs. Doudrop

Original: D+
Redo: C-

Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Edge/Beth Phoenix vs. Miz/Maryse

Original: C
Redo: C

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: C+
Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C-
Redo: D-

WOW I have no idea what I was thinking on that Men’s Royal Rumble. That has to be up there on my all time list of stupid ratings.

 

Here is the original review if you need a recap.

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2022/01/30/royal-rumble-2022-at-least-something-caught-fire/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – July 11, 2008: The Not So Wedding Show

Smackdown
Date: July 11, 2008
Location: River Center, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these and I’m barely remembering what we’re dealing with at the moment. HHH is ready to defend the Smackdown World Title against Edge at the Great American Bash, though Edge and Vickie Guerrero are having some troubles, to the point where their wedding is off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge’s recent issues, from losing the World Title to CM Punk to his problems with Vickie Guerrero. Edge thinking that yelling at his boss/fiance was a good idea wasn’t his greatest moment.

Here is- Edge to get things going. He has had a week to think about what he said to Vickie Guerrero last week….and the wedding is STILL off. He’s happier without Vickie because he’s better than her. At the Great American Bash, he can prove everyone wrong by winning the World Title again.

He has won more titles than anyone else in this industry and he will prove how great he is again at the Great American Bash when he beats HHH. Cue Vickie Guerrero (Vickie: “Excuse me, baby.”) to say the wedding being canceled isn’t her loss. Vickie gives him a match tonight: a No DQ match against the Big Show. Edge says he isn’t afraid and promises to make Show a loser like her. Vickie has his mic cut off.

Video on Maria.

Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Matt takes him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Back up and Matt grabs a headlock for some careful grinding. Benjamin sends him into the corner and hits a neckbreaker for two. The neck crank goes on as Benjamin certainly has a target so far. That’s broken up and Benjamin misses the Stinger Splash, allowing Hardy to start the comeback.

It’s too early for the Twist of Fate so Hardy settles for a corner clothesline/bulldog. The top rope elbow to the back of the head gives Matt two but Benjamin is right back with the exploder for the same. Matt is back up to try the Twist of Fate but Benjamin grabs the rope and hits…well it was supposed to be Paydirt but Matt fell the wrong way, making it kind of a jumping clothesline. Either way, it gives Benjamin the upset pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a surprise and it was even a clean pin, which doesn’t make for the best future for Matt and the title. For now though, Benjamin getting a push isn’t a bad thing, but he couldn’t have put his feet on the ropes here? Nice job on the surprise pin, though I’m not wild on the way they got there.

The Edgeheads are in Vickie Guerrero’s office and say the three of them don’t deserve Edge’s abuse. Instead, they want to face Jesse and Festus, with Vickie making the match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Domino

MVP is on commentary and gets a few jabs from Kennedy during the pre-match chat. Kennedy takes him down to start and hits a corner clothesline, with Domino bailing out to the floor. Back in and Domino manages a quick slam and legdrop but Kennedy fights up again. Some elbows to the face and a running boot in the corner have Domino in trouble, setting up the Mic Check to give Kennedy the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this short here and that is how it should have gone as the point was for MVP and Kennedy to be in the same place, likely with something happening after the match. Both of them could use this feud as they could both go or a boost. Domino does not seem long for this place, as he could not have been more of a jobber here.

Post match Umaga runs in and wrecks Kennedy.

Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, gives Edge a pep talk and says he’s going to give Vickie Guerrero a piece of his mind.

Post break Chavo offers Vickie that piece of his mind….which is about how horrible Edge is and how the Guerreros have to stick together. Vickie doesn’t buy it (my goodness intelligence!) and gives Chavo a match with HHH instead.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Non-title. Finlay and Morrison start things off as JR goes on a mini rant about Edge and Vickie’s drama. Miz’s cheap shot earns him a flip over the top so Finlay beats up both of them at once. Hornswoggle comes in for some Stunners (JR: “Next thing you know he’ll be drinking beer!”) but a double dropkick cuts him off. An enziguri hits a kneeling Morrison though and it’s Finlay coming in to clean house. The Celtic Cross connects but Miz makes the save. That earns him a shillelagh shot, followed by the Tadpole Splash to give Hornswoggle the pin.

Rating: C. Nothing is getting a ton of time this week and that doesn’t exactly make me interested in seeing the longer form rematch. This probably sets up a pay per view title match and at least there was some cheating to get us to the rematch. It’s still a bad night for the champs though and that isn’t the best thing to see.

Video on Jeff Hardy’s Mission: Impossible themed photo shoot as he chases the World Title.

HHH vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. HHH fights out of a headlock to start and elbows him in the face, which does not sit well with Chavo early on. Chavo’s arm wringing gets him punched in the face and HHH starts in on the arm. Chavo comes back with some right hands and Neely’s cheap shot sets up a crossface chickenwing of all things. That’s broken up so HHH hits the running knee. The spinebuster cuts Chavo off again and, after decking Neely, HHH grabs the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion won for once, even if it was in another short match. Then again, it’s nice to have a showcase for the World Champion for a change as you don’t get to see that often enough. Chavo getting punished for trying to play Vickie and Edge at the same time was nice too and the match went well, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Natalya/Maryse

Michelle takes Maryse down to start as Foley explains how to pronounce Maryse. A dropkick gives Michelle two and it’s off to Cherry for a Hennig necksnap. Maryse runs over to bring in Natalya, who easily slams Cherry. Natalya gets in a kick to the leg and grabs the Sharpshooter for the fast pin. Did they suddenly get a go home cue or something?

Post match Natalya beats up Michelle and suplexes her on the floor.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Jesse slugs away at Hawkins to start and stomps him down in the corner. Ryder comes in but so does Festus with the latter getting to clean house. Festus clears the ring and Hawkins and Ryder just take the countout.

Post match the bell has turned Festus into a zombie again so Hawkins and Ryder beat down Jesse. They were being scientific….until Jesse rings the bell so Festus can wreck the villains.

Video on HHH.

Stevie Richards vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Kozlov has gained entrance music and runs him over with a shoulder to start. Some knees to the ribs and a fireman’s carry put Richards down and we hit the bodyscissors. Back up and Richards hammers away, only to get headbutted down for the pin.

Edge yells at Chavo Guerrero until the Edgeheads come in. The argument keeps going until Vickie Guerrero comes in. If anyone else tries to help Edge, or if Edge walks out on the match, they’re fired.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Edge vs. Big Show

No DQ and Vickie Guerrero is watching from the stage. Show starts fast and takes him to the floor for a ram into the barricade. The announcers’ table takes too long to load up though and Edge gets in a quick spear as we take an early break. Back with Show cutting off a kendo stick shot and throwing Edge into the steps and over the barricade without much effort. Edge comes back with a bulldog off of said barricade and they both get a breather.

A kendo stick to Show’s head lets them go back inside, where Edge’s choke manages to take Show down again. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex but the chokeslam is countered into a DDT. Edge brings in a chair but charges a bit too hard, allowing Show to punch it into his face. For some reason that doesn’t know Edge silly and he’s back with a low blow. The Conchairto is loaded up but Show is up with a chokeslam. Show loads up his own Conchairto, only to have Vickie say stop the match. The bell rings and Vickie comes in to check on Edge.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show street fight and that is probably something they have done more than once. The ending was more important though and that is going to lead to the next step in the rather long Edge/Vickie saga. Putting someone against Big Show is a pretty standard punishment, so everything here made sense, even if it wasn’t an instant classic.

Edge and Vickie reconcile to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The ending is the big story here as there wasn’t much else on the rest of the show. They did well enough with Edge and Vickie, but that’s about all there is on here, with even HHH not feeling that important. HHH vs. Edge/Vickie is a big time feud and having it take place at a mid level pay per view like the Great American Bash is certainly a weird choice. Smackdown needs another good story though as there just isn’t much going on around here.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2008 (2022 Redo): SURPRISE!

Royal Rumble 2008
Date: January 27, 2008
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City New York
Attendance: 20,798
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

I believe this is my fifth time reviewing this show but I’m always curious to see how much different it feels having recently watched the TV leading up to it. The show has been set for a long time now and that means we need to get on with the pay per view already. Of course there is the Royal Rumble, but the Raw World Title match between Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton is the real draw here. This show is summed up in three words: Hardy Could Win. It worked in 2008 and it’s working again here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Royal Rumble, with this year’s being extra special because it’s in Madison Square Garden. Works for me.

Ric Flair vs. MVP

Flair’s career is on the line but MVP’s US Title isn’t. Before the match, Flair talks about how he has wrestled here throughout his career, starting all the way back in 1976. Flair thanks the fans for the respect they have given him throughout the years….and then MVP’s music cuts him off. Feeling out process to start with Flair being driven back into the corner, meaning he needs to stop and think for a second.

A hammerlock sends MVP into the ropes so Flair chops him down. Back up and MVP kicks Flair in the head to take over, setting up a neckbreaker for two. Something like a crossface chickenwing keeps Flair down but MVP is no Bob Backlund, meaning Flair is right back up. Flair goes for the knee but gets knocked into the corner, allowing MVP to strike him down. The running boot in the corner gives MVP three, albeit with Flair’s foot on the ropes.

The distraction lets Flair roll him up for two so MVP grabs a butterfly suplex for two of his own. A superplex gets two more and the frustration is really setting in. Back up and they collide for a double knockdown, making me wonder if a draw would end Flair’s career. Flair rolls him up a few times for two each before chopping away. That earns Flair a facebuster but the Playmaker is countered into a Figure Four to give Flair the win.

Rating: C. This wasn’t so much about the drama, as Flair wasn’t going to lose to MVP, even at a show like the Rumble. Instead, this was all about Flair getting in Madison Square Garden one more time and the match was built up over a few weeks. I’m not wild on the US Champion giving up clean, but there are bigger things afoot here.

Vince McMahon gives Hornswoggle a pep talk for the Royal Rumble, Finlay comes in and Vince suggests that Hornswoggle might turn on him.

And now, we meet Mike Adamle, who talks about Ric Flair’s match and throws it to a package on Chris Jericho vs. JBL.

We recap Jericho vs. JBL, which is focused on JBL not liking Jericho’s comeback and costing him the WWE Title. Then JBL took him out, setting up this showdown.

Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Jericho drives him into the corner to start so JBL begs off a bit. That doesn’t work for Jericho, who takes him down and hammers away again. A missed clothesline lets Jericho grab the Walls, which sends JBL bailing to the rope. Jericho knocks him outside for a baseball slide and then sends him into the steps for a bonus. Back in and JBL drops the bad throat across the top to take over.

As you might guess, JBL starts hammering Jericho down in the corner, albeit not as fast as he did in the past. The logical sleeper goes on for a bit, until Jericho fights up and hits his own hard clothesline. Back up and JBL sends him HARD into the post, with Jericho coming up busted open. Jericho pops back to his feet and sends JBL outside despite being COVERED in blood. One heck of a chair shot to the head knocks JBL silly but also hands Jericho the DQ.

Rating: C+. It was a bit of a slow match but they did a great job of setting up the violent ending. They were trying to keep the feud going here and Jericho being that busted open was a good way to accomplish just that. It was a violent fight and Jericho’s chair shot made it even better. Not too bad here, albeit with the usual Jericho pacing issues.

Post match Jericho unloads on JBL and chokes him with the camera cable as JBL did to him a few weeks ago.

Ashley Massaro tries to talk to Maria but Santino Marella cuts her off, saying Maria isn’t interested in Playboy. Right.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Edge won the title thanks to some assistance from Vickie Guerrero, his new girlfriend. Rey won a Beat The Clock Challenge by pinning Edge to earn the shot here, with the Rey/Guerrero family details making things even more complicated.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge, with Vickie Guerrero and the Edgeheads, is defending. They take their time to start with Edge grabbing a wristlock. Rey kicks his way out as the fans are WAY behind Edge, with Cole writing it off as a New York thing. Edge sends him to the apron and hits a baseball slide to the floor, where the Edgeheads get THIS CLOSE to interfering. That’s enough for an ejection, allowing Rey to come back with a springboard seated senton for two.

Rey tries to pick up the pace even further but gets knocked off the top for a crash. The half crab goes on to keep Rey in trouble before Edge shifts it to something like an ankle lock. Rey’s leg is good enough to come back with an enziguri but the 619 is cut off. Back up and Rey manages to hit the sitout bulldog, setting up a kick to the head with the good leg for two.

Edge is staggered enough that Rey can knock him to the floor, setting up a sliding tornado DDT. Back in and Edge boots him down but Rey hits a quick 619. The top rope splash connects but Vickie gets out of the wheelchair to break up the pin. Rey doesn’t get distracted and sets up another 619, which only hits the interfering Vickie. That’s enough of a shock for Edge to spear Rey out of the air to retain.

Rating: B-. Another good one here, even if there was no chance of a title change here. Rey was little more than the designated victim for Edge as tends to be the case for the Royal Rumble. They had a pay per view worthy match though and Edge gets to move on to someone bigger with Wrestlemania on the way. Nice stuff here, given the circumstances.

Everyone checks on Vickie, who has to be put back in the wheelchair.

Mr. Kennedy comes in to see Ric Flair (in a towel) and condescendingly praise him for his win. Kennedy promises to win the Rumble and suggests he could retire Flair before Wrestlemania. Shawn Michaels comes in to suggest that Kennedy leave and then accidentally compares Flair to Kennedy. Flair knows Shawn is winning the Rumble tonight….and here’s Batista for an awkward staredown. And HHH too, just to make it weirder. HHH tells Ric to put his pants on and Shawn plugs his new shirt.

Here is Maria for the Kiss Cam. With that out of the way, Ashley Massaro comes out to offer Maria the Playboy spot but here is Santino Marella to say no for her. Oh and New York sports teams are awful. Maria thinks posing is a good idea so Santino has a present for her: Big Dick Johnson in New England Patriots (playing the New York Giants in the Super Bowl) gear. The women beat Johnson up to finish this one big announcement off.

Mike Adamle throws us to a package on Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy.

We recap Jeff Hardy challenging Randy Orton for the WWE Title. Hardy is on the roll of a lifetime and is ready to challenge for the title. This was one of the best builds WWE has done in a LONG time as it feels like Hardy could actually pull off the huge upset. This gets the big music video treatment and it still works very well.

Raw World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending and Hardy’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. They fight over a lockup to start until Jeff shoves him away to a rather strong reaction. Hardy grabs a headlock on the mat, which is reversed with a headscissors. That doesn’t bother Hardy, who is right back with the legdrop between the legs for two. Orton gets clotheslined to the floor and there’s the dropkick through the ropes to send him hard into the barricade.

They fight on the floor for a bit with Orton grabbing a belly to back suplex for two back inside. The circle stomp keeps Hardy in trouble and the choking has JR and King getting rather annoyed. Hardy fights up again and sends Orton over the top for a change, setting up the big dive off the apron. Back in and Jeff gets sent shoulder first into the post to put him right back down, meaning Orton can grab the chinlock.

Hardy fights up after a good while and hits the Whisper In The Wind for a rather near fall. The Swanton is loaded up but Orton rolls outside before it can launch. That’s fine with Hardy, who dropkicks Orton off the apron and hits a moonsault off the top to make it even worse. Back in and the Twist of Fate is loaded up but Orton counters into the RKO to retain the title.

Rating: B-. It didn’t have the hue moment of Hardy winning the title but it wound up being a pretty solid match with Hardy coming up just short. The problem is that they didn’t have any major spot from Hardy but you could tell that he would be back. Hardy will have to get there somewhere, though he had to come up short here, despite an amazing buildup.

Rumble By The Numbers time!

569 wrestlers eliminated
36 wrestlers eliminated by Steve Austin
11 appearances by Shawn Michaels
11 wrestlers eliminated by Kane in 2001
3 Mick Foley personae to appear in the same Royal Rumble
2 feet that have to touch the ground
1 woman to enter the match, with Chyna
62:12 that Rey Mysterio lasted in 2006
2 seconds that Warlord lasted in 1990
3 Steve Austin wins
2 wins for the #1 spot, compared to 1 win for #30
#27 produces the most winners
73% of winners have gone on to win the title at Wrestlemania since 1993

Michael Buffer handles the Royal Rumble intro in a nice bonus.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals. Undertaker is in at #1 and Shawn Michaels is in at #2 so they’re starting very fast here. Undertaker wastes no time in slugging away and even knocks Shawn onto the top. A running big boot only hits corner though and Undertaker winds up on the apron. That’s fine for him as he catches a charging Shawn by the throat and drops him with a big boot. Santino Marella is in at #3 and lasts as long as you would expect. With Santino gone, Shawn tries to toss Undertaker but gets punched in the face again. Old School is broken up without much trouble and Great Khali is in at #4.

The fans start up the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants as Undertaker strikes away at Khali and actually choke shoves him out. Hardcore Holly is in at #5 and actually hangs on for a bit by slugging it out with Undertaker. That earns him a big boot to the face but Shawn goes to eliminate Undertaker, allowing Holly to fire off some chops in the corner. John Morrison is in at #6 and it’s time for people to start pairing off. With nothing going on, Tommy Dreamer is in at #7 because we needed some ECW chants.

Dreamer does about what you would expect from him until Batista is in at #8 to keep the star power up. Dreamer breaks up the Undertaker vs. Batista showdown and is promptly eliminated (serves him right). Batista spears Morrison down as commentary thinks teaming up on Undertaker/Batista/Shawn makes sense. Hornswoggle is in at #9 and goes straight underneath the ring in a smart move. Batista hits another spear on Undertaker and Holly backdrops Shawn.

Chuck Palumbo is in at #10, giving us Undertaker, Shawn, Holly, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (under the ring) and Palumbo. Morrison saves himself from elimination as the six in the ring pair off a bit. The banged up Jamie Noble is in at #11 and lasts all of thirty seconds before getting tossed by Palumbo. CM Punk is in at #12 and gets his face blasted off by Shawn’s clothesline. Cody Rhodes is in at #13 and manages to dropkick Undertaker down as Punk knocks Palumbo out. Umaga is in at #14 and Spikes Holly out to keep the numbers even.

Snitsky is in at #15 and stomps on Cody in the corner until Miz is in at #16. Undertaker goes after Umaga (weird pairing) but can’t get him out. Shelton Benjamin is in at #17 and snaps Miz and Morrison’s throats on the top. Paydirt hits Punk but Shawn superkicks Shelton out in less than twenty seconds. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 for the big nostalgia pop in the Garden. Punk goes straight for him because he wants to get knocked down by Snuka.

Speaking of Snuka, he got a big pop at #18, but Roddy Piper is in at #19 for a bigger one. Everything stops cold for the Piper vs. Snuka showdown and yeah ok this is awesome. Kane is in at #20 and tosses Piper and Snuka without much trouble. That leaves us with Undertaker, Michaels, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (still underneath the ring), Punk, Rhodes, Umaga, Snitsky, Miz and Kane. Umaga breaks up a chokeslam to Shawn and it’s Carlito in at #21.

Punk and Morrison almost toss Carlito out but he springboards back and catches Punk with a Backstabber. Mick Foley is in at #22 to start cleaning house but Umaga runs a lot of people over as well. Mr. Kennedy is in at #23 and hits some Mic Checks before kicking down a sitting up Undertaker. That’s not cool with Undertaker who gives him a chokeslam and gets his own chance to clean house.

Big Daddy V is in at #24 and Undertaker knocks Snitsky out, only to get superkicked out by Shawn. Kennedy tosses Shawn immediately thereafter and the ring is suddenly a lot more empty. Shawn lands at Undertaker’s feet but Undertaker beats up Snitsky to let off steam instead. Kennedy and Rhodes fight to the apron but it’s Mark Henry in at #25. Henry and V start getting all dominant as Hornswoggle pops out to pull Miz to the floor for an elimination.

Chavo Guerrero is in at #26 and Punk is right on him as Kane boots Morrison out. Hornswoggle pops out again and gets grabbed by Henry and V. Cue Finlay with the shillelagh (I guess in at #27) for the save and he leaves with Hornswoggle, which apparently counts as a double elimination. Elijah Burke is in at #28 as JR says Finlay was officially disqualified for the shillelagh. Batista is knocked outside (not eliminated) and Chavo dumps out Punk to keep their feud going.

HHH is in at #29 and this should clear some people out. There goes Rhodes and V follows him, setting up the HHH vs. Foley slugout. HHH sends Foley into Burke for the double elimination and Umaga misses a charge into the post. There’s the Pedigree to Umaga…..and none of that matters as JOHN CENA returns at #30 to an all time shocked reaction.

It wasn’t clear if Cena was going to be back by Wrestlemania but since Cena doesn’t seem to be a human, he’s already back after two months instead of about six. That gives us a final grouping of Batista, Umaga, Kane, Carlito, Kennedy, Henry, Guerrero, HHH and Cena. After being shocked, the fans remember to boo Cena as he fires out Carlito, Henry and Chavo.

We get the big Cena vs. HHH showdown with HHH hitting the spinebuster but getting dropped by Umaga. Batista spears Umaga down and tosses Kennedy, followed by a running clothesline to get rid of Umaga. We’re down to Kane, Batista, HHH and Cena, with HHH and Batista quickly tossing Kane. They stare at each other for a long time before the fight is on. Batista clotheslines them both down and spinebusters HHH but Cena backdrops his way out of a Batista Bomb.

That’s enough for the elimination and we’re down to HHH vs. Cena. That means some sign pointing before the BOO/YAY slugout begins. Cena hits the ProtoBomb and the Shuffle but the AA is blocked. The double clothesline leaves them both down for a needed breather for both them and the fans. Back up and another AA attempt is countered and HHH hits a DDT to take over. HHH can’t throw him out and can’t Pedigree him either, as Cena reverses into an AA for the win.

Rating: B. This match had a lot of the things that a great Rumble needs, ranging from surprises (especially the big one at the end) to star power throughout to a few fun moments like Foley, Piper and Snuka. The Cena return is what people remember about this match though and that is all it needed to be, as that was a genuine shock for a great moment. Quite good Rumble, with the Cena part being the big icing on the cake.

Cena celebrates a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is the biggest one match show of the year and as it goes, so goes the rest of the show. The other four matches on here were good enough but there was nothing worth going out of your way to see. Cena being back breathes a lot of life into the show but it was still a good one even coming to that point. Not an all time classic, but there are far worse ways to spend two hours and forth five minutes.

 

 

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2021 (2022 Redo): Thank Goodness It’s Over

Survivor Series 2021
Date: November 21, 2021
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,120
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Pat McAfee

Since it’s Survivor Series and there are no other possible options for the show in the history of ever, it’s time for a Battle Of Brand Supremacy with wrestlers who have been on the roster for about a month. That means a battle of World Champions Roman Reigns and Big E., plus Survivor Series tag matches and….a Rock 25th Anniversary battle royal? Let’s get to it.

For the sake of simplicity, all matches involving champions are non-title.

Kickoff Show: Damian Priest (Raw) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura (Smackdown)

US Champion vs. Intercontinental Champion and Rick Boogs handles Nakamura’s entrance, much to Pat McAfee’s (now dancing on the announcers’ table) delight. Priest works on the arm to start but a Boogs guitar solo cuts that off, allowing Nakamura to grab a headlock. Nakamura takes him into the corner for Good Vibrations, with Boogs playing something that is in no way Good Vibrations.

Back up and Priest knocks him down and grabs a chinlock, meaning Boogs plays some more for a distraction. Some strikes to the head rock Priest and the sliding German suplex makes it worse (with McAfee jumping up to celebrate). Priest fights up and hits a running elbow in the corner, followed by a hard clothesline for two.

South Of Heaven is broken up though and Nakamura kicks him in the head again. Kinshasa is countered into South Of Heaven for two but the Reckoning is blocked. Priest counters an armbar into a triangle choke but Boogs guitars Nakamura to freedom AGAIN. Finally Priest goes outside and breaks the guitar (McAfee: “YOU SON OF A B****!”), with one of the pieces nailing Nakamura for the DQ at 9:24.

Rating: C. I was having fun with the back and forth as they had some chemistry together, but at the same time, there is only so much you can get with the constant Boogs interference. I do like that they didn’t have a champion get pinned here and instead went with Priest snapping to finish things up. Not a great match, but a fast paced one to start things off.

Smackdown – 1
Raw – 0

The opening video talks about how this is two sides battling….and we see a clip from Rock’s Netflix movie Red Notice. The voiceover talks about how many things the movie and show have in common before moving into the nonsense about this being the ONE NIGHT where Raw and Smackdown go head to head. Clips from the movie mock teamwork, which is what this show is all about. After more clips and more generic opening video statements about how important the show is, we’re ready to go.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte. They were old friends but then both wanted to be the best, with Lynch getting there in a big way. Then Lynch left on maternity leave and Charlotte bragged about how great she (as in Charlotte) is so now that Lynch is back, it’s time to fight.

Before we got there though, there was also the VERY awkward moment where Charlotte was supposed to hand over the Raw Women’s Title and dropped it instead, leading to ALL KINDS of problems/discussion. Oh and Charlotte’s REALLY annoying “UH-OH” promo. This does at least have a personal story rather than just doing the Raw vs. Smackdown deal.

Charlotte (Smackdown) vs. Becky Lynch (Raw)

For a bonus, they’re both dressed as characters from Wandavision, with Charlotte as the villain and Becky as the hero. Becky hits her in the face to start and the brawl is on early. Charlotte goes for the leg but has to escape a Disarm-Her attempt. Back up and Charlotte hits a spear but Becky hits a heck of a spinning kick to the face. They head outside for a hard posting to Charlotte but it’s too early for the Manhandle Slam.

Charlotte gets her down and rams Becky’s face into the mat over and over. Becky is sent outside so Charlotte loads up the moonsault, which is shoved HARD into the barricade for a great looking crash instead. Charlotte sends her into the barricade and they both get back in at the same time for the big staredown. Becky avoids a shot to the knee in the corner but an armbar is countered into a powerbomb for two.

Some stomps in the corner have Charlotte in trouble and the fans aren’t thrilled with Becky. A fall away slam sends Becky into the corner for a crash, followed by the Andrade double moonsault for two. Charlotte snaps her throat first across the top but Becky knocks her into the ropes. The Fameasser onto the ropes gives Becky two and Charlotte misses the big boot, only to ram her head into Becky’s for two instead. The second big boot gets two instead so Becky is right back with a Christian layout reverse DDT.

Back up and the Manhandle Slam gives Becky two more, setting up a cross between a Figure Four and a heel hook. Charlotte turns it over for the break anyway and they’re both down for a bit. I’m not sure why Becky is down but it does make things a bit more dramatic. Yet another big boot knocks Becky outside and the moonsault…well it comes close to her at least, with the replay not making it any better.

Back in and Charlotte grabs her own Disarm-Her but Becky slips out. They fight into the corner where Charlotte grabs a rollup with ropes for two, as the referee sees the cheating. Becky reverses into a rollup of her own and doesn’t get caught grabbing the ropes for the pin at 18:13.

Rating: B+. These two work well and they treated it as a huge match, especially at the start where they both came out swinging. The ending was more of a way to save Charlotte than to give us a definitive winner, but after Charlotte has gone over so many times, doing a tainted job to the biggest female star ever isn’t asking too much. Great opener, with all kinds of energy and the big fight feel.

Raw – 1
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: Debuting at Survivor Series 1996.

Raw Men vs. Smackdown Men

Raw: Seth Rollins, Finn Balor, Kevin Owens, Austin Theory, Bobby Lashley
Smackdown: Drew McIntyre, Jeff Hardy, King Woods, Happy Corbin, Sheamus

Survivor Series match and MVP/Madcap Moss are the respective sixths. Lashley has his spot after taking it from Dominik Mysterio and also caused Rey Mysterio to lose his spot to Theory. On the other side, Sami Zayn lost to Hardy, costing himself a spot on the team. You know, in case you needed a recap on the five people per show being thrown together. Rollins, the self proclaimed Raw captain, lets Owens start, so Owens bails to the floor and leaves for the countout less than a minute in.

After Owens takes a bow, McIntyre jumps Rollins on the floor as Theory comes in to face Woods. Theory gets his arm cranked on and it’s McIntyre coming in to launch him into the corner. Sheamus and McIntyre take turns chopping at Theory (McAfee is rather giddy) and Corbin gets in on it with a pretty good right hand. Theory manages to punch his way to freedom though and the tag brings in Rollins, who is knocked right back into the Smackdown corner.

It’s Hardy coming in to start on the arm and a quick splash gets one. Rollins is able to grab Sheamus by the arm though and Balor comes in to work on that arm for a change. Again though, that doesn’t last long as Sheamus drags him right back over for the tag to Corbin. We continue to e parade of arm cranking between people who don’t really dislike each other, making this match feel all the less interesting. Deep Six gets two on Balor with Lashley making the save, meaning everything breaks down.

With almost everyone else being knocked down, Balor kicks Corbin in the head and drops the Coup de Grace for the elimination. Hardy comes in to face Balor and the fans are rather pleased. It’s Hardy taking over with the basement dropkick but Balor’s own dropkick gets his own two. Lashley comes in for a running shoulder in the corner to Hardy, which has McAfee worried on commentary.

Hardy fights out of Balor’s chinlock and hits Whisper in the Wind, leaving Lashley and McIntyre to fight on the floor. Lashley posts him (McAfee: “DREW ARE YOU OK???”), leaving Theory to cover Hardy for two as the fans are interested in….something. It’s back to Woods to clean house, including a discus forearm to Theory. Lashley crotches Woods on top though and the Hurt Lock is good for the elimination to make it 4-3 Raw.

Everything breaks down again and Balor’s slingshot dive is pulled out of the air by Sheamus. We get the big Lashley vs. McIntyre showdown with Lashley backing up for some reason. McIntyre jumps him instead but Lashley powers him into the corner. That earns him a clothesline out to the floor with McIntyre following to post Lashley for a change. They fight over the barricade and that’s a double countout to get rid of the big guys.

The fans are NOT happy, even as Lashley jumps McIntyre after the eliminations. A Claymore drops Lashley though and a Glasgow Kiss drops a laughing Rollins before both guys leave. We’re down to Sheamus/Hardy vs. Rollins/Theory/Balor with Sheamus charging into a boot in the corner. That’s enough for Rollins to dive over for the hot tag to Balor, who is quickly powerslammed for two.

Balor is back up with a Sling Blade but the Coup de Grace misses, setting up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin. Theory is right in for a heck of a dropkick and it’s Rollins coming back in for a chinlock. After a pretty good while, Sheamus powers up and brings Hardy in to clean house.

Everything breaks down with Sheamus playing Matt Hardy for a springboard splash to the other two in the corner. That’s enough for Sheamus and Hardy to hit stereo ten forearms to the chest, followed by White Noise to Rollins. Everything breaks down again and Rollins pulls Hardy off the apron, leaving Theory to roll Sheamus up for the elimination. That leaves us with Hardy vs. Rollins/Theory…but Sheamus decks Theory before he leaves….and then does it to Hardy too.

Rollins is fine enough to get the tag and hit a frog splash for two on Hardy as we settle in to the beating. Theory takes Hardy up top but gets knocked down, setting up the Swanton for the pin. Rollins isn’t happy and glares at Hardy, who grabs a rollup for two. A hard forearm to the back of the head gets two on Hardy but the Twist of Fate drops Rollins. The Swanton hits raised knees though and the Stomp gives Rollins the final pin at 29:55.

Rating: B. It was a fun, hard hitting match, but the Raw vs. Smackdown lineups continue to feel so worthless. They might as well do a Lethal Lottery format and you would get the same result. The good thing is that the talent is here and can make a match like this work, but the format desperately needs to change to make it more interesting.

Raw – 2
Smackdown – 1

WWE did some charity stuff in Harlem.

Vince McMahon arrived earlier and got a big reception from a bunch of the wrestlers. Then he pulled out a gold egg, because cross promotion.

Classic Rock Moment: recreating the Montreal Screwjob a year later at Survivor Series 1998.

Roman Reigns comes in to see Vince McMahon, who shows him the egg. That’s Cleopatra’s egg, which was given to him by the Rock. Apparently it’s worth $100 million dollars, which Reigns says is as much as his next contract. And that’s it.

The Rock 25th Anniversary Battle Royal

Shanky, Commander Azeez, T-Bar, Robert Roode, Angel, Humberto, Shelton Benjamin, Sami Zayn, R-Truth, Cedric Alexander, Montez Ford, Jinder Mahal, Dolph Ziggler, Cesaro, Otis, Mansoor, Drew Gulak, Erik, Chad Gable, Ivar, Apollo Crews, Omos, AJ Styles, Ricochet, Angelo Dawkins

The Street Profits come to the ring with a bunch of Pizza Hut. Nothing wrong with a sponsorship. Cole and Graves get pizza but Saxton is denied, as he should be. Styles bails to the floor and stands on the announcers’ table as everyone else fights for the smart move of the night. Gulak and Benjamin are out to start with Humberto following them. Truth heads outside to get some pizza, which he offers to Omos and Otis.

The latter takes it before throwing Truth out and going after Omos. Otis doesn’t last long and Gable armbars Cesaro over the rope. That’s broken up and Cesaro knocks Gable out and T-Bar is dropkicked to the floor by Ricochet. The fans want pizza but have to settle for Alexander and Garza being tossed out. There goes Erik and Ivar at the hands of Shanky, because the potential is in Shanky instead of the Viking Raiders. Omos gets rid of Shanky with ease and Roode catapults Mansoor out.

Roode and Ziggler go after Omos and the giant gets rid of Roode, leaving Styles to Phenomenal Forearm Ziggler for the elimination. Zayn tries to rally the remaining Smackdown names but yells at Ricochet, leaving Ford and Dawkins to toss him out. Omos gets rid of Azeez, who pulls Styles out despite Omos’ protests. Crews is out next and we’re down to Omos, Dawkins, Ford, Cesaro and Ricochet. Cesaro rallies the troops to go after Omos, earning himself an elimination. There go Dawkins and Ford, leaving us with Ricochet vs. Omos. That doesn’t last long either as Omos tosses him out for the win at 10:38.

Rating: C. This was ALL about Omos, who threw out about half of the field and dominated throughout. It worked for Andre and even if Omos isn’t quite there, it was a nice performance. Omos is someone who works well in this kind of a spot, even if this had absolutely NOTHING to do with the Rock.

Raw – 3
Smackdown – 1

Post match Styles goes for the pizza but Ford kicks him in the head and throws it into the crowd.

Classic Rock Moment: winning the 2000 Royal Rumble, even if Big Show really won.

We look at the pre-show match.

RKBro (Raw) vs. Usos (Smackdown)

Riddle starts fast with an armbar attempt on Jimmy but gets stacked up for two and the break. A headbutt just makes Riddle mad and he grabs a spinning gutwrench suplex to send Jey flying. Orton comes in and we hear about his hear in Ohio Valley Wrestling for a bit of a rarity. The threat of an RKO sends Jimmy bailing to the floor so it’s off to Jey, who stomps Orton down in the corner.

That just earns Jey a punch to the nose (simple, yet effective) and a trip to the floor, allowing Riddle to hit the springboard Floating Bro. A drop onto the barricade cuts Riddle off though and it’s back to Jimmy for the suicide dive. We slow things down a bit with Jey hammering away in the corner until Riddle manages a kick to the head. That’s way too soon for a hot tag to Orton though and Jimmy is back in with a chinlock.

Riddle fights up and manages a Bro To Sleep (which doesn’t make anything close to full contact), allowing Orton to come back in to clean house. Snap powerslams drop the Usos and Jey gets belly to back dropped onto the announcers’ table. Not to be outdone, Jimmy gets the same as McAfee is losing it even more than usual. Back in and the hanging DDT hits Jey but he’s fine enough to block the RKO.

Riddle is up again and kicks Jey in the head before nailing Jimmy with a running forearm. Jey manages to kick Riddle down for two and the pop up Samoan drop gets two. There’s a superkick to Riddle and a double superkick to Orton. The double superkick from either side gets two on Riddle, who kicks out and stays rigid for a weird moment. Riddle’s enziguri gets him out of trouble though and Orton gets a blind tag. Jimmy doesn’t notice though and his Superfly Splash is pulled into the RKO to give Orton the pin at 14:48.

Rating: B. Two of the best teams in WWE have a good match when they are given about fifteen minutes on a big stage. Sometimes these things write themselves and that was the case here, as Orton even managed to get in the cool RKO that he hits in these important matches. Another solid match on the show in what shouldn’t be a surprise at all. Now just do it again for the titles.

Raw – 4
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: vs. John Cena at Wrestlemania XXVIII. I’d say that counts, though it’s still hard to believe Cena lost.

Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce wait for Vince McMahon in his office. Vince comes back…and the egg is gone. The middle management goons are sent to find out who did it, saying if they don’t find out tonight, Vince will find out himself on Raw.

Video on Xia Li, the Protector, in comic book form. Yeah this was too cool to work and it never went anywhere.

Raw Women vs. Smackdown Women

Raw: Bianca Belair, Rhea Ripley, Liv Morgan, Carmella, Queen Zelina
Smackdown: Sasha Banks, Shayna Baszler, Shotzi, Toni Storm, Natalya

Zelina is still a queen and Ripley is half of the Women’s Tag Team Titles with Nikki Ash, which mean a grand total of nothing (Zelina and Carmella would win them the next night on Raw). Toni Storm (as announced in a completely necessary tweet earlier in the day) starts with Carmella, who drops Storm with a right hand. Hold on though as Carmella hands it off to Zelina before heading outside to put on her protective mask. It takes forever to put the mask on so Carmella has Zelina do it, allowing Storm to grab a rollup for the pin.

Belair and Banks come in for a Wrestlemania rematch but Shotzi tags herself in. A quick backsplash gets two on Belair but she’s right back up to knock Shotzi silly. Belair’s jumping splash gets two so Morgan comes in for a middle rope….uh, something, and a near fall. Natalya comes in for two off a snap suplex and a pinfall reversal sequence gets some near falls each. The step over basement dropkick gives Natalya two more but it’s off to Ripley to freshen things up.

Natalya doesn’t seem to mind and brings Baszler in for a double suplex. The jumping stomp to Baszler’s arm is blocked though and the slugout is on. Ripley has to fight out of an armbar as well as the Kirifuda Clutch, allowing her to stomp on Baszler’s head. Shotzi saves Baszler from the Riptide though and everything breaks down. Ripley breaks out of another choke and it’s a double tag to give us Belair vs. Banks.

Belair tries the power but gets pulled straight into the Bank Statement. That’s broken up so Banks sends her face first into the middle buckle, setting up a tornado DDT for two on Belair. Back up and Zelina tags herself in so Belair launches her at Banks for two more. No one will tag Banks so she has to block Zelina’s Code Red. Banks tags herself in and flips Zelina over into a cutter for the pin. Morgan comes in for a pinfall reversal sequence of her own until Oblivion connects to get rid of Storm.

Baszler comes in to choke Morgan and even kicks Ripley off the apron to prevent a tag (that’s smart). It’s off to Shotzi for a weird looking splash, followed by Banks’ frog splash to eliminate Morgan. Ripley comes in and muscles Banks up for a delayed suplex and a near fall. A missile dropkick sends Banks flying into the corner but Shotzi comes in off a blind tag. Shotzi offers a distraction so Baszler can come in with a knee to the face to pin Ripley, leaving Belair vs. Natalya, Shotzi, Banks and Baszler.

Belair comes in and suplexes Natalya for two before firing off the shoulders in the corner. Baszler’s distraction lets Natalya hit a powerbomb out of the corner for two and it’s off to Banks. Shotzi gets into it with Banks and pulls her to the floor where Banks gets counted out to make it 3-1.

Natalya comes in and Sharpshooters Belair, who rolls Natalya into Baszler for the break. A rollup finishes Natalya to make it 2-1, with Baszler coming in next. The Kirifuda Clutch is countered into a release Glam Slam to get rid of Baszler and it’s Shotzi vs. Belair. Shotzi grabs a choke in the corner and a faceplant drops Belair again. The running hip attack in the ropes gets two on Belair, who sends Shotzi into the corner and hits the KOD for the pin/win at 23:46.

Rating: C-. Well that was ridiculous. The last five minutes of this was Belair doing her best Super Cena impression, as she ran through three people on her own (four if you count getting rid of Banks). The match wasn’t anything special otherwise, as the Belair vs. Banks segment was the only thing worth seeing. This felt long until the ending, when it became one head shaking moment after another. Storm was trying and got a bit of a run, but this was all about making Belair look strong and to say they went overboard would be an understatement.

Raw – 5
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: The Rock is at the first Smackdown on FOX and rips on Baron Corbin/hangs out with Becky Lynch.

Paul Heyman knows nothing about the missing egg but thinks those people from BROOKLYN might have had something to do with it. That’s not what he is being asked about though: what about Brock Lesnar’s suspension being lifted soon? Uh, Heyman doesn’t want to talk about that either.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Big E. Last month, Big E. cashed in Money In The Bank to become the new Raw World Champion. The New Day celebrated because they’re a brotherhood, but Reigns said they were no Bloodline. Reigns broke Woods’ King Of The Ring crown and now it’s time for a clash between World Champions.

Big E. (Raw) vs. Roman Reigns (Smackdown)

Paul Heyman is here too as we hear about their time together in FCW. They fight over a lockup to start with neither getting anywhere, meaning it’s off to another staredown. Big E. shoves him a bit and Reigns bails to the floor, where Heyman lists off some Anoa’i family members at the table. Back in and Reigns hits the jumping clothesline for two before stomping away rather hard.

An elbow drops Reigns and Big E. gets to talk a bit of trash to set up the missed apron splash. Big E. comes up favoring his knee and you know Reigns is happy with that. Back in and the chinlock goes on for a bit until Big E. powers up for the break. You don’t do that to Reigns, who boots Big E. down for two more. Big E. is sent outside again as Reigns is getting frustrated and growling at the crowd. A reversed whip into the steps puts Reigns in trouble for a change and some belly to bellies make it worse back inside.

The Warrior Splash connects but Big E. charges into a Samoan drop for two. Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines until Big E. Rock Bottoms him out of said corner for two of his own. The Stretch Muffler has Reigns in trouble so he powers up into a sitout powerbomb to rock Big E. again. A Rock Bottom gets two more as they’re sticking with the big shots here. Two Superman Punches only keep Big E. down for a few seconds so Reigns hits a third…but Big E. is back up before the spear can even launch.

Reigns is sent to the apron for the spear out to the floor but comes right back in with his own spear (minus through the ropes) for a rather near fall. They take their time getting up, with Reigns talking about how Big E. doesn’t deserve to be here. The guillotine is broken up but Big E. tries another spear through the ropes and gets caught in the choke. Reigns gets it on again back inside, only to muscle Reigns up into the Big Ending for two.

They head outside again, with Big E. fired up this time as he sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table. A posting and ram into the barricade have Reigns in more trouble but he’s fine enough to send Big E. knees first into the steps. A Superman Punch off the steps lets Reigns kick the knee out and hit a spear for the pin at 21:56.

Rating: B. It took some time to get going and could have had a few minutes cut out, but this was a heck of a fight. The problem here though was there was no reason to believe Reigns would lose. Big E. is great, but winning the title via Money in the Bank makes him feel a step beneath Reigns, in addition to the fact that Reigns already feels like a bigger star than anyone else at the moment. Big E. was trying here, but you know Reigns getting pinned is going to be a huge moment, not something in a stand alone show like this one.

Raw – 5
Smackdown – 2

Overall Rating: B-. This show is going to depend on how you look at it. While the wrestling was mostly good, with the main event and men’s Survivor Series match carrying it, the biggest problem is NOTHING HAPPENED. Raw dominated the head to head competition and there was nothing on here that I felt like I needed to see. Reigns is still the unstoppable force and whoever got the red shirts this year had a strong night. What else is there to say about the wrestling with non-existent stakes?

Then you have everything else and it was just sad. The Rock obsession was cool and made sense, but without him actually having anything to do with the show the impact kind of falls apart. I know he’s busy, but if he isn’t going to be there, maybe don’t focus on him so much. The egg stuff was stupid, though I can’t fault WWE for trying to make money and it was relatively short.

Overall, as has been the case for a long time, there was enough good to pretty good action to make the show a decent watch, but there is absolutely nothing from a storyline perspective. The Battle For Brand Supremacy stuff worked for a few years but now WWE has given up on it meaning anything, so why should I care about what they’re doing? Good enough show, but totally unimportant.

Ratings Comparison

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Damian Priest

Original: C+
Redo: C

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B+
Redo: B+

Raw Men vs. Smackdown Men

Original: B-
Redo: B

Battle Royal

Original: C
Redo: C

Usos vs. RKBro

Original: C+
Redo: B

Smackdown Women vs. Raw Women

Original: C-
Redo: C-

Big E. vs. Roman Reigns

Original: B
Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Oh yeah this is about as similar as it gets.

 

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Smackdown – July 4, 2008: They Did It Better Than Raw

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2008
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

We’re into the new reality around here as both Night Of Champions and the full Draft are done. There is only one World Champion after Edge lost his title to CM Punk on Raw, meaning HHH is once again on top. Other than that, we should get to see how some of the new stars mesh with what’s left of the old. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the 4th of July and talks about how the wrestlers get to live the American Dream with live action fireworks.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP wastes no time in bringing out his guest, the still World Champion HHH. After a nice hello, MVP congratulates HHH on his win at Night Of Champions and welcomes him to Smackdown. It’s been a long time since HHH has been here but he is already a big fan of MVP. HHH appreciates the bling and the Power Ranger outfit that MVP wears when he wrestles.

MVP says it’s cutting edge technology and Olympians wear it to compete. HHH says that sounds like a performance enhancer and MVP might get thirty days off. With that shrugged off, MVP brings up that he makes more money than HHH, who could see how that would make some people angry. Not that it matters as he would rather be a 12 time World Champion rather than the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history.

HHH is out here to get a rub from MVP though and he has some special footage. MVP doesn’t like that, so he says let’s play footage instead. We get a recap of CM Punk winning the Raw World Title and retaining it over JBL in the main event, followed by a brawl with security to end the show. Back in the arena, HHH says Edge got Punked out and MVP says Edge got his punk card pulled.

The jokes continue until Vickie Guerrero, back in the wheelchair, interrupts. HHH wishes her well on her upcoming wedding. HHH: “Imagine: marrying the boss to get ahead. Who thinks up that kind of stuff?” HHH thinks she and Edge just need to go to Vegas because he knows a great drive thru place. You don’t even need to be conscious!

Vickie brags about Edge’s success against Batista, but HHH says looking at her, there are things Edge would do that HHH would never do. Vickie doesn’t get what he means but eventually tells him to shut up. Edge is on his way here and speaking of Edge, HHH will be defending the title against him at the Great American Bash.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria vs. Cherry vs. Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

Star on a pole match with the winner facing Natalya, on commentary and now a redhead, for the Divas Title. A quick brawl to start leaves Kelly as the only one standing but Victoria knocks her off the pole. Cherry cuts Victoria off before Maryse has to knock Michelle down. A double electric chair drops Maryse and Cherry catapults Kelly into the corner. Victoria adds the slingshot flipping legdrop to Cherry and goes up. That’s cut off as well so Michelle kicks Maryse down and wins.

Rating: D+. What are you supposed to say about this? It’s the kind of match that is all about one thing and not exactly having much to do with wrestling. This felt like something out of another company and it really doesn’t fit with what they’ve been trying with the women in recent weeks. Michelle finally gets put into the title match, which is long overdue as she has been the obvious pick for a long time now.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in to see Vickie Guerrero, who wants to know where Edge is. They don’t know, so she asks them about Edge losing the title on Raw. Vickie blames them both and gives them a match with Jesse and Festus. That’s a punishment?

Edge arrives and a lot of people look at him in silence.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Jesse And Festus

Festus is dressed as Uncle Sam. Hawkins and Ryder jump Festus to start and are quickly shrugged off, setting up a middle rope Hart Attack. Jesse has to fight out of a double team in the corner but gets pulled into another corner to begin the beating. Hawkins grabs a Russian legsweep for two and we hit the neck crank. Jesse is able to get over to the corner for the tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. With Hawkins sent to the floor, a seated senton and the fireman’s carry flapjack (with a great sell from Ryder) finishes for Festus.

Rating: C. This was in fact a Jesse and Festus match and that’s about as good as it’s going to get for them. The team isn’t overly interesting and the one joke of Festus losing it at the bell has long since used up its usefulness. It’s not like Hawkins and Ryder are great, but they’re a heck of a lot better than the other choice.

Post match Edge comes to the ring and beats on the catatonic Festus as Hawkins and Ryder make Jesse watch. Edge throws in a nasty chair shot to the head and stares down at Festus.

Post match Vickie Guerrero tries to calm Edge down but even the Great American Bash match doesn’t make it better. Vickie mentions giving him permission and Edge loses it, saying she doesn’t understand what is going on. He has been at this for sixteen years to the day but Vickie cuts him off, saying she is still his boss. She calls him a fool and Edge storms out.

Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison

Hardy shoves him down to start so Morrison grabs the arm to slow things down. Morrison gets sent outside and a slingshot dive….doesn’t launch as Hardy head fakes him instead, setting up a dive off the apron instead. Back in and Morrison hits a running knee to the face for two but the Flying Chuck misses. Hardy’s slingshot dropkick in the corner is broken up though and Morrison drops him out to the floor in a crash.

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on an armbar before blocking a Whisper In The Wind attempt. The armbar goes back on, allowing commentary to talk about Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Morrison cuts off a comeback attempt by sending him shoulder first into the post but Hardy counters a dive with a sitout powerbomb. Hardy fights up with some forearms and a cradle gets two. The Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two but Morrison Pele kicks him on top. The Moonlight Drive doesn’t work for Morrison though and it’s the Swanton to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was the “Hardy is here and he’s good on his own” match of the show. It worked well with these two showing the same chemistry they’ve had before, with Hardy showcasing his ability to fight from behind. Morrison feels good on his own too, making for a nice match.

Video on Maria.

Umaga vs. Funaki

Umaga wastes no time in knocking him into the corner and a superkick puts Funaki down as well. Foley even goes inter promotional by saying this is like Mark Henry beating up Colin Delaney on ECW. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike for the squash pin.

Edge is ranting to Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder when he is told that Vickie Guerrero wants to see him. He goes to Vickie’s office, where she goes on about how she is going to be in the wheelchair with back problems for life (keeping in mind that she was standing earlier tonight). Edge says not to talk to her in that gibberish, so Vickie screams at him to GET OUT. That’s exactly what he does, with the door closing behind him. Edge walks a bit, then turns around and tries to get back in, but the door is locked.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. It’s a brawl to start with Matt running Kennedy over but Kennedy is back up with a kick to the face. Kennedy clotheslines Chavo in the corner but Benjamin is back up with a kick of his own. Chavo is back up to take Benjamin down, only to have Benjamin toss him into the air for a nasty crash. Matt and Kennedy put the other two down before knocking each other down as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy cleaning house as Foley compares this to Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. Everyone but Chavo is caught in a Tower Of Doom but Benjamin is up to suplex Chavo down. Neely distracts Benjamin though and Chavo gets to Three Amigos Matt. The frog splash gets two as Kennedy makes the save. Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate on Chavo before dropping Kennedy onto Neely. Benjamin comes in and gets Twist of Fated onto Chavo, with Matt pinning the latter to retain.

Rating: B-. I believe they call this a sprint, as they were packing in whatever they could for about ten minutes. The 4th of July aspect meant that this more or less had to be the main event and it was a good match as a result. Matt retaining is a fine way to go too, even if getting the US Title off of ECW is not a bad idea.

Here is Edge, without music, for a chat. Edge says this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was attacked twice on Raw and now he is going to get the World Title back at the Great American Bash. Ever since he came in here tonight, he was feeling the disrespect, including from Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder, who should have been trying to make him happy.

He didn’t even receive the support of Vickie Guerrero, who should be there for him in his time of need. Therefore, Edge is going to let us in on some dirty little secrets, but here is a screeching Vickie (walking) to interrupt. She asks what Edge is doing so Edge walks up to her. Edge says the wedding is off, leaving Vickie to scream a lot and take off her ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good enough here (ignoring the stupid women’s match) and having Edge’s breakdown throughout the show made it work better. They have at least a main event set for the Great American bash and there is time to set up the rest of the card. Nice show here, as they didn’t have a bad lull after getting the new roster set up.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 27, 2008: Find Your Balance

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,748
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

The Draft has come and gone and now we have a new lineup around here. Some of the moves should make for some nice changes, though this is also the go home show for Sunday’s Night Of Champions. It should be interesting to see what happens with the new stars and the old stories, though Night Of Champions could be quite the endpoint for a lot of stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Draft recap.

Vickie Guerrero is rather sad as we hear about Vince McMahon nearly being crushed during Million Dollar Mania. She hopes Vince isn’t confined to a wheelchair like she is. That moves us on to how great Smackdown is, because she and Edge are getting married soon. With that out of the way, here’s new broadcaster Jim Ross!

Here is HHH to get things going. He talks about how crazy Vince McMahon is and makes jokes about how everything came crashing down on him. Anyway, for the first time in six years, he’s part of Smackdown and he sees the familiar faces of Mick Foley and Jim Ross. HHH says jr would be the one person he would pick to bring here with him (JR: “Thank you.”) so he’s home.

HHH gets in the self described sucking up to the fans before getting to the self described shilling of Sunday’s pay per view. The title is what matters so here is Edge to interrupt. Edge says this is special and big because the two best around are in the ring. He’s heard rumors that they can’t get along but Edge thinks they can make it work. HHH says they both have massive egos and he can see that his is way bigger than Edge’s.

The other difference: HHH will still be champion after Night Of Champions. Edge points out that he can actually beat Batista, unlike HHH. This is Edge’s house and show, so HHH needs to show him some respect. Cue Batista to interrupt and spear Edge down without much trouble. Batista even steals the title for a bonus. That was kind of a cool segment, with the mini Evolution reunion working.

Kane/Big Show vs. MVP/Mark Henry

Henry has been added to the ECW Title match at Night Of Champions after beating Kane on ECW. Kane and MVP start things off with the latter kicking away at the legs until an uppercut drops MVP. It’s off to Show to unload in the corner and knock MVP down without much effort. Henry comes in to cut off the power advantage so it’s right back to Kane. It doesn’t go so well this time around as Henry takes him into the corner for a boot to the head from MVP. Kane fights up so MVP tells Henry to do this himself and leaves…but Henry throws him back inside. The chokeslam gives Kane the fast pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and Kane continuing his dominance of MVP is amusing for some reason. It makes sense to keep everyone but MVP strong as MVP doesn’t exactly have much going on at the moment. This was more about letting Kane get some heat back after his loss to Henry on ECW and it worked just fine all things considered.

Vickie Guerrero discusses wedding plans with Alicia Fox but Edge interrupts. Vickie tells him to not worry about Batista because he’ll be gone. He’ll even get the title back tonight.

Video on Umaga.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Ryder drives Finlay into the corner to start but an atomic drop breaks that up in a hurry. Hawkins comes in and misses a baseball slide, allowing Finlay to unload with forearms. Back up and Finlay sends Hawkins outside, setting up the Celtic Cross to Ryder. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come out for the staredown.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Edge grabs a drop toehold to continue to technical opening. Back up and Matt hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for two as commentary isn’t sure if that would be an upset (yes, it would be). We take a break and come back with Matt blocking the Edge-O-Matic. Edge gets sent outside and Matt nails a clothesline off the apron but a cheap shot cuts Matt off back inside.

Choking on the ropes sets up a running crotch attack to the back of the neck and Edge kicks him in the chest. The cravate has Matt in more trouble but he fights up and grabs the Side Effect for two. That lets Foley get in a Get Smart reference, making him all the more swell. A DDT gives Matt two but he misses the moonsault. Edge misses the spear but gets two off a backslide with his feet on his rope. Back up and the Twist of Fate is countered into the spear to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and the ending sequence was good. I’m not wild on seeing the US Champion losing but at least it was to someone higher up on the food chain. Edge gets some momentum heading into his title match on Sunday while Matt…eh he’s defending against Chavo Guerrero so he’ll be fine.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Victoria/Natalya Neidhart/Maryse

Michelle and Maryse start things off with Michelle cranking on the arm. Maryse immediately bails out to bring Victoria in, with Kelly coming in as well. Foley remembers wearing chaps like Kelly and JR backs away as fast as he can. Cherry comes in and bulldogs Kelly for two as they’re rapid firing through the tags. It’s back to Michelle for a basement dropkick on Natalya, who is right back with the a wheelbarrow hot shot. The surfboard has Michelle in more trouble, followed by the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a chinlock but Victoria comes in to cut Michelle off again. The standing moonsault gives Victoria two as Foley wants to see more of Kelly’s chaps. Foley: “I’m just trying to give you a little Jerry The King Lawler JR.” Kelly gets in a kick to the ribs, setting up one of the most freezing cold tags I’ve ever seen as Cherry comes in. A neckbreaker gets two on Maryse but Natalya gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Everything breaks down and Maryse rolls Cherry up for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly good and I have no idea why they haven’t just announced Michelle for the title match yet. She’s the most obvious pick they could have but they’re still playing the “who is it going to be” nonsense. Am I supposed to believe that Cherry is getting a title shot? Anyway, this match was pretty lame, as it was almost Michelle in a handicap match.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Domino

Kozlov powers him into the corner to start and works on the arm. A shot to the chest sets up an overhead belly to belly suplex but Domino manages to drop him with a jumping elbow. Back up and Kozlov kicks him in the face, setting up the reverse DDT for the pin, though he had to work a bit more here.

Rey Mysterio, on the way to the ring for his final Smackdown appearance, runs into Hornswoggle for some odd…uh, looking at each other.

Here is Rey Mysterio for his final Smackdown appearance. He came to Smackdown six years ago with a heart full of dreams. Thanks to the fans, he became Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion and the World Heavyweight Champion. Smackdown will always have a place in his heart but now he is heading to Raw. The fans are offered to come along with him and we get some nice words in Spanish to wrap things up.

Batista vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and then breaks up an early Batista Bomb attempt. A splash gives Umaga two and there’s a hard kick to the back of Batista’s head. Batista gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Umaga cuts off the comeback with a kick to the face and a jumping headbutt puts him down again. We’re off to another nerve hold but Batista fights up. A slam attempt doesn’t work so Umaga knocks him back into the corner to hammer away some more. Umaga misses a splash and hits the ring post though and there’s the spinebuster. Cue La Familia to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not the most exciting match here as Umaga almost squashed him until the run-in ending. Umaga needed the boost after spinning his wheels for a long time, though having him do this to the #1 contender was a little strange. The bigger problem here was the match being rather slow though as these two have never had much chemistry together.

Post match the big beatdown is on but HHH makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts here but it wasn’t their best show. The problem is they were trying to build to the show with the old lineup but then had to introduce the new wrestlers. That made for a weird balance and they only kind o pulled it off. Things will be in their new normal next week though and that should make things a lot better.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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