Backlash 2016
Date: September 11, 2016
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga

It’s the first single branded pay per view and I’m really not sure what they’re going to do to fill in the whole show. There are currently six scheduled matches but word on the street is that one of them might not be taking place as advertised due to an injury. They could always add some stuff in but at the moment, this isn’t looking like a three hour show. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Apollo Crews vs. Baron Corbin

This was made on the pre-show when Corbin interrupted Crews’ chat with Daniel Bryan. They lock up to start with Corbin shoving him away, only to have Crews come back with a dropkick. A right hand stops a springboard and knocks Crews to the floor (signature spot) as we take a break. Back with Crews hitting an enziguri from the apron and avoiding a charge but Corbin slides under the ropes and back inside for a clothesline to the back of the head.

Corbin talks a little trash and takes Apollo’s head off with another clothesline. A running knee (because of course) puts Corbin down and the second jumping enziguri gets two. An Angle Slam of all things gets two more on Baron but he hits the Deep Six for the same. They actually head outside with Corbin going into the steps for a seven count. Back in and Crews charges into a knee (it’s always the knee) to set up End of Days for the pin at 9:56.

Rating: C+. This was actually a lot better than I was expecting with some ice chemistry from the pair. Corbin winning is fine as he needs something to do but Crews needs to start winning people people stop caring about him. Above all else though: the pre-show had ONE match that ran about ten minutes and now we’re almost ready to go with the regular show. Yes I said ONE MATCH instead of three with half an hour between each one. I really don’t think people are going to miss the other two and the fans might even be a bit less burned out later on. Imagine that.

We open with a text crawl about September 11 and what it means for our freedom. Nothing wrong with this whatsoever and you knew it was coming.

Opening video of Shane McMahon talking about how this is the new vision and a new era, including new champions being crowned for the first time.

Here are Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan to open things up. Shane brags about how awesome the fans and everyone behind the scenes have been. The internet has been blowing up and the red team is getting a run of its money. They talk about the new titles and Shane introduces the Women’s Title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Naomi vs. Nikki Bella vs. Carmella vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Natalya

The title is vacant coming in and this is under elimination rules. Otunga calls Naomi his dark horse with the glow and I’m not daring to touch that one. Nikki is in red, white and blue to hammer home the fact that she’s our fearless hero. Bliss on the other hand is Harley Quinn for a VERY nice look. There are no tags so it’s a wild brawl to start with Nikki being clotheslined to the floor (and being fearless enough to put her foot on the bottom rope to shove herself off before anyone was touching her), leaving Becky to work on Naomi’s arm.

We get the dancing kicks (JBL: “Be glad she only has two feet and not eight.” Uh, right. It’s off to the showdown between Nikki and Carmella and WOW it’s even less interesting than I thought it would be. Bliss makes the save and hits her moonsault knees for two on Naomi. Becky comes back in and it’s time for the parade of secondary finishers, capped off by Carmella brawling with Nikki.

The Alabama Slam gets two on Carmella and Natalya comes back in for a Tower of Doom (a name they thankfully don’t use tonight). Alexa comes back in with a sunset flip out of the corner for two before Carmella sends everyone outside, leaving Naomi to dive onto all of them. Back in and Natalya loads up a powerbomb out of the corner with Naomi adding a Blockbuster to get rid of Bliss at 9:39.

Nikki hits her big forearm on Naomi but Natalya wants the elimination instead and the Sharpshooter makes Naomi tap at 10:54. Nikki’s TKO gets rid of Natalya at 11:57 but Carmella rolls Nikki up for the elimination at 12:04. We’re down to Carmella vs. Becky with Lynch getting in her usual stuff until she runs into a superkick. Not that it matters as Becky grabs the Disarm-Her for the tap out and the title at 14:35.

Rating: C+. This was fun stuff and Becky winning is a nice surprise (though you can imagine Nikki getting the title by the Rumble at the latest). Above all else though, it didn’t feel like they were stretching out to fill in time. Carmella had a good performance here but she and Alexa are still a long way away from the top level. Naomi continues to be worthless save for one spot a match.

Becky gets promo time post match and we get the WAY overused “you deserve it” chant.

Miz yells at a kid from Nickelodeon, who offers Miz a spot on his show. “Unless you can get John Cena instead.”

Bray Wyatt attacks Randy Orton and injures his ankle to cover up for Orton not being medically cleared to compete. They really, really should have done this on TV instead of a bait and switch like this. They were even promoting it on the pre-show and it’s a very cheap move.

Usos vs. Hype Bros

The winners face Heath Slater/Rhyno later in the night to replace the injured American Alpha. The Usos have new gear and Jimmy wrestles in a shirt (thank goodness). Mojo throws Jey around to start but it’s quickly off to Zack for a facebuster on Jimmy. Ryder knocks both twins to the floor and Mojo runs all the way around the ring to run them over in a cool power display.

Back in and the Usos start with the double teaming to send Ryder right back to the floor. The running Umaga attack sets up a chinlock, followed by another chinlock to keep things fresh. Zack sends them outside again and the double tag brings in Mojo as the crowd isn’t all that thrilled. Something like an F5 gets two on Jey and Ryder adds a middle rope hurricanrana for two. Everything breaks down and the Usos go after Ryder’s leg, setting up a Tequila Sunrise to make Ryder tap at 10:11.

Rating: C-. Now this felt like they were dragging it out. The knee stuff from the Usos made sense and there was next to no doubt that the Usos were going over here as you don’t have Hype Bros vs. Slater/Rhyno twice in a week. It’s not a bad match but this was clearly filler and they weren’t making any secret about it.

Slater and Rhyno are ready but Heath has an upset stomach due to some artificial crab dip. Rhyno: “Heath, we’re still live.” Heath: “Uh…..YOU’VE BEEN SWERVED!”

Connor’s Cure video.

We recap Dolph Ziggler vs. the Miz for the Intercontinental Title. Daniel Bryan had accused Miz of being soft but since Bryan can’t wrestle, Miz got to feud with Ziggler instead. Dolph had been wanting to win the big one and the Intercontinental Title seems to suffice.

We cut to Miz in the back where he tells Bryan he wants to renegotiate his contract. Bryan says nothing and Miz laughs at the idea of Bryan calling him a coward. Miz: “I want you to watch me do what you can’t anymore.”

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is defending and is quickly sent outside to start. Back in and Ziggler tries some amateur stuff until Miz punches him in the face to take over. We get some choking on the ropes until Miz counters a dropkick and catapults Ziggler out to the floor. Miz grabs a chinlock as they’re taking their time for obvious reasons.

It’s off to a surfboard before Miz does the YES pose. Oh man they’re teasing the heck out of this but I’m not sure how they’re going to pay it off. Miz’s running corner clothesline looks to set up the top rope ax handle but Ziggler rolls him up for two instead. Ziggler makes his comeback with the usual and sends Miz shoulder first into the post.

Miz comes right back with a slingshot sitout powerbomb (sweet) before hitting a kind of Stunner on the leg. A quick Fameasser gets two for Dolph and he grabs the sleeper to slow Miz down. They trade DDT’s before Miz gets the Figure Four for a good while before Ziggler gets the rope.

This is getting a lot of time so far and it’s only kind of feeling like they’re stretching it out. Miz up but charges into a superkick for two with the champ getting his foot on the rope. Miz bails to the floor and has to be thrown back in, allowing Maryse to spray Ziggler in the eyes with something. The Skull Crushing Finale is enough for the retaining pin at 18:11.

Rating: B. I liked this more than I was expecting but that’s not really surprising with the roll Miz is on at this point. I’m sure this is going to set up a rematch because we just can’t get rid of Ziggler because HE’S IMPORTANT AND GETS SO CLOSE TO WINNING THE BIG ONE WHICH GETS SMALLER AND SMALLER EVERY SINGLE TIME. Miz vs. Bryan would be very interesting but I’d be really surprised if they actually went with that as Bryan’s one last match.

The pre-show panel has a chat.

Here’s Bray with no video or introduction as Orton is injured. The injury is announced and we get a ten count but we have a replacement match and it’s no holds barred.

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

I had the name written before the music hit because of course it’s Kane. They’re quickly on the floor with Kane knocking the bell out of Bray’s hands. Back in and Bray’s cross body has Kane in trouble, followed by a chair to the knee to make it even worse. Another chair shot gets two on Kane until he grabs a running DDT. The side slam looks to set up a chokeslam but Bray takes it outside again.

Bray does Orton’s pose and drops the running backsplash through a table for the big spot. The fans seem very pleased here after booing the heck out of the match announcement. Back in and Sister Abigail is countered into a chokeslam for two. Bray gets the same off a Rock Bottom onto a chair, only to have Orton come out for an RKO. Kane adds a chokeslam for the pin at 10:58.

Rating: C. GAH! I’m so freaking sick of Bray losing time after time after time after time for the sake of setting up what’s likely to be another loss because Bray is bulletproof or whatever. He’s been on the main roster for three years and I can’t remember the last big win he had. The fans are DYING to cheer for him but no, instead let’s have him job to freaking KANE to make us want to see him fight Orton later.

Someone explain why that booking is supposed to make sense. Please. I’d LOVE to hear how that makes sense. It’s Orton fighting a loser who couldn’t even get on the 18 hour Summerslam but now I want to see Bray vs. Orton on pay per view. Just turn him face already like you were planning to do and FREAKING DID AT ONE POINT instead of having him do the same stuff for years. The match was fine for a house show style match but that ending drove me nuts.

AJ Styles tells some nameless jobbers that they’re destined for failure.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Rhyno/Heath Slater

For the inaugural titles. Slater goes after Jey to start before it’s off to Rhyno for some power slots. Heath comes back in but is taken outside for a double suplex into the post (cool). Back in and Slater is slowly beaten down as the back work continues. The fans want Rhyno but get a chinlock from Jey instead.

Slater fights up and we get the double cross body spot to set up the hot tag. Rhyno comes in (to a very nice reaction) but misses the Gore. Heath tags himself back in and hits a neckbreaker on both twins, followed by a DDT for two on Jimmy. The superkick nails Heath but Rhyno hits the Gore to give Slater the pin at 9:57.

Rating: C. I smiled. They won’t hold the titles long and that’s the best idea but this was absolutely fine and the right move at the time. American Alpha can get the belts later but this wraps up Heath Needs A Job and gives the fans a fun moment. Above all else: WWE had something with Slater and they actually did something with it. They ignore that kind of thing WAY too often and it’s such a waste of someone getting over. This is as high as Slater needs to go and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Slater and Rhyno are happy with the win and this sums up everything: “Yo Beulah! WE’RE GETTING A DOUBLE WIDE BABY!!!”

Miz vs. Ziggler chicken deal.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Dean Ambrose which doesn’t have much of a story. Styles beat John Cena last month at Summerslam and has a title shot as a result. Dean doesn’t seem to be taking Styles seriously though.

Smackdown World Title: Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles

Dean is defending. Feeling out process to start with Dean being driven into the ropes. AJ: “I OWN YOU!” A forearm puts a seated Dean down again but he comes back with his awkward slugging, followed by a backdrop to send AJ outside. The suicide dive is broken up though and AJ starts in on the neck before going with the drop down into the dropkick.

Dean comes up holding his nose but makes a comeback anyway by whipping AJ into the corner. That goes nowhere good either as Dean misses a charge into the post. They’re going with the idea that Dean is doing his normal insane style but AJ knows exactly what he’s going to do and is one step ahead. Dean is back up and tries a belly to back superplex but flips AJ over for a big crash to put both guys down.

AJ dives into a spinning Rock Bottom backbreaker of all things for two (makes sense as Dean used something new) and the standing elbow to the floor has AJ in even more trouble. They head inside again with Dean getting suplexed into the corner (becoming a common move lately). Now it’s AJ going after the leg with a standing Robinsdale Crunch out of the corner and the Calf Crusher is on.

Dean makes the ropes so AJ puts the hold on again in the middle of the ring. In a clever counter, Dean grabs the head and slams AJ’s head into the mat over and over. Dean fights up and goes outside for a clothesline, followed by a running bulldog for two back inside. AJ’s fireman’s carry into a backbreaker gets two, followed by a torture rack into a powerbomb for the same.

The springboard 450 gets the same and AJ is stunned. Dean comes back again and hits his running dropkick to knock AJ outside. That means it’s finally table time but instead Dean sends him into the crowd for a suicide dive. It’s not a countout though as they head back inside with a Pele sending Dean into the ropes for the rebound lariat. The ref is bumped though (of course) and a low blow sets up the Styles Clash to give us a new champion at 24:59.

Rating: B+. The ending was the only possible option and that’s the best thing they’ve done all night. They did a great job here with the idea of Dean not being able to keep up with AJ who was just on his game tonight. Dean never really felt like a real World Champion to me so having him lose to the best thing on Smackdown was the right call. Really good match here and the best thing on the show, which had to be expected.

AJ celebrates and we’re out at 10:38.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a really weird one to grade as the ultra low expectations did it a lot of favors. Unfortunately it’s a show that didn’t need to exist and needed a lot of things dragged out to make it work as well as it did. Smackdown is dying for some midcard talent as they had one of the shortest pay per views in a long time and that only worked with a team working twice and the opening match not starting until over fifteen minutes into the show. I liked this as well as I could have given the circumstances but they really need to fix some big problems.

Results

Becky Lynch b. Carmella, Nikki Bella, Natalya, Alexa Bliss and Naomi – Disarm-Her to Carmella

Usos b. Hype Bros – Tequila Sunrise to Ryder

The Miz b. Dolph Ziggler – Skull Crushing Finale

Kane b. Bray Wyatt – Chokeslam

Rhyno/Heath Slater b. Usos – Gore to Jimmy

AJ Styles b. Dean Ambrose – Styles Clash

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Let’s see: college football, first weekend of the NFL, see how the Cleveland Indians manager to screw up the division lead this year. Yeah it’s kind of a bor……Backlash? That’s this weekend? Apparently it is despite feeling like it’s lacking another two or three weeks worth of building. It probably doesn’t help that we’re only three weeks removed from the marathon that was Summerslam weekend and there’s barely enough material for a pay per view.

There’s no pre-show match announced yet so let’s start with the precursor to the Tag Team Title match as the Usos are facing the Hype Bros in what you could kind of call the third semifinal match. American Alpha had advanced to the finals to face Heath Slater/Rhyno for the titles but the Usos turned heel and then did so again after the match to injure Chad Gable’s knee, leaving us with only one team for the tournament final. Therefore we’ll be seeing the two teams that lost in the semifinals fight each other with the winners going to the title match.

Save for an American Alpha run-in, I see no reason for the Usos to not win here and go on to face Slater/Rhyno. There isn’t much else to say on this one as Slater/Rhyno already beat the Hype Bros earlier this week (making it even clearer that this match is filler) so the Usos are the only real option. So yeah, the Usos go on as is the only real option here.

That leaves us with the Usos vs. Slater/Rhyno for the titles and I’m really not sure where you go here. There’s a very easy case for the Usos getting the belts to give them credibility (the announcers have made sure to mention that the Usos are the only team in the tournament to ever hold titles in WWE) and of course to set up the rematch with American Alpha, who beat them clean in less than a minute.

On the other hand I’m not sure how long they can string out the “Heath wants a job” angle until they have to give him something. Slater/Rhyno as the first champions would be just fine as American Alpha and the Usos can have a #1 contenders feud and then win the belts while the first champs do comedy. All that being said, the Usos are the logical pick here and I’ll go with them, despite it being stupid to have heels wrestle twice in one night to win a title.

We’ll stick with the title matches as it’s off to Miz defending the Intercontinental Title against Dolph Ziggler. If you’ve been reading my stuff lately, you know I’m really not a fan of this feud and that hasn’t changed. The story here works: they’ve built up Miz as a pretty good champion (if he holds the title another two weeks it’s the longest reign in five years) who is enough of a veteran that he can be a bigger player on Smackdown, especially with what they were teasing with Bryan. Ziggler needs a big win (though remember: it’s DEFENDING the title that matters, not actually winning it) and this is suddenly a big enough deal.

That brings us to the problem: it’s Dolph Ziggler vs. the Miz. These guys have fought a ton of times (four times on TV this year alone) and none of them have been exactly what you would call thrilling. The match will be fine but the buildup to it with both guys wanting to move up the ladder into serious contention should be calling for something special, not something we’ve seen several times before and said “eh not bad” much more often than not. I’ll take Miz to retain the title here but Ziggler going over really wouldn’t shock me as they’re obsessed with pushing him for reasons I really don’t buy.

We’ll get to one of the bigger matches now with Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt and again I’m worried about what they’re going to do here. Orton really, really needs a win after that debacle against Lesnar last month but Bray really needs a win…….well always because he hardly ever wins anything important.

The problem here is there’s only a limited story aside from Wyatt’s traditional “I choose to haunt you” idea which ran out of gas a long time ago. I’m sure it’s going to be entertaining but this feels like a lot of going through the motions instead of giving us something that should be good. I’ll go with Orton here but a no contest or countout/DQ ending would be the better option.

Next up is the Six Pack Challenge for the inaugural Smackdown Women’s Title and I’ll spare you the time by saying this should be Nikki Bella’s to lose. Naomi is the athletic woman who probably won’t win, Alexa Bliss and Carmella are miles away from being ready and Natalya has less charisma than even your average Canadian wrestler. That leaves Nikki and Becky Lynch as the only real options and you know full well that we need a good Bella comeback story after the neck injury that we all sat up crying over because we might never get to hear her call herself fearless again. So yeah, Nikki wins because it’s all about the Bellas.

That leaves us with the main event and as is the case with almost anything else on the card, I really don’t care. Dean Ambrose is defending the Smackdown World Title against AJ Styles and that’s about the extent of their issue. They’ve tried to force in the idea that Dean isn’t taking this seriously and AJ is the uncrowned champion after pinning Cena and…..yeah that’s about it. Aside from a rematch, I really don’t see a reason for AJ to not get the title here. He’s the best on Smackdown and can hold the title for a few months until hopefully someone switches shows to mix things up a bit and give him a fresh challenger.

So that’s Backlash and I’m lucky that I stayed awake while I wrote this up. No matter how you slice it, this show really isn’t interesting and doesn’t need to be a pay per view. The biggest thing here though is this doesn’t feel like a three hour pay per view. We haven’t seen a single brand show yet so maybe they’ll speed things up a bit.

Let’s say the main event and Orton vs. Wyatt eat up an hour combined (that’s probably a big stretch even when you include entrances). A Six Pack Challenge, two tag matches and Miz vs. Ziggler isn’t enough to fill in two hours. I’d be really surprised if this show runs three hours unless they add in some nothing matches like Baron Corbin vs. Kalisto (Is that still a thing?) or Kane squashing Breezango for reasons of general stupidity.

Length issues aside, I’m really not interested in this show and I haven’t seen many who are. Smackdown has been the better of the two shows but they’re a long way away from being able to pull off a three hour pay per view with just the stuff they have. Just let the show run a little shorter and people will be a lot happier. I don’t think the Network subscriptions are going to plummet if one of the seven bonus pay per views a year is a little shorter than average.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: September 6, 2016
Location: Pinnacle Bank Arena, Lincoln, Nebraska
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga

I’m not sure how but we’re already at the go home show for Backlash. At this point there are five announced matches (assuming you count a tournament final as an announced match) which means we’re going to get a lot more stuff announced tonight or Sunday’s matches are going to be very long. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Daniel Bryan is in the ring with the Smackdown Women’s Title. Sunday’s Six Pack Challenge will be an elimination match (there’s how they fill in some time) but before we get there, we’ll be having a six women tag match. First though, we’re going to have a forum with all six getting some time to talk. We’ll start with Becky Lynch but before she can say anything, Daniel has to plug Total Bellas.

The fans clearly aren’t interested so Bryan lets Becky talk about being the #1 female Smackdown draft pick. Her journey has brought her here but Natalya cuts her off. Natalya says the Draft was the worst night of her career because Smackdown was supposed to be her kingdom but now she has to put up with Becky and the unnatural hair.

Cue Alexa Bliss to say they’re both whiners and calls Bryan a Bella trophy husband. Now it’s Carmella cutting them because women in WWE can’t let anyone else get more than a few words out. Everyone gets catty about nicknames and the villains accuse Becky of turning them all against each other. Naomi and Nikki run out for the save and the villains leave. This was fine for a quick build but as usual, the women almost all have characters that can be summed up in six words or less and you have to stretch to get that far. If you want the division to go anywhere, give us some development and a reason to care about them.

Dean Ambrose pours most of a bottle of sugar into his coffee.

The bosses are talking about the women’s match when Miz comes in. He’s not happy about having to defend the Intercontinental Title against Dolph Ziggler at Backlash and thinks it’s because of what he said to Bryan a few weeks ago. Bryan says Miz can either fight Ziggler or just hand over the title right now. Miz walks away with the title intact. So much for Bryan and Miz not being on screen at the same time, which is a good thing.

The Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Non-title with Ziggler on commentary. What does it say that I knew this was going to be Crews because he’s the designated midcard jobber? Crews runs him over to start and blocks a headlock with raw power. A shot to the face puts Miz on the floor and Crews moonsaults onto him as we go to a break.

Back with Miz choking in the corner as Ziggler keeps talking about how winning and losing doesn’t matter as long as he tries his best. You know, two weeks after talking about how winning was all that mattered. No wait, it was winning the title and then defending it which mattered because that’s the story they were going with this week. Miz’s running corner clothesline has Crews in trouble but he sends Miz outside. That means it’s time to get in Dolph’s face and slap him in the jaw, only to have Miz shove Crews into him. A quick posting stuns Crews and the Skull Crushing Finale ends Apollo at 10:12.

Rating: D+. I have no idea what they’re trying for with Miz and Ziggler at this point but it seems to be YET ANOTHER attempt to make Ziggler seem important after years of failing to live up to expectations. I’ll be very, very disappointed if they put the title on him Sunday as Miz vs. Bryan still has a lot of potential as they’re trying to make Miz look like something special for a change. Ziggler would be the same nothing champion who would likely lose every non-title match but it doesn’t matter because he tried his best.

Post match Ziggler chases Miz off and has the title in front of him. Ziggler invites Miz in to get the belt but he sends Maryse in instead. See, that’s the kind of thing that shows character rather than “well golly I didn’t win the match that I said I absolutely had to win but I sure tried and that’s what matters” before saying that he has to win the big one (because winning the Intercontinental Title, a title he’s held four times already, now counts as the big one).

AJ Styles is livid about video of him getting crotched last week. He yells at the production assistant who provided the video and that’s about it.

American Alpha video.

The Usos say they still run this tag team division. The division has been around for about three weeks and they’ve already had to affirm their dominance? That’s not a good sign.

Bray Wyatt talks about men having to fight to survive. They had to learn to deal with predators, who only knew how to hunt and kill. The predator didn’t know how to create and one day they became a play thing. History repeats itself and Orton is no longer the predator he once was. Bray is the evolution of man and at Backlash, predator becomes prey.

Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch/Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss/Natalya/Carmella

Nikki makes her entrance before a break so we come back with……the other five entrances. Bliss and Naomi start things off and it’s time for the dancing kicks, which still look horrible. As a bonus this time, Naomi’s kick to the head completely misses but it’s off to Carmella (now in tights instead of the shorts in a smart move for the heel turn) vs. Becky anyway. A backslide gets two on Carmella, who didn’t seem like she kicked out in time. Nikki comes in and again the fans seem to care for reasons that I don’t understand. The villains are chased to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Becky in trouble as Natalya sends her into the apron and grabs a chinlock. Bliss comes in and grabs a chinlock of her own before Natalya hits a Michinoku Driver for two. Becky finally dives over for the hot tag to Nikki and a Disaster kick gets two on Bliss. The TKO gets two on Carmella with Bliss making the save as everything breaks down. Bliss misses her moonsault knees to the ribs and Carmella’s Code of Silence makes Nikki tap at 12:53.

Rating: D. This was bad and there’s really no way around it. Between Naomi focusing on looking athletic without having the ability to pull it off, Carmella having all of one good looking move, Bliss not being able to take a move or hit one of her own and Nikki being in the match for two minutes because they’re trying to keep her safe, there’s only so much Natalya and Becky can do. This division just does not have the depth to work right now and it’s showing more and more when there’s so little to praise in a match with the whole division.

Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Usos vs. American Alpha

We get a handshake to start but the Usos jump Alpha from behind in what feels like a heel turn. Not that it matters as Alpha comes right back and the Grand Amplitude ends Jimmy at 27 seconds.

Post match (with the replay clipping the thing) the Usos beat Alpha down by sending Jordan shoulder first into the post and superkicking Gable in the knee. Jey puts on a Tequila Sunrise and Jimmy adds a Superfly splash to Gable’s other leg for a good looking beatdown. The heel turn is a really good idea for the Usos as they’ve been the exact same team for years now. At least this gives them a little freshening up.

Orton tells a story about a dying man killing a rabbit but getting caught by a snake who wanted the rabbit for himself. The snake didn’t attack until after the man had picked up the rabbit because he knew he could have them both. At Backlash, Bray won’t know what hit him.

Here’s Fandango to say that Tyler Breeze is out finding fabric for their upcoming fashion line. Instead he’s found a woman to tango with Fandango but she’s a bit too wild for him and he throws her out. Fandango asks for anyone else so here’s Kane to chokeslam him. Fans: “GO BIG RED!” (University of Nebraska football chant).

AJ breaks a guy’s phone for not showing him enough respect.

Children with cancer awareness video.

Curt Hawkins video. He’s here next week.

Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Hype Bros vs. Heath Slater/Rhyno

The Slater Family is in the front row as Slater and Ryder start things off. Zack’s middle rope dropkick gets an early two and it’s off to Rawley to send Heath outside. Rawley runs Rhyno down and we take an early break. Back with Slater avoiding a splash in the corner but the fans want Rhyno. The hot tag brings in Ryder and Rhyno but Slater tags himself in and gets rolled up for two. Rhyno saves Heath from the Broski Boot and a Gore ends Ryder at 7:18.

Rating: D+. This was an interesting one as Rhyno was WAY over and the fans are already into Slater but Ryder and Rawley are popular enough that it’s hard to have them be heels. Either way, Slater and Rhyno were the best possible option and could get the belts, especially given Gable’s knee injury.

We look at the knee injury earlier.

Renee Young doesn’t have much of an update on Gable’s condition but the Usos come in to say they were letting out their bottled up aggression. They’ve been putting their bodies on the line for years and the fans turned on them but love American Alpha the second they saw them.

Here are Dean Ambrose and AJ Styles for a face to face meeting to end the show. Dean has a gift for AJ: a bowling trophy for participation, which is the only trophy Dean will ever give him. We see clips of AJ getting crotched last week and AJ isn’t happy. Styles talks about how he beat John Cena but Dean points out that this Sunday, AJ isn’t fighting Cena. On top of that, AJ beat Cena in a wrestling match and Sunday it’s going to be a fight. They don’t give out trophies for second place so AJ kicks Dean low and breaks the trophy to end the show. They kept this short and that’s probably best given how the feud has gone so far.

Overall Rating: C. This show was very different than usual and that’s a good thing as they head into a rather weak pay per view. There are only five matches for the show and tonight focused on the matches to crown new champions. The wrestling really wasn’t the focus here and it’s a good idea to spend this show focusing on everything other than the main event, which has gotten a lot of time already. I really don’t see a three hour pay per view based on this card but they’ve stretched stuff out in other ways before.

Results

The Miz b. Apollo Crews – Skull Crushing Finale

Alexa Bliss/Natalya/Carmella b. Nikki Bella/Naomi/Becky Lynch – Code of Silence to Bella

American Alpha b. Usos – Grand Amplitude to Jimmy

Heath Slater/Rhyno b. Hype Bros – Gore to Ryder

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: August 30, 2016
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga

Much like last night, this show has a lot of potential to be something big but instead of one big match, this show is built around a few individual issues. First and foremost, we’ll see the fallout from Miz’s awesome shoot promo on Daniel Bryan, which some people didn’t expect to see referenced on TV. There’s also more of the Tag Team Title tournament and Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin. Let’s get to it.

We open with the full Miz vs. Daniel Bryan interview from last week’s Talking Smack with Bryan calling Miz soft but Miz saying his style means he doesn’t get injured and leave for six months to a year at a time. Bryan walked off and Miz went on a tirade about how the Intercontinental Title is the most important one on Smackdown because he’s the one out there every night. This was GREAT and more emotion than Miz has ever shown, which makes me think his days as champion are numbered.

Shane tells Bryan that he can’t do that to the talent and Bryan agrees. However, Bryan finds this ironic coming from the person having issues with Brock Lesnar.

Opening sequence.

Here’s a ticked off Miz with something to say. Miz doesn’t want to hear any booing because it’s taken 148 days (the length of his title reign) to get the fans’ attention. He’s bringing prestige back to this title but people think he’s soft. Yeah he wrestles a different style but it’s because he’s smart enough to see the big picture.

What the fans don’t understand is what goes on backstage. Who do you think they call when they need someone to do a red carpet premiere or a commercial or main event Wrestlemania and then dress up as a chicken? Miz didn’t spend the first twelve years of his career wrestling in front of 50 people and people booing him for that makes them cowards. Cue Dolph Ziggler and I’m done. This was getting really interesting and it’s about Dolph “RESPECT ME WHEN I’M SERIOUS AND THEN LOSE EVERY BIG MATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN” Ziggler all over again.

Dolph says no one is going to buy what Miz says because he’s never proven a thing. If Miz wants to show how tough he is, fight right now with no referees or titles on the line. Just the two of them right now. As expected, Miz teases fighting but walks off. Ziggler says Bryan was right and calls him a soft, safe coward but that’s not enough to get him to fight either.

I actually felt the air go out of me when Ziggler came out. This story had the potential to actually be something fresh but instead it’s the same old Ziggler that we’ve seen for months and have no reason to believe it’s going to be anything different this time around. Ziggler is just a played out character and I wanted something fresh this time from Miz. Instead it’s another Battle of Cleveland because that’s what WWE thinks new and different means.

Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Hype Bros vs. Vaudevillains

The villains takes over to start and send Ryder outside for a neckbreaker on the floor. The double teaming only lasts for a few moments before the tag brings in Rawley for his splashes. A running fist in the corner sets up the Hype Ryder to pin English at 2:53. This was exactly the kind of energetic match these two needed, even though they’re likely losing in the next round.

To my shock, JBL seems to love the Hype Ryders. You would expect him to hate a team like this.

Post match the Hype Bros say they’re hyped enough to win the titles.

We finally see the tournament brackets and the Usos vs. American Alpha is actually a semifinal match. That makes things a lot more interesting.

AJ Styles runs into Apollo Crews and introduces himself as the face who runs this place.

Here’s AJ Styles for a chat. AJ, in the Cena headband, says he’s already beaten up John Cena and now he’s going to win the World Title. This brings out Apollo Crews to say Daniel Bryan has granted him a match against AJ right now. I love the fact that they just got to the point here. It was clear we were getting this match the second they ran into each other so there’s no reason to waste time setting it up.

AJ Styles vs. Apollo Crews

Crews leapfrogs AJ to start and sends it outside but Crews stops to brag about a right hand. Back with AJ holding a chinlock because that’s how you come back from breaks in WWE. Crews sends him into the corner and backdrops AJ outside for a moonsault from the apron. Back in and AJ’s high cross body is countered into a Samoan drop (that’s kind of insane) for another near fall. Not that it matters as AJ stuns him across the ropes and the Phenomenal Forearm puts Crews away at 8:15.

Rating: C+. Crews is still fun to watch but he loses a lot more often than not and really doesn’t have a character to speak of. Really all I know about him is that he’s an athletic freak and that’s not exactly enough to carry you far. It only worked so well for Shelton Benjamin and Crews isn’t that far along yet.

Earlier this week, Renee Young went to Heath Slater’s trailer and met his wife for some redneck humor. As Rhino eats cheese whiz and crackers, Slater calls not being drafted an oversight. More redneck jokes ensue and Slater talks about how he’s earned a contract several times now. When they win the titles, it’s time to upgrade to a double wide. There’s talk of the kids (outside picking up bottles and cans) but a car screeching sends the Slaters outside. Rhino just keeps calmly eating crackers. I get what they were going for here but this just isn’t my kind of humor.

Here’s Bray Wyatt with a message for Randy Orton. Bray isn’t scared of snakes or monsters because he doesn’t see Orton as anything more than a man. If Orton really hears voices, Bray hopes they’re telling him to run but here’s Randy in person. Randy says that a bunch of staples in his head aren’t going to change anything because being damaged is what he does. Bray calls himself the new predator and promises to cut the serpent’s head off at Backlash. Orton talks about Bray seeing the scars on his body but needing to worry about the scars inside. He agrees to the match and goes inside but Bray vanishes.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi

Nikki Bella is on commentary to do a commercial for Total Bellas. Naomi hurricanranas Natalya to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Naomi in trouble until a jawbreaker allows the tag off to Becky. House is cleaned and everything breaks down as Carmella comes out to brawl with Nikki. In the melee, Bliss rolls Becky up and grabs the trunks for the pin at 7:21.

Rating: D+. This division really needs some promo time. I know all of their basic characters (or what they have for characters) but I really don’t know much about most of them. Almost all of them need a chance to give us a reason to care, even if it’s just a quick promo during their entrances.

Video on the Headbangers. For the life of me I don’t get why they were picked to come back. It’s like when Greg Valentine would show up on Nitro for a one off match.

Video on Curt Hawkins.

Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Headbangers vs. Rhino/Heath Slater

Mosh and Thrasher look exactly the same as they did in 1999. Slater gets beaten down to start and the springboard clothesline puts him on the floor. Some stomping sets up a chinlock as Otunga calls the Headbangers the last two Marilyn Manson fans. The Stage Dive (powerbomb/guillotine legdrop combo) gets two as Rhino makes the save. Rhino (with what looks like some blood on the left side of his face) drags Slater over for the tag and the Gore ends Mosh at 2:53. It might be time for Thrasher to go back to training wrestlers like he did with Big Show.

A guy in a suit named Derrick Milliman has been granted a match tonight and issues an open challenge. Kane comes out for a chokeslam and leaves. Were they just running short on time or something? As Kane leaves, Baron Corbin comes out for the main event. Maybe that’s what they’re trying to set up?

Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Non-title and AJ is on commentary. Ambrose knocks Baron to the floor to start and hits a running clothesline from the apron. Back in and Dean’s bulldog is broken up and Baron pounds away with right hands. We come back from a break with Corbin holding a chinlock and getting two off a choke legsweep. Dean fights up and gets two off his clothesline before hitting the suicide dive on the floor. Back in and the Deep Six plants Dean but AJ gets in Baron’s face and tells him to stay on it. Dean knocks Baron into Styles so AJ kicks Baron in the face for the DQ at 12:12.

Rating: C. Odd ending aside, this was a nice showcase for Corbin and it’s a good sign to not have him get pinned here. It would be nice if they gave Corbin something to do other than torture Kalisto (Did that go anywhere yet?). It’s not like they’re overflowing with options at the moment and building up a big man isn’t going to hurt anything.

Post match the main eventers fight until Dean hits Corbin with Dirty Deeds. AJ gets crotched and Dean seems to sympathize before bouncing the ropes up and down. Dean takes his belt and leaves AJ sitting on the top rope to end the show. I really don’t like having AJ look silly like that, especially after he did something good earlier tonight.

Overall Rating: B-. This felt like an older episode of Smackdown but thankfully it was one where they actually got some stuff done. Nothing major was set up (save for making Bray vs. Orton official) but they did a good job of advancing a few angles and building towards the matches later on. That’s the kind of show they needed with less than two weeks before Backlash, but I’m still not sold on this being a full on three hour pay per view.

Results

Hype Bros b. Vaudevillains – Hype Ryder to English

AJ Styles b. Apollo Crews – Phenomenal Forearm

Alexa Bliss/Natalya b. Naomi/Becky Lynch – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Rhino/Heath Slater b. Headbangers – Gore to Mosh

Baron Corbin b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when AJ Styles interfered

Smackdown
Date: August 16, 2016
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Summerslam and it’s time to see what the blue show has to offer. Odds are we’ll be seeing a big build towards AJ Styles vs. John Cena II to go along with Smackdown World Champion Dean Ambrose and Dolph Ziggler as guests on MizTV. We’ll also have another chance to see Eva Marie’s in ring debut. Let’s get to it.

Randy Orton signs his contract vs. Brock Lesnar but warns the bosses that the match might be short because it only takes one RKO. Heath Slater brings in a fruit basket but Bryan sees the card: “To Bob, my condolences.” Slater can’t believed that he’s not being offered a contract so Orton eats an apple and says he has an idea. A secret alliance with Carlito?

Opening sequence.

We open with MizTV but Dean cuts off Miz’s intro. Ziggler cuts off Dean’s opening statement though and they go nose to nose. Miz talks about how this is a huge fight for the title at Summerslam and even he thought Ziggler was a write off. He was a flop like WWE’s version of the Ghostbuster’s reboot. Again, I’d like to point out: a two time World Champion and a four time Intercontinental Champion should never be considered a flop. All Dolph cares about is winning the title on Sunday.

Miz gets cut off again as Ziggler says all he wants to do is kick Ambrose’s head off (of his face that is but I think I get what Dolph meant). Ziggler wants to hear Dean say he was the final push Dolph needed to get over the top. That earns a chuckle from Dean, who says the title isn’t the goal. Winning the belt is just the start because that’s the day the pressure really starts. Everyone knows Dolph can’t handle pressure which is why he’s never grabbed the ball and scored a touchdown. HE’S A TWO TIME WORLD CHAMPION AND HE WON IT THE SAME WAY DEAN DID!

Ziggler gets serious and says Dean is going to have to give everything he has but it’s not going to be enough to put Dolph away. As Dean is reaching down deep and looking for one last move BAM! Dolph lays him out with a superkick in mid sentence and says this Sunday, Dean will realize that he’s that good. Ziggler’s stuff was much better but this idea that Ziggler has never won the big one is ridiculous, especially coming from Ambrose. Or are they just burying the legacy of the World Heavyweight Championship and saying it doesn’t mean a thing anymore?

During the break, Miz insulted Apollo Crews by calling him Apollo Creed, only to have Crews come out and beat Miz down. I had almost forgotten about that match so it’s nice to get a quick something.

American Alpha/Usos/Hype Bros vs. Ascension/Vaudevillains/Breezango

Viktor and Gable start things off but Mojo tags himself in for a three point tackle. Konnor saves his partner from the Hype Rider and everything breaks down to take us to a break. Back with Ryder and Konnor reaching for tags as it’s off to Jimmy vs. English. Jordan starts throwing suplexes and it’s time for the parade of finishers, including a ridiculous four superkicks. Jimmy dives on most of his opponents, leaving English to take Grand Amplitude for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: D+. Well that accomplished a grand total of nothing. Wow the Usos can throw superkicks and hit dives and American Alpha is awesome. I feel so much more confident about this new division than I did coming in when I thought the division had no depth and was basically American Alpha and a bunch of nothing teams. That’s really not enough to warrant a title but I’m sure WWE would disagree.

Naomi vs. Eva Marie

Naomi’s full outfit now lights up, including her hair, and she has a backpack full of glow in the dark material to throw to the crowd. It’s certainly eye catching if nothing else. And Eva isn’t here due to traffic issues so no match again. This is becoming the highlight of the show.

AJ Styles can’t wait to see Alberto Del Rio beat up John Cena tonight but Del Rio tells him to stop living in the past.

Curt Hawkins is coming. Uh….yay.

Heath Slater vs. Randy Orton

So I guess just facing Lesnar last night doesn’t count for some reason. Slater can barely walk so Orton easily takes over by hitting him in almost every body part. Orton keeps hammering away in the corner…..and that’s a DQ at 1:00.

Orton destroys him post match and doesn’t seem to notice that he lost. The elevated DDT onto the floor sets up some German suplexes and Brock’s pose. An RKO leaves Slater out cold.

The Wyatts are here.

The bosses give Slater a contract so Heath brags about how he showed no mercy. Bryan thinks that’s a great name for a pay per view but Slater thinks Bryan is Mick Foley and a bigger star than Roman Reigns. Oh and Shane is Stephanie. That’s enough for the boss and Shane takes the contract away but Slater keeps reading the bed he’s laying on. No signing.

Erick Rowan vs. Dean Ambrose

Non-title and the Wyatts came out during the break. Of note: Bray and Randy had a staredown as Orton was leaving. Dean tries Dirty Deeds thirty seconds in but settles with a dropkick to send Rowan outside for a suicide dive. Back in and Rowan takes over with a powerslam before sending Dean into the steps. Rowan slowly stomps and pounds in the corner, only to have Dean suplex him back down.

Mauro: “WWE Champion Dean Ambrose willing to put it all on the line!” Other than the title in this match that is. Erick kicks him in the face as JBL talks about opponents not expecting Dean to drop an elbow while they’re standing up. You don’t expect him to do something he does in almost every match? Speaking of which, Dean hits Dirty Deeds for the pin at 4:58.

Rating: D+. That’s the match you would expect from these two as Erick showed off his power but Dean did his normal stuff while JBL said stuff that doesn’t make sense. I like the idea of having Dean fight midcarders though as it allows him to look good and the person he beats doesn’t look bad because they lost to the champ. Everything works fine.

Post match Bray looks at Rowan’s mask and walks away. Good.

Becky Lynch/Carmella vs. Alexa Bliss/Natalya

Carmella and Natalya start things off with a headscissors sending Natalya flying. We hear about Daniel Bryan making a new Women’s Title despite there being a total of five female wrestlers on the roster (I’m waiting on Eva to actually wrestle to count her and get it all the way up to six.). Natalya takes Carmella down and the heels take over until a diving tag brings in Becky. Everything breaks down and Natalya collides with Becky…..as Eva Marie comes out to her full entrance. This brings out Naomi for a chase to distract Natalya, setting up the Disarm-Her for the tap out at 4:15.

Rating: D. I probably shouldn’t have rated it due to how long the match spent on Eva’s entrance but it lets me talk about how stupid it is to have a title for this division. The entire division was involved in one match and you have a total of one former title holder in the whole thing. Becky has never won anything, Carmella and Alexa are rookies, Natalya is the same thing she was the day she debuted, Naomi is flashy but nothing great in the ring and Eva is a comedy act.

That gives you Becky, Natalya and Naomi to do the lifting until Bayley can come and make it four women of worth in the division, at least until Alexa and Carmella are more ready. Remember when all the women were in the ring the night after Wrestlemania and it looked like something might come of it? Yeah forget all that because having enough for one great division means it’s time to split it into two weak divisions.

Baron Corbin attacks Kalisto again. What did Kalisto do to deserve this kind of demotion?

Long video on Orton vs. Lesnar, which we saw a few weeks ago.

Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena

AJ is on commentary. Feeling out process to start until a hiptoss sends Del Rio outside and he takes a breather in the crowd. Back from an early break with Del Rio hitting a shot off the top but missing a charge to crash out onto the floor. Del Rio kicks him in the face (kind of) and avoids a charge to send Cena into the buckle.

AJ and Otunga keep arguing over respect with Styles calling him a rookie. Since this is a Del Rio match and you can guess what he’s doing, I have the chance to flash back to Otunga being Styles’ replacement at an autograph booth at this year’s Axxess. I’ve never seen a line clear out so fast in my life. Alberto hits a DDT for two and we take another break.

Back with Del Rio diving into a dropkick as Cena starts his comeback. The Backstabber cuts him off and gives Alberto two, followed by the corner enziguri for the same. Cena reverses the cross armbreaker into the STF but Del Rio is too close to the ropes. The low superkick sets up the cross armbreaker but Cena escapes with a powerbomb. A quick AA gives Cena the pin at 16:56.

Rating: C+. Really if you’ve seen these two fight once, you’ve seen almost every one of their matches. Del Rio isn’t going to beat Cena in a regular match (certainly not at this point in his career) and it gets a little more boring every time these two fight. Del Rio is just so dull like this and it’s so boring watching him clearly not care.

AJ runs in for a Phenomenal Forearm. Styles says he’s tired of hearing that the future goes through Cena and he’s going to be the new face that runs this place. He goes to leave but comes back for more, allowing Cena to hit the AA. Cena isn’t done though and hits a big AA through the table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had some moments but it never took off and a lot of that is due to a lack of a really compelling feud. AJ vs. Cena feels like the World Title feud while Ambrose and Ziggler are continuing to fight over who is the best wrestler from Ohio. I still can’t buy into the idea that Ziggler has never won a big match when he did the exact same thing Ambrose did. If so, what does that make Dean? Throw in the tag and women’s divisions that can fit into a single match and it’s hard to find a reason to get excited about this show.

Results

American Alpha/Usos/Hype Bros b. Ascension/Vaudevillains/Breezango – Grand Amplitude to English

Heath Slater b. Randy Orton via DQ when Orton kept attacking in the corner

Dean Ambrose b. Erick Rowan – Dirty Deeds

Carmella/Becky Lynch b. Natalya/Alexa Bliss – Disarm-Her to Natalya

John Cena b. Alberto Del Rio – Attitude Adjustment

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s WWE Grab Bag at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IH7O904

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: April 21, 2016
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s the last show on the UK tour and we’re in the same building we were in on Monday for Raw. These shows can range from nothing special to more interesting than usual but Smackdown tends to be just your run of the mill show. We’re getting closer to Payback though and the card is looking stacked. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of AJ vs. Roman on Monday, including Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson beating Reigns down.

It’s time for MizTV with Maryse handling the introduction before Miz brings out guest AJ Styles. Miz gets right to the point of asking about AJ being tight with Gallows and Anderson in New Japan, to the point that he knows them better than anyone else. Styles denies being behind the attack but he never told them NOT to attack Reigns. Miz continues being awesome at needling as AJ eventually gets annoyed at him for asking about Gallows and Anderson over and over again.

The fact of the matter is that AJ doesn’t need them to beat Reigns but Miz thinks that being a better “rassler” isn’t going to get it done because Roman Reigns is the guy. Miz says he can handle the truth from AJ but Maryse tells him to go Will Smith. This leads to a rather romantic moment which disgusts AJ so badly that he backfists Miz in the face.

AJ vs. Miz is set for later.

Ryback vs. Kalisto

Non-title for no apparent reason other than Kalisto loses here because the title is back to meaning nothing. Ryback runs him over in the corner and the GOLDBERG chants begin for reasons of general annoyance. Kalisto’s kicks have little effect as Ryback gorilla presses him down and sends him shoulder first into the post as we take a break. Back with Ryback doing his delayed superplex for a delayed two count.

Ryback puts him in the Tree of Woe for kicks to the ribs, only to miss a charge and go shoulder first into the post. Kalisto’s kicks to the chest and corkscrew cross body stagger Ryback and the hurricanrana driver gets two. Ryback hits a quick Meathook but the Shell Shock is countered into a DDT for two more. The Salida Del Sol is countered into the Shell Shock to give Ryback the pin at 9:42.

Rating: C-. It’s clear that WWE wants to put the title on Ryback and I have no idea why they just don’t do it at this point. Kalisto means nothing as champion at this point as he won the belt and then did nothing with it ever since (as is so often the case) so just give it to Ryback who could be a decent monster for someone to slay later on. First though, we get a rubber match because that’s how the midcard titles roll around here.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin

Never mind as Corbin jumps Ziggler during the entrance and beats him down on the floor as has become his custom.

The Miz vs. AJ Styles

Non-title again. Miz gets clotheslined down to start and AJ goes old school with a Muta Lock (bridging Indian deathlock with a chinlock) but Miz gets his head out and rolls to the floor. Back in and AJ gets caught with some knees to the back, only to hit a quick dropkick (Lawler: “That was a miso soup dropkick wasn’t it?”). A spinwheel kick drops Miz again so he hides behind Maryse, allowing him to get in a left hand to drop AJ.

Styles gets sent into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Miz stomping away in the corner and hitting that running clothesline. We hit the chinlock (because of course) but AJ jawbreaks his way to freedom. A big boot drops Styles again (Miz can throw a nice boot) but it’s a double cross body to put both of them down. AJ is up first though and gets in the running seated forearm for two. Miz starts going after the knee before a DDT gets two more.

The Skull Crushing Finale is countered into the fireman’s carry backbreaker onto the knee (which Lawler pronounces correctly for once) for another near fall but AJ dives into an atomic drop. We hit the Figure Four for a bit until AJ turns it over with Ranallo doing a great job of putting over AJ as someone who will never quit.

The Calf Crusher goes on out of nowhere but Miz is too close to the ropes. Styles hit the Pele and that’s enough for Miz who tries to walk, only to run into Gallows and Anderson. Miz makes the mistake of turning around and it’s a slingshot forearm to set up the Phenomenal version for the pin on Miz at 17:55.

Rating: B. I know I’m in the minority but I’ve been a big Miz fan for a long time now. No he’s not going to get back to the main event or anything but he’s more than capable of having a strong performance against someone who can walk him through a match. They’re doing a really good job of setting AJ up as someone who could shock the world at Payback. That’s an impressive feat, especially if they go somewhere else with this Bullet Club story after the pay per view. Oh and well done on having both midcard champions lose clean in less than an hour and a half.

We look at the end of Raw with Jericho and Owens taking out Zayn and Ambrose.

Ambrose and Zayn are ready for Owens and Jericho in tonight’s main event. Spotted dick is referenced but they can’t decide on a cool team name.

In what might be a dark segment that won’t air on the TV show, Miz and Maryse are still in the ring after the match. Miz says he knew Gallows and Anderson were with AJ but that just showed he was right. Tonight there was an injustice and he demands an investigation on this match right here and right now. Miz doesn’t care how long it takes because he wants someone to come out here.

Cue Shane McMahon to say what’s up London. That’s not cool with Miz because he should be a priority to everyone on any show. He pokes Shane a bit and that’s not cool with the red show boss. Miz pokes him a few more times so Shane punches him in the face and drops him with the back elbow to the jaw before clotheslining him out to the floor. Again, not likely to make the show but a cool thing for the crowd.

Post break, Gallows and Anderson say they’re here to make an impact and aren’t here with Styles. They’ll debut on Monday against the Usos.

Paige/Natalya vs. Naomi/Tamina

Tamina and Natalya get things going but it’s quickly off to Naomi for her stupid wiggling headscissors without any actual damage being done to Natalya. Seriously, the Divas era is done so stop that nonsense. Paige comes in to help with a double wishbone before it’s already back to Natalya because Paige being in the ring in front of her home crowd would be a waste of time.

Naomi drops Natalya again and shouts that Natalya wants to wrestle. Well kind of yeah. We hit the chinlock from Tamina for a bit before Natalya easily gets over for the tag off to Paige. Naomi gets sent into the buckle and the Rampaige gets one with Tamina making the save. Natalya comes back in and it’s a Sharpshooter to Tamina while Paige gets Naomi to tap to the PTO at 5:33.

Rating: D+. I like that double submission ending as you let Natalya look good while Paige gets to win in front of her home country. It’s really tiring to see her lose all the time but with the way the division has been realigned, maybe she has to be moved down to the lower levels. I’m still a fan of hers but she’s really not up to the top level at this point.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

Goldust is guest referee and this is fallout from Goldust teaming with Fandango instead of Truth last week. They trade knockdowns and trade hip swivels. More dancing ensues with Goldust joining in until Truth lays Fandango out with the Lie Detector for the pin at 1:53. I have no idea where they’re going with this but if they could get to the point already, it would be most appreciated.

Goldust and Truth dance post match with Goldust looking terrified at the thought of trying the splits.

Here are Enzo Amore and Colin Cassady for a chat about the tag team tournament final. Enzo gets through the opening spiel before the Vaudevillains cut him off. English thinks Enzo has mange so Enzo thinks the Vaudevillains are a couple of haters. Apparently the G stands for gentlemen so Enzo is going to be honest with him. That thing English said about him having rodent mange……well Enzo really doesn’t know what it means.

Gotch insults Enzo’s rhyming (hater) and English says that it’s going to take two real men to show what a real era should be like. After they win the tournament, Simon promises to use proper pronunciation and ask “how are you doing”. Cass thinks that’s SAWFT. This was a really good exchange and a much better introduction to the Vaudevillains than we’ve seen so far.

Greeting From Puerto Rico.

Dean Ambrose/Sami Zayn vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Jericho and Zayn get things going with Sami doing that reverse leapfrog and armdragging Chris down into an armbar. Dean comes in and has to spin out of a Walls attempt but can’t get Dirty Deeds as we head to a break. Back with Owens elbowing Ambrose in the head and slowly hammering away. Jericho can’t keep Dean in the corner though and it’s off to Sami for the high cross body and a near fall.

Sami loads up the corner climbing wristdrag but opts to dive onto Owens instead. Makes sense. That’s fine with Owens as he pulls Sami outside and pounds away as Dean has been down WAY longer than he should have after a beating. It’s back to Jericho for a chinlock followed by a Lionsault for a very calm near fall. The Blue Thunder Bomb doesn’t even warrant a cover here but it’s a double tag to Ambrose and Owens with the latter running into a boot in the corner.

Dean hits the suicide dive through the ropes but Owens gets in a superkick for two. The fans are having some issues getting into this one even though it’s certainly not bad. A quick Dirty Deeds and the Helluva kick have the heels in trouble but Dean goes up instead of covering, allowing Jericho to crotch him on the ropes, giving Owens a quick pin at 12:53.

Rating: C. Totally standard Smackdown main event tag match and while that’s fine, it’s certainly nothing you need to see. I like the idea of putting two feuds into one match but they’re out of combinations to do before the pay per view, which is a common problem WWE runs into. Ambrose getting pinned via cheating is a good idea as well.

Owens is very pleased with the win to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was stronger tonight but my goodness some of the booking decisions made my head hurt. As usual the midcard titles mean nothing because they’re just midcard titles and a way to make people look good by beating midcard champions. It’s so backwards compared to the way things used to go and went for years that it makes no sense but I’m sure WWE can explain it better to you than I could. They speak crazy like that you see.

Results

Ryback b. Kalisto – Shell Shock

AJ Styles b. The Miz – Phenomenal Forearm

Paige/Natalya b. Naomi/Tamina – PTO to Naomi

R-Truth b. Fandango – Lie Detector

Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho b. Sami Zayn/Dean Ambrose – Owens pinned Ambrose after Jericho crotched him

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Yeah this is something that is happening too.

Let’s get this one out of the way. Simply put, people don’t care about this stuff and there’s no real reason to. Most of these women either aren’t any good or they aren’t interesting enough to mean anything on the main roster. As is the case with any big cluster of a match like this, no one is going to get any time and it’s probably going to be about getting Eva over because that’s a thing that still exists.

I’ll take the Total Divas to win because that’s a thing that still exists as well. No one is going to get to show off much of anything here, but it’s a good sign that we seem to be getting an unofficial brand split in the women’s division. You have the title match with with actual wrestling and then the Divas doing this nonsense. I have little desire to watch this match, though to be fair I said the same thing about the fourteen Divas mess two years ago and that turned out to be somewhat fun. Nothing to see here though and everyone knows why this is happening.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 7, 2016
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

Now this could be interesting as the company is hardly on a creative roll at the moment and we’re in one of the biggest smark havens in the world. We’re also five days away from Roadblock which suddenly has the potential to change the entire Wrestlemania card with less than a month before the biggest show of the year. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Vince vowing to renounce Shane as his son after Wrestlemania. I still have no idea why this is supposed to be interesting or a major plot point as the McMahons are always arguing.

Here’s Shane to get things going. Shane sucks up to the Chicago crowd and it’s clear that they’re excited to see him. He was watching Raw last week and heard what Undertaker was saying about his match. Shane respects Undertaker completely but he wasn’t surprised by what Vine said about him after the fact. Vince has lost touch with both his reality and his grandsons but Shane is ready to stop it all. At Wrestlemania, he stops all the backstage politics and all the authority. Shane is tired of seeing all the talent being held back with no breaks and all the breaks given to people with no talent.

The gong goes off but it’s a strutting Vince instead. Vince laughs at the fans for not being happy to see him so the CM PUNK chants start up. The boss lets it die off and talks about how Stephanie is getting everything. Earlier today Vince was looking at a picture of Shane at his first wrestling show and of course we get to see it on the screen. Vince pulls the actual photo from somewhere and crushes the frame like he’ll do at Wrestlemania.

After Shane loses, Vince will be able to wrap his arms around his grandsons and prove to them that their family isn’t a bunch of losers because his greatest creation is going to destroy his greatest failure. Vince sends out the security but Shane actually beats them up to a HUGE ovation, most of which isn’t deserved.

The segment was better than most of anything we saw last week but I’m still really not sure what the heck they’re fighting about. Thankfully they’ve seemed to drop the whole lockbox concept which wasn’t working to say the least but Shane having a proxy would work better as an idea.

Kevin Owens vs. Neville

Non-title so look for another upset. Owens drives him into the corner to start and stomps away, meaning he survives longer than he did against Neville a few weeks back. Kevin: “Come on mate!” Neville comes back with kicks to send Owens to the floor but misses a dive, allowing Kevin to send him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Neville fighting out of a chinlock, only to be flipped over with a German suplex.

The Cannonball is countered with a nice enziguri to knock Owens to the floor, setting up a great looking shooting star off the top to the outside. The fans REALLY like that one but don’t care as much for the standing shooting star press for two back inside. Neville charges into a boot to the face but rolls away from a springboard moonsault. A superkick sets up the middle rope Phoenix Splash for a very, very close two. Thankfully Neville stays on him but Owens grabs a rollup with the trunks for the pin at 10:25.

Rating: C+. Those high spots from Neville helped carry this, leading us to the more important ending of Owens winning. The cheating helps but I was worried that they would job him AGAIN here to set up something at Wrestlemania. It’s also nice to see Neville getting some prominent spots instead of just in a nothing six man tag.

Post match Owens loads up the apron powerbomb but SAMI ZAYN runs in and cleans house, likely setting up a big Intercontinental Title match at Wrestlemania.

Video from the Rock saying Wrestlemania is free for new WWE Network subscribers.

Long recap of HHH and Ambrose from last week.

Dolph Ziggler and Zack Ryder (with a beard) are in the back when Stephanie comes up. Stephanie thanks Ziggler for taking down a tweet about the Authority earlier today but Dolph mentions taking down the Authority a few years back. Stephanie doesn’t remember that and reminds Ziggler that she’s his boss. As if we could forget as that’s pretty much her whole character. Stephanie likes these flashbacks and gives Ziggler an elimination tag against three members of the League of Nations. Oh and Ziggler won’t have any partners.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Total Divas match, meaning we get a clip from tomorrow’s show with Nikki telling Brie how to live. Summer takes her down to start but Brie comes right back with the YES Kicks and a horrible looking BRIE MODE knee. Brie misses a middle rope cross body but here’s Lana for a distraction, allowing Summer to grab a rollup for the pin at 2:05. They haven’t used that finish as much lately so it’s not as annoying here.

Post match Lana comes to the ring and gives Brie a Bella Buster for some of her first ever physicality.

Here’s Dean Ambrose to open the second hour. He gets right to the point: this Saturday he’s hijacking the car on the road to Wrestlemania by being HHH to win the title. Dean talks about all the things he’s going to get to do like being on the cover of People Magazine and throwing out the first pitch at baseball games.

After Wrestlemania, HHH is going to have to buy Dean a new suit and lapel pins….which he doesn’t know how to work. Actually Dean isn’t going to do any of these things that come along with being WWE Champion but he loves the idea of being WWE Champion and getting to come out here and fight everyone every single night.

Cue HHH who threatens to beat Ambrose up again. Dean says he’ll take another trip to the announcers’ table and hold that WWE Championship up high. Dean: “When I do that, you can suck it.” HHH calls Roadblock a clever name that marketing came up with because Dean is at best a speed bump or a pothole. Dean wants to fight right now but HHH fights on his own time. As for tonight, Dean gets to face Bray Wyatt. That gives him a preview of Sunday where he learns that the Authority always wins.

Dolph Ziggler vs. League of Nations

Elimination rules with Del Rio as the odd man out. Barrett gets things going with the King pounding away and getting two off the Winds of Change. The knees in the ropes (which are similar to the ones Shane threw earlier tonight) set up the ten forearms from Sheamus, even though Ziggler started to fall down in the ropes. Rusev comes in for a running splash against the ropes for two. At least he isn’t talking about how much he loves Summer or Lana at the time as that feud (which wasn’t as bad as people made it out to be) is best forgotten.

A surprisingly good dropkick gets two for Rusev and it’s back to Barrett for some forearms to the back in the corner. Sheamus comes in and slowly stomps away, followed by the knee to the ribs. Barrett charges into the running DDT and goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a superkick for the first elimination. Sheamus takes a superkick as well but Rusev breaks it up. The Brogue Kick misses but Rusev kicks Ziggler in the head, setting up the Brogue for the pin 6:39.

Rating: C-. This could have been much worse as I can live with Ziggler getting one pin, especially since the League didn’t have to make an immediate save given how the rules were set up. The League is good as the enforcers for the Authority and roles like this but I’m not sure how much longer they can survive given how they’ve been treated lately.

We look back at Shane and Vince from earlier.

Video on Shane McMahon’s in-ring career.

Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks bicker about who would have won last week.

Naomi/Tamina vs. Becky Lynch/Sasha Banks

Can’t they bring up Blue Pants and Deonna Purrazzo instead of making us watch these four again? Charlotte and Ric are at ringside because Flair needs a paycheck this badly. Cole talks about how we’ve seen this match before. At least they’re just acknowledging that their matches are repetitive now. Becky gets thrown into the heel corner to start and a right hand puts her down again. Tamina misses a charge in the corner and it’s off to Sasha as everything breaks down. The Bank Statement (Cole: “THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO MCGREGGOR!”) puts Tamina away at 2:00.

Post match Charlotte comes in and beats down the winners.

R-Truth is delivering a pizza to Goldust (who thankfully was just right there when Truth came in) and asks to be his partner again. Goldust says a good partner would know that he was lactose intolerant and slams the pizza down. Mark Henry comes up and takes the pizza.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Chris Jericho

New Day is defending. Before the match, Big E. wants to talk about the matching tattoos they’ve gotten but apparently only he got the blue and purple unicorn. Of course Big E. was just joking until Jericho cuts him off and saves some face. Jericho and Styles now have Y2AJ shirts. Kofi gets sent to the floor to start and the challengers hit a nice double plancha to take us to an early break.

Back with Jericho in trouble but nailing a dropkick to Big E. An enziguri drops Kingston and there’s the hot tag to AJ. The moonsault reverse DDT hits as close to seamlessly as I’ve ever seen but AJ springboards into the Midnight Hour for two as Chris saves. The Lionsault crushes Kofi and AJ adds the springboard 450 for two with Big E. pulling Kingston to the floor. AJ drops Big E. with a slingshot forearm but misses the backfist to Kofi.

Back to Jericho who counters Trouble in Paradise into the Walls. AJ stops Woods from making the save but gets driven hard into the barricade. Big E. gets back up for the tag so Jericho tries the Walls on him, which doesn’t quite work. Instead Jericho sends Big E. into the post but the Codebreaker is countered into the Big Ending for the clean pin to retain at 11:38.

Rating: B+. They had me a few times in this one and the action after the hot tag to AJ never really stopped. This was more of a showcase for AJ than anything else with the springboards looking as smooth as they have yet in WWE. Jericho getting pinned clean opens up a few doors but I’m not sure where New Day goes at Wrestlemania, unless Bullet Club gets a very fast callup. AJ and Jericho could go various places as well.

Post match AJ and Jericho get an ovation but Jericho turns heel with a Codebreaker to Styles. That might have worked better if Jericho hadn’t just lost clean but at least we get a FOURTH match between these two. I mean, just a thought but maybe you shouldn’t do a (potential) Wrestlemania match three times before Wrestlemania. Jericho gives him two more Codebreakers for good measure before stuffing the Y2AJ shirt in AJ’s mouth.

Back from a break with Jericho complaining about the fans chanting for AJ. They can enjoy it while they can because they won’t be chanting for AJ Styles anymore.

Tyler Breeze vs. Kalisto

Non-title. Breeze blasts him in the face to start as the announcers talk about Jericho. A chinlock doesn’t go very far and it’s the corkscrew cross body into the Salida Del Sol for the pin on Breeze at 2:17.

Big Boss Man Hall of Fame announcement. I’m so happy over this one.

Kalisto is in the back and talks about idolizing people like Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero at Wrestlemania. Cue Ryback to ask why he doesn’t have a Wrestlemania match yet. Kalisto might be one of the best pound for pound wrestlers in WWE today but that’s not what we’re talking about here. Ryback says Kalisto has a mask just like a superhero but that’s not how things work in the real world. Kalisto needs to be the US Champion on his own instead of as one half of the Lucha Dragons. Watch him do this on his own tonight. No match was made here and it felt more like a way to split up the Dragons (thank goodness).

Here are the Social Outcasts to talk about how sad it is that Ryback doesn’t want to be part of a team. He can’t play team dodgeball (like on Heath Slater’s new show Game Night on WWE.com) or be a Ghostbuster, but above all that he can’t be a Social Outcast. Tonight the Axeman cometh, which means they all start making strange noises and chopping the air with their hand.

Ryback vs. Curtis Axel

This is joined in progress after a break (because reasons) with Axel getting in his jobber offense until the Thesz press allows Ryback to slam Axel head first into the mat. A CM Punk style running knee in the corner (complete with a Go To Sleep motion) sends Axel to the floor but an Outcasts distraction lets Axel get in a cheap shot for two. Just like last week, Ryback pounds him down into near unconsciousness, setting up the Shell Shock for the pin at 2:08. Again, no reason for this to go to a break before the match.

We recap the opening again.

Stephanie comes in to see Vince and asks what happens if Shane wins.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray still has nothing to do at Wrestlemania but he does talk about conquering the conqueror this Saturday. Tonight he’ll use Dean as an example. No Family with Bray this week. Some early elbows put Bray in trouble and Dean cranks on both legs at the same time. Dean drives in even more elbows to Bray’s head in the corner until Bray runs him over with the cross body as we take a break.

Back with Bray suplexing Dean to keep control before taking him outside for a double clothesline. They get back in with Dean hammering away and trying the rebound lariat, only to have Bray take Dean’s head off because he’s smart enough to figure out that Dean is doing the exact same thing he always does. Dean knocks him out to the floor but the suicide dive is countered into Sister Abigail. That’s countered as well so Bray Rock Bottoms him onto the barricade. Back in again and Dean scores with the rebound lariat followed by the top rope elbow, only to have the Wyatts come in for the DQ at 11:50.

Rating: C+. I was digging this one until the ending that you kind of had to know was coming. At least they didn’t have either of them doing a clean job here as I was kind of expecting them to. Bray countering the rebound lariat was a nice touch too because wrestlers being smart is always cool to see. Good main event though it’s more of a storytelling device than anything else.

Post match the Wyatts destroy Dean until HHH comes out. Bray stares at HHH and even touches the title (fans: “YES!”) before the Family leaves. HHH loads up the announcers’ table but walks into Dirty Deeds. Dean holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. While still not a very good show, this was WAY better than what they did last week. It’s amazing how much better a show is when you have anything besides Stephanie reminding us (AGAIN) that she’s the most amazing thing since that time Randy Savage woke up Hulk Hogan with a top rope elbow because Hogan only Hulked Up from finishers. The problem here though is that this Wrestlemania really isn’t very strong and there’s only so much they can do to build that up, especially with the lack of people actually appearing.

I can’t imagine anything big happens at Roadblock but maybe they’ll throw in a big (and possibly much needed) curve ball. That being said, the idea of Reigns not appearing until Wrestlemania (as Raw is in Pittsburgh, Philadelphia and Brooklyn before then) might not be out of the question either. It really is a weird build to Wrestlemania and I’m not sure what’s going to happen before we get there. In this case though, I’m not liking that feeling.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Neville – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Summer Rae b. Brie Bella – Rollup

League of Nations b. Dolph Ziggler – Brogue Kick

Becky Lynch/Sasha Banks b. Tamina/Naomi – Bank Statement to Tamina

New Day b. Chris Jericho/AJ Styles – Big Ending to Jericho

Kalisto b. Tyler Breeze – Salida Del Sol

Ryback b. Curtis Axel – Shell Shock

Dean Ambrose b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 29, 2016
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the first Raw ever on February 29 and the big story would seem to be Undertaker showing up to address his match with Shane McMahon. Other than that we should get more between HHH and Roman Reigns, assuming Reigns is back from his nose injury at HHH’s hands last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of HHH beating Reigns down last week to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Here’s HHH to get things going. HHH talks about how only a handful of us actually have any authority and the rest of us all have an authority figure in their lives. Every single one of us hate it (much like opening Raw with a long promo that isn’t likely to lead anywhere) and want to fight back but we’re all afraid. That fear keeps everything in line but people like Reigns decided to not listen to that fear.

Now Reigns is sitting at home breathing through his mouth and hoping he can still go to Wrestlemania. Cue Ambrose to a nice reaction from the fans as things slow down. Dean just got off the phone with Reigns, who says hi but he’s also coming for HHH. They make some Oscar references to recap Ambrose challenging Lesnar last week and Shane having to fight Undertaker at Wrestlemania.

Ambrose asks who HHH wanted to win the match at Fastlane but the champ brushes it off by saying Dean wasn’t a factor in that match. Dean gets right in HHH’s face and says he’s the last person HHH wants to face at Wrestlemania. The boss finally gets that Dean really is crazy but Ambrose can see it in him: HHH is scared.

HHH thinks that’s the smell of clean clothes and power that Dean isn’t familiar with, which draws a YOU CAN’T BEAT HIM chant. Dean gets right to the point and asks for a title shot but HHH says that shouting RIGHT NOW doesn’t earn you a title shot. He’ll give Dean an answer at the end of the night (with Dean clarifying that HHH means by the end of the show) but first of all, Dean has to fight Alberto Del Rio.

Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

The winner gets Charlotte (at ringside with Ric Flair) for the title at Wrestlemania. Just get to the double pin now. They start fast with some pinfall reversal sequences and get some near falls each. Neither submission works and we’ve got a stalemate as both of them are trying for their Wrestlemania moment. Not the title or anything, but a Wrestlemania moment.

Becky is sent outside and taken down with a baseball slide, allowing Sasha to send her into the post as we take a break. Back with Sasha driving two knees into Becky’s chest for another near fall as JBL keeps up the line of it all being about going to Wrestlemania. Becky grabs an exploder suplex and stops a charge with a boot to the face. A missile dropkick gets two for Lynch but Sasha is up first and heads up top. Becky is right there though and tries a superplex, only to get countered into a sunset flip. Sasha lays back for no apparent reason and it’s a double pin at 9:54.

Rating: C+. This was much more like the NXT format for a women’s match and it was better as a result. Instead of having them sit around and do chinlocks for three minutes, these two were actually telling a story and making things work far better. The ending was predictable but I’d rather have all three of them in the match instead of just Sasha.

We don’t have a winner and Charlotte is happy.

The Wyatts come on screen with Bray talking about insanity meaning to try something more than once and expecting different results. Well maybe he’s insane then because he wants to save us all. He had an idea which is turning into a plan and can be used to save us all. Run.

Dolph Ziggler vs. The Miz

This is over an argument on the pre-show last week over Ziggler asking what Miz has done lately. Let me repeat that. DOLPH ZIGGLER is asking what someone has done lately. Ziggler starts punching away in the corner but gets whipped hard into the corner to set up a rollup…..for the pin at 1:05. Well that’s surprising. Nice but surprising.

Long recap of last week’s opening segment with Shane McMahon returning.

Here’s Stephanie for her acceptance speech for the Vincent J. McMahon Award. We get some classic heel tactics as she asks for the respect that she deserves during her speech. The fans chant for Shane but apparently he’s not here tonight, just like he won’t be here after Wrestlemania. Stephanie holds the trophy like a baby and talks about all the sacrifices she makes, only to be greeted with more WE WANT SHANE chants.

She turns the podium over and goes on a rant about how horrible Shane is and what it means that people cheer for him. Stephanie goes on about how Shane has been gone for years, which proves how little he cares about this whole place. This is a speech you could have said about the Rock before he returned in 2011 with some of the exact same lines.

Apparently it eats Shane alive that Stephanie and Hunter are married and that she has so much power. Shane’s kids can be in charge later on but they’ll have to fight to earn that power. She hits the screeching voice and talks about how we all need to show her respect and bow down to the queen before leaving. To recap: no Shane, no interruption and no one getting anything in on Stephanie as she hypes up…..herself. Oh yeah everything is normal again.

Lucha Dragons vs. Rusev/Sheamus

Of course this is still going. JBL: “The League is like the Four Horsemen. They just need a JJ Dillon.” Cara sunset flips Sheamus for two to start but charges into an Irish Curse. Rusev comes in to crush Cara’s head before Sheamus comes back in for an armbar. I’m not sure on having a power guy like Sheamus using an arm hold. That doesn’t feel right.

Cara comes back with a tornado DDT and the hot tag brings in Kalisto to clean house with his bouncing offense. The hurricanrana driver (minus most of the drive) gets two on Rusev and Cara dives onto Barrett. That earns Cara a Brogue Kick though and Kalisto takes Sheamus down with a flip dive. Back in and Rusev kicks Kalisto in the head for the pin at 5:05.

Rating: D+. You can’t make this stuff up. I mean, as soon as the Dragons came out you knew Kalisto was going to take the pin if his team lost because we need to protect SIN CARA for some reason. I’m really not sure what we’re going with the League as they’re just floating, so yeah of course let one of them pin the US Champion.

Del Rio gives Kalisto the top rope double stomp post match.

Immediately after the match, Cole: “Of course Total Divas airs every Tuesday night on E!” I’m glad they’re not even bothering to hide the fact that the show is more important than the US Title.

Renee Young and Natalya do a commercial for Subway. Eh it’s a big check for WWE for thirty seconds of Raw. It’s hard to complain about something like that.

We recap the opening segment.

Ryback vs. Adam Rose

Before the match, Ryback talks about wanting the spotlight and promises to take it for himself. Ryback throws him around the ring to start but Rose gets in a running kick to the chest for two. Normally I would say there’s no way WWE is going to have Ryback lose a week after a heel turn but you never can tell these days. The Backpack Stunner breaks up a chinlock and Ryback pounds away on the mat until Rose is out cold. The Shell Shock is good for the pin at 2:04.

We recap Brock’s antics last week, including laying out Ambrose and accepting his challenge for Wrestlemania.

New Day vs. AJ Styles/Chris Jericho

Non-title. After a break, New Day says they’re the greatest three man team of all time and will fight anyone who disagrees. They aren’t a loose collection of talents like the League of Nations and are better than any great team like Sonic and Tails, Snoop and Dr. Dre, Edge and Christian or Cheerios and milk. Jericho and Kofi get things going with Chris nailing a nice dropkick. Stereo dives to the champs take us to a break.

Back with Styles in trouble and taking the Unicorn Stampede thanks to some Woods interference. AJ gets dropped onto the barricade and Kofi pulls out a card to show that he has AJ’s number. Back in and the Pele drops Kofi long enough for the hot tag to bring in Jericho. Everything breaks down with Jericho destroying the champs but having to kick out of a rollup. The Lionsault gets two on Kofi with Big E. making the save, only to get taken down by the springboard forearm. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Walls of Jericho to make Kofi tag at 8:59.

Rating: C. It’s been a bad night for champions. I’m so glad they’re putting Jericho and AJ together for a title program because having AJ face, say, Kevin Owens for the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania and letting them go nuts for fifteen minutes would just be a disaster. Normally I would complain about Jericho and Styles winning like two matches and suddenly being a top team, but that’s the extent of the division these days so it’s not the biggest problem.

Post match Jericho and Styles say they’re officially a thing and want a title shot next week on Raw.

Here’s Vince for a chat before Undertaker comes out. Vince talks about how the stars would have to align to have Shane come out here in charge on Raw the night after Wrestlemania. None of that is going to happen though because only fools believe in miracles. Vince introduces Undertaker and after three more Wrestlemanias have passed, he finally gets down to the ring.

Vince talks about how Undertaker is his destroyer but Undertaker grabs him by the throat. Once that door closes, Shane’s blood is going to be on Vince’s hands, not Undertaker’s. That’s it, after Undertaker might have been in the ring for ninety seconds. Vince isn’t done yet though, as he says Shane has lost his inheritance and is out of his will. All of Vince’s money is now going to Stephanie and Shane is no longer his son.

We look back at the Dudley Boyz beating up the Usos three weeks back.

Jey Uso vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Jey goes right after him with right hands and drives Bubba up against the ropes for some shoulders to the ribs. A superkick puts Bubba down but D-Von pulls out a table to blast Jimmy in the face. Jey superkicks D-Von but eats a Bubba Bomb for the pin at 2:11.

Goldust comes up to R-Truth in the back but Truth cuts him off to say this isn’t happening. He doesn’t want to see what costume Goldust has or what song he has to sing because he’s done with all this. Goldust walks away sad.

Kevin Owens vs. Big Show

Non-title and a rematch from Smackdown where Owens won by countout. They’re quickly on the floor with Owens hitting a superkick, followed by a tornado DDT off the apron for nine. Show slides back in but has to kick out of the backsplash at two. Owens goes up top but gets crotched, setting up a countout to give Big Show the win at 2:36.

Brie Bella is here and talking about Bryan when Lana of all people interrupts. Lana talks about how she’s a real woman with a real figure while Brie is married to a tiny goat man. A match is actually teased.

Brie Bella vs. Naomi

I’m so glad they teased this. Brie starts in on the arm to start and works on an armbar until Tamina trips her up. Back in and a legdrop gets two for Naomi and we hit the double arm crank. The split legged moonsault misses but Naomi is able to hit the dancing kicks. She misses the big kick to the head though and Brie is able to come back with the YES Kicks. Tamina offers another distraction though and Naomi puts on a crucifix to pull back on Brie’s arms while cranking on the neck for the submission at 4:07.

Rating: D-. They’re just not very good. I really don’t know how else to put it but these women really aren’t very good. Naomi is an athletic freak with no idea how to use her athleticism and Brie…..well she’s…..there’s no other way to put it other than she isn’t a good wrestler. As in she fails at almost every aspect in the ring and it’s getting harder to sit through her matches while she sponges off Bryan’s head.

Lana comes out to shake her head at Brie.

Fabulous Freebirds Hall of Fame video.

We look back at Becky vs. Sasha from earlier.

Sasha and Becky argue in the back until Charlotte comes up to say there’s going to be a rematch on Smackdown. Charlotte makes fun of them for being so excited.

We recap Vince cutting Shane out of his will and saying he won’t be his son anymore. How many times has Vince done that over the years?

Dean Ambrose vs. Alberto Del Rio

Ambrose is all bandaged up so Del Rio sends him out to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and Alberto rams shoulders into the buckle, followed by a DDT for two. The armbreaker over the top rope cranks on the bad arm even more but Dean counters the top rope double stomp. The Backstabber sends Dean outside again and now the double stomp connects from the apron. Dean beats the count back in at nine (because of course he does) so Alberto fires off kicks to the ribs.

Dirty Deeds is broken up but Dean settles for a bulldog and missile dropkick. Back up and Ambrose goes shoulder first into the post, allowing Alberto to hit the corner enziguri. Alberto misses a charge and hits the floor, allowing Dean to dive on all four of them. The referee starts counting but here’s HHH to interrupt. The distraction lets the League sneak in for the DQ at 9:40.

Rating: D+. This was a squash with Dean getting in some hope spots near the end but you knew HHH was going to get involved somehow. I can go for the League as a bunch of goons who do HHH’s bidding instead of being a featured act. It’s a good enough idea but the difference here is there’s a reason to care about someone like Ambrose. Reigns is just a guy who happens to be there and it’s a big part of why this isn’t working.

Post match HHH says Ambrose will never beat the Authority so Dean punches him in the jaw. Ambrose gets in some shots in the corner but eats a Pedigree. HHH says the match is on and leaves, because why have the match now when your opponent is done? Ah, yes, plot convenience. Ambrose crawls over to the mic and says thanks but HHH takes the jacket off and unbuttons his sleeves. HHH comes back and throws Dean to the floor, setting up the required whip over the announcers’ table. Referees come out to break it up and one actually shouts “THIS IS UNPROFESSIONAL!” HHH leaves Dean laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Save for the last five minutes, this was a disaster. The problem here is simple: I watched last week’s show. For some reason though WWE has decided to just keep showing us the same clips over and over because that’s enough to make us keep watching. The main event scene still has the same problem: Ambrose is someone people can relate to but Reigns is someone who isn’t even on the show but we’re supposed to want to see him fight in the biggest match of the year? The title shot could change things but I’d be stunned if they actually do a title change this close to Wrestlemania.

The rest of the show was horrible though with almost no good matches and the feeling that we’re somewhere in October instead of having less than five weeks before Wrestlemania. The top three matches at Wrestlemania seem to be set in stone and if that’s the case, it’s going to be a very long night in Dallas. There’s still time to shake things up and there’s a reason to hope but good night we could be in for some trouble.

Results

Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks went to a double pin

The Miz b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollup

Rusev/Sheamus b. Lucha Dragons – Kick to Kalisto’s head

Ryback b. Adam Rose – Shell Shock

Chris Jericho/AJ Styles b. New Day – Walls of Jericho to Kingston

Bubba Ray Dudley b. Jey Uso – Bubba Bomb

Big Show b. Kevin Owens via countout

Naomi b. Brie Bella – Crucifix neck crank

Dean Ambrose b. Alberto Del Rio via DQ when the League of Nations interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: February 18, 2016
Location: Citizens Bank Business Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

We’re three days away from Fastlane and the big story tonight is Brock Lesnar making a very rare Smackdown appearance. There’s no word on what he’ll be doing but you can assume it might have something to do with Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns, who are teaming together to face the Dudley Boyz tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of Ambrose losing the Intercontinental Title on Monday thanks to Stephanie’s influence.

Opening sequence.

No Mauro Ranallo tonight due to a bout with the flu.

League of Nations vs. Dolph Ziggler/Lucha Dragons

Kevin Owens is on commentary. Kalisto and Rusev get things going with the masked man firing off kicks to the meaty Bulgarian thighs. Alberto comes in and gets taken down with a standing Lionsault for two. An old Jack Brisco spinning sunset flip out of the corner looks to get two for Cara but he tagged Kalisto by mistake. Everything breaks down for a bit and the Dragons dive through the ropes to take down Sheamus and Del Rio, followed by Ziggler coming off the top to elbow all three of them as we take a break.

Back with Rusev holding Cara in a chinlock before it’s off to Del Rio for a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. That means it’s time for another chinlock from Alberto, followed by some Irish Curses from Sheamus for two. Owens goes on a funny bit about not liking idiots but having other reasons to not like Cole.

Cara finally kicks Del Rio down and tags in Ziggler to speed things up. Dolph’s superkick to Sheamus is broken up but the running DDT works a bit better. Everything breaks down and Del Rio kicks Cara in the mask, followed by throwing Kalisto hard into the barricade. Back inside, Ziggler hits a quick Fameasser for two on Sheamus, which draws Owens off commentary. The distraction lets Sheamus nail a Brogue Kick for the pin on Dolph at 11:27.

Rating: C-. So the League gets a pin on the #1 contender despite none of them having a match on Sunday’s pay per view card. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary here though and that’s pretty good for the most part. The wrestling was fine and they went with the formula that they’ve perfected on Smackdown, meaning this was acceptable but nothing I’ll remember in about an hour.

Owens leaves with Ziggler’s vest.

Tamina vs. Sasha Banks

Sasha gets slammed head first into the mat to start but flips out of a belly to back suplex to get away for a bit. The running knees in the corner have Tamina in trouble and Naomi gets knocked off the apron. A sitout bulldog sets up the Bank Statement to make Tamina tap at 2:22.

Sasha gets beaten down post match until Becky makes the save, only to be shoved away by her partner. This continues a simple story but it’s been booked well.

Post break Becky wants to know what that was. They’re coming up on Wrestlemania and it’s going to take a win at Fastlane to give them momentum. If Sasha wants to let her ego get in the way of their Wrestlemania moment, Becky is done right now. They agree to fight together on Sunday.

Here’s Chris Jericho to address AJ Styles’ challenge to him from Monday. Jericho is ready to answer but he wants AJ to be here face to face. Instead here’s the Miz to interrupt with an announcement of his own. Jericho hopes that it’s Miz quitting the business because everyone has been begging for it for years. Miz says he isn’t quitting but he certainly wouldn’t do it here. The announcement is that he’s ready to fight Jericho here and now, which earns him a throw to the floor.

Chris Jericho vs. The Miz

Thankfully this starts after a break instead of that stupid ring the bell and go to a break thirty seconds later. A suplex puts Miz down and it’s time for some right hands in the corner. Miz sends him into the post as the announcers debate what celebrity lists these two are on. The fans want AJ but get a knee to Jericho’s back and a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Jericho dropkicks him and goes up, only to get punched in the face. A trip to the floor doesn’t do much as Miz takes him back inside for more left hands to the face. We take a break and come back with Miz holding a chinlock.

The Reality Check gets two and it’s right back to the chinlockery. Jericho fights back again with an ax handle and counters another Reality Check (like any signature move, it’s only one per midcard match) into a failed Walls attempt. Miz’s short DDT and big boot get two each so he starts ripping at Jericho’s face in the corner. The running corner clothesline is easily countered into the Walls though and Miz taps at 12:22.

Rating: C+. As has been the case lately, Miz is on a roll and having a string of good matches. Now maybe that’s due to having matches against Chris Jericho and AJ Styles but at least it’s been better than the usual five minute nothings that he does every week. He’s been a good cog for this feud and kept things from being the normal tropes. Good stuff here as Miz continues to be a pleasant surprise lately.

Post match Jericho calls out AJ for the big answer. AJ comes out but Jericho doesn’t seem interested in wrestling him again. He respects Styles but doesn’t really like him, which is why there won’t be a third match. AJ blasts him in the face with his striking sequence and that’s enough for Jericho to change his mind. That’s rather heelish of AJ, who lost clean last week and now uses violence to get what he wants.

We look back at Heyman and Reigns’ exchange on Monday.

Ambrose says he’s fine after losing the title on Monday but tonight he just wants to go fight. That’s fine with Reigns, but Dean better not try that Dirty Deeds stuff again. Reigns leaves and Dean runs into Heyman. Paul shakes off Ambrose’s threats by saying Brock is here and he wants a piece of Dean. That’s freaks Ambrose out so badly that he asks Heyman for advice before deciding to deal with Brock on his own later.

New Day says they can’t wait to be on the Cutting Edge Peep Show because they’re real musicians. On Sunday they’re ready to get in their stretch limousine and make their way to the Hall of Fame. Edge and Christian are out of style because it’s not the 1990s again. Tromboning and dancing (a LOT of dancing) take us out.

Video on Charlotte, as sponsored by Geico.

Charlotte vs. Natalya

Non-title and Natalya gets the jobber entrance. Charlotte’s early headscissors attempt doesn’t work so Natalya grabs a headlock and hits a quick basement dropkick to send Charlotte outside. Ric tries to give some advice and we take a break before coming back to see Charlotte spinning out of a leg lock. Charlotte bails to the floor and a Ric distraction lets her kick Natalya in the face. Back in and it’s off to the bodyscissors for a bit before Natalya fights up and sends her outside with a German suplex. Charlotte pulls the ring skirt away though to tweak Natalya’s knee, setting up the Figure Eight for the submission at 7:40.

Rating: C-. This was fine as Natalya continues to be fine as the veteran jobber. I mean, I still don’t buy for a second that Brie is going to win the title on Sunday, even for a feel good title change to cash in on Daniel Bryan. Charlotte is getting the hang of the main roster now that she has a character but Ric needs to go as there’s really no need for him.

Post match Charlotte does the YES chants to draw Brie out. The YES Kicks send Charlotte running and a YES chant starts.

This week, Goldust is Dusta Rhymes and has some bad rap. Truth likes it to start but eventually turns him down with a rap of his own. Goldust looks sad, which makes me think they might not wind up teaming after all. At least it’s different than the Booker T. formula.

We look back at the Wyatts going even crazier and the ending of Monday’s show.

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Dudley Boyz

They take their sweet time on the entrances until Ambrose and D-Von get things going. Dean gets early near falls of a cross body and bulldog before it’s off to Bubba. A lot of shouting is enough to bring Reigns in and the crowd….doesn’t seem to care. Bubba wins a slugout and elbows Reigns in the back of the head but charges into a Samoan Drop. D-Von gets double suplexed and Bubba is sent to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Bubba cranking on Dean’s neck and the reverse 3D getting two. D-Von slaps on a chinlock (despite not actually grabbing the chin) and it’s back to Bubba for some stomping. The slow paced (and mostly ineffective) offense continues with another D-Von chinlock. It doesn’t help that we’re just waiting for Brock to come out here. Bubba tries to start a LET’S GO AMBROSE chant but it’s a Reigns distraction allowing Dean to knock Bubba down on the top rope.

Thankfully a few right hands aren’t enough to even things up and Bubba knocks him off, only to miss the backsplash. The hot tag brings in Reigns to clean house with the usual but he loads up the Superman Punch right before Brock’s music hits. The Dudleys use the entrance for a sneak attack but Reigns blocks the 3D. Dean dives onto D-Von but Brock decks him for the DQ at 13:08.

Rating: D+. This really didn’t work as most of it was the Dudleys doing slow offense until Brock came out. It wasn’t even a secret as we got a BROCK LESNAR TONIGHT graphic before the match. At least they did something besides the League of Nations to put the Shield boys over for a change though, which they’ve been getting better at in recent weeks.

Brock cleans house post match until Reigns gets in a Superman Punch. The spear almost hits Ambrose though and Dean tries Dirty Deeds, earning himself a Samoan Drop. Brock F5’s Reigns but here’s HHH (how nice of him to make an appearance as his title has been the main focus lately) to stare Brock down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They’ve been picking things up lately around here and it’s been a nice change of pace. This has felt a lot more like the wrestling show that Raw just isn’t and that’s the best thing Smackdown can really be. If nothing else this was a good way to help set up Fastlane, which had a good build all night, even if it’s for a weak pay per view.

Results

League of Nations b. Dolph Ziggler/Lucha Dragons – Brogue Kick to Ziggler

Sasha Banks b. Tamina – Bank Statement

Chris Jericho b. The Miz – Walls of Jericho

Charlotte b. Natalya – Figure Eight

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. Dudley Boyz via DQ when Brock Lesnar interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6