Smackdown – August 15, 2017: They Might Have Just Saved Summerslam
Smackdown Date: August 15, 2017 Location: Dunkin’ Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
It’s the last show before Summerslam and there’s a big main event to send us home. This week features Jinder Mahal vs. John Cena in a non-title match, which likely means that Baron Corbin and Shinsuke Nakamura will be lurking around. Other than that we’ll be pushing some of Sunday’s lower card matches as well. Let’s get to it.
A narrated video talks about tonight’s main event.
Phillips says this might be the biggest match in Smackdown’s history. This isn’t even Cena’s biggest match on Smackdown this month.
Here’s Mahal to talk about today being Independence Day in India. An Indian band performs a quick dance and then a woman sings the Indian national anthem. Mahal takes credit for the success of the WWE Network and goes on about how awesome India is until Nakamura interrupts. Nakamura says today is India’s Independence Day but it’s also Veterans Day in Japan. On Sunday, he’s taking the title. This was long and accomplished absolutely nothing.
The announcers send their best wishes to Ric Flair.
Natalya vs. Becky Lynch
Naomi comes out for commentary. Becky grabs a rollup for one but gets the taste slapped out of her mouth. That earns her a slap right back, sending Natalya to the floor as we take a break. Back with Becky caught in an abdominal stretch until she makes her comeback with the clotheslines. The Bexploder looks to set up the Disarm-Her but Becky has to escape the Sharpshooter. A top rope legdrop misses though and the Sharpshooter makes Becky tap at 7:33.
Rating: D+. Natalya continues to be the same performer she’s been for years now: completely competent in the ring but mostly lacking charisma or anything interesting. I still don’t know why she’s getting the shot when you have Becky and Charlotte on the sidelines. In theory they’re saving that for a bigger stage, but there’s not much of a bigger stage than Summerslam. Unless they’re just setting up the Money in the Bank cash-in and don’t want to waste a big match, I really don’t get the point in a glorified midcard match for the title.
Post match Naomi chases Natalya off from another Sharpshooter attack. Carmella comes out and teases cashing in her briefcase at Summerslam.
Tamina wants to know why Lana hasn’t made her ravishing yet. Lana says Tamina isn’t ready, which doesn’t sit well.
The Usos come in to see Daniel Bryan, who thinks they want him to join their rap group. It turns out they want to know which New Day members they’ll be facing Sunday. That would be Big E. and Xavier Woods, but the Usos want Woods and Kofi tonight. That’s cool with Bryan, who dances a bit as they leave.
Rusev vs. Chad Gable
Gable wastes no time in suplexing him to the floor but Rusev sends him into the steps a few times. Rusev tosses Gable over the announcers’ table and it’s a double countout at 1:16.
Post match Rusev puts Gable in the Accolade on the announcers’ table. Rusev grabs a mic and gets in the ring, only to have Orton come in from out of nowhere with an RKO. How did he not see a 6’4 wrestler running right in front of him?
Here’s AJ Styles to talk about Sunday’s match where Shane McMahon will be guest referee. AJ calls Shane to the ring and apologizes for accidentally kicking him last week. Shane says no apology is necessary but AJ is worried that Shane will use what happened last week to screw him over on Sunday. The boss says that won’t happen, but if AJ puts his hands on him on Sunday, Shane will put his hands on AJ as well.
AJ asks if that’s a threat but here’s Kevin Owens to interrupt. Owens loves those rules for Sunday because he thinks AJ has something planned. Kevin thinks AJ is going to try to get him to get into a fight with Shane on Sunday and cause a DQ. Shane tells them to shake hands but the fight breaks out with Shane having to block an errant AJ right hand. The ensuing argument lets Owens superkick Shane by mistake.
New Day vs. Usos
Non-title. Before the match, New Day said they’ll be seeing the Usos at Summerslam and goes over a list of places the Usos can see them before then. Kofi and Woods take turns hitting a long string of elbows, legdrops and splashes (over ten of them total) on Jey in the first minute. Double baseball slides drop the Usos and we take a break after a very fast start. Back with Kofi making his comeback and bringing Woods in off the hot tag to chop away. A double superkick to the legs set up a double superkick to the jaw but Jimmy makes the save. Jey superkicks Kofi’s knee and a double superkick his jaw for the pin at 7:49.
Rating: C-. That was a great opening but MY GOODNESS I’m sick of superkicks. This match didn’t even go eight minutes and there were seven superkicks included. Remember back in the day when one superkick finished a match? Well now it takes seven times that and most of them don’t even come close to finishing a match. Cool it with those already, as I assure you there are multiple other options out there.
It’s time for the final episode of Fashion Peaks with Fandango recapping everything that’s gone on so far, including the alien probes, which went very deep. They were MENTAL probes of course. Here’s Breeze in a dress and blond wig because that’s what he does these days. Breeze says they need to figure this out because the last thing they need is people thinking they’re making it up as they go along.
Fandango has a space rock that the aliens gave them, which he says can predict the future. He throws the rock and hits Ascension, who were returning pie. There’s a hair in the pie, along with a used Band-Aid and….GLUTEN! Viktor panics because they live a gluten free lifestyle and gets dragged away. There’s also a note in the pie, saying “Two B”. Fandango says he senses danger for the whole tag division. A graphic says they’ll return in two weeks.
Jinder Mahal vs. John Cena
Non-title and Jinder’s entrance is joined in progress. They fight over a test of strength to start until Cena shoves him away. One of the Singh Brothers gets in a cheap shot from the floor though and Mahal slowly takes over. Jinder throws him outside and we take a break. Back with Cena initiating his finishing sequence.
The Singh Brothers pull Mahal to the floor before the AA but the referee catches them for an ejection. That means the STF but Mahal is over to the ropes. Mahal snaps his throat across the top and hits a knee to the face for two. The Khallas is broken up and the AA….gets two? Well I’m a bit surprised. That means a super AA but here’s Corbin for the DQ at 9:59.
Rating: D. And so much for Mahal meaning much. He’s one of the worst choices for a champion you can find and now he can’t even get a full entrance in “one of the biggest matches in Smackdown history”. The fact that he didn’t get pinned helps a bit but he was completely destroyed at the end. Mahal needs to lose the title on Sunday, but it wouldn’t shock me if they kept it on him as a swerve.
Post match Corbin knocks Cena out and leaves….before realizing how stupid he would be to not cash in right now. Corbin cashes in the briefcase and IT’S ON!
Smackdown World Title: Baron Corbin vs. Jinder Mahal
Cena offers a quick distraction and Mahal grabs a rollup to retain at 9 seconds. THANK GOODNESS as that means there’s no cash-in on Sunday and we’re done with one of the stupid briefcases for the next eleven months.
Corbin is livid and Mahal celebrates with the Singh Brothers to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. That ending alone saved this show as I couldn’t be happier about the briefcase being gone. One of the dumbest things they could have done was have Nakamura win and then have Corbin cash-in to win the title. Now we don’t have to worry about that and Nakamura can Kinshasa Mahal back to the midcard where he belongs. Other than that, this was a show similar to last night as the bigger stories were in deep freeze (until the main event of course) and not much really happened. It’s not much of a show but hokey smokes that ending was a great call.
Results
Natalya b. Becky Lynch – Sharpshooter
Rusev vs. Chad Gable went to a double countout
Usos b. New Day – Double superkick to Kingston
John Cena b. Jinder Mahal via DQ when Baron Corbin interfered
Jinder Mahal b. Baron Corbin – Rollup
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
Battleground 2017: The Worst Match I’ve Seen In At Least Ten Years
Battleground 2017 Date: July 23, 2017 Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Commentators: Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton
It’s time for another pay per view before we head on to Summerslam but tonight we have a Punjabi Prison match. Yeah they’re dusting this one off because the Smackdown World Champion is of Indian descent and this is some kind of a war themed pay per view. Other than that we have John Cena vs. Rusev in a flag match to keep up the same theme. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Aiden English vs. Tye Dillinger
English sings before the match, dubbing himself the Beethoven of Baritone and the Drama King. It helps that he has one heck of a voice. English shoulders him down to start and does a quick curtsy. Dillinger comes right back with a series of very fast standing switches into an armdrag, good for a TEN. Back up and English sends him into the middle buckle before unloading with some right hands.
We come back from a break with Dillinger fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a running forearm. A spinebuster gives Tye two but he can’t hit the Tyebreaker. English gets two off a layout DDT (he lands on his stomach instead of falling backwards) and frustration is setting in. Aiden tries a Tyebreaker of his own but spends too much time giving Dillinger a ZERO, allowing Tye to slip out into a sunset flip for two. That’s fine with English though as he sends Aiden into the corner and grabs a dragon suplex which spins off into a faceplant for the pin at 9:45.
Rating: C. I had a feeling they might have English go over here as it’s fairly clear that Dillinger has already lost whatever steam he could have had coming into the main roster. English might not be much but he at least has a character, which is more than Dillinger has with a catchphrase. Dillinger will be fine for the short term but he needs something more and he needs it in a hurry.
The opening video shows wrestlers wearing war paint, which they’ve all earned. It transitions into Rusev running down America and Orton wanting his title back.
Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Usos
New Day is challenging and clad in red, white and blue. You know, because WWE wants to do an AMERICA IS AWESOME show and chose freaking Battleground while also doing GREAT BALLS OF FIRE instead of Great AMERICAN Bash. Keep up the brilliance guys. Kofi dropkicks Jey at the bell and it’s off to Woods as the challengers hit some rapid fire kicks, followed by a middle rope elbow for two, all in the first thirty seconds. The champs take over on Woods in the corner with a variety of kicks and stomps, followed by Jey hitting the running Umaga attack (with JBL mentioning Umaga by name for a change).
Woods shoves Jey off the top though and hits a missile dropkick, allowing the hot tag to Kingston. Trouble in Paradise doesn’t work so both champs are sent outside with Kofi tagging Woods. The Usos able to catch the trust fall though and Kofi gets powerbombed on the floor. A wheelbarrow suplex is countered into a faceplant for two on Jimmy but the Honor Roll is broken up.
Woods eats a pop up Samoan drop for a close two and is able to get up top for the really far elbow. That’s fine with Jimmy though who slides over for a superkick to knock Woods out of the air (SWEET) for two. We hit a Tequila Sunrise into a long half crab until Woods gets over to the rope for the break.
Kofi remembers he’s alive and comes back in with a top rope double stomp to Jimmy while Woods holds him in a backbreaker (not the Midnight Hour Tom). The champs are right back with a superkick into the Superfly Splash for an even closer near fall. Woods is back up to shove Jey off the top, leaving Jimmy to eat Trouble in Paradise. Xavier adds the really long top rope elbow for the pin and the titles at 13:43.
Rating: B+. This was straight out of the old WCW Cruiserweight Title playbook: give two people some time and let them go nuts with high spots and hot near falls. The Usos weren’t doing anything with the belts and New Day, though not what they used to be, are still flat out more popular than anyone else in the promotion so this makes a good bit of sense. I’m not sure who they feud with but at least they’re back on top.
Recap of Baron Corbin vs. Shinsuke Nakamura. Corbin attacked him at the start of the Money in the Bank ladder match and has done it multiple times since. Tonight it’s about revenge.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin
Nakamura’s pop is outstanding, even for a Philadelphia crowd. Corbin gets in his face to start but Nakamura calmly kicks him down, meaning it’s time for an early breather on the floor. They trade places with Nakamura making him wait for a bit, only to charge back in for a right hand to the jaw. We hit a bearhug of all things but Nakamura reverses into a triangle choke.
Corbin slips out of that as well and yells at the crowd before putting on the bearhug again. A chokeslam is broken up with a quick kick, followed by a spinning kick to the head. Corbin runs him over with an awesome clothesline but Nakamura knees the heck out of him to escape. Kinshasa is countered with Deep Six for two but a chokeslam is countered into a Backstabber. Nakamura loads up the reverse exploder but Corbin kicks him low for the DQ at 12:28.
Rating: C-. As usual, Nakamura continues to just kind of be there and that makes for some disappointing matches. The bearhug and ending really hold this one back too as Corbin didn’t exactly show off much here and Nakamura was exactly what he’s been doing in recent months. I hope he steps up at Summerslam because otherwise, I have no idea when he’s going to do so.
Baron goes to leave but hits Nakamura with the briefcase and adds End of Days to continue the feud.
Video on Naomi and the five potential challengers to set up the #1 contenders match.
Natalya vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Tamina vs. Lana
Elimination rules and the winner gets Naomi, on commentary here, at Summerslam. Lana is knocked to the floor to start (probably not the worst idea) and everyone else brawls inside. Natalya tries a Sharpshooter on Tamina until Lana makes the save, earning herself a showdown with Charlotte. Tamina breaks up the beatdown and the double team begins on Charlotte.
Lana completely misses a kick to the head but gets two anyway and it’s time to pose. Becky FINALLY comes back in and beats on Lana, setting up a Charlotte vs. Becky showdown. Natalya breaks it up and hits the basement dropkick for two on Charlotte. Lynch kicks Natalya in the ribs and grabs the Bexploder, followed by another one to Lana. Another Bexploder to Natalya looks to set up the Figure Eight but Charlotte can’t get it on.
The discus lariat sets up the Sharpshooter, only to have Lana make a rather illogical save. Tamina has to break up the Disarm-Her on Lana, followed by a Samoan drop. The same hold has to be broken up a second time but Becky gets the Disarm-Her on Tamina for the tap at 8:08.
The same hold gets rid of Lana at 8:38, followed by a rollup to eliminate Becky at 8:42. So we’re down to Charlotte vs. Natalya with Charlotte powerbombing her way out of an early cross armbreaker. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees though and Natalya sends her hard into the corner for the pin and the title shot at 10:58.
Rating: D+. So we sit through a bunch of stupid saves and Lana being in way over her head (she’s gorgeous, she looks amazing in her outfits and she has the character but sweet goodness it’s not working in the ring) and NATALYA wins? She’s the biggest charisma vacuum I’ve ever seen and is the definition of nothing more than a hand in the ring. You have the other options for the title shot and you pick her? Just…..why? Oh and please, PLEASE keep Naomi away from microphones. She’s just not good at talking in any form.
Natalya won’t shake Naomi’s hand.
We recap AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens. Kevin defeated him via countout earlier this summer but AJ won a battle royal to get another title shot at Battleground. Then he won the title at Madison Square Garden in a big surprise, switching the roles for this show.
US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens
Styles is defending. Owens grabs a headlock to start but AJ armdrags him out to the floor for a breather. Back in and Kevin gets taken down again, sending him outside again. A dropkick sends Owens outside for the third time but this time AJ misses a charge into the barricade. Owens grabs a long chinlock back inside, followed by a DDT to cut off AJ’s comeback.
We hit the chinlock again with Owens adding in the trash talk as only he can. The Phenomenal Rush puts Owens down and the seated forearm sends Owens over to the apron. AJ can’t lift Owens for much of anything and a missed charge sends him hard into the ropes. The fireman’s carry neckbreaker gives AJ two but the springboard 450 hits knees.
Owens nails the Cannonball for two but Styles is right back with a torture rack into the spinning powerbomb for a near fall of his own. Another springboard is broken up but Owens trips AJ up and sends him shoulder first onto the apron. Back in and the ref is bumped, leaving no one to see Owens in the Calf Crusher. He doesn’t tap but rather reverses into a Crossface on the bad shoulder. That’s reverses into a Crossface on Owens but he reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 17:44.
Rating: B. Uh….ok? Did they really just change the title at Madison Square Garden for the sake of a DVD release? The match was good enough but I’m not wild on them changing the title back and forth so fast. I was looking forward to AJ doing the Open Challenge but odds are we’re looking at a gimmick rematch at Summerslam, which doesn’t do much for me.
The Singh Brothers tell Jinder Mahal that they can’t be at ringside with him. Mahal says he has 1.3 billion people in his corner.
We recap John Cena vs. Rusev. Cena came back on the Fourth of July and talked about how much he loved America, only to have Rusev interrupt. This led to a challenge to a flag match, which Rusev accepted.
Rusev vs. John Cena
Flag match, which means you have to pull your country’s flag off a pole, take it up the ramp and put it on a pedestal to win. Cena headlocks him to start but Rusev shoves him away and goes straight for the flag. That’s not happening yet though so Cena pulls him off with something like a super bulldog.
Rusev is right back up to pull him off the top with an electric chair and it’s time to talk some trash about America. Cena gets thrown down again as this is already dragging about five minutes in. The shoulders stagger Rusev but he sends Cena outside. It’s still not enough to pull down the flag though as Cena makes the save, only to get powerbombed (kind of) back down. Rusev gets his flag down but eats a dropkick to knock it down again.
An AA lets Cena get up top but Rusev pulls him down AGAIN. Rusev’s powerbomb is countered into the STF though and Rusev taps, which means nothing. Cena grabs the American flag and jumps down into a superkick to put both guys down. The Bulgarian flag is picked up again so Cena has to dive off the apron to make a save and send Rusev into the steps.
Now it’s Cena going up the aisle but Rusev makes another save and hits him in the head with the steps. Cena gets up again and sends Rusev head first into the entrance screen. A fall away slam onto the ramp stops Cena again and it’s freaking TABLE TIME because it’s Philadelphia and ECW is still a thing. Make that two tables and just get to the AA through them so Cena can put the flag up and win.
Rusev can’t hit an AA so they knock each other down again with Cena grabbing the American flag. Why he doesn’t grab both of them and throw the Bulgarian one into the crowd isn’t clear. Rusev gets the flag stand and hits Cena over the back with it to set up the Accolade. With Cena down, Rusev gets the Bulgarian flag but has to fight out of an AA attempt. Another Accolade is broken up and Cena AA’s him through the tables, allowing him to put in the American flag for the win at 20:42.
Rating: F+. I absolutely could not stand this match as it felt like it went on for the better part of an hour. There were multiple times where they could have done ANYTHING else to get rid of the flag podium or the flag itself but they would rather walk around like they had been shot. Just awful here with a bad concept, a choreographed ending and nothing close to drama. Terrible stuff here, especially when it’s nothing more than a way to tie into the whole war/battle theme.
It’s Fashion X Files time when the Ascension comes in to say it was them all along. That’s not true though as Fandango knows they were at an Eddie Money concert on Tuesday. The lights go out and someone jumps Breeze. Someone does the same to Fandango and it’s…..not revealed who did it as someone drags Fandango’s body away. To Be Continued.
We recap Sami Zayn vs. Mike Kanellis. They’ve been having issues for a few weeks and Maria cost Sami the first match earlier this week. Tonight it’s rematch time.
Mike Kanellis vs. Sami Zayn
The Kanellis family is wearing matching Maria’s jackets with lip prints all over them with Mike adding similar tights. Sami grabs a headscissors to start and Mike is sent outside where Maria has to pull him away from an attempted dive. Back in and Mike hammers away but has to stop for a kiss from Maria (in case you thought it was one from the referee).
Sami fights out of a double arm crank and sends Mike outside for the big running flip dive. The Blue Thunder Bomb is broken up so Sami settles for the tornado DDT instead. Maria gets in the ring to block the exploder though, only to have the second attempt work just fine. The Helluva Kick gives Sami the pin at 7:19.
Rating: D. Again, I don’t think anyone was seriously thinking that Mike was the talented one of the team and this match didn’t do much to showcase himself. He’s rather average in the ring and the whole character is that he really loves his gorgeous wife. There’s nothing special in the ring to help fix a lame gimmick and that’s not a good sign for his future.
We recap the Punjabi Prison match. Orton has been dealing with the Singh Brothers in all of his matches with Mahal so it’s time to lock them out. The structure is a bit complicated as it has two cages (made of bamboo), one around the ring and the other around the outside. The regular cage around the ring has four trap doors which will open up for sixty seconds each. If they close, they can’t be reopened though and if all four close, you have to climb over the top. The first person to get out of both cages wins.
Smackdown World Title: Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton
Orton is challenging and we better have a Great Khali appearance. Randy hammers away to start and puts Mahal down before calling for the first door. Mahal dives over to keep him inside though and the clock runs out, meaning that door is no longer an option. They slug it out again with the champ getting the better of it and grabbing an armbar (as is the case in most prison fights).
The second door is opened but Orton throws him down with a fall away slam. Neither of them can get out so Mahal tries to climb, earning himself a trip right back to the mat. Mahal splashes him against the cage a few times but Orton grabs a suplex to send him into it as well. That goes nowhere either and they’ve only got one door left. The hanging DDT stuns Mahal so the fourth door is open, only to have Mahal break up the RKO with a jumping knee to the head.
Orton counters the Khallas into an RKO but the freaking Singh Brothers pop out from underneath the ring to pull Mahal through the door. Orton can’t get out in time so he easily climbs the inner cage and steps over to the outer one. THEN WHY WOULD YOU EVER BOTHER WITH THE TRAP DOORS??? Mahal drops down so the Singh Brothers pull Orton down instead.
Randy beats them up and pulls Mahal down, leaving the champ to find kendo sticks to work Orton over. Much like everything else though, Orton shrugs it off and does the same thing to Mahal to take over. One of the Brothers crawls through a hole in the cage and climbs up the outside, only to get punched down through a table (heck of a bump actually). Mahal pulls Orton back down and THIS IS STILL GOING!
The hanging DDT onto the floor should kill Mahal but that might mean the match is ending anytime soon so he’s just dazed for a few seconds. Now it’s a chair with Mahal taking a few shots to the ribs. The other brother gets knocked off the cage wall and it’s the GREAT KHALI to shake the cage as Orton tries to climb out. Khali chokes him through the cage and Mahal climbs out to retain at 27:42. Yes I said 27:42.
Rating: F-. I think this match actually broke me. I don’t remember HATING a match this much since…..geez the Russo days maybe? This could have been cut down by probably two thirds for the same result but they were literally just walking around looking for more stuff to do to each other because they didn’t have anything else to do to fill in the time.
Speaking of the time, WHY IN THE WORLD WAS THIS NEARLY HALF AN HOUR??? The show ended at eleven minutes after the hour and I’d LOVE to hear someone try to validate why it needed that extra time. I absolutely could not stand this match as it started off stupid and turned into one of the worst things I’ve seen in a very, very long time. It was long, it was stupid, and it makes the champ look like an even bigger loser than people already thought he was.
Overall Rating: D-. I know some of the stuff on here was good to very good but when your two main events are such absolute garbage and eat up nearly fifty minutes (closer to an hour with entrances/pre and post match stuff and the show runs over, there’s no way the show can be saved. Couple that with a pretty bad women’s match, a nothing Kanellis vs. Zayn match and the general feeling that this show meant very little and even the two good matches are helpless. This was terrible and it’s completely laid at the feet of whoever booked/produced the two main events. Simple awful.
Results
New Day b. Usos – Top rope elbow to Jey
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Baron Corbin via DQ when Corbin kicked him low
Natalya b. Charlotte, Becky Lynch, Tamina and Lana last eliminating Charlotte
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles – Rollup
John Cena b. Rusev – Cena put his flag on the podium
Sami Zayn b. Mike Kanellis – Helluva Kick
Jinder Mahal b. Randy Orton – Mahal escaped the prison
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
Thank goodness we’re finally here. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I can’t stand the build to this pay per view and I never have been able to. We’ve been BUILDING MOMENTUM to this show for over a month now and it’s time to finally pay it off, likely with someone who hasn’t built any momentum yet getting the big win. On top of that….well there’s not much actually as there’s a five match card with two matches being Money in the Bank ladder matches. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Hype Bros vs. Colons
This one is a bit confusing as I really don’t see the reason to have the Hype Bros, who are having their return match after being split up over the last few months due to Zack Ryder’s knee injury. In theory this would be a better spot for Breezango, who have been having issues with the Colons over the last few weeks. Either way, it’s nice to have another team on the roster, even if American Alpha is STILL sitting on the sidelines.
I’ll take the Hype Bros to win of course as there’s no reason for the Colons to beat them, especially in their first match back. The Hype Bros are still owed a Tag Team Title shot after winning the tag team battle royal a few months back so having them lose to the heel jobber tag team doesn’t make the most sense in the world. So yeah, the Hype Bros win in an entertaining match with Ryder getting the pin.
Smackdown World Title: Jinder Mahal(c) vs. Randy Orton
This is the rematch from last month when Orton lost the title in the first place for one of the biggest upsets in a very long time. That left us with Mahal as the World Champion, which has been hit or miss at best (though he hasn’t been the disaster I was expecting). Now we’re in Orton’s hometown and it’s time for his big rematch.
That being said, I don’t think he’s going to get the title back here. Mahal is the kind of guy who can hold the title for a little while longer and then lose in the big match to give someone a rub. While I have little doubt that John Cena is going to be one of the names that will get a shot, I think it’s going to be someone a little lower on the pole than Orton or Cena to take the title. Orton loses here, likely through some form of shenanigans again.
Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. New Day
I’m not sure on this one as the Usos have been entertaining with their over the top promos but they’ve hardly done anything with the titles. On the other hand you have the New Day, who really seem like they’re just playing the greatest hits. New Day has been in a weird place for a good while now as they really don’t have anything going on at the moment but have also outgrown the tag division. Why they’re not in the ladder match helping Kofi Kingston win the briefcase isn’t clear but my guess is that’s a bit too complicated for the “creative” staff.
I think I’ll go with the Usos retaining here, unfortunately as we continue to wait on the return of American Alpha to go after the belts again. The tag division looks good on Tuesday nights but when you actually look at what they’ve got going on, things take quite the fall. New Day is a great addition to the division but I don’t think they’re going to be getting the belts here.
Smackdown Women’s Title: Naomi(c) vs. Lana
This is one of those rare matches where the result is going to depend on what you think is going to happen in the Money in the Bank ladder match. At the moment, I think a certain heel is going to be winning the briefcase and as a result, it should be the face winning here. On the other hand, I have a bit of a difficult time believing that Lana is going to be hyped up so much, only to lose in her singles debut.
I’ll stick with my original train of thought though and go with Naomi retaining. They’ve done a good job of setting Naomi up as a major player in the division as she’s gone from pretty much nothing to someone who feels like a star. Lana should get a big push down the line, but I don’t think she’s going to win here, likely so WWE can have someone chase her with a briefcase.
Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match
And now it’s time for a mess. It’s always hard to guess what they’re going to do here but as is usually the case, a heel is the better option to win. I have a hard time getting behind the idea that a face is going to be chasing the champion and basically trying to steal the title from a downed champion. They’ve kept this down to six names this year which should make for a better match, though it also keeps the options for winners down.
That being said, I’ll go with Baron Corbin winning here. There’s no change Dolph Ziggler is going to win (please don’t let that come back and bite me), Sami Zayn winning doesn’t quite feel right, AJ Styles and Shinsuke Nakamura don’t need to win a briefcase to be in the title hunt, Kevin Owens shouldn’t win while still being US Champion. Corbin has kind of been left off to the side, and that would make him a good Mr. Money in the Bank.
Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match
That still feels weird to write out. This is another of those groundbreaking matches which is likely going to be treated as something that is bigger than it is good, though that’s not the worst thing in the world. They’ve set up some potential options here, but the favorite almost has to be Charlotte, who tends to dominate everything else with no one (save for Sasha Banks) really coming near her.
That being said, I’ll go with Carmella to win. Charlotte seems too obvious, Natalya and Tamina aren’t interesting enough and Becky Lynch is someone who has been there before. Carmella feels like Corbin earlier, and that means she could sneak in under the radar and take the case. If this goes on before Naomi vs. Lana, I really wouldn’t be surprised to see her cash in the briefcase that night and walk away with the title. At least it would be nice if that was the case so we don’t have to have another briefcase running around for months.
Overall Thoughts
I’m not sure on this one but the good thing about having a show with such a short card is that only two or so matches need to be good to really make it work. However, it can also mean that the show can go badly for the exact same reason. The good thing though is that a gimmick show like this is almost always going to be good because the namesake matches are going to be entertaining enough on their own.
I’m hoping that at least one of the briefcases will be cashed in tomorrow night as I really can’t stand the briefcases, at least in the way that they’re booked most of the time. They’re going to be around though and if the big matches are good enough then the rest of the show is going to work as a result. Just keep the Orton vs. Mahal match short so we can get on to John Cena making his return and going after the title, as he probably should have done.
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Smackdown – April 11, 2017: The Ugly Stepchild of WWE
Smackdown Date: April 11, 2017
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
It’s the second night of the Superstar Shakeup which means we’ll be seeing a lot of new names showing up tonight. That primarily means names from Monday Night Raw but there’s also the chance of some people from NXT or maybe even the cruiserweights of 205 Live. Let’s get to it.
We open with the debuting Kevin Owens(in a suit), who declares this the new Kevin Owens Show. Now some people might be confused about how a Canadian can be the face of the United States but it makes perfect sense. Canadians are just better athletes than Americans and there’s no denying it. Just look at the Montreal Canadiens defeating the Boston Bruins all the time. There’s no one in the back that can beat him because he is the new face of America.
Cue Baron Corbin of all people to say that Owens can’t beat him up. Last week Corbin beat Dean Ambrose up so badly that he ran off to Raw. Last night, Ambrose beat Owens up so badly that he came here so that means Corbin should get a US Title shot. Owens says no but here’s the debuting Sami Zayn (JUST LET HIM STAY AWAY FROM OWENS FOR FIVE MINUTES!) to send Owens into a near fit because he can never escape. Sami wants a shot as well but here’s AJ Styles, who is actually still on Smackdown.
AJ gets a huge face reception and says this place is still about him. This brings out Daniel Bryan to say Owens vs. Chris Jericho is still on for Payback and the winner will officially be on Smackdown. The title can’t be defended until then though, but tonight we’re going to crown a new #1 contender for the US Title. Tonight it’s Styles vs. Corbin vs. Zayn for the future shot.
Randy Orton vs. Erick Rowan
Non-title. Orton hammers away to start but gets shoved into the corner. Erick rains down right hands until Orton grabs the powerslam and does the Garvin Stomp. They head outside with Rowan getting sent into the steps, followed by the elevated DDT. The RKO is loaded up but Bray appears on screen, already making the Superstar Shakeup seem worthless. Seriously it hasn’t even been twenty four hours. Wyatt says he’s everywhere and will see Orton in the House of Horrors. The lights come back up and Rowan hits Orton with the steps for the DQ at 3:50.
Rating: D-. I was tempted to not rate this one as a minute and a half of it was spent on watching Orton listen to Bray. Hopefully things are all square after Payback as these show vs. show matches defeat the point of the Shakeup (just do the Shakeup later). The match was a squash until the ending and I’m kind of glad they didn’t have Rowan just lose clean again.
Rowan gives Orton a full nelson slam.
Tag Team Titles; Usos vs. American Alpha
Alpha is defending in their rematch after losing the belts last month. The Usos don’t even get an entrance. Jimmy and Chad start things off with Alpha using some early double teaming to take over. Both champs are sent to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Jimmy kicking Jason in the face but getting sent hard into the corner. The hot tag brings in Chad to clean house, including a great looking moonsault for two on Jimmy.
Some double teaming puts Gable in trouble but the Superfly Splash hits knees for two. The Steiner Bulldog gets a very close two with Jey making a save. Alpha is sent outside for stereo suicide dives but you don’t dive at suplexers as Alpha grabs stereo belly to belly suplexes. Back in and Jey makes a blind tag, setting up a superkick into the Superfly Splash to retain at 8:51.
Rating: B. Good stuff here as you would expect but can we PLEASE have someone show up to bolster the division a little bit? Right now it’s these two and whomever else we can find as jobbers that week. With a roster as deep as WWE has, there’s really no excuse to not be able to put four teams together for a regular division.
Post match the Shining Stars run in and leave American Alpha laying.
Mojo Rawley vs. Jinder Mahal
Rob Gronkowski is in the front row again. Mahal starts fast and takes Rawley down for a kneedrop and armbar. Jinder makes the mistake of going after Gronkowski though and gets a cup thrown on him, allowing Mojo to take him back inside. The running right hand puts Jinder away at 2:41. At least it was short.
Mojo celebrates with some New England Patriots.
Here’s Shane McMahon to address the Women’s Division. They’ve acquired some new talent but he’d like to have the entire division come out here. This brings out Naomi, Natalya, Carmella (with James Ellsworth) and Becky Lynch. Since that’s the entire division so far, Shane stops to congratulate Naomi but Ellsworth takes the mic to say Naomi is horrible.
Naomi threatens violence and says bring out the new talent. That would mean a long introduction for a second generation star and the daughter of a Hall of Famer: Tamina! I don’t think that really counts as a new talent as she was out injured and never officially on Raw. Shane isn’t done though and brings out Charlotte for the real big surprise.
Sin Cara and Rusev (no mention of Lana) are coming to Smackdown.
Here’s Aiden English on his own to ask for a spotlight. In a callback to his NXT days, English sings a song about himself, only to be cut off.
Aiden English vs. Tye Dillinger
Tye gets the important things out of the way first with a snapmare and cartwheel into TEN. English takes him into the corner and sings that this is his show. The Tyebreaker is good for the pin on English at 2:20.
Video on AJ Styles.
Video on Lana dancing around a chair in a very revealing red dress. She’s on Smackdown too and seems to be her own act instead of with Rusev.
Here’s Dolph Ziggler to talk about how awesome he is and how the Superstar Shakeup doesn’t matter. Cue Shinsuke Nakamura for his full entrance. Ziggler asks who Nakamura thinks he is so the fans sing his song. Nakamura says his name and blocks a superkick, setting up the BRING IT pose. Ziggler bails of course.
Video on Baron Corbin.
New Day is coming to Smackdown. Now that helps things a lot.
Video on Sami Zayn.
Sami Zayn vs. AJ Styles vs. Baron Corbin
The winner gets a US Title shot at some point after Payback. Styles and Zayn go after Corbin to start but he suplexes both of them at once without much effort. A double clothesline sends Corbin outside, leaving us with a Zayn vs. Styles showdown. Corbin pulls Styles to the floor but Sami moonsaults onto both of them as we take a break. Back with Corbin in full control, hitting a side slam and big boot for two on Styles.
AJ grabs the Hoshi Geroshi on Sami but gets blasted by a clothesline from Corbin to put all three down. Corbin takes a knee to the face and Sami grabs the Blue Thunder Bomb for two on AJ. Baron gets back up for one heck of a Deep Six on Sami with AJ making the save. The springboard 450 gets two on Corbin with Sami making a last second save this time around. That earns him a Pele kick but the Clash is backdropped to the apron. The Helluva Kick drops Corbin, only to have AJ hit the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin on Sami at 16:42.
Rating: B. Corbin is getting better and better every single week and working with people like AJ and Sami is only going to help him even more. AJ winning is a bit of a surprise but he immediately elevates the US Title. I do wonder who is next for Orton after this as you would think AJ would have been a good choice for the next challenger after Wyatt.
Overall Rating: B-. While I’m going to need some more time to figure out how much I liked the second half of the Superstar Shakeup, the first instinct would be to think that it went a lot better for the red show. The big names here are New Day, Charlotte and Owens, but the problem is a lot of the names are nothing. I mean, Sin Cara? The Shining Stars? Jinder Mahal? Those aren’t exactly exciting names. Then again, did anyone really expect WWE to put a focus on Smackdown?
The show itself was good enough with a good Tag Team Title match and main event but we still don’t really have a feel for how things are going to go on this show. The problem is we won’t until after Payback, which makes things a bit more complicated than they need to be. Smackdown has potential but they’re lacking a top level star (remember that Cena is going to be gone for well over a month), which is a problem they’ve had for a long time.
Results
Randy Orton b. Erick Rowan via DQ when Rowan used the steps
Usos b. American Alpha – Superfly Splash to Gable
Mojo Rawley b. Jinder Mahal – Running punch
Tye Dillinger b. Aiden English – Tyebreaker
AJ Styles b. Baron Corbin and Sami Zayn – Phenomenal Forearm to Zayn
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Monday Night Raw – April 10, 2017: Shake Shake Shake
Monday Night Raw Date: April 10, 2017
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
In case last week’s post-Wrestleania show wasn’t enough for you, this week we have the first half of the Superstar Shakeup, which will see various talents going to the other shows. In other words, it’s whatever they can call the Draft this time around. We’re also less than three weeks away from Payback so let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here are Miz and Maryse as Cena and Nikki for their return to Raw. Miz knows they said they were going to Hollywood but it turns out they sucked as actors. So what better way to revamp their careers than come back here? Cue Dean Ambrose, who is so glad to see John and Nikki and congratulates them on their engagement.
Miz tries to explain this to him but Dean cuts them off and congratulates them on beating the horrible Miz and Maryse at Wrestlemania. Dean loved Cena’s commercial as an elephant but warns against doing something stupid like making Marine 5. Miz reveals their real identities….and gets taken down by Dirty Deeds.
Kurt Angle is on the phone when Sami Zayn comes in to ask if he’s going to Smackdown. Does being here tonight mean he’s staying on Raw? Angle cuts him off and says there’s a lot of interest from Smackdown, which Sami asks him to quantify. Miz and Maryse come in to cut him off to trigger an argument, which sets up a match between the two. Angle looks like he’s about to snap after being here two weeks.
New Day vs. Revival
Woods and Big E. here as Kofi is out after Revival severely hurt his ankle. Not to worry though as Big E. has a Kofi blowup doll as a replacement. Revival mocks Kofi’s injury via some custom t-shirts and are quickly taken down for their efforts. New Day works on Wilder until we take an early break. Back with Dawson working on Woods’ ribs as we hear more about Kofi’s ankle injury and subsequent surgery. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house with belly to bellies and a Warrior splash on Wilder.
Dawson gets in a cheap shot to give Dash two, only to have Woods hit a ridiculous springboard elbow (who was less than a foot from the opposite rope) for two on Scott. Revival makes a blind tag and breaks up the Midnight Hour, only to have Woods dive right into the Shatter Machine for the pin at 7:56.
Rating: B-. The last two weeks have been EXACTLY how Revival should have been debuted. Revival has beaten an all time great team twice in a row and it’s not like New Day is going to lose anything as a result. They’ve been bulletproof for a long time now so putting Revival over like this isn’t going to cause them any harm.
Neville isn’t worried about facing Austin Aries again when TJ Perkins comes up. TJ threatens to make Neville eat his words but Neville calls him a joke. Perkins won the Cruiserweight Classic but once 205 Live debuted, TJ’s career has gone nowhere. Now all of TJ’s opportunities are being taken by people like Aries. The only person with any respect for Perkins is Neville, which seems to get TJ’s attention. Cue Aries to say he’s earned all these opportunities but TJ doesn’t seem to buy it.
Curt Hawkins is here to call himself the biggest acquisition since the Louisiana Purchase. This brings out Big Show to knock him out with one punch. For some reason this makes Cole speculate that Big Show is going to Smackdown.
Austin Aries vs. TJ Perkins
Aries’ title shot will officially come at Payback. Neville is on commentary and Cole asks if he can play journalist for a minute. Neville: “Nope.” Perkins takes Aries down with a headscissors but stops to check his hair and dab a bit. They run the ropes with Aries cartwheeling away and catching Perkins with a basement dropkick.
That earns Aries a quick rest on top and some mocking of Perkins’ taunting. TJ misses his pendulum dropkick and gets taken down by a neckbreaker across the middle rope. Aries dives off the top and that’s too much for Neville, who comes down the ramp for a staredown. The distraction lets Perkins grab a small package for the pin at 3:36.
Rating: C. This has me interested as Aries vs. Neville II sounds good but Perkins is one of the only names that could hang on their level if he’s on top of his game. If nothing else it could mean Perkins turning heel, which he should have done about six months ago. Good enough match here but the angle is more important.
Aries stares Neville down but Perkins comes in and gives Aries the Detonation Kick, seemingly turning full heel.
Here’s Seth Rollins for a chat. He didn’t know if he would ever be in this ring again because he gave everything he had to get ready for Wrestlemania. Last week he woke up after a war with HHH and his knee had never been in so much pain. All he knew was that he had never felt so good because at Wrestlemania, he slayed the King.
There are a lot of things Rollins wants to do around here (“The name Samoa Joe comes to mind.”), including wanting to get his hands on the Universal Title. However, something happened at Wrestlemania that might prevent it from happening. We see a clip of Stephanie being knocked through a table, which means she’ll be out for a while. Then she’ll be back though and Rollins becomes public enemy #1. Therefore, it’s probably easier for him to go to Smackdown. That’s not what’s going to happen though as Seth took the easy way out once and he’s not doing it again.
Cue Angle to say that yes, Stephanie made it clear she wants him gone. Angle watched Wrestlemania though and saw Seth win a fight on one leg. Stephanie’s opinion aside, as long as Angle is in charge, Seth has a home here on Raw. Angle goes to leave but Samoa Joe comes in for the fight. Rollins superkicks him to the floor though and Joe bails.
Kevin Owens doesn’t care about the Superstar Shakeup because he’ll be on top of either brand. He says go find Chris Jericho and ask him about the Shakeup because he’d love to go to Smackdown and find some success. Owens is the top champion on Raw and doesn’t want to hear about Dean Ambrose.
Charlotte vs. Nia Jax
Nia runs her over to start and scores with a shoulder breaker to really take over. Some elbows to the back have Charlotte reeling and it’s off to a chinlock. The fans look at something in the crowd as Nia throws Charlotte down but some shots to the ribs give Charlotte an opening. A chop block sets up Natural Selection for two and Nia goes shoulder first into the post. Charlotte hits the moonsault to the floor with her boot hitting Nia square in the head. Nia barely makes it back inside and the Figure Four is easily blocked. A Samoan Drop crushes Charlotte for the pin at 5:58.
Rating: C. This was sloppy at times but it completely got the point across. Nia looks like a much bigger deal now as beating Charlotte is still a huge accomplishment with only a handful of people being able to do it on occasion. Jax still needs experience but once she gets that under her belt, she’s going to be something very special.
Video on Finn Balor.
Jinder Mahal vs. Finn Balor
Balor starts fast with some kicks until Mahal blasts him with a forearm to the jaw. Not that it matters as he kicks Mahal in the head and scores with the Sling Blade. The running corner dropkick sets up the Coup de Grace to put Jinder away at 2:48.
With Balor still in the ring, Bray Wyatt pops up on screen to say he’s here on Raw. In three weeks, the entire world will be able to see him torture Randy Orton at Payback in a House of Horrors match. On the other hand, Balor needs to watch himself because Bray will be watching him.
We look back at the opening sequence.
Apollo Crews, Kalisto, Heath Slater and Rhyno are all coming to Raw.
The Miz vs. Sami Zayn
Sami does his springboard leapfrog to set up the armdrags, followed by a clothesline to send Miz outside. Miz hides behind Maryse to prevent the dive though and we take a break. Back with Sami fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught in a DDT for two. Miz does the YES Kicks but Sami reverses into the Blue Thunder Bomb for its traditional near fall. Maryse makes the save by pulling Miz away from the Helluve Kick but Sami grabs a rollup for the pin at 7:39.
Rating: C+. Not bad here and it’s always nice to see Sami get a win like this. I’d still like to see Sami head over to Smackdown and now he might even go over with some fresh momentum. At the moment, Smackdown is running very low on talent so hopefully someone goes over to the blue show to balance things out a bit.
In the back, Michael Cole has a sitdown interview with Roman Reigns. Roman says the win over Undertaker was the biggest win of his career but it was bittersweet. He’s had great guidance but he’s not sure how you retire someone you respect so much. Braun Strowman comes in and the fight is on with Reigns being destroyed.
Reigns gets powerlsammed onto an anvil case and Braun crushes him by wheeling another case into Reigns’ head. Fans: “THANK YOU STROWMAN!” Reigns is taken out on a stretcher. Fans: “YOU DESERVE IT!” Strowman shoves the stretcher down a flight of stairs, drawing the pop of the night. Reigns is wheeled into the ambulance. Braun: “I’M NOT THROUGH WITH YOU YET BOY!” Strowman beats him up even more and TURNS THE AMBULANCE OVER with Reigns inside.
Post break Reigns is loaded into a new ambulance, which unfortunately isn’t being driven by Strowman.
Hardys/Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Shining Stars/Anderson and Gallows
Before the bell, Elias Samson wanders out onto the stage, sending Graves through the roof due to his long standing hatred of all things Samson. Anderson gets taken down to start with Sheamus dropping a knee. Back from a break with Cesaro in trouble and Sheamus having to make a save. That earns him a Backstabber from Prim but allows Cesaro to dive over for the hot tag to Matt. Everything breaks down and Gallows breaks up a Side Effect. Sheamus and Cesaro send Anderson and Gallows to the floor, leaving Jeff to hit a Poetry in Motion flip dive onto the floor. Back inside, Primo takes the Twist and Swanton for the pin at 7:48.
Rating: C-. This match had no chance of following the Strowman and Reigns segment and I think everyone knew it. The Hardys are still a great nostalgia act but if they’re just Matt and Jeff, I’m not sure how long they’re going to be able to last at this level. Then again, I’m not sure how long they’re supposed to last.
The winners pose for a good while.
Dana Brooke is reading “How to Be Your Own Protege” when Emma comes in. She seems to think Dana still works for her but Dana says that was last year and things have changed.
Here’s Sasha Banks to introduce Bayley for a chat. Bayley thanks everyone for their support because she’s still the same 12 year old girl that loved this so much. Sasha congratulates Bayley for her win but now she wants a title shot of her own. Cue Alexa Bliss to say the two of them are nauseating.
She’s the two time Smackdown Women’s Champion and now wants to add the Raw Women’s Title. This brings out Mickie James to say Bayley’s nightmare is just beginning. Before she can go any further, here’s Nia Jax to run her over. Bliss pushes Banks into Nia, who sends her outside. Bayley gets planted with the Samoan drop and Nia says the title is hers.
Reigns has cracked ribs, internal injuries and a possible separated shoulder.
Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens
Non-title. An early Dirty Deeds attempt sends Owens bailing to the floor but Dean whips him into the barricade. Dean scores with a dive and we take a break. Back with Dean caught in a chinlock. Owens: “I could do this all night baby!” Dean fights up and gets sent outside in a crash, followed by a ram into the post. Back in and Ambrose gets in a good shot to knock Owens outside, setting up a suicide dive.
That’s not enough for Dirty Deeds though but Owens misses a Cannonball. Dean clotheslines him down but Kevin bails outside. That’s fine with Dean, who hits the top rope elbow. Back in and Owens hits the package piledriver slam for two as the fans want Jericho. The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered but Owens escapes Dirty Deeds as well. A superkick blocks the rebound lariat but Dean rolls through into Dirty Deeds for the clean pin at 14:15.
Rating: B. Lack of caring from the crowd aside (yeah fans aren’t that interested in a match with nothing on the line after a three and a half hour taping and no story in sight), this was a good back and forth fight between two people with underrated chemistry. I liked it more than I was expecting to but it was missing something to take it to the next level.
Post match Chris Jericho comes out to hit Owens with a Codebreaker to end the show.
Overall Rating: B-. The wrestling was much better than usual here and they added some big names to the Raw roster, which should really freshen things up a lot. They still need to get rid of some of the excess names because the roster is rather bloated (getting rid of the Cruiserweights would be a good place to start) and I’m sure five or six names will be heading to Smackdown otherwise. Good show here as they kept the energy up, complete with some hilariously unintentional comedy (I think?) with Strowman vs. Reigns.
Results
Revival b. New Day – Shatter Machine to Woods
TJ Perkins b. Austin Aries – Small package
Nia Jax b. Charlotte – Samoan Drop
Finn Balor b. Jinder Mahal – Coup de Grace
Sami Zayn b. The Miz – Rollup
Hardys/Sheamus/Cesaro b. Anderson and Gallows/Shining Stars – Swanton Bomb to Primo
Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens – Codebreaker
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Wrestlemania XXXIII Preview: Overall Thoughts
Ice cream is a powerful weapon.
Yeah I know the card doesn’t look great (mainly due to the top) but it does have one thing going for it: this is Wrestlemania. There have been times where a lot of things look horrible but this show is something special. There’s something about it that makes the show worthwhile almost every single year (ok so they’re on a losing streak right now). There’s going to be something worth seeing on the show and it’s going to be good.
As mentioned, I’m certainly looking forward to Owens vs. Jericho and any match where we could get some kind of a surprise. Couple that with New Day doing some shenanigans and possibly providing us with ice cream and the show has some potential. The show should be a good time (a very long time) and I’m sure there’s going to be a lot of strong stuff on there.
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I know Wrestlemania XXXII was bad, but is XXXIII going to be even worse? Let’s look at five arbitrary points!
Main Event – February 2, 2017: It Almost Rocks
Main Event Date: February 2, 2017
Location: Laredo Energy Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Austin Aries, Byron Saxton
We’re officially on the Road to Wrestlemania and hopefully that means Main Event ups its talent for a change. It’s hard to say what we’ll be getting here as it almost always the case, which makes for some interesting shows. Some star power, even in the short term, would be nice around here. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Sin Cara vs. Bo Dallas
Aries says he’s feeling bo-tivated. I’ll just leave you with that one and move on to Cara armdragging Dallas out of the corner for the first real offense. That earns Cara a neckbreaker and some knees to the back of the head, followed by a chinlock. Back up and Cara sends him to the floor for a suicide dive, followed by a springboard moonsault press for two back inside. The Swanton Bomb gives Cara the pin at 3:49.
Rating: D+. Just a quick match here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Cara winning over a heavyweight, even one who doesn’t do much, is a good idea as there’s no reason to suggest that someone who has been around for several years would have an issue just because he’s fighting someone a bit heavier than he is.
Video on Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens from Royal Rumble.
From Raw.
Universal Title: Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman
Owens is defending and I’ll put the over/under for Reigns interfering at four minutes. Jericho is on commentary and for some reason, Strowman goes over and chokeslams him through the table. Owens bails to the floor at the bell and some right hands have no effect. A dropkick puts Strowman on the floor but he runs Kevin over with ease back inside.
Kevin is knocked into the barricade and this is one sided so far. The way too long charge sends Strowman head first into the post though and Owens adds a Cannonball against the barricade. A backsplash and frog splash give Owens two but Strowman comes back with the powerslam. Cue Reigns though and it’s a DQ at 4:40.
Rating: D+. Yeah what else were you expecting here? This might as well have been a big countdown to Reigns coming out and going after Strowman, which is probably one of the top matches at Fastlane. It’s not the most interesting match in the world but if Strowman goes over, it could mean something.
Roman Superman Punches and spears Strowman but Braun pops up.
From Raw again.
Here are Lesnar and Paul Heyman for a chat. Heyman talks about how every legend has an asterisk next to his name because there’s always an exception. Andre the Giant was undefeated for fifteen years until Hulk Hogan beat him. Ronda Rousey was undefeated until she met Holly Holm. People like John Cena and Kurt Angle have amazing legacies but BROCK LESNAR. That leaves Goldberg as the argument against Brock and that must be eradicated. We get to the point: Lesnar wants one more fight with Goldberg at Wrestlemania.
New Day vs. Shining Stars/Titus O’Neil
This is certainly an upgrade. The trio takes over on Epico to start with Kofi kicking him in the chest to set up Big E.’s Warrior splash for two. All six wind up in the ring and New Day puts on a triple abdominal stretch with spankings. Back from a break with Titus coming in off a blind tag and suplexing Woods. It’s off to Primo for a slingshot splash and armbar but Woods enziguris Titus down and it’s Kofi time. The SOS gets two on Primo and everything breaks down. Epico hits the Backstabber on Kofi but a quick Midnight Hour puts Epico away at 10:36.
Rating: C-. Standard six man here and I can even forgive having to sit through Titus against New Day again. It really does help to have someone that the fans care about in a match on this show after all the weeks of Darren Young. The Shining Stars are fine enough in the ring and there’s nothing wrong with being jobbers to the stars.
Video on Seth Rollins’ return from injury.
We’ll wrap it up with this.
Here’s HHH to talk about Rollins. HHH goes over his history with Rollins and takes credit for most of his success. With HHH by his side, Rollins would become the man and the face of the WWE. All Rollins had to do was hold up his end of the bargain but then his knee gave out, which was like spitting in HHH’s face.
Rollins was a failure when he came back because he didn’t take any responsibility for everything falling apart. HHH is the one that deserves an apology because Rollins tried to blame him for everything being a big mess. The reason HHH doesn’t come out here anymore is because he doesn’t want to be the guy that ends careers anymore.
Every day he puts on this suit and ties this tie while trying to be a creator. Every day he tries to create the next Seth Friggin Rollins but now he’s done trying. The jacket and tie come off, drawing a HHH chant. HHH calls Rollins out so here we go….but SAMOA JOE makes his debut and lays Rollins out from behind. Joe annihilates Rollins as HHH leaves. The fans are very happy with Joe as he Koquina Clutches Rollins out to end the show, wrenching Seth’s knee in the process.
Overall Rating: C. I can’t emphasize enough how much it helped to have someone like New Day on this show. They weren’t in any danger and their match didn’t mean anything but it helped so much to have them on the show and doing something instead of the usual old acts. The stuff from Raw helped a lot too, making this one of the better episodes in a long time.
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Best of 2016: Tag Team/Stable of the Year
What do you get when you put a bunch of wrestlers in one place and have people watch them? You get…..well normally you get a wrestling show but what I’m talking about here is a stable. Today we’re looking at the tag team/group of the year but before we get there, I need to write off a few names that will NOT be on the list for various reasons.
First up are the Bullet Club and Los Ingobernables de Japon. I know who both of them are and I’ve seen some of their work but I haven’t seen enough of them to really put something together about them. Now go ahead and tell me how horrible I am for not watching enough New Japan.
Second, the Young Bucks won’t be on here for reasons of I can’t stand them.
As usual these are in no particular order.
1. DIY.
Do I need to do anything else here besides just showing you their matches with the Revival? That match in Toronto is almost a guarantee for Match of the Year (or a tie in my case) and that makes them really hard to overlook. The guys are just flat out awesome and know how to do this tag team thing like almost no one else can today. They’re entertaining guys and that’s all that matters down in NXT.
What’s even more impressive about DIY is the fact that they were able to do this while following American Alpha, who looked like the best team in a long time. What does it tell you when a team has to follow the best team people have seen in years and manage to outshine them and have an even better match? That just does not happen in wrestling and that’s what we got with DIY.
2. Enzo and Big Cass.
Now this is at the entirely different end of the spectrum as Enzo and Cass aren’t exactly the most technically sound team in the world but they’re just so entertaining almost every single week. If nothing else, just look at them as Woody and Buzz Lightyear on the Halloween episode of Monday Night Raw. That brought a genuine smile to my face and that doesn’t happen very often.
I don’t know if Enzo and Cass will ever be a serious tag team but if all they do is serve as a means to make Cass into a singles star, that’s just fine. Enzo is a great talker and gets to showcase that gift of jab as long as he doesn’t keep getting hurt. Cass is the real star of the team though and there’s a lot of entertainment to be had watching him try to do the East River Crossing on big guys.
3. Broken Hardys.
I’ve talked a lot about how amazing the Broken Universe stuff was in 2016 but what a lot of people overlook is how the wrestling has gone. While Matt might not be the best in ring performer, Jeff is still better than most wrestlers in the company and can more carry the team when they’re actually having matches.
I know the Hardys are entertaining but if you have the Tag Team Titles for so many months, you have to be able to do more than just do some weird stuff in the backyard. Let Jeff do most of the match while Matt gets to be a little wacky on the side but I wouldn’t go much further than that. The key to the Hardys is to keep Matt under control and let the great team be great, which doesn’t happen often enough.
4. American Alpha.
You knew I was going to get here at some point. American Alpha absolutely took NXT by storm and looked like one of the best tag teams of all time. They had one of the best opening matches of all time against Revival at Takeover: Dallas and wound up winning the Smackdown Tag Team Titles to end the year.
That’s where the team moves up a spot for me: not only did they have success on the NXT roster but they also pulled off something special on the main roster in such a short time. They’re one of the most entertaining teams I’ve seen in a long time and are basically the modern Steiners. They even used the Steiner Bulldog as a nice tribute and that’s never a bad thing at all.
5. Revival.
Speaking of American Alpha, this team managed to go from one excellent feud to an even better one with a pair of match of the year candidates. I can’t remember the last time that happened and it’s just amazing to watch. This is a team that just gets how to be villains and while I’m not sure that’s going to work so well on the main roster, it’s made for some outstanding stuff down in NXT.
It’s so rare to see a team that wrestles the old school work on a body part style in the vein of the Andersons and that means we got to see Andersons vs. Steiners in 2016. I had a blast watching that American Alpha match but I was blown away seeing them have a completely different style match against DIY. Maybe they won’t do well on NXT but it was more than worthy of being the best team in NXT.
6. New Day.
Oh yeah you knew we were getting here at some point. New Day might be the most over tag team since the Legion of Doom and that’s some very rare company to be in. They were one of the most over teams you’ll ever see and sweet goodness the pops and merchandise sales are unthinkable. Then there’s the whole longest reigning Tag Team Champions in history and all that jazz.
I don’t know what New Day does going forward but they’re some of the most entertaining tag wrestlers in a long time. They managed to take some of the dumbest jokes in wrestling history and turned them into either a t-shirt or a freaking cereal that was sold in stores. How in the world does that even work? Like….THEY HAVE THEIR OWN CEREAL!
Overall though, I’m going with Revival. I just can’t get over how amazing they managed to become in the ring and having two outstanding matches (not counting the other great stuff they did aside from the two title losses). I’d love to see them on the main roster but if they just have to stay down in NXT and be one of the best tag teams in the last twenty five years, so be it.
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As much as wrestling is built on wrestling, what really matters the most are the moments that come to define wrestling. The little pieces of a match or a show are what will be put on highlight reels and designed to last forever. How many times have you heard about the Wrestlemania moment being what matters almost more than the match results themselves? Every year has a list of special things to see and today we’re looking at the moments of the year. As always, these are in no particular order.
1. New Day Breaks Demolition’s Record – Monday Night Raw – December 12
We’ll start with the most recent moment as one of the longest standing record title reigns came to an end. Originally set in 1989, Demolition had held the record for the longest Tag Team Title reign in WWE history (assuming you ignore the Women’s Tag Team Titles of the late 1980s) and it had seemed almost unapproachable. However, about halfway through the year, it became clear that New Day might actually have a shot at it.
New Day won the Tag Team Titles at “Summerslam 2015” and managed to hold onto them for over a year, putting them just a few months away from the record. With just a few weeks to go, New Day had one team after another thrown at them with a final triple threat match left between them and the record. New Day survived that title defense and then a second announced during the show, leaving them with the new record in a great show of emotion.
This is one of the moments that is more historic than anything else. The idea of someone breaking a record that was set the better part of thirty years ago seems almost unthinkable anymore but New Day managed to pull it off. The smiles on all three members’ faces showed you everything you needed to know about the moment and the team surviving was exactly what it needed to be.
2. AJ Styles Debuts – Royal Rumble
Since the debut of TNA in 2002, Styles was one of the biggest names to never work for WWE full time. Early in 2016, that changed forever as Styles debuted for the company as the #3 entrant in the Royal Rumble. This was the kind of thing that the Royal Rumble is made for and it became one of the best debuts ever in the history of the event.
Now that being said, WWE almost managed to screw this up. If you notice in the video, we don’t actually see Styles make his debut as the camera is locked in on Roman Reigns. You can hear the fans’ reactions but for the life of me I don’t know why we need to see Reigns at this point. Thankfully WWE released a slightly edited version of the video which shows the reason the crowd reacted.
Styles lasted nearly half an hour in the match but the bigger story here was the debut itself. This was one of the few dream signings left in the wrestling world and everyone knew what was coming as soon as Styles stepped through the curtain. The crowd knew what was coming and it helped that Styles wound up more than living up to the hype, but it was the entrance that really made it work in the first place.
3. Dean Ambrose Cashes in – Money in the Bank
dThis is one of those ideas that is done too often but when it works, it works to perfection. That’s what we had here as Ambrose became the second Money in the Bank winner ever to cash in on the same night (along with Kane in 2010). It was also a way to tie it back into the previous year when Seth Rollins defeated Ambrose at the exact same show, meaning Ambrose was finally back to even with his former Shield teammate.
The idea of someone cashing in on the same night that they win the Money in the Bank briefcase is something that is teased every single year but almost never winds up happening. Ambrose is the kind of crazy man who fits the idea of cashing in on the same day because you just can’t predict what someone like him is going to do.
The Shield is another important part to this story as Ambrose cashed in on Rollins, who had just won the title from Reigns. In other words, in the span of about five minutes, all three Shield members held the WWE World Title. That’s not bad for the same night and is something that is almost never going to be topped.
4. Goldberg Squashes Brock Lesnar – Survivor Series
Over a month has passed since this one happened and I’m still not sure what to think about it. Goldberg defeated Lesnar in less than ninety seconds, handing Lesnar his first pinfall loss in over three years. It was an old school Goldberg squash and I don’t think that’s what anyone expected. This is one of those things where there are going to be different opinions on it no matter what but it was certainly something that got people talking.
Lesnar had been the most dominant force in wrestling for a very long time and he just loses in less than a minute and a half. While some people could have seen Goldberg winning the match, the idea that the match would actually happen this way was borderline unthinkable. I remember it flashing in my mind as soon as the first spear hit but then it immediately left my head. By the time I knew what had happened, Goldberg’s music was playing again.
This is something that is a once in a generation idea but it certainly worked at the time. I’m almost sure we’ll see them fight again in a much longer match but there’s almost no way it’s going to live up to this one. I still don’t think it was the right call and would have had someone actually on the regular roster be the one to take down Goldberg but I will certainly never forget this one or how much I lost my mind as soon as the match ended.
5. Shane McMahon Returns – Monday Night Raw – February 22
Now this one is all shock value because everything after it was kind of a mess. McMahon hadn’t been seen since 2009 and he was one of the last names you would ever expect to actually show up again. Depending on who you believe, this was the replacement for an injured John Cena as McMahon would go on to face the Undertaker at “Wrestlemania XXXII”.
So in other words, we had not only a huge return but the returning star now has a big match set up. It’s a rare moment where the fans were somewhat worried about who might be coming through the curtain but no one expected it to actually be McMahon himself. Despite being in his mid-40s, the fans ate up the idea that he was back and standing up to his father for everyone else.
Watching all the WWE wrestling offered every single week often numbs you to surprises because either A, you’ve heard the rumors in advance or B, you can pretty much guess what’s going to happen. This was a rare instance where the necessity met the surprise and everything wound up working as well as it could have. That doesn’t happen often and it’s one of the best moments of the year.
6. Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte Main Event “Hell in a Cell 2016” – Hell in a Cell
This is one that really could have been a double entry as the fact that the women were even inside the Cell in the first place was historic enough. However, as soon as Rollins and Kevin Owens started their match, it was clear that we were in for something that had never been seen before in wrestling: women main eventing a major pay per view event.
As has been the case with so many of the milestones involved in the women’s revolution, this is something where you have to consider where things were just a few years ago. A few years back, it was reasonable to expect the women to get five minutes on a pay per view if they were lucky that month. The idea of the match being even remotely entertaining on top of that was just a bonus.
The match was immaterial compared to the fact that it was taking place though. What should have been a pretty nothing card wound up being something that had been built up for the last year plus and was finally being paid off by what was little more than a pipe dream beforehand. Banks and Charlotte are the first women to ever do something like this and hopefully they won’t be the last. It happened once though and that’s what makes it matter.
7. Shane McMahon’s Cell Dive – Wrestlemania XXXII
It’s rare to have a moment that works both as an homage to a more famous moment and as a moment all on its own. While a lot of people (myself certainly included) weren’t happy with Shane being on the show in such a high profile match, it’s safe to say that this made up for a little bit of it.
With nothing else working against the Undertaker (because Shane McMahon needed to get in offense on the Undertaker), Shane knocked him onto the announcers’ table, climbed the Cell, and dropped a huge elbow….which completely missed as Undertaker moved away. Ignoring what looked to be a crash pad underneath the table (thank goodness), this was one of the scariest bumps in years around WWE.
This was one of those moments that just worked based on what it was. He flew off the Cell and crashed through a table in a moment that doesn’t quite rival Foley but at least it was one heck of a memorable moment. Shane is always good for some excitement and that’s what we got here, assuming you can ignore the fact that this was what Undertaker was doing at Wrestlemania.
8. AJ Styles Wins the WWE Championship
One more AJ moment because this was his year. A few years back, who would have thought this could actually happen? Styles was stuck in TNA, clearly miles ahead of most of the roster but that pesky loyalty of his kept him from jumping to WWE and left him stuck there, dealing with whatever nonsense Dixie Carter approved that usually involved her being on TV in prominent positions.
Now flash forward to September when Styles beats Dean Ambrose and becomes the Smackdown World Champion, which is the title carrying the original WWE Championship lineage. That happened and it happened on a WWE pay per view. The fact that he debuted just a few months earlier and was rocketed up the card is amazing enough and, as expected, the match was great.
Styles is someone who had some very high expectations coming in to WWE and at least he lived up to so many of them. FINALLY seeing him reach this level in America was worth the wait and the fact that he’s been one of the best wrestlers in the world on the biggest stage makes things all the better.
For the first time this year, I’m really not sure which one to pick. Is it the moment that shocked almost everyone watching or the moment that is going to mean something in the history books? Honestly this is a very hard one to go for and I could see it going either way, which isn’t often the case.
However, there’s one thing that makes my decision for me: the feelings that came with the moment. Based on that, I have to go with Goldberg squashing Lesnar. That match had my head spinning for a good while after it was over and that doesn’t happen to me very often. It made me want to see what was happening next while leaving me a combination of excited and upset at the same time. It’s rare to have emotion like that in wrestling today and it makes all the difference in the world.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at: