Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2017 (2018 Redo): Remember The Bunch Of Lama Alamo Jokes

Royal Rumble 2017
Date: January 29, 2017
Location: Alamodome, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 52,020
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

The aisle is crazy long and would require a cart to bring some of the wrestlers to the ring during the Rumble. There’s something cool about that, on both fronts actually.

Kickoff Show: Naomi/Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss/Mickie James/Natalya

Nikki and Natalya start things off with Natalya doing You Can’t See Me. That means a slap to the face and there are so few people being so quiet that you can hear what the women are saying. Bliss comes in and gets caught with a facebuster for two. It’s off to Naomi for half of a double dropkick with Nikki’s part not even coming close. Nikki and company hit a triple suplex to send them outside, followed by a dive from Naomi as we take a break.

Back with Becky clotheslining Natalya and hitting a running forearm in the corner. They head outside with Mickie getting in a cheap shot to drop Becky, allowing Natalya to snap a suplex to really take over. Back in and Becky gets driven into the corner again, allowing Bliss to choke a bit. Mickie adds a hard kick to the face as the announcers argue over whether or not cheating is smart.

A Michinoku Driver plants Becky but Natalya can’t get Suplex City (Her words. Well Lesnar’s words, though JR said it about thirteen years earlier.). Instead it’s a double clothesline so Naomi can come in and clean house. The still dumb looking dancing kicks drop Bliss as everything breaks down. A kick to the head sets up the split legged moonsault to give Naomi the pin on Bliss at 9:39.

Rating: C-. The lack of a crowd either in their seats or really interested in this one hurt it a lot but the work wasn’t terrible. The women’s division had gotten so much better by this point that you could trust them to go out and have a match like this, though the stories need to be stronger. I’m really having an issue caring about Nikki never getting to marry her dream husband and complete her fairy tale story but I’m not exactly the target audience.*

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending and there are two referees due to some screwy finishes as of late. The crowd is MUCH better now, making the place look like there’s an actual audience for the show. Cesaro dropkicks Anderson at the bell for two and a gutwrench suplex gets the same less than thirty seconds in.

Gallows loads up a cheap shot from the apron but the second referee catches him, making the gimmick actually work. Sheamus grabs a Regal Roll into Cesaro’s jumping double stomp for two more but Anderson is back up with a kick to the face to take over. It’s off to Gallows, who is quickly kicked down so the champs can take him into the corner. This has been mostly one sided so far but Gallows gets in a backdrop for a breather. Not that the fans seem to care for the most part though.

A big boot knocks Sheamus off the apron and we take a break. Back (after the commercial has been cut from the Network) with Cesaro suplexing Gallows and rolling over to bring Sheamus back in. The ten forearms to the chest have Gallows in trouble and a top rope clothesline gets two. Super White Noise gets the same but Gallows shoves Sheamus away and makes the hot tag to Anderson.

The second referee won’t allow some cheating so Swiss Death gives Cesaro two. A 619 and a high crossbody give him the same but Anderson kicks him down again. Sheamus breaks up the Magic Killer and a referee eats a Brogue Kick. The second referee comes in to see Cesaro put Anderson in the Sharpshooter, only to have Gallows break it up with a kick to the face. Everything breaks down again and it’s a Magic Killer for Sheamus, followed by a rollup with tights to pin Cesaro at 10:28.

Rating: C+. Nice power fight here with both teams hitting each other rather hard. That’s all this needed to be, though I could go for adding a different style in there. Power vs. power isn’t going to work all that well in the long term but at least they had a good match here. These title changes didn’t really matter though as it was all going to change when the Hardys came back. No one knew that yet though and at least we had something good here.

Kickoff Show: Nia Jax vs. Sasha Banks

Nia injured her a month or so ago and tonight is about revenge. Sasha doesn’t have her knee brace on as Nia drives her into the ropes and easily shoves off a headlock. A rope walk springboard goes just as badly as Banks can’t get anything going early on. Jax runs her over and we take an early break.

Back with Sasha trying a standing Bank Statement and having it broken up with ease. Jax grabs a Brock Lock and swings Banks around until a rope can be grabbed. Sasha finally avoids a charge to send Jax into the post, followed by the top rope double knees for two. Sasha comes up holding her knee though and the pop up Samoan drop puts her away at 5:13.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash and really only served to keep Nia around. Banks is going to be fine after a loss like this while Nia still doesn’t have the big defining win (which would still be the case a year later). There was no need for this to be on pay per view though and it could have easily been done on Raw. That’s never a good sign.

And now, a nearly four hour show. I know I say this a lot but I’m almost gassed just watching that Kickoff Show. There’s really no need to do it this way, especially when you have the horrible empty stadium for the first match.

Completely standard opening video, though they do play in the cool “Remember the Rumble” tagline to show off a lot of the famous clips. If there’s one thing WWE does well, it’s look back at their own history. The rest of the matches get some time as well with each one having something to remember as well.

Raw Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and still has never lost a singles match on pay per view. Bayley gets wrestled down to start as Charlotte grabs a front facelock. The fans seem split here despite giving Bayley a heck of a reaction on her entrance. Charlotte heads outside for no apparent reason, allowing Bayley to grab her by the hair and snap her over the middle rope (basically a Stunner) to take over. A headscissors gets two and it’s already time to hit the stalling.

Bayley makes the mistake of going outside and gets kicked into the steps as she doesn’t have much of an answer for Charlotte’s power game. Back in and Charlotte slams Bayley’s face into the mat a few times but makes sure to throw in a quick pose (that’s the Flair in her). We hit the chinlock with Charlotte’s hair falling over Bayley’s face, giving us a rather odd visual of Bayley as a blonde. A knee drop gets two on Bayley and Charlotte is getting annoyed at Bayley sticking around.

Yet another kickout off a neckbreaker makes the frustration even worse so Charlotte does her figure four necklock into the face plants on the mat. The flips to send Bayley back first into the mat make it even worse as Charlotte is completely dominant so far. Charlotte stops to mock Bayley though and a heck of a slap cuts the champ off. A battle of the chops goes to Charlotte (well duh) but Bayley bounces out of the corner with an armdrag. A springboard crossbody (with a few too many bounces) drops Charlotte again and a jumping spinning Downward Spiral (not bad) does it again.

The top rope elbow (which looked awesome on impact) gets a very close two and you can feel the crowd breathe on the kickout. Charlotte (who might be bleeding from the mouth) kicks the knee out though and the Figure Four goes on. The referee catches her grabbing the ropes though and both women are down. Charlotte is up first but her moonsault only grazes knees to give Bayley two. Bayley goes up but gets shoved off to the floor in a heap. As she gets back in, Natural Selection onto the apron retains the title at 13:01.

Rating: B-. Bayley was fighting here but came up short, which is exactly how her character needs to go. For some reason WWE didn’t quite get this and instead put the title on her two weeks later in a nothing Raw match, ignoring the idea of building her up as an underdog. Charlotte was her usual awesome self here and that makes for a fun match, though the future didn’t go the way it should have. At least the first match was solid though.

The shark cage is lowered. This might require an explanation.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Roman Reigns had come close to taking the title from Kevin Owens but Chris Jericho interfered to cost Reigns the match. Therefore it’s time for a rematch with Jericho in a one man cage (the shark cage) above the ring. Jericho is of course scared of heights so this should be fun. It would be a better idea if they hadn’t done it in NXT not too long before this.

Raw World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is defending and this is No DQ. Jericho takes his sweet time getting into the cage (as he should) and is still not in even when Reigns comes out. The Canadians try some double teaming and knock Reigns into the cage all, only to have Reigns fight them off (and the fans are really, REALLY not pleased) and send Jericho into the cage to get us going. The cage is raised like a sexy pinata (Jericho’s very accurate term for himself) and Owens jumps Reigns from behind.

They waste no time in fighting out to the floor and then into the crowd with Reigns hitting him in the ribs with a metal stand. Back to ringside with Owens being bounced off the German announcers’ table but coming back with a whip into the steps. Owens pulls six chairs from underneath the ring and sets up four at ringside, two by two. A monitor shot to the ribs sets up the Cannonball against the barricade and Owens continues to be over like free beer in a frat house.

With Reigns down, Owens sets up two more chairs on top of the four he already had. One more is placed on top but of course the powerbomb and suplex attempts don’t work to prevent a broken back. Back in and Reigns sends him shoulder first into the post before loading up a table. That’s enough to make the fans cheer Reigns (I’m as shocked as you are) but a Backstabber gives Owens two.

Another Cannonball, with Owens mocking Reigns’ spear pose, is countered into a powerbomb. The apron dropkick rocks the champ again as this has been better than I was expecting so far. They’re beating each other up quite well and it’s pretty entertaining, despite Jericho being a non-factor so far. They head outside with Reigns getting superkicked onto a table, setting up a frog splash from the top to the floor in a big crash.

That’s only good for two (well duh) so Owens dedicates a chair shot to Jericho and gets another near fall. A chair is wedged into the corner because wrestlers never learn a thing. Owens scores with a superkick and manages to send Reigns into the chair as I’m not sure what to think. It’s not like that’s never worked before but it’s about as rare as Jericho eating crab cakes and goat’s milk.

With that not working, Jericho tosses Owens some brass knuckles but Reigns blocks the Superman Punch. Roman’s Superman Punch gets two and a Samoan drop through the chair is good for the same. You would think being driven THROUGH A CHAIR would be a big time match but since this is modern wrestling, something that big is now just a regular move. It’s the price you pay for all the big spots and violence.

Roman puts another table in the corner before another Superman Punch gets two. A spear is countered into a Stunner of all things but Reigns kicks out again. We continue the Austin homage with a mudhole stomping and a Cannonball (not so much Austin) as Owens is getting frustrated. That makes him do something dumb, like trying a superplex through that pile of chairs.

Reigns breaks that up and Superman Punches Owens through the pile instead for a very loud crash. A powerbomb puts Reigns through the announcers’ table but here’s Braun Strowman to beat the heck out of Reigns. Roman is sent into the post, followed by the running powerslam through the table in the corner to retain Owens’ title at 23:27.

Rating: B+. This was better than I was expecting and while it feels like a similar ending to Randy Orton vs. John Cena from Royal Rumble 2015, it’s still a good way to keep the title on Owens for the time being. They had a very good power brawl and Owens retaining is the right move, especially with the feud with Strowman getting a big boost. Jericho was barely a factor and that’s a good thing given that they were about to split in the near future.

To really fill in time, we’re doing a countdown of the thirty greatest moments in Rumble history, starting with 30-16 (or 30-15 as Cole puts it). Well kind of as the list is actually 30 facts, which is kind of Rumble By The Numbers.

30. Bret Hart was the first entrant

29. 870 people have entered

28. 3 women have entered and each has eliminated at least one man

27. 23 people have won, meaning 98% of the entrants are losers

26. 4 Rumbles have been in Texas

25. California and Florida have held 5 Rumbles each

24. 507,102 fans have seen the Rumble

23. Rey Mysterio lasted longer than anyone ever at 1:02:12

22. Edge won the Rumble in 7:37

21. Santino Marella was eliminated in 1 second

20. The longest time in a single Rumble without winning is Bob Backlund with 1:01:10

19. HHH has spent the most time in the Rumble with 4:06:08.

18. 46 Hall of Famers have competed

17. 9 Hall of Famers have won

16. Mick Foley entered the Rumble 3 times in 1998

Raw boss Stephanie McMahon mocks Raw underling Mick for Strowman interfering when Smackdown bosses Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan come in. They roll the tumbler so Sami Zayn can come in and pick his number, which of course takes some time. Before Sami can open his ball, Dean Ambrose comes in searching for churros. He gets a number but is off to take a nap until he’s due in the Rumble. After going to a crowd shot of watching this in the arena (erg), Sami gets #8.

Austin Aries joins commentary for the Cruiserweight Title match.

We recap Rich Swann vs. Neville. Swann is the Cruiserweight Champion but Neville has declared himself the King of the Cruiserweights. That’s completely accurate and it’s time for Swann to take a heck of a beating and give up a title that doesn’t belong to him. This is about as obvious of an ending as you’re going to get. They throw in some history between the two with Neville mentoring Swann both in Japan and here in America. That’s better than nothing and more than I would expect from a match like this, even if Neville winning is pretty much guaranteed.

Cruiserweight Title: Neville vs. Rich Swann

Neville is challenging and stops himself from doing his usual entrance because the fans don’t deserve it. That’s a nice touch and makes him feel different instead of the same guy who just happens to be a villain now. Feeling out process to start until Swann flips over Neville and misses a dropkick.

Neville gets sent outside for a dive but is fine enough to drive Swann right into the corner. A missile dropkick sets up a jackknife cover for two and Neville stands on Swann’s head. Neville wants to know if this is it and gets crucifixed for two. Back up and Neville forearms the heck out of Swann for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. The comeback is enough to have Neville take him outside for some whips into the barricade.

Back in and Neville comes up the top, diving straight into a superkick to the jaw. That one looked awesome and both guys are down. Another kick to the jaw and a super hurricanrana sets up a Phoenix flip dive to the floor to put Neville in trouble. They head back inside with Swann hammering away before getting two off something like a Warrior splash.

Neville isn’t down enough that he can’t crotch Swann on top. He also can’t hit the superplex but settles for a hard superkick to stagger the champ. Rich’s spinning kick to the head gets two as Neville gets his foot on the ropes. Swann again takes too long to get up top, allowing Neville to superplex him into the Rings of Saturn for the tap to make Neville champion at 13:29.

Rating: B-. They were beating the heck out of each other in a better than average match. Instead of having Neville squash him in relatively short order, Swann got in some offense, only to eventually not be good enough to overcome the King of the Cruiserweights. This was entertaining, but Neville is going to need some better challengers.

We recap AJ Styles vs. John Cena. Styles defeated Cena twice in a row last year, including with one clean pinfall. Then Cena said he wanted to challenge the champion at the Rumble and since he’s John Cena and one title shy of tying Ric Flair’s record, the match was made.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging and has the black shorts on here so you know it’s a big night. AJ scores with a kick to the leg so Cena clotheslines him to the apron. Cena gets in a few right hands but charges into a boot in the corner to let AJ take over. Back to back knee drops have Cena in trouble but AJ stops to yell at the crowd. A third knee, this time with a You Can’t See Me, misses and Cena is right back with a backdrop.

AJ sticks the landing on an AA though and there’s an enziguri to put Cena down again. There’s a hurricanrana and Cena doesn’t seem to know what to do with Styles. The running seated forearm gives AJ two more but Cena punches him in the face. The Shuffle is broken up though and AJ grabs a wheelbarrow facebuster to put Cena down again. AJ hits the Phenomenal Blitz, only to have Cena hit that hard running clothesline for a breather that he uses when he needs a breather.

Now the Shuffle connects but it’s way too early for the AA. AJ grabs a torture rack into a spinning powerbomb for two more and we get a bit of a pause. They’re doing a good job here of going with the slower pace to build things up here, which is exactly what they should be doing.

The Phenomenal Forearm misses and it’s an AA for two. Another hard running clothesline gives Cena two more but he charges into a Pele to the shoulder. Now the Forearm connects for two more as they’re even in the near falls off the finishers. AJ starts firing off the hard kicks to the chest and Cena doesn’t seem like he’s breathing very well. One too many kicks earns him an electric chair into a faceplant though and Cena is right back into it.

They slug it out with JBL describing AJ as blocking every punch with his face. Apparently that’s fine enough to reverse a right hand into the Calf Crusher but of course Cena reverses into the STF to a nice round of applause. At least they respect some wrestling abilities. Somehow AJ reverses that into an STF of his own but Cena powers to his feet. Instead of an AA though, it’s off to a Figure Four on the champ (because we must praise Flair, though it’s appropriate here).

AJ pulls himself up though and tries a cross armbreaker, which of course is countered into a powerbomb for two. Cena goes up top for the Fameasser but gets powerbombed out of the air. Now the Styles Clash is good for two as the fans are feeling the near falls (as they should with the match picking WAY up in a hurry). Code Red gives Cena two more, followed by AJ’s fireman’s carry backbreaker for the same.

Something like a swinging Big Ending (called a cutter by Mauro) gives Cena two more so it’s time for the big guns. Cena busts out the super AA…….for two. You can see the look of disbelief on Cena’s face and now the fans aren’t sure what to think. The Styles Clash gives AJ his own near fall but Cena counters the Phenomenal Forearm into back to back AA’s for the pin and the title at 24:01.

Rating: A. This took its time to build up and it’s one of the best matches of 2017. Cena using raw power to start but eventually learning what AJ was going to throw at him and adapting made for a great story. He couldn’t win with the mega power move either, eventually having to counter AJ to beat him. That builds on their previous matches and it’s a classic match as a result.

Cena celebrates. JBL: “Man that was good!” Yeah pretty much. Cena heads into the crowd and hands the title to a Make-A-Wish kid because he’s that awesome.

We look at Seth Rollins invading Takeover: San Antonio to call out HHH, who cost him his spot in the Rumble. HHH said Rollins needs to be careful what he wished for. Worry not though as STEPHANIE will be on Raw tomorrow night to deal with Rollins. I’d be terrified too.

Jerry Lawler comes out for commentary on the Rumble.

Back to the Rumble by the Numbers.

15. Only 16 of the 30 possible numbers have won

14. 7 winners are from 1-10

13. 4 have been from 11-20

12. 19 have been from 21-40

11. 27 is the lucky number

10. 1 and 2 have produced 4 winners

9. 1 and 2 have been the final two entrants twice (1995 and 1999)

8. Only one person has won from the same number twice (Batista at #28)

7. Kane has entered the most Royal Rumbles

6. Kane has the most career eliminations

5. Roman Reigns has the most eliminations in one match

4. The World Title has been on the line twice

3. Three men have been runner up twice (Cena, Big Show, HHH)

2. Five men have won twice (Cena, HHH, Hogan, Shawn Michaels, Batista)

1. Only Steve Austin has won three Rumbles

Royal Rumble

Two minutes intervals and it’s Big Cass in at #1, meaning Enzo Amore gets to do the full entrance. We’re just that lucky I guess but the fans are still eating it up at this point. Since everything is bigger in Texas, it would make sense for Big Cass to win here tonight. We hear about some of the bigger names but Cass is going to toss all of them out because Cass is like HBK in 1995. Chris Jericho is in at #2 as his bad luck in the Rumble draws continue (this is his third time as #2).

Cass tosses him down with a fall away slam but an early Empire Elbow misses. The Walls are broken up and it’s Kalisto in at #3 after only ninety seconds. A springboard dropkick staggers Cass and a regular one drops Jericho. Cass can’t powerslam Kalisto and it’s some kicks to cut Cass down again. Mojo Rawley is in at #4 as we’re not even three minutes and fifteen seconds in yet. Corey: “Smackdown Live’s resident blithering idiot.” Lawler: “That’s an insult to blithering idiots”.

Cass takes Rawley into the corner while the other two are down on the apron. Jericho breaks four hours in the Rumble to give him the all time record as Jack Gallagher is in at #5. The length of the aisle really becomes an issue here as Jack takes forever to get to the ring. Once there though he cleans house with the umbrella, including a low blow to a posing Jericho. One heck of a toss sends Kalisto to the mat and it’s Mark Henry in at #6.

Everyone is down when his music hits but Gallagher has enough time to get up and stomp on Jericho by the time he gets there. Gallagher’s headbutt just annoys Mark so he tosses Jack through the ropes (not an elimination). Jack does his Mary Poppins dive with the umbrella and is promptly eliminated. Braun Strowman is in at #7, taking twenty five seconds from the start of his music to get to the ring. Jericho hides on the floor (Jericho: “HE’S HUGE!”) as Strowman gets rid of Mojo, Cass, Kalisto and Henry, the latter after a battle of the giants.

Sami Zayn is in at #8 and is stupid enough to charge into the ring and slug away as fast as he can. Sami stops a charge with a boot but tries a suplex for some reason. Strowman misses a charge into the post but comes right back with a running splash in the corner as Big Show is #9 (to a VERY strong reaction, oddly enough).

We get the big, long walk to the ring where Sami is down in the corner and Jericho is still on the floor. Strowman clotheslines Show down without much effort but a chokeslam cuts him down. Jericho picks now to come back in and is promptly punched down, leaving the giants to lift each other up for failed slam attempts. Strowman manages to muscle Show out though and is the only one standing. The debuting Tye Dillinger is #10 (in the perfect (ten) entrance), giving us Jericho, Strowman, Zayn and Dillinger. Tye goes straight at Strowman with forearms and left hands as Sami gets up to help him slug away at the giant.

They get suplexed down without much effort though and it’s James Ellsworth in at #11. He and Carmella run to the ring (in a relationship that was never explained) but don’t get in, allowing Tye and Sami to pull Strowman to the apron. Dean Ambrose is in at #12 and tricks Ellsworth into charging in on his own where Strowman eliminates him in all of ten seconds. That’s better than I was expecting. Dean gets in but can’t do much with Strowman (well duh) but Tye and Sami get back up to help Dean out. That earns them all running clotheslines in the corner and it’s Baron Corbin in at #13.

That means four on one on Strowman, who shrugs them all away. Strowman dumps Tye but Sami grabs him by the beard for a breather. A Helluva Kick rocks Strowman and Corbin gets rid of the monster after a star making performance. Dean hits a quick Dirty Deeds on Corbin but doesn’t try to eliminate him. Dean never was the smartest guy in the world.

Kofi Kingston is in at #14 and the countdown is on to the cool save. Kofi gets knocked into the ropes and Corbin does his slide underneath the ropes into a clothesline on Dean. The Miz is in at #15 (thankfully with Maryse), giving us Jericho (STILL on the floor), Sami, Ambrose, Corbin and Miz at the moment.

A Skull Crushing Finale drops Dean but Miz doesn’t go for the elimination. Deep Six cuts Miz off as the crowd oddly dies for a bit. For no logical reason, Kofi climbs to the top of the post but gets knocked down onto his chest. He still manages to hang on though and scores with Trouble in Paradise on Corbin. Sheamus is in at #16 and it’s time for some powerslams. Miz backs away from Sheamus but gets caught in the ten forearms to the chest. Jericho gets back up and is promptly Brogue Kicked down.

Big E. is in at #17 and it’s a quick abdominal stretch on Miz, allowing for some spanking. If that’s what he’s into I guess. The ring is getting too full and Rusev (with a broken nose) makes it even worse at #18. Right hands have Dean in trouble but no one is seriously close to being eliminated.

Sheamus gets in a hard knee on Miz and it’s Cesaro in at #19. It’s an early Swing to Miz and a second to Sami. Jerry: “Use him as a weapon!” Ambrose and Kofi are swung as well, followed by Big E. and Corbin but Rusev saves Sheamus from the same fate for some reason. You might notice a lot of names being swung and that’s because there are WAY too many people in the ring.

Xavier Woods is in at #20, giving us Jericho, Zayn, Ambrose, Corbin, Kingston, Miz, Sheamus, Big E. Rusev, Cesaro and Woods. We’re two thirds of the way into the match and over half of the people are still in. New Day beats Sheamus up and Woods has to save Kofi from an elimination at Miz’s hands. A pair of boots rock Miz but he’s not going anywhere yet. Bray Wyatt, with the lights going out, is in at #21 and the Fireflies coming out during the match is a cool visual.

Miz gets the release Rock Bottom and house is cleaned until Woods stares Wyatt down in a call back to Woods being terrified of Bray. Woods is sent to the apron and Kofi is put there next to him. Big E. saves his buddies from Cesaro and Sheamus as Apollo Crews is in at #22. Crews’ standing moonsault hits Miz as this is looking like a regular battle royal rather than the Rumble. Big E. pulls Woods and Kofi back inside but Sheamus and Cesaro get rid of all three of them at once to let the ring breathe a bit. Sheamus tries to dump Cesaro but Jericho runs in to get rid of both of them. Well the ring is certainly emptier in a hurry.

Randy Orton (of the Wyatt Family because reasons) is in at #23 with a quick RKO to Corbin and Rusev. Sami goes up top for some reason and dives right into another RKO. Dolph Ziggler is in at #24 and superkicks abound. The fans are begging for Goldberg to come in and get rid of some of these people but have to settle for Luke Harper at #25. We have five spots left and Goldberg, Undertaker and Brock Lesnar still to go. Harper gets rid of Crews but stops for a staredown with Orton. Wyatt has to play peacekeeper until Harper clotheslines Bray down. Orton breaks up Sister Abigail on Bray with an RKO as the ring is too full again.

Brock Lesnar is in at #26 and now we can get rid of some people. Ziggler and Ambrose are tossed with ease and it’s Suplex/F5 City. Everyone is down and the fans want Goldberg at #27. Instead it’s Enzo Amore in at #27 and I’ll let you figure out what happens. Graves: “THIS MAY BE THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE!!!” Brock throws some suplexes until Goldberg is in at #28 for the big showdown. A spear and a clothesline get rid of Lesnar in all of fifteen seconds, stunning both the crowd and commentary at once. Sami eats a Jackhammer and Orton/Wyatt take a double spear.

Goldberg is the only man standing and it’s Undertaker in at #29 to a ROAR. Thankfully he appears in the ring instead of doing the ridiculously long walk down the ramp. Cole: “THIS IS A MOMENT!” Well those are what matter more than anything else. Corbin and Rusev break up the showdown and are promptly eliminated. A spear takes Undertaker down but Goldberg turns his attention to eliminate Harper, allowing Undertaker to dump him. Undertaker chokeslams a few people and it’s Roman Reigns at #30 (imagine the booing) to give us Jericho, Sami, Miz, Wyatt, Orton, Undertaker and Reigns.

That means another staredown and Reigns wins the slugout. The fans are LIVID and call this BS until Undertaker stops the Superman Punch with a chokeslam. Undertaker dumps Miz and Zayn like they’re nothing but takes too long calling for a Tombstone, allowing Reigns to dump him. That earns Reigns a glare to set up the Wrestlemania main event.

Jericho is dead so Reigns tosses him without much effort, giving Jericho the most meaningless hour run in Rumble history. Reigns is left alone with Orton and Wyatt with the double teaming starting in short order. The hanging DDT plants Reigns but Superman Punches get Roman out of trouble. Wyatt is eliminated but it’s an RKO and a clothesline to send Orton to Wrestlemania at 1:02:08.

Rating: D. And that’s being pretty generous. There are tons of problems here, but we’ll start with all the midcarders who were around forever and did nothing. Here are some of the people who weren’t going to win but were in the match for at least twenty minutes each:

Sami Zayn (47:12)

Dean Ambrose (26:55)

Baron Corbin (32:39)

Miz (32:44)

Rusev (22:31)

Those five names combined for one elimination. That’s a crazy amount of time to basically do nothing. If they’re not going to be factors (and none of them were as they were almost all glorified cannon fodder), don’t leave them out there go clog up the ring. It doesn’t do Sami any good to be out there for forty five minutes and do nothing, just like it doesn’t help Miz to be there for half an hour so people can beat on him. Jericho was a potential winner and stayed in there over an hour (spending a lot of it on the floor) but what good is an hour stay if he’s tossed out like he’s nothing after a mere two eliminations?

That brings us to the second problem: the three big names. This match was built around Goldberg, Brock Lesnar and Undertaker (the three of them and Cena are dead center on the post) and they combined to get rid of TEN people (over a third of the eliminations) despite being in the match for less time combined than any of the five names mentioned above. None of them made the final four but they cleared the way for the grouping. That’s some really bad planning and a lack of drama, especially when it makes everyone left look life afterthoughts. Let one of them be there as a dragon for the winner to slay at the very least.

Throw in a lack of meaningful surprises (Reigns was the only name of value not announced in advance) and no nostalgia to be seen (but we needed Apollo Crews and Dolph Ziggler to combine for ten minutes in the ring and not get rid of anyone) and there was very little to care about for the biggest part of the Rumble. Strowman stuff was fun, but after him there was a FIFTEEN MINUTE stretch with no eliminations. This was a terribly planned out Rumble and managed to turn one of the most entertaining matches of the year into something incredibly boring.

Overall Rating: C+. It says a lot when the Royal Rumble is the only bad thing on the show. Other than that, the worst match is…..I guess the women’s match? This show was rather awesome but the Rumble itself was such a mess that it brings the rest of the show way down. This was a good show that cold have been great and I have no idea how they thought that was the right idea with the Rumble. That should usually be the most important thing on the show but it felt like something they threw together here, which really misses the point. Fix the Rumble and it’s a classic. As it is, it’s just good.

Ratings Comparison

Naomi/Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss/Mickie James/Natalya

Original: C

Redo: C-

Sheamus and Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Sasha Banks

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Bayley vs. Charlotte Flair

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns

Original: B

Redo: B+

Rich Swann vs. Neville

Original: C+

Redo: B-

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A-

Redo: A

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: C+

That Rumble rating is ridiculous. Most of the rest of the matches are in the same ballpark though and that’s a good thing.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/29/royal-rumble-2017-i-can-go-with-that/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw – January 25, 2021: A Horse, A Haircut And Red Makeup

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 25, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and the big draw this week is the double return of Drew McIntyre and Goldberg. I’m not sure how much of an appeal that is supposed to have but WWE certainly sees something in it. Also we get a rematch from last week with Asuka defending the Women’s Title against Alexa Bliss, because WWE doesn’t like waiting on much. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Drew McIntyre to get things going. Drew is rather emotional to be back here and thanks everyone who sent him well wishes. The virus is a horrible thing but we are going to get through it together. Speaking of things we will get through, this Sunday it is going to be Drew McIntyre vs. Bill Goldberg for the WWE Title. Goldberg was 173-0 in WCW and ran through the Rock like he was nothing….and then he disappeared.

The last thing to go in a heavyweight fighter is his power but Goldberg has started a new streak. Every champion he has challenged since returning to WWE has gone down but on Sunday, Drew is ending the streak. Cue Miz and John Morrison to mock the idea of King Kong vs. Godzilla on Sunday because one of them could wind up injured after the match. That opens a door for a Money in the Bank cash-in because whoever wins is going to be a sitting duck.

Miz promises to win the title but here’s Goldberg to cut them off. Goldberg: “You, me, Sunday, you’re next.” The staredown is on so Miz and Morrison make some jokes from the apron, earning themselves a double beatdown, with Miz taking the spear and Morrison getting Claymored. Another staredown ensues as I beg of WWE to end the Miz thing on Sunday because it is managing to hurt a story that had almost nothing going for it in the first place.

Charlotte says she knows how to perform well under pressure. Tonight she wants Shayna Baszler to bring her invisible crown because it’s one thing to pretend to be a queen and another to actually be one. On Sunday, she is entering the Royal Rumble and defending the Tag Team Titles. As for Lacey Evans and Ric Flair, she has seen her father in some dark places before but this might be the darkest. She’ll be ready though, because she is Ms. Wrestlemania.

Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia Jax is here with Shayna Baszler but Asuka isn’t here because she and Charlotte are the most worthless Tag Team Champions in the history of the title. Charlotte starts fast by kicking Baszler down and hitting a baseball slide on Jax. The Figure Eight goes on in a hurry but Jax comes in for the DQ at 56 seconds. Good, as there is no reason to burn off Charlotte vs. Baszler in a real match here.

Post match the beatdown is on with Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke coming in for the failed save. Lacey Evans is in as well and the six woman is ready for after the break.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke/Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax/Lacey Evans

Mandy and Lacey exchange wristlocks to start before it’s off to Dana to knock Lacey down again. Shayna and Charlotte come in with Shayna kicking away at the leg. That’s enough to send Charlotte over for another tag to Mandy, who takes Baszler into the corner. The alternating beatdown is on with Charlotte kneeing Baszler outside. Charlotte stops to glare at Nia and Lacey but gets rammed into the apron. Shayna throws her back inside….and doesn’t beat the count at 4:44. Everyone seems confused and I can’t imagine that was the planned finish because it just ended out of nowhere.

And never mind as we come back from a break with the match continuing thanks to a decision made by Adam Pearce during the break. Jax runs Brooke over with a clothesline and taking her into the corner. Shayna does the stomp down onto Dana’s arm but Dana gets over for the tag to Mandy anyway. Everything breaks down and Charlotte chases Lacey over the barricade as Dana gets the tag again. Nia misses a charge into the post and Dana gets two off a running flip neckbreaker. A powerbomb into a chokeslam plants Dana again and the legdrop finishes for Nia at 14:05 (counting the break).

Rating: D+. Again. They did it again. One more time, Nia and Shayna beat Dana and Mandy because that’s all these four know how to do. The law of diminishing returns has been in effect for months with these teams but here we are again. Speaking of again, Charlotte and Asuka still might as well not be a team, so hopefully they lose the titles on Sunday and end this worthless idea.

We look at Mace beating Xavier Woods last week.

Mustafa Ali loved what he saw and is ready to destroy Kofi Kingston.

Earlier today, Ali talked about coming after Kofi because he had the greatest moment in his life after Ali had the worst moment of his life.

Xavier Woods vs. Slapjack

Woods charges at him to start but gets kneed down for his efforts. Slapjack bangs up his knee on a missed double stomp though and Woods strikes away. Woods nails a running knee to finish Slapjack for the pin at 2:49.

Post match Retribution beats Woods down, with Ali grabbing a chair. Instead he sits down in it though and says for someone who acts like a king, Woods looks like a peasant right now. Ali has heard that Kofi won’t be competing in the Royal Rumble, but don’t worry because he’ll take Kofi’s place.

Riddle is on his way to the ring when he runs into R-Truth, who has heard about a birthday party. Truth thinks it is for him because it was his birthday last week and they might have 24 karat gold carrots for him. Goat noises are shared.

It’s time for the talk show before a match involving the people in the talk show, this time featuring the Hurt Business in the VIP Lounge. MVP is ready to own the Royal Rumble and tells Cedric Alexander to focus on the task at hand tonight. Bobby Lashley talks about how the team is draped in gold (and silver) and they are just beginning. They have a present for MVP in the form of a THB chain. MVP is rather impressed but Cedric and Shelton argue over the design.

Cue R-Truth to ask about the surprise party, because THB must mean Truth Happy Birthday. Shelton: “Truth, now is not the time.” Truth: “Is it a dance break?” Lashley apologizes for forgetting his birthday last week but he has a gift inside the ring. Here comes the Menagerie of Numskulls to go after the title, with the Hurt Business getting involved. MVP isn’t impressed, but here’s Riddle with the Final Flash to knock him silly. It takes talent to squeeze in two stupid ideas into one segment so well done.

Edge is back tonight. Works for me.

R-Truth asks Adam Pearce if he can enter the Money in the Bank match. AJ Styles and Omos come up with AJ offering his services in a qualifying match. Styles says he’s benevolent, so Truth says he’s a Capricorn. Pearce says if Truth can beat AJ, he’ll consider a Rumble spot. Truth things Omos is a Taurus, like the one he had that broke down one time. Confused Truth is still one of my favorite things in WWE.

We look back at the opening segment.

Sheamus vs. John Morrison

Both are officially in the Rumble and Miz is in Morrison’s corner. Morrison takes him down with a headlock to start but Sheamus is back up with a hammerlock. The chinlock keeps Morrison down until he fights up, only to get backdropped right back down. Morrison gets in a shot to the throat and break dances over for a kick to the back. Sheamus pops up and grabs the Irish Curse for two before heading to the top.

The top rope clothesline is dropkicked out of the air with a shot to the knee, setting up a running knee to put Sheamus on the apron. Back in and Morrison works on the leg with a leg crank and an elbow to the knee. Sheamus uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom, setting up a release Rock Bottom for two more. The Cloverleaf is blocked and it’s a knee to the face to set up White Noise to finish Morrison at 9:33.

Rating: C. As usual, this worked out well and I’m not surprised by this. They’re always good together and that was on display again. It’s a little weird to have the heel as the speed and the face as the power, but they kept Miz to a minimum and let the guys do their thing, which is exactly the right idea.

Post match Miz wants a handicap match so that’s on as well, as we now have a third Miz and Morrison segment in the first two hours.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Sheamus

No tags here as Morrison takes out Sheamus’ knee to start so Miz can get a DDT for two. An enziguri into a clothesline puts Sheamus on the floor, with Morrison nailing a nice dive. Sheamus gets sent hard into the barricade for some running shots to the head. Back in and Miz stomps Sheamus down in the corner but Sheamus manages to send Morrison outside.

A running clothesline drops Miz and there’s a powerslam to the returning Morrison. Sheamus Regal Rolls Miz onto Morrison and then sends them outside for the double top rope clothesline. Morrison breaks up the Brogue Kick back inside but Sheamus shrugs off the Skull Crushing Finale. The Brogue Kick drops Morrison but it’s the Skull Crushing Finale to finish Sheamus at 6:49.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I thought I would have, and as much as I want to put Miz into that briefcase and send him to the planet Flaflooga, Sheamus got into the zone that he rarely reaches anymore and that’s a good thing. He really can do the power thing well and Miz and Morrison work well together in spots like this. Sheamus and Morrison have some very good chemistry together as well so I’m not sure why I’m surprised I had a good time here.

Ric Flair and Lacey Evans grapple a bit when Charlotte comes in. Lacey leaves and Flair says he’s doing what he wants to do. Charlotte says he spent his money on everyone but his family but this isn’t cute anymore. Flair is going from legend to old man and she isn’t the bad guy. Ric glares at her as Lacey comes back in and hits her with the Woman’s Right. Lacey asks Flair to explain the WOO as they leave Charlotte laying.

AJ Styles vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Truth sending him over the top but getting caught in a staredown with Styles. Back in and AJ misses the Phenomenal Forearm, allowing Truth to start up the John Cena finishing sequence. There’s the Shuffle but the AA is countered into the Calf Crusher for the tap at 2:35.

We look back at Randy Orton being all masked and creepy. I think this is just airing the same segment from last week.

And now, Alexa’s Playground with Bliss reciting Mary Mary Quite Contrary. She loves what she and Fiend did to Randy Orton two weeks ago and looks at a video of last week’s promo (which we just saw). Bliss thinks he looks better now and says that she just wanted to have some fun with Asuka in her playground. Now we look at Bliss watching herself and Asuka from last week (after watching her talk on the big screens in the Thunderdome). Bliss throws in some Ring Around The Rosey and her face turns into the Fiend for the LET ME IN. Total time spent on watching recaps: seven minutes.

Riddle vs. Hurt Business

Gauntlet match and if Riddle wins, he gets a title shot at Lashley. Shelton Benjamin starts things off and counters a kick into a spinebuster for two. The chinlock goes on and Shelton adds a knee but gets pulled into a guillotine. Shelton tries to muscle him into a suplex so Riddle knees him in the head. A rollup should have Riddle pinned but Cedric Alexander gets on the apron. Shelton yells at Alexander and gets rolled up for the pin at 4:48. MVP is in next and, as he yells at Shelton and Alexander for arguing, gets pulled into a kneebar for the tap at 5:24. Cedric is in last and we take a break.

Back with Cedric putting a knee in Riddle’s back and cranking on the arm. Riddle fights up so Cedric hits a heck of a dropkick for two. The abdominal stretch goes on but Riddle reverses into a suplex, which is countered into a DDT. Back up and Riddle kicks him in the head to start the real comeback.

A t-bone suplex sends Alexander flying but he gets the knees up to block the Broton. Riddle grabs a German suplex to put Alexander down again, only to get pulled into a brainbuster for two more. A quick triangle choke is countered into a powerbomb but Riddle hangs onto the choke. Back up and Riddle grabs a rollup for the pin at 12:24.

Rating: C. Riddle vs. Shelton and MVP were about as nothing as you could get but Alexander had a good match. That being said, the whole Hurt Business in-fighting stuff is still one of the worst things going on around here as of late. It isn’t that surprising though, as the team is good, polished and feel like a threat so they must be stamped out.

Post match Lashley comes out to give Riddle the Hurt Lock to leave him laying.

The WWE Network is moving to Peacock. If it doesn’t increase the price and you get the same things, I’m good with it.

We look at the opening sequence again.

Edge joins us for the first time in several months to talk about how you aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. Ten years ago, he went to Wrestlemania XXVII and left as champion. Then he lost everything because of his neck and took nine years to get back. He remembers telling his mom that he wanted to be a wrestler and she told him you have to go do it.

With that in mind, he is entering the Royal Rumble. He doesn’t have much time left so he is going to fight with everything he has to make this far fetched dream come true. If you have been with him on this ride until now, you have to try. A world without dreamers and fighters is a much less magical place. He quotes Henry Ford, who said if you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. Edge thinks he can, and he’ll see us at the Royal Rumble.

Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss is challenging in a rematch from last week. Asuka takes her down into an armbar to start but misses the hip attack. Bliss kicks her to the floor….and then gets on the rocking horse that appears in the ring. Back from a break with Bliss fighting out of a chinlock and getting kicked in the face. Asuka hits another kick in the corner but Bliss’ old music starts playing and now she has her regular gear on (and longer hair).

Bliss sends Asuka face first into the corner and then the lights go out, with Bliss going into the other corner. She does Bray Wyatt’s lean backwards and becomes Fiend Bliss. Asuka’s knee to the face just annoys Bliss and the Asuka Lock but Bliss powers out of it. The Mandible Claw goes on but here’s Randy Orton with red makeup because this company doesn’t know how burns work either for an RKO to Bliss and the no contest at 12:33.

Rating: F. I like Randy Orton, I like Alexa Bliss and I like Asuka. If you put all three of those people into a match and angle, I should like the product. Instead, this was like an eight year old on a sugar rush saying “And then this happens and then this happens but it doesn’t count and then this happens and then the show is over.” They had part of a match and then it was something about a horse and a goddess walking into an RKO. I would say I probably got some of the details wrong in there, but I don’t think there were any details involved in the first place.

Overall Rating: D. And yet, somehow it’s better than last week’s show. This show was going along somewhat nicely and then went FLYING off the rails in the end, with one dumb idea after another. Maybe it’s all the time that they have to fill, but the more I think about it, the more worried I am that this is really what they think is the best use of Raw every week. Between the wrestlers working multiple times, the people watching promos from last week and people doing completely stupid things just because the script calls for it, this was another shining example of how bad Raw can be and that’s a scary thought going forward.

Results

Charlotte b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler/Lacey Evans b. Charlotte/Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Legdrop to Brooke

Xavier Woods b. Slapjack – Knee to the face

Sheamus b. John Morrison – White Noise

Miz/John Morrison b. Sheamus – Skull Crushing Finale

AJ Styles b. R-Truth – Calf Crusher

Riddle b. Hurt Business – Rollup to Alexander

Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss went to a no contest

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – January 11, 2021: A Hot Ending To A Sad Coronavirus Anniversary

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

And then everything changed as Drew McIntyre was diagnosed with the Coronavirus, meaning that whatever was planned for this week has been thrown out the window in exchange for something to be named later. We have a few more weeks to go before the Royal Rumble and now they are going to need to have a backup plan just in case. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s HHH to get things going, complete with soaking in the canned cheers Before he can get very far, Randy Orton cuts him off. Orton says the office is here to do what Drew McIntyre couldn’t do. HHH confirms that Orton vs. McIntyre isn’t happening tonight so HHH has two options: make Orton #30 in the Royal Rumble or just hand him the WWE Title right now.

HHH says Orton is only going to be champion if he wins the Royal Rumble. The threats start but HHH doesn’t want to hear them because he’s glad to have the old Randy Orton back. He saw Orton light Bray Wyatt on fire and was never prouder, because he would have done the same thing.

At the same time though, HHH doesn’t understand Orton’s obsession with destroying legends like Big Show, Mark Henry, Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair. Why do it when it doesn’t even benefit you? All that did was take the pride away because it shows that Orton is a no good pr***.

Orton asks if HHH has it in him one more time, but HHH says no because there is no benefit to him. Before HHH leaves, Orton asks if that is because Stephanie isn’t here tonight so HHH can’t get his testicular fortitude out of her purse. A right hand puts Orton on the floor and he smiles, saying that must be a yes. HHH whispering a lot aside, this worked fine enough as a way to set up a makeshift main event.

We look back at Ric Flair costing Charlotte a tag match last week.

Charlotte doesn’t want to talk about Ric, because Lacey Evans isn’t the first or last woman to hit on him. She doesn’t understand why we’re talking about her dad when she is about to wrestle a match in 2021, meaning it’s time to go to the ring.

Lacey Evans says Charlotte needs to have a sweet tea on the front porch. Ric Flair liked the flirting last week and Lacey could go for that kind of sugar. She dedicates the match to Ric and blows him a kiss, complete with a bit of swooning.

Drew McIntyre joins us via video and says that it’s true he has been diagnosed with Coronavirus. He’s one of the people with no symptoms, but if he can get it, anyone can. So wear your masks and practice social distancing, and he’ll be back really soon. Has anyone in WWE officially announced a positive diagnoses on TV before this?

Charlotte vs. Lacey Evans

Charlotte knocks her down to start as commentary shifts into Royal Rumble hype. The Figure Four Necklock goes on with Lacey’s face being rammed into the mat and then Charlotte rolls her over a few times. Charlotte takes it into the corner to crash down onto the knee but Lacey bails to the floor. Cue Ric Flair, who is looking rather happy, as we take a break.

Back with Charlotte hitting some shoulders in the corner but Lacey knocks her down, throws in a strut, and drives Charlotte’s head into the mat. Charlotte fights back up and hits a clothesline into the neckbreaker. Lacey gets booted in the face and Natural Selection connects, but Flair puts the boot on the rope. Flair says he isn’t home and he’s not staying home before tripping Charlotte on a suplex attempt. He even holds the leg down so Lacey can get the pin at 12:24.

Rating: D+. This is another case where you kind of have to wonder who this is being booked for. Is it just that Flair was bored at home and wanted something to do? I only ask because this isn’t exactly boosting Charlotte and while it might help Lacey a bit, there are how many people sitting at home while Flair gets ANOTHER story? It doesn’t help that Charlotte was mostly destroying her until the finish, but Lacey did need the win.

Post break Lacey and Ric head to the hotel.

We look at Drew McIntyre retaining the WWE Title over Keith Lee last week.

Sheamus compliments Lee on his effort last week but Lee doesn’t want to hear it. Cue Miz and Morrison to brag about the briefcase so Sheamus calls them Dumb and Dumber. The match is made for later as Miz and Morrison remind me more of Bulk and Skull every week.

Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

Actually hang on as Elias says he got hurt in the recording studio, so Jaxson Ryker is taking his place.

Jeff Hardy vs. Jaxson Ryker

Ryker says Elias uses his music to create, but Ryker is going to destroy. Jeff gets stomped in the corner but avoids a charge. The Twist of Fate (swinging neckbreaker in this case) connects but Elias offers a distraction so Ryker can grab a rollup with pants for the pin at 48 seconds.

Post match Hardy tells Elias to bring it so Elias tells Ryker not to interfere.

Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

Joined in progress with Hardy kneeing him down but having the Twist of Fate broken up. The Whisper in the Wind gives Hardy two but Elias’ jumping knee into a swinging neckbreaker gets the same. Hardy is back up with the Twist of Fate and the Swanton connects for the pin at 3:56.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here as they already seem to be planting seeds for Elias and Ryker’s split. To be fair, it has been like a month or so already and that’s enough time for such a partnership. Hardy wrestling two matches (a stretch but true) in a row makes a bit more sense now, even if they’re to the split this soon.

We look at Orton/HHH again.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Keith Lee/Sheamus

Morrison’s headlock doesn’t work on Sheamus, who takes him down with a drop toehold. Lee comes in to work on Morrison’s arm but a quick forearm allows the tag to Miz. Morrison is tossed onto Miz on the floor and it’s back to Sheamus for a double clothesline off the apron. Back in and Lee sends Morrison flying, followed by a hard whip into the corner. That’s enough to break the turnbuckle so we take a break.

We come back with the turnbuckle repairman earning his pair and Lee whipping Miz into the same corner. This one doesn’t work as well so Sheamus knocks Morrison off the apron. That’s enough of a distraction for Miz to get one off his DDT, setting up some left hands. Morrison grabs a chinlock but has to switch to a gator roll to keep Morrison away from Lee.

A big boot rocks Sheamus but he hit the Irish Curse to cut Miz off. Lee comes in to start running people over with the big shoulders before just throwing Morrison at Miz. Morrison’s Flying Chuck is knocked out of the air but Sheamus tags himself back in to hit the Brogue Kick for the pin at 12:54.

Rating: C. This worked out well enough, including a unique enough spot with the rope breaking to send us to a commercial. Lee and Sheamus teaming for a bit before having a hoss fight is fine, as it gives them something to do and they could be a fun team. It’s nice to see Miz and Morrison get beaten up too, with Lee throwing Morrison at Miz being a cool visual.

HHH talks about how Randy Orton insulted Ric Flair and yeah, he’ll fight Orton tonight. He’s here in a business capacity, but he’ll fight because he wants to know if he would have lit the match.

Sheamus vs. Keith Lee

So much for the waiting. They chop it out to start with Lee getting the better of things, only to be sent out to the floor. Lee suplexes him into the timekeeper’s area but Sheamus dives back in at nine. Sheamus sends him shoulder first into the post and starts stomping away on the arm to keep Lee down.

The armbar goes on for a bit but Lee powers his way to freedom. That’s broken up with a kick to the face so Sheamus goes up, only to get caught on top. A superplex is broken up and Sheamus hits a top rope clothesline. Lee pops back up so it’s a jumping knee for two, followed by another armbar. That’s broken up with a powerbomb, followed by the Spirit Bomb to finish Sheamus at 6:53.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. So they’ve had a tag match and then a singles match, which I’m sure will lead to either another tag or singles match between the two of them. I can’t complain all that much here as it’s nice to see Lee win some matches, and Sheamus is good for a fight, but they can’t stretch this out for a few weeks?

We look at the end of last week’s show, with Goldberg challenging Drew McIntyre for the Royal Rumble title match.

We look at….the end of last week’s show, with Drew McIntyre defeating Keith Lee and then Goldberg making the Rumble challenge.

Drew talks about how he was surprised by Goldberg last week. He and his brother were both Goldberg fans growing up but Goldberg messed with his legacy last week. Goldberg put words in his mouth and then said Drew was thinking them. Drew respects the legends and if Goldberg wants to prove something, they’re on for the Royal Rumble. Goldberg is next.

Riddle compares winning the US Title to eating a pizza with a lot of cheese as the Lucha House Party is rather confused. They tell him to watch his back, but he thinks that’s impossible.

Xavier Woods vs. T-Bar

Woods is on his own (saying Kofi Kingston is injured) and T-Bar (with the rest of Retribution) shoves him around to start. A heck of a clothesline gives T-Bar two and we hit the nerve hold. Woods fights up and chops away before avoiding a charge in the corner. There’s an enziguri to rock T-Bar again, followed by a missile dropkick to the floor. Mace offers a distraction so T-Bar can work on Woods’ arm, setting up Feast Your Eyes (now known as Eyes Wide Shut) for the pin at 3:53.

Rating: C-. It’s nice to see T-Bar and Retribution on a bit of a winning streak for a change, though it’s still kind of hard to believe that anything is going to last. The team just feels so worthless anymore and there is a good chance that they are never going to get out of this hole. At least they’re doing something though, and maybe they can do something better in the future.

Orton is ready to channel his hatred into beating HHH.

We look at Orton challenging HHH again.

US Title: Riddle vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending and jumps Riddle before the bell. Riddle confirms he can go so we officially start, despite his mouth being busted open. Lashley drops him ribs first onto the top rope to send things outside but Riddle is right back with a Floating Bro to the floor. Back in and the Final Flash is countered into a spinebuster as Lashley is getting fired up. The Hurt Lock goes on and Riddle taps at 1:59.

Post match Riddle says he wants MVP, who is game for a fight of his own.

Riddle vs. MVP

MVP is in street clothes but is fine enough to hit Ballin for two. Riddle fights back with the forearms in the corner but Lashley comes in with the spear for the DQ at 1:23.

Post match Lashley beats Riddle down again.

We look at Adam Pearce becoming #1 contender to Roman Reigns thanks to Roman Reigns.

AJ Styles talks to Pearce and says if he catches lightning in a bottle, he can face AJ at Wrestlemania and lose the Universal Title. Drew Gulak pops up to ask to be in the Royal Rumble, but Pearce says Drew can’t just put himself in. Gulak: “Why not? AJ did.” AJ asks who Gulak has beaten so Gulak pulls out a flash drive of his victories. Instead Pearce says Gulak is in if he can beat AJ next.

AJ Styles vs. Drew Gulak

Omos is here with Styles. Gulak starts fast with a rollup for two, followed by a tiger driver for the same. Back up and AJ scores with the Pele kick before shoving Gulak over the top to the floor. Omos puts his foot down next to Gulak’s face (giving us a great bugged out eye look, plus a sweet panning up camera shot on Omos) until AJ comes over to throw him back inside. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Gulak at 3:11.

Rating: C-. As usual, Gulak looked fine while he had a chance but it wasn’t that much of a chance. I like Gulak more and more almost every time I see him but I think he has firmly hit his ceiling. The match was slightly more competitive than I was expecting, even if the ending was never in any serious doubt.

Video on Goldberg.

Keith Lee offers HHH his services against Randy Orton but HHH has this. Lee hands him his leather jacket.

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke

Mandy and Dana are both in the Rumble. Dana’s headlock on Shayna doesn’t work so well as Nia tags herself in and runs Dana over. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Dana fights up and brings in Mandy. Shayna is driven into the corner but Nia gets in a cheap shot to cut her off again. The Samoan drop gets two as Dana makes the save so Baszler grabs the Kirifuda Clutch for the tap at 3:20.

Rating: D+. You know, for a show where the roster is so depleted, you might want to have a few more matches go longer than four minutes. Jax and Baszler continue to dominate while we keep waiting on Rose and Brooke to take over. Then again that might not make Jax look like the most dominant woman ever so why would we want to go in that direction?

HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is in street clothes and we have neither a bell nor a referee. They slug it out to start with Orton getting the better of things before heading outside. HHH whips him into the steps and then near the announcers’ table to take over. That means it’s sledgehammer time, but then the lights start going out. HHH pulls back the sledgehammer….which is now on fire. The lights go out and HHH disappears but we’ve got a distorted version of the Firefly Fun House theme. Cue Alexa Bliss in the corner and she throws a huge fireball at Orton’s face. Orton holds his face and screams a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I know it’s a show no one was going to watch with the football game on and they seem to have been wrecked by a mixture of Coronavirus and injuries, but sweet goodness people. Look at what you have available here and tell me how this is the best show you can put on.

There were ten matches on this show (not counting HHH vs. Orton which was a brawl instead of a match) and seven of them didn’t break four minutes. Maybe try a longer match instead of just replaying the same clips over and over for a change? I can expect that out of a budget promotion like MLW but this is supposed to be the top company around. You have enough people available here and yet four people have to wrestle twice? Even with the situation they were in, WWE can do so much more than this and seeing them punt AGAIN made for a very long three hours.

Results

Lacey Evans b. Charlotte – Pin with Ric Flair holding the foot

Jaxson Ryker b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup with tights

Jeff Hardy b. Elias – Swanton Bomb

Sheamus/Keith Lee b. Miz/John Morrison – Brogue Kick to Morrison

Keith Lee b. Sheamus – Spirit Bomb

T-Bar b. Xavier Woods – Eyes Wide Shut

Bobby Lashley b. Riddle – Hurt Lock

Riddle b. MVP via DQ when Bobby Lashley interfered

AJ Styles b. Drew Gulak – Phenomenal Forearm

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler b. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch to Rose




Monday Night Raw – December 28, 2020: Hanging On A Cliff

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 28, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

It’s the last Raw of the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. The big story coming out of last week saw Sheamus attacking Keith Lee, which did not sit well with WWE Champion Drew McIntyre. That would seem to be setting up a title match at the Royal Rumble, but we have over a month to hammer down the details. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Jon Huber.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Drew McIntyre to get things going. McIntyre talks about how this has been a pretty crazy year for him. We hear about what he has done this year and next week is starting with a bang as he is defending the title on Legends Raw. Here’s Sheamus to interrupt and McIntyre doesn’t want to hear the platitudes. They have known each other for fifteen years and next week they are ready to face off for the title, like they have always wanted to. Sheamus says he just has to Brogue Kick Keith Lee tonight so they can start next year the right way.

Cue Lee (McIntyre: “You had to know this was coming.”) to say he didn’t like getting kicked in the head last week. He’ll wait for the bell tonight to extract an apology, but he does say Sheamus might stab Drew in the back. Sheamus says he kicked Lee last week for always running his mouth about how he was going to turn on Drew. The argument makes McIntyre say let’s get a referee down here and do this now. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Lee before the bell and Drew isn’t happy. Of note: McIntyre got in a Luke Harper “yeah yeah yeah” for a rather nice tribute.

Sheamus vs. Keith Lee

The winner gets a shot at Drew McIntyre, on commentary, next week. Lee shoves him down to start but gets hit in the ribs, setting up a quickly broken armbar. Sheamus kicks Lee down again and stands on his face to set up another armbar. Back up and Lee suplexes him to the floor, setting up a posting. Sheamus knees him down on the way back in though and a top rope clothesline puts Lee onto the announcers’ table.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus hitting the ten forearms to the chest. Sheamus goes up top but misses an ax handle, allowing Lee to pounce him down. The spinebuster gives Lee two but the Spirit Bomb is blocked. Instead it’s something like a crossbody for two on Sheamus and a better version connects for the same. Back up and Sheamus manages White Noise but loses a battle of headbutts. The Grizzle Magnum sets up the Spirit Bomb to give Lee the pin and the title shot at 12:54.

Rating: B-. There’s something great about two big guys hitting each other really hard for a little while and that’s what they did here. Lee getting the shot is certainly interesting, even if it seems likely to be a path towards a triple threat at the Royal Rumble (or Sheamus getting a shot of some kind). Either way, nice hoss match here, which is all it needed to be.

Lee goes out to see McIntyre post match and the title is held up.

Miz vs. Gran Metalik

John Morrison and Lince Dorado are at ringside. Miz is rather distraught over losing the briefcase so Metalik grabs some rollups for early near falls. A headscissors sends Miz to the floor and there’s a dropkick to put him down again. Metalik adds a moonsault to the floor but Miz hits a big boot back inside. A second big boot sets up a reverse chinlock and Miz throws in a bunch of trash talk. Back up and Miz misses a shot, allowing Metalik to grab a sunset flip for the upset pin at 3:22.

Rating: C-. Metalik was flying all over the place to start and the upset was a nice touch. What matters most here was going with a bit of a surprise, even if it is more about Miz than Metalik. I’m curious to see where this is going for Miz, but it’s nice to see him getting featured at a more appropriate level. At the same time, I could go for more of the luchadors but that isn’t likely to be the case.

AJ Styles and Omos interrupt Elias’ practice and Jaxson Ryker isn’t happy. AJ says Elias is more like Johnny Trash and a match is set for later.

Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler

Mandy Rose is in Brooke’s corner. Brooke slaps her in the face to start but the cartwheel splash hits knee. Baszler cranks the arm across the apron and slaps on an armbar back inside. The Kirifuda Clutch goes on from the floor with Mandy yelling at Baszler. The arm stomp misses so Brooke takes it back inside for a running flip neckbreaker for two. Brooke has to bail out of something off the top though and it’s a jumping knee into the Kirifuda Clutch for the tap at 3:32.

Rating: D+. Brooke is trying rather hard but there is no reason to believe that she is going to be able to beat someone like Baszler. That makes these matches rather boring to watch as you can only have so much reason to believe that it’s going to work. Brooke has come a long way, but the gap is still far too big for her to cross.

Long video on Randy Orton vs. the Fiend with Alexa Bliss hinting that the Fiend will be back.

Here’s Alexa Bliss with Alexa’s Playground because she too needs another talk show. Bliss talks about how the Fiend is gone but he’ll be back someday. Maybe next week at Legends Raw, because he wants to meet his hero, Hulk Hogan. Fiend has been taking his vitamins and saying his prayers, but Bliss doesn’t want to know what he prays to. After her own “yeah yeah yeah”, Bliss introduces Randy Orton, who doesn’t come out.

Bliss does it again and again there is no Orton. Bliss finds this rude, but we go to the Firefly Fun House, where Orton walks through the door. That’s not cool with Bliss, and Orton makes it worse by kicking Huskus the Pig away. Orton laughs at the idea that the Fiend could come back and throws Mercy the Buzzard out the window, taking out Abigail in the process. Orton ribs Ramblin Rabbit’s head off as Bliss challenges Orton for tonight. Orton thinks this is where Fiend is supposed to return, so he accepts.

We look at Nia Jax attacking Charlotte to put her on the shelf six months ago.

Charlotte is ready for revenge, even against someone like Jax. Asuka comes in to celebrate the new year because Jax isn’t ready for Charlotte.

AJ Styles vs. Elias

Omos and Jaxson Ryker are here too. AJ strikes away to start but gets caught with a backdrop for one. They head outside with Elias sending him arm first into the post as we take a break. Back with Elias hitting a top rope Meteora to set up a chinlock. AJ gets sent outside so Omos offers some intimidation.

They head back inside with AJ hitting the Phenomenal Blitz into the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. Drift Away gives Elias the same but the Pele catches him on top. A quick TKO gives Elias another two but AJ goes to the apron for a forearm. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Elias at 14:02.

Rating: C+. This deserves the same complaint that I have about a good number of AEW matches: it didn’t need to be this long and felt like they were extending it out for the sake of extending it out. Elias looked pretty good here, but it’s kind of hard to believe that AJ is going to need fourteen minutes to beat him. The match was far from bad, but cut something like this down.

We see a clip from Raw Talk with Ricochet talking about how frustrated he is with losing all the time. Something needs to change.

Mustafa Ali says Ricochet needs to change.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ricochet

The rest of Retribution is here too. Ricochet hammers away to start and hits an early powerslam for two. The dropkick gets two but a Retribution distraction lets Ali knock him into the corner. Mace shoves Ricochet off the top for a crash and we take a break. Back with Ali grabbing a chinlock but Ricochet fights up and manages a moonsault into a German suplex to put them both down.

A hard clothesline drops Ali as well and the Kick Back connects, only to have Mace pull Ali out. The rest of Retribution gets on the apron so Ricochet tries a springboard DDT to T-Bar off the apron, which only somewhat connects and nearly kills T-Bar. Ali gets dropkicked into the post and another tornado DDT drops Mace with another scary landing. Back in and Ricochet’s shooting star press hits Ali’s knees, setting up the Koji Clutch to knock Ricochet out at 11:50.

Rating: B-. They had me believing in Ricochet again there near the end and that’s a pretty impressive trick. They’re doing something with Ricochet fighting against the team but I’m not sure where it ends. I can’t imagine Ricochet joining the team, but at least Retribution and Ricochet are FINALLY doing something for a change.

Post match Ali offers Ricochet the chance to join Retribution, earning himself a no and the Recoil.

Nia Jax says she has some goals: beat Charlotte, get the Tag Team Titles back, and (Shayna Baszler: “There’s a #3?”) enter the Royal Rumble to go on to Wrestlemania. Baszler likes the sound of that idea.

We look at Keith Lee becoming #1 contender.

Drew McIntyre says everyone has been waiting for Lee to step up, but he might not like what he finds up there. Lee can beat anyone when he is motivated, except Drew of course. See you next week.

Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Asuka and Shayna Baszler are here too. Nia powers her around to start so Charlotte grabs the arm. That’s broken up with power so Charlotte starts slugging away to knock her outside. Baszler and Asuka come over as Charlotte sends Jax into the post. Back in and the Figure Eight is easily countered with a shove into the corner and we take a break.

We come back with Jax hitting a sitout powerbomb (with the feed going black for a bit, possibly due to Charlotte’s gear having some issues) but Baszler and Asuka get into a brawl. Charlotte avoids the legdrop and tries the Figure Eight but Baszler comes in with the Kirifuda Clutch for the DQ at 10:52.

Rating: C. You can probably pencil in the rematch for the Tag Team Titles for the Rumble, even if it might not be the most thrilling story. Jax just wrestles the same match far too often and it brings down what value she has. Charlotte needs to shake some rust off, but she’s going to be the focal point of the division until Becky gets back at least so she doesn’t have much to worry about.

The Hurt Business chases off another random guy in the back.

Angel Garza has a rose when Charly Caruso comes up for an awkward reunion. Garza won’t say who the rose is for but here are R-Truth and the merry band of numskulls to knock the rose out of his hand. The petals are on the floor so Garza hands it to her anyway, saying it’s the thought that counts. Caruso doesn’t seem impressed.

We look at Big E. winning the Intercontinental Title on Smackdown.

Riddle, Jeff Hardy and New Day try to come up with a four man team name.

Riddle/Jeff Hardy/New Day vs. Hurt Business

During the entrances, Bobby Lashley declares for the Royal Rumble so he can main event THIS YEAR’S Wrestlemania. Cedric Alexander dropkicks Riddle down to start but walks into a gutwrench suplex. Lashley comes in to shoulder Riddle down and it’s off to Shelton to drive him into the corner. Riddle takes Shelton into the corner for a change and the Unicorn Stampede is on, capped off by Hardy’s slingshot dropkick.

Everything breaks down and house is cleaned, with the Hurt Business being knocked outside. Lashley has to be held back and we take a break. Back with Lashley hitting a Downward Spiral for two on Riddle and handing it to Shelton for a half crab. Cedric’s reverse chinlock doesn’t last long as Riddle comes back with a kick to the head. Kofi comes in off the hot tag to clean house, including the Boom Drop to Alexander.

Woods makes a blind tag and Kofi dives onto Shelton. Everything breaks down again with Woods taking out Cedric and MVP at the same time. Jeff dives off the top onto MVP and Woods nails Alexander with the discus lariat (Tom: “A big Harper clothesline!”) and Hardy adds the Swanton. Lashley makes the save and Shelton knees Riddle off the apron. The Twist hits Shelton and Lashley comes back in, only to have Hardy block the spear. That’s fine with Lashley, as it’s the Hurt Lock to finish Hardy at 14:27.

Rating: B-. They were hitting another level with that everything breaks down sequence and it went on for a lot longer than something like that usually does. I’m not sure how much value there is in having Hardy tap out tot he same hold again but they kept Riddle and Lashley looking strong, which is what matters most. The Hurt Business continues to be one of the best things in WWE today and the more I see of them next year the better things will be.

Post match the brawl stays on with Riddle hitting the Final Flash to Lashley so the team can escape.

John Morrison tries to perk Miz up but saying John Cena lost to Kevin Federline doesn’t help. Adam Pearce comes up with the Money in the Bank briefcase…..because he’s here to return it to Miz. It turns out that Miz is right so he’s Mr. Money in the Bank again. Celebrating ensues.

Here is Alexa Bliss so Randy Orton can answer her challenge. Orton asks where Fiend is but Bliss says this is about her. She goes outside to find a present, which contains gasoline. Bliss challenges Orton to do to her what he did to him but Orton doesn’t move. Bliss pours the gasoline on herself and says light the match.

Orton still won’t move so she calls him a little b**** and pours the rest of the gas on herself. Orton: “You think I won’t do it?” He talks about how much he loves to hurt people so if Bliss wants to join the Fiend in h***, he’ll make her join him. There go the lights so Orton lights the match….and that’s it. Dang when is the last time they had an actual cliffhanger???

Overall Rating: B-. This was an up and down show as they didn’t have some of the best efforts on parts of the card. What matters here though is it feels like they are focused on the Royal Rumble and that’s a good thing. WWE does far better when they have something to focus on and you can get a long way based off having people announced for the Rumble. I’m curious to see where some of these stories go though and since there is no football on next week, some people might actually watch the show for a change.

Results

Keith Lee b. Sheamus – Spirit Bomb

Gran Metalik b. Miz – Sunset flip

Shayna Baszler b. Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch

AJ Styles b. Elias – Phenomenal Forearm

Mustafa Ali b. Ricochet – Koji Clutch

Charlotte b. Nia Jax via DQ when Shayna Baszler interfered

Hurt Business b. New Day/Riddle/Jeff Hardy – Hurt Lock to Hardy

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 21, 2020: That’s WWE For You

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 21, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

So we’re coming off Tables, Ladders And Chairs where the Fiend was burned alive to end the show. That’s kind of intense, but it’s cool because he sent out a tweet about twenty minutes later just in case there was any emotional impact built up. Last week’s numbers were an all time disaster and there is a chance we’re in for a shakeup (it’s been long enough since they’ve, ahem, fixed the problems around here) tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Tables, Ladders And Chairs if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Charlotte, now billed as a thirteen time champion because of the Women’s Tag Team Title, to get things going. We look at Charlotte returning last night to help Asuka against Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler, with Charlotte saying that she’s always willing to help a friend when asked. Charlotte introduces Asuka, who comes out to rant in Japanese, before switching to English to say she’s a double champion.

Charlotte brings up the Raw Women’s Title, friend to friend of course, but here are Baszler and Jax to interrupt. Nia says Charlotte took six months to heal up her broken arm but that voice is still just as robotic. Charlotte mocks her for losing last night but Nia says the two of them have a naughty or nice list. They just hand out beatings, like the one they gave to Lana.

Cue Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke, who are scheduled to face Jax and Baszler later tonight. Mandy thinks something looks different about Dana. She can’t figure it out, but she knows Baszler looks like Rudolph with a nose job and Jax is a reindeer without antlers. Then they get it: they aren’t the champions anymore. Charlotte says get a referee out here and the champs will sit around and watch.

There is going to be a Legends Night on January 4, featuring Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Kurt Angle and more. So there’s your effort to make the show better: the exact same people who they always trot out for something like this. Great indeed.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Charlotte and Asuka are on commentary as Baszler takes Rose down to start. Rose tries some grappling of her own and Baszler has not time for any of that, kicking her away without much trouble. A kick to the head gets two on Baszler though and it’s off to Brooke for a double suplex. Jax comes in and gets taken down with a very spinning headscissors. An ax handle to the knee and a knee from Rose put Jax on the floor.

The double dives take out Jax and Baszler but Rose and Brooke stop for a staredown with Charlotte and Asuka. Jax sends Rose into the barricade though and we take a break. Back with Rose slugging away on Jax but getting taken down by Baszler. Jax and Baszler stomp away on the leg but Jax misses the legdrop.

Baszler gets knocked off the apron though, leaving Rose to clothesline Baszler and hammer away in the corner. It’s off to Brooke for the cartwheel splash and a step up enziguri drops Baszler. The Swanton gets two with Jax making the save so Brooke takes Jax down on the floor. Baszler kicks Rose down though and hits a spinning backbreaker on Brooke. The stomp onto the arm misses but Baszler Kirifuda Clutches Brooke for the tap at 12:56.

Rating: C-. Brooke and Rose are there for obvious reasons and while they were trying here, I didn’t buy them as any kind of a threat to the monsters and it would have been fairly ridiculous to have them win. That being said, they do seem to be trying to get better and if they keep improving, good for them and good for us in the future.

Post match Jax gets sent out over the top post match for the big crash.

We look back at the Hurt Business winning the Tag Team Titles last night.

The Hurt Business finds a production worker wearing a New Day shirt, which they rip off and replace with a Hurt Business shirt. Dude got a new shirt so I don’t see this as a huge problem.

Here’s the Hurt Business for the VIP Lounge. MVP brags about their success and says the VIP Lounge is for people better than you. Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander brag about their win last night and Bobby Lashley says no one can beat him for the US Title. MVP thinks it’s a special occasion so he has a professional photographer for a photo. R-Truth photo bombs them though and the merry band of idiots chases him off.

Cue Riddle and Jeff Hardy to interrupt, with Riddle saying the Hurt Business should be chilling instead of being worried. Maybe listen to the Joe Rogan podcast or watch a Dave Chapelle special and escape the existential nature of life. After all, we’re all carbon based lifeforms living on a rock hurdling into space. MVP: “Nobody knows what you’re talking about. Nobody cares about your hair brained concepts. Why are you here?” Hardy says there is more to life than status and they would rather die with pride than live a life of greed. Ok then.

Angel Garza vs. Drew Gulak

Before the match, Garza gives the backstage interviewer a rose and offers her a post match interview under the mistletoe. She seems…..intrigued? Unsure? Thinking she forgot to pick up bread this week? Garza TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and throws them at Gulak to start, meaning it’s time to hammer away early on. A backbreaker gets Gulak out of trouble but Garza chops him in the corner. Garza hits a running knee to the ribs for one but the Wing Clipper finishes Gulak at 2:13.

We look at Drew McIntyre successfully defending the WWE Title last night against AJ Styles and Miz, who cashed in Money in the Bank.

AJ Styles blames Miz for costing him the title. Now he’s going to be on MizTV to hear an explanation and it better be good.

It’s time for MizTV, because on a show where we have so many people sitting on the sidelines, we can have two talk shows in the first hour with wrestlers in action later tonight. Miz apologizes for losing last night and brings out AJ for another apology. AJ yells at Miz for costing him the title by failing at a cash in but Miz snaps, saying he successfully cashed in ten years ago. Now he can’t do it again, because he has been here for fifteen years and no one respects him. Maybe becoming champion again would make people respect him but now he won’t have the chance.

Miz apologizes to AJ because they were both robbed last night. He even has a peace offering: AJ Styles can co-star in the next Marine film! We see a poster, which features Miz and Omos front and center, with a tony AJ on the head. Omos grabs the mic and says Miz screwed up last night but Morrison defends him. AJ talks about how Omos was about to have a peanut butter and Morrison sandwich last night but AJ called him off. Hang on though as Miz thinks that because Morrison technically cashed in the briefcase, he should get the contract back.

Miz demands it back RIGHT NOW but here’s Drew McIntyre to say he had a little celebration after he won the match last night. There was a little celebration and he, Keith Lee and Sheamus had an idea for a sequel to last week’s Night Before TLC. Sheamus and Lee pop up to read their part of the poem, which is all about tonight’s six man street fight. Drew thinks we should just do it now, but AJ dropkicks Lee into Sheamus, meaning Drew has to separate them.

We recap Retribution trying to recruit Ricochet over the last few weeks.

Drew has to keep Sheamus and Lee apart in the back. Sheamus leaves and Drew tells Lee that the three of them can do some damage together. Lee eventually agrees.

T-Bar vs. Ricochet

Retribution is at ringside as Ricochet kicks away at T-Bar to start. The springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air though and the standing backbreakers let T-Bar toss him around. T-Bar blasts him with a clothesline for two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Ricochet low bridges him to the floor but has to deal with Shatter and Mace. That’s enough for T-Bar to get in a boot from behind, but Mustafa Ali stops T-Bar to yell at Ricochet. T-Bar saves Ali from Ricochet and Feast Your Eyes gives T-Bar the pin at 2:43.

Post match T-Bar tells Ricochet to join Retribution or be ended.

New Day says they’ll be back after last night’s loss.

Hurt Business vs. Riddle/Jeff Hardy

Bobby Lashley/MVP for the Hurt Business here with the rest of the team at ringside. Hardy jumps the Business to start and hands it off to Riddle in a hurry. Riddle doesn’t do so well as Lashley takes him into the corner, meaning MVP can come in for the choking. A neckbreaker gets two on Riddle but he gets in a shot of his own, allowing the tag off to Hardy.

The legdrop between the legs into a basement dropkick gets two on Lashley, who powers out on the kickout. Broetry in Motion hits Lashley and the assisted Floating Bro keeps MVP in trouble. We take a break and come back with Hardy being knocked off the top and onto the steps on the way to the floor. Lashley starts going after the arm and MVP adds an armbar with an elbow into the shoulder.

The Ballin Elbow gets two but MVP misses a charge in the corner, allowing Hardy to hit the Whisper in the Wind. The hot tag brings in Riddle to clean house, with Alexander’s distraction not slowing him down in the slightest. A fisherman’s suplex connects but Lashley makes a very fast save. Riddle takes out Alexander and Benjamin but Lashley avoids the Swanton. The Twist of Fate is countered into the Hurt Lock and the tap at 11:50.

Rating: C+. This was pretty straight formula stuff and it’s a good thing to see Lashley getting another win. I’m really wanting to see Riddle vs. Lashley for the US Title, likely at the Rumble at this point, but I’m not sure where that leaves Hardy and the rest of the team for now. The Hardy Bros isn’t exactly a brilliant idea, but for a short form team, it should work out well enough.

Here’s Elias for a song. He talks about how rough of a year it has been but he has discovered someone who understands the Universal Truth in Jaxson Ryker. Now get his opponent out here.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Gran Metalik

Ryker throws him around to start as Elias sits on the turnbuckle for a song. Metalik avoids a charge into the post and hurricanranas Elias, but Ryker runs him over. The sitout chokebomb finishes Metalik at 57 seconds.

We recap last night’s main event, including the post match burning of the Fiend.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. He has been called sick, twisted, deranged and demented and last night, he showed he was all of those things when he burned the Fiend alive. Orton is not a normal man and he enjoyed every single second of what he did. He kneels down to look at the exact spot where it happened and says he can smell it if he closes his eyes. Orton: “Burning flesh has a tendency to linger.” Last night he couldn’t sleep because the voices in his head were gone.

All that he could hear instead was the Fiend gasping for breath and the flames got hotter. Orton says the Fiend is no more and he is the evil son of a b**** who took him out. Speaking of out, the lights go out and Alexa Bliss, on a swing set is in the ring. Bliss says he built this for her and now it’s Alexa’s Playground. Orton is probably wondering where He is. Maybe He is at a tanning salon or at the beach or maybe he’s at his favorite restaurant, eating his favorite food (Bliss: “Barbecue!”).

But Orton is right: it was right here where you can still see and smell what happened to the Fiend. It’s almost like Fiend was absorbed into the mat and now he’s home in the earth. But if he ever leaves home, he’ll come back to Alexa’s Playground and it’ll be like nothing Orton has ever seen. The lights go out again and…..we look at commentary. As usual, WWE is horrible at building up tension as this could have taken six weeks but instead it took one day. Just let us believe that Fiend could be gone instead of all but saying “yeah he’ll be back” the next night.

We look back at Charlotte returning to win the Tag Team Titles last night.

Lacey Evans and Peyton Royce are ready to take care of Charlotte and Asuka tonight.

Lacey Evans/Peyton Royce vs. Asuka/Charlotte

Non-title. Royce is caught in the Asuka Lock fifteen seconds in with Evans having to make a save. Asuka kicks Lacey in the ribs as we see Baszler and Jax watching from the back. Royce gets in a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Asuka in trouble but Lacey and Peyton get in an argument, allowing Asuka to suplex her way over for the tag to Charlotte. Chops abound and a big boot drops Royce. Charlotte gets pulled into a half crab though and Evans tries to play defense, only to have Asuka slip in for the save. Asuka kicks Lacey down and the Figure Eight finishes Royce at 8:03.

Rating: C. Just a quick win to keep Asuka and Charlotte hot after their title win last night. The team should be fine as a dream team for a little while, but I’m not sure who is supposed to take the titles other than Baszler and Jax. That can work for the time being though, as it’s not like the titles are regularly defended in the first place. On the other side, it’s nice to see that we are getting closer to the Iiconics reunion every single week.

We look at Titus O’Neil giving a long time Tampa worker a car after 27 years on the job. It was one of five cars that O’Neil and his foundation gave away.

We look back at Drew McIntyre having to break up the fight between Sheamus and Keith Lee.

Miz is on the phone trying to get his contract back but AJ walks up to hang up the phone. Miz isn’t happy.

Drew McIntyre/Sheamus/Keith Lee vs. Miz/John Morrison/AJ Styles

Holiday street fight, so Morrison and Sheamus start things off. Morrison elbows Sheamus in the head and takes him down by the leg in a bit of a surprise. Sheamus is taken into the corner for some triple teaming but Sheamus powers his way out without much trouble. It’s off to McIntyre, with Morrison taking him down by the leg. The Glasgow Kiss rocks Morrison though and Lee comes in for a double toss suplex to send Morrison flying.

A double shoulder drops Morrison as well and there’s a double hiptoss to AJ from Sheamus and Lee. Sheamus glares at Lee, who slaps him in the chest, causing Drew to have to separate them again and we take a break. Back with Miz and Morrison being shoved off the apron as things have calmed down a bit. Sheamus puts AJ in a chinlock but Styles gets up for the tag off to Morrison.

That’s fine with Sheamus, who knocks him down and goes up top, only to be shoved down through one of the tables at ringside. Back in and Miz takes over on Sheamus, even ripping at his face to make it worse. AJ comes in and cuts Sheamus off, only to get caught with White Noise. The hot tag brings in McIntyre to clean house with a bunch of suplexes. McIntyre nips up but tweaks his leg (which Morrison worked on earlier and AJ damaged last night) in the process.

It’s fine enough to hit a spinebuster for two as everything breaks down. Lee runs over Styles and Morrison takes the Irish Curse. AJ comes in with some candy cane kendo stick shots to McIntyre’s knee to take things outside. McIntyre throws him into a Christmas tree and then hits a powerbomb through a table of egg nog and cookies.

The Claymore is broken up but Sheamus tags himself in to load up the Brogue Kick. Lee tags himself in as well and shoves Morrison into Omos’ arms, allowing Omos to drop Morrison through a table (with the camera cutting to the ring and then back to the powerbomb). The Spirit Bomb finishes Miz at 18:25.

Rating: D+. What kind of a street fight was that? This was a regular six man (with tags) for fifteen minutes with a weapons shot and some tables being broken in the last three, making me wonder why they bothered with the theme at all here. It didn’t help that they’re redoing the arguing teams from the Survivor Series deal (with two of the same people) a month later, but you can’t expect WWE to be that creative. At least Sheamus vs. McIntyre should be fine for a Rumble title match.

Post match Sheamus hits Lee with the Brogue Kick, causing McIntyre to yell WHY to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This definitely wasn’t the reset show and really, it’s not the worst thing to do. The numbers aren’t going to be great in the first place, but it’s also four days until Christmas and they have over a month before the Royal Rumble. Why bother trying to do something big here when they aren’t going to have an audience in the first place? Granted it probably isn’t a good idea to take a week off after last week’s terrible number, but that’s WWE for you.

Results

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax b. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch to Brooke

Angel Garza b. Drew Gulak – Wing Clipper

T-Bar b. Ricochet – Feast Your Eyes

Hurt Business b. Jeff Hardy/Riddle – Hurt Lock to Hardy

Jaxson Ryker b. Gran Metalik – Sitout chokebomb

Charlotte/Asuka b. Peyton Royce/Lacey Evans – Figure Eight to Royce

Keith Lee/Sheamus/Drew McIntyre b. John Morrison/The Miz/AJ Styles – Spirit Bomb to Miz

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Tables Ladders And Chairs 2020: ….Oh My….

Tables Ladders And Chairs 2020
Date: December 20, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

It’s time to wrap up the year and I’m not sure what that is going to mean. For the first time in a good many years, we don’t have matches based on all three of the letters in the show’s name, but rather two based on all three of them combined. That could be a good way to go and hopefully that is the case here. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Daniel Bryan/Chad Gable/Otis/Big E. vs. Sami Zayn/Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro/King Corbin

Well that’s kind of a huge for a tossed together match. Big E. plays an air version of Nakamura’s violin and Sami, with the two Sami Awards, has a shirt saying I’m The Intercontinental Champion. We also get some audio from Kayla Braxton’s Instagram of Sami giving quite the rant about wanting to fire people who caused it. Sami and Gable start so it’s off to Big E. in two seconds.

Corbin comes in as well and gets powered back into the corner. There’s the belly to belly and it’s off to Cesaro vs. Gable for a change. Gable starts taking him down without much effort and goes after the arm. Bryan comes in to keep the cranking going but gets driven up against the ropes. Nakamura adds a kick from the apron and comes in to work on the cravate. It’s back to Sami as Cole explains the joke about Sami’s backstage rant. Bryan fights up against Corbin as Big E. chases Sami around ringside.

The hot tag brings in Otis, who knocks Nakamura down to set up the Caterpillar. With Nakamura crushed, Gable comes in and gets kicked in the face. Nakamura hits a middle rope knee to the head, setting up a gutwrench jackknife from Cesaro. We hit the parade of secondary finishes, including a running knee from Bryan and Rolling Chaos Theory from Gable to Cesaro. Sami comes in but Gable rolls over to Big E., who counters the Helluva Kick into the Rock Bottom out of the corner. The Big Ending finishes Sami at 8:47.

Rating: C+. If nothing else, it was weird to see this kind of star power in a random match on the Kickoff Show. The ending was all that mattered, but it does kind of leave you wondering how this many people, many of whom are featured on Smackdown most weeks, are only being thrown onto this show with a few hours’ notice. What we got worked well though, as most of the people involved know how to put together a perfectly entertaining match.

The opening video looks at how this is the end of the year and could be the end of the people involved. The two main events get the big feature, probably because they’re named after the show, though the other matches get some focus of their own.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Drew McIntyre for the Raw World Title. There isn’t much of a story here, as Drew is champion and AJ won a mini tournament to get the shot. They have used the various weapons on each other and now it’s time to have the big weapons match.

Raw World Title: AJ Styles vs. Drew McIntyre

AJ, with Omos, is challenging in a TLC match. Styles goes for the knee at the bell but has to settle for chopping McIntyre in the corner instead. That earns AJ a toss out of the corner and Drew is looking especially fired up here. We get a little miscommunication as AJ is whipped into the corner and falls down, even as McIntyre follows for a running clothesline. Instead it’s kind of a running right hand, followed by a backdrop to put AJ down again.

AJ gets a boot up in the corner but Drew hits a loud chop to take him off the top and out to the floor again. Drew sends him into the barricade a few times and loads up the first ladder. That means it’s time for a chair with AJ cracking him over the back and wedging the chair in the corner. McIntyre sends him head first into said chair though and it’s time to climb. AJ is back up to pelt the chair at Drew though and they’re both down again. The Styles Clash onto the ladder is broken up though and it’s the Future Shock to plant AJ instead.

Drew tosses the ladder at AJ but only grazes him a bit, allowing AJ to take out the leg. The Calf Crusher, in the ladder, goes on to make McIntyre scream. With that broken up, AJ unloads on the knee with the chair. The Calf Crusher goes on again with the chair around McIntyre’s knee but he counters by sending him into the ladder for a double knockdown. It’s AJ up first to wrap the leg around the post. A table is cleared at ringside but Drew is up first to throw a chair at AJ for a breather.

The ladder is set up in the corner and a table is set up across from it, with AJ managing a drop toehold into said ladder. AJ kicks at the knee again but dives into a suplex into the ladder to put him in trouble again. Styles is fine enough to hit a Phenomenal Forearm but can’t follow up. It’s Styles up first to climb the ladder but McIntyre slams him off the ladder and through a ringside table.

McIntyre goes up….and here’s Miz to powerbomb McIntyre through the table. The briefcase is OFFICIALLY cashed in and we now have a triple threat. Miz goes up but Omos pulls him down and drops him through a table at ringside. John Morrison chairs Omos across the back, shattering the (metal) chair, which only annoys the giant. Omos slowly stalks him to the back and we’re down to the actual three involved.

McIntyre goes up but AJ is right there to catch him. Miz brings in his own ladder though and goes up as well. The Glasgow Kiss drops AJ and McIntyre shoves Miz down but AJ is back up with a springboard to the ladder. McIntyre gets knocked down so Miz takes his place, only to have McIntyre shove them both down. There’s the Claymore to Miz and McIntyre retains at 26:58.

Rating: B. This went as expected until the Miz cash-in, as they just had two big stars beating the fire out of each other. The problem is that’s the kind of match that we have seen time after time in TLC, so it hit a pretty firm ceiling. The good thing is that ceiling is pretty high up there and they had a hard hitting match. Not a memorable one or anything, but it worked well. Above all else though, Miz and John Morrison aren’t going to be running around with the briefcase so that annoyance is out of the way.

Paul Heyman is asked about Kevin Owens saying he will win the Universal Title or die trying. After mocking Kayla Braxton for going for aesthetics over competency, Heyman talks about how favorite non-WWE sport is actually NASCAR. Not that he cares about who wins of course, but he likes the car crashes. Tonight it is going to be a huge car crash, and Roman Reigns is retaining because that is a spoiler.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Carmella for Banks’ Smackdown Women’s Title. Banks won the title from Bayley to end her year plus reign but was then attacked by Carmella. They already had their first match, with Carmella winning via DQ. Since then, Carmella has hit her with a pair of champagne bottles to the back, meaning Banks is coming in a bit weakened.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Sasha Banks

Banks is defending and Carmella drops straight to the floor to start. That’s not going to work for Banks who chases her back inside for an armdrag. This time around Banks sends her off the apron and into the arms of the sommellier, Reginald. Carmella uses the distraction to drive Banks into the steps for two and we settle down a bit. They head out to the apron where the Bank Statement is broken up, allowing Carmella to send her face first onto said apron.

Back in and Banks kicks away a bit, setting up Three Amigos to put Carmella down for a change. The frog splash connects for two on Carmella but Banks spins around into an X Factor (with a hard landing). That gives Carmella some near falls of her own and it’s time to slap it out with some vinegar. Banks goes up top and gets caught in a superplex attempt, only to reverses into a super sunset flip for two. A backslide gives Banks two more but Carmella slaps on the Code of Silence.

That’s reversed into a rollup for two and Banks flips her into the Bank Statement. Reginald pulls Carmella out though and carries her away, only to get caught with a Meteora off the apron. Carmella nails a superkick for two back inside so she shouts her name a lot. That’s too much for Banks, who pulls her into the Bank Statement for the tap at 12:44.

Rating: C. They were trying here but there are only so many ways that you can get around the idea of Carmella being a serious threat to Banks. Carmella isn’t the joke that she used to be but the champagne deal wasn’t exactly a strong upgrade and Banks shouldn’t be losing anytime soon. And what about Banks’ back being hurt by the champagne bottles?

Billie Kay tries to talk Asuka into being her partner, complete with offering her resume. She points out that she speaks Japanese, which has Asuka rather pleased. Kay doesn’t quite get what Asuka says, but she has even made her own mask. Granted it looks like a paper plate on a popsicle stick, so Asuka is disturbed. It doesn’t matter though, as Asuka already has a partner and Kay ISN’T READY FOR ASUKA.

New Day says they’ve beaten the Hurt Business but this is BIG TIME New Day, so…..dang it they’re still not used to not having Big E. to do the entrance.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Hurt Business

Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander are challenging for the Hurt Business with MVP in their corner. Kofi kicks Alexander down for two at the bell and Woods comes in for the same off a legdrop. A crossbody gives Kofi two more and it’s time for the legdrop into a sliding clothesline into a springboard splash for two more on Alexander. Shelton comes in and gets forearmed by Woods as Kofi fights Alexander on the floor.

A tornado DDT gives Woods two on Shelton, who sends Woods hard into the bottom turnbuckle. That gives Alexander two and MVP is rather pleased about the chinlock with a knee in Woods’ back. The armbar doesn’t last long on Woods as he fights up and brings in Kofi off the hot tag.

As Tom brings up Shelton vs. Kofi on ECW of all things, Kofi hits the Boom Drop into the SOS for two on Alexander. Trouble in Paradise misses though and Alexander hits a running knee into a brainbuster. The Neuralizer into Paydirt puts Woods on the floor and Shelton runs the corner to superplex Kofi. Alexander tags himself in (much to Shelton’s annoyance) and the Lumbar Check finishes Kofi for pin and the titles at 9:43.

Rating: C-. Kind of a disappointing match but the absolutely right ending. The Hurt Business is becoming one of the best factions in a long time now and I could go with them being at a higher level on the roster. New Day has held the titles ten times now so losing them again isn’t going to mean a thing. Not a bad match, but they got the result right and that’s what matters.

Bobby Lashley comes out to celebrate and the Hurt Business holds up their titles.

The Royal Rumble is coming on January 31.

We recap the Sami Awards with Big E. interfering, plus the leaked audio.

Sami Zayn rants to Kayla Braxton about the leaked audio, but she won’t say who gave it to her.

We recap the Women’s Tag Team Titles. Nia Jax beat up Lana for months, then Lana got Asuka to give her some pep talks, then Lana pinned Jax, then Lana was taken out and now it’s Asuka and a mystery partner getting a title shot against Jax and Shayna Baszler.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Asuka/??? vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Jax and Baszler are defending against Asuka and…..Charlotte, who seems to have lost something during her time away (it’s in the upper region). It’s Asuka starting with Baszler, who can’t take out Asuka’s arm early on. Charlotte comes in to face Jax, who takes her into the corner early on. You don’t do that to Charlotte, who fights out and brings Asuka back in. Baszler goes after Asuka’s arm again, including sending it into the post.

Back in and the standing armbar goes on but Asuka fights her off, allowing the hot tag off to Charlotte. Chopping abounds and the big boot drops Jax to the floor. Charlotte mostly hits the moonsault to take her down again and it’s the missile dropkick from Asuka back inside. Baszler comes in for the Kirifuda Clutch but it’s broken up in a hurry. Instead a small package gets two on Baszler, followed by Jax having to break up the Figure Eight. With Jax being dispatched again, it’s the Natural Selection to finish Baszler for the pin and the titles at 9:14.

Rating: C. How in the world did we start with Lana being sent through tables over and over and wind up with Charlotte getting another title reign? It was nice to have Charlotte gone for a good while like this though as I think we needed a breather from her after all the title matches. I doubt they hold the titles for a long time, but you know Charlotte is coming for Asuka sooner or later.

Sami Zayn finds Big E. and R-Truth laughing at the leaked audio, meaning it’s time to claim a conspiracy. Truth knows a conspiracy: your lips don’t touch when you say separate. Sami calls Big E. a loser since he went solo, and that’s enough to bring out serious Big E. This isn’t going to end well for Sami is it?

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens in a TLC match because TLC is being headlined by a match involving fire. Reigns told Jey Uso to get respect from the losing team at Survivor Series, including beating Owens down. Owens didn’t like the fact that Reigns had Jey do all of this and wanted the title match as a result. Reigns has since destroyed Owens over and over but Owens refuses to stay down.

Smackdown World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman, is defending in a TLC match. Owens comes in through the crowd and jumps Reigns to start as the beating is on in a hurry. The Cannonball connects and Reigns is sent outside for the frog splash off the apron. Cue Jey Uso to try and help Reigns but Owens chairs him down and Pillmanizes his ankle. Reigns uses the distraction to kick Owens in the face and then drops the top of the announcers’ table onto Owens’ back.

The steps go off of Owens’ head a few times as Heyman is starting to understand that this is getting serious. Owens is thrown back inside for a chair to the back but he picks up his own, only to have Reigns drive his own chair into Owens’ to put him down again. The chairs are set up and, after blocking a powerbomb attempt, Reigns backdrops him through the open chairs for a huge crash. Somehow Owens manages to fight his way up and chairs Reigns off the ladder.

A suplex through a chair keeps Reigns in trouble and Owens goes up until a limping Jey makes the save. The distraction lets Reigns get in a Superman Punch and Owens is down again. Reigns sets up a table in the corner and looks like he knows what he has to do. Owens kicks Jey down though and hits a Stunner on Reigns. The ladder is set up but Owens goes outside to powerbomb Jey through the announcers’ table.

Now it’s time to climb but Reigns makes another save. A spinebuster puts Owens through a table and Reigns chokeslams him through another at ringside for a bonus. Reigns isn’t done yet as it’s a Samoan drop through a third table. That’s enough for the slow climb but Owens grabs his foot, much to Reigns’ annoyance. Reigns looks down and laughs at him, even saying that Owens is embarrassing his family.

A slap to Reigns’ face earns Owens a spear through the table in the corner but Reigns can’t follow up for some reason. Owens is already pulling himself up with a ladder on the floor and Reigns can’t believe it. He tells Reigns he’ll have to kill him but another spear only hits the barricade. Reigns makes the save and sends Owens into the ladder, only to take two superkicks.

The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Superman Punch but Owens hits the Pop Up Powerbomb through the table. Owens goes up again but has to deal with Jey, who is taken down by headbutts and a Stunner. Reigns catches Owens with a low blow on the ladder though and now it’s the guillotine on top. That’s it for Owens as he crashes down, allowing Reigns to retain at 24:43.

Rating: B+. If they don’t do a Last Man Standing match at the Rumble, they’re goofier than I thought. This was one of the better performances I’ve seen in a good while from WWE as I bought into the idea of Owens overcoming the odds, even though there was no reason to believe he could pull it off.

They made this work very well though as Owens just kept coming until the numbers games, and Reigns himself, became too much to overcome. There is a rematch to be had here though and just like Jey, they turned what should have been a completely obvious ending into some great drama. Reigns is on another level right now and that was on full display again here. Owens did his part too though, turning this into a heck of a match.

Big E. is challenging Sami Zayn for the Intercontinental Title on Smackdown.

We recap Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton, which goes back to their time together in the Wyatt Family. Orton outsmarted Bray, to the point where he burned down the Wyatt Compound and destroyed the remains of Sister Abigail. Now Bray is in a better place with the Firefly Fun House and the Fiend wants revenge on Orton for his recent and past sins. Orton is being outsmarted but may have found Bray’s weak spot with Alexa Bliss. That being said, setting Bray on fire didn’t work, as the Fiend popped up and took Orton out. Tonight it’s a Firefly Inferno match, which needs a bit of an explanation.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Orton, in sweatpants and a hoodie, has to fire himself up on the way to the ring. After some rather long entrances, the bell rings, even though we have no explanation of how you win the match yet. There is no fire to speak of to start and Orton’s right hand just makes Fiend laugh. A kick to the ribs gets the same result and the threat of the RKO is shrugged away. Fiend knocks him down in the corner but Sister Abigail is blocked. Orton hits a dropkick but Fiend is back with the running crossbody.

Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker, only to have Wyatt score with Sister Abigail. Fiend throws his arms up to start up some fire behind the barricade. Commentary says we know you have to set your opponent on fire to win (first mention of the way to win and the match started four minutes ago) as they fight outside with Orton being knocked around ringside. Orton gets whipped with a strap….which Fiend then lights on fire.

The big swing misses so Fiend whips out a pick ax. That only hits barricade, as commentary can’t believe Fiend would go that far. So do they just think the LIGHT YOUR OPPONENT ON FIRE rules are here because they were pulled out of a hat? With Orton down, Fiend whips out a rocking chair and some gasoline, which he pours over the chair and then in a path towards it. Orton is sent hard into the steps and then gets set in the chair, so Fiend can pull out a lighter.

The trail is lit up and Orton dives out of the chair just in time (or just before the camera cuts can keep you from seeing everything in one shot). Orton finds an ax handle to knock the steps out of Fiend’s hands and then hits him in the face with them. A chain around the face isn’t enough to drag Fiend into the fire so they head back inside. Fiend plants him with a release Rock Bottom and it’s time to go outside, with Fiend lighting the ax handle on fire. Orton breaks that up as well but the RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw. They fight near the fire with Orton reversing him into the flames for the win at 12:05.

Rating: D+. The fire stuff was forced in the first place and then they didn’t even have fire (or established rules) when the match started. These things are always going to be a stretch of logic at best and that was the case here, as it turns into a horror movie instead of a match most of the time. Orton didn’t need to win but you know this is going on to the Rumble at least. Just stop doing these Inferno matches already though, because they tend to be horrible as soon as you actually try one.

Post match Fiend is still on fire as he charges….right into the RKO. Orton isn’t sure what to think of this as he kicks Fiend over, so he grabs the gas can and covers Fiend. Now it’s time for a match, which Orton throws on Fiend to burn him alive (and send the cameras into complete insanity). Orton poses and we go off the air. I really hope this isn’t the more serious path they’re taking for USA, because they might be in more trouble than I thought.

I know the idea is to have Fiend come back for a big fight at the Rumble, but do I have any reason to believe that this is going to be some big serious moment? Last week’s show featured Orton trying to burn Wyatt and seven minutes later, Riddle was having a doughnut. Maybe they go somewhere smart with it, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up.

Overall Rating: B-. The two TLC matches are enough to carry things, but this was rather typical of a big WWE show: when they let the people do their thing and tell a story, it works. When they try to get too smart, everything collapses under its own weight, which is what happened at the end. The rest of the show was good to very good, with the TLC matches both delivering and some of the other stuff hitting as well. Just cut it off after Reigns wins and you’re in for a much better night, as the big angle at the end was getting into “you might as well hold up the IT’S FAKE” sign.

Results

Drew McIntyre b. AJ Styles and The Miz – McIntyre pulled down the title

Sasha Banks b. Carmella – Bank Statement

Hurt Business b. New Day – Lumbar Check to Kingston

Charlotte/Asuka b. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax – Natural Selection to Baszler

Roman Reigns b. Kevin Owens – Reigns pulled down the title

Randy Orton b. The Fiend – Orton lit the Fiend on fire

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Tables Ladders And Chairs 2020 Preview

It’s time to wrap things up and that means we have one show left before the Road To WrestleMania can begin. As usual that means Tables, Ladders And Chairs but this time around they are going in a different direction. Instead of a tables match, ladder match and chairs match, we’re getting tables, ladders and chairs matches. Ok so it isn’t the biggest difference on paper, but at least they’re trying something. Let’s get to it.

SmackDown Women’s Title: Sasha Banks(c) vs. Carmella

We’ll get one of the weaker matches out of the way early on. Banks has only had the title for a few months now and already has the stigma of not being able to hold onto the thing all that long. It makes sense to let her have a pretty easy feud to start off her reign, but Carmella is not exactly the most thrilling challenger in the world. She’ll do fine here, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up.

Banks retains here, and there really shouldn’t be that much doubt. Carmella has come a long way since her debut, but she is firmly in the second tier (at best) in every era of the women’s division. She is still a former champion though and Banks beating her will mean a little something, though I can’t imagine this being more than a one off shot. MAYBE they have a third match at the Royal Rumble, but Banks isn’t dropping the title to her.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day(c) vs. Hurt Business

I feel like I’m in some kind of time loop with New Day, as they seem like they have been the stay the course choice for the Tag Team Titles for literally years now, always waiting to drop the belts to the next team. That doesn’t exactly make for a thrilling story, and given how many times we’ve seen these four fight in one combination or another, the limited interest has already been taken away.

I’m going to go with new champions here, in the hopes that the Hurt Business gets an even bigger push. The whole group is one of the best around today and I could go for them having even more gold. I know I’ve said this time and time again, but New Day doesn’t need the titles and they could be good for Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander, as both could use the boost. New champions here, even though I don’t quite believe it’s happening.

The Fiend vs. Randy Orton

This is now a Firefly Inferno match, because I guess WWE thinks that fireflies have actual fire or something. It sounds like an Inferno match, which feels really, really tacked on after Orton’s ATTEMPTED MURDER earlier this week. The story has been set up, but I’m still not sure why I should want to see these two fight. That being said, it’s not like the Fiend makes the most sense in the first place and having him outsmart the master strategist is intriguing

I’ll go with Orton to win here though, mainly because his basic boots and trunks don’t leave much to be set on fire (assuming that’s how you win of course). The Fiend winning makes more sense, but I can live with Orton if he doesn’t use Alexa Bliss to upset Fiend. It’s an interesting enough match, but I could go without the fire. Just do what makes sense instead of tacking something on at the last second and (pun intended), leaping straight into the fire.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler(c) vs. Asuka/???

So after about three months of Jax tormenting Lana and setting up the revenge at this show, Lana isn’t even on the card. Instead Asuka is getting the shot with a mystery partner, meaning the whole thing is going to come down to who she has. I’m not entirely convinced it won’t wind up being Dana Brooke and Mandy Rose getting the shot, which would at least make some more sense than whatever they’re doing here.

No matter who it is, I’ll take the champs to retain here as there is zero reason to have Asuka holding two titles again. It would be nice to not have something insane here and hopefully they don’t go too far. Just pick someone who makes sense (Brooke or Rose would make sense on their own) and have the champs beat them up after a bit of a sweat. Don’t go wacky here, because that’s the last thing this story needs.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre(c) vs. AJ Styles

This is the first of the two namesake matches and probably the easier one to guess. The idea here is mainly built around Omos and possibly Sheamus getting involved, but I’m not sure how much that is going to change anything about where it goes. Styles might not be the big monster they were hoping for in Braun Strowman, but he’s as good of a replacement as you are going to get.

Of course McIntyre retains here, as they aren’t going to put the title on McIntyre back in October and then take it off of him in December. There is no reason to think Styles will win here, though that’s not the worst idea in the world. Sometimes it’s ok to have the champ face off with a tough challenge and then win anyway, which is what seems to be the case here. The match should be fun, and Sheamus can challenge McIntyre next month just fine.

SmackDown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Kevin Owens

Oh man I want to see how this could go with a several months long story where Owens might have an actual chance to win the title. Owens has been doing some great stuff as the challenger who will not die no matter what, even if he is up against the monster of monsters in Reigns. The match isn’t exactly full of drama, but I want to see Owens get the title, which is the right feeling.

But yeah, Reigns isn’t losing here and he probably isn’t losing for a very long time. At the end of the day, Reigns is a total star and should not be in any serious danger. Owens is someone who could be a major threat to the title, but it’s not happening here and I don’t think there is any real drama. The story has been quite good though and I want to see Owens give it his all and fail. Owens has done very well in this story and hopefully that goes somewhere in the future, but Reigns is leaving with the title here.

Overall Thoughts

Even with only six matches announced so far, the more I think about this show, the more I like the different format. I know it’s a good bit different than usual, but I really don’t need to have five or six gimmick matches on a single card. You have the big gimmick match in the title so go with what should work well. It’s not like there are many matches on the show that need the gimmicks to help them (though there are a few, including the one that we’re not even getting), so let the big ones get the focus and go from there.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 14, 2020: At Least That Was Good

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 14, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe

It’s the go home show for TLC and that means it is time to really hammer things home for Sunday. In other words, there is a good chance that this show is not going to be all that great or eventful, but commentary will tell us how important Sunday is going to be. Granted it won’t be, but that’s traditional for the December show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Sheamus accidentally Brogue Kicking Drew McIntyre in the face. Everything wound up being fine though, as it tends to be when someone kicks someone else in the face.

Opening sequence.

We open with the Dirt Sheet, featuring a Christmas theme and Miz reading The Nightmare Before TLC. The story involves AJ Styles (here), Omos (introduced by AJ but Miz says he isn’t that important and turns the lights out on him) and Drew McIntyre (as played by John Morrison ala Braveheart). They act out Sunday’s match, starting with a chair shot (Morrison: “OW ME BACK!”) and then stabbing Drew with the sword.

Then Miz will cash in the briefcase, which doesn’t sit well with AJ. Styles: “That is not in the book that I gave you!”. The argument is on until Sheamus, who faces AJ tonight, comes out to interrupt. AJ tries to back up and throws a Christmas tree at him. Sheamus sends him outside and we’re ready to go. The book treatment was better, but man alive Miz and Morrison are dragging these things down.

Sheamus vs. AJ Styles

Sheamus takes him into the corner and hammers away so AJ needs a breather on the floor. Back in and AJ scores with some kicks to the head to slow Sheamus down a bit. Sheamus is fine enough to hit a knee to the face, only to have AJ start kicking at the leg. That just earns AJ another shot to the face and a toss suplex.

It works so well that Sheamus does it again but AJ knocks him outside. Sheamus catches the dive on his shoulders but Omos intercepts a powerbomb attempt. The staredown is on and we take a break. Back with AJ working away on the leg and kicking away in the corner, only to get caught in the Irish Curse.

Sheamus sends him flying and gets two off a knee to the face. AJ grabs a quick Calf Crusher to send Sheamus bailing to the ropes and a quick White Noise gives Sheamus two. With nothing else working, Sheamus loads up a super White Noise but AJ slips out and goes for the knee again, setting up the rollup pin at 15:52.

Rating: B. They beat each other up for a long time here with the knee work playing into the ending. I’m not sure what else you can ask for out of a match like this, which shows you what throwing a Christmas tree can do. Sheamus doesn’t lose anything by losing to AJ and AJ gets a nice win. Not bad for one match.

Post match AJ talks trash so Sheamus grabs him, only for Omos to pull him into the ropes to tie him up. AJ unloads with chair shots to the legs and ribs to leave Sheamus mostly out of it.

The Hurt Business harasses a member of the production crew who is eating a Bronut and wearing a Riddle hat. He just found the hat and offers them a bronut, which earns him some milk over his head. With the crew member gone, the team promises to destroy the New Day and Riddle.

Riddle comes up to New Day and Jeff Hardy and since everyone misses Big E., he should be Bro E. against the Hurt Business later. New Day seems to agree.

Jeff Hardy/New Day vs. Hurt Business

Riddle and MVP are here too. Lashley runs over Woods to start but Woods kicks him in the ribs and brings Kofi in. That earns Kofi a gorilla press toss, though Alexander tagging himself in doesn’t sit well with Lashley. It’s off to Hardy, who sends Alexander into the corner. That earns him a kick to the ribs though and Shelton comes in to slug away.

Hardy knocks Shelton off the apron though and the rest of the Hurt Business follows, meaning it’s time for a trombone concert to send us to a break. Back with Kofi jumping over Shelton in the corner and hitting a clothesline. The Boom Drop connects but Lashley breaks up Trouble in Paradise. Alexander slams Kofi head first into the mat and Shelton bends Kofi’s back around the ropes.

Lashley elbows him down in the corner and the stomping continues. Kofi finally fights up and rolls over for the hot tag to Jeff to pick up the pace. Alexander takes Jeff down and talks a lot of trash, only to get caught in a Russian legsweep. Everything breaks down and Woods dives onto Lashley on the floor, only to get pulled out of the air. Lashley throws Woods around and head back inside where the Hurt Lock finishes Hardy at 15:53.

Rating: C+. Another long match here with both teams getting to look good. The Hurt Business is turning into one of the better teams in a good while on Raw and I could go for seeing a lot more of them in the future. It’s also nice to not have the makeshift team beat the established one, making this a rather fine use of a good chunk of the show.

We look back at least week with Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler and Asuka/Lana firing each other up. Lana is still scared of Nia because of course.

Asuka says that even though Lana is scared of Nia, she can go out there and fight anyway. Lana agrees, which Asuka says makes her brave.

Lana vs. Nia Jax

Nia shoves her down to start and then takes it into the corner for a splash. Lana manages a hurricanrana and kicks Nia down, only to get headbutted on top. The super Samoan drop is escaped though and Lana pulls Nia down into a cradle for the fluke pin at 1:45.

Post match Shayna Baszler jumps Asuka in the back as Nia beats Lana up. Shayna comes out and snaps Lana’s arm before stomping on the leg. Lana’s boot is taken off so Shayna can work on the leg even more, including Nia hitting a legdrop onto the leg. Asuka finally comes in for the save as the Lana sympathy is cranked up even more. Still not exactly working, but this was more of a classic formula as Lana actually did SOMETHING for once. Granted the fact that it was her first singles match win in two and a half years (and second ever), maybe they’re slowly starting to figure it out.

Here’s Elias, who introduces Jaxson Ryker as his new associate. Ryker understands the universal truth, which is that WWE stands for WALK WITH ELIAS. Ryker talks about how Elias’ music has changed him for the better and now he is going to change WWE. Elias starts playing but here’s R-Truth to interrupt. He apologizes for interrupting Elias’ performance last week on Main Event because he isn’t an interrupter. The song starts again but here’s the menagerie of numskulls to chase Truth. Ryker takes them out for a change, allowing Truth to leave.

Miz and John Morrison talk strategy to take the WWE Title but here’s Keith Lee with a coin. Miz calls heads before the toss or even knowing the stakes, but Lee says they both win, meaning pain is coming.

Keith Lee vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz gets knocked to the floor to start so Morrison slaps Lee in the face, which goes as well as you would expect. Some double teaming has Lee in some trouble though and a knee to the face puts him down. That earns Morrison a toss into the air for a crash to the mat. The Pounce (or at least Lee getting close to him) sends Morrison flying over the top and we take a break.

Back with Miz hitting the short DDT into Morrison’s standing shooting star press for two. Miz is sent crashing to the floor, where he trips Lee down to break up a suplex on Morrison. Back in and Lee suplexes both of them at once but Morrison slips out of the Spirit Bomb. Miz gets in a shot from behind so Morrison can hit the Flying Chuck, setting up the double pin on Lee at 10:01.

Rating: D+. Well it’s a good thing that we make sure to keep Mr. Money in the Bank and his comedy partner strong by having Lee lose again. We’re firmly to the point now where Lee is in a free fall and that’s a scary thought to imagine. Miz and Morrison have been one of the weakest things on the show for months now and here they get to pin Lee. All to set up what is likely going to be a failed cash in several weeks if not months from now. How generous of them.

We look back at Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt from last week, with Bray turning into the Fiend to end the show.

Here’s Bray Wyatt for a road trip, complete with the puppets on the other side of the barricade. Bray is glad to be here but he needs to apologize to Randy Orton for everything that has been happening in recent weeks. Things have gotten out of hand and the Fiend has a mind of his own. After Orton takes Him on this Sunday, Bray isn’t sure what is going to be left of Randy.

It won’t be any fun and games because all that is left is sadness. Yowie Wowie that’s alright! There won’t be any fun and games on Sunday, so Bray has prepared some jokes for tonight and they are going to be HYSTERICAL. What’s the best way to measure a viper? In inches, because they don’t have any feet. What do snakes use to clean their car windows? Windshield vipers! That one knocks Bray to his knees but here’s Orton on the screen to interrupt.

Orton talks about how the Fiend changed him last week, just like Bray changed into the Fiend. For the first time in a long time, Orton was outmaneuvered by Him, so tonight, Bray should come see him. Tonight, they can play a game of hide and seek. Bray loves the idea and accepts so Orton says come find him. The puppets approve as Bray says let the games begin. More on this later.

Mace vs. Ricochet

Mustafa Ali is on commentary. Mace sends him into the corner for a running elbow, followed by the elbows to the face. We hit the chinlock but Ricochet fights up and kicks Mace down. The running shooting star press gets two (second time we’ve seen that move in two matches) but Ricochet has to fight off the rest of Retribution. A chokebomb gives Mace two and a fireman’s carry spun around into a slam (kind of like an Air Raid Crash but without trapping the leg) for the pin on Ricochet at 2:55.

Post match Ali says this isn’t over with Ricochet until it’s over.

Bray Wyatt goes to find Orton and asks if Riddle has seen him. Riddle: “Hey bro.” Bray: “Actually it’s Bray.” Riddle has a new idea: Bro Nouns (he has a Venn diagram), which would be great for an episode of Firefly Fun House. Bray leaves but Ramblin Rabbit pops up. Riddle dubs him Bro Baby Yoda and has him sign a carrot for his rabbit named Skipper. This was one of the more bizarre things I’ve ever seen.

Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia is here with Shayna. During the entrances, we’re told that Lana is out of TLC due to the attack earlier. Asuka will still get a title shot, but with a mystery partner. Shayna kicks her into the corner to start but Brook avoids the arm stomp. Dana goes up top, where Nia shoves her down for the DQ at 1:23.

Post match Mandy Rose runs in for the save with a kendo stick. Asuka runs in to help with the fight and the good women stand tall.

R-Truth talks to Huskus the Pig when Bray comes up to say Huskus shouldn’t talk to strangers. Truth thinks Bray is Huskus’ father, so Bray says HIDE AND SEEK and runs off. Truth: “What a beautiful family.”

Post break Bray goes looking for Randy but finds an empty, shaking rocking chair. Bray has a seat and Orton pops up behind him for the beatdown. Orton sends him into various things and then locks Bray inside a wooden case. He whips out a well placed can of gasoline and pours it on said crate, which is then set on fire. The Fiend pops up and Mandible Claws Orton. This ends the most obvious surprise in recent memory, but Orton’s face helped a lot.

Back from a break and we look back at what we just saw.

Riddle vs. MVP

MVP forearms away to start but misses the running boot in the corner. Riddle hits the Final Flash and the Floating Bro is good for the pin at 48 seconds.

Bobby Lashley runs out for the beatdown but Riddle escapes with the bronuts. I’d like to point out that Randy Orton tried to LIGHT BRAY WYATT ON FIRE a few minutes ago and now it’s Riddle talking about how he’s having a sugary treat.

It’s time for the Championship Ascension Ceremony so here are AJ Styles and Drew McIntyre with Tom Phillips in the ring. AJ says Drew doesn’t need to address him, but rather the title, because he won’t be having it around his waist again. This is going to be their first ever singles match so maybe AJ needs to find out a little more about McIntyre. AJ can’t believe that it took Drew nineteen years to get here but AJ is ready to use every table, ladder and chair to get the title back.

Drew calls that an impressive speech and says he has always wanted to face AJ. This Sunday, the match is TLC and no, he has never been in one before. Drew says he thought his goal was to win the WWE Title but the loss and second win changed everything for him. It is so much harder to stay champion and he was the man who lead WWE through uncharted waters. He’s a frickin diamond and he’s ready for AJ on Sunday. Every man dies but not every man truly lives, so on Sunday he’s willing to do whatever it takes to remain champion.

The title is raised up but AJ says he isn’t the only person Drew is facing on Sunday. Cue Miz and Morrison to jump Drew, who fights them all off and throws a ladder to the floor. Omos throws in the steps for a distraction though and AJ chop blocks Drew down (nice move after setting it up earlier tonight against Sheamus). The Phenomenal Forearm connects and AJ adds some ladder shots. AJ tells Omos to throw in some more stuff so we get a table and another ladder. Various other shots let AJ climb the ladder to pull down the title…and we cut off with Tom in the middle of his big close.

Overall Rating: C. The first hour of this was rather good but then it started to go downhill in a hurry. The biggest problem with this show is TLC is mostly set already, leaving little for this show to cover. There were some good matches, but seeing Miz and Morrison beat Lee and Lana being pulled from the match that they have spent three and a half months building (though it wouldn’t shock me to see her wrestle anyway) was a bit deflating. The show wasn’t awful, but it’s one you can almost completely skip (Sheamus vs. AJ was good), which isn’t the best way to set up a pay per view.

Results

AJ Styles b. Sheamus – Rollup

Hurt Business b. Jeff Hardy/New Day – Hurt Lock to Hardy

Lana b. Nia Jax – Cradle

John Morrison/Miz b. Keith Lee – Double pin

Mace b. Ricochet – Fireman’s carry spun into a slam

Dana Brooke b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Riddle b. MVP – Floating Bro

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 7, 2020: Cut It Down

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 7, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

We’re less than two weeks away from Tables, Ladders And Chairs and that means we are almost to the end of this version of the Thunderdome. Things are getting a little more interesting around here and hopefully we get something better on the way to the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the locker room on the stage again for another ten bell salute to Pat Patterson. There aren’t many people who deserve it more.

Here’s Randy Orton to get things going. After a look back at last week when he was a guest on A Moment Of Bliss and seemed to get inside the Fiend’s head by messing with Bliss, Orton talks about how he got rid of his moral compass years ago. Orton is the kind of monster that Bray should be afraid of so worry about who is there when you let him in.

Cue Bray in the Firefly Fun House to say Orton gets little old him tonight. Orton says he isn’t in the mood for games…..so Bray says it’s time to play the fireflies’ favorite game show: Let’s Get Randy. Bray now has a bad wig and a microphone and sends us to the three contestants: Mercy the Buzzard, Ramblin Rabbit and Huskus the Pig. The prizes tonight is a brand new cruces (no idea if I spelled that right) but it’s made from the Tree of Knowledge and forged by St. Louis’ greatest shaman, and the rotting corpse of Friendship the Frog!

The question tonight is how should Orton be punished at TLC. The contestants give their answers, with Rabbit thinking they should sit down and discuss their feelings. Bray: “That’s revolting. You’re sick. Sick.” The solution, with the wig coming off, is coming from the Fiend….who doesn’t actually say anything. Instead Orton says he wants to face Bray tonight because he can face the Fiend at TLC. Bray is down for that.

Nia Jax says that it’s time for Shayna Baszler to destroy Lana for good. Shayna says Lana’s front is going to look like her back and her back is going to look like her front. Jax: “She’s going to have boobs on her back.”

Shayna Baszler vs. Asuka

Non-title and Lana and Nia Jax are at ringside. They go straight to the mat for an exchange of leglocks, with Nia getting a heel hook, Asuka reverses into an ankle lock and then a kneebar but Baszler is out in a hurry. Baszler sends her hard to the floor and we take a break. Back with Baszler working on the arm but Asuka reverses into a rollup for two.

Baszler fires off the kicks to the ribs but Asuka gets the knees up in the corner for a breather. The Kirifuda Clutch is countered with a backflip into a cradle so Asuka tries the Asuka Lock. That’s broken up as Jax goes after Lana, earning herself a trip into the steps. Lana dives at Jax and manages a hurricanrana into the announcers’ table. Baszler can’t believe this and yells at Lana, who runs off so Asuka can roll Baszler up for the pin at 8:38.

Rating: C. This was a nice exchange of submission work until it became about Lana and Jax again because that has been the case for months now. Other than that, we have Baszler losing again because WWE managed to another match between the two most successful NXT Women’s Champions ever and it winds up being about Lana and Jax, because it’s always about Jax in some way.

We look back at Cedric Alexander beating Xavier Woods last week. Therefore, tonight we have Kofi Kingston vs. Shelton Benjamin because that’s one of WWE’s favorites.

The Hurt Business ran into a guy holding a box of shirts and torment him a bit, as only they can.

We recap last week’s main event, with the combined forces of AJ Styles, John Morrison and Miz not being able to take out Drew McIntyre and Sheamus. Tonight, the combined forces of AJ Styles, John Morrison and Miz try to take out Drew McIntyre and Sheamus.

We look back at Dana Brooke slapping Mustafa Ali in the face last week, leading to Slapjack beating Ricochet. Then later in the night, Dana beat Reckoning in quite the upset.

Riddle brings Dana Brooke and Ricochet some Bronuts, which are part of his idea for MVP. With Riddle gone, Ricochet says he didn’t want to be in Retribution because they’ll all jackasses. He’ll team with Brooke though because they both want to take out Retribution.

Ricochet/Dana Brooke vs. Slapjack/Reckoning

Mustafa Ali is here with Slapjack and Reckoning. Before the match, Retribution promises to end Brooke and Ricochet tonight. Reckoning slaps Brooke to start and the brawl is on early. It’s off to the guys with Ricochet taking Slapjack to the floor for a big flip dive. Back in and Slapjack hits something like a Falcon Arrow for two before it’s back to the women. Brooke grabs a quick Samoan driver for the pin at 1:47. Remember when Retribution went on a winning streak for like two weeks and it seemed that things were getting better? WWE must not have been paying attention.

Post match Ali yells at Reckoning and Slapjack for embarrassing them and storms off.

Keith Lee comes up to Sheamus and knows it’s a matter of time before he turns on Drew McIntyre. Sheamus doesn’t like the sound of that.

It’s time for MizTV (including John Morrison, as usual) with AJ Styles, with Omos, as the guest. Omos is offered a chair but AJ says the big tree prefers to stand. Morrison asks AJ about his plans for the TLC match against Drew McIntyre, so AJ talks about wanting to break a chair over Drew’s back. Miz and Morrison start making fun of Sheamus and McIntyre’s accents as the show morphs into the Dirt Sheet. The gist is that Sheamus is going to turn on McIntyre, with the accents getting thicker and thicker. They attribute the voices to watching a lot of Liam Neeson and Shrek movies but here’s Sheamus to interrupt.

Sheamus knows everyone is going to believe he’s turning on McIntyre, but Miz and Morrison mock his inability to count. There are three of them and one of him, so what is Sheamus supposed to do? Cue McIntyre to say the odds have been against him before and he’s ready to take care of these two again. He knows Miz keeps his testicles in Maryse’s purse but Miz replaced them with Morrison’s when he made Morrison his sidekick b****.

AJ points out that Omos is here too….but they’re on the floor so McIntyre and Sheamus clear the ring. McIntyre throws the MITB briefcase from the ring to the stage (dang) and Miz is distraught. Miz and Morrison still do not feel like anything more than an annoyance to McIntyre and it’s not holding up.

We look back at the opening segment.

Kofi Kingston vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton takes him down to start and fires off a few shots in the corner to keep Kofi in trouble. Kofi gets up and jumps over Shelton out of the corner, only to have the SOS countered into a heck of a powerbomb for two. Shelton slaps on the ankle lock and then sends Kofi outside, where Kofi is favoring his leg. A charge only hits the barricade though and it’s Trouble in Paradise for the pin back inside at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Kind of a weird match here, which didn’t have much time to do anything and only served to get New Day even with the Hurt Business after last week. I was surprised by how fast it wrapped up but sometimes you don’t need to keep things going for the sake of filling time. Kofi getting the win is all that mattered and it worked out fine.

Post match Cedric says not so fast because he wants Kofi too. That’s cool with Kofi and the match is on after a break.

Kofi Kingston vs. Cedric Alexander

Joined in progress with Alexander working on the bad knee, including cranking on the leg on the mat. Kofi fights up and sends him outside, followed by the SOS for two back inside. Cedric takes the leg out again though and a brainbuster gets two. The superplex is broken up but Kofi misses the top rope shot to the head. The Lumbar Check finishes Kofi at 4:20.

Rating: C-. I can go for Cedric picking up some big wins and even though it wasn’t clean, this does set up the Tag Team Title match at TLC. Now granted I’m not sure why we’re going to be seeing another title shot for the Hurt Business, especially a Tag Team Title shot based off of singles wins, but I’ll take almost anything from the Hurt Business. Alexander got a lot of of this win too, even given the situation.

We look back at Elias getting electrocuted last week against Jeff Hardy, who thankfully didn’t bust his head open on the steps.

Pat Patterson tribute video.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Sheamus/Drew McIntyre vs. Miz/John Morrison/AJ Styles

McIntyre shoves Morrison around to start and there’s a headbutt to drop him again. Sheamus comes in and trades arm holds with Morrison before hitting him in the face. Miz gets knocked outside and Sheamus and Morrison follow, where Sheamus almost knocks McIntyre down. Instead, the two of them catch a diving Morrison and toss him onto the announcers’ chairs (geez) as we take a break.

Back with Miz getting planted off a double toss suplex as the dominance continues. Miz gets in a shot to the face and hands it off to AJ to hammer away in the corner. Morrison gets to do the same but Miz gets knocked away without much trouble. That means it’s back to Sheamus to wreck Miz a bit, only to have Morrison get in a shot to the face. A double shot to the back gets two on Sheamus and it’s time for some right hands to the face. Morrison flips over Sheamus and grabs a gator roll before handing it back to AJ.

Some right hands in the corner have Sheamus in trouble and a kick to the head makes it worse. The Calf Crusher goes on but Drew breaks that up in a hurry. That allows the hot tag to Morrison, who starts sending Morrison flying (so much that one of the cameras is sent reeling). A double northern lights suplex has Miz and Morrison down again as everything breaks down. The Brogue Kick hits McIntyre by mistake and it’s the Phenomenal Forearm to finish Sheamus at 15:47.

Rating: D+. This took its sweet time getting somewhere but the ending was the right call. Sheamus feels like a much bigger threat to McIntyre than Miz and Morrison and AJ is the biggest threat out of all of them. In other words, they have a good story in there but Miz and Morrison are just kind of there to clog things up.

We look at Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler wanting to destroy Lana. Next week: Lana vs. Jax.

Lana is panicking so Asuka gives her a pep talk. She is going to beat Nia and the win the Tag Team Titles. Asuka leaves and Nia pops up to stare Lana down.

Sheamus knows McIntyre is going to want a fight and he’s ready. That Brogue Kick was NOT intentional but here’s Drew to interrupt. Charly Caruso knows better than to stick around as Drew says Sheamus knows what is about to happen. A lot of breathing ensues.

We come back from a break with Sheamus and McIntyre fighting but Pat Buck breaks it up. That earns him a big slam through a table and Sheamus and McIntyre are cool again.

Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. Hold on though as Riddle comes up to Jeff in the back and suggest a tag team: the Hardy Bros. Jeff politely declines because he needs to head to the ring. Lashley takes him into the corner to start and the stomping starts early. Some choking makes it worse and MVP is right there to mock Jeff. The Dominator is countered though and Jeff strikes away, only to have the Twist of Fate countered into a failed Hurt Lock attempt.

MVP offers a distraction to break up the Whisper in the Wind so here’s Riddle to take MVP off the apron. Hardy sends Lashley outside for a clothesline off the apron. We take a break and come back with Hardy being sent outside, meaning Lashley gets to yell at Riddle. The Hurt Lock is countered so Lashley settles for rolling Hardy into a rear naked choke. Riddle tries to coach Hardy out of trouble and Hardy rolls over to elbow his way to freedom.

The legdrop between the legs into a basement dropkick gets two on Lashley. Back up and Lashley hits a quick Downward Spiral for two, only to have Hardy come back with the Twist of Fate. It’s too early for the Swanton though and Lashley spears Hardy in half. The Hurt Lock finishes Hardy at 13:13.

Rating: B-. I got into this one and they did a good job of making me want to see Riddle vs. Lashley. There’s something awesome about Riddle going serious and turning into the machine but you have to build Lashley up as well. A win over someone of Hardy’s caliber is going to do just that and it was another good match on the way there.

Ramblin Rabbit knocks on Randy Orton’s door, saying Bray can’t wait to see him.

Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray shoves him around to start and they head outside with Orton being dropped onto the announcers’ table. Bray grabs a headset and says yowie wowie we’ll be right back to send us to a break. Back with Bray in trouble and Orton chokes away in the corner. The stomping sets up the chinlock but Bray fights up and goes Pat Patterson with an atomic drop.

Bray’s crossbody sets up an implant DDT for two but Orton reverses Sister Abigail into the backbreaker. A quick trip to the floor doesn’t work for either of them so Orton pokes him in the eye back inside. The hanging DDT connects but then the lights start going out. The RKO connects on Bray but the lights go out….and Orton is covering the Fiend. It’s the Mandible Claw to put Orton down to end the show as we’ll say the match was a no contest at 11:45.

Rating: C. This wasn’t much to see but the ending was a good way to go. The Fiend running through Orton at the pay per view could be interesting if that’s the way they go, but it doesn’t hurt anything if Orton gets the better of Wyatt. It isn’t like Bray got pinned or anything so this was just a way to get to the ending, which worked out fine.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had one of the worst feelings you can have from Raw: it felt like a three hour show. They did move a few things forward and the Raw half of TLC does look pretty good (not entirely, but more good than bad) but Miz and Morrison and the Lana stuff are really dragging it down. It feels like those people are dragging down the good stuff because they have to be there and that’s not a great thing to have taking place. Overall the show wasn’t the worst, but it REALLY would have been better off at two hours instead of three.

Results

Asuka b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Ricochet/Dana Brooke b. Slapjack/Reckoning – Samoan driver to Reckoning

Kofi Kingston b. Shelton Benjamin – Trouble in Paradise

Cedric Alexander b. Kofi Kingston – Lumbar Check

AJ Styles/Miz/John Morrison b. Sheamus/Drew McIntyre – Phenomenal Forearm to Sheamus

Bobby Lashley b. Jeff Hardy – Hurt Lock

Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt went to a no contest

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: The Lana Problem

There are only so many ways around this kind of issue.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-lana-problem/