Monday Night Raw
Date: October 9, 2023
Location: Chi Health Center Omaha, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

We’re done with Fastlane and that means things are moving on towards Crown Jewel and Survivor Series next month. That should make for some big matches being set up in the coming weeks, though it might take some time for those to come together. For now though, Seth Rollins is still the World Heavyweight Champion. Let’s get to it.

Here is Fastlane if you need a recap.

We open with a Fastlane recap.

Here is Seth Rollins to get things going by bragging about his victory in the Last Man Standing match over Shinsuke Nakamura. He didn’t know if he was going to get back up, but he did. He didn’t know if he was going to keep Nakamura down, but he did. Then he went to the back and the adrenaline wore off, which is when he realized his back was still broken.

Being the World Heavyweight Champion has been one of the best honors of his career…and then he pauses for a good bit. He wants us to know that he is JUST GETTING STARTED. He’ll fight anyone anytime anywhere but maybe he can go one week without having to fight for his life out here. Maybe we could sing and drink a bit, but here is Drew McIntyre to interrupt. Rollins: “You want a World Heavyweight Title shot don’t you?”

McIntyre nods so Rollins says he’s ready to go get his gear on but McIntyre says he’s willing to wait for Rollins to be 100%. Maybe at Crown Jewel? Rollins: “So you’re not out here to jump me?” McIntyre: “Nope.” Rollins: “And you want me at 100%?” McIntyre: “Bingo.” That works for Rollins, so they’re on at Crown Jewel.

McIntyre is fine with that and says if you see him out tonight, buy him a pint and a shot, and then he’s out. Cue Damian Priest from behind to jump Rollins, with McIntyre watching from the aisle. Priest waves out Dominik Mysterio with the briefcase but McIntyre cuts him off. The briefcase is tossed at the Titantron and Rollins is back up to clear the ring.

Kofi Kingston vs. Ivar

Viking Rules match, meaning there are viking shields around the apron. Ivar starts fast and knocks him to the floor, where Kofi hits a big dive (and almost lands on his head). The table is loaded up but Ivar knocks him onto the apron for quite the splash. Kofi kicks him away though and hits a splash onto Ivar’s back for two on the floor. We take a break and come back with Ivar missing a flag shot and being sent through one of the shields. The SOS gives Kofi two but it’s too early for the Boom Drop.

Instead Ivar grabs a Jeff Cobb Tour of the Islands for two, followed by a tiger driver for the same. Ivar kicks him in the face and goes up, only to be thrown down (by the beard) through a table at ringside. Cue Valhalla to dive onto Kofi so here is Xavier Woods to…be scared by Valhalla. Ivar crushes Woods against the barricade but Kofi kicks him in the face. Back in and Ivar counters Trouble In Paradise into a drive through the table, setting up the moonsault to finish Kingston at 11:05.

Rating: B-. Good brawl here with both of them beating the other up well enough. Ivar FINALLY wins a singles match as he’s in the middle of his singles run, which is pretty long overdue. Other than that, this wasn’t as good as their surprisingly awesome match from a few weeks ago, but the right person won.

Shinsuke Nakamura has no comment on the Last Man Standing match but here is Ricochet to jump him for the brawl.

Damian Priest yells at JD McDonagh and the rest of Judgment Day for not having his back out there. Rhea Ripley calms him down because she has gotten Priest and Finn Balor a rematch for the Tag Team Titles next week. And Priest still has the briefcase! Priest backs off, but McDonagh needs to deal with Drew McIntyre.

Raquel Rodriguez vs. Nia Jax

Nia runs her over to start and slams Rodriguez’s head into the mat a few times. Rodriguez fights up and unloads in the corner but can’t manage a slam. Jax throws her outside and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Rodriguez fighting out of a chinlock and knocking Jax down. A Samoan drop doesn’t work for Rodriguez either but it works just fine for Jax. The Annihilator takes too long though and Rodriguez hits a rather impressive powerbomb. Cue Rhea Ripley to throw Rodriguez outside for the DQ at 7:09 so she can go after Jax.

Rating: C+. The powerbomb looked great but this was a means to set up the ending of the match and that’s perfectly fine. We’re either setting up Ripley vs. Jax (probably the long term goal) or a triple threat match for the title. Either way, Ripley continues to feel like a star and having her slay the giant would work great for her. Rodriguez handled herself well enough here and that’s all you can ask in a situation like this one.

Post match Ripley kicks Jax down but gets jumped by Rodriguez. Shayna Baszler runs in to go after Jax but Ripley breaks that up and yells. Baszler drops Ripley with a German suplex and running knee as Jax bails. This is already more interesting than a lot of what we’ve seen around the women’s division in recent months.

Seth Rollins tells Drew McIntyre that they’re officially on for Crown Jewel, but what’s up with him cutting off the cash in? McIntyre says he hasn’t told a single lie because last week he said if it’s not his business, he doesn’t get along. He has a title shot at Crown Jewel and doesn’t want someone messing with it. Rollins says McIntyre isn’t taking the title from him and leaves.

Shayna Baszler says no one jumps her from behind in her ring and gets away with it.

Michael Cole brings out new Tag Team Champions Jey Uso and Cody Rhodes for a chat. Cole puts over their win but asks Rhodes what this means for his original goal of finishing the story. Will defending the Tag Team Titles deter him from winning the WWE Title, or is he scared of trying again after failing in his first attempt? Rhodes says Cole is right that he did bring Uso back to Raw and he’s happy with being a Tag Team Champion. Cole doesn’t let his question go but cue Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens (to different music) to interrupt.

Sami says everyone is talking about finishing the story. One story is the Usos holding the Tag Team Titles longer than anyone in history, but then he and Owens took the titles in the main event of Wrestlemania. The story now though is Cody and Uso winning the titles and Sami is happy for them.

Sami has mixed emotions though as he thinks they should be holding the titles. Owens is a little more to the point, saying he’s not happy that Rhodes and Uso are holding the titles. Owens wants them back so he wants to challenge them for tonight, but he doesn’t think Uso can handle losing to them twice. Cody says they’re on and Uso is in too.

Otis chops Chad Gable to ire him up for his #1 contenders match tonight. Bronson Reed (also in the match tonight) comes in to say Gable isn’t getting near the Intercontinental Title, because Reed is getting the shot tonight. Maybe Gable shouldn’t let his daughter watch tonight because it’s going to be another heartbreaking loss.

Ricochet vs. Bronson Reed vs. Chad Gable

For an Intercontinental Title shot next week. Ricochet comes out first but Shinsuke Nakamura jumps him from behind and bets him down, including a GTS. Maxxine Dupri is here with Gable. Reed starts fast and knocks Ricochet into the corner but Ricochet is fine enough to cut off a suplex attempt. They go outside with Ricochet kneeing Reed out of the air but Gable suplexes Ricochet and we take a break.

Back with Reed breaking up Gable’s sleeper and splashing both of them in the corner. A Samoan drop crushes both Ricochet and Gable but Ricochet manages a kick to Reed’s head. Ricochet’s missile dropkick sends Reed to the floor but Gable is right back up. A springboard spinning crossbody puts Gable down and a running shooting star press gets two.

Gable manages a German suplex to send Reed right back to the floor, where Ricochet hits a running flip dive. Back in and the ankle lock has Ricochet in trouble but he escapes rather quickly. Gable loads up a German superplex but Ricochet flips out, only to hurt his knee again. Gable’s Rolling Chaos Theory hits Ricochet but Reed crushes both of them. The Tsunami crushes Ricochet to give Reed the pin and the title shot at 11:02.

Rating: B-. They kept things moving here and it was an entertaining match throughout. Reed vs. Gunther is certainly a fresh match and has some serious hoss fight potential. If nothing else, it’s not to see Reed getting a move up the ladder, which has been teased for a long time now. Gable not getting pinned gives him an out for later as his obsession can continue. Finally there is Ricochet, who seems primed for a match with Shinsuke Nakamura down the line.

Becky Lynch has 11 stitches in her arm but she’ll be ready to fight tonight because that’s what a fighting champion does. Xia Li of all people comes up to say she wants a shot, with Lynch saying she’s not a hard person to find.

Drew McIntyre vs. JD McDonagh

Dominik Mysterio is here with McDonagh. McIntyre starts fast with one of the highest backdrops I’ve ever seen. Dominik offers a distraction though and McDonagh starts in on the leg. Back up and McIntyre avoids a charge, setting up the Future Shock. The Claymore finishes McDonagh at 3:59.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but what matters is getting McIntyre a win and giving McDonagh another failure. McIntyre is still in a weird place and I’m not sure where it is going to wind up. That makes things more interesting on the way to Crown Jewel and things could get all the more fun on the way there.

Post match Damian Priest and Rhea Ripley are not pleased.

We get a sitdown interview from earlier today with Wade Barrett talking to Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa. This reunion was seven years in the making and now they’re looking to the future. Gargano says he has been ready to return for a long time and saw what happened last week. He wasn’t about to let that happen but here is Imperium to jump them. A big beatdown ensues.

Video on Tegan Nox, looking at her history of terrible knee injuries.

Nox is ready for the biggest match of her career. Natalya pops in to wish her luck.

Ricochet is given a match with Shinsuke Nakamura next week, falls count anywhere. Of note, Drew McIntyre and Rhea Ripley appeared to be talking in the background.

NXT Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Tegan Nox

Lynch is defending. Nox takes her down to start but misses an early kick to the face. They trade some rollups with neither getting very far, though Lynch does seem to lose some extensions. Some armdrags have Nox down and they’re back up for a stalemate. Nox kicks her out of the corner and Lynch gets sent into some buckles.

They head outside with Lynch’s arm getting banged up again, allowing Nox to get two back inside. We take a break and come back with Lynch snapping off a suplex for two. Nox’s high crossbody gets the same but Lynch throws her down into a failed cross armbreaker attempt. Nox sends her into the corner for the reverse cannonball, followed b a kick to the head.

Lynch gets tied in the Tree of Woe for a regular Cannonball and another near fall. A cross armbreaker doesn’t work for Nox either and Lynch is up with a missile dropkick for two of her own. The Manhandle Slam and Disarm-Her are blocked and Nox gets a rollup for two. The Disarm-Her goes on this time though and Nox has to tap at 14:29.

Rating: B. They’re doing something interesting here with Lynch being the fighting champion who helps give a bunch of people their best match to date. That’s similar to the John Cena US Open Challenges from back in the date and it’s working well. Lynch is going to drop the title in a big deal but she gave Nox and Tiffany Stratton a nice platform on the way there. Good match here, with Nox getting in a lot.

Post match, respect is shown.

Indi Hartwell and Candice LeRae are in Adam Pearce’s office when Rhea Ripley comes in to throw them out. She needs to make an example of Shayna Baszler next week so Pearce needs to make it happen.

Natalya, Kayden Carter and Katana Chance console Tegan Nox after their loss when Piper Niven and Chelsea Green come in to mock her. Green and Natalya go face to face, with Niven doing the threatening. Natalya vs. Niven is made for next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Drew McIntyre gets in Jey Uso’s face and Uso is ready to go. Sami Zayn plays peacemaker again. With McIntyre gone, Uso says he appreciates Zayn having his back but it’s go time tonight. Zayn doesn’t have to be told twice.

Video on Ludwig Kaiser of all people.

Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Jey Uso vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Zayn/Owens are challenging. Sami and Cody start things off but we get an early four way staredown to take us to a quick break. Back with Sami getting frustrated as Uso comes in, meaning it’s off to Owens. Everything breaks down and the four way brawl is on outside. They break it up before the double DQ/countout but the fight goes outside again and we take another break.

Back again with Owens and Uso trading superkicks until they both make tags. Sami Blue Thunder Bombs Cody for two and they both need a breather. Cross Rhodes gives Cody two with Owens making the save. Owens and Uso come back in to trade superkicks again with Uso getting the better of things. The Superfly Splash misses though and Owens hits the Stunner, with Cody having to make the save this time. Owens drops Uso and goes up but the Swanton hits raised knees. The elevated Cody Cutter drops Owens and the champs retain at 21:09.

Rating: B. This got a lot of time, though a good chunk of that was taken away due to the commercials. What matters here though is having a heck of a showdown and Cody and Uso getting a big win to make it clear that they’re legitimate champions, at least for the time being. Good main event here, and we’re likely going to be in for another big match next week against Judgment Day.

We get another preview of next week’s show.

Sami shakes the champs’ hands and Owens shakes Cody’s hand. He gives Uso an aggressive handshake to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Pretty nice show overall here, with good wrestling up and down and stuff being set up for both next week as well as Crown Jewel. I’m curious to see where some of these things go and that is a good sign at the end of a show. It can be hard to come off of a not so important pay per view but at least they’re off to a strong start on the way to Crown Jewel and then Survivor Series. Nice work this week.

Results
Ivar b. Kofi Kingston – Moonsault
Raquel Rodriguez b. Nia Jax via DQ when Rhea Ripley interfered
Bronson Reed b. Ricochet and Chad Gable – Tsunami to Ricochet
Drew McIntyre b. JD McDonagh – Claymore
Becky Lynch b. Tegan Nox – Disarm-Her
Cody Rhodes/Jey Uso b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – Cody 1D to Owens

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 2, 2023
Location: SAP Center, San Jose, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

It’s the last Raw before Fastlane and thankfully the card has crown a bit. Granted by grown I mean there are now four matches so there are still quite a few slots that need to be filled. There is a good chance that some of those spots can be filled this week, as they’re kind of out of time otherwise. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We join the show with a fight in progress between Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax, who are scheduled to face each other tonight. They get in the ring with Baszler grabbing the Kirifuda Clutch but being driven into the corner to break it up. Raquel Rodriguez runs in to brawl with Jax but stops to go after Baszler, allowing Jax to drop her.

Cue Rhea Ripley (looking like a superhero) to double leg Jax but Rodriguez jumps her as well. Agents and security run in to break it up, with Ripley being left in the ring to a heck of a MAMI chant. She says she’s not done yet and orders Judgment Day to get out here for a talk. Cue Judgment Day (minus Finn Balor) and after a break, Ripley says they have some business to tend to.

There is no leader in the Judgment Day but they all have responsibilities. Right Dom? She left her responsibility to Priest, and look what happened. He’s not medically cleared to compete tonight, Finn Balor is hurt, and Dom LOST at No Mercy. Priest says people are coming for the titles but he’s going to shove back harder. He has his titles and his briefcase, but where is Dom’s title? The fans want to know as well, but Ripley says you’re welcome for his rematch tomorrow night on NXT.

Either win the title, or don’t bother coming home. Cue Jey Uso to interrupt but Priest isn’t interested. Jey says Ripley has more testicular fortitude than Roman Reigns ever did, but Priest is tired of hearing him open his mouth. Dominik says he’s got this so Priest goes to the floor, leaving Jey to drop Mysterio for a superkick. Cue JD McDonagh to jump Jey and the double teaming is on. House is cleared, and Adam Pearce comes in to make Judgment Day vs. Uso/Rhodes for the Tag Team Titles at Fastlane.

Alpha Academy vs. Imperium

Maxxine Dupri is here too. Gable and Kaiser trade headlocks to start with Kaiser getting the better of things. Vinci comes in and gets suplexed but Kaiser pulls him to the floor. Otis backdrops Gable most of the way to the floor (that didn’t look great) and we take a break. Back with Gable being sent shoulder first into the post so a running dropkick can put him on the floor.

Vinci drops Gable with a hard clothesline and Kaiser grabs the chinlock. Gable fights up and grabs the ankle lock before handing it off to Otis to clean house. The Caterpillar is broken up by Vinci but Otis plants him down and Caterpillars Kaiser anyway. Vinci breaks up a super fall away slam though and Kaiser kicks Otis in the face for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C+. Imperium gets back on track after some rough weeks and it would be nice to see them built up for a title shot once Judgment Day loses the titles. For now though, beating Alpha Academy is a good way to go, though they need to beat some bigger teams as well. I’m not sure how many options they have though.

We look at Becky Lynch retaining the NXT Women’s Title at No Mercy. Lynch has suffered an elbow injury and she needed eleven stitches to close it. As a result, she is not medically cleared to compete tonight.

Tegan Nox is disappointed that her match with Lynch is off, but Chelsea Green comes in to say Nox should be happy that she isn’t going to lose. A match seems to be made for later.

Bronson Reed vs. Cedric Alexander

Alexander jumps him to start and manages a knock out to the floor. Back in and Reed knocks him out of the air, only to get caught with the Neuralizer for two. Reed is back with a crossbody into a backsplash. The Tsunami finishes Alexander at 2:14.

Drew McIntyre doesn’t want to hear about the right thing because he doesn’t remember anyone doing “the right thing” when the Bloodline was beating him down.

Here are Tommaso Ciampa and Gunther for a contract signing for their Intercontinental Title match next week. Ciampa is about to sign but stops to talk about how Gunther has been served five star meals since he got here. On the other hand, Ciampa is the kind of guy who is expected to turn roadkill into fillet and then makes it happen. Next week Ciampa gets to fight for something he has wanted since he was five years old and he will have his family in the front row. Ciampa is fighting for himself and signs the contract.

Gunther, wearing a suit, criticizes Ciampa for wearing less than professional clothes and says the title is the most prestigious in all of wrestling. Ciampa is ready to beat him tonight, so Gunther says Ciampa should prove it. Gunther signs and the match is on for tonight. A slap to Ciampa is enough to make him jump the table, which Gunther throws over the top. Ciampa chucks a chair at Gunther’s face and Gunther bails. Heck of a promo here from Ciampa, and he can back it up in the ring as well.

Damian Priest is yelling at the rest of Judgment Day but Rhea Ripley calms him down and JD McDonagh says focus on the Tag Team Titles and dividing their opponents. Priest says that’s not bad but needs to think about it.

Xavier Woods vs. Ivar

Kofi Kingston is on commentary and Valhalla is here with Ivar. Woods goes after him to start but Ivar gets a drive into the corner. Ivar crushes him and takes it to the floor, where Ivar misses a charge. A dropkick off of the barricade hits Ivar and we take a break. Back with Woods getting planted again but avoiding a top rope splash. A small package finishes Ivar at 7:35.

Rating: C+. I know they’re going for Ivar as a monster, but it might be better if he wasn’t losing every singles match he has. Pushing Ivar as a singles star is an interesting idea, but that doesn’t work so well without winning something. Woods winning here only makes so much sense anyway, as Ivar already lost to Kofi a few weeks back. Not a bad match, but kind of a puzzling decision.

Post match Ivar jumps Woods and takes out Kofi for trying to make the save. Ivar stacks them up and hits a moonsault for a double crushing. As always: this might be a bit more impressive if he hadn’t just lost.

Video on Seth Rollins vs. Shinsuke Nakamura.

Here is Rollins for a chat. He’s rather fired up (as usual) and even praises Michael Cole for conducting the interview. Cole talks about calling most of Rollins’ career but thinks that Shinsuke Nakamura is playing Rollins this time. He asks what Rollins is doing, because Rollins might not understand what he’s getting himself into. Cole brings up Rollins’ bad back and how many weapons Nakamura will have at his disposal.

Rollins asks how many years Cole has been behind that desk (26) and how many shows he has missed (2). After some applause for those numbers, Rollins says Cole is addicted to this. That’s what he’s going through as well, because this ring is how he makes a living, how he met his wife and why he has a beautiful baby girl. That’s the best he has because it’s a feeling instead of words.

Shinsuke Nakamura pops up on screen to accuse Rollins of faking his back injury. As Nakamura keeps talking, the real Nakamura comes in to jump Rollins from behind. Kinshasa connects as the taped Nakamura counts…..until Rollins gets up. Nakamura puts him through a chair and hits another Kinshasa before counting his own ten. In other words, the same way every segment before a Last Man Standing match ends.

Becky Lynch’s arm is in a sling but she tells Tegan Nox she’s ready for a fight later on. Natalya comes in to say Nox will get her chance.

Chelsea Green vs. Tegan Nox

Piper Niven is here with Green, who jumps Nox to start and goes for a tag. With that not working, Nox fights back but Niven offers a distraction. Cue Natalya, allowing Nox to knock Green off the ropes. The Shiniest Wizard finishes for Nox at 1:59.

Jey Uso is good with teaming with Cody Rhodes. He darts away.

Here is Drew McIntyre for a chat. Drew: “San Jose….what should we talk about?” He’s tired of getting involved in other people’s fights so he’s done with that. Cue Miz to suggest he was right, but McIntyre tells him to shut up again. Miz thinks McIntyre is taking a stand, so why not embrace who he really is? McIntyre: “Shut up Miz.”

McIntyre isn’t going to be the bad guy and suggests a match right now. Miz says that isn’t going to happen because they aren’t dressed for it. They don’t like each other, with Miz saying McIntyre isn’t worth his time. McIntyre says time’s up and it’s time to fight, so the kilt goes off and he’s ready to go. Miz goes for a cheap shot but gets drives into the corner as referees come in to break it up.

Miz vs. Drew McIntyre

Miz is in a suit and bails to the floor to start. Back in and Miz scores with a quick shot, allowing him to rip at McIntyre’s face. The running corner clothesline connects but Miz takes too long unhooking a buckle. The Glasgow Kiss looks to set up the Claymore….but McIntyre grabs the sword instead. McIntyre rips off a buckle pad, sends Miz into it, and hits the Future Shock for the pin at 3:49.

Rating: C. This was more of an illustration of the new McIntyre than anything else and that made for an interesting situation. McIntyre seems to be on his way to a big heel turn and that might be a very good thing for him, as he has felt a bit stale for awhile now. He certainly has the skill to make it work, though it appears to be a bit of a slow process.

Post match McIntyre says he’s a different man than he was 30 seconds ago. McIntyre: “Now I’m on my way to being forgiven! YEAH!” Then he leaves, high fiving fans along the way.

We look at Trick Williams becoming North American Champion.

Trick Williams introduces himself but Judgment Day interrupts, promising that Dominik Mysterio gets the title back tomorrow night.

Here is Cody Rhodes for a chat. He is ok with teaming with Jey Uso, because the Judgment Day got themselves into this trouble. The team’s plan is to be at Smackdown this week, so Cody will be there too, along with Jey. Then they’re on to Fastlane to win the titles.

Fastlane rundown, still with only five matches.

Chad Gable gets very intense when swearing revenge for the Alpha Academy’s setbacks.

Intercontinental Title: Tommaso Ciampa vs. Gunther

Ciampa is challenging and goes right after him to start. Some clotheslines against the ropes look to set up a jumping knee but Gunther reverses into a Boston crab. Ciampa makes the ropes and gets to the floor where he hits a Thesz press. Back in and Ciampa grabs some kind of a choke and it’s Gunther bailing to the floor this time as we take a break.

We come back with Ciampa being sent into the corner, followed by the sleeper. Gunther breaks the grip as the fans are doing Bray Wyatt’s fireflies deal for some reason. Gunther scores with a big boot for two and the sleeper goes on again. Ciampa fights up again, only to get sent hard into the corner as we take another break.

Back with Gunther taking it to the floor but chopping the announcers’ table by mistake. That’s enough for Ciampa to hit Willow’s Bell for two but the Fairy Tale Ending is blocked. Instead, Ciampa stomps away but the running knee is cut off by Gunther’s big dropkick for two. Ciampa hits the running knee, only to have Gunther come back with the sleeper suplex for two.

The big clothesline is cut off with a shot to the bad hand and the Sicilian Stretch goes on. Gunther can’t stack him up for a cover so Ciampa cranks away again until a boot gets the rope break. They chop it out but Gunther’s hand is done and he falls back into the corner. Gunther manages a gutwrench powerbomb though and the regular version plants Ciampa again. The sleeper goes on and Ciampa is out at 22:49.

Rating: B. I know Gunther gets praise for his power and overall demeanor, but he is a heck of a seller too. He looks like he is being tortured in there and that makes his ability to survive all the more impressive. When he hits that other level, it’s a special moment and the kind of thing that makes him feel like that much bigger of a star. Heck of a performance from both here, with Ciampa throwing everything he had at Gunther but coming up short, like so many others have.

Post match Imperium comes in to beat down Ciampa as Gunther leaves. Cue Johnny Gargano for the save and Ciampa is very happy. They load up Meet In The Middle…and the show ends before it happens.

Overall Rating: B-. The wrestling was mostly just ok though until the main event bailed it off. At the same time, they st up something for Fastlane and nothing on here was anything resembling bad. Three hours is still a very long show, but when it’s moving at this pace and has Rhea Ripley looking like the biggest star around, it’s a pretty good night.

Results
Imperium b. Alpha Academy – Kick to the face to Otis
Bronson Reed b. Cedric Alexander – Tsunami
Xavier Woods b. Ivar – Small package
Tegan Nox b. Chelsea Green – Shiniest Wizard
Drew McIntyre b. The Miz – Future Shock
Gunther b. Tommaso Ciampa – Sleeper

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 25, 2023
Location: Toyota Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

Things are getting interesting around here again as we are almost up to Fastlane, and this week might actually see something added to the card. Seth Rollins vs. Shinsuke Nakamura should be announced this week, though I think I’ve been saying that for the better part of a month now. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Cody Rhodes to get things going. After a clip of last week, with Cody saving Jey Uso from the Judgment Day as Drew McIntyre stood and watched, Cody talks about how someone is going to have to go to Smackdown in return for Uso. It also means a disgruntled locker room who wanted to watch Uso sink. He and Uso are not best friends but something tells him “we’re not in the third inning anymore boys” (a reference to Paul Heyman saying the Bloodline story was only in the third inning a few weeks back).

Rhodes say Uso make the right decision by turning down the Judgment Day, but cue Judgment Day (again minus Rhea Ripley) to interrupt. Dominik is booed out of the building, so Rhodes points out that no one likes him. Rhodes mentions Ripley so the fight is teased, only to have Uso run in to even things up a bit.

Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens come in as well and the Judgment Day backs off. Cue JD McDonagh with some chairs so everyone but Priest go inside. Priest realizes this is a bad idea and everyone but Priest gets beaten down. Priest goes in as well and gets beaten down four on one, with Rhodes getting in a loud chair shot to the back to send him running.

Otis vs. Bronson Reed

Maxxine Dupri is here with Otis. They fight over a lockup to start with neither going anywhere. An exchange of clotheslines goes nowhere but another double clothesline sends them both to the floor. Otis hits a running clothesline of his own for a knockdown but Reed hits his own clothesline for his own knockdown. Back in and a Samoan drop hits Otis, setting up the neck crank to slow things down a bit. Otis fights up and they both hit crossbodies to leave them both down. Something close to an Angle Slam drops Reed but Otis misses the Vader Bomb. A backsplash sets up the Tsunami to finish Otis at 4:22.

Rating: C+. This was a match where they didn’t hide what they were going for and there is nothing wrong with that. Commentary described this as big meaty men slapping meat and that Big E. would be happy. It worked well in that regard and Reed wins, as he should be doing on his way (hopefully) back up the ladder.

Becky Lynch is shining her title when Tegan Nox comes in. Lynch wanted Nox to answer last week’s open challenge but Nox says she deferred to the veteran Natalya. Lynch says you need to step on some toes so she’ll see Nox in the ring one day.

Post break Nox comes up to Adam Pearce and asks for the winner of the NXT Women’s Title match. Shouldn’t she be asking Shawn Michaels? Anyway Natalya comes in and says you have to earn title shots, so Pearce makes the #1 contenders match.

Ludwig Kaiser vs. Tommaso Ciampa

Giovanni Vinci is here with Kaiser and this is the result of a backstage argument between Kaiser and Ciampa. Kaiser grabs a headlock to start but Ciampa is back up with some right hands. That doesn’t last long as Kaiser sends him outside and we take a break. Back with Ciampa being sent into the corner but managing a backdrop to the floor.

Ciampa sends him into the steps and grabs the Willow’s Bell for two. The Fairy Tale Ending is broken up so Ciampa settles for a reverse DDT. Vinci offers a distraction though and Kaiser drops Ciampa, only for the referee to be distracted. Ciampa scores with a jumping knee for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: B-. WWE needs to build up new challengers for Gunther and Ciampa is one of the best choices they have at the moment. With Gunther now holding the record, there is more of a reason to believe that the title could change hands and that opens some doors. Beating the minions to get to the big guy is a good way to go and it’s what they’re doing here.

Post match Ciampa says he wants Gunther, who isn’t happy in the back.

Video on Dragon Lee.

Tegan Nox vs. Natalya

Becky Lynch is on commentary and the winner gets the winner of the NXT Women’s Title match at No Mercy. Nox elbows her in the ace to start and hits a sitout gordbuster, followed by the reverse Cannonball in the corner for two. Natalya grabs a suplex but it’s too early for the Sharpshooter. Instead Nox hits the Shiniest Wizard for the pin at 2:36. That’s a good way to bring Nox back.

Damian Priest storms into the Judgment Day’s locker room, where he finds JD McDonagh. Yelling ensues, with Priest saying McDonagh will never be one of them and blaming him for the beating earlier. McDonagh is promptly thrown out.

Here is Seth Rollins for a chat. Rollins says the fans are tired of Shinsuke Nakamura attacking him and asks them to sing his song if they agree. Rollins says he’s challenged Nakamura to fight him in a rematch so if Nakamura isn’t out here right now, he’s moving on. Nakamura pops up on screen to say (in Japanese) that Rollins’ body is failing him, but he wants one last change. At Fastlane. In a Last Man Standing match.

Rollins looks a big unsure but recaps what Nakamura just said. His broken back is a strength and his family will only be ashamed of him if he doesn’t give it everything he has. His family knows he loves them but they know he loves this. Rollins’ 100% makes him the best in the world, so they can get crazy at Fastlane, Last Man Standing.

Ricochet, on crutches after last week’s attack, isn’t done with Shinsuke Nakamura and wants him no matter what happens at Fastlane.

We look at the Judgment Day defeating Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn at Payback to win the Tag Team Titles.

NXT North American Title: Dominik Mysterio vs. Dragon Lee

Dominik, on his own, is defending. They start fast with Lee sending him to the floor and hitting a big running flip dive. Back in and Dominik rolls him into a half crab, with Lee going straight to the rope. A DDT on the apron drops Lee again and we take a break. We come back with Dominik’s frog splash hitting raised knees. Some running dropkicks in the corner have Dominik in trouble as Cole goes over the top in his praise of Lee.

Back up and they trade knees to the face until Dominik gets two off a Michinoku Driver. The 619 misses so Lee hits another knee for two. Lee hits a snappy running hurricanrana off the apron, followed by a sitout powerbomb for two back inside. Dominik manages to counter a running DDT by crotching him on top, setting up the frog splash to retain the title at 10:06.

Rating: B. This was all about making Lee and NXT as a whole look good and they did both of those things rather well. Lee was flying all over the place and looked awesome more than once, though Dominik needed to win a match on his own just to show what he can do. That was even more important after last week’s loss to Cody Rhodes and this worked well on all levels.

We look at Nia Jax’s path of destruction.

Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn are ready to win their Tag Team Titles back. Note that Owens is wearing a Rey Mysterio/Eddie Guerrero shirt. If that’s a very subtle hint at a team having success and then splitting (which it very well may not be), WWE has upgraded their foreshadowing game.

Here is Nia Jax for a chat. She introduces herself as the baddest human in all of WWE. Everyone thought Rhea Ripley would be the big star but Nia squashed her. Shayna Baszler, Zoey Stark, Raquel Rodriguez, Chelsea Green and Piper Niven got squashed too. Anyone else would get that treatment, so cue Stark to go after Jax. Referees break it up rather quickly.

Zoey Stark vs. Nia Jax

Jax runs her over with an elbow to start and hits the running splash in the corner. Stark avoid a charge though and Jax goes shoulder first into the post. Some kicks to the head rock Jax and a springboard missile dropkick knocks Jax into the ropes. Stark tries a fireman’s carry but Jax falls hard onto her instead. A legdrop sends Stark throat first onto the bottom rope and the Annihilator finishes for Jax at 2:42.

Jey Uso didn’t join the Judgment Day because he didn’t want anything to do with any groups. He’ll be watching the Tag Team Title match tonight and will be there if Judgment Day is up to their normal stuff.

Finn Balor congratulates Dominik Mysterio on his win but says Damian Priest isn’t in the best place. Dominik will have their backs in the main event.

Here is Miz for MizTV, with special guest Drew McIntyre. Miz says he would have left Jey Uso to get beaten up last week but McIntyre says they’re nothing alike. That sends Miz into a speech about how they’ve both been the backbone of the company, with McIntyre being the WWE Champion. Then he lost, but had another chance at Clash At The Castle. The Bloodline cost him the title, with Uso being the one to lead a lot of the beatdowns. Then the Judgment Day beat up Uso and…..McIntyre: “Karma’s a b****.” Miz calls McIntyre the Batman of WWE, with Cody Rhodes being the Superman.

Cue New Day (including McIntyre’s scheduled opponent for tonight, Kofi Kingston) to interrupt and they don’t know this McIntyre. The one they know isn’t a coward because the one they know is Big D. But now there seems to have been a bit of shrinkage, as that big sword might not be enough to do the job. Miz gets cut off, with McIntyre saying he was expected to save the day as always.

Rhodes didn’t make a save out of the goodness of his heart, but rather because it was his mess. Kofi says McIntyre should have saved Uso, but McIntyre brings up all of the beatings the Bloodline, including Uso, gave Xavier Woods. Miz gets cut off (McIntyre says “Shut up Miz!” for the third time), leaving Kofi to talk about how McIntyre will always do what’s right. After the fourth SHUT UP MIZ (which the fans chant), McIntyre finally headbutts him down and we’re ready to fight.

Chad Gable gives Otis a pep talk after the loss when Ludwig Kaiser interrupts. They don’t want Kaiser there so Gable sends him off to get brow beaten by Gunther again. And remember: Gable is still coming for Gunther’s Intercontinental Title.

Drew McIntyre vs. Kofi Kingston

Xavier Woods is at ringside and Cole says this was made official during the break, despite Miz saying he wanted McIntyre to beat Kingston up tonight before New Day came out. McIntyre wastes no time in running Kofi over but Kofi is back with the double leapfrogs. The second is pulled out of the air but Kofi is fine enough to hit a running dropkick to the floor. The big dive to the floor takes McIntyre down again and there’s a high crossbody to do it one more time.

We take a break and come back with McIntyre sending him flying off an overhead belly to belly. Kingston manages a quick Fameasser for two and the Boom Drop connects as well. McIntyre grabs the Futureshock but Kingston sidesteps a charge to send him outside. The suicide dive connects but McIntyre gives him a nasty looking Alabama Slam onto the apron. The Claymore misses though and Kingston grabs the SOS for two. Cue Ivar, with Valhalla, to take Woods out, including a running crossbody against the barricade. McIntyre hits the Claymore on the distracted Kingston for the pin at 12:32.

Rating: B-. So that’s more or less the confirmation of McIntyre’s heel turn and it’s pretty overdue at this point. McIntyre has been needing to do something different for a long time now and letting him go evil again isn’t the worst idea in the world. He might not be all the way there yet, but it’s an idea that could have some legs.

Post match Ivar unloads on Kingston as McIntyre looks back, shrugs, and walks away. Ivar hits the moonsault to leave Kingston laying.

Gunther yells at Giovanni Vinci until Ludwig Kaiser interrupts to tell him what Chad Gable said. Gunther isn’t happy with either of them and says Vinci is Kaiser’s responsibility. If either of them screw up, they have a problem. Now Gunther is going to deal with Tommaso Ciampa himself.

Ivar says he took out Xavier Woods because New Day took out Erick. Eye for an eye.

Tag Team Titles: Judgment Day vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

Judgment Day (Damian Priest/Finn Balor) are defending. It’s a brawl at the bell until Sami snaps off some armdrags to Balor. We take an early break and come back with Sami being taken into champs’ corner so Balor can send him into the buckle. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Sami fights over to the corner for the tag off to Owens. Instead of going after Balor though, Owens goes after the illegal Priest and gets knocked down by Balor.

Priest comes in for the kicks to the chest but Owens comes back with the hockey fight punches. A DDT plants Priest and it’s Sami coming back for some right hands in the corner. The champs are knocked to the floor and there’s a big dive to the floor. We take another break and come back with Sami running the ropes for the tornado DDT on Priest. Owens comes back in to unload on Balor, including the Cannonball. With Priest knocked outside, Owens hits the frog splash for two on Balor as the fans declare this AWESOME.

Balor catches Owens on top but it’s a super Regal Roll to give Owens two more. The Swanton hits Balor’s raised knees and it’s the Sling Blade into the Coup de Grace with Sami having to make the save. South of Heaven is broken up and the hot tag brings in Sami but Dominik Mysterio runs in to break up the Coup de Grace.

Instead it’s a Blue Thunder Bomb for two on Priest as Balor and Owens fight to the floor. Cue Jey Uso to take out Dominik but JD McDonagh runs in to go after Uso. Cody Rhodes runs in as well and the brawl is on in the aisle. A Stunner hits Balor but McDonagh belts Sami in the face so Priest can get the pin to retain the titles at 20:13.

Rating: B. They were getting somewhere in the end with all of the run-ins and craziness and that made you think that something nutty might happen. At the same time, they had McDonagh come in and to redeem himself from earlier and that is a good way to go. There is a strong chance that this is going to set up WarGames in November and that is about as smart of an option as there is for that match at the moment.

Judgment Day celebrates but Rhodes, Uso, Owens and Zayn jump them for the big brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This show covered a lot of ground, set things up for the future and had some strong action throughout at the same time. That’s a rather nice way to go for three hours and even though Fastlane has a lot more that needs to be done in the next week and a half, at least they have a big Raw match set up. I liked this show a good bit and I want to see where some of these stories are going, so we’ll call this a strong success.

Results
Bronson Reed b. Otis – Tsunami
Tommaso Ciampa b. Ludwig Kaiser – Jumping knee
Tegan Nox b. Natalya – Shiniest Wizard
Dominik Mysterio b. Dragon Lee – Frog splash
Nia Jax b. Zoey Stark – Annihilator
Drew McIntyre b. Kofi Kingston – Claymore
Judgment Day b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – Belt shot to Zayn

 

 

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Clash of Champions 2016
Date: September 25, 2016
Location: Bankers Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 13,467
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

For some reason, this was requested back in the day so we might as well check it off the list. This is the first Raw exclusive pay per view after the Brand Split so the roster is a little limited. In this case, the main event is Kevin Owens defending the Universal Title against Seth Rollins. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Nia Jax vs. Alicia Fox

Jax showed up a few weeks ago and Fox didn’t like it, leading to Fox freaking out. Then Jax beat her up in a match so we’ll do it again. Fox dropkicks her at the bell to start fast and fires off kicks. That earns her some rams into the corner as Jax isn’t having any of that. We’re already in the chinlock for a bit before Jax sends her flying again. Fox slugs away in the corner though and hits a high crossbody. The ax kick gets two but Jax runs Fox over without much effort. The Samoan drop crushes Fox for the pin at 4:54.

Rating: C. This was about what you would expect here, as Jax shrugged off anything Fox threw at her and won pretty decisively. The match wasn’t anything special, with Jax getting a big push as she is new on Raw. Fox is someone who could be destroyed without sacrificing much and keeping it simple and to the point was the right way to go here.

The opening video looks at what it takes to be a champion and how we got to the major matches.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Good Brothers

New Day, meaning Kofi Kingston and Big E. in this case, is defending. Before the match, Kofi talks about how a win here would make them champions for 400 days, but the Good Brothers want to break them up like Brangelina. Anderson and Gallows have never even had a big old bowl of Booty-O’s!

The Brothers finally come out and it’s a clothesline to Big E. on the floor, plus cheap shot to Woods. A Liger Bomb to Kofi for two and the champs are in early trouble. Gallows comes in for a kick to the head and hammers away in the corner. Big E. gets back up but Gallows knocks Kofi right back into the wrong corner. Kofi gets in a shot of his own though and the tag to Anderson takes too long, allowing Big E. to come in for the rapid fire suplexes. The Warrior Splash hits Anderson but he’s able to cut off the spear through the ropes.

Gallows comes in off a blind tag and boots Big E. in the face, setting up the big boot/flapjack combination for two. The tag brings Kofi back in and he is quickly spinebustered for two more. Big E. is dropped again but Kofi breaks up the Magic Killer. Kofi manages Trouble In Paradise and Big E. is back in for the Big Ending but Gallows breaks it up. The referee yells at Gallows, meaning Woods can get in a Francesca shot to Anderson. The Midnight Hour retains the titles at 6:45.

Rating: B-. They crammed a lot into a rather short match here but New Day is always a good choice to open the show. You are going to get the high energy match that the fans will react to and that is a smart way to bring up the energy. The Brothers were viable challengers here and had New Day in a lot of trouble more than once before coming up short. It felt like a hot house show opener and this worked well in pretty much every aspect needed.

We recap TJ Perkins winning the Cruiserweight Classic to become the new Cruiserweight Champion.

TJ Perkins has been working to get here since 1998 and his confidence is going to get him beyond Brian Kendrick.

Cruiserweight Title: Brian Kendrick vs. TJ Perkins

Perkins is defending and I do miss his video game entrance (and Kendrick’s I’m A Man With A Plan song). Not so much the purpose ropes, which was about all the identity the cruiserweight division had. They go with the grappling to start until TJP gets a headscissors. Kendrick switches that into a headlock but gets reversed into a kneebar, sending him straight to the ropes.

The fans are split as Kendrick ties him in the ring skirt and hammers away as commentary tries to get this division and its wrestlers over as much as possible. TJP is right back with a Muta Lock, sending Kendrick to the ropes again. Kendrick manages to send him outside to bang up TJP’s neck but his own knee is hurt as well. Back in and Kendrick gets in a cross arm choke before missing a charge and crashing out to the floor. TJP fights out of another crank and hits a dropkick into a heel kick.

A jumping neckbreaker doesn’t quite work for TJP but a double chickenwing backbreaker two two. With nothing else working, TJP snaps off a top rope hurricanrana to the floor for a double crash. Back in and Kendrick can’t hit the Sliced Bread so TJP goes up, only to miss the 450. Kendrick can’t get the Captain’s Hook but TJP can’t get the kneebar either. Now Sliced Bread gives Kendrick two but this time the Captain’s Hook is reversed into the Detonation Kick. The kneebar retains the title at 10:33.

Rating: B-. This was turning into a heck of a match but there was no way around the fact that it means absolutely nothing. The Cruiserweight Title was introduced in the Cruiserweight Classic and that worked well enough, but after that it became clear why it was gone again. No matter how good the matches might be, and this was a rather good one, you can only get so far with the purple ropes and a title for smaller wrestlers when Daniel Bryan was the hottest thing in the world just a few years ago.

Post match respect is teased but Kendrick drops him and walks off.

Cesaro, in his white tuxedo, is ready to finish the comeback and beat Sheamus to win their best of seven series. This series is about mental toughness and he is ready to show the Cesaro Section the biggest comeback in history.

We recap the first six matches, with Sheamus going up 3-0 but Cesaro has made a comeback to bring us to a winner take all match. The matches have been good, but egads it was hard to sit through this many matches between anyone.

Cesaro vs. Sheamus

The winner gets an unspecified title shot. Cesaro wastes no time in hitting a dropkick but Sheamus is right back with the forearms to the chest. Those are broken up and Sheamus is knocked to the floor, allowing Cesaro to hit the running seated senton off the apron. Back in and Sheamus knocks him off the top for a crash though, setting up a middle rope knee. Some backbreakers stay on Cesaro’s back and we hit the chinlock.

Back up and Sheamus hits a running spinwheel kick in the corner (that looked good) and a top rope clothesline gets two. Sheamus misses a charge into the post though and Cesaro scores with an uppercut to the back. A tornado DDT gets two on Sheamus and the Swiss One Nine (if that’s not the name, it should be) sets up a high crossbody for two more. The Neutralizer is blocked so Cesaro hits a heck of a springboard corkscrew uppercut for another near fall.

It’s too early for the Swing though and Sheamus gets two more off another backbreaker. Two Irish Curses combine for two (so hit a third one then) but the Cloverleaf is countered into a small package to give Cesaro two of his own. Sheamus gets creative with a Razor’s Edge dropped into a backbreaker (OUCH) but the Brogue Kick is countered into the Swing. Cesaro gets the Sharpshooter (while holding his back), sending Sheamus over to the rope.

The apron superplex is countered so Cesaro kicks him in the face instead, setting up one of those suicide dives which lands so badly that the referee runs out to make sure Cesaro isn’t dead. Back in and a quick Brogue Kick gives Sheamus two (as we see the fourth replay of the dive, which looked TERRIFYING).

Cesaro grabs a Neutralizer for two of his own and they’re both down again. Some uppercuts in the corner have Sheamus in more trouble until he cuts off a charge with a raised boot. Sheamus pulls himself up to the top but gets dropkicked down but Sheamus headbutts him right back off the top. A top rope clothesline to the floor hits Cesaro in the back and Sheamus hits White Noise on the floor. Cesaro clotheslines him into the crowd though and it’s a no contest as they’re both out at 16:30.

Rating: B+. This is a great example of a match where time has been kind. I couldn’t stand this feud at the time and the reveal of them getting a Tag Team Title shot didn’t help (though the Bar wound up being great) but this was an awesome fight. They didn’t stop for almost any time during the match and I wanted to see what they were going to come up with next. Awesome stuff here and if they hadn’t done the match to death, I would have liked it a lot more back in the day.

Post match Cesaro wants to keep going but Sheamus staggers out of the arena.

Bayley, still in the Hugger phase, is interrupted by Charlotte, still in….the only phase she has, who says Bayley cheated to get her title shot tonight. Charlotte insists that Bayley isn’t going to win tonight, with Bayley reminding her of that time she pinned Charlotte a few weeks ago. Charlotte: “You can’t even beat Sasha.”

Sami Zayn vs. Chris Jericho

I do miss Sami’s jaunty hat. Believe it or not, this is over Kevin Owens, who Sami doesn’t like but is Jericho’s new best friend. Therefore, this is about Jericho protecting his own honor after Sami said he was Owens’ b****. Jericho yells at the fans to start until Sami drives him into the corner and hammers away. The referee breaks it up and Jericho gets in the cheap shot.

Sami isn’t having that and snaps off some armdrags into a leg lariat, meaning Jericho needs a breather. With Jericho on the floor, Sami follows him out and hits the moonsault off the barricade. Back in and the referee distracts Sami, allowing Jericho to hit the triangle dropkick to take over. A top rope elbow to the face gives Jericho two and he crotches Sami on top to cut off a quick comeback bid. Jericho loads up the bulldog but Sami sends him hard into the corner and sends him outside.

There’s the big no hands running flip dive (that always looks great), followed by a Michinoku Driver for two on Jericho back inside. Sami misses a flying something off the top and Jericho is back with a step up enziguri. Jericho starts kicking him in the head but Sami pulls him down into a rollup for two more. The rope walk tornado DDT sets up the Helluva Kick but Jericho bails to the floor just in time.

The diving tornado DDT takes Jericho down again outside, only to have another Helluva Kick miss back inside. Instead Sami suplexes him into the corner but a third Helluva Kick misses, allowing Jericho to grab the Walls. Sami finally reverses into a rollup for two and the Blue Thunder Bomb connects for the same. Then Jericho hits the Codebreaker for the pin at 15:21.

Rating: B. Were you expecting anything else from Jericho vs. Zayn in a fifteen minute pay per view match? Sami was fighting from underneath for most of the match, which is where he excels like few others. There is something about watching him try to survive against a bigger star and even get close to winning multiple times, only to come up short. Awesome match here, as this show has been pretty great so far.

Bosses Mick Foley and Stephanie McMahon come up to Raw World Champion Kevin Owens, saying if anyone can live up to the rest of the show, it’s him. Owens isn’t impressed ad is ready to show them why they should have taken him over Seth Rollins with the #1 Draft pick. Rollins is no longer then man, but rather the mistake. Their mistake.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match with Charlotte defending against Bayley and Sasha Banks. Charlotte beat Banks to win the title at Summerslam when Banks had a bad back. Then Bayley showed up and beat Charlotte in a non-title match, setting up the title match.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Charlotte, with Dana Brooke (that didn’t go very far) is defending. Banks chases Charlotte straight to the floor and starts the fight so Bayley kicks both of them in the face. Back in and Bayley rolls Charlotte up for some near falls but Banks isn’t having that. Instead Bayley rolls her up for two but Charlotte pulls Banks down by the hair. We get the big three way standoff until Banks drops Bayley.

Charlotte grabs a neckbreaker to put Banks down but gets crotched on top. Bayley is back up and kicks Charlotte to the floor, setting up a twisting Stunner over the middle rope to take banks down. Brooke gets in a cheap shot on Bayley though, allowing Charlotte to knee Banks into the corner. There’s a hard whip into the corner and Banks’ back is getting a lot more messed up.

Charlotte stops to deck Bayley again but Banks sends Charlotte into the corner to even things up a bit. The Bank Statement is broken up but Bayley is back in with a double high crossbody. Bayley misses a running knee in the corner though and Banks stacks both of them up, setting up the double knees. Back up and Banks breaks up the Figure Eight and Bayley hits the Bayley To Belly for two on Charlotte, leaving everyone down again.

With nothing else working, Banks and Bayley beat up Charlotte…who of course shrugs it off and sends Bayley into the corner again. If that’s not enough, Charlotte drops Banks off the middle rope before doing the same to Bayley. Charlotte hits the moonsault onto both of them for two on Banks, who is right back up with the Bank Statement.

Brooke makes a save of her own and Bayley is shoved off the top for a crash. The Bank Statement has Charlotte in more trouble but Bayley breaks it up this time. Banks does the same thing with Charlotte and Bayley switching places, allowing Charlotte to send Banks hard into the barricade. Back in and Charlotte boots Bayley into Banks, followed by another big boot to retain the title at 15:28.

Rating: B-. Sweet goodness Charlotte was every bit as dominant back then and it was still not the most appealing thing. She kept shrugging off everything Bayley and Banks threw at her, including both at once, and then won the title by beating them both up without much trouble. Good enough match, but it was a lot of Charlotte, as tends to be the case.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps/previews the show.

Remember Nia Jax crushing Alicia Fox on the Kickoff Show? Here are some highlights, in case you were wondering about a near squash.

We recap Roman Reigns challenging Rusev for the US Title. Reigns, being kind of a jerk, interrupted Rusev and Lana’s celebration and shoved her into a cake. They had been supposed to fight at Summerslam but got in a fight before the match so nothing happened.

United States Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Rusev is defending and Lana handles his introduction. They fight over a lockup to start until Reigns knocks him outside. Back in and Reigns wins a slugout until Rusev spinwheel kicks him in the face for two. Rusev hammers away and whips him into the corner a few times as the fans are way behind Reigns. The clothesline comeback doesn’t last long as Rusev knocks him outside for some rams into the barricade.

Rusev is sent into the steps for two and we hit the chinlock. That stays on for a good bit before Rusev hits a running headbutt and stops for some Bulgarian style glaring. A dropkick of all things drops Reigns again but he rolls away from a top rope headbutt (he learned from the first headbutt you see). The corner clotheslines rock Rusev, who crashes out to the floor and gets sent into the steps for a bonus.

Back in and the Superman Punch is kicked out of the air, setting up a hot shot for two. Reigns cuts off the Machka Kick and hits the Superman Punch for two of his own. Back up and the Lana distraction lets the Machka Kick connect and Rusev loses it on the referee for a bit. The Accolade (camel clutch) is broken up though and Reigns hits the spear, only to have Lana pull the referee.

That’s good for an ejection and Reigns sends Rusev outside as well. The running dropkick hits Rusev but it’s the Machka Kick to give him two back inside. Now the Accolade goes on but Reigns powers up and hits the spear for the pin and the title at 17:10 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: B-. This was the Reigns that does not have the best reputation, as while the wrestling was good enough, it wasn’t exactly exciting stuff and he kept shrugging off everything thrown at him. That doesn’t make for the most interesting matches and the ending came out of absolutely nowhere. Not a bad match at all, but there was no point where I was getting interested or excited.

Seth Rollins runs into Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley but he really doesn’t want to hear anything from Stephanie. They bet on the wrong guy, and tell HHH that he bet against the wrong guy.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Finn Balor won the Universal Title at Summerslam but got hurt, meaning the title was decided in a fatal four way. HHH interfered and cost Seth Rollins the title, siding with Kevin Owens instead in quite the screwjob. Now Rollins wants revenge, as HHH (and Stephanie) bet on the wrong guy (as you might have heard all of a few seconds ago). In other words, it was a bunch of Stephanie getting to be all fierce with people while Owens was just kind of there quite a bit of the while.

Raw World Title: Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is defending and they fight to the floor to start with Rollins getting the better of things. Back in and Rollins stomps away in the corner, setting up the running knee to the face for two. Stomping and chopping in the corner have Owens in more trouble and the middle rope Blockbuster gets two. The Pedigree is blocked though and Owens snaps off a DDT for two of his own.

Rollins is sent outside and comes up favoring his knee, allowing Owens to stomp away back inside (the fans approve). Owens kicks away at the knee and backdrops a charging Rollins out to the floor. An elbow off the apron crushes Rollins again and the backsplash makes it worse. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Owens whips him hard into the corner to keep Rollins down. Back up and Rollins starts the comeback, including the Downward Spiral into the middle buckle.

A running dropkick sends Owens outside and Rollins uses the chance to set up the announcers’ table. Ever the smart champion, Owens bails back inside before anything can happen, only to get superkicked for two. Rollins misses a charge into the corner though and Owens kicks him in the knee again. The Cannonball gets two but Rollins is back up for an exchange of strikes to leave them both down.

Rollins’ springboard knee is cut off so Owens can hit the pumphandle brainbuster onto the knee for two more. A super gutbuster into the frog splash gives Owens another near fall and they head back to the floor. Owens misses the splash through the announcers’ table and it’s another double down. Back in and Rollins hits a frog splash for two so cue Chris Jericho.

The distraction lets Owens hit the package side slam but Rollins is back with a Pedigree for the same, thanks to Jericho putting the foot on the rope. The referee gets bumped (of course) so there’s no count for Rollins’ Pedigree. Jericho comes in but gets backdropped to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. Stephanie McMahon pops up to send in another referee….so Owens can hit the pop up powerbomb to retain at 25:07.

Rating: B-. This was REALLY long and could have easily had ten minutes shaved off. It was one of those matches where it felt like they were just trying to fill in time rather than winning the match most of the time. On top of that, it also felt like it was a HHH style match of “ok, let’s get everything done before we get to the shenanigans”. That’s not a great feeling, and it never came off like Rollins was going to win the title to make it even worse. Good action, but bad setup and execution.

Overall Rating: B. There’s a lot of good stuff on here, but it does run a bit longer than it needs to. It also doesn’t help that while the match quality is high, the show could not feel more second tier if it tried. Reigns winning the title was a moment that felt flat and other than that, there was nothing on here that came off like a game changing moment. It’s definitely a pick and choose show where some of the matches are worth a look, but you might not want to sit through the whole thing.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 82,265
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

We’re back to this show after a year away and I’m not sure what to think about this one. I wasn’t in the stadium for this one and for once that is making me remember the show a little bit better. This whole thing is centered around a few matches, as Wrestlemania always tends to be. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Tony Nese

Murphy is defending and this is during Nese’s (who won a tournament to get here) not so great face run. First good thing: there are a bunch of people in their seats already so the place doesn’t look ridiculous. Murphy misses a running knee at the bell so Nese hammers away in the corner and tells the fans that this is his Wrestlemania moment. A cartwheel off the apron lets Nese hit him in the jaw but Murphy grabs a fireman’s carry drop onto the corner (Colt Cabana’s Chicago Skyline) as we take a break.

Back with Murphy holding a chinlock but getting suplexed into the corner to cut things off. Some running elbows to the face rock Murphy and the Lionsault, with Murphy hanging in the ropes, gets two. Nese catches him on the ropes with a palm strike, only to get pulled into a Cheeky Nandos kick. A powerbomb into a spinning faceplant gives Murphy two as we get the “still filing in line” from commentary. Murphy’s Law is countered and Nese hits a reverse hurricanrana to put them both down again.

Murphy wins a strike off but Nese is right back with a sunset driver for his own near fall as the fans are finally getting into this. The running Nese doesn’t get to launch so Nese hits the Fosbury Flop instead. Back in and the 450 gets two in a surprising near fall. The jumping knee connects out of nowhere and Murphy’s Law gets two as Nese gets a foot on the rope. Ever the villain, Murphy tries his own running Nese, which is cut off by a superkick. The real running Nese finishes Murphy at 10:44.

Rating: C. The 205 Live guys had several matches that would blow this one away but at least they had a nice moment in the end with the fans getting into things. Nese as a face didn’t exactly click but beating Murphy felt like a bit deal. It’s a nice mini feel good moment to start what is going to be a long night.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Zelina Vega, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Liv Morgan, Sarah Logan, Ruby Riott, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Maria Kanellis, Asuka, Sonya Deville, Candice LeRae, Naomi, Nikki Cross, Lana, Dana Brooke, Mickie James

Only Naomi and Asuka get entrances. Nikki goes nuts to start and it’s a big brawl, as a battle royal should be. Maria is out in a hurry and Asuka knocks out Candice and Nikki back to back. Ember and Naomi trade hurricanranas until the former hits a quick springboard Eclipse on Lana. Another Eclipse gets rid of Naomi and there’s the real version to Mandy. Ember goes up again but Lana (the one in the designated Captain Marvel attire) shoves her out.

Sane hits an Alabama Slam on Lana and goes up like a schnook, only to get shoved to the apron by Logan. Even the bigger schnook, Logan doesn’t eliminate her but rather joins the rest of the Riott Squad to go after Lana. The elimination doesn’t take long but Sane drops Logan. The Insane Elbow connects, only t have the Squad get together and eliminate Sane without much trouble. An assisted flipping Stunner rocks Vega but AGAIN Logan doesn’t get the elimination.

Instead the Squad goes after Asuka and again they don’t eliminate her. Brooke gets to fight off all three of them and manages a slow motion Thesz press on Morgan. Riott goes after Brooke and gets tossed, with Morgan following her out. Brooke’s handspring elbow hits Vega’s knees though and the running knees in the corner make it worse. Rose and Deville get rid of Vega and Brooke, meaning we can get a big hug.

We’re down to Rose, Deville, Asuka, James, Logan and Carmella, the latter of whom seems to be on the floor because that’s something you have to have in battle royals these days. James hurricanranas Rose to the apron and superkicks her out, only to get dropped by Deville. Asuka beats up Logan and Deville at once but she manages to toss Deville. Logan gets rid of Asuka but, say it with me, Carmella is still in and superkicks Logan out for the win at 10:33.

Rating: D. Holy sweet goodness I can’t stand that finish and yet we seem to get it in every few battle royals (including last year’s women’s battle royal). I know Carmella getting the win is for the sake of the New York fans but egads this feels like a waste of a match, which tends to be the case with so many of these pre-show battle royals. In other words: more of the same stuff that wasn’t good in the first place.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Revival is defending and picked the match because they thought it would be an easy win. See, Hawkins hasn’t won a match in two and a half years so of course he gets a Wrestlemania title shot (you have to keep the New York crowd happy you see). Dawson shoves Hawkins down to start and then pats him on the cheek in the corner. We get a recap of the Edgeheads as Dawson headlocks Hawkins down.

Ryder comes in as we hear about how the show in “the shadow of New York”, which is acknowledged as New Jersey, likely for one of the only times tonight. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Wilder down but Dawson low bridges him out to the floor. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two and the armbar goes on. Dawson comes back in and rips at the face before working on his own armbar.

That’s enough of that so Wilder grabs another armbar (he’s up 2-1 on Dawson) to keep Ryder down. Ryder fights up again but neckbreakers his way out of a double suplex. With Hawkins being distracted, the champs cheat to set up a hard clothesline for two more. The assisted legdrop gives Wilder two and we hit the chinlock as this keeps going. Ryder finally suplexes his way to freedom and there’s the hot tag to Hawkins.

House is cleaned until it’s a double clothesline to put Hawkins and Dawson down at the same time. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson but Ryder and Wilder crash out to the floor. Wilder saves Dawson at two and tornado DDTs Ryder on the floor. A brainbuster drops Hawkins outside as well and they’re all down for a bit. Back in and Hawkins is dead but manages a small package for the pin and the titles at 13:20. Hawkins slowly realizing that not only is the match over but that they won is kind of awesome.

Rating: D+. This went on too long but the ending was fine after setting everything up for so long with the losing streak. Hawkins and Ryder are a likable team so it’s not like them winning the titles is a bad idea. Besides, WWE has already taken away anything that the Revival could offer (and yet it would still get worse) so the loss doesn’t do a ton of damage to them anyway.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Otis, Karl Anderson, Andrade, Gran Metalik, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Bo Dallas, Colin Jost Jeff Hardy, No Way Jose, Lince Dorado, Bobby Roode, Konnor, Tyler Breeze, Viktor, Luke Harper, Ali, Apollo Crews, Michael Che, Titus O’Neil, Tucker, Braun Strowman, Shelton Benjamin, Jinder Mahal, Matt Hardy, Curtis Axel, Rhyno, Luke Gallows, EC3, Kalisto

So the big deal here is Jost and Che are from Saturday Night Live and Strowman doesn’t like them. The two of them bail to the floor and hide under the ring as Axel is out in about ten seconds. Dorado takes a SCARY bump to the floor with Breeze, EC3 and Benjamin following him out. There goes Dallas as well but it’s time for a staredown with Strowman and Harper.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Titus gets rid of Slater. As expected, Titus is out a few seconds later off a missed charge and Ali gets rid of Jose. Ascension sends Strowman shoulder first into the post for a crash to the floor (through the ropes so no elimination). Anderson isn’t so lucky as he gets tossed and the Hardys do the same to Rhyno. Roode and Metalik are out next as the ring is starting to empty a bit.

Andrade tosses Kalisto onto Metalik but Gable rolls Andrade with German suplexes. Since it’s Gable though, Andrade throws him out in a hurry, leaving Otis to hit a double Caterpillar on the Ascension. They’re both out as well but Strowman is back in to get rid of Gallows, Tucker and Otis in a row. There goes Mahal as Harper tries to suplex Ali over the top. With Ali hanging upside down, Strowman kicks Harper out, nearly dropping Ali on his head in a very near miss.

We’re down to Strowman, Andrade, Matt, Jeff and Crews in the ring with Che and Jost still underneath the ring. Andrade and Crews go to the apron and Andrade tries a hurricanrana for no intelligent reason in a double elimination. Strowman puts the Hardys on the apron in the battle of North Carolina as Che and Jost get back inside. They can’t get rid of Strowman, who dumps the Hardys and is ready for the destruction.

Jost grabs a mic though and says this doesn’t need to end in violence. He presents his personal therapist, whose breathing exercises earn him a chokeslam. Che tries to eliminate himself but Strowman punches himself out instead. Strowman misses a charge and almost gets eliminated but powers through it and tosses Jost for the win at 10:27.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s stupid and the SNL guys added nothing to the whole thing but Strowman won in the end and there were some nice spots (granted they went with some scary ones) throughout. It isn’t anything better or worse than your usual “get them all in there” battle royal and it could have been worse. That’s high praise for something like this anymore.

And with that Smackdown length Kickoff Show out of the way, we can get on with the real show. Isn’t modern WWE great?

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful and we get the big helicopter flyover.

The opening video, complete with a WWE Presents, features the wrestlers talking about how Shakespeare said all the world’s a stage. Tonight, this is their stage and they are the players. We get the classic moments of course because this show is built around history. They do a good job of starting this slowly and then building it up into a big feeling. As usual, WWE’s promo videos are nothing short of incredible and somehow they manage to get better a lot of the time. That being said, wrestlers calling themselves storytellers doesn’t sound right.

Maybe it’s how many times I’ve heard the song on highlight packages since then, but that Love Runs Out theme song is really catchy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss, the host for the evening, to open things up. Bliss talks about how this show needs a goddess and if she snaps her fingers, she can make a Wrestlemania moment. A snap of her fingers produces Hulk Hogan, who is happy to be back here in the Silverdome. That gets a chuckle so then he calls it the MetLife Center in a joke that doesn’t go over as well. Hogan and Bliss pose together in a cute moment.

Hold on though as Paul Heyman storms out and says we’re doing the Universal Title match RIGHT NOW. The faster Lesnar wins, the faster he can go to Las Vegas where he is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending after winning the Royal Rumble and gets a big BEAST SLAYER intro. At least BURN IT DOWN gets a big reaction so they’re doing something right. Lesnar jumps him before the bell and knees Rollins off the apron. An F5 plants Rollins on the floor and a hard whip into the barricade makes it even worse. Rollins gets tossed over the announcers’ table as the beating is on in a big way. That’s not enough for Lesnar so he throws Rollins over another table before throwing Rollins inside.

Heyman and Lesnar talk the angry trash but it’s back to the floor before the opening bell. Cole: “Seth Rollins never had a chance!” And there’s your usual WWE line that gives away the ending. Brock throws Rollins over the announcers’ table for a third time and then through the cover of the announcers’ table. They go back in for the opening bell and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar: “SUPLEX CITY B******!” Give him his t-shirt money.

The second suplex sends him flying again as Cole brings up the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in. The F5 is countered though and Rollins gets in a low blow. That means a low superkick and three straight Stomps make Rollins champion at 2:30. It was an exciting start and the whole thing from Lesnar’s first attack ran about 7:00. They had to get the title onto Rollins here (though more importantly off of Lesnar) and this was certainly a memorable way to do it. Certainly more so than when they did it again in a longer form four and a half months later.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

This is your “here are two big names without much else to do” match. Orton eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber and they got in an argument about who built Smackdown. Orton’s big CGI snakes really don’t look great but those things are hit and miss for everyone. AJ headlocks him to start and is promptly driven into the corner. A very early threat of an RKO sends AJ bailing to the corner and it’s another standoff.

Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick to take over, including a boot across the eye to make it even worse. AJ gets in his own dropkick though as they’re pretty even in the early minutes. With Orton taking a breather on the floor, AJ scores with the slingshot forearm, only to get knocked off the apron and hard into the barricade. Back in and the chinlock goes on as the fans start chanting something I can’t understand.

That’s broken up so AJ hits the sliding forearm, setting up the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. An early Styles Clash attempt is countered into a powerslam to give Orton his own near fall as the slow pace continues. The Calf Crusher attempt is countered without much trouble but the second attempt is slapped on in the middle of the ring. Not that the fans are exactly interested but AJ did get it on. That’s broken up in a hurry so AJ heads to the apron for the Phenomenal Forearm.

Orton jumps up to RKO him out of the air (as he had done last week) but AJ holds back, leaving Orton to crash. The springboard 450 gets two but Orton is right back with the backbreaker. Orton’s rather good looking top rope superplex has AJ crashing down for two and an uppercut gets a crazy loud pop (that had to be for something else). The hanging DDT gets no reaction but Orton walking around does, as I’m almost scared to imagine what had the fans’ attention.

AJ hits an enziguri to block the RKO, only to walk into it on the second attempt. That’s only good for two as well and Orton is shocked. With nothing else working, Orton loads up a super RKO, which is escaped without a lot of effort. A Pele sends Orton to the floor and the Phenomenal Forearm knock him even sillier. Back in and Orton still can’t hit the RKO, meaning it’s another Phenomenal Forearm to give AJ the pin at 16:12.

Rating: C-. Things got a bit better by the end but it never got going at any intense level. These two are capable of a lot but it was rather slow paced for the most part and when the match is going that long, it can get pretty tiresome in a hurry. It’s not bad in any sense but it wasn’t exciting and you know these two could do a lot better. That makes it more frustrating than anything else, as I kept waiting for them to get going and they never really did.

Here’s Lacey Evans to continue doing her thing of walking around, smiling, and then walking back.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Rusev/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Bar vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black

The Usos are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. There is something so awesome about seeing the look on Ricochet’s face as he walks onto the stage. You can see what it means to him and there is no faking that kind of a feeling. This also marks Ricochet and Black’s third shot at different titles this week, after Raw and NXT title shots earlier in the week. Jimmy and Black start things off with a feeling out process until Sheamus tags himself in to face Black.

The armbar doesn’t last long as Rusev tags Sheamus and runs Black over. Nakamura comes in for a kick to the back but the rapid fire tags continue, with Jimmy coming in to Samoa drop Black. Nakamura kicks Jimmy into a tag to Ricochet, who does a very spinny headscissors on Cesaro. Since it’s just a headscissors though, Cesaro uppercuts Ricochet down and starts swinging him, as Sheamus forearms everyone else.

After a nearly 40 second swing (geez), the Sharpshooter goes on in the middle of the ring. Black makes the save and strikes away, setting up a springboard moonsault for two on Rusev. Nakamura is back in with some running knees to Black, meaning Ricochet has to make a save of his own. That earns him a swinging Rock Bottom from Rusev and it’s time for the nine man Tower of Doom. Just to show off, Ricochet flips out and lands safely in the corner, setting up the 630 for two on Sheamus. We hit the parade of kicks to the face with the Usos superkicking Sheamus down. The Double Us retains the titles at 10:05.

Rating: B. This was almost all action from bell to bell and that’s all you can do with a match like this one. Let them do whatever they want and get in spot after spot for a little while. They didn’t overstay their welcome either, as this match got in the right amount of time. Good stuff here and one of the more entertaining things all night so far.

Hall of Fame recap. Thankfully Bret being attacked isn’t mentioned whatsoever.

Here’s the class being presented in the stadium:

Honky Tonk Man (How was he not in yet?)

Harlem Heat (Perfectly fine.)

Torrie Wilson (The new low benchmark.)

Brutus Beefcake (Again, how was he not in yet?)

Hart Foundation (Should have been earlier so Neidhart could be there but long overdue as well.)

Sue Aitchison (Warrior Award.)

D-Generation X (I’m sure they had to twist their arms to get here. Deserved of course.)

We recap Miz vs. Shane McMahon. Somehow Shane won the World Cup despite not being in the tournament and Miz, the man he replaced in the finals, was jealous. Miz’s dad thought they should team together so they won the Tag Team Titles. The reign didn’t last long though and they split up, with Shane turning on Miz. Tonight, it’s Falls Count Anywhere. This was in the middle of Shane’s RIDICULOUS run near the top of Smackdown where he was all over the show and beating main eventers, including that Tag Team Title win. Of course he gets a big Wrestlemania match, because that’s what makes sense for such a star.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere, but hang on as Shane needs to hear his introduction three times in a row. With that out of the way, Shane bails to the floor at the bell so the chase is on, with Shane hitting his horrible punches. In a smart move, Shane grabs Miz’s dad (in the front row) and again, the chase goes badly for Miz as Shane hammers away. They head outside again with Shane loading up the announcers’ table.

A monitor shot to the head puts Miz on the table but Miz’s dad blocks the big elbow. Shane gets down so Miz’s dad gets inside for the showdown, with Miz’s dad doing the pose that launched a subplot on the upcoming season of Miz and Mrs. Shane takes him into the corner and stomps away, drawing Miz back in for the beating. They fight to to the floor with Shane falling over the barricade but hold on as Miz wants someone to check on his dad.

With the medics doing their job, Miz dives over the barricade to take Shane down again. They fight over towards one of the big pillars that holds up the canopy over the ring but Shane fights out of the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead Shane grabs a DDT for two but Miz kicks him down off the stage. Shane is sent knee first into a barricade and Miz beats on him with a chair to blow off some more steam.

They wreck announcers’ row with Miz throwing him over every chair he can find, plus throwing some chairs around. Shane gets sent through a table for two, followed by a monitor shot to knock him over a barricade and onto the top of a well placed golf cart. That gives Miz a delayed two so he punches Shane up towards a production tower. A Skull Crushing Finale onto the platform gets two, because he’s Shane and Miz is just a former World Champion.

Shane fights back (of course) and climbs up to the top of the tower. Miz pursues so Shane begs off, even dropping to one knee. That earns him some left hands to the head and Miz superplexes him all the way down (after asking if Shane is ready) onto a crash pad. Worry not though as Shane lands on top for the pin at 15:25.

Rating: D-. I knew the ending was coming here and I still shake my head at the ending. Shane is the boss’ son but my goodness how hard can you push him? The worst part is that it is only going to get worse as the summer goes on, but this was a punch to the gut as Shane wins AGAIN, meaning he isn’t going away anytime soon. The superplex was a nice idea but showing the landing on the pad (which just happened to be there) took away all of the impact that it had. That is, whatever was left before Shane won of course.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: IIconics vs. Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Sasha Banks/Bayley

Banks and Bayley are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Bret Hart is here with Beth and Natalya (who really feel like fill ins for Trish Stratus/Lita), though he doesn’t go beyond the stage. Tamina shoves Bayley down to start and superkicks Natalya for a bonus. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Nia being sent outside for a ram into the steps. Back in and Peyton rolls Sasha up for two and it’s a double kick to put drop Sasha again.

The Hardys’ Spin Cycle gets two on Banks but she’s right back with a backslide for the same. It’s back to Bayley for a sliding clothesline for two on Beth but Billie tags herself in. The IIconics take over on Beth, who is right back with a suplex to both of them at once. Natalya comes in for two but Bayley makes a fast save. The champs get in a fight with Beth and Natalya and it’s a Bank Statement to Phoenix. That’s broken up but the Glam Slam is countered into a rollup into the corner.

Natalya drops Sasha onto Bayley and they get the always fairly dumb looking double Sharpshooter treatment. This time it’s Tamina making the save and Nia comes back in to wreck everyone else. The IIconics get crushed with stereo Samoan drops but Beth shoves Nia off the top to break up a splash. Sasha takes Beth down as well and Bayley drops the top rope elbow, followed by Banks’ frog splash. The Tower of Doom is broken up so Beth hits a super Glam Slam on Bayley, with Kay making a blind tag. With Beth sent outside, Kay steals the pin and the titles at 10:47.

Rating: D. This went on too long and wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. The titles were brand new at this point and they already seemed pretty worthless, which would be proven over the next year. The fallout here is more interesting than the match itself, as you Nia would go away for about a year with double ACL surgery and Sasha (allegedly) threw a fit over losing and took the summer off.

The pilots from the Kickoff Show flyover are in the crowd. That’s always cool.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Kofi replaced the injured Ali in the Elimination Chamber and got down to the final two. That set up one of the most dramatic things that WWE has ever done, as Kofi got inches away from winning the title and the fans ate it up. It was clear that Kofi had to get the title at Wrestlemania or he never would, which sent Kofi and New Day into a crusade to finally get the title shot that had eluded him for eleven years.

After jumping through all kinds of hoops set by Vince McMahon, it took New Day winning a gauntlet match to get the shot, with their longtime rivals the Usos stepping aside in a great show of respect for Kofi. At the same time, Bryan said that Kofi was a B+ player in an awesome role reversal from his legendary run five years earlier.

The match was finally set and it was a heck of a story, as Kofi had put in so many years of building credibility to get here and was finally cashing in. This wasn’t JBL jumping up to the main event scene, as Kofi had pretty much won every title other than the World Title. That’s not a big jump, but it was hard to believe that they would actually pull the trigger here. In other words, this was EXCELLENT and would have headlined any other year.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging and has New Day in his corner, while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a gift for Kofi and promises it for after the match. I had forgotten how nice of a touch Bryan’s eco-friendly belt really was. They stare each other down to start and the fans are behind Kofi, which is almost hard to fathom until you realize that Bryan might be a better heel than face. Kofi’s headlock doesn’t get anywhere so they fight over a backslide. Bryan monkey flips him so Kofi lands on his feet, setting up a dropkick to the floor.

The big dive takes Bryan down again and the roster is behind Kofi in the back. Things slow down a bit as Bryan needs a breather with Rowan. Back in and Bryan uppercuts him a few times to set up the surfboard, which always looks awesome. That’s broken up in a hurry as usual, allowing Kofi to kick away in the corner. Bryan’s moonsault into the running clothesline is countered into something resembling the standing double stomp (almost a Thesz press as Kofi can’t hit it properly) for two.

Kofi’s jumping clothesline works a bit better and the Boom Drop connects. Bryan heads outside again so Kofi tries a springboard dive, which lands ribs first on the announcers’ table. You don’t have to ask Bryan twice to go after the ribs like that so he drops Kofi ribs first across the top rope. The ribs get sent into the corner and it’s off to a waistlock, which works a lot better this time around. Kofi fights up and elbows in the corner but a very quick Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Boston crab.

Bryan’s belly to back superplex is broken up with elbows to the face and Kofi hits a top rope splash to the back for two. They slug it out but Trouble in Paradise is countered again, only to countered into a small package to give Kofi two more. Kofi’s crossbody is rolled through though and Bryan pulls him into a failed LeBell Lock attempt so they’re both down for a second. The running knee is countered into the SOS but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock, with Bryan letting go for some more elbows to the ribs.

Kofi finally gets his foot on the rope and you can hear the sigh of relief. Bryan YES Kicks at the ribs even more but Kofi fires up and tells Bryan to kick him even harder. As Bryan backs away, Kofi throws his own kicks and busts out a reverse suplex for two. They head outside again so Rowan can go after New Day, earning himself Trouble in Paradise. The Midnight Hour on the floor takes care of Rowan and Kofi blocks Bryan’s suicide dive.

Back in and Bryan hits the running knee…..for two and a big pop on the kickout. Bryan has had it and unloads with stomps to the head to set up the LeBell Lock. Kofi breaks out again and blasts Bryan with forearms to the face with more aggression than you usually see from him. Bryan won’t let go of the wrist so Kofi stomps him right back, knocking Bryan silly. Trouble in Paradise gives Kofi the clean pin and the title at 23:45.

Rating: A. That is the definition of the Wrestlemania moment and it holds up to perfection a year later. The fans completely bought into the idea of Kofi fighting through everything and winning the title in the end and that’s all it should have been. Kofi is the kind of guy who has been around forever and built up so much good will that when he finally went after the title, everyone was on his side. That made for a special moment and it was amazing throughout as it’s something that I never thought I would see, but here it is. That’s a great thing to see as rare as it can be.

On top of that, this was an awesome match with both guys giving it everything they had. The story here was perfect with Kofi not being the wrestler Bryan was but knowing that this was his one shot and giving everything he had to achieve his dream when he could. The fans believed in him and there was no way he could lose in this spot. Outstanding stuff and if not for the historic main event, this would have headlined in a landslide. Watch this again and smile a lot.

Post match Woods and Big E. pull out the classic WWE Championship and hand it to Kofi for the first time (Kofi kneeling in the ring and waiting to have it presented to him is a great visual). The pyro goes off and Kofi’s sons get in the ring to celebrate with him and one of them holds up the title, which is almost bigger than he is. We’re not done yet though as Big E. brings in the present from earlier. It’s the first New Day shirt featuring Kofi as champion and his kids get to hold them up for a perfect visual. Woods: “THEY SAID WE COULDN’T MAKE IT! WE MADE IT TO THE TOP!” Outstanding.

Che and Jost are banged up so Bliss introduces them to Dr. Scott Hall and Dr. Kevin Nash. Ok then.

Booker T. is the next guest commentator.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and this year’s comic gear is…..well Mysterio appropriately enough. Now how did he never do that one before? Joe kicks him in the face but Rey is right back with the springboard hurricanrana. The 619 connects but Joe pulls him out of the air into the Koquina Clutch and Rey is out at 1:00, which may have something to do with Rey injuring his ankle on Monday. Booker being annoyed at wasting all the time on prep work is good for a chuckle.

Sneak peak of Batista’s new movie Stuber.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns returned from leukemia after a four month absence and he needs a first victim. Drew has run through the rest of the Shield as a bonus. This is your likely layup result of the show and that’s fine.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew gets played to the ring by the New York Bagpipe Band. They trade shots to the face to start so Reigns snaps off a Samoan drop for an early two. McIntyre is right back with a spinebuster into a jackknife cover for two of his own. The Glasgow Kiss knocks Reigns down again and McIntyre throws him into the corner for two. The chinlock/armbar goes on until Reigns powers out and knocks him to the floor. Reigns’ running kick to the face is blocked though and McIntyre suplexes him down.

Back in and the reverse Alabama slam gives McIntyre two so he takes Reigns up top. That earns him a crotching, only to have Drew pull himself up from the Tree of Woe to send Reigns flying with a belly to belly superplex. Reasons of general heelishness cause McIntyre to slap him in the face, meaning the comeback is on. McIntyre gets knocked outside again for the Samoan drop on the floor, followed by the Superman Punch back inside. The spear finishes McIntyre at 10:06.

Rating: D. The fans didn’t care and why should they have? As usual, it was clear that Reigns was going to win and that happens far too often at Wrestlemania. It’s amazing that Reigns got to come back here but it’s Reigns, who almost always wins, winning again in a match where the ending was obvious throughout. Nothing to see here, and the fans were silent throughout.

Post match Reigns gets to pose in a rather emotional moment.

Here’s Elias for his self described greatest performance ever. He’s on screen playing drums, with a second Elias joining him on piano and the real thing in the ring playing guitar. They jam for a bit and guitar Elias says the other two deserve a standing ovation. Elias teases more members of the band and gets in his catchphrase before loading up the song….but here’s a SPECIAL BULLETIN on Babe Ruth calling his shot in the 1932 World Series.

Cue John Cena in Dr. of Thuganomics gear and the fans seem rather pleased. Cena raps about how he’s about to turn heel and how bad his own movies are. WWE doesn’t stand for Walk With Elias because it really means Wasted Wrestling Experiment. We get a nuts joke, followed by the FU to leave Elias laying. They have history together so this was as good as you were going to get. This was funny for a change if nothing else and that’s a cool Wrestlemania feeling.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Back at Smackdown 1000, Batista had mentioned that HHH never beat him but laughed it off. Then in February, Ric Flair was having a 70^th birthday celebration but Batista attacked him, while asking HHH if he had his attention. This set up the match, with Batista demanding that HHH give him what he wanted (over and over and over). HHH has put up his career just in case the ending was in the slightest bit of doubt.

Shawn Michaels is guest commentator.

Batista vs. HHH

No holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista goes out to glare at Shawn but here’s HHH, riding in a Mad Max style cart because of course he is. Batista drives him straight into the corner to start so HHH is back with some right hands to the face. A backdrop sends Batista outside but he throws HHH over the announcers’ table in a crash. HHH is right back up with a ram into the barricade and busts out a chain to whip Batista over the back.

The chain is pulled into Batista’s mouth (Shawn: “That’s not going to help his movie career.”) and HHH whips him into the steps. To ramp up the pain, HHH busts out some pliers to bend Batista’s fingers around a bit. HHH isn’t done with the toolbox so he grabs some needle nose pliers and ribs Batista’s nose ring out. To be fair, that thing looked horrible. Cole: “HHH just ripped a nose ring out of the nose of Batista.” So the nose ring in his ear is still intact.

Batista’s nose is good enough to drop HHH onto the announcers’ table and then he does it again onto a different one. A chair to the back sets up the shoulders in the corner for two as things have slowed way down. Batista slams him down for two more and let’s go outside again. The steps are set on the table and another table is cleared off as this is taking quite a long time for one big spot.

The huge Batista Bomb through the table is countered with a backdrop onto (not through) the other table and they’re both down again. HHH gets up, spinebusters him through the table, and we get another breather. HHH pulls out the sledgehammer but it’s a spear to cut him down for two. This time it’s HHH knocking the sledgehammer away from Batista, earning himself a spinebuster in the process. The Batista Bomb, which makes HHH drop the sledgehammer again, connects for two.

With nothing else working, Batista brings in the steps but goes up top for some reason. That reason would be so HHH can powerbomb him onto the steps, setting up a Pedigree for two (Because this MUST KEEP GOING!). They’re both down again so here’s Flair to slip HHH the sledgehammer. HHH gets up and uses the steps as a launchpad to hammer Batista in the head. Since that’s not enough to pin him (or KILL HIM as it probably should have), Batista pops up to take the Pedigree for the pin at 25:45.

Rating: D. Why does HHH do this? They could have had the same match with at least ten minutes chopped off but for some reason we needed to get HHH’s latest big epic match, no matter how much people aren’t interested in seeing it. This was terrible with Batista looking like a shell of his glory days (fair enough) and the match going WAY longer than it should have. Horrible match, and did you expect anything else given this style of match’s history?

The B Team model Daniel Bryan WWE Champion shirts but here’s Ron Simmons for the joke.

JBL is your next guest commentator.

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

This is Angle’s retirement match as he can barely get in the ring without injuring himself these days and needs to limp away for good. Corbin is here because we all did something horrible in a past life. Angle goes after him to start but gets knocked into the corner to put him in early trouble. Corbin takes it to the corner and pounds away before mocking Angle’s family a bit. A missed middle rope ax handle sends Corbin throat first into the rope so Angle snaps off some suplexes for two.

Angle walks into a big boot but is fine enough to grab a quickly broken ankle lock. Deep Six gives Corbin two more but he misses a charge, allowing the Angle Slam to connect for two. The straps come down and the ankle lock goes on until Corbin rolls him into the corner for the break. Corbin throws in a You Can’t See Me so Angle punches him into more rolling German suplexes. The moonsault misses though and the End of Days finishes Kurt’s career at 5:59.

Rating: D. Angle does seem fine with putting Corbin over on the way out but this was another step in the seemingly eternal nonsense that was/is the Corbin push. It’s a lot to take and while I can live with Angle going out on his back, it’s a lot to take because Corbin really is going way above his pay grade every time he’s in a match like this.

Post match Angle thanks the fans and asks for one more YOU SUCK chant for the road.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with Lio Rush, is defending and they’ve traded the title, so tonight it’s the Demon to make the match feel big. Balor gets a special entrance by coming down off a raised platform, though it’s not as creepy as his NXT entrances. Lashley has very bright green contacts in for some reason. Some early dropkicks put Lashley on the floor and Balor takes him out with a dive for a bonus.

A hard drive into the apron cuts Balor off though and there’s a suplex to make it worse. Lashley clotheslines him hard to the floor but a Sling Blade gets Balor out of trouble. Rush’s distraction lets Lashley hit a HARD spear through the ropes though and a regular one gets two back inside. Balor fights out of a powerbomb and hits one of his own, setting up the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 4:01.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining enough for something that was going so fast but at the same time, the booking still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Balor has already shown that he can beat Lashley so now he needs to bring up the powers to win? And the extraordinary thing was just a powerbomb? I’m glad to see the Demon again but this wasn’t exactly the most logical thing in the world.

Here’s Alexa Bliss to announce the attendance record of 82,265. Cue R-Truth and Carmella for the Wrestlemania Dance Break (Remember those?).

We recap the main event of Raw Women’s Champion Ronda Rousey and Smackdown Women’s Champion Charlotte defending against Becky Lynch in a winner take all match. Rousey is the unstoppable force, Charlotte is Charlotte and Becky is here because she’s the hottest name in wrestling at the moment and won the Royal Rumble. Tonight the winner leaves with both titles and it’s the biggest women’s match in history.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging both. In a nod to her father and the Four Horsemen, Charlotte lance in a helicopter outside and walks into the stadium. Already inside, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts play Rousey to the ring. There is something so cool about watching Becky walk down the ramp in a wide shot as Cole talks about how she has started a movement. I’m not sure if that is the right term but it looked awesome. The bell rings and even a year later I still can’t believe this happened. The women’s division was a joke just a few years ago and now it’s the biggest match of the year. That’s hard to believe and it’s very cool.

They stare at each other for a good bit to start until Becky goes after Rousey’s arm. Rousey kicks her to the floor without much trouble and that means a Samoan drop into the barricade. Charlotte follows and takes Piper’s Pit but pops right back up for a fall away slam to send Rousey into the barricade for a change. That sets up the required Charlotte vs. Becky fight with Becky getting the better of things but can’t get the Figure Four, allowing Rousey to come and hammer away.

Charlotte breaks up an armbar attempt but gets pulled into a triangle choke over the ropes. Becky hits a running dropkick though and Rousey falls HARD onto the floor in a nasty crash. That leaves Charlotte to knee Becky in the head as the fans get behind Becky in a big way. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees and Becky gets the Disarm-Her but Rousey make the save in a hurry. A double Natural Selection gives Charlotte two each and it’s Becky going outside this time.

For some reason Charlotte tries to slug it out with Rousey, earning herself a knee to the head. Charlotte pulls her into a Boston crab, drawing Becky in for her own save. Becky and Charlotte slug it out again until Charlotte is sent to the apron. Charlotte gets caught up top with a super Bexploder for two but Rousey drops both of them with a high crossbody for a double near fall. The double armbar goes on so Becky and Charlotte powerbomb her for the break. It took three attempts but they finally got out.

Everyone is down for a bit until Becky hits a Rock Bottom for two on Charlotte. Rousey goes after Becky and gets pulled straight into the Disarm-Her so she uses the ropes to power up in the corner. That’s fine with Becky, who puts it on again in the corner until Charlotte boots her in the face. Charlotte’s super Spanish Fly gets two but she might have banged up her knee. Rousey’s knee is banged up as well so Charlotte stomps away and grabs the Figure Four around the post.

After sending Becky into the barricade, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but Becky dives in off the top for another save. Just because, let’s bring in a table but Charlotte decks Becky for taking too long to set it up. Rousey shoves Charlotte off the top and turns the table over because she doesn’t need it. A double spear takes down Becky and Rousey so Charlotte sets up the table in the corner.

Charlotte sends Rousey face first into the table and spears Becky for two more. Back up and Charlotte gets hiptossed through the table, leaving Becky and Rousey to have the slugout we’ve been waiting for. They throw some serious hands but Piper’s Pit is countered into a crucifix (with Rousey’s shoulder a good six inches off the mat in a bad botch) to give Becky both titles at 21:28.

Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t watch it in one sitting this time around but I liked the match a good bit better on a second viewing. These three beat each other up and while Becky winning was the presumed finish, it wasn’t entirely a lock given who she was in there against. It was a heck of a fight and the three of them all came out looking great. This is much more historic than good, but it’s really rather good and that’s always a positive way to go out.

Rousey is ticked as Becky celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The positives are better than the negatives but not by much. There are some flat out bad matches on here but they are overcome by some great feelings with the faces winning all of the big matches for a change. That felt like an old school style as for the first time in what felt like forever, they didn’t cut the fans off for the sake of dragging things out until later. For once it felt like a season finale and that’s what Wrestlemania should be when it gets the chance. Good show, but it could have been a lot better.

How you ask? CUT THE SHOW DOWN! Look at how long this show is and tell me that it’s well put together. There is no need for a sixteen match card, especially with some of the matches that feel tacked on. All three Tag Team Title matches feel like they’re here for the sake of being here and some of the matches just need to be shortened. Either that or find a way to get people to the ring faster. I know it seems simple but how much of these shows are spent on ring entrances alone? Just find a way to shorten things, please.

Overall there are more good things than bad, but this isn’t a show that you need to watch in one sitting. As soon as you get to the point where the show is five hours plus an episode of Smackdown before it starts (and a Smackdown with more wrestling than usual at that), you’re hitting a firm ceiling of how much you can enjoy this. I know you can’t cut out big chunks, but find a way to get this under six hours. Do that and it’s a lot better, but that has been the case for years now and it keeps getting longer. Either way, at least we had enough nice stuff on here, but don’t watch it all at once.

Ratings Comparison

Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Original: C+

Redo: C

Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

Original: C

Redo: D+

Men’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

Original: C+

Redo: B

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Original: D

Redo: D

Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: A-

Redo: A

Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Drew McIntyre vs. Roman Reigns

Original: C-

Redo: D

Batista vs. HHH

Original: D+

Redo: D

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: F

Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: C

Redo: C

Ronda Rousey vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C+

About the same all around, but some of those earlier ones are a good bit off. Still though, too long, despite some of the very good parts.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxv-so-much-for-no-happy-endings/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Main Event
Date: September 16, 2021
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Byron Saxton

We’re on the way to Extreme Rules, which is currently missing out on anything extreme. I can’t really picture that changing here, but Main Event isn’t exactly a show that likes changing things up very often. At best we can get a few good original matches and that’s about all. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Drew Gulak

Ryker powers him into the corner to start so Gulak tries a slap to the face. This goes as well as you would expect as Ryker plants him down and hits a running headbutt. A shot to the throat slows Ryker down though and it’s a headlock takeover to put him on the mat. It takes Ryker a bit longer than expected to suplex his way to freedom as the comeback is on. A top rope hurricanrana of all things sets up the swinging Boss Man Slam (to a much weaker reaction) to finish Gulak at 5:24.

Rating: D. As has been the case with a lot of Ryker matches, this just wasn’t interesting. A good chunk of the match was spent in a headlock on the mat and that’s not exactly the best way to go. Both of them can do better than this, but it felt like they were doing the bare bones to get by.

From Smackdown.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going. Roman says WWE runs sports entertainment in New York. He runs WWE, so therefore, he runs New York City and Madison Square Garden. Therefore, MSG should acknowledge him. That leads to quite the cheering….and here is Brock Lesnar to interrupt. The Usos immediately get between Reigns and Lesnar, as Paul Heyman asks why Lesnar needs to go after the Universal Title. He could do….and then Lesnar grabs the mic.

Lesnar asks why Heyman didn’t tell Reigns he would be at Summerslam and the crowd’s YOU F’D UP chant has to be censored. Reigns glares at Heyman, takes the title and leaves with the Usos. Lesnar does his bouncing dance and Heyman does the old Lesnar introduction. Lesnar says that was great, but wants Heyman to accept his challenge to Reigns before Lesnar kills him.

That would be the challenge for the Universal Title, and Lesnar gives him five seconds. The F5 is loaded up but Reigns makes the save with the Superman Punch. Superkicks from the Usos don’t do much good and the Usos are destroyed as Reigns leaves with Heyman. This was another amazing segment and I was eating up every second of it.

From Smackdown.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Street Profits

The Usos are defending and they start fast by sending the Profits outside. The big dive drops Dawkins and we take a very early break. Back with Dawkins shouldering Jimmy down for two but getting hit in the face. Jimmy knocks Dawkins down for two more but misses a jumping legdrop. That’s enough to bring Ford back in for a huge no hands dive onto both Usos. Cue Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman to watch as we take another break.

Back again with Dawkins grabbing a swinging neckbreaker and handing it back to Ford for the house cleaning. Ford loses a shoe and throws it out but hits a one shoed running Blockbuster for two. A Doomsday Blockbuster gets two and Dawkins is stunned at the kickout. Back up and Dawkins’ running leapfrog over Jey lands in a superkick from Jimmy. Ford pulls Jey outside, leaving Jimmy to get rolled up for two. The kickout sends Dawkins into a superkick though and the Superfly Splash connects for two more. Dawkins is back up to plant Jimmy and Ford adds the twisting frog splash, which draws in Reigns for the DQ at 15:20.

Rating: B-. This was another high energy match but the two commercials didn’t exactly make this much better. What we got was good enough though, even with the screwy ending. Reigns getting so frustrated that he comes in for the save worked out well enough, as he has a lot going on. I’m just not sure who else is around to challenge the Usos at the moment and that’s a problem.

Post match Reigns says he’ll take Brock Lesnar on once he gets done with Finn Balor. Cue Balor….meaning the Demon. Thankfully Michael Cole is right there to walk us through the idea of the Demon because it’s that complicated to understand. The Demon stares Reigns down to end the show.

From Raw.

Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler

Non-title, but it is a Championship Contender’s match, which is treated as more important around here at times. Earlier today, Nia Jax was annoyed at Baszler for costing her the Raw Women’s Title last week but they’ll be fine going forward. Maybe they can get some acting lessons together. Shayna goes after her to start but gets sent outside for the big slingshot dive to send us to a break.

Back with Baszler shaking the ropes to break up a moonsault but some elbows get Charlotte out of the Kirifuda Clutch. Baszler German suplexes the heck out of her for two and kicks away, which brings Charlotte back to life. A shot to the face staggers Baszler and Charlotte sends her outside for the moonsault.

Cue Nia Jax for a distraction though, allowing Shayna to send Charlotte into the steps as we take another break. Back again with Charlotte starting in on Baszler’s knee but missing a middle rope knee to the knee. Nia gets up on the apron to distractions Shayna so Charlotte can hit a big boot for the pin at 14:25.

Rating: C+. It was a fine back and forth match but egads I’m done with trying to care about Nia and Shayna fighting. This has been going on for the better part of a year now and for some reason they keep at it, despite it being WAY past time to have them go their separate ways.

Post match Charlotte stays in the ring and here is Alexa Bliss, carrying both Lillie and a present. It’s a gift for Charlotte, but she doesn’t think Bliss knows her taste. Charlotte collects titles instead of dolls and at some point you have to leave your dolls at home. They do a near cartoon exchange of “you want it/no I don’t” until Charlotte accepts the present. Charlotte: “Well it’s not ticking.” And it’s a Charlotte style Lillie doll, which Bliss names Charlie.

Bliss wanted Charlotte to have someone to play with after she takes the title at Extreme Rules. Bliss: “She’s even a narcissistic little b**** like you!” Charlotte doesn’t want the doll and she’ll send Bliss a Mattel Charlotte figure when she is in the padded room. The fight is on and Bliss kicks her out to the floor. Back in and Bliss grabs a Code Red to send Charlotte running. This was another case of insane things being said as written by bad writers and going WAY too nuts to make it work.

From Smackdown.

It’s time for a contract signing for Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch (not here yet) at Extreme Rules. Belair looks at the contract, but first talks about how she can’t believe she is here. She respects Lynch for being a new mom and a champion but she can’t believe Lynch ran from a fight. Lynch keeps talking about that 26 seconds at Summerslam because Lynch knows what happens when they’re in the ring in a real match. We’ll find that out at Extreme Rules and Belair signs.

Cue Becky, in a big red coat and sunglasses to amp up the heel look. Becky says she knew she had Esther’s number at Summerslam when she saw Belair’s face as her music hit. Belair can be the Man or she can be a fan and there is nothing wrong with sitting out there with the regular people. She’s going to give Belair a rematch and maybe she would have beaten her in twenty seconds here in MSG. So what if she doesn’t sign the contract. Adam Pearce: “What do you mean if you don’t sign it?” Belair: “SIGN THE D*** CONTRACT!”

The fans chant SIGN IT and Becky is confused. She sat at home and heard them chant WE WANT BECKY and she came back at the last second but this is how you treat her? She left her baby girl at home and now they’re picking a flash in the pan over her? Well if you can’t join them, beat them, and there’s the signing. Becky throws the contract at Belair and leaves. Becky is getting the heel stuff to work, but the “Belair gets a fair match” stuff isn’t exactly accurate. She had one at Summerslam and lost. Stop acting like she was some kind of a victim.

Lucha House Party vs. Angel Garza/Humberto Carrillo

Garza and Metalik tried takedowns for no counts to start and come up with a handshake. Metalik gets a boot up in the corner so Dorado can come in with a top rope hurricanrana. Garza and Carrillo are sent outside for the stereo dives and we take a break. Back with Dorado hitting a splash off of Metalik’s shoulders to crush Carrillo. Garza gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over and come in though and Carrillo adds a powerbomb for two.

Carrillo and Metalik both head up top with the ladder snapping off a jumping super hurricanrana, allowing the double tag. Dorado kicks both of them in the face and gets two off a high crossbody. The Golden Rewind kind of connects with Garza and the moonsault kind of connects for two, leaving Carrillo to flip dive onto Metalik on the floor. Garza kicks Dorado in the face, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS and finishes with the Wing Clipper at 8:07.

Rating: C. These teams work well together and that shouldn’t be a surprise after watching Main Event at any point in the last year or so. It’s another case where you could have any of them taking up some time on Raw and being completely acceptable, though you are not likely to see that anytime soon. It was certainly better than Ryker vs. Gulak at least.

We look at Seth Rollins injuring Edge.

On Raw, Big E. promised to cash in Money in the Bank.

From Raw.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and MVP/Riddle as the seconds. They head outside early on where Orton has to save Riddle by sending Lashley into various things. A ram into the announcers’ table gives Orton one back inside but Lashley sends him into the corner. Lashley misses a charge into the post but he is fine enough to counter the hanging DDT. Orton gets sent outside and comes up holding his leg, only to be fine enough to drop Lashley onto the barricade. A clothesline sends Lashley over said barricade and we take a break.

Back with Orton forearming away and hitting a superplex to send them both crashing down. The delayed near fall sends Lashley outside, where he picks Orton up and sends him head first into the post. Back in and a running shoulder hits Orton’s ribs in the corner to drop him in pain. A neckbreaker gives Lashley two and we hit the chinlock. Orton fights up and hits a heck of a clothesline, setting up the scoop powerslam for two.

The RKO takes too long to set up though and Lashley hits the spear for the big near fall. The Hurt Lock doesn’t go on and it’s the RKO to drop Lashley…who rolls to the apron, with an assist from MVP. Orton gives MVP and RKO and the fans are WAY behind him…until another spear retains the title at 13:18.

Rating: C+. You had two talented guys getting some time here and it worked well as a result. I liked the match and even though it was unlikely that Orton was going to win, there was just enough of a chance and that makes things so much better. They built up how fresh of a match this was and while that wasn’t a game changer, it was a nice detail to remember.

Post match the brawl is on again with Riddle making the save. That earns him a beating as well, so Lashley puts him through the announcers’ table. Lashley comes up holding his knee though….and it’s cash in time!

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Big E.

Lashley is defending….or he would be if not for his knee injury. Big E. slaps him in the face and that’s enough to ring the bell. Lashley takes him to the mat and the brawl is on. A spear cuts Big E. down for two but he goes back to Lashley’s bad leg. The Big Ending gives Big E. the pin and the title at 1:18!

New Day comes out to celebrate and a lot of pyro goes off to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The recap stuff helped a good bit here as you can tell WWE is slowly starting to fix some things. They have nowhere to go but up at this point, at least on Monday, so it is quite the relief to see things getting better. The original stuff was as useless as it often tends to be on Main Event, and I can’t even pretend to be surprised anymore.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 20, 2021
Location: PNC Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for Extreme Rules and in theory that should mean that it is time to actually add something EXTREME to the card. It would be nice to have the show actually live up to its name, though I think you can guess what kind of stipulations we are going to be seeing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Big E. cashing in Money in the Bank to win the WWE Title last week.

Here is New Day to celebrate Big E.’s title win. Big E. is rather emotional as he soaks in the YOU DESERVE IT chants and says this feels like Thanksgiving to him. He is thankful for everyone who has been here chanting New Day Rocks and (and those who chanted NEW DAY SUCKS).

There are some great people here to celebrate with and one more above watching down (cue the BRODIE chants, and Big E. has to pause for a second). As for tonight though, it is time for some business because the New Day has to deal with the Bloodline. This is their show though and they will send Bloodline packing, because…..and they take so long loading up the catchphrase that the Bloodline cuts it off.

Bloodline vs. New Day

Kofi and Jimmy start things off with Roman Reigns pausing to point at the ceiling a lot. Jimmy gets snapmared down and Kofi adds a running kick to the chest, setting up Woods’ middle rope elbow for two. It’s time to start in on the arm but it’s off to Jey in a hurry. Kofi makes a blind tag though and springboards in with a high crossbody for two of his own. Reigns is sick of this though and pulls Kofi outside for rams into the announcers’ table and the post.

A big staredown takes us to a break and we come back with Kofi crawling for the tag but Jimmy knocks Woods off the apron. Kofi gets sent into the corner but runs up the buckles for a spinning top rope dropkick. The double tag brings in Reigns and Big E. for the heavyweight showdown. Overhead belly to belly suplexes send Reigns flying and a regular belly to belly drops him again. Big E. has to get rid of Jey though and Reigns is back up with a release Rock Bottom.

The Superman Punch is countered into another belly to belly but Reigns slips out of the Big Ending. It’s back to Woods as Big E. tosses Kofi onto the Usos but Reigns is back up with the Superman Punch. Woods superkicks Reigns for two but here is Bobby Lashley to take out a lot of people, with the referee watching the whole thing. Since we can’t have a DQ in this thing, Reigns spears Woods for the pin at 13:04.

Rating: B-. The ending really dragged this down, as this is the kind of match that could have just as easily ended with a DQ, but instead the solution is to make the referee look like an imbecile. Lashley being all ticked off about losing the title is a fine way to go, but could you at least make it look better? The match itself was the kind of big time showdown you would expect from these teams, but the ending just made my head hurt (for the first time tonight).

Post match Lashley spears Reigns down and hits another one to drive Big E. through the barricade.

Post break Bobby Lashley goes to see Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to rant about Big E. Lashley insists he can beat Big E. or Roman Reigns, so the bosses stare at him.

MVP is out of action with a broken rib after Randy Orton gave him an RKO last week.

Riddle has made sure that he and Orton have the same Spotify playlists and talks about how they are on a roll. Orton isn’t impressed, even as Riddle talks about how Orton can beat AJ Styles tonight. Riddle wonders what his spirit animal would be, thinking it might be a mongoose. Orton thinks Riddle is confusing a movie with real life and says he’s ready for AJ tonight. Oh and the headphones Riddle gave him? Pretty cool. Riddle responds by singing Orton’s theme song.

We recap Eva Marie vs. Doudrop.

Eva Marie vs. Doudrop

Hold on though as Eva says this isn’t a fair match because she’s put together and Doudrop is a mess. Girls like Doudrop can’t beat women like her but we ring the bell anyway. Doudrop chases her around the ring to start, catches her, and finishes with the basement crossbody at 1:19. This is in no way, shape or form different than their previous match, except that it was more recent.

Post match, Doudrop declares the Eva-Lution dead. Until their next three matches I’m sure.

Big E. storms into the bosses’ office and says he wants Bobby Lashley and Roman Reigns tonight. They still say nothing.

Post break, Paul Heyman comes in to see the bosses and goes on about how people have come in here and complained about everything tonight. Heyman doesn’t do that, because he has a message from Roman Reigns. Sonya Deville cuts him off and makes a triple threat match for tonight. Now go tell Reigns that it is official.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Omos and Riddle are here too. Orton wastes no time in taking AJ down with a headlock but it’s broken up in a hurry for a staredown. The armbar with some hand cranking has AJ in trouble again but the threat of an RKO sends him bailing to the floor. Back in and Orton grabs a suplex for one as this is total dominance so far. Orton starts the Garvin Stomp, allowing Riddle to strike Orton’s pose.

Omos offers a bit of interference though and that means it’s an ejection, with Riddle getting beaten up for dancing in celebration. AJ finally gets something going by knocking Orton outside for the slingshot forearm. Omos finally leaves and we take a break. Back with Orton whipping him chest first into the corner and hitting some clotheslines. Orton snaps off the powerslam for two and knocks AJ out to the apron. The hanging DDT is broken up though and AJ tries the Phenomenal Forearm but has to settle for a sleeper.

That’s broken up as well and Orton busts out a t-bone suplex of all things. AJ is back with a shot to the head but the Styles Clash is countered with a backdrop, which is countered into a cradle for two. A Lionsault of all things gives AJ two so it’s time for the Forearm. Orton teases the RKO counter so AJ drops back to the apron, allowing Orton to kick him down and hit the hanging DDT. The RKO finishes for Orton at 14:57.

Rating: B. You had two talented wrestlers doing their thing here and it worked out well, even with the extra time that they had. I know Orton might not be the most popular, but he can have a quality match with just about anyone and that is an incredibly valuable thing to have on your roster. The same is true for Styles, but he loses points for not having the mustache.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Shayna Baszler. They teamed together, they argued, they won, they argued, they lost, they argued, they lost some more, they argued, they did the same for about six more months before we FINALLY got to this match.

Nia Jax vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia brags about how she is the talented one and grabs a Samoan drop, only to put Shayna down and say it was that easy. Baszler knees her way out of the corner and a big kick to the head puts Jax down on all fours. Another kick to the face sets up the Kirifuda Clutch, which is countered with straight power. Shayna gets it again so Jax drops back onto her….and passes out at 2:22. I didn’t see that one coming but I’ll take it.

Post match Shayna takes her outside and kicks the mostly out cold Jax in the head. Shayna puts Jax’s hand in the steps for a running stomp to make Jax scream. Shayna looks conflicted but stomps on the arm anyway, meaning it’s higher pitched screaming. This was total destruction of Jax and should mean a pretty lengthy hiatus, which is a good thing at the moment.

Angel Garza/Humberto Carrillo vs. Mansoor/Mustafa Ali

Garza and Carrillo say they’re family and both rather handsome so why not team together. Ali gets taken down in a hurry to start, setting up a double slingshot suplex for two. Carrillo grabs an early chinlock but Ali is back up in a hurry for the tornado DDT. Mansoor and Garza come in with the former kicking him in the head. A belly to back suplex/top rope double stomp combination gets two on Garza with Carrillo making the save. Everyone heads outside with Garza posting Ali HARD (that was a great sound) and it’s a Muta Lock/dropkick combination to finish Ali at 2:43. I’ve wanted more Garza for a bit and this worked.

Video on Karrion Kross.

Rhea Ripley and Nikki Ash come out to tell us about how great Connor’s Cure really is. They dedicate their Women’s Tag Team Title shot to the sick children and hold up a V for victory over cancer. Ignore Rhea partially forgetting her lines here, as she seems to be rather emotional about the whole speech.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Natalya/Tamina vs. Nikki Ash/Rhea Ripley

Natalya and Tamina are defending (for the first time on TV for the first time in about four months) and I don’t like their odds here after that promo. Nikki gets knocked into the corner to start and Tamina stomps away as the champs control early. The Superfly Splash misses but it’s back to Natalya to cut Nikki off. Ripley takes Tamina outside and Riptides her onto the apron. That leaves Ash to small package Natalya for the pin and the titles at 2:15. That’s about as much hype as Natalya and Tamina’s reign deserved as it came to an end.

We recap Charlotte throwing her version of Lillie in the trash.

It’s time for Alexa’s Playground. Alexa Bliss brings out her guest for the week, and it’s a doozy: Charlotte. After picking up a microphone off the rocking horse, Charlotte says she would rather remind people that Bliss used to be a competitor. Bliss: “There she is ladies and gentlemen: the fun police.” Bliss wants a girl’s night between the two of them and Lillie, but there is no Charlie (Charlotte’s doll).

Worry not though because Bliss has Charlie….who gets a chant of her own. Charlotte wants the real Alexa Bliss, because this is just a way to hide how fragile Bliss really is. Start by getting rid of the black lipstick and then realize that Lillie is more popular than Bliss. How did Charlotte go from main eventing Wrestlemania to playing with dolls on Raw? She has beaten everyone and now she has to beat an adult who has to dress like a kid. Should she beat Bliss up tonight or wait until Sunday?

Bliss mocks Charlotte for being the best ever and points out that Charlotte has lost more titles than any woman ever. Without a title, who is Charlotte anyway? Without a title, she doesn’t have anything and her insecurities are stamped right on her forehead. Bliss says that’ not original, with Charlotte saying they don’t want to get into the whole lack of originality thing. Bliss calls her a narcissistic little b**** and says at least she knows who she is. You can call her crazy, but on Sunday, you can call her champion.

Charlotte shoves her so Bliss charges, earning herself a big boot. Charlie is ripped apart but Bliss gets up before Charlotte can get to Lillie. The DDT sends Charlotte running. The stuff where they were actually saying things to each other was good, but then it becomes about the dolls all over again and any positives are completely lost.

Drake Maverick and the usual band of idiots have a whiteboard plan to capture Reggie. A net is involved and they capture Drew Gulak instead. Reggie escapes and Maverick is livid.

Sheamus vs. Jeff Hardy

If Hardy wins, he’s in the US Title match at Extreme Rules and Damian Priest is on commentary. Sheamus grabs a headlock takeover to start and then hits a shoulder to put him down again. Jeff drives him into the corner but has to elbow his way to freedom. That’s enough to send Sheamus outside but Poetry in Motion is countered into a drop onto the apron. Sheamus rips the face shield off and we take a break.

Back with Hardy hammering away and getting two off a middle rope splash. Sheamus kicks him in the face and nails the top rope clothesline for two. The knee to the face gets the same but the Brogue Kick is countered into the Twist of Fate. The Swanton hits knees though (egads that looked bad) but Hardy grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. I can go for these two having a nice match like this and that’s what we got here. Hardy being added to Sunday is a good idea as we’ve done Sheamus vs. Priest before and it is a good idea to add something fresh. I’m not sure what to expect on Sunday and that’s the right way to go.

Post match Sheamus goes outside to yell at Priest and the fight is on.

Bobby Lashley vs. Roman Reigns vs. Big E.

Non-title and Lashley and Big E. start brawling to start fast. Big E. takes him to the apron for the splash as Reigns stands back and watches. Some trash talking takes too long though and Reigns hits the apron dropkick on Big E. as we take an early break. Back with Big E. grabbing an abdominal stretch on Lashley until Reigns breaks that up. Reigns’ jumping clothesline drops Big E. for two but Lashley breaks up the apron dropkick.

They head back inside with Reigns hitting a heck of a Samoan drop for two on Big E. as Lashley is back up. Reigns takes Lashley up top but Big E. turns it into a Tower of Doom as we take a break. Back with Big E. throwing Reigns around with some suplexes until Lashley breaks that up. A delayed vertical suplex drops Reigns bug Big E. takes them both down and hits a double Warrior Splash.

The Big Ending rocks Reigns but Lashley pulls Big E. outside and puts him through the announcers’ table. Back in and Reigns Superman Punches Lashley to break up the spear but Lashley’s second attempt connects. Big E. breaks up that cover but has to block the Hurt Lock. Reigns makes the save with a Superman Punch and Big E. hits the spear to drive Reigns through the ropes. Back in and the Big Ending hits Reigns but Lashley breaks it up with a chair. Lashley unloads on Big E. with the chair….and walks into a spear to give Reigns the pin at 20:10.

Rating: B. This worked very well as they followed the formula for most good triple threat matches: let a bunch of people hit each other really hard until one scores a fall. At the same time, this probably sets up a chairs match between Lashley and Big E., which certainly works as a Raw main event. Reigns winning over Lashley is fine here as a champion didn’t take a fall and it came at the end of a very hard hitting match. Rather good main event.

Overall Rating: C+. I rather liked this and I can’t remember the last time that has been the case with Raw. The biggest positive here was the lack of anything terrible. There were certainly flaws and some of the stuff didn’t make a ton of sense, but what matters the most is there was no moment where I wanted to switch to a good folk dancing competition. I have no reason to believe that the show is getting better in the long term (though the destruction of Nia Jax gives me a bit of hope) but for a one off show, I will absolutely take this over the drek we’ve been seeing for….well years really.

Results
Bloodline b. New Day – Spear to Woods
Doudrop b. Eva Marie – Basement crossbody
Randy Orton b. AJ Styles – RKO
Shayna Baszler b. Nia Jax – Kirifuda Clutch
Humberto Carrillo/Angel Garza b. Mansoor/Mustafa Ali – Muta Lock/dropkick combination to Ali
Rhea Ripley/Nikki Ash b. Tamina/Natalya – Small package to Natalya
Jeff Hardy b. Sheamus – Sunset flip
Roman Reigns b. Big E. and Bobby Lashley – Spear to Lashley

 

 

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Main Event
Date: September 9, 2021
Location: FTX Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Kevin Patrick

We’re on the way to Extreme Rules and because of course it does, Main Event becomes more and more like its traditional self. There is very little taking place on this show that you need to see and that should not be a surprise to anyone paying attention. This is how Main Event goes and I don’t think there is any reason to think otherwise. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Dana Brooke vs. Doudrop

Dana can’t power her around for a change and gets shoved into the corner. A running shoulder bounces off of Doudrop but a headscissors manages to take her down. Back up and Doudrop runs her over but Dana kicks her in the head. For some reason Dana thinks a suplex is a good idea, with Doudrop shoving her away without much trouble.

Back up and Dana’s tornado DDT is countered into a suplex but Doudrop’s next suplex is countered into a small package for another near fall. A running splash in the corner sets up a missed Cannonball though and Brooke is back with a sitout bulldog. Brooke misses the Swanton though and it’s the running seated crossbody to finish for Doudrop at 4:58.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? There isn’t much that can be done with Doudrop outside of a match like this and it worked out about as well as it could have. I’m glad to have Brooke back but I think we are long past the point of expecting her to be able to get up to the next level. Sometimes it just isn’t going to happen and I think we have long since been at that point with her.

We look at Finn Balor challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title.

From Smackdown.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Roman Reigns

Balor is challenging, but here are the Usos to jump him before the bell. The big beatdown is on and Balor is left laying until the Street Profits come in to chase the Usos off. Reigns comes out for the match and we take a break. Back with Balor saying he can go so we get the Big Match Intros. Reigns is smart enough to throw Balor down onto the bad ribs to start as the ribs are banged up again. Balor tries to fight back but charges into an uppercut. A spinebuster plants him again and we take a break.

Back with Reigns missing the Superman Punch, allowing Balor to hit a Pele for a breather. Balor starts the comeback but gets sent outside to cut him off again. Reigns gets pulled down into the ring skirt though and Balor hammers away, including the big flip dive. They head back inside where the Coup de Grace misses, allowing Reigns to hit the Superman Punch for two. Balor is back up with 1916 for two of his own and the Coup de Grace connects for a VERY close two. The kickout includes a low blow and Reigns hammers away on the downed Balor, setting up the guillotine choke to retain at 10:31.

Rating: B-. There wasn’t the most drama here but the Coup de Grace near fall was quite good. They have an out for Balor with the Usos’ attack and that could set up the rematch. What we got here was good though and it felt like a main event, which is what they were shooting for with this one. Balor isn’t going to be hurt off a loss to Reigns, so it isn’t some career stopper for him either.

Post match Reigns and Heyman go to leave, but the lights flicker a bit. Reigns isn’t sure what that was to end the show.

From Raw.

Women’s Title: Nia Jax vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and Nia has Shayna Baszler in her corner. The bell rings and Shayna grabs the mic, saying that she’s interested in seeing if Jax is going to choke. Charlotte jumps Nia and it turns into quite the scrap as we try to recreate last week. Nia tells her to pull her hair and Charlotte bails while seeming to throw in a crotch chop. Charlotte grabs her title and goes to leave but stops to yell at Shayna.

That’s enough for Nia to pull her inside and run Charlotte over. A superplex is countered into a powerbomb out of the corner to give Charlotte two and we take a break. Back with Charlotte hitting(ish) her moonsault to the floor but she has to stop and yell at Shayna. They head inside again where Nia hits a headbutt into a splash in the corner before taking Charlotte up top. Shayna offers another distraction though and Charlotte hits a super Natural Selection to retain at 8:42.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what to think of this one but it’s nice to see Nia and Shayna seemingly being FINALLY ready to split. Charlotte and Nia teased another worked shoot deal here and while it wasn’t good, it was on a different planet than last week’s all time disaster. Charlotte gets away from Nia for now (in theory) and that’s the best thing for everyone involved.

Post match Alexa Bliss pops up on screen to invite Charlotte to come to the Playground. Lillie wants to try on one of the robes! Charlotte says no, with Alexa asking if Charlotte knows what it’s like to be stuck with a maniac. Bliss: “Of course you do. You’re a Flair.”. They’ll just bring the Playground to her, so here is Alexa, with Lillie, in the ring. Charlotte asks if Bliss wants a title match and says fine, but this is her playground.

Cedric Alexander vs. Ricochet

Feeling out process to start with Cedric going after the arm. That lasts for all of three seconds as Ricochet is back up to start flipping away. A cradle gives Ricochet two and it’s time to chop it out. Ricochet gets the better of things but they head to the apron where Alexander shoves him into the post.

We take a break and come back with Alexander kicking him between the shoulders for two. The chinlock goes on for a short while until Ricochet fights up with a kick to the head. A dropkick puts Alexander down and the springboard clothesline makes it worse. Alexander is back up with a Michinoku Driver for two of his own but Ricochet grabs a cradle for two more. Back up and Ricochet grabs a not perfect looking poisonrana into the Recoil for the pin at 9:13.

Rating: C+. I don’t think it’s any surprise that these two are going to have a good match against each other, but it would be a surprise to see them getting to do something else. For the life of me I can’t imagine Ricochet wanting to stick around WWE at this rate and could you really blame him for wanting to leave? He is that talented and this is about as good as it gets for him. Maybe that changes in the future, but why would I really believe that is going to be the case?

From Raw.

Tag Team Turmoil

RKBro is watching at ringside and New Day is in at #1 and the Viking Raiders are in at #2. Kofi jumps over Ivar a few times to start and elbows him into the corner. Ivar sends him into the corner instead though and Erik drives Ivar into Kofi for the big crash. Back up and Kofi slips away, allowing the tag to Woods. That’s fine with Erik, who sends Woods flying with a suplex. Woods is back with a tornado DDT into a superkick, with Kofi adding a spinning kick to the head for two.

Erik sends Kofi outside but Woods blocks the knee and comes up with a discus forearm. Kofi comes back in and dives onto the Vikings on the floor, only to be caught and thrown into Woods as we take a break. Back with Kofi striking away at both Raiders and hitting the Boom Drop on Erik. Ivar comes back in for the springboard elbow/belly to back suplex combination for a near fall. A hurricanrana gets Kofi out of trouble though and it’s back to Woods…who is powerbombed by Erik. The top rope splash gets two but Kofi takes out Ivar, allowing Woods to small package Erik to advance at 10:06.

Jinder Mahal and Veer, with Shanky, are in at #3 and Woods hits a fast high crossbody for two on Mahal. Veer comes in to run Woods over but Kofi gets cut off by Shanky on the floor as we take a break. Back with Woods kicking Mahal away and Kofi coming in with a kick to the head. Everything breaks down and Daybreak gets rid of Mahal and Veer at 17:17 total.

Lucha House Party, with new music, is in at #4. The luchadors start fast and moonsault off the apron onto New Day on the floor. Metalik splashes Woods from Dorado’s shoulders and Dorado wins a chop off. Dorado goes up for a high crossbody but Woods seems to counter into a Codebreaker….I think.

Commentary doesn’t seem too sure either but Metalik cuts off the tag anyway. The tag goes through a few seconds later anyway though and Kofi comes in with the top rope splash to Metalik’s back. Woods comes back in and gets taken down again, with Dorado hitting a moonsault for two with Kofi making the save. Woods cuts Dorado off with a faceplant though and Kofi cuts off the save for the pin at 21:46.

Mace and T-Bar are in at #5 and we take another break. Back again with Woods fighting out of Mace’s chinlock but getting chopped back up against the ropes. A running knee in the corner sets up a nerve hold to keep Woods in trouble. T-Bar comes in with an elbow to the face and a chinlock of his own as this is grinding pretty badly. Woods kicks his way to freedom but T-Bar sends Kingston into the barricade to cut him off. That leaves T-Bar to load up Feast Your Eyes, which is countered into a rollup to give Woods the pin at 30:15.

Hold on though as the big beatdown is on from Mace and T-Bar until Mansoor and Mustafa Ali are in at #6. Mansoor goes after Mace and T-Bar out of sportsmanship while Ali stays on the floor and asks what he’s doing. Mace and T-Bar wreck Ali and Mansoor, which somehow isn’t a DQ because reasons.

Mace holds up the steps and Mansoor is sent into them as Graves says Mace and T-Bar can’t be disqualified. That’s not how DQ’s work but it’s not like consistency matters in WWE. Everyone is down and we take another break, coming back with….well the match is on hiatus actually, as Sonya Deville and Adam Page have ruled that they will continue after New Day and Mansoor/Ali have had a breather.

From Raw.

Tag Team Turmoil

RKBro is at ringside again. We’ll continue with New Day vs. Mansoor/Mustafa Ali as Ali low bridges Kofi to the floor to put New Day in trouble. Woods comes back with a dropkick to Ali’s back though and Kofi grabs a superplex (off of Mansoor’s back) on Ali to send him outside. Woods’ back is too banged up for a fireman’s carry so Mansoor wants to give him a break but Ali tags himself in and kicks away. Kofi is right back in for a high crossbody on Ali but going after Mansoor takes too much time. Ali gets in a superkick and goes up top, only to miss the 450. Trouble in Paradise into Woods’ top rope elbow finishes Ali at 4:18.

AJ Styles/Omos are in at #7 and we come back after a break with Woods being whipped into the corner to damage his back even more. Omos comes in to stand on Woods’ back and send him into the corner again. A running splash from behind crushes Woods again and Styles grabs the chinlock. Woods fights up and sends Styles outside before a double clothesline gives us a double breather. Omos knocks Kofi out of the air though and we take a break. Back with Kofi hitting Trouble in Paradise for two on AJ with Omos making the save. With Woods down, the Styles Clash finishes Kofi at 11:42.

Bobby Lashley and MVP are in at #8 to complete the field and it’s Lashley vs. AJ to get going. Lashley kicks him into the corner but AJ is back up with the Phenomenal Blitz into the Pele. Styles might have banged up his ankle though and it’s off to Omos to face Lashley. Omos wants the test of strength but has to pull his arms back in so Lashley can reach both hands.

The fans are WAY behind Lashley as he drives Omos into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Lashley can’t suplex him though and Omos picks him up for a delayed gordbuster. Lashley heads outside and starts yelling at Orton, allowing AJ to dive off of the announcers’ table onto both of them. Omos sends Riddle into the barricade and AJ takes out MVP. Back in and the Phenomenal Forearm misses Lashley, who spears AJ down for the pin and the title shot at 27:50 (2:28:27 total).

Rating: C+. That’s for both parts of the match as I try to figure out what I thought of the whole thing. It was certainly good with solid action and a nice story with New Day, but at the same time, it wasn’t like there were more than three teams with a real shot at winning. You knew it would be AJ/Omos, New Day or Lashley/MVP, and it wasn’t going to be New Day as soon as they started. What we got was good and I understand the break in the middle (a match that long is going to tank ratings in a hurry without one), but it was about a third of the show and that’s a long time on any one match.

Post match Omos gives Lashley the double chokeslam before leaving. Lashley gets up and it’s an RKO to leave Lashley laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It’s another Main Event and this time around they had a lot to cover from the previous shows. Even a clipped version of Tag Team Turmoil is better than nothing and it isn’t like there was anything else to to cover from the show. Hopefully we are going to get something a little more interesting on the way to Extreme Rules though, because this wasn’t all that great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.