Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night Two
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fair Park, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Kevin Gill

It’s the second half of the show and in this case, it needs to get a pretty big upgrade over the first half. Night one was a decent enough show, but it wasn’t memorable, which is the point of a show like this. Now that being being said, this show is built around the Clusterf*** Battle Royal, which could be quite the mess. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

We open with Joey Janela talking about beating Sean Waltman last night and wanting his flowers. He wonders why the fans hate him now but Spring Break needs a lethal dose of poison to turn it back into what it is supposed to be. This year, he is entering the Clusterf*** so he can end it once and for all. Maybe just don’t run it then?

Matt Cardona vs. Chris Dickinson

Chelsea Green is here with Cardona, who is currently the king, meaning yes he does have a Macho King crown. Green gets in an ALL HAIL THE DEATHMATCH KING and the fans are all over Cardona again. Cardona insults GCW and says they are the power couple of wrestling. Six years ago, he won the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania, but now he’s in this piece of garbage ring. If he was in WWE, like he should be, he would be celebrating his friend Mark Calaway, who he will see in the Hall of Fame one day.

Dickinson comes out with….MISSY HYATT to even things out, which is one of those names that makes this show feel fun. Both pairs share good luck kisses before the match, with Hyatt’s leaving Dickinson woozy. Dickinson wrestles him to the mat to start but Cardona is up to yell at Hyatt. That doesn’t work well for Dickinson, who grabs a cross armbreaker to send Cardona bailing to the floor.

Back in and Green grabs Dickinson’s foot for a distraction so Cardona can stomp away. After throwing his shirt at Hyatt, Cardona chokes with the wrist tape and then his hand for a bonus. The running forearm drops Dickinson again and a neckbreaker gives Cardona two. It’s already door time but Cardona spends too much time mocking the crowd, allowing Dickinson to backdrop him through the door in the corner.

The slugout is on with Cardona going to the eyes, only to get blasted with a running clothesline. The brainbuster gives Dickinson two but Green offers a distraction, allowing Cardona to nail a spear for two. Missy finally grabs Cardona’s boot and slaps Green, allowing Dickinson to hit a Death Valley Driver for two of his own.

Green offers another distraction so Cardona can hit a low blow into the Rough Ryder for two. Now it’s Green coming in and hitting Cardona with Missy’s loaded purse by mistake, allowing Dickinson to clothesline her down. The toss Razor’s Edge is enough for Dickinson to pin both of them at once at 12:43.

Rating: C+. You really can see why the GCW fans can’t stand Cardona in this run as he is one of the most annoying and obnoxious heels you could want to see. He is playing up the idea of being a big shot and that is one of the best ways to get heat from anyone. Dickinson is a decent power guy and looked good here, though Missy kind of disappeared for large chunks of the match.

Biff Busick vs. Tony Deppen

Feeling out process to start with Deppen trying to go to the mat to little success. Back up and Busick goes to the armbar, which has Deppen bailing to the ropes. Busick chops the heck out of Deppen, whose chops back have no effect. They head outside with Busick uppercutting away but a chop only hits the post. With Busick trying to shake it off, Deppen hits a flip dive off the apron and they head back inside.

Busick is fine enough to knee him down and the figure four necklock sends Deppen to the ropes again. Back up and Busick gets a little more violent by holding Deppen in place for some slaps to the face. Deppen is smart enough to go after Busick’s bad hand but Busick hits a running uppercut to take him down again.

Busick misses a charge though and Deppen hits a suicide flip dive for two back inside. Back up and the slugout goes to Busick until Deppen goes for the hand and grabs a Kimura of all things. With that broken up, Busick wins another strike off but Deppen avoids a charge in the corner. A running knee finishes Busick at 11:40.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you need two people to hit each other really hard and you got at least half of that here with Busick’s beating. Busick might not be a star in the making, but he’s an established hard hitter in the middle of the card and that should be enough to get him quite a few jobs. At the same time, you have Deppen as one of the better heels I’ve seen in a bit, as he is just straight up unlikable. Keep going with that and he’ll be fine.

Post match Deppen thanks Busick for the match but tells anyone who doesn’t believe in him what they can kiss.

Mike Bailey vs. Jordan Oliver

Bailey does his bow and they shake hands to start. Oliver does his pose so Bailey kicks him in the face and strikes away but Oliver is back up with chops of his own. Bailey’s leapfrog is countered into a faceplant and Oliver sends him outside for a big dive. Some kicks send Oliver through some chairs though and Bailey knees him in the chest.

Back in and Bailey kicks him in the chest for two, followed by the YES Kicks to make it worse. Bailey hits a running kick to the face in the corner and they strike it out again. Oliver snaps off a release German suplex and a sitout powerbomb for two but Bailey sends him outside. There’s the springboard moonsault to the floor and they strike it out on the apron.

Bailey gets the better of things and hits the moonsault knees, setting up the bouncing kicks back inside. The big kick to the head looks to set up the Ultimate Weapon but Oliver counters it with a cutter. A handspring cutter gets two so Oliver goes up, only to get pulled down with something like a One Winged Angel for the pin at 10:01.

Rating: C+. As is usually the case with Bailey, the action was good but he continues to have such a punchable face that it is hard to get into his matches. The good thing here was he didn’t have the stupid no selling that drags down every good thing he does, making this slightly easier to watch than most of his matches. Oliver has come a long way but still has a good bit to go before he moves up to the next level.

Effy says he shouldn’t be here but tonight he’ll beat Minoru Suzuki, have his own show tomorrow, and then maybe he’ll come for some gold.

Effy vs. Minoru Suzuki

Allie Katch is here with Effy. They both stick their jaws out with offers of a free shot but Effy’s attempt at a kiss gets him slapped. Suzuki slaps him down and then a kick to the face puts Effy on the floor. They head outside with Effy telling him to chop as hard as he can. That’s fine with Suzuki, who mocks Effy’s return chops.

A big boot sends Effy through the chairs and Suzuki cranks on the arm back inside. Effy tries some forearms but gets dropped with a single one from Suzuki. Then Effy bites Suzuki’s nipple and northern lights suplexes him for two. The big kiss staggers Suzuki but it’s a slap to the face and the Gotch style piledriver to give Suzuki the pin at 9:04.

Rating: C. Effy’s stuff may or may not be your cup of tea but Suzuki more or less squashed him here in a match with little to no doubt about the outcome. Effy was doing little more than comedy here so it isn’t like there was much to get annoyed about. They were going for the “wouldn’t it be funny if these two wrestled” idea here and I’ve seen worse versions.

Greatest Clusterf***

So this is basically a Royal Rumble, but only in the very loosest of terms. There are no set time intervals and I don’t believe there is a set number of entrants. I’m not going to be able to keep track of all of the eliminations, as I’ve never seen a version of this where they are all announced. This is going to be about total chaos and some surprise entrants and nothing more. You can be eliminated by pinfall, submission, over the top, leaving the building and…death?

Joey Janela is in at #1 and Buff Bagwell is in at #2 for your first surprise. Granted Buff is on a crutch but he has the American Males theme so this could be a lot worse. Janela wants to strut with him but it’s a superkick to get rid of Buff very quickly. George Gatton, with an unidentified title, is in at #3 and it’s a superkick into a piledriver to get rid of him too. Judas Judd Cassidy (I think?) is in at #4 and gets thrown over the top just as fast.

Yoya is in at #5 and suplexes Janela but gets caught in a heck of a package piledriver for the pin. Billie Starkz is in at #6 and a Gory Bomb takes Janela down but he raises knees to block her Swanton. That’s it for Starkz and it’s Juicy Finau (a big guy) in at #7. Janela can’t suplex him so Finau does it to Janela instead and it’s the even larger Sam Stackhouse, in Bam Bam Bigelow inspired gear, in at #8.

That leaves Janela to get crushed in the corner by back to back splashes but Stackhouse misses an ugly moonsault. Janela tosses both of them and it’s Rhett Titus in at #9 as Janela keeps up his Brock Lesnar-esque run. Titus wrestles him down and hits the running boot in the corner until it’s the Invisible Man in at #10.

So we have the Invisible Man, Janela and Titus with Titus and the Man slugging it out. The Man gets the better of both of them but an elbow to the face lets Janela and Titus beat him down. A double suplex lets the two of them pose but Man is back with a double low blow. The Man throws out Titus but gets stomped down until Dante Leon is in at #11. They waste no time in the next entrant with Ninja Mack in at #12.

Leon and Mack are long time rivals so they pose at each other before superkicking Janela down. A shooting star piledriver drops Mack and it’s a sick looking Jimmy Lloyd in at #13. Janela and Lloyd put on masks and they rehash their Social Distancing match, meaning they punch from a safe distance. Mack isn’t having that and kicks Lloyd down, setting up the running flip dive to drop Janela on the floor. Back in and Lloyd runs Mack over for the pin and Early Morning Guy Steele is in at #14.

Steele doesn’t seem to know what he is doing and falls off the top as Janela and Lloyd watch from the middle of the ring. Then Steele gives them a running double Blockbuster and a Canadian Destroyer each. Then he goes up top for a 450 to Lloyd, only to get rolled up for the pin from Janela. That was a weird one and it’s Blake Christian in at #15. House is cleaned but the Invisible Man hits Christian low. That earns him a dropkick and it’s Kevin Blackwood in at #16.

Blackwood’s suplex gets two on Leon and stomps on Janela in the corner until Hoodfoot is in at #17. Hoodfoot and Blackwood slug it out until Slade is in at #18. Young Dumb And Broke (Charlie Tiger and Ellis Taylor) are in at #19 and #20, giving us Janela, Invisible Man, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Hoodfoot, Slade, Tiger and Taylor as this is far more organized than I was expecting. Everyone hits everyone until Deranged is in at #21 to clean house. With that going nowhere, Grim Reefer is in at #22 and has a smoke.

We now pause for everyone to partake, including Janela, who says he isn’t with AEW anymore and can do what he wants. Janela runs to the back (I don’t think he’s been eliminated but who can tell around here?) and Sandra Moone is in at #23. Reefer clotheslines her down and it’s Parrow in at #24. House is cleaned with Deranged and Reefer being eliminated almost immediately.

Big F’N Vin is in at #25 as Janela is having some Cheetos. Vin kicks Parrow out without much trouble as Janela wants to know his next spot. Nate Webb is in at #26 and comes through the crowd, who sings his theme music. Lloyd gets dropped by the Invisible Man, who hammers on Webb in the corner. Janela superkicks the Invisible Man though and tosses him out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Webb misses a charge and gets low bridged to the floor and Hoodfoot is tossed as well.

Shazza McKenzie is in at #27 and goes after Janela to start the beating. Janela gets in a shot to the face though and grabs a door, only to have McKenzie spear him through it. Janai Kai is in at #28 and Jazzy Yang (Jimmy Wang’s daughter) follows her at #29. The four women in the match stare each other down and it’s Edith Surreal in at #30. That gives us Janela, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Tiger, Ellis, Moone, Vin, McKenzie, Kai, Yang and Surreal, assuming I didn’t miss any random eliminations.

Dark Sheik, another woman, is in at #31 and we have a six woman showdown. Uh make that seven as LuFisto is in at #32. Some of the guys come in to go after the women, with Leon and Taylor being tossed out. The women all beat up Tiger and toss him out with Vin joining him. Then the women get into it, with Kai kicking out LuFisto. Moone is out as well and McKenzie hits a Stunner on Kai for the elimination. Janela comes back in to superkick McKenzie for the pin and it’s Maven of all people in at #33.

Everyone stops to look at him so Maven hits a bunch of dropkicks….and then walks out for an elimination. Fans: “THANK YOU MAVEN!” With everyone else pairing off, Sean Ross Sapp, yes the dirt sheet writer, is in at #34, drawing a WE WANT MELTZER chant. Sapp gets a mic and begs people to subscribe to Fightful Select so they can read about GCW wrestlers getting fired by AEW. Josh Barnett, former UFC Heavyweight Champion, is in at #35 but fellow writer Denise Salcedo (not in the match) comes in to low blow Sapp and toss him out.

Nasty Leroy is in at #36 and Barnett blasts him with a clothesline as Jimmy Wang Yang is in at #37. Yang manages to take him down (not the prettiest but it worked) so Jazzy (remember, Yang’s daughter) comes in to grab the leg, which apparently counts as a submission to get rid of Barnett. Jazzy rolls up Lloyd for an elimination and it’s Alec Price in at #38. Price tosses Yang and dances a bit before getting kicked in the face by Jazzy. That’s enough for Price to toss her as well and it’s Cole Radrick in at #39.

Radrick and Price wind up on the apron and it’s a double elimination. Brandon Kirk is in at #40, giving us Janela, Christian, Blackwood, Slade, Surreal, Sheik, Leroy and Kirk (I think at least). Sheik hits Kirk low as we’re told Slade has left the building. Janela runs the ropes a lot until Lord Adrean (a Wal-Mart Guy) is in at #41. Adrean cleans house and Tombstones Kirk for the elimination, only to get Death Valley Drivered by Janela for another elimination. Kevin Matthews (you might remember him as KM in Impact) is in at #42 and stares it down with Leroy.

A not great looking Rock Bottom plants Matthews and a worse Rock Bottom sets up a leglock for the tap as Janela busts a gut laughing. Then Janela hits Leroy low and pins him and it’s Nick Wayne in at #43 for a brawl on the apron with Janela. Wayne superkicks Janela out for one heck of a pop and here is B-Boy to introduce Team LA Fights, which are six unnamed people. The team (Jai Vidal and Jack Cartwheel are two of them) clean house and something like a Styles Clash into a sitout powerbomb gets rid of Blackwood.

With those six in at #44-49, the Second City Crew (AJ Gray/Mance Warner/Matthew Justice/1 Called Manders and Levi Everett) are in #50-#54. The Crew cleans house with Matt Vandagriff (of LA Fights) being tossed. Damian Drake and Ju Dizz (I think) are both out with Hunter Freeman joining them. Cartwheel gets knocked out but walks on his hands until Manders chairs him down for the elimination. Vidal is tossed out and the Crew is left alone until the others still in the match come in.

Christian and Wayne get together to toss Everett and Manders. Somehow Christian and Wayne are the last two with Christian hitting a quick Downward Spiral for the pin…and never mind as yeah there are some people still left. Sheik comes in off the top with a spinwheel kick and the rest of the Crew pile onto her for the pin. Christian goes after the Crew but gets taken down and superplexed into a top rope legdrop for the pin….and that’s it at 1:23:57 (I guess Surreal was tossed somewhere in there).

Rating: C+. To be clear, this match is not about something coherent or anything more than having one name after another. That being said, this was WAY more coherent than the previous edition and that helped a lot. This felt more like a very indy Royal Rumble and, save for Surreal, no one was getting lost in the whole thing. I had a good time with this and it did fly by with some fun moments. It’s the kind of match that I was expecting from a Spring Break and it went well, especially with all of the insanity that came with it.

Overall Rating: B-. This was more like the Spring Breaks of the past and it worked out pretty well all things considered. It was a collection of some fun matches before we got to the big main event and that wound up working well. Good stuff here and it didn’t feel like a regular GCW show. While those can be fun, it’s not what I came into this wanting. The main event is all that mattered here and the other four matches were a nice bonus so we’ll call this a success.

 

 

 

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Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night One
Date: March 31, 2022
Location: Fair Park, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Kevin Gill, Lenny Leonard

This is probably the crown jewel of the indy shows over Wrestlemania Weekend, just because of how insane it can get. Janela’s shows have a tendency to be completely nuts with some incredibly fun stuff and surprises. I’m actually looking forward to this one just for the atmosphere so let’s get to it.

Tag Team Titles: Second Gear Crew vs. Briscoes vs. Nick Gage

Gage is defending on his own as his partner, Matt Tremont, couldn’t make the show. Like him or not, Gage continues to be over like free beer in a frat house. It’s a big brawl to start and the doors are already brought in. The Briscoes bring in some chairs as well but Warner chokeslams Jay through a door for two. Mark is back up and Swantons Warner, sitting in a chair, down for a big crash.

Gage grabs the broken door and drops a twisting Vader Bomb onto Warner before stopping for the MDK chants. A piece of the table is used to carve up Warner’s head….and here is Slade to throw Gage a pizza cutter. Apparently Slade is Gage’s partner and he’ll carve up Warner’s head as well. Then Slade cuts himself because these people are not normal. Jay is back up to clean house, including Redneck Boogie to Slade.

Justice comes in with some chair shots and let’s bridge a door over some open chairs. Gage is up with some chair shots and now it’s time for a staple gun. Warner’s tongue is stapled to the door (good grief) but a piledriver through the door rips it free. Back in and Jay hits a Jay Driller into a Froggy Bow to give Mark two, with Slade making the save. Slade tries to fight off the Briscoes but it’s a Doomsday Device to give Jay the pin and the titles at 11:15.

Rating: C+. The nutty violence aside (hopefully far aside), this was an energetic match with the Briscoes adding some credibility to the whole thing. As much as I can’t stand Gage, he is the biggest star in the world to this audience and starting the show with him is a smart thing to do. Let him go out there and pop the crowd like no one else in GCW and get the show off to a hot start, especially if he is going to lose the titles with an out.

Post match the Briscoes celebrate before leaving Gage to get a hero’s applause.

Allie Katch is sitting in a room with candles around. Tonight she is facing Mickie James, who isn’t her dream match, but rather her fantasy. We get the infamous Mickie finger lick from the Trish Stratus match as this took a sharp turn.

Jeff Jarrett gets in his car, thinks he sees someone behind him, gets out to check, finds nothing, and gets back in.

AR Fox vs. Blake Christian

This should be fun and Fox’s wife Ayla is here with him. The fans are behind Christian as he flips out of a headscissors to start. Fox kicks him away and we get a staredown into a handshake. A dropkick sends Christian into the corner for a running clothesline but Christian picks the pace right back up. Christian’s dropkick into a nipup but Fox sends him outside for a heck of a running dive.

Fox gets a running charge for a boot to the face in the chairs but Christian drops him with a hard shot of his own. Back in and Christian hits a low superkick but can’t get a Border City Stretch. Instead Fox bails to the floor, allowing Christian to take him down with a dive of his own. Fox is fine enough to hit a twisting suplex for two and it’s time to slug it out.

Both of them try a cutter at the same time and we get a double breather. It’s Fox up with a rolling cutter into a rolling cutter for two but Christian hits Three Amigos, because Eddie Guerrero. A frog splash, also because Eddie Guerrero, gives Christian two but Fox is back up with Lo Mein Pain (middle rope Spanish Fly, which I’m guessing is somehow connected to Eddie Guerrero is well). Fox hits a 450 for two but Christian grabs a Spanish Fly into a wind up double arm DDT (that’s different, and called the Golden Trident) for the pin at 12:37.

Rating: B-. Yeah this was a fun one as Fox is about as much of a guaranteed good match as you’ll find on the indies. He’s just smooth in the ring and works well with anyone so this couldn’t have gone much better. Christian has been popping up more and more lately and you can see the talent in him. He’ll need something to make him stand out more but so far so pretty good.

Mickie James vs. Allie Katch

Effy is here with Katch. They fight over a lockup to start as we talk about what James has done so far this year. Katch takes her down but James flips up and we have a standoff. Mickie grabs a snapmare to set up a running kick to the chest but Katch is right back for the chop exchange.

The hurricanrana out of the corner is countered with a (rather enthusiastic) Katch powerbomb for two so Mickie kicks her low. Katch is fine enough to kick her down in the corner for a Cannonball and let’s bring in a door. Instead of, you know, using it, Katch knees her in the face to knock Mickie silly.

That means it’s time to load up two chairs and a door over them but Mickie flapjacks her through it instead. The top rope Thesz press gives Mickie two but the MickieDT is broken up. With neither going anywhere, they trade crotch grabs until a headbutt drops Mickie for two more. Back up and Mickie kisses Katch, kicks her in the face, and grabs the MickieDT for the pin at 11:18.

Rating: C+. Katch is someone who shows her potential every time she’s in there and it’s good for her to work with a legend like James, who can make her that much better. The match was pretty good as well, with the two of them hitting each other rather hard, though the violence was out of place. They also went a bit too far with the callbacks to Mickie vs. Trish Stratus, but the good parts were good enough to carry this far enough.

Post match Katch gets on the fans for booing James, because there is no Katch without James. Oh and that was the first ever women’s match at Spring Break. How is that possible?

Ninja Mack vs. Alec Price vs. Gringo Loco vs. Jack Cartwheel vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Jordan Oliver vs. Nick Wayne

One fall to a finish because we need a scramble match. They stare each other down to start and lock knuckles before going into the big series of kicks to the head. Everyone misses some kind of running splash and it’s another seven way staredown a minute in. The dives to the floor take some people down, setting up Loco’s big dive onto everyone else. Back in and Price hits an Alberto double stomp on Loco, followed by Cartwheel sweeping Lloyd’s legs.

Wayne tries to flip back in but gets sent ribs first into the corner by Lloyd. We settle down to Wayne vs. Oliver in a slugout until Oliver blocks a moonsault with raised knees. Cartwheel comes in to clear the ring but gets taken down by Mack for a twisting moonsault. Loco dives onto a bunch of people, leaving Cartwheel to knock Price outside as well. Cartwheel hits his own dive and Wayne is back in with a springboard Ace Cutter for the pin on Lloyd at 8:11.

Rating: C+. This was every scramble match you’ve seen in a long time, as there is little that anyone can do to make themselves stand out in a match like this one. There are seven people in a match that got just over eight minutes. Wayne is someone I’ve heard a good deal about for the last few months and I haven’t seen much of him. After this, I still haven’t as he barely got any time to shine with everyone else in there at the same time.

Joey Janela vs. X-Pac

This should be….something. X-Pac looks great and Janela is in Razor Ramon style gear, as a rather horrible way to get into X-Pac’s head. Janela knocks him into the corner to start and chops away but has to duck a spinning kick to the head. The Bronco Buster misses as well so Janela heads outside, where X-Pac hits a running seated senton off the apron.

Janela is fine enough to post X-Pac seems rather pleased with the fans hating him (makes you wonder why they bought tickets to JOEY JANELA’S Spring Break but oh well). The boos turn into dueling chants as Janela grabs a chair and pulls X-Pac back inside. X-Pac fights out of the chinlock and grabs a tornado DDT for a much needed breather. Now the spinning kick to the head connects and they head to the apron, where Janela is fine enough to grab a Death Valley Driver.

It’s time to set up a door over a pair of chairs but Janela takes too long, allowing X-Pac to come back with a slingshot flip dive to put him through the door instead. The X-Factor gets two back inside but Janela pulls him into a Crossface. With that broken up, Janela pulls in a bunch of other plunder, meaning it’s another door bridged over two chairs, because that worked so well earlier.

Janela takes WAY too long setting that up and going to the top, meaning it’s a super X-Factor through the door….for two as Janela gets a foot on the rope. Back up and Janela hits a super brainbuster for two and a double stomp through the door gets two more. Janela goes up again and gets shoved off the top and through another door at ringside. Back in and X-Pac chairs Janela down but a low blow and superkick lets Janela get the pin at 19:23.

Rating: C. This match just got on my nerves as X-Pac was doing his thing and trying to have a match while Janela was doing every stupid stunt that he could, none of which he bothered to sell. I know Janela is a big deal around here but you could see the difference in quality here and it was annoying seeing this be all about Janela. X-Pac might not be some all time legend (though he was very good), but he deserved better than this.

Post match X-Pac thanks the fans and puts over GCW, which he says is his family today. If you’re not down with X-Pac and GCW, he has two words for you.

GCW World Title: Jon Moxley vs. AJ Gray

Moxley is defending and Gray’s Extreme Title isn’t on the line. They start a bit slowly with Moxley taking him into the corner but getting shoved away. Gray takes the leg out and nails a spinwheel kick to the face to drop the champ (at least the one defending). A slugout goes to Gray and they head outside where Moxley suckers him in and takes the fight into the crowd.

You can’t actually see what they’re doing for a bit until Moxley gets into an open space and poses a bit before being knocked back to ringside by a bloody Gray. Moxley is fine enough to suplex Gray at ringside and it’s time for a barbed wire door. A release suplex drops Gray onto said barbed wire onto said door before Moxley stabs him with some barbed wire sheers. The barbed wire is used for a low blow and then wrapped around Gray’s face to make it worse.

A neckbreaker, with barbed wire, gives Moxley two and it’s off to an STF, complete with more barbed wire. Since that isn’t violent enough, Moxley puts the barbed wire door up in the corner and is speared (or kind of shoved) through it, due to wrestling rule #37. Gray hits a moonsault, mainly on Moxley’s face, for two and it’s ladder time, because of course it is. That’s not enough so here’s a door to go with it, with the ladder set at ringside and the door on some chairs close enough to it.

An STO on the apron rocks Moxley again and Gray elbows him off the ladder through the door. Back in and they get up to slug it out, because that kind of a spot is just there in a match like this. Gray blasts him with a lariat for two and it’s time for some….light tubes wrapped in barbed wire. That’s so stupid it even has Moxley backing up, only to come back with a jumping cutter onto the tubes for two. That and a piledriver get two, followed by a Death Rider onto more light tubes to retain the title at 22:18.

Rating: C. The match felt big, but every time they started to get something going, the violence got to be too much. The bigger thing here though was Moxley’s star power, which was more than enough to carry the match. Gray is someone who has impressed me just about every time I’ve seen him and he was good here, but as usual, the light tubes and doors were too much for it to be that great.

Post match they shake hands and respect is show.

Ultraviolent Title: John Wayne Murdoch vs. Alex Colon

Murdoch is challenging and Colon has beaten him a few times before. Colon has a bunch of belts around his waist and shoulders, most of which aren’t identified. Murdoch isn’t about to wait and hits him in the head with some light tubes during the Big Match Intros so we’re starting fast. Some whips send Colon into a variety of things in the corner and against the ropes before tossing him off the top, through a table covered with more light tubes.

Colon is already busted so Murdoch drives more glass into the head. Back in and Colon whips him through a door in the corner, followed by a running knee to drive light tubes into Murdoch’s chest. Then Colon stabs himself with broken tubes, which he then drives into Murdoch’s head. They headbutt it out on the floor before coming back inside, where Colon hits him with another light tube.

More light tubes do the same thing as the previous light tubes but Murdoch pops up and hits a piledriver. Colon pops back up and sends Murdoch outside, setting up a suicide dive with a light tube. Murdoch avoids a charge into the post and we pause as Colon might be seriously injured. Colon’s bloody arm is covered in a towel so Murdoch suplexes him onto more light tubes for two. A board to the arm sets up a cross armbreaker to give Murdoch the title at 13:48.

Rating: D. I can’t stand this kind of match as it’s the same stuff over and over. How many times are you supposed to hit someone with a light tube before it stops meaning anything? In this case it would be about two out of the thirty or so tubes they probably used before a dumb ending. What is there to say here? You had two guys hit each other with light tubes over and over until someone won. Rather downer of a main event and that’s never a good thing.

Post match Murdoch talks a lot of trash and tells Colon to get out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was actually pretty ok for the most part, save for a terrible main event. Swap in Moxley, who felt like a much bigger star, into that spot and the show is better, but still not great. Spring Break has always been one of the more fun shows over Wrestlemania weekend and that really wasn’t the case here. It’s not an awful show, but there is nothing memorable or overly fun here and that hurt things a lot. Mickie James and X-Pac are cool, but they aren’t enough to make the show feel all that important. Hopefully night two is better though, because this was the least memorable Spring Break show to date.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Ric Flair’s Last Match
Date: July 31, 2022
Location: Nashville Fairgrounds, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, David Crockett, Ian Riccaboni

We had to get here eventually and I’m not that happy about it. This is a show that I haven’t really wanted to watch since it was announced and that hasn’t changed since. While I absolutely respect what he did in the ring, I’m not the biggest Flair fan and seeing him do something this risky isn’t something I particularly needed to see. The good thing is that this is a full show and the undercard looks pretty awesome, but it’s all leading to one thing and that has me dreading the show. Let’s get to it.

This is billed as a Jim Crockett Promotions event for old times’ sake.

Pre-Show: Ren Narita vs. Yuya Uemura

They go with the grappling to start and get to a standoff as Crockett seemingly has no idea who either of them are. Tony doesn’t either, but at least he seems more interested. Narita gets the better of a chop off (Crockett: “They wish they could be Ric Flair.”) and kicks him in the back a few times, only to run into a dropkick.

A running clothesline in the corner sets up a running bulldog out of the corner before starting in on the arm. Something close to Antonio Inoki’s cobra twist has Narita in trouble but he comes back with a German suplex for two. Back up and they slug it out until Narita counters a charge into a belly to belly suplex with a bridge for the pin at 5:58.

Rating: C. This isn’t designed to be a great match or anything close to it but they were able to go out there and do their moves until one of them got the pin. That isn’t a bad thing and it works very well for a spot like this. Good enough match here as Narita and Uemura continue to showcase themselves well and grow in front of your eyes.

Bunkhouse Battle Royal

Sinn Bodhi, James Storm, Bully Ray, Mance Warner, 1 Called Manders, Gringo Loco, Kommander, Joey Janela, Kal Herro, Big Damo, Blake Christian, Crimson, Jordan Oliver, Rickey Shane Page, Wolfie D, Effy, Matthew Justice, Crowbar

It’s a brawl to start (of course) but after about a minute, here is Nick Gage to lead a GCW invasion, as he promised last night at a GCW show. Storm hits Herro with the Eye of the Storm and tosses him out and there goes Damo as well. Some double teaming takes Crimson out and Loco moonsaults out onto Damo to eliminate himself. Kommander runs the top rope and eliminates himself as well and Janela tosses Wolfie D.

Bodhi whips out a spare ring rope for some choking but gets kicked out. Effy crotches Crowbar on top and plays D-Von in an old What’s Up. The Ray tosses him, as well as Justice, Manders and Oliver in a roll. We’re down to Warner, Ray, Storm and Janela, with the latter two being knocked out. Ray drops Warner and loads up a table, with Warner being powerbombed through. Then Warner tosses him to win at 11:23.

Rating: D+. You’re only going to be able to get so much out of this as it was a pretty fast battle royal with an invasion angle going on in the middle. Warner winning is fine, and it was nice to see them go that route instead of the expected way with Storm or Ray. Not much to see here, but you know what you’re getting with a battle royal.

Warner wins a cowboy boot and belt buckle because of course he does.

Bob Caudle (92 years old on Tuesday) welcomes us to the show and sends us to ringside.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. American Wolves

Scott D’Amore is on commentary and Chris Sabin works on Davey Richards’ wrist to start. Richards spins out and kicks the arm for the break, only to get armdragged into the corner. Edwards comes in but Shelley tags himself in and slaps on a sleeper. The Guns start taking over in the corner with the alternating kicks but Richards comes back in for a cheap shot. Some alternating kicks put Shelley down and commentary starts making Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express comparisons.

Richards puts Shelley down and gets a running start to kick Sabin off the apron. The Wolves grab stereo submissions but Sabin Edwards away and into the other two for the double break. Richards dragon screw legwhips Shelley’s knee onto the ropes but misses a top rope double stomp. Shelley takes both Wolves down at once and the hot tag brings in Sabin to clean house.

The missile dropkick/Downward Spiral combination drops Richards for two but Edwards is back in with a superkick. Edwards’ backpack Stunner sets up the top rope double stomp with Sabin having to make a save. Sabin cutters Edwards and it’s the Dream Sequence for Richards. Skull and Crossbones finishes Edwards at 10:49.

Rating: B-. This was the kind of hot opening match you want to have and it worked well. These teams are going to have a solid match against each other through talent alone and that was on display here. The Guns are one of the best teams of their generation and the Wolves were good if you can handle Richards, making this a fast paced opener, as it was designed to be.

Video on some great moments of Jim Crockett Promotions.

Various wrestlers are here, including Vickie Guerrero, Santino Marella, Al Snow and Mick Foley.

Killer Kross vs. Davey Boy Smith Jr.

This is an MLW showcase. Scarlett Bordeaux is here with Kross, who has hair for a weird look. Smith drives him into the corner for a clean break to start so Kross takes it to the mat. The headscissors is escaped with a nip up and Smith cranks on the arm. The hammerlock goes on and we go to a wide shot for no apparent reason. They trade belly to back suplexes before a slugout goes to Smith. Back up and Kross pulls him into the Krossjacket but Smith flips back to escape. A t-bone suplex drops Bulldog again and it’s the Quickening (running forearm to the back of the head) to finish for Kross at 5:25.

Rating: C. They kept this one quick but the only thing that mattered was the belly to back suplexes. Smith is someone who should have all of the tools to be a top star but the lack of charisma hurts him a good bit. Then you have Kross, who feels like a killer (appropriately enough) and just isn’t that great in the ring. Mix those two together and you have something, but for now it’s two people missing something important.

More legends (Booker T., Shawn Michaels), plus Will Sasso, talk about what Ric Flair means.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Konosuke Takeshita vs. Alan Angels vs. Nick Wayne

The winner gets a future Progress World Title shot and I’ve never actually seen Wayne. He gets A LOT of praise though but I’ve never seen a match. Ian Riccaboni joins commentary to spruce things up a bit. Gresham seems a bit more enthusiastic here than he did at Death Before Dishonor. Angels and Gresham start things off but Gresham is sent outside and since lucha rules (because of course it is), Wayne comes in and sends Angels outside. Takeshita comes in with a running clothesline to put Wayne on the floor but it’s too early for the dive.

Gresham is back in to kick Takeshita down but Angels takes Takeshita’s place. Back in and Takeshita forearms Angels down before blasting him with a clothesline. Wayne grabs a Code Red for two on Angels but has to flip out of Takeshita’s German suplex. The Blue Thunder Bomb drops Wayne for two and everything breaks down. Angels and Wayne moonsault off the top and out to the floor for the big crash. Back in and Gresham drops Takeshita and Wayne, setting up the suicide dive to Angels. Gresham takes Angels back in and, after shrugging off the cradle attempt, tied Angels up for the rollup pin at 5:38.

Rating: C+. This was a fast paced match with so much crammed in that it felt like it could have been twice that long. Gresham is the most successful star here and him going on to the title match makes sense, though Wayne was looking smooth while he was in there. Takeshita was good as usual, with Angels continuing to be fast but small, which leaves him as just kind of a person.

Cody Rhodes sends in a video talking about how great he and his dad both think Flair is.

Rock N Roll Express vs. Brian Pillman Jr./Brock Anderson

That would be Ricky and Kerry Morton with Robert Gibson in their corner to counter Arn Anderson. Pillman and Brock have the 1990s Horsemen shirts to make things extra awesome. Nick Aldis joins commentary as the revolving door continues. I’m not sure if the bell rang but Pillman and Kerry start things off with Pillman taking him down without much trouble. They trade wristlock reversals until Kerry kicks him in the face to take over.

Pillman gets caught between the Mortons and pingponged back and forth with right hands. Brock comes in and wants Ricky, who kicks him into the corner and hammers away. It’s back to Kerry for the double dropkick but Brock takes Kerry into the corner for the tag off to Pillman. Kerry manages to send Brock into Pillman in the corner for a breather and the hot tag brings in Ricky. Everything breaks down and a Pillman cheap shot sends Ricky into a gordbuster to give Brock the pin at 7:39.

Rating: C. I get what they were going for here and the Express vs. Horsemen theme was a good idea, but Ricky and Kerry doesn’t have the same ring as Ricky and Robert. Pillman is someone else who seems to have a bunch of the tools but it hasn’t quite clicked yet. The match was another case where it wasn’t bad, but nothing I’ll remember in about five minutes.

JJ Dillon is here.

Bandido vs. Black Taurus vs. Laredo Kid vs. Rey Fenix

It’s a brawl to start with Taurus clearing the ring early on. Fenix and Kid are left alone with Kid shrugging off a chop and hitting a tornado DDT. A tiger driver plants Fenix but Kid misses a dive. Taurus comes back in and gets kicked in the face in the corner. Bandido is back in as well and gets caught with a rolling cutter from Fenix. Bandido sends Fenix outside and hits the one armed gorilla press on Kid.

There’s the running headscissors on Taurus but Kid knocks Bandido outside. Taurus dives onto everyone at ringside and then beats them up back inside as well. Bandido catches Taurus up top but he’s fine enough to super gorilla press Kid back down. Everyone is staggered and Taurus is sent outside, where Bandido nearly breaks his neck on a dive but manages to turn it into a Destroyer on the floor.

Bandido takes Kid up top for a super backflip fall away slam down onto Taurus and Fenix and everyone is down on the floor again. Back in and Taurus plants Bandido but Fenix makes the save with a top rope double stomp. Fenix’s Samoan driver finishes Taurus at 11:50.

Rating: B. When you put these four on the card, you do it so they can have a match like this. They had a very entertaining match with all kinds of high spots and fast paced action, which is all you would have needed here. It’s not about making sense or having any logic behind it, but rather about popping the crowd every chance they can. As usual, it worked.

Jim Ross wishes Flair well and thanks him for everything.

We recap Impact Wrestling World Champion Josh Alexander defending against Jacob Fatu. This is the match that got my attention more than anything else so this should be a heck of a fight.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Josh Alexander vs. Jacob Fatu

Alexander is defending and Fatu is part of the Anoa’i family with the nickname of the Samoan Werewolf. Tom Hannifan joins commentary this time around. Fatu charges at him to start and Alexander hammers away in the corner. Back up and Fatu uppercuts his way out of trouble, only to get elbowed in the face. Alexander starts cranking on the ankle but Fatu, who is built like Umaga, is back up with a running hurricanrana.

Fatu goes up but gets superplexed right back down. That doesn’t slow Fatu down, as he runs the corner and hits the Whisper In The Wind into a handspring moonsault, because he can do that. The running hip attack misses in the corner though and Alexander is back to the ankle. A powerbomb onto the knee gets two on Fatu, who is sent out to the apron.

Fatu’s slingshot is broken up and the running crossbody to the back puts him on the floor. Fatu is fine enough to run Alexander over and the top rope moonsault gets two back inside. Alexander manages to roll some German suplexes, only to walk into a pop up Samoan drop. Then Mark Sterling and the Major Players run in to jump them both for the DQ at 10:30.

Rating: B. Yeah this worked and the ending was about all they could have done. You don’t want one of the top stars of either promotion losing so doing the run-in is as logical as it gets. I could still go for Fatu to get a spot on a major roster at some point in the future because he is one of those freak athletes you do not find very often. Alexander continues to be one of the best stars going today and having him as the centerpiece of Impact is a great idea. Good match here and I expected nothing less.

Post match the beatdown is on but Diamond Dallas Page of all people runs in and Diamond Cutters Matt Cardona for the save.

An attempt at an interview with Jeff Jarrett finds his father Jerry Jarrett….and Jerry Lawler too. Lawler helped train Jeff so he’s ready to see Flair lose in his last match. Flair stole the strut from Jackie Fargo and ran out of Memphis the first time he faced Lawler, so it’s time to get rid of him for good. Lawler can still cut a fine enough heel promo.

Briscoes vs. Von Erichs

That would be Marshall and Ross Von Erich, Kevin’s sons. Ian Riccaboni is back on commentary as Mark takes Ross down to start. Marshall comes in to slam Mark but it’s off to Jay for a running clothesline. The Briscoes take over on Ross in the corner and the Von Erichs are sent outside for a big dive from Jay.

Back in and Jay hammers on Ross but a shot from Marshall puts the Briscoes in trouble for a change. That doesn’t last long as Jay gets over for the tag off to Mark and house is cleaned in a hurry. A shotgun dropkick sends Marshall into the corner as everything breaks down. Redneck Boogie is broken up and Marshall’s claw slam only gets two. Jay’s neckbreaker sets up the Froggy Bow to finish Marshall at 7:48.

Rating: C+. I haven’t seen the Von Erichs in a bit and they have gotten a bit better since then. It’s nice to see them looking more polished in the ring, which comes with experience. That being said, the Briscoes are one of the best teams of this generation and there is no shame in losing to a team that good. Nice enough match here, but the Von Erichs were overmatched.

Sting is grateful for Ric Flair.

We recap Jordynne Grace defending the Impact Knockouts Title against Rachael Ellering and Deonna Purrazzo. Not much of a story here but we need a women’s match on the show.

Impact Wrestling Knockouts Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Deonna Purrazzo vs. Rachael Ellering

Grace is defending. They trade the rapid fire rollups to start with no one being able to get anywhere. Purrazzo is sent outside so Grace and Ellering shake hands before starting up as well. Grace sends her into the corner and hits the running knees to the back, with Ellering seems to have hurt her ankle. Purrazzo is back up and sent right back to the floor, leaving Ellering to hit an STO into a middle rope spinning legdrop for two on Grace.

Back in and Purrazzo can’t get the Queen’s Gambit on Grace so Ellering comes in to beat on both of them. Grace spinebusters Ellering, who gets caught in a Fujiwara armbar from Purrazzo. With that being a problem, Grace grabs a choke on Purrazzo for the break. Back up and the Grace Driver plants Purrazzo and a rear naked choke makes Ellering tap to retain Grace’s title at 9:11.

Rating: C+. Another match that was fairly fast paced but without a ton of drama for the main event. Grace is a heck of a powerhouse and a good champion while Purrazzo has been the star of the division for a good chunk of the year. That left Ellering there to take the fall and it came at the end of a perfectly decent match.

We recap the main event, which is Ric Flair having his last match because he wanted to do it one more time. Then Jay Lethal no showed a podcast so Flair ripped into him, despite the two of them being friends. Jeff Jarrett wasn’t pleased so he and Lethal beat Flair down, drawing blood, because of course they did. Flair got Andrade El Idolo, his son-in-law, and the tag match is set. If this sounds not so great, it’s because it isn’t.

Undertaker and Michelle McCool are sitting next to Mick Foley.

Ric Flair/Andrade El Idolo vs. Jay Lethal/Jeff Jarrett

Karen Jarrett is here with Jeff and Jay. Jeff even shoves Conrad Thompson during his entrance so you know it’s serious. Flair, wearing the Big Gold Belt (looks to be the original too), uses the WWE version of his theme with the WOO to start. Kid Rock is at ringside (because of course he is) and Flair is wrestling in a sleeveless shirt, which is probably best for everyone at the moment. Flair and Jarrett start things off but it’s off to Lethal before anything big happens.

Lethal takes him down without much trouble and we’re at an early standoff. A headlock takeover takes Lethal over but he’s back up for an exchange of slaps in the corner. Lethal wants Andrade, who springboards in, making this a pretty run of the mill match instead of what we’re here to see. Some elbows to the face put Andrade in trouble but he’s fine enough to hiptoss Jarrett.

Flair comes in so Jarrett bails before hitting that strut. An Irish whip is blocked and Flair does his own strut, plus a crotch chop for fun. Flair chops away and kicks an interfering Lethal low, which is enough to send Jarrett up the aisle for a breather. Back in and Andrade gets in some kicks to Lethal’s ribs, allowing Flair to choke away in the corner. Some chops put Lethal down and Andrade comes back in, only to get taken down as well.

Now Jarrett can come in to stomp away, setting up another strut. Lethal’s Black Machismo (a name that has Crockett VERY confused) ax handle gets two on Andrade and the basement dropkick gets the same. Andrade counters a belly to back suplex from Jarrett but they bump heads for a double knockdown. The tag brings in Flair, who gets a Figure Four on Lethal but Jeff makes the save.

Karen slips in a high heel to bust Flair open, meaning Megan Flair (Ric’s daughter/Conrad’s wife) goes after her for the catfight over the barricade. Flair pokes Lethal in the eye to escape but gets taken back inside, where you can see him being VERY blown up. Lethal hits a suplex with Andrade having to make a save, leaving Lethal to hammer away even more. Hail To The King misses though and the tag brings in Andrade to clean house. A middle rope DDT gets two on Jarrett and Lethal superkicks Jarrett by mistake.

Andrade poisonranas Lethal and the ref is bumped, which is all this match needed. Flair tags in, despite laying on the apron at the time. Flair literally crawls over to Lethal for a cover but there’s no referee, so Jarrett brings in the guitar. That hits Lethal by mistake (duh) so Conrad throws Andrade some brass knuckles. Flair uses them on Jarrett and the Figure Four goes on. Cue another referee so Flair can pin the unconscious Jarrett (in the Figure Four) at 26:48.

Rating: D+. That’s about as generous as I can go as this was one of the hardest things I’ve sat through in a good while. Flair looked every bit of 73 years old out there and that was one of the worst possible outcomes. Seeing him laying on the apron and barely able to move was sad and the match was overbooked beyond belief in ways it didn’t need to be. If this is a ten minute match and they keep things as quick as they can go, it could have worked, but trying for some epic deal was a horrible idea.

The other problem is who was in there with him. I know there is a history/connection with most of them, but you would have go to pretty far down the list of Flair’s history to find Lethal and Jarrett. It comes off more like “here’s the best we can get to say yes” rather than someone special. The other problem is that needing them to be in the ring so long so Flair can recover left us with an only so interesting handicap match.

All in all, this is about what you had to expect: Flair talking up the match rather well and not being able to deliver in the ring. It was a passable match with the other guys in there, but this was all about Flair and at the end of the day, he wasn’t able to make it work. Cut this down to about 10-15 minutes and it could have worked, but it felt like Flair was dragged through this rather than going out on a happy note.

Post match Flair goes to ringside to thank some legends (Undertaker, Foley and Bret Hart, who are sitting together) before talking to Tony Schiavone. Flair talks about how he can’t believe how great this was and he’s in one of the best wrestling towns in the world. Then Kid Rock told him he was here to be entertained, just in case Flair didn’t have enough pressure on him. They’re hitting the town tonight, which isn’t quite how I was expecting such a speech to go.

Andrade hands Flair the Big Gold Belt and Flair hugs Lethal to end the show.

We get some credits, including a montage of Flair photos and Bob Caudle giving us the signoff (as he did back in the day).

Overall Rating: B-. This is a weird one as the main event is awful but that’s the only thing on the show that matters. I’ve heard this compared to a big boxing pay per view where no one watches anything but the last fight and that makes a lot of sense. The rest of the show was quite good and works as a heck of an indy show, but the main event didn’t work and dragged everything else down.

The other problem is the feeling of the show, as it might have been nice to have one more match, but it felt forced in a way. It’s like Flair decided it was time to praise him again and everyone had to line up with their nice things to say. The problem is they did that fourteen years ago on a bigger stage and after a better match. It didn’t feel fun or special, but rather “ok, he got what he wanted so let’s try to have a good time”. The Flair stuff was sad, and as good as the rest was, that’s all that mattered.

 

 

 

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