Night of Champions 2010
Date: September 19, 2010
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

Since this PPV is all about champions, take a guess as to what it’s about. That’s right: pancakes. I prefer them with just syrup but some people actually like butter. I’m not a butter fan so I never use it. Ok the show is starting now so I’m out of jokes. I could go for some Aunt Jemima though.

One thing I wonder: what are Paper Jams? Paper related music? A jelly substitute made from trees? Wow syrup and jam already. Hopefully no one lays an egg or we’ll have a decent breakfast.  Let’s get to it.

I apologize for that joke. Even I thought it sucked beyond belief.

IntercontinentalTitle: KofiKingstonvs. DolphZiggler

If Dolph is disqualified or counted out he loses the title. Vickie does her intro but we get to look at Kaitlyn in a good looking dress so I can live with that. The music helps too. We get the two hands behind the head here which I like as a taunt for some reason. They have him in a black bowtie now too which makes my head hurt. Red tights for Kofi tonight which is a good look for him.

Feeling out period to start which is weird since they’ve had so many matches. The ring skirt has all the titles around it which is a cool look. Kaitlyn helps to get Dolph up and is yelled at of course. NICE neckbreaker by Dolph and a chinlock follows it up. The champion has half black and half white boots on which is different for him. He uses a big boot. Well of course he does.

Dolph hits a Fameasser which gets a joke from Striker. King audibly groans at it too which is the sign of a bad one. When JERRY LAWLER thinks your joke sucks, you’ve got a big problem. Lawler: Vickie used to be boy crazy. Boys would have nothing to do with her and it drove her crazy. Vickie is in leather pants which gets a lot of commentary for some reason.

And now Cole and Striker argue about who designed Vickie’s shirt. This is either really boring in ring stuff or really bad commentary. Given who is doing what, I think I’ll bet on the latter. Kofi hits a counter to get us to even again and here’s the comeback. Nice standing dropkick and he hits a Thesz Press. Wow I haven’t seen one of those in YEARS. Boom Drop hits and sets for Trouble in Paradise.

He does the stupid clapping thing where everyone cheers for him. Sleeper is blocked as Dolph uses it for a counter. SOS gets two as Ziggler gets his foot on the ropes. We’re cranking it up again here as I think I know the finish that’s coming. I’ll let you know if I was right or not. We hit the floor and Kofi is dominating. He throws Ziggler back into the ring to break the count which Striker says is smart. Cole of all people points out the reality: it was stupid as he would win the title on a countout.

Sleeper out of NOWHERE (which remember must suck since it’s a transitional move or whatever. I love the IWC’s idiocy at times) and Kofi is in trouble. He gets up quickly which is at least believable. I can’t stand when someone is in a hold for like a minute and then gets out of it. Kofi gets one of his own on but Dolph reverses. Vickie goes to smack Kofi but Dolph screams at her not to. Trouble in Paradise misses and Zig Zag ends this mostly clean which is surprising. I was wrong with what popped into my head but not entirely, but I’ll spare you the details.

Rating: B. This would be standard fare on Smackdown which means it’s very solid. This was another good match between them and hopefully this ends their feud which has run its course I think. Solid here and Ziggler looked strong, dominating for the most part and countering on a mistake to win it. Solid stuff but PLEASE get rid of Vickie as he doesn’t need her anymore.

Miz does an ad for Paper Jams, which is a music thing or something.

Edge says he’ll win. Nothing at all special about this.

CMPunkvs. BigShow

Ok, Punk HAS to win this or his year is more or less a lost one. He’s called the Second City Saint here in his hometown which is a rare thing in this company. He gets the hometown reaction which Lawler is surprised by. That’s ironic as Lawler has made more of a career out of one town than anyone in history. Punk says he loves Chicago but he hates the inhabitants of it. Is he a self-hater I suppose?

He manages to get heel heat here in a smark stronghold. That’s saying a lot. Punk wants to burn the city down and rebuild it into a straightedge utopia. That’s a great line actually. Punk tops that by saying if he’s facing the Giant then he is David and his slingshot is the almighty straightedge. I already live such a lifestyle but I want to join him anyway. Punk with the headband is still weird looking.

Cole calls Show a knucklehead, and wouldn’t you know that’s the title of his upcoming film. Cole says a headbutt from Show is like taking a cinderblock and breaking it over the opponent’s head. WHY DOES HE KNOW WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE? Big chop sends Punk to the floor. PUNK USED A FREAKING BIG BOOT. He follows it up with a slingshot senton bomb over the top to the floor in a nice spot.

Punk has him down but one punch slows him down. Middle rope elbow gives Punk the advantage back. They’re pacing this differently which is working well. Punk kicks him in the head which is a nice touch. Striker asks Lawler who the biggest man he’s ever been in the ring with. Of course it’s Andre, and Cole says that no one beat Andre. I REALLY hope he said that as a generalization and not literally because who are they trying to kid otherwise?

Show more or less tackles Punk out of the air and punches him for the pin. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Show hit two moves: the tackle and the punch. That’s it. That was Show’s offense. Punk DOMINATED other than that but Show hits two move to end it. I hate this company some times. How in the world can you validate giving Show that win that way after Punk killed on the mic? It makes Punk’s offense look pathetic but hey who cares? Show is BIG so of course he gets to win. Freaking joke man.

Rating: F. This was idiotic. Yes Punk is my favorite wrestler, but sweet goodness man: someone please explain to me why in the holy mother of goodness THE BIG SHOW deserves to go over him like this or in any way that doesn’t involve Gallows jumping Punk. Punk has been GOLD on the mic lately and yet his only big win recently is over Christian when Alberto interfered. This is so freaking stupid it’s unreal.

Jericho says he’ll win everything. You know the line he throws in there.

We recap Bryan vs. Miz which should be good. I’ve heard great praise for their house show matches and after Monday I’m legitimately unsure who wins here.

USTitle: TheMizvs. DanielBryan

Miz in blue here which works for him in a weird way. Riley is here with Miz of course. We’re told that Shawn trained by HBK which I don’t remember hearing before. Very well may have been though. Somehow we talk about Lou Thesz and Cole says he Googled all of his info. Can we get some talk about breakfast again? It’s far more interesting than this bickering.

Miz with a nice bow and arrow hold as the announcers keep up their whining. We get an explanation for the name LaBelle Lock, which is named after an old wrestler from the 30s. Well that’s better than nothing. Miz works the arm as Striker says he thinks Bryan is attractive. We get a shoulderbreaker and Striker gives a shout out to Double A (Arn Anderson) and says he should be in the Hall of Fame. Say it with me: AMEN!

The champ throws out a big boot as we’ve literally seen it three times tonight. Bryan with a suicide dive through the ropes to take out Miz. He SELLS THE ARM and hits a dropkick off the top for two. They slug it out and the selling continues. Let the boo/yay chanting begin! Running dropkick in the corner which always amazes me when someone hits it for some reason.

Miz kicks out again and Bryan gets a bit frustrated. We head up top and Bryan gets crotched. SWEET clothesline takes down Bryan who lands on his arm for two. All Miz here as he CRANKS on the arm and makes Bryan scream. Ropes are grabbed but Miz has til five. If he yelled that the IWC would have rioted. The Finale (not typing that name out) is countered into a rollup for two.

Riley gets on the apron but Miz punches him by mistake. Rollup by Bryan gets two and I would have bet on that being the ending. Bryan to the floor and Riley rams the post by mistake. Bryan STILL holds the arm. Miz just goes off on Bryan with punches but gets pulled into the LaBelle Lock AND IT’S OVER! Miz cries at ringside in a funny moment.

Rating: B+. This WORKED. I was way into the ending here as Bryan came off as awesome, just like Miz. I can’t wait for the IWC to complain about how Bryan carried Miz here and I can’t wait for it. Miz more than held up his half out there and looked great (just to be clear, Bryan was great here too). This was a very solid match but was held back by Riley interfering. Miz losing this way is perfect and it definitely put Bryan over. Very solid match and I was most impressed.

Hell in a Cell is in TWO WEEKS. Wow that’s dumb.

Cena is still all smiley and happy here and does a math themed promo which makes sense.

Women’sTitles: MichelleMcCoolvs. Melina

Michelle in red: DANG. Nice shot of her as the bell rings. Layla is ticked at her for being in there as we hear about the history of the Women’s Title, which is of course mostly nonsense but whatever. Crowd is DEAD. Yes, a Chicago crowd is dead. Michelle sends her to the floor but no one sends her back in. NICE Blockbuster from Orton’s elevated DDT position by Michelle. I love the Blockbuster (jumping front flip neckbreaker) so that was sweet for me.

Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) is blocked and Melina takes over. Decent belly to belly suplex for two by the blonde. Kelly gets up on the apron marking the first time they do anything all night as Melina has her rolled up. Kelly is for Melina here but just doesn’t get it I guess. The girls all beat up Michelle and send her back in. They need to stop slapping the mat as I think it’s a referee count.

Melina does the Matrix Move but Michelle just kicks her. Again: kicking and punching people works best a lot of the time. Both girls hit the floor as the girls yell at Michelle, showing off their acting…..talent. Layla interferes and Michelle gets to hit a, wait for it, wait for it, BIG BOOT TO UNIFY THE BELTS.

Rating: C-. Surprisingly decent match here although the girls were absolutely pointless out there. Layla interfering is fine as it’s expected, but what about the heat between them allegedly? This wasn’t much but at least it gets rid of the stupid Divas Title, or at least I hope so. Better than most Divas matches though so I’ll give it that.

Barrett talks about the Winds of Change. I wonder if he’ll Rock You Like a Hurricane.

We hit probably the longest recap ever as we set up Kane vs. Taker. You know this one by now I’m sure and if not go read my SD reviews for the last 6 weeks or so. We get the full history here over the last 12 years, including the straight up lie that Taker took Kane’s mask away.

SmackdownWorldTitle: Kanevs. Undertaker

Surprisingly Taker comes out first. They slug it out in the aisle to start. I want to see if they can break the streak of awful that their matches have been in the past. Taker shoves him off the stage into a pillar that the set is made of. The no holds barred aspect helps here as these two are designed for a big fight rather than just a regular match. So far they’re following that idea as it’s just a major fight so far.

Taker gets sent into the steps and Kane kicks him in the head. Why must you tease me with more big boots? Kane grabs the belt and hits Taker in the ribs with it which is a shot you don’t see that often. Clothesline off the top doesn’t get a cover as Kane does a really bad looking legdrop. Cole says Kane has dissected Taker. I guess we’re ignoring the first 4 minutes of this match.

Seated running one footed dropkick (just get to the freaking big boot you freaking teases!) hits as Kane is dominating. He takes the cover off the table and just pelts Taker with it. This has been a bit better than I expected and MUCH better than their other stuff. Taker sends him into the steps and has signs of life. Or is it death with him? His character can be a bit confusing at times.

Apron legdrop by Taker and for once the word vintage is ok. We get a mini Taker Dive as he sails over the railing to take down Kane. We head into the crowd as they’ve been in the ring about two minutes out of maybe 10 this has gone. Kane hits kind of a big boot. He hits a jumping punch as we’re back at ringside now. He punches Taker down and Taker is in trouble.

It turns into a boxing match almost with Kane throwing nothing but punches. Taker is getting DOMINATED here and it’s kind of nice to see. As long as he doesn’t make the comeback and win that is. Taker gets one punch in to a BIG old pop. He starts winning but Kane gets a knee. Jumping clothesline puts Kane down though. And now Taker throws punches.

Snake eyes and a big boot get two. We’re 5-5 in big boots tonight. Chokeslam to Kane but Taker can’t cover him. Striker calls him the weigher of souls. Could he be more over the top when talking about the zombie? Kane counters the Tombstone into one of his own and Kane wins clean!

Rating: C+. It wasn’t a great match by any means but this did what it was supposed to do. I don’t think these two can have a great match, but this is what they were supposed to do: Kane went out there and beat Taker up and then pinned him clean. That’s how this was needing to go and Kane gets the clean victory. Pretty sure we’re heading to Hell in a Cell with these two which is the next logical step. Kane needed this though and he got it.

Taker can barely get back to the locker room and almost has to crawl the last bit. I’d love Paul Bearer to come out here.

Randy says he has nothing to say. This takes nearly two minutes.

Legendary is coming to DVD already. That’s AWESOME.

We’re having a tag team turmoil match??? Hokey smoke. Someone made a thread about this and I didn’t think it would happen but here we go. The idea is there are five teams with two random ones starting. They have a match and then the winners advance to face the next team. Last team standing wins. It’s kind of like the weird cousin of the gauntlet match.

TagTeamTurmoil

We open with Hart Dynasty vs. Usos. Yeah because we haven’t seen this enough. Striker mentions playing a game called Six Degrees of the Hart Dungeon, which sounds AWESOME to a wrestling geek like me. DAVID HITS A BIG BOOT IN THE CORNER! Kidd hits a big Asai moonsault to the floor. Kidd gets the Sharpshooter but the other Uso hits a BIG BOOT to end him, guaranteeing new champions.

Kozlov/Santino vs. Usos now. This lasts about a minute as Santino sets for the cobra but Tamina distracts him, allowing a Samoan Drop (shocking right?) to end him.

Bourne/Henry in next. This shows how sad the tag division is. It truly does. Henry comes in and cleans house with the World’s Strongest Slam. Air Bourne ends it.

Final team is Drew/Cody. Ok we HAVE to have the heels win it here for the sake of sanity. Also so we can hear either awesome theme song. Drew is in those sexy white tights too so I’m happy. The heels dominate for awhile as Bourne plays Ricky Morton for awhile. They say Cody was a tag team champion but never say with who. I don’t get why though.

Big gutbuster by Drew as Bourne is in trouble, hence the Morton thing I guess. Drew CRANKS on a chinlock which looks awesome. Bourne gets out of a suplex using the ultimate counter: kicking his feet. Hot tag to Henry and Cody trips coming through the ropes. They go for the Super Shooting Star which takes forever so Cross Roads takes out Bourne (illegal man) for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. These are hard to grade but given who was in this the booking more or less was terrible. No Gatecrashers or Dudebusters or Nexus but Bourne and Henry? Really? The one good thing here is that they beat the champions clean the other night. That’s a major plus for them so there’s no argument that they didn’t beat the champions. Not wild AT ALL on having another randon team thrown together but that’s the nature of the beast in modern tag wrestling I guess. Pretty bad though and definitely the worst of the night so far.

Random Alberto Del Rio promo montage.

Build up video for the elimination match and I think you get the idea of it.

Sheamus says his usual stuff.

RawWorldTitle: Sheamusvs. JohnCenavs. Edgevs. WadeBarrettvs. RandyOrtonvs. ChrisJericho

Pin or submission only for eliminations. MONSTER reaction for Edge. The trenchcoat is back too. Face pop for Jericho but not as big as Edge’s. Barrett is in his second PPV main event less than five months after making the main roster. Not bad. Elimination rules here. Orton is out last and gets a nice reaction but still pales in comparison to Edge. Striker asks Lawler for strategy here. Lawler says avoid elimination, which sounds really simplistic but Lawler follows it up by saying you’re going to have a better chance with three or four opponents than with five so if you can hang on your odds improve. Sometimes the simplest answer is best.

Tornado rules here too which is nice. We get a Hulk reference kind of as Cole lists off champions. Cena and Jericho stare each other down which makes me think Jericho is a jobber by comparison. RKO maybe 90 seconds in ends Jericho. WHAT THE HECK? He makes the big sad exit and everyone, myself included, is shocked. Y2J chant picks up of course as I’d love a face run from him.

Everyone surrounds Barrett and the beatdown is on! Orton and Cena have an eventual staredown but Barrett breaks it up. Striker calls Edge, Sheamus and Barrett rulebreakers. CENA THROWS A DROPKICK! The superpowers fight it out but Barrett saves Cena for some reason. Sheamus kicks Barrett in the face. He dominates for awhile and goes around kicking everyone in sight.

High knees to Cena which I can’t think of a Too Many Lies joke for. Cena blocks the High Cross as everyone else has apparently died. Edge comes back in and stops the top rope Fameasser. Double suplex off the top to take Cena down for two. Edge and Sheamus work together which tells me he eliminates the Irishman.

Orton pops up for like two seconds and Sheamus takes him down almost immediately. Spear misses and the Irish Curse takes Edge down. Brogue Kick misses but Edge gets the spear. Orton takes one too but Edge takes a very nice FU to get rid of him and we have four left. Barrett takes down Cena and stomps the tar out of him.

He and Cena fight it out for awhile until Cena makes his comeback. 5 Knuckle Shuffle but Sheamus accidentally hits Barrett. Cole keeps calling the FU the A.A. now. Sheamus is in the STF FOREVER and has one of the best teases of getting there I’ve ever seen. He manages to do it and you can feel the crowd just stop. Nexus comes out and the distraction allows Barrett to hit Wasteland on Cena and ELIMINATE HIM!

Nexus beats down Orton and since there are no disqualifications this is all gravy baby. Nexus tries to run in again but Cena KILLS one of them with a chair. Orton gets the backbreaker on Barrett and an RKO gets us down to Sheamus vs. Orton. Brogue Kick KILLS Orton but it only gets two and a big old pop. High Cross is countered and the RKO gives Orton his seventh title!

Rating: C+. This was ok. It wasn’t the mess I thought it would be and getting rid of two people relatively early, especially Jericho, made this run a lot more smoothly. It’s an ok match but really nothing worth going out of your way to see. They went with the usual multi-man formula here which I’m not a fan of at all. Barrett pinning Cena clean is a good thing but it’s probably going to lead to a Hell in a Cell match which I don’t think anyone wants to see at this point. Fairly good match, but not a great one at all.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was definitely ok but it’s not a great show. The title changes are usually pretty cool and some of these were, but I can’t really bring myself to care about Orton winning his 7th world title. You get some good stuff like Miz vs. Bryan and Kane vs. Taker, but other than that this show really isn’t anything special. It’s entertaining enough for three hours and if you watch it you won’t be bored, but you certainly won’t be blown away. Not a bad show but not really good either.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

 

Monday Nitro
Date: March 26, 2001
Location: Boardwalk Beach Resort, Panama City, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson

So in case you’re not getting the date or the significance, this is the final Nitro. Three days prior to this (or so) Vince bought WCW from Turner and the Monday Night War came to an end. In short, this is it. This is the end of WCW vs. WWF. Vince has won and everyone knows it now. As for the show, it’s being billed as Night of Champions, despite there being two title matches but whatever. This is an historic show and I remember being SHOCKED, so let’s get to it.

We open with Vince McMahon in the Raw interview area, talking about how he’s bought the company and its fate is in his hands. Tonight there will be a simulcast where he’ll explain things. This is bizarre.

Even their intro video sucked at this point.

Scott and Tony talk about how stunned they are about this.

And here’s Ric Flair. Oh this should be good. His hair being spiked is just wrong for some reason. He gives a very emotional speech, talking about how great his time in the company has been, which based on what I’ve read is nonsense, but he belongs out there on the final show and that’s all there is to it. Flair breaks kayfabs and says that Vince’s Dad voted for him to be world champion back in 1981. This is mainly about the holding the company in the palm of your hands thing. Flair makes one final request: if this is the last night, he wants Sting one more time.

WCW World Title/US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

This is title for title with Booker as US Champion. They slug it out in the middle and Booker hits a bit spinning heel kick to take over. This is outside mind you. We hear about how the US Champion is the #1 contender, which NEVER happened if you think about it, kind of making it a running joke. Midajah slaps Booker in the face.

Steiner swings a lead pipe at Booker but he hits the post instead in kind of a scary move. Scott moves onto a Bow and Arrow which doesn’t do much. A kind of botched dropkick and Booker starts his comeback. Ghetto Blaster (Axe kick) hits and we get a Spinarooni. Side Kick and it’s ALL Booker here. Book End is blocked for two. They’re FLYING through this. Book End is the counter to a powerbomb and it makes Booker the world champion again. Literally this didn’t break 6 minutes.

Rating: C-. Not terrible I guess considering they had to fly through this but there wasn’t much here. No one can beat Steiner in like 4 months and Booker does it in five minutes? They couldn’t give this a few more minutes? It was kind of a formality I guess but it just could have been done far better. Not awful though.

Vince blasts Panama City and WCW. Great to see that Vince spent millions of dollars on something that sucked.

3 Count vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Kaz Hayashi/Yun Yang

Winners get a Cruiserweight Tag Title shot later. Yang is more commonly known as Jimmy Wang Yang and a member of 3 Count is now Shannon Moore. Everybody does a bunch of flips and dives to the floor with no rhyme or reason to them. Yang sends Rey into the buckle and hits a huge corkscrew moonsault called Yang Time. This is under tornado rules apparently. BIG 450 from Evan Karagis but Kidman makes the save. For the finish, imagine Moore being in position for Orton’s DDT but turned face up. Rey hits a springboard legdrop on him there to end it. I didn’t skip anything in the description. It was really that fast.

Rating: C+. Entertaining match but at under four minutes how into it can you get? This was just to give the challengers a disadvantage against Skipper and Romeo later on. The spots were shaky but hey, it’s the last night of the company so who cares? Not bad but nothing we haven’t seen a million times before and better.

Trish brings Vince some champagne but they make out instead.

We recap the GREAT Chavo vs. Helms rivalry.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Shane Helms

Back in the dying days of WCW, one of the few things they NAILED was Chavo, who was absolutely awesome for about a year before the company closed. Shane has an intro with dancing girls a rap that he performs and lights. Shane was very popular as well mainly due to just doing awesome things in the ring. Nice belly to back by Chavo as the fans actually seem into this.

Tony tries to talk about how WCW has been about the youth. That’s just funny. Actually it isn’t, because having that not be the case is a big reason as to why the company died. High cross body from the top for the champion for two. T-Bone gets two. Ton of reversals into a Northern Lights Suplex for two. Very fast paced match here.

More reversals into the Sugar Smack (Superkick) and then the Vertebreaker is blocked. He can’t get out of the second one and it ends the match. That move is both awesome but also scary, which makes me understand why they wouldn’t let it be used in the WWF, as it was just too much of a liability.

Rating: B-. Again good match but at like four and a half minutes how into it can you get? Everything is in fast forward speed tonight and it’s kind of taking me out of the show. This is the polished up version of WCW since it’s not being treated like a serious company anymore but rather an All Star show, which helps it a lot I think. Nothing special here, but good enough.

Ad for Slim Jims with Randy Savage, who was out of WCW for about a year at this point if not more. Yeah his last match in WCW was in August of 99.

Remember the Titans is on VHS and DVD. That’s amusing.

Booker says he’s not done yet.

Tag Titles: Lance Storm/Mike Awesome vs. Chuck Palumbo/Sean O’Haire

The more famous guys are challenging. Team Canada won a non-title match last week to get this. See, why is logic like that so complicated? That’s a basic story and it gives perfect justification as to why we are where we are here. After a quick break, Vince is with Trish again and Cole interrupts them. He says a bunch of WCW related people are worried and Vince threatens to fire Cole. PLEASE DO IT VINCE!

Storm of course starts with technical stuff. Tony almost says World Tag Titles but has to shift to WCW Tag Titles. Slingshot splash by Awesome for two. Hot tag to O’Haire and he beats the crap out of Awesome, hitting his weird reverse Samoan Drop. I could watch Lance Storm throw superkicks all day. Palumbo hits his Jungle (super) kick and the Shawnton Bomb ends it.

Rating: C-. I always liked all four of these guys so I was a fan of this feud. The match of course was really short so it’s kind of hard to grade, but at the same time this was ok I guess. It put the champions over and didn’t give us a title change for the sake of a title change, so I can’t really complain about that at all. Decent match but again nothing great at all.

Recap of Bigelow vs. Stasiak. Stasiak has Stacy and is doing something close to what Dolph Ziggler is doing at the moment. If he loses he has to get a tattoo.

Shawn Stasiak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

They set this up last week so they have to throw it on here. Bigelow brings the tattoo kit with him. These two feuded for a few months and we were never told why they got so much time. I guess someone thought it was a good idea for some reason? Flying….something misses from Stasiak and Bigelow goes up for the headbutt. It hits but there’s Stacy to be hot. She interferes and a neckbreaker from Shawn ends it.

Rating: N/A. At least we got to look at Stacy.

Regal shows off his shirt to Vince. He tells Vince that it might be a bad idea to buy WCW. This was pointless.

We get a highlight reel of champions to play up the Night of Champions thing, which is always fun.

Vince says it’s just about that time.

Cruiserweight Tag Titles: Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Elix Skipper/Kid Romeo

This was the final of the tournament to give us the original champions, 8 days prior. The announcers continue to insist how much WCW loves young guys. Romeo never did anything at all but Skipper wound up in TNA. Kidman and Mysterio I think you know of. Hot tags to Rey and Skipper as it’s pretty clear that this is going to be another 3 minute or so match.

Scott points out that the champions were just thrown together. Bronco Buster to Elix (really Elix?) and it turns into a huge mess. Rey with a springboard falling headbutt for two but Skipper makes the save. More near falls follow and Kidman gets out of Skipper’s Play of the Day and hits the Kid Crusher (Killswitch) for the final title reign in the history of the belts.

Rating: B-. Another 4 minute yet still entertaining match. I remember when the titles were announced that more or less no one wanted to see them but when did that stop WCW? This wasn’t anything special at all but it was pretty solid I guess. Skipper and Romeo were just thrown together and told they were the best team. The belts lasted 8 days so it’s not like they meant anything.

Sting cuts a very energetic promo about fighting Flair one more time.

Vince is walking down a hall.

Ric Flair vs. Sting

Something just feels right about saying that. Flair is in a t-shirt here, which is fine with me as if nothing else it makes him look decent. He looks skinny here. The announcers point out that Sting never jumped but Flair did. Not exactly but hey who cares about history right? They recap Flair vs. Sting which is always fun. Hudson tries to talk about how Flair vs. Sting went against Mania 4. What Hudson isn’t mentioning is how badly WCW got slaughtered as Mania 4 outdrew Mania 3.

Tony talks about how we’ve seen this match thousands of times. I was thinking more like 15 but whatever. There’s the press slam from Sting which never gets old. And there’s the Flair Flop which brings a smile to my face. This is more or less Sting vs. Flair’s Greatest Hits as they’re just doing their basic spots. Dropkick misses and it’s time for the leg. Figure Four goes on and Sting is in trouble!

Could he submit? Will he give up? For the first time ever will Sting tap out to Flair? If you don’t know the answers to those questions, just leave now as I can’t help you. Basic comeback occurs and there’s the Scorpion for the tap out. They hug as they should do to end this.

Rating: C+. Like I said this was just the short version of their match as they had no angle or time here, but this wasn’t supposed to be a major match. It was a feel good moment which is what it was supposed to be. Fine for what it was, which is the best description that I can give it.

I’m going to cut the review here, because at this point the simulcast begins and since I’m going to do the Raw from this night next I’ll just review it in there since it’ll be literally the same stuff.

Overall Rating: C+. Well the idea of the night of champions thing was good but the breakneck pace of the show made it rather annoying as there was just too much going on at once. It’s ok I guess but it’s not much more than that. It says a lot that one of their best shows in years had no context or angles worth anything to speak of. This was an ok show, which obviously should be seen for historical purposes. Decent show for what it was, but more important or history than anything on the card itself.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

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Date: September 16, 2012
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Sin Cara vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

The short DDT gets two on Rey but Cara comes back with some high flying stuff to send Miz to the floor, followed by a big dive. Rey hits a headscissors on Cody on the floor followed by a seated senton off the apron. Cara gets two on the champ off a slingshot senton but he gets sent into the corner for the corner clothesline from Miz. Rey comes in with a kind of Vader Bomb for two (why has that move become so popular lately?) but Cody jumps him from behind for two of his own.

We recap the Anger Management story with I believe the same video that aired on Friday. Basically Kane and Bryan both have anger issues and have been sent to anger management, resulting in some wacky outcomes and a tag title shot tonight.

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Kane/Daniel Bryan

Rating: B-. This was different but the fans ate it up with a spoon. There was absolutely no other option for this match as Kane and Bryan are currently over like free beer in a frat house. The pop for the win is bigger than probably all of the reactions for a tag title match in the last five years combined, so at least people are paying attention now.

Cole and JBL talk about breast cancer and how WWE is partnering with a cancer research foundation which is why the middle rope is pink. Nothing wrong with that at all.

US Title: Zack Ryder vs. Antonio Cesaro

Ryder won the preshow battle royal to get this shot. The word of the night is Unfair, which is what Cesaro thinks this match is. Cesaro takes him down with ease to start but Ryder takes Cesaro down by the wrist to counter. A flapjack and dropkick get two for Ryder but Cesaro shrugs them off and hooks a chinlock. A clothesline gets two for Cesaro as does the gutwrench suplex.

Cesaro gets the same off a regular suplex and the fans cheer for Ryder. They slug it out but Cesaro throws him into the air and hits the European uppercut for two. Cesaro hooks a reverse neckbreaker but pulls Ryder onto his back for a submission hold. Ryder escapes and hits a discus lariat for no cover.

A rollup gets two for Ryder as does a middle rope dropkick. Ryder hits a neckbreaker for two and Cesaro rolls to the apron. He goes up but Ryder brings him down with a hurricanrana. Ryder loads up the Broski Boot but Aksana pulls him to the floor. Back in and a European Uppercut sets up the Neutralizer to retain the title at 6:40.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton

Ziggler drops a bunch of elbows capped off by the jumping elbow for two. Off to a chinlock with the headstand by Ziggler but this time he bridges forward to crank on the neck even more. Back up and another dropkick gets two for Ziggler. Dolph goes up but gets crotched and superplexed down for two. They slug it out and Ziggler holds his own. He runs into an elbow but takes Orton down with the Fameasser for two.

They head to the floor with Orton taking over. He hits the Elevated DDT off the barricade but Orton throws Ziggler back in instead of taking the countout. That only gets two back inside and Orton loads up the RKO but gets countered into the sleeper. Orton throws him off his back, throws Ziggler into the air and pulls him into the RKO for the pin at 18:15.

We get a sneak preview of Dredd 3D.

Divas Title: Layla vs. Eve Torres

Now we get a video about breast cancer.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

Video on the National Guard which has some members here tonight.

Heyman is in the ring and praises Punk, saying that Punk has described himself as a Paul Heyman Guy.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk tries a Rock Bottom for two. Cena hits an AA out of nowhere for two. Cena puts him on the middle rope and tries a belly to back superplex but Punk knocks him off. John runs right back up and hits a middle rope German for the pin and the title at 26:54. Both of their shoulders were down and I think you know where this is going.

Punk clocks Cena with the belt.

Overall Rating: A-. This was an excellent show with nothing bad on it at all. The worst match was probably the Divas and that was pretty much fine. Most importantly of all though: they treated the belts like something that mattered tonight and it made a noticeable difference. JBL on commentary was great and Bryan/Kane are still great. You had two really good matches and a bunch of other solid ones. Very good show here and probably their best PPV since Wrestlemania.

Results

The Miz b. Sin Cara, Rey Mysterio and Cody Rhodes – Miz pinned Rhodes after a Skull Crushing Finale

Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth – Kane pinned Kingston after a top rope splash

Antonio Cesaro b. Zack Ryder – Neutralizer

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Eve Torres b. Layla – Spinning Neckbreaker

Sheamus b. Alberto Del Rio – Brogue Kick

John Cena vs. CM Punk went to a draw

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Night Of Champions 2011
Date: September 18, 2011
Location: First Niagara Center, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Jerry Lawler

This show is an interesting one as you don’t really need much in terms of backstory for a lot of the matches. Most of them are there because we need title matches. However, the Raw title match is one of the least interesting feuds and title matches I’ve seen in a very long time. I just don’t care about why this match is taking place and there’s not much heat built up between the two guys. The main event is likely Punk vs. HHH with the Game’s job on the line. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about champions. Oh and HHH and Punk who aren’t champions but are going to be in the main event tonight.

I love those banners with the titles hanging from the ceiling by the entrance. They’re cool looking.

Tag Titles: Air Boom vs. Awesome Truth

Works for an opener. There’s some new referee and Kofi vs. Miz starts us off. Miz tries to be all aggressive but that’s not his thing at all. A big forearm puts him down and it’s off to Bourne. The champs are moving fast tonight. Off to Truth and everything breaks down. The champs hit stereo dives off the top to pop the crowd. That’s why you have high flying tag champions.

Back inside and it’s Bourne vs. Truth which didn’t go well for Mailbox Man on Friday. It’s time for Bourne to play face in peril and he does it well, getting double teamed by Miz and then getting taken down almost immediately after Miz breaks up a tag. Miz hammers away a bit but Bourne gets in a kick to the head after breaking a way too early Finale attempt.

Hot tag to Kofi who doesn’t resemble Robert Gibson but he cleans house anyway. Boom Drop is broken up by Truth but he gets sent to the floor quickly. SOS gets two on Miz. I’d like to see that move be brought back more often. Miz grabs a short DDT for two and there’s no referee because of Truth. Bourne makes a fake tag and tries Air Bourne but Miz moves. The idea is the referee is an idiot. DDT gets two on Bourne and there’s a blind tag by the challengers but THIS doesn’t count. Finale hits Bourne but Truth has the referee again. Miz is so ticked off that he shoves the referee and we’re done at 10:00.

Rating: C+. Fun match as they were all moving out there. I like the actual proof of the conspiracy and it might come back later on. Also it’s good to not give them the titles just yet as the champions need a bit more resume building stuff as they haven’t really beaten anyone yet other than the former Nexus team who got beat by Ryder and Lawler a few weeks ago. Fun opener.

Miz and Truth yell about the Conspiracy post match and down goes the referee.

Miz and Truth yell at Striker about the Conspiracy and threats against HHH are made. End of show shenanigans?

Intercontinental Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Ted DiBiase

This was set up quickly on Smackdown or maybe after it so it’s not like this means much. DiBiase shoves him to the corner and that gets him nowhere. A pair of kicks, one of the drop variety, gets a pair of two counts. After being slapped, DiBiase tries to channel his inner Austin with a Thesz Press and right hands but that just isn’t him. Back up and Ted is back down with the Beautiful Disaster.

Rhodes takes over with his basic strike stuff, working on the ribs and the face. Camel clutch goes to an abdominal stretch on the mat as I guess he’s working on the ribs, despite having a neckbreaker style finsiher. We get a test of strength of all things which doesn’t go to anyone in particular. Another dropkick by DiBiase misses and it’s back to the abs which doesn’t work as well this time.

A third version of it is back on the mat as Rhodes really likes DiBiase’s abs I guess. After a few more seconds it’s a spinebuster by DiBiase to plant Rhodes. There’s not much to say as the feud here is kind of vague and not really developed at all. The Beautiful Disaster Part 2 The Return/Revenge/other cliched sequel titles is countered by another dropkick (can DiBiase do anything else?) and they go to the corner. Rhodes uses the mask headbutt but is pulled back down and unmasked. He swings it at Cody but is caught in a rollup with tights for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C. Not bad here but this should have been on Smackdown rather than a PPV. There’s no real reason to see these two fight but they’re trying at the same time I guess. DiBiase has nothing to do here and Rhodes is REALLY needing an opponent as the midcard face pool is pretty weak. Bryan is too big for it and that’s about it. Not good but it means he’ll have the title for awhile.

Here’s Christian to want ONE MORE MATCH and he wants it after Henry vs. Orton tonight. He makes fun of Buffalo for never winning a major sports title (heat as old as time) and then asks the fans to chant one more match. They actually do but here’s Sheamus. Christian is a weasel and here’s some more Irish jibber jabber. Sheamus says if Christian gets one more match, Sheamus wants the first shot. The fans chant one more match and Christian’s head winds up in the front row via a Brogue Kick. Simple but effective as usual.

US Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison vs. Alex Riley vs. Jack Swagger

No tagging here thank goodness. They pair off but it’s down to Riley vs. Swagger quickly. Riley gets a Rock Bottom for two. It’s one of those matches where some people stay in the ring and others chill on the floor. Riley is knocked off the apron and may be injured. It’s Morrison vs. Swagger in the ring at the moment and scratch Morrison from that list. Now we get the potential Team Vickie showdown which Vickie is MAD about.

Swagger sends him to the floor and Riley isn’t hurt I guess as he comes back in and hits a TKO for two. Vickie breaks up the pin and Ziggler yells at her for it. Morrison hits that same kick that Cody uses for two. Fameasser gets two on Morrison. This is hard to keep track of. They’re sticking around with Morrison vs. Ziggler for awhile and Johnny is trying something to Dolph who is sitting on the top. Here’s your WHAT WAS THAT spot from Morrison.

He gets caught in the Tree of Woe with Ziggler sitting on the top. Riley goes up to try something on Dolph but Morrison does a power situp and Germans him off the top. Swagger comes in with a suplex and everyone is in now. Morrison hits the standing C4 for two on Riley. He loads up the Starship but Riley moves.

Swagger grabs the ankle lock on Riley but Ziggler has Morrison in the sleeper. Both holds are broken and Riley hits the inverted DDT on Swagger for a VERY close two. Jack grabs Riley’s ankle again and Riley takes a low blow. Morrison comes in but walks into the gutwrench powerbomb and Ziggler steals the pin to retain the title at 8:30.

Rating: B-. I liked this one as the false finishes were great. It’s pretty clear they’re setting up for the Swagger vs. Ziggler feud over whose double G’s are harder to pronounce. This was fine though and a good way to push Ziggler stronger as a heel who is stealing the title. I liked it and I’m not usually a fan of multi-man matches.

Henry says he has 15 years of hatred built up. I think he means cholesterol built up but whatever. He wants Josh to come out and interview him when he wins the title.

Vickie is happy and says she’s seen her future. Everyone wants to work for her and her talent has been recognized and things are about to happen. She wants to be the new COO if HHH loses.

Hell in a Cell is in two weeks. Give me a break.

Another Henry video which we’ve seen a dozen versions of over the last few weeks.

Smackdown World Title: Mark Henry vs. Randy Orton

After some big match intros we’re ready to go. According to Booker the WCW Title and the WHC have the same lineage. Orton fires away at him and manages to get him down, setting up the Orton Stomp. The knee drop ticks Henry off but he jumps to the left (Time Warp?) and sends Henry to the floor where he’s all ticked off. Back in HENRY GOES GYMNAST with a big boot to the head. That was impressive.

Orton grabs a sleeper which wouldn’t be a bad idea IF EVERYONE DIDN’T USE IT ON BIG MEN. Naturally it doesn’t work here either and Orton is put on the top rope. Henry clocks him upside the head and Henry takes over on the floor. With Orton’s body wrapped around the post, Henry pulls back to injure the back and to draw a Gumby reference. I didn’t expect one of those but Cole played the Gumby card.

Henry stands on Orton’s back with no rope support. FREAKING OW MAN!!! The big splash only gets two and then another two off a not very serious cover. Henry is toying with him here but Orton gets up for a second. He’s not up for two seconds as Henry takes him down and chokes a bit. Orton hammers away with his two kinds of strikes. Henry takes him down but the second splash misses and here comes Randy.

Orton fires off a bunch of punches in the corner and Henry is in trouble. The clotheslines don’t work and Henry isn’t sure what to do. There’s a dropkick and Henry heads to the apron. He puts himself in elevated DDT position but Henry fires back with a headbutt. This has been good so far. There’s the World’s Strongest Slam for two and Henry is ticked off. Henry sets for a Vader Bomb but Orton moves.

He goes after the knee and hits a DDT to take Henry down. It’s RKO time but Henry rolls to the apron. This time the DDT works and I think the tides just shifted. It’s only two though because that’s not his finisher and Henry grabs the rope instead. Henry pulls a Bret Hart and plays possum so he can get a shot to the leg in and Orton is slowed down. Now he’s looking at him like a plate of shrimp puffs. Orton gets up and pulls himself up with Henry’s singlet and tries an RKO. That gets countered and the RKO makes Henry the champion at 13:11. It had to happen someday.

Rating: B. I can’t believe it but I’m ok with this. They built this guy up over the summer and then gave him the title. It’s about time as he was pushed for years on and off and just never got there. This is the right time though and we need some fresh heel blood on Smackdown. Good moment here and something that Henry deserves, which I can’t believe I’m saying but it’s true.

Henry says he’s never going to lose the title.

Del Rio isn’t happy with Johnny Ace about having to team with Ricardo on Monday but Ace says that it was HHH’s move. He wants more respect (Alberto) and Ace says he’ll get it. Team Mexico leaves and here’s Punk. Ace wishes him good luck and Punk turns that around, implying Ace means good luck in your future endeavors.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

The fans are totally behind Beth and the power is too much for Kelly to start us off. The fans say she sucks, and I’m sure she does. Kelly gets in a few shots but the power is still too much for her. There’s not much to say here as it’s almost all dominance. Kelly gets in a bulldog to break things up and is booed out of the building. Eve and Nattie get into it outside and Kelly is beaten down again.

Kelly grabs a small package (isn’t that how she got this job?) for two but the K2 is blocked and Beth takes her head off with a clothesline. Kelly is put on the top rope and gets killed by a superplex. Both chicks are down though as you would expect. That only gets two for Beth and it’s Glam Slam time. In the EXACT same finish from Summerslam, Kelly rolls through for the pin at 6:47. Give me a break.

Rating: C-. The superplex was awesome but the ending being EXACTLY the same thing as Summerslam makes it look pretty freaking stupid. Kelly getting booed out of the building on the pin is funny stuff and it’s definitely a good sign, even though it’s the hometown pop more than anything else. Not a good match but for the Divas it’s not all that bad.

We get a really good video package on the history of the WWE Title and all the champions (ok not all) over the years. Cool stuff.

Raw World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena

Del Rio isn’t in his car and is in blue tights. Cena has the car, appearing to be a Ferrari, much to Del Rio’s dismay. Alberto wants Ricardo to do his Big Match Intro as he wants the accent right. Cena does his own intro, adding in a bunch of nicknames like the Fighting Fruity Pebble and rubbing in that Del Rio thinks he’s better than everyone. Slow feeling out process to start without much happening for the first few minutes.

Ricardo trips Cena and is tossed out like an illegal Mexican alien. Del Rio gets a kick in to the ribs and works on the back. This is a rather boring match so far but maybe they’re going for the slow build. Del Rio works on the back with various offense and works on the back even more. The first almost eight minutes of this have been pretty basic but they’re going for a slow build…I think.

Cena gets in a shot to break up the momentum and is greeted with a You Can’t Wrestle chant. Double clothesline puts both guys down. Del Rio kicks away and puts Cena on the floor with a right hand. Johnny fires back for a bit but can’t get over Del Rio’s offense. Cena finally takes him down and starts up his ending sequence with the shoulders and You Can’t See Me but the AA doesn’t work that fast of course.

Del Rio counters with a backstabber of all things for two. The cross armbreaker is broken up and Cena gets a dropkick for two. Cena loads up the top rope legdrop but Alberto hits the running enziguri for two. This is getting better. Cena gets a boot up in the corner and tries the STF but can’t hook it. Tilt-a-whirl gets two for Del Rio. He puts Cena on the top rope and pulls him into the Tree of Woe. Alberto tries a spear but Cena sits up to send Del Rio’s shoulder into the post with a SICK crunch.

Now the top rope legdrop hits for two. Alberto gets out of the AA again and the Mexican hits a German on the American for two. Del Rio goes up and hits a senton backsplash for two and there’s the armbreaker but it’s not on full. Cena rolls over and pulls him up into a powerbomb sort of move for two. While we’re watching the replay Cena hits an AA and here’s Ricardo. Cena hooks the STF and I don’t think the knee bends that way. Alberto taps to give Cena title #948 at 18:37.

Rating: B. Well it got better as it went to say the least but Cena just wins the title again? It’s just kind of there and makes Alberto look weak, which he already did during the title reign. I mean, points for staying in the STF for that long but why did they change the title that fast? Oh, because we need a HIAC match for the title next month and Alberto wouldn’t be much in there. Good to see the calendar screwing over the booking again.

Cole’s voice is wearing out.

Now we recap the non-title match which is the main event of a show about titles. So there’s a huge ordeal about the text that someone might have sent and Nash wants Punk but Nash is fired and sent himself the text and it doesn’t make sense but I’m sure we’re supposed to keep watching or whatever. This takes awhile and if you don’t know it, go read my Raw recaps.

HHH vs. CM Punk

Punk has a shirt with a WWE Ice Cream Bar on it. I could really go for one of those. This is no DQ/no holds barred. Punk jumps him on the floor and the brawl starts out there. They go over to the table and the announcers aren’t sure if they’re on or not. Ok into the ring now and the banana trunk wearing Punk fires off some kicks, countered by good old right hands.

Pedigree is countered and HHH sends Punk to the floor. This has been mostly HHH but it’s definitely not domination. Cole is saying about one line a minute as his voice is gone. Back on the floor now with HHH sending the knee (not the side of the leg, the kneecap) into the post. Punk fires back, bouncing off the railing and hitting a knee to the head of HHH up against the post.

HHH is like PUNK YOU and throws him through the barricade out into the crowd. He’s all fired up and yelling about Stephanie. This brutality is working better than I thought it would. They fight deeper into the fans and Punk grabs a trashcan to throw at the Game’s head. They’re up by the stage now and HHH sends him chest first into the set. They go onto the stage but HHH can’t hook the Pedigree.

Punk throws him off the stage and dives down to drill him. This isn’t falls count anywhere I don’t think. Punk rams the head of the COO into the set and is in control. They’re back at the ring now and Punk pulls out a trashcan. He drops that and shifts to a chair instead, popping the Game in the back a few times for two. HHH grabs a spinebuster and sends Punk into the chair that Punk wedged between the top and middle ropes.

HHH clips Punk and then puts the legs around the post. He grabs the chair from earlier and slams it into the knee into the post. He’s cerebral here so taking out the knees takes away the kicks and the GTS. Punk channels the power of Chicago and sends him into the steps. This has been a solid brawl so far. HHH grabs a monitor but Punk kicks him with the good leg. I’ve never gotten how that works. Wouldn’t he want to stand on the good leg?

In the big spot of the match, HHH is put on the table and Punk drops the Macho elbow through the Game and the Dudleyville special, killing both guys. They both crawl back to the ring and we get a cool replay from the crowd so you only see Punk flying and not the impact on HHH. Lawler: “That was Savage.”

Both guys get back in the ring and Miz/Truth come out to beat down both guys. SWEET! We’re actually getting some stuff from earlier in the show playing through to the end! They lay out both guys and put Punk’s arm on HHH but it only gets two. It’s No DQ so this is fine. Awesome Truth calls Conspiracy on the count and takes down that annoying referee Scott Armstrong. Get out of the ring and take your hitched count with you!

Here’s Johnny Ace who waves down someone but Punk is back up. He takes down Truth (sending him to the floor and right onto Armstrong) but walks into a Pedigree…with no referee. Ace tries to get a referee in but the guy is out. A second referee is here checking on Armstrong but HHH walks into the GTS. Now the referee is back in (thanks to Ace) but Truth breaks up the pin. GTS to Truth as this is getting awesome. Scratch that, it’s been awesome (truthfully).

Punk tries his springboard clothesline but jumps into a Pedigree….FOR TWO. I would have bet on that being the finish. And of course here’s Nash through the crowd. Good thing the camera was waiting on him to come in. He takes out both guys but is beating on the Game more than on Punk. He sets for the Jackknife but Punk saves HHH. Now he (Punk) takes the Jackknife but Nash drills HHH on the floor. He loads up the announce table but HHH is up with a sledgehammer to take Nash out. Back in now and ANOTHER Pedigree finally ends this at 24:09.

Rating: B+. This was one of those matches that was so insane but for the most part it made sense. Miz and Truth coming in is a great thing and I don’t think anyone really thought Punk was going to win at the end of the day. I liked it and the kickout of the Pedigree shocked me. The whole thing was a fun brawl on top of that and the ending wasn’t exactly what I was expecting (the buildup to it, not the ending itself) and it was great all around. Very good stuff.

Overall Rating: B+. Pretty entertaining show overall with the big match being great and a nice surprise in Henry winning (what am I saying???) plus good stuff with Alberto vs. Cena, odd booking aside. The Conspiracy is a nice touch and the whole thing worked pretty well I though. I had fun with this show and I wasn’t really looking forward to it otherwise. Good stuff here and a fun PPV.

Results
Air Boom b. Awesome Truth via DQ when Miz shoved the refereeing
Cody Rhodes b. Ted DiBiase – Rollup
Dolph Ziggler b. John Morrison, Alex Riley and Jack Swagger – Pinned Morrison after a powerbomb from Swagger
Mark Henry b. Randy Orton – World’s Strongest Slam
Kelly Kelly b. Beth Phoenix – Victory Roll
John Cena b. Alberto Del Rio – STF
HHH b. CM Punk – Pedigree

Night of Champions 2009
Date: July 26, 2009
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,774
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

So what we have here is Night of Champions where everything on the roster is for a title. Literally, every match is a title match. I think I like that actually. Sure it’s a gimmick show, but at the same time that’s all you need at times. We’ve got a Mania 24 rematch and Punk vs. Hardy for the respective titles. This has been recently dubbed the 5th big one of the year, so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about as basic as you could imagine as almost everything is about being a champion. Why mess with something that simple? It focuses on the two main matches as you would also expect. Norcal was at this show so expect a few lines about him here and there.

Unified Tag Titles: Legacy vs. Chris Jericho/???

So Edge snapped his ankle and has no partner, meaning anyone that’s paid attention for the past few months knows who this is going to be. We get the video of Edge’s injury saying he’ll come back and take care of Jericho. That’s going to be an awesome feud. And it’s the Big Show. No one got this and the rumor was they picked him seconds before with the video being shown to buy them some more time.

There are cool banners with pictures of the belts hanging from them. It looks sweet. Rhodes and Show start us off. Show just beats the heck out of both guys as you would expect. You could bet on Jerishow retaining here even from the perspective of watching it live. In a nice move, Legacy hits a tandem chop block and clothesline. Not bad at all. Rhodes whispers something into the ear of Jericho but he does it just subtly enough that unless you knew to look for it you wouldn’t notice it. Well done.

Rhodes busts out a nice moonsault to Jericho. He’s underrated in the ring as his offense keeps changing up. The problem with this match becomes apparent quickly: Jericho and Show are the default faces even though they’re supposed to be the heels. We hit insane mode and Show puts down both guys and after a Codebreaker, the Colossal Clutch ends it.

Rating: C+. It was fine. That’s the only thing I can think of to say for this one. It was designed to be a pure squash for the new champions to get them over and that’s exactly what it did. Rather boring match but it served its purpose very well.

We go to the back to CM Punk, and it’s promo time. This is the promo that made CM Punk to a lot of people and I remember wanting to jump up and cheer at it. He talks about how the parents letting their children support Jeff Hardy and his drug addicted lifestyle and how eventually they start doing as Jeff does: smoking, drinking, drugs etc., and it all started because the parents wouldn’t take responsibility for their kids. The fans cheering for everything that he lists off is great as this was the perfect crowd to do this in front of.

ECW Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Christian

Dreamer in ECW wearing the ECW Title is perfect to say the least. And WWE can’t have that, so they have him come out second and have the king of the smarks Christian come out second so that he gets a much bigger pop than Dreamer who has earned 30 seconds of glory. As you know, Christian wins here, which is also ridiculous as it wouldn’t have killed them to do this at TV.

Seriously, let Dreamer have his moment in ECW in Philly. Striker points out that the ECW Title has changed hands a lot in Philly. Thanks for that. I never would have guessed on that one. I love that running rolling flip that Dreamer does. You can see there’s a fairly big lack of psychology here as they’re just kind of walking through spots with little flow to it at all. We hit a sleeper already which isn’t a good sign.

More or less Dreamer is using nothing but jobber offense and signature spots. To be fair though you could argue that those are one in the same. Dreamer hooks a Texas Cloverleaf of all things. We hit an always fun pinfall reversal sequence. They trade finishing holds that are countered until Christian hits the Killswitch for the pin and the championship.

Rating: D+. While I hate Dreamer losing the belt in Philly, he got about two months with it so I can’t argue much on that. Christian has held the belt since this match. That being said, this just wasn’t that good. Dreamer simply isn’t that good in the ring but if nothing else this was just a nostalgic reign for Dreamer so that’s all well and good.

Ad for Summerslam.

Jerishow say they’re going to dominate. Cookie cutter promo if there has ever been one.

US Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Carlito vs. The Miz vs. Primo vs. MVP

Swagger does a little dance on the way to the ring. More or less it was a given that someone was going to take the title from Kofi here. I think Carlito’s mustache has its own population. Miz gets a NICE pop. Primo is replacing Big Show who was supposed to be in here. And there are no tags here. That rarely makes things any better or easier to call at all. Hey, did you know Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title?

I didn’t know if it was made clear that Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title. I want to make it clear that Kofi doesn’t have to be pinned to lose his title. It’s just a massive mess as everyone is trying to get a spot in there where they can. Also there are a lot of guys randomly staying on the floor for long periods of time. They mess up a save spot as Swagger hits Primo for the save about 5 seconds after Miz kicked out.

The Puerto Ricans are exploding here as they don’t like each other even though no one cares at all. Swagger and MVP are having the same angle that MVP and Miz are having now. No one is in the ring at the moment. Kofi’s movement is amazing to say the least and there’s the incredibly named Boom Drop. They do a Tower of Doom spot with Miz taking the most damage.

The crowd is dead here in case you were wondering. Miz is unceremoniously dumped to the floor. Is there a ceremonious way to do that? Everyone gets a quick rollup or pin and it gets some applause if nothing else. In a cool and actual believable spot, Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale at the same time on MVP as he hits the Playmaker on Swagger. Kofi hits Trouble In Paradise on Carlito for the pin and the very surprising retain.

Rating: C-. I hate matches like these, I truly do. They’re just disasters to have one guy get a fluke pin and overcome a bunch of odds when in reality all it does is disguise the fact that there is no story or effort being put in here and it’s just a massive mess. Kofi winning was a nice surprise though.

Randy Orton says he’ll prove himself tonight. He reminds me of Lex Luthor from Smallville.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Michelle McCool vs. Melina

This is a rematch from The Bash which was brought on by some bad acting. Michelle’s bra is sticking WAY out here. Melina gyrates like no one I’ve ever seen. Michelle is the first person to use her freaking brain and kicks Melina on her splits intro. And there’s your first botch as they mess up an arm drag. We get some kicks that don’t actually connect as I have a bad feeling about this match.

We hit the floor and are told that a slam of the face into the barricade is a DDT. Riiiiiiiight. Melina is laying on the apron and in a coole counter she pulls up onto the bottom rope to avoid a baseball slide. They’re hitting hard but at the same time, they’re botching the heck out of so many things. Michelle reverses a rollup into a rollup for the pin. At least it was short.

Rating: D. They were trying but this was just a mess and a half. They were botching stuff left and right with there being little flow or psychology at all. Michelle has gotten better which to be fair she couldn’t have gotten much worse. This was really bad.

What in the heck is the point of McCool’s song? You’re not enough for me? That makes no sense.

Cena is here.

There was a tournament where the winner got Orton at NOC. More or less it was a way to have HHH vs. Cena on free TV and I won’t even go into how stupid that is. Legacy ran in for the double DQ so they made it a triple threat, which had been done before but no one cared. The video was as simple as you could ask for.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. HHH vs. Randy Orton

Cena of course gets a mixed reaction. HHH gets a very face reaction and of course Orton gets a very heel reaction. Vince must already be coming over just the entrances. We’re at 5 minutes for intros and Orton hasn’t come out yet. This could be an all night thing. And now we sit and wait on Orton. I guess Vince wanted a show. They say this was a great Wrestlemania main event.

Not only was it not a main event, but it was far from great. Orton doesn’t have to be pinned or tap out to lose the title. The ridiculousness of triple threats is never lost on me. Big match intros mean that it’s been 13 and a half minutes since the last match ended and the beginning of this. Good to see they’re keeping this thing moving. The faces double up on Orton to keep things moving quickly I guess.

Orton of course winds up in trouble as you would expect. The other thing I hate about these are how formula based they are. Why does one guy always wind up down on the floor only to show up just in time to make a save? I don’t get it at all. Cena does that top rope leg drop to both guys and it more or less completely misses. Philly really doesn’t like Cena at all.

Orton gets put to the floor with another completely ridiculous spot and it’s HHH and Cena again. Hmm I believe I called this coming no? It’s boo/yay time as they oversell punches to no end. Why would anyone duck their head against HHH? How stupid do you really have to be? Cena takes the Pedigree and in a STUNNING, yes STUNNING I say, turn of events, Orton makes the last second save. We’re in the crowd now. Oh never mind only Orton is.

The STFU is on HHH on the table, making it completely pointless. Cena gets the STFU on HHH again but in the ring this time. There’s zero drama at all here as it’s clear the match won’t end here. Cena dodges the punt (even though the kicking motion is more like a place kick) and rolls up Orton for two. That could have been a believable ending actually. Somehow Orton makes the Garvin Stomp more boring. How in the world is that possible?

And now the fans are chanting for Orton. It’s a very interesting sign that Orton is so hated that the fans would rather have Cena as champion again. HHH hooks a Sharpshooter because he’s HHH and can do whatever he wants to I guess. Cena adds a Crossface at the same time and Orton taps.

Let the nonsense begin. Legacy runs in for the beatdown as I wonder why Rhodes can’t wear sleeves. And Orton hits the RKO on Cena for the pin to retain. Yep, after tapping like that he keeps the belt. That’s not stupid at all.

Rating: D+. I hated this. Even Cole has disgust in his voice and I can’t blame him. No one wanted to watch Orton other than Vince so he can stare at his glistening body. Even Philly was cheering for Cena. What does that tell you? This was idiotic to say the least and the match sucked on top of that. Actually let me revise that. The match was ok, but the formula was idiotic. Cena and Orton began their ridiculous feud the next month at Summerslam.

Maryse is stretching for obvious reasons. That and her mustache must equal talent right? Miz hits on her and it fails.

Shaq is guest host tomorrow.

Chilli from TLC is here. No one cares.

Raw Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Maryse

Make it quick please. Yeah as looks go, Mickie is way ahead of Maryse. The fans want puppies. And people wonder why this division is never taken seriously. The match is your standard slapfest of course. Maryse tries to use her perfume or whatever but gets stopped.

We’re in our second rest hold six minutes into the match. This just isn’t interesting at all. Cole almost says the name of the wrong title. There is simply no need to have two belts. If you had just one it could potentially work. Mickie hits her jumping DDT to get the title to next to no reaction.

Rating: D. People don’t care about women’s wrestling and that’s really all there is to it. It’s not nice but it’s true. This just wasn’t interesting at all. The buildup was Mickie has beaten the jobbers this month so she gets the title shot because she’s on a roll. That’s it. I’m looking forward to Michelle vs. Mickie as there’s an actual story to it. This didn’t and it was painfully obvious.

Legacy says they’re cementing their legacy.

We recap Mysterio vs. Ziggler which more or less is Ziggler has been winning a lot but doesn’t get the belt. This is his chance.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

People kept talking about the potential that Dolph had but I’ve just never seen it. These fans seem to think that everything is boring and it’s getting on my nerves very quickly. This is seemingly going to be a rather long match with Ziggler getting to show off. That’s a good sign if nothing else. He’s showing some solid offense and he looks completely calm doing it. Also getting in some little plays to the crowd which is always a nice perk.

This was what the title needed: big names defending it and guys having longer solid matches for it. For years it was the wrestlers’ title and that’s what they tried to make it again which I would say was a success. As expected, Dolph dominates for most of the match but makes one minor mistake, in this case going for one too many moves and here comes the masked man. And then of course the 619 and the springboard splash ends it.

Rating: B. This was very fine indeed. They got to beat on each other for awhile and it did a few things. First of all it let Ziggler look good. He got to show off against a huge star in Mysterio. Second they had a great match that made the belt look good. Both guys came out of this looking great and that’s all you can ask for.

Ad for the tag team DVD which I’m about halfway though and need to finish up.

We recap Punk vs. Hardy, which started at Extreme Rules where Punk used the MITB case to get the belt then slowly turned heel. That led us here.

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

They really push the whole lifestyle thing here which is the smartest thing that they can do. They’re starting with a fast paced match that’s working rather well. These two had some great matches over the year and this was certainly one of them. Punk is so perfect as a heel and it’s working like a charm here. They’re going with high spots here which is something that Punk can do very well.

This wasn’t going to get a lot of time as it started at about 10:40, so the max was about 20 minutes. Oy it’s that referee with the hitch in his counts. This match felt like it didn’t have a beginning and we’re already at the end which isn’t good really, although the match is fine. We get a Dragon Sleeper of all things. Punk goes into that striking sequence he uses and Hardy ducks before hitting an RKO which is called a Twist of Fate here. Yeah that was dumb.

GTS hits and if the referee wasn’t incompetent, Punk would have won. Punk tries to leave and our hero doesn’t like that. In a rather anti-climactic moment he hits his usual finishing pair of moves and he gets his third world title. The celebration ends the show.

Rating: B-. I do not agree with the booking here at all. I was skeptical about the grade here but Ross saying let the Hardy Party begin sealed it. I don’t get Punk losing at all after the promo from earlier, but that’s life I guess as we can’t send kids home sad or they might only get three t-shirts this year instead of four. Either way this was pretty good although like I said it felt rushed which is because the show was running a bit low on time. I get why they cut it short. Still good though.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a pretty good show but not great. I really didn’t like the triple threat but I’d chalk that one up to a personal bias more than anything else. Other than that, the non-Diva matches were more or less all good which is all you can ask for. There’s nothing that jumps off the page as awesome, but at times you don’t need there to be. This was good enough for a watch but it’s not something you’ll want to see again. Check it out if you’re bored.