Smackdown
Date: October 31, 2014
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tom Phillips

We’re onto a new set of new stories for a change now with a focus on Cena vs. the Authority and Ambrose vs. Wyatt. That isn’t the best pair of stories in the world but we’re stuck with this until we get to the Rumble and the wrestling actually matters to the company anymore. It’s also Halloween so hopefully things aren’t all that campy tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with….Vince. He tells us about the big news from the conference call: November is a free month of the WWE Network (for new subscribers), meaning Survivor Series is a free show. That’s quite the incentive and the lack of a commitment should help them in the long run.

Battle Royal

Paige (Summer Rae), Natalya (Queen of Hearts), Naomi (paratrooper), Summer Rae (schoolgirl nerd), Layla (clown), Emma (Tarzan), Rosa Mendes (zombie nurse), Cameron (cop), Alicia Fox (firewoman), Nikki Bella (cat)

They’re in costumes of course and the winner gets a Divas Title shot so AJ is on commentary. We get a video from earlier today of Brie dressed as Daniel Bryan but Nikki sending her to get her Louis Vaton bag in San Antonio. Naomi quickly kicks Rosa out to the floor and Natalya kicks out Summer (AJ: “There goes the sexy D-Von Dudley.”).

Emma gets tossed as well as Layla pulls the stuffing out Paige’s top. That earns her an elimination before Cameron and Naomi go out one after another. We’re down to Natalya, Paige, Nikki and Fox but Alicia quickly kicks Natalya out. Fox dumps Paige but eliminates herself in the process, giving Nikki the win at 2:43.

Here are Kane, Rollins and the Stooges for a chat. Kane loves this time of year because he gets to torment little kids but the fun keeps going into November with Survivor Series. Tonight though it’s Ambrose vs. Cesaro in a Trick or Street Fight but Rollins thinks Bray Wyatt might interrupt. If that happens though, Dean will fall just like he did on Sunday inside the Cell. Rollins laughs at the YOU SOLD OUT chants before taking the focus back to Survivor Series. Who could Cena possibly get on his team? Who would be willing to team with him against the Authority and risk their careers in the process? Kane can think of one man so get out here Dolph Ziggler.

Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title again. Ziggler dropkicks the knee but the DDT is countered with Kane just throwing Dolph down. A clothesline gets two for Kane but Dolph avoids an elbow drop. Back up and Kane uppercuts Dolph off the top and out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kane missing a big boot and taking a Fameasser for two. Jamie Noble gets on the apron for a distraction though, allowing the big boot to connects for another two count. The chokeslam is countered into a sunset flip just like Monday but Kane pops up. Ziggler’s Stinger Splash is caught in the chokeslam for the pin at 8:27.

Rating: D+. Kane. Beat Dolph Ziggler. Clean. In 2014. I’m sure this has nothing to do with Ziggler saying legends can’t just come in and get handed big matches at Wrestlemania earlier this week. If that’s true, and given the company’s track record it wouldn’t be all that shocking, WWE needs to get over itself already.

Post match Kane hits another chokeslam and makes Ziggler vs. Rollins.

Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Curb Stomp, 23 seconds.

Heath Slater vs. Ryback

Slater is a scarecrow. He hammers away with right hands but loses his fake hand so it’s time for air guitar. Ryback plants him with a spinebuster, setting up the Meathook and Shell Shock for the pin at 1:28.

The Exotic Express is looking for people to party with and find Goldust, Stardust, Sin Cara as a Ninja Turtle and R-Truth as a ghost. Truth asks what it’s like to have the Bunny upstage Rose all the time and thinks Adam should have been the Bunny for Halloween. Rose laughs it off so Truth gives him a rock. The Bunny hops around Rose and that’s it. If there was a point here, I must not be smart enough to get it.

Time for MizTV with Miz saying he may be available to join Team Cena. However that’s not what we’re here to talk about. Instead, let’s focus on the special guest tonight: Mark Henry. Miz asks Mark what happened on Monday but Henry says it was exactly what should have happened. Miz shows us a clip of Rusev making Show tap, which Henry says was a result of Show trying to upstage him.

Show didn’t help Henry on Sunday and Mark gets annoyed at the WHAT chants. Henry says Show has been acting like he knows everything for months but he’s just a nosy guy with an overactive pituitary gland. It’s all about strength but here’s Big Show for a brawl. They fight at ringside with Henry sending him into the post and through the barricade.

We recap the Authority vs. Cena on Monday.

Stardust/Goldust vs. Los Matadores

Non-title. Before the match the champs say they’d listen to offers from either team at Survivor Series. So the Authority team might not be Authority members? Fernando works on Stardust’s arm to start and sends him over to Diego for a dropkick. A slingshot hilo gets two on Stardust but he comes back with a springboard dropkick of his own. The champs send Fernando to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Torito getting knocked off the apron but Fernando plants Stardust, setting up the hot tag to Diego. A hurricanrana sends Diego outside and the masked men hit a huge double suicide dive. Stardust jumps backwards onto both guys before throwing Torito inside. Torito will have none of that though and dropkicks Stardust to the floor, distracting Goldust long enough for Fernando to roll him up for the pin at 7:24. That match needed a commercial?

Rating: D. Why do we have titles anymore? The only way they set up a title match is to have the champion lose (or in this show’s case, lose TWICE to set up a match where Ziggler is just a piece), meaning we need a title match later where Los Matadores can lose. You have a roster so full of people not working and you don’t have ANYONE else for Los Matadores to beat to earn a shot? This is getting old in a hurry.

Rusev vs. Great Khali

The fans chant USA so I guess they’re neutral. Khali immediately chops Rusev in the head so the Russian hammers away in the corner. Another chop has the same result so Rusev kicks him in the face and Accolades him for the submission at 47 seconds.

Post match Lana talks about new orders from Russia: crush the US Champion and give the title to Putin as a present. This brings out Sheamus who says he’s been waiting on for a long time. The challenge is accepted because Sheamus takes personal pride in what this title represents. Sheamus comes to the ring and tries a Brogue Kick, sending Rusev running. This would be the most logical feud in the world at the moment and exactly what they should have done. It shouldn’t be surprising as Rusev’s story has been one of the few well done thing in the WWE for months now.

Here’s Bray Wyatt for a chat. Today is a special day because all of the people here get to pretend to be something that they aren’t. Have you ever wondered why costuming yourself makes you feel so comfortable? Do you wear a mask to hide from the horrors of the world? Or is it because everyone hates everything about you? You can’t pretend forever though because tomorrow morning you’re just another one of those anonymous souls.

Dean Ambrose is different though because he never takes off his mask. Ambrose is like Wyatt: a creature, an animal and a monster. Bray understands what it felt like to have someone at a point like Rollins had Ambrose on Sunday. He knows what that power feels like and it makes you feel immortal. You have the power to take everything away from someone and Dean can’t just wash away his sins. They will stain him forever and she still cries for him. Follow the buzzards.

Dean Ambrose vs. Cesaro

Street fight. There are a bunch of Halloween items at ringside, including about twenty pumpkins inside the ring, because we’ve got a theme match. Ambrose brings out a candy corn themed kendo stick because even he can make candy corn look cool. Dean hammers away to start and drops Cesaro with a bulldog.

Cesaro comes back with some kendo stick shots to the ribs and right hands to the head followed by a big swing to the chest. More stick shots have Dean in trouble but he blocks a big swing and hammers away with right hands. Cesaro comes right back with a tiger bomb for two followed by more stick shots. He piles up a bunch of pumpkins but can’t quite suplex Dean onto the pile.

Instead Dean sends him out to the floor, only to take some more stick shots. A dropkick destroys a bucket full of candy but Cesaro throws him over the announcers’ table. Ambrose pops up with a stick of his own before throwing him back inside for a backdrop on the pumpkins. They head outside again with Cesaro nailing him out of the air with a kendo stick.

Dean’s head is shoved into a bucket of apples and water but he comes back with a skeleton. Cesaro grabs a chair but gets knocked onto a table with some broom shots. A middle rope elbow with the broom sends Cesaro through the table on the floor. They head back inside where Ambrose puts a pumpkin on Cesaro’s head and Dirty Deeds is good for the pin at 7:18.

Rating: C+. This was your usual fun main event with all the weapons and props being used in the right way. Ambrose getting a pin is a good thing and makes him look stronger going into the PPV showdown with Wyatt. Bray can get by on his talking alone and Dean can look good in matches like this one.

Another Dirty Deeds ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Decent wrestling aside, this was one of the most frustrating shows I can remember in along time. We had three losses for champions and Kane of all people getting his win back instead of laying down like he should be doing at this point. Hopefully the audience for this show is so low that most people don’t watch and this doesn’t mean much. This is a decent show but it’s more frustrating than anything else.

Results

Nikki Bella won a battle royal last eliminating Alicia Fox

Kane b. Dolph Ziggler – Chokeslam

Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – Curb Stomp

Ryback b. Heath Slater – Shell Shock

Los Matadores b. Stardust/Goldust – Rollup to Goldust

Rusev b. Great Khali – Accolade

Dean Ambrose b. Cesaro – Dirty Deeds

Hell in a Cell 2014
Date: October 26, 2014
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a double main event this year as we have two matches inside the Cell for the sake of having two matches inside the Cell. First up, in what should be the main event, we have Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose in a well built feud that belongs in the Cell. On the other hand, we have Cena vs. Orton in a match that is in the Cell to fill in a spot on the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Bo Dallas vs. Mark Henry

This is a bonus match and seems to have replaced MizdowTV. Bo declares himself the new World’s Strongest Man after beating Henry four times in a row. He’s immune to Ebola (not said by name here) and is ashamed that this city shares his name. Therefore his last name is Bo Washington (the Washington Redskins are playing the Dallas Cowboys on Monday Night Football tomorrow night). Henry hammers away to start and almost throws Dallas out of his shirt. World’s Strongest Slam ends Bo in 34 seconds.

Bo says he wasn’t ready and that Henry cheated. Cheaters never win, so Bo is the winner in the record book of life and is 5-0 against Henry. Mark throws him into the barricade for good measure.

The opening video focuses on how violent the Cell can be. Most of the focus is on Orton vs. Cena, which hopefully doesn’t mean that’s the main event. Ambrose vs. Rollins gets its share of time too though.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Cesaro

This is 2/3 falls with Ziggler defending after they traded wins in the last week. Ziggler comes out first for some reason and Cole actually brings up the title being won for the first time in Rio de Janiero. Cesaro looks to have shaved the rest of his hair. We get some grappling to start with Cesaro taking him down to the mat and cranking on a chinlock. Off to a chinlock as Cesaro does some of the most obvious spot calling I’ve seen in years.

Back up and they trade rollups for two each until Ziggler gets caught in the Swing for two. Dolph kicks out but hangs on to Cesaro for a rollup and the pin at 3:43. Cesaro is furious and hammers away but misses a middle rope elbow. A STIFF right hand puts Ziggler down and we hit a kneeling reverse chinlock on the champion. Cesaro goes after the arm but still can’t tie things up. He sends Dolph to the apron for the superplex but Dolph his arm across the top rope to take over.

Dolph actually stays on the arm with a cobra clutch but Cesaro spins him around into a suplex attempt. Ziggler turns that into something like a Kimura until Cesaro drives him into the corner. The hold stays on as Cesaro climbs the ropes and throws Ziggler up for a superplex. That looked great but Cesaro can’t cover due to the arm. Ziggler is up at two and avoids a charge to send him arm first into the post, setting up the Fameasser for two. The running DDT is countered into Swiss Death for two but the Neutralizer is countered into a Stunner on the arm and the Zig Zag to retain the title at 12:24.

Rating: B-. Good match here, even though it makes me wonder why they bothered having Ziggler lose clean on Monday. Cesaro did his usual here: blow the fans’ minds with big moves and then lose anyway because I guess his victory was popping the crowd. I’m not sure where Ziggler goes after this but at least he had a good match here.

We recap the end of Raw where Rollins attacked Orton in a big surprise.

The Authority is in the back and Orton is looking for Rollins. Stephanie tells him to use his anger on Cena tonight but Orton wants to get his hands on Seth. HHH tries to calm things down again by saying Orton and Rollins are a lot alike. Randy leaves, but says if HHH doesn’t deal with Rollins, he will.

Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella

Loser is the winner’s servant for 30 days. They lock up to start with Brie sending Nikki into the corner but missing a charge. Nikki runs her over for two and a facebuster gets the same. The fans start chanting JBL because NO ONE CARES ABOUT THIS STORY. Brie plants her face first for two before hitting a few dropkicks. A running knee to the face has Nikki in trouble but she misses a charge and falls out to the floor.

She comes up clutching her knee and heads back inside to take a missile dropkick for two. Nikki pops back up and hooks the Rack for two. Brie slaps on the YES Lock but Nikki gets her feet on the ropes. Nikki comes back with a hard forearm to the face and a second Rack for the pin at 6:21.

Rating: D+. The worst part: the wrestling wasn’t all that bad. The problem with this is it’s one of the least interesting stories in years as I don’t even remember why they’re fighting. I get that it’s about Brie quitting but are we really supposed to care that a woman is dating John Cena (wait, does that relationship exist in WWE?) and had to wrestle some handicap matches against some heels. Also, if Nikki hates her sister so much, why would she want her around for thirty more days?

WWE2K15 ad.

The expert panel of Renee, Booker T., Heyman and Alex Riley talk about what we’ve seen so far.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust

The Dusts are defending. Stardust and Jimmy get things going with the twin getting slammed down. Jimmy comes back by missing a kick but gets two off a flip splash. Off to Goldust vs. Jey as the challengers take over, only to have Jimmy get sent knee first into the post. Goldust slaps on a chinlock and gets two off a powerslam. The release gordbuster drops Jimmy and we hit the chinlock again. Back up and Stardust’s bulldog is countered before Goldust is backdropped to the floor.

The hot tag brings in Jey to clean house as the Usos hit their big dives. Goldust takes the running Umaga Attack in the corner for two but Jey has to go after Stardust, allowing Goldust to get two of his own off a spinebuster. Jey superkicks him down for two more before the Usos hit stereo superplexes. There’s a Superfly Splash to Goldust but Stardust makes a save at two. A quick kick to the back of the knee sets up the Final Cut from Goldust to retain the titles at 10:25.

Rating: B-. Another good match but another case where I do not care about the story because we’ve seen these teams fight half a dozen times in six man tags over the last few weeks. The division is back to having two teams again and that makes some very dull periods. At least the wrestling is good but it’s only going to last so long.

Some singer cares about breast cancer. November can’t get here soon enough.

We recap Orton vs. Cena with a nice package on rivalries. They’re playing this up to be amongst the greatest rivalries ever but the amount of times they’ve fought hurts it a lot.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

In the Cell and the winner gets a match with Lesnar at some point in the future. Before the match the camera picks up on a Cena vs. Orton sign then zooms out when we see that it’s complaining about how many times they’ve fought. Orton takes over to start and hammers away to send Cena out to the floor. John goes face first into the steel before they head back inside. Orton brings in a chair but Cena kicks it away for a breather.

That’s fine with Randy as he headbutts Cena down and gets in a few chair shots for two. Orton drives the chair into the ribs a few times before taking Cena outside to rub his face against the Cell again. A few more rams are good for two and we hit the chinlock. Cena fights up for his comeback but walks into a kick to the head and the powerslam. The Elevated DDT is countered with a backdrop and now it’s Cena ramming him back first into the Cell.

John tries one too many times though and gets crotched against the post to change advantage again. They stay on the floor with Cena sending him back into the cage and pulling out a table. It’s set up in the corner but Orton gets in the first few blows to take over again. The RKO gets two and Cena being thrown through the table gets the same. Randy’s next weapon of choice is the stairs but Cena slams him onto the steel for two more. The AA is countered though and a low blow gets two for Randy.

The STF goes on but Orton makes the ropes. This is the Cell though so it means nothing, meaning Orton has to crawl under the ropes to escape. John picks up the steps and throws them as hard as he can through the ropes, only to hit the Cell by mistake. Back in and they trade finishers for two each, including the AA countered into the RKO. Even the fans knew to expect that spot. Another AA gets two but both guys are down. Randy brings in another table and crotches him on the top but a middle rope RKO is countered into a middle rope AA through the table for the pin at 25:50.

Rating: B. They went with the regular big match showdown here and that’s the best thing they could have done. These two are almost out of ideas and thankfully they had a good one here. It wasn’t a masterpiece or anything but they know how to work the big match formula. Also thank goodness this was the first half main event instead of having it close the show.

Cena stares Heyman down.

Big Show and Henry are getting ready in the back.

US Title: Miz vs. Sheamus

Sheamus is defending. Apparently the MizdowTV did happen as the pre-shows are now all an hour long. There doesn’t seem to be much to it as Miz praised Mizdow and Sheamus might have Brogue Kicked a cameraman. Sheamus starts the match with a Brogue Kick attempt but Miz bails to the ropes. That’s fine with Sheamus as he grabs the ten forearms, complete with Mizdow grabbing the bottom rope and selling them as well.

They head outside with Miz taking out Mizdow by mistake but actually using the distraction to nail Sheamus and take over. Sheamus quickly fights back and hits the rolling fireman’s carry on the floor for two. He motions that it’s time for the face but Miz takes him down and gets two of his own off the low DDT. The fans chant for Mizdow as Miz counters White Noise into a failed Figure Four attempt. Sheamus scores with a powerslam and calls for the Brogue, only to have to go after Mizdow. Miz’s rollup doesn’t work but the Skull Crushing Finale gets two. Not that it matters as the Brogue Kick retains the title at 8:25.

Rating: C. Mizdow was the star of this match and I’m hoping they get to his face turn soon enough. Maybe they can have him get the title off Sheamus soon enough and make Miz jealous or something like that but it would be better than Sheamus beating them up every week. Match was nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw.

Post match Mizdow lays next to Miz so Sheamus has some fun with them by making Miz, and Sandow as a result, do the YMCA dance.

Brie has to load up Nikki’s bags in the car and is all evil about a smoothie. You can guess where the smoothie winds up.

We recap Rusev vs. Big Show. In short: America good, Russia bad, repeat for six to eight weeks and throw in Rusev kicking a US soldier.

Rusev vs. Big Show

Lana is in pink tonight. They slug it out to start with Rusev getting the better of it by going after the leg to put Show down. Rusev stays on the leg with the wide variety of leg stuff that you often see used on giants as this isn’t off to the hottest start in the world. A nice suplex drops Show again for two. The Accolade is countered into something like Charlie Haas’ Haas of Pain but Rusev is right next to the ropes.

Back up and Show hits a spear as Henry comes out. There’s the chokeslam to Rusev and he rolls outside, only to have Show call Henry off and throw Rusev back in. There’s the jumping superkick to Show and Henry, followed by two more to Show. The Accolade goes on and Show gives up at 8:04.

Rating: D. This was every big Rusev match we’ve seen so far but there’s only so much you can do with osmeone like Big Show. There’s no doubt in who is going to win these things and that’s the problem with someone like Rusev. He really needs to move up to someone more mobile now and Sheamus might be just the right option.

You know breast cancer? It’s still bad.

Ambrose goes on a rant about Seth Rollins as a Halloween costume resembling roadkill and oatmeal on a pogo stick. It didn’t make any more sense when he said it.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Paige

AJ is defending and Alicia Fox is in Paige’s corner. They trade knockdowns to start until Paige kicks her in the ribs to take over. AJ comes back with a rolling cradle for two and they head outside with AJ having to nail Fox. Back in and Paige takes over with some shots to the back and a double arm crank to kill some time. They get back up and Paige stays on her, including a fall away slam (complete with skipping) for two. Back outside with AJ sending her head first into the barricade, setting up the Black Widow to retain at 6:55.

Rating: D+. Not terrible here but again, I’m sick of seeing these two fight. They’ve had like five or six matches on PPV already and there’s just no need to have them go at it anymore. Much like the tag division, there’s such a lack of depth to this title and it’s really starting to show again.

The Cell is lowered and we recap Ambrose vs. Rollins. Seth turned on the Shield and joined the Authority, sending Dean on a quest for revenge. The Authority kept interfering so let’s lock them in a big box.

Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins

Dean is out first and throws a bunch of chairs and some bags in the ring before climbing the Cell. Rollins comes out but doesn’t want to go up so he sends the Stooges up instead. They go up and get the beating you would expect, only to have Rollins sneak up and destroy Ambrose with the Stooges’ help. There hasn’t been a bell yet. They slowly climb halfway down the side of the cage and we get the first major spot of the match as they ram each other into the Cell and fly through the announcers’ tables.

Both guys are put on stretchers as the match stops. Dean realizes what’s going on though and gets off his stretcher. He goes after Rollins and drags him into the Cell to officially start things off. Dean busts out some duct tape but blasts Seth over and over again with a chair instead of using it. He tries the screwdriver to Seth’s face but Rollins snaps his throat across the top to escape. Dean pops back up and dropkicks Rollins into the Cell to take over again. They get back inside so Dean can clothesline Seth out to the floor.

The suicide dive sends Seth into the Cell wall and Rollins is almost dead. Back in again and Dean piles up chairs but gets suplexed onto them instead. Dean gets right back up and puts Seth across a table at ringside for a middle rope elbow ala Cactus Jack. He rubs Seth’s face into the steel but Kane pops up with a fire extinguisher to blind Ambrose. Seth powerbombs Dean through a standing table against the Cell and they go back inside again.

The Curb Stomp gets two and Seth is frustrated. He goes outside for the briefcase but instead just destroys Dean with chair shots. Rollins puts him head first on the briefcase but Dean counters with Dirty Deeds, only to have Seth escape with a kick to the head. Dean comes back with a Rebound clothesline and a briefcase shot to the face for an even closer two.

Now it’s cinder block time with Dean loading up a Curb Stomp of his own but we’ve got Wyatts. Well at least Bray speaking in tongues and now a lantern in the ring. Smoke fills the ring and we have what looks like a ghost in the middle of it. Bray pops up and nails Ambrose as the lights go out again. Back up with Bray spider walking over to Ambrose and laying him out with a release Rock Bottom to give a shocked Rollins the pin at 13:48.

Rating: B+. It’s a good fight but the ending hurts it a bit. This is probably the best option they could have gone with as you don’t want Rollins losing but you also don’t want Dean to lose all of his heat. Ambrose vs. Wyatt should be good but I would have liked this feud to have a more definitive ending. Unfortunately that wasn’t really possible and this puts Bray back in the spotlight with a feud he could actually win.

Dean takes Sister Abigail to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The big matches delivered but man alive does the midcard need to be replenished. Most of the stuff in there just feels like we’ve seen it a million times before and it’s really hard to care again. They desperately need to figure out something other than “put the wrestlers in tag matches” or “just have them fight a few times before they fight again on PPV” because it’s killing the PPV matches. Still though, it’s an entertaining show and that’s all you can hope for with gimmick shows.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Cesaro – Zig Zag

Nikki Bella b. Brie Bella – Rack

Goldust/Stardust b. Usos – Final Cut to Jimmy Uso

John Cena b. Randy Orton – Middle rope Attitude Adjustment

Sheamus b. Miz – Brogue Kick

Rusev b. Big Show – Accolade
AJ Lee b. Paige – Black Widow

Seth Rollins b. Dean Ambrose – Pin after a Rock Bottom from Bray Wyatt

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Today is Brie Bella. Let’s get this over with.

This is going to be about Brie, not about the Bella Twins. Well at least in regular tag matches.

The Bellas got hired in September 2007 and were sent to FCW. After about a year in developmental, Brie would debut on Smackdown on August 29, 2008.

Victoria vs. Brie Bella

The best part of this: Taz and JR hype up Classics on Demand with FORTY hours of content a month just eight bucks. Victoria grabs a headlock to start and sends Brie into the corner, only to get taken down by some fling snapmares. A backbreaker gets two on Brie and the standing moonsault gets the same but Victoria stops to talk a lot of trash. She can back it up though as a kick to the ribs puts Brie on the floor. Back in and Brie grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere.

Here’s a classic from ECW on SyFy on March 30, 2009.

Nikki Bella vs. Brie Bella

Nikki comes out with Miz and Morrison but Brie counters with Carlito and Primo. Brie grabs a quick rollup for two before just hammering away at her sister’s face. Some armdrags put Nikki down but she grabs a quick suplex for two. Brie hooks a bulldog but the tag teams get in a brawl, allowing Nikki to roll up Brie for the pin.

Rating: D. Somehow this is going to be even worse when we get the big showdown in a few months. The girls just aren’t that good in the ring and it really shows in these matches. Nikki and Brie try out there but they seem to take things way more seriously than they should and it drags everything down. Just be good looking women and shake your hips.

To Superstars on July 16, 2009.

Brie Bella vs. Katie Lea

A quick rollup gets two for Brie and a snapmare puts Katie down. Katie comes right back with a backbreaker for two and a dropkick to the back. Brie gets back up and they slug it out with Brie taking over, only to get kicked to the floor. Twin Magic lets Nikki grab a rollup for the pin.

We’ll jump ahead to Brie being a pro on NXT, October 26, 2010.

Brie Bella vs. AJ

The Bellas have split up and aren’t living together anymore. Oh hey Primo is here again. I forgot he existed. Big clothesline by Brie gets two. I know I’m in the minority here but the Bellas are gorgeous and this is no exception. AJ gets two feet up to block a charge so Brie hits the floor. Nikki gets on her and Primo says DON’T DO IT! AJ gets a half rear naked choke (what kind of a name is that anyway?) half sleeper which gets her nowhere. AJ is all aggressive here but not in a heel style. Nikki pulls Brie out when the referee isn’t looking and a bad looking X Factor ends it for Nikki in a little over 4:00.

Rating: C-. This was a bit better than the first with an actual angle is involved here so that always tends to help. AJ was impressive here but I guess she’s not supposed to beat the Pros here. This wasn’t much here but it could have been far worse. It’s so interesting to see Brie as the star instead of the future huge star in AJ.

Time for a mixed tag on Raw, December 6, 2010.

Ted DiBiase/Maryse vs. Daniel Bryan/Brie Bella

Before the match we see Daniel Bryan coming out of a locker room with Brie Bella. Nikki comes up and seems rather jealous. I’m liking where this is going. The guys start us off and here comes Nikki. The Bellas are looking very good tonight in red. Punk says he’s seeing double. There’s a Foreigner song in there somewhere. Bryan beats on Ted for a few seconds before the girls come in. Maryse gets beaten on for a bit. Ted comes in for the save and it’s a big brawl a minute and a half in. There’s the Twin Magic and Nikki rolls up Maryse for the pin at 2:12.

Another Raw from April 11, 2011.

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Brie Bella

Brie allegedly won a Divas battle royal to win this shot. Wasn’t that weeks ago and she got the shot already? Eve brings a marker to have an X put on Nikki’s hand so we know she’s on the floor. That’s rather intelligent. Brie takes her down to start but Eve makes her comeback with a dropkick and the standing moonsault for two. Eve gets her in the Tree of Woe and when she’s being taken off there’s a switch. While Nikki is being taken out Brie sneaks up on her and an X-Factor gives Brie the title at 2:20. Weak match but all the girls looked good from a looks perspective at least.

Time for a PPV title match at Over the Limit 2011.

Divas Title: Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly

Cole even says this will be boring. This is about what you would expect: both girls do a few things, neither really are that good, both look good in tiny shorts, which is why they have their jobs I suppose. LONG armbar by Brie wastes some time. There’s Twin Magic, X–Factor, Nikki gets the pin to give Brie the title.

Rating: F. Dang it why did this have to be long enough to grade? The match was awful the whole way through as they have no business being on PPV. Watching Nunzio as the referee and the girls looking good are the only high spots here. Also, no sign of Kharma. How in the world can you validate this being on PPV? I give up.

A rematch on Raw, August 29, 100.

Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella

Oh joy, it’s this match again. Kelly hammers away to start and we cut to Beth and Natalya complaining about someone else that are causing the problems. They should be in the ring, not Kelly. The twins switch places and Nikki gets the pin with an X-Factor at 1:18.

We need gimmicks! From the live Holiday Special Smackdown on November 29, 2011.

Alicia Fox vs. Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella vs. Natalya vs. Kaitlyn vs. AJ vs. Tamina vs. Aksana

This is a mistletoe on a pole match, which means you have to climb up and get the mistletoe. The winner gets something they can cash in before Christmas. Brie wins at 57 seconds after climbing on Nikki. I have no idea if I got all the competitors or not, not do I care.

The Bellas would leave WWE for about a year and do pretty much nothing in their time away. Here they are back at Summerslam 2013.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

This is the Total Divas match. You can add Natalya to the list of people who have fallen through the floor in a year. She has the Funkadactyls with her while Brie has Nikki and Eva Marie. I’m not sure who has the better backup here. Feeling out process to start with both girls doing their best choreographed spots. Brie slaps her in the face but has to head to the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter attempt.

Natalya is sent to the floor and caught with a baseball slide to the back as a JBL chant starts up. Now it’s a Michael Cole chant, followed by the required Jerry version. Brie drops a leg and cranks on a chinlock as the fans want tables. Natalya fights up and puts on a quick Sharpshooter but Brie sends her into the corner. The other Divas get into it on the floor and we hit another chinlock from Brie. Back up and a sunset flip is countered into a Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 4:19.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. It doesn’t hold up, the fans don’t care, and the whole thing is a waste of time. The girls didn’t even look all that great here as most of their outfits looked like they belonged in the 1950s. The fact that Total Divas didn’t get the Divas Title off of AJ continues to astound me.

Another title shot at Battleground 2013.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Brie Bella

Brie is challenging and takes AJ down with ease, sending the champion out to the floor. AJ hides behind Tamina and heads back inside to take over. Brie is sent into the post and AJ goes after the arm, wrapping it around the middle rope. Brie’s DDT is countered into a DDT on the arm for two before sending her shoulder first “into” the post.

AJ keeps shouting about being better than Brie before going off on the bad arm with elbows. Off to a Fujiwara Armbar but AJ lets it go to skip around the ring. Brie dropkicks her down and hits some really basic stuff before knocking AJ down with a running knee. Tamina is choking Nikki Bella down though and the distraction lets AJ roll up Brie for the pin with a handful of tights at 6:32.

Rating: D+. To recap this story, AJ won the Divas Title clean, defeated every one of the Total Divas in the same match with a completely clean submission hold, and has held the title against all of them, but we’re supposed to boo her because the other girls are catty to each other on a reality show. The match was nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw, but the fans were more into it than they were the IC Title match.

Here’s validation for a rematch on Smackdown, October 18, 2013.

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee

Brie has a banged up shoulder. AJ immediately bails to the floor a few times but Tamina blocks Brie from going after her. Tamina finally moves and Brie gets in a right hand before sending it back inside. AJ absorbs everything Brie throws at her and snaps the bad arm over the top rope to take over. Off to an armbar as Brie screams a lot. Brie’s arm is wrapped around the middle rope and it’s already back to another armbar. The twin comes back with an elbow in the corner and a middle rope missile dropkick for two. Nikki throws Tamina into the steps, allowing Brie to grab a TERRIBLE looking Bella Buster for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: D. If this is supposed to make me sympathize with or care about the Bellas, it’s not quite working. I have a hard time caring about two beautiful women on a reality show who happen to be sleeping with two of the three top guys in the company. The whole feud started because AJ said she was a wrestler and Brie is a reality TV personality but we’re supposed to like the reality TV star on the wrestling show. Yet WWE is surprised it’s not working.

And the rematch at Hell in a Cell 2013.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Brie Bella

AJ is defending. Brie gets shoved down to start and it’s off to a quick chinlock. The fans are noticeably not that interested in the match to put it mildly. A neckbreaker puts Brie down and AJ skips around the ring to the only reaction so far. AJ hooks a guillotine choke but Brie drives her into the corner and hits a middle rope dropkick to put the champion down.

A few more dropkicks have AJ in trouble but she sends Brie into the corner to stop her. The Black Widow is countered and Brie puts on a half crab as Nikki beats up Tamina. AJ makes the rope and Brie’s running knee hits her sister, allowing the Black Widow to retain the title for AJ at 5:20.

Rating: D+. THANK GOODNESS. It’s so nice to see the talented and popular wrestler get the chance for once instead of bowing to reality TV. This likely sets up the Bella feud which no one is interested in but will give us lots of moments to look at the camera for some very REAL heart to heart moments.

Time for a six Divas tag on Raw, February 10, 2014.

Aksana/Alicia Fox/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins/Cameron

Nikkia hits a quick facebuster on AJ to start and sends her to the floor before it’s off to Aksana. Nikki does the Worm for no apparent reason and kicks Aksana in the back for two. Brie comes in and is slammed down for two and it’s off to Alicia for another slam out of the corner for two more. A rollup gets two for Brie and Alicia runs her over to set up a chinlock. Nikki is sent to the floor as Cameron gets the hot tag and cleans house. Cameron takes Alicia down with a headscissors and gets two off a dropkick to the side of the head. A DDT, apparently called Girl Bye is enough to pin Fox at 4:43.

Rating: D-. Next. That’s all I’ve got here.

Off to a big mess at Wrestlemania XXX where the Bellas kind of stole the show.

Divas Title: Vickie Guerrero Invitational

Aksana, Alicia Fox, AJ Lee, Naomi, Brie Bella, Cameron, Emma, Eva Marie, Layla, Natalya, Nikki Bella, Rosa Mendes, Summer Rae, Tamina Snuka.

So AJ is defending and is facing the entire division, as in thirteen other girls. Good reaction for the champion but this is the death spot to end all death spots. Vickie is at ringside holding the title. AJ and Tamina are thrown into the middle of the ring and beaten on for a solid three seconds before it breaks down. Everyone is in the ring at the same time mind you. The fans want refunds and chant for Undertaker.

There’s nothing to call here other than the girls look good in their outfits and Rosa looks bizarre with short bleach blonde hair. Natalya tries a triple Sharpshooter on Cameron, Rosa and someone else but Eva makes the save. A quadruple suplex gets four near falls before Cameron hits a running Codebreaker on the champion. Cameron’s top has been ripped apart and she keeps having to cover up.

The Emma Sandwich crushes Summer and it’s time for the Parade of Finishers/moves that are allegedly finishers because most of these girls don’t ever win anything. Eva, in a swimsuit, shoves Tamina down but runs away from her. Everyone but the Bellas are knocked to the floor and the twins hit some nice suicide dives to take them out. Now it’s time for the Bellas to fight but Alicia and Nattie come back in to break it up. Tamina nails Natalya with a Samoan drop but Naomi breaks up the Splash. Natalya slams Aksana off the top for two and AJ puts Naomi in the Black Widow for the submission to retain at 6:43.

Rating: D+. There were fourteen girls in there at once and one fall to a finish. What in the world were you expecting here? Also they knew there was no way anyone was going to care and they didn’t really try to fight it. Those dives by the Bellas were nice though. Odds are this sets up Paige debuting though as there’s literally no one left for AJ to beat. Or Kharma comes back.

We’ll wrap it up with the biggest match of Brie’s career, arguably the second main event at Summerslam 2014.

Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon

Stephanie is almost in a black superhero outfit. They slowly shove each other to start until Stephanie stomps away in the corner. Brie comes back with a YES Lock attempt to send Stephanie running outside, but she blocks Brie’s suicide dive with a forearm. Back in and a Hennig necksnap gets two on Brie as the announcers talk about how awesome Stephanie is. She stomps on Brie’s head and cranks on the arms as Brie looks mildly annoyed.

Brie finally kicks her in the face so Stephanie turns on the EVIL FACE, only to get caught by a Thesz Press. Some kicks in the ribs have Stephanie in trouble and a hair drag does the same. A middle rope missile dropkick gets two on McMahon and there are some HORRIBLE looking right hands.

Cue HHH for a distraction but Brie counters Stephanie’s Pedigree attempt into the YES Lock, but HHH pulls the referee to the floor. Brie kicks HHH down and starts a YES chant as Nikki is at ringside as well. Nikki comes in and stops Stephanie from leaving before turning on Brie as almost everyone expected her to. Nikki helps Stephanie up and a Pedigree gives her the pin at 11:05.

Rating: C+. Well you knew she wasn’t going to job. It’s on a bit of an adjusted scale but the match was shockingly good. That being said, it was NOWHERE near enough to justify the push its been receiving. All this to set up the Bellas fighting each other? They really think this is something people are going to be interested in? Dear goodness imagine the promos we’re going to have to sit through. The girls all looked good though.

I think I’ve covered my thoughts on Brie Bella over the last few months. She’s a very pretty woman who can rock a tight outfit, but her in ring work can only get her so far. Her acting skills on the other hand are about as horrible as humanly possible. I don’t think the fans care about the Bellas’ drama and just want to see them in outfits and looking good. There’s nothing wrong with the Divas having stories, but hearing about Brie wrecking Nikki’s car at 16 and shouting about holding each other back isn’t it. Brie has her place and is good at it when she isn’t pushed way over her head.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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WWE has been nailing most of their pay per views this year but they had their work cut out for them with Night of Champions. It was a one match show and that match was a rematch. The fact that Roman Reigns is out of action for a few months due to hernia surgery makes things even shakier. Let’s get to it.

The pre-show feature was the Peep Show with Christian having Chris Jericho as his guest. This was about as pointless as I can remember as it was just the two of them making jokes about stuff from ten years ago and a brief exchange with Orton. To be fair though it’s better than a boring match that doesn’t get anywhere….I think.

The show itself opened with the Dusts taking the Tag Team Titles from the Usos. The match was fine but nothing all that memorable. These two teams have been looking very polished lately and this was another good match between them. Stardust pinned Jimmy after blocking the Superfly Splash for the titles, which is a fine ending for the seven month title reign.

Dolph and R-Ziggler did a spot for Mountain Dew.

Sheamus defending the US Title against Cesaro in a pretty awesome power brawl. There’s something cool about two monsters beating on each other for about thirteen minutes. Sheamus is at his best when he gets all fired up and starts hurting people. The same is true for Cesaro and it’s great to see two guys who can hit each other just as hard. I also liked the ending as it wasn’t a change of pace into a rollup or something but rather Sheamus hitting Cesaro with his big power move for the pin. You don’t get that enough anymore.

Big Show fired up Mark Henry before his match. That’s the end of Big Show’s involvement tonight.

Now we get to the bad part of the night: country band Florida Georgia Line jumped in on commentary for the Intercontinental Title match with Miz and Ziggler. The match itself wasn’t bad but I really do not need a band that has nothing to do with WWE other than appearing at Tribute to the Troops this year. They got involved by shoving Mizdow and that’s about it, other than the camera looking at them every few seconds. Miz won the title with a rollup and a handful of trunks but the wrestling took a long backseat to the low level celebrity nonsense.

We got a video on Reigns’ injury with some words from his doctor. Reigns will be out for several months, which might be the shakeup WWE has been needing.

Seth Rollins came out to brag about beating Reigns by forfeit before issuing an open challenge. Apparently Dean Ambrose was watching the show in a cab (which just happened to be sitting in the back) as he got out of said cab and charged to the ring to attack Rollins. This was the usual awesome brawl between these two until security got Ambrose down and handcuffed him. They’re doing a great job of only giving us a little bit of Ambrose vs. Rollins before they finally (and hopefully) lock them inside a Cell and let them just destroy each other.

Rusev basically squashed Mark Henry to make Jim Duggan cry somewhere. Henry was never really in control and wound up tapping out to the Accolade. Have Henry pass out or something but don’t have him tap out inside of five seconds.

Arguably the match of the night was Jericho vs. Orton which was a very nice surprise as I had no reason to care about this match coming in but they had me interested at the end. That’s a very hard thing to pull off but they managed to make it work. Orton caught Jericho coming off the top with an RKO for the pin. Odds are that sends Jericho back to the rock scene and there’s nothing wrong with that. These three month runs are as good as he’s going to get anymore and this worked fine. Jericho’s best match in this comeback too.

Brie Bella said she hopes Nikki doesn’t win because it will make her sister even worse. This would wind up being a plot point on Raw because this feud just has to keep going.

AJ won the title back, thankfully by making Nikki tap out. Paige vs. AJ is an interesting feud but they need to do something other than skip around and kiss the belt. Nikki continues to look great in her outfits and when she’s shaking her hips, but the Divas Title needs to either be the wrestling title or the stupid drama title. As long as they keep it off the Bellas and their stupid feud though, I’m good.

Cena beat Lesnar via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered and tried to cash in his briefcase. This sets up some future stuff with Rollins being placed into the main event scene and hopefully giving us a break from Cena vs. Lesnar. Their stuff has been good (including this match) but they’re reaching the point of overkill with it.

As for the match itself, Cena was far more competitive here and managed to avoid most of the suplexes. Lesnar managed to hit seven or eight but Cena got in enough offense to keep things competitive. He had Lesnar mostly beat when Rollins came in which is a solid idea and gives Cena a reason for a rematch later on. Something interesting about Lesnar: he’s viewed as this unstoppable monster but since his comeback in 2012, he’s only 6-4. That’s a great nod to his intimidation and Heyman’s promos.

Night of Champions was a good but definitely not great show. The main event was good enough and they did a solid job with some of the other matches. There’s some interesting stuff in the coming months and that’s something good for WWE after the months of repetitive stuff.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 22, 2014
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re past Night of Champions and heading towards Hell in a Cell in about five weeks. The main story is Seth Rollins breaking up Cena’s very close near fall on Brock Lesnar to end the show. The key is it makes Cena believe he can beat Lesnar, likely setting up another match inside the Cell. If they let them go nuts, that could be a classic. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event and Lesnar laying out Cena to end the show.

Here’s the returning Dean Ambrose to start things off. “I’M NOT DEAD!” Dean says he’s had to replay the incident over and over again and he can appreciate being attacked two on one. We look at Kane and Rollins giving him a curb stomp onto some cinder blocks. The Authority going to such lengths to get rid of him makes him feel special. Tonight he’s the authority and he isn’t leaving until he gets his hands on Seth Rollins because he never gets tired of hitting Seth Rollins in the face.

Dean gets a chair and sits in the middle of the ring but here’s Cena to interrupt. Ambrose says he doesn’t like Cena standing in the ring with him right now and Cena doesn’t want Ambrose having a reason to not like him. Cena says he has a reason to be angry because Seth Rollins stopped him from beating Brock Lesnar last night. He wants Rollins tonight and says no one is going to stop him, implying he’ll fight Ambrose to get to Seth. Dean says not to get in his way but Cena gets ready to fight. Ambrose takes his jacket off but here’s the full Authority to interrupt.

HHH says Rollins won’t be fighting tonight but Cena and Ambrose will. Cena and Ambrose aren’t interested in listening and charge at the Authority. Rollins bails with Ambrose and Cena giving chase. We cut to the back with Rollins running away from Ambrose and Cena before stealing a car to escape. Dean and John look at each other but nothing happens.

After a break, the Authority has a meeting and makes Kane vs. Ambrose and Cena vs. Orton. Kane isn’t pleased but agrees to the chance for revenge. Orton doesn’t like having to put out Rollins’ fires. WWE announced Orton vs. Ambrose before the show so I guess they already changed it.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is defending after winning the title last night and Mizdow has a small replica title in a nice touch. No R-Ziggler in Dolph’s corner either. We actually get big match intros. Feeling out process to start with Dolph grabbing a headlock but getting Miz scores with a shoulder. A knee to the ribs puts Ziggler down and we hit the chinlock. The Figure Four is countered, sending Miz shoulder first into the post. Not that it matters much though as Ziggler gets caught with a neckbreaker onto the apron and we take a break.

Back with Miz hitting the corner clothesline but he gets dropkicked out of the air when trying the top rope ax handle. The Fameasser is countered but Dolph hits the running DDT to put both guys down. Back up and Miz blocks the superkick before slapping on the Figure Four. Ziggler eventually gets to the ropes and rolls to the floor where he clotheslines Miz and Mizdow.

Back in and Miz hits a quick Skull Crushing Finale for a very close two. Ziggler gets the same off the Fameasser but Miz blocks the Zig Zag. A superkick knocks Mizdow off the apron but Miz rolls Dolph up and grabs the trunks. Dolph rolls through though and grabs a rollup (and trunks) of his own to get the title back at 12:56.

Rating: C+. The near falls were good here and Ziggler feels like he earned the belt, but what in the world is the point in trading the title back and forth in two days? Both guys get an extra title reign and now we’re right back where we were twenty four hours ago. I like that they’re having some action, but how about letting something last more than a day?

We recap Reigns being taken off the card and Ambrose coming in to fight Rollins.

Jack Swagger vs. Bo Dallas

Swagger takes him into the corner to start but Dallas takes him across the ring for a knee to the ribs. A clothesline drops Jack and some knee drops to the head get two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jack runs him over and hits a Vader Bomb. Dallas goes back to the ribs and gets two off a neckbreaker. Not that it matters as a quick Patriot Lock makes Bo tap at 3:18.

Rating: D. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but is there a point to having them alternate wins on three straight shows? That’s the second match in a row where the guys are just trading victories and I’m not sure who is gaining anything out of it. Swagger winning is a good thing at least.

Zeb makes fun of Bo’s catchphrase post match.

We get a quick tribute to Howard Stern Show personality Eric the Actor who died over the weekend.

Summer Rae vs. Natalya

This is your Total Divas match of the week with Summer calling Natalya jealous to start. We get a clip from the three month old issue that started this problem where Natalya pulled Summer out of a car. Rae takes her down for a figure four full nelson followed by a front chancery. Natalya comes back by slamming Summer’s face into the mat and one of the worst looking discus lariats I’ve ever seen. Summer was falling down before any contact and it looked awful. Rosa Mendes and Layla get in a fight on the floor as the Sharpshooter makes Summer tap at 2:20.

Dean Ambrose vs. Kane

Ambrose hammers away in the corner to start and takes Kane down with right hands. A middle rope elbow to the jaw gets one but Dean has to fight out of a chokeslam attempt. Dean sends him out to the floor and nails a suicide dive but Kane takes him down with a big boot and sends Ambrose into the steps. Back in and Kane works on an armbar before uppercutting Dean out of the air for two.

It’s back to the armbar which Kane is barely cranking on. They get up with Dean nailing a DDT followed by the Rebound Clothesline. A missile dropkick gets two on Kane but he pops back up and grabs Dean by the throat for the chokeslam. Ambrose quickly counters into Dirty Deeds but Rollins runs out for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: C. Better match than expected here but it’s still nothing great. I don’t see why you couldn’t have Kane get pinned here but at least Ambrose had him beaten at the end. Dean is on fire after everything that has happened to him and with no Reigns around, there’s a big door open for him if he they use him right.

Dean fights off Rollins but Kane plants him with a chokeslam. Rollins goes back to get some more but Dean has a chair and tells him to come on. Seth backs down of course.

After a break, Ambrose is locked in a room by security and the Authority. Stephanie: “Have we ever thrown someone out that didn’t come back?” I love logical lines like that.

We get the video on Reigns’ surgery and the repeated announcement that he’ll be out for months.

Sheamus/Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust/Cesaro

Jey and Goldust start things off with a quick feeling out before it’s off to Jimmy for a big backdrop. Off to Stardust who sends Jimmy into the corner but has to duck a superkick. The Dusts bail to the floor for a breather and it’s off to Sheamus to hammer on Cesaro. They trade heavy forearms before tagging in Goldust and Jey with the Uso getting two off a splash. Back to Stardust for some forearms to Jey’s back before they trade armbars. Goldust comes back in as Stardust trips him up as we take a break.

Back with Jey fighting out of Stardust’s dragon sleeper before getting up a boot in the corner. The hot tag brings in Sheamus to clean house with the rolling fireman’s carry and ten forearms to the chest. Stardust escapes a powerslam but tags in Cesaro who pulls Sheamus out to the floor in a big crash. Back in and a middle rope ax handle gets two on Sheamus and Cesaro puts on something like a reverse Crippler Crossface. Goldust comes in again for a chinlock and knee drop before tagging back to his brother.

Sheamus fights out of a front facelock before blocking a top rope cross body with an ax handle to put both guys down. The double tag brings in Jey and Goldust with the Uso cleaning house. Jimmy makes a quick tag and hits a Whisper in the Wind to both champions. Everything breaks down and the Superfly Splash hits Goldust’s knees. The Final Cut looks to finish Jimmy but Sheamus makes a last second save. Cesaro and Sheamus go outside and Jey hits the Superfly Splash on Goldust for the pin at 15:42.

Rating: C. The match was ok but it felt much more long than good. The Usos should get a rematch after being champions for seven months and this is a decent enough way of setting it up. At least it’s better than just saying “oh they have a rematch clause.” Sheamus vs. Cesaro again would be entertaining but there are other challengers to go after the title.

Rollins comes up to Orton and doesn’t like the putting out fires line from earlier. Seth agrees to be in his corner later tonight.

Here’s the Next Generation thing they’ve been talking about. As is almost always the case, it’s for the new video game. This is set to Bawitaba by Kid Rock of all sings.

Mark Henry comes out to address the fans after his loss to Rusev last night. He says he’s heartbroken and can’t believe he let everyone down. This brings out Rusev and Lana for some Russian gloating. Lana tells everyone to shut up and makes fun of the Memphis crowd. She offers Henry another match with Rusev tonight and Henry says bring it on.

Rusev vs. Mark Henry

This is joined in progress with Rusev hammering away and taking Henry down for a side choke. We look at Henry getting his back injured last night as the hold keeps going. Mark fights up so Rusev dropkicks him down and puts the hold on again. Henry finally stays up and slams Rusev down but hurts his back again. They head outside with Rusev being sent into the steps after trying to drive Henry in again. Back in and Henry tries a very slow Vader Bomb but gets pulled down, sending him ribs first into the mat. The Accolade makes Henry pass out at 7:30.

Rating: D+. This was long and dull but it was a much better ending than last night. Not that it matters after Henry looked like such a loser after last night but at least they’re getting the right idea. I could have done without another rematch this soon though as this is the second from last night and third from the last week.

Adam Rose/The Bunny vs. Heath Slater/Titus O’Neil

It had to happen eventually. Titus runs over Rose to start and hits an over the shoulder backbreaker. Off to Slater for a side kick and a chinlock as the Bunny plays cheerleader on the apron. Rose kicks Slater away but Titus breaks up the hot tag attempt. The Bunny ducks a right hand from O’Neil and Adam finally makes the hot tag. The Bunny comes in with a bunch of kicks and a few tail wags before low bridging Titus to the floor. A big spinning kick to the face drops Slater and a seated senton off the apron takes out Titus. The Party Foul is enough for the pin on Slater at 3:10.

Rating: C+. Yeah I liked it. I don’t think there’s much else to be said here.

Here’s Nikki Bella to address Brie’s interview last night where Brie said she didn’t want Nikki to become Divas Champion. She immediately calls out Brie for a chat and trash is already being talked. Nikki says Brie should be called Nikki’s Trashy Sister and wants to be the only Bella. Brie won’t do it so Nikki brings up the obvious question: why hasn’t Brie taken her husband’s name? Nikki calls Bryan a troll so Brie tries a YES Lock, sending Nikki running to the floor.

AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella

Paige is on commentary. AJ cranks on the arm to start before taking the non-champion down with a headscissors. A pair of neckbreakers get two on Nikki and they head out to the floor. Nikki sends AJ into Paige and the Brit is ticked off. Back in and Nikki gets two before putting on a swinging sleeper. There’s a cross armbreaker on AJ but she powers out, only to get caught in an Alabama Slam for two. Back up and Nikki misses a charge into the corner, allowing AJ to put on the Black Widow for the submission at 5:10.

Rating: D+. The longer the Bellas aren’t around a championship the better things are. Nikki wanting to fight over the Bella name is about as stupid of a way as they could go but that’s what this entire feud has been since the beginning. Thankfully AJ has dominated them every time to keep the evil from coming even more to the forefront.

A large black box is brought to ringside.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Randy takes him down with a headlock to starts but Cena quickly shakes him off, only to get pounded down in the corner. Now it’s John firing off right hands, followed by a bulldog for two. We take a break and come back with Cena being sent to the floor and into the announcers’ table. The Elevated DDT is countered with a backdrop over the top and Cena has a breather. Back in and they collide but it’s Orton up first and taking Cena into the corner.

Orton puts on a sleeper for a bit until Cena escapes with the ProtoBomb. Randy escapes an STF attempt and takes Cena’s head off with a clothesline. He loads up a superplex but opts for a top rope Elevated DDT for a very close two instead. Cena pops back to his feet and grabs the STF, drawing in Kane and Rollins for the DQ at 15:15.

Rating: C. How in the world was this a fifteen minute match? This really didn’t work too well as it felt like they were just waiting to get to the obvious Ambrose surprise at the end. Rollins has now run in on three matches in two days which is a bit much to put it mildly. The match wasn’t bad but it ran longer than it needed to.

Post match the Authority loads up the Curb Stomp on the blocks under the box, but it’s Ambrose because….well what else was it going to be? Dean destroys everything in sight and Rollins runs off, leaving Ambrose and Cena to clean house to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show wasn’t bad but it was mainly a long recap of last night. I really liked the opening sequence with Ambrose and Cena looking like the new Super Best Friends trying to take down the Authority. The ending helped that story but there wasn’t much between the opening and closing. It was mainly recaps and rematches which weren’t very good in the first place. That being said, it was nice to go completely away from the Lesnar stuff, at least for a week. It’s not the worst show in a long time but it didn’t blow my skirt up.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Miz – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Jack Swagger b. Bo Dallas – Patriot Lock

Natalya b. Summer Rae – Sharpshooter

Dean Ambrose b. Kane via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Sheamus/Usos b. Cesaro/Goldust/Stardust – Superfly Splash to Goldust

Rusev b. Mark Henry via referee stoppage

AJ Lee b. Nikki Bella – Black Widow

John Cena b. Randy Orton via DQ when Seth Rollins and Kane interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Night of Champions 2014
Date: September 21, 2014
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is the textbook definition of a one match show and now the second or third biggest match isn’t happening. Yesterday Roman Reigns was sent to the hospital with a hernia, putting him out of action for several weeks if not months. The main event is of course Cena vs. Lesnar II (III if you count the match from two and a half years ago) with Lesnar defending his title. Let’s get to it.

Instead of a pre-show match, this month we have the return of the Peep Show. Christian is a good guy this time and says it’s all about the titles. There’s one match that has peaked his interest, even though it isn’t for a title. It features his guest tonight though: Chris Jericho. There’s no jacket yet but Chris sucks up to the fans a bit before they get in a friendly argument over who came up with the name Vitamin C and who was the captain of the team.

Christian gets on Jericho for not wearing pants on his show before showing us a clip from Raw where Orton attacked Jericho to set up their match tonight. Christian calls Orton HHH’s lapdog, hamster, lackey and various other things. Randy pops up on screen and says it’s the modern Terrance and Phillip. He says Orton beat Christian up so bad that he can’t wrestle anymore and after tonight, Jericho will only be able to appear on Total Divas. Jericho says that’s a perfect set up for Orton’s show: Total Jackass. Chris lists off some snake killer names and that’s about it.

The opening video has the theme of a belt being made and of course focuses on Cena vs. Lesnar. That’s a cool concept and it worked well.

As they’re introducing the matches tonight, we see pictures of people who have held the titles before.

Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos

The Usos are defending and Jey is just getting over a knee injury in a match against the challengers which set up this match. Goldust and Jey get things going with the champ sending the veteran down. Off to Jimmy for a running forearm in the corner, sending Goldust off to tag his brother. Stardust gets slammed down as well and a hard whip sends him into the corner.

Back to Jey for the armbar but Stardust takes him into the corner for the heels to take over. Stardust starts in on the bad leg as Lawler emphasizes titles only changing hands on a pinfall or submission. Jey rolls over and tags in his brother for a big uppercut, sending Goldust rolling out to the floor. Jimmy dives onto Stardust but Goldust gets in a powerslam to take over. Back in and Goldust puts on a chinlock on Jimmy. It doesn’t last long but a spinebuster puts Jimmy down for two.

Stardust gets the same off a neckbreaker and the Dusts stay in control. Jimmy busts up a chinlock with a jawbreaker to Stardust before sending him shoulder first into the post. A spinning kick to the head drops Goldust and the hot tag brings in Jey. Everything breaks down and Jey hits some nice dives onto the Dusts before the running Umaga attack crushes Stardust in the corner.

Young Dust pops back up and nails Dark Matter for two before tying Jey in the ropes. Stardust takes off his glove and slaps Jey for some reason, earning him a huge dive over the top to the floor. All four guys are down on the floor before Jimmy sends Stardust back inside for the Superfly Splash, only to hit knees to give Stardust the pin and the titles at 12:50.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t bad and it’s a solid choice for an opener but I’m not sure where the champions go from here. They’re so completely away from what they were that got them over in the first place that they don’t really have anywhere to go. Granted it’s not that it matters given that the Ascension are on the horizon.

Dolph Ziggler and R-Ziggler say Dolph is ready for his title defense tonight and Miz will never work in this town again.

US Title: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

Sheamus is defending and Cesaro won a #1 contenders match here. Feeling out process to start with Sheamus taking him to the mat and then ramming him face first into the buckle. The rollnig fireman’s carry gets two but Cesaro comes back with an ax handle to the head. Sheamus gets tired of this wrestling stuff and double legs Cesaro to hammer away. They head outside with Sheamus getting the better of it before getting two off the battering ram.

Sheamus goes up top but gets uppercutted out to the floor in a big crash. Back in and we hit the sleeper on Sheamus but the champion quickly fights out, only to get nailed with a hard clothesline for two. The champ comes back with a pair of Irish Curses for two of his own. Cesaro makes the mistake of rolling to the apron and gets caught with about five forearms to the chest. He quickly escapes and nails a forearm and big boot to the head, only to go up top and get slammed down for two.

The Brogue Kick misses and the big uppercut gets two for Cesaro. Sheamus comes back with a powerslam and the champion is all fired up. The Brogue Kick misses and a rollup gets two for Cesaro. The Neutralizer is countered but Cesaro lands on his feet. Sheamus loads up another Brogue but Cesaro gets underneath him for something resembling a backwards Angle Slam for a VERY close two.

Sheamus is down on his knees where Cesaro slaps him in the face. The champ is all BRING IT ON so Cesaro hits a running boot to the face and hammers away with rights and lefts in the corner. The referee pulls him away like he should, setting up the Brogue Kick for the pin to retain at 13:21.

Rating: B-. Take two big power brawlers and let them beat the tar out of each other for awhile. We’ve seen this match a few times before but at least it’s something good every single time. Neither guy really has anything going for him right now so pushing Sheamus makes as much sense as taking the title off him. That’s not a good thing.

Big Show gives Mark Henry a pep talk and says there are 308 million people in his corner. He gives Henry some American themed gear and tells him to tear Rusev’s head off.

Country band Florida Georgia Line comes out for commentary and says they’ll be at Tribute to the Troops.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is challenging and these two have traded the title for the last month or so. They fight over a top wristlock to start as the regular announcers suck up to the band. Ziggler tries a Thesz Press but Miz rolls away to avoid being hit in the face. The ten elbow drops have Miz in trouble but he pops up and nails a big boot for two. A boot to a seated Dolph gets two and we hit the chinlock.

Miz walks around and stomps Ziggler a few times as the announcers keep focusing on the band. This is WCW level stuff. Ziggler blocks the running corner clothesline with a clothesline of his own and both guys are down. A Stinger Splash sets up a neckbreaker for two on Miz and a sunset flip gets the same. They fall out to the floor where Mizdow sends Dolph into the apron before beating up R-Ziggler as well.

Mizdow laughs at Florida Georgia Line so they shove him down. The stunt doubles run to the back and Ziggler gets two off a superkick back inside. The Fameasser is countered into the Figure Four but Dolph finally crawls over to the rope. He pops back up with the Fameasser for two and both guys are down. Back up and Ziggler tries a rollup but Miz rolls through and grabs the trunks for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Rating: C. You know, if you ignored all the stupid band stuff on commentary and the stunt doubles and cameras staying on commentary, you might have seen part of a pretty good match. Miz winning the title makes me smile as I’ve really been digging this Hollywood character lately. The Florida Georgia Line stuff was just stupid and WWE shouting “PAY ATTENTION TO US TMZ!”

Video on Reigns’ injury that aired on the Network yesterday. Reigns is shown in his bed and talking about his hernia. We also hear from the doctor who talks about how severe it was.

Here’s Seth Rollins for some gloating. One day you’re on top of the world and the next you’re Roman Reigns. Reigns is in a hospital but emergency surgery is no reason to not show up here tonight. However, in the interest of justice, Reigns has a ten count to make it to the ring. The referee rings the bell and counts as the fans chant for Ambrose.

We get to ten and Rollins is named winner by forfeit. Rollins insists that his hand be raised and says that he knows the people wanted to see him compete tonight. He’s disappointed that Reigns isn’t the man Rollins thought he was, but he’s also willing to give someone a chance. Rollins issues an open challenge for a match right now. You should know what’s coming from a mile away.

Dean Ambrose arrives in a cab (and the camera misses him getting out) and immediately takes Rollins into the crowd. There was no bell so this is just a brawl instead of a match for now. Dean hammers him through the crowd and backdrops his way out of a piledriver attempt. HHH sends out security to break it up but Ambrose dives off part of the set to take him down.

They head into another part of the crowd with Dean hammering away before clotheslining Seth back to ringside. Rollins tries to run but Dean picks up a chair. Security saves Rollins again and Dean has his hands tied. They carry him out with Dean swearing vengeance. The Authority leaves together. This was about all they could have done with Reigns being gone.

The expert panel (Renee, Booker T., Big Show and Alex Riley) recap the evening and make some basic predictions.

Rusev vs. Mark Henry

Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem before the match and Henry starts crying. Henry wins the early slugout and Rusev bails to the floor. They do the same sequence again but Henry follows him out the third time. Rusev drives him into the steps to take over before hitting a running splash back inside. He puts on a side choke and things slow down a bit.

Back up and Henry hits a quick splash in the corner but can’t lift him for the World’s Strongest Slam. Rusev nails a spinwheel kick and starts in on the bad back. Henry fights out of an Accolade attempt and nails the World’s Strongest Slam out of nowhere but his back gives out. Rusev wisely rolls outside but comes back in with the running superkick. Now the Accolade goes on and Henry quickly taps at 8:35.

Rating: D. That was pretty much exactly what was expected and it really wasn’t anything interesting. No one gave Henry much of a chance here and can you really blame them? At the end of the day the Hall of Pain period was such an outlier in his career as the rest of his career has been such a mess.

We look at Lesnar’s sitdown interview from earlier this week where he says he’s here to fight.

Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho

This is the result of Orton attacking Jericho a few weeks back. They start fast with Jericho nailing a dropkick and clotheslining Orton out to the floor. Back in and Orton charges into some boots in the corner but manages to crotch Jericho on top. A superplex drops Jericho and we hit the chinlock. They head outside again with Jericho being dropped back first onto the barricade.

Jericho gets thrown over the announcers’ table for two and we’re back to the chinlock. Back up and Jericho nails a shoulder for two but walks into a powerslam for the same. The RKO is countered into a bulldog and the Lionsault gets two. Orton escapes a Walls attempt and sends Jericho shoulder first into the post.

The Punt misses and Jericho gets two off a rollup before putting on the Walls. Orton gets pulled back to the middle of the ring but he slips through the legs and kicks Jericho back to the floor. The Elevated DDT plants Chris but he counters the RKO into a Codebreaker for two. Jericho takes forever to get up top and dives into the RKO for the pin at 16:19.

Rating: B+. This was a really solid match which surprised me by the end. I don’t think the ending was really in doubt but at least they gave us an awesome match to make up for it. Odds are Jericho leaves for awhile after this and I can’t say I’m complaining. He’s getting up there in years and you can only put over so many people before it loses some of its appeal.

Paige narrates the recap video about the triple threat. Nothing much to say here: AJ and Paige have been feuding since April and Nikki is here to promote Total Divas.

Brie says Nikki shouldn’t become champion because she’ll become even more obnoxious.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella vs. Paige

Paige is defending. Nikki (with something resembling cornrows in part of her hair) bumps chests with the champion to start but AJ speeds things up to take over. Nikki sends AJ out to the floor and grabs a cross armbreaker on Paige. The champion fights up but AJ pulls her to the floor. AJ gets two on Paige off a spinwheel kick but Nikki comes back in to pull some hair. Paige kicks her to the floor and hugs AJ to her feet, only to nail her in the face.

Some headbutts get two on AJ until Nikki comes back in and beats up AJ a bit more. She catches AJ’s cross body but gets countered into the Black Widow. Paige makes the save and loads up a superplex until Nikki makes it a Tower of Doom. Why Nikki is down as well isn’t clear. AJ it sent to the floor but comes back in to break up a pin after Nikki’s Rack. Nikki yells at her until AJ tosses her back outside. The less annoying ones go inside again where AJ grabs the Black Widow to make AJ submit at 8:45.

Rating: C-. We’ll call this a pleasant surprise as Nikki isn’t champion and that means this is a good day. Hopefully this winds up being like last year where they tease one of the Total Divas winning forever but never actually pull the trigger. Nikki is watchable in the ring but the story with her sister just kills anything they do.

We get a by the numbers look at Lesnar vs. Cena from Summerslam.

Expert panel on the main event.

We recap the World Title match. Lesnar destroyed Cena at Summerslam so Cena has gotten all aggressive to have a chance at getting the title back tonight. Heyman has been trying to get him to embrace the hate and it went about as well as you would expect.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

They have over half an hour for this. Cena charges again and is immediately taken into the corner for shoulders to the ribs. Brock tries a German but Cena grabs the ropes and drops Lesnar with a clothesline. The AA gets one after forty seconds but Brock grabs the Kimura. Cena is in the ropes so Brock fires in some hard knees to the ribs. There’s the first German suplex but Cena comes back with right hands, only to get caught in another Kimura. John is right next to the ropes though and the hold is quickly broken.

Another knee to the ribs puts Cena down and a third Kimura sends Cena running to the ropes. The second suplex gets two and Brock busts out Three Amigos but Cena’s shoulders aren’t down. Brock drives some shoulders into the ribs but Cena scores with some rights and lefts. Not that they matter as Lesnar takes his head off with a clothesline. Back to the Kimura with the same result as Cena grabs the arm.

An overhead belly to belly gets two for the champion and he shrugs off more punches. Cena comes back again with rights hands and a great looking elbow to the jaw to stun Brock for a bit. The AA is countered into yet another German though and Lesnar has a bloody nose. Cena has a big bruise on his left kidney. Brock takes the gloves off and drives Cena into the buckle for even more shoulders to the ribs. Another AA connects out of nowhere for two and Lesnar is actually in trouble.

The F5 is countered and Cena grabs the STF but Lesnar easily separates the arms and puts on another Kimura. Cena powers to his feet and rams Lesnar into the buckle a few times to escape. The third AA sets up another STF and Cena drags it back to the middle of the ring. He does it again and Heyman is starting to freak out. Cena picks him up for a fourth AA but Rollins runs in with the briefcase for the DQ at 14:02.

Rating: B+. This was a much better match but the ending really drags it down. However this gives us a reason for a third match in the Cell because Cena knows he can beat him. It’s good storytelling but I don’t like this as a way to end a pay per view. They did a good job of making Lesnar seem closer to human though and that makes for great drama.

A briefcase to Cena’s head sends him to the floor and Lesnar is out. Rollins takes forever to turn around but he plants Lesnar with a Curb Stomp. He cashes in but Cena picks Rollins off before we get a bell. So there’s no cash in. Lesnar lays out Cena with an F5 and holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’d call this show a pleasant surprise. As usual there’s hope for the future but I’m not sure how much they’re actually going to follow up on this. Cena vs. Rollins for a month before we put these two inside the Cell is fine, but I’d like to see ANYONE else get in there instead of Cena for awhile. Not that Cena vs. Lesnar is a bad match, but spread the wealth a bit. It’s a good show but the interest level is still really low.

Results

Goldust/Stardust b. Usos – Stardust pinned Jimmy after a missed Superfly Splash

Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick

Miz b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Rusev b. Mark Henry – Accolade

Randy Orton b. Chris Jericho – RKO

AJ Lee b. Paige and Nikki Bella – Black Widow to Paige

John Cena b. Brock Lesnar via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I have a feeling this is going to be a shorter one as most of the matches are fairly obvious, meaning there isn’t much to say about them. That’s a bad sign too as most of the matches haven’t had a ton of effort put into them and it really isn’t all that hard to guess most of them. WWE has done a very bad job of setting up this show other than the main event and it’s going to catch up to them. Let’s get to it.

There hasn’t been a pre-show match but the rumor is the Bunny/Rose vs. Slater/O’Neil. I can live with this, but they better nail the unmasking. The rumor of Darren Young would be about as big of a letdown as you could ask for.

The main event is the only match that matters here and WWE has done a good job of making me believe Cena could pull it off. At the end of the day though, I’m hoping Lesnar holds onto the title. If not, it’s a pretty big waste of Brock’s huge push, especially when Cena doesn’t really have anyone other than Rusev to fight with. I’ll go with a double DQ though to set up the showdown in the Cell.

Since Reigns is out with the surgery, I’m hoping they go with the obvious idea of Rollins giving an open challenge and Ambrose returning for the big showdown. I’m not sure if Reigns’ condition is legit or not, but man alive it’s convenient that they did Rollins vs. Reigns on Monday, right before Ambrose is due back.

Cesaro takes the US Title, though I have no idea what he does with it.

I’d like to see Miz take the title as he’s doing very well with the character. That being said, he isn’t going any higher with it. I wouldn’t mind seeing Breeze debuting with the entourage soon though.

Unfortunately, odds are Nikki walks out with the title because for some reason the Bellas are the second biggest act on the card right now, despite the interest just not being there. Oh wait it’s to get 14 people to watch Total Divas or vice versa. I’m so glad we get to deal with this stuff. Did I mention I REALLY hate this story?

Rusev beats Henry. Duh.

I’ll take the brothers to walk out with the Tag Team Titles. I mean the brothers who paint their faces. Gah this is annoying. The Dusts win the titles and maybe we finally find out what the Cosmic Key is.

Orton beats Jericho. Does ANYONE care about this match?

Night of Champions is one of the least interesting cards I’ve seen in a very long time. This company just has no energy anymore and hasn’t since Summerslam was over. WWE has put in almost no effort to the show and it’s clear that they’re not interested in trying hard for this one. This is the really bad fall lull and we’ve got a few more months of it to go before things start getting better. Maybe some of the NXT guys can breathe life into the company but I wouldn’t bet on it right now. Lesnar vs. Cena should be good though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 1, 2014
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s Labor Day and we’ve got less than three weeks before Night of Champions. The main stories for tonight are the return of some needed big names like Jericho and Orton. Last week made it clear that they didn’t have the talent pool to fill a three hour show so those two should help things out a little bit. Also tonight we get Cena’s response to Lesnar and Heyman’s promo last week. Let’s get to it.

We open with Chris Jericho in the ring for the Highlight Reel. JBL is already over him, talking over Jericho’s lines about how bored he is. Jericho is glad to be in Des Moines. “I love those cheap pops!” His guest tonight is someone who has been given everything he’s ever had in WWE: Randy Orton. Instead he gets HHH, Kane, Rollins and Orton, all in suits. Jericho calls Kane Jaws (James Bond reference) but HHH says Jericho is the man who never grew up. “Figuratively and literally.”

Jericho references Stephanie getting arrested and wants to know why HHH is wearing a pink tie. HHH insists it’s violet and talks about watching Lesnar vs. Cena from Summerslam over and over. After seeing how brutal it was on Cena, he was thinking of giving someone else a title shot at Night of Champions. Orton says it’s him, and reminds Chris that he’s earned everything in WWE. Kane and Rollins both suggest themselves, with Rollins getting a very nice reaction as the hometown boy. Jericho thinks he should get the shot, but here’s serious Cena to interrupt.

Cena isn’t cool with people saying he can’t win just because some Hall of Famers thought he can’t beat Lesnar. People didn’t think he could beat HHH at Wrestlemania XXII but he made him tap out. Cena invoked his rematch clause and HHH approved it, so now if HHH changes things, he’s facing a lawsuit. If that happens, Cena will be the COO and fire HHH as a result. HHH is amazed to hear Cena threatening lawsuits and says he’s trying to prevent Cena from going over the edge.

He knows his job and knows what being COO means. HHH can’t let Cena get hurt again, but Rollins and Orton both imply they can beat Lesnar. Jericho brings up Reigns beating Orton at Summerslam but Randy says he could lay out Reigns right now. Cue Reigns of course to tell Orton to drop him right now. Roman says he belongs in the title hunt so HHH makes a six man tag for a chance to prove themselves, whatever that means. Rollins tries to nail Reigns and gets punched in the jaw.

Miz/Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus

The villains have Sandow and some chick at ringside with them. Cesaro uppercuts Ziggler in the face and drops ten elbows of his own for no cover. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick but goes after Miz, sending him running to the floor. Miz sits in a chair while Sandow gives him water and the girl checks on Miz’s makeup. The movie star comes in but gets caught in a Thesz Press, sending him running away from the right hands.

Sheamus chases him to the floor and tries some right hands, sending Miz running back into the ring. Miz actually fights back with some left hands, but you know Sheamus is fine with a brawl. He ties Miz up in the ropes for the forearms but Cesaro sneaks in with a cheap shot as we take a break.

Back with Miz on the floor getting cleaned up and Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock but getting slapped in the face. He gets all fired up but has to get rid of Miz, allowing Cesaro to take him down with a fall away slam. Sheamus comes back with the middle rope shoulder and a double tag brings in Ziggler and Miz.

Dolph cleans house but the Fameasser is countered into a powerbomb. Ziggler counters that into a sunset flip and hits a running DDT for two. The power guys fall outside again but Miz runs from a Zig Zag attempt. He “tags” Sandow who goes in and takes the Zig Zag, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin on Dolph at 10:53.

Rating: C. The wrestling was fine but I’m digging Miz’s character more and more every week. They’re actually thinking with it and allowing him to use some of the stuff involved to make it even better. Having a makeup girl and stunt double are great ideas and something that a guy like him would have. The pin here wasn’t clean so it takes away some of the sting. Good stuff.

In case you somehow forgot it, here’s the Bellas’ segment from last week.

Now we get a segment called Growing Up Bella with Nikki talking about going to the prom with a guy she had liked for years. She saved up for months to buy the dress but Brie stole her date. Nikki has never told this to anyone so it must be very painful for her.

Rosa Mendes/Cameron/Eva Marie vs. Layla/Summer Rae/Naomi

The fans start a Randy Savage chant as the announcers tell us about 18 times that Total Divas season 3 debuts this Sunday. Layla and Rosa have a slow motion match to start but Cameron makes the save. A brawl breaks out and it’s a double DQ at 1:00.

We look at Rollins and Kane taking out Ambrose but not being able to do the same to Reigns last week.

Mark Henry/Big Show vs. Wyatt Family

They keep pushing the combined weight in this match, even though it’s the same weight as the other two times we’ve seen these teams fight. Henry runs Rowan over to start and sends him hard into the corner. Mark actually gets on the bottom rope to hammer away before splashing Erick in the other corner. The fans chant Sexual Chocolate as the slow beating continues. Harper breaks up a Vader Bomb attempt, allowing Rowan to knock him off the middle rope. A big boot gets two for Harper and we take a break.

Back with Henry and Rowan both trying big boots at the same time before it’s back to Harper for some choking. Lana and Rusev come out for a distraction as Henry gets up an elbow in the corner. The lukewarm tag brings in Big Show to clean house but he goes outside and gets tripped into the barricade. Show barely beats the count back in but Harper kicks him down for two.

Rowan does his head vice for a bit before it’s back to Harper for some shots to the face. A superkick gets two and Rowan slams Big Show with ease. Show gets in a shot of his own and makes the tag to Henry. House is cleaned again and everything breaks down. Big Show and Rowan fight to the announcers’ table but Rusev comes in for the DQ at 11:21.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here, especially when you consider we’ve seen this match two times in the last few weeks, not counting the six man from last week. That’s one of WWE’s biggest problems: they keep airing matches over and over again and don’t understand why interest goes down every time.

Big Show clears the ring with a chair.

More Growing Up Bella, this time with Nikki talking about getting her driver’s license and having to drive Brie everywhere in the used car they were given by their grandmother. Then Brie stole the car and Nikki’s license and got in a wreck. Nikki got the blame because it was her license. Again, she’s never told anyone about this.

Michael Sam, the first openly gay NFL draft pick, has been given an invitation to Raw next week.

We look back at Lesnar vs. Cena, Lesnar and Heyman’s promo from last week, and Cena going nuts last week.

Here’s Heyman to talk about Cena overreacting since his loss. We get stills from Summerslam with Heyman talking about how Cena has stopped listening to reason. Cena can fight as hard as he wants, but you can take the entire locker room and multiply them by infinity and it won’t be as brutal as Lesnar at Night of Champions.

Jack Swagger vs. Curtis Axel

Colter is back. Swagger runs Axel over to start and WE THE PEOPLE, only to get hit in the ribs. Bo Dallas pops up on the stage with three chairs behind him. Axel hits a clothesline to the back of Swagger’s head as Dallas has two men and a woman from the crowd come sit in the chairs. Curtis dropkicks Swagger to the floor but Jack comes right back with the Patriot Lock for the submission at 2:30.

Post match Dallas introduces the three people who are all crushed by Swagger losing at Summerslam. One of the men is a farmer who bet $1000 on Swagger and then bet double or nothing on the rematch. Now the government is taking his farm. Next up is an immigrant that failed his citizenship test and is being deported back to Italy. Colter looks thrilled at that one. Next up is a woman whose son has been crushed by the loss. After the loss, her son wants to be like Vladimir Putin. All three agree to Bolieve.

Adam Rose vs. Titus O’Neil

Adam rolls around on the mat to start but Titus picks him up for a hard backbreaker. The bunny hops over to Slater and gets shoved down. Titus isn’t sure what to think but the bunny double legs Slater and beats the carrots out of him. Rose wins with a rollup at 1:51.

More Growing Up Bella. This time it’s about Brie barely graduating high school until Nikki took her exams for her.

The announcers hype up Attitude Week on the WWE Network.

Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Lana makes fun of Labor Day before we get going. Ryder hammers away but the Rough Ryder is caught in a fall away slam. The jumping superkick sets up the Accolade for the submission at 0:54.

Post match Henry chases Rusev off. Henry says he’s scared of what he’d do if he got his hands on Rusev. Mark has opened an international wing of the Hall of Pain and Rusev is going to be the first inductee.

Stephanie says she can relate to the Growing Up Bella stories and says her door is always open for employees with problems. HHH is amused by this and says Stephanie is always helping people. Apparently they have an announcement for Nikki.

Here’s Stephanie to bring out Nikki for a chat. The fans are already calling this boring. Stephanie says the people know what it’s like to be in the shadow of those greater than them. Nikki has been through so much so Stephanie is making her #1 contender for the Divas Title.

This brings out Brie but Stephanie cuts the music, saying it now belongs to Nikki alone. Brie wants to know if this is what Nikki has wanted all along. Nikki says that it’s about her for once and that she sees right through everything Brie is doing. She can’t wait for Bryan to see it too. Nikki is going to be the next Divas Champions and the Bella that everyone is talking about.

This brings out AJ Lee to try to save this thing. AJ points out that there is only one contender and she never got a rematch. This brings out Paige who says there’s one thing missing from this talk about the Divas Title: the bloody Divas Champion. Nikki has a solution to this whole thing: she’ll forgive Brie if Brie will quit.

Brie looks annoyed so Nikki tells her to go back to the hole she and Bryan share in Washington to have troll babies. She screams at Brie that if she loves Nikki she’ll leave, but Brie pushes Nikki down, right into Paige. Brie leaves and the fans chant YES. AJ picks up the title but Stephanie tells her to hand it over….and AJ does just that.

Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage is made for next week.

Bray wants to know how far a rat will go to outrun a serpent. Inside the cage, Jericho won’t be able to run.

Jimmy Uso vs. Goldust

The Dusts try to apologize for their actions but the Usos will have none of it. Jimmy takes Goldust down to start and hits a quick Samoan drop. The running Umaga attack connects and there’s the superkick but Stardust puts his brother’s foot on the ropes. The injured Jey goes after Stardust but gets kicked in the leg. Jimmy dives on Stardust, allowing Goldust to kick Jimmy in the head. The Final Cut gets the pin on Jimmy at 2:14.

Stardust crushes Jey’s bad leg against the post with a chair.

We look at Ambrose getting hurt again. Cole makes sure to point out that Kane and Rollins planned to have the blocks there. We also see Reigns fighting off both Authority members.

Preview of the new season of Total Divas, focusing on the Bellas of course.

Big Show congratulates Henry on chasing Rusev off but wants him to remember the team. Henry says he won’t, but he has to get Rusev. Show offers to be in his corner but Henry needs to do this by himself.

Chris Jericho/John Cena/Roman Reigns vs. Kane/Randy Orton/Seth Rollins

HHH and Stephanie are at ringside. Reigns and Orton get things going with Roman quickly winning a slugout. A big clothesline drops Randy but Reigns pulls Rollins into the ring instead. Seth bails outside and we take a break. Back with Reigns hitting a Samoan drop for two on Orton. Rollins comes in with a shot to Reigns’ head for two and we hit the chinlock. Off to Kane for a chinlock of his own as the fans are getting restless.

Back to Randy who stomps Reigns’ head for two and kicks him down to the mat. Reigns finally gets in a clothesline but the hot tag brings in Jericho to face Rollins. The Lionsault has Rollins in trouble and there are the Walls, only to have Orton make a save. There’s a Superman Punch for Randy but Kane comes in with a chokeslam. Cena AA’s Kane, only to take the springboard knee from Seth. Jericho rolls up Rollins for two but gets kicked in the head. A Codebreaker puts Rollins down and we take a break.

We come back to Jericho fighting out of a chinlock but Rollins sends him into the corner. Rollins hits a running forearm to put the Canadian down and goes up top. Jericho pops up though and dropkicks Seth out of the air in a nice counter. Kane breaks up a hot tag attempt and puts on a chinlock of his own.

Jericho fights to his feet but dives into an uppercut for two. Orton can’t superplex Chris and gets knocked off the top, setting up a high cross body for two. Kane breaks up yet another tag attempt but Jericho nails him with a forearm and makes the real hot tag to Cena (BIG reaction for that). John cleans house and hits an AA on Kane before tagging out to Reigns for the spear and the pin at 22:54.

Rating: C+. This was the standard long match to end a bad show. Cena not getting to come in until the very end was a nice idea and let him explode all at once. Kane taking the fall was pretty clear and there’s nothing wrong with that. This was nothing special though and felt like a house show main event more than anything else.

Cena gets in HHH’s face and AA’s Rollins through the table.

Ads for Michael Sam, Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage and Orton vs. Reigns close the show. Did I mention Monday Night Football is back next week?

Overall Rating: D. And that’s being generous. Ignoring how horrible the Bellas’ story and acting has been, there was WAY too much focus on that one story all night. This show basically had three stories on it: the Bellas, the World Title and Henry vs. Rusev. The rest was almost all window dressing and that makes for a very long three hours. The show is just so uninteresting right now and the Bellas are a huge part of it. Inviting Michael Sam and then showing his picture on a graphic that says NEXT WEEK is there to deceive people rather than entertain them. It makes the company look lost and that’s not good. Horrible show.

Results
Miz/Cesaro b. Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler – Skull Crushing Finale to Ziggler
Rosa Mendes/Cameron/Eva Marie vs. Layla/Summer Rae/Naomi went to a double DQ when all six started brawling
Mark Henry/Big Show b. Wyatt Family via DQ when Rusev interfered
Jack Swagger b. Curtis Axel – Patriot Lock
Adam Rose b. Titus O’Neil – Rollup
Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade
Goldust b. Jimmy Uso – Final Cut
John Cena/Roman Reigns/Chris Jericho b. Kane/Seth Rollins/Randy Orton – Spear to Kane

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WWE is in an interesting place right now as they’re coming off the great Summerslam show and have Brock Lesnar on top, but the question now is what do they do with him? The Cena rematch is the only option and it’s what we’re getting, but how do you get people to pay for the rematch of a horrible beatdown? Raw is the attempt to start that process. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the Hall of Fame forum and this was a mess. It came off like three old guys just chattering and didn’t really get any point across. Basically only Hogan thinks Cena has a chance in the rematch but they all love him. The best thing that can be said about this is Flair didn’t embarrass himself, which is a rare sight (though he’s been on better behavior as of late).

Cena came out near the end and did his serious voice about how he’s ready for the rematch, though it’s about the norm for him. I’m not sure what they can do for Night of Champions that they didn’t do for Summerslam, but the question of how Cena can make this one closer might be enough to work. I’ll give them this: they’re making me have more sympathy for Cena, which seems to be the goal.

Nitro is coming to the Network. All this does is make me mad that it wasn’t available when I was reviewing the old episodes.

Rusev beat Swagger via referee stoppage in another entertaining match. I like what I’m seeing with Swagger, but someone is going to have to explain the idea behind pushing him by having him lose every match. At least he isn’t tapping anymore. Bo Dallas mocked Swagger after the break to get us to the real point of the thing.

Cesaro beat RVD in a quick match to become #1 contender for the US Title. Why this wasn’t the Summerslam match is beyond me. Cesaro vs. Sheamus should be good. I know this because I’ve seen them fight 384 times.

Paige finally beat Natalya, thereby making the previous losses look worthless. Post match Paige came out and did the semi-lesbian stuff which won’t go anywhere but will spawn a million fanfics.

Kane and Rollins eulogized Dean Ambrose. There wasn’t much to this but it served as a way to get Roman Reigns vs. Rollins started. Reigns broke things up to defend Dean’s honor and got a handicap match as a result, because that’s what the Authority does in WWE.

The Usos lost to the Dusts via countout due to Jimmy banging up his knee. The Dusts turned heel in a post match beatdown on the injured Uso. Those two as heels actually works and will make the promos sound a lot less comical. Also it gives the twins a team to feud with other than the Wyatts, which they’ve been lacking for a good while. How have the Usos been champions for six months? It seems like they just got them.

Lesnar and Heyman did a pretaped promo on Cena. The pretapes are a good idea to keep Lesnar on TV without paying a fortune.

Dolph Ziggler beat Damien Mizdow in a short match. Just story advancement for the next match with Miz.

Now we get to the big segment of the night as the Bellas had a sitdown interview. Brie tried to make up but Nikki (in a skin tight black dress) said every stupid thing she could think of about Brie, ranging from Brie stealing her boyfriends to Brie has an ugly husband to wishing Brie died in the womb. Nikki then shoves Brie down as Brie cried and slapped Jerry Lawler off camera.

The segment, as you can imagine, was cringe worthy. The Bellas can’t act and the things Nikki was saying were more laughable than emotional. Who cares that Brie did something when they were like 15? Stay on the point about Brie abandoning Nikki because there’s an actual story there. Have Brie explain it and then Nikki can be all irrational. In other words, TELL A DECENT STORY. The fans still won’t care, but there would be less to complain about. The blowoff match is going to be horrible.

Roman Reigns beat up Kane and Rollins until Seth brought in the briefcase for the DQ. They tried a Curb Stomp on more cinder blocks but Reigns beat then up again, sending Rollins running scared.

Los Matadores beat Slater and O’Neil. The losers had issues after the match and there’s a slight hint of Slater turning face. Again, I’ve heard worse ideas.

Bo Dallas beat Kofi and then got beaten up by Swagger. More story advancement.

Then we get to the part of the show that got on my nerves worst. Cena basically squashed Bray Wyatt before the Wyatts saved their leader. Then Cena squashed the whole Wyatt Family while Big Show and Mark Henry were in the same general area. Of all the people they have on the roster, Cena had to beat up Bray like that? You can’t put him in there with Harper or Rowan in the first place and have one of them get beaten up that badly? It’s the point of having lackeys: you can keep the big name from taking that big of a beating.

This goes to show you how thin the top of the roster is right now. The heels are all with the Authority and there really isn’t anyone outside of the Wyatts that you can put in this spot. Del Rio would have been perfect, but with him goen, there really was just Bray and company. WWE might have to, gulp, elevate someone before this becomes a bigger problem. Odds are that won’t happen though because WWE.

Raw wasn’t very good on Monday and a lot of that is due to how thin the roster is. With the Authority, Jericho, Ambrose and Orton all gone for the week, the wrestling was a lot thinner than it should have been. They really need some fresh blood at this point and the people are there to elevate if they would ever freaking do it. Unfortunately they seem terrified of that concept and the show gets stale in a hurry.

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WWE is coming off the pretty awesome Summerslam pay per view and the question now is where do we go from here. Night of Champions is in five weeks and in theory we’re coming up on Brock vs. Cena III. It’s hard to say how Cena is going to do, but there’s a chance that Cena is going to get the title back already and I can see why they would go that route. Let’s get to it.

In what almost has to be a rib, Stephanie (again looking gorgeous in jeans and a tight t-shirt) started the show to talk about Brie Bella. This led to Stephanie bringing out Nikki Bella to explain why she turned on her sister. It’s exactly what you would expect: she was angry at Brie for making everything about herself and abandoning her. Brie came out and did the big heartfelt plea to her sister and got slapped in the face for her efforts. In case you didn’t get this, don’t worry as this would air FOUR TIMES on Monday.

Here’s the thing and I’ve said it several times before: the majority of the fans do not care about the Bellas fighting over whatever their issue is. The match is going to be a disaster and the promos are going to be even worse, but the worst part is that this opened the show. With everything else that happened at Summerslam, this is what opened Monday Night Raw. Is it any shock that the ratings were down this week?

Big Show/Mark Henry beat the Wyatt Family in a pretty good power match. Erick Rowan slammed Big Show in a very impressive power display. Other than that this was the usual back and forth match that you would expect with Henry World’s Strongest Slamming Rowan for the pin. In theory this sets up the giants vs. the Usos and eventually Henry vs. Big Show because that’s how tag team wrestling works.

Ric Flair had a cameo with Dolph Ziggler. As long as that’s the extent of their association, I’m fine.

Seth Rollins was bragging about winning the lumberjack match but Dean Ambrose poured a bucket of ice water over his head. Ambrose: “It’s for charity!” A brawl ensued but didn’t go anywhere. After the break, the Authority made Rollins vs. Ambrose again for tonight with the fans picking the stipulations.

AJ cost Paige a win over Natalya (now wearing shorts) because that’s the only thing the writers know how to do.

The big segment of the show was HHH bringing out Lesnar and Heyman to present Brock with the new WWE World Title belt. Heyman’s promo was the usual awesome performance where he talked about Cena being a tough guy and THE guy for the last ten years, only to have him lose to Brock on Sunday. Lesnar conquered Brock Lesnar just like he should have done. Nothing much to say here but it was as good as you would expect it to be.

The Miz beat Dolph Ziggler via countout in a rematch for the Intercontinental Title. This seems to set up another match between them, but it’s nothing I want to see again.

Cesaro beat Jack Swagger in a short but intense match. The idea here is that Swagger is disappointing himself after his loss on Sunday. Bo Dallas came out post match and told Swagger to Bo-Lieve. I can dig Swagger vs. Dallas.

Jericho is still talking about Wyatt. A third match with a gimmick wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world.

RVD/Reigns/Sheamus beat Ryback/Axel/Orton. Again it seems like we’re setting up Orton vs. Reigns II with a gimmick and that’s not the worst idea in the world. Reigns didn’t get the pin for some reason, which you would think would be the right idea on a match like this. The only interesting thing in the match was Ryback getting a big hometown pop. I’d still love to see him get a nice push as a face again.

Orton threatened Flair after a break. Please, no more Flair.

Bray Wyatt declared himself the face of salvation.

Goldust/Stardust beat the Usos in a non-title match. Methinks we’re getting a multi-team match in the future.

Lana and Rusev talked and Mark Henry made the save. It’s not a good sign that they have Henry in two stories at the same time.

The main event was Ambrose vs. Rollins II in a falls count anywhere match. This was a great brawl with both guys beating the tar out of each other and a bunch of near falls. There was an insane spot with Rollins powerbombing Ambrose onto a pile of chairs for two. Kane interfered because that’s what he does anymore and cost Ambrose the match. It ended with Rollins hitting a Curb Stomp onto a conveniently placed stack of cinder blocks. The story after the show ended has Ambrose running away from medics and disappearing. It’s a way to let him make a movie because that’s more important than a hot feud on WWE TV.

Raw was a good but not great show as they set up some stuff for the next rematch PPV with gimmicks attached. Lesnar and Heyman were as awesome as ever and Heyman can more than carry the act in Lesnar’s absence. The return of Cena next week should be interesting and we get to hear some great promos along the way. This wasn’t the best followup show in the world but the fall looks so much better than last years.

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