NXT
Date: March 29, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: William Regal, Todd Grisham

It’s week….four I think of this season and this was taped last night before Raw as everyone is heading to Atlanta to make sure they get there in time I guess.  I’d bet on a lot of highlights from last night and build for Mania which is probably the right idea for tonight as it’s not like this is cutting edge stuff on this show.  Let’s get to it.

Striker brings out the rookies as you would expect him to.  I’m typing and not looking at the browser as I write this and it occurs to me that the names of these guys tell us absolutely nothing about these characters.  None of them have descriptive names or even unique ones.  That’s been a problem with the NXT rookies recently.  Novak has gold tights on now.  Is that his method of trying to look different other than those off-white ones he usually wears?

Young has seven points and O’Neil has five which is all that is listed.  Tonight: arm wrestling.  Oh dear.  The fans are restless to say the least.  This is for four points.  The person that wins their first round match in the fastest time gets a bye to the finals.  Young vs. Saxton goes to Young in 23.7 seconds.  The fans are looking like they’re getting a reading of War and Peace at a Guns N Roses concert.

Cannon vs. O’Brian is delayed due to Cannon sanitizing Rat Boy.  Cannon tries to cheat and is disqualified and that counts as the new time of 11.2 seconds.  Novak vs. O’Neil now and O’Neil has lost the manly purple tights.  Novak tries to cheat again and that doesn’t count but it’s not a DQ.  He started early I guess.  O’Neil massacres him and gets the best time to send him to the finals.

O’Brien beats Young to get O’Neil in the finals.  And Titus wins with only a slight issue.  O’Neil has the most redemption points now.

Six man tag later so we’re getting one match here.

Rock vs. Cena video.  Can’t argue with them pushing this.

Package on Young who says he’s not taking a step back but rather a step forward.  I still would like an answer of how a guy that was in the main event of Summerslam is in a rookie competition.

Video on Taker vs. HHH that aired last night.

We recap the Divas/Snooki/Morrison/Ziggler thing.  Oh joy: more mainstream news people trying to sound like wrestling commentators when they have no idea what a wrestling commentator sounds like.

Some R&B singer is singing America the Beautiful.  She’s not Justin Bieber so I’m happy.

Raw ReBound is Rock vs. Cena last night which it should be.  That Attitude Adjustment is going to be on more highlight reels than I can count.  But remember people, according to 411, HHH/Taker/Shawn was a bigger moment.

Speaking of said moment, it’s reaired.  It was good but they had to fit five weeks of build into one night and it didn’t work.  Shawn should be interesting on Sunday though.  This takes up about fifteen minutes but it does set up a single match as well as just about anything else could in that amount of time, especially one without a ton of build aside from “I want to break the Streak.”  The one good thing here is that I can find out what Shawn said after he said I’m sorry.  Apparently it was (to HHH) you can’t win.

Titus O’Neil/Byron Saxton/Conor O’Brian vs. Darren Young/Jacob Novak/Lucky Cannon

No entrances for anyone as I have a feeling this is going to be quick.  Cannon vs. O’Brian to start us off with O’Brian working on the arm.  Off to O’Neil as the crowd does not care at all here.  It’s hard to kill off a Chicago crowd but they’ve managed to do it.  Young comes in and gets nowhere other than into the other corner to be beaten down by Saxton.

Young tries to take over and gets kicked in the face.  Elbow puts Saxton down and it’s off to Novak.  Cannon comes in and does his DDT on the leg of Saxton and stretches him a bit.  Saxton fights back so it’s off to Young to beat him down even more.  Novak puts a chinlock on him after a brief melee and that lasts only a few seconds.  Ice cold tag to O’Neil and after he beats on them a bit, a Low Down/spinebuster ends this.  Match ran about six or seven minutes but I forgot to check the time at the end.

Rating: D. They’re trying to make O’Neil the big star this season and it’s kind of working I guess but the fans aren’t caring at all.  The problem is that this is spending 3-4 months to build up to the next season of NXT.  More or less this is a preview of it, making the whole thing six to eight months overall.  Wow this was supposed to be about the six man wasn’t it?  The match was dull with far too many chinlocks and standing around.

Overall Rating: D. What do you really want me to say here?  This was a 40 minute highlight show with arm wrestling and a six man tag.  Obviously I can’t grade it like a regular show but it was more or less 45 minutes to build Mania free so how much can you complain there?  More or less not even an NXT show but it’s not like we’re missing much.  Just a Mania commercial as expected.

Results

Titus O’Neil won the Arm Wrestling Contest

Conor O’Brian/Titus O’Neil/Byron Saxton b. Lucky Cannon/Darren Young/Jacob Novak – O’Neil pinned Novak after a sitout powerbomb

NXT
Date: March 15, 2011
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: William Regal, Todd Grisham

I don’t want to do this.  I truly and honestly don’t.  I see absolutely zero point to this show existing anymore, at least with this cast.  Jacob Novak continues to make me want to hit myself with a blunt object and yet he’s still around.  The only thing I have other than that is apparently redemption points are the tiebreakers for this season which helps a bit.  Let’s get to it.

We open with the theme song and Striker/Maryse (looking amazing in a blue dress) who introduce the pairings.  Apparently the winner also gets to pick their pro for next season.  First up is the Talk the Talk challenge.  The topic is about themselves though, taking away any entertainment value this segment has.

Novak the Uninteresting goes first and is booed before he starts.  Novak raps and it’s bad.  The fans boo the city name pop.  That says a lot.

Young is second and he goes in front of the fans.  He says with the people is where he belongs.  That’s why he stands in front of a barrier between them.  He also uses Christian’s TNA catchphrase of “if you didn’t know, now you know.”  Moderately well received.

O’Brian continues to try to be all serious and gets a better reaction by saying Kansas City.  He talks about dreams and just kind of stops talking rather than finishing if that makes sense.

Saxton talks about himself, including having a hamster named Speedy and that he loves Madden.  He makes fun of Cannon’s robe and thanks the fans for a second chance.

Cannon says he has Adonis DNA.  If that’s a Charlie Sheen reference, I may injure that person.  It’s all about him apparently.  Regal likes him.

Titus, wearing purple trunks, does his bark and says he talked to Horny earlier today and it went like this.  And then he speaks in gibberish.  The buzzer cuts him off.

Shockingly the crowd gets to pick the winner and it’s O’Neil, barely beating out Saxton.

Profile on O’Neil who says he wasn’t being himself because he’s used to everything just coming to him.

Darren Young vs. Conor O’Brian

There’s a Darren chant as we get going here.  Young controls early, hammering on O’Brian with European uppercuts in the corner.  That gets him nowhere as he gets sent shoulder first into the corner.  I haven’t heard a crowd this quiet in a very long time.  Wisely O’Brian works on the arm using a variety of stuff.  Notice that as he switches things up rather than just throwing on an armbar and going with that over and over.

Naturally as I say that, there’s the armbar.  Young fires back, naturally using the bad arm because he’s not that intelligent.  Young gets going a bit and gets O’Brian into a fireman’s carry and drops O’Brian down onto his knees in a gutbuster which I think I’ve seen Roderick Strong use before to end it at 3:00.

Rating: C. Just a match here with O’Brian using the most basic level of psychology that you can use while still calling it psychology.  This is about as formula based as you can get and while it was boring, it wasn’t bad from a technical standpoint.  This is what you’re going to get on NXT I guess though so that’s to be expected.

Keg carry later.

The Raw ReBound is an actual recap, this time being the ending with the somewhat too long beatdown by Miz on Cena.  We also get clips of the match and MizRock coming out which had me fooled for a bit actually.

After a break, Maryse is on the phone with someone and Tatsu comes up.  He tells her that she’s better than Striker but Cannon breaks it up.  This is going to be the romance of the season isn’t it?  He apologizes for being a jerk and she leaves.  Lucky says that Tatsu won’t ever get her because he’s not lucky.  Tatsu is a comedy character that is in the background most of the time and I’m far more interested in him than Cannon.

Profile on Novak which I get a good nap during.  The sounds I hear talk about him being more focused after having everything working for him last season.

Tyson Kidd/Lucky Cannon vs. Byron Saxton/Yoshi Tatsu

Well I like Tatsu and that music is as catchy so I can live with that.  Regal talks about an old fiancé having a robe like that but she had a leg shorter than the other so he was embarrassed to walk down the aisle with her.  Tatsu has a black armband on due to the earthquake/tsunami.  It’s pro vs. pro to start and we get some genuine heel cheating to give them the early advantage.  Nice to see things like that.

Solid Yoshi chant as Cannon has issues with a side salto.  I prefer Luigi but that’s just me.  Off to a body scissors now as the fans are far more into this than the previous night.  Dang it Kidd quit moving around on the apron.  Your hair was giving me perfect reception on my TV.  Tatsu runs over Cannon after being in that hold for awhile and we get the double tag.

Off to Saxton and Kidd.  Saxton works better as a face (kind of) and Cannon a bit better as a heel.  Kidd gets a kick to the head but Cannon tags himself in.  He hits Saxton with a reverse FU (same position but he slams Saxton back the way he came.  Sean O’Haire used this back in 2003 and called it the Widowmaker) to end it at 4:10.

Rating: C+. Call me crazy but this wasn’t a terrible tag match.  Cannon and Kidd were doing the most bare bones of heel work but for some reason it worked for me.  Their cheating made them the clear heels and the other guys were the faces.  That’s exactly the point and while it was short, that’s all you need to do at times.  I can live with this actually.

The Raw stuff this week is the whole Trish/Vickie/Laycool/Snooki/Ziggler/Morrison thing from last night.  I’ll spare you a bunch of complaining here.

Time for the keg carry which is a St. Patrick’s Day version this time.  Before we start though we get a video of Titus trying back in Season 2 where he fell on his face, complete with cartoon music.  Novak goes first and gets a time of 9.9.  He FLEW around the ring with those long legs.

Young is second and gets 9.8.  He’s FAR more credible with the normal looking hair.

O’Brian is third and gets 9.4.  Hokey smoke he didn’t seem to be going that fast.

Saxton is up next with Yoshi playing cheerleader.  9.5 puts him in second place.

Cannon is the next to last and Maryse has started calling him Fabio.  Instead of running, he recites a poem in what sounds like French.  Yep and it’s for Maryse.  She wants to know if she can go throw up.  I like her better as a face too.  Did everyone just get assigned the wrong character?  He touches her hair and gets slapped for his troubles.  I think he liked it.

Titus is last, complete with Horny barking.  He wins it with a time of 9.1.  Ever notice how every week someone gets to dominate?  That’s Titus this week.

Overall Rating: C. This was way better than last week but that’s not saying much when you think about it.  Still an uninteresting show with a bad cast, but sadly enough I’ll wind up getting hooked on it again.  They have this down to a formula like no other so they’re not going to change from that.  Not a terrible show but nothing we haven’t seen with the same people already.

Results

Titus O’Neil won the Talk the Talk Challenge

Darren Young b. Conor O’Brian – Double Knee Gutbuster

Tyson Kidd/Lucky Cannon b. Yoshi Tatsu/Byron Saxton – Release fireman’s carry slam

Titus O’Neil won the Keg Carry Challenge

NXT
Date: March 8, 2011
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Todd Grisham, William Regal

This is the debut of Season Five of NXT.  There has been no cast or Pros or anything like that announced yet.  All we know is that Maryse is going to be the host which was revealed/announced earlier today.  The rumor for this season was that it would be Legends with their children for this season which could be good for the older fans.  If that’s not the case I’ll edit this out.  Let’s get to it.

As the show opens you see the word “Redemption” everywhere.  Oh I have a bad feeling about this.

William Regal is now a commentator.

Striker and Maryse are now the hosts.  She introduces the Rookies.

Darren Young.  Oh dang it I was afraid of this.

Conor O’Brian

Lucky Cannon (with a big feathery robe)

Byron Saxton

Jacob Novak

Titus O’Neal

That’s it.  I have to watch these guys AGAIN?  The winner of this gets to be on NXT Season 6.  What the heck?  There’s no immunity but rather redemption points which make no sense but sounds like exactly the same thing.  Here are the Pros.

Darren Young gets Chavo Guerrero.  Chavo says Darren is good in the ring but he needs to be more aggressive.  Guerrero wants Young to get noticed.

O’Brian gets Vladimir Kozlov.  This isn’t going to go well.  He says some stuff no one can understand.

Lucky Cannon has Tyson Kidd.  What the heck are they thinking here?  Has Kidd actually won a match in the last two months?  Cannon, who is the reigning FCW Champion and a heel now, needs to be meaner.

Saxton gets Yoshi freaking Tatsu, who is in a suit.  Grisham points out the international flavor of this season.  Tatsu says Saxton needs to relax.

Novak the Worthless gets JTG.  Oh I give up.

Titus O’Neil gets Hornswoggle.  I didn’t listen to his promo/speech as I was writing up my resignation.

Novak vs. Young is up next.

Darren Young vs. Jacob Novak

Young has a haircut at least now.  They head to the floor which might have been an accident.  We hit the ropes a few times and Young gets a forearm to take him down.   Regal is a natural on commentary.  Novak with a clothesline in the corner for two so we hit the chinlock.  Young fights back which gets him nowhere for the most part as Novak hits yet another clothesline to take over.  Young hits that spinning full nelson slam to end this at 3:30.

Rating: D+. This was dull again.  Neither of these guys has anything that makes me want to watch them and I feel like I’m watching some weak indy match.  Novak continues to redefine what it means to be worthless.  Young is decent enough but again he’s not someone I would ever stop to watch.

Yoshi talks to Maryse in the back, saying she’ll be a great host.  He has something to tell her but Saxton comes up and says he’d love to talk strategy with his Pro.  She leaves and Tatsu says Saxton’s timing is no good.

Raw ReBound, which recaps the previous week’s show as Rock pretends to be a rapper.  Now we get part of Cena’s “Knockout” last night which was nowhere near his one from two weeks ago.  I still like Cena’s stuff better than Rock’s in this feud.  The aspect about Rock being in the arena once is really all the ammo Cena needs.  We also get Miz’s run in to end the show which was better than anything else in the last segment.  Thankfully this is actually a recap and not just reairing the whole thing.

Conor O’Brian talks about hiding behind a persona last season.  He talks about being poor growing up.  Why does it seem that every wrestler went through torture growing up?

There’s a Boot Camp Obstacle Course up next.

More on the Chaperone.  If I ever want to end myself it’ll be with a marathon of Legendary, Knucklehead and Chaperone.

Snooki is coming to Raw.  Dang it all.  WWE you continue to tick me off.

We do a Boot Camp Obstacle Course and first off my jaw drops at Maryse in camouflage.  I’m not a fan of her but good freaking grief she looks great here.

Titus goes first.  The course is jumping a wall, going under a net on the ground kind of thing, a balance beam, weaving through some polls and picking up a bag to carry across the finish line.  Titus gets 29.8.

Novak shatters it with 24 seconds.  There’s nothing to say here for the most part.

Saxton gets a time of 26.5.

Lucky Cannon in the pink tights, stops to say he won’t be a circus monkey this season because it’s all about him.

Conor is 5^th and gets a time of 27.1.  He stumbled at the beginning which hurt him a lot.

Young goes last and is FLYING.  He wins it with a time of 23 seconds, good for 3 Redemption Points which I’m not sure I understand.  Granted that might be because I thought they were different than Immunity Points.

We reair the majority of the Cole/JBL/Austin thing because these guys can’t have matches right?  Cole on commentary here is still absolutely awesome.  This eats up 8 minutes.

HHH will be on Smackdown.  Also Christian vs. Alberto.

Saxton says he’ll take less for granted because it’s his last chance.

Lucky Cannon vs. Titus O’Neil

After about a minute of jokes about the robe we’re ready to go.  Titus hammers him away in the corner but gets sent outside for his efforts.  And there goes the feed.  Hey tonight isn’t a total loss!  Ah there it is and Cannon has a chinlock.  Regal says Finlay is the best ever from his part of the world.  Cannon is a total heel here but the name is going to hold him back.  Titus gets a belly to back to escape from a headlock.  Titus uses his power but gets taken down.  Horny distracts Tyson and assists Titus to hit a Sky High (D’Lo’s old finisher) powerbomb to end this at 2:57.  Too short to grade but nothing of note.  This ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was just like any other episode of this show, as in nothing special at all.  I have more or less zero desire to watch this season as the biggest named pro is Chavo, the best guy in the group is I guess Young, there’s the stupid Redemption thing and this is to get on the next season of NXT rather than an actual prize, meaning someone will be on three seasons of the show by the end of next season.  It’s going to be a long Spring.

Results

Darren Young b. Jacob Novak – Release Full Nelson Slam

Darren Young won the Boot Camp Obstacle Course

Titus O’Neil b. Lucky Cannon – Sitout Powerbomb

NXT
Date: March 1, 2011
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Todd Grisham

This is the finale of Season 4 and I can’t say I’m complaining.  The two finalists are the monster Brodus Clay and the guy that makes having a bowl of vanilla ice cream while comparing the speed of paint drying against the speed grass grows sound like the time of your life, Johnny Curtis.  I have a bad feeling they’ll give it to Curtis as I’ve thought that’s what was coming since the season premiere.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the entire season so far.  My goodness O’Brian and Novak were worthless.

In the arena, Striker introduces the pros and then the rookies.  WE WANT BATEMAN chant.  But Vince and company doesn’t and they know what the fans want right?  Curtis says he should win because it’s personal and has been a fight between these two since the beginning.  He’s fought all his life and is going to kick Brodus’ teeth in.  Truth had to tell the crowd to be quiet so Curtis could talk.  They were chanting for Bateman.  Clay says Curtis stood up the entire season and they would be friends otherwise.  Brodus makes it clear that he’s the heel by making anti-Cleveland statements and talks about leaving like LeBron: a winner.  That sets up this.

Brodus Clay vs. Johnny Curtis

Clay sends him to the floor to start.  Back in and Curtis tries to stick and move.  He escapes the Tongan Death Grip but is taken down off the middle rope as we take a break.  There’s a new DVD coming out called the True Story of Wrestlemania with a bunch of behind the scenes stuff.  That could be very entertaining from a variety of perspectives.  Back with Clay holding Curtis in a nerve hold.

The idea here is that Clay is just doing basic stuff and letting Curtis make mistakes.  Suplex gets two and we go back to the nerve hold.  Clay goes after Truth but misses a corner splash.  DDT puts Clay down for a bit but the power of fat compels Curtis to get armdragged/wrist dragged off the top and the splash ends it at 5:30.

Rating: C. Well the right guy won at least.  I was hoping they weren’t going to pull the stupid surprise switch at the end by having Curtis get dominated the whole time and getting the fluke win.  This wasn’t bad but we’ve seen these two fight all season and no one cares anymore I don’t think.

Truth defends Curtis post match which means nothing.

Bryan and Bateman are in the back.  Bateman has a tag match later in an NXT reunion or something.  Bryan fulfills his promise by punching him in the face (read as he has his fist up and pushes it out which knocks Bateman down) for being eliminated.  Bryan says win this for chicks, for America and for Cleveland.  Funny stuff as usual, but since he can’t uh…..uh……just be there with Truth I guess, he’s been eliminated.

And yes I make fun of Curtis a lot but they did this last season with Kaitlyn by just deciding she was going to win and they’re doing it again here while Bateman and AJ respectively were clearly more popular but the company decided otherwise.  It’s rather annoying and when you have to see it coming all season it’s even more annoying.

I was killing time because it was a commercial and now we reair the Rock promo from last night.  It was very intense but at the same time he didn’t convince me of a thing.  I still side with Cena in this almost entirely.  I get that Rock vs. Cena is far more important and entertaining than NXT, but when the show is 50 minutes long including commercials and 20% of that is dedicated to something from last night, why should I believe that the show I’m watching is important?  They do it on Smackdown too which makes it even more questionable.

Conor O’Brian/Derrick Bateman vs. Jacob Novak/Bryon Saxton

Oh please make it short.  Bateman is the hometown boy so he’s the most popular of course.  It helps that he’s arguably the only talented one in there.  O’Brian and Novak start us off and the fans chant for Bateman.  Off to Saxton and we’re already having a boring match here maybe 90 seconds in.  The non-Bateman team tags in and out a lot while I guess we’re waiting for the hot tag to Bateman.

O’Brian is getting destroyed so there’s some value to this match already.  No mention of Season 5 so far if you were wondering.  Saxton stops the tag for a bit but can’t do it again.  Bateman comes in and cleans house on both heels (I think.  It’s hard to call O’Brian a face) but gets caught in that Downward Spiral Stunner that Ziggler uses by Saxton.  Novak walks out on the match and Bateman hits a bulldog/DDT hybrid to beat Saxton at 4:40.  Unique finisher if nothing else.

Rating: D+. Totally worthless match here as the whole thing was clearly just to have Bateman win it at the end.  Novak continues to perhaps be the most worthless wrestler this decade which is saying a lot.  Boring match but they needed to fill time since there was only one promo with meaning from last night.

We recap the main event of Raw to waste more time.  The camera deal was funny.

We reair the Shawn Michaels analysis or whatever you want to call that from last night to fill in even more time.  You couldn’t do like, Truth vs. Bryan or something to fill in 8 minutes?

Before we end the show, Josh says watch Smackdown to see Taker return.

Here’s a promo for Smackdown, saying Taker returns!  Why do I watch this show again?

There’s going to be a Season 5.  DANG IT!!!!  It’s going to be like nothing we’ve ever seen before but we get no more details than that.

Striker thanks the Pros as we’re finally at the ending.  Johnny Curtis wins.   I give up.  The winner is 3-7 and they made it clear this guy was going to win in the first episode, making the rest of this show COMPLETELY POINTLESS.  What in the world are they even airing this for anymore?  Total failure here as Clay dominated him in the ring and was pushed as a major guy all season, making the matches and competitions totally pointless.  I’m legit mad here and yet I’m totally not surprised at all.  Curtis says nothing of note and Clay hugs him.  Clay says he’ll take things from the fans now who took his dream away.

Overall Rating: F-. The matches sucked, the show wasn’t interesting and other than Orton vs. Nexus, I think they covered everything on Raw last night that mattered.  On top of that, the ending is as completely stupid a moment in WWE as I have ever seen which is saying A LOT.  I love WWE, but this is the first time I’ve ever considered not watching a show.  That says a lot but that’s how awful this was.  Pathetic and I’m legit mad about this.  Freaking nonsensed.

Results

Brodus Clay b. Johnny Curtis – Splash

Derrick Bateman/Conor O’Brian b. Jacob Novak/Byron Saxton – Bulldog DDT to Saxton

Johnny Curtis won Season 5 of NXT

NXT
Date: February 22, 2011
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Todd Grisham

This is the last elimination before we get to the finals which I think are next week but I’m not entirely sure.  I’m not sure who goes home tonight but hopefully it’s Curtis.  No idea what to expect on tonight’s show as they’ve had a match where everyone competes so maybe it’ll be more pro vs. rookie matches.  Let’s get to it.

Curtis and Truth open us up and Truth tells us that none of the Pros are going to be there tonight.  They trade clichés about being alone and Curtis says he’s a one man wolf pack tonight, complete with a howl.

Ricardo says some stuff in Spanish to Brodus and then in Spanish says Brodus is on his own tonight.

Nothing from Bateman and Bryan?  Ok then.

Into the arena we go with Striker bringing in the rookies.  Oh sorry I fell asleep when Curtis was on my screen.  I’m back now.  There appears to be a finish line in front of them.  Next week is the final apparently.  You can still earn immunity for tonight though.  At the moment Clay has 5 points and the others have zero.  There are two challenges tonight and the first is the Grace Under Pressure Physical Challenge.

First up they play beer pong, then build a tower according to a picture with blocks, then they have to flip a cup then fourth they have to use chop sticks to put a set of dice in the right order.  Wait did I wake up or not?  Curtis goes first and the booing is insane.  The cup flip thing is you put it on the edge of a table and have to flip it so that it lands upright.  Curtis takes 1:19 flat.  I stopped watching Wrestlemania 22 for this?

Bateman is second and is booed out of the building for sucking at beer pong.  Apparently Bateman used to work at Build-A-Bear Workshop.  When he’s building the tower he asks “What am I doing with my life?”  He messes up the tower and has to keep at it.  Time passes and they let him finish.  The time isn’t shown and does it matter anyway?

Brodus says set it up right because you’re not playing any okeydoke on him.  No clue what that means but ok.  Brodus outsmarts beer pong by throwing like 10 balls at once.  He aces the tower build to a big pop.  However he sucks at flipping cups and of course Curtis wins.  If you care for some reason his time was 1:46.1.  Curtis has 3 points and I really hope this isn’t what I think it’s going to be.

There’s a triple threat match later.

The Mania video helps a bit as we’re 40 days away.

And there’s the Chaperone trailer to further kill my spirit.

Brodus Clay vs. Johnny Curtis vs. Derrick Bateman

Clay’s stomach says WHEE now.  The other two try to jump him which gets Bateman thrown over the top and Curtis pounded down for his effort.  Nice suplex puts Curtis down.  Brodus looks rather uncomfortable with basic offense.  Tongan Death Grip goes on but Bateman pops up with a dropkick to take him down.  The final challenge is also worth three points and Curtis could get immunity.  Well of course he can.  He’s the least interesting so like AJ last Naomi last time he has to make the final right?

They double team Curtis again with chops and kicks.  Again, this completely fails.  Todd says that Brodus is ready for prime time, more or less admitting that the rest of this is pointless.  The two non-Broduses clothesline Clay to the floor and Bateman is tossed out.  Curtis is alone in the ring (drawing dead silence) and dives out with a tope con hilo, landing on his feet.  If he had hit more than their hands it would have looked better but at least he tried.  This takes us to a break.

Back with the two smaller guys hammering on each other.  Bateman breaks Curtis’ momentum and hits a running dropkick on Clay.  Clay wakes up and hammers down both guys.  With Curtis choking him in the corner the camera tilts up at Brodus’ face and it’s a frightening sight indeed.  Clay gets a Fisherman’s Suplex on Curtis as we really need to end this now.  They’ve been out there over ten minutes and it’s clear they’re running out of things to do.

Brodus covers Bateman and Curtis hits the guillotine legdrop to the back of Clay for two.  Cover to Bateman gets two as well.  Clay sets for his T-Bone to Curtis but gets double teamed for about the third time.  A double suplex to Clay actually works and then Curtis suplexes Bateman onto Clay and gets the pin on Bateman at 11:00.  Dang it he’s going to win isn’t he?

Rating: C. This went too fast and I really don’t like Curtis winning but the match was ok.  They gave them some time and while it was maybe a minute or two too long, this was still pretty good for what they were going for.  I have this bad feeling Curtis is going to win it though which is the worst possible outcome but it’s been set in stone since the beginning of the season so I’m not really surprised.

We replay Cena’s promo on Rock last night to kill off about ten minutes.  During this we see Rock’s promo from the week before.  So we’re seeing a flashback to a flashback?  There’s a zen riddle in there somewhere.  The Tooth Fairy line still cracks me up.  I love how there has to be a graphic on the screen telling us this was on Raw last night so we don’t think Cena showed up on NXT.  It says a lot about Cena that he has the crowd in the palm of his hand after coming out to a very mixed reaction.  The line about Rock saying he loves them and Cena being there every week to show it sums up this entire feud.

Talk the Talk is next.

Curtis starts us off and thanks the fans for the pleasure of being here.  Could the flat out say “Vote for Curtis or we’ll murder every puppy in the world” any better?  Bateman says he’s the Sacramento King of the competition.  That’s booed for some reason.  He says he has, eats, sleeps and breathes “it”.  Clay, getting a big pop, gives shoutouts to his friends and family.  You can’t see the mic cube in his hand.  He says the west coast is awesome and all that stuff.  Curtis is booed, Bateman is booed and Clay wins (thank goodness!), making him immune.  This was really short.

Bateman is gone.  Blast it.  Is anyone really surprised by this?  He says it’s particular (yes particular) to be eliminated.  He says he’s proven his worth and he plays it rough except for “Sacramenento”  (yes he said it wrong).  Clay drills Curtis to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Well as unhappy as I am with the ending, this was a pretty mediocre show.  The match was just ok and the challenges ranged from stupid to short.  The Cena promo is easily the best part of it which isn’t saying a lot.  Big drop off from last week but at least Clay is in the finals like he should be.  Thankfully this ends next week.

Results

Johnny Curtis won the Grace Under Pressure Challenge

Johnny Curtis b. Brodus Clay and Derrick Bateman – Curtis pinned Bateman after suplexing him onto Clay

Brodus Clay won the Talk the Talk Challenge

Derrick Bateman was eliminated in third place

NXT
Date: February 15, 2011
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Josh Matthews

It’s another week of NXT after a good show last week if I remember it correctly.  I don’t think there’s an elimination tonight but I could be wrong.  Either way the final three are here now and two of them are entertaining enough.  After last night’s return of the Rock I’m in an optimistic mood about WWE at the moment so let’s get to it.

And NXT isn’t playing on WWE.com.  It says the video I’m attempting to watch isn’t available right now and to please try back later.  Ah there it is.

Striker is in the ring with the rookies and next week is an elimination.  Then the next week we’ll have the finale.  Good to know.  The first challenge this week is the Smash and Grab Challenge.  There is a piñata above all of their heads with NXT Dollars inside.  You have to break the piñata and run the dollars up to their respective pro.  The Pros are “coaching”.  As Josh says, “coaching what?  How to hit a piñata?”  They keep moving the piñata and Curtis, who is going first, can’t hit anything.  He takes off the blindfold for a bit and after putting it back on can’t break the piñata.  This is so stupid.  Curtis gets zero.

Clay is up second and BLASTS the piñata after about a second comes off the clock and takes all his time to get all the dollars he can.  He jogs up the ramp and cashes it in with plenty of time.

Bateman says his strategy is to hit the piñata hard then run the money to the pro.  Bateman says stay classy San Diego.  I never liked that movie.  Clay got $4,800 NXT Dollars.  Bateman hits it but can’t break it so he grabs it and pulls it down.  Clay wins more or less by default.  I’m officially stupider having watched that.

Clay vs. R-Truth next.

R-Truth vs. Brodus Clay

Truth takes him to the floor quickly and hits an over the top dive to take over.  Back in and it’s all Truth here.  He tries a monkey flip because he’s an idiot and is launched off.  Clay gets a suplex and it’s off to the nerve hold.  Truth gets a jawbreaker and a dropkick to the knee to break that up.  A middle rope dropkick misses though and a splash ends Truth clean in 2:50.  Yep Clay just beat a guy that could get the world title shot at Mania this Sunday perfectly clean.  Eh it’s not like this show is paid attention to anyway.  No rating as it was more or less a glorified squash.

Bateman vs. Bryan, as in rookie vs. pro, later.

Mania ad.  That song is slowly growing on me.  The chorus is catchy.

Time for Challenge #2.  There are three stools in buckets.  Above those are other buckets which apparently has unpleasant stuff in it.  Ah apparently it’s trivia and if you lose you get messy.  Here are the categories and each have three questions, each with 100-300 dollars each.

80s

90s

Title History

Wrestlemania

Divas

They manage to screw up what decade is which as Brodus picks 80s and the question is about Smackdown.  No one knows who was in DX and won the Jesse the Body Award (Rick Rude).  These questions aren’t that hard if you think about them (in 1994 this superstar won the WWE Title for the first time in 11 years).

The questions are a bit harder here, such as which Diva managed the most wrestlers to championships (Sunny) and who is the only wrestler to win the WWE Title in a cage match (Batista).  This is fun.  They’re not saying the score but apparently Brodus wins.  The other two are slimed.  Todd: YOU CAN’T DO THAT ON TELEVISION!  10 points for those that get that reference.  That gave Brodus three more immunity points for a total of 5.

We recap the Rock’s return which literally had me shaking and I wasn’t even a big Rock fan.  Obviously for the sake of time they clip this down but they show a good deal of it.  They air this like it aired last night, as in not a video package with music etc.  We get his entrance, talking as Dwayne, making fun of Miz, the e-mail and running down Cole, the talking about Cena and ripping him apart, the swearing and the ending.  They aired almost ten minutes of this.

Daniel Bryan vs. Derrick Bateman

Good deal of time for this match.  Yeah they take a break before Bateman’s entrance.  I thought they would.  They shake hands to start.  Ziggler cracks jokes and it almost sounded like he said something about ROH but I’m not sure.  Test of strength to start and Bateman bridges out after being taken to the ground.  Ziggler says he’s the champion now (again I think as he’s not being focused on).

All Bryan to start as Ziggler makes fun of Ricardo’s Spanish.  It’s just Maryse, Ziggler and Ricardo this week up there.  Bryan gets out of a wristlock and gets two.  Crowd doesn’t seem too interested.  Ziggler wants to know who they’re supposed to root for.  Ricardo: “Not the Chargers.”  Bryan works on the arm as is his custom.  Bateman outmoves him though and sends him to the floor.

Suicide Dive has Bryan in trouble as we…don’t take a break.  Ok yes we do.  I think Todd tried to send them to one too early and had to talk a bit more to get them there.  Apparently Ziggler said “This isn’t ROH so don’t shake hands.”  I love little lines like those.

2-21-11 ad which allegedly shows two men.  I’ve heard about a dozen different reasons and explanations as to why it’s either HHH, Taker, Sting or some combination of them all.  My take on it: we’ll find out in six days so stop wasting my time talking about a shadow that might not be the Undertaker that you think is on the steps outside of a house.

Back with Bryan in control again.  Bateman says he’s learned his lesson as Bryan kicks him in the back.  Bryan says elbow and then hits an elbow to take Bateman down.  He goes up and gets a nice reaction for it.  He misses the headbutt so it’s a moot point but nice posing.  Big clothesline by Bateman for two.  Bateman gets a pair of rollups for two each.  Bryan tries the LeBell Lock and Bateman lifts him up into kind of a powerbomb for a long two.

Good match so far.  Bryan takes him down but Bateman goes for the LeBell Lock.  Bryan rolls through the hold and gets a SICK version of it of his own for the tap out at 8:50.  Surprisingly quite good match from these two here and by surprising I mean Bateman’s part.

Rating: B-. Good stuff indeed here as Bateman showed a lot here.  This was a good match from both guys as Bryan was having to work a bit out there.  I like the chemistry these two have as they work well together both in comedy bits and in the ring.  I think Brodus is going to be around for awhile so giving Bateman the win is something I could live with.

Overall Rating: B. I know that’s probably high but this was one of the more enjoyable shows in a very long time.  The opening stupid challenge is the only part here that was stupid.  You had a squash (kind of) in the first match and then a fun trivia game and the Rock video, closing out with a solid main event.  Yeah this was good overall but I won’t mind it when this show is over.  Good show and one of the best of the season so far.

Results

Brodus Clay won the Smash and Grab Challenge

Brodus Clay b. R-Truth – Splash

Brodus Clay won the Trivia Challenge

Daniel Bryan b. Derrick Bateman – LeBell Lock

NXT
Date: February 8, 2011
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Todd Grisham

It’s elimination night I believe which is probably a good thing.  I wish it was Curtis that was gone but he’s the chosen one so it’ll probably be Bateman or Saxton.  Anyway, this should be decent enough as the show has gotten a lot better recently.  I like them being in the Super Bowl town because it gives us a nice mini-theme tonight possibly.  Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the season so far which has been a lot better after the first two went out.

Striker is on the stage and we’re doing the joust thing called Rock-Em Sock-Em this week.  First match is Bateman vs. Curtis.  Bateman is in the final.  Winner gets two immunity points by the way.  Brodus pulls a Michael Tarver and goes after Saxton so it’s a DQ.  Bateman vs. Saxton is the final.  There’s a controversial finish but Saxton wins.  To be fair it’s very close.  Naturally we have to do it one more time.  Surprisingly enough the rematch announcement gets a pop.  Saxton wins again to get two points.  That gives Curtis 3, Bateman and Saxton 2 and Clay 0.

We recap the Talk the Talk Challenge from last week including the Turd Ferguson chant.

Derrick Bateman vs. Byron Saxton

No intro here as we end the package and it’s off to the match.  Bateman works on the arm and gets a nice kick to the back to take over.  Apparently Ricardo is the official new pro for Del Rio.  Please tell me that it would be Alberto getting the shot and not Ricardo.  Saxton takes over as we talk about the Dazed and Confused shirt that Ziggler is wearing.

Bateman fights back and gets a dropkick in the corner and a clothesline for two.  Josh says whoever loses here is gone.  Saxton gets a small package for two.  Bateman grabs a modified LeBell Lock (closer to a Crossface) to get the win at 4:30.

Rating: D+. Well it was ok but that’s about it.  This is one of those matches that was just kind of there.  I don’t like using that rating but that really is the best way to put it.  One great thing here though was we saw a coach teaching his pro something and having it come into play to end the match.  We never see that but this time it worked fine.  This wasn’t anything special but it wasn’t horrible.

Time for another challenge worth 3 points (Curtis 3, Bateman and Saxton 2 and Clay 0).  This time we’re going to more or less play the Price is Right.  Various people are going to model things and the rookies have to guess the retail price.  My goodness they’ve turned their show into a commercial!  First up is the 50 Greatest Superstars of All Time DVD presented by AJ from last season.  The DVD is 34.95???  SWEET GOODNESS that’s insane!  Brodus is closest.

Naomi is up next and presents WWE Kids Magazine.  By presents I mean holds up and smiles if you’re wondering.  Clay is closest with $1.  Oh ok you can’t go over.  That makes sense.  AJ is back again with a foam World Heavyweight Championship.  Saxton gets it right on the nose at $19.99.

Bateman says he said the same thing which he didn’t.  This is rather stupid if you didn’t get it but it’s surprisingly entertaining.  Naomi has the History of the WWE Book.  Clay wins with 23 dollars.  Saxton went just over with 23.95.  Ziggler (I think): “That’s the first time Saxton has ever been over!”

Clay and Curtis are tied for immunity.  My what luck that they have a match later.

Video about the Road to Wrestlemania going through the Elimination Chamber.

Truth is with Curtis in the back and they talk about the accusations of Truth saying Curtis has a big head behind his back.  Truth’s leg seems to be fine after the attack last night.

Brodus Clay vs. Johnny Curtis

This is the main event.  Apparently Josh thinks he gets to decide who gets immunity.  The superstars make fun of Truth not knowing the right town last night.  Curtis hammers away to start to control.  Clay takes over with a fireman’s carry into a hot shot.  Nice overhead suplex gets two for Clay.  The match drags badly so the Turd chant gets going again.  Ziggler eggs it on and continues to be one of the funniest parts of this show.

Dolph leaves and Brodus hammers away.  Curtis gets a slingshot legdrop to the back of Clay’s neck for two.  Dolph is back and Grisham hits on Maryse who is at the top of the stage now.  Top rope dropkick gets no cover as Clay is in the ropes.  Brodus gets a shot to the throat using the ropes and a powerslam ends it at 6:22.  The announcers called it a bulldog slam because they’re not very intelligent.

Rating: C-. This was a little better, but there are only so many times that these four guys can fight each other.  The match was ok but the level of interest is just completely gone.  Clay is cool, Curtis isn’t interesting, Clay is better than everyone else in the competition.  That’s the end of the stuff we can learn here but it’s what we keep seeing.

2-21-11 promo again with the grave line from last night.

Clay and Curtis get 20 seconds to say why they should get immunity.  Curtis says it’s because the Packers Rule.  Curtis says the Steelers should have won.  Why?  They scored less points.  Naturally Curtis wins the live crowd approval and gets immunity.  Dang it I hate this show.  He just got beat clean so let’s give him the advantage.  Saxton is out and can’t talk due to tears.  Ah ok there it is.

Saxton says that it’s ok and everyone makes mistakes.  He’ll forgive them though and will be back.  Ziggler goes off on him in a great rant to make Saxton mad.  Masters tells Saxton to punch him.  Instead he points at Ziggler to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I wasn’t impressed tonight.  The immunity thing is a joke because it’s clear that Curtis was either the weakest or second weakest.  He lost to Clay and STILL gets immunity?  That makes less than no sense but something tells me he’ll manage to win this thing anyway because he’s what WWE has decided we want to see despite no one caring about him.  Bad show this week mainly due to the booking at the end.

Results

Byron Saxton won the Rock-Em Sock-Em Challenge

Derrick Bateman b. Byron Saxton – LeBell Lock

Brodus Clay won the WWEshop.com Challenge

Brodus Clay b. Johnny Curtis – Powerslam

Byron Saxton was eliminated in 4^th place

NXT
Date: February 1, 2011
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Josh Matthews

Another week but no elimination this time.  It’s good that we’re down to the final four as the show went way up in quality last time.  Also putting Clay with Alberto is a nice idea as that’s a very lethal combination especially with Alberto having momentum at the moment.  This is a day late but that’s fine I suppose.  Let’s get to it.

Striker is in the ring as is traditional on this show.  There will be an elimination next week.  Here are the Rookies and the Pros.  For some reason Brodus comes out with Ricardo instead.  When asked, Ricardo says that Alberto is too busy so he’s filling in tonight.  I hope that’s not traditional now.  Oh and Ricardo speaks English.

The first challenge tonight is Arm Wrestling.  Yeah is there any point to this at all?  First up is Curtis vs. Saxton.  They go left handed and Curtis wins in about 2 seconds.  Clay vs. Bateman now in what should be one sided.  Bateman screams at Bryan to slap him so Bryan smacks the heck out of him a few times.

This lasts a bit and then Brodus turns on the jets and destroys him.  This is for three immunity points by the way.  Johnny almost gets him but then Brodus headbutts him to give Curtis the win.  Dang it they’re really pushing Curtis aren’t they?  He’s painfully boring but they’ve decided that they want him to win.  I hate that.  He’s painfully boring but they’ve decided that they want him to win.  I hate that.

Byron Saxton vs. Chris Masters

This is the first match and had no intro to it at all.  They went to a break after saying it was later tonight and there’s the bell.  By the way I’m watching this on Youtube so the breaks are edited out so I’ll be adding 90 seconds to the time as the NXT commercials are noticeable shorter.

Masters starts out with power but gets kicked in the face to slow him down.  Nice let’s go Masters chant.  He’s improved dramatically over the last few months.  Saxton starts getting destroyed by the power again and there’s the Masterlock to end it in 3:12.  Ziggler was about to throw in the towel once Saxton was in trouble.  There’s another Mr. Perfect trait for Ziggler: a towel.

Rating: D. This was one of those matches where they were doing stuff but nothing happened at all.  It wasn’t a squash but more or less just an extended workout for Masters.  I like Saxton but he comes off like this season’s Otunga.  He has charisma and is entertaining but can’t back it up so well in the ring.  He’s better at it than Otunga, but not by much.

We see a clip from earlier with Bryan trying to teach Bateman the guillotine hold.  Bateman can’t quite get it and says he isn’t strong enough.  Bryan says that isn’t what submissions are about.  This is a fine example of why Bateman is talented: this is actually rather funny but the lines they’re saying are boring.  That’s the sign of a talented entertainer.

Gail comes up and Daniel says she’s good at the guillotine.  Bateman says that women know nothing about submission wrestling.  He’s unconscious 4 seconds later and Gail and Bryan are making out.  Again, much more entertaining than it had any right to be which is a good sign.

Brodus Clay vs. Ted DiBiase

Still no entrances tonight.  Before this starts we get a quick recap of last week where Brodus switched pros to explain why Ricardo is there.  See, that’s something WWE is very good at.  They’re incredibly user friendly.  If this is your first show in awhile or your first show ever, you’re immediately told why Brodus has that guy at ringside, that Brodus dominated the other rookies and why he has a match with DiBiase tonight.  That took about 90 seconds.  That’s what you get from WWE all the time and it’s a great touch.

DiBiase gets an entrance and Maryse comes out after he does in almost her own entrance.  DiBiase charges at him and gets shoved into the corner twice.  He charges again and manages to get a chinlock.  The main thing here is that Maryse is hitting on the announcers and actually gives Todd her number.  That’s rather awesome actually.  As that’s going on, the guys hit the floor and it’s all Ted who hits a seated dropkick while Brodus is up against the railing.

Josh wants to call the number because he thinks it’s a pizza place.  While this is happening, Brodus sends him into the post and we head back into the ring.  Nice head and arms suplex as Brodus is taking over quickly.  Off to the nerve hold as the crowd is into this actually.  Maryse is taking pictures with her phone.  Brodus misses a splash and Ted looks like he wants Dream Street.  Maryse kisses Todd and then slaps him.  The distraction is enough for Brodus to hit a powerslam to end DiBiase at 4:28.

Rating: C+. This was rather entertaining actually.  Maryse added a nice level of comedy to this and it raised the match up.  That and you add in Brodus being fun to watch and you got an entertaining match.  Brodus is the kind of guy that you see and you want to look at due to how different he looks.  That’s a very valuable asset to have and sets him apart from the rest of the group.  Bateman is entertaining but you wouldn’t stop to watched unless he was doing something.  Brodus is someone you stop to see because he looks unique.

In the back Curtis is holding ice on his head after the headbutt.  Saxton comes up and says he’s worried about Johnny.  Apparently R-Truth says Johnny is getting too big a head and his ego is out of control.  Johnny says they’re not friends and that Saxton is the creepiest man he’s ever met in his life.  The deadpan delivery there is great.

Time for another challenge.  At the moment Curtis has three immunity points and everyone else has zero.  This is the Talk the Talk Challenge and it’s worth 2 points.  Then why are we having this?  Oh I guess it might shift the voters’ opinions.  Kind of a stretch but ok.  Everyone has 30 seconds to talk about a given topic.  The first topic is WWE Pros and Saxton gets R-Truth.  Saxton does a parody of Truth’s rap and is booed out of the building.

The category is still WWE Pros and Bateman gets Ziggler.  He says he has the face of a worn out catcher’s mask and his name used to be Turd Ferguson.  I love SNL references.  Curtis gets Chris Masters.  Since he can’t top Saxton he drills Brodus and runs away.  Ok then.  Another Turd chant starts up.  Ziggler says if they don’t stop he’ll leave, drawing the pop of the night.

Brodus gets Daniel Bryan and says he’s incredibly boring.  He does have a pretty girl though and that she probably sits in bed at night, wondering what it’s like to be with a real man.  He’s quoting a scene from Rocky III here where Clubber Lang says the same thing to Rocky.  Bryan says he’s fat.  Bateman wins which he should have.  This was more or less a waste of time.

The trailer for the Chaperone is aired again.  It still looks bad.  There are three minutes I’ll never get back from my life.

Raw ReBound eats up about 4 minutes.

R-Truth/Johnny Curtis vs. Daniel Bryan/Derrick Bateman

This is the main event.  Bateman vs. Truth to start us off.  Truth takes over and it’s off to Curtis for some rookie on rookie action.  Ziggler says ECW a few times for no apparent reason.  They tumble out to the floor and slug it out.  This turns into a brawl until the Pros break it up and we take a break.

Back with Curtis vs. Bryan and the Pro is in control.  Apparently this is the 50^th episode of NXT.  Josh thinks Saxton is gone next week.  Off to the rookies again with Bateman in control.  Bryan comes in again as there’s much better continuity between Bateman and Bryan.  Bryan tries a surfboard but can’t get Curtis back.  Instead with his legs intertwined with Curtis’ he jumps into the air for a stomp.  That was cool looking.

Body scissors by the US Champion as Curtis is in trouble.  Off to Bateman again but Curtis gets a bad looking spin kick to take Bateman down.  Off to both Pros with Truth beating Bryan up a bit.  Curtis comes back in for a double suplex with his pro.  Bateman and Truth go to the floor and Curtis misses the leg drop.  LeBell Lock ends it seconds later at 6:33 shown of 8:03 (90 seconds assumed for commercials on NXT) and we’re off the air.  Or web I suppose.

Rating: C. Not bad here with some nice teamwork from Bateman/Bryan.  Curtis is ok at his very best but he’s about as generic as anyone I’ve ever seen.  Bateman is funny on promos and passable in the ring but also no one great.  This was probably the best choice for a main event and it wasn’t too bad.  Bateman looked pretty good at least.

Overall Rating: C+. This was pretty good I thought.  They packed it with stuff and the 45 minutes flew by.  You had three matches and two challenges with only the Talk the Talk one being somewhat bad.  The rest of it was either ok or short enough to not be bad.  Brodus continues to look like a huge fish in a small pond which means Curtis will likely wind up winning the whole thing.  Either way, good show this week as the final four continue to make this show watchable.

Results

Johnny Curtis won an Arm Wrestling Challenge

Chris Masters b. Byron Saxton – Masterlock

Brodus Clay b. Ted DiBiase – Powerslam

Derrick Bateman won the Talk the Talk Challenge

Daniel Bryan/Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis/R-Truth – LeBell Lock to Curtis