Night of Champions 2012
Date: September 16, 2012
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s another WWE PPV here and in this case almost everything is for a title. This doesn’t really mean much as almost every show has four or five title shots but it’s an interesting theme I guess. The main event here is Cena vs. Punk III for the title with Punk defending for once, which is the third combination they could go with in their series. Other than that not much really stands out here so let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Brodus Clay, Epico, Primo, Justin Gabriel, Tensai, Tyson Kidd, Michael McGillicutty, Zach Ryder, Titus O’Neal, Darren Young, Jinder Mahal, JTG, Drew McIntyre, Heath Slater, Ted DiBiase, Santino Marella

The winner gets a US Title shot at Cesaro later in the night. Cameron is back from suspension apparently. Anybody but Santino. Anybody. Slater asks everyone to stand back so he can dance and he’s eliminated by 15 people at once. McGillicutty is thrown out as is DiBiase in about 40 seconds. Brodus dumps Primo and Mahal a few seconds later. The problem in battle royals is that there isn’t much else to say other than who tosses out who until we get to the end. Brodus puts out Epico and Tensai LAUNCHES Gabriel out.

Kidd is sent to the apron and tries a slingshot hurricanrana but gets powerbombed onto the pile of people. The monsters square off and Santino tries a double Cobra to no avail. The Players and McIntyre team up and dump Brodus, who may have hurt his shoulder. The Cobra puts JTG out and Ryder dropkicks McIntyre out. Brodus leaves and his shoulder seems fine so maybe it was just something quick. There’s the Cobra and it drops Tensai and Young, with the latter getting covered.

O’Neal dumps Santino and we’re down to Titus, Young, Tensai and Ryder. Titus suplexes Young onto Tensai before the partners go after Ryder. The Players double team Ryder but get dumped by Tensai. Tensai thought Ryder went out but he slid back in. Tensai charges into the double knee in the corner but he blocks the Rough Ryder into a powerbomb position. He goes to dump Ryder but Ryder counters into a hurricanrana to eliminate Tensai for the win at 5:42.

Rating: C-. It’s a battle royal so there isn’t much to say here. Ryder getting the shot is fine as the fans are going to react to him. He doesn’t have much of a chance against Cesaro but that’s ok as I’m sure more than one other title will change hands tonight. This was about what you would expect, but at least Santino didn’t win which would have been insufferable.

The opening video is all about Cena vs. Punk. They aren’t even hiding that the Smackdown Title means nothing does it?

Cole talks about the Lawler story and says that Jerry is going home this weekend. That’s great to hear. JBL is introduced as the replacement and says that he’s just keeping the seat warm for Lawler.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Sin Cara vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

Before the match, Miz complains about having to be in this and says that he’s going to file a complaint against Booker T for making him do this. Miz is champion coming in if you’re new at this. Rey is sent to the floor to start but Cara sends Cody to the floor as well before armdragging Miz outside too. Cody and Rey come back in as Cara drops to the mat for no apparent reason.

It’s time for the masked guys to fight. I know this has been a match people have wanted to see and I’m not really sure why. Rey takes Cara down for two but Cody makes the save. The unmasked guys go at it for awhile and everything breaks down. Rey goes up but takes too long so Cara goes after him. The Disaster Kick hits Cara but Miz breaks up a superplex so he can hook a Tower of Doom which gets two on Rey. Miz sends Cody to the floor as the fans sound like they’re chanting for Cody.

The short DDT gets two on Rey but Cara comes back with some high flying stuff to send Miz to the floor, followed by a big dive. Rey hits a headscissors on Cody on the floor followed by a seated senton off the apron. Cara gets two on the champ off a slingshot senton but he gets sent into the corner for the corner clothesline from Miz. Rey comes in with a kind of Vader Bomb for two (why has that move become so popular lately?) but Cody jumps him from behind for two of his own.

Cara puts Cody in 619 position but gets sent into the post by Miz. Miz goes after Rey but winds up taking the 619 instead. The top rope splash gets two for Rey on Miz but Cody saves. Cody tries to steal the pin on Miz but Cara saves. Cody goes for Cara’s mask but Rey saves. Rey gets sent to the floor with his sliding bump and Cara hits Cody in the head with an enziguri from the apron.

Cara tries to put another mask on Cody but Miz runs in and hits a backbreaker/neckbreaker combo for two on Cara. Miz tries to powerbomb Cara but Cara puts the mask on him instead. Cody tries Cross Rhodes on Cara but Miz bumps into them (he can’t see because of the mask) and hits the Finale on Cody for the pin to retain at 12:42.

Rating: B-. This was a great choice for an opener as they hit a great streak of near falls and saves in there. The ending was creative but I’m really not sure what it added. Miz pinning Cody doesn’t mean anything significant and he would have hit the Finale on him in that situation if he could see or not. Good opener here which got the crowd fired up.

The Prime Time Players are talking to Eve when someone comes up to tell her there’s an emergency. Eve runs off and finds Kaitlyn down with a bad ankle. She isn’t sure who attacked her but Eve says they’ll figure out something.

We recap the Anger Management story with I believe the same video that aired on Friday. Basically Kane and Bryan both have anger issues and have been sent to anger management, resulting in some wacky outcomes and a tag title shot tonight.

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth vs. Kane/Daniel Bryan

Kane and Kofi start but it’s quickly off to Truth. The big man powers Truth down and it’s off to Bryan for some NO kicks which drive him crazy. Truth armdrags him down and it’s back to Kofi with a top rope forearm for two. A BIG kick to the face puts Bryan down and it’s back to Truth for the spinning legdrop. The champions are the heels here by default, but it’s more like they’re just the less popular team.

Back to Kane who pounds Truth down into the corner and stomps away a bit. Back to Bryan and the fans erupt. The fans are going to turn this guy face by force soon and it’s going to be massive. Bryan fires off some kicks for two and it’s back to Kane for a low dropkick for two. The challengers try to work together but Bryan misses a dropkick in the corner and it’s time for a fight.

They almost brawl but Bryan wants to hug it out, drawing the pop of the night so far. JBL freaking out over stuff is something I’ve missed. Truth FINALLY makes the hot tag after apparently writing the great American novel while the challengers hugged. Kofi hits his usual stuff and it sounds like the fans are booing him.

Kane pulls Bryan to the floor to avoid Trouble in Paradise and they get in another argument. Kofi dropkicks Kane and (almost) hits a flip dive onto Bryan. NO Lock to Kofi doesn’t work as Truth makes the save to more booing. Bryan kicks Kofi in the face but Kane tags himself in and loads up the clothesline. Another argument with Bryan lets Kofi run up for a rana but Bryan holds Kane’s foot. Kane stays on the top but Bryan shoves him off into a splash to Kofi to win the titles at 8:30.

Rating: B-. This was different but the fans ate it up with a spoon. There was absolutely no other option for this match as Kane and Bryan are currently over like free beer in a frat house. The pop for the win is bigger than probably all of the reactions for a tag title match in the last five years combined, so at least people are paying attention now.

Both guys say they’re the champions post match but Kane sends fire from the posts to end the argument.

Kaitlyn can’t go tonight and Eve says no one deserves the title match tonight. Booker says Eve can have it. Teddy isn’t pleased.

Cole and JBL talk about breast cancer and how WWE is partnering with a cancer research foundation which is why the middle rope is pink. Nothing wrong with that at all.

US Title: Zack Ryder vs. Antonio Cesaro

Ryder won the preshow battle royal to get this shot. The word of the night is Unfair, which is what Cesaro thinks this match is. Cesaro takes him down with ease to start but Ryder takes Cesaro down by the wrist to counter. A flapjack and dropkick get two for Ryder but Cesaro shrugs them off and hooks a chinlock. A clothesline gets two for Cesaro as does the gutwrench suplex.

Cesaro gets the same off a regular suplex and the fans cheer for Ryder. They slug it out but Cesaro throws him into the air and hits the European uppercut for two. Cesaro hooks a reverse neckbreaker but pulls Ryder onto his back for a submission hold. Ryder escapes and hits a discus lariat for no cover.

A rollup gets two for Ryder as does a middle rope dropkick. Ryder hits a neckbreaker for two and Cesaro rolls to the apron. He goes up but Ryder brings him down with a hurricanrana. Ryder loads up the Broski Boot but Aksana pulls him to the floor. Back in and a European Uppercut sets up the Neutralizer to retain the title at 6:40.

Rating: C-. This was perfectly fine. It wasn’t a great match at all but for a thrown together PPV title defense this was fine. Cesaro needs a bit more development but he’s fine having random challengers like this one. Ryder is good to throw out there as the people still like him so the fans react to what he does. Nothing great but this was fine.

Otunga, Del Rio and Rodriguez are in the back. Ricardo has his neck brace off and Otunga yells at him, saying it needs to be on at all times even though Ricardo says it’s not hurting anymore. They call Ricardo stupid and he puts the brace back on.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton

Basic grudge match here. The fans like Ziggler and they fight over a lockup to start. Ziggler avoids a right hand and brags about doing so. A clothesline takes Ziggler down and Randy stomps away. Dolph comes back with a dropkick and a neckbreaker for two. Cole is playing the straight man on commentary here tonight and it’s really refreshing. Orton counters a suplex into a slingshot suplex for two.

The backbreaker sets up some clotheslines from Randy but he can’t hook the Elevated DDT. The camera keeps cutting to Vickie and it’s getting distracting. Ziggler tries a hurricanrana but Orton counters into a powerbomb. Orton gets shoved off the top and a missile dropkick gets two for Ziggler. Dang it quit cutting to her. We get it: she’s on the floor and shouting a lot. We can see that very clearly from the regular camera shot.

Ziggler drops a bunch of elbows capped off by the jumping elbow for two. Off to a chinlock with the headstand by Ziggler but this time he bridges forward to crank on the neck even more. Back up and another dropkick gets two for Ziggler. Dolph goes up but gets crotched and superplexed down for two. They slug it out and Ziggler holds his own. He runs into an elbow but takes Orton down with the Fameasser for two.

They head to the floor with Orton taking over. He hits the Elevated DDT off the barricade but Orton throws Ziggler back in instead of taking the countout. That only gets two back inside and Orton loads up the RKO but gets countered into the sleeper. Orton throws him off his back, throws Ziggler into the air and pulls him into the RKO for the pin at 18:15.

Rating: B+. Very good match here with Ziggler more than hanging with Orton. JBL pushed the idea that if Ziggler cashes in, Orton should get a title match. My guess is that they’ll go with that feud after Orton gets back from the movie which isn’t a bad idea. I’m not wild on Ziggler losing AGAIN but at least it was in a competitive match.

We get a sneak preview of Dredd 3D.

Divas Title: Layla vs. Eve Torres

I can’t say I blame them for swapping in Eve. Kaitlyn just can’t do anything in the ring. JBL is talking about the Loch Ness Monster and other conspiracy theories for some reason. Layla grabs a quick rollup for two followed by a headlock. You can see the fans walking to the back during the match. A low dropkick takes Eve down and they shake hands, only for Eve to get a cheap shot to take over. Eve hooks a headscissors choke as the fans chant OLE. Layla makes a comeback but misses her bouncing cross body. The rolling neckbreaker gives us a new champion at 6:35.

Rating: D+. The match was technically fine but my goodness the crowd being silent brings it down. Eve being champion makes sense but it’s not like the title changes anything with her. She’s FAR better in the ring than some of the girls on the roster so I can’t complain much there, but they’ve treated the title like nothing for so long that this doesn’t mean anything at all.

Some cancer survivors are here and at least they’re not booed.

Now we get a video about breast cancer.

Bryan is shouting about being the tag team champions and runs into AJ who is just standing around with her hips cocked to the side in a short skirt. She doesn’t say anything so Bryan keeps walking and runs into Dr. Shelby. Kane shows up and shouts that he’s the tag champions (I’m not messing up with grammar. That’s what they’re saying).

They get in another fight and AJ snaps and tells them to calm down. Shelby makes Bryan congratulate Kane but Kane won’t say anything. Bryan yells that he’s the tag team champions but Kane pops up and pours Gatorade over Bryan. Kane: “I’M GOING TO DISNEYLAND!” Stop the shot. Just cut it now. This isn’t going to be topped. Kane can be heard running off shouting that he’s the tag team champions and AJ loses it with laughter.

The look on JBL’s face somehow makes it even better. “I came back for THIS???”

After that hilarious moment, we bring it way down with a recap of Del Rio vs. Sheamus. In short, they had a match, Sheamus beat Del Rio, they had another match, Sheamus beat Del Rio again, Del Rio complained, now they’re having another match and Sheamus can’t use the Brogue Kick.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

Sheamus is in mostly white attire here which isn’t a great look for him. We get the big match intros which is a nice touch. Before the bell here’s Booker T. He’s concluded his investigation into the Brogue Kick and the move is legal, thereby making the last two weeks TOTALLY POINTLESS. Sheamus fires a quick Brogue Kick but takes out Otunga instead. Referees come out to take Otunga to the back.

JBL defends his own loss to Mysterio in 23 seconds as Sheamus pounds away in the corner. A neckbreaker gets two for Sheamus and we head to the floor where Sheamus hits the shoulder from the apron. Del Rio throws him off the steps into the announce table to take over. Back in the ring and Del Rio cranks on the arm followed by a kick to the ribs. Del Rio uses Seth Rollins’ Blackout for two. Cole is talking about the history of the title and thankfully they say it only goes back ten years.

Sheamus’ shoulder gets sent into the post and a double ax off the top to the arm gets two for Alberto. Del Rio goes up again but Sheamus knocks him off, only to have Alberto grab an armbreaker over the ropes. An attempt at another ax handle is countered by an ax handle from Sheamus. Sheamus fires off more running ax handles and rams Alberto face first into the post.

There are the ten forearms in the corner and Alberto is in trouble. White Noise is countered into a Backstabber for two. The fans want Ziggler. The Cross Armbreaker is countered into White Noise and the fans still want Ziggler. The Brogue Kick misses and there’s the enziguri in the corner for a very close two. Another Brogue Kick misses but Sheamus escapes the Armbreaker but he can’t hook the Cloverleaf.

Sheamus charges at Del Rio but gets low bridged and his arm is trapped in the ropes. Del Rio fires away kicks and Sheamus is in trouble. There’s the Armbreaker but Sheamus rolls on top of Del Rio and powerbombs him down to break the hold. Brogue Kick misses and there’s the Armbreaker AGAIN. Sheamus almost taps but makes the ropes with his feet instead. The corner enziguri misses for Del Rio and the Brogue Kick finishes clean at 14:27.

Rating: B. These matches are fine but there are three problems with the feud. First and foremost, the story is incredibly boring. I mean, they’re REALLY boring. Second, Sheamus is not going to tap out to the Armbreaker. It’s flat out not going to happen, just like 99.99% of all heel submission holds in world title matches. It just does not happen in the WWE. Third, Sheamus has beaten him twice coming into this so what was the point of a third match? This feud needs to be over now, just like it needed to be over a month ago. Still though, pretty good match.

Video on the National Guard which has some members here tonight.

We recap Punk vs. Cena. Punk has been champion for about ten months but he thinks he can’t get respect because of Cena. Tonight he gets to define his reign, whatever that is supposed to mean.

Heyman is in the ring and praises Punk, saying that Punk has described himself as a Paul Heyman Guy.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk has the old school hoodie on and comes out first. Cena has a new shirt. Punk’s trunks are Yankees colors. My goodness they’re pushing the tar out of this heel turn. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. Punk is getting booed but it’s not 100%. He holds up the title for like a minute before the match starts. It’s a pose off and Cena throws his shirt to the crowd where his dad catches it.

Cena takes him to the mat and Punk’s trunks even have pinstripes on them. Cena gets a quick headlock but it’s released quickly. Cole and JBL keep rattling off stats and histories which is much better than Cole laughing at stuff. A quick release fisherman’s suplex puts Punk down but Punk elbows Cena in the face to escape. Punk takes over with a headlock takeover and the dueling Cena chants begin.

Cena misses a charge in the corner and Punk dropkicks him in the face for two. They’re still in first gear. Punk walks over Cena’s body to get to the corner for some posing. That was awesome and he escapes the AA attempt on top of that. A DDT gets two for Punk and he fires some elbows to Cena’s chest. Off to a chinlock followed by a bridging Indian Deathlock and Heyman has those evil eyes going on.

They head to the floor as Cena tries to get a breather but Punk sends him right back inside. Cena baseball slides him to the floor and throws Punk into the crowd. A suplex on the floor takes Punk down and we head back inside. The AA is countered into a high kick and it’s off to a camel clutch. Back up and Punk fires off some jabs for two. The GTS is escaped and Cena starts his finishing sequence, only to counter the spinning slam into a cross body for two.

Cena avoids the neckbreaker and takes Punk’s head off with a clothesline for two. The Shuffle is blocked and Punk gets two off a neckbreaker. Punk goes up for a cross body but Cena rolls through into an AA attempt but Punk grabs the rope to block. Cena busts out a suicide dive to take Punk out. Not bad at all. Back in and Punk slaps on a very quick Anaconda Vice but Cena gets on top of Punk and puts on the STF. Punk rolls out of that into a Crossface but Cena stands up with it and slams Punk down to escape.

They slug it out with Cena taking over but he walks into a leg lariat. The knee in the corner sets up a clothesline followed by the Macho Elbow for two. Cena counters the GTS into the STF and JBL (I feel like I’m on Sesame Street) freaks out. Punk gets to the rope and the GTS hits clean for two. A kick to the head gets two and Punk slaps him in the face. GTS and AA are escaped but Cena hits the spinning slam and Shuffle followed by the AA for a VERY close two. Heyman looks like he’s 13 and finding a Playboy.

Cena goes up but misses the top rope Fameasser and there’s the high kick for ANOTHER close two. They’re in the main event slugout mode now and it’s great stuff. Punk hits some shots to the face and a spinning backfist. A knee to the head gets two and Punk goes up, only to miss a moonsault. It wouldn’t have hit even if Cena had stayed in the same place. AA is countered and a not so great GTS gets two.

Punk tries a Rock Bottom for two. Cena hits an AA out of nowhere for two. Cena puts him on the middle rope and tries a belly to back superplex but Punk knocks him off. John runs right back up and hits a middle rope German for the pin and the title at 26:54. Both of their shoulders were down and I think you know where this is going.

Yep the referee is saying not so fast (my friend) and it’s a draw.

Rating: A-. While it’s not as good as MITB (that’s an unfair expectation though) and a bit below Summerslam if I remember that match right, this was still top shelf stuff. The ending sets up another match in the Cell where it belongs and I’d certainly like to see another match between these two. I’m not wild on the ending but it makes perfect sense. Great match too.

Punk clocks Cena with the belt.

Overall Rating: A-. This was an excellent show with nothing bad on it at all. The worst match was probably the Divas and that was pretty much fine. Most importantly of all though: they treated the belts like something that mattered tonight and it made a noticeable difference. JBL on commentary was great and Bryan/Kane are still great. You had two really good matches and a bunch of other solid ones. Very good show here and probably their best PPV since Wrestlemania.

Results

The Miz b. Sin Cara, Rey Mysterio and Cody Rhodes – Miz pinned Rhodes after a Skull Crushing Finale

Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth – Kane pinned Kingston after a top rope splash

Antonio Cesaro b. Zack Ryder – Neutralizer

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Eve Torres b. Layla – Spinning Neckbreaker

Sheamus b. Alberto Del Rio – Brogue Kick

John Cena vs. CM Punk went to a draw

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2003
Location: Carolina Coliseum, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I can understand asking for a 2002 Raw, but 2003? Why would you want to subject yourself to that? I don’t get wrestling fans sometimes. Anyway, this is the go home show for Unforgiven which had a main event of……Goldberg vs. HHH I believe? A check of that would say I’m right, as well as saying that I need to get a life. Let’s get to it.

Eric Bischoff and HHH are in the back and there’s going to be a going away party for Goldberg tonight because HHH is going to destroy him on Sunday.

Theme song. Across the Nation was as good a theme as they’ve ever had.

As the show opens, Jericho and Christian are in the ring with signs demanding that Stone Cold must go. This is an official protest you see. Jericho does the talking and says that Austin is a menace and a horrible GM. Christian says Austin is a joke because he’s keeping Christian off PPVs. They try to start a Stone Cole Must Go chant and here’s Austin. Austin talks about how Jericho slapped him on the back and eventually hurt his feelings. The idea here is that Austin cannot attack anyone unless provoked and he really wants to beat someone up.

Austin says that Christian will be defending on Sunday (that takes about 30 seconds) but doesn’t name an opponent. Instead he’s interested in getting someone to provoke him but as he pulls his fist back, he tells Christian to do it instead. Jericho gets in Austin’s face again and wants the shot at Christian on Sunday. Austin says ok but Jericho has to win the following match first.

Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Jericho

Christian tries to get in a cheap shot but gets kicked down instead. Jericho gets dumped to the floor and taken out by a dive as we take a fast break. Back with Van Dam hitting a forearm and the cartwheel moonsault for two. A standing rana (called a moonsault by JR for some reason) gets two for Van Dam so he goes up, only to be shoved off the top by Christian.

Back in and Jericho puts on a chinlock as the fans chant for RVD. Rob fights up and hits a spinwheel kick and that stepover kick of his followed by Rolling Thunder. A flying kick off the top gets two but Jericho rolls through a monkey flip. The Walls don’t work so Jericho hits a sleeper drop for two. Rob tries a springboard kick but the referee gets kicked in the face. Well of course he does. The Lionsault and Five Star both hit knees so Christian comes in and hits both of them with the title so it’s a draw.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but Jericho was really needing to get the to the Trish storyline to get a recharge at this point. Christian would stay at about this level for awhile until he left for TNA for a few years. Van Dam is Van Dam and that’s about all there is to him. The match itself wasn’t bad but it’s nothing we haven’t seen them do way better at other times.

Austin makes it a triple threat. You know, LIKE EVERY OTHER TRIPLE THREAT.

Video of Goldberg beating Hogan on Nitro.

Spike Dudley vs. Rob Conway

Spike is in a neckbrace and his brothers fight the other members of La Resistance into the crowd. Conway hits a neckbreaker and wins in about 20 seconds.

Post match Conway powerbombs Spike through a table before the Dudleys make the save. The Dudleys would win the tag titles Sunday in a handicap tables match.

Coach and Al Snow suck up to Bischoff but he blows them off as some chick from Tough Enough gives him a note saying there are two women here. I have a bad feeling about this. Regarding Snow and Coach, see they’re the Heat commentators and want to be the Raw commentators so there’s a tag match between the two of them and JR/King on Sunday for the Raw commentary job. Somehow WWE isn’t sure why no one liked 2003.

The two women are of course Moolah and Mae. We’re in South Carolina so you knew this was coming. Moolah wants a match for her 80^th birthday. Austin pops in and says do it and tells Eric to kiss Moolah for luck. Mae Young is there, so you should know what comes next.

Victoria vs. Fabulous Moolah

Victoria hits both Moolah and Mae, but the distraction of Mae lets Moolah roll her up in thirty seconds. That would be two matches that combined to last less than 60 seconds.

Post match Victoria beats both of them up but Randy Orton comes out to save for some reason. Then he realizes they’re legends and RKO’s Moolah.

Goldust/Lance Storm vs. Mark Henry/Rodney Mack

This is when Storm was “just having fun” and would come to the ring dancing to hip hop music. Whoever asked me to review this show, I’d advise you to NOT REQUEST ANOTHER ONE LIKE THIS. Teddy Long manages the team you would expect him to manage, which may or may not be called Thuggin N Buggin Enterprises. Storm and Mack start things off and the fans chant boring, which is the idea behind Storm’s new character. See, Austin told him he was boring and to get a personality.

Storm takes Mack down but Henry hits him in the back of the head to take over. A splash crushed Storm and it’s off to Goldust who almost immediately gets caught in the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin. This actually broke 1:50, so we’re getting closer to a match that’s actually long enough to rate (even the first match barely was as a lot of that was in a lot of that was in a commercial). This would be Goldust’s last match on Raw for about three years.

Evolution (minus Batista who is recovering from injury) is in the back planning for the party for Goldberg later. Orton has to take care of something and runs into Shawn who he faces Sunday. Orton says Shawn made his career out of being a stepping stone and Sunday, he’s going to use Shawn as a stepping stone. Shawn slaps Randy in the face and says Orton better step hard.

Hurricane tries to teach Rosey to fly. Rosey gets a cab instead.

Molly and Gail Kim say their handicap match tonight with Trish is now No Holds Barred. Sure why not.

Here are Kane and Shane McMahon to sign the contract for their last man standing match on Sunday. Shane says he’s taking Kane down on Sunday and signs. There goes the table and the fight is on. Shane hits Kane low several times and gets in a pair of chair shots. With Kane down, Shane pulls the cover off an announce table at ringside that is apparently only here for this segment (JR and King broadcast from up by the stage at this point). Shane puts Kane on the table and hits the big elbow to drive Kane through it.

Gail Kim/Molly Holly vs. Trish Stratus

No Holds Barred just because. Trish hits a quick double neckbreaker to start and gets down to one on one with Molly. You know, because they have to tag in a no holds barred match. I will say this: Molly is really good looking with black hair. Trish kicks Molly in the face and hits the Stratusphere before it’s off to Gail. Kim takes over with a clothesline and a middle rope legdrop for two. Some heel double teaming allows for a Molly handspring elbow for two. Apparently Molly is Women’s Champion. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Trish rops Molly while trying a spinebuster. The villains double team Trish and the Molly Go Round pins her.

Rating: F. When you hear the words “no holds barred”, you expect more than a generic bad handicap match. The only thing good about this was the girls all looking good, which was the case for most Divas matches back in the day. This division needed a shot in the arm and it needed one in a hurry.

Post match the beating continues and a chair is grabbed, but here’s the returning Lita to make the save. She’s been gone over a year due to a neck injury. If nothing else she looks great in a black bra and tiny shorts.

Post match Gail and Molly are in the back with Eric. Eric says he fired Lita but Austin comes in and says he rehired her. There’s a tag match for Sunday. Gail: “I slept with the wrong general manager.”

Here are Coach and Snow dressed as JR and King respectively. They go to the broken announce table as they’re going to give us a preview of what Raw is like next week. Yeah, THIS is one of the top matches at Unforgiven.

Test vs. Val Venis

Test has Stacy with him as his reluctant love slave or something like that. Test makes Stacy sit down in a chair after hitting Val a few times. Val escapes the pumphandle slam and hits a Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Val loads up the Money Shot but Test kicks the referee into the ropes. There’s the Pumphandle Slam but Stacy pulls Test to the floor. Scott Steiner, Stacy’s alleged savior, comes out to distract Test and Stacy crotches her client on the ropes. Val hits a full nelson slam for the surprise pin. Coach and Snow were very annoying on commentary here. Steiner would turn heel and use Stacy just like Test was soon.

Steiner beats up Test post match but Test gets Stacy before he leaves.

Lawler comes out and asks to fight Snow right now. The match is after a break.

Al Snow vs. Jerry Lawler

Coach and JR are on commentary here as Lawler controls with some very basic stuff. They slug it out and King hits a DDT for two. Snow comes back with a slam but a suplex is countered into a small package for the pin. This was the last match of the show people. This is the main event. Let that sink in.

Coach hits JR before bailing.

Austin runs into Evolution and says HHH is having the Goldberg party by himself.

Here’s HHH for the farewell. He asks the crowd for a Goldberg chant but they’re not interested. We get music and confetti and balloons because this needs to get stupider. HHH says there are no such things as dynasties in wrestling but he’s the one constant. Apparently the one constant isn’t the mic as it goes out yet we can still hear it on TV. With a new mic, HHH shows off a portrait of Goldberg being bloodied by Evolution. This is going nowhere by the way. Now we get VIDEO of the beating! Goldberg finally pops up on screen and says he’ll win the title before coming out and gorilla pressing HHH to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Despite that TEN MINUTE closing segment, I have zero desire to see either the main event or any of the matches on the show. There are two matches on this show that were long enough to rate: one ended in a draw and one was a no holds barred match that had nothing out of the ordinary. Other than that you have all kinds of stuff like Moolah and Test and the Spike match. Horrible show here and I want nothing to do with Unforgiven or Raw in 2003. Naturally the whole year is on my schedule.

Here’s Unforgiven if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/11/03/unforgiven-2003-i-was-wrong-2002-isnt-the-worst-year-ever-for-wwe/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

No Surrender 2008
Date: September 14, 2008
Location: General Motors Centre, Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

Someone requested this and I needed to do a TNA show anyway so here you are. This is kind of an awkward time for TNA as the Mafia hasn’t formed yet and there isn’t a big angle going on. The main event is supposed to be a four way with Joe vs. Booker vs. Cage vs. Angle but Booker had travel issues of some sort and can’t be here. Other than that we have an MMA match because EVERYONE that watches wrestling wants to see MMA right? Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how some say these people are performers and how this may not be a sport. Just let us know it’s fake guys! That all isn’t true apparently and it took a lot for all four guys in the main event to get here tonight.

Oh one thing more: like I said Booker was never here. The fans on PPV were told that. The 3,500 people in the arena were left in the dark about it and were confused. Nice guys up there in TNA. This is what I mean by not thinking.

The stupid intro video is still going now and runs over three minutes. GET ON WITH THE SHOW!

Here’s Sting. Not for a match but because he wants to talk I guess. He’s on the verge of a heel turn but is still very popular because he’s Sting. Naturally we need to turn him heel right Russo? Sting talks about how good it is to be back in Canada and says he’s in the hiz-ouse. Oh sweet merciful crap don’t start talking like that Stinger. Big ovation for Sting who has to pause because of all the cheering.

He gets the winner of the main event tonight at Bound For Glory but that’s not what he’s here to talk about. Instead he wants to talk about respect. Sting keeps flubbing his lines and you can tell he’s scrambling for some reason. He goes on a rant about respect and how some of the guys behind the curtain have no respect for anyone at all. Sting compares himself to Bret Hart and says that he’s fighting for the same thing as Bret did. He’s not retiring until guys like AJ and Joe know what respect is.

We’re over 10 minutes into the show now and we haven’t even started the first entrance yet.

Christian got here earlier today. Well good to see that he didn’t get lost an hour away from his hometown.

Booker won’t be here tonight. Again, the live fans were never told about this. There was a hurricane or something like that.

Now we run down the already purchased show to waste more time.

HOKEY SMOKE IT’S A MATCH AND WE’RE ONLY FOURTEEN MINUTES IN!

Rock N Rave Infection/Christy Hemme vs. Prince Justice Brotherhood

The Brotherhood is Super Eric (Young in a bad superhero gimmick), Stone Cold Shark Boy and Curry Man in one of the dumbest gimmicks even by TNA standards. The Infection is a bad rock band gimmick that played Guitar Hero controllers and had the smoking hot Christy Hemme as their manager. Eric vs. Rave to start with Eric taking over.

Eric gets a plancha to the floor which gets two back in the ring. Lance Rock comes in which gets his team nowhere so it’s off to Shark Boy. Thesz Press takes down Rock again as the good guys are dominating. Shark Boy is the same Steve Austin parody that was on Impact the other night. Over to Curry Man who gets a pop for no apparent reason other than a potential lack of oxygen in the arena.

Curry Man tags in Christy and we’re in a comedy match officially. He shoves her off and then realizes where his head was so he offers to go back into it again. Funny spot. Off to Shark Boy and Rave. Back drop sends Shark Boy (I refused to refer to him as Sharky like West and Tenay keep doing) to the floor as momentum changes.

Jawbreaker almost gets Shark Boy a tag but Rock N Rave get something close to a 3D but into a knee instead of a cutter. Christy comes in and is dropped onto Shark Boy by Rock. Cold tag to Curry Man (I thought he was hot and spicy?) who gets a flying hip to Rock. He and Hemme dance a bit and she gets kissed. Rollup gets two but Rock drills Curry so that Christy can hit the Flying Firecrotch Guillotine (don’t ask) for two. Chummer (Stunner) to Christy and a double Death Valley Driver to the guys from Curry Man end this.

Rating: C+. Basic fast paced and fun match to start us off here which is often times the best idea to open a show. Christy was the only good thing about the Infection as she looked great as the groupie. This was just here for comedy and to warm the crowd up and it did that rather well. Good opener.

Recap of Kong vs. ODB. Kong had been completely dominant and ODB is the only Knockout that isn’t terrified of her. Naturally that means falls count anywhere. Don’t you see the clear connection?

Awesome Kong vs. ODB

Funny sign: “Kong Ate My Sign” and there’s a chuck out of it which looks like teeth marks. I’m still not sure I get the point of ODB but she got pops (put her on TNN!) so I guess that makes sense. Saed, Kong’s manager, jumps ODB during her entrance/playing to the crowd/wasting time and we’re off.

ODB fights Kong off and apparently falls count anywhere means hardcore as there’s a table. At least ODB has pants on here. We head into the crowd as this is going to be a big old brawl. Naturally you can’t see much but ODB being in blue-green helps a lot. Trash can to Kong has her in trouble. Up to the ramp where Kong tosses ODB around and gets a slam for two.

All Kong here as ODB feels herself up after a chop for no apparent reason. Thesz Press on the floor gets two for ODB. Hey let’s spank the overly large woman for no apparent reason. We get ready to use the table that they set up earlier. ODB gets a chair from somewhere and gets a shot in with it for two.

The fans want tables. I wonder if they’ll settle for just one. Kong reverses a slam into an attempted Awesome Bomb but another counter by ODB. It winds up failing as Kong continues taking over. Kong goes up but gets caught in a powerbomb as Saed’s distraction fails.

ODB out to the floor where Saed hammers away. Apparently ODB took the burqa (scarf over the face) off on Impact and Saed isn’t happy. The less fat one fights her off and tries to come off the top but jumps into a chokeslam. Ok scratch the chokeslam as it’s a splash in the corner and a spinning backfist.

Instead of covering though she and Saed set up another table in the corner. ODB gets a shot from her flask (as in a drink) as West says she needs some Liquid Courage (doesn’t sound bad right now. When’s their next show anyway?). She spits it in Kong’s face which doesn’t mean anything as a spinebuster through the table from Kong ends this.

Rating: D+. It’s ok but it’s another of those silly “hardcore” brawls that WWF perfected in the late 90s. Definitely not a bad match but these two got kind of boring to see fight over and over again. Saed never really clicked that well and I’m not sure I got the point of her other than as an aide to Kong. Not bad but pretty weak overall.

The absolutely gorgeous Lauren is with Christian who says this is TNA, not the Hills. Uh, ok? OH! The Hills was a really bad reality show on MTV at this time. Totally forgot about that and it gives me hope for Jersey Shore dying soon. He’s a wrestler that has sacrificed everything for this business and he owes everything he has to it. It all started an hour from here and everyone told him he’d never do it and never make it to the top which he proved wrong. Tonight is more important than when he won his first two world titles because tonight it’s at home. Great stuff here. Generic, but great.

We recap Team 3D vs. Abyss/Morgan. This is during the Abyss loves pain thing which went on for like a year and stopped being interesting/making sense about three days in. He’s been in an institution for six months and is in control of his violent urges now apparently. Morgan is there just because he wants to be I guess.

Team 3D vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan

Abyss has the gray mask on now. Abyss vs. Ray to start us off. Wow that sounds awful beyond words. Mike points out how rare it is to have the Dudleys being at a weight disadvantage which is rather true. Ray with a Rock Bottom for two. Off to D-Von and we actually hear that Abyss has been a world champion. You never hear about that anymore and I’m not quite sure why.

Morgan and Abyss take over so the Dudleys say they’re out of here. Morgan goes after them and the fight is on again. Back in the ring and D-Von works over the knee of Abyss. Off to Ray who does the same which makes me think they’re needing a nap already. The fans, again, want tables. Morgan comes in and the fight is finally on.

Not much of a match so far as this is a lot of laying around and bad brawling. Morgan takes D-Von down with a big shoulder block as this finally speeds up a bit. Morgan does Old School to massive booing. He dives off the top to hit D-Von with a cross body which gets the crowd behind him again.

Morgan sets for the Hellavator on D-Von but Johnny Devine, the associate of Team 3D, pops Morgan with a chair from behind for two. Everything is already broken down if you didn’t get that yet. Double clothesline takes down 3D and brings in Abyss. Shock Treatment to Devine and hits ten punches in the corner to D-Von. Odd sight for some reason.

In a very impressive spot the Dudleys manage to get a Doomsday Device on Abyss. That was incredibly impressive. Morgan saves and Abyss is up seconds later. Chokeslam to D-Von gets two. Abyss picks up a chair but can’t manage to swing it. D-Von gets it but has it punched into his face by Morgan and the Black Hole Slam ends it.

Rating: C. Eh this wasn’t too bad. It’s the Dudleys vs. some random pairing so it’s kind of hard to really get into it. Morgan had so many random partners (ok so it was more like two) that it was hard to differentiate between them. Nothing special here but it wasn’t anything horrible so we’ll say it’s right in the middle.

Post match Ray cracks Morgan with a chair and does the same to Abyss but Ray puts the chair in Abyss’ hands and I think you know what the idea here is.

Various friends of the people in the X Title triple threat say their friend will win. It sounds like the beginning of a really stupid puzzle.

X–Division Title: Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Petey Williams vs. Consequences Creed

Let’s get this over with as it’s a random EVIL Muslim against two other guys. Williams is champion coming in. Creed is some big time American hero character like Apollo Creed. Williams is the home country favorite and gets a modest reaction. Rhaka Khan is with him for some reason. Sheik hits the floor early so it’s Williams vs. Creed.

Earl Hebner is the referee so we get the YOU SCREWED BRET chants. Bashir back in now and it’s your usual mostly entertaining spot fest for awhile now. Big dive by Creed takes both guys out and then he celebrates with the fans who likely should hate him. Two minutes in and the fans think this is awesome already. Williams gets a slingshot Codebreaker on Creed.

This is so spotty it’s unreal. By spotty I mean it’s do this move then go onto the next one. It’s fun, don’t get me wrong, but at the same time it’s not as fun as it should be as it could be better structured. This is because of Shane Sewell being an overly fair referee so it’s supposed to just be Creed but Bashir said there was something fishy going on and it’s a triple threat.

Williams takes down both guys and the fans are into him. Basically the idea is that if he hits the Canadian Destroyer the roof will go off. A double one doesn’t work as both guys realize they have a guy helping them break it up and break it up with ease. Bashir gets a middle rope suplex on Williams but Creed dives in with a double guillotine legdrop for two. Destroyer to Creed is teased but Creed counters.

Williams gets a Sharpshooter to Bashir and of course we reference Montreal because EVERYONE wants to hear about that again right? That nearly 45 seconds of selling by Creed might be more than the whole match combined. The selling here is really quite bad and that’s what’s hurting it a lot. With all this lack of selling why should I buy into the moves? As I say that Williams gets the running Destroyer (flip Piledriver) and Bashir steals the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. It’s ok, but the problem with TNA is the same that WWE had: why in the world should I care about these lightweight matches? There’s no story to it other than a referee that has nothing to do with this match. It’s just there. There were some nice spots and some cool moves, but this match came and went and I’m not going to remember it in fifteen minutes or so, which is the truth of almost every X Division match that doesn’t have AJ in it. The same is true today and that’s not good.

Samoa Joe, the world champion, is here, over an hour into the show.

We recap the Knockouts Title match between Wilde and Love. Angelina is a witch and wants the title. That’s about it.

Knockouts Title: Taylor Wilde vs. Angelina Love

If nothing else Velvet looks great in more or less a bikini bottom. Oh and they have Cute Kip with them to annoy me. Wilde has one of those annoying videos where they show clips of her coming to the ring while she comes to the ring so you can never tell which is which. Wilde gets on the mic and says she isn’t going to be against three people tonight and brings out Rhyno. I get why I’ve never heard her talk otherwise.

Big brawl to start with both chicks landing punches and rolling around on the mat. Well you can’t argue they’re not giving the people what the want. Traci Brooks comes out to watch the match and take notes. She’s in charge of the division here for no apparent reason. Out to the floor where Velvet drills Taylor with a makeup kit to give Angelina the control. Angelina runs Taylor’s eyes along the top rope. It would help if there hadn’t been a clear 8 inches between her face and the rope but take what you can get I suppose.

Taylor comes back a bit and attempts a suplex from the middle rope. Love counters into kind of almost a bad Gordbuster off the middle rope to take over again. Taylor gets a quick rollup for two. She kicks Angelina’s head off and Kip comes in. Rhyno Gores him as Velvet gets on the apron and then knocked off so a Northern Lights Suplex ends Angelina.

Rating: D+. Pretty weak little match here but it wasn’t completely awful. This was another match when Angelina was still pretty bad in the ring. She would get a lot better, but that doesn’t mean that there was heat on any of these matches, because there certainly was none to be seen here.

We recap Lethal vs. Dutt in the Ladder of Love match. Both love So Cal Val and Val is tired of being in the middle of it. Lethal proposed to her and told her either she stop associating with Dutt or he’s gone. The solution of course: a ladder match to get her, whatever that entails. In other words, a single match is supposed to determine her feelings for one of these guys. What a freaking witch.

Oh and I almost forgot: these three were supposed to be the modern Hogan/Savage/Liz. Let that sink in for a minute.

Jay Lethal vs. Sonjay Dutt

Aww they both brought flowers. If nothing else we can look at Val in a blue dress. Oh and if you can’t see the turn coming from a mile away here, you’re blind. Ladder of Love sounds like a really bad reality show that gets a big rating on network TV. It’s of course a big gymnastics exhibition to start us off. And now that we’re into a big feud and gimmick match, we’re told that Salinas has been attacked by Jackie in the bathroom and is gone for the night. How riveting.

Dutt is sent into the ladder early on as Lethal has dominated the entire time. Lethal gets a back drop onto the ladder which is bridged between the barricade and the ring to half kill Dutt. Lethal goes up but Dutt gets a springboat to get onto the ladder and make the save. The fans think this is awesome. Not entirely true but it’s getting there. Lethal puts a ladder on top of a ladder so it would be like a T if the vertical ladder was closed.

Sonjay crotches Lethal and West says Lethal is wearing a ladder as pants. Lethal gets caught in a Tree of Woe with his head in a ladder so Dutt hits a baseball slide to more or less kill him. Dutt gets some chairs because that’s what heels do I guess. Out to the floor now where Lethal can’t get a powerbomb onto a ladder but Dutt can get a neckbreaker onto said ladder.

This is pretty good stuff so far. West: We should put a woman on the line every time! Naturally Lethal can get back in almost immediately and we have a pair of ladders set up now. Lethal manages to get stuck laid across two ladders so Dutt hooks a camel clutch on top of the ladders in a pretty cool looking visual.

Lethal manages to flip Dutt over so he crashes to the mat. Jay’s foot is caught in the ladder though so Val comes in to help him out. Dutt gets in her face until Lethal helps her. While he’s checking on her Dutt tries to get up the ladder. Lethal chases him and naturally Val hits him low so that Dutt can get the win. They make out post match.

Rating: B. Rather fun match here with both guys hammering each other rather well. The ending was of course about as predictable as anything you could ask for but the buildup to it worked rather well. This more or less ended the interaction between these two and Dutt never meant anything anymore.

JB talks to Angle about the problems with Booker who isn’t here tonight. Angle says Joe’s name will never be in the same book as his. Christian sucks too because he’s from Canada. Oh and he remembers Jarrett too because they have to be joined at the hip every 8 seconds.

We recap LAX vs. Beer Money and their apparent hardcore match last month which looks rather softcore to me. Beer Money messed up Homicide’s eye with a beer bottle so Hernandez says a lot of incomprehensible things to be all tough.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. LAX

This should be pretty good at least due to the talent in there. It’s the only thing that either guy in LAX is good at so this is as good as it’s getting. Beer Money is still kind of new here apparently and just won the titles last month. LAX has Hector Guerrero (Eddie’s more talented and dead ringer of a brother) with them. Jackie is with Beer Money to make things all the more annoying.

Storm has one of those football helmets with drinks in it. Homicide and Roode start wich Roode running early. I still don’t see the future world champion in him that everyone else claims to see and I’ve always found Homicide overrated so this isn’t exactly ideal conditions for me. Homicide jumps him but runs into a shot to the eye for Roode to take over again.

Hernandez makes a blind (ironic no?) tag in and drills Roode with a slingshot shoulder block. Jackie’s distraction lets the champions take over so that Hernandez can be beaten down. Off to Storm as we hear about how awesome Beer Money is. Hernandez almost gets a powerbomb on Storm but Roode gets a chop block to take him down. Double suplex has SuperMex in trouble.

Does anyone else laugh at a referee named Slick Johnson? The fans like LAX despite Roode being Canadian. The champions keep Hernandez from tagging out and call Homicide a very bad word and flip him off. Homicide gets a tag that is so hot that I missed the reaction to it. Have some enthusiasm there fans. DDT from the second rope gets two on Roode.

Spinebuster gets two for Roode as Hernandez saves. Everything breaks down with LAX in control here. Hernandez backdrops Homicide over the top and out to the floor to take out Roode. A big dive by Hernandez doesn’t happen since Storm spits beer in his face. Hector and Jackie get into it on the floor. A beer bottle shot by Homicide misses Storm.

Big dive by Hernandez takes out Storm so we’re back to Homicide vs. Roode in the ring. They counter finishers for a bit until the Gringo Cutter drills Roode for no cover. Gringo Killer is blocked by powder from Jackie (I guess the white stuff on his face is undetectable or something) and a Fisherman’s suplex from Roode ends Homicide in a rather short match.

Rating: D+. I didn’t like this one at all for some reason. An 8 minute tag title match feels far too short for some reason. There was zero heat from the crowd on the tags or the big spots at all which hurt it a lot also. The champions never seemed to be in anything resembling danger at all which hurt it a lot. Pretty weak match here and it didn’t click at all.

We recap Frank Trigg vs. AJ for one of his two matches in this company. Since he’s now a wrestler, this is an MMA match. No word on why they’re fighting, but they certainly are. It isn’t helping Trigg that he’s nearly a dead ringer for Angle.

Frank Trigg vs. AJ Styles

Yeah because this is going to work very well. Trigg gets on the mic and somehow he’s managing to kill this crowd even further. He cuts one of the most painfully generic heel promos I’ve ever heard while holding the American Flag. SHUT UP AND GET THE HECK ON WITH THIS!!! The fans don’t care so of course Trigg keeps talking. FINALLY AJ gets out here to breathe some life into this place.

They’re doing five minute rounds here to make it all the stupid. I don’t watch wrestling to see MMA. If I wanted to see that I’d watch MMA! Why is that so complicated for so many wrestling companies? Are we supposed to buy that AJ would have a chance at all against Trigg in a legit MMA fight? You can only win by knockout or tap out here.

Naturally, Trigg owns AJ for the most part here, making AJ look completely weak and that there is no skill at all in wrestling. Nice job TNA. We hit the floor for a bit where AJ looks even stupider. Trigg gets about his 9th takedown in maybe two and a half minutes as the fans are clearly getting restless. What a great way to use one of the best guys on the roster!

The fans want wrestling to the shock of no one that thinks these things through. What’s TNA”s next great move? SHOW THE FANS CHANTING THAT! AJ has hit maybe two punches the whole time. The fans are booing the living heck out of this. LOUD Fire Russo chant now as Trigg spanks AJ after about the 112th takedown. The announcers try to say that Trigg is gaining respect for AJ or something like that. AJ gets an armbar to end the round and the bell rings so everyone thinks AJ won by tapout but it’s just a rest period instead to further tick the fans off.

The second round starts….and AJ accidentally hits Trigg low for a no contest. OH FREAKING NO! We really sat through six minutes of this nonsense to get to this? WOW. AJ hits the floor to be all ticked off. The fans chant THIS IS BULL as everyone is right. AJ wears Trigg out with a kendo stick post match to half booing/half cheering as this continues but it also was the awful ending. Trigg hasn’t been seen since.

Rating: P. As in PAY ATTENTION WRESTLING BOOKERS BECAUSE FANS DO NOT WANT TO WATCH FREAKING MMA ON A WRESTLING SHOW!!! GET IT THROUGH YOUR FREAKING HEADS ALREADY!!! This was awful and made AJ look awful in case you couldn’t tell.

AJ shouts at the announcers that he’s a wrestler and that he doesn’t do that stuff. Holy shooting Batman!

Joe says that he’s like an animal with enemies closing in on him from all around. He talks about how he has no respect for Sting who has nothing to do with the main event. He talks about how Sting is never at any of the house shows because he’s here for the fame and not for the hard work. Good stuff here from the fat man.

Overly dramatic video about the world title match which is a triple threat with the challengers qualifying. And remember, the fans DO NOT KNOW Booker won’t be there. He’s in the video too so it’s not really helping things.

TNA World Title: Christian Cage vs. Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle

Each guy gets a brief video and then their actual entrance. It’s coming off like they have too much time on their hands which is odd as they had a good deal of matches and the tag title match was short. Sting comes out after Joe and the fight is on in the aisle! Could they make it any more obvious that this is the main event of BFG? AJ comes out to pull Joe off as we waste some more time.

Now we do big match intros. The introductions started almost ten minutes ago once these are done. The Instant Classic is a great nickname. Angle gets double teamed to start with Christian hitting a jumping back elbow off the middle rope. The idea is that Booker was supposed to more or less make it an unofficial tag so Angle is in trouble. Joe and Christian square off in the middle which I guess is supposed to be epic but it just isn’t.

Christian slaps him and the fight is on. Leg lariat takes the Canadian down as Angle is still down. There’s the bald guy and Joe grabs the Clutch out of nowhere which West thinks is a cover for no apparent reason. Ankle lock to Christian after Christian saved Angle. What a jerk! Angle suplexes Christian over the top and there goes the Canadian’s knee.

We hit the chinlock now as we’re really hammering in that whole waste time thing. Christian gets up and crotches Angle on the post before hitting a cross body on Joe for two. Angle pops back up as I guess his Olympic balls aren’t hurt by hitting a post. He gets a German on Joe and then snaps up the ropes to hit a belly to belly on Christian. Unprettier is blocked into another German as this is going very, very quickly and not in the best way you would think of.

Joe starts busting out Germans to Angle. Christian gets out of the MuscleBuster. Tower of Doom looks pretty good and Joe gets two on both guys. You would think that would somehow be more than three but not quite I guess. Angle tries to get a German to Christian off the apron to the floor but Christian counters into the Pendulum Kick. Angle grabs the ankle and jumps over to get it on in the ring.

Christian saves so he gets an ankle lock. Angle is like screw it and puts it on both guys at once. MuscleBuster to Christian but Angle distracts the referee so there’s a delayed cover for two. Joe hits a huge corkscrew tope con hilo to take out the challengers on the floor. It’s a cool looking move but I really want this match to end and soon. Back in the ring Angle gets the Slam to Joe and Christian adds a splash and the Unprettier but Angle pulls out the referee.

Angle drills the referee and everyone is down. Totally unprotected chairs shot to the head of Christian and Joe set up the ankle lock on Joe. I hate those things as they add nothing at all to the match and can hurt people badly. At least get a hand up or something guys. Jarrett comes down and drills Angle with the guitar, allowing Joe to hit a MuscleBuster to get the pin on Angle and retain. Jarrett raises Joe’s hand to end the show.

Rating: B-. Good match for the most part but the pacing was way off for the vast majority of it which hurts it a lot. There more or less was no building part or beginning part with the vast majority of the fifteen minutes feeling like one really long ending sequence. It’s not bad at all and some of the spots are good, but it’s more or less a throwaway match which isn’t what you want to end a PPV. Also Joe was about as obviously going to win as possible here.

Overall Rating: D. This show took me four days to get through. The wrestling is weak, the matches are forgettable at best and it’s a long commercial for Bound For Glory. The main point of this show seemed to be Joe making sure he got to Sting at BFG and everyone else just making sure they had spots there. This is a show that if you didn’t see you would miss absolutely nothing. The ladder match is pretty good but it’s absolutely nothing worth going out of your way to see. Totally boring show but not completely bad. Watch it if you can’t sleep.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Before we get to this, I want to apologize in advance for the last hour of this show. My mind wasn’t focused on the show but I don’t think anyone was.

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 10, 2012
Location: Bell Center, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

There are two major things going on tonight. First of all, we’ll have the continuation and explanation of Heyman driving Punk away last week to end the show. The other is that Bret Hart is going to be in Montreal so you know the crowd is going to go nuts. This is the go home show for the PPV on Sunday so tonight is likely going to be a lot of pushing towards that show. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Bret to open the show. The fans give him a very long ovation and Bret talks about how dark that day in Montreal was. The fans got him through that time and he thanks them deeply. That’s about it and here’s Punk with less hair. Punk complains about Bret having a big ego and wants to know what would have happened if it had been him in Montreal instead of Shawn. Bret says Punk would have been in the Sharpshooter with his feet touching his head.

Punk says the WWE wouldn’t exist because he would have beaten Bret without Vince, then jumped to WCW and there wouldn’t have been an Attitude Era and the company would have died. Bret says that he’s the best there is, was and ever will be which gets on Punk’s nerves. Punk takes a jab at Lawler and in a bizarre moment, Bret defends Jerry. We get a clip of the end of last week’s show with Punk coming back and leaving with Heyman.

Punk asks Bret if Cena is here tonight and is going to save Bret if things get too heavy. Bret mentions the word respect and Punk goes off on him. Eventually Punk says he’ll put Cena to sleep on Sunday. Bret: “Just like you’re putting these people to sleep here tonight.” Punk says nothing else of note and we’re done. I’m not sure if I liked this or not. It was better than the Lawler stuff, but at the end of the day it’s the same thing he’s been saying over and over again.

Pick Brodus, Lawler or Orton to be Punk’s opponent tonight.

Antonio Cesaro/The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth

Cesaro’s five language word tonight is prestige. There’s going to be a battle royal on Sunday’s pre show to determine who gets the shot at Cesaro later in the night. Truth comes in pretty quickly and the tag champs clear the ring with Kofi hitting a bit flip dive to the floor as we take a break. Back with Cesaro holding Truth in a chinlock while Aksana lays on the apron and watches.

Off to Miz who hits the top rope ax handle for two. Such a shame to see a former legendary team like this fighting isn’t it? Truth comes back with a flying kick to take Miz down and there’s the hot tag to Kofi who cleans house. A top rope cross body gets two on Cesaro and Truth takes Miz out with the spinning forearm. Kofi gets rolled up for two but even a handful of tights only gets two for Cesaro. Kingston pops up and Trouble in Paradise gets the pin on Antonio at 8:10.

Rating: C. Just your run of the mill tag match here but it worked well enough. I’m ok with the champions losing here as it’s to set up the Night of Champions PPV, which means focusing on the champions by putting them in one match makes sense. Pretty decent match here and it’s nice to see the tag champions win a match.

We recap Sheamus and Del Rio’s stuff from Friday.

We go to a court deposition about the Otunga/Sheamus/Del Rio ordeal which involves Jewish and Mexican jokes from Sheamus. Otunga lists off some former victims of the Brogue Kick (including Daniel Bryan, making Sheamus answer every question YES in a funny bit) and we get some legal banter that belongs in a parody of A Few Good Men. Then Sheamus Brogue Kicks the camera and says let’s have a party, prompting him to belt out Hava Nagila. This was out there but it was certainly different.

Alicia Fox/Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. Eve Torres/Kaitlyn/Layla

Beth and Kaitlyn start us off and it’s quickly off to Nattie. Kaitlyn gets beaten down and it’s off to Alicia who hits a suplex for two. Off to Layla who cleans house before Eve tags herself in and hits the spinning neckbreaker for the pin on Alicia at 2:33.

AJ is looking a bit psycho when Punk comes up. He doesn’t like that Cena doesn’t have a match tonight and Punk doesn’t know who his own opponent is. He yells at AJ but she doesn’t back down. She leaves and Punk runs into Brodus who might face Punk tonight.

Orton wins the poll in a non shocking landslide.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Punk is in Hart colors which is a weird kind of respect I guess. The champ starts with his traditional headlock to shout spots into Orton’s ear but gets hiptossed down and we stall a bit. Punk stomps him down in the corner and hits a suplex for two. A chinlock stays on Orton for awhile but he fights up and almost gets the RKO. Punk bails to the floor and tries to walk out but Orton makes the save. Orton throws Punk in first so CM dropkicks Randy’s legs out, sending Orton face first into the apron as we take a break.

Back with Punk dropping an elbow for two on Orton. Punk goes up top but Orton channels his dad and superplexes him down. They slug it out from their knees and Orton takes over, but the Elevated DDT is countered by a kick to the head and the springboard clothesline for two. GTS and RKO are countered so Orton hits the backbreaker for two. Now the Elevated DDT hits but as Orton loads up the RKO, here’s Ziggler for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was your usual main event style match which wasn’t bad but it’s also nothing great. I don’t think anyone expected this to be a classic or anything and the ending was pretty predictable, but that’s ok in this case. I’m not wild on the Raw Active stuff because it takes away the reason these guys are fighting, but social media rules the world anymore.

Post match Orton gets double teamed but Lawler makes the save. The four brawl as we head to a break, leading to…..

Randy Orton/Jerry Lawler vs. Dolph Ziggler/CM Punk

Back with Ziggler pounding on Orton in the corner and hitting a neckbreaker for two. Orton comes back with the slingshot suplex and brings in Lawler for a pair of middle rope fists for two. Ziggler dropkicks Jerry down as Punk looks bored out of his mind on the apron. It’s intentional boredom though so at least he’s doing his job properly. Ziggler drops some elbows on Lawler and hooks a chinlock as Punk still hasn’t been in yet. Lawler suplexes out of the hold and it’s hot tag Orton.

He cleans house but the Elevated DDT is countered and Orton is sent to the floor. Here’s Heyman for a chat with Punk but Vickie starts shouting at them. Punk ignores them and keeps talking to Heyman. Heyman hands Punk the title as Ziggler is pounding on Orton in the ring. For no apparent reason Cole has stopped talking.

A Fameasser is countered (we’re watching Punk and Heyman so the match is being seen in the background) but the RKO doesn’t hit. A rollup gets two for Ziggler but he walks into the RKO for the pin at 7:10 shown. Punk was never in the match and walks away with Heyman without caring at all.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but it was more about an angle than a match which is fine in this case. Heyman was the talk of the internet this past week so him coming out here was what everyone was waiting on. This was definitely different which is what Raw has been needing for awhile now.

Punk and Heyman are walking in the back but we still can’t hear what they say. Matt Striker asks them what their relationship is and Punk says he’s a Paul Heyman guy.

We recap the hugging segment from last week in a package that aired on Smackdown.

Bryan and Kane meet in the back but they aren’t sure who sent both of them messages to meet here. Someone set the meeting up and Kane is mad to see him. It’s the doctor who wants to run a checkup. AJ asked the doctor here apparently because they have to trust each other before everything falls apart for them.

Heath Slater wants to face Ryder again after losing last week. Ryder pops up on screen and says he’s not facing Slater. Here’s the real opponent.

Heath Slater vs. Ryback

Slater gets in some offense but poses to the crowd too much. Clothesline, double powerbomb, Shell Shock for the pin at 2:07.

The Prime Time Players have whistles now and come in to see AJ. They aren’t the #1 contenders now because they have to beat Kane and Bryan tonight.

Daniel Bryan/Kane vs. Prime Time Players

Winners get Kofi/Truth on Sunday for the titles. Kane and Titus start things off with the bald guy jumping Kane. Off to Bryan who stays right with Titus to take over. Young comes in with a rollup for two and a double shoulder block from the Players puts Bryan down again. Yong puts on a cravate but Bryan escapes, only to get distracted by the fans. Titus comes in and walks into some kicks but he hits a backbreaker to slow Bryan down again.

There’s a chinlock which doesn’t last long and it’s back to Young. Something is going on at the announce table and the people are all looking at it. The word on the street is that something is very wrong with Lawler and it may be something along the lines of a legit seizure. That’s scary stuff man.

They trade uppercuts before Bryan gets caught in another chinlock. Bryan suplexes Young down but he won’t tag. Bryan misses a Swan Dive and it’s chinlock #3 in the match. Another suplex gets Bryan out of trouble but he still won’t tag. After kicking the tar out of Young, Bryan gets too close to the corner and Kane tags himself in. He cleans house and hits the top rope clothesline on Young but Titus breaks up the chokeslam. After disposing of Titus, Bryan tags himself back, only to get chokeslammed onto Young, sending the anger management buddies to Night of Champions at 8:30.

Rating: D+. The match was pretty dull but this was absolutely the right move. These two had gotten way too much momentum to not do anything on the PPV and it’s not like the Players can’t get put back in later. Not a good match, but it’s 100% the right move to make. Hopefully they win the titles and bring something fun to them again.

We recap the opening segment.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Tyson Kidd

Kidd comes out second which is surprising. Tyson almost immediately takes Del Rio down but can’t get the Sharpshooter. Del Rio hammers away but gets caught in a quick Sharpshooter. He gets the rope on the second try and almost immediately the armbreaker gets the tap out at 2:50.

Del Rio says he’ll win the title.

Cole says Lawler passed out at the announce table. They’re performing CPR and Cole is adamant that this isn’t part of the show. This is real based on everything I can find.

Sheamus vs. David Otunga

Cole isn’t saying anything still. Otunga jumps him to start and I don’t think we’re going to have commentary for awhile. Cole can be seen at the desk with his head on his hand watching the match but he isn’t saying anything. Otunga gets in an early shot but Sheamus pounds him down and the Cloverleaf gets the tap out at 1:28.

Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick post match. This brings out AJ who says….nothing because Booker interrupts her. Booker is conducting an internal investigation and if Sheamus uses the kick before it’s over, he’s stripped of the title.

This is very eerie right now as the show is basically operating like a house show because we’re not sure what’s happening with Lawler. This is legit scary.

Back from a break and Cole still isn’t saying anything. We get a clip from the tag match which I think is after Lawler collapsed. Yeah it’s the ending of the match with Kane chokeslamming Bryan.

The tag champs send out a Tout about keeping the belts on Sunday.

Kane and Bryan are with the doctor and are still arguing. The doctor says they passed a trial. Bryan didn’t appreciate the chokeslam but they won and that’s what matters. An argument breaks out out over whose name comes first in the team name. The doctor suggests Team Friendship, drawing a collective NO.

We get the rundown of the graphics for the matches on Sunday with no commentary.

Cole is back on screen and says Lawler passed out and was stretchered to the back. Lawler has been taken to a hospital in Montreal. He’s receiving oxygen but is breathing on his own. There won’t be any further commentary tonight. That might be the best idea. In advance, I want to apologize if the last part of the review is off. I’m not going to be able to focus that well and I apologize in advance. This is scary stuff and when you see it happen live, it’s hard to take in all at once.

Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

The lack of commentary is eerie. Cody drops down twice early, getting hit once and hitting Rey once. Cody hits the release godrbuster but Cross Rhodes is broken up. They go back and forth for a bit with Rey hitting the sitout bulldog and taking out an interfering Miz before the 619 can hit. Miz’s distraction lets Cross Rhodes get the pin at about 5:00.

Rating: C. This was fine and when you consider how messed up these guys might be, that’s pretty impressive stuff. They have to get people’s minds off what they just saw and that’s not easy no matter what you do. The match was just a match for the most part and I guess they were trying to set up something for Sunday, which they had to do.

Post match Cody hits Cross Rhodes on Miz for no apparent reason. He holds up the title and I think that’s a challenge for Sunday which would be heel vs. heel.

Post break Cole tells us a bit more about what happened to Lawler earlier. Lawler was breathing on his own and now he’s more responsive than he was earlier. He’s reacting to lights being put in his eyes and is in the isolated ER, awaiting a CAT scan.

Here’s Hart for the closing segment. He brings out Cena and says that he sees a lot of himself and Shawn Michaels in Cena and Punk. Cena talks about how he’s nowhere near those two and he thanks Bret for the compliment. Punk isn’t like Shawn because Punk isn’t always himself. Hart wants to know what Cena is going to do to shut Punk up.

Cue the champ who is annoyed at the lack of respect. Cena calls Punk out and asks for a fight but Punk says Cena is the biggest phony in the company. Punk talks about how the two in the ring have been surpassed by people better than themselves, those people being Punk himself and Shawn Michaels. Punk says that comparison doesn’t work though because he’s better than Shawn. He’s better than Austin and Rock too. Punk says he’s the best at everything and his eyes are bugging out. Cena says Punk is right but that makes Punk a liar and a scumbag.

Cena talks about how Punk has spent a year watching PPVs go by and thinking that everyone is against him. Punk said everything on the mic and then became champion in Chicago, which made the fans believe change was coming. Then it became clear that Punk didn’t want ice cream bars or new talent or anything else. He wanted to be a star and that’s it. Cena mentions a line Punk said about becoming what he hated the most and that’s true. On the other hand there’s Punk who has no idea who he is.

Punk steals colors from Hall of Famers and stole the elbow from the late Randy Savage. CM has changed his identity over and over again over the years and right now it’s based around being champion. Cena stops to thank the fans for a bit and starts speaking French, drawing perhaps the loudest face pop he’s gotten in years. Punk yells at Cena for sucking up to the crowd and it’s time to get in each others’ faces. Cena says he’ll beat Punk up on Sunday so Punk pulls back to hit Bret, only to be stopped by Cena. Cena takes the shirt off and Punk goes for Bret again, only to get punched down and out to the floor to end the show.

Scratch that as Cole says Lawler is breathing on his own and his heart is beating on his own. He’s stabilizing and Cole gives us a recap of everything tonight. LAwler is awaiting a CAT Scan still.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a better show than last week but obviously that’s not what matters here, nor is the show on Sunday. Lawler is the important thing here and the updates coming in about him are at least somewhat positive. The last half hour of the show gets a total pass as you can’t blame the guys for their performance, nor is it important. The show built the PPV well enough, even though that’s not important right now.

Results

Kofi Kingston/R-Truth b. Antonio Cesaro/The Miz – Trouble in Paradise to Cesaro

Eve Torres/Kaitlyn/Layla b. Beth Phoenix/Natalya/Alicia Fox – Spinning neckbreaker to Fox

Randy Orton b. CM Punk via DQ when Dolph Ziggler interfered

Randy Orton/Jerry Lawler b. CM Punk/Dolph Ziggler – RKO to Ziggler

Ryback b. Heath Slater – Shell Shock

Daniel Bryan/Kane b. Prime Time Players – Bryan pinned O’Neal after a chokeslam from Kane

Alberto Del Rio b. Tyson Kidd – Cross Armbreaker

Sheamus b. David Otunga – Texas Cloverleaf

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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WCW Saturday Night
Date: September 9, 1995
Location: Center Stage Theater, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Dusty Rhodes, Bobby Heenan

This is from five days after Nitro debuted, meaning Saturday Night is still the most important show in a lot of fans’ eyes. We’re closing in on Fall Brawl and Lex Luger has just returned to shock everyone in sight. Hogan is reigning on high and feuding with the Dungeon of Doom, which was a vastly underrated stable for reasons I’ll get into at another time. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence is the same as it always was: a laboratory building a cyborg which grows flesh and becomes a wrestler.

We open with a recap from Nitro with Luger wanting a title shot at Hogan.

Vader vs. Bobby Starr/Scott D’Amore

Yes that Scott D’Amore from TNA. Vader is WAY over and starting with Starr, easily pounding him into the ropes. There’s the Vader Bomb but D’Amore makes the save for some stupid reason. The moonsault ends Scott a few seconds later. To the best of my knowledge, this is Vader’s last match before being suspended for a backstage fight with Paul Orndorff. He would be in the 1996 Royal Rumble.

Muscular Dystrophy sucks!

Cobra vs. The Grappler

Grappler is a generic masked guy and Cobra is a military themed guy. The match is a squash but we actually get a backstory to Cobra: he was in the Gulf War with Sgt. Craig Pittman but Pittman left him behind and reported Cobra AWOL, destroying Cobra’s military career. Cobra is back for revenge. Here’s the thing: yeah it’s a one note idea, but is it that much worse than stuff we hear about today in WWE? Cobra wins with a cobra clutch slam in like a minute.

Post match Cobra says Pittman will pay for breaking the code. Pittman comes in and says it was Cobra who broke the code. The match at Fall Brawl wouldn’t even last 90 seconds.

We go to the Fall Brawl control center to talk about the upcoming WarGames match with Hogan’s team (Sting/Savage/Vader) vs. the Dungeon of Doom (Kamala/Meng/Shark/Zodiac) which is as one sided of a match as you’ll ever see. Other matches include the only Flair vs. Arn Anderson PPV match that I can ever remember and a forgotten classic between Johnny B. Badd and Brian Pillman.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eddie Jackey

Eddie jumps him to start but misses a high cross body. Page hits a gutbuster and the Diamond Cutter gets the pin in maybe 35 seconds.

Post match Page says he’ll win the TV Title, which is true.

We go to the Dungeon of Doom to hear from the Dungeon of Doom about WarGames. The leader Kevin Sullivan talks to his boss the Master (played by old wrestler King Curtis Iaukea, who never appeared in an arena I don’t think) about the army of evil he’s produced to attack Hogan inside the cages. It’s like the biggest collection of 1980s monster jobbers you can ever imagine.

Zodiac/Shark/Kamala vs. Julio Sanchez/Rod Thompson/???

This “match” lasts about 30 seconds with the Dungeon destroying everyone. Zodiac (Brutus Beefcake) drives a knee into the back of Thompson’s head for the fast pin. The third jobber was never named.

We look at the rules of WarGames which aren’t important enough to list here. In short, it’s a two ring cage match and you alternate sending in one man at a time, first submission wins.

CALL THE HOTLINE!

Highlight package from Nitro.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Dick Slater

This is a co-main event tonight if you need an idea of what sort of stuff you would get here. Slater is half of the tag champions at this point. Badd has a very simple yet effective way to get the fans on his side: he throws them Frisbees and blows confetti onto them. This is a lost art in modern wrestling for some reason, but fans love nothing more than to be acknowledged by the fans. Look at people like Austin, Flair, Sting, Rock and Hogan. All of them played to the crowd and the fans loved every one of them. It’s so simple but not many people do it anymore for reasons I’ll never understand.

Slater wants to throw punches to start, which is just fine with former Golden Gloves champion Johnny B. Badd. Dick finally elbows him down and gets in some left hands as Heenan is panicking about Dusty Rhodes returning to the commentary booth in the near future. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Slater but Badd gets in a hard right hand to put Dick down.

Badd drops him again with a running knee lift but here’s Sister Sherri, who has a crush on Slater’s manager Colonel Robert Parker. Slater backslides Badd and puts his feet on the ropes but Sherri breaks it up with her crutch. Dick’s partner Bunkhouse Buck comes out for a cheap shot to Badd, but the referee is with Sherri, allowing Harlem Heat (Buck and Slater’s opponents at Fall Brawl) come out and hit Slater, giving Badd the pin.

Rating: D. There was nothing to the match itself but they managed to have four people interfere in less than four minutes. That has to be a record for a non-Russo match but it doesn’t mean it’s a good thing. I kid you not at one point the Bunk/Slater vs. Heat match was the only thing that could put me to sleep for a good while. That’s how dull these guys were.

Arn Anderson’s wife is concerned about his issues with Flair. Arn gets mad at the camera crew for talking to his wife instead of him.

We get a clip from WCW Pro (the C/D-Show) of what was supposed to be Flair vs. Brian Pillman. For some reason Flair isn’t here so we go to the back where Anderson and Flair can be heard shouting at each other in a dressing room. Apparently Flair has left, meaning Pillman wins by forfeit.

Disco Inferno is coming.

Brian Pillman vs. Barry Houston

Another squash that lasts 45 seconds with Brian winning via a tornado DDT. What else do you want me to say about something that short?

Pillman (not even breathing hard) says he’s friends with Johnny B. Badd but their match is about the US Title shot so it’s all business.

Blue Bloods vs. Sting/Randy Savage

The Blue Bloods are Steven Regal and Robert (Bobby) Eaton. For no apparent reason, Sting (the US Champion) comes out in Savage’s hat and jacket. Savage has his face painted which is a bit more normal for a Sting partner. Savage and Regal get us going with Randy grabbing a quick headlock. Regal takes him over into the corner for the tag off to Eaton, only to have Randy elbow him in the face.

Off to Sting for some arm cranking followed by a monkey flip to send Eaton over to Regal for another tag. Sting cranks on Regal’s arm just as easily but Regal goes to the eyes to take over. Sting grabs a backslide for two so Regal bails into the corner, drawing Savage in for no apparent reason. Eaton gets punched a few times but goes to the eyes as well.

Savage will have none of this being on defense though and punches both Blue Bloods in the jaw. Randy punches Regal to the floor, only to miss a dive to the concrete. Regal hooks a chinlock for all of two seconds, only to have Savage come back with a suplex to escape. The Blue Bloods take over for just a few moments but Regal backdrops out of a suplex attempt to make the tag to Sting. House is cleaned and the heels collide, setting up the Splash on Eaton followed by the elbow for the pin.

Rating: D+. There isn’t much to say when the match lasted five minutes and the good guys were on offense for about four and a half of those minutes. To be fair though, was there ever any doubt as to who was winning here? It wasn’t much of a match but it gave Savage and Sting some practice together before the PPV.

Taskmaster comes out to ask Sting and Savage if they can trust Vader. Vader comes out and says you can trust him to end the show. Not that it would matter as Vader wouldn’t make the show, because there’s nothing stupid about suspending a guy a week before a PPV match where he’s the only intriguing part right?

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a show but it definitely keeps moving and doesn’t get dull. They did a good job of keeping things interesting and even hyped up the PPV fairly well. There’s nothing needed to be seen here, but with Nitro around this show’s days of mattering were numbered anyway.

Here’s Fall Brawl if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/06/fall-brawl-1995-anderson-vs-flair-and-a-really-stupid-main-event/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 8, 2011
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s week two in Alabama and it’s also the go home show for No Surrender. That being said, we only have most of the card so far and the world title match has only been announced on Facebook instead of, you know, on the TV show which the majority of the audience actually sees. The big thing tonight is the return of Jeff Hardy on the day that he was sentenced to ten days in jail on drug charges. The return speech could be very interesting. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about Jeff Hardy and the mess that was Victory Road. He’s back tonight you know.

We also get a clip of last week where Hogan beat Sting up with a chair and cost him the world title. Anderson gets his rematch tonight.

Here’s Anderson to open the show. He talks about how he hasn’t had much to say the last few weeks because he’s been a man of action recently. He signed a deal with the devil though, and that was his own fault. Anderson welcomes the boos for it. The wide shots are really good to see here as there are actual people there instead of it looking like they’re in a lunchbox.

He turns his attention to Bully Ray for keeping him on the outside looking in. Anderson promises to be more annoying than ever before and tonight it starts with him going after Angle. Anderson brings up the dreaded rematch clause and he’s cashing in tonight. He knows it won’t be one on one and he points to the ramp. Here’s Sting to be Anderson’s backup. Sting says he’s like a fungus that won’t go away. This week he’s got the power of the Network and he’ll be the enforcer in the main event.

D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero vs. British Invasion

Winners get Mexican America on Sunday. No intro for the Brits. Magnus vs. D-Von to start. Off to Pope quickly who hammers away with elbows to the head. Williams comes in and slows things down a bit as you would expect from him. A clothesline gets two for Magnus. Mexican America are on commentatry. A middle rope elbow by Magnus gets two for Williams.

Pope fires off a DDT to Magnus and both guys are down. There’s the hot tag to D-Von who cleans house with right hands and power moves. Powerslam gets two on Williams. A Cactus Clothesline by Pope puts Williams on the floor and a release spinebuster by D-Von ends Magnus at 3:56. They seem fine despite almost always having problems.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here but it wasn’t that bad. Didn’t D-Von not particularly like Pope last week though? Also this is the best they can do for #1 contenders? They’ve won a total of one tag match (this one) and now they get a title shot. That’s wrestling for you I suppose.

An MMA fighter comes in to see Angle.

The Final Four in the BFG Series are Gunner, Roode, Storm and Ray. The matches Sunday are Roode vs. Gunner and Storm vs. Ray. The guy with the most points after those matches go to the PPV. It’s not a tournament, it’s really a points system to go to the biggest show of the year.

All four finalists are in the ring and Ray gets JB out of there. He respects Beer Money but neither of them is going to Bound For Glory. Ray talks about how tag teams want to become great individual wrestlers and every team has done it. Gunner is a guy that is willing to put his personal desires aside and will make sure Ray goes to BFG to win the title. Wrestlers are selfish so Beer Money won’t lay down for each other.

Roode says he doesn’t buy any of what Ray said but they have their eyes set on the world title. They want to be world champion and Sunday only one can walk out #1 contender. Roode asks Ray who is going to be the better man. It’s going to be Roode or Storm because it’s not going to be Gunner or Ray. Roode promises the Beer Money fans that no one will ever split them and no one will ever kill Beer Money. There’s a fatal fourway later on.

We get a recap of Eric’s Hollywood Adventures.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. Eric Young

That MMA guy is on commentary again. What he has to do with this is beyond me but who cares. Robbie keeps trying to put his feet on the ropes for covers and the referee stops counting. And there go Eric’s pants and he’s wearing Jersey Shore style trunks. He hits the top rope elbow for two. A piledriver ends this at 2:51. I’m fine with these antics if the title is defended.

Rob Terry beats up Young post match with a Last Ride.

RVD is looking for Jerry Lynn and hey there he is. Rob gets in his face and Jerry asks what about him. He complains about having to get a real job instead of getting contracts like Rob did. Eric and Hulk called him and asked him about showing up and he said he’s better than Rob. He admits to screwing him and Rob beats him down.

Velvet talks to Mickie who has a dog with her. She mentions wanting to be champion someday. Karen comes in and complains about life in general, saying get rid of the dog. Winter gets her rematch at No Surrender.

Jeff Hardy is here.

TNA World Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle

Sting is guest enforcer. They exchange headlocks to start and it’s a tossup. Angle takes Anderson down with a clothesline and we hit the chinlock. They collide in the middle of the ring and both guys are down. They’re mirroring each other so far. Anderson tries to speed it up but gets caught in a belly to belly for two. Angle Slam is countered and Anderson hits the rolling fireman’s carry drop for two.

Kurt counters the Mic Check and hits the Rolling Germans for two. There go the straps and the ankle lock goes on. Anderson manages to roll through and get two before the Mic Check gets the same. The referee takes a thumb to the eye so Kurt kicks him low and hits the Slam but Sting pulls the referee out. Anderson hits another Mic Check but here’s Gunner for the DQ at 7:12.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t into this as it felt like they were just going through the motions to get to the DQ ending. I can’t stand matches like that because they’re boring and don’t show anything that these guys are capable of. Not a good match for the most part but when you handcuff them like this there’s only so much they can do.

Immortal beats down both guys post match. The fans chant for Hardy but that gets them nowhere.

Immortal is celebrating while Eric is on the phone and doesn’t look happy. He tells them to go outside and isn’t happy with what he hears. He’s almost freaking out about it, asking if it’s a prank call. No idea what it is.

Mickie James/Velvet Sky vs. Angelina Love/Winter

Winter vs. Velvet to start but it’s off to Mickie vs. Angelina before there’s any contact at all. Mickie snaps off a rana out of the corner but a Winter distraction results in a kick to the ribs. Velvet gets a blind tag to come in and a low dropkick gets two. There’s a weak monkey flip and she takes both Winter and Angelina down with a headlock/headscissors combo. Love cheats again and Velvet gets beaten down for awhile. After a long beatdown she makes the hot tag to Mickie and we get the title match preview. With the big hulabaloo going on, Winter sprays blood into Mickie’s face at 5:10 for the pin.

Rating: D+. Love is so skinny it’s getting scary. Other than that, this was your typical Knockout tag: it’s not bad but it’s better than the Divas which is the entire point. I’m still not sure why they gave Mickie the title back already and I hope they don’t give it to Winter again on Sunday because it would be pretty stupid to have the change that fast. This wasn’t terrible though.

Here’s Austin Aries to say he’s going to win the title Sunday. He tells the fans to shut up a lot so clearly he’s not a nice person. Aries calls Kendrick a hypocrite and calls out Kendrick here and now. Here’s the champ in a suit with a briefacse. He talks about being tired of being a social outcast and wants to be a success, like Aries. “I’m even wearing shoes!” And yeah he hates them. He goes into a bit rant about how he needs to be free to reach his mother earth and quotes Buddha a bit. Kendrick calls the title materialistic and Aries insults him a lot. The brawl is on and Aries runs.

Hogan is freaking in a good way and Eric is still upset. He talks about going to the beach and Eric says we’re not done yet. The Network isn’t happy. Because of the beating that Hogan is so happy about there’s a three way for the title at No Surrender with Angle vs. Sting vs. Anderson.

James Storm vs. Robert Roode vs. Gunner vs. Bully Ray

One fall to a finish here. It’s tornado rules too. Here’s Joe almost immediately and here’s Morgan just as fast to stop him. Morgan vs. Joe on Sunday also. Ray and Storm stand tall for a bit until Ray runs Storm over. Beer Money cleans house and teases going at it until Ray breaks that up. Gunner goes for a cover and Ray isn’t happy with it. A big clothesline gets two on Roode.

Storm comes back in with a top rope cross body and beats up Gunner a bit. Roode hammers on Gunner and hits the spinebuster for two. Beer Money teases it again but instead they suplex Gunner and SHOUT THEIR NAMES. Ray runs them both over and takes them both out with power stuff. Gunner hits a running knee to Ray’s head for the pin at 5:00. That was nice as he was left in the background and then stole the pin.

Rating: C. This was ok but it was nothing great. I wish this had been the way the BFG Final went at the PPV because it would make more sense but I guess they need to flesh out the card more and have some overly complicated rules. Not bad here and Gunner winning was a nice surprise also. Nothing great but not bad.

Here’s Jeff with like two minutes left. He talks about how he was messed up last time and he’s sorry about it. He had a problem and hit rock bottom there. Everyone is mad at him and he can’t blame them. His eyes look decent at least. He wants one more shot. The fans chant one more shot. He says all he can do is ask and that’s it.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show this week but you can see a lot of problems. For one thing we got three title matches added with three days left before the PPV, one of which is the main event. That’s a match that could draw in some people and they’re adding it in at the last minute. The Hardy thing is too early to tell but my initial instinct is not to trust him, which is partially the point and all of the problem. Good show this week but No Surrender feels thrown together and that’s not good.

Results

D-Von/D’Angelo Dinero b. British Invasion – Spinebuster to Williams

Eric Young b. Robbie E – Piledriver

Mr. Anderson b. Kurt Angle via DQ when Gunner interfered

Winter/Angelina Love b. Mickie James/Velvet Sky – Winter spit blood in James’ face

Gunner b. James Storm, Robert Roode and Bully Ray – Running knee to Ray

Here’s No Surrender if you’re interested:

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Unforgiven 2008
Date: September 7, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 8,707
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Mick Foley, Jerry Lawler, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We’re at the end of the Unforgiven series here and the most important thing is that we have a pretty unique concept to it tonight. This time, it’s based around Championship Scrambles for the world titles. The idea is you have 5 people and a 20 minute time limit. Whoever gets the last pinfall (I’m not sure if you have to pin the champion) before the time is up wins the match and the championship. There are three of them. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about the Scramble but then shifts over into Jericho vs. Shawn which is based on Jericho accidentally hitting Shawn’s wife in the face and setting up an unsanctioned match with them tonight.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry vs. Finlay vs. The Miz vs. Chavo Guerrero

The guys come in on a random draw with Hardy vs. The Miz. Man who would have thought Miz and Henry would be the biggest stars out of this group? Miz is just a chick magnet here. You don’t have to pin the current champion (Mark Henry) to become the interim champion (best word I can think of for it). These two will fight for five minutes until someone else comes in.

Miz and Matt exchange some pinfall attempts even though they don’t really mean much at this point. The corner clothesline misses for the Chick Magnet and Matt gets a cool move in as Miz is caught in the corner and Matt pulls him out by his legs into a sitout powerbomb. It’s kind of hard to describe but basically Matt pulled him out of the air into the powerbomb. We get a history of Cameron, North Carolina which has like 600 people in it to fill time since nothing in the first 19:00 is going to mean anything.

According to Striker this is the brainchild of Pat Patterson. He also came up with the Royal Rumble so maybe this will be good. Miz hits the Reality Check but Matt falls to the floor. Eventually that gets two as Chavo is the third guy in. Ok so now it’s a triple threat for five minutes. Chavo hits a Frog Splash on Matt for the pin to become the Interim Champion very quickly. I don’t think he has to get pinned to change it but I’m not sure. Yeah it can be anyone pinning anyone so it’s like a triple threat.

Chavo busts out a rolling Liger kick of all things and then a suicide dive to further kill Miz. Everyone goes to one corner but Miz shoves them both off. He busts out a cross body to take out both guys, getting two on Hardy. Matt takes over and pops Miz with a right hand and a Side Effect to Chavo gives Matt the Interim Title. The fans are way behind Matt here and they should be.

Everyone slows down as Mark Henry comes in at #4. Everyone goes after Mark when the right answer would be to run from him. If he can’t catch you, he can’t pin you. Henry takes them all down with ease, not selling anyone like a good monster. The Slam gets the pin on Chavo to make him Interim Champion. Hardy escapes the Slam but gets knocked to the floor quickly.

Again, why does everyone go after Henry? We’ve established that you can pin anyone but wrestlers are stupid above all other things. Henry takes turns giving people bearhugs to people and finally settles on Hardy. Here’s Finlay to complete the group with five minutes to go. Finlay goes straight for Henry and actually pounds him down, getting a DDT for two. Horny slides Finlay the club and Henry is thrown to the floor after a shot with it. A Celtic Cross to Hardy makes Finlay Interim champion at 3:45 to go.

Miz comes in and takes out Finlay with a missile dropkick but walks into a Twist of Fate and Matt is champion at 3:15 to go. Henry and everyone else is back in now and Hardy starts playing defense, breaking up every possible cover. Two minutes left. Henry slams everyone in sight other than Hardy and Miz rolls up Finlay for two. Miz is cut a little bit on the forehead.

Finlay tries the Celtic Cross on Hardy but Henry breaks it up. The Slam gets two on Miz as Hardy saves again. Thirty seconds left and Hardy starts throwing people to the floor in some GREAT psychology. Everyone winds up in a pile in the corner and time runs out, making Matt the official champion.

Rating: B. Fun match here as the ending few minutes after Hardy got the Interim Title were great with him THINKING through the whole thing, knowing that he had to keep anyone from pinning anyone and finding ways to prevent that from happening. This was really fun and Matt would hold the title for awhile until Jack Swagger debuted and eventually took it from him, prompting Matt’s ill-advised heel turn.

The Hardys celebrate in the back after a video for Mania tickets.

HHH and Punk are warming up. They’re the champions coming in.

Should Big Show have been in the title match? Run up your cell phone bill and let us know!

Raw Tag Titles: Cryme Tyme vs. Legacy

If nothing else we get the Priceless theme here which is always a treat. JTG vs. Rhodes to start us off. The racial stereotypes take over and clear the ring quickly with a double clothesline from Shad sending the champions to the floor. Shad vs. DiBiase takes up some time and Ted does about as well as Cody did. The challengers hit a nice double team move ending in a slingshot clothesline by Jimmy the Gimmick.

Legacy finally realizes that JTG is beating them up and takes over with double teaming. They work on JTG’s arm and show how much they’ve grown in the past few years as they’re not much here. Jerry gets on Cole for talking too much as JTG fights back, hitting a belly to back suplex. Cody prevents the tag and Legacy cheats like proper heels. I get a little smile on my face every time JTG gets punched. I can’t help it after watching over 35 weeks of him on NXT.

Cody works on the arm a little more and then slams JTG near the corner. A moonsault (decent one too) misses and it’s hot tag to Shad. Remember when JTG vs. Shad was supposed to be a big feud? Neither do I but some people actually believe it would be. Shad cleans house and I can see why people thought he’d be a good bodyguard style character. The guy has a good look and can do some power stuff.

Not that it really matters here as Cody grabs a DDT on him to slow him down. It only gets two but the momentum was stopped dead. Cody comes in legally now and gets his head taken off via a lariat. In a not great ending, JTG rolls up Rhodes as Shad hits DiBiase. DiBiase stumbles into the package and rolls it over so that JTG gets pinned. Why didn’t he just let go?

Rating: C-. Not as bad as most Raw matches but still it’s nothing all that great. They tried and Cryme Tyme was over, but Legacy at this point wasn’t a threat of any kind. Neither had a finisher that I remember and they came off as rookies with zero personality (intentionally I think) and didn’t do anything until a few years later when they split from Orton, which took years to get to.

There’s a post match brawl until Manu debuts to help Legacy. He joined them for like a month and no one cared.

Shawn is having his bad arm taped up for his match with Jericho. Shawn is in fighting clothes and has a partial tear in his elbow tendon.

We recap Jericho vs. Shawn. The feud had been going for awhile before this but at Summerslam, Shawn had said that he was listening to his doctors for once and was walking away due to his eye and various other injuries. Jericho said he didn’t accept that because Shawn was doing it in the spotlight, unlike how he should do it by resigning quietly.

Jericho wanted Shawn to admit that it was Jericho that retired him but Shawn said no, but to tell your family that you’ll never be Shawn Michaels. With that, Jericho went for the eye but Shawn ducked and Jericho punched Shawn’s wife. Jericho, the consummate heel, said that it was Shawn’s fault. Shawn vows revenge and it’s an unsanctioned match tonight. This easily won feud of the year and the match at No Mercy won match of the year. This is no slouch though.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

This is unsanctioned and it’s pin or submission only. In essence, it’s no holds barred. Cole says Shawn told him of a Bible verse which talks about the Walls of Jericho coming down. That’s a great line. Why is there a WWE referee in an unsanctioned match? Couldn’t anyone referee it/not need a referee? Shawn takes his cowboy boot off to whack Jericho with it as he’s going after the eye just like Chris did to him.

They’re into the crowd already and it’s been all Shawn. The injury is to the triceps, not the elbow. Jericho is bleeding from the nose so Shawn hits a slingshot into the post. Shawn’s chair shot misses and Chris sends him into the table (doesn’t break it) to take over. Now we get a breakable table set up but instead Jericho just throws it at Shawn to keep him down. Chris tries to powerbomb him through the table but Shawn fires off punches. Jericho just drops him face first onto the apron instead to keep the advantage. That looked painful.

Back inside now and Jericho works Shawn over with a chair. Jericho wedges said chair in the corner but misses a charge into the opposite corner, ramming into the post. Jericho can’t suplex Shawn over the top through the table as Shawn lands on the apron. Back in Shawn nips up and just chokes Jericho down. The elbow hits and Shawn is all fired up. Sorry for the play by play but this is one of those matches where you almost have to have all of the individual details for the other stuff to make sense.

Shawn sets for Chin Music but stops to punch Jericho more. Off to a Crossface but Jericho manages to send his head into the chair, reinjuring the eye. Jericho peppers the eye so Shawn fires off right hands. Shawn tries a piledriver but gets reversed into the Walls instead. Shawn gets to a rope but THANKFULLY the referee doesn’t break it. Instead HBK finds a fire extinguisher from somewhere to spray in Chris’ eyes to break the hold.

They go to the floor and Jericho goes into the barricade as it’s all Shawn here. There’s a suplex on the ramp and both guys are down. Here’s Lance Cade and Shawn beats him up too. Cade gets in a shot to the arm though and Jericho wraps the arm around the post for good measure. Jericho hits the arm with a chair as Shawn is in real trouble. They set to Pillmanize the arm but Shawn kicks Cade into the ropes to crotch Jericho. Chin Music puts Cade down and clocks Jericho with the chair, sending him to the floor through the table.

Shawn works over Jericho with the chair now and loads up the announcers’ table as per wrestling law. Cade is laid out on the table while Jericho is on the floor. Shawn sets to go up top but instead coems down and puts Jericho on top of Cade on the table. Here’s your HUGE spot of the match as Shawn drops an elbow onto the back of Jericho and pops up somehow. That was awesome!

Back in the ring Shawn whips Jericho with the belt and won’t let up. He pulls Jericho’s arm around his own neck (Jericho’s arm is around Jericho’s neck) and pounds away at the eye as the referee is begging him to have mercy. Shawn just doesn’t care and goes back after the eye until in an unsanctioned match, the referee stops it, drawing a very mixed reaction from the crowd.

Rating: A-. This is one of those matches where blood would have really improved things. Having Shawn in a white shirt and having him covered in Jericho’s blood to end it and looking down at himself and not caring how far he let it go would have been a great ending. That being said, it’s still a great revenge match as Jericho did everything imaginable to make the fans hate him and it worked. Good stuff here, although the lack of a clearer finish hurt it.

Shawn goes after Jericho again post match and superkicks the referee when he tries to stop him. The fans are very pleased.

Legacy (Manu included) is in the back when Orton comes in. Rhodes introduces Orton to (named) Manu and Manu praises the champs. Orton says it was luck instead of skill. Orton says talent is forever but luck can run out, so no he’s not impressed.

Smackdown World Title: Triple H vs. Jeff Hardy vs. The Brian Kendrick vs. MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin

Same rules as earlier and Jeff starts with Shelton who is currently a boring heel and US Champion. Shelton says he’s the Gold Standard. Yep, that’s really the best they could come up with him. Hardy grabs a rollup to start and they’re moving out there. They kind of botch something as you could tell Shelton was supposed to do something but Hardy moved. He immediately grabs a headlock and you can hear him talking to Jeff. Snap suplex gets two for Shelton.

JR talks about the Grand Slam Title and Hardy looking to become the 7th Grand Slam winner ever. Hardy takes him to the mat and gets a bunch of nearfalls. There’s the countdown and Kendrick (with Big Zeke Jackson) is in third. He was channeling some serious Brian Pillman around this time too. Zeke doesn’t come with him here for some reason. Kendrick chills outside and Shelton tries to hook a German on Hardy off the apron. Kendrick knocks Shelton to the floor, possibly by mistake, and then goes after Hardy.

A forearm gets two on Hardy and Kendrick is all lit up. Jeff grabs a faceplant on Kendrick out of nowhere and becomes Interim Champion in a POP. Back to Shelton now who Hardy covers, probably out of instinct. Shelton misses a Stinger Splash so Jeff rolls him up again. Twist of Fate is countered into Shelton’s Paydirt finisher for two. Kendrick hits Sliced Bread and is Interim Champion.

Up fourth is MVP and I have no idea if he’s a face or a heel. The fans cheer for him so we’ll say face. He throws out the white guys and beats on Shelton. MVP loads up the Drive By on Shelton but Kendrick comes out of nowhere with a SICK leg lariat to a huge reaction. Jeff is back in now and hits the slingshot dropkick on MVP and Shelton at the same time. Shelton finally takes Kendrick down with a Samoan Drop.

Everyone knocks each other down as we’re waiting for HHH to come in and dominate everything in sight. Kendrick counters a Shelton powerbomb into a nice rana. Here’s HHH and Kendrick has been Interim Champion for five minutes plus now. Facebuster for MVP and a spinebuster for Kendrick sets up a Pedigree to make HHH Interim Champion 48 seconds after his music hit.

We’re under four minutes now as Shelton takes a beating from HHH on the floor. MVP and Hardy are in the ring now and a Twist of Fate makes Hardy the Interim Champion (POP) with about 3 minutes left. Sliced Bread is kind of countered so Hardy hits a sitout gordbuster and goes up for the Swanton. HHH makes the save and Pedigrees Kendrick again to get the title at 2:00. Jeff Swantons Kendrick immediately and is champion with 1:45 to go.

Pedigree is countered and we’re under 90 seconds. Hardy dives on HHH and the other three do a Tower of Doom spot to put everyone down at 40 seconds left. Whisper in the Wind to MVP and a Swanton to Shelton. HHH runs back in for a Pedigree on MVP and Hardy shows his idiocy by not breaking it up as HHH wins the belt back with 1 second left. Hardy’s time was coming.

Rating: B-. Nowhere near as good of a match as this was about Hardy and HHH having another contest. HHH did his thing and is somehow a 13 time champion or whatever. Not as good as the first one because we all knew it would be Hardy or HHH at the end of the day. Kendrick was shockingly champion for the longest amount of time while MVP never was anything more than a bonus. The ending was stupid too with not breaking up that cover which he saw.

Shawn says he’s not happy with what happened and he’ll be back for more. He’s content but there’s no closure. He wants to hurt Jericho like that every night and the worst is yet to come for Jericho.

Punk is in the back when Orton comes up. He calls Punk a fluke and Punk runs him down, saying he’s always hurt and all that stuff. Punk says he’s busy at the moment when Legacy attacks. Kofi tries to come in for the save but is beaten down also. Punk gets Punted and is out cold. This wouldn’t be paid off for over two years but they FINALLY got to it eventually.

Divas Title: Maryse vs. Michelle McCool

Michelle is champion. Michelle as a face just never worked. She’s such a natural villain and her pumping her fist doesn’t work at all. She hurts her knee going to the floor and Maryse works on it as we’re waiting for the people to get back from popcorn time to end this. Michelle works on Maryse’s leg in a heel hook but she gets a rope. The fans are all over this match already. A sitout gordbuster keeps the title on McCool.

Rating: D-. Michelle and Maryse are too hot to be a failure but the match was terrible. NO ONE cared and that was very clear. Nothing to see here and we’re moving on. Why this got almost six minutes was crazy but I’d assume that it was due to a long line at the Cena shirt booths. Horrible match.

Mike Adamle, the GM of Raw, says Punk is out of the title match and that he’ll find someone else.

Here’s Big Show to chat for a bit. He offers his services to replace Punk in the title match. Show says go vote and makes a bunch of election references for some reason. He asks the fans if they’ll vote for him and goes to leave but the still fat Vickie waddles out. She blasts him for no apparent reason and this is going nowhere. She throws him out and that causes…druids?

Show is laughing as a casket is brought out. This takes FOREVER until Taker pops up on the screen. He says he’s coming for her like he promised and she’ll burn and all that jazz. Show holds Vickie there and this takes forever. Taker grabs Vickie by the throat and Show turns heel, knocking Taker out. The beating goes on for awhile because we have 15 people in three matches so there’s almost no midcard to speak of.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Orton was on Raw and called out Punk for disgracing the title. Orton was injured at this point and Punk called him an afterthought. That set up the punt earlier.

Regal is talking to Adamle and says he should be in the Scramble. Adamle says he’s on the list but Punk might be able to go.

Raw World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Batista vs. Kane vs. Rey Mysterio vs. ???

Batista vs. JBL gets us going in the main event here. Batista takes over quickly with power (duh) but JBL hooks a sleeper. Big Dave breaks that quickly and throws on a pretty freaking good Figure Four. It’s better than most HHH ever used. JBL no sells the knee work and beats on Batista outside. Kane comes in third and that wasn’t five minutes. That might not have been four minutes.

He’s a heel here if you’re not all that up to date on your Kane face/heel alignment. He hits his low dropkick and I guess if no one gets a pin here, Punk is still champion? JBL is still down so it’s one on one here. Side slam puts Batista down and Kane misses the clothesline off the top. Batista misses a spear but breaks out of the chokeslam. JBL pops back in and walks into a chokeslam to make Kane Interim Champion. Rey, complete with mowhawk, is in fourth and that wasn’t five minutes either.

Rey knocks Kane to the floor but JBL comes back and pops him in the face with a punch. He speeds things up but Kane ducks a 619 and takes Rey’s stupid looking mowhawked head off with a clothesline. Batista and Rey team up to beat up Kane and then Mysterio tries to steal a pin on Batista. JBL beats up various people as the fifth man is….Chris Jericho. You know, because no one is better suited than the guy that is walking slower than an 80 year old woman.

Jericho gets in after 50 seconds of walking down the aisle, only to have Batista spear him down. Now that just wasn’t nice. Four minutes left and Batista takes everyone down. He manages a big boot to Kane and gets two as Rey saves. Under three minutes. 619 to JBL and Batista DESTROYS Rey as he’s trying a springboard move. Rey just collapsed and it looked awesome. Two minutes left and everyone is down. Kane gets up and the clothesline gets two on Big Dave with 75 seconds left. Batista spears Kane down with 53 to go and a spinebuster makes Batista Interim Champion at 35 seconds. Rey goes after Batista and Jericho steals a pin on Kane with 4 seconds left to win the title.

Rating: D+. The problem was that once Jericho came in, everyone knew he was going to win. He was by far and away the hottest thing in the company at this point though so you can’t really argue putting the belt on him. Not a good match in the slightest but Jericho winning was a great surprise and gave Shawn vs. Jericho a new dynamic and a reason to continue, which was a good thing.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty decent show overall and definitely something different, but the Scrambles get old after the second one. The LONG Taker vs. Show segment is annoying because that feud was played 5 years before this show. Shawn vs. Jericho is a great brawl and the ECW match is good, but the rest is pretty weak stuff, especially since the lowest of the Scrambles was the best.

Well I’m done with Unforgiven now and there’s not much to say here. It’s just another B level show that had some good years and some bad but it’s never something worth much. It’s the Backlash of Summerslam and while that’s fine, it doesn’t make for a ton of interesting matches and stories because everything significant was done the month before. Next up will be the Great American Bash.

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Clash of the Champions 12: Fall Brawl 90
Date: September 5, 1990
Location: Ashville Civic Center, Ashville, North Carolina
Commentators: Bob Caudle, Jim Ross
Attendance: 4,000

We’re kind of in No Man’s Land here with no major show to build to and none to come off of. This is in the Black Scorpion period so you know things are pretty bad. That’s the main event tonight: Sting vs. the Black Scorpion in what I’m sure will be a classic. Other than that you get a Nasty Boys match of all things. Yes the Nasty Boys in 1990. That should be shall we say, interesting? Outside of that….yeah this is going to suck. Let’s get to it.

Side note: this show winds up having a special moment for me which we’ll get to at the end.

Also keep in mind this has zero connection to the PPV series of the same name. This show is also called Mountain Madness.

Jim and Bob run down the card.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

Garvin and Hayes here. We get the music video as it feels like the 80s all over again. You old school fans know what I’m talking about. The Freebirds are faces here which makes me think we might have faces vs. faces here. The Freebirds are the Southern tag champions here which I’m not sure what are. Yep faces vs. faces. This was supposed to be a six man with Bob Armstrong and Buddy Roberts on the respective teams but Roberts has a bad arm so it’s standard.

Hayes and Smothers start us off. The Birds have face paint on which is a different thing for them. Also the ramp is really weird here as it comes to a corner rather than the traditional side of the ring. Ok maybe the Birds are heels but the crowd just likes them. That sounds far more realistic in the South. Smothers hits a nice superkick to send Garvin to the floor. And now the fans think the Birds suck. Maybe it’s just that the crowd is insane.

Armstrong (the Southern Boys are Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers in case the names were confusing you. The Freebirds are Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin) hits a SWEET top rope cross body and the Birds go running. Or is it flying? Everything goes nuts so we kind of restart things with Smothers vs. Hayes again. BIG left hand by Hayes catches Armstrong as he’s on the apron.

I’ve looked around and I have no idea what those tag titles the Birds allegedly hold are. Now the Birds are being booed. Caudle thinks if Robert E. Lee had the Southern Boys during the Civil War Atlanta might have been the capital. They really would have been awesome if they had gotten the Confederacy to switch from Richmond to Atlanta for the capital. Yeah I’m that bored here: I’m making US History corrections.

The Freebirds are credited as being the first team to use rock and roll music for their entrances. Ross mentions that here and for once that’s accurate. Listen to some DVDs and see how many people take credit for being the first to do that. Gorgeous George used theme music back in the 50s but I’m pretty sure the Birds were the first to use rock music. Then again almost everyone in WCCW did that at first so it was either them or the Von Erichs. Again, not much is going on here so I have time for tangents like these. I need to do some WCCW stuff.

Armstrong comes in to clean some house and has a nice dropkick. Bob Armstrong comes in to cheat to counteract Roberts’ cheating. Yep his arm is fine of course. Everything goes nuts and Roberts throws a foreign object to Hayes but a double sunset flip gets the pin for the Southern Boys. The heels beat up Bob Armstrong (Road Dogg’s dad. Steve is his brother) after the match.

Rating: C-. Not a great match at all as it was very start and stop which is rarely a good thing. This wasn’t horrible and the fast paced stuff made it fairly good. Far too many dead spots in there though. Also the double Southern gimmick was just kind of a headscratcher. Crowd is red hot though so this was a good opener from that perspective.

Tony talks to the Steiners who just won the US Tag Titles. Rick in a pink hat works somehow. Scott fumbles through both of his lines. They’re fighting Maximum Overdrive tonight. No one has heard of them, which is probably because they’re a pair of jobbers.

Buddy Landel vs. Mike Rotunda

Rotunda would be gone to become IRS in like a day. Landel is still alive here which amazes me. Rotunda has some chick with him that won a poetry contest held by Burger King. Very different time obviously. Technical stuff to start with nothing really all that special about it thus far. Somewhat botched hip toss by Rotunda and we have a standoff.

Rotunda’s tights have an anchor on them for some reason. A second hip toss works a bit better this time as Landel actually jumps. We somehow slow it down even more here which I didn’t think was possible. They slug it out a bit which is definitely the best part of this so far. But enough of that as we hit the mat again. Rotunda gets up and hooks a freaking backslide to get the pin. Wow that’s not something you see everyday.

Rating: D. Just boring filler here as neither guy meant anything at all. Rotunda turned heel soon after this but was in WWF less than 6 months later. This went nowhere at all and was just about five minutes of wrestling to fill in that much time. Landel was pretty worthless here and was gone soon also.

The Freebirds say they’re awesome and are rather ticked off about life in general. Oh apparently they want the Southern Boys again. We get a video of them in Hollywood as they were supposed to be a big time rock band. Fans mob them and that’s that.

Tim Horner/Brad Armstrong vs. Master Blasters

Brad Armstrong is a very underrated wrestler that oddly enough would hook up with the Freebirds as a masked man soon after this. The Master Blasters are a debuting team of giants, one of which has a huge mowhawk which he would soon shave and replace with black hair. When this team died off he would be repackaged as Vinnie Vegas but then he would get released to go to WWF and become a guy named Diesel, who would eventually become known by his real name: Kevin Nash.

It’s weird seeing Nash look all ripped. Armstrong is called the Candy Man here. Any guesses as to what we’re going to see here? Nash, a power guy named Steel, uses a wristlock. Iron, the dude that did nothing other than be a part of this team, is really bad. You can tell Nash is really green here. Iron misses a falling headbutt so badly the fans loudly boo it. When you can see it that clearly without a video screen that’s a bad sign.

Nash hits a decent powerslam on Armstrong to take him down. His eyes are FREAKY as they’re wide open and very white. Nash works the majority of the match as he’s the one that sucks less here. This Iron guy is horrible. He falls down before a dropkick hits him and can’t take a backdrop properly. Horner comes in and gets about 20 seconds of offense in before Nash crushes him. Double shoulderblock ends Armstrong clean.

Rating: D. Just a squash but Iron was HORRIBLE. Nash wasn’t very good yet but he was passable at least. Horner was a jobber for the most part but was decent enough. Armstrong was a good worker but he was a jobber here so you couldn’t see much of that. This was fine for what it was but nothing special at all.

Brian Pillman is going to start a new contest called the gauntlet. Back in the day there was an NWA show on Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. You would have a match on each show and if you won all three you won $15,000. If you lost the three guys split the money. Kind of a pointless concept but it lasted for awhile. Nothing special though.

Missy Hyatt brings out the “greatest world champion of ever”, Ric Flair. He has a US Title match vs. Luger tonight and is rather over since this is definitely Flair country. Nothing is said here at all.

Jackie Fulton/Terry Taylor vs. Nasty Boys

Fulton is the brother of Bobby Fulton of the Fantastics and did some stuff in Japan. This ends his career highlights. Everyone else I’d think you know. Knobbs and Fulton start us off. This is the debut for the Nasties and of course they would be gone in a few months. Knobbs was in the final three of the 91 Rumble so the couldn’t have been in WCW long after this.

Fulton takes them both down very quickly as the Nasties can’t get much going. Caudle tries to say that Jackie is one of the Fantastics which is incorrect but whatever. Taylor sends Sags into the post as the first time team is winning here surprisingly enough. You would think the Nasties were the jobbers here. Taylor is the key to the match here. Why he’s the key is never explained but apparently he’s the key.

The Nasties take over with the highest extent of their wrestling abilities. Taylor gets a sunset flip for two as Knobbs punches the mat by mistake. Heel miscommunication lets Fulton get the tag. He goes up but Knobbs catches him in a nice powerslam, allowing Sags to hit a top rope elbow to end it.

Rating: C. I can’t believe I’m saying this but the Nasty Boys had an entertaining match. This was kind of an odd debut here but the Nasties looked good near the end. Hardly a great match but I thought it was entertaining enough for about 7 minutes. Power vs. speed is hard to screw up even for the Nasty Boys.

Sid Vicious is here and wants to yell at Sting. Sid was a Horsemen here and wants the title, which are grounds for throwing him out. Just ask Sting if nothing else.

Bill Irwin vs. Tommy Rich

Irwin was the Goon in WWF and something close to a big star in WCCW but is a generic cowboy here. Tommy Rich is the most forgotten world champion ever and we start off fast. Rich hits a dropkick to send Irwin to the floor which Ross ensures us is NOT a DQ because his feet hit the mat first. That makes such little sense I’m not even going to try to make a joke out of it so whatever. We talk about the military for no apparent reason other than Rich is wearing a Confederate style of tights.

Rich hits a jumping headlock takeover which looked like he wanted Irwin to carry him over the threshold or something. Lot of headlocks here. Irwin stomps the same way Lance Storm does with that little hop in his kicks. Rich gets a pretty nice counter to a side slam into a sleeper. Charge misses for Irwin and a Thesz Press gets the pin. As surprising as this may be that is supposed to be a pinning combination. I’m not sure how one move can be a combination but you get the point.

Rating: D+. Far too short to mean much and the headlocks were rather repetitive but they were working rather quickly out there. Rich would join the York Foundation in a rather pointless stable but it had some success. Other than that neither guy meant anything until Rich went to ECW and did some forgettable stuff.

We get the WCW Top Ten.

World Champion: Sting

10. Buddy Landel
9. Tommy Rich
8. Junkyard Dog
7. Flyin Brian
6. Stan Hansen
5. Sid Vicious
4. Barry Windham
3. Arn Anderson
2. Ric Flair
1. Lex Luger

Tag Teams:

World Champions: Doom

10. Rotundo/Horner
9. Junkyard Dog/El Gigante
8. Flyin Bryan/Z-Man
7. Samoan Swat Team
6. Freebirds
5. Southern Boys
4. Midnight Express
3. Horsemen (no members listed)
2. Rock N Roll Express
1. Steiner Brothers

Took a minute to list off and that’s all there is to it. I never got the point of these things.

Stan Hansen is mad that he’s number 6 so he’s going to fight everyone above him.

LPWA World Title: Bambi vs. Susan Sexton

So back in the 80s and early 90s there were a fair amount of women’s wrestling companies. None of them were very good and they had a lot of the same rosters. This is another example of one where they try to get their product on national TV. Susan is champion here but it doesn’t really matter all that much as this won’t be mentioned again. Both are in the old school one piece swimsuit-looking outfits.

Sexton works on the knee early as she’s fairly decent from a technical standpoint. This is all technical stuff which isn’t that interesting but is pretty decent from the standpoint of technique. Sexton does the first move that isn’t technical with a reverse cross body. Boring match so far. Small package by Bambi gets two and is reversed for the pin by Sexton.

Rating: D. Yeah this was pretty pointless. The problem with these companies was that there was absolutely nothing separating these girls once they got in the ring. Today you have companies like SHIMMER where the girls are all distinctly different. These girls had different names and gimmicks but inside the ring they were the same thing, making the company pointless. Pretty worthless match but not terrible.

Maximum Overdrive vs. Steiner Brothers

Overdrive is an unknown team and the Steiners just won the US Tag Titles and are more or less considered the only team in the world capable of touching Doom at this point. What do you think is going to happen here? Scott and one of the jobbers start us off. Scott gets a Sharpshooter without the legs being intertwined. The jobbers names are Hunter and Silencer.

There’s a reason I’ve never heard of them. In the words of Steve Austin, it’s because they absolutely suck. Surprisingly enough Rick seems to be the more popular one here. I know I’m not saying much here but this is just killing time before we get to the end. And there it is as Scott ENDS Hunter with the DDT from the top.

Rating: D-. Again I say so? No one thought there was any kind of chance for the no names here and that’s exactly what the case was. Why should anyone have wanted to see a six minute squash, especially when the other team was awful? They were a jobbing tag team and this was their career highlight. Can we go to something else now?

Missy plugs the Main Event and I want to hit her.

Stan Hansen vs. Z-Man

Hmm what do you think is going to happen here? Z-Man wears pink in this, apparently just wanting Hansen to murder him faster. We’re already on the floor and Hansen pops him with a chair. Hansen is kind of a cross between Austin and JBL when he was a bar fighter. He had a match at a WWF/Japanese (might have been AJPW but I’m not sure) with Hogan and he nearly KILLED Fink. In case you didn’t guess Z-Man has gotten a total of one kick in throughout the match here. He gets some jobber offense in the form of dropkicks until a Lariat ends him.

Rating: N/A. Just to show that Hansen is awesome and giving him a reason to be in the building. Keep that in mind.

We recap Luger vs. Flair at Wrestlewar 90 where Luger STILL couldn’t get the title off of him. He’s been US Champion for over a year now so everyone is just waiting on him to lose it. Luger is second only to Sting in popularity but Flair is his Kryptonite. Luger says he’s not used to being the champion vs. Flair which is true as I don’t think Flair has ever challenged him for anything before.

US Title: Ric Flair vs. Lex Luger

I love that black and white Flair robe. It has to be his best one, including the blue one. Since we’re in North Carolina, Flair is more or less the second coming. There’s no feeling out period here since both of them have fought about a million times. Speaking of a million times, Flair broke his back in a plane crash 20 years ago. Flair chops Luger and Luger Hulks Up.

Luger’s offense is limited at best but the fans freaking love him so it’s easy to see why he was pushed the way he was. Flair’s shoulder might be hurt. To the shock of no one that pays attention he’s faking and a cheap shot gives him the advantage. Ross messes up when he talks about Flair’s past, saying he played football and weighed 265lbs, 25lbs lighter than he is now, putting Luger at 290 here.

Basically Flair wants this to get his shot at Sting again. And there goes the knee as Flair gets a solid shot in on it. Flair chops away in the corner then kicks Luger in the knee and repeats the sequence a few times. Nice. Luger comes back again and we get a Flair Flop, but as he goes down Flair pokes him in the eye. That is what you call thinking while wrestling. We hit the fifteen minute mark (more like 10) and Luger gets two on a backslide. We already had one fall off of that move this century so there was no way that was happening.

Flair goes flying off the top as the crowd is way into this. We get the corner flip and clothesline on the apron as Flair is reeling. Another gorilla press and powerslam set up the Rack. It’s a bearhug first which makes sense for once here. Second rope suplex gets two as Flair gets his foot on the ropes. You can hear the crowd groan as they thought it was over. Flair hits a cross body to send them both to the floor. Luger gets back in and gets MAULED by Stan Hansen. This set up their match at Halloween Havoc where Hansen ended the longest US Title reign ever. Luger would get it back about 7 weeks later and hot it seven more months, giving him the title for two years minus 50 days. That’s not bad.

Rating: B. Rather good match here as these two just have insanely good chemistry together. Other than Sting Flair brought out the best in Luger and this was no exception. It’s a natural face vs. a natural heel which is the easiest formula in the world to work and these two did it as well as anyone. Luger chased Flair for years and I don’t think ever beat him for a title.

The Black Scorpion wants Sting. If Sting wins he’ll tell Sting who he is. Sting says he’s ready.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Black Scorpion

Scorpion has to be very careful here because he can’t let any of his trademark moves come out here so as to preserve his identity. Sting is so popular it’s unreal. This is actually the NWA and WCW Titles at once but they’re the same thing so it doesn’t really matter. Scorpion is in a hood and a mask so he’s doubling up here. Scorpion beats up Sting to start here but something tells me that’s not going to last long.

The announcers try to figure out who is under the mask as it’s been established that Scorpion is someone from Sting’s past. We hit the floor and it’s more or less even. Back in the ring and Sting takes over. He goes for the mask but the Scorpion gets out. There’s a section of about 20 empty chairs about seven to nine rows deep. Those would be excellent seats as they’re about eye level with the ring. I don’t remember them being empty earlier so they must have left or something.

They brawl on the ramp for a bit and Sting takes over. Top rope cross body gets two and Scorpion keeps the advantage. We take a shot at WWF by saying anyone can have a belt made and say they’re a champion but only this title dates back to 1905. That’s nonsense but since when has truth meant anything in wrestling? In something I hardly ever remember, Sting gets the pin off the Splash and not the Deathlock.

Rating: D+. Pretty much a standard match here which obviously was to further the angle which was blown off as Starrcade where the Scorpion was revealed to be of course Ric Flair. This Scorpion was a former midcarder named Al Perez whose name shouldn’t really mean anything to you. The match was more or less just a power vs. power match and I don’t think anyone believed Sting was in anything resembling danger.

Post match Sting goes for the mask and gets it off, revealing a red mask underneath. He goes for that one but ANOTHER Black Scorpion shows up on the ramp. Instead of, oh I don’t know, RUNNING EIGHT FEET TO GET AT THE BLACK SCORPION, Sting stares at him and lets him walk away.

Sting says he’s confused to end the show.

On a semi-related note, the Black Scorpion standing on the ramp and staring down Sting is my very first memory of wrestling ever.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty weak show but the Luger vs. Flair match is good and the main event has the most popular guy in the world not named Hulk Hogan so it revived the crowd. The problem is this is a two hour show and about an hour of it is just painfully boring. WCW was in a weird spot here as there wasn’t really much of anything for Sting to do and with Flair leaving in about 9 months things would just get worse. It would take a combination of Rick Rude and Paul E. Dangerously (Heyman) to breathe life into the company in about 13 months. This wasn’t much at all but the last half hour was ok. Not worth seeing though.

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Monday Nitro #1
Date: September 4, 1995
Location: Mall of America, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Steve McMichael, Bobby Heenan

So nearly three years after Raw got going, WCW woke up and realized that being on Saturday nights at 6:05 for your flagship show was freaking STUPID so they decided to go head to head with Raw by debuting Monday Nitro. Their first episode aired when Raw wasn’t on that week which really was the right thing to do when you think about it.

It’s just one hour tonight for no apparent reason, but they manage to pack a good bit in here, including a very important thing that I’ll get to later on. This is a show I’ve seen at least 5 or 6 times so I remember it being not bad. Let’s see how it was.

I always liked the intro video for Nitro as it was a street more or less blowing up with pictures of wrestlers and a great song. It really was cool and I liked it better than Raw’s for a long time. I don’t think anyone knew who McMichael was outside of Chicago, but when did that really bother WCW?

Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Brian Pillman

I can’t wait to do SuperBrawl 2 as their match there could rival Bret vs. Owen for beat PPV opener ever. Liger is just coming back from a broken leg so he might be a bit rusty, meaning he’ll be better than 95% of the wrestlers in the world. Naturally, they start off hot. This is another one of those pairings where it’s hard to mess it up. We’re two minutes in and Mongo and Heenan are already calling each other names.

This could be a really long night. Eric is pitching the company like no other which is fine here as it might be the first show for a lot of viewers. We get the surfboard which is a move that I always mark for. Bobby has a great line: “I never go surfing. I always have people do it for me.” I love that. McMichael is trying but he’s just lost out there. For the life of me I have no idea why they thought he was a good idea.

Liger gets a hurricanrana from the top rope which was a move that no one had seen for the most part. And no, the Frankensteiner doesn’t count as it’s nowhere near as fast or as crisp. These two were WAY ahead of their time out here as the Cruiserweights wouldn’t rise to prominence for over a year. Out of nowhere, Pillman hooks a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B. This is based on being the first match in the new era of the company. They set the pace for the show as they had a fast paced and exciting match. What else can you ask for from a debut match? These two simply didn’t have bad matches, which makes sense given their talent and styles.

Sting is ready for Flair.

WCW Hotline ad.

Ad for Batman Forever for the SNES. That game SUCKED. You use Down + R to use the grappling hook yet X and Y aren’t used at all. See the problem?

We come back from break to see…hang on I need a moment here. Ok I’m good. We come back to Hulk Hogan at Hulk Hogan’s Pastamania. Hulk Hogan had a pasta restaurant in the Mall of America, complete with a dish called Hulk A-Roos. You can’t make this stuff up at all. He cuts a generic promo but the kids around him are loving it. The guy was great with kids, I’ll give him that. This was one of the biggest jokes in wrestling history though, but it did show how huge and mainstream Hogan was.

US Title: Sting vs. Ric Flair

I’ll give Nitro this: they got the card spot on for the first show. You have a cruiserweight match that’s going to be awesome and was, you have this which is more or less impossible to screw up, and Hogan vs. a big man in the main event. They played things safe here and that’s all they needed to do. And now we get the defining moment for Nitro until Hall showed up: Lex Luger walks down the aisle and stares at Sting and Flair.

Now that doesn’t sound very interesting does it? The thing you have to remember, Luger had been in a WWF ring wrestling the day before. This was the first big shock and since the internet was more or less a non factor for the most part back then, this was a shocking thing. No one knew this was coming and it really did set the tone for Nitro and WCW in the future as Luger was immediately in the main event picture.

The announcers have no clue what to say to this and even though Bischoff knew it was coming, he’s playing it off well. Sting was the perfect choice to put on the show here as he had the speed, the power, the mat wrestling ability, the look, the charisma and the talking ability to be remembered really well. He didn’t have to do much as he hits his third gorilla press, but the crowd is eating it up. Why mess with what works? Make that four of them.

His strength is overlooked quite a bit. We go to a break and when we come back we have a wide shot of the Mall and it looks VERY cool. It’s a three story mall and you have all kinds of people shopping around and we just happen to have a major wrestling show going on. Arn Anderson walks out as Sting misses a splash. Arn and Flair had been having a lot of problems lately and would finally fight at Fall Brawl.

They play up the shock value to a T here about Luger and the unpredictability aspect of the show. Sting hits a top rope suplex. The announcers’ reactions: Bischoff says the ring moved two feet, McMichael says his monitor nearly fell off the table and Heenan says his monitor went black. I wish I was making this up. Flair gets the figure four but Arn comes into the ring for the DQ and he and Flair go at it.

Rating: C+. Again, this is hard to get wrong. It wasn’t one of their better ones, but it wasn’t supposed to be. It got them in front of a TV camera and showed the fans what they had coming. This was a lot like the debut of a new promotion in a lot of ways as no one really knew what to expect here.

They kind of had to restart a lot of things in the early weeks to give the people a feel for what they were all about. The match was fine and they did their regular good stuff, but this was about angles and not the match and that’s fine.

Scott Norton comes out to yell about not being on the show despite having a contract. Savage comes out to yell at him. They set up a match for next week. It’s so adorable that Norton thinks he means something outside of Japan.

Sabu is coming. Dang it.

Some guy from Alabama wins a sweepstakes. This took 10 seconds of ring time.

Ad for Saturday Night, featuring a double main event: Johnny B. Badd vs. Dick Slater and Sting and Macho vs. the Bluebloods. And people wonder why the fans were very happy Nitro debuted.

Mr. Wallstreet is coming to WCW. It was IRS going JBL’s gimmick. This went badly. He even mentions the IRS. Seriously?

WCW Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Big Bubba Rogers

Rogers is Big Boss Man’s 15th or so gimmick. We go to a commercial before Hogan’s entrance and we get a SLIM JIM AD! Oh and there’s one for Hot Pockets too. Jimmy Hart has stars and stripes pants and a jacket. He looks like a walking barber pole. The fans are going nuts for Hogan if nothing else. What are you expecting here?

It’s Hogan vs. big man 101, Like I said earlier they’re playing it very safe and that’s fine. Bubba gets in his offense and Hogan makes a comeback and slams him before the leg drop ends it in about five minutes. A clean pin on Nitro. That won’t happen that often.

Rating: C. It’s exactly that: average. There was nothing special here but it wasn’t unwatchable or anything. No one was expecting an epic showdown here as it was just Hogan defending his title in a token title defense. Nothing wrong with that.

The Dungeon of Doom which had been feuding with Hogan hit the ring and Luger makes the save. Macho and Sting show up to calm them down. This would be your main event at Fall Brawl. Sting, Hogan, Luger and Savage vs. Shark (Earthquake), Zofdiac (Beefcake) Meng and Kamala. I wonder who wins that.

We go to commercial and see an ad for the Muscular Dystrophy Association which sponsored Fall Brawl for some reason. That’s just odd. There’s also an ad for the Eagles vs. Cardinals game. Dang that would have sucked.

Luger says he wants a title shot. Hogan says sure but says he’ll be champion forever and a day. I love delusions of grandeur that almost came true. They make the match for next week and that’s it.

Overall Rating: B+. For a debut show, this was great. They advanced a lot of stuff and set up next week and the future pretty well. With only an hour they did quite well but remember there was no Raw tonight. The ratings were good but they lost for a good while. The wrestling was ok and we got three kinds of matches and angles were advanced so I’d say very good job here. Things would get far worse for awhile though.

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Portland Wrestling
Date: September 3, 1983
Location: Portland Sports Arena, Portland, Oregon
Commentators: Dutch Savage, Don Coss

This is another of those companies that I’ve never gotten around to but a lot of big names made the rounds here over the years. Officially the company is called Pacific Northwest Wrestling but everyone referred to it as Portland. The biggest name who was a regular in the territory was probably Roddy Piper but he was off to Crockett by this point. I have no idea what to expect here so let’s get to it.

Assuming the date is accurate, this was on a Saturday.

In something I don’t think you’ll ever hear again, the announcers talk about the post show dark match, saying you wish you came to the arena now that you’ve heard about it.

Dutch thinks it’s Memorial Day weekend so Don makes fun of him for a bit.

Mike Miller vs. Brian Adidas

Adidas was a friend of the Von Erichs and never did anything of note. Miller is a generic heel cowboy. The interesting thing here is promoter Don Owen as ring announcer. Feeling out process to start with Miller grabbing a rollup and a handful of trunks for two. Adidas grabs a headlock and takes Miller down to the mat as the announcers get coffee. Seriously they’re making sure they have the right cups.

Back up and Adidas snaps off some armdrags before getting caught in a headscissors. Adidas takes forever to get out of the hold, only to be put right back into it. Back to the headlock but a pull of Brian’s hair puts him back in the headscissors. Referee Sandy Barr (father of Art Barr) pulls Mike’s hair to break it up and Adidas sends him into the ropes.

Back up and the fans say they love Brian, only to see him caught in a chinlock. Adidas fights up and hits a backdrop for two, only to be punched in the ribs. A dropkick and a hiptoss put Miller on the floor. Mike snaps Brian’s neck on the ropes and chokes him for the VERY lame DQ.

Rating: D. Way too long and dull here for that ending. I’ve seen two Brian Adidas matches now and I have no desire to see a third. The guy just isn’t interesting at all and has nothing that separates him at all from other wrestlers. Miller was even more generic and we got to sit through ten minutes of these guys doing nothing special.

House show schedule.

Al Madrill vs. Jules Strongbow

The announcers talk about Andre the Giant coming to the area soon. It’s almost strange to hear about him still as a traveling guy. Feeling out process to start with Jules taking him down to the mat by the arm. Back up and Strongbow grabs the arm again before hooking a full nelson. Madrill counters into one of his own and this is going nowhere at all. He slams Jules down for two and complains about the count.

Jules slams Al down and the referee counts a VERY fast two in a funny bit. It works so well that they do the exact same bit before Madrill takes him down in a front facelock. Madrill hits the referee in the back and blames Jules before doing the exact same sequence again. Madrill does it a third time but gets caught, sending him running out to the floor.

Back in again and Madrill (I keep wanting to say Mandrill) slams Jules down again and gets the slowest two count ever. Now Madrill shakes Strongbow’s hand and they trade more slams. They both try slams at the same time for a stalemate. Now they both try double leg drops and they rock back and forth on the mat to a time limit draw.

Rating: D. Well this was funny at times I guess but when you do the same jokes over and over again, they stop being funny and start being annoying. Neither guy was interesting and the few funny bits here didn’t make up for the complete lack of good action. When I want to see Jules’ brother Jay, you can tell the match is nothing to see.

Here’s top heel Rip Oliver and his Clan. Oliver complains about Curt Hennig and Billy Jack (Haynes, big star in Portland) double teaming the Assassin, costing them $3000 in a recent match. Oliver wants another six man tag with the Clan (himself, Assassin and Dynamite Kid) vs. Hennig/Billy Jack/Buddy Rose. Assassin runs his mouth a bit before Oliver says he wants another six man tag. If Hennig’s team loses, Oliver will head back east, never to be seen again. Dynamite has a cowbell for some reason.

Assassin/Dynamite Kid vs. Buddy Rose/Curt Hennig

This is 2/3 falls. Before the match we’re told that Oliver and Assassin won the tag titles back a few days earlier. Also Owen picks now to announce Andre and Harley Race are coming soon. After about four minutes of disrobing, Hennig, who looks about 15 years old here, starts with Dynamite in what would be an awesome match four years from now. Dynamite flattens Hennig with a shoulder but Curt snaps up to a standoff. Off to a headlock by Kid before Assassin comes in. The announcers are talking about alcoholism for some reason.

The fans keep cheering for Curt but he gets dropped by a double headbutt. Hennig comes back with a big sunset flip for two on Dynamite but it’s back to Assassin. Apparently Hennig is Pacific Northwest Champion. Hennig fires off a right hand and a fireman’s carry but Dynamite breaks up the hot tag attempt. We hit the chinlock from Assassin but Curt finally fights up. Dynamite saves another hot tag and hits a top rope fist to give Assassin two. Kid comes in legally for another long chinlock but Hennig fights up and avoids a knee, allowing for the tag off to Rose.

Buddy cleans part of the house but gets caught in a few armdrags, only to come back with some dropkicks. Assassin tries a sunset flip but Rose rolls forward into a cradle for the first fall. Hot finish there. During the break between falls, Hennig, Rose and Hayes accept the challenge for the six man tag.

Back to the match with Rose hitting a quick dropkick on Assassin to send him to the floor. Assassin gets back in and takes over thanks to a cheap shot from Dynamite. Kid comes in legally and sends Rose into the buckle before dropping a knee for two. Back to Assassin for a knee drop of his own, followed by a standing knee to send Rose to the floor. Curt helps his partner back in but Rose is caught in a quick chinlock as the match keeps going.

Rose fights up as Dynamite tries to come in to break up the tag, only to have Curt make the save. Rose, known as a big guy, nips up but walks into a loaded headbutt from Assassin for the second fall. After a break we come back for another promo from the face guys. Curt talks about the people giving his team an edge over the Clan to be a good suck up. Rose says all three guys want a shot at NWA World Champion Harley Race.

We’re running out of TV time here and the third fall begins with Assassin pounding on Rose in the corner. Dynamite comes back in to crank on the arm and stomp on it on the mat. Not that it matters as Buddy gets over to the corner for the hot tag to Hennig. House is cleaned and the heels get caught in stereo abdominal stretches (big move back then), only to draw Oliver in for the DQ.

Rating: B. If you drop the promos in between the falls and have a better finish, this would have been a great match. The crowd was WAY into this and it’s easy to see why these guys would become big stars in the near future. The ending sets up the big six man in the near future and we got a good match out of it as well. Nice stuff here.

Billy Jack comes in and goes after Oliver but the numbers and the cowbell are too much for him. The good guys bail before they get beat up worse and a staredown ends the show.

Actually scratch that as the Clan shouts a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a show I’d watch weekly if you replace the horrible opening stuff with something even remotely good. The crowd was hot all night long and the main event, which ran nearly half an hour, was very solid stuff. The talent in the main event was high level stuff and the main story is interesting. Dynamite would take the title from Curt four days later to keep things going. Good stuff here but man alive it was looking bad after the first two matches.

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