Monday Nitro #51
Date: September 2, 1996
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 5,893
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

Tonight we get the fifth member of the NWO, meaning it’s time for this thing to really take off. Also we only have two more weeks to go until Fall Brawl which is where the biggest WCW storyline ever comes up. Tonight the main event is an 8 man tag with the Horsemen vs. the Dungeon of Doom which sounds like it’ll either be good or a trainwreck. Let’s get to it.

Oh and this is Labor Day 96, which is the day in 95 where the show started.

We get clips from last week with the NWO spray painting the truck and DiBiase showing up.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Alex Wright

These two had a good match on a Clash I recently reviewed so hopefully this is good. Page tries to take Wright down but walks into a spinewheel kick to send him to the floor. Wright dives to the floor and Page is in trouble early. A slingshot splash gets two. We talk about Page’s feud with the Guerreros and Larry gets in a good line with “Page should have feuded with someone with a smaller family.”

Sitout powerbomb gets two and Page sets for the Diamond Cutter. Wright counters and the German tries a German, only to reverse with some elbows. Wright hits a belly to belly for two…and then gets kicked in the ribs and the Diamond Cutter ends this. The fans popping for the Cutter is a tell tale sign of things to come.

Rating: C+. Pretty good match here with Wright being his usual high flying self. The key thing to Page became that he was able to hit the Cutter from every possible angle and it made him incredibly popular in the same vein as Jake Roberts who had a hand in training Page, showing that psychology can be taught.

Nick Patrick is accused of being slow on the count in this match. I didn’t exactly see that but you don’t argue with Gene Okerlund.

Colonel Parker has a gift for Sherri and says that Harlem Heat is going to the ring on their own. Sherri’s nickname is Twinkle Eyes. The present is a leather vest and leather chaps. I think sex is implied.

Tag Titles: Harlem Heat vs. Greg Valentine/Buddy Valentino

Mark Curtis makes his debut as a referee. Valentino looks like a fatter Buddy Landell. Ted Dibiase is here. Again the wrestling idea of two random people who have never teamed before being #1 contenders comes up again here. Hammer pounds away on Booker in the beginning of a slow match. Off to Valentino who is fat and gets beaten up for his efforts. Side kick gets two. Harlem Hangover and we’re done.

Rating: D+. Boring squash and again I ask: why (from a kayfabe perspective) would a team like Valentine and Valentino get a title shot? It’s one of those things that I never understand in wrestling. Anyway the match was bad but the Heat would drop the titles to Public Enemy for about two weeks soon before getting them back to lose them to the Outsiders at I think Halloween Havoc.

Harlem Heat says they’re ready for the Nasty Boys at Fall Brawl. The Nasties jump them during the interview. This goes on for awhile and Booker takes a spike piledriver.

Dean Malenko vs. Chris Jericho

Mike Tenay sits in on commentary. He goes into the history of the guys and we can see why he was called the Professor. Nick Patrick is referee here again and Jericho takes over with some spin kicks. There’s an ECW chant. Dean fights back with a brainbuster for two. Off to a chinlock by Malenko and DiBiase gets up to leave. Dean, the heel here, hooks a headscissors on the mat but Jericho channels the powers of Canada to get up into an electric chair drop to escape.

Dean cheats some more by holding the rope in an abdominal stretch. After Jericho escapes Dean goes up and spins in mid air to hit a bulldog. This is a lot more of a chess match than the usual match you would get. Both guys head to the floor but Jericho is able to get back in and hit a baseball slide and the springboard dive to take over. Missile dropkick gets two but Dean counters a tombstone into a tombstone (it’s not like you can do much else out of that) for two.

The Canadian hits a German on the American for two. Spinwheel kick by Jericho looks to set up something off the top but, and here’s the real shock, Jericho gets too cocky and it allows Dean to get back up. The American tries a German on the Canadian but Jericho rolls through for the pin in a victory roll for an upset.

Rating: B-. Good high flying stuff here with Jericho getting the upset win to make him into a bigger deal. When your big win is against JL on Saturday Night there’s not much to talk about. This was rather fun though and both guys were moving out there. It helps that they had about 9 minutes to work with also and you got a good TV match out of it.

Video on Mysterio and Super Calo who are fighting for the Cruiserweight Title at the PPV.

The Giant vs. Brad Armstrong

The good thing here is that we’re told why Savage wants to fight Giant: Savage blames Giant for dropping the ball at Hog Wild. NOW WHY WAS THAT SO HARD TO EXPLAIN LAST WEEK??? Tony calls Giant the top heavyweight in the world right now. Wouldn’t that be Hulk? The limo has arrived out back. Armstrong tries but he’s no match for the Giant. This actually gets some time as Giant is supposed to be distracted. And there’s the chokeslam so never mind.

Hogan talks about being champion. Oh and the NWO win WarGames. That takes about three minutes to get through.

It’s hour #2 now.

The announcers talk about last week and DiBiase’s stuff. The NWO painting the truck and beating up the guys at the end of the show is also shown again.

Randy Savage vs. Ron Studd

They did this match with Benoit as he was about to face Giant. It’s a good idea because it lets Savage get some experience against a much bigger guy. As is his custom in this time period, Savage gets beaten up and we cut to the NWO limo with someone getting out of it but Hogan and the Outsiders say get the camera out of here before we see who it is. They say a name which is a hint but I’ll save it for later because it’ll give it away. Savage takes it to the floor and rams his throat across the railing for the axe handle. A slam and the elbow end this quick. Just a workout for Savage.

Savage talks about Hogan and Halloween Havoc rather than the Giant. He’s going to be living in Vegas now or something like that.

Steiner Brothers vs. Sting/Lex Luger

I’m thinking this isn’t going to be as good as SuperBrawl I was. Before the bell we cut to the back and see the Horsemen running out to the limo but it’s empty. They’re in the building. After a break we’re back with the match. The fans barking is always confusing at first because it sounds like booing. Lex and Rick start us of….and there’s a bell. Nick Patrick (do they have another referee?) disuqlifies Luger and Sting because Rick shoved Luger into him and Luger brushed against Patrick. This lasted all of 35 seconds and I had to rewind it to see what the DQ was for.

Four Horsemen vs. Dungeon of Doom

It’s the Faces of Fear, Big Bubba and Kevin Sullivan. Sullivan vs. Mongo to get us going. I’m not sure that’s the best combination but we’ll get to the better stuff soon. Mongo takes a double stomp to the chest and instead of hurting him, it fires him up. A shoulder block brings Bubba in and they’re on the floor already. Off to Benoit vs. Barbarian and Sullivan’s interference doesn’t work.

The cops are in the back for some reason. Here’s Flair to a huge pop. And let’s get away from the guy the fans want to see as we need to watch Sting and Luger chase Nick Patrick. Patrick runs towards the limo but turns away from it instead. Ted DiBiase is getting into the limo so Sting throws a brick through it, because every major sports arena has a pile of readily available bricks next to it. The limo drives off so Sting and Luger steal a cop car and chase after it. This is never going to be prosecuted is it?

Back to the ring and it’s Flair vs. Meng. Flair hits him low and the referee is cool with that. Bischoff actually mentions that Sting and Luger will be going to jail. We cut to the back and see the police guard calling in the stolen cop car. Yeah because THIS was necessary to see instead of the match right? Barbarian slams Anderson and drops an elbow so he can load Anderson into the Tree of Woe.

Anderson hammers on Bubba and counters a Meng piledriver. After a break Anderson falling into a tag to Benoit and things start to break down. We get to Sullivan vs. Benoit and I’d believe this is at least partially shoot. The Dungeon beats Benoit down and the Horsemen are busy thinking of ways to beat up Dusty Rhodes I guess because they don’t bother making the save. Flair breaks up a pin off a spinebuster and everything breaks down again.

They head to the floor and Flair grabs a chair as Bischoff plugs a Muhammad Ali documentary. Back inside and Bubba does the really stupid looking spot where you intentionally jump into the other guy’s boot. Off to Sullivan and Benoit who get to chop each other a lot. The Faces of Fear beat up the Canadian a bit but Benoit hits a cross body out of nowhere but gets double teamed again.

Things break down a little bit as Anderson plants Bubba with a spinebuster but Barbarian breaks up the tag. This has been going about 15 minutes already so it’s getting a lot of time and that’s including the time in the back. The Faces of Fear try a double top rope headbutt but Benoit rolls away and FINALLY gets the tag, bringing in Naitch. Everything breaks down for about the 5^th time and Flair puts the Figure Four on Sullivan and Woman does….something to help Flair get the pin with the hold still on.

Rating: C+. Long match here as it went nearly 20 minutes. It’s a good example of how long doesn’t make it good though as this match is really just ok. Benoit and Sullivan kept trying to have this big brutal feud but it just went on forever with the same brawls and it stopped being good after about the first two. Anyway, not bad here but nothing more than that.

The NWO comes in immediately and beats down everyone. Here comes the Giant for the big save….and he chokeslams Meng to become the fifth member of the NWO. The hint earlier was Hogan told the big man to get out of the limo. Savage comes out with a chair and has better success than 8 guys did earlier before getting Hogan in a corner. Hogan goes Angle and takes Savage down by the legs and the numbers catch up with Savage so the beating can begin. Savage gets a yellow streak painted up the back.

The NWO storms the announcers’ booth and Giant says it’s about money and power and all that jazz. Hogan says there are six members now but I’m not sure if he’s foreshadowing or just can’t count. The Horsemen and the Dungeon come back and the fight starts all over again. Giant comes back and destroys the announce table to end it.

Overall Rating: B. Hard to argue with this show as you had some good wrestling and a big twist in the ending. This would look like nothing after what’s coming next week though which my mother, a fan that grew up watching Jerry Lawler in Memphis, saw through instantly but we’ll get to that in a minute. Anyway, good show here as they’ve got the drama stuff down pretty solidly now.

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Smackdown
Date: August 31, 2012
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

After last week’s huge mess, hopefully Smackdown can turn things around tonight. Last week was one of the worst shows I can remember in a long time, which is a shame as I used to love Smackdown. Anyway, we’re getting very close to Night of Champions now and unfortunately, Del Rio hasn’t been hit by a bus or anything like that to keep us from having to sit through another title shot for him. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine at the moment is Del Rio vs. Sheamus. I can’t stand this feud and about 80% of that is on Del Rio.

Orton vs. Ziggler later. Gee I wonder how that’s going to end.

Here’s Sheamus to open the show. First up, he needs to praise HHH. Sheamus isn’t sure what HHH’s future holds but he has Sheamus’ respect. HHH is the embodiment of a champion, which is everything Del Rio isn’t. This brings out Damien Sandow of all people. He talks about how Sheamus is as ignorant as he is enormous because of his praise of HHH.

He goes on about Sheamus and HHH promotes a stereotype to the WWE Universe but Sheamus cuts him off. The champ doesn’t want to hear Sandow yap for twenty minutes so why not come into the ring right now and have a fight. Sandow says Sheamus isn’t worth his time but here’s Booker with a dissenting opinion. He makes Sandow vs. Sheamus for later, which is already more exciting than anything else from last week.

Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody talks about how Rey is just like Sin Cara, hiding behind a mask. Rhodes uses his power advantage to start but he ducks his head, letting Rey get in a kick to the face. Cody sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a spinning suplex for two. A release gordbuster gets two followed by some knees to the back and a chinlock.

Cody goes for the mask but gets sent face first into the buckle. Rey speeds things up and hits a seated senton followed by a big kick to the head for two. A knee to Rey’s head gets two but Mysterio kicks Cody into 619 position. Cody catches Rey’s legs but Rey counters the counter into a sunset flip for the pin at 5:31 shown of 9:01.

Rating: C. This was fine. It’s nice to see Cody having an actual story on Smackdown instead of doing nothing on Superstars every other week. I didn’t catch anything being mentioned about Rey and Cody’s history, although at least we’re hearing about how Cody used to be obsessed with his looks to give a reason to the Sin Cara feud.

Cody beats up Rey post match until Cara makes the save and puts a Sin Cara mask on Cody.

We get the first anger management segment from Monday.

Kaitlyn vs. Natalya

Eve is on commentary. Nattie takes her down with a headlock to start and the place is eerily quiet. Kaitlyn shoulder blocks her down and they head to the floor where Kaitlyn gets her head slammed into the floor. Natalya hooks an abdominal stretch and slaps Kaitlyn’s side which has to hurt bad. Kaitlyn comes back with some armdrags but Natalya clotheslines her down. The Canadian runs her mouth and gets small packaged for the pin at 2:45. Getting extra time is helping the Divas a tiny bit but this was more about Eve, who spent the whole match being the corporate suckup, which does nothing for me at all.

Booker is worried about the pressure of being Raw GM is getting to AJ. He says the match between Jericho and Ziggler never should have been made. Vickie comes up and says this is more proof that AJ needs to go. Sweet Christmas enough with the power struggle storylines already.

Raw ReBound talks about Punk/Lawler/Cena from Monday.

Anger management segment #2.

Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow

Sandow is taken into the ropes to start and requests that the referee does his job. Sandow tries to take it into the corner but Sheamus grabs his beard. To avoid getting punched in the face, Damien drops to the floor and things slow down again. The champ starts running him over with shoulders and Sandow heads to the floor again. This time Sheamus is tired of waiting so he goes out after Damien, only to have his knees sent into the steps by Sandow.

That gets an eight count and Sandow stomps away back inside. Off to a chinlock which Sheamus breaks pretty quickly. A regular neckbreaker (as opposed to the double arm version) gets two for Sandow and it’s back to the chinlock. This one is broken even faster and Sheamus starts his hard hitting offense.

Damien bails to the floor for the third time but Sheamus throws him right back in and hits the ten forearms. A slingshot shoulder block to the back gets two and Damien heads to the floor for I think the fourth time. White Noise is escaped and the Brogue Kick is ducked. Sandow rolls to the floor and sprints up the ramp for the countout at 6:51.

Rating: C. This wasn’t a great match, but it was a logical one. The idea of Sandow not being able to hang in a fight with Sheamus makes perfect sense and having him constantly trying to run and clear his head was a nice touch. This is exactly what Sandow needs: to be able to rub elbows with bigger names. He didn’t need to win here and certainly shouldn’t have, but having him in there is a good step in the right direction.

Prime Time Players vs. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd

Kidd and Gabriel have matching yellow shirts which look like dresses on them. Kidd and Titus get things going as the Usos Tout about how they should be #1 contenders. Off to Young vs. Gabriel after the starters do nothing of note. Justin takes Young to the mat after making a blind tag, allowing Kidd to kick Darren in the face.

Off to Titus who powers Tyson down and brings Darren back in. The Players are very good about tagging in and out quickly. Tyson sends Young into the corner and tags out to Justin. An STO puts Darren down and Justin loads up the 450, only for Titus to distract him. Darren crotches Gabriel and hits the fireman’s carry gutbuster for the pin at 3:13. This one looked better as he launched Gabriel into the air and Justin was in free fall when he hit the knees.

Rating: C. I know I’ve used that rating a lot tonight but this was exactly what the rating implies: it was ok and right in the middle. I do like that the guys in the tag division are actually getting a little time every week. If nothing else it lets a lot more guys get on TV as opposed to showing up every other PPV and have a title defense that means nothing. These matches don’t exactly equal the Harts vs. the Bulldogs but they’re an improvement over what we’ve been getting the last few years.

The final anger management segment airs. Kane’s explanation of his history is still hilarious.

Here’s Del Rio with something to say. Alberto brags about beating Orton last week but doesn’t care to be reminded that Sheamus has beaten him every time. Del Rio threatens Josh but here’s Kane for protection I guess. Kane says he’s here to apologize for attacking Josh at Summerslam. Teddy comes out and makes Kane vs. Alberto.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kane

This is joined in progress after a break but it doesn’t look like we missed much. Kane pounds on Del Rio in the corner but Alberto comes back with some kicks to the legs. Kane comes back with a low dropkick to the head for two and an uppercut that sends Del Rio to the apron. Del Rio rams Kane’s arm into the buckle and follows it up with a kick to the shoulder. Kane will have none of that and hits a sidewalk slam to set up the top rope clothesline for no cover. Kane loads up the chokeslam but Ricardo pulls Kane’s leg. The distraction lets Del Rio hit a Backstabber for the pin at 2:46.

Post match Kane snaps and chokeslams Josh, but he apologizes while he does it.

HHH video from Raw.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler dropkicks Randy down to start and struts a bit. Dolph shows off a bit so Randy dropkicks him down as well in a nice touch. A slingshot suplex gets two on Dolph but Ziggler comes back with a neckbreaker and some elbow drops. Orton wins a slugout and fires off his clotheslines. The powerslam sets up the elevated DDT but Ziggler counters. Ziggler doesn’t get back inside though and Orton pulls him to the top rope for a superplex.

That only gets two and Ziggler comes back with a jumping DDT for another near fall. The crowd is starting to get into this. Dolph charges at Randy but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for another two. Orton was laughing while he hit that which was kind of a nice touch. They head to the floor with Ziggler being thrown over the announce table. Back inside and Ziggler misses the Zig Zag, allowing the RKO to pin him at 7:10.

Rating: C+. This was a fast paced main event style match, but man alive did they have to have Ziggler lose AGAIN? Orton is leaving for a few months to film whatever the next WWE movie is. Ziggler is indeed Mr. MITB and probably will win the title before the year is over, but as always in WWE, the idea seems to be to have him lose time after time so he can surprise everyone and win it all back at once. You know, because no heel can look strong in WWE and they all have to be cowards that steal every win they get.

Vickie immediately announces that Dolph is still Mr. MITB and says he did a good job. Yes, make sure you hammer in that the guy who is going to get a title match is such a loser.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t a great show at all but man alive was it better than last week. It’s amazing how much better things are when you don’t have Alberto and Sheamus interacting. Seeing Sandow getting a match against the champ, even when he was mostly dominated and lost, was a good sign that there are big things in his future. This show toned down the stupid stuff and they got a better show out of it.

Results

Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes – Sunset Flip

Kaitlyn b. Natalya – Small Package

Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout

Prime Time Players b. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd – Fireman’s carry gutbuster to Gabriel

Alberto Del Rio b. Kane – Backstabber

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

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NXT
Date: August 29, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, William Regal

It’s time for the title match tonight and I’m actually somewhat excited. This change officially turns NXT into its own regular promotion which is what it needed for the last year and a half or so. It’s Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins for the inaugural title, which is a matchup I didn’t think I’d like. Mahal is growing on me as a basic foreign heel and Rollins….well he’s energetic. Let’s get to it.

Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton vs. Hunico/Camacho

Jordan/Dalton won the first match between these teams. Regal calls the fans the NXT Universe now. Great. Now we’re hearing the same stupid lines from NXT that we hear on Raw and Smackdown. Jordan and Camacho start us off with Jordan getting in some basic offense before walking into a pretty good spinebuster. Camacho pounds on Jordan’s face and suplexes him down to bring in Hunico.

Back to Camacho after nothing of note and the bigger guy throws Jordan around with a nice butterfly suplex. A legdrop gets two but Jordan escapes a suplex and tags in Dalton. Dalton hits a spinwheel kick and a charge in the corner, followed by a hurricanrana for two. A missile dropkick gets two on Hunico and everything breaks down. As Jordan is being put back on the apron, Camacho hits Dalton from behing, allowing Hunico to hit his version of an Angle Slam for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: C. This was your run of the mill tag match between four guys who aren’t that interesting but they made it work well enough. Hunico and Camacho are fine for a low level tag team and giving the unknowns a win over them in the first match was a good way to give Dalton and Jordan some exposure. As is the case with almost everyone on NXT though, they need ring time.

Here are the Usos with something to say. They call out the Ascension and as the lights go out for Ascension’s entrance, Ascension runs in from behind and jumps the Usos, laying them out with relative ease.

Raw ReBound is about Punk vs. Lawler. I’m still curious as to when Cena forgot hot to climb a cage.

Big E. Langston vs. Chase Donovan

A clothesline and that falling slam thing gets the pin at 40 seconds. He really needs to change finishers. A powerslam would be fine.

The locker room comes out to watch the title match.

Langston says nothing.

Howard Finkel is doing the announcing for the main event.

Dusty comes out and JR is now on commentary.

NXT Championship: Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins

They have a ton of time for this. Fink may be fat and older now (he’s only 62 so he’s hardly ancient), but that voice is still perfect. Mahal won’t shake Dusty’s hand before the match. Rollins tries to take him to the mat to start but Mahal gets back up quickly. A dropkick puts Mahal down again and Rollins hits a hard chop. Mahal gets sent to the floor but he avoids a dive and sends Rollins face first into the apron. A suplex onto the ramp has Rollins in trouble and we head back in.

We take a break and come back with Rollins in even more trouble. Mahal stomps him down and hits a backbreaker to start setting up the camel clutch. Rollins gets choked against the ropes and the fans are behind Rollins now. He tries a comeback but gets kneed in the face by Mahal to take him back down. The camel clutch is escaped so Mahal pounds him in the back again. An enziguri out of nowhere puts Mahal down and Rollins punches Jinder down.

Mahal goes up for another knee but Rollins knocks him off the top and out to the floor. Rollins hits a HUGE dive to the floor and both guys are down. Back in and Seth goes up again, only to get crotched and superplexed from the top. We take another break and come back with the two of them slugging it out. Mahal might have a bad knee but he pulls off a sitout slam for two. A full nelson slam is countered and Rollins goes to the apron.

Seth hits an enziguri to the head and a running knee for two. The near falls are getting closer and closer here. A running forearm in the corner staggers Mahal but he manages to drop Rollins face first into the buckle. The low superkick (I think he calls it Avada Kadavra, making Rollins awesome) gets two. Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Mahal hits the full nelson slam for two. Rollins gets to the rope before the clutch can go on and Rollins rolls him up for two. Rollins comes back with the buckle bomb and the Blackout out of nowhere for the pin and the title at 14:24 shown of 21:24.

Rating: B. I’m still not wild on Rollins’ in ring work but the fans are into him and he’s not dull. He also needs a new finisher as the Blackout looks pretty forced to put it mildly. As for the match though, they did a great job of building both guys up as unbeatable and then having them go at it. The match was very good as far as making you wonder who was going to win and it turned into a good back and forth fight at the end. Not a masterpiece or anything, but for the first NXT Championship, this was more than acceptable.

Fink giving Rollins the NEEEEEEEEEEEEEW treatment makes the announcement much better. The roster puts Rollins on their shoulders to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was all about the main event so I’m not going to really bother thinking about the rest of it. Rollins is a good choice for a first champion as he can defend the title for a few months and then have a big time heel beat him to take the title. This felt like a big show and I wanted to see it, which is the right idea here. I’m very pleased with this and it worked quite well.

Results

Hunico/Camacho b. Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton – Reverse fireman’s carry slam to Dalton

Big E. Langston b. Chase Donovan – Over the shoulder mat slam

Seth Rollins b. Jinder Mahal – Blackout

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The Big Event
Date: August 28, 1986
Location: Exhibition Stadium, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 70,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jimmy Valiant, Ernie Ladd

You read the attendance right. This was by far and away the biggest crowd in North American history until about 8 months later when they got almost 20,000 more into the stands. This was about one match: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff. This was actually a really big house show as it was before PPV really got going and therefore this was just what the title says: A Big Event.

As you know I know my old school but I can only think of one other match on the card: Roberts vs. Steamboat. This would have been Summerslam had Summerslam existed yet though as it was easily bigger than Mania 2 and wouldn’t be trumped until next year in the biggest event of all time. So with all that being said, let’s get to this.

The opening is Gene in a helicopter talking about how awesome Toronto is which is interspersed with clips of the show. The crowd is VERY loud. This show is outside in case I forgot to mention that. I’ve heard between 65 and 74 thousand for the card but 70,000 is what I hear most. To put that into perspective, that’s more than Mania 6 or 17. This really does look freaking amazing.

Killer Bees vs. Hoss Funk/Jimmy Jack Funk

Hoss is more commonly known as Dory so we’ll go with that. Jimmy was a jobber and Dory was a former world champion. We get a wide shot and it just looks amazing. Dory and Brian Blair start us off. Jimmy does look a bit like Terry if nothing else. This has been all Bees so far.

Jimmy is wearing a mask for no apparent reason. Ernie Ladd never talks and it’s kind of annoying. The heels finally take over as I guess Dory just got bored out there. Ernie throws out this gem: he slammed him to the mat there with a move called a slam. That sums things up pretty well I’d say. The Bees put the masks on and cheat to get the win. There’s an echo on the mic which is cool for some reason.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener. It wasn’t a bad tag match at all and it got the crowd into things which is really all you can ask for in a match like this. It definitely could have used a minute or so off in the middle though.

King Tonga vs. Don Muraco

Both are heels here and Tonga is more commonly known as Haku/Meng. He looks weird in regular tights too. I think he’s supposed to be a face but he’s just not popular at all. He’s also referred to as both King Tonga and Haku. He works on the arm, like a lot. I mean he works on that thing like there’s no freaking tomorrow.

We’re at about 5 minutes of just arm work. Valiant and Ladd are rather annoying men. And now we hit a two minute nerve hold. I have a bad feeling I know where this is going to go. Good grief this is just boring. Nothing of note happens for the better part of ever and then we have a time limit draw at about seventeen of the twenty minutes. This was a waste of time.

Rating: D+. I hate matches like these. Draws are fine, but dang man this was just freaking boring. Haku using a high cross body was cool though. Either way, this just wasn’t interesting at all.

Ted Arcidi vs. Tony Garea

Garea is replacing Tony Atlas. I don’t know much about Garea but I suddenly want to laugh quite a bit. Arcidi is a big power guy and Garea is just generic as possible. The ropes keep making this weird sound when they hit them. Arcidi legitimately held the world bench press record for years. There must be a fight or something going on as a ton of fans are all looking to see something as the ropes are really getting annoying. Garea taps to a bear hug soon after this.

Rating: N/A. This was a total squash and wasn’t that interesting. He would be gone in a few months while Garea still works for the company behind the scenes today.

Jimmy Hart says he’ll get JYD tonight.

Adrian Adonis vs. Junkyard Dog

It’s so cool to see the thousands of people and have a row cut out in there for the guys to come through. It looks completely awesome. Hart has a freaking feather duster for some reason. Adonis is rather gay in case you weren’t familiar with him. He’s also about 400lbs here.

About two years before this he was a big deal actually as a biker character. I love that Dog’s theme song is about grabbing a girl’s hips. Adonis is bleeding pretty badly already. Ok apparently not as I refuse to listen to Ernie Ladd anymore.

Jimmy sprays perfume or cologne or whatever in Dog’s face to break the momentum though and Adonis goes to work. Dog no sells two megaphone shots and they fight on the floor. The referee gets to about 8 and then we go into the ring and Adonis is thrown into Hart and falls BACK OUT OF THE RING after being completely in for the count out. I think they botched that one.

Rating: D+. This was a standard 80s match but I don’t get the ending at all. It wasn’t any good which I would blame on the wrestlers and JYD is an annoying waste of oxygen as it is so there we are. This was just filler.

Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Dick Slater

Oh yeah Slater is the rebel. No one cares. Sharpe is up there with Horowitz and Brawler in the jobbing hall of fame. Mike likes to talk a lot. The announcers talk about how great Sharpe is. Really? From what I’ve read he was completely OCD so having this many people in the audience must have driven him insane.

There really isn’t much here as it’s really a glorified squash for Slater who would never mean a thing in wrestling, at least not in this company. He was ok in other companies but he’s at his best in ring stuff here, which isn’t saying much at all.

Monsoon wants to know why Sharpe has had his arm in a cast kind of thing for over 8 years and Valiant just starts screaming at him that he should go out to dinner with Sharpe and ask him because Valiant doesn’t know. That came out of nowhere. Anyway, Slater hits an elbow from the top and jackknifes (it’s a king of rollup, not the powerbomb) him for the win.

Rating: D. Did we really need six minutes of these two guys? I certainly wouldn’t think so. This wasn’t interesting or particularly good but a jobber got beat up so there we are.

I think we had an intermission here.

Heenan is with Gene and he’s in a 6 man here. He says he’ll unmask the Machines tonight. He gets in a great line with “We have 70,000 people here because Heenan is wrestling and wrestling is Heenan.” He also manages to get the entire crowd chanting weasel.

Big Machine/Super Machine/Lou Albano vs. Big John Studd/King Kong Bundy/Bobby Heenan

Ah yes the Machines. Now this was the epitome of a comedy angle that took off for a little while. The idea was that Andre the Giant was suspended for (kayfabe) not showing up for a match. Soon thereafter two new masked guys from Japan appeared: Super Machine (Ax from Demolition) and Giant Machine (duh).

Over the Summer they feuded with Heenan, Studd and Bundy with guest appearances by Piper Machine, Animal Machine and Hulk Machine. It was total tongue in cheek, kind of like Mr. America with Hogan. They were eventually joined by Big Machine who was Blackjack Mulligan when Andre could barely move.

Andre was kind of the manager and only wrestled occasionally. The angle ended about two months after this to set up Mania 3. Anyway let’s get to this. We get a shot from the broadcast booth and the ring is TINY. Studd and Super Machine start us out. The Machines’ strength is freaking impressive.

Ax is by far and away the smallest one. What does that tell you? Gorilla says he’s been over 500 pounds before but at Mania 4 said the biggest he ever wrestled at was 440. I don’t want to live in a world where I can’t trust Gorilla Monsoon! Ok I’m back now I think.

With Big Machine down Heenan comes in and goes for the mask. Super Machine is like screw that and drills him. Bundy was just a big fat waste of oxygen. You can tell he was just thrown into Mania. Look where he was just 4 months later. Heenan comes in again and Albano comes in also.

Super Mario kicks his head in for a bit but a thumb in the eye and the heels beat up Albano. Andre has had enough and just comes in there and starts cleaning house which causes the DQ. He was just freaking terrifying when he got mad. Ax being the smallest guy by far is a freaky sight.

Rating: C-. It was a comedy match so that’s fine. The Machines were just a fun team so this worked fine. Andre was very fun when he could move and this was no exception. It was nothing serious and it wasn’t supposed to be.

Jake Roberts vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is a Snakepit Match meaning anything goes. Roberts had DDTed Steamboat on the floor at a SNME and nearly killed him to ignite this feud which was the second biggest of the summer. Dragon had busted out a Komodo Dragon to counter Damien but neither are here tonight due to customs issues. The two commentators that talk say that the Canadian flag has an oak leaf on it.

Dragon dominates until we hit the floor where Jake takes over after a low blow. Steamboat gets a few chair shots in and that just was weird to type. Dragon just beats the tar out of him for awhile but gets reversed and goes over the top to the floor. Valiant thinks Roberts is a champion for some reason. Roberts is one of those guys that was supposed to be a heel but more or less became a face through just pure fan support.

Dragon starts bleeding after going into the post but fights out of the DDT. Jake is dominating now and getting face pops for it. And then he sits on Dragon’s chest and holds his arm up and you know the rest. They would have another match in a few weeks on SNME with the animals that I reviewed last night to close out the feud.

Rating: B. This was a very intense match. Street fights and the like simply didn’t happen in this era so this was insane at the time. Both guys were great workers so this worked out very well. Steamboat was about to have his throat messed up by Savage and you know the aftermath of that.

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules

As you may know this one happened at Mania 3 as well. Gorilla is on his own for this one which is likely the best case scenario. Hercules has the insane hair here, looking like Mike Knox but not as tall and we’re told that since this has happened Slick has taken over for Blassie’s contracts.

What that has to do with this match is beyond me as neither guy ever managed either of them that I remember. Heenan had Hercules by Mania. What a nice break it is to just have Monsoon talking as he is just so easy to listen to. Apparently Hercules is managed by Slick.

OH YEAH I remember Heenan buying him now. Slick owned him for like a cup of coffee I guess. There’s no heat at all for this match as the fans are just dead. To be fair though this is like the 8th match so far. Also based on what everyone has said it’s really cold in the stadium. Haynes gets a backslide to get a quick pin.

Rating: C-. The lack of heat just killed this and I can’t blame them. No one cared at all and it just wasn’t that interesting. Both guys would mean very little until Hercules got a mini push in the following year or two. Boring match though.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Dream Team

The Dream Team is Valentine and Beefcake who Valiant usually manages. The Rougeaus are wearing red for some reason. Oh great and Valentine is too. We get an abdominal stretch and naturally Monsoon complains. The Rougeaus are one of those teams that just flows so well that it’s amazing to say the least. They’re also great high fliers that can just show off, kind of like the Hardys or something like that. Good night there are a lot of people there.

This is your standard 80s tag match which means that it’s pretty good. Beefcake just sucked back I the day though and this is no exception. He would be replaced by Bravo at Mania 3. After a very long and drawn out match which thankfully got enough time, we hit the brawl and Valentine has the figure four. In a SWEET ending, the illegal Rougeau gets a sunset flip on him as he bends over to put the hold back on for the pin. I love that.

Rating: B-. This was another fun and good match that did its job well. It’s the second longest match of the night after the draw from earlier and it’s one of the better ones on the card. It was solid but the really needed to get Bravo out there ASAP. Valiant is ticked off over that ending.

Harley Race vs. Pedro Morales

They’re both old and they’re both fat. They’re also rather slow and it’s not interesting at all anymore. The main event is next so this is likely Hogan’s effort to make people forget the previous good match so that he looks good next. He did it to the whole company in about 8 years with WCW. The referees have more or less sucked all night as they never count fast enough. Race gets a double leg trip and uses the ropes for the easy pin.

Rating: N/A. This was just a filler to put some space between the two matches that were good and nothing more.

Hogan says he’ll win.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff

This is the hottest feud in the world as Orndorff had turned face to help Hogan with Piper and Orton but Hogan had more or less been a jerk (I don’t know about you but I’m STUNNED over that) to him and wouldn’t answer the phone when he was working out. Heenan then poked Orndorff into believing that Hogan didn’t ever care about him but that Heenan always would.

Orndorff, wanting to be accepted and not used, turned to the dark side and beat up Hogan at a big show to set up this which launched the hottest feud in perhaps ever at this point. This was the only reason that this whole show happened on such a huge stage, much like Hogan vs. Andre. The only difference here is that there wasn’t a Savage vs. Steamboat to balance it out. Also, Mania would have nearly 20,000 more people, or another Madison Square Garden on top of this. That’s just completely ridiculous.

They start off with just a big freaking brawl and the fans are WAY into this. This is more or less all punching and chasing until Heenan makes the stop and the heel takes over. Orndorff was a different kind of heel as instead of this big fat slob, he was small and athletic which was something new for Hogan. Also there were a lot of people that were siding with Orndorff as Hogan had really just been a massive jerk to him.

Ladd really likes kissing up to Hogan. He’s getting into Vince territory, but then again Hogan has muscles and Vince is way too obsessed with musclemen. GOOD NIGHT that referee is slow. Paul dominates until Hogan starts to Hulk Up. He uses a jumping knee to the back of Orndorff and the referee is crushed. Hogan imitates Orndorff with the arm in the air for the clothesline which is how Orndorff turned on him.

He goes for Orndorff’s piledriver but Heenan runs in with a wooden stool to blast Hogan in the head. Why he had that is beyond me. For no apparent reason the referee wakes up and taps Orndorff to say that Hogan wins by DQ. Hogan wakes up and kicks his head in for no apparent reason other than being a jerk. We get a replay with no commentary for no apparent reason before posing and credits take us out.

Rating: B-. This was all about the atmosphere and not about the match itself. Even still this was fine as both guys were over in their respective roles and this was indeed a huge match. Hogan going over unclean was smart as it gave Orndorff a reason for a rematch which was required so all was fine here. I’m not sure I get why Paul was disqualified but it was Hogan’s world so there we are.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s definitely recommended though. This was a lot like Mania 3 where the main event was the only selling point to this but that’s all it needed. 70,000 people was just completely unheard of back then so this was light years ahead of anything ever seen before and still ranks right up there for all time crowds.

The main event is awesome for feeling if nothing else and while the rest of the card sucks, the crowd gives it the atmosphere that makes it worth seeing. Think of this as a rehearsal for Wrestlemania before you watch it, which you should as it’s a fun show if you’re an old school fan.

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First ECW on TNN
Date: August 27, 1999
Commentator: Joey Styles

From the title I think you get the idea here. This show is weird as it’s a lot like the old WWF TV shows as it’s a collection of previously aired matches thrown together here. The first show they taped was awful so they turned it into this. The main thing is Lynn vs. Van Dam from Hardcore Heaven 99 which I’ll re-review and see how it matches up with the original rating I gave it, which is something I don’t think I’ve done before. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of the Dudleys (who would leave for WWF in like a week) powerbombing someone through a flaming table as Joey says this isn’t WCW or WWF but ECW.

Cue theme song. The main focus is Tazz who would leave in like 2-3 months and everyone knew that was going to happen.

Joey lists off a bunch of people to have held the TV Title but says RVD might be better than all of them.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

I think this is new commentary here but I’m not sure. This is really just a way to introduce Van Dam and give us what they know is an exciting match. You can’t hear a word the ring announcer is saying. They start with a nice sequence where neither can get any real advantage but the fans love it. We actually get highlights of both guys in the middle of the match. I get that you want to showcase two of your top guys but dude, do it when there’s not a match on.

Van Dam gets knocked to the floor and Lynn takes over. Lynn gets a top rope bulldog for two. RVD is bleeding from…..something. I think at this point we go to a commercial as we get an ad for Anarchy Rulz. Joey suggests the Warrior could be coming to ECW. Oh dear. Yeah the commentary here is new. Lynn is bleeding too now after botching a fall to the floor and hitting his foot on the ropes. The replay has a rap song with it. Really?

Lynn gets a sunset powerbomb for two. What would an ECW match be without tables? Van Dam’s eye is messed up and made of pretty colors. Van Daminator in the stands as this match is kind of hard to follow. Another commercial doesn’t help as they don’t stop the match for it, which is either a good idea or a bad idea and I’m not sure which. Lynn gets another sunset powerbomb through the table on the floor.

CUE THE RAP SONG REPLAY! After a clip or a commercial, Fonzie takes a chair pelted at his head. Lynn goes for a top rope belly to belly but he just falls off. You know the chant we get from that. Cradle Piledriver is blocked and both guys are down. Split Legged Moonsault hits Lynn. PAY ATTENTION MORRISON. THAT IS HOW YOU DO THE FREAKING MOVE. And there’s the Five Star out of more or less nowhere but Lynn rolls through for two. Van Daminator and a HUGE Five Star ends it.

Rating: B-. The clipping hurts this a lot. It makes this look like far less of an ultra competitive match and more like RVD just breaking a sweat. It’s still good but at the same time it really makes Lynn look weak. At the same time though this was about RVD and that worked very well. This was still good but a different kind of good. I gave the PPV version a B as I still find these matches to be overrated by most ECW fans.

We plug Rollerjam (which as a kid I thought was a cool show. The women were hot if nothing else) and then talk about the ECW World Title, listing off guys that didn’t win it but tried to, such as Konnan, Benoit, Austin and Foley. I’m not entirely sold on talking about guys that USED to be here, but you could look at it like this: We had these guys before they were superstars. Imagine what kind of buried treasures we have here now. That makes sense.

Shane threw down the NWA Title, which meant nothing to most fans watching this show but whatever. That was 5 years before the debut of the TV show. Didn’t know that.

ECW World Title: Taz vs. Rhyno

This is from Hardcore TV or a house show. Rhyno hits a powerbomb 3 seconds in and Taz just pops up. Rhyno means nothing at this point which you can probably guess. Well we’re in Chicago if nothing else. Taz is massacring him here with Rhyno looking like a freaking  jobber. He’s hit two punches to the ribs and a no sold powerbomb. Tazz sets up a table and Rhyno hits new levels of offense with THREE punches to the ribs. Suplex through the table sets up the Tazmission. Total squash if there ever has been one.

Rating: N/A. This was DOMINANCE which is the idea I guess, but Rhyno looks like a joke here. The problem is that these matches are just random defenses with no meaning to them. We keep hearing about Steve Corino and how he’s Taz’s archenemy, but we never even see him.

Video on Sabu who is apparently awesome. No match or anything but just highlights.

Ad for Anarchy Rulz again.

Spike Dudley vs. Big Sal

Low blow and Acid Drop end it. Literally that’s the whole thing. Who is Spike? Who is Sal? “Spike has done it again!” What does he do? Apparently that’s not important. Ah ok they call him the Giant Killer.

The Impact Players introduce themselves and we have no idea if they mean anything or not. Cyrus pops up for no apparent reason as Jason makes gay jokes about Joey. We see clips of the Impact Players beating people up which helps a bit as we know they’re dominant.

House show ads.

We get a BUNCH of clips of guys and a brief description (as in their nickname) of them. It’s set to a Kid Rock song so what do you expect here?

Taz talks about how TNN and ECW are together now and how cool that is I guess. We get clips of famous people he’s made tap out. He talks for like three minutes and that ends this mess.

Overall Rating: D. This was a total mess. Considering this is the first show, this was just awful as you learn nothing about the guys other than Taz being a tough guy and RVD is awesome. Other than that though you get nothing at all here though and other than a single good match to start, this gave us nothing. We have no idea about any feuds or angles or anything like that as it was just a few squashes and one big match from months earlier. This just didn’t work as Heyman clearly didn’t know what he was doing, which became a theme here. Bad show and just a car wreck of an hour.

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WWF House Show
Date: August 25, 1984
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon

I found a few shows from 1984 and now that I’m done with the book and the Wrestlemania redos I actually have time to get around to them. This is just after the Brawl to End it All the previous month, meaning this is either a very exciting time for wrestling or a bit of a downturn from the previous MSG show depending on how you look at it. The main event here is Santana defending the IC Title against Valentine which is almost always good stuff. Let’s get to it.

Chief Jay Strongbow vs. Kamala

Kamala has Freddie Blassie with him here. The match takes forever to get going as Kamala has to be prepped for the match by his handlers. Strongbow runs around to start but his chops have no effect at all. Kamala misses a splash in the corner so Jay tries a sleeper, only to be rammed into another corner. Strongbow is sent to the floor for a bit before Kamala chops him down back inside. We get a quick warpath from Strongbow but he runs into a foot in the corner and the splash ends Strongbow in a hurry. Not much to see here.

B. Brian Blair vs. Mike Sharp

This is way before the Killer Bees so Blair is just a guy. Apparently Sharp is called The Wimp. Feeling out process to start until Sharp bails into the ropes to escape a hammerlock. Blair kicks him into the corner and we get a few crisscrosses. A few armdrags put Sharp down and a dropkick sends him to the floor. Sharp tries to bring in a chair which goes nowhere of course.

Mike goes to the eyes like a good villain and pounds away with some forearms to the back. A guillotine across the top rope has Blair in trouble but he comes back with a monkey flip out of the corner. Blair headscissors him to the floor and into the crowd as the match slows down again. Back in and Sharp wants a handshake and tries to get one for almost two full minutes. Blair cranks on the leg to no avail so Sharp hits a few backbreakers to take over.

A slam doesn’t work for Brian so they slug it out for a bit with Sharp taking over again. Blair is sent to the floor and kicked in the head a little bit…..then he’s kicked more…..and more……until Blair finally slides under the ring and sneaks up on Sharp. You know, because Sharp isn’t going to notice Blair disappearing. Brian sneaks up on him and knocks Sharp to the floor so they can brawl to a double countout.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad but it just kept going. It ran over thirteen minutes with about four of those spent standing around. This is one of those things that you got a lot of back in this period: random matches which had no story and no reason for them fighting, which is why the matches had to be excellent. The problem is this never got close to excellent, as was the case most of the time.

Rick McGraw vs. Salvatore Bellomo

This would be another match just like the previous one. Sal takes him down with a headlock but McGraw fights out with some armdrags. Off to an armbar on Sal as the match slows WAY down. Sal fights up twice and gets put back in the hold both times. Bellomo counters into a wristlock and is put back into the armbar. We’re five minutes into this match and about three and a half of them have been spent on this armbar. You can see the draw coming from here.

Back up and they grab a test of strength with Sal going down into a bridge. McGraw drops down onto him but can’t break the bridge. Sal goes to a quick chinlock but gets countered into a hammerlock so we can lay around EVEN MORE. Back up again and Bellomo fires off some forearms….and put back in the armbar. Bellomo fights up and puts him onto the turnbuckle before backing away. The fans are booing this out of the building. Sal puts on a standing chinlock of all things as we’re somehow ten minutes into this disaster.

Since that’s too interesting, we go down into a headlock on the mat. We actually get an entertaining bit as McGraw monkey flips him over but Sal lands on his feet and hits a quick crossbody for two. That’s too much for them though and we head to the mat for another armbar on Bellomo. Sal sends him out to the floor as this somehow slows down even more.

A sunset flip gets two for McGraw and it’s time to brawl. They slug each other down to the floor before heading back inside for a backslide by Rick and things stop dead AGAIN. Sal starts working on the legs before they get up and collide with each other to lay down even more. Both guys try dropkicks and since that works so well let’s do it again! They do it a third time in a row before trading near falls until the time limit expires.

Rating: F. I think you get the idea here. For one thing, apparently this match had an 18:07 time limit and the decision was made to spend about half of that in armbars. I understand that the idea is to burn through some time on the card, but there’s no excuse for boring your audience like this. Seriously, do SOMETHING with that time. It can’t be that difficult. Bellomo would be jobbing clean to BOBBY HEENAN in a few months.

They raise each others’ hands post match.

Tag Titles: Adrian Adonis/Dick Murdoch vs. Wild Samoans

The Samoans are challenging here and are definitely the crowd favorites. The champions say they’re going to win. Lou Albano is guest referee here for some reason and gets caught talking to the champions in the back before the match. Adonis and Sika get things going but everything breaks down in just a few seconds. The Samoans clean house with Adonis being choked in the corner before bailing to the floor.

Back in and Sika knocks Adonis into the corner for a tag to Murdoch. Dick tries an elbow to Sika’s head which has no effect. I miss the days of the racial stereotypes. The champions have their heads rammed together and bail to the floor again. Back in and both champions are slammed down with Afa coming in to help out as well. Murdoch gets double clotheslined and Adonis bails to the outside.

Murdoch tries a sneak attack but rams the Samoans’ heads together to no avail. Dick charges into a knee in the corner and tries to tag in Afa out of confusion. Off to Adonis for a slugout and a sleeper on Afa who finally sends Adrian into the corner to escape. The champions change with no tag and Murdoch comes in to pound away even more. An atomic drop puts Murdoch down and it’s off to Sika. Adrian goes up and gets crotched as everything breaks down. The Samoans tale over but yell at Albano and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D. Not the worst match in the world but it was a lot of standing around until the lame finish. Presumably this sets up a later rematch, but it wouldn’t be anything I’d be interested in seeing based on what we just sat through. The Samoans wouldn’t be around much longer, but their family would be coming back for years on end.

The Samoans clear the ring post match.

Ken Patera vs. Pat Patterson

Patera is a legit strongman and was in the World’s Strongest Man competition. These two feuded for the IC Title back in 79 with Patera taking the title from Patterson so there’s an actual history here. Patera takes forever to strip off his warmup stuff and I have a feeling Patterson wasn’t complaining. We hear about Patera being the reason Monsoon retired before moving on to the Wepner vs. Andre the Giant match back in the 70s. In other words, the announcers are already bored and will talk about ANYTHING else to avoid the match.

Patera shoves Pat around to start before getting locked in an armbar. A cross body gets two for Pat and he pounds away to tie Ken up in the ropes. Patterson takes it to the mat and wraps Patera’s leg around the post. He stomps on Ken a bit but Patera pokes him in the eye to take over again. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Patterson comes back with a slingshot into the corner for two. Pat goes up but Patera rolls away before any jumping occurs. Patera comes back with a hot shot and the full nelson ends Patterson.

Rating: D+. Another lame match here but given who was in there I can’t say I’m that shocked. Patera would be put in jail about a year later for fighting with cops at a McDonalds and not many people would care. Patterson retired the next month, which actually surprises me as I didn’t know he was even around at this point.

Jesse Ventura says he’s going to beat up Ivan “Puduski” tonight and then he’s coming for Hogan.

Jesse Ventura vs. Ivan Putski

Putski jumps Ventura on the entrance and the fans are actually waking up a bit here. Ventura hides on the floor for a bit before going back in, only to be shoved right back to the outside. Ivan hooks a headlock and pounds on Jesse’s head a bit before kicking him to the floor again. Back in (again) and Ivan grabs Jesse by the beard to pound away on him even more. Ventura rolls to the floor again as the stalling continues.

The Body puts a top wristlock on the much shorter Ivan and pulls him to the mat by the hair, meaning we can lay around again! Putski fights up and knocks Jesse to the floor but Ventura gets in a shot on the way back inside. Jesse pulls out some kind of foreign object to choke Ivan but of course doesn’t get caught. Ivan steals it away and clotheslines Jesse with it before choking as well. The referee seems to be fine with this. They head to the apron with Jesse hitting him in the throat and getting back in for a countout win.

Rating: F+. You wouldn’t believe this match was twelve minutes long would you? Jesse was a master at doing absolutely nothing in a match but still getting booed and this was no exception. Putski continues to be one of the most worthless wrestlers I’ve ever seen, as he has nothing of note at all and the match was incredibly boring.

Fabulous Freebirds vs. Butcher Vachon/Ron Shaw/Pete Doherty

Now here’s a rarity for you. This is 2/3 falls and to the best of my knowledge, this is the ONLY match for the Freebirds (Michael Hayes, Buddy Roberts and Terry Gordy) in the WWF. The Birds are good guys here and it’s Hayes vs. Vachon to start things off. Feeling out process to start with Hayes avoiding a shot in the corner before it’s off to Shaw. Hayes puts on a headlock and kicks Shaw in the face for good measure. Off to Roberts who pounds away on Shaw for a bit as we seem to be in squash territory.

Gordy comes in for a one arm slam before it’s off to Doherty. Back to Roberts who chases Doherty into the corner for a tag to Vachon. A slam puts Butcher down and here’s Hayes again, only to have him miss an elbow drop. The unnamed team pounds on Hayes in the corner but Gordy comes in for a save. Michael slides through the legs and tags in Gordy for a cross body to pin Vachon for the first fall.

After a break we start the second fall with Gordy locking up with Vachon. A few slams put Butcher down and it’s off to Shaw again. This goes about as well as you would expect for a jobber against a team the company is trying to get over as Buddy snaps Ron’s neck over the top rope. Doherty comes in and starts some triple teaming on Buddy which goes nowhere so here’s Hayes again to pound away. Doherty misses a legdrop and everything breaks down. Gordy gets all fired up and Doherty is backdropped down. An elbow from Roberts gets the pin.

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of writing that but it’s another uninteresting match which just kept going. The Birds would be back to likely Texas soon after this as the WWF wanted to split them up. To be fair, a three man team was only going to be able to do so much in the WWF, so the Freebirds weren’t the best fit around here.

Roddy Piper vs. Jimmy Snuka

Ok, this MUST be better than anything else tonight. I mean, by pure talent alone it has to be. This is just after the coconut attack by Piper so this is a really hot feud. Piper bails to the floor to start (popular move tonight) before coming back in for a hot slugout. Snuka easily chops him down and adds a headbutt for good measure. Piper tries a headbutt of his own and looks like he has a concussion. Roddy goes to the eye instead and pounds away at the head but Jimmy comes back with a chop to send Piper to the floor.

As they come back in, Snuka gets Piper caught up in the ropes and pounds away before hooking a sleeper. Piper gyrates his way out to the floor again and finally breaks the hold. Jimmy rams him into the post and into a chair for good measure to bust Piper open. They head back inside and Roddy looks TERRIFIED. Another headbutt puts Piper down but he counters the top rope cross body and sends Jimmy into the ropes. Snuka falls to the floor and is counted out in record time.

Rating: C+. This was BY FAR the best match of the night so far as it felt like these two wanted to kill each other. Piper charging in to fight Jimmy was a good idea as he looked more crafty than cowardly, which is a nice thing to see given how lame heels are booked in modern wrestling. These two feuded for a long time, with the feud being incorporated into the main event of the first Wrestlemania.

Post match Piper drills him in the neck a few times with a chair, resulting in a Snuka stretcher job.

Terry Daniels vs. Fred Marzino

Daniels is a small guy who hung out with Sgt. Slaughter around this time. We cut to the back to see Snuka being looked at by the doctor. We cut back to the ring to see an armbar then go to the back again to see Snuka have a neck brace put on. Marzino has a headlock on but it’s back to Snuka. Jimmy is starting to respond a bit here but can’t move his right arm. We cut back to the ring to see Daniels win with a sunset flip and a VERY fast count. We only saw about 40 seconds of the match so no rating.

Jimmy is now getting oxygen. Alfred Hayes can’t get much info but it’s some kind of a concussion.

Intercontinental Title: Tito Santana vs. Greg Valentine

Tito is defending. Valentine tries to take it to the mat but Tito is too quick for him and it’s a standoff. Tito tries the same thing and it’s another standoff. Santana hooks a headlock into an atomic drop and Valentine begs off. A back elbow puts Tito down and there’s a shoulder breaker followed by a forearm to the face for two. Valentine pounds away but Tito comes back for a slugout to take over. We cut again to Jimmy being taken out on a stretcher.

Back in the ring and Valentine has Tito in a reverse chinlock but he counters into….something as we cut back to Snuka being wheeled out. Greg pounds away on the back and neck before getting two off a belly to back suplex. Valentine keeps on the ribs but Tito gets in a shot to the Hammer’s ribs to escape. Santana tries a leapfrog but takes out the referee instead. There’s the flying forearm for the pin on Valentine, but the referee misses the foot being on the rope.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but it was designed to set up another match later on which is fine. These two had some insane chemistry and with some more time and more of a focus on the match, they could have had a FAR better match. Either way, decent stuff here and a good way to get the fans to want to come back later. Tito would drop the title to Valentine a month later.

Post match Valentine puts Tito in the Figure Four and cranks on the knee something fierce.

Tito is in the back and says his knee is hurt. He sounds like he’s in labor. Tito says he’ll be back for Valentine and he’ll defend the title in 30 days.

Valentine is very pleased with himself and what he did to Taco Bell Santana.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh MAN this was lame. The Piper vs. Snuka match is good stuff but much like the main event, it was all to set up another match. The problem is the rest of the show was DREADFUL with the third best match of the show being Mike Sharp vs. Brian Blair. They were at least trying which helps a lot. Terrible show here which was desperately lacking Hogan.

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Superstars
Date: August 23, 2012
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California/Rabobank Arena, Bakersfield, California
Commentators: Scott Stanford, Matt Striker

This is another request and in something rather different, this is from less than a month ago. People ask me to do Superstars more often but you can only do so much of the same WWE stuff over and over again. Anyway this is seemingly a random episode of the show so maybe we’ll get some good action out of it which tends to be the case from this show. Let’s get to it.

For the sake of context, this is four days after Summerslam.

Damien Sandow vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Sandow does his usual schtick about before the match. Yoshi’s music is so catchy it’s unreal. Sandow takes over to start and drops a knee for two. Off to a chinlock but Yoshi quickly breaks it up and comes back with a chop. Sandow ties Yoshi up in the ring skirt and pounds away as Tatsu can’t get anything going here. The best he can get are a few rollups for two and some LOUD chops. A big kick puts Sandow down but the top rope spinwheel kick misses. The Russian legsweep sets up the windup elbow and the double arm neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: C-. Extended squash here but that’s what something like Superstars is good for. They don’t need to run through a match in two minutes or so and it gives them some more ring time. The problem with that is almost no one gets extended ring time so when they’re asked to do it, they don’t know what they’re doing and the matches usually don’t work.

We get a LONG recap of Lesnar vs. HHH from Summerslam as well as the fallout on Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Alex Riley

Drew has a bad hand here and milks it a bit before Riley grabs the wrist. A dropkick puts Drew on the floor but Riley misses a dive. Off to an armbar from McIntyre followed by some stomps to the leg. This is going really slowly. Drew tries the FutureShock but Riley sends him into the corner. Drew heads up but gets rolled up off the top for the pin for Riley out of nowhere.

Rating: D. Drew’s offense is really dull as he just stomped a bit after getting control due to Riley missing a dive. Riley is one of those guys that can’t get on TV for some reason and while I’ve heard various reasons, most of them seem stupid when you have a guy that could do some good for a company with basically no midcard to speak of at times.

Video on the Asian tour.

Video from the end of Raw with Cena confronting Punk before Punk beat up Lawler.

Justin Gabriel vs. Cody Rhodes

This is a rematch from a few weeks ago where Cody won. There’s actually a story here: Justin showed up with a chick and Cody hit on her, setting up the first match. See how easy that is? Both guys feel each other out to start and it turns into a contest of showing each other up. Gabriel gets a rollup for two which Cody takes offense to. They trade some HARD slaps and Gabriel takes Cody down and into a freaky arm trap hold.

Cody gets sent to the floor but he moves before Justin can dive. Unfortunately he moves into position for another dive from Gabriel as we take a break. Back with Gabriel hitting what looked like a dropkick for two. Gabriel goes to the apron but gets his arm snapped across the top rope to give Cody control. He bends Gabriel’s arm over the apron before hitting a gordbuster for two. Cody cranks on the arm a bit more and gets two off an uppercut.

Back to more work on the arm, this time in the form of a hammerlock. Justin starts a quick comeback but misses a top rope Lionsault to give Cody control again. Off to a short arm scissors but Gabriel gets off his back to break the hold. A monkey flip puts Cody down as does a spinning kick to the face. Justin hits a kind of sitout powerbomb for two but a slam is countered into the Cross Rhodes for the pin for Cody out of nowhere. Nice counter.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent match here with a sweet counter to end things. Gabriel is good in this kind of a role: the guy who isn’t going to win a major match anytime soon but he’s got enough speed and ability to keep things interesting. For a main event on Superstars, this was fine.

Overall Rating: C+. This is Superstars in a nutshell: you get some decent wrestling from guys you don’t usually see on WWE TV, but for the most part there’s a reason these guys aren’t on the big shows. They’re not bad at all but they don’t have anything that sets them apart from everyone else. Still though, you won’t regret watching it and if you’ve got roughly 45 minutes to kill and want to watch wrestling, there are far worse things you could pick.

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Clash of the Champions 35
Date: August 21, 1997
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes

Clash of the Champions more or less was WCW’s Saturday Night’s Main Event. They started it up to go head to head with Wrestlemania 4 and actually put a solid dent in it. The show went on for 9 years but by the end no one cared at all. The show was just worthless as there was already two hours of television a week so in essence we were just getting an extra Nitro two weeks a year, which is why this is the final one.

As for current storylines, this is at the height of the NWO’s power but Sting is looming. I think you know the story there. The main event is Luger and DDP vs. Savage and Hall. See what I mean about how this just isn’t that interesting of a show? Let’s get to it.

The opening video just runs down the card. Other than the stupid tag team main event this sounds pretty decent.

We get a clip of Dillon saying that Sting has until Thursday to make his demands as Sting had ripped up two contracts with match offers in them. Sting came through the crowd and got in the ring and the fans chanted Hogan. Sting pointed to the fans who were chanting it. This angle was freaking sweet too. And then Hogan and his ego just had to kill it dead.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael

Jarrett used to be a Horsemen and stole McMichael’s wife Debra so Mongo wants to get the title to get some revenge or something. This was the epitome of a feud that no one wanted to see but would never die. Mongo is a Horsemen here meaning we get to hear the sweetest theme music of all time. Jarrett was neither interesting nor good at this time whereas Mongo never was either of those things so we’ll give it to…dang who do we give this one to?

Actually let’s just hope this ends fast. We take a break and come back with Jarrett throwing Mongo into the steps (His name was Steve Mongo McMichael in case you were wondering). Debra chokes him and I still couldn’t care less. The WCW midcard just completely sucked and while we were having Owen vs. Austin followed by Rock vs. Austin in WWF at this point for the IC belt, this just doesn’t hold up. Jarrett puts on a sleeper as a great visual representation for this match.

Mongo gets his own and Debra gets up on the apron. For no apparent reason Eddie Guerrero runs out with a belt and goes up top but hits Jarrett by mistake. Mongo covers for the title with ease. Debra tries to get him back and fails at it.

Rating: D+. At least it was short. These two feuded forever and no one cared ever. It just wasn’t interesting at all but they thought they could just slap the Horsemen name on it and get a good reaction from it through the south. There wasn’t much here though so the time was good if nothing else. Mongo held it for less than a month before Hennig turned heel and took it.

Alex Wright comes out and speaks in English and Gene warns him to speak in English which was very stupid. It’s as simple of a promo as you could ask for. He has Ultimo Dragon tonight.

Gene is with the guys from a show called Dinner and a Movie. In essence they showed a movie and made food with a play on words of the movie title. It was an ok idea but why are these guys on a wrestling show? There’s your problem with WCW right there: too much corporate interference.

Stevie Richards vs. Raven

Raven “didn’t have a contract” at this point and insisted on wrestling only in No DQ matches. This is a grudge match or something as Richards was tired of Raven pushing him around. Richards had allegedly had a career ending neck injury but miraculously healed and showed up in WCW a few weeks later. They point out Raven’s ankle issue as he has a thing on his shoe to balance out the fact that his right leg is shorter than his left.

The Raven drop toehold hits to the chair as this is just a squash match so far. He throws in a bulldog onto the chair for good measure. Richards comes back with some decent stuff but at the end of the day he remembers he’s Steven Richards and the other guy is Raven and the best DDT other than Jake Roberts (who trained Raven) ends it.

Rating: C+. It was a squash and a quick one at that so we’ll just call it a bit above average for the DDT, which is the coolest move in history. Richards would be gone in like two weeks or so.

We get a cool video about Ultimo Dragon, explaining a bit of his history and his name. WCW hit the ball so far out of the park with this division that it’s insane. The name was called Ultimate Dragon but that was incorrect, as it was supposed to be Ultimo Dragon: Final Dragon, as in the final student of Bruce Lee, who he emulated in the ring. That’s the kind of thing that you just never get in WWE and it’s why the cruiserweights worked so well.

That and they never took them seriously. The shot of the J-Crown (8 titles from around the world which were defended on WCW television and included a WWF light heavyweight title that was active for 20 years but only in Japan, meaning that a WWF Title was defended on WCW television multiple times in 1996 and 1997) titles being piled up is just awesome.

TV Title: Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright

When Dragon won the title a few weeks prior, it was the match where no one talked about the match whatsoever other than the final three count as the whole match was nothing but talking about the NWO. At the end they more or less said hey we have a new champion! Now back to what we were talking about. It was just ridiculous how that was all they talked about.

Wright was a guy that they tried so hard to push but it just never played out like they wanted it to. He was this young hotshot that was somewhat over as a face so of course they turned him heel and no one cared after that. Dragon really was underrated in the ring. In WWE they just threw him into the cruiserweight division and let him die off because that division sucked so hard it was pathetic. These two feuded for the better part of a year and I don’t think anyone ever cared.

There was no focus at all on the title or anything as it was always about the NWO. Dragon gets the Asai moonsault that he invented and does better than anyone else. The commentary is all about them as well which is NICE. We hit a very nice ending sequence as they fight over pins but Wright hits a SWEET German suplex for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match but pretty boring at times. The problem was that while these two had good matches, it’s Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright. There’s just no heat at all and it’s not a great matchup while being a good match if that makes sense.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Jericho

Eddie is challenging here and is freshly full heel. Eddie’s cowardly heel stuff of running on his knees always made me chuckle. How much commentary do you really need on a Guerrero vs. Jericho cruiserweight match? The Canadian goes for that running springboard dropkick to the guy on the apron that he uses a lot but slips and botches it badly.

I guess once a year is understandable. In a quick ending, they hit another fast series of pinfalls but Jericho actually keeps Eddie down and gets the pin. Eddie jumps him after the match.

Rating: C-. WAY too short here but we just had to have Mongo and Jarrett earlier instead of on Nitro right? The ending sequence was fun as always and these two just flowed together pretty well. They needed more time though and that’s why the grade is low.

Silver King/Villano 4/Villano 5/Psicosis vs. Super Calo/Juventud Guerrera/Hector Garza/Lismark Jr.

More or less the idea here is go out there and do a bunch of flips like you do every night without ever getting pushed more than a tiny bit against each other. This is Lucha rules, meaning if someone goes to the floor then they don’t have to make a tag for someone else to come in. I used to hate Mike Tenay but he’s worth his weight in gold here.

There’s no real point to saying who is in as they move in and out so fast that it’s hard to keep up with them. We hit the big pile on with everyone hitting their big over the top rope until Psicosis hits the guillotine legdrop off the top onto Super Calo for the pin.

Rating: B-. It was just over the top and ridiculous which is what these guys did best. This was very fun and it worked well as it always did. These guys were well paid to go out there and just get the crowd going and that’s what they always did.

The cooking guys join the NWO. Tonight is their one year anniversary but Hogan isn’t here tonight because he’s in Canada doing a Hollywood movie. That’s WCW for you. We go to a commercial and come back to DDP Diamond Cutting one of the movie guys.

Konnan/Syxx vs. Ric Flair/Curt Hennig

Hennig was kind of an associate Horseman at the time but soon he would join the NWO and injure Flair. If there was ever a guy tailor made to be in the Horsemen, it’s Hennig. Syxx (X-Pac) more or less beats up Flair but we’ll ignore the pop he’s getting for doing it. That doesn’t exist. Flair gets his knee knocked out as Hennig hits the Fisherman’s Suplex on Konnan to get the win. This was a five minute train wreck.

Rating: C-. This was just insane and it felt like it was about two minutes long instead of the five that it actually was. Hennig denies being a Horsemen but also denies not being a Horsemen while only saying one thing. He actually does this which is impressive.

He would go heel soon enough in another dumb move because he was perfect for the Horsemen. He had the look, he could talk, he was over, he had the attitude and he was great in the ring. Naturally he was thrown into the NWO and forgotten about.

WCW Tag Titles: Lex Luger/DDP vs. Randy Savage/Scott Hall

About ten guys come out for the NWO and they have their party for it being their birthday. Apparently Nash is letting Savage defend his half of the tag titles for no apparent reason. Yeah of course we just throw two guys together that have never teamed together before (according to the ring announcer) and give them a tag title shot.

In WWF they would have won the titles. People keep popping the balloons that the NWO dropped so it sounds like people keep shooting guns or something and it’s really annoying. And for no apparent reason everyone other than Nash leaves. It’s exactly what you would expect from a match where the titles simply weren’t going to change hands.

The faces dominate early on but then the heels take over to set up the hot tag. Luger gets Hall in the rack but takes an accidental Diamond Cutter and gets pinned. What else is there to say here?

Rating: C+. It’s ok and that’s about it. What more do you want here? They had an ok match that no one cared about on a show that not a lot of people actually watched. Are you looking for something huge here?

We come back and Bischoff talks forever and then the lights begin to flicker. They go off and we see Sting in the rafters with a vulture. The famous speech in a child’s voice follows and the lights go out again and the bird is on the top rope. The NWO is terrified and Nash pulls the belt back to swing it at him as we go off the air. Think about how stupid this was for the live audience for a minute.

Overall Rating: C-. You could see that this was about the name of the show and nothing more. Yeah there were four title matches but that happened at almost every Nitro. Yes two titles changed hands but who cares? It’s just not an interesting show as Nitro was lighting the world on fire on Mondays on a weekly basis. Ten years earlier this was an awesome idea but here it just didn’t hold up at all. Not bad, but only watch if you like this time in WCW. Otherwise it’s nothing of note at all.

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Monday Nitro #49
Date: August 19, 1996
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Attendance: 5,850
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan, Eric Bischoff, Tony Schiavone

We’re a week away from #4 being revealed in the NWO. We’re also closing in on Fall Brawl and the beginning of the biggest and most lucrative storyline that WCW ever came up with. The time getting there is a bit slow but it’ll pick up in a hurry. The main event here is Giant vs. Savage which isn’t for the title anymore. Other than that there isn’t much here but it doesn’t look bad. Let’s get to it.

Jim Duggan vs. VK Wallstreet

This is a rematch from the Clash. Why we would want to see it again is beyond me but I doubt they’ve thought it that far through. Duggan tried for the tape but got rolled up for the upset (I guess) pin. They go to the floor almost immediately and Duggan takes over in the brawling environment. Back in for an atomic drop and now it’s back over again. Time to talk about the NWO! Ok to be fair I’d rather talk about that than this match.

Larry brings up the possibility that those guys might not be trustworthy and Tony says he thinks there’s one person more trustworthy than anyone else. I’ll leave the identity of this person a secret because he would join the NWO in two weeks. Off to a chinlock by Wallstreet as Tony talks about how intelligent Duggan is. Larry: “Are you ribbing me?” I’m with Larry Z here.

More chinlockery ensues as we hear about Duggan’s track record. That would include beating Steve Austin clean in 45 seconds for you non-history geeks. They collide and I’d bet on Duggan’s comeback starting now. Yep his head becomes impossible to hurt now and Duggan pounds away. There’s the tape and it’s declared foreign. But Duggan would never use something foreign! The referee takes it away from him so Duggan pulls out some more and the referee says it’s totally cool when it goes upside Wallstreet’s head for the pin.

Rating: D. I really am wondering why this match was taking place. I get that it’s a rematch but why did the original one take place at all? I mean, was there some clamor for these two to have a two match feud? The match was garbage too with Wallstreet being about five years past being interesting in the ring. Also the Vince parody (VK. Get it?) was only funny if you were really inside things and most fans weren’t, making it, say it with me, POINTLESS.

Duggan goes serious and talks to “Terry”, saying he turned his back on everyone. Here comes Savage for some reason. He says he’s going to beat up Hogan and now it’s a Savage interview. We look at some video of Hogan beating Savage with a chair last week. As for Giant, he’s got a problem with him which I think is they’re fighting. Can’t say Savage is looking ahead to Hogan entirely.

We talk about Giant being unstoppable lately and get some clips of him mauling Benoit in like 8 seconds at the last Clash.

Chris Benoit vs. Bobby Eaton

Eaton is a hometown boy but he’s in the Blue Blood period here. He’s on his own though as the Blue Bloods are having issues. As Benoit is making his entrance, this old lady has the biggest grin on her face and gives him two thumbs down. That’s awesome. This should be good as Eaton is a fine technical guy. Benoit beats him down and grabs a brief abdominal stretch.

Eaton takes it to the mat and can keep up with Chris out there for a bit. Benoit isn’t playing tonight though (when is he ever?) and sends Eaton into the post and hip tosses him on the floor. Back in and Eaton tags him with a right. We talk about WarGames which is a big deal every year. Benoit chokes away and Eaton does the same. I’m not used to him brawling like this. A swinging neckbreaker puts Benoit down but the Alabama Jam misses. Swan Dive and we’re done.

Rating: C+. Pretty good match here and Benoit gets to look dominant. This is what Eaton or guys like him are good at: making young guys look good. Jobbers to the stars are missing so badly anymore as they’re so rapidly rotated and then new ones have to be pushed to give them some credibility and it takes forever to get one into that role.

We get some clips from the triangle tag match last Thursday where the Outsiders interfered and we got a DQ in a triple threat thanks to Nick Patrick. We also see the main event where Hogan might have said he gave up but he took out the referee before it could be recorded and the match was thrown out.

Sting/Luger talk about their match with Flair/Anderson later which wouldn’t happen. They have a plan tonight and a possible surprise. Sting can’t stand either of them and promises a surprise also but doesn’t say what it is.

Disco Inferno vs. Scott Norton

Disco fires away and turns his back on Norton and I think you know where this goes. Disco tries to run but Norton, just like any villain, walks really slowly and manages to catch him. How does that work anyway? We’ve been at this for about two minutes now and Norton has barely done anything. Disco goes for the eyes which works for about a second. Shoulderbreaker and a Fujiwara Armbar end this.

Rating: C. It’s a squash so I’ll call it right in the middle. Norton looked awesome but would be in the NWO before a few months passed. This was supposed to set up more Norton vs. Ice Train which was a feud that went on too long. I don’t know if it ever got a rematch from Hog Wild and I really don’t care to. Hog Wild’s match wasn’t horrible though.

Teddy Long talks for Ice Train and accuses Patrick of costing Train the match. We get a clip of Norton beating up Ice Train. Oh my goodness Ice Train cannot talk. I mean he REALLY can’t talk.

Dean Malenko vs. Steven Regal

This should be good. We go to the mat immediately which is usually good for Dean but here he’s actually outmatched. We take a break and come back with the guys again exchanging nice moves with no one getting a solid advantage. Regal cartwheels away and takes Malenko down with a shot to the head for two. Off to a modified chinlock which only lasts for a few seconds.

Malenko gets a hip toss for two. A hip toss? Really? European Uppercut gets two for Regal. Now we talk about Patrick being corrupt which Larry dismisses as paranoia. Regal grabs a full nelson as Larry offers some actual analysis. Why can’t more veterans do that? Dean goes aerial and hits a springboard dropkick to the back of the head and the American hits a German to the Englishman and there’s a second for two. Regal grabs a butterfly suplex for two. He can’t pin Malenko and it’s making him mad. After a very nice back and forth pinning reversal sequence Malenko grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B. If you want fast paced technical stuff, this was the match you should have gone after. Good stuff here from two masters on the mat with a great ending sequence. They only rested when they had gone a good pace before it so I can more than live with that. It’s a rare instance where I wanted to see what happened during the break. Good match as expected with good talent in the ring.

The Horsemen rant and rave about how awesome they are and how great the Horsemen life is.

Hour #2 begins.

Nasty Boys vs. Public Enemy

Eric talks about how there’s a lawsuit from the WWF. A total of no one cares but hey, it’s real so that means everyone wants to hear it in Bischoff’s mind. The same old woman from the Benoit match boos the Public Enemy. It’s a brawl to start and probably will be for most of the match. We go split screen quickly and Bobby points out this isn’t really a tag match. Knobbs drops an elbow on Grunge for two. Grunge misses one of his own off the apron. There’s nothing to talk about here as it’s been a big brawl the entire time. A table is set up but Sags moves, putting both Enemies through it. The pin on Rock is academic.

Rating: C+. As a match it was awful. As a total brawl, which was the point of this, it was pretty decent. The ending was a big spot for the time and it looked good at the same time. The tables then were a bit thicker so it sounded a lot better. The Public Enemy would get the tag titles for like two weeks later in the year.

The Nasties are neutral in the NWO vs. WCW war and just want the tag titles.

We get another clip from the Clash with Eddie beating DDP for the Battlebowl Ring but Page pulled him into a pair of Diamond Cutters. Chavo came out for the save on his uncle which failed, resulting in a middle rope Diamond Cutter on Eddie.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Chavo is only known as Eddie’s nephew here and doesn’t have much of a resume of his own. He sends Page to the floor and hits a huge dive to open us up. Page is sent into the corner a few times but Chavo misses a charge, hitting the post shoulder first. He hit the buckle on the way in so the impact was slowed down. Page uses his size which is often forgotten about. He’s 6’5 or 6’6 so it really is an advantage.

We talk about Savage vs. Giant which is happening because Savage blames Giant for losing the title. WHEN DID HE SAY THAT??? This is the kind of thing we need to be told by Savage, not Bischoff. Page is dominating here and hits that sweet gutwrench powerbomb but lets it up at two. Spinning Rock Bottom gets two as Page lets him up again. Out of NOWHERE Chavo grabs a backslide for the quick pin.

Rating: C+. Chavo was a lot better when he was young and he got to show off a bit here. Page was getting better every day at this point and looked good here. The push was coming soon and it was clear at this point that he was earning it. The Page vs. Guerreros feud would culminate at the end of the year but it was fun getting there.

Page knocks Chavo loopy with a Diamond Cutter and steals Patrick’s belt to whip Chavo. Patrick doesn’t do anything until Randy Anderson comes out and takes it from Page. In the aisle Patrick blames Gene for the issues around him. Gene implies that Patrick bought a house he can’t afford.

We flash back a year ago with the American Males winning the tag titles in a shocker over Harlem Heat. Eric says this is the rematch. I guess the Males losing the belts back a few days later didn’t count?

Tag Titles: Harlem Heat vs. American Males

The Males (the team, not the gender even though that could apply to either team) get jumped to start and the champs have the early advantage. Both of the Males (Bagwell and Riggs) are beaten down quickly as I’m not expecting much competition in this one. Ray hits a suplex on Riggs and it’s off to Booker. Riggs fires off a dropkick to give himself a breather and down goes Booker.

There’s a double tag and Bagwell kicks Booker in the head as he jumps in. That looked good. He escapes a pumphandle slam into a cover but Booker saves. A rollup gets two and they go outside to brawl. Riggs hits a dropkick for two and Bagwell goes up. Booker shoves him off into a powerslam by Ray though and that’s good for three.

Rating: C+. Another fast paced match here with Eric losing his mind over this for some reason. I think it’s probably a stretch for the eleven month rematch idea but they needed something I guess to keep the match from being a squash so this was a pretty good idea if they had to go with this match. Much better than I expected here.

Arn Anderson/Ric Flair vs. Sting/Lex Luger

Sting has a mic immediately and wants to have the other Horsemen come into the ring. Mongo and Benoit come out and we take a break. So is Sting just going to wait around for five minutes? Gene comes out sans jacket and Sting’s surprise from earlier is he wants Anderson and Flair to join him and Luger against the NWO in WarGames. That takes a few minutes to ask. Arn warns Luger and Sting that this is something serious and that jiggling pecs have nothing to do with WarGames. Weren’t they on the same WarGames team at one point?

The match isn’t happening as we’re going to talk a little while longer. You can’t argue that this is a big move though. Everyone talks to everyone and it really is getting close to an awesome moment. Flair says it’s up to Mongo and Benoit. If they’re cool with it, Flair is cool with it. Benoit says he’ll stand behind Anderson and Flair’s decision. Nice touch there for the young Horsemen to stand behind the veterans. Mongo (loudly booed) says he’s willing to sacrifice but if Sting and Luger screw over the Horsemen, he’ll be coming for them. The deal is made. This really was a cool moment.

The NWO talk about being in “Italy” and film themselves filming each other. Nash: “Why is the Denver Post in Italy?” Funny stuff.

The Giant vs. Randy Savage

Savage jumps Giant in the aisle with a chair. Giant easily beats him down on the floor and Team WCW vs. Team NWO is official for Fall Brawl. After Giant throws him over the top rope the bell actually rings. Savage escapes the chokeslam and grabs the chair but has to fight off the invading Dungeon of Doom as this match is thrown out. Savage runs from the numbers but Giant jumps over the top to the floor. Giant is Big Show. Imagine Big Show jumping over the top rope to the floor.

Overall Rating: A-. I can’t believe what I’m saying but this was a very good and borderline excellent show. Everybody had energy, there was a point to almost everything, we got a big moment in the Horsemen teaming with Sting/Luger, the matches were good and there were some cool spots. THIS is what made Nitro look so much better than Raw: everything was fast paced and exciting and the wrestling got better and better, especially when they got some of their new faces in there like Jericho and Raven. Very good show and one of the best ever of the first 50.

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Clash of the Champions 33
Date: August 15, 1996
Location: Denver Coliseum, Denver, Colorado
Attendance: 8,304
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re at one of the final editions of this show and it’s probably a good thing. This is right after Hogan won the world title as a member of the NWO and tonight it’s his first defense which is against Flair. This isn’t a terrible looking card on paper and I vaguely remember watching it when it aired. I’m on a WCW 96 kick for some reason so this isn’t completely off from what I just got done with. Let’s get to it.

We get a series of clips of Hogan destroying various people as head of the NWO, saying if he’d do things to Savage like he did then what would he do to Flair who he can’t stand? Good question.

Tony and Bobby talk for a bit and we get a video from Nitro with the Outsiders vs. Sting/Luger. The Horsemen came out for a save when Luger was down. This was around the time when Nick Patrick was about to join the NWO but he hadn’t quite done it yet. This was part of attempt #1 to get WCW united out of about 8375, none of which worked.

Crusierweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio had won the title on Nitro the night after Hogan turned and this is a rematch. Tenay shows up for this one. Rey is AWESOME at this point given that his knees are still in their original form here and he’s about 40 pounds lighter before steroids happened. Yeah young fans, the Rey you see today is a giant compared to what he debuted as.

Dean jumps him before the bell and the beating is on. He’s relatively heel here but only as heel as he could get. Rey speeds things up, flying all over the place for a bit to tick Dean off. He speeds up again and takes over with ease. The move that would become known as the 619 is still a taunt here and Rey tries to get at Dean’s mind with it.

Dean slows things down and hits a slick move by setting for a powerbomb and dropping back into a hot shot. JUMPING brainbuster should kill Rey but it only gets two. Cool move by Rey as he gets a running start, grabs Dean and rolls backwards into a Fisherman’s suplex for two. Chinlock goes on by Dean to slow things down. We take a break and Tony says if anything happens we’ll show you. No replay is shown so did they just stand there? Was it a game of freeze tag?

Rey gets a running start and gets LAUNCHED into the air but lands on the middle rope. After catching his balance for a second he backflips off, starting an insane pinfall reversal sequence. That’s reminiscent of one of my all time favorite spots. Shortly after Rey debuted in WWE he was facing Noble on Smackdown.

Jamie threw him over his head (more or less throwing Rey into a leap frog) and Rey landed on the middle rope, didn’t stop for a second and bounced backwards, catching Noble in a rana into a pin. Noble totally telegraphed it but who cared man. That was insane and my jaw hit the floor when I saw that, which does not happen with me. We start talking about Nick Patrick and how he’s apparently become white. And black. That joke didn’t work as well as I wanted it to.

Dean with a leg lock that gets him nowhere. Oddly enough Dean is winning with power here. Rey sends him to the floor and gets a HUGE tope con hilo into a senton. He more or less botches the heck out of a Lionsault off the guardrail but to be fair the big spot just before that makes up for it. Springboard version of the West Coast Pop (doesn’t have that name here) gets two. Now we’re talking about the tag titles for no apparent reason at all.

One of Dean’s signature moves is a gutbuster out of a fireman’s carry off the middle rope. The problem here is that Rey weighs 130lbs soaking wet with a brick in his pocket, so when Dean elevates him for it he loses his grip on Mysterio so there is NOTHING to protect Rey as his ribs hit Dean’s knee. That looked incredible. He covers Rey who gets his foot on the rope. The referee counts three anyway but then waves it off. Rey uses the distraction to get the pin on a victory roll.

Rating: B+. This was AWESOME. You had Dean LAUNCHING Rey all over the place, making it look like Rey was flying. The big dives from Rey were top notch and that gutbuster looked incredible. Dean’s timing on that was great too as he had to move his knee into position to have Rey land on it. Great match here and very fun. Unfortunately we have to watch the other 78 minutes of this show.

Glacier is still coming. Holy sweet merciful crap that was one of the biggest bombs of all time. His entrance alone cost over half a million dollars and we had to deal with six months, yes I said MONTHS of vignettes hyping him up.

V.K. Wallstreet vs. Jim Duggan

Get it? VKM, obsessed with money, wears a suit a lot? Yeah it was crap. It’s Mike Rotunda, aka IRS. What does the R stand for anyway? There are fans with an NWO banner and Heenan isn’t sure what to think of that. These two are feuding apparently. Duggan gets a wristlock but Wallstreet gets the ropes. He looks at the camera and says he’s too smart for Duggan who is right behind him. Nice one dude.

Naturally we’re talking about Hogan vs. Flair almost nonstop here. After some basic back and forth stuff we hit the chinlock. Jawbreaker gets Duggan out of trouble. This is incredibly dull. Duggan gets a slam and tries to tape up his fist which was a thing he was doing at the time so the referee tries to stop him. In the ensuing chaos Wallstreet rolls him up for the pin. What the heck ever man.

Rating: F+. Just boring beyond belief here with nothing special going on whatsoever. This was one of those feuds that happened and I don’t think anyone actually remembers it. GrantedI don’t think anyone remembered it as it was happening either. Either way, this was dull beyond belief and a waste of 5 minutes counting introductions.

The Nasty Boys say they’re going to fight. They’ve been having issues with the NWO who they would soon try to join or maybe they already did. Knobbs says they want the gold. Oh and they should be in the triangle match for the titles.

After a break we’re with Gene again who says that earlier he and Tenay were interrupted by the Outsiders and wound up interviewing them. Want to know what was said? CALL THE HOTLINE!!! Oh dear.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Konnan

Naturally they call him Ultimate here because they’re stupid. Thankfully Tony and Mike say the right name but his graphic says Ultimate. Konnan is in regular trunks here which is weird to see. Nick Patrick is the referee here so I’d bet on a lot of the focus being on him because a referee is more important than the wrestlers.

Konnan dominates to start, taking Dragon to the mat and getting an insane looking deathlock/Cloverleaf on him. Dragon’s arms were between his legs and it looked painful very painful. He hits the floor and we hear about how Konnan is all bitter over losing his US Title, which would lead to his heel turn. HEY! That’s a great way to start talking about Hogan!

Dragon sends him to the floor and Sonny lays in some decent kicks of his own. Somehow the referee has no issue with this at all either. Dragon takes over and gets a moonsault and a majistrol cradle for two. Konnan rolls through a German Suplex and uses the tights to get the very fast win. Under three minutes so no rating but this wasn’t anything special at all.

There’s a really old school internet chat going on and Ice Train is there. It’s on Compuserve of all things. Scott Norton, his old partner, jumps him there.

Meng vs. Randy Savage

This should be dull. Savage is badly injured here. Actually scratch the here part as there’s no Savage. That rock version of Pomp and Circumstance is pretty awesome to listen to though. Not so good to put on toast. Savage is too injured to wrestle so it’s a forfeit. Fans are not happy to say the least.

The Dungeon of Doom comes out to talk. Sullivan talks about how he’s never been a fan of Hogan and never praised him. He’s always told it how it is about Hogan and wants an explanation from Gene about him supporting the entire time. Jimmy cuts him off to say how great the Dungeon is…and a Leprechaun is here. No one talks about him but the camera shows him running all over the place. Apparently that’s Dwayne Bruce, the guy that ran the Power Plant and trained Goldberg. Yeah that’s it.

Bull Nakano vs. Madusa

These two had some great matches in Japan so this should be good. Madusa starts off very fast but can’t get much going. Nakano grabs her by the hair and spins her around the ring by it. That has to freaking hurt so she does it again! Nakano hits her with knunchuks twice and the referee is all cool with it apparently. Madusa totally botches a cross body, hitting Nakano in the feet. Top rope double axe handle to the floor kills Sonny (manager) who then kicks Nakano by mistake for the pin. This was very short but sloppy beyond belief. Terrible match indeed.

Flair and the girls say tonight it’s Flair vs. Hogan with Flair talking about how this is about being the best. He has zero chance to win the title but at least he’s acting intense. Flair says he has the Horsemen backing him up. Liz is so much hotter in the leather jacket and regular shirt than the dresses it’s unreal.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is for the Battlebowl Ring which is apparently a defendable title. Page is on the brink of the push of a lifetime as he would become the first guy to turn down the NWO and become the hottest face in the company for about a year. He has the look down here too. Eddie starts off fast of course but Page takes him down early. Guerrero’s shoulder hits the post so Page stomps on his ribs. He was still learning here.

Page gets a nice spinout gutbuster for two. Heenan still complains about the lack of arm work. DDP has an earring in his ear and Heenan suggests that Eddie rips it out. Brain could be a bit evil at times. They slug it out and Eddie pounds away, winning that aspect of the match. Batista Bomb gets two for Page. Page sets him for a top rope suplex but Eddie knocks him off and gets the Frog Splash for the win and the ring. Diamond Cutter post match and Page keeps the ring. More Diamond Cutters hit and Chavo tries to save which fails as well.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here but it wasn’t bad. These two feuded forever with the idea being to get Page much better as a result. It kind of worked but the people were tired of the feud once it was over. Anyway, they would meet again for the US Title at Starrcade and then Page would turn and everything would get awesome.

Hogan pops up to yell at Gene. He talks about how there can only be one great one and starting tonight…nothing apparently. This is rather pointless indeed.

Glacier is STILL coming. Exact same ad from earlier.

Chris Benoit vs. The Giant

Ok this has to be good right? It’s Benoit. Woman is helping Benoit out of his vest so Giant DROPKICKS him in the corner. Keep in mind that the Giant is more commonly known as Big Show. He’s still lean here and one of the most amazing athletes you’ll ever seen. This is the Giant that could have destroyed Andre, not the big oaf you see today. Giant immediately grabs him and gets the BIGGEST CHOKESLAM EVER, with every bit of Benoit above the post for the easy pin in 30 seconds if you stretch it out. Ok then.

Tag Titles: Sting/Lex Luger vs. Steiner Brothers vs. Harlem Heat

Heat are the champions here. This is a triangle match which has some different rules depending on what year it is. This time it’s one fall to a finish and you have to tag in and out. Sometimes it would be elimination, some times it would be three guys in the ring at once, sometimes it would be like this. You never could tell for sure. Ok, please give us something watchable here. I beg of you.

Scotty and Booker start us off. Luger drills Booker with a clothesline to take him to the floor and he’s shaken up. Scott, like an idiot, tags in Luger. If his team isn’t in the match, they can’t win the titles. Well he does have to dumb himself down so maybe that has something to do with it. Stevie in now and they take turns slugging each other down in the corner.

Rick tags himself in and kills Stevie with a Steiner Line. Top rope bulldog gets two as Luger breaks it up. We take a break and are back with Booker and Rick but Sting tags himself in to beat on Booker. There’s an interesting matchup. They alter the top rope rule again so Sting isn’t disqualified. Off to Luger now as the superstars are in control. We get into the psychology part here as everyone keeps breaking things up.

Scott REACHES to get a tag to bring himself in to beat on Sting. Sting has on purple and yellow. Must be an alliance with Cena. Back to Luger as this is getting more like a brawl by the second. Rick gets a nice reverse German suplex as we hear about how the air this high off the ground could be a factor. That’s rather true actually. Luger gets a fireman’s carry which is called the Rack for no apparent reason.

Everything breaks down and it’s Booker vs. Scott in the ring still. Everyone else is fighting in the aisle and here come the Outsiders! They beat the tar out of everyone else but the key thing here is that Nick Patrick does not see it. Scott gets the Frankensteiner but Patrick sees the Outsiders leaving and call that a DQ to throw the match out. Scott is right: that’s nonsense.

Rating: C. The match was starting to get good by the end but of course the referee is more of a focus than the freaking match so we’ll go with that instead. This isn’t much to talk about as far as the ending goes, but the rest of it was pretty good. It’s nothing I’ll remember in half an hour but it was ok while it lasted.

Gene talks to Patrick who says that it was a DQ. Gene says that it shouldn’t have been because it wasn’t in the ring. So freaking what? So if Nexus comes down and beats the heck out of Cena but doesn’t get in the ring it’s legal? Yeah this is rather stupid and Patrick is right here.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

Oh look it’s this match again. They talk about the 4th member of the NWO being around but no one knows who he is. It would be DiBiase which would actually save WWF in the long run as it freed up Austin. Fifth would be Giant. Both try to get in each other’s heads which only kind of works. Flair grabs a headlock as Tony tries to convince us that Flair is nervous. That’s very funny.

Hogan struts a bit as this is Larry Z levels of stalling. I love hearing Bobby go off about how he told us all so about Hogan for years. The match is two minutes old and we’ve had maybe 30 seconds of contact. Flair gets in chops and punches to take Hogan down to the floor and he’s very frustrated.

Out to the floor now with Hogan in control. They’re trying to make this out to be a huge match but it’s the same thing we’ve seen so many times before. That was an issue I always had with the NWO. Both guys had been in WCW maybe five years earlier and probably a lot less than that. Also it’s not like they were brand new as everyone knew who they were, but all of a sudden we’re supposed to be terrified of them?

Hogan works over Flair on the floor and mainly his back, but Flair gets him back into the ring and lands a suplex. Hogan, for perhaps the only time ever that I can remember as a true heel, Hulks Up complete with the basic offense. I’d love to have him do that more often I think. He was almost unbeatable with that so why not keep doing the same thing he’s done for years?

Legdrop misses and Flair goes for the leg. SHOCK AND AWE SHOCK AND AWE SHOCK AND AWE: HE GOT IT ON THE PROPER LEG!!! I have never seen him do that in his entire career! Flair gets the hold on the leg that Hogan just hurt and the champ is in trouble! After an attempt at a reversal, Hogan shoves the referee and cue NWO for the big beatdown. The Horsemen, Sting and Luger hit the ring for the save.

Rating: C-. This was your traditional Hogan match from this era: punch, punch, punch, scratch, punch, punch, leg drop. The Hulking Up thing was a nice add-on here though and while it’s not their worst match ever, these two never had that big epic awesome match that they were supposed to have. The matches tended to go downhill after a decent first WCW meeting.

Tony and Bobby wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D-. The lack of failure is only for the awesome opening match. Aside from that this is one of the weakest shows I can remember in a long time. They did nothing for the most part as everything ended in a DQ or was like three minutes long. Yes they had 9 matches, but when only one is good and two are ok and the other six are bad, what’s the benefit there? WCW was running on pure drama and hype at this point and it’s very clear here. Terrible show but at least it was relatively short.

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