Wrestlemania VI
Date: April 1, 1990
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 67,678
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
O Canada: Robert Goulet

We’ll look at one more Wrestlemania after this year’s season ends thanks to the WWE Vault. This is one of the most famous Wrestlemania main events of all time with The Ultimate Challenge as Hulk Hogan vs. the Ultimate Warrior, title for title. That’s about all you have on the show but…well what else do you need? Let’s get to it.

The opening video is one of the all time best, with Vince McMahon showing various constellations in space, eventually stopping on Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior, because this is ALL Wrestlemania was built around.

Robert Goulet sings O Canada.

Koko B. Ware vs. Rick Martel

The ring carts are back! Martel jumps him during the weapons check and hammers away but Ware is back with a middle rope crossbody. Some dropkicks have Martel in trouble and a backdrop makes it worse. Ware gets low bridged out to the floor and it’s a suplex for two back inside. The Boston crab is blocked (in the Coliseum Video, that was clipped to the finish, assuming you ignore Ware being nowhere near where he was for the submission when the hold was put on) and Ware fights up but the comeback is cut off as Ware misses a crossbody. Now the Boston crab can finish Ware off at 5:30.

Rating: C. Not much to see here but a Canadian heel gets to win so the fans won’t be overly annoyed. It’s still strange to see a cold match on Wrestlemania but there’s nothing wrong with what we got here. Ware is a perfectly serviceable star and Martel is still criminally underrated, so it’s not like this was going to be bad. Uneventful maybe, but not bad.

Gene Okerlund is with the Colossal Connection (Haku/Andre The Giant) but calls them the Colostomy Connection. This leads to a series of puns but the gist is they’ll beat Demolition.

Demolition is ready to chop down the Colossal Connection. Threats of shouting TIMBER are issued, while Smash would rather put the champs in the back of a truck and throw them off a cliff. Dude it’s a wrestling match. Stop threatening to murder them.

Tag Team Titles: Colossal Connection vs. Demolition

The Connection, with Bobby Heenan, is defending and don’t get an entrance. It’s almost like that’s just not a big deal and is a nice way to shave off a bit of time. The champs jumps them before the start and it’s Haku officially starting with Smash. They slug it out with Smash taking over and grabbing an early neck crank. Ax comes in for some shots of his own before it’s back to Smash for a battle over a backslide.

With that going nowhere, it’s back to Ax, who gets hit in the throat and caught in a backbreaker for two. Some chops have Ax in more trouble, to the point where he staggers over to Andre, who decks him as well. Haku strikes him down again and then sends him into Andre’s head, which is quite the smart move. Another comeback is cut off with a poke to the eyes and we go to a wide shot of the stadium and dang it looks awesome.

The nerve hold goes on to keep Ax in trouble but he fights up, only to get choked down by Andre again. Ax manages to fight up and gets in a knockdown, which is FINALLY enough for the tag off to Smash. Everything breaks down and Andre gets double teamed into the corner. Haku superkicks Andre by mistake though and he gets tied up in the ropes. A double clothesline and the Demolition Decapitator gives us new champions at 9:10. Andre never tagged in.

Rating: C+. This was a glorified handicap match, with Haku literally wrestling the entire match with Andre only coming in at the beginning and end. It was clear that Andre was at the end of his run but there was still something to be said about having a giant like that standing around. Demolition getting the titles back got a heck of a reaction too, as it was quite the moment.

Post match Andre is still staggered but Heenan LOSES HIS EVER LOVING MIND by yelling at Andre and slapping him in the face. Andre punches Heenan in the face, beats up Haku for daring to defending Heenan and then knocks both of them out of the ring cart (I’ve always loved that), allowing him to ride away to one final hero’s sendoff.

Jimmy Hart thinks there is going to be an earthquake in Toronto. I mean, there already is one next to him but I get the idea.

Hercules vs. Earthquake

Jimmy Hart is here with Earthquake. Hercules hammers away but can only knock Earthquake into the corner. A test of strength has Hercules down on his knees and Earthquake drops him again. Back up and some running shoulders and clotheslines stagger Earthquake but ever the moron, Hercules tries a torture rack. The ensuing collapse sets up an elbow into the Earthquake to finish Hercules at 4:56.

Rating: C. This was about all you could have expected from this match and it went completely ok. At the end of the day, there is only so much Hercules can do with a monster, especially with Hulk Hogan being up next for Earthquake. You don’t want to see Hercules throw him around and Earthquake looks all the more dominant. The key thing here was to keep it short, and it worked better as a result. Hercules would turn heel and form Power & Glory pretty soon.

Rona Barrett (celebrity interviewer) talks to Miss Elizabeth, who says she’ll be back around more frequently in the near future. Not really, no.

Brutus Beefcake looks at Mr. Perfect’s record and is impressed, but he’s ready to trim it down.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

The Genius is here with Perfect. They slug it out in the corner to start with Beefcake knocking him out to the floor. Perfect needs a breather before coming back in to hammer away and take over. Beefcake sends him into the corner and comes back with a slam, followed by another whip into the corner. Naturally Perfect does a big bump, because that’s just what he does. With nothing else working, Genius slips Perfect the scroll for a cheap shot to take over. The Hennig necksnap gets two and Perfect slaps him a few times but Beefcake catapults him into the post for the pin out of absolutely nowhere at 7:48.

Rating: C+. This was a good match for Beefcake, who gets the big feather in his cap by giving Perfect his first loss. Beefcake really was crazy over at this point and was getting better in the ring. Then his face was destroyed in a few months and he just never recovered, which is a shame when you can see what he was doing here.

Post match Beefcake goes after the Genius (Perfect doesn’t seem to notice and leaves), setting up the sleeper and a haircut. The thing is Genius apparently wasn’t told this was going to happen (as apparently Pat Patterson only told Beefcake about the idea) so his flailing around and trying to get away was legitimate. It almost led to a fight backstage between Beefcake and Randy Savage before things calmed down.

We recap Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown. They eliminated each other from the Royal Rumble and had a big fight to the back. Then Brown called it a skirt and of course it meant war.

Now we get to the reason why this match isn’t on Peacock, as Piper, in half Black face, calls himself Hot Rod and Hot Scot (complete with a bit of Billie Jean). Piper mocks Brown’s eyes, ears and nose (with the long hairs sticking out) before moving on to the biggest problem, which is Brown’s mouth. Piper is ready to shut it for Brown, but will it be Hot Rod or Hot Scot who does it? I have no idea how this was seen as a good idea but it’s as terrible as it sounds.

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

Brown doesn’t seem to understand what is up with the dual skin color thing and I’m not quite getting it either. They slug it out to start and the referee breaks it up, allowing Piper to hit a crossbody. Piper hammers away in the corner but gets staggered by a big headbutt. Some right hands put Piper down and we hit the nerve hold.

An elbow gives Brown two, with commentary getting on him about the lackadaisical cover. The turnbuckle pad is taken off but Piper sends him into it instead. It’s time to load up a glove and Piper knocks him down a few times, with the referee being fine with the whole thing. Brown bails to the floor and pulls Piper with him and it’s a double countout at 6:50.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t exactly good, but it’s remembered for reasons of WHAT WAS PIPER THINKING. I have no idea how this was approved and while I know things were a bit different back in 1990, it was just such a terrible idea. It doesn’t help that they didn’t have time to do anything, with the match wrapping up when it was just getting going. I mean, assuming the glove deal was something getting going.

The brawl continues and referees break it up as they go to the back.

Steve Allen (former Tonight Show host) is in a bathroom with a piano, where he can’t quite manage to play the Soviet national anthem. This is what we get for celebrities these days. And now did they get that piano in there?

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

The Bolsheviks do their singing and get jumped by the Harts to start fast. Volkoff is knocked to the floor and the Hart Attack finishes Zhukov at 19 seconds. Hart counting to three at the camera was a great touch. And now it’s time for the Harts to go after the Tag Team Titles.

Wrestlemania VII is coming to the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum. Well maybe if they can get tickets to a game on their way to the Sports Arena.

Tito Santana is ready for the Barbarian.

Tito Santana vs. The Barbarian

Bobby Heenan is here with Barbarian, who Santana can’t drop to start. Barbarian runs him over instead and tries a powerbomb, only for Santana to punch his way out. Barbarian’s middle rope elbow misses though and Santana comes back with the flying forearm. Heenan puts the foot on the ropes like a good manager should, allowing Barbarian to get in a throat snap across the top. The top rope clothesline absolutely destroys Santana (in an awesome sell) for the pin at 4:20.

Rating: C+. Santana was trying here and Barbarian was perfectly capable of having this kind of a match. Barbarian got in his power stuff and looked impressive, but that clothesline is all people remember from the match. That’s for good reason too, as Santana sold the thing like death.

We recap Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Randy Savage/Queen Sherri. It’s basically the men were feuding and the women got involved. Simple and to the point here.

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire are ready to prove that they are better than royalty and promise the Crown Jewel. Great. Now we’re going to Saudi Arabia.

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Randy Savage/Queen Sherri

Ventura has a big problem believing that Rhodes and Sapphire combine to weigh 465lbs, as Sapphire is at least 250. Rhodes and Sapphire do indeed have the Crown Jewel in the form of Miss Elizabeth, who comes to the ring as Savage loses his mind. The men start things off as commentary explains the rules, as this is a first time ever match in the WWF.

Sherri tries a cheap shot on Rhodes and gets pulled into the corner by Sapphire, leaving Ventura panicking over a camera shot from behind Sapphire. Rhodes pulls a diving Savage out of the air and it’s off to the women. Sapphire sends the villains into each other and airplane spins Sherri. Savage comes back in and gets his arms tied up, allowing Sapphire to get in a slap.

Back up and Savage sends him outside for a top rope ax handle, setting up Sherri for a knee to the gut. Sapphire comes over and gets thrown down, with Ventura being far too pleased. Back in and Savage hits a suplex, allowing Sherri to hit a top rope splash for two, already going against the rules of the match. Rhodes comes back in and elbows away at Savage before Sapphire comes back in to suplex Sherri. Elizabeth throws her back in and even gets in a shot to Sherri. Sapphire gets a rollup for the pin at 7:38.

Rating: C. They were very smart to keep Sapphire out of the ring save for a few fun spots and that’s the right way to go. At the end of the day, she wasn’t much of a wrestler but she wasn’t being presented as one so it’s not some big stretch. The match might not have been good, but it was certainly fun and that’s all you need at times.

Post match Savage tries a scepter shot but Rhodes takes it away. Savage manages to get his crown on as he runs off because he’s awesome that way. Dancing ensues.

Gene Okerlund asks Bobby Heenan where he has the “ba….the nerve” to hit Andre in the face. Heenan makes various threats and actually loses his train of thought, leaving him with a blank stare. Gene brings him back to reality and Heenan goes on a rant about starting a new Family (true actually). Ignore Heenan being all sweaty and disheveled due to the Andre thing, but looking perfectly fine for the Barbarian match in between them.

Rona Barrett suggests that Jesse Ventura has done an adult movie. Gorilla Monsoon is WAY too interested in this.

Randy Savage rants about mind games.

Demolition, who haven’t had a shower despite winning the titles an hour ago, are happy with their title win and they’re ready for the Hart Foundation.

Hulk Hogan says the power lies in his hand. Then when he gets Ultimate Warrior on his knees, he’ll ask if Warrior wants to live forever. The Hulkamaniacs can save him and bring him from the darkness into the light. Hogan says it doesn’t matter whether he wins or loses (there’s your red flag) because it’s about being a good winner or loser. Hopefully Warrior is a good loser.

Ultimate Warrior throws Sean Mooney out, saying he doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as Warrior and Hogan. Warrior then goes on some rant about how no one can live forever but he wants to merge the Little Warriors and the Hulkamaniacs. Then he wants to bring Hogan to a new place where he has never been before. Dubuque, Iowa?

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Mr. Fuji is here with the Express. Jannetty knocks Tanaka down to start but Tanaka hits a superkick (close enough). The Rockers clear the ring and hit stereo dives (a big spot for 1990), with Fuji not being pleased in the slightest. Back in and the Express stomps away in the corner before Tanaka gives Michaels a gutbuster.

A spinning forearm cuts Michaels off again before Sato grabs a quickly broken nerve hold. Michaels fights up and brings in Jannetty as everything breaks down. Fuji offers a distraction though and Sato gets in some salt to Jannetty’s eyes. Jannetty even stumbles over the barricade (sounds like a normal night for Marty) and it’s a countout at 7:43.

Rating: C+. This is a match that should have been awesome but it was just mostly ok. Allegedly the Rockers were VERY hung over for the match and that’s probably the reason for a lot of the issues. That being said, it’s still a good match and they would have a much better match the following year at the Royal Rumble (subbing in Kato for Saito helped).

Steve Allen introduces Rhythm & Blues. Allen: “They have been called one of the greatest bands to come along in quite a long time. Unfortunately they are not here tonight so here are Rhythm & Blues.” Allen suggests that the Honky Tonk Man is similar to Elvis. As in Costello. More jokes ensue, including Valentine saying they’re going to the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame. Allen: “I’ll call them and warn them you’re coming.” Yeah it’s corny but Allen is funny enough.

Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

Duggan is waving the American flag (which is wrapped up to the point where you can’t see the stars at first) and Ventura points out how dumb that might be in Canada. Bravo has Earthquake and Jimmy Hart with him so this isn’t likely to go well. Duggan slugs away to start and Bravo is knocked outside.

Back in and Duggan hits an atomic drop before slugging away in the corner. Bravo fights back and drops a big elbow before sending Duggan face first into the buckle. Since there’s nothing there to hurt, it fires Duggan up but Bravo kicks him down again. Duggan fights up and makes the comeback so Earthquake offers a distraction. The 2×4 shot to the back gives Duggan the pin at 4:38.

Rating: C-. Good example of “what else were you expecting”, even with Earthquake out there for the likely post match beatdown. Duggan is such a goofy fun star and that was always his thing. It was certainly on display here and the match wasn’t any good, but it’s almost impossible to boo Duggan. Even with his flag issues aside of course.

Post match Earthquake drops Duggan and gives him two Earthquakes.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Ted DiBiase, which is a long running feud over Roberts stealing DiBiase’s money and the belt. Now the belt is on the line.

Roberts talks about how there are people who could use DiBiase’s money but he mocks and humiliates them. Now it’s time for DiBiase to be mocked and humiliated, a victim of his own greed.

Million Dollar Title: Jake Roberts vs. Ted DiBiase

DiBiase is defending and has Virgil with him. They slug it out to start and Roberts tries an early DDT, sending DiBiase bailing out to the floor. They both miss elbows and DiBiase has to run from another pair of DDT attempts. Back in and Roberts works on a hammerlock, even managing to send DiBiase bailing out to the floor. DiBiase slowly gets back in and walks into a knee, only to avoid a running knee in the corner to leave Roberts down for a change.

The front facelock goes on as the fans do the Wave before they go outside, with Roberts getting posted. A piledriver gets a VERY delayed two, with even Ventura getting on DiBiase for taking so much time. The Million Dollar Dream goes on and Roberts finally falls into the ropes for the break.

DiBiase goes up but gets punched out of the air, allowing Roberts to start the comeback. Virgil offers a distraction though and Roberts goes outside to take care of him. The Million Dollar Dream goes on again outside, with Roberts sending him into the post. Virgil earns his pay though by sending DiBiase back inside to beat the count out 11:49.

Rating: C. For some reason, these two just could not have a good match if they tried. They’re a pair that should have made for solid matches up and down the circuit and it just never happened. That was the case again here, with the countout making things even worse than usual.

Post match DiBiase gets some money out so Roberts beats him up. Virgil bails with the belt but Roberts plants DiBiase with the DDT. Roberts gives away the money, including $100 to Mary Tyler Moore. Damien is loaded up but Virgil runs back in for a distraction and escapes.

Slick and Akeem (who can’t stop dancing) are ready for some revenge on the Big Boss Man.

The freshly turned Big Boss Man talks about how he isn’t going to take money from Ted DiBiase. He may be poor, but he’s proud.

Akeem vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man’s sneer as he rides the ring cart to the ring is borderline terrifying. Hold on though as Ted DiBiase is still at ringside and jumps the Boss Man on the floor. So the match officially begins with Akeem hitting a splash, with Gorilla and Ventura arguing over interference. Apparently this is TOTALLY DIFFERENT than Elizabeth interfering earlier. Akeem hammers away in the corner but Boss Man knocks him out of the corner and makes the comeback. Some whips into the corner have Akeem in trouble and a clothesline puts him down. Boss Man hammers away and hits the Boss Man Slam for the pin at 1:51.

Sean Mooney talks to various fans about Rhythm & Blues sing. One fan: “I DON’T CARE!” He also talks to Mary Tyler Moore, who clearly has no idea what is going on and doesn’t care. Mooney: “She’ll always be Mary Richards to me.”

We get a rare production gaffe as the bell rings before Rhythm & Blues come to the ring to play their new song live. They come out in a pink Cadillac, complete with a totally unknown Diamond Dallas Page driving (it was his car). Monsoon dubs the girls in the car the Honkettes and Jesse LOSES IT for some reason. Anyway, they do indeed play Hunka Hunka Hunka Honky Love…until the Bushwhackers come out and wreck everything. Honky Tonk Man felt so useless after losing the Intercontinental Title (which was kind of the point) but Valentine trying so hard with this completely out of nowhere gimmick change is still amusing.

The official attendance: 67,678. Not bad.

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Bobby Heenan is here with Rude and Steve Allen is on commentary. Rude jumps him from behind and starts the big forearms to the back, only to miss a dropkick (not his most common move). Snuka gets in a few shots to the ribs and mocks Rude, only for Rude to slug him right back down. A poke to the eye cuts Snuka off again but he comes back with a flying headbutt. Snuka’s middle rope headbutt misses though and the Rude Awakening is good for the pin at 3:49.

Rating: C. Yeah this is something that probably should have been cut due to time, but this was important enough for the future. Rude’s hair was slicked back here to get rid of his goofy looking style and he won clean in the end. It wasn’t a memorable match in any way, but what mattered here was Rude feeling like a more serious star and they made it work well enough.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. the Ultimate Warrior. They went face to face in the Royal Rumble and it was the most amazing thing ever, as it was hard to imagine the match actually happening. The match was set up, Hogan saved Warrior from Earthquake, Warrior saved Hogan from Earthquake, and they had a mini feud with Mr. Perfect and the Genius. None of that stuff mattered though, because Hogan vs. Warrior was going to happen.

WWF Title/Intercontinental Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior

Title for title so they’re both defending. Warrior gets to run to the ring and that’s not likely to go well. Hogan walks (being the only two to not use the ring carts) and that imagine of Warrior doing his pose on the buckle is one of the first wrestling imagines I can ever remember. You don’t get to say this and actually mean it very often, but this is the definition of a split crowd. Both of them are cheered and the fans are giving no sign that one is more popular than the other. They take their belts off and do the staredown and my goodness you can feel the intensity.

They shove each other and pose before going to the test of strength with even Jesse saying this is totally even. Warrior gets him down to his knees and that is a game changer (Ventura: “WHO WOULD HAVE EVER THOUGHT!”) as the idea of a good guy being able to do that to Hogan was unthinkable. Hogan powers up to set the universe right and Warrior goes down for one of your famous shots from the match. Warrior starts to get up so Hogan trips him down and drops a leg for two.

They do the criss cross until Hogan hits a slam, with Warrior popping back up to scare Hogan to death. Back up and Warrior hits his own slam, with a bit more effect. A clothesline puts Hogan on the floor and he comes up holding up his knee. Warrior is smart to kick at the knee but Hogan tells the referee he’s getting back in, where Hogan suddenly forgets about the knee (it’s never brought up again) to make the quick comeback.

Hogan drops some elbows and we hit the front facelock as Warrior is blown up and needs a breather. A small package sets up a chinlock before Hogan hits a clothesline for two. The chinlock goes on again as they are barely able to hide that Warrior is in trouble. Some knees to the back (Monsoon: “Cervical vertebrae!” Ventura: “No Monsoon, IT’S THE BACK!”) set up another chinlock as we’re firmly in the middle of the match, though the crowd is still right there with them.

Back up and they hit a double clothesline, with Ventura accurately saying that Hogan should be in control still because he had done so much more damage. Warrior starts to shake the ropes for the comeback as he now has some more oxygen, meaning it’s time to whip Hogan into various corners. A bearhug has Hogan in trouble and we get two arm drops. Hogan punches his way to freedom and Warrior accidentally runs the referee over.

Back to back top rope ax handles stagger Hogan but he avoids the flying should to spike Warrior into the mat. That’s good for no count so Hogan gets up, with Warrior belly to back suplexing him to even the match at a visual pinfall apiece. The referee gets back up (if this had been modern wrestling, there would have been a ridiculous heel turn or interference and it would have been awful) to count some very delayed twos.

Warrior gets sent outside and Hogan gets sent into the post. The gorilla press into the Warrior Splash gets two as it’s time to Hulk Up. The comeback is on and the big boot connects but the legdrop misses (GASP!). Warrior hits another quick splash for the pin and the title at 22:45, with Hogan kicking out at 3.01, because Warrior was just a hair better, but that’s all he needed to be.

Rating: A. This very well may be the greatest example of a match being elevated by the crowd. The match itself is good and a back and forth match which told a story, but the crowd turned it from a match to an event. Just watching these two go face to face felt special and it came off like the dawning of a new era. That era didn’t go so well, but the start of it was incredible. It’s not an all time classic wrestling match, but it’s professional wrestling at an incredibly high level and that is more than noteworthy.

Post match the referee gives Warrior the titles but we go tight on the Warrior so the referee can hand the WWF Title back to the Fink. That lets Hogan pick up the title and hand it over for the big hero moment. Hogan gets to leave and salutes Warrior as the pyro goes off and posing ensues. Even Ventura praises Hogan for the big sendoff in a moment you don’t often see.

Overall Rating: B. This show is really kind of astounding as it’s fondly remembered, but there is NOTHING on here but the main event. You have a few nice moments, but so many of the matches are completely forgettable if not downright skippable. They banked everything on Hogan vs. Warrior and luckily those two hit it so far out of the park that the ball wound up back in America. It’s a one match show, but my goodness what a match that is.

Results
Rick Martel b. Koko B. Ware – Boston crab
Demolition b. Colossal Connection – Demolition Decapitator to Haku
Earthquake b. Hercules – Earthquake
Brutus Beefcake b. Mr. Perfect – Slingshot into the post
Hart Foundation b. Bolsheviks – Hart Attack to Zhukov
The Barbarian b. Tito Santana – Top rope clothesline
Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire b. Randy Savage/Queen Sherri – Rollup to Sherri
Orient Express b. Rockers via countout
Ted DiBiase b. Jake Roberts via countout
Ultimate Warrior b. Hulk Hogan – Warrior Splash

Ratings Comparison

Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C

Demolition vs. Colossal Connection

Original: C-
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: C+
2025 Redo: C+

Earthquake vs. Hercules

Original: D-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C+

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

Original: A
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C

Hart Foundation vs. Bolsheviks

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2025 Redo: N/A

Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

Original: D
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C+

Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire vs. Randy Savage/Sensational Sherri

Original: D-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: C-
2025 Redo: C

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Original: C
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2025 Redo: C+

Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D-
2025 Redo: C-

Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts

Original: C
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C

Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2025 Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2015 Redo: A
2025 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C
2025 Redo: B

Geez it’s better than those previous reviews would have you believe. It’s not even a bad show and the main event is more than good enough to carry it.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 1991
Date: January 19, 1991
Location: Miami Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

It’s been a minute (or about eleven years) since I’ve done this show so we might as well take advantage of it being uploaded. It’s the height of the WWF using the Gulf War as a top story, which is why the evil Sgt. Slaughter is getting the WWF Title shot against the Ultimate Warrior. And there’s that whole Royal Rumble thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot of a massive American flag because it’s going to be one of those shows. This takes us to the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video hypes up some potential Royal Rumble winner, though thankfully we do hear about the rest of the card.

Roddy Piper gives quite the promo about how much he cares for the military.

Orient Express vs. Rockers

Mr. Fuji is here with the Express (Tanaka/Kato version), who jump the Rockers to start but are quickly cleared out. The Rockers go up so Kato pulls Tanaka to the floor, meaning it’s time for stereo suicide dives (a really big spot back in the day). We settle down to Jannetty headlocking Kato down, which doesn’t last long.

Instead Kato takes him into the corner, where Jannetty’s leapfrog leaves the Express crashing into each other. Michaels comes in to start on the arm but Tanaka is back up with a leg lariat. The chinlock keeps Michaels down, which doesn’t last long either as he’s on his feet for the jumping knee. Now it’s Michaels grabbing his own chinlock, followed by a sleeper to mix it up a bit.

That doesn’t last very long and everything breaks down, with the Express actually getting the better of a do-see-do. The Rockers backflip out though and stereo dropkicks have the Express on the floor. The big planchas take them out again and it’s a double back elbow for two on Kato. Jannetty slaps on the chinlock for a bit before handing it back to Michaels, who is taken into the wrong corner.

The nerve hold goes on for a good while before a double clothesline gives Tanaka two. Michaels kicks Tanaka down so the Express tries to use their belt…which Michaels dives onto sent them into each other. See he’s not just good, but he’s smart. Jannetty comes in to clean house, even with some not great dropkicks.

Everything breaks down and Tanaka kicks Jannetty into a backslide for two as we slow back down. Michaels trips Kato down for two but Jannetty gets catapulted into a chop. Back up and the catapult is loaded up again but Michaels makes a save, allowing Jannetty to sunset flip Tanaka for the pin at 19:13.

Rating: B. Good stuff here, with the Rockers getting to show just how talented they really were. Their eventual split is what gets the attention but they could do some great stuff in the ring as well. It’s nice to see a match like this getting some time and it made for an awesome opener. Throw in the underrated Express getting their chance to showcase themselves and it made for a heck of an opener.

Randy Savage says he’s the best WWF Champion of all time and it’s time for Queen Sherri to bait the Ultimate Warrior into giving Savage a title shot.

We go to the arena where Gene Okerlund is on the platform with Sherri, who wants to challenge the Ultimate Warrior. She knows Sgt. Slaughter would give Randy Savage a title shot because he’s brave, but she’s not sure in Warrior’s case. Sherri calls Warrior out for a chat but he won’t say anything about the challenge. She then talks about his lips, chest and hair while walking around him.

With that not working, she opens his jacket and kneels before him, asking if Warrior will be honorable and a great champion by giving Savage a title shot. Warrior starts shaking and screams NO in her face and we cut to the back where Savage is livid and swears revenge. He runs into the arena but Warrior is gone. This segment has always been kind of cringey and that was the feeling again here.

Big Boss Man vs. Barbarian

This is part of Boss Man’s march through the Heenan Family (meaning Bobby Heenan is here too) to get revenge on Heenan himself. Barbarian bails to the floor to start and walks around a bit, getting inside for the lockup about 1:45 in. Boss Man boots him in the face and hits an elbow which has Barbarian out on the floor and Boss Man spinning in circles. You can criticize Boss Man about a few things, but in this era, he was never phoning it in.

Back in and Barbarian gets in a shot to go up top, only for Boss Man to knock him out of the air. A Cactus Clothesline sends Barbarian outside for another breather, with Boss Man rather fired up (shocking I know). Back in and Barbarian muscles him up with a suplex and hits a clothesline as commentary talks about how strong these two really are. Well, yeah, they’re power wrestlers.

They head outside, with Boss Man’s back being sent into the post to leave him down for a bit. Even Heenan can get in a few shots before Boss Man is sent inside for a bearhug. The comeback doesn’t last long as the bearhug goes right back on. Boss Man fights out again and manages a knockdown to get a bit of a break.

A clothesline gives Boss Man two as the foot is on the rope, meaning it’s a collision to leave them both down again. Barbarian gets up top for the clothesline but walks into the Boss Man Slam….for two, as he gets a hand on the rope. Boss Man is knocked back again so Barbarian goes up for a high crossbody, with Boss Man rolling through for the pin at 14:15.

Rating: C+. Boss Man was doing some of his best work around this point and it was interesting to see him face someone who could match him with power. This was just another step in the Heenan Family story for Boss Man and that’s not a bad way to go. The fans were behind him here and that isn’t a surprise given the effort he was putting in every time he was out there.

Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan promise to create even more turmoil. The people here need a leader and he will provide that, as Ultimate Warrior’s time as champion is no longer even measured in hours.

Ultimate Warrior isn’t so convinced.

WWF Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is challenging and Piper goes off about the love of the military again. A cheap shot with the flag pole doesn’t work as Warrior knocks Slaughter outside and rips up the Iraqi flag, sending Piper into overdrive. The flag is shoved into Slaughter’s mouth (that isn’t sanitary) and there’s his big bump over the corner.

Cue Sherri to watch at ringside as Warrior sends him back inside for the running shoulders. Sherri trips the leg so the chase is on, with Savage jumping Warrior near the entrance. A shot with a light stand leaves Warrior down and he takes his sweet time getting back to the ring. Thankfully Slaughter is smart enough to keep breaking up the count, as otherwise he can’t win the title.

Back in and Slaughter hits a backbreaker and spits on him before sending Warrior face first into the curled boot. A double clothesline gives them a double breather, with Slaughter popping up first…and falling right back down. Warrior gets up as well and walks right into a bearhug. That’s broken up so Slaughter drops him again, this time for the camel clutch. The feet are underneath the ropes though and Warrior starts another comeback, only to have to pull in the invading Sherri. Cue Savage with the scepter to shatter it over the Warrior’s head (because this referee is blind), giving Slaughter the pin and the title at 12:45.

Rating: C. They had to do it. Slaughter was the top heel in the company, but more importantly, Warrior just wasn’t clicking as champion. It was clear that there was nothing going on there and while you could put part of that on things beyond Warrior’s control (Hogan still being around), he wasn’t working in the spot. Yeah the result is there to set up Hogan triumphing for America, but what choice did they have?

Warrior chases after Savage and Slaughter is announced as champion, sending Monsoon and Piper into some awesome rants about how he didn’t earn it.

The Mountie vs. Koko B. Ware

Jimmy Hart is here with Mountie. They start slowly with Ware chasing him out to the floor, meaning it’s time to hit the stall button. Back in and Ware takes him down by the arm and cranks away, earning himself a right hand. Mountie avoids a charge and sends him out to the floor, followed by what looks like a claw back inside. Naturally Hart goes over to mock Frankie the bird, because Hart is amazing.

The piledriver is loaded up but Ware backdrops his way to freedom. Ware fights back and hits the missile dropkick (sticking the landing of course) but he makes the mistake of going after Hart. The distraction lets Mountie grab something like a chokeslam (uh, ok then) for the pin at 9:12.

Rating: C-. This was the filleriest of filler matches you could ask for, with pretty much nothing of note happening, saves for Ware’s always awesome dropkick. That being said, Hart yelling at Frankie was one of the best things I’ve seen in a long time, as Hart was always fine with looking goofy. Somehow, Mountie would be Intercontinental Champion a year later. The biggest surprise? The gimmick lasted for A YEAR.

Randy Savage isn’t sorry for costing Ultimate Warrior the title. Then he and Sherri run away at the sound of someone at the door.

Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan are proud of their victory because they told you so. Unlike the rest of the military, he has no boundaries. We must be in intermission.

Piper goes on another rant about Slaughter. If there was a February PPV, Piper getting a title shot would have been ALL the money.

Jake Roberts, Earthquake, Greg Valentine, the Texas Tornado, the Legion Of Doom, Undertaker (with Brother Love), Jim Duggan, Rick Martel, Mr. Perfect and Tugboat are ready for the Royal Rumble.

Roddy Piper doesn’t think much of Virgil being Ted DiBiase’s servant.

DiBiase says Virgil does everything for him for the almighty dollar. Virgil looks ready to kill him.

Ted DiBiase/Virgil vs. Dusty Rhodes/Dustin Rhodes

No polka dots for Dusty here. The villains are cleared out to start and DiBiase tells Virgil to go take them out. Back in and Dustin takes over on Virgil without much trouble, followed by a clothesline out to the floor. Virgil gets sent outside again and now DiBiase is willing to do it himself. That means taking over on Dustin, so it’s quickly off to Dusty for the elbows in the corner.

The sleeper has DiBiase in more trouble so Virgil has to make a save. Dustin comes back in and gets his knee taken out, allowing Virgil to actually take over for once. DiBiase wraps the knee around the post and it’s time for some double teaming…but Virgil clotheslines DiBiase by mistake. That’s too much for DiBiase, who beats Virgil up and sends him outside, only for Dusty to miss a charge and get rolled up (with trunks) for the pin at 9:58.

Rating: C. The match was pretty much just a backdrop for Virgil finally having enough of DiBiase, to the point where it got physical between them. They had a great run but you had to do the turn at some point and this made sense. At the same time, this was pretty much it for Dusty and Dustin, with the former heading back to (kind of) run WCW, where he was much better suited.

Post match DiBiase berates Virgil again and orders him to put the Million Dollar Title around his waist. Instead, Virgil throws it down, with DiBiase telling him to pick it up. Virgil does so, and blasts him with the belt for the big turn and monster pop. And then after Wrestlemania, they never could follow up on it.

Hulk Hogan promises to win the Royal Rumble for the troops. We’re told that Sgt. Slaughter is planning to deface the American flag and you might as well just make Wrestlemania right now. Then Hogan forgets Sadaam Hussein’s name and the whole thing goes off the rails.

Royal Rumble

Two minute intervals and Bret Hart is in at #1 (second time in four years) and Dino Bravo is in at #2. Piper does his job as a commentator and makes sure to go over the rules (remember that this is only the third time with the 30 man variety so it was still pretty new) as Hart takes over with an early atomic drop. Bravo knocks him down and starts stomping away but misses the elbow as Greg Valentine is in at #3. Valentine goes after Bravo as we’re still in his bizarre face run. That works as well as…well as well as Valentine’s face turn, though he does toss Bravo out.

Hart goes to toss Valentine out but it’s Paul Roma in at #4 (with Slick running after him for a weird visual) to break it up. The three slug it out until Kerry Von Erich is in at #5, giving us a tag match which would leave Hart wondering what in the world he’s supposed to do. They pair off for a bit until Rick Martel is in at #6. That means more general brawling until Saba Simba is in at #7 to add some muscle.

Even more brawling ensues with no one even getting close to an elimination until Butch is in at #8. Martel dumps Simba to clear the ring out a bit and it’s Jake Roberts (who cannot stand Martel) in at #9 to go right after him to a huge reaction. The short arm clothesline sends Martel under the ropes to the floor, with Valentine cutting Roberts off on the way back inside. Roberts can’t quite knock Martel off the apron and it’s Hercules in at #10. That gives us Hart, Valentine, Roma, Von Erich, Martel, Butch, Roberts and Hercules for rather unique midcard lineup.

That means more standing around on the ropes and brawling until Tito Santana is in at #11. Roma misses a charge and crashes out to the floor and Von Erich grabs a Claw on I believe Hercules. Undertaker is in at #12 and immediately gets rid of Hart before doing the scary faced choking. Jimmy Snuka (with his crazy afro) is in at #13 and Undertaker tosses Butch as they’re doing a better job of keeping things moving. Davey Boy Smith is in at #14 and the ring is starting to get full.

There’s nothing else going on at the moment so we’ll stop to look at fans who realize they can get on TV near the front row, leaving the security guard to clear them out. There’s nothing in particular about these fans, but it’s talking about them or talking about Hercules and Von Erich in the Royal Rumble. Smash is in at #15 and the nothing continues. Roberts is tossed out and Hawk is in at #16, with a bunch of people going after him.

That’s broken up and it’s Shane Douglas (looking like Brian Pillman) in at #17. Von Erich and Snuka are out back to back and #18….is no one, as nobody comes through the curtain. More on this later so we’ll go with Undertaker hitting Smith low without doing much damage. The person who didn’t enter is officially eliminated and Animal is in at #19. The LOD gets rid of Undertaker but Hawk is thrown out as well, with Crush coming in at #20.

That gives us Valentine, Martel, Hercules, Santana, Bulldog, Smash, Douglas, Animal and Crush. Demolition double teams the Bulldog and Jim Duggan is in at #21. Animal’s bearhug on Martel doesn’t last long and it’s Earthquake in at #22. Animal fires off some running clotheslines but misses a charge and gets dumped. Mr. Perfect is in at #23 and takes a heck of a bump off Duggan’s whip into the corner. It might not make sense from a physics standpoint but it looked good. Duggan’s missed charge puts him out as well and none of that matters as Hulk Hogan is in at #24.

A bunch of people jump him but Smash is the first one out. Some right hands rock Earthquake but Perfect comes over to cut Hogan off. Smith makes a save of his own and it’s Haku in at #25. Hogan tosses Valentine to little fanfare after almost 45 minutes and Jim Neidhart is in at #26. Santana is out and Luke it in at #27, lasting a then record 4 seconds before marching right back to the back (and it’s still funny).

Brian Knobbs is in at #28 and things are slowing down a big. Hogan sends Perfect into the corner, likely jealous over Perfect wearing the yellow singlet. Knobbs actually tosses Hercules and it’s Warlord in at #29. Hogan tosses Crush and gets pummeled by Knobbs, with Perfect coming over to help. Perfect chops Warlord by mistake so Hogan is back over to go after Warlord as well. A clothesline gets rid of Warlord and it’s Tugboat to complete the field (meaning Randy Savage was #18 who didn’t show up, likely out of fear of the Ultimate Warrior).

We have a final grouping of Martel, Bulldog, Douglas, Earthquake, Perfect, Hogan, Haku, Neidhart, Knobbs and Tugboat, which isn’t exactly great. Douglas is tossed and Tugboat actually splashes Hogan in the corner, which is good for a toss to the apron. Back up and Hogan dumps Tugboat, which is actually deserved for once. Bulldog dropkicks Perfect out and Martel actually dumps Neidhart.

Bulldog backdrops Haku out as the ring is clearing in a hurry. That leaves us with five, as Martel goes up, which just seems dump. Bulldog crotches him on top and hits a clothesline, leaving us with Bulldog, Hogan, Earthquake and Knobbs. Earthquake and Knobbs get rid of Bulldog and Earthquake splashes Hogan, which means it’s time to celebrate.

The Earthquake crushes Hogan, who pops up and kicks Knobbs out without much trouble. The big boot drops Earthquake and Jimmy Hart’s interference is easily cut off. Hogan tries a slam but Earthquake falls on top of him and the big elbow crushes Hogan again. Earthquake powerslams Hogan, which triggers the Hulk Up. Hogan hits the slam and knocks him out to win at 1:05:18.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly a thrilling Rumble, but it was best known as the one where Brian Knobbs was there at the end. What else do you really need to know about it? The last two years have ended with Hogan facing a pair of villains. Last year it was Rick Rude and Mr. Perfect, while this year it was Earthquake and Knobbs. There were a few ok parts to the match, but Hogan had to win after the big soul crushing loss from Warrior. They were still figuring out the Rumble formula here and this didn’t work very well.

Hogan poses a lot, including holding a bunch of signs to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It was not a good time for the WWF and this show was a good illustration of why. You had a good opener, but the rest of the show is just totally mediocre, with something of a transition from the Golden Era taking place. Things wouldn’t get much better anytime soon, though Savage vs. Warrior would be rather excellent. Unfortunately that didn’t happen here, as instead we got a bunch of matches which were just kind of there, plus the good opener. Skip this one, as you probably have.

Ratings Comparison

The Rockers vs. The Orient Express

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2026 Redo: B

Big Boss Man vs. Barbarian

Original: B
2013 Redo: C
2026 Redo: C+

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ultimate Warrior

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C

The Mountie vs. Koko B. Ware

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2026 Redo: C-

Ted DiBiase/Virgil vs. Dustin Rhodes/Dusty Rhodes

Original: B
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D
2026 Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D+
2026 Redo: C-

Geez and I thought I was being harsh on the show this time.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble 1992
Date: January 19, 1992
Location: Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

It’s time to get back to one of the classics as this one comes up on the request list pretty regularly. Since this is going to be my fourth time looking at it, odds are this is going to be the last time I look at it for a very good while. You probably know the big attraction by heart at this point and that should be more than enough to carry the whole thing. Let’s get to it.

We open with Vince McMahon narrating a list of Royal Rumble entrants, which does have a certain charm as he is SO into it.

Commentary runs down most of the card. There are only five matches, so a full list wouldn’t be too much to ask.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

The Express (Kato/Tanaka) has Mr. Fuji with them. Owen and Kato start things off as Heenan ignores everything else to talk about Ric Flair in the Royal Rumble (fair enough in this case). Kato’s O’Connor roll is countered into an armbar, followed by a running hurricanrana to give Owen two. Neidhart comes in for an armbar of his own before it’s off to Tanaka for another showdown.

Tanaka bounces off of Neidhart as commentary talks about Neidhart’s questionable sanity. A spinebuster sets up Owen’s middle rope elbow as commentary finally starts talking about the match in front of them. That lasts all of ten seconds as we switch over to the Mountie winning the Intercontinental Title from a rather sick Bret Hart (not quite) at a recent house show. Heenan: “He had a 104 degree temperature. I’ve wrestled with an 113 degree temperature! It’s not that big of a deal!”

Neidhart hits a double clothesline to set up Owen’s high crossbody, followed by a spinwheel kick for two on Kato. Tanaka gets in a kick from the apron though and a Fuji cane shot lets the villains take over. Kato is back up with a jumping back elbow for two as Heenan tries to leave to consult with Flair before the Rumble. We get our first “fair to Flair” of the day as Owen does Breth’s chest first into the buckle bump. A superkick gives Tanaka two so he does it again, setting up a headbutt to the, ahem, lower abdomen (even commentary isn’t sure on that one).

Owen fights up and gets over for the tag but the referee doesn’t see it thanks to a well timed distraction (because the classics always work). Instead a belly to belly plants Tanaka for two, leaving them both down. Neidhart gets drawn in again, allowing a double clothesline for two on Owen. Another superkick drops Owen again but he gets back up with a double dropkick. The hot tag brings in Neidhart to clean house as everything breaks down. Owen hits a heck of a suicide dive on Kato, setting up the Rocket Launcher for the pin (Monsoon: “Sayonara baby!”) at 17:19.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that I miss in modern wrestling: take some talented people and put them in the ring together for a good while with little on the line. I get why it wouldn’t go over well today, but dang it is a nice flashback to a different era. The New Foundation wasn’t exactly as good as the Harts, but they were good enough to put in a nice effort like this one here.

We look at the Mountie defeating the sick Bret Hart to win the Intercontinental Title. Mountie kept the beatdown going after the match until Roddy Piper made the save. Another sneak attack from Mountie didn’t work, but now we have a title match.

Jimmy Hart is ECSTATIC over the Mountie winning the title. Mountie promises to beat Roddy Piper up, while taking his manhood AND his skirt.

Roddy Piper says we’re looking at one of the original Village People in the Mountie. First, Mountie wants to take Piper’s integrity, but Piper doesn’t have any! Then he’s coming for Piper’s manhood. Piper is here to wrestle, but he doesn’t know what Mountie is here to do. Tonight, Piper can win two titles and now he has to go win the first one.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Mountie is defending and has Jimmy Hart in his corner. Piper unloads to start and Mountie bails outside fast. A Hart distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, followed by some leapfrogs back inside. You can only do that to Piper for so long though as he sends Mountie into the buckle a few times. There’s a bulldog out of the corner as commentary bickers about how many rights Heenan has.

Hart’s distraction lets Mountie get in a few shots, including some face first rams into the buckle. A sunset flip gives Piper two as Heenan again claims the 113 degree temperature, which he survived thanks to half of a children’s Aspirin. Back up and Piper sends him over the top, only to have Mountie skin the cat. Piper sends him into an interfering Hart though, grabs the sleeper, and wins the title at 5:20.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing, but was anyone buying the Mountie as having a chance against Piper? The whole thing was a way to transition the title off of Bret to set up the eventual showdown with Piper at Wrestlemania. Piper winning a title after all those years as a star is great to see though and that was the other major point. Bad match, but a good result.

Post match Hart tries to come in with Mountie’s shock stick, which Piper takes and uses on the Mountie instead. We do get a classic Fink AND NEEEEW moment, with Piper getting to hold the title for a great moment.

Hulk Hogan is ready to win the Royal Rumble, where he won’t have any friends because he wants the WWF Title back.

The Bushwhackers and Jamison (a disturbingly nerdy guy with a bad suit and a sock sitting out of his pocket) are ready for the Beverly Sisters’ final fling. They’ll beat up the Genius too.

Bushwhackers vs. Beverly Brothers

Jamison and the Genius are here too. We hit the stall button to start, with two and a half minutes passing before the Brothers jump Luke to start the physicality. Luke fights up and bites the back of Blake’s tights, setting up a double forearm to put the Brothers outside. We settle down to Beau vs. Butch as commentary talks about Jack Tunney actually doing something lately.

Beau gets in a cheap shot to take over as commentary talks about 20,000 fans here (17,000 official, so at least it’s not that far off). Everything breaks down again and the Bushwhackers clear the ring for the second time as we are somehow almost seven minutes into this. The Beverlies both try sneaking up from behind to even less avail but this time Butch goes outside to beat up Beau. A cheap shot to Luke finally gets us into a more traditional match, with the Beverlys taking turns with the elbows. Jamison: “Stop cheating!”

A backbreaker puts Luke down again and there’s a headbutt to the back for two. Heenan rants about his tax money going to Jamison as this match just keeps going. Luke gets beaten up again as genius slaps Jamison. One shot is finally enough for Luke to get over for the tag to Butch so house can be cleaned. The Battering Ram hits Blake and a running headbutt gets two on Beau. The referee has to get Luke out though and Blake hits a top rope ax handle to pin Butch at 14:56.

Rating: D-. Yowza this was a horrible match, with nothing good in the way of wrestling, a bunch of repetitive stalling and a lame ending. This was one of the worst pay per view matches I’ve ever seen from the WWF and the time would have been better used by airing an old pinball tournament. Awful in every sense.

Post match the Bushwhackers clean house and hold Genius back so Jamison can kick him in the shin. Good for him I’m sure.

The Legion Of Doom is ready for the Natural Disasters because they’ll fight anyone. Hawk wants the Disasters’ tongues hanging out like dead deers’.

Tag Team Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Legion Of Doom

The Disasters, with Jimmy Hart, are challenging. Hawk wastes no time in swinging away at Typhoon and everything breaks down quickly. Earthquake comes in and shrugs off Hawk’s dropkick, only to miss a (decent actually) dropkick attempt of his own. Gorilla: “He wouldn’t have hit Sky Low Low with that one!” Well no, as it would have been two feet above Low Low’s head. Think Monsoon.

It’s off to Animal for a double clothesline and knockdown, followed by Animal’s failed slam attempt to put him in trouble again. That lasts all of three seconds as Typhoon comes back in and gets his arm cranked, allowing the tag back to Hawk. A backbreaker cuts Hawk down and Typhoon adds a running crotch attack to the back. The required bearhug goes on before Earthquake steps on Hawk’s ribs.

Another bearhug goes on as Heenan is trying to pay someone to go to the back to get Flair information. This one is broken up just as quickly as the other, leaving Earthquake to miss a splash in the corner. Hawk manages a middle rope elbow to the head and it’s finally off to Animal to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and they fight to the floor, with only Typhoon beating the count back in for the win at 9:24.

Rating: D+. While it wasn’t good, this is just slightly better than the other tag match and that is what matters here. At the end of the day, the match was about setting up something in the future, even if that didn’t quite happen. The match wasn’t exactly fun to watch, as Earthquake and Typhoon are only going to be able to do so much in the ring. Throw in the LOD being a bit limited in their own right and this was about as good as it was going to get.

Post match the brawl is on and the Disasters are cleared out.

In the back, Jimmy Hart and the Disasters rant a lot.

Roddy Piper is very happy with his win and dedicates it to his son Colt.

After a clip of the famous Barber Shop split, Shawn Michaels doesn’t care that Marty Jannetty is out of the Rumble because Shawn is going to win it anyway.

Ric Flair has drawn #3 and doesn’t care, because he’s Ric Flair.

Randy Savage is ready to get back to the top of the mountain.

Sid Justice is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Repo Man is ready to repossess the WWF Title.

British Bulldog is ready to win another battle royal, just like he won another one last year at Royal Albert Hall in London.

Jake Roberts is ready to get what he needs and beat up Randy Savage at the same time. Trust him.

Mr. Perfect and Ric Flair are ready for the latter to prove that he is the REAL World’s Champion.

Paul Bearer is ready for 29 caskets as the Undertaker is WWF Champion again.

Hulk Hogan is ready for it to be every man for himself in the Royal Rumble so he can get the title back. Hogan was sounding rather whiny and a bit paranoid here.

Jack Tunney gives us a brief welcome and says may the best man win.

WWF Title: Royal Rumble

For the vacant title (after Hulk Hogan cheated to take it back from Undertaker) with two minute intervals. British Bulldog is in at #1 and Ted DiBiase is in at #2 as Heenan is already calculating odds on Flair’s ring time. Bulldog hammers away but charges into an elbow in the corner. DiBiase grabs some suplexes as Heenan suggests going through the ropes and hiding to kill time.

Bulldog gets thrown over the top but hangs on and runs back in to toss DiBiase, leaving Heenan upset. Ric Flair is in at #3 (Heenan: “NO!” Monsoon: “YES!”), sending Monsoon into a statement about how no one from entrants #1-5 has ever made it to the end. Heenan apologizes for not being able to be objective as Bulldog grabs the gorilla press. Flair gets in a poke to the eye for a breather as Jerry Sags is in at #4.

Bulldog gets double teamed as Heenan wants Flair to go rest in the corner. A double clothesline gets Bulldog out of trouble and there’s a dropkick to get rid of Sags (Heenan: “OH NO!”). Haku is in at #5 and goes after Flair (Heenan: “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HAKU??? HAVE YOU GONE NUTS???” You know, because HAKU is most well known for his calm, rational demeanor), who actually takes him down and drops a knee to the head. Bulldog gets rid of Flair and Shawn Michaels is in at #6.

A superkick drops Flair fast (not yet the big time finisher) and another….lands in the general vicinity of Bulldog’s head as Heenan wants a stiff drink. We also start the weird timing as Heenan says Flair has been in over ten minutes despite the match not even going for ten minutes yet. Tito Santana is in at #7 and has Flair upside down in the corner (Heenan: “PERFECT! GET OUT HERE!”).

Flair slips out and gives Santana a belly to back suplex, followed by a low blow to Bulldog (Heenan: “I’d do that to my grandmother if I had to!”). The Barbarian is in at #8 (Heenan: “When I managed him, he barely liked me!”) and everyone brawls around without much going on. The Texas Tornado is in at #9 and goes right after Flair as Heenan is sounding increasingly desperate. Things slow down even more (fair enough) as the Repo Man is in at #10, giving us Bulldog, Flair, Michaels, Santana Barbarian, Tornado and Repo Man.

Barbarian and Flair double team Tornado and it’s Greg Valentine (in his bizarre face run) at #11. Naturally he goes right for Flair as Heenan talks about how the Perfect Plan called for Flair to go no more than 30 minutes. Flair kicks Repo Man low and it’s Nikolai Volkoff (Heenan: “300 pound Lithuanian!”) in at #11. Valentine grabs the Figure Four on Flair (Heenan….well you can just imagine) as Volkoff is tossed out to clear some of the ring. The Big Boss Man is in at #12 to pick up the energy a bit.

There goes Valentine, with Repo Man and Bulldog following him. Tornado is out as well as Heenan is begging Flair to get away from Boss Man. Santana and Michaels are both out and it’s Hercules at #13. Flair chops at Barbarian (Heenan: “NO RIC!”) and gets gorilla pressed for his efforts. Hercules dumps Barbarian (saving Flair in the process) but gets tossed as well. Boss Man clotheslines Flair but misses a charge and gets low bridged out, leaving Flair alone in the ring.

It’s Roddy Piper in at #14 and Heenan is beside himself as Flair is in even bigger trouble. Piper beats him up and takes it to the floor to keep up the beating. Back in and it’s an airplane spin into the sleeper to knock Flair mostly out. Jake Roberts is in at #15 to sit in the corner as the sleeper continues. Roberts goes after Piper (Heenan: “Thank you Jake!”) before hitting the short arm clothesline (Heenan: “You no good….”). Piper makes the save (Heenan: “It’s not a skirt! It’s a kilt!”) and Flair puts the Figure Four on Roberts. That’s broken up by Piper (Heenan: “You no good skirt wearing…..”) and it’s Jim Duggan in at #16.

Even Monsoon is praising Flair’s conditioning at this point as Heenan thinks Hulk Hogan is behind the order of entrants. Duggan punches Flair into the corner as Roberts does the same to Piper. It’s IRS in at #17 and it’s a double noggin knocker from Duggan to Roberts/Flair, giving us a Flair Flop. Jimmy Snuka is in at #18 and he still looks weird in those long tights. Heenan: “He’s wasting time!” Monsoon: “He is not!” Heenan: “I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.”

Piper chops on Flair in the corner but hands him off to Roberts, who can’t get rid of him. The Undertaker is in at #20 and Heenan is….oddly kind of calm about it. That gives us Flair, Piper, Roberts, Duggan, IRS, Snuka and Undertaker, with Snuka being tossed almost immediately. Undertaker grabs Flair by the throat, with Heenan declaring that everything is over. Duggan saves Flair and gets kicked low by Undertaker (that’s a weird visual) as Randy Savage is in at #21, meaning Roberts bails straight to the floor (not out).

Undertaker jumps Savage from behind so Piper comes back in, only to get kneed over the top by Savage. Hold on though as Savage dives over the top to go after Roberts again….but Undertaker throws Savage back inside, apparently because he wasn’t THROWN over the top. Ignore that this goes against previously established rules, but since when has that mattered? Flair stomps on Savage in the corner and hits Undertaker low, the latter of which doesn’t seem to matter.

Berzerker is in at #22 and hammers on various people as Heenan panics at Flair going after Savage. Undertaker and Piper choke Flair until Virgil is in at #23. Flair survives an Undertaker elimination attempt and it’s Colonel Mustafa in at #24. Monsoon refers to Flair as “Martel” twice, even as Duggan punches Flair in the face. Piper beats on Flair in the corner and it’s Rick Martel in at #25.

Heenan thinks some of the bigger names have gotten some great luck in the drawing, again forgetting an announcement on Superstars that some of the bigger names were guaranteed later numbers. Mustafa is out and everyone brawls….until Hulk Hogan is in at #26 (Heenan: “OH MY GOD NO!”). The brawl is on again as Heenan starts bargaining with God to let Heenan win. Hogan gets rid of Undertaker and Berzerker back to back with Virgil and Duggan going out at the same time.

Skinner is in at #27 as Heenan thinks Flair should be the Real World’s Champion no matter what. Sgt. Slaughter is in at #28 as Skinner is out. Hogan and Piper go at it, with Monsoon sounding almost surprised because they’re friends, despite having one of the most famous rivalries in wrestling history. Flair officially sets the all time record as Sid Justice is in at #29 to quite the reaction.

More brawling ensues as Warlord is in at #30, giving us a final grouping of Flair, Piper, IRS, Savage, Martel, Hogan, Slaughter, Sid and Warlord. Hogan slams Flair at the top and they both roll outside (not eliminated) to fight some more outside. Sid dumps Slaughter as Monsoon can’t believe that Flair is still here. Granted he also thinks Flair has been here for an hour when we’re still coming up on an hour into the match.

Piper pulls IRS out by the tie and Sid dumps Warlord to get us down to six. Sid gets rid of Martel and Piper, leaving us with Savage, Sid, Hogan and Flair, which makes me want to play Super Wrestlemania. There goes Savage as well, leaving Hogan to punch Flair over the top. Hogan goes to dump him but Sid tosses Hogan instead. Ever the nice guy, Hogan grabs Sid’s arm because “you stole my belt”, allowing Flair to dump Sid (with Hogan’s help) for the win and the title at 1:02:02. Heenan: “YESx50!”

Rating: A. Yes it’s still great and it still works as well as probably any Rumble would for almost ten more years. Flair has a great performance in setting the record and never once seeming like he was laying around for any extended period of time. You also have a star studded lineup with all kinds of people feeling like dark horse candidates, meaning there was little down time. Then of course there’s Heenan, who has the call of a lifetime as you can picture him losing his mind at everything falling apart. Monsoon laughing at Heenan when Flair comes out early but then respecting Flair by the end is great too, making this a masterpiece.

Post match Hogan and Sid bicker a lot, setting up Wrestlemania. I remember watching this at around four years old and wondering why Hogan was upset when he was eliminated without breaking any rules. There was no reason for him to be angry over this and he was just whining.

In the back, Jack Tunney presents Ric Flair with the title, allowing Flair to give the incredible “with a tear in my eye” speech, talking about how this is the title that matters the most in the world. Flair, Perfect and Heenan all WOO in celebration. Perfect: “We’re not the kind of guys to say we told you so but….we told you so!” After Flair cracks up at that one (and Gene gets in the infamous “PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT!”), Gene signs off and sends us to the highlight package to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. This is a weird show as the main event is the ONLY thing that matters (though the Piper title win was a very nice moment) and everything else is pretty minor. The problem is one of those two matches is horrible and another is pretty bad, bringing the overall rating down a bit. That being said, this is the definition of a one match show and there is little reason to watch anything but the Intercontinental Title match and the main event. One is a feel good moment and the other is an all time classic, so we’ll call this quite the success.

WWF, 2022, 1992, Redo, Royal Rumble, New Foundation, Orient Express, Mountie, Roddy Piper, Jimmy Hart, Hulk Hogan, Bushwhackers, Beverly Brothers, Jamison, The Genius, Natural Disasters, Legion Of Doom, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, Sid Justice, Randy Savage, Undertaker

Ratings Comparison

New Foundation vs. Orient Express

Original: C+
2013 Redo: B-
2018 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C+

The Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

Original: B
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

Original: F+
2013 Redo: T (The Worst Match In Royal Rumble History)
2018 Redo: F
2023 Redo: D-

Legion of Doom vs. Natural Disasters

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2023 Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B
2023 Redo: A-

I’m pretty much done with this show after this one, though it’s still rather great.

Survivor Series 1990
Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

I haven’t looked at this one in a long time so we might as well do it here. This is a big one from a historical stance, with an all time debut and something that is much more infamous than anything else. Other than that, we have the usual Survivor Series matches, plus an idea that they never used again. Let’s get to it.

We get the rather cool squares intros, showing all of the matches tonight, including the team names, which always add a nice flavor to the whole thing.

So the other deal here is that we have the Grand Finale Match of Survival, where the winners will face off again in a final Survivor Series match. Yeah I don’t get the point either.

The Ultimate Warriors promise to win. Well in theory that’s what Warrior says, as he rambles on about sacrifice and forming a bond with no medicine being able to cure what they have. I think.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Perfect Team

Ultimate Warriors: Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion Of Doom
Perfect Team: Mr. Perfect, Demolition

Mr. Fuji and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains. They take their sweet time settling down until Animal tackles Smash to start fast. A shot to the ribs slows Animal down and it’s Perfect coming in to stay on said ribs. Animal powerslams his way out of trouble and gets in an atomic drop, allowing the double tag to Von Erich and Ax (whose hair isn’t slicked back and who pretty clearly doesn’t want to be anywhere near this show). The Claw has Ax in trouble and it’s off to Warrior for the shoulder and splash for the elimination at 3:24. That’s the last you would see of Ax in the WWF ever again, and he can’t get out of the ring fast enough.

Crush comes in to clothesline Warrior but it’s off to Hawk to choke Perfect. One heck of a missed charge hits the post though and Demolition gets to hammer on Hawk. That doesn’t last long as Hawk is back up with a top rope clothesline and everything breaks down. The referee isn’t playing with this one and disqualifies the Legion of Doom and Demolition at 7:45, leaving us with Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado. Piper: “I’M WRITING IT DOWN!”

Warrior comes in but Perfect wants Tornado, who comes in and knocks Perfect over the top. Perfect needs a breather on the floor so Warrior sends him into Heenan. Back in and Perfect avoids a charge into the post before going to the eyes to really keep Tornado in trouble. A ram into an exposed buckle into the PerfectPlex finishes Tornado at 11:05 and we’re one on one.

Warrior comes in and gets PerfectPlexed for two, but because it’s a finisher, he’s down for a bit. A clothesline gets two, with Warrior’s kickout sending Perfect onto the referee. That doesn’t have an impact this time as Warrior fights up and starts the clothesline comeback. The shoulder and splash finish Perfect for the win at 14:21.

Rating: D+. This was just lame in every sense of the word, as they never bothered to put in any effort, the double DQ was just lazy, and the ending was never in doubt as the villains were fighting from behind for most of the match. It was clear that Warrior had nothing to do at the moment and Perfect wasn’t a serious challenger. Pretty awful match here and still one of the worst in the show’s history.

The Million Dollar Team is ready to win, even with their absent mystery partner.

Dream Team vs. Million Dollar Team

Dream Team: Dusty Rhodes, Hart Foundation, Koko B. Ware
Million Dollar Team: Ted DiBiase, Rhythm And Blues, ???

So this is a famous one as DiBiase (Virgil) brings out the mystery partner, complete with his own manager Brother Love, the Undertaker. And this is immediately a hit, with Piper getting in the famous line of “LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT HAMHOCK!” This is one of those cases where everyone collectively went “….whoa” as you don’t see something like this very often and the people knew it.

Hart and Undertaker start things off and the proto chokeslam takes Hart down. Neidhart comes in and is immediately slammed so it’s off to Ware, who is piledriven (Monsoon: “He just got hit with the Tombstone!”) for the elimination at 1:45, instantly making Undertaker look like an absolute monster. Hart comes in and hammers away, so Undertaker glares at him and tags out in an almost eerie moment. The good guys start taking over on Valentine’s arm but he gets a knee up in the corner to cut Hart off. Honky Tonk Man comes in and is promptly powerslammed to give Neidhart the elimination at 4:24.

It’s off to DiBiase to hammer on Neidhart (makes sense on an Anvil), who fights up for the tag to the (non polka-dotted) Dusty. Elbows and a dropkick have DiBiase in trouble so it’s back to Neidhart, who gets tripped by Virgil. That’s enough for DiBiase to hit a clothesline for the elimination at 5:57, because people get pinned by clotheslines at the Survivor Series.

Hart comes back in and stomps away in the corner before Rhodes comes in and gets dropped with a shot to the face. It’s back to Undertaker, who chokes Hart in the corner but hands it back to DiBiase, who gets atomic dropped. Rhodes comes back in and gets dropped again, with Undertaker hitting a top rope ax handle to pin Rhodes at 8:33. Undertaker throws Rhodes over the top so Love can stomp away. That earns him a stalking to the back, with Undertaker following and getting counted out at 9:26, as they had to do something to avoid him getting pinned in his debut.

So it’s Hart vs. Valentine/DiBiase, but Hart small packages Valentine for the pin at 10:02 to get us down to one on one. Hart wastes no time in knocking DiBiase outside for a slingshot dive and a posting. Back in and Hart hammers away in the corner but DiBiase is back up with some chops. Hart seems to hurt his leg running the ropes, but it’s the not yet standard goldbricking so he can roll DiBiase up for two. Hart gets two off the middle rope elbow and tries a crossbody, with DiBiase rolling through for the final pin at 14:02.

Rating: B. This was a tale of two star making performances as Hart (who was dedicating the match to his brother, who had passed away the day before) had another one of those showings that made you know he was going to be something special. That being said, there’s a reason the Undertaker’s debut is one of the best ever, as sweet goodness he looked like an absolute star and you knew it was something special. Granted I don’t think anyone could have guessed how special, but it’s still effective over thirty five years later, so they’re definitely onto something.

Hart yelling F*** into the camera after the fall is oddly missing here.

The Vipers are in the shower and ready for a bunch of individual battles in their team match.

Vipers vs. Visionaries

Vipers: Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
Visionaries: Rick Martel, Power and Glory, Warlord

This is built around Martel blinding Roberts with his arrogance cologne. Snuka is looking horrible here, with a huge afro and a not so great looking face. Jannetty and the Warlord start things off, meaning Piper can make I Am The Walrus jokes. Warlord misses a charge into the corner to start but is fine enough to shrug off some dropkicks. Jannetty picks up thee pace with some right hands and Shawn clotheslines Warlord into a sunset flip.

Martel comes in and gets hiptossed into a dropkick with Martel bailing out to the floor. Roberts grabs a wristlock on Roma and it’s quickly off to Hercules vs. Snuka. The rapid fire tags bring Jannetty back in to hammer on Warlord, who powerslams him out of the air (that looked great) for the pin at 5:19.

Michaels comes in with a hurricanrana before it’s back to Roberts for a clothesline to put Warlord down. One heck of a backdrop sends Michaels flying and Hercules drops him with a clothesline. A hard whip into the corner gets two on Michaels but he avoids a charge into the post. Snuka comes in to unload in the corner before firing off a middle rope crossbody, but Martel rolls through and grabs tights for the pin at 9:46.

Roberts comes in to go after Martel, who hands it off to Hercules, much to Roberts’ annoyance. The threat of a DDT sends Hercules bailing out to the floor and a cheap shot (as Roberts can barely see) takes Roberts down. Roma misses a top rope fist drop though and it’s back to Michaels (who was injured by Power & Glory). A middle rope elbow gets two on Roma but Hercules comes in off a blind tag to deck him from behind. Hercules drops him with a gorilla press and the PowerPlex makes it 4-1 at 15:17.

Warlord wastes no time with a bearhug but Roberts gets out. Since 4-1 isn’t enough, Roma offers a distraction so the referee doesn’t see the DDT….or Martel spraying Roberts with Arrogance. That’s enough for Roberts, so he grabs Damien and chases Martel (not legal, so not eliminated) to the back for the countout to wrap it up at 17:04.

Rating: C-. While not as bad as the opener, this was another boring match with pretty much nothing going on. Martel and company weren’t a good team but they were running through the Vipers like they weren’t even there. Michaels was his usual good self, but Snuka looked ancient, Jannetty wasn’t there long enough, and Roberts hit his one move. Another bad match as this show is remembered for one good thing for a reason.

The Hulkamaniacs have been surviving for a long time and now it’s time to do it again here. They also dedicate the match to the armed forces and are ready to go fight Saddam Hussein.

Hulkamaniacs vs. Natural Disasters

Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Tugboat, Jim Duggan, Big Boss Man
Natural Disasters: Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian

Jimmy Hart and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains as commentary tries to figure out the lineup for the Grand Finale match. How do you know that Rick Martel is going to be a heel? Maybe he’s a Little Warrior. Big pop for Hogan too, as there was something left to this Hulkamania thing. Piper: “What are they chanting?” Gorilla: “Hogan!” Piper: “That might have been the dumbest question I’ve asked in 1990.”

Duggan and Haku slug it out to start until Haku misses a middle rope crossbody (oh geez he can fly too). Duggan’s elbow misses as well so it’s off to Bravo for an atomic drop. Boss Man comes in to slug away on Haku, who hits a dropkick to cut him off. That earns him the Boss Man Slam and Haku is out at 3:15. Boss Man kicks Barbarian in the face but goes after Heenan, allowing Barbarian to come back with a belly to back suplex. Duggan comes in but gets powered into the corner by Earthquake, who isn’t about to be slammed. Instead Duggan grabs the 2×4 to chase Hart but stops to hit Earthquake for the DQ at 6:12.

Hogan comes in to slam all three villains and hammers away at Earthquake in the corner. That’s broken up and Earthquake plants him down, allowing Bravo to drop an elbow. Hogan goes technical though and small packages Bravo for the pin at 8:00 as the villains are playing from behind again. Boss Man comes in to slug away at Earthquake….who catches a high crossbody in mid air. Sweet goodness that’s insane. Hogan breaks it up but Barbarian gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Some elbow drops get rid of Boss Man at 9:10 to get us down to 2-2, with even commentary forgetting that Tugboat was there.

Hogan hammers on Earthquake but can’t slam him this time. He can bring in Tugboat though and the brawl with Earthquake goes to the floor for the double countout at 11:34, making it Hogan vs. Barbarian. The slow beating is on and a not great piledriver gives Barbarian two. A double clothesline leaves both of them down and it’s Barbarian up first with his big clothesline. Hogan fights up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes at 14:50.

Rating: C. And that’s the second best match of the night. This was Hogan and his friends doing Hogan’s greatest hits against a pretty generic group of villains. You could see that the magic was wearing off with Hogan as he didn’t have a top opponent (after beating Earthquake at Summerslam) and the match was only so exciting. Beating Earthquake by countout on back to back pay per views didn’t help either.

Hogan beats up Heenan for fun.

Here is Randy Savage to be annoyed at being accused of….eating Thanksgiving dinner? Either way, he’s after the Ultimate Warrior and the WWF Title, because it is being held by the Ultimate Chicken. Queen Sherri did NOT do his fighting for him when he slapped the Warrior because he is the greatest Superstar of all time.

Alliance vs. Mercenaries

Alliance: Nikolai Volkoff, Tito Santana, Bushwhackers
Mercenaries: Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express

Before the match, Slaughter mocks the American troops in the Middle East for not having a good Thanksgiving dinner. Piper is TICKED over this, to the point where I’m surprised he and Slaughter never had a title match. Butch hammers on Zhukov to start and it’s off to Santana for the flying forearm and the pin at 50 seconds. As the heels are behind AGAIN. The Battering Ram gets rid of Sato at 1:51 as they’re making it pretty clear that this match doesn’t need to be a Survivor Series match because a bunch of people are going to be gone fast.

Tanaka kicks Butch down and misses a headbutt, meaning it’s another forearm to make it 4-1 at 2:11. Volkoff comes in to hammer away in the corner but gets dropped with a clothesline. Some elbow drops begin the slow beatdown, capped off with another elbow for the pin at 5:26. The Bushwhackers are in with a double clothesline but Luke’s top rope splash hits knees. A gutbuster gives Slaughter the pin at 6:32 and Butch is out to a clothesline at 6:55.

So it’s Santana vs. Slaughter with Santana coming in off the top with a forearm to take over. Slaughter is right back with a neckbreaker and a backbreaker gets two. A suplex gives Slaughter a delayed two but the referee gets bumped. Santana hits the forearm but General Adnan comes in with the flag shot for the DQ to end this at 10:35.

Rating: D+. This show is terrible and there isn’t much of a way to hide it. It was clear that this needed to be Santana vs. Slaughter, as the match would have been better and let us skip six eliminations in about seven minutes. At the same time, Slaughter wasn’t feeling like a top heel here and there wasn’t much of a way around it.

Ted DiBiase and the Visionaries are ready for Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana, because Warrior and Hogan had issues just a few months ago at Wrestlemania.

And now, it’s time for the egg to hatch. Yeah there has been a big egg for weeks and it finally hatches to reveal….a humanoid turkey thing which Gene Okerlund dubs the Gobbledy Gooker. He and Gene go to the ring to dance and the fans boo this out of the building, as it’s just a big waste of time that adds nothing. The idea was to make a fun mascot for kids but that could have been covered by someone like Jim Duggan in a costume. Also, when you’re expecting anything interesting and get…whatever this was. This is an all time disaster and it has become a running joke for almost forty years as a result.

Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana don’t think they’re behind because the Hulkamaniacs are in their corner.

Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Visionaries/Ted DiBiase

Santana forearms Warlord for the pin at 24 seconds. Roma powerslams Santana down and DiBiase comes in with a suplex for two. Santana misses the forearm and gets caught with a hot shot for the pin at 1:52. Hogan comes in to hammer on DiBiase but Hercules comes in to get a few shots of his own. The villains keep taking turns hammering on Hogan as even Piper is telling him to get it together already. DiBiase gets two off a fist drop but the PowerPlex triggers the Hulk Up.

The clothesline finishes Roma at 5:39 so Martel comes in for the ineffective hammering. Hogan kicks him down and hands it off to Warrior who slams Martel a few times, allowing Hogan to clothesline Martel to the floor for a countout at 7:23. It’s down to DiBiase/Hercules, which would be a lot more interesting about two years ago. Hogan powers DiBiase into the corner, hits the boot and drops the leg to make it 2-1 at 8:38. The powerslam lets Warrior come back in for a shoulder and the splash to win it all at 9:09.

Rating: D. Good grief they actually made it less interesting. I didn’t think this could get worse as the rest of the show had bee but they pulled it off. I’m not sure what the point of this was other than to get Hogan and Warrior out there again, but it doesn’t really make much of a difference when we saw them both in the last few hours. Nothing to see here, with Hogan and Warrior running through some midcard villains in short order.

Overall Rating: D. There is one good match in almost two and half hours here and that match is mostly memorable for one debut and nothing more. Other than that, it was a good illustration of how things needed to change. The 80s were over and Warrior wasn’t working on top, but Hogan’s act was fairly tired and not the long term solution.

That being said, the biggest problem is the lack of major villains. Warrior had Mr. Perfect, Hogan had already had his big match with Earthquake, and other than that you had Savage on the way up, but that’s not enough to fight two superpowers. Slaughter was getting a reaction but it absolutely did not have any kind of long term shelf life. Undertaker looked good, but it was his first night and he needed time to be turned into something big.

The whole thing didn’t work and it just kept getting worse. The Gooker stuff was the big, horrible icing on the whole thing as this was a bad show, with Undertaker and Bret Hart not being enough to come close to saving it. This show was pretty bad and the company was in need of a big overhaul, which would take a lot of time.

 

 

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Summerslam 1990
Date: August 27, 1990
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 19,304
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

This is the requested redo for the year and I’m rather happy about that. I watched this show more times than I can count as a kid as it was the first wrestling show I had on video. I’ve seen it so many times that I can probably quote at least a bit of the commentary from every match and know most of the matches by heart so looking back at it should be fun. It’s a double main event as Hulk Hogan returns to face Earthquake and Ultimate Warrior defends the WWF Title against Rick Rude in a cage. Let’s get to it.

The opening video hypes up the show, including the main events. This gives us the classic 80s Vince McMahon hype voice and that is always going to work. At the end of the day, the guy is a promoter and a really good one.

Rockers vs. Power And Glory

Vince promises this this is going to be a HUMDINGER so you know he’s serious. Shawn comes to the ring so gingerly that you would think he had a bad knee and wasn’t ready to go here or something. Power And Glory, already in the ring, (it was a different time) jump Michaels before the bell and hit him in the knee with the chain to give him a reason to be down. Why is that so much to ask?

Roma hammers on Jannetty to start but Marty fights back with armdrags and dropkick (why yes, he is a face in a tag team). Slick (the evil, yet stylish) manager offers a distraction as Piper wants to know which one is the power and which is the glory. You mean him being named HERCULES isn’t a hint? Jannetty gets beaten down as Piper talks about Mick Jagger and David Bowie, perhaps missing the idea of the Rockers.

We pause to take out Michaels again as this continues to be a handicap, including a gorilla press to Jannetty. A small package doesn’t get Jannetty out of trouble as Roma comes back in and hits some backbreakers. Jannetty powerslams his way to freedom and hits the top rope fist drop (such a simple yet good looking finisher) with Hercules having to make a save. That’s finally enough as the PowerPlex puts Jannetty away at 5:59.

Rating: C. Kind of a weird way to start the show here but I do like the idea of just getting in and out without trying to do anything nuts. Power And Glory weren’t some great team but they could beat Marty in a handicap match. That’s all you had here and it went well enough, even if it was pretty clear that Shawn shouldn’t have been out there in the first place.

Post match Shawn gets in the ring and the big beatdown is on, with Marty trying to cover Shawn’s knee (another Jagger/Bowie reference from Piper). Of note: the VHS that I remember glitched at this point so I didn’t remember seeing the last minute and a half of the match until I was almost twenty years old. Shawn does a stretcher job and would be out of action for about a month and a half.

Mr. Perfect isn’t worried about facing the Texas Tornado on less than ten days’ notice, even if he knows almost nothing about Tornado. Bobby Heenan talks about how worthless Texas tornadoes are because you can see them coming a mile away. Then Perfect gets REALLY serious and says no one beats him.

The Texas Tornado promises to come out of the clouds and be powerful, unpredictable and devastating. Then he’ll go back into the clouds with the Intercontinental Title. For some reason, that one has always stuck with me, even if it isn’t very good.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado

Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, is defending. Of note: Tornado was in yellow trunks for the interview and is in white here so he doesn’t match Perfect’s yellow and blue singlet. The lockup goes to Tornado, who shoves him into the corner without much trouble. That’s enough to send Perfect outside, as commentary thinks they might be surprised by the strength. So they haven’t even looked at Tornado?

Back in and they circle each other a bit as Piper wants to know what Heenan knows about wrestling. A hard whip into the corner sets up a slam on Perfect and a clothesline puts him on the floor, with the required big bump from Perfect. Back in again and Perfect slugs his way out of a wristlock, setting up a sleeper. Some shots to the face in the corner don’t do much to Tornado, who catapults Perfect into the post and grabs the Claw. The Tornado Punch (HUGE bump from Perfect) connects for the pin and the title at 5:15.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a match as Tornado was a bit all over the place (shocking) and a lot of the stuff was rather basic. That being said, this was all about the surprise factor as Tornado gets the title almost immediately after debuting. Of note: for someone perfect, Perfect lost every pay per view match he had in 1990, though finishing as runner up in the Royal Rumble could have been worse.

Perfect staggers out of the arena in even more great selling.

In the back, Gene Okerlund can’t find Sweet Sapphire (uh oh) but Heenan and Perfect come in to rant about the bad refereeing. Tornado CHEATED by sending him into the post and now it’s time to pay. Well not now but in the near future, though that might qualify as semantics.

Sweet Sapphire vs. Sensational Queen Sherri

Sherri has a huge mask on which absolutely TERRIFIED me as a kid. And there’s no Sapphire, despite the music playing multiple times. That’s going to be a thirty second countdown forfeit and no match. Granted the fact that Sherri was in a full length dress makes me wonder what she was exactly planning for this one anyway. Commentary is very confused by Sapphire’s whereabouts.

Dusty Rhodes is in the back and says he doesn’t know where Sapphire is either as she disappeared ten minutes after they arrived. No one has seen her and he is rather worried. Cue Jim Duggan for a rather random cameo, saying everyone is still looking for Sapphire. With Duggan gone, Dusty says that Sapphire is getting a lot of really expensive gifts but that isn’t his business. GEE, I WONDER WHO IN THE WWF IS RICH ENOUGH TO SEND HER THOSE PRESENTS!

Tito Santana vs. Warlord

Slick is here with Warlord and Piper promises to not make a bunch of taco jokes about Santana. A headlock doesn’t work for Santana to start but a dropkick manages to put Warlord down. Back up and Santana looks to load up a hurricanrana (not quite in 1990) so he can hammer away to knock Warlord outside.

That’s fine with Warlord, who drives him back first into the post, allowing Slick to stalk him with a shoe (yes a shoe). The slow forearms keep Santana down until he gets a boot up in the corner to slow Warlord down. The flying forearm rocks Warlord but he gets the foot on the rope at the last minute. Warlord blocks a monkey flip out of the corner though and a running powerslam finishes at 5:28.

Rating: C. This is a fine example of a power vs. speed match and Santana knows how to do that as well as anyone else from this era. Let Santana go out there and run around while Warlord uses his power game in short spurts. It is a formula that has worked forever and it worked well enough here, even in a short form match.

Survivor Series is coming. That’s the Undertaker debut show, which always blows my mind. Look at this card and consider that three months later, you would have someone who has faced Rusev and AJ Styles.

Demolition, all three of them, won’t say which two of them will be facing the Hart Foundation. Hint: it’s probably the two holding the belts here. Either way, they aren’t worried about facing the Legion of Doom after this, because they’re just a bunch of impostors. This was just after Crush was added to the team so Ax could be written out due to what was thought to be a heart problem. In reality it was a bad allergic reaction to some kind of shellfish (not a joke) and he was fine soon enough.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Demolition

Demolition (Crush/Smash) are defending in a 2/3 falls match and we cut to the back where the Harts say they’re a bit surprised. They promise to win the titles because they are two Harts beating as one (always loved that line). Bret and Smash start but Neidhart comes in to knock an interfering Crush outside. Smash gets taken down into an armbar but knocks him away without much trouble, allowing Crush to come in instead.

Crush pulls a crossbody out of the air and slams Bret down but charges into a boot in the corner. It’s off to Neidhart vs. Smash, with the former getting kicked in the back by Crush (that cheater). A clothesline out of the corner gives Neidhart a breather and he hands it back to Bret, which seems rather quick after Bret took a good bit longer beating.

Everything breaks down and Demolition is sent into each other so Crush falls outside. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two on Smash, with Crush dropping a leg for the save. With Neidhart down on the floor, the Demolition Decapitator finishes Bret for the first fall at 6:19.

Bret and Crush start the second fall and a choke shove drops Bret fast. The neck crank goes on for a bit but Bret is back up with the Hart Attack clothesline (minus the whole Hart Attack thing). The hot tag bring in Neidhart (despite Crush holding Bret’s leg) for the house cleaning on Smash. There’s the powerslam for two and everything breaks down with the Hart Attack hitting Smash.

Crush DIVES over and grabs the referee, who he carries around the ring. Believe it or not, yes that is a DQ and we’re died up at 10:40 (total). Why in the world wouldn’t you just break up the cover there? That doesn’t exactly make Crush look smart but Demolition was never the brightest team.

The third fall begins so here is Ax to hide underneath the ring like a villain should. Bret comes back with a sunset flip on Smash, followed by Neidhart powerslamming Bret onto him (that was awesome) for two. Then we get to the “REALLY?” part of the match as Ax switches with Smash (ignore the referee WATCHING HIM COME OUT FROM UNDER THE RING) and starts hammering away. Even when I was three years old, I never got how this was supposed to make sense (Smash’s face paint was even wiped off and Ax’s was fresh).

Smash comes back out to double team Bret but cue the Legion of Doom to pull Ax from under the ring and break up another Demolition Decapitator. Neidhart slingshot shoulder blocks Crush into a cradle from Bret for the pin and the titles at 15:50 in one of the all time great feel good moments.

Rating: B+. A lot of this is nostalgia but I LOVE this match and always have. What I didn’t get when I was a kid was that this was the culmination of a years long quest for the Harts to get the titles back and prove that they could do it without Jimmy Hart. The win felt like it meant something (Vince’s call is perfect as you can feel him get happy on saying THREE) and it still holds up to this day. Heck of a match, but this was more about the emotion and it worked great.

Wrestlemania VII ad. I can still remember the phone number.

The Legion of Doom is happy because they have been waiting on Demolition. What a rush….for them. The Harts come in and say they’ll fight anyone anytime anywhere no matter the odds. Quite the emotional burst there.

Sean Mooney is outside of Demolition’s locker room where you can hear them ranting and raving about the Legion of Doom.

Queen Sherri brags about her win over Sapphire and laughs off the idea that there were “early sightings” of her earlier today. Sherri: “WHAT IS SHE: A UFO???” On top of that, Sherri has heard rumors about Sapphire that makes her think Sapphire might be the smartest person around here. Sherri: “THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!”

Five minute intermission, thankfully without the countdown graphic included.

Gene Okerlund runs down the rest of the card and we see one of Bad News Browns’ Harlem sewer rats.

Damien, Jake Roberts’ snake, is in the shower.

Big Boss Man, who is guest referee for Brown vs. Roberts for no explained reason, doesn’t mind snakes or rats.

Nikolai Volkoff, now very pro-America, is glad to be in a tag team with Jim Duggan. Volkoff describes Duggan as his idol and calls the team the American Express (as opposed to the Orient Express you see).

Earthquake, with Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart, is ready to crush Hulk Hogan for good, just like he did to Tugboat. He might as well crush Big Boss Man as well! Bravo promises to take care of the Boss Man while Hart promises a double stretcher job. Earthquake also brings up Tugboat asking fans to send Hogan cards and letters to make him feel better.

1. That was designed to replenish the WWF’s mailing list.

2. Each fan reportedly got a note signed (well, “signed” but close enough) by Hogan thanking them for their prayers.

3. That’s brilliant, and it’s the same thing the WWF did when the Islanders dognapped Matilda a few years earlier.

Jake Roberts is ready to turn Bad News Brown into a mouse.

A good chunk of these promos were not on the home video, likely for time.

Jake Roberts vs. Bad News Brown

Big Boss Man is guest referee and the fight starts before he gets to the ring. Jake tries a very early DDT but Brown slips out and kicks Jake down. Another DDT attempt doesn’t work and they head outside, where Brown hits him in the ribs with a chair. That’s good for a warning from Boss Man and Brown stomps away back inside. Roberts fights back with the snap jabs and the fans are already wanting the DDT. Brown counters it a third time, which Piper attributed to an oily head. More pounding on the floor ensues and that’s enough to get Brown disqualified at 4:48.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as it felt like a match they advertised and then forgot to do anything which, which didn’t make it much better. Throw in the Boss Man as the tacked on referee and there was only so much to get out of something like this. It just wasn’t very good and I’m not sure what they thought they had here.

Post match Brown goes to drop a leg on Damien but Boss Man makes the save. Brown beats on Boss Man but Jake grabs Damien and clears the ring, sending Brown out of the WWF for good. The rats were never seen, save for a closed crate at ringside.

Demolition rants about the numbers game in their match and swears vengeance, first on the Legion of Doom and then on the Harts.

It’s time for Brother Love, who scared the heck out of me when I was a kid (and in modern times, scares me for entirely different reasons). Love asks if kids remember being told what to do when they were younger. Now they still need someone to do that because they are soft and weak. His guest is the man who can tell you what to do so here is Sgt. Slaughter. Er, make that DRILL Sgt. Slaughter this time.

Slaughter has been looking around and wants to find a great American. That’s what he has found here, which is why he has The Great American Award for Brother Love. That makes him think of Nikolai Volkoff, who suddenly loves America. Slaughter isn’t happy with that and declares war on Volkoff, because America has gone soft. If Saddam Hussein (or “who’s on” as Slaughter pronounces it) declared war on us tomorrow our boys would be destroyed. Saluting ensues, as we have a new top heel.

Mr. Fuji and the Orient Express are ready for their match but we cut to Gene Okerlund, who has found Sapphire….who goes into a room and locks the door behind her. Nice one Gene.

Orient Express vs. Jim Duggan/Nikolai Volkoff

Piper doesn’t quite buy the idea of Duggan and Volkoff being that bright. Before the match, Duggan and Volkoff belt out God Bless America, because of course they do. Duggan says God bless the troops and the Express attacks, only to be knocked outside without much trouble. The villains come back in with Tanaka bouncing off of Volkoff (Piper: “Yep, real dumb.”). The US chants are on as Volkoff shrugs off a shot to the throat and brings Duggan in to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Express is sent into each other, setting up the three point clothesline to finish Tanaka at 3:22.

Rating: D+. This was little more than a debut squash for Duggan and Volkoff and that is fine, though seeing the Express lose so quickly despite having some awesome matches with the Rockers was a little weird. It wasn’t bad for a match there to play off of current events but it was fine for a quick one. As long as the WWF doesn’t think Duggan and Volkoff are a big deal, it doesn’t mean much.

Dusty Rhodes can’t get into Sapphire’s dressing room and has to go to the ring for his match. He’ll be back.

Sean Mooney, standing on a ladder, talks to Randy Savage, who thinks the rumors about Sapphire are true. Savage talks about how the Founding Fathers weren’t thinking about people like Dusty when they talked about the American Dream and this is a grave situation. Speaking of graves, the ring is where Macho is going to bury Dusty so DOWN THAT AISLE! Savage was kind of feeling it here.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage

This is Macho King (with Queen Sherri) and Dusty is as serious as he has been in his WWF run. Hold on though as here is Ted DiBiase (with Virgil) on the platform to say his money can buy anyone or anything. He brings out Sapphire with a bag full of money (the trip around the world and the Cadillac seem more valuable, though I’d love one of those WWF gym bags) and talks about how money will get you whatever you want.

Dusty goes after them but Savage jumps him from behind. They head inside and the fight is on, with Dusty getting in some shots of his own. Savage is knocked outside and hides behind Sherri, who sneaks him the loaded purse. One shot is enough to knock Dusty cold for the pin at 2:14.

In the back, Ted DiBiase, Virgil and Sapphire leave in the limousine, with Dusty Rhodes giving chase to no avail. That always made me sad as it was a rare instance of evil flat out winning and Dusty not being able to do anything about it.

Hulk Hogan and the Big Boss Man are ready for revenge on Earthquake. They dedicate the match to Tugboat and quite the beating that goes with the match.

Earthquake vs. Hulk Hogan

Jimmy Hart, Dino Bravo and Big Boss Man are here too and make no mistake about it: this is the show’s real main event. Feeling out process to start and we get the big shove off out of the lockup. That does not great for Hogan and far better for Earthquake, with Hogan dropping backwards. After a quick chat with Boss Man on the floor, Hogan slugs away and tries a slam, only to hurt his back (it worked in the Andre match).

Some right hands and chops stagger Earthquake (and drop Bravo/Hart) until a big right hand puts Earthquake down. Everyone heads outside where the seconds get involved, including going inside. A double big boot drops Bravo and another one knocks Earthquake into the ropes as Piper wonders what the referee is thinking. The referee gets Boss Man out so Bravo and Earthquake can hit a double slam on Hogan.

The big elbow gives Earthquake two and we hit a Boston crab, which is quite the visual. Hogan tries to power out but for once gets smart and grabs the rope right next to him (you could tell things were different in 1990, as Hogan using a ROPE to escape is just hard to fathom). Bravo gets in a slam on the floor but Earthquake misses another big elbow. The slam still doesn’t work for Hogan as Earthquake crashes onto him for two more to bang up the ribs even more.

We hit the bearhug (required) but Hogan fights out and tries…..a crossbody???? What the heck man? Either way, Earthquake powerslams him down and hits the Earthquake. Then he does it again and I think you know what that means. The comeback is on, complete with the slam working this time. There’s the legdrop but Bravo offers a distraction and Hart comes in to jump Hogan. Everything breaks down and it heads to the floor, where Hogan slams Earthquake onto (not through) a table and that’s enough for the count at 13:12. Hogan jumping up and down in celebration always looked weird.

Rating: C+. I love Hogan but the magic was starting to fade. You can tell that there is a lot going on here to try to keep the energy up, but Hogan just isn’t as special as he once was. At the same time, the countout was lame and while Hogan slammed him, it was hardly some big win. They build Earthquake up very well, but there is only so much that can be done when he’s Hogan’s rebound feud.

Post match the beatdown is on with Earthquake choking Hogan. Boss Man hits Earthquake in the back with a metal stool and just annoys him, allowing Bravo to come in as well. In a great visual, Boss Man whips out the nightstick and is ready to go, which is enough for Earthquake and Bravo to bail. Hogan poses (after suggesting that Earthquake is a chicken) but Piper doesn’t think Hogan won anything with the countout. Two things.

1. Piper getting on Hogan just feels right.

2. I know it’s for the house show rematches, but dang that countout always felt kind of lame.

Rick Rude, now short haired and serious, promise to win the WWF Title in the cage tonight and get his statue outside of the Spectrum next to Rocky Balboa. Bobby Heenan explains the idea of a cage match and promises no sequels. Rude: “And there ain’t gonna be no rematch!” I didn’t know that was a Rocky reference until YEARS later. Of note: Heenan started this promo by saying “he’s going to get that Intercontinental Title back”, which is the kind of thing that he would be saying because he could do more than one thing at a time.

Dusty Rhodes is fine with Sapphire taking the money because he offered up his innocence to her and she paid him back in scorn (he used that line a lot in his career and I’m still not sure I get what it means). Now the fans are asking when he’s going to get mad and even. He’s coming for Ted DiBiase because….America can give him shelter from the storm? Ok then.

Lord Alfred Hayes explains how the cage is built for the main event.

Hulk Hogan talks about how there are new buildings being built around the world and they are all earthquake proof. Hogan is going to take that big fat dude (his words) around the world and beat him over and over until he is the #1 contender. That’s not how you usually become #1 contender. Anyway, Hogan has a fourth demandment: believe in yourself. For now though, he going to get a new nine foot surfboard (or gun as he calls it) and go to the beach to chase sharks, at least until he finds that TITLE wave. Then he pretends he’s on a motorcycle and rides backwards out of frame. Hogan was a weird dude.

With welts on his back, Earthquake promises that it isn’t over with Hulk Hogan and promises more pain next time. Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart rant a lot too.

Ultimate Warrior: “Do you know what Bobby Heenan has in common with the Liberty Bell? One is cracked and the other is a ding dong.” Would that be Ding or Dong? A lot of Founding Father references are made with Warrior promising to beat Rick Rude. The idea of the match is that Rude beat Warrior back at Wrestlemania V (which is never mentioned by name) so he could do it again here. In short, it didn’t work and this is a really lame main event as a result.

WWF Title: Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

Rude is challenging in a cage and they start fighting on top of the cage. Warrior knocks him down and hits a top rope ax handle to take over, setting up the ram into the cage. Another ram into the cage drops Warrior and Rude goes up, where he has to kick Warrior away. For some reason Rude comes back down and keeps stomping away but it’s too early for the Rude Awakening.

Warrior knocks him down but the splash hits knees, allowing Rude to hit the Rude Awakening. For no adequately explained reason, Rude goes up to the top of the cage for a right hand to the head. He STILL won’t cover so he goes up again (Heenan: “WHERE ARE YOU GOING???”) and gets punched out of the air this time.

Warrior goes for the door and gets it slammed on his head for two, as this just keeps going. Rude goes for the door as well but gets pulled back in, with the tights coming down in the process. This time Warrior pulls Heenan in and knocks him down, followed by an atomic drop out the door. Some clotheslines into the gorilla press lets Warrior escape (complete with hip swivel) to retain at 10:01.

Rating: D+. Not only was it a completely nothing match, but it was a match that didn’t stick around for very long. In this case that might be a good thing though, as Rude was a lame duck of a challenger as you could have. There was no one for Warrior to face and it showed badly, making this a pretty weak main event. It might have worked as a quick house show main event, but (allegedly) headlining Summerslam? Not quite.

Warrior celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Nostalgia plays a big role in this one but it’s actually a rather good show. They keep things moving and important things take place, including Hogan’s return and two title changes. It’s still the very tail end of the Golden Era and now things can move forward into the new era. It’s not a classic show, but it is a lot of fun and certainly memorable (at least for me), which is something I’ll take every time.

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Supertape 4
Host: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes, Bobby Heenan

It’s time for another in this series and that could mean just about anything, as this series likes to stretch the definition of “super”. You never know what you’re going to get on this thing, though I’d assume on some wrestling from the WWF. Other than that, it could be quite the variety of quality so let’s get to it.

This is presented in the most complete form, which is a weird thing for a home video.

Opening sequence, which is likely just a preview of what we’ll be seeing.

Sean Mooney is tasked with delivering the master tape of Supertape 4 to Coliseum Video and he has a cooler, van, driver and tour guide. The van is labeled with a piece of paper and the driver is Lord Alfred Hayes…who doesn’t let the food or driver inside. Hayes already doesn’t know where they’re going but the cooler is left outside.

Mr. Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, has the Intercontinental Title back and insists he is perfect enough to beat the Texas Tornado.

From West Palm Beach, Florida, December 12, 1990.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado

Perfect, without Heenan, is defending. Tornado tries to slug away to start but takes too long taking off his robe, allowing Perfect to knock him outside. Tornado pulls him outside as well and gets in some shots of his own before throwing Perfect back inside. That means Tornado can throw him right back outside, as Tornado doesn’t have the clearest strategy. Back in (again) and Tornado hammers away before grabbing the Claw…on the stomach. With that broken up, Perfect grabs the sleeper until Tornado powers into the corner.

Tornado misses a charge into the post though and Perfect pulls a turnbuckle pad off. A quick Tornado Punch sends Perfect outside but another one hits the post by mistake. Back in and Perfect sends him into the post for two but the PerfectPlex only gets two. Tornado gets the Claw so Perfect pulls the referee in, only for the Tornado Punch to connect for a delayed near fall. Back up and Tornado hits another Tornado Punch….but NOW the referee calls for the DQ at 7:45. What a ridiculous ending.

Rating: C-. Perfect was trying here but there is only so much that can be done when Tornado is in this kind of shape. Tornado was clearly not right out there, which was becoming an issue more and more frequently. The guy looked great, but it didn’t matter if he couldn’t have a coherent match most of the time. Throw in a screwy ending and there was only so much to be done with this.

Post match Tornado sends him into the exposed buckle for the big spinning sell.

From New York City, New York, January 21, 1991.

Koko B. Ware vs. Tito Santana

This is a very rare face vs. face match and even Heenan thinks this will be good. They shake hands and then go to a lockup to start, with Heenan saying that his Family could have a better match. An armdrag takes Ware down and Santana does it again as they’re certainly in first gear so far. Santana snapmares his way out of a hammerlock and actually suggests a hair pull. A shoulder block into an armdrag puts Ware down and they seem to be getting a big agitated.

We get an exchange of shoves (Heenan: “I LIKE IT!”) before Ware punches him in the face as things get a lot more aggressive. They go outside where Ware sends him into the post before going back inside to hammer away. Ware slugs him down and drops an elbow for two, setting up the nerve hold. Some snap jabs have Heenan rather pleased, with Mooney thinking Ware might belong in the Heenan Family. The top rope fist drop misses though and Santana makes the comeback. They both miss clotheslines but Santana hits the flying forearm for the pin at 10:10.

Rating: C+. This was so strange to see and oddly enough, it worked well. Ware knows how to work this style and Santana is as good of a face as you’ll find, but dang this does doesn’t feel right in the WWF. I’ll take something going this way for a change though, as it was cool to see a fresh take on a match instead of more of the same.

Believe it or not, Hayes is lost.

We look at wrestlers who have gone from wrestling to broadcasting (From The Mat To The Mike), including Gorilla Monsoon, who talks about making the transition and promises to be around more often.

Roddy Piper gets a look as well and insists he is NOT retired. He makes some jokes about Vince McMahon and Roddy Piper before saying it’s better to not get beaten up.

We also have Gene Okerlund, which is an excuse to show his match with Hulk Hogan against Mr. Fuji and George Steele.

Finally Randy Savage talks about going against the best of all time and giving everything he had. Naturally he’s as intense as a broadcaster as he was as a wrestler.

The van has engine trouble.

From West Palm Beach, Florida, December 12, 1990.

Undertaker vs. Tugboat

This is the Fan Favorite match, meaning someone actually requested to see it. We’re VERY early in Undertaker’s time as he still has Brother Love as his manager. Undertaker slugs away to little effect as Tugboat shoves him back. An exchange of shoulders doesn’t go anywhere so Undertaker tries a leapfrog but Tugboat just stops, resulting in a knee to the head instead.

Back up and Tugboat elbows him down, which is quite the big deal for Undertaker at this point. Another elbow drops Undertaker but Tugboat misses the elbow drop. Undertaker hammers away but misses a charge in the corner, with Tugboat falling down as he tries a slam. Some shots to the back have Tugboat down again but he’s back up with a powerslam. A kick to the face rocks Undertaker again but Tugboat misses a charge in the corner. Undertaker’s top rope forearm to the chest is good for the pin at 5:43. Mooney: “What a great match this turned out to be!” LIAR!

Rating: D. I was a fan when I was a kid but my goodness Tugboat was HORRIBLE. He was big, he was slow, and those are his good points. Other than that, Tugboat just did not have anything to offer in the ring and that was on display here. Things would get a bit better when he would turn into Typhoon, but this was not a good time for him whatsoever.

From Savannah, Georgia, January 29, 1991.

Shawn Michaels vs. Crush

Marty Jannetty and Mr. Fuji are here too. Crush pounds away to start and blocks a sunset flip. Michaels hammers back and hits a flying shoulder but the kickout sends him flying outside. Back in and Michaels goes simple with a front facelock, which Crush powers into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.

A torture rack dropped down into a backbreaker keeps Michaels in trouble, followed by the required bearhug. With that broken up, Crush switches over to a bodyscissors but misses a top rope knee drop to leave them both down. Fuji gets on the apron as Crush catches Michaels, only for Jannetty to add a high crossbody to knock Michaels onto Crush for the pin at 7:19.

Rating: C+. Crush was little more than a monster for Michaels to slay here, as you could see Michaels’ singles star power trying to break through. That’s a great sign for his future and he is getting better before your eyes at this point. It’s no surprise that he is getting this kind of a singles push and it was working well enough.

Hayes and Mooney work on the van, with Hayes using Mooney’s jacket to clean up. They know the problem….but don’t know how to fix it.

From Huntsville, Alabama, January 7, 1991.

Mr. Fuji/Orient Express vs. Legion Of Doom

For some reason Fuji starts for the team but then switches out with Kato, while also playing pass the salt. Animal shoves Kato around and then does it again for a bonus. With that not working, Kato slaps him in the face and gets a chase going, allowing Kato to strike away back inside. Tanaka comes in and gets knocked down, where it’s time for a meeting with his cohorts.

Back in and Tanaka teases going after Hawk, who growls him away. Hawk fights off a double teaming and Kato bails out to the floor, where Animal picks him up for a gorilla press toss back inside. A running clothesline puts Kato on the floor again though and Animal clotheslines him there as well.

This isn’t going so well for him at the moment. Animal runs Tanaka over so Kato offers a distraction, with the salt to the eyes taking Animal down. That has Animal in trouble for all of a few seconds before he clotheslines his way to freedom. Hawk comes back in clean house and the Doomsday Device finishes Kato at 8:00.

Rating: C-. There was only so much you could get out of this kind of a match and there was no way around it. The LOD more or less squashed them here, with even the salt not being able to do much. That was part of the problem with the LOD: you could only put so many teams against them and that was the case at this point, as they didn’t have much in the way of competition.

And now, Gourmet Cooking Tips with the Bushwhackers. We start with a salad, which is thrown everywhere, then the mashed potatoes, which has a special ingredient, then broccoli, which results in bodily function jokes, and then walnut surprise cake, which is shoved into faces. We also get a flashback to Gene Okerlund becoming a Bushwhacker in the first Supertape thanks to some Bushwhacker Buzzard. Back in the kitchen, an apple goes into Okerlund’s mouth and the Bushwhackers want him for dinner. This was about ten minutes of not funny.

Hayes says he knows a good repairman and Mooney shows us to a profile on the Big Boss Man.

Boss Man talks about being the law and order around here and promises us three matches.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, September 16, 1990.

Earthquake vs. Big Boss Man

Jimmy Hart is here (minus the megaphone for some reason) with the non-Canadian Earthquake. They take their time circling each other to start and finally lock up, with Earthquake shoving him hard into the corner. For some reason Hayes finds this hilarious, though it might be Earthquake doing the posing. Back in and Boss Man does his weird bouncing headlock before punching him into the corner.

Boss Man gets powered into the corner but knocks Earthquake down, followed by chasing Hart around the ring. Earthquake misses a charge into the corner and gets low bridged down for two, only for Earthquake to hit him in the throat. Boss Man gets sent into the corner so Earthquake can sit on him, which doesn’t go well.

Back up Earthquake wins a slugout and an atomic drop has Boss Man in more trouble. Boss Man gets up with a shot to the back of the head and a kick to drop Earthquake, setting up the running clotheslines. That means Earthquake gets tied up in the ropes, but Boss Man goes after Hart and an invading Dino Bravo. Earthquake gets out and hits him in the back, setting up a big elbow for the pin at 10:04.

Rating: C+. I liked the match, but it’s a bit weird to see Boss Man losing in a match designed to be part of his profile. That being said, it was a good brawl, as Boss Man was always good at slugging it out at someone bigger than him. It worked very well against Vader and this was a similar enough idea.

Post match Earthquake goes after him again but Tugboat makes the save.

From Syracuse, New York, November 20, 1990.

Bobby Heenan vs. Big Boss Man

So Heenan has spent weeks insulting Boss Man’s mother so it’s time for payback. Before the match, Heenan brings out a Hulk Hogan wrestling buddy (that’s worth some cash these days) as a gift to Boss Man’s mother, along with roses that he has already sent to her. Boss Man comes to the ring and shoves the wrestling buddy into his face. Heenan gets in a shot with the microphone so Boss Man hits him with the nightstick for the win at 31 seconds.

Post match Haku comes in and gets beaten down just as fast. Boss Man handcuffs them together but Mr. Perfect runs in to go after Boss Man as the other two leave. That’s broken up as well and Boss Man clears the ring, with Mooney declaring it a “great matchup.” Again, LIAR!

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, November 25, 1990 (I believe, as I’ve seen multiple dates and locations for this one).

The Barbarian vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man slugs away to start and hits a big boot, followed by a running elbow to send him outside. Back in and Barbarian strikes away for a change, only to get clotheslined out to the floor. Barbarian gets back in but has a big boot blocked, allowing Boss Man to hit the running crotch attack against the back. That doesn’t last long as Barbarian knocks him down for some ax handles to the back.

The bearhug goes on for a good while but Barbarian lets it go. The middle rope elbow misses for Barbarian though and they slug it out, with Boss Man doing his always rather awesome “out on his feet” selling. Boss Man kicks him in the head and grabs a hot shot for two but can’t hit a piledriver. Instead Barbarian backdrops him down…and right into a sunset flip to give Boss Man the pin at 11:18.

Rating: C. There is something cool about the way Boss Man sells and it was working again here. At the same time, Barbarian continues to be the perfect choice for a spot like this as he can make someone like Boss Man work but doesn’t lose any status whatsoever in defeat. This wasn’t anything special, but it could have been far worse.

Post match Haku runs in to help Barbarian with the double team. And no one makes the save. What a great way to wrap up a profile.

Mooney pulls up his pants to cross a stream. Hayes uses the footbridge about twenty feet away, which Mooney somehow didn’t notice.

From Huntsville, Alabama, January 7, 1991.

WWF Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is challenging. They take their time to start until Slaughter takes him into the corner and chokes/kicks/hammers away. Warrior kicks right back though and a right hand sends Slaughter over the top, with his massive chin getting caught on the bottom rope (that’s a new one). Back in and Slaughter gets knocked out to the floor again, this time allowing Warrior to send him back inside for the hard chops.

Slaughter manages to knock him outside and send him into the timekeeper’s table before hammering away back inside. A catapult into the corner gives Warrior a breather though and a double clothesline puts both of them down. Slaughter grabs a backbreaker for two and puts on the camel clutch, with Warrior getting to the ropes for the break. Warrior Warriors Up, hits a flying shoulder and drops the splash to retain at 9:57.

Rating: C. Yeah you could only expect so much out of a match like this, as it was a dark match from a TV taping to send the fans home happy. The problem with that is there was only so much joy to be found in a Warrior match. He was mere days away from losing the title to Slaughter, so it was almost weird to seeing him win clean like this.

Mooney and Hayes realize they’re walking around in circles. Hayes walks off on his own, presumably leaving Mooney to die in the woods.

Overall Rating: C-. These compilations can be a lot of fun, but at the same time, they can also be rather dreadful. Unfortunately the latter was the case here, as nothing on here was worth seeing, with even the profile on Boss Man only being so good. Total waste of a tape, which fits the era rather well.

 

 

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WWF Rampage 1991
Hosts: Sean Mooney, Gene Okerlund, Bobby Heenan
Commentators: Lord Alfred Hayes, Sean Mooney, Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Jim Neidhart, Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

We’re still on the WWE Vault with another Coliseum Video, which should make for a bit of fun. These things are the definition of hit and miss but we can often see something good in there somewhere. Then again there can also be some drek to get through as this isn’t the best time for the company. Let’s get to it.

We’re on a golf course with Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan giving us some tips. Gene says his handicap is Heenan, who almost looks like a clown and thinks they’re about to play tennis.

From Fresno, California, June 18, 1991.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. British Bulldog

Perfect, with Coach (gah that didn’t work), is defending. Bulldog wastes no time in shoving him down and easily wins an exchange of shoulders. After a breather on the floor, Perfect is smart enough to not go for a test of strength. Bulldog accuses him of being a chicken, which Hayes does not think is the British way. For some reason Perfect tries a test of strength and immediately screams “AH YOU SON OF A B****!”

Even commentary has to cover for that one, thankfully with Bulldog getting two off a rollup. They trade sunset flips for two each and Bulldog gets in a bunch of rams into the corner on various turnbuckles. Perfect is back up with a shot of his own though and we slow back down for a breather. A Boston crab, with a grab of a rope, has Bulldog’s back in trouble but he powers out anyway. Perfect’s nice dropkick sends Bulldog outside, where Coach gets in some rather lame stomps.

Cue Bret Hart to chase Coach off so Perfect hits the Hennig necksnap but the referee almost gets bumped. After a bit of chastisement, Perfect goes with the sleeper and gets a pair of arm drops. That’s enough to make Bulldog fight up and he crotches Perfect on top, naturally with a hilarious sell. The referee gets bumped though and Bulldog can’t get a count off a small package. Coach comes in so Hart cuts him off and counts the pin because he’s a bit nuts at the moment. Hart and Perfect get in a fight and the referee sees it for the DQ at 9:32.

Rating: C+. Nice enough stuff here and that shouldn’t be surprising given who was in there. These two are talented stars who can have a good match with anyone and they had a bit of time here. That being said, the ending felt like a bit of an escape hatch and having Hart counting the pin was just kind of nuts.

Post match Hart beats up Perfect even more but Bulldog isn’t overly happy.

Gene hits a shot which seems to be good, though there is nothing in the way of tips. Well other than where to send a postcard to request a fan favorite match.

From New York City, April 22, 1991.

Warlord vs. Texas Tornado

Commentary argues over which of these two is smarter and….yeah all hail the Warlord. They take their time to lock up and then stop to pose some more, with Warlord not being happy at not being so popular. We get the test of strength and Tornado goes down for a two count, which you don’t see very often. Tornado fights up and blocks a big boot, setting up the Tornado Punch.

For some reason Warlord doesn’t even go down, instead grabbing a bearhug. That’s finally broken up so Warlord knocks him to the floor, which Monsoon says is Tornado taking a break. Warlord drives him back first into the post and they come back in, with Tornado not being able to make a sunset flip work. The slow forearms to the back have Tornado in trouble, to the point where he can’t pick Warlord up.

Warlord misses….we’ll call it a splash so Tornado is up with the clothesline comeback. The Tornado Punch gets two with Warlord getting a foot on the rope. Tornado gets a sleeper but they crash out to the floor for the double countout at 9:18. Ignore Tornado being back in before the ten count, to the point where even Heenan thinks he made it.

Rating: D. Oh heck no as this was rather horrible with Tornado being pretty much useless. It’s a bad sign when Warlord is carrying the whole thing and then they had the lame finish on top of that. This was one of the worst matches I’ve seen in a good while and it somehow just kept getting worse.

Post match Tornado argues with the referee, probably asking where he parked his chicken.

From New York City, June 3, 1991.

Animal vs. Paul Roma

Before the match, Roma and Hercules have a coin toss to determine which one will face Animal, which might be slightly interesting if Mooney’s voiceover hadn’t said it would be Roma. Hercules just stays in the ring at the bell and distracts Animal so Roma can hammer away. They actually trade leapfrogs until Animal catches Roma with an atomic drop. A headbutt between the legs keeps Roma in trouble but he knocks Animal off the top to the floor.

Back in and Roma hammers away, setting up a rather high dropkick. Three straight backbreakers set up a top rope shot to Animal’s head as this is more one sided than you might think. Animal fights up and they trade reversals until the referee gets bumped. A flying shoulder hits Roma for no count so Hercules gets in a cheap shot. Roma accidentally missile dropkicks Hercules though, allowing Animal to grab a powerslam for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: C-. This was in the weird non-Hawk period for the Legion Of Doom and that isn’t the most memorable stretch of time for a reason. There wasn’t much to see here other than Animal winning a glorified handicap match, which thankfully didn’t last long. Roma’s dropkicks looked good at least.

It’s back to the golf course, where Gene explains the importance of a chip shot. Gene’s shot goes fairly well while Heenan’s club goes flying. They move on to a shot from a bunker, with Heenan advocating cheating while Gene hits a nice shot. Heenan cheats anyway and Gene is aghast. Finally we move on to putting, with Heenan cheating again to succeed, which has Gene stunned.

From Fresno, California, June 18, 1991.

Big Boss Man/Rockers vs. Nasty Boys/Mountie

In case you wanted the most 1991 match possible. Jimmy Hart is here with the villains and the Nastys are the Tag Team Champions. Knobbs holds up one of the titles in an early Ric Flair impression. Shawn, with his backwards neon green hat (again, 1991) starts with the Mountie but Shawn tags in Boss Man, who gets taken into the corner by Sags (for the first contact over two minutes in).

A fairly delayed powerslam plants Sags right back down Mountie comes in and gets spinebustered, with the villains being cleared out for a needed breather. Back in and Boss Man enziguris Knobbs so Jannetty can come in with a middle rope faceplant. A sunset flip gives Jannetty two and it’s back to Shawn for the superkick. Boss Man adds an elbow to the face and does that weird bouncing headlock of his.

Sags finally gets in a cheap shot from the apron and Boss Man crashes out to the floor so the villains can finally get control. Sags drops some elbows and Mountie’s elbow to the jaw gets two. To avoid being left out, Knobbs drops an elbow of his own for two more before taking Boss Man into the corner. The Rockers are drawn in, which is enough for the triple teaming to continue.

Mountie confirms his identity by shouting “I AM THE MOUNTIE!”, which is enough for Boss Man to fight up. Shawn comes in to clean house as everything breaks down. In the melee, Shawn intercepts the megaphone and knocks Knobs out, only to get shocked by Mountie’s shock stick. Not that it matters as Jannetty steals the pin at 10:12.

Rating: C+. This got better near the end but the heat segment didn’t last very long, meaning there was a lot of other stuff to cover the rest of the time. What helps here is the lineup was interesting enough that it gave for some nice options, which is the point of a six man tag. It’s not a great match but it’s perfectly fun for this kind of a spot.

From New York City, New York, June 3, 1991.

The Dragon vs. Smash

Sure why not. Demolition was done at this point and Smash was waiting for a new gimmick. The Dragon was Ricky Steamboat without being able to call him Ricky Steamboat because his divorce was really nasty (and ridiculous). Smash works on the arm to start but you know Steamboat is fine with doing something just like that. Back up and Steamboat has to skin the cat (of course) before sending Smash over the top.

Smash gets back in and is quickly armdragged into an armbar as Steamboat is quickly checking his boxes here. Some chops to the head (or about four inches in front of his head) have Smash in more trouble and we’re right back to the armdrag into the armbar. Back up and Smash gets something like a chokeslam to cut Steamboat down and a belly to back suplex gets two, with Monsoon really not being pleased with the technique.

The neck crank goes on for a bit before Smash sends him outside again, this time for a ram into the post. A slam on the floor and a backbreaker back inside sets up another neck crank, which he switches into a sleeper to keep Steamboat in trouble. Steamboat finally fights up and strikes away, setting up a dropkick to the floor. A middle rope dive to the floor takes Smash down again but he suplexes Steamboat back inside. Smash misses a charge though and the high crossbody gives Steamboat the win at 10:17.

Rating: D+. Oh come on what else were you expecting here? Steamboat can do something good with just about anyone but he needs something more than a bored Smash, who is barely a singles star in the first place. This did not work and was boring on top of going longer than it needed. If you have someone as talented as Steamboat, find a better way to use him.

From Green Bay, Wisconsin, May 7, 1991.

Jake Roberts vs. Barbarian

Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, stalks him around to start and Jake’s left hands don’t do much good. An armbar doesn’t get Jake very far so Barbarian hammers away, at least until a knee lift takes him down. The threat of the DDT sends Barbarian bailing to the floor and we stall for a bit.

Back in and Barbarian pounds him down again, with Heenan getting in some choking. A backbreaker gives Barbarian two and he seems to rip at Jake’s face for a change. Jake’s short arm clothesline misses and Barbarian kicks him in the face, only for Jake to bounce back with a DDT. Cue Earthquake for a distraction so Jake busts out Damien and chases him off….for the countout at 7:27.

Rating: C-. Well, at least it was a bit shorter. This tape has hit a wall with the last two matches and I’m not sure I can see that getting much better. Barbarian is a prime example of someone who played a role perfectly well despite not being a big star. He was doing it again here, but Jake Roberts can’t beat the Barbarian in a match like this? That’s quite the stretch.

Bobby and Gene are seemingly off the course in an attempt to find a ball. Naturally, Bobby cheats again because that is his nature.

From London, England, April 24, 1991.

Greg Valentine vs. Haku

Oh come on. This is from the dreadful Valentine face run and he grabs a headlock to start. An atomic drop into a running elbow to the head sends Haku outside for a needed breather. Back in and Haku kind of bobs and weaves a bit before chopping away in the corner. Some backbreakers give Haku two and we hit the reverse chinlock.

Valentine fights up but gets caught in it again, only to fight up again (it worked the first time). Some rams into the buckle have Haku staggered, which has Vince a bit surprised on commentary. Piper: “Go after him Gregory!” The big elbow misses though and Haku strikes away again, only to get headbutted between the legs. The Figure Four attempt is blocked but Valentine grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C. This is a good example of a match that was technically fine but….who in the world was wanting to cheer Valentine? It’s just a weird idea and something that never exactly worked. That was on display here and while the match was ok because both of them are talented stars, it’s hard to get behind eternal heel Valentine, even against someone like Haku.

From Tuscon, Arizona, May 28, 1991.

Power & Glory vs. Orient Express

Slick and Mr. Fuji are here for a rather rare heel vs. heel match. We get a fairly long staredown to start until Hercules shoves Kato down to start. It works so well that Hercules does it again but Kato chops away in the corner. Hercules isn’t having that and blocks a whip out of the corner, only to miss an elbow. A gorilla press works a bit better on Tanaka as it’s weird to see the fans cheering for Power & Glory (at least more than they’re cheering for the Express).

Roma reminds the fans that the team is evil too and by coming in for a double clothesline. After some nice leapfrogs, Roma drops Tanaka again and hits a nice top rope elbow for two. Kato gets in a cheap shot though and comes in with an elbow to the face as things slow back down. Roma fights out of a chinlock but gets tripped by Fuji, giving us the threat of a manager brawl (actually….Slick vs. Fuji could be awesome).

Hercules gets drawn in so Tanaka can jump over Kato and onto Roma’s back for two. Roman jumps over a double clothesline and Hercules comes back in for his own double clothesline despite the lack of a tag. A heck of a dropkick to Kato gives Roma two and Tanaka’s sunset flip gets two more. Slick low bridges Kato down to the floor though and everyone goes outside for the double countout at 8:28.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match here, but dang it was more weird than anything else. Power & Glory fit into the good guys slot (albeit by default) pretty easily here and I could go for seeing them do it a bit more. That being said, I still want to see Slick vs. Fuji, as that just sounds fun. As in what a lot of this tape has not exactly been.

Back to the course, with Heenan lying to another player about where his ball went.

And now, At Home With Paul Bearer. After taking a very long time to get inside, Bearer is messing with a body in a casket, because he had to bring some of his work home. He apologizes for not tidying up and then sits down in something of a throne. Bearer offers us a drink, which might be made of human remains. He looks at some knickknacks, such as the Urn, a dead plant and a skull, plus a guillotine. This was pretty much little more than The WWF Addams Family and it wasn’t any good.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, June 2, 1991.

Undertaker vs. Ultimate Warrior

Paul Bearer is here with Undertaker. Warrior cleans house to start and hammers away, only to get his neck snapped over the top rope. Back in and Undertaker grabs Warrior by the face, which was a big thing for him back in the day. This goes on for far too long, with Warrior powering out after nearly three minutes of Undertaker just holding his face. Warrior fights up but gets knocked down again, only to avoid the big running elbow. Another comeback is cut off and Undertaker hits a quick Tombstone but Warrior pops up. Then Undertaker hits him with the Urn for the DQ at 7:44.

Rating: D-. Warrior did pretty much nothing here other than surviving the Tombstone but then the match just ended before anything else could happen. It isn’t a good sign when so much of the match was spent with the Undertaker just standing there with his hand over Warrior’s face. Pretty horrible match here, and probably the only reason this tape was uploaded in the first place.

Post match Undertaker and Bearer load up a body bag but Warrior fights out and clears the ring.

Heenan and Gene argue over who is paying for the golf and a golf cart chase takes us out.

Overall Rating: D+. There are a few passable matches early on in the tap to carry things but this just falls apart after the six man tag. It’s a pretty sad day when you have Greg Valentine vs. Haku as a high point for the second half of a nearly two hour tape. While there are worse tapes out there and this did have a nice variety (with no Hogan anywhere to be seen), but dang the match quality is just not there to back it up. Find something else to watch.

 

 

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Saturday Night’s Main Event #28
Date: October 13, 1990
Location: Toledo Sports Arena, Toledo, Ohio
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

It’s time for Oktoberfest because…well you don’t need an excuse for Oktoberfest. That makes it a theme show and therefore we could be in for some rather terrible jokes. Those will be on top of what could be some less than great action, as this isn’t the most thrilling time in the company’s history. Let’s get to it.

We open at Oktoberfest with wrestlers running around and thankfully we have all kinds of lederhosen.

Vince and Piper welcome us tot he show in front of some green screen and run down the card.

Opening sequence and dang that song still rocks.

Demolition is ready to demolish the Ultimate Warrior and the Legion of Doom. The team just did not feel special with Crush involved, even if he was kind of perfect for the spot.

The Legion Of Doom is ready to party at Oktoberfest and ask what Demolition is going to do about losing the Tag Team Titles. Cry in their beer? Sob in their schnitzel? The Ultimate Warrior comes in to shout about blitzkrieg. I would have put him as more of a Konnan guy.

Ultimate Warrior/Legion Of Doom vs. Demolition

The good guys clear the ring in a hurry but we settle down to Crush clotheslining Animal. A powerslam plants Smash for two and it’s off to Warrior to run Ax over. The Warrior Splash misses though and Crush gets in some cheap shots on the floor to really take over. The beating is on but Hawk breaks up the Demolition Decapitator. Hawk comes in for the top rope clotheslines as everything breaks down. It’s back to Warrior for the running clotheslines and the splash to finish Smash at 5:37.

Rating: C. As tends to be the case with Saturday Night’s Main Event, this was more of a “send the fans home happy in a hurry” match, with the good guys getting in some trouble before coming back for the win. Warrior was clearly floundering as champion as the best they had for him was just a six man tag here. He has nothing to do and that played a big role in why his reign as champion went so poorly. At the same time, it’s still a shame that we never got a big LOD vs. Demolition match, as this would have been the perfect place.

We go to Oktoberfest and where Gene Okerlund introduces us to some of the wrestlers, all of whom are in some rather amazing costumes. Alfred Hayes is drinking and complaining about the beer not being as good as the English version.

Randy Savage vs. Dusty Rhodes

Savage has Queen Sherri with him so Piper compares him to over kings, including his dog. Dusty is fresh off losing Sapphire to Ted DiBiase but he does have his son Dustin in the front row. Savage gets distracted by an Ultimate Warrior poster and gets whipped hard into the corner. A slow motion backslide gives Dusty two so Sherri offers a distraction, allowing Savage to hit a knee to the back. The chinlock goes on so Sherri slaps the mat, which feels a bit backwards.

Cue Ted DiBiase and Virgil to buy the front row seats so they can sit there alone. Only Dustin won’t take the money so DiBiase and Virgil sit next to him, making quite the visual. Dusty fights up but DiBiase pulls Dustin back down, which has Dusty going outside after him. We take a break and come back with Savage choking away before getting two off a cheap shot. The over the top rope neck snap lets Savage go up for the ax handle to the head and another near fall.

Dusty fights up and sends him into the buckle before knocking Savage off the top. A headbutt of all things puts Savage down as DiBiase talks trash to Dustin. The villains finally beat Dustin up on the floor, which is basically assaulting a fan but security is nowhere to be seen. Savage is tied in the ropes and Dusty finally sees what is going on, only for Savage to ax handle Dusty into the barricade for the countout at 8:18.

Rating: C-. There was only so much that Savage could do here and that was part of the problem with Dusty’s time in the company. He could do the talking and the segments, but at some point you can only get so far with what he can do in the ring. Then DiBiase and Savage kept beating him so there was only so much of a chance anyway.

Post match Dusty tries to cover Dustin from the beating so DiBiase and Virgil beat on Dusty instead.

Hulk Hogan and Tugboat are ready to make Rhythm and Blues play the flugelhorn and the glockenspiel in an Oompah band (1990 was WEIRD) so they can get to Earthquake and Dino Bravo. Somehow this turns into a D Day story with Hogan promising to give Rhythm and Blues a “Barbarian Creaming”. For some reason Hogan and Tugboat talked way more about Earthquake and Bravo than the team they’re facing tonight. This was strange even by Hogan standards.

The Bushwhackers practice cutting cheese. This is a Vince McMahon segment if I have ever seen one.

Alfred Hayes is starting to like the British beer and tells stories about being on the Danube.

Hulk Hogan/Tugboat vs. Rhythm and Blues

Hogan wastes no time in cleaning house and drops some elbows. Honky Tonk Man is sent into Tugboat’s boot in the corner before Tugboat comes in to crank on Valentine’s arm. Hogan goes aerial for a middle rope ax handle to Valentine’s arm but an elbow to the head staggers Tugboat. The bearhug slows Honky Tonk Man down but Valentine makes the save so the villains can take over.

Valentine’s elbow to the head gets two and Honky Tonk Man adds some weak knees to the back. Tugboat shrugs off the lame offense and brings in Hogan to clean house. A clothesline and right hands have Valentine in more trouble and the big boot sets up…nothing as Earthquake and Dino Bravo come out for a distraction. We take a break and come back with Tugboat coming in for a headbutt. Jimmy Hart offers a distraction though and Honky Tonk Man hits Tugboat in the back with the guitar for the DQ at 7:23.

Rating: D+. Oh come on. Honky Tonk Man or Greg Valentine can’t lay down for the legdrop? I get not wanting to lose to Tugboat but give me a break. This was a perfect choice for a match where Hogan can get a win but instead it’s this lame DQ, which does nothing but feel like a waste of time

Post match the villains beat Hogan down and Earthquake hits an assisted splash. Earthquake loads up the Earthquake but Tugboat makes the save with the guitar. Vince: “What would they have done to Hulk Hogan?” What the heck do you think they were going to do?

Back to the festival for the sausage stuffing contest (oh dear) with Honorary Sausage Stuffer Hall Of Fame inductee, the Genius. It’s Jim Duggan/the Hart Foundation vs. Mr. Fuji/the Orient Express. Fuji is accused of cheating (with a pre-made sausage) so we go to Alfred Hayes for a ruling but he’s drunk and telling stories. Again, this was a Vince McMahon segment if there has ever been one.

Intercontinental Title: Haku vs. Texas Tornado

The Tornado is defending, having beaten Mr. Perfect at Summerslam, leaving Haku to try to bring the title back to the Heenan Family. An early attempt at the Claw sends Haku bailing to the floor for some advice from Heenan. Back in and Haku grabs a chinlock to slow things down but Tornado slugs away. Haku knocks him into the corner and hits a headbutt but the Claw goes on to cut things off. The Tornado Punch retains the title at 3:10.

Rating: C. It’s easy to see why Tornado got chance after chance as he looked great and the fans were into him but the backstage issues were just too much to overcome. There was only so much that can be done when he has that many problems and they caught up to him in a hurry. This was the quick title defense for Tornado and that’s why you bring in Haku.

Hulk Hogan and Tugboat use a bunch of sailing terms as I try to figure out what in the world the appeal of Tugboat was really supposed to be. I remember liking him as a kid, but egads he does not hold up whatsoever.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Koko B. Ware

Slaughter has General Adnan and is ready to start the biggest push of his career. They start slowly until Ware snaps off some armdrags and dances, which is just not going to work for an American hero. Ware misses a charge into the corner though and the pace slows way down. An elbow drop gives Slaughter two but he misses a shot, allowing Ware to hammer away. That’s broken up and the Atomic Noogie (thankfully not officially called that) finishes Ware at 5:09.

Rating: C. They were late in the show at this point and there was no reason to think that this would be anything more than Slaughter slaughtering Ware. Slaughter was going to be the big heel and while that isn’t exactly the best fit, there wasn’t anyone else to get the spot. He’s fine, but tying into a real world story is quite the questionable move.

Post match the Iraqi flag is waved but Nikolai Volkoff pops up to wave the American flag.

Back to the festival for a dance off between Jim Neidhart and Slick (who is far better). Then a food fight breaks out. Didn’t we all know that was coming?

Ultimate Warrior says Queen Sherri is no challenge and she has only enraged the legion of warriors. He accepts the challenge from Randy Savage and the title match is on.

Sherri and Savage promise to win “that belt”.

Vince and Piper wrap it up.

We go back to the festival where Alfred Hayes yells at Gene for not calling him, as his earpiece was taken out while he was drinking. Hayes berates him so Gene hits him with a cake.

Piper wants to go to the food fight, which is still ongoing.

Overall Rating: C-. This one is going to depend on your nostalgia taste, as the wrestling is pretty terrible, but the Oktoberfest stuff is so goofy that it’s hard to not at least chuckle. Yes some of the jokes are horrible, but that’s kind of the point of the whole thing. The company was in a bad place at this point and it’s not a good show, though it was fun in a very (very) goofy kind of way.

 

 

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Supertape II
Host: Sean Mooney
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon, Hillbilly Jim

It’s another Coliseum Video and another that I’ve seen more than a few times. This is from around 1990 and is the usual collection of house show matches and special features. In other words, it’s something that I can go for on any given day and there is a good chance that this will be fun. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney is in the studio and welcomes us to the tape, featuring a rundown of what is coming. On top of that we get a kind of spooky vice saying SUPERTAPE, which appears to be our theme for the tape. Uh, right.

From Chattanooga, Tennessee, January 3, 1990.

Jim Duggan vs. Randy Savage

Sherri is here with Savage and this is from Saturday Night’s Main Event, albeit with different commentary. Duggan isn’t having any of this waiting around and jumps him to start, with Savage taking quite the fall on the floor. Savage gets knocked down but comes back with a clothesline, as Duggan just stands there so Savage can hit him (that wasn’t good). They go outside with Savage knocking him around but the camera stays on Sherri and…..eh fair enough.

Back in and Savage misses a charge but Duggan misses an elbow to even it back up. Duggan knocks him to the floor, only to stop and glare at Sherri, allowing Savage a rather long breather. Back in and Duggan drops a knee for…well nothing as Sherri distracts the referee again.

Duggan knocks him outside again (ok we get it) but Sherri gets in a rake to the back and we’re clipped (as there was a commercial on the original broadcast) to Duggan knocking Savage out of the air. Sherri slips in the loaded purse though and Savage knocks him silly (well sillier) for two. The three point clothesline sends Savage to the floor so Duggan suplexes him back inside, only for Sherri to trip Duggan down. Savage puts his feet on the ropes for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: B-. These two were having a good match as Duggan knew how to turn his incredibly basic offense into an entertaining spectacle. Sherri was a good foil on the floor as well and of course Savage can work well with anyone. It wasn’t like Duggan was ever going to be the top star, but dang the fans got behind him when they were given the chance.

Post match Duggan hits Savage with the board to blow off some steam.

We get a profile on the Rockers, starting with a promo from the two talking about the teams they have fought in their two years in the WWF. They’ll take on anyone and they play as hard as they work.

From New York City, New York, January 15, 1990.

Rockers vs. Powers Of Pain

Mr. Fuji is here with the Powers Of Pain. Barbarian shoves Shawn across the ring to start in quite the nice power display. For some reason Shawn’s high five to Marty doesn’t count as a tag so Barbarian gets to shove Shawn around a few more times. A shoulder puts Shawn down again but Marty comes in for the save to take over. Shawn comes in off the top to get in a shot on the arm, followed by a double superkick.

A double clothesline drops Warlord and we get some Rockers posing as the villains take a breather. Back in and Warlord slowly hammers away, only for Marty to dropkick him into a hurricanrana. Warlord hammers Marty back down and a heck of a powerbomb drops him again. A rather high backdrop gives Warlord two and it’s off to Barbarian for a jumping headbutt to the back. Fuji even gets in a cheap shot from the floor, with the distraction having Shawn teasing a punch to the referee.

We hit the bearhug (you knew that was coming) but Marty fights out and hits a middle rope shot to the face. Barbarian is back with a powerslam to plant Marty, only to miss the middle rope elbow. The tag brings in Shawn to clean house, including an assisted sunset flip for two on Warlord. Everything breaks down and Barbarian it set into Marty, leaving Fuji to cane Shawn. Barbarian drops the elbow for the pin at 9:58.

Rating: C+. This was a power vs. speed match and that is always going to work, but at the same time, it was a weird choice for the Power Of Pain to win in a profile about the Rockers. That’s not exactly a great way to go, but the Rockers did get to do some of their usual fast paced stuff. Maybe just do that with a match where they actually win?

Post match Shawn dropkicks Fuji and gets laid out. Marty gets taken out s well, with something like a top rope Hart Attack. Shawn finally gets a chair for the save.

The Rockers introduce another match because they’re tag team specialists.

From Rochester, New York, June 28, 1989.

Rockers vs. Greg Valentine/Dino Bravo

Jimmy Hart is here with the villains. Marty and Bravo start things off with Bravo grinding away on a headlock. Shawn comes in off a blind tag to dropkick Bravo into Marty’s slam though, setting up Marty’s dropkick which doesn’t seem to come close. That means a breather on the floor before valentine comes back in to hammer (naturally) on Michaels. That’s broken up and Marty comes in to take over on Bravo.

A monkey flip has Bravo in trouble but he knocks Marty down, allowing Valentine to hit a double stomp. Marty gets a double elbow to the face but manages to kick the Figure Four attempt off. Valentine isn’t having the comeback though and knocks him down, setting up an elbow for two more. Marty finally fights his way out and brings Shawn in to quite the reaction as the comeback is on.

A suplex gets two on Valentine and Hart gets knocked off the apron. The double dropkick hits Bravo and the double top rope fist drop gets two as Valentine makes the save. Shawn and Bravo collide for a double down and Valentine puts Bravo on top for two. Marty comes back in and gets an O’Connor Roll but Valentine hits a clothesline so Bravo can get the pin at 11:40.

Rating: B-. This picked up near the end and that was nice to see but it did go a good while, especially with a thrown together team like Bravo and Valentine. That being said, again, you might want to give the Rockers a win rather than finding new ways for them to lose. It’s not like the Rockers were some terrible team who never won anything so there should be a lot to choose from for the profile.

Post match Ronnie Garvin, a referee feuding with Valentine, comes down to say Valentine cheated and the decision is reversed. Call it a big win I guess?

A fan wants to see Hercules vs. Akeem. Since she doesn’t like Akeem’s dancing, Akeem won’t talk to her, but Hercules is happy to have her support.

From Portland, Maine, August 30, 1989.

Hercules vs. Akeem

Slick is here with Akeem, who bails as Hercules swings his chain. Akeem dances around and knocks Hercules into the corner, only for Hercules to rain down some right hands. Hercules knocks him out to the floor and we’re already hitting the stall button. Slick gets knocked down and Akeem has to hold him back, which has Hayes almost losing it on commentary.

Back in and they tease a boxing match, with Akeem’s gyrating not really working. Some left hands and a wind up right hand stagger Akeem but a slam isn’t going to happen. Hercules hammers away again and we go to some weird camera shot with the corners cut off. A running knee and a clothesline both put Akeem down…but Slick low bridges Hercules for the DQ at 5:00.

Rating: D+. This was a case where they did what they could and that was only going to get them so far. Ultimately, there isn’t much that Hercules can do with Akeem because Akeem is just that big. That leaves you with Hercules punching him for about three minutes and then getting a knockdown but since they can’t do anything else, they have the lame finish. It’s not a good match, but they did about as much as they could, including that awesome Akeem dancing.

Post match Akeem goes for the splash but Hercules rolls away and hits the big slam. Now why couldn’t they just do that for a finish?

We get a Call Of The Action segment, meaning Alfred Hayes watches clips of an Orient Express squash and names some moves. As in things like “forearm” and “leapfrog”, or if you want to get really technical, a “knuckle blow” or “jump karate kick”. And yes, he does go over the names twice in case you missed them. Ignore Hayes switching from “jump karate kick” to “karate jump kick” in a segment about getting the names of moves right and talking about THE SAME MOVES.

The Orient Express, with Mr. Fuji, are ready to hurt Demolition. Especially Ax for some reason.

From New York City, New York, March 19, 1990.

Demolition vs. Orient Express

Gorilla talks about how Demolition is in line for a possible three peat as Tag Team Champions, which he has never seen before. Not only has he seen it, but he saw it with Mr. Fuji, who is here with the Express. Smash wastes no time in punching Tanaka down and it’s off to Ax to crank on the neck.

Sato comes in and gets whipped into the corner as Gorilla talks about Fuji being a two or three time Tag Team Champion (it was five), including with Professor Tanaka, with whom he held the titles three times. So Gorilla remembers the team, knows that Fuji was a multiple time champion, but not that it was a three peat. Bobby Heenan would never do that. Tanaka comes back in and gets knocked down again, setting up a backbreaker for a quick two.

Ax comes in to stay on the arm but it’s back to Smash, who gets karated up against the ropes so the villains can take over. Fuji must have helped them with his completely forgettable tag team experience. We get some kind of cheap shot from Tanaka, which the camera completely misses, leaving commentary totally confused at what happened. Fuji gets in a cane shot and the beating continues, to the point where Ax comes in to hammer away and blow off some steam.

Ax trying to come in again lets the Express get in some more double teaming, which consists of hitting Smash a few more times. That’s broken up with a single clothesline out of the corner though and it’s Ax coming back in to clean house. A powerslam gets two on Sato as everything breaks down. Fuji breaks up the Decapitator with another cane shot and Sato adds some salt to the eyes for the countout at 10:57.

Rating: C. Demolition loses to the Orient Express less than two weeks before getting the Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania? In theory that would set up a title rematch down the line, but dang that’s a weird way to treat the #1 contenders so close to a major match. This was only ok anyway, as Demolition never felt like they were in any real danger and mainly shrugged off all of the chops and kicks.

From New York City, New York, March 19, 1990.

Rick Martel vs. Bret Hart

Same show as the previous match and this should be a bit better. Martel knocks him into the corner to start but Hart is right back up to knock him to the floor, allowing Monsoon to talk about the “external occipital protuberance”. Back in and Martel misses a charge into the corner, allowing Hart to work on the arm a bit. The armbar goes on as Monsoon thinks these two are going to do rather well with the ladies.

A backslide gives Hart two and we’re right back to the armbar. As Hillbilly Jim tries to figure out where he would fit in over in Europe (Hayes doesn’t think it would work), Martel leverages Hart out to the floor. Jim accepts that he can’t go due to the lack of possum pie as Martel can’t pose due to the banged up arm.

A suplex brings Hart back in and we hit the abdominal stretch to give Monsoon an opening to complain about the lack of a leg hook. Hart gets in his own suplex into a backbreaker for two and Martel needs a breather on the floor. Back in and Hart hits a dropkick but he doesn’t have the Sharpshooter yet so it’s a stomp to the ribs for two instead. Martel bails to the floor and it’s a time limit draw at 12:02. The full match runs about 22 minutes so that’s a heck of a trim job.

Rating: B-. I could go for seeing the whole thing as they were having some good chemistry out there. Hart was clearly getting a look for a rather eventual solo run, even if it was over a year away at this point. What mattered here was letting Hart show what he could do and Martel was a great choice to make that work as he really was that talented.

Post match Hart beats him up again.

We get a profile on Slick, who talks about how he is the greatest of the great. This means a quick montage of Slick dancing and cheating, set to the still outstanding Jive Soul Bro. That’s not much of a profile.

From New York City, New York, December 28, 1989.

Rick Rude vs. Roddy Piper

Inside a cage, with a new rule of being able to win via pinfall. They start fast with Rude being sent into the cage as commentary is surprised by the idea of a referee in there. Piper whips away with a belt, setting up an atomic drop to keep rude in (amusing) trouble. Rude is sent into the cage as it’s all Piper so far. Piper goes up but gets cut off (with his trunks coming down) by the rather bloody Rude.

Some forearms keep Piper down but he’s fine enough to pull Rude back in, with the tights coming way off to bring up the blurred image. Back in and Piper hammers away but gets caught in a quick Rude Awakening. Rude can’t follow up though as he’s still blinded by the blood in his eyes (and the blur on the upper half of his tights, only for Piper to almost get out as a result. They both go up and fight on top of the cage before climbing down on the outside.

A double ram into the cage lets them come crashing down and they hit at the exact same time (we need Jesse Ventura to say one of their legs were straight). The match must continue, so Rude hits him with a chair and they go back inside, where hopefully Rude will pull hits freaking tights up already. Rude goes to the top of the cage and hits a top rope fist drop, leaving Piper vibrating in what looks like a Hogan impression.

That’s only good for a rather delayed two so Rude goes up again, only to get crotched down on top. Piper goes for the door but Heenan slams it onto his head, allowing Rude to hit a belly to back suplex. Heenan throws in some brass knuckles but Piper takes them away and knocks Rude out, allowing him to go through the door for the win at 12:53.

Rating: B+. These two worked very well together and they had a heck of a match here, with both guys beating the fire out of each other. It felt like a big blowoff between the two of them, which is what a cage match at MSG should be. You don’t see Piper getting big wins like this very often but dang did it worth. Check this out if you want an old school cage match between two legends.

And now, Bloopers, which are totally not staged in any way. This includes a bunch of scenes of Monsoon and Heenan at Busch Gardens, which don’t feel like bloopers as much as them doing their usual stuff. It also goes on way too long, with one of the only highlights being Monsoon dressed as Brother Love for Halloween.

From New York City, New York, February 19, 1990.

Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect/The Genius

Perfect actually takes Hogan down to start and sends him outside, only for Perfect to stomp away as he comes back in. Hogan gets in a shot of his own though and it’s off to Beefcake for a double noggin knocker on the floor. Back in and a right hand gets two on Perfect and Hogan comes in for the back rake (villain).

Beefcake’s high knee connects and commentary talks about golf for some reason. They go outside though and Perfect gets in a shot with Genius’ metal scroll, followed by a ram into the barricade. The fans are RIGHT THERE to cheer for Hogan and it’s Genius coming in for some rather dainty rakes to the back. Hogan fights up and hands it off to Beefcake for the running knee on Perfect, followed by the sleeper. Genius gets in a scroll shot though, allowing Hogan to chase him to the back (Hillbilly: “That’s right, you better run.”).

Hogan has to run back to break up a VERY slow count as Genius is back on the apron. Heenan asks Jim about horseshoes as Genius rakes Beefcake’s eyes, allowing Perfect to come back in. The slow beating continues with the referee not seeing the tag to Hogan, allowing Beefcake to get knocked back into the corner. Hogan breaks up the PerfectPlex and gets the tag to start cleaning house. Everything breaks down and the big boot into the legdrop finishes Genius at 15:10.

Rating: C-. Long, dull match here with the heat segment on Beefcake feeling like it was going on forever. The fans were into it though and that helps, but this needed to be about five minutes shorter to really work. Heenan needling Hillbilly on commentary was funny but that’s about the only high point for the whole thing.

Post match Genius is put to sleep and gets some more of his hair cut.

Mooney wraps it up and finds out that it was….the sign guy who was messing with the spooky SUPERTAPE deal. That’s stupid.

Overall Rating: B-. There are some bad spots in here, but for the most part this worked rather well. It’s a good era for the company with all kinds of star power and the cage match is definitely worth a look. The main event needs some work but other than that and Hercules vs. Akeem, nothing on here is bad. Check this one out if you get the chance as I had a fun time with some nice flashbacks.

 

 

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WWF’s Hottest Matches
Host: Sean Mooney
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes

This is another Coliseum Video from the WWE Vault and of course I’m going to give it a shot. It’s one of those compilation tapes that was thrown together, often from dark matches with some commentary added. In other words, there is a grand total of no telling how good this might be. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney welcomes us to the show and gives us a quick rundown. This seems to be from late summer to fall 1990.

From Glens Falls, New York on April 4, 1990.

Rick Martel vs. Tito Santana

Apparently Heenan is wearing Arrogance and Monsoon isn’t a fan. What would a gorilla know about smelling nice? Santana takes Martel up to the ropes to start and messes with his hair a bit, which can’t be fair. Martel tries to go after him for a change and gets hiptossed, followed by some dropkicks to send Martel bailing to the floor, where it’s time for some jaw rubbing. Back in and Martel sends him face first into the buckle but misses a running knee. Santana starts in on the leg with some cannonballs down onto it, followed by some general cranking.

That’s broken up with some choking on the mat, which sets up some choking in the corner. Back up and Martel’s leg gives out on a leapfrog so Santana wraps it around the post (what a hero). The Figure Four is blocked, with commentary arguing (as only they can) about which leg Santana should be spinning.

Santana fights up and sends him face first into the buckle seven (not ten, but seven) times. Martel misses a middle rope spinning crossbody and the flying forearm sends him crashing out to the floor. The referee gets in Santana’s way so Santana shoves him down, meaning it’s a shot of Arrogance to the eyes to give Martel the pin at 9:40. Heenan to Monsoon: “YOU OWE ME DINNER!”

Rating: B. What is there to say here? Two talented wrestlers with a history had a good match, with the villain cheating to win. That’s always going to work and it was a perfectly fine story. This felt like a case where they were told to go do something and it went well, which shouldn’t be much of a surprise. The surprising part is that they never got a big blowoff, though it was scheduled for Summerslam 1990 until Martel got hurt.

We get a history of the WWF Tag Team Titles, starting with Demolition winning the titles from Strike Force at Wrestlemania IV, with Alfred Hayes talking about the aspects that come together to make a successful team. In short, they need to work well together. That’s the British analysis that makes wrestling seem so simple. Granted in this case Demolition cheated by using Mr. Fuji’s cane so it’s even more basic than it seems.

Then we move on to the Colossal Connection beating Demolition to win the titles at the end of 1989.

Then Demolition got the titles back at Wrestlemania VI. For some reason Hayes describes this as an “unprecedented” third reign, which is just wrong. Heck, their former manager Mr. Fuji was half of the first team to do it!

Then the Hart Foundation won the titles at Summerslam 1990. There is no mention of Crush being added to Demolition as he’s just kind of there now. That being said, the pop for the Harts winning the titles is one of the best ever and something I’ll still throw on for the sake of a smile.

So this whole thing was just a recap of the last two and a half years of the titles, with the Brainbusters’ title reign only being mentioned in passing.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada on June 17, 1990.

Orient Express vs. Rockers

This should be good and Mr. Fuji is here with the Express. The Rockers start fast and send the Express into each other, setting up stereo hiptosses. The stereo dropkicks don’t happen though as Marty throws a right hand instead, though we’re probably lucky he remembered to put on his boots.

We settle down to Tanaka cheap shotting Michaels to start but Michaels twists on the arm to cut that off. Marty drops a splash on the arm before they trade leapfrogs, only for Marty to take him down by the arm again. Another cheap shot lets Sato come in off a non-existent tag and work on Marty’s arm for a change. Ever the good referee, Danny Davis won’t let Marty throw a punch, allowing Sato to pull him down by the hair and switch with Tanaka without a tag.

Back up and Marty manages to ram them into each other and then start in on Sato’s arm for a change. Michaels grabs a neckbreaker and, yes, works on the arm again. Marty comes in and gets kicked in the back of the head to take him down. A superkick sends Marty outside and of course Fuji is right there with a cane shot, like all bowler wearing managers should be. Back in and Sato kicks him in the head for two and Tanaka does the same for the same.

The chinlock goes on and despite Marty’s arm laying on the rope, the referee doesn’t break it up. This guy might not be very good at his job. The slow strikes set up another chinlock until Marty fights up for a sunset flip. Ever the good partner, Tanaka is right there for a save before even a one count. A clothesline finally gets Marty over for the tag and house is quickly cleaned. Everything breaks down and they fight to the floor, with only the Rockers beating the count back in at 12:08.

Rating: C+. Well it wasn’t great and they’re definitely capable of doing better, but these teams worked well together and that was the case again here. Even when they were doing something as basic as working the arm and a lot of chinlocks, they were moving around well enough to keep me interested. Not one of their best, but I’ll take it for a house show match.

And now, a fan favorite match!

From Niagara Falls, New York on June 27, 1989.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Greg Valentine

Dusty wins a shove off to start before Valentine works on the arm. An elbow to the head gives us the TIMBER fall from Valentine, who needs some help from Jimmy Hart on the floor. Back in and Rhodes strikes away with as much speed as you would expect, only to miss the big elbow. Valentine’s elbows to the head work rather well and we hit the chinlock. Back up and some more shots to the head wake Rhodes up, to the point where he scores with a dropkick.

Right hands and chops put Valentine down but Rhodes can’t get his terrible Figure Four. Valentine slowly hammers away and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Rhodes fights up again and, again, hammers away until he runs into a knee in the corner. Hart tries to go up top but referee Ronnie Garvin isn’t having that. Rhodes gets what can generously be described as a rollup for the pin at 10:07.

Rating: D. If this is a Fan Favorite match, I’d like to sign up for an Enemies Hate match as it has to be better. This was two guys slowly hitting each other and a bad looking cradle for the pin. I get that Rhodes was all about the talking, but you need to be able to do something in the ring to back it up and that just wasn’t the case here.

This month’s profile is on Jake Roberts, meaning we get another Hayes narrated intro.

From Binghamton, New York on June 6, 1990.

Jake Roberts vs. Akeem

Slick is here with Akeem as this is a rather tall match. Roberts works on the arm to start but gets shouldered down. The threat of a DDT sends Akeem outside (common result in Roberts matches) before Roberts gets back to the arm back inside. Akeem shrugs that off and powers him down again, with a running crotch attack to the back crushing Roberts. A missed charge into the corner…doesn’t do much damage to Akeem as he backdrops Roberts. Back up and Roberts hammers away but Slick breaks up another DDT attempt, only to get sent into Akeem for the DQ at 6:29.

Rating: C-. Well it was better than Rhodes and Valentine, if nothing else because Roberts can move around a bit faster. Akeem didn’t do much more here than the usual big man offense, but what else were you expecting from him? Slick helped here, if nothing else due to how amazing he looked in a green suit.

Post match Slick gets DDTed but Akeem cuts off the snake treatment.

Roberts talks about Ted DiBiase wanting the Million Dollar Title back and it just happens to be inside the snake bag. We see a bunch of snakes, including a rattlesnake and a cobra, who might be waiting in the bag with the title.

From Hamilton, Ontario, Canada on December 14, 1989.

Jake Roberts vs. Ted DiBiase

Virgil is here with DiBiase and they double team Roberts before and at the bell, as again the referee is just fine with all of this. Roberts clotheslines them both down and slugs away at DiBiase to take over fast. A DDT attempt sends DiBiase bailing to the floor and we slow down a bit.

Back in and DiBiase avoids another try at the DDT so we can stall some more. Virgil (whose hand is in a cast) offers a distraction which doesn’t work as Roberts sees DiBiase coming in and immediately stares at him. For the third time (we’re just over three minutes in), DiBiase bails outside to avoid the DDT. This time Roberts shoves the two of them together and chases Virgil, allowing DiBiase to get in an elbow to finally take over. DiBiase gets smart by going after the recently repaired neck with some elbows and knees to said neck.

The stalling in between has the fans rather angry, which shows you how much you can get out of actually working the crowd. The front facelock stays on the neck before DiBiase walks around a bit more. DiBiase grabs the facelock again and, after Roberts fights out, drops a middle rope ax handle to cut him off. Roberts manages a quick swinging neckbreaker and they’re both down. Back up and Roberts takes out Virgil before hitting the short arm clothesline. The DDT is loaded up but Virgil comes in for the DQ at 12:37.

Rating: C. Another slow match which would have been better with about five fewer minutes. These two should have had some great chemistry together but for some reason it just never clicked. That was the case again here and it really only kind of worked, with DiBiase taunting the crowd to some nice success but little more.

Post match the beatdown is on with DiBiase hitting Roberts with some money. Roberts fights up and drops Virgil before knocking DiBiase outside and chasing him away. The DDT lays out Virgil and we get the snake treatment.

From Fresno, California on August 9, 1989.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Haku

Bobby Heenan is here with Haku. After a minute and a half of stalling, Heenan offers a distraction so Haku can send Beefcake into the corner to start. The jumping knee and a running knee send Haku to the corner, where he bites the face to come back. Some choking has Heenan rather pleased and we hit the chinlock.

Haku chokes even more and rakes the eyes to cut off Beefcake’s weird double punches. A missed elbow lets Beefcake hit some slams and a backdrop…doesn’t exactly work and winds up as more of a flapjack. The sleeper goes on (the fans approve) but Heenan comes in for the DQ at 8:44.

Rating: C-. This was a weird one as the wrestling itself is really dull and generic (Haku was running out of ways to choke), not to mention this being the third straight match that ended with the manager coming in for the DQ. The thing is though the fans were entirely into this and wanted to see Beefcake win. It was a really basic match but the fans cared and that’s worth a lot of points.

Post match the beatdown is on but Beefcake grabs the clippers to chase them off.

We get a profile on Sensational Sherri, who does not like being called a manager. She takes care of Randy Savage’s kingdom wherever it goes, from getting him plane tickets to tasting his food so nothing happens to his perfect body. Sherri is more than a manager, because she is a woman who screeches to the top of her lungs. So there’s your profile!

From San Antonio, Texas on April 24, 1990.

Shawn Michaels vs. Ted DiBiase

Marty Jannetty and Virgil are here too. DiBiase snaps off some armdrags to start and Michaels seems to realize he might be in some trouble. Michaels grabs a headlock into some armdrags of his own, with DiBiase rolling outside as Michaels is rather pleased that it worked. Back in and a headlock takeover puts DiBiase down, where he grabs the tights for some rollups rather than just lay on the mat.

It works so well that they do the sequence again as they’re starting basic but keeping it moving. Michaels gets driven into the corner before charging into a boot, allowing DiBiase to drop the punches. Choking sets up the chinlock as commentary bickers about Virgil’s level of stoogery. DiBiase throws him outside, where Virgil gets in some slaps with money, which doesn’t seem sanitary.

Back in and a suplex gives DiBiase two and we’re right back to the chinlock (he likes that one). The falling middle rope elbow misses though and Michaels stars the comeback, with a clothesline and dropkick getting two. A high crossbody gives Michaels the same but Virgil’s trip has Marty giving chase. DiBiase throws him out like it’s the 1990 Royal Rumble but everyone brawls in the ring for a double DQ at 14:44.

Rating: C+. Oh come on with these DQ’s already. Let someone get a rollup or a fluke pin or ANYTHING other than someone coming in for the DQ. Michaels was still a tag wrestler at this point and losing to someone the caliber of DiBiase wasn’t going to hurt him. The match was good enough as you would expect but the ending was more annoying than anything else.

Post match the Rockers clean house without much trouble. The ring announcer calls it a double countout, with Monsoon losing it on commentary until it’s corrected to a double DQ.

We go to the gym for a workout with Power & Glory. They lift weights and brag about their muscles. A lot. Like quite a lot. Probably too much really. Of note: there are trees visible outside of the window. I wonder if this was filmed in Vince McMahon’s home gym.

From Huntington, West Virginia on June 26, 1990.

Randy Savage/Queen Sherri vs. Dusty Rhodes/Sapphire

Brother Love and Miss Elizabeth (the latter accompanied by Pat Patterson) are here too. We hit the stall button for a good while to start, with the men getting in an OH YEAH off. Savage holds back Love from a threatening Rhodes before the women officially get things started. Sherri’s kicks are caught and she misses a charge, with Sapphire throwing her down. Love offers a distraction so Savage can cheat a bit, earning himself an elbow from Rhodes.

Sherri’s dress comes up and Monsoon is VERY confused by what he sees. Savage bails out to the floor before coming back in and getting elbowed in the face. Love’s distraction lets Savage fight back, setting up the top rope ax handle. The sleeper keeps Rhodes down, with Sherri dropping to the apron and hammering on the mat, with even Heenan not being sure why she’s so anxious. Rhodes fights up and he punches Savage out of the air, only for Love to break it up again.

The running crotch attack misses for Savage so Rhodes goes after Love, earning himself a knee from Sherri. Love accidentally misses Sherri and they go back inside, with Rhodes grabbing his own sleeper. That’s broken up with Love hitting him with what looks like Sherri’s loaded purse. The double tag brings in the women, with Sapphire falling on Sherri for two. Everything breaks down and Savage knees Love off the apron by mistake. Sherri loads up the purse again but Elizabeth takes it away and knocks Sherri cold to give Sapphire the pin at 10:27.

Rating: B. This was an absolute blast with nothing resembling a serious match. They just had a good time with everyone doing their thing and Sherri and Love being little more than slapstick villains. Sherri did her thing and the shot at the end was great. It was terrible from a wrestling perspective but egads I had a great time with this one.

The winners leave and Sherri DOES NOT MOVE in a funny bit. She finally staggers out, stealing the show as usual.

Sean Mooney’s papers catch on fire (the running gag for the show is that the studio keeps getting hotter, which wasn’t mentioned due to reasons of stupidity) and he can’t figure out the fire extinguisher to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The opener was good and the last match helped, but dang this was a rough sit at times. There was that way too long string of disqualifications and the Tag Team Title thing felt like a waste of time. That being said, I can only get so mad at a Coliseum Video with two rather good matches, even if almost everything else in the middle was pretty much nothing. This wasn’t a good time for the company and that was on display here. If you need a sign of that, note that the Ultimate Warrior, the WWF Champion at this time, is nowhere to be found. That can’t be a good sign and this wasn’t an overly good tape.

 

 

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