Monday Night Raw
Date: February 14, 2011
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
Guest Star: Ariel Winter

The main story tonight is that we’re finding out the guest host of Wrestlemania tonight.  I’ve heard various possibilities, some of which are good and some of which are horrible.  It’s also the final push towards the PPV this Sunday which is more or less set in stone.  We may have an issue with the title match being pushed tonight as Lawler’s mother passed away earlier today so there’s no way to know if he’ll be here or on his game tonight.  That’s not a criticism mind you, merely an observation.  Let’s get to it.

We open in the arena with Cole welcoming us and talking about the guest host tonight.  No Lawler as it’s Matthews in there instead.

Orton vs. Sheamus, Morrison vs. Truth and Cena vs. Punk tonight with the last of those starting RIGHT NOW!

John Cena vs. CM Punk

 

There must be a winner to this.  During Cena’s entrance we see a clip from last week where Lawler slipped Cena a chair to keep Cena from getting destroyed.  Cena gets on the mic and thanks Lawler for helping him out last week.  He talks about how it’s Valentine’s Day and how nothing says I love you like a pair of tickets to WWE.  During this part there’s a Rocky chant.  Love isn’t the only thing in the air.  WRESTLEMANIA is in the air!

Cena talks about the guest host could be, throwing out names like Sammi from Jersey Shore, Lady Gaga and Michael Cole.  Using the clues that Vince gave last week, he proves that Cole is in a love triangle with Miz and Riley and that Michael Cole may not be a man.  More importantly though, this Sunday is the Elimination Chamber and after the year Cena has had, he needs this Wrestlemania moment.  He dealt with a group of radicals all year called the Nexus, but Sunday there’s only one member to deal with.

Cue Punk with a mic of his own.  Punk says that the record in Gray’s Sports Almanac (Love those movies) it says that the last two times they’ve fought Punk has won.  Punk says he’s a good person unlike Cena and the bell rings.  If anyone gets involved in this they’re out of the Chamber match.  Cena hits the post shoulder first and hits the floor.  Punk takes him down with a flying clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Punk getting a two count off a big kick.  If Nexus gets involved, Punk is out of the Chamber.  Punk works the arm but Cena hits an armdrag to get free.  Body scissors by Punk takes more energy out of Cena.  Cena’s shorts are a bit shorter tonight and are above the knees.  Cena fights back and gets the Protoplex and 5 Knuckle Shuffle but can’t hit the FU.

Punk takes him down with a leg lariat and we get a headscissors.  Cena is like man please and just stands up.  Back to their feet and Cena hits a gutwrench suplex for two.  Cena goes up for the top rope Fameasser but Punk makes the stop.  Corner knee hits but the bulldog is reversed into a failed STF attempt.  Swinging neckbreaker by Punk sets up the GTS which can’t connect.

CM goes up and tries a cross body but Cena rolls through into the FU.  Punk gets to the ropes though and hits the floor.  A Nexus clad arm sticks out from under the ring and hands Punk a chair.  Punk slides it into the ring and the referee goes to get it.  The arm comes out again with a wrench.  Punk drills Cena with it and the GTS ends it at 10:36.

Rating: B. Good match here especially for free TV.  The ending was a nice little touch with the two weapons being handed in.  Cena losing is good as it builds Punk up even more also.  This was one of the better TV matches I’ve seen in a good while and a great way to start Raw.  I love February Sweeps because we get stuff like this.

The announcers say that Lawler isn’t here due to the death of his mother but that he’ll be at the PPV.

We’re waiting on the guest host as we take a break.

Friday is the 600^th Smackdown.

Here’s Alberto but you already know the joke that most people make when saying his name so I’ll spare you.  He talks about destiny and Mania and all that jazz.  Cue Edge to a nice ovation.  He says that he’s been so busy fighting Ziggler that he almost forgot about Alberto hitting him with a guitar two weeks ago.  Edge says he also has a destiny and takes down Alberto.  He sets for the spear but Ricardo saves.  Alberto goes to the apron but gets speared off.

Cue Vickie who says that Sunday there will be the world title match in the Chamber but she’s here to introduce the new World Heavyweight Champion, Dolph Ziggler.  We see a clip of the illegal spear from Friday.  This week on Smackdown we’re going to have the official coronation of Ziggler as the new champion.  Edge is apparently stripped of the title and Vickie also has proof that Edge assaulted Teddy.  The segment just kind of ends with Vickie laughing.  So he’s not champion anymore?

Divas Title up next.

Another 2-21-11 promo with the song and a shot of someone’s chest.  Well it’s certainly not Trish Stratus.

Miz vs. Bryan tonight.

Divas Title: Natalya vs. Eve Torres

 

This is a lumberjill match and Natalya is in the ring when we start.  Eve grabs a headlock to start which results in a standoff with both trying dropkicks.  They slaps hands and go to the mat.  Surfboard by Natalya which is always awesome looking.  Even counters and is sitting on Natalya’s legs.  This is more of a gymnastics routine than a match but it’s fun.

Josh mentions that Natalya was voted as the dream Diva Valentine’s Day date which Cole makes fun of.  Natalya is sent to the floor and the Divas beat the heck out of her.  As retaliation Eve dives on them to take out nearly all of them at once.  Back in Natalya tries a cradle but Eve rolls back onto it for the pin to retain at 3:40.

Rating: C. I liked it.  Eve looked good out there from a wrestling standpoint and looked like she could actually hang with the “wrestling” Divas instead of just being one of the eye candy ones.  This was a pretty decent little match and ended with a wrestling move which is always a good thing.  Fun match and short enough to not get bad.

Back from a break with the Bellas getting on Eve for no apparent reason.  A brawl breaks out with Natalya trying to save.  Gail jumps in there as well and referees break it up.

Cole: “If the Divas keep this up they’re going to need chaperones.”  Oh you know what’s coming.  Also there’s a guest star tonight: Ariel Winter, apparently HHH’s costar.

Mark Henry comes down for a match but Sheamus jumps him during his entrance and beats the tar out of him.  Sheamus grabs a mic and says that’s a preview of what he’ll do in the Chamber.

Miz vs. Bryan up next.

We get a clip of the tag match from last week where Bryan and Miz got into it some.

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

 

Riley is on commentary here.  Crowd is into Bryan and we get a chant for him.  Miz takes him down with a shoulder block to start.  Josh makes a Grammys reference of all things.  Bryan grabs the arm which gets him nowhere but a dropkick does.  Miz takes Bryan down with a big boot.  For some reason we keep cutting to shorts of the commentators.  Off to a reverse chinlock by Miz.

Bryan escapes and grabs a rear naked choke but Miz grabs the ropes.  Another back elbow by Miz gets two.  Another chinlock now but the crowd is staying in this which is a good sign.  Bryan gets a corner dropkick for two.  They slug it out a bit and Miz is knocked to the floor.  Running knee from the apron sends Miz through the barricade in front of the time keeper’s area.

Back in the ring and a top rope dropkick gets two.  Good match here so far.  LeBell Lock almost goes on but Miz knocks him to the floor as we take a break.  Back with Miz hammering away in the corner but not being able to hit a suplerplex.  Instead Bryan gets a sunset bomb for a close two.  We see a replay of the neckbreaker to the floor just before the break and I didn’t realize how sick it was.

Bryan unleashes the kicks and Miz counters into a rollup for two.  Another gets two.  Miz tries a reverse DDT into a neckbreaker but gets countered into a German.  BIG kick to the head of the world champion gets two and a huge reaction from the crowd.  LeBell Lock can’t get hooked so Bryan tries a victory roll.  Miz drops him forward and then the Skull Crushing Finale ends it at 12:40.

Rating: B+. This was an awesome match where Miz got pushed and Bryan looked great.  This was exactly what Miz needs: a dominant win where most importantly he won clean.  Bryan just took the world champion to the limit and the whole thing worked very well.  Good match and the second good one tonight which is a great thing to see.

Miz gets on the mic and says that Lawler isn’t here tonight because his mother passed away.  He hopes that Lawler doesn’t use this as an excuse at the PPV.  Nice heel heat there and the catchphrase takes us to a break.

Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga vs. John Morrison/R-Truth

 

Cole says he’ll explain this came about in a bit.  Morrison has a BIG black eye.  Oh that’s from the kick last week.  During the break the GM made this match due to what happened last week.  Well if that’s the case why did he make the singles match into the first place?  It was supposed to be Morrison vs. Truth remember?  McGillicutty vs. Truth to start us off and Truth is in trouble.

Off to Otunga and he’s still in trouble.  Matthews thinks McGillicutty handed Punk the wrench earlier.  Morrison comes in and is all angry and aggressive.  I kind of like it actually.  He’s beating the heck out of both guys and kicks McGillicutty in the ribs.  Truth dives out to take out Otunga so Morrison can hit the running knee to end McGillicutty at 3:19.

Rating: C. Not bad here but the best part of it was the beating by Morrison.  Having Morrison get all ticked off and wanting to hurt Punk is something very good to see.  He needs some emotion in his character and this is a good place to start.  He could be a star with a few minor tweaks and this would work fine.  Fun match.

Truth and Morrison chase off Ryan when he tries to attack them.

There’s a plug for Jericho’s new book.

The chick from Chaperone and Modern Family is here as the guest star.  She introduces the Khali Kiss Cam.  She’s a kid mind you and dances to Khali’s music.  Khali’s belly button is above her shoulders.  The Kiss Cam tonight is of people in the audience.  Santino kisses Tamina and Vickie kisses Dolph.  Apparently they’re in the audience?  Maryse won’t kiss Ted so she kisses Yoshi Tatsu.  Ryder gets kissed on the cheek by Regal in the moment of the night.  Horny pops up with a box of candy for her and gets a kiss on the cheek.  To all the people that says this is stupid, lighten up.  This was like 2 minutes long and harmless.

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

 

Orton is introduced as the Viper now.  Randy takes him down into the corner and gets a Thesz Press with punches.  Here’s the stomp and knee drop which misses.  Naturally we spend the whole match talking about the Chamber.  Sheamus takes over with his power stuff and gets the slingshot shoulder block for two.  Orton tries to fight back but runs into a boot in the corner.

Apparently that doesn’t hurt as he hits some of his basic stuff.  Orton charges ahead but gets caught in the Irish Curse backbreaker for two.  Middle rope suplex puts Orton down but Sheamus can’t capitalize.  Sheamus comes at him but walks into the RKO for the finish at 5:07.  Punk and Nexus comes out for a beatdown but the other Chamber guys make the save and beat up Nexus.

Rating: C-. Just a match here as the big ending is clearly the guest host.  These two are more or less incapable of having a good match so keeping it short is probably the best possible thing they can do.  Not bad and the ending works with the RKO, but not enough time and nothing entertaining at all really.

A long limo pulls up and we see a woman’s feet.  Naturally the camera stays on the feet as we take a break.

Back and the host is……causing electrical noises in the arena.  There go the lights.  They’re going out all over the arena.  There goes the Tron and the Elimination Chamber sign.  Vince isn’t advertising a PPV?  This MUST be huge.  A light comes on the screen and it’s…….THE ROCK!!!!!!!!!  I’m stunned at this.  He looks like he’s in great shape.  To put it mildly, the place erupted.

After seven long years……FINALLY, The Rock has come back to Anaheim, to Raw, and Home.  When he had the mic up you could see his hand shaking.  He has many nicknames, but tonight he’s Dwayne.  It’s been a long time since he’s been here and it’s not because of money or to promote a movie but because of the fans.  The fans helped him accomplish his goals and dreams.  He wants to thank the fans and tell them he loves them and because of them he’s back in the ring and he’s never ever going away.

He says he called Vince and Vince said he needed a host that was electrifying.  He needed someone that would get the people talking.  He needed a host that would ignite things and that would be Justin Bieber.  Justin is cool, but only the Rock could be the host of Mania.  He hasn’t lost a step on the mic at all.  At the drop of a dime he’ll lay the smack down at Wrestlemania, but the question is to who.

Could it be Miz?  He says he’s heard Miz is awesome.  Rock isn’t a scientist but if you’re always saying you’re awesome it means you absolutely suck.  Rock says there is one man he’s going to see at Mania, but there’s an E-Mail before he gets to say it.  Rock isn’t pleased.  He cuts Cole off before he can answer, asking if Cole thinks anyone cares what the GM has to say.

Rock: “Michael Cole, is that what you think?”  Cole: “Well…”  Rock: “IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK!  You sit down at that table and know your role and shut your mouth!”  He says if Cole doesn’t then Rock will have some special Facebook pictures tonight of him taking that computer, shining it up real nice and putting it straight up Michael Cole’s candy face.  Now sit down because you look like a drunk hobbit.

Anyway there is one man that Rock has to see face to face.  Rock has met him before and thinks he’s a cool guy.  When Rock left this guy came in and started talking trash about the Rock.  His name is JOHN CENA.  WWE has gone from Austin 3:16 to Can Your Smell What the Rock is Cooking to….You Can’t See Me?  He does the hand motion and asks if he’s playing peek-a-boo.  A blindfolded Stevie Wonder in a basement can see you.

Everyone can see Cena.  He runs around here in colored shirts looking like a bright bowl of Fruity Pebbles.  Rock has swore about 15 times in 10 minutes.  He’ll see Cena at Wrestlemania.  He’ll also see Miz and everyone else at Mania.  Rock guaran-darn-tees three things for Mania.  He’ll show the world he’s the most electrifying man in entertainment.  At the drop of a dime he’ll lay the Smacketh Down on all of them.  Finally, the Rock and the MILLIONS and MILLIONS of Rock’s fans will electrify Wrestlemania….IF YA SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKING!!!

Wow.  I have no idea what else to say.  This was one of the best moments I have ever seen and the idea of Cena vs. Rock in any form or fashion, even talking, is breathtaking.

Massive posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: A+. This was a great show overall with two good matches, a funny comedy bit and of course the huge announcement being the thing that tied things up throughout the show.  I’m very excited about the PPV now which is exactly the point of the show.  This was a great Raw and certainly one of their better ones in awhile.  See what happens when you have good wrestling matches?  I had it at an A- until Rock came out.  Go ahead and whine.  THE ROCK IS BACK.

Results

CM Punk b. John Cena – GTS

Eve Torres b. Natalya – Torres reversed a Natalya cradle into a pin

The Miz b. Daniel Bryan – Skull Crushing Finale

R-Truth/John Morrison b. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty – Running knee smash to McGillicutty

Randy Orton b. Sheamus – RKO

Royal Rumble 2009
Date: January 25, 2009
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 16,685
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Matt Striker, Todd Grisham

There are really no differences at all between this and what you see today other than a few face and heel changes. Everyone is here for the most part other than Christian I think. Yeah there’s just not much that’s changed since then other than DX reuniting. We have five matches tonight, one of which is the new Smackdown Champion Jeff Hardy in his first title defense against Edge, although someone has been trying to get him lately.

Also we have Cena defending against JBL in the token title match of the year. Other than that it’s just the Rumble which more or less was the most predictable match in history as all of one person was mentioned at all in the buildup to it. That being said, let’s get to it.

The opening video is the standard thing of all the Rumble winners and all of the logos but it’s cut off by Orton’s music and clips of him being a bastard to the insanely hot Stephanie. Vince gets kicked in the head to stun the crowd. Yeah, they’re not making it obvious at all who was going to win here.

The slow motion replay of the kick shows that it’s INSANE. There’s no pyro for the opening as it’s all serious and stuff. In other words, the fans get cheated to a special part of the show for Vince. Oh never mind there’s the pyro. Still kind of stupid though.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Jack Swagger

Jack was the undefeated rookie here, having won the title two and a half weeks ago. This is the mostly pointless rematch. Matt gets a great pop and I wonder why he’s never been pushed harder than he has been yet. It’s a shame that Swagger is being depushed, but to be fair tonight for the Little People Court Raw he had a good match with Cena so maybe the push is back. He has no pyro yet so that sucks. We even get the big match intros here.

Since it’s 2009, Swagger is a cowardly heel at the beginning. Hardy brawls for the most part as Striker points out that he can’t out wrestle him so why try? That’s a great point at least. We get a replay of a great right hand from Matt. That was sweet. Hardy is doing really well so you know how it’s going to end in case it wasn’t clear yet. Swagger works on the arm which is the one he uses for the Twist of Fate. I know because Striker told me.

See why he’s the best in the world today? Swagger is working the shoulder really hard here and uses some unique stuff, including a boot to the shoulder. That’s something I’ve seen a few times but rarely enough that it’s effective. I’m not sure if I like or dislike the big 2 signs in the front row for counts. They always disappear after the first match so I’m guessing someone takes it from them or they get tired of it.

Striker goes way too insane by saying who the last North Carolinian to win a world title in Detroit (Steamboat in 87). That’s saying a lot. This is a good match with a lot of close calls. They’re getting some time too so that helps a lot. Hardy goes into the post as it was already hurt. Swagger hits the powerbomb for the pin to retain and let us hear his awesome music. Hardy sits on the steps with his head in his hands. Remember that for later.

Rating: B. I really liked this. It was a decent length of about ten minutes and had a ton of close calls and near falls. The arm stuff was good and it played into the ending to give it some psychology. That gives it most of what makes a great match so this is easily solid for an opener.

Orton is here and no one is talking to him. They’re making this seem like the big deal that it’s supposed to be.

Raw Women’s Title: Melina vs. Beth Phoenix

Melina is gyrating like there’s no tomorrow and it’s working very well. Beth is with Santino here but it’s getting close to the end. Santina would be debuting soon enough to suck the life out of everything again. Beth is just freaking gorgeous. I love that backflip she does to get into the ring. Santino gets a massive chant, proving that no one cares about the women and care about comedy.

Thank you Vince for crippling wrestling and making the comedy more important. Beth very clearly calls a spot to Melina and then whips her in. Beth shows off her power by lifting Melina up with one arm. That’s just freaking scary. Beth’s thong is sticking out which is of course awesome. She gets a leg lock on Melina that’s in so deep that her foot is touching her head. That can’t feel good. Beth actually pulls the leg back to ram it into her head. FREAKING OW MAN!

They botch the heck out of something as Melina is trying to come back. Melina hits an INSANE move where she spins around Beth’s side to get the rollup for the title. That was awesome looking.

Rating: C-. There were far too many botches in there but the submission thing and the ending were both cool. It was your standard Diva match so that’s not saying a lot. Melina’s selling of her back was great here though and it helped the match a lot. Not bad, but still far from great due to the sloppiness. They had a submission match soon after this.

We recap the JBL vs. Cena feud, which is mainly about the JBL and HBK feud over the money or whatever. It was stupid and one of those “real” angles that never work for me. It’s like saying Shawn makes no money from wrestling or anything like that which is just ridiculous. Being conservative, let’s say Shawn makes a quarter million a year. That’s FAR more than enough to live a decent life, but he needs to be sold to JBL to make ends meet?

Shawn more or less lays down for JBL to get the pin. The problem that plagued this at the end was that it ended way too fast. It should have been at Mania instead of No Way Out. To be fair though, that wound up being the wrong choice as Shawn and JBL did what they should have done at Mania.

We see JBL and Shawn in the back and JBL says that if he wins tonight, Shawn is a free man and paid in full and can be in the Rumble. JBL leaves and Shawn looks in a mirror for awhile and then turns around to have Taker staring down at him. He says that sometimes you have to go through a lot to get to Heaven. Yeah they did the right thing.

Ad for Mania.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. John Cena

Cena was kind of casually mentioned in the package. Until the Taker cameo, I would have believed a title change here. The crowd is split on Cena as always. I would have actually believed them going with JBL vs. Shawn, but Taker switched me to reality. The idea here is that Cena is off his game because he has to keep his eye on Shawn. For instance, they’re on the floor and Cena ducks a clothesline but Shawn is in front of him and Cena gets ready to duck the superkick and JBL gets a shot in.

Never mind that the kick would have cost JBL the match but whatever. JBL had lost a bunch of weight at this point and actually looked like he was in very good shape. He lost probably 40 or 50 pounds and actually had a stomach. Shawn is more or less stoic on the floor. There’s a Ram Jam sign in the crowd, which is the finisher of the main character in The Wrestler.

We cut to a shot of Shawn about once every 30 seconds as Cena is more or less a pawn in this, which is ok I guess as this was just another title match for him. Cena has the STFU but due to Shawn standing there he gets nervous and JBL can get out. The Clothesline hits but it just gets two. There goes the referee and we have a bad looking double clothesline spot. Oddly enough we can see the ECW announce table over Shawn’s shoulder and there’s no Todd Grisham. That’s most odd.

Shawn gets in the ring and starts tuning up the band. He kicks Cena and JBL begins his second world title reign. Yeah I don’t buy that either. Oh of course he kicks JBL. Ok he kicks Cena too. He lays JBL on top of Cena as Cole says he doesn’t get it. That might be because Cole is freaking stupid. Yeah it must be. Shawn leaves and shakes his head as Cole tries to figure out the complexity of this.

Have fun Mikey boy as it doesn’t exist. Another referee comes out and we get two. Both guys are out as Cena kicks out so it looks like he’s spooning JBL. DANG that first referee has been out for a long time. He got ran into not freaking shot. Cena gets an easy FU for the pin. Oddly enough it has no name here and was called his move by Lawler in the replay.

Rating: C. Usual stuff from these two with the focus on JBL and Shawn like it should have been. That’s ok here though as it set up the big blowoff with them next month. Like I said Cena was more or less a pawn here and that’s all he should have been. This got JBL and Shawn much further along and it worked well. The match wasn’t that good but it rarely was with these two so what are you going to do.

Buy Legends of Wrestlemania and mess with history.

We recap Edge vs. Hardy which was the result of the Stairwell “Atrocity”. Basically, it seemed like someone wanted to hurt Jeff. There was that, plus him and his girlfriend being run off the road, and him having his face burned by pyro. I went to a house show a few weeks after that and he didn’t appear because of it. I’ve never seen so many kids look so sad. Anyway, Edge denied everything as he was the obvious most likely suspect. This is Jeff’s first title defense.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Jeff Hardy

Wow. Back in 2000 or 2001 who would have thought that would be realistic? Jeff is WAY over. The celebration for him winning the title was absolutely perfect. My goodness I want to freaking shoot Vickie. Oh she’s Edge’s wife at the moment. It’s no DQ now also. Edge is flanked by Chavo. Edge gets speared as the bell rings, which is stupid as he didn’t need to since there’s no DQ. The WE WANT CHRISTIAN chant starts in about 10 seconds.

Christian would debut again in 16 days and he was already done with TNA and had made it known that he was coming back to WWE. You know the more I watch these shows, the more spots I see called by guys. I wonder if that’s just because I’ve seen a lot or if it’s because it’s becoming more of an issue with these young guys. After Jeff dominates for a bit, Chavo’s interference gives Edge the advantage.

Now we get some stupid hockey jokes after Edge slams his head into the table three times. Geez there’s another called spot. And now it’s weapons time as Edge brings in a chair which doesn’t work. While both are on the apron, Jeff hits a Twist of Fate which pretty much sucked. And there’s the ladder because Jeff is the Sabu of the WWE. Chavo makes a save but gets thrown off and jumped on. Jeff jumps off onto Edge.

I use the term jump loosely as he more or less falls and the splash turns into a headbutt. It looked ok but sloppy. Passable at least. This is the referee with the hitch in his count which is so annoying. Edge counters the Twist of Fate into a DDT which impresses JR. Why? It’s not like that move has never been countered before. That’s why it never worked as a big time move. Think of the leg drop or the Sharpshooter or the Stunner in the earlier days of it or the tombstone.

When one of those connected, it was OVER. Jeff and Edge never had one of those, which is what makes them look weak. Vickie comes out and breaks up the pin off the Swanton. Here’s Matt with a chair and you can feel it coming. The crowd just goes silent over the chair shot and the look from Matt is GREAT.

This was an awesome moment with Edge looking back and forth with an awesome what the heck just happened look on his face. The complete lack of commentary here helps a lot. Matt walks away stoically. This would lead to their two match series that sucked because they didn’t go anywhere near as insane as they could have.

Rating: B-. Not bad but not great here. They had their standard good match that went about 20 minutes. That’s all you need really at the end of the day. The real story here was of course Matt vs. Jeff which is fine as it was a great story that the matches couldn’t live up to. They went fine though here and that’s fine.

Ad for No Way Out, which is now just called Elimination Chamber.

Orton says he’s not worried about Vince. This was the start of the STUPID mental disorder or whatever it was. That could have worked if he never said he didn’t have it or whatever but the whole thing was just stupid. Jericho shows up and says good job on kicking Vince in the head.

We get a recap of all of the Rumbles which never gets old. This is the really cool one with the following stats, accurate as of coming into the 09 Rumble:

22 winners (in 21 matches, but remember Luger and Hart were co-winners)

598 competitors (this is odd as there was one match with only 20 entrants and I don’t think there are enough to knock out twelve people over the years, unless they’re counting all the times where a guy gets beaten up on the way to the ring)

36 people that Austin eliminated, a record that Kane will likely break someday.

11 people that Kane threw out in 2001 which is insane

11 consecutive Rumbles for Kane, which is awesome

1 woman ever for Chyna

62 minutes 12 seconds which is the official record I guess, even though if you listen to the commentary for the 92 Rumble Flair was in for about 70 or so, which was false.

2 seconds that the Warlord lasted.

3 times that Austin won, which is also a record

1, the number with the same amount of winners as number 30, which is insane when you think about it. Note that in the video for this they only show Shawn when talking about the number one spot.

27, which has had 4 winners (Studd, Yoko, Hart, Austin in 2001)

70 which is the percent that since 1993 that the winner has won the world title at Mania.

This was an AWESOME package that got me completely in the mood for a great Rumble.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals this year. Rey has number one and Morrison number two. If they had any idea what kind of a classic they would have in the fall they would be amazed. Rey’s mask makes him looking like a member of the Klan. Ross and Lawler are doing the commentary which just makes this feel right. One thing I like that they’ve got going here is they have a big Mania 25 logo in the corner of the arena and everyone keeps pointing to it.

Miz and Morrison are of course tag champions here. Rey does an awesome spinning move around John to get to an arm drag. Number three is Carlito. He’s a face here as he’s part of the Smackdown tag champions which would be unified at Mania. Oh no wait it was before Mania because we had to have a Kid Rock medley. MVP, just having turned face is 4th. Khali is 5th as not a lot is happening. He of course dominates the whole thing and chops the heck out of them all.

I hated the match he had with Rey when Rey was world champion. It completely killed Rey’s credibility for months. Kozlov, still undefeated and with a decent amount of heat is 6th. He drops Khali in about 5 seconds. MVP and Carlito are both out now so it’s Rey, Morrison who has been hiding and Vlady. It’s HHH at number 7 to a roar. After a facebuster, HHH throws him out with ease. Orton is 8th and it’s on.

The clock came up very fast for him as I’m assuming HHH was afraid of being in there with two good workers like Morrison and Rey. Morrison gets a 619 and Cryme Tyme come out and flip a coin to decide who gets in and it’s JTG. The clock is going WAY too fast here as DiBiase is 10th. Morrison and JTG both go over but hang on and kick at each other in a cool looking spot and then DiBiase and Rey do it and then HHH and Orton do it. That’s either cool or stupid.

Jericho is 11th. Well no one can say that they’re sticking with small stars in the opening. Despite the star power, not a lot of interesting anything is going on, mainly because it’s so clear Orton will win. Mike Knox and the beard of awesome is 12th. Knox would somehow manage to get into the Elimination Chamber next month which blew my mind and sucked at the same time. Miz is 13th.

He was about to start making fun of Cena and becoming the awesome character that he still is to this day. Morrison takes a sweet RKO and then so does Miz and JTG. He gets stopped by a Pedigree as HHH throws out Morrison and Miz while Finlay is 14th.

In a SWEET spot, Rey goes over the top to the floor but walks on Miz and Morrison to stay alive. That was awesome. How in the world are we almost halfway done with this? Rhodes is number 15. Rey gets a springboard and Orton takes him down with an RKO. The lights go out and Taker is sixteenth. Taker is on one side of the ring and everyone else is on the other. He beats them all up and throws out JTG with ease of course.

The crowd is way into him. That’s why he’s still getting pushed. Gold freaking Dust is 17th. WHY does he still have a job? He has no gimmick and is slipping in the ring. He and Cody have a showdown and Goldie beats him up. This is being written on December 23rd. My wish for Cody: that he makes 1/10 of the impact Goldust made. He’s got a long way to go. Rhodes puts out Rhodes and Orton is very proud. Punk gets number 18.

That pop doesn’t exist according to Vince as he deserves to be jobbed to Cena in less than two minutes. He won the IC Title about two weeks prior to this and the Triple Crown in less than a year. That’s amazing. Vince disagrees apparently. Yeah I’m a Punk mark, get over it. He hits GTS on HHH which surprises me. Henry, still a heel and not yet the Kool Aid Man is 19th.

The ring is WAY too full here with twelve or thirteen people in there. Shelton, the US Champion, is 20th. Punk and Jericho are on the top for some reason and Shelton does a running double Downward Spiral to them, which is called a reverse DDT by JR because he’s an idiot. Regal is 21st and he’s the guy that Punk beat for the IC Title.

Mysterio puts Henry out which is of course perfectly fine. Kofi, still not a big deal at all but getting very popular very fast, is 22nd. Taker is bleeding which I’d assume is hardway and he throws out Shelton. Kane is 23rd. Rey is upside down and hanging on in a weird looking position. Lawler counts 12 or 13 people in there. Kane and Taker hook up for awhile for a double chokeslam on DiBiase. Punk puts Regal out. R-Truth is 24th.

There are WAY too many people in there and even more just laying around and doing absolutely nothing at the moment. That’s the problem with having people last a long time in there. They’re used to ten to twenty minute matches at most so this is the equivalent of a rest hold. Rob Van Dam is 25th to an EPIC pop. The whole match stops to watch.

Something that would crack me up is if they didn’t know he was coming. He does his top rope kick to Kane who just watches it happen. I know there’s no point in having him in there as there’s no way he’ll win, but he’s a WRESTLER and a former world champion. There’s his validation. Kendrick is 26th. He manages to put Kofi out and then be thrown out in 15 seconds. Van Dam is just so ridiculously over it’s scary.

Dolph Ziggler, still meaning nothing, is 27th. He runs into Kane resulting in a quick elimination. There are at least 14 people in there and most of them are doing nothing with maybe 4 really working in there. Ross actually says they’re trying to keep up with the action. Santino is 28 and breaks Warlord’s record by being clotheslined out in 1 second by Kane who was right there. Hogan got a running start to put out Warlord which explains the time lapse.

HHH and Taker go at it which is always awesome. Jim Freaking Duggan is 29th. REALLY? This is what ticks people off about the modern WWE. Shad can’t get in there? Primo can’t? Instead we put a 50 year old jobber in there instead. Yes he’s won before but we don’t wheel Luger out to be in there also.

Big Show is number 30, so here’s your final group. You may need a pillow as this might last into the night. The group is Rey, HHH, DiBiase, Jericho, Knox, Finlay, Rhodes, Taker, Punk, Kane, R-Truth, RVD, Duggan and Show. That’s 14 people. DO YOU THINK THAT’S ENOUGH? Well since they’re all in here let’s get rid of them. Everyone stops except Duggan who keeps punching someone while everyone else stops to watch which looks really stupid.

He and Taker have their requited showdown and Kane does the required run in to stop it. Show puts out Duggan. Jericho jumps on Show which is amusing now. Truth gets thrown out by Show after a beating. Show throws Punk over three times and then knocks him out with a right hand. Punk’s selling is masterful. You know, the selling he demonstrated when he tapped to Cena in 2 minutes at the Slammies because that made SO much sense right?

Show puts out Knox and Rey as Horny comes in for no apparent reason and then Kane eliminates Finlay. Van Dam nods at a referee which I’d assume means something. Show and Taker go at it of course because that has to happen at least once every six months. Yeah Van Dam goes out soon after so I’m assuming a referee signaled that he was next out or something. I’ve always wondered how they knew when to do that.

Taker puts out Jericho and we’re down to seven. We’ve got Legacy, the big trio and HHH. There goes Kane, shocking no one as he jobs first. Legacy goes after Taker which is surprising. Taker counters with a double clothesline and a chokeslam for Orton. He doesn’t throw him over because he has to win though. Taker and Show have a boxing match or something resembling one. Taker has somehow shrunk from 7’0 to 6’11 to 6’10 to now 6’9 over the years.

Orton tries and RKO but just gets shoved off which never gets old. Taker and Show fight on the apron and Orton puts Show out who then pulls Taker out. Priceless being caught in a double choke by Taker made me imagine them in the locker room and Taker saying boys I’ve got cups older than you so sit down. That leaves us with Legacy and HHH as it’s all about him again.

This is a step down from HHH, Batista, Cena and Kane from last year. You ever notice how HHH is ALWAYS around near the end of these things? He was close in 98, won in 2002, 3rd in 2006, 2nd in 2008 and 2nd in 2009. That’s most interesting isn’t it? He of course throws out Legacy and then Orton dumps him for the completely inevitable win. Massive posing takes us out.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t that good. WAY too many people and WAY too much laying around just drained the life out of it. Van Dam coming in was great but Orton was so clearly the winner here that it sucked the life out of it. That’s something I burned Sly on once as he said that this was one of the best Rumbles ever and then slipped and said that the way you determine a good Rumble is by saying anyone could win.

I asked who else could have won in 09. I’m waiting on a reply to that and it’s been nearly a year boss. Anyway, this wasn’t interesting to me back then or now as it was just about HHH vs. the world and that’s simply not interesting. Of course, they would feud for the majority of the year and kill Raw in the process, but Vince is in love with Orton despite what ratings say so there we go.

Overall Rating: B+. Rumble aside, this is a great show. You have four solid matches with drama and title changes and storyline advancement. What more could you ask for out of this thing? I really liked it and it came out very well. The Rumble itself was pretty bad but then again so was Raw as a whole this year. As for the show, watch it but stop the DVD before the Rumble but after the Rumble package.

So that’s the Royal Rumble up til now. Since this is December 23rd, I have no idea what the 2010 card is going to look like so I have no predictions. Overall, the Rumble is the epitome of hit or miss in the company as some like 92 and 04 are classics and great matches while some like 95 or 99 make you long for a 2000 WCW PPV. It’s been able to make stars like Benoit and Shawn while at the same time some have won it and then done nothing like Duggan, Studd and that Austin guy.

It’s the most unique battle royal in wrestling and it’s the real start to Mania which is what it should be. That first three months or even four months of the year is predicated on this one match and other than one year it’s always been at least a 40 minute match so you’re in for a long one. This is definitely something special, and to think it all started so Vince could screw Crockett. Anyway, tomorrow is the Rumble and I’ll likely be pumped.

Sheamus is currently world champion and I still can’t get over that. Anyway, thanks for reading this and I hope you liked it. That wraps up the big four but I’ll be around with random reviews and some stuff from other companies so keep reading or start if you haven’t read this. Wait what?

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 3, 2011
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Michael Cole

It’s the first show of the year and we have a huge main event in the form of Miz vs. Morrison in a falls count anywhere match for the WWE Title. Apparently that’s going to be opening the show which kind of negates the whole main event thing. Also we’ll get to see the next step in the Punk vs. Cena feud. Let’s get to it.

Theme song opens us up.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. John Morrison

No Lawler due to the beatdown last week by Miz. Morrison takes down Riley to start and we hit the floor very quickly. Morrison fights both guys off and comes off the top of the big W with a huge cross body for two. Back to the ring as that was a very quick segment up there. Missile dropkick gets two for the challenger. The running knee gets two also as Riley interferes. Morrison DESTROYS Riley and we take a break as the paramedics attend to him.

Back with Miz setting up a piece of railing up against the stage. He can’t suplex Morrison through it for awhile but Morrison tries one too many counters and winds up taking a backdrop into it for two. Back towards the ring again with Miz in control. They slug it out in the ring with Morrison taking over again.

Morrison gets Miz down and goes for Starship Pain. Miz rolls out of the way and gets the Reality Check for two. He charges but rams into the post. Starship Pain hits for two and a big kick sends Miz to the floor. Morrison sets up a table and goes for Starship Pain off the top through the table. The champion moves and the table more or less explodes in an awesome looking spot. That somehow only gets two and Miz is ticked off. The Skull Crushing Finale on the floor ends this clean at approximately 22:00.

Rating: B+. This was a good brawl and a solid back and forth match. I’m not sure if I get the point of having Morrison use his title shot on the first show of the year rather than the Rumble but there’s time to see what they’ve got planned I suppose. This had some good spots and there were a few moments of possibility that the title could change hands. Good stuff but it never hit the level they wanted it to I don’t think.

There’s a #1 contenders match later in a cage.

Back with a new backstage interviewer who is with Miz. Miz goes on about how he’s WWE Champion and is still awesome.

We recap the Natalya vs. Melina issues with Cole saying Natalya needs to get over it.

Melina/Maryse/Alicia Fox vs. Natalya/Brie Bella/Eve Torres

Quick break between the intros. Those are some lackluster partners for Natalya. Maryse and Brie brawl to start with Maryse controlling. Brie is sent to the floor and the twins switch under the ring. Off to Natalya and Alicia and Natalya is more concerned with getting at Melina than Alicia. Butterfly suplex puts Alicia down and Natalya goes after Melina. The champion gets clotheslined over the top rope and here’s Melina officially. Natalya drills her with a spinning forearm and brings in Eve. Not much of a showdown there. Eve hits a spinning neckbreaker to end it at approximately 3:00.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what the point was to having Natalya be all about getting to Melina and then having them be in at the same time for maybe 4 seconds. The Twin Magic was incredibly quick and didn’t serve much purpose at all. I’m not sure what the actual point to this was but it didn’t work that well.

Uso Brothers vs. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov

Pretty sure this is non-title but I’m not sure. Vladimir and I believe Jimmy start us off. After some brief Russian dominance we’re off to Santino to a big pop. This is looking like a squash so far. I’m glad they’ve giving Santino some real offense such as the sambo stuff. Back to Kozlov and the crowd dies almost immediately.

The Usos take over with basic jobber offense for a little while. Santino comes back in and cleans a few rooms. He isn’t doing enough to classify it as cleaning house you see. Kozlov comes back in illegally to try and help out his partner by growling at an Uso. Somehow this works but Kozlov winds up getting sent to the floor. Vlad gets stuck on the ropes for a bit so Santino has to finish shoving him over. Santino sets for the Cobra but walks into a Samoan Drop for the surprising pin at 4:02.

Post match Tamina and Santino hit a double Cobra on Jey. You never would know they had just lost the match based on how well they’re taking it.

Rating: D. Pretty ugly match here with the crowd completely dying when Santino wasn’t in there. The Usos aren’t exactly an interesting team but they’re better than nothing I suppose. It gives them actual challengers which they’ve been needing since they won the belts. Weak match though.

Tough Enough is officially coming back. Oh joy.

Punk is on his way to the ring.

Back from a break with the new leader of Nexus. Punk says he loves being in Phoenix and that he’s been bust all day looking for Cena. He couldn’t find him anywhere though and that he, ahem, couldn’t see him. Cena isn’t here this week because of Punk and what happened last week.

Punk talks about being a leader of men and that Nexus saw this and they almost begged him to be their new leader. We see a clip of the Nexus beatdown from last week and Punk’s GTS. Punk talks about hustle, loyalty and respect and how it’s just a catchphrase to Cena but to Punk it’s very real. Cena can’t win this fight and Punk is taking over both Nexus and Monday Night Raw.

Here’s Wade Barrett who isn’t thrilled with this at all. Barrett says that Cena isn’t here because of a beating he gave Cena in a match in Pennsylvania earlier in the week which is true kind of. Barrett also says he’s the leader of Nexus, not Punk. Punk says Nexus needed new management and now has it. Wade says that Punk is a liar, including about being straightedge.

Punk says let’s ask Nexus who the liar is and Barrett agrees, calling down the troops. I like how they come out in the V formation like an army. We get an E-Mail almost immediately and tonight there’s are three participants in a match in the cage for the title shot at the Rumble. It’s Barrett vs. Punk vs. Sheamus vs. Orton. They finally have something that looks like an e-mail on the screen too. Ah apparently only Barrett or Punk can be in the cage.

Barrett says he’ll take the spot as the leader of the Nexus. Punk says take it as he’s a talker not a fighter. If Barrett wins the match then Punk will work for him and Barrett can be the leader. If Barrett loses he’s out of Nexus and Punk is officially the leader.

Del Rio is here? Nice surprise. I love that car he’s in which is a red and white Chevy from the 1967. He says it’s his destiny to be world champion and that he’ll show that tonight. It’s his destiny to win the Rumble and be in the main event at Wrestlemania. R-Truth apparently disagrees. Truth says that Alberto’s destiny is to go back where he came from.

Alberto Del Rio vs. R-Truth

Truth dominates early on with his usual unorthodox offense. A clothesline puts Alberto on the floor almost immediately and a dive over the top puts Del Rio down as we take a break. Back with Truth hammering away on Alberto in the corner. Del Rio gets in a shot to break the momentum and hits a Codebreaker onto the arm.

Off to an armbar as we talk about how Del Rio has taken out various people on the Smackdown roster and wants to take out more. Truth tries to fight back but can’t do his flip out of the corner due to the arm. A modified arm drag gets two and it’s back to the arm. Truth manages to send Alberto to the floor and starts taking over with his one good arm. And never mind as Alberto sends his arm into the post and the Cross Armbreaker (with very little torque on it at all) ends this clean in 10:00.

Rating: C+. Better than I expected here given that R-Truth is a guy I can’t get into at all. Del Rio gets another nice win to further his push even more which is something he needs, especially before his big match with Rey on Friday. Nice little match here with Truth being able to hang in there for awhile but at the end being overwhelmed in the end.

Barrett talks to Nexus and says that he can make each and every one of them champions like he did Slater and Gabriel. Punk comes up and calls out Barrett when Barrett says Punk is using Nexus for his own gain. Punk says they’re all pulling for him. Barrett leaves and Punk shakes all of their hands.

Over to Orton who says last year meant nothing and that the only thing he cared about was Miz cashing in. Orton says he was FAR too nice as he actually held back a bit and didn’t punt Jericho. He says that nice guys finish last and implies that isn’t happening anymore.

Cage match is next.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus

In a cage and the winner gets Miz at the Rumble. We’re going old school here as it’s escape only. Cena might be back next week. BIG pop for Orton. Sheamus and Orton beat down Barrett early on but Sheamus tries to run away, only to be stopped by Orton. Barrett takes over off the distraction and goes for Wasteland which is acknowledged as the move that injured Cena. Orton tries to escape to no avail.

Sheamus tries to escape to complete the set of people trying to get out. Orton almost goes through the door but turns back around to coil up in front of the other two. Cole says Orton couldn’t have made it out, but it was pretty clear he could have. Odd indeed and we take a break.

Back with Orton almost all the way out until Sheamus makes the save. Barrett helps to finally pull him back in and the two evildoers take over again. Orton tries for the elevated DDT on Sheamus but has to stop to keep Barrett from getting out. He tries for a double elevated DDT but Barrett fights out of it. Sheamus blocks as well and sends Orton into the steel.

Orton gets taken down by the two UK dudes but since one is Irish and one is British they start fighting amongst themselves. Barrett goes up but slips, allowing Orton to make another save. Superplex puts Barrett down as are Orton and Sheamus. Sheamus gets up and beats the tar out of Barrett but can’t get through the door thanks to Orton.

Barrett sends Sheamus into the cage multiple times and adds a pump handle slam. Orton is back up though and gets taken down almost immediately by a Boss Man Slam. Barrett tries to escape but Sheamus slows him down. Wade kicks him down but instead of going out he tries a top rope elbow which gets knees. Sheamus doesn’t take the chance to get out either and gets taken down by Orton’s clotheslines.

Powerslams to both guys and the Angle Slam to Sheamus. Elevated DDT to Barrett but Sheamus slows Randy down. They slug it out on the top rope until Barrett kicks said rope to crotch both guys. Both guys are down now after a pair of big boots. Barrett is the only person up so he tries to climb out. Here’s Punk though, climbing into the cage and offering his hand. He’d help a lot better to just open the door for him but whatever.

Barrett takes his hand but Punk goes all Scar to Barrett’s Mufasa and pulls the armband off and shoves Barrett back into the ring. Sheamus puts Orton down and the door is open. And of course there’s the RKO to Sheamus so that Orton can go through the door at 19:40 to get the title shot at the Rumble. Oh joy.

Rating: A-. I liked this better than the opener actually. The escape only worked very well and it does two things as it sets up the PPV and gets Barrett out of Nexus (not mentioned at all post match). This was a more old school style with the false finishes and saves. I like the lack of pinning as it makes it feel more about survival than winning. Very good match to close out Raw.

Overall Rating: B+. Well you certainly can’t complain about a lack of wrestling here with two very good matches that both ran about twenty minutes.  Throw in a ten minute Alberto match and you’re looking at nearly an hour of wrestling on a two hour and ten minute show.  This was fun stuff as we’re in Rumble mode now and things are starting to click.  Good stuff here, although I’m not looking forward to Miz vs. Orton at all.

Results

The Miz b. John Morrison – Skull Crushing Finale

Natalya/Brie Bella/Eve Torres b. Melina/Maryse/Alicia Fox – Spinning neckbreaker to Melina

Uso Brothers b. Vladimir Kozlov/Santino Marella – Samoan Drop to Marella

Alberto Del Rio b. R-Truth – Cross Armbreaker

Randy Orton b. Sheamus and Wade Barrett – Orton escaped the cage