Smackdown – April 17, 2020: That’s The Best Part?

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 17, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s time to move forwards towards Money in the Bank and this time around we are finding out who else is going to be involved in the women’s match, plus the first man involved. I’m not sure how much steam these empty arena shows have left but they’re all we’re getting at the moment. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Cole runs down the card.

It’s time for A Moment Of Bliss to start things off. After bragging about being two time Women’s Tag Team Champions (I completely forgot their first reign, which isn’t a good sign for titles that are fourteen months old), Nikki Cross brings out Braun Strowman. They congratulate Braun on being the new Universal Champion but bring up the fact that he is officially defending against Bray Wyatt (not the Fiend) at Money in the Bank.

Strowman knows Bray and the games he plays so Bray is going to get these hands. There’s a present on the mat though and it seems to be for Braun. Inside is….the old mask he wore as part of the Wyatt Family. Braun looks upset and we hear Bray’s laughter as a picture of Braun in the mask comes on the screen.

Post break, Cole and Graves explain what we just saw.

Sasha Banks vs. Tamina

If Tamina wins, she gets a Women’s Title match at Money in the Bank and Bayley is on commentary. Sasha throws her a shirt to start but Tamina says it’s not the right size. The shirt is thrown at Bayley and Banks’ rollup completely fails. A headbutt sends Banks to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Sasha hammering away and bending the back of Tamina’s neck around the rope. The chinlock goes on but Tamina fights up with something like a Rock Bottom to send Sasha outside. Bayley offers a distraction so Sasha can get in a posting, a 619 on the apron and a ram into the steps. Bayley loads up a cheap shot but here’s Lacey Evans to cut her off. Tamina hits a superkick and hits a second inside for the pin and the title shot at 8:34.

Rating: D+. So yeah we have the next Jinder Mahal here, as Tamina has never done anything of note (until she won a triple threat match a few weeks ago, she hadn’t won a match in over a year) but now she wins a match or two and we’re supposed to forget about how unimportant and nothing she has been for years. It’s bad storytelling, it’s illogical, it’s annoying to the fans who watch every week and WWE is going to keep doing it over and over because they don’t know how long term storytelling and character building works anymore.

Jey Usos is ready for the triple threat and shouts a lot.

Post break Lacey says wherever Sasha goes, she goes. She’s a Marine, and isn’t stopping until the mission is accomplished. That would be no more Sasha, which is written on the back of her hand.

Sheamus vs. Denzel DeJournette

Sheamus shrugs off a takedown attempt and elbows/knees away at the head. The Brogue kick finishes at 1:03.

Post match Cole starts introducing a video on Jeff Hardy but Sheamus interrupts and asks what is Cole’s malfunction. That’s too much disrespect to Sheamus, fella.

We get the second part of the Jeff Hardy video, which features a bunch of dives that banged Hardy up. It resulted in his addiction issues and caused his career to start spiraling down. Then he left in 2009 (the World Title reigns aren’t mentioned) and we see some videos of him high and drunk, which are still hard to watch. This led to a lot of his legal problems and Jeff knows that he has a lot to make up for. Part three next week.

Carmella comes up to Dana Brooke and isn’t happy that Dana isn’t focused on their Tag Team Title match next week. Dana explains the Money in the Bank idea and says she can do both. Carmella isn’t convinced, just like I’m not convinced that any WWE writer has ever had a conversation with a human if this is supposed to sound authentic.

Commentary talks about the Money in the Bank ladder matches….which will take place at WWE Corporate headquarters with the briefcases ON THE ROOF OF TITAN TOWERS! Well that’s a new one!

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Naomi vs. Dana Brooke

Naomi’s helmet is back and at least it covers up that ridiculous looking hair. Naomi kicks her down for two to start but gets thrown outside. Back in and Dana grabs a bodyscissors, allowing her to talk a lot of extra audible trash. That’s broken up so Naomi kicks her in the head a few times, followed by a springboard kick to the face for two. A powerbomb gives Dana the same but the Rear View connects for two more. Naomi is SHOCKED that it didn’t work, making me roll my eyes a good bit. The split legged moonsault misses though and Brooke gets a rollup pin at 4:10.

Rating: D+. I still like Brooke more than most but it’s in the same vein as Tamina: she has barely won anything and yet we’re supposed to take her as a threat. Even if there’s a huge upset and she wins the ladder match and title, it’s still way too much to buy her as a top star. Wins and losses matter if you watch regularly and while this isn’t as bad as Tamina getting a title shot, I’m still not buying it.

During the post match replays, Corey says Dana is the first person to kick out of the Rear View. Normally I’d have to look it up but I’m just refusing to believe that’s true.

Long recap of Otis/Mandy Rose and the Sonya Deville/Dolph Ziggler plan to stop them.

Here’s a very upset Sonya Deville to beg Mandy’s forgiveness. They’ve been friends forever and for the first time in forever, Mandy isn’t here. Sonya has wanted to tell her something but here’s Mandy in person to cut her off. Fighting back tears, Sonya says….that Mandy is the most selfish human being she has ever met. As soon as Mandy became interested in Otis, she was ready to kick Sonya to the curb.

Now all Sonya wants to do is see Mandy hurt. Mandy might be pretty but she’s a dime a dozen blonde who was built in a lab. Sonya worked forever to be second to a talentless piece of eye candy. Now Sonya is going to ruin her life because she isn’t going to deal with some centerfold Barbie b****. Cue Ziggler to say he’s made a mistake but they had a great Valentines Day. Mandy slaps his hand away and Sonya jumps her, freaking Dolph out. Otis runs in for the save and house is cleaned, likely setting up a mixed tag. Well done on throwing in a bit of a surprise instead of Sonya declaring her love for Mandy.

We get the tribute video to Howard Finkel. That voice is never going to be topped and it’s very rare to see someone who clearly loved wrestling like he did. We get a lot NEEEEWWWW’s and a look at his comedy stuff, which really did work for him.

Miz thinks it is an injustice that he has to defend the Tag Team Titles in another three person triple threat match after John Morrison already did it at Wrestlemania. I’d call it more of a bad idea than an injustice.

Video on the Forgotten Sons.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. Daniel Bryan

Shinsuke Nakamura and Drew Gulak are the seconds. Cesaro shows off a bit by jumping up to touch the briefcase above the ring. Bryan wastes no time in knocking Cesaro to the floor for a suicide dive….and here’s the masked guy on the screen to show us more hidden video. He says some keep their friends close and others keep their enemies closer. There is no video shown though and we take a break.

Back with Bryan working on an armbar and then grabbing a cross armbreaker. Cesaro muscles him up with a powerbomb to escape and a slam gets two on Bryan. He heads to the apron but manages to snap Cesaro’s arm across the top rope. A dive off the top is countered into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker though and Cesaro grabs the Sharpshooter. Bryan gets to the rope and goes outside, setting up the running uppercut against the barricade.

Back from another break with Bryan hitting the YES Kicks for two but Cesaro hits a gorilla press knee to the face. The Crossface goes on, only to be reversed into most of the YES Lock. Cesaro clotheslines the heck out of him and unloads with uppercuts in the corner. Bryan’s moonsault out of the corner is caught but Bryan pulls him down into the YES Lock. Nakamura’s interference is cut off by Gulak and Cesaro taps at 14:24.

Rating: B. This is a lot closer to the match that you would have wanted to see from these two as they were given time and allowed to work to their strengths. It helps when you spend a good chunk of your careers wrestling in front of very few people. They know how to do something else and that makes for a better performance like this. Well that and the two of them being Cesaro and Bryan.

Big E. is ready to win the Tag Team Titles on his own. This morning, he slid out of the triple bunk bed and told Kofi and Woods to eat popcorn in the La-Z-Boys because it’s time to become eight time champions.

King Corbin jumps Elias in the back and crushes his hand between two anvil cases. Corbin drags him away. Post break, Corbin steps on Elias’ hand and tells him to sing before hitting him in the throat with a baton. That looks to be it but Corbin breaks the guitar over his back for a bonus. Now this is more like it for Corbin, FAR away from the main event scene and beating up midcarders. I can go for this far more.

Tag Team Titles: Big E. vs. Jey Uso vs. The Miz

Miz is defending the titles on his own. The challengers waste no time in sending Miz outside before Big E. runs Jey over. Big E. talks about having a plan but the other two are back up to suplex him through the announcers’ table. We take a break and come back with Jey hitting back to back suicide dives.

The running Umaga Attacks in the corner make it worse but Big E. catches Jey with the Rock Bottom out of the corner. Miz even goes aerial with a springboard ax handle, allowing him to start the HEY HEY HO HO. Miz can’t Figure Four Jey, who kicks him into Big E. for two instead. The Skull Crushing Final gets two on Jey and now the Figure Four goes on. Big E. breaks that up with the Big Ending to Miz for the pin and the titles at 9:45.

Rating: C-. Kind of a surprising ending as we continue to have New Day as placeholder champions, though they’ve been placeholder champions for what feels like years now. Normally I would say that I hope this doesn’t lead to the Forgotten Sons winning the titles because that would almost guarantee that it does, so yeah I’ve just screwed it up all over again.

We cut to Kofi at his house for an AND NEEEEEEWWWWW for a nice smile inducing moments.

Xavier Woods throws in a bunch of plugs.

Big E. rolls around on the floor shouting EIGHT TIMES to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was ok enough as they’ve managed to make these shows feel like any regular Smackdown. That sounds good in theory, but then you remember that a regular Smackdown isn’t much of a show, much like this one wasn’t. It was a decent enough watch with angle advancement and some good wrestling, but it’s nothing overly memorable. I actually liked that mixed tag angle in the middle as much as anything else, as it was well delivered and the motivations make sense. The match will probably be junk, but points for the setup. Not a great show by any means, but watchable enough for Smackdown.

Results

Tamina b. Sasha Banks – Superkick

Sheamus b. Denzel DeJournette – Brogue Kick

Dana Brooke b. Naomi – Sunset flip

Daniel Bryan b. Cesaro – YES Lock

Big E. b. Jey Uso and Miz – Big Ending to Miz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two: The WWE Psyche

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two
Date: April 5, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re back for more of the same and that might not be the worst thing in the world. Last night’s part one wasn’t half bad but they are going to have a hard time surpassing that main event. There are eight more matches, plus the required Kickoff Show match, tonight so hopefully they can have another good one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

Kickoff Show: Liv Morgan vs. Natalya

Morgan rolls her up for two to start so Natalya does the same for a standoff. Some more rollups get some more near falls until Morgan sends her into the corner. A running hip attack hits Natalya but she’s right back with her basement dropkick for two more. Natalya clotheslines her to the floor, followed by the surfboard back inside. Natalya: “ASK HER!!!!” That’s broken up and Liv’s Codebreaker gets two. The sitout wheelbarrow faceplant gives Natalya the same and they pinfall reversal sequence with Liv getting the pin at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Imagine that: a Natalya match being technically fine but completely emotionless. That’s been the definition of her career for years now and I don’t see it changing anytime soon. Liv getting a win is fine but there is no way that she is getting anywhere near the top of the division, leaving this as little more than a way to fill time.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show in a new message.

Same opening video as last night.

Rob Gronkowski welcomes us to the show and throws us to the first match.

NXT Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending. The feel each other out to start with Charlotte going straight to the leg. That doesn’t work so Rhea gets in her face, earning some chops into the corner. Ripley is right back with Riptide for two and it’s time for a quick breather. They fight to the floor with Charlotte hitting a double chop but Rhea sends her into the steps. Back in and Rhea hits a dropkick before kicking away at the ribs.

A bodyscissors keeps Charlotte down but Rhea misses a running big boot and hurts her leg on the rope. Charlotte works on the leg, shrugs off a shot to the head, and bends the leg around on the mat. Rhea won’t quit so Charlotte works on the leg again. Back up and Rhea nails a basement dropkick, followed by some shouting at her own knee. The leg is fine enough for an electric chair faceplant for two, followed by a missile dropkick for the same, albeit after a delay because of the knee.

Charlotte chop blocks the knee though and Rhea is down again. The Figure Four doesn’t work again and Rhea reverses into the standing Cloverleaf. That’s broken up as well and Charlott knocks her down with another hard shot. The Figure Four is broken up again so Charlotte goes with a Boston crab instead.

Ripley gets out again and hits a quick big boot (thanks to some editing) for the double knockdown. Rhea takes her up top but gets slammed back down, though she’s able to raise her boots to block the moonsault. A horrible looking spear gives Charlotte two but the Figure Four finally goes on. The Figure Eight makes Ripley tap at 20:26.

Rating: C+. CHARLOTTE! WINS!! AGAIN!!! I have no idea why they needed to have her beat Rhea clean in their first match but I’m sure it has something to do with some kind of tribute to Ric Flair, who hasn’t had one in a while. I’m sick of seeing Charlotte with a title and it almost scares me to imagine how many titles she’s going to wind up with in the end.

We recap last night.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Lana is here with Lashley. Black gets tossed around to start and Lashley hammers away, only to get low bridged to the floor. A running big boot puts Lashley on the floor but Black misses the moonsault. Lashley snaps off the overhead belly to belly but can’t get a suplex back inside. Instead Black kicks him in the chest, only to walk into a snap powerslam for two. Another suplex gets another two and Lashley loads up the Dominator, but Lana tells him to do the spear. That earns him Black Mass for the sudden pin at 7:14.

Rating: D+. This was a way to get Black on the show, and by that I mean a way for him to get beaten up until Lana and Lana alone cost Lashley the match. I’m glad Black won but if you want him to look good, just have him kick Lashley’s head off and win. It’s not like Lashley has anything going on at the moment, but now I’m sure we can get the big fallout with Lana now, because we need another part to that story.

Bayley complains about the elimination match and knows Sasha Banks won’t turn on her. With Bayley gone, Sasha is asked how much she wants to win the title. You’ll have to watch and see.

Money in the Bank ad.

Gronk would like to win the 24/7 Title.

We recap Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. Otis was going to go on a Valentine’s Day date with Mandy Rose but Ziggler crashed it when Otis was late. Mandy wanted nothing else to do with Otis after that but it turns out that Sonya Deville stole Mandy’s phone and told Otis she would be late (and deleted the texts) so it would fall apart.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Otis

Sonya Deville is here with Ziggler. Otis misses a charge to start and gets superkicked outside in a hurry. That gets one back inside so Ziggler grabs a neckbreaker into the jumping elbow for two. The chinlock goes on but Otis is back up with a catapult. A hard whip sends Ziggler into the corner and a pop up World’s Strongest Slam plants him again. Sonya gets on the apron for a distraction though and Ziggler gets in a low blow. Cue Mandy to take out Sonya and hit Ziggler low, setting up the Caterpillar for the pin at 8:23.

Rating: D+. I was wrong on this one as I didn’t think they would let Otis pin Dolph. I’m rather please by the result and even though it wasn’t much of a match, at least they pulled the trigger on something. You can pencil in the mixed tag coming up and that’s all well and good, though I’m not sure where they can go after that.

Post match Otis picks Mandy up and they get the first kiss.

We recap Edge vs. Randy Orton. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble but Orton attacked him the next night and put him back on the shelf. Orton said Edge was an adrenaline junkie and he attacked him so Edge wouldn’t ruin his life like Orton did. To make it worse, Orton RKOed Edge’s wife (who is a Hall of Famer who wrestled earlier this year so we needed to act like he shot her). Now it’s a Last Man Standing match as this is very personal.

Edge vs. Randy Orton

Last Man Standing. Edge comes out first and glares at the stage for Orton….who is disguised as a cameraman and runs in for an RKO before the bell. The bell rings and it’s another RKO but Edge falls to the floor at nine. They fight back backstage with Orton knocking Edge through some doors. It goes onto the gym with Orton knocking him down again, setting up some choking with a rope on a machine.

Edge gets out and hits a dropkick through some machines before choking away at Orton. Some forearms put Orton in a chair and Edge pulls himself up on a bar for a seated senton of all things. Back up and they slug it out into another room with a red light. Both guys are sent face first into a garage door and it’s back into the arena. Orton shoves him off a platform and into the barricade before they stumble backstage again.

Edge’s head gets bounced off of another wall for a six count and it’s time to go into the office area. This time it’s Orton being sent into a wall but Edge kicks him in the ribs at nine. Orton gets thrown onto the big table so Edge pulls himself up onto part of the ceiling to drop an elbow. The cameraman gets knocked down but another one catches them up in the big storage facility in the back.

Both of them bounce off of various things until Orton knocks him onto a storage crate. Edge gets sent into some steps and Orton starts looking around. That’s good for another nine so they wind up in what looks like the promo area. Edge throws something at Orton’s leg to take him down and some more shots to the face do it again. Orton is placed on a table and drops a huge elbow.

They go to a truck with a cover on the bed and Orton hits the hanging DDT for nine. Edge climbs onto some crates and then on top of an NXT semi truck. Orton and the referee follow them up and it’s a spear to drop Orton. That’s good for nine but another spear is countered into an RKO.

Edge is up at nine as well but Orton has dropped down to the floor next to the biggest ladder I’ve ever seen in WWE (it’s on the floor and is WAY higher than the top of the semi truck). Instead Orton takes some chairs up to the top of the truck to load up the Conchairto. Edge grabs a head and arm choke though and Orton is out. Hold on though as Edge waves off the count so he can hit the Conchairto. Orton is finally done at 36:39.

Rating: B. This one is going to be divisive and I can understand that. If my math is right, this was the longest non-Iron Man match in Wrestlemania history, though it didn’t feel that long. It felt like two guys who wanted to hurt each other and were doing whatever they could to accomplish that. I liked the unique atmosphere and some of the spot, with the Conchairto making for a good finish.

After a quick breather, here’s Mojo Rawley with the Mob chasing him. Gronk shows up and dives off a platform to take out the pile, allowing him to pin Rawley for the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. Austin Theory/Angel Garza

The Profits are defending. Dawkins shoulders Theory down to start and the champs start working on the arm. That’s fine with Theory, who sends Dawkins to the floor, allowing Theory to mock the dancing. Garza gets in a superkick on the floor, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and misses a clothesline so Dawkins can tag Ford in.

A DDT gets two on Ford and Garza hits the moonsault onto both champs on the floor. The Lionsault gets two more on Ford back inside but Ford pops up with an enziguri. Dawkins comes in and runs Garza over, only to get caught in Theory’s TKO. Ford frog splashes his way in for the save though and Dawkins gets the cover to retain at 6:23.

Rating: D+. If ever there was a match to cut for the sake of time. This was a weird one as there was no reason to believe the title change was taking place and then the finish felt like something the heels would do to win. There are no teams to challenge the Profits at the moment and I don’t see Theory and Garza changing that anytime soon.

Post match Garza and Theory stay on Ford but Bianca Belair runs in for the save. That means a KOD on Zelina.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending and this is under elimination rules. Tamina shrugs off the gang attack to start so Lacey chop blocks her down. The other four slug it out with Bayley and Sasha double teaming Lacey. Naomi makes a quick save as a mini tag match breaks out. Tamina comes back in to run everyone over and we actually get a Team Bad reunion. That lasts for all of three seconds as everyone goes after Tamina, including something off the top each. A dog pile pin gets rid of Tamina at 6:23.

Naomi dives onto Sasha but Lacey misses a dive onto Bayley, earning a ram into the steps. A sunset flip gives Naomi two on Bayley and Sasha at the same time, followed by a sliding slip to both. The Rear View hits Sasha and a Bubba Bomb into the reverse Rings of Saturn….is broken up by Bayley. The Bank Statement gets rid of Naomi (Bayley: “DANCE TO THE BACK!”) at 10:36 and we’re down to three.

Bayley shouts about Lacey’s daughter though, allowing Lacey to avoid the running knee. Sasha is knocked silly instead so Lacey small packages Bayley for two. Back in and Sasha yells at Bayley, who shoves Sasha out of the way of the Woman’s Right. Lacey hits the second attempt though and Banks is done at 13:23.

After a replay where you can hear Cole shouting commentary, Bayley mocks Lacey with a salute and shoves her face against the rope. Lacey gets posted for two so Bayley ties her arm to the corner with the tag rope. Since that’s kind of a stupid plan, Lacey kicks her way out and hits the slingshot Bronco Busters in the corner. After a slow motion salute, Lacey’s double jump moonsault gets two. Cue Sasha with a Backstabber to Lacey though and Bayley’s weird bulldog driver retains at 19:15.

Rating: D. Well that was long and served little purpose. Bayley has held the title since last May (save for a four day Charlotte reign) and I’m not sure what else there is for her to do. Unless they do Bayley vs. Becky (unlikely), what is the point in keeping it on her much longer? I’m sure we’ll get to Bayley vs. Banks again eventually, but dang that sounds as appealing as watching this match all over again.

Titus O’Neil takes Gronk’s place as host.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angeles.

We recap The Fiend vs. John Cena in the Firefly Fun House. After Cena said that he didn’t want to wrestle at this year’s show, Fiend popped up to challenge him. Cena accepted, and then Bray Wyatt went on to say that he blamed Cena for the rise of the Fiend. See, Cena beat him at Wrestlemania XXX and messed with Bray’s mind, leading to the creation of the Fiend. Therefore, tonight Cena goes to the Fun House.

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Cena makes his entrance but the Firefly Fun House pops up, with Bray saying that Cena is about to face himself. Then Cena is teleported to the Fun House (apparently the same way Seth Rollins got there back in October), where Ramblin Rabbit sends him through a door after the Fiend. Cena follows and finds the Vince puppet, asking if Cena has the ruthless aggression to make it in this company.

We see Wyatt copying the Kurt Angle promo to challenge Cena from 2002 and here’s 2020 Cena in 2002 Cena attire. Cena keeps saying RUTHLESS AGGRESSION but misses a bunch of shots. Bray: “You can look but you can’t touch!” And now it’s the Saturday Night’s Main Event opening, with Bray standing behind a cage and imitating Hulk Hogan. Cena (Johnny Largemeat) comes up and starts rapidly lifting weights, apparently destroying his arms in the process.

Vince and the Mercy the Buzzard are on commentary as Bray asks what happens when Cena realizes that Ego Mania has been running wild on him. Bray sends him off camera to the Smackdown Fist where Cena is the Dr. of Thugnomics, with Bray dancing to Basic Thuganomics. They’re back in the ring and Cena finds out that he can only speak in rhymes, including a Husky Harris reference.

Bray calls Cena a bully and a horrible person who takes the weaknesses of others and turns them into jokes. With that, Bray gives him the floor so Cena throws him Deez Nuts. Cena, in the Babe Ruth jersey from last year, misses a charge and gets knocked out by a chain. Now it’s Bray back in the Wyatt Family gear and sitting in the rocking chair as we see clips of Wrestlemania XXX.

The fans wanted and needed him that night and now it’s time to rewrite his own story. They’re back in the ring now with Bray dancing with the unconscious Cena and loading up Sister Abigail. He lets Cena go though and drops down, handing Cena a chair in a recreation of Wrestlemania XXX. Bray tells Cena to fix his mistake from last year but Bray disappears away from Cena’s swing.

And now it’s…..NWO MONDAY NITRO??? Bray is Eric Bischoff (with the jacket and a Wolfpac shirt) and introduces Cena as Hollywood Hogan. Cena takes Bray down and unloads as we see clips of Cena’s past. He wakes up as himself and sees that he’s beating up Huskus the Pig. The Fiend appears behind him and gives him the Mandible Claw to knock Cena out. We hear Cena’s promo about ending the most overrated overhyped superstar ever and the Claw goes back on with Bray counting the pin. Cena teleports away and the Fiend stands alone.

No rating as this wasn’t a match but I got into this. It’s a rather interesting character study of Cena and you can get what they’re going with in Fiend making him face his fears. Back in the day, CM Punk said that Cena had become the New York Yankees: the big bad who held people down and used money to get what he wants (or going from the Real American Hogan to Hollywood Hogan as they used here).

That’s what Fiend is showing Cena here and it scared Cena that he had changed so much and become what he fought against for so many years. Now granted, if you haven’t been glued to WWE for the last….oh eight years or so, this made no sense, but the effort and thought was ALL there and I got most of what they were going for, plus some of the complete insanity that went along with it. Not a match, but kind of a fascinating weird look into the WWE psyche.

We cut to Titus O’Neil. Titus: “I don’t know what I just saw.”

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre. Lesnar is World Champion but Drew eliminated him from the Royal Rumble and then won the whole thing, earning him this spot. Drew has kicked his head off a few times since then to show he can hang with Brock.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and gets Claymored for two after about ten seconds. Another Claymore misses and it’s time to go to Suplex City. The F5 gets one and Brock isn’t happy. Another F5 gets two and there’s the third for another two. Another F5 is countered and McIntyre hits two more Claymores. A fourth gives Drew the pin and the title at 4:28.

Rating: D. I’m happy that McIntyre won but GOOD GRIEF STOP DOING THAT SAME MATCH OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER! It’s a cool idea one time and then don’t do it again for years. This is all Lesnar does anymore and now it’s creeping over into other main events too. It loses its impact when they keep doing it again and again and now you’ve grown to expect it every time. Anyway, great moment to end the show and McIntyre as champion is awesome, assuming they don’t have Lesnar win it back in two months again.

Overall Rating: C-. I didn’t like this one as much as last night’s but it still wasn’t terrible. This one definitely felt like the bigger show and had the more intriguing matches (for the most part). I’m not wild on some of the booking decisions but it felt more like a Wrestlemania and that’s what matters. The crowd being gone didn’t bother me as much either, but the wrestling itself just wasn’t as good. Overall, not bad but last night’s felt tighter and more enjoyable.

Overall Overall Rating: C. With something like this, it’s almost impossible to give the thing a fair rating. When you factor in the day in between and the weird atmosphere, the show was pretty much just ok. There were some very good matches but some that made me wonder why I was wasting my time. Overall it’s an enjoyable one off, but I’m still not behind the idea of a two night Wrestlemania going forward. Until WWE can cut these things WAY down and trim off so much of the unnecessary stuff, it needs to be one night and one night only, just for the sake of sanity if nothing else.

Results

Charlotte b. Rhea Ripley – Figure Eight

Aleister Black b. Bobby Lashley – Black Mass

Otis b. Dolph Ziggler – Caterpillar

Edge b. Randy Orton when Orton couldn’t answer the ten count

Street Profits b. Angel Garza/Austin Theory – Frog splash to Theory

Bayley b. Sasha Banks, Naomi, Tamina and Lacey Evans – Bulldog driver to Evans

Drew McIntyre b. Brock Lesnar – Claymore

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania XXXVI Preview: Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler

IMG Credit: WWE

This one changed a bit.

This is a match I didn’t think I would actually see but it is the kind of thing that has been built up well. Otis has gone from what should be a goofy character to a goofy character with a purpose. The fans are into him and while I don’t think he’s going to be able to last long term at the top of the card, but you would think this is where Mandy Rose sides with Otis and dumps Ziggler. If nothing else there were certainly hints at Ziggler having some kind of a plan with Sonya Deville last week.

In the other prediction I’m sure I’ll get wrong, I’ll take Otis here, though for the life of me I can’t picture Ziggler losing to him. It seems like a situation where no matter how much sense something makes, Vince McMahon would wind up saying that no one would believe Otis wins the match and Rose chooses him. I hope I’m wrong because it would be so annoying, but it isn’t out of the question. Otis wins and mixed tag rematches abound, but I wouldn’t bet on it.




Smackdown – April 3, 2020: GTV Was Good

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: April 3, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Michael Cole

While it might not feel like it, this is the go home show for Wrestlemania. The show is again taped, and maybe now that we are only twenty two hours away from the start of the show, we can get some kind of information about the changed World Title match. I mean it’s not like it’s that important or anything. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

There are ladders around the arena and it’s time for MizTV, but here are the Usos instead. They aren’t waiting to be invited out here because it’s time for them to win the Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania. Cue the New Day to say not so fast because it’s time for them to enter the annals (Big E: “Hehe annals.”) of history by winning the titles again. The fight is about to start but here are Miz and Morrison to interrupt.

Miz talks about how New Day and the Usos will destroy each other, allowing he and Morrison to retain. They climb the ladders and say BE JEALOUS but New Day and the Usos run up the ramp so the brawl can be on in a hurry. The ladders are knocked over and, just as Miz said, New Day and the Usos beat each other up, allowing the champs to pose.

Naomi vs. Lacey Evans vs. Tamina

Sasha Banks and Bayley are on commentary. Tamina cleans house to start and we take a very early break. Back with Tamina getting one on Naomi but Lacey comes back in to take over. The slingshot Bronco Buster connects as Sasha and Bayley no sell questions about turning on each other at Wrestlemania. Sasha gets up and sends Lacey into the steps, leaving Naomi to sunset flip Tamina for two. A Samoan drop gives Tamina two so Bayley offers a quick distraction, allowing Tamina to superkick Naomi for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: D+. This was your “hey Tamina really could win” match, followed by everyone collectively laughing. She’s in the match to get it up to a higher number, though I’m still not entirely sure why she’s on the roster. Nothing to see here of course, but at least they got the Tamina stuff out of their system tonight.

Post match Bayley tries to make amends with Tamina and gets superkicked. Sasha tries the same and gets Samoan dropped.

Tucker is warming up when the circle of lights pops up. This time the words “THE TRUTH WILL BE TOLD” flashes up on screen.

From Wrestlemania XXIV:

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Flair has the blue robe one more time and while I’m still a fan of the black and white one, I can’t help but smile at seeing the classic look again. Shawn shoulders him down to start and it’s clear that they’re going to have all the time they want here. They trade some hammerlocks with Shawn getting the better of it on the mat. That’s broken up as well and we get the first WOO.

The chops in the corner let Flair yell about Old Yeller but Shawn slaps him in the face and asks if that’s all he has. An exchange of chops in the corner goes to Flair (as it should) but Shawn elbows him in the jaw and goes up. This time Flair slams him off the top and goes up…..for a crossbody into a near fall! You would think that would get more of a reaction but he has to fail at an early Figure Four attempt.

Shawn kicks him to the floor and tries an Asai moonsault, which only hits the announcers’ table, with his ribs landing on the edge which doesn’t break (I’ve seen that many times and it draws a very real cringe). That’s only good for a nine count and Shawn can barely move because of the ribs. A belly to back suplex gives Flair two and he manages a delayed vertical for the same. Note: Charles Robinson (Little Naitch) is referee here and for some reason he’s in a Smackdown shirt. Yeah he’s a Smackdown referee, but you can’t just throw him in a Raw shirt for the occasion?

Flair’s neckbreaker gets two more but Shawn sends him outside. That means a moonsault to the floor which takes Flair out and bangs up the ribs even more. They chop it out back inside and it’s Shawn’s forearm into the nipup as the pace picks up a bit. A slam drops Flair and Shawn’s top rope elbow connects, meaning it’s time to Tune of the Band. Shawn can’t bring himself to do it though and Flair grabs the legs and slaps on the Figure Four in the middle of the ring.

The hold is turned over and they load up the bridge into the backslide….but Flair just can’t do it anymore so they go into a rollup instead. It’s time for the chop block and NOW the Figure Four is on for real. Shawn crawls to the rope so Flair stomps away some more until the referee drags him away. That’s enough of a delay for Shawn to hit Sweet Chin Music for a very close two and the fans go nuts on the kickout.

Shawn loads it up again but stops to tell Flair to get up. That means a low blow (again, you knew he was getting that in somehow) for two more and the fans really bought the near fall. To mix things up a bit, Shawn sweeps the legs and tries a reverse Figure Four (thank goodness it wasn’t a Sharpshooter) to send Flair bailing to the ropes this time.

A rollup with tights gets two and they chop it out from their knees. The chops bring them to their feet and Shawn hits another superkick to put Flair down. There’s no cover though as Shawn goes into the corner and Flair slowly gets up. Shawn says the now legendary I’m Sorry, I Love You and superkicks Flair one more time, this time for the pin at 20:34.

Rating: B+. I don’t remember truly liking this one before and that’s because there are different ways to look at it. It’s hard not to look at a match like this through the emotional lens but if you take that away (which you kind of have to given that Flair wound up wrestling again), it’s actually a heck of a match with all of the old Flair tropes thrown in. Those worked for so long because it’s a great formula that can work against anyone. When you add in Shawn’s second to none abilities, there was no way this wouldn’t be outstanding.

The problem though is that Flair just can’t do a lot of this stuff anymore. He’s trying as hard as he can and what he could still do was good, but seeing him not be able to bridge up anymore was rather sad because it’s something he’s done for so many years before. I don’t remember liking this match that much but it really is a strong one, even ignoring all the other things added to it.

Post match Shawn leaves the ring and a crying Flair gets to his feet for one of the best standing ovations you’ll ever see. This is more than deserved and while he should have retired a long time ago (you could argue all the way back in the 90s), he was far from embarrassing himself and someone as influential, successful and downright talented as he was should absolutely get this kind of a sendoff. And for those who are wondering why, this was originally going to close the show but Flair refused and insisted it go in the middle.

We look back at Elias being attacked last week.

Goldberg is now defending against Braun Strowman. No reason is given and the match is just changed.

Otis tells Tucker to leave him a little piece of Dolph Ziggler. Tucker says he ran into Mandy Rose earlier and she asked about him. Otis gets a text and is rather happy before running off.

Tucker vs. Dolph Ziggler

No Otis this time. Tucker runs him over to start and the fight is on in a hurry, including some kicks to Ziggler’s ribs. A quick shot puts Tucker down for the jumping elbow but he’s right back up with a big boot. Ziggler’s DDT out of the corner puts them both down and we take a break. Back with Tucker slugging away and knocking Ziggler outside. That means a ram into the barricade and a side slam gets two back inside. They head outside again and this time it’s a Zig Zag onto the steps for the DQ at 9:17.

Rating: D+. This is the latest part of your soap opera story around here and that’s not the best thing in the world. Otis vs. Ziggler could be entertaining but at the same time, it’s not the kind of match that I need to see at WrestleMania. Ziggler probably could have won here and then taken Tucker out but it could have been a lot worse.

Post match Ziggler loads up the steps but Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville appear to break it up with Otis making the real save. The Truth Will Be Heard appears again and this time we go to a control room. Someone whose face we can’t see says he told us the truth will be heard. He plays a video from Valentine’s Day showing Mandy talking to Sonya.

After Mandy leaves to do something, Sonya picks up Mandy’s phone and sends Otis a text, saying she’ll be late. We see Otis saying that sounds great and Sonya deletes both messages. Sonya then talks to Ziggler, saying both of them will get what they want. Back in the arena, Mandy walks away from Sonya. Otis chases Dolph out as well. Eh GTV could be fun back in the day so this should work.

Post break, Mandy won’t talk to Sonya.

Daniel Bryan vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Cesaro and Drew Gulak are at ringside while Sami Zayn is on commentary. They fight over arm control to start until Bryan dropkicks him to the floor the running baseball slide sets up Bryan’s running knee from the apron and Nakamura is down. Back in and Bryan hits a running dropkick in the corner, only to get knocked off the middle rope. Nakamura’s middle rope knee to the chest gets two and the sliding German suplex in the corner takes us to a break.

Back with Bryan still in trouble as Nakamura kicks away at the chest. Bryan kicks away and goes for the arm, followed by even more kicks to stagger Nakamura again. The YES Lock is countered and Nakamura pulls him into a blocked cross armbreaker. That’s reverses into another armbreaker from Bryan (Sami: “HOW DID HE DO THAT???”) which is switched into the LeBell Lock. Cesaro runs in for the DQ at 11:39.

Rating: C+. This was the first match all night that felt like something worth watching. Bryan and Nakamura are a great pairing and can have a solid match against each other, which is what we got here. They had some time and while Bryan getting the tap out would have been a bit better, this was the best match of the night by a mile.

Video on the Fiend vs. John Cena.

Here’s Cena for the big closing segment. Cena thanks the fans for getting us here and now we are less than one day until Wrestlemania. The thing is, no one knows what is going to happen, including Bray Wyatt himself. See, no one, including Bray, will tell him what a Firefly Fun House match is. Fear can lead to panic and panic can lead to collapse. The Fiend feeds on fear and panic and here we are. Cena will not be afraid and the poor man’s Mr. Rogers isn’t scaring him.

Goldberg has shown how to beat the Fiend and now the Fiend has made this happen. Cena promises a beating but here are the Firefly Fun House characters, saying that after Fiend is done with Cena, he’ll play with them forever. They say forever over and over again until Ramblin Rabbit says he’s here. The lights go out and the Fiend appears in the crow’s nest. Bray himself pops up behind Cena to say let him in. The lights go out again and Cena is alone to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t add much to Wrestlemania but then again it’s not like this is the kind of show that really needs to. Not this year at least, as nothing else makes sense this time around. The announcement of Strowman replacing Reigns was laughably bad as there was no build or explanation, but other than that we had some perfectly fine building for the matches. I don’t really want to see anything more than I did coming in though and the wrestling was mostly weak, but it could have been a lot worse.

Results

Tamina b. Lacey Evans and Naomi – Superkick to Naomi

Tucker b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Ziggler slammed Tucker into the steps

Daniel Bryan b. Shinsuke Nakamura via DQ when Cesaro interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – February 14, 2020: A Crush On Valentine’s Day

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: February 14, 2020
Location: Rogers Arena, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re almost to Super ShowDown and things are starting to take shape. That will be the case again this week as we get to build towards Goldberg vs. the Fiend, plus a Women’s Title match between Carmella and Bayley. I mean, neither of them are likely to be on the big show, but at least it’s a possibility now. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here are Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross for A Moment Of Bliss. In honor of Valentine’s Day, Nikki wants to talk about celebrity crushes. Nikki guesses Bliss’ as Brad Pitt and….that’s it apparently as they bring out their guest: Carmella. Cole to Graves: “Did you do anything special for Valentine’s Day?” Graves: “Leave my personal life out of this, but yes I did. I am the World Champion of love.” Carmella promises to win the Women’s Title tonight and show us why Mella is money.

We see photos of Carmella and Bayley being friends, with Carmella blaming Sasha Banks for their issues. Cue Bayley, who says she tried to take Carmella under her wing and teach her some things, though the fans don’t like the idea. Bayley talks about how much she beat up everyone since she became the champ so Carmella wants to fight right now.

Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Carmella

Carmella is challenging and avoids a charge in the corner. A hiptoss and shoulder drop Bayley and we’re off to the armbar. For once, it takes a rope break to get out of an armbar and Bayley shouts that Carmella needs to step up. That’s what she does with a pair of dropkicks for two but Bayley hits her with a Saito suplex. The high crossbody misses though and Carmella gets another near fall off a big boot. Bayley gets kicked outside and that means a suicide dive from Carmella. Back in and a high crossbody gives Carmella two but Bayley sends her into the announcers’ table as we take a break.

We come back with Carmella fighting out of a chinlock and sending Bayley into a boot in the corner. Some forearms put Bayley down but a quick Bayley to Belly gets two. Carmella catches her on top and a super hurricanrana gets two. The superkick connects but Bayley is smart enough to head outside. Carmella follows and gets posted, only to get faceplanted into the Cone of Silence back inside. That’s broken up in a hurry and Bayley grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin at 14:02.

Rating: C-. They had me wondering if the title was going to change hands here so well done on that front. I know Carmella isn’t in the upper echelon of wrestlers but she has the energy and gets the fans’ attention so putting her in what is likely going to be a short form feud is an acceptable idea. I’m still expecting Naomi to be the real challenger but for something that lasted two weeks, Carmella was fine for a quick spot.

Post match Bayley stays on Carmella but Naomi makes the save.

Post break Bayley says she won and that she’ll be defending at Super ShowDown because she’s a role model.

We see a clip from Day Of Royal Rumble focusing on a fan who was inspired to stay away from addition because of Lacey Evans. Lacey had her letter in her boot at the show.

Otis texts Mandy Rose before their date. Tucker comes in and tries to keep Otis calm but Otis wonders if Mandy might actually like him.

Sheamus vs. Shorty G./Apollo Crews

Just in case you didn’t get the idea yet. Sheamus gets jumped to start and Shorty hits some rolling Liger kicks in the corner. A running ax handle drops Shorty and Sheamus hits the series of forearms to the chest. Apollo gets a blind tag and Shorty clotheslines Sheamus to the floor so Apollo can moonsault him off the apron. Back in and a standing shooting star press gets two on Sheamus. The Brogue Kick knocks Shorty off the apron and another one finishes Apollo at 3:23.

Rating: D. This is WWE hammering it home even more than usual as Sheamus has beaten Shorty twice, beaten him up again, and then beaten him in a handicap match. I’m sure Sheamus will get to go somewhere now, or probably get to beat up someone else that doesn’t matter. It’s more of the same and Gable takes another beating because we didn’t get the point yet.

Carmella wants a rematch and doesn’t care where it happens.

Video on Goldberg.

Here’s Hulk Hogan for an interview via satellite to talk about being in the Hall of Fame twice. He’s been in the ring with Goldberg too and the Fiend better be ready for him. Hold on though because the following announcement has been paid for by the Firefly Fun House. Bray comes in, playing the guitar in black and white of course, and says that not he has the Universal Title, brother.

Huskus Pig comes in to say he’s been working on eating right, but succumbs to the temptations of chocolate. Bray: “I hope it’s not…..too sweet.” Hogan says being in the ring with Goldberg isn’t a joke. Bray doesn’t need jokes because he has a Fiend. Be careful, because there can always been room for another picture on the wall. Hogan walks out, saying he’ll see Wyatt at the Hall of Fame. This was one of the weirdest fever dream moments I can ever imagine and I loved it.

Here are Cesaro and Sami Zayn, the latter with a ukulele, for a protest concert against Braun Strowman and Elias. Before Sami can channel Bob Dylan, here’s Elias to cut them off. Elias knows that everyone in Vancouver knows what WWE stands for. Sami tells security to let Elias in because a lot of the song has to do with him. Cesaro gets a little carried away with the cowbell (Fans: “WE WANT COWBELL!”). They finally start the song and then go after Elias. Braun Strowman comes out for the save.

Naomi knows Bayley can’t beat her and wants the title shot.

Video on Otis and Mandy Rose.

We go to the restaurant where Mandy is waiting for Otis, who is rather nervous. He brings flowers but Dolph Ziggler comes up to Mandy instead. Ziggler sits down as Otis comes in, sees them, drops the flowers, and leaves crushed.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is coming to Los Angeles.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Roman Reigns/???

Before the match, Miz asks why the Usos are already missing after being back a month. Morrison has been back for a month and he’s right here. Reigns has a mystery partner and that would be….Daniel Bryan. Hang on though as here’s King Corbin, who was banned from wrestling tonight, with a ticket to have a seat. Joined in progress with Bryan kicking at Morrison, knocking Miz off the apron, and then hitting him with a suicide dive.

The missile dropkick plants Morrison and Bryan gets in the early nipup. The YES Kicks have Morrison in more trouble and there’s a hurricanrana to put him down again. Morrison knocks him outside though and Miz sends Bryan into the barricade. Reigns hits a huge dive over the top onto everyone though and we take a break with Corbin being annoyed. Back with Bryan in trouble as Morrison gets two off a slingshot elbow.

The chinlock doesn’t last long so Morrison kicks him in the head and brings Miz back in. Miz crotches Bryan on top but Bryan ties him in the Tree of Woe. Being smart though, Morrison tags himself in and knees Bryan in the face for two. Morrison misses a 450 and the hot tag brings in Roman for the house cleaning. Roman’s jumping clothesline misses, though the camera is fast enough to switch to cover it well enough.

The Superman Punch misses Miz and Morrison gets two off the Flying Chuck. Starship Pain is countered into a rollup and Reigns Superman Punches Morrison out of the air. The spear is cut off as well and Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale for two with Bryan having to make a save. Miz takes way too long to load up the running knee and gets Superman Punched (with the camera possibly showing it not coming close, though it might have grazed him) down. The spear gives Reigns the pin at 13:47.

Rating: B-. And you thought we might get through a week without Corbin getting involved. That’s the kind of thing that you can only dream of because it’s just not going to happen. This was an entertaining match with everyone working hard and trying, though I’m really not sure I see the need for Reigns to get the pin here when you can have Miz and Morrison, as in the #1 contenders, win here, perhaps off some Corbin interference.

Post match Corbin gets in a shot with the scepter to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I’m not sure what happened on this show but I feel like I missed something. There were three matches, a Hogan interview which didn’t say much and a big segment which lasted about two minutes. This show felt like it barely existed and while a few things were announced or felt like they mattered, the show felt like it was over before it started. Not a good week here, though the main event was pretty solid.

Results

Bayley b. Carmella – Rollup with feet on the ropes

Sheamus b. Shorty G./Apollo Crews – Brogue Kick to Crews

Roman Reigns/Daniel Bryan b. Miz/John Morrison – Spear to Miz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 10, 2020: In Case It Wasn’t Boring Enough

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 10, 2020
Location: Ford Center Evansville, Evansville, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re getting closer to the Royal Rumble and things started to pick up a lot this week on Raw. Therefore, you can probably assume the same thing here because these shows tend to follow each other. I’m sure we’ll get more from Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin now that the Usos are back, because this feud just needs to keep going. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

It’s MizTV to get things going. People have said Miz has changed since his issues with Bray Wyatt but last week was just a bad day. Sometimes people want to tell you to smile but he didn’t want to do that last week. He wants to apologize to Kofi Kingston for what he said last week but he has been going through a lot. One of the few bright spots has been the return of an old friend though, so here is the returning John Morrison as his guest.

We get a highlight package of Morrison’s time in WWE and he talks about his big comeback. He was promised new music, a new shirt, a team of pomeranians pulling him to the ring at the Royal Rumble (Morrison: “Small dogs only because there’s only one big dog around here.”), but he’s been doing some thinking. The more he thinks about last week, the more disappointed he is in the fans. Miz had one bad day and the fans say he sucks?

These people don’t know what it’s like to be in the ring but here’s New Day to interrupt. Big E. thinks Miz is such a bad actor that he couldn’t be cast as the back end of a centipede. With that image out of the way, Kofi talks about how Miz should have just said he had a bad day and it would have been so much better. Miz respects Kofi’s six month reign as WWE Champion but not the six seconds it took him to lose the title right back. Kofi says Miz is changing and he sucks….and that’s it in an abrupt ending as we need a commercial.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Morrison and big E. are on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Kofi dropkicking him into the corner before we go to a far too long look at the commentary table. Miz knees him in the ribs as Morrison asks why Kofi didn’t give Big E. a title shot during his six months as champion. Kofi elbows him in the face as Big E. explains that the team is a brotherhood and they were all World Champion at the same time. A suicide dive takes Miz out but he shoves Kofi into Big E. as we take a break.

Back with Kofi fighting out of a chinlock with Morrison and Big E. off commentary. Miz goes after the knee to cut Kofi off and hits some YES Kicks. The Skull Crushing Finale is blocked and Kofi gets two off the SOS. Miz charges into a kick to the face in the corner but kicks the knee out of the air and slaps on the Figure Four. With that broken up, Morrison dives onto Big E. and the distracted Kofi walks into the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 11:29.

Rating: C. You knew the 50/50 booking was coming as soon as this match was announced as we set up a likely Tag Team Title match at the Rumble. That’s a rather interesting match on paper and I can go for cocky Morrison as something for him to do. It’s not like this show is dying for faces as you could argue Otis is one of the top faces on the show at this point.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with Bray saying he loves everyone here. That feels special but not everyone is worthy. He means Daniel Bryan because whatever the opposite of what love is is what HE feels about Bryan. Daniel has been naughty lately and he’s in a heap of trouble at the Royal Rumble.

First, the Fiend wanted him to remember, and we get some clips of Bryan’s time in the Wyatt Family, plus his rebellion. Then he wanted to change Bryan, with clips of the haircut. Now that Bryan wants the title, HE wants to destroy Bryan. Bray: “Bye! I love you! Not you Daniel!” I’m as shocked as you are that WWE actually remembered a history between these two from so long ago but it’s rather nice to see for a change.

Here’s Elias for a song. He sings about the Royal Rumble, including about how he’ll win and how much more interesting he is than Brock, mainly because he’s actually here.

Alexa Bliss vs. Mandy Rose

Bliss and Nikki Cross are both in the Rumble. They shove each other to start and Bliss doesn’t like it, earning Rose a slap to the face. Another slap puts Rose on the floor for a baseball slide but Sonya offers a distraction. Cross breaks that up but Mandy gets in a knee to the head for two. They trade kicks to the face and a double clothesline puts them both down. Bliss is up first with Insult To Injury….and here’s Heavy Machinery with the cake. The distraction lets Rose grab a rollup for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D. What was this supposed to be? They needed to have the freshly face Bliss lose to the distraction rollup here? Right after they announced her as one of the first names in the Rumble? This felt like one of the most standard WWE booking tropes around and it came after a match that seemed to exist to fill time until the finish. I like the Mandy and Otis stuff though, just because of the weird charisma that Otis has.

Mandy smiles at Otis.

Lacey Evans vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Bayley pops up on screen to say Sasha is AWOL tonight and even a jar head like Lacey can understand that. Bayley is here tonight because she has to be so Lacey talks about how she loves to be in the heartland. She wants a title match tonight but Bayley isn’t her kid and won’t be doing what Lacey says. Lacey goes to the back and gets jumped by Bayley, who says put on her mom jeans and go home. Referees break it up.

We recap last week’s main event with the Fiend attacking Daniel Bryan.

Bryan says Fiend wants a lot and Bryan does remember the Wyatt Family. He also remembers outsmarting them and Fiend must not be happy with that. Then Fiend wants him to change so Bryan feels more dangerous. The one thing Fiend can change about him is that he can’t be broken. Ramblin Rabbit pops up on screen behind him and offers to tell Bryan the secret to defeating the Fiend but Bray grabs him and says snitches get snitches. Bryan nods a bit. I need scenes of Bryan trying to meet with Rabbit in secret to get information, preferably in wacky costumes with false identities.

Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title and Nakamura has Sami Zayn and Cesaro with him. Nakamura avoids a charge in the corner to start and starts striking away but runs into a big boot. Now the running splash in the corner connects but Sami pulls Nakamura to the floor before a second can hit. A distraction lets Nakamura post Strowman and we take a break. Back with Nakamura kicking Strowman down for two and putting on the chinlock.

Another kick to the face looks to set up a middle rope shot to the head, only to have Strowman clothesline him out of the air. The forearm to the chest gets two but Nakamura hits a running dropkick. A running knee to the head connects for two more but Strowman is back with a spinebuster. Cesaro tries to bring in a chair and Nakamura tries to bring in the title but Strowman just powerslams him for the pin at 9:35.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this one and I could go for another one, even though I’m not sure I can imagine Strowman winning the title. That’s his deal: look unstoppable in the build and then get stopped when it matters most. Normally I would say he has to win this time but I’ve said it so many times that I don’t believe it myself anymore.

Post match Strowman holds up the title but Sami runs in and takes it back.

Sheamus calls Shorty G. an example of everything wrong with Smackdown since he left. Small is something to be crushed and disposed of because size does matter. Sheamus wants to embrace chaos.

Bryan finds a present in his locker room. It’s a deformed Ramblin Rabbit, who has had half of his head ripped off.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat before the main event. He’s been dealing with King Corbin and his friends so Reigns knew he needed friends. This time he needed more though so he needed family. This is going to be his year and he’s going to win the Royal Rumble so he can move on and main event Wrestlemania for the fifth time. He’ll do it with the Usos by his side.

Cue the Usos to say they have this show on lockdown. Corbin disrespected the family with the dog food but this brings out Corbin and Ziggler to say the three of them are scared. Reigns would love to beat up Corbin twice in one night so they should fight twice at the Rumble. Corbin agrees and is now in the Rumble as well. The Usos hit big dives and the main event is next.

Usos vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Jimmy shoulders Ziggler down to start and it’s a double elbow drop for two. Corbin comes in for a clothesline and Jimmy gets caught in the wrong corner. Some right hands in the corner stagger Corbin a bit and a jumping enziguri puts him down. Jimmy goes up but here’s the Revival to distract him, meaning Ziggler can send him into the barricade.

Cue Reigns (Why did he leave?) to beat up the Revival and we take a break. Back with Jey hitting the running hip attack in the corner but diving onto Corbin, who pulls him out of the air. Corbin sends Jey into Reigns so Jimmy superkicks Ziggler to set up the Superfly Splash. Back up and Corbin gets speared down by Reigns for the DQ at 8:55.

Rating: C. You knew someone was going to get disqualified here as the Usos may be back but we can’t have Corbin and Ziggler lose because they’re the major heels. The Usos looked like their old selves and that’s rather good as they’re still one of the best teams in the world. Just find someone more interesting for them to face.

Post match Robert Roode returns and hits the Glorious DDT on Reigns on the floor. The Usos get laid out as well and it’s a spinebuster/elbow drop to put Reigns through the table to end the show. Just in case you weren’t overwhelmed by the levels of boring in Corbin and Ziggler already, now Roode is back.

Overall Rating: D+. Not a very good show here, though again you can see where each of the stories are going and you know what they’re going for in each case. Now that doesn’t mean that they’re very good or interesting, but that’s more about the booking and the way the wrestlers are presented. Tonight we had two distraction finishes, a failed distraction finish and a DQ. That’s not much on a show that included two half hour segment/match portions. There are good parts to the show but the presentation isn’t that interesting and it’s becoming more and more of a problem.

Results

The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Skull Crushing Finale

Mandy Rose b. Alexa Bliss – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Running powerslam

King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 3, 2020: Many Happy Returns

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 3, 2020
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the first Smackdown of the new year and we are on the road to the Royal Rumble. That could mean a lot of things but one of them is likely to be more build towards Daniel Bryan vs. the Fiend II. I’m curious to see where things go, though King Corbin and Dolph Ziggler are in the main event to temper my interest. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Bryan becoming #1 contender last week.

Miz comes up to Bryan and tells him to defeat the Fiend for everyone.

Opening sequence.

Sasha Banks/Bayley vs. Lacey Evans/Dana Brooke vs. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

Banks messes with Lacey’s mind to start before bringing Nikki in instead. That means Brooke gets to come in for one off a slam and everything breaks down for a bit. Lacey is sent outside and Bliss dropkicks Banks. Bayley pulls Bliss off the ropes though and the Meteora in the corner gives Banks two. Banks chokes her a bit but everything breaks down again and they wind up on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Brooke cleaning house, including a snap suplex for two on Banks. Everything breaks down again until it’s Bayley stomping on Brooke some more. Brooke fights out of the corner so Banks knees her in the face to set up Bayley’s belly to back suplex for two. An enziguri finally gets Brooke out of trouble and it’s back to Lacey for the standing moonsault on Bayley.

The slingshot Bronco Buster looks to set up the springboard moonsault but Banks pulls Bayley away. That’s only good for two as everyone makes the save so Lacey has to slip out of a double powerbomb. The Woman’s Right hits Banks and Dana adds the Swanton (with a thud) for the pin at 13:17.

Rating: D+. This was a near mess with the match just going and going until someone got the fall. The match didn’t have much of a flow or structure to it and Dana getting the win was rather surprising. In theory this gives Dana and Lacey a Tag Team Title shot but Lacey seems in line to face Bayley so it could be some combination of both.

We recap Dolph Ziggler crushing Otis’ fruitcake.

Mandy Rose comes up to Otis, who didn’t see the fruitcake get destroyed. His mama did though and she’s not happy. Tucker comes up to say they have a match so the two of them leave, with Mandy actually looking sad.

Miz runs into New Day but isn’t in the mood to celebrate the new year. Big E.: “I watched the balls drop.” Kofi: “There’s only one ball. What were you watching?” Big E: “I don’t know!” Kofi tries to make Miz feel better by saying Miz won the most titles in the 2010s, though Big E. points out that Miz was tied with Kofi himself. That’s not enough for Miz, because Fiend violated his family’s home. The pancakes are turned over and a match seems to be made for later.

Here’s Elias for a song. This one is about how many things need to change in 2020, like Shane McMahon going to Raw and Revival being harder to watch than Dolph Ziggler’s comedy act. He also implies that he’ll be in the Royal Rumble.

We look at Revival getting beaten up in the Miracle on 34th Street Fight.

Revival doesn’t like being made to look like bad jokes. They want respect in the new year but here’s Chad Gable to say embrace who you are. Revival makes fun of Gable for being short, but Gable says they don’t bother him anymore. His new motto is Rise Over Size (egads) and the result is Dash vs. Gable tonight.

Shorty G. vs. Dash Wilder

Scott Dawson is on commentary for more short jokes as Wilder gets two off a suplex. Gable is back with a high crossbody for two before grabbing the ankle lock. That’s reversed into a rollup for two, with Cole calling Gable inspirational. Dawson: “He’s inspirational because he’s short???” Another ankle lock makes Wilder tap at 2:52.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Kofi sweeps the leg and hits a quick splash for two, setting up the monkey flip to frustrate Miz even more. A back elbow to the jaw drops Miz again and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Back in and Miz kicks away at the ribs in the corner, setting up a running knee for a bonus. Miz charges into a kick to the head though and Kofi adds a top rope chop to the head. Miz’s reverse DDT is blocked but so is the SOS. The Skull Crushing Finale doesn’t work either and Kofi rolls him up for the pin at 3:54.

Rating: C-. These two are always good for a passable enough match and it seems Miz is a heel all over again. To be fair that fits him better, as it’s pretty hard to cheer for him when he failed against Wyatt at the pay per view. Just let him be a heel again because neither face run has worked for the most part.

Post match Miz jumps Kofi to end the face experiment again. Miz shouts that he’s given the fans everything.

Daniel Bryan says he’s winning the title at the Rumble, so Roman Reigns enters the Rumble. That would make Bryan vs. Reigns at Wrestlemania so Bryan says bring it on. They’re ready for their tag match tonight.

Post break Cathy Kelly knocks on Miz’s door but John Morrison answers, saying Miz has nothing left to say tonight.

Otis vs. Drew Gulak

Before the match, Gulak says that he is an expert in matters of the heart, which means he knows Mandy would never date Otis. We have a POWER POINT PRESENTATION but Otis jumps him to start in a hurry. A suplex sends Gulak flying and another drops him in a hurry. There’s a gorilla press but hang on as Dolph Ziggler is hitting on Mandy in the back. Otis throws Gulak down and hits the Caterpillar, setting up a Vader Bomb for the pin at 2:27.

Braun Strowman vs. Cesaro

Cesaro has Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura with him. They do the power lockup to start with Cesaro getting launched into the corner. Strowman cleans house and chases the other two off of the apron as we take a break. Back with Cesaro diving into a choke but reversing into a quick sleeper.

That’s broken up in a hurry so Cesaro hits a running uppercut in the corner. Another misses though and Strowman heads to the floor for the train of shoulders. Sami comes in for a distraction so Cesaro can send Braun into the post. The Neuralizer is countered into the running powerslam to finish Cesaro at 8:12.

Rating: D+. Just a match here with the break eating up a good chunk of it. Strowman is pretty obviously getting the Intercontinental Title shot at the Rumble and he might as well win the thing. It’s not like it matters who wins it at this point so trading it to someone more popular might be an improvement over what we have at the moment.

Post match Nakamura hits Strowman with Kinshasa so the trio can leave.

We recap Roman Reigns attacking King Corbin last week.

Roman Reigns/Daniel Bryan vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Corbin jumps Reigns at the bell and gets punched in the face for his efforts. It’s off to Ziggler, whose neckbreaker is easily broken up so Reigns can hit a big boot. Bryan comes in and kicks away….but we have the Fiend laughing and lights flickering. Back from a break with Reigns kicking Corbin in the face but running into Deep Six for two. Corbin sends him into the steps and Ziggler begs Reigns to do something.

The Superman Punch finally gets Reigns out of trouble and it’s back to Bryan to pick up the pace. Bryan elbows Ziggler down and hits the YES Kicks, only to miss the big one. Ziggler’s rollup is reversed into the LeBell Lock with Corbin making the save. Reigns spears Corbin and Bryan knees Ziggler….as the lights go out. The Fiend is here so Bryan hits him with a suicide dive.

Fiend gets posted but is right back with the Mandible Claw to send Bryan through the barricade. The Claw goes on again and there go the lights, meaning the Fiend is gone. Ziggler and Corbin jump Reigns as he goes to check on Bryan, meaning it’s time for the handcuffs and dog food. Cue the returning Usos for the save though, which is pretty long overdue. We’ll say the match ended at about 10:00.

Rating: C-. This was all just a means to get to the end of the match and that’s fine as it didn’t exactly overstay its welcome. That being said, this didn’t help hide the fact that Ziggler and Corbin aren’t exactly as interesting as a lot of the other people on the show, including the three other people involved in the match. Not a bad match or anything, but a means to an end more than anything on its own.

Overall Rating: C. While the wrestling wasn’t great, this show felt like it had stuff happening. There were four returns (only one of which we knew was coming) and you can see where the stories are going. Compare that to Raw where it feels like the stories either have no direction or are having twists thrown into them to keep things going. This may not be the most thrilling show, but it’s a structured show and doesn’t leave you wondering what you just watched. Unfortunately it doesn’t leave you overly entertained, but I’ll take that over Raw almost every day.

Results

Lacey Evans/Dana Brooke b. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross and Sasha Banks/Bayley – Swanton to Banks

Shorty G. b. Dash Wilder – Ankle lock

Kofi Kingston b. The Miz – Rollup

Otis b. Drew Gulak – Vader Bomb

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns b. Dolph Ziggler/King Corbin via DQ when the Fiend interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6