Monday Night Raw
Date: August 3, 2015
Location: SAP Center, San Jose, California
Commentators: Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We have less than three weeks to go until Summerslam and the big question is whether or not John Cena will be able to breathe well enough to challenge Seth Rollins for the World Title. Rollins broke Cena’s nose last week to put him on the shelf, but tonight is all about Brock Lesnar, who is back to address the issues with Undertaker from two weeks ago. Let’s get to it.

As you might expect, this show is dedicated to Rowdy Roddy Piper and we get a ten bell salute with the roster on stage in Hot Rod shirts.

We see the Piper tribute video, set to a song about never taking your life for granted.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Seth Rollins, in a NEVER SHUTS UP shirt to mock Cena, with something to say. Rollins says he’s the only person that can slow himself down but he has a problem with sympathy. Last week he destroyed John Cena’s nose and if a picture is worth 1000 words, then this video is priceless. We see the knee to the nose from last week (that’s four times tonight) and hear a THANK YOU ROLLINS chant from the crowd.

Rollins didn’t feel bad about what happened because he’ll break more noses down the line. However, it’s the first time he broke the nose of the face that runs this place. We see some post show pictures of Cena’s nose and my goodness it looks awful. As soon as Rollins saw that, he knew that it was time to stop the match and award him the US Title, but Cena took advantage of the sympathy and stole a win.

That will never happen again, so Rollins has a proposition for Cena: one more match at Summerslam, title for title. If Cena doesn’t accept, Cena should just forfeit the title to Rollins, who promises to walk out with the belt anyway. As for tonight, San Jose is the place to be. “Not because of any of you. It’s because I’m here.” This is the place where John Cena held his first US Open Challenge, but everyone knows Rollins can do anything Cena does even better, so let’s have a WWE World Heavyweight Championship Open Challenge…….now.

After a break, Jojo is in the ring to ask Rollins about the open challenge. There are two rules to this challenge: the opponent must be under 6’0 and under 200lbs. Therefore, the only option is El Torito. Torito’s music starts playing but that’s not who comes out.

WWE World Title: Seth Rollins vs. Neville

The fans are behind Neville as he spins out of a wristlock to start. Neville flips over him in the corner and Seth gets caught in the running hurricanrana but is smart enough to roll away before the Red Arrow can launch. Instead it’s a cross body to put Rollins on the floor and a huge corkscrew dive to take him out as we go to a break. Back with the champion in control and getting two off a running clothesline.

Off to a chinlock for a bit before Neville comes back by superkicking Rolling out of the air. A German suplex off the ropes followed by a dropkick get another two, followed by the delayed German for a third straight near fall. The Pedigree is countered into a rollup for a two so close that the fans gasp at the kickout.

Seth goes up top but Neville is right there with a top rope hurricanrana, setting up the Red Arrow for three but Rollins had a foot on the ropes. Dang these are some hot near falls. JBL has the right idea: “COVER HIM AGAIN!” Neville takes his sweet time before going up again and only hits the mat. The Pedigree retains Rollins’ title at 13:16.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of match that Rollins needed after last week’s loss. It’s no classic or anything but Rollins won clean over a guy he should have beaten. Neville loses nothing by getting pinned and Rollins gets a good looking win. What more can you possibly ask for in a TV match?

New Day/Ascension vs. Lucha Dragons/Los Matadores

Rematch from Smackdown with the Prime Time Players on commentary again. Los Matadores double team Kofi to start and a springboard flip dive gets two for Diego. Viktor comes in and kicks Diego to the floor and we go to a break. Back with Diego getting dropkicked down for two before it’s off to Viktor for a jumping knee to the face. Diego dives over for the hot tag to Sin Cara as everything breaks down. Cara hits a bunch of dives to the floor and Kalisto gets two on Kofi off a high cross body. Xavier kicks Torito away but the distraction lets Kofi hit Trouble in Paradise for the pin on Kalisto at 8:24.

Rating: D+. Why do I bother watching Smackdown? They did the same match on Smackdown but for some reason this one matters more. I’m guessing we get New Day vs. Prime Time Players for a third straight pay per view because Kalisto rolling Viktor up on Smackdown to win the same match doesn’t count.

Bella Twins vs. Charlotte/Becky Lynch

In pre-match video inserts, the Bellas say the Divas Revolution started when Nikki won the Divas Title and Charlotte/Becky/Paige dub themselves the Submission Sorority. I’ve heard worse names and at least it’s not Team “Insert Name Here”. Becky takes over on Brie to start before it’s off to Charlotte vs. Nikki with the champ coming in off a blind tag. They trade front facelocks until Charlotte grabs a cravate.

A Figure Eight attempt is countered and Nikki pulls Charlotte off the middle rope for two. Brie comes back in for a chinlock but Charlotte fights out (because it’s Brie Bella) and tags in Becky to clean house. The Disarm-Her has Brie in trouble until a rope is grabbed and Nikki takes Becky down as we go to a break.

Back with Becky fighting out of Nikki’s chinlock but walking into a facebuster for two. Brie stomps away in the corner (thank goodness she stopped doing the lame attempts at YES Kicks) and gets two of her own off a bulldog. Becky fights out of a chinlock and makes the tag to Charlotte, who runs over Nikki with a neckbreaker and spear. Everything breaks down and Nikki plants Charlotte with a spinebuster for two. Charlotte gets right back up though and the Figure Eight makes Nikki tap at 13:14.

Rating: C. I really don’t like it when WWE wastes my time. I’d assume this sets up Charlotte’s title shot at Summerslam, where I’d bet quite heavily that Nikki retains through shenanigans to get to the middle of September and the record because Heaven forbid a current WWE Diva doesn’t hold a record that the fans only care about because Cole and company keep telling us about it.

Team Bad isn’t pleased with all the attention Paige is getting so tonight it’s Paige vs. Naomi. Naomi even throws in an insult to Ronda Rousey for claiming that she’s the baddest woman on the planet. Something tells me that’s not going anywhere, but my goodness it would be entertaining if it did.

It’s time for MizTV with Miz in a Hot Rod shirt and a kilt. Before he gets going, Miz says that there wouldn’t be a MizTV, a Heartbreak Hotel, a Highlight Reel or any other talk show without the original Piper’s Pit, because Piper was the best ever at this and he’ll be missed. Here here Miz.

After a legitimately cool moment, Miz talks about his accomplishments and describes himself as on fire right now. That brings him to his guests tonight: two men who have also been on fire recently: Cesaro and Kevin Owens. Kevin is out first and sucks up to Miz a bit by saying he owns all of Miz’s movies on DVD. Before Cesaro can get much further though, here is Cesaro in a suit to interrupt.

Miz makes sure Cesaro isn’t here for a fight but Cesaro says he’s just here to hear what Walk Owens Walk has to say. Kevin gets right to the point: Cesaro is jealous of him because of Owens accomplishing all of the things that Cesaro never could, including beating John Cena. Owens says Cesaro has been whining about missing all those life moments, but no matter what he does, Cesaro will never be better than Owens because Cesaro lacks the love for this business.

Cesaro says the real lack of respect and love is shown every time Owens walks away from a match because it makes Owens an embarrassment. Kevin is ready to fight but says tonight isn’t the right price. “Yeah why don’t you do what you do best and walk Owens walk.” Miz tells Cesaro to go do something but Owens jumps them both from behind, only to run away when Cesaro gets up. Good, solid program building segment here.

We get a clip of Ronda Rousey paying tribute to Roddy Piper after her win on Saturday night.

Rusev vs. Mark Henry

Can we just have Henry tap out now and save five minutes? Rusev stomps away in the corner but gets shoved down, only to come back with a dropkick for one. Off to a front facelock from the Russian, followed by a pair of jumping superkicks for the pin at 2:05.

Rusev gives him a third superkick for good measure.

Clip of Swerved.

Bray Wyatt rips the petals off a flower and compares it to Roman Reigns when you rip away everything that the world sees. Roman is no different than anyone else. Harper warned Ambrose but Dean chose wrong. Sheamus comes in and says he’s going to make this short and painful. Bray likes the idea of the enemy of his enemy being his friend.

Zack Ryder vs. King Barrett

Barrett says Ryder is King of the Internet (wasn’t that like three years ago?) but there’s no crown on his head. A knee to the ribs puts Ryder down and it’s off to an early chinlock. Ryder fights up and hits the Broski Boot but Barrett throws him into the buckle to break up the Rough Ryder, setting up the Bull Hammer to give Barrett the pin at 1:56.

Here’s Paul Heyman to talk about the Undertaker attacking Brock Lesnar two weeks back. We see a clip of the end of Battleground, but Heyman says that’s a different Undertaker than we’ve seen running roughshod over the WWE in the last 25 years. Would you ever see the old Undertaker kicking Brock Lesnar in the groin? Of course not, because the old Undertaker wasn’t scared of anything. We see a clip of the brawl from two weeks ago and Heyman brings up the 1 in 22-1 before bringing out Brock himself.

Lesnar doesn’t immediately get in the ring but rather throws some steps inside. With Brock standing on the steps, Heyman has a story to tell us. After the beating last year, Undertaker called Vince McMahon and begged for a rematch with Brock at this year’s Wrestlemania. Vince wisely said no because he knew what would happen the next time the Undertaker faces Brock, leaving Undertaker to do what he did at Battleground this year.

The WWE had to book the match at this point because the match was going to have to happen somewhere. Heyman says this isn’t just the rematch of the year, decade or century. This is the rematch that is bigger than Wrestlemania. Undertaker may look big and bad but he’s going to Suplex City. Last time Undertaker needed a year to recover, but this time he’ll rest in pieces as his career receives last rites at the hands of the conqueror. Heyman had me at that bigger than Wrestlemania line.

Here are the same Cena pictures from earlier tonight.

Paige vs. Naomi

They lock up to start and Paige actually gets a two count out of it. That’s a new idea. Paige takes her into the corner but Naomi catches her in her corner headscissors and shake which does nothing, aside from look stupid of course. A kick to the head gets two for Naomi and it’s time for a chinlock.

That goes nowhere so Naomi bends the ribs around the post and drives Paige back first into the apron. Paige fights out of another chinlock and scores with a fall away slam before sending Naomi face first into the buckle. A kick to the head staggers Paige but Naomi misses a high cross body, allowing Paige to slap on the PTO for the submission at 7:28.

Rating: C. At least Paige got to win something for a change. I like the submissions idea a lot as it fits their characters and adds a new dimension to the Divas instead of their one or two signature moves. Naomi has gotten lost in the shuffle of this whole thing but it’s nice to see her getting some time like this.

Clips of Neville vs. Rollins.

Stardust laughs at Neville for listening to the fans chant ONE MORE TIME and losing earlier.

Roddy Piper tribute video.

Ambrose and Reigns say they’re all out of bubblegum. It’s time to bust some heads and Orton comes in to agree, as long as he gets Sheamus to himself.

Arrow’s Stephen Amell will be here next week.

Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt/Sheamus vs. Randy Orton/Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns

Ambrose and Harper get things going with Dean throwing Luke outside. Everyone else comes in for a brawl and the villains are knocked to the floor, setting up Dean’s big elbow to take us to a break. Back with Reigns taking Sheamus’ head off with a running right hand to take the fight back outside. That goes nowhere so Reigns comes back in and says he wants Wyatt but it’s Harper first. Dean comes in to hammer away in the corner but Harper dropkicks him in the face to get a breather. Now Wyatt is willing to come in and hammer away before knocking Dean off the top and out to the floor for a rare second break.

Back again with Harper and Ambrose trading slams, allowing Dean to make the tag off to Orton for the powerslam to Wyatt. Sheamus takes a right hand as well and Orton counters the Rock Bottom into the backbreaker to put everyone not named Randy down. Harper breaks up the RKO to Bray with the discus lariat before getting dropkicked out to the floor by Dean.

That earns Ambrose a big boot to the face but Reigns takes Harper out, leaving us with Roman vs. Sheamus in the ring. Everything breaks down again and Reigns takes Bray and Sheamus down with apron boots. Both guys get Superman Punches to go with them but it’s Harper again with a superkick to take Roman down. Ambrose tries to dive on Harper but has to fight out of Sister Abigail first. An RKO drops Wyatt and Sheamus eats Reigns’ spear for the pin at 16:25.

Rating: C+. Nice main event tag here with the good guys looking awesome and Harper continuing to show how awesome he can be in the ring by doing things that just aren’t normal for someone his size. This helped set up Summerslam a bit more as you can pretty much guarantee Orton vs. Sheamus and the tag match. Good stuff here.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show but as is the case so often with Raw, the length took away a lot of the good feelings it had built up. They’re building to what should be a strong Summerslam, but these Raw’s aren’t the easiest to sit through. They just go on too long and whatever they have going is often replaced by thoughts of “let this end already.”

Results

Seth Rollins b. Neville – Pedigree

New Day/Ascension b. Lucha Dragons/Los Matadores – Trouble in Paradise to Kalisto

Charlotte/Becky Lynch b. Bella Twins – Figure Eight to Nikki

Rusev b. Mark Henry – Jumping superkick

King Barrett b. Zack Ryder – Bull Hammer

Paige b. Naomi – PTO

Randy Orton/Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus/Bray Wyatt/Luke Harper – Spear to Sheamus

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Uh…..I really don’t have much of an intro here. We’re coming up on Summerslam and this is one of the Raw’s on the way there. Let’s get to it.

The big opening talking segment was, of course, the Authority and Seth Rollins. The idea of this one was to make Raw a night of first, including Big Show vs. Dean Ambrose. In the words of Jon Stewart, let me stop you right there. Much like a lot of these first time EVER matches, just because it’s never happened before doesn’t mean that it’s a good idea. I mean, we could have Blake from NXT come up and fight Hornswoggle. IT’S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE so that makes it cool right? I don’t know of anyone who would go out of their way to see Big Show vs. Ambrose, nor do I see a lot of fans being happy with the outcome.

Other than that, we’re also getting, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER SO YOU KNOW IT’S AWESOME: Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton, Paige vs. Sasha Banks (well for the first time on Raw at least) and Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte. In other words we have “man Owens gets to lose again?”, “that could be good” and “well at least we have something to look at.” This is their big solution for the ratings being so far down?

Finally, Rollins ran his mouth for a long time until Cena came down and thought he should get a title shot against Rollins for the first time ever on Raw. HHH thought it was a great idea but made it a US Title shot instead, which pretty much sealed the winner, or at least who was walking out with the title, as soon as the words were out of his mouth. We’ll come back to the match later for a change, but the talking segment took too long to get to the point.

Big Show beat Dean Ambrose via countout, with the idea being that Ambrose kept fighting but couldn’t put Big Show down. I like the plan, but Big Show has lost to people like Miz recently. So Miz is tougher/smarter than Ambrose? I don’t know of anyone who would buy that but it’s what we’re supposed to believe now?

In theory they’re building up Big Show for someone, but they could have given anyone a rub with the same ending. Ambrose looks weaker than usual by comparison but we’re supposed to cheer him anyway because Dean is bulletproof, which WWE interprets as loss proof. Dean sidestepping a post match spear was supposed to make up for it or something but as is so typically the case, it doesn’t work like WWE thinks it does.

Neville beat Fandango and listened to Stardust rant about saving the WWE Universe from false hope. The more I see of this feud the more I like it, but I have a bad feeling they won’t get enough time at Summerslam. You know, the FOUR HOUR show.

Paige and Sasha traded some insults before Sasha made Paige tap clean. This was a solid, long match with some arm work for a story, but more important than anything else, the match felt important. I wanted to see where it was going instead of having two girls out there to waste everyone’s time. That’s a major step forward and a completely new way to look at the division.

Rusev gave Summer Rae a dog named Ziggler and a fish with no head. Lana came out, beat Summer up and shoved her face into the fish. I really don’t think this needs any further explanation.

The Lucha Dragons beat Los Matadores as the Prime Time Players were on commentary. This was little more than an excuse to have the New Day come out, though it seems to set up a multi-team title match at Summerslam. The idea is fine, but again it makes last week’s loss look like a waste of time.

Bray Wyatt and Luke Harper did a long in ring promo where they talked about Harper coming home. Since this was Wyatt though, it took him five minutes to get to the point, even though we knew the point in the first place. It was still effective though and you can feel the old Wyatt vibes coming back. Now, that being said, none of it matters if the Wyatts are treated like jobbers all over the place, especially Bray himself.

Becky Lynch/Charlotte beat Nikki Bella/Alicia Fox in a match taking place FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER when Lynch made Fox tap. As usual, there was nothing of note involving Nikki because she isn’t the longest reigning Divas Champion yet and therefore nothing can happen, at least not until there’s roughly a week before the record is broken.

Kevin Owens and Randy Orton had a pretty lame match until Sheamus came in for the DQ. Owens is pretty firmly in that transitional period between main eventer and midcard but you can see him trending down. Cesaro came in for a save but ate a powerbomb, likely setting up a tag match at some point in the near future. There’s nothing wrong with combining two feuds into one.

The big main event was a good fight between Cena and Rollins where Cena retained the US Title. They beat each other up and put on an entertaining match as you would expect, but of course the story here is John Cena’s nose, which pretty much erupted due to a knee to the face.

The big question now is whether Cena is going to be back for Summerslam. They never actually announced Cena vs. Rollins for the pay per view, but at least there’s an easy reason why Cena isn’t fighting. Everyone say the nose and it was hardly something you could hide. Keep Cena off TV until Summerslam if you can, but if you can’t……I’m really not sure what you do. Make Undertaker vs. Lesnar a triple threat with Rollins for the title I guess, because there aren’t a lot of other options, unless you throw Orton out there again. I mean, it’s not like you can give someone new a shot right?

This show was a copy of last week’s but with Cena and Rollins in Lesnar and Undertaker’s places. They’re both one idea shows with some midcard stuff thrown in, and that’s all these shows should have been. The main event and what should be the other main event assuming Cena can breathe by then are both set and you can build the rest of the card from here. It’s one of those shows where you knew what was going to happen from the opening bell but there’s nothing wrong with that. Good, effective show this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 27, 2015
Location: Chesapeake Energy Arena, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

Summerslam is still coming and tonight’s big question is what is going to co-headline the show alongside the showdown between Brock Lesnar and Undertaker. Seth Rollins vs. John Cena in a champion vs. champion match has been teased, but it would be interesting to see if Cena holds onto the title until Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s big brawl between Undertaker and Lesnar with the entire roster trying to keep them apart.

Here’s the Authority and Seth Rollins to open the show. HHH says this is a night of firsts and we’re going to start with a major announcements. For the first time ever, Summerslam is going to be a special four hour event, of course with Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar as the main event. Tonight is going to be something special tonight as well as Big Show goes one on one with Dean Ambrose. That’s uh, quite the announcement there Trips.

On top of that we have Paige vs. Sasha Banks and Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton. Stephanie brings up the Divas Revolution with Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte. Rollins takes the mic and brags about how amazing he is, calling himself one of the greatest WWE Champions of all time, but here’s John Cena to disagree. Cena doesn’t like the idea of Rollins calling himself the greatest of all time because Rollins is a joke. On a night like tonight, we need to find out which one of them is right.

If tonight is a night of firsts, we need to find out if Seth Rollins really is a man, so how about Cena vs. Rollins for the World Title tonight? Seth says Cena needs to earn a shot but Stephanie wants to put it up to the people because she can’t remember if she’s a face or a heel. The fans love the idea and even start a YES chant so Stephanie says NO, complete with a little dance. HHH thinks the idea has merit though so instead it’s going to be a US Title match with Rollins having the chance to be a dual champion.

The Austin Podcast returns next week with……Paige? That’s not quite Taker or Sting but at least they look better in leather shorts.

Dean Ambrose vs. Big Show

This is actually fallout from two weeks ago on Smackdown where Ambrose countered Big Show’s chokeslam through a table with a DDT. Miz is on commentary, almost guaranteeing Ambrose loses because WWE doesn’t think stuff through. Show takes him into the corner to start and rips Dean’s shirt open before running him over with a shoulder. The fans aren’t pleased and it’s nice to see that last week’s promo wasn’t meant to be yet another face turn.

Dean low bridges him to the floor and a baseball slide sets up a suicide dive but dives into a chop as we take a WAY too early break. Back with Show working on the leg but has to stop to tie his boot. Miz rants about Ryback missing time, because he could beat up a staph infection. Ambrose’s sleeper has as much effect as anyone’s sleeper has on Big Show (we need the tranquilizer dart that Angle used) and Show goes old school with the Alley Oop for two. Another chokeslam is countered with another DDT but the rebound lariat is countered with the chokeslam for two.

Show does the smart thing by just chokeslamming him again but Dean rolls to the floor to lay in the light of the video screen because THE RING SKIRT IS A VIDEO SCREEN. Yes I know it has been for a long time but it looks stupid. Dean gets back in but a superkick puts him on the floor again, setting up a spear to flatten Dean one more time. Ambrose dives in at nine, only to be thrown outside for a third time in two minutes. This time Show throws him inside but Dean kicks him away for a suicide dive. Show is waiting for him with the KO Punch though and it’s a countout at 10:30.

Rating: D+. WHAT??? Did we really just watch Dean Ambrose get beaten up by Big Show for ten minutes before they finally just let Big Show knock him out? Are we really back to the annual Big Show push that no one but WWE wants to see? I mean, at least it’s not a pin but my goodness WWE: stop doing this. The guy is 43 years old and going over Dean Ambrose on Raw.

Dean still won’t stay down so Show loads up a spear, which goes right through the barricade instead. Ah so he’s a smart loser.

Neville vs. Fandango

Fandango tries a powerbomb but opts for a clothesline instead. JBL: “When in doubt, hit your opponent really hard.” A Gory Stretch of all things has Neville in trouble but he comes back with his series of quick strikes. Having never watched a Neville match, Fandango heads outside in front of the ramp, setting up the big flip dive. Back inside and the Red Arrow is good for the pin on Fandango at 1:54.

Post match, Stardust comes on screen and rips up a comic book while talking about wining and dining with kings and queens. No one wants to talk about the strange but don’t worry because he’ll rescue the WWE Universe and there is nothing Neville can do to stop him.

Paige gives Charlotte and Becky Lynch a pep talk when Team Bad comes in to trade insults. Paige wins by saying she was the first NXT Women’s Champion.

Sasha Banks vs. Paige

Non-title. Sasha’s Sky’s The Limit theme makes its Raw debut here. Their lockup goes to the mat and then out to the floor without a break. Back in and Paige fires off her elbows in the corner, followed by a fall away slam for two. We hit the hammerlock (nice little change of pace) before Paige drives Banks down into a Fujiwara armbar. Sasha tries to fight up but eats a superkick to put her on the floor with Paige diving on all of Team Bad as we take a break.

Back with Sasha holding a chinlock as everyone else has been ejected from ringside. The double knees to the chest in the corner get two and it’s back to the chinlock with Paige in trouble. That doesn’t last long though as Paige fights up and fires off a series of knees in the corner and the trio of clotheslines. A superkick looks to set up the PTO but instead it’s another knee to Sasha’s chest for two. Sasha hits a charge in the corner for two of her own, followed by a sloppy Bank Statement for the clean tap at 13:57.

Rating: B-. It’s not a classic or anything, but this was the first time in a LONG time that a women’s match on Raw actually felt serious instead of WWE trying to make it feel serious. This felt like a wrestling match between two very talented women and that’s not something you get from the Divas. This is a positive sign going forward and a huge win for Banks.

Rollins says he’ll win tonight because he beats the best that WWE throws at him every single time. Tonight, the future passes Cena by.

The Terminator (yes that Terminator) is in WWE 2K16.

Here are Rusev and Lana for a chat. Rusev says he’s smitten with her and wants to give Summer a present. First up: a puppy, who is so ugly that they have to name him Dog Ziggler. The second present is…..a headless fish. It’s a cold fish, so let’s name it Lana. Cue the real Lana who rants about Rusev trying to humiliate her. She should be ranting about how her accent slips a bit as she talks faster.

Lana goes on about Summer being a Lana ripoff and how Rusev is just trying to replace the real thing. Lana kicks Summer in the leg and put on an armbar while ripping at Summer’s hair. Summer goes face first into the fish and Lana leaves. This was, in a word, really stupid.

We see the same recap the opened the show. Saxton says Lesnar is back next week in the city that hosted last year’s Wrestlemania: San Jose, California.

Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores

The Prime Time Players are on commentary and this match is to move up the tag team rankings. Cara and Diego flip around to start before the Dragons double team Diego down for two. Kalisto slaps on an armbar as Titus makes fun of Darren’s shyness on commentary. It’s Diego coming back with a running clothesline to take over but Kalisto grabs the arm again to stop the comeback.

Cara’s springboard cross body is caught in midair and they drop him face first onto the post. Even Torito gets in some cheap shots (Titus: “THAT’S BULL!”) as Titus and JBL argue over Puerto Rican bullfighters. Fernando’s chinlock has Cara in more trouble and the slow offense continues with a front facelock. Who thought it was a good idea for a lucha team to wrestle a slow paced mat style?

Cara gets in a belly to back for a breather and the hot tag brings in Kalisto for a springboard tornado DDT. Cara swantons onto Diego on the floor but we’ve got New Day, with a sign saying Kofi is the REAL Mega Dad of the Year. Kalisto grabs a huricanrana for the pin on Diego at 8:05.

Rating: D+. So not only was it slow, but they’re basically saying that match last week where the champions lost means nothing because they just lost clean to another team. New Day vs. the Players isn’t much of a feud but it’s finally feeling like a story instead of just two teams having matches because the script says they should be.

Here are Wyatt and Harper with something to say. Well one of them with something to say at least. Bray thinks everyone here has a family and thinks most people here love their family. There’s this idea that if a family stays together, they can survive anything. That’s a lie though man. It’s a shame that people won’t tell their family the truth.

It’s in your house, your government and your places of worship: those that trust you the most are the ones you should fear the most. The truth shall set you free, but freedom comes at a very hefty price. A long time ago, Bray had a pet. It wasn’t the most charming one but Bray loved him all the same. That pet wanted to know what was over the hills and across the train tracks, so one day Bray loosened his chains and the pet ran away.

One day he came back, but the pet was different, partially because of a scar alongside his eye. The pet never left his side, but it would never be the same. That brings him to Harper, who was a damaged man that Bray picked up from the dirt and fixed him like a broken toy. One day, Bray knew he would have to set Harper free, but now Harper has come home. Harper says he didn’t know why he existed or why he was here, but his family found him.

Bray showed him the truth: this is all the people’s fault. They made him what he is when they shunned him but Bray saved him. When you pray for the rain, you best be prepared for the mud. Harper is ready to give his life for Bray, and Bray says he knows Harper would go through anything for him. That brings Wyatt back to Roman Reigns, who was told that this was just the beginning. If Reigns really cared for Dean Ambrose, he would tell Dean that he was in danger. This is Reigns’ hill to die on and Bray himself will seal Reigns’ fate. We’re here. Follow the buzzards.

Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte

Becky runs Nikki over to start before it’s off to Charlotte for a twisting rollup (Charlotte’s Web) for two. Off to Fox who has similar success as Charlotte drops a knee to the head. Nikki offers a distraction so Fox can get two off a northern lights suplex. Nikki comes back in for her pushups and some laughter before it’s off to Fox for a double arm crank with her feet in Charlotte’s back. She pulls on it so hard that Charlotte flips over onto her for two, allowing for the tag off to Becky. A t-bone suplex sends Fox flying as everything breaks down. Lynch’s Disarm-Her armbar makes Fox tap at 6:10.

Rating: C. Totally fine match here with no one really standing out. Again, the problem here is the lack of any reason for these matches to be taking place as no one can challenge for the title until AJ’s record comes down. The problem is we don’t really have a reason for the title to be a non-factor, but that’s life in WWE for you.

Look back at last week’s Tough Enough elimination and a list of the remaining competitors.

Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens

Sheamus is on commentary. Owens jaws a lot to start and they slug it out with Randy knocking him outside early on. Back in and Orton rakes his boot over Kevin’s face but Owens rolls right back to the floor. It’s Orton being sent face first into the post and a fall away slam to launch him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Owens getting two off the backsplash but walking into Orton’s backbreaker to even things up.

It’s Owens staying in control though and slugging away in the corner, setting up the Cannonball but Orton rolls away. The powerslam plants Owens and the t-bone suplex does the same (Orton must have been watching the Divas tag). They fight to the floor again and it’s a Brogue Kick to Orton for the DQ at 11:06.

Rating: C. I wasn’t really feeling this one but at least Owens looked like someone who could go toe to toe with a guy on Orton’s level. I don’t think he’s going to be back to the level he reached when he debuted for a good while, but there’s a big difference between being forgotten/buried and what we’re seeing here.

Post match Sheamus goes after Orton but Cesaro runs in to get his hands on Owens. Sheamus offers a distraction though and Owens powerbombs Cesaro and spits on him.

Cena says he’s been defending this title for months now but tonight he’s up against the golden boy and the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. If Rollins is as good as he says he is, then he can shock the world.

US Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Cena is defending and for the sake of simplicity, I’ll only refer to Cena as the champion. A quick shoulder puts Rollins on the floor and things slow right back down. Back in and an AA attempt is countered, allowing Rollins to kick him down to take over. Rollins slaps on a chinlock and we take a break. Back with Cena fighting out of the chinlock (dang that must have been a dull commercial break) but missing a charge in the corner.

Cena comes back and tries his finishing sequence, only to have Rollins kick him in the head/shoulder for two. The Shuffle is broken up by another kick to the head but Cena avoids a corner dive of his own, setting up a tornado DDT for two on Seth. The top rope knee to the head gets two on the champ but Cena catches him in an electric chair for two. Another knee to the nose puts Cena in the corner but we stop to check for blood (which is flowing from his nose. It could be broken).

Thankfully Cena will have none of that but Rollins kicks him in the head, setting up the buckle bomb for two. The doctor comes in to look at the nose but Cena is right back up with the springboard Stunner. Rollins flips out of the AA though and the low superkick gets a very close two. Fans: “THIS IS AWESOME.” Not really guys.

An AA gets two (that should be a drinking game) and Cena gets his nose looked at again. A closeup shows that the nose is definitely broken as it’s off to one side. Cena gets superplexed off the top and Rollins floats over into a falcon’s arrow for two. The fans are getting way into these kickouts. Rollins misses the Phoenix Splash and it’s off to the STF for the tap at 17:05.

Rating: B. Well there’s the Summerslam co-main event. I’m guessing they’ll go with Rollins saying he had nothing to lose which is about as acceptable as you can get but I’m never a fan of these endings. Cena vs. Rollins for the World Title at Summerslam is fine as there isn’t really anyone else to go for the belt, but I’m hoping Cena drops the US Title before the show. Good but not great main event here.

Overall Rating: C+. I’m kind of split on this one. The wrestling isn’t bad and the show flew by, but there’s really nothing worth talking about. This really was a show that didn’t do anything bad (Big Show beating Ambrose aside) and started setting up stuff for Summerslam. We’ve already got Brock vs. Taker set so you really don’t need to focus on it all that much. It’s a pretty middle of the road show but it went by quickly and got some things done so we’ll say it’s a good week.

Results

Big Show b. Dean Ambrose via countout

Neville b. Fandango – Red Arrow

Sasha Banks b. Paige – Bank Statement

Lucha Dragons b. Los Matadores – Hurricanrana to Diego

Becky Lynch/Charlotte b. Nikki Bella/Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her to Fox

Randy Orton b. Kevin Owens via DQ when Sheamus interfered

John Cena b. Seth Rollins – STF

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 20, 2015
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

As uneventful as Battleground seemed going into last night, a lot changed in the final moments. The Undertaker of all people returned to end the World Title match by attacking Brock Lesnar. The interesting point was that Rollins just disappeared after basically being squashed by Lesnar for the entire match. It should be interesting to see what happens as we head towards Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at the end of the main event.

Here’s Undertaker to open things up with the announcers listing off all of his accomplishments and making the entire moment fee like anything else. The fans don’t seem to mind Undertaker’s rather heelish actions last night, as anyone with a functioning brain could have predicted. Undertaker starts with a big line: streaks are made to be broken.

However, Lesnar has gone on for months about his greatest accomplishment. Ever since he broke the Streak, Lesnar has bragged about it. You can’t kill what won’t die, and Undertaker will conquer what has yet to be conquered. Just like everyone else, be they man or beast, Brock Lesnar will rest in peace. This definitely wasn’t a heel promo and it didn’t need to be.

Since we haven’t talked about them enough yet, we cut to the Authority who brags about how big a main event they have. Stephanie is ready to market things, but HHH thinks Brock should take the night off.

Cena/Orton/Cesaro vs. Rusev/Owens/Sheamus for the main event. Cesaro and Rusev getting those spots is a great sign.

Charlotte vs. Brie Bella

Team Bad is on commentary but before the match we have to get a quick recap of how Stephanie saved us all. Feeling out process to start with Charlotte knocking Brie to the floor but misses a dive. Back from a break with Brie working on the arm and kicking Charlotte square in the jaw. We get the YES Kicks to fire up the crowd, followed by a low dropkick for two. Brie hooks a chinlock for a good while before Charlotte starts firing off chops and a big boot to the face. Nikki’s distraction doesn’t work and a spear sets up the Figure Eight for the submission for Charlotte at 9:02.

Rating: C. Brie is fine if you keep things simple but Charlotte winning is definitely the right idea. It’s starting to feel like the new girls are becoming a thing and that’s a very good sign this early in their run. It’s going to get annoying just sitting around waiting on the title match though, which seems to be what we’re going to be doing until Nikki breaks the record.

HHH is on the phone with Heyman and tells Lesnar to take the night off. Heyman needs to grow a set and tell Lesnar to not show up tonight. Miz tries to interrupt and gets Big Show as a result.

Prime Time Players vs. Los Matadores

Non-title. Darren takes Diego into the corner to start and blasts him with a spinning forearm. The masked men take over, despite the fans not sounding all that interested. Young snaps off a belly to belly suplex and it’s off to Titus to clean house. Cue New Day for a distraction though, allowing Diego to hit a Backstabber on Titus for the pin at 4:04.

Rating: D. So not only is the feud continuing, but now we’re getting the old distraction into a pin finish again? Also, can we please stop giving people wins over champions when it’s not going to lead anywhere? This happened a few years back when Kofi pinned WWE Champion Randy Orton and then it went nowhere. If that’s what you’re going for, just have the champs win and then let it be a post match attack. Finally, if you want to build a team up, STOP HAVING THEM LOSE TO A NOTHING TEAM LIKE LOS MATADORES! That’s not how you build up a match, especially when they’re not even in the feud.

Big Show vs. Miz

Show chops Miz in the corner to start, as only Big Show can do. A slam sets up the middle rope elbow for the pin on Miz at 1:27. And he was supposed to get a title shot last night?

Show rants about how he’s still around and tells Ryback to show up on Tough Enough tomorrow night for a brawl.

HHH and Stephanie want artwork made up for Lesnar vs. Undertaker when Heyman arrives. He’s here to give Lesnar’s response and nothing more, but the Authority isn’t interested.

Back from a break with the roster meeting with the Authority. They want the entire locker room to keep Lesnar and Undertaker apart because they have to protect the Summerslam main event. There is WAY too much Authority tonight.

Here’s Heyman to address the Summerslam main event. Brock isn’t the World Champion right now, but why isn’t he? It’s not because Rollins out wrestled or out fought him or because Rollins survived a trip to Suplex City. It was all because of a yet again resurrected Undertaker, who can’t get over losing the Streak to Brock Lesnar. Of course Heyman has hyped up the Streak being broken because why wouldn’t he?

It’s the biggest accomplishment of his career because no one else could ever do it. The Undertaker wants to face Brock Lesnar again at Summerslam, so let’s make this personal. Heyman goes into full on promoter voice to rant about the Streak being broken. Undertaker may have sold his soul to the devil to get revenge but he belongs to Brock Lesnar. There goes the gong and the look on Heyman’s face is priceless.

Brock hits the ring and the fight is on with the fans being behind a ticked off Brock. Security has as much success as you would expect so HHH sends a bunch of midcarders out until there must be twenty five guys trying to break this up. The announcers bail so it’s up to the audience to tell us how awesome this is (and they’re right for a change). Undertaker gets to him on the floor again as even main eventers are out there to break it up now.

We come back from a break and they’re fighting in the back again with the entire roster not being able to hold them back. Brock finally steps back and says he’s done, allowing the police to tie his hands.

Rollins comes in to laugh at what just happened but promises the Authority that he’ll be in the arena later.

Bray Wyatt says he’s never alone because his family stands by his side. They know that he is the revolution and the fans need to learn it. The people have annointed Roman Reigns and it’s time for them to burn for it. Harper says this is just the beginning and they will take Reigns apart brick by brick. Anyone but you.

Luke Harper vs. Roman Reigns

The fans sound like they’re chanting for Wyatt so Byron says it’s for Reigns. Roman shrugs off a clothesline and fires off chops, only to have Harper go after Roman’s left arm. That earns him a suplex though and we take a quick break. Back with Roman stuck in a chinlock before Harper wisely goes back to the arm. A charge doesn’t work for Reigns as Harper tosses him outside, injuring the arm again.

The match keeps going as Harper cranks on the arm while also working on a chinlock. That’s dedication to your craft. Harper misses a big boot and crashes to the floor, allowing Reigns to start his comeback. Roman and Bray get into it with both Wyatts taking apron kicks. Wyatt pulls Reigns outside though and that’s a DQ at 13:00.

Rating: C-. Harper trying some psychology was a good idea but it’s pretty clear that we’re headed for a tag match at Summerslam. I like the idea of Ambrose and Reigns as the best friends/brothers who will fight back to back until the end and anything with Wyatts vs. Shield vibes is a good thing.

Everyone brawls post match and the Wyatts run.

We get the same recap from the opening.

Here’s Rollins to brag about surviving with the title. He’s sorry to announce this to the people but Lesnar didn’t get the job done. Being champion is so much harder than people think it is because Rollins has to put so much effort into it. After last night, he’s still exactly where he promised he would be, but he never got to hear his name announced last night. Therefore, Lillian Garcia is invited in for the official announcement.

That’s exactly what we get….and here’s Cena to interrupt. Rollins cuts him off by saying this isn’t about him because no one cares about what he does, but Cena talks about how a champion is supposed to be ready to fight no matter what. The brawl is about to be on but, as you would expect, Rollins bails. That might be the co-main event at Summerslam.

Hey! Remember when Stephanie TOTALLY saved the Divas’ division? Well here it is again.

Paige/Becky Lynch vs. Naomi/Sasha Banks

The Bellas/Alicia are on commentary this time. Sasha and Becky get things going, which is almost guaranteed to be awesome. Some armdrags and an armbar have Sasha in early trouble so it’s off to Naomi. That’s fine with Becky who drops a leg (where’s Xavier Woods to rate it though?) as the heroes stay in control.

Sasha gets kicked in the head a few times and we take a break. Back with Naomi cranking on a front facelock as JBL brings up WCW and the NWO because it’s just so fun to make fun eighteen years later. Back from a break with Naomi kicking Becky in the face for two. Sasha comes back in to yell at Paige, allowing Naomi to get in some shots from the apron.

Becky rolls away and DIVES for a tag but Sasha makes a save, only to have the hot tag bring in Paige a second later. Paige cleans house but the PTO on Maomi is broken up at the last second. Everything breaks down as the Bellas just keep chattering like they do in everything they say. The Bank Statement makes Paige tag at 13:05.

Rating: C+. Less Bella means a better match. It’s so adorable hearing them talk about themselves like that and imagining that people care for them. I’m sure they’ll still be around because that’s the nature of the beast, but at least there’s some fresh blood to change things up around here.

Southpaw preview, which is tied into a Tough Enough plug.

Long Undertaker vs. Lesnar recap.

We look back at Rusev’s ankle being fine and the ensuing Ziggler beatdown.

Lana says Ziggler will be fine when Summer Rae comes up in a Lana outfit. Rusev comes in to kiss Summer, who then slaps Lana in the face.

Randy Orton/John Cena/Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens/Rusev/Sheamus

After the entrances take their sweet time, we start things off with Cena vs. Owens. Why? The feud (should have at least) ended last night and it’s off to Rusev before any contact. An early fall away slam gets two and Rusev opts for the stomping away in the corner. That goes badly for the Russian so it’s back to Owens, who has to dive to the ropes to break up an STF attempt. A DDT plants Cena but he rolls away from the Cannonball for the hot tag.

Everything breaks down and Cesaro loads up the Swing, only to eat a jumping superkick to send the match to a break. Back with Owens holding Cesaro down until Cesaro powers up with a nice suplex. Cesaro gets to play face in peril for a bit as all the heels get in their shots. Sheamus and Owens wind up hitting each other though and the fight is on with Sheamus getting the worse of it.

Sheamus walks out on the match and Owens does the same a few moments later, leaving Rusev down 3-1. This goes about as you would expect it to with the parade of finishers putting Rusev down. Cue Lana to spear Summer down, leaving Cesaro to catapult Rusev into an RKO for the pin at 14:21.

Rating: C. Totally Smackdown six man until the cool ending move. I’m not sure what the point of this was as it just came and went without having much going on, but at least Rusev doesn’t look bad in defeat and the other two looked fine as well. This was such a strange ending to Raw as everything was wrapped up and none of these guys seem to have a match set for Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C+. This is about as much of a two idea show as you can have as they set up the main event of Summerslam and pushed the heck out of the Divas revolution. How amazing is it that the Divas could arguably be the more interesting story of the two? You can see that they’ve turned it on for Summerslam and that’s one of the best things you can get in WWE.

Results

Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Figure Eight

Los Matadores b. Prime Time Players – Backstabber to O’Neil

Big Show b. Miz – Middle rope elbow

Roman Reigns b. Luke Harper via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered

Sasha Banks/Naomi b. Paige/Becky Lynch – Bank Statement to Paige

John Cena/Randy Orton/Cesaro b. Rusev/Kevin Owens/Sheamus – RKO to Rusev

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 13, 2015
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Battleground and thankfully Brock is here, hopefully to beat up a pair of cars in a handicap match this week. Other than that we have the rest of the build towards Wyatt vs. Reigns, possibly even including why they’re fighting and what it has to do with Reigns’ daughter, and more stuff including whatever Ambrose might be doing on Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s Lesnar beatdown, complete with Heyman reusing the Dudleys’ commandment of don’t screw with Brock. It’s fair to erase the Dudleys from history at this point so it’s not that big a deal. Heyman might have written that line in the first place.

Here are Brock and Heyman to get things going, drawing a SUPLEX CITY chant. For some reason the crushed car is brought out as Heyman proclaims Brock’s impending dominance over Rollins this coming Sunday. Paul lists off Brock’s accomplishments and the various people he’s conquered before promising to have Lesnar suplex Rollins all over the place, put his foot on Seth’s chest and be proclaimed the champion once again.

Cue Rollins and Kane because YAY KANE IS BACK FROM HAWAII OR WHATEVER THAT STUPID STORY WAS! Rollins talks about how Brock is frustrated over his inability to be champion and stumbles over trying to say “an inanimate object” in a funny goof. Brock has been carrying the car around the country (in a truck or on his back?) like a symbol and that’s just fine, because Suplex City is burned to the ground tonight.

Brock offers to take Rollins to Suplex City tonight but Kane intervenes with the threat of a contract signing. Kane threatens Lesnar if he messes up the contract signing but Heyman laughs off the threats from “Undertaker’s baby brother.” Kane is of course annoyed as Heyman goes on about Brock smashing stuff with one final promise of pain to Rollins if he provokes the Beast tonight.

Ryback/Randy Orton vs. Sheamus/Big Show

Miz is on commentary and this is billed as an All-Star match. I’d prefer we go play that over the top video game instead but have it your way. This is the old standard idea of taking two feuds and combining them into a tag match, which is an idea that stays around because it still works. Ryback knocks Sheamus to the floor to start and we’re in a very early break.

Back with Sheamus bailing into the floor to hide from Orton. Apparently Randy is really bad at hide and seek so it’s back to Ryback vs. Big Show with the latter stomping Ryback down onto the mat to take over. Sheamus tries a bearhug and is easily driven into the corner for the tag to Orton. Remember the days when Sheamus was like, really really strong? What happened to that?

Back from a second break with an Irish Curse (backbreaker. OH THE SCANDAL!) for two on Orton but he counters Big Show’s chokeslam into a DDT for a breather. Miz gets off of commentary and shouts on a mic as Ryback comes in and cleans house. Big Show has enough of Miz though and chases him up the ramp, leaving Sheamus to take an RKO and top rope splash from Ryback for the pin at 15:21.

Rating: C+. Nice long tag match here and again, a good way to set up both matches at once. I would have liked a countout or DQ finish instead of having Sheamus take a pin, but it’s a plus that he took two finishers for a pin so it’s hardly clean. Sheamus vs. Orton does nothing for me and the triple threat isn’t much better, but at least there’s something on the line and Ryback has started looking good again.

Network ad.

Rollins doesn’t like the idea of the contract signing but Kane has a plan.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

Good grief people build a midcard already. Wyatt’s name graphic is just letters on a screen now instead of in a box like everyone else. During the entrance though, Reigns appears and lays out Wyatt as Ambrose is just kind of forgotten. Bray finally gets in a lantern shot to escape. No match.

The Bellas have been nominated for Choice Female Athletes in the Teen Choice Awards. Dear goodness I don’t want to know who else they are.

Here are the Bellas and Alicia Fox with something to say. Nikki brags about holding the title forever because AJ Lee MUST be eliminated from history. She’s defended against every single Diva there is and has given them all a chance. A quick search shows that, at least in TV matches, Nikki has defended against AJ, Naomi and Tamina (whose one shot came at Beast in the East) and that’s it. She calls the three of them Team Bella, because all you have to do these days is put the word Team in front of a name. Come up with something more interesting, please.

Nikki goes on about how awesome she is and how dominant they are….and here’s Stephanie McMahon because she hasn’t laid waste to the Divas yet. Stephanie is a face tonight too because there’s something cool coming and therefore she just MUST be there to get a piece of the action. The legacy of the WWE rests on her shoulders (yes, Stephanie says this company’s history is on HER shoulders) and there’s a revolution going on right now in women’s sports, ranging from women’s soccer to UFC to tennis. These are supposed to be applause lines if that’s not clear.

Stephanie introduces Paige, because of ALL DIVAS IN WWE, Paige is the one that would be thrilled to be associated with Stephanie. I mean Paige is clearly a corporate loyalist right? Nikki talks about how Paige doesn’t deserve another shot, but STEPHANIE runs WWE and this division instead of her.

Stephanie, the WWE and Paige want this revolution (what is she even talking about?) but courage can’t do it alone. Therefore, Paige needs backup. Instead of bringing this person out though, Stephanie goes on about how amazing they are and FINALLY introduces Becky Lynch. Now, does Becky get to say anything and introduce herself? Of course not, because that would cut away from Stephanie’s mic time, meaning the boss gets to introduce Charlotte, in that voice that only Stephanie can deliver.

Cole: “STEPHANIE HAS SHAKEN THINGS UP!” I hate this company at times. Stephanie: “WOO!” Oh shut up. Cue Naomi and Tamina with a mic because we haven’t heard enough horrible voices yet. Naomi says the two of them are all the competition the Bellas need. That’s all the mic time she needs too, because Stephanie needs to bring out Sasha Banks. Sasha stands with Naomi and Tamina, but STEPHANIE WON’T SHUT HER FREAKING MOUTH and talks about setting the table for opportunity.

We get a THIS IS AWESOME chant to a legitimately cool moment and the fight is on. Charlotte cleans house until Naomi dropkicks her down, only to have Paige and Sasha get into it. Tamina breaks up the PTO on Naomi but Brie Bella interrupts as the announcers line up to kiss Stephanie’s feet for these new arrivals. Alicia gets caught in the Figure Eight, Becky puts Brie in the armbar and Nikki gets the Bank Statement as a big NXT chant breaks out. The Bellas and Fox are cleared out and the other six yell at each other as the freaking Total Divas theme plays this out.

I’m not going to bother ranting about how Stephanie made this all about her. It’s Stephanie McMahon, she’s the biggest hound for a spotlight that has ever lived in WWE and you know that if there’s a big moment there that people are going to erupt over, she’s going to shoehorn her way in despite the fact that there is absolutely no logical reason for her to be involved.

This story has been about Paige finding help but that’s thrown out the window because Stephanie has basically just decided to turn this story into a chess game for her own amusement. The big sign here: none of them got to talk and then Stephanie just left after she was the only voice you heard for the big moment. The main part here was all about Stephanie look cool and how thankful we should be for her big gift to us and that’s all there is to it.

Aside from all that, this is EXACTLY what the Divas have been needing for so long. All of a sudden, there is some brand new blood in the Divas’ division and the fans buy into it. They know these three are amazingly talented and can tear the house down…..but the Bellas are still around. As long as they’re the focus of the division (and they will be as long as Total Divas is around), the newcomers are going to have to tone it WAY down so Nikki, Brie and Alicia can handle it and that takes away from the NXT crew’s magic. This is going to be interesting, but they could drag things way down for the sake of breaking AJ’s record.

New Day vs. Prime Time Players/Mark Henry

The hometown boy Xavier Woods says this is the greatest town in the world because they stay positive. Even though they shut down the city due to an inch of snow last year and the Atlanta Hawks choked in the NBA Playoffs, they stayed positive. Kofi is 100% that they’re getting the titles back on Sunday because Prime Time is out of time at Battleground because NEW DAY ROCKS.

Titus shrugs off a Kofi kick to start so it’s off to Darren, who clotheslines E. out to the floor. The Players and Henry throw everyone out to the floor (JBL: “FLYING PH.D!”) as we take an early break. Back with Titus taking the rotating stomps in the corner as the announcers talk about how awesome the Divas were. For once, they’re actually right. E. gets two off a splash but Titus is quickly up and tagging in Henry to clean house. Everything breaks down and a World’s Strongest Slam ends Woods at 8:29.

Rating: D+. Good night do they really not know how to set up a tag match anymore? When is the last time New Day won a match? My guess is they get the belts back anyway because that’s how WWE works these days. The match was nothing interesting and Henry is just thrown out there but gets the pin over a #1 contender anyway. Well sure why not.

The winners dance.

Long recap of Lesnar b. Cadillac via TKO last week.

King Barrett vs. R-Truth

No King entrance for Truth and Cole tells us he rapped to the ring during the commercial. Truth gyrates a lot to start and gets kicked in his face. A backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two each on Truth and a boot knocks him onto the apron. Truth fights out of a chinlock as the announcers talk about Tough Enough to kill time. Barrett misses a charge and eats a Lie Detector for the pin at 3:12.

Rating: D-. Good grief it’s going to get a rubber match on Sunday isn’t it? This whole thing is such a waste of whatever they had with the King of the Ring because Barrett hasn’t been embarrassed enough over the years. Bad match, horrible feud, disgusting waste of someone like Barrett for a comedy act.

Truth puts on his king attire.

We recap Rusev destroying Ziggler last week, finally making Rusev feel like a monster (and a wrestler) again.

It’s Open Challenge time and Rusev is here to renew a rivalry that doesn’t need to be renewed. He blames Lana for losing the title in the first place and says he broke Ziggler because of the USA. Before the match though, here’s Kevin Owens with something to say. Rusev says no because he was here first and that Owens needs to pick a single first name. They argue a bit but here’s Cesaro to interrupt as well. Cena heads outside as the three brawl, setting up a triple threat match with the winner getting a title shot immediately after because WHO NEEDS PSYCHOLOGY???

Rusev vs. Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens

Cena is on commentary as Cesaro gets beaten down in the corner. Rusev gets beaten down and Cannonballed, only to have Cesaro hit the running uppercut to Owens’ jaw. Swiss Death gets two on Rusev as Cena puts over the Divas’ segment. Owens has to escape two pinfall attempts, followed by Cesaro doing the same off a Saito Suplex from Rusev. Cena continues to be as good of a commentator as you’ll see in this company, only to have to stop for Cesaro turning Owens’ superplex into a Tower of Doom for two each.

The Russian takes over again as these guys are just hammering each other. Owens blocks Rusev’s German suplex attempt so Cesaro Germans both of them AT ONCE. I know I say this every week but DANG that guy is strong. Since that’s not enough, Cesaro busts out a corkscrew dive over the top to take out both guys. Back in and Cesaro gets two off a high cross body on Rusev but Owens breaks up the Swing with a superkick.

Kevin drops both guys but stops to shout at Cena, allowing Rusev’s Alabama Slam to set up the Accolade. Cesaro saves this time and delays a vertical suplex on the Russian. Well ex-Russian but whatever. Cena keeps making some rather heelish yet totally fair comments about how he’s the lucky one here as these guys are all brawling but he gets to come in fresh. Rusev sends Kevin outside and Owens bails, saying he’ll see Cena Sunday.

Back from a break with Rusev chinlocking Cesaro, only to have the bald one pop up and hit a springboard spinning uppercut to drop Rusev. The apron superplex is countered with Rusev suplexing Cesaro onto the apron to put both guys down onto the floor. Back in again and Cesaro dropkicks Rusev on the top, only to have his superplex countered. The Russian’s top rope splash misses and Cesaro crossfaces Rusev, only to have Rusev power up into something like a spinning Rock Bottom for two more.

Back up again and Cesaro can’t get a Sharpshooter, allowing Rusev to hit a spinwheel kick for two. The Accolade is countered into the Swing which sets up the Sharpshooter, drawing a lout TAP chant. Rusev makes the rope but since this is still officially a triple threat, he has to crawl outside to break the hold. Nice touch of continuity there. Cesaro hasn’t done something cool in all of 14 seconds now so he comes back with a suicide dive. Back in and Cesaro gets tripped off the top, setting up a superkick from Rusev for the pin at 24:02.

Rating: B+. Why not make Cesaro the Intercontinental Champion? Like, just let him go out there and have awesome matches with anyone because Cesaro is pure gold at this point. It’s the simple concept of “hey, this guy is awesome right now so LET’S PUSH HIM!” Unfortunately he’ll probably be forgotten again in three weeks while someone like Barrett or Truth get pushed because they’re funny or something. Like, is Cesaro even going to be on the pay per view?

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

The psychology is all over the place here as Cena, the face champion, comes in with a huge advantage since Rusev is spent. Cena starts fast and hits a release fisherman’s suplex followed by a headlock. Rusev bails to the ropes but Cena nails the shoulders. In a nice touch, Rusev can’t get up due to the exhaustion, making the finishing sequence look really awkward. The AA is countered into the Accolade out of nowhere and Cena hangs on for about 45 seconds (fair since Rusev is weakened) until Owens comes back in for the DQ at 4:57.

Rating: D. This was more awkward and weird than bad as Cena was basically wrestling a squash match against a big name until the end where he got caught in a big move. Like I said, this was just strange and would have been FAR better served as a single, four way elimination with Cena involved. It was different, but the execution of the second match didn’t work for me.

Owens gives Rusev a Pop-Up Powerbomb and tells Cena that he’s taking the title on Sunday.

Rollins tells Kane that it’s on him if tonight goes bad.

The Tough Enough cast is on stage when Lita (a coach on the show) comes out with something to say. She officially introduces us to the cast and this is a big waste of time because Tough Enough just isn’t all that interesting this season. It was so uninteresting that I haven’t watched it yet and don’t plan to.

We recap Reigns and Wyatt from earlier.

Stardust (hey he’s back) talks about how the world needs heroes because the world is made up of heroes and villains. “From where I stand, the view never changes.” Neville has been claiming that the forces of evil have forsaken him, but those forces will bring him down. Embrace the strange. Or embrace Cody Rhodes for a change.

Barrett vs. Truth for the crown on Sunday. If Rusev and/or Cesaro aren’t on that show, I lose so much of my faith in this company, meaning I fully expect it to happen.

Stardust vs. Neville

Neville is no longer the New Sensation, which is one of the best things that could happen to him. A loud CODY chant starts up but let’s just keep him as Stardust because it’s done wonders for his career. Stardust isn’t interested in a handshake and kicks Neville down, only to have to get up before the Red Arrow can launch. There’s a cartwheel from Star and we hit the chinlock.

As has been the trend tonight, this match is bizarre as the fans are cheering Stardust instead of the guy they’re pushing as an actual superhero. It’s funny how such shortsightedness works. Neville fights back to silence (I’m stunned too) but Stardust rolls him up and grabs the trunks for the pin at 4:09. JBL: “Go to the pay window young man!”

Rating: D. So let’s see. They’ve (so far) wasted any potential for Cody coming off his father’s passing, Neville looks lame because no one wants to boo the son of a legend whose father recently passed away, and then Stardust cheats instead of getting to make this an important and cool moment. Oh and the match wasn’t any good either. What a mess as psychology means nothing around here.

It’s time for the contract signing to close things up this week. Rollins and Kane are out first and the champ talks about watching the footage of the car being destroyed again. After this Sunday, Suplex City will be a memory and he’ll still be champion, but here’s a Beast to disagree. Well, likely to stand there while Heyman disagrees. Paul says Rollins wants to burn Suplex City down, but the fans want to see him get taken apart for his breaking of the eleventh commandment.

People want to see Rollins get beaten up and that’s what they’re going to see this Sunday when he gets kicked, slapped, punched, suplexed, F5’d and dethroned. Rollins signs anyway, as does Brock, and there goes the table. Kane comes at Brock but Lesnar pulls out an ax handle and actually flips the table back up. The fight is on again and Rollins goes flying. Kane breaks up an F5 on the floor and Rollins hits him with the ax handle.

Some steps to the head have Brock in more trouble but Beast Mode prevails with Kane taking an F5 on the floor. There goes Rollins into the crowd, leaving Brock to crush Kane’s ankle on the steps, likely making this Sunday one on one. Brock poses with the title but we’re not done yet as Rollins comes back to ringside and yells about being the man to slay the Beast on Sunday. Medics tend to Kane so Rollins yells at him too, calling Kane’s career one big disappointment. This is on Kane and Rollins kicks him in the ankle to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a great example of a show where the good was good but the bad was really bad. Some of these matches and stories are disasters and I really don’t think I need to explain which is which. The show wasn’t terrible and had some VERY good stuff going on, but between Stephanie throwing herself into a feud she has nothing to do with and the battle of the kings that no one wants to see and a few other big misses, I wanted this show to end instead of wanting to like it. Not the worst by any means and the Divas segment (once it was about them) was great, but WAY too much bad to hold it back.

Results

Ryback/Randy Orton b. Sheamus/Big Show – Top rope splash to Sheamus

Mark Henry/Prime Time Players b. New Day – World’s Strongest Slam to Woods

R-Truth b. King Barrett – Lie Detector

Rusev b. Kevin Owens and Cesaro – Superkick to Cesaro

Rusev b. John Cena via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered

Stardust b. Neville – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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After all the pay per views in the span of a few weeks, this show marks the beginning of a recently unthinkable FIVE WEEK build to Battleground. The big stories are Sheamus now holding the Money in the Bank briefcase and fellow heel Seth Rollins retaining the World Title last night in a long ladder match against Dean Ambrose. This means that Rollins won a major match on his own. I wonder if we’ll hear about that tonight. Let’s get to it.

Before we get started, there was one last tribute to Dusty Rhodes. Yeah it’s the same one, but Dusty deserves as many as WWE wants to give him.

The main story throughout the night was the Authority picking the next challenger to Seth’s title. This means that people were trying to impress them all night, because the Authority are the king and queen of WWE and the wrestlers are all just their playthings, sent out there to dance and perform at the Authority’s will. Throughout the night there were people having regular matches which for some reason meant more, even though it’s almost never someone you see earlier in the night because WWE has gotten very, very stale in its format. We’ll get to the next challenger at the end.

Rollins came out for his big victory speech and bragged about being that much better than Ambrose. They’re doing a great job of keeping Ambrose from beating Rollins and when he finally does, which he will one day, it’s going to be a big moment. As Rollins took all the credit (literally thanking himself over and over in a great heel touch), Ambrose came out and cleaned house, saying he wasn’t leaving the ring until he got another fight against Rollins. This went on for awhile until Sheamus came out for a fight, eventually losing to a rollup. Why would you ever want to win something in WWE? It almost guarantees a losing streak.

Case in point: R-Truth beat King Barrett for the second time in two days, this time in about twenty seconds. Barrett beat him down post match and talked about how serious this was to him. I’m picturing Barrett running around talking about how TOTALLY IMPORTANT it is that he’s a king while everyone else laughs at him, because that’s how interesting wrestlers are treated around here.

Kevin Owens bragged, Dolph Ziggler challenged him to a non-title match, Owens beat Ziggler in the same match Ziggler has had for the last year. In case you can’t tell, I really, really do not care about Dolph Ziggler. Word on the street is that he was about to leave the company and I can’t say I’m complaining.

Paige tried to get the Divas to help her fight the Bellas but this somehow tied into the Authority and the rest of the division not wanting to get on their bad side. This is pretty clearly setting up some NXT callups and I’m terrified of what might happen to them. The Bellas beat Paige in a handicap match later in the show.

Sheamus helped Kane beat Orton in a nothing match. This was supposed to make me think Kane is a viable contender to Rollins. That’s hilarious, if not a bit stupid.

With an unintentional assist from Ryback, Miz beat Big Show via countout. This was fine as a quick help to the three way feud.

Roman Reigns wanted to fight Bray Wyatt, but Bray did his usual freaky promo before holding up a picture of Reigns playing with his daughter. See, that’s at least that’s a specific thing for Wyatt, who usually only speaks in riddles. It’s a baby step, but at least a step.

Machine Gun Kelly, a rapper I’ve only heard of through WWE, rapped for the better part of eternity and was then beaten up by Kevin Owens. That alone made the way too long performance worth it as Owens is one of the coolest heels in a very, very long time.

Neville/Prime Time Players beat the New Day in a fun six man. It’s good to see Neville added into a feud so he has something to do instead of just floating from match to match.

The big reveal was, of course, Brock Lesnar, which opens up a ton of storyline plotholes but his Suplex City/Exit F5 shirt more than made up for it. A few of these plot holes:

1. Cole’s lawsuit, which isn’t so much a plot hole as they addressed it on WWE.com, but they really need to mention it on Raw. It just needs to be a quick line of “we settled it out of court” but it needs to be said on TV.

2. After Stephanie freaked out of Lesnar and sent him away because she hadn’t captured a good set of balls in a long time, they’re just bringing him back to beat up their guy? Is this supposed to be a test? Or are they dumping Rollins to go with Lesnar, who was all insane and violent and nowhere near as controllable as Rollins?

3. What if Rollins wins? Is he supposed to just say “yeah it’s cool Authority. I don’t mind you throwing the biggest, baddest monster ever. What are we doing for dinner tonight?”

Overall this show was about setting up Battleground, which again has the potential to be one of the more entertaining shows in a long time. Granted a lot of that is due to Brock, but that’s why you bring him in. I wasn’t wild on the story of wondering who the opponent was going to be because Lesnar really wasn’t all that shocking. Still though, good enough show which wasn’t the same old repetitive stuff we’ve seen time after time. There are some plot holes that have to be addressed however, but you can do that in just a few quick promos.

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Money in the Bank was always going to be a different kind of show as they had to fly through the build do to the lack of time. However, it was also helpful as we didn’t have to sit through a month of people just fighting each other for no reason other than they would be in a contest determined by completely different means of winning. Let’s get to it.

We’ll get the biggest deal out of the way first: this show took place just a few days after the passing of the American Dream Dusty Rhodes. The show opened with a touching tribute as the roster came on stage to have the bell rung ten times, followed by Dusty’s famous theme music being played one last time. This is one of the few wrestling deaths that actually got to me, which is surprising as I never cared much for Rhodes over the years. However, it’s always good to see WWE give their heroes the kind of treatment they deserve.

However, there’s also some really stupid stuff to get through, starting with the pre-show match. R-Truth beat King Barrett because that’s what almost everyone does to Barrett. In theory this leads to Truth as the self professed King and Barrett running around saying “NO! I’M THE REAL KING!”, because he hasn’t been embarrassed enough yet. I’m not sure when we reach that point, but I’m scared to think of how bad it could get for him.

They started the regular matches off fast with the Money in the Bank ladder match, consisting of Sheamus, Randy Orton, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Roman Reigns, Neville and Kane. Sheamus won in what was actually a pretty big surprise, meaning it was time for people to criticize it. However, let’s take a quick look at why Sheamus was at worst the second best option to win.

Neville – Not ready

Kane – Will you be serious?

Kofi Kingston – The longest of long shots but never a real contender

Dolph Ziggler – Dead in the water for months if not years now and potentially leaving in the near future. This would have been the weakest choice imaginable as Ziggler isn’t a main event guy anymore.

That leaves us with three options.

Randy Orton is always a possibility, but we’ve seen Orton vs. Rollins how many times now? He would have been a good fall back option, but it feels like something we’ve seen so many times now that there’s nothing to rehash.

Roman Reigns was definitely the heavy favorite but let’s imagine the reaction if he wins. “Man, WWE never mixes things up anymore.” “Reigns wins, just like everyone knew he would.” “Can we get a surprise for once?” Well that’s what we got, as Bray Wyatt remembered he had a reason to be mad at Reigns and interfered to cost him the match.

That leaves Sheamus, nearly through process of elimination. He may not be the most exciting option, but at least he’s a former World Champion and has been doing well enough in the new heel role. If this leads to him taking over the Authority enforcer role from Big Show/Kane, it’s certainly a plus. If Sheamus wins he’ll be little more than a transitional champion, but he gets a recharge out of it. I see little problem here, but I’m sure I’ll be told why he’s so boring and all that, meaning I’ll point out why doing the obvious Reigns win wouldn’t have been much more interesting.

The match itself was the expected good Money in the Bank match, but as usual there were too many people in there. It lead to a bunch of sitting around for people, with Ziggler especially taking long rests outside on the floor instead of going for the briefcase. I could go for taking this down to five people or so and letting there be some drama instead of just piling the same spots we see every time. It’s still entertaining though.

Nikki Bella beat Paige to retain the title with that big forearm after the referee caught the Bellas cheating because that’s how the match was scheduled to end instead of having the ending that actually follows the rules of wrestling. The match was actually good stuff as they had the longest title match since 2006 and the match worked accordingly. That’s a telling sign going forward, but that being said, how many Divas would be able to survive a five minute match, let alone over eleven? Nikki is getting better but this Bellas storyline is long past its expiration date.

Ryback and Big Show did an average power match until Miz ran in to make it a three way feud, which is clearly what they’ve wanted to do the entire time. Why they didn’t just MAKE IT THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE is anyone’s guess, but I’d assume it has something to do with wanting to stretch feuds out for the sake of stretching them out because they think just waiting means building a story.

Cena vs. Owens II was outstanding, just as you would expect it to be. I liked it better than the first match but I won’t put up much of an argument if you liked the first one better. The key here though was Owens’ post match attack on Cena, as he continues to be the best heel in the company by just being a jerk that thinks he’s better than everyone else. Yeah he’ll run when it’s not his time, but when the bell rings, he’ll go toe to toe with anyone.

That’s what makes all the chicken heels annoying: it’s clear WWE knows how to book another style but they just don’t. Owens could be in the title picture tomorrow if they wanted him to be, but I’m sure it’s time for a gimmick match with Cena because that’s what they do.

The Prime Time Players took the Tag Team Titles from the New Day in a surprising upset. However, the more you think about it, the more you think about it, the more it makes sense. This was the first time New Day was in a standard tag match (due to Kofi’s injuries in the ladder match) and they lost the belts. It makes sense, which is why it’s so surprising that WWE actually went with it.

The main event saw WWE World Champion Seth Rollins beat Dean Ambrose in a very, very long ladder match. This was a very solid option for a main event, but I’m hoping they take a break from Ambrose vs. Rollins for a while. It was a long, brutal match but the comebacks got a bit too much to handle near the end. They could have cut five minutes out of the match to make it a bit better, though it was still an excellent match with some great drama. When you can make me believe that something I know won’t happen might happen, you’re having a good match.

Overall, Money in the Bank was exactly what I was expecting it to be, which made for an entertaining show. The ladder matches were always going to be fun, meaning they were more than carrying the show. That leaves you with anything else as a bonus, which consisted of a fun Divas match and an outstanding rematch between Owens and Cena. For a show thrown together in two weeks and the third in seven or so weeks, that’s quite impressive.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: June 18, 2015
Location: First Niagara Center, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

The ending of Monday’s show saw the return of Brock Lesnar as the Authority’s big surprise to deal with Rollins, ignoring the history of Lesnar hurting HHH and then Stephanie freaking out on him the night after Wrestlemania when Lesnar destroyed everything and injured Cole, which hasn’t been mentioned on TV yet. Let’s get to it.

In memory of Dusty Rhodes.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Sheamus to get things going. Sheamus holds up the briefcase and laughs at the fans for saying he looked stupid. He feels like a million dollars and promises to be the next WWE Champion. I know it’s not a popular opinion but I wouldn’t be opposed to that. Sheamus has been making plans to get around Seth Rollins and Brock Lesnar, which would leave everyone out of his way to make him champion.

This brings out Dean Ambrose to remind Sheamus that he pinned him on Monday. Why should that matter? Money in the Bank is a shortcut around silly things like wins and losses and just lets the company put whomever they want in the title scene without putting in the effort. Anyway, Ambrose says the briefcase belongs to Reigns and Dean would have no problem getting it back to its rightful owner. Sheamus wants to fight right now but Kane comes out to uneven the odds. The match is on.

Kane/Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is smart enough to drop to the floor at the bell before he runs back in to low bridge Kane outside. The top rope elbow is broken up though and the double teaming begins. Reigns sneaks in from behind, because somehow he knew Sheamus would be waiting in the normal spot, for the DQ at 1:29.

After a break, the tag team main event is announced.

Roman wants Bray to know he never runs.

Brie Bella vs. Paige

Paige gets a jobber entrance but we’re lucky enough to get BRIE MODE. No Nikki here for a change. Brie goes after her to start but Paige drops down as you do when someone is running the ropes, only to have Brie trip over her. Paige’s superplex is countered into a sunset bomb (good looking one too) for two as we take a break. Back with Brie putting on a chinlock with her knees in Paige’s back before Paige takes her into the corner for some elbows to the jaw. Paige goes up top but Alicia Fox runs out to shove her down, setting up the Bella Buster for the pin and another BRIE MODE at 7:28.

Rating: C. Considering Brie was in there and can’t seem to handle running the ropes, this was better than I was expecting. There’s something interesting about the Divas going after Paige and her needing reinforcements (say from NXT?) and at least Alicia is 14% more competent than most of the other Divas.

The Bellas pose on the stage and Alicia is given Bella gear.

Stills of Cena vs. Owens II and then Owens attacking Machine Gun Kelly on Monday.

Owens mocks Renee Young for possibly being a Machine Gun Kelly fan but blames Kelly for putting his hands on Owens first and on Cena for not being there to save him. Kevin doesn’t need to pander to the crowd and likes it when people earn title shots, meaning there will be no open challenge. This brings in Cesaro, with headphones around his neck, who would love to get in the ring with Owens tonight. He even puts him hands on Owens’ shoulder to make sure Owens gets the point.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Bo Dallas

Before the match, Dallas calls Lana a rebound girl. She’s broken Rusev’s heart and is now with Ziggler, who definitely should have made her swipe left (online dating thing I guess). Ziggler dropkicks him at the bell but Bo grabs a cravate. Rusev is watching in the back as Ziggler ducks a right hand and hits the Zig Zag for the pin at 1:12.

Rusev freaks out over a post match kiss.

Tough Enough stuff.

Xavier Woods vs. Neville

Woods takes over fast and stomps Neville about 20 times in a row. We’re already in the cobra clutch for a bit before New Day tries to get involved, drawing out the Prime Time Players to even the odds. Back in and a kick to the head looks to set up the Red Arrow but Kofi offers a distraction to break it up. Everyone on the floor gets into it and a dropkick sets up the Red Arrow to give Neville the pin at 2:57. I’m getting into this six man feud.

Here’s Seth Rollins with something to say. After looking at a clip of the end of Raw, Rollins brags about being the biggest star in WWE. However, he’s under constant scrutiny and always being disrespected by these fans. That’s what happened this Monday on Raw, as people are instantly thinking Lesnar will be the next WWE Champion. Rollins was shocked when he saw Brock but at Battleground, he’s going to get to prove that he really is the diamond and he can’t wait.

We recap Bray’s promo on Reigns from Raw.

Ambrose asks Reigns how long it takes Sheamus to do his hair but Reigns is focused on Wyatt. Dean asks about Bray but Reigns doesn’t want to talk about it. Just handle business tonight so he can get home to his family.

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

Non-title and Owens pops Cesaro in the jaw to start. Cesaro does just the same to knock Kevin outside for a suicide dive. Back in and Cesaro can’t get him up for a suplex so Owens sends him face first into the post as we take an early break from a promising power brawl. We come back to a chinlock of course because how else do you expect to come back from a break? Owens finds it boring as well as he jumps to the middle rope and spins into a tornado DDT for two.

Cesaro comes back with his reverse Angle Slam for two of his own. That earns him snake eyes (a move that hasn’t been seen in a while) and the Cannonball for two, shocking Owens, because he’s a good heel who can’t believe that someone could kick out of any of his offense. A dropkick knocks Owens off the top and both guys are down again. Is there anything Cesaro can’t do? I’d bet he’s a world class knitter. Owens crotches him to break up the apron superplex and the Pop Up Powerbomb is good for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: B. Owens continues to master the power brawling style and hopefully this leads to a singles push for Cesaro. The guy is incredibly talented and the multiple languages should get WWE some international help if they let him go to some other countries for publicity. This was a fun, hard hitting match though as both guys got to throw each other around, which is always entertaining.

Time for Miz at the Movies where he talks about all the movies starring wrestlers this year. Tonight’s movie: Vendetta, starring Dean Cain and Big Show. Apparently Big Show was a jerk and Miz should have had the role, as well as the Intercontinental Title. Miz rants about his resume and wants to know why he isn’t being treated like a superstar.

Dusty Rhodes tribute video.

Sheamus/Kane vs. Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns

Ambrose and Sheamus get things going with the latter stomping away in the corner. Dean comes back with chops and punches as they’ve forgotten the whole wrestling thing so far. Everything breaks down for a bit and the Shield brethren clean house to take us to the early break. Back with Dean hitting the dropkick against the ropes on Kane but Sheamus pulls him outside to take over.

Some knees get two for Sheamus back inside and it’s off to Kane to work on the knee that was destroyed in the ladder match. Smart man that old giant. Sheamus slaps on a Brock Lock for a bit before it’s back to Kane, who gently lifts Dean throat first into the bottom rope. It’s called a catapult but that’s being more generous than it is to call Kane interesting. Dean gets in some right hands and the top rope elbow, finally allowing for the hot tag despite the bad knee.

Reigns comes in off the hot tag and cleans house with a series of clotheslines to Kane and a Samoan drop to Sheamus. The Superman Punch is broken up by Kane grabbing both Shield guys by the throat but the rebound lariat breaks it up. Dean dives on Sheamus but here’s Wyatt with the picture of Reigns and his daughter as he sings I’m A Little Teapot. The distraction lets a Brogue Kick connect for the pin on Reigns at 12:57.

Rating: C. This was fine for a long way to build up the Reigns vs. Wyatt story. There was little chance that Wyatt wasn’t going to get involved somewhere in here and that wasn’t the worst way in the world. I could go for a more sinister Wyatt who gets inside your head instead of just saying he’s scary of whatever he meant in the last few months.

Bray says Happy Father’s Day and the picture is next to Reigns to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this better than I was expecting to as they gave us a good match with Owens vs. Cesaro (no real surprise there) and nothing bad. That’s a major key to a good show these days, especially with so much stuff packed in: nothing on here was really bad. Some stuff was better than others, but everything was either quick enough to not be bad or good enough to be acceptable. Solid show this week and it went by fast.

Results

Kane/Sheamus b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Brie Bella b. Paige – Bella Buster

Dolph Ziggler b. Bo Dallas – Zig Zag

Neville b. Xavier Woods – Red Arrow

Kevin Owens b. Cesaro – Pop Up Powerbomb

Kane/Sheamus b. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose – Brogue Kick to Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Makes me think of some more fantasy booking.And again, this isn’t anything revolutionary and isn’t meant to be.

So the story is that the Divas on the main roster aren’t willing to help Paige out against the Bellas.  Therefore, Paige is in need of someone to help her out.  Maybe she goes back to her roots.  Back to where she started.  Back down to NXT.  Not for a fresh start or anything, but for reinforcements.  Like……Sasha Banks, Bayley, Charlotte and Becky Lynch.

I know you hear about these invasion storylines all the time, but in this case I dig the idea.  Why not use this opportunity to bring some of them up and breathe some much needed life into that division?  Is anyone going to miss Layla or Tamina or Eva Marie or even Natalya?  Bring in some fresh blood and cut some of these girls that never do anything.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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We’re past Elimination Chamber (I won’t be doing a Reviewing the Review for that as I pretty much said everything I was going to say on the last podcast) and less than two weeks away from Money in the Bank, which means we already know most of the people in the ladder match because we have to get there as soon as possible. Tonight is the first part of the rushed build to the show so let’s get to it.

We open with the Authority (YAY!) to complain about Ambrose stealing the title last night but get Roman Reigns instead. A ladder match is set up for Money in the Bank with Rollins defending against Ambrose and Seth saying he doesn’t need the Authority. This would be the teenage rebellion years against Mommy and Daddy Helmsley. Stephanie went into full on evil Stephanie mode against Reigns but HHH called her off and said Reigns had to defend his Money in the Bank spot right now.

This wasn’t the worst opening segment as thankfully they kept it to the point and didn’t let Stephanie take Roman apart for a change. Ambrose vs. Rollins was set up in a hurry but you have to do that on the two week build. It’s not a bad way of getting things done but, as usual, Stephanie added nothing here.

Reigns successfully defended his spot against King Barrett because Barrett can take yet another loss right? Then he successfully defended it against Mark Henry because who cares about Henry? Then he successfully defended it against Bray Wyatt because his push is as up and down as Barrett’s. This was the old Chris Jericho Intercontinental Title marathon idea (also involving Stephanie actually) and it worked well enough. If they build up Reigns as someone who has to keep overcoming the odds, they might get people to care about him for a change.

Ryback didn’t have a match against Miz because Big Show returned and set up a title program. I can live with Big Show in this role FAR easier than in the main event, though I’m still not thrilled with seeing him. If he’s just there to put Ryback over though, everything should be fine for the most part. If Ryback can Shell Shock him, the place will come unglued. Well probably mostly glued together but there will be cracks.

Now we get the really good moment of the night as Kevin Owens came out and delivered an amazing victory speech about how he proved himself to be the better man last night as he pinned John Cena in the middle of the ring. Owens talked about his son being a John Cena fan and how last night, he defeated Super Cena in the middle of the ring because he’s a real man and role model who does everything he promises to do.

Cena came out and gave his Serious Cena speech about how Owens isn’t a real man because he got so obsessed with being a role model that he stopped acting like a man is supposed to. Cena talked about how he does things for kids, including one in the crowd wearing Cena gear and holding a sign saying “I’m beating cancer.” I’ve heard people saying this was faked or staged and it just makes me shake my head. Not everything is some concocted work people. Stop looking for things that aren’t there and enjoy a cool moment. Anyway John says he won’t give up and is ready for Money in the Bank. Outstanding.

New Day came out to talk about having Kofi winning Money in the Bank and retaining their Tag Team Titles, complete with sound effects. This led to Kofi losing to Dolph Ziggler and New Day losing a six man tag to Ziggler and the Prime Time Players, who would go on to become #1 contenders (in case that wasn’t COMPLETELY OBVIOUS ALREADY) a few days later on Smackdown.

Now we get to the stupid part of the show, as Nikki Bella successfully defended her Divas Title against Paige by seemingly turning heel yet again (assuming you considered her a full on face) by having her sister do Twin Magic with her. Yes, Brie Bella, who is mostly pale by comparison and lacking various surgical augmentations and with different color hair, is apparently still close enough to her sister’s looks that the referee couldn’t tell the difference between the two of them. I’ve heard that this was damage control from the whole “all black wrestlers look alike” backlash from Payback and that’s not the most out there theory in the world.

Sheamus beat up Orton with a chair for a DQ in a Money in the Bank preview match. I’m a fan of both guys but these two have some of the most horrible main event level chemistry I’ve seen in a long time. They can have good matches against almost anyone else but they just don’t work against each other.

Rusev said he was a broken man. My heart is the thing that’s breaking.

Neville beat Bo Dallas in a shortened version of their Elimination Chamber match.

Ambrose came out to save Reigns to end the show after the Wyatt match.

Other than Cena and Owens, this show was pretty uneventful. It’s part of the problem of setting up your major matches in the first ten minutes: after that, what else is there to do for the rest of the night? Well other than have non-twins act like twins all over again because referees are that stupid. This show was much more dull than last week, but I’ll take dull over rage inducing any day. I’m looking forward to the night after Money in the Bank so we can FINALLY get to a normal schedule again because this is starting to get old.

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