Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 13,00
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I can barely remember anything about it. Aside from the Rumble the big matches are the Rock challenging CM Punk for the WWE Title in the most obvious ending ever and Alberto Del Rio defending his newly won World Heavyweight Championship against Big Show in a last man standing match. Other than that we’ve only got HELL NO vs. the Rhodes Scholars to complete the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending. This is just after Flair passed the Figure Four to Miz, starting the worst period of his career. Miz grabs a headlock to start and gets two off an elbow to the jaw. The headlock takes Cesaro down to the mat but he fights up and grabs one of his own. Back up and Miz tries a leapfrog but gets caught in midair with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champion takes over and cranks on both of Miz’s arms before getting two off a Michinoku Driver.

A hard European uppercut sets up the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the double arm. Back up again and Miz slips out of a slam and hooks the Reality Check for two. There’s the running clothesline in the corner and Miz goes up but hurts his knee on the top rope ax handle. Cesaro gets caught with his feet on the ropes, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. Antonio misses a running knee in the corner but is still able to roll away from the Figure Four. Cesar takes him to the floor and rams Miz into the metal underneath the ring. Miz is out cold so Cesaro Neutralizes him for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Miz just doesn’t work in a lot of these matches and the Figure Four doesn’t work in the slightest. Thankfully he wouldn’t be featured very prominently for a while as there was just nothing to him for the most part. Cesaro still needs to get a push as he’s more talented and marketable than half the roster but instead we get people like Miz.

The opening video is about time passing and how no one has enough. This ties into Punk’s time as champion with Rock saying the reign ends tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing match, which is a rematch with the same stipulations from when Alberto won the title a few weeks ago. Del Rio turned the announce table on top of Big Show so Big Show turned it on top of him a few weeks later. Alberto is shown in the back and he runs into Bret Hart for no apparent reason whatsoever. Bret says Alberto reminds him of a Mexican version of himself. Alberto calls Bret a Canadian Del Rio and Ricardo gushes, earning him Bret’s sunglasses. What a bizarre cameo.

Some hard chops have Del Rio in early trouble and a slam gets a five count. Alberto chops away but jumps off the middle rope right into a chop to change control right back. The champion dropkicks the giant’s knee out but the low superkick actually knocks Big Show up from his knees to his feet. A hurricanrana and a seated senton put Big Show down and Alberto gets a breather. It’s amazing how much more interesting Del Rio is by doing this lucha stuff instead of his arm work. The arm stuff is good but this is such a nice change of pace.

Big Show blocks the armbreaker with one arm and slams Del Rio down, sending him outside. Del Rio gets back in as Big Show gets a chair but the champion dropkicks him in the ribs to knock it out of his hands. A series of chair shots (crowd: “SI! SI! SI!”) has Big Show down but Alberto dives into a chokeslam for an eight count. We head outside again with Del Rio getting chopped to the floor with ease. This is a very slow paced match so far.

A pair of low blows puts Big Show down in the aisle but he’s up at nine. Show hits something resembling a DDT on the floor before sending Del Rio into the set. He rips a piece of the set, resembling a light tube, and blasts Del Rio over the back. Since this is WWE there’s a table readily available and Big Show takes the champion on top of the set for a chokeslam through the table. The bump looked awesome but he’s again on his feet at nine.

The beating takes Del Rio back to the ring and Show loads up the WMD. Alberto sees it coming and rolls outside, only to have Big Show throw Ricardo around for fun. Big Show misses a charge through the barricade (clearly heavily padded) for five but a long series of chair shots has him down again. Del Rio crushes the arm between the steps and a chair, but Alberto follows up with a fire extinguisher blast to the face for no apparent reason. Back in and the armbreaker goes on, but Ricardo ups the ante by duct taping Big Show’s legs to the ropes. The giant can’t get up and Alberto retains the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but it was very slowly paced and the ending made Del Rio look more clever than tough. It also doesn’t help that the match was the same gimmick they did less than a month ago. Face Alberto was a nice guy but they cut the cord just six months after this. Not bad, but Del Rio winning the title here would have been much better.

Send Slim Jims to the military!

Ziggler isn’t worried about being in the Rumble and AJ threatens Matt Striker with Big E. Langston for implying Ziggler can’t win. Langston does one of the most mind blowing imitations of an annoying reporter while asking Ziggler for his thoughts on the main event. Dolph has little of note to say but no one was hearing him after Big E.’s bit anyway.

Cesaro says he’ll continue the streak of non-Americans winning the Rumble.

The Prime Time Players……WE’RE GETTING RUMBLE PROMOS!!!! Anyway they say anyone that thinks they’ll eliminate either of them is getting a penalty flag.

Orton says he’s perfect for the Rumble because it’s every man for himself.

Cena is ready for the Rumble because it means he can be champion again.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett says he’ll restore credibility to the Rumble.

Sheamus says he won the Rumble last year and he’ll do it again tonight.

Ryback isn’t any catchphrase and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles, but he’ll see food every 90 seconds. Feed him more.

We recap Miz vs. Cesaro on the pre-show.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars are challenging. Cody kicks Bryan in the ribs as Cole references Queen lyrics. Bryan spins out of a wristlock and the fans chant for Cody’s mustache. Cody’s leapfrog is countered into a surfboard and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick and a two count. Rhodes scores with a dropkick of his own and drives Kane into the corner for the tag off to Sandow. Kane easily powers Sandow into the corner because, you know, he’s Damien Sandow and it’s off to Bryan for the YES Kicks.

JBL rants about Cole and Lawler hugging as Kane kicks Sandow in the face, knocking him out to the floor. The FLYING GOAT takes out the challengers but Cody low bridges Bryan to the floor to take over. Back in and a half crab has Daniel in trouble but he reverses into a small package to escape. Damien comes in again and drops an elbow for two before dropping the Wind-Up Elbow.

After some knees to the back it’s Cody in again but he charges into a boot in the corner. Sandow breaks up a hot tag attempt and Cody puts Bryan in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Daniel slides down to escape and makes the tag to Kane. Sandow is tossed around like a rag doll but a Cody distraction prevents the top rope clothesline. Kane grabs both guys by the throat and Bryan tags himself in. The Scholars double suplex Kane but Bryan shoves Cody into a chokeslam and Daniel YES Locks Sandow to retain.

Rating: C. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw around this time which means it was fine. The Scholars were a nice idea for a team but it was clear that they had no chance at this point given how low their individual stocks were. Kane and Bryan gelled perfectly well as a team and Bryan would get far bigger very soon.

Rumble By The Numbers which I’ve typed many times already.

HELL NO celebrates in the back when Vickie Guerrero comes up and gives them their Rumble numbers. Daniel shows Kane his but Kane won’t show Bryan.

We look at the Royal Rumble Fan Fest which is another name for Axxess. This included a tournament of NXT wrestlers for a spot in the Rumble, won by Bo Dallas.

Royal Rumble

Ziggler is #1 which he picked (the other option was #2) after winning a Beat the Clock Challenge on Raw. Dolph says he’ll win and doesn’t care who he faces first, bringing out a returning Chris Jericho at #2. This was a complete shock and the roof is blown off the building. Also remember that Ziggler beat Jericho to send him out of the company to give us some history. The clock is at 90 seconds between entrants this year.

Jericho is quickly sent to the apron but comes back with a top rope ax handle. Now it’s Dolph on the apron as the fans tell Jericho he still has it. When did Jericho ever come close to losing it? A superplex brings Ziggler back into the ring and Cody Rhodes is in at #3. Jericho hammers away on him but Ziggler gets in a cheap shot as the double teaming begins. Chris knocks Ziggler down and puts Cody in the Walls but Dolph makes the save.

Dolph catapults Jericho throat first into the bottom rope as Kofi Kingston is in at #4. Kofi immediately speeds things up and pounds away on Cody but can’t hit Ziggy with Trouble in Paradise. Ziggler is thrown to the apron and all four guys try to eliminate each other at the same time in the same spot. Santino Marella is #5 and he sends all four to the apron before loading up the Cobra. Everybody is back in and even though Santino takes Kofi down with the sock, it’s Cody backdropping Marella out.

Drew McIntyre of 3MB is #6 and gets to fight Kofi as everyone else takes a breather. Back up and it’s time to lay on the ropes while trying to eliminate people. Jericho is sent over the ropes but he keeps his feet off the ground and gets back in. Titus O’Neil is in at #7 to add some power, including taking Cody and Kofi down with a double clothesline. Cole finally tells us that the bark is a shout out to his fraternity from Florida. Thank you for explaining that to us after two years.

Jericho throws out McIntyre but can’t do the same to Ziggler as Goldust is #8. Cody gets ready for the showdown and the fans are WAY into this. They trade the kneeling uppercuts and Goldie stomps on Cody for a bit. The fans chant for Goldust and it’s David Otunga (remember him?) is in at #9. The announcers ignore the match to talk about the commentators being in the Rumble last year as people start to pair off.

Nothing much happens until Heath Slater is in at #10. That gives us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Kingston, O’Neil, Goldust, Otunga and Slater at the moment. Slater fires off right hands to Kofi as Jericho calls spots to Ziggler. Dolph gets stuck on the apron again and Sheamus is #11 to clear out some bodies. He destroys everyone with his usual stuff before sending Titus to the apron for the ten forearms. Otunga is thrown onto Titus to get rid of O’Neil before ten forearms and a Brogue Kick get rid of the lawyer. Tensai, still the Japanese lunkhead, is #12.

Everybody goes after Tensai to make a big cluster in the corner. That goes nowhere at all so Brodus Clay comes in at #13. We get a Tons of Funk preview before Goldust backdrops Cody to the apron, only to get pulled to the apron as well. Cody gets back in and sends Goldust into the post for the elimination and a lot of booing. Rey Mysterio is #14 to make the crowd happy again. Ziggler and Jericho get quick 619s and the top rope splash crushes Jericho. Things slow down a bit until we reach the halfway point with Darren Young at #15.

A bunch of guys join forces to dump Brodus and Kofi puts out Tensai a few seconds later. Now we get to the part that everybody was waiting on as Kofi is knocked off the apron, only to land on Tensai’s back. He jumps onto the announcers’ table as he tries to figure this out. Why he doesn’t just jump two feet to get onto the steps is beyond me. Bo Dallas is #16 as this is going on. Instead of the steps, Kofi gets JBL’s office chair and pogos his way back to the ring. Kingston pulls Darren out of the ring but gets caught with the Disaster Kick for the elimination before he can get back inside.

Godfather gives us the nostalgia pop at #17 and is dropkicked out by Ziggler four seconds later. He seems ok with that and leaves with his women. The whole point was the entrance anyway so I have no issue with that. Wade Barrett is in at #18 as the ring is getting too full. Everything slows down again and John Cena is #19 to clear out some tired people. Everybody gets ready for him so Cena comes a charging. John fights them all off and throws out Slater and Cody but can’t dump Jericho.

Damien Sandow is #20, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Mysterio, Dallas, Barrett, Cena and Sandow. Mysteiro and Barrett fight to the apron and a big forearm puts Rey out. Sheamus goes right after Wade as Jericho tries to put Cena in the Walls. Daniel Bryan is #21 and fires off kicks to Sandow. Now it’s Barrett getting the kicks as everyone else is down. Sheamus and Bryan try to put Jericho out but he slides back in under the ropes.

Antonio Cesaro is in at #22 and gets in a fight with Sheamus as the fans start the dueling Cena chants. Everybody is back up now and Great Khali is #23. It’s chops all around until things calm a bit. Kane comes in at #24 to fire things up again (get it?) but the ring is too full. It gets even worse with Zach Ryder coming in at #25 but HELL NO dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro dumps Bryan into Kane’s arms. Daniel: YES! Kane shouts no and drops Bryan for the elimination in a funny bit.

Randy Orton is #26 and it’s powerslams all around. Ziggler and Dallas get a double Elevated DDT and it’s an RKO for Ryder, followed by the elimination. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as Cesaro lifts Cena up, only to be eliminated himself. Ziggler gets launched to the ropes but slides back in as Miz is #28. He gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle and limps into the ring to sell the ankle injury from earlier. Sheamus dumps Mahal and Sin Cara is #29.

Cara tries an enziguri on Ziggler which misses by four inches but Ziggler sells it anyway. Bo Dallas pulls Barrett out in an elimination that should have led further than it did. Miz sends Jericho to the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out from the floor. Ryback is #30 to give us a final grouping of Ryback, Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Cena, Sandow, Orton, Miz and Sin Cara. Damien is out first and Sin Cara quickly follows. Miz tries to power Ryback out and is tossed as well to get us down to six. Jericho is somehow still alive and hits a Lionsault on Cena but the springboard dropkick doesn’t eliminate Sheamus.

Ziggler backdrops Jericho to the apron and superkicks him out (missed as well but he’s spent at this point) but walks into an RKO. There’s one for Cena as well and Sheamus gets the third. That leaves Ryback to fight Orton but the monster gets taken down with an Elevated DDT. Ryback fights off the RKO and clotheslines Randy out to get us down to four. Ziggler DDTs Cena down but a Brogue Kick puts Dolph on the floor.

It’s Sheamus, Ryback and Cena with Ryback getting double suplexed down. Cena and Sheamus make things serious by LOOKING AT THE SIGN. John takes over but Ryback runs him over with a clothesline. Sheamus escapes the Shell Shock, looks at the sign, and hits White Noise on Ryback. The Brogue Kick is countered with a backdrop to eliminate Sheamus and we’re down to two.

They LOOK AT THE SIGN and do their signature taunts before Ryback spinebusters Cena down. The Meathook is countered into the STF and Ryback passes out, leaving him as dead weight. Ryback fights out of the corner and Cena’s head into the mat. He loads up a powerslam but Cena slips out the back and shoves Ryback out for the win and title shot at Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. It’s a good but not great Rumble. That being said, there was almost no other option to win here, even though it set up the rematch that no one wanted to see. There’s certainly some good stuff in it and there were no down spots, but you would expect more big moments than we got here.

Coming Home ad for Wrestlemania. That still should have been Wrestlemania XXX.

We recap CM Punk vs. The Rock. It’s a basic story: Punk has been champion for 434 days and Rock is getting a title shot because he’s the Rock, which was kind of a lame reason, especially when the shot was announced six months ago. That began a countdown that made everything Punk did meaningless, because there was no way it would be anyone but Rock taking the belt from him here. Yeah Punk got in some shots on Rock before the match, but this was as much of a layup as you could get. Also if Shield or anyone interferes, Punk is stripped of the title.

Rock, after waiting for them to chant his name, says he isn’t worried about Shield, even though they busted up his lung recently. He goes on a rant about how many hard things he’s been through, but redeems himself a bit by talking about his mom getting cancer but beating it to be here tonight. Punk has said that the people don’t count but Rock says every single one of them count to him. He reaches his hand out to everyone that believes in the Rock so he can get their power, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock celebrates for about three minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah it’s a good show overall, but the major problem is obvious: there was no other possibly ending other than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania 29 and almost everyone knew it. The show is definitely entertaining and actually really good at times, but it was so telegraphed up and down the card that it offers almost no excitement at all, even on the initial viewing. Still though, worth checking out if you have nothing else to do.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Original: B

Redo: C-

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Original: C

Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: B

The Rock vs. CM Punk

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

That original overall rating is too high for what I gave everything else. Also I think the original last man standing match rating is closer to the accurate one. It just didn’t hold up as well on a second viewing, but it was good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/27/royal-rumble-2013-by-the-book-and-still-awesome/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Raw was back in New Orleans for the first time since the night after Wrestlemania last year, meaning the fans are going to be hot all night. The big story is the return of Daniel Bryan and how serious he seems to be about winning the Rumble and main eventing Wrestlemania again. The key thing is this gives us a new option other than Reigns for the top spot, which is far more interesting than just having the long choice. Let’s get to it.

To the shock of no one paying attention, we opened with a long promo between Cena and the Authority, talking about things that happened back at Survivor Series. Basically Cena thinks the Authority sucks (and he has a HASHTAG for it) and he’s going to win the WWE Title to get Ryback, Rowan and Ziggler their jobs back. See, he’s going to win the title and then leave, because that’s going to make the Authority miss him. I’m not sure if this was supposed to be a jab at Lesnar, but it came off as more of a stupid idea than anything else.

HHH and Stephanie came out and offered Cena a deal: the trio can have their jobs back if Cena can beat Rollins in a lumberjack match right now. So to recap, in the span of a month, Cena and Rollins have had a regular match, a tables match, a (really good) cage match and a lumberjack match.

In a logical world, that should be months and months of matches, not a single month. It shows how WWE feels desperate to keep people watching with quick fixes instead of setting this stuff up. As usual, I’ll point you to NXT. You know what you don’t see a lot of there? Gimmick matches. The gimmick matches, when they happen, are to blow off a feud. Neville fought Dallas in a ladder match and you see a few 2/3 falls matches in there. They let the regular stories build up to the gimmicks instead of just throwing them all out there at once, which makes them mean more.

In NXT, you hear the words “ladder match” and gasp because it’s something very rare and therefore special. In WWE you hear the words ladder match and roll your eyes because they have at least three a year between MITB and TLC. The same is true of cage matches, which happen WAY too often on Raw and with almost no build.

That’s another issue with the lumberjack match on Monday: they had all of five minutes’ notice. How are the fans that might want to see it supposed to know? Hope that they read Twitter? Is that really what you’re hoping for? It’s a bad idea and amazingly enough, it doesn’t seem to be anything successful.

As for the match itself, of course Rollins won with interference. It was entertaining enough and a good match, but I’m tired of seeing them fight. You know they’re just waiting on a reason to bring the trio back and I’d be shocked if they weren’t in the Rumble, making this entire storyline a waste of time. You know, like so many other things you see in WWE anymore, which is really getting old.

Due to their comments about the trio being fired on Smackdown, Stephanie punished the Usos by making Naomi wrestle with an arm tied behind her and Ambrose has to see a psychiatrist or he’s out of the Rumble. Simple idea, but the Naomi thing sounds destined to fall flat.

Dean’s evaluation was of course a comedy segment with him freaking out over the doctor’s clock, calling Stephanie a HO in a funny bit and switching roles with the doctor. Other than the Stephanie bit, there really wasn’t much to see in this and I really wish they had done something more with it. It’s a very good sign that Dean is still getting a focus, even though he was completely and totally buried by losing in pay per view main events right? That’s how it works no?

The New Day beat Kidd and Cesaro in an average match. I really like Kidd and Cesaro as a team, even though they see to be little more than jobbers at this point. Why are they jobbers you ask? It’s because that’s the role they were given when the team was put together and screw you if you think they should rise up the card, because that’s the role they’re given and nothing is going to change that. That seems to be the mentality in WWE way too often and unfortunately it rarely changes.

Big Show came out, talked about being an awesome giant and ran away from Reigns and his horrible scripted promos. They’ve been doing this FOREVER now and I really hope they blow this off at the Rumble instead of taking it all the way out to Fast Lane. As for Reigns’ promos, his delivery is fine but Steve Austin on his best day would have trouble getting over this horrible material.

Now the interesting part for Reigns came when he had a really entertaining match against Luke Harper. The key here though was Harper, who looked absolutely awesome. The stuff that he can do at his size is incredible and he looks like one of the best guys on the roster today. Why can’t he and Reigns be having a great feud and beat the tar out of each other for weeks on end? Instead we have Big Show because he was a big deal like, years ago. I really hope Harper gets a push in the future because he’s more than earned it at this point.

Mizdow reveals that he’s been filming Miz in his home, much to Miz’s chagrin. They need to split them eventually and this might work. As usual, I like that it’s something interesting and unique to the characters. It’s actual writing for the characters instead of writing for the story and putting the characters in. Those are two very, very different things. One is good and the other is what makes wrestling hard to sit through.

Alicia Fox beat Naomi in a dull match with Naomi’s arm tied behind her back. See, it’s Total Divas AND the Authority stories combined! HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY TOP THIS???

Lesnar and Heyman came out and said they’re awesome. This is basically a way to say Lesnar is coming for Rollins too. I really don’t care about Lesnar at this point because he’s been gone for so long and it’s ruined so much of the main event scene.

Miz beat Jey Uso to continue a feud that is long since over. Once the Naomi Goes Hollywood stuff went away, the feud died in a hurry.

Daniel Bryan and Stephanie (because she isn’t on this show enough) came out and did their usual thing. They really are just doing the same story over again….and I’m not sure how to feel about that. If Bryan wins again, it’s Bret Hart winning at Wrestlemania X. If Bryan doesn’t get there……I’m really interested to see where he goes from there. I’d be fine seeing him win though. Kane came out and got beaten up for his efforts, setting up their match on Smackdown.

Now we get to the part of the show I liked best. Rollins was in the back when Heyman and Lesnar came up to him. Lesnar simply threatened him and Rollins didn’t blink. Instead he looked Lesnar in the eye said he’s the future. Heyman was a key here as he sounded worried and offered an alliance to take out Cena. Seth stood there and the camera stayed on their faces the whole time for a great visual.

For the first time ever, I completely buy Rollins as a main event player, but the key here is he has the resume to back it up. Look back to Royal Rumble 2008 when Jeff Hardy was pushed against Randy Orton. That entire show was built around the idea that Hardy could win and it sold like nothing had in years.

However, at the end of the day, it was all hype because Hardy didn’t have the resume to be a believable World Champion. Now though, Rollins has both the resume and the skill to take the title at the Rumble and that little sliver of a chance makes the whole thing that much more interesting. This felt like a turning point and it couldn’t come at a better time.

Brie Bella beat Paige in a nothing match.

Bray Wyatt is in the Rumble and Randy Savage is in the Hall of Fame. Guess which one of these things gave me the biggest and most genuine smile I’ve had in wrestling in years.

Ascension destroyed more jobbers.

Rusev beat Ambrose via referee stoppage. Again, a loss due to an existing knee injury isn’t going to cripple Ambrose’s push and I continue to chuckle when people insist he’s being shoved down the card.

The Authority moderated a three way contract signing between Lesnar, Rollins and Cena. Again, Seth stood toe to toe with both of them and looked on their level. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is that Rollins has this kind of star power already. I’ll give you two guesses how this went. Thankfully it was Seth standing tall.

Oh yeah we’re in Rumble season and it’s working just as it’s supposed to. Rollins being added to that title match has made the whole thing feel so much more interesting and fresh, which is exactly what it’s been missing. I’m not sure who is coming out of that match with the title but I really want to see where it goes. The same is true of the Rumble itself, as suddenly it’s gone from the Roman Reigns show to “can Bryan do it again?” Adding something to the mix makes things that much better.

On the other hand you have the midcard, where things are stagnant again. Big Show vs. Reigns, Usos vs. Miz/Mizdow, Mizdow going solo, Rusev beating up various people and winning or escaping every time and Total Divas in general have all felt like they’ve been going on for months and it’s really hard to care at this point. Hopefully things shake up in the Rumble and it couldn’t happen at a at a better time. This week was a good show, mainly because they’re adding stuff into the main event scene to freshen it up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 12, 2015
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re back in the same building as the excellent post Wrestlemania Raw and the big story is what happens to the three guys (Ziggler, Ryback and Rowan) who were fired last week. The Authority is running roughshod on the company all over again and the question is will Cena be able to focus on his war against the team and get the title back from Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Authority’s return to Raw last week (after being on the show the previous week) and firing Erick Rowan, Dolph Ziggler and Ryback to end the show, followed by a major celebration for John Cena.

Here’s Cena to open the show. He doesn’t seem all that upset after costing three people their jobs last week. Cena talks about how New Orleans is about having a good time, even though the Authority is back in power. He can’t believe he works for two people who got their jobs back because their whipping boy held a Hall of Famer hostage and made Cena gamble with his health. That’s the same decision he would make every time though because it’s the right thing.

HHH is a first ballot Hall of Famer and one of the best of all time but he’s only going to be remembered as a slimy villain who wants to make us all miserable. Last week the Authority fired three men so Cena has to appeal to the audience. Did any of them deserve to be fired? Do the fans want to see them back tonight? Cena asks us to to go on social media and use the hashtag Authoritysucks to voice their opinions.

However, Cena has a backup plan: win the WWE World Heavyweight Title at the Royal Rumble. As soon as he can say THE CHAMP IS HERE, is the very moment that he can say you can’t see me. He’ll win the championship and go home until those three guys are rehired, or else this show’s most coveted prize is going away and won’t be at Wrestlemania.

This brings out the Authority with smirks on their faces. Stephanie laughs off the Authoritysucks bit and says the three guys will be thrilled to see Cena win the title and walk away. HHH expected more than seeing Cena take his ball and go home. He recaps Survivor Series again and talks about how the Authority was gone, but now they’ve found a way back in. A hero wouldn’t turn his back on WWE, but the Authority is going to give Cena another chance.

HHH polls the audience about bringing the three guys back and, upon hearing an affirmative reply, asks Cena how much he wants those three back. All Cena has to do to get their jobs back is win his match tonight. Cena asks how many guys he’s up against tonight but HHH says it’s nothing that complicated. It’s a one on one match with Seth Rollins but they’re going to make it a lumberjack match to keep things fair. Here come the lumberjacks because the match starts right now.

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

We have Big Show, Kane, Cesaro and pretty much every other heel on the roster as lumberjacks. Rollins stomps him down to start and throws Cena to the floor for the traditional beating. A clothesline puts Rollins on the floor and he isn’t touched as we go to a break. Exactly as you would expect so far, meaning it’s time to crank it up in a few minutes when the NCAA National Championship game starts.

Back with Cena in trouble after Barrett tripped him during the break. Booker is calling this whole situation unfair as he’s the good guy commentator. The ProtoBomb sets up the Shuffle and the AA but the Stooges get on the apron, allowing Rollins to get outside. Cena dives onto the pile of lumberjacks and Fandango is holding his knee. I’ll let you make your own dancing jokes. Back in and Cena covers for two, only to eat the low superkick for the same. Seth goes up top and counters a superplex attempt into an across the ring buckle bomb for two. That kind of power out of Rollins always surprises me.

Cena tries a pop up powerbomb but doesn’t get under Rollins enough, making it look more like a spinebuster. Seth flips out of the AA and hits a standing Sliced Bread #2 for another near fall. There’s another AA but the lumberjacks (including Fandango who seems to be fine) pull Cena to the floor for a beating, including the Cesaro Swing into the barricade. Back in and the Curb Stomp is countered into the STF but Kane pulls Rollins’ arm towards the ropes. It turns into a tug of war over Rollins but Big Show pulls Cena to the floor for the KO Punch, giving Rollins the pin at 13:50.

Rating: B. This worked well but I’m really tired of seeing these two fight. In the span of less than a month, they’ve now had a regular match, a tables match, a cage match and a lumberjack match. That should be at least four months worth of matches but we’re getting it in four weeks. They’ve done the same thing with Ambrose vs. Wyatt and it’s having the same result: it’s really hard to care about what we’re seeing because they just had another big match a week or so ago.

The Usos are in Stephanie’s office when Dean Ambrose comes in. All three of them had some negative things to say on Smackdown about the firings. That’s fine and there are no firings. The Usos go to leave, but Stephanie stops them and asks Jimmy to tell Naomi that she’s competing with one arm behind her back tonight. As for Dean, he checked himself out of the hospital last week so he might be a danger to himself. Therefore, tonight he has to pass a psychiatric evaluation or he’s out of the Rumble. This has some potential if they do it right.

Miz talks about his close friend George Clooney winning the Cecil B. DeMille Award last night at the Golden Globes. Keep it up and he’ll win a Slammy.

It’s already time for the evaluation. Dean thinks he’s here because he’s been a “bad widdle boy.” Ambrose is freaked out by the doctor’s ticking clock and we go to a break. I love watching Dean be one step off and being all twitchy. It makes him seem like a more well rounded character instead of someone who was created in a board room to make sure he’s the best corporate character they can put together.

New Day vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

It’s Kofi and Woods in action here with Big E. and Adam Rose on the floor. Cesaro and Kidd attacked Big E. last week because New Day is just too positive all the time. So they’re just curmudgeons? I approve of this gimmick. Kofi starts with Cesaro but Kidd gets a blind tag and kicks Kofi in the chest.

Cesaro stomps away and swings Kofi into the dropkick for two. Back up and Kofi kicks everyone down to the floor before diving over to Woods for the hot tag. The Honor Roll (flipping clothesline) drops Kidd and Cesaro gets low bridged to the floor. Rose gets on the apron but his distraction doesn’t work, allowing Woods to plant him with a backbreaker, followed by a top rope double stomp from Kofi for the pin at 3:48.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here and I’m liking the fact that New Day keeps winning, as long as their first loss isn’t something totally meaningless that ends with “oh, they lost.” Speaking of losing, it’s very frustrating to see Cesaro and Kidd put together for a team, just to see them job every time. Have they actually won a match yet?

We get a barrage of wrestlers doing their best OH YEAH in honor of Randy Savage being “expected” to be inducted into the Hall of Fame tonight. Above all else, I want Xavier Woods’ NES controller hat.

The Indianapolis Colts celebrates their win yesterday like Ric Flair.

Here’s Big Show for a chat. Whoever said that all men are created equal was obviously not a giant. Most of you were probably scared on your first day of work. On his first day, he beat Hulk Hogan for the World Title. The fans chant boring but Big Show laughs them off and calls everyone losers. Competition is supposed to be good for America, but no one wants competition at work. Everyone here would stab someone in the back for job security, just like he did to Cena.

That brings him to Roman Reigns, who he doesn’t see as competition. He sees Reigns like the New York Knicks, currently on a 15 game losing streak. Show is going to knock him into the front row next to Spike Lee (longtime Knicks fan) and make him a loser. Therefore, if you like Roman Reigns, you’re a loser as well.

Cue Reigns for the big brawl but Show walks out. Reigns thought he wasn’t a threat so why is Show leaving? Roman says he doesn’t want Show’s spot, but he does remember that first title win over Hogan. He was twelve years old or so and that makes him think of a story. A long time ago in a land far away, there was a little boy named Roman Reigns. It’s the story of Jack and the Beanstalk but Roman hit the giant in the mouth. The giant ran away, and that’s why Big Show is the loser.

Roman Reigns vs. Luke Harper

This has potential. Harper hammers away in the corner to start but Reigns knocks him to the floor as we take a break less than a minute in. Back with Reigns hitting a knee lift and raking Harper’s face across the rope. Three straight suplex attempts are blocked and Roman counters into a kind of Jackhammer. Someone really should use that as their finisher again. Harper dropkicks him out to the floor and sends Reigns hard into the steps. Back in and Harper busts out a freaking slingshot hilo for two. That’s not something a guy his size should be able to do.

Reigns comes back with a neckbreaker but Harper rips the face to break up the Samoan drop. Luke’s powerbomb is countered into something like the ProtoBomb. The Superman Punch is loaded up but Big Show throws a chair at Reigns. Naturally, that isn’t a DQ because wrestling rules as made up depending on the situation. A Boss Man Slam gets two for Harper but he turns into the Superman Punch. Show interferes again and Harper nails a superkick for two. The discus lariat misses though and a spear puts Harper away at 10:46.

Rating: B-. Luke Harper is a freaking STAR. He wrestles like someone Shawn Michaels’ size but has the look and size of a monster. Why aren’t we gearing up for a showdown between Harper and Reigns with Big Show being the cannon fodder? For reasons I will never understand, it looks like we’re not getting Show vs. Reigns (well, the blowoff at least as we’ve seen them fight twice already) until Fast Lane. That’s our reward for sticking with this show.

We recap the lumberjack match.

Miz talks about Boyhood winning Best Picture at the Golden Globes. It was filmed over several years with the same actors. Mizdow has been doing the same thing at Miz’s house, allowing him to film a movie called Manhood. Both guys shudder a bit.

Naomi vs. Alicia Fox

Naomi has one arm behind her back. Fox makes fun of her by trying a test of strength before getting two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. She cranks on the good arm until Naomi takes her to the floor for some rams into the apron. Back in and the ax kick gives Fox the pin at 2:37. This would be the match where you’re hit over the head with how mean the Authority is because you’re not smart enough to understand a concept without it being shown to you over and over.

Back to the evaluation, where Dean is going to look at pictures and saying the first word that comes to his mind. “THURSDAY!”

HHH – Irritable bowel syndrome

Rollins – Scumbag

Reigns – Brotha

Kane – Toothpaste

Duggan – HO!

Stephanie – HO!

Minor note here: Ambrose was bouncing up and down during the interview. It’s the little stuff like that which takes people to a new level. Instead of just sitting there waiting for his line, he’s actually doing something and staying in character. It feels so much more natural than the stiff and scripted stuff we usually get.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman for the first time in a few weeks. Heyman talks about being in New Orleans several months back, where we witnessed the Streak dying. Lesnar isn’t one to live in the past, but if he was, he would list off all of his accomplishments. No man has ever been NCAA, UFC and WWE Champion, but one beast has. Heyman however loves to live in the past and runs down the fans for being crushed when the Streak ended.

On the other hand, you have this fantasy in WWE of “then, now and forever.” The fantasy was the Streak running forever or that the Ce-Nation will rise above Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Now the idea is that Rollins is the future of the WWE, but tonight Lesnar will see both challengers face to face.

More people give us their OH YEAHS with Miz knocking it out of the park and Nikki trying to make it sexy.

Jey Uso vs. Miz

Miz hits his running clothesline in the corner to start but jumps into a shot to the ribs. Jey loads up a slam and Mizdow comes in to slam himself off the top. The partners get involved in a tug of war, allowing Miz to grab a quick Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 2:09. This feud needs to end like a month ago.

Here’s Daniel Bryan in the city where he won the World Title at Wrestlemania XXX. Bryan thinks something big happened here the last time he was in New Orleans. It slowly starts coming back to him that he won the main event of Wrestlemania XXX, which isn’t bad for a lumberjack looking B+ player. Since this is the city of his greatest accomplishment, he should declare his intention to do it all over again and win the main event of Wrestlemania XXXI.

This brings out Stephanie with a copy of her fitness DVD for Bryan, complete with a mini commercial. Bryan isn’t interested so Stephanie talks about making history at Wrestlemania XXX a couple of miles from here (the buildings are actually adjacent), but this is what she remembers. We see a clip of Kane tombstoning Bryan on the floor, steps and table. Stephanie says an A+ player not only wins the big one but stays on top.

She isn’t sure if he’s ready to do this again, but YES of course he is. Bryan: “Go ahead and raise your arms. I bet it’s a better workout than you get on that DVD. HO!” He’s an average Joe who will never stop fighting. They will never stop fighting. We will never stop fighting and go through Wrestlemania XXXI until they prove the Authority wrong again. Stephanie says Bryan’s first match back will be on Smackdown (this was already announced) against Kane. The monster comes out and the fight is on, but Bryan fights out of a tombstone on the steps and hammers away on Kane. He even busts out the Flying Goat.

Rollins is in the back when Lesnar comes up to mock the idea of Rollins winning the title. Seth stares him down and says he’s the future, but Lesnar says the future starts when he says it does. Heyman thinks maybe they can get rid of Cena together and then the best man wins. He looks very nervous about Rollins, who has stared Lesnar down the entire time. For the first time, I saw that real star power in Rollins from this one exchange. Simple but perfect.

Brie Bella vs. Paige

Natalya, Kidd and Nikki are at ringside. Paige goes right at her to start but gets sent into the buckle, allowing Brie to hit the middle rope dropkick. Paige fights out of a chinock but Kidd gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Brie to roll her up for the pin at 2:10.

After the match, Paige slaps Kidd and Natalya doesn’t seem to mind. I love Paige, but I fully support anyone wearing a cat shirt.

We look back at last week’s ambulance match.

Bray Wyatt says thirty souls enter the Royal Rumble and 29 will have to realize that they’re not in Wonerland any longer. Some will laugh, some will cry but some will sit in silence at how Bray changes the world. No one on earth will be immune to his wrath. Run.

We finally have it confirmed: Randy Savage is the first entrant of the Hall of Fame Class of 2015. He will be inducted by Hulk Hogan.

Ascension vs. ???/???

Konor takes #1 into the corner to start as JBL is ripping on the jobbers again. Booker and Cole are a bit nicer and say they have to fight whoever they’re put up against and that they’ve won every match they’ve had so far. Fall of Man ends #2 at 1:20.

Ambrose is now counciling the doctor and gets his approval on the papers to stay in the Rumble. As soon as the papers are signed and the doctor is still crying, Ambrose calls him a spineless, gutless pile of cow waste. This really could have been a better comedy idea but it wasn’t bad.

Here are Lana and Rusev to thank the Authority for firing Ryback before the showdown tonight. They also thank Cena for failing to save his friends like any American would. Maybe Ryback can get a job in a deli like he had in that stupid story a few weeks back. Rusev calls Ryback lucky for being fired and because the super American John Cena couldn’t get his job back. He was going to throw Ryback and twenty eight other men out of the Rumble, so here’s Ambrose to easily knock him to the floor.

Rusev vs. Dean Ambrose

Joined in progress after a break with Ambrose bulldogging Rusev. The Russian kicks at the knee (injured in the ambulance match) to take over and wraps it around the ropes. Dean counters the jumping superkick into a rollup for two and the Macho Elbow gets the same. The referee tries to stop the match due to the knee and has no choice after Dean is tied in the Tree of Woe at 4:38.

Rating: C. This was more of an angle than anything else and Ambrose loses again, like he almost always does. At least in this case it wasn’t through another pin or submission and the loss can be blamed on the referee more than Ambrose. I did like them planting the seeds of Cena vs. Rusev though because that’s the big match at Wrestlemania, especially if Rusev wins.

Here’s the Authority to moderate the contract signing. After everyone comes out, Heyman says he can’t take credit for bringing back the Authority because it was all Rollins’ plan. The plan was endorsed by Heyman and desperately needed by John Cena. What’s bad for Cena is good for Lesnar and best for business. Heyman doesn’t like the idea of a triple threat match because it could mean a double cross where Lesnar doesn’t have to lose to drop the title.

Rollins thanks Heyman for reciting the rules of ever triple threat match ever and asks if Lesnar is scared of a triple threat. Paul gets cut off because Rollins isn’t done. Seth doesn’t have the list of accomplishments that Lesnar have, but Lesnar doesn’t have the list that Seth has. He built and destroyed the Shield, won Money in the Bank, and pinned John Cena’s shoulders to the mat. Either by plan A (the match) or plan B (the briefcase), Rollins is is leaving with the title. Lesnar says he conquered Undertaker, HHH and Cena, so he’ll conquer Rollins at the Rumble.

Cena says it’s time for a beating and he’s walking out champion before signing. Rollins lists off all the plans that Cena has had but failed before the fight is on. Seth is knocked to the floor and Lesnar takes the AA through the table, only to have Rollins Curb Stomp Cena. There’s a Curb Stomp to Brock to end the show.  More importantly than all else: Rollins looked like an equal.  That cannot be understated.

Overall Rating: B. Yes that’s probably high but man was this show easier to sit through. They actually had some good matches and set up some stuff for the future, but most importantly of all they had a chance to breathe. Instead of just packing every thing they possibly could into the show, there were a few breaks in there and it makes things so much easier.

On top of that though, the best moments were from Harper and Rollins. Those two looked AWESOME tonight and they gave me new hopes for both of them. Harper can move like almost no one else in the company and Rollins looked like a star standing there in front of Lesnar. I had a really good time with this show (save for a bit too much Stephanie) and didn’t once feel like it was dragging on forever. That’s the most important step in the right direction they could have.

Results

Seth Rollins b. John Cena – Pin after a KO Punch from Big Show

New Day b. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro – Backbreaker/top rope double stomp combo

Roman Reigns b. Luke Harper – Spear

Alicia Fox b. Naomi – Ax kick

Miz b. Jey Uso – Skull Crushing Finale

Brie Bella b. Paige – Rollup

Ascension b. ???/??? – Fall of Man to #2

Rusev b. Dean Ambrose via referee stoppage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 29, 2014
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show of the year and WWE has managed to double book the show. There’s a house show in Virginia tonight, meaning a lot of the roster is going to be there instead of here for Raw. We do however have Cena and Lesnar guaranteed and the potential debut of the Ascension to keep us until the full roster is back to start the new year. Also in some breaking news, Daniel Bryan has a major announcement which could mean his retirement. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of Edge’s retirement a little less than four years ago. That was such a shocking moment and actually got to me a little bit. He and Christian are hosting tonight, which should be a lot of fun if they just let those two have fun.

Here are Edge and Christian to open things up. Chimmel (before doing the voice cracking deal) lists off their resumes and it’s hilarious to hear how much more Edge accomplished as a singles guy. Christian thinks we should have this show E&C style, which Edge, who appears to be wearing a Sami Zayn shirt, likes. That means we should have a special edition of the Peep Show, which Edge doesn’t like. Why not have it be the Cutting Edge instead of something that sounds like a perverted idea from the 1920s? Instead it’s going to be a Cutting Edge Peep Show with special guest Seth Rollins.

The fans aren’t thrilled, so Edge makes Rollins vs. Reigns to make them feel better. It’s Christian’s turn now as he makes Rusev vs. Ziggler in a Champion vs. Champion match……and they’ll both be completely sans clothing? Christian: “Maybe just Lana then?” He tries to get the fans back by asking if the fans would like to see Daniel Bryan and I’ll let you guess the reaction. We’ll wrap it up with a five second pose, but here’s Brock Lesnar instead. Of note here, Lawler says that both Edge AND Christian are retired, which I believe is the first official confirmation for Christian.

Heyman says both guys are too damaged to be in the same ring with someone like Lesnar, so Brock won’t hurt either of them. Instead, Heyman thinks Lesnar wants to “penetrate the virgin neck” of John Cena. Cue Cena as the Canadians kind of hide in the corner. Cena isn’t going to knock Lesnar into 2015 so he doesn’t have an excuse at the Rumble. He does have a new year’s resolution to take that title off him at the Rumble. Cena grabs Heyman by the throat but throws a charging Lesnar up for the AA, only for the champ to bail to the floor.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev

Non-title. Ziggler gets in a few cheap shots to start but Rusev nails him in the face to take over. This time the announcers talk about how no one has beaten Rusev, but don’t suggest Ziggler could be the one to beat him. Instead they’re too busy getting in Ziggler buzzwords like “stealing the show”, because getting in buzzwords and catchphrases has replaced the idea of actually calling a match. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and the swinging DDT as we head to a break.

Back with Rusev in control and putting on a side choke instead of having one on already. We get a full screen replay of Ziggler getting catapulted into the corner from the App, which isn’t the worst idea during a chinlock. Dolph fights up and tries a high cross body, only to get caught in the fall away slam. Ziggler escapes that as well and nails a middle rope dropkick to put both guys down. He tries something like the Stinger Splash (which may or may not be a tribute) but has to settle for ducking the superkick and nailing the Fameasser.

It might have injured his knee though, allowing Rusev to throw him by the leg into the corner for a smart move. What isn’t a smart move though is trying a splash when Ziggler is down in the corner. Moves like that just get on my nerves because there is no logical reason to try something like that. A kick (clearly missing) to the knee has Ziggler in trouble and Rusev stomps away in the corner for the DQ at 10:10.

Rating: C. The match was decent enough and the ending was the most logical, as at least Ziggler didn’t get destroyed and then win at the end. I’m still not feeling Ziggler on this massive push that some see, but at least he isn’t jobbing clean on free TV anymore. I’m also glad that they didn’t make this title for title as that would have made the ending even more obvious than what we had here. Ziggler could use a feud too.

Rusev puts Ziggler in the Accolade in the ropes (doesn’t really add anything) until Ryback makes the save.

Time to insult fans who are still buying the pay per views, because telling someone they’re an idiot for giving you $55 is certainly going to make them want to pay you $10 a month right?

Ryback is still in the ring after a break and he has something to say. Ever since he debuted in the WWE as Ryback (his words), there are a lot of things about him that you don’t know about him. He was a guest bell ringer at his first WWE show when he was twelve years old. Then ten years ago he got his start on Tough Enough as the Silverback. We get a clip of Ryback, then known as Ryan Reeves, being eliminated.

After that, he lost his dream job and fell into a deep depression. He didn’t talk to his family for over a year and got a job at some barbecue joint in Louisville, Kentucky with only a stack of Wrestlemania DVDs to get him through his time. Then he read a book called the Secret on being positive. It changed his life and shortly thereafter he got rehired by WWE, leading to him making his redebut as part of the Nexus. We see a clip of the awesome Nexus beatdown that introduced us to the Meat Hook.

Then he broke his ankle and leg in three places in a match in Hawaii and missed a long, long time. This led to the debut of the Ryback character, which leads us to a package on Ryback’s domination. Now he’s here, which brings Ryback to Rusev. This isn’t about the USA vs. Russia. It’s about one big guy beating up another big guy, because Ryback likes to eat big negative people. Then he looks at someone like Rusev and says FEED ME MORE.

Did I mention that half the roster isn’t here tonight and they need to fill in time? I’ll give them this though: I’d much rather have a reason to care about someone like Ryback than some lame comedy match or a bunch of chinlocks. This was a far better use of time than I was expecting so at least it could have been worse.

Nikki Bella vs. Natalya

The idea here was that Tyson was wearing a Nikki Bella hat last week and Natalya isn’t happy. To continue the annoying run of commentary buzzwords and terms, Cole says a win here could put Natalya in the title hunt. WELL WHAT ELSE HAS SHE BEEN IN FOR WEEKS NOW??? Not that it matters as Natayla kicks Nikki off the apron and into Tyson’s arms, only to have the distraction let Nikki hit the Rack Attack for the pin at 1:05. So much for Natalya’s push. Cole: “Let’s see how things play out on Total Divas this Sunday!”

Naomi comes up to hug Miz in the back, because the producers want to meet with her. She even wishes him luck in the title defense against the Usos.

John Cena came in seventh in some celebrity charity deal that no one has heard of nor cares about.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

This is the TLC rematch due to Miz using the Slammy Award for the DQ. The best thing of this match: JBL dubs Mizdow’s small titles the Subtitles. The Usos aren’t in shirts for a change. Miz hides from Jimmy in the corner to start and of course the fans want Mizdow. They feel each other out a bit until Jimmy sends Miz into the corner for a nice running splash. Off to Jey who eats a chinlock as the announcers, I kid you not, actually talk about the match. Jey goes into slow motion for an uppercut to Miz’s jaw before slapping on an armbar.

An even slower double atomic drop have Miz in trouble but Mizdow comes in to do the same motions. He’s dedicated if nothing else. Both champions go to the floor and the Usos aren’t sure what to think. Jimmy loads up the dive but gets snapped across the top, setting up Miz’s big boot for two. Back from a break with Miz in control on Jey but not willing to tag Mizdow. Jey misses an enziguri but makes the hot tag just seconds later. Now the big dive connects but Jimmy comes up favoring his arm or wrist. I always worry about things like that on those dives.

It doesn’t seem bad, but Miz nails the low DDT for two. Jey and Mizdow are nowhere to be seen and both guys are down. We see Mizdow down on the floor, but for once he isn’t mimicking Miz. There’s the Figure Four on Jimmy but he finally makes the rope. Still no sign of Jey. Another Figure Four attempt is countered into Konnan’s Tequila Sunrise but Mizdow comes in for the save.

It’s Mizdow eating a superkick but Miz grabs a rollup for two. The superkick drops Miz but the Superfly Splash hits Miz’s knees. The Skull Crushing Finale plants Jey for…..two? That’s not a move you see kicked out of that often. Think about it for a second. Almost no one kicks out of that. The hot tag brings in Jimmy for another superkick and a mostly missed double superkick sets up Jimmy’s Superfly Splash to give us new champions at 13:06.

Rating: B-. Well that happened and I’m actually surprised for once. That sequence with the Finale had me checking the match time and my head actually snapping to the side when the three didn’t go down. The sloppiness on the moves at the end brought things down a bit, but this was a genuine surprise and that’s a very nice thing to have on this incredibly predictable show for a change.

Naomi comes out to celebrate and the Usos say they’re going to have a big party with JR’s barbecue and champagne. Jimmy says they played Miz to get where they are here and nothing major happens. Cool surprise here and I’d assume it sets up Usos vs. Ascension.

The announcers hype up Bryan’s announcement and imply he’s retiring.

Video on Shield splitting and the beginnings of Reigns vs. Rollins to set up their match tonight.

Cesaro is in the corner ala Raven for his match but has a mic because he has a few things to get off his chest. 2014 should have been his year. He won the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal at Wrestlemania, but now WWE is telling him that he doesn’t connect. That’s true, because he delivers instead of connect. And who does he not connect with? The WWE Universe? He doesn’t care about connecting with them, because he doesn’t care about anything except what happens in this ring. No one in WWE can hold a candle to him inside this ring, and if anyone back there doubts him, come out here and make his day.

Cesaro vs. Bad News Barrett

Barrett: “It’s me it’s me it’s BNB!” He has some bad news for Cesaro: Cesaro may not care about caring with the fans, but this Bull Hammer is connecting with his head. Cesaro nails him in the face to start and stomps Barrett down in the corner. Barrett looks leaner here and seems to be playing to the crowd like a face for the first time. He knocks Cesaro to the floor but gets dropped face first onto the barricade.

Back in and a very nice top rope ax handle drops Barrett, but the announcers are of course ripping on Cesaro for slipping up and saying no one can touch him inside “these four ropes”. You know, because…..well you get the idea by now. Cesaro hits a great looking German suplex but Barrett kicks him in the side of the head for two. The pumphandle slam is countered into the Cesaro Swing but he pops up with the Bull Hammer for the pin at 3:40.

Rating: C. Well so much for Cesaro’s awesome heel promo. I’m sure there was NO ONE else to have out there for a chat before jobbing to Barrett right? As usual it’s like WWE has no idea how to set up something other than by having someone lose. Not that it matters of course as the commentators CAN’T FREAKING SHUT UP with their stupid jokes and jabs because Heaven forbid someone say one thing wrong. Keep in mind that this is MICHAEL COLE mocking people for slipping up on lines and you’ll see why this is so stupid.

Harper is in the dark again and says people like him are thrown aside like trash. He is a product of our environment and a nightmare come to life. Sweet dreams.

Jack Swagger vs. Luke Harper

Harper knocks him into the corner to start and cranks on Jack’s head a bit. A nice dropkick gets two and we hit the Gator Roll. Jack is able to take it outside though and nails a clothesline as we take a break. Back with Harper holding a chinlock and kicking Jack hard enough that JBL stops mocking Cole and calls the match. We hit another chinlock as the filler for this show continues.

Swagger fights up and hits the usual to set up the Patriot Lock. You know Luke isn’t tapping to that though so it’s a superkick for two. Harper touches the sides of his own head like he’s hearing voices for a bizarre bit that totally fits him. The Patriot Lock gets the same result but the Vader Bomb hits knees. Harper’s discus lariat (JBL: “Clothesline From Smell!”) is enough for the pin at 9:46.

Rating: C-. This is exactly the kind of thing I’d like to see more often: two guys have a match, one guy wins with his finisher, no interference etc. Harper got a win over a guy that means something (work with me here) and does it without Wyatt or any help. This raises his stock and reenforces Swagger’s status as a jobber to the stars. It wasn’t a great match or anything, but it just needed to be Harper getting a win and that’s what we got.

We recap the opening segment.

Cena is talking about the old times in the back with Edge and Christian until Christian brings up the time Edge beat up Cena’s dad. He leaves before death ensues and Cena and Edge have a nice feel good moment to I guess officially bury the hatchet. Wasn’t that buried liked five years ago?

Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns

Big Show is on commentary. Rollins is tentative to start and gets shoved out to the floor for his efforts. They seem to be treating this like a big deal, which is exactly what they should be doing. These guys are going to be the future of the company and a showdown should matter. Back in and Roman goes after the arm for some psychology, including a ram into the buckle.

Big Show says Rollins is the future and should be the Superstar of the Year. For once I actually agree with him. Reigns runs into a boot in the corner and they head outside for a change. It’s Rollins sending him into the corner and we hit the chinlock back inside. Show isn’t exactly being impartial on commentary but he’s actually entertaining by just cheering for Rollins.

Roman fights up and hits a nice powerbomb to send Rollins outside yet again. That goes nowhere so Reigns puts him in the ropes for the Apron Kick. That’s still a cool looking spot, but a distraction by the Stooges lets Rollins knock him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with, of course, Reigns in a chinlock. Seth starts changing strategy by kicking the knee out dropkicking Reigns for two. That ends our interesting idea phase as it’s back to the chinlock. Reigns fights up again but we hit chinlock #3 in about two minutes. No following up on the leg kick or anything. Just another chinlock.

The hold is escaped again but Rollins downward spirals him down into the buckle, only to eat a tilt-a-whirl powerslam for two. A belly to back slam gets the same as Big Show is still playing cheerleader. Rollins pops back up with an enziguri and low superkick for two as both guys are down again. This match really doesn’t have the energy that it should, but the fans haven’t been all that interested in most of the stuff they’ve seen all night. The Curb Stomp misses and Roman sidesteps the springboard knee, setting up the Superman Punch. Not that it matters as Big Show comes in for the DQ at 16:20.

Rating: C. If this is supposed to be their next big guy, they’ve got a major problem. Reigns isn’t the worst guy in the world by any stretch, but he’s just not the guy you want as the top guy right now. There’s nothing wrong with not being ready, but there is something very bad about pushing him as the next top guy when he isn’t ready. It’s crippled people before and it could ruin a lot of things for Reigns. On a side note, at least Rollins didn’t get pinned. They’ve been doing a somewhat better job of not giving bigger names meaningless losses lately.

Big Show throws Reigns over the announcers’ table and shoves all the equipment on top of him. Cole makes a big point of Reigns’ leg being crushed so this might be an injury angle.

Post break, Rollins promises to offer a New Year’s toast to John Cena on the Cutting Edge Peep Show.

We recap Wyatt vs. Ambrose, who will be having an ambulance match next week.

Bray Wyatt, sitting in the back of an ambulance, says everything must come full circle, like an ambulance taking you to a place where life begins an ends. It all ends next week but Dean died long ago. Bray and Bray alone has his soul. He closes the doors and the ambulance drives away.

Here’s Bryan, who JBL declares as being back despite not being gone more than a few weeks at most. Daniel says it’s an honor to be in this ring every single time. Who would have thought that a small kid from Aberdeen, Washington who was labeled a B+ player could have main evented Wrestlemania? No one, except for the fans. Thanks to the people, he beat HHH, Randy Orton and Batista in one night in front of 75,000 people. Five days later, he married the woman of his dreams to complete the greatest week of his life.

Then everything changed. Two days after their honeymoon ended, his dad died. Bryan was here wrestling that night and wasn’t there for his dad. Then a few weeks later, he had a career changing neck injury, and all he could do was sit at home on his couch and watch. All he wanted to do was be here in front of these people competing because it’s all that can take the pain away. He’s starting to cry as he says this.

No one cheered louder than he did when Ziggler got rid of the Authority. It was a great moment but it hurt because he couldn’t be there in the ring. He talked to everyone including Edge, who knows a thing or two about career ending injuries. You reach a point where you have to think about making a decision. He isn’t sure if all of this is worth it or not.

The fans all say NO, but Bryan wanted to make this announcement in front of all of the people. Is his career over? NO. That is not his announcement, because he is ready to fight and compete. His announcement: he will be in the 2015 Royal Rumble! Now THAT woke the crowd up.

Edge and Christian are playing the kazoos when Miz and Mizdow come up. Christian says Miz needs a Tic Tac and Edge has a puppet for a stunt double. They’ll be getting a rematch tonight…..but not for the title and not against the Usos. Mizdow is watching the puppet.

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Ascension

We already open with a gaffe, as the Ascension’s combined weight is listed as 480lbs but Cole says Konnor weighs 290 and Viktor 240. Miz immediately hides on the floor, leaving Mizdow to take a big power beating. The Fall of Man (high/low with a running back elbow from Viktor) is enough for the pin at 1:10. This worked.

Rollins would like Lesnar to join he and Cena in the ring next.

It’s time for the first ever Cutting Edge Peep Show with special guest the Walking Pile of Suck (Christian came up with that one) Seth Rollins. The Stooges come out carrying champagne and are dubbed the Geek Squad by the Canadians. Rollins says Edge and Christian pioneered a generation and he might not be here without then. Edge and Christian see this as condescending, but Rollins goes on to talk about what a great year he had.

He ended the Shield, won Money in the Bank, should have been named Superstar of the Year, and has become the future of WWE. Who else has had a better year? “Cena?” “Daniel Bryan?” “Sting?” Edge: “The Doctor of Style Slick?” Christian: “He was a jive soul bro who always lied to his friends.” Rollins, somewhat bewildered by the reference, says he wants to start a new year. The old Seth Rollins is dead and it’s going to be a new version next year.

First of all, Rollins would like Big Show to come out here. Show comes out applauding Rollins, but Rollins gets nothing when he requests Cena. Edge thinks it’s due to Rollins’ lack of charisma. Apparently Rollins wouldn’t have charisma if he had a live sex celebration right here with Big Show. Seth still wants Cena out here and nails Christian with the briefcase. Edge gets in his face but is surrounded and injured.

The villains put Edge’s head onto the briefcase until Cena runs down to ringside. Rollins stops him at ringside and says Cena knows what Seth wants. The announcers point out that Rollins wants the Authority back as Seth says Edge is a husband and father. If Cena wants Edge to be with his wife and play with his kid, Cena better give Rollins what he wants. Let’s find out if Cena is Mr. Hustle, Loyalty and Respect. Bring the Authority back or Edge gets paralyzed.

Cena finally says ok but Rollins makes Noble go to him with a mic to make sure it’s clear. John confirms that the Authority is back but Rollins loads up the Curb Stomp anyway. Cena comes in for the save but the numbers are too high. The Curb Stomp lays out Cena as Big Show tries to start an Authority chant. Lesnar and Heyman come out as Rollins and Big Show celebrate. Heyman shakes Rollins’ hand and the Authority just happens to be here to celebrate. They were there the night after Survivor Series, so they weren’t even gone five weeks. JBL is thrilled to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They should keep the roster split more often because this show was FAR more entertaining than most of the previous months. The show had a chance to breathe and a lot more stuff happened as a result. In other words, stuff had a chance to make an impact instead of jumping to something else over and over again. The worst part of the packed shows is they have to get in all the comedy/filler stuff instead of letting the important things take their time.

The wrestling wasn’t great tonight, but it felt like the show was in gear again. Between Ryback getting to talk (and not doing badly), Ascension’s debut and Bryan’s announcement, it felt like new stuff happened tonight instead of just rehashing the same stuff over and over again. The end of 2014 wasn’t kind to WWE, so maybe things are going to be looking up going into the new year. It’s better than Big Show dancing in a diaper at least…and then the Authority came back to make the last month plus Survivor Series totally meaningless. Well done WWE. You wasted the best story you’ve had all year to bring them back.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Rusev via DQ when Rusev wouldn’t stop stomping in the corner

Nikki Bella b. Natalya – Rack Attack

Usos b. Miz/Damien Mizdow – Superfly Splash to Miz

Bad News Barrett b. Cesaro – Bullhammer

Luke Harper b. Jack Swagger – Discus lariat

Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Big Show interfered

Ascension b. Miz/Damien Mizdow – Fall of Man to Mizdow

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

It’s finally time to start the build to the Royal Rumble and Lesnar vs. Cena III, which no one really wants to see but WWE has decided that it’s what we’re getting and we’re going to like it. In theory Lesnar is going to be here tonight so maybe things can get going. TLC was just a step above a disaster but there were a few bright spots so hopefully this picks things up a bit. Let’s get to it.

Jericho opened the show and talked about how awesome the crowd was. He wanted his Slammy back from Fandango, who stole it last week when Jericho wasn’t there. Instead he got Paul Heyman, who thinks he should be in charge tonight. Jericho said Heyman owes him $200 from a Best of Jericho tape in ECW. This brought them to Seth Rollins, who came out and said he beat Cena last night but had another win stolen from him, just like Sting did at Survivor Series.

Cena came out, said Rollins hasn’t learned to be a man yet, and made a cage match for later. Jericho wasn’t done yet though and made a match between himself and Heyman with the fans picking the stipulation (no holds barred, extreme rules or street fight). I think you all know where this is going, likely because this took nearly twenty five minutes to get through.

Big Show and Harper beat Rowan and Ziggler when Big Show knocked out Rowan. Again. At least it wasn’t a champion for a change.

Big E. apparently sweats on everyone. That’s the big idea about the character. Let that one sink in for a bit. Later in the night the New Day would beat the Dusts in a long match where they were clearly just filling in time.

Alicia Fox and Natalya beat the Bellas when Natalya made Brie tap out. The only thing of note here was Kidd checking on Nikki after the match.

Rusev and Lana were the guests on the Highlight Reel where Jericho implied that they wanted each other in a funny bit. Rusev actually showed some emotion here and it was actually working. The important part here was Ryback came out as Rusev’s next challenger. I could totally get behind that feud.

Kane destroyed Adam Rose in about a minute. The Bunny took a tombstone for good measure. This was a way to kill a few minutes.

Heyman and Jericho’s match never happened as we got the obvious ending of Brock returning to destroy Jericho. The best part though was Heyman saying he had no tricks up his sleeve, meaning he isn’t the Jew in jiujitsu.

Fandango came out to gloat but Reigns returned and knocked him out. Show tried to come out as well for revenge but Reigns Superman Punched him off the apron. This was how to make Reigns look like a monster and it worked really well.

Jimmy Uso beat Miz in an upset which made sense. After a break, Miz offered Naomi a spot on MizTV on Smackdown to continue the story.

Rollins still wants the Authority back.

The main event was a good cage match between Cena and Rollins which ran nearly twenty five minutes. There were several near escapes and near falls, but after Cena hit an AA from the top, Lesnar came out and destroyed him with German suplexes. Heyman shook Rollins’ hand, making it unclear of how long they had been working together, if at all. Rollins hit a Curb Stomp for the win.

Overall this show really needed the hour cut out. You could clip out five to ten minutes from the opening, the Kane vs. Rose stuff, a lot of New Day vs. the Dusts and some other stuff here and there to get this down to two hours and make it a very solid show. Unfortunately this wound up being the usual overdone episode of Raw which weighs down all the good things they had going on.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00PZ1GR7E

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, I’m holding a Holiday Special for my e-books: any two of them for just $5.  Check out the details here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/28/holiday-sale/

NOW we’ve got some competition.

We’ll start with the most recent, on December 4’s NXT. This was the final push before R-Evolution with Neville saying Sami has had a great career and has a lot to be proud of. Zayn wasn’t going to accept that though and cut the promo of a lifetime, talking about how no one, including Neville, could tell him what he could be proud of because nothing he did mattered without that NXT Championship. I was drooling to see these two go at it for the title the next week and they blew the roof off the place.

I would put Rock, Lana and Rusev in this, but that promo just killed Rusev’s heat and there was no way he’d ever win another match again and would wind up selling meat out of a truck in Moscow right?

In the height of the “Where’s Punk” spring, Paul Heyman came out to Punk’s music in Chicago and sat down in the middle of the ring. The fans were begging to see Punk, but within a few minutes, Heyman had them thinking about the Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania. It took a master to get them off that topic but he was able to do it in a matter of minutes. That’s pure talent and only Heyman could have pulled it off.

Speaking of Heyman, he might have topped himself a month later in New Orleans. The previous night he had led Brock Lesnar to victory over the Undertaker, doing the unthinkable of breaking the Streak. This was evil winning and getting to give the mother of all victory speeches. Heyman talking about how Lesnar was here to put tears in children’s eyes was glorious and bragging about Undertaker collapsing and going to the hospital in a “shoot” is about as evil as you’ll ever find. He capped it off by talking about how Lesnar is the one to do everything he says he’s done and now he’s the 1 in 21-1. “So many people have come up and says “I could have broken the Streak.” “WELL WHY DIDN’T YOU???”

The night wasn’t done yet because the Ultimate Warrior came out and gave literally the final promo of his life, talking about how his spirit will live forever and how one day every man breathes his last breath. And then he DIED. There is no way you can ever top that drama, no matter what you do.

We have to get Daniel Bryan in here and we’ll go to Memphis to do it. Bryan wanted a shot at the title at Wrestlemania and was willing to do whatever he had to do to get it. His idea was to hijack the show by having about 100 fans in Bryan shirts take over the ring until HHH agreed to a match with Bryan at Wrestlemania, as well as a spot in the WWE Title match if he won. He kept pushing and pushing until HHH finally snapped and gave Bryan everything he wanted. This set the stage for Wrestlemania and gave the fans everything they wanted all in one great package.

But this one topped them all.

On April 6, 2014 in the New Orleans SUPERdome, Hulk Hogan was in the ring to open Wrestlemania XXX as the official host. He talked about how there are Wrestlemania moments and you never know when one is going to happen. And then the glass shattered.

I’ve been to a lot wrestling shows over the years. I’ve seen a LOT of wrestling over the years. I’ve seen almost everything there is to see in wrestling and am a very jaded fan as a result. When that glass shattered though, my heart skipped a beat and my jaw actually fell open. The pop was incredible and they somehow topped it when the Rock came out a few minutes later. The three biggest stars in the history of wrestling standing in the ring together for the first and only time ever.

There’s a famous photo of Elvis Pressley, Jerry Lee Lewis and Johnny Cash (plus Carl Perkins) at Sun Studios in Memphis called the Million Dollar Quartet. That shot of Austin, Hogan and Rock together could be called the Billion Dollar Trio and there will never be a better collection of talent in one place.

Remember this one from last year?

Ok so just like last year, it’s going to Paul Heyman but I’ll go over some of the honorable mentions.

Lana was just ok this year as her main line continued to be SHUT UP. That being said, I’d much rather look at her in a short skirt than almost anyone else on the list so she gets a few points.

Dario Cueto is good but I need to see more of him.

The only other option was the Authority. They nailed their roles perfectly and I didn’t mind Stephanie in tight dresses or the short skirt at Wrestlemania. What I did mind however was the return of the twenty minute opening promos. Seriously, cut those out.

That being said, Heyman’s promos this year never stopped being good and the one from the Raw after Wrestlemania is as perfect of a heel promo as I’ve ever heard.

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 15, 2014
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

TLC was last night and it didn’t quite live up to the standard set by R-Evolution. By “didn’t quite” I of course mean not in the slightest as it was mainly a bunch of matches with different weapons swapped in without much changing. Hopefully Lesnar is back tonight to finally get the main stories moving forward. Jericho is the guest host as well so let’s get to it.

We immediately open with Jericho’s countdown and the guest GM is here. He’s happy to be in Detroit rock city because he’s in charge tonight. Tonight is all about the fans because last week they gave him a Slammy for diving off the top of a cage. Jericho stops for another Y2J chant but says he’ll get in trouble if he doesn’t move this along. Last week Fandango accepted his award for him and that’s not cool with the boss. Therefore, he demands that Fandumbo get out here right now and bring the trophy with him.

Instead he gets Paul Heyman with a mic in hand. He’s used to being the power in the arena, but tonight is Raw Is Jericho. If you’re going to have a guest GM, why not have someone known for running the most exciting promotion of all time? However, that’s not why Heyman is here tonight. He isn’t cool with the idea of Jericho winning the Extreme Moment of the Year because he’s kind of the extreme guy around here.

Jericho calls him a walrus and says that Heyman owes him $200 from selling a Best of Jericho tape in ECW. He gets in Heyman’s face but Paul says he’s an advocate. Therefore, he’s here to talk about Seth Rollins, who had a chance to knock Cena out of the Royal Rumble spot last night. Cue Rollins as Jericho looks interested in where this is going.

Seth gets right in Heyman’s face but Paul literally backs down as Rollins talks about putting Cena through a table and having his hand raised. That victory was taken away though, just like at Survivor Series. The Authority would still be in power if not for the vigilante Sting. Last night it was Roman Reigns costing him the match, which everyone knows he won. Everyone knows Cena can’t beat him on his own (Stooges applaud) because Cena is a coward. Rollins issues a challenge for a rematch when he’s healthy enough, but here’s John to cut him off.

Cena tells Rollins to shut up and let the adults talk. Just because Seth has a mic in his hands it doesn’t mean he has anything in his pants. Last night they had a match and Rollins lost, but now he’s out here running his mouth. That means Rollins hasn’t learned to be a man, because he hasn’t learned to dust himself off and continue to fight. Cena turns to Heyman and starts talking about fighting the Beast at the Royal Rumble in a great fight.

Back to Rollins, Cena says he’s wanting a fight tonight. Rollins mentioned a rematch and Cena had the same thing in mind. Tonight Cena needs help because he can’t make matches. Therefore, he needs someone with the power to make that match happen. The look on Jericho’s face is hilarious here as you can see the lightbulb go off over his head. Jericho of course makes the match and puts it in a steel cage, which just happens to be hanging above the ring.

Cena leaves and Rollins calls Jericho the worst GM of all time. “You’re worse than that stupid computer!” He says Jericho is jealous because he’s not as important as Rollins. Jericho is out of shape and couldn’t even beat the popcorn guy. “Well of course I couldn’t because the popcorn guy is a ninja.” Jericho thinks he can beat Heyman though and Paul readily agrees. Chris isn’t convinced though and makes himself vs. Heyman for tonight. We’re STILL not done yet though because Jericho tells us to vote on the App for the stipulations in his match with Heyman.

Your choices for Jericho vs. Heyman: Extreme Rules, No Holds Barred or Street Fight.

Erick Rowan/Dolph Ziggler vs. Big Show/Luke Harper

Ziggler has to run away from Big Show to start but eventually gets thrown into the corner. Some right hands and a dropkick stagger Show but he just tosses Ziggler down with ease. A hard shoulder sends Ziggler out to the floor and he barely beats the ten count back in as we take our second break in seven minutes.

Back with Harper nailing Dolph in the jaw for two. Off to Big Show for his slow motion offense as we get a split screen still package of the ladder match last night. Harper catapults him throat first into the bottom rope for two but misses a charge into the post. The hot tag brings in Rowan to clean house as everything breaks down. Harper and Ziggler go over the announcers’ table and Big Show KO’s Rowan for the pin at 10:02.

Rating: C-. They’re trolling us right? I mean, they can’t seriously think this is the best possible option. I’m assuming this is to set up Big Show vs. someone later on and I’m sure that BIG SHOW of all people needs some wins like this to set up his push. You know, because all those titles over the years are just forgotten right? I can’t get over this and it’s making me lose my sanity more every week.

I mean, why bother even setting Rowan up as a monster with a new character in the first place? They made a target and destroyed it in the span of like a month and for what? To make Big Show stronger? You would thinking knocking JOHN CENA and Mark Henry cold would have proven it, but no that’s not enough. Instead they need to tease the fans with Rowan and then have him get beaten down twice in two days. You know, for Big Show!

Jericho tells Fandango to shut up in the back and go to the ring.

Video on TLC last night.

New Day isn’t afraid of the Dusts’ darkness. Soon, you’ll feel their power. Big E. freaks out so much that he sweats on everyone.

Bella Twins vs. Alicia Fox/Natalya

Total Divas match. Fox hammers on Nikki to start but eats a spinebuster. We’re already in the chinlock for a bit before Brie comes in for one of her own. A jawbreaker sets up the cold tag to Natalya and Brie slaps her in the face, earning her a Sharpshooter for the submission at 2:13.

Tyson checks on Nikki for some reason until Natalya sees him.

Roman Reigns will be in action tomorrow night on Super Smackdown Live.

It’s the Highlight Reel with guests Lana and Rusev. Lana immediately brags about Rusev still being undefeated by crushing Swagger again before allowing Chris to ask any intelligent questions he has. Jericho mocks Lana for wearing the same outfit on TV twice in a row before asking if it’s the tight bun hairstyle that makes her so angry all the time. Maybe Rusev needs to release some of his stress by showing Lana his Sputnik.

Jericho thinks there’s something going on between the two of them and starts singing about them in a tree together. “It’s the US Champ and the communist tramp!” Lana freaks out until Rusev takes the mic. Maybe he should just crush Jericho right now. Jericho tries to figure out why someone always wants to beat him up. Speaking of which, there’s someone that wants to fight Rusev right now. Cue Ryback for an actually fresh feud but Rusev backs down, as is his custom.

We look at Big Show interfering in the tables match last night but getting taken out by the returning Roman Reigns.

Ascension is coming.

Goldust/Stardust vs. New Day

Big E./Woods here as Kofi jumps in on commentary. Xavier drops Goldust with a dropkick and legsweep before it’s off to Big E. for a Vader Clothesline. Goldie bails to the floor for a breather and it’s Stardust in. The commentators talk about E.’s sweating as he hits a pair of backbreakers on Stardust. Back to Woods for a quick arm wringer before Big E. comes in with a slam. Big E. drops Woods onto Stardust for two before Woods sends both Dusts to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Goldust tagging himself in to snap Big E.’s throat across the top rope. Stardust does the same and we hit a chinlock from Goldust. E. charges into a spinebuster for two and the CM Punk chant begins. The match keeps dragging on so the fans chant for NXT. The Dusts take turns with various kinds of locks before Stardust kicks Big E. in the face. E., presumably out of boredom, takes Stardust’s head off with a clothesline.

The hot tag brings in Woods for his rolling clothesline but he walks into a Goldust powerslam for two. An enziguri knocks Stardust to the floor and E. offers himself as a launch pad for a flip dive onto both Dusts. The Midnight Hour FINALLY ends Goldust at 13:33. Kofi’s wild celebration for the pin helped.

Rating: D+. It’s not even that the match was bad but it felt like it went on for about four hours. This is what I mean when I talk about them stretching something out to fill in time, because they don’t have enough material to fill in three hours. You would think a twenty three minute opening segment would eat up enough time that this isn’t necessary, but somehow it’s still happening almost every week.

Miz (with Mizdow) isn’t worried about facing Jimmy Uso on his own tonight. The only way Jimmy will ever be on a red carpet is if he’s with his wife. Jimmy’s story ends tonight.

Adam Rose is in the back and promises the Rosebuds the biggest after party ever tonight. Kane pops up, says he doesn’t like Rose, and says he’s Adam’s opponent tonight.

Adam Rose vs. Kane

Kane quickly throws Rose to the floor where the Bunny plays cheerleader. Back in and Rose runs away from Kane until he nails a clothesline in the corner. Rose stops to dance though and eats a big boot, but the Bunny comes in off the top, only to dive into a double chokeslam for the pin at 1:32. Side note: Jimmy Jacobs was part of the Rosebuds.

The Bunny gets tombstoned.

We look back at the opening segment.

Chris Jericho vs. Paul Heyman

Heyman comes out wearing workout gear and carrying a mic. He knows Jericho is expecting a bunch of tricks up his sleeve but Heyman doesn’t have anything. Heyman doesn’t even have a witty comeback like “I’m the Jew in ju-jitsu.” Instead he wants to keep this PG because he gave Jericho his first break. Now Jericho is a world famous star who wants to fight Heyman over $200 from nearly twenty years ago. Paul offers him the $200 in lieu of a horrible beating and busts out the checkbook. Jericho slaps it out of his hand and shows us the results:

Extreme Rules – 39%

No Holds Barred – 18%

Street Fight – 43%

Heyman doesn’t understand why Jericho thinks it’s fair to get into a fight with…..BROCK LESNAR. Cue the champ (no belt) as reality sets in on Jericho. He gets in the ring and stares Jericho down but Jericho tries a Codebreaker. Brock just stands there and lets Jericho fall before planting him with the F5. The fans chant for Cena but Lesnar just leaves without a match ever taking place.

Here are Fandango and Rosa with Jericho’s Slammy. Before he can say much though, here’s Roman Reigns to interrupt. A big right hand and the spear drop the dancer and Reigns smirks a bit. Now it’s Big Show’s turn to cut Reigns off but Roman says if Big Show gets in the ring, he’ll get hit in the mouth. Reigns is a step ahead of him as the Superman Punch knocks Show off the apron but not out. He throws some stairs around and that’s that.

Miz vs. Jimmy Uso

The fans want Mizdow but get Miz running out to the floor. Back in and a slam drops Miz as Naomi is watching backstage. Some chops have Miz in even more trouble and Jimmy just pounds away with right hands. Miz finally snaps Jimmy’s throat across the top rope and goes up, only to dive into an uppercut. They head outside with Mizdow ramming Jimmy’s back into the apron before putting on what looks to be the Last Chancery of all things back inside.

The Reality Check gets two but Jimmy fights up and knocks Miz to the floor for a big dive. Mizdow of course falls down as well because he’s dedicated to his craft. Back in again and a high cross body gets two for Jimmy. He easily breaks up the Figure Four and hits a Samoan drop, only to have Mizdow come in and dive into the corner as well. Jimmy throws him to the floor, gets a quick assist from Jey, and hits the superkick and Superfly Splash for the pin at 6:15.

Rating: C-. You know, Miz can actually have a decent match when he gets away from the Figure Four stuff. Jimmy winning here makes the most sense given the story, even though Naomi has wound up meaning nothing in this entire story other than setting it up, making her one of the first Maguffins in WWE history.

Post break Naomi is walking in the back when Miz comes up to offer her a spot on MizTV tomorrow night. As usual, Naomi looks unsure.

Rollins says his issues with Cena are getting ridiculous. He has to step inside a cage with Cena again tonight because the Authority is gone and everything is crazy. Jericho wouldn’t be here tonight running his mouth and then winding up in a hospital if the Authority was around and Rollins is going to teach Cena a lesson tonight.

The cage is lowered.

Seth Rollins vs. John Cena

In a cage of course with pins, submissions or escape. Rollins charges up the cage wall to start but John pulls him back down. The LOUD dueling Cena chants begin as Rollins drives him face first into the cage for two. Cena comes right back by catapulting him into the cage but Seth catches himself and climbs, only to be pulled back down onto the top rope.

A big bulldog drives Seth down for two and John climbs, only to have Mercury run interference. Rollins stops him from getting out the door and almost gets out himself but Cena powers him back in. Back up and they go up the corner, only to have Rollins sunset flip into a running buckle bomb for two as we take a break.

Back with Cena fighting back and knocking Mercury off the cage. The AA gets a very close two and Cena is stunned. He knocks Noble off the door and goes up top, only to have to fight out of a superplex attempt. Rollins gets knocked off the top and the Fameasser gets two. Another AA attempt is countered and the top rope knee to the face gets two for Rollins. Seth shouts that this is what Cena wanted and rams him face first into the cage. John does the same to him and both guys are down.

It’s Cena up first but Mercury slams the door on his head for two more. The Curb Stomp misses and the STF goes on but he crawls over to the door. Cena has to pull him back in but the Stooges pulls the other way. John wins but Noble throws in the briefcase. Rollins doesn’t need it though as he enziguris Cena down but Seth comes up limping. A briefcase shot is countered with a hard clothesline and both guys are down again.

Another AA is countered and the briefcase shot gets two. Seth climbs up and gets over the top but Cena catches him by the hair. A top rope AA is enough for….not a cover actually. Instead here’s Lesnar with both guys down as Cole actually points out that Lesnar has business with Rollins after what happened at Night of Champions. Brock rolls Germans on Cena and plants him with an F5 as Rollins gets up. Heyman gets in and hands Brock the belt before offering Rollins his hand. Seth shakes it and we might have a new Paul Heyman guy. Rollins nails the Curb Stomp, collects his briefcase, and walks out for the win at 23:33.

Rating: B. This was far more about storytelling than anything else but that’s exactly the right ending. See, this was a way to make Cena look good but protect Rollins at the same time. I was worried they would have Cena win and then do the Lesnar stuff, but out of all this, Cena doesn’t lose face because of the interference and Rollins beats Cena in an entertaining match. What more can you ask for?

The announcers aren’t sure if Heyman and Rollins were working together all along or if they just have common enemies.

Overall Rating: D+. The show showed some signs of getting better, but there’s still so much stuff dragging this show down. I can dig Reigns having his first major win over Big Show, but there is zero reason to build Rowan up just to have him get knocked out twice in a row to prove whatever point they’re going for. Send Swagger out there if you have to, as Rusev has already destroyed him to the point where it’s going to take time to salvage him. Or, just a thought here, IT’S FREAKING BIG SHOW AND HE DOESN’T NEED TO BE BUILT UP BY KNOCKING PEOPLE OUT!

The good thing here though is the future looks better. Cena looks like he has a good chance of beating Lesnar to set up the FAR more interesting Cena vs. Reigns title match at Wrestlemania. Ryback vs. Rusev has a lot more potential than Rusev squashing people that have no chance of beating him. I’m digging a lot of what’s going on in WWE right now, but there are just so many stupid decisions dragging them down.

Results

Big Show/Luke Harper b. Dolph Ziggler/Erick Rowan – KO Punch to Rowan

Natalya/Alicia Fox b. Bella Twins – Sharpshooter to Brie

New Day b. Goldust/Stardust – Midnight Hour to Goldust

Kane b. Adam Rose – Chokeslam

Jimmy Uso b. Miz – Superfly Splash

Seth Rollins b. John Cena – Rollins escaped the cage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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This week’s episode of Raw was the final push to the Night of Champions PPV, meaning the whole show was really about one thing because that’s all this pay per view is going to be about. The interesting thing about this show was the structure which we’ll focus on as a whole later on. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the big story of the week as Heyman came to the ring but Cena showed up, ready to fight Brock Lesnar. This led to Cena promising to back up his threat from last week, giving Heyman “until halftime” to produce Lesnar. Later in the show, Cena would lock Heyman in a room with Great Khali standing guard.

This was the interesting structure that I was talking about: when Cena said halftime, he meant halftime of the Monday Night Football game. Eventually, right around halftime of the game, Cena brought Heyman out and threatened to beat the tar out of him unless Lesnar showed up. Heyman bought time by saying that he had wanted Cena to be violent and aggressive, which could make him a Paul Heyman Guy. He begged Cena to embrace the hate one time and finally got Cena to shove him by talking about Cena’s mom.

Lesnar came out immediately and circled the ring before actually getting in and suplexing Cena out to the floor. John got back in and had a fight with Lesnar, actually getting the better of him on the floor. This was intense, violent and exactly what the match on Sunday needed. It made me believe that Cena could win the match, even though I don’t think there’s a real chance of him getting the belt back, at least not yet.

Putting this on during halftime of the football game was the right idea, as WWE could have Hulk Hoga vs. Undertaker vs. Cena vs. Austin vs. Rock in a first blood Hell in a Cell Iron Man match and not beat Monday Night Football. Why would WWE try to win a fight where they have no chance? Instead they made sure to get the biggest audience possible which was a good idea in theory, even though it doesn’t seem to have played out that well in the numbers. That being said, I like that they’re actually trying something different instead of doing the same stupid stuff over and over again.

We’ll jump back to the stuff in between the opening and the showdown. The first match saw Jericho beat Kane in a nothing match after sending him face first into an exposed turnbuckle. Kane is worthless at this point and I have no interest in seeing him do anything on TV anymore. MAYBE have him talk but leave the wrestling to people that can still move. Jericho wasn’t much better either and thankfully he’s wrapping up his run this Sunday.

Roman Reigns promises to end Rollins tonight.

Jack Swagger made Bo Dallas tap out. Nothing to see here but you would think this might have been the pre-show match on Sunday.

Paige and Nikki Bella beat Brie Bella and AJ with Nikki destroying Brie for most of the match. This was just a way for the sisters to argue post match and Paige and AJ to do their “mind games”, whatever they’re supposed to be.

Bray did his stuff about Big Show before Show beat him by DQ. Wyatt got to show off a bit but Harper ran in for the save. This was another waste of Bray but at least it wasn’t a clean pin. I have a bad feeling we’re setting up yet another Big Show push that no one wants to see and a match that he has no chance of winning. I mean, Lesnar beat him in just over two minutes at the Royal Rumble. How can WWE believe that’s something worth headlining another show?

Sheamus and the Usos beat Cesaro and the Dusts in your standard “take two feuds and call me in the morning” match. There isn’t much to talk about with this one but it wasn’t bad.

Orton promises to give Jerichot he beating of his life on Sunday. That would be the third or fourth time he’s done so.

Naomi beat Cameron after Cameron tried to cover Naomi when her face was on the mat. I really hope it’s character schtick but I have a bad feeling it isn’t. Just let Naomi be the athletic freak of the division like she should be instead of making her do this Total Divas nonsense.

Dolph Ziggler and R-Truth beat the Miz and Damien Sandow in the same match they had on Smackdown, minus most of the comedy and with Miz taking the fall instead of Sandow.

Rollins pretended to be a neanderthal like Reigns.

Reigns then beat Rollins in a good match that is going to happen again on Sunday. Why that’s the case is beyond me but WWE hasn’t made a ton of sense in a few weeks now.

The big closing segment was Mark Henry rallying America before his match with Rusev on Sunday. Again I’m assuming this is their way of giving up the night to the NFL, but they could have had Reigns vs. Rollins close the show instead of this. The viewership plummeted for this segment and I can’t imagine anyone was surprised.

Raw this week had the same problems it’s had for a long time now: there’s clearly no effort other than with Cena vs. Lesnar. Not that that wrestlers aren’t trying, but they’re being given nothing to work with. Everything feels meaningless coming into Sunday outside of the main event and that’s not good. This is the annual fall lull and it really doesn’t make me care about the product. There’s a house show this weekend five minutes from my house and a main event of Cena vs. Kane isn’t enough to make me go. The show was watchable but nothing I’m going to remember by Friday.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2014
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Night of Champions and the World Champion is in the building. Last week a fired up John Cena called out Lesnar to appear here tonight, threatening Paul Heyman with violence if Brock didn’t show up. It should be interesting to see Cena get his hands on Lesnar to put a seed of doubt in Brock for Sunday. Let’s get to it.

We open with Heyman in the ring for his weekly address. He talks about Cena coming to the ring (complete with singing Cena’s music) and waving to the fans before Brock comes out to kill. Cena cuts Paul off before he can get much further and has the black shorts on so you know he’s serious. John asks where Brock is and Heyman starts panicking. If Brock isn’t here then Heyman is taking Lesnar’s beating.

Heyman gets some cheap pops from the crowd and talks a lot, seemingly stalling for time. He points to the entrance and Cena is ready but Heyman starts laughing. Brock flies on a private plane because he doesn’t like anyone and the plane is delayed. He’ll be here tonight but not until later. Heyman thinks Cena knew Brock was late though because he knows what’s coming when Lesnar arrives.

Paul applauds Cena for being a hero and tries to leave but John grabs him by the neck. Cena doesn’t buy what Heyman said and give Heyman until the show is half done to produce Lesnar. Heyman goes to leave but Cena cuts him off because he doesn’t trust Paul. He’s guaranteed these people a fight and grabs Heyman in a headlock to drag him to the back.

We look back at the Authority beating down Reigns to end last week’s show.

After a break we see Cena taking Heyman into his dressing room and having Great Khali guard the door.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho quickly low bridges Kane to the floor and nails a big dive. Kane pops up and uppercuts Jericho down before sending him into the steps. Back in and Jericho gets two off an enziguri and slaps on a cravate. That’s fine with Kane who sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Jericho hitting a middle rope missile dropkick but not being able to follow up. Kane knocks him right back down and puts on another chinlock. The sideslam gets two on Jericho but he dropkicks Kane out of midair on the clothesline attempt.

There’s a top rope ax handle to put the big man in trouble. Jericho hammers away in the corner and gets two off a high cross body. A turnbuckle pad was pulled off somewhere in there. The Walls are easily countered but Jericho bulldogs him down. Kane blocks the Lionsault with a chokeslam attempt but Jericho sends him face first into the exposed buckle for the pin at 13:20.

Rating: D+. Kane is just slow at this point and it’s getting to be a major problem. He isn’t terrible yet but that seems to be the way its trending. There’s only so much you can do when age catches up with you and unfortunately Kane’s in ring abilities aren’t going to be enough to make up for the change.

Heyman tries to call Lesnar.

We look back at Rusev attacking Henry on Smackdown. Some Olympians wish Henry luck in rallying America tonight.

Roman Reigns looks at Rollins turning on him a few months back and says this ends tonight.

Jack Swagger vs. Bo Dallas

Jack drives him into the corner to start but Bo fights back with right hands. Dallas takes him down and puts on a chinlock as the fans aren’t sure what they want to chant. Jack fights up and is put right back in the chinlock. Another attempt at a comeback with a belly to back suplex works but Bo gets two more off a neckbreaker. Dallas misses a middle rope knee drop and Jack makes his real comeback with shoulders in the corner. The Vader Bomb doesn’t get to launch as Dallas rolls to the apron and snaps Jack’s neck across the top rope. Jack rolls through a sunset flip and puts on the Patriot Lock for the submission at 6:00.

Rating: C-. This was an interesting match and I’m surprised Swagger won clean. Bo tapping out is a questionable choice but his gimmick should be fine as he just has to ignore what happened and keep coming back with the same stuff over and over again. It looks like his major push is over though.

The announcers hype up the Network’s schedule for the week.

We look back at the Springer segment from last week.

Nikki Bella/Paige vs. Brie Bella/AJ Lee

Brie’s new music starts off with the words Brie Mode. So she’s going to be drunk and dance a lot? Nikki starts with her sister but tags out before there’s any contact like a heel should. Paige drives knees into Brie’s ribs to take over and mocks AJ for not being able to make a tag. Brie gets in a quick rollup for two so Paige headbutts her down. A jawbreaker almost allows the hot tag but Nikki takes AJ down. The Rampaige pins Brie at 2:58.

Post match Nikki lays her sister out while the other girls have a skip off.

We look at Big Show stopping Bray Wyatt from making it to the ring on Smackdown.

Bray talks about David slaying Goliath but the giant still lives today in the form of misery and sorrow. Bray has been left with the burden of having to fix everything. He’ll fix the Big Show. Follow the Buzzards.

Heyman tries to leave because he can’t get cell reception. Khali takes the phone and breaks it before throwing Heyman back inside. He picks up the phone and tries to call someone to no avail. This was a waste of time.

Bray Wyatt vs. Big Show

Wyatt hammers away to start but Show shoves him into the corner. The chop is loaded up but Bray shoves him off, only to make Show chop him even harder. Bray hits some corner splashes and stops himself before charging into Show’s boot. A kind of jawbreaker to the ankle and a clothesline have Big Show in trouble. Bray DDTs him for two and we hit the chinlock to slow things down. Show suplexes him way out and nails some clotheslines but Bray hits his cross body for two. Rowan gets on the apron but Bray is whipped into his minion. Big Show nails the Final Cut on Bray but Harper runs in for the DQ at 4:49.

Rating: D+. That could have been far worse. Bray losing by DQ is far better than him losing via pinfall for the sake of the annual “build up Big Show for a match he has no chance of winning” title shot and there was a legitimate chance he could have kicked out anyway. In theory this could be a match on Sunday as I don’t think either guy has anything to do at the moment.

Show chokeslams Harper and Rowan post match, making Bray laugh.

Cesaro/Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos/Sheamus

That’s quite the odd heel partnership. Sheamus and Goldust get things going with the threat of a Brogue Kick sending Goldust out to the floor. Stardust goes to check on him and meows for…..luck I guess? Back in and Jey comes off the top to go after the arm but Goldust drives him into the corner for a tag to Stardust. Cesaro grabs Jey from the apron for ten forearms to the chest.

Jey shrugs it off and tags in Jimmy to clean house with a Samoan drop to Goldust. Off to Stardust with a shot to the head for two before throwing Jimmy to the floor. Back from a break with Cesaro dancing a jig and getting two off a double stomp to Jimmy. A gutwrench suplex puts Jimmy down and it’s off to Stardust for some shots in the corner. Back to Cesaro who poses a lot and puts on a front facelock.

Jimmy powers out and makes the hot tag to Sheamus who immediately cleans house. Cesaro gets caught in a series of forearms to the chest but Stardust makes the save with a rollup. Sheamus knocks both of them to the floor and hits the battering ram off the top. Back in and Sheamus Brogue Kicks Stardust but walks into the Neutralizer. Jimmy makes a last second save and superkicks Cesaro down, setting up the Superfly Splash from Jey for the pin at 13:10.

Rating: C. Nice six man here and there’s nothing wrong with putting two feuds together into a single match. I’m not wild on Cesaro taking a fall but they back themselves into a corner with the booking here. There wasn’t a good way to end the match with a pin but at least the action before the pin was good.

We look at Ambrose being put out of action last month.

Orton says he had to attack Jericho last week because Jericho said Orton has been handed everything in WWE. This Sunday, Jericho gets the beating of his life.

Cena thanks Khali and drags Heyman to the ring. He says produce the beast or be ready to lose your teeth. Heyman starts talking and says this is the beast that he’s been trying to drag out of Cena but he knows Cena won’t be ready on Sunday. Paul has been trying to get Cena to become the beast that can stop the beast of Brock but Cena just can’t do it because of his inner code. Heyman says Cena can’t be a bully because Cena can’t even punch him in the face when Heyman deserves it. That means Cena will never be champion again because he can’t beat Brock Lesnar.

John takes the mic from him and says if there was a human being that deserves to have his face rearranged, it’s Heyman. Paul says do it and become a Paul Heyman Guy but Cena still won’t do it. Cena is about to leave but Paul plays his ace and says Cena’s mother raised a son with some testicular fortitude. That’s enough for Cena as he shoves Heyman to the floor…..and here’s Brock.

Cena is all fired up and wants a piece but Lesnar calmly walks around the ring. He takes the belt off but just puts it over his shoulder. They start walking off but Brock hands the title to Heyman. Cena says let’s go and Brock walks to the ring and gets on the apron. He actually gets in and the fight is on. Brock puts Cena down with a release German suplex and kicks him to the floor with ease. John gets up and knocks Brock to the floor. Brock is sent into the apron and barricade before they fight on the ground. Lesnar covers up until security drags them apart. The champion leaves and might have a busted up nose.

Cameron vs. Naomi

This is based on something that happened on Total Divas last night, which still happened at least two months ago as Daniel Bryan’s neck surgery was announced on the same episode. Naomi gets tired of waiting on Cameron to look in her mirror and goes after her, only to be sent to the floor when trying her stupid hip shake headscissors. Cameron gets two (after trying to cover Naomi with her face down) off a snap suplex before cranking on Naomi’s arms. Back up and Naomi grabs a sunset flip before putting on a freaky looking leg choke for the submission at 4:32.

Rating: D. The bad is almost all on Naomi here as she can’t eve cover someone right. Do you have any idea how hard it is to not be able to cover someone the right way? Kamala used to do that with the gimmick of being a savage that didn’t know what he was doing. The problem is Cameron is supposed to be a competent wrestler and looks that dumb in the process.

Yeah it might be character, but when her development is on Total Divas and consists of dancing, looking at a camera and talking about “chingle chingle” (the scene where Bryan tries to have a conversation with her is hysterical), it’s hard to buy it as being put on. Naomi was trying here and has something with that choke though.

Dolph Ziggler/R-Ziggler vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

They did this on Smackdown already as R-Truth is playing Dolph’s stunt double, down to the same gear and moveset. The joke though is no one can tell them apart (JBL: “Like the Beverly Brothers!” Old school fans will get why that’s funny) and the announcers play it seriously. Ziggler works on Sandow to start before it’s off to Truth for stereo elbows.

Truth gets taken down by Miz and it’s off to Mizdow as the announcers can’t tell them apart either. Truth finally escapes Miz and makes the diving tag to Ziggler. Miz gets two off a quick rollup but gets caught in the Fameasser for two. Everything breaks down and Miz hits his partner, allowing Dolph to hit the Zig Zag for the pin at 5:08. Oddly enough Lawler was cheering for Miz and Mizdow.

Rating: D. This is another reason why I regret watching Smackdown. Not only did they do this EXACT SAME JOKE over there, but the idea was fresher and better because it was the first time. It also helped that Sandow took the pin instead of Miz, meaning it didn’t affect the title match on Sunday. I’m hoping Miz wins the title as I’m liking this Hollywood star character.

Rollins won’t take anything away from Reigns but Roman is nothing without him. He calls Reigns a neanderthal and imitates Roman walking on his knuckles like a gorilla. Reigns is part gorilla, part Samoan and part rhinoceros. A rhinoceros is one of the most powerful animals in the world but they’re not that smart. Tonight Rollins is going to show Reigns why he led the Shield.

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Don’t these two already have a match at Night of Champions? Seth speeds things up to start and snaps Roman’s throat across the top rope. A hard clothesline sends Rollins running to the floor but Roman catches him trying to come back in and sends him face first onto the concrete. Back in and another shot puts Rollins on the floor as Reigns is dominating. Rollins is thrown over the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Reigns missing the Apron Kick and getting caught by a suicide dive into the barricade.

Reigns quickly fights back and nails him in the face before hitting the Apron Kick. The Superman Punch looks to set up the spear but Seth leapfrogs him and nails a low superkick for two. Back up and Seth tries what looks like a Pedigree off the top but gets countered into a slow motion backdrop, only to have Rollins catch him in an impressive running buckle bomb across the ring for two more. Reigns gets back up, ducks a charge and hits the spear for the pin at 11:23.

Rating: B-. The match was good but why in the world do you have this match in full with a clean ending before they have the same match six days later? That’s some very odd booking and a sign that they don’t have enough people to fill in a three hour show every week. This is even worse when you consider how many people they have on the roster but how few they put any effort into.

We recap Cena vs. Lesnar as 11pm passes.

It’s time for Henry to rally America before his match on Sunday. He talks about having a second chance to represent the United States after he was injured at the Olympics. For all the fans waving the American flag, he can’t let you down. Henry says Lana couldn’t make all her statements without living in America, so here are Lana and Rusev to cut him off. Lana says American intelligence is dropping faster than President Obama’s approval ratings.

She brings up Henry competing in the 1992 Olympic Games but Russia actually won that year. We get a picture of that year’s winner and Lana goes on about how Henry fakes his injury in 1996 to avoid being defeated again. Henry tries the Pledge of Allegiance but Rusev comes in for the brawl. Rusev kicks him down but Henry powers out of the Accolade and chokebombs the Russian. Old Glory is waved to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Very strange choices in the last twenty minutes aside, this was an interesting episode. It seemed like they were trying to book around Monday Night Football as Cena kept using the word halftime when talking about Heyman. I wasn’t looking at the clock, but I would bet that the segment took place during halftime of the football game. If that’s true, it’s one of the smartest things WWE has done in a long time.

WWE cannot contend with the NFL, so don’t try to. Don’t put some big moment at the beginning of the show, because fans are going to pick the football every time due to lesser interest, the ton of recaps and the bunch of other shows you can see the segment on again during the week. By putting it on when there’s no choice to be made, you ensure the far bigger audience is available. That’s actually thinking for a change instead of just ramming your head into a wall and being surprised when the wall doesn’t move.

The ending segment was a very odd choice, but I’d assume it’s the same mentality: why try to fight the NFL with a big segment when it’s going to be wasted? As I’m writing this, the game is a tie in the fourth quarter so it looks like WWE is playing it smart. The show was good overall and I’m liking some of the stuff I’m seeing anymore. I’m still leaning towards Lesnar on Sunday, but there’s actual doubt there now and that was the goal of this show. Good stuff tonight with a lot of the dumb being cut out and replaced with entertainment.

Results

Chris Jericho b. Kane – Rollup

Jack Swagger b. Bo Dallas – Patriot Lock

Nikki Bella/Paige b. Brie Bella/AJ Lee – Rampaige to Brie

Big Show b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when Luke Harper interfered

Sheamus/Usos b. Stardust/Goldust/Cesaro – Superfly Splash to Cesaro

Naomi b. Cameron – Leg choke

Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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