Monday Night Raw
Date: September 30, 2013
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Battleground a mere fifteen days after Night of Champions. If that’s too fast for you, don’t worry because you’ll get another PPV just three weeks after this Sunday. Tonight will probably just firm up stuff for the show on Sunday, but there’s a chance we’ll get new developments in the potential locker room revolt. Let’s get to it.

It’s breast cancer awareness month again, meaning the middle rope is pink and there’s a graphic on the ramp.

Here’s Punk to open things up and we get a clip from Heyman’s scheme last week, leading to Ryback’s beatdown. Punk talks about how things are often unpredictable around here but once in awhile you can guess what’s happening. Take last week for instance: Punk was in his hometown so of course Heyman was going to come after him. Everyone knew Punk would get jumped if he went after Heyman and that’s exactly what happened.

That doesn’t matter though as the story ends with Punk making Axel go to sleep, showing Ryback what happens to bullies, and when Punk gets his hands on Paul Heyman. The story could end at anytime. It could be at Battleground, or it could be right here tonight. Punk isn’t leaving the ring until he gets a fight with one of Heyman’s guys and he gets rid of Heyman for good.

Cue Brad Maddox (Punk: “You don’t even get an entrance song?”) who says this ultimate showdown isn’t best for business. Punk already has his match with Ryback on Sunday so there’s no need to give him another one now. Maddox is willing to give Punk a match here tonight though…..and here’s Big E. Langston for the first time in weeks. Big E. says he’s Punk’s man if Punk wants aggression and the beating is on. Punk is tossed into the corner but he misses a charge into the post and here’s a referee. The bell is after the break.

CM Punk vs. Big E. Langston

Joined in progress with Punk firing off kicks on the floor before sending Langston back inside for a high cross body for one. Big E. escapes the GTS and slams Punk out of the corner for two. A splash to Punk’s back gets the same and it’s off to a half crab from Big E. CM fights up but gets run over by Langston for two more. A nice looking belly to belly suplex puts Punk down again and Langston is getting a little frustrated.

Punk comes back with a high kick for two but gets taken down by a clothesline for the same. A second splash misses though and it’s Punk coming back with his kicks. Langston is taken down with a neckbreaker and there’s the running knee in the corner. There’s the Macho Elbow and the GTS is good for the clean pin at 5:52 shown.

Rating: C. This was decent but just kind of there for the most part. I’m not sure I get the point of bringing Langston back just for a job to Punk, but at least he was in there with a big star instead of having the same match with Ziggler over and over. Langston was kind of lost in the shuffle for the last month and a half so it’s good to at least see him on TV again.

We recap Cody Rhodes being fired.

Kofi Kingston vs. Fandango

Fandango is in a pink shirt, allowing Cole to list off everything he can about the Susan G. Komen Foundation. We also get part of a compilation of 30 Troubles in Paradise from Youtube, because we need to see a Youtube player on screen instead of just showing the video right? Fandango takes Kofi down with a quick suplex and puts on a chinlock as the fans chant overrated. Kofi spins out of a hiptoss and DDTs Fandango down for a breather. Kingston comes back with some double chops but gets sent into the buckle. Fandango goes up but Kofi moves before the legdrop. Trouble in Paradise is good for the pin at 3:02.

Rating: D. Well that happened. The match was only three minutes long and the only move that was interesting at all was the finisher. Fandango has a fun character but he has almost nothing of note in the ring. The long pants still aren’t working for Kofi and if rumors are to be believed, they’re why he isn’t being pushed as hard anymore. Seriously.

Post match here are the Wyatts with Bray sitting on the stage, asking why these things happen to him. He promises to knock everyone down one by one, so follow the buzzards. Creepy as ever.

Ziggler vs. Sandow is the Kickoff match for Sunday.

The Bellas are in the back when Randy Orton (fangirl pop) comes up to offer some sarcastic congratulations to Brie for her engagement to Daniel Bryan. Orton wants to know the date before it needs to be scheduled before Battleground because Daniel won’t be able to make it after then.

Paul Heyman chastises Renee Young for thinking Punk will be taking him out anytime soon. Heyman says Punk was a nobody who because a Paul Heyman guy before becoming WWE Champion but the forgot what made them the best in the world. Renee says that Axel and Ryback can be seen hiding off camera, meaning Heyman must be planning another trap. Heyman says he has a big plan for tonight’s Raw and if Punk wants to do something about it, go ahead and try.

Los Matadores vs. 3MB

It’s Mahal and Slater here. Los Matadores are named Fernando and Diego and their graphic says they have a miniature bull with them named El Torito. After an over the top intro sequence with a bunch of flips and waving of red capes, we start with Diego (Primo) throwing Mahal around and into the corner for a tag off to Slater.

Heath is thrown around and backdropped but he shoves I think Fernando into the corner for some double teaming. A knee drop has Fernando in trouble and we hit a quick chinlock. Fernando comes back with a headscissors and it’s back to Diego to clean house. Everything breaks down and something resembling a double Angle Slam takes out Slater at 3:58.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what to say here. I was laughing for most of the match, but it wasn’t what I would call funny. It’s definitely in the “so over the top it’s ok” category as they’re playing it completely for laughs, but at the end of the day it’s still Epico and Primo which doesn’t help them that much. They have potential as a comedy team but nothing more than that.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to address the Rhodes family face to face. Goldust comes out in a suit while still wearing the facepaint. Stephanie congratulates Cody on the wedding and hopes he got the Bed Bath and Beyond gift card. HHH wants to know why they’re staring at him because this is what, the fourth opportunity the family has gotten? Cody failed, Goldust failed and Dusty made it about himself. Is Dusty still upset about not being able to do anything outside of Florida or the NWA (I’d be shocked if more than 5% of the live crowd understood that)?

Stephanie says Dusty has a very important job by training new superstars down in Orlando, meaning the future is in Dusty’s hands. Tonight though, the family’s future is in Stephanie and HHH’s hands. They’d like to give Cody and Goldust a job if they can beat Rollins and Reigns this Sunday at Battleground. If they lose though, neither of them will ever work for WWE again, including Dusty.

Big Dust grabs the mic and says he’ll be in his boys’ corner. Stephanie says you’re on but Dusty sounds like he wants a fight. The bosses leave and here’s Shield for the brawl. Dusty tries to bring in a chair but gets beaten down as well. Cody takes the TripleBomb and the Shield stands tall.

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Axel pounds away to start but Truth comes back with kicks to the leg. He rains down right hands in the corner, only to be dropped face first onto the buckle to give the champion control again. A nice dropkick from Axel puts Truth down and we hit the chinlock. Truth fights up and hits the suplex into a Stunner for two but misses a dropkick. Before Axel can follow up, Punk’s music hits and the distraction lets Truth hit the Little Jimmy for the pin at 4:20. No Punk.

Rating: D+. Not horrible here but it was all about the false ending which is getting a bit old as a finish to a match. How many times have you seen someone come out for a distraction and the guy getting beaten up badly loses as a result? Truth isn’t horrible or anything but it was pretty obvious he was going to win because he was there as a pawn in the Punk vs. Heyman stuff.

Trish Stratus has had a son. Cool.

Video on Brie Bella and Daniel Bryan, which is an excuse to show clips from Total Divas.

Alicia Fox vs. Brie Bella

Feeling out process to start with Alicia taking over with some choking. The northern lights suplex gets two on Brie as AJ and Tamina are watching in the back. After a quick headscissors from Alicia, Brie comes back with some running kicks and the Bella Buster for the pin at 3:19.

Rating: D+. It’s a Divas match. You do the math here.

Axel is upset but Heyman tells him to calm down. Heyman says Punk is just messing with them but is out of their league. Ryback comes up and says there’s nothing to worry about because they should just give Punk what they want. Heyman tells Ryback to go get something to eat and he’ll come find him in a few minutes. Ryback leaves and Heyman says he sees the world differently since Ryback saved him. Heyman says, and this is a direct quote, that he’s going to go to the ring and propose to Ryback.

We look at Big Show knocking Miz out last week as per Stephanie’s orders.

Big Show, in a suit, says he’s doing ok. We look at a clip from Smackdown with HHH telling Big Show there aren’t many jobs for a guy like him and Big Show nearly knocking HHH out. Show talks about everyone telling him to do the right thing, but that’s easy to say when they’re not in his shoes. How can he pick between his job and his family?

He’s a good person but he has to do evil for the sake of his family. Show rants about having to knock out Dusty Rhodes and now he can’t even look him in the eye. There’s only so much he can take and he’s not going to take it anymore. He’s going to go knock HHH out. Show’s eyes are bugging out and it looks very disturbing.

R-Truth is asking for an Intercontinental Title shot when Big Show comes in and lifts Maddox against the wall, demanding to know where HHH is. Maddox is let down and goes off to find him.

Zack Ryder vs. Alberto Del Rio

Del Rio takes him into the corner before running Ryder over with a shoulder block. Ryder comes back with a clothesline to send Alberto to the floor but misses a plancha to give Del Rio control again. Del Rio pounds away on the floor before heading back inside for a reverse chinlock. There’s the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and it’s back to the chinlock again. Ryder comes back with all of his usual stuff but the Rough Ryder doesn’t connect and Del Rio grabs a German suplex for two. The armbreaker gets the submission at 4:07.

Rating: D+. Yet another match that is long enough to grade but the length brings it down because it feels like they’re just filling in time where they can. This didn’t do anything for Del Rio as he didn’t do anything hardcore before the match on Sunday and everyone beats Ryder anymore. Nothing to see here.

We recap the Rhodes family segment from earlier.

The breast cancer people are recognized.

Here are Ryback and Heyman for the proposal. Heyman says he was man enough to pin Punk at Night of Champions to prove he’s the best in the world, but he’s also an expert in political science. He owns CM Punk, so it was his obligation to squash the rebellion that Punk was starting last week in Chicago. That was getting rid of a dictator which si the right move politically. We get the same clip from earlier of Punk being beaten down by the Heyman guys in case the fans forgot it in the last hour and a half.

Heyman says he’s here because Ryback decided to stand up to the bully that is CM Punk. Ryback says he hates bullies like Punk who took everything Heyman did for him and throw it back in Paul’s face so he had to do something. Heyman talks about how progressive of a society we live in today and he wants more than just a client relationship with Ryback. He wants to make a commitment to Ryback from the opening match to the main event, in sickness and in health and until death do them part.

Paul wants to make an honest man out of Ryback so he takes him by the hand and drops to a knee. Paul’s proposal: will Ryback be the new Paul Heyman guy? Before there’s an answer we get more Punk music and here’s Punk through the crowd. He jumps the barricade….and hurts his knee, collapsing down to the floor in pain. This goes on for awhile until Punk limps to the apron but can’t get in. Heyman goes for it for some stupid reason, allowing Punk to pop up with a kendo stick and lay out Heyman, Ryback and the charging Axel with ease. Axel takes a GTS as Punk hops around to show how good his knee is.

Big Show is still waiting for HHH.

Dolph Ziggler/Usos vs. Shield

On the way to the ring we get another Youtube video to answer the burning question: which Uso is a better dancer? After that greatness, we start with Ziggler getting punched by Ambrose in the corner. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick but a rake to the eyes allows for the tag off to Rollins. The Usos come in with some double teaming and it’s Jimmy hooking an armbar on Seth.

Rollins takes him into the Shield corner and it’s back to Ambrose for some double teaming. Jimmy ducks a double clothesline and tries a double cross body, only to be caught in the air. Jey dropkicks Jimmy’s back to drop both guys down. Everything breaks down and the Usos hit stereo dives to Dean and Roman as we take a break. Back with Seth holding Jimmy in a chinlock. A suplex puts Rollins down but it’s ff to Ambrose before Jimmy can make a tag.

Off to a chinlock from the US Champion as the fans are wanting Ziggler. Roman comes in to complete the trio of chinlockery before something like Cena’s spinning side slam gets two. Jimmy superkicks out of it and FINALLY makes the tag off to Dolph to fire up the crowd. Ziggler loads up the ten straight elbowso n Dean but has to dropkick Rollins out of the air before finishing.

A Fameasser gets two on Ambrose as Reigns makes the Shield save. Jimmy shoves Roman to the floor but Dean breaks up the attempted dive. Off to Rollins as Dean is sent to the floor. Roman makes a blind tag as Dolph Zig Zags Rollins, only to be speared in half for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: B-. Yeah it’s the same formula the Shield has used for months, but there’s nothing wrong with that at all. That spear always looks great and Ziggler went flying as a result this time. Another good match here as everyone has come to expect from Shield. The Usos need to win the tag titles at some point though.

Big Show is still waiting on HHH and even throws some flowers to the floor. Instead he gets cops who don’t like that he’s threatening a WWE employee. Stephanie comes in to say Show is under a lot of pressure and doesn’t understand the consequences of his actions. Stephanie has talked to Show’s wife and implies he can’t perform to her standards as of late if you get Stephanie’s drift. Everyone but Show leaves so Big Show punches a HHH poster.

RVD shows us a Youtube video of his ten most extreme moments. In case you didn’t get it, WWE has a Youtube channel and you need to subscribe to it or your puppy will be lit on fire and your mother will be fed to mutant pigs. Del Rio has no idea what hardcore is about because anything goes. By anything of course they mean chairs to the back, trashcan lids, the steps and a table.

Big Show vs. Shield on Friday.

Santino Marella vs. Antonio Cesaro

Before the match we get the entire giant swing on Titus last week which is still amazing. Cesaro fires off a bunch of elbows to start and stomps on Santino’s chest. A chinlock is quickly broken but Cesaro can’t hook the swing. Santino comes back with his usual stuff before loading up the Cobra. Thankfully Cesaro punches him down and here’s the weekly swing with Santino dropping the stupid sock. The fans are counting the revolutions as they go and we hit an insane 32. Santino stands up but immaturity falls back down, only to roll up Cesaro for the pin at 2:51. Well of course he does.

We look at the marriage announcement between Brie and Bryan again.

Lawler is in the ring to moderate the face to face meeting between Bryan and Orton. Randy talks about how he’s the old Predator again and how dangerous that makes him. He’s genetically superior to the B+ Bryan and will prove it on Sunday. Bryan says that’s A+ all the way from Orton but asks why HHH picked him as the face of the WWE. It’s because he wants Orton to be on magazines and DVDs whereas Bryan would never want to be the best because of something like that.

Orton stops the YES chants before shifting over to Brie Bella. He doesn’t understand what must be wrong with Brie to make her want to be with Bryan, because one day she’ll realize she’s sleeping with a barnyard animal. That’s enough for Bryan and the beating is on. They head to the floor where Orton takes over and sends Bryan into the steps and post. The beating continues and Orton loads up the Elevated DDT on the floor, drawing out Brie to beg for mercy. Orton of course DDTs him on the floor and loads up the announce table. An RKO to Bryan through the table ends the show as Brie freaks out.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked the show a bit more than last week but the WWE Title has gone from the focus of the show to an afterthought. Everything but the world title matches got a great buildup tonight and Battleground looks a lot better as a result. Punk vs. Heyman continues to be probably the feud of the year, the Rhodes and Big Show stuff is well done, and the Shield had another good match. Then there are the world titles though and both matches just feel tacked on. Imagine that: HHH being the focus of two stories and the world titles suffering as a result.

Results

CM Punk b. Big E. Langston – GTS

Kofi Kingston b. Fandango – Trouble in Paradise

Los Matadores b. 3MB – Double falling slam to Slater

R-Truth b. Curtis Axel – Little Jimmy

Brie Bella b. Alicia Fox – Bella Buster

Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder – Cross armbreaker

Shield b. Usos/Dolph Ziggler – Spear to Ziggler

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Smackdown
Date: September 27, 2013
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

The WWE is almost on the verge of a civil war between the HHH regime and a good chunk of the midcard. Daniel Bryan continues to be the one big hope for the good guys but tonight is about Dolph Ziggler as he challenges for Dean Ambrose’s US Title. Other than that we may see some new developments for Battleground which is now just over a week away. Let’s get to it.

Here’s HHH to open things up. He’s been checking social media and doesn’t like seeing terms like favoritism or abuse of power. Sometimes WWE Superstars would rather blame management for their own failures. HHH and Stephanie are fine with that burden because they simply can’t make everyone happy so they do what’s best for business. Then on Raw HHH puts Shield in an 11-3 handicap match, ending with Daniel Bryan pinning Seth Rollins for the final win. HHH continues to talk about how awesome the match was but here’s Miz to interrupt.

Miz doesn’t think there’s much to this idea of being fair but HHH cuts him off by reminding Miz of all the opportunities he’s been given. Miz is the classic example of what HHH was talking about: a superstar who failed but blames someone else. HHH put him in the ring with Randy Orton two weeks ago and here’s a clip of the beatdown Orton gave him in front of Miz’s family.

What HHH doesn’t get is why the beatdown that Randy Orton gave Miz should be on HHH’s head. It’s HHH’s job to protect Miz, even from himself. That’s why Miz only allowed Miz to host MizTV on Raw and he even threw Miz another opportunity by giving him Big Show as a guest. We get a clip of Stephanie telling Big Show to knock him out, which Miz says was ridiculous.

HHH asks Miz what he called Stephanie, with Miz repeating the castrated witch line, but he wishes he could replace the W with a B. Tempers were running high all around on Monday and HHH is sure Stephanie regrets what she said. However, let’s talk about tonight. Miz must be ready to go, so tonight it’s Miz vs. Randy Orton. Maybe HHH should even get in the jet and bring Miz’s parents here to watch another beatdown.

R-Truth vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title of course. Del Rio is very excited over what he did to RVD on Raw and he easily weathers an early Truth attack, only to miss a charge into the post. Truth’s suplex into a Stunner gets two but the ax kick misses, allowing Del Rio to hit the low superkick for the pin at 1:33.

Post match Del Rio goes after Truth even more until RVD makes the save and holds up the title.

In the back Vickie and HHH make the match with Del Rio vs. RVD a hardcore match. HHH’s name for the match: the Battleground Hardcore Rules match. Somehow, that might be more creative than the writing staff.

The Prime Time Players teach some stagehands the Millions of Dollars dance.

Prime Time Players vs. Real Americans

Swagger and Titus get things going with O’Neil kicking both Americans down like they’re not even there. Swagger comes back by taking out the leg before the Americans start some rapid tags. Jack drives Titus into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs before it’s back to Cesaro to stomp him down. Here’s the giant swing on O’Neil for a ridiculous 27 seconds. It’s one thing on a small guy like Santino but to do 22 revolutions on a guy 6’4 and over 260lbs is INSANE. Again, why in the world is Cesaro in this tag team and not fighting for world titles?

Cesaro is too dizzy to stop a tag though and Young starts cleaning house. Cesaro comes right back with a spinning Rock Bottom for two as everything breaks down. Darren gets a rollup for two on Antonio but Swagger gets in a blind tag. Young hits the Gut Check on Cesaro but Swagger comes back in with the Patriot Lock for the submission from Young at 3:45.

Rating: C. Any match with nearly 30 seconds of Titus O’Neil being swung around in a circle makes me it at least passable. The Players are a fine midcard team and Cesaro is awesome but Swagger is just there. He’s such damaged goods at this point that he’s dragging down anyone he works with. Heaven forbid we change anything about him though right? That would just be lunacy.

Bray Wyatt vs. Zack Ryder

Harper and Rowan throw Ryder into the ring but don’t do anything to him other than that. Zack fires off some right hands so Bray just runs him over and drives in shots to Ryder’s back. We actually get a chinlock from Wyatt but Ryder fights up and hits his usual stuff. The Rough Ryder is countered with Ryder being LAUNCHED into the air, followed by Sister Abigail’s Kiss getting the pin at 2:21.

US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler

Kofi and RVD flank Ziggler for protection. Just get to the DQ and six man tag already. Dean takes over with a headbutt and rakes Ziggy’s eyes over the top rope. An elbow drop gets a quick one for the champion but Dolph comes back with punches in the corner and a dropkick. A Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor, triggering a brawl for the DQ at 2:01.

HHH makes the six man.

Shield vs. Dolph Ziggler/Kofi Kingston/Rob Van Dam

The bell rings and we take a break literally a second later. Back with Van Dam firing off kicks to Rollins before driving shoulders in the corner. Rolling Thunder gets two but Rollins gets in a shot to Rob’s bad arm to take over. Off to Dean to crank on the arm but Rob comes back with a spin kick to the face to bring in Ziggler. Dolph snaps off a dropkick and drops five elbows instead of ten. Ambrose pops up and counters the jumping DDT into a snap spinebuster to give Shield control again.

Off to Reigns for a hard clothesline for two before bringing Dean back in to work on the ribs. Reigns comes back in and slams Dolph face first into the mat in a move so simple that it’s awesome. Something like a gutwrench slam has Ziggler in even more trouble but he comes back with a dropkick to put both guys down. Rollins breaks up another hot tag attempt but gets backdropped down, allowing for the real hot tag to Kofi.

Kingston speeds things up and hits the Boom Drop on Ambrose followed by the spinning cross body for two. Ziggler hits the Fameasser on Rollins but gets speared down by Reigns. Rob kicks Reigns down and clotheslines him to the floor for a moonsault from the apron. Kofi hits a springboard clothesline on Ambrose and Trouble in Paradise to Reigns, only to have Rollins hit the running knee to the head to give Dean the pin at 8:13 shown of 11:43.

Rating: B-. Good match for the most part with a very hot finish. Shield certainly still has it for the six man stuff as they went nuts out there with the fast spots for the ending. It’s always more fun when you don’t know who is going to win a match and Shield is great at those false finishes with the last second saves.

Big Show says he can’t sleep at night and is a pariah in his own locker room. He starts crying again when HHH comes in and says maybe Show should just walk away. They really need to read up on what IRON CLAD means. HHH offers to help him find a job as a doorman or baggage handler since Big Show’s size makes him “special.” Big Show holds his fist up at HHH but doesn’t do anything past that.

Cameron vs. AJ Lee

Non-title. Tamina comes out with AJ due to every other Diva being against her (according to AJ in an inset promo). AJ takes Cameron into the corner before hooking a cravate about 30 seconds into the match. Cameron comes back with a quick rollup and a flying leg attack which was supposed to be a cross body for two. AJ sends her to the floor and shouts that Cameron is useless. Tamina takes out an interfering Naomi and the Shining Wizard knocks out Cameron for the pin at 2:41. Still no idea who I’m supposed to cheer for here but Cameron is worthless.

Here’s Heyman to show us a clip of him pinning Punk at the PPV. The fans have disappointed him because they’re surprised he pinned Punk. Heyman trade secret: Punk will lose every time the fans’ blood lust drives him to come after Paul. We look at the Heyman guys destroying Punk on Monday. Heyman thanks everyone for their help on Monday and that includes the fans for driving Punk to do it. Punk is crazy enough to want a match with Ryback at Battleground which will end up with Punk on his back and looking up at the best in the world.

Santino Marella vs. Heath Slater

Santino has Hornswoggle and Great Khali with him. Slater drops Santino with a single right hand to start and we hit the chinlock thirty seconds into the match. Santino comes back with his punches and hiptoss, only to have Slater knee him in the ribs to stop the comeback. As much of a comeback as you can have in the first minute of a match that is.

Slater gets crotched on the top and Santino loads up the Cobra….but Mahal plays a flute to hypnotize the sock. Khali plays a flute of his own to counter but McIntyre takes him down. The Cobra is about to attack Santino when Horny makes the save. Khali plays some more flute, allowing Santino to hit Slater with the Cobra for the pin at 2:58. I’ve watched wrestling for over 25 years and I can honestly say I’ve never seen anything like this.

Los Matadores arrive on Raw.

We recap the Rhodes Family troubles. Cody and Goldust (and presumably Dusty) accept an invitation to Raw on Monday.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Miz charges at Orton to start and fires off left hands in the corner. A clothesline sends Orton to the floor and he goes into the post for good measure. Back in and Miz pounds away even more before kicking Orton in the face. The running corner clothesline only hits buckle though and Orton has a breather. Miz might have injured his shoulder and has to be looked at but says he can keep going. Orton immediately grabs the Elevated DDT and won’t let the doctor check on Miz again, drawing a DQ at 3:05. I’m not going to bother rating it due to a good chunk being spent on the medical check but this was more of an angle than a match.

Cue HHH to say that Orton isn’t getting out of it that easily so we’re restarting this as a No DQ match. Orton throws Miz over the announce table and then into the steps as he’s in psycho mode. Miz gets in a chair shot to the ribs but Orton gets in a shot of his own to take over again. Another Elevated DDT on the floor knocks Miz out cold but it’s the RKO for the pin at about 6:20 total.

Rating: C. Again this was more of an angle than a match. They’re doing a much better job at getting Orton over as a heel here though and that’s the important thing. Orton being all smug and holding the title isn’t going to get people to hate him but being a psycho that destroys people when they can’t defend themselves certainly will. Miz is a good choice for a sacrificial lamb.

Overall Rating: C. This was a story building show and there’s nothing wrong with that. The show flew by and never dragged, but there’s nothing on here you need to see. The good for business thing was a bit better tonight with HHH screwing over faces instead of heels like he did on Monday. Not a bad show but it was a supplement to Raw which is a bad choice for Smackdown.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. R-Truth – Superkick

Real American b. Prime Time Players – Patriot Lock to Young

Bray Wyatt b. Zack Ryder – Sister Abigail’s Kiss

Dolph Ziggler b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Shield interfered

Shield b. Rob Van Dam/Dolph Ziggler/Kofi Kingston – Ambrose pinned Kingston after a running knee to the head

AJ Lee b. Cameron – Shining Wizard

Santino Marella b. Heath Slater – Cobra

Randy Orton b. Miz – RKO

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 16, 2013
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the night after Night of Champions and Daniel Bryan is once again WWE Champion in a pretty big surprise. The main story though is the fast count that won Bryan the title as well as the potential controversy due to there being a second referee in the match, even though the original counted the fall. Other than that we have Ryback as the new Heyman guy to help Paul in his war with CM Punk. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips from the main events last night, focusing on Ryback joining Heyman and Bryan winning the title.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to open the show with the belt around his waist, I believe for the first time. Bryan looks at the belt before holding it above his head as the music ends. The fans chant for Bryan before he can speak and he calls them awesome. We hit the YES chant but here’s HHH before he can get to ten or so of them. A ticked off Game marches to the ring and says that he needs to address the 800lb gorilla in the ring. Everyone on social media and in the live audience tonight are talking about it, so referee Scott Armstrong needs to get out here right now.

We look at the end of the main event last night with HHH showing the difference between a count for Orton and a count for Bryan with the winning pin being much faster than the other one. Armstrong admits that it was a fast count and that it was a mistake. HHH thinks there’s more to it and Scott apparently says they’re onto us Daniel.

HHH sends Scott away and Bryan is confused. The title is immediately held up but he’s not giving it to Orton either. Bryan refuses to hand it over but here’s a power walking Orton to the ring. HHH says he has this one and tells Bryan to hand over the title before it’s taken from him. Bryan looks at the belt and says NO, only to take the RKO to put him down. Orton stands over Bryan after HHH leaves.

Back with HHH and Stephanie badmouthing Bryan when Orton comes in and demands his title back. Stephanie goes into beast mode to yell at him for his lack of respect. Orton isn’t going to be champion until he finds his old self.

Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title here I believe in a night of Champions rematch. Ziggler is from around these parts so the pop is solid. Feeling out process to start with Ambrose taking him into the corner, only to have Dolph come back with right hands and a shoulder block. A cross body and more right hands have Dan in trouble and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor. Back in and we hit the sleeper on the champion but Ambrose counters into one of his own. Ziggler jawbreaks out and stomps Dean in the corner, only to be whipped hard over the corner and out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose pounding Dolph down for two before we hit a leg lock with Dean’s knee in Ziggler’s back. Ambrose can’t quite hook a surfboard so he shifts over into a dragon sleeper in a nice quick change to avoid a botch. Ziggler comes back with right hands but gets sent out to the apron. Dean takes him to the top for the back rake and a butterfly superplex for two.

Off to a kind of half nelson arm lock followed by an attempt at a cobra clutch. Ziggler headbutts his way to freedom and a jumping DDT puts both guys down. Dolph rains down rights and lefts in the corner and takes Ambrose down with a clothesline. There are the ten elbow drops which is a good spot but takes too long. Ambrose comes right back with a spinebuster for two before pulling Ziggler off the middle rope with a crash. The bulldog driver is countered and the Zig Zag is good for the pin at 11:55.

Rating: C+. These guys have decent chemistry together but I’m not wild on the pin the champion to get the shot idea. Not only has it been done to death, but it keeps up the 50/50 booking idea which doesn’t do anything for either guy. Still though, decent match and it was a good idea to get Ziggler back on track.

Big Show is in Brad Maddox’s office, waiting on HHH and Stephanie. Back from a brake with the McMahons in the office, apparently having told Brad to make Bryan vs. Reigns tonight. Dusty Rhodes is in the building and HHH goes to meet him. Stephanie reminds us of the Big Show is broke storyline and tells him to stay in her office tonight until she needs him.

We talk about Punk vs. Heyman from last night.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

Yes they’ve somehow gotten two matches out of that dance off from Smackdown. After some quick dancing, Truth takes over with a quick right hand and a hip toss. Fandango is sent to the floor before coming back in with shots to the back. JBL is still complaining about the judge in the Floyd Mayweather fight. We hit the chinlock on truth as Cole explains the opening segment again. Truth comes back with a suplex into a Stunner for two before sending Fandango to the apron. The dancer comes back with an enziguri and the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 3:28.

Rating: D. Well that was boring. Summer Rae looked great but there’s not much else to say about most of these matches. None of these guys ever really go anywhere but at least it’s giving them something to do other than lose to bigger names. The match was nothing though as that dance off’s legs ended about five seconds after the segment from Smackdown stopped.

Dusty Rhodes is in the back and everyone loves him.

Here’s Big Dust for the latest chapter in the McMahons vs. the Rhodes families. Dusty says he’s here tonight as Virgil Runnels, not the American Dream. He talks about raising two good boys and spending all of his money to take care of them. Somehow though you find your way to do it because of the love you have for your boys. This isn’t about Dusty but rather about Cody losing his job for the sake of good business.

Dusty talks about how important children are to anyone and about Cody being a multiple time Intercontinental and world (tag team) champion before he was 22 years old. Dusty didn’t ask for this meeting but apparently has been given a business offer to get Cody’s job back, so Stephanie needs to get out here to make the offer.

Stephanie tells Virgil (just call him Dusty) that it’s an honor to see him and has a Bed Bath and Beyond gift card for Cody’s wedding gift. Stephanie talks about Dusty being the son of a plumber. “I can relate to that. I’m the daughter of a genius.” She and HHH are willing to offer Cody his job back, or they can give it to Goldust. It’s up to dusty but he refuses to make the decision.

They both talk over each other until Stephanie says he can pick the son who has done everything right or the son who he neglected all those years. Dusty asks about Stephanie’s daughters and says she can’t pick one of them to be her favorite so he’s not picking Goldust or Cody. Stephanie says it’s typical Dusty for him to make it all about himself. Dusty tells Stephanie where she can go….and here’s Shield.

They surround the ring but Stephanie calls them off. She tells Big Show to come to the ring and says Dusty has another choice: take the beating from Shield or be knocked out by Big Show. Again Dusty won’t pick so Stephanie tells Big Show to knock him out. Show starts crying again so Shield is told to go after Dusty. Show says no so Shield all gets chairs but Show hugs Dusty and knocks him, only to hug him down to the ground before Dusty collapses.

Post break Dusty is taken to an ambulance and Big Show rides with him.

Brie Bella/Cameron/Naomi vs. Aksana/Layla/Alicia Fox

AJ and Natalya are on commentary as Naomi starts with Layla. Off to Cameron as apparently Natalya’s headset doesn’t work. Layla kicks Cameron in the ribs to take over and it’s off to Aksana for some choking in the corner. Alicia comes in for a single whip into the corner before it’s back to Layla. The “wrestlers” work over Cameron and Natalya finally gets a headset to complain about AJ causing the audio problems. Everything breaks down and Brie hits an X Factor for the pin on Aksana at 2:58. This was a mess.

We look at how Sandow won MITB by showing Rhodes down for some reason.

Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Sandow knocks him down into the corner to start and drives in some left hands for two. The Russian legsweep and the Wind-Up elbow are good for two and we hit the chinlock. Rob easily fights up and hits a hurricanrana followed by some kicks to the face to take Sandow down. Rolling Thunder hits knees to give Damien two and the stepover kick puts Damien down. A Five Star keeps Damien as a loser at 2:40. Sandow’s music plays at first in an error.

The announcers recap the show so far.

Scott Armstrong comes in to apologize to HHH and gets fired.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Miz’s family is in the front row when Orton jumps him and rams Miz into the steps. Orton destroys him and we take a break. Back with Miz pounding away but getting stopped cold by a clothesline. The Elevated DDT is countered into a backdrop to the apron and a neck snap across the top rope. Miz is holding his left arm as they head to the floor with Orton being rammed into whatever object Miz can find. Randy comes back by sending Miz into the post and it’s a double countout at about 4:00 with maybe 1:00 shown. Nothing to see here.

Orton pounds away on Miz even more, only to have Miz come back with right hands of his own. Randy sends him into the barricade and gives Miz an Elevated DDT onto the concrete right in front of Miz’s parents. Randy still isn’t done as he grabs a chair and Pillmanizes Miz’s neck (the knee drop clearly hit Miz’s back).

Here are Ryback and Heyman with Paul in a wheelchair being pushed by Axel. Heyman is shaking and talks about the seven deadly sins and how many heathens there are here in Cleveland. There are so many people here who can never come close to doing what Heyman has done, such as pinning CM Punk. He can say it over and over again but every time it will be the truth. No matter how Punk tries to spin it, the record books will say Heyman won their first encounter.

Heyman would love to take credit for having some master plan but he has to stop for a Goldberg chant. Punk gave him a horrendous beating last night and it’s a miracle that he’s not in a nursing home right now. He pulled this off because one man took the initiative to change history. One man decided to stop Punk from destroying Heyman and it’s this big beautiful man right here. Heyman owes Ryback his life and he’ll continue to torment CM Punk for as long as he can. Ryback says he can’t stand a bully like CM Punk and he’s here to stop him. Ryback drops to a knee to put his arm around Heyman, earning a kiss on the cheek.

Tons of Funk vs. Real Americans vs. Usos

This is elimination rules and the winners get a title shot at some point in the future. Brodus knocks Swagger to the floor to start and the Real Americans have a huddle. Back in and Swagger tags in Jimmy Uso to face Brodus with Jimmy hitting whatever fast strikes he can to take over. Brodus casually catches a cross body and slams him down a few times. A backbreaker and elbow drop crush Jimmy but Cesaro tags himself in.

Jimmy takes Antonio down with a jumping elbow to the face and it’s off to Jey with a clothesline for two. A hard European uppercut knocks Jey down but he manages a tag to Tensai a few seconds later. Tensai hits a delayed butterfly suplex on Cesaro while not even looking like he’s straining. Cesaro gets clotheslined to the floor but Jimmy tagged himself in on the way down. Tensai pounds way on Jimmy but misses a splash in the corner. A hard clothesline puts Jimmy down and a bad looking choke bomb looks to get the pin, only to have Cesaro roll Tensai up for the elimination at 4:40.

Cesaro dropkicks Jimmy to the floor and we take a break. Back with Swagger holding both of Jimmy’s arms back. Apparently we missed the long giant swing from Cesaro during the break. Nice job on that WWE. The Vader Bomb crushes Jimmy and Cesaro jumps over Swagger’s shoulder for a double stomp to the chest. We hit the chinlock and the fans start chanting Randy Savage. Jimmy finally dives over for the hot tag to Jey who comes in off the top with a clothesline to Swagger.

Everything breaks down and a kick to the face gets two on Jack. The Usos hit a double plancha to the floor to take out the Real Americans in a cool spot. Back in and Jimmy gets caught in the Patriot Lock but he finally kicks away and superkicks Swagger down. The Superfly Splash is broken up by the running belly to belly but Jey tags himself in and hits the Superfly Splash for the pin and the title shot at 13:15.

Rating: C+. We didn’t need Tons of Funk but the second half of the match was really good stuff. Tag matches are a simple way to fire up the crowd and power vs. speed is the best formula you can use. The ending was great, the dives were great and the match (at least after the break) was really fun. Good stuff here.

Miz has an injured thorax and Dusty is being held overnight for observations.

The WWE loves reading!

Bray Wyatt talks about everyone wanting more and more of everything. There’s another world beyond ours and in his world, you put an animal out of its misery when it can’t find its way around. Bray asks if we want to see something really scary and we get a montage of him hitting Sister Abigail on everyone. He promises Abigail to put everyone down and smiles at the camera.

We look at Dusty being knocked out earlier.

People encourage Daniel Bryan in the back.

Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Rollins, Ambrose and Orton are all at ringside. Bryan fires off kicks in the corner to start before ramming Reigns’ head into the other buckle. Reigns ducks the clothesline so Bryan goes back to the leg with a dragon screw leg whip. Bryan goes after the leg but Roman kicks him away. Reigns sends him into the corner but Bryan comes back with even more kicks. Off to a leg lock with Bryan dropping forearms to Roman’s jaw. Roman finally gets up and drives Daniel into the corner and clotheslines him down to take over.

We hit the chinlock on Bryan but he gets back up and hits a knee into Reigns’ knee to take him down. Reigns hits a knee to the chest of his own but Bryan casually leg dives him down again. Now let’s look at the fast count from last night because that story hasn’t been driven into us in awhile. Reigns slams him down for two and now we look at the regular speed count AND the fast count. NOW THEY’RE SIDE BY SIDE!!! Reigns powers Bryan down into a chinlock but Daniel comes back with the missile dropkick to send Roman to the floor, only to have the FLYING GOAT caught in mid air. Bryan is rammed into the post as we take a break.

Back with Reigns placing Bryan on the top rope but Bryan punches his way out of a superplex attempt. The flying headbutt misses though and Reigns gets a two count. Roman talks a lot of trash and catches a charging Bryan in a spinning Rock Bottom for two. Bryan fights out of another chinlock and backflips over Reigns to hit the running clothesline. Here come more kicks but Reigns catches the big one in a Samoan drop. Orton is now standing and looking nervous.

Reigns calls for the powerbob but Bryan counters into a rollup for two. The BIG kick to the head gets two for Bryan and Reigns rolls to the floor. Bryan hits an insanely hard baseball slide dropkick to take out Rollins but he takes too long knocking Ambrose down and gets caught by a big running clothesline from Reigns. Not that it matters as Bryan hooks the YES Lock, drawing in Orton for the DQ at 18:20.

Rating: B-. This was good stuff but it went on a bit too long. Reigns isn’t ready to go nearly twenty minutes on his own yet but he certainly didn’t look bad. That’s a good sign as he’s got more to him than just the power and look, which is rare for a guy that size. Good main event here and a good performance from Reigns. Bryan was his usual self.

Post match Orton gets caught in the YES Lock but Shield makes the save. Orton and SHield beat Bryan down and they load up the chair around Bryan’s neck but the entire midcard plus Dolph Ziggler and RVD come out for the save. Reigns spears Kingston down but Ziggler and RVD knock Ambrose to the floor. A double superkick from the Usos take out Reigns and Bryan hits the running knee to Rollins. Eveyrone puts Bryan on their shoulders for a celebration to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. A lot of stuff happened here and it makes for an interesting set up to Battleground. The title being stripped was pretty clear given how things went last night but I didn’t think it would happen that fast. The ending was what we’ve been waiting on since Summerslam and it worked very well. The Dusty’s Choice segment was awesome stuff but Orton trying to be all aggressive didn’t work all that well. I mean….it’s Miz. Also, an injured thorax? You can’t say chest anymore? It’s a good show with some good wrestling, but as usual there’s too much here to drag it to three hours.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Dean Ambrose – Zig Zag

Fandango b. R-Truth – Guillotine legdrop

Brie Bella/Cameron/Naomi b. Aksana/Layla/Alicia Fox – Bella Buster to Aksana

Rob Van Dam b. Damien Sandow – Five Star Frog Splash

Randy Orton vs. The Miz went to a double countout

Usos b. Real Americans and Tons of Funk – Superfly Splash to Swagger

Daniel Bryan b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Randy Orton interfered

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Night of Champions 2013
Date: September 15, 2013
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is the first PPV after the big summer angle with the rise of the new Corporation. Our main event tonight is Randy Orton defending his title against Daniel Bryan in Bryan’s first one on one shot against the new champion. The other main event is CM Punk vs. Paul Heyman/Curtis Axel in an elimination tag for Punk’s chance to get his hands on Heyman. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Turmoil

This is a tag team gauntlet match with the winning team earning a tag title shot at Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns later in the show. There are five teams in total with two teams starting. The winners of the first match move on to face the next team, last team standing wins. It’s 3MB vs. Tons of Funk (minus the Funkadactyls) to get us going.

Brodus starts with Heath (teaming with McIntyre here) and quickly crushes Slater in the corner. Off to Tensai who follows Slater to the floor. Drew busts out a flip dive over the top of all things to take over for a bit. Back in and Tensai gets two off a sunset flip but Drew pounds away in the corner, only to get rolled up for the pin by Tensai at 2:40.

The Real Americans are in next but 3MB sticks around to beat on Tensai. Cesaro shouts WE THE PEOPLE and it’s time for a commercial on the pre-show. Back with Cesaro still shouting WE THE PEOPLE before Tensai counters a suplex to take him down. Hot tag brings in Brodus to clean house with his headbutt to the chest and a splash in the corner but Swagger breaks up the cover off the middle rope splash. Swagger makes a blind tag and puts a covering Brodus into the Patriot Lock for the submission at 5:16 total.

It’s the Usos in fourth, meaning the Prime Time Players are last. They charge in to the ring with Jey hitting a big flip dive over the top to take out Swagger and a slingshot moonsault connects on Cesaro. Swagger comes in legally with a belly to belly suplex on Jey before we hit the armbar. Back to Cesaro for some choking and we take ANOTHER break. Do we really need commercials during a big commercial?

After seeing the same explanation of how to order the show that we got in the first commercial break, we’re back with Cesaro being knocked off the apron but Swagger avoids the Superfly Splash and the Patriot Lock submits Jey at 10:00. It’s the Prime Time Players in last with Titus cleaning house on Swagger. A fall away slam puts Jack down but he takes Titus’ leg out, only to have Darren Young break up another Patriot Lock. The hot tag brings in Young but he gets caught in the Patriot Lock as well. Young rolls through and the Gut Check gives the Players the title shot at 11:55 total. Cesaro was gone for the last fall.

Rating: D+. These matches are fun in theory but I’ve never cared for them for the most part. At the end of the day, it doesn’t work to see these falls go down in just a few minutes. There’s no time to get any story going and one of the last two teams in line always wins the thing. Nothing special here and I think everyone knew the Players were winning here.

The opening video is about what defines a champion with clips of men like Sammartino, Hogan, Michaels and Austin. It transitions into the usual PPV opening video focusing on the main events.

Here’s HHH to open the show. He thanks us for joining him in what’s best for business and says he’s listening to the audience. There won’t be any interference in the main event from anyone, including Shield, Big Show or anyone else. HHH asks us if we’re ready for Night of Champions which brings out Heyman (in a suit) and Curtis Axel.

Heyman says he’s tried everything to get a message to HHH but this is the best he can do. HHH asks Heyman when he last slept or showered and Paul snaps that he’s stressed out. Heyman complains about the position he’s been put in as we’re ten minutes into the show and this is what we’re getting. He explains the entire story of Punk vs. Heyman/Lesnar as well as the match we’ve got tonight in case you bought all the PPVs available tonight and aren’t sure what you want to watch.

Apparently the handicap match is No DQ which must have been announced on the pre-show. HHH says Heyman shouldn’t be worried if he trusts Curtis Axel as much as he claims to. The match stays on so now Axel gets to beg for his boss’ life. He brings up beating HHH in a match as the fans chant BORING. HHH says this is Night of Champions so HHH is going to go to the back and the first person he finds gets an IC Title shot.

Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Kofi Kingston

Well this is a letdown. Kofi takes him down by the wrist and sends Axel to the floor. Back in and Curtis avoids the double leapfrog and bails to the floor again because the seventeen minutes of stalling to open the show weren’t enough. Kofi kicks him on the way back in and Axel is on the floor for the third time in three minutes. Back in again and a dropkick gets two on the champion so Axel goes outside AGAIN. Kingston gets tired of waiting and goes outside but gets sent into the steps. Kofi stops himself and jumps to the apron and then the top for a spinning cross body to the floor.

Back inside again and Axel gets in a cheap shot to take over. Kofi is tied up in the Tree of Woe for a spear to the ribs and the snap Saito Suplex is good for two. We hit the neck crank followed by a clothesline for two for the champion. A quick slam gets two on Kofi as this boring match continues. Back to the chinlock for a bit before Kofi tries to spin around a clothesline but can’t quite pull it off as crisply as he wanted to. A DDT gets two on Axel and Kofi’s spinning cross body off the top gets the same.

There’s the Boom Drop but Trouble in Paradise misses. Axel drives Kofi into the corner but walks into a pendulum kick. Kofi goes up, only to dive into a dropkick to the chest for two. Kingston escapes another Saito Suplex and a side roll gets two. The SOS is countered and Trouble in Paradise is ducked but Kofi counters Curtis’ neckbreaker into the SOS for…..something as the camera is on Heyman at what could have been the three count. It’s only two so Kofi goes to the corner, only to wind up on Axel’s shoulders and dropped on the top rope. The neckbreaker into the cutter are good enough to retain Curtis’ title at 14:05.

Rating: C. When civilization has come to an end and the human race is gone, Kofi Kingston will still be in the Intercontinental Title hunt. The match wasn’t terrible and it got WAY better at the end, but the first five minutes of this match were way too boring. Also what’s the idea of having Axel in a nearly fifteen minute match before he was a big underdog in the match later? Methinks something is up.

Chris Jericho is named the best IC Champion ever with 63% of the vote over Mr. Perfect, Pat Patterson, Rick Rude and Honky Tonk Man. Those are your only options.

Ricardo teaches Van Dam how to say his finishing moves in Spanish. Also Del Rio has no testicular fortitude and the universal term for World Heavyweight Champion is RVD.

AJ’s new friends (Aksana/Alicia/Layla) want nothing to do with her for the title match. AJ says they’re nothing without her, which makes me think they’re actually pushing the Total Divas as the good ones in this.

Trish Stratus dominates Michelle McCool, Wendi Richter, Lita and Fabulous Moolah to be named best Divas/Women’s Champion ever.

We get the entire promo that set up AJ vs. the Total Divas and the Total Divas beating AJ up.

Divas Title: Natalya vs. Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee vs. Naomi

Big face reaction for AJ despite the lack of clarity in whom we’re supposed to cheer for. AJ gets chased to the floor and sent into the barricade before. The challengers all kick AJ to the floor before the Total Divas break down. The crowd goes SILENT when AJ isn’t in there. Brie cleans house but walks into a dropkick from Naomi. Those two take each other out an AJ grabs a rollup on Natalya for two. The Rear View gets two on Natalya and Brie loads up a superplex on Naomi.

Natalya makes the save but has to duck a high cross body from Naomi. AJ sends Naomi to the floor but Naomi pops back up onto the apron to totally miss a high kick to Brie. Natalya baseball slides AJ to the floor and suplexes Brie down for no cover. Brie breaks up a Sharpshooter on Naomi so Natalya slams her down onto Naomi. Why the referee doesn’t count Naomi while Brie is on top of her isn’t clear. Natalya puts both of them in a Sharpshooter which I believe she did to Laycool before but AJ makes the save. There’s the Black Widow on Natalya for the submission to retain AJ’s title at 5:45.

Rating: D. This is in no way related to AJ because she did everything she could out there. These other girls SUCK and no one cares about them. There’s nothing else to it than that. They’re getting this push because they’re horrible to each other on a reality show and that’s supposed to make them interesting wrestlers. Yeah Natalya can go in the ring and Naomi is athletic, but that doesn’t mean anyone cares about them. I’m being very generous with the rating actually. It was that bad.

We go to the All-Star panel of Alex Riley, Booker T and Santino Marella.

World Heavyweight Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending, Rob is the hometown boy (close enough) and Ricardo is here after being banned from ringside on Smackdown. Del Rio quickly takes him down but Rob comes right back with a kick to the face. A loud spinwheel kick in the corner has the champion staggered and a monkey flip gets two. Del Rio hits a dropkick of all things but misses a charge and falls to the floor. A slingshot moonsault puts Alberto down and Rob drapes him across the barricade for the spin kick to the back.

Del Rio blocks a suplex back in and brings Rob to the apron before knocking him out to the floor. The champion’s suicide dive takes Van Dam down and Del Rio sends him into the barricade. We hit the chinlock before Rob rolls him up for two. A snap suplex puts Rob right back down and Del Rio does the finger point. Del Rio kicks him in the back of the head for two and it’s back to the chinlock. An enziguri sends Del Rio to the floor but Alberto misses a dive and crashes on the outside.

Back in and a kick to the face gets two for Rob and the middle rope thrust kick gets the same. A top rope kick to the face sets up Rolling Thunder but Alberto rolls away and hits the Backstabber for two. Rob breaks up the reverse superplex and the cannonball off the top gets two. They slug it out with Del Rio getting two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Rob kicks his way out of the armbreaker and gets two off a rollup.

The split legged moonsault gets the same but Alberto comes back with a Codebreaker on the arm. Del Rio’s low superkick gets two but Rob kicks him off the ropes. The Five Star hits knees and there’s the armbreaker but Rob gets to a rope….and Del Rio holds on through the five count for the DQ at 14:28.

Rating: C+. The match was fine but the ending crippled anything it could have been. Alberto just isn’t interesting as a champion whatsoever but he’s been in every PPV Smackdown Title match this year. I don’t know who we’re waiting on to take the title from him but this wasn’t the right ending for this match.

Post match Rob hits a Van Terminator to wake the crowd up.

Axel is confident while Heyman panics even more. We’ve covered this for weeks now.

Booker T beats out Flair, Edge, Batista and Undertaker as greatest World Champion ever. WHAT?

Orton wants to know what HHH is thinking. HHH says he’s just making sure he picked the right face of the WWE.

The Miz vs. Fandango

Here’s the filler match we all knew was coming. Fandango dances around to start and drives some elbows into Miz’s neck. Miz comes back but can’t hit the Reality Check or put on the Figure Four, allowing Fandango to send him to the apron. Back in and Miz hits the corner clothesline but a Summer Rae distraction lets Fandango take over again. We hit a chinlock with a bodyscissors as a Summer Rae chant starts up.

The announcers are talking about baseball as Miz sends Fandango to the floor, only to jump into a kick to the ribs. Now it’s a Randy Savage chant as the fans just do not care about this match. Miz fights up and goes after the leg before hitting the short DDT for two. Now the fans want tables. Fandango suplexes him down for two and ties Miz up in the ropes for a guillotine legdrop for two. The real guillotine legdrop misses and Miz gets two as the crowd groans. Thankfully the Figure Four ends Fandango at 8:00.

Rating: D. This show is sinking like a stone. The fans didn’t care about this at all and there’s no reason for them to. It’s a feud about Miz interrupting Fandango’s dancing and that’s about it. Why would I want to see that on a show I’m paying to see? Also it’s a bad idea after such a dull show so far.

WWE loves the National Guard.

We recap Punk vs. Heyman/Axel. Punk asked Heyman to stop coming to the ring with him so Heyman screwed him over at MITB. Punk swore revenge so Heyman brought Lesnar back to beat Punk up with Brock getting the pin at Summerslam. Now it’s Heyman/Axel vs. Punk in an elimination match so Punk can get his hands on Heyman.

Paul Heyman/Curtis Axel vs. CM Punk

No DQ and it’s under elimination rules. Heyman of course hides on the floor as the other guys swing kendo sticks at each other. Axel gets in a shot but Punk comes back with a series of his own to take over. Curtis gets knocked down and Punk dives through the ropes to get at Heyman. Paul is taken into the ring and put in a chinlock before Punk picks up the stick. CM takes too long though and a low blow drops Punk. Curtis pounds away and gets in some stick shots to the back.

The beating continues as Heyman does Brock’s bounce on the floor. The fans still want tables but they get chops and forearms from Punk instead. Axel hits a clothesline to the back of the head for two and it’s table time, making Curtis the most over guy in the arena for a split second. The table is set up in the corner but Punk blocks a suplex through the table, only to have Axel do the same. Axel takes Punk down again and we hit another chinlock.

Punk fights up and sends Curtis into a chair in the corner, knocking Axel to the floor. Back in and Punk hits his swinging neckbreaker and the knee into the corner. Axel rolls away before the Macho Elbow and gets in a chair shot for two. The lone boring chant is blocked out by a Punk chant as Axel gets two off a neckbreaker of his own. Heyman shouts that Axel is better than Punk as Curtis strolls around the ring. More kendo stick shots to Punk’s back get two but Punk counters the neckbreaker into the cutter into the GTS. The Anaconda Vice gets the tap out at 10:40 to get us down to Punk vs. Heyman.

Punk wisely keeps the hold on to knock Axel out even more before going after Heyman. Heyman slowly walks around the ring before running up the ramp, only to go into the crowd and back to ringside. Punk catches him in the ring and pulls on Heyman’s ears and nose. Punk gets the stick but Heyman hugs him. The smile on Punk’s face is rather creepy as he canes Heyman down. Heyman: “OH THAT HURTS!” Punk pounds away before calling for the GTS. He’s not ready yet though as he pulls out the handcuffs from his boot, just like Heyman used on him for the big beating a few weeks ago.

Heyman tries to tap out but the fans think this is awesome. Heyman begs for mercy, making it even better. Punk hits him very slowly with the stick and says to remember that it was him doing this to Paul. Heyman tries to tap with his foot so Punk promises to break Paul’s face. Cue Ryback to drive Punk through the table, slicing Punk’s back open in a scary looking visual. Heyman is placed on top for the pin at 1 5:56.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it was supposed to be: Punk getting some revenge, only to have Heyman debut his new guy to give Punk a real challenge next month at Battleground. At the end of the day, Axel just isn’t competition for CM Punk and everyone knew it. Ryback isn’t a huge star, but he’s a much bigger deal than Axel and gives Punk a much better challenge. Good choice here and the perfect booking.

Punk refuses medical attention for his back.

More expert panel stuff.

US Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Ziggy beat Ambrose via DQ on Friday to get this shot. Feeling out process with Ziggler trying to speed things up, only to have Dean grab the rope. Ziggler gets two off a dropkick and there are the ten elbow drops. They tumble out to the floor and Dean takes over before heading back inside for a knee in the back and some face rubbing into the mat. We hit a reverse chinlock followed by a regular chinlock until Ziggler fights up and gets two off a sunset flip.

They trade rollups for two each and Ziggy goes to the middle rope, only to be knocked down so Dean can slowly rake his back. A superplex gets two for the champion so Dean flips over the top and goes up but Ziggler catches him in a top rope X Factor for two. Ambrose’s full nelson is countered into a rollup for two and Dean goes to the corner.

A Stinger Splash and ten punches set up a clothesline for two on Ambrose and it’s off to the sleeper. Dean easily suplexes his way to freedom and a near fall but gets caught in the Fameasser for a close two. Dean’s bulldog driver is countered into a rollup for two but the second attempt is good for the pin to retain the title at 9:54.

Rating: C+. I liked this one more than I thought I would. This is the kind of match the show needed: a fast paced, back and forth match with both guys looking good. A clean win over a former world champion is nothing but good for Dean and the match was a nice pickup as well. Good stuff here.

Sting is named best US Champion ever over Bobo Brazil, Harley Race, Sgt. Slaughter and Ricky Steamboat.

Tag Titles: Prime Time Players vs. Shield

It’s Rollins/Reigns defending as the Players won tag team turmoil on the pre-show. Rollins and Titus start in a nice power vs. speed matchup. Seth can’t throw Titus around and has his cross body caught, only for O’Neil to throw him down like it’s nothing. Off to Young with a headlock on the mat followed by some shoulder blocks and a clothesline for two. Roman gets the tag and blocks an O’Connor Roll before being sent to the outside.

A big elbow gets two for Young and it’s back to Titus to pound on Rollins some more. All Players so far as Titus blows the whistle, allowing Rollins to bail to the floor. Darren follows Seth to the floor, allowing Shield to take over as they come back inside. It’s Reigns working over Darren before throwing him back to the outside.

Back in and Seth hooks a chinlock on Young before slapping him around a bit. Young comes back with a quick belly to belly but Reigns blocks the hot tag. Darren sends him into the corner and backdrops Seth down, allowing for the hot tag to Titus. O’Neil starts cleaning house and hits the release fall away slam on Rollins. Clash of the Titus gets two as Reigns makes the trademark Shield save. Young and Roman go to the floor but Reigns jumps back in for the spear on Titus, giving Seth the retaining pin at 7:30.

Rating: C. This was fine all things considered. The Players weren’t going to get the belts and everyone knew it, but it’s nice to see a fresh team in the title scene. It’s not like those two getting a title shot is a stretch or anything so I can’t imagine a ton of complaints about Young being pushed. Nothing special here but it was fine.

We look at Heyman vs. Punk some more.

DX is named the greatest tag team of all time over the Wild Samoans, the Bulldogs, the LOD and the Harts. That’s so laughable I’m not even going to bother making fun of it.

We recap the main event. Bryan won the title from John Cena at Summerslam before being screwed over by HHH and Randy Orton, bringing in the new Corporation with Orton being named best for business. Bryan was then beaten down for weeks on end as he waited for his one on one rematch with Orton here tonight. No one has been allowed to help Bryan for fear of losing their jobs. Cody Rhodes questioned things and lost his job in a match against Orton.

Hulk Hogan dominates Cena, Punk, HHH and Austin as Best WWE Champion ever. All of the polls were landslides.

WWE Championship: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

HHH has guaranteed no interference but there are no special rules. BIG pop for Bryan as expected. Feeling out process to start with Bryan taking the arm for early control. Orton takes him down with a shoulder but Bryan fires off a knee to the ribs to take over. Bryan unleashes the kicks but Orton comes right back with a clothesline. Randy takes too much time posing and Bryan comes back with right hands, only to be clotheslined down again for two.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Orton fights up and pounds away at Orton’s head with some good aggression. Randy comes back with a knee to the ribs and the slow circle stomp They’re doing the slow build here for the big finishing sequence. Orton rains down right hands in the corner with the fans chanting NO on each one in a nice touch. Bryan fights back with the running clothesline and the kicks in the corner as Orton is suddenly reeling. The headbutt connects to send Orton to the floor for the FLYING GOAT.

Back in and the missile dropkick sends Orton to the floor again, setting up a second FLYING GOAT! Back in again but Orton bails to the other side of the ring but Bryan’s third FLYING GOAT meets a forearm. Orton hits the Elevated DDT on the floor but Bryan slides back in at nine for a nice false finish. Orton does the finger point and loads up the RKO, only to have Bryan escape but knock the referee to the floor.

Bryan can’t get the YES Lock but there’s a second referee in now. Orton’s powerslam gets two but the Elevated DDT is countered into the YES Lock in the middle of the ring. Bryan is CRANKING on it too with the arm looking like a pretzel. Orton very slowly crawls over and finally makes the rope in another nice false finish. There are more kicks in the corner but the running dropkick misses. The first referee is still on the floor which makes me very nervous of a double fall.

Orton puts Bryan on the corner but Bryan slips through the legs and crotches the champion. Orton is put down into the Tree of Woe for more kicks to the ribs and now the running dropkick connects. Bryan loads up a belly to back superplex but Orton knocks him down, only to have Daniel pop up with a forearm to a seated champion. Now Bryan’s superplex connects but Bryan hangs on by the legs.

A LONG flying headbutt hits Orton but Randy is out at two. The original referee is back in now which isn’t something you see that often. Bryan unleashes more kicks but Orton catchs the big one into the high collar suplex to put both guys down. Orton can’t get a backslide so Bryan hits the big kick to the head and the running knee gets the pin and the title 17:49.

Rating: B+. This took awhile to get going but once they got on a roll they didn’t stop. That running knee has become a devastating finisher and it worked very well here again. I’m sure there will be more shenanigans in the future but the match tonight was very good. Solid stuff here and I can’t say I’m upset that Bryan won. Good stuff here, as you would expect.

Bryan celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The last couple of matches saved this from being one of the least interesting shows I’ve ever seen. It’s still not a good show but it set up Battleground well enough. That’s the problem with having three PPVs in seven weeks: there’s not enough time to build anything up. Nothing really happened tonight and it felt like a big episode of Raw. I’ve seen worse but this was a huge drop after Summerslam.

Results

Prime Time Players won Tag Team Turmoil last eliminating the Real Americans

Curtis Axel b. Kofi Kingston – Neckbreaker into a faceplant

AJ Lee b. Natalya, Naomi and Brie Bella – Black Widow to Natalya

Rob Van Dam b. Alberto Del Rio via DQ when Del Rio wouldn’t break the cross armbreaker

Paul Heyman/Curtis Axel b. CM Punk – Heyman pinned Punk after a spear through a table by Ryback

Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler – Bulldog driver

Shield b. Prime Time Players – Spear to O’Neil

Daniel Bryan b. Randy Orton – Running knee to the head

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It’s time for the first PPV after the big angle started and things aren’t really looking all that promising.  The show just doesn’t have the big event feel that it should.  The card is pretty weak but it isn’t entirely without promise.  Let’s get to it.As usual we’ll stat with the pre-show match: tag team turmoil for a shot at the Shield for the belts later in the night.  I’ll go with the Prime Time Players to get the shot as they’ve been pushed pretty strong lately.  The Real Americans and 3MB aren’t getting a title shot and no one would care about Tons of Funk.  The only other option would be the Usos but I can’t see them getting a chance after losing so many times.  The Players won’t win the belts, but it has potential to be a decent match.

On to the two main events, starting with the title match.  I know it’s up in the air, but I can’t picture Bryan winning the title back, not yet at least.  This feels like it ends either in someone like Big Show turning heel or a DQ with Bryan getting the win.  It’s still too early for the title change though and Orton walks out with the gold.

Punk vs. Heyman/Axel is an interesting match.  Heyman has made it so clear that if Punk gets his hands on him, Heyman is gone.  For weeks now this match has felt like we’re waiting on Heyman to bring in someone else for Punk to feud with until Lesnar has some dates opened up but unless Ryback decides he’s a Heyman Guy, I don’t think we’re going to see anything but Axel.  I think Curtis gets eliminated but Punk doesn’t get his hands on Heyman for some reason, setting up the ultimate revenge inside the Cell in some form next month.

It’s probably a bad hunch but I think Del Rio walks out with the gold tomorrow night.  RVD is back in WWE to put people over and I think he does it for Alberto tomorrow night.  The interesting thing is who takes the title from Del Rio eventually, but I don’t think it’s Van Dam.

Unfortunately Brie Bella wins the Divas Title because being an evil woman on a badly scripted reality show is all you need to become a wrestling champion anymore.

My random hunch sure to go wrong; Ziggler takes the US Title.

Overall the show doesn’t look very good.  It comes off like a filler show and that’s not a good thing most of the time.  The main event feels like it’s a tool for setting up another match down the line.  The other problem is we have a two match show, but I don’t know how many people are interested in the second main event.  They’re definitely not going to get any help from the Smackdown title but it’s been that way for years.  The show should be ok and odds are they’ll add a Miz vs. Fandango match to pad out the card, but there’s just not enough here to make me want to see the show.

Thoughts/predictions?

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 2, 2013
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re closing in on Night of Champions with the main story still being Bryan vs. the Corporation. The interesting turn of events on Smackdown was Big Show getting very close to helping Bryan without actually doing so, by standing over Bryan to prevent Shield from attacking him. It only lasted for a few moments though as HHH made him leave to humiliate Show again, but the fuse is about to run out. Let’s get to it.

We open with Shield in their now usual spot between the ring and the stage and HHH in the ring. The Game introduces Orton for his opening address. Orton talks about how it’s his job to protect this company and he won’t let its image be tarnished. If you disrespect Orton, you’re disrespecting the WWE. The fans disagree with this theory and let the champion know about it. Last week Daniel Bryan defaced Orton’s new car so on Smackdown, Orton defaced Bryan by spray painting him.

Orton plays the audience’s favorite game by asking questions and then answering them himself. Does Bryan deserve a title shot? NO. Would Bryan have a chance against Randy Orton? NO. Will Bryan ever be an A-list player? NO. Should Bryan give up his title shot at Night of Champions? YES! HHH says that it’s his job to give the fans what they want every week. Over the last few weeks, HHH has been starting to worry about the health and well being of Daniel Bryan.

That’s a problem and the fans are making it even worse with their YES chants. Those chants are making Daniel Bryan confuse popularity with what is best for business. A few years ago there was a superstar named Doink the Clown. Doink was wildly popular but the idea of Doink being WWE Champion would have been bad for business. Daniel Bryan will never be WWE Champion, but maybe HHH can bring back the Cruiserweight or European Titles as realistic goals for Bryan.

Cue Bryan to the arena to say that HHH and Orton have made some great points. Bryan is thrilled to be compared to Doink the Clown but he doesn’t think Doink ever got chants like the ones he’s getting. The only clowns are standing in the ring right now because they think he’s actually giving up his title shot. HHH already gave up his manhood when he cut his hair and became a sellout and Orton gave up being in the WWE Title picture until someone gave him the title on a silver platter.

Bryan says he won’t give up his title shot and Orton wants to know why Bryan would be willing to take so many beatings. Bryan talks about how he’s used to being told he can’t do things but he’s proven everything wrong. That’s something Orton can never understand because he was handed everything. Daniel doesn’t think he can beat Orton for the WWE Championship because he knows he can.

Orton and HHH know it too because they keep putting him in handicap matches and gauntlet matches instead of letting them go one on one. Orton may have the genetics of a champion but he doesn’t have the heart of a champion. HHH wants to know why Bryan is so angry all the time. The anger should be directed at Big Show for never helping him when he has an iron clad contract. Therefore tonight it’s Big Show vs. Daniel Bryan.

HHH and Orton are in the back and seem very pleased with their decisions tonight. They run into Cody Rhodes who thinks the main event tonight will be great as long as no one gets involved. HHH wants to know why people would get involved. Cody asks Orton why he doesn’t want to face Daniel Bryan because that would be best for business. HHH doesn’t like Cody’s input and gives him a match with Randy Orton as a wedding present. If Cody loses he’s out of a job.

Fandango vs. The Miz

A hiptoss puts Fandango down but he rolls to the floor to escape the Figure Four. Miz sends Fandango into the barricade and does a quick dance with Summer before heading back inside. Fandango gets in a few shots to take over but a kick to the chest gets two for Miz. We hit the chinlock and take a break. Back with Fandango in control despite apparently having a broken nose.

Fandango goes to the middle rope but gets taken down by a dragon screw legwhip. The Figure Four is countered again and Miz misses the corner clothesline. A slingshot legdrop puts Miz down but it hurts Fandango’s leg again. Not that it matters as Miz puts on the Figure Four from the mat for the submission at 8:15.

Rating: D. The match was pretty bad but it’s understandable if Fandango got hurt halfway through it. I can even forgive the lack of a Skull Crushing Finale as you don’t want Fandango’s injured face going straight into the mat. Not much to see here but it’s a bit more understandable given the circumstances.

Booker T gives Daniel Bryan a pep talk but thinks maybe Bryan should give up his title match. Bryan: “Tell me you didn’t just say that.” It’s about Bryan’s life, not the title. Booker warns that HHH and company could ruin his life.

We recap Heyman/Axel vs. Punk from last week.

Dolph Ziggler vs. ???

Ziggler is here for a match but Dean Ambrose jumps him from behind and sends Ziggler into the post. Ambrose says Dolph needs to show more respect. Here’s Dolph’s opponent.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Ryback

Ziggler says he can go but walks right into an overhead belly to belly. Ryback pounds away at the back of his head and tosses Ziggler around by the hair. Dolph is stomped down as the idiot fans tell Ryback that he can’t wrestle. The Meat Hook is blocked by a dropkick followed by a Stinger Splash and right hands in the corner. Not that they matter though as the Meat Hook takes Dolph down and Shell Shock is good for the pin at 3:06.

Rating: D+. Again no time to go anywhere here but it sets up Ziggler vs. Ambrose at the PPV for the US Title. Ryback can be fine as a guy who just beats up various people until he has an actual feud with someone standing up to him. Also it’s a good idea to have Ziggler beaten down in advance to build sympathy for him.

Brad Maddox tells Stephanie and HHH that Big Show isn’t willing to fight Bryan tonight. Stephanie will deal with this in public.

Here’s Stephanie to deal with Big Show. She talks about how Big Show helped her grow up

backstage as a kid and how much she respects him. Big Show comes out and is told sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to. She reminds him that he’s broke due to handing out too much money and some bad investments.

The iron clad contract doesn’t work if he doesn’t perform and his career can’t go on much longer due to getting older. How many other jobs are there for people his size? Stephanie says that the reality for Big Show is he won’t live that long because of his size, so he needs to take care of his family while he can. I have no idea what to say to that. Stephanie hugs him and Big Show is about to cry.

Edge will be back next week for one night only. Cool.

Big Show broke a lot of stuff during the break.

Here’s how to download the WWE App because the WWE thinks you’re stupid.

3MB vs. Prime Time Players

It’s Slater and Mahal for 3MB tonight. Slater starts with Titus and is quickly launched into the corner. Titus stomps him down and blows the whistle at the same time (Cole: “Whistle while you work!”) before it’s off to Young. Mahal comes in and gets caught in an atomic drop for two. The announcers of course ignore the match to talk about Big Show and his contract.

Young gets taken down and triple teamed by the Band with Slater getting two off a neckbreaker. Mahal comes in to drop a bunch of knees to the chest but Slater charges into an overhead belly to belly suplex. The hot tag brings in Titus who gets two off a big boot to Mahal. Everything breaks down and the Clash of the Titus gets the pin on Mahal at 5:28.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here again but it’s better than the Real Americans losing over and over again. The Players are probably going to get a title shot assuming the Shield keeps the belts that much longer. They’re not bad in the ring or anything and the fans are into the dance so no complaints for the most part.

Brad Maddox is on the phone when Heyman comes in and says get off. Heyman isn’t pleased with the idea of having to face Punk at Night of Champions because he’ll disappear if Punk gets his hands on him. He wants an explanation but here’s HHH to say he approved that match. Heyman’s tone changes as he asks why HHH made the match. HHH talks about how it’s what the fans want and maybe Heyman can weasel his way out of it.

Bray Wyatt talks about the story of Icarus flying too close to the sun and melting his wax wings. Kane tried to get too close to the Wyatt Family and it was like a lamb being led to the slaughter. Kane made his bed and now he’s burning in it.

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

If Cody loses he’s gone. Orton pounds away in the corner to start and takes him down with a clothesline. Rhodes is draped over the top rope and sent out to the floor, but he sends Randy into the steps for a breather. Cody cranks on the arm and gets two off a dropkick before pounding away in the corner. Orton gets choked on the ropes but comes back with a poke to the eye for two. More right hands have Randy in control but Cody comes back with a release front suplex and right hands of his own in the corner. Orton hits the backbreaker out of said corner to send Cody to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Orton throwing Cody back inside for two but Cody comes back with an elbow to the jaw and an uppercut to put Rhodes down. A springboard missile dropkick gets a close two and the Disaster Kick gets the same. Orton sidesteps the moonsault press and puts Cody down with the Elevated DDT. The RKO is countered into the Cross Rhodes out of nowhere for a VERY close two. I thought that was it. The fans are WAY into Cody here but Orton snaps his throat across the top rope. Back in and Rhodes gets two off a rollup but another Disaster Kick misses and the RKO connects for the pin at 13:35.

Rating: B. When you have me believing that Cody Rhodes could beat Randy Orton, you’re doing something right. I’m not sure where they’re going to go with Cody now as he got a good rub here but apparently he’s gone for a bit due to the loss. Either they’re going back on what they said or he’s really taking time off for some reason. Still though, good match here.

HHH comes out to praise Cody but fires him anyway. The fans chant for Cody as he limps to the back.

Here’s CM Punk with a kendo stick and something to say. He says “I promise” which are words that don’t mean much to a lot of people around here. Punk says he’s tired of empty threats and that he’s having trouble of trying to come up with what to say next. Right now he doesn’t want to wrestle because he wants to fight. He wants to fight Paul Heyman and if he has to go through Curtis Axel to do so then that’s fine with him.

After what happened last week, even he doesn’t want to fight himself right now. Punk guarantees that in 13 days, he’s going to get what he wants. Heyman has been talking about Punk breaking his heart, but at Night of Champions Punk is going to break Heyman’s face. He promises.

We look at Heyman attacking Punk last week.

Big Show comes in to apologize to Bryan for the match tonight but Bryan understands and says he’ll win.

We recap AJ’s promo from last week on the Total Divas. It’s going to be interesting to see who is supposed to be cheered in this story.

Natalya vs. Naomi vs. Brie Bella

The winner gets AJ at Night of Champions. AJ comes out for commentary and Natalya gets a quick rollup for two on Naomi. Brie hits her X-Factor for two on Naomi as well as AJ talks about how worthless the Total Divas are. Naomi tries a sunset flip on Brie but Natalya sends the Bella to the floor. The Sharpshooter is countered into a small package for two but Natalya catches Brie coming off the top with a cross body. Naomi hits the Rear View on Natalya but AJ comes in for the DQ at 1:48. Fourway for the title I guess.

The Total Divas beat AJ down and leave her laying.

Los Matadores are still coming.

Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Since RVD hasn’t beaten Sandow enough times already. Sandow pounds away in the corner and hooks a quick chinlock. More stomping ensues until Van Dam comes back with some kicks to the face. Cue Del Rio for a distraction, allowing Damien to knock Rob to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Rob fighting out of a chinlock, only to be put right back in the same hold. Rob fights up again but gets caught in an Edge-O-Matic for two. The Russian legsweep and Wind-Up Elbow get the same and it’s off to a double chicken wing. Rob fights up again and kicks Sandow down before getting two off Rolling Thunder. Damien gets snapped across the top rope and the Five Star gets the pin at 10:06. Del Rio never did anything.

Rating: D+. I’m tempted to just skip Sandow’s matches from now on. I haven’t thought he could win a singles match in weeks and there was no reason to assume he was going to do so here either. I believe his last singles win was in June, but we’re supposed to buy him as a world title contender. Hopefully he loses the case or something soon.

Stephanie makes the obvious fatal fourway for the title shot at the PPV.

We recap tonight’s show.

Cody is escorted from the building by security and admits that Orton was the better man. He rants about how much the McMahons have hated the Rhodes over the years and walks away.

The roster comes out to watch the main event again.

Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show

Big Show doesn’t want to do this so Bryan goes after him, only to be shoved down. Bryan comes right back at him again with Big Show shouting don’t make him do this. Show throws him to the floor with Big Show saying calm down. Bryan comes back in again and takes Show down with some kicks, only to have Big Show LAUNCH him off in a kickout. The running dropkick in the corner has Big Show staggered but Bryan charges into a superkick. There are the chops to Bryan’s chest and a hard slam for good measure.

Show tells Daniel to stop fighting but Bryan keeps coming at him. Bryan dropkicks the knee out and fires off the kicks. A short DDT gets two but Big Show powers out again. Bryan goes up but dives into a shoulder to the ribs. Show loads up the WMD but starts to walk away. This draws out HHH and the Shield with the Game saying get back in the ring right now. Show keeps going as Shield gets in and beats Bryan down for the DQ at 5:56.

Rating: C-. This was fine but as usual there’s only so much you can do with Bryan against a guy this size. The match wasn’t all that bad and Bryan did what he could, but this was all about the story instead of the match. There’s nothing wrong with that, but on a night with some pretty lame wrestling we needed more than this.

Post match Big Show is about to cry again when HHH says knock Bryan out. Show loads up the punch but rolls to the floor instead. Stephanie meets him in the aisle and says think about his family which sends Big Show back inside. HHH tells him to knock Bryan out again and after showing off his Knucklehead level acting chops, Big Show knocks Bryan out. This would be the sixth consecutive show ending with Daniel Bryan laid out since he won the WWE Championship. Show leaves but here’s Orton to stand over Bryan to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was exhausting. For one thing it was the return of the WWE App as the announcers spent a long time explaining how great it was and how much we needed to download it. The match quality was pretty horrible other than the Orton match and the main event but that’s to be expected anymore. This is another example of how the show would be on fire if these were two hour shows but at three hours, the show is just extra warm.

Results

The Miz b. Fandango – Figure Four

Ryback b. Dolph Ziggler – Shell Shock

Prime Time Players b. 3MB – Clash of the Titus to Mahal

Randy Orton b. Cody Rhodes – RKO

Natalya vs. Brie Bella vs. Naomi went to a no contest when AJ Lee interfered

Rob Van Dam b. Damien Sandow – Five Star Frog Splash

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

ECW on TNN
Date: February 25, 2000
Location: The Rave, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 2,250
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re getting closer to the Living Dangerously PPV and I don’t think anything has been announced for the show. There’s also no announcement made yet on the future of the TV Title other than there will be a new champion. We’ve got three episodes left before the show so maybe we’ll hear some matches announced tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with Cyrus in the ring and the fans chanting RVD. He talks about how the network can’t have the TV Title on the shelf for twelve weeks, and here are Corino, Rhyno and Jack Victory. Tonight Cyrus gets to appoint a new TV Champion which will be…..Rhyno, the last man to be in the ring with Van Dam. Cyrus tells Paul Heyman to bring out the title and a cup of coffee but we need to get the way too long intro out of the way as Heyman comes to the ring.

Heyman is in the ring but Cyrus wants his coffee. Paul is clutching the TV Title belt to his chest as Cyrus berates him for not wanting to sell RVD out. He says Heyman is going to bend over for the network here on TNN but Heyman doesn’t seem interested. Heyman yells at Cyrus and finally hits him in the head with the belt. Rhyno Gores Heyman down and the beating is on until Sandman’s music hits. Naturally it takes forever for him to get to the ring and just as naturally the heels don’t do anything else to Heyman in the meantime.

PPV ad.

Post break and Sandman is STILL in the crowd. After about three minutes (literally) he’s in the ring and we’re ready for our first match.

Sandman vs. Rhyno

Oh wait we have to have Corino and Victory get in cheap shots so Sandman can swing his cane. Sandman and Rhyno head to the aisle and up by the stage with Sandy in control. Here’s a ladder into the ring but Sandman stops to get a table, allowing Rhyno to get in a cheap shot. Sandman sends him into the ladder, allowing him to bring in the table. A slingshot hilo onto the ladder crushes Rhyno and a top rope rana (the Heinekenrana) puts Rhyno down again. Cue Tajiri to spray green mist, allowing Rhyno to hit the Gore through the table for a pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling and that’s all I’ll say about this nonsense.

Post whatever that was, Super Crazy comes out for the save.

We get a highlight package of that whole thing which has taken up nearly half the show.

Gertner starts his limerick but Joey cuts him off to talk about Rhyno claiming to break Rob’s leg. He doesn’t have much to say about it but at least he cut off the funny stuff.

Doring and Roadkill run into the Dupps in the back. Somehow we get a loser leaves town match booked in about 20 seconds.

Dupps vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring

The Dupps (Bo and Jack) are as low brow “comedy” as you can get with the duo playing REALLY stupid country stereotypes. The Dupps run Doring over to start but Roadkill comes in with a springboard double clothesline followed by a double splash in the corner. A wheelbarrow slam/top rope legdrop combination end Jack Dupp to get rid of this stupid team in about a minute and a half.

Website and house show ads. Apparently Tommy Dreamer and Francine will be at some mall. No city or anything is given, but they will be there.

Here’s Tommy Dreamer with something to say. He does a Scott Hall survey with ECW winning the poll. Dreamer cuts out the nonsense and asks Raven to come out here to finish things. Instead he gets Francine who understands that Dreamer is trying to protect her. She’s seen the tape though and Raven DDT’ed her by mistake. Naturally the fans want puppies. Francine rants about what she’s done in ECW, including guiding Dreamer to a tag title. This is supposed to be a burning line for some reason.

We get a clip of Raven accidentally knocking Francine out cold and here are the Impact Players. Dreamer insults Dawn Marie and suggests she just take her top off before challenging the Players to a handicap match. Storm says they’ll put up the titles if Dreamer can find a partner. Why he’d do that is anyone’s guess but somehow it turns into Francine naming Raven as Dreamer’s partner.

Tag Titles: Impact Players vs. Tommy Dreamer/Raven

Tommy gets beaten down for a bit until Raven comes out in dress pants and a turtleneck of all things. Storm accidentally superkicks Credible but Justin makes the save off the Even Flow. Dreamer breaks up a pin off That’s Incredible to Raven as it’s already broken down. It’s one of those brawls in the crowd where you can’t see any of the brawling between Dreamer and Credible as we have Storm and Raven slugging it out in the ring.

A low blow stops Raven as the other two are way at the other end of the building. Raven does the drop toehold onto the chair and here’s Dreamer at ringside to break the barricade apart. Actually it’s a row of seats in the ring and a double drop toehold sends the champions into the chairs. The Players are sent to the floor but Storm gets back in to set up a table. Justin and Raven head to the floor and Dreamer hits a Death Valley Driver on Storm through the table for two with Dawn Marie making the save.

Cue the girl fight as the freaking Sinister Minister comes out because we aren’t overbooking this nonsense enough. Raven accidentally throws powder in Dreamer’s eyes, causing Tommy to DDT Francine (the chick with long hair, as opposed to the champions who have one head of short hair between them). Dreamer loads up a DDT on Storm but gets blasted by a title belt for two. A top rope spinwheel kick from Storm and a spike tombstone on a chair is enough to finish Tommy.

Rating: D. And most of that is because of Dawn’s outfit. I’m tempted to start calling these the two man titles because there’s no tagging at all in these matches. Also, can we PLEASE find a story other than Dreamer hates Raven? It’s literally been the SAME IDEA since this show debuted.

The Sinister Minister sits in a bunch of trash and talks about fire before laughing a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: Trombone. You think I’m wasting a regular rating on something like this? This show had nothing to do with wrestling and I don’t think they have any idea what it’s supposed to be. The Heyman/Network stuff makes sense, but what is it supposed to lead to? The Sandman standing up for ECW? More non-wrestling, as Sandman is embarrassing in the ring. It says a lot when this is making Nitro in 2000 look great by comparison. Again, not a wrestling show at all.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 26, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re in a good place in WWE right now with the big story on top and a lot of other good things going on underneath. Tonight needs to be the night that Bryan makes his first stab at the new Corporation after being laid out to end the last three shows. He’s still on fire, but people are only going to cheer a perennial loser for so long. It should also be interesting to see how many people watch this show with Cena not being there. Let’s get to it.

We open with Shield standing at ringside and looking up at the stage. HHH comes out to a face pop and talks about how this is the beginning of a new era. We get a clip from the end of Summerslam with Orton winning the title thanks to the Game. HHH says that was just business before we see a clip of the end of last week’s show. Now that was personal because Bryan insulted Stephanie and the rest of HHH’s family. HHH however is willing to be a bigger man due to the ratings and social media scores being up. In short, business is booming and it’s due to the new face of the WWE: Randy Orton.

Cue Orton to the ring for praise from HHH for bringing new life to the title. HHH has a gift for the new champion: a Cadillac Escalade. Oh I think we all know where this is going. Orton goes to look at the car but here’s Bryan before he gets too far. Bryan says that’s a sweet ride and way nicer than his Honda Fit. It’s well deserved too because Orton worked so hard for the WWE Championship. Bryan thanks all of the fans because he isn’t the biggest or the strongest or the prettiest (“That would be Twinkle Toes Orton”).

They’ve all supported him through everything and he’s grateful, but he also has to thank John Cena for giving him the chance at Summerslam. Lastly Bryan wants to thank HHH for ending the charade and showing his true colors at Summerslam. His view of what was best for business is as narrow minded as Vince McMahon’s. The rebel in the leather jacket is now another corporate suit who thumbs his nose at all the fans. Orton says think about who you’re talking to so Bryan says let’s hear it for the face of the WWE. At Night of Champions, the face is going to be rearranged, just like HHH’s vision for the future of the company.

HHH says that’s a cute fantasy and, I kid you not, sings When You Wish Upon a Star. Unfortunately for Bryan it doesn’t work that way in the real world. In the real world, Orton is an A+ and Bryan is just a B. As for tonight, Bryan can face Seth Rollins. If he beats Seth, then he can face Dean Ambrose. If he beats Dean, he can also face Roman Reigns. I can totally dig Shield as the personal enforcers of the new regime.

We look at the brawl last week between Axel and Punk. They fight for the Intercontinental Title tonight, but the fans get to pick the stipulations. You can pick Heyman as guest referee, Heyman banned from ringside or Punk gets to face Heyman if he wins. There’s no mention of this being a title match, despite it being called that on Smackdown.

Cody Rhodes vs. Fandango

Sandow is on commentary. Fandango tries to take him down to start but gets caught by a running elbow to the face. A front suplex puts Fandango on the apron but he kicks Cody in the face. Cue Fandango’s music with Miz and some girl dancing, allowing Cody to roll up Fandango for the pin at 1:08.

Sandow jumps Cody and Miz comes out for a brawl until Brad Maddox turns into a 60 year old bald black man and makes a tag match.

Damien Sandow/Fandango vs. The Miz/Cody Rhodes

Back with Sandow getting two on Cody before bringing in Fandango for some gyrating shots. Apparently Miz’s dance partner was Rosa Mendes. Back to Sandow for the Russian legsweep and the Wind-Up elbow for two. Cody finally gets in a shot and brings in Miz off the hot tag. Miz cleans house as Fandango walks out. Cody trips up Sandow, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin on Sandow at 2:56.

Matadores vignette. It’s so cheesy it might work.

Josh Matthews asks Christian about the HHH era. Christian says he survived the McMahon-Helmsley Era and is a bit hesitant to answer that question. Randy Orton pops in and says he’s going to beat Orton tonight. Christian says HHH likes to play with hammers and apparently he’s found a new tool.

If you get some App, you can see what Heyman thinks about the stipulations the fans can pick.

Punk wants to get his hands on Heyman and suggests the fans vote for choice #3.

Heyman doesn’t like the idea of there being a vote. If they’re going to show a segment with Heyman complaining, what was the point of the video on the App? Axel says Heyman shouldn’t be worried because Punk can’t outwrestle him. It’s better than perfect.

Curtis Axel vs. CM Punk

It’s non-title despite Axel challenging him for a title match on Smackdown and Punk saying “I accept.” The third option of Heyman having to face Punk if Axel loses wins with 81% of the vote. Punk goes right after Axel and grabs a headlock but can’t hit the GTS. Axel bails to the floor so Punk charges up the ramp at Heyman, allowing Curtis to get in a cheap shot. Back in and Punk escapes a chinlock and gets two off the knee in the corner. Axel rolls to the floor before the Macho Elbow can be launched but Punk hits the suicide dive as we take a break.

Back with Axel hitting a clothesline to the back of the head for two as Heyman is looking more confident. Punk comes back with kicks to the legs and back followed by a middle rope cross body for two. Axel snaps off a slingshot belly to back suplex for two followed by a snap Saito suplex for the same. Punk grabs a neckbreaker and the Macho Elbow gets two. The GTS is countered into a McGillicutter for another two count but the second attempt at the GTS is good for the pin at 10:52.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but the ending shouldn’t surprise anyone. It’s not like Axel is allowed to win non-title matches and there was no way he was going to win a match over Punk without shenanigans. Still though, not a terrible match or anything but it was part of a story instead of a match.

Post match Heyman won’t get in the ring until referees and security drag him to the gallows. Heyman blames Brock for the whole thing as Punk throws him inside. Naturally Axel makes the save with a low blow before Heyman gets killed. Heyman pulls out handcuffs to bind Punk’s hands behind his back, allowing Heyman to slap Punk around. He shouts at Punk to fight him so Punk gets up and kicks Axel in the head. Punk kicks Heyman down and gets in some shots to the back but Curtis comes in with a chair for the save.

Now Curtis brings in a kendo stick for Heyman to use. Punk: “MAKE IT COUNT!” Heyman shouts that he fathered Punk and that Punk was everything to him as he beats Punk down with the stick. Axel throws Punk onto the announce table and shouts that Punk deserves this before Heyman pounds away with the stick even more. Heyman shouts that he loved Punk and Punk broke his heart. Heyman is distraught as the fans chant something that sounds like boring. Screw them if that’s what they were chanting because the emotion here was great.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

JoJo from Total Divas is the ring announcer and we have the rest of the cast at ringside. Brie gets in a few shots, only to be quickly caught in a Sharpshooter. Nikki and Eva Marie distract the referee, triggering a big brawl. Brie hits a quick X Factor for the pin at 1:40.

Post match AJ comes out to make fun of Total Divas before calling the girls interchangeable and useless. They’re on reality TV because they aren’t good enough to be actresses or talented enough to be champions. AJ goes on about how the girls from the show are worthless and aren’t even worthy of lacing up her Chuck Taylors and that is reality. If you’ve watched Total Divas, it’s almost impossible to cheer any of the cast members as they’re anywhere between evil, stupid, liars, money hungry or the pond scum of the earth.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rob Van Dam

Ricardo has an RVD shirt on as the announcers talk about Edward Snowden for some reason. Apparently Del Rio’s thing now is to have Mexican flags in the corners of the ring. RVD kicks him to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Del Rio working on the ribs and getting two off a German suplex. The champion goes to the middle rope but jumps into a kick to the face, setting up Rolling Thunder for two.

The split legged moonsault gets two more and there’s the springboard kick to the chest. Rob gets crotched on top to break up the Five Star, allowing Del Rio to hit the enziguri for two. Ricardo gets on the announce table to cheer, distracting Del Rio long enough to allow Rob to get a quick rollup for the pin at 8:30.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do much for me which is partially due to the time. Also, I can’t stand the idea of having the champion lose a match basically clean to set up another title shot down the line. It doesn’t make anyone look strong and devalues the title even more. Have Van Dam pin ANYONE else and get the title shot, then have Alberto vanquish the latest challenger. It builds up the title and keeps the champion strong, but why would you want to do that?

We see Cena saying he has to have surgery last week and get some shots of his arm after the operation.

Ryback doesn’t like being called a bully so he grabs Josh Matthews by the face and shoves him to the ground. He says he found a way to shut Josh up.

We look at the Punk/Heyman/Axel stuff for the third time tonight.

Heyman, with blood red eyes, says Punk is like a petulant child who has to be beaten over and over until he learns his lesson. Paul says he feels like a man and now his prodigal son will learn to never come up against him.

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Non-title again. Christian grabs a quick rollup for two but gets taken down by a shoulder block. A quick attempt at the Elevated DDT is countered with a backdrop to the floor followed by the baseball slide. Back in and a reverse DDT puts Orton down, only to have him dropkick Christian off the top. Orton pounds on Christian before draping him over the top rope.

A knee lift puts Christian on the floor before we hit the chinlock for a bit. Christian tries a comeback but gets taken down by a headbutt and it’s back to the chinlock. Christian fights up again and they slug it out with Orton running into an elbow in the corner. In a scary looking spot, Christian goes to the middle rope for a tornado DDT but gets shoved down, bouncing off the apron on the way to the floor.

Back with Orton holding a chinlock before hitting a nice superplex for no cover. Christian grabs a quick small package for two but gets taken down by Orton’s clotheslines. The RKO doesn’t work and Christian gets a quick high cross body for two. Christian’s middle rope dropkick is countered into a jackknife cover for two, only to have Christian counter into a sunset flip for the same.

The Elevated DDT is countered again but Christian can’t hook the Killswitch. A tornado DDT gets two but Orton comes back with the Elevated DDT for two. The RKO doesn’t work and the spear connects for a very close two. The Killswitch is countered and Orton gets in a thumb to the eye, setting up the RKO for the pin at 15:20.

Rating: B-. Good match as usual between these two with things getting much better after the break. Christian is a solid hand to have out there as he can get a good match out of almost anyone. That’s an invaluable thing to have on the roster as Christian doesn’t need a world title to be over, yet the fans are going to cheer for him anyway.

Post match Bryan pops up on screen and says that was an A+ match (B- actually). He says that was such a nice car that HHH gave Orton earlier, but when Orton loses at Night of Champions, will Bryan be the new face of the WWE? Bryan steps to the side to show the word YES spraypainted all over the car. Cole: “Now it’s a YESCalade!”

Back with HHH, Orton and Brad looking at the car. For some reason Brad tells them that the locker room thinks this is hilarious. HHH says that the car and the belt are his personal property. Maddox is told to go to the stage to watch what happens to Bryan tonight. If anyone interferes tonight, they’re fired.

Titus O’Neil vs. Jack Swagger

Colter says if Mrs. Young and Mrs. O’Neil had been responsible, we wouldn’t be looking at an inferior tag team. Swagger takes him into the corner to start and pounds away before taking Titus down with a knee to the ribs. A DDT on the leg keeps Titus down but O’Neil comes back with a bunch of shoulder blocks and a fallaway slam. A chop block sets up the Patriot Lock but Titus quickly kicks him off. Jack’s rollup in the corner with feet on the ropes is broken up by Young, allowing Titus to hit a release spinebuster for the pin at 3:18.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as this feud continues to be completely one sided. The Colter promos are working but they’re being wasted when his guys keep losing every match they have. Then again you can’t have Young or his partner lose because some idiotic group would say they’re punishing him for being gay, because said group will have no idea how wrestling works.

We get a video from WWE.com with the Wyatt Family talking about Sister Abigail, who apparently inspired Bray Wyatt to become what he is today.

We recap the car stuff tonight.

Punk has refused medical attention and comes in to see Brad Maddox. He DEMANDS a match with Paul Heyman but Maddox makes it a handicap elimination match against Heyman and Axel at Night of Champions. If Heyman tries to get out of it, he’s gone. Punk says if Heyman does get out of this, we’ll never see Maddox again.

Daniel Bryan vs. Shield

Under gauntlet rules with Rollins getting the first crack at Goatman. The roster is on the stage to watch and Big Show has nothing to say about his match last week. Ziggler doesn’t say anything either and Miz stops himself before going too far with the criticism. Bryan fires off kicks to start and hooks a surfboard while also cranking on the neck. More kicks to the chest have Rollins in trouble and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor. Ambrose and Reigns close in on Bryan, allowing Rollins to drive Bryan into the barricade for control.

Rollins stomps away but Bryan fires off right hands out of the corner. Bryan moonsaults over him to set up the running clothesline and more kicks to the chest. Rollins ducks the big one to the chest and rolls to the apron for a Stunner on the top rope. Bryan ducks the springboard knee and catches Seth in a half crab but he’s too close to the ropes. Rollins rolls to the floor and the FLYING GOAT sends him over the announce table as we take a break.

Back with Rollins holding a chinlock before hitting a running forearm in the corner. He slaps Bryan in the face a few times and tells Bryan to stay down while doing the finger point. Seth goes to the other corner but Bryan charges at him with the running dropkick. Bryan comes back with the kicks and sits on a sunset flip for two. They trade some nice near falls but Seth takes his head off with a jumping enziguri.

An inverted Impaler gets two and Seth loads up a superplex, only to get crotched on the top. Bryan busts out a release German superplex with Rollins landing on his face. The running knee to the head (missed by the camera) gets the pin at 12:00. Ambrose immediately runs in to start pounding away but the YES Lock has Dean in trouble, only to have Reigns make the save at 12:30. Reigns’ match starts but Bryan catches him in a YES Lock right off the bat, only to have Ambrose and Rollins come in for the no contest at about 13:00 total.

Rating: B-. We’ll mostly ignore the last two thirds as they weren’t matches at all. That being said, the Rollins vs. Bryan stuff was really good other than the bad camera work. You can’t have Bryan beat Shield on his own of course and thankfully they didn’t have Ambrose tap out. It can be that simple sometimes but most of the time the champion has to lose.

Post match Shield destroys Bryan with the Triple Bomb as HHH comes out to make sure no one helps Daniel. Cue Orton for the RKO to end the show. This would be four straight shows where our final image is Daniel Bryan laid out.

Overall Rating: B+. Questionable ending aside, I really liked tonight’s show as it was all about the top two stories. The stuff filling in the gaps wasn’t bad either and it made for an entertaining episode. Nothing was overly boring on here and it set up some stuff for the future. I wasn’t wild on the way some of the matches ended, but at least we got some of the results we needed. Really strong show this week.

Results

Cody Rhodes b. Fandango – Rollup

The Miz/Cody Rhodes b. Damien Sandow/Fandango – Skull Crushing Finale to Sandow

CM Punk b. Curtis Axel – GTS

Brie Bella b. Natalya – Bella Buster

Rob Van Dam b. Alberto Del Rio – Rollup

Randy Orton b. Christian – RKO

Titus O’Neil b. Jack Swagger – Release Spinebuster

Daniel Bryan vs. Shield went to a no contest

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re finally at Summerslam and the show looks great. It’s a two match show but those two matches have the potential to be masterpieces. Tonight’s main events are John Cena defending the Raw Title against Daniel Bryan and the Best vs. the Beast in CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar. The rest of the card is hit or miss but Bray Wyatt vs. Kane in a Ring of Fire match has potential. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Dean is defending and Rob won the title shot in a battle royal on Raw. Feeling out process to start with Dean running Rob down. Ambrose does the finger point while shouting US Champion in a cute bit before taking Rob down with a hammerlock. Back up and Rob hits a quick spin kick to put Dean down and there’s the real finger point. Ambrose comes back with chops and punches in the corner as the slow start continues. Dean cranks on the neck and the fans are split down the middle.

A running dropkick against the ropes gets two on Van Dam and it’s off to the chinlock. They get back up and Dean avoids a charge in the corner but Rob comes back with a spinning cross body out of the corner for two. A kick look to set up the Five Star but here are Rollins and Reigns for a distraction but not a DQ. This brings out Big Show and Henry for backup as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose still in control with shots to the chest and a cross face chicken wing. An ECW chant starts up as Ambrose transitions into a sleeper. Rob is sent to the floor but the giants block Shield from interfering. Dean goes out to stare as well but gets kicked down by Van Dam, allowing Rob to put him on the barricade for the spin kick from the apron.

Back in and Rob hits a top rope front flip attack for a close two. Reigns trips Rob to break up Rolling Thunder but Rob still gets two off a cradle. A spinebuster gets two for Dean but a top rope backsplash misses. Rob loads up the Five Star but has to jump at Rollins instead. Dean get a very close two off a rollup but Rob comes back with a kick to the face. Now Rolling Thunder connects and there’s the Five Star but Reigns comes in for the DQ at 14:08. So what did Show and Henry do here exactly?

Rating: B-. This was getting very good until the ending. Again what was the point in Henry and Big Show being out there if they were just going to stand around and do nothing? Dean got to hang in there against Rob but it doesn’t look as good without the win. Good opener though and the fans were WAY into it.

The opening video focuses on the main events and not much more.

JoJo from Total Divas sings the national anthem. She’s not bad.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

Wyatt and his Family debuted a few weeks ago and attacked Kane. Tonight the ring is surrounded by fire to prevent interference but you win by pin/submission. This is Bray’s in ring debut. Kane pounds him into the corner to start and clotheslines him down, sending the flames shooting into the air. The Family tries to get closer to the ring and there goes the fire again. Nice touch. Bray charges right at Kane and pounds away but can’t hit a suplex.

Kane suplexes him down instead, sending the fire up again. Bray avoids the low dropkick but misses a charge, sending himself into the ropes and near the flames. Wyatt crushes him in the corner with a splash and mostly misses a cross body. They’re lucky that the flames are covering up a lot of these misses. Bray slugs his way out of a chokeslam but Kane “hits” a big boot. Are the flames really messing them up that badly? That’s like three moves that have mostly missed. Kane side slams him down for no cover but Bray gets in a shot to take Kane down.

Wyatt asks for a weapon but as Harper loads up a kendo stick the flames go up, catching the stick on fire. Firemen put it out so Rowan steals the extinguisher, but it has no effect. There’s the chokeslam to Wyatt but Kane hits a second one for revenge. He calls for the tombstone but the Family puts a blanket over the flames, allowing the monsters to come in and beat Kane down. There’s no DQ though so this is all legal. Kane is destroyed and Sister Abigail is good for the pin at 7:49.

Rating: D+. This was disappointing. The visuals were cool but just putting a blanket over the flames was a pretty lame way to have the monsters get inside. I was expecting something a bit more supernatural instead of fire safety tips with the Wyatt Family. Also what was up with those botches?

Post match Bray sits in his chair with his hat on as the Family lays Kane’s head on the steps. They crush his head with the top part as Bray lights the lantern to a HUGE pop. The Wyatts take Kane with them.

The expert panel of Booker T, Shawn Michaels and Vickie Guerrero talk about the match a bit.

We get part of a Heyman promo from the pre show as the fire stuff is removed. Punk vs. Lesnar is now No DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

They used to be partners but Sandow cheated Cody out of the MITB case last month, causing Cody to throw the case in the Gulf of Mexico. Sandow talks about great literary pairs throughout history and says there was always a leader and a follower. Cody was the sidekick of the Rhodes Scholars and tonight he’s being sent back to the carnival his family came from. Cody has shaved his mustache and you can find out why on Friday on the Youtube channel. SERIOUSLY? They think people are going to check that out?

They start fast with Cody in control until Sandow takes him out to the floor. Cody is rammed back first into the apron and Sandow fires off forearms to the spine. A quick suplex gets two and it’s off to a knee in Cody’s back. Cross Rhodes is quickly countered but the legsweep and Wind-Up elbow get two for Sandow. Damien busts out Edge’s old Edgecator submission (it’s like a Sharpshooter but Damien leans forward on the legs instead of turning over and pulling) but it’s quickly broken up.

Back up and Cody catches him on the top rope in a Muscle Buster of all things for two. Damien backdrops him to the apron but Cody comes back in with a nice springboard missile dropkick. The Disaster Kick misses and Sandow hits his flip neckbreaker for two. Cody falls down on Sandow’s sunset flip for two before hitting the Disaster Kick for another near fall. Damien avoids a charge into the post for two more but Cody grabs Cross Rhodes out of nowhere for the pin at 6:37.

Rating: C. This was better than I was expecting and I like that they’re pushing Cody stronger. He had so much potential when he was Intercontinental Champion but it just fell apart since them. At the same time though, Sandow continues his downward spiral into nothingness, meaning he’ll be world champion in a few months more than likely. Maybe we’ll get a rematch for the case next month.

Video recap of Christian’s career which is pretty cool stuff.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Christian won a three way to get the shot and has pinned Del Rio twice in the last few weeks. Alberto makes Lillian do his intro in Spanish in a nice touch. Christian quickly sends Del Rio out to the floor but misses a baseball slide. Back in and Del Rio escapes a top rope rana attempt and hits an enziguri to send Christian into the Tree of Woe. Alberto fires off kicks to the chest and a running one somewhere near the shoulder.

Del Rio sends the shoulder into the barricade, meaning he has his psychology boots on tonight. Alberto sends Christian crashing down to the mat and hits a dropkick to the shoulder. King: “That’ll shake your maracas.” A top rope stomp to the shoulder gets two but Christian avoids a running crotch attack in the ropes to send the champion to the floor. Christian hits a BIG dive off the top to take Del Rio down again and Christian pounds away back inside.

Del Rio misses a top rope enziguri and takes a high cross body for two. Alberto begs for a breather but suckers Christian in for a headbutt to the ribs. Christian flips out of a belly to back but can’t hit the Killswitch. The sunset flip out of the corner is countered into the Backstabber (the knees clearly slid off to the side and never hit the back) for two. A rollup gets two for Christian but he gets caught by the corner enziguri for another near fall. This is MUCH better than I was expecting coming in.

The sunset flip out of the corner is blocked by Alberto but Christian hits a running enziguri of his own. A top rope hurricanrana gets a VERY close two for the challenger as the fans are way into these near falls. The spear is countered by a fast dropkick for two for the champion and the low superkick gets the same. Del Rio lowers his knee pad but another shot to the head is countered into a rollup for two. There’s the spear but Christian’s arm gives out (THANK YOU! Edge did the same spot in 2001 but pinned Lance Storm like it was nothing). Del Rio grabs the armbreaker out of nowhere and Christian TAPS at 12:34.

Rating: B+. I REALLY liked this match but the 50/50 booking is so stupid. Christian beat Del Rio twice clean in a few weeks but now Del Rio gets a win so we’re supposed to be impressed? It doesn’t work that way no matter what WWE thinks. Enough of the bad stuff though as this was a great match with both guys looking awesome out there. The crowd was totally into it and the ending was a surprise. Really good stuff here.

Post match Del Rio says he represents the Latinos and that he’s the world champion. This was a tease of a cash in but nothing happened.

Axxess stuff, including Maria Menunos in a Divas tag match.

Miz (the host of this show, in his first appearance here tonight an hour in) is in the back with Menunos. Not much is said until Fandango and Summer Rae pop in. A dance off begins and that’s about it.

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

This is the Total Divas match with Nikki, Eva Marie and the Funkadactyls in the corner. Feeling out process until we get to the catfight stuff, culminating in Brie having to bail from a Sharpshooter attempt. Eva and Nikki pull the ring skirt down to send Natalya to the floor, allowing Brie to take over. The fans chant for JBL and then Lawler as they completely turn on the match. Brie cranks on Nattie’s arm as the fans want tables.

After a faceplant it’s right back to the hold as this match is dragging three minutes in. Natalya makes a quick comeback and puts on the Sharpshooter but Brie kicks away and no sells the pain. The girls get in a brawl on the floor and we’re in the third use of the SAME hold. Someone get Fit Finlay back in this company immediately. The fans are chanting for Ryder as Natayla hits an Alabama Slam and the Sharpshooter gets the tap out from Brie at 5:20.

Rating: F. This was HORRIBLE with both girls looking bad. The Divas are horrid right now other than AJ and occasionally Layla but these reality “stars” are getting TV time because people like to see them argue and be insecure. Natalya is good in the ring but she can’t work a miracle with a model out there. Horrid match and they need to win the crowd back immediately.

Ryback torments a guy at catering over a bowl of soup. I’m sure the leather vest isn’t inspired by Bully Ray whatsoever. “Feed me moron.”

We recap Punk vs. Lesnar which is really about Punk vs. Heyman. Punk turned face around Payback and asked Heyman not to accompany him to ringside anymore. Soon after that Lesnar returned and attacked Punk. Heyman swore that he had nothing to do with it but he turned on Punk at MITB, costing Punk the briefcase. Punk swore revenge on both of them, starting with Lesnar tonight. This is a money feud for multiple reasons, but the biggest being that’s based on HATRED. Punk is furious at Heyman and wants his revenge. His method of getting it? In a professional wrestling match of course. So simple yet so effective.

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

The tagline for this match is perfect: the Best vs. the Beast. It’s also No DQ. I always forget how scary of a man Brock Lesnar is until he comes to the ring. Lesnar immediately drives him into the corner and no sells forearms to the head. Brock LAUNCHES him into the other corner and stomps Punk down before no selling knees to the ribs. Punk is thrown around again and rammed into another corner with raw power.

Lesnar brags a bit too much and Punk gets in a kick to the head and a pair of knees to the face to send Brock to the floor. The suicide dive takes Lesnar down and the fans go NUTS. Punk loads up the steps but Brock rams into them to knock Punk down. Brock fires off knees to the ribs but Punk posts him for a breather. A top rope dive puts Brock down again as Punk is giving this all he has. Punk dives off the announce table with a clothesline and Brock is in trouble.

CM makes the mistake of going after Heyman though and Brock gets in a shot to take over. Brock tosses Punk over the announce table in an amazing throw for an even better crash. Since he threw Punk over the table once, Lesnar has to throw him over the other side for good measure. An over head belly to belly sends Punk down onto the concrete and Punk is barely moving. Back in and Brock drives Punk into the corner with shoulders and puts on a bearhug.

Punk gets in some forearms to escape but a knee to the ribs puts him right back down. Back to the bearhug and we get a shot of the evil look on Heyman’s face. Punk comes back again with shots to the head but his high cross body is caught in a fallaway slam. A backbreaker sets up a suplex for three straight near falls. Off to a chinlock but Punk BITES THE EAR to get some separation. More shots to the head stagger Brock and a top rope knee to the chest knocks him into the corner.

Two more running knees to the corner have Brock reeling but Brock catches the third in a fireman’s carry. Punk drops behind Lesnar and hits a high kick, setting up the Macho Elbow (didn’t look good) for two. The GTS and F5 are countered into another high kick but the GTS is countered into the kimura. Punk spins out and hooks a cross armbreaker (GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT) and then a triangle choke of all things.

Brock raises his hand but powerbombs Punk down….but the hold isn’t broken! The hand is still in the air but Brock lifts Punk into the air. Punk fires off elbows to the head, only to be caught in a running powerbomb to kill Punk dead. Lesnar can’t follow up though and both guys are down. A delayed cover gets two on Punk as Heyman is having a heart attack. Lesnar hits Three Amigos of all things for two before very slowly grabbing a chair. Punk gets up and dives onto Lesnar but he mostly hit chair.

Now it’s Punk with the chair and a few shots send Brock back inside. Lesnar gets the chair away but Punk goes low to stop Brock’s chair shot. Punk takes the chair up top and drops an elbow (kind of) onto Brock for a closer two. More chair shots to the back have Lesnar screaming in pain but Heyman takes the chair from Punk’s hands. Lesnar is up AGAIN but Punk grabs Heyman’s tie to escape the F5.

The GTS connects but Heyman comes in to break up the pin. Punk gets a big smile on his face as there’s no Brock to save Heyman, but the case winds up in the F5, which Punk counters into a faceplant for a VERY close two. The Anaconda Vice goes on but Heyman tries to come in with a chair, only to have Punk stand on the chair to block it.

Heyman slaps at Punk’s leg in a funny bit but gets caught by the neck. A right hand puts Heyman down and now he’s in the Vice but Lesnar is back up. He crushes Punk with the chair and hits him even harder the second time. A third shot knocks Punk silly and the F5 onto the chair ends this at 25:20.

Rating: A+. The storytelling and psychology alone made this a great match. I loved the idea that Punk kept taking the weapons away from Lesnar but once Brock got in the first chair shot the match was over. Punk showed he was smarter leading up to the match but his hatred for Heyman cost him in the end when he went on emotion instead of intelligence.

The action in this was incredible as well as it felt like a fight instead of a match, which is the right idea. If nothing else, this shows how bad of an idea the HHH feud was. Punk and Cena have both blown away all of the HHH matches with Lesnar by miles and miles, but we got a year of HHH and a month each of the other guys so far. Such is life in the WWE. Outstanding match here though.

We get a clip from Axxess where a fan took a splash from Mark Henry for three tickets to Summerslam.

Kaitlyn/Dolph Ziggler vs. AJ Lee/Big E. Langston

This is just a combination of two feuds which is a fine way to get both of them on the card. The guys start with Ziggler getting caught in a belly to belly suplex and a spinning splash of all things from Langston. Off to an abdominal stretch before AJ gets in a slap to Langston. Dolph comes back with a quick dropkick and it’s off to the girls. Kaitlyn throws AJ around with ease but gets caught with a wicked spinwheel kick to the face. A few neckbreakers put Kaitlyn down and AJ skips around.

Off to a sleeper which doesn’t last long as it’s back to the guys. Ziggler speeds things up and splashes Big E. in the corner. Ten straight elbow drops to set up the jumping elbow get a two count. Langston makes a quick comeback but gets sent shoulder first into the post. AJ grabs Dolph’s leg but Kaitlyn spears her down as Langston runs Dolph over for two. The Big Ending is escaped into the Zig Zag for the pin at 6:48.

Rating: C-. This was fine but it was in the death spot on the card between the two main events. It came off well enough though and the crowd was into it at times. It was a WAY better idea than putting the Total Divas match here which I thought they were going to do. Nothing great but it did its job just fine.

Fandango and Summer Rae cut off Miz again so he lays Fandango out.

Some low level celebrities are here.

The expert panel make their predictions on the main event. Bryan is the favorite.

We recap the main event. Daniel Bryan is on the roll of a lifetime and Cena selected him for the title shot tonight. The idea is simple: Bryan says Cena isn’t a wrestler, Cena says he’s proven everyone that has said that wrong. However there’s a wildcard in all this: HHH, who is the guest referee and will likely be joining Vince to hijack the match because their storyline is SO much more important than anything else.

Raw World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

The fans are almost unanimously behind Bryan here. Cena has a very bad elbow injury coming in and has been out of action for a few weeks. Feeling out process to start with Cena taking him to the mat via a headlock. Bryan easily gets back to his feet and tries a test of strength of all things with Cena taking him down to the mat. He can’t break Bryan’s bridge though and Bryan monkey flips him down. The YES Lock doesn’t work as Cena bails to the floor.

Back in and Cena tries a left arm (the bad arm) headlock but Bryan takes him down again. The double knee stomp surfboard doesn’t work as Cena kicks Bryan away. Daniel goes to the apron and is knocked HARD into the announce table. Cena follows him to the floor but gets whipped into the steps. Bryan tries a suplex off the steps in a spot I’ve never seen before but Cena counters into one of his own to put both guys down. Fans: “YOU STILL SUCK!”

Cena wisely turns it into a brawl and punches Bryan down before hitting a Batista Bomb of all things. We hit the chinlock and HHH hasn’t been a factor yet. Bryan comes back with forearms to the head and kicks to the chest in the corner but HHH yells at him. Lawler: “Don’t gloat goat!” Bryan hits the running clothesline but misses the hard kick to the head. Cena tries his finishing sequence but Bryan kicks him in the head to block the Shuffle. Bryan can’t hook a submission hold and gets caught in the ProtoBomb followed by the Shuffle for no cover.

Bryan flips out of the AA and catches a charging Cena in the chin with a boot. The missile dropkick connects for two and Bryan fires off the kicks to the chest. Now Bryan goes after the bad arm before slapping on the STF of all things. Cena is about to get to the ropes so Bryan pulls him back and hits two German suplexes for two each. Bryan counters the AA into the YES Lock and Cena is in big trouble. Cena counters by getting his head free (wrestling you say?) but gets pulled down into a guillotine choke.

John FINALLY powers out of it but can barely follow up. Bryan charges right at Cena but gets caught in the AA for a close two. That came out of nowhere and had the fans inhaling in unison. Cena goes up but has to knock Bryan down twice before getting caught by a running dropkick. Now Bryan gets up top and superplexes Cena down but stays on top in a cool power move. He sits up onto the top for the Swan Dive but Cena is up at two. John rolls to the floor and blocks the FLYING GOAT with a forearm to the head.

This time the top rope Fameasser connects for two and Cena is getting frustrated. Cena tries the middle rope AA but Bryan fires off about 25 elbows to the head to break it up. Bryan can’t hit a top rope rana so Cena loads up what looks like a Styles Clash but jumps down and drops Bryan o his head in a SCARY looking botch. Bryan looks ok though and Cena rolls into the STF. Bryan rolls over to his side but the hold is still on, basically making it a chinlock with a body scissors.

Daniel rolls out and hooks the YES Lock in the middle of the ring. Cena crawls over (with his arm slapping the mat in what could have been a tap if you stretched a bit) and FINALLY makes a rope. Bryan hits the running dropkick in the corner and makes it a pair for good measure. Cena comes back with a MASSIVE clothesline but he can’t follow up. They slug it out and both hit shoulders at the same time for another double layout.

Now they slap each other out in the middle of the ring and it’s Bryan taking over and moonsaulting out of the corner, but Cena nearly catches him in mid air. He tries a spinebuster but Bryan counters into a DDT and a lot of checking on each other. Bryan tries a high cross (popular move tonight) but Cena catches him in mid air. Bryan counters into the small package they’ve been building up for weeks but it’s only good for two in a GREAT false finish. The big kick to Cena’s head puts the champion down again and a Shining Freaking Wizard GETS THE PIN AND THE TITLE AT 26:58!

Rating: A+. WHAT A BRILLIANT FINISH! They totally fooled us all by having the standard WWE formula playing out but Bryan wins it out of nowhere with a knee to the head. Brilliant move there after a great match to boot. What more can you ask for in the main event of the second biggest show of the year? Excellent stuff and HHH did absolutely nothing at all.

Post match Cena grabs Bryan and turns him around but they shake hands. Cena leaves with no incident and Bryan celebrates but HERE’S ORTON! Bryan is looking at him though and says bring it on. Orton is standing at ringside and turns around. Bryan celebrates and HHH spins him around and Pedigrees him. Orton comes in and hands HHH the case. You know what’s coming.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Seven seconds and Orton wins.

Everyone is shocked to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. There are definitely some bad spots on here but the main events more than make this a great show. The WWE has been on fire for the last few months and this was no exception with some great matches on top of the card and the midcard having some nice surprises with the Smackdown Title match being much better than I was expecting. The ending was what a lot of people were expecting, because screw making a new star since it’s all about the McMahons. Excellent show though and well worth checking out.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Kane – Sister Abigail

Cody Rhodes b. Damien Sandow – Cross Rhodes

Alberto Del Rio b. Christian – Cross Armbreaker

Natalya b. Brie Bella – Sharpshooter

Brock Lesnar b. CM Punk – F5 onto a chair

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn b. AJ Lee/Big E. Langston – Zig Zag to Langston

Daniel Bryan b. John Cena – Shining Wizard

Randy Orton b. Daniel Bryan – Pin after a Pedigree from HHH

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That was AMAZING.  I said they couldn’t pull off a convincing fight but they certainy did and it was incredible.

I was wrong.