Monday Night Raw – February 19, 2007: On The Road. Again.

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 19, 2007
Location: Rabobank Arena, Bakersfield, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with No Way Out and that means we have less than six weeks to go before Wrestlemania XXIII. The main events are set but we still need a bit more of the card to come together. That means we could be in for something good tonight, which will likely not include another appearance from Donald Trump. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a barber’s chair and barber shop pole in the ring (which is thankfully minus any windows). Vince McMahon comes out to say the Battle of the Billionaires is ready on and he can’t believe it. Donald Trump is going to come into his most prized creation, where Vince’s representative is going to beat him. Then McMahon is going to go over and beat Trump up, so that he can tell Trump that it’s time to be bald.

The good thing is that being bald is en vogue right now, so we look at Brittney Spears with her shaved head. Vince talks about the various haircuts he might give Trump, which means we get a McMahon favorite: WACKY PHOTOSHOPPED PICTURES!!! Anyway, Vince wants us to meet his personal representative, so here is Umaga. Armando Alejandro Estrada talks about how Umaga is happy to be Vince’s representative, but Vince isn’t done. Right now, Umaga is going to become…..the Intercontinental Champion!

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

Umaga is challenging and we are joined in progress with Hardy sending Umaga outside. The baseball slide through the ropes staggers Umaga but the slingshot dive is pulled out of the air. That’s escaped as well so Hardy runs the barricade, only to have his dive knocked away with ease.

They head back in where Umaga drops a leg and we hit the nerve hold as Lawler talks about how horrible it is to have your head shaved. Hardy manages to avoid the charge in the corner so Umaga’s head slams into the post. The Whisper in the Wind gets two but Umaga catches him with the Samoan drop. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike to give Umaga the pin and the title.

Rating: C. Hardy was the sacrificial lamb here and that’s all he was supposed to be. They needed to make Umaga look like a bigger deal going into his huge Wrestlemania match so putting him over a popular star like Hardy makes sense. Umaga winning the title is hardly some big upset so go with the right move here and everyone wins. Well maybe not Hardy.

Ric Flair/Carlito vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito and Flair, the latter of whom takes over on Cade’s arm to start. Carlito comes in for the springboard elbow to the face and the running knee lift. A distraction lets Cade hit a Side Effect though and Murdoch comes in to hammer away. The villains take turns stomping away and we hit the neck crank on Carlito.

A back elbow to the face puts him down again but Murdoch misses an elbow. It’s back to Flair for the rapid fire chops and right hands, setting up the chop block. The Figure Four is paused so Flair can punch Cade out of the air, allowing Carlito to come in for a double clothesline to the floor. Flair hits Murdoch low and the Backstabber gives Carlito the pin.

Rating: C-. Just a tag match here as Carlito and Flair are starting the mentor/mentee deal. Granted it might be a bit better if it was anyone but Carlito, though at least they have something going on here. I’m not sure how far this is going to go, but Flair in a midcard role to give Carlito a rub is going to work out well enough.

John Cena and Shawn Michaels are happy they won last night but Shawn’s goal is still to keep Cena safe until Wrestlemania. Violence is teased….but Shawn plugs the new DX DVD instead. Cena counters with the unrated version of the Marine DVD. They brag about their DVDs until Big Dick Johnson comes in to dance. Shawn superkicks him, earning a thank you from Cena.

Rated-RKO is getting a Tag Team Title shot next week and Randy Orton is ready to destroy John Cena tonight. Edge is more excited about Money in the Bank so he better go qualify.

We look at Edge winning Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania XXI.

We look at Rob Van Dam winning Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania XXII.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Edge vs. Rob Van Dam

Edge’s wristlock doesn’t get him very far to start as Van Dam slips away and hits the finger pointing. Some kicks put Edge into the corner for the monkey flip and it’s time to go to the floor for a break. Back with Van Dam working on an armbar and then cranking back on said arm for two. Rob knocks him outside and hits the spinning kick to the back over the barricade.

Edge is rocked but he is fine enough to come back with a hanging swinging neckbreaker. It’s Rob in trouble for the first time and Edge goes really evil by mocking the finger point. Dude, gimmick infringement is never cool. The chinlock goes on until Rob kicks him in the head for the break and there’s the running spinwheel kick in the corner. Rolling Thunder is loaded up but Edge reverses into a powerslam in a nice counter.

Edge crotches him on top but the superplex attempt is broken up with another crotching. Rob kicks him to the floor and follows with a nice dive. Back in and Edge dropkicks him out of the air for two, only to have the spear hit the corner. The split legged moonsault gives Van Dam two more and there’s the step over kick to the face. The Five Star is loaded up but Randy Orton comes out for the distraction, allowing Edge to hit the spear for the pin.

Rating: B-. These two were having a heck of a match and I was getting into the back and forth stuff to the point where the Orton interference surprised me. Edge winning is fine and it makes sense to push a Raw star over one of the only ECW stars, so go with what makes the most sense in a pretty big match. The fact that it was good made it even better.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Mickie James

Melina is challenging and even JR is half drooling over the two of them. They fight over a lockup to start with neither being able to get very far. Mickie takes her down by the hair and hits a basement dropkick to send Melina outside. The baseball slide is cut off and Mickie is sent into the barricade for a crash.

Back in and Melina throws her down by the hair before tying up the legs. That goes nowhere as Mickie sweeps the legs and hammers away, followed by some hair tosses. The Thesz press lets Mickie hammer away even more but Melina grabs the ropes to counter a hurricanrana. Mickie lands HARD on her head, allowing Melina to grab a jackknife cover for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. That felt like an injury ending and if that is the case, good for them for wrapping up the match as soon as they did. It was a nasty landing and the medics checking on Mickie after the match was hardly surprising. Melina winning the title makes sense as she has been the biggest star in the division as of late so let her run with the thing.

Post match Mickie is checked on while the paparazzi swarm Melina.

Post break, Mickie doesn’t want to talk about what happened and slaps Todd Grisham for not getting it.

Great Khali vs. Highlanders

Khali knocks both of them around like he’s the Great Khali and they’re the Highlanders and the chop puts Rory on the floor. Robbie gets chokeslammed for the pin with a boot on the chest.

Some of the cast of Grindhouse is here.

We look back at the opening sequence and the HILARIOUS Trump photos. There was a Mr. T. and Hulk Hogan version for Wrestlemania flavor.

Kenny Dykstra is asking Coach for more competition but Great Khali comes in to scare Kenny off. Khali wants better competition and Coach agrees. That’s enough for Khali to leave, so here is Ron Simmons for a subdued catchphrase.

Ashley revealed her Playboy cover on Smackdown.

Melina is happy to have won the title but she wants to know why Ashley is getting all of the attention. Do you know how many times she has turned Playboy down?

Mr. Perfect is going into the Hall of Fame, as he should. We get a montage of Perfect being amazing at sports, which it turns out he could do, but not when the camera was on. The solution? Lie to him about the camera being on.

Wrestlemania Recall: Wrestlemania I.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Non-title. Orton drives him into the corner to start and stomps him down without much effort. Cena is right back with the release fisherman’s suplex for two, with JR connecting the bridges and calling it a near PerfectPlex. A slam and elbow get two on Orton but Cena misses a charge and gets clotheslined down for the same. It doesn’t seem to bother Cena, who is right back with a bulldog to send Orton outside. Back in and it’s a double clothesline to put both of them down for a breather. Orton rolls outside again and grabs a chair as we take a break.

Back with Cena missing the shoulder and Orton hits the hanging DDT. Orton hammers him down in the corner and it’s time for the circle stomp. The big knee drop gets two and we hit the rare standing chinlock. Make that the seated chinlock but Cena powers out, only to get punched in the face. Cena makes the clothesline comeback and it’s the Throwback into the Shuffle. Orton rakes his eyes to escape the FU and there’s a dropkick to put Cena down again. The high crossbody connects but Cena rolls through for two. Orton is back with the backbreaker but the RKO is shoved away. The FU is loaded up again, drawing in Edge for the DQ.

Rating: B-. It’s so weird to see this as a fresh match but these two do work well together. You can see them doing their things and setting up their big stuff but neither of them could get that far ahead. Edge running in for the DQ wasn’t the biggest surprise after Orton ran out earlier, but they were having another good match on the way there.

Post match the Conchairto is loaded up but Shawn Michaels runs in for the save. Shawn grabs the chair and teases hitting Cena but throws it down instead. Shawn: “Not this time.” A tease of a superkick ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started slowly but picked up near the end, which is always nice to see. You can feel the Wrestlemania build coming and that is a nice feeling, as they are getting the big pieces in place early. Money in the Bank is going to give some other people something to do and the rest of the card can fill itself out. Good enough show here, as the Road to Wrestlemania is starting to come together.

 

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Monday Night Raw – February 5, 2007: Tis The Season

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 5, 2007
Location: Tyson Events Center, Sioux City, Iowa
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The Road To Wrestlemania continues as we still need to know what Undertaker is going to do with his Royal Rumble win. There are a few different choices and all three of them have been teased, which makes things a bit more interesting. Granted the chances of Undertaker picking the ECW World Title are the same as me being named Miss Nevada 1978, so there are only two choices. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Undertaker winning the Royal Rumble and teasing the Wrestlemania title match pick.

Here is Undertaker to make his decision. Since that takes quite a long time, here is an impatient John Cena before anything can be said. Bobby Lashley is here as well, with Batista rounding out the quartet. Undertaker stares at all three of them….and then gives Batista the throat slit so set up the match.

This immediately brings out Shawn Michaels to say John Cena needs a Wrestlemania opponent and he is here to help a brother out. Cue Randy Orton to say that he is facing Cena at Wrestlemania. Cue Edge as this is a rather large opening segment. Edge wants the title shot but now it’s Vince McMahon to ask why we’re in the middle of a cornfield in this horrible state.

Vince finds it interesting that no one is challenging Bobby Lashley, so he’ll be defending the ECW World Title against someone from the Raw roster tonight. As for everyone else, let’s have a triple threat between Orton, Michaels and Edge with the winner challenging Cena at Wrestlemania. Undertaker and Batista are left alone for the staredown and Undertaker plants him with a chokeslam (or powerslam as JR put it). This had a lot of people involved but it certainly set up a lot at once, so I think I can forgive it.

Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin/Chris Masters vs. Carlito/Cryme Tyme

Torrie Wilson is here with the latter. JR: “King can I give a shout out to my barbecue loving buddies in Oklahoma.” Lawler: “I guess?” JR: “Well I just did.” It’s a big brawl to start until we settle down to JTG Thesz pressing Benjamin to hammer away. Haas, now with cornrows, comes in for an overhead belly to belly to send JTG flying though and it’s Masters coming in to hammer away. JTG slips out of another suplex attempt though and Carlito comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Carlito O’Connor rolls Masters, only to get caught with a springboard Blockbuster from Benjamin to steal the pin.

Rating: D+. Normally I’m a fan of merging a few feuds together but I never need to see Masters vs. Carlito in any form again. It has been done on and off for the better part of a year now and wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. Cryme Tyme vs. Haas/Benjamin isn’t exactly great either but at least it is something new.

We recap Fan Appreciation Night last week, with Donald Trump giving the fans money.

Vince McMahon is annoyed at Trump when Kenny Dykstra comes in to ask about the ECW World Title shot tonight. McMahon gives him the match to get rid of him but Coach has a letter from Trump. He’s going to be here next week to up the ante with a business proposal. Vince wants Trump to join his special club.

Ric Flair hits on Maria a bit and says that he is excited by Undertaker vs. Batista. As for tonight, he gets to face Jeff Hardy and if he wins, he gets an Intercontinental Title shot at Wrestlemania.

Melina and Candice Michelle have one of those authentic talks about Candice’s Super Bowl commercial. Candice leaves so here is John Morrison to say Melina looks great and he is ready for Super Crazy. Tonight, Melina is winning the Women’s Title.

Balls Mahoney is in the ring for a match and here is Coach to introduce the special opponent.

Umaga vs. Balls Mahoney

Armando Alejandro Estrada is here with Umaga. Mahoney strikes away to start and is knocked into the corner without much effort. Some choking on the rope ensues and the Samoan drop crushes Mahoney. The running hip attack sets up the Samoan Spike for the easy win.

Johnny Nitro vs. Super Crazy

Melina and Mickie James are here as well. Nitro starts fast and sends him into the corner, with Crazy sunset flipping him for two. That earns him a shot to the face though and Nitro grabs a cravate. Crazy fights up but Melina’s distraction lets Nitro roll him up for two. Mickie trips Nitro right back so Crazy can hit some dropkicks. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker sets up the moonsault but Nitro catches him on top. That’s broken up as well though and the moonsault gives Crazy the pretty big upset pin.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Mickie James

Melina is challenging and thankfully they didn’t bother redoing the entrances (including for Nitro and Crazy, who are here as well). The catfight is on to start until Mickie James remembers that she’s Mickie James and forearms away. A hammerlock has Mickie in trouble so the fans chant for her, which Lawler calls being “silently” behind her. Melina takes her down by the leg but gets kicked away, giving us a standoff.

Mickie cartwheels into a monkey flip to send Melina bailing over to Nitro. Melina gets in a shot to the face and sends her face first into the mat for two. Back up and they slug it out until Melina sends her into the corner. An elbow to the face staggers Melina so Nitro goes after her, only to get hurricanranaed by Crazy. Melina pulls her outside by the top (Lawler approves) but Mickie is right back with a sunset flip to retain.

Rating: D+. This was one that sounded better on paper than it worked in reality as Melina wasn’t quite ready for the big showdown. Then again, you’re only going to be able to do so much in less than five minutes with two more people on the floor. Mickie was doing her thing well enough, but they didn’t exactly make this work.

Post match Melina is rather annoyed at the paparazzi trying to take her picture.

John Cena wishes Shawn Michaels good luck tonight but he would rather Edge win. Cena knows he can beat Edge and reminds Shawn that they’re Tag Team Champions. That sounded like a bit of a wink about how little they care about the titles.

Jeff Hardy vs. Ric Flair

Non-title but if Flair wins, he gets an Intercontinental Title shot at Wrestlemania. Hardy shoulders him down to start so Flair pops back up for a WOO. The chops have Hardy in the corner but he switches places to take Flair down. Hardy goes up but tweaks the knee on the landing, allowing Flair to chop block him down. Some leg cranking has Hardy in more trouble and the fans are behind Flair.

Hardy fights up and scores with an enziguri (breaking up a WOO in the process), setting up the sitout jawbreaker. The Whisper in the Wind connects and there’s the Twist of Fate. The Swanton misses though and Flair is right back on the knee. Flair loads up the Figure Four but stops to strut, allowing Hardy to small package him for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m going to assume that the ending was designed to make Flair look stupid and it certainly worked in that regard. There was no reason for Flair to start strutting around when he had Hardy in that much trouble. The match was good enough up to that point, but I would assume that it was setting things up for later, as otherwise that is pretty out of character for this version of Flair.

Post match Hardy praises Flair, who shakes his hand.

Wrestlemania is 55 days away.

We recap Undertaker’s selection from earlier tonight.

Batista isn’t intimidated and is ready for some payback. He’s fine with teaming with Undertaker at No Way Out too. That’s quite the calm champion.

ECW World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Kenny Dykstra

Lashley is defending and scares Dykstra over to the apron to start. Back in and a single right hand sends Dykstra over the top and out to the floor for a great visual. Lashley knocks him off the apron for a bonus but Dykstra gets smart by dropkicking the knee out. Some stomping gives Dykstra two and we hit the chinlock.

That’s broken up and Lashley hits some clotheslines, setting up a t-bone suplex. A dropkick puts Lashley on the floor though and we take a break. We come back with Dykstra holding a front facelock but Lashley powers up without much trouble. The delayed suplex sets up the gorilla press powerslam to retain.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? Dykstra is a generic heel and Lashley doesn’t know how to do much other than his power stuff. Lashley has all of the tools to be a major star but you need to give him a good bit more seasoning. That is showing in places like this, as he wasn’t able to get anything out of Dykstra, who wasn’t ready to do something like this on his own.

Edge comes up to Randy Orton, who doesn’t want to talk. They aren’t partners tonight because Orton wants the Wrestlemania title shot. That’s fine with Edge, but he wants to make sure Shawn Michaels doesn’t get the shot.

Carlito and Torrie Wilson are going out and say goodbye to Ric Flair. They’re going out, but Flair doesn’t want to hear it after Carlito lost his match earlier tonight. Flair goes into a huge rant about how Carlito isn’t in the main event because he’s a lazy SOB. Guys like Carlito have no passion or guts but want to fly first class with someone like Torrie Wilson. Carlito hasn’t bled, sweat or paid the price but he’s taking Flair’s spot.

Flair has been here forever but Vince McMahon has told him that if he wants to stay, he has to prove it. Now Flair is trying to prove himself but Carlito is going out before the main event. Flair walks off, leaving a stunned Carlito with something to think about. This felt like Flair being told to go and let loose and he made it work because that is the kind of emotion he can bring like almost no one else.

Shawn Michaels vs. Edge vs. Randy Orton

The winner gets the WWE Title shot at Wrestlemania. At least Shawn has his title here, which doesn’t help him out as he gets double teamed down. Shawn comes back with a double clothesline and some atomic drops with Orton being tossed outside. Back up and Orton shoves Shawn off the top for a crash but only teases the RKO to Edge. We take a break and come back with Shawn tossing Orton and suplexing Edge. There’s a baseball slide to knock Orton onto the announcers’ table and a Thesz press to Edge as Shawn keeps the pace up.

Edge boots him in the face but gets caught going up top. A crotching puts Edge on the floor but Orton is back in with the backbreaker to Michaels. The RKO connects but Edge makes the save. Edge and Orton shake hands but then instantly turn on each other to start the fight. Stereo crossbodies put both of them down, allowing Shawn to drop the top rope elbow on Edge. Sweet Chin Music is blocked so Shawn sidesteps a spear, which hits Orton instead. A superkick drops Edge and Shawn pins Orton for the title shot.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where there wasn’t a ton of drama to the ending but at least they did well on their way to the finish. Michaels getting the shot at Cena was pretty much locked up last week but they had to make it official here. The action was good as you would expect and it set up Wrestlemania, so there isn’t much to complain about here.

Post match John Cena in for the staredown but here are Batista and Undertaker to stare at the top of them and then each other to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show had a couple of positives, including setting up a pair of Wrestlemania title matches and not having Donald Trump. You can tell that things are getting important around here again and the energy is rising. Throw in Flair’s great promo and there were parts of this show that worked very well. Unfortunately there were also parts that didn’t work, which was most of the actual wrestling. That wasn’t what mattered, but it did bring down a lot of the show.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – January 22, 2007: The Rumbley One

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 22, 2007
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble but you might not know it by watching the previous shows. The Rumble itself has barely been mentioned as most of the focus has been on Umaga vs. John Cena for the World Title. That’s not a bad move, but it is a bit of a weird one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Bam Bam Bigelow. That’s a hard one.

We open with a recap of Rated-RKO taking out some of Shawn Michaels’ friends last week but getting taken out by Shawn himself in the main event.

Here is Shawn Michaels to get things going. Last week, he felt a feeling that he has tried to overcome for years. He does not like those feelings coming back but those days of stopping are gone. Shawn feels like he can be WWE Champion again and that starts this Sunday by winning the Royal Rumble. May God have mercy on the 29 other entrants who dare to get in his way and no mortal man is going to get in his way….but here is Edge to interrupt.

Edge talks about how he is the one who is going to win the Royal Rumble because he has been to the top of the mountain twice, but Shawn tells him to shut up. The fight is on and security can’t break it up. We take a break and come back with the break still on in the back and security still not being much good.

Jeff Hardy vs. Joey Mercury

Non-title and this is Raw vs. Smackdown as Jeff wants revenge on Mercury for helping take out Matt Hardy on Friday. Johnny Nitro and Melina are here too but Jeff throws Mercury in to start in a hurry. Mercury gets in a shot so Nitro pulls the mat back on the floor. That’s enough for an ejection but Mercury is able to grab Jeff’s face and rip away. Jeff fights up with some elbows to the face into the Whisper in the Wind. The Twist of Fate drops Mercury on his damaged face to give Jeff the fast pin.

Post match Jeff gets out of there before Nitro and Melina can get back.

Jonathan Coachman comes in to see Vince McMahon and has an idea for tonight. He’ll throw Shawn Michaels and Edge out, but Vince makes a street fight instead. In addition, Vince has an announcement to make in the ring.

Here are Vince and Coach for a chat. Vince talks about reading Donald Trump’s letter last week, so tonight he is going to read his own letter to Trump. The letter talks about Trump’s TV ratings being awful, but they will go up when Vince guest stars on the Apprentice. He is the reason for Raw’s ratings success, and it could be due to his good looks, his charisma, or his Herculean physique. The people love him and he loves them back. Fans: “A**HOLE!” Vince: “You’re making it tough to love you back!”

Vince promises to show his love for the people next week but here is John Cena to interrupt. Cena wants to know when Vince became Brother Love and tells him to stop yapping about Donald Trump. It’s like Vince is obsessed with him and an obsessed Vince McMahon is never a good thing. Cena: “Remember that obsession you had with starting your own football league?” Cena compares Vince and Trump, with Coach saying Trump does everything bigger than Vince, including having more money. That’s too far for Vince, who makes Cena vs. Coach for tonight.

Chris Masters vs. Super Crazy

Masters jumps him to start but Crazy hits a quick middle rope crossbody. Crazy gets thrown down again and the stomping is on in a hurry. Back up and Crazy slugs away, including a spinwheel kick, which has Lawler thinking Crazy is “all jacked up on Mountain Dew.” Masters catches him coming out of the corner with the Masterlock but Crazy climbs the corner and drops back onto him for the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go very far but Crazy wins to give him a little momentum. WWE seems interested in pushing him and he hasn’t done badly at all in response. I could go for a bit more of him and the fans seem to like him well enough. Granted it isn’t hard to get cheered against Masters, so the pairing does make sense.

Coach tries to convince Vince McMahon that he is way richer than Donald Trump but Vince is more worried about showing the fans how he appreciates them next week. Oh and Coach’s match with Cena is still on.

Kenny Dykstra insists that he is going to win the Royal Rumble on Sunday. He defeated Ric Flair three times so he knows he can do it. Maria doesn’t seem convinced but Dykstra says this is going to be his year.

A very banged up Randy Orton isn’t happy with Edge for leaving him to get mauled by Shawn Michaels last week. Edge tries to explain what happened and wants to know if Orton has his back in getting rid of Shawn Michaels tonight. Orton says we’ll wait and see as you can feel the tension.

John Cena vs. Jonathan Coachman

Non-title. Actually hang on a second as Coach has another idea: we’re going to have a Royal Rumble, and if Cena wins, THEN he can face Coach one on one. Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch are here first and the double teaming is on in a hurry, including a bunch of right hands. Cade drops Murdoch down into a legdrop on Cena and the beating is on in the corner. Cena fights out of said corner and tosses Murdoch without much effort.

Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas are in next, with Viscera following shortly thereafter. Cade comes back in to help hold Cena down for Viscera’s elbow. Cue Great Khali to starts clearing the ring until Viscera and Cena are the only others left. A big boot drops Viscera and Khali tosses him, allowing Cena to come in off the top with a shoulder. That has almost no effect so Khali hits a clothesline and tosses him out for the win.

Rating: D+. This was much more of an angle than a match and that’s all it needed to be. Khali is becoming a player in a hurry because he is pretty easy to push. You can probably pencil him in for a title program soon after Wrestlemania is over and I’ve heard far worse ideas. Not much of a match of course, but at least it had a point.

Post match Khali runs Cena over again and drops him with ease, allowing Coach to run in for two. Cue Umaga to jump Cena from behind and I guess that’s a DQ? Either way, Umaga splashes Cena through a table to crush his ribs. It takes a long time to get rid of Umaga and Cena has to be helped to the back.

Candice Michelle/Mickie James vs. Victoria/Melina

This is Candice’s return after Victoria broke her nose, meaning a lot of nose pointing ensues. Mickie starts fast with a basement dropkick to Melina and we get the required spank. A hurricanrana sends Melina flying out of the corner but Victoria pulls Mickie down from the apron. There’s a double wishbone to keep Mickie in trouble and Melina chokes in the ropes, sending Lawler into hysterics.

Mickie avoids Victoria’s running charge in the corner and the hot tag brings in Candice to start cleaning house. A dropkick puts Melina down but Victoria hits a heck of a knee to the face. Mickie comes in for the save and dives onto Melina, leaving Candice to hit a middle rope….uh….I guess we’ll say elbow for the pin on Victoria.

Rating: D. Yeah what else were you expecting here? This was about getting Candice out there to show off what seems to be her new cosmetic enhancements and rather limited outfit. Candice is absolutely trying but there is a bit of a way to go between effort and success. Pretty bad match, but you can almost guarantee that Candice is getting a push in a hurry.

Carlito vs. Kenny Dykstra

Torrie Wilson is here with Carlito, who sends Kenny into the corner without much effort. Kenny is right back with a dropkick into a chinlock but Carlito gets to his feet and hammers away. A springboard back elbow drops Kenny but he grabs a rollup into a pinfall reversal sequence. Kenny finally grabs the trunks for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing match here with Dykstra getting a win over someone other than Ric Flair. It doesn’t make things that much better for him as all of the problems are still there, but at least they are trying with someone else. At the same time, Carlito is still about as uninteresting as you can get, which has been the case for a long time now.

We recap Rated-RKO vs. Shawn Michaels from last week in the same video that started the show.

Cryme Tyme is selling Royal Rumble numbers to Eugene and Super Crazy. Since he is crazy, Crazy will take any number. Crazy is rather pleased with his number and Eugene gets #30. Hold on though as Cryme Tyme explains that he really wants to be #1…..which he can be for another $50. Eugene leaves, and we find out that not only are the numbers not real, but Eugene isn’t even in the number. Also, they sold the painting The Scream and it wasn’t real either. Cryme Tyme leaves and it turns out that Ron Simmons bought said painting. Guess what he has to say.

Royal Rumble Rundown.

We look back at Cena being taken out. Cena may have a ruptured spleen.

We look back at Edge and Shawn Michaels brawling earlier tonight.

Shawn Michaels vs. Edge

Street fight and they’re both in street clothes. Shawn wins the early slugout and pulls Edge’s belt off for a whipping. The weapons are brought in but Edge knocks him out of the air with a trashcan lid. We take a break and come back with Edge busted open and hitting him in the ribs with something made of metal.

Edge gets creative by superplexing a ladder onto Shawn for two but a powerbomb is broken up with some right hands to the head. The comeback is on with Shawn hitting the atomic drop. A chain is wrapped around Edge’s eyes and now he is busted open as well. Shawn drops Edge onto a ladder bridged over two sets of steps but Edge gets up to catch Shawn on top.

That doesn’t make a difference either though as Shawn drops Edge ribs first onto the ladder again. Sweet Chin Music is loaded up but Edge reverses into something like an electric chair (Edge tried to pick him up but dropped Shawn on the way to the shoulders). The spear is countered into the Thesz press though and Shawn grabs a chair to knock Edge silly. Another Conchairto is loaded up but here is Randy Orton to hit the RKO and give Edge the pin.

Rating: B. These two getting some time in a violent match is always going to work and that was the case here. It felt like a main event and the two of them beat each other up for about fifteen minutes. The ending makes sense given what they are doing as Edge and Orton want to destroy Shawn, but Orton is going to mess with Edge on the way there if he can.

Post match Orton throws Edge over the top but here are Ric Flair, Kenny Dykstra and Carlito in a row. Shawn comes back up with some Sweet Chin Musics

Overall Rating: D+. The main event was the only worthwhile thing on this show as the Royal Rumble only needs so much of a build. Umaga injuring Cena was a good angle but other than that and the main event, there wasn’t much to see on the whole thing. It isn’t that surprising as the pay per view is set, but it would have been nice to have more than one good match in two hours.

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Monday Night Raw – June 21, 2021: Quality Qualifying

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 21, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith

We’re done with the Cell and that means it is time to start getting ready for Money in the Bank. That means a lot of qualifying matches before we have a series of matches with the people building momentum, whatever that means going into a ladder match. Other than that, Bobby Lashley needs a new challenger after beating Drew McIntyre again. Let’s get to it.

Here is Hell In A Cell if you need a recap.

The briefcases and the Cell are above the ring and the MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY song is back, because there are two songs ever for that show.

Here are Bobby Lashley and MVP, flanked by his latest group of women, for the VIP Lounge. MVP brags about Lashley retaining and hands him the floor. Lashley says he was pushed to his limit last night but proved that he is still the Almighty. They brag about their win and load up a toast but here is the New Day to interrupt, complete with a plate of toast. Said toast is thrown into the ring, prompting MVP to talk about how this is more proof of what goofs these two are.

MVP accuses Kofi Kingston of not taking things seriously and hanging out with his video game obsessed friend. Kofi says not so fast but Lashley talks about being on a higher level than the two of them. That makes Kofi laugh as he talks about becoming WWE Champion at Wrestlemania XXXV and then beating Lashley last week. We see a clip of said loss and Lashley isn’t cool with that. The challenge is on Lashley accepts for Money in the Bank, but he wants to make sure it’s one on one. Therefore, he can beat up Xavier Woods tonight.

That’s cool with Woods, who cuts off MVP from talking down to him. Woods runs down his own accolades, which mainly include being on YouTube and G4. Oh and let’s make tonight’s match inside the Cell. I’m surprised they didn’t put a USA NETWORK APPROVED sticker on the screen, as that could not be more of WWE appeasing them over FOX getting a Cell match if they tried.

Earlier today, AJ Styles ran into the Viking Raiders and promised to become the new Mr. Money in the Bank. He’s so sure that he’ll beat them for the Tag Team Titles soon after, but the Raiders aren’t convinced. AJ slaps the turkey leg out of Ivar’s hand but violence is held back.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Ricochet vs. AJ Styles

Ricochet knows what it takes to get to the WWE Title match and he’ll show why he’s something special. AJ gets sent to the apron to start and a springboard kick to the face puts him on the floor. Ricochet misses a springboard moonsault though and gets posted hard as we take an early break.

Back with AJ dropping Ricochet again but a shot to the face rocks Styles for a change. There’s a crossbody to send AJ into the corner and a running clothesline catches him for a bonus. Back to back suplexes give Ricochet two but AJ scores with a kind of torture rack powerbomb for his own near fall.

A strike off goes to Ricochet, who ducks the Pele Kick and grabs a bridging German suplex for two more. AJ grabs the fireman’s carry backbreaker but here are the Viking Raiders to go after Omos. A missed charge sends Omos through the barricade though and the distraction lets Ricochet counter the Phenomenal Forearm into the Recoil for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C+. I’m rather glad to see Ricochet getting his chance and it isn’t like AJ needs to be in Money in the Bank when he might be defending the Tag Team Titles on the same show. Ricochet is a perfect person to put in this kind of a match and giving him a win over AJ isn’t such a big upset that it is too much to believe.

Riddle, now with RKBro merchandise (including a bag and a coffee cup) talks to Randy Orton about wanting to put a stash of Burger King Whoppers in the briefcase when one of them win it tonight. Orton: “RIDDLE! WHAT DO YOU WANT???” Riddle asks for some pointers and dances a bit while waiting. Orton tells him to stay out of his way, which Riddle thinks will be difficult if they’re both in the ladder match. Riddle thinks it would be awesome if they are both in the match, but Orton disagrees and walks off.

We look at Eva Marie’s return with her unnamed partner.

Eva Marie, while getting the interviewer’s name wrong, says that she had a cold last week to prevent her from getting in the ring. That’s why she had a substitute, in the form of….Doudrop. Well of course it is.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Eva Marie/Doudrop vs. Asuka/Naomi

Eva starts with Asuka and tags out immediately, as you would expect. Asuka can’t do much with Doudrop to start so it’s off to Naomi, as Eva drops down to the floor. Doudrop plants Naomi and hits the Cannonball in the corner, but Eva tags herself in as Doudrop goes up. This time it’s Doudrop heading to the floor as Eva reaches for the tag, meaning Naomi can grab a rollup for the pin at 2:50. That’s a change of pace and they have me curious so well done.

Eva is stunned and Doudrop smiles at her.

We look back at Charlotte beating Rhea Ripley last night via DQ, because Charlotte needed to win as the feud is extended.

We look back at the opening segment to set up the Cell match tonight.

Here are Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to deal with the Rhea Ripley/Charlotte fallout. Ripley comes out and wants to know why that was a DQ, but here is Charlotte to promise to destroy Ripley soon. Deville gets to the point and makes the rematch for Money in the Bank. They kept this really short here and there wasn’t much of a reason not to.

We recap the Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Tamina/Natalya, including Natalya beating Rose last night.

Tamina and Natalya were having a photo shoot when an interview broke out. Hold on though, as they were distracted by Rose and Brooke training in the nearby ring. Natalya said they were trying to have an interview (not exactly) and another fight was teased. Mandy and Dana kicked them off the apron and got rather smug.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Randy Orton vs. John Morrison

Miz is on commentary. Morrison takes Orton down to start and a kick to the head gets an early two. An armbar has Orton in more trouble but he fights up and takes it to the floor. Morrison sends him into the announcers’ table a few times but Orton does it far more times, setting up a belly to back drop onto the table.

We take a break and come back with Orton stomping away and grabbing his own chinlock. Morrison fights up and hits a springboard kick to the face to send things outside. Orton’s hand is slammed into the steps, setting up an armbar so we can get an inset ad for Fast and Furious 9.

Back to full screen with Morrison staying on the arm but Orton fights up and hits the hanging DDT. The RKO is loaded up but Miz fires off the Drip Stick, allowing Morrison to grab a rollup for two. An uppercut sends Morrison to the apron but here is Riddle for a slow speed chase after Miz. The distraction lets Morrison kick Orton down and hit Starship Pain for the pin at 12:20.

Rating: C-. This was similar to Ricochet beating Styles as it is an upset but it isn’t an earth shattering upset. Morrison being in the ladder match is a bit more interesting than Orton as it gives the chance of something fresh getting into the main event scene, even if Morrison has absolutely no chance of winning. The Drip Stick is a bit stupid, but that’s kind of the point of Miz and Morrison so it’s hard to complain that much.

We recap Alexa Bliss using her mind control powers to control Nia Jax and beat Shayna Baszler.

Nia Jax says she won’t attack Reginald again tonight. Shayna Baszler insists that she isn’t scared of anyone in the locker room and no one is stopping them from qualifying for Money in the Bank. Jax says there is something different about Alexa Bliss.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Bliss has new music, featuring her talking a lot. Before the match, Nikki Cross talks about how she is trying to stand out and needs something to find a way to succeed despite her shortcomings. Therefore, she now has a mask and superhero costume while saying she is embracing her spirit. So she’s Scottish Mighty Molly?

Baszler drives Cross into the corner to start and sends her to the apron. A slingshot Oklahoma roll gets two on Baszler so it’s off to Jax. Cross sends her outside where we pause so Bliss can mind control Reginald. Baszler and Jax talk him out of it but Cross dives onto all three as we take a break.

Back with Bliss hitting her moonsault knees on Baszler but Jax comes back in to take over. Baszler chokes on the ropes and grabs the chinlock for a bit. Bliss fights up and gets in a shot to the face, allowing the hot tag to Cross. House is cleaned for all of a few moments but Jax takes her into the corner. Baszler nearly hits Jax by mistake and the weekly argument is on. Bliss uses the distraction to control Reginald, who can’t bring himself to slap Jax. The distraction lets Cross grab La Majistral to pin Baszler at 10:09, because Nia Jax is just there to stand around while Baszler gets pinned.

Rating: C. There is a lot here, as Bliss continues her mind control deal, which I’ll still take over the Lily nonsense. At the same time, it’s really, really annoying to have Baszler become the designated jobber, as these stupid arguments between her and Jax continue. That has been their thing since they came together and it hasn’t been that interesting since it started. On the other hand, you have Cross FINALLY getting some TV time. Yeah the superhero deal is kind of dumb, but I’ll take that over her sitting on the sidelines doing nothing.

Drew McIntyre promises to fight despite being banged up, even quoting Winston Churchill.

Jinder Mahal, with lackeys, Jeff Hardy, Cedric Alexander and Sheamus are arguing about who should be competing for Money in the Bank. Sonya Deville doesn’t want to hear it and the decisions are final. Sheamus brings up being US Champion and thinks he should be in automatically. Adam Pearce takes that to mean Sheamus’ nose is healed and he can defend his title. Sheamus panics and goes off to find his doctor. Mahal complains about not being in and suggests he should be the alternate. Everyone leaves.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Riddle vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew, with his wrecked back, goes for the grappling to start so Riddle goes to the ropes. With that not working, McIntyre blasts him with a clothesline and fires away in the corner. There’s the big toss across the ring for two on Riddle and a toss suplex gives Drew the same. An elbow to the face gives Drew two more but Riddle pulls him off the middle rope for a crash. There’s the Broton to set up the gutwrench suplex, banging up Drew’s back again.

Another one is countered into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to send Riddle outside. That’s fine with Riddle, who snaps off a belly to belly as we take a break. Back with Drew fighting out of a chinlock but Riddle gets in a shot to the back to put him down again. The Broton hits raised knees though and it’s an overhead belly to belly into a neckbreaker.

Somehow Drew nips up and the reverse Alabama Slam gets a slightly delayed two. Riddle is taken up top but he manages to crotch Drew….who lifts himself up for the release German superplex anyway. Cue Randy Orton to watch and we take another break. Back again with Riddle reversing a super White Noise into a sunset bomb, followed by a knee to the face for two.

Drew grabs a Michinoku Driver for two and goes up, only to dive into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a Futureshock for two but Riddle collapses before the Claymore can launch. There’s a ripcord knee to McIntyre but the Floating Bro misses. The Claymore is countered into the Bromission, which is countered as well. The Glasgow Kiss looks to set up an electric chair but Riddle reverses into a victory roll for the pin at 22:49.

Rating: B. This worked well, as McIntyre tried to fight through the pain but still lost in the end. The fact that McIntyre almost never loses a match clean makes this all the more interesting and Riddle gets to continue his rise back to being something. I’m curious to see where McIntyre goes from here, but he has been on top long enough that a step down isn’t going to hurt him.

Post match Riddle scooters up the ramp but Randy Orton isn’t pleased. Riddle: “Randy what’s wrong? You can always talk to me Bro.” Orton looks at him but Riddle still can’t get a fist bump.

We recap Elias vs. Jaxson Ryker, with Elias running away twice in a row.

Ryker is whipping himself with a strap when Mansoor comes up to ask for some advice. That doesn’t seem to sit well so Mansoor leaves, but Ryker says never let your enemy escape. More often than not, those closest to you are wolves in sheep’s clothing. Next week, it’s Elias vs. Ryker in a strap match. Elias is all about the music, and next week, the big hit will be the strap against Elias’ flesh.

Mansoor goes to leave when he runs into Mustafa Ali, who says Mansoor is asking the wrong people. Why are people in the Money in the Bank qualifying matches stealing spots from the two of them? If they don’t get the chance to climb the ladder of success, you have to build your own ladder. Ryker whips himself some more.

The Cell is lowered.

Bobby Lashley vs. Xavier Woods

Non-title with MVP and Kofi Kingston here as well. Woods tries to start fast but gets powered out to the floor. That means it’s time for a chair, which Lashley punches into Woods’ face. The running charge hits the post though and Woods is able to dropkick Lashley into the Cell twice in a row. A running chair shot drops Lashley again and we take a break.

Back with Lashley hammering away until Woods misses a charge and falls out to the floor. Woods’ charge lets Lashley tie him in the ring skirt though and the beating is on again. Lashley stops to yell at Kofi though and Woods gets back inside. A forearm to the leg cuts Lashley down for a second and Woods gets in a hard kendo stick shot. Woods gets in more shots with the stick on the floor and a victory roll faceplant is good for two back inside.

A tornado DDT gives Woods two more so he sets up a table. Lashley’s quick powerbomb attempt is broken up and a superkick puts him on said table. The rope walk elbow sends Lashley through the table for two (with Woods almost overshooting him) but Lashley sends him face first into a chair in the corner. The spear sets up the Hurt Lock to finish Woods at 13:37.

Rating: C+. This was another match that didn’t need to be in the Cell as it was little more than a street fight for the most part. The fact that it was the fourth match in the Cell in four days didn’t help either, but I would bet on this being a way to appease USA more than anything else. There was never any doubt here and that’s ok, as Woods got to look good for a bit.

Post match the beating stays on with MVP getting inside the Cell and locking it back. Lashley puts Woods up against the Cell as Kofi can’t do anything to end the show. That was an effective use of the Cell for a change, though I’m not sure why Kofi didn’t get the referee to unlock the door again.

Overall Rating: C+. As usual, Raw is better when they have somethi0ng going through the course of the show to keep them from going way off course. That was the case here with a slate of mostly good qualifying matches, though you can’t do that every week. Money in the Bank is starting to take a nice shape, but there is a long time to go and that is where WWE can get in trouble. Good enough show this week though, and a FAR better version of Raw than usual.

Results
Ricochet b. AJ Styles – Recoil
Naomi/Asuka b. Eva Marie/Doudrop – Rollup to Marie
John Morrison b. Randy Orton – Starship Pain
Nikki Cross/Alexa Bliss b. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax – La Majistral to Baszler
Riddle b. Drew McIntyre – Victory roll
Bobby Lashley b. Xavier Woods – Hurt Lock

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 31, 2021: Half And A Better Half

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 31, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s Memorial Day, meaning we might be in for a huge show or it might be one that has absolutely nothing because no one is going to be watching. The main event is Drew McIntyre vs. Kofi Kingston to crown a new #1 contender to Bobby Lashley, though that was the case last week as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We get the annual Memorial Day video.

Jimmy Smith is introduced as the newest member of the broadcast team and we run down the card.

It’s time for MizTV, featuring the return of the un-undead Miz. After the usual intro, Miz talks about how he was hurt in THAT match….but he isn’t sure why John Morrison has garlic around his neck. Morrison says he isn’t going to take any chances with Miz, so he also has his Drip Stick, which is a hand held liquid spraying cannon. Miz: “I love you.” Anyway, Miz knows that it is time to start giving back to superstars, like his first guest this week: Charlotte. After asking about the garlic, Charlotte says that Rhea Ripley has had her time and it’s time to get rid of her.

Cue Ripley, who tells Charlotte to go to h***. Morrison asks her favorite garlic bread recipe to ensure that she is not a vampire but Ripley gets to the point, promising to retain the title against Charlotte. Miz brings up Ripley not being able to beat Nikki Cross in two minutes last week.

Cue Nikki Cross, with Ripley saying she would have won if she had four minutes, but Charlotte says she could do it in one. Cross slaps her and the challenge is accepted. Ripley sounding like a kid with excuses for why she didn’t win and Morrison’s supernatural stuff got annoying in a hurry here and it was all to set up a one minute match after the break? No wonder this show has timing issues.

Charlotte vs. Nikki Cross

Two minute time limit, despite Charlotte saying she could do it in one. Charlotte is sent outside to start and Nikki switches places with her to burn off some time. The chase is on, with Cross hiding behind Rhea Ripley on the floor. Back in and Charlotte hits a knee to the ribs with thirty seconds left. Cross hits a tornado DDT and time expires at 2:00.

Riddle and Damian Priest are ready to go back on the road so Riddle asks him for some Spanish lessons. Randy Orton pops up (Has he always had that mustache?) and, after complaining about the RKO last week (Riddle: “I just kind of hit it out of nowhere.”), says if they’re going to do this tag team, they might as well do it right. Riddle can come be at ringside for Orton vs. Xavier Woods. Riddle gets way too excited so Orton shushes him, prompting Riddle to lock his mouth shut and hand Orton the invisible key. Orton throws it away and leaves, meaning Riddle goes to look for the key. The invisible one.

Randy Orton vs. Xavier Woods

Riddle is here with Orton, who gets chopped into the corner to start. Orton drops him onto the turnbuckle though and they head outside, with Orton slamming Woods face first onto the announcers’ table. A belly to back drop onto the table makes it worse and Riddle is writing notes on his hand because he can’t talk.

We take a break and come back with Orton holding a chinlock but Woods fights up with an enziguri. A discus forearm gives Woods two and he hammers away in the corner. That’s countered into a powerbomb of all things for two but the hanging DDT is broken up. Instead, Woods hits a Codebreaker on the arm and grabs a Fujiwara armbar. Riddle is VERY relieved when Orton makes the rope and now the hanging DDT can connect. Woods grabs a backslide for two but Orton comes back with the Bro Derek for the pin at 8:49.

Rating: C. Orton was trying a few different things here and the ending was a cool thing to see. Riddle and Orton continue to be the most entertaining thing on this show, assuming you can ignore the invisible key level of stuff. Woods has been doing rather well on his own as of late, though I’m not sure where this is leading for him.

Post match Riddle poses in front of Orton, who can’t bring himself to do his own pose.

We recap Shayna Baszler vs. Reginald, the latter of whom keeps costing her matches. This is the dumbest thing going in wrestling today.

MVP brings a new group of women to have some fun with Bobby Lashley (in an orange suit).

Reginald tells Nia Jax he has this, despite her being worried.

Shayna Baszler vs. Reginald

Reginald has to flip away from Baszler to start and even manages a slam to put her down. That’s too far for Baszler, who starts in on the leg to put him in trouble. Baszler stomps on the leg and cranks on it a bit, setting up the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Reginald hits a spinning crossbody, setting up a one legged moonsault. Reginald has to land on his feet when Baszler moves, so the Kirifuda Clutch goes on. Then fire comes out of the corner and Reginald rolls her up for the pin at 4:16 (ignore Baszler’s shoulder being off the mat).

Rating: F. So that just happened. The two time and longest reigning NXT Women’s Champion just lost to Reginald, a comedy character who has a job because he used to be in a circus, because an evil doll made fire come out of the post. This is the latest example of me thinking that WWE is actively trying to troll its fans.

Reginald escapes to the back and gets hugged by Nia Jax.

Drew McIntyre isn’t happy with not beating Kofi Kingston last week. He needs to change his way of thinking, to the point where he has put having children on hold to become WWE Champion again. Maybe one day he can have a Little Drew to teach about Scottish folklore, but for now, he is ready. Tonight, he’s ready for Kofi, like he was ready to beat Brock Lesnar, unlike Kofi.

Mace/T-Bar vs. Lucha House Party

During the entrances, Mace and T-Bar promise to make House Party extinct. T-Bar sends Lince Dorado into the corner to start but a quick choke lets Gran Metalik come in with a splash off of Dorado’s shoulders. Mace comes in for a spinwheel kick to the face and a kind of rough looking suplex drops Metalik again. Everything breaks down and Mace plants Dorado on the floor. T-Bar kicks Metalik out of the corner and a double chokeslam is good for the pin at 2:48. To say Mace and T-Bar did not look smooth here would be a huge understatement, as they seemed ready for a major injury on almost every move.

Alexa Bliss invites Reginald to her Playground.

Here is Sheamus for a chat. He talks about how many people have come up short against him, but that is as close to being champion as they are going to get. We see a clip from last week with Sheamus attacking Humberto Carrillo but Ricochet came in for the save. Sheamus calls that SCUMBAGGERY, which is why he hasn’t defended the title since Wrestlemania. He’ll fight both of them back to back though, and then they can go back to catering where they belong.

Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Non-title. Ricochet starts fast by sending him outside but a dive is countered into a toss into the barricade. Back in and a top rope clothesline turns Ricochet inside out….and here is Humberto Carrillo for a distraction so Ricochet can get the rollup pin at 1:17.

Sheamus vs. Humberto Carrillo

Non-title and joined in progress with Sheamus stomping away at Carrillo in the corner. Sheamus runs him over with an ax handle to the head and pulls Carrillo off the ropes for a crash back down. Carrillo fights back but walks into the Irish Curse to cut that right off. We hit the reverse chinlock to keep Carrillo in trouble but he’s back up with a few chops.

A shot to the nose busts Sheamus open a bit so he clotheslines Carrillo hard to the floor. Sheamus kicks Ricochet in the face for a bonus but the distraction lets Carrillo hit a suicide dive to send Sheamus into the announcers’ table. Back in and Carrillo’s high crossbody is countered into a swinging release Rock Bottom. Ricochet offers a distraction though and Carrillo gets a rollup for the pin at 4:58.

Rating: C-. One of the first lines from commentary told you everything you need to know about this story: “The impossible has happened. Ricochet has pinned Sheamus.” These matches aren’t about elevating Carrillo and Ricochet, but rather making Sheamus look like he slipped on a banana peel (so we could have our third rollup via distraction of the night). I’m rather glad to see Ricochet and Carrillo getting a chance, but this isn’t doing them any long term good.

Eva Marie talks about taking time away from WWE to learn some more about herself. Now she is back because she knows what it takes to get here. She wants to help others now, and the Eva-Lution is coming.

Corey Graves is nearly moved to tears by Eva Marie. Graves: “No, you’re crying.”

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke vs. Lana/Naomi

Natalya and Tamina are on commentary. Lana takes Dana down to start so Naomi can come in for a legdrop. A bulldog drops Dana again but it’s off to Mandy, who gets caught in a fireman’s carry Stunner. Everything breaks down and Naomi hits a slingshot corkscrew dive onto Dana. Lana rolls Mandy up for two but gets caught in the corner with a shoulder to the ribs. A fireman’s carry/Samoan drop combination finishes Lana at 3:52.

Rating: F. This was bad and I’m not sure how else to describe it. They weren’t hitting their moves, they weren’t timing things well and the selling was awful. Featuring these same teams in matches every week or two isn’t making them better, but rather reminding us of just how bad they really are. Keep in mind that this is all in the name of giving Natalya and Tamina some competition, because the women’s tag team division just has to exist.

Bad Bunny was on a show with Lebron James and discussed his love of wrestling.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Cedric Alexander

Shelton start fast but Cedric pokes him in the eye. The Neuralizer gives Cedric the pin at 28 seconds.

Elias tries to fire Jaxson Ryker up. Elias: “Have you ever been in battle?” Ryker: “Have you ever been in battle? Because I served in Iraq.” End of segment.

Kofi Kingston doesn’t appreciate Drew McIntyre suggesting that having a family could hold back your career. He respects everything Drew has done over his career but he can’t respect that kind of a cheap shot. Tonight, he’s going to beat Drew and then show him how to do what he hasn’t been able to do in three months (Kofi: “Though it feels like three years.”): beat Bobby Lashley.

Tag Team Titles: AJ Styles/Omos vs. Jaxson Ryker/Elias

Ryker/Elias are challenging with Elias jumping AJ to start. A snap suplex sets up a knee drop to AJ’s head but Ryker tags himself in. AJ manages to send him outside and we take a break. Back with Ryker grabbing a chinlock but getting caught with a Pele for the breather. Ryker goes over for the tag…but Elias drops to the floor. Omos comes in and gets to clean house as Ryker is wrecked. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes for Styles at 9:52.

Rating: D+. And there goes another team, as it seems we might be getting a Ryker face push. Why that would be conceived as a good idea is beyond me, but does it matter at this point? Maybe this is just something for Memorial Day, but the idea of breaking up another team in the already barely alive division seems like a really bad choice.

Nia Jax tells Reginald to be careful with Alexa Bliss. She’ll have the champagne on ice though.

Post break Elias is running from Ryker, who he has has lost it. Ryker is a veteran and an incredible athlete but he is unpredictable. The idea of traveling the roads with him makes Elias sick and he’s done.

It’s time for Alexa’s Playground with Reginald as the guest. Shayna Baszler pops up to beat Reginald down, but Alexa Bliss says Lily doesn’t like her. Baszler says this is becoming a problem and she needs to have a “chat” with Bliss. They can see each other next week. Baszler tells Lily that she is just a stupid doll.

The Viking Raiders give Mansoor some advice. Mustafa Ali comes up to say don’t trust anyone around here. Mansoor asks why he should trust Ali, who says Mansoor is getting it.

Bobby Lashley and MVP are having a good time with the women but get interrupted for some questions. MVP talks about how he doesn’t really care who wins tonight, because neither is taking the title. They can’t be at ringside anyway, so they’re going to have some fun.

Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre

The winner gets the title shot against Lashley (who, along with MVP, are barred from ringside) at HIAC. Kingston has a Green Ranger look here, because he can make something like that work. They start fast with Kofi grabbing some rollups for two each, earning himself a chop into the corner. Back up and Kofi manages to knock him outside, setting up a springboard trust fall as we take a break.

We come back with Kofi hammering away in the corner but getting knocked down again. A suplex gives McIntyre two but Kofi grabs a guillotine, which is countered into a suplex which is countered into a small package to give Kingston two. Some running forearms in the corner rock McIntyre but he snaps off a belly to belly suplex.

There’s a second suplex but Kofi counters a right hand into the SOS for two. Drew heads outside so Kofi goes onto the top of the post for the trust fall. That’s pulled out of the air though (because you can do that) and Drew sends him over the barricade as we take a break. Back again with Drew getting two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and cranking on both arms at once. With that broken up, a frustrated Drew takes him to the top but gets reversed into a powerbomb.

Kofi’s middle rope dropkick connects but Drew gets creative with a swinging Futureshock for two. A spinebuster gives McIntyre two more and a superkick gives Kofi the same. Kofi goes up top but Drew hits the choke throw superplex. The Claymore is cut off by Trouble In Paradise for a very close two as Drew grabs the rope. Kofi sends him to the floor and hits the standing double stomp from the apron. Back in and Kingston goes up again but gets Claymored out of the air for the pin at 22:40.

Rating: B+. I really, really liked this one as you had McIntyre wanting to get back to the title match but Kofi was staying on him every step. You could feel Kofi’s efforts to get back to the main event because it has been a pretty long time. This worked very well as a result and they had a heck of a match with a clean finish to send McIntyre to the pay per view. That needs to be his last title shot, but at least he got there in a very good way.

We get a post match handshake and here are Bobby Lashley and MVP for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. If I could, I would split this into two different ratings, with the main event being its own section. That match felt like it was from a totally different company, as it was entertaining, well put together and didn’t have nonsense included. That’s what sets it apart from the rest of the show, which was mostly junk.

The biggest problem on Raw is everything but the wrestling. Between the bad creative, horrible storytelling, badly scripted promos and everything moving at such a slow pace, there is only so much anyone can get out of it. There are times where it feels like they are actively trying to make a bad show and that can get really old in a hurry. Some of the parts of this show felt like a joke that got way out of hand but WWE keeps running with it anyway. That has been the case for years now and it has taken a pretty serious toll.

But then there is the main event, which was about as good of a match as you’re going to get on Raw these days. It had none of the nonsense that dragged the rest of the show down and that was so nice to see. McIntyre and Kingston proved that the talent is there and if you cut off so much of the nonsense and bad ideas, Raw could be a totally watchable show. The rest of the night was mostly bad (though not entirely), but the main event bailed a lot of this show out. Again.

Results
Nikki Cross b. Charlotte when the time limit expired
Randy Orton b. Xavier Woods – Bro Derek
Reginald b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup
Mace/T-Bar b. Lucha House Party – Double chokeslam to Metalik
Ricochet b. Sheamus – Rollup
Humberto Carrillo b. Sheamus – Rollup
Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke b. Lana/Naomi – Fireman’s carry/Samoan drop combination to Lana
Cedric Alexander b. Shelton Benjamin – Neuralizer
AJ Styles/Omos b. Elias/Jaxson Ryker – Phenomenal Forearm to Ryker
Drew McIntyre b. Kofi Kingston – Claymore

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Smackdown – December 29, 2006 (Best Of 2006): The Post Christmas Blues

Smackdown
Date: December 29, 2006
Hosts: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show of the year from any brand and that means it’s Best Of time again. This show will likely feature a bit of a better selection than ECW so it should be a nice upgrade. There were some good things to pick from this year so hopefully it’s a rather easy night. Let’s get to it.

Of note: I’ll be posting the full versions of the matches rather than the clipped versions shown on the broadcast.

Michael Cole and JBL welcome us to the show and throw us straight to the first match.

From the Royal Rumble.

Royal Rumble

Ninety second intervals with HHH in at #1 and Rey Mysterio, in a low rider, in at #2. Lawler: “If you’re number one or two, you’re screwed.” This company really doesn’t have much of a memory does it? Rey goes fast to start with a running dropkick to the knee and a headscissors. The right hands in the corner set up the missed 619 and it’s Simon Dean in at #3. Dean stomps on Rey but can only send him to the apron. For some reason Dean thinks HHH will like him and that’s good for an elimination in a hurry.

Rey hits the Bronco Buster on HHH and it’s Psicosis in at #4. Psicosis goes after Rey as well and a swinging sitout faceplant drops him again. An attempt at a Razor’s Edge over the top results in a hurricanrana to get rid of Psicosis. Before anything else can happen, it’s Ric Flair in at #5 (Flair was in five Rumbles. In four of them, he was in the first five entrants.). HHH panics and the fight is on, with Flair grabbing him low but getting poked in the eyes.

A backdrop gets rid of Flair and it’s Big Show in at #6. That means another beatdown on HHH, including the standing legdrop and an elbow. Jonathan Coachman is in at #7 and Big Show gets rid of him as quickly as you would expect. Show stands on HHH’s head again and it’s Bobby Lashley (a dark horse according to Cole) in at #8. A big right hand puts Lashley down but he backdrops Show in a nice power display.

Lashley kicks Show to the floor (not eliminated) and it’s Kane in at #9 as they’re stacking the first part of this thing. Kane and Lashley slug it out with Kane hitting a big boot. Lashley snaps off a belly to belly, knocks down HHH, and hits the Dominator on Kane. It’s Sylvan in at #10, giving us HHH, Mysterio, Big Show, Lashley, Kane and Sylvan.

After Lashley dispatches him even faster than Show got rid of Coach, it’s a double chokeslam to plant Lashley. Kane and Show get rid of him after a strong showing and it’s the giant slugout. They choke each other on the ropes until HHH dumps both of them out (I’m shocked too) so here’s Carlito at #11 to fill in the ring a little more. Carlito stomps on Rey and HHH until a Roddy Piper style eye poke gets HHH out of trouble. Chris Benoit is in at #12 with Cole explaining about Benoit winning last year (hopefully jogging Lawler’s memory a bit).

The Crossface has Carlito in trouble, with HHH making the fast save. That wasn’t the brightest idea in the world but he sends Benoit to the apron where they fight over a suplex attempt. Benoit puts him down and hits the Swanton but here’s Booker T. (back in the long tights) in at #13. Benoit gets rid of Booker in about 20 seconds (Booker was probably still injured) so it’s back to chopping away at everyone else.

Joey Mercury is in at #14 and Benoit gives him a German suplex in a hurry. More chopping ensues as Tatanka of all people is in at #15 to go after HHH. The fans seem to remember him, but that might just be the Florida State Seminoles chant. Everyone pairs off and it’s Johnny Nitro in at #16 as Benoit gets HHH to the apron. Trevor Murdoch is in at #17 (Lawler: “He looks like a big bottle of milk.”) as the ring is getting full in a hurry. Rey is sent to the apron for the third time but is right back in with a basement dropkick to HHH.

Eugene is in at #18 for an airplane spin on Murdoch so Rey gives the two of them a double bulldog. Animal, with bright green shoulder pads, is in at #19. Things slow down again with the only thing between entrances being MNM failing to get rid of Rey. The returning Rob Van Dam is in at #20, giving us HHH, Mysterio, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury, Tatanka, Nitro, Murdoch, Eugene, Animal and Van Dam. Rob goes after almost everyone, including a spinwheel kick to HHH. MNM goes after Rob but he shrugs that off and gets rid of Animal.

Orlando Jordan is in at #21 and doesn’t even get a reaction in his hometown. There are WAY too many people in there and it’s making it hard to do much. Van Dam manages a middle rope kick to Carlito’s face and it’s Chavo Guerrero in at #22. Rolling Thunder hits Jordan and Chavo gets to clean a little house, including Three Amigos to Nitro. For some reason Chavo goes up top and HHH shove shim out without much effort.

Matt Hardy is in at #23 as there is only room for about two people to do anything at a time. MNM dumps Tatanka and it’s Super Crazy in at #24. He comes in with a very high crossbody to MNM and it’s back to fighting on the ropes. Shawn Michaels is in at #25 and PLEASE GET RID OF SOME PEOPLE. Murdoch is Shawn’s first victim and it’s Chris Masters in at #26 because the ring MUST stay overly full. Mercury and Hardy both save themselves and HHH has to do it as well.

Viscera is in at #27 (lucky us) for a Samoan drop on Hardy. There’s the Visagra and Hardy is out for daring to try a Twist of Fate on the monster. Shelton Benjamin is in at #28 as Benoit gets rid of Eugene. There’s a Dragon Whip to HHH as Goldust is in at #29. Crazy seems to have been put out off camera and Randy Orton is in at #30.

Side note: Cole says Orton is coming off a phenomenal 2005. What exactly did he do? Lose the title match against HHH at the Rumble, lose against the Undertaker at Wrestlemania and in the Cell, and need his dad to help him beat Undertaker. Oh and be the sole survivor at Survivor Series (thanks to a distraction), which he had done twice before. That’s phenomenal?

Anyway, the final grouping is HHH, Mysterio, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury, Nitro, Van Dam, Jordan, Michaels, Masters, Viscera, Benjamin, Goldust and Orton, or nearly half of the field. Orton gets rid of Benoit in a hurry to make up for Smackdown and Carlito/Masters dump Viscera. Carlito immediately turns on Masters to eliminate him as they’re picking up the pace in a hurry.

Goldust hits Shattered Dreams on Carlito, and is quickly eliminated by Van Dam. Orton gets rid of Jordan (after a ridiculous sixteen minutes), leaving Shawn and HHH to do their big showdown. MNM breaks that up but Michaels breaks that up and sends Nitro into Mercury to get rid of Joey. Michaels clotheslines Nitro out and skins the cat back in but Shelton jumps him. Shawn superkicks Shelton out without much effort but here’s Vince McMahon to order Michaels out.

Cue Shane McMahon from behind to dump Shawn, who charges back in, chases Shane off, superkicks HHH for old times’ sake, and follows the McMahons to the back. Van Dam gets rid of Carlito and we’re down to Van Dam, HHH, Orton and Mysterio. The tag match breaks out with Van Dam and Mysterio getting the better of it. For some reason Rob goes up and gets crotched by HHH, who sends Rey into Van Dam for the elimination.

Rey has to knock HHH and Orton down at the same time, setting up a double 619. Orton clotheslines Rey down though and powerslams HHH for a bonus. HHH is back up with a spinebuster to Orton but Rey gets rid of HHH to bring the fans WAY back into it. Just because he’s evil, HHH pulls Mysterio to the floor and sends him into the steps. The EDDIE chants start up and Rey manages to slip off Orton’s shoulder and a hurricanrana gives Rey the win.

Rating: B-. It’s good enough, but the Eddie praise got a little rough to take as the match went on. The far bigger problem though was having so many people in the ring at once for long stretches, leaving the people to have to find what openings they could in their limited room. That’s not a good setup for the Rumble and when it’s for the sake of having people like Tatanka and Jordan in there for long stretches, they seem to be missing the point.

Next up is the Diva Search, with Layla winning.

From June 9.

Miz is in the ring to host a Divas bikini contest between Ashley, Jillian Hall (Miz: “She’s buoyant!”), Kristal and Michelle McCool. The first three disrobe, Miz makes jokes, and Michelle stands up for teachers who are being accused of having inappropriate relations with students because the teachers have needs too. Anyway, she leaves because no one should see her A+ body. Ashley wins.

We see JBL losing the US Title to Bobby Lashley and then being retired by Rey Mysterio later in the night.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

We recap Vickie Guerrero/Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio.

From October 20.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

I Quit match. Chavo hammers away in the corner to start but the 619 chants bring Rey back up. Rey sends him outside for the big running flip dive and they’re both down on the floor. A posting puts Chavo down again, followed by Rey dropkicking a chair into Chavo’s face in the corner.

Back up and a Vickie distraction lets Chavo start in on the leg, which has a history of working against Rey. Chavo even ties the chair around the knee for a frog splash, which still isn’t enough to make Rey give up. They go up the ramp with Chavo staying on the knee, only to have Rey kick him off the ramp. The running seated senton to the floor hits Chavo again, which shows you just how high that stage is.

A Crossface isn’t enough to make Chavo quit so Rey chokes with the chair. He can’t follow up though, allowing Chavo to throw him onto some equipment cases. Rey gets in a right hand and climbs the lighting structure but Chavo knocks him into a Tree of Woe in the structure. Some chair shots to the knee are enough to make Rey give up.

Rating: B-. That’s the last you’ll be seeing of Rey until August as he needed another knee surgery. This was a heck of a showcase for Chavo, who really does not have a major win to his credit. Rey was World Champion about three months ago so this still carries some weight. Rey needed to go away and it was nice to see them elevate someone on his way out for a bit.

Teddy Long announced the Smackdown Sprint, which is basically a Beat The Clock Challenge for the World Title shot against Batista at the Royal Rumble.

Cole and JBL talk about Undertaker/Kane vs. MVP/Mr. Kennedy.

From December 15.

MVP/Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker/Kane

MVP gets scared by the fire during his own entrance, which I’m not sure I remember being there before. Kennedy slowly opens the door of the hearse in the aisle and finds nothing, which doesn’t mean much around here. Joined in progress with Kane stomping Kennedy into the corner and then lifting him into the air for the choking. A rake to the eyes allows for the tag off to MVP, who is side slammed down in a hurry. The top rope clothesline makes it even worse and Undertaker comes in to unload in the corner.

Kennedy finally does something worthwhile by offering a distraction to break up Old School and Undertaker gets stomped down for a change. Undertaker is right back with right hands to MVP in the corner though and now Old School connects. Kane tags himself in and the brothers hit some big boots. The double chokeslam plants Kennedy but MVP saves him from the Tombstone. Undertaker stalks MVP to the back as Kennedy and Kane fight on the floor for the double countout.

Rating: C-. This was the teaser trailer for Sunday and that’s all it needed to be. We’ve seen these four fight in various combinations for weeks now and there isn’t much left to do than have the big blowoff matches at the pay per view. I’m glad they didn’t waste time on a long match before the ending either, so while this might not have been very good, it was at least efficient.

Post match Kennedy sends Kane into the steps and gets in the hearse. Kennedy revs the engine but the lights go out, allowing Undertaker to appear in the driver’s seat. That sends Kennedy and MVP running….right into Kane as he sits up for a pretty funny moment. The villains run off in a hurry.

We hear about Undertaker vs. Kennedy and Kane vs. MVP at Armageddon.

We look at the Finlay’s Leprechaun debuting.

From Judgment Day.

Chris Benoit vs. Finlay

They had a good match a few weeks ago so this should work. Finlay takes him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. The lockup goes all the way to the floor and against the barricade before they finally break up. Back in and they go nose to nose until Benoit grabs the legs for a failed Sharpshooter attempt. The chinlock goes on Finlay instead before Benoit switches over to a headlock. Finlay accuses Benoit of an eye poke though and then jumps him when the referee stops to check on things.

It’s a chinlock on Benoit this time but he isn’t sitting in that for very long. Instead it’s Benoit getting up and unloading in the corner, setting up another chinlock. Benoit tries to switch into the Crossface before turning Finlay over for two. Finlay hits him in the face and then pulls on the arm while putting his foot on Benoit’s head for some pulling. The chinlock is countered and Benoit snaps off another German suplex, followed by the Swan Dive for two.

Finlay is right back with a knockdown of his own into a running seated senton and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in the back. A hammerlock/dragon sleeper combination (that’s a new one) keeps Benoit down and Finlay just pounds him in the back. Finlay says get up so he can show Benoit how tough he is. That means a clothesline to drop Benoit again but he’s right back up with a German suplex.

They head outside with Benoit hitting another German suplex on the floor, followed by Three Amigos back inside. The threat of another Swan Dive makes Finlay knock him off the top, with Benoit’s head hitting the barricade. Back in and Benoit’s shoulder goes into the post but he’s fine enough to snap on the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: B+. Oh like these two getting twenty minutes wasn’t going to be really good. They had an awesome match a few weeks back and now they did it again on the bigger stage. These two compliment each other really well and it felt like a fight with wrestling moves instead of a match, which worked very well. I could go for it again and it’s the kind of match where you could see it going either way.

Here’s a rapid fire recap of Gregory Helms, Paul London and Brian Kendrick, Jimmy Wang Yang, Boogeyman, Miz and Vito, the latter of whom kissed Cole. This was described as “fun”. That last bit was never before seen, which does make me feel a bit better.

Another Tribute to the Troops video.

We look at the rise of King Booker, which leads us to this.

From Survivor Series.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Batista

Batista is challenging and starts fast by jumping him before the bell. They get inside to officially start the match with Batista hammering away in the corner. The threat of a Batista Bomb sends Booker bailing to the floor and the fans aren’t pleased. Back in and Batista hammers away even more but a hot shot gets Booker out of trouble. A catapult sends Batista throat first into the bottom rope and Booker stomps away even more.

Booker pokes him in the eye but you don’t need two eyes to hit a side slam for two. They head to the apron for a slugout with Batista knocking him back in. Sharmell grabs the leg though and Booker kicks him out to the floor again. Back in and Booker pounds him down into a chinlock as Cole asks JBL what it feels like to try and get the title back. JBL: “I’m not a loser Michael. Bring up something else.”

Batista fights up and hits the clotheslines into a big boot to send Booker outside. That means a whip into the steps, followed by a top rope shoulder (dang) for two back inside. Booker is right back with a Bookend for two but Batista is up with the Batista Bomb. They’re right next to the rope so Booker saves himself, allowing Sharmell to hand him the title. A Sharmell distraction doesn’t work though as Batista ducks the shot and takes the belt away. Batista’s belt shot is enough for the pin, the title, and the energized celebration.

Rating: D, This really didn’t work and the ending was stupid. How much of a conqueror does this make Batista, when he needed a belt shot to beat Booker? It’s a reclaiming the glory story and that should work, but the lack of drama didn’t help anything. Pretty awful main event with the main bright spot being the fact that they didn’t go long here. It’s the longest match of the show at less than fourteen minutes and it felt every one of them.

Cole and JBL wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s always a little weird when “Best Of Smackdown” turns into “Best Of Smackdown People In Various Places”. This was what you would expect from a clip show with some good matches, including some that you have probably forgotten about. What we got was good enough though, even if it had a few major names missing (Kurt Angle, Great Khali, Mark Henry etc.). Good show here, as it’s really, really had to have a bad Best Of show.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




New Column: The New Greatest Tag Team: On Earth

These guys give me hope for the future.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-new-greatest-tag-team-earth/




Tribute To The Troops 2006: Merry Christmas

Tribute To The Troops 2006
Date: December 25, 2006
Location: Camp Victory, Baghdad, Iraq
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for a pretty cool tradition as this is the annual Tribute To The Troops show. This time around they are over in Iraq for a show where the wrestling does not mean a thing and we get to see a bunch of wrestlers and celebrities talk about how great the military is. This may or may not be your cup of beverage but let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the USO and others helping to entertaining the troops. Tonight, WWE will be doing exactly the same.

John Cena vs. Edge

Non-title. Cena takes him down with a headlock takeover but Edge gets to his feet and takes it into the corner. That earns him a hiptoss and slam for two but Cena misses a charge and walks into a DDT. Some right hands in the corner keep Cena in trouble until he gets dropped face first onto the top turnbuckle. A clothesline cuts Cena off again and he heads to the apron, meaning it’s time for a slugout. Cena gets knocked off the top and out to the floor, setting up the baseball slide as we take a break.

Back with Edge working on a bodyscissors to stay on the ribs but Cena fights up. The Throwback drops Edge again and it’s time for a double breather. There’s a big boot to give Edge two but he takes too much time grabbing a chair, allowing Cena to get two off a rollup. A spinwheel kick sets up a quickly broken camel clutch on Cena, who starts the expected comeback. The FU is countered into the Impaler though and Edge goes up top….where he gets caught by Cena, only to counter into an electric chair to put Cena down again. The spear hits corner though and the FU finishes Edge.

Rating: C+. Pretty much a house show main event here, which these two have had probably a hundred times by now. Granted this isn’t a show where the wrestling itself is going to matter whatsoever. You aren’t going to have the All American Boy losing here though and it isn’t like anyone losing to Cena is hurt whatsoever. Is there a reason they didn’t make this a title match though?

A General gave a nice speech about WWE and giving the soldiers some Americana.

Video on wrestlers interacting with troops.

CM Punk and Shelton Benjamin wish the troops and their families a happy holidays.

CM Punk vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton jumps him to start but the threat of a right hand sends him outside as we get some credits for the military people who helped air the show. Back in and Punk is sent shoulder first into the post, setting up a rather logical shoulder breaker. Punk fights out of an armbar but a hair pull puts him right back down. That means a second armbar for Punk to fight out of, setting up some kicks into a bulldog. A military helicopter flies by as Shelton jumps the corner to grab a superplex for two. The Stinger Splash misses though and Punk grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. Much quicker match here and it worked well enough. Punk winning by fluke is the right way to go as he isn’t ready for a dominant win over Benjamin, but you can see that WWE has some plans for him. Good enough match here with the arm work and Punk won, meaning there isn’t much to complain about.

Some troops say hi and one gets pinned.

Johnny Nitro vs. Undertaker

Melina is here too and this could be interesting. Undertaker’s entrance doesn’t work as well in the light, but the lack of hat and coat is understandable in the desert. Nitro dodges around to start and gets in a few right hands in the corner. That earns him a quick toss into the same corner and some much bigger right hands as the dominance begins. Undertaker starts cranking on the arm and Old School connects. Nitro slips out of the Last Ride though and hits an enziguri but Undertaker clotheslines him down. Snake Eyes into the big boot sets up the chokeslam and it’s a Tombstone for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Another short and to the point match here with Undertaker’s appearance alone giving the soldiers a thrill. I believe this is the only singles match that these two would ever have, which is kind of surprising as you would think they might have met each other down the line at some point. Still though, just a quick near squash here and for a show like this, that’s the right idea.

Undertaker poses for a good while.

Earlier today, Lilian Garcia sang the National Anthem, which as usual, is great.

Wrestlers and troops say seasons greetings.

Video on wrestlers interacting with troops and doing military things when mortar attacks went off. Everyone had to go and take cover, which is quite the moment.Fourteen soldiers were injured.

Bobby Lashley vs. Hardcore Holly

Non-title. Lashley drives him into the corner to start and busts out the gorilla press, which always looks good. A shoulder puts Holly down again and a snap suplex gets two. There’s the delayed vertical suplex for the same and they go outside, where Holly sends him hard into the steps. Back in and Holly sends the shoulder into the post, setting up the armbar. Lashley fights up and slaps on a torture rack, which he drops down into a backbreaker for another two. Holly gets in his own suplex but Lashley grabs a running powerslam for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another short and to the point match here with Lashley, the ex-military guy, getting to look pretty dominant in the win. Lashley is the next big thing in ECW and it is making him feel like a much bigger deal, even if he is stuck beating up people like Holly and Test every so often.

An Iraqi Army captain explains some of what the two militaries are doing.

Wrestlers meet troops and do stuff.

Umaga vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title. Hardy hammers away to start but gets knocked down without much effort. The sitdown splash misses though and they head outside with Umaga sending him into the post. Another ram into the barricade keeps Hardy in trouble and they head back inside for a kick to the spine. The nerve hold goes on to keep Hardy down but Umaga’s top rope splash misses. Hardy is back up with the Whisper in the Wind for two and there’s the Twist of Fate. The Swanton only hits knees though and Umaga unloads in the corner. The running hip attack sets up the Samoan Spike to put Hardy away.

Rating: C. Ok then. I’m not sure what the point was in having the champion lose here but again, it isn’t like it matters. Umaga is on a roll at this point and we are going to be getting a heck of a showdown with Cena at the pay per view. Going over Hardy makes Umaga look good, though it is kind of weird to see a champion getting mostly squashed.

The Director of Armed Forces Entertainment gives a lieutenant the 2.6 millionth letter the military has received.

Carlito vs. Randy Orton

Carlito’s headlock doesn’t last long to start so he goes with the left hands in the corner instead. An armdrag sets up an armbar but Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick. A swinging side slam gives Orton two and we hit the chinlock. Carlito fights up for the slugout and the springboard elbow to the face gets two. The RKO is countered into the Backstabber but Orton grabs the ropes to save himself. A rollup with feet on the ropes gets two so Carlito rolls him up and grabs the trunks for the pin.

Rating: C-. They couldn’t have had Carlito lose to Umaga and have Hardy win here? Anyway, Carlito continues to not be the most inspiring guy and having him beat Orton feels a bit out of place. The fans seemed to like the cheating win at the end though and it’s nice to give the soldiers something to cheer.

Santa meets some of the women, who have been naughty this year.

Some troops worked in one of Saddam Hussein’s palaces.

And now, JBL Claus (pull your beard up man). Santa talks about how great the troops are and brings out Krystal, Maria and Torrie to meet some troops. Santa: “Does Santa Claus rock or what?” We get some jokes about how the women look and then Santa has them throw out some gifts. This goes on for a good bit until Chris Masters comes out to interrupt.

Masters says he hates Christmas and doesn’t believe in Santa Claus. He doesn’t like the way the troops drool over Santa’s helpers, so let’s have a Masterlock Challenge for one of the troops. Well hang on a second, as first he is challenging Santa to the Masterlock Challenge. The hold goes on and JR thinks Rudolph needs to make a save. Santa is out and Masters wins, saying there is no Christmas (because Masters doesn’t get that Santa has already done his work for the year).

Masters looks for a soldier to take the challenge and picks one of the smallest around. The Masterlock goes on again and this time JBL comes in to break kick Masters in the back….which is enough to break the hold and the soldier wins. JBL and the women say Merry Christmas to wrap it up.

One more long video on the trip ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I never know how to rate a show like this but this is the very basic version compared to what the show would become. What we got here was good enough though as the wrestling was fine enough and it still felt special. Above all else, the idea of going over to Iraq makes the show come off as important. WWE putting in some effort is nice and this worked out rather well for a Christmas night special.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Monday Night Raw – December 18, 2006: George Bush Is Here

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 18, 2006
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 11,324
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last regular(ish) Raw of the year as next week is a trip to Iraq for Tribute to the Troops. This week is another big one though as we have a special three hour edition. The opening match will be a thirty man battle royal for a shot at John Cena’s WWE Title later in the night, so they’re going pretty hard with this one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Shawn Michaels, Jerry Lawler, Rory, Robbie, Edge, Val Venis, JTG, Shad Gaspard, Viscera, Jim Duggan, Carlito, Snitsky, Ric Flair, Randy Orton, Chris Masters, Sgt. Slaughter, HHH, Jeff Hardy, Johnny Nitro, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, Ron Simmons, Shelton Benjamin, Brooklyn Brawler, Super Crazy, Charlie Haas, Eugene, Kenny, Johnny, Rob Conway

The brawl is on in a hurry and egads I’m going to have a hard time figuring out who all is in this. Edge chills on the floor to start (as you would expect) and it’s a huge brawl otherwise. Carlito chases Masters outside and gets speared down by Edge, who throws him inside so Masters can get the elimination. Duggan gets rid of the Brawler and Shelton has to hang on with his feet dangling over the floor.

Duggan is put out and Slaughter is tossed as well to clear the ring out a bit. Flair can’t toss Orton as Edge has gotten in and has to save himself from a HHH elimination attempt. The brawling continues as we have gone a good while now without an elimination. HHH facebusters Viscera though and DX gets rid of him as we take a break. Back with JTG saving himself, though Johnny and Venis aren’t so lucky as Simmons gets rid of them.

Cryme Tyme gets rid of Simmons as well, which does not seem to please him. He even grabs the mic and says the catchphrase. JTG is out (with JR calling him Shad) as the Highlanders seem to have been put out during the break. Shad is tossed as well, followed by Haas and Benjamin. There goes Lawler and Super Crazy eliminates both himself and Hardy (in a bit of an upset).

The ring has been cleared out a lot and HHH DDTs Snitsky to put him down (though not out). DX uses the hard camera to distract Eugene and get rid of him, with Snitsky and Murdoch following him. A bunch of people get together to get rid of Johnny and Flair, leaving us with HHH, Shawn, Cade, Nitro, Masters, Edge and Orton. DX stares everyone else down and we take a break.

Back with DX getting beaten down by two different sets of villains. HHH fights back and clotheslines Masters out but the other four get rid of HHH, leaving Shawn, Cade, Nitro, Edge and Orton. Shawn starts fast and throws Nitro out, setting up the flying forearm to Edge. Atomic drops slow down Cade and Orton and the latter gets hit with the top rope elbow. The non-eliminated Edge chills on the floor as Shawn gets knocked down again, only to have Orton toss out Cade. Back up and Shawn tosses out Orton but Edge sneaks up on the apron and pulls him out for the win and the title shot.

Rating: C. These things are always hard to rate but the long stretch near the beginning with so few eliminations hurt it a bit. Edge vs. Cena will be fine as a main event as they can have a fine match without saying a word to each other and the ending had some drama to make things work better. That being said, the “hey he’s not out” ending needs to be erased from any and all history. The rest of the match was a battle royal, so you should know what you’re getting out of it.

Vince McMahon invites us to watch Tribute To The Troops next week. I’d come for the Creed songs.

Edge is ready to win and tells Randy Orton that he is looking for bigger goals. Like the WWE Title.

We look at Chris Masters Masterlocking Torrie Wilson last week until Carlito made the save.

A scared Maria talks to Chris Masters about what happened last week. Masters threatens to put her in the Masterlock and is ready to beat Carlito tonight.

We look at Joey Mercury’s nose being destroyed last night.

We meet Russian mixed martial artist Vladimir Kozlov, who is glad to be in America and would love to wrestle one day. Russian is spoken and booing is heard. Granted that might be for Todd Grisham calling him Victor.

Carlito vs. Chris Masters

Or maybe not as Carlito jumps Masters and the fight is on before the bell. Carlito gets sent into a cameraman and is busted open hardway but manages to chase Masters into the crowd and away anyway.

Johnny Nitro/Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin vs. Hardys

Shelton mocks Matt for being banged up after last night’s ladder match before grabbing him with a waistlock. An armbar on the left arm has Matt in more trouble but he’s able to get over to Jeff for the tag anyway. A belly to back suplex takes Jeff down and Haas gets to stomp away. Nitro hammers on the back and knocks Jeff into the other corner to punch him in the face (as you do in wrestling).

The yet to be named Sling Blade gets Jeff out of trouble though and Matt comes in to take over on Haas. Poetry In Motion connects as everything breaks down. The Hardys clean house and Jeff dives onto Haas and Benjamin, leaving Matt to moonsault onto everyone. Back from a break with Shelton working on Jeff’s leg, which means it’s time for the villains to take turns on it.

Nitro hangs it over the rope and hits the slingshot dive onto said leg, meaning Melina can get in a shot of her own. Back in and Shelton pulls on the leg again but Jeff flips up and manages a mule kick for the hot tag Matt. Everything breaks down and a shot to the bad leg sends Jeff outside. Matt gets his neck snapped across the top rope though and Shelton grabs a rollup with tights for the cheating pin.

Rating: C+. This took its time but it told a nice story with the leg keeping Jeff down throughout. That’s all you need for something like this most of the time and it possibly sets up Haas/Benjamin vs. the Hardys in the near future. I’m not sure what to think of the idea of multiple top level tag teams in WWE at this point, but a match at New Year’s Revolution could work out rather well.

Post match the Hardys take quite the beatdown to leave them laying again.

Armando Alejandro Estrada doesn’t care if Umaga faces Edge or John Cena at New Year’s Revolution, but they want it to be Cena for some revenge.

Kevin Federline is here and tells Melina and Johnny Nitro that he has something he has to do.

Quick trailer for Rocky Balboa.

And now, Jerry Lawler interviews Sylvester Stallone about Rocky Balboa. Stallone says the series is done after this because he wants to wrap it up on a high note. He thinks a wrestling reality show (like his Contender boxing series) could work because he remembers the boxing vs. wrestling scene in Rocky III. Hogan would beat Rocky Balboa too and Kevin Federline has a death wish to fight John Cena on Raw. Stallone actually talked like a person here instead of a celebrity who wanted to promote something.

Ric Flair vs. Kenny Dykstra

That wold be the same Kenny from the Spirit Squad. They grapple around to start before going outside, where Kenny grabs a suplex. Back in and another suplex gets two, followed by the chinlock. Kenny rains down right hands in the corner until an atomic drop cuts him off. Flair goes up top and, of course, gets caught, allowing Kenny to miss the top rope legdrop. Kenny’s running knee in the corner hits corner but he’s fine enough to grab a sunset flip for the completely clean pin.

Rating: C-. Naming Kenny after a baseball player (Lenny Dykstra) isn’t exactly the best way to make him into a star but giving him a pin over Flair could help a bit. They’re trying something with him after the Spirit Squad and Kenny was presented as the only one of them worth anything, but they really can’t just let him be Ken Doane? It sounds better than what they went with, which is going to be another problem for him.

Post match Flair offers a handshake but Kenny walks away.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Cena is defending and grabs a headlock to start as we go with one of the classics. That’s broken up with a toss to the floor and Cena goes face first into the steps. Back in and Edge grabs a neckbreaker over the ropes for two. The neck crank goes on but Cena fights up for a double clothesline. We take a break and come back with Cena fighting out of a sleeper on the mat. That earns him a headbutt into a reverse cross armbreaker (that’s a new one) but Cena powers out again.

Cena has to power out of a cravate as well and this time he hits a running Blockbuster to get a real breather. The comeback is on with the flying shoulders into a ProtoBomb but the Shuffle misses for a change. Edge hits the spear for two with Cena having to grab the rope for the save.

With nothing on the mat working, Edge puts him on top but gets shoved down, allowing Cena to hit the top rope Fameasser (which Lawler implies is making its debut) for two. The FU is countered but the counter is countered into a reverse DDT to give Cena two more. The ref is bumped as another FU is countered so here’s Randy Orton for the RKO to Cena. Cue DX to take care of Rated-RKO though, including the Pedigree to Edge. Cena wakes up and retains the title.

Rating: B. The ending was a fine way to get out of the match without either of them taking a fall or of course changing the title. It is always nice to see a pay per view match get some extra build like this and they did that rather well with the finish. This was a good TV match on a big show, which shouldn’t be shocking given who was in there.

Later tonight: Edge/DX vs. Rated-RKO/Umaga. Dang Edge better get a big bonus for this show.

Here is Cryme Tyme for a chat. They don’t like what Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas have been saying about them so it’s time to set the record straight. So here’s George W. Bush, or at least someone bearing a passable resemblance, flanked by the best developmental/local indy wrestlers portraying Secret Service agents available. Bush talks about how Cryme Tyme are his friends, because that rapper Kanye West is wrong about him hating black people.

How can he hate black people when he is friends with Colin Powell and Condoleeza Rice (Bush: “There’s one hot little black b****!”) are friends? Then there is George Jefferson, who wrote the Declaration of Independence! Bush: “He’s my ni….” Shad: “WHOA WHOA WHOA! Secret Service or not, you’ll get your a** beat right here.” Bush doesn’t like Haas and Benjamin and that’s it. Well after Bush dances to Cryme Tyme’s music….and finds out they stole his wallet. Bush leaves but flips off the crowd on the way out. This was even worse than it seems if you can wrap your head around that.

Victoria vs. Mickie James

Non-title, as the title match is announced for New Year’s Revolution. Victoria kicks her in the face and puts her on top, meaning it’s a superplex right back down. Mickie is right back with a victory roll for two so Victoria sends her face first into the buckle to knock her silly again. That doesn’t last long either as Mickie hits a running clothesline and elbow to the face (as opposed to doing the same thing over and over, which gets really old) but the MickieDT is countered into a drape over the top rope. A kick to the face sets up the Widow’s Peak to give Victoria the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much time to use here and it’s annoying to have the champ lose to set up a title match. Losing to Victoria is hardly some big upset, but she won clean here. I’m not a fan of letting a champ lose like this but it is a common trope for WWE and that has been a problem for a long time.

Post match, Victoria checks Mickie’s name off the list. I’m sure that won’t come back to haunt her.

Jim Ross is in the ring and talks about how so many comedians have used Kevin Federline as a punchline. Some people say he is just misunderstood though, so here is Federline himself to address the world. Federline says there is no K Fed, because that is a personality the media invented. The real Kevin Federline takes pride in overcoming the odds and shocking the world. That’s what he is going to do against Cena on January 1 because 2007 is a new year. He wants some and he’s going to get some. That match can’t get here soon enough so we can be done with this goon.

New Year’s Revolution rundown.

We recap Edge’s long night.

Rated-RKO/Umaga vs. John Cena/D-Generation X

Cena and Orton start things off with the former hitting a release fisherman’s suplex for an early two. Shawn comes in to punch Orton and then does the same thing to Edge. Umaga comes in with a clothesline and then stomps away at Shawn (with some bonus yelling). Edge tags himself back in and Estrada has to stop Umaga from eating him. A suplex drops Edge to give Shawn a breather and sets up the falling tag to bring in HHH.

Umaga comes in as well though and a series of clotheslines finally manage to put him down. Everything breaks down and the Samoan Spike takes HHH down. Cena gets hit in the throat (sans spike) but is right back up with a HARD running shoulder to put Umaga on the floor. The two of them brawl to the back and Cena throws Umaga through part of the stage. That leaves HHH to be sent into the steps and a heck of a chair shots knocks him over the barricade for the DQ.

Rating: C+. I can always go for a main event six man tag and this one worked out rather well. There is something fun about combining two feuds into one as you can have some combinations to keep things fresh and also set up the major matches themselves. Good stuff here, with the ending being a fine way to make Rated-RKO look like threats.

Post match it’s a double RKO onto a chair to knock Shawn out, setting up the Conchairto on the announcers’ table to HHH. Orton adds another one to the very bloody HHH but referees save Shawn (also bleeding) from the same fate inside. Everyone is scared as DX is shaking to end the show (and the year for all intents and purpose).

Overall Rating: C+. They made this feel like a special show and then as usual, the year ends on a big note. I had fun with this and it didn’t feel like it was three hours, though I doubt Edge feels the same way. New Year’s Revolution is looking good so far and they should be fine after losing next week. Granted the Federline stuff was annoying, but one or two bad things in a three hour show isn’t bad.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 17, 2021: The Fine Print Excuse

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 17, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Adnan Virk, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re done with Wrestlemania Backlash, where the Raw side featured Wrestlemania rematches with Braun Strowman and Charlotte thrown in, plus Miz and John Morrison being devoured by zombies. I’m going to assume things will pick up from here, but we are now about a month away from Hell in a Cell, meaning it could be rematches a go-go. Let’s get to it.

Here is Wrestlemania Backlash if you need a recap.

A group of women escort Bobby Lashley into the arena, where MVP handles the introduction. After a look back at last night’s triple threat match, MVP talks about Braun Strowman having broken ribs and Drew McIntyre not being able to get out of bed. On top of that, Lashley did all of that with a bad hand. Lashley has insisted on working tonight so the open challenge (erg) is on. Cue Drew McIntyre to say he accepts but MVP says McIntyre cut him off: the challenge was to anyone OTHER than McIntyre and Strowman. McIntyre knocks Lashley out to the floor, where MVP has to hold him back.

AJ Styles vs. Elias

Omos and Jaxson Ryker are here too. AJ snaps off the dropkick to start but walks into a suplex to send him into the corner. That means some shoulders to the ribs and forearms to the face to put AJ down, setting up a baseball slide to send AJ into the post. AJ clotheslines him outside though and we take a break.

Back with Elias hitting a backdrop and a spinning spinebuster for two, setting up the chinlock. Elias stops to pose but then grabs the chinlock again, with AJ fighting up to hit the Pele. The fireman’s carry backbreaker gets two but Elias’ jumping knee to the face gets the same. AJ gets in a few shots and gets sent to the apron, where he hits Elias in the head. The Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up but Ryker pulls him down for the DQ at 10:46.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable match here, with Styles being able to get decent out of anyone. AJ and Omos seemed to be faces here, which would not be the worst idea. Then again, it was a match involving Elias and Ryker so being the more popular ones is not exactly a heck of a trick.

Post match Omos stalks Ryker to the back as Elias gets to pose.

Johnny Gargano is ready to defend the North American Title against Bronson Reed inside a cage tomorrow on NXT.

We look back at Randy Orton getting the pin in a tag match last week and the laying out New Day with RKO’s after the match.

New Day got Riddle’s message (via pigeon mail) about how there is a snake to see them (and no, it wasn’t a hallucination). They run into Randy Orton, who was told to come here to see Adam Pearce. It seems that we have a Riddle ruse, because he wants them to be a foursome. Orton isn’t going to apologize though, which Kofi dubs as “a reptile dysfunction.” Orton vs. Kofi is set for tonight. Riddle tries to calm Orton down but gets shushed again. These two are solid silver together.

It’s time for Alexa’s Playground, which is now a talk show. The guests are Tamina and Natalya, with the latter talking about how special it was to win the titles. Tamina wants to leave but Bliss has a question: what is their favorite color? Pink for Natalya and black and blue for Tamina, which would look good on Bliss if she tries anything. They have a rematch with Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler tonight, but Bliss would rather talk about Lily collecting the wings of dead insects. The champs leave.

Angel Garza vs. Drew Gulak

Rematch from two weeks ago when Garza won and then violated Gulak with a rose. Garza TAKES OFF HIS PANTS to start but gets pulled into a quick abdominal stretch. That’s broken up so Garza hits a reverse slingshot suplex, with Gulak landing on his feet. That earns him a basement dropkick as Gulak is rocked early. A delayed butterfly backbreaker sets up the Wing Clipper to finish Gulak at 2:10.

Post match Garza puts the rose in Gulak’s mouth.

R-Truth (hey he’s still here) is trying to hide because he has an Open Challenge tonight. Actually it’s Bobby Lashley, which Truth thinks means Ricky Bobby. He’s a lot happier that it isn’t him, but Akira Tozawa runs in to roll him up for the title. Truth: “THE TURNTABLES HAVE TURNED!”

Eva Marie is a supermodel who wants to be a super role model. The Evalution is coming.

Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Xavier Woods and Riddle are here too. Orton’s headlock doesn’t last long as Kingston knocks him to the floor. Back in and we hit the armbar to keep Orton in trouble, as Woods talks about how the legend is beating the Legend Killer. Kingston hits whatever he calls the middle of the ropes Vader Bomb for two and goes back to the arm. Orton is back with some choking on the ropes and we hit the chinlock in a hurry. Kofi fights up with a chop but walks into the powerslam to put him down again. Woods is right there with the trombone solo to distract Orton though and Kofi grabs the rollup for the pin at 5:07.

Rating: C-. These two are always worth a look, even if that look ends with another lame distraction finish. I’m curious about where this feud is going though, as they are actually making Orton and Riddle into a team (for the moment at least) rather than people doing something to set up a feud. That’s interesting, and hopefully it continues to be so.

Post match the staredown is on with Riddle shoving Woods down.

Naomi and Lana and Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke aren’t happy with Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler getting an automatic rematch. Charlotte comes in and says she needs to talk to Sonya Deville alone, so there goes everyone else. She wants her title match but is told she has to beat Asuka tonight. Cue Rhea Ripley, to say she would love some new competition. Staring ensues.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Tamina/Natalya vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax

Baszler and Jax, with Reginald, are challenging. Jax runs Natalya over to start and it’s off to Shayna to work on the arm. That’s broken up and the hot tag brings in Tamina to clean house. Baszler grabs the Kirifuda Clutch….but here are Alexa Bliss and Lily for the evil laugh. Then fire shoots out of a post to burn Reginald (who was three feet away). The distraction sets up the Hart Attack to finish Baszler at 3:04.

Rating: D+. This was just an excuse to get Alexa and Lily out there, meaning there wasn’t much to see. I can go with the rematch being burned off if they just had to do one, so it isn’t like there is much to complain about. The match didn’t have time to do anything when so much of the match was spent on Bliss and a demonic doll with fire powers.

Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Rematch from last night’s Kickoff Show. Before the match, Sheamus complains about Ricochet stealing his hat and coat after losing last night. In the back, Ricochet puts on said hat and coat and mocks Sheamus’ accent before coming to the ring. Sheamus knees him in the ribs in a hurry and sends Ricochet into the corner. The armbar goes on as commentary argues about Ricochet being a thief. They head outside with Sheamus sending him into the timekeeper’s area as we take a break.

Back with Ricochet fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught in a Dublin Smile. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two but Ricochet catches him on top. A super Spanish Fly connects (with Sheamus coming up grabbing his knee) for two and Sheamus can barely stand. The springboard clothesline in to the running shooting star gives Ricochet two more but his Lionsault hits knees.

The Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus gets caught in the ropes, setting up a jumping neckbreaker. Ricochet goes up top so Sheamus rolls outside, meaning it’s a high crossbody to drop him again. Back in and a springboard 450 gives Ricochet two more but Sheamus knees him out of the air….for two. Dang that was a good false finish. The Brogue Kick finishes for Sheamus about ten seconds later at 13:26, making me wonder if that knee was supposed to be the finish.

Rating: C+. I was buying some of those near falls, even if it’s disappointing to have Ricochet lose again. If nothing else though, it’s great to see him getting on television for a change, because that has not been the case nearly often enough. At the very least, it is nice to see some fresh faces on the show, which certainly have been missing as of late.

Post match Sheamus says his other shoulder feels empty, so he might be coming for Lashley’s title tonight.

Mace and T-Bar do their best Ascension impression, saying one of them is coming for Lashley’s Title tonight.

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Asuka starts fast with the hip attack against the ropes but Charlotte elbows her down. A legsweep sends Charlotte to the apron for another hip attack. Charlotte gets in her own legsweep….and here is Rhea Ripley as we take a break. Back (with Ripley watching at ringside) with Asuka fighting out of a chinlock but getting chopped back down.

A pinfall reversal sequence goes nowhere as Charlotte takes her down into a figure four necklock. Asuka tries to fight back but gets kicked in the face for two instead. Natural Selection and the Asuka Lock are blocked so Charlotte elbows her in the face for two. A super Spanish Fly misses and Asuka hits a missile dropkick for her own two.

Asuka pulls her into a kneebar and then a triangle choke, with Charlotte reversing into a Boston crab. That’s broken up and Asuka pulls her into the Asuka Lock. Charlotte makes it to the rope for the break and they head outside, with Charlotte getting distracted by Ripley. Back in and Asuka rolls her up for two, allowing Charlotte to go for the Figure Four, which is countered into a small package to give Asuka the pin at 16:40.

Rating: B. That is probably Charlotte’s best match since the return as they were working out there. It’s nice to see Asuka getting a win, though it felt more like Charlotte lost than Asuka beating her. This is going to set up Charlotte vs. Ripley for the title somehow, as that is the match they have been wanting to do since last year’s Wrestlemania, hopefully with Ripley getting her win back. For now though, very good TV match.

John Morrison is mostly fine after last night’s zombie attack, even though they haven’t been to a dentist in months. Miz may never be the same though, and tonight’s match is dedicated to him.

Damian Priest vs. John Morrison

Lumberjack match, including Nikki Cross making her return at ringside. Priest strikes away to start and Morrison realizes he can’t escape. After some stomping in the corner, Morrison finally escapes to the floor where he sends Akira Tozawa inside. A flip off the apron doesn’t get Morrison very far and we take a break.

Back with Morrison stomping away and hitting a running knee to the face for two. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Priest fights up and hits a Dominator into a DDT. The lumberjacks get in the fight on the floor, including Cedric Alexander diving onto Shelton Benjamin. Priest superplexes Morrison onto the pile for the big crash (with Morrison landing hard), followed by a super hurricanrana back inside. Hit the Lights finishes Morrison at 12:06.

Rating: C. Now let it be done for good between Priest and Miz/Morrison. This has been going on for about four months now and it is way past the point where it should be finished. Priest wins again and there is nothing left for them to do against each other. The lumberjack stipulation felt like a way to make up for last night and the lack of zombies helped a lot.

Post match Priest says he might accept Bobby Lashley’s open challenge.

Eva Marie wants to be a hero people can look up to.

Shelton Benjamin doesn’t want to talk about Cedric Alexander, so here is Cedric Alexander. Cedric talks about how Shelton is worthless….and gets dropped with a right hand.

We look back at the opening segment.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. ???

Lashley is defending against…..Kofi Kingston? Never mind actually, as MVP says he never said this should be a title match.

Bobby Lashley vs. Kofi Kingston

Non-title and Kofi jumps him at the bell, earning himself a spinebuster for two. Some knees to the head get Kofi out of a delayed suplex attempt, followed by three straight one footed dropkicks to the floor. There’s the big dive over the top to drop Lashley and we take a break. We come back with…..a clip from earlier tonight, with Drew McIntyre answering the open challenge. Now that they have covered that it was not going to be a title match, we get back to the ring where Lashley knocks him into the corner and choked on the rope. Now the delayed vertical suplex connects for two and we hit the waistlock.

Kofi fights up and hits a DDT for two, setting up the Boom Drop. Lashley pops back up for a Downward Spiral but Woods offers a trombone concert. That’s enough of a distraction for Kingston to hit a top rope DDT across the top, sending Lashley head first into the apron. Back in and the SOS is countered into the spinning Dominator. Lashley takes him outside for a posting so Woods yells a lot, earning himself an ejection. The distraction lets MVP load up the cane but here is Drew McIntyre to take it away and hit Lashley. Kingston grabs the rollup pin at 10:50.

Rating: C. I can always go for Kingston fighting his way through a match, even if the ending is likely to set up McIntyre vs. Lashley again rather than Kingston vs. Lashley II. TO be fair, that isn’t much of a pay per view match, but it is something fresh after months of Lashley vs. McIntyre. We’ll probably get a Kofi title match on Raw, but I can’t picture it going much further than that. Kofi getting the shot was certainly surprising and there were worse options, though it wasn’t exactly exciting.

Overall Rating: C-. This was not a great or even very good show, as it still had a bunch of the nonsense that has dragged Raw down for weeks (if not longer). The Lily stuff is annoying and the World Title picture continues to feel repetitive and Priest vs. Miz/Morrison somehow continued, but this was a HUGE upgrade over recent weeks. This was a case where the show was better just because it didn’t have nearly as much bad, and for Raw that is an improvement. They have a long way to go, but this was a watchable enough show and didn’t have anything too terrible (or at least nothing terrible and long). I’ll take that these days.

Results

AJ Styles b. Elias via DQ when Jaxson Ryker interfered

Angel Garza b. Drew Gulak – Wing Clipper
Kofi Kingston b. Randy Orton – Rollup

Tamina/Natalya b. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler – Hart Attack to Baszler

Sheamus b. Ricochet – Brogue Kick

Asuka b. Charlotte – Small package

Damian Priest b. John Morrison – Hit The Lights

Kofi Kingston b. Bobby Lashley – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.